October 05, 2003
Progress report...
Potatoes done to perfection. Two of the three different flavored hamsteaks are done, half the bacon and all of the scrapple.
People report-George left. He went to work on his flooring job. Okay... Eric is driving a hay ride. He'll be back shortly. He's all excited about driving and getting all cold and coming back to this huge breakfast. Cool... Eric, Jr. is out running around with Aaron who will be joining us for breakfast. Almost makes me feel like Acidman is here in spirit, me feeding two teenaged boys. If I only had grits... Be back...Posted by: Stevie at 11:00 AM | Comments (50) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Good Morning!!
I was sittin' here a little while ago, sipping coffee, visiting a few people...just waking up.
I go see Greg and suddenly, I'm inspired (and rolling on the floor laughing). I step into the kitchen and dice up several large potatoes into a buttered baking pan. Throw in a few onions and a couple blobs of butter, cover with tinfoil and threw it in the oven on about 400-425 degrees. Then, I went to the store. I already had eggs, scrapple and makings for pancakes, syrup and all. I got hamsteaks, bacon, Pillsbury Grands Danish things and o.j. I've got the scrapple going, to be followed shortly with the bacon and ham, during which I'll do pancakes-with and without corn...they are sooo good with corn in 'em-while waiting for the potaoes to finish so I can start the danish things. Eggs are last with the toast. Eric is getting about 4 eggs, salt, pepper, garlic and a splash of milk, made into an omlet with cheese folded into it. On top of all this other crap. See what ya started, Teapot? Oh...and Barry White is blasting away, too. This is FUN!!! I'll be back...Posted by: Stevie at 10:28 AM | Comments (50) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
October 04, 2003
Linkfest 10-4...as in the date, not cop-talk for 'okay', okay?
Here's a link-fest to check out while I'm out directing boneheads-who-don't-mind-having-a-hayride-and-fireworks-in-the-rain where to park.
Man...if this one works, I'll be really happy. I had to do it the linkage twice, 'cause I messed it up and it's the first time I'm trying to link a specific post. Get everything ya can crossed and hang on....here we go. Okay...the link to the specific post didn't work. So, try this one. Hate to make ya's miss out on the rest of his site, anyhow...Posted by: Stevie at 03:45 PM | Comments (49) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Update....
Last load in dryer...Apple Crisp done...tollhouse-third sheet in, fourth on deck...chicken thawing. Been to the store and back, too.
I keep laughing out loud at two mind movies... 1. The Little Teapot 2. This guy belching, lips flapping... Except for the fact that I'm pretty much alone, laughing like a lunatic, everything is goin' good...
Posted by: Stevie at 08:11 AM | Comments (48) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Okay, so I got side-tracked a coupla times...
Still...the house is just about done. It's clean...cat boxes, dishes, vacuuming and all that shit. Most of the laundry is done, too. All I've got left is the light loads. But, I did all the coveralls, Carharts, FLANNELS, longjohns...you get the idea. I also ran a few errands, cooked dinner and got way'laid' around 11:00pm. (Yeah, Baby!)
I am about to make Apple Crisp, Tollhouse cookies and chicken n dumplings or chicken potpie, whatever ya wanna call it. I made those broad flat 'noodle-things' by hand...Dad's recipe.
I also have to run back to the grocery store for a minute. Or two.
Speaking of which...Greg is just too cute. Well, the 90lb. bonehead-dog wants out, so I guess I better go.
I'll be around..(Now, that's a good song...)
Posted by: Stevie at 05:24 AM | Comments (48) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
October 03, 2003
One last thing (for now)...
Apropos of nothing...
I adore Nathan Lane and I think 'The Birdcage' is the funniest freakin' movie I've seen/taped in a looong time. I love ya, Nathan. I wish I could've seen you and Matthew Broderick in 'The Producers' and I DO NOT go to Broadway plays. Ever.Yo, Nate...was that you in that Dwight Yoakam video when he was that jerk named "Daaaarrrryyyllll"? In the elevator? Takin' his skinny ass to the 'Sugar Room'? My favorite part of 'Birdcage' is when Robin Williams (Ar-maaand) is trying to teach him how to act 'butch'. When he 'pierces' his toast....rotflmao...and his driving? Dear God.
I can just see his cute little face saying "Whhaa-aat?" Nothing, Lovy. You're just adorable... Alrighty, then...I'm outta here...for now.
Posted by: Stevie at 10:23 AM | Comments (53) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Today's "Damn it do" list...
1. Step away from the computer.
2. Play music (everything from AC/DC to Jesus Christ Superstar, Pink Floyd to Waylon, SRV to Charlie Rich, including lotsa Dork...oops, I mean Dwight Yoakam and Larry Gatlin) really, really loudly. 3. Clean entire house including laundry, dishes..everything. 4. Do not touch computer until #3 is done. 5. Uh-huh...right. 6. Wait in vain for an answer to the Site Meter question. Ready? Set? Go.....Posted by: Stevie at 10:13 AM | Comments (48) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Ya know it's gonna be an interesting day...
When the first song to get stuck in your head, for no apparent reason, mind you, is Herman Munster singing that "Foot bones connected to my ankle bone..." song. God. Help. Me. (Please?)
And, Site Meter offers no explanation for the 'blocked referrer' thing....Anyone? Bueller? Frye?
(Let my Cameron goooo)
Posted by: Stevie at 10:04 AM | Comments (51) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Question...
What does it mean on Site Meter when one visitor is listed as 'Blocked Referrer' on the referrals page?
I haven't blocked anybody. Did they block themselves like you can on the phone with caller i.d.? If someone did, why would they do that?
(Sigh...I know. '4 questions, etc.')
Posted by: Stevie at 01:47 AM | Comments (51) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
October 02, 2003
Names...
I've read a few things lately about names. How people choose them, why they choose them, which ones are good, which ones are stupid...stuff like that.
Take my name-please. I hate it. I never have liked it and I doubt I ever will.
First of all, it's spelled wrong. D-A-U-N. Real nice. Not only is it stupid, I can't even get a keychain or a coffee cup with my name on it without paying extra to get it spelled correctly. Then, nobody ever believes that's how it's spelled. I had to bring a note to my Kindergarten teacher from my (retarded) mother to prove that that is how it's spelled. Even after you prove it, nobody spells it right. My own Grandmother never got it right. (Of course, she spelled picnic p-i-c-k-n-i-c-k.)
Well, you're probably saying, you can't tell it's spelled weird by the way it sounds. You're right. However...
There are only two songs I know of that have that name in 'em. "Dawn, Go Away' and 'Delta Dawn'. Great. One exhorts me to leave, the other is about a frickin' fruit loop.
Then, there's the dish soap. Lovely. I love being associated with grease.
They even had dolls named Dawn when I was a kid. They were little things with really long hair and perfect little bodies that I wished I had. Great. Personalized Barbies. That idiotic representation of womanhood nobody can ever live up to. (Those stupid 'Barbie twin' chicks are about as full of silicone and molded by plastic surgery as one can get. They don't count. Besides, I hate 'em. I saw some stupid show about how 'horrible' their lives are. Oh, boo-hoo. Shut the fuck up and go get some more surgery, you not-remotely-real bimbos...)
And...
The only word in the English language that does contain my name means 'to frighten or dishearten' which is daunt. Dauntless isn't much better, either.
Then, there's my middle name, which mommie-dearest also spelled wrong. Lea. It's pronounced just like L-e-e. Wanna take a guess how many arguements I've had about that? People are forever trying to tell me it's pronounced Lee-a. I think I'd know if it was, okay?
My (stupid) mother's sister tries to make me feel better about the whole thing by reminding me of her theory that my name means 'Morning Meadow'. Sigh. The only thing that I see in my mind with that explanation is a field full of dewy piles of horse shit with the sun rising in the background.
I just hate my name.
Which is why I prefer going by 'Stevie'. There's Stevie Nicks, Stevie Ray Vaughan...much better associations for me, personally. Besides, it's spelled right.
I realize it could be worse. I could've been named one of those horrible names that sound like someone threw a handful of silverware down the steps and named their kid after the ensuing noise it makes. Or like they named the kid after noises their mothers made giving birth.
I'll just stick with Stevie, thanks. Matter of fact, I'm gonna go put one of my many SRV CD's in now. God, I love that guy....
Posted by: Stevie at 03:09 PM | Comments (56) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Bananas + boobs?
What, in the name of all that is Holy, are you looking for?
The closest thing to banana boobs I've ever seen are on that old lady in the Hustler cartoons.
I, however, have always referred to them as 'torpedo tits'.
Posted by: Stevie at 02:27 PM | Comments (49) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
October 01, 2003
It's fixed....
And, yeah, Greg. I am your age. I do have a more recent photo I'd post, but how do you scan pictures in/on when you don't have a scanner or the know-how? Is there anyplace I can take it and get someone to scan it for me? In the meantime, I really don't look a lot different. Except, my hair is longer. Paul, the sweetie, fixed it.
Posted by: Stevie at 03:48 PM | Comments (54) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Remember that whole horse deal?
And how I said, as I read the 'Pet' ads, that I don't really need another dog or cat? Yeah. So do I.
Well, it seems that God may be about to give me another critter anyway. Completely unsolicited by me. I like to think that this is His way of saying 'Sorry...'. I'd also like to think that God, of all entities, would know the difference between a horse and a Border Collie. (Sign #1-my Uncle Henry, whom I loved to death-always had Border Collies at his farm.) Apparently not. There's this Border Collie that George has come to know at one of his jobs. Her name is Daisy (sign #2. My bestest dog ever was named Daisy.) and she's living in a condo right now. If ya know anything about Border Collies then you know that's not the ideal place for one. She currently belongs to the daughter of the woman George is doing flooring for. Mom doesn't want the dog in her condo anymore and daughter can't have her where she lives, so she may be coming here. Well, actually she is coming here Saturday for the 'test visit'. If she doesn't terrorize the cats and everybody gets along reasonably well, she'll probably be staying. Which is cool but...not a horse.Close, though. They can both herd cows.
Posted by: Stevie at 07:47 AM | Comments (48) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
About that skank...
Didn't even have to look at her. She stayed wherever she was and I actually got shit done outside.
I got rid of the trash...emptied my cans into the dumpster, cleared the 'logs for the fireplace' area, got all the animals in the area taken care of and blabbed at a few people.
Neither of them heard me. But, Eric and I were laughing our asses off. Believe me, if they want, I'll let 'em hear me. When the need arises, I'm sure they will. Hear me, that is.
I also found out that Billy's wife doesn't like the skank, either. Good. Another chick with a brain.
I also got the word out about my feelings on the whole subject. I hope she hears of it and wants to ask me about it. I'll explain it to her fully, completely and in a way she'll never forget. "I am a cranky, old, slightly over-weight bitch. I do not like you. You plop yourself down in the middle of situations around Eric that do not concern you. Not to even mention the fact that the first time I ever saw you, not only were you wearing some kinda 'whore pants', you also made it clear you had been around Eric before. So, I actually despise you. Now, when I am back into my 29's, you can run around here naked for all I care. I'll just be sitting with everybody else laughing at you. But, until such time as I am no longer threatened by you..like, fer instance-I'm in the 29's or you are dead, you just keep your 'wanna-be-Brittany-fugly-assed-Spears-self outta here. 'Kay?" Couple that with the manical grin I picture on my face and the Pusser club within my easy reach and I think she'll get the message. Hey. At least I'm honest.
Posted by: Stevie at 07:32 AM | Comments (51) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Ya know you guys...
Commenting is free.
And, I am interested in getting new perspectives, ideas and opinions.
Feedback, Baby. I'm all about wantin' feedback.
Posted by: Stevie at 07:10 AM | Comments (57) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
on this one.
September 30, 2003
Excellent!
I just got out of the shower and went to get dressed. I was looking for my largest pair of jeans. Couldn't find 'em anywhere. I'm thinkin' 'How the hell do I manage to lose a pair of jeans that big?' So, I grabbed the next smallest pair. They are 2" smaller around the waist.
To my complete surprise, I got them on with ease.
I can breathe, sit, bend over and there's no roll hanging over the waist band.
Wow.
Thank you, Lord.
Posted by: Stevie at 04:21 PM | Comments (50) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Time to go outside now...
It's just occured to me (not for the first time) that I am strange. I'm gonna go outside and find something to do so I can make sure that little skank keeps her distance, right? Right.
But...I'm not going to put on full-face makeup or dress up or anything. I feel completely threatened by this bitch, but all I want to do is warn her off. Warn her off, run her off, knock her off...whatever. Totally female reaction. But, why am I not doing the 'makeup and' thing? Should I? Hmmm. I dunno.
All I want is for her to realize that there are some people who do not think she's God's gift to humanity. That there are a few people who are not enchanted because of her looks. And, that by dressing the way she does, she comes across as a whore who needs to be beat down. Who the hell else would wear jeans with zippers up both pant legs from the cuffs to the waist? Looks to me like easy access. Uh-huh. Get the fuck outta here. Bitch. Eric's been milking out there for almost two years without your fuckin' help. He does not need you now. You, however, are going to need an ambulance if you don't make yourself scarce. (God, I'm a bitch...as I sit here giggling while I write this.)
I can absolutely see the stupidity of the way I feel, but I still feel that way.
WHY??? Damn it.
I know I have nothing to worry about...yet, I'd still like to see her covered in cow shit or bleeding. (Actually both...)
OOhh...I know...I'll hang her ass up on a hay hook and use her like that picture of JLo. Until she rots too much. Then, I can recycle her by feeding her to the 900 lb. pig who lives here. Be the most useful for anything she ever was.
THANKS MOM!!! I really appreciate you fuckin' me over with all my boyfriends until ya died. Makes it real fuckin' easy to deal with bitches...I mean women, now. I'm still friends with every guy I went out with. Except the ones who fucked her. And, why did I go the 'blame and not trust women' route, instead of hanging it on the men? I do not know. But, I did. And, still do. Maybe because my Dad was one of her victims. And, I was always closer to him than her. Til his current 'her' showed up. (Another chick to reinforce my opinion of women...just what I needed. Sigh...)
Well, just kill me now. I've always liked men more than women, gotten along better with men than women and understood men better than women.
Sorry ladies. I may be one of you , but I ain't one of you. Know what I mean? Some of your 'sisters' did that for ya. Made me have fear and borderline hate before I even know who ya's are.
If...and that's a big IF..a woman is nice and approaches me with a look other than that nasty 'fuck you' face most women wear like a badge of honor, I'm open to talking to 'em. If they just sit (or stand) there with that look, I don't even bother. Men don't do that. Men are always nice on approach. (Shut up. I don't care why. At least they try to be nice. Women don't. Okay...lotsa women don't.) And, unless I've done something to deserve it, I don't like it. I'm always on guard with women, trying not to give 'em a reason. But, they act like asses anyway. Hell, maybe that's why I'm so ready to jump on this bitch like stink on shit. Shit does roll downhill. And, when it's the only way you've been shown to act...what else do ya do? I've always been of the 'like men more than women' school, but, now that I'm with Eric, it's even harder on me. Every time I get all puffed up and pissy about some stupid woman, I remind me of his ex. That bitch is, was and always will be insane. I hate the way she treated him and I hate it when I get even remotely like that. But, this bitch in the same room, or God for-fuckin'-bid touching him, makes me go into DEFCON 4 alert mode. "Must. Kill. It."
Why?
Honestly , it seems like the only 'femaleness' about me is the crappy parts. Boobs (they get in the way when I'm trying to shoot pool), my period, long fingernails and a shitty attitude toward other females. Everything else about me is more guy than chick. Cussing, fartin', belchin', riding bulls, playing pool, working, jobs, sense of humor...everything is more guy than female with me, except those few things.
Any ideas?
I gotta go pee on Eric's leg now...markin' my territory, don'tcha know. First, I'll pee on his leg, then I'll go find her, bristles up, teeth bared, growling with drool coming out. Lovely, huh?
Well, I probably won't go that far...unless...
C'mon...if she's fuckin' a 17 year old, how much sense am I supposed to assume she has?
Besides, I'm not in those 29's. YET.
I'll be back. Pray for me. Or her. Hell, just pray.
Posted by: Stevie at 03:05 PM | Comments (52) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Oh, I can die now, by the way.
I have seen everything.
They now have a new toilet, not a bidet, that pisses back at ya. I just saw the commercial for it for the first time. They show people trying to get clean, like in a shower with no running water, with toilet paper. The point is, you wouldn't try to clean any other part of yourself with just toilet paper, so why do we do it when we go to the bathroom? Gee, I don't know. Because it works?It has this little appendage that comes out from under the back of the seat and pees at you. Then, it blows on you to get ya dry.
This one old lady says "It energized me. Isn't that strange?" Yeah. It is kinda weird for people to become sexually aroused by a toilet. Then, some guy says "I'll never go back." Okay. Well, have fun with your new girlfriend there, Buddy.
I swear.
I'll bet if you asked these people if they ever pee in the shower, they'd freak. It's okay to get a shower every time you pee, but it's not okay to pee in the shower. 'Kay. Whatever. Bye, now...
Reminds me of a guy I knew named Mike. Utterly horrified at the idea of peeing in the shower but thought nothing of licking a dollar bill to get a soda machine to accept it. EW! Fuckin' goofball.
Posted by: Stevie at 02:20 PM | Comments (51) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Why do I do it?
Why do I ever watch Emergency Vets on Animal Planet? This show-hell, this channel-and country music make me cry more often than anything else. Everytime I watch this show and an animal dies, so do I. This time, there was a dog, Buddy, who had tumors. He licked one to the point of bleeding and his family brought him in. They did x-rays, pre-surgery, and found he was riddled with cancer. When they told the family it was hopeless, the Dad started to cry.
A man crying simultaneously breaks my heart and makes me want to kill whatever hurt him so bad. I always just want to hold the guy until he's better.Women? Depends on why they're crying. If it's because they got busted cheating, they're on their own. If their animal just died, I'm right there, crying with 'em.
With men, I don't care why...I feel the same way. Men with tears are to be held. Women, I want to know why. Then, if it's their fault, tough. If it's not, I'll do what I can.
Kids? Pfft. They cry 24/7 anyway. and usually because they can't have their way. If I see a crying child and any amount of blood...different story. But, I still wanna know why the tears first.
I'm not sure what this says about me...maybe that women have treated me like shit all my life and that I know nothing about kids? Probably. Well...that's one of the reasons I do this (blog)...to try to figure out why I am like I am.
Men and animals. I love all of both groups...until I'm shown differently. Women and kids? Eh. I try to stay away from both of those groups. I do not understand women and kids make me nervous.
Speaking of women...that little bitch is back. The one that completely freaked me out that day in the parlor. The bitch is back. She gives me one freakin' reason and I will let her have it. How Billy's wife can stand to have her anywhere near him is beyond me. Not to even mention the fact that I've been told this bitch is almost thirty and she's fuckin' a kid here named Josh who is 17. Skank. Why am I not at all surprised by this? What a loser.
Oh well. Prove I'm right about ya, why don'tcha?
Whatever.
She starts her 'where do ya want me' shit this time and I will tell her 'under a bus'.
Eric, however, is crackin' me up about her. He says "She's got a fat ass." Glad ya were lookin', Bud...
She's got an ugly face...
To a blind guy, maybe...
I don't like her.
Good, then you won't mind me beatin' her head outta her ass...
I don't think she's even cute.
That's fine but she does...
Sigh....
Oh, quit worrying. If she stays the hell away from you, she's got nothing to worry about. Women. I can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em.
But...knives are quiet.
Posted by: Stevie at 02:01 PM | Comments (49) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
September 29, 2003
Okay...
What's going on when you cut & paste a URL and the link doesn't work? I tried that Yahoo picture thing and another site I wanted to link to and both times it can back 'Page cannot be displayed'. I cut & pasted the URL, so it was right. So, why didn't it work?
Posted by: Stevie at 02:39 PM | Comments (53) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
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