November 22, 2004

Life Lesson #2,214,769.5

14 or so cats under the age of one year, together can approximate the damage done to a house to that which is done in a cabin by one "playful" bear cub.

Just thought I'd letcha's know that.

Posted by: Stevie at 08:07 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Just gotta remember what's really important....

I'll re-arrange my schedule, I'll try to re-learn habits I've had since I was 17. I'll even overlook, as much as possible, blatant stupidity, but... I will NOT let this job (or any other ever again) become my life. I will not let this (or any other) shit stress me into a heart attack or fists.

I'll care, but not too-overly much.

It's just a job.

It's not the be all end all of waitress-hood.

Know what I mean?
S'okay.
I do.
*giggle*

Sure this shit is important, but it's not life and death, nor will it ever be.

Wanna know what IS important?

Home. Here. This chair, this machine, these stupid cats (don't ask, they're gettin' on my dick nerve right about now...lol)... all the shit that matters to no one but me is what's most important.

I don't mean that egotistically, either. I just mean it in a practical, everyday way. Same way I don't know or really care about anybody else's "life" from the diner, I don't expect mine to matter much either, except to me. So it shall.

This life. This place. These people.
Not those. Not all the time. And, if anyone wants to ask me to choose, don't- if you're "of" the diner, cause you will NOT like my answer.

(Jeezus. Am I about to PMS-y again? Is it time? I kinda wondered that the other day when I melted down in the diner. Now, I'm about to start a rousing game of "handcat" with one of these pooping fuzz balls and this other shit I'm coming out with is about to make me cry and I have NO earthly idea why... lol. And, I'm laughing at it at the same time. When, that is, I'm not screaming at/lecturing the TV for eating another tape or threatening the can opener and oh yeah, it's starting it's shit, too. "Duuuh... how do ya op'n a can again?" With a hammer, you fuck. Same thing I use to do "surgery" on YOU.... bitch. *rolls eyes* See what I mean? It's either PMS or schizophrenia and yes there are a few tiny differences.)

Any-friggin'-way....
I go in again today. I already know, because BL told me that I'm gonna have a station of two tables and she said and I quote..."Just keep to yourself, don't worry about anybody else's shit, just get good at the ordering..."
Okay. I can do that.
Especially the "stay to myself" part. Hell, I like that part....

All this is, this time I have to be away from here where I wanna be, is a way to make being here even more cool and no, not because I'm not here... that's not what makes it cool, so just shut up, Comedian-trapped-in-my-brain.
I'm gonna do this other insane shit just so things can be better here. BUT... I do NOT wanna get caught in that mental-toilet-swirl of "have to". I HAVE TO do that for Eric, or HAVE TO do that to validate my existence or some dumb shit. If I do that AGAIN, it's gonna beat me down AGAIN, just like it usually does. I get all twisted up over "I hate this and I don't wanna do this anymore, but I HAVE TO or I'm a big, fat, pussy loser who Eric oughta run screaming from, blah blah blah." I get pissed when I'm "there", wherever "there" happens to be, and I get bent here, too, because this is all why I HAVE TO go back to Hell. Then, it gets into "I can't even escape Hell by going home, because all I'm surrounded by there are "reasons" why I HAVE TO do this again... ugh"

I lose sight of what's truly the important thing and get all bunged up and walk.

It doesn't have to be like that, either. I know that. There IS a balance and I will find it and IF it has to be just a little "not perfectly balanced", it's gonna be tilted in "here's" favor, not "there's".

Basically, I don't need to and I'm not going to get all stressed out over shit at work. That's not what's the most important at the end of the day (or any time, really).
AND, I don't need to get all stressed over shit here, because I seriously doubt Eric would "fire" me, nor will he become 3 Italian cooks who yell and act scary and have access to knives. (And, if they aren't all Italian, they may as well be for the "Godfather" vibes they generate...)

All I can do is try my best. And, I will. And, my "best", if I can get to it, will be kickASS. BUT... it's gonna be my own personal definition of "best". I'm not gonna compare myself to every other waitress in the world and feel inadequate. I mean, damn, every waitress alive has a weak spot or two. I can't be "perfect", nor do I wanna be. (I like M&M's waaaay too much for that. Yeah, I know... "What da fuck does that mean?", right? Okay, lem'me 'splain, Lucy... I don't wanna be "perfect" because the only "perfect" person I've ever heard of was Jesus and with those holes in his hands, how can he eat M&M's? They'd fall through, wouldn't they? Well, that's just ONE tiny reason why I'm certain that "perfection" really does actually suck... Hey. It works for me, okay? lol)

In the words of the immortal (to me, anyway) Tincup, "Perfection is unattainable." He's right. True perfection is non-existant. John Bender: "It's an imperfect world. Screws fall out..."
Yeah, I know that last part didn't really fit here, but it made me laugh...

Okay... so I hafta go in today. I'm also going in Tuesday, but I'm off Wednesday and Thursday, so that's what I'm gonna look to first as a "release valve"... that I will be off soon. Then, if need be, I intend to focus on my "important shit", which includes, but is not limited to:

My real life.

In which, yesterday, while I was working and after I got home, cool shit happened.

While I was working, Eric and Rob got a LOT done on the stalls, then went to the Quakertown Farmer's Market and Central Tractor. Hung out and had a blast. *grin*
Then, when I got home, first off, I finally had some fuckin' CASH on me, then, I got some more. THEN, I got to go grocery shopping and I made steaks, mac & cheese, aparagus, corn, garlic limas, nuked potatoes and corn muffins for dinner for the three of us while the guys went riding.

Now, THAT was cool as all hell.

Then, I went to bed sometime before 9p, got up at around 4:30a and here I am.

Speaking of which, I need to wrap this up so I can get my kitchen back in shape before I go in.

See, that's how I'm gonna do this. I'll be working mornings, but I'm gonna live 3 to 11.
In other words, when I go to work, it's gonna be "late" enough in my (personal) day to seem like "afternoon" to me. Then, when I get off, I'm gonna come home, make dinner and go to bed, pretty much. Get up at anywhere from midnight to no later than 3am and start over. Get my shit done, relax, be able to wake up as slowly as I need to to not feel sick, ect. Then, I go in, after already having been awake for several hours, when I'm at the peak of my albility to handle shit, then come home, wind down, go to bed, repeat.

And, Goober-Boy just came in here and dropped off the usual LOAD of shit-stained thermal cups for me to wash, so now I've really gotta go if I wanna be able to do this shit I just described.

Pray for me, people, okay?
lol...
Thanks. *hugs alla ya*

Peace

Posted by: Stevie at 06:42 AM | Comments (6) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

November 21, 2004

Have a little irony... it's good for your blood.

Okay, so I spent the last three days on "the floor" of a restaurant, in uniform as a waitress, without making a dime in tips, right?
I go in today as sort of a "hostess assistant", more or less, dressed in regular clothes, hair down and all, and some guy slipped me a $2 tip because he thinks I got him seated quickly.
*snerk*
God is so funny that way, sometimes, ain't He?

Then, even MORE ironic was the Boss Lady today.

Posted by: Stevie at 05:06 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

November 20, 2004

Swiped from Mad Wm... or traded for a hug or two... *grin*

Your Superhero Persona by couplandesque
Your Name
Superhero Name	The Scotsman
Super Power	Ability To Breathe Underwater
Enemy	J-Lo
Mode Of Transportation	Motorcycle
Weapon	Computer Parts
Quiz created with MemeGen!

Your Superhero Persona by couplandesque
Your Name
Superhero Name	The Bankruptcy Lawyer
Super Power	Can Cry On Command
Enemy	The Ex-Girlfriend
Mode Of Transportation	Scooter
Weapon	Vinyl Records
Quiz created with MemeGen!

Your Superhero Persona by couplandesque
Your Name
Superhero Name	Mullet Man
Super Power	Ghetto Booty
Enemy	Frozen Corpse Of Walt Disney
Mode Of Transportation	Volkswagen Beetle
Weapon	Computer Parts
Quiz created with MemeGen!

These all made me giggle and I like how motorbikes and computer parts show up more than once.

Thanks, Sweetie!!!
I always appreciate a twisted sense of humor.
*wink*

Posted by: Stevie at 05:58 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Muuuuch better...

Oh, man.
That was great. Just what I needed. I just needed it too much to realize it.

It's kinda chilly and sorta rainy, but, ya know what? Didn't matter. When Rob asked about going riding, I threw on a pair of jeans... yes, JEANS, not sweats, for a change... *grin* and went. First time I've been on Storm in jeans and my harness boots, too. Usually I wear sweats and my work/John Bender boots.

We went thru the woods, out into the hay field and then let them graze while we talked about shit. Gave 'em a drink in the stream and came on back. Rob's got Jessie, the third horse, out in the yard now, letting him graze for a while too.

I'm about to change into sweats and cook chicken for dinner for all three of us. After I get it done, I'm gonna "secure" it all (from the cats) and go to sleep. I am beat....

Plus, I hafta go in at 7am, so I oughta get up at, like, 3am, if I don't wanna feel like shit by the time I get there.

Ya know?

Peace, y'all...
(I think I found mine again, too, by the way.)

Posted by: Stevie at 05:25 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Well, apparently what I'm gonna do is have a major fuckin' meltdown all over the Boss Lady....

Jesus Fuckin' Baldheaded CHRIST!!!!
What the fuck, ya know?

Yeah, I'm pissed. Can ya tell?

Posted by: Stevie at 03:00 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Shit. Only thing in my head right now is that song "Gim'me some money..." from "Don't tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead", but what the hell kinda title is that?

Jeez...
Got a lot to get out and it's all stuck behind "What do I call this, for Pete's sake?"

Aanyway...

Posted by: Stevie at 07:57 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

November 19, 2004

I think I'm gonna like this place....

There is absolutely no point in me even trying to remember, sort out or explain 90% of what happened yesterday morning.
There was just soooo much... wow.

But, I'll do the best I can with what I do recall... probably woulda been a little easier to be cognizant of shit, if I'd actually slept any, but... we know me, right?

Posted by: Stevie at 12:48 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

November 18, 2004

I am such a dipshit, I swear...

Here it is, 2:15am, or so and am I asleep? Am I doing anything remotely "normal" the night before the first day of the new job?

No.

I, the obssessive, insane dickweed that I am, am cleaning the got-damned house.

I don't know why, really, this matters so friggin' much, but... it does. I'm positive that I'll be lots more comfortable and focused, despite the lack of sleep, if I know the house and all those indigenous to it are "handled".

Plus, coming home to a clean house is always nice.

Still.
I am fuckin' fried.
Not sleeping... Christ.
*shaking head*

Ah well... back to it.

Peace

Update @ 6:45am...

Done.
Everything here is done.
Laundry, dishes, catboxes, vacuuming and mopping, even.

I feel lots better.
I'll feel better still after I get a shower and wash my hair.

I still can't believe I'm actually "going to work".... (giggle)

Thanks again, Big Guy.
*wink*

Posted by: Stevie at 02:18 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

November 17, 2004

Okay, so it's gonna wind up being "interesting" first....

Fine.

(And, just by the way, I totally heard the word "interesting" in Bugs Bunny's voice, when I thought it. You remember... when he's doing that big orange monster with the sneakers' manicure? He draws it out, kinda... "Iiiin-ter-resting". Yeah. That's gonna be what it is, first. I can tell already....)

As hard as the store manager argued and as pissed as he still was at them when I "ran into" him in the store Tuesday, "Corporate" said nada.

*shrugs*
Oh, fuckin' well.
NEXT!!!!

(Which is just about what I did, too.)

Posted by: Stevie at 04:04 PM | Comments (9) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

1 CONGA RATS!

This is the one with the ties?

Now what would be funny is we knew where it was and did a random drop in.

Posted by: Mad William Flint at November 17, 2004 06:03 PM (/j9KS)

2 Good for you Stevie!!

*high fives the computer*

*picks computer up off floor*

Posted by: Mad Mikey at November 17, 2004 08:39 PM (ysS8l)

3 Ah yes, the ties. I used to work at an establishment that required those. Now I just wear what I want, so much nicer in my opinion. A push up bra, low cut top, red lipstick. Yep, works every time!

Posted by: Maeve at November 17, 2004 09:16 PM (6E1RR)

4 Mad Wm, yes Lovey, the place with the ties...

Mad Mikey... lmao... Dude you are just too adorable for words...

Maeve, if I had that kinda body, I'd do that, too, but ain't no point trying that til I get back into my 29" waist jeans... (which'll probably be about, what?...a month?...after I die? *giggle*)

Posted by: Stevie at November 17, 2004 09:38 PM (sosrQ)

5 A little OT, but for the first time in many, many years, I dropped below 200 lbs on Monday.

(Of course, it was after sucking about 3 kilos of garbage out of my bloodstream....)

I'm gonna have to get new jeans soon....probably 33" or maybe even 32"....

Posted by: Mad Mikey at November 17, 2004 10:09 PM (ysS8l)

6 WOOOOOO!!!! You go girl!!!! That's awesome - I'm so excited for you!!!!!

Posted by: AmyVegas at November 18, 2004 03:38 PM (iS3EV)

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November 15, 2004

God Bless Juan Valdez*....

(*And, his donkey...)
And, whomever invented Coffeemate.
Without them, the process of becoming conscious every day would suck.

And, I'm actually pretty fond of the Folger family product, too, so God Bless them too, although He sorta already has, what with the amount of money they make offa the stuff.
Well, except for that whole episode with Abigail, that is. What? Manson is a Maxwell House drinker, or something? I think he shoulda switched to Sanka, myself, the hyper little shit.

Any-friggin'-way...

Posted by: Stevie at 03:41 PM | Comments (9) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

November 14, 2004

With the holiday season just started in it's mad dash to crush the will to live out of all of us, let me be the first this year to say...

Posted by: Stevie at 02:51 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

November 13, 2004

This one gets it's own post...

Would ya lookit the ARMS on this guy?

My GOD!!!

*fanning self rapidly*

This man is fuckin' AWESOME.

Posted by: Stevie at 11:56 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Dear God,

In my next life, could I pleasepleaseplease be this particular piece of metal, used in exactly the same capacity on exactly the same guy?

Thank You ever s'much.

Love,
me

P.S...

Posted by: Stevie at 11:26 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

1 Love ya Stevie. But that post just goes from bad to worse. I just don't see it.

Posted by: Mad William Flint at November 14, 2004 02:12 PM (9oivZ)

2 That's a nice pair of pants.

*Off to go collapse into a wet puddle next to the 'puter.*

Posted by: dawn at November 15, 2004 10:27 PM (Rgkju)

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But, of course...

Less than 10 hours after I put these nailtips on for the first time since about last February, I get "the call".

Posted by: Stevie at 03:35 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

November 12, 2004

Well, good then...

Hair is done.
It came out pretty good. And, that's in this lighting. Can't wait to catch sight of it in the sunlight.

I've got the house at 99.9%, now. One small load of dishes are waiting for me and there's a load of laundry drying, but other than that, everything else is done.

I even have my fingernails prepped and the nailtips all laid out and ready. If this goes as easy as it used to, I may make cookies again, before I go to bed.

We'll see.

Anyway... before I get too comfortable sitting here, I'm gonna keep going and get this shit done.

'Nother thing... I wanna go watch the news real quick. Seein' as to how I haven't heard from nor seen Mad William yet today, I'm assuming his Internet/phone/cable shit fell through. I'm thinking he may just show up on the news holding some stupid installation tech hostage or picketing someplace nekkid or something. Bet after this, he changes his name to Pissed-da-fuck-AWF William, too... poor guy.

Peace, y'all.

Updated @ 3:00 am...

Nails are done now, too.
Typing is real fun.
But, now I can scratch my head from across the frickin' room again.
Daaamn, these things is loooong.

Anyhoo... I think the cookies are gonna hafta wait.

It just occured to me that I might have a hayride sometime tomorrow.
Be nice if I went to bed, huh?

Yeah, probably.....

Peace.

Posted by: Stevie at 10:59 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

What an excellent rainy day this is turnin' out to be....

Man.

First off, I GOT THE CARPORT DONE!!!!! Thank you, Jesus...
I feel like I finally got my "kid's pigsty" cleaned, like my mother used to do in my bedroom every so often when she just couldn't take it anymore, and I love seeing the Bird parked in there all safe and dry and outta the weather.

Second...

Posted by: Stevie at 01:04 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Jesus. The title alone was enough...

Remember when I told you this guy is fried?

Well... here's proof.

I am never gonna be able to look at a cow the same way again.

Posted by: Stevie at 01:01 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

1 Aw, now, Stevie... it's not *all* cows. Just the black-and-white spotted ones.

Come to think of it, maybe there's a dalmation in my pants. Would that be better, or worse? Or just gross?

I'm only asking.

Posted by: Charlie at November 12, 2004 01:49 AM (NvvRt)

2 Oh, fear not. The black and white spotted ones are Holsteins, which is the number one milk cow breed in the US and our primary breed.

And, I'm looking on the bright side, or trying to... For instance, it's already occured to me that if I ever have to speak in front of a large group of cows, I won't be nervous because I'd just be thinking about them being in your... er, I mean THEIR underwear.
Or something.

*giggle*

Posted by: Stevie at November 12, 2004 02:03 AM (m1EM+)

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I took a peek at the Site Meter and this is what I found...

1 unknown
2 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
3 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
4 http://madmikey.mu.nu/
5 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
6 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
7 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
8 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
9 http://gutrumbles.com/archives2/001249.php
10 http://www.gutrumbles.com/11 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
11 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
12 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
13 http://www.gutrumbles.com//
14 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
15 http://search.earthlink.net/se...rthlink-ws&q=what+crickets+eat
16 http://www.gutrumbles.com//
17 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
18 http://www.gutrumbles.com/
19 http://www.davetepper.net/
20 http://www.thequestingcat.com/blog/archives/00000051.html

This is in less than about 45 minutes.
And, only the first page.

"Acidbath", "Pappy-lanche"... whatever ya wanna call it, I love 'im for it.
Thank you for the link, Love.

Posted by: Stevie at 12:06 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

November 11, 2004

Thank you, each and every one of you...

And, you guys...

Posted by: Stevie at 01:26 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

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