Woman Alleges She Was Groped -- Virtually -- Inside Mark Zuckerberg's "Meta" Virtual World

At first I wondered what she could mean -- there's no "Press X to Grope" button, surely.

But this is Zuck's stupid virtual world where you slip on VR goggles and VR gloves. So to "grope" someone, you'd just walk up to their avatar and use your virtual "hands" to squeeze their virtual "breasts" or "butt."

So you could do that.

Let's slip on our virtual reality goggles and enter ClownWorld and find out what's going on.

A beta tester for Meta's metaverse virtual reality platform Horizon Worlds says she was virtually groped in what may be the first allegation of its kind.
Meta revealed the allegation on Dec. 1, saying the alleged act occurred on Nov. 26. The woman reported the groping in a Facebook group associated with the beta test.

"Sexual harassment is no joke on the regular internet, but being in VR adds another layer that makes the event more intense," she wrote, the Verge reports.

Wait a minute, wait a gee-darn minute.

She's claiming that the fact that this happened in virtual reality, to a completely fake virtual body, makes this "more intense" than if it happened in real life to her real body?

Really?

ClownWorld.

"Not only was I groped last night, but there were other people there who supported this behavior which made me feel isolated in the Plaza." The "Plaza" is a virtual social hub within the metaverse.

Did they really support it, though? Based on the obviously-untrue claim she's made about this being worse than a real case of sexual assault, I don't think I can take her word for how others were behaving.

I tend to think she was behaving hysterically and they maybe did not fully support her hysterias which she is now misreporting as "supporting" the guy who virtually groped her.

Vivek Sharma, Meta's vice president of Horizon, called the incident "absolutely unfortunate." Meta reviewed the incident and says that the woman did not use certain built-in safety features, including the ability to block users.

Meanwhile, the hunt for the virtual molester goes on.

Uh, no, update! They found him.

User name: BrandonDaGreat696969.

Posted by: Ace at 03:52 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 sponge

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 03:51 PM (LvTSG)

2 What?

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 03:52 PM (Ez6QX)

3 Whoa

Posted by: Clyde Shelton at December 27, 2021 03:52 PM (Do5/p)

4 Yeah, right.

Posted by: klaftern at December 27, 2021 03:53 PM (taPSh)

5

Palomino! Palomino!

Posted by: My Pimp Shot My Dealer at December 27, 2021 03:54 PM (gxiL9)

6 If that wasn't something that happened in the first 2 min of the beta I'd be shocked.

Posted by: Inogame X-State Lines at December 27, 2021 03:54 PM (53oGX)

7 This is so stupid it makes my head hurt.

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 03:54 PM (Ez6QX)

8 Wonder how much tis "woman's" avitar looked like her... I've got a guess...

Posted by: Inogame X-State Lines at December 27, 2021 03:55 PM (53oGX)

9 The groper had the user name David Copafeel

Posted by: Busted can of Biscuits at December 27, 2021 03:55 PM (2cfUo)

10 Are you sure his username isn't, "Uncle"whoonlyshowerswith8yrolds?

This could be a caption contest.

Posted by: Scott_T at December 27, 2021 03:55 PM (2waQ7)

11 How could she feel the grope? Was she wearing a reactive body suit or something?

Posted by: zmdavid at December 27, 2021 03:55 PM (xqRaG)

12 Well, let's outlaw the Metaverse, since the potential for abuse is so high. Then that will be one less stupid thing we have to hear about.

Posted by: Notsothoreau - look forward at December 27, 2021 03:56 PM (5HBd1)

13 Y'all want to know what was next. Here you go.

Posted by: klaftern at December 27, 2021 03:56 PM (taPSh)

14 FIRST!!!!!

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 03:56 PM (Zz0t1)

15 This is just too funny!

Posted by: pawn at December 27, 2021 03:56 PM (kYVzH)

16 Is Meta Verse like Questworld from the 90s Johnny Quest? Will there be duels in the metaverse?

Posted by: Mishdog at December 27, 2021 03:56 PM (/VWLE)

17 >>"Sexual harassment is no joke on the regular internet, but being in VR adds another layer that makes the event more intense," she wrote, while lighting some candles and dimming the lights.

Posted by: garrett at December 27, 2021 03:56 PM (2JZa6)

18 I am so sick and f*cking tired of king harv that I blocked his domain at my router so I wouldn't click on him by accident anymore.

Posted by: BifBewalski @ (IJES/) - at December 27, 2021 03:56 PM (IJES/)

19 Reread Ace. She said "sexual harassment is no joke on the regular INTERNET" She may be triglypuff that would never get any harassment in actual meat space.

Posted by: PaleRider at December 27, 2021 03:57 PM (3cGpq)

20 The effort expended in the "look at me!!" movement is astounding.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 27, 2021 03:57 PM (mD/uy)

21 I said this when I first heard about it. There will be sexual assaults. There will be virtual police. There will be virtual courts and lawyers.

This will not end well.

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 03:57 PM (Zz0t1)

22 In the virtual reality world a little groping is nothing

Posted by: Skip at December 27, 2021 03:57 PM (2JoB8)

23 Gawd.
I virtually don't give a rat's ass about this.

Posted by: Diogenes at December 27, 2021 03:57 PM (axyOa)

24 Teh stupid. It burns.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at December 27, 2021 03:57 PM (BFigT)

25 This is not true. I have been trying to get a hand job on there for weeks !

Posted by: Hatari somewhere on Ventura Highway at December 27, 2021 03:58 PM (M+Lyo)

26 Meta reviewed the incident and says that the woman did not use certain built-in safety features, including the ability to block users.

Ah.....good old victim shaming. It's HER fault, you see, not Meta's. SHE didn't take the proper precautions.

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 03:58 PM (Zz0t1)

27 But this is Zuck's stupid virtual world where you slip on VR goggles and VR gloves. So to "grope" someone, you'd just walk up to their avatar and use your virtual "hands" to squeeze their virtual "breasts" or "butt."

Do they have anything for your virtual dick?

Posted by: Shooter McGavin at December 27, 2021 03:58 PM (f8/Bk)

28 Metaverse is such a bad idea...has anyone seen tween and teen boys play the Sims? This is just the Sims, but real people are on the other end, and with the sheer volume of mentally ill and rationally-deficient folks in this country combined with immaturity and virtualness - well, I hope Mark doesn't like money b/c this venture will bankrupt him...

Posted by: Nova local at December 27, 2021 03:58 PM (exHjb)

29 She "thought" she felt something, and that is money in the bank.

Posted by: klaftern at December 27, 2021 03:58 PM (taPSh)

30 What a stupid time to be alive

Posted by: It's me donna at December 27, 2021 03:58 PM (TdaKq)

31 At least she wasn't derezzed after the groping incident.

End of Line.

Posted by: Curly Shuffle at December 27, 2021 03:59 PM (TNyrE)

32 our culture is like a black hole of stupid

Posted by: DB at December 27, 2021 03:59 PM (0KxNW)

33 Imagine the virtual world of Eichenwald.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 03:59 PM (SH2Zi)

34 I wonder what virtual hair smells like?
Anyone know?

Asking for a, well, not exactly a friend, but you know...

Posted by: Diogenes at December 27, 2021 04:00 PM (axyOa)

35 I'm sorry I can't stop laughing

my kids are downstairs LITERALLy MURDERING EaCH OTHER with the games they just got for christmas!

major major assault with a deadly weapon going on up in here!

Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 04:00 PM (j9HX3)

36 Wasn't this the plot of Tron?

Posted by: garrett at December 27, 2021 04:00 PM (2JZa6)

37 Groped ? I hope he had his vaccine and wore his mask

Posted by: It's me donna at December 27, 2021 04:00 PM (TdaKq)

38 It's like that Bruce Willis movie, "Surrogates." "You don't know who we are," says the hot babe surrogate threatening Willis. "You're right, you could be some fat guy with his dick hanging out," he responds.

I don't know how it's like that, but it's like that.

Posted by: yep at December 27, 2021 04:00 PM (uE+or)

39 >>This is just the Sims, but real people are on the other end, and with the sheer volume of mentally ill and rationally-deficient folks in this country combined with immaturity and virtualness - well

I'm right here ya know.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 27, 2021 04:00 PM (ZLI7S)

40 This all has me thinking of that South Park episode where the boys train to take out the World of Warcraft jerk. I'm guessing that both the perp and "victim" look a little like that guy: huge, bad posture, with awful skin.

Posted by: She Hobbit at December 27, 2021 04:00 PM (ftFVW)

41 Old High School days if a guy didn't grope the girls he was a faggot.

and

If a girl didn't get groped she was a librarian.

Posted by: Braenyard thinks some jackass is changing his name at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (Xoxgm)

42 has anyone seen tween and teen boys play the Sims

my DAUGHTER used to show me the evil she was creating on the Sims

lol I don't even want to describe it to you guys - she's a wild one

she was worse than the boy

Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (j9HX3)

43 That reminds me, I got a bone to pick with ace. He talked me into watching Blue Shirt Guy movie. I didn't enjoy it like he did.

Posted by: lowandslow at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (4thlk)

44 I virtually don't give a rat's ass about this.
Posted by: Diogenes at December 27, 2021
24 Teh stupid. It burns.
Posted by: Martini Farmer
Yup. I appreciate being kept informed. But these people are idiots.
We got some snow out here. I think instead of doing anything in a virtual world. I might dig out the shed, grab my old snowshoes, and go for a walk.

Posted by: MikeM at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (X+eRS)

45 She probably had her dildo drone still bluetoothed.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (R8DW/)

46 How could she feel the grope? Was she wearing a reactive body suit or something?
Posted by: zmdavid at December 27, 2021 03:55 PM (xqRaG)

I could be wrong, but I think it's just goggles and gloves. I'm guessing it was something she saw, not something she felt. Which is why this is making my head hurt.

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (Ez6QX)

47 43 That reminds me, I got a bone to pick with ace. He talked me into watching Blue Shirt Guy movie. I didn't enjoy it like he did.
Posted by: lowandslow at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (4thlk)

=======

Free Guy?

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (LvTSG)

48 Google Glove Grope Gaggle - Goggle Girl Goosed!

Posted by: The Daily Mail at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (njfCw)

49 I got nuthin

Posted by: kallisto at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (DJFLF)

50 whaddya bet the avatars inside the whatever this is are wearing masks to ward off virtual viruses

Posted by: DB at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (0KxNW)

51 This is a rehash of a previous article. Guess they were smart enough to make the "victim" anonymous this time.

Posted by: squid_hunt at December 27, 2021 04:02 PM (7MBHe)

52 Willowed:
---
Biden has a meeting with the governors where he admits the federal government cannot "shut down the virus" (oddly enough not citing the virus's Constitutional rights).

He's ready to take questions.
The Biden administration says they have to "clear the press" first.
All the dutiful hacks for the DNC silently get to their feet and shuffle out of the room.

Posted by: Axeman at December 27, 2021 04:02 PM (OaZlZ)

53 It wasn't Brandon. He was showering with his daughter. So he even has a witness.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:02 PM (VpIIl)

54 Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (Ez6QX)

virtual hands squeezed her avatar

Posted by: kallisto at December 27, 2021 04:02 PM (DJFLF)

55 >>Wasn't this the plot of Tron?

Sleeper. The Orgasmatron.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 27, 2021 04:02 PM (ZLI7S)

56 The groper had the user name David Copafeel

Ophelia Crotch

Posted by: Reuben Hick at December 27, 2021 04:02 PM (+LCoQ)

57 Virtual groping?

Just go back into your bubble Karen. No Skinner Box is suitable for you.

Posted by: Anna Puma at December 27, 2021 04:02 PM (8IV2y)

58 Yup. I appreciate being kept informed. But these people are idiots.
We got some snow out here. I think instead of doing anything in a virtual world. I might dig out the shed, grab my old snowshoes, and go for a walk.
Posted by: MikeM at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (X+eRS)

It's a liberal world. All the libs will be there because it's their world under their control.

OF COURSE it will be a shithole.

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:02 PM (Zz0t1)

59 Stupid metaverse is for stupid losers.
No thanks, zuck.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 27, 2021 04:02 PM (URNdm)

60 >>>She may be triglypuff that would never get any harassment in actual meat space.

Posted by: PaleRider at December 27, 2021 03:57 PM (3cGpq)
------------

A virtual librarian.

Posted by: Braenyard thinks some jackass is changing his name at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (Xoxgm)

61 >>I could be wrong, but I think it's just goggles and gloves. I'm guessing it was something she saw

Did it look like a virtual baby arm, holding an apple?

Posted by: garrett at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (2JZa6)

62 Fifty something comments and nobody asked if she has nice cans? Who are you people?

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (VpIIl)

63 The groper had the user name David Copafeel

When operating as a team:

Ben Dover and Phil MacCrevice

Posted by: Reuben Hick at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (+LCoQ)

64 Free Guy?
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (LvTSG)

That's it. Didn't care for it.

Posted by: lowandslow at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (4thlk)

65 The groper had the user name David Copafeel

Ophelia Crotch
Posted by: Reuben Hick

Dick Gazinya

Posted by: Tonypete at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (mD/uy)

66 Who is Joe virtually groping in that picture?

Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (eGTCV)

67 Reread Ace. She said "sexual harassment is no joke on the regular INTERNET" She may be triglypuff that would never get any harassment in actual meat space.

Posted by: PaleRider at December 27, 2021 03:57 PM (3cGpq)

--------------
If you've subscribed to the USENET group alt.sex.harassment and are an active participant, then there is no room for ambiguity in that little corner of the Internet.

Posted by: Curly Shuffle at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (TNyrE)

68 Schwing on Gropey, Gropey schwing on...

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (P3gRi)

69 in film, the camera adds 10 lbs.

in VR, it makes 150 lbs disappear.

Posted by: x at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (oA+QO)

70 Wait til she gets a load of how you can be killed in some games

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (KZzsI)

71 I bet they had no trouble finding beta males for the beta test.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (Y5qcH)

72 Women as a whole are screwed if tech companies are ever able to offer men a virtual sex experience that approaches the real thing.

I bet all sorts of laws get passed real quick to shut it down for "reasons".

Posted by: Blago at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (PwNLq)

73 Crap. Forgot the link:

https://tinyurl.com/2p85csnw

Posted by: squid_hunt at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (7MBHe)

74 #MeToo

Posted by: redridinghood at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (NpAcC)

75 There are a lot of people who shouldn't play any VR games. With the amount of crazy around right now, these people won't be able to tell the real world from the virtual world. It does feel real and it could damage a lot of people. I love the VR games.

Posted by: megthered at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (sfWd9)

76 What's the punishment in this Meta World for murdering an avitar?

Posted by: Martini Farmer at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (BFigT)

77 Ace just can't quit us.

[And this old sock link still fits this post.]

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (UHVv4)

78 Wait til she gets a load of how you can be killed in some games
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor

Death by snu snu?

Posted by: Tonypete at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (mD/uy)

79 Stupid metaverse is for stupid losers.
No thanks, zuck.
Posted by: Lizzy at December 27, 2021 04:02 PM (URNdm)

And I fucking HATE that commercial.......can't really explain why, but it's so damn annoying.

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (Zz0t1)

80 Wonder if they'll make a jockstrap that works in conjunction with the thing you have to wear on your head?

Posted by: JROD at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (0jZnq)

81 Did it look like a virtual baby arm, holding an apple?
Posted by: garrett at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (2JZa6)

Probably. Isn't that what you would do if you could make yourself look however you wanted?

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (Ez6QX)

82 What are you wearing, Jake from State Farm?

Posted by: JackStraw at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (ZLI7S)

83 She should maybe try to relax. Put on some West Coast Jazz and maybe get comfortable with some warm Dickens Cider.

Posted by: garrett at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (2JZa6)

84 >> It's like that Bruce Willis movie, "Surrogates." "You don't know who we are," says the hot babe surrogate threatening Willis. "You're right, you could be some fat guy with his dick hanging out," he responds.

Yup. And in the end he crashes it and frees them.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (URNdm)

85 I'm thinking this Karen was just watching Demolition Man and really got into the movie.

Posted by: Diogenes at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (axyOa)

86 "Meta revealed..."

Creating their own reality.

Posted by: Golfman at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (hOMhY)

87 hiya

Posted by: JT at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (arJlL)

88 Come in, Tokyo!

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (4I/2K)

89 What next arrests before someone commits a virtual crime?

Posted by: Skip at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (2JoB8)

90 She's claiming that the fact that this happened in virtual reality, to a completely fake virtual body, makes this "more intense" than if it happened in real life to her real body?

--------

"Everybody knows that the virtual world is more real than reality for us, Luddite H8R!"

Posted by: ShainS -- Beware the Branch Covidians at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (0SFTT)

91 How many CNN producers are on Meta?

Posted by: Axeman at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (OaZlZ)

92 Flynn in Tron got digitized, or to quote V'GER he was 'patterned,' and dumped into MCP's memory banks.

So not quite alike

Posted by: Anna Puma at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (8IV2y)

93 I think instead of doing anything in a virtual world. I might dig out the shed, grab my old snowshoes, and go for a walk.

Posted by: MikeM at December 27, 2021 04:01 PM (X+eRS)

what do they have against real life? They're all squawking about the environment all the time, well get out there and plant a tree or save a sea turtle or some sheet

Be useful for one minute of your life

Posted by: kallisto at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (DJFLF)

94 Fifty something comments and nobody asked if she has nice cans? Who are you people?

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:03 PM (VpIIl)

I'd hammer that avatar like a hurricane in a screen door.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (SH2Zi)

95 The groper had the user name David Copafeel
----------------
Please, sir. May I have more?

Posted by: andycanuck (UHVv4) at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (UHVv4)

96 Welcome to Berlin, 1936 and Moscow, 1982. If you lived in those places at those times, you would be in a major, globally-important country. There were problems. There was weirdness. But overall, you were doing okay by the standards of both your history and your neighbors. If you were stopped on the street and asked by a journalist, "do you think this civilization will fail and cease to exist within 10 years?" then your answer would almost certainly be "no" - and not just because the secret police would end you otherwise. You'd mean it.

This is a civilization in its end stage. "Worry not about the endemic corruption, skyrocketing prices, constant propaganda, oppressive government policy, unstoppable state-aligned industrial juggernaut cartels, failed education, rotten culture, systematized sexual and interpersonal deviance, the collapse of marriage and family, or any of that unpleasantness. Just eat your bugs, sleep in your pod, and enjoy the Metaverse. Life sucks. Live an ersatz life instead."

This is not survivable. Not this incident - this incident is essentially meaningless. It is but one star in the constellation of civilizational collapse through which we are living.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (DU+/6)

97 You can do that in virtual? Ah where do you get those goggles? Askin for a friend

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (Irn0L)

98 I think she was comparing it to sexual harassment *on the internet* so words only, such as on Facebook or in a chat or the chat of a game.

And it would be, I think, and made worse because you can't kick the groper in his nutsack or elbow him (or her, to be fair) in the sternum or slap the smug off their face.

But of course it's going to be a thing. Also should be trivially easy to "block" the virtual presence of jerks so that they don't exist to you at all.

Posted by: Synova at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (BD/yx)

99 I love the VR games.
Posted by: megthered at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (sfWd9)

I've only ever played a game called Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes, which is fun.

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (Ez6QX)

100 Every day, life more closely resembles a vignette from "Black Mirror."

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (DU+/6)

101 Imagine the virtual world of Eichenwald.

I first read that as 'the virtual world of Eichmann.'

I don't know what that says about me.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (2JVJo)

102 Gemma's thighs do not despair gropage for they are mighty.

https://tinyurl.com/yfpsyy5p

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (LvTSG)

103 Women as a whole are screwed if tech companies are ever able to offer men a virtual sex experience that approaches the real thing.

I bet all sorts of laws get passed real quick to shut it down for "reasons".

Posted by: Blago at December 27, 2021 04:04 PM (PwNLq)

They're already talking about making sexbots require consent before sex.

Posted by: Mark1971 at December 27, 2021 04:07 PM (xPl2J)

104 90 She's claiming that the fact that this happened in virtual reality, to a completely fake virtual body, makes this "more intense" than if it happened in real life to her real body?

--------

"Everybody knows that the virtual world is more real than reality for us, Luddite H8R!"
Posted by: ShainS -- Beware the Branch Covidians at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (0SFTT)

She watched Amazon's Upload comedy series, which I admit, was really good in its 1st season...

Posted by: Nova local at December 27, 2021 04:07 PM (exHjb)

105 Probably. Isn't that what you would do if you could make yourself look however you wanted?

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:05 PM (Ez6QX)

listen, I could be wrong, but I get the feeling he was referring to the male pee-shee

Posted by: kallisto at December 27, 2021 04:07 PM (DJFLF)

106 65 The groper had the user name David Copafeel

Ophelia Crotch
Posted by: Reuben Hick

Dick Gazinya

Izzy Oner

Posted by: 7man at December 27, 2021 04:07 PM (qwO6y)

107 I was an evil Sims player in my day.

I used cheat codes so I had all the money I'd ever need and could just commence being a jealous and wrathful god full-time.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 27, 2021 04:07 PM (njfCw)

108 I loved how in Tron they didn't even bother trying to explain how it worked. It just did, and now he's in the game. No "quantum Heisenberg shift" pseudo science crap.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at December 27, 2021 04:07 PM (KZzsI)

109 Woman Alleges She Was Groped -- Virtually -- Inside Mark Zuckerberg's "Meta" Virtual World

Ready. Player. One.

Without the charm.

Posted by: Napoleon XIV at December 27, 2021 04:07 PM (AiZBA)

110 insane in real life and insane in virtual reality.

Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:07 PM (X1tGT)

111 I'd hammer that avatar like a hurricane in a screen door.
Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (SH2Zi)

You asked for it:

https://youtu.be/urNyg1ftMIU

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:07 PM (Ez6QX)

112 29 She "thought" she felt something, and that is money in the bank.
Posted by: klaftern at December 27, 2021 03:58 PM (taPSh)

Posted by: Darrell Harris at December 27, 2021 04:08 PM (SI4jX)

113 The groper had the user name David Copafeel
Posted by: Busted can of Biscuits

Uncle Whoseurdaddy

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:08 PM (uXonU)

114 Woman Alleges She Was Groped -- Virtually -- Inside Mark Zuckerberg's "Meta" Virtual World

The system worked.

Posted by: t-bird at December 27, 2021 04:08 PM (1O9Sx)

115 I got nuthin
Posted by: kallisto

"Sometimes nuthin' can be a mighty Cool Hand"

Posted by: JT at December 27, 2021 04:08 PM (arJlL)

116 >> I loved how in Tron they didn't even bother trying to explain how it worked. It just did, and now he's in the game.

Also, they gave us that chick who played Quorra in the crappy sequel.

Posted by: garrett at December 27, 2021 04:08 PM (2JZa6)

117 Meta - enabling the mentally ill to feed their illness!

Posted by: Brad at December 27, 2021 04:08 PM (o3oDL)

118 Flash Gordon just started on Comet TV.

FLASH.........AAAAAAAAA!

Posted by: nurse ratched at December 27, 2021 04:09 PM (U2p+3)

119 Update to the Sims:

Instead of just building things, you plan things out and then spend weeks fighting with contractors to get them to do what you want them to do.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:09 PM (LvTSG)

120 >>They're already talking about making sexbots require consent before sex.

IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE THESE SCREECHING FEMINSTS DON'T GET CONSENT FROM THEIR VIBRATORS.

Posted by: BEN ROETHLISBERGER at December 27, 2021 04:09 PM (URNdm)

121 Can someone 'shop googly eyes on Bidet's VR goggles?

Posted by: kallisto at December 27, 2021 04:09 PM (DJFLF)

122 29 She "thought" she felt something, and that is money in the bank.
Posted by: klaftern at December 27, 2021 03:58 PM (taPSh)

I was going to type 'Schrodinger's Pussycat'.

Posted by: Darrell Harris at December 27, 2021 04:09 PM (SI4jX)

123 Gemma's thighs do not despair gropage for they are mighty.

https://tinyurl.com/yfpsyy5p
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:06 PM (LvTSG)

Damn!
Man killas!

Posted by: Diogenes at December 27, 2021 04:09 PM (axyOa)

124 >>Flash Gordon just started on Comet TV.

Nice.
Just rewired a Flash Gordon and put LEDs in it on Christmas day.

Posted by: garrett at December 27, 2021 04:09 PM (2JZa6)

125 Did she have big virtual breasteseses???

Posted by: Virtual David Alan Grier at December 27, 2021 04:09 PM (ZSK0i)

126 I bet he put his finger all the way up her...

Posted by: Been Lurking, but clearly been posting too at December 27, 2021 04:09 PM (rDgjh)

127 This reminds me of all the Star Trek TNG episodes where the Holodeck would malfunction and cause a chaotic situation. After the third time, any intelligent captain would just unplug the damn thing!

Posted by: Dr. Mabusette at December 27, 2021 04:10 PM (LYL/K)

128 "Sometimes nuthin' can be a mighty Cool Hand"

Posted by: JT at December 27, 2021 04:08 PM (arJlL)

Posted by: kallisto at December 27, 2021 04:10 PM (DJFLF)

129 116 >> I loved how in Tron they didn't even bother trying to explain how it worked. It just did, and now he's in the game.

Also, they gave us that chick who played Quorra in the crappy sequel.
n
Posted by: garrett at December 27, 2021 04:08 PM (2JZa6)

========

1) The TRON movies are straight up fantasy movies in computers. It makes no sense becuase it's not designed to be.
2) Olivia Wilde is a 1, but she is also one of the most obnoxious of the leftist women in Hollywood. Rivals Brie Larson.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:10 PM (LvTSG)

130 Virtual groping is a thing now? I don't even know if I want to try and understand how that works.

Posted by: IC - Joe Biden has shit for brains at December 27, 2021 04:10 PM (Nyumu)

131 Gemma's thighs do not despair gropage for they are mighty.

https://tinyurl.com/yfpsyy5p
Posted by: TheJamesMadison,

Calysta (actually, a hell of a nice gal)

https://is.gd/4eaA4b

Posted by: Tonypete at December 27, 2021 04:10 PM (mD/uy)

132 Or maybe you could 'shop Jared Schmeck's face on Bidet's goggles

Posted by: kallisto at December 27, 2021 04:10 PM (DJFLF)

133 Vivek Sharma, Meta's vice president of Horizon, called the incident "absolutely unfortunate." Meta reviewed the incident and says that the woman did not use certain built-in safety features, including the ability to block users.

--------

Every woman and trans-woman should be equipped with a virtual castrator button.

Posted by: ShainS -- Beware the Branch Covidians at December 27, 2021 04:11 PM (0SFTT)

134 Is it in yet?

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 27, 2021 04:11 PM (4I/2K)

135 127 This reminds me of all the Star Trek TNG episodes where the Holodeck would malfunction and cause a chaotic situation. After the third time, any intelligent captain would just unplug the damn thing!
Posted by: Dr. Mabusette at December 27, 2021 04:10 PM (LYL/K)

And why did the crew have so much free time to LARP in the holodeck anyway? In a real Navy that time would be spent cleaning, training, or running drills.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 27, 2021 04:11 PM (Y5qcH)

136 They're already talking about making sexbots require consent before sex.

First time one declines, on to the junkyard she goes.

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:11 PM (uXonU)

137 A beta tester for Meta's metaverse virtual reality platform Horizon Worlds says she was virtually groped in what may be the first allegation of its kind.

++++

Honey. I was attacked by flying penises back in 2006. It's a rough virtual world out there.

https://is.gd/CCGbuX

Posted by: Ailin Graef at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (QUJVI)

138 Can one not virtually shoot the groper?

Or is it a gun free safe zone?

Oh, well. Call Officer Zuckerboid and let him send a "Sorry Emoji" through a Virtual Social Worker.

Posted by: AnonyBotymousDrivel at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (aXxgO)

139 what do they have against real life?
Posted by: kallisto
Yup. I am interested to see if they can make VR cool. I guess they already have?
I guess a zillion people watch various YT stars play games. So maybe I just do not understand it.
Just seems 100 times more interesting if someone snowboards or skis or, or, versus the virtual version.

Posted by: MikeM at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (X+eRS)

140 >>what do they have against real life? They're all squawking about the environment all the time, well get out there and plant a tree or save a sea turtle or some sheet

I took my niece and nephew out for a boat ride a couple years ago when they were all in their late teens, early 20s. Gorgeous day, not a cloud in the sky, boats everywhere, beautiful scenery.

I turned around to see if they were all having fun in the cockpit and all 3 of them were sitting around the table in the cabin texting their friends.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (ZLI7S)

141 built-in safety features,

Virtual Chastity Belt is right there on the main menu!

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (njfCw)

142 'shop DOCTOR Jill's Face of Shame on the goggles

Posted by: kallisto at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (DJFLF)

143 who could have predicted that meta would create a dysfunctional metaverse?

Posted by: IanDeal at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (nzV7Y)

144 Not that I play VR games or whatever but if there's a chance to be groped by Chris Hemsworth..I might be interested.

Posted by: IC - Joe Biden has shit for brains at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (Nyumu)

145 I'm back.after eating some non virtual food
Yeah!

Posted by: vmom - link to Red's fundraiser at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (tC/iN)

146 Meta reviewed the incident and says that the woman did not use certain built-in safety features, including the ability to block users.

Ya mean cock block?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (Irn0L)

147 Pimpin Muhbitchout

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (Zz0t1)

148 Beyond this being stupid, Vivek Sharma VP of Horizon assumes it happened in reality

Posted by: Skip at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (2JoB8)

149 First, she is a hypersensitive idiot. Second, there is a truism I have noticed in my 29 years, early adopters of technology or users of technology trend toward pron and sexuality. Home video cameras, internet, 888 numbers, video games, etc. This is no surprise someone virtually goosed her.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at December 27, 2021 04:13 PM (coYBh)

150 This reminds me of all the Star Trek TNG episodes where the Holodeck would malfunction and cause a chaotic situation. After the third time, any intelligent captain would just unplug the damn thing!
Posted by: Dr. Mabusette at December 27, 2021 04:10 PM (LYL/K)

And why did the crew have so much free time to LARP in the holodeck anyway? In a real Navy that time would be spent cleaning, training, or running drills.
Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 27, 2021 04:11 PM (Y5qcH)
***

Thats why you never see any enlisted guys in ST, unless they have pendulous...shields.

Posted by: Diogenes at December 27, 2021 04:13 PM (axyOa)

151 Well DUH, everyone knows, the Internet was MADE FOR PORN!

Posted by: Romeo13 at December 27, 2021 04:13 PM (oHd/0)

152 Is it in yet?
Posted by: Count de Monet

In? In VR, it'd be a horse dick. You could see it from two blocks away.

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:13 PM (uXonU)

153 And why did the crew have so much free time to LARP in the holodeck anyway? In a real Navy that time would be spent cleaning, training, or running drills.
Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 27, 2021 04:11 PM (Y5qcH)

Scraping paint off the nacelle.

Posted by: megthered at December 27, 2021 04:13 PM (sfWd9)

154 Posted by: JackStraw at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (ZLI7S)

SO messed up...

Posted by: kallisto at December 27, 2021 04:14 PM (DJFLF)

155
Honey. I was attacked by flying penises back in 2006. It's a rough virtual world out there.

https://is.gd/CCGbuX
Posted by: Ailin Graef at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (QUJVI)

Good lord. Move your mouse over the word 'penises' and see what happens........

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:14 PM (Zz0t1)

156 Meta reviewed the incident and says that the woman did not use certain built-in safety features, including the ability to block users. ...
Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (Irn0L)
++++
I do wonder if it's a whitelist or a blacklist, and where the exceptions are. Ordinarily, I'd want a whitelist - only people on the list can bother me or interact with me.

But then that poses a problem - how do you meet someone? How do you handle introductions? What if you go into a "restaurant" or "golf course" in the Metaverse? Do white and blacklists still apply?

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at December 27, 2021 04:14 PM (5zVb8)

157 Joe with that doodad over his face is an instant classic and hilarious!

Well Done Ace!

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at December 27, 2021 04:14 PM (w9H27)

158 How do we know that she was really a she and not those boffins at Princeton running another scam by pretending to be someone else?

Posted by: Anna Puma at December 27, 2021 04:14 PM (8IV2y)

159 They're already talking about making sexbots require consent before sex.
Posted by: Mark1971

I thought that was one of the problems with them. You could have one programmed to not give consent, and then creepazoids could play out their r-pe fantasies with it.

Posted by: mikeski at December 27, 2021 04:14 PM (P1f+c)

160 How close is living in metaworld to having friends in little grey boxes?

Posted by: yep at December 27, 2021 04:14 PM (uE+or)

161 John Turturo played an FBI agent in the ?first? Transformers movie. Attempted to give the main character, 17, a hard time about his silly R-rated screen name. Turturo wasn't called Binger though.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at December 27, 2021 04:15 PM (44ww/)

162 Can you fart rape in the metaverse?

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 27, 2021 04:15 PM (Y5qcH)

163 First Person Shooter games ... same thing, start arresting all those that shoot people in cyber world. ...

My avatar is just lonely, and you voluptuous avatar was giving me the come hither look ... it was her fault really. Put more clothes on for gosh sake.

Posted by: illiniwek at December 27, 2021 04:15 PM (Cus5s)

164 Ordinarily, I'd want a whitelist - only people on the list can bother me or interact with me.
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!)

Not gonna happen, bucko. Who do you think is funding this?

Posted by: totally not a spammer or robocaller at December 27, 2021 04:16 PM (P1f+c)

165 How close is living in metaworld to having friends in little grey boxes?
Posted by: yep

180 degrees apart. Grey box friends actually meet in meatspace.

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:16 PM (uXonU)

166 Sponge: "I said this when I first heard about it. There will be sexual assaults. There will be virtual police. There will be virtual courts and lawyers."

That's part of the virtual kink. Now you can do all the real life things you wanted to do but never could. Like make yourself a victim and then put imaginary oppressors through the ringer. Fight the Patriarchy and never take to the streets.

So, yeah, this doesn't end well.

Posted by: AnonyBotymousDrivel at December 27, 2021 04:16 PM (aXxgO)

167 138 Can one not virtually shoot the groper?

Or is it a gun free safe zone?

Oh, well. Call Officer Zuckerboid and let him send a "Sorry Emoji" through a Virtual Social Worker.
Posted by: AnonyBotymousDrivel at December 27, 2021 04:12 PM (aXxgO)

Sims 4 has a Goal you can do, where you have to witness the death of someone else... part of a Bad Guy Job. But there are no guns, there are no swords, and you can't kill by magic without modding the game.

So the only way to do it without cheating, is to either make them so mad, they die, OR trap them so they starve to death.

But hey... that is SOOOOO much better... right. /facepalm

Posted by: Romeo13 at December 27, 2021 04:17 PM (oHd/0)

168 Well, if there won't be any college bowl games to watch on NYE day, there's going to be a Godzilla marathon on Comet.

garret, I'd love to see a pic of your rehabbed Flash Gordon machine.

Posted by: nurse ratched at December 27, 2021 04:17 PM (U2p+3)

169 Bigger crime : Virtual groping or saying Let's Go Brandon?

Posted by: steevy at December 27, 2021 04:17 PM (CYnTg)

170 A VR dick?

Look at the pixels!

Posted by: Anna Puma at December 27, 2021 04:17 PM (8IV2y)

171 Gemma's thighs do not despair gropage for they are mighty.

https://tinyurl.com/yfpsyy5p
Posted by: TheJamesMadison,

I would like to see a demonstration of traditional tortilla making technique.

Posted by: El Mikloso at December 27, 2021 04:17 PM (QzkSJ)

172
I am so sick and f*cking tired of king harv that I blocked his domain at my router so I wouldn't click on him by accident anymore.
Posted by: BifBewalski

I had some of his virtual coffee. It's virtually delicious.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at December 27, 2021 04:17 PM (63Dwl)

173 Ok. I'm already sick of it.......virtual sexual assault is JUST AS BAD as REAL physical assault?

WTF?!?

No......it isn't.

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:17 PM (Zz0t1)

174 John Turturo played an FBI agent in the ?first? Transformers movie. Attempted to give the main character, 17, a hard time about his silly R-rated screen name.

Turturo wasn't called Binger though.
Posted by: BourbonChicken

He was called Karen.

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:17 PM (uXonU)

175 voluptuous avatar was giving me the come hither look ... it was her fault really. Put more clothes on for gosh sake.

Posted by: illiniwek at December 27, 2021 04:15 PM (Cus5s)

Are you saying that she virtually asked for it?

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:18 PM (SH2Zi)

176 173 Ok. I'm already sick of it.......virtual sexual assault is JUST AS BAD as REAL physical assault?

WTF?!?

No......it isn't.
Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:17 PM (Zz0t1)

=========

So, when she's assaulted in real life, she'll just call Facebook about it, right? No police.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:18 PM (LvTSG)

177 Someone will be selling the Xray glasses add-on on Meta by next week.

Posted by: GnuBreed at December 27, 2021 04:18 PM (F0YaR)

178 So, yeah, this doesn't end well.
Posted by: AnonyBotymousDrivel at December 27, 2021 04:16 PM (aXxgO)

Alas, like the Krell, the minute Meta opens this up the entire human race will be wiped out in a single day.

Posted by: Napoleon XIV at December 27, 2021 04:18 PM (AiZBA)

179 165 How close is living in metaworld to having friends in little grey boxes?
Posted by: yep

180 degrees apart. Grey box friends actually meet in meatspace.
Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:16 PM (uXonU)

The Horde mind is organic, the total opposite of an artificial intelligence!

Posted by: Romeo13 at December 27, 2021 04:18 PM (oHd/0)

180 Pretty soon we are all going to have probes inserted in us and we will "live" in the Matrix.

I am going to kick Keanu's ass.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 27, 2021 04:19 PM (ZLI7S)

181 That's part of the virtual kink. Now you can do all the real life things you wanted to do but never could. Like make yourself a victim and then put imaginary oppressors through the ringer. Fight the Patriarchy and never take to the streets.

So, yeah, this doesn't end well.
Posted by: AnonyBotymousDrivel

Virtual Avenging Angel Sniper.

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:19 PM (uXonU)

182
This VR world will tend to attract dysfunctional couch dwellers disproportionately; who in turn, are disproportionately angry about how little they have achieved in life, when they stop to think about it.

Posted by: Semi-Literate Thug at December 27, 2021 04:19 PM (6TRw6)

183
Do white and blacklists still apply?
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!)

I'm surprised we're still allowed to use those terms.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at December 27, 2021 04:20 PM (63Dwl)

184 Someone got those goggles for Christmas. We were playing around with them, doing the roller-coaster. It was pretty hilarious, falling on the floor funny. But that's it. I have no interest beyond my initial experience and would never buy them.

Posted by: washrivergal at December 27, 2021 04:20 PM (/3udR)

185 Tanya needs a date with Hayes.

Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:20 PM (X1tGT)

186 I'm surprised we're still allowed to use those terms.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at December 27, 2021 04:20 PM (63Dwl)
++++
Oh, we're not. Every tech company I've worked for or with has an "inclusive language policy" that proscribes certain common technical terms like "whitelist" or "blacklist" or "white hat" or "black hat" or "master" or "slave."

I ignore it.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at December 27, 2021 04:21 PM (NoRxl)

187 Remember that little digression I told you about how the hundred-foot drop looked so convincing? Yeah. Guess what. The virtual groping feels just as real. Of course, you're not physically being touched, just like you're not actually one hundred feet off the ground, but it's still scary as hell.

From another linked article.

Um....No. Dummy. No. It's 'VIRTUAL' you clown. It's NOT REAL.

Dudes can be sick. You're in a VIRTUAL WORLD fercryssakes. Everyone else is sick because the dude that does that shit hates his REAL life, so lives in the virtual one.

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:21 PM (Zz0t1)

188 So the only way to do it without cheating, is to either make them so mad, they die, OR trap them so they starve to death.

But hey... that is SOOOOO much better... right. /facepalm

When I played Sims years ago, I used to trap people in the pool by taking away the steps. They drown. My kids thought it was hilarious. They started coming up with their own ways to kill people.

Posted by: megthered at December 27, 2021 04:21 PM (sfWd9)

189 They're already talking about making sexbots require consent before sex.

This one already got upset about the tester violating its personal space.

https://youtu.be/RiTfe-ckD_g

Posted by: Eisenhorn at December 27, 2021 04:21 PM (9fnEg)

190 Second Life is for fags!

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 27, 2021 04:22 PM (4I/2K)

191 Let's not go to Camelot -- 'tis a silly place.

Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, the Housekeeper at December 27, 2021 04:22 PM (PiwSw)

192 Tanya needs a date with Hayes.
Posted by: Ben Had

Chef or the actual Isaac Hayes?

One is animated, the other would have to be re-animated.

Posted by: Miklos mentions modalities at December 27, 2021 04:22 PM (QzkSJ)

193 Second Life is for fags!
Posted by: Count de Monet at December 27, 2021 04:22 PM (4I/2K)

LOL, forgot all about Second Life.

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:22 PM (Ez6QX)

194
This stupid article appears to be an attempt at a steppingstone to the introduction of thought crime as an accepted legal principle.

Posted by: Semi-Literate Thug at December 27, 2021 04:23 PM (6TRw6)

195 When I played Sims years ago, I used to trap people in the pool by taking away the steps. They drown. My kids thought it was hilarious. They started coming up with their own ways to kill people.
Posted by: megthered at December 27, 2021 04:21 PM (sfWd9)

So, I was the only one who cheated for all the money and then made the mansion of my Sim's dreams so I could almost auto-pilot them to happiness? Man, I guess I was a mom even then...

Posted by: Nova local at December 27, 2021 04:23 PM (exHjb)

196
When I played Sims years ago, I used to trap people in the pool by taking away the steps. They drown. My kids thought it was hilarious. They started coming up with their own ways to kill people.
Posted by: megthered at December 27, 2021 04:21 PM (sfWd9)

I got roped into watching some YT vid where a guy was basically torturing the sims by removing the toilets and killing the power so the food would rot. They actually got all sick and started dying in the house.

I couldn't turn it off.....

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:23 PM (Zz0t1)

197 Was the meta world harassment victim wearing clothes during the incident? Just trying to get a full picture of what happened.

Posted by: Bang-a-gong at December 27, 2021 04:23 PM (Qc+Wp)

198 My favorite Sims death was to put them in a 2x1 room with a toilet and no doors.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:23 PM (LvTSG)

199 Did she piss and crap herself to get him to stop?

Posted by: t-dubya-d at December 27, 2021 04:24 PM (UGun5)

200 These people pour gasoline on themselves, run into the forest fire and are shocked they got burned.

Posted by: Some Rat at December 27, 2021 04:24 PM (r1z5A)

201 Miklos, the Hayes that is sure the military is gonna kill Santa.

Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:24 PM (X1tGT)

202 198 My favorite Sims death was to put them in a 2x1 room with a toilet and no doors.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:23 PM (LvTSG)

Surround with Barbeques, then a fire spell.

Posted by: Romeo13 at December 27, 2021 04:24 PM (oHd/0)

203 We live in an insane asylum....

Posted by: sven at December 27, 2021 04:25 PM (Lzpvj)

204 Is there spanking in the metauniverse?

Asking for a friend.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:25 PM (L9/32)

205 Don't know if I can take anymore of clown world.

Posted by: Cheri at December 27, 2021 04:25 PM (oiNtH)

206 Everyone else is sick because the dude that does that shit hates his REAL life, so lives in the virtual one.

I suspect I would be just as unhappy in a virtual life as in this real one. I don't need to go out of my way to torture myself.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 27, 2021 04:25 PM (2JVJo)

207 If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?

Posted by: Brandon at December 27, 2021 04:25 PM (DiE0p)

208 This story is the reason why I drink.

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:25 PM (Zz0t1)

209 the Hayes that is sure the military is gonna kill Santa.
Posted by: Ben Had

The Russian military if the sleigh is flagged in Malaysia?

Posted by: Miklos is a bit slow (but will drink faster) at December 27, 2021 04:26 PM (QzkSJ)

210 I would not be surprised if pedos use VR to make kiddie avatars that have virtual sex with each other

Posted by: vmom - link to Red's fundraiser at December 27, 2021 04:26 PM (tC/iN)

211 When I played Sims years ago, I used to trap people in the pool by taking away the steps. They drown. My kids thought it was hilarious. They started coming up with their own ways to kill people.
Posted by: megthered at December 27, 2021 04:21 PM (sfWd9)

That sounds like something Josh would do in Let's Game it Out...

Posted by: Virtual David Alan Grier at December 27, 2021 04:26 PM (ZSK0i)

212 Is there spanking in the metauniverse?

Asking for a friend.
Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:25 PM (L9/32)

Ass spanking or monkey spanking?

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:26 PM (Ez6QX)

213 Is there spanking in the metauniverse?

Asking for a friend.
Posted by: Marcus T

Please post answer. Your friend.

Posted by: Some Rat at December 27, 2021 04:26 PM (r1z5A)

214 Programmer:

*looks left*
*looks right*
We made the knockers feel exactly like bags of sand.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at December 27, 2021 04:26 PM (44ww/)

215 They should just play the bowl games with all COVID positive players

Posted by: steevy at December 27, 2021 04:26 PM (CYnTg)

216 214 Programmer:

*looks left*
*looks right*
We made the knockers feel exactly like bags of sand.
Posted by: BourbonChicken at December 27, 2021 04:26 PM (44ww/)

========

I understood this reference.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:27 PM (LvTSG)

217 I am going to go out on a limb here, but this did not happen. It has happened in the META because guys are guys. But it did not happen to this chick.

Posted by: Picric at December 27, 2021 04:27 PM (13tTk)

218 "Ass spanking or monkey spanking?
Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:26 PM (Ez6QX)"

Ass spanking. Why do you ask?

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:27 PM (L9/32)

219 >What a stupid time to be alive
Posted by: It's me donna at December 27, 2021 03:58 PM (TdaKq)

You beat me to it.

Here Horde, have a Doomer Wojack story about living in the Metaverse:
https://youtu.be/lng9u26JAvk

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at December 27, 2021 04:27 PM (cSs/W)

220 212 Is there spanking in the metauniverse?

Asking for a friend.
Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:25 PM (L9/32)

Ass spanking or monkey spanking?
Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:26 PM (Ez6QX)

And the latest update comes with Castle Anthrax, and Naughty Naughty Zoot.

Posted by: Romeo13 at December 27, 2021 04:27 PM (oHd/0)

221 Is there an entry fee into this pseudoverse?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (63Dwl)

222 Ass spanking or monkey spanking?

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:26 PM (Ez6QX)

Yes.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (SH2Zi)

223 Ass spanking. Why do you ask?
Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:27 PM (L9/32)

I think ass spanking will cost you extra.

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (Ez6QX)

224 This VR world will tend to attract dysfunctional couch dwellers disproportionately; who in turn, are disproportionately angry about how little they have achieved in life, when they stop to think about it.
Posted by: Semi-Literate Thug at December 27, 2021 04:19 PM (6TRw6)

Thats probably true. I enjoy video games, I have every console, a gaming laptop with Steam, Epic and GOG games, Nintendo Switch and will be getting the Steam Deck when it comes out. I just don't have the time to play them. I usually plug one in after everyone is in bed. But there are people, mostly kids, who are allowed to play as much as they want. That is wrong, wrong, wrong. Our kids got two hours for gaming and usually didn't go two full hours.

Posted by: megthered at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (sfWd9)

225 They should just play the bowl games with all COVID positive players
Posted by: steevy

Let's talk.

Posted by: NCAA watching money drain away at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (r1z5A)

226 221 Is there an entry fee into this pseudoverse?
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (63Dwl)

Only your dignity.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (UuD2k)

227 Hi Rat!

It's cold af out here.
Snow and ice on the beach.
Wind out of the north.

Brrrrrrr

Posted by: nurse ratched at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (U2p+3)

228 We're all Leisure Suit Larrys in VR world.

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (4I/2K)

229 "I think ass spanking will cost you extra.
Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (Ez6QX)"

I have cash, gold and Bitcoin.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:29 PM (L9/32)

230 How much is a virtual handy?

Posted by: Dr Spank at December 27, 2021 04:29 PM (BORqa)

231
Subliminal advertising is illegal.

What about Subliminal Propaganda?

With Meta you're 360* within Zucky Ducky Doo's visually and aural controlled world.

Given what we've seen, you gotta expect that Meta is going to be both an Obvious and more sinisterly a

360* Subliminal Propaganda and Brainwashing medium.

Nice!l

Posted by: naturalfake at December 27, 2021 04:29 PM (OMayC)

232 223 Ass spanking. Why do you ask?
Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:27 PM (L9/32)

I think ass spanking will cost you extra.
Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (Ez6QX)

That update will cost you $20...

Same as in town...

Posted by: Romeo13 at December 27, 2021 04:29 PM (oHd/0)

233 I had no idea Sims game was a Psyco Survivor gamelan one alive wins.

Posted by: Skip at December 27, 2021 04:29 PM (2JoB8)

234 221 Is there an entry fee into this pseudoverse?
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (63Dwl)

Your brain and your soul...

Posted by: Nova local at December 27, 2021 04:29 PM (exHjb)

235 >>How much is a virtual handy?

$20, same as in Toon Town.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 27, 2021 04:30 PM (URNdm)

236 They should just play the bowl games with all COVID positive players
Posted by: steevy

Keep the regular games, then add some new ones for that. The Kleenex Bowl, Pfizer Bowl, Moderna Bowl, some company that makes ventilators but I'm too lazy to look them up Bowl.....

Posted by: mikeski at December 27, 2021 04:30 PM (P1f+c)

237 Sorry friends, I'm being indicted for Capital War Crimes for nuking my neighbors recently in a Civ VI game. Literally worse than Hitler.

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at December 27, 2021 04:30 PM (cSs/W)

238 Willowed from last thread:
If I were a college football player supposedly headed to a bowl game, and I tested negative for Coof, and my team backed out, I'd be pissed. And if I were a star player, I'd let the coach know I was transferring to a school with balls.

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:30 PM (uXonU)

239 It's cold af out here.
Snow and ice on the beach.
Wind out of the north.

Brrrrrrr
Posted by: nurse ratched at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (U2p+3)

Son had a not-fun day yesterday. Apparently SeaTac doesn't know WTF to do when it snows.

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:30 PM (Ez6QX)

240 228 We're all Leisure Suit Larrys in VR world.
Posted by: Count de Monet at December 27, 2021 04:28 PM (4I/2K)

LOL, had not thought of that game in YEARS.

Posted by: Romeo13 at December 27, 2021 04:30 PM (oHd/0)

241 This bikini brunette finds the idea of the "metaverse" to be spooky, off-putting and unsettling:
https://is.gd/sByatg

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at December 27, 2021 04:30 PM (NoRxl)

242 >>How much is a virtual handy?

$20, same as in Toon Town.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 27, 2021 04:30 PM (URNdm)

Disneyland is really upping their game!

Posted by: CNN at December 27, 2021 04:30 PM (SH2Zi)

243 237 Sorry friends, I'm being indicted for Capital War Crimes for nuking my neighbors recently in a Civ VI game. Literally worse than Hitler.
Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at December 27, 2021 04:30 PM (cSs/W)

Your mistake was leaving enough of them alive to hold a trial.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 27, 2021 04:31 PM (UuD2k)

244 It's cold af out here.
Snow and ice on the beach.
Wind out of the north.

Brrrrrrr
Posted by: nurse ratched

Yeppers! Thinking my attic needs a little more insulation, starting to get javelin icicles.

Posted by: NCAA watching money drain away at December 27, 2021 04:31 PM (r1z5A)

245 So, tea-bagging her after a head shot with the hand cannon is right out?

Game is nerfed for newbs.

Posted by: Lrrr at December 27, 2021 04:31 PM (xCjpF)

246 Can't wait to visit.

Posted by: OJ at December 27, 2021 04:32 PM (lofjn)

247 Yeppers! Thinking my attic needs a little more insulation, starting to get javelin icicles.
Posted by: NCAA watching money drain away at December 27, 2021 04:31 PM (r1z5A)

You'll shoot your eye out!

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 27, 2021 04:32 PM (4I/2K)

248 Disneyland is really upping their game!
Posted by: CNN

We've upped our game, so up yours!

No, literally. Virtually literally.

Posted by: mikeski at December 27, 2021 04:32 PM (P1f+c)

249 Might be mentioned above - but I saw somebody comment on this that every time they play Halo they get teabagged by other players after they've been shot for 10 years.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 27, 2021 04:32 PM (wAnMi)

250 238 Willowed from last thread:
If I were a college football player supposedly headed to a bowl game, and I tested negative for Coof, and my team backed out, I'd be pissed. And if I were a star player, I'd let the coach know I was transferring to a school with balls.
Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:30 PM (uXonU)

I don't think most of them want to play, since only the final 4 team bowls matter...especially if their bowls are in the cold, snow, and crappy tourist areas (Vegas bowl - yeah, seniors wanna be there, Detroit area bowl this year - maybe not)...

Posted by: Nova local at December 27, 2021 04:32 PM (exHjb)

251 Son had a not-fun day yesterday. Apparently SeaTac doesn't know WTF to do when it snows.
Posted by: Jordan61

Yeah. It's pretty stupid. Glad I traveled last Christmas and not this year.

It really is colder than a well digger's ass in January.

Posted by: nurse ratched at December 27, 2021 04:32 PM (U2p+3)

252 In my defense, I got PTSD from the time that pussyslayer69 teabagged me in a Blood Gulch match.

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at December 27, 2021 04:33 PM (cSs/W)

253 Off sock.

Posted by: Some Rat at December 27, 2021 04:33 PM (r1z5A)

254 249 Might be mentioned above - but I saw somebody comment on this that every time they play Halo they get teabagged by other players after they've been shot for 10 years.
Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 27, 2021 04:32 PM (wAnMi)

=========

To be fair, 10 years is a long time to wait to respawn.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:33 PM (LvTSG)

255 I could shoot her again...and again...

Posted by: Alec Baldwin at December 27, 2021 04:33 PM (lofjn)

256 This could be a real boon for lonely girls.

Posted by: Caliban at December 27, 2021 04:33 PM (uv74r)

257 I thought I was in virtual world!

Posted by: Phil Spector at December 27, 2021 04:34 PM (lofjn)

258 257 Happy kwanzaa everyone! It starts today.
Posted by: raimondo at December 27, 2021 04:33 PM (SNO9j)

========

I'll box you for saying that.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:34 PM (LvTSG)

259 This could be a real boon for lonely girls.

Posted by: Caliban at December 27, 2021 04:33 PM (uv74r)

Liv-ing in a vir-tu-al world. Vir-tu-al-al.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:35 PM (SH2Zi)

260 OK, granddaughter just called....no water in back bathroom. Let the fun begin. Be back, don't know when!

Posted by: Some Rat at December 27, 2021 04:35 PM (r1z5A)

261 My butt's been wiped in virtual world.

Posted by: Brandon at December 27, 2021 04:35 PM (lofjn)

262 Whatever happened to Raimondo?

Posted by: N.L. Urker, the Phillips screwdriver of the gods at December 27, 2021 04:35 PM (eGTCV)

263 >>Happy kwanzaa everyone! It starts today.

So does Purge.

run

Posted by: JackStraw at December 27, 2021 04:35 PM (ZLI7S)

264 Posted by: raimondo at December 27, 2021 04:33 PM (SNO9j)

You DICK!!!!

Posted by: Jeff Spicoli at December 27, 2021 04:35 PM (Zz0t1)

265 This used to happen in the '80s.

"You are about to be groped by a Grue"

Posted by: Muldoon at December 27, 2021 04:36 PM (m45I2)

266 Stop the world and let me off.

Posted by: SOMEASSHOLESTOLEMYPEN at December 27, 2021 04:36 PM (ytSiK)

267 Does anybody actually celebrate kwanzaa?

Posted by: vmom - link to Red's fundraiser at December 27, 2021 04:37 PM (tC/iN)

268 Remember the 90s, when the promise of the internet and virtual worlds was to free us from the bullshit of daily life?

Now that it's a reality in 2022, it's a Woke Enforcement Simulator. Best of all possible timelines, this is.

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at December 27, 2021 04:37 PM (cSs/W)

269 For what it's worth, there was no groping on the Oregon Trail.

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:37 PM (Zz0t1)

270 She is going to hate the virtual surprise anal then

Posted by: Y5 at December 27, 2021 04:37 PM (Mtn20)

271 What do you get when you combine Kwanzaa with virtual groping?

Posted by: Caliban at December 27, 2021 04:37 PM (uv74r)

272 268 Does anybody actually celebrate kwanzaa?
Posted by: vmom - link to Red's fundraiser at December 27, 2021 04:37 PM (tC/iN)

Only phony politicians. Strangely, most of them are white.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 27, 2021 04:38 PM (UuD2k)

273 Posted by: raimondo at December 27, 2021 04:33 PM (SNO9j)

Happy beat-your-girlfriend day to you, too.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 27, 2021 04:38 PM (P3gRi)

274 When you hear a Mojo Nixon soundtrack in your VR Metaverse, you just might be in a Redneck Rampage.
https://youtu.be/s8HBYFDHY8k

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 27, 2021 04:38 PM (4I/2K)

275 Madonna's Material Girl comes to life.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at December 27, 2021 04:38 PM (BFigT)

276 Here Horde, have a Doomer Wojack story about living in the Metaverse:
https://youtu.be/lng9u26JAvk
Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at December 27, 2021 04:27 PM (cSs/W)
++++
Other than the fact that he has a job, that strikes me as inside the realm of possibility.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at December 27, 2021 04:38 PM (NoRxl)

277 Especially when they distribute the fire hydrant seized virtual dicks

Posted by: Y5 at December 27, 2021 04:38 PM (Mtn20)

278 Wasn't that how they got it on in demolition man? That was more neural iirc. Zuckworld they can get their pedo on

Posted by: A dude in MI at December 27, 2021 04:38 PM (/6GbT)

279 Next thing is everyone will have touch sensors on all the naughty parts. Of course just to make sure they were groped. Or science

Posted by: SOMEASSHOLESTOLEMYPEN at December 27, 2021 04:38 PM (ytSiK)

280 JBLM is the worst place on the planet to travel in/out of when the weather is bad.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:39 PM (L9/32)

281 Just remember that hot, busty redhead you are groping could well be an unemployed trucker from Oregon who hasn't bathed in a month.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 27, 2021 04:39 PM (dNqv+)

282 Reportedly designed so there can be up to 20 people at a time in a virtual space.

Eh. What if that up to 20 participants morphs into 20 virtual lions, snakes, sharks? Like a bad trip, seems like panic attacks, or worse, would be waiting to happen.

Posted by: Lola at December 27, 2021 04:39 PM (VQp1G)

283 Go to Italy , get grouped for real and the food is better.

Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:39 PM (X1tGT)

284 What do you get when you combine Kwanzaa with virtual groping?
Posted by: Caliban

Kamala

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:39 PM (uXonU)

285 268 Does anybody actually celebrate kwanzaa?

Posted by: vmom - link to Red's fundraiser at December 27, 2021 04:37 PM (tC/iN)

Yes. Blacks who believe blacks are better than whites.

Posted by: Gref at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (AMIL/)

286 What do you get when you combine Kwanzaa with virtual groping?

Two words

Virtual clitorctomies

Posted by: Y5 at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (Mtn20)

287 My metagiveafuckmeter is still pegged at 0.000 milliquatroons.

Posted by: The Man from Athens at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (QMwOT)

288 235 >>How much is a virtual handy?

$20, same as in Toon Town.

Posted by: Lizzy

$20? WTF? That better include a reach around or some balloons.

Posted by: Dr Spank at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (BORqa)

289 This whole thread really needs a link to the "Internet is for Porn" animation from fifteen years ago.

Posted by: Thing From Snowy Mountain, Cryptid Anarchist at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (eVr1H)

290 Kwanza...Hey why not, people who drink malt liquor need a holiday too.

Posted by: Brandon at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (DiE0p)

291 279 Wasn't that how they got it on in demolition man? That was more neural iirc. Zuckworld they can get their pedo on
Posted by: A dude in MI at December 27, 2021 04:38 PM (/6GbT)

That scene is always hilarious to me. She hands him a towel before they begin.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (dNqv+)

292 >>Happy kwanzaa everyone! It starts today.

Chicago kicked it off with 22 shootings.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (SH2Zi)

293 284 Go to Italy , get grouped for real and the food is better.
Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:39 PM (X1tGT)

=========

It is my experience that the Italians are very bad at grouping people. They just don't have the desire for that kind of organization.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (LvTSG)

294 Oh, we're not. Every tech company I've worked for or with has an "inclusive language policy" that proscribes certain common technical terms like "whitelist" or "blacklist" or "white hat" or "black hat" or "master" or "slave."

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at December 27, 2021 04:21 PM

My company this past year started to use the word "diversity" to describe when we do not have common parts across vehicle platforms. The goal is to have as much commonality as possible. Which means that "diversity" is bad.

Should have heard my supervisors rolling out this new initiative and falling over themselves trying to explain that the company is not against diversity as we traditionally know it with regards to employees, just against diversity of components.

Posted by: Clyde Shelton at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (Do5/p)

295 hahaha

Worse, maybe she is really a he identifying in Meta as a she, and xer liked it!

Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (rxDDN)

296 >Just remember that hot, busty redhead you are groping could well be an unemployed trucker from Oregon who hasn't bathed in a month.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 27, 2021 04:39 PM (dNqv+)

Yeah, that's basically in the video that I posted above.

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at December 27, 2021 04:41 PM (cSs/W)

297 Does anybody actually celebrate kwanzaa?
Posted by: vmom

White elementary school teachers.

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:41 PM (uXonU)

298 "$20? WTF? That better include a reach around or some balloons.
Posted by: Dr Spank at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (BORqa)"

Close. You get half a Slurpee.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:41 PM (L9/32)

299 This could be a real boon for lonely girls.

Posted by: Caliban at December 27, 2021 04:33 PM (uv74r)

Liv-ing in a vir-tu-al world. Vir-tu-al-al.
Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:35 PM (SH2Zi)

You just know that every foxy woman you meet is going to be a 300 lb guy named Stu, and if you happen to meet somebody claiming to be a guy it's going to be a dyke. Everybody else is going to be a fucking furry or a brony.

And after your first visit to your "virtual office" you'll be updating your resume the next day. Especially if you work at FB.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at December 27, 2021 04:41 PM (wAnMi)

300 $20? WTF? That better include a reach around or some balloons.

Posted by: Dr Spank at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (BORqa)

Brandon did that.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:41 PM (SH2Zi)

301 $20? WTF? That better include a reach around or some balloons.

Posted by: Dr Spank at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (BORqa)

Inflation. You'll get a picture of a reach around and LIKE IT.

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:42 PM (Zz0t1)

302 What was the virtual world where they had the flying dick thingies

Posted by: Y5 at December 27, 2021 04:42 PM (Mtn20)

303 I have goggles for my drone. Guarantee I can make you feel queasy while you're sitting down.
It's odd. I still can't stand it for long.

Posted by: MkY at December 27, 2021 04:42 PM (uqdlV)

304 I thought Japan was the center of the groping world. They have separate female only cars.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 27, 2021 04:42 PM (dNqv+)

305 Hell, for $20 it should be a balloon animal, or some sort of puppet.

Posted by: Dr Spank at December 27, 2021 04:43 PM (BORqa)

306 My network manager in our office was wiring some new cable in and using an outside contractor to help and before they got started, the contractor very formally asked if it was OK to refer to certain connections as "male" and others as "female". You know, like contractors have done since the dawn of time.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 27, 2021 04:43 PM (rxDDN)

307 LOL

Can they smell my finger, too?

Posted by: anchorbabe fashion cop at December 27, 2021 04:43 PM (ufFY8)

308 How much is a virtual handy?

$20, same as in Toon Town.

Posted by: Lizzy

$20? WTF? That better include a reach around or some balloons.
Posted by: Dr Spank at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (BORqa)

I might be unclear as to the definition of a reach-around...

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:43 PM (Ez6QX)

309 In fairness there is no way hot chicks would ever hang in some virtual world.

Why would they, the are hot here.

Posted by: Y5 at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (Mtn20)

310 What was the virtual world where they had the flying dick thingies
Posted by: Y5 at December 27, 2021 04:42 PM (Mtn20)

Anshe Chung was the avatar someone posted about upthread.

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (Zz0t1)

311 TJM, I sure screwed that one up.

Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (X1tGT)

312 "Hell, for $20 it should be a balloon animal, or some sort of puppet.
Posted by: Dr Spank at December 27, 2021 04:43 PM (BORqa)"

The first part already includes a hand puppet of your choice.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (L9/32)

313 How many days until the Metaverse has its first mass shooting?

Posted by: Roy at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (Ti+Tv)

314 David Lister has been doing this and worse since the late 1980s on virtual reality.

You Red Dwarfers know what I am talking about.

Posted by: Kryton at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (QMwOT)

315 I might be unclear as to the definition of a reach-around...

Posted by: Jordan61

It's exactly what you think it is.

Posted by: Dr Spank at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (BORqa)

316 307 LOL

Can they smell my finger, too?

Posted by: anchorbabe fashion cop at December 27, 2021 04:43 PM (ufFY

I really hope that was intended to have a Don Lemon sock. Lol.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (dNqv+)

317 >>$20? WTF? That better include a reach around or some balloons.

He'll be wearing the balloon.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (ZLI7S)

318
I might be unclear as to the definition of a reach-around...
Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:43 PM (Ez6QX)

I got this.....

Posted by: Urban Dictionary at December 27, 2021 04:45 PM (Zz0t1)

319 311 TJM, I sure screwed that one up.
Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (X1tGT)

=========

It is true, the Italian male is a very handsy individual on average. I heard many stories from the girls I knew in Italy.

They just don't organize well except to scream at each other in soccer stadiums.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:45 PM (LvTSG)

320 This broad is completely batshit fucking crazy.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. at December 27, 2021 04:45 PM (II3Gr)

321 a balloon animal, or some sort of puppet

Puppets, fine. But not Muppets. Muppets chafe.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 27, 2021 04:45 PM (njfCw)

322 The CNN part of the plaza is where the Minor Attracted Perverts go in virtual world, and they call the girls college "Tapper" University.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 27, 2021 04:45 PM (rxDDN)

323 It's exactly what you think it is.
Posted by: Dr Spank at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (BORqa)

I mean, you're already getting a handy.

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:46 PM (Ez6QX)

324 Get Grope-Alert now! You may be getting groped, and not even know about it! Even if you are dead!!! Especially if you are dead.

Grope-Alert puts tiny sensors on all your gropeable body parts, and conveys real-time date via cellular links to our vast Grope-Alert data center, where trained Gropealysts interpret the data (and post the juicy stuff to PronHub). We can then dispatch trained Gropervenors to your side within virtual minutes, to protect you assets.

Trust me. I know this shit.

Posted by: zombie Jeffery Epstein, who did not kill himself at December 27, 2021 04:46 PM (P3gRi)

325 We'll scream at it for $5.

Posted by: Toontown at December 27, 2021 04:46 PM (BORqa)

326 a balloon animal, or some sort of puppet

Puppets, fine. But not Muppets. Muppets chafe.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 27, 2021 04:45 PM (njfCw)

What you were looking for was a Muffet.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:46 PM (SH2Zi)

327 This thread is headed nowhere good. I can sense it.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:46 PM (L9/32)

328 323 It's exactly what you think it is.
Posted by: Dr Spank at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (BORqa)

I mean, you're already getting a handy.
Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:46 PM (Ez6QX)

One virtual, one real?

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. at December 27, 2021 04:47 PM (II3Gr)

329 326 What you were looking for was a Muffet.

No whey!

Posted by: Guy Smiley at December 27, 2021 04:47 PM (njfCw)

330 327 This thread is headed nowhere good. I can sense it.
Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:46 PM (L9/32)

=========

It's those swarthy Italian men, isn't it?

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:47 PM (LvTSG)

331 AoSHQ virtual world is going to look like San Francisco, overrun by big fat Hobos, except ammo stores are on every corner right next to the Chinese restaurants.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (rxDDN)

332 Just remember that hot, busty redhead you are groping could well be an unemployed trucker from Oregon who hasn't bathed in a month.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 27, 2021 04:39 PM

Or like the woman at the end of our music video for Sweet Emotion.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=82cJgPXU-ik&t=260s

Posted by: Aerosmith at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (Do5/p)

333 The CNN part of the plaza is where the Minor Attracted Perverts go in virtual world, and they call the girls college "Tapper" University.
Posted by: Huck Follywood

Tappa Tappa Yew Fraternity.

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (uXonU)

334 AoSHQ virtual world is going to look like San Francisco, overrun by big fat Hobos, except ammo stores are on every corner right next to the Chinese restaurants.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (rxDDN)

And large tracts of bare land.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (SH2Zi)

335 It's those swarthy Italian men, isn't it?
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:47 PM (LvTSG)

Hey! Are we not men? If you prick us, do we not call you a fucking cocksucking piece of shit?

Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (dNqv+)

336 This reminds me of all the Star Trek TNG episodes where the Holodeck would malfunction and cause a chaotic situation. After the third time, any intelligent captain would just unplug the damn thing!
Posted by: Dr. Mabusette at December 27, 2021 04:10 PM (LYL/K)

The fact that a military vessel wasted space and energy on that, AND that somehow it could take control of the actual ship was one of the many things that killed TNG for me when it came out.

And even though I nicknamed it "The Love Boat" because it had a female "Cruise Director" and black Bartender and a bald captain, it IS a military vessel . Princess cruise ships don't have working weapons that can destroy a world like starships do.

Posted by: Oldcat at December 27, 2021 04:49 PM (eoQWY)

337 331 AoSHQ virtual world is going to look like San Francisco, overrun by big fat Hobos, except ammo stores are on every corner right next to the Chinese restaurants.
Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (rxDDN)

=========

Incorrect.

A bevy of heavily armed 29 year olds (well, almost 29), using a large armory to hunt down hobos as sacrifices to the boss ewok who accidentally turns the entire place red about once a week.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:49 PM (LvTSG)

338 AoSHQ virtual world is going to look like San Francisco, overrun by big fat Hobos, except ammo stores are on every corner right next to the Chinese restaurants.
Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (rxDDN)

It'll be virtual avitars commenting on how fked up meta is.

Posted by: weirdflunky at December 27, 2021 04:49 PM (cknjq)

339 What do I gotta do to groped by some guy in real life?!

A good feel up followed by a little spanking and a good, hard shag.

Who do I gotta blow?

Fucking Libtard Beta male pussies.

Posted by: Single 42 Year Old Liberal Woman at December 27, 2021 04:50 PM (QMwOT)

340 Are there any Men's rooms in the Metaverse?

Posted by: Cory Booker at December 27, 2021 04:50 PM (DiE0p)

341 335 It's those swarthy Italian men, isn't it?
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:47 PM (LvTSG)

Hey! Are we not men? If you prick us, do we not call you a fucking cocksucking piece of shit?
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (dNqv+)

==========

Va' fa' un culo.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:50 PM (LvTSG)

342 >>>Just remember that hot, busty redhead you are groping could well be an unemployed trucker from Oregon who hasn't bathed in a month.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 27, 2021 04:39 PM (dNqv+)

===

Aka: The Hot Troll Deviation

Posted by: Turn Two at December 27, 2021 04:50 PM (e4JXb)

343 "It's those swarthy Italian men, isn't it?
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:47 PM (LvTSG)"

Yes. Did I mention I'm a 6 foot Italian guy with a Mohawk who looks like an extra from Last of the Mohicans?

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:50 PM (L9/32)

344 286 268 Does anybody actually celebrate kwanzaa?
Posted by: vmom - link to Red's fundraiser at December 27, 2021 04:37 PM (tC/iN)
Yes. Blacks who believe blacks are better than whites.
Posted by: Gref at December 27, 2021 04:40 PM (AMIL/)

-----------------------------------------
Yup. Philadelphia & surrounding areas do. Boathouse Row, Sesame Place, Franklin Square, The African American Museum, and more, have numerous programs and are lit up in celebration.

Posted by: Lola at December 27, 2021 04:50 PM (VQp1G)

345 AoSHQ virtual world is going to look like San Francisco, overrun by big fat Hobos, except ammo stores are on every corner right next to the Chinese restaurants.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (rxDDN)

And large tracts of bare land.
Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (SH2Zi)

An AOSHQ virtual world would have us in our own rooms, reading grey rectangles with words on them, then writing hastily on one and throwing them into the output bucket.

Posted by: Oldcat at December 27, 2021 04:50 PM (eoQWY)

346 Princess cruise ships don't have working weapons that can destroy a world

That's what you think!

Posted by: Princess Cruise Line at December 27, 2021 04:51 PM (I2/tG)

347 339 What do I gotta do to groped by some guy in real life?!

A good feel up followed by a little spanking and a good, hard shag.

Who do I gotta blow?

Fucking Libtard Beta male pussies.
Posted by: Single 42 Year Old Liberal Woman at December 27, 2021 04:50 PM (QMwOT)

Lose the liberalism and about 100 pounds. Your odds will improve exponentially.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. at December 27, 2021 04:51 PM (II3Gr)

348 Yup. Philadelphia & surrounding areas do. Boathouse Row, Sesame Place, Franklin Square, The African American Museum, and more, have numerous programs and are lit up in celebration.

it's pretty big here b/c the weirdo murderer guy who created it was from here

we're very loyal even to guys who kill their girlfriends and stuff them in trunks.

hey Ira you maniac! you still our homie

Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 04:51 PM (j9HX3)

349 I really hope that was intended to have a Don Lemon sock. Lol.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 27, 2021 04:44 PM (dNqv+)

Yes, that is much funnier!

Posted by: anchorbabe fashion cop at December 27, 2021 04:52 PM (ufFY8)

350 This post has triggered my PTSD over the one time my Ugandan Knuckles avatar, endowed with extra large breasts, was assaulted repeatedly in the lobby of VR Chat by a mob of anime avatars.

I'm literally shaking right now, I can't even.

Posted by: Eric in Atlanta at December 27, 2021 04:52 PM (xfP4L)

351 What do I gotta do to groped by some guy in real life?!

A good feel up followed by a little spanking and a good, hard shag.

Who do I gotta blow?

Fucking Libtard Beta male pussies.
Posted by: Single 42 Year Old Liberal Woman at December 27, 2021 04:50 PM (QMwOT)

**makes telephone gesture**

Call me.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 27, 2021 04:52 PM (2JVJo)

352 Every tranny will be hanging out in the Metaverse 24x7.

Posted by: The Future! at December 27, 2021 04:52 PM (I2/tG)

353 Just remember that hot, busty redhead you are groping could well be an unemployed trucker from Oregon who hasn't bathed in a month.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 27, 2021 04:39 PM

Or like the woman at the end of our music video for Sweet Emotion.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=82cJgPXU-ik&t=260s
Posted by: Aerosmith at December 27, 2021 04:48 PM (Do5/p)

I understood this reference.

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 27, 2021 04:52 PM (4I/2K)

354 350 This post has triggered my PTSD over the one time my Ugandan Knuckles avatar, endowed with extra large breasts, was assaulted repeatedly in the lobby of VR Chat by a mob of anime avatars.

I'm literally shaking right now, I can't even.
Posted by: Eric in Atlanta at December 27, 2021 04:52 PM (xfP4L)

But do you know dee wey?

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. at December 27, 2021 04:52 PM (II3Gr)

355 Way back when, I liked the original sim city where you actually build the city. Once they came out with sim people, I had no interest. I try to stay away from people.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at December 27, 2021 04:53 PM (coYBh)

356 lol oh wait! different psycho - that's whatever Earth Day?

kwanzaa was another dude, probably not from philly

philly always celebrates stupid things in weird ways tho - it's our jam

THAT SAID

I'm sure the Mummers Parade isn't happening. I don't even care to look!

Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 04:53 PM (j9HX3)

357 Incorrect.

A bevy of heavily armed 29 year olds (well, almost 29), using a large armory to hunt down hobos as sacrifices to the boss ewok who accidentally turns the entire place red about once a week.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:49 PM (LvTSG)
===========
That's why we have lots of hobos and ammo stores, to reload often and hunt.

But I will add one thing: AoSHQ will be governed by busty lesbian pron stars from an earlier age

Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 27, 2021 04:53 PM (rxDDN)

358 Just remember that hot, busty redhead you are groping could well be an unemployed trucker from Oregon who hasn't bathed in a month.
Posted by: Aetius451AD

EVERY SATURDAY

Posted by: Reasonably Hygienic Miklos at December 27, 2021 04:54 PM (QzkSJ)

359 Way back when, I liked the original sim city where you actually build the city.
----------
I was cruel to my subjects. I made them all live where they work.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea at December 27, 2021 04:54 PM (DnWKq)

360 What's the point of a make believe fantasy reality world if it's just going to be full of women complaining and ruining everything like the real world?

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at December 27, 2021 04:55 PM (5We2S)

361
EVERY SATURDAY
Posted by: Reasonably Hygienic Miklos at December 27, 2021 04:54 PM (QzkSJ)

Whether you need it or not.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. at December 27, 2021 04:55 PM (II3Gr)

362 And even though I nicknamed it "The Love Boat" because it had a female "Cruise Director" and black Bartender and a bald captain, it IS a military vessel . Princess cruise ships don't have working weapons that can destroy a world like starships do.
Posted by: Oldcat at December 27, 2021 04:49 PM (eoQWY)
++++
Ummm, remember me?

Posted by: Diamond Princess, COVID survivor at December 27, 2021 04:55 PM (NoRxl)

363 360 What's the point of a make believe fantasy reality world if it's just going to be full of women complaining and ruining everything like the real world?
Posted by: Bitter Clinger at December 27, 2021 04:55 PM (5We2S)

This is why we can't have nice things.

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. at December 27, 2021 04:55 PM (II3Gr)

364 AoSHQ will be governed by busty lesbian pron stars from an earlier age

Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 27, 2021 04:53 PM (rxDDN)

I, for one, welcome our new busty lesbian pron star overlords.

Posted by: flounder, wrecker, hoarder at December 27, 2021 04:55 PM (SH2Zi)

365 What the fuck is a kwanzaa? Is that some kind of wheat cracker made in the Atlas Mountains?

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:56 PM (L9/32)

366 >This post has triggered my PTSD over the one time my Ugandan Knuckles avatar, endowed with extra large breasts, was assaulted repeatedly in the lobby of VR Chat by a mob of anime avatars.

I'm literally shaking right now, I can't even.
Posted by: Eric in Atlanta at December 27, 2021 04:52 PM (xfP4L)

LOL, I was just the other day watching some stupid meme compilation vid that had a clip of Ugandan Knuckles in tank in VRChat, flying the Soviet flag and playing the Soviet anthem, cursing at weebs and generally being an extreme nuisance. I approve.

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at December 27, 2021 04:56 PM (cSs/W)

367 Lose the liberalism and about 100 pounds. Your odds will improve exponentially.
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw

Does the carpet match the purple drapes?

Posted by: Miklos, idly axin' at December 27, 2021 04:56 PM (QzkSJ)

368 What the fuck is a kwanzaa? Is that some kind of wheat cracker made in the Atlas Mountains?
Posted by: Marcus T

*shrugs*

Posted by: Miklos, entirely guided by self interest at December 27, 2021 04:57 PM (QzkSJ)

369 This was a surprise? Virtual people in a virtual environment and you are surprised a chick got her virtual butt touched? That is the first thing I would do.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 27, 2021 04:57 PM (bKdTl)

370 Does the carpet match the purple drapes?
Posted by: Miklos

I would never put myself in the situation to find out. Ewwww.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 27, 2021 04:57 PM (mD/uy)

371 Does the carpet match the purple drapes?
Posted by: Miklos, idly axin' at December 27, 2021 04:56 PM (QzkSJ)

That sounds like it would sting.

Posted by: Jordan61 at December 27, 2021 04:57 PM (Ez6QX)

372 367 Does the carpet match the purple drapes?
Posted by: Miklos, idly axin' at December 27, 2021 04:56 PM (QzkSJ)

==========

I would do naughty things with Ramona Flowers.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, who is too old for this shit at December 27, 2021 04:57 PM (LvTSG)

373 omg ugandan knuckles

happier times

Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 04:58 PM (j9HX3)

374 What the fuck is a kwanzaa? Is that some kind of wheat cracker made in the Atlas Mountains?
Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:56 PM (L9/32)
---------
A dry buckwheat pancake covered with shame.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea at December 27, 2021 04:58 PM (DnWKq)

375 I'd bet the dwarves got a little gropy with Snow White while they had the chance.

Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:59 PM (X1tGT)

376 356

philly always celebrates stupid things in weird ways tho - it's our jam

THAT SAID

I'm sure the Mummers Parade isn't happening. I don't even care to look!
Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 04:53 PM (j9HX3)

Nope, it's a go...you think someone was gonna try telling uber-drunk South Philly guys who show up at 7am probably not having slept the night before that they can't shake it and play down Broad Street...yeah, not this year...

Posted by: Nova local at December 27, 2021 04:59 PM (exHjb)

377 But I will add one thing: AoSHQ will be governed by busty lesbian pron stars from an earlier age
Posted by: Huck Follywood

With bushes that look like Alfalfa in a head lock.

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:59 PM (uXonU)

378 AoSHQ virtual world would have the daywalkers and the night stalkers facing off with like the castle scene in "The Holy Grail" and all wondering about the people that travel between those worlds.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at December 27, 2021 04:59 PM (coYBh)

379 I'd bet the dwarves got a little gropy with Snow White while they had the chance.
Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:59 PM (X1tGT)
-----------
Gropy was the eighth dwarf. Had to be let go due to workplace violations.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea at December 27, 2021 04:59 PM (DnWKq)

380 I'd bet the dwarves got a little gropy with Snow White while they had the chance.
Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:59 PM (X1tGT)

-----------

One day she made Grumpy Happy.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at December 27, 2021 05:00 PM (eA1RV)

381 "Are you saying that she virtually asked for it?"

ha, yeah, but I was going for -- that is the game they want to play in fake world, when in real life they don't have a healthy relationship .. because they are obnoxious Karens.

The ability to virtually touch anyone sexually (digitally, but without the digits) .. would have to be written in the program. They could make it impossible, at least impossible without BigTech consent form filled out.

Posted by: illiniwek at December 27, 2021 05:00 PM (Cus5s)

382 I'd bet the dwarves got a little gropy with Snow White while they had the chance.
Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:59 PM (X1tGT)

I mean, she WAS passed out......

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 05:00 PM (Zz0t1)

383
With bushes that look like Alfalfa in a head lock.
Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 04:59 PM (uXonU)

*coughBuckwheatcough*

Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. at December 27, 2021 05:00 PM (II3Gr)

384 I would think the Mummers would strut down Broad St

Posted by: Skip at December 27, 2021 05:01 PM (2JoB8)

385 We can only hope that griefers make the experience in the Metaverse so excruciating that they strangle the infant product in the crib. They'd be doing humanity a solid.

Posted by: Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it! at December 27, 2021 05:01 PM (cSs/W)

386 CDC just cut the isolation time for COVID from 14 to 5 days.

Brandon's getting ready for his victory lap and someone is going to take Fredo Fauci fishing.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 05:01 PM (VpIIl)

387 I'd bet the dwarves got a little gropy with Snow White while they had the chance.
Posted by: Ben Had

Price Charming with Sleeping Beauty was the one. Before he kissed her to wake her he did some things.

Just saying.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 27, 2021 05:01 PM (mD/uy)

388
*coughBuckwheatcough*
Posted by: Insomniac - Outlaw. Hoarder. Wrecker. at December 27, 2021 05:00 PM (II3Gr)

I'm from a predominantly black family and have yet to run across a relative named Buckwheat.

Posted by: Eddie Murphy at December 27, 2021 05:01 PM (Zz0t1)

389 Afternoon.

Isn't Metaverse just basically Second Life?

Is it me or is "big tech" so bereft of ideas that all that's left for them is to take 15 year old nerd shit and repackage it for the normies?

Posted by: Robert at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (1Yy3c)

390 Nope, it's a go...you think someone was gonna try telling uber-drunk South Philly guys who show up at 7am probably not having slept the night before that they can't shake it and play down Broad Street...yeah, not this year...

yay!

well I'm happy to hear this! I figured Kenney was still pissing all over everything fun

Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (j9HX3)

391 *coughBuckwheatcough*
Posted by: Insomniac

Don't like bushes THAT big.

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (uXonU)

392 "What the fuck is a kwanzaa? Is that some kind of wheat cracker made in the Atlas Mountains?
Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 04:56 PM (L9/32)
---------
A dry buckwheat pancake covered with shame.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea at December 27, 2021 04:58 PM (DnWKq) "

I thought so. Probably a side of FAIL

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (VpIIl)

393
Price Charming with Sleeping Beauty was the one. Before he kissed her to wake her he did some things.

Just saying.
Posted by: Tonypete at December 27, 2021 05:01 PM (mD/uy)

Had to make sure she didn't have any grooming or maintenance issues, ya know.....

Posted by: Prince Charming at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (Zz0t1)

394 352 Every tranny will be hanging out in the Metaverse 24x7.

Posted by: The Future! at December 27, 2021 04:52 PM (I2/tG)

------------

ISWYDT.

Posted by: ShainS -- Beware the Branch Covidians at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (gKU6J)

395 AoSHQ virtual world would look like the end of Blazing Saddles.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (YFAIE)

396 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA!

*wheeze*

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Posted by: Rosasharn at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (PzBTm)

397 Brandon's getting ready for his victory lap and someone is going to take Fredo Fauci fishing.

I think you're correct

I'd love to be that someone

Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (j9HX3)

398 356 - I'm sure the Mummers Parade isn't happening. I don't even care to look!
Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 04:53 PM (j9HX3)

The Mummer's Parade returns to South Broad Street! Masks required, of course! Looking forward to seeing if the wenches and clowns shall poke fun at Jim and Larry, who are not serious leaders.

Posted by: Lola at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (VQp1G)

399 I'd bet the dwarves got a little gropy with Snow White while they had the chance.
Posted by: Ben Had

Word is the dwarves got a tad frisky with Judy garland in Over the Rainbow. LOL

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 27, 2021 05:03 PM (Irn0L)

400 This was a surprise? Virtual people in a virtual environment and you are surprised a chick got her virtual butt touched? That is the first thing I would do.
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy

50/50 between virtual groping and virtual pantsing.

Knowing if clothing is part of an avatar or a separate thing is critical information.

Posted by: mikeski at December 27, 2021 05:03 PM (P1f+c)

401 But I AM taking this seriously.

Really.

Posted by: Rosasharn at December 27, 2021 05:03 PM (PzBTm)

402 What do I gotta do to groped by some guy in real life?!''

Visit Italy, especially Rome.

Posted by: Been Lurking, but clearly been posting too at December 27, 2021 05:03 PM (rDgjh)

403 lola I might have to attend!!

I'm very excited to hear that it's happening!!!

and definitely need to see the wenches this year

Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 05:03 PM (j9HX3)

404 AoSHQ virtual world would look like the end of Blazing Saddles.
Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (YFAIE)
-----------
Crashing out of the Warner backlot?

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea at December 27, 2021 05:04 PM (DnWKq)

405 "I think you're correct

I'd love to be that someone

Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 05:02 PM (j9HX3) "

Not if I get there first. He's going to get tied up, pushed down a flight of stairs onto broken glass, lit on fire feet first and hit with adrenaline darts until his body gives out. That's before the burial in murder plastic.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 27, 2021 05:04 PM (VpIIl)

406
I'm from a predominantly black family and have yet to run across a relative named Buckwheat.
Posted by: Eddie Murphy

I have numerous Cousins of the Caucasian Persuasion and none are named Alfalfa.

There is a Spanky, but that's actually her strip bar Nic.

Posted by: Miklos, who tried the Cotton/Monkey trick many times as a child, without success at December 27, 2021 05:04 PM (QzkSJ)

407 Word is the dwarves got a tad frisky with Judy garland in Over the Rainbow. LOL
Posted by: Nevergiveup

I thought they got jiggy with the flying monkeys?

Posted by: rickb223 Pureblood - non-GMO at December 27, 2021 05:05 PM (uXonU)

408
There is a Spanky, but that's actually her strip bar Nic.
Posted by: Miklos, who tried the Cotton/Monkey trick many times as a child, without success at December 27, 2021 05:04 PM (QzkSJ)

She hot?

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 05:06 PM (Zz0t1)

409 Gropy was the eighth dwarf. Had to be let go due to workplace violations.
Posted by: Captain Obvious

Gropy, Feely, Handsy... all of us. It was a bloodbath that day.

Posted by: Touchy at December 27, 2021 05:06 PM (P1f+c)

410 NOOD.

Musk....

Posted by: Sponge - Remembering Tami at December 27, 2021 05:06 PM (Zz0t1)

411 The Pasadena Doo-Dah Parade used to be a hoot. The Lawn-mower drill team.

Posted by: Been Lurking, but clearly been posting too at December 27, 2021 05:06 PM (rDgjh)

412 Gropy, Feely, Handsy... all of us. It was a bloodbath that day.

Posted by: Touchy at December 27, 2021 05:06 PM (P1f+c)

CNN has some openings.

Posted by: CNN at December 27, 2021 05:06 PM (SH2Zi)

413 She hot?
Posted by: Sponge

She ain't one of the Uglies they put on in the afternoon.

Posted by: Miklos, who took a Community Kollidge class in Marketing at December 27, 2021 05:07 PM (QzkSJ)

414 Am I supposed to care about this? Should I log into the meta verse and then start caring and then stop caring again when I log off?

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at December 27, 2021 05:07 PM (p2Eoz)

415 being groped by flying monkeys could turn you into a wicked witch.

Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 05:08 PM (X1tGT)

416 380 I'd bet the dwarves got a little gropy with Snow White while they had the chance.
Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 04:59 PM (X1tGT)

-----------

One day she made Grumpy Happy.
Posted by: Duke Lowell at December 27, 2021 05:00 PM (eA1RV)

--------

And Doc Bashful!

Posted by: ShainS -- Beware the Branch Covidians at December 27, 2021 05:08 PM (gKU6J)

417 Gropy, Handsy, Feely and Peter

Posted by: Ben Had at December 27, 2021 05:09 PM (X1tGT)

418 What's the point of a make believe fantasy reality world if it's just going to be full of women complaining and ruining everything like the real world?

___

BINGO!

Killed metaverse before it started

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at December 27, 2021 05:11 PM (p2Eoz)

419 @375 I'd bet the dwarves got a little gropy with Snow White while they had the chance.

----

In the Fables comic books backstory, she went back and killed them all afterwards for just this reason.

No joke.

On the VR topic, I've got a new Oculus. It's interesting messing around with it. But I've also discovered that I'm a bit more susceptible to motion sickness than I had thought. Tolerance for that is something that can be built up over time with practice. And ginger - of all things - apparently helps with it, as well. So I guess it's time to add ginger snaps to my baking list.

Players in on-line environments harass. It's what some of them do. Players do things to annoy other players purely because they can. I remember back in the early days of Everquest, players from the larger races (ogres and trolls) would intentionally block doorways so that other players couldn't get through. And then there were the players who would intentionally gather a large group of hostile monsters, run them up to the dungeon entrance (called a "train" in the game slang), and try and "peel" at least a couple of them off on every group of players that they passed along the way.

Posted by: junior at December 27, 2021 05:15 PM (PTw5h)

420 348 it's pretty big here b/c the weirdo murderer guy who created it was from here

we're very loyal even to guys who kill their girlfriends and stuff them in trunks.

hey Ira you maniac! you still our homie
Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 04:51 PM (j9HX3)
---------------------
There's a strange sense & history of gathering. Philly was the only city to have an Earth week in 1970, not to mention our riots, burnings, bombings and parades through the decades.

I often wonder if its not the East Coast's Portland.

Posted by: Lola at December 27, 2021 05:16 PM (VQp1G)

421 Way back when, I liked the original sim city where you actually build the city. Once they came out with sim people, I had no interest. I try to stay away from people.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at December 27, 2021 04:53 PM (coYBh)

There's a pretty good game Cities Skylines where you citybuild like that - build neighborhoods, highways, industries, mass transit.

It also has natural disasters you can turn on to mess things up.

Posted by: Oldcat at December 27, 2021 05:16 PM (eoQWY)

422
The Metaverse. Jeebus. I can't wait for when the cops beat you with a baton for not wearing *this* mask. You know it's coming.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 27, 2021 05:36 PM (hQ23g)

423 I am so over stupid women.

I grew up during a different time. I was once groped on a tunnel ride at Six Flags and could not wait to start punching the jerk. Turns out he had already been reported to the park personnel because he repeatedly rode the ride for that purpose so when we emerged from the tunnel and I'm beating on him the police were ready to arrest him. They had no issues with my assaulting him.

This happened in Texas where most women are brought up knowing how to glam up AND shoot.

Posted by: Mandarin in the gulags for the win at December 27, 2021 05:41 PM (junJd)

424 403 lola I might have to attend!!

I'm very excited to hear that it's happening!!!
and definitely need to see the wenches this year
Posted by: Black Orchid at December 27, 2021 05:03 PM (j9HX3)
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I love the string bands! And I like to watch how long it takes for some of the wenches (the Froggy Carr group in particular) to go off program. So, if I can line up a place where's there's Philly pretzels & suitable public spot-a-pots, I might see you there!

Posted by: Lola at December 27, 2021 05:44 PM (VQp1G)

425 How did she know she was groped? I understand that VR is strictly visual unless you/re wearing some sort of suit that transmits sensations.

I call BS.

Posted by: Steve at December 27, 2021 05:49 PM (3HoYY)

426 Didn't think 2021 could have a news story more "Big If True" than that Congressman being censured over anime-- and then right under the wire, this tele-grope arrives, like a gunshot

Posted by: Swamposphere at December 27, 2021 05:49 PM (K6vyS)

427 This is the kind of blog post that makes Ace great.

I needed the laugh and you provided it.

Posted by: William Eaton at December 27, 2021 05:51 PM (cfkTP)

428 Probably the people she says supported her being groped were telling her to get over it it wasn't her real body nor did she get groped. Her NPC got groped.

Posted by: jakee308 at December 27, 2021 06:17 PM (3YVDU)

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