California declares state of emergency over massive population growth of illegal aliens. (The jokes just write themselves here)

Have at it.

Posted by: krakatoa at 12:42 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria - their very name indicates they are nutritious.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:44 PM (vkS2Z)

2 Rats!!!

Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (xqfqx)

3 Weren't these suspected in the infamous Carter Rabbit Attack?

Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (AM1GF)

4 California could just change it's name to "State of Emergency."

Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (O7MnT)

5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

6 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria

Soylent Brown?

Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (wW03z)

7 I just noticed that when I post I seem to go back in time by about 8 minutes. The incredible powers of Pixy!

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (vkS2Z)

8 They could market these inveders under the product name Nutria System... with more electrolytes.

Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (zSVEm)

9 California politicians have finally met some illegal aliens they don't want to feed and subsidize with taxpayer dollars?

Will wonders never cease!

On the plus side, giant rats will fit in well with the rest of the vermin currently infesting CA.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (fqUgw)

10 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

-----------------

Cheetos

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (+F0Wk)

11 Wait, I've been told illegal immigration is a net plus to our economy.

Posted by: WisRich at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (G0vdT)

12 Two things are certain. First, no one will propose a wall to deal with this. Second, whatever they do proposed will be utterly useless and not solve the problem at all.

Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (XOEc2)

13 Nutria-phobic racism!!!!

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (hMwEB)

14 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
________________

He forgot to floss.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (fqUgw)

15 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

To mask the Cheetos stains.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (vkS2Z)

16 Looks like Lisa Page.

Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (xqfqx)

17 California could just change it's name to "State of Emergency."
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (O7MnT)

I think we're past that. State of Morbidity would be more like it.

Posted by: Dan Smoot's Apprentice at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (H8QX8)

18 they're just un-documented rodents.

Posted by: USMC8541 at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (NmR1a)

19 The article describes these animals as "a kind of giant river rat."

"Hell, we've had them things in Loozyana for centuries, 'n' nobody ever' died."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (9xaT+)

20 Sort of looks like Henry Waxman.

Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (zSVEm)

21 Cheetos

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (+F0Wk)

Finest minds thinking alike.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (vkS2Z)

22 1 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria - their very name indicates they are nutritious.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:44 PM (vkS2Z)

Supposedly they taste like rabbit.

Posted by: Surfperch at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (J7NdS)

23 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

*

California health care at its finest.

Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (xqfqx)

24 "Nutria are about two and a half feet long with a twelve inch tail. Their whiskers are white and their hind feet webbed."

------

Aaaaahhhh!!!!
Rodents of Unusual Size
Kill it with fire!!!

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (hMwEB)

25 I can't stand its accusing stare. I cried.

Posted by: Morrissey at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (loZXu)

26 California : The Sound of 30 Million Farts all at once.

Posted by: Hikaru at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (9TK8E)

27 State of decomposition

Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (XOEc2)

28 California could just change it's name to "State of Emergency."
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo

State of Paranoia

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (2ifxQ)

29 State of chaos.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (vkS2Z)

30 At least they don't vote.

Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

31 Would it be wrong if someone placed Nutria families in certain CA neighborhoods?

Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (r9UYA)

32 >>Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

California requires Carrots in the Chili.

Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (o7yn2)

33 3 Weren't these suspected in the infamous Carter Rabbit Attack?
Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (AM1GF)

That rabbit's dynamite!

Posted by: Arthur, King of The Britons at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (7HtZB)

34 I am introducing emergency legislation to ensure that these nutria qualify for in-state tuition rates.

Posted by: CA State Legislator at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (ppBhU)

35 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

Like other rodents, they do not have enamel on their teeth and their teeth continually grow through their entire life span.

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (BF6Fv)

36 It's CA. I could give a rats ass.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (EDSlc)

37 Nutrias at the Gates.. would make a fine movie..

Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (zSVEm)

38 Aaaaahhhh!!!!
Rodents of Unusual Size
Kill it with fire!!!
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (hMwEB)

---------

I don't think they really exist

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (+F0Wk)

39 30 At least they don't vote.
_______________

Oh no? Hahaha. We love your optimism and naivete'

Posted by: CA Dim Party at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (fqUgw)

40 30 At least they don't vote.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

Not yet.

Posted by: Random Hawaiian Judge #7 at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (7HtZB)

41 Nutrias are natural DemocRATS

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (hMwEB)

42 I seem to recall a flap about 30 years ago when a suburban parish's deputies were entertaining themselves, and cleaning up the neighborhood, by shooting the nutria running around the open drainage canals. (Yes, Virginia, Noo Awlins' suburbs have open drainage canals all over. There are occasional fences, but it's still possible on a dark rainy night to drive into the canal and drown.)

But of course, CA's officials won't do that.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (9xaT+)

43 Don't those things cause cancer?

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (RD7QR)

44
No Nutria is Illegal!

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (r+sAi)

45 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius

Gnawing trees/bark/tannins.
They gnaw to keep their teeth filed down.
Teeth are always growing.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (2ifxQ)

46 That rabbit's dynamite!

Posted by: Arthur, King of The Britons at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

Look at all the bones!

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (EDSlc)

47 >> at least they don't vote

Why not? It's very difficult for them to get IDs.

Posted by: Dems at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (XOEc2)

48 Drop dry ice down their holes!

Posted by: Kaiser Wilhelm at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (+y/Ru)

49 30 At least they don't vote.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

ANIMALS ARE PEOPLE TOO!!!!! THEY DESERVE A RIGHT TO VOTE!!!!!

Posted by: PETA at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (J7NdS)

50 I thought nutria was one of those super foods vegans like to eat.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (nBr1j)

51 Just to follow up on post of person shot in Walmart. It's not as simple as what was posted. You can google John Crawford III to get the full story.

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (s9DTK)

52 They could always divert the Oroville Dam repair funds to help get rid of the rats.

Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (r9UYA)

53 I should think CA would want to arm it's citizens so that they can eradicate these evil ROUS's. Yeah. Lots of guns. That's the ticket.

Or, they could just open a Planned Nutria Parenthood in the neighborhood. That seems to be fairly efficient at killing off undesirables.

Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (7UW64)

54 At least they don't vote.

Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)
**
I tried for years to get the little rats on the voter roles! Stupid bastards couldn't sign their names!

Posted by: Barbara Boxer at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (xqfqx)

55 Just wait... someone in Coleforrnia will start self identifying as a nutria...

Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (zSVEm)

56 Mmmmmm. Bet that would be tasty with a tarantula on top.

Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (o2MD2)

57 How big are they?

Posted by: Richard Gere at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (djCea)

58 I don't think they really exist

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (+F0Wk)

That's what the Fire Swamp WANTS you to think.

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (hMwEB)

59 The article describes these animals as "a kind of giant river rat."

"Hell, we've had them things in Loozyana for centuries, 'n' nobody ever' died."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius

State used to pay $5 a tail.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (2ifxQ)

60 Have they tried Acme products?

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (+y/Ru)

61 Nutria is lLatin for 'Shadow Varmint'.

Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (gDv68)

62 IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE THEY REFUSE TO DEPLOY THEIR NATIONAL GUARD TO THE BORDER.

Posted by: BEN ROETHLISBERGER at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (W+vEI)

63 Nutrias at the Gates.. would make a fine movie..

Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

Nutrinado!!!!

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (EDSlc)

64 #NutriaLivesMatter

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (MDlMP)

65 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

66 35 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

Like other rodents, they do not have enamel on their teeth and their teeth continually grow through their entire life span.
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018
*
*
So when they grow some more, they'll come out a different color? How about blue?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (9xaT+)

67
Full of nutrients and beta kerosenes!

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (VM6ev)

68 And here I thought that it would be an article on how the invasive species Illegalus Mexicanus was impacting the local San Francisco fauna Homo Sexualus.

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (9BLnV)

69 New Orleans has teams shoot them at night ... sounds fun.

The whole invasive species thing really is a lesson in "diversity". Many of the invaders (plants mostly) that take over and destroy lands were deliberately introduced for some good purpose ... then they wipe out everything.

Posted by: illiniwek at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (bT8Z4)

70 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (hMwEB)

71 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
______________

We recommended they use Ora-jet toothbrushes, but the handles kept slipping through their claws.

Posted by: American Dental Assoc. at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (fqUgw)

72 House the nutria with the illegals? House the illegals with the nutria? Do both?

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (RD7QR)

73 65 Looks like beaver to me.
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

"Be like a beaver, and split!"

- - The California Nutria Marketing Board

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (VM6ev)

74 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria

Soylent Brown?

Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM

Sorry, I read that as feed the homeless To the nutria.

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (EDSlc)

75 They don't sit still on the cast couch either.

Rat Bastards.

Posted by: Harvey Weinstein at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (xqfqx)

76
Supposedly our forebears nearly wiped out the beaver and the buffalo, but we can't have a Nutria Fur Coat industry?

Come on America, we know how to kill these things.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (r+sAi)

77 30 At least they don't vote.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

Are you kidding?

The nutria and the delta smelt are two core Democrat constituencies.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (MDlMP)

78 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Not even close

You can trust me. I'm a professional.

Posted by: Peter North at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (fiGNd)

79 65 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Good heavens, man, how long has it been?

Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (7UW64)

80 "16 Looks like Lisa Page.

Posted by: dananjcon"

Considering she looks like Joey Ramone's homely sister, she's got to bring something to the table to have a husband and bf simultaneously. However, I won't speculate what that is at this family friendly site. But tennis ball and garden hose come to mind.

Posted by: Benji Carver at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (OD2ni)

81 They're a type of weasel.

Posted by: Larsen E. Whipsnade at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (bML9A)

82 California needs to invest in green powered leaf blowers.

Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (2LelM)

83 CNN is super-excited because "Cohen is about to flip."

Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (O7MnT)

84 Set up nutria tent-cities and shelters and hand out free food! Let them in the libraries---and Starbucks!--- to watch porn!
If you're super-nice to them, they won't chew your bridge down!

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (0jtPF)

85 From the interwebz: Nutria numbers in Louisiana are now estimated at 20 million. The state pays a bounty of $4 for every nutria tail and typically gets about 300,000 tails a year.

Opportunity for enterprising youngsters.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (vkS2Z)

86 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale

Dreamers. Even Speedy Gonzalez has dreams you privileged Caucasian!

Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (EDSlc)

87 Trump hates Nutrias and wants to deport them. Save the Nutrias! Impnutria foddy-fi!

Posted by: mindful webworker says pftth at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (ATv6t)

88 Mebbe the California shitheads can give the Nutria free condoms so they will start to deplete, or maybe taxpayer paid abortions.

Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (o2MD2)

89 32 >>Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

California requires Carrots in the Chili.

Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

mic drop.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (0tfLf)

90 71 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
______________

We recommended they use Ora-jet toothbrushes, but the handles kept slipping through their claws.
Posted by: American Dental Assoc. at April 19, 2018
*
*
My favorite comment yet.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (9xaT+)

91 In Alabama, the authorities imported alligators to cope with the beaver population.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (yQpMk)

92 79 65 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Good heavens, man, how long has it been?
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (7UW64)

The power of a missing article. (a)

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (nBr1j)

93 OH! EM! JEE! Teh Kyoot!!! It burns!

You know why CA has a housing crisis? I11egals. Well, without them, there'd be a lot less competition for housing, and no, they don't all live 2 dozen to a 1 BR.

Posted by: SFgoth at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (dZ756)

94 "It's a triple threat. It's public safety, it's the economy, it's the environment. If nutria get established in California, there's almost no hope of removing them. That's why we are acting so quickly."

The lack of self-awareness....

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (W+vEI)

95 30 At least they don't vote.

Yet... We'll see about that

Posted by: T. Liu at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (hdFyL)

96 The whole invasive species thing really is a lesson in "diversity". Many of the invaders (plants mostly) that take over and destroy lands were deliberately introduced for some good purpose ... then they wipe out everything.
Posted by: illiniwek

Kudzu

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (2ifxQ)

97 Governor Jerry Brown announced he will deploy "up to 400 National Guard Troops" to do nothing. The crime rate in California is high enough, and the Federal Government will not be paying for Governor Brown's charade. We need border security and action, not words!

@RealDonaldTrump 1h

Not to mention yuge face eating rodents.

Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (r9UYA)

98 79
65 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Good heavens, man, how long has it been?

Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (7UW64)

For some of us too long.

Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (gjGvH)

99 Doing the jobs that muskrats won't do!

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (w1zJX)

100 67
Full of nutrients and beta kerosenes!
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (VM6ev)

When you shoot them they make a sound like a dog...woof!!!

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (BF6Fv)

101 Aaaaahhhh!!!!

Rodents of Unusual Size

Kill it with fire!!!

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM

I don't believe they exist.

Posted by: The Dread Pirate Westley at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (p+Wdc)

102
Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

They're protesting Trump's tough stand on illegal immigration. They'd wear pussy hats but they haven' t figured out how to put them on their heads yet.

Posted by: Solyndra at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (lKyWE)

103 34 I am introducing emergency legislation to ensure that these nutria qualify for in-state tuition rates.
Posted by: CA State Legislator at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (ppBhU)

In-state? Previous waves of illegal aliens get FREE tuition.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (MDlMP)

104 57 How big are they?
Posted by: Richard Gere at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (djCea)

Small enough for you, no worries.

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (RD7QR)

105 Nutria? Isn't that something you spread on toast?

Posted by: SFgoth at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (dZ756)

106 Sigh. More wetbacks.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (MDlMP)

107 Considering she looks like Joey Ramone's homely sister, she's got to bring something to the table to have a husband and bf simultaneously. However, I won't speculate what that is at this family friendly site. But tennis ball and garden hose come to mind.
========

All deliveries in the rear.

Posted by: Lisa P. at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (vg8iE)

108 I remember a mean chat sometimes used when I was in elementary school "fat, fat water rat."

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (nBr1j)

109 In Alabama, the authorities imported alligators to cope with the beaver population.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (yQpMk)

If only they'd just quit slaughtering them every fall ...

Posted by: Peter North at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (fiGNd)

110 70 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (hMwEB)

They were "introduced" into California in the 1890's!

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (vkS2Z)

111 Like other rodents, they do not have enamel on their teeth and their teeth continually grow through their entire life span.
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

But we'll put fluoride in the water, because.

Posted by: California State Bureau of Nutria Dental Care at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (ctuyM)

112 #NutriaToo

Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (xqfqx)

113 Kudzu
Posted by: rickb223
------------

The introduction of Kudzu was a government project.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (5OO3x)

114 I told you about this shit, and everybody laughed at me!

Posted by: Jimmy Carter at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (MDlMP)

115 Speaking of invasive rats:

Cuomo on the history of Italian immigrants facing discrimination: "You want to deport immigrants start with me, because I'm an undocumented person."

Dude, you've convinced me. Get on the boat!

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (+y/Ru)

116 Perchance were you a student at Sunny Terrace? I remember that one as well.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (vkS2Z)

117 "It's a triple threat. It's public safety, it's the economy, it's the environment. If nutria get established in California, there's almost no hope of removing them. That's why we are acting so quickly."

Triple threat identified! Unlike what's coming across our Southern border that endangers public safety, economy, and the environment.

What until these big rats get driver's licenses!

Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (oiNtH)

118 $5 for tail
Looks like beaver

Krakatoa is right, the jokes write themselves.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (0tfLf)

119 Is there a hunting season for Nutria in Kalifornia?

Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (gjGvH)

120 As I recall, nutria don't really look much like rats. They're a little cuter -- more like groundhogs.

"Not bad for a quadruped."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (9xaT+)

121 Off Porn Legend sock !!!

Posted by: ScoggDog at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (fiGNd)

122 Nutria are natural Republicans. We should welcome them

Posted by: Ripley at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (MxEKc)

123 I would pay to see Jerry Brown ass porked by a nutria.

Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (o2MD2)

124 76
Supposedly our forebears nearly wiped out the beaver and the buffalo, but we can't have a Nutria Fur Coat industry?

Come on America, we know how to kill these things.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (r+sAi)
-------------------------------
Nutria fur is very soft and nice.
Honestly, if it weren't for the PETA crowd, the problem really would take care of itself.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (0jtPF)

125 A team of biologists has been trained to trap the nutria. And it can difficult to tell the difference between nutria and non-threatening animals like beavers, otters and muskrats

"It's tricky to identify them. We have wildlife biologists, PhDs out there trying to understand and identify them. It's been challenging," said Tira.

PhDs, man. P ... h ... Ds!!

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (7ieWW)

126 The introduction of Kudzu was a government project.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (5OO3x)

We're from the government, and we're here to help.

Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (7UW64)

127 They are amphibious whistle pigs.

Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (2LelM)

128 Also from interwebz: The critters were first introduced from South America to this country in 1899 in California.

California has a lot to answer for.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (vkS2Z)

129 Upskirt shot of Lena Dunham?

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (nBr1j)

130
Vox
@voxdotcom
The Parkland students are leading a master class in how to deal with bullies.

Well, you can't say they don't need it.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (+y/Ru)

131 From the article:

"Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (oMtOd)

132 Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (+y/Ru)

Why do politicians make these stupid statements?. You were born here, Cuomo. You father was born here. I expect the relatives you had from Italy came here legally through Ellis Island.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (tpDAe)

133 There was an article somewhere about the problem with these critters in Louisiana. Apparently they were brought in decades ago as a source for furs, which would provide income to them there deplorable folks who live in the swamp. The fur industry has collapsed, thanks to progs, and the Nutria are a-swarmin'. They apparently taste OK, and there's some effort to make them part of N'Orleans cookin', according to this article - which I can't find now. But trust me....

Posted by: George V at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (LUHWu)

134 The whole invasive species thing really is a lesson in "diversity". Many of the invaders (plants mostly) that take over and destroy lands were deliberately introduced for some good purpose ... then they wipe out everything.
_____________________

Raaaaaaaaaacist h8ter!!!

Everybody knows that diversity is an unquestioned, and unquestionable, good!

And if you don't agree, we will keeeeeeeeeel you!

Posted by: CAIR at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (fqUgw)

135 #LetThemVote

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (oVJmc)

136
"Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.

Their teeth are fast as lightning!

ICE spokesfolks, clutching their sides from laughter, could not summon a comment.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (pNxlR)

137 From the interwebz: Nutria numbers in Louisiana are now estimated at 20 million. The state pays a bounty of $4 for every nutria tail and typically gets about 300,000 tails a year.

Opportunity for enterprising youngsters.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (vkS2Z)

I read there was a similar program for rats in Vietnam a while back. It got cancelled when officials noticed tailless rats running around the city. The people were taking the tails, but leaving the rats to breed so the gravy train could continue.

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (+F0Wk)

138 130
Vox
@voxdotcom
The Parkland students are leading a master class in how to deal with bullies.

Well, you can't say they don't need it.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (+y/Ru)

How mentally torture a kid and make him grab a rifle?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (VM6ev)

139
Supposedly they taste like rabbit

+++

Which in turn tastes like chicken

Posted by: Bigbys Cellphone at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (/JlMC)

140 $5. Same as in town.

Posted by: Just the Punchline at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (yQpMk)

141 "Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell

Once they drop a litter, they can go to pound town again in 48 hours.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (2ifxQ)

142 There goes the neighborhood.

Posted by: Sewer Rat at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (djCea)

143 The cool job is riding in the back of a pickup through New Orleans at 0200 shooting nutria with a scoped/silenced rifle. This is probably the only honest work the NOPD does.

Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (2LelM)

144 129
Upskirt shot of Lena Dunham?

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (nBr1j)

God, I need mind bleach for what I just imagined.

Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (gjGvH)

145 It looks like Adam Schiff is gonna take Trump's pardon pen away from him.

Posted by: Bill W at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (Z4UvQ)

146 Nutria fur is very soft and nice.
Honestly, if it weren't for the PETA crowd, the problem really would take care of itself.
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (0jtPF)
----------

Isn't that why they were brought here in the first place? I thought there were nutria farms for that very purpose.

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (oMtOd)

147 "It's a triple threat. It's public safety, it's the economy, it's the environment. If nutria get established in California, there's almost no hope of removing them."

I said the same thing about liberals from the Northeast and upper Midwest 40 years ago, and yet here we are.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (MDlMP)

148
Wait! Wait! Jerry's dealt with this sort of thing before!

Spray infested areas with Paraquat!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (pNxlR)

149 "Louisiana has also battled a much larger nutria invasion. But as to how the rodents ended up in California, nobody is quite sure."

Well, lets see...what happened in Louisiana a few years ago that caused a huge shift in population where the government relocated a bunch of people and what was left of their belongings to other states, like California.
Hmmmm....
Let me think.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (0tfLf)

150 I would like to see property taxes increased 10 percent statewide to fight this rodent scourge. No, make it 15 percent.

Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (r9UYA)

151 Around here, I mostly have to deal with moose in the yard, on the street, and in the school yard. We have one very naughty young bull that hangs around the house and causes any amount of havoc.

A couple of weeks ago the boy was down the street at a friend's house, and called to say he was going to be late because he couldn't walk home past the moose. So, DH got in the truck and drove three houses down to pick him up.

This is the same bull who stripped the apples off my sweet apple tree, drooled all over the deck, and then broke off branches because he couldn't get to the ones higher up.

If I didn't live in town, he would be happily residing on my freezer by now.

Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (7UW64)

152 "Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.
========

Peter Tira-Puffer

Posted by: bicentennialguy at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (vg8iE)

153 I declare Mexicans an invasive species. Brown needs to Fight invasion by killing his dumbass self/

Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (o2MD2)

154
I saw Invasive Species open for Three Dog Night at the Spectrum.

Posted by: Forgot My Nic at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (LOgQ4)

155

Nutriasweet

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (IqV8l)

156 Once they drop a litter, they can go to pound town again in 48 hours.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (2ifxQ)

Nutria can do that too.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (MDlMP)

157
"It's tricky to identify them. We have wildlife biologists, PhDs out there trying to understand and identify them. It's been challenging," said Tira.

Men don't need a fancy shmancy degree to tell you that chasing beaver is time consuming and expensive

Posted by: Solyndra at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (lKyWE)

158 I imagine they taste at least as good as opossum.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (yQpMk)

159
You have to give California credit - their diet is enriched in irony.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (pNxlR)

160 >>What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Sounds more like Tribbles.

Are these wicked-smaat PhDs who can't tell the difference between a Nutria and a beaver sure these aren't Tribbles?

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (W+vEI)

161 So is the problem that they might vote republican?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (h/uSM)

162 151 Around here, I mostly have to deal with moose in the yard, on the street, and in the school yard. We have one very naughty young bull that hangs around the house and causes any amount of havoc.

A couple of weeks ago the boy was down the street at a friend's house, and called to say he was going to be late because he couldn't walk home past the moose. So, DH got in the truck and drove three houses down to pick him up.

This is the same bull who stripped the apples off my sweet apple tree, drooled all over the deck, and then broke off branches because he couldn't get to the ones higher up.

If I didn't live in town, he would be happily residing on my freezer by now.
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (7UW64)

Deer poop in the yard is the worst I have to deal--well that and deer choosing to randomly jump onto the highway.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (nBr1j)

163 I read there was a similar program for rats in Vietnam a while back. It got cancelled when officials noticed tailless rats running around the city. The people were taking the tails, but leaving the rats to breed so the gravy train could continue.
-------------------
Yep. That sounds like Asia.

Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (2LelM)

164 "Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."
=======

What the fuck are they? Tribbles?

Posted by: bicentennialguy at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (vg8iE)

165 131 From the article:

"Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018
*
*
I suspect the "writer" meant something like "the nutria can get pregnant again within 48 hours after giving birth." You're right, the other way makes them sound like tribbles with legs.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (9xaT+)

166 Is there a hunting season for Nutria in Kalifornia?

What will you hunt with, a semi-auto in California?

Posted by: Leland at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (kB2km)

167 As part of the upcoming Harry and Meghan marital extravaganza, "Crown Jewels Heritage Condoms" are being made available, at the low, low price of 10 Pounds for a box of 4.

Described as being "fit for a prince", the box features a picture of the happy couple.

As the box is opened, the British and American national anthems ring out, presumably to induce standing at attention.

Posted by: Moron News YOU can use! at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (ctuyM)

168
Off swindling sock

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (lKyWE)

169 125 A team of biologists has been trained to trap the nutria. And it can difficult to tell the difference between nutria and non-threatening animals like beavers, otters and muskrats

"It's tricky to identify them. We have wildlife biologists, PhDs out there trying to understand and identify them. It's been challenging," said Tira.

PhDs, man. P ... h ... Ds!!
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (7ieWW)

So biologists can't tell the difference between beavers and otters? Really?

Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (7HtZB)

170 I have young relatives in Louisiana that have made a fair amount of money shooting nutrea.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - SJWs Destroyed My Garden Because I Grew Heritage Tomatoes at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (4EJjM)

171 I'm sure Nutria has already been served as General Tzo's chicken somewhere...

Posted by: BluesFish at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (KG+lL)

172 The solution will involve an obscene increase in taxes and painting river banks white.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (nBr1j)

173 Notice how we hear endlessly about David Hogg, but no Nikolas Cruz has gone down the memory hole?

No info of his motivation, background, manifesto, or anything else.

I would think that the most important person to listen to from that killing would be the still-alive killer and not some opportunistic bystander.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oVJmc)

174 So what they're really saying is that they can get pregnant again 48 hours after giving birth?

Sloppy writing.

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oMtOd)

175 I believe Louisiana pays a bounty on nutria.

Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (o2MD2)

176 Well honestly, between the Nutria and Henry Waxman, the Nutria is a 10.

Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oiNtH)

177 This thread reminds me - what's new on the 3-legged doe that was hanging around Jane's house?

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (hMwEB)

178 Free food source for the homeless. I don't see a problem.

Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (r9UYA)

179 There must be some way CA can tax them.

Posted by: wth at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (HgMAr)

180
Isn't that why they were brought here in the first place? I thought there were nutria farms for that very purpose.
___________________

There was a Seinfeld episode where Elaine went crazy with the Peterson's company credit card, and let George charge an expensive fur hat (Russian sable or something).

When the company accountant told her she had to account for all her spending, she replaced the hat with a cheap nutria-fur hat, but the accountant wasn't fooled and told her he could recognize a "rat hat" when he saw one.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (fqUgw)

181
... stripped the apples off my sweet apple tree, drooled all over the deck, and then broke off branches because he couldn't get to the ones higher up ...

I'll take "Drop-In Phrases for Any Mo-Mee Promotional Brochure" for $600, Alex!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (pNxlR)

182 166
Is there a hunting season for Nutria in Kalifornia?

What will you hunt with, a semi-auto in California?

Posted by: Leland at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (kB2km)

Given it's Kalifornia, maybe slingshot or rocks and sticks.

Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (gjGvH)

183 When will the nutria in the photo by the Democratic Party caucus chairman?

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (nBr1j)

184 What they need to do is use a few nutria pelts to design some clothes, then pay a coupla Kardashians to model them on Instagram, and then - BOOM! - problem solved.

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (W+vEI)

185 141 "Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell

Once they drop a litter, they can go to pound town again in 48 hours.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM

So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (0tfLf)

186 Much as I dislike Carter - what he described sounded to me like a rabbit suffering from rabies.

I would have written "rabid rabbit" but that would have started an entirely noxious chain of posts.

Posted by: An Observation at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (QGEI2)

187
"Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.

Nutria in a Starbucks - now THAT would be frightening, fear-for-your-life frightening.

Posted by: Hands at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (EzdLW)

188 >>>It's tricky to identify them.

Picture IDs are racist.

Posted by: Progglodyte at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (djCea)

189 Stop the genocide!

We need programs for the Nutria-Americans!

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (MDlMP)

190 70 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something

---

OK - get this! Back in the day, people imported these gross bastards (on purpose!) to the US to be farmed for fur.

However, it turns out that fashionable ladies didn't want to wear swamp-rat fur, and the farms were not profitable. The farmers simply released them into the wild to prosper.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (AzW6q)

191 So what they're really saying is that they can get pregnant again 48 hours after giving birth?

Sloppy writing.

Posted by: bluebell

Yeah.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (2ifxQ)

192 180
Isn't that why they were brought here in the first place? I thought there were nutria farms for that very purpose.
___________________

There was a Seinfeld episode where Elaine went crazy with the Peterson's company credit card, and let George charge an expensive fur hat (Russian sable or something).

When the company accountant told her she had to account for all her spending, she replaced the hat with a cheap nutria-fur hat, but the accountant wasn't fooled and told her he could recognize a "rat hat" when he saw one.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (fqUgw)

"And a poorly made one, even by rat-hat standards."

Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (7HtZB)

193 "It's tricky to identify them"
...

In California it is a violation of their civil rights to ask them their specific class of rodent.

Posted by: Tanner Boyle at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (2wOtx)

194
176 Well honestly, between the Nutria and Henry Waxman, the Nutria is a 10.
Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oiNtH)

Threadwinner! Shut 'er down!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (pNxlR)

195 Eucalyptus trees in CA don't help either. They burn like a flame thrower.

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (s9DTK)

196 Nutria have long skinny tails. Beavers have paddle tails, and otters are just as cute as they can be.

Where do I pick up my PHD?

Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (oiNtH)

197 145 It looks like Adam Schiff is gonna take Trump's pardon pen away from him.
Posted by: Bill W at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (Z4UvQ)
------------------------------
Is he going to sneak into the Oval Office tonight or what?!?

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (0jtPF)

198 187
"Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.

Nutria in a Starbucks - now THAT would be frightening, fear-for-your-life frightening.
Posted by: Hands at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (EzdLW)

Give me a real fucking cup of coffee or the tatted up hipster barrista gets it!

Posted by: Nutria at Starbucks at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (RD7QR)

199 6 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria

Soylent Brown?
Posted by: pep

Maybe feed the homeless to the Nutria.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (kfcYC)

200 >>So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Pssst! Want some brown snakes for free?
Will, uh, take care of your problem real good!

Posted by: Guam at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (W+vEI)

201 186 Much as I dislike Carter - what he described sounded to me like a rabbit suffering from rabies.

I would have written "rabid rabbit" but that would have started an entirely noxious chain of posts.

Posted by: An Observation at April 19, 2018
*
*
Avenge me!!!

Posted by: General Woundwort at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (9xaT+)

202 Many were admitted to the Golden State to pad Hillary's election margin.

Posted by: regular joe at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (kb0cx)

203 Announce that Nutria eat marijuana plants and the problem would be solved overnight.

Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (r9UYA)

204 I binged Nutria predators and got:

bald eagles and hawks, cottonmouth snakes, garfish, dogs, turtles and alligators.

what's a garfish?

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (hMwEB)

205 This thread reminds me - what's new on the 3-legged doe that was hanging around Jane's house?

-

There is nothing new. Stop asking questions.

Posted by: Venison Sausage Co. at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (/czxp)

206 Nutria have long skinny tails. Beavers have paddle tails, and otters are just as cute as they can be.

Where do I pick up my PHD?
Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (oiNtH)
---------

Sorry, you know the differences between the three, so you don't get the PhD.

But have a rat-hat as a consolation prize.

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (oMtOd)

207

Giant rats in California are nothing new.

Oh, you mean outside Sacramento?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy likes lobster at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (GdWl+)

208 So biologists can't tell the difference between beavers and otters? Really?

Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (7HtZB)

They got their degrees from Fresno State.

Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (7UW64)

209 So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Posted by: Diogenes

Giant anaconda or giant boa. These things are bigger than a jack russell.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (2ifxQ)

210 Its almost like California does not understand the ramifications of Darwin...

Oh... wait... they don't... just look at how they ignore HUMAN Biology.

Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (NgKpN)

211 >>In California it is a violation of their civil rights to ask them their specific class of rodent.

"I identify as a possum!"

Posted by: Guam at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (W+vEI)

212 Nutria may not do as well in a free running river. Take down the dams! Free the Hetch Hetchy! For the children!

Posted by: 2009Refugee at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (Ke0ij)

213 Nutrasweet + Stevia = Nutria

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (oVJmc)

214 Uh oh. This just in: the nutria are gay.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (MDlMP)

215 Carter was attacked by a swamp rabbit IIRC. They are s big s jackrabbits, and have been known to be aggressive.

Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (o2MD2)

216
Earthquake NOW!!!

Posted by: Soothie at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (sw1f5)

217 They've got the Ph.D.'s on this to figure out how many genders of nutria there are.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (MDlMP)

218 209 So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Posted by: Diogenes

Giant anaconda or giant boa. These things are bigger than a jack russell.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (2ifxQ)

So we need.... Wolves... and Mountain Lions... and maybe Bears.... oh my...

Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (NgKpN)

219 I binged Nutria predators and got:

bald eagles and hawks, cottonmouth snakes, garfish, dogs, turtles and alligators.

what's a garfish?
Posted by: @votermom

Bing alligator gar.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (2ifxQ)

220
What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

I think they are referring to being able to get knocked up again in 48 hours. No mammal has a gestational period that short.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (pNxlR)

221 If they are like whistle pigs, watch out. Whistle Pigs drag off their dead like the VC, usually to consume them later.

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (BF6Fv)

222 204 I binged Nutria predators and got:

bald eagles and hawks, cottonmouth snakes, garfish, dogs, turtles and alligators.

---

If you binged on all that, I'd purge, immediately.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (AzW6q)

223 59 The article describes these animals as "a kind of giant river rat."

"Hell, we've had them things in Loozyana for centuries, 'n' nobody ever' died."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius

State used to pay $5 a tail.
Posted by: rickb223

I get almost twice that at truckstops.

Posted by: Stormy Daniels at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (kfcYC)

224 STOP ANTI-RODENTISM

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (oVJmc)

225 when exactly did they escape from the fire swamp?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (h/uSM)

226 Carter was attacked by a swamp rabbit IIRC. They are s big s jackrabbits, and have been known to be aggressive.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (o2MD2)
---------

Little known fact: they modeled the Easter bunny suit worn at the White House Easter Egg roll after Carter's attack rabbit.

(Did you see the photos of that thing? Hilarious.)

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (oMtOd)

227 what's a garfish?
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (hMwEB)
---------------------------
I think he's pitching for the Cubs now.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (0jtPF)

228 214 Uh oh. This just in: the nutria are gay.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (MDlMP)

No, we're actually pretty pissed off!

Posted by: Nutria at Starbucks at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (RD7QR)

229
OK - get this! Back in the day, people imported these gross bastards (on purpose!) to the US to be farmed for fur.
However, it turns out that fashionable ladies didn't want to wear swamp-rat fur, and the farms were not profitable. The farmers simply released them into the wild to prosper.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (AzW6q)

The iconic palm trees in Southern California were originally brought here and planted as a source of cheap lumber but they were the wrong type of palm for that.

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (lKyWE)

230 Carp, sea lampreys and zebra mussels are taking over the Great Lakes. How come it's alway things that are not useful.

Oh and pythons in FL.

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (s9DTK)

231 If Carter had been killed by the attack rabbit who wins the presidency in 76?

Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 01:11 PM (LiyEm)

232 So biologists can't tell the difference between beavers and otters? Really?

Well, California, so left wing biologists... Yeah big problems, beavers, otters, musk rats, giant killer rats - hard to tell them apart.

Posted by: An Observation at April 19, 2018 01:11 PM (QGEI2)

233
Cheetos
Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (+F0Wk)

Glenn Beck will be out there with soccer balls and other toys for the little 'uns in two shakes of a nutria's tail!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:11 PM (pNxlR)

234 Commiefornia is way too stupid to be part of the US. CALEXIT Now!

Posted by: Dope at April 19, 2018 01:11 PM (7ag4s)

235 Funny.... Colorado has had a Prairie Dog problem forever...

Used to be they were controlled by natural forces... or shot by farmer...

Now, they actually use a Vacuum cleaner to suck them out of their dens, and then supposedly transplant them to someplace they won't bother Humans...

Which means.... they come back every damn year.

Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2018 01:12 PM (NgKpN)

236 what's a garfish?

You know what at an Alligator Gar is? Same thing.

Posted by: Holden at April 19, 2018 01:12 PM (yQpMk)

237

EM AGIORGITIKO FOADDY-FI!!!

Posted by: Maxine Waters' Hair at April 19, 2018 01:12 PM (mPeei)

238 OK - get this! Back in the day, people imported these gross bastards (on purpose!) to the US to be farmed for fur.

However, it turns out that fashionable ladies didn't want to wear swamp-rat fur, and the farms were not profitable. The farmers simply released them into the wild to prosper.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (AzW6q)

So they imported them, and only THEN found out that ladies didn't want their fur.

Marketing genius.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:12 PM (MDlMP)

239 What if a Nutria self identifies as a cat?

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable and Profoundly Unserious at April 19, 2018 01:12 PM (pw+jk)

240 Nutria - Adults are typically 8.8 to 19.8 lbs.
16 - 24 in body length & 12 to 18 in tail.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:12 PM (2ifxQ)

241 211

"I identify as a possum!"
Posted by: Guam at April 19, 2018
*
*
Now that is one primitive-looking animal. My big black cat once encountered an opossum when he, the cat I mean, was living outdoors. The cat and opossum looked calmly at each other, then each turned and went his separate way. I imagine my cat thinking, "Nope. Not gonna eat that."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 01:13 PM (9xaT+)

242 231 If Carter had been killed by the attack rabbit who wins the presidency in 76?
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 01:11 PM (LiyEm)

America.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:13 PM (MDlMP)

243 So biologists can't tell the difference between beavers and otters? Really?

Well, California, so left wing biologists... Yeah big problems, beavers, otters, musk rats, giant killer rats - hard to tell them apart.

Posted by: An Observation at April 19, 2018 01:11 PM (QGEI2)

---------------

Plus, in California, it's not enough to identify the species. They have to determine what species the creature identifies as.

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 01:13 PM (+F0Wk)

244 OT: What is a decent image hosting site these days? I need to find a substitute for photobucket.

Posted by: Grey Fox at April 19, 2018 01:13 PM (bZ7mE)

245 what's a garfish?

You know what at an Alligator Gar is? Same thing.
Posted by: Holden at April 19, 2018 01:12 PM (yQpMk)

Alligator gar are much larger .

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 01:13 PM (s9DTK)

246 Now, they actually use a Vacuum cleaner to suck them out of their dens, and then supposedly transplant them to someplace they won't bother Humans...

---

Some of them are sold to the Japanese, who use them for pets - no kidding.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:13 PM (AzW6q)

247 231 If Carter had been killed by the attack rabbit who wins the presidency in 76?
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 01:11 PM (LiyEm)

Walter Mondale?

Posted by: Surfperch at April 19, 2018 01:13 PM (J7NdS)

248 So they imported them, and only THEN found out that ladies didn't want their fur.

Marketing genius.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:12 PM (MDlMP)
---------

The marketing geniuses' descendants are the PhDs out there trying to figure out what's a nutria.

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:13 PM (oMtOd)

249
California declares state of emergency over massive population growth of illegal aliens. (The jokes just write themselves here)
Have at it.

Posted by: krakatoa at 12:42 PM

Comments
(Jump to bottom of page)

1 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria - their very name indicates they are nutritious.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:44 PM (vkS2Z)

2 Rats!!!
Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (xqfqx)

3 Weren't these suspected in the infamous Carter Rabbit Attack?
Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (AM1GF)

4 California could just change it's name to "State of Emergency."
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (O7MnT)

5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

6 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria

Soylent Brown?
Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (wW03z)

7 I just noticed that when I post I seem to go back in time by about 8 minutes. The incredible powers of Pixy!
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (vkS2Z)

8 They could market these inveders under the product name Nutria System... with more electrolytes.
Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (zSVEm)

9 California politicians have finally met some illegal aliens they don't want to feed and subsidize with taxpayer dollars?

Will wonders never cease!

On the plus side, giant rats will fit in well with the rest of the vermin currently infesting CA.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (fqUgw)

10 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

-----------------

Cheetos
Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (+F0Wk)

11 Wait, I've been told illegal immigration is a net plus to our economy.

Posted by: WisRich at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (G0vdT)

12 Two things are certain. First, no one will propose a wall to deal with this. Second, whatever they do proposed will be utterly useless and not solve the problem at all.
Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (XOEc2)

13 Nutria-phobic racism!!!!
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (hMwEB)

14 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
________________

He forgot to floss.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (fqUgw)

15 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

To mask the Cheetos stains.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (vkS2Z)

16 Looks like Lisa Page.
Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (xqfqx)

17 California could just change it's name to "State of Emergency."
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (O7MnT)

I think we're past that. State of Morbidity would be more like it.
Posted by: Dan Smoot's Apprentice at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (H8QX

18 they're just un-documented rodents.
Posted by: USMC8541 at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (NmR1a)

19 The article describes these animals as "a kind of giant river rat."

"Hell, we've had them things in Loozyana for centuries, 'n' nobody ever' died."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (9xaT+)

20 Sort of looks like Henry Waxman.
Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (zSVEm)

21 Cheetos

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (+F0Wk)

Finest minds thinking alike.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (vkS2Z)

22 1 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria - their very name indicates they are nutritious.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:44 PM (vkS2Z)

Supposedly they taste like rabbit.
Posted by: Surfperch at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (J7NdS)

23 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

*

California health care at its finest.

Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (xqfqx)

24 "Nutria are about two and a half feet long with a twelve inch tail. Their whiskers are white and their hind feet webbed."

------

Aaaaahhhh!!!!
Rodents of Unusual Size
Kill it with fire!!!
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (hMwEB)

25 I can't stand its accusing stare. I cried.
Posted by: Morrissey at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (loZXu)

26 California : The Sound of 30 Million Farts all at once.
Posted by: Hikaru at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (9TK8E)

27 State of decomposition
Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (XOEc2)

28 California could just change it's name to "State of Emergency."
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo

State of Paranoia
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (2ifxQ)

29 State of chaos.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (vkS2Z)

30 At least they don't vote.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

31 Would it be wrong if someone placed Nutria families in certain CA neighborhoods?
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (r9UYA)

32 >>Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

California requires Carrots in the Chili.
Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (o7yn2)

33 3 Weren't these suspected in the infamous Carter Rabbit Attack?
Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (AM1GF)

That rabbit's dynamite!
Posted by: Arthur, King of The Britons at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (7HtZB)

34 I am introducing emergency legislation to ensure that these nutria qualify for in-state tuition rates.
Posted by: CA State Legislator at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (ppBhU)

35 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

Like other rodents, they do not have enamel on their teeth and their teeth continually grow through their entire life span.
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (BF6Fv)

36 It's CA. I could give a rats ass.
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (EDSlc)

37 Nutrias at the Gates.. would make a fine movie..
Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (zSVEm)

38 Aaaaahhhh!!!!
Rodents of Unusual Size
Kill it with fire!!!
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (hMwEB)

---------

I don't think they really exist
Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (+F0Wk)

39 30 At least they don't vote.
_______________

Oh no? Hahaha. We love your optimism and naivete'
Posted by: CA Dim Party at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (fqUgw)

40 30 At least they don't vote.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

Not yet.
Posted by: Random Hawaiian Judge #7 at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (7HtZB)

41 Nutrias are natural DemocRATS
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (hMwEB)

42 I seem to recall a flap about 30 years ago when a suburban parish's deputies were entertaining themselves, and cleaning up the neighborhood, by shooting the nutria running around the open drainage canals. (Yes, Virginia, Noo Awlins' suburbs have open drainage canals all over. There are occasional fences, but it's still possible on a dark rainy night to drive into the canal and drown.)

But of course, CA's officials won't do that.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (9xaT+)

43 Don't those things cause cancer?
Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (RD7QR)

44
No Nutria is Illegal!
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (r+sAi)

45 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius

Gnawing trees/bark/tannins.
They gnaw to keep their teeth filed down.
Teeth are always growing.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (2ifxQ)

46 That rabbit's dynamite!

Posted by: Arthur, King of The Britons at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

Look at all the bones!
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (EDSlc)

47 >> at least they don't vote

Why not? It's very difficult for them to get IDs.
Posted by: Dems at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (XOEc2)

48 Drop dry ice down their holes!
Posted by: Kaiser Wilhelm at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (+y/Ru)

49 30 At least they don't vote.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

ANIMALS ARE PEOPLE TOO!!!!! THEY DESERVE A RIGHT TO VOTE!!!!!
Posted by: PETA at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (J7NdS)

50 I thought nutria was one of those super foods vegans like to eat.
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (nBr1j)

51 Just to follow up on post of person shot in Walmart. It's not as simple as what was posted. You can google John Crawford III to get the full story.
Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (s9DTK)

52 They could always divert the Oroville Dam repair funds to help get rid of the rats.
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (r9UYA)

53 I should think CA would want to arm it's citizens so that they can eradicate these evil ROUS's. Yeah. Lots of guns. That's the ticket.

Or, they could just open a Planned Nutria Parenthood in the neighborhood. That seems to be fairly efficient at killing off undesirables.
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (7UW64)

54 At least they don't vote.

Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)
**
I tried for years to get the little rats on the voter roles! Stupid bastards couldn't sign their names!

Posted by: Barbara Boxer at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (xqfqx)

55 Just wait... someone in Coleforrnia will start self identifying as a nutria...
Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (zSVEm)

56 Mmmmmm. Bet that would be tasty with a tarantula on top.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (o2MD2)

57 How big are they?
Posted by: Richard Gere at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (djCea)

58 I don't think they really exist

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (+F0Wk)

That's what the Fire Swamp WANTS you to think.
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (hMwEB)

59 The article describes these animals as "a kind of giant river rat."

"Hell, we've had them things in Loozyana for centuries, 'n' nobody ever' died."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius

State used to pay $5 a tail.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (2ifxQ)

60 Have they tried Acme products?
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (+y/Ru)

61 Nutria is lLatin for 'Shadow Varmint'.
Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (gDv6

62 IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE THEY REFUSE TO DEPLOY THEIR NATIONAL GUARD TO THE BORDER.
Posted by: BEN ROETHLISBERGER at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (W+vEI)

63 Nutrias at the Gates.. would make a fine movie..

Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

Nutrinado!!!!
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (EDSlc)

64 #NutriaLivesMatter
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (MDlMP)

65 Looks like beaver to me.
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

66 35 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

Like other rodents, they do not have enamel on their teeth and their teeth continually grow through their entire life span.
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018
*
*
So when they grow some more, they'll come out a different color? How about blue?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (9xaT+)

67
Full of nutrients and beta kerosenes!
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (VM6ev)

68 And here I thought that it would be an article on how the invasive species Illegalus Mexicanus was impacting the local San Francisco fauna Homo Sexualus.
Posted by: Anonymous White Male at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (9BLnV)

69 New Orleans has teams shoot them at night ... sounds fun.

The whole invasive species thing really is a lesson in "diversity". Many of the invaders (plants mostly) that take over and destroy lands were deliberately introduced for some good purpose ... then they wipe out everything.
Posted by: illiniwek at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (bT8Z4)

70 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (hMwEB)

71 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
______________

We recommended they use Ora-jet toothbrushes, but the handles kept slipping through their claws.
Posted by: American Dental Assoc. at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (fqUgw)

72 House the nutria with the illegals? House the illegals with the nutria? Do both?
Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (RD7QR)

73 65 Looks like beaver to me.
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

"Be like a beaver, and split!"

- - The California Nutria Marketing Board

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (VM6ev)

74 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria

Soylent Brown?

Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM

Sorry, I read that as feed the homeless To the nutria.
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (EDSlc)

75 They don't sit still on the cast couch either.

Rat Bastards.

Posted by: Harvey Weinstein at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (xqfqx)

76
Supposedly our forebears nearly wiped out the beaver and the buffalo, but we can't have a Nutria Fur Coat industry?

Come on America, we know how to kill these things.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (r+sAi)

77 30 At least they don't vote.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

Are you kidding?

The nutria and the delta smelt are two core Democrat constituencies.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (MDlMP)

78 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Not even close

You can trust me. I'm a professional.
Posted by: Peter North at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (fiGNd)

79 65 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Good heavens, man, how long has it been?
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (7UW64)

80 "16 Looks like Lisa Page.

Posted by: dananjcon"

Considering she looks like Joey Ramone's homely sister, she's got to bring something to the table to have a husband and bf simultaneously. However, I won't speculate what that is at this family friendly site. But tennis ball and garden hose come to mind.
Posted by: Benji Carver at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (OD2ni)

81 They're a type of weasel.
Posted by: Larsen E. Whipsnade at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (bML9A)

82 California needs to invest in green powered leaf blowers.
Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (2LelM)

83 CNN is super-excited because "Cohen is about to flip."
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (O7MnT)

84 Set up nutria tent-cities and shelters and hand out free food! Let them in the libraries---and Starbucks!--- to watch porn!
If you're super-nice to them, they won't chew your bridge down!
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (0jtPF)

85 From the interwebz: Nutria numbers in Louisiana are now estimated at 20 million. The state pays a bounty of $4 for every nutria tail and typically gets about 300,000 tails a year.

Opportunity for enterprising youngsters.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (vkS2Z)

86 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale

Dreamers. Even Speedy Gonzalez has dreams you privileged Caucasian!
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (EDSlc)

87 Trump hates Nutrias and wants to deport them. Save the Nutrias! Impnutria foddy-fi!
Posted by: mindful webworker says pftth at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (ATv6t)

88 Mebbe the California shitheads can give the Nutria free condoms so they will start to deplete, or maybe taxpayer paid abortions.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (o2MD2)

89 32 >>Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

California requires Carrots in the Chili.

Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

mic drop.
Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (0tfLf)

90 71 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
______________

We recommended they use Ora-jet toothbrushes, but the handles kept slipping through their claws.
Posted by: American Dental Assoc. at April 19, 2018
*
*
My favorite comment yet.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (9xaT+)

91 In Alabama, the authorities imported alligators to cope with the beaver population.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (yQpMk)

92 79 65 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Good heavens, man, how long has it been?
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (7UW64)

The power of a missing article. (a)
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (nBr1j)

93 OH! EM! JEE! Teh Kyoot!!! It burns!

You know why CA has a housing crisis? I11egals. Well, without them, there'd be a lot less competition for housing, and no, they don't all live 2 dozen to a 1 BR.
Posted by: SFgoth at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (dZ756)

94 "It's a triple threat. It's public safety, it's the economy, it's the environment. If nutria get established in California, there's almost no hope of removing them. That's why we are acting so quickly."

The lack of self-awareness....
Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (W+vEI)

95 30 At least they don't vote.

Yet... We'll see about that
Posted by: T. Liu at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (hdFyL)

96 The whole invasive species thing really is a lesson in "diversity". Many of the invaders (plants mostly) that take over and destroy lands were deliberately introduced for some good purpose ... then they wipe out everything.
Posted by: illiniwek

Kudzu
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (2ifxQ)

97 Governor Jerry Brown announced he will deploy "up to 400 National Guard Troops" to do nothing. The crime rate in California is high enough, and the Federal Government will not be paying for Governor Brown's charade. We need border security and action, not words!

@RealDonaldTrump 1h

Not to mention yuge face eating rodents.
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (r9UYA)

98 79
65 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Good heavens, man, how long has it been?

Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (7UW64)

For some of us too long.
Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (gjGvH)

99 Doing the jobs that muskrats won't do!
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (w1zJX)

100 67
Full of nutrients and beta kerosenes!
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (VM6ev)

When you shoot them they make a sound like a dog...woof!!!
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (BF6Fv)

101 Aaaaahhhh!!!!

Rodents of Unusual Size

Kill it with fire!!!

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM

I don't believe they exist.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Westley at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (p+Wdc)

102
Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

They're protesting Trump's tough stand on illegal immigration. They'd wear pussy hats but they haven' t figured out how to put them on their heads yet.
Posted by: Solyndra at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (lKyWE)

103 34 I am introducing emergency legislation to ensure that these nutria qualify for in-state tuition rates.
Posted by: CA State Legislator at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (ppBhU)

In-state? Previous waves of illegal aliens get FREE tuition.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (MDlMP)

104 57 How big are they?
Posted by: Richard Gere at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (djCea)

Small enough for you, no worries.
Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (RD7QR)

105 Nutria? Isn't that something you spread on toast?
Posted by: SFgoth at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (dZ756)

106 Sigh. More wetbacks.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (MDlMP)

107 Considering she looks like Joey Ramone's homely sister, she's got to bring something to the table to have a husband and bf simultaneously. However, I won't speculate what that is at this family friendly site. But tennis ball and garden hose come to mind.
========

All deliveries in the rear.
Posted by: Lisa P. at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (vg8iE)

108 I remember a mean chat sometimes used when I was in elementary school "fat, fat water rat."
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (nBr1j)

109 In Alabama, the authorities imported alligators to cope with the beaver population.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (yQpMk)

If only they'd just quit slaughtering them every fall ...
Posted by: Peter North at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (fiGNd)

110 70 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (hMwEB)

They were "introduced" into California in the 1890's!
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (vkS2Z)

111 Like other rodents, they do not have enamel on their teeth and their teeth continually grow through their entire life span.
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

But we'll put fluoride in the water, because.
Posted by: California State Bureau of Nutria Dental Care at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (ctuyM)

112 #NutriaToo
Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (xqfqx)

113 Kudzu
Posted by: rickb223
------------

The introduction of Kudzu was a government project.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (5OO3x)

114 I told you about this shit, and everybody laughed at me!
Posted by: Jimmy Carter at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (MDlMP)

115 Speaking of invasive rats:

Cuomo on the history of Italian immigrants facing discrimination: "You want to deport immigrants start with me, because I'm an undocumented person."

Dude, you've convinced me. Get on the boat!
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (+y/Ru)

116 Perchance were you a student at Sunny Terrace? I remember that one as well.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (vkS2Z)

117 "It's a triple threat. It's public safety, it's the economy, it's the environment. If nutria get established in California, there's almost no hope of removing them. That's why we are acting so quickly."

Triple threat identified! Unlike what's coming across our Southern border that endangers public safety, economy, and the environment.

What until these big rats get driver's licenses!

Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (oiNtH)

118 $5 for tail
Looks like beaver

Krakatoa is right, the jokes write themselves.
Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (0tfLf)

119 Is there a hunting season for Nutria in Kalifornia?
Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (gjGvH)

120 As I recall, nutria don't really look much like rats. They're a little cuter -- more like groundhogs.

"Not bad for a quadruped."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (9xaT+)

121 Off Porn Legend sock !!!
Posted by: ScoggDog at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (fiGNd)

122 Nutria are natural Republicans. We should welcome them
Posted by: Ripley at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (MxEKc)

123 I would pay to see Jerry Brown ass porked by a nutria.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (o2MD2)

124 76
Supposedly our forebears nearly wiped out the beaver and the buffalo, but we can't have a Nutria Fur Coat industry?

Come on America, we know how to kill these things.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (r+sAi)
-------------------------------
Nutria fur is very soft and nice.
Honestly, if it weren't for the PETA crowd, the problem really would take care of itself.
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (0jtPF)

125 A team of biologists has been trained to trap the nutria. And it can difficult to tell the difference between nutria and non-threatening animals like beavers, otters and muskrats

"It's tricky to identify them. We have wildlife biologists, PhDs out there trying to understand and identify them. It's been challenging," said Tira.

PhDs, man. P ... h ... Ds!!
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (7ieWW)

126 The introduction of Kudzu was a government project.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (5OO3x)

We're from the government, and we're here to help.
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (7UW64)

127 They are amphibious whistle pigs.
Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (2LelM)

128 Also from interwebz: The critters were first introduced from South America to this country in 1899 in California.

California has a lot to answer for.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (vkS2Z)

129 Upskirt shot of Lena Dunham?
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (nBr1j)

130
Vox
@voxdotcom
The Parkland students are leading a master class in how to deal with bullies.

Well, you can't say they don't need it.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (+y/Ru)

131 From the article:

"Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (oMtOd)

132 Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (+y/Ru)

Why do politicians make these stupid statements?. You were born here, Cuomo. You father was born here. I expect the relatives you had from Italy came here legally through Ellis Island.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (tpDAe)

133 There was an article somewhere about the problem with these critters in Louisiana. Apparently they were brought in decades ago as a source for furs, which would provide income to them there deplorable folks who live in the swamp. The fur industry has collapsed, thanks to progs, and the Nutria are a-swarmin'. They apparently taste OK, and there's some effort to make them part of N'Orleans cookin', according to this article - which I can't find now. But trust me....
Posted by: George V at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (LUHWu)

134 The whole invasive species thing really is a lesson in "diversity". Many of the invaders (plants mostly) that take over and destroy lands were deliberately introduced for some good purpose ... then they wipe out everything.
_____________________

Raaaaaaaaaacist h8ter!!!

Everybody knows that diversity is an unquestioned, and unquestionable, good!

And if you don't agree, we will keeeeeeeeeel you!

Posted by: CAIR at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (fqUgw)

135 #LetThemVote
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (oVJmc)

136
"Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.

Their teeth are fast as lightning!

ICE spokesfolks, clutching their sides from laughter, could not summon a comment.
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (pNxlR)

137 From the interwebz: Nutria numbers in Louisiana are now estimated at 20 million. The state pays a bounty of $4 for every nutria tail and typically gets about 300,000 tails a year.

Opportunity for enterprising youngsters.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (vkS2Z)

I read there was a similar program for rats in Vietnam a while back. It got cancelled when officials noticed tailless rats running around the city. The people were taking the tails, but leaving the rats to breed so the gravy train could continue.
Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (+F0Wk)

138 130
Vox
@voxdotcom
The Parkland students are leading a master class in how to deal with bullies.

Well, you can't say they don't need it.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (+y/Ru)

How mentally torture a kid and make him grab a rifle?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (VM6ev)

139
Supposedly they taste like rabbit

+++

Which in turn tastes like chicken
Posted by: Bigbys Cellphone at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (/JlMC)

140 $5. Same as in town.
Posted by: Just the Punchline at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (yQpMk)

141 "Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell

Once they drop a litter, they can go to pound town again in 48 hours.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (2ifxQ)

142 There goes the neighborhood.
Posted by: Sewer Rat at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (djCea)

143 The cool job is riding in the back of a pickup through New Orleans at 0200 shooting nutria with a scoped/silenced rifle. This is probably the only honest work the NOPD does.
Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (2LelM)

144 129
Upskirt shot of Lena Dunham?

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (nBr1j)

God, I need mind bleach for what I just imagined.
Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (gjGvH)

145 It looks like Adam Schiff is gonna take Trump's pardon pen away from him.
Posted by: Bill W at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (Z4UvQ)

146 Nutria fur is very soft and nice.
Honestly, if it weren't for the PETA crowd, the problem really would take care of itself.
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (0jtPF)
----------

Isn't that why they were brought here in the first place? I thought there were nutria farms for that very purpose.

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (oMtOd)

147 "It's a triple threat. It's public safety, it's the economy, it's the environment. If nutria get established in California, there's almost no hope of removing them."

I said the same thing about liberals from the Northeast and upper Midwest 40 years ago, and yet here we are.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (MDlMP)

148
Wait! Wait! Jerry's dealt with this sort of thing before!

Spray infested areas with Paraquat!
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (pNxlR)

149 "Louisiana has also battled a much larger nutria invasion. But as to how the rodents ended up in California, nobody is quite sure."

Well, lets see...what happened in Louisiana a few years ago that caused a huge shift in population where the government relocated a bunch of people and what was left of their belongings to other states, like California.
Hmmmm....
Let me think.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (0tfLf)

150 I would like to see property taxes increased 10 percent statewide to fight this rodent scourge. No, make it 15 percent.
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (r9UYA)

151 Around here, I mostly have to deal with moose in the yard, on the street, and in the school yard. We have one very naughty young bull that hangs around the house and causes any amount of havoc.

A couple of weeks ago the boy was down the street at a friend's house, and called to say he was going to be late because he couldn't walk home past the moose. So, DH got in the truck and drove three houses down to pick him up.

This is the same bull who stripped the apples off my sweet apple tree, drooled all over the deck, and then broke off branches because he couldn't get to the ones higher up.

If I didn't live in town, he would be happily residing on my freezer by now.
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (7UW64)

152 "Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.
========

Peter Tira-Puffer
Posted by: bicentennialguy at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (vg8iE)

153 I declare Mexicans an invasive species. Brown needs to Fight invasion by killing his dumbass self/
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (o2MD2)

154
I saw Invasive Species open for Three Dog Night at the Spectrum.
Posted by: Forgot My Nic at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (LOgQ4)

155

Nutriasweet
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (IqV8l)

156 Once they drop a litter, they can go to pound town again in 48 hours.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (2ifxQ)

Nutria can do that too.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (MDlMP)

157
"It's tricky to identify them. We have wildlife biologists, PhDs out there trying to understand and identify them. It's been challenging," said Tira.

Men don't need a fancy shmancy degree to tell you that chasing beaver is time consuming and expensive
Posted by: Solyndra at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (lKyWE)

158 I imagine they taste at least as good as opossum.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (yQpMk)

159
You have to give California credit - their diet is enriched in irony.
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (pNxlR)

160 >>What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Sounds more like Tribbles.

Are these wicked-smaat PhDs who can't tell the difference between a Nutria and a beaver sure these aren't Tribbles?
Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (W+vEI)

161 So is the problem that they might vote republican?
Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (h/uSM)

162 151 Around here, I mostly have to deal with moose in the yard, on the street, and in the school yard. We have one very naughty young bull that hangs around the house and causes any amount of havoc.

A couple of weeks ago the boy was down the street at a friend's house, and called to say he was going to be late because he couldn't walk home past the moose. So, DH got in the truck and drove three houses down to pick him up.

This is the same bull who stripped the apples off my sweet apple tree, drooled all over the deck, and then broke off branches because he couldn't get to the ones higher up.

If I didn't live in town, he would be happily residing on my freezer by now.
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (7UW64)

Deer poop in the yard is the worst I have to deal--well that and deer choosing to randomly jump onto the highway.
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (nBr1j)

163 I read there was a similar program for rats in Vietnam a while back. It got cancelled when officials noticed tailless rats running around the city. The people were taking the tails, but leaving the rats to breed so the gravy train could continue.
-------------------
Yep. That sounds like Asia.
Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (2LelM)

164 "Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."
=======

What the fuck are they? Tribbles?
Posted by: bicentennialguy at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (vg8iE)

165 131 From the article:

"Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018
*
*
I suspect the "writer" meant something like "the nutria can get pregnant again within 48 hours after giving birth." You're right, the other way makes them sound like tribbles with legs.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (9xaT+)

166 Is there a hunting season for Nutria in Kalifornia?

What will you hunt with, a semi-auto in California?
Posted by: Leland at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (kB2km)

167 As part of the upcoming Harry and Meghan marital extravaganza, "Crown Jewels Heritage Condoms" are being made available, at the low, low price of 10 Pounds for a box of 4.

Described as being "fit for a prince", the box features a picture of the happy couple.

As the box is opened, the British and American national anthems ring out, presumably to induce standing at attention.
Posted by: Moron News YOU can use! at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (ctuyM)

168
Off swindling sock
Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (lKyWE)

169 125 A team of biologists has been trained to trap the nutria. And it can difficult to tell the difference between nutria and non-threatening animals like beavers, otters and muskrats

"It's tricky to identify them. We have wildlife biologists, PhDs out there trying to understand and identify them. It's been challenging," said Tira.

PhDs, man. P ... h ... Ds!!
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (7ieWW)

So biologists can't tell the difference between beavers and otters? Really?
Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (7HtZB)

170 I have young relatives in Louisiana that have made a fair amount of money shooting nutrea.
Posted by: Moron Robbie - SJWs Destroyed My Garden Because I Grew Heritage Tomatoes at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (4EJjM)

171 I'm sure Nutria has already been served as General Tzo's chicken somewhere...
Posted by: BluesFish at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (KG+lL)

172 The solution will involve an obscene increase in taxes and painting river banks white.
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (nBr1j)

173 Notice how we hear endlessly about David Hogg, but no Nikolas Cruz has gone down the memory hole?

No info of his motivation, background, manifesto, or anything else.

I would think that the most important person to listen to from that killing would be the still-alive killer and not some opportunistic bystander.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oVJmc)

174 So what they're really saying is that they can get pregnant again 48 hours after giving birth?

Sloppy writing.

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oMtOd)

175 I believe Louisiana pays a bounty on nutria.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (o2MD2)

176 Well honestly, between the Nutria and Henry Waxman, the Nutria is a 10.
Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oiNtH)

177 This thread reminds me - what's new on the 3-legged doe that was hanging around Jane's house?
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (hMwEB)

178 Free food source for the homeless. I don't see a problem.
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (r9UYA)

179 There must be some way CA can tax them.
Posted by: wth at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (HgMAr)

180
Isn't that why they were brought here in the first place? I thought there were nutria farms for that very purpose.
___________________

There was a Seinfeld episode where Elaine went crazy with the Peterson's company credit card, and let George charge an expensive fur hat (Russian sable or something).

When the company accountant told her she had to account for all her spending, she replaced the hat with a cheap nutria-fur hat, but the accountant wasn't fooled and told her he could recognize a "rat hat" when he saw one.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (fqUgw)

181
... stripped the apples off my sweet apple tree, drooled all over the deck, and then broke off branches because he couldn't get to the ones higher up ...

I'll take "Drop-In Phrases for Any Mo-Mee Promotional Brochure" for $600, Alex!
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (pNxlR)

182 166
Is there a hunting season for Nutria in Kalifornia?

What will you hunt with, a semi-auto in California?

Posted by: Leland at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (kB2km)

Given it's Kalifornia, maybe slingshot or rocks and sticks.
Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (gjGvH)

183 When will the nutria in the photo by the Democratic Party caucus chairman?
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (nBr1j)

184 What they need to do is use a few nutria pelts to design some clothes, then pay a coupla Kardashians to model them on Instagram, and then - BOOM! - problem solved.
Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (W+vEI)

185 141 "Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell

Once they drop a litter, they can go to pound town again in 48 hours.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM

So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (0tfLf)

186 Much as I dislike Carter - what he described sounded to me like a rabbit suffering from rabies.

I would have written "rabid rabbit" but that would have started an entirely noxious chain of posts.

Posted by: An Observation at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (QGEI2)

187
"Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.

Nutria in a Starbucks - now THAT would be frightening, fear-for-your-life frightening.
Posted by: Hands at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (EzdLW)

188 >>>It's tricky to identify them.

Picture IDs are racist.
Posted by: Progglodyte at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (djCea)

189 Stop the genocide!

We need programs for the Nutria-Americans!
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (MDlMP)

190 70 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something

---

OK - get this! Back in the day, people imported these gross bastards (on purpose!) to the US to be farmed for fur.

However, it turns out that fashionable ladies didn't want to wear swamp-rat fur, and the farms were not profitable. The farmers simply released them into the wild to prosper.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (AzW6q)

191 So what they're really saying is that they can get pregnant again 48 hours after giving birth?

Sloppy writing.

Posted by: bluebell

Yeah.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (2ifxQ)

192 180
Isn't that why they were brought here in the first place? I thought there were nutria farms for that very purpose.
___________________

There was a Seinfeld episode where Elaine went crazy with the Peterson's company credit card, and let George charge an expensive fur hat (Russian sable or something).

When the company accountant told her she had to account for all her spending, she replaced the hat with a cheap nutria-fur hat, but the accountant wasn't fooled and told her he could recognize a "rat hat" when he saw one.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (fqUgw)

"And a poorly made one, even by rat-hat standards."
Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (7HtZB)

193 "It's tricky to identify them"
...

In California it is a violation of their civil rights to ask them their specific class of rodent.
Posted by: Tanner Boyle at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (2wOtx)

194
176 Well honestly, between the Nutria and Henry Waxman, the Nutria is a 10.
Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oiNtH)

Threadwinner! Shut 'er down!
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (pNxlR)

195 Eucalyptus trees in CA don't help either. They burn like a flame thrower.
Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (s9DTK)

196 Nutria have long skinny tails. Beavers have paddle tails, and otters are just as cute as they can be.

Where do I pick up my PHD?
Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (oiNtH)

197 145 It looks like Adam Schiff is gonna take Trump's pardon pen away from him.
Posted by: Bill W at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (Z4UvQ)
------------------------------
Is he going to sneak into the Oval Office tonight or what?!?

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (0jtPF)

198 187
"Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.

Nutria in a Starbucks - now THAT would be frightening, fear-for-your-life frightening.
Posted by: Hands at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (EzdLW)

Give me a real fucking cup of coffee or the tatted up hipster barrista gets it!
Posted by: Nutria at Starbucks at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (RD7QR)

199 6 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria

Soylent Brown?
Posted by: pep

Maybe feed the homeless to the Nutria.
Posted by: Dirks Strewn at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (kfcYC)

200 >>So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Pssst! Want some brown snakes for free?
Will, uh, take care of your problem real good!
Posted by: Guam at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (W+vEI)

201 186 Much as I dislike Carter - what he described sounded to me like a rabbit suffering from rabies.

I would have written "rabid rabbit" but that would have started an entirely noxious chain of posts.

Posted by: An Observation at April 19, 2018
*
*
Avenge me!!!
Posted by: General Woundwort at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (9xaT+)

202 Many were admitted to the Golden State to pad Hillary's election margin.
Posted by: regular joe at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (kb0cx)

203 Announce that Nutria eat marijuana plants and the problem would be solved overnight.
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (r9UYA)

204 I binged Nutria predators and got:

bald eagles and hawks, cottonmouth snakes, garfish, dogs, turtles and alligators.

what's a garfish?
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (hMwEB)

205 This thread reminds me - what's new on the 3-legged doe that was hanging around Jane's house?

-

There is nothing new. Stop asking questions.
Posted by: Venison Sausage Co. at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (/czxp)

206 Nutria have long skinny tails. Beavers have paddle tails, and otters are just as cute as they can be.

Where do I pick up my PHD?
Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (oiNtH)
---------

Sorry, you know the differences between the three, so you don't get the PhD.

But have a rat-hat as a consolation prize.
Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (oMtOd)

207

Giant rats in California are nothing new.

Oh, you mean outside Sacramento?
Posted by: BackwardsBoy likes lobster at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (GdWl+)

208 So biologists can't tell the difference between beavers and otters? Really?

Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (7HtZB)

They got their degrees from Fresno State.
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (7UW64)

209 So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Posted by: Diogenes

Giant anaconda or giant boa. These things are bigger than a jack russell.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (2ifxQ)

210 Its almost like California does not understand the ramifications of Darwin...

Oh... wait... they don't... just look at how they ignore HUMAN Biology.
Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (NgKpN)

211 >>In California it is a violation of their civil rights to ask them their specific class of rodent.

"I identify as a possum!"
Posted by: Guam at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (W+vEI)

212 Nutria may not do as well in a free running river. Take down the dams! Free the Hetch Hetchy! For the children!
Posted by: 2009Refugee at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (Ke0ij)

213 Nutrasweet + Stevia = Nutria
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (oVJmc)

214 Uh oh. This just in: the nutria are gay.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (MDlMP)

215 Carter was attacked by a swamp rabbit IIRC. They are s big s jackrabbits, and have been known to be aggressive.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (o2MD2)

216
Earthquake NOW!!!
Posted by: Soothie at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (sw1f5)

217 They've got the Ph.D.'s on this to figure out how many genders of nutria there are.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (MDlMP)

218 209 So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Posted by: Diogenes

Giant anaconda or giant boa. These things are bigger than a jack russell.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (2ifxQ)

So we need.... Wolves... and Mountain Lions... and maybe Bears.... oh my...
Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (NgKpN)

219 I binged Nutria predators and got:

bald eagles and hawks, cottonmouth snakes, garfish, dogs, turtles and alligators.

what's a garfish?
Posted by: @votermom

Bing alligator gar.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (2ifxQ)

220
What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

I think they are referring to being able to get knocked up again in 48 hours. No mammal has a gestational period that short.
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (pNxlR)

221 If they are like whistle pigs, watch out. Whistle Pigs drag off their dead like the VC, usually to consume them later.
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (BF6Fv)

222 204 I binged Nutria predators and got:

bald eagles and hawks, cottonmouth snakes, garfish, dogs, turtles and alligators.

---

If you binged on all that, I'd purge, immediately.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (AzW6q)

223 59 The article describes these animals as "a kind of giant river rat."

"Hell, we've had them things in Loozyana for centuries, 'n' nobody ever' died."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius

State used to pay $5 a tail.
Posted by: rickb223

I get almost twice that at truckstops.
Posted by: Stormy Daniels at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (kfcYC)

224 STOP ANTI-RODENTISM
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (oVJmc)

225 when exactly did they escape from the fire swamp?
Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (h/uSM)

226 Carter was attacked by a swamp rabbit IIRC. They are s big s jackrabbits, and have been known to be aggressive.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (o2MD2)
---------

Little known fact: they modeled the Easter bunny suit worn at the White House Easter Egg roll after Carter's attack rabbit.

(Did you see the photos of that thing? Hilarious.)
Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (oMtOd)

227 what's a garfish?
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (hMwEB)
---------------------------
I think he's pitching for the Cubs now.
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (0jtPF)

228 214 Uh oh. This just in: the nutria are gay.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (MDlMP)

No, we're actually pretty pissed off!
Posted by: Nutria at Starbucks at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (RD7QR)

229
OK - get this! Back in the day, people imported these gross bastards (on purpose!) to the US to be farmed for fur.
However, it turns out that fashionable ladies didn't want to wear swamp-rat fur, and the farms were not profitable. The farmers simply released them into the wild to prosper.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (AzW6q)

The iconic palm trees in Southern California were originally brought here and planted as a source of cheap lumber but they were the wrong type of palm for that.
Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (lKyWE)

230 Carp, sea lampreys and zebra mussels are taking over the Great Lakes. How come it's alway things that are not useful.

Oh and pythons in FL.
Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (s9DTK)

Liberals and CA.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (MDlMP)

250 No Nutria Is Illegal!

Posted by: The ARC of History at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (Mrl1e)

251 So biologists can't tell the difference between beavers and otters? Really?

Well, California, so left wing biologists... Yeah big problems, beavers, otters, musk rats, giant killer rats - hard to tell them apart.
=======

It's so confusing for us. If only there was sodomy involved.

Posted by: CA Biologists at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (vg8iE)

252 209 So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Posted by: Diogenes

Giant anaconda or giant boa. These things are bigger than a jack russell.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM

I knew it! I just Friggin' A knew it!!!
The will no doubt migrate thru Oregon and with any luck get stopped by the Columbia River. Just what we need in Seattle...giant boas. And not the feathery kind worn by the citizens in Ballard.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (0tfLf)

253
File under, "Oh, For Dumb" ...

www.cultofmac.com/526157/colgate-e1-toothbrush-review/

iPhone compliant tootbrushing.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (pNxlR)

254 232 So biologists can't tell the difference between beavers and otters? Really?

Well, California, so left wing biologists... Yeah big problems, beavers, otters, musk rats, giant killer rats - hard to tell them apart.

====

The problem is, they might LOOK like nutria but we still have to check if they IDENTIFY as nutria.

Posted by: California PhD Biologist at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (hMwEB)

255 Ack! Sorry!

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (MDlMP)

256 Garfish are like fresh water barracudas. Alligator Gars are big, ugly and have a lot of sharp teeth.

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (BF6Fv)

257
They're just looking for a better life.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (BWL+E)

258 Threadwinner! Shut 'er down!
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (pNxlR)

*sigh*

cmd-F and search for the name.

It's in the thread three times now.

Do you know what happens when you say the name three times? He appears and brings his nostrils. We're messing with powers we cannot hope to comprehend here.

Posted by: hogmartin at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (y87Qq)

259 I just hope that there aren't any nutrias in the barrel...

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (MDlMP)

260 *in best Indiana Jones voice*

Rats. Why did it have to be rats?

Posted by: troyriser at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (qUD5Q)

261 Jay, darling . . . .

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (oMtOd)

262 Oh my.

Posted by: The Barrel at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (yQpMk)

263 -
--
Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria

Soylent Brown?

Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM
-----------------------

So that's where Nutella comes from.

Posted by: irright at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (pMGkg)

264 I identify as a protected species.

Posted by: SJW Nutria at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (J7NdS)

265 Put Jay and a Nutria in the barrel together. Fight to the death.

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (s9DTK)

266 Well, that's an embarrelling!

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (+F0Wk)

267 Barrelpocalypse!

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (oVJmc)

268 262 Oh my.
Posted by: The Barrel at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (yQpMk)

Yeah. I'm comin'. /hangs head

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (MDlMP)

269 Dude.

Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (r9UYA)

270 Here's a thought: ask Louisiana how they handle their nutria problem.

Crazy, I know, when you can instead get millions of government money to "study" the problem...

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (W+vEI)

271 I think they are referring to being able to get knocked up again in 48 hours. No mammal has a gestational period that short.
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot

Gestation 130 days. If timed properly, 3 litters a year. Per wiki.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (2ifxQ)

272 Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (MDlMP)

/points to the barrel

Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2018 01:16 PM (NgKpN)

273 If Fluffy the Bunny had taken out Jimmah, there would not have been a 1976 Election. Nobody would have survived the laughing attack.

Posted by: 2009Refugee at April 19, 2018 01:16 PM (Ke0ij)

274 what's a garfish?
Posted by: @votermom

They're big toothy freshwater fish, found mainly in the Mississippi river and tributaries. Usually just called gars.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gar

They are about like a fresh water shark, and can get pretty big. You would not necessarily want to tangle with one, especially a bigger one (8-10 feet long, Alligator gars).

Posted by: Bozo Conservative....living on the prison planet at April 19, 2018 01:16 PM (vcOmj)

275 Shall I recap the conversation?

Oh wait. I already did that.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:16 PM (MDlMP)

276 I strongly encourage the California to import alligators and wolves to deal with this threat. Also to see if they can resurrect sabertooth tigers and the giant short-faced bear.

I can think of few problems with California that could not be solved by the reintroduction of giant short-faced bears.

Posted by: Grey Fox at April 19, 2018 01:16 PM (bZ7mE)

277 WHO THE HELL DO YOU TIINK I AM? STORMY DANIELS??

Posted by: The Barrel at April 19, 2018 01:16 PM (/czxp)

278 Starbucks should just change their business model. Coffee shop for the price of any item on the menu, or temporary office space at $500 per hour. Or something else that would get freeloaders to fork over $5.

Posted by: Downcast at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (YW6Pd)

279 Yeah. I'm comin'. /hangs head
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:15 PM (MDlMP)
----------

All you have to do to get out is identify which one of these is a nutria, which one is an otter, and which one is a beaver.

*hurls 3 nutria into the barrel*

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (oMtOd)

280 this space for rent

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (hMwEB)

281 Garfish are like fresh water barracudas. Alligator Gars are big, ugly and have a lot of sharp teeth.
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death

And so many bones, they aren't worth eating.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (2ifxQ)

282 Boudain on the hoof.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (7ZVPa)

283
Of course the biologists can't identify them. Of the 120 credits required to graduate with the degree 118 of them now are in gender studies, comparative religions, LGBT studies, and social justice.

Posted by: Forgot My Nic at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (LOgQ4)

284
State used to pay $5 a tail.
Posted by: rickb223

$5 a tail

48 hours between giving birth and fertility

Sexual maturity in about 3-4 months

130 gestation period

Up to 13 offspring per litter

I'm sensing a moneymaking opportunity....

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (eXA4G)

285 247 231 If Carter had been killed by the attack rabbit who wins the presidency in 76?
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 01:11 PM (LiyEm)

Walter Mondale?
Posted by: Surfperch at April 19, 2018
*
*
The attack rabbit thing happened in '79 or '80, while Carter was president . . . so the question answers itself. Mondale would have become president and run -- disastrously, one would assume -- against Reagan in 1980. No real historical effect.

But it would have been FUNNY. Garfield and McKinley and Kennedy all brought down by lone assassins . . . and Carter gets it from a vicious bunny attack.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (9xaT+)

286 i wonder how they got there?

Posted by: concrete girl at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (zr8oO)

287 Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM

Stop! Barrel time!

Posted by: MC Hammer's pants at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (p+Wdc)

288 An attack rabbit is really hard to picture.

Posted by: washrivergal at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (Kcf2u)

289
I can think of few problems with California that could not be solved by the reintroduction of giant short-faced bears.

Yeah, but what about when they get tenure at Fresno State?

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (oVJmc)

290 Save the Preble's Meadow Jumping Nutria!

Posted by: Stinky Hippie Bastards at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (+JEb3)

291
In California it is a violation of their civil rights to ask them their specific class of rodent.
"I identify as a possum!"

Posted by: Guam at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (W+vEI)

That makes you a marsupial, but who am I to judge.

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (lKyWE)

292 All you have to do to get out is identify which one of these is a nutria, which one is an otter, and which one is a beaver.

*hurls 3 nutria into the barrel*

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (oMtOd)

That's easy. They're ALL nutria. They're also apparently thought to be conservative, otherwise CA would be encouraging them to come here.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (MDlMP)

293 249
California declares state of emergency over massive population growth of illegal aliens. (The jokes just write themselves here)
Have at it.

Posted by: krakatoa at 12:42 PM

Comments
(Jump to bottom of page)

1 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria - their very name indicates they are nutritious.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:44 PM (vkS2Z)

2 Rats!!!
Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (xqfqx)

3 Weren't these suspected in the infamous Carter Rabbit Attack?
Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (AM1GF)

4 California could just change it's name to "State of Emergency."
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (O7MnT)

5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

6 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria

Soylent Brown?
Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (wW03z)

7 I just noticed that when I post I seem to go back in time by about 8 minutes. The incredible powers of Pixy!
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (vkS2Z)

8 They could market these inveders under the product name Nutria System... with more electrolytes.
Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (zSVEm)

9 California politicians have finally met some illegal aliens they don't want to feed and subsidize with taxpayer dollars?

Will wonders never cease!

On the plus side, giant rats will fit in well with the rest of the vermin currently infesting CA.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (fqUgw)

10 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

-----------------

Cheetos
Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (+F0Wk)

11 Wait, I've been told illegal immigration is a net plus to our economy.

Posted by: WisRich at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (G0vdT)

12 Two things are certain. First, no one will propose a wall to deal with this. Second, whatever they do proposed will be utterly useless and not solve the problem at all.
Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (XOEc2)

13 Nutria-phobic racism!!!!
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (hMwEB)

14 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
________________

He forgot to floss.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (fqUgw)

15 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

To mask the Cheetos stains.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (vkS2Z)

16 Looks like Lisa Page.
Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (xqfqx)

17 California could just change it's name to "State of Emergency."
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (O7MnT)

I think we're past that. State of Morbidity would be more like it.
Posted by: Dan Smoot's Apprentice at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (H8QX

18 they're just un-documented rodents.
Posted by: USMC8541 at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (NmR1a)

19 The article describes these animals as "a kind of giant river rat."

"Hell, we've had them things in Loozyana for centuries, 'n' nobody ever' died."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (9xaT+)

20 Sort of looks like Henry Waxman.
Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (zSVEm)

21 Cheetos

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:46 PM (+F0Wk)

Finest minds thinking alike.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:47 PM (vkS2Z)

22 1 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria - their very name indicates they are nutritious.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:44 PM (vkS2Z)

Supposedly they taste like rabbit.
Posted by: Surfperch at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (J7NdS)

23 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

*

California health care at its finest.

Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (xqfqx)

24 "Nutria are about two and a half feet long with a twelve inch tail. Their whiskers are white and their hind feet webbed."

------

Aaaaahhhh!!!!
Rodents of Unusual Size
Kill it with fire!!!
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (hMwEB)

25 I can't stand its accusing stare. I cried.
Posted by: Morrissey at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (loZXu)

26 California : The Sound of 30 Million Farts all at once.
Posted by: Hikaru at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (9TK8E)

27 State of decomposition
Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (XOEc2)

28 California could just change it's name to "State of Emergency."
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo

State of Paranoia
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (2ifxQ)

29 State of chaos.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (vkS2Z)

30 At least they don't vote.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

31 Would it be wrong if someone placed Nutria families in certain CA neighborhoods?
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (r9UYA)

32 >>Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

California requires Carrots in the Chili.
Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (o7yn2)

33 3 Weren't these suspected in the infamous Carter Rabbit Attack?
Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (AM1GF)

That rabbit's dynamite!
Posted by: Arthur, King of The Britons at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (7HtZB)

34 I am introducing emergency legislation to ensure that these nutria qualify for in-state tuition rates.
Posted by: CA State Legislator at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (ppBhU)

35 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

Like other rodents, they do not have enamel on their teeth and their teeth continually grow through their entire life span.
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (BF6Fv)

36 It's CA. I could give a rats ass.
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (EDSlc)

37 Nutrias at the Gates.. would make a fine movie..
Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (zSVEm)

38 Aaaaahhhh!!!!
Rodents of Unusual Size
Kill it with fire!!!
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM (hMwEB)

---------

I don't think they really exist
Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (+F0Wk)

39 30 At least they don't vote.
_______________

Oh no? Hahaha. We love your optimism and naivete'
Posted by: CA Dim Party at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (fqUgw)

40 30 At least they don't vote.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

Not yet.
Posted by: Random Hawaiian Judge #7 at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (7HtZB)

41 Nutrias are natural DemocRATS
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (hMwEB)

42 I seem to recall a flap about 30 years ago when a suburban parish's deputies were entertaining themselves, and cleaning up the neighborhood, by shooting the nutria running around the open drainage canals. (Yes, Virginia, Noo Awlins' suburbs have open drainage canals all over. There are occasional fences, but it's still possible on a dark rainy night to drive into the canal and drown.)

But of course, CA's officials won't do that.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (9xaT+)

43 Don't those things cause cancer?
Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (RD7QR)

44
No Nutria is Illegal!
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (r+sAi)

45 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius

Gnawing trees/bark/tannins.
They gnaw to keep their teeth filed down.
Teeth are always growing.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (2ifxQ)

46 That rabbit's dynamite!

Posted by: Arthur, King of The Britons at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

Look at all the bones!
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (EDSlc)

47 >> at least they don't vote

Why not? It's very difficult for them to get IDs.
Posted by: Dems at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (XOEc2)

48 Drop dry ice down their holes!
Posted by: Kaiser Wilhelm at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (+y/Ru)

49 30 At least they don't vote.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

ANIMALS ARE PEOPLE TOO!!!!! THEY DESERVE A RIGHT TO VOTE!!!!!
Posted by: PETA at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (J7NdS)

50 I thought nutria was one of those super foods vegans like to eat.
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (nBr1j)

51 Just to follow up on post of person shot in Walmart. It's not as simple as what was posted. You can google John Crawford III to get the full story.
Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (s9DTK)

52 They could always divert the Oroville Dam repair funds to help get rid of the rats.
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (r9UYA)

53 I should think CA would want to arm it's citizens so that they can eradicate these evil ROUS's. Yeah. Lots of guns. That's the ticket.

Or, they could just open a Planned Nutria Parenthood in the neighborhood. That seems to be fairly efficient at killing off undesirables.
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (7UW64)

54 At least they don't vote.

Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)
**
I tried for years to get the little rats on the voter roles! Stupid bastards couldn't sign their names!

Posted by: Barbara Boxer at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (xqfqx)

55 Just wait... someone in Coleforrnia will start self identifying as a nutria...
Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (zSVEm)

56 Mmmmmm. Bet that would be tasty with a tarantula on top.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (o2MD2)

57 How big are they?
Posted by: Richard Gere at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (djCea)

58 I don't think they really exist

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 12:50 PM (+F0Wk)

That's what the Fire Swamp WANTS you to think.
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (hMwEB)

59 The article describes these animals as "a kind of giant river rat."

"Hell, we've had them things in Loozyana for centuries, 'n' nobody ever' died."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius

State used to pay $5 a tail.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (2ifxQ)

60 Have they tried Acme products?
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (+y/Ru)

61 Nutria is lLatin for 'Shadow Varmint'.
Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (gDv6

62 IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE THEY REFUSE TO DEPLOY THEIR NATIONAL GUARD TO THE BORDER.
Posted by: BEN ROETHLISBERGER at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (W+vEI)

63 Nutrias at the Gates.. would make a fine movie..

Posted by: kraken at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

Nutrinado!!!!
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (EDSlc)

64 #NutriaLivesMatter
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (MDlMP)

65 Looks like beaver to me.
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

66 35 5 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

Like other rodents, they do not have enamel on their teeth and their teeth continually grow through their entire life span.
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018
*
*
So when they grow some more, they'll come out a different color? How about blue?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (9xaT+)

67
Full of nutrients and beta kerosenes!
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (VM6ev)

68 And here I thought that it would be an article on how the invasive species Illegalus Mexicanus was impacting the local San Francisco fauna Homo Sexualus.
Posted by: Anonymous White Male at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (9BLnV)

69 New Orleans has teams shoot them at night ... sounds fun.

The whole invasive species thing really is a lesson in "diversity". Many of the invaders (plants mostly) that take over and destroy lands were deliberately introduced for some good purpose ... then they wipe out everything.
Posted by: illiniwek at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (bT8Z4)

70 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (hMwEB)

71 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
______________

We recommended they use Ora-jet toothbrushes, but the handles kept slipping through their claws.
Posted by: American Dental Assoc. at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (fqUgw)

72 House the nutria with the illegals? House the illegals with the nutria? Do both?
Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (RD7QR)

73 65 Looks like beaver to me.
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

"Be like a beaver, and split!"

- - The California Nutria Marketing Board

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (VM6ev)

74 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria

Soylent Brown?

Posted by: pep at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM

Sorry, I read that as feed the homeless To the nutria.
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (EDSlc)

75 They don't sit still on the cast couch either.

Rat Bastards.

Posted by: Harvey Weinstein at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (xqfqx)

76
Supposedly our forebears nearly wiped out the beaver and the buffalo, but we can't have a Nutria Fur Coat industry?

Come on America, we know how to kill these things.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (r+sAi)

77 30 At least they don't vote.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (LiyEm)

Are you kidding?

The nutria and the delta smelt are two core Democrat constituencies.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (MDlMP)

78 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Not even close

You can trust me. I'm a professional.
Posted by: Peter North at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (fiGNd)

79 65 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Good heavens, man, how long has it been?
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (7UW64)

80 "16 Looks like Lisa Page.

Posted by: dananjcon"

Considering she looks like Joey Ramone's homely sister, she's got to bring something to the table to have a husband and bf simultaneously. However, I won't speculate what that is at this family friendly site. But tennis ball and garden hose come to mind.
Posted by: Benji Carver at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (OD2ni)

81 They're a type of weasel.
Posted by: Larsen E. Whipsnade at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (bML9A)

82 California needs to invest in green powered leaf blowers.
Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (2LelM)

83 CNN is super-excited because "Cohen is about to flip."
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (O7MnT)

84 Set up nutria tent-cities and shelters and hand out free food! Let them in the libraries---and Starbucks!--- to watch porn!
If you're super-nice to them, they won't chew your bridge down!
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (0jtPF)

85 From the interwebz: Nutria numbers in Louisiana are now estimated at 20 million. The state pays a bounty of $4 for every nutria tail and typically gets about 300,000 tails a year.

Opportunity for enterprising youngsters.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (vkS2Z)

86 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale

Dreamers. Even Speedy Gonzalez has dreams you privileged Caucasian!
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (EDSlc)

87 Trump hates Nutrias and wants to deport them. Save the Nutrias! Impnutria foddy-fi!
Posted by: mindful webworker says pftth at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (ATv6t)

88 Mebbe the California shitheads can give the Nutria free condoms so they will start to deplete, or maybe taxpayer paid abortions.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (o2MD2)

89 32 >>Why are the nutria's teeth orange?

California requires Carrots in the Chili.

Posted by: garrett at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

mic drop.
Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (0tfLf)

90 71 Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
______________

We recommended they use Ora-jet toothbrushes, but the handles kept slipping through their claws.
Posted by: American Dental Assoc. at April 19, 2018
*
*
My favorite comment yet.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (9xaT+)

91 In Alabama, the authorities imported alligators to cope with the beaver population.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (yQpMk)

92 79 65 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Good heavens, man, how long has it been?
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (7UW64)

The power of a missing article. (a)
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (nBr1j)

93 OH! EM! JEE! Teh Kyoot!!! It burns!

You know why CA has a housing crisis? I11egals. Well, without them, there'd be a lot less competition for housing, and no, they don't all live 2 dozen to a 1 BR.
Posted by: SFgoth at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (dZ756)

94 "It's a triple threat. It's public safety, it's the economy, it's the environment. If nutria get established in California, there's almost no hope of removing them. That's why we are acting so quickly."

The lack of self-awareness....
Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (W+vEI)

95 30 At least they don't vote.

Yet... We'll see about that
Posted by: T. Liu at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (hdFyL)

96 The whole invasive species thing really is a lesson in "diversity". Many of the invaders (plants mostly) that take over and destroy lands were deliberately introduced for some good purpose ... then they wipe out everything.
Posted by: illiniwek

Kudzu
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (2ifxQ)

97 Governor Jerry Brown announced he will deploy "up to 400 National Guard Troops" to do nothing. The crime rate in California is high enough, and the Federal Government will not be paying for Governor Brown's charade. We need border security and action, not words!

@RealDonaldTrump 1h

Not to mention yuge face eating rodents.
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (r9UYA)

98 79
65 Looks like beaver to me.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (nBr1j)

Good heavens, man, how long has it been?

Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (7UW64)

For some of us too long.
Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (gjGvH)

99 Doing the jobs that muskrats won't do!
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (w1zJX)

100 67
Full of nutrients and beta kerosenes!
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 12:52 PM (VM6ev)

When you shoot them they make a sound like a dog...woof!!!
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (BF6Fv)

101 Aaaaahhhh!!!!

Rodents of Unusual Size

Kill it with fire!!!

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:48 PM

I don't believe they exist.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Westley at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (p+Wdc)

102
Why are the nutria's teeth orange?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:45 PM (9xaT+)

They're protesting Trump's tough stand on illegal immigration. They'd wear pussy hats but they haven' t figured out how to put them on their heads yet.
Posted by: Solyndra at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (lKyWE)

103 34 I am introducing emergency legislation to ensure that these nutria qualify for in-state tuition rates.
Posted by: CA State Legislator at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM (ppBhU)

In-state? Previous waves of illegal aliens get FREE tuition.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (MDlMP)

104 57 How big are they?
Posted by: Richard Gere at April 19, 2018 12:51 PM (djCea)

Small enough for you, no worries.
Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (RD7QR)

105 Nutria? Isn't that something you spread on toast?
Posted by: SFgoth at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (dZ756)

106 Sigh. More wetbacks.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (MDlMP)

107 Considering she looks like Joey Ramone's homely sister, she's got to bring something to the table to have a husband and bf simultaneously. However, I won't speculate what that is at this family friendly site. But tennis ball and garden hose come to mind.
========

All deliveries in the rear.
Posted by: Lisa P. at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (vg8iE)

108 I remember a mean chat sometimes used when I was in elementary school "fat, fat water rat."
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (nBr1j)

109 In Alabama, the authorities imported alligators to cope with the beaver population.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 12:55 PM (yQpMk)

If only they'd just quit slaughtering them every fall ...
Posted by: Peter North at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (fiGNd)

110 70 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (hMwEB)

They were "introduced" into California in the 1890's!
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (vkS2Z)

111 Like other rodents, they do not have enamel on their teeth and their teeth continually grow through their entire life span.
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 12:49 PM

But we'll put fluoride in the water, because.
Posted by: California State Bureau of Nutria Dental Care at April 19, 2018 12:56 PM (ctuyM)

112 #NutriaToo
Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (xqfqx)

113 Kudzu
Posted by: rickb223
------------

The introduction of Kudzu was a government project.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (5OO3x)

114 I told you about this shit, and everybody laughed at me!
Posted by: Jimmy Carter at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (MDlMP)

115 Speaking of invasive rats:

Cuomo on the history of Italian immigrants facing discrimination: "You want to deport immigrants start with me, because I'm an undocumented person."

Dude, you've convinced me. Get on the boat!
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (+y/Ru)

116 Perchance were you a student at Sunny Terrace? I remember that one as well.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (vkS2Z)

117 "It's a triple threat. It's public safety, it's the economy, it's the environment. If nutria get established in California, there's almost no hope of removing them. That's why we are acting so quickly."

Triple threat identified! Unlike what's coming across our Southern border that endangers public safety, economy, and the environment.

What until these big rats get driver's licenses!

Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (oiNtH)

118 $5 for tail
Looks like beaver

Krakatoa is right, the jokes write themselves.
Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (0tfLf)

119 Is there a hunting season for Nutria in Kalifornia?
Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (gjGvH)

120 As I recall, nutria don't really look much like rats. They're a little cuter -- more like groundhogs.

"Not bad for a quadruped."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (9xaT+)

121 Off Porn Legend sock !!!
Posted by: ScoggDog at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (fiGNd)

122 Nutria are natural Republicans. We should welcome them
Posted by: Ripley at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (MxEKc)

123 I would pay to see Jerry Brown ass porked by a nutria.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (o2MD2)

124 76
Supposedly our forebears nearly wiped out the beaver and the buffalo, but we can't have a Nutria Fur Coat industry?

Come on America, we know how to kill these things.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 12:53 PM (r+sAi)
-------------------------------
Nutria fur is very soft and nice.
Honestly, if it weren't for the PETA crowd, the problem really would take care of itself.
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (0jtPF)

125 A team of biologists has been trained to trap the nutria. And it can difficult to tell the difference between nutria and non-threatening animals like beavers, otters and muskrats

"It's tricky to identify them. We have wildlife biologists, PhDs out there trying to understand and identify them. It's been challenging," said Tira.

PhDs, man. P ... h ... Ds!!
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (7ieWW)

126 The introduction of Kudzu was a government project.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (5OO3x)

We're from the government, and we're here to help.
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (7UW64)

127 They are amphibious whistle pigs.
Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (2LelM)

128 Also from interwebz: The critters were first introduced from South America to this country in 1899 in California.

California has a lot to answer for.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (vkS2Z)

129 Upskirt shot of Lena Dunham?
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (nBr1j)

130
Vox
@voxdotcom
The Parkland students are leading a master class in how to deal with bullies.

Well, you can't say they don't need it.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (+y/Ru)

131 From the article:

"Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (oMtOd)

132 Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:57 PM (+y/Ru)

Why do politicians make these stupid statements?. You were born here, Cuomo. You father was born here. I expect the relatives you had from Italy came here legally through Ellis Island.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (tpDAe)

133 There was an article somewhere about the problem with these critters in Louisiana. Apparently they were brought in decades ago as a source for furs, which would provide income to them there deplorable folks who live in the swamp. The fur industry has collapsed, thanks to progs, and the Nutria are a-swarmin'. They apparently taste OK, and there's some effort to make them part of N'Orleans cookin', according to this article - which I can't find now. But trust me....
Posted by: George V at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (LUHWu)

134 The whole invasive species thing really is a lesson in "diversity". Many of the invaders (plants mostly) that take over and destroy lands were deliberately introduced for some good purpose ... then they wipe out everything.
_____________________

Raaaaaaaaaacist h8ter!!!

Everybody knows that diversity is an unquestioned, and unquestionable, good!

And if you don't agree, we will keeeeeeeeeel you!

Posted by: CAIR at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (fqUgw)

135 #LetThemVote
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (oVJmc)

136
"Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.

Their teeth are fast as lightning!

ICE spokesfolks, clutching their sides from laughter, could not summon a comment.
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (pNxlR)

137 From the interwebz: Nutria numbers in Louisiana are now estimated at 20 million. The state pays a bounty of $4 for every nutria tail and typically gets about 300,000 tails a year.

Opportunity for enterprising youngsters.
Posted by: kathysaysso at April 19, 2018 12:54 PM (vkS2Z)

I read there was a similar program for rats in Vietnam a while back. It got cancelled when officials noticed tailless rats running around the city. The people were taking the tails, but leaving the rats to breed so the gravy train could continue.
Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (+F0Wk)

138 130
Vox
@voxdotcom
The Parkland students are leading a master class in how to deal with bullies.

Well, you can't say they don't need it.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (+y/Ru)

How mentally torture a kid and make him grab a rifle?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (VM6ev)

139
Supposedly they taste like rabbit

+++

Which in turn tastes like chicken
Posted by: Bigbys Cellphone at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (/JlMC)

140 $5. Same as in town.
Posted by: Just the Punchline at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (yQpMk)

141 "Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell

Once they drop a litter, they can go to pound town again in 48 hours.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (2ifxQ)

142 There goes the neighborhood.
Posted by: Sewer Rat at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (djCea)

143 The cool job is riding in the back of a pickup through New Orleans at 0200 shooting nutria with a scoped/silenced rifle. This is probably the only honest work the NOPD does.
Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (2LelM)

144 129
Upskirt shot of Lena Dunham?

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (nBr1j)

God, I need mind bleach for what I just imagined.
Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (gjGvH)

145 It looks like Adam Schiff is gonna take Trump's pardon pen away from him.
Posted by: Bill W at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (Z4UvQ)

146 Nutria fur is very soft and nice.
Honestly, if it weren't for the PETA crowd, the problem really would take care of itself.
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 12:58 PM (0jtPF)
----------

Isn't that why they were brought here in the first place? I thought there were nutria farms for that very purpose.

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (oMtOd)

147 "It's a triple threat. It's public safety, it's the economy, it's the environment. If nutria get established in California, there's almost no hope of removing them."

I said the same thing about liberals from the Northeast and upper Midwest 40 years ago, and yet here we are.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (MDlMP)

148
Wait! Wait! Jerry's dealt with this sort of thing before!

Spray infested areas with Paraquat!
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (pNxlR)

149 "Louisiana has also battled a much larger nutria invasion. But as to how the rodents ended up in California, nobody is quite sure."

Well, lets see...what happened in Louisiana a few years ago that caused a huge shift in population where the government relocated a bunch of people and what was left of their belongings to other states, like California.
Hmmmm....
Let me think.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (0tfLf)

150 I would like to see property taxes increased 10 percent statewide to fight this rodent scourge. No, make it 15 percent.
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (r9UYA)

151 Around here, I mostly have to deal with moose in the yard, on the street, and in the school yard. We have one very naughty young bull that hangs around the house and causes any amount of havoc.

A couple of weeks ago the boy was down the street at a friend's house, and called to say he was going to be late because he couldn't walk home past the moose. So, DH got in the truck and drove three houses down to pick him up.

This is the same bull who stripped the apples off my sweet apple tree, drooled all over the deck, and then broke off branches because he couldn't get to the ones higher up.

If I didn't live in town, he would be happily residing on my freezer by now.
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (7UW64)

152 "Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.
========

Peter Tira-Puffer
Posted by: bicentennialguy at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (vg8iE)

153 I declare Mexicans an invasive species. Brown needs to Fight invasion by killing his dumbass self/
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (o2MD2)

154
I saw Invasive Species open for Three Dog Night at the Spectrum.
Posted by: Forgot My Nic at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (LOgQ4)

155

Nutriasweet
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (IqV8l)

156 Once they drop a litter, they can go to pound town again in 48 hours.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (2ifxQ)

Nutria can do that too.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (MDlMP)

157
"It's tricky to identify them. We have wildlife biologists, PhDs out there trying to understand and identify them. It's been challenging," said Tira.

Men don't need a fancy shmancy degree to tell you that chasing beaver is time consuming and expensive
Posted by: Solyndra at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (lKyWE)

158 I imagine they taste at least as good as opossum.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (yQpMk)

159
You have to give California credit - their diet is enriched in irony.
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (pNxlR)

160 >>What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Sounds more like Tribbles.

Are these wicked-smaat PhDs who can't tell the difference between a Nutria and a beaver sure these aren't Tribbles?
Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (W+vEI)

161 So is the problem that they might vote republican?
Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (h/uSM)

162 151 Around here, I mostly have to deal with moose in the yard, on the street, and in the school yard. We have one very naughty young bull that hangs around the house and causes any amount of havoc.

A couple of weeks ago the boy was down the street at a friend's house, and called to say he was going to be late because he couldn't walk home past the moose. So, DH got in the truck and drove three houses down to pick him up.

This is the same bull who stripped the apples off my sweet apple tree, drooled all over the deck, and then broke off branches because he couldn't get to the ones higher up.

If I didn't live in town, he would be happily residing on my freezer by now.
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 01:01 PM (7UW64)

Deer poop in the yard is the worst I have to deal--well that and deer choosing to randomly jump onto the highway.
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:02 PM (nBr1j)

163 I read there was a similar program for rats in Vietnam a while back. It got cancelled when officials noticed tailless rats running around the city. The people were taking the tails, but leaving the rats to breed so the gravy train could continue.
-------------------
Yep. That sounds like Asia.
Posted by: Gumby at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (2LelM)

164 "Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."
=======

What the fuck are they? Tribbles?
Posted by: bicentennialguy at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (vg8iE)

165 131 From the article:

"Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018
*
*
I suspect the "writer" meant something like "the nutria can get pregnant again within 48 hours after giving birth." You're right, the other way makes them sound like tribbles with legs.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (9xaT+)

166 Is there a hunting season for Nutria in Kalifornia?

What will you hunt with, a semi-auto in California?
Posted by: Leland at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (kB2km)

167 As part of the upcoming Harry and Meghan marital extravaganza, "Crown Jewels Heritage Condoms" are being made available, at the low, low price of 10 Pounds for a box of 4.

Described as being "fit for a prince", the box features a picture of the happy couple.

As the box is opened, the British and American national anthems ring out, presumably to induce standing at attention.
Posted by: Moron News YOU can use! at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (ctuyM)

168
Off swindling sock
Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (lKyWE)

169 125 A team of biologists has been trained to trap the nutria. And it can difficult to tell the difference between nutria and non-threatening animals like beavers, otters and muskrats

"It's tricky to identify them. We have wildlife biologists, PhDs out there trying to understand and identify them. It's been challenging," said Tira.

PhDs, man. P ... h ... Ds!!
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 19, 2018 12:59 PM (7ieWW)

So biologists can't tell the difference between beavers and otters? Really?
Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (7HtZB)

170 I have young relatives in Louisiana that have made a fair amount of money shooting nutrea.
Posted by: Moron Robbie - SJWs Destroyed My Garden Because I Grew Heritage Tomatoes at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (4EJjM)

171 I'm sure Nutria has already been served as General Tzo's chicken somewhere...
Posted by: BluesFish at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (KG+lL)

172 The solution will involve an obscene increase in taxes and painting river banks white.
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (nBr1j)

173 Notice how we hear endlessly about David Hogg, but no Nikolas Cruz has gone down the memory hole?

No info of his motivation, background, manifesto, or anything else.

I would think that the most important person to listen to from that killing would be the still-alive killer and not some opportunistic bystander.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oVJmc)

174 So what they're really saying is that they can get pregnant again 48 hours after giving birth?

Sloppy writing.

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oMtOd)

175 I believe Louisiana pays a bounty on nutria.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (o2MD2)

176 Well honestly, between the Nutria and Henry Waxman, the Nutria is a 10.
Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oiNtH)

177 This thread reminds me - what's new on the 3-legged doe that was hanging around Jane's house?
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (hMwEB)

178 Free food source for the homeless. I don't see a problem.
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (r9UYA)

179 There must be some way CA can tax them.
Posted by: wth at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (HgMAr)

180
Isn't that why they were brought here in the first place? I thought there were nutria farms for that very purpose.
___________________

There was a Seinfeld episode where Elaine went crazy with the Peterson's company credit card, and let George charge an expensive fur hat (Russian sable or something).

When the company accountant told her she had to account for all her spending, she replaced the hat with a cheap nutria-fur hat, but the accountant wasn't fooled and told her he could recognize a "rat hat" when he saw one.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (fqUgw)

181
... stripped the apples off my sweet apple tree, drooled all over the deck, and then broke off branches because he couldn't get to the ones higher up ...

I'll take "Drop-In Phrases for Any Mo-Mee Promotional Brochure" for $600, Alex!
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (pNxlR)

182 166
Is there a hunting season for Nutria in Kalifornia?

What will you hunt with, a semi-auto in California?

Posted by: Leland at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (kB2km)

Given it's Kalifornia, maybe slingshot or rocks and sticks.
Posted by: jim at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (gjGvH)

183 When will the nutria in the photo by the Democratic Party caucus chairman?
Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (nBr1j)

184 What they need to do is use a few nutria pelts to design some clothes, then pay a coupla Kardashians to model them on Instagram, and then - BOOM! - problem solved.
Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (W+vEI)

185 141 "Once full-sized, they can have litters within 48 hours after giving birth, having litters of a dozen or more."

What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

Posted by: bluebell

Once they drop a litter, they can go to pound town again in 48 hours.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM

So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (0tfLf)

186 Much as I dislike Carter - what he described sounded to me like a rabbit suffering from rabies.

I would have written "rabid rabbit" but that would have started an entirely noxious chain of posts.

Posted by: An Observation at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (QGEI2)

187
"Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.

Nutria in a Starbucks - now THAT would be frightening, fear-for-your-life frightening.
Posted by: Hands at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (EzdLW)

188 >>>It's tricky to identify them.

Picture IDs are racist.
Posted by: Progglodyte at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (djCea)

189 Stop the genocide!

We need programs for the Nutria-Americans!
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (MDlMP)

190 70 Ok ok all kidding aside

how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?

It's not like they can hide in trucks or something

---

OK - get this! Back in the day, people imported these gross bastards (on purpose!) to the US to be farmed for fur.

However, it turns out that fashionable ladies didn't want to wear swamp-rat fur, and the farms were not profitable. The farmers simply released them into the wild to prosper.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (AzW6q)

191 So what they're really saying is that they can get pregnant again 48 hours after giving birth?

Sloppy writing.

Posted by: bluebell

Yeah.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (2ifxQ)

192 180
Isn't that why they were brought here in the first place? I thought there were nutria farms for that very purpose.
___________________

There was a Seinfeld episode where Elaine went crazy with the Peterson's company credit card, and let George charge an expensive fur hat (Russian sable or something).

When the company accountant told her she had to account for all her spending, she replaced the hat with a cheap nutria-fur hat, but the accountant wasn't fooled and told her he could recognize a "rat hat" when he saw one.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 01:05 PM (fqUgw)

"And a poorly made one, even by rat-hat standards."
Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (7HtZB)

193 "It's tricky to identify them"
...

In California it is a violation of their civil rights to ask them their specific class of rodent.
Posted by: Tanner Boyle at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (2wOtx)

194
176 Well honestly, between the Nutria and Henry Waxman, the Nutria is a 10.
Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:04 PM (oiNtH)

Threadwinner! Shut 'er down!
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (pNxlR)

195 Eucalyptus trees in CA don't help either. They burn like a flame thrower.
Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (s9DTK)

196 Nutria have long skinny tails. Beavers have paddle tails, and otters are just as cute as they can be.

Where do I pick up my PHD?
Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (oiNtH)

197 145 It looks like Adam Schiff is gonna take Trump's pardon pen away from him.
Posted by: Bill W at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (Z4UvQ)
------------------------------
Is he going to sneak into the Oval Office tonight or what?!?

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (0jtPF)

198 187
"Would you call this frightening? I would call this frightening," said Peter Tira with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife.

Nutria in a Starbucks - now THAT would be frightening, fear-for-your-life frightening.
Posted by: Hands at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (EzdLW)

Give me a real fucking cup of coffee or the tatted up hipster barrista gets it!
Posted by: Nutria at Starbucks at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (RD7QR)

199 6 Maybe they can feed the homeless with Nutria

Soylent Brown?
Posted by: pep

Maybe feed the homeless to the Nutria.
Posted by: Dirks Strewn at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (kfcYC)

200 >>So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Pssst! Want some brown snakes for free?
Will, uh, take care of your problem real good!
Posted by: Guam at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (W+vEI)

201 186 Much as I dislike Carter - what he described sounded to me like a rabbit suffering from rabies.

I would have written "rabid rabbit" but that would have started an entirely noxious chain of posts.

Posted by: An Observation at April 19, 2018
*
*
Avenge me!!!
Posted by: General Woundwort at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (9xaT+)

202 Many were admitted to the Golden State to pad Hillary's election margin.
Posted by: regular joe at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (kb0cx)

203 Announce that Nutria eat marijuana plants and the problem would be solved overnight.
Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (r9UYA)

204 I binged Nutria predators and got:

bald eagles and hawks, cottonmouth snakes, garfish, dogs, turtles and alligators.

what's a garfish?
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (hMwEB)

205 This thread reminds me - what's new on the 3-legged doe that was hanging around Jane's house?

-

There is nothing new. Stop asking questions.
Posted by: Venison Sausage Co. at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (/czxp)

206 Nutria have long skinny tails. Beavers have paddle tails, and otters are just as cute as they can be.

Where do I pick up my PHD?
Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:07 PM (oiNtH)
---------

Sorry, you know the differences between the three, so you don't get the PhD.

But have a rat-hat as a consolation prize.
Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (oMtOd)

207

Giant rats in California are nothing new.

Oh, you mean outside Sacramento?
Posted by: BackwardsBoy likes lobster at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (GdWl+)

208 So biologists can't tell the difference between beavers and otters? Really?

Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2018 01:03 PM (7HtZB)

They got their degrees from Fresno State.
Posted by: tcn in AK at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (7UW64)

209 So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Posted by: Diogenes

Giant anaconda or giant boa. These things are bigger than a jack russell.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (2ifxQ)

210 Its almost like California does not understand the ramifications of Darwin...

Oh... wait... they don't... just look at how they ignore HUMAN Biology.
Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (NgKpN)

211 >>In California it is a violation of their civil rights to ask them their specific class of rodent.

"I identify as a possum!"
Posted by: Guam at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (W+vEI)

212 Nutria may not do as well in a free running river. Take down the dams! Free the Hetch Hetchy! For the children!
Posted by: 2009Refugee at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (Ke0ij)

213 Nutrasweet + Stevia = Nutria
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (oVJmc)

214 Uh oh. This just in: the nutria are gay.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (MDlMP)

215 Carter was attacked by a swamp rabbit IIRC. They are s big s jackrabbits, and have been known to be aggressive.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (o2MD2)

216
Earthquake NOW!!!
Posted by: Soothie at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (sw1f5)

217 They've got the Ph.D.'s on this to figure out how many genders of nutria there are.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (MDlMP)

218 209 So what's the natural predator for these?
I bet it's snakes. I'm like Indiana Jones. Gawd, I hate snakes.

Posted by: Diogenes

Giant anaconda or giant boa. These things are bigger than a jack russell.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (2ifxQ)

So we need.... Wolves... and Mountain Lions... and maybe Bears.... oh my...
Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (NgKpN)

219 I binged Nutria predators and got:

bald eagles and hawks, cottonmouth snakes, garfish, dogs, turtles and alligators.

what's a garfish?
Posted by: @votermom

Bing alligator gar.
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (2ifxQ)

220
What exactly does this mean? The way it reads to me is that they can have a litter of babies every 48 hours, but that can't possibly be true, can it?

I think they are referring to being able to get knocked up again in 48 hours. No mammal has a gestational period that short.
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (pNxlR)

221 If they are like whistle pigs, watch out. Whistle Pigs drag off their dead like the VC, usually to consume them later.
Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (BF6Fv)

222 204 I binged Nutria predators and got:

bald eagles and hawks, cottonmouth snakes, garfish, dogs, turtles and alligators.

---

If you binged on all that, I'd purge, immediately.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (AzW6q)

223 59 The article describes these animals as "a kind of giant river rat."

"Hell, we've had them things in Loozyana for centuries, 'n' nobody ever' died."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius

State used to pay $5 a tail.
Posted by: rickb223

I get almost twice that at truckstops.
Posted by: Stormy Daniels at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (kfcYC)

224 STOP ANTI-RODENTISM
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (oVJmc)

225 when exactly did they escape from the fire swamp?
Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (h/uSM)

226 Carter was attacked by a swamp rabbit IIRC. They are s big s jackrabbits, and have been known to be aggressive.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:09 PM (o2MD2)
---------

Little known fact: they modeled the Easter bunny suit worn at the White House Easter Egg roll after Carter's attack rabbit.

(Did you see the photos of that thing? Hilarious.)
Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (oMtOd)

227 what's a garfish?
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (hMwEB)
---------------------------
I think he's pitching for the Cubs now.
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (0jtPF)

228 214 Uh oh. This just in: the nutria are gay.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM (MDlMP)

No, we're actually pretty pissed off!
Posted by: Nutria at Starbucks at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (RD7QR)

229
OK - get this! Back in the day, people imported these gross bastards (on purpose!) to the US to be farmed for fur.
However, it turns out that fashionable ladies didn't want to wear swamp-rat fur, and the farms were not profitable. The farmers simply released them into the wild to prosper.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (AzW6q)

The iconic palm trees in Southern California were originally brought here and planted as a source of cheap lumber but they were the wrong type of palm for that.
Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (lKyWE)

230 Carp, sea lampreys and zebra mussels are taking over the Great Lakes. How come it's alway things that are not useful.

Oh and pythons in FL.
Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 01:10 PM (s9DTK)

Liberals and CA.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:14 PM (MDlMP)

I beg to differ, Sir.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (yQpMk)

294 #249 for Thread Winner!

Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (Zsmh3)

295
ask Louisiana how they handle their nutria problem

Told hunters they were 1) delicious in etuoffee and 2) a protected species.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (BWL+E)

296 The Italicans took over the entire thread!

Posted by: Surfperch at April 19, 2018 01:19 PM (J7NdS)

297
Would it be wrong if someone placed Nutria families in certain CA neighborhoods?

Back when my Dad was alive and their house was plagued by raccoons, he'd live trap 'em and then haul them up the road a piece for release. The release location invariably was on the grounds of the nearby Native American reservation and, as he opened the cage and pounded on the back end to encourage Li'l Rocky to run away, Dad would say, "There, go visit your brudders!"

I LOLed

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:19 PM (pNxlR)

298 Uh-oh.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:19 PM (oVJmc)

299 One wonders if the Nutria were some illegal alien's "pets" that escaped.

Posted by: Curmudgeon at April 19, 2018 01:19 PM (ujg0T)

300 For shits and giggles, Trump ought to have the feds step in and declare the nutria and endangered species.

Posted by: Bear with Assymetrical Balls at April 19, 2018 01:19 PM (untxK)

301 48 hours between giving birth and fertility

Sexual maturity in about 3-4 months

130 gestation period

Up to 13 offspring per litter

I'm sensing a moneymaking opportunity....
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (eXA4G)

Nutria! They're Nutricious!

Get your NutriaBurger Now! They've got Electrolytes!

Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2018 01:19 PM (NgKpN)

302 Let's just nuke California from orbit, it's the only way to be sure.

Posted by: Ripley at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (AkTSb)

303 Oh Grump. You too?

In there with Jay. Go!

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (oMtOd)

304 Once is an accident

Twice is sabotage

duct-tape Grumpy's hands THEN throw him in the Barrel

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (hMwEB)

305
Room for one more down here, Grump

Posted by: The Barrel at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (EzdLW)

306 Yeah but, I bravely fought it off with just a paddle!

Posted by: Jimmuh at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (djCea)

307 295 #249 for Thread Winner!
Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (Zsmh3)

Well it is the entire thread.

Posted by: Surfperch at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (J7NdS)

308 Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (yQpMk)

Hey, that's MY schtick!

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (MDlMP)

309 $5 a tail

48 hours between giving birth and fertility

Sexual maturity in about 3-4 months

130 gestation period

Up to 13 offspring per litter

I'm sensing a moneymaking opportunity....

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (eXA4G)

You'd fit in quite well in Ankh-Morpork.

Posted by: Grey Fox at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (bZ7mE)

310 This thread seems to be reproducing quite quickly as well.

Posted by: irright at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (pMGkg)

311 Funny.... Colorado has had a Prairie Dog problem forever...

Interestingly, during WWII, the population of prairie dogs dropped dramatically near the airfields that were built to train the Air Corps. It turned out that the noise of the propellers hit a certain pitch that killed a lot of them and drove the remaining ones off.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (0tfLf)

312 It's LSD Flashback Day here at AoSHQ.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:21 PM (oVJmc)

313 303 Let's just nuke California from orbit, it's the only way to be sure.
Posted by: Ripley at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (AkTSb)

They'll probably mutate and grow even larger.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:21 PM (MDlMP)

314 Let's just nuke California from orbit, it's the only way to be sure.

Let me point out that California represents a substantial monetary investment by the government.

Posted by: Carter Burke at April 19, 2018 01:21 PM (yQpMk)

315
That's easy. They're ALL nutria. They're also apparently thought to be conservative, otherwise CA would be encouraging them to come here.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (MDlMP)

No. Check your AoS Style Guide. They're all some variety of weasel.

It's like I don't know you fuckers any more.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 19, 2018 01:21 PM (eXA4G)

316 I think I finally understand what leads to a barrelling.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:21 PM (nBr1j)

317
295 #249 for Thread Winner!
Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (Zsmh3)

Well it is the entire thread.
Posted by: Surfperch at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM

Everyone's a winner!

Posted by: The Barrel at April 19, 2018 01:21 PM (EzdLW)

318 I beg to differ, Sir.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (yQpMk)

Oh.... my....

Points to the Barrel...

Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2018 01:21 PM (NgKpN)

319 Posted by: Grump928(C)

And Grump copies the entire thread for the reply. LOL.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:21 PM (2ifxQ)

320 We have nutria in WA state. Our Armenian friend says they make the best barbecue. Maybe they need to import more Aremenians?

Posted by: notsothoreau at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (5HBd1)

321 311 This thread seems to be reproducing quite quickly as well.
Posted by: irright at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM (pMGkg)

I'll be back in 48 hours.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (MDlMP)

322 Give them Cali Driver's Licenses and enroll the kids in school.

Posted by: JAS at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (sCN2W)

323 Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM

aaaaaaaaahahahahah

AAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Posted by: bonhomme at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (iv0p7)

324 This is the perfect time for a remake of "Night of the Lepus"!

Posted by: Hack Hollywood producer at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (YW6Pd)

325 I'm sensing a moneymaking opportunity....

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 19, 2018 01:17 PM (eXA4G)

You'd fit in quite well in Ankh-Morpork.

Posted by: Grey Fox at April 19, 2018 01:20 PM
Nutria inna bun?

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (p+Wdc)

326 Hell, send a fucking bus down to get them some more. I will contribute to the diesel kitty.

Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (o2MD2)

327 We're wasting all Pixy's screen ink, you realize.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (oVJmc)

328 Let me point out that California represents a substantial monetary investment by the government.

Posted by: Carter Burke at April 19, 2018 01:21 PM (yQpMk)
========

They can bill me!

Posted by: E. Ripley at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (vg8iE)

329 Now if they can just figure out a way to get nutria to pull HIGH. SPEED. RAIL. trains, then they've really got something.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:23 PM (MDlMP)

330 Nuuutria the two of us need look no more
We both found what we were look for
With a friend to call my own I'll never be alone
And you my friend will see you've got a friend in me

Nuuutria you're always running here and there
You feel you're not wanted anywhere
If you ever look behind and don't like what you find
There's something you should know you've got a place to go....

Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:23 PM (oiNtH)

331 However, it turns out that fashionable ladies didn't want to wear swamp-rat fur, and the farms were not profitable. The farmers simply released them into the wild to prosper.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 19, 2018 01:06 PM (AzW6q)
------------------------
No. It was the anti-fur crusade that killed the business.
Nutria fur was very popular, especially the soft, smooth undercoat. And it wasn't all that cheap either.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:23 PM (0jtPF)

332 Those teeth look like a very particular shade of orange.

Comey Orange, I think.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, AKA VA GOP Sucks at April 19, 2018 01:23 PM (tVWQB)

333 How much does a nutria charge to do my lawn?

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:23 PM (oVJmc)

334 Don't even THINK of blaming Pixy.

Posted by: JAS at April 19, 2018 01:24 PM (sCN2W)

335 An attack rabbit is really hard to picture.
Posted by: washrivergal at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (Kcf2u)

Silflay hraka, lady.

Posted by: Bigwig from Watership Down at April 19, 2018 01:24 PM (qUD5Q)

336 test

Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:24 PM (r9UYA)

337 BTW: IIRC, it was the eucalyptus that were imported here, to use to make railroad ties.... but they brought the wrong kind over. never heard about palm trees being grown for lumber here.

Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:24 PM (Zsmh3)

338 No. It was the anti-fur crusade that killed the business.
Nutria fur was very popular, especially the soft, smooth undercoat. And it wasn't all that cheap either.
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:23 PM (0jtPF)

Certain of the GOPe could get by with just a nutria scrotum for a hat.

Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:24 PM (o2MD2)

339 We're wasting all Pixy's screen ink, you realize.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles

Ace had another can on the shelf. Oh...

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:24 PM (2ifxQ)

340
Can PDT declare California a sanctuary state for Nutria? All other states deport their Nutria westward.

Posted by: Hands at April 19, 2018 01:24 PM (EzdLW)

341 I think David Thoreau ate a Nutria and wrote about it. That particular passage was boring, really boring.

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:25 PM (nBr1j)

342 331 Nuuutria the two of us need look no more
We both found what we were look for
With a friend to call my own I'll never be alone
And you my friend will see you've got a friend in me

Nuuutria you're always running here and there
You feel you're not wanted anywhere
If you ever look behind and don't like what you find
There's something you should know you've got a place to go....

Posted by: Cheri at April 19, 2018 01:23 PM

Hey...hold on just a damned minute!

Posted by: Ben at April 19, 2018 01:25 PM (0tfLf)

343 Check your AoS Style Guide. They're all some variety of weasel.

=====

Canadian Geese are a variety of weasel.

Posted by: mustbequantum at April 19, 2018 01:25 PM (MIKMs)

344 the noise of the propellers hit a certain pitch that killed a lot of them

So Mars Attacks was loosely based on a true story?

Posted by: bonhomme at April 19, 2018 01:25 PM (iv0p7)

345
We're wasting all Pixy's screen ink, you realize.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles

We can always replace it with Disqus. *deep evil laugh*

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at April 19, 2018 01:25 PM (BWL+E)

346 Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (yQpMk)

I LOL as I was scrolling to see who did this .

Awesome.

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 01:25 PM (s9DTK)

347 An attack rabbit is really hard to picture.
Posted by: washrivergal at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (Kcf2u)

----------

Not as hard as you think, lassie!

Posted by: Tim the Enchanter at April 19, 2018 01:25 PM (+F0Wk)

348
Nutria! They're Nutricious!

Get your NutriaBurger Now! They've got Electrolytes!
Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2018 01:19 PM (NgKpN)

You'd be surprised how fucking tasty a ratburger can be....

*BZZZZZT*

- You are fined one credit for a violation of the Verbal Morality Statute. -

Posted by: John Spartan at April 19, 2018 01:26 PM (eXA4G)

349 I have a theory. Call me crazy.

People talk about Texas turning blue one day. I think California will one day turn red again. It may be ten years in the future, but the Democrats have screwed the state over so badly, eventually voters will look to the alternate.

They have the highest tax rate in the nation, and what do they get for their money? Highest poverty rate in the country. Worst public education in the country. Home prices that are out of reach to the middle class. Ridiculous environmental regulations that place a burden on business and quality of life.

Posted by: Mike, but not THAT Mike at April 19, 2018 01:26 PM (swJ7s)

350 Canadian Geese are a variety of weasel.

Posted by: mustbequantum

Canadian geese are the spawn of Satan.

Kill them all.

Posted by: Bozo Conservative....living on the prison planet at April 19, 2018 01:26 PM (vcOmj)

351 That rabbit's dynamite!

Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:26 PM (yQpMk)

352 Interestingly, during WWII, the population of prairie dogs dropped dramatically near the airfields that were built to train the Air Corps. It turned out that the noise of the propellers hit a certain pitch that killed a lot of them and drove the remaining ones off.

D'aaaahhhhh.... that's not it. What da ya think was in dah burgers!

Posted by: Barth at April 19, 2018 01:26 PM (+JEb3)

353 And they dont have a decent fun to fight with...

Posted by: Marcus T, Evil Wall Street Rooster at April 19, 2018 01:26 PM (MCEwl)

354 Maybe they need to import more Aremenians?

Posted by: notsothoreau at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (5HBd1)
---
there is no shortage of Armenians here in #Failifornia.

in fact, i believe you have to go to the source to find larger numbers than what we have.

Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:26 PM (Zsmh3)

355 What No Nutria love?

Posted by: The Captain and that chick at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (s9DTK)

356 make some hats and sell them in battery park

Posted by: concrete girl at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (zr8oO)

357 Would the barrel be large enough if all of us copied and pasted it?

Can Ace make a barrel he can't fill?

Posted by: Northernlurker but call me Teem. at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (nBr1j)

358
They have the highest tax rate in the nation, and what do they get for their money? Highest poverty rate in the country. Worst public education in the country. Home prices that are out of reach to the middle class. Ridiculous environmental regulations that place a burden on business and quality of life.

They're Venezuelizing.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (oVJmc)

359 Highest poverty rate in the country. Worst public education in the country. Home prices that are out of reach to the middle class. Ridiculous environmental regulations that place a burden on business and quality of life.

Posted by: Mike, but not THAT Mike

--

You're being too hard on California. They have the SECOND worst public education in the country.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (7ZVPa)

360 People talk about Texas turning blue one day. I think California will one day turn red again. It may be ten years in the future, but the Democrats have screwed the state over so badly, eventually voters will look to the alternate.
=======

Bwahahahaha!

They marinate in the shit. They don't know any better. They think it's normal.

Posted by: bicentennialguy at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (vg8iE)

361 An attack rabbit is really hard to picture.
Posted by: washrivergal at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (Kcf2u)

----------

Not as hard as you think, lassie!
Posted by: Tim the Enchanter

Three is the number. The number is three.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (2ifxQ)

362 Hola!

#weareallCali-Mexicansnow

Posted by: Marcus T, Evil Wall Street Rooster at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (MCEwl)

363 So what are Jay and Grump gonna do?
Just sit in the muck and play checkers?
Or fight to the death over who gets the shovel?

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (0jtPF)

364 Haha! Have we banned ALL of the guns in California, yet?

Posted by: Fritz at April 19, 2018 01:28 PM (bJ0w+)

365 -
--

What No Nutria love?

Posted by: The Captain and that chick at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM
-------------------

Nutria Suzy, Nutria Sam...

Posted by: irright at April 19, 2018 01:28 PM (pMGkg)

366 How did the Nutria get into the California ecosystem?

Posted by: Monk at April 19, 2018 01:28 PM (pOqmx)

367 It's unlikely to happen, but just have Cal Fish and Wildlife declare a season for these fence-jumping ghetto beavers. Five dollars a pelt. The other illegals will make the canals a free-fire zone trying to get bounties. Then we start rounding them up and deporting them on weapons charges, and hunting without licenses or nutria stamps. Fuckers have been poaching my whole life, they wiped out the pheasant population in Kern County when I was a kid.

Posted by: Monty James at April 19, 2018 01:28 PM (gKOMX)

368 355 Maybe they need to import more Aremenians?

Posted by: notsothoreau at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (5HBd1)
---
there is no shortage of Armenians here in #Failifornia.

in fact, i believe you have to go to the source to find larger numbers than what we have.

Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:26 PM

Where is this exactly???

Posted by: Turkish Army at April 19, 2018 01:29 PM (0tfLf)

369 California. Hell with better weather.

Posted by: Marcus T, Evil Wall Street Rooster at April 19, 2018 01:29 PM (MCEwl)

370
But now, for the first time, the animal has been found west of Stockton in the heart of the Delta.

The giant rodent moving into new territory and creating concerns for state officials.

Heading for Silicon Valley?

Posted by: Hands at April 19, 2018 01:29 PM (EzdLW)

371 I beg to differ, Sir.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:18 PM (yQpMk)

THE ITALICS ARE ON MY SKIN!!!!

Posted by: Jerry "kinda Garcia" Brown at April 19, 2018 01:29 PM (RD7QR)

372 Do Nutria tails grow back because if they do I'm going to have a secret Nutria farm in LA.

Posted by: The Captain and that chick at April 19, 2018 01:29 PM (s9DTK)

373 You're being too hard on California. They have the SECOND worst public education in the country.
Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (7ZVPa)

Only second worse because they lie about their SAT results. I went to school for 8 years in California. Believe me, they are the worst. Broward County may be creeping up on them though.

Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:30 PM (o2MD2)

374 350 I have a theory. Call me crazy.

People talk about Texas turning blue one day. I think California will one day turn red again. It may be ten years in the future, but the Democrats have screwed the state over so badly, eventually voters will look to the alternate.

Posted by: Mike, but not THAT Mike at April 19, 2018 01:26 PM (swJ7s)

There's a reason we've been importing so many illegals and registering them to vote.

Posted by: The California State Government at April 19, 2018 01:30 PM (J7NdS)

375 368---Posted by: Monty James at April 19, 2018 01:28 PM (gKOMX)
--------------------
Now there's a plan!

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:30 PM (0jtPF)

376 This is the perfect time for a remake of "Night of the Lepus"!
Posted by: Hack Hollywood producer at April 19, 2018 01:22 PM (YW6Pd)

What's a lepu?

Posted by: Gary Johnson at April 19, 2018 01:30 PM (y87Qq)

377 So what are Jay and Grump gonna do?
Just sit in the muck and play checkers? Or fight to the death over who gets the shovel? Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (0jtPF)
=====

Stand at attention and pray not to faint.

Posted by: mustbequantum at April 19, 2018 01:30 PM (MIKMs)

378 " But as to how the rodents ended up in California, nobody is quite sure."

Yep, a total mystery.

Posted by: t-bird at April 19, 2018 01:30 PM (2z74n)

379 Senate panel will vote on bill to protect Mueller despite McConnell's opposition

-usatoday

Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:30 PM (r9UYA)

380
It looks like Adam Schiff is gonna take Trump's pardon pen away from him.

Posted by: Bill W at April 19, 2018 01:00 PM (Z4UvQ)

If you pull the arrow out of your skull, will it make a "schlork" noise?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at April 19, 2018 01:30 PM (efC8N)

381
Is there not some Cob that has the ability to go in and can the long thread posts?

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 01:30 PM (r+sAi)

382 what's a garfish?
Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:08 PM

In this context, one of seven species in the Lepisosteiformes (or Semionotiformes) Family. However, these should be called gars, not garfish or gar fish.

The garfish (or gar fish) is Belone belone, and lives in the North Atlantic.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (ctuyM)

383 Bale up all of your cash and ship it to Cali. No questions asked. They need it. It is the Right Thing to Do.

Posted by: Burger Chef at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (RuIsu)

384 I have a theory. Call me crazy.

People talk about Texas turning blue one day. I think California
will one day turn red again. It may be ten years in the future, but the
Democrats have screwed the state over so badly, eventually voters will
look to the alternate.

They have the highest tax rate in the nation, and what do they get
for their money? Highest poverty rate in the country. Worst public
education in the country. Home prices that are out of reach to the
middle class. Ridiculous environmental regulations that place a burden
on business and quality of life.

Posted by: Mike, but not THAT Mike at April 19, 2018 01:26 PM (swJ7s)
---
yer crazy: i've lived here all my life, and they just keep doubling down on dumb.

until the entire shit pile collapses, the coastal dumbasses will keep doing so. it's their religion, and they are all true believers.

Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (Zsmh3)

385 OK.
Mike is crazy.
But not THAT Mike.

Posted by: Turkish Army at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (0tfLf)

386 Our country was built by nutria.

Posted by: Millenius Douchenozzel at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (FLifI)

387 They have the highest tax rate in the nation, and what do they get for their money? Highest poverty rate in the country. Worst public education in the country. Home prices that are out of reach to the middle class. Ridiculous environmental regulations that place a burden on business and quality of life.
_____________

And illegal aliens have more rights and privileges, and more political power, than actual citizens.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (fqUgw)

388 *Undocumented dreamers

Posted by: TJ at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (WHc8D)

389 My stupid phone is now sucking down the juice like Hillary at an open bar.

I've tried a few things.

I uninstalled every app that I don't use regularly.
I updated every app I'm keeping.
I went into Settings > Battery and put it on battery saver mode.
I went into Settings > Battery and dis-allowed all apps from running in the background.
I rebooted the phone.

So far, it's not really helping. It's losing 10% per hour on standby and a phone call costs me like 30% of the battery.

Any suggestions?

I'm thinking I might have to pay someone to gut my phone and replace the battery.

Posted by: bonhomme at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (iv0p7)

390 Senate panel will vote on bill to protect Mueller despite McConnell's opposition
========

And what is an anagram of "vote," boys and girls and other assorted transgendered-species?

"Veto."

Posted by: bicentennialguy at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (vg8iE)

391 They're Venezuelizing.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (oVJmc)

I bet hungry Venezuelans wish they had an over population of Nutria.

Posted by: The Captain and that chick at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (s9DTK)

392 Is there not some Cob that has the ability to go in and can the long thread posts?
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 01:30 PM (r+sAi)
---------

I think they all can. I just don't think anyone is hanging around right now.

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (oMtOd)

393 Jesus, after this thread we're gonna have retire the hamsters and put nutria in the HQ's powerplant.

Posted by: Fritz at April 19, 2018 01:32 PM (bJ0w+)

394 Nutria are capable of destroying roads, levees and wetlands.

Doing the jobs beavers won't do.

Posted by: No Animal Is Invasive at April 19, 2018 01:32 PM (2z74n)

395 This is in the Bible, isnt it.

Posted by: Marcus T, Evil Wall Street Rooster at April 19, 2018 01:32 PM (MCEwl)

396 Do Nutria tails grow back because if they do I'm going to have a secret Nutria farm in LA.

Posted by: The Captain and that chick at April 19, 2018 01:29 PM

Not funny, dude.

Posted by: The Stone Crabs at April 19, 2018 01:32 PM (p+Wdc)

397 Jaws the movie is better than the book.Discuss.

Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 01:32 PM (LiyEm)

398 California is behind NY and IL in loss of capital. We're number three!!!!

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable and Profoundly Unserious at April 19, 2018 01:32 PM (pw+jk)

399 >>Senate panel will vote on bill to protect Mueller despite McConnell's opposition

The barrel is a cold dank place. They may have to cuddle to perserve body heat.

Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2018 01:33 PM (r9UYA)

400 Do they work below minimum wage? How are they at trimming grass?

Posted by: Marcus T, Evil Wall Street Rooster at April 19, 2018 01:33 PM (MCEwl)

401 Any suggestions?

I'm thinking I might have to pay someone to gut my phone and replace the battery.
Posted by: bonhomme at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (iv0p7)

Disable location services entirely.

If it helps, reenable it and then selectively disable it per-app until you find the culprit. If I leave the gasbuddy app location service on, the battery usage goes nuts. I have no idea why that one causes the problem, but enabling location only when it's active (i.e. not all the time) fixed it. It = a mystery.

Posted by: hogmartin at April 19, 2018 01:33 PM (y87Qq)

402 You're being too hard on California. They have the SECOND worst public education in the country.
Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2018 01:27 PM (7ZVPa)

Only second worse because they lie about their SAT results. I went to school for 8 years in California. Believe me, they are the worst.
Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2018 01:30 PM (o2MD2)

Que?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (MDlMP)

403 395 Nutria are capable of destroying roads, levees and wetlands.

Doing the jobs beavers won't do.

Posted by: No Animal Is Invasive at April 19, 2018 01:32 PM

And at only $5 a pop!

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (0tfLf)

404 I'm thinking I might have to pay someone to gut my phone and replace the battery.
Posted by: bonhomme at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (iv0p7)

let the battery go down to zero before recharging?

what kind of phone is it?

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (hMwEB)

405 Business idea. Grind them into diesel additive and call it Nutria Urea.

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (BF6Fv)

406 I for one welcome our new rodent overlords.

Posted by: dananjcon at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (xqfqx)

407 Steevy - I agree Jaws the movie was better. The book had too many subplots.

Posted by: Mike, but not THAT Mike at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (swJ7s)

408 It looks like Adam Schiff is gonna take Trump's pardon pen away from him.

Posted by: Bill W

Bwahahahahahahaha

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (2ifxQ)

409 Where is this exactly???

Posted by: Turkish Army at April 19, 2018 01:29 PM (0tfLf)
---
Glendale and North Hollywood in SoCal, and up around Fresburg in the Central Valley...

be careful though: this time they are armed and will shoot back.

Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (Zsmh3)

410
So far, it's not really helping. It's losing 10% per hour on standby and a phone call costs me like 30% of the battery.

Any suggestions?

I'm thinking I might have to pay someone to gut my phone and replace the battery.

Posted by: bonhomme

--

If it is a Samsung, throw it in the trash, but take the battery out first so it doesn't start a fire. Samsung are notorious for battery problems, and also for not standing up to their warranty.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (7ZVPa)

411 385--
Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (Zsmh3)
---------------------------
When the pile collapses, they will TRIPLE down.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (0jtPF)

412 dude, looks like nutria got into the barrel and gnawed

Posted by: Boulder t'hobo at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (/9QbJ)

413 How are they with BBQ sauce?

Posted by: Marcus T, Evil Wall Street Rooster at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (MCEwl)

414 place is covered in barrel slip. cobs?

Posted by: Boulder t'hobo at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (/9QbJ)

415
It looks like Adam Schiff is gonna take Trump's pardon pen away from him.

Posted by: Bill W

lol

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at April 19, 2018 01:35 PM (lKyWE)

416 INRE California:

I have/had family there. When Pete Wilson was governor, they hated anything to do with Republicans. When the state was moving ever Left in fits and starts, it was never far enough.

And even now, today, with the evidence of the dysfunction all around them...it is STILL not enough. Just one more lurch, one more program, one more freedom ceded or dollar sent in taxes, and all will be well.

It isn't turning red.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, AKA VA GOP Sucks at April 19, 2018 01:35 PM (PFy0L)

417

EM BARRELL FOADDY-FI!!!

Posted by: Maxine Waters' Hair at April 19, 2018 01:35 PM (mPeei)

418 Steevy - I agree Jaws the movie was better. The book had too many subplots.
Posted by: Mike, but not THAT Mike at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (swJ7s)

But the book had a sex scene.

Posted by: The Captain and that chick at April 19, 2018 01:35 PM (s9DTK)

419 How are they with BBQ sauce?

Ketchup based? Mustard based, or vinegar?

Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:36 PM (yQpMk)

420 Where is cousin Eddie? He usually eats these damn things.

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at April 19, 2018 01:36 PM (BF6Fv)

421 Disable location services entirely.

--

oh yeah.
I do this by default, forgot it's even a setting LOL

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:36 PM (hMwEB)

422 I always heard the McIlhenny family, of Tabasco fame, imported them to control hydrilla in the canals.

Posted by: Dave at Buffalo Roam at April 19, 2018 01:36 PM (wBZMq)

423 ted lieu will take care of it

Posted by: concrete girl at April 19, 2018 01:36 PM (zr8oO)

424 The book had too many subplots.
Posted by: Mike, but not THAT Mike at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM

If it's subplops you want, we've got you covered.

Posted by: The Sidewalks of San Francisco at April 19, 2018 01:36 PM (ctuyM)

425 And illegal aliens have more rights and privileges, and more political power, than actual citizens.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (fqUgw)

By far.

CA Dem politicos are too stupid to grasp that at some point Mexicans will achieve enough numbers to vote them out and vote for other Mexicans instead.

You'd think Rahm Emanuel's near miss would've been a wake-up call, but apparently not.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:36 PM (MDlMP)

426
how do rats that big get here all the way from South America?
It's not like they can hide in trucks or something

Nutria come to the US as an act of love, and they should be treated differently than species who illegally cross the border.

Posted by: Jeb! at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (EzdLW)

427 -
--

Steevy - I agree Jaws the movie was better. The book had too many subplots.

Posted by: Mike, but not THAT Mike at April 19, 2018 01:34 PM (swJ7s)

But the book had a sex scene.

Posted by: The Captain and that chick at April 19, 2018 01:35 PM

-------------------------

That's HAAAWT! Describe the sharks.

Posted by: Jabberjaw at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (pMGkg)

428 looks like Adam Schiff is gonna take Trump's pardon pen away from him.

Posted by: Bill W

--

"It is a proven fact that the constitution is over 100 years old and therefore Schiff is superior to it."

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (7ZVPa)

429 I'm from Louisiana and it just so happens that I was in CA about a year ago.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (1ISKN)

430 I think they all can. I just don't think anyone is hanging around right now.

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (oMtOd)
---
more likely they are watching and ROTFLTMFAO at it...

Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (Zsmh3)

431 I have no idea why that one causes the problem, but enabling location
only when it's active (i.e. not all the time) fixed it. It = a mystery.
=====

Always laugh because even for the most non-tech households, I'll bet my nickel that we spend more time updating and fixing tech than we do on yard, household, or any other type of maintenance.

Posted by: mustbequantum at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (MIKMs)

432 BTW. It would be a shame if someone shanked Larry Nasser several thousand times with a rusty infected piece of metal

Posted by: Marcus T, Evil Wall Street Rooster at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (MCEwl)

433 It was cold in the barrel...the kind of cold that grabs on and just won't let go. It seeps through even the best of twill and caresses the skin as it slowly works its way into the bones.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (0tfLf)

434 The problem with turning from blue to red is that a blue state, one in Dem control, usually has corrupted the entire electoral process already.

Even if all the voters vote red, the results will always be blue.

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (hMwEB)

435 If California is so bad, why are real estate prices so high?

Posted by: Brunnhilde at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (aW5/6)

436
This thread is Barrellicious!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:38 PM (w/exv)

437
I have to always keep my Samsung battery on the upper side of charged. Once it gets into the 30% or less zone it kills itself off within an hour.

I've adjusted everything I can think of. It wants that battery strong.

Posted by: Forgot My Nic at April 19, 2018 01:38 PM (LOgQ4)

438 Highest poverty rate in the country.

I was shocked to find out this is true.

Worst public
education in the country.

I don't think California has the worst K-12 in the country. Nevada, Mississippi, and New Mexico are worse.

Posted by: bonhomme at April 19, 2018 01:38 PM (iv0p7)

439 The Nutria in Louisiana have formed a caravan and are heading toward the California Border.

Us folks in Texas have formed an underground railroad and are helping the Nutria caravan move through our state peacefully and assisting them by handing out bottled water, food and free legal advice and representation, and information on how to apply for public benefits when they get to California.

We even have bumper stickers that say "Help a Nutria and Piss off a Kommiefornia Liberal"

Posted by: The Walking Dude at April 19, 2018 01:38 PM (cCxiu)

440 Maybe we should let the poor nutria gnaw on the Californians so their teeth don't grow through their brains.

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 01:39 PM (RD7QR)

441 Nutria gumbo, nutria burgers, nutria kebab, nutria tenders, nutria sausage......

Posted by: eleven at April 19, 2018 01:39 PM (+lOpA)

442 So now I know what is in that sugar substitute

Posted by: Marcus T, Evil Wall Street Rooster at April 19, 2018 01:39 PM (MCEwl)

443 I don't think California has the worst K-12 in the country. Nevada, Mississippi, and New Mexico are worse.

Posted by: bonhomme

--

Last time I checked, only Mississippi was worse.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2018 01:39 PM (7ZVPa)

444 436 If California is so bad, why are real estate prices so high?
Posted by: Brunnhilde at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (aW5/6)

It's a genuinely beautiful place (well, outside of the urban hellholes). It's just had the misfortune of being infested with Californians.

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 01:40 PM (RD7QR)

445 I've adjusted everything I can think of. It wants that battery strong.
Posted by: Forgot My Nic at April 19, 2018 01:38 PM

Ain't no battery strong enough

Posted by: Symbian at April 19, 2018 01:40 PM (ctuyM)

446 Sounds like an iPhone with their special "battery saving" OS. Half the performance and 3x the battery consumption you had when new.

Posted by: clutch cargo at April 19, 2018 01:40 PM (RHEDC)

447 One of the Armenians was teaching my stepson how to shoot. The Armenian turned to his dad and said "I teach him how to shoot Muslims" and laughed. Our friend's daughters seem pretty American, but they went back to the old country to find husbands. And the family members all work, so natural Republicans, right?

Posted by: notsothoreau at April 19, 2018 01:40 PM (5HBd1)

448 277 I strongly encourage the California to import alligators

How much cold can gators endure? Winters here can drop to 40 odd degrees by day, with overnight lows in the upper twenties, at worst.

But having them in the Delta region would be entertaining.

Posted by: Curmudgeon at April 19, 2018 01:40 PM (ujg0T)

449
old and busted: Tribbles
new hawtness: Nutria

Posted by: Harcourt Fenton Mudd at April 19, 2018 01:40 PM (EzdLW)

450 My stupid phone is now sucking down the juice like Hillary at an open bar.

And iPhone auto-delete pasted text because those take space.

Posted by: clutch cargo at April 19, 2018 01:41 PM (RHEDC)

451 why are real estate prices so high?

Lots of old people living in their 4 bedroom houses and not wanting to sell and buy something smaller because of property taxes on the new smaller house will be more than on the old big house.

Posted by: JAS at April 19, 2018 01:41 PM (sCN2W)

452 Glenn Reynolds did a piece about congressional oversight of presidential problems not necessarily being a bad idea.Driven by hatred of Trump we may get the ability to prevent future travesties like Obama and Clinton's pardons.

Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 01:41 PM (LiyEm)

453 417 INRE California:

I have/had family there. When Pete Wilson was governor, they hated anything to do with Republicans. When the state was moving ever Left in fits and starts, it was never far enough.

And even now, today, with the evidence of the dysfunction all around them...it is STILL not enough. Just one more lurch, one more program, one more freedom ceded or dollar sent in taxes, and all will be well.

It isn't turning red.
Posted by: WitchDoktor, AKA VA GOP Sucks at April 19, 2018 01:35 PM (PFy0L)

Sounds pretty Red to me.

Posted by: rickl at April 19, 2018 01:41 PM (xjiRE)

454 Ketchup based? Mustard based, or vinegar?

Posted by: Grump928(C) at April 19, 2018 01:36 PM (yQpMk)
---
Alabama White sauce...

Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:41 PM (Zsmh3)

455 If California is so bad, why are real estate prices so high?
Posted by: Brunnhilde at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (aW5/6)

Supply and demand. You don't build you don't have supply.

Posted by: The Captain and that chick at April 19, 2018 01:41 PM (s9DTK)

456 Isn't it about time for someone to paste the entire thread into a reply again? I feel like I'm on a Yahoo group.

Posted by: notsothoreau at April 19, 2018 01:41 PM (5HBd1)

457 Why do I have a feeling a broken hip is in her future.

The Hill:

Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor's shoulder injury is more severe than initially believed, the court's press office said Thursday.

Supreme Court spokeswoman Kathleen Arberg said in a statement to The Hill that Sotomayor, 63, will sit for arguments next week but curtail activities that require travel.

Posted by: WisRich at April 19, 2018 01:41 PM (G0vdT)

458 what kind of phone is it?

Samsung Galaxy S7. Android.

Thanks for the location services suggestion, I'll try that.

Posted by: bonhomme at April 19, 2018 01:42 PM (iv0p7)

459 457 Isn't it about time for someone to paste the entire thread into a reply again? I feel like I'm on a Yahoo group.

Posted by: notsothoreau at April 19, 2018 01:41 PM

Gonna get crowded in that barrel.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 19, 2018 01:42 PM (0tfLf)

460
The Nutria is too damn high.

*puts on white gloves*

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 01:42 PM (r+sAi)

461 It's just had the misfortune of being infested with Californians.
Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 01:40 PM (RD7QR)

No. Not Californians; people who LIVE in California. It's like saying Somalis are Minnesotans.

CA became infested with liberals, practically all of whom came from NY, NJ, MA, IL, and MN since about 1970. This comes up in group conversations occasionally, and it's rare to meet a liberal here who is not originally from one of those places.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:43 PM (MDlMP)

462
It's a genuinely beautiful place (well, outside of the urban hellholes). It's just had the misfortune of being infested with Californians.

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 01:40 PM (RD7QR)

As I've said numerous times here,California was a beautiful and fairly conservative state until all the rejects from the rest of the country started migrating here in the 1960's.

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at April 19, 2018 01:44 PM (lKyWE)

463 Now would be a good time to open a Korean BBQ joint in California.

Posted by: Fritz at April 19, 2018 01:44 PM (bJ0w+)

464
Sonia seems too fragile, she should retire.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2018 01:44 PM (r+sAi)

465 It's just had the misfortune of being infested with Californians.

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at April 19, 2018 01:40 PM (RD7QR)
---
the problem started with East Coast Assholes moving here because it was a great place to live. then the assholes voted to make it just like home, because they're assholes.

their kids grew up to be native born assholes, but, in fact they are just the progeny of an invasive species of assholes.

Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:44 PM (Zsmh3)

466 Why do I have a feeling a broken hip is in her future.

The Hill:

Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor's shoulder injury is more
severe than initially believed, the court's press office said Thursday.

Supreme Court spokeswoman Kathleen Arberg said in a statement to The
Hill that Sotomayor, 63, will sit for arguments next week but curtail
activities that require travel.

Posted by: WisRich at April 19, 2018 01:41 PM (G0vdT)

Fat bottomed girls you make the judicial world go round!

Posted by: Zombie Freddy Mercury at April 19, 2018 01:44 PM (QLvwG)

467
The state pays a bounty of $4 for every nutria tail and typically gets about 300,000 tails a year.

Man, even I never got that much tail in a year, and it was all free!

Posted by: Wilt Chamberlain at April 19, 2018 01:45 PM (EzdLW)

468
Here's the funny / scary part - as I was scrolling down Jay and Grump's posting faux pas, I was thinking, "Oh, please, PLEASE, let this not have been mine!"

Both times.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:45 PM (w/exv)

469 This comes up in group conversations occasionally, and it's rare to meet a liberal here who is not originally from one of those places.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:43 PM (MDlMP)
--------

That's true. My brothers are both married to native Californians, both of whom are conservative (and yes, female).

Posted by: bluebell at April 19, 2018 01:45 PM (oMtOd)

470 I have to always keep my Samsung battery on the upper side of charged. Once it gets into the 30% or less zone it kills itself off within an hour.

I've adjusted everything I can think of. It wants that battery strong.
Posted by: Forgot My Nic at April 19, 2018 01:38 PM (LOgQ4)
-------------

I've got an S3, and had trouble with the battery dying quickly, particularly when it got low. I bought a new battery (not OEM - the brand was Anker), and haven't had trouble with the battery since.

Posted by: No One of Consequence at April 19, 2018 01:46 PM (+F0Wk)

471 the problem started with East Coast Assholes moving here because it was a great place to live. then the assholes voted to make it just like home, because they're assholes.

their kids grew up to be native born assholes, but, in fact they are just the progeny of an invasive species of assholes.
Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:44 PM (Zsmh3)

This.

Drop the liberals; keep the nutria.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:46 PM (MDlMP)

472 As I've said numerous times here,California was a beautiful and fairly
conservative state until all the rejects from the rest of the country
started migrating here in the 1960's.
=====

If you're going to San Francisco . . . there are gentle people there.

Posted by: mustbequantum at April 19, 2018 01:46 PM (MIKMs)

473 With Trump in WH the left wing justices will hang on even if they are on life support.

Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2018 01:46 PM (LiyEm)

474 I'd think CA could get rid of them, certainly much easier than New Orleans. Swamps all around New Orleans and all the canals are like highways for nutria.

My neighbor just a week ago said river otters cleaned out his pond ... found the catfish on the banks, said they just ate the heads, which seemed odd to me, since most like the big fillets. But if hypothetically they showed up in my pond I'd probably do what most want to do ... shoot em all, before they eat every fish and move on.

hypothetically it would only take a minute as they bobbed up to see what was happening and were greeted with a bang. But no hypothetical bodies have floated up ... haven't seen any in the last couple days since my friend reported that.

Posted by: illiniwek at April 19, 2018 01:47 PM (bT8Z4)

475 433 BTW. It would be a shame if someone shanked Larry Nasser several thousand times with a rusty infected piece of metal

Posted by: Marcus T, Evil Wall Street Rooster at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (MCEwl)

I hope he goes into general population.

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:47 PM (hMwEB)

476 Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor's shoulder injury is more

severe than initially believed, the court's press office said Thursday.

Supreme Court spokeswoman Kathleen Arberg said in a statement to The

Hill that Sotomayor, 63, will sit for arguments next week but curtail

activities that require travel.

---

Huh. She's a lot younger than that old geezer Trump, isn't she?

Posted by: Moron Robbie : Did Comey's Attorney Have Any Other Clients? at April 19, 2018 01:47 PM (LV5XU)

477 Why do I have a feeling a broken hip is in her future.

Posted by: WisRich at April 19, 2018 01:41 PM (G0vdT)
---
personally, i'm rooting for a blood clot, because i'm not a very nice person when you piss me off.

Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:47 PM (Zsmh3)

478 Here's the funny / scary part - as I was scrolling down Jay and Grump's posting faux pas, I was thinking, "Oh, please, PLEASE, let this not have been mine!"

Both times.
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2018 01:45 PM (w/exv)

Imagine how I felt. I was horrified to find the first one was mine, and throwing a rope over a rafter thinking maybe somehow I'd done it again on the second one.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:48 PM (MDlMP)

479 CA like most all blue states are controlled by their large urban population. Red or Purple states that have the potential to go Blue is a result of the growth of their urban population.

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 01:48 PM (s9DTK)

480 We have wildlife biologists, PhDs out there trying to understand and identify them.

Well see, right there's your problem. As any computer engineer will tell you, biology isn't a real science. There's not enough arithmetic.

More of a "studies," really. Kids shouldn't be allowed to major in it.

A real PhD wouldn't take this assignment (and don't call it a "job") unless there was adequate grant funding to categorize all the asses in the world, and facilitate access to a database of all holes in the ground.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at April 19, 2018 01:48 PM (H5rtT)

481 How did Sotomayor fall over? Her center of gravity must be about a foot from the floor.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:49 PM (MDlMP)

482
Huh. She's a lot younger than that old geezer Trump, isn't she?

Posted by: Moron Robbie : Did Comey's Attorney Have Any Other Clients? at April 19, 2018 01:47 PM (LV5XU)

Being a wise latina really ages you

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at April 19, 2018 01:49 PM (lKyWE)

483 I'm thinking I might have to pay someone to gut my phone and replace the battery.

Posted by: bonhomme at April 19, 2018 01:31 PM (iv0p7)

Five minutes in the microwave will recharge it.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at April 19, 2018 01:49 PM (efC8N)

484
"It's tricky to identify them. We have wildlife biologists, PhDs out there trying to understand and identify them. It's been challenging," said Tira.

Pikers. I could identify them.

Posted by: Stormy's sketch artist at April 19, 2018 01:50 PM (EzdLW)

485 How did Sotomayor fall over? Her center of gravity must be about a foot from the floor.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:49 PM (MDlMP)

So you're saying she wobbles?

Posted by: hogmartin at April 19, 2018 01:50 PM (y87Qq)

486 I remember the killer bees scare long ago. They even made a movie with humans fighting for their lives as they were attack by the killer bees. What ever happened to that scare of probably 10-15 years ago.

Posted by: Colin at April 19, 2018 01:50 PM (9B2G/)

487 nood turtle

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at April 19, 2018 01:50 PM (hMwEB)

488 427---Nutria come to the US as an act of love, and they should be treated differently than species who illegally cross the border.
Posted by: Jeb! at April 19, 2018 01:37 PM (EzdLW)
-----------------
The hell you say.
We were imported for fur farms, death camps.
Can you spell REPARATIONS???

Posted by: National Association for the Advancement of La Raza Nutria at April 19, 2018 01:50 PM (0jtPF)

489 Weebles wobble but they don't fall down.

Posted by: Curmudgeon at April 19, 2018 01:50 PM (ujg0T)

490 Aneurysm ftw. Same goes for that commie bint RBG.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 19, 2018 01:50 PM (89T5c)

491 Ironic that the Okies that moved to CA eventually made the state Liberal and Oklahoma more conservative.

( don't know if that's true but sounded good)

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at April 19, 2018 01:51 PM (s9DTK)

492 Nutria gumbo, nutria burgers, nutria kebab, nutria tenders, nutria sausage......

Posted by: eleven at April 19, 2018 01:39 PM (+lOpA)
---
true story: someone opened a Cajun restaurant in the local area, and i was jazzed. until i stopped in and found out it was vegan.

seriously.

talk about an abomination before G*d.

Posted by: redc1c4 at April 19, 2018 01:51 PM (Zsmh3)

493 If you're going to San Francisco . . . there are gentle people there.
Posted by: mustbequantum at April 19, 2018 01:46 PM (MIKMs)

Before that poxy song, SF was actually quite like Pittsburgh or some place: a blue collar Democratic union town, with a heavy ethnic component (especially Italians, and to a lesser extent Chinese), very family-oriented (ironic, yes?), low crime, etc. actually a nice place to live.

Which hippies, then homosexuals and liberals obviously took as a challenge.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:52 PM (MDlMP)

494 What was Nasser's jail sentence? Hideous man.

For those that followed it, a nanny who stabbed to death a 6 and a 2 year old she had been watching in NYC was found guilty of murder. I thought the jury was doing to buy her defense lawyer's plea that she was mentally ill, Nope; She'll be sentenced in mid May.-may get life imprisonment. There's no death sentence in NY.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 19, 2018 01:53 PM (tpDAe)

495 Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor's shoulder injury is more severe than initially believed, the court's press office said Thursday.

Supreme Court spokeswoman Kathleen Arberg said in a statement to The Hill that Sotomayor, 63, will sit for arguments next week but curtail activities that require travel.

Called it. The way it was initially reported, they were acting like it was no big deal. They made a point to say she'd be back at work immediately, only a sling on her arm would inform the casual observer anything was wrong.

Except she's 63, diabetic, and obese. Once people with those conditions start falling down and breaking things, it's a big deal.

Posted by: bonhomme at April 19, 2018 01:54 PM (iv0p7)

496 The nutria. They come from Oregon. The Beaver State. The state forced them to leave. Beaver are willing to do the hard thankless task of collapsing levees and roads. THEY protect their native workers.

Posted by: Headless Body of Agnew at April 19, 2018 01:54 PM (e1mEI)

497 Five minutes in the microwave will recharge it.

Dick.

You destroyed my phone.

/just kidding

Posted by: bonhomme at April 19, 2018 01:55 PM (iv0p7)

498 Kill them, make fur coats out of their pelts, and give them to the homeless to keep them warm at night and in the winter. Watch liberal heads explode.

Posted by: Socratease at April 19, 2018 01:56 PM (BT83d)

499 What happened to California? Besides illegals, and the delusions of Wall Street Journal greedheads that they were somehow "natural conservatives", was The Irony Of Cold War Victory. We defeated the Communists abroad only to have Commiecrats take over at home. When the aerospace, related computer hardware and defense industries folded up and the military bases closed, there went the GOP in Cali. :-(

1978--besides the year of San Francisco going mad from the People's Temple to Dan White, it was the year Tourism--much of it Gay Sex related--overtook Financial Services as the main industry in San Francisco. (Believe it or not, at one time SF city fathers saw the city's post WW2 future as "Wall Street West" and a Pacific Rim financial center.)

1992--besides the year of LA rioting, it was the year Entertainment overtook Aerospace as the main industry of Los Angeles.

Posted by: Curmudgeon at April 19, 2018 01:57 PM (ujg0T)

500 Undocumented pets.

Posted by: Legal Classifier (GS-15) at April 19, 2018 01:58 PM (wx6iv)

501 /just kidding

Posted by: bonhomme at April 19, 2018 01:55 PM (iv0p7)

Did I say to turn the microwave on? Smartphones are like people; they need a quiet place to meditate every now and then. And a microwave, being effectively a Faraday cage, is electronically quiet to your phone.
-department of made-up bullshit department
(and I knew you are smart enough not have fallen for it)

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at April 19, 2018 01:59 PM (efC8N)

502 (496) But she's working on her knuckleball. She could still pitch in the AL.

Posted by: Burger Chef at April 19, 2018 02:01 PM (RuIsu)

503 494 If you're going to San Francisco . . . there are gentle people there.
Posted by: mustbequantum at April 19, 2018 01:46 PM (MIKMs)

Before that poxy song, SF was actually quite like Pittsburgh or some place: a blue collar Democratic union town, with a heavy ethnic component (especially Italians, and to a lesser extent Chinese), very family-oriented (ironic, yes?), low crime, etc. actually a nice place to live.

Which hippies, then homosexuals and liberals obviously took as a challenge.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2018 01:52 PM (MDlMP)

During WW2, then Korea, then Vietnam, outed homosexual servicemen were dishonorably discharged and shipped back to Fort Mason or Hunter's Point (later flown back to SFO and processed at Hunters Point or the Oakland Army terminal). They often settled in "The Tenderloin"

Posted by: Curmudgeon at April 19, 2018 02:02 PM (ujg0T)

504 Louisiana has also battled a much larger nutria invasion. But as to how the rodents ended up in California, nobody is quite sure.

Maybe Louisiana issued them drivers licenses and turned them loose on the rest of the country. You know, like California does with illegal aliens.

Posted by: Clay, unimpressed with your wokeness at April 19, 2018 02:02 PM (macz7)

505 "The Triple Lindy"

*genuflects*

Posted by: Tanner Boyle at April 19, 2018 02:03 PM (2wOtx)

506 As California's governor, I will be sending the National Guard to the border--as long as they do absolutely nothing, refuse all lawful orders and if Washington sends me a huge check.

I have also pardoned the undocumented nutria in San Francisco harbor. His only crime was to steal a gun and shoot some woman on the pier.

Posted by: Gov. Brown Jerry at April 19, 2018 02:06 PM (BNk/G)

507 They shouldn't be compelled to live in the shadows.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2018 02:11 PM (7ThJ3)

508 these rats are hard at work doing the work American rats refuse to do

Posted by: Chris M at April 19, 2018 02:11 PM (FGZtn)

509 a microwave, being effectively a Faraday cage, is electronically quiet to your phone.

I know you're being ironic, but this will actually kill the battery faster, because the phone will ramp up the power on its transmitter trying to make contact with a local cell.

Posted by: Socratease at April 19, 2018 02:16 PM (BT83d)

510 Nobody is asking the important questions here such as "what are the proper pronouns for California's Nutria-American voters?"

Posted by: Tanner Boyle at April 19, 2018 02:17 PM (2wOtx)

511 When Trump was 63, the only thing he was breaking was hookers' humps.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 19, 2018 02:20 PM (c+cGk)

512 There is no way in the world that I am going to sit through 28 seconds of commercial to view this article. It is just not important to me that California has screwed the pooch once again.

Posted by: Timothy Pruett at April 19, 2018 03:31 PM (QojJf)

513 An AR-15 would be a very effective weapon for reducing the nutria population to manageable levels.

Posted by: Red Dirt Man at April 19, 2018 03:53 PM (n6wn7)

514 GIVE THEM THE VOTE!

Posted by: hepcat at April 19, 2018 04:49 PM (5b+Sr)

515 Give the big rats driver's licenses: that way, they will be registered to vote for Democrats. Problem solved.

Posted by: Jeff Powell at April 19, 2018 05:59 PM (y5/+7)

516 They to sweet!

Posted by: Ketrin at April 23, 2018 02:53 AM (yO3dF)

517 They r really sweet! And they must to live!

Posted by: ProEssays at April 23, 2018 02:55 AM (yO3dF)

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