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Governor Abbot and Texas AG to Hairstylist-Jailing Judge: You Have Abused Your Discretion. Release Her Now.

Via Twitchy.


If you missed it, the judge sentenced her to jail because she refused to lie and say she was sorry for earning a lawful living.

Meanwhile, people are ridiculing the Chairborne Rangers who used an MRAP to shut down a bar in Odessa, Texas-- calling these fatboys "Meal Team Six."

If making fun of some jelly-bellied softboys with Rambo fantasies makes them think twice about using excessive force to impose unconstitutional laws on law-abiding citizens, then let the sick burns flow.


Posted by: Ace at 03:15 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 first

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:16 PM (UWqZJ)

2 what oinks

Posted by: CN at May 06, 2020 03:16 PM (ONvIw)

3 mmmmmmmmmmm

Posted by: browndog at May 06, 2020 03:16 PM (gD6Ka)

4 Fat cops. Huh.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 06, 2020 03:16 PM (ptqGC)

5 1st?

Posted by: BifBewalski at May 06, 2020 03:16 PM (VcFUs)

6 The police seem to have themselves an RV

Posted by: Theo at May 06, 2020 03:17 PM (/6GbT)

7 that's what happens when ya read the content dumbass

Posted by: BifBewalski at May 06, 2020 03:17 PM (VcFUs)

8 I'll fetch the otters

Posted by: BifBewalski at May 06, 2020 03:17 PM (VcFUs)

9 I'll chip in extra for a treadmill with the rear shark tank attachment

Posted by: dIb at May 06, 2020 03:17 PM (VJOLZ)

10 And the one dude has his rifle pointed right at the other dudes ass. Real pro's

Posted by: Greg61 at May 06, 2020 03:17 PM (FvHZ4)

11 I've had enough of this shit.

End. It. Now.

Posted by: Ladyl at May 06, 2020 03:18 PM (TdMsT)

12 Judge Moye is up for re-election. I hope there are, at least, a few people in that festering puss of blue who send him packing.

Posted by: Orson at May 06, 2020 03:18 PM (s171C)

13 Abbott: This aggression will not stand!!

Posted by: LASue at May 06, 2020 03:18 PM (Ed8Zd)

14 They're about to storm the Krispy Kreme.

Let no donut go uneaten!

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 06, 2020 03:18 PM (ptqGC)

15 But she still gets to keep the money from the GFM right?

Posted by: Boots at May 06, 2020 03:19 PM (oGBso)

16 10 And the one dude has his rifle pointed right at the other dudes ass. Real pro's
Posted by: Greg61 at May 06, 2020 03:17 PM (FvHZ4)

Give 'em a half point for reasonably good trigger discipline

Posted by: browndog at May 06, 2020 03:19 PM (gD6Ka)

17 Real-life Scully and Hitchcock.

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:20 PM (Eicbe)

18 That 'tank' looks like it was designed after the 'RV' in "Stripes".

Posted by: Puddleglum at May 06, 2020 03:20 PM (MVR7y)

19 Best damn governor in the US!

Posted by: Jesus Built My HotRod at May 06, 2020 03:20 PM (acl3b)

20 While I applaud Abbot on this, it proves that he gave an order he never intended to be followed. There is a danger in doing that because some hall monitor tyrant will always want to follow it.

Posted by: SH at May 06, 2020 03:20 PM (sX1BW)

21 Replying to @CBS11Andrea
Judge Eric Moye asked Luther if she would make a statement admitting she was wrong and selfish. Listen here...

@CBS11Andrea
The judge told Shelley Luther she could avoid jail time if she apologized, admitted she was wrong, and agreed to close her hair salon until it was allowed to open.


The Maoism is strong with this one.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:20 PM (hYcqw)

22 Everything in the post seems cromulent.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 06, 2020 03:20 PM (r+sAi)

23 >>>Meal Team Six

lol

101st Chairborne.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:20 PM (KnJdm)

24 AR15 versus beer bottle, sounds like a Sunday afternoon thread

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (Hcsoi)

25
I've always wondered if black judges would be easier on people or more privileged and power-crazed.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (mht8P)

26 You can bet that "white privilege" and "racism" charges are going to be coming from the left hive before the day is out

Posted by: Lebron Horowitz at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (UFgOG)

27 Clearly the Governor is in Contempt of this Court.

7 Days for him too!

Posted by: Texas Judge at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (NgKpN)

28 Typical GOP. A strongly worded letter.

Posted by: Ghost of Lee Atwater at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (mdRoh)

29 Look at the cops that did that swat thing today. Omg.

They're on their way to the sit-up contest, and they mean to win!

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (J4SfM)

30
Can we get a public bitch slapping of the judge with this?

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (dhk+c)

31 Meal Team Six, someone has to trademark that quick.

Posted by: Mr. Scott (Formerly GWS) at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (JUOKG)

32 regarding the Ector County Deputy Dawgs: in my experience, a lot of Sheriff's Deputies, especially in more rural counties, tend to be guys from the local high school football team who never really got a handle on all a' that reedin' and ritin' stuff.

Posted by: Tom Servo at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (trdmm)

33 That SWAT picture needs to be a poster. And posted everywhere.

Maybe get a mention in the discussion of why chain mail bikinis aren't really armor, too.

Posted by: Methos at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (kOpft)

34 the one fella makes his vest look like a training bra :O

Posted by: Big V Caffeinated at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (NeD6B)

35 Okay the GoFundMe for the treadmill is completely awesome.

Posted by: alexthechick - Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (GbPPJ)

36 Heh.

"Meal Team Six"...

Posted by: hawkpilot at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (c1WZB)

37 Spaceballs RV

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (aKsyK)

38 Damn I was totally going to steal that Meal Team Six joke too.

Posted by: Brian in New Orleans at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (CQ3Qb)

39 23 >>>Meal Team Six

lol

101st Chairborne.
Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:20 PM (KnJdm)

Dare I say?

Moron Corps?

Posted by: Texas Judge at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (NgKpN)

40 21
Replying to @CBS11Andrea

Judge Eric Moye asked Luther if she would make a statement admitting she was wrong and selfish. Listen here...



@CBS11Andrea

The judge told Shelley Luther she could avoid jail time if she
apologized, admitted she was wrong, and agreed to close her hair salon
until it was allowed to open.



The Maoism is strong with this one.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!)


Yep. Struggle Sessions.

Posted by: Puddleglum at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (MVR7y)

41 I've always wondered if black judges would be easier on people or more privileged and power-crazed.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (mht8P)
++++++++++++++++
I think race matters relatively little in all probability. They are vessels of state power. The only color that matters is the color of the robe.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (hYcqw)

42 You're gonna need some bigger vests.

Posted by: Chief Brody at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (DMUuz)

43 12 Judge Moye is up for re-election. I hope there are, at least, a few people in that festering puss of blue who send him packing.
Posted by: Orson

Forget it Jake, it's Dallas town.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn DA 1977 at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (kfcYC)

44 I've always wondered if black judges would be easier on people or more privileged and power-crazed.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (mht8P)


Probably depends to some extent on the demographic they're dealing with.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (J4SfM)

45 Whale Team Six

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (ptqGC)

46 The Maoism is strong with this one.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:20 PM (hYcqw)

Repent your sins against muh authoritay, and you shall be welcomed into the kingdom of libtardia.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (KnJdm)

47 Don't cops have to at least prove they can do a few pushups every now and then?

Posted by: Mark1971 at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (xPl2J)

48 Meanwhile, here in California:

Psychotic Violent Street-Bum Stalks and Threatens Homeowner; Gets Arrested, then Promptly Released Because of Covid-19 "No Bail" Empty-the-Prisons Executive Order; Immediately Goes and Murders His Intended Victim

https://www.ktvu.com/news/ suspect-in-oakland-slaying-had-history- of-threats-against-victim-police-say

Blood is on the hands of Democratic governors who are emptying the prisons, letting violent killers free. It's beyond infuriating.

Posted by: zombie at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (N9G0H)

49 Posted by: Texas Judge at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (NgKpN)

Sockiosssooo

/flick and swish

Posted by: Romeo13 at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (NgKpN)

50 For the record the Dallas 'judge' in this case is nothing of the sort, it is an elected position, and clearly an understanding of the actual law is not a occupational requirement.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (Hcsoi)

51
"Put. That. Coffee. Down!!"

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (mht8P)

52
Wow, Strong Words, governor abbot.

Posted by: Soothsayer at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (dGzLr)

53 >We make label.s. My position...is NOT essential.


it's essential to your customer who needs labels

Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (iTXRQ)

54 Is this America?


....


Nope.


Ain't fixing it either.

Posted by: National Divorce at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (4Q1w7)

55 So apparently there is a big and tall SWAT equipment store somewhere. Who knew?

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (1ISKN)

56 Meal Team Six also needs to find relaxed-fitting pants, not form fitting. Ewww

Posted by: Curly Shuffle at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (ch6++)

57 48 Blood is on the hands of Democratic governors who are emptying the prisons, letting violent killers free. It's beyond infuriating.
Posted by: zombie at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (N9G0H)

=========

And most of California will be fine with it.

Better than voting for icky Republicans.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (UWqZJ)

58 They're big boned!!!

Posted by: Larsen E. Whipsnade a fucking ray of sunshine at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (bML9A)

59 Blood is on the hands of Democratic governors who are emptying the prisons, letting violent killers free. It's beyond infuriating.
Posted by: zombie at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (N9G0H)
+++++++++++++
They have to let violent criminals go free to use the space for disobedient citizens, comrade!

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (hYcqw)

60 Wait.

Which one is the tank.....?

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (2BgZB)

61 Is the lead fatty sporting a rat tail too?

Posted by: browndog at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (gD6Ka)

62 Squeal team six.

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (Eicbe)

63 And the one dude has his rifle pointed right at the other dudes ass.

In fairness, it's a big ass.

Posted by: Laughing in Texas at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (ExV1e)

64 Surprised that judge did not want her to ask "pretty please with sugar on top" on bended knee.... what a dick.

Posted by: Pliney at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (nzKWW)

65 Honestly, every distance runner in California should be sure to do their runs on the beach. Those fatties on the police force will never catch them and it's hilarious to watch.

https://tinyurl.com/yakdte73

Posted by: Virginian at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (Mg1/u)

66 Holy shit! Who gave Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee fucking firearms? What could possibly go wrong???

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (o2MD2)

67 I love the way their bulletproof vests barely cover a patch of real estate on their enormous, gelatinous torsos. And you know those had to be the *largest* they had available LOL.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (+7yf7)

68 34 the one fella makes his vest look like a training bra :O
Posted by: Big V Caffeinated at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (NeD6B)


St. Greta of Cabbage Patch (remember her?) sobs.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (J4SfM)

69 Did anybody ever find out why the windows were busted out on that trailer?


Posted by: McLurkerson at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (UXHfL)

70
"Listen, Fat. And Other Fat..."

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (s2VJv)

71 God bless Texas, the AG, and Gov Abbott. And meme, burn, and laugh at the would-be jackboots for all the bullshit. Make them a joke! We will win this fight

Posted by: ghost of kari at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (8IQhD)

72 The vests are a bit ill-fitting shall we say.

Posted by: dananjcon at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (u6xw0)

73 Hey THEY WERE JUST FOLLOWING ORDERS YOU GUISE

Posted by: thathalfrican - sucker free on my phone at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (qiC0A)

74 Making fun of "Meal Team Six" and shaming them into thinking a bit more before acting is a much better solution, all the way around, than copper and lead injections.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing
at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (WEBkv)

75 LMAO!

Meal Team Six!

Posted by: Tami at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (cF8AT)

76 I'm personally glad that I did not take seriously complaints that buying the local police all sorts of tanks and armored vehicles would just result in the police deploying them against law-abiding citizens.

Posted by: ace at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (PbpT7)

77 Weebles wobble but they don't fall down.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (+7yf7)

78 We Were SWAT Team Once, And Fat

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (ptqGC)

79 Officers Tweedledum and Tweedledee

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (oVJmc)

80 According to our new overlords, the CDC, one person dies every 37 seconds from heart disease.

So you'll be interested in the collateral damage from a virus that's destroyed our economy, liberty due to a loss of life that's equivalent to a bad flu season.

'CVS Warns of Surge in Non CoronaVirus Health Problems"

CVS also owns Aetna, so they have some pretty good data. They are now saying that people with chronic conditions like heart disease are not see their doctors, and are not buying their medications. This will lead to an increase in the leading cause of death, heart disease.

But yeah, get that mask on and no haircut for you!

https://tinyurl.com/y9c9lusj

Posted by: Marcus T at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (VpIIl)

81 Hey THEY WERE JUST FOLLOWING ORDERS YOU GUISE
Posted by: thathalfrican - sucker free on my phone at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (qiC0A)
---
Supersized orders.

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (Eicbe)

82 Musta been sweet for a black judge to put a white woman in her place

Posted by: REDACTED at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (tQbpU)

83 The Fat Blue Line

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (oVJmc)

84 I hope PDT at least calls her. She is a warrior.

Posted by: jmel at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (OeWgo)

85 If the kulaks are hoarding meat, govt. agents will be sent to the countryside to seize it and distribute to the people in the cities. Everything will work out fine.

Posted by: Ripley at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (MxEKc)

86 >>>63 And the one dude has his rifle pointed right at the other dudes ass.

In your six.

Posted by: ace at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (PbpT7)

87 So the Texas judge and those fat sheriffs make me think maybe California is not so bad after all...

Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (4BMGG)

88 48 Meanwhile, here in California:

Psychotic Violent Street-Bum Stalks and Threatens Homeowner; Gets Arrested, then Promptly Released Because of Covid-19 "No Bail" Empty-the-Prisons Executive Order; Immediately Goes and Murders His Intended Victim

https://www.ktvu.com/news/ suspect-in-oakland-slaying-had-history- of-threats-against-victim-police-say

Blood is on the hands of Democratic governors who are emptying the prisons, letting violent killers free. It's beyond infuriating.
Posted by: zombie

Any word on whether they released him no bail again?

Posted by: Dirks Strewn DA 1977 at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (kfcYC)

89 Whalesky & Gutch

Posted by: x at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (nFwvY)

90 76 I'm personally glad that I did not take seriously complaints that buying the local police all sorts of tanks and armored vehicles would just result in the police deploying them against law-abiding citizens.
Posted by: ace at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (PbpT7)

=========

I remember when ending that selling practice by the Pentagon was a cause celebre.

Lasted maybe five minutes.

I miss that cause celebre.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (UWqZJ)

91
Lady should have said to the judge, "Kiss my pasty white ass. Your Honor."

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (mht8P)

92 >>Meal Team Six also needs to find relaxed-fitting pants, not form fitting.

Meat Team Six. heh

Posted by: JackStraw at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (ZLI7S)

93
Is it me or is Fat 1 look limp-wristed the way he grips the rifle?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (s2VJv)

94 Now we know why there's a hamburger shortage. These guys at all of it.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (ptqGC)

95 Looks like those SWAT guys are responding to a report that someone knocked over the local doughnut shop.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (J4SfM)

96 If making fun of some jelly-bellied softboys with Rambo fantasies makes
them think twice about using excessive force to impose unconstitutional
laws on law-abiding citizens, then let the sick burns flow.
---

You really do need to do a gut check before trampling the God-given Rights of US citizens

Posted by: Methos at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (kOpft)

97
A very, very long time ago on the bodybuilding.com forum, some dummy made a stupid post about lifting. The first response, from another dummy, was "Wow, strong arms." A meme was born.

But here we are: Wow, strong words.

These Republicans are Cucks -- all watching, no action.

Posted by: Soothsayer at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (dGzLr)

98 Wow, Strong Words, governor abbot.





Posted by: Soothsayer at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM

---

You do know that the Governor has little power over County Judges here in Texas right?

They are elected and are pretty much autonomous within their County.


The only people who can really reign them in is the County Commissioners, but we are talking Dallas County here, so that ain't happening.

Posted by: Mr. Scott (Formerly GWS) at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (JUOKG)

99 These guys don't need vests. They don't come near covering those planetary guts anyway. It would take an M2 to penetrate to the vitals anyway.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (o2MD2)

100 Fat Ass First Responders! Hail to our Heroes!

But really, trying to open your business brings the SWAT team? The Left must be orgasming.

Does this outdo the Swat Team dawn assault on Roger Stone and his deaf wife in their pajamas?

Posted by: Dan Smoot's Apprentice at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (H8QX8)

101 They're obviously compensating for the penises they haven't seen in twenty years!

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (+7yf7)

102 Also:

Orange County is arresting Republicans for the crime of going to the beach.

AT THE EXACT SAME TIME, Orange County is ... releasing sex criminals, rapists and child molesters from jail out onto the streets! :

https://ktla.com/news/local-news/ o-c-district-attorney-warns-residents- after-release-of-7-high-risk-sex-offenders -during-coronavirus-pandemic/

O.C. District Attorney warns residents after release of 7 'high-risk' sex offenders during coronavirus pandemic

"Orange County District Attorney Todd Spitzer on Tuesday issued a warning to residents after seven registered sex offenders who he said were "high-risk" were recently released from custody early, amid the ongoing coronavirus pandemic.

Spitzer said the convicted men spent "just days" in jail ...

The inmates who were released are:

Luis Joel Ramirez, 27 -- his criminal history includes sexual battery...

Rudy William Grajeda Magdaleno, 39 -- his criminal history includes child molestation, indecent exposure, assault, battery

Kyle Albert Winton, 40 -- his criminal history includes annoying or molesting a child, criminal threats to cause great bodily injury or death...

Jose Adrian Oregel, 46 -- his criminal history includes unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor, oral copulation of a person under the age of 18 and causing great bodily injury.

...etc. etc. etc.

Posted by: zombie at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (N9G0H)

103 I got your six donuts.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (r+sAi)

104 These wannabes Rambo LEO won't be persuaded by ridicule. They will dig in harder. Then again it would be nice to see at least one of them be contrite and admit that they went overboard and apologize.

OR ELSE I WILL SENTENCE YOU TO SEVEN DAYS WITHOUT DONUTS !!

Posted by: Kilroy wasn't here at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (cJswI)

105 Meal Team Six

lol

101st Chairborne.
Posted by: flounder


Keyboard Commando.

Posted by: rickb223 at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (At/8G)

106 Is it me, or does the guy on the right look like John Candy?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (J4SfM)

107 If you would kiss the king's seal and say "mercy" this shall all be over.

Posted by: Minister of Edward the Longshanks at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (O2PCU)

108 I wonder if they were chanting, "hut, hut, hut, hut" like the SWAT team in that movie.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (1ISKN)

109 >>>Is it me or is Fat 1 look limp-wristed the way he grips the rifle?


He looks like he's compensating for at least four different things.

Posted by: ace at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (PbpT7)

110 Maybe they need the MRAP because they broke the spine of their squad car.

Posted by: Methos at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (kOpft)

111 Meal Team Six also needs to find relaxed-fitting pants, not form fitting. Ewww
Posted by: Curly Shuffle at May 06, 2020 03:23 PM (ch6++)
-----------------

Best guess: Those are relaxed fit.

They weren't labeled, "Meal Team Six" for nothing.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing
at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (WEBkv)

112
I'm personally glad that I did not take seriously complaints that buying
the local police all sorts of tanks and armored vehicles would just
result in the police deploying them against law-abiding citizens.
-------------
At least they weren't in their civilian camou. I'm guessing the Army surplus didn't have a size XXXXL to donate.

Posted by: SH at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (sX1BW)

113 I got your six donuts.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (r+sAi)
---
Where's the other 5 1/2 dozen!

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (Eicbe)

114 I approve of their actions. Bigly.

Posted by: Karen O'Karenheimer at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (sjdRT)

115 Body armor for the dunlop?

Posted by: klaftern at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (RuIsu)

116 89 Whalesky & Gutch
Posted by: x at May 06, 2020 03:25 PM (nFwvY)


Prince of Man-Titties.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (s2VJv)

117 Honestly, every distance runner in California should be sure to do their runs on the beach. Those fatties on the police force will never catch them and it's hilarious to watch.

https://tinyurl.com/yakdte73
Posted by: Virginian at May 06, 2020 03:24 PM (Mg1/u)
++++++++++++
HA!

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (hYcqw)

118 Businesses they didn't storm to shut down?
Krispy Kreme

Dunkin

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (KnJdm)

119 The Ate Team

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (+7yf7)

120 Why does the Ector County sherriff's office have three oversized behemoths that it does not need?

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (Boy/L)

121 Seal Ion Team Six

Posted by: Ding Level at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (w9Wax)

122 Now fine the judge $7000 and send him to the chair.

Posted by: Old Sparky at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (FPtHm)

123 108: Blues Brothers
I think.

Posted by: Puddleglum at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (MVR7y)

124 I almost feel sorry for Meal Team Six (that is a perfect moniker, btw.)

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (A5zUN)

125 Up and down the bench in every state in this country are judges as or more radical than this one.

Why do you think divorce court is economic death for men?
Why do you think the Democrats have a endless supply of "no record" far- left judges?

Posted by: RoyalOil at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (s4lYG)

126 76 I'm personally glad that I did not take seriously complaints that buying the local police all sorts of tanks and armored vehicles would just result in the police deploying them against law-abiding citizens.
Posted by: ace
________

Those who count on the local police and sheriff's deputies to be on "our side" when the burning times come will be quite surprised and disappointed to find out how many of them are power-hungry, boot-licking toadies.

Posted by: Furious George at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (9vQJW)

127 25
I've always wondered if black judges would be easier on people or more privileged and power-crazed.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

Well we know how this guy chose to rule.


(How are you and Her Majesty and the pups doing? Been praying for you guys.)

Posted by: Moki at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (mFoNl)

128 Crosswalk Karen

https://tinyurl.com/yd64fh45

Posted by: redridinghood at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (wiXsO)

129 28 Typical GOP. A strongly worded letter.

Posted by: Ghost of Lee Atwater at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (mdRoh)

--------------
Heck, we in Arizona cannot even get that much out of Ducey.

Posted by: Curly Shuffle at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (ch6++)

130 That's a whole lot of center mass bulging out from their vests.

Posted by: krakatoa at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (zHyL2)

131 Abbott's statement is weak sauce. Note how he says jail was excessive, but not the $7000 fine. All while insisting that following executive orders is super dupes important and merely offering that there must have been some way short of jail to make her comply. This guy is such a disappointment.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (H5knJ)

132 From the Threads of Doom from Monty
To the shore of Peruvia
We fight each others battles
With no pants and lots of puns

First to fight for rights and Freedom
And to keep the Trolls engaged
We are proud to claim the title
Of Ace of Spades Moron!

Posted by: Moron Corp Hymn? at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (NgKpN)

133 Almost restores some faith in Amurica.

The ridicule, I mean.

Jeebus, WTF, how do people in that condition get any public safety related job, period?

Meal Team Six.

Perfect.

Posted by: rhomboid at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (El6T/)

134 Maybe get a mention in the discussion of why chain mail bikinis aren't really armor, too.


That discussion would need visuals to promote...umm...introspection.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (gd9RK)

135
They make Bearclaw Vindman and his brother look positively buff.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (s2VJv)

136 Non stop mockery maybe the only way the save our Republic.


Posted by: dananjcon at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (u6xw0)

137 Abbott doesn't have any direct authority over this but it will flip this on appeal if it even lasts that long.

Made me ponder- What is the difference had the judge told Shelly that she could avoid jail if she danced a jig? Or denounced Jesus?

Posted by: LASue at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (Ed8Zd)

138 Meal Teal Six.


LOL

Posted by: Lizzy at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (bDqIh)

139 Bulletproof muu muus might be an untapped market and potential goldmine.

Posted by: Biergood at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (FQWHA)

140 "Looks like someone's shown up to the bar to perform legal commerce."

"Strap up and hop in the tank. We got some intimidatin' to do."

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (UWqZJ)

141 How in the world do these people pass physicals? How terribly uncomfortable it would be to carry around that much weight.

Posted by: washrivergal at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (lmUUv)

142
President Trump signed a declaration honoring "Video Record Yourself and Your Co-workers Twerking in a Hospital" workers, aka nurses.

Posted by: Soothsayer at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (dGzLr)

143 The Green Buffets.

Posted by: Rex B at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (Ec72r)

144 I think I heard one of the SWAT team yell out, "Lightning Bolt, Lightning Bolt!'

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (Hcsoi)

145 I'll chip in $ for a javelvin missile for the bar.

Posted by: Embarrassing Stain at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (JY8Ei)

146

They look like ballistics jelly in clothing.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (s2VJv)

147 >>That's a whole lot of center mass bulging out from their vests.

Everything is bigger in Texas.

Posted by: JackStraw at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (ZLI7S)

148 Odessa PD saving up for that tactical armored Rascal Scooter.

Posted by: brak at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (cG+eD)

149 Those Squat Team boys just exude.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (R/9uX)

150 These fat fuck law enforcement officers are going to be looking for our support some time in the future. I'll be standing here with my hands in my pockets, assholes.

Posted by: Marcus T at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (VpIIl)

151 Cop Jong Uns.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (r+sAi)

152 My favorite is "Meal Team Six". Congratulations to whoever came up with that.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (bW1Yb)

153 They ate the laws!

Posted by: freaked at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (Tnijr)

154 Make the judge go on TV and apologize publicly to her. See how he likes it.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, hunker in the bunker at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (NVYyb)

155 Both guys have their fingers pointed down, and I suppose that's correct posture.

However, I'm guessing their wives have seen that posture more than they care to admit.

Posted by: BurtTC at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (hku12)

156 The Texas hairstylist will serve more time than all the coup plotters combined.

Posted by: Ripley at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (MxEKc)

157 Wouldn't hurt to eat a salad every now and then, officer.

Posted by: Count de Monet at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (q1Pj5)

158
You can bet that "white privilege" and "racism" charges are going to be coming from the left hive before the day is out
Posted by: Lebron Horowitz


They were already claiming that opposition to the lockdown is based on racism.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (aKsyK)

159 Blood is on the hands of Democratic governors who are emptying the prisons, letting violent killers free. It's beyond infuriating.
Posted by: zombie at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (N9G0H)

===

It all depends on whose blood.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (4BMGG)

160 When you watch the video, one guy is walking toward the protesters, gun pointed at the protesters, then, for some reason, decides he needs to look around, while walking and pointing a gun at people.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing
at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (WEBkv)

161 143 The Green Buffets.
Posted by: Rex B at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (Ec72r)


Old and Busted - The Choir Boys
New Hotness - The Fryer Boys

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (s2VJv)

162 "This military equipment will be used only against terrorist threats"

LOL

thanks, bush!

Posted by: ace at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (PbpT7)

163 147 >>That's a whole lot of center mass bulging out from their vests.

Everything is bigger in Texas.
Posted by: JackStraw at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (ZLI7S)

==========

What about common sense? Is that still bigger?

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (UWqZJ)

164 Bad judge! Bonk Bonk on the head!

Posted by: Norman Spiny at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (NSEzS)

165 131 Abbott's statement is weak sauce. Note how he says jail was excessive, but not the $7000 fine. All while insisting that following executive orders is super dupes important and merely offering that there must have been some way short of jail to make her comply. This guy is such a disappointment.
Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (H5knJ)

Aside from Trump, all republicans are low T. Worse than ever.

Posted by: Tomb of Kai at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (FPtHm)

166 You want to see real police brutality, just get betwixt those two fatties and a chow line.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (o2MD2)

167 Strap up and hop in the tank. We got some intimidatin' to do."
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (UWqZJ)

-------

Neither of those guys is going to be hopping in anything, even that tank.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (ptqGC)

168 25
I've always wondered if black judges would be easier on people or more privileged and power-crazed.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (mht8P)

They can be both--it all depends on the skin color of the defendant.

Posted by: sweetbagg at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (gJAok)

169 Crosswalk Karen

https://tinyurl.com/yd64fh45
Posted by: redridinghood at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (wiXsO)
---
Nothing says "We're all in this together" like berating someone.

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (Eicbe)

170 105
Meal Team Six



lol



101st Chairborne.

Posted by: flounder





Keyboard Commando.

Posted by: rickb223 at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (At/8G)

1st Baleen Raider Battalion.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (KnJdm)

171 It's not so much that Dallas is liberal as that they're corrupt and incompetent.

Posted by: sinalco at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (yODqO)

172 Any word on whether they released him no bail again?
Posted by: Dirks Strewn DA 1977


I wouldn't be surprised. Seriously.

He'll likely get "sectioned" -- classified as mentally ill, and not criminally liable -- sent to the nuthouse, then released after 48 hours for "not being a threat to himself." That's generally what happens to most psychotic hobos around here. You can't keep 'em locked up, no matter WHAT they do.

Posted by: zombie at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (N9G0H)

173 143 The Green Buffets.
Posted by: Rex B
____________

Niiiiiice.

Posted by: Furious George at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (9vQJW)

174 this is not the best day Texas has ever had.

Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (hHxp2)

175 Hondo Harrelson spins in his grave.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (+7yf7)

176 Meal Team Six : Operation Bearclaw

Posted by: A dude in MI at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (/6GbT)

177 Crosswalk Karen

https://tinyurl.com/yd64fh45
Posted by: redridinghood at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (wiXsO)
+++++++++++++
That right there is wife material. In some kind of mirror universe where unhinged violent bitches make good wives.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (hYcqw)

178 He has to keep doing this but where is the Texas legislature? Why are they not dealing with these judges? That's part of their job.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (KZzsI)

179 However, I'm guessing their wives have seen that posture more than they care to admit.

I don't think the deputies have seen "it" for some time.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (Boy/L)

180 Do you really need a vest when you have that much fat to stop a bullet?

Posted by: Mark1971 at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (xPl2J)

181 167 Strap up and hop in the tank. We got some intimidatin' to do."
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (UWqZJ)

-------

Neither of those guys is going to be hopping in anything, even that tank.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (ptqGC)

=========

"It was just an expression, Billy Bob! Stop trying to hop!"

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:31 PM (UWqZJ)

182 Buffet Recon

Posted by: A dude in MI at May 06, 2020 03:31 PM (/6GbT)

183 The Wide Blue Line

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 06, 2020 03:31 PM (aKsyK)

184 Col. Vindman just texted, "Jeebus. What a couple of fatties."

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 06, 2020 03:31 PM (ptqGC)

185 that lady should run for office. he wanted her to bend the knee and quiver, she didn't.

Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 03:31 PM (hHxp2)

186 174 this is not the best day Texas has ever had.
Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (hHxp2)


It beats NYC, where the cops aided and abetted the DeBolshevik's persecution of Jews.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:31 PM (s2VJv)

187 Coming soon to a theater near you: Odessa's finest bad boy cops starring in "Flabbeau!"

Posted by: ShainS, COVID-1984 survivor at May 06, 2020 03:31 PM (tM5os)

188 Pardon? Time to start fucking the deep state up the ass with the power of people actually elected. Cowards all.

Posted by: Valiant at May 06, 2020 03:31 PM (3MiF8)

189 Here's the thing-- did Abbott or Paxton make a referral to the judicial ethics board?
Did they announce a civil rights investigation?

Because both of those would have been the bare minimum the dems would have done if the roles were reversed.

And just after they called for his resignation.

Instead we get another pussyass, toothless sternly worded letter

Posted by: RoyalOil at May 06, 2020 03:31 PM (s4lYG)

190 Made me ponder- What is the difference had the judge told Shelly that she could avoid jail if she danced a jig? Or denounced Jesus?
Posted by: LASue at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM (Ed8Zd)

Excellent question, and one reason I thought her response to the judge's request was tantamount to a request to deny Jesus. What is to stop them from having us denounce Jesus as Lord? They've already shut down our churches.

Posted by: Miss Issippi at May 06, 2020 03:31 PM (LIhNq)

191 redridinghood.. I saw that earlier today. If that bitch had come up to my car in that manner she would have a gun to her fat fucking face.

Posted by: Jewells45 at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (dUJdY)

192 The Doughy Dozen

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (Hcsoi)

193 The Wide Blue Line

We have to save these.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (Boy/L)

194 Ok boys.

We're goin' in.

Time for a gut check.

Posted by: Ector County Sheriff Mike Griffis, size 58 at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (QzkSJ)

195 "Hoo boy I worked up a sweat getting this here vest on! How about we knock off and hit the Golden Corral on the way home? We can take the MRAP!"

Posted by: brak at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (cG+eD)

196 Aside from Trump, all republicans are low T. Worse than ever.
Posted by: Tomb of Kai at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (FPtHm)
---
Right. So when is Trump sending in the commandos to bust her out?

I like Trump. I side with Trump. But show me where he's not allowed his hands to be tied by Fauci of late.

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (Eicbe)

197 The judge told Shelley Luther she could avoid jail time if she apologized, admitted she was wrong, and agreed to close her hair salon until it was allowed to open.

The Maoism is strong with this one.
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:20 PM (hYcqw)

------

Holy shit, you nailed that one.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (jUVms)

198 I'm feeling much less worried about a food shortage now. Seems like that's one area we are well prepared.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (1ISKN)

199 Mall Santas moonlighting.

Posted by: klaftern at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (RuIsu)

200 Made me ponder- What is the difference had the judge told Shelly that she could avoid jail if she danced a jig?

Or sing "Camptown Races."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (J4SfM)

201 That OC DA warning about dangerous molesters being released was from last week.

I'm becoming wordless at the idiocy of so many in America.

Literally releasing dangerous prisoners - excuse me, what is the rationale for releasing *any* prisoners, when experience has already shown there will be a very minor hospitalization/death rate among inmates in infected prisons? - while trying to put regular people in jail for opening their small business.

As noted earlier today and by many since this began, gonna be a whole lot of reckoning WRT emergency powers/decrees etc. after this.

Posted by: rhomboid at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (El6T/)

202 Dudlies Do wrong

Posted by: willow at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (r1/wT)

203 Adam-12...Jelly Donuts

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (Boy/L)

204 I wonder if that County Judge uses Turtle Wax or Pledge to shine his pointy head?

Posted by: Count de Monet at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (q1Pj5)

205 Jay - ha!

Posted by: rhomboid at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (El6T/)

206 Blue Fatties Matter.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (ptqGC)

207 The Extremely Wide Blue Line

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (Hcsoi)

208 That's no moon!

It's Officer Cookie Dough!

Posted by: JackStraw at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (ZLI7S)

209 He has to keep doing this but where is the Texas legislature? Why are
they not dealing with these judges? That's part of their job.------------
No.
They won't be back in session for another year and half.
This is really on Abbot for his stupid order that he wanted the people to follow, but not to really be enforced (else it would come back on him). Dont' give an order you don't want enforced.

Posted by: SH at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (sX1BW)

210 Force 10--on the Richter scale.

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (Eicbe)

211 How about that: turns out sunlight is the best disinfectant for tyranny as well as the Wuhan flu!

Posted by: Lizzy at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (bDqIh)

212 people like crosswalk Karen get shot a lot.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (o2MD2)

213 200 Made me ponder- What is the difference had the judge told Shelly that she could avoid jail if she danced a jig?

Or sing "Camptown Races."
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (J4SfM)

==========

"I get a kick out of cocaine..."

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (UWqZJ)

214
More and more of this is just gonna start to happen. I suggest to these governors they give the "be free" signal so they can take some credit.

Every hair salon in TX should open up to support her.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (r+sAi)

215 Meal Team Six...that is spectacular!

Posted by: Lady in Black, sans mask at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (O+I8R)

216 Coming this fall to CBS "Scooter Texas Ranger."

Posted by: Buzzion at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (G2zl5)

217 I just got back from running errands. A lady got threatened with arrest at the post office. Yep, the post office. She was being a total cunt and refused to leave until she got her sheet of 15 cent stamps. The world is truly insane out there.

Posted by: Jewells45 at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (dUJdY)

218 It's neat how some people still believe these guys will disobey the order to confiscate our firearms.

Posted by: Brian in New Orleans at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (CQ3Qb)

219 141 How in the world do these people pass physicals? How terribly uncomfortable it would be to carry around that much weight.
Posted by: washrivergal

The scale LED said NO MAS whenever they stepped on it.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn DA 1977 at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (kfcYC)

220 You do know that the Governor has little power over County Judges here in Texas right?

They are elected and are pretty much autonomous within their County.


The only people who can really reign them in is the County Commissioners, but we are talking Dallas County here, so that ain't happening.
Posted by: Mr. Scott (Formerly GWS) at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (JUOKG)

Travis county Civil cases are appealed to the appellate court (3rd) and then the Texas supremes. I don't know how Harris County works but I assume its similar. I hope some lawyer is already on her case and gets this flipped, stat.

Posted by: LASue at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (Ed8Zd)

221
this is not the best day Texas has ever had.
Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (hHxp2)


*sing-songy voice, in English and Spanish*

What about meeeeeee?

Posted by: Judge Lina Hidalgo at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (mht8P)

222 185 that lady should run for office. he wanted her to bend the knee and quiver, she didn't.
Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 03:31 PM (hHxp2)


I saw Bend the Knee and Quiver open for Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam at The Kat Klub in '87.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (s2VJv)

223 The Camptown Ladies? I don't believe I know that song.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (1ISKN)

224 The French Fry Connection

Posted by: x at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (nFwvY)

225 Heck, we in Arizona cannot even get that much out of Ducey.
Posted by: Curly Shuffle at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (ch6++)
---------

I'm sort of surprised the AZ legislature hasn't slapped Ducey around a bit.

The real power, at least when I lived in AZ, resided with the State legislature. Or, at least, that was my understanding.

The legislature had no problem putting Janet Napolitano in her place when I lived in AZ.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing
at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (WEBkv)

226 The only thing they use that MRAP for is to park it by the street when they're out collecting money for the police ball or sheriffs fund or whatever they're always out collecting money for. Only time I've seen it until this.

Posted by: brak at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (cG+eD)

227 I've gotta admit, I'm not very impressed with gubner Abbott. He's the fella that banned golf courses from being open, after some Karen whined about Rich White People getting to violate the Stay At Home edict.

If I was a voting Texan, I'd be looking for a better quality conservative.

Primary this pussy the next chance y'all get.

He ain't worthy.

Posted by: GnuBreed at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (Z4rgH)

228 As expected, the Horde is bringing it.

LOLing so much I can hardly type a boring wordy comment.

Posted by: rhomboid at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (El6T/)

229 Y'all make a joke, but I saw some Houston cops at The Juicebox for a ballgame once upon a time that make those sheriff's deputies look anorexic. They did not inspire confidence.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (zqhdn)

230 >>>Proud Texan right now.


Not sure I'd be. The fact that a woman was imprisoned for running her business while simultaneously, actual criminals were being released, should terrify any resident of a so-called red state.

Posted by: Citizen Cake at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (HmZuC)

231 The Green Buffets.

Posted by: Rex B at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (Ec72r)


ahahahahahaha

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (dhk+c)

232 De Camp-town lay-days?

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (+7yf7)

233 210 Force 10--on the Richter scale.
Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (Eicbe)


Force-Feed 10, Some Minestrone...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (s2VJv)

234 If you watch the video of the SWAT raid of the bar, you'll notice a car with a FOX NEWS banner on the drivers side door. There is also someone with a professional level video camera (the FOX TV station perhaps?).
This makes you wonder who called the media?

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (N39Ws)

235 And the one dude has his rifle pointed right at the other dudes ass. Real pro's
======

I like it when he sticks it in my butt.

Posted by: Fat Cop #2 at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (vg8iE)

236 thanks, bush!
Posted by: ace at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (PbpT7)

------

Patriot Act and every police force thinking they are swat is an effing travesty.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (jUVms)

237 And the one dude has his rifle pointed right at the other dudes ass.

S'ok. He's never hit the broad side of a barn in training.

Posted by: His Sheriff at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (DMUuz)

238 143 The Green Buffets.
Posted by: Rex B at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (Ec72r)

I was going to do a parody of the Ballad of the Green Beret, but even I have limits.

*bow to Barry Sadler*

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (A5zUN)

239 You do know that the Governor has little power over County Judges here in Texas right?

They are elected and are pretty much autonomous within their County.


The
only people who can really reign them in is the County Commissioners,
but we are talking Dallas County here, so that ain't happening.

---
Call up the national guard and order a prison break, maybe?

Posted by: Methos at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (kOpft)

240 The one guy on the right needs to be holding up a cardboard BR549 sign.

Posted by: Lady in Black, sans mask at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (O+I8R)

241 The $2.2 trillion coronavirus relief law, the CARES Act, gives an extra $600 a week in federal aid to unemployed workers.
That enhancement ends after July 31. In some states, it ends a week earlier.
After that, jobless workers would just get their state unemployment benefit only. Prior to Covid-19, that state benefit replaced roughly 40% of prior wages for the average worker.

Posted by: SMOD at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (3aI0K)

242 "Fat Boys, you been here four hour. This is 'all you can eat, not can you eat all.' You go home now"

Still my favorite line from Crush Groove

Posted by: Darrell Harris at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (iuFgi)

243 Mitchell!

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (aKsyK)

244 159 Blood is on the hands of Democratic governors who are emptying the prisons, letting violent killers free. It's beyond infuriating.
Posted by: zombie at May 06, 2020 03:22 PM (N9G0H)

===

It all depends on whose blood.
Posted by: San Franpsycho


Actually, the victim in this particular case was himself black -- but he was a successful middle-class black guy who responsibly took care of his family and improved the neighborhood by fixing up homes, so he was "acting white" and thus deserved what he got, according to leftist morals.

Posted by: zombie at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (N9G0H)

245

End of the Weight-Watch...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (s2VJv)

246 Fatman and Blobbin

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (Hcsoi)

247 The Camptown Ladies? I don't believe I know that song.
Posted by: sniffybigtoe at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (1ISKN)
++++++++++++
This might jog your memory:

I get no kick from champagne
Mere alcohol doesn't thrill me at all
So tell me how could it be true
That I get a belt out of you

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (hYcqw)

248 I like Trump. I side with Trump. But show me where he's not allowed his hands to be tied by Fauci of late.
Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:32 PM (Eicbe)

I'd like to show him the video of Dr. Judy Mikovitz. But I wonder if it would make any difference.

Posted by: Dan Smoot's Apprentice at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (H8QX8)

249 Tanzania President Cancels $10billion Chinese Loan; Refers To The Terms And Conditions As One That Can Only Be Accepted By Drunkard Person.

Posted by: SMOD at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (3aI0K)

250 With that MRAP, how did those pudgy bastards ever climb in or out of it?

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (N39Ws)

251 177 Crosswalk Karen

https://tinyurl.com/yd64fh45
Posted by: redridinghood at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (wiXsO)
+++++++++++++
That right there is wife material. In some kind of mirror universe where unhinged violent bitches make good wives.
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (hYcqw)


Float like a butterfly manatee, sting like a bee ...

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (J4SfM)

252 MRAP?, I wanted a Subway Signature wrap!

Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (hHxp2)

253 I've heard about this for a day or so (don't shame me for not knowing what day it is in the Time of the Wuhans!) but this is the first I actually heard the judge's whole thing.

Holy shit. Submit, prostrate yourself, humble yourself to my law and repent!

Jesus fuck. I'd go to jail over a parking ticket against a judge like that.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (gd9RK)

254 177 Crosswalk Karen

https://tinyurl.com/yd64fh45
Posted by: redridinghood at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (wiXsO)
+++++++++++++
That right there is wife material. In some kind of mirror universe where unhinged violent bitches make good wives.
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (hYcqw)

I would have decked her as soon as she opened my door.

She was clearly a threat at that point.

Posted by: Romeo13 at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (NgKpN)

255 It's OK about where they're pointed, their rifles are loaded with delicious liquid cheese.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (+7yf7)

256 Well, off to get a Tdap booster so I'm allowed near my grandson when he's born....

Posted by: Tami at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (cF8AT)

257 You do know that the Governor has little power over County Judges here in Texas right?

They are elected and are pretty much autonomous within their County.

Posted by: Mr. Scott (Formerly GWS) at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (JUOKG)
---
I'd bet he still controls the building they are keeping her in. Unless Texas cedes power to the localities, that is.

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (Eicbe)

258 What is to stop them from having us denounce Jesus as Lord? They've already shut down our churches.

I expect the day is coming, Jesus told us to expect that, after all.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (KZzsI)

259 Fat Boys, Fat Boys. Whatca gonna do?

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (1ISKN)

260 I wonder how much range time those boys have had in the last several months.

bet they couldn't hit the broad side of a barn..

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (d7Ww2)

261 This might jog your memory:

I get no kick from champagne
Mere alcohol doesn't thrill me at all
So tell me how could it be true
That I get a belt out of you
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (hYcqw)


LOL! That's such a great movie!

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (J4SfM)

262 I think the APC might have been the only vehicle beefy enough to deliver the 'assault squad.'

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (oVJmc)

263 . Also most counties in the desert have their own navy.

Posted by: Humphreyrobot at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (R/9uX)

264 'Meal Team Six' hilarious!

Posted by: Cheri at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (oiNtH)

265 Patriot Act and every police force thinking they are swat is an effing travesty.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (jUVms)


Every police officer a hut-hut. And I'm supposed to be supportive of that hut-hut bullshit? When the police care more about the citizenry than their pensions, then I'll reconsider my non-support of them.

Posted by: RickZ at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (Y8PSl)

266 I thought Brian Dennehey was dead.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (ejd/p)

267 He ain't worthy.
Posted by: GnuBreed at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (Z4rgH)

They're all squishes.

Posted by: Dan Smoot's Apprentice at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (H8QX8)

268 260 I wonder how much range time those boys have had in the last several months.

bet they couldn't hit the broad side of a barn..
Posted by: nurse ratched at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (d7Ww2)


Range. As in 6-burner gas or Radar?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (s2VJv)

269 195 "Hoo boy I worked up a sweat getting this here vest on! How about we knock off and hit the Golden Corral on the way home? We can take the MRAP!"
Posted by: brak

Pretty sure those two know better than to go to a buffet with the other one.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn DA 1977 at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (kfcYC)

270 Why can't Abbott just pardon her and commute the fine?

Posted by: Ghost of Lee Atwater at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (mdRoh)

271 Chairborne Ranger, Chairborne Ranger
What did you do?

I closed a bar
For me and you

Bah. Cannot come up with anything.
There are some great cadences to work with, though.

Anyone familiar with this one?
Up high on a mountain,
I see a flash of light
Must be Chairborne Rangers
In a firefight

Well, I give myself a gold star for bringing up
Ranger cadences. No one will take it away from me.

Posted by: Denny Crane! at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (gJ9O0)

272 It's not so much that Dallas is liberal as that they're corrupt and incompetent.
Posted by: sinalco at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (yODqO)


Embrace the power of "and."

Posted by: LASue at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (Ed8Zd)

273
Sergeant York Patties

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (mht8P)

274 Chief Wiggum Lives.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (oVJmc)

275
If making fun of some jelly-bellied softboys with Rambo fantasies makes

them think twice about using excessive force to impose unconstitutional

laws on law-abiding citizens, then let the sick burns flow.
---First blood was actually a story of lone civilian standing up to these tin star dictators trampling on his Constitutional rights.
I recall it did not go well for the Sheriff's department in that movie

Posted by: HowardDevore at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (H6aLc)

276 252 MRAP?, I wanted a Subway Signature wrap!
Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (hHxp2)


The Juicy Smollett special!

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (J4SfM)

277 Tanzania President Cancels $10billion Chinese Loan; Refers To The Terms And Conditions As One That Can Only Be Accepted By Drunkard Person.

Maybe, just maybe, the world is beginning to wake up.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (Boy/L)

278 All the Planet Fitness' are empty, except for the staff working out, and cleaning. I bet these GOB's could trundle in and get a good ol' sweat going, and not worry about the repercussions...

...Diabetes and heart disease, on the other hand....

Posted by: Pinochet Air Tours Flt Attendant at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (UutBm)

279 That looks like an MaxxPro MRAP those fats slobs are hiding behind.

I supported law enforcement getting those vehicles because I didn't think they would be using them against citizens to enforce an unconstitutional quarantine order.

Not anymore and I'm sorry I did.

If you tubs of lard want to keep putting more people in the opposition, keep this crap up, assholes.

Posted by: Hesco Gypsy, staring from 457 meters at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (bGY3H)

280 With that MRAP, how did those pudgy bastards ever climb in or out of it?
Posted by: Our Country is Screwed

--

Without it, how would they get there? A Dodge 300 doesn't have enough suspension to carry both of them.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (Hcsoi)

281 "Oh, shit! It's Deputy Creosote!"

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (dfRN6)

282
Donnie Brisket.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (s2VJv)

283 The Pumpkin Dumpling Gang.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (r+sAi)

284
Battle of the Bulges

Posted by: Miklos, late to the Party at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (QzkSJ)

285 I've watched the YT videos of Hilter'Screaming Nazi Judge. He was killed during an air raid when a bomb hit his courtroom. By a column of some sort. Between 1942 and 1945 Freisler put to death 5,000 people.


Our Judges could watch the films and learn how to scream at the poor sole standing before him... /sarc

Posted by: Colin at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (bhBSF)

286 All laughs aside, this is tyranny...right?

I can't believe more Texans aren't getting riled up.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (jUVms)

287 What's depressing are the undoubtedly hundreds of cases like Luther's that aren't seeing the light of day.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (2BgZB)

288 143 The Green Buffets.

Posted by: Rex B at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (Ec72r)


Gorging "soldiers" in their tights,

Bottomless pits with appetites.

Men who have auth-or-i-tay.

The brave men of the Green Buffet.


Training bras upon their chest,

These are men? America's best?

One hundred men will test today,

But only three win the Green Buffet.


Trained to live off fat and ham,

Trained in donuts hand to hand.

Men who binge by night and day,

Courage take from the Green Buffet.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (KnJdm)

289 Pork Chop Wagon Riders of Odessa, UNITE!

Posted by: Martini Farmer - Not Masked and Hearding Cats at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (3H9h1)

290 254
177 Crosswalk Karen



https://tinyurl.com/yd64fh45

Posted by: redridinghood at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM (wiXsO)

+++++++++++++

That right there is wife material. In some kind of mirror universe where unhinged violent bitches make good wives.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (hYcqw)



I would have decked her as soon as she opened my door.



She was clearly a threat at that point.

Posted by: Romeo13 at May 06, 2020 03:35 PM (NgKpN)
Wonder how tough she'd act when staring down the business end of a firearm. As that crazy Karen was winding up for her second punch, I'd be reaching for the firearm.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (N39Ws)

291 162 "This military equipment will be used only against terrorist threats"

LOL

thanks, bush!
Posted by: ace at May 06, 2020 03:30 PM (PbpT7)

*****

I remember when cops switched from the revolver to the semi-automatic.

I didn't like it at the time.

Posted by: El Jefe at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (Ae67h)

292 Like the sheriff of Broward County I hope these people get the proper response to their deeds from the voters

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (KZzsI)

293 I thought Brian Dennehey was dead.

If by "dead," you mean "looks good as an MRAP" then, yes.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (Boy/L)

294 These guys have a Donut Resuscitate order.

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (Eicbe)

295 "Hey Alfie, my finger won't fit in the trigger....."

Posted by: Pinochet Air Tours Flt Attendant at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (UutBm)

296 Operation Over-gorged.

Posted by: Rex B at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (Ec72r)

297 Law and Order Takeout

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (+7yf7)

298 Couldn't Governor Abbott just issue a pardon to the salon owner? Issue the letter to the judge, but write up a pardon at the same time.

Posted by: Waste93 at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (FjQkD)

299 Derpico.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (KnJdm)

300

Size 54 Where Are You?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (s2VJv)

301 The judge must also apologize (by my rules) ... as Ace said, he demanded she LIE, and grovel.


Maybe this was covered and I missed it ... her charge was contempt? Of court, or of executive order? She showed no contempt for the court, she disobeyed the EO, if it was a "hard executive order", not a flaccid one.


Pritzker in IL says something like "if we are bad children, then the tougher rules will come back" ... but mostly it seems stores are left to enforce the orders. I haven't heard what happens if ten or more are gathered, or if someone penetrates a 6' zone. It is all an exercise in tyranny right now ... let's get this herd protection rolling before the dead economy can't be revived (except for box stores and Amazon, all doing fine thank you very much)

Posted by: illiniwek at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (Cus5s)

302
Pork Chop Ridge

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (mht8P)

303 I wonder how long it would take those boys to waddle 100 yards?

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (o2MD2)

304 Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (KnJdm)

/golf clap

Posted by: Romeo13 at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (NgKpN)

305 thanks, bush!
Posted by: ace


He was the one that started over arming agencies and cops. Obama took it to a whole new level.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (KZzsI)

306 28 Typical GOP. A strongly worded letter.
Posted by: Ghost of Lee Atwater at May 06, 2020 03:21 PM (mdRoh)

It must be remembered that, while I am in agreement, there is much to Gov Abbott's actions that leave much to be desired, the governorship of Texas is one of the weakest in the country. A case can be made that the Lieutenant Governor has more power than the Governor does.

People may gripe about the letter, but it may be all he can do. I'd be willing to bet that AG Paxton can do more here than the governor.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (zqhdn)

307 Special Porkies, they are. Notice the long tabs.

Posted by: Hesco Gypsy, staring from 457 meters at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (bGY3H)

308 Withering, entirely justified ridicule and amazement at the clear unfitness of these schlubs aside, WTFF with weapons-drawn? Hard to believe that in itself is not a serious violation of training and policy in itself.

Everyone always gets worked about the MRAPs and hardware but I don't think the attitude problem has anything do with that. In this case, it actually helps make people say "WTFF?" at the way this was handled.

Absent some specific threats or reckless trash talk from the bar owner or patrons to the fuzz prior to this scene, how can this approach be defended?

One cop drive up to the bar, go inside, point out that they are violating an order (for extra credit, roll your eyes and say you know a lot of this stuff is stupid, but for now it's the rule), and ask them to shut things down within 30 minutes. Politely.

Likely to get the job done. If not, then *2* cops roll up, in cruisers, and give a second warning. But this?

Posted by: rhomboid at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (El6T/)

309 New this fall to NBC. Law and Order: FAT

Posted by: Buzzion at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (G2zl5)

310 297 Law and Order Takeout
Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (+7yf7)


Slaw and Side Order...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (s2VJv)

311 A'm gonna barbeque yo ass.

Posted by: Sheriff Buffet T Justice at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (Tnijr)

312

Tubby Roosevelt and the Round Riders

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (dhk+c)

313 The Clod Squad

Posted by: Lady in Black, sans mask at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (O+I8R)

314 Tanzania President Cancels $10billion Chinese Loan; Refers To The Terms And Conditions As One That Can Only Be Accepted By Drunkard Person.


Uh ... who originally accepted the loan, President of Tanzania? Hmm?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (J4SfM)

315 Of course, if Governor Abbot doesn't want judges sending people to prison for violating his Executive Orders, perhaps he shouldn't issue EOs that empower judges to send people to prison simply for going to work at their jobs.

Posted by: Buck Throckmorton at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (d9Cw3)

316 I thought about one of these two disgraceful lard-asses going into a restaurant, and I had a flashback to Monty Python and the Meaning of Life.

"Please to get the monsieur a bucket...and a hose."

Posted by: Citizen Cake at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (HmZuC)

317 Spaetzle Commandoes

Posted by: A dude in MI at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (/6GbT)

318 CHoPS.

Posted by: Darrell Harris at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (iuFgi)

319 Couldn't Governor Abbott just issue a pardon to the salon owner? Issue the letter to the judge, but write up a pardon at the same time.
Posted by: Waste93

--

It has to be requested, and then go to a review board first.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (Hcsoi)

320 He ain't heavy...

Posted by: klaftern at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (RuIsu)

321 288 143 The Green Buffets.

Posted by: Rex B at May 06, 2020 03:29 PM (Ec72r)


Gorging "soldiers" in their tights,

Bottomless pits with appetites.

Men who have auth-or-i-tay.

The brave men of the Green Buffet.


Training bras upon their chest,

These are men? America's best?

One hundred men will test today,

But only three win the Green Buffet.


Trained to live off fat and ham,

Trained in donuts hand to hand.

Men who binge by night and day,

Courage take from the Green Buffet.
Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (KnJdm)

*****

Excellent work.

Posted by: El Jefe at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (Ae67h)

322 So, the AG thinks the Judge abused his discretion? He didn't give the order to shutter the businesses. He didn't arrest this woman for violating that order. Where's the AG's condemnation for everyone else to blame for this. The Judge may have been wrong, but he's just the public face of the CF.

Posted by: Formerly known as Skeptic at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (FR+I0)

323 Tanzania President Cancels $10billion Chinese Loan; Refers To The Terms And Conditions As One That Can Only Be Accepted By Drunkard Person.

Maybe, just maybe, the world is beginning to wake up.
Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:37 PM (Boy/L

Same President who said "Something is happening" when he submitted two covid tests samples from a goat and a fruit putting human names on the tests, and they came back positive for covid.

Posted by: Miss Issippi at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (LIhNq)

324 Aren't bulletproof vests supposed to cover, you know, all of your trunk??

Posted by: andycanuck at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (TQ/zJ)

325 Men in Backfat.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (r+sAi)

326 Meal Team Six...that is the funniest thing I've heard in awhile.

Meanwhile Shelly Luther is a genuine bona fide American Hero!!!

Posted by: Diogenes at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (axyOa)

327 We make label.s. My position...is NOT essential.
=======

Then quit.

But I imagine after this revelation, you won't have to worry about your position not being essential.

Posted by: bicentennialguy at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (vg8iE)

328 Jake and the Fatman

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (Boy/L)

329 The bar owner should have just ran away.

Posted by: Marcus T at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (VpIIl)

330 Police-A-Hut.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (KnJdm)

331 Posted by: illiniwek at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (Cus5s)

The Judge ORDERED her to comply with the executive order.

When she did not, he said that was contempt of the Court.

Catch-22

Posted by: Romeo13 at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (NgKpN)

332
Couldn't Governor Abbott just issue a pardon to the salon owner? Issue the letter to the judge, but write up a pardon at the same time.
Posted by: Waste93 at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (FjQkD)


Texas governors don't have plenary pardon power. Thanks, Ma Ferguson!

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (mht8P)

333 Adam-1200lbs

Posted by: Lady in Black, sans mask at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (O+I8R)

334 Meal Team Six is snort worthy.

Posted by: Grump928(c) at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (j8aRL)

335 Aren't bulletproof vests supposed to cover, you know, all of your trunk??
========

Aim for the fat apron!

Posted by: bicentennialguy at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (vg8iE)

336 303 I wonder how long it would take those boys to waddle 100 yards?
Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (o2MD2)

I thought they did the 'mosey' in Tejas?

Posted by: Pinochet Air Tours Flt Attendant at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (UutBm)

337 You do know that the Governor has little power over County Judges here in Texas right?

Which is all the more reason why Abbott could have released a far stronger statement - because the only constraints on him here are political ones. That this weak tea is all he could brew says a lot.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (H5knJ)

338 They need those military vehicles and tools to deal with the gangs that you never see them using them against.

Posted by: Moron Robbie saw a man remove his mask to sneeze at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (L+kF6)

339 I vote Derpico as the best one. Doesn't have to be a fatty to apply to crappy cops.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (KZzsI)

340

Those MRAP's have SERIOUS Ac/C in them... the Special Wraps and Tacos squad need it just to stay alive.

Posted by: Pendulating Richard at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (d6DSt)

341 OT but in regard to earlier topics: How many free rapes are Democrats entitled to?
Do they get one absolutely free of consequences, with the second accompanied by some minor embarrassment?
Or do they have unlimited free rapes?
And is all of this covered in the Democrat handbook?

Posted by: Northernlurker at May 06, 2020 03:42 PM (Uu+Jp)

342 Uh ... who originally accepted the loan, President of Tanzania? Hmm?
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (J4SfM)

----

China fucked up and trusted Tanzania.

It happens.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 03:42 PM (jUVms)

343 Send in the heavy squad!

Posted by: Count de Monet at May 06, 2020 03:42 PM (q1Pj5)

344 @313

The Gob Squad.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 06, 2020 03:42 PM (o2MD2)

345 Fort A-fatchee, The Bronx

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:42 PM (+7yf7)

346 It must be remembered that, while I am in agreement, there is much to
Gov Abbott's actions that leave much to be desired, the governorship of
Texas is one of the weakest in the country. A case can be made that the
Lieutenant Governor has more power than the Governor does.



People may gripe about the letter, but it may be all he can do. I'd
be willing to bet that AG Paxton can do more here than the governor.
----------------
All true. What he can do is open every one up.
Which is basically what is about to happen by end of week - but there are still some holdouts.

He is getting a little cute here. Doesn't want the bad publicity from the enforcing of this order but nor the bad publicity from opening up everything.
The judge should have just blamed Abbott and said his order left him no choice.

Posted by: SH at May 06, 2020 03:42 PM (sX1BW)

347 That discussion would need visuals to promote...umm...introspection.
Posted by: Bandersnatch at May 06, 2020 03:28 PM


DuckDuckGo can be assisstive in situations like this.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at May 06, 2020 03:42 PM (DMUuz)

348
Brisket County Junior

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:42 PM (s2VJv)

349 Abbot and the Ector County fatties have to be yankee locusts. No way those guys can be home grown Texans. No way at all.

Posted by: Ann Richards at May 06, 2020 03:42 PM (/LQkF)

350 What was the cause of Luther and the Odessa bar owner yesterday ... may be yours tomorrow.

Posted by: ShainS, COVID-1984 survivor at May 06, 2020 03:42 PM (UQEkW)

351 The governor should pardon whatever chair those blubber brothers sit in. It's cruel and unusual punishment.

Posted by: Marcus T at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (VpIIl)

352 Imagine the fun it would be to be chased by those two guys (as long as they didn't shoot).

You could jog backward in front of them, and encouraging them to catch up with you.

"Oooh, you're getting really red in the face! Careful!"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (J4SfM)

353 Hey, I'll have you all know I am now slightly less fat!

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (bkUtD)

354 I know, I know.

Which one is Jake and which one is the Fatman?

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (Boy/L)

355 Fat, inbred and violent is no way to go through life, son.

Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (NWiLs)

356 Jake and the Fatman

------------
Which one is Jake?

Posted by: SH at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (sX1BW)

357 I've had enough of this shit.

End. It. Now.
Posted by: Ladyl

You're beautiful when you're angry....

Posted by: JT at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (arJlL)

358 <blockquote>74 Making fun of "Meal Team Six" and shaming them into thinking a bit more
before acting is a much better solution, all the way around, than copper
and lead injections.</blockquote>
It's better if it works, but I doubt it will. Some people feel the need to show the rest of us they are boss, and that type are over-represented on police forces. If these guys are like that, they need to at least lose their weapons, if not their badges or their freedom.
Only if all those methods fail (or we are prevented from getting a judge to do them) are the injections called for.

Posted by: jdgalt at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (3SFo/)

359
Anyone else notice they look like brothers?

Or do all really fat people look alike, like the chinese waiters?

Posted by: Soothsayer at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (dGzLr)

360 The French Beignet Connection

Posted by: BurtTC at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (hku12)

361

Starchy & Fudge.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (s2VJv)

362 It has to be requested, and then go to a review board first.
Posted by: Vashta Nerada at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (Hcsoi)

*****

That may be the usual process, but I'm pretty sure there is nothing that legally *requires* it to follow that exact process.

I suspect that the governor could indeed issue a pardon on his own.

Just my guess though...

Posted by: El Jefe at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (Ae67h)

363 The Longest Buffet

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (J4SfM)

364

Spicy Wings and Tacos

Posted by: Pendulating Richard at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (d6DSt)

365 Of course, if Governor Abbot doesn't want judges sending people to prison for violating his Executive Orders, perhaps he shouldn't issue EOs that empower judges to send people to prison simply for going to work at their jobs.

Yep. The best that can be said for Abbott in all this is that he's better than blue-state governors, which is a pretty low bar.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (H5knJ)

366 I like Derpico because these aren't bad cops because they are fat (although that does not indicate dedication or speak well of their ability to do the job) but because they are power mad idiots.

Not that most of the young ones will know who Serpico was.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (KZzsI)

367 Jake and the Fatter Man

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:43 PM (Eicbe)

368 These guys have a Donut Resuscitate order.
Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM


*golf clap*

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (ejd/p)

369 Heft, he's a fat mutha (shut yo mouth)

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (+7yf7)

370
You do know that the Governor has little power over County Judges here in Texas right?

They are elected and are pretty much autonomous within their County.


The only people who can really reign them in is the County Commissioners, but we are talking Dallas County here, so that ain't happening.
Posted by: Mr. Scott (Formerly GWS) at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (JUOKG)


Abbott is just posturing. He's not strong. If he were strong he'd cancel all restrictions.........retroactive to any arrests because of it.

Posted by: Sooner at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (Fs5vw)

371 They look and move like fucking penguins in those vests.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (o2MD2)

372 That judge looks like a complete fagtard with that mask on.

Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (NWiLs)

373 Hill Street Goo

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (Boy/L)

374 A Fridge Too Far

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (Eicbe)

375 I also like how the fatty on the left is already mouth-breathing from the arduous task of standing erect.

Posted by: Citizen Cake at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (HmZuC)

376 The Boys in Company C rations.

Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (hHxp2)

377 "Hey, I'll have you all know I am now slightly less fat!


Posted by: Wyatt Earp"


Shouldn't that be Wide Earp?

Posted by: Sheriff Buffet T Justice at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (Tnijr)

378 I've gotta admit, I'm not very impressed with gubner Abbott. He's the fella that banned golf courses from being open, after some Karen whined about Rich White People getting to violate the Stay At Home edict.
***
Posted by: GnuBreed at May 06, 2020 03:34 PM (Z4rgH)


Hmm- Our golf course stayed open the whole time, tho the driving range was briefly closed.
I think Abbott's good and has moved fairly quickly to open up businesses. We went out to a restaurant in Austin last week and salons etc are opening this Friday. I wish he lifted all restrictions last week but Im not in charge.

Posted by: LASue at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (Ed8Zd)

379 doughboys were WW1 soldiers ... but these boys with armored toys look more like the Pillsbury Doughboys ...

Posted by: illiniwek at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (Cus5s)

380 >>Fat Boys, Fat Boys. Whatca gonna do?

Can't catch me you fat tub of goo.

Posted by: JackStraw at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (ZLI7S)

381
Your sheriff is so fat...

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (mht8P)

382 Be vewy quiet, we're hunting doughnuts...

Posted by: klaftern at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (RuIsu)

383 We hope the judiciary holds the executive accountable.

We are seeing the results of the judiciary indulging their inner Nazi.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (2BgZB)

384 I'll give you three guesses to try and figure out who was working from home with full pay and benefits before being called in to deal with the lawbreakers.

Posted by: Moron Robbie saw a man remove his mask to sneeze at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (L+kF6)

385 When the police care more about the citizenry than their pensions, then I'll reconsider my non-support of them.
Posted by: RickZ at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (Y8PSl)

I hope you're young.

The police (mostly) openly despise the citizenry, hold them in contempt, treat them poorly and do all that they can to spit in the faces of the public. There are exceptions, of course, and we should single them out for praise. (The cops not following illegal orders as happened in Harris County in TX is a good example.) But as for the rest? Americans can and should return the favor. Maybe then they will learn to give us the same level of respect they keep demanding we give them.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (zqhdn)

386 Is that one fatass wearing a tablecloth for a shirt?

Posted by: Marcus T at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (VpIIl)

387 They're not fat they're big boned!

Posted by: Eric Cartman at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (+7yf7)

388 329
The bar owner should have just ran away.

Posted by: Marcus T at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (VpIIl)
A fast walk would have sufficed. 100yds and those pudgy bastards would be out of breath, covered in sweat reaching for their phones for the nearest Buckees for a slurpee.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (N39Ws)

389 Ok boys. Mayor says we need to fatten the curve, so, come out with your hams up.

Posted by: Chief Wiggum at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (iMfep)

390 Tanzania President Cancels $10billion Chinese Loan; Refers To The Terms And Conditions As One That Can Only Be Accepted By Drunkard Person.


Uh ... who originally accepted the loan, President of Tanzania? Hmm?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at May 06, 2020 03:40 PM (J4SfM)
-----------------------------------

China has billions of dollars out there in "loans" to 3rd world countries through its Belt & Road Initiative or whatever it's called. It's a not so subtle way to take over those countries by putting them in debt forever to China.

This might get interesting if the 3rd world countries decide, eh why bother paying back those loans? If a majority of those countries don't pay, what does China do? Invade the continent? Especially since Africans in China itself are being treated like the 3rd class citizens the Chinese believe them to be?

For the Wuhan Plague Virus that China has unleashed on the world, every country should repudiate its debt with China.

Posted by: Boots at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (oGBso)

391 >>>Shouldn't that be Wide Earp?



LOL, nice. I'm actually 5'9", 180, but the gym closure added five more pounds. Rat bastards.

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (bkUtD)

392 Serpico was a really good movie, btw.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (gd9RK)

393 CHiPs

Posted by: bicentennialguy at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (vg8iE)

394 Hog Day Afternoon

Posted by: Lady in Black, sans mask at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (O+I8R)

395 I expect the day is coming, Jesus told us to expect that, after all.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (KZzsI)



I never thought Christians would be complicit in it, though.

Posted by: grammie winger at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (lwiT4)

396 372 That judge looks like a complete fagtard with that mask on.
Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (NWiLs)

--------

He does look stupid.

What? The microphone is going to get Covid? What a preening jackass.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (jUVms)

397 Wattling Tall.

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (o2MD2)

398 Saving Private Fryin'

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (oVJmc)

399 Tonsmoke

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (Boy/L)

400 There is enough good ideas here to write a funny letter to the editor filled with more insults than a jelly donut.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (r+sAi)

401 266 I thought Brian Dennehey was dead.
Posted by: RedMindBlueState


That is an insult to Brian Dennehey. I guarandamntee you neither of those guys couple play a convincing iceberg in Titanic. They have no range.

Posted by: Moki at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (mFoNl)

402 Sadler (the writer of Ballad of the Green Beret) had an... interesting life.

On seeing Sadler, Bellamy fled to his van. It was at that time, Sadler testified, that he saw a flash of metal. Believing it to be a gun, he fired one shot. The bullet struck Bellamy right between the eyes, and he died several hours later in a Nashville hospital.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (A5zUN)

403 Looks like you boys have lost the battle of the bulge.

Posted by: Count de Monet at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (q1Pj5)

404 389
Ok boys. Mayor says we need to fatten the curve, so, come out with your hams up.


Posted by: Chief Wiggum at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM (iMfep)

lol

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (KnJdm)

405 Gunfight at the Golden Corral

Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (NWiLs)

406 Gives entirely new meaning to "rolling heavy".

Posted by: rhomboid at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (El6T/)

407 Doc Hollandaise

Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (hHxp2)

408 Karen ticket:
https://tinyurl.com/yamtgvyj

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (hYcqw)

409
Girthy ... and not in a pleasing manner.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (pNxlR)

410

Need to find a way to disbar these people.

O'Keefe, where are you?

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (8fB/R)

411 Hams Across America.

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (bkUtD)

412 I was always under the impression that an *executive order* was an order by the head of an executive branch to *an agent of the executive branch*.

They have NO FORCE OF LAW on US citizens. The president can give an executive order to the INS or the FBI or the military. The governor can order state officials. He can't give an executive order to a private citizen!

What the fuck? Despite the "pen-and-phone" arrogance, even Obama managed to not overstep the line on this most of the time.

Posted by: anonymous at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (+G8SK)

413 To be fair, they'd blow out the suspension on a regular cop cruiser so they took the armored car

Posted by: kbdabear at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (qAR6u)

414 Scene from The Battle of Pork Chop Ridge.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (ptqGC)

415
Well I, for one, hold that judge in complete and utter contempt.

In what way is he NOT contemptible?

Posted by: Parker at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (zV/fi)

416 357 I've had enough of this shit.

End. It. Now.
Posted by: Ladyl

I've pretty much given up on the "Enough" guy making an appearance. I thought Trump would be the "enough" guy, but that hasn't exactly panned out.

Posted by: Dan Smoot's Apprentice at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (H8QX8)

417 Ten years ago a crack kitchen commando unit was sent to prison by a culinary court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum-security dishwashing room to the Texas underground. Today, still wanted by the Food Nazis, they survive as omnivores of fortune. If you have a full fridge (or garbage can)... if no one else can help... and if you can find them... maybe you can hire... The Andouille-Team.

Posted by: Pendulating Richard at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (d6DSt)

418 >>>Doc Hollandaise



You owe me a new keyboard!

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (bkUtD)

419 CHIPS: Chocolate Honeyglaze Iced Pastries

Posted by: BurtTC at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (hku12)

420 The Teats of San Francisco

Posted by: andycanuck at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (TQ/zJ)

421 LASue, Luther has an attorney and he was all over the radio this morning. She is in capable hands.

Posted by: Ben Had at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (R6g1s)

422 21 Plump Street

Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (NWiLs)

423 The thick blue line.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (KnJdm)

424 Inglorious Fat Turds

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (oVJmc)

425
Fat Boys Fat Boys
whatcha gonna do?
whatcha gonna do
when they come for you?

Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (iTXRQ)

426 God. Meal Team Six, that is pure poetry.

Posted by: Picric at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (yj09K)

427 If making fun of some jelly-bellied softboys with Rambo fantasies makes them think twice about using excessive force to impose unconstitutional laws on law-abiding citizens, then let the sick burns flow.

Aye.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (8fB/R)

428
Rrrrrrrrr! Taken out many a doughnut shop, have ye, me brave boys?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (pNxlR)

429 There has to be a loophole for the governor not to have to ask the judge. Jails around here just let people out on their own volition if the beds run low.

Posted by: Menack at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (buTO7)

430 The XL-Files

Posted by: bicentennialguy at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (vg8iE)

431 Gravy Seals

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (oVJmc)

432 Every! Where! There's lots of Piggies, living Piggie lives, clutching Forks and Knives. To Eat! Their! Bacon!

Posted by: Frankie Lee at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (7YqDN)

433 The police (mostly) openly despise the citizenry, hold them in contempt, treat them poorly and do all that they can to spit in the faces of the public. There are exceptions, of course, and we should single them out for praise. (The cops not following illegal orders as happened in Harris County in TX is a good example.) But as for the rest? Americans can and should return the favor. Maybe then they will learn to give us the same level of respect they keep demanding we give them.

---

Yup. Try open carrying legally in Arlington, VA. Cops there have been warned 10,000,000 times and they STILL get off on harassing people doing it.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (2BgZB)

434 Tombstone... Pizzas

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (A5zUN)

435 Eat Bobby Flay

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (Boy/L)

436 Gunfight at the Golden Corral
Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (NWiLs)


May I substitute: Gutfight

Posted by: BurtTC at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (hku12)

437 Just the fats, ma'am.

Posted by: pep at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (T6t7i)

438 https://www.whitehouse.gov/live/
4pm EDT (10 minutes from now)
Press Secretary Kayleigh McEnany Holds a Briefing

Posted by: m at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (O3A5V)

439 O/T Facebook announces members of content Supreme Court.

NOW can we treat them like a publisher, not a platform, stripping them of protections they've been hiding behind?

Posted by: Lizzy at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (bDqIh)

440
The Judge is a JEF sniffer.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (8fB/R)

441 If Governor Abbott doesn't want totalitarian abuses like Odessa and Dallas, he shouldn't be issuing totalitarian lockdown orders. He enabled this.

Posted by: cool breeze at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (UGKMd)

442 Support Your Local Sheriff, starring James Garner and a dockyard crane.

Posted by: Citizen Cake at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (HmZuC)

443 Those kevlar vests seem a little strained to contain.

Posted by: Northernlurker at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (Uu+Jp)

444 That guy is so fat, he broke his leg and gravy poured out.

Posted by: Somewhere on Ventura Highway at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (M+Lyo)

445 Grease Officers.

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (bkUtD)

446 Doc Hollandaise
Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (hHxp2)
+++++++++++
Bravo.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (hYcqw)

447 209 He has to keep doing this but where is the Texas legislature? Why are
they not dealing with these judges? That's part of their job.------------
No.
They won't be back in session for another year and half.
This is really on Abbot for his stupid order that he wanted the people to follow, but not to really be enforced (else it would come back on him). Dont' give an order you don't want enforced.
Posted by: SH at May 06, 2020 03:33 PM (sX1BW)

Again, it must be understood that Texas is VERY decentralized. As you pointed out, the Texas Legislature is only given 140 days every odd numbered year to meddle in our lives. And the judiciary is not appointed by the Legislature. The judges in TX are voted on by the vote of the people.
Believe me: the ballot in major cities in a typical general election is FULL of judges in various courts on various levels.
Mr. Moye is in office as a judge due to a vote of the people. If he isn't voted out of office in November the people in his district in Dallas County deserve all the crap Mr. Moye can give them.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (zqhdn)

448 Harry Fatter and the Pizza Stone.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (r+sAi)

449
Hambone and Mash(ed 'Taters)

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (pNxlR)

450 I never thought Christians would be complicit in it, though.
Posted by: grammie winger at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (lwiT4)
------------

They either are not Christians or have a very poor understanding of the Bible.

Just more masks being ripped off.

Corona also made it abundantly clear cops are okay with doing whatever those in charge tell them to do.

Which means cops will confiscate firearms when they are told to.

Katrina and NO were not an aberration.

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing
at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (WEBkv)

451 Not sure it would have worked here - the "violators" didn't look like triathletes themselves - but a perfect hilarious move would have been for the "perps" to jog away from the lardasses, just trot in a big circle around the area, taunting them to catch up.

Posted by: rhomboid at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (El6T/)

452 424 Inglorious Fat Turds
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 03:48 PM (oVJmc
------


hahahahaha!

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (ptqGC)

453 There's Something about Mary's Donuts

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (A5zUN)

454 436
Gunfight at the Golden Corral

Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (NWiLs)





May I substitute: Gutfight

Posted by: BurtTC at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (hku12)

Guntfight, and you have a winner.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (KnJdm)

455 436 Gunfight at the Golden Corral
Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (NWiLs)


May I substitute: Gutfight
Posted by: BurtTC at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (hku12)

Meet you halfway with Guntfight

Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (NWiLs)

456
Tonight on DRAGASS
"I'm Sargent Friday. I carry a fork."

Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (iTXRQ)

457 Really Big Jake

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (Boy/L)

458
Once More Unto The Peach...Cobbler

Posted by: Soothsayer at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (dGzLr)

459 Meal Team 6 joins Tank Abrams on tour

Posted by: vmom 2020 at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (G546f)

460 Jake and the Fat Man

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (A5zUN)

461 Can Abbot not just commute or pardon? Genuine question, no idea about TX law.

Also, those cops are horrible, and should be fired. But unions and pensions keeps them going despite being grotesquely out of shape.

Posted by: Nick in Tallahassee at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (svbBD)

462 Hardgristle and McCormack-Schmick

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (DjiZK)

463 Walking Fat

Posted by: Count de Monet at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (q1Pj5)

464 "Honestly, every distance runner in California should be sure to do their runs on the beach. Those fatties on the police force will never catch them and it's hilarious to watch."

Running on the beach sucks. But the cops couldn't catch me on the street either.

Posted by: Dave in Fla (The girls with thong bikinis were on the beach last weekend) at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (5p7BC)

465 430 The XL-Files

LOL!

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (+7yf7)

466 Nice LAV, guys!

[Lasagna Access Van for the civvies out there.]

Posted by: andycanuck at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (TQ/zJ)

467 Wow. I just realized that Biden could be the first president ever to Arkancide.

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (Eicbe)

468 Buzzfeed is furloughing 68 employees without pay for three months starting May 16th.

https://preview.tinyurl.com/ybsy5osv

Posted by: bonhomme at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (UW2ZS)

469 once in a blue moon i get a good one off

Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (hHxp2)

470 1917 (lbs)

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (oVJmc)

471 The Modular Squad

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (Boy/L)

472 These wanna-be dictators are NEVER going to give up their power. So it's going to be CV19 4EVAH.

/get used to the boot on your neck, never eating out again, never going to a show and bad haircuts... forever.

Posted by: shibumi, living in CV1984 at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (ZCiJZ)

473 Posted by: anonymous at May 06, 2020 03:47 PM (+G8SK)

Turns out that most states have laws on the books saying once a 'National Emergency' or State of Emergency is declared, the Governor can do just about anything he wants.

Now, how that passes Constitutional standards? It falls under the 'the Constitution is not a suicide pact' so we can just F'n ignore it when we want' rule.

Posted by: Romeo13 at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (NgKpN)

474 The Load Warrior.

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (bkUtD)

475 Bridge over the Rhubarb Pie

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (A5zUN)

476 The XL-Files

LOL!
Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (+7yf7)
---
You're going to need a few more Xs.

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (Eicbe)

477
Ector County Sheriffs so fat that when they told, "haul ass", it takes two trips

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (pNxlR)

478 Your sheriff is so fat...
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:45 PM


His blood type is Haagen Dazs.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (ejd/p)

479 C-SPAN link
https://tinyurl.com/yafws83x

Posted by: m at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (O3A5V)

480 Sharing Plates at Ryan's

Posted by: Moron Robbie saw a man remove his mask to sneeze at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (L+kF6)

481 Adam-120DDD

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (2BgZB)

482 Fat bastards (Looking for)

Hannibal Glaze and Kid Curry

Posted by: Rex B at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (Ec72r)

483

Starkist and Dinner Hutch

Posted by: Pendulating Richard at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (d6DSt)

484
Give me liberty, or give me Death By Chocolate

Posted by: Soothsayer at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (dGzLr)

485 Crosswalk Karen
https://tinyurl.com/yd64fh45
Posted by: redridinghood at May 06, 2020 03:27 PM


* consults AoSHQ Situation Handbook *

* flips to page 117 *

"Calm your tits"

Posted by: Duncanthrax at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (DMUuz)

486 An Officer and a Rack of Lamb

Posted by: A dude in MI at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (/6GbT)

487 Belly's Heroes

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (oVJmc)

488 The Judge ORDERED her to comply with the executive order.

When she did not, he said that was contempt of the Court.

Catch-22
Posted by: Romeo13 at May 06, 2020 03:41 PM (NgKpN)

I believe the judge ordered her to apologize and promise to comply in the future. When she refused, he sentenced her for contempt. IMO, he should have fined her or whatever and released her. Ordering her to apologize (not even to "victims" but to government officials!!) was BS and an abuse of discretion.

Posted by: LASue at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (Ed8Zd)

489 As Paulie Walnuts would say, they look like one of those weight-loss ads. Before...and WAY before!

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (+7yf7)

490 Cannon.

No, that's it. Just Cannon.

Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (NWiLs)

491 Maybe try taking down a Salad Bar, Officer?

Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (J7qMc)

492 The Wrongest Day

Posted by: Moron Robbie saw a man remove his mask to sneeze at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (L+kF6)

493 468 Buzzfeed is furloughing 68 employees without pay for three months starting May 16th.

https://preview.tinyurl.com/ybsy5osv
Posted by: bonhomme at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (UW2ZS)

=========

My cat gifs!

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (UWqZJ)

494 Bullet proof vests on the morbidly obese is a waste of taxpayer dollars.

Posted by: Anna Puma at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (H2ofG)

495 Probable Cause (of diabetes)

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (xfb67)

496 The Big Fed One.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (2BgZB)

497 Slaw and Order

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (Boy/L)

498 Not sure it would have worked here - the "violators"
didn't look like triathletes themselves - but a perfect hilarious move
would have been for the "perps" to jog away from the lardasses, just
trot in a big circle around the area, taunting them to catch up.

Posted by: rhomboid at May 06, 2020 03:49 PM (El6T/)


Rule #1: Cardio

Posted by: Columbus at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (q1Pj5)

499 Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (KnJdm)

Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:50 PM (NWiLs)


Guntfight.

Behold the Horde hive mind, down to the minute, in all its scary glory.

Even Marlin Perkins wouldn't take on such critters.

Posted by: RickZ at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (Y8PSl)

500
Can Abbot not just commute or pardon? Genuine question, no idea about TX law.

No. Texas governor is a remarkably weak office.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (mht8P)

501 >>>His blood type is Haagen Dazs.


Oh Henry-Positive.

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (bkUtD)

502 . I wish he lifted all restrictions last week but Im not in charge.
Posted by: LASue at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (Ed8Zd)


That's just it. You are of the people. YOU are in charge of your public servants.

Posted by: Sooner at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (Fs5vw)

503 300

Size 54 Where Are You?
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 03:39 PM (s2VJv)

{{{golf clap}}}

Posted by: browndog at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (gD6Ka)

504 270 Why can't Abbott just pardon her and commute the fine?
Posted by: Ghost of Lee Atwater at May 06, 2020 03:36 PM (mdRoh)

He has no power to pardon as such. Her pardon has to go through a committee (IIRC, via the TDCJ) and she will be recommended to him for a pardon. Nor can he commute the fine.

The TX governorship is among the weakest in the country. By design. Thank you, Edmund J. Davis.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (zqhdn)

505 My cat gifs!
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:52 PM (UWqZJ)

-------

HAHHAHAHAH

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (jUVms)

506 The Thick Blue Line

Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (NWiLs)

507 "The Big Fed One"

Posted by: blake - semi lurker in marginal standing
at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (WEBkv)

508 Reminds me of when the alien in Independence Day told his captors to RELEEEEEEEAAAAASSSSSSSEEEEEE MEEEEE!

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (k4dH2)

509 MannaTeam Six

Posted by: stumck at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (w9Wax)

510 Cannon-TNG.

Posted by: klaftern at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (RuIsu)

511 >>>Belly's Heroes


Stop, just stop. Literally crying over here!

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (bkUtD)

512 Blood type: Poutine

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (+7yf7)

513 No, that's it. Just Cannon.

William Conrad would, at times, try to chase people on foot. It was always hilarious.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (Boy/L)

514 Did you guys see the Fat Fascist Sheriff's response to the uproar?

It was basically:

1. I'm pro 2nd amendment
2. This isn't a 2nd amendment issue
3. Those people I pointed guns at were from out of town
4. Hey, don't blame me, I just enforce the law
5. If you want to protest somebody, protest the Governor, he made me do it

Posted by: bonhomme at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (UW2ZS)

515 504. Thank you. I asked the same.

Posted by: Nick in Tallahassee at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (svbBD)

516 Buzzfeed is furloughing 68 employees without pay for three months starting May 16th.

https://preview.tinyurl.com/ybsy5osv
Posted by: bonhomme at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (UW2ZS)
---
Learn2FOAD

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (Eicbe)

517 Even Kim Jong Un thinks these guys are fat.

Posted by: Ghost of Lee Atwater at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (mdRoh)

518 My respect for law enforcement and the court system has absolutely cratered.

Posted by: Cato, Collectivism Delenda Est at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (J+mig)

519 Those guys don't really even need the weapons. Just one plopping on top of you would do the trick. Both of them, you're dead.

Posted by: washrivergal at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (lmUUv)

520 *Sings*

Fat Guy
in a
Little Vest

Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (I3nir)

521


"Remember the A La Mode!"
-Davy Crockpot

Posted by: Soothsayer at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (dGzLr)

522 If these guys are my cops I think I will call the Canadian Stormtrooper first.

Posted by: Mallamutt, The State of Illinois says I am essential. at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (iGB4T)

523 It's truly outrageous that a judge has chosen to enforce my executive order in a way that was entirely predictable from the get-go given the number of urban blue jurisdictions in Texas. But that other guy is to blame. It's all his fault.

Posted by: Gregg Abbott at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (H5knJ)

524 Hawaii 5-0-0

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (Boy/L)

525 The Not-so-thin Blue Line

Adam 12-ton

The Po-po platter

Posted by: Lizzy at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (bDqIh)

526 Blobocop.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (2BgZB)

527 The Fat Schists.

Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (Eicbe)

528 Re: Crosswalk Karen.

How hard is it not to block the f*cking crosswalk, asshoe?

Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (4BMGG)

529 Those two officers used to ride in a Crown Vic until the tires exploded and the axel broke.

Posted by: Anna Puma at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (H2ofG)

530 522 If these guys are my cops I think I will call the Canadian Stormtrooper first.
Posted by: Mallamutt, The State of Illinois says I am essential. at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (iGB4T)

=========

She's cuter, at least.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (UWqZJ)

531 This is what happens when "walking the beat " is replaced with "segwaying the beat"

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 06, 2020 03:55 PM (d7Ww2)

532 Hogan's Hero Sandwiches

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:55 PM (A5zUN)

533 O/T but sad:

Founding member of the German group Kraftwerk, Florian Schneider, has died at 73 (link goes to Reuters):

https://tinyurl.com/y79cct9z

".. die Autobahn..."

Posted by: gdgm+ at May 06, 2020 03:55 PM (ExnWy)

534 If not for the vests the moob jiggling would have been spectacular and stomach turning.

Posted by: Northernlurker at May 06, 2020 03:55 PM (Uu+Jp)

535 Buzzfeed is furloughing 68 employees without pay for three months starting May 16th.

https://preview.tinyurl.com/ybsy5osv

Posted by: bonhomme at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (UW2ZS)
----------------------------

They can still work from home for free, right?
15 Awesome Ways to Spend Your Furlough Days!


Posted by: Boots at May 06, 2020 03:55 PM (oGBso)

536 5. If you want to protest somebody, protest the Governor, he made me do it
Posted by: bonhomme at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (UW2ZS)
+++++++++++++
Solzhenitsyn has something to say about that.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 06, 2020 03:55 PM (hYcqw)

537 uzzfeed is furloughing 68 employees without pay for three months starting May 16th.

https://preview.tinyurl.com/ybsy5osv
Posted by: bonhomme at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (UW2ZS)
---
Learn2FOAD
Posted by: Axeman at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (Eic

with all their firings and layoffs and furloughs, who is left to tell me about this one great trick that only insiders know!?

Posted by: LASue at May 06, 2020 03:55 PM (Ed8Zd)

538 You Morons are killin' me here. I really needed the laugh today.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (ejd/p)

539 How hard is it not to block the f*cking crosswalk, asshoe?
Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (4BMGG)

--------

He stopped because of the train. It happens, I've done it, you think you're going to move forward way out of the crosswalk and the bells start.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (jUVms)

540 533 O/T but sad:

Founding member of the German group Kraftwerk, Florian Schneider, has died at 73 (link goes to Reuters):


Trans-Europe Express to Heaven

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (+7yf7)

541 Those guys musta eaten the last coupla people they arrested.

GET IN MA BELLY!!!

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (4tEsR)

542 The Stew Centurions

Posted by: andycanuck at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (TQ/zJ)

543

Doublewide Harry - Do you feel hungry, punk? Go ahead make my meal.

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (Yiclb)

544 Buzzfeed is furloughing 68 employees without pay for three months starting May 16th.

https://preview.tinyurl.com/ybsy5osv
Posted by: bonhomme at May 06, 2020 03:51 PM (UW2ZS)
---
Learn2FOAD
Posted by: Axeman


#Learn2Farm

Posted by: rickb223 at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (At/8G)

545 Buzzfeed is furloughing 68 employees without pay for three months starting May 16th.

Enjoy your staycation, turdburglars.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (H5knJ)

546 I'm controllink.

And composink.


RIP Florian.

Posted by: eleven at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (Qf83p)

547
Pie Noon.

Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (iTXRQ)

548 Adam-1200

Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (NWiLs)

549 Just got this text:
I have dealt with over sixty incoming emails already today! What, a little rain and everybody comes in from gardening?!

Posted by: SMOD at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (3aI0K)

550 The James Madison, go to YouTube and search for Puma Sisters Dance.

Nyah.

Posted by: Anna Puma at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (H2ofG)

551 528
Re: Crosswalk Karen.



How hard is it not to block the f*cking crosswalk, asshoe?

Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (4BMGG)

I guess it is easier than that lard-ass walking her fat ass a couple extra steps around the front of the car.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (KnJdm)

552 Have Gunt, Will Waddle

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (A5zUN)

553 Kayleigh McEnany
@PressSec
·
18m
I will be taking the podium at 4:00 p.m. ET

Posted by: m at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (O3A5V)

554 The Fat and the Furriest?


Nah, that's reaching.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (2BgZB)

555

Star Trek: Red Circus Tents

Posted by: Pendulating Richard at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (d6DSt)

556 Founding member of the German group Kraftwerk, Florian Schneider, has died at 73 (link goes to Reuters):

https://tinyurl.com/y79cct9z

".. die Autobahn..."
===

COVID, natch.

Posted by: bicentennialguy at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (vg8iE)

557 "Meal Team Six" sounds like it could work as a Netflix series. A combination of Reno 911, Hell's Kitchen and the Dukes of Hazard.

Posted by: Mr. Barky at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (hKi6n)

558 Founding member of the German group Kraftwerk, Florian Schneider, has died at 73 (link goes to Reuters):

Craig Ferguson used to do a Kraftwerk bit. It was funny.

Late night used to have funny people.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (Boy/L)

559 The tank does sort of make more sense now though.
No way the suspension on a normal squad car could survive those two.

Posted by: SH at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (sX1BW)

560 Crosswalk Karen would have been Asphalt Sally when all 5'6'' 120 of me got through with her.

She needs her butt kicked.

Posted by: Miss Issippi at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (LIhNq)

561 Yeah - Abbott's hands ain't clean. Anybody could see that certain mayors and cops would use his statewide order to release their inner fascist.

Well - anybody not willfully blind at least.

Posted by: Just How Things Are at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (K4eq3)

562

They have an APB out for their peni - last seen in 2007...

Posted by: Pendulating Richard at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (d6DSt)

563 Tough guy: After these guys went into the bar there were 600 lbs. of rotting spare ribs going to waste.

Naive kid: 600 lbs? I thought there were a 1000 lbs of ribs in the bar?

Tough guy: *tosses coffee into fire* There were.

Posted by: BurtTC at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (hku12)

564 Transfat Max - the dough warrior

Posted by: A dude in MI at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (/6GbT)

565 TJ Pressure Cooker

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (DjiZK)

566 Stop! - or I'll Chew!

Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (I3nir)

567 Cannon

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (aKsyK)

568 370
You do know that the Governor has little power over County Judges here in Texas right?

They are elected and are pretty much autonomous within their County.


The only people who can really reign them in is the County Commissioners, but we are talking Dallas County here, so that ain't happening.
Posted by: Mr. Scott (Formerly GWS) at May 06, 2020 03:26 PM (JUOKG)


Abbott is just posturing. He's not strong. If he were strong he'd cancel all restrictions.........retroactive to any arrests because of it.
Posted by: Sooner at May 06, 2020 03:44 PM (Fs5vw)

Actually, the Dallas County judge (for you non-Texans, that's like a mayor of a county) is a whacked out tyrant who was so out of control he sufficiently pissed off the Commissioner's Court (for you non-Texans, a county equivalent of City Council) such that they voted to rein him in.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (zqhdn)

569 Buzzfeed is furloughing 68 employees without pay for three months starting May 16th.
______________

They aren't being furloughed, they're being fun-loughed.

Kinda like funemployment, but without the benefits.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (k4dH2)

570 GUNTER

Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (I3nir)

571 "I will be taking the podium at 4:00 p.m. ET"

Mmmm.

Sounds kinky.

Posted by: rhomboid at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (El6T/)

572 I smell bacon. Extra greasy.

Posted by: Diesel Jones at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (0CeRG)

573 NCIS - Numerous Carbohydrates In System

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (2BgZB)

574 537 . . . with all their firings and layoffs and furloughs, who is left to tell me about this one great trick that only insiders know!?
Posted by: LASue
_________

I could help you out, but casinos hate me.

Posted by: Famous Gut Doctor Who Is Begging You To Throw Out That Vegetable at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (9vQJW)

575 For A Few Donuts More

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (dfRN6)

576 Wonder how tough she'd act when staring down the business end of a firearm. As that crazy Karen was winding up for her second punch, I'd be reaching for the firearm.

That would absolutely guarantee a visit by the authorities in SWAT gear, tanks and crew served weapons. Do you think that she would be the least bit honest in describing the sequence of events?

Best to just grab her by the throat as she prepares to enter the car space and violently pull her face into the upper door frame. Repeat as deemed necessary.

Cops are pretty used to giving "tune-ups" to certain people using the same method. "Oops, in all the excitement she must have bumped her head". So they would recognize what is going on pretty quick.

Posted by: 🐧 at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (C+evo)

577 Damn, they have some tubbies there. Maybe layoff the BBQ and eat some salad or go keto or something.

Posted by: David LeBlanc at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (yc3le)

578 557 "Meal Team Six" sounds like it could work as a Netflix series. A combination of Reno 911, Hell's Kitchen and the Dukes of Hazard.
Posted by: Mr. Barky at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (hKi6n)

Until they had Amy Schumer as Daisy.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (A5zUN)

579 I will be taking the podium at 4:00 p.m. ET

MSNBCNNN: "White House Press Secretary admits to plot to steal government property."

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (Boy/L)

580 CHIPS


Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (I3nir)

581 Good news, but ...she got into the spotlight, what about those who get abused and don't have the means to fight the state ?

Posted by: runner at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (zr5Kq)

582 Graveheart.

Posted by: ShainS, COVID-1984 survivor at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (6pvkK)

583 I never really liked the Ballad of the Green Beret. I side more with Gen Patton: job isn't to die for your country but make the other guy die for his.

Posted by: Mr. Barky at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (hKi6n)

584 577
Damn, they have some tubbies there. Maybe layoff the BBQ and eat some salad or go keto or something.

Posted by: David LeBlanc at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (yc3le)

Ev-er-y-thing is bigger in Texas.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (KnJdm)

585 Abbott should have just pardoned her and told Judge Mao to LOLGF

Posted by: Deepelemblues at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (F/1y/)

586 Fat Patrol - Now in Color

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (DjiZK)

587 The Pounds of the Baskervilles (although Ace didn't like it).

Posted by: andycanuck at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (TQ/zJ)

588 566 Stop! - or I'll Chew!
Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 03:58 PM (I3nir)

Stop or My Mom will Eat You!

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (A5zUN)

589

Dr. Google said they were Leptin deficient.

So they ate Leptin.

All of it.

Posted by: Pendulating Richard at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (d6DSt)

590 NYPD Blueberry Muffin.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (s2VJv)

591 Law and Order A Triple Large Milkshake

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (2BgZB)

592 For A Few Donuts More
A Fistful of Donuts

Posted by: andycanuck at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (TQ/zJ)

593 The Cellu-Light Infantry

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (+7yf7)

594 Maybe some good will come out of this chi-com crud hysteria. Maybe, just maybe, people will realize how smart our founding fathers were, and acknowledge that we, as a nation, have allowed our liberties to be usurped.
And, perhaps, we will reclaim our birthright as free Americans, and gutter-stomp the progressive scum into irrelevance. Maybe. Hope springs eternal, and it is a sin to despair, so let us carry on, remembering that fortune favors the brave., and that our enemies can't jump high enough to bite our asses!

Posted by: eastofsuez at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (U2zca)

595 Predictably, since the left has no defense, the tweet responses are now defaulted to - "bet the governor wouldnt care if it was a black guy!"

Posted by: Menack at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (buTO7)

596 Adipose-12

Posted by: Turn Two at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (+AVpa)

597 FRY HARD II

Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (I3nir)

598 >>GUNTER

GLIEBEN

Posted by: JackStraw at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (ZLI7S)

599
The Eat Hardy Boys...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (s2VJv)

600 Adam 12 on the Richter Scale.

Posted by: klaftern at May 06, 2020 04:01 PM (RuIsu)

601 Porker, Texas Ranger

Posted by: bicentennialguy at May 06, 2020 04:01 PM (vg8iE)

602 595 Predictably, since the left has no defense, the tweet responses are now defaulted to - "bet the governor wouldnt care if it was a black guy!"
Posted by: Menack at May 06, 2020 04:00 PM (buTO7)

========

Listen, fat, we're in the middle of our war on women. Don't try and confuse us.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 04:01 PM (UWqZJ)

603 cameras running at the C-SPAN link

https://preview.tinyurl.com/ybnpn2cx

Posted by: m at May 06, 2020 04:01 PM (O3A5V)

604 S.W.A.T.
Sweaty,

Wheezing,

And

Tired

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 04:01 PM (oVJmc)

605
Roasted: Dead or Alive

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:01 PM (s2VJv)

606 The Wider

Posted by: stumck at May 06, 2020 04:01 PM (w9Wax)

607 No Country for Thin Men

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:01 PM (A5zUN)

608 Diet Hard

Posted by: Count de Monet at May 06, 2020 04:01 PM (q1Pj5)

609 Heh, you guys are good.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 04:01 PM (jUVms)

610

Gunt-Smoke

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (s2VJv)

611 I wonder how the fat boise feel about being on film in all their morbidly obese glory?

Posted by: Xipe Totec at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (o2MD2)

612 S.F.A.T.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (+7yf7)

613 "Gowan out dare Buford, while I covah ya from dis shade heah".

Posted by: BluesFish at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (WQZ1O)

614 And, perhaps, we will reclaim our birthright as free Americans, and gutter-stomp the progressive scum into irrelevance


==


covid 19 will create many cosrevatives

Posted by: runner at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (zr5Kq)

615 There Will Be Beer

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (A5zUN)

616

High Cholesterol Drifter

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (s2VJv)

617 You have the right to remain delicious
anything you serve will be eaten in the front seat of our tank
you have the right to a menu
you have the right to your server being present while ordering
if you cannot afford dessert, dessert will be ordered for you

Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (iTXRQ)

618 *conservatives

Posted by: runner at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (zr5Kq)

619 Walker: Texas Grazer.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (2BgZB)

620 Re: Crosswalk Karen.



How hard is it not to block the f*cking crosswalk, asshoe?

Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 06, 2020 03:54 PM (4BMGG)

I guess it is easier than that lard-ass walking her fat ass a couple extra steps around the front of the car.
Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 03:56 PM (KnJdm)
***********
I have ended up over a crosswalk not on purpose, but because the light turned red.

Posted by: redridinghood at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (wiXsO)

621 Sheriff sounds incredibly stupid, and should be advised of The First Rule of Holes.

Haven't kept up with LA County - sheriff there announced closure of gun stores the day of the first state-wide lockdown crap here - and was instantly backed off by the county counsel, who presumably (like a large portion of the serving "legal" officialdom in the country, along with the SCOTUS) have only one goal - never never ever let a ridiculous obviously unconstitutional law or order regarding gunz rise up the judicial ladder.

Even though it has about as much chance of getting a responsible and decades-over-due ruling from SCOTUS as a healthy 30-yr old does of croaking form C-19.

I think he re-instated the order later. And the county supervisors kicked him aside from the emergency operations center - apparently for long-standing, totally unrelated reasons of Dumb Internecine Inside Baseball Governance by Elementary School Children.


Posted by: rhomboid at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (El6T/)

622 The teletubbies of ector county

Posted by: Somewhere on Ventura Highway at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (M+Lyo)

623 S.W.A.T

Sandwiches With A Turnover

Posted by: Mallamutt, The State of Illinois says I am essential. at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (iGB4T)

624 Whatt Derp is a good one too

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (KZzsI)

625
There Will Be Blood Sausage

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:03 PM (s2VJv)

626 The Seconds Infantry

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 04:03 PM (oVJmc)

627 B.J. and the Bear-Claws

Posted by: andycanuck at May 06, 2020 04:03 PM (TQ/zJ)

628 The good,the fat, and the rotund

Posted by: A dude in MI at May 06, 2020 04:03 PM (/6GbT)

629 Gunfight at the Golden Corral

Posted by: Insomniac - Ex Cineribus Resurgo at May 06, 2020 03:46 PM (NWiLs)


A. That's fucking funny.
B. Ain't you supposed to be at work?
C. That's fucking funny.

Posted by: GnuBreed at May 06, 2020 04:03 PM (Z4rgH)

630 >>There Will Be Beer

I drink your milkshake!

Posted by: JackStraw at May 06, 2020 04:03 PM (ZLI7S)

631 21 We Can't Jump Street

Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 04:03 PM (f+Irj)

632
The Good, The Bad, and The Husky

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at May 06, 2020 04:03 PM (EGyGV)

633 TJ, go high!

Um, captain?

Oh, right, TJ. Well, find a curb to stand on or something. Luca! Bring me my donut.

Posted by: Guy Smiley at May 06, 2020 04:04 PM (+7yf7)

634 The Adventures of Brisket County, Jr

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:04 PM (A5zUN)

635 The half-ton squad

Posted by: Count de Monet at May 06, 2020 04:04 PM (q1Pj5)

636
Abagofchips Now

Posted by: Easter Island Mori at May 06, 2020 04:04 PM (PtOP4)

637 Blubberlon 5

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:04 PM (A5zUN)

638 Miami Icing

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 04:04 PM (2BgZB)

639 Bun Notice

Posted by: andycanuck at May 06, 2020 04:04 PM (TQ/zJ)

640 Elliot Nestle

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 06, 2020 04:04 PM (r+sAi)

641 I have ended up over a crosswalk not on purpose, but because the light turned red.

Posted by: redridinghood at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (wiXsO)

It happens. And people giving a glaring look as they walk around the front of the car get the finger. No doubt that they would be brave if it were my wife, and they would be tempted to act like that cow.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 04:04 PM (KnJdm)

642 covid 19 will create many cosrevatives

Posted by: runner at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (zr5Kq)

Whoa, you've been drinking too much covfefe!

Posted by: Methos at May 06, 2020 04:04 PM (kOpft)

643 Governor Abbott, it was a stupid order.

You gave asshole judges power to do this shit.

I like you and would vote for you for President but you screwed the pooch on this one.

Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (jUVms)

644 Predictably, since the left has no defense, the tweet responses are now defaulted to - "bet the governor wouldnt care if it was a black guy!"

Answer: "The bigoted judge would never do that to a black guy."

Posted by: 🐧 at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (C+evo)

645 Lock, Stock, and Two Stroking Barrels.

Posted by: ShainS, COVID-1984 survivor at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (6pvkK)

646 Chicago P.D. [Pizza Delivery]

Posted by: andycanuck at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (TQ/zJ)

647 Burp Notice

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (oVJmc)

648 Homeland Cooking

Posted by: Huck Follywood, hunker in the bunker at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (NVYyb)

649 Have Gunt, Will Travel

Posted by: Sheriff Buffet T Justice at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (Tnijr)

650 Lap-band of Brothers

Posted by: Turn Two at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (+AVpa)

651 Dude, Where's My Penis?

Posted by: Count de Monet at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (q1Pj5)

652 286 All laughs aside, this is tyranny...right?

I can't believe more Texans aren't getting riled up.
Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (jUVms)

I am rather pissed off about it, but I also know and understand the way TX is structured. Ultimately, this will be up to the citizens of Ector County (county seat: Odessa). If they want to restore my faith in the system, they will toss that Sheriff out on his ear come November, and see to it that he doesn't get anywhere near law enforcement on any level again.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (zqhdn)

653 Fat Masterson

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (Boy/L)

654 The Call of the Bite Brigade

Posted by: stumck at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (w9Wax)

655 High Cholesterol Drifter

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (s2VJv)


That's a HIPAA violation, Mister.

Posted by: GnuBreed at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (Z4rgH)

656 So many of these are really, really good.

Posted by: m at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (O3A5V)

657 We're gonna make Bobby Hill proud!

Posted by: klaftern at May 06, 2020 04:06 PM (RuIsu)

658 Does this tac gear make my ass look big?

Posted by: Headless Body of Agnew at May 06, 2020 04:06 PM (e1mEI)

659 BMI: Miami

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 04:06 PM (Boy/L)

660 Dork Justice

Posted by: andycanuck at May 06, 2020 04:06 PM (TQ/zJ)

661
The Super(size) Cops

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:06 PM (s2VJv)

662 624 Whatt Derp is a good one too
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 06, 2020 04:02 PM (KZzsI)

If that's a typo for Wyatt Derp, I like that.

Posted by: m at May 06, 2020 04:06 PM (O3A5V)

663 The Fellowship of the Ring

(The Ring is a donut that whispers to the fat guys.)

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:07 PM (A5zUN)

664

Tombstone (Pizza)

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:07 PM (s2VJv)

665 Daaamn!

Posted by: Gabrial Englesias at May 06, 2020 04:07 PM (9m9TT)

666 Shit just got real fat

Posted by: RJD at May 06, 2020 04:07 PM (ucNdt)

667 585 Abbott should have just pardoned her and told Judge Mao to LOLGF
Posted by: Deepelemblues at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (F/1y/)

If only he could.

(Sheesh, I sometimes think we need to hold a seminar on TX government here.)

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 04:08 PM (zqhdn)

668 BMI: Miami

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 06, 2020 04:06 PM (Boy/L)

LOL

Posted by: ... at May 06, 2020 04:08 PM (hNjG1)

669 663 The Fellowship of the Ring

(The Ring is a donut that whispers to the fat guys.)
Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:07 PM (A5zUN)

==========

Weird subtitle.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 04:08 PM (UWqZJ)

670 650 Lap-band of Brothers
Posted by: Turn Two at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (+AVpa)

*golfclap*

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:08 PM (A5zUN)

671 High Spoon.

Posted by: ShainS, COVID-1984 survivor at May 06, 2020 04:08 PM (6pvkK)

672 Fat Masterson

Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 04:08 PM (hHxp2)

673 The Outlaw Josey Whales

Posted by: GnuBreed at May 06, 2020 04:08 PM (Z4rgH)

674

The Wild Wild Waist

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:08 PM (s2VJv)

675 Odessa Swat A1C

Posted by: Huck Follywood, hunker in the bunker at May 06, 2020 04:08 PM (NVYyb)

676 You guys are killing me! I'm still at work and my boss is still here. Trying SOOO hard not to laugh.

Posted by: Jordan61 at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (Ez6QX)

677 666
Shit just got real fat

Posted by: RJD at May 06, 2020 04:07 PM (ucNdt)

Officer 1: Jello shots fired!

Officer 2: It looks like we will have to eat our way in.


Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (KnJdm)

678 Happiness is a belt fed buffet.

Posted by: klaftern at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (RuIsu)

679 Shootout at the Golden Corral

Posted by: Miss Issippi at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (LIhNq)

680 Rawthighs

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (oVJmc)

681 Bonanza! Tales from Ponderosa

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (A5zUN)

682 The Man who Ate Liberty Valance

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (UWqZJ)

683 652 286 All laughs aside, this is tyranny...right?

I can't believe more Texans aren't getting riled up.
Posted by: Seems Legit at May 06, 2020 03:38 PM (jUVms)

I am rather pissed off about it, but I also know and understand the way TX is structured. Ultimately, this will be up to the citizens of Ector County (county seat: Odessa). If they want to restore my faith in the system, they will toss that Sheriff out on his ear come November, and see to it that he doesn't get anywhere near law enforcement on any level again.
Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 04:05 PM (zqhdn)

That Texas is geographically big is an understatement and it does effect how you can get the whole state synchronized. Odessa is 500 miles away from Houston.

Posted by: Kilroy wasn't here at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (cJswI)

684 10,000 Calories a Day

Posted by: Count de Monet at May 06, 2020 04:10 PM (q1Pj5)

685 310# to Yuma

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 04:10 PM (oVJmc)

686 Rocky Road Warrior.

Posted by: ShainS, COVID-1984 survivor at May 06, 2020 04:10 PM (6pvkK)

687 514 Did you guys see the Fat Fascist Sheriff's response to the uproar?

It was basically:

1. I'm pro 2nd amendment
2. This isn't a 2nd amendment issue
3. Those people I pointed guns at were from out of town
4. Hey, don't blame me, I just enforce the law
5. If you want to protest somebody, protest the Governor, he made me do it
Posted by: bonhomme at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (UW2ZS)

1. So?
2. So?
3. So?
4. Nuremberg
5. Nuremberg

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 04:10 PM (zqhdn)

688 Shootout at the Golden Corral
Posted by: Miss Issippi at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (LIhNq)

hahahahahah

Posted by: Somewhere on Ventura Highway at May 06, 2020 04:10 PM (M+Lyo)

689 When I see those guys in those vests that don't cover half their torso, I hear Tommy Callahan, Jr. singing "fat man in a little coat."

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 06, 2020 04:10 PM (H5knJ)

690 676 You guys are killing me! I'm still at work and my boss is still here. Trying SOOO hard not to laugh.
Posted by: Jordan61 at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (Ez6QX)


Hey, he's not supposed to get within 6 feet of you!

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:10 PM (s2VJv)

691 682 The Man who Ate Liberty Valance
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (UWqZJ)

*golfclap*

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:10 PM (A5zUN)

692 One Adam 12000

Posted by: Kilroy wasn't here at May 06, 2020 04:11 PM (cJswI)

693 Hill Street Moobs

Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 04:11 PM (iTXRQ)

694 Joint Break

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 04:11 PM (oVJmc)

695 *Charge (not Call)

Posted by: stumck at May 06, 2020 04:11 PM (w9Wax)

696


America's Most Digested

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:11 PM (s2VJv)

697 ProMootheus

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:11 PM (A5zUN)

698 The armored assaults will continue until morale improves.

Posted by: Support Your Local Sheriff at May 06, 2020 04:11 PM (Y7v+0)

699

Kick the door and eat the room!

Posted by: Pendulating Richard at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (d6DSt)

700 693 Hill Street Moobs
Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 04:11 PM (iTXRQ)

hahahaha
unexpected

Posted by: m at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (O3A5V)

701 Rawthighs

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (oVJmc)

that is harsh.

btw, I am still pro cop in general but that vehicle is a joke. what were they up against, a bar?

Posted by: Quint at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (hHxp2)

702 Crockett and Tubby


(Yeah, Hot Fuzz)

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (oVJmc)

703 The Searchers 2: The Quest for the Buffet

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (UWqZJ)

704 While we're all laughing at Fat Boy Slim, Jackass Murphy extended house arrest to Jun 15th.

Posted by: BluesFish at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (WQZ1O)

705 687 514 Did you guys see the Fat Fascist Sheriff's response to the uproar?

It was basically:

1. I'm pro 2nd amendment
2. This isn't a 2nd amendment issue
3. Those people I pointed guns at were from out of town
4. Hey, don't blame me, I just enforce the law
5. If you want to protest somebody, protest the Governor, he made me do it
Posted by: bonhomme at May 06, 2020 03:53 PM (UW2ZS)

1. So?
2. So?
3. So?
4. Nuremberg
5. Nuremberg



Nuremberg Laws or the Nuremberg Trials? There was a difference.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (s2VJv)

706 693
Hill Street Moobs

Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 04:11 PM (iTXRQ)

It was right there this whole time. Bravo.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (KnJdm)

707 I am stunned they don't have to pass any sort of annual physical.

Posted by: m at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (O3A5V)

708 Braised New World

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (A5zUN)

709 To Live And Eat Pie In LA

Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (iTXRQ)

710 Those guys were gay until they heard of eating chicks out. Needless to say they were very disappointed to find out what it was.

Posted by: thathalfrican - sucker free on my phone at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (EGH/q)

711 I can't find anything funny here. She's still in jail, last I knew, and the Branch Covidians are busy trying to figure out a way to extend the lockdown permanently.

I notice that not one of the selfish sonsabitches clamoring for more shutdown is actually suffering any of the economic consequences of this insanity.

Posted by: creeper at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (XxJt1)

712 Wyatt phat is ok. It's attitude man

Posted by: willow at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (qsljc)

713 Ok, the treadmill GoFundMe is fucking hilarious.

Posted by: Gem at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (kIHih)

714 702 Crockett and Tubby


(Yeah, Hot Fuzz)
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (oVJmc)

=========

Hot Fuzz references are signs of high culture and rearing. You should be proud.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (UWqZJ)

715 In my limited experience, most cops in west Texas look pretty much like that and whatever vehicle you happen to be driving also happens to match the description of one that they've been told to be on the lookout for.

Posted by: Bob the Bilderberg at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (qc+VF)

716 The Filling

Posted by: andycanuck at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (TQ/zJ)

717 Lethal Waistline

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (1ISKN)

718 Hill Street Brule

Posted by: GnuBreed at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (Z4rgH)

719
Can someone photoshop the tank into the Oscar Meyer Hot Dog mobile?

Posted by: Soothsayer at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (dGzLr)

720 Adipose 12

Posted by: weew at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (gk7if)

721 >>> 693 Hill Street Moobs
Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 04:11 PM (iTXRQ)

Was waiting for a take on this one. Nice.

Posted by: Turn Two at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (+AVpa)

722 >>It was right there this whole time.


I was staring right at it and didn't even see it.

Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (bPBNG)

723 "This is the city, Odessa, Texas ... I work here ... I'm a fattie. My name is Fattie, Joe Fattie."

Posted by: Huck Follywood, hunker in the bunker at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (NVYyb)

724 All I see is two obese oath-breakers. An MRAP and AR-15's for a bar that dared serve drinks. Anyone who still thinks LE will be on our side in a Constitutional crisis needs to have their head examined.

Posted by: Eisenhorn at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (F6tBH)

725 I think we're done here.

Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (bPBNG)

726 GateauBusters

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (A5zUN)

727 I'd worry that they'd have a heart attack if someone actually said no

Posted by: willow at May 06, 2020 04:14 PM (qsljc)

728 The Donut Whisperer

Posted by: Diesel Jones at May 06, 2020 04:14 PM (0CeRG)

729 Reservoir Hogs

Posted by: Ghost of Lee Atwater at May 06, 2020 04:14 PM (mdRoh)

730 Dang it, way late to an awesome thread.

Posted by: Pug Mahon at May 06, 2020 04:14 PM (x8Wzq)

731 Branch Covidians are busy trying to figure out a way to extend the lockdown permanently.

Posted by: creeper at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (XxJt1)


LOL

Posted by: Miss Issippi at May 06, 2020 04:14 PM (LIhNq)

732

The Malted Falcon

Posted by: Pendulating Richard at May 06, 2020 04:14 PM (d6DSt)

733 717
Lethal Waistline

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (1ISKN)

12 Angry Hems

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 04:14 PM (KnJdm)

734 thank you
these threads are fun
need a laugh today

Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 04:14 PM (iTXRQ)

735 Garret I'm not!

Posted by: willow at May 06, 2020 04:14 PM (qsljc)

736 Peter Gunnt

Posted by: A dude in MI at May 06, 2020 04:14 PM (/6GbT)

737 722 >>It was right there this whole time.


I was staring right at it and didn't even see it.
Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (bPBNG)

If it was a snake, it would have bit us.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:14 PM (A5zUN)

738 To Live And Die In A Pie

Posted by: GnuBreed at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (Z4rgH)

739

Gutbusters

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (s2VJv)

740 Those Texas sheriff's deputies are so fat their fucking bullet proof vests don't fit properly! They need to shop at Pedro's big and fat bullet proof vest emporium.

Posted by: Archer at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (gmo/4)

741 Hogger, Texas Ranger

Posted by: Kilroy wasn't here at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (cJswI)

742 Is the sheriff an elected position in this county. If so I can't see how he gets to keep his job after the next election.

Posted by: USNtakim profoundly deplorable. at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (0OmEj)

743 NOOOOOOOOD

Posted by: browndog at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (gD6Ka)

744 Nood Tank Abrams.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (A5zUN)

745 Bonanza

Posted by: WitchDoktor, turns out lots of people give a damn! at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (2BgZB)

746 Willow's here?

Now it's Official.

Posted by: garrett at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (bPBNG)

747 Press Secretary Kayleigh McEnany holds UP a briefing.

15 minutes late at this moment

Posted by: m at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (O3A5V)

748

Mission: Indigestible

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (s2VJv)

749 Clever horde. LOL

Posted by: Gem at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (kIHih)

750 NOOOOOOOOD
Posted by: browndog at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (gD6Ka)

Gd forbid

Posted by: willow at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (qsljc)

751 The Untouchables Toes.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (1ISKN)

752 3:10 to Donuts

Posted by: Miss Issippi at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (LIhNq)

753 Beverly Hills Slop

Posted by: thathalfrican - sucker free on my phone at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (EGH/q)

754 1984 lbs

Posted by: stumck at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (w9Wax)

755 Speaking of hogs...

Nood

Posted by: Diesel Jones at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (0CeRG)

756 Fat boys, fat boys, whatcha gonna do when they come for you ? On this episode of CARBS.

Posted by: RJD at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (ucNdt)

757 744
Nood Tank Abrams.



Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (A5zUN)

Fitting.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (KnJdm)

758 Damnit

Posted by: willow at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (qsljc)

759 Nuremberg Laws or the Nuremberg Trials? There was a difference.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:12 PM (s2VJv)

The Trials, at which the defense of "Hey! I was just following orders!" was demolished for all time.

As far as I'm concerned, if members of the Armed Forces can't claim the same, the cops (wannabees, as they LOVE to call non-cops "civilians" even though cops are not subject to the UCMJ) sure as all hell can't.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (zqhdn)

760 Baking Bad.

Posted by: ShainS, COVID-1984 survivor at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (6pvkK)

761 So, does the judge release her?

I'm betting he doubles down.

Posted by: Ben Had at May 06, 2020 04:16 PM (R6g1s)

762 Ken Paxton is supposed to phone in to Larry O'Connors radio show at 5 pm.

WMAL 105.9 fm.

Posted by: OldDominionMom at May 06, 2020 04:17 PM (dH/BH)

763 Tombstone: Pizza

Posted by: thathalfrican - sucker free on my phone at May 06, 2020 04:17 PM (EGH/q)

764 Mission: Indigestible





Posted by: J.J. Sefton at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (s2VJv)

America's Fattest.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at May 06, 2020 04:17 PM (KnJdm)

765 Hot Fuzz references are signs of high culture and rearing. You should be proud.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, back to random thoughts at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM


But not the highest, right?

Posted by: Pink Flamingos at May 06, 2020 04:17 PM (DMUuz)

766 The Guns Of Provolone

Posted by: DB- just DB. at May 06, 2020 04:17 PM (iTXRQ)

767 740 Those Texas sheriff's deputies are so fat their fucking bullet proof vests don't fit properly! They need to shop at Pedro's big and fat bullet proof vest emporium.
Posted by: Archer at May 06, 2020 04:15 PM (gmo/4)

The gut IS the bullet proof vest. No way any bullet gets further than two inches deep in all that blubber.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 04:17 PM (zqhdn)

768 Hambo

Posted by: Kilroy wasn't here at May 06, 2020 04:18 PM (cJswI)

769 The sweat team..

Posted by: Catman at May 06, 2020 04:18 PM (4HMlb)

770 Total EatAll

Posted by: thathalfrican - sucker free on my phone at May 06, 2020 04:18 PM (EGH/q)

771 The Governor of Tex-Ass is out of control and must be punished by the FBI. We call on President Obama to do something about this loser Governor from Texas !!!!!

Posted by: Mary Clogginstein from Brattleboro, VT at May 06, 2020 04:18 PM (qM84C)

772 Anti-Running Man

Posted by: thathalfrican - sucker free on my phone at May 06, 2020 04:18 PM (EGH/q)

773 Last !

Posted by: Kilroy wasn't here at May 06, 2020 04:19 PM (cJswI)

774 T2: Buffet Day

Posted by: thathalfrican - sucker free on my phone at May 06, 2020 04:19 PM (EGH/q)

775 Why is that judge wearing a mask on a Zoom call? The virus doesn't transmit over the Internet.

Posted by: Ian S. at May 06, 2020 04:20 PM (ZGrMX)

776 Ok I guess I'll goto the other thread.....

Posted by: thathalfrican - sucker free on my phone at May 06, 2020 04:20 PM (EGH/q)

777 That Texas is geographically big is an understatement and it does effect how you can get the whole state synchronized. Odessa is 500 miles away from Houston.
Posted by: Kilroy wasn't here at May 06, 2020 04:09 PM (cJswI)

And Texas has a very decentralized government, and it has 254 counties. You have Harris County with, what, 2.5 million people? And not far from Odessa - which as you point out is way aways from Houston - is Loving County, with all of MAYBE 100 people, most of which are in the county seat of Mentone.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 04:21 PM (zqhdn)

778 <blockquote>429 There has to be a loophole for the governor not to have to ask the
judge.</blockquote>
Of course there is. He can write her a pardon right now. If he's only posturing then he intends only to posture.

Posted by: jdgalt at May 06, 2020 04:22 PM (3SFo/)

779 Of course there is. He can write her a pardon right now. If he's only posturing then he intends only to posture.
Posted by: jdgalt at May 06, 2020 04:22 PM (3SFo/)

No he cannot. As has been pointed out over and over again here. The governor of TX cannot pardon willy nilly.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 04:23 PM (zqhdn)

780 The EEE Team

Posted by: Sharon(willow's apprentice) at May 06, 2020 04:24 PM (QzF6i)

781 724 All I see is two obese oath-breakers. An MRAP and AR-15's for a bar that dared serve drinks. Anyone who still thinks LE will be on our side in a Constitutional crisis needs to have their head examined.
Posted by: Eisenhorn at May 06, 2020 04:13 PM (F6tBH)

They will be on the side of who gives them their pension.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 06, 2020 04:25 PM (zqhdn)

782 578
557 "Meal Team Six" sounds like it could work as a Netflix series. A
combination of Reno 911, Hell's Kitchen and the Dukes of Hazard.

Posted by: Mr. Barky at May 06, 2020 03:57 PM (hKi6n)



Until they had Amy Schumer as Daisy.



Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 06, 2020 03:59 PM (A5zUN)

And they would, wouldn't they.
Schumer. Daisy Dukes. Shit.

Posted by: Mr. Barky at May 06, 2020 04:28 PM (hKi6n)

783 Greetings:

The Salon Owner was way too restrained. I would have played the Rosa Parks card on the "Here comes the"Judge.

Posted by: 11B40 at May 06, 2020 04:29 PM (evgyj)

784 Texas has a Judicial Conduct Commission. Perhaps they'd enjoy reading a few complaints and if the Commission starts an investigation, something for the judge to do too.

Posted by: Mr. Barky at May 06, 2020 04:31 PM (hKi6n)

785 "Stop! In the name of the law!...please...stop! I can't continue this foot pursuit! ...don't make me run another 6 feet! This bullet proof vest protects only the space between my mitties so please shoot right there is you're going to shoot at me...never mind, I got another heart attack coming on! Don't do whatever you did again! Dispatch, officer down, officer down, requesting chili dog box meal from Weinerschnitzel!"

Posted by: NeverNeverTrumper at May 06, 2020 04:41 PM (0jZvB)

786 778
<blockquote>429 There has to be a loophole for the governor not to have to ask the

judge.</blockquote>
Of course there is. He can write her a pardon right now. If he's only posturing then he intends only to posture.


you're new here, aren't you?

Posted by: Anachronda at May 06, 2020 05:09 PM (kf5Ci)

787 #48, Zombie:

That link has been 404'ed. Stuffed down the Memory Hole.
Oh, and that "judge"? An arrogant Communist bastard. Kissing cousin of the show trials "judges" in the USSR and National Socialist Germany.

Humiliate the victim, make her criticize and Denounce herself (classic Soviet samokritika), then crawl away, broken, promising never to sin against the Party again...
Samokritika Rituals in the Stalinist Central Committee:
https://www.jstor.org/stable/2679705?seq=1

Posted by: Beverly at May 06, 2020 05:32 PM (0KiA5)

788 Vote to have this Globalists Judge removed from the bench and their ruling against the Hairstylists overturned lets put the judge in jail instead

Posted by: Tamaa the Drongo Bird at May 06, 2020 05:34 PM (FLiOE)

789 Talk's cheap, Governor... Call out the Rangers and have them release her.

Posted by: Jim Lewis at May 06, 2020 06:49 PM (12Psz)

790 way back, Clinton (when pres) wanted this judge (Moye) to be NorthTexas federal bench (lifetime), nominated him. but then, (after poking into who he really was) quietly dropped his nomination. That tells me EVERYTHING.

Posted by: politic uber alles at May 06, 2020 07:42 PM (0hOKG)

791 The socialist totalitarian demorats are hot to turn this flu crisis into a totalitarian dictatorship, except President Trump and the Constitution keeps getting in their way. They are lock-stepping demanding the crisis gives them powers that they can't get from the Constitution and Trump won't let them get away with either. Hitlery and Biden insist this is a crisis the, -rats must not waste.

Posted by: ron n. at May 06, 2020 09:54 PM (om5HK)

792 Like the Covington situation, it's wise to find out more about the story before deciding that this is the Mayberry NKVD. I looked at the local stories on this and while it remains to be seen if the thing was reasonable, there WERE people on site, at a bar with some of the best kinds of rifles. Wearing appropriate gear for having fun with those rifles.

It MAY be that none of them were drinking. It MAY be that there is no common knowledge of aggressive characters who get hotheaded and maybe have some history around there.

I noticed the twitters didn't show the DPS tactical guys out there that appeared on the local channel. Aside from being a lot fitter and not looking very comical does anyone wonder if they will saddle up for just any old waste of time shitshow?

That Sherriff, he is a local elected lawman. What are the chances I wonder that he has a finger on the pulse of people in that county and maybe knows that bar and some of its patrons? This ain't exactly Marin county. I can't help but sense like something is missing in the jackboot narrative.

I like to embarrass gun grabbers with their lack of knowledge about guns. Can we please quit calling armored vehicles tanks? It undermines my fun. Whats next...."Tank picks up deposit at Walmart!"

The treadmill Go Fund Me is top shelf though. That's the spirit!

Posted by: TJ at May 07, 2020 12:10 AM (6lQ+g)

793 It would be nice if both Paxton and Abbott took some more decisive action. Paxton could intervene in the case, for example. Or Abbott could commute her sentence or pardon her.

Posted by: Nikola's Notion at May 07, 2020 07:34 AM (hrHLc)

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