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First-World Problems...

smokeflaw.jpg

Well...shit. I booted our old alarm company when they refused to honor the service contract and repair or replace a door sensor that had failed. Apparently they interpreted the contract to mean that they would repair stuff only if it wasn't too old, and since the sensor was 17 years old and no longer made they figured it was my responsibility.

So we agreed to disagree. I canceled their service and hired another company, and they had a regional manager call and beg for the business. Unfortunately for them the new company had already identified three nonfunctional zones that the original company's vaunted systems had identified as working just perfectly. Oh...one of those simply didn't exist. It was listed in the system, but there was no sensor. That was nice to discover.

The new company also swapped the very old smoke detectors for new ones, but the boxes didn't line up perfectly, and now I am faced with a cataclysm of sheet-rock repair, something I do very, very, badly. Although since these are obviously on the ceiling I will run the delightful risk of getting the crap in my eyes, and that is always entertaining.

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 1st of 5

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:00 PM (2JoB8)

2 Afternoon.

Posted by: Robert *Be Ungovernable* - Iron Maiden, Senjutsu, OUT NOW!!! at September 19, 2021 01:03 PM (1Yy3c)

3 Ha!
Did the same thing with my alarm company a year ago. Cost was a wash and far superior sensors and coverage.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:03 PM (axyOa)

4 Been working on one, immigrants broke my 30 year old Jim Sam's blade guide and scrounging parts from my grandfather's collection jars from when I was a kid to repair it.
Found parts, just need to enlarge one side of the hole.

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:03 PM (2JoB8)

5 FlexSeal. Duh.

Posted by: Eromero at September 19, 2021 01:04 PM (0OP+5)

6 They make a cover for holes like this called "Ceiling Medallions"

Posted by: Beto Ochoa at September 19, 2021 01:04 PM (dzZCL)

7 Hola

Posted by: Thanatopsis at beautiful Chancre del Diablo ranch at September 19, 2021 01:04 PM (/K7bt)

8 I use toothpaste to touch up holes like that (and also for nail holes from hanging pictures). You may need to find some color matching touchup paint but thats easy.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:05 PM (axyOa)

9 OK, probably tooled steel, not drilling so easy

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:07 PM (2JoB8)

10 Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:05 PM (axyOa)

I think it's too big for toothpaste!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 19, 2021 01:07 PM (Q9lwr)

11 Get a paper plate and put it under the smoke detector. Or get a fancy plaster medallion to go around it. Gild if you like. The level of class is up to you.

Posted by: f'd at September 19, 2021 01:07 PM (Tnijr)

12 Caulk is your friend. And a little matching paint.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 19, 2021 01:08 PM (jvt6t)

13 CBD sparkling is so easy, do you need to actually fix a hole bigger than 2 inches?

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:08 PM (2JoB8)

14 Plaster is great for stuff like that. Press it in with a spackle knife, give it a wipe with the knife, and its cured in 5 minutes. Just make sure you trim the fur from the damaged edge with a razor knife first. You'll never see the repair.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at September 19, 2021 01:09 PM (VwHCD)

15 CBD sparkling? Oh my......

Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 19, 2021 01:09 PM (jvt6t)

16 "I am faced with a cataclysm of sheet-rock repair"

Just

Posted by: dri at September 19, 2021 01:09 PM (T8So0)

17 My 72 year old mother is getting a colonoscopy tomorrow and she's not particularly happy about the things she had to do to prep for it.

But I'm so torn. The terrible jokes care coming at me a mile a minute but on the other hand it is my mom and that makes it weird.

I'm an asshole still trying to be a halfway decent son and it's killing me.

Posted by: Robert *Be Ungovernable* - Iron Maiden, Senjutsu, OUT NOW!!! at September 19, 2021 01:09 PM (1Yy3c)

18 CBD, cut a beauty ring slightly larger than the smoke detector and put it up. You only really need to cover, not repair.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:10 PM (2SdPm)

19 A big fancy gold leafed medallion with Angels blowing trumpets would really make that smoke detector pop.

Posted by: f'd at September 19, 2021 01:10 PM (Tnijr)

20 do you need to actually fix a hole bigger than 2 inches?

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:08 PM (2JoB

Yes. This is a hard-wired smoke detector. It has a junction box whose screw holes didn't match up with the new smoke detector.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 19, 2021 01:10 PM (Q9lwr)

21 Smooth ceiling, piece of cake, now if were were talking popcorn ceilings...

Get some dry sheetrock mud (Easy Sand 20 mins is what I'm using right now), mix very stiff, apply with a cheap wide plastic putting knife.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at September 19, 2021 01:10 PM (OChGz)

22 Don't know when my house was wired for security, phone and cable but the attic looks like some telecommunications sub-station. A former city police chief owned it once so I blame him.

Posted by: Javems at September 19, 2021 01:10 PM (AmoqO)

23 I pulled out my camping table after 2 years and discovered that the neighbors tree was growing through the wall. She whined when I told here it was her responsibility ( zero lot line ) it's all fixed now, putting the shelves back up today and the stuff that goes on them. My wife bought two air purifiers, boxing and setting up today. Trimming. All kinds of things to be done.

Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 19, 2021 01:10 PM (WF/xn)

24 CBD sparkling is so easy, do you need to actually fix a hole bigger than 2 inches?
Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:08 PM (2JoB
-----------------------

CBD sparkles? Does he also sashay?

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:11 PM (2SdPm)

25 Joint compound. When it dries, it is easy to sand.

Posted by: JAS, AoSHQ addict at September 19, 2021 01:11 PM (xopIz)

26 "I am faced with a cataclysm of sheet-rock repair"

Just run a bead of white latex caulk around the smoke detector base and smooth it with your finger. Might take 30 seconds per unit.

Posted by: dri at September 19, 2021 01:11 PM (T8So0)

27 NBC's Chuck Todd On Biden's Multiple Crises: 'It's Been A Rough 6 Weeks' And 'It's Only Getting Worse'

-
I just don't understand. I mean, we're living in No Mean Tweets Utopia.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks aka Hangdog Barkston at September 19, 2021 01:12 PM (d9FiS)

28 Caulk is your friend. And a little matching paint.
Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 19, 2021 01:08 PM (jvt6t)

Cock is *my* friend. And matching edible underwear.

Posted by: Don Le Mon at September 19, 2021 01:12 PM (1Yy3c)

29 CBD sparkles? Does he also sashay?

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:11 PM (2SdPm)

Well, I mince, but that's for the Food Thread...

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 19, 2021 01:12 PM (Q9lwr)

30 Wet sand with one'a them 150 grit sanding sponges, wring often. 1/10th the dust.

Wear gargles.

Posted by: West at September 19, 2021 01:12 PM (QY+6a)

31 I gargle!

Posted by: Don Le Mon at September 19, 2021 01:13 PM (1Yy3c)

32 Cock is *my* friend. And matching edible underwear.
Posted by: Don Le Mon at September 19, 2021 01:12 PM (1Yy3c)

Never heard of that for sheet rock repair, but don't let me stop you.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 19, 2021 01:13 PM (jvt6t)

33 Just don't get gypped on your sheet-rock!

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 01:13 PM (UHVv4)

34 I'm looking at sheet rock work because I drilled dozens of holes in the wall in which to spray Premise Foam termite food.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 01:14 PM (UJBzp)

35 Termites _ Last week I started covering my upper deck with plastic panels. (cheap, yes - affective, yes).

In the process I knocked one of the 1x4 cedar bats off the siding, that was easy. Upon further inspection I discovered critters feasting upon my house.

Doing do diligence I decided that non-repellant poison is the way to go. I also discovered that in 1994 they treated the Statue of Liberty with the same stuff, hexaflumuron, a bait that can be purchased from Homely Depot for $50.00.

If you click the link there are picks of how bad the infestation was and exactly what they did.
What they didn't do was spend hundreds or thousands of dollars to rid themselves of the pests.

https://preview.tinyurl.com/yfvl37w5
https://www.ncptt.nps.gov/wp-content
/uploads/1999-11.pdf

Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 01:14 PM (UJBzp)

36 Smooth out the drywall and caulk it. Easy Peasy

Posted by: Robert W Smith at September 19, 2021 01:14 PM (q1aSU)

37 But I'm so torn. The terrible jokes care coming at me a mile a minute but on the other hand it is my mom and that makes it weird.

I'm an asshole still trying to be a halfway decent son and it's killing me.
-----------------------------
No shit, dude!

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 01:15 PM (UHVv4)

38 Caulk is your friend. And a little matching paint.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 19, 2021 01:08 PM


Yep.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 19, 2021 01:16 PM (JUOKG)

39 Just make sure you trim the fur
----------------------------
Especially with plaster of Paris.

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 01:16 PM (UHVv4)

40 It looks like you're going to have to replace your whole ceiling.

---- Hired Handiman.

Posted by: Justsayin' at September 19, 2021 01:17 PM (Fs5vw)

41 We started a significant home renovation back in mid-August. One of the stupidest things was when the electrician replaced the light over the kitchen sink. One, it was backwards so you saw the mounting hardware on the backside. Two, it wasn't centered over the sink. Three, the original box had to be abandoned in order to center the light so he just put a white plastic plate over it.

I will fix it myself when properly motivated or drunk.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 19, 2021 01:17 PM (BFigT)

42 By George...i think I've got it.

Teco Bell Nazis or TB Naz....if you will.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 19, 2021 01:17 PM (T1fV4)

43 Get a paper plate and put it under the smoke detector. Or get a fancy plaster medallion to go around it. Gild if you like. The level of class is up to you.
Posted by: f'd at September 19, 2021 01:07 PM (Tnijr)


That's totally something my dad would do. He was a bailing wire, silicone and duct tape king !

Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 19, 2021 01:17 PM (WF/xn)

44 35 I'll bite. Where does the Statue of Liberty have wooden parts? I haven't been there but it looks like all metal and concrete.

Posted by: jdgalt1 at September 19, 2021 01:17 PM (3SFo/)

45 Homey Depot, Lowes any other sell mesh patches around 6 inches square that stick over hole and skim coat overtop

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:17 PM (2JoB8)

46 CBD sparkling is so easy,
-----------------------------------
Just ask any modern vampire.

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 01:18 PM (UHVv4)

47 By the way, it always puzzled me the idea of ordinary household repairs were anything but ordinary.

For instance, I put a new, very basic, thermostat in Mom's house and a gal that was there remarked that it was amazing I could do that, etc. She was about my age, by the way.

I finally realized that, among my high school peer group, there probably wasn't a one of us that didn't know how to use basic tools, and, therefore, basic repair work was something we grew up around and helped dad with, which made it unremarkable.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:18 PM (2SdPm)

48 You could make a plate to go on the junction box to offset mount the detector.

Posted by: f'd at September 19, 2021 01:19 PM (Tnijr)

49 Go to Lowe's. They have patch materials specifically made for repairs like this.

Posted by: Justsayin' at September 19, 2021 01:19 PM (Fs5vw)

50 I had this happen with a chandelier stories up - instead I had the guys install a 'chandelier medallion' to cover the area. The smallest diameter one I have found is just shy of 10 inches in diameter on amazon.

Posted by: cfowife at September 19, 2021 01:20 PM (wjvds)

51 You can get away with just using some sheetrock for the patches; when its painted over nobody is going to know and its a lot cheaper and easier.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 19, 2021 01:20 PM (KZzsI)

52
I think it's too big for toothpaste!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 19, 2021 01:07 PM (Q9lwr)

Hmmm. I was going from the picture.
Caulking then.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:20 PM (axyOa)

53
I finally realized that, among my high school peer group, there probably wasn't a one of us that didn't know how to use basic tools, and, therefore, basic repair work was something we grew up around and helped dad with, which made it unremarkable.
Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:18 PM (2SdPm)

My wife and her friends always say, where did you learn to do that ? Cracks me up. I say "growing up poor is a priceless education"

Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 19, 2021 01:20 PM (WF/xn)

54
I'm an asshole still trying to be a halfway decent son and it's killing me.
-----------------------------
No shit, dude!
Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 01:15 PM (UHVv4)

________

It'll all come out in the end.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 19, 2021 01:20 PM (/U27+)

55 My tablet, and insun, doest know spackling

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:20 PM (2JoB8)

56 Sorry, DRYWALL not sheetrock.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 19, 2021 01:21 PM (KZzsI)

57 Fuck Chuck Todd and all the rest of the "now you tell us" MSM.

Posted by: Too Bad Costa Rica Sucks at September 19, 2021 01:21 PM (oWBc3)

58 @ 6 They make a cover for holes like this called "Ceiling Medallions"

____________________

They make 'em in whole discs or in two-part discs, and the two-part discs can be hit up with a li'l spackle or putty and painted if that's the easier way to do it . . .

Posted by: Dr_No at September 19, 2021 01:21 PM (mu5GU)

59 Instead of "repairing" the sheetrock, just get yourself a flat circular disc and place that between the sensor and the damaged sheetrock. If you do it properly, it will look like it belongs there.

Posted by: DaveK at September 19, 2021 01:21 PM (M0w9w)

60 Just don't get gypped on your sheet-rock!
Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 01:13 PM (UHVv4)

Annd once you've painted, you can sit back, admire the work, and get plastered!

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:22 PM (axyOa)

61 Hang pictures anywhere.

Ceilings...if you will.

Cover the mistakes. Like china putting dead bodies in The Great Wall. The Middle Kingdom if you will.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 19, 2021 01:22 PM (T1fV4)

62 It only needs to move an inch or so. I would figure out how to remount it so it covers the hole.

Posted by: f'd at September 19, 2021 01:22 PM (Tnijr)

63 Would have never guess steel this hard, jig saw is Bosch and over 30 years old

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:23 PM (2JoB8)

64 I was switching insurances for the house years ago. They asked whether I had a security system. I laughed and said it was called "Nosy Neighbors with Guns." Some of my neighbors have installed cameras in recent years. Zero issues for me. I'd have to go big with a closed system at this point, since I trust no one.

And ceiling drywall work is definitely rough. Especially when you find out you need to cut 6 sq ft of drywall out of the ceiling AFTER having more cellulose insulation blown in. Thank God the insulation basically cut my heating bill in half, paying for itself in four years.

Posted by: Catherine--who generally doesn't curse. at September 19, 2021 01:24 PM (c8cE2)

65 The visible part of the Statue of Liberty is copper.
The important part of the story is that the termite infestation was eliminated with the use of bait.

People pay thousands of dollars to rid their homes of termites. Some exterminators will tell you they must tent your whole house.

This experiment at the Statue validates that all of that is unnecessary. All one must do is properly use the inexpensive bait.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 01:25 PM (UJBzp)

66 60 Just don't get gypped on your sheet-rock!
Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 01:13 PM (UHVv4)

Annd once you've painted, you can sit back, admire the work, and get plastered!
Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:22 PM (axyOa)

Yup. And after that you can nail the ol' lady.

Posted by: Justsayin' at September 19, 2021 01:25 PM (Fs5vw)

67 Protip on sensors: dust them off from time to time and avoid the 3AM buzzing.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:25 PM (axyOa)

68 Drywall and sheetrock are same thing

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:25 PM (2JoB8)

69 Would have never guess steel this hard, jig saw is Bosch and over 30 years old
--------------------
Remember that, Skip, in case you're ever a Forged in Fire contestant.

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 01:25 PM (UHVv4)

70 If you need to fix a bigger hole in sheet rock wad up some old newspaper and stick in the hole. Then plaster over it with the caulking compound or spackle, then sand it smooth an paint it to match the wall.

Posted by: Vic at September 19, 2021 01:26 PM (mpXpK)

71 "It's been a rough six weeks"

It's axiomatic on the left, that bad things just happen, apparently these incidents just fall out of the sky. There is never a relationship to be recognized that any normal person would attribute. Cause and Effect. How do it work? See also: Monetary Inflation. They will go through extraordinary mental gymnastics to try to 'splain to the rubes why a pound of burger just doubled in price.

I hear they are in the "blame profiteers" stage.

Posted by: Common Tater at September 19, 2021 01:26 PM (gBShP)

72 Actually studies have statistically shown that an ACTUAL alarm is not a greater deterrent than a large sign that says 'PROPERTY PROTECTED BY ALARM'.

Posted by: DudeAbiding at September 19, 2021 01:27 PM (setIA)

73 Buy a bigger sensor.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 19, 2021 01:27 PM (BFigT)

74 Actually studies have statistically shown that an ACTUAL alarm is not a greater deterrent than a large sign that says 'PROPERTY PROTECTED BY ALARM'.
----------------------
Fire can read??

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 01:28 PM (UHVv4)

75 Actually studies have statistically shown that an ACTUAL alarm is not a greater deterrent than a large sign that says 'PROPERTY PROTECTED BY ALARM'.
Posted by: DudeAbiding at September 19, 2021 01:27 PM (setIA)
------------

We've got 150 lbs of alarms with teeth. And perimeter cameras with backup power.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:28 PM (2SdPm)

76 Buy a bigger sensor.
Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 19, 2021 01:27 PM (BFigT)

Thread winner.
Only took 73 commwnts.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:29 PM (axyOa)

77
We've got 150 lbs of alarms with teeth.

__________

Ours would be asking the intruders, "Got a treat?"

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 19, 2021 01:30 PM (/U27+)

78 Good FBI-J6 Rally meme a la Scooby-Doo:
https://tinyurl.com/4yuwmh5x

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 01:30 PM (UHVv4)

79 Ours would be asking the intruders, "Got a treat?"
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 19, 2021 01:30 PM (/U27+)
---------------

Yeah, no, uninvited strangers are not welcome in our house.

Heck, we have to sequester the pooches when the A/C guy comes over to service the unit.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:32 PM (2SdPm)

80 Hang pictures anywhere.

Great idea. Hang a large print of naked ottoman man on the wall near the detector. Your guests will never notice the sheet rock.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 19, 2021 01:33 PM (jvt6t)

81 65 This experiment at the Statue validates that all of that is unnecessary. All one must do is properly use the inexpensive bait.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 01:25 PM (UJBzp)


I used to get Andro to bait my yard with to get rid of fire ants and other bugs. I found that the local supply store had some cheaper stuff that was just as good. That is what I use now and it gets rid of all the ants and bugs in the yard.

Posted by: Vic at September 19, 2021 01:33 PM (mpXpK)

82 Like to trade a fistful of bitcoins for q few dollars more before the EMP hits.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 19, 2021 01:33 PM (T1fV4)

83 CBD sparkles? Does he also sashay?
Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:11 PM (2SdPm)
-----------

Only when he wears his Crocs.

Posted by: bluebell at September 19, 2021 01:33 PM (wyw4S)

84 70 If you need to fix a bigger hole in sheet rock wad up some old newspaper and stick in the hole. Then plaster over it with the caulking compound or spackle, then sand it smooth an paint it to match the wall.

Posted by: Vic at September 19, 2021 01:26 PM (mpXpK)
------------------

Worked clean up for a home builder in high school.
Etched in memory is painters stuffing rags into wrong holes the cabinet makers created.

They would stuff rags, newspaper, shavings, anything for filler before doing the final patch and finish.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 01:34 PM (UJBzp)

85 By dollars...i mean ammunition.

I am goof.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 19, 2021 01:34 PM (T1fV4)

86 The Statue of Liberty in New York harbor was constructed of copper over an iron frame iirc. The inherent problem there is one of Galvanic corrosion. Iron and copper aren't too far off each other on the noble chart of reactivity, but they do set up a weak electric current with each other in the presence of an electrolyte. Like say, sea air (salt water).

I think the renovation in the 1980s set about addressing this problem by isolating these two metals electrically.

Basically any battery is based on a couple different elements corroding against each other. Carbon and Zinc "D" cells. The Apollo spacecraft were filled with several hundred pounds of Silver-Zinc, which must have cost a fortune.

Posted by: Common Tater at September 19, 2021 01:36 PM (gBShP)

87 Only when he wears his Crocs.

Posted by: bluebell at September 19, 2021 01:33 PM (wyw4S)
----------

CBD is out of the closet with his Crocs?

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:37 PM (2SdPm)

88 I had this happen with a chandelier stories up - instead I had the guys install a 'chandelier medallion' to cover the area. The smallest diameter one I have found is just shy of 10 inches in diameter on amazon.

Posted by: cfowife at September 19, 2021 01:20 PM


Did the same thing when we were selling our house in CT. I was not going to spend the money on replacing the old broken down one, we did what they called the decorative plate thing. Took the 40 year old ceiling fan out of the living room too and replaced it with a simple LED fixture.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 19, 2021 01:38 PM (JUOKG)

89 If you can get a piece of drywall 4 inches about bigger than hole in width and height
On back side score drywall 1/4 to 1/2 inch smaller than opening in width and height
Break off drywall but tearing it free from face so it stays on your piece.
Try it to see if drywall fits opening and paper face is bigger than opening.
On back side put generous amount of spackle filling the drywall missing from face.
Press in hole slowly pushing out excess spackle until flat.
Let dry and coat over top.

I can fix a electrical box like this with heat gun 15 minutes from hole to paint time, 3 coats

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:38 PM (2JoB8)

90 They would stuff rags, newspaper, shavings, anything for filler before doing the final patch and finish.
Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 01:34 PM (UJBzp)
-------------

Ran into that when we had our shower redone. Paper towels were sticking out of the sheetrock behind the wall.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:38 PM (2SdPm)

91 Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 01:34 PM (UJBzp)

I've rebuilt fireboxes with a case of empties behind the box

Posted by: REDACTED at September 19, 2021 01:39 PM (uCLWI)

92 I am goof.

I am Groot.

Posted by: Groot at September 19, 2021 01:39 PM (jvt6t)

93 Just had all the sliders and windows replaced. The rebar in the slab was dissolving the aluminum frames. Went with vinyl this time. 18k to do the whole house, we have 5 sliding glass doors.

Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 19, 2021 01:40 PM (WF/xn)

94 My First World Problem

The neutron generator I use produces the typical burst of neutrons, fragments of atomic nuclei, and that seems to work fine. But because it uses short-lived tritium, it must be replaced regularly. So the problem is how can I keep my nukes reliable? Is there a good workaround?

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:40 PM (axyOa)

95 Like to trade a fistful of bitcoins for q few dollars more before the EMP hits.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 19, 2021 01:33 PM (T1fV4)

I had to pay with a 1939 quarter I carried around the other day. I was pissed about it but the situations happen when you pay with cash and carry around such things. I was cool enough to implore the guy to switch out that coin for his own,don't give the bastards something they don't deserve.*

* a 1939 quarter has a melt value of $4 and you probably have to pay $8 to buy one.

Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 01:40 PM (Ks/+3)

96 The goggles, they do nothzing!

Posted by: Radioactive Man at September 19, 2021 01:41 PM (PiwSw)

97 The neutron generator I use produces the typical burst of neutrons, fragments of atomic nuclei, and that seems to work fine. But because it uses short-lived tritium, it must be replaced regularly. So the problem is how can I keep my nukes reliable? Is there a good workaround?
Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:40 PM (axyOa)
-------------

dilithium crystals?

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:41 PM (2SdPm)

98 CBD is out of the closet with his Crocs?
Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:37 PM (2SdPm)
----------

Go ahead and ask him.

Posted by: bluebell at September 19, 2021 01:41 PM (wyw4S)

99
We have two fluorescent fixtures in the kitchen. I hate them. I replaced the bulbs with LED tubes, but one of the damned things still won't work. Why isn't there a ballast that's easy to replace?

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 19, 2021 01:42 PM (/U27+)

100 94 My First World Problem

The neutron generator I use produces the typical burst of neutrons, fragments of atomic nuclei, and that seems to work fine. But because it uses short-lived tritium, it must be replaced regularly. So the problem is how can I keep my nukes reliable? Is there a good workaround?
Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:40 PM (axyOa)


Bitte schoen:

https://is.gd/O4hVl1

Posted by: Radioactive Man at September 19, 2021 01:42 PM (PiwSw)

101 CBD I have a similar situation with a newly installed thermostat on the wall. They put a plastic panel around it, that does not match my paint, but the new panel did not cover paint mismatch from where the original thermostat was. I am thinking about finding a thin rectangular piece of plastic/metal/kydex that will hide the problems. Instead of probably having to repaint the whole wall panel. In your case, it would go between the detector and the ceiling.

Posted by: MikeM at September 19, 2021 01:43 PM (xbR8Y)

102 Is there a good workaround?
Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:40 PM (axyOa)
-------------

dilithium crystals?
Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:41 PM (2SdPm)

PU-49 Space Fuel Modulatorrrrrr

Posted by: Marvin, the Martian at September 19, 2021 01:43 PM (oHd/0)

103 Go ahead and ask him.
Posted by: bluebell at September 19, 2021 01:41 PM (wyw4S)
-------------

Hmmmm, no...I think not. I'm pretty sure I've pushed my luck far enough.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:43 PM (2SdPm)

104 The neutron generator I use produces the typical burst of neutrons, fragments of atomic nuclei, and that seems to work fine. But because it uses short-lived tritium, it must be replaced regularly. So the problem is how can I keep my nukes reliable? Is there a good workaround?
Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:40 PM (axyOa)

My God man! I'm a doctor not a nuclear physicist!

Posted by: Zombie Bones McCoy at September 19, 2021 01:43 PM (jvt6t)

105 93 Just had all the sliders and windows replaced. The rebar in the slab was dissolving the aluminum frames. Went with vinyl this time. 18k to do the whole house, we have 5 sliding glass doors.
Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 19, 2021 01:40 PM (WF/xn)

seems purty reasonable

I have a 3 section Pella architect seires slider in my pool room

don't ask me how much it was

Posted by: REDACTED at September 19, 2021 01:43 PM (uCLWI)

106
So the problem is how can I keep my nukes reliable? Is there a good workaround?
Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:40 PM (axyOa)

_________

Try inverse phasing.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 19, 2021 01:44 PM (/U27+)

107 Boy that was a lot of words for a mess. Basically install a thin plastic square between your detector and the ceiling.

Posted by: MikeM at September 19, 2021 01:44 PM (xbR8Y)

108 104 The neutron generator I use produces the typical burst of neutrons, fragments of atomic nuclei, and that seems to work fine. But because it uses short-lived tritium, it must be replaced regularly. So the problem is how can I keep my nukes reliable? Is there a good workaround?
Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:40 PM (axyOa)

want

want bad

Posted by: REDACTED at September 19, 2021 01:44 PM (uCLWI)

109 My first job out of school, tech support for ADT installation. Walked install contractor s through installation problems. Remotely programmed fire\security panels. Horrible job. It tried every nerve i had. You would be surprised by the shit we saw and corrected. ADT is a overpriced under performance product. Get a dog. Buy a gun. Get better locks. Cops only get there in minutes and clean up. Fire and smoke\co detectors are life saving. Flood and freeze detection saves bucks.

Posted by: USNtakim deplorable still. at September 19, 2021 01:45 PM (0OmEj)

110 Had a FWP couple of months ago after replacing commodes in 2 bathrooms. They rooms were painted in decorative styles. One had a leather appearance and the other a denim look. Unfortunately, the paint did not go behind old fixtures.

Not wanting to repaint the both rooms I used tin ceiling tiles to put behind the new commodes. Looked great. Problem solved.

Posted by: olddog in mo, Pontoon Captain* (like a real captain, only drunker) at September 19, 2021 01:45 PM (ju2Fy)

111 seems purty reasonable

I have a 3 section Pella architect seires slider in my pool room

don't ask me how much it was



Pella us nice.

I wasn't too wounded by the price. Happy with the result. Went with Milguard as is is a local comp,y here.

Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 19, 2021 01:46 PM (WF/xn)

112 They make a cover for holes like this called "Ceiling Medallions"
Posted by: Beto Ochoa at September 19, 2021 01:04 PM (dzZCL)



FUN FACT: You'll find three Ceiling Medallions on General Milley's extravagantly-decorated chest, along with an Iron Cross, Third Class, a blue ribbon for livestock from the Kansas State Fair and a Boy Scout merit badge for motorboat safety.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 19, 2021 01:47 PM (guGkK)

113
don't ask me how much it was

Posted by: REDACTED at September 19, 2021 01:43 PM


how much was it?

Posted by: AltonJackson at September 19, 2021 01:47 PM (DUIap)

114 Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:40 PM (axyOa)

I thought I was having problems getting a new ECM pod for my F-15C.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 19, 2021 01:47 PM (jvt6t)

115 My first job out of school, tech support for ADT installation. Walked install contractor s through installation problems. Remotely programmed fire\security panels. Horrible job. It tried every nerve i had. You would be surprised by the shit we saw and corrected. ADT is a overpriced under performance product. Get a dog. Buy a gun. Get better locks. Cops only get there in minutes and clean up. Fire and smoke\co detectors are life saving. Flood and freeze detection saves bucks.
Posted by: USNtakim deplorable still. at September 19, 2021 01:45 PM (0OmEj)
-------------------

The school system I worked for, I was in the ceiling, pulling cable at a new facility and the birds nest of wiring the alarm company had created was unreal. I couldn't believe someone had signed off on that mess.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:47 PM (2SdPm)

116
Buy a gun.

_________

I would, but Her Majesty would likely use it on me first.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 19, 2021 01:48 PM (/U27+)

117 They smoke detector company will have a Trim Ring for that.

Posted by: Aurlieus at September 19, 2021 01:48 PM (pPbjZ)

118 sequence is important.

Buy a new wife THEN buy a gun

Posted by: Kindltot at September 19, 2021 01:49 PM (ssx3L)

119 I see I'm too late for the toothpaste suggestion.

How about halvah?

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Live! from the Dungeon of Discord at September 19, 2021 01:49 PM (Dc2NZ)

120 We have two fluorescent fixtures in the kitchen. I hate them. I replaced the bulbs with LED tubes, but one of the damned things still won't work. Why isn't there a ballast that's easy to replace?

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 19, 2021 01:42 PM (/U27+)

take him for ballast chief.

I like fluorescent, particularly in the kitchen. I have had bad experiences with bulbs. It is probably because most of my fixtures could be on Social Security. I go with the old school bulbs and they do as well as the fancy ones. I haven't noticed even a lick of correlation between cost and longevity with bulbs. The long fluorescent tubes last a long time inmo.

Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 01:49 PM (Ks/+3)

121 Buy a bigger sensor.
Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 19, 2021 01:27 PM (BFigT)



THIS.

Posted by: Chief Brody at September 19, 2021 01:50 PM (guGkK)

122 how much was it?
Posted by: AltonJackson at September 19, 2021 01:47 PM (DUIap)

a couple of nunyas

Posted by: REDACTED at September 19, 2021 01:50 PM (uCLWI)

123 Buy a gun.

_________

I would, but Her Majesty would likely use it on me first.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 19, 2021 01:48 PM (/U27+)

I think i was eight when I didn't own a gun.Maybe I was nine.

Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 01:51 PM (Ks/+3)

124 I see I'm too late for the toothpaste suggestion.

How about halvah?
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Live! from the Dungeon of Discord at September 19, 2021 01:49 PM (Dc2NZ)


Like Tritium, the halvah life isn't very long

Posted by: Kindltot at September 19, 2021 01:51 PM (ssx3L)

125 Hi........... i am from the US Government and we can fix that really easily !!!!

Posted by: James at September 19, 2021 01:51 PM (24+Vp)

126 I see I'm too late for the toothpaste suggestion.

How about halvah?
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Live! from the Dungeon of Discord at September 19, 2021 01:49 PM (Dc2NZ)


Hummus > halvah

Hummus comes in an array of designer colors.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 19, 2021 01:52 PM (guGkK)

127 I can fix a electrical box like this with heat gun 15 minutes from hole to paint time, 3 coats

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:38 PM (2JoB

You fix them and I'll cook dinner.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 19, 2021 01:52 PM (Q9lwr)

128 I thought I was having problems getting a new ECM pod for my F-15C.
Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 19, 2021 01:47 PM (jvt6t)

JCWhitney.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 01:52 PM (axyOa)

129 Went with Milguard as is is a local comp,y here.
Posted by: Hatari

Milguard makes *great* replacements. We did 23 in our last house (all windows were single pane) in 1999 and had nary a problem through the sale last March.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at September 19, 2021 01:52 PM (OChGz)

130 Milguard makes *great* replacements. We did 23 in our last house (all windows were single pane) in 1999 and had nary a problem through the sale last March.
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at September 19, 2021 01:52 PM (OChGz)

Good to know !

Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 19, 2021 01:53 PM (WF/xn)

131 I can fix a electrical box like this with heat gun 15 minutes from hole to paint time, 3 coats

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 01:38 PM (2JoB




Three coats? Ptui!

Posted by: A. Schicklegruber at September 19, 2021 01:53 PM (guGkK)

132 The cost of the new fixtures to switch out the fluorescent to LED tubes may be worth the hassle.

I am not sure a ballast is needed.

(I love the flexibility LEDs give to lighting, if you want you can time the whole thing to mimic the sky, or a perfect day if you prefer. When I remodel the kitchen . . . )

Posted by: Kindltot at September 19, 2021 01:53 PM (ssx3L)

133 I have first world problems too! My Mustang overheated on me the other day. I replaced the fan on it a couple of years ago and when I did I noticed one of the contacts on the plug (the one to ground) was melted, and it looks like it is not making good contact any more. I ran another ground wire and now it works. I have also ordered a new plug, and I'll put it in when it gets here, but I'll leave my auxiliary ground in place as well.

I wish the Subaru would be that easy to fix.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 01:54 PM (CcOog)

134 I hate it when the battery is low in one of the smoke detectors and you get that shrill piercing sound that won't stop until you end up having to change every single battery out on every smoke detector in the house.

Posted by: redridinghood at September 19, 2021 01:54 PM (NpAcC)

135
(I love the flexibility LEDs give to lighting, if you want you can time the whole thing to mimic the sky, or a perfect day if you prefer. When I remodel the kitchen . . . )



I put 3 LED bars in the garage. 79 bucks each. Very happy with the, really bright

Posted by: Hatari Somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 19, 2021 01:54 PM (WF/xn)

136 The Biden administration will expel some of the thousands of Haitian migrants who have been crossing the U.S. border illegally in Del Rio, Texas, placing them on planes heading back to Haiti, the Department of Homeland Security announced Saturday.

Isn't this racist against persons of color?? Where is the CRT folks when you need them......

Posted by: James at September 19, 2021 01:55 PM (24+Vp)

137 I wish the Subaru would be that easy to fix.
Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 01:54 PM (CcOog)
------------

A lack of after market parts makes working on Subaru's very expensive.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:55 PM (2SdPm)

138
You fix them and I'll cook dinner.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

Barter food thread!

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at September 19, 2021 01:55 PM (OChGz)

139 There was a comedy bit on the radio some years ago. It was for "A Big Black Guy Named Ben Car Alarm". Whenever some bastard tried to steal your car, Ben would get out of his lawn chair, as he would sit next to your car, and tell the would be thief..."Get away from the car Muthafucker!".

Testimonials too.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at September 19, 2021 01:55 PM (R/m4+)

140 138
You fix them and I'll cook dinner.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

Barter food thread!
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at September 19, 2021 01:55 PM (OChGz)

First World prepping!

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Live! from the Dungeon of Discord at September 19, 2021 01:56 PM (Dc2NZ)

141 Isn't this racist against persons of color?? Where is the CRT folks when you need them......

The Texas Republican Party was having a voter registration drive that was too successful.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 19, 2021 01:56 PM (jvt6t)

142 Wired security systems were going out of relevance by 1995. Wireless sensors were getting good enough then. By now wireless sensors are the only way. Back then cellular backup connections were only for high dollar situations. Today there are many options used before traditional hardwire landline phone connections. Internet communication is more reliable than landlines.

Posted by: USNtakim deplorable still. at September 19, 2021 01:57 PM (0OmEj)

143 My FWP: my steak was too big to eat in one sitting.

Now I'll have to have steak for leftovers.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Live! from the Dungeon of Discord at September 19, 2021 01:57 PM (Dc2NZ)

144 139 There was a comedy bit on the radio some years ago. It was for "A Big Black Guy Named Ben Car Alarm". Whenever some bastard tried to steal your car, Ben would get out of his lawn chair, as he would sit next to your car, and tell the would be thief..."Get away from the car Muthafucker!".

Testimonials too.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at September 19, 2021 01:55 PM (R/m4+)


I think Eddie Murphy did a similar skit, riffing on the pleasant "your lights are on" voice. "Hey, somebody tryin' to steal yo batt'ry!"

Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, the Housekeeper at September 19, 2021 01:58 PM (PiwSw)

145 You fix them and I'll cook dinner.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

and our cut is ??

Posted by: IRS at September 19, 2021 01:58 PM (uCLWI)

146 Internet communication is more reliable than landlines. Posted by: USNtakim deplorable still. at September 19, 2021 01:57 PM (0OmEj)

Except when the power is out. Landlines still work, but internet doesn't.

Posted by: Caesar North of the Rubicon at September 19, 2021 01:58 PM (BMmaB)

147 The cost of the new fixtures to switch out the fluorescent to LED tubes may be worth the hassle.

Last week I replaced all the old fluorescent fixtures in the finished basement with LEDs. Better color light and much lighter (HA! Get it?)

Was I did uncover was a cluster of switched legs, hot legs capped off and abandoned conductor. It took me longer to clean that all up than to mount the new fixtures.

All is now ready for me to pull up the old carpet and have the new LVT put down.

Posted by: Tonypete at September 19, 2021 01:58 PM (mD/uy)

148 My FWP: my steak was too big to eat in one sitting.

Now I'll have to have steak for leftovers.
Posted by: All Hail Eris,

You poor dear, how traumatic!

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at September 19, 2021 01:58 PM (OChGz)

149 Posted by: USNtakim deplorable still. at September 19, 2021 01:57 PM (0OmEj)

All of the new ones are wireless, but I didn't want to swap out everything at once. As the wired ones fail I will replace with wireless.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 19, 2021 01:59 PM (Q9lwr)

150
I thought "slap a hot iron to it" was the stock answer for home repairs.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 19, 2021 01:59 PM (/U27+)

151 Alarm monitoring companies charge 40+ per month, but they farm out the monitoring for about 1 to 2 bucks per account. I'm well acquainted with how they work.

Posted by: AshevilleRobert at September 19, 2021 02:00 PM (HBlzO)

152
I thought "slap a hot iron to it" was the stock answer for home repairs.
Posted by: Hadrian

It has to be thrown into the Sous vide first.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at September 19, 2021 02:01 PM (OChGz)

153 but they farm out the monitoring for about 1 to 2 bucks per account

May I help you?

Posted by: Prakesh in India at September 19, 2021 02:01 PM (Xrfse)

154 Alarm monitoring companies charge 40+ per month, but they farm out the monitoring for about 1 to 2 bucks per account. I'm well acquainted with how they work.
Posted by: AshevilleRobert at September 19, 2021 02:00 PM (HBlzO)


So "immediate armed response" means some guy hops on a plane in Bangalore?

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at September 19, 2021 02:01 PM (guGkK)

155
Some sad news. The Yankees are losing 6-1 while Boston and Toronto are ahead. Should that continue, New York will be a game and a half out of a wild card spot.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 19, 2021 02:02 PM (/U27+)

156 Paris, France PRO vaxx and vaxx passport rally attended by dozens despite one-month of planning!

https://twitter.com/TheMarieOakes/status/
1439590446607572992

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 02:02 PM (UHVv4)

157 PIR-activated claymores, done. Oh and good legal counsel.

Posted by: rhomboid at September 19, 2021 02:02 PM (OTzUX)

158 Now I'll have to have steak for leftovers.
Posted by: All Hail Eris,

Steak n eggs for breakfast. Problem solved.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 19, 2021 02:02 PM (jvt6t)

159 >>> 143 My FWP: my steak was too big to eat in one sitting.

Now I'll have to have steak for leftovers.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Live! from the Dungeon of Discord at September 19, 2021 01:57 PM (Dc2NZ)

If you lived next to hogmartin you could have steak and eggs for breakfast.

....or not, since his chickens are still freeloading. ;p

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at September 19, 2021 02:03 PM (ACi07)

160 If this is an emergency, please order curry.

Posted by: Prakesh in India at September 19, 2021 02:03 PM (Xrfse)

161 Horde mind activated

Posted by: Jak Sucio at September 19, 2021 02:03 PM (jvt6t)

162 If you lived next to hogmartin you could have steak and eggs for breakfast.

....or not, since his chickens are still freeloading. ;p
Posted by: Helena Handbasket at September 19, 2021 02:03 PM (ACi07)
-------------

Chicken and waffles, then.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 02:03 PM (2SdPm)

163 Games out? Who cares, howz their commitment to racial justice?

Posted by: rhomboid at September 19, 2021 02:03 PM (OTzUX)

164 The Apollo spacecraft were filled with several hundred pounds of Silver-Zinc, which must have cost a fortune. Posted by: Common Tater at September 19, 2021 01:36 PM (gBShP)

Compared to the cost of everything else? Like the gold foil on the lunar lander?

Posted by: Caesar North of the Rubicon at September 19, 2021 02:04 PM (BMmaB)

165 May I help you?
Posted by: Prakesh 'Steve' in India

fify

Posted by: Tonypete at September 19, 2021 02:04 PM (mD/uy)

166 My alarm system contacts me directly. No middleman. Not a particularly user friendly system but ive spent 40 years in tech.

Posted by: BluesFish at September 19, 2021 02:05 PM (kPJ/p)

167 I finally realized that, among my high school peer group, there probably wasn't a one of us that didn't know how to use basic tools, and, therefore, basic repair work was something we grew up around and helped dad with, which made it unremarkable.
Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:18 PM (2SdPm)

Our daughter needed to adjust a bike seat on a PR documentary shoot. She walked down the street, found some guys in their garage, borrowed a wrench, fixed the bike and returned the wrench.
The New York camera guys were amazed.

Posted by: sal at September 19, 2021 02:05 PM (3c1fY)

168 Ahem. May I help you?

Posted by: Steve in India at September 19, 2021 02:05 PM (Xrfse)

169 Although since these are obviously on the ceiling I will run the delightful risk of getting the crap in my eyes, and that is always entertaining.

==
Goggles

Posted by: vmom stabby stabby stabby stabamillion (oEn12) at September 19, 2021 02:05 PM (oEn12)

170 IRS you bring the wine, that's your cut

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 02:06 PM (2JoB8)

171 " My alarm system contacts me directly. No middleman. Not a particularly user friendly system but ive spent 40 years in tech.

Posted by: BluesFish"

So, you have a dog then?

Posted by: AshevilleRobert at September 19, 2021 02:07 PM (HBlzO)

172 155
Some sad news. The Yankees are losing 6-1 while Boston and Toronto are ahead. Should that continue, New York will be a game and a half out of a wild card spot.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September

I fail to see how that is sad news.

Posted by: nurse ratched at September 19, 2021 02:07 PM (U2p+3)

173 The Yankees are losing 6-1 while Boston and Toronto are ahead. Should that continue, New York will be a game and a half out of a wild card spot.
----------------------------
Screw that! I'm watching the Chennai Super Kings take on the Mumbai Indians in Indian Premier League cricket! Although I do wish Mumbai would change their racist team name.

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 02:08 PM (UHVv4)

174
We are sorry you are having an intruder. Due to high call volume, notifying the police may be delayed. Please continue to hold.

*crappy music starts*

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at September 19, 2021 02:08 PM (/U27+)

175 >>>It was for "A Big Black Guy Named Ben Car Alarm".
----------

Working late in a not up and coming location stopped at a chicken shack.

Walked in the door and at the far corner of the room was a big, old, black man, leaning back in his chair with a shot gun across his lap.

The only dangerous time was between your car and the entrance door.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 02:08 PM (UJBzp)

176 Install a nice flashing and be done with it

Posted by: San Franpsycho at September 19, 2021 02:10 PM (EZebt)

177 Posted by: AshevilleRobert at September 19, 2021 02:07 PM (HBlzO)
----
The big ass black lab is the second line of defense. If you get past her without blood loss, well...

Posted by: BluesFish at September 19, 2021 02:10 PM (kPJ/p)

178 A lack of after market parts makes working on Subaru's very expensive.
Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:55 PM (2SdPm)


Yes, they are very proud of their parts. Idle air control, $535, said price being quoted to me without even a modicum of shame. (25 bucks on Ebay, good thing because that turned out to not fix the problem).

My little scoobytruck needs bearings in the trans, in 5th gear it really kicks up a fuss. Since the 5th gears are outside the case end, it's the end bearings. Not an extremely difficult fix, just time consuming.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 02:10 PM (CcOog)

179 Paris, France PRO vaxx and vaxx passport rally attended by dozens despite one-month of planning!

https://twitter.com/TheMarieOakes/status/
1439590446607572992

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at September 19, 2021 02:02 PM (UHVv4)

the French own protests. I don't see how anyone can see it any other way if they know the history. The key point of a protest, is to go against what people are planning. This failure makes a lot of sense really.

Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 02:10 PM (Ks/+3)

180 Well yes, they must have cost a fortune (on top of the regular customary fortune) associated with anything signed off as flight worthy for manned missions around the Moon. They had some problems with fuel cells and other stuff, but the good ole reliable DC batteries saved their ass more than once.

Posted by: Common Tater at September 19, 2021 02:11 PM (gBShP)

181 Home security system companies have tried to hold customers by claiming that your contract must be canceled in writing by a certain date or it auto renews, you can't just call them and say you are done at the end of their current contract, which they try and suggest is in perpetuity unless you go through a dozen hoops....unfortunately for them this has never held up in court. And they know it.

You saw this a lot in other scams like TV and Internet Service Providers in the 90's and Time Shares Unit sales guys...if you call any of these service providers and cancel on the phone, refuse to pay their bill after the contract date - just let them go to collections. They never do and just let it go...

Posted by: Boswell at September 19, 2021 02:11 PM (5iUNf)

182 All our kitchen lighting is now LED. 6 under cabinet and the dicked up one over the sink. The under cabinet ones are dimmable. New stainless steel topped island for food prep too. It's a bitch to keep clean.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 19, 2021 02:11 PM (BFigT)

183 Our daughter needed to adjust a bike seat on a PR documentary shoot. She walked down the street, found some guys in their garage, borrowed a wrench, fixed the bike and returned the wrench.
The New York camera guys were amazed.
Posted by: sal at September 19, 2021 02:05 PM (3c1fY)
-----------------

Hah, sounds like something my daughter would do.

Very cool.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 02:11 PM (2SdPm)

184 Working late in a not up and coming location stopped at a chicken shack.

Walked in the door and at the far corner of the room was a big, old, black man, leaning back in his chair with a shot gun across his lap.

The only dangerous time was between your car and the entrance door.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 02:08 PM

You must have been at the Williams chicken place in Dallas over by the VA.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 19, 2021 02:11 PM (JUOKG)

185 Found a bolt small enough for existing hole and a concave bearing not much different than original in my grandfather's collection. The Great Deppression generation must not have thrown out much if it had a use later.

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 02:12 PM (2JoB8)

186 But I'm so torn. The terrible jokes care coming at me a mile a minute but on the other hand it is my mom and that makes it weird.
-------------------

C'mon. You're owed one Mt. St. Helens joke.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:13 PM (YqDXo)

187 Monitoring alarms is a racket. False alarms are so common many agencies will not respond to anything other than panic buttons medical alerts and fire\smoke alarms. The triggered siren might be better than the alarm response. The lawn sign works too. Many people prefer that a security alarm contact them personally.

Posted by: USNtakim deplorable still. at September 19, 2021 02:15 PM (0OmEj)

188 It's difficult to throw anything of functional value away. Still have my 286.

Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 02:15 PM (UJBzp)

189 I finally realized that, among my high school peer group, there probably wasn't a one of us that didn't know how to use basic tools, and, therefore, basic repair work was something we grew up around and helped dad with, which made it unremarkable.
Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (2SdPm) at September 19, 2021 01:18 PM (2SdPm)

My wife's relatives are always so impressed I know how to do things around the house. My father in law is a contractor, he's glad I can do them but I get the impression he would think much less of me if I couldn't. As would his daughter for that matter, she's all about a trip to the Home Depot.

Yeah, I married up.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 02:15 PM (CcOog)

190 Except when the power is out. Landlines still work, but internet doesn't.
Posted by: Caesar North of the Rubicon at September 19, 2021 01:58 PM (BMmaB)


Last winter we had the ice storm that dropped power for the state, and for here about 8 hours.

The cell towers went down as well, and I was the brilliant guy with a land line and the black beauty dial phone!!!

I was in GOLDEN except everyone else is running cell phones and wall powered walk around phones.

There was no one to talk to, I spent a while getting "sorry cannot connect" messages until I gave up trying to call out.

It is sort of like owning the last Telex console in the world. *sigh* And I have that copy of the Phillips commercial code, still.

Posted by: Kindltot at September 19, 2021 02:17 PM (ssx3L)

191 There was no one to talk to

You should have called me.

Posted by: Steve in India at September 19, 2021 02:18 PM (Xrfse)

192 Chicken and waffles, then.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker

===

That's cold, man!

Posted by: Hogmartin's chickens at September 19, 2021 02:19 PM (oEn12)

193 There was no one to talk to

You should have called me.
Posted by: Steve in India

Or Jake, at State Farm.

Posted by: Tonypete at September 19, 2021 02:19 PM (mD/uy)

194 They never do and just let it go...
Posted by: Boswell at September 19, 2021 02:11 PM (5iUNf)

By the way, just so everyone knows, you can't put something into collections and attempt to hurt someone's credit rating without legal justification. A lot of fly by night collection guys have no idea about state tortious intent laws - which is why they are fly by night guys - but violations have real consequences and the company that refers things to collection that obviously cannot be collected is liable for their collection company's mistakes...

Posted by: Boswell at September 19, 2021 02:19 PM (5iUNf)

195 The Great Deppression generation must not have thrown out much if it had a use later.

I remember reading somewhere, a guy going through his dad's garage. Neat holemade cabinets with drawers, each labled with contents. Things like "Short Pieces Of String" and "Pencils - Too Short To Sharpen."

Yeah, they had a rough time of it and never forgot it. It's one reason the leftists have to work incrementally on their perfidy and machinations. The previous generations have to die off before the latest round of outrage and idiocy will be tolerated.

Democrats would have literally hanged the school boards for even half the woke shit they are pulling now. I'm not joking.

Posted by: Common Tater at September 19, 2021 02:19 PM (gBShP)

196 " ... faced with a cataclysm of sheet-rock repair, something I do very, very, badly."

I feel your pain; I am the same. Just bringing in a guy to do tape-and-mud after hanging all of the board myself. fun.

Posted by: sock_rat_eez (jDHSU) at September 19, 2021 02:19 PM (jDHSU)

197 You should have called me.
Posted by: Steve in India


Funny, Mahindar, real funny.

Posted by: Blanco Basura - moronhorde.com. Not insurgents, counterrevolutionaries. at September 19, 2021 02:20 PM (SchxB)

198 Off feathery sock

Posted by: vmom stabby stabby stabby stabamillion (oEn12) at September 19, 2021 02:21 PM (oEn12)

199 I had chicken and waffles not that long ago at a new place. They were good, though I don't think they are foie gras and Sauternes. They are not even a forty and cheetos. But there is nothing wrong with the pair if done right. But I had to choose a side and i went with cole slaw. To be honest, chicken, waffles, and cole slaw are not the greatest combo.

Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 02:21 PM (Ks/+3)

200 If you lived next to hogmartin you could have steak and eggs for breakfast.

....or not, since his chickens are still freeloading. ;p
Posted by: Helena Handbasket at September 19, 2021 02:03 PM (ACi07)
--

Did you know he has a chicken named Alex who is little, cute, and bossy?

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Live! from the Dungeon of Discord at September 19, 2021 02:22 PM (Dc2NZ)

201 I have a shit ton of sockets I hate to take to the salvation army. Inherited two generations of tools and already had my own.

Posted by: Infidel at September 19, 2021 02:24 PM (Kx3kq)

202 Twain:
First God made idiots. That was for practice.
Then He made school boards.

Posted by: torabora at September 19, 2021 02:26 PM (aa+zj)

203 the princess phone will work when the power is down

Posted by: REDACTED at September 19, 2021 02:26 PM (uCLWI)

204 Mr. S and I actually like to build things together. We even like to assemble IKEA furniture (I know, hush).

Except hanging pictures. I do that when he's out of town, so I don't kill him.

The last major thing we did was a workbench for the garage, as his old one was too gargantuan to move. We realized age was catching up to us because it was "measure once, forget to write it down, measure again, misplace the note with your calculations, measure again, write it directly on the board, cut".

We got it done, but I told him if the kids had seen us, they'd have put us in a home.

Posted by: sal at September 19, 2021 02:27 PM (3c1fY)

205 redundancy in comms is the only reason we still have a landline phone ... well that, and comes practically for free with our internet service.

Posted by: sock_rat_eez (jDHSU) at September 19, 2021 02:29 PM (jDHSU)

206 My wife's relatives are always so impressed I know how to do things around the house. My father in law is a contractor, he's glad I can do them but I get the impression he would think much less of me if I couldn't. As would his daughter for that matter, she's all about a trip to the Home Depot.

Yeah, I married up.
Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 02:15 PM (CcOog)
-------------------

I've spent a lot of time teaching our younger son how to do DIY. He's back home after graduating from college, and is now working on a teaching credential, so he's around when I do stuff.

He's really interested in it ("don't do it until I get back!"), which is not only useful, but even better, it is good father-son time.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:29 PM (YqDXo)

207 The alarm device probably came with a larger escutcheon plate but installer probably said, "Ef it. Good enough."

Posted by: Phuk Ho Le at September 19, 2021 02:30 PM (KpeyA)

208 two words: Caulk

Posted by: gilbar at September 19, 2021 02:31 PM (9H0g+)

209 I have a shit ton of sockets I hate to take to the salvation army. Inherited two generations of tools and already had my own.

Posted by: Infidel at September 19, 2021 02:24 PM (Kx3kq)

you can inherit much worse. We had a cousin maybe twenty times removed that we discovered late in life. She lived to 106 years of age. Somehow I have crap from her husband who died 50 years before her. I have monogrammed stuff from some guy I missed meeting by 40 years.

Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 02:32 PM (Ks/+3)

210 205 redundancy in comms is the only reason we still have a landline phone ... well that, and comes practically for free with our internet service.
Posted by: sock_rat_eez (jDHSU) at September 19, 2021 02:29 PM (jDHSU)
--------------------

Same here. Of course, the landline is VoIP, so a power outage would take it out too, but ...

Among other things it provides a better connection than the cell. We pay for cell minutes, but not landline time, so it's much better for lengthy conference calls.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:32 PM (YqDXo)

211 There was no one to talk to

You should have called me.
Posted by: Steve in India

Or Jake, at State Farm.
Posted by: Tonypete at September 19, 2021 02:19 PM (mD/uy)
***

I wonder what ever happened to white guy Jake?

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 02:32 PM (axyOa)

212 two words: Caulk
Posted by: gilbar

Yes!?

Oh, 'caulk'. Damn

Posted by: Shep at September 19, 2021 02:32 PM (mD/uy)

213 I stopped doing diy around our house about 15 years ago. A man has got to know his limitations.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at September 19, 2021 02:33 PM (EZebt)

214 hiya

Posted by: JT at September 19, 2021 02:33 PM (arJlL)

215 I'm so old I remember when sheetrock was called gypsum wallboard, but then I remember 'lath and plaster' too.

Posted by: Eromero at September 19, 2021 02:34 PM (0OP+5)

216 Or Jake, at State Farm.
Posted by: Tonypete at September 19, 2021 02:19 PM (mD/uy)
***

I wonder what ever happened to white guy Jake?

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 02:32 PM


We have a guy here who works at State Farm and his name is Jake. He is literally, Jake from State Farm. They trot him out to all of the charitable events and stuff like that. He was at the food pantry event last month wearing his "Jake from State Farm" polo shirt. And yes he is white.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at September 19, 2021 02:35 PM (JUOKG)

217
he princess phone will work when the power is down
Posted by: REDACTED


That's fine if you want to talk to Meghan Markle.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at September 19, 2021 02:35 PM (63Dwl)

218 I have tools inherited from my Grandfather, FiL and if my dad ever gets tired of doing stuff him., plus all tools I have bought.

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 02:35 PM (2JoB8)

219 DIY. I had to explain to my boy's fiancee what a concrete mixer is used for. She's an elemntary school teacher.

Posted by: BluesFish at September 19, 2021 02:36 PM (kPJ/p)

220 I never understood the alarm thing. They used to hire Mormons to sell them for reasons that really don't need to be explained. My dad had Alzheimers and they sold him on everything. WHen I made them take it all down, they were much less friendly.

I am not saying don't get one, I would never go that far. But if people have Alzheimers, the last thing you need is a place that goes ape shit every time someone goes through the wrong door.

Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 02:36 PM (Ks/+3)

221 >>>It's one reason the leftists have to work incrementally on their perfidy and
---

BOING say the magic woid and win a song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-vo-w-D4W4

Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 02:36 PM (UJBzp)

222 I have tools inherited from my Grandfather, FiL and if my dad ever gets tired of doing stuff him., plus all tools I have bought.

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 02:35 PM (2JoB

Clint from Grand Torino explains that it takes a lifetime to acquire a shit load of tools.

Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 02:37 PM (Ks/+3)

223 I remember wall board that had holes in it. Instead of lath you put up this crap and plastered over it.

Posted by: Ronster at September 19, 2021 02:37 PM (TS8/c)

224 Still have a land line with answering machine attached. I always give out land line # and let the machine answer all calls. Prevents so many useless calls clogging up the cell phone. That's reserved for work and family contacts primarily.

Posted by: olddog in mo, Pontoon Captain* (like a real captain, only drunker) at September 19, 2021 02:38 PM (ju2Fy)

225 On that smoke detector just need to push any parts below ceiling level, get spackle tape cutting it to radius around the put thin coat around, press in tape and smooth out.

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 02:38 PM (2JoB8)

226 201 I have a shit ton of sockets I hate to take to the salvation army. Inherited two generations of tools and already had my own.
Posted by: Infidel at September 19, 2021 02:24 PM (Kx3kq)
---------------------

I had duplicates of lots of tools when my father died. I gave them to friends and neighbors as needed. Spreads the wealth, builds friendships, and provides an opportunity to show newbies how to use the stuff.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:38 PM (YqDXo)

227 I'd have put up the Linda Rondstadt one but she can't sing it in English

Here's Julie London's take:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kVmkOwE_TY4

Es claro, si?

Posted by: Braenyard at September 19, 2021 02:39 PM (UJBzp)

228 I love DIY stuff. I'm sure on the stuff I can't do the people that are doing it get tired of me asking questions and watching over their shoulder.

Posted by: Ben Had at September 19, 2021 02:39 PM (2XkiP)

229 I used to always have a cheap landline phone (without all the bells and whistles that need an electric outlet) for power outages. The copper lines still got through. But nowadays they often don't maintain those lines.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Live! from the Dungeon of Discord at September 19, 2021 02:39 PM (Dc2NZ)

230 I've spent a lot of time teaching our younger son how to do DIY. He's back home after graduating from college, and is now working on a teaching credential, so he's around when I do stuff.

He's really interested in it ("don't do it until I get back!"), which is not only useful, but even better, it is good father-son time.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:29 PM

Over 35 years ago I took my oldest son (age 12) on a cable job. dropped a drill bit through the floor, and told him to drag the cable over and and put the copper stinger through in the end of the bit. Hsaid I ain't going under that house. I said fine go sit in the truck. He wondered why he didn't get paid.

Posted by: Eromero at September 19, 2021 02:40 PM (0OP+5)

231
There are direct replacement LED tubes for fluorescent fixtures, no need to replace the old fixture. They do use the fluorescent ballast, though, so if the ballast is bad in the original fixture, might as well do a whole replacement.

I've replaced ballasts, but I remove the bad one and take it with me to the hardware store to get a match. Not hard to swap it out, but it's a lot easier if you take the fixture down.

Posted by: boynsea at September 19, 2021 02:42 PM (cx155)

232 224 Still have a land line with answering machine attached. I always give out land line # and let the machine answer all calls. Prevents so many useless calls clogging up the cell phone. That's reserved for work and family contacts primarily.
Posted by: olddog in mo, Pontoon Captain* (like a real captain, only drunker) at September 19, 2021 02:38 PM (ju2Fy)
--------------------

I bought a Digitone ProSeries II call blocker. It's fantastic, and highly recommended. It is pre-programmed to block calls from, e.g., "unavailable," or V234567887654 autodialers. One press of a button and a bogus number - or bogus name - is blocked forever.

Most call blockers don't have a "block by name" feature, so that the a-holes who keep changing their number get through anyway. This one allows you to zap a-holes by name as well. Change your number all you like, pendejo.

https://tinyurl.com/yfztd57r

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:43 PM (YqDXo)

233 Quint, the last months of Dad's life I was a mama bear. I remember telling one asshole if he ever called again I was reporting them to the FCC. Shit slowed down after that. Those people are vultures.

Posted by: Infidel at September 19, 2021 02:43 PM (Kx3kq)

234 We still have a land line. Our Internet, which is fiber is bundled with it and together it cost less than the fiber by itself. My wife uses the house phone a lot.

Nobody talks to me, so....

Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 19, 2021 02:43 PM (BFigT)

235 I have a shit ton of sockets I hate to take to the salvation army. Inherited two generations of tools and already had my own.

Posted by: Infidel at September 19, 2021 02:24 PM (Kx3kq)


And not a single 10mm socket in the lot of it...

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 02:43 PM (CcOog)

236 Brother had an addition built and his 80 year old neighbor insisted he let him plaster the walls. I thought no way this guy can do this. Me and my 3 brothers labored for the guy. Had arms like Popeye. Beautiful job, really in awe. Last of the old breed.

Posted by: dartist at September 19, 2021 02:44 PM (+ya+t)

237 And not a single 10mm socket in the lot of it...
Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde

There is a huge pile of them mixed in with orphaned socks somewhere.

Posted by: Shep at September 19, 2021 02:45 PM (mD/uy)

238 Posted by: Eromero at September 19, 2021 02:40 PM (0OP+5)
----
I was such a pia at 12 my father put me to work in the summers with a plumber. They made crawl into the crawlsoaces and old that gotdam sewer snake line all day long.

I can still sweat a joint like a pro 53 years later.

Posted by: BluesFish at September 19, 2021 02:45 PM (kPJ/p)

239 He's really interested in it ("don't do it until I get back!"), which is not only useful, but even better, it is good father-son time.


That is making good memories!
The Daughters of Diogenes weren't much into DIY, but they can change a tire and drive a stick.
Good times.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 02:45 PM (axyOa)

240 235 I have a shit ton of sockets I hate to take to the salvation army. Inherited two generations of tools and already had my own.

Posted by: Infidel at September 19, 2021 02:24 PM
In zombie times you will be a bronze god.

Posted by: Eromero at September 19, 2021 02:45 PM (0OP+5)

241 There are direct replacement LED tubes for fluorescent fixtures, no need to replace the old fixture. They do use the fluorescent ballast, though, so if the ballast is bad in the original fixture, might as well do a whole replacement.
-----------------------

Nah. 86 the ballast, and replace the tombstones (the lamp holders) with the non-shunted ones that come with the LED tubes. The whole job takes about 10 minutes.

("Non-shunted" means that there are two connections in the tombstone, a hot and a neutral. LED tubes are powered entirely from one end, unlike fluorescent tubes, so there is no electrical connection to one end. I hope this makes sense.)

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:46 PM (YqDXo)

242 Quint, the last months of Dad's life I was a mama bear. I remember telling one asshole if he ever called again I was reporting them to the FCC. Shit slowed down after that. Those people are vultures.

Posted by: Infidel at September 19, 2021 02:43 PM (Kx3kq)

we put up a sign on the front door that said "no solicitors". Several remarked that they "almost" didn't knock because of the sign.

Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 02:46 PM (Ks/+3)

243 My wife tells me stories about how her dad used to have her out vacuuming the grass (to pick up the dropped nails) on his job sites while her friends were all out playing.

She also told me never hold drywall for him while he goes "out to the truck" for drywall fasteners. Apparently he will get out to the truck, won't be able to find them, and then drive to the hardware store while you are sitting there holding up the drywall.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 02:47 PM (CcOog)

244 We had all our baseboards and crown redone during the other renovations. The guy who did it was in his 70's and did an amazing job. Every joint and cut is perfect. He did our door trim and window trim too. He could just look at a corner and judge how the cut would go.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at September 19, 2021 02:47 PM (BFigT)

245 19 A big fancy gold leafed medallion with Angels blowing trumpets would really make that smoke detector pop.
Posted by: f'd at September 19, 2021 01:10 PM (Tnijr)

; )

"Pop" was a big surprise to me, there.

Posted by: m at September 19, 2021 02:48 PM (RYc1G)

246 And not a single 10mm socket in the lot of it...
Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde

There is a huge pile of them mixed in with orphaned socks somewhere.
Posted by: Shep at September 19, 2021 02:45 PM (mD/uy)

All buried under a ton of tupperware lids.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 02:48 PM (axyOa)

247 The Daughters of Diogenes weren't much into DIY, but they can change a tire and drive a stick.
Good times.
Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 02:45 PM (axyOa)

Verily, you have Done It Right.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 02:48 PM (CcOog)

248 I still do all my own plumbing. I do hire someone to dig the holes on the outdoor stuff though.

Posted by: Ben Had at September 19, 2021 02:49 PM (2XkiP)

249 I was such a pia at 12 my father put me to work in the summers with a plumber. They made crawl into the crawlsoaces and old that gotdam sewer snake line all day long.

I can still sweat a joint like a pro 53 years later.

Posted by: BluesFish at September 19, 2021 02:45 PM
Me too, Pappy Eromero was a contractor and farmed me out to all the trades. Plumber had me crawling under the house with molten lead and oakum for sewer pipe.

Posted by: Eromero at September 19, 2021 02:49 PM (0OP+5)

250 There might be something worse that Alarm Companies.

Taliban

Pentagon

FBI

Posted by: Capn Ned (Raging Queen) at September 19, 2021 02:50 PM (yrol0)

251 I still do all my own plumbing. I do hire someone to dig the holes on the outdoor stuff though.
Posted by: Ben Had at September 19, 2021 02:49 PM (2XkiP)

I will admit, I hire a lot of stuff out these days. At this point in my life I have the money to pay for stuff, what I don't have is the time (or, much as I hate to admit it, sometimes the physical ability) to do it.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 02:51 PM (CcOog)

252 Re tools, sad experience has taught me to buy the right tool for the job, always. Don't wing it. The right tool makes the job easy, you do better work, and afterwards you always have the tool. Same problem presents itself, you've got it nailed in a few minutes.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:51 PM (YqDXo)

253 we put up a sign on the front door that said "no solicitors". Several remarked that they "almost" didn't knock because of the sign.
Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 02:46 PM (Ks/+3)

shoot one hang em up at the fence post

Posted by: Capn Ned (Raging Queen) at September 19, 2021 02:51 PM (yrol0)

254 You could probably rip the top off a pizza box and put that over the hole, shove the thing that needs mounting through it.

Pro DIY tip: the top of the box will have a little less grease than the bottom.

Posted by: hogmartin at September 19, 2021 02:52 PM (P4LRL)

255 https://www.americanthinker.com/so how did 15000 haitian illegals suddenly find their way to del rio texas
https://tinyurl.com/nhv88p5d

The biggest 1st world problem, was wondering myself

Posted by: Skip at September 19, 2021 02:52 PM (2JoB8)

256 The right tool makes the job easy, you do better work, and afterwards you always have the tool. Same problem presents itself, you've got it nailed in a few minutes.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:51 PM (YqDXo)

That's what happens these days, the wife says "Hey, I have a great home improvement idea" and I say "Imma need to go to the tool store..."

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 02:53 PM (CcOog)

257 247 The Daughters of Diogenes weren't much into DIY, but they can change a tire and drive a stick.
Good times.
Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 02:45 PM (axyOa)
-------------------

Even my wife can do that. She insisted on watching me change a tire. Learning to drive in Europe, she could always drive a stick.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:53 PM (YqDXo)

258 I had to unclog some PVC underneath a frat kitchen in the middle of summer.
Don't wanna tell you about the vileness that was shat forth.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at September 19, 2021 02:54 PM (vuisn)

259 Warming.


Robot is Armed.

Danger.

( make window stickers )

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 19, 2021 02:55 PM (T1fV4)

260 Mrs. E was raised on a dairy/beef operation in Colorado. Drove the silage truck as soon as she could reach the pedals and look through the steering wheel.

Posted by: Eromero at September 19, 2021 02:56 PM (0OP+5)

261 My garbage disposal is leaking like a sieve into the cupboard below the sink. I don't have the strength or know-how to replace it, so I have to call a handyman or plumber that won't bilk me. Preferably one that can adjust the faucet, too.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 19, 2021 02:56 PM (/+bwe)

262 That's what happens these days, the wife says "Hey, I have a great home improvement idea" and I say "Imma need to go to the tool store..."
Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 02:53 PM (CcOog)
-----------------

In our previous house, Chateau Merde, tree roots used to grow into the sewage outfall, blocking it and causing sewage to back up into the house. I never figured out how the trees knew it was Memorial Day, Fourth of July, or Labor Day, but they did.

I finally bought a power auger ($400) so when this happened thereafter, after I'd had a cleanout plug put outside a few feet from the house, I'd knock the problem out in 20 minutes.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:56 PM (YqDXo)

263
Among other things it provides a better connection than the cell. We pay for cell minutes, but not landline time, so it's much better for lengthy conference calls.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:32 PM (YqDXo)

I don't have a land line because i always hated talking on phones.Checkthat,I hated that phones could interrupt you at any moment. OF course i was into a chick i wanted her to call lol.

My old school thing is every comment i have ever made here has been done on an old PC. Sure I have the fancy phones,but I never considered that to be the real internet.

Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 02:58 PM (Ks/+3)

264 CBD sashays, prances, and minces?? Hmmmmmmm.

Posted by: totally not garrett at September 19, 2021 02:58 PM (sjdRT)

265 Mrs. E was raised on a dairy/beef operation in Colorado. Drove the silage truck as soon as she could reach the pedals and look through the steering wheel.
Posted by: Eromero at September 19, 2021 02:56 PM (0OP+5)


Talk about easy gift buying! Perfume every Christmas.

Posted by: Diogenes at September 19, 2021 02:58 PM (axyOa)

266 Deplorable Jay Guevara @ 262- I bet that power auger made you a popular guy in your community.

Posted by: Eromero at September 19, 2021 02:59 PM (0OP+5)

267 That American Thinker link is good, but mostly for its own link to Todd Bensman's stuff. He's been documenting the entire migration problem for years, often from as far as Panama.

Posted by: rhomboid (OTzUX) at September 19, 2021 02:59 PM (OTzUX)

268 I finally bought a power auger ($400) so when this happened thereafter, after I'd had a cleanout plug put outside a few feet from the house, I'd knock the problem out in 20 minutes.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:56 PM (YqDXo)

That'll teach 'em. At least they waited until you had some time to deal with them.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 02:59 PM (CcOog)

269 Avast ye scurvy chislers! Ye services not even be fit for the dogs! Arrrrr!

Posted by: Insomniac - Zhou Bai-Den Is Not My Chairman at September 19, 2021 02:59 PM (II3Gr)

270 >269 Avast ye scurvy chislers! Ye services not even be fit for the dogs! Arrrrr!

Posted by: Insomniac - Zhou Bai-Den Is Not My Chairman at September 19, 2021 02:59 PM (II3Gr)


I am prepared to be boarded!

Posted by: totally not garrett at September 19, 2021 03:00 PM (sjdRT)

271 Mrs rhennigantx has never owned an Auto.

Posted by: rhennigantx at September 19, 2021 03:00 PM (yrol0)

272 261 My garbage disposal is leaking like a sieve into the cupboard below the sink. I don't have the strength or know-how to replace it, so I have to call a handyman or plumber that won't bilk me. Preferably one that can adjust the faucet, too.
Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 19, 2021 02:56 PM (/+bwe)
--------------------

Easy 20 minute job. Disconnect the plumbing and electrical connections on the old one, throw the old one away, lift the new one up to the sink connection, twist the new one to engage the sink connection, then twist the disposal and the sink connection to the desired orientation. Reconnect the plumbing (simple matter of tightening a threaded connection, plug in the new disposal, and voila! You're done.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 03:01 PM (YqDXo)

273 FOOD NOOD

Posted by: Skip guy who says NOOD at September 19, 2021 03:01 PM (2JoB8)

274 271 Mrs rhennigantx has never owned an Auto.

Posted by: rhennigantx at September 19, 2021 03:00 PM
Revolver gal, eh?

Posted by: Eromero at September 19, 2021 03:02 PM (0OP+5)

275 So out of 587K AZ voters registered in last 2 years and trying to verify through SSA (name DOB last 4) 58% Do NOT exist.

Posted by: rhennigantx at September 19, 2021 03:02 PM (yrol0)

276 Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 19, 2021 02:56 PM (/+bwe)

I replaced a disposal years ago in the old place and put in a new faucet. Then the one here started leaking, I called my handyman and had him replace the disposal, sink and faucet. Black porcelain and bronze were not my fav.

Now i need to have him install a ceiling fan in the bedroom. I don't do electrical.

Posted by: Infidel at September 19, 2021 03:02 PM (Kx3kq)

277 Even my wife can do that. She insisted on watching me change a tire. Learning to drive in Europe, she could always drive a stick.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 02:53 PM (YqDXo)
The Dems love to mandate things. They should mandate sticks. Maybe the roads wont be as clogged. I had a car with a stick and a choke and it was considered to be a fancy car. People get used to what they are used to. If you stop asking them to do things, I suppose they will go along.

I think driving a stick and doing three other things at the same time are the real driver's test. And no phone is involved.

Posted by: Quint at September 19, 2021 03:03 PM (Ks/+3)

278 I used to do repair and improvement work on our houses back in the day, all except electrical. Learned my lessons early on.

Posted by: Javems at September 19, 2021 03:04 PM (AmoqO)

279 Even my wife....

.not a good sentence.

Even my husband can do more pushups than the president.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 19, 2021 03:07 PM (T1fV4)

280 Easy 20 minute job. Disconnect the plumbing and electrical connections on the old one, throw the old one away, lift the new one up to the sink connection, twist the new one to engage the sink connection, then twist the disposal and the sink connection to the desired orientation. Reconnect the plumbing (simple matter of tightening a threaded connection, plug in the new disposal, and voila! You're done.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 03:01 PM (YqDXo)

Ugh, that's what I was afraid of. My dad replaced the old one and I figured it would be good for more than eight years. Silly me! But thanks for the advice. That's probably the cheapest way to fix it.

Infidel, I can replace a fan or light fixture, provided the original electrician put in a BOX to support it (yay, ungrounded fixtures attached to an wire dangling from the rafters.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at September 19, 2021 03:09 PM (/+bwe)

281
That's what happens these days, the wife says "Hey, I have a great home improvement idea" and I say "Imma need to go to the tool store..."
Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at September 19, 2021 02:53 PM (CcOog)


Tool stores for adults is like Toys R Us for kids.

Posted by: Justsayin' at September 19, 2021 03:17 PM (Fs5vw)

282 They have trailers just for tools. Tool trailers if you will.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at September 19, 2021 03:21 PM (T1fV4)

283 Now i need to have him install a ceiling fan in the bedroom. I don't do electrical.
Posted by: Infidel at September 19, 2021 03:02 PM (Kx3kq)
-------------
Also an easy job. Punch through the drywall (e.g., with a hammer) and feel around to make sure there are no wires or pipes where you plan on installing the fan. Enlarge the hole to about 4" in diameter, and slip in a ceiling fan brace (https://tinyurl.com/yz8nszns) and tighten the feet of the brace against the joists, centering the electrical box over the hole. (This will make sense when you see it.)

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 03:26 PM (YqDXo)

284 Wire up your fan on the ground to a roll of Romex and snake the end of the Romex through the electrical box until you've got at least 15' up in the attic. Hang the fan from the electrical box (it's kind of obvious when you look at it), snug it down, then go up in the attic and make the electrical connection, cutting the Romex to length as needed. Ideally you've got a junction box nearby, and make the connections (I like push-in connectors for this). If the junction box is metal, be sure to use cable clamps on the Romex. Normally you'd want to make sure you're not drawing too much current on a circuit, but fans only draw about 60 W.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at September 19, 2021 03:26 PM (YqDXo)

285 I own a countertop shop in CT. I can get you a thin piece of Corian to use as a plate. It will work just fine.

Posted by: Flashbazzo, S.E. at September 19, 2021 03:30 PM (FAc4m)

286 DAP Wall Repair Patch Kit

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhdtcazJELU

Posted by: Lawrence L at September 19, 2021 03:52 PM (FAuXd)

287 Looking for volunteers for Gen Milley's firing squad. Call 1-EAT-SHIT-MILLEY.

Posted by: An Observation sez China Joe not my president at September 19, 2021 04:13 PM (eSPeG)

288 Look up Can light goof ring- plastic rings of various diameters made to cover things like your poor fitting smoke detectors- no mudding!

Posted by: Stew at September 19, 2021 04:22 PM (GbRzx)

289
Sens. Mitt Romney and Michael Bennet led a bipartisan rafting trip down the Colorado river "focused on solutions to building climate resilience in the West."


Remove their PFDs and toss them overboard - is that bipartisan enough for you?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at September 19, 2021 04:48 PM (+2sc/)

290 The smoke detector is new. Consider replacing the entire house.

Posted by: 4thewin at September 19, 2021 05:30 PM (Oq5a2)

291 Chris Rock with a breakthrough case, allegedly, now pushing vax. Fuck these people.

Posted by: Too Bad Costa Rica Sucks at September 19, 2021 05:32 PM (oWBc3)

292 My son learned how to hammer nails by playing a drinking game at college. Very helpful when we rebuilt the deck and he could do it sober too.

Posted by: 4thewin at September 19, 2021 05:46 PM (Oq5a2)

293 Guess the pilots in Texas didn't see the Great Santini.

Posted by: Too Bad Costa Rica Sucks at September 19, 2021 05:55 PM (oWBc3)

294 AOC issues bill to an arms sales to Israel, but guess who will vote harder for the Dems regardless? My head hurts.

Posted by: Too Bad Costa Rica Sucks at September 19, 2021 05:58 PM (oWBc3)

295 Having worked as the head tech for an alarm company? I'm amazed you got 17 years out of a door sensor. Those systems aren't too hard to troubleshoot yourself if you're bored enough since all of their schematics and guide books are online. Used to use them to sidestep ADT who would try to sabotage systems on their way out with the 2Gig switch.

Posted by: The Dead Man at September 19, 2021 06:07 PM (9Odb7)

296 The world burns, news continues - but run like a rabbit, creatures of habit as they say. Weekend on the only meaningful conservative blog left.

Posted by: Too Bad Costa Rica Sucks at September 19, 2021 06:10 PM (oWBc3)

297 You can fix that problem with some white latex caulk in about 2 minutes.

Posted by: Gobagoo at September 19, 2021 07:14 PM (2Ia/C)

298 Goof ring FTW

Posted by: Killface at September 19, 2021 07:47 PM (fYDMz)

299 I've been doing some repair work in the basement since Ida flooded it, basically patching brick walls where old morter has started to dry, filling floor cracks and painting everything. It's an unfinished basement, but i have a small gym down there so figured I'd spruce things up.

Our ceiling down there is sheetrock and when one of our electricians did work years ago he apparently decided the best way to fish wires through was to just punch holes in the ceiling, i thought about fixing it, but decided just to screw other pieces of sheetrock on top.

Posted by: Rbastid at September 19, 2021 07:51 PM (9953X)

300 The make some lovely new sheetrock repair tapes nowadays. Nice and thin, fine-mesh weaves of adhesive tape that are perfect for small patch jobs. Give 'em a try. Some tape, a little spackle and eventually a light paint touch-up. - Finis -

Posted by: BZ in Idaho at September 19, 2021 09:10 PM (BGYcC)

301 Smoke detector cover plates will cover the drywall hole.

www.chadwellsupply.com search for UNIVERSAL SMOKE DETECTOR COVERPLATE

Posted by: Douglas Gilmore at September 20, 2021 09:58 AM (/FGMG)

302 Take the detectors back down and install them in the correct spot using a crossbar adapter available at most home improvement stores.

Posted by: Krobe at September 20, 2021 10:26 AM (sBCe7)

303 Lowes has small bags of sheet rock dust. Just put some a cup
and add water to make a paste and apply.

Posted by: R Wood at September 20, 2021 10:58 AM (kzdfb)

304 There are devices that don't fit current holes in ceilings.
What you use is a device that is like a washer for a bolt, it is a decorative disk with a hole in it, most commonly used for light fixtures and ceiling fans.

Posted by: obsidian at September 20, 2021 11:13 AM (HvbS2)

305 This device looks plenty large enough to cover the current hole in the ceiling. It is offset from the hole because the installer didn't have the proper bracket.

Posted by: Krobe at September 20, 2021 08:05 PM (sBCe7)

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