Support




Contact
Ace:
aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com
CBD:
cbd.aoshq at gee mail.com
Buck:
buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com
joe mannix:
mannix2024 at proton.me
MisHum:
petmorons at gee mail.com
Powered by
Movable Type





Is This Something?
Answer: Yes, This Is Something

Trailer for new Mission: Impossible movie, Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning Part One.

I knew they were filming two movies back-to-back; I didn't know it was supposed to be one big story.

Eh. I don't love that part of it, but I think they're just doing that because all of their plots are the same plot (guy is going to blow up the world) and here they've come up with a new wrinkle on that plot, and making the two movies two parts of one story lets them use that same plot twice.

That plot?

Well, check out the trailer.

For those of you who don't feel like watching it, the evil plot, fronted by McKittrick (the CIA chief from the first Mission Impossible movie, way back in 1996 or whatever) is that the New World Order has decided it wants to decide what "truth" is forever more, and they're telling Ethan Hunt he can either get on board with The Regime or he can get dead.

It's like they made this movie for me.

Quitting James Bond was never so easy. (I still haven't seen No Time to Die and someone sent me the Blu-Ray; I could watch it, but I just don't feel like it.)

And I don't know how much I trust Grace Randolph but she squeed over Top Gun: Maverick.

She's not alone; it has a 96% Rotten Tomatoes score, and since this is a near-zero "Representation" movie (it's almost all dudes), it can only be earning that score the old fashioned way: Through industry payoffs.

Or, possibly, the second-oldest-fashioned way, because it's good.

I might actually see it in the theaters.

By the way, I bought the UHD version of The Northman. Apologies for hyping this movie in the sidebar after just seeing a few reviews. It's... not great. I'd say it's interesting, maybe admirable. It's daring and defiant in that it flouts all of the current rules of political correctness and social responsibility...

But it's not great and it's not fun.

The movie is based on the Viking legend of a vengeance quest, the story that inspired Hamlet (though that was much-changed for the play). But the director, how do I say this, subverts your genre expectations by making the quest for vengeance as ugly, bloody, brutal, ignoble, cheap, deflating, and unsatisfying a thing as possible.

Just a quick example. From the trailer, you know that the bad guy killed his father and seized his throne. Well, when Amleth, the son of the murdered man, comes of age and sets out for vengeance (why did he wait so long? dude's like 30), the bad guy is no longer a king or earl or whatever he was. King Harold of Norway didn't like that he had killed the former king and so had kicked him out of his throne. The bad guy actually wound up fleeing and is, per a report Amleth hears, "now just a sheep-farmer in Iceland."

That's not exactly true; he's more like a colonist attempting to build a homestead and grow his own little mini-kingdom.

But right there, early on, the bad guy is taken down in stature from the King Who Stole My Father's Crown to someone who has already had the stolen crown taken back from him, and been forced to flee his own country, and is now... just raising sheep with a small household and a dozen armed men under his control.

Sure Amleth still wants his vengeance but the bad guy isn't exactly Darth Vader any more, is he? There is no longer any idea of "freeing a kingdom" here.

It's not just "Now it's personal." It's now, "Now it's only personal."

And the movie does that deliberately. And throughout the story, it deliberately subverts the expected tropes of the vengeance story.

The first time we see adult Amleth, he's a berserker with a Viking tribe conducting a raid on a peaceful village in Russia. And they're just killing villagers to plunder them.

And, while Amleth himself does not participate in the nastiness that follows -- he just kills the men who are valiantly defending their village from raiders -- the rest of the Vikings do what Vikings do with captured women.

They also enslave able-bodied young people and sell them into servitude.

And they execute young men and little boys, presumably to make sure that none of them get any of their own ideas about vengeance.

As I said, Amleth is not an active participant in that stuff, but he also doesn't object. And it's no surprise to him -- he's been doing this a while, he knows what the post-victory procedures are.

Some may appreciate this kind of non-prettified, non-Hollywooded-up look at the brutal reality of life in 895 A.D., when a moose bit my sister.

The hero is deliberately made not a hero. He's an anti-hero.

He's also not very interesting.

It's hard to find a real rooting interest here.

Also there's not much action here. There is some scattered brutal violence, but little action. The distinction I'm making is between "action" as a sort of combat sport in which both sides in the contest have a realistic chance of winning, so the outcome is in doubt, and so there's tension and excitement.

A fair fight, in other words.

Violence, on the other hand, includes killing a drunken guard by surprise. It's not a fight, it's just butchery. I don't object to it -- most of the people killed live by the sword themselves, and would not refrain from killing a drunken man by surprise themselves (or a woman or child, for that matter) -- but there's no excitement or tension in it.


The director is attempting to tell a "realistic" vengeance story, and a "realistic" take on what the story that inspired the legend really might have gone like. (Well, except for the constant real-not-imagined intercession of the Norse gods and Norns and witches.*)

And while I can respect that, I am sad to say that an emotionally, morally realistic vengeance story is not a very exciting, engaging, or exciting thing to watch.

I have to also stress it's not a bad movie. I think it's smart and well-made. I don't object to what Robert Eggers is attempting here and I do admire his guts in doing it.

But... having really hyped this in the sidebar, I feel I have to offer up a review and take that hype back.

As I said, no fun. It's not bad. If you're interested, watch it. Just don't take any special pains to watch it and don't pay a lot of money to see it.

Just watch Conan the Barbarian again. You might think that's brutal, but notably, Conan never attacks an innocent in that. Even the camel had it coming.


* And speaking of Conan: Here's another subvert-genre-expectations thing he does. In Conan, the gods are kept off-screen and magic is kept pretty minimal, with one big exception (Conan's resurrection). That's because the filmmakers there wanted to make this fantastic world seem real to you.

In The Northman, the film throws much more magic at you, and magic intrudes a lot more than it does in Conan. That's because the director has the opposite goal that John Milius did in Conan: Milius wanted to make the fantastic world realistic and seem like a world you know, but here, Robert Eggers wants to make the real historical world seem like a fantastical world that you don't know at all, and a strange, alien place.

It's interesting but I don't know if I love it. And no, the magic can't just be in Amleth's head or something; he gets specific direction and prophecy from supernatural guides that are accurate and point him correctly to things he needs and places he must go.

Also, one more fun Conan thing: There is a scene here directly, and I do mean directly, out of the Conan movie. Though it's such a classic sort of fantasy scene that I'm sure it came from a dozen other stories.

Anyway, Amleth goes on a brief mini-quest that is straight from the Conan movie. But in the Conan movie, the supernatural element was only briefly suggested, and probably didn't even happen at all, whereas here, oh baby, they turn it up to 11.

I just find it interesting that Eggers keeps doing this, turning the "Fantasy Supernatural" dial up to its highest setting in a story that takes place in the real world.


Posted by: Ace at 03:50 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 sponge

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 03:49 PM (LvTSG)

2 That trailer is dope af.

And they were planning on filming them back to back, but they had to can the idea because of covid delay costs. The next one (Dead Reckoning Part 2) just started filming a couple of months ago.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 03:50 PM (LvTSG)

3 By the way, I bought the UHD version of The Northman. Apologies for hyping this movie in the sidebar after just seeing a few reviews. It's... not great. I'd say it's interesting, maybe admirable. It's daring and defiant in that it flouts all of the current rules of political correctness and social responsibility...

But it's not great and it's not fun.

=========

I pretty much came to the same conclusion.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 03:51 PM (LvTSG)

4 The only movie I even considered seeing (lately) at the theater was Father Stu. But there was much profanity and the only pyrsyn who would accompany me gets triggered by a lot of F-bombs.

Posted by: kallisto at May 23, 2022 03:52 PM (DJFLF)

5 Ace, I can see you have reservations about Viking movies but what about Gladiator movies? Do you like to shower with grown men?

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 03:53 PM (8Sqzu)

6 Biden belongs on Mt Rushmore. He is the greatest president

Posted by: Kaye in Maine at May 23, 2022 03:53 PM (F+uXE)

7 Is Cruise starting to show his age? It's the Endtimes, I tells ya.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 03:53 PM (fvaUx)

8 OT, sorry
Don't look now, but Dr. Kissinger is speaking at Davos.
He's saying we ought to dial down the whole poking the Russian bear thing.

Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 23, 2022 03:54 PM (jTmQV)

9 Biden belongs on Mt Rushmore. He is the greatest president
Posted by: Kaye in Maine at May 23, 2022 03:53 PM (F+uXE)

More like Mt Touchmore.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 23, 2022 03:54 PM (43LzH)

10 In The Northman, the film throws much more magic at you, and magic intrudes a lot more than it does in Conan. That's because the director has the opposite goal that John Milius did in Conan: Milius wanted to make the fantastic world realistic and seem like a world you know, but here, Robert Eggers wants to make the real historical world seem like a fantastical world that you don't know at all, and a strange, alien place.

=========

Almost all of the magic can be handwaved away as perception stuff, like the crows freeing Amleth. Did they free him, or did the girl do it? The scene is from his point of view, so we see his warped perception of things.

It's similar to how he explained that The Witch could be (emphasis on could be) a series of hallucinations brought on by a fungus growing on the corn (that we do see in the movie).

He's straddling a line, and I think that part mostly works (the sword only being drawn at night is the one thing I don't think works on the magical side of things...it makes a certain choice completely arbitrary just to keep the movie going).

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 03:54 PM (LvTSG)

11 I pretty much came to the same conclusion.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 03:51 PM (LvTSG)



If you think of it as an actual Norse ballad it make sense.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 03:54 PM (fvaUx)

12 7 Is Cruise starting to show his age? It's the Endtimes, I tells ya.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 03:53 PM (fvaUx)


I'm really astonished that the Immortality Juice Ron Hubbard sold him didn't take.

Posted by: kallisto at May 23, 2022 03:54 PM (DJFLF)

13 All the values in it are Norse values.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 03:54 PM (fvaUx)

14
Fast & Furious. Original movie + plus 8 remakes.
Same for Pirates of the Carribbean.

Same for Mission Impossible.
It's the Same Movie, nine times over.

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 03:55 PM (SfHsb)

15 Does the Angel of Death appear in the Northman?

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 03:55 PM (8Sqzu)

16 14 Same for Mission Impossible.
It's the Same Movie, nine times over.
Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 03:55 PM (SfHsb)

========

That's fine, as long as they still entertain.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 03:55 PM (LvTSG)

17
Creativity in Hollywood: take something successful and flog it to death.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 23, 2022 03:55 PM (/U27+)

18 I liked the Northman but I'm not clamoring to watch it again. Ugly, violent world with no real hero, and it ends appropriately enough.

Posted by: brak at May 23, 2022 03:55 PM (j5Tg0)

19 "Viking" doesn't describe a people or a geographic region.
It's an occupation.

Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 23, 2022 03:56 PM (jTmQV)

20 Does the Angel of Death appear in the Northman?
Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 03:55 PM (8Sqzu)



There is a blind Seer.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 03:56 PM (fvaUx)

21 The Atheist stand up comic I was thinking of was George Carlin. I bet you he would have mocked tranny surprise.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 03:56 PM (Ut+C0)

22 20 Does the Angel of Death appear in the Northman?
Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 03:55 PM (8Sqzu)


There is a blind Seer.
Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 03:56 PM (fvaUx)

=======

And a Valkyrie.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 03:56 PM (LvTSG)

23 Dr. Kissinger is speaking at Davos.
He's saying we ought to dial down the whole poking the Russian bear thing.


They're not gonna want to hear that. All the Twitter lefties insist that even if Vlad nukes us it'll be super easy, barely an inconvenience.

Posted by: Ian S. at May 23, 2022 03:56 PM (ZGrMX)

24 I just find it interesting that Eggers keeps doing this, turning the "Fantasy Supernatural" dial up to its highest setting in a story that takes place in the real world.

***
As if John Ford had had the U.S. Cavalry up against not only Apaches, but the Apaches' gods too?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 03:57 PM (txdEq)

25 I guess Ethan Hunt has the "T" now, since Bond died and has left behind only woke soy-latte crap.

Posted by: Roy at May 23, 2022 03:57 PM (Pj9mr)

26 The Top Gun trailer I watched seemed to be full of strum, drang and high school turmoil, it seemed kind of empty.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at May 23, 2022 03:57 PM (3NKiY)

27 From the last thread.

Obligatory: Do you like boobs a lot?

https://youtu.be/D0qDW9shiD8

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at May 23, 2022 03:57 PM (jYQlA)

28 6 Biden belongs on Mt Rushmore. He is the greatest president
Posted by: Kaye in Maine at May 23, 2022 03:53 PM (F+uXE)

--------------------------

I agree. There's a significant chance he'd become disoriented and fall off.

Posted by: No One of Consequence at May 23, 2022 03:58 PM (CAJOC)

29 26 The Top Gun trailer I watched seemed to be full of strum, drang and high school turmoil, it seemed kind of empty.
Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at May 23, 2022 03:57 PM (3NKiY)

=======

Gotta get all the quadrants in. It's an expensive movie.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 03:58 PM (LvTSG)

30 Biden belongs on Mt Rushmore.

Maybe we could stick him on Washington's nose and just leave him there.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 03:58 PM (Ut+C0)

31 Cruise never forgot rule number 1.

People go to movies to be entertained.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 03:58 PM (3aLWR)

32 Tom Cruise is starting to look like a short wrinkled old fart.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at May 23, 2022 03:58 PM (VghRo)

33 20 Does the Angel of Death appear in the Northman?
Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 03:55 PM (8Sqzu)


There is a blind Seer.
---------------
Those are prophets. The Angel of Death slices the neck of those who volunteer to travel with a fallen king/lord to Valhalla. This shit is real. Vikings are very interesting. We know very little about them.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 03:58 PM (8Sqzu)

34
He's saying we ought to dial down the whole poking the Russian bear thing.
Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 23, 2022 03:54 PM (jTmQV)

___________

"Wars begin when you will, but do not end when you please." - Machiavelli

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 23, 2022 03:59 PM (/U27+)

35 But does The Northman have the kittens doing the Immigrant Song?

Posted by: Eromero at May 23, 2022 03:59 PM (0OP+5)

36 That trailer is dope af.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 03:50 PM (LvTSG)
********
Yeah, like any of that could really happen.

Posted by: redridinghood at May 23, 2022 03:59 PM (NpAcC)

37 Cruise looks like a hard-ass in the trailer, up until the little yellow car part. Comic relief, I assume.

Posted by: Roy at May 23, 2022 03:59 PM (Pj9mr)

38 30 Biden belongs on Mt Rushmore.

Maybe we could stick him on Washington's nose and just leave him there.
----------------
Hanging from the nose like a boogie would be appropriate.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 03:59 PM (8Sqzu)

39 Like cherished norms, TL;DR Movie Reviews are Back, Baby!

Posted by: Wally at May 23, 2022 03:59 PM (S8gsF)

40 Tom Cruise is a worldwide movie star more than a US one at this point.

The world is sick of wokeness/cancellation/censorship.

So, he's got 2 starring vehicles - Top Gun 2 and Mission Impossible 7 - which will reject these concepts.

And the world will probably love them. American BO TBD, but I'm pretty damn hopeful on Top Gun 2.

Posted by: Nova local at May 23, 2022 03:59 PM (exHjb)

41 Kissinger is still alive? Who knew.

Posted by: Infidel at May 23, 2022 04:00 PM (E0NVW)

42 And in unrelated News, Tom Cruise has been accused of multiple cases of sexual assault, going back decades.

Posted by: News from Tomorrow... at May 23, 2022 04:00 PM (oHd/0)

43 37 Cruise looks like a hard-ass in the trailer, up until the little yellow car part. Comic relief, I assume.
Posted by: Roy at May 23, 2022 03:59 PM (Pj9mr)

======

I think it's a reference to one of Bond's cars from For Your Eyes Only.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:00 PM (LvTSG)

44 32 Tom Cruise is starting to look like a short wrinkled old fart.
Posted by: Hairyback Guy at May 23, 2022 03:58 PM (VghRo)

It's the Harrison Ford effect.

Posted by: Roy at May 23, 2022 04:00 PM (Pj9mr)

45 meh. mission: impossible lost me when they made phelps a bad guy.

Posted by: Kulak Anachronda watched the tv series at May 23, 2022 04:00 PM (oY6Yp)

46 Ace movie preview! I might consider going to see it, if the reviews hold up.

Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:00 PM (SH2Zi)

47 From the last thread.

Obligatory: Do you like boobs a lot?

https://youtu.be/D0qDW9shiD8


I like the prominent "uploaded in HD" banner on that. Cause HD makes all the difference on that one.

Posted by: Blanco Basura - moronhorde.com. Not insurgents, counterrevolutionaries. at May 23, 2022 04:00 PM (vvLKM)

48 I'm now viscerally bothered by the whole antihero thing. It was good as an occasional departure but now it seems to be the rule.

Viewers want a rooting interest; I am not ashamed to relate that. It is natural and just.

The antihero obsession is just an extension of nihilism and if you are a true nihilist, what the hell are you doing taking the time to present a story to a bunch of idiots that don't matter? And why should I GAF to hear anything from you?

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:00 PM (hfvc1)

49 That plot twist?

Ethan Hunt's Attacker Is LGBT Zealot Who Was "Triggered" By His Actions?

I wanted to see the original one, but by making Jim Phelps the villain, I passed on it and every one since. This one will be included.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 23, 2022 04:00 PM (7bRMQ)

50 Biden belongs on Mt Rushmore.

only if someone will give him a push...

Posted by: goddessoftheclassroom at May 23, 2022 04:01 PM (REJkJ)

51 meh. mission: impossible lost me when they made phelps a bad guy.
Posted by: Kulak Anachronda watched the tv series at May 23, 2022 04:00 PM (oY6Yp)



You have a problem with plot twists?

Posted by: M. Night Shyamalandingdong at May 23, 2022 04:01 PM (fvaUx)

52 Cruise looks like a hard-ass in the trailer, up until the little yellow car part. Comic relief, I assume.

Posted by: Roy at May 23, 2022 03:59 PM (Pj9mr)

Couldn't use a new BMW because of the chip shortage so they settled for an Isetta

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at May 23, 2022 04:01 PM (OgrpQ)

53 And a Valkyrie.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 03:56 PM (LvTSG)

Chain Mail Bikini?

Posted by: Romeo13 at May 23, 2022 04:01 PM (oHd/0)

54 It's the Harrison Ford effect.
-----------------
Don't let Cruise start flying planes.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:01 PM (8Sqzu)

55 Go long on CGI futures.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at May 23, 2022 04:01 PM (Faksa)

56 I'm with you Ace - I saw the favorable reviews for The Northman and I wasn't that impressed with it. It's better than say Valhalla Rising, but I'm not going to watch The Northman.

"It's interesting but I don't know if I love it. And no, the magic can't just be in Amleth's head or something; he gets specific direction and prophecy from supernatural guides that are accurate and point him correctly to things he needs and places he must go."

Amleth also must do all these things because Fate (is that a big thing in Norse mythology like Greek mythology); he's also so important that he needs a special sword to fight his treacherous uncle *and* fuckin' ODIN shows up to save him at one point.

Posted by: Thrawn at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (Rl7KJ)

57 54 It's the Harrison Ford effect.
-----------------
Don't let Cruise start flying planes.
Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:01 PM (8Sqzu)

========

Who's gonna stop him? You?

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (LvTSG)

58 37 Cruise looks like a hard-ass in the trailer, up until the little yellow car part. Comic relief, I assume.

can't watch the trailer at work, so i'm just gonna assume it's the 2cv that roger moore drove around in that james bond film.

Posted by: Kulak Anachronda, behind the Newsom curtain at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (oY6Yp)

59 Happy Bonnie & Clyde Death Day!
May 23rd, 1934

Posted by: rickb223 TEXIT at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (Uh6Mj)

60 The Critical Drinker has a very positive review of Everything Everywhere All At Once on YouTube today. I wasn't going to bother but maybe I'll give it a shot.

Posted by: Mark1971 at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (xPl2J)

61 The Royal Shakespeare's Hamlet staring David Tennant os my current favorite movie version.

Posted by: 29Victor at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (BJKQV)

62 Coming out in July of 2023?

We might all be dead by then... from Biden's blunders or global warming.

Posted by: redridinghood at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (NpAcC)

63 I liked "The Witch," but kind of hated "The Lighthouse." Don't know if I'll bother with "The Northman."

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (p+1gI)

64 Chain Mail Bikini?
Posted by: Romeo13 at May 23, 2022 04:01 PM (oHd/0)



and, oddly, what look like braces on her teeth.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (fvaUx)

65 45 meh. mission: impossible lost me when they made phelps a bad guy.
Posted by: Kulak Anachronda watched the tv series at May 23, 2022 04:00 PM (oY6Yp)

The first three were just a gigantic rule of cool mess.

I think the first one I liked had the guy from Hawkeye. I really liked the first one with the hot redhead in the slinky green dress- even if she is a lib retard.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at May 23, 2022 04:03 PM (3NKiY)

66 The Top Gun trailer I watched seemed to be full of strum, drang and high school turmoil, it seemed kind of empty.

The reviews from actual people so far are that it's zero woke, which will be refreshing.

Posted by: Ian S. at May 23, 2022 04:03 PM (1TuZk)

67 Tom Cruise is starting to look like a short wrinkled old fart.

So playing to what he is?

At 0:50, the bad guy is doing the whispering thing. Biden does it better

Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:03 PM (ZsR3z)

68 And no, the magic can't just be in Amleth's head or something; he gets specific direction and prophecy from supernatural guides that are accurate and point him correctly to things he needs and places he must go."
----------------------
This is the story of Achilles. The Illiad all actors are directed by the gods. In the Odyssey, Odyssius uses his noodle to defeat the gods.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:03 PM (8Sqzu)

69 The Vikings with Kirk Douglas is still my favorite Vikings movie.

And I'm still searching for Charlton Heston's , The War Lord.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:03 PM (jNAzB)

70
Couldn't use a new BMW because of the chip shortage so they settled for an Isetta
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at May 23, 2022 04:01 PM (OgrpQ)

Beep, beep. Beep, beep. His horn went beep, beep, beep.

Posted by: Roy at May 23, 2022 04:03 PM (Pj9mr)

71 It's the Harrison Ford effect.


Don't let Cruise start flying planes.
Posted by: Puddin Head


Who's gonna stop him? You?
Posted by: TheJamesMadison


Gravity. Immovable objects. Etc.

Posted by: rickb223 TEXIT at May 23, 2022 04:03 PM (Uh6Mj)

72 I just find it interesting that Eggers keeps doing this, turning the "Fantasy Supernatural" dial up to its highest setting in a story that takes place in the real world.
++++
It makes it distinct, I suppose, if nothing else.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 23, 2022 04:04 PM (DU+/6)

73
Happy Bonnie & Clyde Death Day!
May 23rd, 1934
Posted by: rickb223 TEXIT at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (Uh6Mj)


I'm happy Hamer and the boys didn't spare any ammunition exterminating these psychopaths. It was just like 60s assholes to turn them into a doomed romantic couple.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 23, 2022 04:04 PM (/U27+)

74 I'd recommend the Lars Walker books on Erling Skjalgsson.

Like 3 or 5 of them now. All pretty good. A historical character but not much known about him so plenty of room for fictional filling.

Early Christianity and old gods.

Posted by: so you want a viking saga at May 23, 2022 04:04 PM (R8HSQ)

75 > I'm now viscerally bothered by the whole antihero thing. It was good as an occasional departure but now it seems to be the rule.

I blame Taxi Driver.

Posted by: bonhomme at May 23, 2022 04:04 PM (i0wNm)

76 "It's interesting but I don't know if I love it. And no, the magic can't just be in Amleth's head or something; he gets specific direction and prophecy from supernatural guides that are accurate and point him correctly to things he needs and places he must go."


This is like arguing that Hamlet is unrealistic because there is a ghost in it.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:04 PM (fvaUx)

77 Watching The Man Who Knew Too Little for the first time ever.
*giggling*

Posted by: vmom stabby stabby stabby stabby stabamillion at May 23, 2022 04:04 PM (kf6Ak)

78 Benji is the best thing about Mission Impossible.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:04 PM (jNAzB)

79 Thanks for the review(s)

I've only seen the first two Mission Impossible movies. And I own a lot more than that, but they just never made me reach for them.

I didn't see the Northman, though it is the song of my people, mostly because of reported gore. I'm not a gore hound.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (XvPQV)

80 The Northman pretty much sucks. For it to be advertised as this generation's Gladiator is false advertising. I was not entertained.

Posted by: Indignatio Vindacatorem at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (oWBc3)

81 And in unrelated News, Tom Cruise has been accused of multiple cases of sexual assault, going back decades.
Posted by: News from Tomorrow... at May 23, 2022


***
He's been accused of being gay (but he was married for almost a decade to smokeshow Nicole Kidman), of being a poor actor (but see Rain Man), of being kind of nutty when he jumped up and down on Oprah's couch (but who isn't kinda nutty in H'wood nowadays?), etc. I'm curious to see what these allegations are based on.

Disclaimer: I am not a big Tom Cruise fan. I was very glad that he turned down the role of Napoleon Solo in the Man From U.N.C.L.E. film. But he has proved himself as a performer over and over again for decades.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (txdEq)

82 Only recent movie I saw was the Spider Man one. It was a lot of fun, but I don't see how they can make another one after this. It kind of did all the things.

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (p+1gI)

83 I like the MI movies

Posted by: vmom stabby stabby stabby stabby stabamillion at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (kf6Ak)

84 And I'm still searching for Charlton Heston's , The War Lord.
-----------------
The chick that Heston is porking in that one was hawt.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (8Sqzu)

85 And...man, Simon Pegg is not aging well.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (XvPQV)

86 I watched the Mission Impossible that was supposed to be the kickass one, where everything got shut down or whatever. I mean, it was okay, in an ABC TV Movie of the Week way.

I think I just don't understand things anymore. Or I find paint by numbers scavenger hunt collect item X or speak to Y to continue drama with the occasional Bat-fight and Big Splodey splode to be very eh. It's probably just me.

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (yy25D)

87 65 I think the first one I liked had the guy from Hawkeye. I really liked the first one with the hot redhead in the slinky green dress- even if she is a lib retard.
Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at May 23, 2022 04:03 PM (3NKiY)

======

The first two were director driven vehicles. The first one is more of a Brian De Palma movie than a MI one, and the second is more of a John Woo movie than a MI one. With the third, Cruise brought on television man JJ Abrams, and it's as much an Abrams joint as a Cruise production, but it marks the definite move towards the familiar feel of the later ones.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (LvTSG)

88 Too bad that when this comes out in 2023, it'll cost $150 to see it at the show - if you skip the popcorn and drink.

Posted by: Roy at May 23, 2022 04:06 PM (Pj9mr)

89 rickb a BAR is a good crime stopper

Posted by: Skip at May 23, 2022 04:06 PM (2JoB8)

90 77 Watching The Man Who Knew Too Little for the first time ever.
*giggling*
Posted by: vmom stabby stabby stabby stabby stabamillion at May 23, 2022 04:04 PM (kf6Ak)

"No one said anything about American Superman."

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:06 PM (XvPQV)

91 85 And...man, Simon Pegg is not aging well.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (XvPQV)

==========

He stopped drinking. That's his problem.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:07 PM (LvTSG)

92 Regarding "Mission Impossible"? Big naah; no; nope.

Hollywood killed the franchise for me when the first movie made Jim Phelps a bad guy. If they can't respect the canon, they get NOTHING from me.

Posted by: Doo-Dah, Doo-Dah at May 23, 2022 04:07 PM (l2+Yb)

93 And I'm still searching for Charlton Heston's , The War Lord.
Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:03 PM (jNAzB)


Are you boycotting Amazon?

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at May 23, 2022 04:07 PM (ZSK0i)

94 I'm looking forward to watching Mission Impossible, I like the others.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 04:07 PM (DcKNO)

95 the brutal reality of life in 895 A.D., when a moose bit my sister.

Things you learn on this blog:

1) There are moose on Endor.
2) Ewoks are long-lived.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at May 23, 2022 04:07 PM (a3Q+t)

96 rickb a BAR is a good crime stopper
Posted by: Skip


Yes it is!

Posted by: rickb223 TEXIT at May 23, 2022 04:07 PM (Uh6Mj)

97 I don't give a shit if we "poke the Russian Bear" or not. What i can't abide is these five-star groin idiots waving their noodle arms about the Russian Bear's snout yelling "I'M NOT TOUCHING YOU I'M NOT TOUCHING YOU".

Posted by: Warai-otoko at May 23, 2022 04:07 PM (vsOlR)

98 And...man, Simon Pegg is not aging well.

And Rebecca Ferguson's nose isn't getting any smaller. Her elbows are still topnotch, though.

Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:08 PM (ZsR3z)

99 Now the Man from UNCLE movie...that shit was money. I really, really wished Guy Ritchie would have made more movies like that. And less like the gay baiting The Gentlemen

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:08 PM (XvPQV)

100 Happy Bonnie & Clyde Death Day!
May 23rd, 1934
Posted by: rickb223
--------

Justice served. Those were the days.

Posted by: Melvin Purvis at May 23, 2022 04:08 PM (Go9h8)

101 As if John Ford had had the U.S. Cavalry up against not only Apaches, but the Apaches' gods too?

----‐--

I'd watch the fuck out of that movie.

Posted by: Colorado Alex in Exile at May 23, 2022 04:08 PM (C5Hln)

102 I can't watch grace Randolph. Something about her annoys me.

Posted by: Colorado Alex in Exile at May 23, 2022 04:08 PM (C5Hln)

103 I'm not aging well either. It happens to everyone.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:08 PM (3aLWR)

104 > I'm happy Hamer and the boys didn't spare any ammunition exterminating these psychopaths. It was just like 60s assholes to turn them into a doomed romantic couple.

1930s assholes romanticized the hell out of Bonnie and Clyde first.

Posted by: bonhomme at May 23, 2022 04:09 PM (i0wNm)

105 I always watch them on TV, never seen one in a theater

Posted by: Skip at May 23, 2022 04:09 PM (2JoB8)

106 And...man, Simon Pegg is not aging well.

And Rebecca Ferguson's nose isn't getting any smaller. Her elbows are still topnotch, though.
Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:08 PM (ZsR3z)

Yep, good body, give her quality hair and makeup job and she's money too.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:09 PM (XvPQV)

107 I'm now viscerally bothered by the whole antihero thing. It was good as an occasional departure but now it seems to be the rule.

I blame Taxi Driver.
Posted by: bonhomme at May 23, 2022


***
Antiheroes had been around in popular fiction for a while before that. See Donald E. Westlake's stories (as by "Richard Stark") about Parker the tough professional thief, starting in 1962. But they were rare in films until the '70s -- partly because the remnants of the Hays Office censorship would not let criminals profit by their crime, so a criminal antihero would always be seen to fail. Once that restriction was lifted, bingo.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:09 PM (txdEq)

108 ace has a low bar for sumptin

Posted by: REDACTED at May 23, 2022 04:09 PM (us2H3)

109 78 Benji is the best thing about Mission Impossible.

meh. give the gem-stealing cat from the tv series.

Posted by: anachronda at May 23, 2022 04:09 PM (oY6Yp)

110 BULL an Indie movie that I thought was really good and a better Revenge movie, The guy out for revenge is not a good guy, but the only good he has done is His son, and his Drug addicted wife wants the son and BULL gone.

Posted by: Patrick From Ohio at May 23, 2022 04:09 PM (dKiJG)

111 80 The Northman pretty much sucks. For it to be advertised as this generation's Gladiator is false advertising. I was not entertained.
-----------------
I'm reading Fergusson's The Vikings. My first takeaway is that the History Channel's Vikings used this book as the basis for their script. Pretty much every historical mention in the book is found somewhere in the series. Fergusson's book was an attempt to lay out what we do know about them to illustrate how little we really know about them. Its interesting.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:09 PM (8Sqzu)

112 Only recent movie I saw was the Spider Man one. It was a lot of fun, but I don't see how they can make another one after this. It kind of did all the things.
Posted by: BeckoningChasm at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (p+1gI)


Not sure how you come back once you start down the goofy road of the Multiverse. Unless you say, "Of the infinite number of universes out there, it turns out we're in the only one without other universes out there. Now, let's start over."

Posted by: Wally at May 23, 2022 04:09 PM (S8gsF)

113 I think I just don't understand things anymore. Or I find paint by numbers scavenger hunt collect item X or speak to Y to continue drama with the occasional Bat-fight and Big Splodey splode to be very eh. It's probably just me.

No, it isn't. Even the trailer is completely formulaic. Car with no doors? Check. Driving motorcycle off a cliff? Check. Endless car chases? Done!

Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:09 PM (ZsR3z)

114 Happy Bonnie & Clyde Death Day!
May 23rd, 1934
Posted by: rickb223
--------

Justice served. Those were the days.
Posted by: Melvin Purvis at May 23, 2022 04:08 PM (Go9h

The Highway Men was surprisingly good.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:10 PM (XvPQV)

115 I haven't watched a "new" movie in years. We stream all our video now and if it's not on one of the platforms we have it doesn't get watched.

At this point I'll never visit a theater either. I can't imagine spending the amount of money it takes these days to sit in a dirty theater, with annoying people and overpriced snacks to watch a movie with the sound turned up to 11.

And no pause button when I go pee.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at May 23, 2022 04:10 PM (BFigT)

116 19 "Viking" doesn't describe a people or a geographic region.
It's an occupation.
Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 23, 2022 03:56 PM (jTmQV)

It's not just a job. It's an adventure.

Posted by: 29Victor at May 23, 2022 04:10 PM (BJKQV)

117 103 I'm not aging well either. It happens to everyone.
Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:08 PM (3aLWR)

----

Shit, I got a look at myself in a video made with the grandchild and I look like hell.

And I work at not looking like hell.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 04:10 PM (DcKNO)

118 98 And...man, Simon Pegg is not aging well.

And Rebecca Ferguson's nose isn't getting any smaller. Her elbows are still topnotch, though.


and leon's getting larger

Posted by: johnny at May 23, 2022 04:10 PM (oY6Yp)

119 Tom Cruise is starting to look like a short wrinkled old fart.
______________

Yep, apparently that deal he made with the devil has expired, or something.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at May 23, 2022 04:10 PM (MvHI3)

120 Tom Cruise still looks good for his age. He turns 60 on July 3rd.

Posted by: redridinghood at May 23, 2022 04:10 PM (NpAcC)

121 112 Only recent movie I saw was the Spider Man one. It was a lot of fun, but I don't see how they can make another one after this. It kind of did all the things.
Posted by: BeckoningChasm at May 23, 2022 04:05 PM (p+1gI)


Not sure how you come back once you start down the goofy road of the Multiverse. Unless you say, "Of the infinite number of universes out there, it turns out we're in the only one without other universes out there. Now, let's start over."
Posted by: Wally at May 23, 2022 04:09 PM (S8gsF)

Multiverses are now gone again - next Spidey movie will probably be his college days. It could be Kraven as the villain or they could have Ned (who now no longer knows Spidey) start his descent into HobGoblin...or both...

Posted by: Nova local at May 23, 2022 04:10 PM (exHjb)

122 Valhalla Rising is a weird Vikings movie. And I am still convinced who ever directed Mandy borrowed the cinematography and pacing from VR.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:11 PM (jNAzB)

123 "1930s assholes romanticized the hell out of Bonnie and Clyde..."

Because banks were truly hated then.
I mean, we hate banks now, but in the 1930s it was actually patriotic to hate banks.

Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 23, 2022 04:11 PM (jTmQV)

124 As if John Ford had had the U.S. Cavalry up against not only Apaches, but the Apaches' gods too?

----‐--
I'd watch the fuck out of that movie.
Posted by: Colorado Alex in Exile at May 23, 2022


***
So would I. Picture John Wayne, Henry Fonda, John Agar, and Victor McLaglen standing in the desert night, awestruck by the inhuman but glorious power that is . . . The Thunderbird!

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:11 PM (txdEq)

125 Weren't the Apache gods like Loki? Tricksters more than almighties?

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:11 PM (fvaUx)

126 This kinda makes me want to watch the Northman. Makes sense to me that in a Norse blood feud it wouldnt matter if the target was a king, or not. What matters is that you want bloody vengence against that guy.

Same thing with the other stuff. Funny that we'd want / expect a "hero" to never get his hands dirty -- the "hero" must object to the victory celebration process.

Not sure that would be the case to the people passing the norse legend down though. To them, it wouldnt make him an anti-hero. Nor would using good tactics to take down an adversary (killing a drunkard).

We're really steeped in western tropes when it comes to this stuff, and it doesn't sound like this story is, which is interesting.

Posted by: Revenant at May 23, 2022 04:11 PM (rLV5H)

127 and leon's getting larger

That guy was brilliant. Also gay, and died of AIDS.

Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:11 PM (ZsR3z)

128 I loved Bull!!!

Posted by: Billy Kristol at May 23, 2022 04:11 PM (zmuWw)

129 Scandahoovians are one of the few races left that can be pained as being bad guys.

Posted by: 29Victor at May 23, 2022 04:12 PM (BJKQV)

130 You know who aged really well? James Dean.

I'm pretty cool with *not* aging well.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at May 23, 2022 04:12 PM (6FeV1)

131 He stopped drinking. That's his problem.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:07 PM (LvTSG)

Looking at him, I would have guessed the opposite. I mean...I guess he's not trying to look young and fit forever. So...good on him???

Ah well, he's been in some damn funny movies.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:12 PM (XvPQV)

132 Lot of people don't realize the Normans were transplanted Vikings.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:12 PM (jNAzB)

133 Tom Cruise is starting to look like a short wrinkled old fart.
______________

Yep, apparently that deal he made with the devil has expired, or something.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at May 23, 2022


***
Those deals were usually for 7 years only. Maybe Satan gave some of the marks a little better offer now and then.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:12 PM (txdEq)

134 the brutal reality of life in 895 A.D., when a moose bit my sister.

Things you learn on this blog:

1) There are moose on Endor.
2) Ewoks are long-lived.
Posted by: Duncanthrax


Meese have bitten sisters since the dawn of time.

Goose - Geese, Moose - Meese. Deal with it.

Posted by: rickb223 TEXIT at May 23, 2022 04:12 PM (Uh6Mj)

135 and, oddly, what look like braces on her teeth.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (fvaUx)

Wardrobe malfunction. It happened when we were...uh, practicing our lines. Yeah, that's it.

Posted by: Other Valkyrie, The Lesbian One at May 23, 2022 04:12 PM (7bRMQ)

136 122 Valhalla Rising is a weird Vikings movie. And I am still convinced who ever directed Mandy borrowed the cinematography and pacing from VR.
Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:11 PM (jNAzB)

========

I like Nicholas Winding Refn. He's all style and very, very little substance, but I do like his style. The Neon Demon is just high class pulpy trash.

I do not really like Panos Cosmatos, though. Neither Mandy nor Beyond the Black Rainbow had enough style to overcome their languid pacing, and there was pretty much no substance to it either. I was bored by both.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:12 PM (LvTSG)

137 The Highway Men was surprisingly good.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:10 PM (XvPQV)

Costner plays cardboard stoic pretty well. And honestly, Harrelson is a pretty damned good actor.

He killed it in Rampart

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:13 PM (3aLWR)

138 There was some promo with that old midget at the Daily Mail last week. He kept holding his stomach with his left hand.

I figure those shoes gave him about a 2" lift.

Posted by: Braenyard at May 23, 2022 04:13 PM (pBly4)

139 Lot of people don't realize the Normans were transplanted Vikings.

Vikings who spoke with outRAYgeous French accents!

Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:13 PM (ZsR3z)

140
It'll be interesting to watch all the intentional "rolling brown-outs" in California, this Summer. I wonder if the "brown-outs" will happen in other states. I suspect so.

I wonder if People will finally have Enough of being part of the left's social engineering.

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:13 PM (SfHsb)

141 John Wayne movies all weekend on INSP and Grit. Yes, I'm an old foof.

Posted by: Infidel at May 23, 2022 04:13 PM (E0NVW)

142 Weren't the Apache gods like Loki? Tricksters more than almighties?
Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022


***
The Navaho had Coyote, who was certainly a trickster type. Not sure about the Chiricahuas and other Apaches.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:13 PM (txdEq)

143 131 Looking at him, I would have guessed the opposite. I mean...I guess he's not trying to look young and fit forever. So...good on him???

Ah well, he's been in some damn funny movies.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:12 PM (XvPQV)

========

Maybe he's gone back, but I remember him doing press for The World's End where he made a point of saying that he'd left all of that kind of living behind.

Maybe he just doesn't work out and likes to eat.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:13 PM (LvTSG)

144 The Highway Men was a better movie than Bonnie and Clyde, imho.

Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 23, 2022 04:14 PM (jTmQV)

145
Do all MI trailers feature Tom Cruise sprinting?

Posted by: ArthurK at May 23, 2022 04:14 PM (sHuIA)

146 No Top Gun because KowTow to china.

Posted by: AshevilleRobert at May 23, 2022 04:14 PM (fv27Y)

147 Costner plays cardboard stoic pretty well. And honestly, Harrelson is a pretty damned good actor.

He killed it in Rampart
Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:13 PM (3aLWR)

I dislike Harrelson but...yeah, the guy matured into a good actor. He's also really good in the first season of 'True Detective'.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:14 PM (XvPQV)

148 145
Do all MI trailers feature Tom Cruise sprinting?
Posted by: ArthurK at May 23, 2022 04:14 PM (sHuIA)

========

It's a meme by this point. He sprints in pretty much everything, but especially in the MI movies.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:14 PM (LvTSG)

149 The anti-hero only works when he has clean cut actual heros to play against.

Posted by: Colorado Alex in Exile at May 23, 2022 04:14 PM (C5Hln)

150 If you have the space and funds and love movies, I highly recommend a home theater. Took me ten years to finally do mine and it was worth every penny and minute of wait.

With the right equipment (shut up) including a projector, you can get an experience that is shockingly close to a big cinema. Like 90% there. It's magnificent. And these days it's practically a no brainer.

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:15 PM (9PWW0)

151 75 > I'm now viscerally bothered by the whole antihero thing. It was good as an occasional departure but now it seems to be the rule.

I blame Taxi Driver.
Posted by: bonhomme at May 23, 2022 04:04 PM (i0wNm)
Tell me shaitan ain't been a scriptwriter from the beginning.

Posted by: Eromero at May 23, 2022 04:15 PM (0OP+5)

152 I got snookered on "The Lost City".

Thought I'd do something nice for Mrs. WisRich. She likes Sandra Bullock, likes Rom-Com's, and it had good scores at Rotten Tomatoes. So I stream for $19.99

Absolutely terrible.

I mean, just wow, really bad.

Posted by: WisRich at May 23, 2022 04:15 PM (G0vdT)

153 Braces

https://bityl.co/CKxj

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:15 PM (fvaUx)

154 "It'll be interesting to watch all the intentional "rolling brown-outs" in California, this Summer. I wonder if the "brown-outs" will happen in other states. I suspect so.

I wonder if People will finally have Enough of being part of the left's social engineering.

Posted by: Soothsayer"

How long before the term "Brown-out" gets cancelled?

Posted by: AshevilleRobert at May 23, 2022 04:15 PM (fv27Y)

155 I learned a new phrase yesterday. When you're doing something ineffectively, you're faffing about. Apparently it's not actually vulgar.

Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:15 PM (ZsR3z)

156 We're really steeped in western tropes when it comes to this stuff, and it doesn't sound like this story is, which is interesting.

it definitely gets the mood of "this is a completely different culture with different values" right

Posted by: brak at May 23, 2022 04:15 PM (j5Tg0)

157 and explanation, maybe

https://bityl.co/CKxp

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:15 PM (fvaUx)

158 150 If you have the space and funds and love movies, I highly recommend a home theater. Took me ten years to finally do mine and it was worth every penny and minute of wait.

With the right equipment (shut up) including a projector, you can get an experience that is shockingly close to a big cinema. Like 90% there. It's magnificent. And these days it's practically a no brainer.
Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:15 PM (9PWW0


Hmmm. I could renovate the East wing.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:16 PM (3aLWR)

159 Part of the reason they made two parts is because Cruise and the director decided that the movie, even though they finished shooting it, wasn't actually finished, since that allowed then to have total control. Also it let them add a submarine to it.

They're was a good article about it in the Hollywood reporter an issue or two ago about how Cruise is one of the last giant stars to get almost full control (plus first dollar earnings)

Posted by: Rbastid at May 23, 2022 04:16 PM (eh4B6)

160 New Top Gun has Applebee's as a primary sponsor. Now that's irony.

Posted by: Indignatio Vindacatorem at May 23, 2022 04:16 PM (oWBc3)

161 Biden belongs on Mt Rushmore. He is the greatest president
Posted by: Kaye in Maine at May 23, 2022 03:53 PM (F+uXE)

Drop him on top via helicopter and see if he can get down or if he's a post turtle.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at May 23, 2022 04:16 PM (MFphb)

162 John Wayne movies all weekend on INSP and Grit. Yes, I'm an old foof.
Posted by: Infidel at May 23, 2022 04:13 PM (E0NVW

They had Humph day yesterday on the Movie Channel. Kind of amazing Bogart was super cool leading man. Not the physical specimen one would think.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:17 PM (jNAzB)

163 6 Biden belongs on Mt Rushmore. He is the greatest president
Posted by: Kaye in Maine at May 23, 2022 03:53 PM (F+uXE)
Kaye in Maine ably goes against the grain.

Posted by: Chuck Martel at May 23, 2022 04:17 PM (fs1hN)

164 145
Do all MI trailers feature Tom Cruise sprinting?
Posted by: ArthurK at May 23, 2022 04:14 PM (sHuIA)

Can't stomach the little cray-cray fag. He runs like a dolt. Because he is, get this, a dolt. He is a small man trying to act so tough he ends up looking like a bantam rooster strutting. I really can't take him seriously in anything.

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at May 23, 2022 04:17 PM (okGHj)

165 Now the Man from UNCLE movie...that shit was money. I really, really wished Guy Ritchie would have made more movies like that. And less like the gay baiting The Gentlemen
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022


***
As an MFU fan all the way back to age 11, I was horribly worried that modern H'wood would gag it up and ruin the property, as they have Dark Shadows and 21 Jump Street. But Ritchie knows how to tell a story, and how to keep the flavor of the original while modeling the film his own way. See the Sherlock Holmes films with Robert Downey. His SH is quite different in some ways from Doyle's original; but there are various touches in there that do honor to the original. Same with MFU.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:18 PM (txdEq)

166 On Her Majesty's Secret Service best Bond movie ever.
We lost Diana Rigg last year. Fuck cancer.

And
FJB

Posted by: torabora at May 23, 2022 04:18 PM (Y274z)

167 Son and Spouse have been watching John Ford's "The Searchers" in the evening, but they may take a break tonight as I requested "Mr. Hobbs take a vacation" with Jimmy Stewart and Maureen O'Hara.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 04:18 PM (Ut+C0)

168 Tom Cruise is my favorite Scientologist. Can’t wait for Top Gun2 and Mission.

Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:19 PM (W6qhI)

169 I really can't take him seriously in anything.
==
If you only knew the history of psychiatry like I know the history of psychiatry!!!!

Posted by: he cannot be taken seriously at May 23, 2022 04:19 PM (Nj327)

170 At least the MI movies use human beings and technology and don't rely on supernatural beings like Loki or Thor or whatever to save the day.
That takes all the power from a human story. There's no human struggle to overcome in a superhero movie or one that is guided by supernatural powers.*

*Not God of course. There are gods aplenty and lots of supernatural beings but no God.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at May 23, 2022 04:19 PM (MFphb)

171 169 I really can't take him seriously in anything.
==
If you only knew the history of psychiatry like I know the history of psychiatry!!!!
Posted by: he cannot be taken seriously at May 23, 2022 04:19 PM (Nj327)

=========

"We're doing a great job."
-Psychiatry, 2022

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:19 PM (LvTSG)

172 I don't give a shit if we "poke the Russian Bear" or not. What i can't abide is these five-star groin idiots waving their noodle arms about the Russian Bear's snout yelling "I'M NOT TOUCHING YOU I'M NOT TOUCHING YOU".

It's perfectly in character for General Milley though.

Posted by: Ian S. at May 23, 2022 04:19 PM (ZGrMX)

173 John Wayne movies all weekend on INSP and Grit. Yes, I'm an old foof.
Posted by: Infidel at May 23, 2022 04:13 PM (E0NVW

They had Humph day yesterday on the Movie Channel. Kind of amazing Bogart was super cool leading man. Not the physical specimen one would think.
Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022


***
Did Bogart ever do a "U.S. Cavalry in the 1880s Southwest" kind of army picture? I think he did at least one Western, and of course he played the tank sergeant in Sahara, but I dunno if he ever did a cavalry vs. the Indians flick.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:20 PM (txdEq)

174 >>>Hollywood killed the franchise for me when the first movie made Jim Phelps a bad guy. If they can't respect the canon, they get NOTHING from me.


i totally understand that but the movies have gotten good.

here's some head cannon to help you work through this: "Jim Phelps" is just a workname assigned to people in the IMF. the "Jim Phelps" of M:I 1996 is not the Jim Phelps of the 60s/70s series. I don't know if the ages would work anyway.

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:20 PM (AkbRF)

175 Apparently Arby's has decided to go burger.

At least for a bit.

Not just any cow but fancy Japanese cow.

Waygu burger at Arby's.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:20 PM (3aLWR)

176 If you have the space and funds and love movies, I highly recommend a home theater. Took me ten years to finally do mine and it was worth every penny and minute of wait.

With the right equipment (shut up) including a projector, you can get an experience that is shockingly close to a big cinema. Like 90% there. It's magnificent. And these days it's practically a no brainer.

I have 7.1 Surround Sound and a good Projector, Now you just need to buy a Popcorn machine and you a golden.

Posted by: Patrick From Ohio at May 23, 2022 04:20 PM (dKiJG)

177 I'm not a Cruise fan but he made back to back movies I really liked. Oblivion and Edge of Tomorrow.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:20 PM (jNAzB)

178 Since this is a movie thread, I watched He Never Died (2015) this week. It was a quirky mashup of The Man from Earth and John Wick.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (fvaUx)

179 174 here's some head cannon to help you work through this: "Jim Phelps" is just a workname assigned to people in the IMF. the "Jim Phelps" of M:I 1996 is not the Jim Phelps of the 60s/70s series. I don't know if the ages would work anyway.
Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:20 PM (AkbRF)

=========

Peter Graves was asked to be Phelps in that movie, and he turned it down because of the twist.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (LvTSG)

180 Maybe it's just me, but I have found that I lose any interest in movies the older I get.

The wokeness hasn't helped matters any.

Posted by: SMH at what's coming at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (1+5Xl)

181 So would I. Picture John Wayne, Henry Fonda, John Agar, and Victor McLaglen standing in the desert night, awestruck by the inhuman but glorious power that is . . . The Thunderbird!

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:11 PM (txdEq)

I experienced Thunderbird all the time. And Boone's Farm and Annie Green Springs and Spanada and Ripple and....

Posted by: Big Vic at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (7bRMQ)

182 Drop him on top via helicopter and see if he can get down or if he's a post turtle.
Posted by: OneEyedJack at May 23, 2022 04:16 PM (MFphb)

Read that as "on top *of* a helicopter".....

(PTHBTHTBHTHTBTH)

Posted by: Warai-otoko at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (6FeV1)

183 Hmmm. I could renovate the East wing.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:16 PM (3aLWR)

I squeezed mine into a relatively small home office. It's a 2.35:1 screen and at 120 inches diagonal, it stretches the width of the room. With clever use of space it can absolutely be done. I can't get very many people in there but I don't care because fuck other people.

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (BxciZ)

184 Here he is holding his stomach, again, along side some horse faced crow.

https://is.gd/d8NGAZ

Posted by: Braenyard at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (pBly4)

185 Who was the smoking hot Asian IMF agent a movie or two ago?

Maggie Q maybe?

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (3aLWR)

186 26 The Top Gun trailer I watched seemed to be full of strum, drang and high school turmoil, it seemed kind of empty.
Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at May 23, 2022 03:57 PM (3NKiY)

It's the Navy. What did you expect? 😁

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at May 23, 2022 04:22 PM (Qhnrt)

187 185 Who was the smoking hot Asian IMF agent a movie or two ago?

Maggie Q maybe?
Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (3aLWR)

======

Movie 3, yeah.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:22 PM (LvTSG)

188 Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:20 PM (txdEq)

I think he did a couple in the 30's before he hit it big.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:22 PM (jNAzB)

189 Brown out is racist!
How would you like it if they called it white out.
Power outage is triggering of white privilege.

Posted by: torabora at May 23, 2022 04:22 PM (Y274z)

190 116 19 "Viking" doesn't describe a people or a geographic region.
It's an occupation.
Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 23, 2022 03:56 PM (jTmQV)

It's not just a job. It's an adventure.
----------------
Basically pirates who eat pickled fish and carry really big swords and axes.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:23 PM (8Sqzu)

191 The first MI was the only one I liked. The rest have always seemed very cookie-cutterish to me.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 23, 2022 04:23 PM (ppBhU)

192 185 Who was the smoking hot Asian IMF agent a movie or two ago?
---------------
Fang Fang or Fuk Mi?

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:24 PM (8Sqzu)

193 >>>
Peter Graves was asked to be Phelps in that movie, and he turned it down because of the twist.

i don't blame him, it's b***shit. And why would you reboot a franchise only to burn down the valuable parts of it? Phelps could have continued on as "The guy on the tape."

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:24 PM (AkbRF)

194 Amleth is not an active participant in that stuff, but he also doesn't object. And it's no surprise to him -- he's been doing this a while, he knows what the post-victory procedures are.

Sounds like a leftist fantasy of being the bad ass who gets rid of all the hoarders and wreckers and kulaks but is still the good guy.

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at May 23, 2022 04:24 PM (llON8)

195 I also watched The Outfit (2022) this week. It starts well, then gets dumb, and ends dumber.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:24 PM (fvaUx)

196 193 i don't blame him, it's b***shit. And why would you reboot a franchise only to burn down the valuable parts of it? Phelps could have continued on as "The guy on the tape."

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:24 PM (AkbRF)

=========

Brian De Palma: subverting your expectations before Rian Johnson.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:25 PM (LvTSG)

197 174 here's some head cannon to help you work through this: "Jim Phelps" is just a workname assigned to people in the IMF. the "Jim Phelps" of M:I 1996 is not the Jim Phelps of the 60s/70s series.

that's nice.

Posted by: anachronda at May 23, 2022 04:25 PM (oY6Yp)

198 I didn't hate the other MI movies. I was entertained. At some point I'll see this one.

I do want to see the new Dune flick but I'll wait till the second one comes out and watch both. Probably online or I'll just buy the DVDs.

Posted by: Puddleglum at May 23, 2022 04:25 PM (sAmhv)

199 #186
All I tried to do was bring some life into their otherwise haze gray days and nights.

Posted by: Fat Leonard at May 23, 2022 04:25 PM (Y274z)

200 >>>Brian De Palma: subverting your expectations before Rian Johnson.

tom cruise had all the power there. supposedly he was a fan of the show. apparently not so much. he just wanted to burn the old show so he wouldn't have any competition from the past.

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:25 PM (AkbRF)

201 193 i don't blame him, it's b***shit. And why would you reboot a franchise only to burn down the valuable parts of it?

can't imagine

Posted by: disney at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (oY6Yp)

202 Braces

https://bityl.co/CKxj

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:15 PM (fvaUx)

Really bad Gingivitis? Oh, NGU....

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (7bRMQ)

203 Here he is holding his stomach, again, along side some horse faced crow.

https://is.gd/d8NGAZ

Posted by: Braenyard at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (pBly4)

Holy Crow, Jennifer Connelly took a nose dive out of the ugly tree and aimed for every branch on the way down. Sad.

Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (SH2Zi)

204 here's some head cannon to help you work through this: "Jim Phelps" is just a workname assigned to people in the IMF. the "Jim Phelps" of M:I 1996 is not the Jim Phelps of the 60s/70s series. I don't know if the ages would work anyway.
Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:20 PM (AkbRF)


Not sure, there is the episode where the bad guys were torturing Cinnamon to give up Phelp's name and she would not do it. Came close but she didn't do it. Or maybe I'm reading way too much into the Mission Impossible canon.

Posted by: moon_over_vermont at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (NxOLn)

205 It's funny and sad both, that a TV series (MI) that was possibly the greatest example of how to make an intellectual puzzle exciting -- spy stories for smart TV watchers -- has turned into something so much more action-oriented. It's as if Shaw's Pygmalion had been morphed into something where Prof. Higgins, played by the young Bruce Willis, performs dazzling stunts in each new play as he fights against those who want to ruin the English language.

Dan Briggs, were he still around, would weep.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (txdEq)

206 I keep hoping this tranny phase turns out like Scientology phase - Really popular among the trendy set, and then they quietly (without admitting they were wrong) all kind of abandon it right as all the tell-alls and documentaries start coming out.

Posted by: Wally at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (S8gsF)

207 >>> 168 Tom Cruise is my favorite Scientologist. Can’t wait for Top Gun2 and Mission.
Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:19 PM (W6qhI)

Hey! I may be fat, but he's a dumbass. A stumpy little dumbass.

Posted by: Kirstie Alley at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (llON8)

208 Basically pirates who eat pickled fish and plunder fartclams (but like a viking).

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenko Solutions at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (Iz2Z7)

209 anyway I really hate that stupid twist but the Mission impossible movies have been really good since M:I 3. M:I 5 was great, 6 was almost as good.

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (AkbRF)

210 I turned one of my bedrooms into a media room, I had a closet on one wall with folding doors . I wired up the inside of the closet with power outlets and put a 70 inch TV in it. Can close the doors when not in use. Put in one row of recliners . Decorated the rest of the room with movie posters, popcorn machine and other movie memorabilia.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:27 PM (jNAzB)

211 I give credit where credit is due. The MI movies post-John Woo's shit-fest (MI 2) have been good to very, very good. Ethan Hunt is what James Bond used to be: the happy warrior.

Posted by: Pete at May 23, 2022 04:27 PM (6Cxeh)

212 Yeah, "The Northman" is good, not great.

I guess my biggest problem is that Eggers wants to turn the final duel/climax into an internal duel for Amleth's soul or some such thing.

The way it's shot makes the Uncle and Amleth look almost undistiquishable. Eggers clearly wants us to think that they're now the same. Both on "the same" vengeance quest, except for one thing -

Amleth is now fighting for love and family, not brutish revenge. He takes possession of his own quest and through that love saves himself.

I guess.

Anyway, if you're going to go full bull looney of Vikingism, do it.

Don't dilute things with a soy-based soft ending and modern equivalence crapola.

Posted by: naturalfake at May 23, 2022 04:27 PM (OK0YZ)

213 I always liked the theory that James Bond was a codename like 007 or M or Q, but Skyfall kind of ended that.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:27 PM (LvTSG)

214 117 103 I'm not aging well either. It happens to everyone.
Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:08 PM (3aLWR)

----

Shit, I got a look at myself in a video made with the grandchild and I look like hell.

And I work at not looking like hell.
Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 04:10 PM (DcKNO);
Well yeah, compared to a child.

Posted by: Eromero at May 23, 2022 04:27 PM (0OP+5)

215 Pretty much all I watch is Oak Island and an occasional Ancient Aliens. The older Ancient Aliens are the best. The new one are kind of creepy cuz all the hosts are so old.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:27 PM (8Sqzu)

216 Thought in clip they did a good job making Tom look younger than his 4 foot 6 inch is

Posted by: Skip at May 23, 2022 04:27 PM (2JoB8)

217 The Critical Drinker has a very positive review of Everything Everywhere All At Once on YouTube today. I wasn't going to bother but maybe I'll give it a shot.
Posted by: Mark1971 at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (xPl2J)


You'll regret that decision. It's not good.

Posted by: naturalfake at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (OK0YZ)

218 Not a whole lot of dialog in that trailer, was there.

I reached the "needs better dialog" phase of my life too many years ago.

Posted by: WisRich at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (G0vdT)

219 Cruise needs to find some scripts that feature a grizzled old sage who saves the day with his keen intellect, and amuses the babes with his dazzling wit. The young male lead can be a well-meaning but not too bright guy whose brawn and bravado are just no match for the old-timer's experience and intelligence.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (MvHI3)

220 Which MI had the very very stupid runaway chunnel train scene?

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (jNAzB)

221 Here's the Trailer for BULL I can't recommend this movie enough
https://tinyurl.com/2kdvswvy

Posted by: Patrick From Ohio at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (dKiJG)

222 Holy Crow, Jennifer Connelly took a nose dive out of the ugly tree and aimed for every branch on the way down. Sad.
Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (SH2Zi


Dayum, you've got some standards.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (3aLWR)

223 215 Pretty much all I watch is Oak Island and an occasional Ancient Aliens.

i watch skinwalker ranch, mostly because it's five miles from my high school.

Posted by: anachronda at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (oY6Yp)

224 Since we're talking Tom Cruise looking Old, I watched Old on HBO Max.

M Night tried, but it doesn't get there. It's like a B movie level Sixth Sense at the beach. That said, I didn't fall asleep and it is mostly enjoyable, so a B- grade and a "decent movie when you want a suspense film to figure out that's pretty easy and not greatly acted" is probably the one sentence review...

Posted by: Nova local at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (exHjb)

225 I didn't hate the other MI movies. I was entertained. At some point I'll see this one.

I do want to see the new Dune flick but I'll wait till the second one comes out and watch both. Probably online or I'll just buy the DVDs.

Posted by: Puddleglum at May 23, 2022 04:25 PM (sAmhv)

I enjoy them, but special effects ruined the first. Special effects, John Woo, and Dugray ruined the second. The others I have seen have not stood out in any way much too horrible to remember. So I guess that's good.

Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (SH2Zi)

226 >>>I just find it interesting that Eggers keeps doing this, turning the "Fantasy Supernatural" dial up to its highest setting in a story that takes place in the real world.

I find the idea distracting. It creates a paradox. If magic is rare, difficult and costly then the world would look more or less like a magic less world because changing physical/natural outcomes using magic would be exceedingly uncommon.

But if magic is powerful, and common, then you would expect people to use it more often to change physical/natural outcomes and that starts to have an affect on the world at large to where it is less realistic. Magic manipulation becomes it's own "technology" and has the effect technology has on a society. Medium and high magic doesn't logically jive with a gritty realistic primitive ancient world.

Posted by: mikethemoose at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (vl3oo)

227 Very few Viking Kings died of old age.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (8Sqzu)

228 I would argue that the Mission Impossible TV show was pretty cookie cutter. They always faked out the target. The story was just about how. Like Columbo. You knew he was going to win*, you just watched to see how.


*wasn't there one where the killer got away?

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (fvaUx)

229 Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (MvHI3)

Yeah, 60 year old Active Fighter Pilot?

Uhhhh....

Posted by: Romeo13 at May 23, 2022 04:29 PM (oHd/0)

230 You know what I miss, good detective movies. Haven't seen one in a long time.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:29 PM (8Sqzu)

231 > I learned a new phrase yesterday. When you're doing something ineffectively, you're faffing about. Apparently it's not actually vulgar.

But when you're trying to sneak up and blackjack a guard in The City, you're taffin' about.

Posted by: me at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (9p+wn)

232 How is Arby's going to keep the hired help from swapping out the wagu burger with grocery store burger?

Posted by: torabora at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (Y274z)

233 I see, incidentally, the new Indiana Jones is supposed to be releasing in late July. Originally scheduled to be released in July 2019, it's now three years later so maybe they'll meet this date. Will I see it even though Harrison Ford is 150 years old? Yes, I've got a Jones jones.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, You Didn't Build That Back Better! at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (FVME7)

234 Medium and high magic doesn't logically jive with a gritty realistic primitive ancient world.
==
Wait wut? You're shitting us . . .

Posted by: The Aztecs at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (sLOOw)

235 Holy Crow, Jennifer Connelly took a nose dive out of the ugly tree and aimed for every branch on the way down. Sad.
Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (SH2Zi)
__________________

A few sandwiches may provide gainzzz in the appropriate places.

Posted by: Chuck Martel at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (fs1hN)

236 179 174 here's some head cannon to help you work through this: "Jim Phelps" is just a workname assigned to people in the IMF. the "Jim Phelps" of M:I 1996 is not the Jim Phelps of the 60s/70s series. I don't know if the ages would work anyway.
Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:20 PM (AkbRF)

=========

Peter Graves was asked to be Phelps in that movie, and he turned it down because of the twist.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (LvTSG)

Two new things I learned about Mission Impossible:

1. I knew that Lucille Ball was responsible for getting Star Trek off the ground (in more than simply producing the show), but I didn't know that she had a similar involvement with MI.

2. Graves wasn't the original boss in MI. That honor went to Steven Hill, and he had to withdraw because his Orthodox Jewish beliefs prevented him from attending shoots on Sabbath days (that, and being a little difficult on set when he was there). He didn't show up on TV again until Law and Order, where he was the first NY DA.

Posted by: Darrell Harris at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (zJKBU)

237 patrick, thanks, i'll put it on my list.

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (AkbRF)

238 221 Here's the Trailer for BULL I can't recommend this movie enough
https://tinyurl.com/2kdvswvy
Posted by: Patrick From Ohio at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (dKiJG)

Ok, I'm watching that

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (XvPQV)

239 Part of the reason they made two parts is because Cruise and the director decided that the movie, even though they finished shooting it, wasn't actually finished, since that allowed then to have total control. Also it let them add a submarine to it.

Posted by: Rbastid at May 23, 2022 04:16 PM (eh4B6)

"Here's the matériel request, Doctor. You'll notice there's a SUBMARINE on it! But don't get excited, we don't need anything atomic. Just your standard, ordinary sub. We're used to hardships."

Posted by: Dr Amusa at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (7bRMQ)

240 223 215 Pretty much all I watch is Oak Island and an occasional Ancient Aliens.

i watch skinwalker ranch, mostly because it's five miles from my high school.
-----------------
I've tried but every cast member annoys me.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (8Sqzu)

241 Dayum, you've got some standards.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (3aLWR)

She was naturally good looking. Too much plastic surgery makes her look like a skeleton with boobs. Age naturally, ladies.

Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:31 PM (SH2Zi)

242 233 I see, incidentally, the new Indiana Jones is supposed to be releasing in late July. Originally scheduled to be released in July 2019, it's now three years later so maybe they'll meet this date. Will I see it even though Harrison Ford is 150 years old? Yes, I've got a Jones jones.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, You Didn't Build That Back Better! at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (FVME7)

======

They had to shut filming down for months because Ford got injured.

And I believe the rumors that the female star of Fleabag is actually the star, and she's gonna be the best Indy that Indy could only ever dream of.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:31 PM (LvTSG)

243 I see, incidentally, the new Indiana Jones is supposed to be releasing in late July. Originally scheduled to be released in July 2019, it's now three years later so maybe they'll meet this date. Will I see it even though Harrison Ford is 150 years old? Yes, I've got a Jones jones.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, You Didn't Build That Back Better! at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (FVME7)


I had a Jones Jones, but some aliens killed it a few years ago.

Posted by: Wally at May 23, 2022 04:31 PM (S8gsF)

244 How is Arby's going to keep the hired help from swapping out the wagu burger with grocery store burger?

Going to the store to get something else vs. just using what comes in off the Arby's truck is a lot more work.

Posted by: Ian S. at May 23, 2022 04:31 PM (ZGrMX)

245 I use a Synology server (emby or Plex) to play my movies and shows. I buy the movies I can't get and upload them to my server and then resell them on Ebay so I really spend any money and make maybe a little profit. Especially movies like Zorro the Gay blade, knowing that movie WILL be delisted soon and other movies.

Posted by: Patrick From Ohio at May 23, 2022 04:32 PM (dKiJG)

246 >>>When you're doing something ineffectively, you're faffing about. Apparently it's not actually vulgar.

I don't know who gave you that definition but it's inaccurate. It more closely means "wasting time with frivolous stuff"

Posted by: mikethemoose at May 23, 2022 04:32 PM (vl3oo)

247 The most noble thing about Top Gun is how Goose died doing what he loved -- shattering his cranium against the canopy of an F-14.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at May 23, 2022 04:32 PM (vuisn)

248 Actor of the Day

David Warner was in Time Bandits with John Cleese, who was in The Big Picture with Kevin Bacon.

David Warner was in The League of Gentleman's Apocalypse with Bernard Hill, who was in The Lord of the Rings with Christopher Lee.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at May 23, 2022 04:32 PM (44ww/)

249 She was naturally good looking. Too much plastic surgery makes her look like a skeleton with boobs. Age naturally, ladies.
Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:31 PM (SH2Zi


She needs to eat a waygu burger or three but I wouldn't kick her boney butt out of the sheets.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:32 PM (3aLWR)

250 Which MI had the very very stupid runaway chunnel train scene?
Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022


***
That was the first one. Interesting trivia: Robert Towne, penner of Chinatown, wrote it. He lifted several elements from his only U.N.C.L.E. script: an Eastern European country, seen at night; at least one character drops off a bridge into water; and both end with a climax involving trains.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:32 PM (txdEq)

251 I found Scooby-Doo cartoons to be all the same too. Not high-brow stuff.

Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:32 PM (W6qhI)

252 199 All I tried to do was bring some life into their otherwise haze gray days and nights.

Posted by: Fat Leonard


the true tragedy of the bill cosby situation is that we'll never see any other parts of the leonard story. leonard part 6 is all there'll ever be.

Posted by: anachronda at May 23, 2022 04:32 PM (oY6Yp)

253 Yeah, 60 year old Active Fighter Pilot?

Uhhhh....
Posted by: Romeo13


Give 'em hell Randy Quaid!

Posted by: rickb223 TEXIT at May 23, 2022 04:33 PM (Uh6Mj)

254 1. I knew that Lucille Ball was responsible for getting Star Trek off the ground (in more than simply producing the show), but I didn't know that she had a similar involvement with MI.
----------------
Lucy was the real feminist. She sucked Louis B. Mayer's cock to become a movie actress and she ended up with her own studio and pioneered the TV market. She's quite impressive. The Manhattan Hags whining are not feminists.

Posted by: Puddin Head at May 23, 2022 04:33 PM (8Sqzu)

255 Age naturally, ladies.
Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:31 PM (SH2Zi)


On it.

Posted by: Jordan61 at May 23, 2022 04:33 PM (XCYLK)

256 I identified as 007 while I hid in the curtains.

Posted by: Comey at May 23, 2022 04:33 PM (Y274z)

257 Gwenyth Paltrow's new Uber Eats commercial is pretty funny! Too bad she didn't do something self deprecating with the vajayjay steaming!

Posted by: Mean Tweets at May 23, 2022 04:33 PM (BOJAx)

258 And I believe the rumors that the female star of Fleabag is actually the star, and she's gonna be the best Indy that Indy could only ever dream of.

That's Hollywood's go-to move now. I'm sure Guardians of the Galaxy 3 will have a female Groot that saves the day or something.

Posted by: Ian S. at May 23, 2022 04:34 PM (ZGrMX)

259 Here he is holding his stomach, again, along side some horse faced crow.

https://is.gd/d8NGAZ

Posted by: Braenyard at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (pBly4)

Holy Crow, Jennifer Connelly took a nose dive out of the ugly tree and aimed for every branch on the way down. Sad.
Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (SH2Zi)

What happened to her rack? Those tits used to be magical...

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:34 PM (XvPQV)

260 Age naturally, ladies.
___

Most of us have no choice.

Posted by: SMH at what's coming at May 23, 2022 04:34 PM (1+5Xl)

261 Gwenyth Paltrow's new Uber Eats commercial is pretty funny! Too bad she didn't do something self deprecating with the vajayjay steaming!
Posted by: Mean Tweets at May 23, 2022 04:33 PM (BOJAx)



Steamed clams?

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:34 PM (fvaUx)

262 Hayley Atwell > Rebecca Ferguson

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:34 PM (LvTSG)

263 Okay two highly recommended revenge movies

Black 42
The Foreigner

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:35 PM (jNAzB)

264 She was naturally good looking. Too much plastic surgery makes her look like a skeleton with boobs. Age naturally, ladies.
Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:31 PM (SH2Zi


Starvation diet, looks like. Boob fat is still fat.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:35 PM (3aLWR)

265
Northman
Interesting well made

Anna Taylor Joy is nekked a little

Posted by: Yo! Ultra Ultra MAGA at May 23, 2022 04:35 PM (KyswN)

266 I mostly watch golf or racing. Watching the IMSA Michelin Pilot Challenge race at Mid Ohio this past weekend. I'm exciting. I did golf today so I haven't been a total slug.

Posted by: Puddleglum at May 23, 2022 04:35 PM (sAmhv)

267 David Warner was in Time Bandits with John Cleese, who was in The Big Picture with Kevin Bacon.

Warner had a whole career in the 80s as a bad guy.

Posted by: Ian S. at May 23, 2022 04:35 PM (ZGrMX)

268 They'll make the movie work somehow. They'll just make Harrison Ford play one of the 2000-year-old mummies.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at May 23, 2022 04:35 PM (vuisn)

269 David Warner was in Time Bandits with John Cleese, who was in The Big Picture with Kevin Bacon.

David Warner was in The League of Gentleman's Apocalypse with Bernard Hill, who was in The Lord of the Rings with Christopher Lee.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at May 23, 2022 04:32 PM (44ww/)

Again, he was also in 'Cast a Deadly Spell', which I have a soft spot for. Hell of a voice.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:35 PM (XvPQV)

270 219 Cruise needs to find some scripts that feature a grizzled old sage who saves the day with his keen intellect, and amuses the babes with his dazzling wit. The young male lead can be a well-meaning but not too bright guy whose brawn and bravado are just no match for the old-timer's experience and intelligence.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (MvHI3)

As in: Why don't we just walk down there and fuck them all.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at May 23, 2022 04:35 PM (Qhnrt)

271 236 2. Graves wasn't the original boss in MI. That honor went to Steven Hill

and, notably for head-canon boy, steven hill's character wasn't jim phelps.

Posted by: anachronda at May 23, 2022 04:35 PM (oY6Yp)

272 Wait , I haven't even seen Top Gun II yet!

Posted by: runner at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (F1vmP)

273
Here he is holding his stomach, again, along side some horse faced crow.

https://is.gd/d8NGAZ

Posted by: Braenyard at May 23, 2022 04:21 PM (pBly4)


You can really see the lifts he's wearing on his feet. Almost as bad as Al Pacino's.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (n+4am)

274 That's Hollywood's go-to move now. I'm sure Guardians of the Galaxy 3 will have a female Groot that saves the day or something.
Posted by: Ian S. at May 23, 2022 04:34 PM (ZGrMX)


Filmed in Chicago

Posted by: Mayor Lightfoot at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (S8gsF)

275 I like climaxing with a train!

Posted by: Lena Dunham at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (Y274z)

276 Apropos of nothing, I'd like to see a Red Bull plane fly the length of the Chunnel.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (fvaUx)

277 And don't let the fact that Jackie Chan is the star of The Foreigner. Quality acting all around.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (jNAzB)

278 here are two more fun facts about Mission Impossible:

1, the show is based on an old book of cons and grifts. The creator, Bruce Geller I think, was trying to think of some novel scenario to use these old cons and grifts in and came up with the idea of a covert espionage team that uses them. All of the stuff the IMF team does is just crap they do in The Sting.


2, Geller wanted the show to seem like it was in foreign countries but he wanted Americans to understand the signage. So he made up fake foreign-sounding words to put on signs and such that looked foreign but whose meaning would be readily apparent. Like "GASZ" for gasoline and stuff like that. Sometimes just with umlauts and other diacritical marks thrown on vowels to look foreign-ey.

The production staff called this made-up fake foreign language "Gellerese."

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (AkbRF)

279 It wasn't their fault that MI2 was bad. The doves went on strike.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (44ww/)

280 I have completed my scientific analysis of the common house spider on a truck windshield. My observations show it is capable of holding on up to a speed of 44 mph.
Observations suggest higher speeds are possible if not trying to reposition so the wind wasn't blowing up its ass.

Posted by: Diogenes at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (kXi5T)

281 Rewatched both Sicario movies yesterday.

Well worth it. Hope they round out the trio.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (3aLWR)

282 rickb a BAR is a good crime stopper
Posted by: Skip


Yes it is!

True, but L4 Bren way more betterer.

Posted by: NZFrank with an M2 at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (bgJ0E)

283
I like The Critical Drinker, but his recommendations are Crap. He likes almost everything.

For instance: The Mandalorian, The Boys.

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (SfHsb)

284 When you're doing something ineffectively, you're faffing about. Apparently it's not actually vulgar.

I don't know who gave you that definition but it's inaccurate. It more closely means "wasting time with frivolous stuff"


https://tinyurl.com/3zw75p7z

If you say that someone is faffing about or faffing around, you mean that they are doing things in a disorganized way and not achieving very much.

Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (ZsR3z)

285 At least The Northman got to bang the girl from Netflix mini series Queens Gambit, so there’s that.🤷🏼‍♂️

Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (W6qhI)

286 David Warner was a great Bob Crachet with George C Scott

Posted by: Indignatio Vindacatorem at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (oWBc3)

287 2. Graves wasn't the original boss in MI. That honor went to Steven Hill, and he had to withdraw because his Orthodox Jewish beliefs prevented him from attending shoots on Sabbath days (that, and being a little difficult on set when he was there). He didn't show up on TV again until Law and Order, where he was the first NY DA.
Posted by: Darrell Harris at May 23, 2022


***
Yes, as Dan Briggs, who always seemed like the intellectual chess-master kind of spy. Bruce Geller, the creator and exec on MI, wanted Hill especially for the role. But Hill's difficulty on set came from his religion. The show was a hard shoot, running over on Friday nights and shooting on Saturdays, and of course that was a no-no for any strict observing Jew. He kept leaving early and refusing to work on Saturday. Eventually Geller shot around him, and replaced him.

Hill's best performances are some of the very best MI episodes of them all.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (txdEq)

288 And don't let the fact that Jackie Chan is the star of The Foreigner. Quality acting all around.
Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (jNAzB)

He’s hot blooded.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (43LzH)

289
Yeah, 60 year old Active Fighter Pilot?

Uhhhh....
____________

That's why Cruise as grizzled old timer will be in his study, sitting in the armchair solving the cases with his superior brain power (have to make Cruise the hero of the movie, or he won't want to be in it). The young male lead will be the action guy, but he'll always get shown up by Cruise's character.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (MvHI3)

290 Waygu burger at Arby's.
Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:20 PM (3aLWR)

Nooooooo!

Posted by: Hope Solo, Drunken Whore at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (VghRo)

291 248 Actor of the Day

David Warner was in Time Bandits with John Cleese, who was in The Big Picture with Kevin Bacon.

David Warner was in The League of Gentleman's Apocalypse with Bernard Hill, who was in The Lord of the Rings with Christopher Lee.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at May 23, 2022 04:32 PM (44ww/)

David Warner also played 3 races in Star Trek: he was the human ambassador in STV: The Final Frontier, the Klingon Chancellor in STVI: The Undiscovered Country, and he was the Cardassian Interrogator Gul Madred in the TNG two-parter ""Chain of Command".

Posted by: Thrawn at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (Rl7KJ)

292 Since Kidman, all his scenes with women look very staged and fake.

Posted by: runner at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (F1vmP)

293 Looking forward to uncomplicated entertainment where no one has to tell me their fucking pronouns.

Posted by: Joe Biden's teleprompter at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (D04pU)

294 A few sandwiches may provide gainzzz in the appropriate places.

Posted by: Chuck Martel at May 23, 2022 04:30 PM (fs1hN)

That's what I am saying.

Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:38 PM (SH2Zi)

295 Have I told you about my part in a Hollywood film?

Posted by: Sleepy Joe at May 23, 2022 04:38 PM (Y274z)

296 Warner had a whole career in the 80s as a bad guy.
Posted by: Ian S. at May 23, 2022 04:35 PM (ZGrMX)


Well, except for The Man With Two Brains.

Posted by: Jordan61 at May 23, 2022 04:38 PM (XCYLK)

297 re: gellerese, sometimes they use real foreign languages. In Spanish speaking countries, they use mostly real spanish, and in Germanic type countries (many fictitious, like "The European People's Republic") the cop cars will say "POLIZEI" on them, which is the actual German word for police. But that's a case where the foreign word was already in 'Gellerese," where its English meaning was already readily apparent.

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:38 PM (AkbRF)

298 Looked up Jennifer today, yeah years are not looking kind

Posted by: Skip at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (2JoB8)

299 I have to say I'm not thrilled with the prospect of Ethan Hunt's ex-wife being a part of this movie, even as a partial McGuffin, but it isn't like I'm not going to watch that movie no matter what. Dude looks faster on foot at 60 than I ever have.

Posted by: Octochicken at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (oCS0o)

300 Jennifer Connolly is in her early 50s now. FYI.

Posted by: Puddleglum at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (sAmhv)

301 I think Anna Taylor -Joy is weird looking. I avoid her movies because I think she looks like what a very attractive space alien might look like.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (Ut+C0)

302 Bought a very old Tom Cruise movie called "Losin' It" the other day, because my brother has a part in it as an extra, in a few scenes and one good closeup at the end (he's one of the border guards that take apart the car at the end of the movie).

Posted by: AshevilleRobert at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (fv27Y)

303 And don't let the fact that Jackie Chan is the star of The Foreigner. Quality acting all around.
Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (jNAzB)

He’s hot blooded.
Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (43LzH)

Well, it is a Monday. A day like any other day.

Posted by: Wally at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (S8gsF)

304 @281 AlaBAMA-I’ve heard they’re going to totally fuck up Sicario by bringing back that redhead dolt chick from the first one.

Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (W6qhI)

305 Those wagu burgers look great in my refer.

Posted by: Arby's Hired Help at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (Y274z)

306 Blood Rain, serial Murder in Old Korea, I really liked this movie because it had a good Christian theme about it.
https://tinyurl.com/46b8ea75

Same For DETECTIVE K murder mystery comedy that also has a strong Catholic theme.

Posted by: Patrick From Ohio at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (dKiJG)

307 That's why Cruise as grizzled old timer will be in his study, sitting in the armchair solving the cases with his superior brain power (have to make Cruise the hero of the movie, or he won't want to be in it). The young male lead will be the action guy, but he'll always get shown up by Cruise's character.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (MvHI3)



The younger is a CGI de-aged clone. So TC gets both billings.


Brilliant! - Will Smith

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:40 PM (fvaUx)

308 Looking forward to uncomplicated entertainment where no one has to tell me their fucking pronouns.
Posted by: Joe Biden's teleprompter at May 23, 2022 04:37 PM (D04pU)

Try looking backwards, there's more choices.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at May 23, 2022 04:40 PM (MFphb)

309 "A skeleton with boobs."

Ho ho. A skeleton... with boobs.

(tears envelope)

"What do you call Nancy Pelosi standing with Chuck Schumer and Mitch McConnell? "

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:40 PM (WvPpP)

310 The Thin Man.

Posted by: Infidel at May 23, 2022 04:41 PM (E0NVW)

311 262 Hayley Atwell > Rebecca Ferguson
===================

Hayley Atwell's knockers > Rebecca Ferguson's

Posted by: Joe Biden's teleprompter at May 23, 2022 04:41 PM (D04pU)

312 I loved the first Top Gun movie, I don't care how gay it is. It didn't make me gay and I enjoyed it so win/win.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 04:41 PM (DcKNO)

313 I think Anna Taylor -Joy is weird looking. I avoid her movies because I think she looks like what a very attractive space alien might look like.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (Ut+C0)


I agree. Personally I thought she looked much better with dark hair, like in Split and Glass.

Posted by: Jordan61 at May 23, 2022 04:41 PM (XCYLK)

314 1, the show is based on an old book of cons and grifts. The creator, Bruce Geller I think, was trying to think of some novel scenario to use these old cons and grifts in and came up with the idea of a covert espionage team that uses them. All of the stuff the IMF team does is just crap they do in The Sting. . . .

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022


***
Very early on they realized that they could not keep doing safecracking kind of stories forever. The episode "Rogosh" introduced the con artist element, and they used it forever after.

There were 2 U.N.C.L.E. episodes that exactly prefigured these techniques 2 years before. I've always wondered if Geller saw those. . . .

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:41 PM (txdEq)

315 228 I would argue that the Mission Impossible TV show was pretty cookie cutter. They always faked out the target. The story was just about how. Like Columbo. You knew he was going to win*, you just watched to see how.


*wasn't there one where the killer got away?


you mean the one were faye dunaway and babylon 5's susan ivanova team up to kill a mutual lover?

Posted by: anachronda at May 23, 2022 04:41 PM (oY6Yp)

316 304 @281 AlaBAMA-I’ve heard they’re going to totally fuck up Sicario by bringing back that redhead dolt chick from the first one.
Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (W6qhI


Emily Blunt? Kinda liked her in Edge of Tomorrow. She was pretty one dimensional in Sicario. Either tough girl or upset girl.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:41 PM (3aLWR)

317
On it.
Posted by: Jordan61 at May 23, 2022 04:33 PM (XCYLK)


Her Majesty at 18 with her first win:
https://soyaraborzoi.com/LanishkaPatterson.jpg

Her Majesty 25 years later with a win under the same judge:
https://soyaraborzoi.com/PossumPatterson.jpg

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 23, 2022 04:41 PM (/U27+)

318 Try looking backwards, there's more choices.
Posted by: OneEyedJack
___

Yep.

Posted by: SMH at what's coming at May 23, 2022 04:41 PM (1+5Xl)

319 Age naturally, ladies.
___

Most of us have no choice.

Posted by: SMH at what's coming at May 23, 2022 04:34 PM (1+5Xl)

And are more beautiful because of it.

Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (SH2Zi)

320 >>>I think Anna Taylor -Joy is weird looking.

I would like to be with her, because she always looks surprised and shocked, and I would like to see that face when I show her my weiner.

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (AkbRF)

321 Don't forget David Warner lost his head in The Omen.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (vuisn)

322 301 I think Anna Taylor -Joy is weird looking. I avoid her movies because I think she looks like what a very attractive space alien might look like.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 04:39 PM (Ut+C0)

It's a shame. Because the girl thinks she is ugly and she is not.

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (WvPpP)

323 Ok, who's gonna watch Obi-Wan Kenobi in a few days?

Posted by: runner at May 23, 2022 04:43 PM (F1vmP)

324 311 262 Hayley Atwell > Rebecca Ferguson
===================

Hayley Atwell's knockers > Rebecca Ferguson's
Posted by: Joe Biden's teleprompter at May 23, 2022 04:41 PM (D04pU)

========

I like Hayley's accent more, too.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:43 PM (LvTSG)

325 On it.

Posted by: Jordan61 at May 23, 2022 04:33 PM (XCYLK)

You have nothing to worry about.

Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:43 PM (SH2Zi)

326 I think Anna Taylor -Joy is weird looking. I avoid her movies because I think she looks like what a very attractive space alien might look like.

She is weird looking. Like an anime character came to life. I'd like to trade her to Japan for something useful.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 23, 2022 04:43 PM (ppBhU)

327 I would like to be with her, because she always looks surprised and shocked, and I would like to see that face when I show her my weiner.
Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (AkbRF)

I believe the current term is "chorizo," spicy boy.

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (okGHj)

328 What I liked best about Sicario is that the almost supernaturally god-like reflexes action chick was...completely out of her depth and utterly lost when it came to how the real world worked.

I had a hard time getting over my initial dislike of her action girl schtict the first few times trying to watch Sicario. But I'm glad I pushed past it, that movie is so, so good.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (XvPQV)

329 Definition of faff
dialectal, British
: to make a fuss over nothing

Again whomever gave you the definition is wrong. "faffing about" can refer to any frivolous waste of time, not just being ineffective at a task.

Posted by: mikethemoose at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (vl3oo)

330 @259 Mark Andrew Edwards-Jennifer Connelly boobs were spectacular in Inventing The Abbotts.

Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (W6qhI)

331 Cruz lives in a tree and makes cookies.

Posted by: klaftern at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (taPSh)

332 >>>I think Anna Taylor -Joy is weird looking.

I would like to be with her, because she always looks surprised and shocked, and I would like to see that face when I show her my weiner.

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (AkbRF)

lol - Yeah an unfiltered image search reveals exactly that of which you speak.

Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (SH2Zi)

333 323 Ok, who's gonna watch Obi-Wan Kenobi in a few days?
Posted by: runner at May 23, 2022 04:43 PM (F1vmP

I don't give Apple my money except once every six years when I break a phone.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (3aLWR)

334 Been working all day. A movie thread?

Watched "Land of the Pharaohs" this weekend. Didn't realize it until my daughter pointed it out, but Joan Collins' chief henchman was played by Charlie Chaplin's son Sydney. Once I saw it, it was pretty obvious.

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (906pl)

335 Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (WvPpP)

Anna Taylor Joy thinks she is ugly? I doubt. And I didn't say she was ugly; I said I think she's weird looking.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (Ut+C0)

336 It's a shame. Because the girl thinks she is ugly and she is not.
Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (WvPpP)



Big eyes, small chin = high estrogen. I bet she is unbearably attractive if you are close enough to be in her pheromone cloud.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (fvaUx)

337 David Warner was in Star Trek TNG, and like a number of people on that show, later was a voice in Gargoyles.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (44ww/)

338 I got about 3/4 through the review and I was thinking to myself "Maybe I should just watch Conan again instead" and then Ace says "Just watch Conan the Barbarian again"

Don't ever change, Ace.

Posted by: Chuck C at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (hOAT3)

339 Damn, a for real movie review.

Posted by: Ben Had at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (+5mw1)

340 I would like to be with her, because she always looks surprised and shocked, and I would like to see that face when I show her my wiener.
Posted by: ace
___

An ewok in a trenchcoat flashing unsuspecting women (and men) would draw similar looks.

Posted by: SMH at what's coming at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (1+5Xl)

341 Jennifer Connelly boobs were spectacular in Inventing The Abbotts.
Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (W6qhI)

*Nods*

And Career Opportunities

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (XvPQV)

342 Speaking of Anya, I watched Last Night in Soho again this weekend.

So giallo. Not for everyone, but I sort of love it.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (LvTSG)

343 She was naturally good looking. Too much plastic surgery makes her look like a skeleton with boobs. Age naturally, ladies.
___________

I was watching that Hulu series about the Theranos scandal over the weekend. Anne Archer plays Mrs. George Schultz in it. I was surprised at how rough she looks. I also had not seen Laurie Metcalf in a long time, and I was surprised by how old she looks now.

The series was pretty good. The lead actress did a credible job playing Elizabeth Holmes and showcasing her narcissism. It still astonishes me how much that crook got away with, and is still getting away with.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (MvHI3)

344 >>>I think Anna Taylor -Joy is weird looking.

I would like to be with her, because she always looks surprised and shocked, and I would like to see that face when I show her my weiner.
Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (AkbRF)

Heh. Yeah you don't want someone that giggles at everything.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (jNAzB)

345 Holy Crow, Jennifer Connelly took a nose dive out of the ugly tree and aimed for every branch on the way down. Sad.
Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:26 PM (SH2Zi)

What happened to her rack? Those tits used to be magical...

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse


She had 'em reduced. I don't know why. It was sometime before that excreble remake of "The Day The Earth Stood Still".

Posted by: Brother Tim, #teamheadsonpikes at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (OUMaO)

346 I think Anna Taylor -Joy is weird looking.

I would like to be with her, because she always looks surprised and shocked, and I would like to see that face when I show her my weiner.
Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022


***
Anna looks like an elf. Not the LOTR kind, but another race that leads lost travelers up into the mist and devour them.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (txdEq)

347 Speaking of Anya, I watched Last Night in Soho again this weekend.

So giallo. Not for everyone, but I sort of love it.


This is an awful film on every level. Promethius is Shakespeare by comparison.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 23, 2022 04:46 PM (ppBhU)

348 Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (AkbRF)

Your weiner is so odd looking that she'd be surprised or shocked?

Or-response 2-maybe you shouldn't show her your weiner. She might be a vegetarian

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 04:46 PM (Ut+C0)

349
Headline in Chemical and Engineering News

"Solar panels face recycling challenge
Researchers and companies are preparing for a looming tsunami of photovoltaic waste"

Who could have foreseen that??

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 23, 2022 04:47 PM (/U27+)

350 259 Mark Andrew Edwards-Jennifer Connelly boobs were spectacular in Inventing The Abbotts.
Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (W6qhI)

Only good thing about that movie.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:47 PM (jNAzB)

351 I would like to be with her, because she always looks surprised and shocked, and I would like to see that face when I show her my weiner.

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (AkbRF)

You could do that with any girl.

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:47 PM (YlyXg)

352 Somehow this thread is about me.

Posted by: Nina the Jank at May 23, 2022 04:47 PM (TKZuJ)

353 228 The story was just about how. Like Columbo. You knew he was going to win*, you just watched to see how.


*wasn't there one where the killer got away?


or maybe you mean the one where the elderly dancer kills her husband who wouldn't fund her comeback, but has a brain aneurysm and a) doesn't have long to live and b) has already forgotten she did it.

Posted by: anachronda at May 23, 2022 04:47 PM (oY6Yp)

354 I would like to be with her, because she always looks surprised and shocked, and I would like to see that face when I show her my wiener.
Posted by: ace

---------

hhahhahah

The surprised face then a smile.

None of the usual, "I'm shocked it's so small."

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 04:47 PM (DcKNO)

355 Somehow this thread is about me.

Posted by: Nina the Jank at May 23, 2022 04:47 PM (TKZuJ)

You're so vain.

Posted by: Carly Simon at May 23, 2022 04:48 PM (SH2Zi)

356 In Conan, the gods are kept off-screen and magic is kept pretty minimal, with one big exception (Conan's resurrection).

There's also "Do you want to live forever"

Posted by: Valeria at May 23, 2022 04:48 PM (hOAT3)

357 Anna looks like an elf. Not the LOTR kind, but another race that leads lost travelers up into the mist and devour them.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022


***
Okay, who's up for a movie with Anna Taylor-Joy and model Lily Cole as The Abductor Elves?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 04:48 PM (txdEq)

358 It's kinda refreshing to see Cruise finally showing some age. Luckily for him though, I have to admit it looks good on him. Depp, otoh, is also showing his age, but not in a complimentary way.

Posted by: Lady in Black at May 23, 2022 04:48 PM (sVtYq)

359 @316 AlaBAMA-Yeah Emily Blunt. They’re gonna bring her do gooder ass back I believe to go after De Toros character. Read about it online. Sounds like they’re going to screw up the movie.

Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:48 PM (W6qhI)

360
WTF?

On the fake weather website "accuweather" right now:

"Asteroid the size of 350 giraffes to fly past Earth this week"

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:48 PM (SfHsb)

361
What was that thing about giraffes we were talking about a few weeks ago??

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:49 PM (SfHsb)

362 "Asteroid the size of 350 giraffes to fly past Earth this week"

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:48 PM (SfHsb)

That seems like a lot of giraffes.

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at May 23, 2022 04:49 PM (okGHj)

363 341 Jennifer Connelly boobs were spectacular in Inventing The Abbotts.
Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (W6qhI)

*Nods*

And Career Opportunities
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (XvPQV)

The Rocketeer

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at May 23, 2022 04:49 PM (Qhnrt)

364 Again whomever gave you the definition is wrong. "faffing about" can refer to any frivolous waste of time, not just being ineffective at a task.

I gave you the link. Take it up with them.

As an aside, this may just be the most AOSHQ argument ever.

Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:49 PM (ZsR3z)

365 "Asteroid the size of 350 giraffes to fly past Earth this week"

Posted by: Soothsayer
___

Yeah, about a mile wide, over two million miles away.

On the 27th, will be able to see with a telescope.

Posted by: SMH at what's coming at May 23, 2022 04:49 PM (1+5Xl)

366 WTF?

On the fake weather website "accuweather" right now:

"Asteroid the size of 350 giraffes to fly past Earth this week"

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:48 PM (SfHsb)

You were expecting a different animal of measurement?

Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:50 PM (SH2Zi)

367 316 AlaBAMA-Yeah Emily Blunt. They’re gonna bring her do gooder ass back I believe to go after De Toros character. Read about it online. Sounds like they’re going to screw up the movie.
Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:48 PM (W6qhI)

De Toros character was the definite anti hero who became an evil villain to me.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:50 PM (jNAzB)

368 140
It'll be interesting to watch all the intentional "rolling brown-outs" in California, this Summer. I wonder if the "brown-outs" will happen in other states. I suspect so.

I wonder if People will finally have Enough of being part of the left's social engineering.
----
Missouri and Illinois at risk for rolling blackouts during energy shortage
https://is.gd/BoQ9HT

Posted by: Ciampino at May 23, 2022 04:50 PM (qfLjt)

369 Oh, oh, Ace-Now you've done it. You've opened the floodgates for weiner witticisms.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 04:50 PM (Ut+C0)

370 "Asteroid the size of 350 giraffes to fly past Earth this week"

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:48 PM (SfHsb)

---

Who measures asteroid size in giraffes?

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 04:50 PM (DcKNO)

371 What was that thing about giraffes we were talking about a few weeks ago??

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:49 PM (SfHsb)

It was literally that.

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:50 PM (YlyXg)

372 If I had written the script for Conan, I would have left out the part where he turns into a snake. Everything else was relatively subtle before that.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at May 23, 2022 04:51 PM (44ww/)

373
Is it me or is this the second time they used Giraffes as a metering device??

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:51 PM (SfHsb)

374 Depp, otoh, is also showing his age, but not in a complimentary way.
_____________

Looking at some of the closer still shots of Depp from the trial, you can see that he's wearing foundation on his face and neck, and some eyeliner on his lower lashes. It's more subtle that his usual look, but still visible.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at May 23, 2022 04:51 PM (MvHI3)

375 Asteroid the size of 350 giraffes


Is that 350 side by side? End to end? Or smished into a giraffe paste of some kind?

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:51 PM (fvaUx)

376 Oh, oh, Ace-Now you've done it. You've opened the floodgates for weiner witticisms.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 04:50 PM (Ut+C0)

Fen said weiner.

Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:51 PM (SH2Zi)

377 Somehow this thread is about me.

Posted by: Nina the Jank at May 23, 2022 04:47 PM (TKZuJ)

-----

That made me laugh.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 04:52 PM (DcKNO)

378 For those who want to change insurance companies (from Legal Insurrection):
"State Farm is partnering with The GenderCool Project to help diversify classroom, community center and library bookshelves with a collection of brooks to help bring clarity and understanding to the national conversation about Being Transgender, Inclusive and Non-Binary. The project's goal is to increase representation of LGBTQ+ books and support our communities in having challenging, important and empowering conversations with children Age 5+"

Posted by: Chuck C at May 23, 2022 04:52 PM (hOAT3)

379 301
Her eye spacing kind of make her look like the sloth in Ice Age.

Posted by: Dr. Claw at May 23, 2022 04:52 PM (2OL6m)

380 In trying to do the "real story" behind Hamlet, it seems like Emleth forgot or ignored what actually made the original Hamlet so great. It's not the story, which is a rather ordinary revenge tale. Rather, the story is just a hook to hang the Truly Important parts on, and those are the in-depth discussions of the nature of Life and Death, and Murder, and Suicide, and Revenge which are the true heart of the play. I would go so far to say that Hamlet is a better and more realistic discussion of the philosophy behind those concepts than any actual philosophy book written in the 500 years since.

And as to the main character - the story is NOT "how does he gain his revenge?" but rather, How does Hamlet maintain his personal integrity while doing all of this?

Posted by: Tom Servo at May 23, 2022 04:52 PM (trdmm)

381
How does one measure a giraffe?

In "hands," or feet, or...chihuahuas??

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:52 PM (SfHsb)

382 The space rock, known as 7335 (1989 JA) won’t fly past particularly near to Earth - the closest it will get is 2.5 million miles, 10 times the distance between the Earth and the moon.

https://tinyurl.com/2p9e3e5f

SMOD being a tease, as usual.

Posted by: SMH at what's coming at May 23, 2022 04:52 PM (1+5Xl)

383 Fen said weiner.

Heh. Heh Heh. Heh Heh Heh.

Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:52 PM (ZsR3z)

384 The weather channel can get fucked with a 2 giraffe tall flaming pineapple.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 23, 2022 04:53 PM (43LzH)

385 Nice Peter Gabriel in the sidebar.

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 23, 2022 04:53 PM (pmFfT)

386 369 Oh, oh, Ace-Now you've done it. You've opened the floodgates for weiner witticisms.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 04:50 PM (Ut+C0)

And there is NOTHING funny about Weiners...

Posted by: Anthony Weiner... at May 23, 2022 04:53 PM (oHd/0)

387 Interesting the giraffe is now an astronomical unit of measurement. Weird, but interesting nonetheless.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at May 23, 2022 04:53 PM (BFigT)

388 De Toros character was the definite anti hero who became an evil villain to me.
Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:50 PM (jNAzB)



He's somewhat redeemed in Day of the Solado. Plus is infinitely tough.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:53 PM (fvaUx)

389 377 Somehow this thread is about me.

Posted by: Nina the Jank at May 23, 2022 04:47 PM (TKZuJ)

-----

That made me laugh.
Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 04:52 PM (DcKNO)

---

What's still making me laugh is whoever dubbed her the Wicked Witch of the Woke.

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at May 23, 2022 04:54 PM (906pl)

390 That's only 233.33 Giraffe and a halfs.

Posted by: zombie Shel Silverstein at May 23, 2022 04:54 PM (vrz2I)

391 Missouri and Illinois at risk for rolling blackouts during energy shortage
https://is.gd/BoQ9HT
___

Figures.

Posted by: SMH at what's coming at May 23, 2022 04:54 PM (1+5Xl)

392 rolling brown-outs" in California, this Summer

Hoping that living this close to a hospital will mean neighborhood power stays lit.

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenko Solutions at May 23, 2022 04:54 PM (Iz2Z7)

393 LOL suspended from twitter again.

I responded to a Tony Evers pro abortion post with " Death to the babies!"

Twitter seems to think I was threatening someone.

Posted by: Diesel Jones, Biologist at May 23, 2022 04:54 PM (Vu7A1)

394 381
How does one measure a giraffe?

In "hands," or feet, or...chihuahuas??
Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:52 PM (SfHsb)

Duh, with a very tall ladder!

Posted by: Romeo13 at May 23, 2022 04:54 PM (oHd/0)

395
And there is NOTHING funny about Weiners...
Posted by: Anthony Weiner.
__________

I dunno, some of that testimony about the appearance of Harvey Weinstein's weiner in his sex assault trial was downright hilarious.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at May 23, 2022 04:54 PM (MvHI3)

396 I'm so glad that the Broccoli family killed off Bond. It's been clear for more than a decade that pretty much everybody could make a better Bond film than Bond. A cheap stunt was the perfect way to end years of arrested creativity.

Posted by: Rusty Nail at May 23, 2022 04:55 PM (E775d)

397 That's only 233.33 Giraffe and a halfs.

You're using metric giraffes. We use Imperial giraffes around here.

Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:55 PM (ZsR3z)

398 "State Farm is partnering with The GenderCool Project to help diversify classroom, community center and library bookshelves with a collection of brooks to help bring clarity and understanding to the national conversation about Being Transgender, Inclusive and Non-Binary. The project's goal is to increase representation of LGBTQ+ books and support our communities in having challenging, important and empowering conversations with children Age 5+"

Posted by: Chuck C at May 23, 2022 04:52 PM (hOAT3)

Now they can change their name to Funny Farm.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at May 23, 2022 04:55 PM (VwHCD)

399 >>>I gave you the link. Take it up with them.

Yes you gave me the link. I'm taking it up with you.
But since you like links fine.

Cambridge. http://bitly.ws/rD7f
Or the free dict. http://bitly.ws/rD7t

I could keep going.

Posted by: mikethemoose at May 23, 2022 04:55 PM (vl3oo)

400 Jennifer Connelly boobs were spectacular in Inventing The Abbotts.
Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (W6qhI)

*Nods*

And Career Opportunities
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:45 PM (XvPQV)

The Rocketeer
Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at May 23, 2022 04:49 PM (Qhnrt)
Oh yes!

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at May 23, 2022 04:55 PM (XvPQV)

401 I’ll start measuring all my fiber footage in giraffes. The guys will love that.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 23, 2022 04:55 PM (43LzH)

402 Giraffes are only acceptable as a unit of measure if you include a banana for scale.

Posted by: Brother Tim, #teamheadsonpikes at May 23, 2022 04:55 PM (OUMaO)

403 He's somewhat redeemed in Day of the Solado. Plus is infinitely tough.
Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:53 PM (fvaUx)

Didn't see the sequel but murdering kids had to be hard to redeem. I still like the movie though. Life is full of people making sausage that you don't want to know about.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:55 PM (jNAzB)

404
btw, did you see the fake pic of the "black hole?"

Two images, in fact. Of a black hole.

Sure.

99% of all NASA's images are fake. "Recreations" of what they "imagine" something to look like.

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:55 PM (SfHsb)

405 393 LOL suspended from twitter again.

I responded to a Tony Evers pro abortion post with " Death to the babies!"

Twitter seems to think I was threatening someone.
Posted by: Diesel Jones, Biologist at May 23, 2022 04:54 PM (Vu7A1)

------

I called celebrity women who were screaming about abortion "sluts." maybe I deserved it. But truth is truth.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 04:55 PM (DcKNO)

406 It'll be interesting to watch all the intentional "rolling brown-outs" in California, this Summer. I wonder if the "brown-outs" will happen in other states. I suspect so.

We all need to make sacrifices to fight gerbil warbling!

Just wait until the diesel starts running out this summer...

Posted by: California! at May 23, 2022 04:56 PM (I2/tG)

407 0.35 kili-raffes.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at May 23, 2022 04:56 PM (44ww/)

408 And there is NOTHING funny about Weiners...

Posted by: Anthony Weiner... at May 23, 2022 04:53 PM (oHd/0)

The wonderful thing about weiners Is weiners are wonderful things. Their tops are made out of rubber, Their bottoms are made out of springs.
They're bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy, Fun, fun, fun, fun, fun.

Posted by: Bootygig at May 23, 2022 04:56 PM (SH2Zi)

409 @350 Anti doesn’t matter-Inventing The Abbotts also had Joanna Going in it. Another reason for watching it. The older brother was the hero of that movie for me👍

Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:56 PM (W6qhI)

410 Now they can change their name to Funny Farm.
____________

Groomer Farm.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at May 23, 2022 04:56 PM (MvHI3)

411 I could keep going.

And probably will.

Posted by: Archimedes at May 23, 2022 04:57 PM (ZsR3z)

412 You have to eat 300 giraffes of your regular cereal to equal one giraffe of Colon Blow.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at May 23, 2022 04:57 PM (44ww/)

413
"Energy Shortages"

This is how bloody Revolutions start.

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:57 PM (SfHsb)

414 I think Anna Taylor -Joy is weird looking. I avoid her movies because I think she looks like what a very attractive space alien might look like.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke

Anna looks like an elf. Not the LOTR kind, but another race that leads lost travelers up into the mist and devour them.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius


Based on a quick image search, she's quite hot if she has a hairstyle that hides the corners of her eyes.

If her hair is pulled back, her eyes extend past the edges of her skull, somehow.

It might have something to do with that discussion earlier today about variable physics constants and the size of the universe.

Posted by: mikeski at May 23, 2022 04:57 PM (P1f+c)

415
"The camel deserved it" LOL! Great line.

One of my favorite scenes in the original Conan was when he finds the "Atlantean Sword" in the old barrow. I've described that as a scene that out-Tolkien's Tolkien, it is absolutely perfect at creating the mood and the feel of being in an ancient grave like that.

And there's a nice visual thing at the end of that scene, when he emerges with the sword and the wolves are still outside. You aren't shown what happens, but in the very next scene Conan is wearing a thick coat made of wolfskins.

Posted by: Tom Servo at May 23, 2022 04:57 PM (trdmm)

416 Nice Peter Gabriel in the sidebar.

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 23, 2022 04:53 PM

Yes, but I don't know how anyone could classify Shock the Monkey as forgotten.

Posted by: Rusty Nail at May 23, 2022 04:57 PM (E775d)

417 I'm still enjoying the name Donkey Chompers for AOC.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 04:57 PM (DcKNO)

418 Is a wiener a sandwich or not?

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 04:58 PM (jNAzB)

419 FIRST!!!!!

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden at May 23, 2022 04:58 PM (Zz0t1)

420 Like a gay neighbor....

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 04:58 PM (hfvc1)

421 Color me I don't care.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden at May 23, 2022 04:58 PM (Zz0t1)

422 >>>I think Anna Taylor -Joy is weird looking.

I would like to be with her, because she always looks surprised and shocked, and I would like to see that face when I show her my weiner.

Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:42 PM (AkbRF)

Anna Taylor >>>>>>>Anna Taylor-Joy
tinyurl.com/23ystaen >>>>>>>tinyurl.com/bde6bb5a

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 23, 2022 04:58 PM (7bRMQ)

423 If her hair is pulled back, her eyes extend past the edges of her skull, somehow.

She can detect her prey even if straight to the side.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:58 PM (fvaUx)

424 Yes, but I don't know how anyone could classify Shock the Monkey as forgotten.
Posted by: Rusty Nail at May 23, 2022 04:57 PM (E775d)



I was shocked!

Posted by: The Monkey at May 23, 2022 04:59 PM (OK0YZ)

425 386 369 Oh, oh, Ace-Now you've done it. You've opened the floodgates for weiner witticisms.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 04:50 PM (Ut+C0)

And there is NOTHING funny about Weiners...
----
I know what a wiener is but what's a Weiner, other than that imbecile dick married to Huma.

Posted by: Ciampino at May 23, 2022 04:59 PM (qfLjt)

426 Yes, but I don't know how anyone could classify Shock the Monkey as forgotten.
Posted by: Rusty Nail at May 23, 2022 04:57 PM (E775d)

Well Ace forgot about it.

Posted by: Tom Servo at May 23, 2022 04:59 PM (trdmm)

427 217 The Critical Drinker has a very positive review of Everything Everywhere All At Once on YouTube today. I wasn't going to bother but maybe I'll give it a shot.
Posted by: Mark1971 at May 23, 2022 04:02 PM (xPl2J)

You'll regret that decision. It's not good.

Posted by: naturalfake at May 23, 2022 04:28 PM (OK0YZ)

Totally disagree...the GF and I watched it this weekend and found it very good.

Posted by: redchief at May 23, 2022 04:59 PM (kJk/q)

428 I never understood CA legislating electric cars when the last few years they've had rolling blackouts. HTF are you supposed to "fuel" electric cars if you can't even keep the lights on?

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 04:59 PM (DcKNO)

429 I called celebrity women who were screaming about abortion "sluts." maybe I deserved it. But truth is truth.

I also pointed out to another commenter that there was a simple way to avoid pregnancy that didn't involve infanticide.

I wonder if they are just convinced that women are too animalistic to control their sexual urges.

Posted by: Diesel Jones, Biologist at May 23, 2022 05:00 PM (Vu7A1)

430 The Hot Spot was peak Jennifer Connelly peaks.

Posted by: Rusty Nail at May 23, 2022 05:00 PM (E775d)

431 Mission Impossible was cool because it was a team. The Mission Impossible team. Martin Landau was the man of 1,000 faces, Greg Morris was the tech engineer, etc. This is just Jason Bourne/Bond clone.

Posted by: Pointless griping commenter at May 23, 2022 05:00 PM (vN+oL)

432 This is how bloody Revolutions start.

Nah, I'm sure Los Angeles will be perfectly peaceful if it loses power for 48 hours.

Posted by: California! at May 23, 2022 05:00 PM (I2/tG)

433 379
I mean, she looks like that in a good way.

Posted by: Dr. Claw at May 23, 2022 05:00 PM (2OL6m)

434 Jennifer Connelly boobs were spectacular in Inventing The Abbotts.
Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 04:44 PM (W6qhI)


You're welcome.
https://www.boobpedia.com/boobs/Jennifer_Connelly

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at May 23, 2022 05:00 PM (VwHCD)

435 Critical Drinker really liked The Northman too.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 23, 2022 05:01 PM (DcKNO)

436 Hadrian, Thank you for sharing those great photos of Her Majesty and pups.

Posted by: Mrs. JTB at May 23, 2022 05:01 PM (7EjX1)

437 She can detect her prey even if straight to the side.
Posted by: G'rump
----------

I could do that, no problem.

Posted by: Jack Elam at May 23, 2022 05:01 PM (dx9uU)

438 A giraffe is about 1/350th of an asteroid tall.

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 05:01 PM (hfvc1)

439 Is a giraffe any sillier than using football fields? Who chose football fields?

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 05:02 PM (hfvc1)

440 https://www.boobpedia.com/boobs/Jennifer_Connelly

I did not know there was a boobpedia. But it makes sense that there is one.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 23, 2022 05:02 PM (ppBhU)

441 I guess a football field is at least constant. Before some clever bastard calls me out.

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 05:02 PM (hfvc1)

442
You're welcome.
https://www.boobpedia.com/boobs/Jennifer_Connelly
Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at May 23, 2022 05:00 PM (VwHCD)



You're a great American.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden at May 23, 2022 05:02 PM (Zz0t1)

443
The problem with Blunt's character in Sicario was the suspension of disbelief. She's the ultimate "ham & egger," shocked (shocked, I tell you!) to find that the Pentagon, CIA, and her own FBI bosses are crooked.

There isn't a single soul in DoJ who doesn't know he or she works for a crime gang. It's ridiculous.

Posted by: @TheRealWilliamHayes at May 23, 2022 05:03 PM (96UI6)

444 Again whomever gave you the definition is wrong. "faffing about" can refer to any frivolous waste of time, not just being ineffective at a task.

I gave you the link. Take it up with them.

As an aside, this may just be the most AOSHQ argument ever.
Posted by: Archimedes


I will point out the self-referentiality of the whole discussion, to improve the AOSHQness of it.

Posted by: mikeski at May 23, 2022 05:03 PM (P1f+c)

445 373 Is it me or is this the second time they used Giraffes as a metering device??

you know who else used giraffes as a metering device?

Posted by: the carburetor from daktari at May 23, 2022 05:03 PM (oY6Yp)

446 Is a giraffe any sillier than using football fields? Who chose football fields?
Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 05:02 PM (hfvc1)

a football field has a definite length.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 23, 2022 05:03 PM (43LzH)

447 397 That's only 233.33 Giraffe and a halfs.

You're using metric giraffes. We use Imperial giraffes around here.

Okay, how many bushels to a giraffe?
Also can we use dik-diks to measure small giraffes?

Posted by: Ciampino at May 23, 2022 05:03 PM (qfLjt)

448 I thought that Connelly of Career Opportunities was a staple here

https://bityl.co/CL06

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 05:03 PM (fvaUx)

449 I didn't know Jennifer Connelly was Jewish. I also didn't know she was born in the Catskills so she's really really Jewish.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 05:04 PM (jNAzB)

450 here's some head cannon to help you work through this: "Jim Phelps" is just a workname assigned to people in the IMF. the "Jim Phelps" of M:I 1996 is not the Jim Phelps of the 60s/70s series. I don't know if the ages would work anyway.
Posted by: ace at May 23, 2022 04:20 PM (AkbRF)

So, you are doing the 007 head fake. I'll allow it.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at May 23, 2022 05:04 PM (3NKiY)

451 The weather channel can get fucked with a 2 giraffe tall flaming pineapple.
Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 23, 2022


***
Let's be sure to save Jen Carfagno and whoever that busty lady was.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 05:05 PM (txdEq)

452 NOOD lum.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden at May 23, 2022 05:05 PM (Zz0t1)

453 Because only the no noodin' bastages are there currently.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden at May 23, 2022 05:05 PM (Zz0t1)

454 Del Toros character in Sicario killed that a-holes kids because they threw his daughter in a barrel of acid alive.

Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 05:05 PM (W6qhI)

455 Also can we use dik-diks to measure small giraffes?
Posted by: Ciampino at May 23, 2022 05:03 PM

No, that's how monkeypox spreads.

Posted by: Rusty Nail at May 23, 2022 05:05 PM (E775d)

456 Nina the Jank.

Speeking of Janks. Isn't there a scientific term of Jansky.

So we can have Mili-Kohns and Janskys.

Posted by: WisRich at May 23, 2022 05:06 PM (G0vdT)

457 Berserker was a great American even before he posted boobpedia.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 23, 2022 05:06 PM (4WIyI)

458 How about The Hot Spot with Jennifer Connelly?

You actually SEE her actual BOOBS

Posted by: JoeF. at May 23, 2022 05:06 PM (mR6Gs)

459 280 I have completed my scientific analysis of the common house spider on a truck windshield. My observations show it is capable of holding on up to a speed of 44 mph.
Observations suggest higher speeds are possible if not trying to reposition so the wind wasn't blowing up its ass.
Posted by: Diogenes at May 23, 2022 04:36 PM (kXi5T)
I made a scientific discovery last week. We now have lovebugs in ETEX. Yes, those filthy degenerate insects will be destroying paint and windshields here and not just on the Gulf Coast and entire state of Florida. Bastids.

Posted by: Eromero at May 23, 2022 05:06 PM (0OP+5)

460 Fen I really like Ann Taylor-Joy, she is exotic looking

Posted by: Skip at May 23, 2022 05:06 PM (2JoB8)

461 A giraffe is about 1/350th of an asteroid tall.

Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 05:01 PM (hfvc1)

That clears things up. lol

Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 05:06 PM (SH2Zi)

462 Del Toros character in Sicario killed that a-holes kids because they threw his daughter in a barrel of acid alive.
Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 05:05 PM (W6qhI)

Loved how he killed the kids first so he had to see it.

Posted by: JoeF. at May 23, 2022 05:07 PM (mR6Gs)

463 Black 47> The Northman

Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 05:07 PM (W6qhI)

464 David Warner was in The League of Gentleman's Apocalypse with Bernard Hill, who was in The Lord of the Rings with Christopher Lee.
Posted by: BourbonChicken

He was also in a really bad Quest of the Delta Knights, which got the MST3K treatment but good. Also, a rabid bat movie with Lou Diamond Phillips that I kinda like

Posted by: Blutarski, Gradually then Suddenly at May 23, 2022 05:07 PM (20SKS)

465 Why do they show FULL trailers, loaded with scenes and action----but the movie ain't going to be out for another YEAR?
I'm not talking about teaser trailers

Posted by: JoeF. at May 23, 2022 05:08 PM (mR6Gs)

466 other than that imbecile dick married to Huma.
Posted by: Ciampino
------

How quickly we forget political operatives: Huma Abedin spotted meeting with former Gov. Cuomo aide Melissa DeRosa https://tinyurl.com/22thpfvk

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at May 23, 2022 05:09 PM (LUJEW)

467 Del Toros character in Sicario killed that a-holes kids because they threw his daughter in a barrel of acid alive.
Posted by: JROD at May 23, 2022 05:05 PM (W6qhI)

I draw the line at killing innocent kids for revenge. That's just me.

Posted by: Anti doesn't matter at May 23, 2022 05:09 PM (jNAzB)

468 Fen I really like Ann Taylor-Joy, she is exotic looking
Posted by: Skip at May 23, 2022


***
When I said she looked like the kind of elf that would devour lost travelers, I didn't mean she wasn't attractive and exotic. Hey, all relationships have problems . . .

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 05:10 PM (txdEq)

469 >>> 366 WTF?

On the fake weather website "accuweather" right now:

"Asteroid the size of 350 giraffes to fly past Earth this week"

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at May 23, 2022 04:48 PM (SfHsb)

You were expecting a different animal of measurement?
Posted by: Comrade flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at May 23, 2022 04:50 PM (SH2Zi)

Maybe boulders? How many boulders would fit in this asteroid?

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at May 23, 2022 05:10 PM (llON8)

470 >>> 375 Asteroid the size of 350 giraffes


Is that 350 side by side? End to end? Or smished into a giraffe paste of some kind?
Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 04:51 PM (fvaUx)

Assume a spherical giraffe...

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at May 23, 2022 05:11 PM (llON8)

471 Lol. This Fauci meme is perfect

https://tinyurl.com/mswcb7fy

Posted by: redridinghood at May 23, 2022 05:11 PM (NpAcC)

472 Noodus bidenii

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at May 23, 2022 05:13 PM (txdEq)

473 Loved how he killed the kids first so he had to see it.
Posted by: JoeF. at May 23, 2022 05:07 PM (mR6Gs)



Bad Guy realizes he's dead no matter what: "Not in front of the family."

Del Toro shoots family: "Okay."

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at May 23, 2022 05:13 PM (fvaUx)

474 Is a giraffe any sillier than using football fields? Who chose football fields?
Posted by: ... at May 23, 2022 05:02 PM (hfvc1)

a football field has a definite length.
Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 23, 2022 05:03 PM (43LzH)

Not in Canada.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 23, 2022 05:15 PM (eoQWY)

475 "Surprised by Anna Taylor-Joy"
-C.S. Lewis

Posted by: Chuck Martel at May 23, 2022 05:22 PM (fs1hN)

476 "Some may appreciate this kind of non-prettified, non-Hollywooded-up look at the brutal reality of life in 895 A.D., when a moose bit my sister."

Lol, wtf.

This is why I come here.

Posted by: wodun at May 23, 2022 06:08 PM (lFga6)

477 Ward Carroll, a retired USN aviator and YouTuber, gave "TOPGUN Maverick" a thumbs up. So I might go see it.

Posted by: butch at May 23, 2022 06:18 PM (cHvOo)

478 Yeah, I watched "The Northman" this weekend and felt the same way about it. It's not a fun or exciting movie, but it is very interesting.

If you've seen Eggers' other two moves (The Witch and The Lighthouse), this is pretty much in the same vein. The Witch in particular was very similar, with the way it inserts fantastical elements into an otherwise-realistic story. Basically, he tries to tell a historically accurate story with the twist that the religious beliefs of the characters are shown to be absolutely true (Puritan fanaticism in The Witch, Norse mythology in The Northman).

Like I said, interesting, though not necessarily entertaining.

Posted by: Ex-liberal at May 23, 2022 06:44 PM (XdH1u)

479 This must be a common norse story, it makes up a large part of the story in Assassin's Creed: Valhalla where King Harold steals some of your fire by exiling the son of the man who murdered your father. You still get to kill him, just... yeah, it takes away some of the bite.

Posted by: Darel F at May 24, 2022 11:46 AM (CGDpf)

480 Gоod pⲟst. I lеarn ѕomethіng totallу new and challenging on websites I stumbleupon on a daily basis.
It wiⅼl alwayѕ be exciting to read through content from other aᥙthors and use something from other web sites.

Posted by: unlock at June 18, 2022 12:26 PM (oo4MA)

(Jump to top of page)






Processing 0.05, elapsed 0.0616 seconds.
15 queries taking 0.0234 seconds, 489 records returned.
Page size 240 kb.
Powered by Minx 0.8 beta.



MuNuvians
MeeNuvians
Polls! Polls! Polls!

Real Clear Politics
Gallup
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat