May 03, 2006

Gas Prices

Well, gas around the Citadel is averageing at around $2.84 a gallon, with only the prospects of furthur rises in sight. The chickens of inane past policies have finally come home to roost, and our current crop of polititians are arguing only over more of the same.

The latest proposal from Dennis Hastert includes a $100. "rebate" to be given to every family to "help them over the hump". EXCUSE ME?!? Given the increase in the costs of all goods due to increased costs of production and transportation absorb that paltry amount faster than a drop of water falling on a hot rock under a desert sun. It's an insult to any logicaly thinking person.

Another part of the proposal resolves to change the tax structure on oil company reserves; effectively imposing a huge tax increase on those companies....and increasing the cost of doing business lowers gas prices at the pumps how? It's bad enough that the general populace should be so ignorant of economics, but for a supposedly highly educated man to pursue such a course is
bordering on the criminal.

Prices are a function of supply and demand, and for at least the last twenty years, the government has fostered policies that served to limit domestically produced supply and making us hostage to the vageries of a volatile Middle East and/or South America.

The Politicoes are trying to blame the oil companies for "gouging", citing "record profits"....and with an uninformed populace, they are getting away with the scapegoatism yet once again. The numbers on the profit side of the ledger do look high, but when you delve into it and determine the profit margin after expenses, you will find that oil is among the lowest returns on investment of any commodities. And when you realize that the GOVERNMENT'S
"profit" from a gallon of gas in the form of taxes is between four and five times higher than the profit realized by the companies themselves, we need to ask ourselves just WHO is doing the gouging.

Government has restricted the oil companies from developing most areas of domestic production; made it economically impossible to increase our refining capabilities for the last twenty two years,mandated "special blends" that increase the cost to the consumer and have made the costs of marketing and distribution much higher than need be.

While some practices of the oil companies are reprehensible, what the government has done is even more so.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 09:12 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

May 01, 2006

Austin was Awesome

Well, I just got back in the door after a 2125 mile round trip to the Austin Blog Meet. Erin and I both had a GREAT time (even though I still couldn't talk Erin into doing a little range time, she opted to check out some of the retail facilities).

Special thanks to Beth for bringing the wheell chair; it sure came in handy! And extra special thanks to Lord Spatula for increasing my armory by a much needed easy carry piece.

Erin and I had a special adventure on the way home...we drove all those miles, and had an accident only 44 miles from home.

We had just crossed the Indiana state line and were doing splendidly, when for an undetermined reason,(NO I did NOT fall asleep at the wheel, and I have a witness to that!) the car decided it wanted to violate the rules of highway travel and attempted to move laterally instead of a forward motion, taking us over a 15 foot embankment....it then decided that lateral WASN'T a smart move and attempted to move foward over the head sized chunks of limestone in the drainage culvert at the bottom of the embankment. I did manage to keep enough control to keep it from flipping, and neither of us was hurt, except for some hard bumps and bruises. I managed to drive the car out of the culver and up the embankment back onto the highway, but the right front wheel was cracked and the tire was losing air. no way of telling what damage may be hiding on the undercarriage. Erin is covered by AAA, so we just had ourselves towed to the dealership; we should find out the total extant of damage sometime this evening or tomorrow. I really dreaded that call to my Ex to tell her that her car almost got totaled, but wasn't that bad, really....She took it all in stride; her only concern was that neither of us was hurt. I stood there and cried in the dealers lot...I had expected to have to try to run as she atttempted total evisceration on me for damaging her beauty, but instead, I got a hug and a "don't worry about it; thats what insurance is for".

I'm going to take a hot shower and then sleep for about 20 hrs or so, talk to ya'll when I return to the land of the concious.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 08:05 AM | Comments (8) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

April 25, 2006

The Ugly Baby

Hot Air.com has the lowdown on just WHAT an ugly baby our border policy is and how it became that way.

Spew alert is in force on this one, so don't send me any bills for ruined keyboards if you fail to heed it.

H/T to Jack

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 04:22 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Doctors Orders, Sweetheart!

Seems that Dr. Karen Weatherby carried out a five year study in Germany on the health effects that ogling a nice set of mammary glands can have on old dogs like me.

Her conclusion?: a ten minute ogle at a womans breasts is as healthy as a half hour workout in the gym. She stated that a "few minutes a day could cut the risk of stroke and heart attack almost in half", and that by "consistantly engaging in this practice, an average man could extend his life by as much as five years"! "There is NO question that gazing at breasts makes men healthier".

So the next time you want to go out on the town for a night of leering with the boys at the local "gentleman's club", just tell your wife that your doing it to improve your health and longevity. (Hmmm, I wonder if this could be considered as a medical expense by my HMO....)

UPDATE: Per request of one of my favorite citizens, I added something just for her under the fold.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 04:11 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Rememberance

Today is a special day...it's Holocaust Rememberance Day in a number of countries (unfortunatly not observed in the US).

This is the day set aside to remember all the victoms of the Nazi atrocities during WW2. It's a day of special meaning to me, as my own father was almost a fatality of those atrocities...as it is he was a victom of experiences that no human being should ever have to undergo. It's important to remember that ordinary human beings are capable of such bestial behaviour if we are ever going to reach the point that it will never happen again.

Dad was interviewed by Rev. James Dobson in two segments of his Focus on the Family radio program last week. I learned quite a few things about my father I had never known prior to listening to this broadcast. Use the link and go to the archives for April 24 and 25 to hear it for yourself.

I hope that after you hear it, you will try to delve more deeply into that period of time and learn more about what happened, and even more importantly, WHY it happened. As my Dad noted, most of the people involved weren't monsters; they were ordinary people in extraordinay times and under pressures that many of us of the baby boom generation and beyond can't even conceive of in our nightmares.

Oh, and it's also my birthday; and getting to gain some insights into my father through this broadcast was one of the best presents I've ever gotten.

52 years young. Battered and bruised, but still ready to fight the fight.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 02:45 PM | Comments (13) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

April 22, 2006

Turnabout is Fair Play

Mexican Constitution, Chapter 3, Article 33:

"The Executive of the Union (The President) has the exclusive right to expel from the national territory, immediately and without necessity of judicial proceedings, all foreigners whose stay it judges inconvenient. Foreigners may not, in any manner, involve themselves in the political affairs of the country."

Now match this legality to the words of Vincente Fox:
)President Vicente Fox) was quoted on Dec. 14,2005, as saying the United States’ attempt to secure our southern border by building a wall was “shameful and disgraceful.” Fox also said the U.S. action was an “increasing violation of human rights.”

Media reports on Dec. 21 quote Foreign Secretary Luis Ernesto Derbez as saying, " Mexico is not going to bear, it is not going to permit, and it will not allow a stupid thing like this wall.”

Hyprocracy isn't a stranger in the course of politics anywhere, but at least most U.S. polititians at least try to hide it (Kennedy exempted), and are often discarded at the next election when they are found out engaging in it...

The strangest thing to me is that groups such as La Raza are blatent in their goal of "taking back" a large portion of the American south-west and creating a new country known as "Atzalan", yet they bleat about their "rights" whenever they are confronted on anything. And that fact isn't stressed in any of the major media...after all, if you try to point out the hyprocracy of hiding behind "rights" while attempting to overthrow the basis of those rights, you'll be labled a racist, and that just isn't the thing to do in todays PC culture.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 11:50 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

April 21, 2006

My Dad

HERE is just ONE reason I'm proud of my dad.

He never talked about his childhood with us when we were growing up, except in the most general terms; it's only in the last two years that we have started to learn just some of the horrors he endured as a boy.

His main message is that we can never allow such horrors to occur again, and that God (HOWEVER you should choose to believe in him/her) is the only thing that can help you endure such experiences with (at least a semblance) of sanity afterwards. My Dad has never been religious, but he's always been a staunch believer in Christ and God.

There were many things I could never understand about my Dad when I was growing up, but now that I have begun to learn about his past, I can begin to understand him a great deal better. I'm glad he has broken his silence about the past, so I can, now that he's in the last years of his life, at least start to know the person he really is and why he is as he is before it's too late. Thats a gift that many children never have in their relationships with their parents, and I'm truly grateful for that.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 09:20 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Hizzonor Speaks

Having just read a fisking by the undisputed master of the genre, I feel compelled to try my own feeble skills at it too, albeit on an easy target.

Mayor Michael Bloomberg, an outspoken gun control advocate, said Friday there is "nothing wrong with people having guns" for recreational shooting, and even recalled his days as a Boy Scout marksman.

Be careful there your Honor..."seeing nothing wrong with guns" won't sit well with your fellow travelers on your side of the gun control issue, and I guess they didn't inform you that the Boy Scouts are a totally "Politically Incorrect" group these days; admiotting you were once a member in good standing might just hurt you with the "Progressive/(un)Reality Based" set.

Bloomberg is convening a summit of big city mayors next week to discuss what he calls the "scourge" of illegal guns.

Yes...."ILLEGAL GUNS" ARE a scourge. But Your side of the gun control debate just can't seem to apprehend the simple fact that guns are "illegal" when used by CRIMINALS, and CRIMINALS ARE CRIMINALS because they don't obey laws. You can try to make the guns the focus all you wish to, but unless and until you hold the CRIMNALS to account, with enforcement of laws ALREADY on the books, that "scourge" will continue unabated.

On his weekly radio show, the Republican explained that he still supports the Second Amendment and said he has no problem with hunting and target practice.

Thank you SO much for allowing us to assert our 2nd Amendment RIGHT...Your smugness can't be any more evident than in that statement.

"You want to go hunting and have a gun _ you know, I'm not opposed to that," he said.

Smugness reiterated? How gauche!

The 64-year-old mayor, who grew up in Medford, Mass., and occasionally refers to fond memories of Boy Scout camp, said he participated in riflery there and also owned a .22 caliber rifle for target practice on a shooting range.

WHAT!?! A young "skull full of mush" was allowed acces to a firearm?!?! Those camps you attended must have been straight out mayhem as depicted in some horror movies; after all, isn't it the contention of the gun control lobby that if citizens were allowed free access to fire arms that there would inevitably be a "Wild West" scenerio with "blood running in the streets"? What, you say that that DIDN'T happen, and you all had fun? HOW can this be?!?!

"I see nothing wrong with people having guns, but that doesn't mean you can have a gun every place, and concealed weapons _ or even weapons out in the open in big cities on city streets _ does not make a lot of sense to me," he said.

Hmmm...nope, I just checked, your honor, and there is nothing in the 2nd Amendment that says, "you may bear arms, EXCEPT when you are _______"
I see why it "doesn't make sense" to you, since from your standpoint, guns that are used for self-protection are, ipso facto, "illegal". Ever stop to consider that "illegal" guns are the biggest problem in those areas where the average citizen isn't allowed to own/carry a weapon?

Next week's gun summit will bring together about a dozen mayors, including those from Boston, Dallas, Philadelphia, Milwaukee, Seattle and Washington, D.C., to trade information and form a loose coalition for lobbying on Capitol Hill.

The other cities I understand, but Dallas?!? Hopefully those representatives from that fair city are attending just to let the other cities know just how full of crap they are in attempting to limit legal ownership/carrying of weapons they are. All the residents of my aquaintence from that fair city are definately on the opposit side of the issue from Mayor Bloomburg. Maybe he meant Austin?

"We want to talk about best practices, and how the mayors of all the big cities can get together and pressure Congress to do something about it, because it's a national issue," Bloomberg said.

Let's see "pressure Congress to restrict our 2nd Amendment rights".....Yep! JUST what I want MY local officials to do! Your correct in that this IS a National issue, Mayor. Just keep your nose out of it, YOU were hired to provide for YOUR city, not other cities.

My suggestion for "best practices"?

1) Provide supervised firing ranges for your citizens so that they may become proficient with their firearms. Training IS important.

2) ENFORCE those laws on the books pertaining to the use of a firearm in the commission of a crime.

3) Let the average citizen know that HE/SHE is responsible for his/her own protection against crime in the final analysis. "911" police response is a great concept, but the Police CAN'T, and NEVER HAVE been able to protect you at the time that a crime is being commited against your person, all they can do is deal with the aftermath.

4) Again, enforce laws against criminal acts involving weapons with severity and surety. NO plea bargains in gun charges.

We are all responsible for ourselves; no matter how much we may think we live in a society where that is not true, to deny that fact is to deny reality, let us have the tools to accomplish that goal of self protection.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 06:47 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Now THATS an Idea!

Kim du Toit for Press Secretary!

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 05:11 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Nannystate at it again

DAMMIT! Seems that the Republicans aren't just SPENDING like Democrats, but now they want to legislate like them too.

I can agree with the intent, but as it's proposed; it's just the first step on that old "slippery slope".

I think the same intent can be much more easily accomplished by just requiring that all porno sites use a new type of URL address....insted of ".com", require that they use something like ". por". That would make the use of protective filters against porn all that more efficient. Those that want to view porn would have unrestricted access, but Parents could ensure that their "little skulls full of mush" couldn't easily come across it.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 04:59 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Just a Little Humor

To get things started, here's a little humor I found in my mailbox... I hope you enjoy them like I did.

My Private Part Died Today!

An old man, Mr. Goldstein, was living the last of his life in a nursing
home.
One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed. Nurse Tracy asked if
there was anything wrong.

"Yes, Nurse Tracy," said Mr. Goldstein, "My Private Part died today, and I
am very sad."

Knowing her patients were forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, she
replied, "Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Goldstein, please accept my condolences.

The following day, Mr Goldstein was walking down the hall with his
Private Part hanging out his pajamas, when he met Nurse Tracy.

"Mr. Goldstein," she said, "You shouldn't be walking down the hall like
that.. Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas."

But, Nurse Tracy," replied Mr. Goldstein, " I told you yesterday that my
Private Part died."

"Yes, you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?"

You gotta love this!!!!!!!!!!!

"Well, he replied, "Today's the viewing."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A man scanned the guests at a party and spotted an attractive woman standing alone.

He approached her and asked her name.

"My name is Carmen," she told him.

"That's a beautiful name," he said. "Is it a family name?"

"No," she replied. "I gave it to myself. It reflects the things I
like most ----- cars and men." "What's your name?" she asked.

"Beertits," he said

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Subject: : USAF 2007 sight plan

Swearing at work

Dear Co-workers:

It has been brought to SECAF's attention that some individuals

throughout the Air Force have been using foul language during the course

of normal conversation with their co-workers.

Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily

offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.

We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to

accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers.

Therefore, a list of 18 New and Innovative "TRY SAYING" phrases have

been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and Information can

continue in an effective manner.

1) TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.

INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f___ you're doing.

2) TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.

INSTEAD OF: She's a f___ing bit__.

3) TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.

INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?

4) TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.

INSTEAD OF: No f___ing way.

5) TRY SAYING: Really?

INSTEAD OF: You've got to be sh___ing me!

6) TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...

INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a sh__.

7) TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.

INSTEAD OF: It's not my f___ing problem.

TRY SAYING: That's interesting.

INSTEAD OF: What the f___?

9) TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.

INSTEAD OF: This sh__ won't work.

10) TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.

INSTEAD OF: Why the f___ didn't you tell me sooner?

11) TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues.

INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a__.

12) TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?

INSTEAD FO: Eat sh__ and die.

13) TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?

INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.

14) TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.

INSTEAD OF: F__ it, I'm on salary.

15) TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.

INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.

16) TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.

INSTEAD OF: This f___ing job sucks.

17) TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?

INSTEAD OF: Who the f___ died and made you boss?

1 TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.

INSTEAD OF: He's a pr_ck.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

BILL AND HILL

When Bill and Hillary first got married Bill said, "I am putting a
Box under the bed. You must promise never to look in it."

In all their 30 years of marriage, Hillary never looked. On the afternoon
of their 30th anniversary, curiosity got the best of her and she lifted
the lid and peeked inside. In the box were 3 empty beer cans and
$81,874.25 in cash.

She closed the box and put it back under the bed Now that she knew what
was in the box, she was doubly curious as to why there even was such a
box with such contents. That evening, they were out for a special
anniversary dinner.

After dinner, Hillary could no longer contain her curiosity and she
confessed, saying, "I am so sorry, Bill. For all these years, I kept my
promise and never looked into the box under our bed. However, today the
temptation was too much and I gave in. But now I need to know, why do
you keep the 3 beer cans in the box?"

Bill thought for a while and said, "I guess after all these years you
deserve to know the truth. Whenever I was unfaithful to you, I put an
empty beer can in the box under the bed to remind myself not to do it
again."

Hillary was shocked, but said, "Hmmm, Jennifer, Paula and Monica. I am
very disappointed and saddened by your behavior. However, since you are
addicted to sex I guess it does happen and I guess 3 times is not that
bad considering your problem"

Bill thanked her for being so understanding. They hugged and made their
peace. A little while later Hillary asked Bill, "So why do you have all
that money in the box?"

Bill answered: "Well, whenever the box filled up with empty cans, I took
them to the recycling center and redeemed them for cash

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 04:46 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

1 I had a pretty good chuckle from "Beertits". So I stole it.

Posted by: Dave S. at April 24, 2006 06:25 PM (I15ul)

2 Dave, your more than welcome to "steal" anything you wish. The greatest thing about blogging is to be able to spread information and/or a chuckle or two to the greatest number of people possible!

Posted by: delftsman3 at April 25, 2006 03:08 PM (xw9HL)

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Reconnected, AT LAST

Rumors to the contrary, I haven't died, or ran away to be with an exotic circus dwarf.

Seems that there were some problems with my internet connection; as in, I didn't HAVE a connection due to some unfortunate circumstances....funny how IP's are so slow to tender services and so damned fast to cut you loose if you miss paying a phone bill you didn't even know you had....

Enough grousing about troubles, Let me do some cruising and see what I can come up with for you; assuming any of you have bothered to keep me on your reading lists.

Be back in a bit to share anything that might have caught my eye, so please reinstate me to your lists, because I'm aiming to get back in your good graces.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 03:25 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

March 30, 2006

I AM BART

You Are Bart Simpson

Very misunderstood, most people just dismiss you as "trouble." Little do they know that you're wise and well accomplished beyond your years. You will be remembered for: starring in your own TV show and saving the town from a comet Your life philosophy: "I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I'll do it again!"

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 05:09 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

"Gringos Go Home?"

I'm feeling almost human again, although still a little on the shaky side both physically and mentally. I felt it might be time to try to see if I can still make a post that may strike a chord with someone, whether they agree or disagree.
I would again like to give my thanks to all of you for being so kind and patient with me this last month your prayers and well wishes are truly the best things that sustain me.

Read on and let me know if I have succeeded or not.

I caught the march in Los Angeles onh the periphery of my conciousness the other day....and I must say I'm kind of glad that they (La Rasa and LULAC) are organizing events such as this.

WHY? you might ask. It's like this; illegal immigration has been a "hidden" but growing problem for the last ten years or so, and now, finally, the true goals of groups such as La Rasa and LULAC are out in the open.

For far too long they have tried to pass themselves off as nothing more than "defenders of the rights of discriminated against people" They are NOT. They are nothing less than invaders of the USA, attempting to take over a large section of our country.

They claim that the Europeans are the invaders of the land and that they are the "indigenous people".....hate to remind them, but in reality, should they care to look into their own history they would find that there was this european country called Spain that conquered the lands they were born in in the 1500's...they are no more indigenous than my neighbor is. They are "mutts" as much as any American is. It's true that Indian blood is a part of their heritage also, but that is just as true for many White and Black Americans as well.

The issue here is whether or not a country has the right to limit entry into it's sovereign territory or not, and what is expected of those that chose to leave the lands of their birth to become citizens of a new country. That is the main problem; these people did not come to become citizens, they came to provide mere survival for their families, and in the process expected the American culture to adapt to them, and the PC crowd has provided them ammunition in this clash of cultures.

The present difficulty has been greatly exacerbated by the PC concept of multicultualism. We have Balkanized our country with these misguided concepts, and WE have allowed it to continue unabated for far too long...so we bear part of the blame for the present unrest.

RACIST! you might try to call me; how DARE you deny a people their heritage! "Don't you know how discriminatory we are against these Brown people?"

I say B U L L S H I T . I too am from another country, My family decided to come here because of the opportunities that are freely available ONLY in the U.S. NO ONE can be prouder of his heritage than I am, BUT when I came here, I came to be an AMERICAN; to join myself with, and to add to, a new heritage, of which I am even prouder. I, and all of my brothers were proud to volunteer to do military service to defend our new homeland in a time when the draft was still in effect, and there was a war raging in the Far East. None of us ended up serving in combat, but that was just the luck of the draw, and the areas where I and at least one of my brothers served were "trip lines" in the Cold War; areas where, should the Cold have turned Hot, we were the front line of defense, and probably would have been hard pressed to survive the initial onset of hostilities. Why do I bring this up? It's because I see the attitude of these protesters and know that they are NOT Americans looking to be equally treated and respected, but nothing less than invaders trying to infiltrate, destabilize, and ultimately defeat, the country that I love. They are the enemy, and they should be treated as such.

I have no problem with anyone from ANY country coming here to try to make a new life and provide greater benefits for their families; and by all means, be proud of your background heritage and culture, but always keep in mind that AMERICA is the culture that is sustaining you and giving you the opportunities that you didn't have before you came here.

Come here through the legal channels just as millions of us did before you and add your little piece to the tapestry of America that we are weaving as a nation; I will welcome you as a friend. Come here surrepticiously, and work to try to change our tapestry to match your old one (that didn't provide you with a means to live as you wished) and you will be my enemy. Burn the flag that I pledged my honor to defend in my presence and you WILL pay the price.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 03:51 PM | Comments (10) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Getting Older Test

As we all get older, I'm sure that you would like to stay
"alive 'n sharp" for as long as possible. The harsh reality is however,
that none of us live forever, and one of these days each one of us is
likely to finally lose our smarts. If you're like most, you'll want to
know when that happens, so that you don't embarrass either yourself or your
loved ones. So I'm convinced that each of us should take a good hard look
at ourselves from time to time.

During a visit to a hospital for the mentally infirm, a visitor asked
the Director what the criterion was that defined whether or not a
patient should be institutionalized.

"Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub and then we offer a
teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to
empty the bathtub."

"Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would use the
bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup."

"No," said the Director, "a normal person would pull the plug.
Do you want a bed by the wall or near the window?"

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 02:10 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

March 27, 2006

Rumors to the contrary

No, I'm not dead, or back in the hospital (though the way I've been feeling, that really doesn't sound like a bad idea).

I just have been feeling, as Acidman would say, "worse than Fido's ass".

I haven't been able to sit in the computer chair for any length of time to even check my e-mail, much less blog; and I haven't been coherant long enough to write anything that makes sense if I could.

I went to see a neurologist the other day to see about some things that may just be side effects of my meds or may be indications of some new problems. He's arranging to get some tests done; a PET scan, a tilt-table orientation test, and a full panel of endrocin tests, and my PCP has arranged for me to have a renal function series to be done too. Needless to say, I'm going to be busy the next few weeks, but at least it seems that the Docs are getting serious about seeing what I really need and what they can do for me.

Hopefully, I'll feel up to resuming regular posting soon, and I really want to let all of you, my internet friends that your prayers and best wishes really are the best medicine a guy can have, and I really do appreciate you all.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 03:49 AM | Comments (14) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

March 15, 2006

just a little humor

Still don't feel up to doing the research for a dercent post/rant, but I thought I'd pass along some jokes that Catfish e-mailed me.

One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed
in a very sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do
anything you want."

So he tied her up and went golfing .

******************************************************************

A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license.

First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test.

The optician showed him a card with the letters:
'C Z W I X N&nb sp;O S T A C Z.' "Can you read this?" the optician asked.

"Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know that guy."
**************************************************************************************
Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them,
"I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in
the convent."

"Thank God," said an elderly nun at the back. "I'm so tired of
chardonnay."

******************************************************************

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he said,
"CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking
too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!
We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get
MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful ... CAREFUL! I
said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking!
Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your
mind? Don't forget to salt & pepper them. You know you always forget to salt
them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"

The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you? You
think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels
like when I'm driving."

******************************************************************
Fifty-one years ago, Herman James, a North Carolina mountain man, was
drafted by the Army. On his first day in basic ;training, the Army
issued
him a comb. That afternoon the Army barber sheared off all his hair.

On his second day, the Army issued Herman a toothbrush. That
afternoon the Army dentist yanked seven of his teeth.

On the third day, the Army issued him a jock strap. The Army has been
looking for Herman for 51 years.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 09:19 PM | Comments (13) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

March 10, 2006

Joke of the Day

Sitting together on a train, traveling through the Swiss Alps, are a French guy, an American guy, a n old Greek lady and a young blonde Swiss girl. The train goes into a dark tunnel and a few seconds later there is the sound of a loud slap. When the train emerges from the tunnel, the Frenchman has a bright red ha! nd print on his cheek. No one speaks.

The old lady thinks: The Frenchman must have groped the blonde in the dark, and she slapped his cheek.

The blonde thinks: That Frenchman must have tried to grope me in the d! ark, but missed and fondled the old lady and she slapped his cheek.

The Frenchman thinks: The American must have groped the blonde in the dark. She tried to slap him but missed and got me instead.

The American thinks: I can't wait for another tunnel, so I can smack that Frenchman again.

to GuyK

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 03:22 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Home Again

First off, I would like to thank everyone that showed me such support over this last week, you can't imagine just how much it meant to me. You don't really realize just how many friends you have until it really matters, and believe me, it really mattered to me to find that I am so rich in that area.

I'm feeling as weak as a puppy, but otherwise pretty good; only the normal aches and pains that us old out of shape codgers experience on a daily basis.

The doctors have totally revamped my drug schedule, and it's great. Only five doses in the morning and three at night. Along with a strict diet plan and a close monitering of weight/B-P, nothing that should be a huge difficulty. Except quitting smoking, of course. I've quit for over a year twice before; hopefully, this time, it will be a permanent cessation. I may try hypnosis reinforcement this time....I've tried everything else, so another new way to go may just be the key that does the trick. Idiotic as it sounds, one of the biggest problems with trying to quit is the fact that I still ENJOY smoking. Yeah, I know how that sounds, and I agree with everything any of you'll say about that piece of lunacy, but nevertheless, it's just a fact of life.

The short term prognosis is fairly decent, and mostly dependent on my own abilities to stick with the program, so I have high confidence that I'll do well.
It will be hard to limit my meat intake, but I really do like vegatables if cooked correctly, so thats doable. Salt will be difficult to deal with, not so much because I'm addicted to it, but because it's hidden in so many things that you'd never think about, and they have me limited to 1500mg a day or less... were you aware that a one ounce serving of pudding has 160mg of salt in it?!? One decent sized Dill Pickle would almost put me over the limit. It's going to be an adventure in eating to see just what I can't anymore.

The worst thing about a stay in the hospital is the seemingly insatiatiable thirst for blood by everyone involved in your care. I swear, even the orderlys seemed to need an ounce or two before they could get on with their other duties. "you'll feel just a little pinch" and "this will be pretty painless" were phrases I truly came to despise, even though ( except in the case of a certain student nurse that seemed to think a blood draw was a hunting expedition for the "PERFECT" vein) for the 99.9 % of the time it was true. I am the victim of Belonephobia (thanks Beth!), or the unreasoning fear of needles. I SEE a needle, and my natural impulse is to be at least two blocks away from the offending implement in the next half second or so, and faster than that, if possible. I can't honestly say that blood draws and IV's are painful, they AREN'T. (again, with the unusual exception of that one clumsy student nurse trying to learn her craft).

The potassium injections they gave me in my stomach four times a day were a bit painful, but then again, not really anything to really get hyper about.

But to me, the smallest guage butterfly needle looked to have the bore of a twenty pounder cannon and served to elevate my B/P by 50 points at the mere contemplation of said instrument corrupting the integrity of my dermal covering. (and when your B/P is at 270/180 to begin with, that gets into stroke territory)

Being the recipiant of the attentions of these vampires on a what seemed like a ten minute basis certainly made things uncomfortable, to say the least....but at least I wasn't screaming like a little girl (and the ice cream they let me have made up for the recaltarance I was feeling over a period of time ) I don't think I'll ever totally get over my unreasonable fear of needles, but this last week has let me know that I can survive it with at least a little pride left.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 02:52 PM | Comments (79) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

1 Yaaay! Glad you're finally home, hon! A low sodium diet can be a bitch especially if you love pickles, olives, and chips like I do. It takes awhile to get used to it but don't think of it as being deprived. If you can't have something you want have a little more of something you CAN have. Try looking online for low sodium substitutes and stay away from prepackaged foods. I've missed you and your jokes, sweetie.

Posted by: Elizabeth at March 10, 2006 10:24 PM (WLztO)

2 This is the best news I've had all day, welcome home Bert.

Posted by: Jack at March 11, 2006 12:22 AM (NU4O0)

3 Delfts,
Glad to see your back Ma Man!!!You know we all missed you.But you did cause us to get a nasty little troll while you were gone at blog-gig!!!
Good read for laughs..Anyhow Hope to see more of you online.. Damn it don't be scaring us like that again..UGHHH!! ********HUGS*********

Posted by: VANDEA at March 11, 2006 12:55 AM (v5cxG)

4 All the same, Delfts,

Welcome back.

You've been sorely missed.

RWR
www.rightwingrocker.com

Posted by: RightWingRocker at March 11, 2006 03:10 AM (OIxPT)

5 Yar! Welcome back aboard, me hearty (pun intended). Now take care of yourself, follow the regimen and keep on keepin' on. Hugs and Kisses all around! You and yours are STILL in my prayers, and will always remain there.

Posted by: ZiPpo at March 11, 2006 08:10 AM (ERI6q)

6 Welcome back. You "sound" great!!

Posted by: Grandma Jo at March 11, 2006 08:46 AM (MwV73)

7 w00t! Welcome back! And now ya gotta take care of yerself. I know it's hard to kick the ciggies but you can do it! It does help to have something you like everytime the urge becomes uncomfortable. If it's candy or some other treat just try to take it easy. If it's something else you crave, well, just try to take it easy...

Posted by: sig 94 at March 11, 2006 01:32 PM (BnMdL)

8 Delfts, glad to see ya out and about! All you can do is play the cards you're dealt. Had a couple needles stuck in my knees this week to remove some fluid and inject some cortisone. Never felt a thing, (well maybe a little thing or 2) Take care and do what ya need to do!
See ya

Posted by: maxxdog at March 11, 2006 02:06 PM (LMIOn)

9 Good to see you back home Delfts. Take care of yourself to make sure you don't go back.

Dea is right: your condition did attract the Nastiest Troll Ever™

Posted by: Radical Redneck at March 11, 2006 05:14 PM (+VNlz)

10 Darn good to see ya back my friend but you made my blood run cold talking about the vampires. I have lots of first hand experience with that and it wasn't pretty.

One hemotologist told me, as he hunted around in my arm for one last decent vein to tap, "don't worry, we're gonna save your life, but we have to practically kill you in order to do that."

Ya know what? He was right!

Stick with the program, life is worth a little extra effort.

Linda

Posted by: LindaSoG at March 11, 2006 07:20 PM (Mn+kd)

11 Good to hear you are home Bert. I know what you mean about the damn needles and blood. I have to stick myself and get blood for the sugar test three times a day. I'll tel a story one of these days about needles and how I learned to live with them. Get yourself back in shape because I am still planing on taking you fishing next time you are down this way.

Posted by: GUYK at March 11, 2006 07:30 PM (iAhlK)

12 Delftsman,
It's so good to hear that your home and to see you posting at the Rott. We missed you. Bet you're the happiest man right now. I use to work at a hospital and people who hadn't smiled or said anything nice in weeks would change overnight on the day they went home.

Glad to see you home.

Posted by: SoCalOilMan at March 11, 2006 10:17 PM (7AX0Z)

13 Glad you are home. Be well, be strong. People are depending on you!

Posted by: hoosierboy at March 12, 2006 08:35 AM (tt4DJ)

14 Lambertus,
It made my day when Dea told me you were home.It may be difficult to adjust your diet but not insurmountable, and as a stubborn Dutchmen Im sure you will.Glad your out and you can be sure at next years blogfest we will have a Delfts friendly menu. My daughters a vegitarian and Ill get her to prepare something tasty.Glad your out ,stay healthy.
Cheers from Sunny Tampa Bay

Posted by: Lc NeilV at March 12, 2006 11:19 AM (v5cxG)

15 Glad to hear you're back home.

Posted by: Will at March 13, 2006 06:52 AM (C3Iev)

16 You sound great - so positive about all the things you are going to do to be well. Eventually you'll feel like it was all worth it. Your two little girls are counting on you to keep their Daddy around for a long time.

Posted by: jraye at March 13, 2006 08:57 AM (2mqPf)

17 Yippee!!

Welcome Home! Tah dah!

I love this kind of news.
You oare so funny about the needles....LMAO, I know what you mean, it does get like that.

Welcome Home Bert!

Posted by: Wild Thing at March 13, 2006 11:04 AM (qrCVJ)

18 Missed you D-man!

Hope you're feeling much better, hon!

Posted by: Lady Heather at March 13, 2006 05:49 PM (0DWeb)

19 The worst thing is when they wake you up to take blood.

Posted by: Karlo at March 14, 2006 09:09 AM (KONnJ)

20 Glad you are back home. Take care and watch yourself, Cat

Posted by: Catfish at March 14, 2006 11:01 AM (KYMED)

21 Good to hear you're doing better. Best of luck with the new denial - er, diet.

Hope you got all the best looking 'vampires' at least.

Posted by: Dave S. at March 14, 2006 05:28 PM (I15ul)

22 Hey Delfts E-mail me your address.I've got some great cookbooks I can send you.Really healthy shit that actually tastes awesome!!! E-MAIL me I'll hook ya up.
Dea

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Posted by: Peril at August 15, 2006 04:21 PM (c5gQ5)

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March 08, 2006

Wednesday...

I got a call from Delfts this morning letting me know that he may be released on Thursday. His spirits were not good, and honestly I can hardly blame him for that. It's a kick in the teeth to finally admit that a total lifestyle change is in order, especially when one's spouse can be a raving lunatic. It is also very sobering to find out that the disease he has is chronic, cumulative, and typically runs its course in 5 years. If you're lucky.

No salt.
No cigarettes.
No fats.
No caffine.
No lazy days spent entirely either in bed or at the computer.
No excuses.

He will make these changes, or he will die, simple as that.

My submissive, michael, suggested that I get some brochures and ask him go ahead and pick out his urn now in the hopes it will sink in that this is no longer a matter of mind over matter or willing one's self to be well in spite of one's behaviors, not that it ever truly was. Sounds cruel. Sounds tough. Maybe that is what is called for.

Honestly, I do not know what to do.

One thing is for certain, I have made sure that no longer will there be beef in abundance, unfettered use of salt, or rich foods in the house. Gone are the days of bringing in a half pound of 3yr old cheese that should have lasted for a very long time, even when shared by 4 adults, only to find it all gone the next day with nothing remaining but the wax rind on the floor in front of the television. And the days of going to the refrigerator to get a roasted chicken to make dinner and finding nothing but a plastic container of bones and scraps. And the days of bringing home sacks of White Castles. And the days of going to a nice restaurant and ordering the entire menu.

No more "Competitive Eating" as michael has so aptly described it.

So now in anticipation of Delfts' arrival home tomorrow, jane is vacuuming and cleaning and setting up his area in the family room so that he will be comfortable. When I get home from work tonight, we are going to pitch in together to clear out his computer desk area. Then I will go through the kitchen and hide everything that he cannot have. michael and jane have already agreed to keep any Blacklisted Foods that they buy for themselves in their room, and I have a small refrigerator to put in there so that they can.

I know he's extremely frustrated right now, a lot of it with me. I did not visit him for as long or as often as he wanted. Nor did I bring snacks and drinks, or sit and baby him like I have done in the past. I was not the loving and doting wife who plumped pillows and slept in a chair until 3am in case he needed a sip of water or a steadying hand to help him to the bathroom. I didn't because I couldn't.

I just wasn't able to emotionally. There is just too much anger and hurt right now, knowing that other than the waiting, he has ultimately succeeded in his passive suicide. There is too much betrayal from the belief that our marriage and our daughter were not good enough for him to want to make the changes he should have made four years ago at the onset of this, changes that would have allowed him to perhaps see Anna graduate from high school.

Every one of you, look into your mirror and take a long look at the person you see. Look around you at all of the people who's lives you touch every day. Look at your children, at your parents, at your husband or your wife and think about how terrible it would be to lose any one of them. Think of how you would grieve them, mourn their loss, miss them every day. Imagine holidays and birthdays and graduations and weddings without them. No more trick or treating, no more trips to the range, no more silly jokes, no more hugs, no more... life.

Now, put yourself in their shoes and know how your death will affect them.

Don't do to them what is happening here.

Mamamontezz

Posted by: Mamamontezz at 06:01 PM | Comments (12) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

1 Mamamontezz,

Does he believe he deserves to live and be healthier? Sometimes we sabotage ourselves because we don't believe we deserve better. And all the love in the world from the outside can't make a person love himself inside. Only he can do that.

Delfts, if you don't believe right now that you deserve to live, then believe your family and friends until you can believe it yourself; use their belief as a crutch to do what you need to do to live.

I worked with someone once who was really a jerk (really). He got cancer. After he came back to work, as several of us were sitting in a meeting room waiting for others to arrive, he said "you know, it is when you seem to have the least control of your life that you realize how much control you really have." He was still a jerk, but it is true.

It isn't that eating healthy and exercising deprive you. It is that they can save you. And you deserve to save yourself.

If you give up salt, you will develop an appreciation for how food really tastes (I've had to do it and it's true). If you give up caffeine, you will sleep better and wake up sooner. And so on. And you will live longer.

Life is good. Live it and enjoy it. Don't die before you're dead and please don't give death an early invitation in.

Don't do it for your family. Do it for you.

Grandma Jo

Posted by: Grandma_Jo at March 08, 2006 06:44 PM (MwV73)

2 Delfts (& Mama M),

Look at it as a pathway to Ultimate Studliness!

And I would definitely take up Darth Bacon's offer of healthy, but tasty, recipes.

And yes.....LISTEN TO YOUR WIFE! (Speaking for my husband, lol)

Posted by: Lady Heather at March 08, 2006 10:35 PM (0DWeb)

3 Thanks for the update on how you're doing, Mama.

How's Delftsman doing?

Posted by: the Humble Devildog at March 08, 2006 11:10 PM (TIYju)

4 Thanks for the update Lila, I'm saddened to hear the sad state of Bert's heart. You're so right about the lifestyle changes he'll have to make to live on. I live with restrictions everyday, no matter how well intentioned they may be or from whom they may come, Bert has to say no to food being offered that he knows is bad for him.

Bert, it's not easy to know that your condition is not going to get any better, but you can improve what you have. My wife and daughter think I'm going to starve to death if I miss a meal, Bull----! I monitor and regulate my own bloodsugar, my own food intake, quantities and qualities of food and the exercise I get, it's all under my control. Its a constant battle of medication and regulation that I normally lose, but 3 to 4 times a day I get a sobering dose of reality, it keeps me honest. Yes I've spent some time in the ER, most unpleasant too. It's too damn easy to die, so do this for not only yourself but for those who love and depend on you. I getting too preachy so get well soon my friend. You are loved!!!

Posted by: Jack at March 09, 2006 12:15 PM (c/lGZ)

5 Delfts ,
You have no choice but to change your habits ,a little of the things you like .It beats the alternative and we all want you around for a long time ...Its only 11 months till the next FLorida Rott Fest we want to see you...there

Posted by: Lc NeilV at March 09, 2006 01:49 PM (v5cxG)

6 Mama M

You are an amazing lady. Your tough love at this point is the best thing you can do for him. Men are so damn stubborn when it comes to their health. I had an argument with my spouse, who is 43, last night about taking care of himself better. But, because he works out regularly he doesn't feel he has to watch his diet or see a doctor at least once a year. It makes me so mad. He has high blood pressure, but feels that its not a big deal. I've invested 21 years of my "youth" in him and damn well resent the attitude. You'll be in my prayers Ma'am. You take care and tell your husband to deal with the reality he had a hand in creating. God bless both of you.

Posted by: Theresa at March 10, 2006 01:51 PM (tN0oi)

7 What a precious and awesome family you have Bert. I know why they love you and now after meeting them in this way I see why you love them. You are a very lucky man to have such a great family.

I was reading about one of our soldiers that lost one of his legs. He has tons of therapy to go through and he did an interview with Sean Hannity. He said he wants to go back again and help with his troop to finish the job.

Bert, I brought that up because he is not giving up. And I don't want you to give up either. He may not have to do what you do, giving up lots of goodies and smoking etc. But both of you will be overcoming hurdles that so many of us have not had to do. But also many others have done in their lives. Each day will be a hill you will take in your battle to live and be better. I believe in you Bert,I know you can do this.

We all think we are never going to have anything happen to us. Some people never get a warning, never get a chance to make changes for the better. This is fantastic that you do get this chance and that is a positive thing. And you have such an awesome team with you.

I am probably older then you are so take this from an old broad. You are loved, so please oh please think hard about doing these changes and then do them. Then we can have tons of laughs and fight the good fight against the terrorists as bloggers buddies into forever.

Posted by: Wild Thing at March 10, 2006 02:12 PM (tj1zH)

8 Bert my friend, it ain't as bad as you think it will be. hell man, I had to change my lifestyle years ago to about what you are going to have to do. No smokes, no booze, none of the pleasures (or what I used to think were the pleasures) of life. But I found out that there is a lot more to living the rich food, booze, smoking, and the vices that were about to kill me. At least I didn't have to give up singin! But I still enjy life-probably even more than I used to because it is more precious to me now. Hang tough and live. I still plan on you making the trip down and going fishing with me.

Posted by: GUYK at March 10, 2006 02:23 PM (iAhlK)

9 Well said. Well said. Damn, well said, Mama. Love to you and yours.

Posted by: ZiPpo at March 11, 2006 08:13 AM (ERI6q)

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