42°21'20.43"N, 10°55'48.66"E

Five are dead. Fifteen are still missing.

Ship's captain: "We were about 300 meters from the shore, more or less."

You know what else was 300 meters from the shore? A huge rock. See for yourself. Paste the above coordinates into the Google Earth search field or choose "satellite view" in Google Maps. In Google Earth, you can click on the "show ruler" icon (looks like a ruler); select meters, and measure from the nearest shore. 300 meters.

Captain Schettino is a real piece of work:

Meanwhile, attention focused on the captain, who was spotted by Coast Guard officials and passengers fleeing the scene even as the chaotic and terrifying evacuation was under way.
. . .
A French couple who boarded the Concordia in Marseille, Ophelie Gondelle and David Du Pays, told the Associated Press they saw the captain in a lifeboat, covered by a blanket . . . .
Coast Guard officers later spotted Schettino on land as the evacuation unfolded. The officers urged him to return to his ship and honor his duty to stay aboard until everyone was safely off the vessel, but he ignored them, Coast Guard Cmdr. Francesco Paolillo said.
. . .
The route the ship followed turned out to be too close to the coast, and it seems that his decision in handling the emergency didn't follow Costa Crociere's procedures . . . .
Jorgen Loren, chairman of the Swedish Maritime Officer's Association, said the captain clearly deviated from the ship's intended route.
"It is remarkable because weather conditions were good and these cruise ships have the best and most modern technical equipment. All conditions were ideal," he said.

(Emphasis mine.) Isn't "Schettino" Italian for "little shit"? Just askin'.

Added: For those of you having trouble with Google Earth, here's a map.

Follow me on Twitter.

Posted by: rdbrewer at 04:49 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Chico Marx lives!

Posted by: Chuckit at January 16, 2012 04:50 PM (NXMlK)

2 **Honks Horn**

Posted by: Harpo Marx at January 16, 2012 04:51 PM (MNCju)

3 Captain Smith should come back from the dead and slap him around. Yes, he sunk his ship too, but he paid for it with his life.

Posted by: Barb the Evil Genius at January 16, 2012 04:53 PM (MyByM)

4 Capt. Shettino: Hey! I've got a great idea.

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2012 04:53 PM (lDaH4)

5 Reminds me of Perry DEEPTHROATING a Corndog.

Posted by: Bob Dole at January 16, 2012 04:53 PM (G6kli)

6 Profiles in courage: Italian edition.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at January 16, 2012 04:54 PM (SY2Kh)

7 Pfft...and you thought joo drivers were bad!

Posted by: Ron Paul at January 16, 2012 04:55 PM (8ieXv)

8 Racistee Congressional Republicans caused that boat to crash not the idiot Captain, with no, I repeat no, history inside Chicagos bath houses.

-Jay Carney

Posted by: Shiggz at January 16, 2012 04:55 PM (RfvTE)

9 There's no slut like an Italian slut.

Posted by: Stuff Grandpa said... at January 16, 2012 04:57 PM (MNCju)

10 Salvaging that ship is going to be a bitch. I also just learned that the dems are looking at Capt. Shettino for a 2012 congressional run.

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2012 04:57 PM (lDaH4)

11 Oh-a my God-a...Im-a-so-a-sorry-a!

Posted by: Captain Schettino at January 16, 2012 04:57 PM (huzn1)

12 Hey, I was just browsing my Kindle at the bar. I've was reading about the Marie Celeste and lost all track of time.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 04:58 PM (AZGON)

13 Well, isn't he special.

Posted by: Gmac at January 16, 2012 04:58 PM (k2Fyd)

14 Okay, how about this... I was dredging the harbor on a volunteer basis.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 04:59 PM (AZGON)

15 "Gentlemen, Schettino here may talk like an idiot,
and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you, he really is an
idiot."

Posted by: TheQuietMan at January 16, 2012 04:59 PM (1Jaio)

16 As far as nautical terminology, I imagine a phrase like 'more or less' is frowned upon.

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 16, 2012 05:00 PM (yR5O2)

17 Is anyone else getting a blurry image at those coordinates?

Posted by: Buzzsaw at January 16, 2012 05:00 PM (tf9Ne)

18 Hey, all those guys sound like mobsters.

WTF? A mob cruise?

Oh, it's wop talk, I forgot.

Posted by: Billy Bob, pseudo-intellectual at January 16, 2012 05:00 PM (hXJOG)

19
Eh, a-Guiseppe!

A-watcha-thees!

Posted by: Cpt Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:01 PM (SgLsM)

20 The captain wasn't THAT drunk. I'd served him.

Posted by: Diane Sawyer's bartender at January 16, 2012 05:01 PM (hXJOG)

21 I stop at Red Lights, more or less.

Posted by: nevergiveup at January 16, 2012 05:02 PM (i6RpT)

22 The officers urged him to return to his ship and honor his duty to stay aboard until everyone was safely off the vessel, but he ignored them

If the carabinieri had only spoken to me in my dialect, I would have understood. I thought they were gypsies, trying to sell me charms and palm readings.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:02 PM (AZGON)

23 Bet no one thinks cruise-ship lifeboat practice is a joke now. Ah, who am I fucking kidding?

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2012 05:02 PM (lDaH4)

24 When this story broke I was as guilty (or more) of making all of the stereotypical jokes about drinking and womanizing etc..
It's amazing how this friggin' idiot blew past that without batting an eye.
To leave the passengers stranded while escaping under blanket will live on in derisive legend.

Posted by: ontherocks at January 16, 2012 05:03 PM (ZJCDy)

25 As far as nautical terminology, I imagine a phrase like 'more or less' is frowned upon. Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 16, 2012 05:00 PM

Hah!

Posted by: rdbrewer at January 16, 2012 05:03 PM (b3qHR)

26 But I still earnedsome kind ofaward for getting a cruise liner closest to the shore, no? There's an award for that? Yes?

Posted by: Captain Shitteeno at January 16, 2012 05:03 PM (xgj/f)

27 Cpt. Schettino was shocked to discover that 950-foot cruise ships don't handle quite like Formula 1 cars.

Posted by: kartoffel at January 16, 2012 05:03 PM (OgNv0)

28 Schettino doesn't actually sound like shit - I mean the word doesn't. Italian -sch- is pronounced like English -sk-, so his name is pronounced something like Skeh-TEE-noh.

I didn't recognize the word, so I looked up 'schettino' in my Cambridge Italian Dictionary. It turns out to mean 'roller skate'. You can make a joke out of that if you want - I bet Schettino's still hoping to 'skate' on the charges - but it would be a stretch.

Posted by: Dr. Weevil at January 16, 2012 05:04 PM (dGW2y)

29 Eh, a-Guiseppe!

Holda my Grappa

A-watcha-thees!

FIFY

Posted by: Buzzsaw at January 16, 2012 05:04 PM (tf9Ne)

30 If the carabinieri had only spoken to me in my dialect, I would have
understood. I thought they were gypsies, trying to sell me charms and
palm readings

I got a reading for you, you're fucked.

Posted by: The Head Gypsie at January 16, 2012 05:04 PM (hXJOG)

31 I'm so shocked that an Italian captain fled his doomed ship in a panic.

Posted by: Random at January 16, 2012 05:04 PM (YiE0S)

32 Ophelie Gondelle and David Du Pays, told the Associated Press they saw the captain in a lifeboat, covered by a blanket

Stupid landlubbers can't tell a navigation chart from a Snuggie. I was triangulating, I tell you.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:04 PM (AZGON)

33 Five are dead. Fifteen are still missing.

I can tell by the pic that authorities have a pretty good idea where to look for those missing people.

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2012 05:04 PM (lDaH4)

34
One passenger reported seeing him in the bar, with a beautiful woman on his arm.

http://bit.ly/xSiRF5

In the photo he looks like a reject from Saturday Night Fever.

Posted by: Huusker at January 16, 2012 05:04 PM (Vq7P1)

35 'More or less' ( come si, come sa ) is a very common phrase in Italian

Ya just don't expect to hear it from captains

Posted by: SantaRosaStan at January 16, 2012 05:05 PM (UqKQV)

36 I wept when I realized that I could never be as courageous as the brave captain.

Posted by: Barack Hussein Obama at January 16, 2012 05:05 PM (ggRof)

37 Since Mitt is leading Florida, with almost 40%, a probably insurmountable odds. I would like to point out the exact same lessons I pointed out in 08 at this point.

-drop Iowa and New Hampshire. Have to do it now, not 3.5 years from now.

-Conservatives pick a favorite guy early/vet them early then stick with them the whole time. No picking 3-5 people divided amongst yourselves and jumping around frantically with every news cycle.

-spend more time financially boycotting dinosaur leftist News and Entertainment media and actively supporting conservative media. (this should work better then current system where conservatives shovel money at leftist media all while complaining about media bias)

-We need to find ways to stop leftist agitators from voting in republican primaries.

Posted by: Shiggz at January 16, 2012 05:05 PM (RfvTE)

38 One of the earlier reports I read said that he was seen drinking in a bar and that he had a beautiful woman on his arm.

Hey. First things first.

Posted by: rdbrewer at January 16, 2012 05:05 PM (b3qHR)

39 Is anyone else getting a blurry image at those coordinates?

Posted by: Buzzsaw at January 16, 2012 05:00 PM

Zoom out

Posted by: GE at January 16, 2012 05:06 PM (kqlYK)

40 'More or less' ( come si, come sa ) is a very common phrase in Italian

Ya just don't expect to hear it from captains
Posted by: SantaRosaStan at January 16, 2012 05:05 PM (UqKQV)

I use it all the time when Patients ask me "Doc is this gonna work"? I always tell them more or less. Covers me no matter what

Posted by: nevergiveup at January 16, 2012 05:06 PM (i6RpT)

41 and yes, it' comme si, comme ca' ......more or less

Posted by: SantaRosaStan at January 16, 2012 05:06 PM (UqKQV)

42 I wonder if that eye twitch the captain has is new, since the wreck.

Posted by: Barb the Evil Genius at January 16, 2012 05:06 PM (MyByM)

43 fuckin macaroni rascals, all of them

Posted by: Taiwanese News Anime Editor at January 16, 2012 05:07 PM (MNCju)

44 31
I'm so shocked that an Italian captain fled his doomed ship in a panic.

Well, his orders were to put it in reverse, for not doing so he will be servilely beaten with a wet noodle or two.

Posted by: Zombie Musolini at January 16, 2012 05:07 PM (hXJOG)

45 So these vessels must have such sophisticated sonar equipment, they're probably able to count the barnacles on the hull. This had to have been a case of the captain playing chicken with the rocks.

Posted by: AmishDude at January 16, 2012 05:07 PM (73tyQ)

46 I linked this and good interactive map at USA Today

Posted by: EBL at January 16, 2012 05:08 PM (IgakF)

47 I hope he's prosecuted for all those injured and killed.

May he die by the verdict of his peers.

Posted by: © Sponge at January 16, 2012 05:08 PM (UK9cE)

48 fleeing the scene

Yeah well sounds like he is familiar with admiralty court. They aren't about justice, they are about punishment. They will want some scalps over this. And he knows they are going to start with his and then work their way down. Unless the navigator logged a protest into the navigation log, he had better say goodbye to his hair too.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Camellia Sinensis Operative at January 16, 2012 05:08 PM (0q2P7)

49 check the tape to see if the 'captain' shrugged his shoulders when he said it

( it accentuates the deeper meaning of the phrase )

Posted by: SantaRosaStan at January 16, 2012 05:08 PM (UqKQV)

50 But, Captain Schettino saved or kept created over 4,000 lives.

Posted by: Barry Obama at January 16, 2012 05:09 PM (fM4AU)

51 @45

Tides and currents make a big fucking boat pretty easy to run a ground, especially if the captain is drunk.

Posted by: Zombie Musolini at January 16, 2012 05:09 PM (hXJOG)

52 Jorgen Loren, chairman of the Swedish Maritime Officer's Association, said the captain clearly deviated from the ship's intended route.

Leave it to a perverted Swede to play armchair skipper. I was in a titanic struggle with Neptune's wrath. Have any of you people stared into the maw of the Kraken and lived? After the fifth grappa I was ready to outdo Ahab, but I was thrown into a lifeboat by a rogue wave. Or maybe I just tripped. Same diff.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:09 PM (AZGON)

53 World Class hubris showboats right into the rocks while drinking with a bimbo.
Legendary.

Posted by: ontherocks at January 16, 2012 05:10 PM (ZJCDy)

54 Zoom out

Posted by: GE at January 16,

Thanks
I had zoomed out the first time and the whole island was blurry. I reloaded Google Earth and it works fine now.

Posted by: Buzzsaw at January 16, 2012 05:10 PM (tf9Ne)

55 We losta lika 5 people, we misplace more than thata every tripa.

Posted by: Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:10 PM (Sh42X)

56
37-spend more time... actively supporting conservative media.
"conservative media"? Where? Is there such a thing as 'conservative media'?

Posted by: (o)_(o) at January 16, 2012 05:11 PM (xgj/f)

57 Took the ferry ( not the fairy--NTTAWWT ) from Brindisi to some crap-hole in the north of Greece once. Italian ship, etc

On the upper deck, you could hear loud singing from the bridge.

didn't sink, though.

Posted by: SantaRosaStan at January 16, 2012 05:11 PM (UqKQV)

58 38
One of the earlier reports I read said that he was seen drinking in a bar and that he had a beautiful woman on his arm.

Hey. First things first.

Posted by: rdbrewer at January 16, 2012 05:05 PM (b3qHR)
Does it really matter if he was drunk?Seriously. This isn't like driving a car. I'd be shocked if they actually have to pilot the ship by hand. GPS, sonar and a crew of between 1 and 2 thousand (I don't know how big the bridge crew is), this should be like piloting one of the cars in Jurassic Park. If you don't make it jump the track, just let it go.

Posted by: AmishDude at January 16, 2012 05:11 PM (73tyQ)

59 I had some TIE fighters on my tail, and I was trying to shake them off.

Posted by: Han Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:11 PM (q8xaf)

60 I dunno RD
The ship sank about a mile
North West of that point
If you look at the news feed, it is clear the ship sank on the ear-shaped headlands about 600 meters North of the small port, with the bow pointed South. In order for it to hit those rocks and sink like that, it would have had to continue North, turn around, and sink next to the shore.
Not to say that isn't what happened. Maybe Captain Campari was trying to make port.

Posted by: Haiku Guy at January 16, 2012 05:12 PM (5BXc/)

61 If the ship were made of paper this disaster would have been avoided.

Posted by: polynikes - Texan for Romney at January 16, 2012 05:12 PM (eFnXz)

62 Captain Schettino saved or kept created over 4,000 lives.

About 4000, and only five dead.
I have a 99.875% rate of success. See if any of you can beat that, amici.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:12 PM (AZGON)

63 Hic. Look at the bright side, buddy, the coastline here ain't "pristine" and you didn't dump any crude. Hic!

Posted by: Capt. Joseph Hazelwood at January 16, 2012 05:12 PM (ToZXn)

64
One passenger reported seeing him in the bar, with a beautiful woman on his arm.
From one of the articles linked on Drudge:

Schettino was quoted by Italian news sources as saying: 'The area was safe, the water was deep enough. We struck a stretch of rock that was not marked on the charts.'As far as I am concerned we were in perfectly navigable waters.'Umm... what?!?! The big fucking gash in the side of the ship doesn't kinda suggest otherwise, you cowardly imbecile?

Posted by: Hollowpoint at January 16, 2012 05:12 PM (SY2Kh)

65 At least my ship didn't capsize

Posted by: Capt. Hazelwood at January 16, 2012 05:12 PM (i6RpT)

66 At least I only oiled up a bunch of birds.

Posted by: Joseph Hazelwood at January 16, 2012 05:13 PM (fM4AU)

67 We should all send Capt Schettino a letter and tell him that many who voted for the SCOAMTknow exactly how he feels.

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2012 05:13 PM (lDaH4)

68
Capt. Schettino, graduate of 5 minute university.

Classmate: Fr. Guido Sarducci.

Posted by: Wodeshed at January 16, 2012 05:13 PM (SgLsM)

69 I love how most maps have an X labeled BIG FUCKIN' EXPOSED ROCK right there.

How could you miss that?

Posted by: Andy at January 16, 2012 05:13 PM (XG+Mn)

70 So is the vessel holed on both sides? Or just the port side? And if the port side, why did it founder to starboard?

Posted by: toby928© at January 16, 2012 05:13 PM (GTbGH)

71 The experts over at Cruise Critic think that somebody fat-fingered the GPS.

Posted by: Huusker at January 16, 2012 05:13 PM (Vq7P1)

72 so

Posted by: nevergiveup at January 16, 2012 05:13 PM (i6RpT)

73 Many Captains suffer from a very rare and sexy learning disability known as Sexlexia.

Posted by: Zapp Bannigan at January 16, 2012 05:13 PM (MNCju)

74 But, Captain Schettino saved or kept created over 4,000 lives.

He also crashed that ship into the rocks to prevent the worst sinking since the Great Depression. The passengers should be thanking him.

Posted by: kartoffel at January 16, 2012 05:14 PM (OgNv0)

75 Oh, I see your map now. I spoke about a minute too soon.
Yep, that's just the way it would have had to go. Dayum... Those rocks were sticking up out of the water, and he hit them anyway. In my limited experience, such stupidity requires the involvement of either women or alcohol, but usuallly both...

Posted by: Haiku Guy at January 16, 2012 05:14 PM (5BXc/)

76 Daily Mail reports Captain may have been drinking prior to the collision (great photos at the Daily Mail link).

Posted by: EBL at January 16, 2012 05:14 PM (IgakF)

77 Cruise ships don't just "tip over", people. Well, unless I lean over the side railing. Google it!

Posted by: Rosie O'Donnel at January 16, 2012 05:15 PM (2jQGY)

78 >>>Isn't "Schettino" Italian for "little shit"?

No, but it is now. lol!

How old is the captain?

Posted by: mike at January 16, 2012 05:15 PM (WNvlG)

79 I could have landed an Airbus in that water without so much as a scratch.

Posted by: Captain Sullenberger at January 16, 2012 05:15 PM (vjyZP)

80 53
World Class hubris showboats USA right into the rocks while drinking with a bimbo. pretending to be president.
Legendary.

Posted by: ontherocks at January 16, 2012 05:10 PM (ZJCDy)

Posted by: Reality at January 16, 2012 05:15 PM (sJKFk)

81 Remind me to never hire Schettino. Not even as a flight attendant.

Posted by: Captain Chesley Sullenberger at January 16, 2012 05:15 PM (AZGON)

82 From what I've read it seems he hit something further offshore -- or if you want to believe some far-fetched concept his lawyers are cooking up -- some major mechanical function malfunctioned. He then turned in toward shore -- which probably saved quite a few lives of the people who could then swim the short distance. Can't fault him for that. If you look at the size of the ship at steam, then the amount of the ship that is sitting on the bottom, the water is really really deep right up to the shoreline. Based on historical averages for January the water temp in the area was around 57 degrees -- not the freezing temperatures I heard on the tv.

Still seems like he was showboatin' and needs to spend some time behind bars. Like the rest of his life.

Posted by: Schrödinger's cat at January 16, 2012 05:16 PM (phlKA)

83 If you look at the news feed, it is clear the ship sank on the
ear-shaped headlands about 600 meters North of the small port, with the
bow pointed South. In order for it to hit those rocks and sink like
that, it would have had to continue North, turn around, and sink next to
the shore.

No, after the hit, the ship was still moving north. He dropped the port anchor to swing the ship around toward the harbor.

Posted by: rdbrewer at January 16, 2012 05:16 PM (b3qHR)

84 Tides and currents make a big fucking boat pretty easy to run a ground, especially if the captain is drunk.

Posted by: Zombie Musolini at January 16, 2012 05:09 PM (hXJOG)
Really doesn't seem to be the case here that tides and currents were a problem.Again, regarding drunk, were his hands on the wheel? If Captain Kirk were drunk, that wouldn't mean Sulu would crash the ship...unless he was busy looking at Chekhov's ass.

Posted by: AmishDude at January 16, 2012 05:16 PM (73tyQ)

85 Rock, hull, water
Rock, hull, water

Anyone ever play that game?

Posted by: nevergiveup at January 16, 2012 05:16 PM (i6RpT)

86 It sounds like the captain did a double fuck up.

First he hits the rocks, and then he steers the ship into shallow water, so the equalizers in the bottom of the ship could not work.

The ship was upright, until they ran aground, then it listed because there was not enough water under the ship to transfer the weight.

Either that, or he was already on shore and had no clue what was going on.

Posted by: Billy Bob, pseudo-intellectual at January 16, 2012 05:17 PM (hXJOG)

87 I'm wondering why there isn't more of an outrage. Anytime there is an oil spill, I have to fucking hear that it is the end of the world. But when a bunch of people get killed, not so much...

Posted by: mike at January 16, 2012 05:17 PM (WNvlG)

88 At least I didn't run into an iceberg in the middle of nowhere. Sweet Neptune, some of the passengers swam to shore. They needed that exercise, after the way we feed them onboard.

You'd think I'd earn a medal.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:17 PM (AZGON)

89 May he die by the verdict of his peers.
Posted by: © Sponge at January 16, 2012 05:08 PM (UK9cE)
And as we learned from the Amanda Knox trial, Italy doesn't have a "double-jeopardy" law.
Thus concludes my knowledge of any sort of law-type suff.

Posted by: ErikW at January 16, 2012 05:17 PM (dA8Ib)

90 This would make an excellent advertising opportunity for competing cruise lines like Norwegian or Royal Caribbean: "Come cruise with us. Wedon't sink, like those other guys".

Posted by: LGoPs at January 16, 2012 05:17 PM (lHn6+)

91 I bet it was those evil soggies who caused the crash.

Posted by: Capn'n Crunch at January 16, 2012 05:18 PM (vjyZP)

92 Is this the same guy who crashed his USS Greenville into the Eihme Maru?
What a fucking loser.

Posted by: Joseph Hazelwood at January 16, 2012 05:18 PM (ELPgk)

93
What's he mean by charts? Don't they use radar/sonar/gaydar?

Posted by: mike at January 16, 2012 05:18 PM (WNvlG)

94 I was with Kate Winslet on that boat.

We both got off. IYKWIM

Posted by: I am the walrus, goo-goo-ga-joo at January 16, 2012 05:19 PM (ybkwK)

95 87
I'm wondering why there isn't more of an outrage. Anytime there is an
oil spill, I have to fucking hear that it is the end of the world. But
when a bunch of people get killed, not so much...

Thank God no seals were killed!

Posted by: PETA at January 16, 2012 05:19 PM (hXJOG)

96 This guy would make an awesome Cruise Ship Czar.

Posted by: Barack Obama at January 16, 2012 05:19 PM (2jQGY)

97 The story in the sidebar about F-35 is bullshit.

Posted by: steevy at January 16, 2012 05:19 PM (7W3wI)

98 I'll buy the movie rights if we can make Schettino's character a Christian Republican.

Posted by: James Cameron at January 16, 2012 05:19 PM (AZGON)

99 There was no reef strike. This is what happens when you mix pasta and anti-pasta.

Posted by: LGoPs at January 16, 2012 05:19 PM (lHn6+)

100 Reminds me of Perry DEAPTHROATING a corndog
Thank GOD we will not have to see that again.....ever.

Posted by: Thatcher the Milk Snatcher at January 16, 2012 05:19 PM (rZZA3)

101 RECALCULATING!!!

Posted by: Mayhem at January 16, 2012 05:20 PM (SgLsM)

102 This would make an excellent advertising opportunity for competing cruise lines like Norwegian or Royal Caribbean: "Come cruise with us. Wedon't sink, like those other guys".

We have butter.

Posted by: Those Other Guys Cruislines at January 16, 2012 05:20 PM (MNCju)

103 The story in the sidebar about F-35 is bullshit.
Posted by: steevy at January 16, 2012 05:19 PM (7W3wI)

What does it say?

Posted by: nevergiveup at January 16, 2012 05:20 PM (i6RpT)

104 99
There was no reef strike. This is what happens when you mix pasta and anti-pasta.

Posted by: LGoPs at January 16, 2012 05:19 PM (lHn6+)
Ha!

Posted by: AmishDude at January 16, 2012 05:20 PM (73tyQ)

105 The Italian prosecutors put that Seattle gal and her bf in jail for years on total bullshit. What do you bet this guy gets his hand slapped?

Posted by: mike at January 16, 2012 05:20 PM (WNvlG)

106 I love how most maps have an X labeled BIG FUCKIN' EXPOSED ROCK right there.How could you miss that?
Posted by: Andy at January 16, 2012 05:13 PM (XG+Mn)
Well, when you've been slamming Jager Bombs at the bar with some random chick and decide to deiviate 4 miles from the plotted course to give a shout-out to a homie, stupid shit happens.

Posted by: ErikW at January 16, 2012 05:20 PM (dA8Ib)

107
The Law of the Sea requires Captain Crap-in-pants to be hung by the neck until dead. I just made that up, but it would be a befitting end, but only after he suffers public humiliation in a court of law. And a good ass whippin' by the survivors.

Posted by: Doctor Fish at January 16, 2012 05:21 PM (TkGkA)

108 the Med does not have strong currents, as I recall; not like the North Sea.

maybe someone released the Krakken......

Posted by: SantaRosaStan at January 16, 2012 05:21 PM (UqKQV)

109 Give-a give-a give-a Garmin.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:21 PM (AZGON)

110 Is that a waterline I see on that big rock? It looks like the left half of it was exposed, with green growth, while the right side of it was under water.

Posted by: Haiku Guy at January 16, 2012 05:21 PM (5BXc/)

111 First he hits the rocks, and then he steers the ship into shallow water,
so the equalizers in the bottom of the ship could not work.

Yeah, I read something like that. I also read that in deeper water the compartmental construction of the hull would have limited the flooding to the areas right around the gash. Because it beached like that, it tipped, allowing water to migrate. Something like that.

But, hey, according to Little Shit, most of the passengers survived. So... win!

Posted by: rdbrewer at January 16, 2012 05:22 PM (b3qHR)

112
The passengers reported hearing a loud crunch as they sat down to dinner. The ship immediately started to list, with plates falling on the floor. Then captain went on the PAwith a lame explanation of an'electrical problem'.

Posted by: Huusker at January 16, 2012 05:22 PM (Vq7P1)

113
...and here he is in the flesh.

Schettino is kind of a guido.

Posted by: Wodeshed at January 16, 2012 05:22 PM (SgLsM)

114 Uh, yeah, that rock... uh, that is actually our onboard climbing wall in the gym below decks. Yeah, gym.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:22 PM (AZGON)

115 Look Mamma, no hands!

Posted by: Captain Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:22 PM (fM4AU)

116 One of the earlier reports I read said that he was seen drinking in a bar and that he had a beautiful woman on his arm.

I think we should hold off on judgement until we see this chick...am I right?

Posted by: garrett at January 16, 2012 05:23 PM (MNCju)

117 The experts over at Cruise Critic think that somebody fat-fingered the GPS.
Posted by: Huusker at January 16, 2012 05:13 PM (Vq7P1)

And to this day I'm convinced that that's why I was never chosen to be an astronaut.

Posted by: Michael Moore at January 16, 2012 05:23 PM (lDaH4)

118
We-a hit the rock-a...... we tip-a over...... and all I can-a hear-a is the propeller going-a wop-wop-wop-wop.

Posted by: Captain Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:24 PM (C8hzL)

119 Captain was asleep at the helm, havin' a Wet Dream

Posted by: Dr. Demento at January 16, 2012 05:24 PM (dOsjQ)

120 So an asteroid hit the cruise ship?

Posted by: CDR M at January 16, 2012 05:24 PM (y67bA)

121 I suppose it is just coincidental that the harbor's name is almost exactly "Gigli."

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:24 PM (AZGON)

122 Try that again:

Captain was asleep at the helm, havin' a Wet Dream

Posted by: Dr. Demento at January 16, 2012 05:25 PM (dOsjQ)

123 And the thing is, the rocks have lifeless eyes ...

Posted by: quint at January 16, 2012 05:25 PM (GTbGH)

124 @113

Well, at least he has a Gold Amex card with him!

Posted by: Billy Bob, pseudo-intellectual at January 16, 2012 05:25 PM (hXJOG)

125
Ahhh...mi a-scuse. We have a little-a electric-a problem-a.

Thees-a water-a coming in-a on-a thees electronics-a.

Posted by: Captain Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:25 PM (SgLsM)

126
Can you fault the guy for playing a little bunga-bunga?

Posted by: mike at January 16, 2012 05:25 PM (WNvlG)

127 Look, would it help if I told you I was trying out for a spot on "Jackass?"

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:26 PM (AZGON)

128 Some observations on the giant rock thing that makes me pretty certain that the rock that boat hit isn't one visible on google earth.

1. The damage is on the side away from shore. Unless they did a 180, and they may have, it wasn't that large rock labeled in the map.

2. The damage is well below the water line, meaning the rock(s) they hit is well below water. You can get an image of something below most water to a small extent, but you have to be imaging for it since only certain wavelengths provide meaningful penetration of the water. I highly doubt that something at that depth would be visible except in certain Caribbean-like waters

3. That big rock labeled is still part of the shore, or has it's own shore. I would think that they were probably 300-meters from that point.

I am an Imagery Analyst with about 15 years of experience.

Also, a small collection of some high-res images http://bit.ly/zeCZKE

Posted by: f2000 at January 16, 2012 05:26 PM (FcMtg)

129 Then captain went on the PAwith a lame explanation of an'electrical problem'.

Maybe Florida can lend them Old Sparky so he can learn about electrical problems.

Posted by: Buzzsaw at January 16, 2012 05:26 PM (tf9Ne)

130 The French have their army. The Italian's now have this dic*head.

Posted by: dblwmy at January 16, 2012 05:27 PM (BvTwT)

131
The socialist Italian government won't permit Captian Schettino's termination. He has a job for life. The only way to resolve this matter is a phone call to Tony Soprano and a fishing trip to Lake Tahoe.

Posted by: Doctor Fish at January 16, 2012 05:27 PM (TkGkA)

132 If this guy doesn't get hard time he'll be lucky to captain the Hippo Tour in a Congo river canoe.

Posted by: ontherocks at January 16, 2012 05:27 PM (ZJCDy)

133 Yeah, he was probably getting his wang squoze.

And everyone else on the bridge was watching.

Posted by: rdbrewer at January 16, 2012 05:28 PM (b3qHR)

134 He isn't really a ship's captain, though he did sleep in a Holiday Inn Express the night before the voyage.

Posted by: real joe at January 16, 2012 05:28 PM (w7Lv+)

135 Also at that link, one of the pictures at the bottom includes a picture of a rock impaled into the ship.

Posted by: f2000 at January 16, 2012 05:29 PM (FcMtg)

136 I get us a shore, BUT,

First you will blow me!

Posted by: Captain Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:29 PM (hXJOG)

137 He's done a great favor to millions of irresponsible and incomptetent menworldwide. None of us ever fucked up anything within four orders of magnitude of this level of suck. We all look better by comparison.
Thanx, Cap'n Littleshit!

Posted by: Wm T Sherman at January 16, 2012 05:29 PM (w41GQ)

138 Seriously, a-though. That will-aprobably buff-aright out. I don't athink your Papa's even-a gonna notice.

Posted by: Firsta Mate at January 16, 2012 05:30 PM (MNCju)

139 f2000, they dropped anchor to swing the ship around.

You can see more of the rock underwater in that picture. That's probably the part of the rock that was hit.

Did you look at the Google Earth pic?

Posted by: rdbrewer at January 16, 2012 05:30 PM (b3qHR)

140
f2000: So, that's why they are suppose to rely on their gaydar and not maps. Sheesh!

Posted by: mike at January 16, 2012 05:31 PM (WNvlG)

141 Hey, it was just like this. Pinky swear.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:31 PM (AZGON)

142 Isn't "Schettino" Italian for "little shit"? Just

heh.

I bet that Captain felt abschettino enter his shorts right after he hit that rock!

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 16, 2012 05:32 PM (niZvt)

143
I trust the Italian and French hooker's entertainers who were aboard are safe.

Posted by: Doctor Fish at January 16, 2012 05:32 PM (TkGkA)

144 Also at that link, one of the pictures at the bottom includes a picture of a rock impaled into the ship.

Does it look like the one at the top of this post?

Posted by: rdbrewer at January 16, 2012 05:32 PM (b3qHR)

145 @128

Yeah, note the second photo shows the ship still upright with life boats going down. When he lost depth, when the ship ran aground, the boat listed over.

What a cluster fuck.

Posted by: Billy Bob, pseudo-intellectual at January 16, 2012 05:33 PM (hXJOG)

146 @56 there's not like a specific channel but if you bother looking there are handfuls of conservative actors, films, writers, musicians.. etc..

Also there is lots of conservatives on youtube generating content

-Steven Crowder
-Bill Whittle

To name just two.

Posted by: Shiggz at January 16, 2012 05:33 PM (RfvTE)

147 f2000: Nice photos , by the way.

Posted by: mike at January 16, 2012 05:33 PM (WNvlG)

148 He's done a great favor to millions of irresponsible and incomptetent
menworldwide. None of us ever fucked up anything within four orders of
magnitude of this level of suck. We all look better by comparison.

Insert Barry Soreto economic policy metaphor HERE

Posted by: fixeruper at January 16, 2012 05:33 PM (C8hzL)

149 Ah. I didn't hear about the dropping anchor part and 180. I did look at google earth. I'm still pretty sure you can't actually see the rocks that they ran into, though they might be an extension of the topography that creates that peninsula/island

Posted by: f2000 at January 16, 2012 05:33 PM (FcMtg)

150 Was he coming into port or going out of port? Do Italian ship captains know the difference?

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2012 05:33 PM (lDaH4)

151 Also at that link, one of the pictures at the bottom includes a picture of a rock impaled into the ship.

Datsa da bale ass!

(Seriously, that pretty much disproves mechanical malfunction)

Posted by: Cap'n Crunch at January 16, 2012 05:33 PM (phlKA)

152 10
Salvaging that ship is going to be a bitch. I also just learned that the dems are looking at Capt. Shettino for a 2012 congressional run.
Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2012 04:57 PM (lDaH4)

Nah. One Maritime Safety Czar, comin' up!

Posted by: Jay Guevara at January 16, 2012 05:34 PM (rlCVH)

153 In my limited experience, such stupidity requires the involvement of either women or alcohol, but usuallly both...

In my limited experience, those two variables account for about 99.9% of all of humanity's stupidest moments.

Posted by: pep at January 16, 2012 05:34 PM (6TB1Z)

154 This is exactly why all new Italian naval vessels have glass bottoms. So they can see the old Italian naval vessels.

Posted by: LGoPs at January 16, 2012 05:35 PM (lHn6+)

155 sock begone

Posted by: fixerupper at January 16, 2012 05:35 PM (C8hzL)

156 Posted by: f2000 at January 16, 2012 05:26 PM (FcMtg)
My two centavos if I may.
From what we know so far, the ship was travelling at cruising speed instead of the much slower speed (think: no wake zone) required when coming into port.
The fact that the damage was done on the hull opposite of shore is kind of irrelevant because it's known to be rocky and a ship of that size and draft shouldn't have been anywhere near it in the first place.
Not trying to be a dick or anything, just comparing what I've learned with your comment.

Posted by: ErikW at January 16, 2012 05:35 PM (dA8Ib)

157 In my limited experience, such stupidity requires the involvement of either women or alcohol, but usuallly both...

In my limited experience, those two variables account for about 99.9% of all of humanity's stupidest moments.
Posted by: pep at January 16, 2012 05:34 PM (6TB1Z)

Well in order to say "I Do" .....

Posted by: nevergiveup at January 16, 2012 05:36 PM (i6RpT)

158 I resent these insinuations against my seamanship. I enjoy marine recreation in my spare time. For example, here are my sons enjoying our family runabout.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:36 PM (AZGON)

159 Captain Smith didn't have GPS and digital charts. Or radar. Or about fifteen other things that make it really, really hard to smack dead the fuck on into a big ass rock whose location has been known and charted since Carthage had a navy.

This feckless arsehole needs to spend the rest of his working life scrubbing bilges with a toothbrush.

Then he can spend his retirement salvaging birdcaged steel cable.

And then he can spend eternity getting cornholed by every Captain who ever chose to go down with his ship.

Posted by: A Balrog of Morgoth at January 16, 2012 05:36 PM (526dD)

160 That rock looks like the head of an eagle.

On some blogs they were speculating that the ship found a missing statue. The statue weighed tons and disappeared?

Posted by: ambrosia at January 16, 2012 05:36 PM (oZfic)

161 @153
153
In my limited experience, such stupidity requires the involvement of either women or alcohol, but usuallly both...
In my limited experience, those two variables account for about 99.9% of all of humanity's stupidest moments.
True Dat.

Posted by: Watch This!, last words of a redneck at January 16, 2012 05:37 PM (hXJOG)

162 Now that guy really needs a bailout.

Posted by: Barack Obama at January 16, 2012 05:37 PM (rlCVH)

163 Then captain went on the PAwith a lame explanation of an'electrical problem'.

Probably true. The rock nudoubtedly cut a few conduits.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at January 16, 2012 05:37 PM (Ah2mS)

164 If it has more than one wheel and two handles, an Italian shbouldn't be driving it.

Posted by: garrett at January 16, 2012 05:38 PM (MNCju)

165 Was he coming into port or going out of port? Do Italian ship captains know the difference?

Sounds like he may have been cycling in and out of her port at the time

Posted by: Buzzsaw at January 16, 2012 05:38 PM (tf9Ne)

166 Then captain went on the PA with a lame explanation of an 'electrical problem'.

Well, to be honest it was more of a plumbing mishap.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:38 PM (AZGON)

167 The Daily Mail has some excellent photos.

Posted by: mike at January 16, 2012 05:38 PM (WNvlG)

168 I agree that it seems nuts to be that close at all, but it is supposedly a common practice. I wonder if they weren't running heavier than the captain is used to, or he was just a bit off of the usual unsafe course.

Posted by: f2000 at January 16, 2012 05:39 PM (FcMtg)

169 Tonight we drink every time Noot says he's a Reagan conservative.

Posted by: soothie at January 16, 2012 05:39 PM (OHhPo)

170 The Daily Mail has some excellent photos.

Agreed, a couple of good ones of Katy Perry.

Posted by: Waterhouse at January 16, 2012 05:39 PM (q8xaf)

171

This whole disaster reminds me of that song...... The Wreck of the Ella Fitzgerald.

Posted by: Meghan McCain at January 16, 2012 05:39 PM (C8hzL)

172 Was this his first trip through that area? If not...WTF?!

Posted by: Tami at January 16, 2012 05:40 PM (X6akg)

173 I blame Bush.

Posted by: Barack Obama at January 16, 2012 05:40 PM (rlCVH)

174 Well, he can't blame this one on faulty Lucas electronics.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at January 16, 2012 05:41 PM (Ah2mS)

175 I wonder if they weren't running heavier than the captain is used to...

Dat's a more a cushion for a the pushin'!

Posted by: garreCapt Francesco Schettinott at January 16, 2012 05:41 PM (MNCju)

176 From Hell's heart I stab at thee

Posted by: The Big Fukkin' Rock at January 16, 2012 05:41 PM (OlN4e)

177 So, is anybody up for flying Italia Airlines now?

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2012 05:41 PM (lDaH4)

178 This whole disaster reminds me of that song...... The Wreck of the Ella Fitzgerald.

One of Gordon Lighthouse's finest.

Posted by: f2000 at January 16, 2012 05:41 PM (FcMtg)

179 Drink every time Noot says 3 pinnochios.

Posted by: soothie at January 16, 2012 05:42 PM (oB2II)

180
173
I blame Bush.

Yeah..... her AND the champagne.

Posted by: aptain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:42 PM (C8hzL)

181 He screwed how many people at the same time?

Now that's an Italian man!

Posted by: Silvio Berlusconi at January 16, 2012 05:43 PM (xKC/c)

182 Captain Schettino the JarJar Binks of ship captains.

Posted by: Shiggz at January 16, 2012 05:43 PM (RfvTE)

183 Italian boat captains will forever be branded little shit cowards by this Capt. Shittino.

Posted by: Capt. Bite-a-me-a at January 16, 2012 05:43 PM (51Nv7)

184 "We were about 300 meters from the shore, more or less."
Alex Trebek, "BackwardsBoy for $1000. You were first on the buzzer."
BB, "Alex, what is "less"?"

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, CEO Curmudgeons INC. at January 16, 2012 05:43 PM (d0Tfm)

185
Well, what do you know? Captain Schettino drives a minivan!

Posted by: Wodeshed at January 16, 2012 05:43 PM (SgLsM)

186 put schettino into google translate you won't believe what you get.

Posted by: ambrosia at January 16, 2012 05:44 PM (oZfic)

187 Hey, il camerata, tiene il mio Lambrusco e guarda questo!

Posted by: Franky the Shit at January 16, 2012 05:44 PM (3raPN)

188 danglingsock-afix

Posted by: garrett at January 16, 2012 05:45 PM (MNCju)

189
Looking at the pics, one shows what appears to be a section underwater that doesn't correspond with the visible damage. Almost as if the area not visible got holed. If so, then the vessel may be unsalvageable. Also may explain why it heeled to the "undamaged" side.

Posted by: irongrampa at January 16, 2012 05:46 PM (SAMxH)

190 Posted by: ambrosia at January 16, 2012 05:44 PM (oZfic)

Did Kudlow want his saying back?

Posted by: Tami at January 16, 2012 05:46 PM (X6akg)

191 P.S. For those ruminating whether it was this rock or that rock or whatever? It doesn't matter.

There's these things called soundings on nautical charts. If the depth of the water is less than ones draft + a safety factor (usually a sort of fudge, but accounting for squat, i.e. the stern sinking down in the water as one moves forward, plus a couple of feet, as a minimum), one steers one's ship well clear.

Posted by: A Balrog of Morgoth at January 16, 2012 05:46 PM (526dD)

192
I have it on good authority that he last captained a shrimp boat.

Posted by: Wodeshed at January 16, 2012 05:47 PM (SgLsM)

193 It's pretty tough to think of a case of incomprehensible negligence followed with spontaneously profound cowardice that surpasses this one, but that may be a good idea for a thread.

Posted by: ontherocks at January 16, 2012 05:48 PM (ZJCDy)

194 Captain Schettino = Obama

United States = Costa Concordia

Posted by: Christina Hendricks's Mighty Jugs Supports Rick Perry's Hair for President at January 16, 2012 05:48 PM (TCyyS)

195
Inside Job.

Never in the history of man has rock been harder than steel. Google it!!!!

Posted by: Rosie O Donnell at January 16, 2012 05:48 PM (C8hzL)

196

I'm-a da king-a-da-world-a!

Posted by: Capt. Schettino, channeling his inner DiCaprio at January 16, 2012 05:48 PM (SgLsM)

197 Does any one know where the love of girls go
when the drinks turn the minutes to hours?
The searchers all know they'd have made Giglio
if they'd put fifteen less Jägers behind 'er.
They might have thrown up or they might have passed out;
they may have drank Scotch and took water.
And all that remains is the rock, 'tis a shame
that pokes out from the hull where it bought her.

Posted by: not Gordon Lightfoot at January 16, 2012 05:49 PM (AZGON)

198 "We were about 300 meters from the shore, more or less."

Terrific, except the rock was about 301 meters from the shore, more or less.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at January 16, 2012 05:49 PM (rlCVH)

199 Watching FNC about this very thing. That is one venti ship.

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2012 05:50 PM (lDaH4)

200 Schettino is definitely Cabinet material.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at January 16, 2012 05:50 PM (rlCVH)

201

"Hey Pinky, I'm da Captain and youa da First Mate. Keepa an eye for that why-a-duck"

"HONK!"

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at January 16, 2012 05:50 PM (3wBRE)

202 costa cruises statement.

Posted by: ambrosia at January 16, 2012 05:51 PM (oZfic)

203 Terrific, except the rock was about 301 meters from the shore, more or less.

Well, at least now we know exactly where it is. Until someone pulls it out, anyway.

Posted by: Captain Francesco Schettino at January 16, 2012 05:51 PM (AZGON)

204 Dear Capt. Schettino:

Hey, buddy, thanks for taking the heat off me for a while. I owe you one.

A 10 year old OK?

Jerry Sandusky

Posted by: Jerry Sandusky at January 16, 2012 05:52 PM (AxHOT)

205 I'll bet that ship will go to salvage, that there is a hell of a lot more damage than shows.

Posted by: irongrampa at January 16, 2012 05:52 PM (SAMxH)

206 Captain Schettino = ObamaUnited States = Costa Concordia
Posted by: Christina Hendricks's Mighty Jugs Supports Rick Perry's Hair for President at January 16, 2012 05:48 PM (TCyyS)

Actually, that could be made into a boffo campaign ad. Current and readily identifiable.

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2012 05:53 PM (lDaH4)

207

A guy wants to join the Italian army but finds out that only every
other guy is getting a rifle when he goes to sign up. He goes home and
thinks about it and goes and joins up the next day.

The DI comes in the next day and tells everyone they are going to the
rifle range to qualify. This guy stands up and says, "Hey Sgt, no gotta
no gun, no can shoot." Sgt. says, "No problem. You goa-bangity bang and you will be ok."

Well, the guy goes out gets up on line and goes a-bangity bang a few times and gets a medal for marksmanship.

Next day the DI says today is bayonet practice. Same guy says, "Hey, Inot gotta no gun, no can put bayonet." DI says, "You go a-stickity stick and you will be okay."

Well, you know the story. Our hero goes out goes a-stickity stick and gets a medal for his efforts.

Next day the DI says today is war games. He looks at our hero and
tells him because he is so good he has to hold the high ground. Tells
him anything that comes up the hill he has to stop. Ahh, a good day. Up
the hill comes his first subject. He jumps up and goes a-bangity bang, and the guy falls down and the hill is safe. Another unsuspecting trooper comes his way, and our hero jumps up and goes a-bangity bang, but the guy keeps coming. So our hero runs down the hill and goes a-stickity stick, and the guy goes down.The hill is still safe. Well, here comes contestant number three. Our hero jumps up and goes a-bangity bang, and the guy keeps coming. Our hero runs down and goes a-stickity stick, and the guy walks right on over him, tramples him into the dirt and walks right up the hill.

Well, this really gets to our hero. He jumps up yelling,"Hey whats a matta you. I go a-bangity bang, you no fall down. I go a-stickity stick, you no fall down."

The other trooper turns around looks at our hero and says: "A-TANKITY TANK."

Posted by: Wodeshed at January 16, 2012 05:53 PM (SgLsM)

208 Dear Carnival Cruises:

Short a captain?
I'm tanned, rested and ready.

Posted by: Gilligan at January 16, 2012 05:54 PM (AZGON)

209
Damn, is that red shirted one on The 5 riding high?

Posted by: Jimmah at January 16, 2012 05:57 PM (TMeYE)

210 There's these things called soundings on nautical charts. If the depth of the water is less than ones draft + a safety factor (usually a sort of fudge, but accounting for squat, i.e. the stern sinking down in the water as one moves forward, plus a couple of feet, as a minimum), one steers one's ship well clear.
Posted by: A Balrog of Morgoth at January 16, 2012 05:46 PM (526dD)
Here's what I don't get. If the Captain made the decision to deviate and do the "flyby" that Costa ships sometimes do, wouldn't you at least have aplotted and recognizeddeep water course?
And where were the officers?
Sounds like the whole organization is run by clowns, which, incidentally, is owned by Carnival.

Posted by: ErikW at January 16, 2012 05:57 PM (dA8Ib)

211 Sounds like the whole organization is run by clowns, which, incidentally, is owned by Carnival.

We take our corporate identity very seriously.

Posted by: Carnival Cruises at January 16, 2012 05:58 PM (AZGON)

212 Do rocksbreak steel, or does steelbreak rocks? Something is fishy with this story. The janitor who spotted the captain hauling ass said he saw him mouthing "pull it".

Posted by: Jimmah at January 16, 2012 05:59 PM (TMeYE)

213 There's no sense to this. The Italian government won't find any either.

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2012 05:59 PM (lDaH4)

214 Protip: While making a play at some strange cooter, never showboat when you're the captain of a cruise liner.

Posted by: Fritz at January 16, 2012 06:00 PM (3raPN)

215 I'll bet that ship will go to salvage, that there is a hell of a lot more damage than shows.
Posted by: irongrampa at January 16, 2012 05:52 PM (SAMxH)
The ship has been moving around with the tide, grinding it against a rocky bottom. Plus, I read that it sits on the edge of a 245 foot cliff.

Posted by: ErikW at January 16, 2012 06:00 PM (dA8Ib)

216 47
I hope he's prosecuted for all those injured and killed.

My godfather is from a family who has lived on the water their whole life, and his brother was a charter boat captain in FL. We talked about it today, and he was CERTAIN that the captain would be prosecuted. The whole "the captain goes down with the ship" is not a slogan- I actually think it is maritime law, and he expects this guy to go to jail.

Posted by: shibumi at January 16, 2012 06:00 PM (z63Tr)

217 After this recent bad publicity, we're thinking of renaming our company to something less dubious, like Daredevil Joyrides.

Posted by: Carnival Cruises at January 16, 2012 06:01 PM (AZGON)

218
Hell, I can buy forward looking sonar for my own boat.

I live most of the year on the NC coast, where there's a lot of very shallow water. I never run aground. Why? I watch the tides, and if I don't know the waters I run at slow speed with an eagle eye on the depth.

Posted by: Wodeshed at January 16, 2012 06:02 PM (SgLsM)

219 57 Took the ferry ( not the fairy--NTTAWWT ) from Brindisi to some crap-hole in the north of Greece once. Italian ship, etc. On the upper deck, you could hear loud singing from the bridge. didn't sink, though.
________
Lived in Italy (Tirrenia, a ways north of where all this happened) when I was in 5th grade; Dad was stationed at Camp Darby.
Had an Italian school bus driver one day. Took a corner on two wheels. Never saw him again.

Posted by: Anachronda at January 16, 2012 06:12 PM (6fER6)

220 I live most of the year on the NC coast, where there's a lot of very
shallow water. I never run aground. Why? I watch the tides, and if I
don't know the waters I run at slow speed with an eagle eye on the
depth.

Running around in waters known as the 'graveyard of the Atlantic' might have a little something to do with that, too. I'm jealous. Wanted to move there a bunch of years ago but just couldn't shed the real estate here. Had an agreement on a lot on the Outer Banks. All the ducks lined up. Then... splat.

Posted by: Cap'n Crunch at January 16, 2012 06:13 PM (phlKA)

221
Covered in a blanket? Like Bill Clinton in the back seat of the White House limo, when he was going out to see Monica?

Posted by: J. Moses Browning at January 16, 2012 06:20 PM (0Enhr)

222
This would be the first time in history that rock cut steel. I blame the Mossad!

Posted by: Rosie O'Donnell at January 16, 2012 06:22 PM (0Enhr)

223 A three hour tour ... a three hour tour ...

Posted by: Jay Guevara at January 16, 2012 06:26 PM (rlCVH)

224 Running around in waters known as the 'graveyard of the Atlantic' might have a little something to do with that, too. I'm jealous. Wanted to move there a bunch of years ago but just couldn't shed the real estate here. Had an agreement on a lot on the Outer Banks. All the ducks lined up. Then... splat.
Posted by: Cap'n Crunch at January 16, 2012 06:13 PM (phlKA)
In my book, the OBX is the nicest,most quietstrip of beach in the country.
I live in a rural area of Ohio andthe strip between Corolla and Nags Head is my redneck town except on a beach.

I love it there.

Posted by: ErikW at January 16, 2012 06:32 PM (dA8Ib)

225 Wanted to move there a bunch of years ago but just couldn't shed the real estate here.

Lower the selling price.

Posted by: Alan Greenspent at January 16, 2012 06:36 PM (GdalM)

226 Not to be that guy, but I think you have the wrong rock. If you look at the press pictures the town is visible from the wreck. I think the right culprit is at 42.36490, 10.92100 to the north of town.

Posted by: Cosmic Penguin at January 16, 2012 06:46 PM (BTEcx)

227 Wasn't there another Italian captain who abandoned his cruise ship a few years ago when there was an emergency? He said afterward" I gave the order to abandon ship, so I abandoned the ship"

Posted by: ciceroskip at January 16, 2012 06:48 PM (CdSVT)

228 Since many like to impugn Italians and their courage (often with good reason),a little story if I may. My fatherwasborn in Italy, emigrated to the USA at 12, and joined the American Army in 1944, servedin Gen. Patton's Ghost Troops. After the war hewas sent to Camp Bowie in Texas where he met my future mother at the local grocery store. They started seeing each other, much to the dismay of my grandfather, the Texas rancher. Silas finally went to Camp Bowie and demanded to see my Dad's commnding officer.
He said, "I don't know what to think about this Italian kid that keeps hanging around my daughter, what's your take on him?"The answer was, "All I can tell you is, if I'd had a thousand like him, the damn war wouldhave been over a lot sooner."
Grandpa decided to give his blessing, which why I exist, lucky me.

Posted by: Meremortal at January 16, 2012 06:49 PM (Usk3+)

229 If only I had been a democrat like Ted Kennedy, not only would my career survive this, but I would a hero of the international left.

Posted by: Captain Schettino at January 16, 2012 06:50 PM (RfvTE)

230 Put that cowardly mofo in a boat out in the swamp, GATOR style.

Posted by: sifty at January 16, 2012 06:51 PM (WsOiK)

231 I love it there.

I could spend all night writing memories. Summer days, of course -- with the night approaching and the tide going out and these little warm pools of water left behind as the kids splashed in them and didn't want to leave. But also catching the last ferry ride back to Frisco after spending New Years eve on Ocracoke at Howards Pub. No other car on the ferry. So warm we left the moonroof open and fell asleep to the gentle swells of the Atlantic as we passed the inlet. Finding a lot with a decent elevation with a creek deep enough for a 20' Whaler. Flowers still blooming in December. Sitting on the beach eating sandwiches in late November like it was a summer day.

I'm not sure it's true but some have said the things you regret the most in life are not the things you actually do, but the things you don't do. I really, really regret I couldn't move there.

Posted by: Cap'n Crunch at January 16, 2012 06:52 PM (phlKA)

232
"... Captain Schettino had
passed close to the shore to please the ship's head waiter, Antonello
Tievoli, who was from Giglio.
...Captain Schettino called Mr Tievoli to the bridge saying, "Antonello,
come see, we are very close to your Giglio...
Mr Tievoli, standing on the bridge, reportedly
said to the captain just before the accident happened: "Careful, we are
extremely close to the shore".
The waiter knows how to drive a boat better than Captain Skittles.

Posted by: fozzy at January 16, 2012 06:52 PM (FEzSe)

233 That boat may leave a ring around that there ocean.

Posted by: sifty at January 16, 2012 07:12 PM (WsOiK)

234 Hair-raising. I pray for Guam.

Posted by: Rep. Hank Johnson (D) Dumbfuckistan at January 16, 2012 07:28 PM (mG+3t)

235 I wonder if it will come out that whoever was at the helm saved lives by beaching the ship on the rock shore rather than having it sink in open water.

Posted by: Tjexcite at January 16, 2012 07:30 PM (sk1Ym)

236 The interactive map at USA Today says the ship went between the two rocks to the left of the Google long.and lat.

Posted by: sig at January 16, 2012 07:30 PM (0GV9m)

237 Mebee next-a time, we no make-a da ship outta da provolone.

Posted by: Costa Cruiselines Public Relations Dept. at January 16, 2012 07:31 PM (mG+3t)

238 I wonder if half way through the wreck the Captain decided to join the Germans.

Posted by: sifty at January 16, 2012 07:35 PM (WsOiK)

239 16
As far as nautical terminology, I imagine a phrase like 'more or less' is frowned upon.

Okay, I will need eight dollars from you to buy that new keyboard.

Posted by: Boulder Toilet Hobo at January 16, 2012 08:09 PM (QQAJP)

240 I don't get it how are there injured and dead passengers? The ship is sitting in 20 feet of water??!!

Posted by: sonnyspats at January 16, 2012 08:10 PM (kgU8m)

241 WTF happened to watertight integrity???? This is a new modern ship (Crewed, or at least Captained, by an idiot.) Have we learned NOTHING since 1912? Armored Watertight bulkheads below the waterline, Maintain control, counterflood to limit listing, it happened fast BECAUSE NOTHING WAS PREPARED. OMG this is sick!

Posted by: Jno Aubrey at January 16, 2012 08:17 PM (c8mH3)

242 He must have been a veteran of the Italian Army

Posted by: Some Marines at January 16, 2012 08:17 PM (gLAp7)

243 I don't get it how are there injured and dead passengers? The ship is sitting in 20 feet of water??!!
Posted by: sonnyspats at January 16, 2012 08:10 PM (kgU8m)
145'.

Posted by: ErikW at January 16, 2012 08:36 PM (dA8Ib)

244 With 'spect to the Flobots, Handlebars

I can steer this boat with no steering wheel
no steering wheel
no steering wheel
And I can find my way with no GPS
no GPS
no GPS

Look at me, look at me,
I can run this ship while I'm totally
WASTED
and I'm a famous captain
even when the seas're all choppity
I can show you how to stay aliiiiive
I can run a liner into little circles
Just ignore those other losers workin' nine to five
oops. and I can almost get it straight again
I see-a you're a shopper-a
I got tickets to the opera
I know all the words to La Traviata
And some shit that Berlusconi said
Me an' Silvio did a finger cuff
I cannot say which one got the muff
I can do anything that I want cuz, look:

I can see your clothes on my cabin floor
My cabin floor
My cabin fl [CRASH]

I can leave this ship with a blanket on
A blanket on
A blanket on . . .

Posted by: Boulder Toilet Hobo at January 16, 2012 08:41 PM (QQAJP)

245 What do you doooooooooooooo
after you've ruined your life?????

[/channeling Mose Allison]

Posted by: Alaska Paul at January 16, 2012 08:57 PM (rMkgW)

246 I understand the whole going down with the ship attitude, but this wasn't exactly the Titanic where they were a seat on alifeboat was going to mean someone else died. They were so close to the shore that it seems like simply for the sake of coordinating the rescue it would be better handled from the shore than on thesideways ship... just thinking out loud here... the guy could very well have been a complete turd, but just the fact that he went to shore in of itselfdoesn't bother me - what was he doing while on the shore?

Posted by: Andrew at January 16, 2012 09:18 PM (HS3dy)

247 This reminds me of the Honda Point disaster, where seven US Navy destroyers ran agroundin 1923at the point where the California coast bends. The coast is now part of Vandenberg AFB and the crash site is not far from the space launch center there. When I went ou there in 19774, there were still big pieces of the ships lying out in the surf.

Posted by: Tantor at January 17, 2012 12:24 AM (K/+4b)

248 I heard on the radio that he steered the boat closer to shore so the head waiter could wave to his friends on shore!!

Methinks there was serious alcohol involved in that decision.

He killed a bunch of people because he was simply an incompetent asshole. In a socialist country like Italy, it happens all the time. One of our tour guides there said he would marry any one of us, male, female, old, young, just to get the fuck outa there.

Posted by: PJ at January 17, 2012 01:33 AM (DQHjw)

249 Actually I think Shettino is italian for chickenshit

Posted by: Dien Cai Dau at January 17, 2012 01:52 AM (DmsGc)

250 ãäÊÏíÇÊ ÊÓÑíÍÇÊ ãßíÇÌ ÇÒíÇÁ ÝÓÇÊíä ÑÓÇÆá æÓÇÆØ ãÓÌÇÊ ÊæÈíßÇÊ æÙíÝÉ æÙÇÆÝ ÏíßæÑ ÈáÇíÒ ÑÌíã ÑÔÇÞÉ ÍáæíÇÊ ãÚÌäÇÊ äßÊ ÏíßæÑÇÊ ÑãÒíÇÊ ÕæÑ ÑãÒíå ÊæÈíßÇÊ ãáæäå ÕæÑ ÇáÚÇÈ ÎáÝíÇÊ ãíß ÇÈ ÕÈÛÇÊ ááÔÚÑ ÇßÓÓæÇÑÇÊ ßÑæÔíå ÊØÑíÒ ÎíÇØÉ ÊÝÕíá ÇåÏÇÝ ÕæÑ ÛÑíÈÉ Çäãí åíÏÑÇÊ ãÔÇåÏ ÇíÝæä ÌÇáßÓí ÈáÇß ÈíÑí ÈÑæÏßÇÓÊ ÊÕÇãíã íæÊíæÈ ÈË ãÈÇÔÑ ÑÇÈØ äÞá

Posted by: fuad at January 17, 2012 10:01 AM (qv29b)

251 there will be no salvaging of that ship,if they don't get it righted soon the first storm that comes along will break the ship up for them

Posted by: kj at January 17, 2012 01:21 PM (CXpT5)

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