CNN Plus Was "Projected" to Garner 2 Million Subscribers In Its First Year;
Actual Current Users Per Day: Ten Thousand.

CNN Plus more like CNN Minus am i right

That's 10,000 total users per day.

For comparison, David French's wife has 40,000 users per day and she's totally uncute.

As a friend points out, most of their "subscriptions" at this point are probably free promotional ones.

13 CNN+, the CNN of news networks.
Posted by: Dr Spank

They're bracing for layoffs.

And they just started up like a week ago.

Investment and projections for CNN+ are expected to be cut dramatically in response to a low adoption rate, two sources tell Axios.

By the numbers: The news giant was initially planning to invest around $1 billion in the service over the next four years.

Hundreds of millions of dollars are expected to be cut from that original investment total.

To date, around $300 million has been spent on the subscription service, which includes a sizable marketing investment.

The new company's leadership team still has yet to decide the ultimate fate of CNN+. CNN's new boss, Chris Licht, will start May 1.

Details: CNN executives, with help from consulting firm McKinsey, originally expected to bring in around 2 million subscribers in the U.S. in the service's first year and 15-18 million after four years.

They originally planned for the service to break even after four years.

Axios reports that CNN will start offering clips or something on the free channel Roku (for cord-cutters; it's the box I have).

They say that that will drive subscribers to CNN Minus.

Um, why? Why would that happen? Why would someone seeing some clips of CNN on Roku decide to pay money for CNN Minus? People see CNN on regular cable and are not tempted at all to subscribe to CNN Minus.

More from CNBC:

Fewer than 10,000 people are using CNN+ on a daily basis two weeks into its existence, according to people familiar with the matter.

The people spoke with CNBC on the condition of anonymity in order to discuss nonpublic data.

I've got more bad news for CNN Minus: The people leaking this are probably the new management of Discovery/Warner.

They are probably leaking this to justify the brutal layoffs (or complete shut-down) to come.

They'd be leaking it because that sort of thing is always very unpopular -- journalists always publicly complain about other journalists losing their jobs, while privately giggling about it -- and so they want to establish that CNN Minus is just an absolute disaster and they had no choice.

Warner Bros. Discovery CEO David Zaslav hasn't commented publicly on CNN+'s long-term future. He told CNBC in February hed need to see how the application performed before deciding on any next moves.

"I haven't gotten a business review on what CNN+ is going to be and how it's going to be offered," Zaslav said at the time.

I think Zaslav or someone close to him might be one of the sources putting out this story.

Brian Stelter should be worried.

chriswallace.jpg

Chris Wallace should be worried, too. People might think that he'll just be moved to CNN when CNN Minus is #cancelled. But, according to Chris Wallace, he didn't want to do a "news" show any longer, and was going to do some kind of general interest chat/interview show on CNN Minus that would not be linked to the daily news cycle. He said he was tired of that sort of thing. (I wonder if he has a specific forbiddance in his Fox contract that requires a "cooling off" period before he's allowed to do the same job for a competitor.)

At any rate, when CNN Minus shuts down, Chris Wallace may go to CNN, but CNN doesn't do general interest chat and interview shows. They do political propaganda all day long.

"Fewer than 10,000 people are using CNN+ on a daily basis two weeks into its existence, according to people familiar with the matter."


Maybe they just have a messaging problem.

Posted by: Roy

Great comments today.

Posted by: Ace at 02:11 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of page)

1 That's 10,000 total users per day.

Jordan Peterson releases a youtube vid, it generates about 10k views/minute.

Posted by: kallisto at April 12, 2022 02:11 PM (DJFLF)

2 I think this is a very good network. Everyone should watch it, especially that dashing young newsman!

Posted by: Chris Wallace's Mom at April 12, 2022 02:12 PM (PiwSw)

3 I will get them

Posted by: kallisto at April 12, 2022 02:12 PM (DJFLF)

4 LOL

Posted by: RUReadingthis at April 12, 2022 02:12 PM (aQ25I)

5 Oh good. A happy story. And read the content.

Posted by: Corona-exile lost in spaces at April 12, 2022 02:12 PM (Ost4W)

6 "...but CNN doesn't do general interest chat and interview shows. They do political propaganda all day long."

Chris will fit right in!

Posted by: Joe's Left Foot at April 12, 2022 02:13 PM (hgoDd)

7 They just aren't doing enough to focus marketing efforts on their core target audience: empty seats in airport terminals.

Posted by: Anotheranon at April 12, 2022 02:13 PM (8Ze5j)

8 cnn+ is a bust and everyone knew that going in. That's the reason chrissy wallace is pi$$ed.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at April 12, 2022 02:13 PM (bVYXr)

9 That's too bad.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 12, 2022 02:13 PM (u73oe)

10 C N Ent. Viewers get to watch trees grow.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at April 12, 2022 02:13 PM (hyqTd)

11 Tater's exit strategy is 5 dollar handies in the Penn Station men's room.

Posted by: Havy Meta at April 12, 2022 02:13 PM (gryET)

12 Brilliant plan. Garbage content from a garbage company and charge people subscription fees to see it.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. Honker. at April 12, 2022 02:13 PM (II3Gr)

13 CNN+, the CNN of news networks.

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 12, 2022 02:13 PM (gZgHO)

14 >>>Fewer than 10,000 people are using CNN+ on a daily basis two weeks into its existence, according to people familiar with the matter.


Maybe they just have a messaging problem.

Posted by: Roy at April 12, 2022 02:14 PM (NOfHY)

15 I follow very niche people on youtube who can get 10K and positive participation.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 12, 2022 02:14 PM (44ww/)

16 13 CNN+, the CNN of news networks.
Posted by: Dr Spank

literal LOL

Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 02:14 PM (0G13K)

17 Lol. 'Plus' reminds too many viewers of the dress size.

Posted by: Cicero Kaboom! Kid honors math at April 12, 2022 02:14 PM (n/szn)

18 My laughing is tagged as spam

Posted by: In Reel Life (yes, dummy, on purpose) at April 12, 2022 02:14 PM (QYPq3)

19 The news giant was initially planning to invest around $1 billion in the service over the next four years.
________________

Shouldn't that read "the new gnat?"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:14 PM (YqDXo)

20 10,000. That used to be a big crowd at Wrigley circa the Lee Elia era.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (hyqTd)

21 CNN pus

Posted by: Roy at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (NOfHY)

22 That correlates to about $40K revenue per month. Subtract broadcast and equipment costs, and they can almost pay for Chris's makeup each month.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (5kI0z)

23 How long before Chris Wallace becomes Chris Who?

Who are you?

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (eGTCV)

24 7 They just aren't doing enough to focus marketing efforts on their core target audience: empty seats in airport terminals.

Posted by: Anotheranon at April 12, 2022 02:13 PM (8Ze5j)


I'm fairly certain that my one aunt is a subscriber.

She crazee

Posted by: kallisto at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (DJFLF)

25 Aw man, read the thread. Coulda been a contenda.

Posted by: Sassy at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (xSICi)

26 Maybe they should start a product where you pay to NOT have to see anything from CNN any more.

Posted by: She Hobbit at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (ftFVW)

27 Poor Chris Wallace. Lol.

Posted by: redridinghood at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (NpAcC)

28 Chris Wallace will be Brian Stelters new beard.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (GwxCX)

29 hiya

Posted by: JT at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (arJlL)

30 The environment is flooded with leftwing news sources.

Why the hell would you pay for a new one?

Posted by: 18-1 at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (ESjRY)

31 great comment roy, i added it to the post

Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (0G13K)

32 CNN+ needs moar GAY!

Posted by: gourmand du jour at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (jTmQV)

33 The new company's leadership team still has yet to decide the ultimate fate of CNN+. CNN's new boss, Chris Licht, will start May 1.
______________

Welcome aboard, Chris! You were born too late for the Titanic, or the Hindenburg, but OTOH, you got CNN+.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (YqDXo)

34 People will pay for stuff they won't watch for free. What a great business concept!

Posted by: Shooter McGavin at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (GLkOQ)

35 This just has to work. There is no other way for people to get their news. I mean news streams are just so hard to find. Lol. So sad to see Chris Wallace go out like this.

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (rjpjQ)

36 CNN+ because you deserve to be lied to today about the things most people won't get lied to about until tomorrow.

Posted by: 18-1 at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (ESjRY)

37 >34 People will pay for stuff they won't watch for free. What a great business concept!
Posted by: Shooter McGavin at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (GLkOQ)

This has the stink of McKinnsey or Accenture all over it.

Posted by: Havy Meta at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (gryET)

38 10k active. How many "solidarity" (read: pity) sign-ups did they get from people who don't use it and don't want to?

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (DU+/6)

39 I'd like to see the math they used to come up with 2 million paid subscribers for content they can barely give away today.

Posted by: JackStraw at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (ZLI7S)

40 So many choices of shit not to watch.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (Y5qcH)

41 Honestly, I am surprised it is 10k. I suspect those numbers are buffed.

Also, dammit ace, you willowed me!

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (dNqv+)

42 Jordan Peterson releases a youtube vid, it generates about 10k views/minute.
Posted by: kallisto at April 12, 2022 02:11 PM (DJFLF)


Bernadette Banner, who makes videos about sewing, probably gets more views per day than CNN.

Posted by: Colorado Alex in Exile at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (wmDcS)

43 Also, those 10k people? They are unfixable.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (DU+/6)

44 I demand a recount. 10,000 seems too high for those stooges.

Posted by: a.moron at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (tu3iY)

45 PROFIT!

Posted by: Underpants Gnomes at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (rjpjQ)

46 Subway shooter is a disgruntled CNN+ subscriber.

Posted by: CZ = FNG To Remain Silent Because, FNG at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (MkuC5)

47 34 People will pay for stuff they won't watch for free. What a great business concept!
Posted by: Shooter McGavin at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (GLkOQ)
-----
They make it up on volume.

Posted by: Weasel at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (0IeYL)

48 This reminds me of that lefty radio network back in the '90s ("Air America"? That doesn't sound right), and of Alec Baldwin trying to be a radio talk show host. Heh, heh, heh.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (txdEq)

49 Of course, those 10k unfixable people might not be people. Thousands of them could be business accounts for some reason.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (DU+/6)

50 Are five hours of Tater daily really in the works?

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (eGTCV)

51 Enjoy your hiatus, Ace !

But don't get a hiatus hernia.

Posted by: JT at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (arJlL)

52 This has the stink of McKinnsey or Accenture all over it.
Posted by: Havy Meta at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (gryET)


I believe that McKinsey was cited in an article as having done the original projections.

Posted by: Colorado Alex in Exile at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (wmDcS)

53 Willowed, but I think important:
578 553 Really makes you want to live in a big city in giant apartment blocks, doesn't it?

All those chinese people should just take up their firearms and cause a revolt.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 12, 2022 02:10 PM (lgeFv)

Yeah, if it was really that bad, people would do something, right?
-actual argument heard in college about Stalinist Soviet Union

also:
-"But, they're Kulaks"
-this one was relayed to me by a TA in a Russia at War class when the prof was going off on 'Dekulakization' and the Holodomor. Rabinowich was an absent minded dude, but he was not amused.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (dNqv+)

54 Good news for CNN. They syndicated old episodes of the Chevy Chase Show.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (hyqTd)

55 Michael Mann could really big dog these people - 10,000? Chump change!

Posted by: Indignacio Vindacatorem at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (oWBc3)

56 NYT Worst-Sellers list: "Career Advice," by Chris Wallace.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (YqDXo)

57 Wallace is a douche. Did someone say that already?

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (FAxhf)

58 We are not fake news, Mr. President!

Narrator Voice: They were.

Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (TaMzF)

59 No, wait, I was right about the name, wrong about the time:

"Air America (formerly Air America Radio and Air America Media) was an American radio network specializing in progressive talk radio. It was on the air from March 2004 to January 2010."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (txdEq)

60 I just paid for the local public access PLUS upgrade. Next week the school lunch menu is offering fish sticks. I know this because I am a public access plus member.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (GwxCX)

61 Dear Mr Wallace

I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I offer good vibes and thou.......

HAHAHAHAH HAHAHAHAH HAHAHA

Go suck a dead dog dick ya prune faced jerk wad! You got what you deserved!

Regards
Mayhem

Posted by: Madamemayhem (uppity wench) at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (Vxu+H)

62 42 Jordan Peterson releases a youtube vid, it generates about 10k views/minute.
Posted by: kallisto at April 12, 2022 02:11 PM (DJFLF)

Bernadette Banner, who makes videos about sewing, probably gets more views per day than CNN.
Posted by: Colorado Alex in Exile at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (wmDcS)

Those white noise/asmr videos get crazy number of views.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (dNqv+)

63 Closed News Network. Potato out front shoulda told ya.

[files nails]

Posted by: John Candy's understudy, Ana Navarro at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (32x3R)

64 Ha ha.

F you, CNN Minus.

Posted by: Deplorable Ian Galt at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (sIwG8)

65 This is the reason Stacy Abrams shot up a NYC subway.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (lgeFv)

66 "10 C N Ent. Viewers get to watch trees grow.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at April 12, 2022 02:13 PM (hyqTd) "

LOL ! We gotta early contendah for threadwinnah here !

Posted by: sock_rat_eez -gaslighted?, more like napalmed at April 12, 2022 02:18 PM (enSii)

67 >>>Also, dammit ace, you willowed me!


i willowed myself too

Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 02:19 PM (0G13K)

68 OT: NY Gov. Hochul appointed Brian Benjamin as her Lt. Gov. last year. He was arrested today for campaign finance shenanigans and bribery charges.

Shocking.

Posted by: Cheri at April 12, 2022 02:19 PM (oiNtH)

69 If CNN+ wants to survive it is going to have to think outside of the box.

Dancing tranny boys

Interviewing spherical Guatemalans from when they get on the US paid for bus in their home town until they cash their first welfare check in Chicago

Ukrainian grandmothers that have destroyed Russian tanks with perogis

People dying in the hospital wishing they got the clot shot.

Posted by: 18-1 at April 12, 2022 02:19 PM (ESjRY)

70 43 Also, those 10k people? They are unfixable.
____________

They just wanna date me!

Posted by: Chris Wallace at April 12, 2022 02:19 PM (k4dH2)

71 39 I'd like to see the math they used to come up with 2 million paid subscribers for content they can barely give away today.
Posted by: JackStraw at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (ZLI7S)

Why pay for propaganda when so much is for free? I know Chris Wallace can start a YouTube channel.

Posted by: Underpants Gnomes at April 12, 2022 02:19 PM (rjpjQ)

72 How many Chevy Chase episodes were there? 5 or 6?

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 12, 2022 02:19 PM (AGz39)

73 Enjoy your hiatus, Ace !

But don't get a hiatus hernia.
Posted by: JT at April 12, 2022


***
Who is Atus, and why should we say Hi to him?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:19 PM (txdEq)

74 For the article below, I read the headline "Gunman Dons Mask", etc. as "*Grandma* Dons Mask".

Made the story a lot more interesting.

Posted by: Mrs. Peel at April 12, 2022 02:19 PM (Hpwyl)

75 CNN the Ocho

Posted by: Dr. Varno at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (vuisn)

76 But don't get a hiatus hernia.

Posted by: JT at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (arJlL)

I got that. What the hell is he doing on his time off?

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (FAxhf)

77 They make it up on volume.
Posted by: Weasel

"Our TOP STORY TONIGHT, " - Garret Morris

Posted by: JT at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (arJlL)

78 Yeah that's enough to pay for the catering. Good lord. Who the hell projected 2 million people would sign up to see Tater 4 hours a day???

The stories out of CNN are hilarious, everyone is sending out resumes, and not little people, but big time anchors and execs. Almost a dozen major execs are bailing already knowing they are going to be shown the door by a company that wants to do real news, not their propaganda crap.

The guy in charge of Discovery called Tater a "cancer" on television. CNN is going to be detonated, and I cannot be happier about it.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (KZzsI)

79 >>i willowed myself too

Where's garrett when you need him. This is right in his wheelhouse.

Posted by: JackStraw at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (ZLI7S)

80 i willowed myself too
Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 02:19 PM (0G13K)

What you do with your furry member is your affair.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (dNqv+)

81 So they have less subscribers than a youtube dude doing videos about Skyrim mods.

Posted by: Dave in Fla at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (TJXo1)

82 Details: CNN executives, with help from consulting firm McKinsey, originally expected to bring in around 2 million subscribers in the U.S. in the service's first year and 15-18 million after four years.


Not a good look for McKinsey.

Posted by: mr tmz at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (rJ48h)

83 Is CNN+ just a tax scheme or accounting ploy? I can't even begin to fathom the business model for this service. Did CNN really think that millions of people would start paying to see programming they were already not watching when it was free? Nobody could be that stupid. Could they? Well . . . it is CNN.

Posted by: Elric Blade at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (iFTx/)

84 I'm so sick of hearing "people familiar with the matter" as sources. It's such a cheese dick phrase.

If I was a journalizmist I would only use "a dude who, like, literally, knows everything".

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (Y5qcH)

85 Wallace looks like he should be spending his day sitting on a park bench in the sunshine while farting constantly.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (eGTCV)

86 Who is Atus, and why should we say Hi to him?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:19 PM

Jacks brother, duh.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (GwxCX)

87 CNN: The most Trucked up Beaches in the News.

Posted by: James Moore at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (Ipvql)

88 This has the stink of McKinsey or Accenture all over it.
Posted by: Havy Meta at April 12, 2022 02:16 PM (gryET)
_______________

Management consulting is the biggest legal scam in existence. It is a pons asinorum for managers, most of whom flunk the test.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:21 PM (YqDXo)

89 #LearnToRunLemonadeStand

Posted by: Curly Shuffle at April 12, 2022 02:21 PM (TNyrE)

90 CNN+ was a crappy business model to begin with.. like it has been said before one cable channel of propaganda will do it just fine. There are three network propaganda stations as well. If the CEOs couldn't see this coming then they truly believe the BS they are peddling and market demand for it. Or, they were coerced into doing it or promised to be made whole financially thru other means.

Posted by: Silent at April 12, 2022 02:21 PM (CrU4U)

91 CNN+ line up of shows was basically "all the crap we usually try to run on HLN but gets canceled after 2 weeks" and tons of Tater, I just cannot imagine who that's a draw for.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:21 PM (KZzsI)

92 85 Wallace looks like he should be spending his day sitting on a park bench in the sunshine while farting constantly.
Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (eGTCV)

He could replace Martin mull as the host of Fernwood tonight

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at April 12, 2022 02:22 PM (rjpjQ)

93 Wallace was on Colbert the other night. I was able to hum a happy tune and go vape for most of it.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:22 PM (dNqv+)

94 -"But, they're Kulaks"
-this one was relayed to me by a TA in a Russia at War class when the prof was going off on 'Dekulakization' and the Holodomor. Rabinowich was an absent minded dude, but he was not amused.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:17 PM (dNqv+)


I am happy to report that in the class I teach here in ignorant hick Arkansas, all the students were able to figure out that the Russian Revolution did in fact murder people, and that was not in fact okay.

Posted by: Dr. T at April 12, 2022 02:22 PM (bhRsz)

95 Didn't Magic Johnson have a show for a few weeks?

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 12, 2022 02:22 PM (gZgHO)

96 Is CNN+ just a tax scheme or accounting ploy? I can't even begin to fathom the business model for this service.
Posted by: Elric Blade at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (iFTx/)
______________

Ever watch "The Producers?"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:22 PM (YqDXo)

97 8 hour videos of squirrels feeding get more views than CNN+

Posted by: Dave in Fla at April 12, 2022 02:22 PM (TJXo1)

98 Restoring Casio Keyboards: niche
CNN Plus: Very Niche


What if the Eagles Carried Frodo? Niche
CNN Plus: Very Niche


Tips for electric guitar busking: Niche
CNN Plus: Very Niche

Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 12, 2022 02:22 PM (44ww/)

99 "For comparison, David French's wife has 40,000 users per day and she's totally uncute."

Betweenz hers ands Mrs. Kristolls, I do's get a workout. Of course I AMZ TEH PAOLO!

Posted by: Teh Paolo at April 12, 2022 02:22 PM (/7oeZ)

100 CNN Plus Was "Projected" to Garner 2 Million Subscribers In Its First Year

They shouldn't have used Democrat pollsters to make the forecasts.

Posted by: The ARC of History! at April 12, 2022 02:22 PM (I2/tG)

101 Who is Atus, and why should we say Hi to him?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:19 PM

Jacks brother, duh.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (GwxCXOk,

that was a push. be better Minn.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (FAxhf)

102 Subway shooter was a guy that was triggered by a sidewalk advertising TV having Foxnews on.

Posted by: Silent at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (CrU4U)

103 Kinda hard to make money from your traditional "captive audience" (cable package bundling, airports) when you try to execute a pure subscription model on the same pap content, but warmed over, lulz. That they even entertained the idea, much less launched it, shows that they're living in a bubble of their own farts.

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (YNyZ9)

104 93 Wallace was on Colbert the other night. I was able to hum a happy tune and go vape for most of it.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:22 PM (dNqv+)

====

What's Colbert?

Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (Nxqta)

105 I am happy to report that in the class I teach here in ignorant hick Arkansas, all the students were able to figure out that the Russian Revolution did in fact murder people, and that was not in fact okay.
Posted by: Dr. T at April 12, 2022 02:22 PM (bhRsz)

Good to know. This was in Bloomington in the 90's. And even most of the students were taken aback by this stupid shit.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (dNqv+)

106 CNN+ was a crappy business model to begin with.

Yeah it has a real dot.com boom vibe to it, Streaming is the NEXT BIG THING AND WE'LL MAKE BILLIONS! Um, not with this crap product, and everyone should expect a streaming implosion soon as some of the 9053412 streaming services start to shut down for lack of profit.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (KZzsI)

107 Applying Pareto's Principle from the previous thread, 80% of CNN execs are inumerate dumbass cocksuckers, and 20% are jerking off under their desks.

OK, that's not exactly Pareto, but whatevs.

Posted by: Meade Lux Lewis, Domestic Terrorist at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (sWM8x)

108 For comparison, David French's wife has 40,000 users per day and she's totally uncute.

====

Primo cruel.

10/10

Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (Nxqta)

109 What's Colbert?
Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (Nxqta)

$20, same as in town.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (dNqv+)

110 They're hoping to hear from Elon Musk.

Posted by: Eeyore at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (R0Tis)

111 stop, stop, my shadenboner just passed neptune...

Posted by: SturmToddler (8D42x) at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (WhsXQ)

112 I hate those glasses Wallace wears. Is there an optometrist to douchebags store?

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (eGTCV)

113 He could replace Martin mull as the host of Fernwood tonight
Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless

Wow, there is a blast from the past.

Posted by: Infidel at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (AhBAQ)

114 Chrissie Wallace is the literal poster child for Dick-Face Syndrome.

I'm sure Muldoon knows the ICD-10 Code for that ...

Posted by: ShainS -- They are Child Predators, not Groomers at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (Emy6L)

115 Fat, Trump-deranged and stupid is no way to go through life young man.

Posted by: Dean Wormer at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (OzNIz)

116 Can't they mandate that public school kids in K-3 watch this? It is slightly better than trans ed.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (5kI0z)

117 Magic Johnson had a show until all his aids quit.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (AGz39)

118 Note to self: Don't hire McKinsey Marketing.

Seriously, does cnn itself even have 2 million viewers?

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (lgeFv)

119 TED NUGENT Endorses DR. OZ For U.S. Senate In Pennsylvania

Posted by: Mark1971 at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (xPl2J)

120 It's like how all the subscription to newspapers saved the newspaper industry.

You want my CNN+ actual profitable model?

An actual CNN+: All the raw footage, even the live newsroom, unedited, and commercial breaks.

Notice how what would sell is what they wouldn't dare offer?

Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (TaMzF)

121 Ya know, those dudes at CNN should ask themselves; 'why do they hate us?'

Or is introspection only something to shove off on other people when something bad happens to them?

I will have to ponder this subject deeply for an answer.

Posted by: William F. 'Buck' Dharma at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (oedLL)

122 But our models and projections, based on market surveys and in-depth research, clearly showed that there was undulating, pulsating demand for our subscription product.

Reality must be wrong!

Posted by: CNN Business Development Department at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (4I/2K)

123 He could replace Martin mull as the host of Fernwood tonight

Mull was at least kinda funny

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (KZzsI)

124 97 8 hour videos of squirrels feeding get more views than CNN+
__________

Makes sense. At least squirrels are kinda cute and occasionally interesting, which can't be said of anybody on CNN or CNN+

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (k4dH2)

125 Not a good look for McKinsey.

Don't worry, we make so much money sucking up to the Chinese government that we'll hardly even notice this!

Posted by: McKinsey! at April 12, 2022 02:24 PM (I2/tG)

126 What's Colbert?

Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (Nxqta)

*obligatory*

$20, same as in town.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM (FAxhf)

127 CNN Plus Was "Projected" to Garner 2 Million Subscribers In Its First Year

Can you imagine not trying to explode with laughter in that board meeting? Their top rated show doesn't clear any hurdles and they thought someone would pay more for that pap? GTFO and LOL. Dumbasses.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM (GwxCX)

128 75 CNN the Ocho

Posted by: Dr. Varno at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (vuisn) [/]

CNN the Minus.

"Tonight on the Minus, Chris Wallace and a puppet show". (Check local listings).

Posted by: a.moron at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM (tu3iY)

129
You're looking at this all wrong, guys...

First of all, another way to put this is that a lot of people - 10,000 of them! - have signed up and watch *every single day.* That's evidence of a huge untapped demand for objective news, untainted by Trumpist bias or revolting Slavic maggot-men from that horrid Russia.

I mean, how many people do you even know? 100? 200? We're talking about *10,000 people* here.

Secondly, this is only 200x less than initially projected. Not some huge shortfall. As usual, CNN might not get it totally right - nobody can - but we got damned close. Everyone just needs to take a breath.

Posted by: Butterball Powerbottom at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM (SKVme)

130 CNN+ should go populist, like in anchorman, showing squirrels on skis and car chases, what do they have to lose?

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM (gZgHO)

131 Bad day for NY.

Lt Gov arrested today on federal corruption charges.

Posted by: JackStraw at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM (ZLI7S)

132 Is Earl Camembert available?

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM (eGTCV)

133 " TED NUGENT Endorses DR. OZ For U.S. Senate In Pennsylvania"

Doctor, doctor, please!

Posted by: Phil Mogg and the rest of the guys from UFO at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM (oedLL)

134 Yeah, 10k viewers is a low-mid tier YouTuber.

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 12, 2022 02:26 PM (YNyZ9)

135 Not a good look for McKinsey.

Two words:

Pete. Buttigieg.

That's the kind of geniuses we have working for us!

Posted by: McKinsey! at April 12, 2022 02:26 PM (I2/tG)

136 I like how ACE is coy about his numbers but I'm pretty sure he pulls in more than 10k on average a day.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:26 PM (KZzsI)

137 I'm no math surgeon but at the rate their going, rather then spend $1 billion they could just pay each of their subscribers $3 million to not use the service, shut it down, and save money. I should run a media business.

Posted by: scofflaw_x at April 12, 2022 02:26 PM (iwWEr)

138 I bet those lab puppy streams I linked a month or so ago got a LOT more traffic.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:26 PM (dNqv+)

139 Wallace was on Colbert the other night. I was able to hum a happy tune and go vape for most of it.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022
====
What's Colbert?
Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022


***
A kind of cheese, I think.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:26 PM (txdEq)

140 Doomy Russian Vapor-synth: Niche
CNN Plus: Very Niche

Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 12, 2022 02:26 PM (44ww/)

141 I'm just sort of amazed that this could have ever been thought a good idea. I would think that any minimal level of research would have revealed that there was no market for this and it was never going to fly. The fact that people like Wallace jumped ship thinking this was a good idea, coupled with management thinking it was a good idea to launch just leaves me scratching my head. The only explanation is they really are totally and completely out of touch with normal Americans. I know we kind of joke about it, but it is kind of scary at the same time. These people think they are the elite?

Posted by: moon_over_vermont at April 12, 2022 02:26 PM (CcBZe)

142 CNN the Minus.

"Tonight on the Minus, Chris Wallace and a puppet show". (Check local listings).

Posted by: a.moron at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM (tu3iY)

I'd pay to watch the puppet beat him to death with a stick.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at April 12, 2022 02:26 PM (FAxhf)

143
Lt Gov arrested today on federal corruption charges.


You want Gov Aztec Priestess arrested

You'll settle for the Lt Gov getting frog marched.

You'll get...wait we got...something?

Posted by: 18-1 at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (ESjRY)

144 In other sad news, Rachel Maddow announces she will only be doing her MSNBC show 1 night a week.

Posted by: redridinghood at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (NpAcC)

145 131 Bad day for NY.

Lt Gov arrested today on federal corruption charges.
Posted by: JackStraw at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM (ZLI7S

====

That made me chuckle. Appointed by new gov last year, too.

If there was a NY GOP, they'd make hay of it.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (Nxqta)

146 You have to love their business model.


'Tim Pool does a show from his basement and gets 50,000 views per hour. We can put professional liars behind a camera and spout DNC talking points and do 100 times as much. We can make millions.'

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (5kI0z)

147 Subway shooter was a guy that was triggered by a sidewalk advertising TV having Foxnews on.
Posted by: Silent at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM

Word is that he also had a hockey stick.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (GwxCX)

148 AT&T bought TimeWarner to build their market cap by adding "content provider" to their resume.

It was all handled badly. The cultures of the companies did not fit. And AT&T wanted to see some streaming sub revenue - HBOMAX mostly was bundled with AT&T wireless and DTV subs. And they forced big pictures onto HBOMAX (like WW84) at the same time as theaters and broke their revenue model there. I don't think that CNN thought CNN+ was going to be awesome, I think AT&T did. And now as they are transitioning to Discover networks all the skeletons are coming out.

Posted by: blaster at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (9otr5)

149 James Earl Jones did the voice for CNN early on. Maybe Peewee Herman could be the voice of CNN+.

Posted by: Beartooth at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (+3ARs)

150 Cnn dies. Was that on 2022 bingo cards?

Posted by: USNtakim deplorable still. at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (0OmEj)

151 Is Earl Camembert available?

I'd pay to watch a news show with him on it. Him and Floyd were the best anchors on television, dammit!

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (KZzsI)

152 Alternate names:

CNN Onus, Anus, Flatus.

Posted by: Joe Mama at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (WmGrA)

153 Pro tip for CNN+: broadcast a webcam showing the Safeway trucks getting unloaded.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (YqDXo)

154 100 CNN Plus Was "Projected" to Garner 2 Million Subscribers In Its First Year

They shouldn't have used Democrat pollsters to make the forecasts.
_____________

LOL.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at April 12, 2022 02:28 PM (k4dH2)

155 >125 Not a good look for McKinsey.

Hey we just gave you your strategy. You fucked up the execution. Oh, and we had to increase our billable hour rate. Please have accounts payable cut our check.

Posted by: McKinsey Flak at April 12, 2022 02:28 PM (gryET)

156 Posted by: Phil Mogg and the rest of the guys from UFO at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM

I saw UFO in 1995 when Schenker came back. One of the best shows I've ever been to.

Posted by: Mark1971 at April 12, 2022 02:28 PM (xPl2J)

157 CNN plus is hampster dance 2.0

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:28 PM (GwxCX)

158 To help them stay informed, the regime will be handing out CNN+ subscriptions to the new flood of illegals along with their Obama phone. That should help the numbers.

Posted by: Ripley at April 12, 2022 02:28 PM (MxEKc)

159 Is CNN+ anything like LGBTQI+? Plus mean packaged with sex toys?

Posted by: Dr. Bone at April 12, 2022 02:28 PM (Wnd0C)

160 >The guy in charge of Discovery called Tater a "cancer" on television. CNN is going to be detonated, and I cannot be happier about it.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:20 PM (KZzsI)

But who are they going to gain as viewers? I guess some of the mushy moderate Republicans. But I bet no one here will trust that they will be a "straight news" org going forward. Also, by moving to the center, they stand to lose a bunch of consoomers of Daily Hate Programming to MSNBC.

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 12, 2022 02:28 PM (YNyZ9)

161 Colbert is a type of cheese.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM (44ww/)

162 I like the "news clip" idea. Roku already shows news clips from something called Newsy. Real short news blurbs that are supposed to appeal to short attention spans or something, and they are hilarious because they have no context. "A Cuban man was found floating in the water. Authorities say he is uninjured." CNN+ will have to compete with that.

Posted by: scofflaw_x at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM (iwWEr)

163 SMOD? https://tinyurl.com/y72qo5rj

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM (gZgHO)

164 AT&T bought TimeWarner to build their market cap by adding "content provider" to their resume.

It was all handled badly. The cultures of the companies did not fit. And AT&T wanted to see some streaming sub revenue - HBOMAX mostly was bundled with AT&T wireless and DTV subs. And they forced big pictures onto HBOMAX (like WW84) at the same time as theaters and broke their revenue model there. I don't think that CNN thought CNN+ was going to be awesome, I think AT&T did. And now as they are transitioning to Discover networks all the skeletons are coming out.

Posted by: blaster at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (9otr5)
____________

AT&T is a strong candidate for being the worst run company in existence. Especially now that Enron is no more.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM (YqDXo)

165 153 Pro tip for CNN+: broadcast a webcam showing the Safeway trucks getting unloaded.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM (YqDXo)

Bring in Amouranth with a shake weight (this one baffles me, she is not that hot for a bottle redhead and her tits do not move- because, fake. And I am usually enhancement agnostic.)

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM (dNqv+)

166 Somehow CNN+ will be a delightful tax right off for someone or some company.

Posted by: Seems Legit at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM (DcKNO)

167 We had beautiful, animated, 8-color powerpoint decks and everything! Waaah!

Posted by: CNN Business Development Department at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM (4I/2K)

168 @147 "Subway shooter was a guy that was triggered by a sidewalk advertising TV having Foxnews on.
Posted by: Silent at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM

Word is that he also had a hockey stick."

I heard he was pushed over the edge by lack of Putin condemnation among the GOP. Biden's doing a presser later to roll out his new Sedition Act.

Posted by: Zek at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM (OzNIz)

169 If they dropped all named anchors, dropped the brand CNN and loaded up with 20 people with 9-5 jobs to talk about current events (TMZ style) they would get to a million subscribers in a month.

Posted by: Bang-a-gong at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM (Qc+Wp)

170 James Earl Jones did the voice for CNN early on. Maybe Peewee Herman could be the voice of CNN+.
Posted by: Beartooth at April 12, 2022 02:27 PM

Yea, and saying. You paid for CNN plus and then doing his laugh, while jerking it next to Toobin.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (GwxCX)

171 TED NUGENT Endorses DR. OZ For U.S. Senate In Pennsylvania

When it comes to rock stars and politics, Alice Cooper had the right take, "...we're not smarter than anybody else. I mean, why do you think we're rock stars?"

Posted by: Blanco Basura - moronhorde.com. Not insurgents, counterrevolutionaries. at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (SchxB)

172 160 But who are they going to gain as viewers? I guess some of the mushy moderate Republicans. But I bet no one here will trust that they will be a "straight news" org going forward. Also, by moving to the center, they stand to lose a bunch of consoomers of Daily Hate Programming to MSNBC.
Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 12, 2022 02:28 PM (YNyZ9

====

The brand is broken. Shelve it forever. Use some of the capital investment to start a new news org. Keep the cameramen. Fire everyone else.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (Nxqta)

173 AT&T is a strong candidate for being the worst run company in existence. Especially now that Enron is no more.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM (YqDXo)

Disney is giving it a run for it's money.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (dNqv+)

174
20 10,000. That used to be a big crowd at Wrigley circa the Lee Elia era.
Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at April 12, 2022 02:15 PM (hyqTd)

***

Fran Allison used to pitch Wrigley Field "Don't stay cooped up at home. Come on out to the ballpark!"

In the 50s, the Cubs sometimes had 3,000 attendance. Poor, long-suffering Ernie Banks..

Posted by: JM in Florida at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (N/uCi)

175 But who are they going to gain as viewers? I guess some of the mushy moderate Republicans. But I bet no one here will trust that they will be a "straight news" org going forward.
_______________

There's only one way to get the stink off of CNN: they have to go hard right.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (YqDXo)

176 CNN Onus, Anus, Flatus.
Posted by: Joe Mama at April 12, 2022


***
"CNN, the onus is on you to protect your anus and control your flatus."

"Huh?"
(-- Tater and Chris Wallace in unison)

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (txdEq)

177 Die CNN Die

Posted by: Skip at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (2JoB8)

178 CNN Plus Was "Projected" to Garner 2 Million Subscribers In Its First Year

If that was the plan then it sounds like they should've given Gutfeld a bazillion dollars instead of Chrissy Wallace.

Posted by: Shooter McGavin at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (GLkOQ)

179 But I bet no one here will trust that they will be a "straight news" org going forward.

I am not really sure they can have a future, but there is an audience for cable news out there. They claim to plan on middle of the road news programming which we all know means leftist, but not as demented crazy leftist as they used to be.

But it really would not take much to distinguish themselves from broadcast news these days. EVERY station is crap.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (KZzsI)

180 CNN+ is the Air America of video streaming.

Posted by: ShainS -- They are Child Predators, not Groomers at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (Emy6L)

181 2 million viewers were not fortified.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (44ww/)

182 >>That made me chuckle. Appointed by new gov last year, too.

>>If there was a NY GOP, they'd make hay of it.

Some states are so far in the tank I don't see how they ever get out. When I lived in MA 3 Democrat House Speakers in a row were convicted of felony corruption charges.

The 4th was of course a Democrat as well.

Posted by: JackStraw at April 12, 2022 02:31 PM (ZLI7S)

183 Watching maggots hatch get more viewers than CNN.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at April 12, 2022 02:31 PM (Qhnrt)

184 In the 50s, the Cubs sometimes had 3,000 attendance. Poor, long-suffering Ernie Banks..
Posted by: JM in Florida at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (N/uCi)
____________

"Let's play ... none!"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:31 PM (YqDXo)

185 Panicked CNN Exec: We could expand into interplanetary space. We could call it CNN Uranus.

Posted by: Napoleon XIV at April 12, 2022 02:31 PM (AiZBA)

186 AT&T is a strong candidate for being the worst run company in existence. Especially now that Enron is no more.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM (YqDXo)


The billions of dollars they set on fire between DirectTV and Time Warner acquisitions (not to mention they just straight up had to give $4.5B to Sprint for an aborted takeover) is astonishing.

Posted by: blaster at April 12, 2022 02:31 PM (9otr5)

187

"Fewer than 10,000 people are using CNN+ on a daily basis two weeks into its existence, according to people familiar with the matter."

What are they using it for?

Promoting nausea from watching the drooling veggo Wallace spit all over with his liver lips?

Posted by: Dr.Rev. Senator Your Highness E Buzz Miller, Esq PhD MA MS at April 12, 2022 02:31 PM (7durp)

188 Colbert is a type of cheese.
Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 12, 2022 02:29 PM

True.

Fumunda.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:31 PM (GwxCX)

189 My local MLB franchise sucks, I mean its a bad organization, just here to be one of the washington generals of the MLB, and they get over 10,000 fans per game. That's how bad cnn minus is.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 12, 2022 02:31 PM (lgeFv)

190 But I bet no one here will trust that they will be a "straight news" org going forward.
Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 12, 2022 02:28 PM (YNyZ9)

News doesn't get straighter than this, buster.

Posted by: Don LeMon, Sniffing His Finger at April 12, 2022 02:32 PM (SKVme)

191 " help from consulting firm McKinsey"

You know who else was a McKinsey consultant? Our esteemed Secretary of Transsssportation, Pete 'What Me Worry?' Bootyjuice, that's who.

Real smart bunch, that crowd.

Posted by: William F. 'Buck' Dharma at April 12, 2022 02:32 PM (oedLL)

192 Even 2 million subscribers is barely enough to keep the lights on, with the salaries they pay and all. I don't see how they figured this was going to work out for them. You know Tater wanted 7 figures a year.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:32 PM (KZzsI)

193 So the first thing we have to do is get the narrative right

Then have somebody with the dimensions and appearance of a tire fire some heaters into our hq to get some sympathy and interest.

Then we start the will and Jada show

Posted by: Y5 at April 12, 2022 02:32 PM (H7I01)

194 Disney is giving it a run for it's money.

Posted by: Aetius451AD



Yes, AT&T is a hold, since they just dumped their broadcast. DIS is a short right now.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 12, 2022 02:32 PM (5kI0z)

195 130 CNN+ should go populist, like in anchorman, showing squirrels on skis and car chases, what do they have to lose?
Posted by: Dr Spank at April 12, 2022 02:25 PM (gZgHO)

They need to engage Mr. Mannix for assistance with the weather girls' wardrobe choices.

That'll probably be enough to save the whole venture.

Posted by: CZ = FNG To Remain Silent Because, FNG at April 12, 2022 02:32 PM (MkuC5)

196 >Doomy Russian Vapor-synth: Niche
CNN Plus: Very Niche
Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 12, 2022 02:26 PM (44ww/)

I bet Sovietwave is way more popular than CNN+.

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 12, 2022 02:32 PM (YNyZ9)

197 Alice Cooper had the right take, "...we're not smarter than anybody else. I mean, why do you think we're rock stars?"
Posted by: Blanco Basura - moronhorde.com. Not insurgents, counterrevolutionaries. at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (SchxB)


I don't know. I always though "money for nothing and your chicks for free" sounded pretty smart to me.

Posted by: moon_over_vermont at April 12, 2022 02:32 PM (CcBZe)

198 189 My local MLB franchise sucks, I mean its a bad organization, just here to be one of the washington generals of the MLB, and they get over 10,000 fans per game. That's how bad cnn minus is.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 12, 2022 02:31 PM (lgeFv)

====

LET'S GO OAKLAND!

Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:32 PM (Nxqta)

199 How much was it to subscribe to CNN+?

Posted by: Seems Legit at April 12, 2022 02:33 PM (DcKNO)

200 177 Die CNN Die

Posted by: Skip at April 12, 2022 02:30 PM (2JoB

---------

Faster, Pussyhat!

Posted by: ShainS -- They are Child Predators, not Groomers at April 12, 2022 02:33 PM (Emy6L)

201 Bring in Amouranth with a shake weight (this one baffles me, she is not that hot for a bottle redhead and her tits do not move- because, fake. And I am usually enhancement agnostic.)
Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022


***
Those are not the only fakes she's carrying around with her. And I don't mean her hair.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:33 PM (txdEq)

202 Watching maggots hatch get more viewers than CNN.
Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at April 12, 2022 02:31 PM (Qhnrt)

When I was 9 it was always exciting finding a dead, maggot-ridden animal in the woods.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 12, 2022 02:33 PM (eGTCV)

203 I don't know. I always though "money for nothing and your chicks for free" sounded pretty smart to me.

Go ask Alice.

Posted by: Blanco Basura - moronhorde.com. Not insurgents, counterrevolutionaries. at April 12, 2022 02:33 PM (SchxB)

204 If Tater, Wallace and Cavuto started a band they could call it Weaselpenis.

Posted by: Zek at April 12, 2022 02:33 PM (OzNIz)

205 It can become the Gorilla Channel that Trump always watched /s

Posted by: McCool at April 12, 2022 02:33 PM (BqBIh)

206
Certainly
Not
Netflix

Posted by: ... at April 12, 2022 02:33 PM (etl9f)

207 Fire the staff who failed to position Brian Stelter for success.

Posted by: MikeN at April 12, 2022 02:33 PM (o/eHL)

208 You know Tater wanted 7 figures a year.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:32 PM (KZzsI)

His personal trainer was adamant the one he already has is sufficiently disgusting.

Posted by: CZ = FNG To Remain Silent Because, FNG at April 12, 2022 02:33 PM (MkuC5)

209 If that was the plan then it sounds like they should've given Gutfeld a bazillion dollars instead of Chrissy Wallace.
________

I wonder if his contract guarantees him his millions regardless of whether or not the platform fails. Probably does, since everything else the CNN execs have done is stupid.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at April 12, 2022 02:33 PM (k4dH2)

210 If you need me to pull rank, I could command my thousands of Twitter followers to sign up. For a small fee, of course.

Posted by: Perfesser Michael Mann at April 12, 2022 02:34 PM (GLkOQ)

211 Nugent has endorsed Romney in the past. Evidently Cat Scratch Fever affects the large head as well.

Posted by: Indignacio Vindacatorem at April 12, 2022 02:34 PM (oWBc3)

212 So of this is right then the thing to do is for the network to start aishq+ , the hq has way more users evert day

Posted by: Y5 at April 12, 2022 02:34 PM (H7I01)

213 Applying Pareto's Principle from the previous thread, 80% of CNN execs are inumerate dumbass cocksuckers, and 20% are jerking off under their desks.

OK, that's not exactly Pareto, but whatevs.
Posted by: Meade Lux Lewis, Domestic Terrorist at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (sWM8x)


Realistically, it's probably something like 80% of views come from 20% of their subscriber base. So 10,000 unique views a day means about 40,000 subscribers total.

Posted by: Colorado Alex in Exile at April 12, 2022 02:34 PM (wmDcS)

214 It's Lubin The Toobin 8 hours a day. And a monkey eating another monkeys poo. And Chris Wallace.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:34 PM (GwxCX)

215 Fewer than 10,000 people are using CNN+ on a daily basis two weeks into its existence, according to people familiar with the matter.

---------------

Fewer or less?

Posted by: SH (Overturn Roe) at April 12, 2022 02:34 PM (sX1BW)

216 CNN will pay airports to give out CNN Minus for free, as a marketing campaign.

Posted by: MikeN at April 12, 2022 02:34 PM (o/eHL)

217 Usually, when your flagship operation is steadily loosing viewers its not a smart thing to do a spinoff. The only industry I know of where this might work is resturant chains.

Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 02:34 PM (2graF)

218

If Low-T Wallace, nepot moron, would have just asked Joe why he had to drop out of running for Pres previously he would have such a better rep.

Instead, he's just another smarmy douchebag like Goldturd.

Posted by: Dr.Rev. Senator Your Highness E Buzz Miller, Esq PhD MA MS at April 12, 2022 02:34 PM (7durp)

219 Run the numbers again!

Posted by: CNN Business Development Department at April 12, 2022 02:34 PM (4I/2K)

220 Comparison:
Golden Retriever Meets Puppies for the First Time
https://tinyurl.com/bdhzkzev

37,624,090 views in 6 months. Their 'rounding difference' is greater than the views of CNN+.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:35 PM (dNqv+)

221 Details: CNN executives, with help from consulting firm McKinsey, originally expected to bring in around 2 million subscribers in the U.S. in the service's first year and 15-18 million after four years.

Not a good look for McKinsey.
Posted by: mr tmz

They're failing upwards! It's a hip thing.

Posted by: Bozo Conservative.....lost in a lost world at April 12, 2022 02:35 PM (vcOmj)

222 c++ > CNN+

Posted by: Chuck C at April 12, 2022 02:35 PM (EughT)

223 216 CNN will pay airports to give out CNN Minus for free, as a marketing campaign.
-------------------
In a world of smartphones and laptops Public TeeVees are noise.

Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 02:35 PM (2graF)

224 "Bracing for layoffs" sounds so dirty.

Posted by: JuJuBee at April 12, 2022 02:35 PM (Ex67w)

225 Tony Fauci and the CDC just issued new covid requirements. Americans are now expected to watch CNN Plus a minimum of two hours per day.

For full immunization, a minimum of one of those hours must be watching Tater.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Break The Teachers Unions at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (uL2Yf)

226 "I saw UFO in 1995 when Schenker came back. One of the best shows I've ever been to."

Michael Schenker is top of my list for unsung guitar heros. Man, can that guy play.

Posted by: William F. 'Buck' Dharma at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (oedLL)

227 New Coke was more successful than this.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (5kI0z)

228 f# > CNN

Posted by: CZ = FNG To Remain Silent Because, FNG at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (MkuC5)

229 The only industry I know of where this might work is resturant chains.

unwise expansion is one of the number one ways a business commits suicide. "We did great this year, let's open 10 new stores!"

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (KZzsI)

230 Not a good look for McKinsey.

----------------

Every good consultant loads there report with assumptions as well as some suggestions that they can turn to when their expertise doesn't work out as hoped.

Posted by: SH (Overturn Roe) at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (sX1BW)

231 They thought, "Hey! With Brandon's 81 million votes we're bound to have a big interest base."

Posted by: Beto Ochoa at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (dzZCL)

232 Consider, given the recency of its launch, that the true number of CNN+ subs is in the *hundreds*, and nowhere close to 10,000. Promo account codes were given out generously, we can assume, likely to other media who would amplify CNN+ content in some way or maybe to the growing number of former Kamala Harris staffers.

Posted by: mercury at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (l7rT0)

233 People who watch Tater for five hours a day would be at risk of Tater poisoning.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (eGTCV)

234 It isn't CNN+'s fault.. it is the viewers fault for not realizing what an amazing job they are doing.

Posted by: Silent at April 12, 2022 02:37 PM (CrU4U)

235 Comparison:
Golden Retriever Meets Puppies for the First Time
https://tinyurl.com/bdhzkzev

37,624,090 views in 6 months. Their 'rounding difference' is greater than the views of CNN+.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:35 PM

Well yeah, Golden Retrievers are smarter than CNN executives.

Posted by: Beartooth at April 12, 2022 02:37 PM (+3ARs)

236 227 New Coke was more successful than this.
Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (5kI0z)

'2 Girls, 1 Cup' scoffs at CNN+ (and probably offered better commentary.)

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:37 PM (dNqv+)

237 226 "I saw UFO in 1995 when Schenker came back. One of the best shows I've ever been to."

Michael Schenker is top of my list for unsung guitar heros. Man, can that guy play.
Posted by: William F. 'Buck' Dharma at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (oedLL)

I still think "Captain Nemo" is one of the best driving songs there is.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (vuisn)

238 Every good consultant loads there report with assumptions as well as some suggestions that they can turn to when their expertise doesn't work out as hoped.

Yeah I'm thinking this is worse than they can CYA with technical claims in the contract.

"Look uh, you could attract as much as 2 million! OR 10k. You know either way, really."

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (KZzsI)

239 " help from consulting firm McKinsey"

You know who else was a McKinsey consultant? Our esteemed Secretary of Transsssportation, Pete 'What Me Worry?' Bootyjuice, that's who.
_____________

In industry I got tips on running research from a 22 year old management consultant chick (at $300/hr) with a bachelor's degree in chemistry. It turned out that I'd literally published more research papers than she had ever read. But that was easy, because she'd never read a paper in the primary literature, as I ascertained by questioning her.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (YqDXo)

240 It's ok, America is not a big streaming country, just like Boston is not a big college town.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (5kI0z)

241 I won't be the first to say this but.....

I hope they all..... Learn to Code!!!!

Posted by: Ironwolf32 at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (Rh1+5)

242 Fewer than 10,000 people are using CNN+ on a daily basis two weeks into its existence, according to people familiar with the matter.

---------------

Fewer or less?
Posted by: SH (Overturn Roe) at April 12, 2022


***
The grammar rule is, if it's a number you could *reasonably* count, then use "fewer." Thus, "Fewer kittens were adopted last month in Dubuque," but "There's less sugar spilled on the floor than I thought." 10K is a pretty big number -- so maybe "Less than 10,000 people."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (txdEq)

243 More perverts: Disney+ or CNN+?

Posted by: SH (Overturn Roe) at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (sX1BW)

244 Details: CNN executives, with help from consulting firm McKinsey, originally expected to bring in around 2 million subscribers in the U.S. in the service's first year and 15-18 million after four years.

Did they get a written report detailing how this was all going to come about? Having been forced by upper management to use McKinsey, once, still waiting on the written report as a deliverable...from twenty plus years ago. Talk about a grift/graft, plus they helped in the Enron fiasco...

Posted by: Ganowicz Commie Exterminators, LTD. at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (/7oeZ)

245 The new motto. "CNN+! We're becoming more selective!!"

Posted by: Shooter McGavin at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (GLkOQ)

246 The humanoid carbon-based life-form* who wrote and presented the business plan for the creation of CNN+ just attended a Board of Directors meeting where he said:

"Hey, guys, I know CNN+ isn't hitting its marks as I predicted, but I have a GREAT solution!: We stop airing "regular" CNN, and that'll force all our millions of viewers onto the paid platform! Whattaya think?"

The Board, consisting of imbeciles, is pondering this new strategery.



*Possibly the only inoffensive way to describe a human being nowadays.

Posted by: Sharkman at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (ET441)

247 I perdict CNN is the first Nazo-Commie news network to go full Watergate on The Biden Crime family in an attempt to salvage themselves from certain failure.

Posted by: CZ = FNG To Remain Silent Because, FNG at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (MkuC5)

248 I know of failed MMORPGs that have more viewers on Twitch than CNN-.

Posted by: Inspector Cussword at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (nC+QA)

249 Um, look, if we built this large wooden badger...
... we could call it CNN Ultimate+

Posted by: Sir Bedevere, McKinsey Consultant at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (4I/2K)

250 Fewer or less?

Fewer in number but lesser people.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (KZzsI)

251 102 Subway shooter was a guy that was triggered by a sidewalk advertising TV having Foxnews on.
Posted by: Silent at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (CrU4U)

He saw the Fnords.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (vuisn)

252 Wow Ace is posting feel good story of the day early today!

Posted by: keena at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (6eCpD)

253 Every good consultant loads there report with assumptions as well as some suggestions that they can turn to when their expertise doesn't work out as hoped.
______________

If the company is centralized, decentralize it. If it's decentralized, centralize it.

In either case, draw up an org chart, and get new spiffier name plates on the office doors.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (YqDXo)

254
How many airport lounge areas are there worldwide? 10,000?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (pNxlR)

255 Well yeah, Golden Retrievers are smarter than CNN executives.
Posted by: Beartooth at April 12, 2022


***
Maine Coon cats have more self respect than CNN executives.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (txdEq)

256 Want to see Chris Wallace homeless on the street in NYC.

Posted by: Mr Gaga at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (KiBMU)

257 The "headline" subscription numbers are or course deflated this month. But of course the rolling average of six month's subscriptions is the better metric, which you would know if you'd read today's briefing.

Posted by: Jen Psaki (D-Hell) at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (OzNIz)

258 Comparison:
Golden Retriever Meets Puppies for the First Time
https://tinyurl.com/bdhzkzev

37,624,090 views in 6 months. Their 'rounding difference' is greater than the views of CNN+.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:35 PM (dNqv+)

Unfair. Everyone loves puppies.
No one loves CNN.
No even Golden Retrievers love CNN.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (XvPQV)

259 242 The grammar rule is, if it's a number you could *reasonably* count, then use "fewer." Thus, "Fewer kittens were adopted last month in Dubuque," but "There's less sugar spilled on the floor than I thought." 10K is a pretty big number -- so maybe "Less than 10,000 people."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (txdEq)

===

Countable vs non-countable nouns.

2 fewer apples. Less milk. 2 fewer gallons of milk.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:40 PM (Nxqta)

260 Ted Nugent is a dumbass. I rarely criticize him because I usually agree with him, but he's a dumbass.

Posted by: Meade Lux Lewis, Domestic Terrorist at April 12, 2022 02:40 PM (sWM8x)

261

If they program more gorillas I'd watch all day long!

Posted by: OrangeMan at April 12, 2022 02:40 PM (hYLGm)

262 I know of failed MMORPGs that have more viewers on Twitch than CNN-

No, seriously, EverQuest has more active subscribers than that.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:40 PM (KZzsI)

263 After ATT took over DIRECTV they stopped giving out incentives to keep existing customers. When I threatened to cancel, they told me to go ahead. So I did.

Now they beg me to come back every week and they dress up their junk mail in all kinds of disguises - bills, Christmas cards, notes from long lost friends.

I'm sure they were trying to pull some "new subscriber" shit for their idiot stakeholders but I wonder after six years of Failed Christmas Cards how that worked out for them.

Posted by: ... at April 12, 2022 02:40 PM (etl9f)

264 Want to see Chris Wallace homeless on the street in NYC.
Posted by: Mr Gaga at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM

Turn those machines back on!

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:40 PM (GwxCX)

265 I perdict CNN is the first Nazo-Commie news network to go full Watergate on The Biden Crime family in an attempt to salvage themselves from certain failure.

Posted by: CZ



One would think that all of the people there would realize that this is the only way to salvage their paychecks, but I imagine that their party is more important than their paycheck. They can always get a job in the vice presidential office - there are plenty of openings.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 12, 2022 02:41 PM (5kI0z)

266 New Coke was more successful than this.
Posted by: Thomas Paine


That stuff hurt my nose.

Wait? What?

Posted by: Bozo Conservative.....lost in a lost world at April 12, 2022 02:41 PM (vcOmj)

267 I don't know how Chris Wallace didn't realize his move was incredibly dumb. Couldn't have happened to a more deserving person.

Posted by: chique l'African Viking Math Queen King of Greenland, the Merciless (don't/stop/believin') at April 12, 2022 02:41 PM (rF64X)

268
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (txdEq)

It's whether you're talking about discrete units or not.

"Less sugar was spilled..."

"Fewer than 10,000 grains of sugar were spilled..."

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 12, 2022 02:41 PM (SKVme)

269 Well yeah, Golden Retrievers are smarter than CNN executives.
Posted by: Beartooth at April 12, 2022
***
Maine Coon cats have more self respect than CNN executives.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022


***
Oops. I meant to write, "Weasels have more self-respect than CNN executives."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:41 PM (txdEq)

270 Was it announced that Piss Wallet's contract is a six-figure guarantee? Or should we assume he's being paid a salary?

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 12, 2022 02:41 PM (p6Md5)

271 "I haven't gotten a business review on what CNN+ is going to be and how it's going to be offered," Zaslav said at the time.

At least with a crappy newspaper you can line a bird cage

Posted by: Bruce at April 12, 2022 02:41 PM (vd8XM)

272 248 I know of failed MMORPGs that have more viewers on Twitch than CNN-.
Posted by: Inspector Cussword at April 12, 2022 02:38 PM (nC+QA)

Remember New World?

Question: So the WOW Killer- so long sought and hoped for- turned out to be... Blizzard employees?

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:41 PM (dNqv+)

273 Seven

Figure

Tater

Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (44ww/)

274 Subway shooter was a guy that was triggered by a sidewalk advertising TV having Foxnews on.
Posted by: Silent at April 12, 2022 02:23 PM (CrU4U)

He saw the Fnords.
Posted by: Dr. Varno at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (vuisn)

Wait until he sees the new Oldsmobiles

(And yes, I got the ref)

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (XvPQV)

275 An observation... the next generation will only get their entertainment from YouTube. It is constantly new. My kids haven't streamed our other services in a long time. When they talk about their shows, it is YouTubers. Hollywood cant compete. It is almost dead but doesn't know it yet.

Posted by: Sassy at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (xSICi)

276 Well yeah, Golden Retrievers are smarter than CNN executives.
Posted by: Beartooth at April 12, 2022 02:37 PM (+3ARs)


Another thing Goldens are smarter than is: "Former astronaut Scott Kelly launches 1st NFT, with sales supporting Ukraine"

He's auctioning off some "artwork" NFTs. One of them is him in a gorilla suit while floating in the space station cuppola with Bizzaro world earth in the background.

https://www.space.com/ astronaut-scott-kelly-nft-space-artwork-ukraine

space between .com/ and astonaut

Posted by: Napoleon XIV at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (AiZBA)

277 Hopefully I will be able to get CNN+ to play on my Zune.

Posted by: ChockyChockyChip at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (ufJfM)

278 I was so glad when Chrissy Pissy Pants left Fox. I can't stand his nasal elf voice and he is a sucker of cock.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (GwxCX)

279 263 After ATT took over DIRECTV they stopped giving out incentives to keep existing customers. When I threatened to cancel, they told me to go ahead. So I did.

I called them up to find out why I ordered a 4k receiver but wasn't getting 4k service.

They wanted an absurd sum to upgrade.

I canceled them on the spot.

Posted by: CZ = FNG To Remain Silent Because, FNG at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (MkuC5)

280 My old boss did shit tons of contract work for AT&T. The amount of money they piss away is staggering.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (AGz39)

281 CNNdouble+good coming soon. Nekkid Tater doing weather reports.

Posted by: JuJuBee at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (Ex67w)

282 Most CNN subscribers are public places not people

Posted by: Skip at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (2JoB8)

283 >>>The grammar rule is, if it's a number you could *reasonably* count, then use "fewer." Thus, "Fewer kittens were adopted last month in Dubuque," but "There's less sugar spilled on the floor than I thought." 10K is a pretty big number -- so maybe "Less than 10,000 people."

I don't remember "Reasonably" being part of that rule. I thought countable just meant a collection of discrete units and uncountable was a mass you quantify by, well, mass or volume. Fewer people but less water. Fewer blood cells but less blood.

Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (0G13K)

284 LET'S GO OAKLAND!
----
I think Moneyball is a good film.

Posted by: Dave in Fla at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (zq4nm)

285
New Coke was more successful than this.
Posted by: Thomas Paine


And its spokesperv did prison time! Dare we hope?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (pNxlR)

286 >Maine Coon cats have more self respect than CNN executives.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (txdEq)

And they groom their own dingleberries out of their fur.

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (YNyZ9)

287 256 Want to see Chris Wallace homeless on the street in NYC.
Posted by: Mr Gaga at April 12, 2022 02:39 PM (KiBMU)

You people are the reason my Chrissie left that ickky Fox News Network! Mean. Cruel even.

Posted by: Chris Wallace's Mom at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (PiwSw)

288 So just how many is "fewer than 10,000"? Last I checked, 0 is less than 10,000. I doubt they'll break even in *checks watch* 4 Uranus-years. Tater could get more clicks with an Only Fans channel. Maybe Zucker would sign up.

Posted by: Drink Like Vikings at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (Sb/5y)

289 I just read that Congress has been investigating the financial irregularities of Washington Commanders ownet Dan Snyder. Why would that be Congress business and when will they start on the Biden family?

Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh. at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (eGTCV)

290 fuck piss wallace

Posted by: rhennigantx at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM (yrol0)

291 In fairness, the sharks happen youtube channel has more viewers

Posted by: Y5 at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM (H7I01)

292 Fewer grains of sand but less sand.

The distinction there is that you are specifying "grains" which can, in theory, be counted.

Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM (0G13K)

293 284 LET'S GO OAKLAND!
----
I think Moneyball is a good film.
Posted by: Dave in Fla at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (zq4nm)

===

One of the best films of the decade.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM (Nxqta)

294 Subway shooter had just taken a government paid-for Uber from the White Plains airport, where he had landed in a stealth flight from Harlingen TX at 2:30 a.m.

He was escorted from the plane to the Uber, by guys wearing spiffy outfits and baseball caps, nice haircuts, and no facial hair. One of them handed him a gym bag before he was helped into the Uber.

Posted by: Mr Gaga at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM (KiBMU)

295 One of my favorite YouTube channels, Guga Foods, released a video about deep frying steaks in pepperoni oil four hours ago.

It has 140,000 views

Posted by: Masaryk at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM (NW/3w)

296 Hollywood cant compete. It is almost dead but doesn't know it yet.

They are severely bubbled there, even the smart ones don't grok how big podcasts etc are. Its like radio guys unaware how popular TV became. They really think that someone who stars in a network TV show is bigger than, like Joe Rogan. They do not comprehend how fast and completely things have changed because they all still talk the same language, watch the same shows etc.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM (KZzsI)

297 >>> Also, those 10k people? They are unfixable.

Based on the polls coming in, I am sure the venn diagram of CNN minus subscribers and white college educated woman are almost a full circle.

Posted by: LizLem at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM (+mkOR)

298 This grammar lesson is sounding suspiciously like a math lesson.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM (UuD2k)

299 282 Most CNN subscribers are public places not people
---
Ooo...hadn't thought of that.

Posted by: Meade Lux Lewis, Domestic Terrorist at April 12, 2022 02:44 PM (sWM8x)

300 He was escorted from the plane to the Uber, by guys wearing spiffy outfits and baseball caps, nice haircuts, and no facial hair. One of them handed him a gym bag before he was helped into the Uber.
Posted by: Mr Gaga at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM

So he just snuck in from Mexico then.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:44 PM (GwxCX)

301 Seems likely Chris Wallace will be back this year. He can't stay on the sidelines of an historic election cycle and he'll be a full-throated partisan jackwad on CNN, with more people pointing at him and laughing than watching his show.

Posted by: Onewhoknows at April 12, 2022 02:44 PM (WweVH)

302 One of the best films of the decade.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM (Nxqta)

You wanna bet on a guy fucking an alligator- Moneyplane!
-Frasier

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:44 PM (dNqv+)

303 I think Moneyball is a good film.

It really was. I hate the philosophy they built the team around and all that stat stuff but the movie was very well made and acted, great film.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:44 PM (KZzsI)

304 AT&T is a strong candidate for being the worst run company in existence. Especially now that Enron is no more.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara
----------------------------
Most conglomerates are poorly run and would not be surprised that ATT will follow the same path as ITT did.

Posted by: whig at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (Iq9dF)

305 Someone forgot to position CNN+ for success.

But I bet the marketing dept. will get most of the blame.

Posted by: GnuBreed at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (F0YaR)

306 292 Fewer grains of sand but less sand.

The distinction there is that you are specifying "grains" which can, in theory, be counted.
Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 02:43 PM (0G13K

====

Grains are a countable noun in English. Sand is not countable.

I had to teach a whole lesson just on this idea when I taught English as a foreign language.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (Nxqta)

307

Tank Abrams has more OnlyFans subscribers than that...

Posted by: My Pimp Shot My Dealer at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (hYLGm)

308 Fewer blood cells but less blood.

Posted by: ace

More dollars but less money.

Posted by: Miklos, in the Bitem Economy at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (QzkSJ)

309
Diapered and shirtless Tater, wearing a bonnet, sucking on a binky -- CNN+Baby!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (pNxlR)

310 fewer viewers but less of an audience

"audience" there a collective noun, a mass

Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (0G13K)

311 I thought countable just meant a collection of discrete units and uncountable was a mass you quantify by, well, mass or volume. Fewer people but less water. Fewer blood cells but less blood.

----------------

Let me see if I have this right...

Tater has fewer hair follicles than a normal man, a boat displaces less water than he (she) does.

Posted by: SH (Overturn Roe) at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (sX1BW)

312 >>>More dollars but less money.


by jove i think she's got it!

Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (0G13K)

313 I suspect that there is a sector of the market that picks up every new show/channel that comes out, like hotels etc so they offer everything to customers, but that doesn't mean the shows are watched.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (KZzsI)

314 Tank Abrams has more OnlyFans subscribers than that...
Posted by: My Pimp Shot My Dealer at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM

And stomach folds.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (GwxCX)

315 10k actual subscribers!?!!?
They should use bot farms like the rest of us.

Posted by: Truth Social at April 12, 2022 02:45 PM (FsXsF)

316 The grammar rule is, if it's a number you could *reasonably* count, then use "fewer."
__________

Shorter version: discrete variables vs. continuous ones.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (YqDXo)

317 I had to teach a whole lesson just on this idea when I taught English as a foreign language.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone

It was tough.

Posted by: Kummala at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (QzkSJ)

318 12 >>>More dollars but less money.


by jove i think she's got it!

wait no

fewer dollars but less money

i guess for more you say "more" in both cases

Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (0G13K)

319 Are we going philosophical?

More boobs, but fewer Epic Racks.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (dNqv+)

320 Maine Coon cats have more self respect than CNN executives.
-------------------
This is true. Maine Coon Cats rule.

Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (2graF)

321 Gobbled up so many treats / Ate 'em all, took my chances / Went the distance, now I can't see my feet / Half a man with the hunger of five

So many times, it happens too fast / You crack a toilet for glory / Don't lose your grip on the meals gone past / You must fight just to keep them inside

It's the Eye of the Tater, it's the millionth bite / Bulkin' up to the weight of a freighter / And the fat, sweaty beta snacks again in the night / And he's watchin' us all... with the Eye of the Tater

Posted by: Brian Stelter's Workout Mixtape at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (SKVme)

322 Joe Rogan is a former actor who talks about all kinds of mundane things, and gets a hundred million views.

Chris Wallace is a 40 year executive newsman, who knows everyone in every corridor of power, and gets some fraction of 10,000 viewers.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (5kI0z)

323 No, seriously, EverQuest has more active subscribers than that.
----
Asherons Call had more subs than that, and Warner Bros killed it.

Posted by: Dave in Fla at April 12, 2022 02:47 PM (zq4nm)

324 Grains are a countable noun in English. Sand is not countable.

Yeah, sometimes English does make common sense. Not often, mind you.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:47 PM (KZzsI)

325 I just read that Congress has been investigating the financial irregularities of Washington Commanders ownet Dan Snyder. Why would that be Congress business and when will they start on the Biden family?
Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh.


The point being to force Snyder to sell the team to a "minority" (non-white) ownership person or group. Because they want white people out of public life, and eventually dead.
Maybe Brian Stelter, Chris Wallace, Don LeMon and some other CNN Know it All will buy it.

Posted by: Bozo Conservative.....lost in a lost world at April 12, 2022 02:47 PM (vcOmj)

326 267 I don't know how Chris Wallace didn't realize his move was incredibly dumb. Couldn't have happened to a more deserving person.
___________

Depends on the terms of his contract. If he gets paid regardless of whether CNN+ fails, then he'll be getting millions for doing nothing, which isn't a bad deal for him.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at April 12, 2022 02:47 PM (k4dH2)

327 I think Moneyball is a good film.
Posted by: Dave in Fla at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (zq4nm)

Unlike Money Plane, staring some ex-WWE wrassler dood.

Money quote from "Money Plane" from Kelsey Grammer:
"Whatever you want to wager on, the Money Plane has you covered. You want to bet on a dude fucking an alligator? Money Plane."

Posted by: Thrawn at April 12, 2022 02:47 PM (Rl7KJ)

328 Doesn't Pixy post about million-subscriber Hololive feeds? So watching Japanese girls play Minecraft is 100x better than CNN+

Actually, that still seems low by a couple orders of magnitude.

Posted by: mikeski at April 12, 2022 02:47 PM (KYxzy)

329 316 The grammar rule is, if it's a number you could *reasonably* count, then use "fewer."
__________

Shorter version: discrete variables vs. continuous ones.
-----------
Wow, the shit is getting heavy here today. I need a bong hit.

Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 02:47 PM (2graF)

330 324 Grains are a countable noun in English. Sand is not countable.

Yeah, sometimes English does make common sense. Not often, mind you.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:47 PM (KZzsI)

===

I was assured by my Italian students that it was the same in Italian.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison's Phone, read some movie thoughts at April 12, 2022 02:47 PM (Nxqta)

331
If the first ones given the old heave-ho aren't the jabbering jackasses that were talking up this abomination, then expect more of these launch and slip beneath the waves operations.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (PgFwl)

332 I'm still LMAO that they thought people would pay for CNN.

Posted by: Venus at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (YVBLw)

333 Dave "Iowahawk" Burge noted that a Twitter post he put up about farting got just under 30,000 views, vs. CNN+'s 10,000 daily viewers.

Posted by: Ian S. at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (ZGrMX)

334 On the right slope of the bell curve, there are fewer but greater penises.

Posted by: Sandra Fluke at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (4I/2K)

335 The ads on social media for CNN - are all over the place. I'm sure they're getting a sweet deal on those, maybe even for free in some cases, but the ridicule is a tasty reminder of how much respect was lost for that shit show.

Maybe they need to sell some coffee mugs... ones that change color or show a hidden picture when warm. Of Chrissy Wallace with tears streaming down his jowled cheeks.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (BFigT)

336 I think even a lowly part-time COB like myself probably has more eyeballs reading my content on the Sunday Morning Book Thread...

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (YIVH2)

337 I think Moneyball is a good film.

---------------

Its historical baseball accuracy leaves a lot to be desired. But the actors are all great.

Posted by: SH (Overturn Roe) at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (sX1BW)

338 More dollars but less money.


by jove i think she's got it!
Posted by: ace

Uh-oh


I'm getting the Garrett Treatment

Posted by: Miklos has a pee-pee at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (QzkSJ)

339 Illustration on my last comment (bonus for the Leg 'Rons):

https://tinyurl.com/2p97p3m5

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (dNqv+)

340 Shorter version: discrete variables vs. continuous ones.

Teacher can I go home? My brain is full

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (KZzsI)

341 I got that. What the hell is he doing on his time off?

Posted by: Cannibal Bob




GAINZZZZZZ

Posted by: Sharkman at April 12, 2022 02:49 PM (ET441)

342 I wish someone would pay me for my bad predictions. And I would do it for a lot less money.

Posted by: washrivergal at April 12, 2022 02:49 PM (VGZ9M)

343 243 More perverts: Disney+ or CNN+?

Posted by: SH
----------------
Per 1000 subscribers--CNN+, raw numbers Disney+.

Posted by: whig at April 12, 2022 02:49 PM (Iq9dF)

344 Damn, it's looking like All Elite Wrestling is the Crown Jewel of the Time Warner family.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper at April 12, 2022 02:49 PM (HJcWr)

345 339 Illustration on my last comment (bonus for the Leg 'Rons):

https://tinyurl.com/2p97p3m5
Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (dNqv+)

Dem Slavic thighs...

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM (XvPQV)

346 One of the best films of the decade.
---
Speaking of Prometheus, I watched "The Outfit" last night. Really good film.

Posted by: Meade Lux Lewis, Domestic Terrorist at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM (sWM8x)

347 I done told ya back then:

A Few Dollars More.

Posted by: Blondie at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM (4I/2K)

348 So, I looked up Netflix to compare to CNN+...I must be doing something wrong b/c apparently, Netflix subscribers watch Netflix an average of 3.2 hours PER DAY!

Then I did think that if families have a service, every person isn't watching that much, but kids and grandparents might be doing the bulk of the viewing and parents watching 1-2 tv episodes or movies a week...

https://backlinko.com/netflix-users

Posted by: Nova local at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM (exHjb)

349 280 My old boss did shit tons of contract work for AT&T. The amount of money they piss away is staggering.
Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (AGz39

If you want a real shock, work for the federal government.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM (Qhnrt)

350 Loved the Eye of the Tater song, by the way, fun stuff

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM (KZzsI)

351 267 I don't know how Chris Wallace didn't realize his move was incredibly dumb. Couldn't have happened to a more deserving person.
Posted by: chique l'African Viking Math Queen King of Greenland, the Merciless (don't/stop/believin') at April 12, 2022 02:41 PM (rF64X)
_______________

I suspect Wallace was getting the push from Fox, so "any port in a storm" applies.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM (YqDXo)

352 The grammar rule is, if it's a number you could *reasonably* count, then use "fewer." Thus, "Fewer kittens were adopted last month in Dubuque," but "There's less sugar spilled on the floor than I thought." 10K is a pretty big number -- so maybe "Less than 10,000 people."
*
I don't remember "Reasonably" being part of that rule. I thought countable just meant a collection of discrete units and uncountable was a mass you quantify by, well, mass or volume. Fewer people but less water. Fewer blood cells but less blood.

Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022


***
I think that word is actually in the Strunk & White Elements of Style for this item. I'm not 100% sure.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM (txdEq)

353 Uh-oh

I'm getting the Garrett Treatment

Posted by: Miklos has a pee-pee

We all want to be as funny and witty as Garrett, but...

Never go full Garrett.

Posted by: Bozo Conservative.....lost in a lost world at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM (vcOmj)

354 Doesn't Pixy post about million-subscriber Hololive feeds? So watching Japanese girls play Minecraft is 100x better than CNN+

Actually, that still seems low by a couple orders of magnitude.
Posted by: mikesk

Imagine the numbers if the Japanese girls were not pixelated.

Posted by: Truth Social at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM (FsXsF)

355 344 Damn, it's looking like All Elite Wrestling is the Crown Jewel of the Time Warner family.
Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper at April 12, 2022 02:49 PM (HJcWr)

I'd say it's The Suicide Squad.

Though that's a savage cut, props

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 12, 2022 02:51 PM (XvPQV)

356 Netflix subscribers watch Netflix an average of 3.2 hours PER DAY!

Probably the average person watches like half an hour but there's mega users who are binging entire seasons of shows every day.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:51 PM (KZzsI)

357 Fun Fact:

CNN+ is streaming off of a server physically located next to Hillary Clinton's commode.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at April 12, 2022 02:51 PM (Wnd0C)

358
There are youtube live streams that get more viewers in the 3-5 hours they're live. Rekieta Law has 11.4K viewers for the Depp/Herd lawsuit. Live now:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xdq4aPt1kcw

"defamation and defecation trial of the century"

*giggles*

Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie at April 12, 2022 02:51 PM (1hM1d)

359 > 339 Illustration on my last comment (bonus for the Leg 'Rons):

https://tinyurl.com/2p97p3m5
Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 02:48 PM (dNqv+)



Daaaaaaaaaaamn Gina.

Posted by: Muad'dib at April 12, 2022 02:51 PM (sjdRT)

360 CNN+ had two weeks to flatten the curve, but that didn't work either.

Posted by: Lex at April 12, 2022 02:51 PM (hjJh7)

361 112 I hate those glasses Wallace wears. Is there an optometrist to douchebags store?

It's named Cronkites Walter Wear

Posted by: bigG at April 12, 2022 02:51 PM (9tuKL)

362 This is true. Maine Coon Cats rule.
Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (2graF)

So true! I miss my Maine Coon Kitties.

Posted by: Ganowicz Commie Exterminators, LTD. at April 12, 2022 02:52 PM (/7oeZ)

363 Depends on the terms of his contract. If he gets paid regardless of whether CNN+ fails, then he'll be getting millions for doing nothing, which isn't a bad deal for him.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer--FJB at April 12, 2022 02:47 PM

Yep, as much as I'd like to See Piss Wallace selling pencils I think he'll be fine. But what will kill him is his ego. You can tell he's an egotistical prick and it's got to gall him that he will be a test pattern.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:52 PM (GwxCX)

364 325 I just read that Congress has been investigating the financial irregularities of Washington Commanders ownet Dan Snyder. Why would that be Congress business and when will they start on the Biden family?
Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh.


The point being to force Snyder to sell the team to a "minority" (non-white) ownership person or group. Because they want white people out of public life, and eventually dead.
Maybe Brian Stelter, Chris Wallace, Don LeMon and some other CNN Know it All will buy it.
Posted by: Bozo Conservative.....lost in a lost world at April 12, 2022 02:47 PM (vcOmj)

Bezos is behind it all. The WaPo has been spinning all kinds of stories and been a mouthpiece for the Dems in Congress in hopes that the NFL will force Snyder to sell it to Bezos.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper at April 12, 2022 02:53 PM (HJcWr)

365 321
Posted by: Brian Stelter's Workout Mixtape at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (SKVme)
Posted by: Brian Stelter's Workout Mixtape at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (SKVme)

LOL

Posted by: Miss Issippi at April 12, 2022 02:53 PM (sI15f)

366 Year Warner Bros is making some major changes.

The panicking about losing all the time and how the evil seems to always get away with it is usually overstated and pessimistic.

It takes time, but the bad guys always lose in the end. Sometimes it takes decades, but they always go down, and then face the ultimate price. Its just a matter of being courageous and keeping the faith especially in the darkest hours.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:53 PM (KZzsI)

367 add to 361: it conveys "Gravitas" to the wearer

Posted by: bigG at April 12, 2022 02:53 PM (9tuKL)

368 Oh no! I'll starve to death at this rate.

Posted by: Tater at April 12, 2022 02:53 PM (FsXsF)

369

YOU MISERABLE BITCHES!!!!
BRIAN, GIVE ME A REACH AROUND!

Posted by: Piss Wallace at April 12, 2022 02:53 PM (hYLGm)

370 $300-million advertising spent to acquire 10,000 viewers works out to $30,000 per viewer.

That's better than minimum wage: they could've paid those viewers directly at a much lower rate.

Posted by: LCMS Rulz! at April 12, 2022 02:53 PM (K58O6)

371 So Dan Rather, Chris Wallace, and Keith Olbermann walk into a bar . . .

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 12, 2022 02:54 PM (4I/2K)

372 I just read that Congress has been investigating the financial irregularities of Washington Commanders owner Dan Snyder. Why would that be Congress business and when will they start on the Biden family?
Posted by: N.L. Urker, oops, I commented again. Sorry, eh.
______________

Washington Commanders? Should've called the Washington Wankers.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:54 PM (YqDXo)

373 CNN+ is Tater's nickname in watercooler conversations.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at April 12, 2022 02:54 PM (ppBhU)

374 $300-million advertising spent to acquire 10,000 viewers works out to $30,000 per viewer.

That's better than minimum wage: they could've paid those viewers directly at a much lower rate.
Posted by: LCMS Rulz! at April 12, 2022 02:53 PM (K58O6)


It's genius compared to !Jeb!.

Posted by: Napoleon XIV at April 12, 2022 02:54 PM (AiZBA)

375 So true! I miss my Maine Coon Kitties.

I bet you don't miss burning out several lint rollers a day though

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (KZzsI)

376 In cost cutting moves, CNN announced that Chris Wallace will have to share a dressing room with Jeffrey Toobin.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (GwxCX)

377 I just read that Congress has been investigating the financial irregularities of Washington Commanders owner Dan Snyder. Why would that be Congress business and when will they start on the Biden family?

------------------

No group of people know financial irregularities more than Congress.

Posted by: SH (Overturn Roe) at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (sX1BW)

378 I suspect Wallace was getting the push from Fox, so "any port in a storm" applies.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM (YqDXo)

One thing Fox should have gotten from Wallace in his final contract was a 'no disparagement' clause - a tight one that last 2 years after termination. Because this mouthy little douche loves trashing his former bosses - not cool.

Posted by: Boswell at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (5iUNf)

379 Ace, I found the original Strunk text online. For "less":

"Less refers to quantity, fewer to number. 'His troubles are less than mine' means 'His troubles are not so great as mine.' 'His troubles are fewer than mine' means 'His troubles are not so numerous as mine.' It is, however, correct to say, 'The signers of the petition were less than a hundred,' where the round number a hundred is something like a collective noun, and less is thought of as meaning a less quantity or amount."

So I'm still confused as to what Strunk meant. In either case we're right as to usage.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (txdEq)

380 Ha! Learn to crochet bastards!

Posted by: Archer at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (gmo/4)

381 The whole less/fewer thing is for erudite and not so erudite people to feel good about themselves. My theory on language is if it's reasonable enough to derive and communicate meaning without losing anything significant, then it's generally fine to write or say.

I tell people I'm feeling good even when I mean well all the time. It's retarded IMO to insist we can't say that so that someone can feel smart.

Posted by: ... at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (etl9f)

382 362 This is true. Maine Coon Cats rule.
Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (2graF)

So true! I miss my Maine Coon Kitties.
Posted by: Ganowicz Commie Exterminators, LTD. at April 12, 2022 02:52 PM

'Tis true. Miss all my Maine Coon and Maine Coonish tomcats

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (Qhnrt)

383 Maybe Chris Wallace could go over to MSNBC. He and Joy Reid could do a show together. The Chris and Joy Hour of Power!! What could go wrong?

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (sAmhv)

384 362 This is true. Maine Coon Cats rule.
Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (2graF)

So true! I miss my Maine Coon Kitties.
----------------
I was looking for a Maine Coon to adopt to streamline Big Fat Cat and then Pouncer was offered by the contractor's working on our office. She was basically four weeks old and fit into one hand. Being an easy mark I took her home. She is long legged and sleek with a long monkey tail. She is always starts something by Pouncing - thus Pouncer. Pouncer keeps Big Fat Cat on her toes.

Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 02:56 PM (2graF)

385 So Dan Rather, Chris Wallace, and Keith Olbermann walk into a bar . . .
Posted by: Count de Monet at April 12, 2022 02:54 PM

For male stripper night.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:56 PM (GwxCX)

386 CNN Fewer

Posted by: ... at April 12, 2022 02:56 PM (etl9f)

387 Holy shit, Depp's sister is also his manager.

She would have to book an extra room for Depp when he and Heard were travelling, so that he could run to this room if they had an argument.

That is messed up.


Posted by: Deplorable Ian Galt at April 12, 2022 02:56 PM (MbgOb)

388 Washington Commanders? Should've called the Washington Wankers.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:54 PM (YqDXo)

***

That team has lost AT LEAST 1/2 of their fan base with their moves over the last 3 years... Maybe more.

Posted by: Truck Monkey Report at April 12, 2022 02:56 PM (flINI)

389 "Less refers to quantity, fewer to number. 'His troubles are less than mine' means 'His troubles are not so great as mine.' 'His troubles are fewer than mine' means 'His troubles are not so numerous as mine.' It is, however, correct to say, 'The signers of the petition were less than a hundred,' where the round number a hundred is something like a collective noun, and less is thought of as meaning a less quantity or amount."

So I'm still confused as to what Strunk meant. In either case we're right as to usage.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (txdEq)


Teaching *this* to ESL students?

Posted by: Napoleon XIV at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (AiZBA)

390 This busty redhead? didn't help CNN meet their projections for the worthless streaming service:
https://is.gd/oiL5Tu

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (DU+/6)

391 Who thought CNN+ was a good idea? I mean, someone somewhere must have said "CNN for streaming, that's where the money goes."

I guess he was right about that, just wrong about the direction the money was going.

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (p+1gI)

392 The whole less/fewer thing is for erudite and not so erudite people to feel good about themselves. My theory on language is if it's reasonable enough to derive and communicate meaning without losing anything significant, then it's generally fine to write or say.

I tell people I'm feeling good even when I mean well all the time. It's retarded IMO to insist we can't say that so that someone can feel smart.

---------------

Do you mean the Entire less/fewer ...?

Posted by: SH (Overturn Roe) at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (sX1BW)

393 So true! I miss my Maine Coon Kitties.
*
I bet you don't miss burning out several lint rollers a day though
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022


***
The longhaired cats I've known tend to leave clumps of fur on the carpet or furniture, easily scooped up with a brush. (Someone here called them tumbleweeds.) The shorthairs leave individual hairs that would need the lint roller treatment.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (txdEq)

394 Teaching *this* to ESL students?
Posted by: Napoleon XIV at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (AiZBA)
++++
Hell, if the ESL students can use less and fewer properly, they will have one up on most native speakers who went through public school...

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 02:58 PM (DU+/6)

395 I missed the last thread. Blue Oyster Cult has a song called "Morning Final" about a murder (shooting) that happened in a NYC subway station in 1976 near where the bass player (who wrote it) was staying. Fantastic tune.

Posted by: SFGoth at April 12, 2022 02:58 PM (KAi1n)

396 377 I just read that Congress has been investigating the financial irregularities of Washington Commanders owner Dan Snyder. Why would that be Congress business and when will they start on the Biden family?

Got to love when the Legislative Branch acts like the Judiciary Detectives.

This is what happens when Congress is full of senile old farts who no longer understand the concept of boundaries and do not comprehend staying in their lane.

Posted by: Miss Issippi at April 12, 2022 02:58 PM (sI15f)

397 388 Washington Commanders? Should've called the Washington Wankers.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:54 PM (YqDXo)

***

That team has lost AT LEAST 1/2 of their fan base with their moves over the last 3 years... Maybe more.
--------------
Yep. They just lost a number one draft pick to a five lane highway. Fortuneately, its the Steelers who lost the number one QB draft pick. Sometimes God favors idiots.

Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 02:59 PM (2graF)

398 https://is.gd/oiL5Tu
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (DU+/6)

I suddenly have a craving for a tall glass of milk.

Posted by: anchorbabe fashion cop at April 12, 2022 02:59 PM (MbgOb)

399 >390 This busty redhead? didn't help CNN meet their projections for the worthless streaming service:
https://is.gd/oiL5Tu

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (DU+/6)


Looks amazingly like my HS girlfriend.

Posted by: Muad'dib at April 12, 2022 02:59 PM (sjdRT)

400 Somewhere on YouTube there's probably an ASMR consisting of 10 hours of ambient room noise in a sheet metal factory that gets more than 10,000 views a day.

Posted by: Azathoth at April 12, 2022 02:59 PM (wb1YC)

401 Do you mean the Entire less/fewer ...?

Posted by: SH (Overturn Roe) at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (sX1BW)

I wish we had upvotes sometimes. But only sometimes.

Posted by: ... at April 12, 2022 03:00 PM (etl9f)

402 This busty redhead? didn't help CNN meet their projections for the worthless streaming service

She looks like she's about to bust out bawling

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 03:00 PM (KZzsI)

403 >>>CNN Plus Was "Projected" to Garner 2 Million Subscribers In Its First Year; Actual Current Users Per Day: Ten Thousand.

Amid all the bad news, this is a day-brightener!

Posted by: m at April 12, 2022 03:00 PM (4vwwZ)

404 376 In cost cutting moves, CNN announced that Chris Wallace will have to share a dressing room with Jeffrey Toobin.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (GwxCX)

--------

They could co-host their own show together: "Bate & Bitch."

Posted by: ShainS -- They are Child Predators, not Groomers at April 12, 2022 03:00 PM (Emy6L)

405 All this chitter-chatter, chitter-chatter, chitter-chatter about
Shmatta, shmatta, shmatta, I can't give it away on 7th Avenue.

Posted by: Tater Jagger at April 12, 2022 03:00 PM (Ndje9)

406 I'd say it's The Suicide Squad.

Though that's a savage cut, props
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 12, 2022 02:51 PM (XvPQV)

All Elite Wrestling averages about 1M viewers each week and is among the top shows in the 18-49 demo. For those 3 hours of TV per week Time Warner is paying about $50M a year. Time Warner is making BANK on those numbers.

The history of Turner Broadcasting was on the back of pro wrestling on TBS (WTBS and before that WTCG). The viewers from that allowed Turner to buy the Atlanta Braves and then air them on WTBS. The money from that launched CNN, and then Turner became Mr Cable.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper at April 12, 2022 03:00 PM (HJcWr)

407 CNN Sheet Metal Ambience

Posted by: ... at April 12, 2022 03:01 PM (etl9f)

408 390 This busty redhead? didn't help CNN meet their projections for the worthless streaming service:
https://is.gd/oiL5Tu
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (DU+/6)

My soul....

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 12, 2022 03:01 PM (XvPQV)

409
The Bowel Movement Network ...

STOP! JUST STOP!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 12, 2022 03:01 PM (pNxlR)

410 Wrasslin' used to be so big, I don't even know any of the names involved any more. Is the Undertaker still around?

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 03:01 PM (KZzsI)

411 This busty redhead? didn't help CNN meet their projections for the worthless streaming service:
https://is.gd/oiL5Tu
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!)

Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Stop looking at pretty young women!

Posted by: the short version at April 12, 2022 03:01 PM (FsXsF)

412 400 Somewhere on YouTube there's probably an ASMR consisting of 10 hours of ambient room noise in a sheet metal factory that gets more than 10,000 views a day.
Posted by: Azathoth at April 12, 2022 02:59 PM (wb1YC)

https://tinyurl.com/2p8njjd3

18,169,955 views (11 months)

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 03:01 PM (dNqv+)

413 396 377 I just read that Congress has been investigating the financial irregularities of Washington Commanders owner Dan Snyder. Why would that be Congress business and when will they start on the Biden family?

Got to love when the Legislative Branch acts like the Judiciary Detectives. This is what happens when Congress is full of senile old farts who no longer understand the concept of boundaries and do not comprehend staying in their lane. Posted by: Miss Issippi
------------------
FDR loved to go after his enemies, political and otherwise, via the IRS. Maybe an incoming president investigates all of Congress via the IRS with a special prosecutor. Trying to impeach the president for this would then could make for obstruction of justice charges against the Congress critters.

Posted by: whig at April 12, 2022 03:01 PM (Iq9dF)

414 I've been saying I didn't want another Siberian cat or a kitten, as the Siberians I've known have been prickly or sickly, and the last kitten I had (one of the Siberians) drove me nuts waking me up at 2 am to play. Yet here I am considering a new Siberian kitten from Chekov's breeder. When will I learn.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 03:02 PM (txdEq)

415 The distinction there is that you are specifying "grains" which can, in theory, be counted.
Posted by: ace
___

Pretty much what I was taught.

Guess that isn't taught anymore either.

Posted by: SMH at God's grace at April 12, 2022 03:02 PM (nXjQg)

416 Maybe they should get Shepard Smith on their channel.

That would fix it.

Posted by: Just Lily at April 12, 2022 03:02 PM (wbyiB)

417 They could co-host their own show together: "Bate & Bitch."
Posted by: ShainS -- They are Child Predators, not Groomers at April 12, 2022 03:00 PM (Emy6L)

*golfclap*

Posted by: Aetius451AD at April 12, 2022 03:02 PM (dNqv+)

418
So, I looked up Netflix to compare to CNN+...I must be doing something wrong b/c apparently, Netflix subscribers watch Netflix an average of 3.2 hours PER DAY!


Posted by: Nova local at April 12, 2022 02:50 PM


I know this may perhaps shock you but some people share their Netflix password with family members who do not live at the same location. In theory I could share my password with my daughter and her family in another state. But that would be wrong.

In actuality Netflix knows damn well this goes on. So in some countries they're going to offer a $2.99/month conscience cleaning option to see what happens. Seems fair to me.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at April 12, 2022 03:02 PM (dQvv7)

419 This is true. Maine Coon Cats rule.
Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 02:46 PM (2graF)

So true! I miss my Maine Coon Kitties.
Posted by: Ganowicz Commie Exterminators

MegaRoy says 'mmmmrrrpppp?'

Posted by: BifBewalski @ (UgAdJ) - at April 12, 2022 03:03 PM (UgAdJ)

420 All those people in Shanghai have been forced to stay in their apartments and care rumored to only get CNNPlus on their TV's. But CNN is totally independent of Chinese control.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Break The Teachers Unions at April 12, 2022 03:03 PM (nPSm+)

421 So Dan Rather, Chris Wallace, and Keith Olbermann walk into a bar . . .
Posted by: Count de Monet

For male stripper night.
Posted by: Minnfidel


That's some greater in quality messed up stuff, right there ...

Posted by: Adriane the Stage Fright Critic ... at April 12, 2022 03:03 PM (okV1R)

422
Turner became Mr Cable.


How can you overlook his seminal contributions during his time of service as Captain Planet?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 12, 2022 03:03 PM (pNxlR)

423 The history of Turner Broadcasting was on the back of pro wrestling on TBS (WTBS and before that WTCG). The viewers from that allowed Turner to buy the Atlanta Braves and then air them on WTBS. The money from that launched CNN, and then Turner became Mr Cable.
-------------
And then he sold out to Manhattan and you see what its become. I hear Ted is not happy with what they did to his network.

Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 03:03 PM (2graF)

424 Less semen, fewer sperm.

Or, my sperm count is greater than the number of CNN viewers

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at April 12, 2022 03:04 PM (hyqTd)

425 This busty redhead? didn't help CNN meet their projections for the worthless streaming service:
https://is.gd/oiL5Tu
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (DU+/6)

She looks like the redheaded girl from That '70s Show.

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 12, 2022 03:04 PM (4I/2K)

426 only get CNNPlus on their TV's.

That is a war crime.

Posted by: Deplorable Ian Galt at April 12, 2022 03:04 PM (MbgOb)

427 I think it's cool you're getting another kitteh, Wolfus.

My orange tabby turned two on April 1st.
I can't imagine not having him or his sister.

Posted by: SMH at God's grace at April 12, 2022 03:04 PM (nXjQg)

428 The history of Turner Broadcasting was on the back of pro wrestling on TBS (WTBS and before that WTCG). The viewers from that allowed Turner to buy the Atlanta Braves and then air them on WTBS. The money from that launched CNN, and then Turner became Mr Cable.
Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scampe

I miss the NWA.

Posted by: Beautiful Bobby Eaton at April 12, 2022 03:04 PM (FsXsF)

429 400 Somewhere on YouTube there's probably an ASMR consisting of 10 hours of ambient room noise in a sheet metal factory that gets more than 10,000 views a day.
---
I've spent hours watching a farrier trim cow hooves. The shit is hypnotic, man.

Posted by: Meade Lux Lewis, Domestic Terrorist at April 12, 2022 03:04 PM (sWM8x)

430 411 This busty redhead? didn't help CNN meet their projections for the worthless streaming service:
https://is.gd/oiL5Tu
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!)

Geez. Another pretty ginger. I only have so much soul to steal.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at April 12, 2022 03:05 PM (Qhnrt)

431 This busty redhead? didn't help CNN meet their projections for the worthless streaming service:
https://is.gd/oiL5Tu
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM


Her projections, on the other hand...

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at April 12, 2022 03:05 PM (RkC6l)

432 And then he sold out to Manhattan and you see what its become. I hear Ted is not happy with what they did to his network.

He's not, but they announced he was the ceremonial first subscriber of CNN+, as if that means something. Gonna guess he hasn't tuned in.

Posted by: Ian S. at April 12, 2022 03:05 PM (ZGrMX)

433 385 So Dan Rather, Chris Wallace, and Keith Olbermann walk into a bar . . .
Posted by: Count de Monet at April 12, 2022 02:54 PM

For male stripper night.

Male stripper night my ass! I'm here for some action, baby!

Posted by: Chris Wallace's Throbbing Fartclam at April 12, 2022 03:05 PM (2Jd8G)

434 392 The whole less/fewer thing is for erudite and not so erudite people to feel good about themselves. My theory on language is if it's reasonable enough to derive and communicate meaning without losing anything significant, then it's generally fine to write or say.

I tell people I'm feeling good even when I mean well all the time. It's retarded IMO to insist we can't say that so that someone can feel smart.

---------------

Do you mean the Entire less/fewer ...?
Posted by: SH (Overturn Roe) at April 12, 2022 02:57 PM (sX1BW)

hahahahaha

Posted by: m at April 12, 2022 03:05 PM (4vwwZ)

435 Turner became Mr Cable.

How can you overlook his seminal contributions during his time of service as Captain Planet?
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 12, 2022 03:03 PM (pNxlR)

Or his turn as a Confederate General in the Civil War in Gods and Generals? A truly inspirational performance.

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 12, 2022 03:05 PM (4I/2K)

436 She looks like the redheaded girl from That '70s Show.
Posted by: Count de Monet at April 12, 2022


***
Who in turn looked very much like the hottest girl in my senior class in HS. She was nice, and smart, but I saw her lose her temper once. You did not want to be there when that bomb went off.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 03:06 PM (txdEq)

437
She looks like the redheaded girl from That '70s Show.

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 12, 2022 03:04 PM


Yeah! Exactly - the day it was cancelled.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at April 12, 2022 03:06 PM (dQvv7)

438 Then I did think that if families have a service, every person isn't watching that much, but kids and grandparents might be doing the bulk of the viewing and parents watching 1-2 tv episodes or movies a week...

Multiply that by 5 people who have the Netflix password for the one person who pays for the subscription.

Posted by: Caesar North of the Rubicon at April 12, 2022 03:06 PM (BMmaB)

439 386 CNN Fewer

Posted by: ... at April 12, 2022 02:56 PM (etl9f)

---------

Heh.

CNN Reimagined.

Posted by: ShainS -- They are Child Predators, not Groomers at April 12, 2022 03:06 PM (kOXw8)

440 He's not, but they announced he was the ceremonial first subscriber of CNN+, as if that means something. Gonna guess he hasn't tuned in.
----------------
I hear he is dying. Basically his brain is not all that clear these days. He gave us a Blue Dog Democrat News station and now its a funhouse for freaks.

Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 03:07 PM (2graF)

441 If cable were unbundled and you had to pay for CNN, I wonder how many people watching it now for free would drop it?

Posted by: Caesar North of the Rubicon at April 12, 2022 03:07 PM (BMmaB)

442 So Chris Wallace is not a big draw. Gee I wonder why? ROTFLMAO

Posted by: GlendaleGreybeard at April 12, 2022 03:07 PM (K57hO)

443
Somewhere on YouTube there's probably an ASMR consisting of 10 hours of ambient room noise in a sheet metal factory that gets more than 10,000 views a day.
Posted by: Azathoth

https://tinyurl.com/2p8njjd3

18,169,955 views (11 months)
Posted by: Aetius451AD


Now that there is Pulitzer worthy investigative journalism!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 12, 2022 03:07 PM (pNxlR)

444 >$300-million advertising spent to acquire 10,000 viewers works out to $30,000 per viewer.

That's better than minimum wage: they could've paid those viewers directly at a much lower rate.
Posted by: LCMS Rulz! at April 12, 2022 02:53 PM (K58O6)

I'd like to see that on Shark Tank.

"You acquisition cost was HOW MUCH per customer???"

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 12, 2022 03:07 PM (YNyZ9)

445 414 I've been saying I didn't want another Siberian cat or a kitten, as the Siberians I've known have been prickly or sickly, and the last kitten I had (one of the Siberians) drove me nuts waking me up at 2 am to play. Yet here I am considering a new Siberian kitten from Chekov's breeder. When will I learn.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 03:02 PM (txdEq)

I know I don't want another Rottie after my Logan, but I still end up looking at Rottweiler puppies and sighing.

But I think that's partly from missing my boy and not because I really want another 100+ pound pup.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, RIP Oregon Muse at April 12, 2022 03:07 PM (XvPQV)

446 I could have told them this was redundant. I'm already CNN Plus-Sized.

Posted by: Tater Stelter at April 12, 2022 03:08 PM (SchQD)

447 "CNN Moist" might have attracted more interest.

Posted by: m at April 12, 2022 03:08 PM (4vwwZ)

448 --
I've spent hours watching a farrier trim cow hooves. The shit is hypnotic, man.
Posted by: Meade Lux Lewis

i love that channel! dude has some serious skilz and the poor cows nearly always look relieved after the hoof repair.

of course, if some ungulent snagged my right leg, jamed a stick between my toes and proceeded to give me a pedicure, i'd prolly be relieved when it was all done too.

Posted by: BifBewalski @ (UgAdJ) - at April 12, 2022 03:08 PM (UgAdJ)

449 Somewhere on YouTube there's probably an ASMR consisting of 10 hours of ambient room noise in a sheet metal factory that gets more than 10,000 views a day.
Posted by: Azathoth at April 12, 2022 02:59 PM (wb1YC)
++++
Probably. Hell, some of the guys who fix old electronics that I watch routinely rack up CNN numbers. CNN is a joke. They're nothing. Nobody watches them and nobody cares.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 03:08 PM (DU+/6)

450 I tell people I'm feeling good even when I mean well all the time. It's retarded IMO to insist we can't say that so that someone can feel smart.
___

"Feeling good" makes sense.

"Fewer water" does not.

Posted by: SMH at God's grace at April 12, 2022 03:08 PM (nXjQg)

451 388 Washington Commanders? Should've called the Washington Wankers.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 02:54 PM (YqDXo)

***

That team has lost AT LEAST 1/2 of their fan base with their moves over the last 3 years... Maybe more.
Posted by: Truck Monkey Report at April 12, 2022 02:56 PM (flINI)

It's been a 20 year process for Snyder. He signs big name free agents to big money when they are past their primes, hires and fires coaches willy nilly. He traded away the team's future to move up to draft RG3 when the coaches didn't want him. Fast forward a few years later and he makes the call to draft Haskins over the objections of everyone in the organization. He turned the whole organization into a bunch of horndogs that spent the whole time trying to bang the cheerleaders and support staff which lead to the injury of Alex Smith.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper at April 12, 2022 03:09 PM (HJcWr)

452 If cable were unbundled and you had to pay for CNN, I wonder how many people watching it now for free would drop it?

Like EPSN and all those shopping channels. All gone if anyone had a choice.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 03:09 PM (KZzsI)

453 I think it's cool you're getting another kitteh, Wolfus.

My orange tabby turned two on April 1st.
I can't imagine not having him or his sister.
Posted by: SMH at God's grace at April 12, 2022


***
It'll be a while yet. The breeder lady doesn't let them go to new homes until they're 3 months old, and this batch was born on 3/26. I have no idea how I can pick one, either, until I actually see them.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 03:09 PM (txdEq)

454 And yet, DIRECTV dropped One America News from its list of channels. In Texas.

At least we still have Newsmax -- for now.

Posted by: Pete in Texas at April 12, 2022 03:09 PM (SOasJ)

455 Wrasslin' used to be so big, I don't even know any of the names involved any more. Is the Undertaker still around?
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor

He officially retired during Wrestlemania a few weeks ago.
Sting is 63 taking bumps and doing spots reminiscent of ECW. Sting is addicted to the crowd.

Posted by: Beautiful Bobby Eaton at April 12, 2022 03:09 PM (FsXsF)

456 "Fewer water" does not.
Posted by: SMH at God's grace at April 12, 2022 03:08 PM (nXjQg)
++++
But when you have less water, you have fewer molecules of water!

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 12, 2022 03:09 PM (DU+/6)

457 I've spent hours watching a farrier trim cow hooves. The shit is hypnotic, man.

There's a guy at a used parts distributor that does blown engine teardowns every Saturday. It's alternately hypnotic and "ooh, carnage!".

Posted by: Ian S. at April 12, 2022 03:09 PM (ZGrMX)

458 NOOOD

Posted by: Bruce at April 12, 2022 03:10 PM (vd8XM)

459 Yet here I am considering a new Siberian kitten from Chekov's breeder. When will I learn.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 12, 2022 03:02 PM (txdEq)
---------------
Wolfus, check out Maine Coons or just go with a Heinz 57 cat. Inspect their innateness and select the one with a dash of crazy.

Posted by: Puddinhead at April 12, 2022 03:10 PM (2graF)

460 >$300-million advertising spent to acquire 10,000 viewers works out to $30,000 per viewer.

That's better than minimum wage: they could've paid those viewers directly at a much lower rate.
Posted by: LCMS Rulz! at April 12, 2022 02:53 PM (K58O6)

I'd like to see that on Shark Tank.

"You acquisition cost was HOW MUCH per customer???"
Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at April 12, 2022 03:07 PM (YNyZ9)

Still, we beat the city light rail ridership projection guys. They're total wankers!

Posted by: CNN Business Development Department at April 12, 2022 03:10 PM (4I/2K)

461 Nood.

Posted by: What's a Seawolf? at April 12, 2022 03:10 PM (khAeP)

462 He officially retired during Wrestlemania a few weeks ago.

The Undertaker was a dude who genuinely intimidated the crap out of me. I saw that coming down an alley, I'd run the other way. May be the nicest guy ever, but holy crap.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 03:11 PM (KZzsI)

463 Guess that isn't taught anymore either.
Posted by: SMH at God's grace at April 12, 2022 03:02 PM (nXjQg)
___________

I'd settle for agreement in number: "the man shook their hand."

Yow.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 12, 2022 03:11 PM (YqDXo)

464 If Ace would slow down the article postings there would be more comments than CNN+ subscribers.

Posted by: Silent at April 12, 2022 03:11 PM (CrU4U)

465 Fewer water" does not.

Posted by: SMH at God's grace at April 12, 2022 03:08 PM (nXjQg)

You're right. But note I did say "without losing anything significant". Sense is significant.

If someone says "I have less cars than Jay Leno" it's incorrect but not worth mentioning on any planet.

Posted by: ... at April 12, 2022 03:12 PM (etl9f)

466 fewer imbeciles does not necessarily equate to less stupidity.

You need to know how many units per container.

Posted by: Muldoon at April 12, 2022 03:13 PM (m45I2)

467 Chris Wallace failed to position CNN+ for auccess.

Posted by: CV_Gas at April 12, 2022 03:13 PM (cZZI6)

468 A retired FBI agent on Fox said they found shell casings, indicating it was not a pistol but an automatic pistol which are prone to jams. His words. FBI firearms expert and schmart guy.

Posted by: bill in arkansas, not gonna comply with nuttin, waiting for the 0300 knock on the door at April 12, 2022 03:14 PM (lz5hY)

469 410 Wrasslin' used to be so big, I don't even know any of the names involved any more. Is the Undertaker still around?
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 03:01 PM (KZzsI)

Just went into the WWE Hall of Fame a few weeks ago.

It's still pretty big, the WWE and AEW are among the top shows in the 18-49 demo on TV.

Fox pays the WWE $200M+ a year for a Friday night show, and Comcast pays the WWE about $500M a year for Monday and Tuesday night shows, and for the WWE to move their streaming service over to Peacock.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper at April 12, 2022 03:15 PM (HJcWr)

470 >The whole less/fewer thing is for erudite and not so erudite people to feel good about themselves. My theory on language is if it's reasonable enough to derive and communicate meaning without losing anything significant, then it's generally fine to write or say.

The thing about language, like a good sport or game, it's easy to learn but difficult to master, and it is easy to identify people who are much better than you are. People appreciate the cache that can be built with talented speaking, even if they are not snobs or competitive.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 12, 2022 03:15 PM (44ww/)

471 Promo account codes were given out generously, we can assume, likely to other media who would amplify CNN+ content in some way or maybe to the growing number of former Kamala Harris staffers.
Posted by: mercury at April 12, 2022 02:36 PM (l7rT0)

As long as they got the CC info and have them set to auto-renew I doubt they care. Inactive subscribers might even be worth more money to them long term.

Posted by: Sjg at April 12, 2022 03:17 PM (gDSJf)

472 383 Maybe Chris Wallace could go over to MSNBC. He and Joy Reid could do a show together. The Chris and Joy Hour of Power!! What could go wrong?

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 12, 2022 02:55 PM (sAmhv)


Nah, MSNBC won't offer him anything. Because Old.White.Man.

What about CBS? They won't throw a bone to the son of Legendary Award-Winning Loved by All for Decades on 60 Minutes CBS Journalist Mike Wallace?

Posted by: Gref at April 12, 2022 03:18 PM (AMIL/)

473 I miss the NWA.
Posted by: Beautiful Bobby Eaton at April 12, 2022 03:04 PM (FsXsF)

AEW is closer to the NWA than WWE is. Jim Ross and Tony Schiavone do the announcing, and usually one match gets some blood in it. Plus they have Sting still wrestling, and Tully, Arn, and Jake the Snake managing.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper at April 12, 2022 03:20 PM (HJcWr)

474 A retired FBI agent on Fox said they found shell casings, indicating it was not a pistol but an automatic pistol which are prone to jams. His words. FBI firearms expert and schmart guy.
Posted by: bill in arkansas

One generally doesn't find revolver casings. Unless they dump and reload.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 12, 2022 03:20 PM (Ek4HO)

475 I think CNN Minus is going to be, if it isn't already, the Edsel of subscription programming.

Maybe Chris Wallace can find some kind of niche doing Tik Tok videos.

Posted by: Paco at April 12, 2022 03:21 PM (njExo)

476 AEW is closer to the NWA than WWE is. Jim Ross and Tony Schiavone do the announcing, and usually one match gets some blood in it. Plus they have Sting still wrestling, and Tully, Arn, and Jake the Snake managing.
Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper


Fritz von Eric and Harley Race FTW!

Posted by: rickb223 at April 12, 2022 03:22 PM (Ek4HO)

477 The Undertaker was a dude who genuinely intimidated the crap out of me. I saw that coming down an alley, I'd run the other way. May be the nicest guy ever, but holy crap.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 12, 2022 03:11 PM (KZzsI)


Harley Race did that for me. I couldn't watch him on TV because he scared me to death.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper at April 12, 2022 03:22 PM (HJcWr)

478 Really no nothing but headline downstairs on shooter but guessing Jihadist

Posted by: Skip at April 12, 2022 03:24 PM (2JoB8)

479 The Undertaker was a dude who genuinely intimidated the crap out of me. I saw that coming down an alley, I'd run the other way. May be the nicest guy ever, but holy crap.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor

Most of them are including Taker. In high school and in my 20s, frens and I would go on wrestling tours. We would go to the pay per view then Raw the next night and the taping of Raw on Tuesday night. Once we snuck in the open front doors and sat in the upper seats 7 hours before showtime. Wrestlers were coming up to talk to us asking for input about the shows and just chilling. We talked to Matt Hardy for a long time. Legit good dude. Anyway, he talked to the boys and allowed us to come down to ring side while each matchup were going over their spots. Got pictures taken with most of them.

The Giant remembered my friend and I who met him just a few months prior at a bar in the Caribbean. Cigs look like toothpicks in his paws.

We got to go backstage when I was a kid to NWA shows and meet the wrestlers. Rock n Roll Express were great to meet as an 8 year old. All the NWA wrestlers kept kayfabe. The WWE wrestlers we met did not.

Posted by: Beautiful Bobby Eaton at April 12, 2022 03:24 PM (FsXsF)

480 Or a Critical Race Theorist

Posted by: Skip at April 12, 2022 03:24 PM (2JoB8)

481 Posted by: Brian Stelter's Workout Mixtape at April 12, 2022 02:46

Dyin' over here.

Posted by: Taqiyyologist, Rickrolled by Jesus at April 12, 2022 03:24 PM (OssQ4)

482 AEW is closer to the NWA than WWE is. Jim Ross and Tony Schiavone do the announcing, and usually one match gets some blood in it. Plus they have Sting still wrestling, and Tully, Arn, and Jake the Snake managing.
Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper

I thought AEW had some problems and went off the radar for a while. Guess they bounced back. I read that they were pretty woke like the WWE. Ill look into it.
NWA, WWF attitude era, and ECW are not woke.

Posted by: Beautiful Bobby Eaton at April 12, 2022 03:29 PM (FsXsF)

483 >>>293 284 LET'S GO OAKLAND!
----
I think Moneyball is a good film.
Posted by: Dave in Fla at April 12, 2022 02:42 PM (zq4nm)
===
One of the best films of the decade.

I really like Moneyball.

Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 03:30 PM (0G13K)

484 Ace, you'll always be half the man that Brian Stelter is.
Maybe even like, a third.
I'm really not sure how much he weighs.

Posted by: Uncle Jefe at April 12, 2022 03:33 PM (liCvW)

485 I really like Moneyball.
Posted by: ace at April 12, 2022 03:30 PM (0G13K)

Sports analytics changed baseball forever - for good and for bad depending on how effective it is used

Posted by: Boswell at April 12, 2022 03:35 PM (5iUNf)

486 The staff just failed to position CNN+ for success.

Posted by: Giacomo at April 12, 2022 03:36 PM (nc6Kj)

487 My entire reality is now based upon schadenfreude. In all honestly it's working better for me than that old try a little kindness bit. Because so many deserve so much.

Posted by: Dougf at April 12, 2022 03:36 PM (+o0ue)

488 What they obviously need on CNN+ - more Brian Stelter! I mean that guy is El Fuego himself! You need that raw potato energy!

In fact have a back and forth show, call it Brian v. Chris. Stelter versus Wallace.

They could debate about manly topics like motorcycles, hunting, and best draft beers. Maybe in a pool hall - they could be making crazy pool shots, and in-between, debating the topics of importance to virile, manly men.

Do I have to thinking of *everything* for these guys?

Posted by: Inspector Kemp at April 12, 2022 03:42 PM (+DS2f)

489 And I have the best wrestling story every - Mr. Fuji came to my house and ate barbeque chicken.

I also ran into Mr. Perfect at the Austin Airport. He asked me to pass the butter. People came up and got his autograph - I asked if he was famous. he said "I'm Mr. Perfect". I asked if that was a Chippendales thing. He got mad, but we ended up laughing about it. I was serious about the question - he did look like a Chippendales guy.

Posted by: Inspector Kemp at April 12, 2022 03:48 PM (+DS2f)

490 Elon Musk will buy up CNN+, change the name to CNN++, and profit!!

Then, he will direct all talent to jump off a cliff, change the name to MNN, the Mars News Network, run rover video 24/7, and double his money!

Then... "Hello NYT?"

Posted by: Ray Van Dune at April 12, 2022 03:49 PM (Ucb0d)

491 487
Embrace AND.

Schadenfreude AND Misanthropy. I'm a peach.

Posted by: Sir Mix-a-lot at April 12, 2022 03:54 PM (dbdgv)

492 Oh I just love that the CNN minus debacle was based on the projections from McKinsey. There is no company that better represents everything that is screwed up with our society than McKinsey, the Smartest People In The Room, who went to All The Best Schools, and yet somehow never picked up a lick of common sense and can't come up with a practical, successful idea to save their lives. But boy do they look and sound mighty impressive explaining it.

Posted by: Mad Max in VA at April 12, 2022 04:23 PM (hY3+6)

493 Are we sure that was a bird, and not, say, Bill Clinton in the rafters? He's rather partial to blue clothes, as I recall.

Posted by: Citizen Cake at April 12, 2022 07:25 PM (HmZuC)

494 Nic update.

Posted by: ShainS -- Teacher Breacher & Groomer Tumor are the new Stranger Danger at April 12, 2022 08:06 PM (mZ3xv)

495 CNN HAS FAILED THE BASIC RULES OF REPORTING
REPORT FACTS
CNN IS VERY OPEN ABOUT THE LIES THEY TELL DON LEMON IS A LEMON FOR SURE WHEN IT COMES TO FACTS

Posted by: JEFF TURPIN at April 14, 2022 03:17 PM (ieski)

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