Woke Jesus

I like this Jesus, he sounds like Loki.

Woke Jesus pic.twitter.com/mRaDPAPGEe
— The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) May 6, 2024

At Twitchy, which is convinced that John Fuglesang (who?) is a real person that people have heard of:

Trump
Isn’t in the Bible, John., but he’s the only thing you think about.

My Jesus turned the tables over on hypocrites like you, John. Your Jesus is accurately depicted in this skit.

How does it feel when someone skewers your “faith,” a faith you do not have or practice, and…
— Nick Searcy, RESURRECTIONAL FILM & TELEVISION STAR (@yesnicksearcy) May 7, 2024

Posted by: Disinformation Expert Ace at 05:16 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Third!!!

Posted by: eleven at May 08, 2024 05:18 PM (fV+MH)

2 Pawtucket!!!

Posted by: eleven at May 08, 2024 05:18 PM (fV+MH)

3 Well there you go.

Posted by: ... at May 08, 2024 05:19 PM (id0gh)

4 Woke Jesus is hilarious..

Posted by: Boswell at May 08, 2024 05:19 PM (K+UlC)

5 Not First!!

Posted by: jmel at May 08, 2024 05:20 PM (bVhJi)

6 Wait - how can you be 1st and 11th at the same time....?

Posted by: Boswell at May 08, 2024 05:20 PM (K+UlC)

7 I knew Jesus. You , sir, are no Jesus.

Posted by: eleven at May 08, 2024 05:20 PM (fV+MH)

8 Quantum type shit.

Posted by: eleven at May 08, 2024 05:21 PM (fV+MH)

9 1 Third!!!
Posted by: eleven at May 08, 2024 05:18 PM (fV+MH)

1st, third, eleven? I demand a recount!

Posted by: Boswell at May 08, 2024 05:22 PM (K+UlC)

10 He gets us!

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 05:22 PM (uo86X)

11 Woke Jesus should be a black Trans Nonbinary Woman.

Just sayin.

Posted by: Czech Chick at May 08, 2024 05:23 PM (I6NNh)

12 Woke Jesus looks like Salty Cracker in Drag

Posted by: garrett at May 08, 2024 05:23 PM (F0kiD)

13 Woke Jesus would have been better as a black man or a white karen. Still funny though.

Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at May 08, 2024 05:23 PM (QNSds)

14 Don't even get me started on what he did with Mary Magdalene.

Posted by: huerfano at May 08, 2024 05:24 PM (VGOMa)

15 Please cite 1 actual Jesus teaching Trump or the GOP fight for. Chapter & verse, please. Just one.

-

This is all so confusing. We're SUPPOSED to vote our Christianity now?

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 05:24 PM (uo86X)

16 "There is no Jesus-based justification for Trump support."

___________________________________________

Referring to all Latinos by referencing a single Spanish name (Jesus) is kind of questionable....isn't it?

Posted by: Orson at May 08, 2024 05:24 PM (dIske)

17 14 Don't even get me started on what he did with Mary Magdalene.
Posted by: huerfano at May 08, 2024 05:24 PM (VGOMa)

Hmmmm, gives me an idea for a book …

Posted by: Dan Brown at May 08, 2024 05:25 PM (GiOtB)

18 If I had a Twitter account, I'd ask Mr. Fugelsang where the Biblical evidence is for supporting Biden. I assume that's whom he is voting for.

Posted by: bluebell - register for the NoVaMoMe! at May 08, 2024 05:25 PM (bS+DD)

19 I'm not going to spoil it, but 1:40 with Lazarus is brilliant even for the Bee.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 05:25 PM (uo86X)

20 I know someone that had to learn to play the fugelsang in middleschool. Wedgies and toilet swirlies every day is what that earned him.

Posted by: banana Dream at May 08, 2024 05:25 PM (Y6IkP)

21 Sorry, start at 130, not 1:40

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 05:25 PM (uo86X)

22 The excellent writers at the Bee understand the Marxist mind well.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 08, 2024 05:26 PM (pohLc)

23 hiya

Posted by: JT at May 08, 2024 05:26 PM (T4tVD)

24 Que?
Posted by: Jesus

Posted by: rickb223 at May 08, 2024 05:26 PM (w0gh0)

25 22 The excellent writers at the Bee understand the Marxist mind well.

You don't even need to squint to see the bottom of that pool.

Posted by: garrett at May 08, 2024 05:26 PM (F0kiD)

26 I am offended that Jesus is portrayed as having white skin and an English accent and I'm bothered by his being a male,-except that he was male. Colonialism must die!!

Posted by: DEI commander at May 08, 2024 05:27 PM (XkYcA)

27 Jesus loves everyone.

Doesn't mean he's not pissed.

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 08, 2024 05:27 PM (TKq3u)

28 Reminds me of Buddy Christ.

Posted by: tcn in AK, hail to the thief at May 08, 2024 05:27 PM (jpjFa)

29
John Fugelsang?

Is he that a-hole John Mercury Cougar Melaninkampf, author of "My Struggle Filled Life as a White Douchebag"?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 08, 2024 05:28 PM (xG4kz)

30 (Watches video, takes notes)

Posted by: United Methodist Church, Woke Doctrine For All at May 08, 2024 05:28 PM (sAmhv)

31 Woke Jesus is about how the left views him...

Posted by: lin-duh at May 08, 2024 05:28 PM (b+R3R)

32 I (WHEEEZE) don't get it. (WHEEZE)
- Garrison Keillor

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 05:28 PM (uo86X)

33 El Salvador is celebrating it's 200th anniversary, and put out a Kickass video, boasting that they are the safest country in the Western Hemisphere and Lefty's are crying because they lock up gang members

Posted by: Patrick From Ohio at May 08, 2024 05:29 PM (dKiJG)

34 People think Christianity is some kind of easy thing to pick up and wear, like a hat.
Think again.

Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 08, 2024 05:29 PM (MeG8a)

35 I followed the link to Nick Searcy's tweet and evidently this Fugelsang fellow has some sort of a talk show, somewhere.

Posted by: bluebell - register for the NoVaMoMe! at May 08, 2024 05:29 PM (bS+DD)

36 Woke Jesus pic.twitter.com/mRaDPAPGEe

==

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Posted by: runner at May 08, 2024 05:30 PM (V13WU)

37 "Fugelsang" sounds like some exotic musical instrument.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 08, 2024 05:30 PM (YqDXo)

38 10 He gets us!
Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 05:22 PM (uo86X)

Probably gets syphilis with that outlook, but then most proggies sound like their brains have been chewed by spirochetes.

Posted by: tcn in AK, hail to the thief at May 08, 2024 05:31 PM (jpjFa)

39 Is that Sean Astin in the BB clip?
Couldn't watch it all the way, I find it sacrilegious even though they are skewering the leftards.

Posted by: neverenoughcaffeine at May 08, 2024 05:31 PM (2NHgQ)

40 Hay Soos

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 08, 2024 05:31 PM (63Dwl)

41 I knew Jesus. You , sir, are no Jesus.

Posted by: eleven at May 08, 2024 05:20 PM (fV+MH)

Hey! That's Keith Richard's line!

Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at May 08, 2024 05:31 PM (DR8fH)

42 Lazarus will live again by this ballot. LOL

The people who work for the Babylon Bee much have so much fun.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 05:32 PM (XkYcA)

43 People think Christianity is some kind of easy thing to pick up and wear, like a hat.
Think again.
Posted by: gourmand du jour
-----
Well, you can just pick and choose what you agree with and change what you don't like so it's more like a scarf than a hat...///

Posted by: lin-duh at May 08, 2024 05:32 PM (b+R3R)

44 I know someone that had to learn to play the fugelsang in middleschool. Wedgies and toilet swirlies every day is what that earned him.

Posted by: banana Dream at May 08, 2024 05:25 PM (Y6IkP)
______________

Sorry, just saw this.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 08, 2024 05:32 PM (YqDXo)

45 Good afternoon everyone.

Some of the gals played the Flugelsang in hs band. Did they ever!

Posted by: Tonypete at May 08, 2024 05:32 PM (WXNFJ)

46 Their babies have an important spirit, those babies are normal. You can toss them.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at May 08, 2024 05:32 PM (J8LnB)

47 "I knew Jesus. You, sir, are no Jesus."

I know it's verboten to sock regulars, but this really should've been attributed to Vic.

Posted by: PabloD at May 08, 2024 05:32 PM (f7a6n)

48 34 People think Christianity is some kind of easy thing to pick up and wear, like a hat.
Think again.
Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 08, 2024 05:29 PM (MeG8a)

Mine usually shows up like a 2x4 to the temple when I start straying...

Posted by: tcn in AK, hail to the thief at May 08, 2024 05:32 PM (jpjFa)

49 34 People think Christianity is some kind of easy thing to pick up and wear, like a hat.
Think again.
Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 08, 2024 05:29 PM (MeG8a)

It is the most difficult endeavor one can attempt.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 08, 2024 05:32 PM (pohLc)

50 Flugelhorn

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 08, 2024 05:33 PM (63Dwl)

51
The Fugelsang was a bastardized version of the Hautboy.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 08, 2024 05:33 PM (xG4kz)

52 "Fugelsang" is perfect name for a Commie fag.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 08, 2024 05:34 PM (8zz6B)

53 9 1 Third!!!
Posted by: eleven at May 08, 2024 05:18 PM (fV+MH)

1st, third, eleven? I demand a recount!

Posted by: Boswell at May 08, 2024 05:22 PM (K+UlC)
----
I too demand a recount but in Roman Numerals with no remainders.

Posted by: Ciampino - Felice di stare lassu . at May 08, 2024 05:34 PM (qfLjt)

54 Well, you can just pick and choose what you agree with and change what you don't like so it's more like a scarf than a hat...///
Posted by: lin-duh at May 08, 2024 05:32 PM (b+R3R)

Just be careful with the scarves …

Posted by: zombie Isadora Duncan at May 08, 2024 05:34 PM (GiOtB)

55 The 'He Gets Us' commercial is basically that Babylon Bee video, but NOT satire.

I'm glad Nick Searcy skewered John Fugelsang. Well, it's ok anyway. I have no idea who John Fuglesang is. He seems dumb. Not a smart man saying dumb things, just a dumb man.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 08, 2024 05:34 PM (sAmhv)

56 Jesus, I like him very much, but he no help with a curve ball.

Posted by: tcn in AK, hail to the thief at May 08, 2024 05:34 PM (jpjFa)

57 He gets us!
-

Probably gets syphilis with that outlook, but then most proggies sound like their brains have been chewed by spirochetes.
Posted by: tcn in AK, hail to the thief

-

I think it was someone here (maybe you) that pointed out that it's not His job to get us.

The Man on the Middle Cross sermon comes to mind.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 05:34 PM (hECfr)

58 John Fuglesang (who?)

Dumb takes and misspelled his own name on Twitter once.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at May 08, 2024 05:34 PM (IG4Id)

59 I skimmed the video like I skimmed the Bible.

I get the gist.

Posted by: Field Marshal Zhukov at May 08, 2024 05:34 PM (wBaIH)

60 I don't understand this twit's thinking at all. Is there any reason to believe Jesus would endorse the party of Moloch?

Posted by: Northernlurker at May 08, 2024 05:35 PM (JLq/1)

61 the people who know the least about the Bible always seem to think they know the most, and, therefore, try to make the most asinine assertions about the Bible imaginable.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 05:36 PM (tT6L1)

62 OT

A lot of storms are popping up with hail and potential tornados across the mid-south. Mostly around North TN, some west and north in central KY (Me), IL and points both north and south.

Points west are also under threat.

It's going to be ugly tonight.

Stay safe.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at May 08, 2024 05:36 PM (Q4IgG)

63 Jesus said it was OK that we used COVID as our opportunity to launch a multi year cheating operation.

Posted by: University of Michigan Football Program at May 08, 2024 05:36 PM (+XZTA)

64 49 34 People think Christianity is some kind of easy thing to pick up and wear, like a hat.
Think again.
Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 08, 2024 05:29 PM (MeG8a)

It is the most difficult endeavor one can attempt.
Posted by: Xipe Totec
---------------------------

Indeed. I wasn't raised in the church. It's difficult to say the least.

Posted by: Braenyard - UNC, They tore down the American Flag and replaced it with a Palestinian flag. 800 'Pro at May 08, 2024 05:36 PM (lCWOD)

65 I have read the Bible. Twice. If I read it 50 more times there are many things I cannot understand.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 08, 2024 05:36 PM (pohLc)

66 Jesus : Go and sin no more

Leftist: That’s just a suggestion right?

Posted by: polynikes at May 08, 2024 05:37 PM (MNhXM)

67 I don't understand this twit's thinking at all. Is there any reason to believe Jesus would endorse the party of Moloch?
Posted by: Northernlurker

--

I think it's similar to why they keep trying to associate Trump supporters to cult members.

They're desperately trying to make Christians doubt their support. "Oh, you're cult members" or "Oh, Trump isn't obeying God" or something similar.

The only problem is that Trump did more to show he was Christ-aligned than any other president in decades.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 05:37 PM (hECfr)

68 60 I don't understand this twit's thinking at all. Is there any reason to believe Jesus would endorse the party of Moloch?
Posted by: Northernlurker at May 08, 2024 05:35 PM (JLq/1)

It is clear he never read it, or if he did, he didn't understand it or internalized any of it. There is no place in the Bible that says "Just be nice and you will get to heaven."

Posted by: tcn in AK, hail to the thief at May 08, 2024 05:38 PM (jpjFa)

69 Saw a black guy angrily arguing with a CVS tech (apparently Russian) in my quiet little liberal corner of America and would you believe this black guy felt disrespected and immediately told the Russian tech to "go back to his country".

Must have been a Trump supporter because I've been rightfully informed that only Trump supporters and Republicans are racists who hate immigrants. You don't think that was "disinformation", do you?

Posted by: ... at May 08, 2024 05:38 PM (lX8VI)

70 Love me some Nick.

Posted by: Plainoldtoast at May 08, 2024 05:38 PM (ytSiK)

71 24 Que?
Posted by: Jesus

Posted by: rickb223 at May 08, 2024 05:26 PM (w0gh0)
----
Well that could have been Manuel from Fawlty Towers .... just saying. He liked to say Que?

Posted by: Ciampino - Felice di stare lassu at May 08, 2024 05:39 PM (qfLjt)

72 I'd like to challenge Mr. Fugelsang to cite chapter and verse which justifies murdering Jews, babies and also laying around while collecting from those who actually work, etc.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 05:39 PM (tT6L1)

73
Isn't the Fugelsang a hoity-toity way of saying Sackbut?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 08, 2024 05:39 PM (xG4kz)

74 Martini Farmer - yeah, we are getting pounded with T storms and unrelenting rain. A few inches in the past days. The creek behind us is roaring down the ravine. Great fun to listen to it.

Posted by: Tonypete at May 08, 2024 05:40 PM (WXNFJ)

75 The Bible is a library. Do you understand the library? I thought so.

Posted by: Deplorable Minion at May 08, 2024 05:40 PM (TXtl1)

76 Before he was at CNN I saw Fugelsang on Comedy Central. Calling him a comedian is like calling me the centerfielder for the Yankees. He ain't funny

Posted by: Smell the Glove at May 08, 2024 05:41 PM (5S+sK)

77 Yeah, I was OK with "go", it's the "and sin no more bit" that gets tricky.

Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 08, 2024 05:41 PM (MeG8a)

78 and would you believe this black guy felt disrespected and immediately told the Russian tech to "go back to his country".

-

He probably assumed that they're all Mexicans.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 05:41 PM (ODsYZ)

79 I'm glad Nick Searcy skewered John Fugelsang. Well, it's ok anyway. I have no idea who John Fuglesang is. He seems dumb. Not a smart man saying dumb things, just a dumb man.
Posted by: Puddleglum

In regard to this, Nick Searcy was.....

JUSTIFIED!

Posted by: A face in the crowd..... at May 08, 2024 05:41 PM (vcOmj)

80 "Contractor paints over anti-Israel student protesters at Ohio’s CWRU after they refused to move"

Sprayed right over them. Ha!

Posted by: fd at May 08, 2024 05:41 PM (CM7e9)

81 tcn. Yep, you have to work at your faith constantly. I'm 29 x 2 plus and I learn something new daily. Hopefully, I'm smart enough to recognize what I'm being taught.

Posted by: neverenoughcaffeine at May 08, 2024 05:41 PM (2NHgQ)

82 They have no god therefore
Christianity is a cult, all Christians are cultists. Defeat them by defamation and division.

Posted by: Braenyard - UNC, They tore down the American Flag and replaced it with a Palestinian flag. 800 'Pro at May 08, 2024 05:42 PM (lCWOD)

83 It is the most difficult endeavor one can attempt.
Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 08, 2024 05:32 PM (pohLc)

I dunno one time I saw a guy try to fit six oranges in his mouth.

Oh nevermind, that was Kamala.

And I didn't see it.

And it wasn't oranges.

Posted by: ... at May 08, 2024 05:42 PM (lX8VI)

84 People think Christianity is some kind of easy thing to pick up and wear, like a hat.
Think again.
Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 08, 2024 05:29 PM (MeG8a)

Well, it is a hat.

But, not like a regular fedora.

It's more like one of those baseball helmet type hats with beer holders attached to the right and left and flexi-straws that reach down to your mouth when you get thirsty.

Yes! Exactly, like that!

Posted by: naturalfake at May 08, 2024 05:42 PM (eDfFs)

85 The problem with sinning no more is I probably sin 50 times a day without even realizing it.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 08, 2024 05:42 PM (pohLc)

86 I'd like to challenge Mr. Fugelsang to cite chapter and verse which justifies murdering Jews, babies and also laying around while collecting from those who actually work, etc.
Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 05:39 PM (tT6L1)

Mr. Fugelsang doesn't believe in Jesus - or he would never say the things that he says...and he well knows it.

Never try and make someone else prove their devotion to a religion that you have no clue about...

Posted by: Boswell at May 08, 2024 05:43 PM (K+UlC)

87 @neverenoughcaffeine: I've been hit with the Lord's version of a cluebyfour more than once.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 05:43 PM (tT6L1)

88
Lazarus will live again by this ballot. LOL

That was the moment my wife, watching over my shoulder and I both LOL'd together.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at May 08, 2024 05:43 PM (RKVpM)

89 I like to know what the enemy is up to so I watched a YT about 14 things the religious believe that aren't true (or something like that). The last one was that you need God for guidance and that's untrue because everybody has their own understanding of right and wrong inside themselves. Yeah, that's what we need. More Calvinball.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I've Been Through the Desert On a Horse With No Shame at May 08, 2024 05:44 PM (L/fGl)

90 OT: Dang I missed the Disney post.

Keep killing Disney theatrically in 2024. SKIP Kingdom of the Apes this weekend.

Posted by: Nova Local at May 08, 2024 05:44 PM (exHjb)

91 The Bee is now as good as Monty Python used to be.

Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 05:45 PM (unUNN)

92 Jesus is JUST all right.

Posted by: Doobie Brothers at May 08, 2024 05:46 PM (Ds3Rc)

93 There's a hilarious AI picture of "Jesus flipping over a table."

It literally has Jesus doing a back flip over a table.

Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at May 08, 2024 05:46 PM (g9W3m)

94 the people who know the least about the Bible always seem to think they know the most, and, therefore, try to make the most asinine assertions about the Bible imaginable.
Posted by: blake

There was a video TV Play of some talks by C.S. Lewis. He was raised in the Catholic Church, and then left it out of cynicism and disillusionment from what he saw in the Great War (WWI). And it was pretty terrible.

Later in life, Tolkien kind of brought him back to his faith.
CS Lewis talked about how humbly a man, any man, should approach his faith, and his belief in God. He was personally humbled by the strength in faith he saw in people that were regarded as "simpler" than himself.

He would be sharing Paradise with them.

Posted by: A face in the crowd..... at May 08, 2024 05:46 PM (vcOmj)

95 Sinning against whom? Marx? Baal? Gaia? Mahomet? Baphomet? Ra? Brandon’s staff?

Posted by: Deplorable Minion at May 08, 2024 05:47 PM (TXtl1)

96 The problem with sinning no more is I probably sin 50 times a day without even realizing it.
Posted by: Xipe Totec

Take heart. We all do.

Posted by: Tonypete at May 08, 2024 05:47 PM (/i32d)

97 @Annosaurus Wrecks: and I'll bet that video contained things the creators made up in their own head and which had nothing to do with what Christians actually believe.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 05:47 PM (tT6L1)

98 Jesus : Go and sin no more

Leftist: That’s just a suggestion right?
Posted by: polynikes

You're not the boss of me!

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I've Been Through the Desert On a Horse With No Shame at May 08, 2024 05:47 PM (L/fGl)

99 I like to know what the enemy is up to so I watched a YT about 14 things the religious believe that aren't true (or something like that). The last one was that you need God for guidance and that's untrue because everybody has their own understanding of right and wrong inside themselves....

Oct 7th showed us how well that works out.

Posted by: naturalfake at May 08, 2024 05:47 PM (eDfFs)

100 >>>The only problem is that Trump did more to show he was Christ-aligned than any other president in decades.
Posted by: Moron Robbie -
-------

Other than Jesus, is there any hero in the Bible who was perfect?

Posted by: Braenyard - UNC, They tore down the American Flag and replaced it with a Palestinian flag. 800 'Pro at May 08, 2024 05:48 PM (lCWOD)

101 39 Is that Sean Astin in the BB clip?
Couldn't watch it all the way, I find it sacrilegious even though they are skewering the leftards.
Posted by: neverenoughcaffeine
-----
THIS x a bazillion

Posted by: NALNAMSAM at May 08, 2024 05:48 PM (NtdeY)

102 If I had a Twitter account, I'd ask Mr. Fugelsang where the Biblical evidence is for supporting Biden. I assume that's whom he is voting for.
Posted by: bluebell - register for the NoVaMoMe! at May 08, 2024 05:25 PM (bS+DD)

-------------------

Methuselah

Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 05:49 PM (unUNN)

103 Personal Jesus

https://youtu.be/cNd4eocq2K0?si=F9K0bDggQcGbBJmp

Posted by: Tonypete at May 08, 2024 05:49 PM (/i32d)

104 This guy's a real psycho:
John Fugelsang @JohnFugelsang Jun 25, 2022
As A Christian, I remind you that Jesus was a gun-loving nationalist who opposed abortion, immigration, labor unions, gay rights & Communists.

Oh wait; did I say Jesus?

Sorry, I meant Hitler.
Jesus did none of that.
That was all Hitler’s agenda.

John Fugelsang @JohnFugelsang Nov 25, 2018
For I was a stranger & you tear-gassed me
I asked for asylum & you stole my children
I fled violence in my country from your drug war & you called me 'illegal'

But maybe
the next time evangelicals vote
they'll read the Gospels 1st
instead of electing
fucking Caligula
Amen.

Posted by: andycanuck (ZdexC) at May 08, 2024 05:50 PM (ZdexC)

105 The people who "know the least about the Bible" are the ones who need to be engaged... not demonized.

Or not...

Choice is a thing.

Or not.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at May 08, 2024 05:50 PM (Q4IgG)

106 Which president talked pro-life and also showed up at the pro-life rally in Dc? Who was the man who also put in place the people necessary to overturn Roe V Wade?

But Trump is a declasse heathen.

Unlike the compassionate conservative GW Bush.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 05:50 PM (tT6L1)

107 The Bee is now as good as Monty Python used to be.

==

I disagree - Pythons were a hell of a lot more irreverent toward the Church.

Posted by: runner at May 08, 2024 05:51 PM (V13WU)

108 Some people don't draw the line at baby raping.
I'm Biden and I approve this message.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at May 08, 2024 05:51 PM (J8LnB)

109 @Annosaurus Wrecks: and I'll bet that video contained things the creators made up in their own head and which had nothing to do with what Christians actually believe.
Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing

Some were kind of true. For example, that priests, pastors, elders, and what have you are capable of error and sin.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I've Been Through the Desert On a Horse With No Shame at May 08, 2024 05:52 PM (L/fGl)

110 I repeat myself but my Christian faith is to the
benefit and safety of the non-believing Left .

Posted by: polynikes at May 08, 2024 05:52 PM (MNhXM)

111 Probably gets syphilis with that outlook, but then most proggies sound like their brains have been chewed by spirochetes.
Posted by: tcn in AK, hail to the thief at May 08, 2024 05:31 PM (jpjFa)

-----------------

That makes sense. Since all progressives advocate sex of all kinds it figures that they would pick up all sorts of diseases, known and unknown.

Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 05:52 PM (unUNN)

112 Other than Jesus, is there any hero in the Bible who was perfect?
Posted by: Braenyard

Dunno - no writings survive describing our Blessed Mother taking a sandal to Jesus' behind when he ran away for three days.

Posted by: Tonypete at May 08, 2024 05:52 PM (/i32d)

113 John Fugelsang is the John Mellencamp of John Cusacks.

Posted by: mr tmz at May 08, 2024 05:52 PM (rJ48h)

114 Before Twitter, people like this Fugelsang guy used to have to resort to cardboard and sharpie markers, while moping around a filthy underpass.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at May 08, 2024 05:52 PM (+yhUM)

115 Whomever invented Clamato needs to be horsewhipped. WTF wants tomato & snizz juice?

Posted by: rickb223 at May 08, 2024 05:53 PM (w0gh0)

116 Is that Sean Astin in the BB clip?
Couldn't watch it all the way, I find it sacrilegious even though they are skewering the leftards.
Posted by: neverenoughcaffeine at May 08, 2024 05:31 PM (2NHgQ)

--------------

I noticed that too. Wouldn't it be great if more and more Hollywood defected to our side?

Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 05:53 PM (unUNN)

117 There is not way Babylon Bee would make anything like this !

https://tinyurl.com/bdewn4yw

Posted by: runner at May 08, 2024 05:54 PM (V13WU)

118 John Fugelsang is the VH-1 of Homo sapiens.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at May 08, 2024 05:54 PM (+yhUM)

119 I'm going to hazard a guess Enoch was as close to perfect as one could get. After all, Enoch walked with God all his days, and then he was not. Enoch never saw death, which indicates God was well pleased with Enoch.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 05:54 PM (tT6L1)

120 Methuselah

Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 05:49 PM (unUNN)

Methuselah was sharper at 969 than Chia Joe was at 60.

Posted by: Elisabeth G. Wolfe at May 08, 2024 05:55 PM (LLJRz)

121 I like to know what the enemy is up to so I watched a YT about 14 things the religious believe that aren't true (or something like that). The last one was that you need God for guidance and that's untrue because everybody has their own understanding of right and wrong inside themselves. Yeah, that's what we need. More Calvinball.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I've Been Through the Desert On a Horse With No Shame at May 08, 2024 05:44 PM (L/fGl)
---
I find it interesting to watch those videos because the YouTuber is so fantastically *WRONG* about their understanding of Christianity and the Bible. It's almost sad. We should pray that the Holy Spirit gives them guidance...

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at May 08, 2024 05:55 PM (BpYfr)

122 104 This guy's a real psycho:

Posted by: andycanuck

TBF, he has to be. Otherwise, nobody would know who this footnote in the history of nothing is. As it is, normal people still have to look him up because, who?

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 08, 2024 05:55 PM (sAmhv)

123 Ya know, I was always struck how Jesus "Spoke truth to power!" all the time.

He was rather savage against the Pharisee's and Sadduccees. The elites and power brokers of His day.

"Jesus is a nice hippie!" doesn't match very well with "They are whited seplechures full of dead men's bones", I'm just sayin'.

Posted by: SimoHayha at May 08, 2024 05:55 PM (N/k1H)

124 instead of electing
fucking Caligula
Amen.

How is Trump remotely like Caligula? Guy doesn't know much about Roman history in addition to the Bible, does he?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 05:55 PM (XkYcA)

125 Certain people have criticized the way i live out my faith because I do not do enough to promote lefty causes. They keep telling me that Jesus wants me to vote in a way that earns their approval and to hate the people they lie about.

It really bugs them that I try to follow Jesus, whom I have claimed as my Lord, rather than submitting to the demands of their satanic death cult that is bent on oppression and destruction.

It just blows my mind that they think I should care about their approval.

Posted by: Emmie at May 08, 2024 05:56 PM (Sf2cq)

126 Ha, ha, ha! Philly Jesus is a driver for Lyft but I have room in my life for more.

Posted by: L - If you do it with them, they'll do it to you, too at May 08, 2024 05:57 PM (NFX2v)

127 Since my wife isn't home to hear me, I'll tell anyone that cares to comment.

My colonoscopy is negative. No cancer. I had been worried.

No my thoughts go out to the people on this site who do have more worries than me. Please pray for them.

Posted by: Outside of Life at May 08, 2024 05:57 PM (89Sog)

128 How is Trump remotely like Caligula? Guy doesn't know much about Roman history in addition to the Bible, does he?
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 05:55 PM (XkYcA)
-----------

Afternoon, Fen. Biden and his family are far closer to Caligula than the left cares to admit. The left is all about projection and projecting Caligula onto PDT is ignoring the actual Caligula light which currently occupies the White House.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 05:57 PM (tT6L1)

129 How is Trump remotely like Caligula? Guy doesn't know much about Roman history in addition to the Bible, does he?
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 05:55 PM (XkYcA)

To be fair, the dude didn't pay attention to that part of history much beyond Helen Mirren's ... uh... acting. Yeah. Acting.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at May 08, 2024 05:57 PM (+yhUM)

130 I got kicked off.of Twatter the first time for calling John Fugelsang the low budget Brian Dunkleman

Posted by: Truck Monkey Report at May 08, 2024 05:57 PM (yQPBn)

131 I apologise if you've seen this before but I can't remember from where I got the link.

https://youtu.be/YwTMf79eMww

If you don't want to watch the whole thing then start at about 1:20 but it's worth seeing it all. (only 6 mins).

Posted by: Ciampino - Volare - Felice di stare lassu ..... at May 08, 2024 05:57 PM (qfLjt)

132 Is that a Hitler mustache on the Trumpet singer?

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 08, 2024 05:57 PM (di6C2)

133 Wasn't there an ace post recently about pro-Buden troll farms that are being run out of Ukraine ? yes there was. i am sure "John Fugelsang" is a member of that guild.

Posted by: runner at May 08, 2024 05:57 PM (V13WU)

134 They keep telling me that Jesus wants me to vote in a way that earns their approval and to hate the people they lie about.

. . . .

It just blows my mind that they think I should care about their approval.
Posted by: Emmie

And you will be hated by all because of My name, but it is the one who has endured to the end who will be saved.
- Matthew 10:22

Posted by: Tonypete at May 08, 2024 05:58 PM (/i32d)

135 The problem with sinning no more is I probably sin 50 times a day without even realizing it.

Posted by: Xipe Totec

It's my understanding that in order to sin, one must actively choose to depart from God's guidance.

We can't accidentally or inadvertently sin.

Posted by: Washington Nearsider at May 08, 2024 05:58 PM (Lnc8d)

136 Father Curtis: Let me see if I understand this. You're concerned that he isn't concerned that you're going to hell. And you feel that she's too bossy.

Elaine and Puddy: Yeah, that's right.

Father Curtis: Well, oftentimes in cases of inter-faith marriages, couples have difficulty--

Elaine (Interrupting): Woah, woah, woah! No one's getting married here.

Father Curtis: You aren't?

Puddy: No.

Elaine: We're just, you know, having a good time.

Father Curtis: Oh, well then it's simple. You're both going to hell.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at May 08, 2024 05:58 PM (RKVpM)

137 81 tcn. Yep, you have to work at your faith constantly. I'm 29 x 2 plus and I learn something new daily. Hopefully, I'm smart enough to recognize what I'm being taught.
Posted by: neverenoughcaffeine
----
EVERY SINGLE DAY.. make time to start each day with prayer and then spend some quality time (even if it means getting up earlier that you are used to) in the Great Book, make it a habit and allow the Lord to talk to you every day.

Also helps grow your faith by being a part of a men's/women's fellowship group (mine meets on Saturday morning in the barber shop - LOL) and find some way to volunteer in some capacity at your local church.

Learning to be more like Jesus and less like myself is a daily task all in itself...

Posted by: NALNAMSAM at May 08, 2024 05:59 PM (NtdeY)

138 that Sean Astin in the BB clip?
Couldn't watch it all the way, I find it sacrilegious even though they are skewering the leftards.
Posted by: neverenoughcaffeine at May 08, 2024 05:31 PM (2NHgQ)

--------------

I think a sense of humor is one of the greatest gifts God gave to us. Jesus had no problem using ridicule to skewer the supposed keepers of God’s word.

But I understand where you are coming from and would not make a judgement on your opinion.

Posted by: polynikes at May 08, 2024 05:59 PM (MNhXM)

139 The problem with sinning no more is I probably sin 50 times a day without even realizing it.

Posted by: Xipe Totec

--

Best way I've ever heard it put:

You can't help it if a bird flies under your porch, but you can keep it from building a nest there.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 05:59 PM (uo86X)

140 Trump is Caligula? The horse's asses in the Senate are Democrats.

Posted by: Northernlurker at May 08, 2024 06:00 PM (JLq/1)

141 Emmie. You know your worth and they are asses braying because they have zero self worth.

Posted by: neverenoughcaffeine at May 08, 2024 06:00 PM (2NHgQ)

142

"John Fugelsang is the VH-1 of Homo sapiens."

IIRC he was on VH1 or something...back when I watched cable TV.

Posted by: Dr.Rev. Senator Your Highness E Buzz Miller, Esq PhD MA MS at May 08, 2024 06:00 PM (et1vG)

143 125 ...They keep telling me that Jesus wants me to vote in a way... ...
Posted by: Emmie at May 08, 2024 05:56 PM (Sf2cq)
---------------

Anyone that's tells you he knows which way Jesus wants you to vote is out of his mind. Beware, be careful.

Posted by: Braenyard - UNC, They tore down the American Flag and replaced it with a Palestinian flag. 800 'Pro at May 08, 2024 06:01 PM (lCWOD)

144 Congrats, outside of life. Had to be a bit nerve wracking and nice to have it behind you.

/notes possible double entendre, decides to let it stand

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 06:02 PM (tT6L1)

145 125
Also, what is with these people that think because I am a Christian I must have a Pavlovian response to whatever they concoct? Someone told me how he couldn't believe Evangelicals still support Trump after he was accused of cheating with the porn actress. Because Christians are so hung up about sex, we should automatically recoil no matter how false the accusation. Never mind that we are commanded to not bear false witness and this does not mean we must believe false witness.

Posted by: Emmie at May 08, 2024 06:03 PM (Sf2cq)

146 The only problem is that Trump did more to show he was Christ-aligned than any other president in decades.
Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 05:37 PM (hECfr)

------------------

I really believed that fraud W that he was a Christian, going on about praying for guidance. Now I understand that was just a front to get the evangelical vote as he had not said a thing during Obama's misrule, the Summer of Love conflagration or any of the arrests and prosecutions of people praying near abortion clinics. Then I remembered that Laura Bush is an advocate for "choice", so much for their Christianity.

Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 06:03 PM (unUNN)

147 >>> It just blows my mind that they think I should care about their approval.
Posted by: Emmie at May 08, 2024 05:56 PM (S

It's because the whole ball of wax depends on the destruction of the individual and everyone browbeating each other into leftist ruling class cultural compliance. The simple thing you do, walking your own personal path of faith, destroys their whole scheme.

Posted by: banana Dream at May 08, 2024 06:04 PM (Y6IkP)

148 Posted by: Outside of Life at May 08, 2024 05:57 PM (89Sog

Thanks for letting us know. Good to hear.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 06:04 PM (XkYcA)

149 Dunno - no writings survive describing our Blessed Mother taking a sandal to Jesus' behind when he ran away for three days.
Posted by: Tonypete at May 08, 2024 05:52 PM (/i32d)

But she should have known where he was.

Posted by: polynikes at May 08, 2024 06:05 PM (MNhXM)

150 Other than Jesus, is there any hero in the Bible who was perfect?
Posted by: Braenyard

No. I would classify Moses as the number two guy in the Bible and he sinned so bad he couldn't get into the Promised Land.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I've Been Through the Desert On a Horse With No Shame at May 08, 2024 06:05 PM (L/fGl)

151 115 Whomever invented Clamato needs to be horsewhipped. WTF wants tomato & snizz juice?
Posted by: rickb223 at May 08, 2024 05:53 PM (w0gh0)

8 oz Clamato
2 oz Value-rite Vodka
1 tspn Milani Dill Sauce

The perfect Bloody Caesar.

Posted by: Auspex at May 08, 2024 06:05 PM (j4U/Z)

152 I really believed that fraud W that he was a Christian, going on about praying for guidance. Now I understand that was just a front to get the evangelical vote as he had not said a thing during Obama's misrule, the Summer of Love conflagration or any of the arrests and prosecutions of people praying near abortion clinics. Then I remembered that Laura Bush is an advocate for "choice", so much for their Christianity.
Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 06:03 PM (unUNN)
------------

GW will hang around the likes of Bill Clinton but thinks PDT is beneath him.

Tells me all I need to know.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 06:06 PM (tT6L1)

153 150 Other than Jesus, is there any hero in the Bible who was perfect?
Posted by: Braenyard

No. I would classify Moses as the number two guy in the Bible and he sinned so bad he couldn't get into the Promised Land.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks,
--------------------------------------------

And it wasn't for killing the Egyptian.

Posted by: Braenyard - UNC, They tore down the American Flag and replaced it with a Palestinian flag. 800 'Pro at May 08, 2024 06:07 PM (lCWOD)

154 Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 06:03 PM (unUNN)

Because he didn’t do the political things you want that means he’s not Christian? Isn’t that what we are ridiculing the Left about in this post?

Posted by: polynikes at May 08, 2024 06:07 PM (MNhXM)

155 We can't accidentally or inadvertently sin.
Posted by: Washington Nearsider at May 08, 2024 05:58 PM (Lnc8d)

There is concupiscience. A spiritual inattentiveness that leads to a proclivity to sin. (Or something like that).

But I tend not to think of sin like a lawyer. ("Is this sin? Well if this and that, then it is, but only if such and such, but then blah blah blah....")

It's easier if you get yourself a good relationship with the Lord through prayer. Real, earnest conversational prayer. Not just kneeling down for thirty seconds and shotgunning off a list of demands before you go to bed. Learn to love Him as a constant companion. As a Lord, and a Father, and Friend. He's there all day, even if you don't consider yourself actively in prayer. If you're new to the game, just say "hello" and then shut up for a good fifteen minutes or whatever. Let Him talk once in a while.

Once you cultivate that relationship, it's easier to know if you're going off the rails. Just as you know if your friend or your parents are going to be unhappy with you for doing something before you even do it, because you already know what they would want. You don't need an algorithm for that.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at May 08, 2024 06:07 PM (+yhUM)

156 Lord, what must I do to be saved?

Be less white.

OK, guess I'll get a tan tomorrow.

Posted by: wth at May 08, 2024 06:08 PM (v0R5T)

157 He who is without sin, cast the first stone

Posted by: It's me donna at May 08, 2024 06:08 PM (Akjoo)

158 "Do not be afraid,...for Lazarus will live again — through this mail-in ballot" has meme potential

Posted by: runner at May 08, 2024 06:09 PM (V13WU)

159 " Someone told me how he couldn't believe Evangelicals still support Trump after he was accused of cheating with the porn actress."

We're not voting for a perfect person There isn't one. We're not voting for a Messiah. We're voting for a person who we will feel is best to lead the country and whose policies we support.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 06:09 PM (XkYcA)

160 It's because the whole ball of wax depends on the destruction of the individual and everyone browbeating each other into leftist ruling class cultural compliance. The simple thing you do, walking your own personal path of faith, destroys their whole scheme.
Posted by: banana Dream at May 08, 2024 06:04 PM (Y6IkP)

Christianity must be destroyed because God has bestowed dignity upon humans and the left hates anything that stands in the way of their quest of being a god over others.

Posted by: Emmie at May 08, 2024 06:09 PM (Sf2cq)

161 154 Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 06:03 PM (unUNN)

Because he didn’t do the political things you want that means he’s not Christian? Isn’t that what we are ridiculing the Left about in this post?
Posted by: polynikes at May 08, 2024 06:07 PM (MNhXM)
-----------------------------------------------------------

Instead of fulfilling his oath to the Republic he helped undermine it.

Posted by: Braenyard - UNC, They tore down the American Flag and replaced it with a Palestinian flag. 800 'Pro at May 08, 2024 06:10 PM (lCWOD)

162 He who is without sin, cast the first stone

Posted by: It's me donna

=====

Sure, but I can't promise it'll get to the catcher.

Posted by: Barrack at May 08, 2024 06:11 PM (+XZTA)

163 He who is without sin, cast the first stone
-

One of my favorite CS Lewis observations comes from that. It's about how that shows the authenticity of the Bible.

Because if it were fiction the reader would know what Jesus wrote.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Little girls dreamt of being moms, women told them not to follow their dreams at May 08, 2024 06:11 PM (ODsYZ)

164 "You have heard that it was said, 'Hate your enemies,' but I say to you...this is correct ! And here's a handy little chart to help you understand who your enemy is based on Marxist intersectionality theory."

Posted by: runner at May 08, 2024 06:11 PM (V13WU)

165 He who is without sin, cast the first stone
Posted by: It's me donna

"So this old lady walks over with a monster rock and smashes her head in."

"Aw, Mom. . . . "
-- Jesus

(ancient Catholic joke)

Posted by: Tonypete at May 08, 2024 06:11 PM (/i32d)

166 We're not voting for a perfect person There isn't one. We're not voting for a Messiah. We're voting for a person who we will feel is best to lead the country and whose policies we support.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 06:09 PM (XkYcA)

Also, Ms. Daniels is obviously lying and just trying to harass Trump and earn points from the left.

Posted by: Emmie at May 08, 2024 06:12 PM (Sf2cq)

167 I guess he is unaware shitler enacted strict gun control

Posted by: steevy at May 08, 2024 06:12 PM (FQmDC)

168 Jesus fed the multitudes with fish and bread, and he did that every day, so no one had to work ever again.

Posted by: illiniwek at May 08, 2024 06:12 PM (Cus5s)

169 GW will hang around the likes of Bill Clinton but thinks PDT is beneath him.

Tells me all I need to know.
Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 06:06 PM (tT6L1)

You will know them by their fruits.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 08, 2024 06:12 PM (pohLc)

170 I've never even heard of this dorkmeyer before. But I'm pretty out of it tv-wise. He does a talk show I guess? I haven't watched network tv, late night tv, most any of that for more than a decade. And I know the gen z'ers and the next, alpha generation? they don't really watch either.

A hard damn rain is coming for all these mouth breathers.

Posted by: banana Dream at May 08, 2024 06:12 PM (Y6IkP)

171 You will know them by their fruits.
Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 08, 2024 06:12 PM (pohLc)

Yeah, they do pretty much both hang out with the same circle of fruits, don't they?

Posted by: Warai-otoko at May 08, 2024 06:13 PM (+yhUM)

172 The campaign against Christian nationalists seems to have flopped.
How many people saw the Rob Reiner film?

Posted by: Northernlurker at May 08, 2024 06:13 PM (JLq/1)

173 Posted by: Emmie at May 08, 2024 06:12 PM (Sf2cq)

All that, and I think she's being paid off.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 06:13 PM (XkYcA)

174 " Someone told me how he couldn't believe Evangelicals still support Trump after he was accused of cheating with the porn actress."

"accused"

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 08, 2024 06:13 PM (cOq4q)

175 I was checking out a RINO candidate in my burg.
To see where she’s getting funding. She donated money to another candidate. That candidate donated money to a 3rd candidate, who then donated money to the RINO. And each of them got money from all sorts of PACs like chamber of commerce, realtors association, beer and wine distributors, auto dealers association, list goes on and on.

But she’s a severely conservative who conserve according to her website.

It’s all a grift up and down the board.

Posted by: Montec at May 08, 2024 06:14 PM (Y6Wgg)

176 174 " Someone told me how he couldn't believe Evangelicals still support Trump after he was accused of cheating with the porn actress."

"accused"
Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 08, 2024 06:13 PM (cOq4q)

That stuff old Stormy was claiming was out there

Posted by: It's me donna at May 08, 2024 06:14 PM (Akjoo)

177 Instead of fulfilling his oath to the Republic he helped undermine it.

Posted by: Braenyard - UNC, They tore down the American Flag and replaced it with a Palestinian flag. 800 'Pro at May 08, 2024 06:10 PM (lCWOD)

Like what. Helping shut down the country?

Posted by: polynikes at May 08, 2024 06:14 PM (MNhXM)

178 I don't think Trump ever bedded Daniels.

Why on earth would he? He had the pick of the litter on one hand and on the other he had money to buy any prostitute on earth and he bought her. Really?
nope

Posted by: Braenyard - UNC, They tore down the American Flag and replaced it with a Palestinian flag. 800 'Pro at May 08, 2024 06:16 PM (lCWOD)

179
I'm pretty sure the 'gold standard' for courtroom testimony has long been established by those in the pron industry.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at May 08, 2024 06:16 PM (RKVpM)

180 All that, and I think she's being paid off.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 06:13 PM (XkYcA)

So you think a notorious prostitute who did any perverted thing on camera for money would stoop to lying for cash?

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 08, 2024 06:16 PM (pohLc)

181 John Fugelsand comes from the school of Michael Moore.

On YT about a decade ago, "MM & JF on Humor: The Majority of Americans Believe What We Believe"

Nosiree but you do you.

Also: "MM & JF at Left Forum 2013: Humor and Activism"

Posted by: L - If they do it with you, they'll do it to you, too at May 08, 2024 06:17 PM (NFX2v)

182 Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 06:03 PM (unUNN)
------------

GW will hang around the likes of Bill Clinton but thinks PDT is beneath him.

Tells me all I need to know.
Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 06:06 PM (tT6L1)

Not to mentioned lied his way into wars that saw the slaughter of hundreds of thousands of people around the globe.

That's not very Christian either.

Posted by: BurtTC at May 08, 2024 06:17 PM (dGCAG)

183 'The Left' is about domination and enslavement.

Religion is a rival for authority to the left.

Posted by: davidt at May 08, 2024 06:17 PM (SYTee)

184
Like what. Helping shut down the country?
Posted by: polynikes
--------------------

Your slip is showing.

Posted by: Braenyard - UNC, They tore down the American Flag and replaced it with a Palestinian flag. 800 'Pro at May 08, 2024 06:18 PM (lCWOD)

185 "The DIGNITY of this court must be respected!
Now, bring on the porn star.

Posted by: Judge Merchan at May 08, 2024 06:18 PM (MeG8a)

186 Since my wife isn't home to hear me, I'll tell anyone that cares to comment.

My colonoscopy is negative. No cancer. I had been worried.

No my thoughts go out to the people on this site who do have more worries than me. Please pray for them.

Posted by: Outside of Life

Congratulations!

Posted by: rickb223 at May 08, 2024 06:18 PM (pR9et)

187 >>> The campaign against Christian nationalists seems to have flopped.
How many people saw the Rob Reiner film?
Posted by: Northernlurker at May 08, 2024 06:13 PM (JLq/1)

Princess Bride? yes. After that I saw when harry met sally on tv and then tapped out.

I have no further interest in meathead

Posted by: banana Dream at May 08, 2024 06:19 PM (Y6IkP)

188 So you are saying, Your anus is an open book?

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at May 08, 2024 06:19 PM (J8LnB)

189 Somebody I know and I'm friendly with wrote to me and said that they didn't worship Trump. I think they're actually an old time liberal and neither a Christian nor Jewish, but can't stand Trump. I wrote back, "I had no doubt you didn't worship Trump, and not being part of a college community I think I know far more Republican and Independent voters than you do, and none of them worship Trump. He didn't write back a response to that.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 06:19 PM (XkYcA)

190 I don't think Trump ever bedded Daniels.

Why on earth would he? He had the pick of the litter on one hand and on the other he had money to buy any prostitute on earth and he bought her. Really?
nope
Posted by: Braenyard

Especially considering he's a known germaphobe.

Posted by: rickb223 at May 08, 2024 06:19 PM (pR9et)

191 I don't think Trump ever bedded Daniels.

Why on earth would he? He had the pick of the litter on one hand and on the other he had money to buy any prostitute on earth and he bought her. Really?
nope
Posted by: Braenyard - UNC, They tore down the American Flag and replaced it with a Palestinian flag. 800 'Pro at May 08, 2024 06:16 PM (lCWOD)

She said he did, he said he didn't. Then she said he didn't, and he continued to say he didn't. Then she said he did, and he still said he didn't.

I'm having a hard time with this notion that we're supposed to believe he did.

Posted by: BurtTC at May 08, 2024 06:19 PM (dGCAG)

192 Your own Woke Jesus
Someone to hear your Humble Brag
Someone who hangs with fag hags
Your own Woke Jesus
Someone to support single Payer
Someone who's there

Posted by: rhennigantx at May 08, 2024 06:20 PM (ENQN6)

193 Do these holier than thou critics believe Joe is worthy of support from Christians? And why do none of them suggest praying for Trump?

Posted by: Northernlurker at May 08, 2024 06:20 PM (JLq/1)

194 183 'The Left' is about domination and enslavement.

Religion is a rival for authority to the left.
Posted by: davidt at May 08, 2024 06:17 PM (SYTee

Exactly.

Posted by: Emmie at May 08, 2024 06:20 PM (Sf2cq)

195 Also: "MM & JF at Left Forum 2013: Humor and Activism"

Posted by: L - If they do it with you, they'll do it to you, too at May 08, 2024 06:17 PM (NFX2v)

Heh.

A dude who's as funny as a splenectomy and another dude who's as active as a sloth with a spinal cord injury.

Great casting, bruh.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at May 08, 2024 06:21 PM (+yhUM)

196 Jesus could hit a curveball like you wouldn't believe
AND
he could throw a boat over a hedge

Posted by: Don Black at May 08, 2024 06:21 PM (/7KEl)

197 Not to mentioned lied his way into wars that saw the slaughter of hundreds of thousands of people around the globe.

That's not very Christian either.
Posted by: BurtTC
--------------------------

We should have gone to war. We should have bombed the hell out of them ASAP after the towers were hit. When we did go in after the initial take down - which was quick - he piddle fucked around then turned it over to bureaucrats. Deep Screw x2

Posted by: Braenyard - UNC, They tore down the American Flag and replaced it with a Palestinian flag. 800 'Pro at May 08, 2024 06:21 PM (lCWOD)

198 Fugelsang's one claim to fame is being a cohost of America's Funniest Home Videos for one season with the smoking hot Daisy Fuentes, between Bob Saget's and Tom Bergeron's tenures. It was a LONG time ago.

Posted by: JohnFNotKerry at May 08, 2024 06:21 PM (IL8pV)

199 > The campaign against Christian nationalists seems to have flopped.

I still have no idea what a Christian nationalist is, or why their beliefs are bad.

Posted by: bonhomme at May 08, 2024 06:21 PM (Odg76)

200 I agree that I don't think trumpy banged Stormy. She a used truck stop 3 . Now Karen MacDougal is a different story

Posted by: Smell the Glove at May 08, 2024 06:22 PM (5S+sK)

201 Well Jesus wouldn't be a leader of Marxism
They murdered hundreds of millions, prisoners of millions

Posted by: Skip at May 08, 2024 06:22 PM (fwDg9)

202 193 Do these holier than thou critics believe Joe is worthy of support from Christians? And why do none of them suggest praying for Trump?
Posted by: Northernlurker at May 08, 2024 06:20 PM (JLq/1)

The guy criticizing Evangelicals was telling me what a great, sincere Catholic Biden is.

Posted by: Emmie at May 08, 2024 06:23 PM (Sf2cq)

203 I still have no idea what a Christian nationalist is, or why their beliefs are bad.
Posted by: bonhomme at May 08, 2024

Point taken.

Posted by: Northernlurker at May 08, 2024 06:23 PM (JLq/1)

204 Jesus fed the multitudes with fish and bread, and he did that every day, so no one had to work ever again.
Posted by: illiniwek at May 08, 2024 06:12 PM (Cus5s)

Also famously said if someone is accused of banging a pron "star," you should stone his arse.

And yes, Jesus used air quotes around the word "star."

Posted by: BurtTC at May 08, 2024 06:23 PM (dGCAG)

205 196 Jesus could hit a curveball like you wouldn't believe
AND
he could throw a boat over a hedge
Posted by: Don Black at May 08, 2024 06:21 PM (/7KEl)

He knew where to fish
Told people to build on rocks
Changed water to wine
Ask a thief to come with Him to Heaven

Posted by: rhennigantx at May 08, 2024 06:23 PM (ENQN6)

206 I still have no idea what a Christian nationalist is, or why their beliefs are bad.
Posted by: bonhomme at May 08, 2024 06:21 PM (Odg76)

It's a made up boogyman like nazi. A strawman the left uses to demonize those who oppose their totalitarian society.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 08, 2024 06:24 PM (pohLc)

207 Jesus' poker face was 100% unreadable.

Posted by: davidt at May 08, 2024 06:25 PM (SYTee)

208 203 I still have no idea what a Christian nationalist is, or why their beliefs are bad.
Posted by: bonhomme at May 08, 2024

Point taken.
Posted by: Northernlurker at May 08, 2024 06:23 PM (JLq/1)

1. Try to take care of your life morally and fiscally
2. Think about your fellow country men before others
3. Contribute
4. Asked to be left alone in most details

Posted by: rhennigantx at May 08, 2024 06:25 PM (ENQN6)

209 Nood in Frisco

Posted by: She Hobbit (out and about in Middle Earth) at May 08, 2024 06:26 PM (oXbsS)

210 I'll just point out that the phrase is 'Only 'God' and Jack Nicklaus can hit a 1 iron', not 'God, Jesus and Jack Nicklaus.'

Hmmm?

Although, wouldn't, by the Trinity, that mean Jesus can hit a 1 iron?

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 08, 2024 06:26 PM (di6C2)

211 Jesus could hit a curveball like you wouldn't believe
AND
he could throw a boat over a hedge
Posted by: Don Black at May 08, 2024 06:21 PM (/7KEl)

Skeet shooting champ of Galilee, three years running.

Posted by: BurtTC at May 08, 2024 06:26 PM (dGCAG)

212 We should have gone to war. We should have bombed the hell out of them ASAP after the towers were hit. When we did go in after the initial take down - which was quick - he piddle fucked around then turned it over to bureaucrats. Deep Screw x2
Posted by: Braenyard -

What was his name... Dan Bremmer?
That is when it turned to shit but the pile wasn't complete until Biden Junta bailed out of A'stan.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 08, 2024 06:27 PM (cOq4q)

213 'Christian Nationalist' was made up by people who believe Church and State are supposed to be one and the same.

Posted by: davidt at May 08, 2024 06:27 PM (SYTee)

214 Hey that story of the 4 cops shot and killed while serving a warrant seems to have disappeared

Posted by: Don Black at May 08, 2024 06:28 PM (/7KEl)

215 Remember kids:
Removing a Republican Speaker with votes from the Democrats is double-plus bad.

But saving a Republican Speaker with Democrats votes is double-plus good!

I fear the RINOs in the House are now following the disastrous path of RINOs in TX: Better their squish-- who will stop any conservatives-- than any conservative.
It's taken decades to finally winnow out enough RINOs where we can finally see next session may see an actual conservative TX house speaker.

Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at May 08, 2024 06:29 PM (g9W3m)

216 Thats where I heard of Fuglestank

Posted by: Skip at May 08, 2024 06:29 PM (fwDg9)

217 I think the idea behind "Christian Nationalist" is the idea that they supposedly want to establish a theocracy.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 06:29 PM (XkYcA)

218 would Jesus have liked pickleball?

Posted by: Don Black at May 08, 2024 06:29 PM (/7KEl)

219 Actually Truml wants you to be Christian like, free and happy

Posted by: Skip at May 08, 2024 06:30 PM (fwDg9)

220 There was a video TV Play of some talks by C.S. Lewis. He was raised in the Catholic Church, and then left it out of cynicism and disillusionment from what he saw in the Great War (WWI). And it was pretty terrible.

----------
Lewis was raised in the Church of Ireland, a part of the Church of England. Not Catholic at all. After his conversion, he remained a member of the Church of England.
Just to clear that up...

Posted by: sal: tolle adversarium et afflige inimicum at May 08, 2024 06:32 PM (IZjwR)

221 Is CNN finally trying to be fair? Or is this just the left attempting to shunt Biden to the side?

Erin Burnett confused the old fart with some real data on the economy.

http://tiny.cc/jjs0yz

Posted by: bonhomme at May 08, 2024 06:32 PM (Odg76)

222 127/My colonoscopy is negative. No cancer. I had been worried.

No my thoughts go out to the people on this site who do have more worries than me. Please pray for them.

Posted by: Outside of Life at

Super news! And whatever caused you worry, I hope you discovered the source so you can treat it.

Posted by: Piper at May 08, 2024 06:32 PM (pZEOD)

223 Somebody I know and I'm friendly with wrote to me and said that they didn't worship Trump.
---
My worship is wavering since I never got the orange robe I was promised ....

How do I get that in the Agenda for the next cult meeting?

Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at May 08, 2024 06:33 PM (g9W3m)

224 God doesn't care one little bit who wins our elections. Jesus was playing a completely different game, for our eternal souls. That's why they didn't understand Him when they thought He was a messiah who was going to lead a revolt against the Romans. The world is a sinful place and it's always going to be a sinful place. We were born sinners and we'll always be sinners. Only by grace are we saved.

Posted by: Caesar North of the Rubicon at May 08, 2024 06:33 PM (r5tfK)

225 I still haven't received the Golden Scalp Weasel Headpiece.

Posted by: davidt at May 08, 2024 06:34 PM (SYTee)

226 Jesus fed the multitudes with fish and bread, and he did that every day, so no one had to work ever again.
Posted by: illiniwek

Dude, you're thinking of Marx.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I've Been Through the Desert On a Horse With No Shame at May 08, 2024 06:34 PM (L/fGl)

227 Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at May 08, 2024 06:33 PM (g9W3m)

I know. It's so dumb, isn't it?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 08, 2024 06:36 PM (XkYcA)

228 A Marxist Theocracy is what they want

Posted by: Skip at May 08, 2024 06:36 PM (fwDg9)

229 he couldn't believe Evangelicals still support Trump after he was accused of cheating with the porn actress. Because Christians are so hung up about sex, we should automatically recoil no matter how false the accusation. Never mind that we are commanded to not bear false witness and this does not mean we must believe false witness.
Posted by: Emmie at May 08, 2024 06:03 PM (Sf2cq)

----------------

Hypocrisy is the national religion at the moment. The people who are the worst adulterers and false witnesses are persecuting and prosecuting their enemies or just those who point out these sins. I hopeful that truth will prevail.

Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 06:37 PM (unUNN)

230 I still haven't received the Golden Scalp Weasel Headpiece.
--
Wait! You guys are getting headpieces?

All I got when I joined was a handshake and a "I'm a MAGA!" bumper sticker.

Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at May 08, 2024 06:37 PM (g9W3m)

231 Because he didn’t do the political things you want that means he’s not Christian? Isn’t that what we are ridiculing the Left about in this post?
Posted by: polynikes at May 08, 2024 06:07 PM (MNhXM)

---------------

How about living his faith particularly when Bush made such a big deal about it?

Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 06:40 PM (unUNN)

232 142
'IIRC he was on VH1 or something'

Whatever he was before, he's nothing but a fruit now.
By their fruits shall the Left be known.

Posted by: Peter Rabbit at May 08, 2024 06:40 PM (roH4R)

233
I'm having a hard time with this notion that we're supposed to believe he did.
Posted by: BurtTC at May 08, 2024 06:19 PM (dGCAG)
--------------

Someone here had the best take, I think, on the whole did he or didn't he Daniels thing: PDT is a noted germophobe, and, as such, no way he'd get anywhere near someone like Daniels.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 06:41 PM (tT6L1)

234 The high point of Fugelsangs career was being on America's Funniest Home video's with Daisy Fuentes.

Posted by: TC at May 08, 2024 06:42 PM (cHOHf)

235 Leftists lurve them some American flag, Constitution and Bible, when they think it will score them some sick burns on those frightening Christian Nationalists.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1) at May 08, 2024 06:45 PM (tT6L1)

236 'The Left' is about domination and enslavement.

Religion is a rival for authority to the left.
Posted by: davidt at May 08, 2024 06:17 PM (SYTee)

---------------

No wonder they are so in tune with Islam and are dishing up to it. They think they will simply get rid of them when they rule the whole world, I say they will find out differently.

Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 06:48 PM (unUNN)

237 How about living his faith particularly when Bush made such a big deal about it? Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 06:40 PM (unUNN)

43's church, the United Methodists, last week threw out all their prohibitions of homos and they are full-on rainbow flag fliers now. The church he grew up in, the Episcopalians, went that direction decades ago. The Methodists still haven't gone quite pro-abortion yet (right now it's something that women making a difficult decision should be counseled about), but that'll be next. Bush WAS living his faith.

Posted by: Caesar North of the Rubicon at May 08, 2024 06:48 PM (r5tfK)

238 Do these holier than thou critics believe Joe is worthy of support from Christians? And why do none of them suggest praying for Trump?
Posted by: Northernlurker at May 08, 2024 06:20 PM (JLq/1)

----------------

Because prayer is a foreign concept to them.

Posted by: Decaf at May 08, 2024 06:49 PM (unUNN)

239 Not to mentioned lied his way into wars that saw the slaughter of hundreds of thousands of people around the globe.

That's not very Christian either.
Posted by: BurtTC at May 08, 2024 06:17 PM (dGCAG)

I know an America that is whiny and toothless and will not defend itself under any circumstances has a special appeal to you, but rest assured, I’d much rather see people punched in the face for 9/11/01.

Turning the other cheek only works to a point.

Go learn some Mandarin to go with your bomb shelter project.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 08, 2024 06:58 PM (Ds3Rc)

240 John Fugelsang was the co-host of America's Funniest Video after its first revamp when Bob Saget left the show.

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