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Tuesday Overnight Open Thread (10/17/17) Limited Content Edition

6295195.jpg

(Go ahead. Click. It's safe.)


Quotes of The Day


churchill quote.jpg

***


derek jeter quote .jpg


***


john wayne quote .jpg


The ONT couldn't have said it better Duke.


*****

It works for guns. It should work for drones as well. Moar drone control is necessary.

Federal Transport Minister Marc Garneau said he's "extremely preoccupied" by an incident that saw a small drone collide with a passenger airplane above Jean Lesage airport in Quebec City on Thursday.

"This should not have happened. That drone should not have been there," he said,

Garneau confirmed that the aircraft, a Skyjet plane, only sustained minor damage and said he was relieved that no one was hurt.

He said that "it could have been much more serious" and that if the drone had collided with the cockpit or the engine, the incident could have been "catastrophic.


Actually in Canada all you have to do is ask nicely. They'll put the drones away.

*****


How to get yourself in a world of trouble at the company's Christmas Party. How to make the perfect Gin & Tonic.

“In Spain, gin-tonic is not just a cocktail, 
it is an obsession,” says José Andrés. Here’s everything you need to know to nail this iconic drink at home—and six places in the States with excellent G&T options.

*****


What goes up must come down out.

Being an adult means learning that love can hurt from time to time. For Emma, a student teacher from Wales in the United Kingdom, that lesson was discovered the hard way.

When she and her boyfriend, Lee, were… ahem… getting intimate one night, they decided to kick things up a notch and introduce a sex toy. One thing led to another, and the sex toy in question seemingly disappeared.

Obviously, these two never learned the definition of modesty.

*****


Sometimes a man has to do what a man has to do.

A British man said he hid in the woods for 10 years to escape his wife.

Malcolm Applegate, 62, said he left his wife after she continued to argue with him over his increased work hours as a gardener, The Daily Mail reported.

“For three years it was alright, we got on with one another and the gardening got too much for her,” Applegate said.


*****


No word if this is Ace's next project or not.

*****


Oral sex. And the spread of HPV.

The most common sexually transmitted infection is becoming even more widespread in part thanks to the rise in popularity of oral sex.

From 2011 to 2014, the number of men with an oral HPV infection rose from one in 13 US men in 2012 to to one in nine, or about 11 million in total, in 2014. Roughly 7.3% of these cases were “high-risk” strains that have been known to lead to cancer.


*****


The ONT Musical Interlude



October 17, 1995, Sting's former accountant Keith Moore was sentenced to six years in jail after being found guilty of embezzling 6 million from the singer's 108 bank accounts. via thisdayinmusic.com

1 year per million. Talk about soft on crime.


***



October 17, 1987, The Bee Gees became the only group to have a UK No.1 single in each of the three decades, (60's, 70's & 80's), when 'You Win Again' went to No.1 on the UK singles chart. The brothers fifth and last No.1. via thisdayinmusic.com


Hmmmm. I did not know this.

*****


Recently The ONT covered the outrageous IRS no-bid contract to Equifax. Equifax loses no-bid contract.

The Government Accountability Office (GAO) on Monday rejected Equifax's bid to retain its $7.25 million "taxpayer identity" contract—the one awarded days after Equifax announced it had exposed the Social Security numbers and other personal data of some 145 million people.


After second bungle, IRS suspends Equifax’s “taxpayer identity” contract
At its core, the Equifax-IRS ordeal reveals the strangeness of the government contacting system. That's because Equifax wasn't even originally chosen to continue its contract with the IRS's Secure Access online program, which enables taxpayers to store and retrieve online tax records. But because Equifax protested when the agency gave the contract to rival Experian for a fraction of the cost, the IRS said contracting rules demanded that it offer a "bridge" contact to Equifax until the GAO sorts out the protest.

*****


Women like recipes. Women like religion. Women like porn. A woman of ISIS likes all three.

Airwars, an organization that tracks and monitors coalition airstrikes against ISIS, notes that in the month of August, the U.S.-led coalition hit Raqqa with more than 5,000 bombs, shells, and missiles—that would be one every eight minutes. Despite the chaos unraveling around her, she was still taking to the internet to watch endless amounts of U.S. war footage.

The hard drive is loaded with more than a terabyte of pornography. Titles include everything from “enjoy first time sex” to “make him your teacher.” There are regular visits to the pornographic site RedTube, too.
But for all the pornography, there is no lack of piety. She repeatedly tunes in to lectures by jihadist clerics linked to Islamic State and al Qaeda, figures such as the American, Anwar al Awlaki, and Hossam Abdul Raouf.

*****

Walruses. It's about time the judiciary got out of the wildlife business. Leave the experts decide which species is endangered.

The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service regularly considers adding animals that are considered to be especially vulnerable to extinction to the endangered species list, and many ecologists are upset that 25 American creatures, particularly the Pacific walrus, didn’t make the cut this year.

Amy Schumer and Lena Dunham jokes can write themselves.


*****


Technology for law enforcement. First it was the dash cam. Then the body cam. Now the gun cam.

A small number of police departments are showing interest in a new type of video camera that can be mounted directly on officers' guns, saying it may offer a better view of officer-involved shootings than body cameras. Some law enforcement officials and civil rights groups are skeptical.

Among the cons, they point out, is that gun cameras start recording only after weapons are removed from holsters and won't capture what led to officers drawing their guns, or other interactions with the public. They also say they should be used only as a complement to body cameras.


*****



Because. That's why.

*****

Tattoos. Art? Or just a remarkable identifying feature? Just ask our Genius Award Winner.

*****


Helping others become more independent, Tonight's Feel Good Story of The Day.

*****

The ONT has been brought to you by The Cold Hard Truth

need a drink .jpg


Notice: Posted with permission by AceCorp, LLC. We ID all 'ettes who appear to be 29 or younger.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at 10:06 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of page)

1 Howdy!

Posted by: Michael the Texan at October 17, 2017 10:05 PM (nvMvs)

2 First.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at October 17, 2017 10:05 PM (/qEW2)

3 Oh FFS

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at October 17, 2017 10:05 PM (/qEW2)

4 Yea ONT!

Posted by: Beartooth at October 17, 2017 10:05 PM (RKYty)

5 I think I stayed in Cheap Sleep once. Not a bad place.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois at October 17, 2017 10:05 PM (sf2BM)

6 Churchill defeated the Sonobi ad on my iPad.

Posted by: Michael the Texan at October 17, 2017 10:05 PM (nvMvs)

7 Konbanwa minna-san!

Posted by: Zettai Ryoiki at October 17, 2017 10:06 PM (e9G8E)

8 I almost shart myself waiting for it.

Posted by: Beartooth at October 17, 2017 10:06 PM (RKYty)

9 John McCain needs to give John Wayne his half-baked-nationalism speech.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I'm Dreaming of a White Privilege at October 17, 2017 10:07 PM (Nwg0u)

10 My Ghostery defeats Sonobi everytime!

Posted by: Zettai Ryoiki at October 17, 2017 10:07 PM (e9G8E)

11 Top ten

Posted by: Traveling Man at October 17, 2017 10:07 PM (ivy+W)

12 Shoot...missed by that much.

Posted by: Traveling Man at October 17, 2017 10:08 PM (ivy+W)

13 Meh, I coulda' been frist, but I read the content.

Mostly.

Posted by: Oedipus at October 17, 2017 10:08 PM (CXLVd)

14 Top 20?

Posted by: westminsterdogshow........GNAMM ette at October 17, 2017 10:09 PM (mMeIQ)

15 Holy mackerel, I gots to go to bed.

Posted by: Peaches at October 17, 2017 10:09 PM (14URa)

16 On Liberty and Security

It is not so much that those who trade in their liberty for a bit of temporary security deserve neither, it is that they will end up with neither.

http://politicalhat.com/?p=14003

Posted by: The Political Hat at October 17, 2017 10:09 PM (itfg0)

17 13 Meh, I coulda' been frist, but I read the content.

Mostly.
Posted by: Oedipus at October 17, 2017 10:08 PM (CXLVd)

Thanks, there wasn't much which allowed you a Top 20 finish.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:09 PM (4bU2r)

18 Hi

Posted by: Basement Cat at October 17, 2017 10:09 PM (3C9q2)

19 15 Holy mackerel, I gots to go to bed.
Posted by: Peaches at October 17, 2017 10:09 PM (14URa)

Oh stay up you Midwesterner

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:10 PM (4bU2r)

20 Awesome ONT. Thanks! Even has the Duke.

Posted by: Blutarski-esque 0.0 at October 17, 2017 10:10 PM (+Tibp)

21
A British man said he hid in the woods for 10 years to escape his wife.


Was she a fat woman? Was she demanding sex?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at October 17, 2017 10:10 PM (pNxlR)

22 9; John Mccain needs to go fuck himself. As bad as Keefums.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 10:10 PM (KP5rU)

23 I stand in solidarity with the victims of sexual assault, as I too have been brutalized sexually when a guy I didn't find attractive asked me for my phone number.

#MeToo

Posted by: Women using #MeToo hashtags at October 17, 2017 10:11 PM (+dsLj)

24 Someone didn't work too hard spell checking that Jeter quote. Or is that the joke?

Posted by: Eric Hoffer's Thumb at October 17, 2017 10:11 PM (lKEuo)

25 Wow--what an ONT, MisHum! Thank you!

Posted by: Ladylibertarian at October 17, 2017 10:11 PM (TdMsT)

26 You're gonna a bigger 'ette ID checking capability.

Posted by: Chief Brody at October 17, 2017 10:11 PM (DMUuz)

27 19; Yeah, Peaches. It's early.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 10:11 PM (KP5rU)

28 OH FOR FVCK's SAKE!

The Gin and Tonic is not a froo froo Spanish cocktail It is a man's drink. Manly men!

four ounces of good gin
1/2 of a lime, cut into quarters
seven ounces of a good tonic (the article got that correct)
Lots of fresh, clean American ice

Muddle the lime into the bottom of a large glass. I use a 16 ounce water glass.

Pour the gin into the glass and swirl

Pour the tonic gently down the side, conserving the fizz

Add the ice.

Drink.

Repeat as necessary.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:11 PM (wYseH)

29 Oh. My. Gosh.

It's full,of .... content!

We're not worthy, MisHum. Thank you!

Awesome Baby Sister Update follows.

Posted by: ibguy at October 17, 2017 10:12 PM (vUcdz)

30 <Whatever!

Posted by: Meremortal, with hand over heart at October 17, 2017 10:12 PM (3myMJ)

31 Thanks, there wasn't much which allowed you a Top 20 finish.


Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian


Still good stuff, and I thank you for it every night.

Mostly with my inside voice, but tonight I use my words!

Posted by: Oedipus at October 17, 2017 10:12 PM (CXLVd)

32 Anybody watch Jeopardy tonight? I'm still trying to figure out what pronoun best fits the contestant named "Fran".

Posted by: mark1971 at October 17, 2017 10:12 PM (xPl2J)

33 Baby Sister Update

From dear friend Jessica B:

"Greeting Joyce fans! Sunday was a funner than usual swim day. She chatted up a storm with a new mer-friend while she walked her water laps and I swam mine. After those laps, Joyce swam several assisted laps with her body fully extended in the water, something she has a tendency to shy away from but once she thinks through the BODY ALINGMENT and the COORDINATION of her MOTOR SKILLS she swims along saying "Thank you.... Thank you... Thank you... My body feels great! Thank you!"

We finished our swim with a (lengthy) series of aqua stretches. Something new we've added to our repertoire of ballet type stretches is one I'll call the knee hug. Standing facing the pools side and holding it for stability we stand on one foot (the left foot) and gently raise the right knee straight up towards the right shoulder. Once we've reached the full extension of that effort we embrace our knee in the crook of our right arm and gently pull our knee towards our chest (the hug) then gently leaning forward with our necks to touch our chin to our uplifted knee. Once again this was something that at first Joyce questioned me with her hesitation (and a 'look') but once she acknowledged the step-by-step process and gave herself credit for the achievement, I sensed that she was thrilled to, in fact -acknowledge, still having control of her thought process and body. By the third and fourth knee hug Joyce not only was she executing the movement with perfection, strength, range and control but she was once again saying, "Thank you...."

Something I've noticed... With exception to discomfort in her right arm (something we're working on) Joyce is regaining awareness and mobility of her right side (motors) ... Instinctively. Our spa time was time well spent as usual and the perfect refreshment and end to our day was, back at her house, a cold beer with Hubby while I clobbered her in a card game of gin.

Just for fun, please go to a secure location; a door jam, a wall, a sturdy table top... and attempt the knee hug. Please keep in mind Joyce's efforts and remind yourselves that in life that it's really the network of meaningful little things that sometime achieve the most important goals. ....Hugs"

Whew - Thank You, Jess!

[Horde: To my fellow Hordelings, thank you all in advance for your prayers and well-wishes for my sister and her family]

Posted by: ibguy at October 17, 2017 10:12 PM (vUcdz)

34 I really hope Derek Jeter didn't say exactly that. Or than. Whatevs.

Posted by: Peaches at October 17, 2017 10:12 PM (14URa)

35 evening!

Posted by: booknlass at October 17, 2017 10:12 PM (gie9o)

36 A British man said he hid in the woods for 10 years to escape his wife.

I can understand that.

Posted by: Bill Clinton at October 17, 2017 10:12 PM (+lVUW)

37 I heard about Oregon Muse today. I hope his surgery went well and I hope he recovers quickly.

I got a shoulder fracture from going down stairs head-first, and I think I broke mine on a Thursday, and got surgery on Monday.

I hope to hear from him here, SO I CAN RAG HIM TO KEEP UP THE DAMNED PT so he can recover.


Posted by: Kindltot at October 17, 2017 10:13 PM (ywxMx)

38 (Go ahead. Click. It's safe.)

Whom do you take me for, Lucy- Charlie Brown?

Posted by: t-bird at October 17, 2017 10:13 PM (Sv2/X)

39
...the Pacific walrus, didn't make the cut this year.
Amy Schumer and Lena Dunham jokes can write themselves.


Well, no. Those two are manatees.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at October 17, 2017 10:13 PM (pNxlR)

40 Great ONT MH, I love the story of the guy that would rather live in the woods than listen to his wife nag him.

Posted by: CaliGirl at October 17, 2017 10:13 PM (Ri/rl)

41 That Derek Jeter quote is kind of stupid. Only 1 person can work the hardest.

Maybe he meant "work the hardest at giving Jessica Alba herpes"?

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:13 PM (8gDQu)

42 Yeah, Peaches. It's early.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 10:11 PM (KP5rU)
Not here in India.

Posted by: Peaches at October 17, 2017 10:13 PM (14URa)

43 Oh! Two more things:

1 - If you're not on the Southwest Ohio MoMe distro list, and you *want* to be, drop me a line at swohmome at mail dot com.

B - I'm participating in Strides Against Breast Cancer on October 21.

Will you please help out by making a donation - any amount helps:

http://tinyurl.com/y9sfyn2y

Thank you!!

Posted by: ibguy at October 17, 2017 10:14 PM (vUcdz)

44 23 I stand in solidarity with the victims of sexual assault, as I too have been brutalized sexually when a guy I didn't find attractive asked me for my phone number.

#MeToo
Posted by: Women using #MeToo hashtags at October 17, 2017 10:11 PM (+dsLj)

It took all of my courage to ask Mrs. Mis Hum out on our first date. And then there is a guy like Weinstein who jacks off in front of a woman. Talk about nerve

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:14 PM (4bU2r)

45 So it's looking like after taking the house, Senate and Presidency the GOP is going to end the year with the only accomplishments being

Raise the debt ceiling
Pass a CR.
Save Obmacare Subsidies
Pass Gun Control
Save DACA

They failed to repeal Obamacare.

Tax Reform is going nowhere.

Wall funding is DOA in the Senate

And on and on.

The GOP is a useless pile of dog shit.

Posted by: Kreplach at October 17, 2017 10:14 PM (Wtll+)

46
That's not the first time some Brit gal's boyfriend got something stuck up her butt. There was a story about that a few months ago.

At least in this case the boyfriend stayed with her and took her to the ER. In that other case, he ran out after it got stuck.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:14 PM (8O3HH)

47 32: That would be Pat. Or, xhit.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 10:14 PM (KP5rU)

48 CBD said in a thread earlier today that only ONT readers were allowed to type one-handed.

Well, get to it.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at October 17, 2017 10:15 PM (DMUuz)

49 looks like I missed the Astros screwing the pooch tonight

Posted by: Boulder terlit hobo at October 17, 2017 10:15 PM (zO+RE)

50 Trish Yearwood doesn't know what a good wallop is.

I was thinking "The Quiet Man"

John Wayne: "What time is it?"

Bartender: Five o'clock.

Boom.

Victor McLaughlin got a good wallop.

Posted by: JAS at October 17, 2017 10:15 PM (QIzTH)

51 28 OH FOR FVCK's SAKE!

The Gin and Tonic is not a froo froo Spanish cocktail It is a man's drink. Manly men!

four ounces of good gin
1/2 of a lime, cut into quarters
seven ounces of a good tonic (the article got that correct)
Lots of fresh, clean American ice

Muddle the lime into the bottom of a large glass. I use a 16 ounce water glass.

Pour the gin into the glass and swirl

Pour the tonic gently down the side, conserving the fizz

Add the ice.

Drink.

Repeat as necessary.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:11 PM (wYseH)


Doesn't the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy state that for some unknown reason, every civilization in the universe has a drink known as "gin and tonic?"

Posted by: Ladylibertarian at October 17, 2017 10:15 PM (TdMsT)

52 I gots to go to bed.

Posted by: Peaches at October 17, 2017 10:09 PM (14URa)

No, No, No.

You are a Midwesterner now.

Going to bed would be impolite.

You can't be impolite. It's the law.

[what's that? Why yes, the Yankees did win...in impressive fashion!]

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:15 PM (wYseH)

53 That Derek Jeter quote is kind of stupid. Only 1 person can work the hardest. Maybe he meant "work the hardest at giving Jessica Alba herpes"?

*****************************

I always felt the confederate statues should be removed and replaced with statues of Derek Jeter. The south should know what a winner looks like again.

Posted by: Some New York Asshole waiting for his soy latte at Starbucks at October 17, 2017 10:15 PM (+dsLj)

54 Somebody sharted another thread.

Posted by: Axeman at October 17, 2017 10:15 PM (JhE5a)

55 ".....for anyone TO work harder *that* you do."

?????

Posted by: AshevilleRobert at October 17, 2017 10:15 PM (w+Jhj)

56 Doesn't the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy state that for some unknown reason, every civilization in the universe has a drink known as "gin and tonic?"
Posted by: Ladylibertarian

I think it was whiskey and soda.

Posted by: Blutarski-esque 0.0 at October 17, 2017 10:16 PM (+Tibp)

57 help us obi wan Bannon. you are our only hope

Posted by: Boulder terlit hobo at October 17, 2017 10:16 PM (zO+RE)

58 Evenin' everyone.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at October 17, 2017 10:16 PM (IcT7t)

59 Thanks for the ONT.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at October 17, 2017 10:16 PM (rb1zT)

60 Anybody who is obsessed with gin and tonics is either a drunk or has a screw loose.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 17, 2017 10:16 PM (P8951)

61
I believe that I shall turn in for the evening. Keep things down to a dull roar, will you?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at October 17, 2017 10:16 PM (pNxlR)

62 Nice ONT, MisHum. Thanks.

Posted by: Michael the Texan at October 17, 2017 10:16 PM (nvMvs)

63 46; Well, at least they weren't grabbing toilet fish out of the shitter and throwing them out the window.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 10:16 PM (KP5rU)

64 37 I heard about Oregon Muse today. I hope his surgery went well and I hope he recovers quickly.

I got a shoulder fracture from going down stairs head-first, and I think I broke mine on a Thursday, and got surgery on Monday.

I hope to hear from him here, SO I CAN RAG HIM TO KEEP UP THE DAMNED PT so he can recover.


Posted by: Kindltot at October 17, 2017 10:13 PM (ywxMx)


Wait...There was an OregonMuse announcement? Where?!

Posted by: Tami at October 17, 2017 10:17 PM (Enq6K)

65 Anybody watch Jeopardy tonight? I'm still trying to figure out what pronoun best fits the contestant named "Fran"

-
One of the big news agencies, AP Ithink, put out some rules including that a person's sex is xer biology but xer gender is is xer feelz.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I'm Dreaming of a White Privilege at October 17, 2017 10:17 PM (Nwg0u)

66 ".....for anyone TO work harder *that* you do."

?????


Posted by: AshevilleRobert at October 17, 2017 10:15 PM (w+Jhj)
Because they have more talent that you. Hoping it was just whoever created the little thingy and not Derek himself. He seems like a pretty smart dude.

Posted by: Peaches at October 17, 2017 10:17 PM (14URa)

67 Before heading to the emergency room-and risk embarrassment-Emma and Lee tried to remove the toy with several DIY methods.

++++

That didn't work, so the couple headed to the ER. After the hospital did its thing, the woman poses for pictures and an interview with an internet publication. Because that wasn't embarrassing at all.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 10:17 PM (pvjTE)

68 When she and her boyfriend, Lee, were ... ahem... getting intimate one night, they decided to kick things up a notch and introduce a sex toy. One thing led to another, and the sex toy in question seemingly disappeared.

I guess this means that there are going to be added warnings on dildos, now ...

And in the article she is smiling for the camera a lot. What the hell is she so happy about? Being one of the dumbest people on Earth? I can understand her boyfriend laughing for the camera but her ...

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:17 PM (8gDQu)

69 Am I the only one who thinks that that Welsh woman who went to the ER with a sex toy up her butt looks a little like Amy Schumer?
Also, the fact that she isn't embarrassed by it makes her even more like Schumer.

Posted by: nerdygirl at October 17, 2017 10:18 PM (+lVUW)

70 >> And in the article she is smiling for the camera a lot

It said she was a teacher, too. Imagine all the kids knowing you were the one that got the vibrator stuck up your butt.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:18 PM (8O3HH)

71 Second look at the Welsh?

Posted by: Oedipus at October 17, 2017 10:18 PM (CXLVd)

72 Leah Remini isn't doing it for me tonight. Back to the game.

Posted by: Blutarski-esque 0.0 at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (+Tibp)

73 The most common sexually transmitted infection is becoming even more widespread in part thanks to the rise in popularity of oral sex.
From 2011 to 2014, the number of men with an oral HPV infection rose from one in 13 US men in 2012 to to one in nine, or about 11 million in total, in 2014. Roughly 7.3% of these cases were high-risk strains that have been known to lead to cancer.


Life. A sexually transmitted terminal disease.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (NWiLs)

74 ONT, now with MOAR content.

Thanks, MisHum.

I've had a horrible day. Glad it's almost over.

Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (S+3Ip)

75 And in the article she is smiling for the camera a lot. What the hell is she so happy about? Being one of the dumbest people on Earth? I can understand her boyfriend laughing for the camera but her ...
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:17 PM (8gDQu)

Her parents must be so proud.

Posted by: CaliGirl at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (Ri/rl)

76
fake news cnn tonight:

President Trump Called Families of 4 Fallen Heroes After Politicizing General Kelly's Son's Death

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (SDW4a)

77 Imma savour the "content" in due time, but not Puddles! It's got big, furry 'assymetrical' balls...

Posted by: Zettai Ryoiki at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (e9G8E)

78 72
Leah Remini isn't doing it for me tonight. Back to the game.

Posted by: Blutarski-esque 0.0 at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (+Tibp)
I loved that show. Irked the snot outta me when they were all, oops, mommy dead, no big, here's Leah the Annoying.

Posted by: Peaches at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (14URa)

79 I got a shoulder fracture from going down stairs head-first, and I think I broke mine on a Thursday, and got surgery on Monday.


See, Hillary, THAT's how you do it!

Posted by: t-bird at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (kuiuS)

80 Anybody watch Jeopardy tonight? I'm still trying to figure out what pronoun best fits the contestant named "Fran"

********************************

IT works for me since it's en vogue again.

But capitalize the entire word for full effect. IT, not It, or it.

Posted by: Fuck That Noise at October 17, 2017 10:20 PM (+dsLj)

81 9 John McCain needs to give John Wayne his half-baked-nationalism speech.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I'm Dreaming of a White Privilege


McCain's sucking up to the left even more than usual. What's that about?

Posted by: nerdygirl at October 17, 2017 10:20 PM (+lVUW)

82 Gamp;T is my wife's favorite drink. I think she's only found one place ever that made it correctly. At least to her taste.

Posted by: AshevilleRobert at October 17, 2017 10:20 PM (w+Jhj)

83 The GOP is a useless pile of dog shit.
Posted by: Kreplach at October 17, 2017 10:14 PM


We need 60 seats to get anything done. Could you ring some doorbells for us? And chip in $5?

Posted by: Flaming paper bags at October 17, 2017 10:21 PM (DMUuz)

84 One of the down sides of working in a hospital X-ray film library (back in the mists of time before the current digital age) was that sometimes you pulled X-rays that were disturbing. Not just the spine with plates and what looked like woodscrews, and not the rods and chips and fragments.

One was a series of pelvic shots that showed . . . Something. I showed it to the guy next to me pulling x-rays from another case and asked what he thought it was, and he said, "some sort of surgical appliance"
I looked again and said, "No, those are C-cell batteries" and then looked at other pelvic shots and said, "and apparently this is a different model, must be a resistant learner."

In short, Anal plugs are contoured special to not get lost easily. Don't mix tools and jobs.

Posted by: Kindltot at October 17, 2017 10:21 PM (ywxMx)

85 I had a funky experience today. I had to make a decision, which was outside the box and a risk in my non-managerial position . As it happens, I'm between bosses now and so my boss is the the Division President. I told him what I did and why. He replied....."Way to go to be creative to get the job done."

It's a small validation but I will go to sleep with a smile.

Posted by: Russkilitlover at October 17, 2017 10:21 PM (99Nt9)

86 Loaded page. Last comment was CaliGirl #40 10:13 PM

Perused content. Reloaded. Last comment is Zettai Ryoiki #77 10:19 PM

But what a rich sixteen minutes it was. (Did not play videos yet.)

Good day good night good gumdrops

Posted by: mindful webworker's babbling again at October 17, 2017 10:21 PM (d/5DH)

87

Cruz is/was debating Sanders on cnn fake news. Tax reform. I don't know when.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:22 PM (SDW4a)

88 McCain's sucking up to the left even more than usual. What's that about?
Posted by: nerdygirl

Somebody posted here last week that in Arizona the Governer MUST appoint someone from the same party as the departing senator. Talk is McVain is going to switch parties on his death bed.

Posted by: Blutarski-esque 0.0 at October 17, 2017 10:22 PM (+Tibp)

89
The other Brit gal is named "Emily Georgia". Put that and Daily Mail in the search box and you'll get the DM story.

This one was one of those "jewel princess plugs" (a friend tells me this nomenclature, I assure -- I don't know anything about this kid of stuff. Promise. )

Her idiot boyfriend just rammed it too hard and then got scared and ran off.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:22 PM (8O3HH)

90 The GOP is a useless pile of dog shit.

-
But do they clean it up? NOOOOOOOOOOO!

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I'm Dreaming of a White Privilege at October 17, 2017 10:22 PM (Nwg0u)

91 Have the NFL players decided yet whether their protest is a floor wax or a dessert topping?

Posted by: JuJuBee, just generally being shamey at October 17, 2017 10:23 PM (2NqXo)

92 McCain's sucking up to the left even more than usual. What's that about?

*************************

Proof positive brain diseases causes leftism.

Posted by: A Useless Pile of Dog Shit at October 17, 2017 10:23 PM (+dsLj)

93 But for all the pornography, there is no lack of piety.
***
Well hell, she isn't going to get 72 virgins in the after life so why not enjoy a little porn now?

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 10:23 PM (Z8FFX)

94 With regards to the working hard quote, you can work as hard as you'd like but if there is no underlying talent or apptitide then you'll just be spinning your wheels.

I got a desire late in life to learn how to play the piano, been playing now for a little over three years.

I practice and play as often as I can...

...and after three years, I'm really good at reading sheet music but not a very good player and have discovered that I have no underlying aptitude for playing the piano.

Posted by: Kreplach at October 17, 2017 10:23 PM (Wtll+)

95 Ah alcohol. The cause and cure of so many of life's problems.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 10:23 PM (NWiLs)

96 I have a raging headache and need to go ice my hip (not a euphemism) and dial it down. Via con carnes, amigos!

Posted by: Peaches at October 17, 2017 10:23 PM (14URa)

97 Imagine all the kids knowing you were the one that got the vibrator stuck up your butt.
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:18 PM


You have no idea.

Posted by: Richard Gere at October 17, 2017 10:23 PM (DMUuz)

98 I agree wholeheartedly with John Wayne on the subject of not being ashamed of my flag or my country.

Any shame lies directly on the shoulders of those who who do her harm.

Despite the current woes, this is still the most exceptional country on the planet, populated by an extraordinary people.

It's our and succeeding generations responsibility to see it remains so.

Posted by: irongrampa at October 17, 2017 10:23 PM (S/hVx)

99 Anybody watch Jeopardy tonight? I'm still trying to figure out what pronoun best fits the contestant named "Fran"

LOL. I was having the same discussion, here.

The ending was classic. The pilot was the only one who made a half-decent guess. The other two deserved the 0s they got. They did earn them. Azherbaijan ... and whatever that thing wrote down ... WTFF?

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:23 PM (8gDQu)

100 48 CBD said in a thread earlier today that only ONT readers were allowed to type one-handed.
Well, get to it.
Posted by: Duncanthrax at October 17, 2017 10:15 PM (

aren't you going to wait for buzzion to get here so he can watch?

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 17, 2017 10:24 PM (hscyr)

101 23 I stand in solidarity with the victims of sexual assault, as I too have been brutalized sexually when a guy I didn't find attractive asked me for my phone number.

#MeToo
Posted by: Women using #MeToo hashtags


You think I found him attractive?
I'm still in therapy.

Posted by: The ficus at October 17, 2017 10:24 PM (+lVUW)

102 Creepy clown song was enjoyable.

Posted by: Beartooth at October 17, 2017 10:24 PM (RKYty)

103 Anybody watch Jeopardy tonight? I'm still trying to figure out what pronoun best fits the contestant named "Fran"

It shouldn't be confusing. Even when John Wayne was "Marion", was there ever any doubt?

Posted by: t-bird at October 17, 2017 10:24 PM (H0quv)

104 Like the Welsh chick, Lamar Alexander probably lost his vibrator during sex with Murray, and he thinks bailing out ZeroCare will help him get it back.

Et voila, the GOP treachery CAN be explained, after all.

Posted by: Barack Obama is a bad, bad man at October 17, 2017 10:24 PM (uLWyW)

105

Wait...There was an OregonMuse announcement? Where?!

Posted by: Tami at October 17, 2017 10:17 PM (Enq6K)


it was in the morning rant

I just heard from OregonMuse's son, who tells me that his father is comfortable with sharing some details of his temporary hiatus from AoSHQ.

Several days ago OM fell and dislocated and broke his shoulder. Ouch! The catalyst was a medical issue that has been identified and will be managed. Luckily, OregonMuse seems to have married quite well (and above his station) and his wife sprang into action and got him squared away.

Posted by: Kindltot at October 17, 2017 10:24 PM (ywxMx)

106 Wait...There was an OregonMuse announcement? Where?!

Posted by: Tami at October 17, 2017 10:17 PM (Enq6K)

++++

Chimp thread. 3rd post of the day.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 10:24 PM (FUu/Z)

107 74 ONT, now with MOAR content.

Thanks, MisHum.

I've had a horrible day. Glad it's almost over.
Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (S+3Ip)

So the brought to you by is for you?
Enjoy!!!

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:25 PM (4bU2r)

108 Not that I'm counting my chickens before they hatch, but what are the Arizona succession rules?

Posted by: Jean at October 17, 2017 10:25 PM (9TU00)

109 The one time Dallas Stars coach had a good one.

Hard work beats talent if talent doesn't work hard.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at October 17, 2017 10:25 PM (gC2IV)

110 Because athletes do have to work hard to reach the pro level, I've noticed they usually tend to discount their genetic gifts. if you don't have good hand-eye coordination, you can spend 14 hours a day in a batting cage or trying to hit tennis balls off a backboard and you ain't gonna be Jeter or one of the Williams sisters. A 5'8" inch guy who is set on becoming a NBA player better have a plan B.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 17, 2017 10:25 PM (P8951)

111 89
The other Brit gal is named "Emily Georgia". Put that and Daily Mail in the search box and you'll get the DM story.

Her idiot boyfriend just rammed it too hard and then got scared and ran off.
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:22 PM (8O3HH)


He probably shouldn't have used the mallet to get it in deeper.

Posted by: Michael the Texan at October 17, 2017 10:25 PM (nvMvs)

112 "Sure I wave the American flag. Do you know a better flag to wave?"

I would put it this way. Name one other country that hasn't been infinitely more grotesque than whatever you are accusing us of being. And why haven't you moved there?

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at October 17, 2017 10:25 PM (/qEW2)

113 the rise in popularity of oral sex.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (NWiLs)

Oh...BULLSHIT!

Oral sex has been very popular for a very long time, and blaming this on some increase in its popularity, without some pretty fvcking powerful data to back it up is just wish-casting and obfuscating.

HPV is increasing because THAT'S WHAT DISEASES DO!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:25 PM (wYseH)

114

btw, was I right or was I right?

I told you that very soon accusations of sexual misconduct will come out against Bob Weinstein. And I told you the source would be his brother. Payback.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:26 PM (SDW4a)

115 Leah Remini isn't doing it for me tonight. Back to the game.
Posted by: Blutarski-esque 0.0


I always thought she was hot, back in the, what was it, "King of Queens" days?

Then, for some reason, I happened to catch her on some reality show about her and her fiance or new husband or somesuch who seemed like a really nice guy, very handsome, I'm recalling maybe hispanic-ish (no idea how I even saw it, musta just been on in the background and I left it on because of her)...and the episode was about her wanting to get pregnant. The doctor told her that they needed to be getting busy and having THE SEX so many times per week/day during the fertile period, and she fucking rolled her eyes and mouthed something really snarky and nasty.

And that killed that fantasy. What a nasty piece of work. Not only to be that way about it, but doing so in front of her husband, and on camera to be played, and not even thinking twice about it, her first instinct was to just blurt out how much of a bother it was for everybody in earshot. What a fucking cold, miserable fish. Poor fucking guy.

Posted by: Oedipus at October 17, 2017 10:26 PM (CXLVd)

116 Is it really safe to click on the top picture or is it Yoko Ono clearing her throat?

Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:26 PM (S+3Ip)

117 Just for fun, please go to a secure location; a door jam, a wall, a sturdy table top... and attempt the knee hug. Please keep in mind Joyce's efforts and remind yourselves that in life that it's really the network of meaningful little things that sometime achieve the most important goals. ....Hugs"

Whew - Thank You, Jess!

[Horde: To my fellow Hordelings, thank you all in advance for your prayers and well-wishes for my sister and her family]
Posted by: ibguy at October 17, 2017 10:12 PM (vUcdz)


Joyce is such an inspiration, Ibguy! Prayers continue!

Posted by: Ladylibertarian at October 17, 2017 10:27 PM (TdMsT)

118 107 Cheers to you too!

Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:28 PM (S+3Ip)

119 I would like for irongrampa and John McCain to get locked in a cabin for a weekend. Soon, before the tumor wins.

Posted by: t-bird at October 17, 2017 10:28 PM (7ulel)

120 Kreplach

Posted by: nerdygirl, at October 17, 2017 10:28 PM (+lVUW)

121 I just heard from OregonMuse's son, who tells me that his father is comfortable with sharing some details of his temporary hiatus from AoSHQ.

Several days ago OM fell and dislocated and broke his shoulder. Ouch! The catalyst was a medical issue that has been identified and will be managed. Luckily, OregonMuse seems to have married quite well (and above his station) and his wife sprang into action and got him squared away.

Posted by: Kindltot at October 17, 2017 10:24 PM (ywxMx)


Oh man...poor thing! Ouch is right.

Imma get him one of those 'grab it' thingies.

Posted by: Tami at October 17, 2017 10:28 PM (Enq6K)

122 >> Oral sex has been very popular for a very long time,

Oral sex is the "safest" there is, actually. Yes, you can catch shit, anything can, but statistically, the chances of transmission of STDs are the lowest of anything.

Butt stuff is the riskiest by far (being a "catcher").

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:28 PM (8O3HH)

123 116 Is it really safe to click on the top picture or is it Yoko Ono clearing her throat?

Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:26 PM (S+3Ip)

++++

Safe. Youtube clip of Willie Nelson.

Unless that triggers you...

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 10:28 PM (pvjTE)

124 Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a malignant traitor.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) at October 17, 2017 10:28 PM (h9QN9)

125 HPV is increasing because THAT'S WHAT DISEASES DO!

********************************

This is really going to put a damper on hooker night for me.

Posted by: Still Single because of my healthy sense of self-preservation at October 17, 2017 10:29 PM (+dsLj)

126 I told you that very soon accusations of sexual misconduct will come out against Bob Weinstein. And I told you the source would be his brother. Payback.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:26 PM (SDW4a)


Did you read the article? Those accusations were laughable. He kept asking her out to dinner. That was the big thing.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:29 PM (8gDQu)

127 For the record: So is Hillary Clinton.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) at October 17, 2017 10:29 PM (h9QN9)

128 116 Is it really safe to click on the top picture or is it Yoko Ono clearing her throat?
Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:26 PM (S+3Ip)

On my Mother's grave, it is safe.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:29 PM (4bU2r)

129 Sorry. Hit "return".
The GOP are professional politicians who haven't got a clue why people despise politicians.

Posted by: nerdygirl at October 17, 2017 10:29 PM (+lVUW)

130 113 the rise in popularity of oral sex.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (NWiLs)

Oh...BULLSHIT!

Oral sex has been very popular for a very long time, and blaming this on some increase in its popularity, without some pretty fvcking powerful data to back it up is just wish-casting and obfuscating.

HPV is increasing because THAT'S WHAT DISEASES DO!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:25 PM (wYseH)

Dude... What are you yelling at me for?

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 10:29 PM (NWiLs)

131 Darn it Cubbies

Posted by: westminsterdogshow........GNAMM ette at October 17, 2017 10:29 PM (mMeIQ)

132 I love gin & tonics. I didn't know they were popular in Spain though. Gotta agree with CBD that it is best kept simple.

Posted by: Hobo with a laptop at October 17, 2017 10:29 PM (Dgce0)

133 Soon, before the tumor wins.
Posted by: t-bird

Someone posted that when he gave the speech attacking Trump he wore a sweater under his suitcoat to give himself a more buffed appearance.

So evidently it is taking it's toll.

Posted by: Blutarski-esque 0.0 at October 17, 2017 10:29 PM (+Tibp)

134 sorry to hear about OM!!!

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 17, 2017 10:29 PM (P8951)

135 28 The Gin and Tonic is not a froo froo Spanish cocktail It is a man's drink. Manly men!

four ounces of good gin
1/2 of a lime, cut into quarters
seven ounces of a good tonic (the article got that correct)
Lots of fresh, clean American ice

Adorn with a paper umbrella

*waves at CBD*

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (0ogQG)

136 I think she's only found one place ever that made it correctly. At least to her taste.

Posted by: AshevilleRobert at October 17, 2017 10:20 PM (w+Jhj)

Send her to me.

I guess you can come too if you bring some good BBQ.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (wYseH)

137 122 >> Oral sex has been very popular for a very long time,

Oral sex is the "safest" there is, actually. Yes, you can catch shit, anything can, but statistically, the chances of transmission of STDs are the lowest of anything.

Butt stuff is the riskiest by far (being a "catcher").
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:28 PM (8O3HH)

Oral sex. Is that when you talk about it?

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (4bU2r)

138 With regards to the working hard quote, you can work as hard as you'd like but if there is no underlying talent or apptitide then you'll just be spinning your wheels.
***
I remember coming across this covered in Lloyd Alexander's Prydain Chronicles.

The protagonist tries a number of trades and even with hard work proves to be poor at all of them...until he finds one he is good at...and its a heckuva a one to be good at.

Its a shame that few people are aware of the series...I thought it was GREAT young adult fiction when I was a young adult...

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (Z8FFX)

139 So Sherrif Joe just has to go registrar as a Democrat'

Posted by: Jean at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (9TU00)

140 Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:22 PM (8O3HH)

Oh my, she's afraid of needles but she's not afraid of that thing shoved up her butt. Makes total sense.

Her parents also must be so proud.

Posted by: CaliGirl at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (Ri/rl)

141 aww shit i missed peaches!

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (hscyr)

142

Did you read the article?


What is this 'read' you speak of?

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:31 PM (SDW4a)

143 136 I think she's only found one place ever that made it correctly. At least to her taste.

Posted by: AshevilleRobert at October 17, 2017 10:20 PM (w+Jhj)

Send her to me.

I guess you can come too if you bring some good BBQ.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (wYseH

Oh fuck here we go with the Mustard/No mustard BBQ wars.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:31 PM (4bU2r)

144 >>Don't mix tools and jobs.

I know, fucking amateurs. I'ma gonna have to have another damn seminar or something for these little green butts.

Posted by: Roxy Raye at October 17, 2017 10:31 PM (8O3HH)

145 I have a question. Not being ... conversant or adept in the practice of inserting foreign items in the out door so to speak.
How does said foreigner get stuck? Would it not be removed in the normal course of events, along with ... shit?

That's one seriously messed up broad. Home slice needs help too. Jeeze Louise

Posted by: Common Tater at October 17, 2017 10:31 PM (ke5UQ)

146 Did you read the article? Those accusations were laughable. He kept asking her out to dinner. That was the big thing.
***
Well that didn't stop them from trying the same thing against Trump...

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 10:31 PM (Z8FFX)

147 Adorn with a paper umbrella

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (0ogQG)

Hah!

My old and lamentably retired bartender used to try to embarrass me all of the time with weird drinks, and he went through a paper umbrella phase.

Fvck it...the drinks were usually great, so I didn't give a shit.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:31 PM (wYseH)

148 Willie Nelson is pretty cool for an old guy.

I think I'll change out the Carpenters CD in the Camry for one of his.

Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:31 PM (S+3Ip)

149 116 116 Is it really safe to click on the top picture or is it Yoko Ono clearing her throat?

Posted by: ALH


Almost as bad -- Willie Nelson.

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 17, 2017 10:32 PM (0ogQG)

150 I've had exactly one gin and tonic, when an Aussie and I toasted the Queen Mother after her passing.

Posted by: Vendette at October 17, 2017 10:32 PM (nXoiZ)

151 How does said foreigner get stuck? Would it not be removed in the normal course of events, along with ... shit?
___
Look, you have to get the right ones for the backdoor. Its like getting a hammer when you really need a...um...what's another actual tool Reggie?

TEEHEEE

Besides Trump!

Posted by: barack Obama at October 17, 2017 10:32 PM (Z8FFX)

152 I love gin and tonics. Great summer drink.

Posted by: Tami at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (Enq6K)

153 Goddamit people I'm working as fast as I can! The man is like the fucking energizer bunny!

Posted by: John McCain's Tumor at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (+dsLj)

154 I will believe that a drone hit that plane when the body of the drone is found. Otherwise, it is the pilot's word, and nothing more. Apparently, the "sighting" of a drone is the new excuse for pilot incompetence.

Posted by: Lynne at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (FYZjd)

155 aren't you going to wait for buzzion to get here so he can watch?
Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 17, 2017 10:24 PM


Are you saying one can't type one-handed on the other side?

I'm guessing that since the seventy two are virgins that something else isn't happening.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (DMUuz)

156 when an Aussie and I toasted the Queen Mother after her passing.

Posted by: Vendette at October 17, 2017 10:32 PM (nXoiZ)


How'd you get ahold of the body?

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (8gDQu)

157 "That Derek Jeter quote is kind of stupid. Only 1 person can work the hardest. "

He didn't claim otherwise.

Posted by: Going to laugh a lot at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (31+yF)

158 >> Oral sex. Is that when you talk about it?

Heh heh, heh.

You know, I may may need to modify that safest thing. If by "oral sex", we do mean talking about it, then one can be in danger of catching something...a slap to the face. .... Talking to the wrong one.

Posted by: Roxy Raye at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (8O3HH)

159

Oral sex is the "safest" there is, actually. Yes, you can catch shit, anything can, but statistically, the chances of transmission of STDs are the lowest of anything.

Butt stuff is the riskiest by far (being a "catcher").
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:28 PM (8O3HH)

Oral sex. Is that when you talk about it?
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (4bU2r)


Isn't it cute how each generation believes it is the one which discovered sex?

Posted by: Ladylibertarian at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (TdMsT)

160 The only nice thing about breaking my shoulder was I wound up eating four meals a day and lost weight because I was building bone again.

That and the permission to take naps.

Building bones is exhausting.

Posted by: Kindltot at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (ywxMx)

161 Had a guy come into the ER. We found a light bulb. Says he sat on it.

Posted by: Phildirt at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (eFXb/)

162 Canada?

Posted by: Common Tater at October 17, 2017 10:34 PM (ke5UQ)

163
I will believe that a drone hit that plane when the body of the drone is found. Otherwise, it is the pilot's word, and nothing more. Apparently, the "sighting" of a drone is the new excuse for pilot incompetence.

I concur.

Every single report of a drone colliding with a plane has been False, so far.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:34 PM (SDW4a)

164 The catalyst was a medical issue that has been identified and will be managed.

wtf? they tell you on the commercials to go to the er if your boner lasts more than 4 hours. too soon?

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 17, 2017 10:34 PM (hscyr)

165 Somebody posted here last week that in Arizona the Governer MUST appoint someone from the same party as the departing senator. Talk is McVain is going to switch parties on his death bed.

Posted by: Blutarski-esque 0.0 at October 17, 2017 10:22 PM (+Tibp)

So? Find zombie Pinochet, have him join the Democrat party, AZ gov. appoints him to Senate, and he caucuses with GOP, anyway.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 10:35 PM (O848g)

166 Oral sex. Is that when you talk about it?

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (4bU2r)


Oral sex is when you pass each other in the hall and say, "Fuck you."

[just the punchlines]

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:35 PM (8gDQu)

167 Isn't it cute how each generation believes it is the one which discovered sex?

Yes, Mom and Dad only did it once per kid.

They were all winners!

Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:35 PM (S+3Ip)

168
Sock fail, again. I'm gonna get put on double secret sock probation. Of course with ol' "RR", it works, talking about her might get you slapped.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:35 PM (8O3HH)

169 How would a demonrat be worse than John Fucking Mccain?

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 10:35 PM (KP5rU)

170 Its a shame that few people are aware of the series...I thought it was GREAT young adult fiction when I was a young adult...
Posted by: 18-1


I enjoyed them while a youth, and I pass these gems on to my kids. My oldest son has read them, my younger one will be ready soon (possibly now, come to think of it).

We still make Gurgi jokes ("crunchings and munchings!") every now and again.

Posted by: Oedipus at October 17, 2017 10:35 PM (CXLVd)

171 I've read some arguments that monogamy and sexual modesty were partially a way to try and stem the rise of STDs.

When you've got small isolated tribes diseases don't spread but when they start trading they'll start trading other things* and soon every Cromagnon in Spain has pre historic gonorrhea or whatever the disease of the day was.

*Ugg loyal to spouse....when Ugg not on business trip!

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 10:35 PM (Z8FFX)

172 or McCain could be wearing sweater for the same reason I see old people wearing winter coats around here when it's 65 degrees out - because he's cold all the time.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 17, 2017 10:36 PM (P8951)

173 So? Find zombie Pinochet, have him join the Democrat party, AZ gov. appoints him to Senate, and he caucuses with GOP, anyway.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM

Brilliant!! Is the Governor of Arizona REP or DEM? I don't know.

Posted by: Blutarski-esque 0.0 at October 17, 2017 10:36 PM (+Tibp)

174 Oral sex. Is that when you talk about it?
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:30 PM (4bU2r)

That's about as close as I'm going to get these days.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 10:36 PM (NWiLs)

175 How would a demonrat be worse than John Fucking Mccain?
***
Being stabbed in the front would be a refreshing change.

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 10:36 PM (Z8FFX)

176 Every single report of a drone colliding with a plane has been False, so far.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:34 PM (SDW4a)

And even if it did happen...I have seen the commercial drones. They are ultra-lightweight machines that will break if they hit anything, much less a jet's windshield.

They hit those fuckers with birds to test them, and they don't break.

The last thing in the world I am worried about when I fly is some retard's drone he is using to see the MILF next door.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:36 PM (wYseH)

177 Gin Gimlets > Gin and Tonic

Posted by: Kreplach at October 17, 2017 10:37 PM (Wtll+)

178 when an Aussie and I toasted the Queen Mother after her passing.



Posted by: Vendette at October 17, 2017 10:32 PM (nXoiZ)



How'd you get ahold of the body?

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (8gDQu)

Posted by: Vendette at October 17, 2017 10:37 PM (nXoiZ)

179 thanks to the rise in popularity of oral sex.

Oral sex?

Posted by: Charlie Gibson at October 17, 2017 10:37 PM (YXJ+5)

180 Had a guy come into the ER. We found a light bulb. Says he sat on it.

**********************

Well at least you can unscrew a light bulb, unlike a pregnant woman.

Posted by: Weinstein's Secret Book of Untasteful Jokes at October 17, 2017 10:37 PM (+dsLj)

181 119 I would like for irongrampa and John McCain to get locked in a cabin for a weekend. Soon, before the tumor wins.
Posted by: t-bird at October 17, 2017 10:28 PM (7ulel)

why do you want to torture irongrampa like that?

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 17, 2017 10:37 PM (hscyr)

182 Samantha Power. Paraphrased. 'Most of the unmasking requests made under my name were not made by me.'

http://tinyurl.com/ycoo6omv

This gets even worse. The unmasking of names is supposed to be done by a small group who have the authority to do it. If others were given the ability to unmask in the name of one of the principals then there is no real limit on how many people could unmask the incidentals collected. And no way to know who they are.

Obama greatly expanded the number of people who could access, on an ipad or such, anywhere, the Presidential Daily Brief which is classified at the highest level. The unmasked names would be in this electronic document. Were all the 30+ people who got the Brief authorized to use the name of a principal to unmask? Were even more people? For either access to the Brief or to do unmaskings?

Hillary sacrificed all national security to hide corrupt financial dealings enriching her. Did Obama sacrifice national security to do political warfare using national intelligence agencies as his witting or unwitting dupes?

Posted by: geoffb at October 17, 2017 10:38 PM (zOpu5)

183 Re stabbing in the back. As someone said about Donny Two Scoops, he is not a backstabber. He'll stab you right in the front, if he's gonna stab.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:38 PM (8O3HH)

184 Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 10:35 PM (Z8FFX)

That crazy outdated thing called heterosexuality is also a good way of limiting STDs.

Men have no limits on their sexual desire, so when they desire other men it gets ugly.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:38 PM (wYseH)

185 How does said foreigner get stuck?

Prisoner Of Love

Posted by: Duncanthrax at October 17, 2017 10:38 PM (DMUuz)

186 I suspect our department will go to body cameras on day. But, I don't want a camera mounted on a Glock. Hell, I don't even want a light on a Glock.

Posted by: Eromero at October 17, 2017 10:38 PM (zLDYs)

187 If I recall correctly, that picture of Winnie was unusual in that the photographer snatched his cigar away from him and snapped the shutter at the same time.

An interesting story, during World War II he was getting ready to sail back to England when he happened to see one of those flying boats (PBY?) and struck up a conversation with the pilot "a man of good quality", and started asking about the range and such. So he decides to fly back. Well they got a little off the beam, and were nearly shot down as enemy aircraft.

Posted by: Common Tater at October 17, 2017 10:39 PM (ke5UQ)

188 Isn't it cute how each generation believes it is the one which discovered sex?
***
In fairness there was some difference prior to the availability of the pill and condoms.

Plenty of girls went to go visit their aunt for a few months before they became a umm....sister back in the day. But my understanding is that in the 50s there was a whole lot of "heavy petting" which I believe Bill Clinton taught us is NOT sex.

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 10:39 PM (Z8FFX)

189
Isn't it cute how each generation believes it is the one which discovered sex?



Yes, Mom and Dad only did it once per kid.



They were all winners!



Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:35 PM (S+3Ip)


Fraternal twins FTW!

Posted by: Vendette at October 17, 2017 10:39 PM (nXoiZ)

190 172 or McCain could be wearing sweater for the same reason I see old people wearing winter coats around here when it's 65 degrees out - because he's cold all the time.
Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 17, 2017 10:36 PM (P8951)

Or he doesn't have a soul.
But that's just the misanthropic side of me.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:39 PM (4bU2r)

191 Too bad Jeter cant put together a grammatically correct sentence to share his "wisdom."

Posted by: San Franpsycho at October 17, 2017 10:39 PM (EZebt)

192 Baby killer Patrick Tomlinson made a big Twatter splash today with his thought experiment about a fire in an artificial insemination clinic. You can either save 1000 fertilized embryos or a five year old boy. If you pick the boy, it means you know the embryos aren't alive or aren't human or something. If you could either save a five year o!d or a ninety-five year old and you choose the five year old it means great grandpa wasn't alive or wasn't human or something.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I'm Dreaming of a White Privilege at October 17, 2017 10:39 PM (Nwg0u)

193 Somebody posted here last week that in Arizona the Governer MUST appoint
someone from the same party as the departing senator. Talk is McVain
is going to switch parties on his death bed.


Won't matter if he does switch. State law specifies that if the Senator switches parties, the Governor must appoint someone from the party the Senator was in when elected.

You can read the law for yourself here: http://bit.ly/2zwnDY7

Sorry if anyone already pointed this out. I'm running behind, as usual.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at October 17, 2017 10:40 PM (IcT7t)

194 OK, guys, have any of you noticed the short haired ginger chick on the iPhone 8 commercial? To me she looks androgynous and weird and the commercial bothers me because I suspect they're trying to pass off a rather asexual look as an ideal.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 17, 2017 10:40 PM (P8951)

195

If a 1000-gram drone copter toy can cause significant damage to a commercial airliner, we're in big, big trouble.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:40 PM (SDW4a)

196 I remember back in the 80s and 90s the left swore up and down that AIDS was going to become a heterosexual disease.

Now, can you get it that way? Yes but....it isn't that likely. Heterosexuals rarely have anonymous, unprotected sex with hundreds of people in their life times.

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 10:41 PM (Z8FFX)

197
If a 1000-gram drone copter toy can cause significant damage to a commercial airliner, we're in big, big trouble.
Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:40 PM (SDW4a)


Golden BB, right?

Posted by: Kindltot at October 17, 2017 10:41 PM (ywxMx)

198 McCain could be wearing sweater for the same reason I see old people wearing winter coats around here when it's 65 degrees out - because he's cold all the time.
Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 17, 2017 10:36 PM (P8951)

Or he doesn't have a soul.

-
Or he knows where he's going and wants to get used to a warmer c!imate.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I'm Dreaming of a White Privilege at October 17, 2017 10:41 PM (Nwg0u)

199 Sorry if anyone already pointed this out. I'm running behind, as usual.
Posted by: Blanco Basura

Nope. Good stuff. I had no idea.

Posted by: Blutarski-esque 0.0 at October 17, 2017 10:41 PM (+Tibp)

200
I loathe John Kerry. I merely dislike John McCain, and refuse to celebrate in any fashion his illness.

Posted by: irongrampa at October 17, 2017 10:42 PM (S/hVx)

201 190; Satan wears Mccains' soul as a flame retardant suit when he whips Teddy stoking the furnace.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 10:42 PM (KP5rU)

202 OK, guys, have any of you noticed the short haired ginger chick on the iPhone 8 commercial? To me she looks androgynous and weird and the commercial bothers me because I suspect they're trying to pass off a rather asexual look as an ideal.

***************************************

I don't think Apple has used an actual hetero in their commercials since 2011.

Posted by: Weinstein's Secret Book of Distasteful Jokes at October 17, 2017 10:42 PM (+dsLj)

203 OK, guys, have any of you noticed the short haired ginger chick on the iPhone 8 commercial? To me she looks androgynous and weird and the commercial bothers me because I suspect they're trying to pass off a rather asexual look as an ideal.
Posted by: Donna*****V.


Forget it, Donna...it's Appletown.

Posted by: Oedipus at October 17, 2017 10:43 PM (CXLVd)

204 If a 1000-gram drone copter toy can cause significant damage to a commercial airliner, we're in big, big trouble.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:40 PM (SDW4a)


Reminds me of how they used to claim that if you turned your electronic equipment on for takeoff or landing you could crash the plane.

Sure ...

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:43 PM (8gDQu)

205 >> so when they desire other men it gets ugly.

It's un-PC, but with the light loafer-ing, the men can both pitch and catch. That spreads disease like wildfire.

Women don't have anything to "pitch" with. Well, there are accessories, but they don't transmit bodily fluids.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:43 PM (8O3HH)

206 Isn't it cute how each generation believes it is the one which discovered sex?
Posted by: Ladylibertarian at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM


True fact: The Navy invented sex.

The Marines, however, introduced it to women.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at October 17, 2017 10:43 PM (DMUuz)

207 If you could either save a five year o!d or a ninety-five year old and you choose the five year old it means great grandpa wasn't alive or wasn't human or something.
___
What if I save the hot chick first?

Posted by: Obligatory at October 17, 2017 10:43 PM (Z8FFX)

208 200
I loathe John Kerry. I merely dislike John McCain, and refuse to celebrate in any fashion his illness.
Posted by: irongrampa at October 17, 2017 10:42 PM (S/hVx

So your weekend with him is still a go?

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:43 PM (4bU2r)

209 Posted by: San Franpsycho at October 17, 2017 10:39 PM (EZebt)


San Francisco Giants: 64-98

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:43 PM (wYseH)

210 Hillary sacrificed all national security to hide corrupt financial
dealings enriching her. Did Obama sacrifice national security to do
political warfare using national intelligence agencies as his witting or
unwitting dupes?


Well, yeah.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at October 17, 2017 10:44 PM (IcT7t)

211
True fact: The Navy invented sex.

The Marines, however, introduced it to women.
Posted by: Duncanthrax at October 17, 2017 10:43 PM (DMUuz)

Hoo Rah

Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:44 PM (S+3Ip)

212 206: That is funny.

Posted by: LASue at October 17, 2017 10:44 PM (hZ+us)

213 Damn. Puddles nailed it again.

Good evening, 'rons and 'ettes.

Posted by: Captain Whitebread at October 17, 2017 10:44 PM (rJUlF)

214 How would a demonrat be worse than John Fucking Mccain?

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 10:35 PM (KP5rU)
---

is that a challenge?

if so, consider it accepted.

Posted by: The DNC at October 17, 2017 10:45 PM (UirDV)

215 OK, guys, have any of you noticed the short haired ginger chick on the iPhone 8 commercial?
____
The fashion industry has been trying to get women to get boy haircuts for decades.

For straight men the physical ideal, IIRC is a 23 year old woman. And for gay men it is a significantly younger male...

Posted by: Obligatory at October 17, 2017 10:45 PM (Z8FFX)

216 How does said foreigner get stuck?

Prisoner Of Love

Posted by: Duncanthrax at October 17, 2017 10:38 PM (DMUuz)


A little mood music:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpQiBA71NA8

Posted by: The Prisoner's Hat at October 17, 2017 10:45 PM (itfg0)

217 San Francisco Giants: 64-98

******************

Wow, I really thought Barry Bonds would turn it around this year.

Posted by: Weinstein's Secret Book of Distasteful Jokes at October 17, 2017 10:45 PM (+dsLj)

218
Oral sex. Is that when you talk about it?
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian


And you get Hearing Aids from listening to too many assholes.

Posted by: Bozo Conservative....junior assistant Redneck Deathsquad Ninja.... at October 17, 2017 10:46 PM (S6Pax)

219 I tempted to research how much of the apparent increase in oral/anal HPV disease is attributable to the normalisation, and glamourisation even, of homosexuality, but these days I'm starting to care less and less...

Posted by: Zettai Ryoiki at October 17, 2017 10:46 PM (e9G8E)

220 hi Captain Whitebread!

tonight, I brought in my big porch plant. it's friggin' yuuuge in my little house. I could use it as an early Christmas tree.

Posted by: booknlass at October 17, 2017 10:46 PM (gie9o)

221 If a 1000-gram drone copter toy can cause significant damage to a commercial airliner, we're in big, big trouble.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:40 PM (SDW4a)

It certainly could if it were ingested by a jet engine, Birds can fuck them up, too.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 10:47 PM (O848g)

222 trump
trump
trump

deport
deport
deport

Posted by: original jake at October 17, 2017 10:47 PM (a7+wS)

223 214; Good luck. There's only room enough for one Chuck You Schumer.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 10:47 PM (KP5rU)

224 155 Are you saying one can't type one-handed on the other side?
Posted by: Duncanthrax at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM

How soon they forget us. Wait! Peaches just went up bed. We can go watch her fap. See ya. Literally. Bwahaha

Posted by: The Fapping Ghosts at October 17, 2017 10:47 PM (hscyr)

225 I've given this a lot of thought, and I need to vent.

Regarding the "#MeToo" movement...

Bollox. Not "you too." At least, not in most cases. When the guy "didn't get the hint" after asking you out 8 times - because you kept saying "Sorry, I'm busy" instead of "No, Milton, I don't want to date you," that wasn't sexual harassment. Neither was the time the the creepy/nerdy IT guy looked at you from across the Christmas party (with Open Bar(TM)!).

When you went to that party and you ended up sleeping with the guy because he kept saying "pretty please" and telling you that "if you really love me, you'll have sex with me?" That wasn't coerced sex - not in the way you'd like us to believe.

When you both got drunk and had sex, and then he (or she) wasn't as good looking once the alcohol wore off - that wasn't rape. Neither was the time you had sex with that guy and only later found out he was kind of stalker-ish and creepy.

You see, harassment, coerced sex, and rape are real things that have affected real people. You attempting to claim their victim status because human beings are sexual creatures and will often be awkward in the pursuit of, or make bad choices because of, sex is gross. It demeans their real experiences - their real victimization - just so you can feel morally superior.

Stop it.

I have been lectured for the last several days - a week maybe? - that I am partly to blame simply for being a man. That any "unwanted" look, comment, or question is "sexual violence." I have been told to do anything other than humbly and mutely accept my status as The Evil Other is, itself, and act of sexual violence.

All the while, instead of finding the actual cretins who would dare actually violate the sanctity of a woman's body, you (oh, "#MeToo"-er) have been muddying the water and actually reducing the horror with which these actual monsters can be seen. Because everyone has a father, most have brothers, male cousins, uncles, nephews, and even male friends. And if all of these - who they love and know would never "purposefully" engage in violence against women - if all of these are guilty simply because they are male? Well, then, maybe everyone else is just like them - and not really all that bad.

Harvey Weinstein, Bill Clinton, Roman Polanski, and others are evil. What they did was evil. They deserve to be kicked out of the human race for what they did. But we can't do that if we're too busy blaming "all men" for what those - and those actually like them - have done.




Thus ends this rant.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) at October 17, 2017 10:48 PM (h9QN9)

226 Robert - May get some frost up at your way tonight.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at October 17, 2017 10:48 PM (7Cr6v)

227 and glamourisation even, of homosexuality, but these days I'm starting to care less
.....

the medical community checks dudes buttholes for butt warts to see if they are gay or not

Posted by: original jake at October 17, 2017 10:48 PM (a7+wS)

228 191 Too bad Jeter cant put together a grammatically correct sentence to share his "wisdom."

Posted by: San Franpsycho at October 17, 2017 10:39 PM (EZebt)

++++

Did you mean "can't"?

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 10:49 PM (FUu/Z)

229 Evening all.

Spoke with SMFH for a few minutes tonight. She said to tell you all hello.

Once I was able to successfully negotiate my way past the Grandbaby Call Screener, she let me know that's she's already made her move to Illinois to be with her daughter and grandbabies. She's also staying away from politics for a while, hence her lack of appearances around here.

Sadly, because of that, she will not be making it to the CenTexMoMee this weekend. She sends all here and who will be there her love.

Posted by: Country Boy imitating Elizabeth Warren at October 17, 2017 10:50 PM (D2vc1)

230 Somebody posted here last week that in Arizona the Governer MUST appoint
someone from the same party as the departing senator. Talk is McVain
is going to switch parties on his death bed.

Won't matter if he does switch. State law specifies that if the Senator switches parties, the Governor must appoint someone from the party the Senator was in when elected.

-
Well damn, that's the end of my murder mystery idea; In the Middle of the Road: Death of an Arizona Sidewinder.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I'm Dreaming of a White Privilege at October 17, 2017 10:50 PM (Nwg0u)

231 Good to see you, Captain.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 10:50 PM (NWiLs)

232 Goodbye Chief Diarrhea Mouth sock.

Posted by: Country Boy at October 17, 2017 10:50 PM (D2vc1)

233 I remember back in the 80s and 90s the left swore up and down that AIDS was going to become a heterosexual disease.

Now, can you get it that way? Yes but....it isn't that likely. Heterosexuals rarely have anonymous, unprotected sex with hundreds of people in their life times.

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 10:41 PM (Z8FFX)


And most heterosexuals who contracted AIDs were either junkies or can be traced back to anal sex, women with bisexual guys and then other guys having anal sex with her.

But, since the beginning of AIDs research into anal sex and transmission has been, pretty much, verboten. For something like the first twenty years you couldn't find a single study on anal sex and AIDs transmission, but you could find tons of studies and articles claiming that it was a regular, run-of-the-mill heterosexual disease that was going to kill us all ... because it had absolutely nothing to do with homosexuality. No way, no how.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:50 PM (8gDQu)

234 They have CNN on where I work, and it amuses me how hard they push the narrative.

It won't be every day that I'm tired not tired of winning, but for what Bannon calls the beginning of the end, today was good. Great work by Ace today. Bribes for uranium would not be under investigation if the bitch had won, so I count that on the winning side.

Wolfmother, Victorious

https://youtu.be/PZDg_MLmp7M

Posted by: BourbonChicken at October 17, 2017 10:50 PM (rnAwa)

235 I wonder if there was a Moron Meet Up near where I live, if I would go.

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at October 17, 2017 10:51 PM (l9m7l)

236 I've concluded that I can no longer be complicit in the Hollywood sexual assault/ rape culture. Therefore I shall no longer pay $20 for a movie ticket and another $20 for stale popcorn and a flat Diet Coke. Because I am virtuous!!

##nomorehollywoodmovies..


Posted by: LASue at October 17, 2017 10:51 PM (hZ+us)

237 225 Preach!

Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:51 PM (S+3Ip)

238 Derek's brother was once my company commander. BlackHawk pilot. Good guy.

Posted by: Common Tater at October 17, 2017 10:51 PM (ke5UQ)

239 227 and glamourisation even, of homosexuality, but these days I'm starting to care less
.....

the medical community checks dudes buttholes for butt warts to see if they are gay or not
Posted by: original jake at October 17, 2017 10:48 PM (a7+wS)

That's glamorous all right. Jeebus.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 10:52 PM (NWiLs)

240 that Tomlinson asshole thinks that other people's opinions determine whether or not you are human? Well, of course he does, that's the pro abortion argument.

But I might decide to save the 5 year old and some one else decides to save the 90 year old because it's gramps and someone decides to save the eggs that does not mean whoever is left behind is not human. He's a dumbass trying to rationalize abortion.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 17, 2017 10:52 PM (P8951)

241 Harvey Weinstein, Bill Clinton, Roman Polanski, and others are evil. What they did was evil. They deserve to be kicked out of the human race for what they did. But we can't do that if we're too busy blaming "all men" for what those - and those actually like them - have done.

Thus ends this rant.
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther)

Roman Polanski is mentally ill. Sharon Tate getting murdered in such a grotesque manner, while pregnant manner drove him mad. That excuses nothing, but he is a tragic, sick man.
Clinton and Weinstein and some others like them are criminal sociopaths. And Hillary, who was always an enabler for Bill, was almost elected President. Which just goes to show how sick politics is in this country.

Posted by: Bozo Conservative....junior assistant Redneck Deathsquad Ninja.... at October 17, 2017 10:52 PM (S6Pax)

242 @ 208


Sure. He'd come out humble man.

I can be very persuasive.

Posted by: irongrampa at October 17, 2017 10:52 PM (S/hVx)

243 You see, harassment, coerced sex, and rape are real things that have affected real people. You attempting to claim their victim status because human beings are sexual creatures and will often be awkward in the pursuit of, or make bad choices because of, sex is gross.

***************************

Reminds me of that sex harassment educational spoof vid SNL once did. They have a normal looking guy getting reported for being a sexual deviant because he said hello to a coworker, meanwhile Tom Brady was walking around in his underwear with the opposite effect.

Posted by: Weinstein's Secret Book of Distasteful Jokes at October 17, 2017 10:52 PM (+dsLj)

244 Heterosexuals rarely have anonymous, unprotected sex with hundreds of people in their life times.
Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017
.......

average gay man has a sex encounter with another dude.... average gay dude 500+ partnersw

Posted by: original jake at October 17, 2017 10:53 PM (a7+wS)

245 Well damn, that's the end of my murder mystery idea; In the Middle of the Road: Death of an Arizona Sidewinder.

You can redo it as a comedy.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at October 17, 2017 10:53 PM (IcT7t)

246 I saw Butt Warts open for Butthole Surfers at the Cow Palace. The show stunk on ice.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 10:53 PM (O848g)

247 But, since the beginning of AIDs research into anal sex and transmission has been, pretty much, verboten. For something like the first twenty years you couldn't find a single study on anal sex and AIDs transmission, but you could find tons of studies and articles claiming that it was a regular, run-of-the-mill heterosexual disease that was going to kill us all ... because it had absolutely nothing to do with homosexuality. No way, no how.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:50 PM (8gDQu)


And this insane game of make-believe continues to this very day.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 10:53 PM (NWiLs)

248 Remember that old AIDs joke from way back:



What's the hardest part about getting AIDs?

Convincing your parents that you're Haitian.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:54 PM (8gDQu)

249 217,
"San Francisco Giants: 64-98"


Detroit Tigers for the tie. 64-98

http://tinyurl.com/ycxd6gck

Posted by: geoffb at October 17, 2017 10:54 PM (zOpu5)

250 169 How would a demonrat be worse than John Fucking Mccain?

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 10:35 PM (KP5rU)

++++

Honesty. As loathsome as John Kerry is, he is, relatively speaking, more honest than John McCain about who he is and what he stands for.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 10:54 PM (pvjTE)

251 Common tater, that's cool. did he ever talk about his brother?

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 17, 2017 10:54 PM (P8951)

252 If conservatives were hobbits, then that would make McCain Sharkey.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at October 17, 2017 10:54 PM (rnAwa)

253 Are Butt warts the same thing as hemorrhoids?

Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:54 PM (S+3Ip)

254 119 I would like for irongrampa and John McCain to get locked in a cabin for a weekend. Soon, before the tumor wins.
Posted by: t-bird at October 17, 2017 10:28 PM (7ulel)

===

400 quatloos on irongrampa

Posted by: San Franpsycho at October 17, 2017 10:54 PM (EZebt)

255 It took all of my courage to ask Mrs. Mis Hum out on our first date. And then there is a guy like Weinstein who jacks off in front of a woman. Talk about nerve

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 10:14 PM (4bU2r)

I admit, sometimes I wish I had that much guts when it came to interacting with females. Not even close.

Posted by: Country Boy at October 17, 2017 10:55 PM (D2vc1)

256 Roman Polanski is mentally ill.

A man who believes he's a duck is "mentally ill."

A man who rapes a child is evil.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) at October 17, 2017 10:55 PM (h9QN9)

257

Is this the thread for anal warts?

Posted by: otho at October 17, 2017 10:55 PM (qGuLD)

258 This is a truly dark day for America's imperiled wildlife. You couldn't ask for a clearer sign that the Trump administration puts corporate profits ahead of protecting endangered species. The Pacific walrus, Florida Keys mole skink, eastern boreal toad and 22 other species are now one step closer to extinction. We're going to challenge as many of these bogus findings as we can."

========

Bleah. Consider the case of Kate Steinle. Democrats and GOPers put corporate profits and political power ahead of protecting HUMAN lives of American citizens. All the walruses in the world are not as valuable as one human life. These people are such vile, hypocritical pukes. Intolerably stupid pieces of excrement.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at October 17, 2017 10:55 PM (/qEW2)

259 She sends all here and who will be there her love.

Tell her it is returned in kind, tenfold.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at October 17, 2017 10:56 PM (IcT7t)

260 Heterosexuals rarely have anonymous, unprotected sex with hundreds of people in their life times.

**********************

I had an eye opener about this when I learned women have ten times the risk of contracting HIV (or something along those lines) than men do. Men could plug 10 HIV infected women in a row and not get the plague.

Oddly enough i learned all this at a law enforcement seminar, whereas prior to that my high school education taught me I'd get AIDS if I sneezed on a girl.

Posted by: Weinstein's Secret Book of Distasteful Jokes at October 17, 2017 10:56 PM (+dsLj)

261 Hi Horde!
Ibguy, glad Joyce is doing so well. Good to hear from you.
Oregon Muse, prayers for a speedy complete recovery from your shoulder surgery. I've heard the PT is arduous, but essential, so hang in there.
Mus Hum, thanks for another great ONT. Always interesting reading.
Joy and Blessings to you all, and to all a good night!

Posted by: Just wondering at October 17, 2017 10:56 PM (WBYpW)

262 Are Butt warts the same thing as hemorrhoids?
Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:54 PM


No. Hemorrhoids are vascular. Butt warts are viral.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at October 17, 2017 10:57 PM (DMUuz)

263 The Pacific walrus, Florida Keys mole skink, eastern boreal toad and 22 other species are now one step closer to extinction.

It's about time.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:57 PM (8gDQu)

264 258 And they underwrite Planned Parenthood keeping the doors open.

Posted by: ALH at October 17, 2017 10:57 PM (S+3Ip)

265 231 Good to see you, Captain.
Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 10:50 PM (NWiLs)


Good to be "seen".

Posted by: Captain Whitebread at October 17, 2017 10:58 PM (rJUlF)

266 Is this the thread for anal warts?

Posted by: otho at October 17, 2017 10:55 PM (qGuLD)


We didn't even get to boobs and guns first.
But, eventually, aren't all of them?

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) at October 17, 2017 10:58 PM (h9QN9)

267 Donna, I'm sure he did, but not really in "public" too much or whatever. He's his own guy of course, and we were always busy, he was a captain then, I didn't hang out with them ossifers too much.

Posted by: Common Tater at October 17, 2017 10:58 PM (ke5UQ)

268 Alright... I, unfortunately, have Things To Do.

I'll try to catch y'all tomorrow.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) at October 17, 2017 10:58 PM (h9QN9)

269 John Mccain is no better than Jane Fonda. At least the commie bitch never ran for office.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 10:58 PM (KP5rU)

270 tonight, I brought in my big porch plant. it's friggin' yuuuge in my little house. I could use it as an early Christmas tree.
Posted by: booknlass at October 17, 2017 10:46 PM (gie9o)


I have to decide whether to get a tree. There's not a lot of room in the apartment.

Posted by: Captain Whitebread at October 17, 2017 10:59 PM (rJUlF)

271 115 - Remini was on Howard Stern once ages ago and said she regarded giving oral sex as a disgusting imposition.

She seems to have sex issues in general.

Posted by: Bear with Assymetrical Balls at October 17, 2017 10:59 PM (H5knJ)

272 Hey that Cheap Sleep Motel is in Whitefish Montana and is actually a pretty good place!
Don

Posted by: Don at October 17, 2017 10:59 PM (yil7J)

273 192 Baby killer Patrick Tomlinson made a big Twatter splash today with his thought experiment about a fire in an artificial insemination clinic. You can either save 1000 fertilized embryos or a five year old boy. If you pick the boy, it means you know the embryos aren't alive or aren't human or something. If you could either save a five year o!d or a ninety-five year old and you choose the five year old it means great grandpa wasn't alive or wasn't human or something.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I'm Dreaming of a White Privilege at October 17, 2017 10:39 PM (Nwg0u)


If the 5 year old was Tomlinson, I'd save the embryos.

Posted by: Tami at October 17, 2017 10:59 PM (Enq6K)

274
Should NOT have used Kerry as an example. I try to go without thinking of him as much as possible. Now he's like an earworm.

Posted by: irongrampa at October 17, 2017 10:59 PM (S/hVx)

275
The scientific/medical literature does point out the high risk of anal sex. The media just doesn't want to talk about.

IIRC, the probability of HIV transmission is 18x for "catching" in the butt than catching in the vagina.

Now, going the other way, the "pitcher's" chances are much lower than either, but nonetheless sticking up the Solo is still more risky than Ms. Happy.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 10:59 PM (8O3HH)

276 "The Pacific walrus, Florida Keys mole skink, eastern boreal toad and 22 other species are now one step closer to extinction. We're going to challenge as many of these bogus findings as we can."

Well, since I have never before heard of the Florida Keys mole skink, or the Eastern Boreal Toad, they may as well go extinct. Clearly, they are obscure species of little value to the ecosystem.

And what's the use of having walruses, if you cannot hunt them for their ivory?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 10:59 PM (O848g)

277 Loaded page. Last comment was CaliGirl #40 10:13 PM

Perused content. Reloaded. Last comment is Zettai Ryoiki #77 10:19 PM

But what a rich sixteen minutes it was. (Did not play videos yet.)

Good day good night good gumdrops


Posted by: mindful webworker's babbling again at October 17, 2017 10:21 PM (d/5DH)

I only see 6 minutes, or is there a joke in there somewhere?

Posted by: Country Boy at October 17, 2017 11:00 PM (D2vc1)

278 262: Thanks for clearing up that mystery.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:00 PM (KP5rU)

279 233,
"And most heterosexuals who contracted AIDs were either junkies or can be
traced back to anal sex, women with bisexual guys and then other guys
having anal sex with her."



It's different in Africa. There is a thing there about having "dry sex" and that activity causes small cuts which give the HIV virus a path to the blood stream just like anal sex does and of course shared needles for IV drugs which go right there directly.

Posted by: geoffb at October 17, 2017 11:01 PM (zOpu5)

280 257

Is this the thread for anal warts?

Posted by: otho at October 17, 2017 10:55 PM (qGuLD)

++++

That might work better in the GAINZZZ thread.

Tell Ace I sent you.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 11:01 PM (pvjTE)

281 I usually have to get to know a woman a little better before wanking right in front of her. Strangers get all pissy that way, ya know?

Posted by: Common Tater at October 17, 2017 11:01 PM (ke5UQ)

282 tonight, I brought in my big porch plant. it's friggin' yuuuge in my little house. I could use it as an early Christmas tree.
Posted by: booknlass
----------

*!*

Thank you. I'd better bring in the Christmas cactus from the porch. May be a bit cold for it tonight.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at October 17, 2017 11:01 PM (7Cr6v)

283 Navy / Marine jokes are consistently hilarious. Although I am very glad that I get to laugh at those jokes from the safety of this monitor.

Seriously, thanks for your service.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 17, 2017 11:02 PM (6FqZa)

284 One thing led to another, and the sex toy in question seemingly disappeared. Emma thought that surely he was playing a trick on her.

Soon, however, she realized that he was not joking, and the sex toy had actually become stuck inside her backside.


Wow. I don't know, I'm usually aware when something is stuck in me.

Posted by: Cranky Professor Chaos aka gumdrop gorilla at October 17, 2017 11:02 PM (PKZTQ)

285 Baby killer Patrick Tomlinson made a big Twatter splash today with his thought experiment about a fire in an artificial insemination clinic.

Then I counter with "yes, but all the embryos were black lesbians. It's genetic, you know"

Now what's he going to say?

Posted by: t-bird at October 17, 2017 11:03 PM (pszv/)

286 Honesty. As loathsome as John Kerry is, he is, relatively speaking, more honest than John McCain about who he is and what he stands for.
Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 10:54 PM (pvjTE)

---

& I Never surrendered

Posted by: John Kerry at October 17, 2017 11:03 PM (vChNs)

287 284 One thing led to another, and the sex toy in question seemingly disappeared. Emma thought that surely he was playing a trick on her.

Soon, however, she realized that he was not joking, and the sex toy had actually become stuck inside her backside.


Wow. I don't know, I'm usually aware when something is stuck in me.
Posted by: Cranky Professor Chaos aka gumdrop gorilla at October 17, 2017 11:02 PM (PKZTQ)


Wonder what he does with his spare change with her nearby?

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:04 PM (4bU2r)

288 It's different in Africa. There is a thing there about having "dry sex" and that activity causes small cuts which give the HIV virus a path to the blood stream just like anal sex does and of course shared needles for IV drugs which go right there directly.

Posted by: geoffb at October 17, 2017 11:01 PM (zOpu5)


It also turns out that anal sex is much more prevalent in Africa than pretty much anywhere else.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 11:04 PM (8gDQu)

289
Wow. I don't know, I'm usually aware when something is stuck in me.

Posted by: Cranky Professor Chaos aka gumdrop gorilla at October 17, 2017 11:02 PM (PKZTQ)

++++

She said it was still vibrating. I would call that a clue.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 11:04 PM (pvjTE)

290 When did complimenting a woman become rape?

I'm a little pissed about this, because, dammit, I miss the occassional compliment, but I know men can't do that anymore because....OF UGLY HARPIES who call themselves "feminists" while being the farthest from feminine they possibly can be.

IN the early 80's, it became a thing for lesbians to become beastly obese so that they would be too ugly for men to come on to. Turns out, they were ugly on the inside first.

Roman Polanski, Weinstein, Woody Allen, Clinton--these are rapists.

The guy in the motor pool who notices my new haircut is NOT a rapist.

Pretty simple,, really.

But we've lost our goddam minds.

Posted by: tcn in AK at October 17, 2017 11:04 PM (NXsWM)

291 Emma and her boyfriend both look like chavs, which is the Brit counterpart to Florida Man (and Woman).

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:04 PM (O848g)

292 286; Ever get that "huntin license?"

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:05 PM (KP5rU)

293 Tuesday Night ONT Compliance Pics

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/920320489175900165

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/920320570260180992

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/920320659930173442

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/920320750082580480

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/920320833201016837

Posted by: kbdabear at October 17, 2017 11:05 PM (eh0Va)

294 Oral sex. Is that when you talk about it?
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian


That reminds me of the old joke about the three stages of marriage.
Stage one is house sex. They young newlyweds have sex in every room of the house.
Stage two is bedroom sex. The couple have sex once a week in the bedroom.
Stage three is hallway sex. The couple says f**k you as they pass each other in the hallway.

Posted by: nerdygirl at October 17, 2017 11:06 PM (+lVUW)

295 you're welcome, Mike Hammer. I meant to bring in my plant last night, but didn't. It's getting coldwe here at night. only 55, but I don't want to shock my lovely combination planting.

plus, it keeps me company

Posted by: booknlass at October 17, 2017 11:07 PM (gie9o)

296 >> Wonder what he does with his spare change with >> her nearby?

You laugh, but in those "tales of the ER" things, there was some woman who got something odd stuck up her hooh-hah. She confessed to using it as a pocket for safekeeping important stuff. Not making that up.

And, about know knowing something is stuck inside of you, one woman (and this too was in the UK, IIRC) had a 5" dildo stuck up inside her for *years*. Again, not making that up.

It was causing some urinary track problem, IIRC and they discovered it upon examination.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 11:08 PM (8O3HH)

297 More Tuesday Night ONT Compliance Pics

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/920320922707550210

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/920321000306331648

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/920321089674338312

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/920321191117811712

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/920321292750000129

Posted by: kbdabear at October 17, 2017 11:08 PM (eh0Va)

298 Juan McStain is a reverse ace in the skies, and the Senate.

He splashes more things for his own side*, than do the enemies.






*alright, nominally his own side politically.

Posted by: an indifferent penguin at October 17, 2017 11:08 PM (E3EdC)

299 Quit it with all the plant talk! God, I'm so horny right now....

Posted by: Harvey Weinstein at October 17, 2017 11:08 PM (tIhIY)

300 Posted by: nerdygirl at October 17, 2017 11:06 PM (+lVUW)

---

that's not funny, mostly because it is SO true.

Posted by: redc1c4 at October 17, 2017 11:08 PM (l5E9o)

301 It also turns out that anal sex is much more prevalent in Africa than pretty much anywhere else.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair

you been around any mohamedians lately?

Posted by: The Goat and The Chicken at October 17, 2017 11:09 PM (a7+wS)

302 you're welcome, Mike Hammer. I meant to bring in my plant last night, but didn't. It's getting coldwe here at night. only 55, but I don't want to shock my lovely combination planting.

plus, it keeps me company
Posted by: booknlass
-------------

May go down to freezing here. Should have brought it in last night.

They are good listeners.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at October 17, 2017 11:09 PM (7Cr6v)

303 you been around any mohamedians lately?

Posted by: The Goat and The Chicken at October 17, 2017 11:09 PM (a7+wS)


Good point.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 11:09 PM (8gDQu)

304 Juan McStain is a reverse ace in the skies, and the Senate.

That took me a while to parse, given Ace's recent shart thread.

Posted by: t-bird at October 17, 2017 11:09 PM (tIhIY)

305 Hey everybody.

"Cheap Sleep Motel"

Only the Yukon Micropolitan Area's finest moderately-priced call girls are what'ch'll find stuffed dead in those mattresses...

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 17, 2017 11:10 PM (eMKNe)

306 >>>The Gin and Tonic is not a froo froo Spanish cocktail It is a man's drink. Manly men!

I was intrigued by the addition of rosemary in the article. Seriously.

Posted by: Max Power at October 17, 2017 11:10 PM (q177U)

307 266 Is this the thread for anal warts?

---

First, you must clean the area, making sure it is dry. I prefer Bounty A-size paper towels followed by a cotton swab. NOT a cotton ball, perish the thought.

Next open the compound W. The one step variety OF COURSE. Make sure to put the cap down inverted to avoid getting any of the compound on the table...

Posted by: Anal retentive warts at October 17, 2017 11:10 PM (vChNs)

308 Fsck yeah, gin and tonic. I'm actually drinking my second now. Best G&T I ever had was this past summer at a bar in Rome called the Gin Corner. The barman spoke pretty good English, and he educated me about Italian gin while I educated him about American (I was on the tasting panel that created Bluecoat).

He had a lot of the same fundamentals CBD mentioned: a pretty stiff drink, large ice cubes, and high quality tonic (I often cheat with diet tonic at home though). His kicker was to take four or five juniper berries, crush them slightly with the flat of a knife, and add them before the tonic. Damn good drink.

Posted by: Otto Zilch at October 17, 2017 11:10 PM (9NZ4M)

309 What's a five year old kid doing at a fertility clinic in the first place?

Posted by: Muldoon at October 17, 2017 11:11 PM (wPiJc)

310 Hemorrhoids are vascular. Butt warts are viral.

---

Is that why everyone has seen Butt warts?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at October 17, 2017 11:12 PM (vChNs)

311 They hit those fuckers with birds to test them, and they don't break.

The last thing in the world I am worried about when I fly is some retard's drone he is using to see the MILF next door.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 17, 2017 10:36 PM (wYseH)
-------------------------------------

Bird strikes have led to a number or aircraft incidents and crashes. But sure, let's pretend away the threat from drones based upon bird disinformation.

Posted by: RioBravo at October 17, 2017 11:12 PM (giT7q)

312 IN the early 80's, it became a thing for lesbians to become beastly obese so that they would be too ugly for men to come on to. Turns out, they were ugly on the inside first.


....

Could we get some science on this?


the only skinny lesbos are in porn


I was at Fred Myer today and 2 chicks were holding hands, one was at least 240 while tho other was a skinny 150

Posted by: original jake at October 17, 2017 11:12 PM (a7+wS)

313 That took me a while to parse, given Ace's recent shart thread.

Posted by: t-bird at October 17, 2017 11:09 PM (tIhIY)


Heh. Then I mentioned splashing things, too.

Posted by: an indifferent penguin at October 17, 2017 11:12 PM (E3EdC)

314 What's a five year old kid doing at a fertility clinic in the first place?

Posted by: Muldoon at October 17, 2017 11:11 PM (wPiJc)

They didn't clean out one of the drawers well enough, and like Topsy, he jes' growed?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:12 PM (O848g)

315 I have to decide whether to get a tree. There's not a lot of room in the apartment.
Posted by: Captain Whitebread

I have a Charlie Brown tree for my 50s dinette table (you remember the ones, chrome with red top?).

but a tree just for you would be a great gift to yourself

Posted by: booknlass at October 17, 2017 11:13 PM (gie9o)

316 307; Do you have to take Hillarys' nipple clamps off before you proceed? Or, just, damn the torpedoes?

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:13 PM (KP5rU)

317 woo hoo another mishum ont!

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:14 PM (vuY5x)

318
And, I just discovered this. At least one person (a dude) has died from getting something stuck up his ass and being too embarrassed to seek help.

It perforated his rectum/colon and he died of resulting septic shock.

According to the ER docs, it's the damn dudes who mostly accidentally sit on things, not the women.

Now, women, do get things stuck up their vaginas a good bit, but still not as much as men get stuff up their butts.

So go figure.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 11:14 PM (8O3HH)

319 wow, those woo hoos take a lot out of you don't they.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:14 PM (vuY5x)

320
Bird strikes have led to a number or aircraft incidents and crashes. But sure, let's pretend away the threat from drones based upon bird disinformation.

Posted by: RioBravo at October 17, 2017 11:12 PM (giT7q)

++++

That's usually when there is a whole flock of them and they get sucked into the engine, isn't it?

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 11:14 PM (FUu/Z)

321 Could we get some science on this?
--------------

We're on it, $3.5 Million study by HHS:
http://tinyurl.com/pd7tpak

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at October 17, 2017 11:15 PM (7Cr6v)

322 >>I was intrigued by the addition of rosemary in the article. Seriously.

There's a cocktail called a Plantation I make sometimes. Muddle a couple of fresh basil leaves with sugar or syrup in a shaker, add cracked ice, a hooker of gin, the juice of a quarter lime, and about four ounces of grapefruit juice. Shake and serve on the rocks. The basil really stands out in this.

Posted by: Otto Zilch at October 17, 2017 11:15 PM (9NZ4M)

323 Is that why everyone has seen Butt warts?

From his days playing Robin opposite Adam West's Batman.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at October 17, 2017 11:15 PM (IcT7t)

324 Plenty of girls went to go visit their aunt for a few months before they became a umm....sister back in the day. But my understanding is that in the 50s there was a whole lot of "heavy petting" which I believe Bill Clinton taught us is NOT sex.
Posted by: 18-1

There were also people who "had to get married", and there were quite a few premature babies.

Posted by: nerdygirl at October 17, 2017 11:15 PM (+lVUW)

325 That might work better in the GAINZZZ thread.

Tell Ace I sent you.



Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 11:01 PM


I just want to state my support for Ace and say that despite the many, many rumours, Ace probably doesn't have anal warts.

Posted by: otho at October 17, 2017 11:15 PM (qGuLD)

326
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 11:14 PM (8O3HH)

Boys will be boys.
Here, hold my beer

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:15 PM (4bU2r)

327 Posted by: LASue at October 17, 2017 10:51 PM (hZ+us)

So what game are you blowing us off for to go see? Hmmm??

Posted by: Country Boy at October 17, 2017 11:15 PM (D2vc1)

328 It also turns out that anal sex is much more prevalent in Africa than pretty much anywhere else.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 11:04 PM (8gDQu)

---

they have all those bonobos that they can watch for inspiration

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at October 17, 2017 11:15 PM (vChNs)

329 Everyone at work was taking their blood pressure today. Decided to take mine. Big mistake. 188/118. That wasn't good. Called my doctor, he said get over to ther office now. Started me on losartan while sitting in his office. Hopefully my pressure will settle down.

Difficult while taking care of mom, my uncle, working in a high pressure job, exhausted. Any ideas to help morons?

Posted by: Release the flying Sonobis! at October 17, 2017 11:16 PM (79p/O)

330 320; Who in the fuck wants to test that theory on a flght?

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:16 PM (KP5rU)

331 And yeah, I know Spanish gin (I've got two bottles in the liquor cabinet: Indigo and Larios). It ain't the International House of Martinis for no good reason.

Posted by: Otto Zilch at October 17, 2017 11:16 PM (9NZ4M)

332 328 It also turns out that anal sex is much more prevalent in Africa than pretty much anywhere else.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 11:04 PM (8gDQu)

well duh, it's all that badonk-a-DONK.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 17, 2017 11:17 PM (V2Yro)

333 >>>I have a Charlie Brown tree for my 50s dinette table (you remember the ones, chrome with red top?).
Posted by: booknlass at October 17, 2017 11:13 PM (gie9o)<<<

You have a dildo tree that you put on a dinette table?

(wonders if there's also a Festivus pole)

Posted by: an indifferent penguin at October 17, 2017 11:17 PM (E3EdC)

334 >> t also turns out that anal sex is much more
>> prevalent in Africa than pretty much anywhere else.

I remember reading something about that. The previous data that they were using for "heterosexual transmission" was likely flawed. They weren't being too honest, or weren't even asking, and a lot of lying was going on.

Like Dr. House would warn them, the were lyin' about what they'd been doin'.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 11:18 PM (8O3HH)

335 329 Difficult while taking care of mom, my uncle, working in a high pressure job, exhausted. Any ideas to help morons?
Posted by: Release the flying Sonobis! at October 17, 2017 11:16 PM (79p/O)

Meditation & EFT are helping drop mine. https://www.thetappingsolution.com/

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 17, 2017 11:19 PM (hscyr)

336 no you Moron, indifferent penguin. it's the kind Linus wrapped his blanket around, you know.

you're just being obtuse.

Posted by: booknlass at October 17, 2017 11:19 PM (gie9o)

337 so how far are we from the point where nuking the brits out of mercy is a coin flip? Bill wouldn't even leave hillary in such a state, insured or not.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:19 PM (vuY5x)

338 >> Boys will be boys.
>>Here, hold my beer

Pro tip: when inserting bottles into orifices, don't use the open end. A suction can develop and get it stuck, not to mention do some damage.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 11:19 PM (8O3HH)

339 Any ideas to help morons?
Posted by: Release the flying Sonobis!

I got my BP down to normal just by lifting weights at age 47,no medicine or life style change


Starting Strength by Mark Rippetoe

Posted by: original jake at October 17, 2017 11:19 PM (a7+wS)

340 Thanks bebe!

Posted by: Release the flying Sonobis! at October 17, 2017 11:20 PM (79p/O)

341 That last sentiment/photo is the foundational basis for Civilization. Having a drink after a bad day is so much more couth than massacring all living creatures on your neighbor's farm.

Posted by: RickZ at October 17, 2017 11:20 PM (kj5Wx)

342 Pole dancing is in line to become an Olympic sport within a decade

http://preview.tinyurl.com/y7yfr5k4

Posted by: The Olympic Hat at October 17, 2017 11:20 PM (itfg0)

343 I loved those chrome and red dinette sets! Ate all my meals at one every day until 4th grade, when we moved into the new house and mom and dad upgraded to Everything is Avocado Green and Harvest Gold.

they couldn't help it, they loved being trendy.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 17, 2017 11:21 PM (V2Yro)

344 Well this promises to be a hard hitting news show.

http://tinyurl.com/y6we6yaa

The two Mandalay Bay employees who were shot at in the hallway, Jesus Campos and Stephen Schuck are going to appear on "The Ellen Show!" Feelings, tears, and hugs are sure to be had all around. Maybe there will be a #MeToo to share too.

Posted by: geoffb at October 17, 2017 11:22 PM (zOpu5)

345 It stunned me today how high my blood pressure was reading.

Posted by: mpfs Release the flying Sonobis! at October 17, 2017 11:22 PM (79p/O)

346 And, I just discovered this. At least one person (a dude) has died from getting something stuck up his ass and being too embarrassed to seek help.

It perforated his rectum/colon and he died of resulting septic shock.

According to the ER docs, it's the damn dudes who mostly accidentally sit on things, not the women.

Now, women, do get things stuck up their vaginas a good bit, but still not as much as men get stuff up their butts.

So go figure.
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October




Which is funy if you think about it because one is designed for expelling everything and one is designed for retaining everything lighter than 9 pounds.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:22 PM (vuY5x)

347 307; Do you have to take Hillarys' nipple clamps off before you proceed? Or, just, damn the torpedoes?
Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:13 PM (KP5rU)

---

We're on step 1.2.B

Now don't you go skipping ahead to step 3.14.F

now where was I? ah...

Best to get a paper plate to put the cap on, just to be safe. Not a 9 inch plate, that would be wasteful. I 6 inch will do fine and 8 inch will suffice in a pinch. Now don't forget to reseal the packaging for the plates. We don't need to take any chances on them spilling all over the floor. Two twisty ties are sufficient, color coordinated of course. Or one twisty and 2 rubber bands...

Posted by: Anal retentive warts at October 17, 2017 11:22 PM (vChNs)

348 A joke...

A young virgin falls in love with a gentleman of a certain ethnicity which was rumoured to have strong predilection for buggery, and though her family and friends attempted to dissuade her, she married him anyway...

After a month or so into the marriage, some inquired of her as to if he'd yet attempted to claim the "other hole"... She'd replied, "Oh, not all! He says that if we did that, I might get pregnant and we just simply cannot afford to start a family yet."

Posted by: Zettai Ryoiki at October 17, 2017 11:23 PM (e9G8E)

349 Speaking of shoving things into orifices...

"Why would anyone cleanse their vagina with a cucumber?"

From the BBC: http://preview.tinyurl.com/yddkgj4q

Posted by: The Unpickled Hat at October 17, 2017 11:23 PM (itfg0)

350 328 It also turns out that anal sex is much more prevalent in Africa than pretty much anywhere else.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October




Well duh. Everyone is starving so it is not so messy.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:23 PM (vuY5x)

351 Tom Servo, I'm thinking I need to find a 'leaf' for mine, so it'll seat more people...

i typed it into google images, and there seems to be almost a subculture of red formica table lovers.

Posted by: booknlass at October 17, 2017 11:24 PM (gie9o)

352 Difficult while taking care of mom, my uncle, working in a high pressure job, exhausted. Any ideas to help morons?

Posted by: Release the flying Sonobis! at October 17, 2017 11:16 PM (79p/O)

My advice (grabs 6 pack) is to drink heavily.

Posted by: Senator Blutarsky at October 17, 2017 11:24 PM (D2vc1)

353 338 - You can use whatever end you want if you're not concerned about whether the recipient lives or dies.

Bon courage!

Posted by: Fatty Arbuckle at October 17, 2017 11:24 PM (H5knJ)

354 The Pacific walrus, Florida Keys mole skink, eastern boreal toad and 22 other species are now one step closer to extinction.

It's about time.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:57 PM (8gDQu)

========

I guess the best approach is just utter contempt. You can't even talk to liberals anymore. Stupid pieces of garbage.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at October 17, 2017 11:25 PM (/qEW2)

355 booknlass,

I haven't had a tree in years.

There hasn't been a lot of money to spend on Christmas decorations, no one ever visits, and I usually end up spending the holiday at my mom's or seeing the grandkids.

I want to change that this year.

Posted by: Captain Whitebread at October 17, 2017 11:25 PM (rJUlF)

356 OK, guys, have any of you noticed the short haired ginger chick on the iPhone 8 commercial? To me she looks androgynous and weird and the commercial bothers me because I suspect they're trying to pass off a rather asexual look as an ideal.



I agree. I finally realized she had boobs...not where my eyes usually go. Of course, it doesn't mean anything, considering people mix & match the bottom & top halves of their bodies in this brave new world. So who knows. Even my transgender pet dragon was confused.

Posted by: Cranky Professor Chaos aka gumdrop gorilla at October 17, 2017 11:25 PM (PKZTQ)

357 http://preview.tinyurl.com/y7yfr5k4

Posted by: The Olympic Hat at October 17, 2017 11:20 PM (itfg0)

Gives a whole new meaning to the term "rhythmic gymastics", doesn't it?

A new non-sport to add to the plethora of non-sports already polluting the Olympics.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:25 PM (O848g)

358 AllenG (DedicatedTenther),
Spot on. Feminists and lefties who have tried to make everything rapey created this problem.
I enjoy watching the lefties in Hollywood, who have been shoving identity politics down our throats, hoist on their own petard. I just hope that more than Harv the Perv get taken down.

Posted by: nerdygirl at October 17, 2017 11:25 PM (+lVUW)

359 So, who is within reach of their GNAMM challenge chip?

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:25 PM (vuY5x)

360 "Work harder that you do."

Well, I got a C in English and even I worked harder at that than you did. Nanner nanner.

Posted by: bour3 at October 17, 2017 11:26 PM (KXQr+)

361 359 So, who is within reach of their GNAMM challenge chip?
Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:25 PM (vuY5x)

raises boobs

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 17, 2017 11:26 PM (hscyr)

362 That "Sound of Silence" is very well done.

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at October 17, 2017 11:27 PM (398bZ)

363 Bebes!




Have had one on me since whatshername danced on the table at Saturday night's dinner.


that was really funny until that granny started swinging on us with her hurrycane. Who knocked he down with the ashtray?

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:29 PM (vuY5x)

364 Captain, you could get one of those cool aluminum trees with the light that revolves and changes its color, from red, to blue, to green.

or if you got a little live one, you could decorate it with ornaments from thrift stores

i'll send you one, if you get a tree

Posted by: booknlass at October 17, 2017 11:29 PM (gie9o)

365 The two Mandalay Bay employees who were shot at in the hallway, Jesus Campos and Stephen Schuck are going to appear on "The Ellen Show!" Feelings, tears, and hugs are sure to be had all around. Maybe there will be a #MeToo to share too.

Posted by: geoffb at October 17, 2017 11:22 PM (zOpu5)

So somebody found Jesus, then?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:29 PM (O848g)

366 If you leave a door unlocked, i'll leave you a present under your tree...

You're gonna find out who's been naughty

Posted by: Harvey Weinstein at October 17, 2017 11:29 PM (vChNs)

367
Regarding the "#MeToo" movement...
***
Yeah there is a fundamental problem here. Free society normal works by defining somethings as ok, and other as not (whether formally illegal or just frowned upon).

But there are a non-trivial number of women that want to set the rules around "romance" not about these things are allowed and these things are not, but instead for a man I find desirable these things are ok, and below this level they are not.

SNL, all of places had a great skit on this;

http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/sexual-harassment/2751966?snl=1

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 11:30 PM (Z8FFX)

368 349 Speaking of shoving things into orifices...

"Why would anyone cleanse their vagina with a cucumber?"

From the BBC: http://preview.tinyurl.com/yddkgj4q
Posted by: The Unpickled Hat at October 17, 2017 11:23 PM (itfg0)

What is "Because" for $100?

Pickles always smell better than bad tuna.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:30 PM (4bU2r)

369 344; Anal warts, stuff stuck in the butt, sharts, now, Ellen. What's next, penile implants? Holy shit, and you think I'm demented.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:30 PM (KP5rU)

370 That's usually when there is a whole flock of them and they get sucked into the engine, isn't it?

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 11:14 PM (FUu/Z)


Not really. There have certainly been accidents where flocks of small birds got "ingested" by an engine and caused a crash, but there have also been plenty of incidents where a single larger bird has been the culprit. And a drone is on the larger side, at least compared to small birds (plus it is made of harder materials more likely to damage moving engine parts, wiring, control cables or control surfaces).

Posted by: HTL at October 17, 2017 11:30 PM (0l8E+)

371 From this morning's Morning Rant:

"His shoulder requires surgical repair, which is hopefully happening as you read this. One-handed typing while stoned on painkillers is reserved for ONT writers and commenters, so it may be awhile before OregonMuse returns to the blog. But please keep him in your thoughts and prayers, or at the very least a toast of something good (maybe the Valu-Rite Gold Label) in his honor."

I hope and pray for OM's speedy recovery, as so many of you have done for me.

(as they say, "Done there. Been that.")

Posted by: Colossus, the Forbin Project (1970) at October 17, 2017 11:31 PM (lIZQs)

372 Night all.

Here is "Shallow Water" by Electric Citizen:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2bWjN39ZXTA

Posted by: The Political Hat at October 17, 2017 11:32 PM (itfg0)

373 Well, there was a guy that snuck into some farm in Washington or Oregon that kept livestock so people could have sex with them and stole the services of some horse. Unfortunaely for him the force laid that pipe so deep and hard it tore him up and that was all she wrote. pervert and thief.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:32 PM (vuY5x)

374
>>>http://preview.tinyurl.com/y7yfr5k4



Posted by: The Olympic Hat at October 17, 2017 11:20 PM (itfg0)



Gives a whole new meaning to the term "rhythmic gymastics", doesn't it?



A new non-sport to add to the plethora of non-sports already polluting the Olympics.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:25 PM (O848g)<<<

Maybe if the poles they were dancing around were javelins, being hurled at them by the track and field folks? And they had to run between five javelins/poles, do their little dance, and were timed to see who completes a routine first?

Posted by: an indifferent penguin at October 17, 2017 11:32 PM (E3EdC)

375 Thanks, Mr. Misanthrope. especially for the Sting song. it transcends, creates an atmosphere. an optimistic one.

Posted by: booknlass at October 17, 2017 11:32 PM (gie9o)

376 I can't help myself, I like Puddles.

Posted by: Leonard Pinth-Garnell at October 17, 2017 11:32 PM (PtuJp)

377 Posted by: Release the flying Sonobis! at October 17, 2017 11:16 PM (79p/O)

Hey sweetpea, also be aware that certain over the counter meds like ibuprofen ( Advil) and Aleve (Naproxen) as well as decongestants and antihistamines can spike your blood pressure. (And will also counteract some bp meds, so you need to double check yours f you take anything of that nature)

So does black licorice and its derivatives, like that sweetener whose name eludes me now.

Any kind of exercise over the long haul will help reduce your bp, too. Walking is great. Deep breathing is really good. ( Do it for 20 minutes at a time)

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 17, 2017 11:33 PM (kuFbc)

378 We hate Trump and call on Hilllary and Presdent Obama to do something to stop this idiot Trump NOW !!!!

Posted by: Mary Clogginstien from Brattleboro at October 17, 2017 11:33 PM (WmgTn)

379 Jeezus Fvck do whatever the Doctor tells you to do IMMEDIATELY
None of these helpful morons are gonna feed you and wipe your ass for the rest of your life after you have a stroke
Much less feed your kids

Posted by: MAxIE at October 17, 2017 11:33 PM (9TR2V)

380 not the force, the horse. unless it was luke skywalker's horse. did he have a horse?

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:33 PM (vuY5x)

381 373: Well, that tops it all. Equine sodomy for the win!

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:34 PM (KP5rU)

382 "362 That "Sound of Silence" is very well done."

It would be great if that was Ace in the clown suit.

but then again that guy's voice is actually very good.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 17, 2017 11:34 PM (V2Yro)

383 that was really funny until that granny started swinging on us with her hurrycane. Who knocked he down with the ashtray?
Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:29 PM (vuY5x)

? i thought curmudgeon took her out with his cane? i was really disappointed he dropped her so fast. i was hoping it would be like that bugs bunny cartoon " pasty, thrust..."

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 17, 2017 11:34 PM (hscyr)

384 Really great songs. Nice revisiting the Sting songs from my Junior High days.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:35 PM (vuY5x)

385 Shake and serve on the rocks. The basil really stands out in this.
Posted by: Otto Zilch at October 17, 2017 11:15 PM (9NZ4M)

Basil, lime and grapefruit. Sounds right up my alley.

Posted by: Max Power at October 17, 2017 11:35 PM (q177U)

386 373 He was only looking for a stable relationship

Posted by: MAxIE at October 17, 2017 11:35 PM (9TR2V)

387 Women like recipes. Women like religion. Women like porn. A woman of ISIS likes all three.

=========

I'm a bit sad over the destruction of ISIS. This woman (originally from Morocco) joined ISIS from Belgium. ISIS was a magnet drawing the most malignant scum from Europe back into the Middle East. I'd think that was a good thing.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at October 17, 2017 11:35 PM (/qEW2)

388 That's usually when there is a whole flock of them and they get sucked into the engine, isn't it?
Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 17, 2017 11:14 PM (FUu/Z)

-----------------------------------------

I don't know the statistics off hand but sometimes it is a flock of birds such as the "miracle landing on the Hudson River incident" which resulted in a double bird strike. Other cases are cracked canopy glass during low level flights due to a single bird strike. They are obviously not common but bird strikes do down aircraft or require emergency landings.

One can do an internet search on "emergency landing due to bird strike" and find many examples. Many drones are heavier than birds.

Right now most drones idiots will be flying are toys with cameras. But flight and use rules should be worked up before it becomes more of a problem. Standard idiocy doesn't disappear because someone learns to fly a drone.

Posted by: RioBravo at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (giT7q)

389 When did complimenting a woman become rape?
***
There was an article in one of the big papers by some feminist complaining men don't ogle her on the street anymore as she's gotten older.

Of course she had previously written articles about how terrible the male gaze is...

I had to laugh.

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (Z8FFX)

390

Attention everybody... does this online dating exchange means she is interested?

You sent Susan a smile!
7/23/2017

Susan sent you a smile!
10/10/2017

Me: Hi Susan! Are you looking forward to autumn weather moving in?
10/12/2017

Susan: Hi Brendan! Yes, I am looking forward to the fall. You? Have a great weekend, Susan.
10/14/2017

Me: Yes, very much so. I sleep better and have more energy in cooler weather.
10/14/2017

Susan: Sounds you really love the fall. Hope your week is off to a good start!
10/16/2017



Posted by: Serious Cat at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (HaZvX)

391 ? i thought curmudgeon took her out with his cane? i was really disappointed he dropped her so fast. i was hoping it would be like that bugs bunny cartoon " pasty, thrust..."
Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October




Yeah he took her out in one swing, like he caught her in bed with his wife, without him,again.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (vuY5x)

392 That "Sound of Silence" is very well done."

It would be great if that was Ace in the clown suit.

but then again that guy's voice is actually very good.
Posted by: Tom Servo at October 17, 2017 11:34 PM (V2Yro)


Have y'all heard the actual Disturbed version? It is stunning.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (kuFbc)

393 What's a five year old kid doing at a fertility clinic in the first place?

Posted by: Muldoon

To hell with that. I want to know what that 95-year-old guy is doing there!

Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (H5rtT)

394 "And a drone is on the larger side, at least compared to small birds (plus it is made of harder materials more likely to damage moving engine parts, wiring, control cables or control surfaces)."

I'll bet a drone with some C4 in it would be a helluva thing.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (V2Yro)

395 I'm a bit sad over the destruction of ISIS. This woman (originally from Morocco) joined ISIS from Belgium. ISIS was a magnet drawing the most malignant scum from Europe back into the Middle East. I'd think that was a good thing.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at October 17, 2017 11:35 PM (/qEW2)

Kind of like a Roach Motel for muzzies.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (O848g)

396 A new non-sport to add to the plethora of non-sports already polluting the Olympics.

Ever notice that everyone trying to "broaden their appeal" is abandoning their success and destroying their product?

Posted by: GOPe at October 17, 2017 11:37 PM (pszv/)

397 Ooh Otto Zilch. I love G and T and the idea of adding crushed juniper berries is now on my list next time I make one. An excellent tonic is as important as the gin honestly.

Posted by: keena at October 17, 2017 11:37 PM (RiTnx)

398 Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:25 PM


While I agree that it shouldn't be in the Olympics, I will admit that at this level it's not much different from some of the other gymnastics-type or synchronized swimming events.



https://youtu.be/waIuhfoTMv8


Marginally SFW, depending on where you work.

Posted by: Country Singer at October 17, 2017 11:37 PM (yzxic)

399 Attention everybody... does this online dating exchange means she is interested?

You sent Susan a smile!
7/23/2017

Susan sent you a smile!
10/10/2017

Me: Hi Susan! Are you looking forward to autumn weather moving in?
10/12/2017

Susan: Hi Brendan! Yes, I am looking forward to the fall. You? Have a great weekend, Susan.
10/14/2017

Me: Yes, very much so. I sleep better and have more energy in cooler weather.
10/14/2017

Susan: Sounds you really love the fall. Hope your week is off to a good start!
10/16/2017



Posted by: Serious Cat at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM


She wants your manmeat bad. Trust me. They don't call me Captain Lovelog for nothing.

Posted by: otho at October 17, 2017 11:38 PM (qGuLD)

400 327 Posted by: LASue at October 17, 2017 10:51 PM (hZ+us)

So what game are you blowing us off for to go see? Hmmm??
Posted by: Country Boy at October 17, 2017 11:15 PM (D2vc1)

UT. V OSU. It's an early game but friends are coming from out of town and staying over with us. Where's the party(general area)?

Posted by: LASue at October 17, 2017 11:38 PM (hZ+us)

401 BTW that Vegas security guard is giving his first interview tomorrow on Ellen. Wonder what scared him off Hannity?

Posted by: keena at October 17, 2017 11:38 PM (RiTnx)

402

Well, I'll be. I've seen it all. Jes' grease my butt and get a ficus stuck up it:

Jimmy Fallon is making fun of Hillary for the Russian uranium bribe crap. Had a Hillary impersonator on the phone, acting drunk about the Chardonnay.

I can't believe it.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 11:38 PM (8O3HH)

403 Attention everybody... does this online dating exchange means she is interested?

You mean the Boy Named Sue? She's not repulsed.

Posted by: t-bird at October 17, 2017 11:39 PM (pszv/)

404 ........
Susan: Sounds you really love the fall. Hope your week is off to a good start!
10/16/2017



Posted by: Serious Cat at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (HaZvX)

Your response: "Wanna fuck?"

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:39 PM (O848g)

405 so long as the pole dancer are naked who cares. do you have to tip in the denomination of the host country, the dancer, or does everyone want dollars?




Is there a champagne room competition? or is that the night before the competition like in all the other events?

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:40 PM (vuY5x)

406 Muldoon, what's a 90 year old doing at the fertility clinic?

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 17, 2017 11:40 PM (P8951)

407 Hi, Tammy!

I walk briskly or jog five days a week. When I don't, I miss it. It does help keep my blood pressure lower.

Posted by: Captain Whitebread at October 17, 2017 11:40 PM (rJUlF)

408 BTW that Vegas security guard is giving his first interview tomorrow on Ellen. Wonder what scared him off Hannity?
Posted by: keena at October 17, 2017 11:38 PM (RiTnx)

----------------------------------

Embarrassed not to be a a great "American".

Posted by: RioBravo at October 17, 2017 11:40 PM (giT7q)

409 Ironic to be making up an anal retentive wart sock, when I actually have compound W on my face...

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at October 17, 2017 11:41 PM (vChNs)

410 Attention everybody... does this online dating exchange means she is interested?
***
I'd say so...women don't usually respond if they aren't....but did she go three months between when you "smiled" at her and she responded?

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 11:41 PM (Z8FFX)

411 Attention everybody... does this online dating exchange means she is interested?


No.

It's not restraining-order level of not interested, but it's a not interested.

Keep talking, though. You should work yourself into safe-fallback territory and you'll be there when she eventually has her crisis.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at October 17, 2017 11:41 PM (gIRsn)

412 Posted by: Serious Cat at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (HaZvX)


Oh yeah. She wants the D from you, good and hard.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 11:41 PM (NWiLs)

413 Wonder what scared him off Hannity?

Posted by: keena at October 17, 2017 11:38 PM (RiTnx)

A remote chance of hardball questions?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:41 PM (O848g)

414 You know what I love? Mountains.




Mountains,
Mountains,
Mountains,
Mountains,
Mountains.




M-O-U-N-T-A-I-N-S




Mountains.




Cannot get enough of em.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:41 PM (vuY5x)

415 Posted by: Serious Cat at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (HaZvX)

It sounds friendly to me. I am often told I am too friendly and I have probably had this exact exchange with guys many times.

It's right in the hard-to-tell zone. I'd say it's friendly enough that she wouldn't be upset if you asked her out, at least.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 17, 2017 11:42 PM (kuFbc)

416 what's a 90 year old doing at the fertility clinic?

Having a stroke.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at October 17, 2017 11:42 PM (IcT7t)

417 "Have y'all heard the actual Disturbed version? It is stunning."

I haven't, but I'll look for it.

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at October 17, 2017 11:42 PM (398bZ)

418 She wants your manmeat bad. Trust me. They don't call me Captain Lovelog for nothing.
Posted by: otho at October 17, 2017 11:38 PM (qGuLD)

Damn. Here I thought you were otho.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:42 PM (4bU2r)

419
RioBravo is correct. But I thought the FAA had already established drone rules around airports? Just thought I'd heard that somewhere. Don't think we have our general aviation pilot here on the ONT any more, he might know.

But speaking of bird strikes, a Moron-like device used by aerospace companies in designing and testing aircraft - at least a few years back - was one of my favorites.

The frozen-chicken cannon. It's exactly what you think it is. Shoots frozen chickens at aircraft andcomponents to test their, um, bird-strike-worthiness.

Posted by: rhomboid at October 17, 2017 11:42 PM (QDnY+)

420 Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:41 PM (vuY5x)

Never enough mountains. I am in hill country, which is lovely, but there can never be too many mountains.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 17, 2017 11:43 PM (kuFbc)

421 And when did Jesus Campos return from his AWOL-itude?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:43 PM (O848g)

422 Mountains right?




Just big stupid rocks that sit there all smug and stupid not saying anything. Not even looking at you. Not once. Never even acknowledge you. But dang if they are not fun to look at all the time.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:44 PM (vuY5x)

423 he thinks I'm a GIRL!

Posted by: Susan at October 17, 2017 11:44 PM (vChNs)

424 And when did Jesus Campos return from his AWOL-itude?
***
Three days and three nights right?

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 11:45 PM (Z8FFX)

425 >>>"Have y'all heard the actual Disturbed version? It is stunning."

Agreed, Really well done.

Posted by: Max Power at October 17, 2017 11:45 PM (q177U)

426 Why does an 80 something UAW dude who was a death camp guard go down the shitter and Soros runs around a free man? Soros is the anti Christ.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:45 PM (KP5rU)

427 261 just wondering

If you're still around:

Thank you!

How's Lisa?

Posted by: ibguy at October 17, 2017 11:45 PM (vUcdz)

428 he thinks I'm a GIRL!
***
I once had someone on a dating sight pretend to be an American nurse student in...Ghana or something like that.

It was pretty funny.

Posted by: 18-1 at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (Z8FFX)

429 Ellen has a pic of him and the maintenance guy on her set so I'd say he gave the interview today to air tomorrow.

Posted by: keena at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (RiTnx)

430 Disturbed: Sound of Silence

http://preview.tinyurl.com/qapezua

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (kuFbc)

431 There's a region of Pennsyltucky known as "The Endless Mountains", so if you like mountains, there you go!

Posted by: Zettai Ryoiki at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (e9G8E)

432
MisHum, you've developed quite the groove with the ONT, methinks. Has a distinctive feel to it. A very worthy heir to Maet. Weirddave does a great job too. And CBD, when he's doing his marathon cob fill-in performances, of course gets the job done.

And if there's any danger of this being taken as sucking up, I have a torrent of invective and insults ready (as always!). Just let me know.

Posted by: rhomboid at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (QDnY+)

433 It's right in the hard-to-tell zone. I'd say it's friendly enough that she wouldn't be upset if you asked her out, at least.
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 17, 2017 11:42 PM (kuFbc)

Then...friendzoned.

Sorry. That's MY life.

Posted by: Captain Friendzone, uh, Whitebread at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (rJUlF)

434 Never enough mountains. I am in hill country, which is lovely, but there can never be too many mountains.
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October




I know right? I have a plan. First I am going to look at em real good. Up, down, left, right, forwards, backwards, light, dark, everywhichway.

then I am going to walk all over them the same way.




When I am done they are gonna know they done been walked.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (vuY5x)

435 , what's a 90 year old doing at the fertility clinic?

***

Reminiscing?

Posted by: Muldoon at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (wPiJc)

436 >> Hope your week is off to a good start!
>>Posted by: Serious Cat at

>> Your response: "Wanna fuck"

Best to send an unsolicited dick pic first. I hear they really like that.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 11:47 PM (8O3HH)

437 433 It's right in the hard-to-tell zone. I'd say it's friendly enough that she wouldn't be upset if you asked her out, at least.
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 17, 2017 11:42 PM (kuFbc)

Then...friendzoned.

Sorry. That's MY life.
Posted by: Captain Friendzone, uh, Whitebread at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (rJUlF)

The only way to win is not to play.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 11:47 PM (NWiLs)

438 Via GWP on the guard

http://tinyurl.com/y7muw4wg

Posted by: keena at October 17, 2017 11:47 PM (RiTnx)

439 Posted by: keena at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (RiTnx)

Probably why he "disappeared" before all the other interviews; she wanted exclusivity.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 17, 2017 11:47 PM (kuFbc)

440 420; Mountains are awesome. As long as somebody else is driving. Yeah, I'm a pussy.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:47 PM (KP5rU)

441 Captain Whitebread, did you get to make the audio commercial for Lonely Manwich by any chance? ;-)

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 17, 2017 11:47 PM (eMKNe)

442 >>>Susan: Hi Brendan! Yes, I am looking forward to the fall. You? Have a great weekend, Susan.

10/14/2017



Me: Yes, very much so. I sleep better and have more energy in cooler weather.

10/14/2017



Susan: Sounds you really love the fall. Hope your week is off to a good start!

10/16/2017


Posted by: Serious Cat at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (HaZvX)<<<




Meh.



If she said something like "I know a great way to keep you up all night and sap all of your energy!" then maybe she'd be interested.



And if she followed it up with "Yeah, let me show you this thing called the AoSHQ ONT" she'd be a keeper!

Posted by: an indifferent penguin at October 17, 2017 11:47 PM (E3EdC)

443 It is always wise to listen to Tammy.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 17, 2017 11:48 PM (6FqZa)

444 The only way to win is not to play.
Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 11:47 PM (NWiLs)


For certain values of "winning".

Posted by: Captain Friendzone, uh, Whitebread at October 17, 2017 11:48 PM (rJUlF)

445 192 Baby killer Patrick Tomlinson made a big Twatter splash today with his thought experiment about a fire in an artificial insemination clinic. You can either save 1000 fertilized embryos or a five year old boy. If you pick the boy, it means you know the embryos aren't alive or aren't human or something. If you could either save a five year o!d or a ninety-five year old and you choose the five year old it means great grandpa wasn't alive or wasn't human or something.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I'm Dreaming of a White Privilege



How about throwing Patrick Tomlinson into the fire and watching him burn to death? Thats ok, right?

Posted by: Puddleglum at October 17, 2017 11:48 PM (pY+s4)

446 Damn. Here I thought you were otho.


Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:42 PM


It's what the ladies call me. Well, they do if they don't want to get the hose again.

Posted by: otho at October 17, 2017 11:48 PM (qGuLD)

447 Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (vuY5x)

Jealous!

Although I like to just sit on my ass and stare at them as well!

Have you been to Georgetown yet?

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 17, 2017 11:48 PM (kuFbc)

448 used to be when I was up this late listening to Sting my mom would yell at me to go to bed before I missed my bus and was late for home room.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:48 PM (vuY5x)

449 444 The only way to win is not to play.
Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 11:47 PM (NWiLs)

For certain values of "winning".
Posted by: Captain Friendzone, uh, Whitebread at October 17, 2017 11:48 PM (rJUlF)

You have to be flexible in your definitions. It's the only way to say semi-sane and not completely miserable.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 11:49 PM (NWiLs)

450 194 OK, guys, have any of you noticed the short haired ginger chick on the iPhone 8 commercial? To me she looks androgynous and weird and the commercial bothers me because I suspect they're trying to pass off a rather asexual look as an ideal.
Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V.



Also, she's very creepy. Like serial killer creepy.

Posted by: Puddleglum at October 17, 2017 11:49 PM (pY+s4)

451 402

Well, I'll be. I've seen it all. Jes' grease my butt and get a ficus stuck up it:

Jimmy Fallon is making fun of Hillary for the Russian uranium bribe crap. Had a Hillary impersonator on the phone, acting drunk about the Chardonnay.

I can't believe it.
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 11:38 PM (8O3HH)
*******************
Gonna be a damned shame when he's found dead with a bullet hole in him and no bullet.

Posted by: Democrats at October 17, 2017 11:49 PM (6dFYM)

452 when I was up this late listening to Sting my mom would yell at me to

... go find some wholesome porn instead because she's worried you're going gay?

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 17, 2017 11:49 PM (6FqZa)

453 what's a 90 year old doing at the fertility clinic?

Earning about $5 a month.

Posted by: t-bird at October 17, 2017 11:50 PM (tIhIY)

454 Marginally SFW, depending on where you work.
Posted by: Country Singer


That was fucking amazing. Fitness is sexy, and she was dressed more conservatively than most beach-volleyball players.

Posted by: Oedipus at October 17, 2017 11:50 PM (CXLVd)

455 You are going to have to do more than just talk about the weather. Sorry. Up your game or get a cat like mine.


Anyhow. For this exchange I expect things thrown at me:

Dear DNC, will Hillary always maintain her pert conical breasts that don't require artificial support?

--Hopeful in Chappa-eye


Dear Hopeful in Chappa-eye, Yes, our beloved Hillary will always have pert and conical breast, but she will have to reconcile herself to spending all her time walking around on her hands and knees.

--DNC

Posted by: Kindltot at October 17, 2017 11:50 PM (ywxMx)

456 Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 17, 2017 11:48 PM (6FqZa)

* rummages all around Zim's person, looking for sarc tags*

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 17, 2017 11:51 PM (kuFbc)

457 And if there's any danger of this being taken as sucking up, I have a torrent of invective and insults ready (as always!). Just let me know.

Posted by: rhomboid at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (QDnY+)


I don't know if I should thank you or cuss you out?

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:51 PM (4bU2r)

458 Vendette!




Was thinking of you earlier. We had something of a Joan Crawford wire hanger moment with paper plates.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:51 PM (vuY5x)

459 Susan: Sounds you really love the fall. Hope your week is off to a good start!


Me: "You bet I do! The fur-lined wrist restraints are just right for the crisp weather, and hint ironically at Chrismas.

Don't you just love to be splayed on a lovely wool tartan Pendleton blanket while the leather dries and tightens? Fall is the best!"

Posted by: Bandersnatch at October 17, 2017 11:51 PM (gIRsn)

460 Anybody watch Jeopardy tonight? I'm still trying to figure out what pronoun best fits the contestant named "Fran".
Posted by: mark1971 at October 17, 2017 10:12 PM (xPl2J)

Darn, I didn't watch it. There was a tranny or somethin' on one of the Forged in Fire shows this season. The one with the masters and apprentices IIRC.

Posted by: andycanuck at October 17, 2017 11:52 PM (mJ8mX)

461 457 And if there's any danger of this being taken as sucking up, I have a torrent of invective and insults ready (as always!). Just let me know.

Posted by: rhomboid at October 17, 2017 11:46 PM (QDnY+)


I don't know if I should thank you or cuss you out?

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:51 PM (4bU2r)

When in doubt, cuss 'em out!

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 11:52 PM (NWiLs)

462 424 And when did Jesus Campos return from his AWOL-itude?
***
Three days and three nights right?

They had to re-cast the part.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 17, 2017 11:52 PM (V2Yro)

463 what's a 90 year old doing at the fertility clinic?




dropping off a dozen sperm.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:52 PM (vuY5x)

464 Yeah, I'm a pussy.
Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:47 PM (KP5rU)

No comment!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 17, 2017 11:52 PM (kuFbc)

465
Oh yeah. She wants the D from you, good and hard.
Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 11:41 PM (NWiLs)

"D"? As in "D"ropping autumn leaves?

Posted by: Serious Cat at October 17, 2017 11:53 PM (HaZvX)

466 440 420; Mountains are awesome. As long as somebody else is driving. Yeah, I'm a pussy.
Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:47 PM (KP5rU)

You need to drive the Apache Trail my friend.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:53 PM (4bU2r)

467 28 CharlieBrown'sDildo, Dammit, now I need a gin and tonic!!

Posted by: lousagirl at October 17, 2017 11:53 PM (9plvG)

468 They got an illegal caught in Santa Rosa with a lighter & a fire extinguisher leaving the scene of a small brush fire. He has arson priors (plural). He is in a sanctuary city.

Dem's going nuts defending him as not the source of ANY of the 21 fires in the region that had death dealing fires. They're claiming racism.

Posted by: torabora at October 17, 2017 11:54 PM (6dFYM)

469 365,
Always hire a security guy who's afraid of women.
http://tinyurl.com/y6we6yaa

"Laura Loomer's fault Jesus Campos is 'missing,' says LVMPD"

Posted by: geoffb at October 17, 2017 11:54 PM (zOpu5)

470 >> You need to drive the Apache Trail my friend.

Is that a euphemism? Like my former love guv, Mark Sanford, who famously "hiked the Appalachian Trail"?

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 11:54 PM (8O3HH)

471 Will Jesus get to dance with Ellen?
I heard everybody who goes on Ellen has to dance.
I do not dance, and so I do not want to go on Ellen.

Are they sure they've got the appointment sheet straight?
Could this be that other Jesus, the one with the forest fire?

There's a lot of Hey Zeuses running around this week.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 17, 2017 11:55 PM (H5rtT)

472 465
Oh yeah. She wants the D from you, good and hard.
Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 11:41 PM (NWiLs)

"D"? As in "D"ropping autumn leaves?
Posted by: Serious Cat at October 17, 2017 11:53 PM (HaZvX)

Not exactly.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 11:55 PM (NWiLs)

473 Jealous!

Although I like to just sit on my ass and stare at them as well!

Have you been to Georgetown yet?
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October




Sister, and I say that with all humanly possible affection, I ain't been nowhere. Phone, phone, phone, phone, phone. Drive, drive, drive, drive, drive. Unpack, unpack, unpack, unpack, unpack. Stupid stuff, stupid stuff, stupid stuff, stupid stuff, stupid stuff, Dogs, dogs, dogs, dogs, dogs. sleep. restart.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:55 PM (vuY5x)

474 459 Susan: Sounds you really love the fall. Hope your week is off to a good start!


Me: "You bet I do! The fur-lined wrist restraints are just right for the crisp weather, and hint ironically at Chrismas.

Don't you just love to be splayed on a lovely wool tartan Pendleton blanket while the leather dries and tightens? Fall is the best!"
Posted by: Bandersnatch at October 17, 2017 11:51 PM (gIRsn


You had me until the Wool blanket part. That's just too itchy and uncomfortable.

Posted by: Love Connection at October 17, 2017 11:55 PM (4bU2r)

475 You need to drive the Apache Trail my friend.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:53 PM (4bU2r)

You mean the one that goes to Tortilla Flats?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:55 PM (O848g)

476 "You need to drive the Apache Trail my friend. "

2 years ago I took a used cadillac with bald tires down the Apache Trail. Scared the hell out of the wife, still hasn't really forgiven me for that.

kind of a long story about how we ended up in a position that we needed to do that. Part of it was that it had been about 30 years since I had been down it, and I was sure it must have been improved since then.

hell that road hasn't been improved since 1920.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 17, 2017 11:56 PM (V2Yro)

477 You need to drive the Apache Trail my friend.
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October




What's that?

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:56 PM (vuY5x)

478 470 >> You need to drive the Apache Trail my friend.

Is that a euphemism? Like my former love guv, Mark Sanford, who famously "hiked the Appalachian Trail"?
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 11:54 PM (8O3HH)

No, it's a scary ass ride in the AZ mountains

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:57 PM (4bU2r)

479 a friend of mine discovered when she was almost 40 that she had a sister - a full sister - in SC. Her parents were high school sweethearts in small town in ND in the 50s. her mom got pregnant, went to live with an aunt in the Twin Cities and gave the baby up for adoption there. A few years later her
Parents got married and had a boy and a girl. My friend found out she had a sister when the woman in SC contacted her mother. She was very upset that her parents had never told her about her sister.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 17, 2017 11:57 PM (P8951)

480 Tammy, luv ya! MH, been there done that. Nope.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 17, 2017 11:57 PM (KP5rU)

481 469 365,
Always hire a security guy who's afraid of women.
http://tinyurl.com/y6we6yaa

"Laura Loomer's fault Jesus Campos is 'missing,' says LVMPD"
Posted by: geoffb at October 17, 2017 11:54 PM (zOpu5)

That's just lame.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 11:58 PM (NWiLs)

482 475 You need to drive the Apache Trail my friend.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:53 PM (4bU2r)

You mean the one that goes to Tortilla Flats?
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:55 PM (O848g)

Started up by a lake and down to Apache Junction? My FIL drove us a few years back. White knuckler. He just laughed at us. My MIL knew better and stayed at home.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:58 PM (4bU2r)

483 Oh, so the apache trail is a euphemism for hairless private parts on a lady? Guess it is better to call it a brazillian than a scalping.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:58 PM (vuY5x)

484 In honer of the latest media coverage of Hillary's selling of our Uranium to the Russians:

SOKOV!

(BTW, JFYI, Ohio liquor lisencees have Amsterdam 100 proof vodka for $22, 1.75L)

Posted by: bergerbilder at October 17, 2017 11:59 PM (lIZQs)

485 There's something called European Wax Center, nearby where I live.

It's fun sometimes just to stand outside and listen to all the "ouch!!"es. :-P

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 17, 2017 11:59 PM (eMKNe)

486 Speaking of "Hey Zeus", that reminds of something years ago. A 20-something Publius had gone on a damn cruise, where he remained in a state on intense inebriation for about 1 week.

There were a bunch of us, all drunk off our asses, eating dinner, and we had a waiter named "Jesus", right there on the name tag.

We just pronounced it "Jesus", and had a ball. Some might have considered it sacrilegious. "Hey, Jesus, how about turn some water into more wine?" Crap like that all dinner long.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 17, 2017 11:59 PM (8O3HH)

487 Started up by a lake and down to Apache Junction? My FIL drove us a few years back. White knuckler. He just laughed at us. My MIL knew better and stayed at home.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 17, 2017 11:58 PM (4bU2r)

I did that in 2014, I think. Ford rental pickup, Apache Junction to Roosevelt Lake to Tortilla Flats to Globe to Superior, and back to AJ on Hwy 60. Nice trip; road not very scary.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 18, 2017 12:00 AM (O848g)

488
torabora, that's wonderful - I mean, I'd heard one illegal was in detention, homeless guy, walking out of an area with smoke, yadda yadda yadda, but that was easily dismissed with "what, they didn't find 100 illegal urban campers walking out of the river beds?"

But - multiple arson priors? Lighter and (WTF?) fire extinguisher? Oh my.

ICE has a detainer for this guy, I believe. Which CA law (taking effect in January) would block from being honored by Santa Rosa sheriff/PD, and wouldn't surprise me if the stupid city already has a lawlessness policy.

Oh, I hope to allah one of these major fires can be pinned on an illegal.

Just to watch the continuing metaphorical conflagration of stupidity and racism that is CA government (supported, or tolerated, by the voters).

Posted by: rhomboid at October 18, 2017 12:01 AM (QDnY+)

489 Posted by: Serious Cat at October 17, 2017 11:53 PM (HaZvX)

I'd wait for one more exchange, then ask about meeting for coffee one Sat/Sun morning.

Should clarify that it should be an exchange above and beyond work/school, of a personal nature.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:01 AM (kuFbc)

490 I've read the silly Patty Duke idea of identical cousins actually contained a grain of truth in that when unwed girls gave birth to twins prior to the sexual revolution it wasn't uncommon for for different couples in the girls extended family to each adopt a twin and tell them they were cousins.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 18, 2017 12:01 AM (P8951)

491 So, that loesch woman had to move because she was getting threats over that beet juice?

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:01 AM (vuY5x)

492 Hey mang, I hope you enjoyed your creme brulee. I put my essence into it.

Posted by: Jesus the waiter at October 18, 2017 12:02 AM (6FqZa)

493 I think I stayed in Cheap Sleep once. Not a bad place.
Posted by: Tim in Illinois

Was that next to the gas station and diner, 'Eat Here, Get Gas'?

Posted by: Jersey 1965 at October 18, 2017 12:02 AM (v9gSJ)

494 The best part of the apache trail is that it's a one lane road covered with loose-ass gravel, and the only thing between you and the 300 foot cliffs on the side of the road is a little 12" high berm of gravel that the road grader scooped there. But most of the time not even that is there.

Some friends of mine were on it in an old Willys Jeep many years back, on one hard turn he forgot to tell the passenger that the door latches on that old jeep didn't work too well, he took one turn and the passengers door popped open, passenger popped out hanging only onto the open window, feet kicking about 200 feet over the rocks below.

that is one hell of a road.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 18, 2017 12:02 AM (V2Yro)

495
I did that in 2014, I think. Ford rental pickup, Apache Junction to Roosevelt Lake to Tortilla Flats to Globe to Superior, and back to AJ on Hwy 60. Nice trip; road not very scary.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 18, 2017 12:00 AM (O848g)

We did something like that in reverse order from Mesa to Roosevelt down the Apache Trail. I for one did not care for the "Trail". I think going down would be worse than going up.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 18, 2017 12:02 AM (4bU2r)

496 391 Yeah he took her out in one swing, like he caught her in bed with his wife, without him,again.
Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (vuY5x)

Really?! wow he must be much sprier than he looks. can he even straighten up with that arthritic old back? i mean shit, he creaks when he shuffles!

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 12:03 AM (hscyr)

497 You mean the one that goes to Tortilla Flats?
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 17, 2017 11:55 PM (O848g)

I thought it went to Pizmo Beach and all the clams I could eat.
/Bugs Bunny

Posted by: Captain Friendzone, uh, Whitebread at October 18, 2017 12:03 AM (rJUlF)

498 Serious Cat: "Susan, do you know how to pole dance?"

10/18/17

Posted by: an indifferent penguin at October 18, 2017 12:03 AM (E3EdC)

499 "Every day for 20 years, the guy pushed an empty wheelbarrow to the gate."

That creepy metrosexual chick in the is-it-a-camera-or-a-phone ad?
You can't decide which of the many genders she is right now?

She stole that damn hat. Right in front of you, too.

Bet she'll rob banks when she grows up.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 12:03 AM (H5rtT)

500 The only road that scared the hell out of me was the million dollar highway into Ouray, CO. Million dollar highway, my ass. Pot should have been legal back then.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 18, 2017 12:03 AM (KP5rU)

501 Hey, where all da white wimmen at?

Posted by: Sheriff Bart at October 18, 2017 12:04 AM (1kkde)

502 ICE has a detainer for this guy, I believe. Which CA law (taking effect in January) would block from being honored by Santa Rosa sheriff/PD, and wouldn't surprise me if the stupid city already has a lawlessness policy.

Oh, I hope to allah one of these major fires can be pinned on an illegal.

Just to watch the continuing metaphorical conflagration of stupidity and racism that is CA government (supported, or tolerated, by the voters).

Posted by: rhomboid at October 18, 2017 12:01 AM (QDnY+)

What would stop ICE from sending in a SWAT team to surround the facility where this douchebag is being held?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 18, 2017 12:04 AM (O848g)

503 Driving in the Superstition Mountains near Phoenix was scary enough, especially after the sun began to fall.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 18, 2017 12:05 AM (P8951)

504 >> Hey mang, I hope you enjoyed your creme brulee. I
>> put my essence into it.

Actually, he was having a ball, and was well tipped. He was used to a bunch of drunks, I think. And he liked the drunk girls more than us, I think.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 12:05 AM (8O3HH)

505 Crap, I mean set set not fall.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 18, 2017 12:06 AM (P8951)

506 90 I've read the silly Patty Duke idea of identical cousins actually contained a grain of truth in that when unwed girls gave birth to twins prior to the sexual revolution it wasn't uncommon for for different couples in the girls extended family to each adopt a twin and tell them they were cousins.

+++

What's wrong with that?

Posted by: Muslims Worldwide at October 18, 2017 12:06 AM (v9gSJ)

507 Posted by: yankeefifth at October 17, 2017 11:55 PM (vuY5x)

I highly recommend it when you get to a point where you can relax.

Probably nothing any more charming that what you might find in any small town in sodak, but a lovely setting, if nothing else.

Also, there's a really good pizza place in Idaho Springs and if I could only remember the name of it, I'd tell ya!

Finally, when you have extra time, the drive down from Telluride to Durango is also stunning.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:06 AM (kuFbc)

508 Night all. Be well everybody.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 18, 2017 12:07 AM (KP5rU)

509 I highly recommend it when you get to a point where you can relax.

Probably nothing any more charming that what you might find in any small town in sodak, but a lovely setting, if nothing else.

Also, there's a really good pizza place in Idaho Springs and if I could only remember the name of it, I'd tell ya!

Finally, when you have extra time, the drive down from Telluride to Durango is also stunning.
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October




Will. Do.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:08 AM (vuY5x)

510 I'll bet a drone with some C4 in it would be a helluva thing.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM (V2Yro)


You know, I hadn't even thought about that. You'd never know the difference. Until the earth-shattering kaboom, that is.

Posted by: HTL at October 18, 2017 12:08 AM (0l8E+)

511 Grrrrrrr this stupid IPad!! I hate typing on this thing. goodnight, horde and thanks for the ONT, Mis Hum.

Doesn't look like its the Cubs' night.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 18, 2017 12:08 AM (P8951)

512 No.

It's not restraining-order level of not interested, but it's a not interested.

...
Posted by: Bandersnatch at October 17, 2017 11:41 PM (gIRsn)

That's my best guess. I figure a person will ask a question back or say something playful if they want to keep conversation going. I'm not so sure myself, one of her pics has a date stamp of Oct-2010. :/

Posted by: Serious Cat at October 18, 2017 12:08 AM (HaZvX)

513 We did something like that in reverse order from Mesa to Roosevelt down the Apache Trail. I for one did not care for the "Trail". I think going down would be worse than going up.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 18, 2017 12:02 AM (4bU2r)

That is the "down" direction. You lose a lot of elevation going from Roosevelt Lake to Tortilla Flats. Road clings to a cliff-side. But I never found it to be scary. Very neat old bar in Tortilla Flats. I am in Apache Junction right now. Maybe I should do that tour again, soon.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 18, 2017 12:09 AM (O848g)

514 I've driven the Telluride to Boulder alone with basically just my left arm. I'd busted the right rotary cuff on the slopes. I was here when I reported the crash (hash, "Jew6x"... difficult to forget that one).

Not sure exactly why G-d is keeping me alive, but He does seem to be doing it . . .

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 18, 2017 12:10 AM (6FqZa)

515 um, the crash on the slopes. I didn't crash the car.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 18, 2017 12:10 AM (6FqZa)

516 Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 18, 2017 12:03 AM (KP5rU)

LOL!

I could name a few other rides that'd probably make ya wet yourself.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:11 AM (kuFbc)

517 Highway 129, Deals Gap, NC. Not a lot of elevation changes, but, 318 curves in 11 miles. Fun to ride at night.

http://tinyurl.com/yaanlsns

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at October 18, 2017 12:11 AM (7Cr6v)

518 Muslims Worldwide, nothing wrong with it unless they marry each other and even if they are sick enough to do so, it's not like identical twins can mate and reproduce.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 18, 2017 12:12 AM (P8951)

519 516; Wouldn't take much, at my age. Ha,ha.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 18, 2017 12:12 AM (KP5rU)

520 There is a very good barbecue place in Idaho Springs, right up next to the Interstate (like most of the town considering). A block away, there's a ten-foot-high statue of Milt Cainiff's most famous character, from when they changed the name of the place to Steve Canyon.

Driven that Mount Wilson road? It should be closed by now, but, good 'un.
I always wonder what dinner was like in that restaurant, before the explosion.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 12:12 AM (H5rtT)

521 Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 18, 2017 12:10 AM (6FqZa)

I think I was still lurking, but maybe not. Same nic?

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:12 AM (kuFbc)

522 "503 Driving in the Superstition Mountains near Phoenix was scary enough, especially after the sun began to fall."

even scarier than that was hiking in the Superstition mountains, on what was supposed to be a day trip, and forgetting which way was out as the sun began to fall.

we made a last minute guess, found a way to slide down a dry 30' waterfall in a dry wash and got out as the light faded.

There's been a whole lot of people who quietly end up dead if they get caught alone out in the Superstitions after dark. It's been going on for decades, maybe longer. Sometimes odd, large caliber bullet holes - sometimes just scattered parts found many months later.

not many places that I would actually be scared to be in after dark, but that's one of them.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 18, 2017 12:12 AM (V2Yro)

523 >>>That's my best guess. I figure a person will ask a
question back or say something playful if they want to keep conversation
going. I'm not so sure myself, one of her pics has a date stamp of
Oct-2010. :/

Posted by: Serious Cat at October 18, 2017 12:08 AM (HaZvX)<<<

DANGER! DANGER, SERIOUS CAT!
After 10 years she could be at forklift/opening-up-an-entire-wall-to-escape-the-bedroom territory.

Posted by: Robbie the Sex Robot at October 18, 2017 12:14 AM (E3EdC)

524 Good evening all

Posted by: AmericanKestrel at October 18, 2017 12:15 AM (IDhUW)

525 Mountains don't exist.

Posted by: Nightvale City Council at October 18, 2017 12:16 AM (QBrQE)

526 427 261 just wondering
If you're still around:
Thank you!
How's Lisa?

Ibguy, Lisa (my sister in treatment for a brain tumor) is just OK. She is weaker, sleeps more and has less energy, but tests so far are inconclusive. Doctors don't know why she feels so tired. I suggested genetic and thyroid testing, and those are underway. It's frustrating, and we appreciate everyones' prayers. Thanks. Prayers for all the caregivers out there.

Posted by: Just wondering at October 18, 2017 12:16 AM (WBYpW)

527 Attention everybody... does this online dating exchange means she is interested?

You sent Susan a smile!
7/23/2017

Susan sent you a smile!
10/10/2017

Me: Hi Susan! Are you looking forward to autumn weather moving in?
10/12/2017

Susan: Hi Brendan! Yes, I am looking forward to the fall. You? Have a great weekend, Susan.
10/14/2017

Me: Yes, very much so. I sleep better and have more energy in cooler weather.
10/14/2017

Susan: Sounds you really love the fall. Hope your week is off to a good start!
10/16/2017



Posted by: Serious Cat at October




Yeah, little advice for you here.

In this instance you should go with rule 675.2 - Get them before they get you.

Your next reply should be "Well guess this is not going to work out since I am a guy that enjoys warm fall afternoons, sipping spiced rum on the deck of my cabin watching the leaves turn by the fire pit while you are more at home in the frozen steppes or tundra where you will be able to run around all winter in the perpetual darkness without fear of the sun setting you on fire or temperatures warm enough to melt that chunk of ice you call your heart you stone cold ice princess.

Best regards.

By the way, you ok with me asking your mom on a date?

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:17 AM (vuY5x)

528 I rode the Big Thompson River canyon road by full moonlight, down into Rocky Mountain Park, the year before the flash flood killed all those people. You really know you're in the mountains. Both ways out of Grand Junction on a bright night gives the same impression, but it's not as challenging.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 12:17 AM (H5rtT)

529 For those with a passing interest in the air war of World War II - Operation Tidal Wave. This site is very fascinating and can give one an information OD.

http://www.low-level-ploesti.org/

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at October 18, 2017 12:17 AM (IfMM+)

530 The road up to Jerome is somewhat nerve wracking, if that sort of thing makes you nervous.

None of it bothers me.

Well, I do NOT like driving down Hwy 1 from Big Sur to the area before San Simeon.

I love the ride, but I do not want to be the one driving in that direction. Headed up is not as bad, I can do that.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:17 AM (kuFbc)

531
AOP, nothing (stopping ICE from staking out the facility where detainer-perp is housed). In fact similar things are already done (waiting outside courthouses, etc) to snap up illegals.

But I love your idea. Very, very, very high profile. With the political set-up that actually applies, overall, to illegal migration: authorities enforcing law vs. idiot locals who are making effort to "protect" someone who might have burned down half the county. Perfect.

I still prefer serious federal action to punish and end this lawlessness, but am pessimistic that the administration is serious or knows what's at stake in this. So this ridiculous game between leviathan and vulnerable little mouse will continue.

Posted by: rhomboid at October 18, 2017 12:18 AM (QDnY+)

532 Tammy, 6 Feb 2016

Although it was 9 Feb when I admitted to the Horde, yeah, that shoulder wasn't working
http://minx.cc:1080/?post=361443

It did get better later!

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 18, 2017 12:19 AM (6FqZa)

533 503 Driving in the Superstition Mountains near Phoenix was scary enough, especially after the sun began to fall.
Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 18, 2017 12:05 AM (P


I love those.
Could see them from my in laws house.
Miss going to Mesa in teh winter.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 18, 2017 12:19 AM (4bU2r)

534 Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 18, 2017 12:19 AM (6FqZa)

Oh hell, I am thinking of something/one else, that was just last year!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:20 AM (kuFbc)

535 Posted by: Blutarski-esque 0.0 at October 17, 2017 10:19 PM (+Tibp)
I loved that show. Irked the snot outta me when they were all, oops, mommy dead, no big, here's Leah the Annoying.
Posted by: Peaches at October




Really, I always imagined you and she could have been separated at birth. Your parents kept you and sent you off the the classy boarding school and raised you in a life of refinement and privilege. While she was stolen by gypsies and made her way grifting and slipping men mickeys.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:20 AM (vuY5x)

536 Nice ONT Mis Hum
I appreciate the Churchill quote bc while I would prefer people like my decisions I'm getting better at accepting the fact that sometimes they won't and that's ok.

Posted by: AmericanKestrel at October 18, 2017 12:21 AM (IDhUW)

537 Muslims Worldwide, nothing wrong with it unless they marry each other and even if they are sick enough to do so, it's not like identical twins can mate and reproduce.
Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 18, 2017 12:12 AM (P8951)

Donna, I'm playing off the documented centuries of muslim inbreeding with 1st cousins, and inherent low iq of the resultant population. Ask any suicide bomber!

Posted by: Muslims Worldwide at October 18, 2017 12:21 AM (v9gSJ)

538 Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:17 AM (Tnhbr)

Neeeext up! Plenty of fish in the sea. And Spain!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:21 AM (kuFbc)

539 That is the "down" direction. You lose a lot of elevation going from Roosevelt Lake to Tortilla Flats. Road clings to a cliff-side. But I never found it to be scary. Very neat old bar in Tortilla Flats. I am in Apache Junction right now. Maybe I should do that tour again, soon.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 18, 2017 12:09 AM (O848g)


Not much for mts in WI we are not use to those.
Who knows we might be neighbors if we move to the Payson area.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 18, 2017 12:22 AM (4bU2r)

540 yeah, I know. the situation I was referring to is a bit different though

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 18, 2017 12:23 AM (P8951)

541 >>Plenty of fish in the sea.

And plenty of tadpoles in the ficus. And carpet. And frying pans. And......

Posted by: Uncle Harvey at October 18, 2017 12:23 AM (8O3HH)

542 osted by: Just wondering at October 18, 2017 12:16 AM (WBYpW

Prayers for everyone with cancer.

FUCK cancer.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 18, 2017 12:26 AM (4bU2r)

543 540 I just bought 2 places on this side of Seligman, Apache Junction too far and on the wrong side for me

Posted by: MAxIE at October 18, 2017 12:27 AM (9TR2V)

544 wouldn't mind retiring in the Phoenix area. I hate winter more and more. Not crazy about snakes and scorpions and big spiders though. still preferable to ice and snow.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 18, 2017 12:28 AM (P8951)

545 545 Yeesh and too far south and hot.
Seligman like 5000 ft.

Posted by: MAxIE at October 18, 2017 12:29 AM (9TR2V)

546 543 Neeeext up! Plenty of fish in the sea. And Spain!
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:21 AM (kuFbc)

I'm 35. The fish are rapidly dwindling. But I'm not dwelling on it. I wished her well and got back to work. And yes, I'm excited for Germany and Spain in less than a month!
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:23 AM (Tnhbr)

35 and the fish are dwindling? Shit. I guess there are no fish for me then.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:29 AM (NWiLs)

547 537 Nice ONT Mis Hum
I appreciate the Churchill quote bc while I would prefer people like my decisions I'm getting better at accepting the fact that sometimes they won't and that's ok.
Posted by: AmericanKestrel at October 18, 2017 12:21 AM (IDhUW


Thanks.

Once upon a time I had a boss who always told us. When you have to make a decision, make one, right, wrong or otherwise. Indecisiveness is worse than no decision at all.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 18, 2017 12:29 AM (4bU2r)

548 I am sensing a lot of Flatlanders get the heebie jeebies in the mountains.

Totally understandable.

I remember the first time this little mountain girl traveled across the country... went to sleep in Rabun Gap GA, woke up as we were driving through Kansas.

I got hysterical. Felt like something was gonna come flying down right out of the sky and snatch me clean away.

Truth be told, the open prairie can still creep me out a little, lovely though it is.

The mountains comfort and cradle me. I feel safe in them, protected somehow.



Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:29 AM (kuFbc)

549
Another day, another hot teacher banging her boy students.

http://preview.tinyurl.com/ydxsbmu7

The boy was 14, and said something about threesomes with her. With who else is not known apparently.

Her husband has left her and got custody of their children.

Can you imagine the humiliation of your wife banging a damned 14 yr old, over you? ....

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 12:30 AM (8O3HH)

550 46 wouldn't mind retiring in the Phoenix area. I hate winter more and more. Not crazy about snakes and scorpions and big spiders though. still preferable to ice and snow.
Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 18, 2017 12:28 AM (P8951)


Payson, Flagstaff, Hebert Ovvergard are all nice areas. Not so damn hot in the summer and 4 seasosn.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 18, 2017 12:31 AM (4bU2r)

551 Attention everybody... does this online dating exchange means she is interested?

You sent Susan a smile!
7/23/2017

Susan sent you a smile!
10/10/2017

Posted by: Serious Cat at October

I dunno, kind of a slow start there.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 12:31 AM (Jcg9Q)

552 As inarticulate as the Trump might be at times sometimes he really knocks it out of the park.

https://tinyurl.com/ydeh28ru

Posted by: SpiffTheSpaceman at October 18, 2017 12:32 AM (U49qd)

553 551
Another day, another hot teacher banging her boy students.

http://preview.tinyurl.com/ydxsbmu7

The boy was 14, and said something about threesomes with her. With who else is not known apparently.

Her husband has left her and got custody of their children.

Can you imagine the humiliation of your wife banging a damned 14 yr old, over you? ....
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 12:30 AM (8O3HH)

Something similar actually happened to a guy I know. Seriously fucked up situation.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:32 AM (NWiLs)

554 The mountains comfort and cradle me. I feel safe in them, protected somehow.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor
-------------

Couple next door moved here from Colorado, not sure where. The woman told me that she feels claustrophobic here because of all of the trees.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at October 18, 2017 12:33 AM (7Cr6v)

555 Oh please, I'm a damned almost 54 year old woman and I'd have no trouble getting me a man if I needed one, quit your worrying. There's someone out there for everyone, y'all just too scarred to keep fishing.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:33 AM (kuFbc)

556 557 Oh please, I'm a damned almost 54 year old woman and I'd have no trouble getting me a man if I needed one, quit your worrying. There's someone out there for everyone, y'all just too scarred to keep fishing.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:33 AM (kuFbc)

Huge difference. You're a woman. It's easy.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:34 AM (NWiLs)

557 550 I am sensing a lot of Flatlanders get the heebie jeebies in the mountains.
Totally understandable.
I remember the first time this little mountain girl traveled across the country... went to sleep in Rabun Gap GA, woke up as we were driving through Kansas.
I got hysterical. Felt like something was gonna come flying down right out of the sky and snatch me clean away.
Truth be told, the open prairie can still creep me out a little, lovely though it is.
The mountains comfort and cradle me. I feel safe in them, protected somehow.
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:29 AM (kuFbc)

I was the same way my first few trips across the plains. It was intensely uncomfortable.

Posted by: The Inexplicable Dr. Julius Strangepork at October 18, 2017 12:34 AM (QBrQE)

558 Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at October 18, 2017 12:33 AM (7Cr6v)

Probably east CO, it's high plains.

I have heard many people say that, though.

I feel panicky without trees.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:34 AM (kuFbc)

559 Well it is no one's fault but your own that it did not work out with the persian princess. You knew exactly what to do.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:35 AM (vuY5x)

560 >> I dunno, kind of a slow start there.

I'll say!

Posted by: Uncle Harvey at October 18, 2017 12:35 AM (8O3HH)

561 Yeah, Tami, I'm a bit uneasy about mountains. Wisconsin isn't nearly as flat as Illinois or Iowa, but actual mountains fascinate me and alienate me a bit. I like having them in the background.

Posted by: Donna&&&&&&V. at October 18, 2017 12:35 AM (P8951)

562 It's cold in Flag and the trains make too much noise. It gets cold in Heber too. Now Payson is a slice of heaven. Last night 40 degrees and today 80. Beautiful!

Posted by: muchas buchas at October 18, 2017 12:35 AM (x5k2g)

563 >>>I dunno, kind of a slow start there.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 12:31 AM (Jcg9Q)<<<

Maybe Susan is an Ent.

Posted by: zombie J.R.R Tolkien at October 18, 2017 12:36 AM (E3EdC)

564 Female teacher banging school boy...

Isn't that the story of the President of France?

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at October 18, 2017 12:36 AM (IfMM+)

565 557 Tammy is very correct
Finding women is hard when you're on the AoS 10 hours every day
Also jobs

Posted by: MAxIE at October 18, 2017 12:37 AM (9TR2V)

566 You sent Susan a smile!
7/23/2017

Susan sent you a smile!
10/10/2017

Posted by: Serious Cat at October

I dunno, kind of a slow start there.
Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October




Yeah, it should have started

You sent Susan a schlong pic!
7/23/2017

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:37 AM (vuY5x)

567 Oh please, I'm a damned almost 54 year old woman and I'd have no trouble getting me a man if I needed one, quit your worrying. There's someone out there for everyone, y'all just too scarred to keep fishing.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:33 AM (kuFbc)

Huge difference. You're a woman. It's easy.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:34 AM (NWiLs)

Bingo.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 12:37 AM (Jcg9Q)

568 567 35 and the fish are dwindling? Shit. I guess there are no fish for me then.
Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:29 AM (NWiLs)

I want kids. Plural. That means I'm stuck with women under 32. Basically 28-32.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:36 AM (Tnhbr)

Ah, a man with a plan.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:37 AM (NWiLs)

569 I was the same way my first few trips across the plains. It was intensely uncomfortable.
Posted by: The Inexplicable Dr. Julius Strangepork at October 18, 2017 12:34 AM (QBrQE)

Indeed.

Hell, I was in my 30s the first time I went to western WA; nothing but dried wheat as far as the eye could see.

I was like, what in the actual fuck?! Very, very unsettling. Like a whole 'nuther planet.

It was my first trip to WA state and I was expecting the whole Pacific Northwest vibe, ya know?

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:38 AM (kuFbc)

570 >> Isn't that the story of the President of France?

Totally different! He was 15 when I met him, not a 14 yr old boy!

Posted by: Brigitte Macron at October 18, 2017 12:39 AM (8O3HH)

571 No no no, eastern WA, good lord.

Scarred me for life, I"m tellin' ya, can't even keep the direction straight!!!!!!!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:39 AM (kuFbc)

572 You sent Susan a smile!
7/23/2017

Susan sent you a smile!
10/10/2017

Me: Hi Susan! Are you looking forward to autumn weather moving in?
10/12/2017

Susan: Hi Brendan! Yes, I am looking forward to the fall. You? Have a great weekend, Susan.
10/14/2017

Me: Yes, very much so. I sleep better and have more energy in cooler weather.
10/14/2017

Susan: Sounds you really love the fall. Hope your week is off to a good start!
10/16/2017



You sent her a smile and she replied THREE months later? Was she in jail or recently liberated from raqqa?

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:39 AM (vuY5x)

573 Yeah, it should have started

You sent Susan a schlong pic!
7/23/2017


Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:37 AM (vuY5x)

LOL how true.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 12:39 AM (Jcg9Q)

574 You sent her a smile and she replied THREE months later? Was she in jail or recently liberated from raqqa?
Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:39 AM (vuY5x)


Chad just broke up with her.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:40 AM (NWiLs)

575 >>>I want kids. Plural. That means I'm stuck with women under 32. Basically 28-32.

Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:36 AM (Tnhbr)



Ah, a man with a plan.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:37 AM (NWiLs)<<<

A man, a plan, a (birth) canal...

Posted by: Panama at October 18, 2017 12:40 AM (E3EdC)

576 Driving in the mountains in the snow and and ice and blizzard conditions is never enjoyable but, the beauty of the mountains more than makes up for that in my opinion.

Posted by: AmericanKestrel at October 18, 2017 12:40 AM (IDhUW)

577 Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:36 AM (Tnhbr

Well, that does change things a bit, but Prince Harry gettin' ready to marry him a 36 year old and he's been vocal about wanting children, so.....

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:40 AM (kuFbc)

578 581 Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:36 AM (Tnhbr

Well, that does change things a bit, but Prince Harry gettin' ready to marry him a 36 year old and he's been vocal about wanting children, so.....
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:40 AM (kuFbc)

He's also FREAKING PRINCE HARRY!!! He's goddamn royalty, he gets what he wants!

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:41 AM (NWiLs)

579 >> Prince Harry gettin' ready to marry him a 36 year

I saw something about that -- the Palace is "looking for a role for her" or something like that.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 12:42 AM (8O3HH)

580 569 Yeah, it should have started . You sent Susan a schlong pic!
7/23/2017
Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:37 AM

Well, you know, not everyone is familiar with all the photo editing features like you. If they haven't mastered the magnification feature the dick pics are out.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 12:42 AM (hscyr)

581 Excuse moi Madame, one year tres grand oui?

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at October 18, 2017 12:42 AM (IfMM+)

582 Houston 4




YANKEES 6!

Championship series tied 2-2.

What are the odds of a Dodgers-Yankees World Series?

Posted by: Fox2! at October 18, 2017 12:43 AM (brIR5)

583 They also have enough money to, discreetly, spend a buttload on fertility treatments.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October




Hey, some air force chick got her husband, a turkey baster, and her sister and put together a plan that worked.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:43 AM (vuY5x)

584 Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:41 AM (Tnhbr)

That's true, and don't even really have to be discreet.

But they need to get on it. 35 is considered elderly in OB.

We were designed to have kids in our teens and 20, not 30s and 40s.

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:43 AM (kuFbc)

585 The House of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha does not have the instinctive dread of birth defects and mental insufficiencies that plague the rest of us.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 12:44 AM (H5rtT)

586 Nobody ever remembers their baster at Christmas.

Posted by: Turkey Basters Rights Movement at October 18, 2017 12:44 AM (eMKNe)

587 582 Well, that does change things a bit, but Prince Harry gettin' ready to marry him a 36 year old and he's been vocal about wanting children, so.....
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:40 AM (kuFbc)
They also have enough money to, discreetly, spend a buttload on fertility treatments.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:41 AM (Tnhbr)

Sounds like you're more interested in a brood mare than a wife with a lifetime commitment.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 12:45 AM (hscyr)

588 Posted by: Fox2! at October 18, 2017 12:43 AM (brIR5)

Who bitch this is?!!

jk!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:45 AM (kuFbc)

589 Welp, looks like I ran off CW, durn it.

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 12:45 AM (eMKNe)

590 Hey, some air force chick got her husband, a turkey baster, and her sister and put together a plan that worked.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:43 AM (vuY5x)

God I hope you have a link for that.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 12:45 AM (Jcg9Q)

591 I hear Trumps Heritage speech was another home run.

Posted by: LASue at October 18, 2017 12:46 AM (hZ+us)

592 Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 12:44 AM (H5rtT)

They sure as hell ought to!

Or was there some sarc there?!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:46 AM (kuFbc)

593 Even turkey basters are getting more action than I am.

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 12:46 AM (eMKNe)

594 Well, you know, not everyone is familiar with all the photo editing features like you. If they haven't mastered the magnification feature the dick pics are out.
Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October



Meh, serious dick pic aficionados know you do not have to worry about size in a dick pic. You never take a side pic, you always take the front-on, like it is staring them down.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:46 AM (vuY5x)

595 I was coming down from Prescott to Phoenix several years ago in a rented Pious. I don't think the engine ran from the time I started until I hit Phoenix. All battery and regenerative braking.

Posted by: Fox2! at October 18, 2017 12:47 AM (brIR5)

596 On the 14 year old the teacher was boning: His mother is dead and his father is in prison.

She's a predator.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 18, 2017 12:47 AM (6FqZa)

597 593 582 Well, that does change things a bit, but Prince Harry gettin' ready to marry him a 36 year old and he's been vocal about wanting children, so.....
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:40 AM (kuFbc)
They also have enough money to, discreetly, spend a buttload on fertility treatments.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:41 AM (Tnhbr)

Sounds like you're more interested in a brood mare than a wife with a lifetime commitment.
Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 12:45 AM (hscyr)

Maybe he's a guy who wants to have a family and you should stop trying to shame him for it.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:47 AM (NWiLs)

598 They also have enough money to, discreetly, spend a buttload on fertility treatments.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:41 AM (Tnhbr)

Sounds like you're more interested in a brood mare than a wife with a lifetime commitment.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 12:45 AM (hscyr)

I didn't see that at all.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 12:47 AM (Jcg9Q)

599 One thing that will come out of the Ellen show tomorrow is that we will get to see what narrative line has been negotiated betwen the casino, the unions, the LVMPD, and the FBI, in other words the Democrats, and what goat they have decided will be scaped to feed their god of power.

Posted by: geoffb at October 18, 2017 12:47 AM (zOpu5)

600 553 Attention everybody... does this online dating exchange means she is interested?

You sent Susan a smile!
7/23/2017

Susan sent you a smile!
10/10/2017

Posted by: Serious Cat

Does xe clearly identify as your chosen target gender? Do xu openly identify as a suitably opposite gender, satisfying xer search of xer's sexually chosen type?

Posted by: Unsure of current dating rules at October 18, 2017 12:47 AM (v9gSJ)

601 602 On the 14 year old the teacher was boning: His mother is dead and his father is in prison.

She's a predator.
Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 18, 2017 12:47 AM (6FqZa)

Good God.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:47 AM (NWiLs)

602 Anyway, I am off to bed... good night, y'all! Thank you for a lovely evening.

And we need another delurking night soon, so all y'all Lurkers start readying yourselves!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:48 AM (kuFbc)

603 Dick pics are a lot of work these days, thanks to Photoshop.

Ya gotta crop the thing, edit out the excess hair, do noticeable yet natural-looking 'enhancement' to the width and length, airbrush that baby to an inch of its life...

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 12:48 AM (eMKNe)

604 590 But they need to get on it. 35 is considered elderly in OB.
We were designed to have kids in our teens and 20, not 30s and 40s.
Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:43 AM (kuFbc)

Except they're not exactly truthful about the downs rate being higher in over 35s. Makes me wonder if the fertility rates drop the way they claim. My irish great grandma keep spitting out kids into her late 50s when she had my grandma, her last baby.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 12:49 AM (hscyr)

605
Meh, serious dick pic aficionados know you do not have to worry about size in a dick pic. You never take a side pic, you always take the front-on, like it is staring them down.
Posted by: yankeefifth


Use CGI

Posted by: Industrial Light and Magique at October 18, 2017 12:49 AM (IqV8l)

606 God I hope you have a link for that.
Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October




Was in the News of the Weird column 23 or more years ago.

Posted by: yankeefifth at October 18, 2017 12:49 AM (vuY5x)

607 >> We were designed to have kids in our teens and 20,
>> not 30s and 40s.

You know, something that surprised me is that teenaged pregnancies are actually a bit higher risk. Early 20s is probably the optimum.

In the 19 and younger cohort there are higher risks for the mother (preeclampsia and anemia, etc), as well as higher risk for the baby.

I didn't know that.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 12:49 AM (8O3HH)

608 While I agree that it shouldn't be in the Olympics, I will admit that at this level it's not much different from some of the other gymnastics-type or synchronized swimming events.



https://youtu.be/waIuhfoTMv8


Marginally SFW, depending on where you work.
Posted by: Country Singer

So are all the pole dancin' olympians going to have porn names?

And speaking of names, they'll have to come up with a new name for the event, because you know Bob Costas won't be able to resist making "pole" jokes.

Posted by: Average Guy at October 18, 2017 12:50 AM (LMcFk)

609 Serious Cat,
She could be shy. Try some humor maybe like y5 at 527 but not so negative and then ask her out, she could only say no.

Posted by: AmericanKestrel at October 18, 2017 12:50 AM (IDhUW)

610 @598 Saxe-Coburg sarc:
http://tinyurl.com/ycpcrozp

I don't know why a guy who can hand-forge skull necklaces and iron roses would be lonesome in this world. Chicks dig that.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 12:50 AM (H5rtT)

611 591 The House of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha does not have the instinctive dread of birth defects and mental insufficiencies that plague the rest of us.
Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 12:44 AM (H5rtT)

The current generation sure seems to be branching out into non-inbreed territory.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 12:50 AM (hscyr)

612 Grammy Winger ~ I assume you are still up. Just wanted to say sorry about the Cubbies ~ stayed up late myself and kept the faith. But t'was not to be

Back at `em tomorrow.

Posted by: Publius Redux at October 18, 2017 12:51 AM (UOr6C)

613 Dick pics are a lot of work these days, thanks to Photoshop.

Ya gotta crop the thing, edit out the excess hair, do noticeable yet natural-looking 'enhancement' to the width and length, airbrush that baby to an inch of its life...

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 12:48 AM (eMKNe)

Hmmm, I don't remember doing any of that. Just click and send.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 12:51 AM (Jcg9Q)

614 From the unironic "good news" department:

ICYMI: Hockey Player Who Protests Anthem Gets Invited to Tampa Police Department...Here's What Happened
(link to Townhall)

https://tinyurl.com/ycxfwkt3

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 12:52 AM (eMKNe)

615 Serious Cat,
She could be shy. Try some humor maybe like y5 at 527 but not so negative and then ask her out, she could only say no.

Posted by: AmericanKestrel at October 18, 2017 12:50 AM (IDhUW)

Hold on, we need to know a lot more about this chick before we can start in with our cheeky humor and sage advice.

Age? Difference?

Location?

Kids already?

What does she want?

Show us the goods Cat.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 12:53 AM (Jcg9Q)

616
Yeah, you probably should talk to the gay and ladyboy porn people for pointers on proper dick pic techniques.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 12:53 AM (8O3HH)

617 Country Boy, and how successful were you with your quick-and-dirty DP? ;-)

It's only a matter of time before someone starts up a photo studio that specializes in dick pics... :-P

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 12:54 AM (eMKNe)

618 620 Go fuck yourself. I'm interested in a family as well as a lifelong marriage, and I've seen friends nearly ruin their marriages trying to have kids in their late thirties.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:51 AM (Tnhbr)

Gee insomniac, he doesn't sound shamed to me which was actually YOUR interpretation. Perhaps you would like to weigh in on the appropriateness of telling me to go fuck myself?

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 12:54 AM (hscyr)

619 Posted by: Fox2! at October 18, 2017 12:43 AM (brIR5)

To answer your question Fox2! ~ the odds of a Yankees Dodgers series got a whole lot better this eve after my Yanks took care of business at home. But sorry to see the Cubbie lose ~ Would love a Yankees Dodgers works series ~ but would love a Yankees Cubs series even more!!! Last time they saw each other in the WS was 1932!

Posted by: Publius Redux at October 18, 2017 12:55 AM (UOr6C)

620 So, Miss News of The Weird from 23 years ago is now what we'd call...
Fair Game.

"I'd like to take you home to meet my dad, Oxo Good-Grips."

Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 12:55 AM (H5rtT)

621 626 620 Go fuck yourself. I'm interested in a family as well as a lifelong marriage, and I've seen friends nearly ruin their marriages trying to have kids in their late thirties.
Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at October 18, 2017 12:51 AM (Tnhbr)

Gee insomniac, he doesn't sound shamed to me which was actually YOUR interpretation. Perhaps you would like to weigh in on the appropriateness of telling me to go fuck myself?
Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 12:54 AM (hscyr)

You were trying to shame him. Stow your passive aggressive garbage. You have a really ugly soul and it shows clearly right here.

Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:56 AM (NWiLs)

622 Country Boy, and how successful were you with your quick-and-dirty DP? ;-)

It's only a matter of time before someone starts up a photo studio that specializes in dick pics... :-P

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 12:54 AM (eMKNe)

I don't recall it getting me anywhere, but then again it was sent to the Widow Cray Cray, who had no intent of doing anything but fucking with my head anyways.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 12:57 AM (Jcg9Q)

623 Susan sounds like a robot


Sorry Brendan. She could still be great.

Posted by: LASue at October 18, 2017 12:58 AM (hZ+us)

624 Country Boy, so it was of the genre 'angry dick pic.' Fair enough. :-)

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 12:58 AM (eMKNe)

625 The current generation sure seems to be branching out into non-inbreed territory.

And yet you don't call them brood-mares. Broad-minded of you.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 12:58 AM (H5rtT)

626 Oh yeah. She wants the D from you, good and hard.
Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 17, 2017 11:41 PM (NWiLs)

"D"? As in "D"ropping autumn leaves?
Posted by: Serious Cat at October 17, 2017 11:53 PM (HaZvX)

Carbon in its face centered cubic crystal structure.

Posted by: Fox2! at October 18, 2017 12:58 AM (brIR5)

627 629 You were trying to shame him. Stow your passive aggressive garbage. You have a really ugly soul and it shows clearly right here.
Posted by: Insomniac - Redneck Death Squad Ninja at October 18, 2017 12:56 AM (NWiLs)

Nope. But it sure is interesting this is the standard default.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 01:00 AM (hscyr)

628
Prince Harry's likely bride is Meghan Markle, who is 'Murican. And divorced. That would've been a big no-no, but they say the Church of England has okayed it.

The rumor is the marriage will be announced in December.

You know, the royals had disasters with "proper marriages", and QE is said to have learned some lessons from that. I like Kate, and I like the grandyoung 'uns better than the children. By a long shot.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 01:01 AM (8O3HH)

629 633 The current generation sure seems to be branching out into non-inbreed territory.
And yet you don't call them brood-mares. Broad-minded of you.
Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 12:58 AM (H5rtT)

Well, I haven't seen anything about Harry going along with her having the official virginity inspection for Meghan like Charles did with Diana. Prince William either. so, apples and oranges.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 01:02 AM (hscyr)

630 Colorado Alex,
Seems to me that the info that you are looking for a wife and want children would be bait for the "right" kind of women on the dating sites. When my single friends bumped up against the big 3-0, they got a lot more serious and urgent about finding Mr Right or Mr. Close Enough. Get out there and don't give up. Blacksmithing sounds interesting, and interesting is attractive.

Posted by: Just wondering at October 18, 2017 01:03 AM (WBYpW)

631 Country Boy, so it was of the genre 'angry dick pic.' Fair enough. :-)

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 12:58 AM (eMKNe)

No, it was just a spur of the moment silliness. That was long before I found out the truth about her.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 01:03 AM (Jcg9Q)

632 >> Harry going along with her having the official
>> virginity inspection

From I've read, the Church of England has okayed Harry marrying a divorcee.

Rumor is the proposal and acceptance has already been made, and their preparing for her and all that, and the official annoucement will be in December.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 01:05 AM (8O3HH)

633 Jeeze, Country Boy, maybe she wasn't insane until she saw that picture.

Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 01:05 AM (H5rtT)

634 Bebe's, the brood mare comment sounded like something from a third-waver, frankly. And yeah, you were trying to shame him and no, you didn't succeed.

Although I wouldn't tell you to fuck yourself, since we're in Ace's living room.

Care to step outside?

Posted by: Miley, the Duchess - call me! Only $7.99/minute! at October 18, 2017 01:05 AM (bjlHK)

635 Huge difference. You're a woman. It's easy.


Same basic principle. Just keep lowering your standards until you don't have to any more.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at October 18, 2017 01:06 AM (gIRsn)

636 Jeeze, Country Boy, maybe she wasn't insane until she saw that picture.


Posted by: Stringer Davis at October 18, 2017 01:05 AM (H5rtT)

Lol. I sent the pic in 2013. She was already insane, since she was already fucking with me. Unfortunately it wasn't until last November that I discovered the truth.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 01:07 AM (Jcg9Q)

637 451 Gonna be a damned shame when he's found dead with a bullet hole in him and no bullet.

Posted by: Democrats


I have two words for you -- dry ice slugs.

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 18, 2017 01:07 AM (0ogQG)

638 I have two words for you -- dry ice slugs.


Posted by: GnuBreed at October 18, 2017 01:07 AM (0ogQG)

Frozen leg of lamb.

Posted by: Miley, the Duchess - call me! Only $7.99/minute! at October 18, 2017 01:08 AM (bjlHK)

639 Bebe's, the brood mare comment sounded like something from a third-waver, frankly. And yeah, you were trying to shame him and no, you didn't succeed.

Although I wouldn't tell you to fuck yourself, since we're in Ace's living room.

Care to step outside?


Posted by: Miley, the Duchess - call me! Only $7.99/minute! at October 18, 2017 01:05 AM (bjlHK)

Quick, somebody go get a kiddie pool, and I'll round up the jello.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 01:08 AM (Jcg9Q)

640 526 just wondering

Thanks for the update, sorry things aren't better for her (yet).

R'fuah shleima.

May she find a path to healing.

Posted by: ibguy at October 18, 2017 01:09 AM (vUcdz)

641 Science Daily was flooding the zone on those neutron stars that smashed together 130 million light years ago/away.

We heard it first, through gravity waves; and then we saw a gamma ray burst, and then we found it. Pretty awesome stuff. Nails down a lot of theory that hadn't been observed until now - like, oh, alchemy. The creation of gold in space

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 18, 2017 01:09 AM (6FqZa)

642 Quick, somebody go get a kiddie pool, and I'll round up the jello.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 01:08 AM (Jcg9Q)

At the HQ? It's gotta be pudding.

Posted by: Miley, the Duchess - call me! Only $7.99/minute! at October 18, 2017 01:10 AM (bjlHK)

643 639 Care to step outside?
Posted by: Miley, the Duchess - call me! Only $7.99/minute! at October 18, 2017 01:05 AM (bjlHK)
Quick, somebody go get a kiddie pool, and I'll round up the jello.

Sure, as long as we're selling pay per view. country boy gets a cut for supplying the jello.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 01:10 AM (hscyr)

644 >> somebody go get a kiddie pool, and I'll round up
>> the jello.

Dammit, I'm just no going to get a break this week, am I?

Somebody please get me out of here!

Posted by: publius' Ficus at October 18, 2017 01:12 AM (8O3HH)

645 qdpsteve, if you're still here...

No, I haven't recorded the bit yet. Play rehearsals and other work stuff have cut into my studio time.

I'll give it another shot.

For now...I'm off to bed. Later, y'all.

Posted by: Captain Friendzone, uh, Whitebread at October 18, 2017 01:12 AM (rJUlF)

646 642 At the HQ? It's gotta be pudding.
Posted by: Miley, the Duchess - call me! Only $7.99/minute! at October 18, 2017 01:10 AM (bjlHK)

Nope, chocolate stains.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 01:13 AM (hscyr)

647 CW, no rush. I'd like to hear it but do it when you're ready. Thanks for the update. I'm just flattered you have an interest. :-)

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 01:13 AM (eMKNe)

648 >> We heard it first, through gravity waves; and then
>> we saw a gamma ray burst, and then we found it

The physics part of me loves that as much as another parts loves the jello and pudding wrestling.

But, if I had to choose, guess which one I'd go with. I ought to be ashamed.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 01:14 AM (8O3HH)

649 And CW, be thankful for that friendzone, at least.

As I've shared before, I'm Captain Restraining Order. :-P

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 01:14 AM (eMKNe)

650 I got the GoPro. Okay bebe's and insomniac, we're ready! ;-)

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 01:14 AM (eMKNe)

651
Besides other things, this is the first empirical direct confirmation that the "speed of gravity" is the same as c, the speed of light. Which General Relativity (and even more basic principles) demand.

This had to be, but direct observation is always nice. I've argued with a lot of woo-woos back in the day about the speed of gravity, and this was a little hitch, lack of experimental confirmation. But this is it.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 01:16 AM (8O3HH)

652 Vanilla.

Posted by: Miley, the Duchess - call me! Only $7.99/minute! at October 18, 2017 01:19 AM (bjlHK)

653 Care to step outside?
Posted by: Miley, the Duchess - call me! Only $7.99/minute! at October 18, 2017 01:05 AM (bjlHK)
Quick, somebody go get a kiddie pool, and I'll round up the jello.

Sure, as long as we're selling pay per view. country boy gets a cut for supplying the jello.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 01:10 AM (hscyr)

You can keep the money, I just wanna watch.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 01:19 AM (Jcg9Q)

654 Pedant publius is going to chime in about "gravity waves". As you know, the really geeky physics knowledge is what just reels in the babes.....

"Gravity waves" technically refers to the water wave phenomenon.

"Gravitational waves" are what we're talking here. Or better, "gravitational radiation".

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 01:20 AM (8O3HH)

655 Care to step outside?
Posted by: Miley, the Duchess - call me! Only $7.99/minute! at October 18, 2017 01:05 AM (bjlHK)
Quick, somebody go get a kiddie pool, and I'll round up the jello.

Sure, as long as we're selling pay per view. country boy gets a cut for supplying the jello.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 01:10 AM (hscyr)

You can keep the money, I just wanna watch.
Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 01:19 AM (Jcg9Q)

Maybe I'm not THAT sleepy.

Posted by: Captain Friendzone, uh, Whitebread at October 18, 2017 01:21 AM (rJUlF)

656 >> we're ready! ;-)

Lotion! Don't forget the lotion. Dammit, where is it? Shit.....

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 01:21 AM (8O3HH)

657 >>>Maybe I'm not THAT sleepy.

Well I am. I just stepped in to do honey badger duty.

Colorado Alex, Molyneux had an excellent video on honest dating for men, and finding women of integrity.

Posted by: Miley, the Duchess - call me! Only $7.99/minute! at October 18, 2017 01:24 AM (bjlHK)

658 You know, popping in to the AOSHQ every 200 comments or so can be kind of fun. Like watching an organism mutate before your eyes.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at October 18, 2017 01:25 AM (rb1zT)

659 >> Like watching an organism mutate before your eyes.


That's hot.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 01:26 AM (8O3HH)

660 656 >> we're ready! ;-)
Lotion! Don't forget the lotion. Dammit, where is it? Shit.....
Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 01:21 AM (8O3HH)

Wouldn't that work against the jello? Kind of like oil and water?

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 01:26 AM (hscyr)

661 wouldn't mind retiring in the Phoenix area. I hate winter more and
more. Not crazy about snakes and scorpions and big spiders though.
still preferable to ice and snow.


Cave Creek gets a dusting of snow most winters, but I've never heard of them needing to plow the roads. Might be a good place so you don't forget why you left the cold weather behind.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at October 18, 2017 01:28 AM (IcT7t)

662 >> Wouldn't that work against the jello? Kind of like oil
>> and water?

Well, the lotion was for me, and the jello for ya'll. Initially, at least.

But I'll make sure to get the water-based, edible kind of lotion. That's should mix with Jello just fine.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 01:28 AM (8O3HH)

663 Hi, Ovi! Hey, Kuznetsov!

How's that ass taste? Does it taste like a shutout, you perpetual f*cking Communist shitbag losers?

Posted by: f*ck the Washington Capitals at October 18, 2017 01:30 AM (EzDbi)

664 Well I've met bebe's and seen a pic of Miley, so combine those with jello and I think it's, shall we say, time to call it a night IYKWIMAITYD.

Nite all.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM survivor at October 18, 2017 01:35 AM (Jcg9Q)

665 Post of

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine. All Honor & Glory to Kekistan! at October 18, 2017 01:39 AM (fA1SL)

666 >> How's that ass taste?

Like chicken.

Posted by: Allison Williams' Boyfriend at October 18, 2017 01:40 AM (8O3HH)

667 The beast

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine. All Honor & Glory to Kekistan! at October 18, 2017 01:40 AM (fA1SL)

668 Only if the Beast is chicken.

Hi Uncle! No spankings tonight, I'm off to bed.

Posted by: Miley, the Duchess - call me! Only $7.99/minute! at October 18, 2017 01:43 AM (bjlHK)

669 G'Night, Miley.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) Baseball Nut at October 18, 2017 01:45 AM (Ckg4U)

670 Goodnight all, thanks for the chat tonight.

Posted by: qdpsteve at October 18, 2017 01:47 AM (eMKNe)

671 G'Night, qdpsteve.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) Baseball Nut at October 18, 2017 01:47 AM (Ckg4U)

672 Two nights ago, I saw my first-ever drone hovering over the streets of New York: at Houston St. and Lafayette St., spying into the Puck Building. It was a big one, too: looked to be 2-3 feet across. The Puck Building, btw, is owned by Jared Kushner.

At first I thought it was a helicopter station-keeping over a spot downtown (a common sight, usually police helos), but then it moved and darted with the quickness of a dragonfly; then it came around in front of the building and its true scale was clear. A very peculiar sensation came over me: I felt like I was seeing the preview of some feature of a dystopian future when these damn things will be dispatched to spy on all of us.

Wonder if BB guns are illegal in NYC? (probably)

Posted by: Beverly at October 18, 2017 01:49 AM (yG+Ft)

673 Inso my brother I'm telling you the women and the life you want are not here (AOS)
Gents if you want kids or a wonderful new mate you better get on the ball and start making a plan and setting it in motion and coming here as a distraction not a main course.
Sure worked for me this place will be here when you come back to announce your latest victory

Posted by: MAxIE at October 18, 2017 01:49 AM (9TR2V)

674 Going to bed. G'Night, Everyone.

*static*

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) Baseball Nut at October 18, 2017 01:50 AM (Ckg4U)

675 The pizza place in Idaho Springs is Beau Joes. Pretty damn good pizza

Posted by: Old Blue at October 18, 2017 01:52 AM (gEvQ8)

676

Susan sent you a pic of her tits! And dick!
10/17/17

Uhh-ooo...

Posted by: Ricky Retardo at October 18, 2017 01:53 AM (qul7b)

677 *settles in*

Ah, the lost joys of watching the test pattern.

You young'uns who think we always had the comments in color, hah!, let me tell you...

Posted by: Bandersnatch at October 18, 2017 01:53 AM (gIRsn)

678 Wonder if BB guns are illegal in NYC? (probably)

Can't even have a paintball marker in that town. You'll need to come up with a handheld microwave emitter to cook drone circuits.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at October 18, 2017 01:53 AM (IcT7t)

679 Publius, I've seen the optical evidence and have heard of the gravitational wave evidence. Two neutron stars colliding is incredible. The sheer amount of energy released is unimaginable.

Posted by: Old Blue at October 18, 2017 01:57 AM (gEvQ8)

680 Can't even have a paintball marker in that town.
You'll need to come up with a handheld microwave emitter to cook drone
circuits.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at October 18, 2017 01:53 AM (IcT7t)
---

or a really good sling shot...

maybe a net thrower, but i'm thinking on most of those buildings, the windows don't open.

Posted by: redc1c4 at October 18, 2017 02:01 AM (l5E9o)

681 Puddles Pityparty is legitimately a terrific singer. Don't let the clown costume discourage you giving him a listen!

Posted by: Prothonotary Warbler at October 18, 2017 02:02 AM (3YxFh)

682 >> The sheer amount of energy released is
>> unimaginable.

Yes, indeed. IIRC, the most energetic event in the universe (known or conceived so far) is two black holes merging. The energy of the gravitational radiation release by itself (and that's about the only thing, unless there is something else nearby) is that of several solar masses of matter being converted energy in a second.

If you were close enough, the tidal forces of the gravitational wave would be enough to rip you apart.

Black hole (and neutron stars) merges are something else. There is an asymmetry of the thing (and this gets into some heavy General Relativty -- no romper room 'rithmetic for sure). The center of mass gets a "kick" from the gravitational radiation.

After the merger, the pre-merger center of mass goes flying off in direction, kicking against the non-spherical gravitational radiation "kick" (radiation reaction, as it's dubbed).

That is very non-Newtonian, to say the least.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at October 18, 2017 02:05 AM (8O3HH)

683 197
If a 1000-gram drone copter toy can cause significant damage to a commercial airliner, we're in big, big trouble.
Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at October 17, 2017 10:40 PM (SDW4a)

Golden BB, right?
Posted by: Kindltot at October 17, 2017 10:41 PM (ywxMx)

1. Getting sucked into an engine
2. Smashing a cockpit windshield
3. Damaging the rudder or flaps
4. Puncturing the fuselage and causing massive decompression

Just for starters . . .

Posted by: The Man from Athens at October 18, 2017 02:07 AM (QMwOT)

684 that convertible couch/bunk bed ("not sure if this is ace's next project") is absolutely brilliant. genius.

Posted by: musical jolly chimp at October 18, 2017 02:10 AM (AxFdW)

685 Yes, indeed. IIRC, the most energetic event in the universe (known or conceived so far) is two black holes merging.

Kathy Griffin and Lena Dunham, stuck together at the vajayjay by suction...

Posted by: Ricky Retardo at October 18, 2017 02:14 AM (qul7b)

686 Sound of Social Justice:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cruRyoo2xiE

Posted by: fizz at October 18, 2017 02:15 AM (GX56c)

687 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1iAYhQsQhSY

For when you just need a drink....

Posted by: tcn in AK at October 18, 2017 02:27 AM (NXsWM)

688 Old Blue,
How was the eclipse?

Posted by: AmericanKestrel at October 18, 2017 02:31 AM (IDhUW)

689 This article on inertia (settled science, yes?) is fascinating, if a bit over my head. Oh, and it has a great story about a guy that bought a decommissioned ICBM for $900 to boot:

americanscientist.org/article/the-forgotten-mystery-of-inertia

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 18, 2017 02:31 AM (0ogQG)

690 Waylaid by Puddles on Utube. Well worth it.

Posted by: socalcon at October 18, 2017 02:45 AM (WAnre)

691 I love those.
Could see them from my in laws house.
Miss going to Mesa in teh winter.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 18, 2017 12:19 AM (4bU2r)

If I walk out to the street here, and face East, I am looking right at Superstition Mountain, from about 6 miles away.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 18, 2017 02:45 AM (O848g)

692 hey Alex: now that you're not going to school all day every day, we going to go shooting, in between all your w*rk travel and your ticking clock?


Posted by: redc1c4 at October 18, 2017 02:50 AM (l5E9o)

693 Payson, Flagstaff, Hebert Ovvergard are all nice areas. Not so damn hot in the summer and 4 seasosn.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at October 18, 2017 12:31 AM (4bU2r)

But snow in winter; sometimes lots of it. Down here in the Valley, won't be none. A few, very few frosty mornings is all. Which is very comforting for us snowbirds.

I have yet to see a scorpion or rattlesnake on my property. Lizards, doves, quail, desert rats, Yes. And I have heard coyotes, which I also hear and see at home. Saw a little brown bat tonight.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 18, 2017 02:53 AM (O848g)

694 689 This article on inertia (settled science, yes?) is fascinating, if a bit over my head. Oh, and it has a great story about a guy that bought a decommissioned ICBM for $900 to boot:

americanscientist.org/article/the-forgotten-mystery-of-inertia
Posted by: GnuBreed at October 18, 2017 02:31 AM (0ogQG)

I read that and could not help but think of Shakespere when the author was explaining how the various theories could not account for certain things: "There is more in heaven and earth than is dreamt of in your philosophy."

One of the horrors of the modern age is the inability of people to admit ignorance. Ignorance is great. Having some small grasp on how little you know is the path to knowledge.

It also reminds me of the story of the three sages and the elephant. Some things are too vast for us to easily recognize and quantify with our current abilities. That does not mean we should not- just that we should never be too sure of anything we think we 'know'.

This of course also leads into the global warming thing: I do not doubt we have some effect on the climate, but trying to understand how, when there are millions of processes and counter processes here- all operating in an open system with outside inputs- is somewhat foolish given our knowledge. It really is the "The sun rises because I urinate in the morning."

Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at October 18, 2017 02:57 AM (rb1zT)

695 No no no, eastern WA, good lord.

Scarred me for life, I"m tellin' ya, can't even keep the direction straight!!!!!!!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at October 18, 2017 12:39 AM (kuFbc)

That is the Palouse district. It is picture-postcard beautiful. Rolling hills, amber waves of grain, little red-brick towns with the Stars and Stripes flying from the Post Office.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 18, 2017 02:59 AM (O848g)

696 Except they're not exactly truthful about the downs rate being higher in over 35s. Makes me wonder if the fertility rates drop the way they claim. My irish great grandma keep spitting out kids into her late 50s when she had my grandma, her last baby.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 18, 2017 12:49 AM (hscyr)

As long as a woman hasn't hit menopause, she is able to have a child.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 18, 2017 03:05 AM (O848g)

697 >>>156 when an Aussie and I toasted the Queen Mother after her passing.

Posted by: Vendette at October 17, 2017 10:32 PM (nXoiZ)

How'd you get ahold of the body?
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 17, 2017 10:33 PM (8gDQu)

Bravo.

Posted by: m at October 18, 2017 03:10 AM (1Xpas)

698 That is the Palouse district. It is picture-postcard beautiful. Rolling hills, amber waves of grain, little red-brick towns with the Stars and Stripes flying from the Post Office.

I live on the edge of it, Lewiston. The Palouse really is that beautiful.

Posted by: Ricky Retardo at October 18, 2017 03:12 AM (qul7b)

699 how could anyone ever get lost in Eastern Washington?

the winds will tell you where you are, because Yakima Training Center sucks 13 months out of the year.

true story: i transferred to a different unit here in #Failifornia, just to avoid going there for a summer AT.

not that it would be any worse than Planet Irwin, but because i knew at least 2 lifers in my unit, one an FFT, had the knives out for me, and i was going to be stuck running the Troop LOGPACs.

running LOGPACS was easy, except for the hours, but there were too many ways for them to double screw me, by giving me all the responsibility, but no authority, and by changing documents, or using verbal orders they would later deny, to make it look like i either screwed up or deliberately sabotaged things.

so i bailed, they went to YTC, and i did a home station AT that year. it really does NOT pay to mess with the SP4 mafia, especially the veteranos.

Posted by: redc1c4 at October 18, 2017 03:25 AM (l5E9o)

700 694 Posted by: Aetius451AD Work Laptop at October 18, 2017 02:57 AM (rb1zT)

This is a really good comment. Let me add to it:

I once heard a story about physicist Robert Oppenheimer, who was lecturing on quantum theory during its inception. He was asked by an interviewer, "I hear there's only three people (Oppenheimer and Einstein being two of them) who understand quantum mechanics." Oppenheimer replied, "Who's the third?"

johnpiippo.com/2011/10/quantum-mechanics-cat-in-hat.html

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 18, 2017 03:32 AM (0ogQG)

701 Tonic? Gin & vodka! *hic*

Posted by: Distillery Hillary at October 18, 2017 03:35 AM (bc2Lc)

702 When you stop inquiring, you start dying.

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 18, 2017 03:36 AM (0ogQG)

703 so i bailed, they went to YTC, and i did a home station AT that year. it really does NOT pay to mess with the SP4 mafia, especially the veteranos.

Posted by: redc1c4 at October 18, 2017 03:25 AM (l5E9o)

I think that's written in English, but I do not comprehend it. LOL.

Yakima is east of the Cascade mountains, but it is really Central Washington, darn near dead center, IIRC. The Palouse country all lies to the east of U.S. 395, the highway that runs from Ritzville to the Tri-Cities.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM at October 18, 2017 03:36 AM (O848g)

704 Willie Nelson . . . I had a client who worked for our town's soccer stadium. Several years ago, Farm Aid was held there and she ordered a tray of cookies to share with her co-workers in the ticket office that weekend. I delivered the cookies to her, and later she showed them to one of Willie's people. The woman was so pleased she asked to show them to Willie. The ended up on his bus, my client was super excited. They never made it back to my client, but I got a nice thank you a few days later from Willie's office. Wonderful . . . I was walking on air . . . until I realized that my client (my husband's friend of many years) was out a tray of cookies. Rats. Now I had to work another order into my schedule . . . at no extra charge. Plus I was out a $6 tray that I had originally asked to get back. Needless to say, I'll never send cookies to Willie again.

Posted by: NavyMom at October 18, 2017 03:38 AM (Oelm8)

705 Einstein's version was "Once you stop learning, you start dying."

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 18, 2017 03:39 AM (0ogQG)

706 I think that's written in English, but I do not comprehend it. LOL.

---
it's written in fluent US Army from back around the turn of this century.

gawd knows WHAT terms they use now...

Posted by: redc1c4 at October 18, 2017 03:44 AM (l5E9o)

707 Thanks for the ONT.

I typed this up for another forum, figured the horde would appreciate, given the Moby visits today.


-TPP dead.
-Paris Accord abandoned.
-NAFTA hanging by a thread.
-Dangerous Iran nuclear treaty boondoggle in jeopardy.
-Gorsuch, etc.
-Serial USSC victories on so-called "Muslim ban."
-DOW, record of records.
-GDP growth encouraging.
-ISIS capital has fallen.
-Iraqis retake Mosul with coalition support.
-MOAB.
-Sane ROE restored.
-UN agreements, including historic unanimous agreement on NK.
-DOJ pedophile sweeps and ICE actions apace.
-Sanctuary jurisdictions under assault.
-Obamacare individual mandate not being enforced, insurance company slush fund in danger, and obamacare on the ropes to the point that dems are working with lying GOPe, who never intended a repeal. Working together.
-Wall prototypes being reviewed, and IIRC, house passed $10B in border security spending.
-EPA sue and settle dead.
-CA governor moonbeam agreeing with Devos on Title IX reforms.
-Harveywood's war on women (and possibly soon, on children) under seige.
-DNC is near bankrupt.
-The Left is turning on each other and eating their own. People on the left openly calling for hillary and pelosi to be put out to pasture.
-NFL on the ropes.
-Fake news' propaganda stranglehold on the American conscience virtually eliminated.
-Masks ripped off enemies of the American people left and right.
-And on and on.

Nine months.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at October 18, 2017 03:45 AM (tbOMB)

708

A Day Without Alcohol Is A Day Without Alcohol.

*Hic*

Posted by: Hitlery Cliton at October 18, 2017 03:48 AM (qul7b)

709 that than (Jeter overlay), 'tis a spelling bee, I guess.
God bless.

Posted by: micky at October 18, 2017 03:52 AM (dF9Lb)

710 Nine months.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at October 18, 2017 03:45 AM (tbOMB)

---

see?

SEE?

i *told* you stupid racists that voting for Drumpf was a waste of time. if only we had elected Jeb, or even Kasich, but not you morons.

and you call yourselves "conservatives"

HAH!

Posted by: redc1c4 at October 18, 2017 04:08 AM (l5E9o)

711

*Two Weeks*

Posted by: Pixy at October 18, 2017 04:16 AM (qul7b)

712
four hours to daylight

Posted by: Reginald Chaulkwhite at October 18, 2017 04:16 AM (m9X4Y)

713 Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at October 18, 2017 03:45 AM (tbOMB)

Possible addition to list:
Labor Participation Rate flat-lines after almost two decades of steady decline.

A nice tax cut could have it on the up-tick, but uniparty doesn't give a shit.

Posted by: Slippery Slope Salesman at October 18, 2017 04:28 AM (EgwCt)

714 707 Nine months.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner


That's not a bad preezyship, right there. #stillnottiredofwinning

And for the #nevertrumpers out there, contemplate that list and guess how many of them would have occurred under preezy Clinton.

Exactly NONE of them. Yeah, he's crude lewd and not well spoken. But at some point, you hafta look at deeds, not words. We've heard oceans of well spoken words.

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 18, 2017 04:49 AM (0ogQG)

715 Exactly NONE of them. Yeah, he's crude lewd and not well spoken. But at some point, you hafta look at deeds, not words. We've heard oceans of well spoken words.

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 18, 2017 04:49 AM (0ogQG)


========

Once you become aware of all the rhetorical gimmicks the left uses, they aren't well spoken either. Everything they say causes an eyeroll.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at October 18, 2017 05:20 AM (/qEW2)

Posted by: Vic We Have No Party at October 18, 2017 05:26 AM (mpXpK)

717 I'm focusing on the NRA now because we need to keep guns out of the hands of angry actresses!

Posted by: Harvey the Dinosaur at October 18, 2017 05:29 AM (Ndje9)

718 G'morning, all.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at October 18, 2017 05:59 AM (EyPfd)

719
You sent Susan a smile!
7/23/2017

Posted by: Serious Cat at October 17, 2017 11:36 PM


Shoulda sent her a mini cupcake. They have remarkable powers to bring the crazy to the surface, I hear.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at October 18, 2017 06:00 AM (pNxlR)

720 flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner

Thank you for that list. Lots of good stuff there.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at October 18, 2017 06:21 AM (hyuyC)

721 Good morning!

Let's smile and be happy and strike fear in the heart of killjoy leftists everywhere.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at October 18, 2017 06:21 AM (hyuyC)

722 Los Doyers !!! Yay. Can you hand me that broom, please ?

Posted by: Astute Dude at October 18, 2017 06:40 AM (VWjLE)

723 STOP THE HAMMERING!

Posted by: NBC has a new motto at October 18, 2017 06:40 AM (uLWyW)

724 A joke...

A young virgin falls in love with a gentleman of a certain ethnicity which was rumoured to have strong predilection for buggery, and though her family and friends attempted to dissuade her, she married him anyway...

After a month or so into the marriage, some inquired of her as to if he'd yet attempted to claim the "other hole"... She'd replied, "Oh, not all! He says that if we did that, I might get pregnant and we just simply cannot afford to start a family yet."


Posted by: Zettai Ryoiki at October 17, 2017
11:23 PM (e9G8E)


In 1923, a woman named Marguerite Fahmy was acquitted of shooting her husband, an Egyptian playboy. The defense was that Fahmy insisted on anal sex and the "unnaturalness" of it drove her to kill him.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at October 18, 2017 06:43 AM (X6fMO)

725 Morning, morons.

I saw a drone hovering over the expressway on my commute home last night, first time I've ever seen one IRL. It is a little creepy.

Posted by: Gem at October 18, 2017 06:46 AM (XoAz8)

726 Anal sex stories before my second cup of coffee. It's going to be a fantastic day, I can feel it.

Posted by: Barack Obama is a bad, bad man at October 18, 2017 06:48 AM (uLWyW)

727

*hic*

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at October 18, 2017 06:48 AM (0mskG)

728 If drones start to bother you, this little kit device might help.

http://preview.tinyurl.com/yc8fwmqs

Posted by: Barack Obama is a bad, bad man at October 18, 2017 06:51 AM (uLWyW)

729 My husband works for a distillery. We appreciate good tonic as much as the good gin we are now drinking. Ground to glass gin. Company grows its own barley, harvests it with real honest to God horsepower.

Posted by: Sue at October 18, 2017 06:55 AM (+ZK/F)

730 The Triggered by Mini-Cupcakes chick's Twitter feed is depressing. These people actually crow and strut like little brownshirted peacocks over their successful cyberbullying.

And if you disagree with her Blue Checkmark Mafia tactics, you're a triggered manbaby.

Posted by: WhatWhatWhat? at October 18, 2017 06:58 AM (ul9CR)

731 Morning all

Posted by: rickb223 at October 18, 2017 07:00 AM (ksPsw)

732 Yikes. Just running to the store for some eggs and covfefe and I checked the temp-50 chilly degrees. I'm wearing shorts anyway.

Posted by: WhatWhatWhat? at October 18, 2017 07:02 AM (ul9CR)

733 What the hell happened here?? Why is there Jello all over everything???

Posted by: AOS janitor at October 18, 2017 07:07 AM (UdKB7)

734 " when there are millions of processes and counter
processes here- all operating in an open system with outside inputs- is
somewhat foolish given our knowledge. It really is the "The sun rises
because I urinate in the morning."
Posted by: Aetius451AD

If a clever guy had a grant, he could prove how the color of his morning urine directly impacts snowfall in the Arctic. He'd only need a few variables (charting beer intake, Cubs baseball record that year, AoS comment numbers, and Pacific earthquakes, whatever, and the recorded snow) ... and by choosing the correct time frames and preferred aspects of those statistics ... a smart "scientist" could prove any one of those factors as The Cause. (or so I'm told)

Posted by: illiniwek at October 18, 2017 07:11 AM (/aIFg)

735 We want the morning report!

When do we want it?

NOW!!

Posted by: Kreplach at October 18, 2017 07:15 AM (Wtll+)

736 735 We want the morning report!

When do we want it?

NOW!!
Posted by: Kreplach at October 18, 2017 07:15 AM

#MeToo

Posted by: KWDreaming at October 18, 2017 07:30 AM (S6xeB)

737 Le NOOD

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at October 18, 2017 07:40 AM (EyPfd)

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