Quickie Cafe

corgismile.jfif

Flouncing panda.

Sea lion just dozin'.

That wintry eye look.

Fresh!

Dogs are born to serve and protect. Sometimes, though, they can just be a pain in the ass.

Tuxedo and fur coat.

One dog walks another dog. Also, both dogs wait for the signal to cross the street.

Dogs in a ball pit.

Sugar gliders tandem jump.

Inman: Hillary Clinton MasterClass edition.

Carjacker on a spree gets shot to death. Not funny, exactly, but... okay it is kind of funny. Pretty hilarz actually.



This is Jake Tapper's Morning Affirmation:




Posted by: Ace at 08:02 PM




Comments

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1 Were going to keep at it to make sure the American people are paying their fair share for gas, he said.

10 bucks

Posted by: rhennigantx at December 08, 2021 08:02 PM (yrol0)

2 I am centered

Posted by: rhennigantx at December 08, 2021 08:03 PM (yrol0)

3
W
I
D
E

Posted by: Skip at December 08, 2021 08:03 PM (2JoB8)

4 Good evening everyone.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 08, 2021 08:04 PM (mD/uy)

5 Puppy dogs are good.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:05 PM (wAnMi)

6 That Inman video is priceless.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:06 PM (wAnMi)

7 That carjacker story - I just love happy endings.

Hmmmm. . . . . That applies to Hitlery's tale too!

Posted by: Tonypete at December 08, 2021 08:06 PM (mD/uy)

8 Juggling otter is too funny
Perp getting popped was kinda too

Posted by: Skip at December 08, 2021 08:06 PM (2JoB8)

9 Demon mirror cat!!

Posted by: Jmel at December 08, 2021 08:07 PM (bVhJi)

10 I never had a cat that would look in the mirror. Mine were all defective.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:08 PM (Bmy3R)

11 Panda is drunk. Still like.

Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:09 PM (V13WU)

12 Excellent Peekaboo!

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at December 08, 2021 08:09 PM (iMZHt)

13 Top pic:
It's just not fair that a puppy can look so cuuuuute!
_________
http://bit.ly/the-innkeeper
got a bad rap

Posted by: mindful webworker - missing my ol dog at December 08, 2021 08:09 PM (MoQ46)

14 10 I never had a cat that would look in the mirror. Mine were all defective.
Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:08 PM (Bmy3R)

Vampire cats.

Reputable breeder should have warned you.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at December 08, 2021 08:09 PM (6FeV1)

15 hiya

Posted by: JT at December 08, 2021 08:09 PM (arJlL)

16 I got big mirrors, 3 feet x 4 feet from a job a long long time ago, well when moved into my house mounted then covering end wall in basement. Our 2 cats who at least nights lived in basement but never noticed them much thinking mirror cat was another cat. And had them 17 and 19 years respectively.

Posted by: Skip at December 08, 2021 08:10 PM (2JoB8)

17 This has become my favorite thread! My ostritch head in the hole for a hour or so.

Posted by: Agitator at December 08, 2021 08:10 PM (KzbMc)

18 I have no doubts there's a ball pit somewhere around the rainbow bridge.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:10 PM (wAnMi)

19 Macomb Cty MI

17.6% of surveyed voters resulted in anomalies that indicate fraudulent votes were cast.

Posted by: rhennigantx at December 08, 2021 08:10 PM (yrol0)

20 What the fvck does that retard mean by our "fair share?"

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at December 08, 2021 08:11 PM (Q9lwr)

21 I did have a cat that really loved to watch hockey games. He was very interested in following the puck. He'd park himself in front of the TV and watch whole games with me. Not into mirrors though.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:11 PM (Bmy3R)

22
What type of creature is that with the bib on?

Posted by: Soothsayer -- at December 08, 2021 08:12 PM (2u35I)

23 The Good Life raccoon captures all the joy of sitting down with a good snack.

Posted by: lizabth at December 08, 2021 08:12 PM (L3Rsz)

24 Law school application offers 13 genders

Law school application ONLY offers 13 genders

Posted by: rhennigantx at December 08, 2021 08:12 PM (yrol0)

25 Cuteness Overload: "Mixing a corgi with any other breed results in what is basically a corgi in disguise as the other breed."

tinyurl.com/47mvfky9

Posted by: ... at December 08, 2021 08:12 PM (ZpC60)

26 What breed is that little do in first pic ?

Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:12 PM (V13WU)

27 *dog

Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:12 PM (V13WU)

28 Dog up top is super cute

Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 08, 2021 08:13 PM (eGTCV)

29 Christmas music Mt. Rushmore. I have odd tastes, so mine are: "Back Door Santa" by Clarence Carter, "The Season's Upon Us" by Dropkick Murphys, "Fairytale of New York" by The Pogues, and "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)" by Darlene Love...

Posted by: Mookie at December 08, 2021 08:13 PM (u+Y3T)

30 Imagine that, a carjacker in Portland stealing a Subaru. Like, he had any choice whatsoever.

I thought they were state issued when you move there?

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:13 PM (wAnMi)

31 What the fvck does that retard mean by our "fair share?"
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

20 bucks in all the towns.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at December 08, 2021 08:13 PM (iMZHt)

32 What type of creature is that with the bib on?
Posted by: Soothsayer -- at December 08, 2021 08:12 PM (2u35I)

Looks like a Coon.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at December 08, 2021 08:13 PM (R/m4+)

33 What breed is that little do in first pic ?
Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:12 PM (V13WU)


Corgi.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:13 PM (wAnMi)

34 John Goodman lost a ton of weight. Now he looks like a melted candle.

Posted by: JuJuBee at December 08, 2021 08:13 PM (mNhhD)

35 What kind of idiot would try to domesticate a raccoon ?

Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:15 PM (V13WU)

36
Why am I only finding out now about Mike Hammer's aneurism?

Keep me in the loop with these things, please.


Posted by: Soothsayer -- "fuck around and find out" at December 08, 2021 08:15 PM (2u35I)

37 puppy breath!

Posted by: Ben Had at December 08, 2021 08:15 PM (CdA/y)

38 Macomb Cty MI

Only night I ever spent in jail was in Macomb County.

F'd up story. All charges were dropped (because they were completely bogus) as soon as I retained a lawyer. The cops were complete assholes. I'm Italian and from NY (I was visiting my sister in MI) and was called a greaseball, wop, fucking NY piece of shit dago, etc. all the way by both officers. Also, Macomb County stole 100 dollars out of my wallet.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:15 PM (Bmy3R)

39 20 To the greenness it means European prices. To wine mom Karen it means she doesn't have to buy Valurite brand wine after filling up the gas tank. It's the perfect blank slate as long as the media never tries to pin him down.

Guess the spoiler on the media ever doing that.

Posted by: Bete at December 08, 2021 08:15 PM (Ojki1)

40 20 What the fvck does that retard mean by our "fair share?"
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at December 08, 2021 08:11 PM (Q9lwr)

I have read and studied this.

It is usually that one has more than there FARI SHARE.

So if I have 100 bucks and you have 1000 you have more than your fair share.

It assumes there is only $1100 in the system.

Posted by: rhennigantx at December 08, 2021 08:15 PM (yrol0)

41 Corgi.
Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:13 PM (wAnMi)

I kinda thought that, but ...not entirely ?

Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:15 PM (V13WU)

42 I suppose a hockey game is very similar to a laser pointer

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:15 PM (AwPyG)

43
Looks like a Coon.
Posted by: Hairyback Guy


Racoons come in orange color?

Posted by: Soothsayer -- at December 08, 2021 08:16 PM (2u35I)

44 32 What type of creature is that with the bib on?
Posted by: Soothsayer -- at December 08, 2021 08:12 PM (2u35I)

Looks like a Coon.
Posted by: Hairyback Guy at December 08, 2021 08:13 PM (R/m4+)

Dude. That's racist AF.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Sexual Racist. at December 08, 2021 08:16 PM (II3Gr)

45 It's a month since I quit cigarettes. Haven't gone back. Yet.

Posted by: Eeyore at December 08, 2021 08:16 PM (7X3UV)

46 The beauty of the fair share concept is that it's totally subjective.

Posted by: lowandslow at December 08, 2021 08:17 PM (4thlk)

47 45 It's a month since I quit cigarettes. Haven't gone back. Yet.
Posted by: Eeyore at December 08, 2021 08:16 PM (7X3UV)

Good for you! Stay strong!

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Sexual Racist. at December 08, 2021 08:17 PM (II3Gr)

48 Insomniac!!!

Posted by: Ben Had at December 08, 2021 08:17 PM (CdA/y)

49 @38

As some of us have pointed out, when you watch enough of "the first 48", you notice that the suspects who lawyer up get a lesser sentence.

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:17 PM (AwPyG)

50 It's a month since I quit cigarettes. Haven't gone back. Yet.
Posted by: Eeyore

One day at a time...
Congrats!

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at December 08, 2021 08:18 PM (iMZHt)

51 What kind of idiot would try to domesticate a raccoon ?
Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:15 PM (V13WU)


For some reason, back in the 60's and maybe early 70's, Californians had a thing about keeping wild animals. I know a lot of families that had Raccoons. I don't think it ever ended well. Yeah, they're sort of cute and harmless when itty-bitty. But that's a very short term thing.

I know a few families that were falconers as well, that kind of made sense. Of course, as a young teen I really, really wanted a red tailed hawk. But, living vicariously through people that owned them worked just fine as it turned out. And, a lot cheaper/less work by far.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:18 PM (wAnMi)

52 As some of us have pointed out, when you watch enough of "the first 48", you notice that the suspects who lawyer up get a lesser sentence.

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:17 PM (AwPyG)

Tom Segura has a whole bit about that

Posted by: Warai-otoko at December 08, 2021 08:19 PM (6FeV1)

53 @46

I wonder if the "fair share" language was cooked up when the biden team huddled-up with the media the other day

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:19 PM (AwPyG)

54 I used to have my ski mask freeze walking to school in the winter in the midwest. Also my pant legs would freeze. No where near as cold as eye freeze place.

Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:19 PM (a1pQd)

55 Racoons come in orange color?
Posted by: Soothsayer

So they don't get shot during hunting season.

Posted by: JT at December 08, 2021 08:19 PM (arJlL)

56
This is hilarious: The pilot logs for epstein shown in court almost completely redacted.

Except for, you know, "Donald Trump" and "Alan Dershowitz," I suspect. Everything else is redacted.

What a fucking Clown Govt we have.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- at December 08, 2021 08:19 PM (2u35I)

57 Must. Resist. Puppy.

Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at December 08, 2021 08:20 PM (OQcPl)

58 Whoever runs FJB is either doing purposeful sabotage or is an idiot beyond comprehension by the normal mind..BO used to be able to make idiots think the govt would pay for their gas, now they think people will like them if they promise to make people pay more? How would that work? And every time I hear the name "Megan Thee Stallion" I do an internal handshake at the "wha?" of trying to sell a woman as " hot" by describing her as a large male horse. "Jayne The Bull Mansfield" "Strong Sweaty Well Hung Marilyn Monroe". These are the Stupid Times.

Posted by: Azjaeger at December 08, 2021 08:20 PM (3/XaG)

59 45 It's a month since I quit cigarettes. Haven't gone back. Yet.

Posted by: Eeyore at December 08, 2021 08:16 PM (7X3UV)

Congrats and good job! I quit in July 2004. Hang in there - the first seven or eight years are the hardest, then it starts to get a little better.

Just kidding. If you make it a week, you're golden. After a week, if you start again, it's a choice rather than an addiction. But you will notice that even years later, you still get a craving. I get them sometimes with coffee on a cold morning, or after a big dinner.

Posted by: Pennsyltucky at December 08, 2021 08:20 PM (lNHqD)

60 Christmas music Mt. Rushmore. I have odd tastes, so mine are: "Back Door Santa" by Clarence Carter, "The Season's Upon Us" by Dropkick Murphys, "Fairytale of New York" by The Pogues, and "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)" by Darlene Love...
Posted by: Mookie at December 08, 2021 08:13 PM (u+Y3T)

Back Door Santa is Pete Buttigieg's favorite.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 08, 2021 08:20 PM (eGTCV)

61 I used to have my ski mask freeze walking to school in the winter in the midwest. Also my pant legs would freeze. No where near as cold as eye freeze place.
Posted by: banana Dream

Did they get the Christmas Story 'licking the flagpole' bit from your youth?

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (iMZHt)

62 Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:18 PM (wAnMi)


falconers , that's normal. great sport. coons ? no way.

Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (V13WU)

63 What the fvck does that retard mean by our "fair share?"
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

"When I use a word," Humpty Xiden said in rather a scornful tone, "it means just what I choose it to mean -- neither more nor less."

Posted by: Tonypete at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (mD/uy)

64 There is a basket with ten apples for sale.

You buy one. Then I buy the other nine.

You can't then come at me and say I owe you four apples.

I mean, you can, but I will then proceed to throw a core at your head, and it WILL connect.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (6FeV1)

65 Thank you, rhomboid, from the other thread,

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (UHVv4)

66 Headshake, not handshake

Posted by: Azjaeger at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (3/XaG)

67 bleach blonde raccoon?

Posted by: illiniwek at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (Cus5s)

68 Still at zero total Omicron deaths worldwide per the MSM and WHO btw.
Posted by: Moron Robbie

We have no idea how many died from delta. The tests don't differentiate.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (EfigE)

69 Phil Collins In The Air Tonight is the most cited song by professional athletes to get ready for a game.

Posted by: TC at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (vEj4+)

70 Big blow to Bill: De Blasio NYC vaxx mandate blocked by judge.

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at December 08, 2021 08:22 PM (UHVv4)

71 What a fucking Clown Govt we have.
Posted by: Soothsayer --

Just because the Prez shits his pants ?

Posted by: JT at December 08, 2021 08:22 PM (arJlL)

72 Looks like a Coon.
Posted by: Hairyback Guy

Racoons come in orange color?
Posted by: Soothsayer -- at December 08, 2021 08:16 PM (2u35I)


They're called blonde raccoons, it's a natural mutation but incredibly rare. Like 10 in a million (but maybe they've figured out a way to breed them now?). There's also albino raccoons (as everything) which are even more rare.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:22 PM (wAnMi)

73 Kitten mirror dance is just the way to end the evening.

Posted by: Eromero at December 08, 2021 08:22 PM (0OP+5)

74 @JackPosobiec; 4h
We now know the FBI uncovered 20,000 images from Epstein's mansion in Manhattan

None of those are being entered into the Ghislaine Maxwell case

This isn't an investigation, this is a coverup

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at December 08, 2021 08:22 PM (UHVv4)

75 Phil Collins In The Air Tonight is the most cited song by professional athletes to get ready for a game.
Posted by: TC at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (vEj4+)


I did not know that.

Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:23 PM (V13WU)

76 Racoons come in orange color?
Posted by: Soothsayer

So they don't get shot during hunting season.
Posted by: JT at December 08, 2021 08:19 PM (arJlL)


MAGA raccoons.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:23 PM (wAnMi)

77
Phil Collins In The Air Tonight is the most cited song by professional athletes to get ready for a game.

Posted by: TC at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM


bestest use of that song was in that one episode of Miami Vice

Posted by: AltonJackson at December 08, 2021 08:23 PM (DUIap)

78
lol @ biden being only 11 months younger than when the krauts bombed Hawaii

Posted by: Soothsayer -- at December 08, 2021 08:24 PM (2u35I)

79
Trump left Biden with the most deadly mutation there is!!!

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 08, 2021 08:24 PM (/U27+)

80 If a grizzly bear or polar bear is chasing you, would it chase after a bright red ball (not than kind of ball, you preverts) or a frisbee that you throw to the side of the trail, thus letting you easily get away? I mean, all other mammals seem to love chasing thrown balls and frisbees, right? Someone should do a test. Several Antifa dunces could be conned into doing it for a few dollars and twelve-pack each, I think.

Posted by: Gref at December 08, 2021 08:25 PM (AMIL/)

81 bestest use of that song was in that one episode of Miami Vice
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 08, 2021 08:23 PM (DUIap)

Michelob beer commercial.

Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:25 PM (V13WU)

82 @75

I might have to call BS on that.

I would think athletes want something that gears you up.

ex: the guys about to parachute out of planes play heavy metal, I'm told.

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:25 PM (AwPyG)

83 And that is the suspicious thing about "first case of omicron" in this state or that state. The tests run in hospitals and clinics don't identify variants. And they haven't just started sending thousands of positive tests to the specialized labs to check the variant. So... how do we know?

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 08:25 PM (EfigE)

84 49 @38
As some of us have pointed out, when you watch enough of "the first 48", you notice that the suspects who lawyer up get a lesser sentence. I had been picked up (not the other way around) by a hot blonde in a bar. Went back to her place and bumped uglies. Next day she called me and wanted me to come over for a repeat performance. Between her calling and me showing up, her real boyfriend, who I didn't know existed, had shown up at her place. This was before cell phones. So, when I got there, she panicked and told her real boyfriend I was some obesessive stalker who had met her in a bar the previous night and had shown up unwanted.

All it took was a threat to subpoena her phone records, which would have shown that she had called me and not the other way around, plus, even better, I had a crumpled up mash-note she had left me the previous morning, talking about how much she had enjoyed the sex we had just had, and the dummy signed her name to it.

My attorney said the assistant DA laughed out loud when he saw it and said, "I'll talk to her, and tell her she's lucky she isn't being charged with filing a false report, but you can tell your client this is over right now."

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:26 PM (Bmy3R)

85 Several Antifa dunces could be conned into doing it for a few dollars and twelve-pack each, I think.
Posted by: Gref at December 08, 2021 08:25 PM (AMIL/)

Waraiotoko: "Gref, you forgot to give that one the ball!"

Gref: "Eh, fukkit. We'll call him the Control Group."

Waraiotoko: "Right on."

Posted by: Warai-otoko at December 08, 2021 08:26 PM (6FeV1)

86 @80

Maybe you should just talk reasonably to the bear, and try to rehabilitate him

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:26 PM (AwPyG)

87 80 If a grizzly bear or polar bear is chasing you, would it chase after a bright red ball (not than kind of ball, you preverts) or a frisbee that you throw to the side of the trail, thus letting you easily get away? I mean, all other mammals seem to love chasing thrown balls and frisbees, right? Someone should do a test. Several Antifa dunces could be conned into doing it for a few dollars and twelve-pack each, I think.
Posted by: Gref at December 08, 2021 08:25 PM (AMIL/)

If only Timothy Treadwell had had a frisbee.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 08, 2021 08:26 PM (eGTCV)

88 Someone should do a test. Several Antifa dunces could be conned into doing it for a few dollars and twelve-pack each, I think.
Posted by: Gref

Sounds like a women Studies PhD thesis to me.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at December 08, 2021 08:27 PM (iMZHt)

89 Guy Smiley, must have been some of that Midwest niceness we're always hearing about.

Posted by: From That Time at December 08, 2021 08:27 PM (4780s)

90
Kaiser Wilhelm has less than a month left as mayor of NYC, but he's still got the pedal floored as he takes the city off the cliff.

That's commitment, folks.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- at December 08, 2021 08:27 PM (2u35I)

91 falconers , that's normal. great sport. coons ? no way.
Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (V13WU)


You'd have to be batshit insane - but this is california. One family I knew had one, and it absolutely destroyed the inside of their house one day. Kitchen cabinets, sofas, chairs. They're industrious little pieces of shit. Having seen what one can do to my lawn overnight (looks like a rototiller came in) I can just imagine.

Luckily back then they could just have it put down instead of giving it back to nature. IIRC, most everybody I remember with one was a hippy. Except the family, and they were just nuts.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:27 PM (wAnMi)

92 "Fair share" carries no gravitas unless it's whispered into the microphone.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at December 08, 2021 08:29 PM (BPuaD)

93 So... how do we know?
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 08:25 PM (EfigE)


Comrade C A T, when in doubt, trust your betters!

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 08:30 PM (hOUT3)

94 Ace,
Once again, thank you for this thread.

Posted by: Zoot at December 08, 2021 08:30 PM (U2p+3)

95 >>> Did they get the Christmas Story 'licking the flagpole' bit from your youth?
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM (iMZHt)

No I grew out of putting my tongue onto strange objects when I was three probably. Wait I guess that was ralphy's younger brother, not a toddler but pretty young, younger than ralphy.

Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:30 PM (a1pQd)

96 So then where's my Fair Share of the Biden's international racketeering? You gonna send me a check, Big Guy? Huh?

Posted by: Warai-otoko at December 08, 2021 08:30 PM (6FeV1)

97 My attorney said the assistant DA laughed out loud when he saw it and said, "I'll talk to her, and tell her she's lucky she isn't being charged with filing a false report, but you can tell your client this is over right now."
Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:26 PM (Bmy3R)


Man, that would be a sentence for you these days. Even WITH a note, text messages etc., it would still be your fault, you misogynistic stalking nazi you. You just brainwashed the poor girl.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:30 PM (wAnMi)

98 In the Air Tonight was a song In Against All Odds right?

Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 08:30 PM (VJ4aP)

99 89 Guy Smiley, must have been some of that Midwest niceness we're always hearing about.

I did pick up a bit of jailhouse poetry during my one night in jail:

I've fucked in France, I've fucked in Spain
I've fucked up and down the coast of Maine
But I'll never be happy, I'll never be free
Till I fuck Macomb County like they fucked me.

It was 30 years ago and I still want my hundred dollars back that they stole from my belongings at the jail.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:31 PM (Bmy3R)

100 >>> Ace,
Once again, thank you for this thread.
Posted by: Zoot at December 08, 2021 08:30 PM (U2p+3)


It ain't spanking but it'll do.

Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:31 PM (a1pQd)

101 80 If a grizzly bear or polar bear is chasing you, would it chase after a bright red ball (not than kind of ball, you preverts) or a frisbee that you throw to the side of the trail, thus letting you easily get away? I mean, all other mammals seem to love chasing thrown balls and frisbees, right? Someone should do a test. Several Antifa dunces could be conned into doing it for a few dollars and twelve-pack each, I think.
Posted by: Gref at December 08, 2021 08:25 PM (AMIL/)

If only Timothy Treadwell had had a frisbee.
Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 08, 2021 08:26 PM (eGTCV)

They'll find the chewed frisbee right next to the bear poop that smells like bear spray and has little silver bells in it.

Posted by: Agitator at December 08, 2021 08:31 PM (KzbMc)

102 No I grew out of putting my tongue onto strange objects when I was three probably. Wait I guess that was ralphy's younger brother, not a toddler but pretty young, younger than ralphy.
Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:30 PM (a1pQd)


That was a double-dog dare IIRC, so not a voluntary thing, just pride.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:31 PM (wAnMi)

103 rhennigantx if you're here, any links for the MI election analysis? Can't find a thing. Though I did get a redundant reminder of what an orwellian world we now live in - search terms yield pages and pages of stupid propaganda about "election denial" and other such juvenile crap.

Screening 99% of all pop culture and "news" out of my life, it's stunning every time I'm exposed to it.

Truly a society dumbed down beyond recognition.

Posted by: rhomboid at December 08, 2021 08:32 PM (OTzUX)

104 My attorney said the assistant DA laughed out loud when he saw it and said, "I'll talk to her, and tell her she's lucky she isn't being charged with filing a false report, but you can tell your client this is over right now."
Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:26 PM (Bmy3R)

Man, that would be a sentence for you these days. Even WITH a note, text messages etc., it would still be your fault, you misogynistic stalking nazi you. You just brainwashed the poor girl.
Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:30 PM (wAnMi)


have to be very careful these days

Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:32 PM (V13WU)

105 Truly a society dumbed down beyond recognition.

Posted by: rhomboid at December 08, 2021 08:32 PM (OTzUX)

On the other hand, "Ass: The Movie" is probably right around the corner. So that's nice.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at December 08, 2021 08:32 PM (6FeV1)

106 The tests run in hospitals and clinics don't identify variants. And they haven't just started sending thousands of positive tests to the specialized labs to check the variant. So... how do we know?
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy

Quiet peasant! We are not Drs. so how could we possibly question those that make medical pronouncements from on high.

Oh, wait. . . .

Posted by: Tonypete at December 08, 2021 08:33 PM (mD/uy)

107 It was 30 years ago and I still want my hundred dollars back that they stole from my belongings at the jail.
Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:31 PM (Bmy3R)

Drunk tank?

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at December 08, 2021 08:33 PM (QKtAT)

108 In The Air Tonight is kind of insensitive to people who don't have air or nights. Or access to prepositions or definite articles.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at December 08, 2021 08:33 PM (QU5/8)

109 What the fvck does that retard mean by our "fair share?"

One of the benefits of being "educated" (and a bit of a curse, too) and familiar with leftist weltanschaung, you can read between the lines on their rhetoric. Their talking points are forged in groupthink bubbles, and are not held to any rigorous debate or anything. It's just slogans and thought ending cliches all the way down.

Allow me to translate. Gasoline is very heavily taxed in many countries, particularly Europe. It's also true the Federal excise tax dwarfs what profit a gas station makes on a gallon of gasoline.

Leftists are completely oblivious to this. They just "feel" that it is "unfair" that Americans pay $2 a gallon, while somebody else has to pay $10 because of confiscatory tax rates.

Everything is an inversion to them. It is unthinkable, therefore, to advocate for lower taxes on European fuel, the answer is to raise our tax rates to reach parity. Many different fascist schemes along these lines have been floated along these lines. They want affordable, personal transportation dead. Among other things. They don't much care for air conditioning, affordable food, and many, many others

Posted by: Common Tater at December 08, 2021 08:33 PM (n0Iwq)

110
This is old but it just came up for me on youtube.

So Cute...

Dad confuses his twins, gets corrected:

https://youtu.be/bIjSdEdKelE

Posted by: Soothsayer -- at December 08, 2021 08:34 PM (2u35I)

111 No I grew out of putting my tongue onto strange objects when I was three probably. Wait I guess that was ralphy's younger brother, not a toddler but pretty young, younger than ralphy.
Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:30 PM (a1pQd)

That was a double-dog dare IIRC, so not a voluntary thing, just pride.
Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:31 PM (wAnMi)


Schwartz: I TRIPLE-dog-dare ya!

Ralphie as an Adult: [narrating] Schwartz created a slight breach of etiquette by skipping the triple dare and going right for the throat!

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 08, 2021 08:35 PM (4I/2K)

112 >>> 1 Were going to keep at it to make sure the American people are paying their fair share for gas, he said.

10 bucks
Posted by: rhennigantx at December 08, 2021 08:02 PM (yrol0)

Good thing the Democrats are For the Little Guy!

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at December 08, 2021 08:35 PM (llON8)

113 None of those are being entered into the Ghislaine Maxwell case

This isn't an investigation, this is a coverup
Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at December 08, 2021 08:22 PM (UHVv4)


Comrade, that's not important right now.

FWIW, the FIB has been thoroughly corrupt since the days of J Edgar!

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 08:35 PM (hOUT3)

114 They want affordable, personal transportation dead. Among other things. They don't much care for air conditioning, affordable food, and many, many others
Posted by: Common Tater

You forgot soap and shampoo.

Posted by: JT at December 08, 2021 08:36 PM (arJlL)

115 Drunk tank?
Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at December 08, 2021 08:33 PM (QKtAT)

Yep.

All the drunks and druggies had hogged up all the bench space for sleeping so I had to stand up all night, taking with some poor kid who got nabbed in a bar fight.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:37 PM (Bmy3R)

116 True conservatives are libertarians.

Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 08:37 PM (kcdby)

117 114
You forgot soap and shampoo.

Posted by: JT at December 08, 2021 08:36 PM (arJlL)

-------

Well, the Lefties figure if they never use 'em, why should we?

Posted by: Pennsyltucky at December 08, 2021 08:37 PM (lNHqD)

118 They want affordable, personal transportation dead. Among other things. They don't much care for air conditioning, affordable food, and many, many others
Posted by: Common Tater

You forgot soap and shampoo.
Posted by: JT at December 08, 2021 08:36 PM (arJlL)

Manly footwear.

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 08, 2021 08:37 PM (4I/2K)

119 They want affordable, personal transportation dead.


They want a lot of us dead.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at December 08, 2021 08:37 PM (QKtAT)

120 Common Tater, I think they very much care for all those things but are sure that that can not be sustainable for all so they must protect these for themselves. Fair is you do with less so I can have mine.

Posted by: Ben Had at December 08, 2021 08:38 PM (CdA/y)

121 They want affordable, personal transportation dead. Among other things. They don't much care for air conditioning, affordable food, and many, many others

=====

On the personal transportation issue, I'm torn between thinking that the commies are always wrong and thinking that the Amish are always right. I'll probably have to flip a coin or something.

Posted by: Geronimo Stilton at December 08, 2021 08:38 PM (sGnvY)

122 They are showing a movie on BET tonight called Karen.

About a white lady trying to get a new black family to leave the neighborhood.




Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 08:38 PM (VJ4aP)

123 Tired of being told what to do by conservatives. Vote Libertarian.

Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 08:39 PM (kcdby)

124 >>> What kind of idiot would try to domesticate a raccoon ?
Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:15 PM (V13WU)

For some reason, back in the 60's and maybe early 70's, Californians had a thing about keeping wild animals. I know a lot of families that had Raccoons. I don't think it ever ended well. Yeah, they're sort of cute and harmless when itty-bitty. But that's a very short term thing.
Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:18 PM (wAnMi)


The only thing I can think about when I see videos of people with animals in their home is there has to be poop and pee everywhere. I don't think you can train these things like dogs.

Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:39 PM (a1pQd)

125
They'll find the chewed frisbee right next to the bear poop that smells like bear spray and has little silver bells in it.
Posted by: Agitator


It's Christmas time in the city.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at December 08, 2021 08:39 PM (63Dwl)

126 You get orange racoons when a big Maine Coon Cat rules the neighborhood.

Posted by: lowandslow at December 08, 2021 08:39 PM (4thlk)

127 Ass2: Another movie. Coming less soon than Ass: The Movie.

Yeah, it's a Baldwin Trilogy of Two.

Posted by: klaftern at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (taPSh)

128
Manly footwear.

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 08, 2021 08:37 PM


leather boots, required

Posted by: Zombie Merle Haggard at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (DUIap)

129 Christmas music Mt. Rushmore. I have odd tastes, so mine are: "Back Door Santa" by Clarence Carter, "The Season's Upon Us" by Dropkick Murphys, "Fairytale of New York" by The Pogues, and "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)" by Darlene Love...
Posted by: Mookie at December 08, 2021 08:13 PM (u+Y3T)


U2 did a great version of Baby Please Come Home back in the late 80s when they were at their peak.
Some other great ones...
Billy Squier - Christmas is a time to say I love you.
Whirling Dervishes - Mr Grinch.
The Kinks - Father Christmas.
Tom Petty - Christmas All Over Again.

Posted by: Doof at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (mZUr4)

130 Fair is you do with less so I can have mine.
Posted by: Ben Had at December 08, 2021 08:38 PM (CdA/y)


And {{{Ben Had}}} gets it, of course!

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (hOUT3)

131 It was 30 years ago and I still want my hundred dollars back that they stole from my belongings at the jail.
Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:31 PM (Bmy3R)


Man, a hundred bucks in 1990 dollars is like - $211.62?!?!?!?!!

Fuck me. That's so wrong. So a million bucks in 1990 is half a mil now? In fact I see it's gone up nearly 13% since 2017, 8% since 2019. Really, the best I can do in the stock market is slightly below or slightly ahead of inflation when averaged out.

FUCK JOE BIDEN

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (wAnMi)

132 I wonder what ever happened to that old bastard who was feeding the coons those hot dogs up in Maine or Canada last year?

Hope they didn't eat him too.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (R/m4+)

133 What breed is that little do in first pic ?
Posted by: runner

Corgi.
Posted by: clutch cargo

I kinda thought that, but ...not entirely ?
Posted by: runner


Well, the thread title says it's a Quickie. Is that chihuahua/corgi mix? I don't think there's a dog breed that starts with "Q".

Posted by: mikeski at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (P1f+c)

134 Tired of being told what to do by conservatives. Vote Libertarian.
Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 08:39 PM (kcdby)

Yep. Throw away your vote on a bunch of stoners who are just fine with taking in all the world's trash via the mexican border.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (P3gRi)

135 I haven't heard of the Biden dogs lately.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 08, 2021 08:41 PM (eGTCV)

136 LSU offered Jimbo Fisher 125 million, and he said: Nope

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:41 PM (AwPyG)

137 Ooops off zoot sock

Posted by: nurse ratched at December 08, 2021 08:41 PM (U2p+3)

138 Back in the Bush the Lesser days when gas prices spiked the media, including the local rag, were all in on blaming gas companies.

One of the local Citgos decide they were done with being scapegoated and had printed up a sheet and attached it to each pump laying out cost of gas, and then what their (meager) profit on it was versus the Federal and state taxes.

It didn't stay up long, so I wonder if the State Regulators gave them a call to get them to stop educating people.

Posted by: Bete at December 08, 2021 08:42 PM (Ojki1)

139 124
The only thing I can think about when I see videos of people with animals in their home is there has to be poop and pee everywhere. I don't think you can train these things like dogs.

Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:39 PM (a1pQd)
-----------------

When I was in grade school, the G&T teacher had a pet skunk which she once brought to school with her for the day. It had of course been destankified, and it was friendly and cute. She said that it would use a litter box and was very much like having a pet cat, except that it would chew through the sheetrock once in a while.

Posted by: Pennsyltucky at December 08, 2021 08:42 PM (lNHqD)

140 My fair share of a gallon of gas doesn't include any taxes. Just sayin.

Posted by: Goliad's Ghosts at December 08, 2021 08:42 PM (oWBc3)

141 The only thing I can think about when I see videos of people with animals in their home is there has to be poop and pee everywhere. I don't think you can train these things like dogs.
Posted by: banana Dream


You can litterbox train raccoons. I have yet to find a male wild animal that is cool with human males when they grow up and their nuts drop. They see other males as a threat.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 08, 2021 08:42 PM (uXonU)

142 What kind of idiot would try to domesticate a raccoon ?

Probably the same one who thought *biden was a good fit for President?

Posted by: Martini Farmer at December 08, 2021 08:43 PM (BFigT)

143 Yesterday I put out some food for cats that hang at my mom's retirement home. After I came out of her apartment I saw a trash panda with his dirty paws in the cat food. I swear he shot me the finger when I tried to shoo him away.

Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 08:43 PM (VJ4aP)

144 All I am saying is you cons, can't out conservative me because, I am a Libertarian and love freedom more than ye all. It's the truth.

Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 08:43 PM (kcdby)

145 Well, the thread title says it's a Quickie. Is that chihuahua/corgi mix? I don't think there's a dog breed that starts with "Q".
Posted by: mikeski at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (P1f+c)


Quiche Bichon Frise.

Posted by: Barack H. Obama at December 08, 2021 08:44 PM (wAnMi)

146 When I was in grade school, the G&T teacher had a pet skunk which she once brought to school with her for the day. It had of course been destankified, and it was friendly and cute. She said that it would use a litter box and was very much like having a pet cat, except that it would chew through the sheetrock once in a while.
Posted by: Pennsyltucky at December 08, 2021 08:42 PM (lNHqD)

Did that school have Scotch & Soda teachers, too?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 08:44 PM (P3gRi)

147 I know a lot of families that had Raccoons. I don't think it ever ended well. Yeah, they're sort of cute and harmless when itty-bitty. But that's a very short term thing.
Posted by: clutch cargo

The only thing I can think about when I see videos of people with animals in their home is there has to be poop and pee everywhere. I don't think you can train these things like dogs.
Posted by: banana Dream


People saw videos of raccoons washing food in a river, and thought "what a clean animal"?

Posted by: mikeski at December 08, 2021 08:44 PM (P1f+c)

148 >>> Ooops off zoot sock
Posted by: nurse ratched at December 08, 2021 08:41 PM (U2p+3)


Don't forget to turn off the really bright grail shaped beacon too.

Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:44 PM (a1pQd)

149 I have heard of coon cats. Big uns. Hard to believe 40 lb house cat.

Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 08:44 PM (kcdby)

150 >>> 143 Yesterday I put out some food for cats that hang at my mom's retirement home. After I came out of her apartment I saw a trash panda with his dirty paws in the cat food. I swear he shot me the finger when I tried to shoo him away.
Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 08:43 PM (VJ4aP)

I was going to say you should have shot the little bastard but I guess the retirement home management would have disapproved.

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at December 08, 2021 08:44 PM (llON8)

151 More pandas!

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at December 08, 2021 08:44 PM (hVqGz)

152 >>>They want affordable, personal transportation dead.

>I foresee a new era of horse trading and train robbing.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at December 08, 2021 08:45 PM (BPuaD)

153 Jimbo figured out Texas>>Louisiana. Damn fine work for an Aggie.

Posted by: Goliad's Ghosts at December 08, 2021 08:45 PM (oWBc3)

154 @129

Fun fact: domesticated skunks are illegal in California, because rabies vaccines don't work on skunks

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:45 PM (AwPyG)

155 Hey nurse!

Is it raining there? Can you send some this way?

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at December 08, 2021 08:45 PM (llON8)

156 100 smackers was a lot of money in 1991.

I was supposed to be driving back home to NY the next day and it was for gas, food and emergency money for the drive home.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 08, 2021 08:45 PM (Bmy3R)

157 124
The only thing I can think about when I see videos of people with animals in their home is there has to be poop and pee everywhere. I don't think you can train these things like dogs.
Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:39 PM (a1pQd)

There is this broad in my AO who has monkeys and other zoo type animals she keeps at her house and she brings them to skools to teach the utes about them.

I was at her property last year for something or other and her whole house smelt like monkey ass and piss.

She doesn't smell it anymore I figure.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at December 08, 2021 08:45 PM (R/m4+)

158 I think that car jacker was shot on my sideof the river. Turned I-5 into a big mess.

Posted by: Notsothoreau - look forward at December 08, 2021 08:45 PM (YynYJ)

159 Whirling Dervishes - Mr Grinch.


I remember hearing a hair band version of that tune but I cannot remember who did it.

Posted by: Mookie at December 08, 2021 08:45 PM (u+Y3T)

160 All I am saying is you cons, can't out conservative me because, I am a Libertarian and love freedom more than ye all. It's the truth.
Posted by: Rodrigo
___

Bless your heart.

Posted by: SMH while awaiting His return at December 08, 2021 08:46 PM (mVFGK)

161 If it's true that 90% of women all go for the same top 10% of men, well that doesn't seem fair now does it?

I want reparations for my fair share of fair maidens!!

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 08, 2021 08:46 PM (4I/2K)

162 Fun fact: domesticated skunks are illegal in California, because rabies vaccines don't work on skunks
Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:45 PM (AwPyG)


they should jab them with Covid vaxx.

HAHAHAHAHAH!

Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:46 PM (V13WU)

163 I can just see Jimbo eying a huge mountain of money on a table, and thinking, "nah."

heh

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:46 PM (AwPyG)

164 It didn't stay up long, so I wonder if the State Regulators gave them a call to get them to stop educating people.
Posted by: Bete at December 08, 2021 08:42 PM (Ojki1)


IIRC, that is exactly what happened. It became effectively illegal to post tax information where the GenPop might read it and start to think...

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 08:47 PM (hOUT3)

165 One morning there was an animal turd right in the middle of our back porch, so my wife and I rewound the security camera to see what it was.

It was a racoon.

The little fucker had come onto the porch specifically to take that dump. He walked briskly up the steps and marched to the middle of the porch. He did his business. He walked briskly back off.

Posted by: Geronimo Stilton at December 08, 2021 08:47 PM (sGnvY)

166 FUCK JOE BIDEN
Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:40

When we were in Peoria AZ cleaning out the inlaws apt, staying at a La Quinta, I stuck a note that said "Lets Go Brandon" into a sign on the front desk abour supply chain problems. And this was while some Nascar event was going on nearby, guests staying there.

My note was up for about 12 hrs, Jules saw it in the morning when she went down for coffee.

Posted by: Farmer at December 08, 2021 08:47 PM (55Qr6)

167 Did that school have Scotch & Soda teachers, too?
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon


ISWYDT

Posted by: rickb223 at December 08, 2021 08:47 PM (uXonU)

168 You can litterbox train raccoons. I have yet to find a male wild animal that is cool with human males when they grow up and their nuts drop. They see other males as a threat.
Posted by: rickb223 at December 08, 2021 08:42 PM (uXonU)


That applied to a fucking parrot I had. One day you could turn him on his back, scratch his belly, the next day he was trying to remove fingers. Actually sort of unusual, but I think the bird was a psychopath. Was fine with my ex. Tried to remove her grandmother's eye though. Can opener with wings.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:47 PM (wAnMi)

169 Raccoons and squirrels are fine outside a 100 yard radius of Chez GG, inside that, no bueno for them.

Posted by: Goliad's Ghosts at December 08, 2021 08:47 PM (oWBc3)

170 Ooops off zoot sock
Posted by: nurse ratched at December 08, 2021 08:41 PM (U2p+3)

Naughty Zoot sock.

Posted by: flounder at December 08, 2021 08:48 PM (SH2Zi)

171 I was stuck driving in a car for four hours, I was scanning the channels and I just happened to tune into Holsts The Planets Symphony from the beginning, listened to the entire thing, it's about an hour.

Much like Lucas should have cut Akira Kurosawa a share of the royalties from Star Wars, John William, pretty much swiped everything he put into his Star Wars, ET and Close Encounters suites and should throw Holsts family a couple of dollars.

Posted by: Thomas Bender at December 08, 2021 08:48 PM (z24xU)

172 Phil Collins In The Air Tonight is the most cited song by professional athletes to get ready for a game.

Posted by: TC at December 08, 2021 08:21 PM

bestest use of that song was in that one episode of Miami Vice
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 08, 2021 08:23 PM (DUIap)


Before the NFL pushed me away, I used to enjoy going to Ravens games occasionally. They used to play that song at the end of warm-ups.

Here's another great song that was in an episode of Miami Vice. Underrated and underplayed. Russ Ballard - Voices.
https://youtu.be/pqKD-aTckE8

Posted by: Doof at December 08, 2021 08:48 PM (mZUr4)

173 134 Tired of being told what to do by conservatives. Vote Libertarian.
Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 08:39 PM (kcdby)

Yep. Throw away your vote on a bunch of stoners who are just fine with taking in all the world's trash via the mexican border.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (P3gRi)

As opposed to voting for the party of Romney, McConnell, Liz Cheney, George Bush, John McCain and the 13 shitheads who voted for the "infrastructure" bill?

In other words, it's cute that you think you're *not* throwing away your vote.

Posted by: Not Enough Lampposts at December 08, 2021 08:48 PM (F0V01)

174 Gasoline pumps in some states list all the various local, state, and federal taxes. Seems fair to me.

My dad told me about an employer, seems to me it was in Florida, who paid in cash their full wage at one cage, and then they went to different stations and had all the various witholdings and taxes taken out one by one. This was, as you might imagine, very educational. The employer was enjoined by somebody, at the federal level from doing this.

Posted by: Common Tater at December 08, 2021 08:48 PM (n0Iwq)

175 I haven't heard of the Biden dogs lately.
Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 08, 2021 08:41 PM (eGTCV)

Main courses at the Owebama's dinner table

Posted by: BifBewalski @ (IJES/) - at December 08, 2021 08:49 PM (IJES/)

176 Fun fact: domesticated skunks are illegal in California, because rabies vaccines don't work on skunks
Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:45 PM (AwPyG)


They used to be legal - fine by me.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 08, 2021 08:49 PM (wAnMi)

177 143 Yesterday I put out some food for cats that hang at my mom's retirement home. After I came out of her apartment I saw a trash panda with his dirty paws in the cat food. I swear he shot me the finger when I tried to shoo him away.

Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 08:43 PM (VJ4aP)
--------------------

I usually get coons and possums that come on the back porch to eat the cat food. There are several dishes, and the cats don't seem to give a shit. They all get along and eat at the same time. I know most people chase them, but I figure they're hungry and times are tough, so I don't mind. There was a big raccoon sow that used to come here to eat almost every night, I called her Rosemary Cooney. One night I was sitting on the porch and I thought she was going to hop in my f&#$ing lap! Now I drop the food in the dish and go back in the house.

Posted by: Pennsyltucky at December 08, 2021 08:49 PM (lNHqD)

178 In The Air Tonight is about masturbation.

Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 08:49 PM (KAi1n)

179 that black and white cat in the mirror - LOL! that's an old Groucho Marx routine.

Posted by: Tom Servo at December 08, 2021 08:49 PM (evAgx)

180 @171

See the "Sleepytime" episode of the cartoon "Bluey" for an excellent use of "the Planets"

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:50 PM (AwPyG)

181 I want reparations for my fair share of fair maidens!!
Posted by: Count de Monet at December 08, 2021 08:46 PM


Have you considered enrolling in The Paolo University and/or using Axe Bodywash?

Posted by: Duncanthrax at December 08, 2021 08:50 PM (a3Q+t)

182 All I am saying is you cons, can't out conservative me because, I am a Libertarian and love freedom more than ye all. It's the truth.
Posted by: Rodrigo
___

Not judging but just curious about my assumptions about Libertarians. Are you agnostic / atheist. ?

Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 08:51 PM (VJ4aP)

183 You can't keep adult libertarians in the house, either.

Posted by: klaftern at December 08, 2021 08:51 PM (taPSh)

184 Sorry, forty acres and a mule covers all reparations in my freedom loving book.

Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 08:51 PM (kcdby)

185 I've been a big Genesis fan ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke. Before that, I really didn't understand any of their work. Too artsy, too intellectual. It was on Duke where Phil Collins' presence became more apparent.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at December 08, 2021 08:51 PM (vuisn)

186
My dad told me about an employer, seems to me it was in Florida, who paid in cash their full wage at one cage, and then they went to different stations and had all the various witholdings and taxes taken out one by one. This was, as you might imagine, very educational. The employer was enjoined by somebody, at the federal level from doing this.

Posted by: Common Tater at December 08, 2021 08:48 PM


IIRC, Adolph Coors did that at the original Coors brewery

Posted by: AltonJackson at December 08, 2021 08:51 PM (DUIap)

187 Have you considered enrolling in The Paolo University and/or using Axe Bodywash?
Posted by: Duncanthrax at December 08, 2021 08:50 PM (a3Q+t)

I'm a Hai Karate man myself.

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 08, 2021 08:52 PM (4I/2K)

188 I haven't heard of the Biden dogs lately.




Commited suicide. Very sad.

Posted by: runner at December 08, 2021 08:52 PM (V13WU)

189 Fun fact: domesticated skunks are illegal in California, because rabies vaccines don't work on skunks
Posted by: artemis


So they have to keep possums instead, since their body temp is too low for rabies viruses to survive?

Posted by: mikeski at December 08, 2021 08:52 PM (P1f+c)

190 Old Spice is awful, but apparently a lot of men don't think so

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 08:52 PM (AwPyG)

191 In The Air Tonight is about masturbation.
Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 08:49 PM (KAi1n)


Never heard that. So it fits with Turning Japanese, Dancing With Myself, She Bop, etc. OK then.

Posted by: Doof at December 08, 2021 08:52 PM (mZUr4)

192 Atheist, but often proclaim my love of the Catholic Faith. Beautiful religions, both.

Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 08:53 PM (kcdby)

193 Miami Vice made songs like In The Air and I Want to Know What Love Is (Foreigner)as well as Glen Frey's solo career. I'm your vehicle baby!

Posted by: Goliad's Ghosts at December 08, 2021 08:53 PM (oWBc3)

194 Gaslighting LOL headline at ZeroHedge:

"Explosion In New Heart Conditions Dismissed As 'Post Pandemic Stress Disorder'"

Posted by: ShainS -- Let's Poop Brandon! (Non Compos Anus) at December 08, 2021 08:53 PM (FMQfH)

195 Holsts The Planets

-
Mars, The Bringer of War, similar to Ravel's Bolero, starts softly and becomes increasingly loud. My mind's eye sees Hitler's Heinkel He-111 and Junkers Ju-88 approaching London from the Channel.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks Now With Pumpkin Spice! at December 08, 2021 08:53 PM (FVME7)

196 I want reparations for my fair share of fair maidens!!
Posted by: Count de Monet

To be honest, back in the day, I wasn't after the fair ones.

I did grow up though.

I think.


Quizzed the Mrs.

Nope.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 08, 2021 08:54 PM (mD/uy)

197 Goth, hit another number, it's not.

Posted by: Goliad's Ghosts at December 08, 2021 08:54 PM (oWBc3)

198 IIRC, Adolph Coors did that at the original Coors brewery
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 08, 2021 08:51 PM (DUIap)


And got a big slapdown for his informational efforts!

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 08:54 PM (hOUT3)

199 One of them jurors loves Juicy. That's why the got sent home tonight and have to resume tomorrow.

We've all seen the carefully orchestrated and rehearsed courthouse entrances Juicy has done. Every single "news report" has the same staging.

Juicy at the center of an all-black group of a dozen well-dressed people, proud personnas all, chins up, head high, all arms laced together so the group moves as one, black bodyguards in front, same at short distance behind.

Juicy, and his apostles. All carefully choreographed.

Someone on that jury is a regular viewer of The View and MSNBC. The others will not be able to flip this ditz.

Posted by: Mr Gaga at December 08, 2021 08:54 PM (KiBMU)

200 Before that, I really didn't understand any of their work. Too artsy, too intellectual. It was on Duke where Phil Collins' presence became more apparent.
Posted by: Dr. Varno

Me, I'm just a lawnmower.
You can tell by the way I walk.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 08, 2021 08:54 PM (mD/uy)

201 OH, God Damn. Someone talking about Genisus. Saw Phil Collins up close in Boulder Co.

Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 08:55 PM (kcdby)

202 193 Miami Vice made songs like In The Air and I Want to Know What Love Is (Foreigner)as well as Glen Frey's solo career. I'm your vehicle baby!

Posted by: Goliad's Ghosts at December 08, 2021 08:53 PM (oWBc3)

-----

Smuggler's Blues is my favorite Glen Frey solo song, which I assume was written for the show -- and presume was used at some point in it.

Posted by: ShainS -- Let's Poop Brandon! (Non Compos Anus) at December 08, 2021 08:55 PM (FMQfH)

203 >>> My dad told me about an employer, seems to me it was in Florida, who paid in cash their full wage at one cage, and then they went to different stations and had all the various witholdings and taxes taken out one by one. This was, as you might imagine, very educational. The employer was enjoined by somebody, at the federal level from doing this.
Posted by: Common Tater at December 08, 2021 08:48 PM (n0Iwq)


This is how I think, no withholding. Taxes are all due towards the beginning of the year payed in full. The day after is voting and you bring your recept for taxes to the polling place which day is required for you to be able to vote.

Tax Day then Voting Day

And every politician's head is on the block every year.

Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:55 PM (a1pQd)

204 Yep. Throw away your vote on a bunch of stoners who are just fine with taking in all the world's trash via the mexican border.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (P3gRi)


That's the Democrats, man

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 08:55 PM (ZMraq)

205 It's baked right into people's pay stub, but they don't really "get it" nearly so well when they first get a big stack of benjies and then watch the pile get raped by all these various nickle fvcking agencies.

What possible laws are broken by this? Who or what told Coors (or anybody else) they can't do that?

Posted by: Common Tater at December 08, 2021 08:57 PM (n0Iwq)

206 That's the Democrats, man
Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 08:55 PM (ZMraq)

The Libertarians are just a Dem stalking horse to siphon votes away from the GOP, which is not really conservative at all.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 08:57 PM (P3gRi)

207 Let Smollet go, let every jury everywhere know nothing matters. Let's get this on people.

Posted by: Goliad's Ghosts at December 08, 2021 08:57 PM (oWBc3)

208 Miami Vice made songs like In The Air and I Want to Know What Love Is (Foreigner)as well as Glen Frey's solo career. I'm your vehicle baby!
Posted by: Goliad's Ghosts at December 08, 2021 08:53 PM (oWBc3)


Kenny Chesney covering "I Want to Know What Love Is". If you like Kenny Chesney (as I do), you'll probably enjoy it. Others will probably hate it.
https://youtu.be/BFXT4w5lF7I

Posted by: Doof at December 08, 2021 08:58 PM (mZUr4)

209 Mars, The Bringer of War, similar to Ravel's Bolero, starts softly and becomes increasingly loud.

=====

The "Appian Way" movement from Respighi's Pines of Rome is another one like that - the climax is dazzling.

Posted by: Geronimo Stilton at December 08, 2021 08:58 PM (sGnvY)

210 Mars, Bringer of War.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cXOanvv4plU

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks Now With Pumpkin Spice! at December 08, 2021 08:58 PM (FVME7)

211 Posted by: Goliad's Ghosts at December 08, 2021 08:53 PM (oWBc3)

The lure of easy money,
it has a very strong appeal!

Posted by: Zombie Glen Frye at December 08, 2021 08:58 PM (hOUT3)

212 Everyone seen that kid running into the trash cans set to the opening of In the Air Tonight? Cracks me up every time. I'll see if I can find it.

Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:59 PM (a1pQd)

213 hmmm mm hmm, nice lookin' appetizer up top...

Posted by: Barry at December 08, 2021 08:59 PM (Rbu5d)

214 Someone on that jury is a regular viewer of The View and MSNBC. The others will not be able to flip this ditz.
Posted by: Mr Gaga at December 08, 2021 08:54 PM (KiBMU)

Jussie is a fellow Master Thespian. Acting!

Posted by: Jon Lovitz at December 08, 2021 08:59 PM (4I/2K)

215 What possible laws are broken by this? Who or what told Coors (or anybody else) they can't do that?
Posted by: Common Tater at December 08, 2021 08:57 PM (n0Iwq)

FWIW, gas pumps in Alberta all have a printed notice that says "X cents of the price of every liter goes to provincial tax, and Y cents goes to Federal tax". Been that way for years.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 08:59 PM (P3gRi)

216 Cat funny:

https://tinyurl.com/3rnkbw6u

Posted by: Boswell at December 08, 2021 08:59 PM (5iUNf)

217 ZOD IMPERIAL.

Posted by: ZOD at December 08, 2021 09:00 PM (M3Z2J)

218 What possible laws are broken by this? Who or what told Coors (or anybody else) they can't do that?
Posted by: Common Tater at December 08, 2021 08:57 PM (n0Iwq)

IIRC, it was FDR's IRS goons.

"Perhaps we need to look carefully at your Coors books comrade Adolph, da?"

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:00 PM (hOUT3)

219 Libertarians are for freedom. Learn to take care of your own self.

Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 09:00 PM (kcdby)

220 You actually can't get better than Pam Grier at any age backdropped by I Want to Know What Love Is but in 85 or so, melt steel hot.

Posted by: Goliad's Ghosts at December 08, 2021 09:00 PM (oWBc3)

221 -
Stop it, stop it, stop it. That's enough. I've heard of this. CAT JUGGLING! How much money do you need?

Posted by: Navin R. Johnson at December 08, 2021 09:00 PM (BB7pQ)

222
anyone remember Phil Collins' song about illegal mexicans?

The music video was amusing.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at December 08, 2021 09:01 PM (2u35I)

223 Let Smollet go, let every jury everywhere know nothing matters.

-
Burn, Loot, Murder has got your back.

Guy Benson
@guypbenson
National BLM organization statement on Smollett: "In our commitment to [police] abolition, we can never believe police...over Jussie Smollett, a Black man who has been courageously present, visible, and vocal in the struggle for Black freedom."

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks Now With Pumpkin Spice! at December 08, 2021 09:02 PM (FVME7)

224 Foreigner. "Hot blooded" and "I want to know" should be stricken from the record. Good lord.

Posted by: Common Tater at December 08, 2021 09:02 PM (n0Iwq)

225 129 Christmas music Mt. Rushmore. I have odd tastes, so mine are: "Back Door Santa" by Clarence Carter, "

How's that go? "I saw Mommy backdooring Santa Claus"???

Posted by: Tom Servo at December 08, 2021 09:02 PM (evAgx)

226 I lean libertarian, but actual libertarians are wack.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 09:02 PM (EfigE)

227 Country trash pandas take many .22 rounds to quit being a pest. The one hanging round our joint is an easy 30 pounder.

He's got 3 or 4 slugs in him, but keeps on truckin'.

Fucking bastard. We've been at war for years. I've suddenly started to feel very Russian.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at December 08, 2021 09:02 PM (BFigT)

228 willowed:

https://tinyurl.com/2p8vx3ky

Posted by: Boswell at December 08, 2021 09:02 PM (5iUNf)

229 Not judging but just curious about my assumptions about Libertarians. Are you agnostic / atheist. ?
Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 08:51 PM (VJ4aP)


Just as there is a Big Five personality trait cluster for conservatives and liberals, there is also a cluster of personality traits for libertarians.

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 09:03 PM (ZMraq)

230 Here's a vid:

https://youtu.be/lb7AmOwrysc

The original is gone probably over copyright bullshit. This one isn't as good and has a gorilla playing drums after the kid. Why? I don't know.

Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 09:03 PM (a1pQd)

231 What possible laws are broken by this? Who or what told Coors (or anybody else) they can't do that?
Posted by: Common Tater


*Puts on bureaucratic-thinking hat ..... IQ drops 62 points*

Well, all of your employees are now handling money during these government-required transactions. Are your employees all licensed accountants? No? Well, that looks very bad.....

*Removes hat ..... remembers own name*

Posted by: mikeski at December 08, 2021 09:03 PM (P1f+c)

232
btw, for all you saying Helen Mirren still looks good, you need your eyes examined for Old Bag Cataracts Disease.

She looks like a wrinkly hag.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at December 08, 2021 09:03 PM (2u35I)

233 I'm reading a terrific novel, "The Star of the Sea," set on a leaking 70-year-old ship in 1857, making the Atlantic crossing to America, the steerage passengers all starving Irish fleeing the famine. God-awful conditions on board.

My great-grandmother survived a crossing like that, ten years later, sailing with an uncle, her only surviving family member. He died during the 25-day passage.

We can't imagine how painful death by starvation is.

Posted by: Mr Gaga at December 08, 2021 09:04 PM (KiBMU)

234 Still at zero total Omicron deaths worldwide per the MSM and WHO btw.
Posted by: Moron Robbie

They lose me at open borders and privatizing all city services.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 09:04 PM (EfigE)

235 Well, that was a copy paste fail

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 09:04 PM (EfigE)

236 In The Air Tonight is about masturbation.
Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 08:49 PM (KAi1n)

Never heard that. So it fits with Turning Japanese, Dancing With Myself, She Bop, etc. OK then.
Posted by: Doof at December 08, 2021 08:52 PM (mZUr4)

Billion Dollar Babies FTW!

Posted by: Pug Mahon, from Butte, America at December 08, 2021 09:05 PM (x8Wzq)

237 >>229 Not judging but just curious about my assumptions about Libertarians. Are you agnostic / atheist.? Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 08:51 PM (VJ4aP)

Your assumptions are probably a mess.

Posted by: ZOD at December 08, 2021 09:05 PM (M3Z2J)

238 This is how I think, no withholding. Taxes are all due towards the beginning of the year payed in full. The day after is voting and you bring your recept for taxes to the polling place which day is required for you to be able to vote.

Tax Day then Voting Day

And every politician's head is on the block every year.
Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:55 PM (a1pQd)

Posted by: CaliGirl at December 08, 2021 09:05 PM (6z9vr)

239
Libertarians are for freedom. Learn to take care of your own self.
Posted by: Rodrigo


lolol

Libertarians are phony dickheads who are the first in line to vote for More Govt Teet.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at December 08, 2021 09:05 PM (2u35I)

240 I always liked Grace Jones and "Pull Up To The Bumper".

She was one of a kind.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at December 08, 2021 09:05 PM (R/m4+)

241 Geez, people, let's get on this! We're falling further and further behind!

Pfizer CEO says fourth COVID vaccine dose might be needed earlier than anticipated

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks Now With Pumpkin Spice! at December 08, 2021 09:05 PM (FVME7)

242 Someone on that jury is a regular viewer of The View and MSNBC. The others will not be able to flip this ditz.
Posted by: Mr Gaga at December 08, 2021 08:54 PM (KiBMU)

yep, I've been pondering that - the case, legally, is a slam dunk, but one black racist on the jury can kill the whole thing.

We hate to admit it, but our jury system can't work in a tribalist society.

Posted by: Tom Servo at December 08, 2021 09:06 PM (evAgx)

243 She looks like a wrinkly hag.
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at December 08, 2021 09:03 PM (2u35I)


Comrade, you obviously do not understand perspective!

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:06 PM (hOUT3)

244 Helen Mirren was terrific in "The Cook, The Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover." Lotsa nudity.

Posted by: Mr Gaga at December 08, 2021 09:06 PM (KiBMU)

245 Albino raccoon is cute.

Posted by: Flyover at December 08, 2021 09:06 PM (Rbu5d)

246 Libertarians are for freedom. Learn to take care of your own self.
Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08,


It is a great idea, but ultimately fails due to human nature. Just as socialism does.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 09:06 PM (EfigE)

247 Pre-Phil Collins Genesis is actually very good. Definitely different than Collins Genesis. Unfortunately, Collins became a wanna-be crooner who was deservedly (and brilliantly) mocked on South Park.

Posted by: Mookie at December 08, 2021 09:06 PM (u+Y3T)

248 Libertarians are for freedom. Learn to take care of your own self.
Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 09:00 PM (kcdby)

Well, you don't have worry about me shooting you, and taking all your stuff. Your stuff ain't worth shit. I checked. I could do better at the "free" pile behind Goodwill.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 09:06 PM (P3gRi)

249 Libertarians are phony dickheads who are the first in line to vote for More Govt Teet.
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at December 08, 2021 09:05 PM (2u35I)


But only for the right people and causes, comrade Sooth!

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:07 PM (hOUT3)

250 btw, for all you saying Helen Mirren still looks good, you need your eyes examined for Old Bag Cataracts Disease.

She looks like a wrinkly hag.


I would love her so vigorously she'd need new artificial hips.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at December 08, 2021 09:07 PM (QU5/8)

251 Libertarians: Donald Trump didn't ring in a pure libertarian utopia his first day in office, so Orangemanbad, vote for joe biden!

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 09:08 PM (EfigE)

252 Libertarians are for pot. And then for smoking that pot and sitting around and talking about dumb shit and thinking they are the smartest people in the world.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 08, 2021 09:08 PM (7cRTM)

253 232
btw, for all you saying Helen Mirren still looks good, you need your eyes examined for Old Bag Cataracts Disease.

She looks like a wrinkly hag.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at December 08, 2021 09:03 PM (2u35I)
------------------

Yes, but would still smash because Helen Mirren. As far as the over-70 crowd, though, crazy old Susan Sarandon is still the class of the field.

Posted by: Pennsyltucky at December 08, 2021 09:08 PM (lNHqD)

254 It is a great idea, but ultimately fails due to human nature. Just as socialism does.
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 09:06 PM (EfigE)

the idea of "freedom" falls apart when it turns into "Everybody in the world should be free to run across our southern borders".

Posted by: Tom Servo at December 08, 2021 09:08 PM (evAgx)

255 I dunno, AOP, that sounds like all the parties any more. Of course, I am in Oregon so there is no hope that a Democrat will do anything but win.

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 09:08 PM (ZMraq)

256 She looks like a wrinkly hag.
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales

Perhaps true but I'm a wrinkly old hag.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 08, 2021 09:08 PM (mD/uy)

257 >>> How's that go? "I saw Mommy backdooring Santa Claus"???


I saw Santa backdooring Mommy

Posted by: fluffy at December 08, 2021 09:08 PM (UnQlg)

258 Albino raccoon is cute.
Posted by: Flyover at December 08, 2021 09:06

I think that would be a good name for a bluegrass band.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 08, 2021 09:08 PM (eGTCV)

259 Throw away your vote on a bunch of stoners who are just fine with taking in all the world's trash via the mexican border.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 08:40 PM (P3gRi)

That's the Democrats, man
Posted by: Kindltot

That's an actual plank in the Libertarian Party Platform.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 08, 2021 09:08 PM (uXonU)

260 >>privatizing all city services. Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 09:04 PM (EfigE)

Living through the first three days of this would be a hopeful, amusing goat-fuck. After that, not so much.

Posted by: ZOD at December 08, 2021 09:08 PM (M3Z2J)

261 Bread Bacon Butter!

Posted by: Joking Joe at December 08, 2021 09:09 PM (BPuaD)

262 We hate to admit it, but our jury system can't work in a tribalist society.
Posted by: Tom Servo at December 08, 2021 09:06 PM (evAgx)


Please to report to HR for the Intersectional Gender and Tribal Equity courses!

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:09 PM (hOUT3)

263 36
Why am I only finding out now about Mike Hammer's aneurism?
Keep me in the loop with these things, please
Posted by: Soothsayer -- "fuck around and find out" at December 08, 2021 08:15 PM (2u35I)

WHAT? Oh, no. Prayers up!

Posted by: Flyover at December 08, 2021 09:09 PM (Rbu5d)

264 anyone remember Phil Collins' song about illegal mexicans?
The music video was amusing.
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at December 08, 2021 09:01 PM (2u35I)

It's no fun being an illegal alien!

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at December 08, 2021 09:09 PM (R/m4+)

265
Fucking bastard. We've been at war for years. I've suddenly started to feel very Russian.
Posted by: Martini Farmer at December 08, 2021 09:02 PM (BFigT)

I've his fucking twin sister. You need a coyote sized live trap, bait it with cat food. Anchor it down with tent stakes so he cannot use violence to overturn it and get loose. Once you got him, .22 through the ears. OR. you could tske him no less than 25 miles away, preferably across a river and give him to an HOA neighborhood. I introduced his sister to under water swimming while in the trap.

Posted by: BifBewalski @ (IJES/) - at December 08, 2021 09:09 PM (IJES/)

266 Remember 'scary vision' with barbra streisand? that was epic.

And Kanye got the works, too

Posted by: artemis at December 08, 2021 09:10 PM (AwPyG)

267 Libertarian Party

3.4 Free Trade and Migration
We support the removal of governmental impediments to free trade. Political freedom and escape from tyranny demand that individuals not be unreasonably constrained by government in the crossing of political boundaries. Economic freedom demands the unrestricted movement of human as well as financial capital across national borders.

https://www.lp.org/platform/

Posted by: rickb223 at December 08, 2021 09:10 PM (uXonU)

268 Your assumptions are probably a mess.
Posted by: ZOD at December 08, 2021 09:05 PM (M3Z2J

Since he said he was an atheist not that big of a mess.

Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 09:10 PM (VJ4aP)

269 Good evening, Horde!

Posted by: Ladyl at December 08, 2021 09:10 PM (TdMsT)

270 257 >>> How's that go? "I saw Mommy backdooring Santa Claus"???
I saw Santa backdooring Mommy
Posted by: fluffy at December 08, 2021 09:08 PM (UnQlg)


Are you a closet genderist?

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:11 PM (hOUT3)

271 246 Libertarians are for freedom. Learn to take care of your own self.
Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08,


It is a great idea, but ultimately fails due to human nature. Just as socialism does.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 09:06 PM (EfigE)
----------------------

Libertarianism would work if and only if you first completely dismantle and destroy the regulatory, bureaucratic and welfare state apparatus. Trying to paste Libertarian ideas on top of them just gets you more of them.

Posted by: Pennsyltucky at December 08, 2021 09:11 PM (lNHqD)

272 It's no fun being an illegal alien!
Posted by: Hairyback Guy at December 08, 2021 09:09 PM (R/m4+)

Might have been the case back in Eisenhower's day, but nowadays, they everything handed to them on a silver platter.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 09:11 PM (P3gRi)

273 45 It's a month since I quit cigarettes. Haven't gone back. Yet.
Posted by: Eeyore at December 08, 2021 08:16 PM (7X3UV)

Congratulations! you can do it.

Posted by: Flyover at December 08, 2021 09:11 PM (Rbu5d)

274 -
btw, for all you saying Helen Mirren still looks good, you need your eyes examined for Old Bag Cataracts Disease..
She looks like a wrinkly hag.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at December 08, 2021 09:03 PM - -
- -------

It seems your eyes see even less than those of us with "Old Bag Cataracts Disease", as you put it. Sad.

Posted by: irright at December 08, 2021 09:11 PM (BB7pQ)

275 {{{Ladyl}}}
Another wonderful day for you I hope!

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:11 PM (hOUT3)

276 Mike Hammer had an aneurism? How is he? Has anyone heard?

Posted by: Ladyl at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (TdMsT)

277 >>> In The Air Tonight is about masturbation.
Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 08:49 PM (KAi1n)

Never heard that. So it fits with Turning Japanese, Dancing With Myself, She Bop, etc. OK then.
Posted by: Doof at December 08, 2021 08:52 PM (mZUr4)

Billion Dollar Babies FTW!
Posted by: Pug Mahon, from Butte, America at December 08, 2021 09:05 PM (x8Wzq)


THIS IS FUNNY BECAUSE PHIL IS LITERALLY SAYING I CAN FEEL IT COMING IN THE AIR TONIGHT OOOOOHHHH

Posted by: BEN ROETHLISBERGER at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (a1pQd)

278 It's a month since I quit cigarettes. Haven't gone back. Yet.
Posted by: Eeyore at December 08, 2021 08:16 PM (7X3UV)

Congratulations! you can do it.
Posted by: Flyover at December 08, 2021 09:11 PM (Rbu5d)

One day I will drink my last beer but not this day.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (eGTCV)

279 O/T but not banworthy: I'm saving up the glass jars that various food products come in (mostly tomater sauce but also artichokes and such) because I want to fill them with water and store them for when the H20 runs out or is cut off. Problem is, I can't get the lids sufficiently clean and they end up stinking. Is there a source of clean lids I can obtain for these jars or is there a sufficient way to clean them? (I rinse the lids and run them through the dishwasher a lot but it just doesn't seem to work. The glass jars themselves get clean easily.)

Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (KAi1n)

280 Mike Hammer had an aneurism? How is he? Has anyone heard?
Posted by: Ladyl at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (TdMsT)

He has posted here since. He is in rehab, and expects to be for some time.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (P3gRi)

281 I've CAUGHT his fucking twin sister.


Fuck you autocucumber

Posted by: BifBewalski @ (IJES/) - at December 08, 2021 09:14 PM (IJES/)

282 >>Since he said he was an atheist not that big of a mess. Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 09:10 PM (VJ4aP)

That big of a mess.

Kneel.

Posted by: ZOD at December 08, 2021 09:14 PM (M3Z2J)

283 >>a sufficient way to clean them? (I rinse the lids and run them through the dishwasher a lot but it just doesn't seem to work. The glass jars themselves get clean easily.) Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (KAi1n)

Bleached water, then rinse.

Posted by: ZOD at December 08, 2021 09:15 PM (M3Z2J)

284 One day I will drink my last beer but not this day.
Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (eGTCV)


More practical Horde wisdom...

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:15 PM (hOUT3)

285 Have you tried soaking the lids in bleach?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at December 08, 2021 09:16 PM (63Dwl)

286 276 Mike Hammer had an aneurism? How is he? Has anyone heard?
Posted by: Ladyl

Fen said he's getting rehab for it
I hope he's doing well

Posted by: vmom - link to Red's fundraiser at December 08, 2021 09:18 PM (FcPY7)

287 Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (KAi1n)

You have a problem with gallon jugs of water you can buy in a store for 99 cents?

Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 09:18 PM (VJ4aP)

288 Posted by: rickb223 at December 08, 2021 09:10 PM (uXonU)

Well, be happy they are in total agreement with every other party then

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 09:18 PM (ZMraq)

289 Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (KAi1n)

Ball canning jars are cheap and come with clean, sealing lids. If I were going to store water for any period of time, I would probably put it through a sterile canning process.

I have 2 deep artesian wells and multiple free flowing springs on my property.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 08, 2021 09:18 PM (EfigE)

290 "Wil Wheaton call s Dave Chappelle ...."

Shut up Wesley!!

Posted by: Pleistocene Megafauna at December 08, 2021 09:19 PM (aoFfE)

291 O/T but not banworthy: I'm saving up the glass jars that various food products come in (mostly tomater sauce but also artichokes and such) because I want to fill them with water and store them for when the H20 runs out or is cut off. Problem is, I can't get the lids sufficiently clean and they end up stinking. Is there a source of clean lids I can obtain for these jars or is there a sufficient way to clean them? (I rinse the lids and run them through the dishwasher a lot but it just doesn't seem to work. The glass jars themselves get clean easily.)
Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (KAi1n)

Seriously, if you want to hoard water, quart-size glass jars are about the worst way to do it. Risk of breakage (you are in earthquake country man!), plus the form factor and thickness of the glass means you need more space to store less water. See if you can find some of those cube-shaped water bladders used for camping.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 09:19 PM (P3gRi)

292 279 O/T but not banworthy: I'm saving up the glass jars that various food products come in (mostly tomater sauce but also artichokes and such) because I want to fill them with water and store them for when the H20 runs out or is cut off. Problem is, I can't get the lids sufficiently clean and they end up stinking. Is there a source of clean lids I can obtain for these jars or is there a sufficient way to clean them? (I rinse the lids and run them through the dishwasher a lot but it just doesn't seem to work. The glass jars themselves get clean easily.)
Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (KAi1n)

just fyi, it's a lot more efficient use of space to save some 1 gallon bottled water bottles - the hard plastic ones, not the soft plastic, they don't leach as much into the water (giving it a funny taste if it sits too long)

as far as cleaning a lid, can't beat the brillo pad.

Posted by: Tom Servo at December 08, 2021 09:19 PM (evAgx)

293 Mike Hammer. Take care, my brother.

Posted by: Pleistocene Megafauna at December 08, 2021 09:20 PM (aoFfE)

294 Love pre-Collins Genesis. Amazing they could find a record company for that.

Posted by: Caliban at December 08, 2021 09:20 PM (HgGBT)

295
...is there a sufficient way to clean them?
Posted by: SFGoth


Doubt it.
But if it's for emergencies, you're probably not going to care if your water smells like artichokes.

I'd be more worried about keeping the water fresh from bacteria. Light accelerates that sort of stuff, I think.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at December 08, 2021 09:21 PM (2u35I)

296 Is there a source of clean lids I can obtain for these jars or is there a sufficient way to clean them? (I rinse the lids and run them through the dishwasher a lot but it just doesn't seem to work. The glass jars themselves get clean easily.)
Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (KAi1n)


Filllmore Container

https://www.fillmorecontainer.com/

Do yourself a favor and get 2 Liter soda bottles if you can, they are pretty stable and they make crates to stack them in

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 09:22 PM (ZMraq)

297 ..Have you tried soaking the lids in bleach?
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at December 08, 2021 09:16 PM (63Dwl)


Wasn't that what Juicy's Nigerian "attackers" were trying to do?


Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at December 08, 2021 09:22 PM (QzJWU)

298 Groooooooooooooot!

America Rising
@AmericaRising
Mayor Lori Lightfoot blames smash and grab robberies on retailers.

The retails are "not doing enough," according to the Mayor.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks Now With Pumpkin Spice! at December 08, 2021 09:22 PM (FVME7)

299 >>Is there a source of clean lids I can obtain for these jars or is there a sufficient way to clean them?

No. The Waterlessness Epoch is designed so that Others May Live, But You Must Fail.

Make your time.

Posted by: ZOD at December 08, 2021 09:23 PM (M3Z2J)

300 Do yourself a favor and get 2 Liter soda bottles if you can, they are pretty stable and they make crates to stack them in

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 09:22 PM (ZMraq)

Wine boxes might work. Rinse them out well, fill with water. Stackable, and they have valves.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 09:24 PM (P3gRi)

301 Wally and several grocers sell five gallon jugs.
Some of brands do not have screw on caps.
Water will keep, sanitary, in those jugs for a year or better.

Posted by: Braenyard at December 08, 2021 09:25 PM (CLRL3)

302 You can always boil small jars and lids. *looks at home made survival kit...

yea... boil them for an hour. Don't touch until cool.

*reads more...
or just, you know, buy a couple gallons of distilled water because using water to make shit clean enough to store water is sort of stupid.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at December 08, 2021 09:25 PM (BFigT)

303 Do yourself a favor and get 2 Liter soda bottles if you can, they are pretty stable and they make crates to stack them in

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 09:22 PM (ZMraq)

This. Clean and dry well. Fill and add a few drops of bleach. Storing anything in glass jars in bulk on top of a fault line seems like a recipe for disappointment and a huge mess.

Posted by: flounder at December 08, 2021 09:26 PM (SH2Zi)

304 One day I will drink my last beer but not this day.
Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM


There was a day I thought that, too.

Posted by: zombie Hold my Beer at December 08, 2021 09:27 PM (a3Q+t)

305 Had my last cigarette at 2:30 in the afternoon on august 27th 2013 right before i went into the cardiologist office. turns out i was having a non stemi heart attack over the course of 4 days. every time i went to the hospital the ekg would show nothing. it just so happened that i was not feeling great at the office and after the echo was done she said i was having a heart attack at the time. luckily my mother was there with me. The doc said she should take me because the ambo would take to long. Next morning stent in lad. NO MORE OF THOSE CANCER STICKS SINCE

Posted by: Theos at December 08, 2021 09:27 PM (Q+UiE)

306 The two liters or one gallon juicers can be placed in a closet and with 1/2" plywood on top will support many pounds of storage.

The weight is displaced across all the bottles.

Posted by: Braenyard at December 08, 2021 09:27 PM (CLRL3)

307 1. Get thirsty.
2. Locate someone with water.
3. Kill them. Take their water.
4. Drink.
5. Repeat.

The Burning Times are gonna be hard for some.

Posted by: ZOD at December 08, 2021 09:29 PM (M3Z2J)

308 Put bleach in a plastic container? Wouldn't that allow leaching. The chlorine in tap water is more than sufficient.

Posted by: Braenyard at December 08, 2021 09:29 PM (CLRL3)

309 https://www.fillmorecontainer.com/

Oooh, that looks cool.

The retailers aren't doing enough because by remaining in business they constitute attractive nuisances. What she means is that they need to flee Chicago.

Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:29 PM (KAi1n)

310 The retails are "not doing enough," according to the Mayor.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks Now With Pumpkin Spice! at December 08, 2021 09:22 PM (FVME7)


So "Rooftop Koreans" are in again?

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:30 PM (hOUT3)

311 Part of me just hates tossing perfectly good glass jars. There's gotta be some way to "re-purpose" (I hate that word) them.

Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:30 PM (KAi1n)

312 If you really want to get serious, you can buy a few used 300 gal totes. They come in plastic (cheap) or stainless steel (expensive).

If you can find ones that previous contained water treatment chemicals, those would be best. Anything else and you need to clean the ever loving shit out of them.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 08, 2021 09:30 PM (7cRTM)

313 Kill person stealing water, take his weapons and other possessions.

Posted by: Braenyard at December 08, 2021 09:30 PM (CLRL3)

314 "Politics is the means used by men without principles to rule men without memory."
-- Voltaire

Posted by: Duncanthrax at December 08, 2021 09:30 PM (a3Q+t)

315 If I were prepping for a disaster, I'd just buy flats of half-liter drinking water, say enough for 90 days for drinking and cooking. Wash water, and toilet flushing water could be stored in 55 gallon plastic barrels.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 09:31 PM (P3gRi)

316 Wine boxes might work. Rinse them out well, fill with water. Stackable, and they have valves.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 09:24 PM (P3gRi)


I have always wanted a use for empty wine boxes. Starbux has a form of them too. They seemed to clever to just toss after a single use

However, if I were really concerned about water storage I would look into mounting 3" piping between the studs of an interior wall. Rigged up right you could purge it twice a year.

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 09:32 PM (ZMraq)

317 Put bleach in a plastic container? Wouldn't that allow leaching. The chlorine in tap water is more than sufficient.

Posted by: Braenyard at December 08, 2021 09:29 PM (CLRL3)

I am not sure what the concern about leeching is or if it is even valid. Adding a few drops of unscented pure bleach to 2L is not much of a concern, and the chlorine added to tap water is at such a low level and far upstream so as to likely be insufficient to ensure purity in long-term storage. It is standard prepper guidance, and you'll want to be able to drink/use your emergency storage water in an emergency, not worry about further preparation or purification. YMMV.

Posted by: flounder at December 08, 2021 09:32 PM (SH2Zi)

318 Water comes in food rated plastic containers and will basically last last forever.

I always have 30 cases of bottled water that I rotate. I drink probably 5 to 6 bottles a day on average.

Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 09:33 PM (VJ4aP)

319 >>> Part of me just hates tossing perfectly good glass jars. There's gotta be some way to "re-purpose" (I hate that word) them.
Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:30 PM (KAi1n)


That's what we're for!

Posted by: buttons, washers, and a menagerie of odd fasteners at December 08, 2021 09:33 PM (a1pQd)

320 https://twitter.com/Animewanger/status/1468573151621701639

Posted by: BourbonChicken at December 08, 2021 09:33 PM (ybIRR)

321 145...Quiche Bichon Frise.
Posted by: Barack H. Obama at December 08, 2021 08:44 PM (wAnMi)

Ba-ROCK, you better have arugula with that!

Posted by: Big Mike at December 08, 2021 09:33 PM (Rbu5d)

322 144 All I am saying is you cons, can't out conservative me because, I am a Libertarian and love freedom more than ye all. It's the truth.
Posted by: Rodrigo at December 08, 2021 08:43 PM (kcdby)

The problem is that Libertarians believe freedom exists simply for the asking and never, ever needs to be fought for, ever. (Probably from all the pot-smoking; that saps ambition.) America will never be weak enough or whiny enough for them.

I knew one who sincerely believed that we brought Pearl Harbor on ourselves, and that the first thing we needed to do after Pearl was to apologize to the Japanese. "We shoulda been like Switzerland! Make money off the Germans AND the Japanese and sell them whatever they wanted! It wasn't our fight!" And he wonders why I'm not all that interested in talking to him since grad school.

Posted by: Snake Spirit at December 08, 2021 09:33 PM (mFLaN)

323 Love pre-Collins Genesis. Amazing they could find a record company for that.

Posted by: Caliban at December 08, 2021 09:20 PM

Do you mean pre-Collins as lead singer, or are you only referring to the first two albums?

Posted by: Rusty Nail at December 08, 2021 09:34 PM (G6DU0)

324 Part of me just hates tossing perfectly good glass jars. There's gotta be some way to "re-purpose" (I hate that word) them.

Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:30 PM (KAi1n)

Throw them on the ground; repurpose them as sand.

Posted by: flounder at December 08, 2021 09:34 PM (SH2Zi)

325 Part of me just hates tossing perfectly good glass jars. There's gotta be some way to "re-purpose" (I hate that word) them.
Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:30 PM (KAi1n)

Some brands of spaghetti sauce come in actual canning jars with threads that are compatible with Ball or Mason bands and lids.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 09:34 PM (P3gRi)

326 I stopped drinking tequila sophomore year in college. Look, if anyone here loves the stuff, fine, but I can't get anywhere near it and that's just the smell alone. Then there's the taste. Not even in a margarita (or margaritax as the woke kids say these days (I'm sure)).

Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:34 PM (KAi1n)

327 I've drunk water stored for a year in a two liter bottle.
No problem.

Posted by: Braenyard at December 08, 2021 09:35 PM (CLRL3)

328 Lol! We did sell things to the Germans and the Japanese, right up until the last minute. IBM created Germany's concentration camp prisoner tracking system.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 08, 2021 09:35 PM (7cRTM)

329 Some brands of spaghetti sauce come in actual canning jars with threads that are compatible with Ball or Mason bands and lids.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 08, 2021 09:34 PM (P3gRi)

Storing pasta in the jars is an option.

Posted by: Just a side note at December 08, 2021 09:36 PM (VJ4aP)

330 Craigslist is absolutely crammed with offers for the 275 gal., steel-cage, plastic bodied "totes", many of which are Food-Grade, and short of a new sanitizing, are ready to go.

They come with either galvanized steel, or sometimes, stainless.

The galvanized ones seem to start at around $100, which on a price per gallon and safe storage capability, is dirt cheap. If you're in a rural setting, build a tower to hold one up eight, ten, twelve feet in the air, and then build a structure around it, to keep out the light. The elevation, combined with a connection to your house's water supply side lines, well, you wouldn't lack for water pressure, even if the Mains are out. Just remember to install a shutoff valve on the mains.

Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at December 08, 2021 09:36 PM (QzJWU)

331 An older, unemployed homeless guy lit the Fox tree on fire?

Andrew or Chris?

Posted by: The Gipper Lives at December 08, 2021 09:37 PM (nfLT0)

332 Posted by: BourbonChicken at December 08, 2021 09:33 PM (ybIRR)

BourbonChicken is the Man!

Posted by: The Margins at December 08, 2021 09:37 PM (mE8HP)

333 I won dozens of bottles of water and soda in Safeway's last Monopoly game. They're all stored in the basement for when TSHTF. (The sh*t hitting the street is different.)

Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:38 PM (KAi1n)

334 328 Lol! We did sell things to the Germans and the Japanese, right up until the last minute. IBM created Germany's concentration camp prisoner tracking system.
Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 08, 2021 09:35 PM (7cRTM)


Hollerith cards, IIRC?

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:38 PM (hOUT3)

335 That's what we're for!
Posted by: buttons, washers, and a menagerie of odd fasteners at December 08, 2021 09:33 PM (a1pQd)
==========

Nail the lid under a shelf and let those jars hang.

Posted by: Braenyard at December 08, 2021 09:38 PM (CLRL3)

336 Twelvepack ....but beer will go bad after a time in my fortified bunker. So maybe vodka or whiskey.

It would only be used on special occasions or emergencies. Getting laid is special

Good name for a drink would be....Pillow Talk

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at December 08, 2021 09:38 PM (yw6Sq)

337
'Sup, jackelopes?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at December 08, 2021 09:39 PM (3l5Yq)

338 DUBAI, United Arab Emirates (AP) Saudi authorities have conducted their biggest-ever crackdown on camel beauty contestants that received Botox injections and other artificial touch-ups, the state-run Saudi Press Agency reported Wednesday, with over 40 camels disqualified from the annual pageant.

Now do vaginoplasties

Posted by: rhennigantx at December 08, 2021 09:40 PM (yrol0)

339
An older, unemployed homeless guy lit the Fox tree on fire?

Andrew or Chris?
Posted by: The Gipper Lives


Allahpundit

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at December 08, 2021 09:41 PM (3l5Yq)

340
Good name for a drink would be....Pillow Talk
Posted by: Humphreyrobot


How Do You Like Me So Far?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at December 08, 2021 09:42 PM (3l5Yq)

341 I use old glass jars to store my urine. Each one is meticulously labeled with a date/time stamp and testing notes. Reduces water usage cause I don't have flush unless it's brown.

Posted by: Piss Collector at December 08, 2021 09:42 PM (QU5/8)

342 Love pre-Collins Genesis. Amazing they could find a record company for that.

Posted by: Caliban at December 08, 2021 09:20 PM


Squonk - from A Trick of the Take
https://youtu.be/TzL-up4ZKgI

Squonk would be a great nic

Posted by: Doof at December 08, 2021 09:43 PM (mZUr4)

343 Hollerith cards, IIRC?
Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:38 PM (hOUT3)

I think so, but the Germans got a custom system. We were also Japan's primary source of oil until they invaded China. Half the country thought Hitler was brilliant reformer until he invaded Poland and the news of all the evil shit started coming out.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 08, 2021 09:44 PM (7cRTM)

344 326 I stopped drinking tequila sophomore year in college. Look, if anyone here loves the stuff, fine, but I can't get anywhere near it and that's just the smell alone. Then there's the taste. Not even in a margarita (or margaritax as the woke kids say these days (I'm sure)).
Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:34 PM (KAi1n)

I like Tequila, but my wife can have one sip of it and it'll give her a bad 3 day headache. So she won't touch it either.

Tequila straight always does a thing to me where it makes the muscles on the inside of my cheeks start to contract and twitch - don't know if that happens to other people. I don't drink it very often.

as to water storage - I started thinking about it seriously this last winter when our cities water got turned off for 6 days thanks to the Great Freeze and a clusterfuck of errors by our municipal water system.

Posted by: Tom Servo at December 08, 2021 09:44 PM (evAgx)

345 This is how I think, no withholding. Taxes are all due towards the beginning of the year payed in full. The day after is voting and you bring your recept for taxes to the polling place which day is required for you to be able to vote.

Tax Day then Voting Day

And every politician's head is on the block every year.

Posted by: banana Dream at December 08, 2021 08:55 PM (a1pQd)


The problem with no withholding is few people have the smarts and discipline to save the necessary money out of each paycheck. And to not draw bigly from that money sometime before annual Fed/State Tax, Social Security tax, and MediCare tax payment day. Monthly mortgage escrow payments for property taxes addresses the same monthly savings set-aside problem It is easy for some to say so what, not my problem, but this is a real-life human behavior issue that has to be factored into the process.

Posted by: Gref at December 08, 2021 09:45 PM (AMIL/)

346 Best way to repurpose a glass jar? Pickled eggs.

Payback on a budget.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at December 08, 2021 09:45 PM (BPuaD)

347 Part of me just hates tossing perfectly good glass jars. There's gotta be some way to "re-purpose" (I hate that word) them

Open a cheap sperm bank.

Profit.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at December 08, 2021 09:45 PM (BFigT)

348 Good name for a drink would be....Pillow Talk
Posted by: Humphreyrobot

How Do You Like Me So Far?
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at December 08, 2021 09:42 PM (3l5Yq)

What Are You Thinking About???

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 08, 2021 09:45 PM (4I/2K)

349 If you want to store spring water, a little trick for you, is you put it in a clear plastic bottle and leave it out in the sun for a couple of hours. All that UV light is a natural disinfectant.

Posted by: Bear Grylls at December 08, 2021 09:46 PM (sGnvY)

350 Whatever containers you choose to store oxidane in, Ace Shelving, LLC can make sure they're stored with panache!

Posted by: Duncanthrax at December 08, 2021 09:46 PM (a3Q+t)

351 Best way to repurpose a glass jar? Pickled eggs.

Payback on a budget.
Posted by: Dr. Bone at December 08, 2021 09:45 PM (BPuaD)


Pickled onions > pickled eggs

Posted by: Doof at December 08, 2021 09:47 PM (mZUr4)

352 Big blow to Bill: De Blasio NYC vaxx mandate blocked by judge.

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at December 08, 2021 08:22 PM

Andrea Mitchell asked Fauci if officials should back off from mandating vaccines after a federal court imposed an injunction on Biden's vax mandate for federal contractors.

"I would prefer, and we all would prefer that people would be voluntarily getting vaccinated, but if they're not gonna do that, sometimes you've got to do things that are unpopular, but that clearly supersede individual choices for the communal good," said Fauci.


https://bit.ly/3pInf3o

Posted by: Clyde Shelton at December 08, 2021 09:47 PM (Do5/p)

353 as to water storage - I started thinking about it seriously this last winter when our cities water got turned off for 6 days thanks to the Great Freeze and a clusterfuck of errors by our municipal water system.

Posted by: Tom Servo at December 08, 2021 09:44 PM (evAgx)

It's easy to start with the 2L system if you drink soda. If not, I've used those 5 gallon blue containers and brewers carboys, which are both more expensive than the 2L route.

Posted by: flounder at December 08, 2021 09:48 PM (SH2Zi)

354 That Part There At The End Was Interesting. How Soon Can You Do That Again?

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 08, 2021 09:48 PM (4I/2K)

355 171...Much like Lucas should have cut Akira Kurosawa a share of the royalties from Star Wars, John William, pretty much swiped everything he put into his Star Wars, ET and Close Encounters suites and should throw Holsts family a couple of dollars.
Posted by: Thomas Bender at December 08, 2021 08:48 PM (z24xU)

Mostly stole from Mahler, but also Bruckner.

Posted by: Flyover at December 08, 2021 09:48 PM (Rbu5d)

356 -
DUBAI, United Arab Emirates (AP) Saudi authorities have conducted their biggest-ever crackdown on camel beauty contestants that received Botox injections and other artificial touch-ups, the state-run Saudi Press Agency reported Wednesday, with over 40 camels disqualified from the annual pageant. -
- ------

Sadly, many of the camels have been busted trying to artificially boost their original equipment up to "Whoopi Toe" levels.

Posted by: irright at December 08, 2021 09:49 PM (BB7pQ)

357 Part of me just hates tossing perfectly good glass jars. There's gotta be some way to "re-purpose" (I hate that word) them.
Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:30 PM (KAi1n)


You can can with them if you have lids that fit -- I have done so with acid fruit since if the seal breaks it will just ferment. I use the smaller mouth ones for dry fruit and dried vegetables. I use some small ones for cornmeal and whole wheat flour.

There was a company that made 58mm canning lids to fit the smaller mouthed jars but they don't make them anymore. Standard mason jars are 70mm

My wife scored about 200 babyfood jars that she gave to the kids program at the YMCA to do crafts

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 09:49 PM (ZMraq)

358 Posted by: Clyde Shelton at December 08, 2021 09:47 PM (Do5/p)[

Comrade, you know ve do zis only for your own good, da?

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:49 PM (hOUT3)

359 Squonk would be a great nic

Posted by: Doof at December 08, 2021 09:43 PM (mZUr4)

Greetings Sir or Madam,
Please note the names Squank, Squenk, Squink, Squonk, and Squunk are registered to the Vulcan Legal Aid Society. All use is prohibited without prior authorization. Contact your nearest Vulcan embassy for more information.

Posted by: Vulcan Legal Aid Society at December 08, 2021 09:52 PM (7bRMQ)

360 Did the hamsters die?

Posted by: irright at December 08, 2021 09:53 PM (BB7pQ)

361 Comrade, you know ve do zis only for your own good, da?

Posted by: Commissar Hrothgar (hOUT3) ~ Lie back and think of the sweet graft! ~ at December 08, 2021 09:49 PM

Da Da Da

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DM-v3cvX8M4

Posted by: Clyde Shelton at December 08, 2021 09:53 PM (Do5/p)

362 Storing pasta in the jars is an option.
Posted by: Just a side note

That is a great idea.

Posted by: Infidel at December 08, 2021 09:54 PM (qpolg)

363 Greetings Sir or Madam,
Please note the names Squank, Squenk, Squink, Squonk, and Squunk are registered to the Vulcan Legal Aid Society. All use is prohibited without prior authorization. Contact your nearest Vulcan embassy for more information.
Posted by: Vulcan Legal Aid Society at December 08, 2021 09:52 PM (7bRMQ)

Uh-oh!

Posted by: Squanto at December 08, 2021 09:54 PM (P3gRi)

364
The problem with no withholding is few people have the smarts and discipline to save the necessary money out of each paycheck.
Posted by: Gref at December 08, 2021 09:45 PM (AMIL/)


Yep, taxing authorities would wind up just garnishing back taxes (at 25%) and we would be back to what we have today.

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 09:54 PM (ZMraq)

365 25% of disposable income, that is.

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 09:56 PM (ZMraq)

366 the sewer replacement saga continues. Came home in the dark and couldn't get in the way I left. Had to back down to the intersection dodging heavy equip, parts and 10 yard piles of sand and gravel. Went back another way. Not sure I will be able to get out in the am. Might look better in the light.

Posted by: Infidel at December 08, 2021 09:57 PM (qpolg)

367 353 as to water storage - I started thinking about it seriously this last winter when our cities water got turned off for 6 days thanks to the Great Freeze and a clusterfuck of errors by our municipal water system.

Posted by: Tom Servo at December 08, 2021 09:44 PM (evAgx)

It's easy to start with the 2L system if you drink soda. If not, I've used those 5 gallon blue containers and brewers carboys, which are both more expensive than the 2L route.

Posted by: flounder at December 08, 2021 09:48 PM (SH2Zi)


DO NOT try to store water for a long time in the typical thin plastic gallon jugs used for milk and distilled water! That plastic breaks down after a time and the jug will leak. The break-down is quicker if the jug is stored in a garage in hot climates. Don't ask me how I know.

Posted by: Gref at December 08, 2021 09:57 PM (AMIL/)

368 Happy doggie in the top pic.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at December 08, 2021 09:59 PM (VwHCD)

369 So I think the people in inner cities need a Trunk Monkey, especially the Theft Retrieval System version (1:40 mark).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rx6WB5YJia8

Posted by: Clyde Shelton at December 08, 2021 10:00 PM (Do5/p)

370 ONT is up!

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 08, 2021 10:00 PM (4I/2K)

371 303 Do yourself a favor and get 2 Liter soda bottles if you can, they are pretty stable and they make crates to stack them in

Posted by: Kindltot at December 08, 2021 09:22 PM (ZMraq)

This. Clean and dry well. Fill and add a few drops of bleach. Storing anything in glass jars in bulk on top of a fault line seems like a recipe for disappointment and a huge mess.

Posted by: flounder at December 08, 2021 09:26 PM (SH2Zi)

If you're an apartment/urban dweller and want to save some space, buy Pool Shock (calcium hypoclorite) instead of bleach. Mix the pool shock 1 tsp to 1 gallon of water to make bleach, then use 1 part of that solution to 100 parts of water for purification. Easier to keep a jar of pool shock on hand than 50 gallons of bleach, and it's more shelf-stable, too.

Posted by: Pennsyltucky at December 08, 2021 10:02 PM (lNHqD)

372 Greetings Sir or Madam,
Please note the names Squank, Squenk, Squink, Squonk, and Squunk are registered to the Vulcan Legal Aid Society. All use is prohibited without prior authorization. Contact your nearest Vulcan embassy for more information.
Posted by: Vulcan Legal Aid Society at December 08, 2021 09:52 PM


What about Snizz?

Asking on behalf of Capt. Kirk.

Posted by: Yeoman Rand at December 08, 2021 10:02 PM (a3Q+t)

373 279 The glass jars themselves get clean easily.)
Posted by: SFGoth at December 08, 2021 09:13 PM (KAi1n)

you can try soaking them in H2O2, or white vinegar, or a somewhat weak bleach solution.

Posted by: Flyover at December 08, 2021 10:03 PM (Rbu5d)

374 Your papers, please!

Breaking911
@Breaking911
DR. FAUCI: "You can enjoy, as we have traditionally over the years, dinners and gatherings within the home with people who are vaccinated...People should, if they invite people over their home, essentially ask and maybe require that people show evidence that they are vaccinated."

-
Old and busted: Ho ho ho!

New and shiny: Jab jab jab!

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks Now With Pumpkin Spice! at December 08, 2021 10:03 PM (FVME7)

375 341 I use old glass jars to store my urine. Each one is meticulously labeled with a date/time stamp and testing notes. Reduces water usage cause I don't have flush unless it's brown.
Posted by: Piss Collector at December 08, 2021 09:42 PM (QU5/

I watched "15 Things you Didn't Know about Bigfoot"(Number 1 will blow your mind!" last night.
amazingly, your character was in that movie.

Posted by: Tom Servo at December 08, 2021 10:04 PM (evAgx)

376 Store water for things other than drinking in the bathtub before the hurricane (folks in eathquake land, can't help you with that one). The toilets will still flush.

Boil drinking water on the propane BBQ. Keep an extra propane bottle handy. Keep charcoal just in case you need to go old school.

Posted by: Caesar North of the Rubicon at December 08, 2021 10:13 PM (BMmaB)

377 It also depends on why you're storing the water. If SHTF in San Francisco, it's probably a better investment to have firearms. Then you have all the water you need.

Posted by: Caesar North of the Rubicon at December 08, 2021 10:17 PM (BMmaB)

378 369
I especially like the body disposal feature.

Posted by: Dr. Claw at December 08, 2021 10:31 PM (roH4R)

379 Am from United States. I was diagnosed with Herpes early this year in 2021 and the doctor told me herpes has no cure. I kept searching for any possible cure. While searching, I came across lots of reviews on facebook about how doctor DOUGRAY used herbal medicine to cure different people from Herpes and other diseases. I made an order for the herpes cure eraser and I received it 5 days later, I took the medicine for 9 days as instructed. While taking the medicine, I noticed some changes in my body. I used the medicine during the outbreak and the outbreak stopped completely. all the itching and pain was gone completely. When I was done taking the herbal medicine, I went for a test and I was confirmed Herpes negative "totally cured". Before I made an order for herbal medicine, I promised Dr DOUGRAY that if his product actually worked for me I was going to share the testimony through all social media so lots of people can be aware that Herpes is curable. you can contact dr dougray via Email: drdougray@gmail.com

Posted by: linda stefan at December 09, 2021 06:31 AM (bPpS0)

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