First-World Problems...

cloggedgutter.jpg

Except that wasn't the problem!

We had a startling quantity of rain a few weeks ago as the remnants of Hurricane Ida dropped what seemed like most of the Mississippi in a very short amount of time. Nothing like the Gulf Coast or other parts of the country, but the Northeast simply doesn't see that much rain...ever.

But we got almost 10 inches of rain in about 12 hours, and that is just too much water for most houses. At one point all three of my sump pumps were running, and at 60 gallons/minute/pump that is a lot of water!

But the only real issue was the inability of the gutters to carry away all of that water, so some of it spilled down the house and into the soil around the foundation. I noticed the water spilling over the gutters and my first thought was that they were clogged, but no, they simply could not handle the volume.

And the solution? Nope...there isn't one. I guess I could replace them with wider and deeper gutters, but that doesn't add a significant amount of capacity and may just transfer the rate limiting step to the seepage pits.

Well...the solution is to have an excellent Manhattan (stirred, not shaken) made with good red vermouth and maple syrup, and not worry about it until the next time we get that much rain. Which may not be for 20 or 30 years!

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM




Comments

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1 Gutter talk.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at September 26, 2021 01:01 PM (vuisn)

2 It's gutter time, gutter time, gut-gut-gutter time!

Posted by: exdem13 at September 26, 2021 01:02 PM (W+kMI)

3 Except for people who live in a double-wide.

Posted by: exdem13 at September 26, 2021 01:02 PM (W+kMI)

4 >>>I noticed the water spilling over the gutters and my first thought was that they were clogged, but no, they simply could not handle the volume.

======

Had that problem. And sump couldn't keep up. Hoping new gutters in the spring will help. Current ones are pretty old.

Posted by: Now they tell me at September 26, 2021 01:03 PM (8TpiG)

5 Fun fact: "Gargoyle" and "gargle" have the same etymology ("throat"), as gargoyles were used as gutters on old buildings.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at September 26, 2021 01:03 PM (vuisn)

6 A very soft, quiet early Fall day full of sunshine here, perfect for contemplation of whatever 1st world problem one has.

Posted by: irongrampa at September 26, 2021 01:05 PM (KATBx)

7 First world problem today. Out of spicy cherries for my old fashions.

Posted by: Now they tell me at September 26, 2021 01:06 PM (8TpiG)

8 For ponds and terraces with drain tile, the contingency plan is ... accept the once in four year overflow. idk about houses on certain sites that have flooding problems .. depends how vital it is to keep the basement dry I guess.

My old farm house had settled, had a big crack in one basement wall. In one big rain, there was a gusher of water coming through that crack, but the whole basement has a perimeter drain and about a 1" open border around the edge that seems to suck up a lot of water pretty quickly ... so it all drained out (plus one floor drain helped). I built a large covered veranda on that side of the house, but just some grading and filling would have fixed the issue.

Posted by: illiniwek at September 26, 2021 01:08 PM (Cus5s)

9
Except for people who live in a double-wide.
Posted by: exdem13


That's the solution - double-wide gutters!

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at September 26, 2021 01:08 PM (63Dwl)

10 I got so much done Friday and Saturday that I thought today was Monday. I found an extra day in the week.

Posted by: vivi at September 26, 2021 01:09 PM (USW1s)

11 If it isn't raining the roof doesn't leak.
If it is, you can't fix it anyway.
Booze is the answer.
Having lived in Florida being out here in desert country is a joy. My home doesn't even have gutters.
Icicles and snow build up can be an issue though.

Posted by: Winston, GOPe, not one dime, not one vote at September 26, 2021 01:09 PM (FtJ1S)

12 Fun fact: "Gargoyle" and "gargle" have the same etymology ("throat"), as gargoyles were used as gutters on old buildings.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at September 26, 2021 01:03 PM (vuisn)

Hmmm...that makes sense, because gorge is throat in French.

And even if it isn't true, I like it!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 01:09 PM (Q9lwr)

13 "water spilling over the gutters and my first thought was that they were clogged, but no, they simply could not handle the volume."

the gutters can handle it, if they had more frequent downspouts. ...

Posted by: illiniwek at September 26, 2021 01:11 PM (Cus5s)

14 CBD
Have you thought about rain barrels under the downspouts? Store it up for dry months?

Posted by: Winston, GOPe, not one dime, not one vote at September 26, 2021 01:12 PM (FtJ1S)

15 "Which may not be for 20 or 30 years!"

That was kind of our conclusion after the Big Freeze here in Texas last February. (We were without power for 30 hours when the temp was between 0 and 3 for 4 days. But we still had water, propane, a fireplace, and a s-ton of blankets and comforters.) Last time it was that cold was the day we moved into our old house in December 1989. The only thing we afterwards was to buy a small propane heater, which has multiple uses.

Posted by: Art Rondelet of Malmsey at September 26, 2021 01:12 PM (fTtFy)

16 the solution is ...
and not worry about it until the next time we get that much rain. Which may not be for 20 or 30 years!


Watch out for your county agents and federal politicians. It's an excellent opportunity to re-regulate your property and life.

-OMG, we can't let this happen again
- it's catastrophic
- we must change the 50, 100, 1,000 year flood plan
- flood insurance is the answer and a new county drainage plan.

VOTE FOR ME

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 01:13 PM (1EKMc)

17 Been napping

Posted by: Skip at September 26, 2021 01:13 PM (2JoB8)

18 hiya

Posted by: JT at September 26, 2021 01:14 PM (arJlL)

19 In the house I grew up in, we had some rain gutters. My mom had a yuge pot that she used to collect rain water.

A neighbor who just put it a pool is giving me a lot of dirt. Not topsoil, unfortunately. But I plan to build a raised planter. I will buy a load of mulch and other stuff, use cinder (concrete) blocks to contain it. I plan to cut my existing downspouts so that I can fit big buckets underneath.

Wish me luck.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 01:14 PM (xopIz)

20 Store it up for dry months?

Posted by: Winston, GOPe, not one dime, not one vote at September 26, 2021 01:12 PM (FtJ1S)

We don't have those!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 01:14 PM (Q9lwr)

21 the gutters can handle it, if they had more frequent downspouts. ...

Posted by: illiniwek at September 26, 2021 01:11 PM (Cus5s)

That is an interesting idea!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 01:15 PM (Q9lwr)

22 The city water that I expect to use to water the vegetable garden has chlorine. Rain water is best.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 01:18 PM (xopIz)

23 Did you notice that the pros never repair their divots?

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 01:18 PM (xopIz)

24 I have a few big trees very near house, but also have a 4/12 pitch so I can walk on it use leaf blower and clean them in 5 minutes

Posted by: Skip at September 26, 2021 01:19 PM (2JoB8)

25 I went shopping recently and grabbed a container of salsa because I was running low. Later, I popped the lid, took a scoop and nearly gagged up my breakfast. I missed the part on the label where it said "Mango-Peach Salsa."

Posted by: Dr. Bone at September 26, 2021 01:19 PM (stUc+)

26 20 CBD
That's unfortunate.
CO, WA and OR have all attempted to forbid rain barrels claiming that water falling from the sky is state property.
Water rights are a huge issue out west and the laws and rules are incredibly dense and Byzantine. IIRC there was an attorney in Denver who spent a 30 year career on one case about water rights. It remains unresolved.

Posted by: Winston, GOPe, not one dime, not one vote at September 26, 2021 01:19 PM (FtJ1S)

27 Engineers don't like this concept but
stand outside while it's raining and see where the water is coming from (a lot of water came from my neighbor) and where it wants to travel/go.

Terrace your yard in accordance with what the water wants to do. Path of least resistance. Not swimming upstream. Whistling in the wind so to speak.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 01:19 PM (1EKMc)

28
I noticed the water spilling over the gutters and my first thought was that they were clogged, but no, they simply could not handle the volume.

Do you have the leaf proof gutters? Because they may do a good job at keeping leaves out, but they can't be very effective in a deluge.

What people in my area do is open the ends of the gutters. In the usual rain, the water departs down the downspout in the usual fashion. In a deluge the high volume of water and any leaves and crap shoot out the end at warp speed.

Posted by: Traitor Joe's Military Surplus, Vaccine and Massage Parlor at September 26, 2021 01:22 PM (dQvv7)

29 I'm not remembering why your house needs so much sump pump power. Does the downspout normally drain to the street, without pumping? ... And how does so much water get into the basement?

You could add Big Rain Contigency downspouts, which are noramlly closed off for aesthetics, opened for the rare big rains, where the extra downspout is readily attached.

Posted by: illiniwek at September 26, 2021 01:23 PM (Cus5s)

30 Just got wider deeper gutters put on the house. Work good for the heavy storms, my neighbors gutters where overflowing like crazy last heavy rain and mine not. We have not had a really big rain since Floyd, 24-inches in 24 hours, my home at the time did not flood but it got close, others not so lucky..

Posted by: Fred at September 26, 2021 01:24 PM (wgxgK)

31 High efficiency gutters!

Posted by: runner at September 26, 2021 01:24 PM (UiGQV)

32 All of our runoff goes into Baisley Pond which drains into Jamaica Bay. Southeast Queens is all marshland up to the county line with Nassau.

Posted by: Jamaica Queens at September 26, 2021 01:26 PM (b+v9B)

33 26 20 CBD
That's unfortunate.
CO, WA and OR have all attempted to forbid rain barrels claiming that water falling from the sky is state property.
...
Posted by: Winston, GOPe
-------------

- > Does Federalism rain dance for PNWers

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 01:27 PM (1EKMc)

34 First world problem: grocery stores, because of everything, are staffed with morons.

Posted by: runner at September 26, 2021 01:28 PM (UiGQV)

35 I have 6" gutters on my outbuilding with back side emptied into a rain barrel.

Posted by: Skip at September 26, 2021 01:28 PM (2JoB8)

36 That's unfortunate.
CO, WA and OR have all attempted to forbid rain barrels claiming that water falling from the sky is state property.
...
Posted by: Winston, GOPe


If you drive a car, I'll tax the street
If you try to sit, I'll tax your seat
If you get too cold I'll tax the heat
If you take a walk, I'll tax your feet

Posted by: Napoleon XIV at September 26, 2021 01:29 PM (AiZBA)

37 Lower the ground level around the house and terrace runoffs away

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 01:30 PM (1EKMc)

38 *peeks in*

*sees boring talk of gutters*

*wanders off*

Posted by: SMH - The War has been won, only the battles remain, as usual at September 26, 2021 01:32 PM (PZBsS)

39 Yep, water is a BFD in CO. One of the attys I work for does water law. It's fascinating and very complicated.

Posted by: Infidel at September 26, 2021 01:32 PM (Kx3kq)

40 We could talk about chainsaws if you like.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 01:33 PM (1EKMc)

41 I try and clean the rain gutters each season. Between the leaves and the raccoons shitting on the roof, it's not just a job, it's an adventure.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at September 26, 2021 01:34 PM (R/m4+)

42 39 Yep, water is a BFD in CO.
----------

Read something from Front Range -
They fight over ditches.
Ditch right wars.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 01:34 PM (1EKMc)

43 Duct tape? Surely duct tape can help.

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 01:35 PM (6dJKT)

44 5 Fun fact: "Gargoyle" and "gargle" have the same etymology ("throat"), as gargoyles were used as gutters on old buildings.
Posted by: Dr. Varno at September 26, 2021 01:03 PM (vuisn)

That is a very fun fact.

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 01:37 PM (6dJKT)

45 If I know a heavy rain is coming its before every rain I need to clean gutters

Posted by: Skip at September 26, 2021 01:37 PM (2JoB8)

46 Two funny videos -- a French one [8 seconds] and an Aussie one [16 seconds] re. Covid police.

https://twitter.com/Keg767/status/
1442065200262250500

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 26, 2021 01:38 PM (UHVv4)

47 39 Yep, water is a BFD in CO. One of the attys I work for does water law. It's fascinating and very complicated.

Posted by: Infidel at September 26, 2021 01:32 PM (Kx3kq)


How long ago was it that the experts predicted the US was going to run out of fresh water in a few years? 1990's? 2000's?

Posted by: CNN at September 26, 2021 01:39 PM (AMIL/)

48 I went into a local mom-and-pop that has baked goods, today, and they have these kind of dry brown cookies; some sort of chocolate-like flavor, but no sugar. They had some I hadn't seen before, that are black. Whoa. So I bought those. They're black because they are burnt. I just.

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 01:39 PM (6dJKT)

49
I know it's time to clean my gutters when a small tree sprouts in them. I'm just that meticulous - hold your praise.

Posted by: Traitor Joe's Military Surplus, Vaccine and Massage Parlor at September 26, 2021 01:40 PM (dQvv7)

50 The rain falls on the just and the unjust.

Posted by: Eromero at September 26, 2021 01:41 PM (0OP+5)

51 Read something from Front Range -
They fight over ditches.
Ditch right wars.
Posted by: Braenyard

Yes, and those idiots have nowhere enough storage for when there is a big rain or snow. We on the other side of the divide are continually fighting to keep the east side from taking our water.

Posted by: Infidel at September 26, 2021 01:41 PM (Kx3kq)

52 I am thinking "duct tape garbage bags to the side of the house," CBD. Would look great, that's for sure.

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 01:41 PM (6dJKT)

53
Try getting some downspout extenders to carry the water from the gutters farther away from the house. We had regular basement flooding in our 150-year-old house in Ohio until we extended the drainage. The problem just about ended after that.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 26, 2021 01:42 PM (/U27+)

54 I'm not remembering why your house needs so much sump pump power. Does the downspout normally drain to the street, without pumping? ... And how does so much water get into the basement?

Posted by: illiniwek at September 26, 2021 01:23 PM (Cus5s)

Much of the downhill portion of the house is built on red rock, which obviously doesn't soak up any water.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 01:43 PM (Q9lwr)

55 >>>Did you notice that the pros never repair their divots?

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 01:18 PM (xopIz)

======

At Whistling Straits you are not supposed to replace the divots. Something about the type of grass. I forget exactly.

Posted by: Now they tell me at September 26, 2021 01:44 PM (8TpiG)

56 I do not know much about gutters, other then the night thread, however, if is just a rain thing then my understanding is that you are supposed to shove a bunch of marbls in Audrey Hepburn's mouth.

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:45 PM (K3ZCc)

57 why your house needs so much sump pump power. Does the downspout normally drain to the street, without pumping? ... And how does so much water get into the basement?


because he does not want a basement full of fucking sump, why is this hard?

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:46 PM (K3ZCc)

58 Rain, Spain, mainly, plain.

Posted by: Eromero at September 26, 2021 01:47 PM (0OP+5)

59 thanks

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:47 PM (K3ZCc)

60 CNN, I think late 90's.

Posted by: Infidel at September 26, 2021 01:47 PM (Kx3kq)

61 If I know a heavy rain is coming its before every rain I need to clean gutters

Posted by: Skip at September 26, 2021 01:37 PM


An extremely heavy rain usually cleaned out my gutters when we lived in Connecticut. And when it didn't, I paid the guy $2,500 to get the leaf guard seamless gutters installed. Best investment I ever made on that house.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 01:48 PM (JUOKG)

62 Try getting some downspout extenders to carry the water from the gutters farther away from the house.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 26, 2021 01:42 PM (/U27+)

That's in the works for the one gutter that contributes, but the rest of them run into a 1,000 gallon seepage pit mandated by the fvcking retard village engineer.

My architect's argument that the pit was, out of necessity, going to be dug into impermeable rock and would do nothing but immediately overflow fell on his shit-clogged deaf ears.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM (Q9lwr)

63 Did you notice that the pros never repair their divots?

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 01:18 PM (xopIz)

that is a secret of the pros as Shooter Mcgavin would say. A divot is when they take a swing and leave a spot in the turf. A ball mark is something else and for sure they repair them. They may not personally do it, but their caddies do it. Most of the time they do it on the greens.

The thing often not mentioned in these events you have hundreds spending day and night fixing up the course to exact specifications.

Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM (kmK04)

64 Afternoon.

Here's a stupid question cuz I'm a stupid asshole.

When you're talking about maple syrup in a Manhattan, I'm assuming you're not talking about Aunt Jemima. What kinds/brands of maple syrup should I look for that goes with demon alcohol?

Posted by: Robert - Tremonti *Marching In Time* Out NOW!!! at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM (1Yy3c)

65 andycanuck that was to ragged a formation for that, still funny

Posted by: Skip at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM (2JoB8)

66 As usual, the Horde has its collective mind in the gutter.

We had our gutters replaced last year and upgraded to larger ones. We really appreciated it this year with all the rain. Our Nazi HOA does not allow rain barrels.

Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM (OQcPl)

67 If I know a heavy rain is coming its before every rain I need to clean gutters

Posted by: S


I believe the phrase you wanted was drain the pipes, no?

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:50 PM (K3ZCc)

68 Rain predicted here in ETEX Wed/Thur/Fri, when I planned to take off a couple days. That's ok, we need some rain. I plan to put corn in deerfeeder tomorrow, maybe we'll see a tasty pig.

Posted by: Eromero at September 26, 2021 01:50 PM (0OP+5)

69 The irony about the rain in Spain is it almost never falls on the plain. It is a clever line, but could not be further from the truth.

Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 01:51 PM (kmK04)

70 What kinds/brands of maple syrup should I look for that goes with demon alcohol?

Posted by: Robert - Tremonti *Marching In Time* Out NOW!!! at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM (1Yy3c)

I used to use generic maple syrup (Canada, New York, etc) and sometimes the good stuff from Vermont. They were all good. But I have recently begun using excellent Wisconsin maple syrup, courtesy of commenter Muad'dib.

I think the cheap pancake syrups are a bit too sweet...cloyingly so.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 01:53 PM (Q9lwr)

71 Aunt Jemima has a new name.

Something something something.

And a black family in the ad.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 01:53 PM (xopIz)

72
When you're talking about maple syrup in a Manhattan, I'm assuming you're not talking about Aunt Jemima

___________

That bitch Mrs. Butterworth

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 26, 2021 01:53 PM (/U27+)

73 gutter protectors may help. But they sure as shit are ten times harder to clean. My suggestion is to get the best you can afford. Low rent gutter protectors, offered by charlatans who prey on people, are the worst possible option. Then you have very little protection and also a Hell of a time cleaning them out.

Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 01:54 PM (kmK04)

74 For the average mind it might seem counterintuitive, however, maybe you should have water running through your gutters 24/7/365 so nothing ever has a chance to mess up your gutters, it is just instantly washed away.

just 5 to 10 gallons a min

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:54 PM (K3ZCc)

75 My architect's argument that the pit was, out of necessity,

Terrace after dark
hide it with a shrubbery
no one will notice

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 01:55 PM (1EKMc)

76 I was thinking of buying the gutter screens at Lowes.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 01:55 PM (xopIz)

77 The solution is to extend your eaves about two feet beyond the exterior wall (or more, if you have low sun angle in the winter) and leave the damned gutters off. Put in a gravel drip strip and let it naturally drain away from the house. Gutters don't work when: it's frozen, they are full of leaves, they are full of critters, they are overwhelmed, etc. etc. etc.

Gutters were designed to need cleaning, replacing, and cursing on a regular basis. They are simply not needed if your architect was worth a damn.

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at September 26, 2021 01:56 PM (SDdx5)

78 if you wanna see a cnundrum have somebody give cbd the perfect manhattan, served by the hottest batender with a french toast garnish.

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:56 PM (K3ZCc)

79 In the Adirondacks gutter guards are mandatory, there's so much junk that will clog the runs, acorns and maple spinners being the worst. I do a cleaning every 3 years.

Posted by: irongrampa at September 26, 2021 01:56 PM (KATBx)

80 have you tried shooting the gutters?

how about the rain?

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:57 PM (K3ZCc)

81 :;()$&@!!!

Some gutter talk.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 26, 2021 01:57 PM (axyOa)

82 I meant Costco.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 01:57 PM (xopIz)

83 Fruit Loops... syrup..... cotton candy combined is as powerful as C4.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 26, 2021 01:57 PM (T1fV4)

84 I be wants two bring two yoor attenterion that's there our fake FART tubes fond in the Brattleboro area. Officials FART tubes has the Brattleboro Citi seel on then and anyone ones turingg in a fake tube will bea find $1000 and changed with a fellowny .

Posted by: Mary Cloginstien from Brattleboro, VT at September 26, 2021 01:57 PM (6QJnV)

85 just 5 to 10 gallons a min

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:54 PM (K3ZCc)

Here comes math!

5 gallons x sixty minutes x 24 hours x 8 months =
1,728,000 gallons of water.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 01:57 PM (Q9lwr)

86
That's in the works for the one gutter that contributes, but the rest of them run into a 1,000 gallon seepage pit mandated by the fvcking retard village engineer.

_________

1000 gallons is a thimblefull compared to how much comes down. After a bad storm I have two 1/3 hp pumps (40 gpm each) in low spots in the back and it takes three days to get it all out.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 26, 2021 01:57 PM (/U27+)

87 in fairness, I have to say this is making me doubt thee Jews run the weather thing.

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:57 PM (K3ZCc)

88 CBD, try Pure Maple Cream from Chandler's Sugar Shack in Topsfield Maine.That stuff is pure evil murder in Wild Turkey 101.

Posted by: Eromero at September 26, 2021 01:58 PM (0OP+5)

89
I used to use generic maple syrup (Canada, New York, etc) and sometimes the good stuff from Vermont. They were all good. But I have recently begun using excellent Wisconsin maple syrup, courtesy of commenter Muad'dib.

I think the cheap pancake syrups are a bit too sweet...cloyingly so.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 01:53 PM (Q9lwr)

So maybe something like this?

https://tinyurl.com/Demonalciholsyrup

Posted by: Robert - Tremonti *Marching In Time* Out NOW!!! at September 26, 2021 01:58 PM (1Yy3c)

90 46 Two funny videos -- a French one [8 seconds] and an Aussie one [16 seconds] re. Covid police.

https://twitter.com/Keg767/status/
1442065200262250500
Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 26, 2021 01:38 PM (UHVv4)

Yay!

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 01:58 PM (6dJKT)

91 What is a FART Tube ???

Posted by: James at September 26, 2021 01:58 PM (24+Vp)

92 :;()$&@!!!

Some gutter talk.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 26, 2021 01:57 PM (axyOa)

your mind is in the gutter.

Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 01:58 PM (kmK04)

93 Had to have old gutters replaced last spring. they were 46 yo. New one work amazingly well.

Posted by: Infidel at September 26, 2021 01:58 PM (Kx3kq)

94
The rain was so intense in my neck of the woods that a couple of retaining basins in a new subdivision were destroyed. For about 10 days now crews have been working daily on excavating deeper and bringing in fresh rock to line the bottom.

This in a town which is notoriously tough on storm water control. It still wasn't enough. After those retaining basins overflowed it hit the street and covered it with three feet of water, making it impassable.

Posted by: Traitor Joe's Military Surplus, Vaccine and Massage Parlor at September 26, 2021 01:58 PM (dQvv7)

95 5 gallons x sixty minutes x 24 hours x 8 months =
1,728,000 gallons of water.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo


do you get a discount if you do 12 months?

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:59 PM (K3ZCc)

96 Rain predicted here in ETEX Wed/Thur/Fri, when I planned to take off a couple days. That's ok, we need some rain. I plan to put corn in deerfeeder tomorrow, maybe we'll see a tasty pig.
Posted by: Eromero


Hoping to have the foundation poured Monday. They strung the rebar Saturday. Plumbers were there last Wednesday thru Friday.

In-laws are having a new metal roof installed due to hail damage.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 01:59 PM (OCTRt)

97 I was on a bowling team. Thinking about a name for the team, I thought "Gutter sluts." from the time J.R. Ewing used the term.

We were the Gutter Rats.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 01:59 PM (xopIz)

98 My wife leaves the house and I grab the ladder. I can get a lot done on the roof and with the gutters when she is not around to yell at me.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at September 26, 2021 02:00 PM (flINI)

99 I spent yesterday and this morning cleaning debris off moms roof and gutters. Then picking it up and placing on the burn pile. Labor of love.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 26, 2021 02:00 PM (jvt6t)

100 in fairness, I have to say this is making me doubt thee Jews run the weather thing.
Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:57 PM (K3ZCc)

*Whistling coyly*

Posted by: The Magyars at September 26, 2021 02:00 PM (1Yy3c)

101 So maybe something like this?

https://tinyurl.com/Demonalciholsyrup

Posted by: Robert - Tremonti *Marching In Time* Out NOW!!! at September 26, 2021 01:58 PM (1Yy3c)

it can't hurt, although I wonder how much of that bourbon flavor is going to survive the vermouth and the...um...bourbon!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 02:01 PM (Q9lwr)

102 My wife leaves the house and I grab the ladder. I can get a lot done on the roof and with the gutters when she is not around to yell at me.
Posted by: Truck


out at the ranch, our neighbor bought it that way.

he waited until nobody was around, got the ladder, went over sideways, they found him frozen.

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:01 PM (K3ZCc)

103 66 Our Nazi HOA does not allow rain barrels.
Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM (OQcPl)

Their reason being?

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 02:02 PM (6dJKT)

104 When they are in season, hunting gutter snipes can be fun. They have a separate bow season too.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 26, 2021 02:02 PM (axyOa)

105 I spent yesterday and this morning cleaning debris off moms roof and gutters. Then picking it up and placing on the burn pile. Labor of love.
Posted by: Jak


does everything have to be about sex here?

ffs

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:02 PM (K3ZCc)

106 That's in the works for the one gutter that contributes, but the rest of them run into a 1,000 gallon seepage pit mandated by the fvcking retard village engineer.

My architect's argument that the pit was, out of necessity, going to be dug into impermeable rock and would do nothing but immediately overflow fell on his shit-clogged deaf ears.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM


That's Federal rules. I ran into the same thing on my house in Kentucky. 6-8 inches of standing water in the backyard after a heavy rain and it would be there for days because it had no place to drain to. Had a guy come out to do drainage work and it was a disaster. We had to have 4 500 gallon holding tanks in the backyard with a single overflow that ran to the front yard. He said if he moved water from our yard to the street he could be fined big time.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:03 PM (JUOKG)

107 do you get a discount if you do 12 months?

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 01:59 PM (K3ZCc)

I'm not sure I want to run water through my gutters in the winter!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 02:03 PM (Q9lwr)

108 Age X...ladder width A....ladder height/ roof...B...death/crippled...D

Okay...who can math?

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 26, 2021 02:04 PM (T1fV4)

109 was at the store this afternoon, there was a mother in front of me describing to her daughter how to use the maxipads and tampns they were buying, that was nice.

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:04 PM (K3ZCc)

110 Our Nazi HOA does not allow rain barrels.
Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM (OQcPl)

Do they inspect your back yard?

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at September 26, 2021 02:05 PM (SDdx5)

111 he waited until nobody was around, got the ladder, went over sideways, they found him frozen.

Never work above an open freezer.

Posted by: Blanco Basura - moronhorde.com. Not insurgents, counterrevolutionaries. at September 26, 2021 02:05 PM (SchxB)

112 I quit getting on the roof about 8 yrs ago. Kidlet insisted. Wasn't too bad at the last place, here would be more dangerous. And the part about falling off. I live alone.

Posted by: Infidel at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (Kx3kq)

113 Our Nazi HOA does not allow rain barrels.
Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM (OQcPl)

Do they inspect your back yard?

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at September 26, 2021 02:05 PM


The HOA that was 4 houses down from me in Kentucky had a guy that had a step stool and binoculars that went around checking for stuff.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (JUOKG)

114 Lotsa ads (Northern Illinois) for leaf guards for rain gutters. One truly amusing ad had a Biden clone as the ignoramus falling off a ladder and bemoaning not buying that system.

Don't know why I am obsessed with ads right now.

Posted by: mustbequantum at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (MIKMs)

115 49 I know it's time to clean my gutters when a small tree sprouts in them. I'm just that meticulous - hold your praise.
Posted by: Traitor Joe's Military Surplus, Vaccine and Massage Parlor at September 26, 2021 01:40 PM (dQvv7)

Happy little small tree sprouts?

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (6dJKT)

116 109 was at the store this afternoon, there was a mother in front of me describing to her daughter how to use the maxipads and tampns they were buying, that was nice.
Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:04 PM (K3ZCc)

You would prefer she not tell her daughter how it's done? and tell me again why you were in that aisle listening to strangers?

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (SDdx5)

117 My wife leaves the house and I grab the ladder. I can get a lot done on the roof and with the gutters when she is not around to yell at me.
Posted by: Truck


out at the ranch, our neighbor bought it that way.

he waited until nobody was around, got the ladder, went over sideways, they found him frozen.
Posted by: confederatefifth


I'm not allowed to do stuff like that if the wife isn't home. For that reason. I have to do some work on the riding lawnmower and since I almost cut off my thumb working on it July 2020, I can't until she's home.

Just so she can drive my to the ER if necessary.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (OCTRt)

118 Age X...ladder width A....ladder height/ roof...B...death/crippled...D

Okay...who can math?
Posted by: H


70S
8FT
have you ever heard of somebody being unfrozen?

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:07 PM (K3ZCc)

119 Half of our gutters were knocked down by snow & ice a few years ago. Haven't bothered to replace. No basement here and drainage is good.

*knocks on wood*

Posted by: JQ, a hick in the sticks at September 26, 2021 02:07 PM (dB4Iz)

120 Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:04 PM (K3ZCc)

What the hell is wrong with people. smh.

Posted by: Infidel at September 26, 2021 02:07 PM (Kx3kq)

121 The HOA that was 4 houses down from me in Kentucky had a guy that had a step stool and binoculars that went around checking for stuff.
Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (JUOKG)

Around here that fellow would have met an... unhappy accident.

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at September 26, 2021 02:07 PM (SDdx5)

122
The HOA that was 4 houses down from me in Kentucky had a guy that had a step stool and binoculars that went around checking for stuff.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (JUOKG)

That guy needs some serious locker room diplomacy.

Posted by: Deplorable Ian Galt at September 26, 2021 02:08 PM (ufFY8)

123 when you install your gutter screens, don't trim them to fit your gutter

use the excess to build in an upward arch, then the leaves collect in the crease between the roof edge and gutter

if you cut them to size, the leaves just cover the gutter screen and the rain will run right over them. And then, even worse, the weight of the leaves will collaprse the screen and block the gutter

allows the rain to flow thru and makes the clean out easier and prevents the dreaded screen collapse

and when did Americans get so fucking scared of ladders ?

Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:08 PM (us2H3)

124 The HOA that was 4 houses down from me in Kentucky had a guy that had a step stool and binoculars that went around checking for stuff.
Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (JUOKG)

Yeah I hate it when a sex offender is relocated into the 'hood.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 26, 2021 02:08 PM (axyOa)

125 Just so she can drive my to the ER if necessary.
Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (OCTRt)

As my dad used to say, "Do you know the number for 911?"

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at September 26, 2021 02:08 PM (SDdx5)

126 Bought my house in 86. Got 17 inches of water in the basement when sewers backed up. Came up over the pilot light on my dryer and the shutoffs didn't work so natural gas bubbled up through the water all day. Came home from work and gas rushed out of the house when I opened the door. That's when I first realized your house is always trying to kill you.

Posted by: dartist at September 26, 2021 02:09 PM (+ya+t)

127 Had a guy come out to do drainage work and it was a disaster.

That's what happens when people one doesn't know become involved. Just get a shovel and do some landscaping in the middle of the rain.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 02:09 PM (1EKMc)

128 The HOA that was 4 houses down from me in Kentucky had a guy that had a step stool and binoculars that went around checking for stuff.

Could've called police to report a "peeping Tom" lol.

Posted by: JQ, a hick in the sticks at September 26, 2021 02:09 PM (dB4Iz)

129 102 My wife leaves the house and I grab the ladder. I can get a lot done on the roof and with the gutters when she is not around to yell at me.
Posted by: Truck

out at the ranch, our neighbor bought it that way.

he waited until nobody was around, got the ladder, went over sideways, they found him frozen.
Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:01 PM (K3ZCc)

I was gonna say: I know somebody who got a teaching position that opened up right before classes started, in exactly that same circumstance.

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 02:09 PM (6dJKT)

130 The best solution is to remove the gutters - except those ones right over exit and entry doorways. If there are no gutters, then they can't (a) clog or (b) overflow, yes?

Posted by: Dr_No at September 26, 2021 02:10 PM (mu5GU)

131 Mom is in her 90's and still complains about me confiscating her ladders and the pull string for the attic access on her 80th birthday.

Posted by: Too Bad Costa Rica Sucks at September 26, 2021 02:10 PM (QZ/dC)

132 113 Our Nazi HOA does not allow rain barrels.
Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM (OQcPl)

Do they inspect your back yard?

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at September 26, 2021 02:05 PM


The HOA that was 4 houses down from me in Kentucky had a guy that had a step stool and binoculars that went around checking for stuff.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM
We live in a HOA and there's 3 vehicles, 2 riding mowers, nine 5 gal gas cans, a pallet of bottle water, and a job box under our carport. We are the last house before the lake.

Posted by: Eromero at September 26, 2021 02:10 PM (0OP+5)

133 If you don't like your HOA, vote in new leadership. Or sell - it was likely there when you bought. Oh, but you'll love your HOA when one of your neighbors decides to do something that pisses you off (and violates HOA rules).

Posted by: SFGoth at September 26, 2021 02:10 PM (KAi1n)

134 You would prefer she not tell her daughter how it's done? and tell me again why you were in that aisle listening to strangers?
Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to

was not eavesdropping in any way, they were loud everybody was a bit surprised to hear what she was saying.

I have never had to ever be involved in any of that, however, waiting until getting home or even in the car would seem to be the thing.

maybe your mom decided to give you hygiene instructins in a store but others seem to be a bit more civilized.

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:11 PM (K3ZCc)

135 130 The best solution is to remove the gutters - except those ones right over exit and entry doorways. If there are no gutters, then they can't (a) clog or (b) overflow, yes?
Posted by: Dr_No at September 26, 2021 02:10 PM (mu5GU)

See comment #77.

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at September 26, 2021 02:11 PM (SDdx5)

136 113 The HOA that was 4 houses down from me in Kentucky had a guy that had a step stool and binoculars that went around checking for stuff.
Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (JUOKG)

He seems nice.

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 02:11 PM (6dJKT)

137 Speaking of HOAs, I mentioned in one of the morning threads yesterday about an Internet Buddy who bought himself an electric car only to be told by his HOA he couldn't charge it. Something about running the charging cable from the car to the front of his house.

Posted by: Robert - Tremonti *Marching In Time* Out NOW!!! at September 26, 2021 02:11 PM (1Yy3c)

138 and when did Americans get so fucking scared of ladders ?
Posted by: REDACTED

Well, not afraid. Just getting older. Use them in the house all the time.

Posted by: Infidel at September 26, 2021 02:12 PM (Kx3kq)

139 The best solution is to remove the gutters - except those ones right over exit and entry doorways. If there are no gutters, then they can't (a) clog or (b) overflow, yes?
Posted by: Dr_No at September 26, 2021 02:10 PM (mu5GU)


Remove the trees.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 26, 2021 02:12 PM (axyOa)

140 For that reason. I have to do some work on the riding lawnmower and since I almost cut off my thumb working on it July 2020, I can't until she's home.
=====

Sent my soninlaw back home once because he was going to mow my grass in flipflops. I told him to come back with workboots. I was even under 'weed notice' from my city at the time.

Posted by: mustbequantum at September 26, 2021 02:13 PM (MIKMs)

141 Not afraid of pain death self pissing.

Who will wheel me around ? ( Must have original female organs. )

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 26, 2021 02:13 PM (T1fV4)

142 So someone's defending the tampon talk in aisle 5 in Kroger? Society crumbles slowly, then collapses.

Posted by: Too Bad Costa Rica Sucks at September 26, 2021 02:13 PM (QZ/dC)

143 The best solution is to remove the gutters - except those ones right over exit and entry doorways. If there are no gutters, then they can't (a) clog or (b) overflow, yes?
Posted by: Dr_No at September 26, 2021 02:10 PM (mu5GU)


Remove the trees.
Posted by: Diogenes




in fairness, we do not have any trees nearer than 100 yards for fields of fire

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:14 PM (K3ZCc)

144 Just so she can drive my to the ER if necessary.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (OCTRt)

-------------

I made that resolution after an altercation with a table saw.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 02:14 PM (1EKMc)

145 maybe your mom decided to give you hygiene instructins in a store but others seem to be a bit more civilized.
Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:11 PM (K3ZCc)

Actually, my mom went the road of utter neglect, so there's really nothing there to compare. However, not everyone has the same rules regarding civility, as is apparent with this incident.

That said, I guess I'd err on the side of the mom being interested in giving her daughter fair information than not doing it at all. It isn't fun finding this stuff out on your own.

Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at September 26, 2021 02:14 PM (SDdx5)

146
I think there's some sort of extension you can attach to a leaf blower to reach gutters. I have an easily reachable, low pitch roof so I just get on it, lean over with blower and walk along. Every year that passes I wonder how much longer I'll want to risk falling 15 to 20 feet. It inspires me to keep lean and nimble.

Posted by: Traitor Joe's Military Surplus, Vaccine and Massage Parlor at September 26, 2021 02:14 PM (dQvv7)

147 if you use terra cotta the work to deliver boiling oil too

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:15 PM (K3ZCc)

148 trees have a legit value in the suburbs. It costs you to remove a tree and the stump. You know when people are short on cash when they leave the stump. But from my understanding, an old tree can at a lot to the value of a house. I don't understand how this works, but I have heard that and for reasons.

Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 02:16 PM (kmK04)

149 and when did Americans get so fucking scared of ladders ?
Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:08 PM (us2H3)


From a statistical standpoint, they're pretty damned dangerous. Fear is the beginning of wisdom...

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at September 26, 2021 02:16 PM (ZSK0i)

150 The HOA that was 4 houses down from me in Kentucky had a guy that had a step stool and binoculars that went around checking for stuff.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (JUOKG)

That guy needs some serious locker room diplomacy.

Posted by: Deplorable Ian Galt at September 26, 2021 02:08 PM


I didn't give a $hit, my house was not in the HOA. I could park my boat in the driveway, and four houses down from me they had restrictions that were ridiculous.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:16 PM (JUOKG)

151 Hearing all these scary HoA stories, I am so glad I live out in the boonies.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:16 PM (OCTRt)

152 was at the store this afternoon, there was a mother in front of me describing to her daughter how to use the maxipads and tampns they were buying, that was nice.
Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:04 PM (K3ZCc)

You would prefer she not tell her daughter how it's done? and tell me again why you were in that aisle listening to strangers?
Posted by: tcn in AK, Hail to the Thief at September 26, 2021 02:06 PM (SDdx5)


I'd of gone over to the next aisle and started explaining how to put on a condom.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 26, 2021 02:16 PM (axyOa)

153 Lotsa ads (Northern Illinois) for leaf guards for rain gutters. One truly amusing ad had a Biden clone as the ignoramus falling off a ladder and bemoaning not buying that system.

------------------
God I hate that ad....they run it literally every half hour on the rerun channels here. The profit margins on Leaf Gard must be enormous to cover all that advertising.

Posted by: Bigsmith at September 26, 2021 02:16 PM (G/mW5)

154 I have about 1500 feet of hill behind ny house. Luckily, about 400 feet behind my house, there is a deep creek that runs all along my driveway down to the river which is about 1000 ft from my house

and even with that natural solution, when I bought my house, one of the first thing I did was put in a 6 inch drainage system with a few catch drains in the back. Takes the runoff down to the creek and out to the river

my only problem is the when the creek goes under the public rd, it's into a 2 ft galvanized culvert, which is one helluva bottleneck

but it aint mine to fix

Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:17 PM (us2H3)

155 the road of utter neglect, so there's really nothing there to compare. However, not everyone has the same rules regarding civility, as is apparent with this incident.

That said, I guess I'd err on the side of the mom being interested in giving her daughter fair information than not doing it at all. It isn't fun finding this stuff out on your own.
Posted by: tcn in AK, H


if you do not have five minutes in the car to go over feminine hygiene your daughter maybe you are in the wrong business.

ffs

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:18 PM (K3ZCc)

156 It seems a bit uncouth to talk about female hygiene practice at the checkout in a grocery store but that would have been the perfect moment to look momma dead in the eye with a mischievous little grin while waggling your eyebrows.

Posted by: Robert - Tremonti *Marching In Time* Out NOW!!! at September 26, 2021 02:18 PM (1Yy3c)

157 I think there's some sort of extension you can attach to a leaf blower to reach gutters. I have an easily reachable, low pitch roof so I just get on it, lean over with blower and walk along. Every year that passes I wonder how much longer I'll want to risk falling 15 to 20 feet. It inspires me to keep lean and nimble.
Posted by: Traitor Joe's Military Surplus,


Also one you can attach to a garden hose and use water to blow it out.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:18 PM (OCTRt)

158 I always hated it when my dad got on the roof. He loved his leaf blower like most men do. But I always hated it when he got on that roof. Nothing made me happier than the time it was over.

Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 02:18 PM (kmK04)

159 I'd of gone over to the next aisle and started explaining how to put on a condom.

What? No live demonstration?

Posted by: Reuben Hick at September 26, 2021 02:18 PM (+LCoQ)

160 when my dad and grandpa were doing roof stuff they moved the car under where they were working so they would hit the hood of the statin wagn instead of the ground, said it was softer.

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:19 PM (K3ZCc)

161 gutters, leaves and feminine products on aSunday afternoon?

Posted by: will choose a nic later at September 26, 2021 02:19 PM (bTQ72)

162 Also one you can attach to a garden hose and use water to blow it out.
Posted by: r


yeah, that is not how tampns work

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:20 PM (K3ZCc)

163 149 and when did Americans get so fucking scared of ladders ?
Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:08 PM (us2H3)

From a statistical standpoint, they're pretty damned dangerous. Fear is the beginning of wisdom...
Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at September 26, 2021 02:16 PM (ZSK0i)

humans are generally useless

guns, cars, chainsaws and now ladders

fucking idiots

Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:20 PM (us2H3)

164 I always accidentally drop a whole carton of Off Road Condoms right by a lady.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 26, 2021 02:20 PM (T1fV4)

165 130 The best solution is to remove the gutters - except those ones right over exit and entry doorways. If there are no gutters, then they can't (a) clog or (b) overflow, yes?

Posted by: Dr_No at September 26, 2021 02:10 PM (mu5GU)


Agreed. Putting my Sunday Afternoon Engineer hat on, I think a good solution may be to install concrete gutters on the ground, below the roof edges. About a foot wide, to catch wind-blown falling water. The design I have in mind is a basically a concrete gutter downspout diverter, all around the house, graded to run the water to where you want it go. The gutter channel to be 2-3 inches deep. I am sure y'all will know a million things wrong with this, that I have not thought of.

Posted by: Gref at September 26, 2021 02:20 PM (AMIL/)

166 The HOA says that rain barrels are ugly. And yes, they inspect the back yard.

They change to rules constantly to make everything more restrictive. And they've changed the rules to make it difficult to vote the board out. We're moving, and we can't leave fast enough.

Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at September 26, 2021 02:21 PM (OQcPl)

167 I'd of gone over to the next aisle and started explaining how to put on a condom.
Posted by: Diogenes


if the mom could do that she would not have to be doing the naps and tampns in the store.

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:21 PM (K3ZCc)

168 I always accidentally drop a whole carton of Off Road Condoms right by a lady.
Posted by: Humphreyrobot


The ones with the big treads?

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:22 PM (OCTRt)

169 Agreed. Putting my Sunday Afternoon Engineer hat on, I think a good solution may be to install concrete gutters on the ground, below the roof edges. About a foot wide, to catch wind-blown falling water. The design I have in mind is a basically a concrete gutter downspout diverter, all around the house, graded to run the water to where you want it go. The gutter channel to be 2-3 inches deep. I am sure y'all will know a million things wrong with this, that I have not thought of.
Posted by: Gref at September 26, 2021 02:20 PM (AMIL/)

wasn't it Edison that made furniture

out of concrete

Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:22 PM (us2H3)

170 I'd of gone over to the next aisle and started explaining how to put on a condom.
Posted by: Diogenes at September 26, 2021 02:16 PM (axyOa)

Go to the fresh foods section and demonstrate with a banana.

Posted by: Robert - Tremonti *Marching In Time* Out NOW!!! at September 26, 2021 02:22 PM (1Yy3c)

171 gutters, leaves and feminine products on aSunday afternoon?
Posted by: will choose a nic later at September 26, 2021 02:19 PM (bTQ72)


Well. Weasel is up later.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 26, 2021 02:22 PM (axyOa)

172
could be worse, could be prince harry nagged to death by a lunitic

Posted by: will choose a nic later at September 26, 2021 02:23 PM (bTQ72)

173 @158 I always hated it when my dad got on the roof. He loved his leaf blower like most men do. But I always hated it when he got on that roof. Nothing made me happier than the time it was over.

_________

I had the same 'High Pucker Factor' response one afternoon when I walked home from school, looked up, and saw (a) the extension ladder racked all the way out next to the house and, (b) Dad casually strolling along the 40' high rooftop in his overalls wearing his favorite crepe-soled canvas-top loafers while he looked for damaged slate tiles. I went inside as quick as possible 'cos I didn't want to have to watch him fall if that happened. He came inside about 30 minutes later, still intact and whole. Damn, that was scary. I guess that's why I don't like ladders now . . . ?

Posted by: Dr_No at September 26, 2021 02:24 PM (mu5GU)

174 165 130 The best solution is to remove the gutters - except those ones right over exit and entry doorways. If there are no gutters, then they can't (a) clog or (b) overflow, yes?

Posted by: Dr_No at September 26, 2021 02:10 PM (mu5GU)

I ageee wholeheartedly with this

brilliant, just fucking brilliant

Posted by: MR Foundation Repair Squirrel at September 26, 2021 02:24 PM (us2H3)

175 ...That's when I first realized your house is always trying to kill you.

Posted by: dartist at September 26, 2021 02:09 PM (+ya+t)
---------

Owning a house is much like owning a boat.
And the older you become the more like a boat it becomes.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 02:25 PM (1EKMc)

176 Agreed. Putting my Sunday Afternoon Engineer hat on, I think a good solution may be to install concrete gutters on the ground, below the roof edges. About a foot wide, to catch wind-blown falling water. The design I have in mind is a basically a concrete gutter downspout diverter, all around the house, graded to run the water to where you want it go. The gutter channel to be 2-3 inches deep. I am sure y'all will know a million things wrong with this, that I have not thought of.
Posted by: Gref


Sounds cool. Only question I have, is how high is splash back from roof height?

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:25 PM (OCTRt)

177 gutters, leaves and feminine products on aSunday afternoon?
Posted by: will choose a nic later at September 26, 2021 02:19 PM (bTQ72)

All things that need to be taken care of when they get wet.

Posted by: Robert - Tremonti *Marching In Time* Out NOW!!! at September 26, 2021 02:25 PM (1Yy3c)

178 166 The HOA says that rain barrels are ugly. And yes, they inspect the back yard.

They change to rules constantly to make everything more restrictive. And they've changed the rules to make it difficult to vote the board out. We're moving, and we can't leave fast enough.
Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at September 26, 2021 02:21 PM (OQcPl)

I would've guessed "recycling water" would beat out "ugly." But I've never been in an HOA.

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 02:26 PM (6dJKT)

179 Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:19 PM (K3ZCc)

Redneck trampoline?

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 02:26 PM (Q9lwr)

180 HOA's sound like legit jagoffs. When growing up we had a few that would comment on a bush or something. If your lawn got really long someone might look askance. But there were no HOA's as I understand them. My comment is to find the farthest place you can live, realize it will be taken over in a few years, and go much farther.

Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 02:26 PM (kmK04)

181 172 could be worse, could be prince harry nagged to death by a lunitic
Posted by: will choose a nic later at September 26, 2021 02:23 PM (bTQ72)

Oh, that would be terrible.

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 02:26 PM (6dJKT)

182 Redneck trampoline?
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo


that is about right.

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:27 PM (K3ZCc)

183 Poor C5th. If you can't handle the seething masses you can always install the app and do grocery delivery or pickup at the store.

Posted by: PaleRider is simply Irredeemable at September 26, 2021 02:27 PM (pxVvf)

184 But I've never been in an HOA.
Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 02:26 PM (6dJKT)


That's smart. I'll never buy a house with one again.

Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at September 26, 2021 02:28 PM (OQcPl)

185 158 I always hated it when my dad got on the roof. He loved his leaf blower like most men do. But I always hated it when he got on that roof. Nothing made me happier than the time it was over.
Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 02:18 PM (kmK04)

I remember when I was just a kid, maybe 21, I bought my first house

while I was reroofing it, my Dad, ex Marine, perched himself on the ridge with a Coleman jug full of martinis.

telling me on every nail, "you're doing it all wrong !!"

biggest fucking straw boss ever

Posted by: MR Foundation Repair Squirrel at September 26, 2021 02:28 PM (us2H3)

186 176 Agreed. Putting my Sunday Afternoon Engineer hat on, I think a good solution may be to install concrete gutters on the ground, below the roof edges. About a foot wide, to catch wind-blown falling water. The design I have in mind is a basically a concrete gutter downspout diverter, all around the house, graded to run the water to where you want it go. The gutter channel to be 2-3 inches deep. I am sure y'all will know a million things wrong with this, that I have not thought of.
Posted by: Gref


Sounds cool. Only question I have, is how high is splash back from roof height?

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:25 PM (OCTRt)


Unknown. I'm confident the idea is workable, but by the time all the design details are worked out the result may look abominable alongside many houses.

Posted by: Gref at September 26, 2021 02:29 PM (AMIL/)

187 The profit margins on . . .
=====

OTA TV is inexpensive vs mailings. How many packets of mail ads do you read?

Some of the local ads show some real promise for wit and amusement. I'm sure you can recite and hum the carpet jingle. I think that is how JG Wentworth and their opera ads became so much fun. Other music genres didn't work as well, so they have gone back to the opera.

Posted by: mustbequantum at September 26, 2021 02:29 PM (MIKMs)

188 FFS, indeed!

The discussion of feminine products needs to be in the aisle with the feminine products, so that other women can chime in. Just like the discussions when I was in Ace Hardware with my dad, only it involved vents and tools.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 02:29 PM (/+bwe)

189 Poor C5th. If you can't handle the seething masses you can always install the app and do grocery delivery or pickup at the store.
Posted by: PaleRider is simply



where did your mom teach you feminine hygiene?

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:29 PM (K3ZCc)

190 The HOA says that rain barrels are ugly. And yes, they inspect the back yard.


They'll shit when they see all the cows in my backyard.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:30 PM (OCTRt)

191 Remove the trees.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 26, 2021 02:12 PM (axyOa)
------------

Uncle loved the woods but hated trees around the house.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 02:30 PM (1EKMc)

192 Remove the trees.
Posted by: Diogene

******

The leaves from our cottonwoods can travel great distances. I have sat on the deck in the fall watching leaves blow up to several hundred feet, traveling on the wind. Truth be told I was rooting for most of them to reach the neighbor's yard.

Posted by: Muldoon at September 26, 2021 02:30 PM (Xwt96)

193 "Much of the downhill portion of the house is built on red rock, which obviously doesn't soak up any water. -- the rest of them run into a 1,000 gallon seepage pit mandated by the fvcking retard village engineer."

OK ... I don't understand the seepage pit part, but for the rest, maybe bentonite on top could seal the area close to the house. That is what they use to seal wells from ground water, or to keep ponds from leaking into rocky formations. ... Downspouts should all be routed to the street afaik. ... draining away from the house is pretty fundamental, so I'm obviously missing something ... more booze is a decent solution.

Posted by: illiniwek at September 26, 2021 02:30 PM (Cus5s)

194 @176 Agreed. Putting my Sunday Afternoon Engineer hat on, I think a good solution may be to install concrete gutters on the ground, below the roof edges.

_______

I neglected to add that there were concrete gutters on the ground in the drip zone, so there wasn't a lot of dirt to be lost to runoff - and very little dirt-splat on the house from the falling water. If I hadn't had them, the gutters were still coming off 'cos they were an exceptionally high pain-in-the-ass factor every year when the pecan trees dropped their leaves (and the trees are a completely diff'rent 'nuther story).

Posted by: Dr_No at September 26, 2021 02:31 PM (mu5GU)

195 owning a car is worse than either of those options. Go to a junkyard and they all look the same. That issue is one of the few big ones I got into here. It is funny what sets people off. It is is never religion, politics, the Civil War, or Long Bows. That is the one thing I have learned here.

Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 02:31 PM (kmK04)

196 Unknown. I'm confident the idea is workable, but by the time all the design details are worked out the result may look abominable alongside many houses.
Posted by: Gref

Plant bushes all along the front of the troughs, and no one will ever see them.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:31 PM (OCTRt)

197 I thought that cttnwoods were just big weeds?

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:31 PM (K3ZCc)

198 probably next weekend

breaking out the old cyclone rake

works like a charm

Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:32 PM (us2H3)

199 Is this bit of concentrated nastiness - https://tinyurl.com/mmem5vcu - a first-world problem?

Posted by: aelfheld at September 26, 2021 02:32 PM (Zy9Yy)

200 79 there's so much junk that will clog the runs, acorns and maple spinners
Posted by: irongrampa at September 26, 2021 01:56 PM (KATBx)

I never knew that's what they were called!

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 02:33 PM (6dJKT)

201 Whoa, an inadvertent "200."

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 02:33 PM (6dJKT)

202 But I've never been in an HOA.
Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 02:26 PM (6dJKT)


That's smart. I'll never buy a house with one again.

Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at September 26, 2021 02:28 PM


The last two house we bought the first condition was NO HOA!, period. We passed up some nice houses because they had an HOA. The real estate lady was, oh, it's only one page, and I said, it's only one page now, what is it going to be in 20 years.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:33 PM (JUOKG)

203 I put fresh sealant around my kitchen sink today. It wasn't leaking, it just looked bad. I had been asking my husband to do it since forever and finally gave up and tried it. Is there a trick to making it look nice, or is it all just practice?

Posted by: Funsize (EiPf6) at September 26, 2021 02:34 PM (EiPf6)

204 biggest fucking straw boss ever
Posted by: MR Foundation Repair Squirrel at September 26, 2021 02:28 PM (us2H3)

Haha, funny story

Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 26, 2021 02:34 PM (WF/xn)

205 the thing is is, hoas are a bitch, but in some states they are needed

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:34 PM (K3ZCc)

206 180 HOA's sound like legit jagoffs. When growing up we had a few that would comment on a bush or something. If your lawn got really long someone might look askance. But there were no HOA's as I understand them. My comment is to find the farthest place you can live, realize it will be taken over in a few years, and go much farther.
Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 02:26 PM

A few weeks ago, I noticed my neighbor has a post on his door. His house has been condemned after more than three years without taking out garbage, saplings allowed to take root and tower everywhere, and trash accumulating on the porch and driveway.

I still wouldn't want an HOA.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 02:34 PM (/+bwe)

207 197 I thought that cttnwoods were just big weeds?
Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:31 PM (K3ZCc)

I'd probably burn it

I burn popple all the time

I think it's basically the same

just gotta reload the stoves every 2-3 hours instead of 6-8

Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:35 PM (us2H3)

208 I put fresh sealant around my kitchen sink today. It wasn't leaking, it just looked bad. I had been asking my husband to do it since forever and finally gave up and tried it. Is there a trick to making it look nice, or is it all just practice?
Posted by: Funsize (EiPf6) at September 26, 2021 02:34 PM (EiPf6)

Wet your finger when smoothing it keep it wet

Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 26, 2021 02:35 PM (WF/xn)

209 My snack is gone. Back to the heat for another short session of yard maintenance for me. 1st world problem, having a desk job, so I never get acclimated to heat, or hours of manual labor period and having acres of property to maintain.

Posted by: PaleRider is simply Irredeemable at September 26, 2021 02:35 PM (pxVvf)

210 A few weeks ago, I noticed my neighbor has a post on his door. His house has been condemned after more than three years without taking out garbage, saplings allowed to take root and tower everywhere, and trash accumulating on the porch and driveway.

I still wouldn't want an HOA.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 02:34 PM


We have that here. No mowing for 18 months houses that look like they belong in the ghetto of Mogadishu, but I still don't want any HOA. I just keep pestering the County code compliance guy and he gets tired of hearing me bitch and stuff eventually gets cleaned up.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:36 PM (JUOKG)

211 just gotta reload the stoves every 2-3 hours instead of 6-8
Posted by: R




Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:36 PM (K3ZCc)

212 204 biggest fucking straw boss ever
Posted by: MR Foundation Repair Squirrel at September 26, 2021 02:28 PM (us2H3)

Haha, funny story
Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 26, 2021 02:34 PM (WF/xn)

Oh yeah, my dad was a blast

*rolls eyes*

Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:36 PM (us2H3)

213 @206 - A few weeks ago, I noticed my neighbor has a post on his door. His house has been condemned after more than three years without taking out garbage, saplings allowed to take root and tower everywhere, and trash accumulating on the porch and driveway.

______

Didn't we see his place on 'Hoarders' ... ?

Posted by: Dr_No at September 26, 2021 02:37 PM (mu5GU)

214 They do make small tools for smoothing the caulking as well

Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 26, 2021 02:37 PM (WF/xn)

215 Wet your finger when smoothing it keep it wet
Posted by: H\




FFS

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:37 PM (K3ZCc)

216 I thought that cttnwoods were just big weeds?
=====

Allergy nightmares.

Posted by: mustbequantum at September 26, 2021 02:38 PM (MIKMs)

217 @ 208: Wet your finger when smoothing it keep it wet

_________

That'd be a great opening statement for a story ...

Posted by: Dr_No at September 26, 2021 02:38 PM (mu5GU)

218 No HOA but have to pay for irrigation water. $185 a year. City water to expensive for grass, shrubs, trees.

Posted by: Infidel at September 26, 2021 02:38 PM (Kx3kq)

219 An extension kit may be purchased from the devil at Amzon.
Ad a tube extension, the air moves faster and you have more reach then add the u-turn snorkel, voila the perfect leaf gutter blower.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 02:39 PM (1EKMc)

220 203 I put fresh sealant around my kitchen sink today. It wasn't leaking, it just looked bad. I had been asking my husband to do it since forever and finally gave up and tried it. Is there a trick to making it look nice, or is it all just practice?
Posted by: Funsize (EiPf6) at September 26, 2021 02:34 PM (EiPf6)

With caulk, I use the side of a dime to smooth and shape it. There are tools for it, but they cost more than a dime.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 02:39 PM (/+bwe)

221 26 20 CBD
That's unfortunate.
CO, WA and OR have all attempted to forbid rain barrels claiming that water falling from the sky is state property.
Water rights are a huge issue out west and the laws and rules are incredibly dense and Byzantine. IIRC there was an attorney in Denver who spent a 30 year career on one case about water rights. It remains unresolved.
Posted by: Winston, GOPe, not one dime, not one vote at September 26, 2021 01:19 PM (FtJ1S)

In one of those states (Say WA?) they'll tell you that if some lowlife scumbag dumps a truckload of trash on your property, it's yours and your problem to dispose of. So, in that case, they can go fornicate themselves on the rainwater collection.

(Incidentally, my phone tried to autocarrot "scumbag" to "Schumer". It knows me!!)

Posted by: Shepherd Lover at September 26, 2021 02:40 PM (fsCiS)

222 I still wouldn't want an HOA.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 02:34 PM (/+bwe)

there was a time when that would bother me. I know people can take advantage of it. I have seen some shit but to be fair, much less than the average guy. in this time and place, the ne'er do well can likely be bought out. Everything has a price today. Let the HOA buy them out if they don't do their bidding.

Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 02:41 PM (kmK04)

223 just gotta reload the stoves every 2-3 hours instead of 6-8
Posted by: R

I remember poplar ash being a pain to clean up. So much of it in comparison to other wood.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 02:41 PM (/+bwe)

224 wasn't it Edison that made furniture

out of concrete
Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:22 PM (us2H3)

-----------

I believe Capone pioneered concrete footwear.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 26, 2021 02:41 PM (VxC1e)

225 We have that here. No mowing for 18 months houses that look like they belong in the ghetto of Mogadishu, but I still don't want any HOA. I just keep pestering the County code compliance guy and he gets tired of hearing me bitch and stuff eventually gets cleaned up.
Posted by: Mister Scott


Don't need an HoA if you have a code enforcement nazi. Had that in the last city I lived in. He'd drive the alleys and stand in the bed of the truck to look over the fences.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:42 PM (OCTRt)

226 176 Agreed. Putting my Sunday Afternoon Engineer hat on, I think a good solution may be to install concrete gutters on the ground, below the roof edges. About a foot wide, to catch wind-blown falling water. The design I have in mind is a basically a concrete gutter downspout diverter, all around the house, graded to run the water to where you want it go. The gutter channel to be 2-3 inches deep. I am sure y'all will know a million things wrong with this, that I have not thought of.
Posted by: Gref


I saw something like that made of stone, in Pompeii.

Posted by: Javems at September 26, 2021 02:43 PM (AmoqO)

227 Posted by: Shepherd Lover at

Howdy there! How are you? How are mom and dad? We are going to do a PNWMOME next June. Please come.

Posted by: nurse ratched at September 26, 2021 02:44 PM (U2p+3)

228 With caulk, I use the side of a dime to smooth and shape it. There are tools for it, but they cost more than a dime.
Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 02:39 PM (/+bwe)
---------

So you're the guy who keeps putting the caulk on all the dimes.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 26, 2021 02:44 PM (VxC1e)

229 I believe Capone pioneered concrete footwear.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 26, 2021 02:41 PM (VxC1e)

lol

Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:44 PM (us2H3)

230
Don't need an HoA if you have a code enforcement nazi. Had that in the last city I lived in. He'd drive the alleys and stand in the bed of the truck to look over the fences.
Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:42 PM (OCTRt)


What a shitty job that would be

Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 26, 2021 02:44 PM (WF/xn)

231 The last two house we bought the first condition was NO HOA!, period. We passed up some nice houses because they had an HOA. The real estate lady was, oh, it's only one page, and I said, it's only one page now, what is it going to be in 20 years.
Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:33 PM (JUOKG)


This is true! When we bought this house 19 years ago the covenants were almost 10 pages (including the title page). Now it's more than 100 (not including the addendums with assorted forms). Ridiculous.

Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at September 26, 2021 02:45 PM (OQcPl)

232 In the country the closest town every spring gives notice of free city dump for almost anything for a month. City also gives notice that after the free period citations for crappy property will be issued and enforced.

Cleanest little town you ever saw no matter what neighborhood you drive through.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 02:45 PM (1EKMc)

233 I was reading an interesting story about ferro cncrete boats and how they were a big thing in the 70s that guys were building at home

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:45 PM (K3ZCc)

234 I am too Catholic to teach anyone about condoms.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 02:46 PM (xopIz)

235 Not that I am not a sinner and didn't use them.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 02:46 PM (xopIz)

236 We have a HOA in a 27 house/lot community at the edge of the Bitterroot Mtns. Gated front entrance. It's too funny. The only thing they keep out with that gate is, well nothing. And the HOA only flexes it's muscles when you have too many critters on your property. I have 4 pullets, can only get one more critters. I'm thinking a cow.

Posted by: neverenoughcaffeine at September 26, 2021 02:46 PM (2NHgQ)

237 231 the covenants
Posted by: G. Gnome will not comply at September 26, 2021 02:45 PM (OQcPl)

That right there is wack.

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 02:47 PM (6dJKT)

238
I always hated it when my dad got on the roof. He loved his leaf blower like most men do. But I always hated it when he got on that roof. Nothing made me happier than the time it was over.
Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 02:18 PM (kmK04)



I go over to my dad's place on Tuesdays to help him around the house. I've re-roofed the patio, lots of tree trimming, redone the gutters, fixed fencing and gates etc. He's 82 and still pretty spry, so if I wasn't around he'd be up on a ladder at the drop of a hat.

My stepmom basically informed me that she'd skin me alive if I allowed him to even step foot on a ladder, not to mention getting on a roof.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 26, 2021 02:47 PM (n+4am)

239 I had a ranch style with roof patter jutting forward on each side of the house, so in the middle, during a hard rain all the water was directed towards the center third of the front of the house and overflow the rain gutter. I changed it to a super large rain gutter and emptying into a 6 inch buried pvc pipe emptying into a french drain. at the property edge.

That problem was solved, then I had to fix the water damage it already did over a 20 year span, which was a lot of damage.

Posted by: Jimco Industries at September 26, 2021 02:48 PM (buTO7)

240 Well, I see the new gov of NY is a real peach too. No UI if you refuse to get the jab and get let go. Why are they so intent on forcing the jab for something that has 99% survival rate?

Nevermind, I know the answer.

Posted by: Infidel at September 26, 2021 02:48 PM (Kx3kq)

241 I am too Catholic to teach anyone about condoms.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 02:46 PM (xopIz)

All I know is they not very good for making balloon animals.

Posted by: Robert - Tremonti *Marching In Time* Out NOW!!! at September 26, 2021 02:49 PM (1Yy3c)

242 The design I have in mind is a basically a concrete gutter downspout diverter, all around the house, graded to run the water to where you want it go. The gutter channel to be 2-3 inches deep. I am sure y'all will know a million things wrong with this, that I have not thought of.
Posted by: Gref

I saw something like that made of stone, in Pompeii.
Posted by: Javems

You could creative and use different materials for the runs. Terra Cotta, fiberglass, concrete, tile, etc.
Figure out the technical details and you've got a business idea.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:49 PM (OCTRt)

243 I remember poplar ash being a pain to clean up. So much of it in comparison to other wood.
Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 02:41 PM (/+bwe)

I don't really see any difference

I like ash cause it burns well right off the saw

Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:49 PM (us2H3)

244 I go over to my dad's place on Tuesdays to help him around the house. I've re-roofed the patio, lots of tree trimming, redone the gutters, fixed fencing and gates etc. He's 82 and still pretty spry, so if I wasn't around he'd be up on a ladder at the drop of a hat.

My stepmom basically informed me that she'd skin me alive if I allowed him to even step foot on a ladder, not to mention getting on a roof.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur


That's so cool of you. I don't have any old people to take care of. And everyone here is convinced we're all going to get the rona and die, so you can't even volunteer.

Posted by: nurse ratched at September 26, 2021 02:50 PM (U2p+3)

245 That problem was solved, then I had to fix the water damage it already did over a 20 year span, which was a lot of damage.

Posted by: Jimco Industries at September 26, 2021 02:48 PM (buTO7)
---------------------

Did you put a clean-out on the French drain?

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 02:50 PM (1EKMc)

246 there was a time when that would bother me. I know people can take advantage of it. I have seen some shit but to be fair, much less than the average guy. in this time and place, the ne'er do well can likely be bought out. Everything has a price today. Let the HOA buy them out if they don't do their bidding.
Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 02:41 PM

This guy couldn't be bought out. His house was a repo paid for by a trust, so he always had a place to store his boat and hang out between girlfriends.

He is very much a rebel; ask him to clean up, and it just gets worse. When I realized there were no lights in his house and he seemed to be sleeping in his car, I went to see him. No, he was fine, just charging up his phone and watching TV through it in the car. Showered and slept in the house.

Also informed me that he was collecting the enhanced unemployment while working under the table 50 hours a week. The drawback was autopay for electricity (through the trust?) had screwed him over. Totally not his fault and nothing he wanted to deal with.


Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 02:51 PM (/+bwe)

247 OT, these garlic and onion "pub style" pretzels I got at Aldi are the bomb. Shit. They should pay me for the advertising.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 02:51 PM (xopIz)

248 there is no way I would shower without lights

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:53 PM (K3ZCc)

249 Did you put a clean-out on the French drain?
Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 02:50 PM (1EKMc)

French and clean in the same sentence

probably a first

Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:54 PM (us2H3)

250 I always keep a condom in the tool box.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 26, 2021 02:54 PM (T1fV4)

251 Don't need an HoA if you have a code enforcement nazi. Had that in the last city I lived in. He'd drive the alleys and stand in the bed of the truck to look over the fences.
------------
Had them here. Walk down the street with a clipboard making notes on each house. Gave me a ticket for greyed out shingles from 1924. Gave me 10 days to have them painted. This is just a suburb of Chicago mind you, no HOA. Had a hard time restraining myself.

Posted by: dartist at September 26, 2021 02:54 PM (+ya+t)

252 "CO, WA and OR have all attempted to forbid rain barrels claiming that water falling from the sky is state property."

It must be more about collecting revenue from water bills than conserving water. The little rain collection by individuals would have nearly zero impact on what goes downstream. They will use water anyway.

And if they collect right off their roof, there are fewer runoff problems, and less water has to be treated, just to be returned to the house later (which wastes energy, as well).

Places like Arizona (from my YouTube education) now allow more rainfall collection, especially in outlying areas where much runoff is lost to evaporation and ?? just lost in the desert I guess.

Posted by: illiniwek at September 26, 2021 02:55 PM (Cus5s)

253 248 there is no way I would shower without lights
Posted by: confederatefifth

Well. When the power is out, and you have to go to work, well. Candles kinda work.

Posted by: nurse ratched at September 26, 2021 02:55 PM (U2p+3)

254 This guy couldn't be bought out. His house was a repo paid for by a trust, so he always had a place to store his boat and hang out between girlfriends.

Posted by: NaughtyPine


Bet the house could have burned down. And purposely made to look like they were trying to hide arson for insurance theft. Wink wink nod nod.

Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:55 PM (OCTRt)

255 My SiL's dad went on Thanksgiving, by himself, with a chainsaw to do some work.

They found him later, dead.

Never want to spend Thanksgiving with SiL again.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 02:55 PM (xopIz)

256 So what do they do about swimming pools if rain barrels are illegal ?

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:55 PM (K3ZCc)

257 So you're the guy who keeps putting the caulk on all the dimes.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 26, 2021 02:44 PM (VxC1e)

you're on fire today

lol

Posted by: REDACTED at September 26, 2021 02:56 PM (us2H3)

258 Did you put a clean-out on the French drain?
Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 02:50 PM (1EKMc)
----
No, but I did sell the house. The front porch was concrete, and it was angled in to the house, ruined the sill plate. Had to replace the driveway where it met the garage, that was also sunken. Spent months in the crawl space doing work. One contractor at the begining said, a check for 10k will get me started. I did it all myself for about 7k.

Posted by: Jimco Industries at September 26, 2021 02:56 PM (buTO7)

259 253 248 there is no way I would shower without lights
Posted by: confederatefifth

Well. When the power is out, and you have to go to work, well. Candles kinda work.

Posted by: nurse ratched at September 26, 2021 02:55 PM (U2p+3)
-----------------------

I still remember where my body parts are.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 02:56 PM (1EKMc)

260 248 there is no way I would shower without lights
Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:53 PM (K3ZCc)

Funny you should mention that! The lights went out yesterday morning when I was in the shower. I am so used to blackouts now that I finished, dried off, and got the flashlight in the dark.

But I DID notice that there was a gigantic spider on the doorframe of my bedroom closet. If I thought those were in the bathroom, I'd rather be sponge-bathing in the kitchen by the window.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 02:57 PM (/+bwe)

261 If you had a multifunctional flashlight....you would have fewer problems.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 26, 2021 02:57 PM (T1fV4)

262 Water falling from the sky is a gift from God.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 02:57 PM (xopIz)

263 Well. When the power is out, and you have to go to work, well. Candles kinda work.
Posted by: n


there are better ways to do it but is just a mattr of time until somebody murders you.

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:57 PM (K3ZCc)

264 The leaves from our cottonwoods can travel great distances. I have sat on the deck in the fall watching leaves blow up to several hundred feet, traveling on the wind. Truth be told I was rooting for most of them to reach the neighbor's yard.
Posted by: Muldoon at September 26, 2021 02:30 PM (Xwt96)

I do the same but the cottonwoods arent the problem. Its all the dang flowering plum trees.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 26, 2021 02:58 PM (axyOa)

265
It must be more about collecting revenue from water bills than conserving water.

Posted by: illiniwek at September 26, 2021 02:55 PM (Cus5s)


I suspect that it's more about the power trip of raining on someone's parade. Pun totally intended.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 26, 2021 02:58 PM (n+4am)

266 But I DID notice that there was a gigantic spider on the doorframe of my bedroom closet. If I thought those were in the bathroom, I'd rather be sponge-bathing in the kitchen by the window.
Posted by: N

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 02:58 PM (K3ZCc)

267 Also informed me that he was collecting the enhanced unemployment while working under the table 50 hours a week. The drawback was autopay for electricity (through the trust?) had screwed him over. Totally not his fault and nothing he wanted to deal with.


Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 02:51 PM (/+bwe)

like I said, go far afield if you can. There will always be crazies. I remember a guy that kept a run down horse stables that was worth tens of millions, just for the land. I also remember some guys in horse country that inherited their place. The place had a huge hole in the roof. It was called "the crazy lady's place" If there are not a thousand places with the same moniker in this country, I would be very surprised.

Posted by: Quint at September 26, 2021 02:58 PM (kmK04)

268
OT, these garlic and onion "pub style" pretzels I got at Aldi are the bomb. Shit. They should pay me for the advertising.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 26, 2021 02:51 PM


Yeah, Aldi's is the bomb for cheap as hell knock-off snacks. Prices are about 30% of the grocery store. Why pay $3.00 at the grocery story when you can get something that tastes even better for less then a dollar?

Posted by: Traitor Joe's Military Surplus, Vaccine and Massage Parlor at September 26, 2021 02:59 PM (dQvv7)

269 there are better ways to do it but is just a mattr of time until somebody murders you.
Posted by: confederatefifth

I have a gun in the bathroom.

Posted by: nurse ratched at September 26, 2021 02:59 PM (U2p+3)

270 Serial killers are attracted to candles. Especially movie star candles.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 26, 2021 02:59 PM (T1fV4)

271 I have a gun in the bathroom.
Posted by: n



that is quite the pick up line

Posted by: confederatefifth at September 26, 2021 03:01 PM (K3ZCc)

272
there are better ways to do it but is just a mattr of time until somebody murders you.
Posted by: confederatefifth

I have a gun in the bathroom.
Posted by: nurse ratched at September 26, 2021 02:59 PM (U2p+3)


That's hawt.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 26, 2021 03:01 PM (n+4am)

273 Bet the house could have burned down. And purposely made to look like they were trying to hide arson for insurance theft. Wink wink nod nod.
Posted by: rickb223 at September 26, 2021 02:55 PM

But I like my house!

We both have "starter homes" (less than 1K square feet) on 1/8 acre each. So a driveway separates our houses. Did I mention he has trash trees everywhere and his house is full of trash? Basically, kindling. The house on the other side is an old-fashioned wooden house with a wooden privacy fence.



Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 03:01 PM (/+bwe)

274 I have a gun in the bathroom.
Posted by: nurse ratched at September 26, 2021 02:59 PM (U2p+3)

What caliber is best for shitter defense?

Mmmmm, no...this is a question best left for the Gun Thread.

Posted by: Robert - Tremonti *Marching In Time* Out NOW!!! at September 26, 2021 03:02 PM (1Yy3c)

275 noodfood

Posted by: m at September 26, 2021 03:02 PM (6dJKT)

276 That's in the works for the one gutter that contributes, but the rest of them run into a 1,000 gallon seepage pit mandated by the fvcking retard village engineer.

My architect's argument that the pit was, out of necessity, going to be dug into impermeable rock and would do nothing but immediately overflow fell on his shit-clogged deaf ears.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 26, 2021 01:49 PM (Q9lwr)

Two words: stealth pump.

Get an electric submersible pump rated at a few hundred gallons per hour, place in seepage pit. Conceal outlet hose by burial, and direct outflow into a storm sewer, or even the sanitary sewer.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at September 26, 2021 03:02 PM (zV3Na)

277 "these garlic and onion "pub style" pretzels I got at Aldi are the bomb."

I just opened a Wernesgruner beer from Aldi, which I find quite adequate ... shoulda bought some of those pretzels to go with it.

Posted by: illiniwek at September 26, 2021 03:04 PM (Cus5s)

278 Not all gutter installs are properly sloped to the point where the downspout is located. I had to correct a couple runs on our house due to the installer going by standard that the soffit/fascia are always level

Posted by: Rex B at September 26, 2021 03:06 PM (kromb)

279 If you had a multifunctional flashlight....you would have fewer problems.
Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 26, 2021 02:57 PM

Fun fact I learned last week: My multifunction flashlight has plugs for charging a phone - but the phone seems to have a protective feature that won't let it charge that way. So I crank-charged a portable battery, then use the battery to charge the phone.

I really need to find a kerosene heater for about 200 square feet, no bigger. Everything I look at is rickety and has bad reviews.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 26, 2021 03:07 PM (/+bwe)

280 That guy needs some serious locker room diplomacy.

Posted by: Deplorable Ian Galt at September 26, 2021 02:08 PM


I didn't give a $hit, my house was not in the HOA. I could park my boat in the driveway, and four houses down from me they had restrictions that were ridiculous.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 26, 2021 02:16 PM (JUOKG)

I get it.
He just needs to get his ass beat out of principle.

Posted by: Deplorable Ian Galt at September 26, 2021 03:08 PM (ufFY8)

281 Got a long run at the back. The highest spot is in the middle with a downspout at each end.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 03:08 PM (1EKMc)

282 Let the HOA buy them out if they don't do their bidding.

HOA boards usually prefer to slap liens on the property and use that as pretext to foreclose, spending fractions of a penny on the dollar to acquire the property. Then they sell it off and dump the profit into some fund or another that may or not go to improving "common areas".

Posted by: Blanco Basura - moronhorde.com. Not insurgents, counterrevolutionaries. at September 26, 2021 03:12 PM (SchxB)

283 Be nice if there was a safe alternative to a kerosene heater. They usually stink.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 26, 2021 03:12 PM (1EKMc)

284 "Conceal outlet hose by burial, and direct outflow into a storm sewer, or even the sanitary sewer." Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon

Is that the point of a seepage pit, to slow storm runoff, to reduce street flooding or some such? ... I suppose that could make a little sense if everyone had to do it ... or just build the properly sized drainage system in the first place. ... enlarge as necessary.

One inch on 3000 sq feet of house footprint ... I get ~1869 gallons. 1000 gallon seepage pits seem a worthless imposition.

Posted by: illiniwek at September 26, 2021 03:23 PM (Cus5s)

285 Gutter solution? take the end cap off...if ya wanna get all McGuiver you could springload it with an old mouse trap or some such thing. Light rain will still flow down the spouts, hard/heavy excess will go out the end. Or Replace the end section with one several feet longer and do away with endcap/ downspouts all together, dump the water 3-4feet out. Self Cleaning too.
Wise old Roofer told me-"Ya cain't stop water son, ya can only steer it ta where it'll do the least harm"

Posted by: TJ Strong at September 26, 2021 03:46 PM (uAI4S)

286 There are some decent Mexican restaurants in the Gulf. I never tried one in Dubai but our favorite one in Bahrain was Senor Pacos. It was as good as a most Mexican places I've been to in the states (earned extra points for effort given location) plus they had Jerry singing on guitar every night. The whole place would be singing on American Pie and Country Roads.
Another good place in Bahrain is Rick's Country Kitchen. Great for next day hangover breakfast on a weekend trip to Bahrain from KSA. And yes they had pork on the menu. Dubai places probably do as well.

Posted by: Ken Grover at September 26, 2021 04:32 PM (bzks8)

287 Upgrading to a 5" gutter solved the problem for me at my house on the Outer Banks. Basically, one gutter had to handle rain from 3 roof lines, and the little gutter just overflowed and created a waterfall. The 5" seamless gutter (AND down spout), totally solved the problem. Then we had to deal with the washout at the bottom of the down spout with river rock stone.

Posted by: Liz953 at September 26, 2021 07:22 PM (jGOHJ)

288 A gutter guy can tell you how many square foot of roof a gutter can handle. Hint. none will handle the amount your talking about.
Using two drop spouts at the end will help a lot. its a quick cheap fix.

Posted by: iowan at September 26, 2021 07:59 PM (Ch0tO)

289 Are you traditional with Rye or does it matter?

Posted by: Big JiLm at September 26, 2021 10:08 PM (QnLni)

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