June 28, 2006
(Spoken)
Well, I think I finally found me a sure-fire way to forget.
It's s'simple, I'm surprised I hadn't done thought of it before yet.
It's foolproof... well it's foolhardy, maybe, but who knows.
Anyway, here I am, walkin' down toward where the cold, dark water flows.
All it takes is...
One dyin' and a buryin'. One dyin' and a buryin'.
Some cryin', six carryin' me, I wanta to be free. (Spoken)
Oh-ho, I wanta be free, free from all this heartache and regret,
And free from pinin' for the love I can't forget.
The love that once was warm and then just somehow turned to hate.
Made my life a prison from which there's only one escape.
That... (Sung)
One dyin' and a buryin'. One dyin' and a buryin'.
Some cryin', six carryin' me, I wanta to be free.
One dyin' and a buryin'. One dyin' and a buryin'.
Some cryin', six carryin' me... I wanta to be free.
Posted by: Stevie at 05:11 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
June 27, 2006
After having been up all night...
smoking too many cigarettes, reading mostly very nice things about Rob, being on the phone with Paul, bawling my head off with Paul and figuring out a LOTTA things about my life, Rob's life and things of that nature, I'm having an "interesting" morning.
For instance, I killed my Walkman CD player with a hammer. Hey, it pissed me off. Then, in the last day or so, I managed to talk my way into "overages" on my cell and I discovered the Nextel computer had shut me down.So, I called them and somehow managed to get them to turn me back on.
I truly didn't expect that.
They NEVER do that, til ya give 'em money.
But, I didn't yet and they did. They made "arrangements" with me.
Voluntarily, even. Wow.
Thanks. wft?
*scratchin' mah head over THAT, lem'me tell ya* One of the things I've figured out about alla this is what I'm going to do with this emotion, before it kills me. And, it's not only the emotion from this situation that's making me think.
This is just the FLOOD of emotion that's making me realize I need to get a handle on it all, before it runs my ass over. To be honest, I've had an "emotional" coupla months. Good emotions and bad. Losing jobs, kittens dying, finding my horse, finding Glen...
It's been both good and not s'good, but it's all been emotional on one level or another. And, I know that if I let this situation with Rob "get" me, it's gonna send me to a hell I've never even thought of. So, what I'm gonna do instead is what I told Velociman.
I'm gonna take the life, MY life, that Rob gave back to me when I discovered blogging because of him and live it in such a manner as to make him as proud of me as I possibly can. One way I'm gonna do that is by taking what's happened for ALL it's worth and learning as much from it as I can and applying it to my life. Starting with Eric. I no longer want us to be blase about what we have together.
No more taking it for granted.
No more NOT absorbing every single iota, nuance and THING I can of him. We used to hold hands EVERYWHERE we went.
He used to put his hand on my thigh driving in the car.
We used to write each other really loooong "notes".
We kissed each other and said "I love you" with as much meaning as two people ever meant it.
We sent e-cards and bought real ones constantly. But, in these years we've been together, life has intruded, work has made us "tired", excuses were issued left and right for the "newness" having worn off. Well. No more of that. I've often heard people say you have to WORK at a relationship.
Eric has too.
We've never understood that, because for us, being together is easier than breathing for the most part. We've been of the Tanya Tucker School of Thought... "If it don't come easy..." something is wrong. And, it has been easy.
Easy to lose that newness.
So, if there's to be "work" done, that's what I'm gonna work on. Re-creating and maintaining that closeness, that newness-feeling. We can do it, too.
It's still there, it's just buried under a buncha shit that doesn't really matter. I see that now with these eyes that Rob rrriiipped open for me. I don't want to lose one single second, one single ESSENCE of Eric anymore. I always have known, been hyper-aware, some might say, of the fleetingness of life sometimes.
Been called "paranoid" and "morbid" for my awareness of it at times.
Told I "love too much". Well, peoples, y'all ain't seen nuttin' yet. Best part? Eric is the exact same way I am when it comes to that.
AND, he understood completely when he came in for breakfast and I was washing the dishes with my Chicago CD blasting, then burst into tears when I looked at his sweet face. He rushed over and held me and I let myself lose it for a minute, then I said to him, "I'll bet ya don't know why I'm crying..." He said, "Of course I do. Rob." "Well, yeah, but that's not the only reason..." Then I told him what I just told you.
And, he understands. Sweet man that he is, he doesn't think we've grown all that far apart and I love him even more for that, but he also understands what it is I mean and why it's so very important. He always has understood perfectly well what Rob means to me.
He knows how much I love that man and why.
Therefore, it's easy for him to understand that I want what's happened now to mean as much as it can, to be the best lesson I can learn from Rob. Rob will NOT have gone through what he went through in his life and death for naught. WE, together, will see to that. I think Rob might even like that.
That one of his many legacies is a man being even more appreciated and well-loved and treated. That a woman is going to even more closely examine and watch her reactions to a man and monitor better her expressions of love, irritation, caring and occasional exasperation. I do love Eric.
So very much. Just like I love Rob, albeit in a slightly different, more "personal" way. And, I'm not going to let opportunities and chances to express it go any more, not for any "reason". No more taking Eric, his love and what we have together for granted. There's a speech in the play "Our Town" about "knowing every minute". That's what I want.
To know every minute I have with Eric.
To be AWARE of just what a precious gift his love is every single minute God allows me to have it. Kinda the way I wish I'd done more with Rob. I knew from the git-go how extraordinary he was.
I knew how unique and what a God-sent gift knowing him was.
But, I held back a lot of times.
Didn't comment, didn't call, didn't email.... I didn't want to be a pain in his ass. I stayed in the background, at times, quite a bit.
To HIM, directly, I mean, so pick your jaw up offa the floor... *smile* Yeah, I "protected" him as often and as well as I was able, which turned out to be not so well after all, huh? But, to Rob himself, I just wanted to let him know, if I could, what he meant to me and that there are some women unlike those he'd given his heart to. And, I think I managed to do that.
But, I dearly wish I'd called him more often and emailed him more and things like that. And, I will not feel this way about anyone I love ever again.
Especially Eric. I don't love a whole lotta people, hell I don't even LIKE a whole lotta people, but those that I do love will have NO DOUBTS ever again as to how much.
I'm not gonna have any doubts about whether they know or not, either. Not after this.
Not after losing a man who means as much to me as Rob. There may not have been anything I could have done to stop this and there may not be a whole hell of a lot I can do now to help Rob's family. But, I can do this.
And, to honor the memory of one of the most special people I've ever known, I will.
Posted by: Stevie at 11:05 AM | Comments (18) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
June 26, 2006
He's still doing it...
Now I know.
I did what I needed to do and found out for myself.I talked to Cat after that and knew that it's for real even more, though I didn't need to know it even more.
But, I could hear it in Cat's voice when I told him what I'd learned and from who. Then, just so people wouldn't see the last post and think I still wasn't accepting it, I did a post, told the rock-bottom truth too, but... I had a few qualms about it and when they were confirmed, I put it back to draft. That almost pissed me off, too. Rob was all about telling it like it is, as all the "drama queen" screamers now know.
And, yes, I do hope y'all are happy now that he called your bluff(s). But, this isn't about you.
It never was.
And, it never will be, for me at least, ever again. So... here I am.
Shocked by what I was told, but not really.
Pissed about my "truth" post, but not really.
Starving, yes, really.
Wet from being out in the rain, bringing in my horses.
Covered in bits of hay and all sweated up from cleaning and re-bedding stalls, running water buckets and hay to the boys and hungry, in spite of the fact that the facts should have left me with no appetite. But, I had a coupla "Eric-made" chili dogs and still I sat here, in front of my computer. I deleted the link to Gut Rumbles from my personal tool bar. It was the first thing, after email, that I clicked on every day and if anything will make me accept this, not seeing it there will. I'm waiting for Paul to call.
He said he would when he gets home from work.
Right now, I'm thinking he must work 400 miles from where he lives.
But, my perception of time, area and space and such is gone. It seems like HOURS since he told me he'd call soon.
Maybe it has been.
I don't know for sure. All I know is that I needed to do something and cleaning the friggin' house ain't it. And, I sure as hell don't feel like reading "Rob's dead, Rob's dead, Rob's dead" 84 million times, nor do I care to dive into the cesspool of public sentiment about it to maybe find a diamond or two. Not worth it.
Most of the few things I have seen were enough to make me ill. So, instead, I started near the top of my blogroll and started reading... Curmudgeonisms
Bane
(I thought I didn't wanna read about Rob? Well, these are okay. They're in your blogroll and the subject matter changes after the first few inches. Carry on...)
Cat
Crazy Aunt Purl
Dad Gone Mad
Everday Stranger It's while I'm reading her and thinking about him that it hits me... I'm not ignoring this.
It wasn't "bad" of me to actually have hunger after finding out for sure... not after I'd busted my ass taking care of the horses and I hadn't eaten all day.
Besides...
Those chili-dawgs Eric made were GOOD, damn it. I'm reading Helen and when I get done and close the window, bringing me back here, it hit me... I wouldn't BE here, if not for Rob.
I'm not blowing this whole thing off by going on, by reading other people who don't know Rob from cream cheese, by reading things that aren't about him. What I'm doing is letting Rob do the very first thing he ever did for me all over again... saving me.
Showing me that there's a whole wide world out there and it's okay to be a part of it. I'm using the most precious gift anybody ever gave me.
Reading these bloggers I have 'rolled.
Writing in my own blog.
Blinking back (and away) the tears of WHY I need to be doing this right now, while I wait for Paul to call and listening to Garth Brooks sing a song for Rob in my head that explains to me why it's all okay...
The dance we shared 'neath the stars above
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end, the way it all would go.
Our lives are better left to chance. I could have missed the pain.
But I'd have had to miss the dance
I really do. I just wish, more than I have ever wished for anything in my entire life, that I could have returned the favor you did for me. I wish I could have saved you, too. But now... there's only one thing left to do and I mean to see that it gets done. I promised him I would. And, I will. God, I wish Paul would call.... I love you, Rob.
And, I'll miss you so much I can't even conceive of it, let alone articulate it.
But, I'm glad you don't hurt anymore and never will again.
I know that's all you wanted.
But, my hand to God, I wish there could've been another way to achieve it. Peace, Acidman.
Posted by: Stevie at 09:59 PM | Comments (9) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Not til I hear it from Cat...
and on my cell, directly into my ear. Posts and emails can be... fabricated.
I'm about to start making some phone calls to some agencies down there who would know, one way or the other, for sure. But, as of right this minute... nope.Posted by: Stevie at 04:54 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Bloody hell...
I'm saying that for two reasons, not the least of which is that I really had no plans on posting here anymore because of all the bullshit that keeps happening with the comments and whatnot at Munu and also because THANKS to all the bullshit that keeps happening to the comments, I've missed a SHITLOAD of them because they weren't being emailed like they're supposed to be, if they were able to be posted at all.
I don't know, honestly, which it is I'm more thoroughy sick of... idiots fucking things up at Munu with that Godforsaken Blacklist and provoked DDoS attacks (which isn't me, before someone retard suggests THAT again, I KNOW who keeps begging for that shit, the fuckin' jerkoffs) or the inhuman MORONS infecting Rob's comments like the AIDS virus on crack.(And, the reason I think the ones causing the DDoS attacks are jerkoffs isn't because they're so obviously pissing somebody off with whatever they're saying, it's because they're doing it THERE, where the results of their pissing people off affect innocent people's blogs too, who have not one frickin' nickle in it. THAT makes them jerkoffs, because they know it's happening AND that they're the cause of it, yet they don't have the class to go somewhere else, where the only one who'd be affected by their horseshit would be THEM, the dickheads. And, let's don't even get me STARTED verbalizing my feelings for the dicksnot-brained doofuses with that damned Blacklist... ugh.) Having to put up with any more shit from the parasites at Munu (and y'all KNOW who you are, too) will be solved soon and the "bullshit score" at Rob's is: One down, one to go. Now, about these comments I missed...
(And, fuckall, am I PISSED about that....) Starting on about the 21st, things went to shit.
I think that was the last day that I was able to be aware of comments as they came in. On the 22nd, under this post, I missed Delftsman3's comment, because, apparently, after I'd answered Chablis, the comments got fucked again. So, D3, you sure nuff can "join the club" and I do appreciate it. I've been putting up with her shit for way too goddamned long and it's nice to know that not everybody is under her grinding thumb.
She's a goddess like I'm a fuckin' PRIEST. And, I'll getcha the blockquote code from Paul.
He knows about that kinda stuff, not me.
And, SEE?
If I'd have KNOWN about these comments any earlier than about five goddamned minutes ago, I coulda already had it for ya because I just got done talking to Paul for about two and a half hours tonight. I did a second post on the 22nd, that I also missed all the comments on after I'd answered Cat. In between those two posts is yet another post giving notice that the comments were once again fucked.
Then, it was updated saying they were fixed.
What it failed to mention was that it was only gonna be for about a friggin' HOUR, if that, apparently. Then, on the 23rd, after this post, I tried to answer Chablis and AGAIN discovered to my RAGE that the goddamned comments were AGAIN fucked. Apparently, they were working for about 90 seconds on the 24th, as I saw Chablis' comment to this post from the 23rd, but, by the time I tried to answer her, pffft AGAIN. Still on the 24th, after the post right under this one, I tried to comment after Spork did, but once again COULDN'T. So, I shot off an email to the person who is gonna solve this for me very soon FOR GOOD and went the fuck to bed in a high state of pissoff about the whole thing. I was hoping to GOD that when I woke up I wouldn't still be pissed, but apparently, I was. (Most of which is in the comments...)
I went the fuck OFF finally, after putting up with this shit for far too long.
I'm kinda thinkin' that if I'd have said something sooner, or each and every friggin' time this shit happened, I wouldn't have blown up like I did... And, let me say again, right here, right now, that I in no way blame Pixy for alla this endless horseshit.
It's not his fault.
It's the fault of a buncha fuckin' morons all dickin' around with the Blacklist as if they know what they're doing when they OBVIOUSLY DO NOT, as if, when dickin' around with the stupid Blacklist they're not fucking things up for EVERY-GODDAMNED-BODY, when, in fact, THEY ARE. The times you can't get here at all?
The fault of certain assholes who say the kinda stupid shit that provokes DDoS attacks.
They fuckin' well KNOW they're doing it, too, but they don't care, the parasitic fucks.
Being hosted for nothing, causing MAJOR problems, knowing it and continuing to do so. Sounds a lot like some of the chucklefucks in Rob's comments these days. At least the last three parts of that do.... After I freaked the fuck out over at Munu, I decided "fuck it" about posting here anymore. Plus, I was busy, wasting my time, trying to reason with another buncha dickheads in Rob's comments.
Under this post, if ya wanna see it... pack a fuckin' lunch, I'm tellin' ya now. BUT, I am happy and more relieved than I can say that this shit, all of this shit, will be over soon. One of the two biggest fuckholes at Rob's has been plugged and the other will be dealt with also. And, real soon, it's not gonna matter to me who fucks up what at Munu anymore. Well, actually, I already don't care about that anymore.
I got kinda distracted from it by the shit in Rob's comments, then by the time I got my attention swung back over to this pile of crap, it's already on it's way to being solved for good. MEANWHILE, I still haven't quite finished the house yet.
Not too hard to understand that when it's me against what seems to be the world (or a whole buncha creatures) messing it up, huh? I wash dishes and before I'm done, here's some more.
I do wash and before I can get it done, there's more. My hand to God, it's worse than trying to have alla the cat boxes clean at the same time. Ya just can't do it. By the time ya clean the last one, the first ones are already "used" again.
It's endless.
A vicious cycle.... *sigh* BUT... I'm also happy to report that I've finally found a suitable replacement for Ephedra. Which, while keeping me from being hungry and giving me energy, is also exacerbating the symptoms of my stupid period, which is here again yes, and yes, I'd still rather have a friggin' BEARD than deal with this crap.
Plus, I think the raw nerves from the Ephedra-type shit and my period are not helping in the slightest when it comes to not reacting to the cretins at Rob's. I'd already decided that enough is too damned much as far those douchebags are concerned and, frankly, now that I know it'll be handled, I feel even better, even if I do still sound "annoyed". I am. Just by virtue of the fact that alla that mess happened at all in the first place. And, I also still think that Pixy is being taken advantage of and being run into the ground by a few thankless clods over there at Munu and several HUNDRED turds screwing up the works with the stupid Blacklist. Meanwhile, one of my favorite cats just had to find a way to get behind/under the non-working, non-mobile, stationary-under-the-countertop dishwasher to have her kittens, resulting in us having to pretty much disassemble the damned thing to get her and them outta there.
Thanks, Chicky.
I needed that.
NOT. Fuck man, I didn't even need anymore kittens, PERIOD.
Ya know? And, now, I'm sitting here trying to type with my fat little tank-like
It has.
Everything is flooded.
Muddy, wet, icky, nasty.... Makes things soooo much better.
*rolls eyes* So, since my legs are falling asleep from the weight of this dawg and I can't half see the keyboard through his fat head, I guess I'm done now. Plus, the damned cat with the kittens is naggin' the fuck outta me to take her and her crew upstairs into my bedroom where she can alone, like that "I vant to be aloooone" actress-person. I shoulda never told her I'd do that "shortly".
Goddamned cat understands English and hasn't left me alone for five minutes since I told her that last night. Soon, Woman, soon... now quit meowing at me! Plus, if there's not some strawberries marinating in sugar for Strawberry Shortcake for later and maybe Eric's birthday cake baked soon, I think I'm gonna get lynched. Not to eeeeven mention, it would be nice to get the stupid house finished finally, which I ain't gonna get done sittin' here with a vibrating dog on me, am I? Amazing how the ballsey-est dog this side of the Mississippi can become such a wuss just because God decides to bowl a few frames. Anyway.... I'm outta here.
And, outta there, then outta here again, soon. Meanwhile... Peace, y'all.
Posted by: Stevie at 03:59 AM | Comments (4) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
June 24, 2006
Holy freekin' shit!!!!
I cannot believe I passed this test...
You Passed 8th Grade Math |
 Congratulations, you got 9/10 correct! |
I hate math.
Always have, always will. I had a pen and paper handy, but never even touched pen to paper. All I did was say the problems out loud to myself and I even know which one I got wrong... it was the one I went, "pffft, aw fuck you, man" to and guessed at. This one... # What's the value of (10-5)^2 + 12/4? * 9.25
* 28
* 222
* 103 I had no idea what the fuck that one was asking, but the rest of them, I just said out loud, thought about and... of all things... got RIGHT. Holy shit. My Dad sees this, he's gonna flip.
He's been telling me for years that math is easy, it's "logical" and it's always the same, every time ya do it. I, on the other hand, have wondered for years how you call something that's number-related that has LETTERS in it "logical". I took algebra in 9th grade.
End of the year, it looked like Mr. Catherman had stuttered "F" all the way down my report card. Dad says I got screwed as far as math goes because they'd just started with that "new math" shit when I was in grade school. New math? What was "old" math? All I know is I hated it, it was stupid, it made NO sense whatsoever and I therefore refused to deal with it. However, I also remember being in... had to be third or fourth grade because I was going to a different school in fifth... being in the school library, reading some random book.
Mr. Leslie, Walter Leslie, a teacher I had a major crush on, came over and when he saw what I was reading, he freaked because, apparently, it was several grades beyond whichever grade it was that I was in. He said to me, "Do you understand what you're reading?" "Yeah." "Okay, tell me what it says in your own words." So, I did. His eyes bugged. He grabbed another book, an even more "advanced" one and had me do it again.
That book, I remember, was about science and had a bunch of chemical names and technical shit in it and again, I read it out loud to him, pronounced all the words correctly, three-inch-long chemical names included, then told him, in my own words, what it meant. He couldn't believe it. He told me he had kids in his class who couldn't do that and he taught 8th grade, too. All I knew, or cared about, was that I'd made a teacher I loved proud of me and I never did lose my love of words and reading. Then, in my new school, in 5th, then again in 8th grade, I had another teacher I was halfway in love with, Mr. Mark Durand.
His brother Jim was another of my teachers and couldn'ta been more different than his brother, but, man... I'da married him too, if I could have. Mark looked like Ryan O'Neal and Jim had a beard, listened to Dylan and lost every staring contest we had. Jim taught 7th grade and was my homeroom teacher, too.
I "fell in love" with him the second I saw him.
Dark brown, long hair, beard, moustache, bell bottoms, Earth shoes, cool shirts... I know now he musta got stoned back then, but I didn't know it then.
I just knew he was "cute" and "cool".
I guess I must have stared at him a lot, 'cause one day, he pointedly started staring back, with a grin on his face.
So, I just zeroed in and kept looking. He blinked first.
Every time... *giggle* I think he musta figured out I had a crush on him and he was cool with it.
I think he thought it was cute.
I dunno.
I just know he never made me regret it. I heard several years ago that Jim had died.
Brain aneurysm, I think.
I was sad to hear that.
He was a good teacher, funny, nice and veeery patient. But... Mark... his brother... Had him in 5th grade, then again in 8th. He was the second (and last, I think) teacher I was proud to impress with my vocabulary.
Reading and spelling, both. We used to have weekly spelling tests in these little brown notebooks we'd hand in after the test for him to grade and return for us to study with and take the next test in. I started telling Mark jokes in mine. I'd ask the question at the bottom of my test, then turn the notebook upside down and write the punchline at the bottom of the page.
I made him "work" to get the answer... He really thought that was funny. He seemed to enjoy it, between my stupid jokes and my straight A's. But, I don't remember any math teachers except Mr. Catherman and that was because he looked like a caricature of a high school algebra teacher, kinda like something you'd expect to see on Southpark. Dark-haired flattop, horn-rimmed glasses and a goatee.
He always wore a dark suit, too.
Plus, he had that Tourette's problem with my report card and all...
Kinda hard to forget a guy like him. I think the only thing that impressed him about me was that I showed up every day in class. But, it wasn't his fault I didn't get it.
I'd already begun my hatred of math years before.
Wasn't gonna be anything he could do about it, really. So, all my life so far, I've avoided math when at all possible, but... I can spell anything and my reading comprehension and vocabulary and such became my forte by default. In fact, now that I'm thinking about it, I can also remember a female teacher I had... Linda Birdsall, I think her name was, who first told me I have a photographic memory for things I read. I know it was a Beatrix Potter, is that her last name?, book about Ramona Quimby and her little sister that I quoted word-for-word in an oral book report in front of the class. I had the book in my hand, yeah, but it was open and facing the class so I could "illustrate" with the pictures in it when I quoted it. And, Mrs. Birdsall KNEW I'd only just read it for the first time earlier that day. It was one of several new books we'd gotten in class and we had to tell why we'd chosen it and what we thought we were going to like about it and when I quoted it after having already read the whole thing in just a short while (while most of the other kids were still just looking through theirs), she nearly shit. I didn't even realize I'd done anything "special" til I saw the look on her face. She asked me if I had that book at home or had read it before and I said, "Nooo."
I thought I was in trouble for a second there... She said, "Wow... you have a photographic memory..." I was like "Okay." whatever that meant....
*giggle* If I'm not mistaken, Mrs. Birdsall was also the first teacher, or person, to use the phrase "scatterbrained" on my report card. Something along the lines of "very smart, could be an excellent student, but a little scatterbrained".
*lol* Yeah... a "little".
(So, see? I come by it naturally...) So, here I am, a 43 year old who is thrilled to have scored a 90 on an eighth grade math test. I truly could not believe it when that test score came up.
I was expecting to see "What are you, in PRE-SCHOOL, bitch?" as the result.
Not 9/10 correct. Jeez. Imagine if math had clicked in my brain when I was in school....
If they hadn't fucked with this "new math" shit at exactly the wrong time... Oh well... I'll take my natural love of and skill with words any day. There's no way I coulda "mathed" my way outta hell with Xfire.
It was writing and words that did that.
With Rob lighting the way. So, yeah...
It's been worth it.
Being a math-moron who loves words is VERY worth it. I'm glad to have spent my life with people like Stephen King, Lewis Grizzard, Robert M. Smith and the other truly talented minds that I read and whose footsteps I've walked in or at least followed. I shudder to think of spending a life alone with math, in all it's dryness and sterility, with alla those "rules" you have to live by.
That woulda sucked, big time. Mighta paid more, but... I still wouldn't change a thing. So, thank you Dad, for instilling in me a love of words and reading, Mr. Leslie and Mr. M. Durand for being well spaced and timed "booster-jets" in that love of words and Stephen, Lewis and Rob for giving me such inspiring examples to aspire to emulate. Y'all are wonderful company to be in.
And, LOOK Y'ALL!!!!
I got a friggin' 90 on a MATH TEST!!!!!
Posted by: Stevie at 01:50 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
June 23, 2006
Coupla semi-related things...
Now that I've upgraded to the latest version Of Mozilla, I can finally answer Chablis next time she asks me what browser I'm using... It's the latest version of Mozilla!
(Smart, ain't I? Pft... Well, at least now I know...)
Actually, she tried to get pissy with all three of us, me, you and Rob. In an attempt to spare ya's having to deal with her, I answered her for all three of us.
I think I was pretty clear and covered all the bases, but you might wanna make sure?
I dunno....
But, I saw it, Rob'll get the comment as an email and I didn't want her to get away with sniping at your back without you having a "head's up". I firmly believe the only reason she got so lippy is because it's an "old" post by now and she didn't think we'd actually see it. Stupid bitch...
*lol* And, the kid is fine.
He apologized for fuckin' up and not telling anybody and for his subsequent attitude.
And, I told him it's okay, he'll be back soon and everything will be fine.
(But, I still reserve the right to be relieved there's one less person to clean up after and put up with and nobody here now whose age isn't a double digit.)
(And, no, I didn't tell him that part, I'm just sayin'...) And, actually, since George hasta go to Joisey this weekend for his parent's anniversary party, there's only three of us here right now.
So, that's cool.
Maybe now I'll be able to FINALLY FINISH cleaning the damned house and bake a cake. I've only got three mixes and it was Eric's birthday a few days ago... And, now he's sitting here, burning holes in the side of my head, waiting for me to finish this and go get him some Copenhagen.
Yet, on the otherhand, he also keeps engaging me in conversation with him and his son, so that's not making this any faster.... HOWEVER, I do need to mention one other thing, if for no other reason than to let Rob know this shit CAN work out right... Junior is staying.
Not just for another few weeks and not even just for the summer.
He's three months away from his 18th birthday and he says he's NEVER going back.
Period. Thank GOD, he made it.
His mother didn't get to make him kill himself, like she did her first kid, she didn't get to break his mind, like she did her daughter and, once we get done not lying to him about the shit his mother has said and done over these years, he's probably not going to want to expose himself to her influences anymore, EVER. Not to even mention ending the child support horseshit. Now, all we need is to either be patient or hire a lawyer...
Posted by: Stevie at 06:31 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Okay, so just what in the hell is the deal with idiots from Gloucester, NJ and my goddamned bathroom?
First, I have some toothless, brainless Hagatha try to burn the damned house down by setting the bathroom on fire, followed shortly thereafter by a cat-induced flood.
Now, it's an 8 years oldI also did NOT tell him to climb on top of the dryer and do ANYTHING with the bleach, NOR was he asked, told or supposed to shut off the dryer, thus delaying the drying of the load that was in it. BUT...
that's EXACTLY what he did. And, do ya THINK for one fuckin' SECOND he had the balls to come TELL ME (or anybody else) what he did?
WHICH was just gone over in GREAT DETAIL not two days ago? Oh, fuck no.
Of COURSE not, the little sumbitch.
And, do ya THINK he fuckin' LIED ABOUT IT when confronted?
Ohhellyeshedid. God, I can't WAIT til he's gone. He'll be allowed back, sure, unlike Hagatha, but...
there's a DAMNED good possiblility he'll be DRIVING HIMSELF back.
Posted by: Stevie at 04:07 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
62 cats? Pft....
Das' nuthin'... compared to this.
And, it's the NUMBER, not the species, that's making my hair crawl....Posted by: Stevie at 01:59 PM | Comments (0) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Have ya ever....
been reading a guy's archives, trying like hell to remember the name of his former dog and as soon as you read an unrelated post that mentions an "oddball storm front", you heave a huge sigh of relief because that's the dog's name, Oddball, then you think to yourself, "Oooh, I want a piece of watermelon", probably because said guy also mentioned them somewhere that you happened upon once you got absorbed into his writing and started more reading his archives than looking for the damned dog's name and then you go out to the fridge and grab the leftover HAM instead?
Me neither.Posted by: Stevie at 12:16 AM | Comments (0) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
June 22, 2006
You stupid, stupid cuntbag... what the fuck is so hard to understand about "Bring it over here"?
Christ on a STICK, you are STUPID, Tessa.
Stevie: I'm more concerned about stereotypical, young women such as yourself who try to ingratiate themselves to men by running to their defense when someone asks them a valid question.First of all, the LAST thing I am is ANY kinda "typical", which is probably what the majority of your problem is with me.
Second, the day you ask a valid question is the day hell's gonna be a Frigidaire dealership, you fucking TROLL. You even admitted that Chablis' telling you to step off and quit playing the victim when you got called on your sarcastic bullshit was an "honest critique", so how is it now a "valid question" you asked? Then, you tried kissing Rob's ass by ADMITTING to him that you were being a sarcastic cunt.
And I quote... "Acidman, I apologize for being sarcastic. I jumped to a conclusion based only upon what I read in one paragraph. I wish I had asked in a different way.
*snort*
Yeah.
That worked out really well for ya, didn't it?
You'll notice he ignored that...
(And, don't worry... even if you did fail to notice that, the rest of us didn't.) For not liking "ass-kissing hypocrisy" you sure as fuck do enough of it, as we'll soon see. Again. And, just what "advantage" am I trying to gain by "bringing myself into Rob's favor"? (The literal definition of "ingratiate"...)
I just don't like seeing people like you fuck with a guy whose been kicked around enough already.
Rob doesn't need your shit.
Nobody does. Further, you'd do better by concerning yourself with YOURSELF than with me.
It is very, very important that you look inside yourself and understand that you cannot transform a man's opinion of women (yourself in particular) by pretending to 'understand' their psyche's. You really must give up this approach before you run out of gas.Believe me... I do not want to change Rob's opinion of women because he is 100% correct about the majority of them. Like YOU.
And, I don't have to pretend to understand their pysches, either.
I actually DO understand men better than women.
Always have, always will.
Probably yet another thing about me you just cannot stand, huh?
Bet another one is that in the ENTIRE TIME I've been reading Rob, NOT ONCE has he felt a need to jump my ass like he did yours. And, as far as changing men's opinions of "myself in particular"?
Why would I want to?
I get along wonderfully with most all men (jb being an exception that springs to mind, because I think you two are twins... at leat y'all ACT like you are) because I'm not a typical cunt-like woman.
It's WOMEN who have the mental inability to "handle" me, just like you and Joan.
And, I'll never give up "this approach", because it's not a premeditated situation.
It's who I am.
I was born with it.
So, I'll never "run out of gas", like you keep doing when you eventually get beat down, like in Livey's comments that time.
If all else fails and you don't see the flaw in your approach, maybe he'll give you a go at that bionic toy of his, and you can learn the hard way when he announces his conquest to the world by telling everyone how he FUCKED you too.".....you too." Me too? Ya mean like he did Joan? Joan, whose ass your were so recently kissing, you hypocrite? Again, I quote... "Now see there? Joanie has class."
(Sorry Joan... had to make a point there and since there's no "friendship" to speak of or jeopardize between us, I went for it. That's Tessa's horseshit, not mine. And, since you didn't seem to mind her using you to bash Rob, I'm sure you won't mind me using you to bash HER. Right? Good.) Was'sa matter, Tessa? Got your crotch in a knot just because Rob has never alluded to having sex with you?
He has me, several times.
I think it's sweet of him, to tell the truth.
He never fails to make me blush and giggle when he says that.
Further, if that ever did happen, he wouldn't treat it like he has with others.
That's mostly because I'm not LIKE the others.
Rob already seems to know that very well and if he had any lingering doubts, he wouldn't after that, lem'me tell ya.
That way, you can sit in the manure pile in the pasture of life and feel sorry for yourself and wonder what the hell happened.Again, are you referencing Joan?
Jesus, why don't you give her a break?
I don't particularly care for her myself and yes, I did finally stand up and state my opinion about a few things earlier after YEARS of just "letting it go" on the advice of another MALE friend of mine who also knows her, and after she engaged me first in Rob's comments, but, jeezus man...
You admitted you don't know "Rob's past", which means you don't know Joan either, OR what even happened back then, so why are you saying this shit that reflects more on her than me? And, can we expect even MORE ass-kissing hypocrisy when you try to back-pedal your way out of this, too? (Hey Joan... better go get a towel. Your ass is about to get SOAKED in Tessa spit...)
I have a lot of compassion for people who try to better themselves, but I have none for people who are in denial and use those weaker than themselves to live off their pain and goodwill. I've lived much too long to feel sorry for the manipulative, self-pitying crybabies they become when their abusive ways don't work.What? Who the hell are you even TALKING about here?
Me?
Rob?
Joan?
Who? After reading that insanity about 12 times, I've come to the conclusion that it must be Rob.
It would be just like you to say most of that shit about him.
ESPECIALLY considering that you know NOTHING about his past, as you said.
And, if that's the case, you again managed to bash Joan by calling her weak.
It sounds like you're saying that Rob took advantage of Joan's "pain" of being a single mother and used that and her "goodwill" of flying across the country to see him to live off of.
I've lived much too long to feel sorry for the manipulative, self-pitying crybabies they become when their abusive ways don't work.
It quite obvious that this is what you think of Rob in general anyway and are you accusing him of "abusing" her by not not marrying her, or something? What is the fuckin' POINT, there?
Once again, your pretentiousness is getting in the way of CLARITY, Poindexter.
Why the fuck don't you just say whatever it is you mean, instead of trying to sound like some frustrated, wanna-be work social worker?
With any luck, you'll live long enough to reach that point in life.No fuckin' WAY.
The instant I see myself becoming at ALL like you is the day I'll kill myself.
Trust me.
Rob says he welcomes diverse opinion. He got it. So far, he hasn't deleted my opinions.Noooo.
What he got was a sarcastic cunt being a smartass, in this case.
And, I bet ya wish he HAD simply deleted your comment instead of humiliating you like he did, don'tcha?
Idiot.
I respect him for that, and I don't recall him asking for help. Silly girl, you.Pfffft... *lmao*
Posted by Tessa at June 22, 2006 11:48 AM
That's what you call respecting somebody?
You're fuckin' DELUSIONAL.
You specifically DISrespected him, which is EXACTLY why I POLITELY told you to fuck off. I don't recall him asking for help. Again, you display your GLARING ignorance when it comes to Rob.
If he's said it once, he's said it a thousand fuckin' times... He wasn't raised to "ask" for help.
Besides, a friend (which I'm pretty sure you have none of) doesn't wait til you're in a position to have to ASK for help.
They give it without being asked, you frickin' BONEHEAD. And, you call me silly? Well, okay.
I can be that, I hafta admit.
(If I didn't, I'd have 93 people callin' ME on that... *grin*)
(Right Glen, Paul, Mad Wm., etc? Right.) I'd rather be willfully silly than a clueless windbag cunt any day. Floor's your's, Fuckhead....
Posted by: Stevie at 01:47 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Comments are fuckin' fubar again...
Goddamn it.
As of 8:15am EST, it seems Munu comments are fucked again.SO... if you try to comment and get a string of bullshit, you'll know why. *siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh* (By the way... WHY is my post time an hour off?) Update 10:25am...
Comments have once again been fixed and to whomever fucked up the Blacklist this time... EAT SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Stevie at 07:22 AM | Comments (0) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Youse wanna play? We'll "play" and I'll beat'chas to death with your own words, too....
Jesus friggin' Christ, women are fuckin' NUTS, ya know that?
Drive me up the goddamned wall with their petty horseshit.
(And, we alllll know how well THAT goes over, don't we?) She tries, and FAILS MISERABLY, to compare Rob repeating what people already have known about for YEARS with the recent betrayal of confidence he got put through. Almost at the same time, Rob and I both call her on it.
He a little more graphically than I, but... whatever.
Same message, just different words.
(And, for the record Joan... if I'd been trying to fuck with you, I'd have put it more like Rob did.) Then, she back-pedals, trying to cover her own ass, but again... fails.
"Not everybody who reads your blog knows your past..."
That's what archives are for, you asshole. (Not to mention, it's not like he only covers a subject once...)
Try READING them, you stupid bitch.
That still won't give you the right to fuck with Rob, but maybe it'll spare you from making such a cunt-like asshole of yourself so often. Then, she decides, since she got nowhere with THAT, to give me grief about the way I spell when I write, WHICH I already explained to her non-information-retaining stupid-assed self before.
Besides, how is it that Jett Superior, Lil Toni and ROB all do it too, but I'm the only one she notices?
Jealous cunt much?
(Not to even mention the fact that, while I suck at and detest MATH with every fiber of my being, I can, do and always WILL be able to spell shit other people can't even PRONOUNCE, IF I so choose, which I don't, so fuck you, you moron. I'd rather get the point across with some personal "flavor" to it than show off using "lawyer-speak". That's just pretentious, much like you TESSA, and I hate pretentiousness...) Then, Chablis knocks her on her stupid ass too.
(You go Chablis... wish I could be as concise with as few words as you are, but once I get goin'... *rolls eyes at self*) Anyway, the Tessa-Troll then further proves what a stupid fuck she is with her next comment.
The whole goddamned thing is just... ridiculous.
She says she can't handle hypocritical, ass-kissing crap while she's got her lips firmly planted on Chablis' ass. (Sorry about that visual, Chablis...) The only thing that stupid cunt can't handle is ME.
Which I find highly satisfying and more amusing than I can say. Then, unfortunately, Joan (who was at least ASKED to contribute by Rob) chimes in and instead of focusing on what Rob asked her, or Tessa's using her as a club with which to try to bash Rob, or even Rob's bluntly stating the obvious (as he so often does and which I think I admire about him the most), she chooses to address me first, again because of some stupid, ingrained reaction to me and, in the process, contradict herself a few times and since she did that, here we are. *disgusted sigh* She didn't talk about it? Is she fuckin' SERIOUS?
God, I hope not. Anybody who has read Rob for a coupla years, or any number of other blogs whose comments Joan used to frequent, knew allll about what went on.
It was made perfectly clear by things she said, asides, little "hints" that were approximately as broad as the side of a BARN, her attitude and such. In fact, I started blogging right as it was starting between her and Rob.
I CLEARLY remember emailing her and asking about me emailing Rob for some reason and her outright LYING to me about what his reaction would be. I forget what I wanted to ask him or say to him, but it was clear from what she was saying about him at the time that it'd be the equivalent of messing with some chick's boyfriend to approach Rob without her "consent".
So, I talked to her first. She said he'd either fisk or totally ignore me. Which didn't happen. And, WHEN that didn't happen, she got pissed and decided to hate me, just like 99% of the other insecure females with low self-esteem I've encountered in and since high school. Fine.
I'm used to that. In this particular comment of hers, she says first that she didn't talk about it.
That I "imagined" it. Riiight. Okay.
Then, it the NEXT SENTENCE, she says she and Rob DID talk about it, only she tries to make it be different by substituting "talk" with "joke".
It's the SAME THING.
It was being verbalized, whether it was by "talking" or "joking".
It was NO SECRET.
Kinda hard to hide flying across the fuckin' country.
(And, if memory serves and believe me, when it comes to Rob, mine does, it was also kinda hard for her to accept it for what it was and that that's ALL it was.) Her: Our blogging while on vacation together led to much speculation and very little confirmation. Rob: (in a prior comment in the same thread) Yeah, we FUCKED!!! No confirmation, huh?
Jeezus...
I reeeeally don't think Rob would have been so blunt if it weren't considered "common knowledge". Her again: Now? No worries. Water under the bridge. If he doesn't mind talking about it, why should I?
More like: You didn't mind talking about it THEN, why should it bother you NOW? And: I have no archives anymore.
Well, just because you lost the archives doesn't mean it didn't happen, that your talking about it didn't exist. Hell, I even remember what happened with the guy after that and her.
"Ran screaming" about covers it.
(Yeah, I used to read him, too. Want me to say his name? Not to mention that when I commiserated with him in an email or two, he said he wasn't going to get into it, but that I was on the right path, more or less, which I already knew by then.) Once I got a handle on the kind of person Joan REALLY is, I quit reading her. And, that was years ago.
That's why I wasn't aware that she'd "lost" her archives. And, for the record, it wasn't ME who decided to be a bitch first.
Or since.
Do you even want me to go into the "Anton" shit?
I don't think so. Y'all don't even want to know the number of times I've had guys tell me that they don't wanna get embroiled in her shit when it comes to me. To a man, they ALL said that she'd already informed them that she won't have anything to do with them if they had anything to do with me. Yeah. I kinda KNOW that.
From what I gather, she goes around telling men she wants to keep to herself (meaning: that she doesn't want being friends with me) that I'm "some kind of psycho", I think was the predominate phraseology. There've only been three guys with the balls to tell/show her they'd be friends with whomever they damned well pleased and they are Rob, Paul and Mad Mikey.
And, maybe they didn't say it that way, but, they also didn't run with their tails between their legs, lest they piss off Queenie. And, ya wanna know the truth about the rest of them, like Anton?
It was their loss, not mine.
I favor men over women and eunichs not at all. Now, if you "ladies" would like to continue this bullshit, y'all go right ahead and do so HERE.
I will NOT waste Rob's bandwidth on either of you dipshits anymore.
Posted by: Stevie at 06:15 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
June 21, 2006
Lose one critter, get another, I guess...
There's been this one kitten, out of the "way too many" cats I have, that's needed some special care, lately.
She started out okay, then, it became obvious that she had some kinda problem with her eyes.Then, I figured out she was blind, period.
Then, she started to get sick.
No idea what ailed her, but we started with the canned food, a blanket/nest and extra attention. As recently as last night, while I was watching two shows in a row about demigod (2nd definition) JOHN LENNON (I just said that to make Mad Wm. barf *weg*), she was eating and when I ran my hand down her back, her little tail went right up and she was purring. I come down here this morning and there she was... dead. Fuck what? Maaaan.
Shit. I lost it, naturally and then, a few minutes later, just as I was saying, "If this is any indication of what this day is gonna be like...", Tiger comes in with his hands cupped and says, "I think I found a guinea pig or something..." and hands me a MOUSE! Damned tiny guinea pig... *lol* Unlike the tiny baby mouse he found the other day, this one is "of age". Fully grown, has hair and was cool about being in human hands. So, anybody wanna guess what I did with him? Stuck his furry hiney in a cage I happened to have hanging around, empty, and decided that it IS true that God doesn't slam a door in yer face that he doesn't open a window somewhere... OR, He may let your cat die, but He'll give ya a mouse. Told ya's He's more twisted than I am. Then, I got to talk to Glen for a while. And, he sent me a picture, BUT... he asked me not to post it, like the mystery Pumpkin-Carving-Man did, so I won't , plus it's bigger than this whole page, so I couldn't anyway. Then, I finally got my new Mozilla profile to accept Yahoo as my homepage and restored all my stored-then-lost-with-the-new-version-of-Mozilla passwords. It's amazing the shit you can find to do to avoid cleaning the house, ain't it? Oh, and Chablis... that needledick in Rob's comments from the other day did it again.
Since you hadn't commented, that narrowed it down to either me or Rob and I called him (a pussy) on it.
I've got his "bitch", right here.
Know what I mean? Anyway...
I reeeeally need to go clean.
I have needed to clean for the last coupla days, but...
frankly, I don't feel like it. But, it's obvious by now that these dopey cats ain't gonna clean nuthin', so I guess I'd better.
However, if they all worked together, they could have the whole house done in about an hour, as opposed to one person (me) doing it alone, which'll take about as many hours as I have cats. *rolls eyes* Oh well...
I'll be back after I get done.
See ya's in about 2009. Peace
Posted by: Stevie at 06:06 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
June 20, 2006
I hate my three outside dogs right now....
I was just outside, cleaning out the duck's (kiddie) pool and while I had the water running, I watered the ignorant fucking dogs.
While I was doing that, I happened to notice a dead baby opossum in the dogpen.
Then, I noticed two more.
I hate all three of them now. I radio-ed George and told him what they'd done and that if they're gonna get fed ever again, it's on HIM, because as long as they're killing baby anythings and wasting what they kill, they can kiss my rebel ass. So, Ziggy, April and Jessie... fuck y'all, you baby-killin' fucktards. (I do ever s'much HOPE you "I'll kill a dog for killin' MY animals" dipshits are noticing that I'm not KILLING my dogs for what they did. I am merely passing on the feeding of such ignorant fucktards to another person who happens to OWN one of the ignorant fucktards. And, yeah... I am sitting here, bawling as I type, over the senseless killing of those babies. I'm pissed at 'em, but I'm not blowing their heads off and incinerating their bodies like that dickhead LARRY SHROCK did to that poor beagle, Jake. AND, that poor beagle didn't even KILL anything.)
Posted by: Stevie at 03:01 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Alright, damn it....
I suddenly remembered where the stupid preferences are and so far, I've set Yahoo as my homepage about 37 times, but the fucker won't "remember" it.
I click okay after I set it, it (the window) disappears then I click on "home" and...
nuttin'.
It just sits there.
SO, I go back into the preferences and TAH-fuckin'-DAH, it's blank again.
Anyone?
Bueller?
Posted by: Stevie at 12:12 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
rg" in the browser search bar and tried changing it that way, too.
My browser is being a dick...
My stupid Mozilla browser is refusing to open for reasons know only to itself and, maybe, God.
I've downloaded the latest version of Mozilla and it's on my desktop, just waiting for me to get done "rescuing" Rob's words and get on with it.But, I wanted to get that done first, even though I hadda do it IN IE- ewew-ewewew.
I hate IE... Anyway, now that I've got that done, I'm about to commence upgrading my Mozilla. SO... if I completely disappear or break the entire Internet, Paul will be home from work later to he'p me fix it. Meanwhile, in case you missed Rob yesterday, have a peek at the next two posts.
By the time ya get done reading it all, I oughta have shit done... *grin* Update @11(according to my post time, it's really an hour
later than it thinks it is. Probably oughta fix that, huh?):45pm...
Well, DAMN.
That was fast AND, it works!!!
Only problem is, it doesn't know that Yahoo is my homepage and I can't for the life of me remember how to get to the preferences thing. I can picture it, but I can't find it.
*exhales thru nose- HARD* *and now wiping off upper lip* If anybody knows how to find this elusive "preferences" thingy, couldja let me know, please?
Thank you, thank you ver' much.
Elvis is going back to cleaning now (as opposed to "leaving the building"). Update 19 seconds later...
Never mind.
I found it.
Looks like Elvis is gonna be setting preferences THEN cleaning the house. (Though I think the whole "leaving the building" thing is a much better idea...)
Posted by: Stevie at 11:22 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Be careful whatcha wish for, Lovey...
In my EP, I have the posts that you deleted, Acidman.
Unfortunately, I couldn't "save" the links, but I do have alla the comments...
Posted by: Stevie at 10:47 AM | Comments (0) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Rob's posts....
PART TWO!!!!
(Not sure why, but the last coupla posts and comments wouldn't "fit" in the other entry, and now I'm gonna re-arrange the times and shit to make this shit make sense...)
Posted by: Stevie at 10:46 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
June 19, 2006
I know I'm fucked up, but...
There are just some things you DON'T FUCKIN' DO TO ME.
One of the top ones of which is DO NOT SHUT MY FUCKING ELECTRIC OFF FOR SOME STUPID FUCKIN' REASON WITHOUT LETTING ME KNOW. Motherless fuckin' GOD, I hate that. That's because it leads directly to another one of my "will get your head punched down inside your stupid neck if you to it to me" things... scaring me awake. You scare me awake and I promise you, no Nam Vet will treat you worse for it than I will.And, it's not some simple punch to the jaw with me.
You scare me awake, you make me feel freaked out and sick, and I will harass, harrangue and ultimately HURT you. Even if it takes all damned day. I don't like it.
I don't do it to you.
DO NOT motherfuckin' do it to me. Can ya guess somebody did that to me today?
Cocksucker. It's fucked up enough that I'm all backwards again with the whole sleep deal.
I didn't even go lay down til after 6am.
Then, less than two hours later, I suddenly wake up to no air conditioner, no fan... a silent, electric-less house. And, no it has nothing to do with having the bill paid, because that goes with Eric's job. So, I got suckered into believing that I'll never have to do deal with this shit again.
Which makes dealing with it again all the more "WTF?!!?". Seems some non-drving DICKHEAD tore down a wire with a fuckin' hay rake.
(I don't even know how the FUCK you manage to do that...)
So, NATURALLY, the thing to do is race over here, go into the fuckin' basement and just shut off OUR electric for no reason and leave it off while you stand around with your fuckin' thumb in your ass, discussing what the fuck to do next. WRONG! Here's what ya do... First, you bitchslap the asshole who tore the wire down.
Then, YOU LEAVE ME THE FUCK OUT OF IT.
If you simply must get your tiny dick hard by playing "God of the Fusebox", then you get your stupid SHIT together FIRST. You do your discussing, your standing around, your posturing, your gathering of tools and supplies and alllla that shit before you go shuttin' off MY shit especially when I didn't fuckin' cause it.
Further, if you'd like to have a nice day and not to have to explain to everybody how some stupid little woman beat the shit out of you, you TELL ME FIRST. So, now I'm awake, SCARED awake, with about two hours of sleep and a goddamned kid running in and out every 49 fuckin' seconds who is about to get CLOTHESLINED by my arm if he doesn't chill. (See, when I get scared awake, then pissed off about somebody else's stupid shit that I had not one nickle in til I got drug into it, shit that's normally "irritating but survivable" becomes "irritating and I'll kill you", which is about where I am right now.) Granted, I do have an assload of shit I need to get done... cleaning, grocery shopping, not murdering somebody with my bare hands... shit like that.
Only problem is, now that I feel sick and pissed, the only one I even feel like doing is the last one. Best thing these people around here can do is just LEAVE ME ALONE for a while. Stay the fuck outside.
Don't call attention to yourself.
Don't be annoying, which includes but is not limited to breathing near me. Or, breathing at all, which if you'd like to retain the integrity of your airway to be able to do, just PISS OFF and leave me be for a few hours. This is especially true if you are under the age of 40. Or, if you're the fuckhead who turned off my electric without warning me. Or, if you're a human being, pretty much. Animals, as always, are safe from my wrath, unless they do something to directly deserve it.
People? Not so much.
People, having been the cause of 99.99999999999999999999% of the misery in my life, can, do and WILL catch shit for lookin' at me wrong on a day that starts like this one has. This is so not a good day for people to be stupid around me now.
I mean, I always hate that, but today, it could get you seriously injured, thanks to the fucktard who shut off the electric. And, yeah... it's back on now and/but they didn't even fix the fuckin' wire, so exactly WHAT was the reason for shutting my shit off, waking me up, scaring me in the process, making me feel sick and pretty much fucking the whole day now thanks, in the first goddamned place? Can somebody explain that to me, please? *crickets* Yeah.
That's what I thought. *several temple-massaging moments later* God. Okay. Now that I've gone off and spewed venom in a one mile radius around my present location, allow me to point out two things that prove I'm not completely insane and in fact, am maintaining my equalilbrium rather well, thank you ver' much. I have no weed to level me out nor any real hope of getting any any time soon.
I also have no other kinda Lude-like shit around here to shut my demons up.
This, added to the shit I've dealt with the last five days, added to this morning's clusterfuck, added to the fact that I have yet to actually kill anybody yet is rather amazing. I am also currently following Chablis' lead in (not) dealing with a possible asshole in Rob's comments. Both she and I commented on a post Rob did about a comment I made on a post he did about pig's feet.
Some fool calling himself "Tomcat" also commented and called somebody a bitch.
WHO he is calling a bitch is not clear.
Could be her, could be me, could be Rob.
I don't know.
But, the fact that I've not torn his balls off for the insult to whomever is also amazing, because he IS asking for it, no matter which of us he's referring to.
BUT but, she said nothing about it to him, so neither have I. Yet. In fact, a coupla of the other commenters on that post have displayed SUCH stupidity... and yet, I've let it slide.
I think I've decided that anybody who is so fuckin' STUPID that they don't know the difference between shit being spread on TOP of a field for fertilization and something being stuck in pigshit for a coupla years is just too fuckin' stupid for me to waste time on.
Also, (other) MORON, there is also a difference between DIRT and pigshit and if you don't believe me, come on over here and I'll stuff your big mouth fulla both, one at a time, and you'll SEE the fuckin' difference, you bleeding idiot. (And, fear not.. if you're not bleeding right this second, you WILL be when I'm done with you...) Yes, I know I just veered off from Chablis' lead, but... at least I did it here and not in Rob's comments.
That's something.
And, believe me, it's better I relieve the pressure that's threatening to make my head explode here, rather than shove some fuckin' asshole off the road with the pushbars on my front bumper.
Or repeatedly run over some asshole with a full shopping cart.
Or take a Pusser Club to somebody around here.
Or find a rifle, scale a silo and start making the world a better place. Know what I'm sayin'? Any-fuckin'-way.... It's been over 12 seconds since the (dopey) kid has run in or out.
This is good.
The electric is on.
This is also good.
I am not twins.
This is so good that there are no words for it. So, on that "up" note, I guess I'll get a grocery list together, go to the stupid store, clean the stupid house and just keep my personal contact with
Just pray they can run fast enough if they simply MUST be retarded.
Me and "running" do not play well together, so any stupidity I have to contend with had BETTER be of the "drive (or run) by" variety. Back later (if I can find a way to type whilst in a straight-jacket, if people have their way today, seemingly). Peace?
*rolls eyes*
Posted by: Stevie at 10:22 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
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