"Fictosexual" Man Marries a Hologram Bride, But Now Finds It More Difficult to "Bond" With His Fantasy Phanto-Wife

If these two kids can't make it...

If you can believe, this guy's a self-defined otaku -- defined as, Google tells me, "a young person who is obsessed with computers or particular aspects of popular culture to the detriment of their social skills."

otakugroom.jpg

The second definition is, "the guy who played the synth gong in the Revenge of the Nerds Lambda Lambda Lambda band."

Don't laugh too hard. America is basically ten years behind Japan sexually.


She's not real -- but his feelings are.

A "fictosexual" man who wed a fictional, computer-synthesized pop singer four years ago said he's now unable to communicate with his wife, but is still in love with her.

Akihiko Kondo, 38, was dating Hatsune Miku -- depicted in pop culture as a 16-year-old with turquoise hair -- for a decade before they had an unofficial wedding ceremony in 2018. Kondo -- one of many who identifies as "fictosexual," or someone who is sexually attracted to fictional characters -- spent 2 million yen, or about $17,300, on the nuptials, but his family did not attend.

The family disapproved of Miku because she came from a poor family of fisherfolk. And also, because she does not exist.

Now married for four years, Kondo, 38, said his relationship has hit a roadblock:

Thorazine.

No, really, the hologram software he was using to "interact" with his fake girlfriend is no longer supported. So he can't "talk" to "her" any longer.


"My love for Miku hasn't changed," he told Mainichi, which noted he now carried around a life-size version of Miku.

So it's a classic story of undying love, where now the man carries around the lifeless husk of his beloved, like in that classic love story, what's the one... Psycho.

body.jpg

Kondo is far from the only person in the world in a relationship with a character. Thousands of "fictosexual" people in Japan have begun similar unofficial relationships with a variety of fictitious figures, the Mirror reported.


...

Kondo first became familiar with Miku in 2008 after bullying at work caused him to become depressed. Despite finding it difficult to accept his feelings at first, he knew humans weren't right for him after being met with rejection by others.

Does Kondo blog anonymously for Hot Air, by any chance?

Again, this is just America in 2032.


For fifteen years I've been a luddite and have thrown cold water on claims by idiots at Reason and all the geek tech sites who were constantly claiming that the internet and "virtual communication" and "virtual experiences" and and remote-control "virtual sex" -- "teledildonics" -- were going to improve the human condition.

Really? We're going to overwrite one million (or more) years of human coding to accommodate ourselves to a new "virtual" reality? And that's going to make us happy fulfilled?

And that's not going to deform us or retard us or reduce us in any way?

The "science-based" people who never shut up about Believing in Evolution think that suddenly evolution is going to work virtually overnight and we're going to evolve to adapt to being a co-species with machines in a decade?

Okay, whatever, smart guys. You went to E3 in 2011 so I guess you know everything now.

prisonoflight.jpg
"And I shall keep you trapped in a prison of light forever,
my little hologram masturbation sprite."


75 someone blew the margins today
---------------------------
And she caught Covid.
Posted by: andycanuck


Posted by: Ace at 04:28 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of page)

1 someone blew the margins today

Posted by: mallfly the Peach of Hoboken at April 26, 2022 04:29 PM (Ynyl9)

2 also first. I'll get the others

Posted by: mallfly the Peach of Hoboken at April 26, 2022 04:30 PM (Ynyl9)

3 "Holy fucking shit..."
-The Margins

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:30 PM (LvTSG)

4 All the money he thought he would be saving he spent on lube.

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 04:30 PM (M3Eqk)

5 It wasn't me!

*cackles*

Posted by: Kamala Harris at April 26, 2022 04:30 PM (llON8)

6 4 Years Ago, this guy still wasn't half as blown as the margins.

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 04:31 PM (M3Eqk)

7 MARGINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at April 26, 2022 04:31 PM (4q/mG)

8 1 someone blew the margins today
Posted by: mallfly the Peach of Hoboken at April 26, 2022 04:29 PM (Ynyl9)

That someone being ace.

Posted by: Red Turban Someguy - The Republic is already dead! at April 26, 2022 04:31 PM (b2nrj)

9 Kamala, stay away from those margins.

Posted by: Roy at April 26, 2022 04:31 PM (Ti+Tv)

10 I'm sure that's Dr Krueger's girlfriend.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 26, 2022 04:31 PM (jEmCU)

11 I wonder if he's related to Marie Kondo.

Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, CNN Superfan at April 26, 2022 04:31 PM (PiwSw)

12 *Smokes all the cigarettes*

Posted by: Margins at April 26, 2022 04:31 PM (F9322)

13 I had a foolish comment.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:31 PM (LvTSG)

14 Boy, WWII really broke these guys, didn't it.

Posted by: Admiral James Greer at April 26, 2022 04:32 PM (ZsR3z)

15 We now return you to your normal margins. Thank you

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at April 26, 2022 04:32 PM (4q/mG)

16 Can you imagine jerking off to a pillow?

*shifty eyes*

uhh me neither.

Posted by: unknown at April 26, 2022 04:32 PM (l5Vae)

17 Damn. Blown already.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 26, 2022 04:32 PM (74/x3)

18 This is healthy.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 04:32 PM (YqDXo)

19 We used to call this Choking the Chicken.

Posted by: Jeff Gillooly at April 26, 2022 04:32 PM (6BTho)

20 Where the "F" come in the alphabet soup victim identity hierarchy?

Posted by: Roy at April 26, 2022 04:32 PM (Ti+Tv)

21 10 I'm sure that's Dr Krueger's girlfriend.
Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 26, 2022 04:31 PM (jEmCU)

Krieger

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:33 PM (II3Gr)

22 14 Boy, WWII really broke these guys, didn't it.
Posted by: Admiral James Greer at April 26, 2022 04:32 PM (ZsR3z)
____________

Nuked too much, or not enough?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 04:33 PM (YqDXo)

23 She looked all fat, but then got real skinny...

Posted by: Inogame at April 26, 2022 04:33 PM (53oGX)

24 Something has to shake loose soon. World war. Mass suicide. Something. Too many oxygen wasters.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 26, 2022 04:33 PM (co19B)

25 Wut!?????

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at April 26, 2022 04:33 PM (bVYXr)

26 "Hey Big Boy, let me grab your light saber..." - Fictobitch

Posted by: Roy at April 26, 2022 04:33 PM (Ti+Tv)

27 I hurt margins today

To see if I still feel

I focus on eye-strain

The only thing that's real

Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 26, 2022 04:33 PM (44ww/)

28 Man, he's so genetically deficient that he's manifestly lucky he got even the Hologram chick to talk to him...

Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 04:33 PM (5iUNf)

29 Boy, WWII really broke these guys, didn't it.
Posted by: Admiral James Greer at April 26, 2022 04:32 PM (ZsR3z)
____________

Nuked too much, or not enough?
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara

Yes.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 26, 2022 04:33 PM (co19B)

30 That chick has big hands.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at April 26, 2022 04:33 PM (Y5qcH)

31 I actually feel really really bad for this guy, and from what I can gather this is increasingly commonplace in Japan. And given the trends we're seeing in dating and marriage in the US, it's probably a preview of our own future.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:34 PM (II3Gr)

32 Formless projections of light lack:
-hair that smells like strawberries
-wicked grins that reach their eyes
-boob-feel goes without saying
-vagina
-legs, if you are a 'ron that swings that way.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 04:34 PM (F/J1O)

33 32 Formless projections of light lack:
-hair that smells like strawberries
-wicked grins that reach their eyes
-boob-feel goes without saying
-vagina
-legs, if you are a 'ron that swings that way.
Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 04:34 PM (F/J1O)

==========

Their sandwiches are usually light on the mustard as well.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (LvTSG)

34 Using a character from 'Archer' as a lifestyle choice is interesting.

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (sAmhv)

35 If I were tech savvy, I would be writing code to get the doll to tell him he sucks every day, and that she wants a divorce.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (5kI0z)

36 I wonder what Pixy Misa would think about this...

Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, CNN Superfan at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (PiwSw)

37 I may be single and may stay single forever, but at least I have my dignity (and sense of reality) intact.

Thanks for the self-esteem boost, Ace.

Posted by: chique l'African Viking Math Queen King of Greenland, the Merciless (don't/stop/believin') at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (cpMW3)

38 34 Using a character from 'Archer' as a lifestyle choice is interesting.
Posted by: Puddleglum at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (sAmhv)

=========

Well, there's Archer himself.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (LvTSG)

39 Fictosexual? Fictitious and Sex are related, aren't they? I was told growing up sex WAS 'fictitious'...

Bring back magazines- at least those don't get 'married' to.

Posted by: Mr Wolf at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (hiYlW)

40 Best part about the relationship is that he has an on/off switch.

Posted by: Roy at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (Ti+Tv)

41 Willowed:

If we could only see Kamala unburdened by chlamydia...

Isn't she like 95% chlamydia now?

I think she'd look like a very stupid used condom without all the chlamydia holding her up.

Posted by: naturalfake at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (5NkmN)

42 18 This is healthy.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 04:32 PM (YqDXo)

Given the likes of the "gals" on Twitter and Tic Toc, it may actually be more healthy long term.

Certainly less chance of being falsely accused in court.

Posted by: Bete at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (F9322)

43 Just got a pre-filled Mail in ballot request for PA from this "non partisan" group.

We all have reason to be discouraged by the character of political dialogue today.
Politics is often cluttered with loose accusations, half-truths and unfounded assertions.
Center for Voter Information is a non-profit, non-partisan partner organization to Voter Participation Center, both founded to provide resources and tools to help voting-eligible citizens register and vote in upcoming elections.
Our Leadership

Tom Lopach
CVI’s President and CEO

He is an experienced leader and veteran strategist who has served as Chief of Staff to a U.S. Senator and the Montana Governor. A Montana native, Tom also served as a senior adviser to the Governor during his presidential campaign.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (bg3iC)

44 39 Fictosexual? Fictitious and Sex are related, aren't they? I was told growing up sex WAS 'fictitious'...

Bring back magazines- at least those don't get 'married' to.
Posted by: Mr Wolf at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (hiYlW)

Dear Penthouse Forum...

Posted by: Roy at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (Ti+Tv)

45 Is he related to Marie Kondo?

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (kKGFY)

46 And you wonder why their population growth is in the negative numbers...

Posted by: gourmand du jour at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (jTmQV)

47 Somebody needs to get some pussy, seriously. When I was stationed in Japan there were hot Japanese women all over the place.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (bVYXr)

48 Given the likes of the "gals" on Twitter and Tic Toc, it may actually be more healthy long term.

Certainly less chance of being falsely accused in court.
Posted by: Bete at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (F9322)

A hologram can't take half your shit, either.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (II3Gr)

49 Geeze man, get a real doll. I mean a real real doll.

Although it's probably easier to clean your junk out of a hologram than a plastic snizz.

Posted by: Max Power at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (k7+BO)

50 Toasters, bicycles, sofas, and longbows all breathe a sigh of relief.

And drop the restraining orders.

Posted by: GnuBreed at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (F0YaR)

51 Mental illness is a bitch.

Posted by: USNtakim deplorable still. at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (0OmEj)

52 It's all fun and games until it gets a virus.

Posted by: torabora at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (Y274z)

53 If only Miku had more chlamydia, then she'd be as real as Kamala Harris,

and as smart. Smarter even.

Posted by: naturalfake at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (5NkmN)

54 For fifteen years I've been a luddite and have thrown cold water on claims by idiots at Reason and all the geek tech sites who were constantly claiming that the internet and remote-control sex -- "teledildonics" -- were going to improve the human condition.
++++
They will, and they are actually a pretty important part of the overall plan for the evolution of the species. You see, when we're all locked in 200 sq. ft. efficiency apartments that we can't leave because venturing out into the Mad Max style hellscape where competing bands of luddites engage in constant combat in their bid to rule the wasteland, all social - and therefore sexual - interaction will occur in the Metaverse because the Metaverse will allow you to pretend that you're not a pod person and that you're a real human who works in an office and socializes with friends at the bar and stuff. The teledildonics will be necessary to provide necessary realism to Metaverse dating - and Metaverse dating is the only kind you'll be able to do because you're a rightless drone living in a pod and surviving on whatever the Amazon drone fleet drops off to you.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (DU+/6)

55 Time to see a shrink, no?

Posted by: chique l'African Viking Math Queen King of Greenland, the Merciless (don't/stop/believin') at April 26, 2022 04:37 PM (cpMW3)

56 Erev Tov

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 26, 2022 04:37 PM (JfrFV)

57 31 I actually feel really really bad for this guy, and from what I can gather this is increasingly commonplace in Japan. And given the trends we're seeing in dating and marriage in the US, it's probably a preview of our own future.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:34 PM (II3Gr)

I don't feel bad for him. If he's not mentally ill, he made his choice, and now he can live with being alone.

He's no different than a cat lady...and no one ever felt bad for cat ladies...

Posted by: Nova local at April 26, 2022 04:37 PM (exHjb)

58 He's so far into the lower end of the gene pool that he probably asks her what she's thinking...

Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 04:37 PM (5iUNf)

59 That can't be her natural hair color...

Posted by: Muldoon at April 26, 2022 04:37 PM (kXYt5)

60 Y'know, Kondo is a decent-looking guy who's well-dressed and clearly has a job because he can afford to build and maintain (until the vendor support ended) his holowaifu. Something tells me he didn't have zero options right out of the gate.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (DU+/6)

61 Tom Lopach
CVI’s President and CEO

He also played Luke Duke.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (74/x3)

62 48 Given the likes of the "gals" on Twitter and Tic Toc, it may actually be more healthy long term.

Certainly less chance of being falsely accused in court.
Posted by: Bete at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (F9322)

A hologram can't take half your shit, either.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (II3Gr)

Not yet. Give it 5 years and marriage to holograms will be legalized, and after that comes the divorce sharks prowling.

Posted by: Bete at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (F9322)

63 I can see a preference for this kind of relationship over any of the screaming leftist shrews I've seen on the internet.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (Qhnrt)

64 This guy was voted "Most Likely To Not Get Any Dates" in his chemical engineering class.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Break The Teachers Unions at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (BnYXG)

65 I bet her fartclam is as smooth as nonexistent warm butter.

Posted by: GnuBreed at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (F0YaR)

66 He's 38? Dude looks 12.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (Y5qcH)

67 >>>I actually feel really really bad for this guy,

i feel bad for him too. I also want to stop celebrating this nonsense and push back against it.

Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (0G13K)

68 Yay! A Nephilim thread!

Posted by: That guy who says Yay, a Nephilim thread! at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (tgEY/)

69 We're going from living 1984 to living the Matrix.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (5kI0z)

70 >>That can't be her natural hair color...


Checks out. Carpet matches the drapes.

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (M3Eqk)

71 #touchgrass
#touchboobies

Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (0G13K)

72 F*ckin' weeb!

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Feed Your Rage Energy Drinks 50% Off at The Outrage Outlet! at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (ZGL/f)

73 I thought the Japanese had developed really advanced sex dolls? This guy too cheap to spring for one?

Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (Qy7kP)

74 69 We're going from living 1984 to living the Matrix.
Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (5kI0z)

=========

I wanna live in Brave New World.

At least the drugs are good.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (LvTSG)

75 someone blew the margins today
---------------------------
And she caught Covid.

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (UHVv4)

76 Not yet. Give it 5 years and marriage to holograms will be legalized, and after that comes the divorce sharks prowling.
Posted by: Bete at April 26, 2022 04:38 PM (F9322)

The "Modern Feminist Woman AI Package" will become required operating software.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (II3Gr)

77 >>i feel bad for him too. I also want to stop celebrating this nonsense and push back against it.


An experience he'll never have.

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (M3Eqk)

78 I bet she doesn't talk too much and shuts up when he tells her too.

Doll: +1
Actual women: - 1000

Posted by: chique l'African Viking Math Queen King of Greenland, the Merciless (don't/stop/believin') at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (cpMW3)

79 This is like Retro Ace. Classic stuff.

Posted by: ... at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (4qYQG)

80 If you do not celebrate this you are killing fictosexuals. Literally.

Posted by: Ripley at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (MxEKc)

81 It always sucks when customer support ends for your wife.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (5kI0z)

82 >>> 75 someone blew the margins today
---------------------------
And she caught Covid.
Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (UHVv4)

It was NOT me! It was that short hairy guy!

Posted by: Kamala Harris at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (llON8)

83 No way that's getting preggers.

Posted by: torabora at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (Y274z)

84 Formless projections of light lack:
-hair that smells like strawberries
-wicked grins that reach their eyes
-boob-feel goes without saying
-vagina
-legs, if you are a 'ron that swings that way.
Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop

Their sandwiches are usually light on the mustard as well.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison

Formless projections of light don't bust ass caps all over the house.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (co19B)

85 Well, be sure to get the NFT for your holowife, otherwise she will be hooring around with all the guys on insta.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (bg3iC)

86 hiya

Posted by: JT at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (arJlL)

87 Those nukes really did a number on the Japs.

First, Godzilla. Then booze and porn in vending machines.

And now this.

Bushido is dead.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (/1l9x)

88 Hologram >> Amber Heard

BTW, according to the Daily Mail, clinical psychologists are testifying at the Depp-Heard trial that Amber has not one, but two personality disorders. Borderline Personality Disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder.

I'd LOL'd at the last one.

Posted by: publius, Rascally Rapscallion (Mzdiz) at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (Mzdiz)

89 38 34 Using a character from 'Archer' as a lifestyle choice is interesting.
Posted by: Puddleglum at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM (sAmhv)


Well, there's Archer himself.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison



And yet this guy picked Krieger. Pam would have made more sense. Sort of.

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (sAmhv)

90 Can she make a sammich?

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (kKGFY)

91 Thats so sad. I have heard of this happening all over Japan. I remember when people were talking about Japan invading the US via imported products. Now its China. They won't be marrying a hologram.

Posted by: Megthered at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (S1zYz)

92 Since we're here - why do anime characters all have the exact same face and gigantic eyes?

Posted by: spindrift at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (h5TKJ)

93 Yup he looks just how he looked in my head. Nutz

Posted by: SOMEASSHOLESTOLEMYPEN at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (ytSiK)

94 Chique checking in with the snark.


Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (M3Eqk)

95 65 I bet her fartclam is as smooth as nonexistent warm butter


100 % cotton

the fabric of our lives

Posted by: Busted Can of Biscuits at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (2cfUo)

96

Chick doesn't do the dishes.

Posted by: Dr.Rev. Senator Your Highness E Buzz Miller, Esq PhD MA MS at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (XnbJC)

97 >The "Modern Feminist Woman AI Package" will become required operating software.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (II3Gr)

And if your self-esteem is too high, the Karen module is an easy over the air update.

Posted by: Heavy Meta at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (NgqoH)

98 someone blew the margins today

oh, boy...

Posted by: t-bird at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (Mgbo4)

99 So can I marry Jessica Rabbit? Because...hubba-hubba!

Posted by: Shooter McGavin at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (By+J7)

100 It's the worst thing when your hologram starts telling you to lay off the second bowl of rice.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Break The Teachers Unions at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (BnYXG)

101 Well, be sure to get the NFT for your holowife, otherwise she will be hooring around with all the guys on insta.
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (bg3iC)
++++
Well, CAT, you did it. This is probably a viable - if niche - industry. Congratulations. Patent it and hire a coder to pump out a shitty blockchain to enable it, stat.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (DU+/6)

102 36 I wonder what Pixy Misa would think about this...
Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, CNN Superfan at April 26, 2022 04:35 PM

I just assumed that WAS Pixy.

Posted by: Moron Analyst at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (JCZqz)

103 Since the hologram isn't 13 (age of consent in Japan) isn't this pedo schiff?

Posted by: torabora at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (Y274z)

104 81 It always sucks when customer support ends for your wife.
Posted by: Thomas Paine


We have been trying to reach you about your wife's extended warranty.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (co19B)

105 Dude needs to be driven deep into the forest, handed an axe, a lighter, and a canteen, and told that someone will be back in seven days to either congratulate him or recover the corpse.

Posted by: PabloD at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (zqwN3)

106 I wanna live in Brave New World.

At least the drugs are good.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (LvTSG)

Our 21st century dystopia sucks. There's no magic, no cyberware, no dragons, no easy drugs or sex. We just get the panopticon, corporatism, and economic decay. Fuck you, William Gibson!

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (II3Gr)

107 Look, I'm married. I've never had cat in my life until 3 years ago when my daughter wanted one. Then my son wanted one. And now the next-door neighbors outdoor cat lives on my front porch.... But I'm not a cat lady since none of these cats are technically mine. So, I'm not a cat lady!!!!

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (UUBmN)

108 "Bond, Frames Bond."

Posted by: ShainS -- #SaveOurChildren at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (oN+s2)

109 Katie Herzog, an amusing Seattle-area writer who was driven from Seattle's alt-weekly because she's a lesbian who believes that only women are women, has the definitive Left-wing response to Musk's takeover of Twitter:

If Elon Musk buys twitter I’m moving to Canada


Posted by: The ARC of History! at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (I2/tG)

110 Four years? Big whoop de do! I dated Señe;or Wences from 1969 to 1974.

Posted by: Muldoon at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (kXYt5)

111 >>> 88 Hologram >> Amber Heard

BTW, according to the Daily Mail, clinical psychologists are testifying at the Depp-Heard trial that Amber has not one, but two personality disorders. Borderline Personality Disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder.

I'd LOL'd at the last one.
Posted by: publius, Rascally Rapscallion (Mzdiz) at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (Mzdiz)

Isn't that pretty much everyone in Hollywood?

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (llON8)

112 This is actually sad.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (jEmCU)

113 The "Modern Feminist Woman AI Package" will become required operating software.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (II3Gr)
++++
Count on it. I'm dead serious. Women will insist that AI-driven sex toys be made unbearable.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (DU+/6)

114 89 And yet this guy picked Krieger. Pam would have made more sense. Sort of.
Posted by: Puddleglum at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (sAmhv)

=========

Cocaine Pam or Country Star Cheryl

The answer is "and".

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (LvTSG)

115 Señor

Posted by: Muldoon at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (kXYt5)

116 Pixyosexuality??

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (UHVv4)

117 I went to E3 in 2005.

Posted by: Serious Cat at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (700n7)

118 It's the worst thing when your hologram starts telling you to lay off the second bowl of rice.
Posted by: Huck Follywood, Break The Teachers Unions at April 26, 2022 04:41 PM (BnYXG)

Wait until he gets to the Hartcourt Fenton Mudd level of hologram torture...

Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (5iUNf)

119 Well, CAT, you did it. This is probably a viable - if niche - industry. Congratulations. Patent it and hire a coder to pump out a shitty blockchain to enable it, stat.
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!)

I'll ask pixy on Sat. I know how much he loves the blockchain.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (bg3iC)

120 >>>The "Modern Feminist Woman AI Package" will become required operating software.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (II3Gr)

You misspelled "biracial transexual racial justice muscle bear top driver"

Posted by: Max Power at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (k7+BO)

121 Who paid for the wedding?

Posted by: ... at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (xnYBL)

122 The perennial question: nuked too much, or not enough?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (Gwzne)

123 Now its China. They won't be marrying a hologram.

Posted by: Megthered


They won't be marrying anybody. They won't find 200 million women anywhere.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (5kI0z)

124 >>>Dude needs to be driven deep into the forest, handed an axe, a lighter, and a canteen, and told that someone will be back in seven days to either congratulate him or recover the corpse.
Posted by: PabloD

lol, I wish someone would do that for me (but please actually check in after three days)

Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (0G13K)

125 106 Our 21st century dystopia sucks. There's no magic, no cyberware, no dragons, no easy drugs or sex. We just get the panopticon, corporatism, and economic decay. Fuck you, William Gibson!
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (II3Gr)

=========

You can always play Cyberpunk 2077 and act like our dystopia is cool.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (LvTSG)

126 Did anyone think to ask how their kids feel about the breakdown of communication between Mommy and Daddy?

Posted by: NeverBiden at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (eIGHH)

127 Archer's Russian cyborg girlfriend was hotter.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (jEmCU)

128 Have you tried turning her off and then turning her on again?

Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (Qy7kP)

129 Harcourt Fenton Mudd! You good for nothing thing! Have you been at the HQ all day?!

Posted by: Stella at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (UHVv4)

130 They won't be marrying anybody. They won't find 200 million women anywhere.
Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (5kI0z)

Mostly because they ended up in the medical waste bin.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (II3Gr)

131 And all this time I thought it was just a running gag on Archer, with Dr. Krieger and his holographic "bride."

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (YIVH2)

132 What does Kondo do for work, real estate?

Posted by: wth at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (v0R5T)

133 You know, the worst thing about all of this is that "AI-driven sex toys" are things that, while not mainstream, do exist and that this combination words has discernible meaning.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (DU+/6)

134 >>I wish someone would do that for me (but please actually check in after three days)


No way you would make it 3 days. None.

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (M3Eqk)

135 Pixy Mesa hardest hit.

Posted by: ShainS -- #SaveOurChildren at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (oN+s2)

136 75 someone blew the margins today
---------------------------
And she caught Covid.
Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM

Laugh it up...the margins promised me a position on the AoS Board of Directors AND a free platinum membership. We'll see who's laughing in a month or so...

Posted by: Kamala "Anything Goes" Harris at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (JCZqz)

137 No, sir. I said reboot her.

Posted by: 24/7 support at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (UHVv4)

138 Have you tried turning her off and then turning her on again?

Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (Qy7kP)

I'll bet he has.

Posted by: Shooter McGavin at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (By+J7)

139 31 I actually feel really really bad for this guy, and from what I can gather this is increasingly commonplace in Japan. And given the trends we're seeing in dating and marriage in the US, it's probably a preview of our own future.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:34 PM (II3Gr)

You said this better than I. Sadly I agree completely with your assessment.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (MySN1)

140 105 Dude needs to be driven deep into the forest, handed an axe, a lighter, and a canteen, and told that someone will be back in seven days to either congratulate him or recover the corpse.
Posted by: PabloD



I've read about a forest that's below Mt Fuji and people go and commit suicide. I suggest not taking this guy there.

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (sAmhv)

141 >>> 107 Look, I'm married. I've never had cat in my life until 3 years ago when my daughter wanted one. Then my son wanted one. And now the next-door neighbors outdoor cat lives on my front porch.... But I'm not a cat lady since none of these cats are technically mine. So, I'm not a cat lady!!!!
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (UUBmN)

You should get a cat. Your own cat. ;P

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (llON8)

142 Our 21st century dystopia sucks. There's no magic, no cyberware, no dragons, no easy drugs or sex. We just get the panopticon, corporatism, and economic decay. Fuck you, William Gibson!
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (II3Gr)
++++
Yeah. Our dystopian cyberpunk present is nothing like the dystopian cyberpunk future that was promised.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (DU+/6)

143 No, really, the hologram software he was using to "interact" with his fake girlfriend is no longer supported.

-------------
Nah, here's what happened. The hologram software outfit was hacked. All of the "objects" in relationships with holo software users were re-programmed to behave like Stella, wife of 23rd Century trader Harcourt Fenton Mudd. Bad times for Akihiko.

Posted by: Gref at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (AMIL/)

144 Those nukes really did a number on the Japs.

First, Godzilla. Then booze and porn in vending machines.

And now this.

Bushido is dead.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM


Don't forget grade school girls used panties in a can in vending machines. They were called "Canties", and yes they were real.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (bVYXr)

145 >>Have you tried turning her off and then turning her on again?


You have to Jiggle it.

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (M3Eqk)

146 >>>No way you would make it 3 days. None.


absolutely i would. Not only do I routinely fast for weeks at a time but I've seen all nine seasons of Dual Survivor. (joke but I do know to look for water and not food)

Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (0G13K)

147
Ojection! Hearsay!

Posted by: Amber Heard's lawyer at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (do2wA)

148 107 Look, I'm married. I've never had cat in my life until 3 years ago when my daughter wanted one. Then my son wanted one. And now the next-door neighbors outdoor cat lives on my front porch.... But I'm not a cat lady since none of these cats are technically mine. So, I'm not a cat lady!!!!
Posted by: lin-duh



Meow?

Posted by: Art Thread Kittuh at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (sAmhv)

149 128 Have you tried turning her off and then turning her on again?
Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (Qy7kP)

Once turned off, it's damned hard to get them turned on again.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (II3Gr)

150 Dude needs to be driven deep into the forest, handed an axe, a lighter, and a canteen, and told that someone will be back in seven days to either congratulate him or recover the corpse.
Posted by: PabloD

Japan does have a Suicide Forest. It's full of abandoned cars, empty tents, and dead folks.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (Y5qcH)

151 78 I bet she doesn't talk too much and shuts up when he tells her too.

Doll: +1
Actual women: - 1000
Posted by: chique l'African Viking Math Queen King of Greenland, the Merciless (don't/stop/believin') at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (cpMW3)

But can she make a sandwich? No, no she cannot.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Feed Your Rage Energy Drinks 50% Off at The Outrage Outlet! at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (ZGL/f)

152 146 >>>No way you would make it 3 days. None.


absolutely i would. Not only do I routinely fast for weeks at a time but I've seen all nine seasons of Dual Survivor. (joke but I do know to look for water and not food)
Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (0G13K)

=========

I've seen like half of Is it Cake?, so I'm pretty sure I could identify objects in the wild that are masquerading as cake.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (LvTSG)

153 So, she's "16" and he "dated" her for years before they married. So is she in her 20's now or forever 16??? because if it's the later then he needs to be in jail...just saying.

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (UUBmN)

154 Well it's one in the eye for the "I don't need no man" crowd.

Posted by: ... at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (dscaa)

155 Has to be a hoax ...c'mon man, she is all blue ...and digital...

Posted by: runner at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (3WWC/)

156 Are there a more signifigant number of weird young men with bizarre relationships In Japan than we currently see in the US, or is because they combine a fascination with computer things/graphics with inability to have a relationship with a real person?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (fF2aM)

157 ARCHER DID IT!!!

Posted by: Guy who can finally not say "Simpsons did it"! at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (+tgR5)

158 I guess if she starts to bitch, you can turn her off.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (74/x3)

159 Barak Lurie
Rise Of The Sex Machines: How culture and technology are changing relationships forever—and who will resist

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenko Solutions at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (J/+fm)

160 I like the idea of driving the guy out into the forest for 7 days, but he also probably could learn a life lesson by being forced into a public area with no phone/electronics for 7 hours...

Posted by: Nova local at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (exHjb)

161 We have been trying to reach you about your wife's extended warranty.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (co19B)


Great. The collision and liability insurance was already killing me.

Posted by: GnuBreed at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (F0YaR)

162 absolutely i would. Not only do I routinely fast for weeks at a time but I've seen all nine seasons of Dual Survivor. (joke but I do know to look for water and not food)
Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (0G13K)

I'm thankful you didn't say "Naked and Alone"

Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (5iUNf)

163 >>absolutely i would. Not only do I routinely fast for weeks at a time but I've seen all nine seasons of Dual Survivor. (joke but I do know to look for water and not food)


Sure. But there aren't any faucets or refigerators.

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (M3Eqk)

164 fictosexual, furries, LGBTBBQXYZEIEIO+pedos . . . .

It's a cornucopia of weirdos. Apologies to the legit gay people who just want the rest to STFU, STFD, and to be left the F alone.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (SH2Zi)

165 His doll probably runs on Vista.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (5kI0z)

166 I've read about a forest that's below Mt Fuji and people go and commit suicide. I suggest not taking this guy there.
Posted by: Puddleglum at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (sAmhv)

Aokigahara. It's creepy AF.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (II3Gr)

167 Helena,
I would like a rag doll but they are expensive!

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (UUBmN)

168 The hologram is +1

Posted by: San Franpsycho at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (EZebt)

169 "If Elon Musk buys twitter I’m moving to Canada
Posted by: The ARC of History!"


Somebody should tell her Musk is planning on buying Canada next.

Posted by: Ripley at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (MxEKc)

170 Another good thing is that she'll tell the sex was perfect every time and that she always says, "You so BIG"!

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (Qhnrt)

171 >>> 105 Dude needs to be driven deep into the forest, handed an axe, a lighter, and a canteen, and told that someone will be back in seven days to either congratulate him or recover the corpse.
Posted by: PabloD at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (zqwN3)

Can we do this to all the idiots shrieking about Elon Musk buying Twatter?

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (llON8)

172 Doll: +1
Actual women: - 1000
Posted by: chique l'African Viking Math Queen King of Greenland, the Merciless (don't/stop/believin') at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (cpMW3)

But can she make a sandwich? No, no she cannot.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Feed Your Rage Energy Drinks 50% Off at The Outrage Outlet! at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (ZGL/f)

Boobehs. Game, set, match, actual women.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (SH2Zi)

173 166 I've read about a forest that's below Mt Fuji and people go and commit suicide. I suggest not taking this guy there.
Posted by: Puddleglum at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (sAmhv)

Aokigahara. It's creepy AF.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (II3Gr)

========

If that's where you took your wife on your honeymoon...

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (LvTSG)

174 121 Who paid for the wedding?
Posted by: ... at April 26, 2022 04:43 PM (xnYBL)

Tokyo Board of Water and Light.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Feed Your Rage Energy Drinks 50% Off at The Outrage Outlet! at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (ZGL/f)

175 Say the word, ace, just say the word. Just don't freak out when the van pulls up next to you on the street.

I hope I grab the right guy... I don't want to get sued by some rando who looks like an Ewok. Gotta double check for the crocs and messenger bag.

Posted by: PabloD at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (zqwN3)

176 Good to know that at least the Japs are even crazier than us. I take some comfort in that.

Posted by: Shooter McGavin at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (By+J7)

177 112 This is actually sad.
Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM

Wait until Google forces me to divorce him, take half his money, and donate it to the 2024 Dem war chest!

Posted by: Hatsune Miku at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (JCZqz)

178 Look, I'm married. I've never had cat in my life until 3 years ago when my daughter wanted one. Then my son wanted one. And now the next-door neighbors outdoor cat lives on my front porch.... But I'm not a cat lady since none of these cats are technically mine. So, I'm not a cat lady!!!!
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (UUBmN)


*pats lin-duh's hand*

Yes, of course, dear.

I'll just let myself out.

*hands lin-duh a business card for Cat Ladies Anonymous*

Posted by: naturalfake at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (5NkmN)

179 So, she's "16" and he "dated" her for years before they married. So is she in her 20's now or forever 16??? because if it's the later then he needs to be in jail...just saying.
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (UUBmN)
++++
Why? She isn't real. He's a weirdo with incomprehensible lifestyle choices, but the "victim" in this case is literally a fictional character rendered in software and he is harming no one.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (DU+/6)

180 I did a 3 day solo as part of an Outward Bound type on the NH/Canada border in January. Spent most of the 3 days sitting in a fire pit I dug win the snow playing cards I made with a notepad.

Posted by: JackStraw at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (ZLI7S)

181 If you do not celebrate this you are killing fictosexuals. Literally.
Posted by: Ripley at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM

Literally genocide. I'm literally shaking right now.

Posted by: chique l'African Viking Math Queen King of Greenland, the Merciless (don't/stop/believin') at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (cpMW3)

182 I don't want to be that guy....but I cucked his wife.

Posted by: Landofskybluewater at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (+tgR5)

183 Touching the skin of a real woman beats pixels. I'm going by memory.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 26, 2022 04:49 PM (jEmCU)

184 Those nukes really did a number on the Japs.

Maybe it's more like WWI and II's effect on Yurp. If huge numbers of a nation's fighting men get killed, what you are left with is less virile . . . .

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at April 26, 2022 04:49 PM (ppBhU)

185 182 I don't want to be that guy....but I cucked his wife.
Posted by: Landofskybluewater at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (+tgR5)

==========

So...you had sex with the guy?

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:49 PM (LvTSG)

186 He should've paid for the upgrade.

Or at least multi-sourced vendors.

Posted by: DaveA at April 26, 2022 04:49 PM (FhXTo)

187 Don't forget grade school girls used panties in a can in vending machines. They were called "Canties", and yes they were real.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (bVYXr)

Were they spectacular?

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 04:49 PM (SH2Zi)

188 "Hold me closer, tiny dancer..."


Posted by: Toad-O at April 26, 2022 04:49 PM (cct0t)

189 To be fair, this should be on Pixy Misa's thread. He writes about Japanese animation frequently. Like, a lot.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at April 26, 2022 04:49 PM (EZebt)

190 Dude needs to be driven deep into the forest, handed an axe, a lighter, and a canteen, and told that someone will be back in seven days to either congratulate him or recover the corpse.
Posted by: PabloD

I know of just the place!
https://is.gd/a3qTD1

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at April 26, 2022 04:49 PM (d82lp)

191 This redhead in a one-piece is neither a hologram nor a fictosexual:
https://is.gd/QzfZFo

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 26, 2022 04:49 PM (DU+/6)

192 This is something Japanese office workers do - they wear printed T-shirts under their dress shirt. I am not sure if it is cool, weird, or slovenly, but it is not unusual.


on a more serious note,.....

One major problem in Japanese culture is that they have a very impersonal definition of family. They are the people who you share a house with, and not a lot more for many Japanese. They see no real relationships growing up. Everything is formal and duty, and not love or devotion or emotion. This kid probably gets more attention from that doll than he ever did from his mother or father.

Posted by: Peking Duck at April 26, 2022 04:49 PM (oXeHR)

193 Somebody should tell her Musk is planning on buying Canada next.

More Herzog today:

Turn on NPR, hear phrase “menstrual equity and climate change,” turn off NPR

Posted by: The ARC of History! at April 26, 2022 04:50 PM (I2/tG)

194
Mal...the guy killed me Mal. Killed me with a sword. How weird is that?

https://youtu.be/s-LaAIXgv-8

Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie at April 26, 2022 04:50 PM (1hM1d)

195 He was "bullied" at work? I find that so hard to believe...

Posted by: t-bird at April 26, 2022 04:50 PM (Go9h8)

196 >>Say the word, ace, just say the word. Just don't freak out when the van pulls up next to you on the street.


We had an old beat up van in college and would regularly roll up on our girlfriends, jump out and throw them in the van, then peel out around the corner.

And drop them off.

Always funny to watch the looks on people's faces when you did that.

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 04:50 PM (M3Eqk)

197 You can laugh at this weirdo, but..

Turn the clock back to 1944 and Akihiko Kondo would be happy as a pig in shit to dive his zero into the flight deck of the Enterprise.

Posted by: Archer at April 26, 2022 04:50 PM (gmo/4)

198 105 Dude needs to be driven deep into the forest, handed an axe, a lighter, and a canteen, and told that someone will be back in seven days to either congratulate him or recover the corpse.
Posted by: PabloD at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (zqwN3)

Main difficulty would be boiling water. You can survive not eating for 7 days, drinking is another matter and you don't want to drink "raw" water.

Posted by: Red Turban Someguy - The Republic is already dead! at April 26, 2022 04:50 PM (b2nrj)

199 "Don't laugh too hard. America is basically ten years behind Japan sexually."

Not ALL of America!

Posted by: Kurt "Tentacle Porn" Eichenwald at April 26, 2022 04:50 PM (ZPUJH)

200
pats lin-duh's hand*

Yes, of course, dear.

I'll just let myself out.

*hands lin-duh a business card for Cat Ladies Anonymous*


Be all that as it may, but those cats have already drawn straws to decide which one of them gets the choicest bits when you expire.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 26, 2022 04:50 PM (q1ouM)

201 197 You can laugh at this weirdo, but..

Turn the clock back to 1944 and Akihiko Kondo would be happy as a pig in shit to dive his zero into the flight deck of the Enterprise.

Posted by: Archer at April 26, 2022 04:50 PM (gmo/4)

========

Gee...I wonder what happened to all the masculine genes in Japanese culture...

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (LvTSG)

202 160 I like the idea of driving the guy out into the forest for 7 days, but he also probably could learn a life lesson by being forced into a public area with no phone/electronics for 7 hours...
Posted by: Nova local at April 26, 2022 04:46 PM (exHjb)

I think he needs a group of buddies to snap him out of this and take him to the club. Actually talk to people. By people I mean women. Yes they will shut him down but he'll never score if he doesn't have an at bat.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (MySN1)

203 Son, in life, it's best not to imitate Dr. Krieger.

Posted by: The Central Scrutinizer at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (KbCG3)

204 naturalfake,
**snort**

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (UUBmN)

205 Look, I'm married. I've never had cat in my life until 3 years ago when my daughter wanted one. Then my son wanted one. And now the next-door neighbors outdoor cat lives on my front porch.... But I'm not a cat lady since none of these cats are technically mine. So, I'm not a cat lady!!!!

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (UUBmN)


Sure you ain't. Quick question -- Who buys the food, kitty litter, and puts them out for the cats? Takes 'em to the vet?

Denial -- It ain't just a river in Egypt.

Posted by: GnuBreed at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (F0YaR)

206 >> I did a 3 day solo as part of an Outward Bound type on the NH/Canada border in January. Spent most of the 3 days sitting in a fire pit I dug win the snow playing cards I made with a notepad.


Real country up there. Once got snowed in for 3 days on Mt Marcy.

Only time I have ever enjoyed spam.

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (M3Eqk)

207 80 years ago you could have flipped this dude a bottle of sake and the keys to a beat up Zero fighter and said "fetch" and he'd have dived the plane into a US carrier without even blinking.

Which raises The Eternal Question: "Japan . . . Nuked Too Much, Or Not Enough?"

Posted by: Sharkman at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (q+fko)

208 Main difficulty would be boiling water. You can survive not eating for 7 days, drinking is another matter and you don't want to drink "raw" water.
Posted by: Red Turban Someguy - The Republic is already dead! at April 26, 2022 04:50 PM (b2nrj)

Giardia ain't just a river in Egypt.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (II3Gr)

209 >>> 167 Helena,
I would like a rag doll but they are expensive!
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (UUBmN)

Hmm, they *are* cute. Does the Mr want to buy a boat or something? /bad influence

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (llON8)

210 Wow. And I thought my family was messed up.

Posted by: Tonypete at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (Msys3)

211 My first thread and comments of the day. I’ve laughed so loud the dog left the room

Posted by: Squid at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (so6un)

212 So I could just turn her power off during the 4th quarter? Hmmm, this guy may be on to something.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 26, 2022 04:52 PM (Qy7kP)

213 I wish someone would do that for me (but please actually check in after three days)

*******

Pro tip ace: Don't eat any mushrooms no matter how hungry you get, and donn't wipe your ass with poison Ivy.

Posted by: Muldoon at April 26, 2022 04:52 PM (kXYt5)

214 207 80 years ago you could have flipped this dude a bottle of sake and the keys to a beat up Zero fighter and said "fetch" and he'd have dived the plane into a US carrier without even blinking.

Which raises The Eternal Question: "Japan . . . Nuked Too Much, Or Not Enough?"
Posted by: Sharkman at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (q+fko)

=========

Far more people died in the fire bombings than in the nukes bombings.

But the fire bombings get no respect. No respect!

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:52 PM (LvTSG)

215 Don't forget grade school girls used panties in a can in vending machines. They were called "Canties", and yes they were real.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at April 26, 2022 04:45 PM (bVYXr)

Were they spectacular?

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 04:49 PM


No idea but when I got stationed there I thought everyone was messing with me about them so I went off base to check it out and yes they were real. When I saw them in a vending machine I said......you have got to fvcking kidding me. I went to the next vending machine over and bought beer.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at April 26, 2022 04:52 PM (bVYXr)

216 If this guy walked out of his apartment right now and got ran over by a payloader, the entire collective human genome would suddenly become 100% more robust.

And hologram chick would be free to strip on the virtual pole again...the circle of life, people.

Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 04:52 PM (5iUNf)

217 151 78 I bet she doesn't talk too much and shuts up when he tells her too.

Doll: +1
Actual women: - 1000
Posted by: chique l'African Viking Math Queen King of Greenland, the Merciless (don't/stop/believin') at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (cpMW3)

LOL. When he tells her to calm down, she actually does.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at April 26, 2022 04:52 PM (Qhnrt)

218 Japan does have a Suicide Forest. It's full of abandoned cars, empty tents, and dead folks.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe



Like the parking lot at Mt. Everest, without the high altitude sickness.

Posted by: Sharkman at April 26, 2022 04:52 PM (q+fko)

219
Always funny to watch the looks on people's faces when you did that.

Posted by: garrett


Yeah, but those passers by knew the young ladies were in no danger.

Your crocs were the tell.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 26, 2022 04:52 PM (q1ouM)

220 What until we have the hologram movement for equality. This man will be chased around by blue hair freaks demanding he free his fictional sex slaves.

Posted by: William Eaton at April 26, 2022 04:53 PM (cfkTP)

221 But, can she make a sammich?

Posted by: Mr Wolf at April 26, 2022 04:53 PM (hiYlW)

222 Man! Ole Chucky Johnson sure has fallen. I knew he was a fucked up individual, but not that fucked up.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at April 26, 2022 04:53 PM (QSjkU)

223 Is he sure it is lack of software support? Maybe his doll is just mad at him.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 26, 2022 04:53 PM (5kI0z)

224 Does she ever shit the bed ?

Posted by: J Depp at April 26, 2022 04:53 PM (2cfUo)

225 Poor guy. He never gets his margin blown.

Posted by: 40 Miles North at April 26, 2022 04:53 PM (uWF4x)

226 105 Dude needs to be driven deep into the forest, handed an axe, a lighter, and a canteen, and told that someone will be back in seven days to either congratulate him or recover the corpse.
Posted by: PabloD at April 26, 2022 04:42 PM (zqwN3)

When my husband was joining the frat they blindfolded him and dumped him off in the middle of nowhere. He walked for hours through a ranch and found a road and hitchhiked back.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 04:54 PM (MySN1)

227 Red Turban Someguy - I'd give him a metal canteen for boiling water. I'm nice like that.

Posted by: PabloD at April 26, 2022 04:54 PM (zqwN3)

228 You're just like your father!

Yeah, well you're just like Windows 10!

Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 26, 2022 04:54 PM (Qy7kP)

229 At least he never hears "If you don't already know what's wrong, there's no point trying to explain it to you!" Or "you make me SICK!"

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:54 PM (II3Gr)

230 Peking Duck is still butt-hurt about the rape of Nanking (or as they call it now Nanjing)

Posted by: Regular joe at April 26, 2022 04:54 PM (nnp+f)

231 What is the name this guy comments with at the hq

Posted by: Y5 at April 26, 2022 04:55 PM (nBCCt)

232 >>Real country up there. Once got snowed in for 3 days on Mt Marcy.

>>Only time I have ever enjoyed spam.

We lucked into good weather for most of the 10 day trip but we spent almost the entire week on snowshoes. The snow was at least 3 feet deep and in some places the drifts were over 6 feet.

7 days were group hiking and mountaineering type training and 3 days of solo. It was actually a lot of fun and very, very quiet.

Posted by: JackStraw at April 26, 2022 04:55 PM (ZLI7S)

233 231 What is the name this guy comments with at the hq
Posted by: Y5 at April 26, 2022 04:55 PM (nBCCt)

Gotta be Masturbatin Pete

Posted by: The Central Scrutinizer at April 26, 2022 04:55 PM (KbCG3)

234 This guy makes me sad. I need an article about tatersexual, which would only make me sick

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 26, 2022 04:55 PM (jEmCU)

235 I've actually never met a woman who was good at making sandwiches.

Posted by: Max Power at April 26, 2022 04:55 PM (k7+BO)

236 What happens when the battery dies. A funeral?

Posted by: USNtakim deplorable still. at April 26, 2022 04:55 PM (0OmEj)

237 Ha! My use of cuck and wife....strike it and reverse it. Seriously, though. Although I've been happily married for years, as someone who in college has made multiple hand babies with Japanese women....what the hell is going on over there?

Posted by: Landofskybluewater at April 26, 2022 04:55 PM (+tgR5)

238 "Imaginary lovers, Never turn you down. When all the others turn you away, they're around..."

Posted by: Mookie at April 26, 2022 04:56 PM (u+Y3T)

239 Hmm, they *are* cute. Does the Mr want to buy a boat or something? /bad influence
Posted by: Helena Handbasket
-------
Look, the Mr. has a woodshop in our garage...which I can no longer park in... he has spent well over 5 digits and all the tools contained on said garage...I should be able to get one kitten...but I'm NOT a cat lady!!!

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:56 PM (UUBmN)

240 Pro tip ace: Don't eat any mushrooms no matter how hungry you get, and donn't wipe your ass with poison Ivy.
Posted by: Muldoon

Listen to this man. He completed Pre-Med.

Posted by: Tonypete at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (Msys3)

241 But, can she make a sammich?
Posted by: Mr Wolf at April 26, 2022 04:53 PM (hiYlW)
.......


Not even a fucking spring roll.

Posted by: wth at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (v0R5T)

242 but I'm NOT a cat lady!!!

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:56 PM (UUBmN)

It's OK*. We'll love you anyway.


*Unless you are an actual cat lady.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (SH2Zi)

243 180 I did a 3 day solo as part of an Outward Bound type on the NH/Canada border in January. Spent most of the 3 days sitting in a fire pit I dug win the snow playing cards I made with a notepad.

Posted by: JackStraw at April 26, 2022 04:48 PM (ZLI7S)

Last week of my NOLS course was in the high country of the Absarokas in Wyoming. We were stripped of anything edible before heading out.
There were no fish in the headwaters, very little ground cover / berries to eat. Toothpaste started to look mighty appealing.

By the time we got down to where there was edible vegetation and fish in the stream, we'd just about gone Lord of the Flies.

Having Giardia didn't help the experience...

Posted by: browndog Official Mascot of Team Gizzard at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (BgMrQ)

244 240 Pro tip ace: Don't eat any mushrooms no matter how hungry you get, and donn't wipe your ass with poison Ivy.
Posted by: Muldoon

Listen to this man. He completed Pre-Med.
Posted by: Tonypete at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (Msys3)

========

I thought he was pre-law.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (LvTSG)

245 214
Far more people died in the fire bombings than in the nukes bombings.

But the fire bombings get no respect. No respect!
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:52 PM

I helped firebombings got thee recognition they deserved in the Western theatre. Fucked me up as bad as the nukes did the Japs!

Posted by: Kurt Vonnegut and Slaughterhouse 5 at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (ZPUJH)

246 Don't laugh too hard. America is basically ten years behind Japan sexually.

3 yrs ago there was a story about a Brit lady who wanted to marry a chandelier.

Posted by: Iron Mike Golf at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (8C7+r)

247 Does this make me less sad, more sad, or equally as sad?

Posted by: Guy caught f*cking horses at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (+tgR5)

248 I thought he was pre-law.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (LvTSG)

Pre-med - pre-law - same thing.

Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 04:58 PM (5iUNf)

249 I just can't.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 26, 2022 04:58 PM (h1mzz)

250 246 Don't laugh too hard. America is basically ten years behind Japan sexually.

3 yrs ago there was a story about a Brit lady who wanted to marry a chandelier.
Posted by: Iron Mike Golf at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (8C7+r)

Wedding song was 'You Light up my Life'?

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 26, 2022 04:58 PM (oHd/0)

251 She has man hands

Posted by: Dread at April 26, 2022 04:58 PM (MBvXX)

252 Hatsune Miku is my 16 yo daughter's favorite, umm, whatever she is. And so I know way too much about her for a non weeb. She isn't really anime. She's a vocaloid, which is a computer voicebank that people use to make songs. The animated character came later to support the voice character, and the long blue hair is her trademark.

Anyway, she does "live" musical performances as a hologram with live background instruments and accompaniment.

This dude, umm, well, they say that there is a problem with Japanese dudes not wanting to make the sexy with real Japanese girls. Exhibit #1.

Posted by: blaster at April 26, 2022 04:58 PM (9otr5)

253
The family disapproved of Miku because she came from a poor family of fisherfolk. And also, because she does not exist.


ALRIGHT, WHAT IDIOT OF AN EDITOR LET THIS ONE SLIP THROUGH? IT'S A CLASSIC SETUP FOR THE OLD "A" AND "B", BUT MOSTLY "A".

NO MONTHLY BONUS FOR YOU!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 26, 2022 04:58 PM (q1ouM)

254 Japanese people can be very strange.

(I denounce myself for racism)

((But it's true))

Posted by: a.moron at April 26, 2022 04:58 PM (tu3iY)

255 The second definition is, "the guy who played the synth gong in the Revenge of the Nerds Lambda Lambda Lambda band."

You owe me a keyboard, Ace.

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at April 26, 2022 04:59 PM (906pl)

256 okay so starting fire would be a big problem

BUT

let's be serious, IF this is a seven day thing, I can probably get some safe water here and there and if I have to I can drink raw water the last three days and then depend on medical attention upon rescue to clear out the pathogens.

Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 04:59 PM (0G13K)

257 3 yrs ago there was a story about a Brit lady who wanted to marry a chandelier.
Posted by: Iron Mike Golf at April 26, 2022 04:57 PM (8C7+r)

Wedding song was 'You Light up my Life'?
Posted by: Romeo13 at April 26, 2022 04:58 PM (oHd/0)

Blinded by the Light.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 26, 2022 04:59 PM (74/x3)

258
Psaki said US not expecting food shortages at home.

That's the signal to prep if I ever heard one.

Next will come food shortages at home are transitory.

Posted by: publius, Rascally Rapscallion (Mzdiz) at April 26, 2022 04:59 PM (Mzdiz)

259 Ha! What a loser!

Posted by: Guy who f*cks car's tailpipes at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (+tgR5)

260 I've read about a forest that's below Mt Fuji and people go and commit suicide. I suggest not taking this guy there.
Posted by: Puddleglum at April 26, 2022 04:44 PM (sAmhv)
Aokigahara. It's creepy AF.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 04:47 PM (II3Gr)


I went by there last time I was in Japan.

Oddly enough, I didn't commit suicide.

Though I did get into a game of strip poker with a gang of lonely lady ghosts.

Posted by: naturalfake at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (5NkmN)

261 BTW Ace, it was Lamar from Lambda Lambda Lambda. Or was it The redheaded dude. Gilbert? Can't remember. The cheerleader was hot though.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (h1mzz)

262 You're just like your father!

Yeah, well you're just like Windows 10!
Posted by: Duke Lowell


******

Threadwinner!!

Posted by: Muldoon at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (kXYt5)

263 After 3 weeks mostly alone at the far side of the lake fishing cabin I was talking to the cats. And being a lot more careful on the bow of the boat in windy weather.

Posted by: DaveA at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (FhXTo)

264 Probably never nags him about his socks on the floor. Or that he works too much. Or that he should be making more money. Or doesn't pay enough attention to her. Or that he's too needy.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (II3Gr)

265 Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:56 PM (UUBmN)

My garage contains no cars, but a metal cutting lathe, a vertical mill, a metal cutting bandsaw, a wood cutting bandsaw, a belt sander, a welder, bench grinder, heavy work bench, roll around tool box, a second work bench, shelves, a riding mower, two motorcycles, scrap metal, and a few odds and ends. It has never had a car in it.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (QSjkU)

266 Look, the Mr. has a woodshop in our garage...which I can no longer park in... he has spent well over 5 digits and all the tools contained on said garage...I should be able to get one kitten...but I'm NOT a cat lady!!!
Posted by: lin-duh

The lady doth protest too much, methinks.

Posted by: Queen Gertrude at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (Msys3)

267
By the time we got down to where there was edible vegetation and fish in the stream, we'd just about gone Lord of the Flies.

Having Giardia didn't help the experience...
Posted by: browndog Official Mascot of T

That sounds horrible.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (MySN1)

268 >??BTW Ace, it was Lamar from Lambda Lambda Lambda

no he did like a break dance. they had an asian guy who sounded the gong

Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (0G13K)

269 DON'T DATE ROBOTS!!

Brought to you by the Space Pope

Posted by: CrazyIvan at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (VUhjY)

270 NO! YOU MANIAC, YOU BLEW HER UP! GOD DAMN YOU, GOD DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!

Posted by: Dr. Krieger (not the real kind of doctor (or the other kind)) at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (fECer)

271 Look, the Mr. has a woodshop in our garage...which I can no longer park in... he has spent well over 5 digits and all the tools contained on said garage...I should be able to get one kitten...but I'm NOT a cat lady!!!
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:56 PM (UUBmN)

LOL... I cleaned out my garage last week, first time I could park a car in it in a year or so... and just ordered the new Camaro.

Yeah.... single....

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (oHd/0)

272 Center for Voter Information is a non-profit, non-partisan partner organization to Voter Participation Center, both founded to provide resources and tools to help voting-eligible citizens register and vote in upcoming elections.
____________

Sounds like a commie front. "Non-partisan?" Ain't no such thing. It's a commie front flying under the radar.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (YqDXo)

273 Psaki said US not expecting food shortages at home.

Well not HER home. It's stocked with ginger bread.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (h1mzz)

274 Cherry 2000 is looking better and better as an option.

Posted by: GnuBreed at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (F0YaR)

275

BUT

let's be serious, IF this is a seven day thing, I can probably get some safe water here and there and if I have to I can drink raw water the last three days and then depend on medical attention upon rescue to clear out the pathogens.

Posted by: ace
----
Couldn't you smuggle a life straw in your prison wallet? they're pretty small...

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 05:01 PM (UUBmN)

276 269 DON'T DATE ROBOTS!!

Brought to you by the Space Pope
Posted by: CrazyIvan at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (VUhjY)

Come on... not even a Cherry 2000?

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 26, 2022 05:01 PM (oHd/0)

277 In fairness raping then murdering 300,000 over a month does seem a bit more disturbing than just doing it in an instant with a bombing

It is sort of the difference between surprise anal ND slow motion anal

Posted by: Y5 at April 26, 2022 05:01 PM (nBCCt)

278 Never bang the 1.0 fembot, wait for the first two patches at least

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 26, 2022 05:01 PM (XvPQV)

279 Posted by: Xipe Totec at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (QSjkU)

Can I come over and play with your toys someday?

Posted by: moon_over_vermont at April 26, 2022 05:02 PM (NxOLn)

280 278 Never bang the 1.0 fembot, wait for the first two patches at least
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 26, 2022 05:01 PM (XvPQV)

=========

If you're not willing to bang the fembot with gun boobs that may accidentally go off, you're no real man.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 05:02 PM (LvTSG)

281 no he did like a break dance. they had an asian guy who sounded the gong

Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (0G13K)

He's famous for the hair pie line during the panty raid.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 05:02 PM (SH2Zi)

282 256 okay so starting fire would be a big problem

BUT

let's be serious, IF this is a seven day thing, I can probably get some safe water here and there and if I have to I can drink raw water the last three days and then depend on medical attention upon rescue to clear out the pathogens.

Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 04:59 PM (0G13K)

A lighter was specified as part of the starting package. Starting a fire shouldn't be a problem.

Posted by: Red Turban Someguy - The Republic is already dead! at April 26, 2022 05:02 PM (b2nrj)

283 no he did like a break dance. they had an asian guy who sounded the gong
Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM

Yep, memory is the first to go. Best line of the movie. This is bullshit, pan down I want to see bush!

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 26, 2022 05:02 PM (h1mzz)

284 What's weird about Revenge of the Nerds is that the only other movie I know Robert Carradine from is The Cowboys with Duke Wayne.

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at April 26, 2022 05:02 PM (906pl)

285 teledildonics?? tele-dildo-nics??
-----------------------

Is this about CBD's nic? Or some kind of long distant nic-related sexting relationship between morons?

Posted by: olddog in mo at April 26, 2022 05:02 PM (ju2Fy)

286 278 Never bang the 1.0 fembot, wait for the first two patches at least
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 26, 2022 05:01 PM (XvPQV)

By then she's running the 304 subroutine and out banging ChadBot behind your back.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:02 PM (II3Gr)

287 Otaku.

New word of the day.

Sounds like a type of Ikea shelf.

Posted by: Deplorable Ian Galt at April 26, 2022 05:03 PM (ufFY8)

288 I should be able to get one kitten...
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:56 PM (UUBmN)

I see where this is going.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Break The Teachers Unions at April 26, 2022 05:03 PM (5qR8o)

289 Couldn't you smuggle a life straw in your prison wallet? they're pretty small...

I like where your head is at in general, in the box problem solving and all, but I'm somewhat alarmed by your assessment of the storage capacity of the male ass.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at April 26, 2022 05:03 PM (ppBhU)

290 Akihiko Kondo

Look at his eyes.

Turn the clock back to 1943 and he'd happily lead a banzai charge on Guadalcanal.

Posted by: Archer at April 26, 2022 05:03 PM (gmo/4)

291 Never bang the 1.0 fembot.

In hindsight the combination vagina / blender unit was a serious design flaw.

Posted by: PabloD at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (zqwN3)

292 I should be able to get one kitten...
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:56 PM (UUBmN)

"I should be able to mainline just one dose of China White."

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (II3Gr)

293 >>> 258
Psaki said US not expecting food shortages at home.

That's the signal to prep if I ever heard one.

Next will come food shortages at home are transitory.
Posted by: publius, Rascally Rapscallion (Mzdiz) at April 26, 2022 04:59 PM (Mzdiz)

"It's because of Putin! and DeathSantis!! and Abbott and Musk and ...."

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (llON8)

294 Helena,
I would like a rag doll but they are expensive!
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022


***
There's always Siberians too. Probably in the same price range.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (txdEq)

295 Its for the best. He probably shouldn't ever reproduce.

Posted by: USNtakim deplorable still. at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (0OmEj)

296 PaoloBot

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (74/x3)

297 A Samurai is rolling in his grave somewhere

Posted by: Skip at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (2JoB8)

298 My garage contains no cars, but a metal cutting lathe, a vertical mill, a metal cutting bandsaw, a wood cutting bandsaw, a belt sander, a welder, bench grinder, heavy work bench, roll around tool box, a second work bench, shelves, a riding mower, two motorcycles, scrap metal, and a few odds and ends. It has never had a car in it.
Posted by: Xipe Totec at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (QSjkU)
____________

Mine contains a complete gym, with power rack with lat pull down and rowing stations, Olympic barbell and plates, a set of dumb bells, pull-up bar, sit-up bench, and of course adjustable bench for bench press and shoulder presses. And a flat screen TV, on which I used to watch MLB.

With all that, I figure I don't actually have to do any exercises, right?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (YqDXo)

299 There is never enough Paolo to go around. So I shall to create a holgram phanto-bull and market it on National Review, the Bulwark, AEI, and on the cruise lines.

Posted by: The Paolo at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (786Ro)

300 Judging by the last pic, Hologirl knows how to make coffee.

Posted by: Preparing gp For Lazy Loading at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (qpX6U)

301 Not Otaku:

https://youtu.be/C0X3CLJVMJU

Posted by: Deplorable Ian Galt at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (ufFY8)

302 This post brought to you by Kleenex Plus with aloe.

Posted by: Citizen Cake at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (HmZuC)

303 So does this mean this chick is available?

....asking for a friend.

Posted by: The Harry formerly known as Prince at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (+tgR5)

304 >>>Couldn't you smuggle a life straw in your prison wallet? they're pretty small...


i think that's cheating, PabloD specified the gear

Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (0G13K)

305 With all that, I figure I don't actually have to do any exercises, right?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (YqDXo)

Just reading that makes me want to flex.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (SH2Zi)

306 Psaki said US not expecting food shortages at home.

That's the signal to prep if I ever heard one.

Next will come food shortages at home are transitory.
Posted by: publius, Rascally Rapscallion (Mzdiz) at April 26, 2022 04:59 PM (Mzdiz)
__________

And after that, food shortages are good because Americans are obese. Or used to be, anyway.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (YqDXo)

307 When my husband was in college he and some buddies camped on some ranch and they helped the old man that owned the ranch butcher some deer or an elk. A couple of them ate some horrible sausage. Not all of them ate it.
When they were back at school 3 or 4 of them all were walking around itching their butts. They thought they had a parasite or something and went to the ER.
They were really embarrassed but apparently none of them had any parasites/poison oak.
To this day they don't know what was in that sausage and why their butts itched.
My husband did not eat the sausage I think.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (MySN1)

308 Why would you want to drink out of a straw you pulled out of your ass?

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (UuD2k)

309 >He's famous for the hair pie line during the panty raid.

And Booger asking him, "What the fuck's a frush?" in the poker game.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (KaCzC)

310 Did she beat the shit out of him with a leek on their honeymoon night?

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (6a+kq)

311 >>>A lighter was specified as part of the starting package. Starting a fire shouldn't be a problem.


oh okay!

Still would need to find a container.

Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (0G13K)

312 Why would you want to drink out of a straw you pulled out of your ass?

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (UuD2k)

To avoid the pathogens in the water, duh.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (SH2Zi)

313 I like where your head is at in general, in the box problem solving and all, but I'm somewhat alarmed by your assessment of the storage capacity of the male ass.
Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls


I have proof you can get a 16 oz bottle of SuPree Hand Lotion up there.

Had a convict that worked in the furniture factory. He used to try to smuggle paint stripper back into the building for the paint huffers.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (co19B)

314 $50 says you crack open a Japanese -> English dictionary and otaku translates to "dork".

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (ZSK0i)

315 I should be able to get one kitten...
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:56 PM (UUBmN)

"I should be able to mainline just one dose of China White."
Posted by: Insomniac
-------
As Duncanthrax, I have turned down a kitten before!!

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (UUBmN)

316 My other garage contains yet another metal lathe, a fully restored metal shaper. two more welders, table saw, hydraulic press, another metal cutting bandsaw, another wood cutting bandsaw, more work benches, two farm tractors, a wood miser sawmill, farm implements, etc. I got a lots 'O' shit.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (QSjkU)

317 310 Did she beat the shit out of him with a leek on their honeymoon night?
Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (6a+kq)

Leek...spinner?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (XvPQV)

318
284 What's weird about Revenge of the Nerds is that the only other movie I know Robert Carradine from is The Cowboys with Duke Wayne.
Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at April 26, 2022 05:02 PM (906pl)

Cowboys was a decent movie.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (Qhnrt)

319 That fictosexual is going to end up like the computer geek from Ex Machina

Posted by: Ripley at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (MxEKc)

320 What does the Yamaha Corporation, the creators and copyright holders of Hatsune Miku, think of all this?

Posted by: Surfperch at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (eRVYd)

321 75 someone blew the margins today
---------------------------
And she caught Covid.
Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at April 26, 2022 04:39 PM (UHVv4)

Good one!

Posted by: m at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (rI4Wv)

322 This makes me think of that old, obscure move, "Magic" where a ventriloquist is obsessed with his dummy. I think he goes on to murder someone, but the audience is left wondering if there was something supernatural and the dummy actually committed the murder.

Posted by: InCali at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (jZOLv)

323 To this day they don't know what was in that sausage and why their butts itched.
My husband did not eat the sausage I think.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (MySN1)

Did it taste like chloroform?

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (SH2Zi)

324 >>> 315 I should be able to get one kitten...
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 04:56 PM (UUBmN)

"I should be able to mainline just one dose of China White."
Posted by: Insomniac
-------
Ask Duncanthrax, I have turned down a kitten before!!
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (UUBmN)

It's true!

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (llON8)

325 A lighter was specified as part of the starting package. Starting a fire shouldn't be a problem.


oh okay!

Still would need to find a container.
Posted by: ace at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM

You can boil water in a paper cup. You just have to hold it high enough above the flames without burning the cup.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (h1mzz)

326
YO.

Sly Stallonk's favorite superheroes who became queers:

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (do2wA)

327 The fundamental conflict of our times and into the foreseeable future is humans (being and acting human) vs. machines (being and acting like a machine).

Posted by: Rusty Trawler at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (1gif2)

328

https://youtu.be/nY6tRY0Hh3c?t=75

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (do2wA)

329 "the internet and "virtual communication" and "virtual experiences" and and remote-control "virtual sex" -- "teledildonics" -- were going to improve the human condition."

It won't necessarily improve it, but it's gonna happen whether we like it or not. Transhumanism and computer-brain interfaces are going to turn us into a variety of new genera and species. By 3000AD, we'll be like the sparkling energy snotgobs in the movie "AI."

Not better in any sense we understand now. But inevitable.

Posted by: Preparing gp For Lazy Loading at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (qpX6U)

330 With all that, I figure I don't actually have to do any exercises, right?
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (YqDXo)

This is good clear logic.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (QSjkU)

331 Psaki said US not expecting food shortages at home.



REMEMBER, THURSDAY IS SOYLENT GREEN DAY!

Posted by: Archer at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (gmo/4)

332 Might be handy to have a wife you can keep in a jar.

And unplug when you don't want to listen to her.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (k4dH2)

333 Their ass itched bc they didn't wash their ass for a few days.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (UuD2k)

334 >>Mine contains a complete gym, with power rack with lat pull down and rowing stations, Olympic barbell and plates, a set of dumb bells, pull-up bar, sit-up bench, and of course adjustable bench for bench press and shoulder presses.

Mine contains a nuclear reactor, strippers on poles, and endless steaks on open grills....and an open bar serving only premium liquor.

Or a leased Toyota Highlander - yeah, probably that.

Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (5iUNf)

335 Yep, the playbook for anything, inflation, CRT, grooming kids, food shortages goes like this:

I worried about X resulting. That's silly, there will be no X and you're idiot.

Well, I see X happening now. No you idiot, there is no X, you're lying.

X is starting to get really had. Well, we have a little X, but it's transitory an nothing to worry about.

Well, X has taken over. Yes! X is a good thing!

Posted by: publius, Rascally Rapscallion (Mzdiz) at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (Mzdiz)

336 Leek...spinner?
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (XvPQV)

I dunno, but I took one, and some damned Eskimo kicked me in the icehole.

Posted by: The Polar Bear at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (Gwzne)

337 Just drink the blood of the bear that you murder with your bare hands.

This isn't hard.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (LvTSG)

338 As I clarified above, I'd issue a metal canteen as part of the gear so you could boil water.

Posted by: PabloD at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (zqwN3)

339 305 With all that, I figure I don't actually have to do any exercises, right?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (YqDXo)

Just reading that makes me want to flex.
Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (SH2Zi)
_________

Well, if you flex, I don't have to, the way I figure it. I also put down interlocking cushiony sheets, so the whole thing is really quite nice.

Unfortunately, it means the cars get fried by the SoCal sun. I just finished sanding, priming, painting, and then clearcoating my ancient Saturn, but hey. It's a small price to pay.

I've had this garage gym for 20 years, but as 29+ recedes into the rear view mirror, it's getting harder and harder to work out properly.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (YqDXo)

340 Robert Carradine from is The Cowboys with Duke Wayne.
Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at April 26, 2022 05:02 PM (906pl)

Also The Long Riders with his brothers and the Keach brothers And some other brothers. Blanking on whom.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Gen X Ne'er-Do-Well at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (xPJvm)

341 That sounds horrible.
Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 05:00 PM (MySN1)

Funny thing is, now I look back on it fondly...

We had one young lady, who's parents had sent her out to NOLS to "toughen her up". She was the text book definition of a Princess.

We had to breakout the ropes to get down a steep section, and she was complaining she couldn't handle her pack while on belay...
Turned out she had like 30lbs of rocks she collected, stuffed in her backpack.
To a man we all said, fuck that shit...you want 'em, you carry 'em.

#good times

Posted by: browndog Official Mascot of Team Gizzard at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (BgMrQ)

342 >>By the time we got down to where there was edible vegetation and fish in the stream, we'd just about gone Lord of the Flies.

>>Having Giardia didn't help the experience...

Mine wasn't nearly as extreme as yours. They gave us a handful of wooden safety matches and a couple packets each of dry soup mix and hot cocoa and one pot. I could have used a bit more food but I wasn't going to starve.

Posted by: JackStraw at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (ZLI7S)

343 The thing with Japanese is that they don't have any intermediate settings. The phrase "overdoing it" doesn't exist for them.

If they decide to do ANYTHING, whether it's flying a planeload of explosives into an enemy ship, cutting out their own intestines, or being a gigantic asocial nerd, it's motherfucking "BANZAI!!!" time.

Posted by: Rodrigo Borgia at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (bW8dp)

344 Why would you want to drink out of a straw you pulled out of your ass?

Posted by: sniffybigtoe
-----
It would be in a baggie...duh!!!

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (UUBmN)

345 Ok. So where do I fit in this whole situation?

Posted by: Tentacle Porn at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (+tgR5)

346 Mine contains a nuclear reactor, strippers on poles, and endless steaks on open grills....and an open bar serving only premium liquor.

Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (5iUNf)
____________

Shit. Care to swap? Please?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (YqDXo)

347
Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (MySN1)

Did it taste like chloroform?
Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 05:07 PM (SH2Zi)

I didn't want to say it. I wonder what the Dr in the ER thought?

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (MySN1)

348 Blue-hair baby, 2D-lady, seam-stretch for the glans
Pretty-eyed, pirate trial, you'll marry a phanto-man
Clitterina, you must've seen her dancing in the LAN
And now she's in me, always with me, tiny dancer in my hand

Hold me closer, tiny dancer ...

Posted by: ShainS -- #SaveOurChildren at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (oN+s2)

349 Hey ace. If you can hike 1/2 mile downhill from the drop-off point you will come to my mountain redoubt and hang with me and my wife for 6-1/2 days. We have an outdoor fire pit, propane grill, full kitchen, food, water, booze, in-floor heat and high speed internet as well as 600 episodes of Gunsmoke on DVD. The stars at night will knock you out with no ambient light pollution around. No S'mores though. In fact, just last week I spent 5 days here all by myself and survived just fine.

Posted by: Muldoon at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (kXYt5)

350 And after that, food shortages are good because Americans are obese. Or used to be, anyway.


Here's why cannibalism is actually good.

Posted by: Vox at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (ZsR3z)

351 Had a convict that worked in the furniture factory. He used to try to smuggle paint stripper back into the building for the paint huffers.
Posted by: rickb223

Jeebus. And I thought I had led a dissolute life.

Posted by: Tonypete at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (Msys3)

352 By then she's running the 304 subroutine and out banging ChadBot behind your back.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:02 PM (II3Gr)

I KNEW it!

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (XvPQV)

353 Psaki said US not expecting food shortages at home.
_____________

Yes, and she's also expecting that the US can provide unlimited amounts of food, housing, medical care, and various other types of welfare for the tens of millions of poor illegal aliens flooding across our southern border.

Because . . . shut up, raaaaaacist!

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at April 26, 2022 05:10 PM (k4dH2)

354 345 Ok. So where do I fit in this whole situation?
Posted by: Tentacle Porn at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (+tgR5)

=========

"You're just jealous."
-Tree vine porn, brought to you by Sam Raimi in Evil Dead

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 05:10 PM (LvTSG)

355
We had to breakout the ropes to get down a steep section, and she was complaining she couldn't handle her pack while on belay...
Turned out she had like 30lbs of rocks she collected, stuffed in her backpack.
To a man we all said, fuck that shit...you want 'em, you carry 'em.

#good times
Posted by: browndog Official Mascot of

That's a good lesson for a princess to learn, carry your own weight.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 05:10 PM (MySN1)

356 >>>>Couldn't you smuggle a life straw in your prison wallet? they're pretty small...


You are assuming Ace can pass the Pencil Test.

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 05:10 PM (M3Eqk)

357 osted by: lin-duh

No; One cat would not qualify you as a cat lady. Your husband doesn't want a cat?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 26, 2022 05:11 PM (fF2aM)

358 This redhead in a one-piece is neither a hologram nor a fictosexual:
https://is.gd/QzfZFo
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!)


She is, however, basically fictional to all of us.

On the other hand, Kondo has a plastic doll and a plushie of Miku.

Advantage.....nope. Nobody has any advantage here.

Posted by: mikeski at April 26, 2022 05:11 PM (P1f+c)

359 >>>To this day they don't know what was in that sausage and why their butts itched.

Word.

Posted by: Kamala Harris at April 26, 2022 05:12 PM (HmZuC)

360 356 >>>>Couldn't you smuggle a life straw in your prison wallet? they're pretty small...


You are assuming Ace can pass the Pencil Test.
Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2022 05:10 PM (M3Eqk)

Well garrett would be the expert on what Ace's ass can fit.

Posted by: Red Turban Someguy - The Republic is already dead! at April 26, 2022 05:12 PM (b2nrj)

361 If I'm going to rough it I'm damn sure gong to be comfortable doing it!

Posted by: Muldoon at April 26, 2022 05:12 PM (kXYt5)

362 Well if you can't get laid in Tokyo, you might as well go ficto-sexual.

Posted by: borderline at April 26, 2022 05:12 PM (rPV4g)

363 I see everyone already beat me to the Krieger references.

Posted by: Jordan61 at April 26, 2022 05:12 PM (DRSnL)

364 Judging by the last pic, Hologirl knows how to make coffee.
Posted by: Preparing gp For Lazy Loading at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM 

Now wait a second, maybe this hologram girl is worth another look

Posted by: Skip at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (2JoB8)

365 "To this day they don't know what was in that sausage and why their butts itched."

Fennel. Scabies.

Posted by: Preparing gp For Lazy Loading at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (qpX6U)

366 That's a good lesson for a princess to learn, carry your own weight.
Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 05:10 PM (MySN1)

As a gentleman, I would have offered to carry them for her, in exchange for certain favors.....

Posted by: Xipe Totec at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (QSjkU)

367 333 Their ass itched bc they didn't wash their ass for a few days.
Posted by: sniffybigtoe at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (UuD2k)


They were saying it was painful unrelenting itching. Worse than poison oak. There was nothing wrong with them and you're probably right.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (MySN1)

368 >>Psaki said US not expecting food shortages at home.

She meant us - an in the Psaki family. You? Not so much.

Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (5iUNf)

369 305 With all that, I figure I don't actually have to do any exercises, right?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:04 PM (YqDXo)

Just reading that makes me want to flex.
Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder, saboteur at April 26, 2022 05:05 PM (SH2Zi)
___________

I've had buddies come over to work out with me and shoot the bull between sets. Good times.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (YqDXo)

370 368 >>Psaki said US not expecting food shortages at home.

She meant us - an in the Psaki family. You? Not so much.
Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (5iUNf)

========

"Food shortages are really an upper class problem."
-Ron Klain, in like a week

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (LvTSG)

371 363 I see everyone already beat me to the Krieger references.
Posted by: Jordan61 at April 26, 2022 05:12 PM (DRSnL)

I'm really not comfortable with the whole "clone bone" thing.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (II3Gr)

372 In fact, just last week I spent 5 days here all by myself and survived just fine.
Posted by: Muldoon at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (kXYt5)

Boss from a previous job had a nice little mountain ranch west of Fort Collins. A big spring blizzard was on its way, so he told his wife, "better go make sure the horses are okay."

He spent four glorious days sipping bourbon, eating steak and taters, watching the snow fly and reading by the fireplace without his wife and daughters. I was super jealous.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Gen X Ne'er-Do-Well at April 26, 2022 05:14 PM (xPJvm)

373 314 $50 says you crack open a Japanese -> English dictionary and otaku translates to "dork".
Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at April 26, 2022 05:06 PM (ZSK0i)

Here's what's in Wikipedia

In modern Japanese slang, the term otaku is mostly equivalent to "geek" or "nerd"

Posted by: m at April 26, 2022 05:14 PM (rI4Wv)

374 I'm really not comfortable with the whole "clone bone" thing.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (II3Gr)


I think my favorite was when Burt Reynolds saw her and said, "is that a ghost?"

Posted by: Jordan61 at April 26, 2022 05:14 PM (DRSnL)

375 To this day they don't know what was in that sausage and why their butts itched.
_____________

That's their story, and they're sticking to it.

"There was this one time at band camp ..."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:14 PM (YqDXo)

376 This is fun in a black humor sort of way.
Guest on a Ukrainian talk show cracks himself up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch
v=FibiGxjwtYI&t=120s

Posted by: gourmand du jour at April 26, 2022 05:14 PM (jTmQV)

377 I bet he has a totally cherry van, though.

Posted by: Dr. Algernon Krieger at April 26, 2022 05:14 PM (G/hTV)

378 Too late for snarking, and it was so - ripe.

Posted by: kraken at April 26, 2022 05:15 PM (Vr12I)

379 I think my favorite was when Burt Reynolds saw her and said, "is that a ghost?"
Posted by: Jordan61 at April 26, 2022 05:14 PM (DRSnL)

Great stuff. His van was bitchin', though.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:15 PM (II3Gr)

380 In modern Japanese slang, the term otaku is mostly equivalent to "geek" or "nerd"
Posted by: m at April 26, 2022 05:14 PM (rI4Wv)

Its beyond that. It basically means shut-in

Posted by: borderline at April 26, 2022 05:15 PM (rPV4g)

381 I'm sure that's Dr Krieger's girlfriend.
Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 26, 2022 04:31 PM

---

A hero of Kondo's. Kondo bought a van and ristens to Lush.

Posted by: Darth Randall at April 26, 2022 05:16 PM (zL564)

382
No; One cat would not qualify you as a cat lady. Your husband doesn't want a cat?
Posted by: FenelonSpoke
----
I have 3 cats living here but none are mine... Husband says with the dog, gecko, and 4 chickens we don't need anymore.

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 05:16 PM (UUBmN)

383 Someone mention an itchy anus?

Posted by: Tater Stelter at April 26, 2022 05:16 PM (+tgR5)

384 380 In modern Japanese slang, the term otaku is mostly equivalent to "geek" or "nerd"
Posted by: m at April 26, 2022 05:14 PM (rI4Wv)

Its beyond that. It basically means shut-in
Posted by: borderline at April 26, 2022 05:15 PM (rPV4g)
______________

As in "the Democrat Presidential candidate in 2020 was an otaku."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:16 PM (YqDXo)

385 "Food shortages are really an upper class problem."
-Ron Klain, in like a week
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (LvTSG)

He means that its an upper class "guilt" problem...yeah, Ronny feels bad. But his steak is delicious, perfectly cooked...and his lobster is to die for!

Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 05:16 PM (5iUNf)

386 He spent four glorious days sipping bourbon, eating steak and taters, watching the snow fly and reading by the fireplace without his wife and daughters. I was super jealous.
Posted by: Pug Mahon


*****

That's not too far off from my past week. Being retired has its good points.

Posted by: Muldoon at April 26, 2022 05:17 PM (kXYt5)

387 Oh, give me a clone/Of my own flesh and bone
With its Y-chromosome changed to X
And when it is grown/Then my own little clone
Will be of the opposite sex.

Clone, clone of my own,
With your Y-Chromosome changed to X
And when I'm alone/With my own little clone
We'll both think of nothing but sex

Posted by: Randall Garrett at April 26, 2022 05:17 PM (bW8dp)

388 Also The Long Riders with his brothers and the Keach brothers And some other brothers. Blanking on whom.
Posted by: Pug Mahon, Gen X Ne'er-Do-Well at April 26, 2022 05:08 PM (xPJvm)

Oh, right. I actually own that - as part of a three-DVD pack along with The Horse Soldiers and The Big Country - but haven't yet watched it.

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at April 26, 2022 05:18 PM (906pl)

389 Lin-duh, I'll put in a word for Chekov's breeder, Sibirskiy Siberian Cats:

https://www.facebook.com/Sibirskiysiberiancats/

Lots of nice pics on there. One of her queens just had a litter (I get first pick, she says!). Scroll down a bit.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 26, 2022 05:18 PM (txdEq)

390 So they're fucking ghosts in Japan now. Is that we're saying?

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 26, 2022 05:18 PM (XkuN6)

391
Are we at the stage in the Twitter Farce when twitter employees stage a "walk-out?"

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at April 26, 2022 05:18 PM (do2wA)

392 Japan: nuked too much, or not enough?

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 26, 2022 05:18 PM (6a+kq)

393 I have 3 cats living here but none are mine... Husband says with the dog, gecko, and 4 chickens we don't need anymore.
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 05:16 PM (UUBmN)

"Swear to God, officer, that 8-ball of coke isn't mine!"

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (II3Gr)

394 Remember when Pskanki was telling us that inflation didn't matter 'cuz it was only affecting food and energy?

Because who buys either of those, right?

Posted by: Rodrigo Borgia at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (bW8dp)

395 There's a company in Rocklin, Ca that makes a dancing robot based on a open source programmable chip that is powerful but inexpensive. It's a kit. Other stuff of course.

Posted by: torabora at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (Y274z)

396 Binge-watching Mr. InBetween. It's hot garbage, but I can't stop. So take this as a warning: don't start.

Posted by: Preparing gp For Lazy Loading at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (qpX6U)

397 And after that, food shortages are good because Americans are obese. Or used to be, anyway.


But I thought losing weight was now a white supremacist thing?

Posted by: Mookie at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (u+Y3T)

398 Oh. Uh, sorry. Thought this was the door to the bathroom.

Posted by: Chris Cuomo at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (QYPq3)

399
Because that's what's next: a lame-but-hyped-up-by-fake-news twitter employee walk-out.

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (do2wA)

400 Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 05:16 PM (UUBmN)

Cant give any of the cats to whom they belong or they're strays?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (fF2aM)

401 In modern Japanese slang, the term otaku is mostly equivalent to "geek" or "nerd"
Posted by: m at April 26, 2022 05:14 PM (rI4Wv)

Its beyond that. It basically means shut-in
Posted by: borderline at April 26, 2022 05:15 PM (rPV4g)


And there you go.

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (ZSK0i)

402 Hatsune Miku is my 16 yo daughter's favorite, umm, whatever she is. And so I know way too much about her for a non weeb. She isn't really anime. She's a vocaloid, which is a computer voicebank that people use to make songs. The animated character came later to support the voice character, and the long blue hair is her trademark.

Anyway, she does "live" musical performances as a hologram with live background instruments and accompaniment.
Posted by: blaster/i]

"She" has been on The Late Show with David Letterman, and she opened for Lady Gaga on tour.

So she's not entirely a weeb thing. Or she wasn't 7-or-so years ago.

Posted by: mikeski at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (P1f+c)

403 That was funny MUMR.

Posted by: kraken at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (Vr12I)

404 In modern Japanese slang, the term otaku is mostly equivalent to "geek" or "nerd"
Posted by: m at April 26, 2022 05:14 PM (rI4Wv)

--

Oh, he's very popular M. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wastoids, dweebies, dickheads - they all adore him. They think he's a righteous dude.

Posted by: Darth Randall at April 26, 2022 05:20 PM (zL564)

405 Thanks for the barrel save, pixy-auto-close tag.

Posted by: mikeski at April 26, 2022 05:20 PM (P1f+c)

406 caligirl,
you have admit when you mention a group of guys eating sausage and itchy butts...the horde mind will take it and run.

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 05:20 PM (UUBmN)

407
I believe it is AoS commenter 'Anna Puma' who is in charge of the "Japan - nuked too much, too little, or just enough?' argument.

In this case, my vote might be for a tad more megatons.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at April 26, 2022 05:20 PM (dQvv7)

408 392 Japan: nuked too much, or not enough?
Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 26, 2022 05:18 PM (6a+kq)

Yes, both.

Posted by: Ganowicz Commie Exterminators, LTD. at April 26, 2022 05:20 PM (onF8C)

409 Mine wasn't nearly as extreme as yours. They gave us a handful of wooden safety matches and a couple packets each of dry soup mix and hot cocoa and one pot. I could have used a bit more food but I wasn't going to starve.
Posted by: JackStraw at April 26, 2022 05:09 PM (ZLI7S)

We had been broken up into three groups:
1) The least wood crafty got the lowlands route. Plenty of fish and vegetation. And civilization wasn't that far away if trouble arose.
2) These were the instructors pets, and got to take some of the cast off food, just in case things got tight.
3) And then there was our group, we hated the instructors and they hated us. Bataan Death March...

Makes for good stories.

Posted by: browndog Official Mascot of Team Gizzard at April 26, 2022 05:20 PM (BgMrQ)

410 That was funny MUMR.
Posted by: kraken at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (Vr12I)


What was?

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at April 26, 2022 05:20 PM (ZSK0i)

411 My wife is Japanese and was once giving me a hard time for my German ancestry, to which I replied "you guys invented bukakke."

Now I can add this.

Posted by: Biden Stercore in eius braccae at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (0hHNz)

412 Afternoon.

Humans have only been around for like 250,000 years.

That little hologram in a jar thingy is really fuckin' cool. I want one. Not for sexual degeneracy, I just think it's neat.

Posted by: Robert at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (10+Dl)

413 408 392 Japan: nuked too much, or not enough?
Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 26, 2022 05:18 PM (6a+kq)

Yes, both.
Posted by: Ganowicz Commie Exterminators, LTD. at April 26, 2022 05:20 PM (onF8C)


Don't tease!

Posted by: Godzilla at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (PiwSw)

414 I saw Itchybutt Sausage open for the Meat Men at a punk club in Berkeley back in '88.

Posted by: Rodrigo Borgia at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (bW8dp)

415 Wait, she*s computer synthesized but he couldn*t get her tits any bigger than that? Fail.

Posted by: Clay, unimpressed with your wokeness at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (Gs6BU)

416 What a time To be alive!!!

Posted by: Joe XiDen - I miss Delta Variant at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (QIDr3)

417 Formless projections of light don't bust ass caps all over the house.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (co19B)

To be fair, if this guy had shagged Amber Heard, he'd at least have a good reason to go for the hologram waifu.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (F/J1O)

418 You realize Joe might be shutting down Alaskan oil drilling to pump up Russian oil prices.

Posted by: torabora at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (Y274z)

419 Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (do2wA)

They won't go. They'll just talk about it. Anyway, I'm sure they could have a lot less employees if they were spending all their time censoring conservative speech and humor, As the English say about getting fired "make them redundant".

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 26, 2022 05:22 PM (fF2aM)

420 410 That was funny MUMR.
Posted by: kraken at April 26, 2022 05:19 PM (Vr12I)

What was?
Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at April 26, 2022 05:20 PM (ZSK0i)

That's kinda funny too.

Posted by: kraken at April 26, 2022 05:22 PM (Vr12I)

421
What's really bizarre is the massive Group Think happening so fast.

Goblins on tik tok are flooding the platform with "bye twitter" fake-outage videos. Why? Because that's what "everyone" is doing.

Tik Tok Goblin: "Time to make a post a video about the current thing."

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at April 26, 2022 05:22 PM (do2wA)

422 Sad.
It's really not too many steps from the way These Kids Today are attached to their cellphones.

Posted by: m at April 26, 2022 05:22 PM (rI4Wv)

423 Oh, right. I actually own that - as part of a three-DVD pack along with The Horse Soldiers and The Big Country - but haven't yet watched it.
Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at April 26, 2022 05:18 PM (906pl)

Big County is fun...
Burl Ives steals the movie.

Posted by: browndog Official Mascot of Team Gizzard at April 26, 2022 05:23 PM (BgMrQ)

424 Wolfus,

Which one are you picking?

Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 05:23 PM (UUBmN)

425 My wife is Japanese and was once giving me a hard time for my German ancestry, to which I replied "you guys invented bukakke."

Now I can add this.
Posted by: Biden Stercore in eius braccae at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (0hHNz)

Germans and Japanese are like two sides of the same sick, perverted, degenerate coin.

Japanese have bukakke. Germans shit on each other.

Posted by: Robert at April 26, 2022 05:23 PM (10+Dl)

426 Meat Puppet doesn't have any meetings with anyone, says Junta.

Garrett Haake
@GarrettHaake
·
4h
Interesting that the VP, Press Secretary & AG have all recently gotten COVID and none have been classified as close contacts of POTUS.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Break The Teachers Unions at April 26, 2022 05:23 PM (yemn2)

427 406 caligirl,
you have admit when you mention a group of guys eating sausage and itchy butts...the horde mind will take it and run.
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 05:20 PM (UUBmN)

I knew it would but that story still cracks me up. It had to be miserable to make 5 dudes go to the emergency room together.
I would never go to that ranch again, regardless if the old man let me hunt there.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 05:23 PM (MySN1)

428 Tragedy. When your software's gone and you can't go on, its tragedy.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 26, 2022 05:24 PM (lgeFv)

429 139 agree. Wondering if he's on the autism spectrum

Posted by: the Butcher at April 26, 2022 05:24 PM (QEsfM)

430 390 So they're fucking ghosts in Japan now. Is that we're saying?

___________

At least the poor octopuses will get a break now.

Posted by: Dr. Algernon Krieger at April 26, 2022 05:24 PM (G/hTV)

431 "You're just jealous."
-Tree vine porn, brought to you by Sam Raimi in Evil Dead
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, looking great in a trenchcoat and fedora with JP Melville at April 26, 2022 05:10 PM (LvTSG)

Pshaw.
-galactic slug porn, Roger Corman's Galaxy of Terror

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:24 PM (F/J1O)

432 Big County is fun...
Burl Ives steals the movie.
Posted by: browndog Official Mascot of Team Gizzard at April 26, 2022 05:23 PM (BgMrQ)

Yup. Never quite understood the appeal of Gregory Peck but my mother used to drool over him.

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at April 26, 2022 05:24 PM (906pl)

433 I would never go to that ranch again, regardless if the old man let me hunt there.
Posted by: CaliGirl at April 26, 2022 05:23 PM (MySN1)

And be sure to turn down all offers of "sausage."

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:24 PM (II3Gr)

434 Shoulda stuck with the futa pony.

Posted by: Kondo at April 26, 2022 05:24 PM (v0R5T)

435 Are we at the stage in the Twitter Farce when twitter employees stage a "walk-out?"

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at April 26, 2022 05:18 PM (do2wA)
________________

My favorite thing in academia was students threatening the administration with a "student strike."

Uh, what labor do they have to withhold? I used to encourage student strikes. ("Are you going to take that lying down from the administration? Strike!") A nice long student strike was my fantasy. It was like the IRS declaring a strike on accepting tax payments.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:24 PM (YqDXo)

436 47 Somebody needs to get some pussy, seriously. When I was stationed in Japan there were hot Japanese women all over the place.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at April 26, 2022 04:36 PM (bVYXr)
---------------------

I once asked a Japanese woman out, and she shot me down. Ironically, it was on December 7th. True story.

Posted by: Pennsyltucky at April 26, 2022 05:25 PM (lNHqD)

437 429 139 agree. Wondering if he's on the autism spectrum
Posted by: the Butcher at April 26, 2022 05:24 PM (QEsfM)

The Whole Graph.

Posted by: kraken at April 26, 2022 05:25 PM (Vr12I)

438 430 390 So they're fucking ghosts in Japan now. Is that we're saying?

___________

At least the poor octopuses will get a break now.
Posted by: Dr. Algernon Krieger at April 26, 2022 05:24 PM (G/hTV)

The octopi do the fucking.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:25 PM (II3Gr)

439 As a gentleman, I would have offered to carry them for her, in exchange for certain favors.....
Posted by: Xipe Totec at April 26, 2022 05:13 PM (QSjkU)

Nope, nope, nope...

She was on the Matrix, but not hot!

Posted by: browndog Official Mascot of Team Gizzard at April 26, 2022 05:25 PM (BgMrQ)

440
Big County is fun...
Burl Ives steals the movie.
Posted by: browndog Official Mascot of Team Gizzard


He won an Oscar for that performance.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at April 26, 2022 05:25 PM (63Dwl)

441 Germans and Japanese are like two sides of the same sick, perverted, degenerate coin.

Japanese have bukakke. Germans shit on each other.
Posted by: Robert at April 26, 2022 05:23 PM (10+Dl)
______________

Italy was the only Axis power that seemed normal.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:26 PM (YqDXo)

442 Sick sick puppy

Posted by: Gonzotx at April 26, 2022 05:26 PM (t4poC)

443 You realize Joe might be shutting down Alaskan oil drilling to pump up Russian oil prices.
Posted by: torabora at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (Y274z)
==============
Don't know Joe's goal, in reducing domestic production but that is definitely an impact. Another impact is higher prices for me, but I suppose Joe cares more about Putin.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Break The Teachers Unions at April 26, 2022 05:26 PM (yemn2)

444 Has Goucher College grad Jonah G said he is quitting the Twatters?

Posted by: Joe XiDen - I miss Delta Variant at April 26, 2022 05:26 PM (QIDr3)

445 418 You realize Joe might be shutting down Alaskan oil drilling to pump up Russian oil prices.

Posted by: torabora at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (Y274z)

---------

The only pipelines allowed here now are the ones flowing from foreign countries, primarily our "enemies," into the Biden Crime Family Strategic Reserve, with 10% pumped out for The Big Guy.

Posted by: ShainS -- #SaveOurChildren at April 26, 2022 05:26 PM (oN+s2)

446 No food shortage tonight, making ham Stromboli, pepperoni, hot capocolla, fried peppers and onions, mozzarella and provolone, tomato sauce.

Posted by: Skip at April 26, 2022 05:26 PM (2JoB8)

447 MUMR is now doing Ben Rothelisberger?

We have achieved the next stage in meta blog development!

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:27 PM (F/J1O)

448 446 No food shortage tonight, making ham Stromboli, pepperoni, hot capocolla, fried peppers and onions, mozzarella and provolone, tomato sauce.
Posted by: Skip at April 26, 2022 05:26 PM (2JoB

Lack of sausage is noted.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:27 PM (II3Gr)

449 USA oil exports break all time records!
3.8 mbd!

Posted by: Kurt at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (vUme+)

450 I once asked a Japanese woman out, and she shot me down. Ironically, it was on December 7th. True story.
Posted by: Pennsyltucky

Ya shoulda asked her again on VJ Day.....

Posted by: JT at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (arJlL)

451 Don't know Joe's goal, in reducing domestic production but that is definitely an impact. Another impact is higher prices for me, but I suppose Joe cares more about Putin.
Posted by: Huck Follywood, Break The Teachers Unions at April 26, 2022 05:26 PM (yemn2)
______________

I don't get the logic here. Reducing domestic production to "fight climate change" doesn't wash, because we just buy the same fossil fuels elsewhere, and consume exactly the same amount we did before. We just pay more for it. So, what is the logic behind all this?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (YqDXo)

452 Lack of sausage is noted.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:27 PM (II3Gr)

Hey, that's what this guy's holographic wife said!

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (906pl)

453 Pepperoni is a kind of sausage.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (F/J1O)

454 445 Has Goucher College grad Jonah G said he is quitting the Twatters?

Posted by: Joe XiDen - I miss Delta Variant at April 26, 2022 05:26 PM (QIDr3)

-------

Please tell me his handle is @AssnessChair.

Posted by: ShainS -- #SaveOurChildren at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (oN+s2)

455 Ya shoulda asked her again on VJ Day.....
Posted by: JT at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (arJlL)
____________

Nah. Ask her out on VJJ Day.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (YqDXo)

456 Its beyond that. It basically means shut-in
Posted by: borderline


Hikikomori is the word for shut-in. Most are otaku, at least in popular culture and anime references, but being an otaku doesn't require you to be a shut-in.

Otaku has some positive, or at least neutral, connotations. It's basically "geek." You can be a "train otaku," like all the folks who post in the weekend hobby thread here, or a "military otaku" or "gun otaku," like almost everyone here.....

Posted by: mikeski at April 26, 2022 05:29 PM (P1f+c)

457 "Borderline Personality Disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder."

This is what they said about my wife before she tried to shoot me.

Depp's lucky to get out alive.

Posted by: pawn at April 26, 2022 05:30 PM (Cfk8j)

458 Please tell me his handle is @AssnessChair.
Posted by: ShainS -- #SaveOurChildren at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (oN+s2)

AssnessInAChair.

Posted by: Boswell at April 26, 2022 05:30 PM (5iUNf)

459 From the NYTimes:
The decision by Twitter's board of directors on Monday afternoon to accept a takeover bid from Elon Musk means the company thinks the social media company would be best served by the ownership of a man who uses the platform to slime his critics, body-shame people, defy securities laws and relentlessly hawk cryptocurrencies.

Oh, the humanity. The real problem here is the Leftists don't like him crapping in their garden let alone owning the fucking thing. The twitrage is all about control of public speech.

Posted by: Lost In Space - Now fortified with Green Chilis at April 26, 2022 05:30 PM (9I3i5)

460 I once asked a Japanese woman out, and she shot me down. Ironically, it was on December 7th. True story.

I would have gone nuclear.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 26, 2022 05:30 PM (lgeFv)

461 453 Pepperoni is a kind of sausage.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (F/J1O)

--------

Is deep dish pizza a sandwich?

Posted by: ShainS -- #SaveOurChildren at April 26, 2022 05:30 PM (oN+s2)

462 I got 'Obsessive' from Otaku. Whether that be about work, a hobby, or whatever. The obsession in of itself is not what is...derogatory, it is how far that obsession is taken.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:31 PM (F/J1O)

463 I have been, what is it you say, downloading your holo waifu a long time.

Posted by: Th3 p4010 at April 26, 2022 05:31 PM (0fVbu)

464 Hikikomori is the word for shut-in. Most are otaku, at least in popular culture and anime references, but being an otaku doesn't require you to be a shut-in.

Otaku has some positive, or at least neutral, connotations. It's basically "geek." You can be a "train otaku," like all the folks who post in the weekend hobby thread here, or a "military otaku" or "gun otaku," like almost everyone here.....
Posted by: mikeski at April 26, 2022 05:29 PM (P1f+c)

A more extreme form of the soshukukei danshi. They aren't necessarily shut ins but have thrown up their hands and said "fuck it" when it comes to women, dating, etc.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:31 PM (II3Gr)

465 461 453 Pepperoni is a kind of sausage.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (F/J1O)

--------

Is deep dish pizza a sandwich?
Posted by: ShainS -- #SaveOurChildren

Deep dish is best viewed as ass expansion fuel.

Posted by: Lost In Space - Now fortified with Green Chilis at April 26, 2022 05:32 PM (9I3i5)

466 Pick your battles, Ace. I seriously doubt that people getting into romantic relationships with fictional holograms is going to become enough of an issue that the human race is going to devolve because of it. People like this will always exist, but they're hardly going to ever be anything more than a "lunatic fringe" that won't ever have a serious impact on society, as a whole.

And no, evolution doesn't support virtual relationships, nor will it ever, since evolution works through allele frequency changes over generations, and it's pretty fucking hard to create "generations" with a hologram, if you catch my drift.

Posted by: Goober at April 26, 2022 05:32 PM (Hgvgt)

467 Meanwhile in our society betas either troon out or develop parasocial relationships with Only Fans girls. I dunno, I don't necessarily think we're winning.

Posted by: Broseidon at April 26, 2022 05:32 PM (Bccic)

468 450 I once asked a Japanese woman out, and she shot me down. Ironically, it was on December 7th. True story.
Posted by: Pennsyltucky

Ya shoulda asked her again on VJ Day.....

Posted by: JT at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (arJlL)
-----------

Dammit! I wish I'd thought of that. It's been about 15 years, wonder if she's still around...

Posted by: Pennsyltucky at April 26, 2022 05:32 PM (lNHqD)

469 I once asked a Japanese woman out, and she shot me down. Ironically, it was on December 7th. True story.

I would have gone nuclear.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk

Should have surprised her.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 26, 2022 05:32 PM (co19B)

470 This is what they said about my wife before she tried to shoot me.

Depp's lucky to get out alive.
Posted by: pawn at April 26, 2022 05:30 PM (Cfk8j)

It's not over yet. If he wins, I could completely see her murdering him.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:32 PM (F/J1O)

471 457 "Borderline Personality Disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder."

This is what they said about my wife before she tried to shoot me.

Depp's lucky to get out alive.
Posted by: pawn at April 26, 2022 05:30 PM (Cfk8j)

Yes. He is. My high school girlfriend had these traits. She was fucking batshit, and was really good at making me batshit in turn.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:32 PM (II3Gr)

472 418 You realize Joe might be shutting down Alaskan oil drilling to pump up Russian oil prices.
Posted by: torabora at April 26, 2022 05:21 PM (Y274z)

NO!

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at April 26, 2022 05:32 PM (Qhnrt)

473 And egg wash on crust, 17 minutes on pizza stone at 425

Posted by: Skip at April 26, 2022 05:33 PM (2JoB8)

474 Is deep dish pizza a sandwich?
Posted by: ShainS -- #SaveOurChildren

Sure as fuck ain't pizza. Casserole, maybe.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:33 PM (II3Gr)

475
What is bukakke?

Is that semen to the face?

Posted by: Yo! at April 26, 2022 05:33 PM (dWj9N)

476 Late to the thread.

This, too, is the story of chemjeff.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 26, 2022 05:33 PM (ptqGC)

477 Japanese are strange, modern that is

Posted by: Skip at April 26, 2022 05:33 PM (2JoB8)

478 Suicide is an option.

Posted by: clutch cargo - Now fortified with CPM-S90V at April 26, 2022 05:34 PM (wAnMi)

479 478 Suicide is an option.
Posted by: clutch cargo - Now fortified with CPM-S90V at April 26, 2022 05:34 PM (wAnMi)

Also painless. Brings on many changes.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:34 PM (II3Gr)

480 Just Google it at work, Yo!

Posted by: PabloD at April 26, 2022 05:34 PM (zqwN3)

481
g'early evenin', 'rons

Posted by: AltonJackson at April 26, 2022 05:34 PM (DUIap)

482 476 Late to the thread.

This, too, is the story of chemjeff.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 26, 2022 05:33 PM (ptqGC)

Not enough burned flesh...

Posted by: browndog Official Mascot of Team Gizzard at April 26, 2022 05:34 PM (BgMrQ)

483 "The "science-based" people who never shut up about Believing in Evolution think that suddenly evolution is going to work virtually overnight and we're going to evolve to adapt to being a co-species with machines in a decade?"

___________

This is the same phenomenon that creates all the problems with society being bombarded by trannies and all the fukced up LGBTABCD crap. Societal norms evolved for a reason, so people could live together in a society. FML these people are nutso.

Posted by: Hatari somewhere on Ventura Highway at April 26, 2022 05:35 PM (M+Lyo)

484 A more extreme form of the soshukukei danshi. They aren't necessarily shut ins but have thrown up their hands and said "fuck it" when it comes to women, dating, etc.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker.

You just described most of the Leftist lunatics that have replaced normal life with a fantasy world of twitrage.

Posted by: Lost In Space - Now fortified with Green Chilis at April 26, 2022 05:35 PM (9I3i5)

485 479 478 Suicide is an option.
Posted by: clutch cargo - Now fortified with CPM-S90V at April 26, 2022 05:34 PM (wAnMi)

Also painless. Brings on many changes.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:34 PM (II3Gr)

And you get to bang that hot, busty brunette nurse.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:35 PM (F/J1O)

486 Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:28 PM (YqDXo)
=================
The lefties have convinced themselves that high energy costs across the board will cause a consumer rush to alternative energy production and hasten the demise of carbon energy.

Since they are thinking ideologically, they ignore resulting inflation. And economic decline. Food shortages. Social instability.

But other than those things (and more!), good plan.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Break The Teachers Unions at April 26, 2022 05:35 PM (yemn2)

487 These people exist in American culture. They're the obsessive Tumblr fanfic writers who almost all became trans. At least this guy presumably still has his dick, even if it's vestigial at this point.

Posted by: Broseidon at April 26, 2022 05:35 PM (Bccic)

488 "Borderline Personality Disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder."
.......

Plus heaps of cocaine and pills.

Posted by: wth at April 26, 2022 05:36 PM (v0R5T)

489 And you get to bang that hot, busty brunette nurse.
Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:35 PM (F/J1O)

#lt.dish

Posted by: browndog Official Mascot of Team Gizzard at April 26, 2022 05:36 PM (BgMrQ)

490 "What is bukakke? "

$20, same as in town.

Posted by: gourmand du jour at April 26, 2022 05:36 PM (jTmQV)

491 What is bukakke?

Is that semen to the face?
Posted by: Yo! at April 26, 2022 05:33 PM (dWj9N)



Ummm, yeah. Sure.

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at April 26, 2022 05:36 PM (ZSK0i)

492 A more extreme form of the soshukukei danshi. They aren't necessarily shut ins but have thrown up their hands and said "fuck it" when it comes to women, dating, etc.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 26, 2022 05:31 PM (II3Gr)

>>_>>

>>_>>

:B

Posted by: Robert at April 26, 2022 05:36 PM (10+Dl)

493 Is that semen to the face?
Posted by: Yo! at April 26, 2022 05:33 PM (dWj9N)
==============
Oh yes!

Posted by: President In Waiting, Kamala Harris at April 26, 2022 05:37 PM (yemn2)

494
Just remember who it was who said the US govt will force Twitter to be a "public utility" and act as such.

(It was me.)

Posted by: Soothsayer, the #1 name in news at April 26, 2022 05:37 PM (do2wA)

495 I assume he has a rubber blow up version

Posted by: It's me donna at April 26, 2022 05:37 PM (dvgPQ)

496 What is bukakke?
........

$20, same as in town.

Posted by: wth at April 26, 2022 05:37 PM (v0R5T)

497 At the university, I locked eyes from across the room with a half-japanese girl. I eventually asked her to go to lunch and she agreed. A little while later she backed out, saying she was seeing someone.

About a week or two later I saw her with her boyfriend, a massive landwhale with a fedora and a trench coat.

I've always thought it was just funny or disaster averted. But it was in a way one of the biggest ego-punch things to happen to me.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 26, 2022 05:38 PM (44ww/)

498 Also The Long Riders with his brothers and the Keach brothers And some other brothers. Blanking on whom.
Posted by: Pug Mahon



The Carradine's, the Keach Brothers, and the Quaid clan. I probably missed another acting family. Been a while since I've seen TLR.

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 26, 2022 05:38 PM (sAmhv)

499
I searched a word I did not know 1x

I would rather ask an look dumb than run for eye bleach

Posted by: Yo! at April 26, 2022 05:38 PM (dWj9N)

500 Ah, well. It had to be said. At least twice.

Posted by: wth at April 26, 2022 05:39 PM (v0R5T)

501 How would this guy react if somebody else close to him busted a nut on his character spouse?

Comedy gold, baby!

Posted by: Dr. Bone at April 26, 2022 05:40 PM (LkM8p)

502 >>> What is bukakke?

Is that semen to the face?
Posted by: Yo! at April 26, 2022 05:33 PM (dWj9N)


Ummm, yeah. Sure.
Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at April 26, 2022 05:36 PM (ZSK0i)


It's a floorwax AND a dessert topping!

Posted by: banana Dream at April 26, 2022 05:40 PM (0fVbu)

503 472 418 You realize Joe might be shutting down Alaskan oil drilling to pump up Russian oil prices.
Posted by: torabora

NO!

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons

FJB is banning oil exploration and extraction on 50% of National Petroleum Reserve-Alaska. He is hell bent on collapsing the economy.

https://tinyurl.com/bdfszdcu

Posted by: Lost In Space - Now fortified with Green Chilis at April 26, 2022 05:40 PM (9I3i5)

504 Ridicule is the weapon.

Homos does buttsexs. Call them on it. Dicks in shit. Yeah. I said it.

Lesbians do whatever. Y'all may like watching it on p0rnhub but it is unnatural.

Dismiss the premise.

Posted by: Golfman at April 26, 2022 05:40 PM (hOMhY)

505 It wouldn't be so bad except the dipshit in the third picture has a smug grim on his face.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 26, 2022 05:41 PM (co19B)

506 Nood.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:41 PM (F/J1O)

507 Otaku has some positive, or at least neutral, connotations. It's basically "geek." You can be a "train otaku," like all the folks who post in the weekend hobby thread here, or a "military otaku" or "gun otaku," like almost everyone here.....
Posted by: mikeski at April 26, 2022 05:29 PM (P1f+)
===

See you on the weekend otaku thread!

I like it.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at April 26, 2022 05:41 PM (EZebt)

508 FJB is banning oil exploration and extraction on 50% of National Petroleum Reserve-Alaska. He is hell bent on collapsing the economy.

https://tinyurl.com/bdfszdcu
Posted by: Lost In Space

What is his reasoning?

Posted by: rickb223 at April 26, 2022 05:42 PM (co19B)

509 When ThunderDome hits the body count of these dumbos is going to require a solution.

How do you say Soylent Green in Japanese?

Posted by: Pleistocene Megafauna at April 26, 2022 05:43 PM (aoFfE)

510
LIS,

Well I guess we are pretty fucked when our government is trying to destroy the economy and China is doubling down on destroying the supply chain with their lockdowns.

We are fucked.

Posted by: pawn at April 26, 2022 05:43 PM (Cfk8j)

511 He has no reasoning

Posted by: Skip at April 26, 2022 05:44 PM (2JoB8)

512 FJB is banning oil exploration and extraction on 50% of National Petroleum Reserve-Alaska. He is hell bent on collapsing the economy.

https://tinyurl.com/bdfszdcu
Posted by: Lost In Space - Now fortified with Green Chilis at April 26, 2022 05:40 PM (9I3i5)
..........

Surprised he hasn't sold Alaska back to Russia yet.

Posted by: wth at April 26, 2022 05:44 PM (v0R5T)

513 489 And you get to bang that hot, busty brunette nurse.
Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at April 26, 2022 05:35 PM (F/J1O)

#lt.dish
Posted by: browndog



Jo Ann Pflug

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 26, 2022 05:46 PM (sAmhv)

514 ~Sekai de ichiban ohime-sama~

Posted by: Sjg at April 26, 2022 05:51 PM (gDSJf)

515 A wife that can't communicate. Is he sad or happy?

Posted by: TitanTom at April 26, 2022 07:03 PM (oQ1G4)

516 That is one fucked up fishhead.

Posted by: Kangarew at April 26, 2022 07:29 PM (fbek4)

517 Hey dude!
Your old lady's been bonin' Spongebob Squarepants while you were at work in the IT department at Toyota.


FJB

Posted by: jbspry at April 26, 2022 08:23 PM (ATe9j)

518 Thats so sad. I have heard of this happening all over Japan. I remember when people were talking about Japan invading the US via imported products. Now its China. They won't be marrying a hologram.
Posted by: Megthered at April 26, 2022 04:40 PM (S1zYz)

They won't be marrying anyone. Mao killed off a good chunk of the women with one child policy and abortion. There are far too many males vs females, PLUS the ladies there are choose to not marry like those in the west as well.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 26, 2022 08:40 PM (eoQWY)

519 80 years ago you could have flipped this dude a bottle of sake and the keys to a beat up Zero fighter and said "fetch" and he'd have dived the plane into a US carrier without even blinking.

Which raises The Eternal Question: "Japan . . . Nuked Too Much, Or Not Enough?"
Posted by: Sharkman at April 26, 2022 04:51 PM (q+fko)

Actually most Kamikazes tended to drop on the first ship they saw, usually the destroyer screen. There's a story of a single DD that was attacked by about 30 Kamikazes and managed to shoot down/avoid all but a couple, with some aid from another DD and some fighters.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 26, 2022 08:45 PM (eoQWY)

520 Germans and Japanese are like two sides of the same sick, perverted, degenerate coin.

Japanese have bukakke. Germans shit on each other.
Posted by: Robert at April 26, 2022 05:23 PM (10+Dl)
______________

Italy was the only Axis power that seemed normal.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 26, 2022 05:26 PM (YqDXo)

They were hard to support in the desert war because they needed 4 times the water of other armies due to the pasta ration.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 26, 2022 08:50 PM (eoQWY)

521 No; One cat would not qualify you as a cat lady. Your husband doesn't want a cat?
Posted by: FenelonSpoke
----
I have 3 cats living here but none are mine... Husband says with the dog, gecko, and 4 chickens we don't need anymore.
Posted by: lin-duh at April 26, 2022 05:16 PM (UUBmN)

kitten may handle the gecko, preserving the numbers.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 26, 2022 09:05 PM (eoQWY)

522 This post was so irresponsible and potentially harmful. While reading, I laughed so hard I couldn’t get my breath!
And every time I remember the word ‘teledildonics’ I lose it again!
You have no shame—I guess I’m now officially a moron.

Posted by: Chuck Moss at April 26, 2022 10:19 PM (91ZPR)

523 Hey! Miku is my girl!!! I'm gonna kick this chinamans ass!!!

Posted by: jones at April 27, 2022 12:34 PM (UaSIU)

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