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Thursday Night ONT: ZAZ Edition

What's ZAZ you ask?

ZAZ.jpg

Tomorrow will be a more conventional ONT, and of course the ONT is an open thread, so you can talk about anything you'd like, but tonight the question on the floor is this: What is the greatest Zucker/Abrahams/Zucker movie? Singly or together they've made about two dozen movies, but we're going to concern ourselves with their irreverent, slapstick, joke-every-ten-seconds comedies. Which is a shame because Ruthless People is hilarious, but it doesn't quite meet those criteria.

And the finalists are....

The Kentucky Fried Movie (1977)

Much raunchier than their other works, KFM burst onto the scene in 1977 and created a genre. Centered around a long spoof of Enter The Dragon (Take him to....Detroit!), KFM featured everything from newscasters watching viewers fuck to Cleopatra Schwartz. Catholic High School Girls in Trouble, Rex Kramer, Danger Seeker..the list of skits goes on and on. Make sure to see it in Feel-A-Round.

Airplane! (1980)

What can you say about Airplane! that hasn't already been said? A movie stuffed so full of delicious one liners that it's difficult to go through a day without quoting it. Many people argue that it's the funniest movie of all time, and feel that anyone who disagrees should be committed to the Ronald Reagan Hospital for the Mentally Ill, where they cure people the old fashioned way. In any event, I haven't seen anything like this since the Anita Bryant concert.

Top Secret! (1984)

Just a simple story of a guy who fell in love with a woman that he met at a restaurant who turned out to be the daughter of a kidnapped scientist, only to lose her to her childhood lover who she last saw on a deserted island, who then turned out fifteen years later to be the leader of the French underground. The first time I saw this movie, well, the doctors did all they could, but it took them two hours just to get the smile off my face.

The Naked Gun series (1988-1994)

From the short lived Police Squad! TV series, where the guest star always died in the opening credits, came this epic movie franchise spanning three films. When not umpiring the greatest baseball game ever filmed, Frank Drebin was the star lieutenant of Police Squad, Los Angeles' crack detective unit. These are his stories. Watching these films is like having sex: It's a painstaking and arduous task that seems to go on and on forever, and just when you think things are going your way, nothing happens. Frankly the whole series might not amount to a hill of beans, but this is our hill, and these are our beans.

Not included: Airplane 2: The Sequel (None of the three worked on it, amazingly enough) and Hot Shots! (both) which were Abrahams solo projects. Feel free to quote from them in the thread, however, and remember: The popcorn you're eating has been pissed in.

Film at 11.

Posted by: WeirdDave at 09:32 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 THIS IS ONT!

Posted by: Asian Grad Student at January 04, 2018 09:25 PM (A7EKR)

2 ONTONTONT

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at January 04, 2018 09:26 PM (hMwEB)

3 Thank you!!!

Posted by: lin-duh at January 04, 2018 09:26 PM (kufk0)

4 This is a movie ONT huh

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at January 04, 2018 09:27 PM (hMwEB)

5 Hi, Jack!

Posted by: garrett at January 04, 2018 09:27 PM (A7EKR)

6 Howdy

Posted by: ALH at January 04, 2018 09:28 PM (fjf5L)

7 How about some coffee, Johnny?

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:28 PM (+Tibp)

8 Airplane! Bar none. Full stop. Head and shoulders. Creme de la creme. The Boss, the Big Cheese! El Numero Uno Honcho....


Thanks for the ONT.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 09:28 PM (AySfS)

9 Airplane for the win

Posted by: jsg at January 04, 2018 09:29 PM (T0yXe)

10 My kind of movies...

Posted by: Anon a mouse at January 04, 2018 09:29 PM (7LY+6)

11 Anyone here speak Jive!?

Posted by: garrett at January 04, 2018 09:29 PM (A7EKR)

12 Over Macho Picho?

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:29 PM (+Tibp)

13 Kentucky Fried Movie is my vote.

Posted by: Roc Ingersol at January 04, 2018 09:29 PM (pCPGh)

14 Yes, it is the long awaited ONT!

Posted by: Perry Helion at January 04, 2018 09:30 PM (gwPgz)

15 OT so remember the other day I was whining that I'd forgotten to buy travel insurance?

I was about to buy it today when I thought to check y email and it turns out I HAD already bought it a few days after I booked the trip.

I am losing my mind, aren't i?

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at January 04, 2018 09:30 PM (hMwEB)

16 Digging the escape tunnel with a spoon, in Top Secret.

Posted by: Sobek at January 04, 2018 09:30 PM (V/tfK)

17 What do you make of this, Johnny?

Posted by: josephistan at January 04, 2018 09:30 PM (ANIFC)

18 Well, I've just had my suspicions confirmed: I saw a coyote just a mile from the house. I've long thought that they must be around here, but now I know it.

The little local deer better be careful....

Posted by: Grey Fox at January 04, 2018 09:30 PM (bZ7mE)

19 12 Over Macho Grande?
Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:29 PM (+Tibp)

No... I don't think I'll ever get over Macho Grande.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 09:30 PM (AySfS)

20 ONT? Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.

Posted by: NaughtyPine with shifty eyes at January 04, 2018 09:30 PM (G8B7r)

21 Airplane edges out Naked Gun

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at January 04, 2018 09:30 PM (hMwEB)

22 building shelter out of seaweed and snot. With a functioning garage door opener, natch.

Posted by: Sobek at January 04, 2018 09:31 PM (V/tfK)

23 The Naked Gun is awesome.

Nordberg might be the best character in all of American Film.

Posted by: garrett at January 04, 2018 09:31 PM (A7EKR)

24 And don't cal me Shirley

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:31 PM (+Tibp)

25 I was debating as to whether I should watch "Police Squad!" TV show today.

Posted by: josephistan at January 04, 2018 09:31 PM (ANIFC)

26 He's all over the place. 5000 feet up to 40 thousand feet- back down to 10000 feet. What an asshole!

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 09:31 PM (AySfS)

27

Police Squad

IN COLOR

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 04, 2018 09:31 PM (IqV8l)

28 How can you beat the parody of Enter the Dragon?

Posted by: Roc Ingersol at January 04, 2018 09:31 PM (pCPGh)

29 So many white penises.

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 09:32 PM (5Isv3)

30 I like my coffee like my men, not white like your penis.

Posted by: Little Girl in Airplane at January 04, 2018 09:32 PM (FdNEK)

31 5 Great deleted scene. Not sure why it was removed.

Posted by: Johnny at January 04, 2018 09:32 PM (kUotE)

32 Can you save him, doctor?

I don't know. I'm not a very good doctor.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at January 04, 2018 09:32 PM (gC2IV)

33 He's all over the place. 5000 feet up to 40 thousand feet- back down to 10000 feet. What an asshole!
Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop

Guy who said that went on to be Mike Ermentrout on Breaking Bad.

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:32 PM (+Tibp)

34 Though it's tough to relegate KFM to 2nd place, Airplane! has to be #1.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at January 04, 2018 09:32 PM (pvjTE)

35 kfm was good, but airplane ftw.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at January 04, 2018 09:32 PM (KP5rU)

36 I know a little German

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 04, 2018 09:32 PM (IqV8l)

37 I am losing my mind, aren't i?"

Welcome to the club...

Posted by: Anon a mouse at January 04, 2018 09:33 PM (7LY+6)

38 Honky CIA Agent: "You don't scare me you slant eyed bastard!"

Slant Eyed Bastard: "Take him to Detroit!"

Honky CIA Agent: "Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

President Trump's favorite movie, I understand.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at January 04, 2018 09:33 PM (EoRCO)

39 What I love abut their movies is that they took actors known for serious work and made them genuinely funny: Lloyd Bridges, Leslie Nielsen, Peter Graves...

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 09:33 PM (bNbo2)

40 Uh...hey.

Posted by: Insomniac - Meet the New Year, same as the old year at January 04, 2018 09:33 PM (NWiLs)

41 Did I leave the iron on?

Posted by: Johnny at January 04, 2018 09:33 PM (kUotE)

42 Top Secret is badly underrated. Even so, I don't think I can vote for anything other than Airplane. The jokes are so incredibly in your face, but then there's the restful subtle jokes about "the white zone is for loading and unloading only."

Posted by: Sobek at January 04, 2018 09:33 PM (V/tfK)

43 Drebin singing the National Anthem

Buncha bombs in the air...

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at January 04, 2018 09:33 PM (4ErVI)

44 Airplane!

Not even close.

Posted by: Barak Hussien Obama, hiding in an Iranian well at January 04, 2018 09:33 PM (aN6O8)

45
Airplane!, by far.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at January 04, 2018 09:33 PM (eXA4G)

46 I speak jive...

Posted by: Barbara B at January 04, 2018 09:34 PM (FdNEK)

47 39 What I love abut their movies is that they took actors known for serious work and made them genuinely funny: Lloyd Bridges, Leslie Nielsen, Peter Graves...
Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 09:33 PM (bNbo2)

Robert Stack

Posted by: josephistan at January 04, 2018 09:34 PM (ANIFC)

48 I thought Hot Shots! was pretty funny.

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at January 04, 2018 09:34 PM (hMwEB)

49 I say let 'em crash!

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 04, 2018 09:34 PM (IqV8l)

50 Roger, Roger. What's our Vector, Victor

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:34 PM (+Tibp)

51 43 Drebin singing the National Anthem

Buncha bombs in the air...
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at January 04, 2018 09:33 PM (4ErVI)

Hey! It's Enrico Polazzo!

Posted by: josephistan at January 04, 2018 09:34 PM (ANIFC)

52 yo
high of 78 today
how am I supposed to survive Hawaii with less than 80 degree weather?

Posted by: concerned ncj is concerned at January 04, 2018 09:35 PM (nVqFs)

53 Thanks for a really fun ONT, WeirdDave!

It's obviously due to an effort of extraordinary magnitude.

Watched Top Secret again last year, doesn't really stand the test of time.

Posted by: ibguy at January 04, 2018 09:35 PM (vUcdz)

54 36 - one of my favorite lines ever!

Posted by: Sobek at January 04, 2018 09:35 PM (V/tfK)

55 although Hot Shots Part Deux might be funnier than Hot Shots

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at January 04, 2018 09:35 PM (hMwEB)

56 Looks like I picked the wrong day to quit AOSHQ.

Posted by: Johnny at January 04, 2018 09:35 PM (kUotE)

57 Top Secret was a funny movie. Lots of good sight gags. And "Skeet Surfin'" was genius.

Posted by: Insomniac - Meet the New Year, same as the old year at January 04, 2018 09:35 PM (NWiLs)

58
You know, once Leslie Nielsen started doing the slapstick, I couldn't watch any of his previous serious roles without laughing my ass off. There was a Columbo episode ('70s run) with Patrick McGoohan as a CIA guy who kills another agent, played by Leslie Nielsen.

The scenes were supposed to be straight, but I'm laughing my ass at Leslie the CIA agent, imaging Frank Drebin doing just what the character was doing.

Leslie once, in an interview, said here's how I do a serious line: blah, blah, blah.

Now, here's how I do a funny comedy line....and he does the exact same way.

And that's the damn truth.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 09:35 PM (8O3HH)

59 Robert Stack
Posted by: josephistan at January 04, 2018 09:34 PM (ANIFC)

Yup. Forgot about him.

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 09:35 PM (bNbo2)

60 Good luck you two. We're all counting on you.

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:35 PM (+Tibp)

61 >>I thought Hot Shots! was pretty funny.


The chick was really hot is what I remember.

Posted by: garrett at January 04, 2018 09:36 PM (A7EKR)

62 Can you ever go wrong with Catholic high school girls in trouble?

Posted by: Diogenes at January 04, 2018 09:36 PM (KomcD)

63 Skeet Surfing!

Posted by: Sobek at January 04, 2018 09:36 PM (V/tfK)

64 urp

Posted by: mindful webworker - content consumed at January 04, 2018 09:36 PM (NU2/k)

65 You know, I think the morons here are a little short on culture. Perhaps William Shakespeare tellin ya ta get out there and make some babies can help fix that.

https://youtu.be/5Eqju5VxezQ

Posted by: Zaklog the Great at January 04, 2018 09:36 PM (aKvfY)

66 "Cream?"

"No, thank you, I take it black, like my men."

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 09:36 PM (5Isv3)

67 Did Airplane have a guy on the stand have a rubber diildo on his head saying take me to your leader? That beats the paper hat.

Posted by: Roc Ingersol at January 04, 2018 09:36 PM (pCPGh)

68 There's a sale at Penny's!!!

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:36 PM (+Tibp)

69 i can't believe it, but i've never seen any of these.

Posted by: concrete girl at January 04, 2018 09:36 PM (nBzBk)

70 The Gandhi II, No More Passive Resistance scene in the KFM was side-splittingly funny.

And Airplane! What a great movie. However I learned my lesson the hard way. Airplane! is not a date movie.

Ruthless People is a superb movie and a date movie as well.

"Police Squad" is best in the TV show, not the movies. Extremely funny throughout. I guess the script writers could not complete more than 6 episodes of that high quality. So they did not.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at January 04, 2018 09:36 PM (hyuyC)

71 I thought Amazon Women on the Moon was one of theirs but it was just similar in style to KFM
I wonder if they were ever able to help Don 'No Soul' Simmons.

Posted by: JB1000 at January 04, 2018 09:37 PM (SGGel)

72 the funniest movie ever, bridges of madison county. that eastwood would be attracted to a sheep was hilarious. he did well.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at January 04, 2018 09:37 PM (KP5rU)

73 Excuse me, I speak jive.

Posted by: Minnfidel at January 04, 2018 09:37 PM (L3YlV)

74 Man, there were so many KFM gifs that I wanted to use but couldn't. The shower door tits from Catholic High School Girls in Trouble, "Are you aware of the penal codes in this state", the midget clown whipping the topless girls ("The movie that dares to reveal the truth about what happens when high school girls are allowed to stay out after curfew!"),.....So many, many visual gags in that movie..

Posted by: Weirddave at January 04, 2018 09:37 PM (Nyyc4)

75 Val Kilmer getting a jacket at the restaurant. It's great, but not quotable.

Posted by: Sobek at January 04, 2018 09:37 PM (V/tfK)

76 SKEET SURFIN'!!!

But Airplane is #1, of course.

Posted by: Rob Crawford at January 04, 2018 09:37 PM (fVubI)

77 One of the Zuckers also released the 2008 comedy "An American Carol", which had a character suspiciously similar to Michael Moore get recruited by Afghani terrorists to produce a video to help recruit suicide bombers.

It didn't do very well. But it's a very conservative movie, and definitely worth watching if you haven't seen it.

Posted by: junior at January 04, 2018 09:37 PM (nWA7B)

78 Airplane, definitely.

Posted by: rickl at January 04, 2018 09:38 PM (sdi6R)

79 I guess with faces like the Zuckers, you need to have a sense of humor in order to keep from slipping in despair. They look more Napoleon Dynamite than Napoleon Dynamite.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 04, 2018 09:38 PM (/qEW2)

80 Oh thank God.

So, Stephen Stucker was the swishy genius of "Airplane!". Apparently the ZAZ guys just rolled film and let him do his thing (as it were). The highlights:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1U7YU9rZS4w

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at January 04, 2018 09:38 PM (qJtVm)

81 "
Listen Betty, don't start up with your white zone shit again."

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 09:38 PM (5Isv3)

82 Toy Robot!! Toy Robot!!

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:38 PM (+Tibp)

83 Airplane = slightly better than The Naked Gun. But both are great. Do you speak jive?

Posted by: Sensitive new age guy at January 04, 2018 09:38 PM (mYDmK)

84 The chick was really hot is what I remember.

Posted by: garrett at January 04, 2018 09:36 PM (A7EKR)

Valeria Golino
You could fry an egg on her abs

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at January 04, 2018 09:38 PM (hMwEB)

85 Leslie Nielsens brother was a Canadian prime minister or governor or something like that.

Posted by: Roc Ingersol at January 04, 2018 09:39 PM (pCPGh)

86 Bingo!

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:40 PM (+Tibp)

87 Did Airplane have a guy on the stand have a rubber diildo on his head
saying take me to your leader? That beats the paper hat.


KFM

Posted by: Weirddave at January 04, 2018 09:40 PM (Nyyc4)

88
"Oh, it's a big pretty white plane with red stripes, curtains in the windows and wheels and it looks like a big Tylenol."

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 09:40 PM (5Isv3)

89 The hospital! What is it?

Posted by: Minnfidel at January 04, 2018 09:40 PM (L3YlV)

90 Leslie Nielsen was the captain in the Forbidden Planet, go figure.

Posted by: ..-. ..- -.-. -.- at January 04, 2018 09:40 PM (MTjB1)

91 The hospital! What is it?
Posted by: Minnfidel

It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now....

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:41 PM (+Tibp)

92 Nice beaver!

Posted by: Frank Drebin at January 04, 2018 09:41 PM (FdNEK)

93 79 I guess with faces like the Zuckers, you need to have a sense of humor in order to keep from slipping in despair.

--

They are a lot better looking than the Wachowski brothers or sisters or whataver they are now

Posted by: @votermom @vm pimping great books usually free or sale at January 04, 2018 09:41 PM (hMwEB)

94 Airplane hands down.

>>>>The chick was really hot is what I remember.<<<<

"We call her Little Sizzlin' Belly....."

Posted by: the guy that moves pianos for a living at January 04, 2018 09:41 PM (3DZIZ)

95 Trouble in the Cockpit. What is it?

The small room at the front of the plane where the pilot sits, but that's not important now.

Posted by: JB1000 at January 04, 2018 09:41 PM (SGGel)

96 52 yo
high of 78 today
how am I supposed to survive Hawaii with less than 80 degree weather?
Posted by: concerned ncj



I don't know. I'm watching the suffering of the PGA Tour players on Maui. I don't know how they can stand it. Why here in NoVA, its a cozy 15 degrees. Nice breeze too. Suppose to go down to 9.

Posted by: Puddleglum at January 04, 2018 09:41 PM (Ncqdf)

97 No question. Airplane!

Where else could you see Lloyd Douglas huffing glue?

Posted by: San Franpsycho at January 04, 2018 09:41 PM (EZebt)

98 Posted by: Weirddave at January 04, 2018 09:40 PM (Nyyc4)

Yes,I was attempting to defend my pick of KFM as #1.

Posted by: Roc Ingersol at January 04, 2018 09:42 PM (pCPGh)

99 One of my favorites from Naked Gun:

Bingo!

Posted by: Axeman at January 04, 2018 09:42 PM (vDqXW)

100 Valeria Golino

Holy balls she was hot. And funny.

if I were joking I'd say "What do you do with an elephant with three balls?"

What?

"Walk him and pitch to the rhino."

Yes. Seriously hot.

I just might be binge watching some funny movies this weekend. Well done, Weirddave.

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 09:42 PM (bNbo2)

101 concentrate... concentrate... I've got to concentrate... concentrate...
concentrate... Hello?... hello... hello... Echo... echo... echo...

Pinch
hitting for Pedro Borbon...

Manny Mota... Mota... Mota..

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 09:42 PM (5Isv3)

102 The Big Bus FTW! (1976)

Posted by: bergerbilder at January 04, 2018 09:42 PM (lIZQs)

103 I like to imagine Hillary on election night as the panicked woman, and all the people lined up are her campaign staff.

Posted by: Johnny at January 04, 2018 09:42 PM (6Odec)

104
Airplane! was based on Zero Hour!, starring Dana Andrews:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-v2BHNBVCs

They bought the rights to the Zero Hour! script just to be safe.

Police Squad! was similarly derived from some old QUinn Martin series called "M Squad". There's a similar side-by-side comparison of that as well, if you search for it.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 09:42 PM (8O3HH)

105 Nice beaver.

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 09:43 PM (5Isv3)

106 Which chick in airplane are you morons referring to? The one who got her top ripped off during "crash positions" ? Yes I paused that on the old VCR. Allot.

Posted by: Minnfidel at January 04, 2018 09:44 PM (L3YlV)

107 And tell the Milkman, NO MORE CHEESE!

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:44 PM (+Tibp)

108 Funniest part was the Mutalimba tribe learning basketball, imo.

Posted by: Johnny at January 04, 2018 09:44 PM (6Odec)

109 You couldn't make Airplane! today because waycist and sexist and probably homophobic too because of the gay guy...who was one of the best parts of it actually.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at January 04, 2018 09:44 PM (4ErVI)

110 ZAZ was hilarious and brilliant for a while then got a bit lame. Still, they put out some real gems and even Mel Brooks didn't keep up his genius forever.

Hot Shots was not bad, but part 2 was even better, I thought.

One of the Zuckers wrote Baseketball which was a pretty fun movie as well.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 09:44 PM (39g3+)

111 Sorry, no. No movie is ever going to be funnier than Blazing Saddles. Ever.

For a while, every time I saw Obama on tv, all I could think of was

"Schvartze!?I"

Posted by: tcn in AK at January 04, 2018 09:45 PM (NXsWM)

112 96 I play the sony open qualifier tomorrow
hopefully Ill play those shitbags next week

Posted by: concerned ncj is concerned at January 04, 2018 09:45 PM (nVqFs)

113 It's a damn good thing you don't know how much he hates your guts.

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 09:45 PM (5Isv3)

114
Leslie Nielsen was fart joke master, as well. A master of the whoopie cushion, and making fart sounds with his hands and under his armpits.

He was doing that all that time on the set, well before he did comedy.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 09:45 PM (8O3HH)

115 96 52 yo
high of 78 today
how am I supposed to survive Hawaii with less than 80 degree weather?
Posted by: concerned ncj


I don't know. I'm watching the suffering of the PGA Tour players on Maui. I don't know how they can stand it. Why here in NoVA, its a cozy 15 degrees. Nice breeze too. Suppose to go down to 9.



It hasn't been above zero here in damn near two weeks.

Posted by: Minnfidel at January 04, 2018 09:46 PM (L3YlV)

116 It didn't do very well. But it's a very conservative movie, and definitely worth watching if you haven't seen it.

Posted by: junior at January 04, 2018 09:37 PM (nWA7B)


========

I really enjoyed that! Some very un-PC snark, and a very clever premise. And John Voight as "creepy George Washington".

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 04, 2018 09:46 PM (/qEW2)

117 Naked Gun was a pretty hilarious movie and the sequel was still pretty good. It is always great watching OJ get mangled and horribly wounded over and over as well.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 09:46 PM (39g3+)

118 Loo: Shanghaied?
Dr. Klahn: Just lost drunken men who don't know where they are and no longer care.
Prisoner #1: Where are we?
Prisoner #2: I don't care!
Loo: And these?
Dr. Klahn: These are lost drunken men who don't know where they are, but do care! And these are men who know where they are and care, but don't drink.
Prisoner #3: I don't know who I am!
Prisoner #4: Yeah. and I don't drink.
Dr. Klahn: Guards!

Kinda like the US Congress......

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at January 04, 2018 09:47 PM (EoRCO)

119 Charlie Sheen is insane but he has excellent comedy timing. Hot Shots was pretty good.

Posted by: Roc Ingersol at January 04, 2018 09:47 PM (pCPGh)

120 MCrosky : Get me every piece of
emergency equipment you can reach. Alert rescue units
every mile of the way, from here to the rockies.
Towergy : Chief . . .
MCrosky : We'll need a pre-landing flight check, tell 'em I want
it in the dispatch office and tell 'em I want it here
fast.
Towergy : Its your wife.
MCrosky : ( To wife ) I want the kids in bed by nine, the dog
fed, the yard watered and the gate locked. And get a
note to the milkman NO MORE CHEESE!


---
http://2000clicks.com/graeme/LangMoviesFunnyAirplaneScript.htm

Posted by: Axeman at January 04, 2018 09:47 PM (vDqXW)

121 So, the postman left me a slip for a registered package from a land far away. The slip said I had to go to the post office to pick it up or schedule a redelivery. Got in the car, started punching in the address printed on the slip for the post office.
GPS would not recognize the address so I went to google. google took the address I punched in and gave me a slightly modified address. So I went where google said to go. Got to the post office and they had my package. When I was leaving I asked the postperson if he knew the address on their slip was incorrect. His response was "yeah but we had 10,000 of them printed up so we have to use them up."

The post office is giving out docs with the incorrect address. The zip code is right though.

Posted by: ---.-./-.--- - at January 04, 2018 09:47 PM (MTjB1)

122 Sorry, Lloyd Bridges.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at January 04, 2018 09:48 PM (EZebt)

123 Excuse me while I whip this bleached cock out.

Posted by: Minnfidel at January 04, 2018 09:48 PM (L3YlV)

124 Famous Jewish Sports Legends

Posted by: jsg at January 04, 2018 09:49 PM (T0yXe)

125 Hot Shots Part Duex had a bunch of Buddhist Monks in it, looking at a fetching figure. Pretty good.

But the carrier scenes in Hot Shots Part One were very funny to me.

Posted by: -. .- -.-. .-.. -.-- / -.. --- --. at January 04, 2018 09:49 PM (hyuyC)

126 . It is always great watching OJ get mangled and horribly wounded over and over as well.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 09:46 PM (39g3+)
---
It's aged surprisingly well.

Unlike Bill Cosby: Himself.

Posted by: Axeman at January 04, 2018 09:49 PM (vDqXW)

127 Saw Airplane and Indiana Jones with my dad.

Those were basically our two good moments together.

Posted by: that doesn't even make sense at January 04, 2018 09:49 PM (+lOpA)

128 I don't mean to sound forward. I mean, I know I don't know you. But I
don't think we're gonna live through this. And... I've never been with a
man before....

That's from Airplane 2. A lot of the lines you think are from Airplane! are from Airplane 2, that's why it's so amazing ZAZ weren't involved. And Shatner's Buck Murdock is much better than Robert Stack's Rex Kramer.

Posted by: Weirddave at January 04, 2018 09:49 PM (Nyyc4)

129 Ooops. that was me.

Posted by: eleven at January 04, 2018 09:50 PM (+lOpA)

130 18 Well, I've just had my suspicions confirmed: I saw a coyote just a mile from the house. I've long thought that they must be around here, but now I know it.

The little local deer better be careful....
Posted by: Grey Fox


A few years ago a coyote walked into a downtown Chicago Quiznos and went into the beverage refrigerator. At the time there were photos of people standing there looking at it.

Posted by: nerdygirl at January 04, 2018 09:50 PM (+lVUW)

131 Just finished watching Love Actually. One of you all recommended it as a Christmas movie.
It started off slow, except for the soft porn, which caught Mr. H's interest, but then it got better. At the end, my eyes got a little misty.

Hugh Grant is adorable, which helped.

Posted by: ALH at January 04, 2018 09:50 PM (fjf5L)

132 *Big Grin*

Posted by: Otto Pilot at January 04, 2018 09:50 PM (6Odec)

133 Airplane is also startlingly close to the John Wayne movie: High and the Mighty. I think Zero Hour was a rip off of HatM and Airplane was a shot for shot remake of zero hour.

High and The Mighty is a great movie too. Robert Stack, John Wayne and a lot of other character actors.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 09:50 PM (AySfS)

134 118 Loo: Shanghaied?
Dr. Klahn: Just lost drunken men who don't know where they are and no longer care.
Prisoner #1: Where are we?
Prisoner #2: I don't care!
Loo: And these?
Dr. Klahn: These are lost drunken men who don't know where they are, but do care! And these are men who know where they are and care, but don't drink.
Prisoner #3: I don't know who I am!
Prisoner #4: Yeah. and I don't drink.
Dr. Klahn: Guards!
Posted by: Hairyback Guy at January 04, 2018 09:47 PM (EoRCO)


Can't believe you omitted the dialog after, which was wonderful. From memory.

Dr. Klahn (to Prisoner # 4): Do you care?
Prisioner #4: No
Dr. Klahn: Guards! Put this man in Cell Number 5 and GIVE HIM A DRINK!
Guard (to Prisoner #4): What do you drink?
Prisoner #4: I don't care

Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 09:50 PM (Vb4BV)

135 109 You couldn't make Airplane! today because waycist and sexist and probably homophobic too because of the gay guy...who was one of the best parts of it actually.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at January 04, 2018 09:44 PM (4ErVI)

But they made Soul Plane with no problem at all. It was a continuous line of white people jokes. None very funny.

Posted by: Roc Ingersol at January 04, 2018 09:50 PM (pCPGh)

136 And Shatner's Buck Murdock is much better than Robert Stack's Rex Kramer.
Posted by: Weirddave

Irony can be pretty ironic. - Shatner

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:50 PM (+Tibp)

137 I love when the Israeli airliner lands and it has the beard and yarmulke on. If you did that today, rayissd! Same with Barbara Billingsky's scene

Posted by: Minnfidel at January 04, 2018 09:50 PM (L3YlV)

138 Welp... we just had a shooting right up the street, about a half mile away. I have told my husband for 2 years now we need to move. Section 8 housing probably drug related. Think this will put a fire under his ass?

Posted by: Jewells45 at January 04, 2018 09:51 PM (CNHr1)

139 And Shatner's Buck Murdock is much better than Robert Stack's Rex Kramer.
Posted by: Weirddave at January 04, 2018 09:49 PM (Nyyc4)


Loved Shat in that.

Posted by: eleven at January 04, 2018 09:51 PM (+lOpA)

140 Top Secret is my absolute favorite Zucker/Abrams film. The bookshop scene alone is mind blowing when you consider the fact the entire thing was filmed backwards in one take.

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 09:51 PM (ITvKk)

141 Entering without a search warrant, destroying property, arson, sexual assault with a concrete dildo...

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 09:51 PM (5Isv3)

142
The droning propeller noise in Airplane! (on a jet, of course), was straight from the soundtrack of Zero Hour.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 09:52 PM (8O3HH)

143 "Shouldn't we turn on the runway lights?"

Robert Stack: No! That's what they'll be expecting us to do!

Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 09:52 PM (Vb4BV)

144 Auntie Em it's a twister!!!!

Posted by: Minnfidel at January 04, 2018 09:53 PM (L3YlV)

145 SGTYork

The scene where the Pinto explodes was excellent.

Posted by: -. .- -.-. .-.. -.-- / -.. --- --. at January 04, 2018 09:53 PM (hyuyC)

146 IT'S ENRICO PALAZZO!

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 09:53 PM (bNbo2)

147 Airplane 2 was really funny, surprisingly so since it was a studio knockoff of Airplane 1.

Only two of the ZAZ guys were involved in Top Secret! with Val Kilmer. Apparently his first role, too. But that was really hilarious.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 09:54 PM (39g3+)

148 >> concrete dildo...

I remember that now, and had forgotten. I was laughing my ass off. IIRC, he grabs on to the statue's dick for dear life, after being screamed at for grabbing the girl's boobs.

The dick grows erect....and breaks off in his hand, and he comes in the room like he's attacking the girl with the giant concrete dildo.

I was laughing my ass off.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 09:54 PM (8O3HH)

149 How Frank Drebbin would deal with the Ayatollahs.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6nW7XvTYn0

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 04, 2018 09:54 PM (/qEW2)

150 The runtime of the three Naked Gun movies should be about twice the runtime of the entire Police Squad TV series.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at January 04, 2018 09:54 PM (oVJmc)

151 What's a MAN doing with a bobby pin?

Posted by: Weirddave at January 04, 2018 09:54 PM (Nyyc4)

152 Tonight's ONT comes equipped with BIG JIM SLADE!

Posted by: Trimegistus at January 04, 2018 09:54 PM (UC678)

153 Top Secret is my absolute favorite Zucker/Abrams film. The bookshop scene alone is mind blowing when you consider the fact the entire thing was filmed backwards in one take.

The underwater bar fight was pretty wild too. They did some very creative stuff in that one.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 09:54 PM (39g3+)

154 *to Hari-krishnas*
"We're from the Church of religious conciousness, would you like to make a donation?"

Hari-Krishnas:
"No thanks, we gave at the office."

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 09:55 PM (AySfS)

155 MUST. KILL. PAPSCHMEER

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 09:55 PM (+Tibp)

156
The post office is giving out docs with the incorrect address. The zip code is right though.
Posted by: ---.-./-.--- - at January 04, 2018 09:47 PM (MTjB1)

===

You found it, didn't you? Sheesh. *eye roll*
-USPS

Posted by: San Franpsycho at January 04, 2018 09:55 PM (EZebt)

157 What Do the Deep State and the Iranian State Have in Common?

"I want to believe the path you threw out for consideration in Andy's office that there's no way he gets elected--but I'm afraid we can't take that risk. It's like an insurance policy..."--FBI Counterintelligence Deputy Peter Strzok

"Although this blind sedition was so small that a portion of the police force was able to nip it in the bud...you can rest assured that your comrades in the Islamic Republic's army would be ready to confront the dupes..."--IRI Major General Abdolrahim Mousavi

Iran Deploys Revolutionary Guards to Quell "Sedition"...and Obama Deployed the FBI/FISA/Mueller Deep State Guards to Quell the Trump Movement "Sedition". That's the Mullah/Mueller link.

Both are criminal conspiracies to thwart legitimate mass movements for freedom. One in Iran, one in America. Yes, the details are different; for example, we don't shoot young dissenters in the street here, except for Seth Rich.

But it's the same criminal impulse to cling to power at all costs.

And Obama backed them both.

But that's not important now.

Posted by: The Gipper Lives at January 04, 2018 09:55 PM (Ndje9)

158 From the Naked Gun TV Series:

Villian: Who are you, and how did you get in here?
Frank Drebin, under cover as a locksmith: I'm the locksmith, and, I'm the locksmith

Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 09:55 PM (Vb4BV)

159 Ima gonna go watch Airplane now. :-)

Posted by: Otto Pilot at January 04, 2018 09:56 PM (kUotE)

160 Speaking of Shatner... anyone seen Better late than never? Holy crap! Thats some funny stuff.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at January 04, 2018 09:56 PM (tnRJU)

161 ..."And I can't live with a man I can't respect!! Goodbye Ted!"

*walks away tearfully*

"What a pisser!"

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 09:56 PM (AySfS)

162 Airplane! is the ultimate flypaper movie for me.

Kind of along the lines of KFM is "Amazon Women On the Moon" and it's hilarious as well.

Posted by: Mitchell at January 04, 2018 09:57 PM (ZhFYR)

163 "She was six feet of black dynamite! He was a short Hasidic Jew!"

If only "Cleopatra Schwartz" was actually made......what a movie!

"While she burned the ghetto to the ground, he kindled the Sabbath candles."

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at January 04, 2018 09:57 PM (EoRCO)

164 Villian: Who are you, and how did you get in here?
Frank Drebin, under cover as a locksmith: I'm the locksmith, and, I'm the locksmith
Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 09:55 PM (Vb4BV)

Ha! Best ONT in a long time. My face hurts from all the laughing.

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 09:57 PM (bNbo2)

165 Only two of the ZAZ guys were involved in Top Secret!

Wiki says all 3.

Posted by: Weirddave at January 04, 2018 09:57 PM (Nyyc4)

166 Backwards...in a single take...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uuYTVl0iOkkab_channel=Movieclips

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 09:58 PM (ITvKk)

167 I'm not wearing any pants.

Film at 11.

Posted by: Malaking Baboy at January 04, 2018 09:58 PM (0vgCj)

168
Assault with the concrete dildo scene:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNPgZ_3el4c

NSFW.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 09:58 PM (8O3HH)

169 Hard to believe OJ Simpson was a vital and funny part of Naked Gun.

Posted by: Laser White Penis at January 04, 2018 09:58 PM (9rx6L)

170 THey tried to do another KFM or Amazon Women with The Onion Movie which really was pretty disappointing. Except for this sequence:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mMByDfFMPcE

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 09:59 PM (39g3+)

171 I can assure you that penis whitening has nothing to do with my anal bleaching.

I only did it because I had a coupon.

I gotta admit, it apparently looks better than ever.

Posted by: Dang at January 04, 2018 09:59 PM (8b+oT)

172 Latrine!

Posted by: Beartooth at January 04, 2018 09:59 PM (KxxpQ)

173 138 Welp... we just had a shooting right up the street, about a half mile away. I have told my husband for 2 years now we need to move. Section 8 housing probably drug related. Think this will put a fire under his ass?
Posted by: Jewells45 at January 04, 2018 09:51 PM (CNHr1)

shooting last weekend in Denver? the cop ambush?

Within 1 mile of my old home... in a real nice suburban neighborhood... 1 block away from me were 1 million dollar homes....

You just never know now... no where is actually safe.

Posted by: Don Q. at January 04, 2018 09:59 PM (NgKpN)

174 Posted by: Puddleglum at January 04, 2018 09:41 PM (Ncqdf)

NOAA says with wind chill correction temps will not be above 0F until maybe Sunday night, ouch!

Posted by: Perry Helion at January 04, 2018 09:59 PM (gwPgz)

175 "The underwater bar fight was pretty wild too. They did some very creative stuff in that one."

YES! Thank you for reminding me... I gotta go watch that movie now.

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 09:59 PM (ITvKk)

176 That's it. I am watching KFM. I bought it on DVD after seeing it on cable somewhere (IFC?), but haven't watched it since.

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 10:00 PM (bNbo2)

177 "Cut me some slack jack! Chump don't want no help, Chump don't get dick help!"

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 10:00 PM (AySfS)

178 High and The Mighty is a great movie too. Robert Stack, John Wayne and a lot of other character actors.

Phil Harris, the singer.

Which makes that movie my dad's PERFECT MOVIE. Which he had no idea even existed until I told him about it. A John Wayne movie with Phil Harris?!

(Sadly, Phil doesn't sing. Thankfully, Wayne doesn't either.)

Posted by: Rob Crawford at January 04, 2018 10:00 PM (fVubI)

179 "Latrine!"

"We've got to put a stop to these afternoon football games!"

"And now the East German National Anthem, sung by the East German Women's Olympic Team!"

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 10:00 PM (ITvKk)

180 "What did we have for dinner tonight?"
"Well, there was a choice: Chicken or fish."
"I remember- I had the lasagna."

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 10:01 PM (AySfS)

181 #146

Dammit! I was gonna say that one!

Posted by: Navin R Johnson at January 04, 2018 10:02 PM (Ps5c1)

182 The Gandhi II, No More Passive Resistance scene in the KFM was side-splittingly funny.

That's from Weird Al's 'UHF.'

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at January 04, 2018 10:02 PM (oVJmc)

183 Should I bring out the LeRoy Nieman?

No. We can't risk violating the Geneva Convention.

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 10:02 PM (+Tibp)

184 39 What I love abut their movies is that they took actors known for serious work and made them genuinely funny: Lloyd Bridges, Leslie Nielsen, Peter Graves...
Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down


That was brilliant.The lines are funny because they deliver them with such seriousness.

Posted by: nerdygirl at January 04, 2018 10:02 PM (+lVUW)

185 Mrs. Nordberg, I think we can save your husband's arm.

Where would you like it sent?

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 10:02 PM (5Isv3)

186 Chocolate Mousse *chuckling* "Gasoline!"

Posted by: Weirddave at January 04, 2018 10:03 PM (Nyyc4)

187 I've fallen for you like a blind roofer.

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 10:03 PM (bNbo2)

188 This is the movie thread or am I moron drunk?

Posted by: colfax mingo at January 04, 2018 10:03 PM (C8LGv)

189 And because I'll hate myself if I don't:

"Joey, do you like movies with gladiators?"
"Joey, ever spend time in a turkish prison?"
"Joey, ever like it when Scraps humps your leg?"

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 10:03 PM (AySfS)

190 Have you ever seen a gladiator movie?

Posted by: San Franpsycho at January 04, 2018 10:03 PM (EZebt)

191 and he comes in the room like he's attacking the girl with the giant concrete dildo.

I was laughing my ass off.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 09:54 PM (8O3HH)


========

For me, the funniest part in the sequence was afterwards when his uptight supervisor was reprimanding him "I can't believe these charges of misconduct! Breaking and entering ... assault with a concrete dildo!"

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 04, 2018 10:04 PM (/qEW2)

192
IIRC, Peter Graves balked at saying those lines. They had to really coax him into doing it, telling him, trust us, it's gonna be funny as hell, they're not going to think it's sick, it's going to be funny.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 10:05 PM (8O3HH)

193 "The scene where the Pinto explodes was excellent."

*tink*

*KABOOM!*

As I'm thinking of it, Top Secret is filled with so many more sight gags than dialogue jokes partly because the Zuckers/Abrams were somewhat restricted with plane interiors, etc.

Seriously, this is a movie with a scene in a European park that has a giant statue of a pigeon, and several guys fly in, pee on it, and fly out again...and then the statue poops.

And then there's the pony singing opera and coughing:
"Is he OK?"
"Oh sure, he's just a little horse."

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 10:05 PM (ITvKk)

194 Posted by: Jewells45 at January 04, 2018 09:51 PM (CNHr1)

---
since i never got my Moron's Guide to Morons and 'Ettes, remind me, where is it you live? (generally speaking, of course)

i live in a supposedly upscale part of Lost Angels, and we have drug
dealers, strolling hostesses, home invasions, and all the other
attractions of the inner city, which i also suspect are Section 8
related, among other causes.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 04, 2018 10:05 PM (JTKl5)

195 I heard Police Squad was cancelled because you had to pay attention to the screen all the time.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 04, 2018 10:06 PM (IqV8l)

196 There's a new fad going around. Penis whitening. The kids are calling it Navin Johnson.

Posted by: Ice-T at January 04, 2018 10:06 PM (a1s18)

197 It's an entire different kind of flying, altogether.

Posted by: jsg at January 04, 2018 10:06 PM (T0yXe)

198 Favorite moment from Top Secret: Val Kilmer, belly crawling across the lawn, infiltrating a Nazi headquarters, when, suddenly, the toes of a shiny black pair of boots appear right in front of his eyes.

He looks up slowly, and the camera view moves with his eyes...and it's just an empty pair of boots, standing there in his path. Big sigh of relief.

Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 10:06 PM (Vb4BV)

199 "What I love abut their movies is that they took actors known for
serious work and made them genuinely funny: Lloyd Bridges, Leslie
Nielsen, Peter Graves..."

Val Kilmer doing his own singing...

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 10:07 PM (ITvKk)

200 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-v2BHNBVCs

this is fantastic, and I didn't know about Zero Hour and it's connection to Airplane!

Which is of course, my #1 ZAZ movie.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at January 04, 2018 10:07 PM (z79tQ)

201 Yeah if you watch the voiceover for Airplane, the Zuckers explain how Graves just did not get what the hell was going on, and Stack caught on immediately. He basically steered Graves along and had a great time. Not all of the straight actors the hired were in on the joke.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:08 PM (39g3+)

202 191 For me, the funniest part in the sequence was afterwards when his uptight supervisor was reprimanding him "I can't believe these charges of misconduct! Breaking and entering ... assault with a concrete dildo!"
Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 04, 2018 10:04 PM (/qEW2)


Was that the scene with the Dirty Harry callback?

Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 10:08 PM (Vb4BV)

203

Out of those? Airplane, no question. Ruthless People is awesome... criminally under rated. I mean, it's well known, generally, but unlike Airplane, it doesn't get the kudos it deserves.

Posted by: otho at January 04, 2018 10:08 PM (qGuLD)

204 "Favorite moment from Top Secret: Val Kilmer, belly crawling across the
lawn, infiltrating a Nazi headquarters, when, suddenly, the toes of a
shiny black pair of boots appear right in front of his eyes."

And then there's the scene of two guys in a cow suit....

"You're always in such a bloody rush!"

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 10:08 PM (ITvKk)

205
TCM once showed Zero Hour followed by Airplane!

Or was it the other way around?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 04, 2018 10:09 PM (IqV8l)

206 red, I live in Lee's Summit, MO a suburb of Kansas City. It's a nice neighborhood but like I said, a half mile away is section 8 apartments. This makes me sick. I knew things were going south 2 years ago.

Posted by: Jewells45 at January 04, 2018 10:09 PM (CNHr1)

207 Ruthless People was quite good, not as goofy but funny and biting.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:10 PM (39g3+)

208 Because it's totally bitchin' riding waves and blasting pidgeons...

Posted by: Blutarksi-esque 0.0 at January 04, 2018 10:10 PM (+Tibp)

209 Also see a comparison between Police Squad and M Squad, with Lee Marvin.

One of the Police Squad episodes was near frame by frame replica of an M Squad episode.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 10:10 PM (8O3HH)

210 The Social Justice Nonsense on ESPN doesn't always bother me, but it's been especially annoying tonight. I've been watching college basketball, which is one of the few things they still do a good job with, and one of the commentators, f***ing Walton something or other, has spent like half the broadcast talking about Utah (which I guess is where they are) and how it's such a great place for solar energy experimentation and being progressive in the fight to stop climate change. Which, a) no, and b) shut up and focus on the @#$%ing game already! I've changed it to Cops three or four times to get away from the stupid hippie.

Posted by: T at January 04, 2018 10:11 PM (MmeCn)

211 "Should I bring out the LeRoy Nieman?



No. We can't risk violating the Geneva Convention."

'My father was born in the United States, but managed to escape in a hot air balloon during the Carter administration.'

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 10:11 PM (ITvKk)

212 Val Kilimer followed Top Secret! with Real Genius, also a great hilarious film. The guy was really, really good. He's not the most handsome man in the world any more though, he put on a ton of weight and then got cancer but I'd cast him in anything no matter how he looks. Him and Mickey Rourke.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:11 PM (39g3+)

213 72 the funniest movie ever, bridges of madison county. that eastwood would be attracted to a sheep was hilarious. he did well.
Posted by: chavez the hugo


I'm ashamed to say I actually bought a ticket to that mess.
All I can remember about it is that Meryl's kids didn't show enough appreciation when she made their lunches or something, so she cheated on her husband. The dang whore.

Posted by: nerdygirl at January 04, 2018 10:11 PM (+lVUW)

214 Who the hell buys travel insurance?? I mean, WHY??

Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January 04, 2018 10:11 PM (QU+qf)

215 I don't know why, but I can't even think of "This. is. not. a. chawade." without cracking up.

Apparently the guy who spoke actual Korean in that movie was apologizing to Korean audiences. They just told him to talk Korean for a while.

Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 10:12 PM (Vb4BV)

216 Ruthless People was the first time I saw Bill Pullman.

Never saw him in another role like the Miami Vice wannabe.

Posted by: Axeman at January 04, 2018 10:12 PM (vDqXW)

217 Give me Dr. Ham On five and hold the Mayo.

Posted by: Minnfidel at January 04, 2018 10:12 PM (L3YlV)

218 Mr. Peebles

Thanks for the correction. Still funny, but not as funny as Airplane, Ruthless People, or Top Secret. All of which I own.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at January 04, 2018 10:12 PM (hyuyC)

219 iirc, Zero Hour even had the line about the plane handling like a wet sponge.

Posted by: davidt at January 04, 2018 10:12 PM (FdNEK)

220

"Joey, do you like movies with gladiators?"
"Joey, ever spend time in a turkish prison?"
"Joey, ever like it when Scraps humps your leg?"
Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 10:03 PM

Joey, you ever seen a grown man naked?

Posted by: NaughtyPine with shifty eyes at January 04, 2018 10:12 PM (G8B7r)

221 212 Val Kilimer followed Top Secret! with Real Genius, also a great hilarious film. The guy was really, really good. He's not the most handsome man in the world any more though, he put on a ton of weight and then got cancer but I'd cast him in anything no matter how he looks. Him and Mickey Rourke.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:11 PM (39g3+)


Don't forget Kiss Kiss Bang Bang.

Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 10:12 PM (Vb4BV)

222 Val Kilimer followed Top Secret! with Real Genius, also a great hilarious film. The guy was really, really good. He's not the most handsome man in the world any more though, he put on a ton of weight and then got cancer but I'd cast him in anything no matter how he looks. Him and Mickey Rourke.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:11 PM (39g3+)
---
He had the best lines in Kiss Kiss Bang Bang.

Posted by: Axeman at January 04, 2018 10:13 PM (vDqXW)

223 OK, great line from Ruthless People.

"This could be the stupidest man in the world. Perhaps we should shoot him".

Posted by: Weirddave at January 04, 2018 10:13 PM (Nyyc4)

224 213 72 the funniest movie ever, bridges of madison county. that eastwood would be attracted to a sheep was hilarious. he did well.
Posted by: chavez the hugo

I'm ashamed to say I actually bought a ticket to that mess.
All I can remember about it is that Meryl's kids didn't show enough appreciation when she made their lunches or something, so she cheated on her husband. The dang whore.
Posted by: nerdygirl at January 04, 2018 10:11 PM (+lVUW)


Word is that the Japanese loved that movie. Appealed to their sense of the tragedy of life, or something.

Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 10:13 PM (Vb4BV)

225
This is ... different.

Posted by: Skandia Recluse at January 04, 2018 10:13 PM (GroCc)

226
Here it is:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MBRKnxyOqSg

Police Squad/M Squad comparison.

They did the same thing there. Take some serious B-movie level schlock and make it funny.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 10:13 PM (8O3HH)

227 Ruthless People was the first time I saw Bill Pullman.

Never saw him in another role like the Miami Vice wannabe.


Posted by: Axeman at January 04, 2018 10:12 PM


His best role was in RP. One of the funniest cretin characters ever committed to film.

Posted by: otho at January 04, 2018 10:14 PM (qGuLD)

228 Yeah Bridges of Madison County. Has there ever been a romantic film made about a guy who cheats on his wife because she nags him too much and takes him for granted? Seriously how could anyone think that was a romantic movie. Honey, lets go see a film about how you can cheat on me any time you think I'm not treating you right enough!

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:14 PM (39g3+)

229 Well, I've just had my suspicions confirmed: I saw a coyote just a mile from the house. I've long thought that they must be around here, but now I know it.

The little local deer better be careful....
Posted by: Grey Fox

A few years ago a coyote walked into a downtown Chicago Quiznos and went into the beverage refrigerator. At the time there were photos of people standing there looking at it.

Posted by: nerdygirl

So, one customer liked the squished mouse ads

Posted by: Jean at January 04, 2018 10:14 PM (yM/Yl)

230
A suspect on Police Squad wearing a jacket that had PENN STATE on the back. The next time they showed him it said STATE PEN.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 04, 2018 10:15 PM (IqV8l)

231 I watched Top Secret as a kid and laughed continuously. When I watched it again when was much older, I could only think "Holy shit, how did my parents let me watch this?"

Posted by: SamVonSam at January 04, 2018 10:15 PM (YgGDs)

232 Dad played in a charity golf event & every foursome had a celebrity or pro athelete. When told he was paired w/ Leslie Nielsen Dad asked who she was. Dad said Nielsen was great fun & had great show biz tales.

Posted by: Only in America at January 04, 2018 10:16 PM (bc2Lc)

233 For some reason I get Val Kilmer and Ray Liotta mixed up in my head. Not them personally but roles the were in. I mean, Liotta looks like he took a load of salt from a shotgun to the face but something about him feels similar in acting to Kilmer.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:16 PM (39g3+)

234 Your popcorn has been pissed in.

Posted by: KFM at January 04, 2018 10:16 PM (FdNEK)

235 His best role was in RP. One of the funniest cretin characters ever committed to film.

Posted by: otho at January 04, 2018 10:14 PM (qGuLD)
---
He was so memorable that I watched the credits for his name in the theater.

Posted by: Axeman at January 04, 2018 10:16 PM (vDqXW)

236 Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:11 PM (39g3+)

Been a Val Kilmer fan for a long time. Real Genius is one of my favorites, partly because my older son reminds me of the kid, and Kilmer's character was a very positive influence for an awkward genius.

Gay Perry in Kiss Kiss Bang Bang...

His Doc Holliday was one of the best performances ever.

All of which makes up for his version of Batman. But that was not his fault, really.

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 10:16 PM (bNbo2)

237 Ginger Thursday ONT Compliance Pics

And... nice beaver!

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/948975795195793408

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/948975892667170817

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/948975981921959936

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/948976102718038017

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/948976224461901825

Posted by: kbdabear at January 04, 2018 10:16 PM (eh0Va)

238 214 Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In

Buy travel insurance. Maybe 4-6 policies. Make a potential girlfriend a beneficiary. Mail each one her copy. Much more memorable than flowers.

Not that I ever did that.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at January 04, 2018 10:16 PM (hyuyC)

239 92 Nice beaver!


Posted by: Frank Drebin at January 04, 2018 09:41 PM (FdNEK)



How sexist. We henceforth demand to be called 'vagina skwerls'.

Posted by: Weasel previously know as 'Beaver'. at January 04, 2018 10:16 PM (Cybcm)

240 Also I can't believe no one has yet mentioned the most wonderful half-second of Top Secret: at the end, when Val Kilmer is victorious, and he says something to the girl he has won, and just for a moment, her breasts glow with affection like they have 40 watt light bulbs inside.

Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 10:17 PM (Vb4BV)

241 ugh.. going to bed. Tomorrow I'm buying a gun for my purse.

Posted by: Jewells45 at January 04, 2018 10:17 PM (CNHr1)

242 More Ginger Thursday ONT Compliance Pics

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/948976308893245440

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/948976409996943361

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/948976526728540160

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/948976614548926476

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/948976709428219904

Posted by: kbdabear at January 04, 2018 10:17 PM (eh0Va)

243 Who the hell buys travel insurance?? I mean, WHY??
Posted by: Eleanor
----
Many credit card issuers, as part of the benefits of using the card, have a hefty life insurance policy on the card user, if you are killed while you are traveling and used the card as payment for the means of travel.

Check your card's terms and conditions. You may be surprised.

Posted by: Tonypete at January 04, 2018 10:17 PM (tr2D7)

244 Been a Val Kilmer fan for a long time. Real Genius is one of my favorites, partly because my older son reminds me of the kid, and Kilmer's character was a very positive influence for an awkward genius.

Gay Perry in Kiss Kiss Bang Bang...

His Doc Holliday was one of the best performances ever.

All of which makes up for his version of Batman. But that was not his fault, really.
Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 10:16 PM (bNbo2)

Was not bad as the Saint either...

Posted by: Don Q. at January 04, 2018 10:18 PM (NgKpN)

245 Val Kilmer also killed it as Jim Morrison in Stone's The Doors.

Posted by: Axeman at January 04, 2018 10:18 PM (vDqXW)

246 Oh, and Madmartigan--best part of Willow.

Posted by: Axeman at January 04, 2018 10:18 PM (vDqXW)

247 236 Gay Perry in Kiss Kiss Bang Bang...

Robert Downey Jr's character: So...still gay?
Gay Perry: No, I'm up to my ears in pussy. I just like the name.

Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 10:18 PM (Vb4BV)

248 I have a drinking problem.

AIRPLANE!!! Of course!

Posted by: MathMom at January 04, 2018 10:19 PM (dU+m0)

249 I'd seen the shrieking outraged comments, but hadn't realized what all the fuss was about in Oregon. A friend of mine finally made a post on Facebook that laid it all out -

Apparently Oregon has passed a law that makes it legal to pump your own gasoline at the gas station.

Hilarity, predictably, has ensued.

Posted by: junior at January 04, 2018 10:20 PM (nWA7B)

250 My brother thought Bridges of Madison County was a comedy. A National Geographic photographer, and only taking one lens with his SLR camera to get great pictures! Funny to him.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at January 04, 2018 10:20 PM (hyuyC)

251 All of which makes up for his version of Batman. But that was not his fault, really.

Kilmer did the best he could with what he was given (so did George Clooney, for that matter). Kilmer was completely into that role, he really sold it as Batman but was handed crap as a script by people who really knew nothing of the character or stories. I've never seen him turn in a bad performance, even in a pretty minor role like in Heat. And without him, Tombstone would have flat out sucked.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:20 PM (39g3+)

252 Val Kilmer also killed it as Jim Morrison in Stone's The Doors.
Posted by: Axeman at January 04, 2018 10:18 PM (vDqXW)

Yes. kinda forgot about that one, having only seen it once.

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 10:20 PM (bNbo2)

253 Not having a penis, I don't understand why you'd want to whiten it. Can anyone enlighten me?

Posted by: Miley, the Duchess at January 04, 2018 10:20 PM (cu8/f)

254 Apparently Oregon has passed a law that makes it legal to pump your own gasoline at the gas station.

Yeah the internet is having loads of fun with that, but here actually in Oregon... not particularly a matter of any significance or notice. Its not like nobody has ever traveled out of the state. Most people in Portland have been to Washington State lots of times and pumped their own gas.

But its given people something go goof on, for a while, and forget the crapfest going on in politics.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:21 PM (39g3+)

255 Not having a penis, I don't understand why you'd want to whiten it. Can anyone enlighten me?

Apparently some women are bleaching their er, poop chute too, I have no idea why anyone would do either.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:22 PM (39g3+)

256 https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/948976102718038017

Once again, a friend recognizes one of the babes there.

That's Emily Addison, "actress" (IFYKWIMAITYD), but I never knew she went red head for a while.

You can find her work in the usual places, of course. Some complain about her boobs being too "perfect", too balloon bolt-on looking, not natural.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 10:22 PM (8O3HH)

257
Apparently Oregon has passed a law that makes it legal to pump your own gasoline at the gas station.

Hilarity, predictably, has ensued.
Posted by: junior


https://www.weaselzippers.us/?p=369876

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 04, 2018 10:23 PM (IqV8l)

258 255: when you can't do, you can always present.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at January 04, 2018 10:23 PM (KP5rU)

259 I'll never be over Macho Grande.

Posted by: Sharkman at January 04, 2018 10:23 PM (k2Hcx)

260 253 Not having a penis, I don't understand why you'd want to whiten it. Can anyone enlighten me?
Posted by: Miley, the Duchess at January 04, 2018 10:20 PM (cu8/f)


Of course not. It's ridiculous.


My balls however...

Posted by: eleven at January 04, 2018 10:23 PM (+lOpA)

261 253 Not having a penis, I don't understand why you'd want to whiten it. Can anyone enlighten me?
Posted by: Miley, the Duchess at January 04, 2018 10:20 PM (cu8/f)

As a White Man... uh... no...

Unless its so it glows in the dark?

Posted by: Don Q. at January 04, 2018 10:23 PM (NgKpN)

262 Snoozin' Sessions, the comatose AG who does nothing at all while sleeping the entire time at the Justice Department did nothing again today:

http://tinyurl.com/yaaz5qw2

The Justice Department has launched a new investigation into allegations the Clinton Foundation used "pay to play" politics while Hillary Clinton was Secretary of State, Fox News has confirmed.

Totally somnolent and inactive, that Sessions guy.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:24 PM (39g3+)

263 Not having a penis, I don't understand why you'd want to whiten it. Can anyone enlighten me?
Posted by: Miley, the Duchess
----
Your Grace, I have one and I can't understand it either.

Posted by: Tonypete at January 04, 2018 10:24 PM (tr2D7)

264 Not having a penis, I don't understand why you'd want to whiten it. Can anyone enlighten me?
Posted by: Miley, the Duchess at January 04, 2018 10:20 PM

Can't help you. I like mine whatever hue it was made. Not really sure why you'd want to whiten the willy? I really have no idea why it's a thing.

Posted by: Minnfidel at January 04, 2018 10:24 PM (L3YlV)

265
Val Kilmer was great in Tombstone, Heat, Kill The Irishman and Wonderland. I consider him an excellent actor that brings real character to his roles, but has, for some reason spent most of his career doing less than stellar movies.

Posted by: otho at January 04, 2018 10:24 PM (qGuLD)

266 One of the things I find funniest is how many people in Airplane! (and Zero Hour) had the fish. Fish just isn't that popular.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at January 04, 2018 10:24 PM (oVJmc)

267 >> Apparently some women are bleaching their er, poop chute too, I have no idea why anyone would do either.

----------------

Vulvae too. Well labia majora specifically. And it's not really "whitening", but "pinking". Lightening. Skin in those regions can be darker by a good bit and contrast sharply with the normal skin tone.

The idea is to lighten it, and make it blend in with the surrounding skin.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 10:24 PM (8O3HH)

268 Yeah Bridges of Madison County. Has there ever been a romantic film made about a guy who cheats on his wife because she nags him too much and takes him for granted? Seriously how could anyone think that was a romantic movie. Honey, lets go see a film about how you can cheat on me any time you think I'm not treating you right enough!
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:14 PM

One of my friends and I went to see it and we decided, even before we looked it up, that a guy had written the story. A hot-to-trot Italian slut in the middle of farm country who banged the first guy who showed an interest. Every time she was upset, Eastwood's character offered her a beer or played jazz on the radio. And then the finale: the grown children honor her request to have her ashes sprinkled in the river; half-Italian kids would've sooner flushed Mama down the toilet!

Posted by: NaughtyPine with shifty eyes at January 04, 2018 10:25 PM (G8B7r)

269 Hypocrisy Incarnate: Intolerance for the Intolerant; Excluding the Non-inclusives; Desubjectifying Objectivity

The focus this time: Do unto others...?

http://politicalhat.com/?p=14310

Posted by: The Political Hat at January 04, 2018 10:25 PM (itfg0)

270 Skin in those regions can be darker by a good bit and contrast sharply with the normal skin tone.

Isn't that more a feature than a bug?

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:26 PM (39g3+)

271
One of the things I find funniest is how many people in Airplane! (and Zero Hour) had the fish. Fish just isn't that popular.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles


Always have the lasagna.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 04, 2018 10:26 PM (IqV8l)

272 Not having a penis, I don't understand why you'd want to whiten it.

There are two kinds of people; those that want their peepee whitened, and those that don't know that it is required of them. Training is necessary, and the Social Justice Warriors are just the people to explain it.

Posted by: Skandia Recluse at January 04, 2018 10:26 PM (GroCc)

273 251 yep, in Tombstone he was my huckleberry.

Posted by: vivi at January 04, 2018 10:27 PM (11H2y)

274 One comedy technique that I think ZAZ invented is the "series" joke. They show a joke, and then immediately afterwards show several variations on that joke, each increasing in the level of absurdity.

They do this in all the movies listed above. For example, in Airplane: "Looks like I picked the wrong time of the week to quit (x,y,z)". Also the scene in which they have to calm the hysterical woman, and the people at the back of the line are carrying weapons.

Here is a scene from Naked Gun 2 1/2:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D19nGdtF-Xk

You can see a lot of it in Fistful of Yen. I'm not sure if anyone did this before them.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 04, 2018 10:27 PM (/qEW2)

275
Oh, and those in the Shep Smith/Anderson Cooper/and twink community do the same pinking/lightening for their Johnsons.

I don't think any straight man would do that if you paid him. But maybe some of these millennial young bucks might be into it.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 10:27 PM (8O3HH)

276 Lets have a spelling contest!

Posted by: Doc at January 04, 2018 10:27 PM (FdNEK)

277 never really saw madison county. thought it was a beastiality flick. i saw the sheep and thought no way am i watching that shit. bet her anus wasn't even bleached.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at January 04, 2018 10:27 PM (KP5rU)

278 Not having a penis, I don't understand why you'd want to whiten it. Can anyone enlighten me?

Some are darker in color than the rest of the guy.

Posted by: bonhomme at January 04, 2018 10:28 PM (zGsgt)

279 Kentucky. Fried. Movie.

Posted by: Brother Cavil, this space for rent! Call 1-800-MORON-AD for details! at January 04, 2018 10:28 PM (lLeln)

280 One of the funniest scenes from Naked Gun;

Mayor Barkley; "Oh, Drebin, I don't want any more trouble like you had last year on the south side. Understand? That's my policy"

Drebin; "Yes, well when I see 5 weirdos dressed in togas stabbing a guy in the middle of the park full view of a hundred people, I shoot the bastards. That's MY policy"

Mayor Barkley; "That was a Shakespeare in The Park production of Julius Caesar you moron! You killed 5 actors, good ones!"

Posted by: kbdabear at January 04, 2018 10:28 PM (eh0Va)

281 Joey, do you like movies with gladiators?"
"Joey, ever spend time in a turkish prison?"
"Joey, ever like it when Scraps humps your leg?"
Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 10:03 PM

Joey, you ever seen a grown man naked?

"Say, Scraps is a boy dog."

Posted by: Beartooth at January 04, 2018 10:28 PM (KxxpQ)

282 Oh, and Madmartigan--best part of Willow.
Posted by: Axeman at January 04, 2018 10:18 PM

Yes. His love struck lines were hilarious and so sincere, and the facial expressions! The rest of the movie was meh.

Posted by: NaughtyPine with shifty eyes at January 04, 2018 10:29 PM (G8B7r)

283 ugh.. going to bed. Tomorrow I'm buying a gun for my purse.
Posted by: Jewells45 at January 04, 2018 10:17 PM (CNHr1)

What is your purse afraid of?

Posted by: OneEyedJack at January 04, 2018 10:29 PM (z79tQ)

284 @228 Yeah Bridges of Madison County. Has there ever been a romantic film made about a guy who cheats on his wife because she nags him too much and takes him for granted? Seriously how could anyone think that was a romantic movie. Honey, lets go see a film about how you can cheat on me any time you think I'm not treating you right enough!
-------------------------

That's because if it was for guys, there would be a lot more explosions, and the female lead's husband would turn out to secretly be the bad guy and need to be killed by the male lead in a fit of righteous fury... that segues into the final scene in which the male lead's having sex with the female lead.

Roll credits

Posted by: junior at January 04, 2018 10:30 PM (nWA7B)

285 >> Isn't that more a feature than a bug?

Well, when you're showing it off, you want to look your best......I'm ready for my close-up Mr. DeMille.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 10:30 PM (8O3HH)

286 I love Airplane and Police Squad but Ive never seen Top Secret. Ill watch it this weekend.

Posted by: LASue at January 04, 2018 10:30 PM (hZ+us)

287 Willow was okay, but it didn't buy into its own conceit enough. Conan, Lord of the Rings, they were films that totally sold themselves on this world and the events. Willow and other films like Your Highness always are acting like they think its kind of dumb but they are playing along. It doesn't work.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:31 PM (39g3+)

288 Buy travel insurance. Maybe 4-6 policies. Make a potential girlfriend a beneficiary. Mail each one her copy. Much more memorable than flowers.

Not that I ever did that.
Posted by: NaCly Dog

LOLOLOL!! OK, that's a rationale I can understand!

Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January 04, 2018 10:31 PM (QU+qf)

289 Posted by: Jewells45 at January 04, 2018 10:17 PM (CNHr1)

What is your purse afraid of?
Posted by: OneEyedJack at January 04, 2018 10:29 PM (z79tQ)

I heard Leslie Nielsen read that line.

Might be time to adjourn for the evening.

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 10:31 PM (bNbo2)

290 Not having a penis, I don't understand why you'd want to whiten it. Can anyone enlighten me? --


To make it look smaller.

Posted by: woke brutha joke at January 04, 2018 10:31 PM (z79tQ)

291 Just watched Dunkirk. Is it me, or was that film a steamy pile of moose shit? If you didn't know the story I doubt the movie would have clued you in.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 04, 2018 10:32 PM (aMlLZ)

292 Well, looks like we're going to get above zero for the first time in damn near two weeks on Saturday! Woot! Just got a call from a buddy who has a sled dog team and asked me to go out for some training runs with his teams this weekend. It's going to be magnificent, I know to some people it sounds awful, but it's a shitload of fun.

Posted by: Minnfidel at January 04, 2018 10:32 PM (L3YlV)

293 One of my favorite straight lines from a movie is in Weird Science.

The girls our heroes have always wanted finally are talking to them seriously. One says they have to go into the bathroom to fix their faces.

The kid asks "whats wrong with your face?"

They have no answer. He doesn't know girls and doesn't know code for "we have to take a huge dump" but ends up complimenting them.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:33 PM (39g3+)

294 Probably as close to my take on the whole of the "Bannon-book" thing as anything.

https://twitter.com/HNIJohnMiller/status/949031574217125890

And since it's a Twitter thread I don't have to slowly type it all.

Posted by: geoffb at January 04, 2018 10:33 PM (zOpu5)

295 Fuck , it's cold.

Cold is bad.

Cold and alone is so worse.


Make me laugh, morons.

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 10:34 PM (5Isv3)

296 I heard Leslie Nielsen read that line.

Might be time to adjourn for the evening.
Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 10:31 PM (bNbo2)


Good. It was meant as that kind of one-liner.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at January 04, 2018 10:35 PM (z79tQ)

297 Fuck , it's cold.

Cold is bad.

Cold and alone is so worse.


Make me laugh, morons.


Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 10:34 PM (5Isv3)


If lena dunham was the only company you would swim to the arctic circle to be cold and alone.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 04, 2018 10:35 PM (aMlLZ)

298 Bill Whittle talked about conspiracy theories and the psychological stress of changing your mind about deeply held beliefs. He made the case, in passing, that William Shakespeare did not write his own plays. The short of it being that his verified signatures were as jagged and poorly spelled as an illiterate person might make.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at January 04, 2018 10:35 PM (rnAwa)

299 And since there are Val Kilmer fans here, I must ask: Is "Kill Me Again"a good film? It popped up on the amazon prime videos and I want to watch a movie this weekend.

Posted by: NaughtyPine with shifty eyes at January 04, 2018 10:35 PM (G8B7r)

300 Many credit card issuers, as part of the benefits of using the card, have a hefty life insurance policy on the card user, if you are killed while you are traveling and used the card as payment for the means of travel.

Check your card's terms and conditions. You may be surprised.
Posted by: Tonypete

That's interesting -- I did not know that. However, it is not somethinf I'd be paying extra for -- I don't use cards with annual fees, and I don't carry a monthly balance. My question is, why would you actually BUY such a policy?

Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January 04, 2018 10:35 PM (QU+qf)

301 @228 Yeah Bridges of Madison County. Has there ever been a romantic film made about a guy who cheats on his wife because she nags him too much and takes him for granted?

Berke Breathed did a good Sunday strip about the man's version of Bridges, and after a flowery buildup leads to Steve Dallas typing:

"And out of the truck emerge... three stewardesses."

Opus is looking over Steve's shoulder and hollers ,"Six!"

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 10:36 PM (bNbo2)

302 Make me laugh, morons.
Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 10:34 PM (5Isv3)

*holds up mirror*

how's that?

Posted by: Moron unclear on the concept at January 04, 2018 10:36 PM (z79tQ)

303 Just a simple story of a guy who fell in love with a woman that he met
at a restaurant who turned out to be the daughter of a kidnapped
scientist, only to lose her to her childhood lover who she last saw on a
deserted island, who then turned out fifteen years later to be the
leader of the French underground.
------------------
Everyone always rips off my plot lines!!!

Posted by: zombie sir francis bacon at January 04, 2018 10:36 PM (QCX64)

304 The scene in "Airplane!" in the dive bar where the Girl Scouts get into a fight over a card game - hilarious!

Checking the Radar Range - "Ten more minutes, chief...."

Some guy taking his laundry out of one of the control panels....

When the sh*t literally hits the fan....

I love "Airplane!"......

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, Texas at January 04, 2018 10:37 PM (uDcBt)

305
The Social Justice Nonsense on ESPN doesn't always bother me, but it's been especially annoying tonight. I've been watching college basketball, which is one of the few things they still do a good job with, and one of the commentators, f***ing Walton something or other, has spent like half the broadcast talking about Utah (which I guess is where they are) and how it's such a great place for solar energy experimentation and being progressive in the fight to stop climate change. Which, a) no, and b) shut up and focus on the @#$%ing game already! I've changed it to Cops three or four times to get away from the stupid hippie.
Posted by: T at January 04, 2018 10:11 PM (MmeCn)


Yup. Bill Walton. Ugh.

I'm an Arizona fan and have to watch my 'Cats with the sound turned down when Bill Walton's calling their games. Brain-fried old hippy doesn't know when to STFU, constantly stirs sh*t with the play-by-play guy (who looks like he'd rather be anywhere than doing a game with Bill. He also doesn't GAF how much he doesn't know.

Posted by: Hands at January 04, 2018 10:39 PM (EzdLW)

306 If lena dunham was the only company you would swim to the arctic circle to be cold and alone.
...


I would ignite the closest lightsaber and sleep inside her belly. Like Luke and the Tauntaun.

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 10:39 PM (5Isv3)

307 I would ignite the closest lightsaber and sleep inside her belly. Like Luke and the Tauntaun

She smells even worse... on the inside...

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:41 PM (39g3+)

308 " I thought she smelled bad on the OUTSIDE!"

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 10:41 PM (5Isv3)

309 Boom!
http://thehill.com/homenews/campaign/367541-fbi-launches-new-clinton-foundation-investigation

Posted by: muggs at January 04, 2018 10:42 PM (Sk0w5)

310 Ah, yes, Catholic High School Girls in Trouble.

So, my introduction to KFM was this one time one of the kids from my church youth group (high school age), who's about as straight laced as you might find (now an LCMS pastor), had a party at his house over the holidays of basically our group, minus the adults who usually ran it, and he had heard KFM was like Monty Python and the Holy Grail level funny, so he rented it and we all watched as part of the festivities.

And it was very funny.

Unintentionally.

Posted by: Methos and 81,326 other people want Last Jedi erased from canon at January 04, 2018 10:42 PM (XQvuQ)

311 Ruthless People:

Are you the police?
(15 cops with rifles appear on the roof)
No, we're the National Rifle Association

Posted by: Chuck C at January 04, 2018 10:42 PM (0V2ki)

312 haha!~
warm3r

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 10:42 PM (5Isv3)

313 And since there are Val Kilmer fans here, I must ask: Is "Kill Me Again"a good film? It popped up on the amazon prime videos and I want to watch a movie this weekend.


Posted by: NaughtyPine with shifty eyes at January 04, 2018 10:35 PM

Haven't seen that one. Eh.... it usually doesn't hurt to give a Kilmer film a shot, even if it's only so-so. He's usually good, unless he's phoning it in.

Posted by: otho at January 04, 2018 10:43 PM (qGuLD)

314 Well, looks like we're going to get above zero for the first time in damn near two weeks on Saturday! Woot! Just got a call from a buddy who has a sled dog team and asked me to go out for some training runs with his teams this weekend. It's going to be magnificent, I know to some people it sounds awful, but it's a shitload of fun.
Posted by: Minnfidel at January 04, 2018 10:32 PM (L3YlV)

I think that sounds like LOADS of fun!! (Just as long as you're dressed warmly for it!)

Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January 04, 2018 10:43 PM (QU+qf)

315 213 nerdygirl -- I was working for a chain bookstore when Bridges of Madison County was published. Would you believe people were actually giving this book about adultery to couples as wedding gifts? It was insane! (I am proud to say that I never read a single word of the idiot book.)

Posted by: Deplorable Lady with a Deplorable Basket of Deplorable Cats at January 04, 2018 10:43 PM (T3JzS)

316 The most quotable movie of all time is "The Princess Bride."
E.g. "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."
Or
"Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."

Posted by: Inconceivable! at January 04, 2018 10:45 PM (Rp+oT)

317 Main thing to remember RE: Bridges of Madison County

if she'll leave him to be with you...
she'll leave you to be with the next guy.

You don't have the magic wang that makes them stay. You're not James Bond.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:45 PM (39g3+)

318 That's interesting -- I did not know that. However, it is not somethinf I'd be paying extra for -- I don't use cards with annual fees, and I don't carry a monthly balance. My question is, why would you actually BUY such a policy?
Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January




you know, insurance

Posted by: ---.-./-.--- - at January 04, 2018 10:46 PM (MTjB1)

319 About a decade ago, the great Russian comedian, Maxim Galkin, completely stole the Feel-A-Round skit from Kentucky Fried Movie for his New Year's Eve variety show on Russian TV. (Galkin played the theater attendant.)

I guess he figured that not a lot of Russians would think: "Hey! He's stealing that from a thirty-year-old American comedy movie!"

Posted by: The Arc of History at January 04, 2018 10:47 PM (dlwIY)

320 280 One of the funniest scenes from Naked Gun;

Mayor Barkley; "Oh, Drebin, I don't want any more trouble like you had last year on the south side. Understand? That's my policy"

Drebin; "Yes, well when I see 5 weirdos dressed in togas stabbing a guy in the middle of the park full view of a hundred people, I shoot the bastards. That's MY policy"

Mayor Barkley; "That was a Shakespeare in The Park production of Julius Caesar you moron! You killed 5 actors, good ones!"

Posted by: kbdabear at January 04, 2018 10:28 PM (eh0Va)

It's her emphasis on "Good ones!" that makes it so funny for me.

Posted by: josephistan at January 04, 2018 10:48 PM (ANIFC)

321 if she'll leave him to be with you...
she'll leave you to be with the next guy.

You don't have the magic wang that makes them stay. You're not James Bond.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January




so, who is complaining about her leaving? it is after the adulterous sex though?

Posted by: ---.-./-.--- - at January 04, 2018 10:49 PM (MTjB1)

322 Galkin did change the upcoming attraction in the Feel-A-Round skit from "Deep Throat" to "Texas Chainsaw Massacre".

Posted by: The Arc of History at January 04, 2018 10:49 PM (dlwIY)

323 Mayor Barkley; "That was a Shakespeare in The Park production of Julius Caesar you moron! You killed 5 actors, good ones!"

Posted by: kbdabear at January 04, 2018 10:28 PM (eh0Va)

It's her emphasis on "Good ones!" that makes it so funny for me.
Posted by: josephistan at January 04, 2018 10:48 PM (ANIFC)

Again: serious actors being seriously funny.

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 10:50 PM (bNbo2)

324 You don't have the magic wang that makes them stay.
...


unless, of course you bleach regularly...

Posted by: happy sun, full of fusion at January 04, 2018 10:50 PM (5Isv3)

325
You know, today, I had a round with a stupid prescription for my father. Long story, but they have him taking Belsomra for sleep. They had given him a trail script early, then wrote another one, which was filled on Dec. 18th. For 10 pills. It ran out.

Well, the script was supposed to be for 90. That's what the doctor's office says. But the pharmacy doesn't have it. They have only the script for 10, but can't explain what happened.

Now Belsomra is controlled (only Schedule IV), but still controlled. So the doctor's offfice can't just write another one without an act of Congress or something.

It will be Monday before anyone is there with the authority to do it. And even then they might not.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 10:51 PM (8O3HH)

326 I was working for a chain bookstore when Bridges of Madison County was published. Would you believe people were actually giving this book about adultery to couples as wedding gifts? It was insane!

Hmmm. Now that you mention it, I recall that the person who gave me that book was - myfather-in-law. Yikes -- I wonder if that was a message??

Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January 04, 2018 10:52 PM (QU+qf)

327 Gilbert Gottfried recently interviewed David Zucker on his podcast, and Zucker had some funny stories about making KFM and Airplane. All the old stars on set like Robert Stack and Leslie Nielsen were certain it was going to bomb. And he said he has never seen Airplane 2 because it'd be like watching his daughter get whored out.

Posted by: Brisco_County_Sr at January 04, 2018 10:53 PM (k6NDF)

328 No love here for the Groove Tube? Richard Belzer as the President is a scream.

Posted by: vivi at January 04, 2018 10:53 PM (11H2y)

329 travel insurance imo is just in case we might need medical evacuation or secondary medical emergency treatment

regular health insurance will only pick up a fraction of costs, and accidents are not uncommon for travelers

Posted by: votermom pimping great books! at January 04, 2018 10:54 PM (hMwEB)

330 Gilbert Goddfried's podcast is usually wonderful and brilliant. He's had some truly amazing people on there, and his love of and knowledge of films is plain every time.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:54 PM (39g3+)

331 Drudge has a headline up about general motors getting involved in some animal venture.

Posted by: ---.-./-.--- - at January 04, 2018 10:54 PM (MTjB1)

332 >>>OK, great line from Ruthless People

"they want the pinky ring!!!!! give them the pinky ring!!!"

Posted by: concrete girl at January 04, 2018 10:54 PM (nBzBk)

333 Airplane: Bear babe, slide me a piece of porter. Drink side run the java.

KFM: Rex Kramer part time airline mechanic, full time dare devil.

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at January 04, 2018 10:55 PM (do1hq)

334 With al the great stuff happening to Hillary, Fusion, Huma and Comey, even pissed-in popcorn is going to be in high demand.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at January 04, 2018 10:55 PM (0ecq3)

335 The Groove Tube.

With the talking (unbleached) male genitals.

Posted by: davidt at January 04, 2018 10:55 PM (FdNEK)

336 here it is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OgTzlXdviWk

Posted by: vivi at January 04, 2018 10:57 PM (11H2y)

337 My favourite bit from all those movies is not even a one-liner. It's when they are crawling into the base and up to a pair of jackboots--empty.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at January 04, 2018 10:57 PM (0ecq3)

338 Evenin Horde of Ol Fashioned Layering.........

Couple of things....

Since Ol Val Kilmer is on the mind....what did y'all think of him in The Saint?

And......what's y'alls opinion on battery powered Heated garments?
You know, heated socks, jackets, etc......

I haven't tried any of those clothes in many years, frankly the old tech sucked.....but I reckon with tech advances....the results should be far more proficient.

Saw a Dewalt and Milwaukee battery powered Heated jacket and thought....If power tool companies are in on this tech, well....maybe it ACTUALLY works well....

Anyone with first hand feedback?

Posted by: Hillbillyking at January 04, 2018 10:57 PM (JGzeX)

339 Sure looks like I picked a bad week to come to the ONT!

Posted by: kbdabear at January 04, 2018 10:57 PM (eh0Va)

340 The whiter the penis, the....

Having trouble finishing that.

The easier it is to find in the dark?

Posted by: Splunge at January 04, 2018 10:57 PM (Vb4BV)

341 Thank you for the bleaching feedback. I guess it's just moar crazy.

Posted by: Miley, the Duchess at January 04, 2018 10:58 PM (cu8/f)

342 With al the great stuff happening to Hillary, Fusion, Huma and Comey, even pissed-in popcorn is going to be in high demand.
Posted by: Dirks Strewn at January 04, 2018 10:55 PM (0ecq3)

I really love to think that anything will come of all this. I really do.

But I bet little, if anything, will happen, aside from a handful of token perp-walks featuring mid-level operatives.

The denizens of the swamp appear to be immune to flame throwers.

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 10:59 PM (bNbo2)

343 "and this is Dejavu."

'Monsieur, have we not met before?

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at January 04, 2018 10:59 PM (0ecq3)

344 Since Ol Val Kilmer is on the mind....what did y'all think of him in The Saint?

Nothing about that movie worked for me, but I can't really say I ever liked the character, even when Roger Moore played him. I read a couple of the books but was not impressed.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:59 PM (39g3+)

345
337 My favourite bit from all those movies is not even a one-liner. It's when they are crawling into the base and up to a pair of jackboots--empty.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn

In "Top Secret" that is.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at January 04, 2018 11:00 PM (0ecq3)

346 The whiter the penis, the bigger the rhesus

Posted by: ---.-./-.--- - at January 04, 2018 11:00 PM (MTjB1)

347 No love here for the Groove Tube? Richard Belzer as the President is a scream.

Also starring Chevy Chase's dick. Seriously. There is a dick scene.

Posted by: Weirddave at January 04, 2018 11:01 PM (Nyyc4)

348 'Night, Horde.

Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down at January 04, 2018 11:02 PM (bNbo2)

349 In women's tennis I always root against the heterosexual.

Posted by: Zombie Janet Reno at January 04, 2018 11:02 PM (sXefu)

350 DavidT@10:55: I seem to remember a KFM-like movie called The Boob Tube; is that the one? I remember a newscaster in it talking about some situation in Asia and one of the cities involved was called Suk Muk Dik.

I may be misremembering the name. At any rate, it was similar to a Zucker Brothers movie, but I don't think it was made by them.

Posted by: Prothonotary Warbler at January 04, 2018 11:02 PM (wSC8T)

351 none of these movies have the comedy of yahoos' home page. that shit is hilarious. had no idea the onion bought them out.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at January 04, 2018 11:03 PM (KP5rU)

352 325 publius-- I take Xanax and welbutrin, and have been for years. Every time I need a refill, my doctor has to write a new prescription. His office is pretty good about the welbutrin, but just about every time I have to either call or send nasty grams to get my xanax. I always make sure I order a refill a week in advance just to avoid the problems your father is experiencing. (No xanax, no sleep. Brain refuses to switch off. And, boy, am I cranky the next day.)

Posted by: Deplorable Lady with a Deplorable Basket of Deplorable Cats at January 04, 2018 11:03 PM (T3JzS)

353 My question is, why would you actually BUY such a policy?

Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January 04, 2018 10:35 PM (QU+qf)

++++

It was one of the plot element in Airport. The bomber bought travel insurance, at the airport iirc, for his flight. His reason was he was going to blow himself and the plane with him to get money for his wife, though I don't imagine that would be a reason the insurance companies would approve of.

That movie was from the 70's and the book it was based on was published in the 60's. Maybe they stopped selling travel insurance in airports, because I can't recall ever seeing a place to buy it there.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at January 04, 2018 11:03 PM (pvjTE)

354
You don't have the magic wang that makes them stay. You're not James Bond.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor


Paolo has the magic wang.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 04, 2018 11:03 PM (IqV8l)

355 The whiter the penis, the greater her keenness

Posted by: ---.-./-.--- - at January 04, 2018 11:03 PM (MTjB1)

356 Groove tube. Boob tube is an entirely different (and awful) film.

Posted by: Weirddave at January 04, 2018 11:03 PM (Nyyc4)

357 Val Kilmer stole most of Tombstone. Powers Booth stole the rest.

Posted by: kbdabear at January 04, 2018 11:03 PM (eh0Va)

358 watching the stupid abc waco thing.
if it was the intent of abc to have the atf and the media look good, they have failed miserably.

Posted by: concrete girl at January 04, 2018 11:04 PM (nBzBk)

359 >> Thank you for the bleaching feedback.

There's a joke in there somewhere, but I can't think of it.

And again, the only dudes doing that are the type that don't like girls, I'm pretty sure.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 11:04 PM (8O3HH)

360 Got it. I thought The Boob Tube was funny, but I was also, like seven the only time I saw it.

Posted by: Prothonotary Warbler at January 04, 2018 11:05 PM (wSC8T)

361 Thank you for the bleaching feedback.

There's a joke in there somewhere, but I can't think of it.

And again, the only dudes doing that are the type that don't like girls, I'm pretty sure.
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January




really? you don't think married couples in lib strongholds will be getting his and hers bleaching packages? How would some respectable girl with a freshly bleached ass let someone with an unbleached wang anywhere near her?

Posted by: ---.-./-.--- - at January 04, 2018 11:06 PM (MTjB1)

362 as usual, i haven't seen *any* of the movies all y'all are talking about.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 04, 2018 11:06 PM (JTKl5)

363 354
You don't have the magic wang that makes them stay. You're not James Bond.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor

Paolo has the magic wang.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 04, 2018 11:03 PM (IqV8l)

My line, you have stolen it. Just as The Paolo has stolen your wife.

Posted by: The Paolo at January 04, 2018 11:06 PM (ANIFC)

364 I think ace has been sitting on the "Penis Whitier" line for years waiting for an opportunity to use it.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:07 PM (39g3+)

365 362 as usual, i haven't seen *any* of the movies all y'all are talking about.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 04, 2018 11:06 PM (JTKl5)

you must be a young un

Posted by: votermom pimping great books! at January 04, 2018 11:08 PM (hMwEB)

366 So......not funny, but bridges was filmed in Madison County Iowa(where my grandfather and John Wayne are from). It was quite the scandal to find a place to film it. Everyone turned them down.....finally found an empty farmhouse whose family was willing to let them use it.

How in the hell did the subject of bridges even come up?

And.......Airplane for the win! Joey, have you ever seen a grown man naked?

Posted by: westminsterdogshow........GNAMM ette at January 04, 2018 11:09 PM (mMeIQ)

367 How would some respectable girl with a freshly bleached ass...
---
not sure, but that might be mutually exclusive sets you're talking about.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 04, 2018 11:09 PM (JTKl5)

368 "You idiot. What the fuk are we going to do with a $2,000,000 laser?!"

"How 'bout we bleach some dicks? Obamacare covers it."

"OK, I'll handle the laser, and you...restrain the subject."

"Do you think they'll notice the 40 % shrinkage?"

This has all the makings of a superhero origin story.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at January 04, 2018 11:10 PM (0ecq3)

369 How would some respectable girl with a freshly bleached ass...
---
not sure, but that might be mutually exclusive sets you're talking about.
Posted by: redc1c4 at January




.-.. --- .-..

Posted by: ---.-./-.--- - at January 04, 2018 11:11 PM (MTjB1)

370 >> Every time I need a refill, my doctor has to write a new prescription.

You know, I learned something. FOr everything up to Sch II, they can electronically send it to the pharmacy. My own doc does that. But for Sch II (this is the strong opioids basically), it has to be written.

But sometimes they don't want to do, aren't set up, or just don't and make them do written.

It's going to get worse and more of a hassle with the crackdown on opioid abuse.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 11:11 PM (8O3HH)

371
watching the stupid abc waco thing.

if it was the intent of abc to have the atf and the media look good, they have failed miserably.

Posted by: concrete girl at January 04, 2018 11:04 PM (nBzBk)


You can thank me later.

Posted by: Zombie Janet Reno at January 04, 2018 11:11 PM (sXefu)

372 you must be a young un

Posted by: votermom pimping great books! at January 04, 2018 11:08 PM (hMwEB)
---
no, just sheltered. i didn't get out much as a kid/teen, and what i did get to see was *very* restricted.

since then, i've never been much into going to the theater, mostly because traffic, cost and asshole audiences here in Lost Angels, and i almost never watch the vidiot, even though we have Dish TV.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 04, 2018 11:12 PM (JTKl5)

373 How does Pat Proft fit into the canon? He does not seem to be able to handle solo projects well, but he has collaborated on several good ZAZ projects.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 04, 2018 11:12 PM (/qEW2)

374 Waco and Ruby Ridge were some of the most outrageously evil things I've ever seen the US Government do and that includes the Indian wars and testing diseases on black populations. Inconceivable that they did it and basically got away with it all, with the press desperately covering for them.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:13 PM (39g3+)

375 Britches of Madwomen County

Posted by: votermom pimping great books! at January 04, 2018 11:13 PM (hMwEB)

376 Maybe they stopped selling travel insurance in airports, because I can't recall ever seeing a place to buy it there.

There was a joke concerning this on Barney Miller.
IIRC, Wojo was afraid of flying. Yamana gives him a few bucks and asks him to buy insurance on himself with Yamana as the beneficiary. Wojo is shocked that Yamana would be betting on his death. Yamana's response: Have I ever hit on a longshot?

Posted by: Chuck C at January 04, 2018 11:13 PM (0V2ki)

377 201 Yeah if you watch the voiceover for Airplane, the Zuckers explain how Graves just did not get what the hell was going on, and Stack caught on immediately. He basically steered Graves along and had a great time. Not all of the straight actors the hired were in on the joke.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 10:08 PM (39g3+)

It's his show now, he's in charge. The Big Cheese, the Head Honcho, Numero Uno

Posted by: Rex Kramer at January 04, 2018 11:13 PM (eh0Va)

378 342 The denizens of the swamp appear to be immune to flame throwers.

Yeah, I agree 100%. They could produce a video of Hilary handing over the 20% of American plutonium and she would still slide. As long as the perp has a (D) behind their name, they are totally immune.

Posted by: Deplorable Lady with a Deplorable Basket of Deplorable Cats at January 04, 2018 11:14 PM (T3JzS)

379 Posted by: Miley, the Duchess at January 04, 2018 10:58

Hi Miley,
Good to see you again. Happy New Year.
T

Posted by: Farmer at January 04, 2018 11:14 PM (yJ1e6)

380
Again, I think Jim Comey bleaches his ass. And his dick.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 11:15 PM (8O3HH)

381 when you buy a plane ticket online the site offers travel insurance as an addon

I'm guessing when you buy a ticket at the airport they might offer it too automatically

Posted by: votermom pimping great books! at January 04, 2018 11:15 PM (hMwEB)

382 The Sean Spicier twitter is funny and especially because a bunch of eejits think it's really Sean Spicers account. This tweet is great
https://tinyurl.com/y9q8cfv2

Maybe someone should tell Sezzzzzions that Hillary has a bunch of weed. LOL!

Posted by: keena at January 04, 2018 11:16 PM (RiTnx)

383 When it comes to cutting edge comedy nowadays, the only Zucker worthy of note is Jeff.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 04, 2018 11:16 PM (/qEW2)

384 So um like if the Big One hits California will it like do anything to Oregon? It's a different state. So.

Posted by: Sam Andreas, Snowflake 2nd Class, Beta Male Corps., Corvallis Section at January 04, 2018 11:17 PM (qYCgM)

385 378: hillary could bludgeon newborns on satans' altar and, all we'd here is courage, womens rights bullshit from the alphabets. they are fucking evil.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at January 04, 2018 11:17 PM (KP5rU)

386 Why you never carry a clip mic into the bathroom

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pdE83FX-Mto

Posted by: kbdabear at January 04, 2018 11:17 PM (eh0Va)

387 So um like if the Big One hits California will it like do anything to Oregon? It's a different state. So./i]

The San Andreas fault goes out to see around San Francisco and doesn't go anywhere near Oregon. But its not impossible that a really huge earthquake could be caused by something that also triggers other fault lines, and that could cause eruptions and quakes in Oregon.

Several mountains in Oregon an Washington are still active, if quiet, volcanoes like Hood and Rainier. Those two erupting would cause inconceivable damage to both states.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:19 PM (39g3+)

388 "Val Kilmer stole most of Tombstone....."

He was quite good in "Thunderheart"

Posted by: Tuna at January 04, 2018 11:19 PM (jm1YL)

389 146 IT'S ENRICO PALAZZO!
Posted by: Pug Mahon in the Upside Down
________

My elderly father has a sense of humor that barely tops out above zero. But say that line to him, and he'll start laughing.

Posted by: Furious George at January 04, 2018 11:19 PM (2Omzf)

390 Chris Taylor skates right on the Barrel's mouth!

Posted by: votermom pimping great books! at January 04, 2018 11:19 PM (hMwEB)

391 You know, I learned something. FOr everything up to Sch II, they can electronically send it to the pharmacy. My own doc does that. But for Sch II (this is the strong opioids basically), it has to be written.

But sometimes they don't want to do, aren't set up, or just don't and make them do written.

It's going to get worse and more of a hassle with the crackdown on opioid abuse.
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 11:11 PM (8O3HH)

---------

I take generic Ambien (Zolpidem) to sleep. I see a Doc in the Box nearby for this, because $50/visit. I have to fill said 90 day prescriptions about 10 miles away because apparently said doc is on a DEA list and those pharamcies close to him will not fill his prescriptions.

Sucks.

Posted by: Side draft at January 04, 2018 11:21 PM (Inw/M)

392 My dick is so bright women are like:

https://media.giphy.com/media/26BRq3yxyHFAt9AYw/giphy.gif

Posted by: BourbonChicken at January 04, 2018 11:21 PM (rnAwa)

393 Airplane is quite a faithful remake of a crappy movie called Zero Hour!

Posted by: steevy at January 04, 2018 11:21 PM (LiyEm)

394 4m11s

Posted by: RM at January 04, 2018 11:21 PM (eP+dt)

395 >>>Barney Miller

pot brownie episode

Posted by: concrete girl at January 04, 2018 11:21 PM (nBzBk)

396 Nah something about my addons for Chrome auto-fixes open tags for some reason.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:22 PM (39g3+)

397 326 I was working for a chain bookstore when Bridges of Madison County was published. Would you believe people were actually giving this book about adultery to couples as wedding gifts? It was insane!

Hmmm. Now that you mention it, I recall that the person who gave me that book was - myfather-in-law. Yikes -- I wonder if that was a message??

Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January 04, 2018 10:52 PM (QU+qf)


It's kinda how people play Billy Idol's "White Wedding" at wedding receptions, despite the song belittling the idea of marriage.

Posted by: The Political Hat at January 04, 2018 11:22 PM (itfg0)

398 good night horde

Posted by: votermom pimping great books! at January 04, 2018 11:22 PM (hMwEB)

399 e

Posted by: RM at January 04, 2018 11:22 PM (eP+dt)

400 It's his show now, he's in charge. The Big Cheese, the Head Honcho, Numero Uno
Posted by: Rex Kramer at January 04, 2018 11:13 PM (eh0Va)

That was actually Shat as Buck Murdoch.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at January 04, 2018 11:22 PM (AySfS)

401 So um like if the Big One hits California will it like do anything to Oregon? It's a different state. So.
Posted by: Sam Andreas, Snowflake 2nd Class, Beta Male Corps., Corvallis Section at January 04, 2018 11:17 PM (qYCgM)


Supposedly, everything West of I-5 is predicted to be toast if one of the Juan de Fuca plate faults lets go.

Posted by: Kindltot at January 04, 2018 11:23 PM (2K6fY)

402 those are some classic movies. i think i only saw the first top gun and the two airplanes.

Airplane! was the best.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 04, 2018 11:23 PM (/Ioag)

403 370 -- yeah, my doc's office can just fax a refill order for all my other meds, but both the Welbutrin and Xanax need special handling. Can be down right annoying on occasion. At least these days I can just email his office instead of going through the whole automated phone nonsense.

Posted by: Deplorable Lady with a Deplorable Basket of Deplorable Cats at January 04, 2018 11:24 PM (T3JzS)

404 393 Airplane is quite a faithful remake of a crappy movie called Zero Hour!

Posted by: steevy at January 04, 2018 11:21 PM (LiyEm)


They actually bought the rights to Zero Hour and many of the lines are actually the same... at least on paper.

Posted by: Surely, I'm Hat at January 04, 2018 11:24 PM (itfg0)

405 If the Cascadia Fault goes (which might be the same as Juan de F1uckyo), then, yeah, a lot of lattes are going to be extra salty.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 04, 2018 11:24 PM (/Ioag)

406 Hey everybody.

Oh man what a day.

First, my boss at my job has officially entered B-word territory, and she's already close to C-word status.

Second, my PC has been alternately throwing tantrums a la Glenn Close/Fatal Attraction ("I'M NOT GOING TO BE IGNORED!!") and just not working at all, so I decided it was time to migrate my Microsoft 365 programs over to my Mac.

MISTAKE. I went ahead and bought another subscription at Microsoft's site.

SURPRISE! After spending 70 hard-earned bucks, It turns out that all I managed to do was ADD another year to the subscription that's chained to the failing PC. I finally reached a woman in live chat at Microsoft, and she was very kind and patient, but informed me my only real recourse is to either (a) buy Microsoft Office Home Edition, so I can have installs on up to 5 PCs or Macs (way more than I need), or deactivate my PC subscription and reactivate it on my Mac.

Well, I had been seeing I had a subscription on my PC, so I went looking for that setting in the Microsoft account website. ANOTHER SURPRISE! NOW ALL OF A SUDDEN, Microsoft REFUSES TO ACKNOWLEDGE MY PC SUBSCRIPTION EVER EXISTED. Except, of course, to tell me I can't install anything on my Mac.

So now my only recourse is to spend another 100 bucks, when it looks like the odds are about 5-to-1 I'm gonna get my ass canned tomorrow.

Really beginning to understand the white-hot hatred a lot of folks have for Gates & Co.

Posted by: qdpsteve at January 04, 2018 11:25 PM (eMKNe)

407
Oh, here's another very flexible girl:

https://preview.tinyurl.com/ybj7gtz3

I'm gonna call that NSFW. She's wearing an itty bitty bikini and I can't see any naughty bits, but still. When watching that, any straight man (or lesbo) is not going to be having pure thoughts at all.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 11:26 PM (8O3HH)

408 One comment and outta here.

Concrete girl, whatever you do, do NOT go to utube and watch Waco: Rules of Engagement.

Love each other fellow babies

Posted by: teej at January 04, 2018 11:26 PM (BN/jk)

409 It's kinda how people play Billy Idol's "White Wedding" at wedding receptions,

I've mentioned here before that my cousin's wedding reception got Bizarre Love Triangle on their playlist.

The one about Ian Curtis's love life.

Talk about a jinx.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 04, 2018 11:26 PM (/Ioag)

410 I just woke up to say good-night, Rons and Ronettes!

Posted by: NaughtyPine with shifty eyes at January 04, 2018 11:26 PM (G8B7r)

411 Not whitening, but a fluorescent arrow, so at 2AM, one doesn't "paint" the floor, wall, tank, attempting bowl acquisition......

Posted by: some rat in the swamp at January 04, 2018 11:27 PM (LOq4H)

412 "One comedy technique that I think ZAZ invented is the "series" joke.
They show a joke, and then immediately afterwards show several
variations on that joke, each increasing in the level of absurdity.
"

not to be disagreeable, but what you're talking about is called the "running gag" and it was actually a staple of the Marx Brothers' movies.

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 11:29 PM (ITvKk)

413 409 It's kinda how people play Billy Idol's "White Wedding" at wedding receptions,

I've mentioned here before that my cousin's wedding reception got Bizarre Love Triangle on their playlist.

The one about Ian Curtis's love life.

Talk about a jinx.
Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 04, 2018 11:26 PM (/Ioag)

Ex Wife had 'Rebel without a Clue' by Bonnie Tyler played at our wedding...

Should have taken it as a sign...

Posted by: Don Q. at January 04, 2018 11:29 PM (NgKpN)

414 PDT just branded Bannon as "Sloppy Steve" in his latest tweet. I think it was Rush who said that once PDT brands you you're stuck with the name forever.

Posted by: Tuna at January 04, 2018 11:29 PM (jm1YL)

415 412 "One comedy technique that I think ZAZ invented is the "series" joke.
They show a joke, and then immediately afterwards show several
variations on that joke, each increasing in the level of absurdity.
"

not to be disagreeable, but what you're talking about is called the "running gag" and it was actually a staple of the Marx Brothers' movies.

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 11:29 PM (ITvKk)

The Aristocrats....

Posted by: Don Q. at January 04, 2018 11:29 PM (NgKpN)

416 "Sloppy Steve"? Hey, that's MY real-life nic!! :-P

Posted by: qdpsteve at January 04, 2018 11:30 PM (eMKNe)

417 So has anyone dropped the mainstream sources and gone w/ Roku and Hulu?

We got Hulu because I wanted FNC, do any others carry it?

We are saving about $65 a month.

Posted by: Farmer at January 04, 2018 11:30 PM (yJ1e6)

418 ok i won't

Posted by: concrete girl at January 04, 2018 11:31 PM (nBzBk)

419 Again, I think Jim Comey bleaches his ass. And his dick.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 11:15 PM (8O3HH)
---

AND his hard drives...

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 04, 2018 11:31 PM (JTKl5)

420 Night all. Thanks for keeping me company this super frigid evening. (A sleeping husband, two sleeping dogs, and two sleeping cats are not what I would call company.)

Posted by: Deplorable Lady with a Deplorable Basket of Deplorable Cats at January 04, 2018 11:31 PM (T3JzS)

421 We're getting really close to dumping all cable TV right now. Its kind of a tricky move because tv/internet/telephone are all bundled for a pretty good deal but the price keeps going up and up and up on it, and its getting difficult to justify.

The thing is, right now, its cheaper than getting me a cell phone just so I can chat with mom every day. But if they keep raising the price -- which probably will happen without net neutrality -- then I might look into a cheapo phone that you buy minutes for.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:32 PM (39g3+)

422 Joey, have you ever seen a grown man naked?

Posted by: George Tirebiter at January 04, 2018 11:32 PM (/zyrl)

423 I think Jim Comey bleaches his ass

He might have Chuck Schumer do that for him iykwim

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 04, 2018 11:32 PM (/Ioag)

424 407
Oh, here's another very flexible girl:

https://preview.tinyurl.com/ybj7gtz3

I'm gonna call that NSFW. She's wearing an itty bitty bikini and I can't see any naughty bits, but still. When watching that, any straight man (or lesbo) is not going to be having pure thoughts at all.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 11:26 PM (8O3HH)

++++

Kinda neat how she plants her ass on top of her own head. I guess that would make the Around the World a much shorter trip.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at January 04, 2018 11:33 PM (FUu/Z)

425 My favorite comedies in no particular order include Midnight Run, Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, Butch Cassidy, The Sting, The Pink Panther, Mash, Ferris Buehler, Every Which Way But Loose, The Heartbreak Kid...

Different strokes for different folks.

Posted by: RM at January 04, 2018 11:33 PM (eP+dt)

426 I missed it... did Franken actually resign? Or is he still "delaying" it?

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:33 PM (39g3+)

427 To everyone fawning over Kilmer in 'Tombstone':

'Wyatt Earp' was the superior film, with Dennis Quaid's Doc Holiday in a superior performance.

That is all.

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 11:33 PM (ITvKk)

428 I don't understand why Bill Pullman didn't get more roles. He was great in Spaceballs and he was great in Independence Day (the first one, the good one). Is he a Republican?

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 04, 2018 11:35 PM (/Ioag)

429 >> guess that would make the Around the World a much shorter trip.

You wouldn't have to move much at all.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 11:35 PM (8O3HH)

430 My favorite comedies in no particular order include

... not Life Of Brian, Holy Grail, Galaxy Quest, Blazing F"35ing Saddles...??

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 04, 2018 11:36 PM (/Ioag)

431 My fave KFM sketch?

"Zinc Oxide and You."

Posted by: qdpsteve at January 04, 2018 11:37 PM (eMKNe)

432 417: Farmer, went to roku years ago. Never missed cable. Gave up on Fox News years ago. Helps my blood pressure. If Ace, J.J., or Vic don't cover it, I don't need it.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at January 04, 2018 11:37 PM (KP5rU)

433 Running gag? You want a running gag?
There are running gags in Funny Thing Happened
(Buster Keaton has the good one. He's actually running).
And that's by Plautus, died 184 BC.

Although I think Funny Thing is really a zany remake of a completely straight play of the time, Zero Hour Happened on The Way to The Forum.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at January 04, 2018 11:38 PM (H5rtT)

434 And of course, if nobody has mentioned it yet, David Zucker gave us the greatest political ad of all time...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ixiYZ9DPk8o

Posted by: Paul at January 04, 2018 11:38 PM (H7dia)

435 Franken is out, replaced by some reliable hack, the Dems really do this better.

Posted by: CM9000 at January 04, 2018 11:39 PM (PvK0J)

436 I liked Wyatt Earp as a more historically accurate film, but... it was really aimless and long. It should have been a miniseries or something, not a 4 hour eyeball crusher. I liked Quaid as holiday (and he was probably more accurate to the character) but Kilmer's performance was truly riveting.

In all honesty, Doc Holliday was all rep. The only person he killed that anyone knows of is in that one gun battle near the Corral. He was dying and didn't give a damn, so I think that intimidated people, but he never was a killer, not like Hardin or Hickock.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:39 PM (39g3+)

437 say what you will about Last Action Hero, it did give us the definitive edition of Hamlet (apart from the Klingon) -

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Z9Ismh1elM

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 04, 2018 11:40 PM (/Ioag)

438 Also, Funny Thing Happened has some "Aristocrats" in it!

Posted by: Stringer Davis at January 04, 2018 11:41 PM (H5rtT)

439 Um thanks. Also was wondering if I buy and sell weed using bitcoin do I have to include it on my taxes.

Posted by: Sam Andreas, Snowflake 2nd Class, Beta Male Corps., Corvallis Section at January 04, 2018 11:41 PM (qYCgM)

440 I missed it... did Franken actually resign? Or is he still "delaying" it?
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:33

Scumbag actually resigned. Lisa Smith was sworn in w/ the new Congress from MN.

Posted by: Farmer at January 04, 2018 11:42 PM (yJ1e6)

441 I loved Last Action Hero, I think its a classic. Just audiences weren't ready for the story or in on the idea.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:42 PM (39g3+)

442 Doesn't anybody love me anymore?!?!?!?!?!?

Posted by: qdpsteve at January 04, 2018 11:43 PM (eMKNe)

443 I've never seen any of those movies.

Don't plan to, either. Not my cuppa.

Posted by: GnuBreed at January 04, 2018 11:44 PM (0ogQG)

444
Doesn't anybody love me anymore?!?!?!?!?!?

Posted by: qdpsteve at January 04, 2018 11:43 PM (eMKNe)
---

what do you mean, "anymore"?

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 04, 2018 11:45 PM (JTKl5)

445 BTW, David Yancey (R) has won the tied-vote race for a Virginia House seat I just saw on Twitter. Don't know if it was the coin toss or similar.

Posted by: andycanuck at January 04, 2018 11:45 PM (QCX64)

446 Doesn't anybody love me anymore?!?!?!?!?!?

We'll always have Lace Wigs

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:46 PM (39g3+)

447 #445 Addendum: District 94.

Posted by: andycanuck at January 04, 2018 11:46 PM (QCX64)

448 Doesn't anybody love me anymore?!?!?!?!?!?

Posted by: qdpsteve at January 04, 2018 11:43 PM (eMKNe)
---
you pay short time, you get short time!

you heah fo hour aready... you go NOW!

Posted by: Thai Bleach Boi at January 04, 2018 11:46 PM (JTKl5)

449 Scumbag actually resigned. Lisa Smith was sworn in w/ the new Congress from MN.
Posted by: Farmer at January 04, 2018 11:42 PM (yJ1e6)

'----

Scumbag waited it out until his Congressional pension was secured. Fcuk him.

Posted by: Side draft at January 04, 2018 11:47 PM (Inw/M)

450 Don't know if it was the coin toss or similar.

Posted by: andycanuck at January 04, 2018 11:45 PM (QCX64)
---
they drew his name out of the basket or whatever.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 04, 2018 11:48 PM (JTKl5)

451 I don't think congress should HAVE a pension. No retirement at all. You serve, you get out. But good luck getting THAT passed by the very people who benefit from it.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:48 PM (39g3+)

452 @387 Several mountains in Oregon an Washington are still active, if quiet, volcanoes like Hood and Rainier. Those two erupting would cause inconceivable damage to both states.
----------------

Or Mt. St. Helens.

*cough*

Note that the area around Mt. St. Helens has been closed off to hikers at least once since the eruption in 1980.

Posted by: junior at January 04, 2018 11:48 PM (nWA7B)

453 It is the capstone of Al Franken's comic career that when he actually leaves the Senate, people continue to ask if he has resigned yet. That's impact.

This shoulc become a regular feature, like the old Abe Vigods life-watch.
"It's May the Thirrd. Has Franken retired yet?" Suitable salute to the SOB.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at January 04, 2018 11:48 PM (H5rtT)

454 canuck.....they pulled the winning ticket out of a hat. Old Virginia law

Posted by: westminsterdogshow........GNAMM ette at January 04, 2018 11:48 PM (mMeIQ)

455 Okay, well at least now I know this thing is on... ;-)

Posted by: qdpsteve at January 04, 2018 11:49 PM (eMKNe)

456 Posted by: Thai Bleach Boi

You no listen to that twink.

I love you long time. 50 dolla.

Posted by: Ladyboy Pul Mai Kok at January 04, 2018 11:49 PM (8O3HH)

457 Trip insurance, worth every penny.

Last January, no less than seven cruise ship arrivals were disrupted on four different arrival days & times, due to the USCG and the Port of Galveston being closed to traffic, due to heavy fog.

Both a Carnival and Royal Caribbean ship "enjoyed" two extra days at sea, due to these delays. The rest were all delayed by a single day.

Imagine now, if you will, the thousands of busted airline connections, missed flights, shattered wedding plans, critical business meetings that fell through.

That's a whole lot of money needing to be spent, just to get back home, by folks who didn't budget those funds.

Trip insurance covers the direct costs of new airline tickets, rental cars, hotels if needed, to complete the trip.

Some trip insurance policies even reimburse for lost work days, as well as provable costs due to say, rental for a reception hall for a wedding that didn't happen because of the delay.

Trip insurance isn't "life insurance", like the old "flight insurance" they used to sell from the airport kiosks and vending machines.

If you're going to fly during the ice n' snow seasons, or make more complex plans such as a cruise, tour or "all inclusive" down to Cancun or such.

*Always* buy the Trip Insurance. It's cheap. And if you die in Cancun, it pays the tens of thousands of dollars to get your carcass home, too.

Don' know if it covers eating the spoiled fish on the Airplane, though.



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX


Posted by: Jim at January 04, 2018 11:50 PM (QzJWU)

458 Oh no Ladyboy, I'm not making THAT mistake.
Again.

Posted by: qdpsteve at January 04, 2018 11:50 PM (eMKNe)

459 "Airplane!", for sure. I was awesome!

Posted by: Otto at January 04, 2018 11:50 PM (S6ArX)

460 Scumbag waited it out until his Congressional pension was secured.

I believe the term that best describes Franken is 'goniff'.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 04, 2018 11:50 PM (/Ioag)

461 It's a little disconcerting when you realize most Thai ladyboys are far better looking, more cultured and well-mannered than most real women here in SoCal... :-P

Posted by: qdpsteve at January 04, 2018 11:51 PM (eMKNe)

462 Lefties loooove Franken because he basically read Talking Points Memo and sites like that -- the comments, not the articles -- and would spew that nonsense in hearings. He'd come off looking idiotic, but was too dim and shallow to know it.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:51 PM (39g3+)

463 Scumbag waited it out until his Congressional pension was secured. Fcuk him.

Posted by: Side draft at January 04, 2018 11:47 PM (Inw/M)
---
but of course he did...

we need an Amendment prohibiting pensions for elected federal positions, plus pay them maybe O-3 pay, and make them stay in barracks type housing while in DC, using public transportation to get around.

take away the glamour and the perks, and we'd have fewer life-time seat holders.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 04, 2018 11:51 PM (JTKl5)

464 Franken was already a celebrity so his taking the pension was just greed.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 04, 2018 11:52 PM (/Ioag)

465
I don't think congress should HAVE a pension. No retirement at all. You serve, you get out. But good luck getting THAT passed by the very people who benefit from it.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor


Exactly why there will never be term limits.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 04, 2018 11:52 PM (IqV8l)

466 >> Oh no Ladyboy, I'm not making THAT mistake.

Your mistake was giving xher the reach around. It's like a quantum thing. If you don't make a measurement, you don't know, and it could be a real girl.

Schrodinger's Tranny.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at January 04, 2018 11:52 PM (8O3HH)

467 Robert Stack with that cool, super-smooth move taking off his sunglasses .... to reveal more sunglasses.

I swear, when I first saw CSI-Miami and the lead guy (Caruso?) kept pulling that same slick move in total seriousness, I cracked up. You'd think after Airplane! no one would ever do it again.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 04, 2018 11:53 PM (0jtPF)

468 Lisa Smith was sworn in w/ the new Congress from MN.

I bet Joe Biden was crushed that he wasn't there to grope any tween daughters.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:53 PM (39g3+)

469 @427.....

Kilmers Doc was more "entertainin"......Really, "I'm your Huckleberry".....And the twirlin cup scene.......for example....

Where as Quaids Doc was far more "authentic".......an a superb performance.

Both were Excellent IMHO.........but for different reasons.

Of course, Kirk Douglas played Ol Doc pretty fuckin good as well.....

I wonder if Christian Bales new Western will be worth a fuck......
That genre, more than most, has suffered tremendously with the "snowflake" mentality that has been spoilin DipshitWood for decades.....

There's no fuckin way a movie like The Searchers get made today......he'll, I doubt Last of The Mohicans get made in remotely the same grandeur now a days......

Safe Space Revisionism in action.........

Anyways, how about those battery powered clothes.....Any thoughts from the Horde of Warmth?

Posted by: Hillbillyking at January 04, 2018 11:54 PM (JGzeX)

470 Jim: what happened to the ONT tank mechanic?

i haven't seen her in ages...

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 04, 2018 11:54 PM (JTKl5)

471 My kids grew up watching "Airplane!", and loved it. However, I had to explain to them that there was a book called "Airport", by a guy named Arthur Haley, which had sold by the millions; and later, a very popular movie based on it, which "Airplane!" is parodying (in part). They'd never heard of it. Sic transit gloria mundi ...

Posted by: Brown Line at January 04, 2018 11:54 PM (S6ArX)

472 take away the glamour and the perks, and we'd have fewer life-time seat holders.

I agree, make it suck as much as the founders envisioned: public service like jury duty. Low pay, no benefits, poor housing, minimal power. Serve out of duty, not greed.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:55 PM (39g3+)

473 462 Lefties loooove Franken because he basically read Talking Points Memo and sites like that -- the comments, not the articles -- and would spew that nonsense in hearings. He'd come off looking idiotic, but was too dim and shallow to know it.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:51 PM (39g3+)



Yeah well his stupidity got Sleepy Jeff to cede all authority on a huge scandal to someone that is connected to it.

Posted by: buzzion at January 04, 2018 11:55 PM (cAnNx)

474 Tuna, thanks for the heads-up on the latest Trumpentwitterung.


More solid entries. Love the "Sloppy Steve" thing - wonder if he used that prior to this time, in private? Wouldn't surprise me - Bannon has worked at his disheveled appearance for some time.


And while obvious, still excellent that he points out economic numbers like we have right now, under the previous prez, would be a gigantic story.

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 04, 2018 11:56 PM (QDnY+)

475 428 I don't understand why Bill Pullman didn't get more roles. He was great in Spaceballs and he was great in Independence Day (the first one, the good one). Is he a Republican?

His best recurring role was as Bill Paxton.

Posted by: wooga at January 04, 2018 11:56 PM (n5VsB)

476 Love this story that the Norks have been bombing themselves by accident.

Daily life there must be like living in a live-action Warner Bros cartoon sometimes, although with a lot more starving and less sanitation.

Posted by: qdpsteve at January 04, 2018 11:57 PM (eMKNe)

477 Yeah well his stupidity got Sleepy Jeff to cede all authority on a huge scandal to someone that is connected to it.

Al Franken did that huh? All by himself. Amazing.

Love this story that the Norks have been bombing themselves by accident.

Yeah my reaction to the North Koreans bombing themselves was "again?"

They did it a while back. A huge swath of the nation was suddenly on fire a while back under Clinton I think it was. Just... suddenly, for no apparent reason.

They're no threat to us, something the left does not seem to get.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:59 PM (39g3+)

478 oh great, Turkey is debating whether it's okay to marry nine year old girls. Legally it's not but Islamically they're saying it is.

Progress!

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 05, 2018 12:01 AM (/Ioag)

479 buzzion, good point. I enjoy but don't take too seriously all the Rip van Sessions jokes, but my real problem is with Rosenstein. His judgement, as reflected in his improper use of the DOJ regs on special counsel appointment, seems completely inadequate for his position.


McCarthy has a column up in which he labels Manafort's suit over the scope of Mueller's inquiry "frivolous" - haven't read it yet, but McCarthy himself has pointed out the problem with appointing a special counsel when no specific crime is known or suspected, so I'm wondering.


Also, the delays and stonewalling of the HPSCI - twice requiring the intervention of the Speaker to unravel, as far as we can tell - is absurd and inexcusable. Existence of ongoing investigation should not matter - and there is no conceivable excuse for not working things out or pleading "investigation" with Nunes *the day after the subpoena is issued* - yet we have a pattern of 11th hour semi-compliance. Ridiculous. Unless things are being misreported (and this stuff is only being covered by the few real journalists in the Beltway, so that seems less of a concern), or Nunes is a kook, Rosenstein, and possible Sessions and Wray, inspire Zero confidence or respect.


Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 12:02 AM (QDnY+)

480 I might look into a cheapo phone that you buy minutes for.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at January 04, 2018 11:32 PM (39g3+)


IF you have a fast and reliable internet connection, combine three things:
1. Any ordinary POTS phone where you plug RJ11 into a copper pair. Anything from an old AT&T slimline with a real bell and a pre-tangled cord to a new Panasonic cordless or a FAX or anything else. Just not a fancy office phone that needs a PBX.
2. An ObiTalk IP < -- > phone RJ11 device, ca. $50, available at Amazon, one-time purchase, no recurring charges, uses WIFI or CAT5.
3. A free google.com/voice account with a real live phone number, no charge for national calls. Associated phone number may be outside of your actual area code, like, say, if you live in 517 (mid-Michigan) you might get an 810 number (northern lower peninsula).

There you go - now your only monthly fee is the internet connection you already had, you have a real number you can dial in and out from, and whatever ordinary phone you want. The audio quality is even better for both parties if one has that setup, even if the other is on a cell phone.

Posted by: hogmartin at January 05, 2018 12:04 AM (y87Qq)

481 Trip insurance isn't "life insurance", like the old "flight insurance" they used to sell from the airport kiosks and vending machines.

If you're going to fly during the ice n' snow seasons, or make more complex plans such as a cruise, tour or "all inclusive" down to Cancun or such.

*Always* buy the Trip Insurance. It's cheap. And if you die in Cancun, it pays the tens of thousands of dollars to get your carcass home, too.

Don' know if it covers eating the spoiled fish on the Airplane, though.



Jim
Sunk New Dawn

Thanks for that explanation, Jim! I did not know it is now different from the old "crash, die and we pay" type of policy they used to sell airports.

Of course, all my travel has been either business or strict point A-to-point B personal, no cruises or other complicated stuff.

Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January 05, 2018 12:06 AM (QU+qf)

482 Did someone mention the Last of the Mohicans?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2eSL6Nv2ZdQ
[3 mins 18 secs]

Posted by: andycanuck at January 05, 2018 12:06 AM (QCX64)

483 Jim: what happened to the ONT tank mechanic?

i haven't seen her in ages...


Posted by: redc1c4 at January 04, 2018 11:54 PM (JTKl5)




Teachin' her grandbabies to turn wrenches, somewhere up in the Frozen Midwest, IIRC.

She does need to drop in to the ONT for some mandatory reorientation, time to time, I think.



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 12:11 AM (QzJWU)

484 417: Farmer, went to roku years ago. Never missed cable. Gave up on Fox News years ago. Helps my blood pressure. If Ace, J.J., or Vic don't cover it, I don't need it.
Posted by: chavez the hugo at January 04, 2018 11:37

Thanks chavez. we think the change will rock.

Posted by: Farmer at January 05, 2018 12:11 AM (yJ1e6)

485 OK, go see "Snowman". It's dreadful. Val Kilmer is in it...fucking shocking.

His health issues have done terrible things to the man.

I felt bad...that hardly happens.

Posted by: nip at January 05, 2018 12:12 AM (NUH4Q)

486 483 She bailed in solidarity with chi who bailed in solidarity with cooth more or less

Posted by: MAxIE at January 05, 2018 12:16 AM (9TR2V)

487 not to be disagreeable, but what you're talking about is called the "running gag" and it was actually a staple of the Marx Brothers' movies.

Posted by: SGTYork at January 04, 2018 11:29 PM (ITvKk)


========

Yes, I guess it falls under that category. Now I'm recalling that Monty Python also used a lot of similar gags. I never really liked Groucho so I've never seen a Marx bros movie. The ZAZ bring their own special panache to it though.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 05, 2018 12:17 AM (/qEW2)

488 It's wrong to gloat about others' misfortune after bragging about it.

I think Val Kilmer doesn't deserve what happened to him

Posted by: Kindltot at January 05, 2018 12:18 AM (2K6fY)

489 Interesting report from Herridge/Fox about Nunes-DOJ deal.


First of all, the concept and terminology of "deal" doesn't sit well, at all.


Unless there are standing statutory or other restrictions on what can be shared with oversight committees, it is not up to executive branch agencies to decide what they will share. Period. They are subordinate to the Congress in our system. Ex. office of the president, or matters dealing with direct communication with the president, fall under executive privilege, which is different, and inapplicable here.


And - again - WTF with 11th hour, grudging compliance, including running to mom (Ryan) to tell her that dad (Nunes) is being unfair?? If you get a f***king subpoena from House intel, and you don't plan to comply, you tell them the next day, and give your reasons - and suffer the consequences.


Report says docs will be unredacted - which will mark a change from things so far, I think.


Former DOJ official quoted by Herridge opined that the FBI is not accustomed to such scrutiny. Well la de da, f**k them and their ignorant, arrogant snowflake mindsets. Maybe - just some wild speculation here - the absence of outside scrutiny is one of the things that led to what appears the complete, constitution-destroying derailment of the FBI and DOJ.


They're public servants, subordinate to elected officials. Congress is such a pathetic, atrophied, irresponsible mess - permitted by a brain-dead electorate - that *this* is the level of arrogance and cluelessness we have in key institutions. We saw the cowardice and passivity of Congress under Obama - it's not changed. Except, perhaps, for a handful of members. Little has changed.


And I wish Leslie Nielsen were available to give press briefings. He and Sam Kinison.

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 12:19 AM (QDnY+)

490 487
I never really liked Groucho so I've never seen a Marx bros movie.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 05, 2018 12:17 AM (/qEW2)


I don't understand those words in that order.

Posted by: rickl at January 05, 2018 12:19 AM (sdi6R)

491 484 417: Farmer, went to roku years ago. Never missed cable. Gave up on Fox News years ago. Helps my blood pressure. If Ace, J.J., or Vic don't cover it, I don't need it.
Posted by: chavez the hugo at January 04, 2018 11:37

Thanks chavez. we think the change will rock.


Posted by: Farmer at January 05, 2018 12:11 AM (yJ1e6)



PlayStation Vue, which does have an app at least on Amazon Fire TVs is 39.99 a month and seems to have Fox News on the basic package.

Posted by: buzzion at January 05, 2018 12:21 AM (cAnNx)

492 Here's the PlayStation Vue packages options.

https://www.playstation.com/en-us/network/vue/channels/

Posted by: buzzion at January 05, 2018 12:22 AM (cAnNx)

493 483 She bailed in solidarity with chi who bailed in solidarity with cooth more or less

Posted by: MAxIE at January 05, 2018 12:16 AM (9TR2V)



I'm seldom aware of the behind-the-scenes politics, scheming, machinations and other forces which affect AoS and the ONT.

I *mostly* hate seeing long time Horde self-vacate the premises, regardless of the reasons.

That said, there's a distinction between "bailed", as described above, and "flounced", in the vein of the late-yet-not-lamented jeffchem.

Pity of it is though, sometimes, that difference becomes one without very much distinction.

We must all hang together, or we shall all surely hang separately.

Seem to recall reading of that, somewhere.

/franklin

More Morons iz whutz mo' bettah, I sez.





Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 12:22 AM (QzJWU)

494
They're public servants, subordinate to elected officials. Congress is such a pathetic, atrophied, irresponsible mess - permitted by a brain-dead electorate - that *this* is the level of arrogance and cluelessness we have in key institutions.

As long as they keep the spice flowing...
And as the country turns more blue...

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 05, 2018 12:24 AM (IqV8l)

495 thanks Jim and MAxIE... i can see her doing either or both.

i've got an e-mail addy here, someplace.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 12:25 AM (JTKl5)

496 Well, Jim we do know a few that were knocked out

Posted by: westminsterdogshow........GNAMM ette at January 05, 2018 12:26 AM (mMeIQ)

497 Well said, Jim. Though I must correct you - for a very long time, perhaps even up to the present time - a stunning (to me) number of morons have lamented the flouncination of the commenter you name. Whatever. It's a rich tapestry here, and I don't begrudge anyone acting as they please so long as the host is OK with it.

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 12:27 AM (QDnY+)

498 Well, Jim we do know a few that were knocked out

Posted by: westminsterdogshow........GNAMM ette at January 05, 2018 12:26 AM (mMeIQ)




Sadly, yes. We do.



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 12:27 AM (QzJWU)

499 Bertram, perhaps. After all, "representative" government is a multi-edged sword.

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 12:28 AM (QDnY+)

500 Contestant #3 had the best name.

Posted by: Headless Body of Agnew at January 05, 2018 12:29 AM (e1mEI)

501 I am thankful they let Miley back

Posted by: westminsterdogshow........GNAMM ette at January 05, 2018 12:29 AM (mMeIQ)

502 Heh Pakistan summoned our ambassador to find out why Trump suspended their security payments or whatever they're calling the bribes Georgie Porgie and Chocolate Jesus paid them.

You harbored Bin Laden for years.

*mic drop*

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at January 05, 2018 12:30 AM (4ErVI)

503 red, just for giggles and FYI, today I was in two fun stores, and I asked about private-party ammo sales. They laughed and said they can't do them at the moment - since they have no regs, procedures, forms, or information about what to do. Far as I can tell, people on CalGuns are going ahead with private sales, for now. Can't imagine there's any legal liability, as state DOJ is its usual incompetent mess, and law enforcement (maybe outside a few in SF or LA) has zero-point-zero interest in enforcing the law.

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 12:32 AM (QDnY+)

504 I don't understand those words in that order.

Posted by: rickl at January 05, 2018 12:19 AM (sdi6R)


========

Doesn't he strike you as kind of sneering and narcissistic? Even though the movies have a high reputation for their comedy, his persona just had nothing sympathetic about it and I've never been tempted to watch the films. I think he affects me in the same way that Donald Trump affects Ben Shapiro. Some of my favorite comics like Woody Allen are huge fans, I just can't.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 05, 2018 12:32 AM (/qEW2)

505 Richard Grenell has been appointed to be our new ambassador to Germany? Good for him!

I really grew to like him during his short stint on Mitch Romley's fake presidential campaign of 2012. I liked having a catty queen on our side for once. The dude was sort of a proto-Milo in that sense, and I thought it was dumb of Romley to fire him, but now I know Romley had zero intention of winning and Grenell was ultimately an obstacle in the way of losing graciously, so of course he had to go.

Posted by: Prothonotary Warbler at January 05, 2018 12:34 AM (wSC8T)

506 Dack, I've been asking around some of the old network but nobody has any insight into why "now" on the Pakistan $$ thing. Recall that we rent loyalty and cooperation all over the world, but esp. in the "arc of crisis" - SOP for them, usually the smart move for us. Our interest in Pakistan has always been our *own* interest, from the days of the Indian pro-Soviet tilt, to the need for logistics lines into A'stan during the Soviet war and esp. after 9/11.




Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 12:37 AM (QDnY+)

507 Oh. Grenell. That's okay then.

Posted by: Beowulf at January 05, 2018 12:37 AM (QCX64)

508
I know Romley had zero intention of winning


Dog in the manger has to dog in the manger ... by all means, Utahans, send this folded like a cheap suit has-been to the Senate!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at January 05, 2018 12:37 AM (pNxlR)

509 So... what do you fuckers want to talk about?

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:38 AM (Ckg4U)

510 Tank Girl was cool. Shame she isn't around anymore. That was one ballsy chick.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 12:38 AM (aMlLZ)

511 So... what do you fuckers want to talk about?


Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:38 AM (Ckg4U)


Boobs is a good default. lol

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 12:39 AM (aMlLZ)

512 YEA boobs!

Posted by: westminsterdogshow........GNAMM ette at January 05, 2018 12:40 AM (mMeIQ)

513 Dack@12:30: Worse than that... they actually arrested the guy who told us where Bin Laden was! He's still rotting in prison.

Posted by: Prothonotary Warbler at January 05, 2018 12:40 AM (wSC8T)

514 Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 12:32 AM (QDnY+)
---
we talked with an NRA lawyer over the hollerdays, and she told me that there is a *very* good chance the DOJ will be forced to announce, as they did with the latest "AW" nonsense, a delay in the start of the law, due to the fact they have not complied with the legal requirements for it to go into effect.

when i talked to CRPA this week they said their lawyers were looking at the issue, and that there should be a press release on the matter shortly

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 12:40 AM (lurxo)

515
464 Franken was already a celebrity so his taking the pension was just greed.
Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 04, 2018 11:52 PM (/Ioag)


Boy, oh boy, is comedy gonna SOAR now that he's back in the saddle!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at January 05, 2018 12:41 AM (pNxlR)

516 "Boobs is a good default. lol"
-Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 12:39 AM (aMlLZ)

I can dig it. Al Bundy used to read "Biggunz" regularly. Those are nice, but I'll take a well-proportioned handful and be thankful for it.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:41 AM (Ckg4U)

517 So... what do you fuckers want to talk about?
The thread being as flaccid now as a Clorox-ed dick?

Posted by: andycanuck at January 05, 2018 12:42 AM (QCX64)

518 So... what do you fuckers want to talk about?

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:38 AM (Ckg4U)

You missed the previous thread-consider yourself lucky.

A rare case when bleach made things icky.

Posted by: Miklos, a Molnar at January 05, 2018 12:42 AM (zCyNd)

519 So... what do you fuckers want to talk about?


Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:38 AM (Ckg4U)




If you suck in real life as thoroughly as the voice mail system on your phone's carrier service, you could be a zillionaire in Whorrywood.

OTHER. WISE.

How the hell is you, Brother Slap? *grin*



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 12:43 AM (QzJWU)

520 Actually, Milo as ambassador to Germany sounds even better (wait - is he an AmCit?).


He's actually exactly what the US should be saying/showing to Germany at this point. He's presumably got the Brit insight/disdain for the worst European ideas, but he'd be backed by Trumpian energy (the UK being, sadly, a sinking ship with many worthy people stuck aboard).


Imagine the comments on the insane German groveling to their Islamic lessers, at home and abroad. Almost as good as having Sam Kinison as WH press secretary.

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 12:43 AM (QDnY+)

521 'night, west-coasters. Late here now.

Posted by: andycanuck at January 05, 2018 12:43 AM (QCX64)

522 "You missed the previous thread-consider yourself lucky.
A rare case when bleach made things icky.
"
-Posted by: Miklos, a Molnar at January 05, 2018 12:42 AM (zCyNd)

I've been a part of too may threads like that. Thank goodness I didn't have to witness another.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:43 AM (Ckg4U)

523 Jim: have you had a chance to inspect the metal artw*rk or is it still soaking?

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 12:44 AM (lurxo)

524 Howdy, Brother Jim... lol.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:44 AM (Ckg4U)

525 I don't think Milo's actually a US citizen, AlteKocker. He's here on some sort of "extraordinary alien" visa. He would be awesome as an ambassador to Germany, but Grenell will be great for pretty much the same reasons.

Posted by: Prothonotary Warbler at January 05, 2018 12:46 AM (wSC8T)

526 i wonder how long before the fascists up in Sacto realize their zeks can make their own ammo with components ordered from out of state and ban that traffic too?

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 12:47 AM (lurxo)

527

On Thursday, French president Emmanuel Macron criticized the United States and Israel for encouraging anti-regime protests in Iran claiming, inter alia, that such talk would lead the world closer to war. "The official line pursued by the United States, Israel and Saudi Arabia, who are our allies in many ways, is almost one that would lead us to war," Macron told reporters.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 05, 2018 12:47 AM (IqV8l)

528 489
Congress is such a pathetic, atrophied, irresponsible mess - permitted by a brain-dead electorate - that *this* is the level of arrogance and cluelessness we have in key institutions.
Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 12:19 AM (QDnY+)


Great comment. And "atrophied" is a good word.

Congress has completely abdicated its constitutional authority. From "impeachment is off the table" to passing continuing resolutions instead of budgets, to "omnibus" spending bills so members don't have to record votes on specific items, Congress has become fundamentally unserious.

Congress created Federal agencies and gave them the power to write regulations with the force of law. Congress could exercise oversight over those agencies or abolish them entirely when they run amok, but they don't. Congress could impeach and remove Federal judges who overstep their authority, but they don't.

So now we have an Executive branch with dictatorial powers and a Judiciary with dictatorial powers. Congress, which is supposed to represent the People and the States, has voluntarily neutered itself. No 1933-style Enabling Act was necessary.

Congressmen and Senators enjoy the trappings of power and the juicy pensions, and of course getting rich from inside knowledge and being exempt from the laws they pass. Apart from that, Congress no longer seems to have an actual purpose today.

Posted by: rickl at January 05, 2018 12:47 AM (sdi6R)

529 Jim: have you had a chance to inspect the metal artw*rk or is it still soaking?


Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 12:44 AM (lurxo)



There is hope. I mixed 'em up FIFTEEN gallons of Ed's Red, and it's all in the soak.

Next step, into the Hot Wash for transmission parts, in the same (post filtration) solution.

If I can save it all without pitting, it'll be a miracle.



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 12:48 AM (QzJWU)

530 So did Obama warn a Muslim he was gonna get got sure cannot find the story now ultimate squirrel

Posted by: lousagirl at January 05, 2018 12:48 AM (PmCoA)

531 On Thursday, French president Emmanuel Macron criticized the United States and Israel for encouraging anti-regime protests in Iran claiming, inter alia, that such talk would lead the world closer to war. "The official line pursued by the United States, Israel and Saudi Arabia, who are our allies in many ways, is almost one that would lead us to war," Macron told reporters.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 05, 2018 12:47 AM (IqV8l)


French fucking faggot. They learned nothing.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 12:48 AM (aMlLZ)

532 The "refresh" is choppy tonight. I suppose that has to do with all the .gifs.

Well... That's WeirdDave's "signature". At least they are below the fold and not interfering with the main page.

They are all good by the way, WeirdDave.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:48 AM (Ckg4U)

533 So... what do you fuckers want to talk about?


Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:38 AM


Music?

Posted by: otho at January 05, 2018 12:49 AM (qGuLD)

534 "The official line pursued by the United States, Israel and Saudi Arabia, who are our allies in many ways, is almost one that would lead us to war," Macron told reporters.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at January 05, 2018 12:47 AM (IqV8l)

So surrender documents are being drawn up in three languages?

Posted by: Miklos de Trianon at January 05, 2018 12:49 AM (zCyNd)

535 "Obviously, you're not a golfer"........

"Walter,....what's the point?"........

Posted by: The Dude Abides at January 05, 2018 12:50 AM (JGzeX)

536 Kittehs indoors safe from the cold and watching Kiki's Delivery Service.

Nyah!

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at January 05, 2018 12:50 AM (yCOH/)

537 red, as good as that is to hear about CRPA etc., I am under-whelmed. Everyone's had nearly a year to prepare, the DOJ's stumble was expected. The good guys shoulda really been on a hair-trigger, ready to jump (in court).


If there is a near-revolution in the judiciary - esp. SCOTUS personnel changes - that returns it to something like a judicial system as opposed to a rogue unaccountable super-legislature for idiots, then maybe there's hope. But at the moment, for 2A matters, the authoritarians are in full control, and Heller has been effectively "over-ruled" by the "lower" courts.


Bet you a case of craft beer that CA outlaws all semi-auto rifles, or at least apes NY and MD, by the end of this year. Why not? The constitution doesn't apply here, the 9th is a Third World lawless farce, and SCOTUS cringes and snivels while its rulings are dismissed with contempt. Meanwhile, this ammo nonsense is going to be a body-blow, once the price effects are fully developed. Most damaging CA law yet.



Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 12:50 AM (QDnY+)

538 So did Obama warn a Muslim he was gonna get got sure cannot find the story now ultimate squirrel

Posted by: lousagirl at January 05, 2018 12:48 AM (PmCoA)


Remember that little traitorous bag of shit who showed the Persians the hidden path in the movie 300? Obama makes him look George Washington, or as my Italian granny would say. George a-wash.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 12:51 AM (aMlLZ)

539 ..."Congressmen and Senators enjoy the trappings of power and the juicy pensions, and of course getting rich from inside knowledge and being exempt from the laws they pass. Apart from that, Congress no longer seems to have an actual purpose today."
-Posted by: rickl at January 05, 2018 12:47 AM (sdi6R)

Mark Levin compares them to a potted plant and he is correct.

YOU HEARD ME!

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:51 AM (Ckg4U)

540 Howdy, Brother Jim... lol.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:44 AM (Ckg4U)



What, you want an ordinary greeting to the ONT?

Nahhhh, ain't gonna happen.

*rolls out red carpet stained with Ed's Red, Hoppe's No. 9 and Break Free, and Cheetos dust*



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 12:52 AM (QzJWU)

541 Thanks Berserker thought I was going crazy

Posted by: lousagirl at January 05, 2018 12:52 AM (PmCoA)

542 "Music?"
-Posted by: otho at January 05, 2018 12:49 AM (qGuLD)

This musical act hit #1 on the American Top 40 with "Come on Eileen".

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:52 AM (Ckg4U)

543 Former DOJ official quoted by Herridge opined that the FBI is not accustomed to such scrutiny. Well la de da, f**k them and their ignorant, arrogant snowflake mindsets. Maybe - just some wild speculation here - the absence of outside scrutiny is one of the things that led to what appears the complete, constitution-destroying derailment of the FBI and DOJ.

They're public servants, subordinate to elected officials. Congress is such a pathetic, atrophied, irresponsible mess - permitted by a brain-dead electorate - that *this* is the level of arrogance and cluelessness we have in key institutions. We saw the cowardice and passivity of Congress under Obama - it's not changed. Except, perhaps, for a handful of members. Little has changed. . .

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid


Preach it, brother.

Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January 05, 2018 12:52 AM (QU+qf)

544 This musical act hit #1 on the American Top 40 with "Come on Eileen".


Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:52 AM


Easy. Dexy's Midnight Runners.

Posted by: otho at January 05, 2018 12:53 AM (qGuLD)

545 493 I was just trying to be nice...I have my own strong feelings about that whole issue and the personalities involved but I just decided rather than start another poo-flinging evening I just say bailed voluntarily or no

Posted by: MAxIE at January 05, 2018 12:54 AM (9TR2V)

546 Because if there's one thing Americans like better than a lecture from the British, it's a lecture from the fucking Frogs.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at January 05, 2018 12:54 AM (/Ioag)

547 "Music?"
-Posted by: otho at January 05, 2018 12:49 AM (qGuLD)

This musical act hit #1 on the American Top 40 with "Come on Eileen".

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:52 AM (Ckg4U)


Ok lets not get silly.lol

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 12:55 AM (aMlLZ)

548 W'hell, Jim. I hadn't expected any sort of Royal Treatment. I don't even believe that Kim du Toit gets such a treatment from his Royal Pals.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:56 AM (Ckg4U)

549 537 No need to ban elephants if you can ban elephant food...
anyone in CA. who doesn't already have at least 3K rounds for every common caliber they use deserves what they're getting imho

Posted by: MAxIE at January 05, 2018 12:56 AM (9TR2V)

550 Macron, just as he appears, is an idiot and a lightweight. And of course Iran has been at war with the US, Israel, and western civilization for 40 years already.


In any case, we're not talking about Cameroun or Chad, so France has no say and no importance. They are tough and effective in Africa, useless everywhere else, and esp. in the Mid-East.


Tell me again, boy - and please have your mom leave the room .... oh, that's your wife, sorry! - what % of your laughable military forces are currently assigned to protecting Jewish targets in France from your newest citizens and their offspring? Last time I checked it was around 40%.

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 12:56 AM (QDnY+)

551 Walter......"That rug REALLY tied the room together...."

Me......."Fuckin A".....

Hmmmm, PUFF, PUFF.....arhemmm..........

Whooooaaaaaa......Man.........Far Out........

Thai Stick in the past.....when contemplating the perception of the existential congruence of rug nucturation with......Fuckin Brevity an what not.......WHOA......

RUGS FOR EVERYONE!

Posted by: The Dude Abides at January 05, 2018 12:56 AM (JGzeX)

552 beyond pissed off when paul Ryan and McConnell are so fucking happy and kissing trumps ass the shark has been jumped

Posted by: lousagirl at January 05, 2018 12:57 AM (PmCoA)

553 "Ok lets not get silly.lol"
-Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 12:55 AM (aMlLZ)

All I have is "silly", amigo. "Angry, Bitter and Furious" are the other options.

Have some operatic ManOWar:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4sj1vSGW-F4

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:58 AM (Ckg4U)

554 In the times of sorrows 22LR will be the universal currency

Posted by: MAxIE at January 05, 2018 12:58 AM (9TR2V)

555 I better go to bed night all God Bless

Posted by: lousagirl at January 05, 2018 12:59 AM (PmCoA)

556 I still can't believe what a pile of shit the movie Dunkirk was.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 12:59 AM (aMlLZ)

557 G'Night, lousagirl.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:00 AM (Ckg4U)

558 I still can't believe what a pile of shit the movie Dunkirk was.


Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 12:59 AM


Thoughts?

Posted by: otho at January 05, 2018 01:00 AM (qGuLD)

559 Rhomboid an Eleanor-

Take cheer, It's all coming together.


The FBI cabal is breaking-Comey is gone, McCabe is on his way out, Strzok has been demoted and its still in the target sights, Priestap is probably the last of the main poisonous actors there, and will be grilled next week.

OIG report coming in about 2 months.

At DOJ, Sally Yates is gone, and Ohr (and his missus) is under the gun. Lisa Page is exposed.

They had years to dig in, and will take flamethrowers to clear the bunkers.

Posted by: Miklos de Molnar at January 05, 2018 01:00 AM (zCyNd)

560 All I have is "silly", amigo. "Angry, Bitter and Furious" are the other options.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:58 AM (Ckg4U)


Is that anything like my Revenge Mode 1, Revenge Mode 2, and Genocide?

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 01:01 AM (aMlLZ)

561 Congress has completely abdicated its constitutional authority. From "impeachment is off the table" to passing continuing resolutions instead of budgets, to "omnibus" spending bills so members don't have to record votes on specific items, Congress has become fundamentally unserious.

Congress created Federal agencies and gave them the power to write regulations with the force of law. Congress could exercise oversight over those agencies or abolish them entirely when they run amok, but they don't. Congress could impeach and remove Federal judges who overstep their authority, but they don't.

So now we have an Executive branch with dictatorial powers and a Judiciary with dictatorial powers. Congress, which is supposed to represent the People and the States, has voluntarily neutered itself. No 1933-style Enabling Act was necessary.

Congressmen and Senators enjoy the trappings of power and the juicy pensions, and of course getting rich from inside knowledge and being exempt from the laws they pass. Apart from that, Congress no longer seems to have an actual purpose today.
Posted by: rickl

You preach it, too, brother Rick!!


Heh, I love the thought of Milo as ambassador to Germany -- altrhough I'm mighty fond of Richard Grenell too. I'm happy for him.

Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January 05, 2018 01:01 AM (QU+qf)

562 "Is that anything like my Revenge Mode 1, Revenge Mode 2, and Genocide?"
-Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 01:01 AM (aMlLZ)

Close. Although I don't have the facilities to perform the third operation.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:02 AM (Ckg4U)

563 "YOU THINK I'M FUCKIN AROUND HERE?!?!!? MARK IT FUCKIN ZERO!!!!!!"

"......You mean other than Pacifism..."

Posted by: Walter Kochek at January 05, 2018 01:02 AM (JGzeX)

564 Beserker, agreed (Dunkirk). Look I'm a WWII addict, so I enjoy the gear and the cinematography and the action, etc. But it was a film school project, not a commercial release.


My favorite (as in "you have to be f***ing kidding me!") part? The dedication at the end. "To all those affected by the battle" (think I have this right)


WTFF? Is there any better, more stunning example of the mind-rot of Europe and most of the UK?

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 01:02 AM (QDnY+)

565 depending on the piece, pitting may not be an issue, especially if it's light.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 01:03 AM (lurxo)

566 Kentucky Fried Movie: One of the best one-liner openings, ever. "Film at 11", indeed.

Posted by: Shopgirl: #KStateWonTheirs at January 05, 2018 01:04 AM (Ch2LU)

567 493 I was just trying to be nice...I have my own strong feelings about that whole issue and the personalities involved but I just decided rather than start another poo-flinging evening I just say bailed voluntarily or no

Posted by: MAxIE at January 05, 2018 12:54 AM (9TR2V)



That's OK, MAxIE.

I just prefer more present, than absent.

Not everyone here will be my friend, nor I, theirs.

But, a Brother sharpens a Brother, like Iron upon Iron.

Bet that Slap can crank out the scriptural reference for that one?

Weft Cut Loop used to VEX me with endless deprecations as to my nic, signature and such.

And though I flamethowered in response, I did not hate, nor pout, nor flounce or whine to the COBs.

In time, Weft came to ignore the "unique" nature of my sig, and I thus no longer had to "react" to the deprecations thereof. In other words, we were just another two of the Horde, from then on.

I can and do ignore, a great deal of what might otherwise "offend" me, here. BFD.

Bet 'ch'all do, too.

Cause we don't suck pacifiers anymore, etc.

The Moronosphere is a HOT kitchen. Best be prepared to deal with the heat, iffn' ya wanna hang 'round these parts, capeche?



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 01:05 AM (QzJWU)

568 Doesn't he strike you as kind of sneering and narcissistic? Even though the movies have a high reputation for their comedy, his persona just had nothing sympathetic about it and I've never been tempted to watch the films. I think he affects me in the same way that Donald Trump affects Ben Shapiro. Some of my favorite comics like Woody Allen are huge fans, I just can't.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at January 05, 2018 12:32 AM (/qEW2)

++++

He was hilarious in films like Duck Soup or A Night at the Opera, but I liked him best on his game show, You Bet Your Life. His true self came through when he was interviewing the guests and he seemed pretty well adjusted to me. He would crack wise, but he always showed kindness to his guests.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at January 05, 2018 01:05 AM (pvjTE)

569
WTFF? Is there any better, more stunning example of the mind-rot of Europe and most of the UK?

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 01:02 AM (QDnY+)

The post-Dunkirk speech was this one, although the Brits have apparently forgotten:

"We shall defend our island whatever the cost may be. We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills. We shall never surrender."

Posted by: Miklos quotes Churchill's dedication at January 05, 2018 01:07 AM (zCyNd)

570 I still can't believe what a pile of shit the movie Dunkirk was.
Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison
------------

Glad that I only paid for pay per view. Entertaining enough, but 1 to 10, only a 6.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 05, 2018 01:07 AM (cp1if)

571 Thoughts?

Posted by: otho at January 05, 2018 01:00 AM (qGuLD)


Well it was such a huge event, with shitloads of boats and ships. If you didn't know the story you wouldn't have got it from the movie. All I got from it was a couple dudes had back luck with boarding ships, a local yacht club scrounged up a few boats, and 2 dudes in planes were working overtime. It was very strange.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 01:10 AM (aMlLZ)

572 Romans 12:10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:10 AM (Ckg4U)

573 The post-Dunkirk speech was this one, although the Brits have apparently forgotten:

"We shall defend our island whatever the cost may be. We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills. We shall never surrender."
Posted by: Miklos quotes Churchill's dedication

Sigh. You know, seeing/hearing that again, and knowing what's going on in old Blighty now, just makes me sad.

Real sad.

Posted by: Eleanor, What the Cat Dragged In at January 05, 2018 01:11 AM (QU+qf)

574 532 The "refresh" is choppy tonight. I suppose that has to do with all the .gifs.

Well... That's WeirdDave's "signature". At least they are below the fold and not interfering with the main page.

They are all good by the way, WeirdDave.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 12:48 AM (Ckg4U)

++++

Block images from IMGUR.com. I keep them blocked here by default. I will allow them for my first viewing of a WD ONT, but then block them again after that. No problems with refreshes that way.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at January 05, 2018 01:12 AM (pvjTE)

575 red, as good as that is to hear about CRPA etc., I am under-whelmed.
Everyone's had nearly a year to prepare, the DOJ's stumble was expected.
The good guys shoulda really been on a hair-trigger, ready to jump (in
court).
---
oh, they WERE ready to go to court. in fact what she said was that because of the failure of DOJ to get it's shit together, and the subsequent inevitable delay on actual enforcement, they (the lawyers at all levels) felt they should use the time to vet more potential plaintiffs, etc.

she also said they expect to "lose all the way to the Supreme Court", because 9th Circus.


Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 01:12 AM (lurxo)

576 Miley sent me an entire set of Joyce Meyer CDs.

I'm working through them as I fight against my inner-nature to explode.

I'm not twenty anymore.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:12 AM (Ckg4U)

577 Wow, excellent rant by rickl. He had it all in there. Hadn't seen it, naturally repeated some of his points in my mini-rant just above.


One simple, odd-seeming, but potentially powerful thing Trump can do - unilaterally - to start the return of politics to politics (displacing ruinous incumbent inertia) is to refuse to sign any continuing resolutions of more than a week's duration, and *any* omnibus ones. State it loud, proud, and repeatedly, and warn the leadership of both parties. He should have done it last January.


Then we'd have the Senate in the crosshairs. Make the Senate Dems (and their equivalents in the R camp) sweat, and answer for their obstruction. Not a chance Trump loses *that* political battle - best time for it in a long time. The electorate is not obsessed with "govt. shut-downs", doesn't notice them for the most part, and deserves to know exactly why things are stuck, and exactly who is making it that way.


Politics. Differentiation. Choices. Hot seats. Big votes. The basic currency of congressional politics, almost completely removed since 2009. Broken china and drama are unavoidable, Trump is exactly the right guy to start and oversee them.

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 01:12 AM (QDnY+)

578 Though Dunkirk was a lousy lesson as a historical film, it was still an absolutely beautiful rendition of individual scenes on the IMAX screen.

IF one were historically well read, well, one naturally filled in the copious blank spaces, already knowing the story, of course.

And then, it was a wonderful tribute.

Destroyed only at the end, by that horrid "tribute". Sucked the wind right out of it's sails, and then some.

But, if I were to have taken an historically illiterate sort to view the film? I'd have to spend the next six hours at the cigar lounge, explaining the history over bourbon and cigars.

The cigars would be mandatory.

Because, Churchill. Of course.



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 01:13 AM (QzJWU)

579 "Block images from IMGUR.com. I keep them blocked here by default. I will allow them for my first viewing of a WD ONT, but then block them again after that. No problems with refreshes that way."
-Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at January 05, 2018 01:12 AM (pvjTE)

Roger that. Thank you.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:13 AM (Ckg4U)

580 Beserker, agreed (Dunkirk). Look I'm a WWII addict, so I enjoy the gear and the cinematography and the action, etc. But it was a film school project, not a commercial release.


My favorite (as in "you have to be f***ing kidding me!") part? The dedication at the end. "To all those affected by the battle" (think I have this right)


WTFF? Is there any better, more stunning example of the mind-rot of Europe and most of the UK?


Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 01:02 AM (QDnY+)


Exactly, to all those affected by the battle...as if they were some small group that got their social security checks late or some shit.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 01:14 AM (aMlLZ)

581 23 The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.

3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

King James Version (KJV)

Posted by: lousagirl at January 05, 2018 01:14 AM (PmCoA)

582 Europe in general should be fucking ashamed of themselves. They learned nothing. Their last great appeasement cost the world 60-70 million dead.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 01:17 AM (aMlLZ)

583 @564....

Per WWII movies.....

Favorite of y'alls.......

One of mine is The Battle of Britain.....

If for no other reason, than a Member of the Guinea Pig Club made an appearance.

The Guinea Pigs.......Exceptional Humans. Their story is thread worthy......

Posted by: Hillbillyking at January 05, 2018 01:17 AM (JGzeX)

584 Romans 12:10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:10 AM (Ckg4U)



Brother Slap.

Try Proverbs 27:17 KJV

"Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend."


I'm a big fan of the KJV, for reasons too involved to discuss, here.



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 01:18 AM (QzJWU)

585 I though you were going to bed, lousagirl... lol.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:18 AM (Ckg4U)

586 weft, there's a name I haven't seen in ages.


Oh, and I have a real-life Big Lebowski ashes-spreading anecdote. Someone I know with a boat took people out off the coast of Orange County to spread the ashes of two departed friends, one a neighbor.


Sailboat, but motoring slowly, the people dumped the ashes, slowly, kind of sifting them out of two little pots - the air vortex/circulation behind the boat pushed some of the ashes up onto the back of the hull, some into the cockpit (friend described washing it down later).


Not exactly as hilarious as the thing with Donnie's ashes blowing into The Dude's beard on the bluffs at Zuma or wherever ("Walter!??), but close enough.



Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 01:19 AM (QDnY+)

587 I though you were going to bed, lousagirl... lol.



Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:18 AM (Ckg4U)


Girls just wanna have fun.

So they tell me anyway.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 01:20 AM (aMlLZ)

588 585 SlapweAsel, I am haha
Love you guys

Posted by: lousagirl at January 05, 2018 01:20 AM (PmCoA)

589 Sorry Slapweasel, on my iPad and it sucks and incorrectly does names and such night

Posted by: lousagirl at January 05, 2018 01:22 AM (PmCoA)

590 Great Proverb, Jim.

For it is true that one shall hone one's wit and strength against honorable individuals.

Might we all dare to allow ourselves the right to be wrong and find it sharpened amongst the greater and lesser individuals.

May your sword be always at the ready, Good Sir.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:23 AM (Ckg4U)

591 Jim:

I've been trying to quit smoking cigarettes and have been using the e-cig lately. That works fine when I'm out and about during the day, but I still want to actually smoke on evenings and weekends.

I'm sorely tempted to buy a new bag of tobacco for making cigarettes on the way home from work Friday. But what about cigars? It sounds like they might be an alternative worth looking into.

Posted by: rickl at January 05, 2018 01:24 AM (sdi6R)

592 it's going to be amusing when DOJ reports to the Legislature the results of the mandatory AW registration, since they know how many AR's, etc, have been sold here in the last few years.

i can't see why *anyone* would not render their rifle featureless, rather than sign up for a category that is bound to be banned in the future.

it's like when the City of Lost Angels banned mags over 10 rounds, even grandfathered ones... exactly ZERO were turned in, even after the police chief begged people to comply, after the date, promising them no prosecution.

i also know there are a shitload of guns on the original AW list that never got registered then either.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 01:24 AM (lurxo)

593 That's okay, lousagirl... lol.

I still love you.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:24 AM (Ckg4U)

594 Check out the link in the tag y'all.....

Fascinating story about the Indomitable Nature of the Human Spirit.

The Guinea Pig Club........

There has to be a Modern equivalent......Given the number of WOT burn survivors that have thrived......is there a definitive history, society, etc....documenting those Heroes?

Ol America needs a Singular Honor to bestow upon those that TRIUMPH in the Face of Horrendous Adversity......

The MOH represents COURAGE in battle.......I dare say there are Those WORTHY after the fact that DESERVE an Equivalent......

Posted by: Hillbillyking at January 05, 2018 01:25 AM (JGzeX)

595 Posted by: rickl at January 05, 2018 01:24 AM (sdi6R)

Have you tried a pipe?

Posted by: hogmartin at January 05, 2018 01:26 AM (y87Qq)

596 "Girls just wanna have fun.
...So they tell me anyway.
"
-Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 01:20 AM (aMlLZ)

They do. Let's give it to 'em.

...you're married?

Then give it to HER, Brother!

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:27 AM (Ckg4U)

597 Well it was such a huge event, with shitloads of boats and ships. If you didn't know the story you wouldn't have got it from the movie. All I got from it was a couple dudes had back luck with boarding ships, a local yacht club scrounged up a few boats, and 2 dudes in planes were working overtime. It was very strange.


Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Divison at January 05, 2018 01:10 AM


Ah, well... I see. Yes. That's Nolan for you. Admirably, he wanted to do it entirely on real film, with zero CGI, on the actual location. Fantastic. However, Nolan is big on the ideas but weak when it comes to storytelling. Some of those things that bugged you can probably be put down to make a story fit the grand film making concepts. Honestly, it was the most coherent story he's done for a loooong time, simply because he is normally guilty of "telling not showing". At least in this one, we weren't being subjected to literally hours of gab, gab, gab... telling us what we already knew and saw, or worse telling us stuff because whatever it is makes no fucking sense.

But, he still had to Nolanise it with all that multiple timeline bullshit, cz... Nolan. What bugged me the most is that he cast the characters so I couldn't tell them apart. They looked that similar. I'm fine with characters in a story like that being taken "as is"... who they are at this moment in time (don't need a back story). But... you've got to able to identify with them and I didn't know who was who. One guy had a life vest at one stage. That's about it.


Yeah, the scale of the movie left a lot to be desired. If you need a WW2 fleet and 1000's of troops on screen.... DON'T decide "no cgi", unless you got the toys and extras to do it. If you can't mess up the beach to make it look real.... DON'T decide to film it at Dunkirk, coz you're not allowed to mess it up. Find a stand in location and fuck that beach up. Nolan... good director, but is a frustrating story teller.

Posted by: otho at January 05, 2018 01:29 AM (qGuLD)

598 Gotta be Airplane! Followed insecond place by Top Secret!

This is the strangest AoS movie thread: 1- I've seen all the movies being discussed. 2- I really enjoyed all the movies being discussed.

First time for everything, I guess.

Posted by: JTB at January 05, 2018 01:29 AM (V+03K)

599 red, I haven't followed it closely, but haven't CT and NY had similar experiences - some kind of registration or surrender was required, and compliance is estimated at about .00001% of the known firearms in question?


Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 01:30 AM (QDnY+)

600 My Favorite ManOWar Song...

"Kingdom Come"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEGWbO91Lls

I have seventeen "favorites".

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:30 AM (Ckg4U)

601 I've been trying to quit smoking cigarettes and have been using the e-cig lately. That works fine when I'm out and about during the day, but I still want to actually smoke on evenings and weekends.

I'm sorely tempted to buy a new bag of tobacco for making cigarettes on the way home from work Friday. But what about cigars? It sounds like they might be an alternative worth looking into.

Posted by: rickl at January 05, 2018 01:24 AM (sdi6R)




In that one does not inhale the smoke from a premium cigar, they are wonderful "quit cigarette" crutches.

That said, fair warning. They can give you one hell of a nicotine blast via the salivary route.

And also, they are far more satisfying in the tactile sense, both to the feel of the natural leaf which is the wrapper, to the creamy smoothness of a rich blend's smoke. And not to mention the complex, subtle and DELICOUS flavors present in the smoke from an expertly blended cigar.

No mere cigarette can compete. Not even the most expensive Dunhill. Period.

Consider this, too. A fine cigar is the commitment of an hour, or more. You HAVE to sit back, relax and ENJOY. Very, very good for the state of mind.

Vs. the hurried "puffs" of a furtive cigarette smoker, hurrying a few minutes puffs before having to dash back to the cubicle, etc.

My email is in my nic. Write to me, and I'll send you one of the very finest cigars on the market, bar none.



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 01:32 AM (QzJWU)

602 Carry On.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SFE4GnUirOY

This is also my favorite song. One of seventeen.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:35 AM (Ckg4U)

603 otho, with all due respect, this Nolan guy (and lots of other directors, based on what I see) really should be no more than a director of cinematography or whatever it's called. Making the visuals nice. Other than that, clearly not up to the job, or the subject. As I said, film school project (with a bigger budget), not commercial release.


As for the absurd and historically idiotic dedication at the end, I can only assume this reflects his and his retinue's level of historical literacy and moral clarity.

Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 01:36 AM (QDnY+)

604 @586....

Far,
How many uncomfortably hilarious "ashes" stories are out there?

The nature of living means People do fucked up (unintentional) People things.......

I've heard a few in my time.......And say what you will.....I've laughed at the absurd morbid nature of them.

That's what makes "The Coffee Can" part of Lebowski so resonant....
A 1000 dollar urn, etc.......

Posted by: Hillbillyking at January 05, 2018 01:37 AM (JGzeX)

605 Not urn, "receptacle".


$1,000 receptacle.


"Say what you want about the tenets of National Socialism, Donnie, at least it was an ethos".


Pretty much nonsense, but in context, hilarious.


Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 01:41 AM (QDnY+)

606 The only one who comes to mind for consistent over the top humor, starting with Blazing Saddles, but Mel Brooks doesn't use the straight face approach, so not quite the same.

The only movie I think provides about as many quotable lines is Josey Wa!es.

Posted by: JTB at January 05, 2018 01:42 AM (V+03K)

607 I talked to 'chavez' this morning for the fifteenth time and that fucker is eminently entertaining.

He was just 'checking-in' on me and I am eternally grateful for that.

I love that dude.

Thank you all for your Prayer Requests because they keep me sane and in-line. The last thing I need is to feel sorry for myself.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:43 AM (Ckg4U)

608 "You want a toe? Because I can get you a toe"

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:44 AM (Ckg4U)

609 @ Hillbillyking.


I was 1st mate on several large charter motor yachts out on Galveston Bay.

More than a few "scattered at sea" evolutions, of course.

We had 'em remove all footwear and hosiery, and stand out on the swim platform, and put the lip of the container no more than six inches above the water.

Yeah, even then, most of 'em brought home a "souvinier", one might say.

Hunter Thompson did it right, with the Ashes Cannon.

The ONLY time Depp didn't screw the pooch?



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX


P.S. you really missed November's Lone Star Rally here on the island. Most perfectest weather, ever!

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 01:44 AM (QzJWU)

610 Receptacle Indeed.....H/ T.....

White Russians on me.....

AutoBahn Forever!

Posted by: Hillbillyking at January 05, 2018 01:45 AM (JGzeX)

611 @609.....

The Gospel of My Brother........

High Test on Me!!!

If only managin the Kingdom this past year didn't require ALL MY FUCKIN time I would've been down......

But we're young Brother.....there's this year for quality single malts...

The Horde is Strong down G-ton way.......Winning never gets old J!

Posted by: Hillbillyking at January 05, 2018 01:50 AM (JGzeX)

612 Thanks, Jim! E-mail sent.

Posted by: rickl at January 05, 2018 01:51 AM (sdi6R)

613 I just re-found the wonders of Yahoo's Instant Messenger tonight.

I haven't used that in years.

I was a mid-twenties dude in a "chat-room".

a/s/l?

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 01:52 AM (Ckg4U)

614 otho, with all due respect, this Nolan guy (and lots of other directors, based on what I see) really should be no more than a director of cinematography or whatever it's called. Making the visuals nice. Other than that, clearly not up to the job, or the subject. As I said, film school project (with a bigger budget), not commercial release.



Posted by: Farshimmelt AlteKocker, AKA rhomboid at January 05, 2018 01:36 AM


There's some truth in that. Delusions of being an "auteur"- writing and directing. Nolan reminds me a bit of Shyamalan. It's possible that Nolan, like Shyamalan before him aren't even that good as a director and is made to look good by his DP's. Shyamalan looked like a great director (but terrible writer)... when he lost the great Tak Fujimoto as DP, the cracks began to really show. Who knows, a number of high profile directors may be carried by their DP's.

*dammit posted this in the bleaching thread below by accident*

Posted by: otho at January 05, 2018 01:54 AM (qGuLD)

615 Well.....

THERE'S A RED FUCKIN CORVETTE!

See, what happens Larry..........

Posted by: Walter Kochek at January 05, 2018 01:54 AM (JGzeX)

616 Waco and Ruby Ridge were some of the most
outrageously evil things I've ever seen the US Government do and that
includes the Indian wars and testing diseases on black populations.
Inconceivable that they did it and basically got away with it all, with
the press desperately covering for them.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor
***********

They wanted to do that with the Bundy's but whoops, there was armed resistance.

Posted by: Stubby Karl at January 05, 2018 01:55 AM (LWdJM)

617 @ Slap.

Instant Messenger should've never faded as it did.

Trends killed it, not functionality.

It still offers the best, non-vocal, direct communications medium of all online options.

As for "chat rooms?" Yeah, I'm a veteran of those wars. Still have the scars to prove it, too.

But still have some actual friends from those days, so go figure?



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 01:56 AM (QzJWU)

618 -Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 01:56 AM (QzJWU)

If you have an email from me, then you still have a link to I.M. through Yahoo.

If I don't respond to your I.M., that doesn't mean that I don't like you. It simply means that I don't want to talk to you.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 02:00 AM (Ckg4U)

619 not sure about chat rooms, but i spent a lot of time on Usenet, and still have RL friends from there...

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:04 AM (lurxo)

620 assuming there are no hurricanes this summer to get in the way of things, is there a chance we can get another Postal Match into the record books?

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:08 AM (lurxo)

621 Yeah, time for me to pull that yellow n' black Loud Handle.

Hasta la nite nite, Horde!

*ejects*




Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at January 05, 2018 02:09 AM (QzJWU)

622 616....

Randy was destroyed because of a sawed off shotgun.......Gerry Spence was his Jesus, (no offense)......didn't help his boy....but at least he didn't get the needle.

Any objective analysis of G overreach concludes that OUR institutions run amok from time to time.....the flavors change, but the FIST stays the same......

An folks wonder why some of US value the 2nd so fervently........

Posted by: Hillbillyking at January 05, 2018 02:10 AM (JGzeX)

623 They wanted to do that with the Bundy's but whoops, there was armed resistance.

Posted by: Stubby Karl at January 05, 2018 01:55 AM (LWdJM)
---
and don't forget social media, so the MFM couldn't spin the story, spewing only FBI approved bullshit to the masses.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:10 AM (lurxo)

624 G'Night, Jim.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 02:11 AM (Ckg4U)

625 There's that new TV show the Post. Who lied more the Military or the News? Walter "Tet offensive" Cronkite. The famous reporter that said he would't tell our troops about an upcoming ambush. I know there are tons more examples hell the press didn't ruin Jane Fonda for flirting with the AA Gun guys. Still pissed our politicians gave the win our solders won back to the Commies.

Posted by: X-ray at January 05, 2018 02:13 AM (QQ4UP)

626 funny that: i ask Jim about the Postal Match and he disappears...

i wonder if that's a "tell"?


Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:14 AM (lurxo)

627 I get so many emails from all y'all that I'm just going to have to ask you to leave your nic/sock at the end.

This shit gets confusing.

Eleven "Mikes" is too many.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 02:15 AM (Ckg4U)

628 true story related to the first picture upstairs: i had a neighbor for awhile who was the guy who invented Panavision...

kewl old guy, lots of great stories, when he could have visitors. his POS family couldn't wait for him to die and wouldn't let his caretaker take him out anywhere beside the doctor's and his church, because expensive.

then they fought over everything in the house, dollar by dollar. lovely people, really. he should have cut them off with a quarter each and left it to a rescue shelter or something.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:18 AM (lurxo)

629 Eleven "Mikes" is too many.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 02:15 AM (Ckg4U)
---

yeah, but there is only one ME!

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:19 AM (lurxo)

630 Goodnight, ONT Horde.

Rest well, and dream of large women.

Posted by: Otto Pilot at January 05, 2018 02:20 AM (kUotE)

631 Oops, sock.

Night.

Posted by: Johnny at January 05, 2018 02:21 AM (kUotE)

632 "From Moses to Sandy Koufax".....

Spinals........I'll put em back in their chair.

Posted by: Walter Kochek at January 05, 2018 02:21 AM (JGzeX)

633 "yeah, but there is only one ME!"
-Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:19 AM (lurxo)

Thanks, Mike.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 02:23 AM (Ckg4U)

634 What's this day of rest shit? What's this bullshit?......

Posted by: Jesus Quintana at January 05, 2018 02:24 AM (JGzeX)

635 ...or should I call you "heartless"?

Miley has told me about that, but I don't get it.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 02:27 AM (Ckg4U)

636 "Something else we could put em in......."

"Bowling and Surfing......"

"Donny LOVED Bowling..."

Fuckin Far........Receptacle Expert.

Posted by: The Dude Abides at January 05, 2018 02:29 AM (JGzeX)

637 things you didn't know existed, and would have been happy to remain ignorant of:

Urethral Toys

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:30 AM (lurxo)

638 Miley has told me about that, but I don't get it.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 02:27 AM (Ckg4U)
---
i was pretty drunk that ONT, but i believe i told her the story about repoing the ladies car whilst she was standing at the altar getting married.


Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:32 AM (lurxo)

639 Last Jedi spoiler: If you haven't seen it, don't

This movie keeps getting worse the more people think about it. I'm having difficulty watching the fan plot patch videos which are increasingly pathetic given that we know no one's doing any planning or continuity checks in these movies. Which is why I'm not linking the video trying to explain why Luke's mechanical hand wasn't lying on the ground at the end of his last shot, which makes no sense given all that has gone before about the separation of mechanical things and at least the light side of the force.

No, this is a video which based on descriptions in what is effectively a companion guide for TLJ, so Disney 'canon,' which makes a strong case that when Rey found Luke at the beginning of the movie he was preparing to commit suicide. And given the event of his last shot (which I'm not being vague about to avoid the spoiler but because there's quite a bit of argument over what happened and why, with Hamill giving the most optimistic and least likely explanation of 'he was teleported away' [like in star trek] ), makes the character assassination complete.

https://preview.tinyurl.com/y7quj8cy

Posted by: Methos and 81,439 other people want Last Jedi erased from canon at January 05, 2018 02:32 AM (XQvuQ)

640 "Sometimes you eat the bar.....And sometimes...well, you know......
The Dude Abides......"

Take Comfort in that......

Takin It EASY for.all Us Sinners.......

Posted by: The Dude Abides at January 05, 2018 02:33 AM (JGzeX)

641 "then they fought over everything in the house, dollar by dollar."

Every time the BIL is in town there is always a conversation that foreshadows this outcome when my dad dies. Most stuff OK but the cabin I worked on roofing, putting new floors in putting up the pole barn with my Dad over 20 years. "Sister was older hated the cabin so rarely even went to sleep there"What right do you have an equal share in that?

Posted by: X-ray at January 05, 2018 02:33 AM (QQ4UP)

642 "Obviously, you're not a golfer."

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 02:34 AM (Ckg4U)

643 "I was pretty drunk that ONT, but I believe I told her the story about repoing the ladies car whilst she was standing at the altar getting married."
-Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:32 AM (lurxo)

That sounds like quite the story. Miley doesn't just "make shit up", so it has to be some sort of tale.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 02:38 AM (Ckg4U)

644 @)639.....

Tryin to be vague too......

But, isn't it awesome to SEE that much firepower, (theoretically) employed and still not make a dent?

I, enjoyed the Hell outta that!!!

Granted......I understood once Georgie L sold out to Disney shit was gonna be fucked......

So, I resigned myself to simply being entertained.

An, I was. As long as I didn't think it through.

But tell Me,...the biggest let down is the 20th Century Fox theme intro not being there......Especially for those of US that saw any of the Real Trilogy in the theaters......

It was the the "foreplay" so to speak......

Posted by: Hillbillyking at January 05, 2018 02:45 AM (JGzeX)

645 I believe I told her the story about repoing the ladies car whilst she was standing at the altar getting married."

-Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:32 AM (lurxo)

So a kind of jus primae noctis?

Posted by: X-ray at January 05, 2018 02:47 AM (QQ4UP)

646 Okay... ten minutes between comments and three posts in-a-row means that it is time for me to dive beneath the waves.

G'Night, Ev'ry-Buddy!

*static*

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 02:47 AM (Ckg4U)

647 start with "lady's" Lincoln. ladies is plural you idiot. (that's what i get for poasting s*ber)

mid/late 80's, i w*rked repo in Lost Angels... all over.

got a call one Caturday, since i lived near the office: get the tow truck and meet me...

we went out to Arcadia, right across from the race track, which was in session, to a wedding chapel.

there was our car, parked right in front of the doorway. there was also a cop directing traffic at the corner.

i verified the VIN, because only a fool trust a license plate, and we settled back to wait for the ceremony to start. but first we rolled to the nearest pay phone and called the Arcadia PD dispatch/desk SGT, and told them who we were, where the car was, and enough particulars that they could verify it was legit.

as we watched, the cop directing traffic pulled his brick off his belt, talked into it, listened a bit, talked again, then looked around and saw us, waved, talked one more time, then went back to directing traffic.

when we didn't see anyone else walking in, i strolled past the door, saw the soon to be unhappy couple at the alter and gave the high sign.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:49 AM (lurxo)

648 the tow truck backed up to the rear bumper, we hooked the axle and locked down the chains, then the hookers, me and another guy, hopped on the back and i raised the boom.

about this time the best man and the photographer came out to intervene (good luck with that) and we told them it was a repo. "but she's rich!" i said "of course she is, she doesn't pay her bills..."

they yelled for the cop, who just turned and waved to them, then went back to directing traffic... and we drove off into the sunset with the car and all the presents inside.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:52 AM (lurxo)

649 @642.....

Indeed, Slap.....

Golfing only abides if the stakes involve Rugs......Room tying Quality Rugs.....

Posted by: The Dude Abides at January 05, 2018 02:52 AM (JGzeX)

650 Airplane!

Win one for the Zipper!

Posted by: Case at January 05, 2018 02:57 AM (ZgKFD)

651 Monday morning, i'm in the office and this pissed off looking couple came in, him being rather large...

"you took my car, i'm going to sue, we have pictures!, etc"

me being me, i piped up with "you have pictures? can i get a set for my parents?"... at which point Tiny started to come across the counter and my boss hustled my smart ass into the back room.

they got ALL their property back, since the law requires it and we knew this would be a contentious repo, so we were extra careful to write it up right and safeguard everything.

they still sued... seems they claimed that we had stolen the $10K cash under the spare tire...which, remarkably enough was the balance on her loan when the bank charged it off a few years before. the judge was unimpressed, and basically told them that no one keeps 10 grand under their tire, and dismissed the case.

best part of the story? someone in the wedding party dimed her out, because the bank got a tip from someone calling and asking if they were still looking for the car, which is how we knew to be there.

karma is a bitch.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 02:59 AM (lurxo)

652 great: i type out a magnum opus, and Slapweasel goes to bed in the middle of it.

jerk.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 03:00 AM (lurxo)

653 just in time for Valentine's Day, for those of you with intimate partners of the female persuasion...

NSFW, of course.

http://www.kanojotoys.com/pussy-cat-dream-vibrator-p-4114.html

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 03:02 AM (lurxo)

654 Steve and cold bear, you like woody allen but not the Marx Brothers? WTH are you doing here? I used to read your comments. For crying out loud, woody allen? Ewww.

Posted by: The Inexplicable Dr. Julius Strangepork at January 05, 2018 03:03 AM (LLBMw)

655 I'm still here, Brother.

I've read and absorbed every bit of it.

You're not alone. I just need some sleep.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 03:19 AM (Ckg4U)

656 *pulls down the shades*

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 03:20 AM (Ckg4U)

657 Groucho Maex in character is just that, him in character.

as i understand things, he was a good guy IRL.

don't confuse the two, and you should have a blast watching their movies.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 03:26 AM (lurxo)

658 Marx

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 03:26 AM (lurxo)

659 someone else can have #666.... ima pull pitch too.

hasta, y'all.

Posted by: redc1c4 at January 05, 2018 03:27 AM (lurxo)

660 The Marx brothers movies are funny.

Posted by: Skip at January 05, 2018 03:50 AM (aC6Sd)

661 I never had the all 6 number, and don't want it

Posted by: Skip at January 05, 2018 03:52 AM (aC6Sd)

662 Lousy night and winds are still howling

Posted by: Skip at January 05, 2018 03:53 AM (aC6Sd)

663 My gift to Christian Metal-Heads...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3G8ITqvGUA

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 04:03 AM (Ckg4U)

664 A little bit closer now

Posted by: Skip at January 05, 2018 04:16 AM (aC6Sd)

665
#MakeAmericaWarmAgain

Posted by: Acme Trucking Enterprises, White Truck Division at January 05, 2018 04:20 AM (2FqvZ)

666 My favorite ManOWar song, of my seventeen favorites, has the distinction of an 'open' by Orson Welles.

His distinct voice can be heard throughout the song.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-AMi-vCfAWw

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 04:24 AM (Ckg4U)

667 No time for it now, will check it out when I gat back home.
Heading across the river and probably all next week.
Roads should be ok as they had all night to work on them.
Stay warm.

Posted by: Skip at January 05, 2018 04:42 AM (aC6Sd)

668 The Peon has landed in AJ. Won't be here long; lots of driving today.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at January 05, 2018 05:11 AM (sD2WN)

669 With apologies to NaCly Dog:

A Call to Arms. Fight all together as one to be right...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwxDZji5bJ0

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at January 05, 2018 05:28 AM (Ckg4U)

670 In case anyone is alive out there and noticed the comments going down, the proxy server was just rebooted to patch the "Meltdown" bug. Should all be happy again now.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at January 05, 2018 05:48 AM (2yngH)

671 In KFM was not one of the running jokes a trailer for the movie Catholic High School Girls in Trouble?

Posted by: rhennigantx at January 05, 2018 05:56 AM (BtQd4)

672 So cold my pecker is as white & small as a Tic Tac.

Posted by: Frosty at January 05, 2018 05:56 AM (bc2Lc)

673 Guard number one is a senior on Klahns mountain, and aspires to be a research chemist. Welcome, please, Hung Well! Guard number two is a real skating buff. A warm welcome for Long Wang! Traveling comes naturally to guard number three, as he's a licensed airplane pilot. Welcome, please, Enormous Genitals!

Posted by: rhennigantx at January 05, 2018 06:00 AM (BtQd4)

674 Saw KFM with my best friend and favorite cousin at the Apollo Drive In off 75 in Dallas TX. We had 2 6 packs of lowenbrau and a bottle of Smirnoff. It was about 40 degrees and raining and had to keep starting the car to defog the windows.

Posted by: rhennigantx at January 05, 2018 06:15 AM (BtQd4)

675 The goof part about it being so cold is that the Bald Eagles congregate near open water. We went to the Mississippi river the other day. At one of the locks about 70 adult eagles are perching on tree next to the lock. Amazing sight to see that many. I had read that one of the locks a little farther south has about 400 adults as of the count on Tuesday. We are going to road trip there next year.

Posted by: Bruce at January 05, 2018 06:17 AM (8ikIW)

676 Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T)

Well, that will wake up the dead. I'd be a good anthem for metal-heads.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at January 05, 2018 06:18 AM (hyuyC)

677 goof= good

Posted by: Bruce at January 05, 2018 06:18 AM (8ikIW)

678 Good morning!

Let's smile and be happy and strike fear in the heart of killjoy leftists everywhere.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at January 05, 2018 06:18 AM (hyuyC)

679 Very Late to this ONT, but one of my favorites for this Genre
of humor was A Funny Thing Happened on The Way to The Forum, with Zero Mostel....

Posted by: KWDreaming at January 05, 2018 06:18 AM (PafTy)

680 Not as white as it could be though.

Posted by: Thai Dick Whitening Specialist at January 05, 2018 06:19 AM (H5knJ)

681 KWDreaming

Free, I want to be Free. Great movie.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at January 05, 2018 06:25 AM (hyuyC)

682 A Funny Thing Happened on The Way to The Forum, with Zero Mostel....
Posted by: KWDreaming

The Zero Mostel and Phil Silvers scenes are great.

Posted by: Bruce at January 05, 2018 06:26 AM (8ikIW)

683 678 Good morning!

Let's smile and be happy and strike fear in the heart of killjoy leftists everywhere.
The was Andrews philosophy, be a happy warrior. Why I have never been impressed with McStain, Paul Rand, Santorum, Romney, etc. Always sad or mad about something. How can you sell a program of more freedom and less government without joy and humor. go watch a Milton Friedman video!

Posted by: rhennigantx at January 05, 2018 06:27 AM (BtQd4)

684 Wake up sleepyheads! It's after noon here already.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at January 05, 2018 06:31 AM (LjgWA)

685

*hic*

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at January 05, 2018 06:31 AM (mPeei)

686 After noon where?

*yawns*
*gets coffee*

Posted by: Lizzy at January 05, 2018 06:36 AM (W+vEI)

687 Is Huma Abedin a deformed looking fuck or is it just me?

Posted by: Tentotwo at January 05, 2018 06:37 AM (yhf6w)

688 Grateful that I was asleep and so I wasn't tempted to click on the the Penis whitier thread,. although I'm sure it was a moron classic an I congratulate Ace for the clever....uhhh... headline. Glad to know, too, that it is not only women who have stupid cosmetic procedures. ;^)

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at January 05, 2018 06:37 AM (8+Ozj)

689 Is Huma Abedin a deformed looking fuck or is it just me?
Posted by: Tentotwo

I would bet on her, but I've never seen a picture of you.

Posted by: Bruce at January 05, 2018 06:38 AM (8ikIW)

690 "Arrange food, drink and entertainment, and a sit down orgy for forty".......

Posted by: KWDreaming at January 05, 2018 06:39 AM (PafTy)

691 I would bet on her, but I've never seen a picture of you.
Posted by: Bruce at January 05, 2018 06:38 AM (8ikIW)
...............
LOL...

Posted by: Tentotwo at January 05, 2018 06:40 AM (yhf6w)

692 Trump! is awake and at the keyboard...

Dow goes from 18,589 on November 9, 2016, to 25,075 today, for a new all-time Record. Jumped 1000 points in last 5 weeks, Record fastest 1000 point move in history. This is all about the Make America Great Again agenda! Jobs, Jobs, Jobs. Six trillion dollars in value created!

Posted by: Bruce at January 05, 2018 06:40 AM (8ikIW)

693 It's after noon in Rome, but please do bring another cup of coffee if you have it.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at January 05, 2018 06:41 AM (LjgWA)

694 Bander, have you been following news reports about the storm? Scituate got pummeled. A sea wall gave way, TK's lost their deck, Front Street was completely flooded. The harbormaster fell in the water but the Mill Wharf manager pulled him out.

Posted by: bluebell at January 05, 2018 06:42 AM (kNasr)

695 Sure!
*pushes mug thru usb to Bander*

Looking a pics from coastal New England...planning another indoor day.

Posted by: Lizzy at January 05, 2018 06:44 AM (W+vEI)

696 Lizzy, how did you all do in the storm? Everything okay there?

Posted by: bluebell at January 05, 2018 06:45 AM (kNasr)

697 Every good comedy begins with a funeral and ends with a wedding.

Posted by: JAS at January 05, 2018 06:48 AM (7JbXq)

698 My sister escaped the cold of Wisconsin for Cocoa Beach.

CB had a high yesterday of 49 degrees. Better then 5 below, but a little chilly for FL

Posted by: Bruce at January 05, 2018 06:48 AM (8ikIW)

699 Niagara Falls currently looks like Narnia:

https://tinyurl.com/yd9wd87l

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at January 05, 2018 06:49 AM (8+Ozj)

700 Have a serene day. May the Trader Joe's near you be open and have bread and wine on the shelves.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at January 05, 2018 06:49 AM (hyuyC)

701 bluebell....Flooding in north shore thanks to storm surge yesterday, Plum Island evacuated, Gloucester hs parking flooded w/parked cars barely visible. Total mess!

Posted by: Lizzy at January 05, 2018 06:50 AM (W+vEI)

702 687 Is Huma Abedin a deformed looking fuck or is it just me?
Posted by: Tentotwo at January 05, 2018 06:37 AM (yhf6w)
_______________

I don't see her as deformed looking. The neon red lipstick she wears is pretty garish, but otherwise she looks okay to me. She has nice hair.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at January 05, 2018 06:51 AM (fqUgw)

703 We're fine - still have power and only dealing with snow (phew).

Posted by: Lizzy at January 05, 2018 06:52 AM (W+vEI)

704 Dow goes from 18,589 on November 9, 2016, to 25,075 today, for a new all-time Record. Jumped 1000 points in last 5 weeks, Record fastest 1000 point move in history. This is all about the Make America Great Again agenda! Jobs, Jobs, Jobs. Six trillion dollars in value created!

Posted by: Bruce at January 05, 2018 06:40 AM (8ikIW)


Yeah, yeah, yeah. How about making America warm again?

Posted by: Acme Trucking Enterprises, White Truck Division at January 05, 2018 06:52 AM (2FqvZ)

705 Touching story:

Man marries his fiancee in hospital just hours before she dies:

https://tinyurl.com/yaskp947

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at January 05, 2018 06:52 AM (8+Ozj)

706 Lizzy, I saw the pics from Plum Island. Yikes. And all the pics of icy chunks floating in water down the streets, everywhere. My daughter lives in the highest point in Boston so has been fine, and all our South Shore friends have been fine too, thank goodness. What a mess though!

Posted by: bluebell at January 05, 2018 06:53 AM (kNasr)

707
w/parked cars barely visible. Total mess!

Posted by: Lizzy
______________________

*Smiles and rubs hands together*

Awe,, too bad...

Posted by: Used car salesmen everywhere at January 05, 2018 06:53 AM (mPeei)

708 *waves at bluebell*

Yeah, I haven't really been following news, but a bunch of my peeps from the South Shore have been posting videos. It's astounding. Some from P-town and Nantucket, too. That must be ghastly.

Everything's flooded and someone said the wind chill is going to -26.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at January 05, 2018 06:54 AM (LjgWA)

709 Lizzy, glad you're okay and still have power. I wonder how JackStraw is doing. Things got pretty awful in Rhode Island. Hope he and his puppy still have power.

Posted by: bluebell at January 05, 2018 06:54 AM (kNasr)

710 Bander, I'm going to send you a video through email.

Posted by: bluebell at January 05, 2018 06:55 AM (kNasr)

711 Glad your daughter and friends are safe! The flooding is bad...

Posted by: Lizzy at January 05, 2018 06:56 AM (W+vEI)

712 Cute video (Scroll down) Adorable dog learns how to bowl:

https://tinyurl.com/ya7rsa6f

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at January 05, 2018 06:57 AM (8+Ozj)

713 My favorite ManOWar song, of my seventeen favorites, has the distinction of an 'open' by Orson Welles.

My friends and I spent a summer where that cassette rarely left the tape deck. That and Peace Sells. Good times.

Posted by: Son of Sam the Butcher at January 05, 2018 07:00 AM (VJBq9)

714 Thanks for the video, bluebell.

Icebergs floating down front street. Next thing you'll see is Leo DeCaprio turning blue and dying in front of Riva.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at January 05, 2018 07:01 AM (LjgWA)

715 Well, I won't be seeing it, Bander. We got the heck out of town on Wednesday, cutting short our visit by a day. Thank goodness.

Posted by: bluebell at January 05, 2018 07:04 AM (kNasr)

716 You are being lied to about Dreamers. They are poor, they are not assimilated, they are not educated.
However, the DACA beneficiaries comprise only one-third of the roughly 1.78 million young illegals who are aged 15 or older in September 2017, according to the MPI data. If the roughly 30,000 DACA beneficiaries with four-year college degrees are compared to this larger group of 1.78 million, then only 1.7 percent of young dreamer illegals aged 15 to 32 hold four-year college degrees.

That dreamer graduation rate is just one-tenth of the 17 percent of similar-aged Americans who hold four-year college degrees.

Posted by: rhennigantx at January 05, 2018 07:08 AM (BtQd4)

717 hings got pretty awful in Rhode Island.

If you saw someone out windsurfing in it, that was a friend of mine. He loves the hurricanes, too.

Posted by: t-bird at January 05, 2018 07:09 AM (clYld)

718 Fen, that dog bowling video is just precious. Thank you. What a cute dog. And I had no idea college's had bowling teams.

Posted by: bluebell at January 05, 2018 07:12 AM (kNasr)

719 >>If you saw someone out windsurfing in it, that was a friend of mine. He loves the hurricanes, too.


There were two guys surfing at Beverly's West Beach yesterday.

Posted by: Lizzy at January 05, 2018 07:13 AM (W+vEI)

720 If you saw someone out windsurfing in it, that was a friend of mine. He loves the hurricanes, too.
Posted by: t-bird at January 05, 2018 07:09 AM (clYld)
-----

Are you kidding? He's actually nuts enough to voluntarily get in the water in storms like this? Crazy.

Posted by: bluebell at January 05, 2018 07:13 AM (kNasr)

721 Mornin' Horde. Anyone check if JJ needs thawing out?

Posted by: Brother Cavil at January 05, 2018 07:16 AM (lLeln)

722 You know, Trump! has not mentioned anything about the big storm in the NE.

He HATES black, brown, lgbtqxyz people in the NE!!

IMPEACH

Posted by: Bruce at January 05, 2018 07:16 AM (8ikIW)

723 Captain Oveur: "Joey,have you ever been in a Turkish prison?"

Posted by: Siskel and Ebert at January 05, 2018 07:17 AM (cTuj5)

724 Not kidding. He loves this stuff. It helps that he's very good, but he'll drop everything and go for hours. The stories are amazing.

Posted by: t-bird at January 05, 2018 07:18 AM (clYld)

725 That is crazy, t-bird!

Posted by: Lizzy at January 05, 2018 07:19 AM (W+vEI)

726 Ted Striker: "Surely you can't be serious?".
Dr. Rumack: "I am serious. And don't call me Shirley".

Posted by: Siskel and Ebert at January 05, 2018 07:20 AM (cTuj5)

727 My favorite line:

Have you ever see a grown man naked?

Posted by: Harry Reid at January 05, 2018 07:20 AM (MxEKc)

728 JJ's up!

Posted by: Lizzy at January 05, 2018 07:25 AM (W+vEI)

729 (353) As late as '75 or so, insurance was sold at terminals in coin operated machines. For a dime (?!).
Insert coin, get a form to fill out, drop it back in a slot on the machine and hope for the best.

And get that finger out of your ear! You don't know where that finger's been!

Posted by: Burger Chef at January 05, 2018 08:27 AM (RuIsu)

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John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat