The Morning Rant

"The appearance of this stupid new 'Bulwark' thing is useful insofar as it tells you that the only thing many conservatives think is worth conserving is their own paycheck. Even if you basically have to become fluffers for a left-wing billionaire. It also reminds me of the old adage that the modern world has divided itself into conservatives and progressives. The business of progressives is to go on screwing things up. And it is the business of conservatives is make sure that the screw-ups never get corrected."

(h/t GK Chesterton)

Sacrifices Will Have To Be Made:

Bias All Around:

Run, Joe, Run:

Don't Tell the French:

What Morons Have For Breakfast:

Who Dis:

(I'm probably going to get booed for this one, but dang, she does photograph well. Or you can console yourself by buying some of these.)

And For the 'Ettes:

(Hint: You're probably more familiar with his more famous brother)

Monday's celebrities: Gloria Grahame and Robert Downey Jr.

AoSHQ Weekly Prayer List

For submission guidelines and other relevant info, please contact FenelonSpoke, who is managing the prayer list. You can contact her at

fenelon direction 18 circle 'a' gmail dot com

(All one word, no spaces)

If you see a prayer request posted in a thread comment, feel free to copy and paste it and e-mail it to her.

Answered Prayer:
Donna&&& sister’s PET scan shows no evidence of lung cancer. Thanks for the prayers.

Job Needs:
Kallisto has part-time job. She thanks everybody for prayers. Please continue to pray as she needs a full-time job.
Fenelon asks for prayers that she may be able to get another PT job to help with son’s college expenses. She has an interview Wednesday at 10:00 EST for a non church related position. Prayers would be appreciated.
Fenelon asks for prayers for “D” for a job . May be evicted, and can’t pay his bills.
Patrick and his girlfriend Lisa need jobs. Patrick would like a job as a technical writer or editor. Lisa is looking for a job in business development or business process engineering roles
3/13 Calm Mentor came across a job which meets the job experience which he had done for 15 years. Asked for extra prayers regarding this job.

Updates:
1/30-Backwards Gal is back home after scary medical issues Backwards Boy is having financial issues because of gigs being cancelled. Please pray for that situation as well. Thanks.
2/26-Soc-rat-eeze had surgery for colon issues. No cancer , thank God. Diagnosis of diverticultitis. Needs bowels to get well enough so that colonoscopy can be reversed.
3/3-Olddogin MO-Wife has pancreatic and liver cancer. Was in hospital for a while because of dehydration and food not getting through. May be a candidate for surgery. Please continue to keep her in prayer for complete healing. And skill and wisdom for doctors as they are consulted about treatment
3/6-Notsothoreau asked for prayers for friends’s grandniece ,Zoe who is 7 years old. Zoe had ruptured appendix and colon, but should be able to come home soon with a pic line for medicine. Thanks for prayers so far. Prayer for complete healing for Zoe well as strength for mom who has not left the hospital, dad who used up his sick time and for grandma who has been caring for other three kids
Mrs, Blutarski’s father died February 17th. Prayers for Mrs. B, her mother and the rest of the family and friends
JT’s cousin who had pancreatic cancer has died. Please keep her family and friends in prayer for strength and comfort
3/4-PugMahon’s brother in law Bill’s son has committed suicide. Please keep the family in prayer for strength and comfort after this great loss.

Continuing requests:
-Prayers for rickl tumor has grown. Prayers for complete healing
-Cheribebe asks for “extra prayer boost from horde.” Insurance dragging heels about new chemo treatment and bills are rolling in and finances are snug. Prayers for healing and that situations and insurance may be worked for her benefit.
-Prayers for Slapweasel, Parents have moved in with him. Mom had stroke in June. Dad has demenita and doesn’t know where he is sometimes, Slap is caring for them so he needs prayer as well He also needs a donor for a liver transplant.
-BuckIV need prayer for family of his sister whose husband just died after 5 week battle with cancer.
Buck’s sister also has breast cancer which has metastasized to bones. Also, Buck himself asked for prayers that bladder cancer not progress to worse type.
-Renningantx asked for prayers for his uncle Jimmy who had been cancer free for 12 years but aggressive cancer has returned and he has a doctors apt this week. Prayers for complete healing.
-LadyL asked for prayers for healing for a dear friend, Jean, who has had a recurrence of Mantle Cell Lymphoma, which is an aggressive cancer and hard to treat
-JQ’s father has advanced prostrate cancer and has been having a lot of pain, JQ works full time and so needs to find a place where dad can be cared for.
1/16-Troyrisers mother, Judy has inoperable lung cancer. Please pray for a peaceful passage.
1/16-NorthernLurker needs job or business, sense of direction, and vision and ambition in terms of future occupation.
2/20-Awilda’s son Gabe is in need of a bone marrow transplant

New requests:
1/17- TonyPete asked for prayers for his granddaughters and daughter caught in bad family situation that has no immediate relief. Prayers for them and that daughter might gain wisdom to do good and not harm.
1/29--Mrs. Vic had surgery but it did not close hole in throat. Will need more surgery probably to be scheduled in March, Please keep she and Vic in prayer.
2/1-LadyL asked for prayers for daughter of a friend. After giving birth several weeks ago she had a stroke. She is conscious and has had breathing tube removed ,but has no sensation on one side of her body. Prayers for complete healing
2/8-Tonypete asks for payers for his friend Michele. Michele's daughter eldest daughter died as the result of injuries suffered from a fall on Feb. 5 during a hiking accident. Daughter had four children aged 9-15, Also his friend's youngest daughter was diagnosed with cancer on the same day that the eldest daughter died. Prayers for healing for daughter and strength for Michele and family
2/12-Votermom asked for prayers of healing and help for her friend myiq (who has the Crawfisher blog) and is not getting good care from VA Also asked for prayers for friend Mothy's sister who has 4th stage lung cancer.
2/12-Lin-duh is in need of prayers after the loss of a pregnancy in early stages.
2/12-Anonymous horde member asked for prayers for his community in NH. They had two boys die within 2 weeks. One 12 year old drowned after crossing frozen river on his way home from school. Another boy. age 14, committed suicide within two weeks of death of first boy. Families and friends and community are in shock and hurting. Horde member asked for prayer that the Lord God would send down Holy Spirit and bring comfort and healing
2/12-SMH reports that his daughter is "travelling down a dark path and taking children with her." SMH asks that her daughter's heart of stone be turned to flesh and that she receive conversion to accept Jesus as Lord
2/17 Prayers for-Jewell’s grandson’s wife-Carmen, who is in rehab for alcoholism and has a 1 year old child. She may be suffering from post-partum depression. Prayers for healing and recovery and for Jewell’s grandson and great-grandchild.
2/24-Navymom asked for prayers for grandson who looks skinny and not as well cared for as he might be.
2/24 prayers of Complete healing needed for Nora Elizabeth, great niece of Mrs. Leggy. Nora Elizabeth is a baby has brain tumors and will need a year of chemo at the least
2/26 Josephistan asked for prayers for his mom who has anxiety and of behavioral issues
3/4-Prayers for people in AL affected by tornado
3/7-Shibumi and Bozo Conservative newly married. Need rough places made smooth so that they can live together.
3/8-Theresa in FortWorth has a cyst on kidney. Was being referred to a nephrologist as a priority patient.
3/10-CaptainJosephaSabin had emergency pacemaker installed. Is now having dialysis Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. It is very difficult. Might be able to discontinue dialysis. Prayers for end to panic attacks and complete healing.
3/10-KTY healing from stomach virus and tenacious fever.
3/12-TonyPete’s wife is having rheumatology and neurology issues. Praying for a lessening of painful, difficult symptoms and a way forward with doctors.
3/12-NorthernLurker needs money and job. Also asks for prayer in area of new relationships. Niece’s son, Josh, needs healing. Very troubled boy with numerous behavioral issues . Pray also that authorities do what is right for the family.
3/13-MPPPP, prayers that someone’s heart be softened and that reconciliation will take place.
3/13-Bicentennial Guy, mom and dad’s pug dog is very ill, has returning cancer. Has to be put down next week. Prayers for comfort and strength for his mom and dad and blaster who gave them the pug.
3/13-Josephistan, prayers for mom’s recovery and peace of mind and for strength for Josephistan so he can take care of her.
3/13-Blaster asks for prayers for his 17 year old son and 13 year old daughter who are depressed, anxious, and not doing well in school Blaster’s son won’t talk to him. For healing and help for Blaster and children.
3/13-Vic mentioned that he might have to go back in hospital for “same issues he had last year.” Prayers for Vic and family

Wednesdays are days in which mothers in the horde and anyone else says special prayers for children of horde members

I have not heard from cjjr who had brain cancer and asked for prayers. It worries me when I don’t hear from people.

Please feel free to copy requests which you see on the board and send them to me. I am unable to be on
the board all the time, even though it seems like I am, and so if people don’t tell me about prayer requests I may have no way of knowing. Thx and God bless! FenelonDirection18 at gmail dot com

Please remember the Prayer of St. Francis:

http://www.prayerguide.org.uk/stfrancis.htm

Today's Edition Of The Morning Rant Is Brought To You By Steak and Fries:

(h/t, as usual, to Food Porn on Twitter)

Posted by: OregonMuse at 11:15 AM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Monkey time!

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:09 AM (so+oy)

2 That's a good looking steak!

Is that Jane Fonda??

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:10 AM (so+oy)

3 Jane Fonda!....well she was a looker at one time.

Posted by: BignJames at March 13, 2019 11:10 AM (ykq7q)

4 I better call the corgies..

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:11 AM (so+oy)

5 Jane Fonda

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at March 13, 2019 11:11 AM (wYseH)

6 Yup, it's Jane Fonda. Booooo.

Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:11 AM (TpAxy)

7 Sponge

Posted by: FIRST!!!!! at March 13, 2019 11:11 AM (d8iVQ)

8 Please tell me blonde with the points doesn't have French armpit hair.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:11 AM (bcbK8)

9 mmmm, steak and boobehs...

life would be good if I had more of that.

Posted by: SturmToddler at March 13, 2019 11:11 AM (8D42x)

10 What, no sponge!

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 11:11 AM (uSoVh)

11 Jane Fonda.

It's RDJ from Finding Neverland in the GIF.

No idea who the metro is.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 11:12 AM (fuK7c)

12 Slow on the trigger. Missed out on being in the top ten.

Posted by: engineer at March 13, 2019 11:12 AM (R5QBF)

13 Not fast enough

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 11:12 AM (uSoVh)

14 I think that self-driving Tesla actually ploughed into a semi trailer because it was white.

So...diversity?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:12 AM (bcbK8)

15 Willowed, because we have a serious ear worm emergency!

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me. We kindle and char and in flame and ignite. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We burn up the city, we're really a fright. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho.

ARRRGGGHHH! Make it stop!
Posted by: Anonymous White Male at March 13, 2019 11:01 AM (3sjI6)

Brandy, you're a fine girl, what a good wife you would be!

- eh, that's all I've got.
Posted by: Tom Servo

"I love you, you love me
We're a happy family"

"It's a small world after all,
It's a small world after all,"

"Puff the magic dragon lived by the sea"

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:12 AM (LHT0w)

16 As long as you're posting commie traitor pictures, I hear that Ethel Rosenberg was quite the looker.

Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM (TpAxy)

17 I turn away for one moment to try a limerick, and the ape jumps in. Wouldn't you know it.

Weeping willowed words
Weeping willowed words
Bend your... never mind.

Posted by: mindful webworker - how now kowtow at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM (jMD9L)

18 Jane Fonda is living proof that you don't have to like a girl to want to fuck her.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM (bcbK8)

19 Mr. Muse Chesterton is timeless!

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (uSoVh)

20 The dude pic is of the guy who can't drive fast.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (LHT0w)

21 I remember seeing her in Barberella at the drive-in with my high school buds.. hubbala hubbala..

This would be before her trip to Hanoi, I believe..

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (so+oy)

22 Paul Walker

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (LHT0w)

23 Good luck on the job hunt, Calm Mentor.

Posted by: Dr. T at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (4kNoB)

24 11 Jane Fonda.

It's RDJ from Finding Neverland in the GIF.

No idea who the metro is.
Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 11:12 AM (fuK7c)

Wasn't Johnny Depp in Finding Neverland?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (bcbK8)

25 6 Yup, it's Jane Fonda. Booooo.
Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:11 AM (TpAxy)

Thank you. Now buy some of those targets and get some practice in.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (h1Jye)

26 23 Good luck on the job hunt, Calm Mentor.
Posted by: Dr. T at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (4kNoB)

Seconded!!

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (bcbK8)

27 14
I think that self-driving Tesla actually ploughed into a semi trailer because it was white.

So...diversity?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:12 AM (bcbK

Self driving cars with pedestrian avoidance systems are gonna suck in the zombie apocalypse.

Gonna be fun when the Gov says no more driving for U!

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (ymnmz)

28
Yeah, it's definitely Hanoi Jane.

* unzips and prepares to pee on monitor *

* thinks better of it *

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (jYje5)

29 22 Paul Walker
Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (LHT0w)

Close.

But that was who the hint was pointing you at.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 11:15 AM (h1Jye)

30 And Pork and Beans is lunch food.

It is known.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:15 AM (bcbK8)

31 Dude looks a little like Paul Walker. His brother?

Posted by: engineer at March 13, 2019 11:15 AM (R5QBF)

32 They're really pushing Biden?? Do none of these people have memories beyond yesterday?

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at March 13, 2019 11:15 AM (BmG3e)

33 Unicorn armpit hair.....any suggestions for ear hair...for us older peeps?

Posted by: BignJames at March 13, 2019 11:15 AM (ykq7q)

34 Willard

276 Serious question--what actual law was broken in these academic bribery scandals?

I'm guessing that there could be laws that cover the public institutions, but what about the private ones?
Posted by: TexasDan at March 13, 2019 11:06 AM (yL25O)

Tax fraud among others. This was done through a "charity."

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 11:16 AM (9VeU0)

35 Also, not to comment on your blogging skills, OM -- but I'm commenting on your blogging skills -- you go to all the trouble to invert images and make google image search and other forms of cheating difficult...

and then you hotlink something where the url says "Hanoi Jane".

I got it without looking at that link or hovering over the url so I'm first because I assume all the rapscallions who beat me cheated.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 11:16 AM (fuK7c)

36 Unicorn armpit hair.....any suggestions for ear hair...for us older peeps?
Posted by: BignJames

Nose hair art.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:16 AM (LHT0w)

37 Like man buns, I think that unicorn armpit hair, as well as weird colored hair in females is really helpful. It says "don't interact with me, or even think of dating me, I'm batshit crazy." Sort of like a visual STOP sign.

Posted by: shibumi, recently married at March 13, 2019 11:16 AM (6vFO7)

38 27 14
I think that self-driving Tesla actually ploughed into a semi trailer because it was white.

So...diversity?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:12 AM (bcbK

Self driving cars with pedestrian avoidance systems are gonna suck in the zombie apocalypse.

Gonna be fun when the Gov says no more driving for U!
Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (ymnmz)

See, this is why I'm keeping my 2011 BMW forever. I don't WANT anyone determining how I drive or if I drive.

I love technology, but I keep my eyes open. This is America, not Bangkok.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:17 AM (bcbK8)

39 oh I thought the girl was Melanie Griffith. Is the guy Emilio Estevez?

Posted by: kallisto at March 13, 2019 11:17 AM (jmIQu)

40 31 Dude looks a little like Paul Walker. His brother?
Posted by: engineer at March 13, 2019 11:15 AM (R5QBF)

Yes.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 11:17 AM (h1Jye)

41 I don't see any unicorns!

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at March 13, 2019 11:17 AM (xfb67)

42
I have lane departure self correction in my Rav. It works great some of the time when it can see the road. I wouldn't dare attempt to use it on a salted down or snow covered road.

Unless I wanted my heirs to win a big settlement from Toyota.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:17 AM (jYje5)

43 39 oh I thought the girl was Melanie Griffith. Is the guy Emilio Estevez?

Posted by: kallisto at March 13, 2019 11:17 AM (jmIQu)

No.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 11:17 AM (h1Jye)

44 Close.

But that was who the hint was pointing you at.
Posted by: OregonMuse

Caleb or Cody then. Not sure which.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:17 AM (LHT0w)

45 Ear Dreads.

Posted by: Burger Chef at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (RuIsu)

46 Good luck on the job hunt, Calm Mentor.
Posted by: Dr. T at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (4kNoB)

Seconded!!
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:14 AM (bcbK

--------------------------

Thank you both!

Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (ffYR/)

47 I got it without looking at that link or hovering over the url so I'm first because I assume all the rapscallions who beat me cheated.
Posted by: Bandersnatch

You assume wrong. Any Boomer should recognize and loathe her on sight.

Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (TpAxy)

48 1. Yes, Hanoi Jane is a traitor but as Barbarella reveals, she was a hot traitor.

2. I've had pork and beans out of a can for breakfast. Cold. College is expensive.

3. I would have steak and fries three meals a day if my digestive tract were up to the task.

4. The guy is almost familiar. Almost.

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (RD7QR)

49 18
Jane Fonda is living proof that you don't have to like a girl to want to fuck her.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM (bcbK

From "War of the Roses"
Oliver (Michael Douglas) :"Have you ever had angry sex?" (referring to sex with Kathleen Turner's character Barbara Rose)

Gavin (Danny DeVito) "Is there any other kind?"

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (jxbfJ)

50 Serious question--what actual law was broken in these academic bribery scandals? "

That *is* a good question - I decided to look it up. Here's a page with a chart of the actual charges filed:

https://tinyurl.com/y48f2xpr

Primarily mail fraud, wire fraud, and racketeering, backed up by conspiracy to commit all three.

That chart tells us why this broke open now - two of the defendants on the top of the list have already plead guilty. Obviously they've turned States Evidence against everyone else, which is why the Feds let the info go public.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (Kpl3J)

51 >>30 And Pork and Beans is lunch food.
It is known. Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:15 AM (bcbK

A container of pork-and-beans was mated with leftover Szechuan beef and eaten as breakfast yesterday. With Colman's mustard.

Beautifully mutated.

Posted by: Zod at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (Bdeb0)

52 My cousin was a POW for over 6 years. So yeah...fuvk Fonda.

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (0tfLf)

53
Thank you. Now buy some of those targets and get some practice in.
Posted by: OregonMuse

.................

They still put those Hanoi Jane stickers in the urinals at the American Legion hall I go to for Karaoke..

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (so+oy)

54 Wasn't Johnny Depp in Finding Neverland?

Shit. I meant Johnny Depp. OM wrote that the last celebs were someone and RDJ and it just ate a hole in my subconscious.

I meant to say Johnny Depp. I was thinking Johnny Depp.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (fuK7c)

55 49 18
Jane Fonda is living proof that you don't have to like a girl to want to fuck her.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM (bcbK

From "War of the Roses"
Oliver (Michael Douglas) :"Have you ever had angry sex?" (referring to sex with Kathleen Turner's character Barbara Rose)

Gavin (Danny DeVito) "Is there any other kind?"

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (jxbfJ)

Wisdom.

And sadness, but wisdom.

Sigh. I miss being single.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:19 AM (bcbK8)

56 Like man buns, I think that unicorn armpit hair, as well as weird colored hair in females is really helpful. It says "don't interact with me, or even think of dating me, I'm batshit crazy." Sort of like a visual STOP sign.

Posted by: shibumi, recently married at March 13, 2019 11:16 AM (6vFO7)

Like brightly colored insects....or tree frogs...POISON!

Posted by: BignJames at March 13, 2019 11:19 AM (ykq7q)

57 Like man buns, I think that unicorn armpit hair, as well as weird colored hair in females is really helpful. It says "don't interact with me, or even think of dating me, I'm batshit crazy." Sort of like a visual STOP sign.
Posted by: shibumi

For those who blow right past the verbal clues.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:19 AM (LHT0w)

58 51 >>30 And Pork and Beans is lunch food.
It is known. Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:15 AM (bcbK

A container of pork-and-beans was mated with leftover Szechuan beef and eaten as breakfast yesterday. With Colman's mustard.

Beautifully mutated.
Posted by: Zod at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (Bdeb0)

You know, honestly, I'd eat that. Sounds tasty.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:19 AM (bcbK8)

59 I had no idea Paul Walker had a lookalike brother.

Posted by: Jordan61 at March 13, 2019 11:20 AM (QBy2Q)

60 37
Like man buns, I think that unicorn armpit hair, as well as weird
colored hair in females is really helpful. It says "don't interact with
me, or even think of dating me, I'm batshit crazy." Sort of like a
visual STOP sign.

Posted by: shibumi, recently married at March 13, 2019 11:16 AM (6vFO7)
Man buns, aka twat knots. I've already instructed my daughter if she brings home a potential suitor that has a twat knot, I'll greet him at the door with shears. He doesn't come in until that thing comes off.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 11:20 AM (jxbfJ)

61
I got it without looking at that link or hovering over the url so I'm first because I assume all the rapscallions who beat me cheated.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 11:16 AM

You honestly couldn't see her face? Confirmation to me was the ''I'm probably going to get booed for this one...''. But I knew the face right away.

Hate improves memory or something.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:20 AM (jYje5)

62 I love poison dart frogs. Did you know you can get them for pets. Apparently, they are not poisonous unless they eat a certain insect.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at March 13, 2019 11:20 AM (xfb67)

63 >>It says "don't interact with me, or even think of dating me, I'm batshit crazy." Sort of like a visual STOP sign. Posted by: shibumi

"Psycho plumage," in the vernacular.

Posted by: Zod at March 13, 2019 11:20 AM (Bdeb0)

64 LOL Little Ben is a little scared that the CEO wants to ban Ben Shapiro. Via Tim Pool or Timcast

Posted by: Patrick from Ohio at March 13, 2019 11:20 AM (dKiJG)

65 I think that self-driving Tesla actually ploughed into a semi trailer because it was white.

That Uber test vehicle down in Arizona was a marvel. You have a white tweaker pushing a bicycle across a four-lane highway in the middle of the night and along comes the Uber Volvo with its Hispanic tranny driver checking Facebook...

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:21 AM (8erNz)

66 Poor man lunch:
1 can pork and beans
2 hotdogs, diced into 1" chunks
1 tsp ketchup
1 tsp mustard
1 tsp BBQ sauce

Combine, microwave for 90 seconds on High, stir and eat. Season with tears to taste.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:21 AM (bcbK8)

67 Because Horde people know about weird things, here's Jane Fonda by Mickey Avalon.

Probably NSFW or for people with standards or musical taste.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2xdKuhYaW_0

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 11:21 AM (gCzjH)

68 Is that Vox thing for realsies?
Are people that dumb?

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:21 AM (0tfLf)

69 Porn and beans somehow does not sound like a good combo.

Unless it's a very well-ventilated room. Not even then, really.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at March 13, 2019 11:21 AM (fqUgw)

70 Bless you Fenelon for your tireless work

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 11:21 AM (uSoVh)

71 50
Serious question--what actual law was broken in these academic bribery scandals? "

That *is* a good question - I decided to look it up. Here's a page with a chart of the actual charges filed:

https://tinyurl.com/y48f2xpr

Primarily mail fraud, wire fraud, and racketeering, backed up by conspiracy to commit all three.

That chart tells us why this broke open now - two of the defendants
on the top of the list have already plead guilty. Obviously they've
turned States Evidence against everyone else, which is why the Feds let
the info go public.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:18 AM (Kpl3J)
Since these are Division I schools, you would think the NCAA would be swooping in on this as well.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (jxbfJ)

72 The CEO of YouTube wants to ban Little Ben

Posted by: Patrick from Ohio at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (dKiJG)

73 The male pic is of Cody Walker.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (LHT0w)

74 35 Also, not to comment on your blogging skills, OM -- but I'm commenting on your blogging skills -- you go to all the trouble to invert images and make google image search and other forms of cheating difficult...

I've actually stopped doing the invert because it simply doesn't fool the Google image search.

and then you hotlink something where the url says "Hanoi Jane".

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 11:16 AM (fuK7c)

Well, I figured her identity would be guessed almost immediately so I thought I'd have a little fun by showing everyone the urinal targets. Were you not entertained?

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (h1Jye)

75 65 I think that self-driving Tesla actually ploughed into a semi trailer because it was white.

That Uber test vehicle down in Arizona was a marvel. You have a white tweaker pushing a bicycle across a four-lane highway in the middle of the night and along comes the Uber Volvo with its Hispanic tranny driver checking Facebook...
Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:21 AM (8erNz)

And the accident killed both? Yes? Please?

I love happy endings...

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (bcbK8)

76 Oh, and the problem with self-driving cars and people of color is probably that the latter walk more than other citizens and are more likely to do so in complicated traffic situations. I doubt Tesla's algorithm is secretly in the Klan.

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (RD7QR)

77 Are people that dumb?
Posted by: Diogenes

Have you learned nothing here, Padawan?

Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (TpAxy)

78 I had no idea Paul Walker had a lookalike brother.
Posted by: Jordan61

.................

They brought in his brothers to finish the film he was shooting when he died.

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (so+oy)

79 Man buns, aka twat knots. I've already instructed my daughter if she brings home a potential suitor that has a twat knot, I'll greet him at the door with shears. He doesn't come in until that thing comes off.

My nephew's got one. I don't understand the appeal. Of course I also don't understand the appeal of the 1850s facial hair that seems to be back in vogue among some men, either. I hate shaving, but I hate having a beard more.

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:23 AM (8erNz)

80 Is the HQ super slow loading for anyone else today?

Posted by: Muad'dib at March 13, 2019 11:23 AM (sjdRT)

81

Many thanks for including us on The Prayer List, FenelonSpoke. All y'all's prayers are greatly appreciated.

Teh Horde is the bestest.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy says #PurgeProgressivism at March 13, 2019 11:23 AM (HaL55)

82 72 The CEO of YouTube wants to ban Little Ben
Posted by: Patrick from Ohio at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (dKiJG)

Fascists are all about controlling who speaks and says what.

There is only one cure, one our forefathers knew and practiced on America's last big European vacation.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:23 AM (bcbK8)

83 Oh, and the problem with self-driving cars and people of color is probably that the latter walk more than other citizens

Having driven a LOT in Philly the problem is they just seem to like to dart out into traffic in the middle of the block from behind box trucks all the damn time

Posted by: BlackOrchid at March 13, 2019 11:23 AM (Rarvo)

84 Oh my goodness does that steak look good.

Posted by: Cory Booker at March 13, 2019 11:23 AM (LISuA)

85 79
Man buns, aka twat knots. I've already instructed my daughter if she
brings home a potential suitor that has a twat knot, I'll greet him at
the door with shears. He doesn't come in until that thing comes off.

My nephew's got one. I don't understand the appeal. Of course I
also don't understand the appeal of the 1850s facial hair that seems to
be back in vogue among some men, either. I hate shaving, but I hate
having a beard more.

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:23 AM (8erNz)
Beards I don't mind. Been wearing one for 25 years or so. Except for pictures, my daughter has never seen me without one.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 11:24 AM (jxbfJ)

86 Oh, and the problem with self-driving cars and people of color is probably that the latter walk more than other citizens and are more likely to do so in complicated traffic situations. I doubt Tesla's algorithm is secretly in the Klan.
Posted by: joncelli
............

And.. I think black people are taught never to cross a street at the light or the corner..

Anyone else ever noticed that?

I don't think it is racist.. just an observation..

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:24 AM (so+oy)

87 41 I don't see any unicorns!

.....

***pulls pants pockets out***

See. These are its ears.

You want to see it's horn?

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 11:24 AM (gCzjH)

88 62 I love poison dart frogs. Did you know you can get them for pets. Apparently, they are not poisonous unless they eat a certain insect.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at March 13, 2019 11:20 AM (xfb67)

Nature is awesome.

Posted by: Jordan61 at March 13, 2019 11:24 AM (QBy2Q)

89 73 The male pic is of Cody Walker.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (LHT0w)

Yes! Congrats, you're the first.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (h1Jye)

90 And.. I think black people are taught never to cross a street at the light or the corner..

it does seem so

Posted by: BlackOrchid at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (Rarvo)

91 76 Oh, and the problem with self-driving cars and people of color is probably that the latter walk more than other citizens and are more likely to do so in complicated traffic situations. I doubt Tesla's algorithm is secretly in the Klan.

Yeah, but traffic-light-panhandler clearance and riot avoidance are useful skills to build into software regardless.

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (8erNz)

92 Since these are Division I schools, you would think the NCAA would be swooping in on this as well."

You would think, since apparently there's a fair number of Coaches and Athletic Directors involved in it. This is worse than what LSU's Basketball coach just got booted for.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (Kpl3J)

93 Oh, look who woke up:

"Republicans Plan Outreach to Women Ahead of 2020"

This is Daniels big foray?

Posted by: Marcus T at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (VpIIl)

94
Something else I've noticed about Hanoi Jane and other older women who have exercised a lot... they age slower and time is kinder on their faces.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (jYje5)

95
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me. We kindle and char and in flame and ignite. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We burn up the city, we're really a fright. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho.

ARRRGGGHHH! Make it stop!
Posted by: Anonymous White Male at March 13, 2019 11:01 AM (3sjI6)

Brandy, you're a fine girl, what a good wife you would be!

- eh, that's all I've got.
Posted by: Tom Servo

"I love you, you love me
We're a happy family"

"It's a small world after all,
It's a small world after all,"

"Puff the magic dragon lived by the sea"

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:12 AM (LHT0w)

Mah-nah-ma-nah,
do doo do do,
Mah-nah-ma-nah,
do do do do, Mah-nah-ma-nah!!

Posted by: SturmToddler at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (8D42x)

96 Call me what you will but I will take a good Country Fried Steak with hashbrowns and gravy anytime

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (uSoVh)

97 They brought in his brothers to finish the film he was shooting when he died.
______________

Yeah, I remember reading that at the time, but I wasn't aware of how similar they looked. Eerie.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (fqUgw)

98 NCAA will most likely be implicated, either in this, or in the investigations that stemmed from this.

This is just the beginning.

Posted by: BlackOrchid at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (Rarvo)

99 >>You want to see it's horn?

What a shame, it looks like the poachers sawed most of it off.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (/tuJf)

100 They brought in his brothers to finish the film he was shooting when he died.

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (so+oy)

Interesting, I didn't know that.

Posted by: Jordan61 at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (QBy2Q)

101 Prayers up for all the horde. May God hold you close to His heart.

Booooo Jane Fonda. Traitor. May she rot in hell burning in eternity. She is a disgusting piece of garbage. (but, TBH, she is a looker in that pic).

Where are MY targets? Huh?

Posted by: Charlotte the sailor at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (APMW0)

102 82 72 The CEO of YouTube wants to ban Little Ben

Posted by: Patrick from Ohio at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (dKiJG)

So do I. Little prick. I've always wanted to be part of an outrage mob.

Say, what are we banning him for?

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (h1Jye)

103 94
Something else I've noticed about Hanoi Jane and other older women who have exercised a lot... they age slower and time is kinder on their faces.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (jYje5)

Yoga and Aerobics does wonders for MILFs

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (bcbK8)

104 30 And Pork and Beans is lunch food.

you need to look at more closely at the advert.

Posted by: Anachronda at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (sGtp+)

105 93
Oh, look who woke up:

"Republicans Plan Outreach to Women Ahead of 2020"

This is Daniels big foray?

Posted by: Marcus T at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (VpIIl)
How about the Republicans focus on doing what WE sent them to do.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (jxbfJ)

106 What a shame, it looks like the poachers sawed most of it off.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (/tuJf)
......

LOL!

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (gCzjH)

107 So the FBI recommended charges against Hillary and guess what--I dindu nuffin.'

Posted by: Loretta Lynch at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (hjaPQ)

108 BREAKING: A spokeswoman for Bernie Sanders' presidential campaign posted anti-Semitic conspiracy theories on her Facebook account, stating that the "American Jewish community has a dual allegiance to the state of Israel"

-
And what of the matzah balls?!

She took down the post so it's all good.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 11:27 AM (+y/Ru)

109 Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (h1Jye)

Are you going to give Bander a participation trophy?...
'cause I want one, too.

Posted by: BignJames at March 13, 2019 11:27 AM (ykq7q)

110 Self Driving cars hit black people.

Can they do illegal aliens and jihadi's? Maybe self driving cars on the southern border are the answer.

Posted by: The Walking Dude at March 13, 2019 11:27 AM (cCxiu)

111 I'm guessing that there could be laws that cover the public institutions, but what about the private ones?
Posted by: TexasDan at March 13, 2019 11:06 AM (yL25O)

Tax fraud among others. This was done through a "charity."
Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 11:16 AM (9VeU0)

to elaborate, Singer, the perpetrator, set up a fake 501c3 for these parents to "donate" and then he used the money out of it to bribe coaches, pay test takers, etc. Meanwhile, the parents were taking tax deductions for their donations. That's why the IRS is involved. Most of the donations were in the $200,000-$400,000 range, one CEO "donated" $1.5 M. Big payments, and big deductions. That they knew were going to a sham charity for the purpose of defrauding and bribing.

the ACT and SAT testing services are the standard college entrance exam across the country. This guy was able to have tests "corrected' , tests taken by ringers who were not the students, etc. That in itself is a huge issue, one that is still being investigated.

The NCAA will be involved because coaches were lying to the athletic departments in saying that some of these students were "recruits" which allowed them to receive fully paid trips to the colleges to be "recruited" for athletic teams. They weren't offered scholarships per the DOJ atty. yesterday, but were accepted into the college because of the coach had offered them a place on the teams( Stanford sailing team,, Yale women's soccer) . All fraudulent, the Yale soccer player had never played a single competitive game of soccer in her life.

Posted by: Jen the original at March 13, 2019 11:27 AM (nInlj)

112 And.. I think black people are taught never to cross a street at the light or the corner..

Anyone else ever noticed that?

I don't think it is racist.. just an observation..
Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:24 AM (so+oy)

---------------------------

They must also be taught to walk right in the middle of the parking lot driving lanes at the same time.

Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 11:27 AM (ffYR/)

113 103
94

Something else I've noticed about Hanoi Jane and other older women
who have exercised a lot... they age slower and time is kinder on their
faces.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (jYje5)

Yoga and Aerobics does wonders for MILFs

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (bcbK

Just one more reason to go to the gym.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 11:27 AM (jxbfJ)

114 Since these are Division I schools, you would think the NCAA would be swooping in on this as well."

You would think, since apparently there's a fair number of Coaches and Athletic Directors involved in it. This is worse than what LSU's Basketball coach just got booted for.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM

But...a sailing team???
A sailing team???!!!

They have a sailing team??? WTF!!!!

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:27 AM (0tfLf)

115 Better to light one candle than to curse the darkness.

Leno Blasts Late-Night Comics Who Deploy 'One-Sided' Politics Without 'Civility'

-
Leno has all the money in the world (plus a packed garage) so he doesn't need it but I like that he's playing a grease monkey on Last Man Standing.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 11:27 AM (+y/Ru)

116 Something else I've noticed about Hanoi Jane and other older women who
have exercised a lot... they age slower and time is kinder on their
faces.

--

Yeah, I'm going to wade in and say "she has good genes that make her look younger," rather than give credit to "exercise."

Posted by: shibumi, recently married at March 13, 2019 11:28 AM (6vFO7)

117 Is that Vox thing for real? It can't be. I refused to live in this fucking world anymore if it is.

Posted by: Lurking Lurker at March 13, 2019 11:28 AM (eZuvF)

118 94
Something else I've noticed about Hanoi Jane and other older women who have exercised a lot... they age slower and time is kinder on their faces.
__________________

Fonda's face is less due to exercise and more to the skills of her plastic surgeons. Same for Sophia Loren and other oldies.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at March 13, 2019 11:28 AM (fqUgw)

119 90 And.. I think black people are taught never to cross a street at the light or the corner..

it does seem so
Posted by: BlackOrchid at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (Rarvo)

Same damn thing happened to me yesterday in Everett. I was very tempted to not swerve to miss him. Seems like every week some idiot in Everett gets hit by a car crossing Hwy 99 on foot.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:29 AM (bcbK8)

120 The advert reads Porn and Beans though...

Yeah, I've had that for breakfast too.

Posted by: GnuBreed at March 13, 2019 11:29 AM (Z4rgH)

121 91 76 Oh, and the problem with self-driving cars and people of color is probably that the latter walk more than other citizens and are more likely to do so in complicated traffic situations. I doubt Tesla's algorithm is secretly in the Klan.

Yeah, but traffic-light-panhandler clearance and riot avoidance are useful skills to build into software regardless.

OBVIOUSLY the ANSWER is Affirmative Automobile Action! Self Driving Cars need to have a Point System built in which compensates for this tendency to hit Black People, by awarding the Vehicle Operator for 25 points for every White Man struck, 40 points for every White Women, and a whopping 75 points for every elderly white person with a walker!

Posted by: Frankenstein the Champion at March 13, 2019 11:29 AM (Kpl3J)

122 I'm gonna dissent with the good ole gang here, but I just don't see Jane Fonda, in her younger years, being all that good looking. Passable? Yeah. Beautiful? Not a chance. If it weren't for her father, she would've been at the bottom of the barrel in terms of the beautiful women who paraded through Hollywood in that era.

Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun at March 13, 2019 11:29 AM (JoUsr)

123 117 Is that Vox thing for real? It can't be. I refused to live in this fucking world anymore if it is.
Posted by: Lurking Lurker at March 13, 2019 11:28 AM (eZuvF)

Get back here. You're not leaving before me.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:29 AM (bcbK8)

124 Before she became Hanoi Jane, she was just a well-connected, pudgy faced ingenue.

That was even before my time!

Posted by: Pete in Texas at March 13, 2019 11:30 AM (MCvl4)

125 NCAA will most likely be implicated, either in this, or in the investigations that stemmed from this.

This is just the beginning.
Posted by: BlackOrchid at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (Rarvo)

Uh, no. The NCAA will be given a report from the FBI/DOJ and will work with them to ascertain exactly what happened. The NCAA then will determine what sanctions will occur at it's member schools whose coaches participated in this.
The NCAA didn't perpetuate this.

Posted by: Jen the original at March 13, 2019 11:30 AM (nInlj)

126
Jane Fonda!....well she was a looker at one time.

Posted by: BignJames

---

Oh, so close. That is "hooker". See Klute.

Posted by: Tonypete at March 13, 2019 11:30 AM (gNADb)

127 Beards I don't mind. Been wearing one for 25 years or so. Except for pictures, my daughter has never seen me without one.

Sherman, set the wayback machine for 1974 I think.

My brother grew a beard, he was quite fond of it. He actually looked fairly decent in it but it was a bit, uh, luxuriant. Our father hated it, and took to calling him 'weirdy beardy' behind his back.

One year, my brother and his family came over for dad's birthday. Dad didn't notice bro was visibly different until, several hours later (after a game of chess if I recall), my brother handed my father an envelope containing...

Bro grew back the mustache but not the beard and not a word was ever said thereafter.

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:30 AM (8erNz)

128 I want a self-driving car with a self-leaning horn.

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 11:30 AM (m45I2)

129 122 I'm gonna dissent with the good ole gang here, but I just don't see Jane Fonda, in her younger years, being all that good looking. Passable? Yeah. Beautiful? Not a chance. If it weren't for her father, she would've been at the bottom of the barrel in terms of the beautiful women who paraded through Hollywood in that era.
Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun at March 13, 2019 11:29 AM (JoUsr)

Eh. Everyone has their preferences. You can't convince someone is good looking.

But she's got/had good proportions, skin/body tone and bone structure.

She's just moral sewage.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (bcbK8)

130 What a shame, it looks like the poachers sawed most of it off.

Posted by: JackStraw

Dayuuuumm.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (LHT0w)

131 I wonder if a self driving car would maneuver to avoid Brie Larson's flat ass.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (xfb67)

132 Instagram and Unicorn Armpit Hair is proof positive that modern culture is full of stupid, stupid, self-absorbed idiot people.

Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (JoUsr)

133 FIRST!!!!!

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (9gDA7)

134 91 76 Oh, and the problem with self-driving cars and people of color is probably that the latter walk more than other citizens and are more likely to do so in complicated traffic situations. I doubt Tesla's algorithm is secretly in the Klan.

Yeah, but traffic-light-panhandler clearance and riot avoidance are useful skills to build into software regardless.
Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (8erNz)

Well, then Uber and Tesla need to get cracking on the armored turret add-ons. Ball's going up any day now.

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (RD7QR)

135 Had to finish reading comments on the last thread.

Quite an outburst of limericking, which devolved into earworming. Amusing.

Muldoon? Appreciate the blowback on landlubbering.

Okay, gonna see what the ape is ranting... before the ewok awakens...

Posted by: mindful webworker - not here yet at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (jMD9L)

136 Well, Jen, I hope that's the case!

But honestly? They are on top of every detail regarding every recruit.

They missed all this?!?

And this was the ONLY nonprofit company profiting off of abusing Title IX's gender balance reading? REALLY?

Posted by: BlackOrchid at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (Rarvo)

137 VOX is a stupidity wrapped in ignorance surrounded by dumb.

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable and Profoundly Unserious at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (pw+jk)

138 Has anyone ever asked the pertinent question? Why the fuck do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?

Posted by: JoeF. at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (NFEMn)

139 Is it any accident we are seeing a reference to cows farting and porn and beans in the same posting???

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (0tfLf)

140 Sorry, but don't cut my steak for me. I'll take care of that myself, thank you.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (9gDA7)

141 I don't know Paul or Cody Walker.

Posted by: kallisto at March 13, 2019 11:32 AM (jmIQu)

142
Nah. I think it has to do more with working up a good sweat and cleaning out the facial pores on a regular basis.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:32 AM (jYje5)

143 Self driving cars will be great. Just think of all the extra masturbation time that will create.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at March 13, 2019 11:32 AM (xfb67)

144 Seems to me, of the photographed, the wrong one is dead.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:32 AM (9gDA7)

145 Has anyone ever asked the pertinent question? Why the fuck do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?

Millennials don't like driving

Posted by: BlackOrchid at March 13, 2019 11:32 AM (Rarvo)

146 I'm batshit crazy." Sort of like a visual STOP sign.
Posted by: shibumi, recently married at March 13, 2019 11:16 AM (6vFO7)

Unfortunately it is the considerably more prevalent unseen crazy which is more concerning

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 11:32 AM (uSoVh)

147 139 Is it any accident we are seeing a reference to cows farting and porn and beans in the same posting???
_________________

This is about us, isn't?

Posted by: Lena Dunham and Amy Schumer at March 13, 2019 11:33 AM (fqUgw)

148 I wonder if a self driving car would maneuver to avoid Brie Larson's flat ass.
Posted by: sniffybigtoe at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (xfb67)

If one ran over it, would it know?

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:33 AM (9gDA7)

149 Is that Vox thing for real? It can't be. I refused to live in this fucking world anymore if it is.
Posted by: Lurking Lurker at March 13, 2019 11:28 AM (eZuvF)

Get back here. You're not leaving before me.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards

FTS! I was born here.
THEY can get right the fuck off.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:33 AM (LHT0w)

150 104 30 And Pork and Beans is lunch food.

you need to look at more closely at the advert.
Posted by: Anachronda at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (sGtp+)

I stand by my statement.

Though porn in the morning is fun.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:33 AM (bcbK8)

151 143 Self driving cars will be great. Just think of all the extra masturbation time that will create.
______________

More time for porn and beans!

Posted by: Lena Dunham and Amy Schumer at March 13, 2019 11:33 AM (fqUgw)

152 Before she became Hanoi Jane, she was just a well-connected, pudgy faced ingenue.

********

Makes one wonder if old Henry kicked in a few thousand bucks when Jane was applying for entry into North Vietnam.

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (m45I2)

153 Uh, no. The NCAA will be given a report from the FBI/DOJ and will work with them to ascertain exactly what happened. The NCAA then will determine what sanctions will occur at it's member schools whose coaches participated in this.
The NCAA didn't perpetuate this.

Posted by: Jen the original at March 13, 2019 11:30 AM (nInlj)
......

I think this is closer to correct.

That's what happened a few years back with the sneaker scandal with basketball players.

I'm thinking the start of this investigation is probably the result of what came out in that investigation,

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (gCzjH)

154 If it weren't for her father, she would've been at the bottom of the barrel in terms of the beautiful women who paraded through Hollywood in that era.
Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun

I watched the end of The Big Sleep yesterday, the one with Lauren Bacall. Woman couldn't act her way out of a paper bag, but my, she was fine to look at.

Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (TpAxy)

155 Why the fuck do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?

So that women can get places.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (fuK7c)

156 149 Is that Vox thing for real? It can't be. I refused to live in this fucking world anymore if it is.
Posted by: Lurking Lurker at March 13, 2019 11:28 AM (eZuvF)

Get back here. You're not leaving before me.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards

FTS! I was born here.
THEY can get right the fuck off.
Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:33 AM (LHT0w)

Good man. I'll start fueling the 'copters.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (bcbK8)

157 Has anyone ever asked the pertinent question? Why the fuck do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?
Posted by: JoeF. at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (NFEMn)

----------------------

Theoretically, once perfected they will do the job much better than people, eliminating accidents. Reality, not so much.

Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (ffYR/)

158 Some young idiot, clearly born after 9/11, suggested in the Vox Populi section of our fish wrap today, this:

"Forget the dumb wall. Abolish the department of Homeland Security."

Proving once again, we aren't anywhere near approaching Peak Stupidity.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (ptqGC)

159 Jacqueline Bissett blows Jane Fonda out of the water.

https://tinyurl.com/yyf5435g

Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (JoUsr)

160

"Studies show dying the underarm hair may lead to skin cancer."

Posted by: mindful webworker - #fakenoods? at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (jMD9L)

161 Has anyone ever asked the pertinent question? Why the fuck do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?

Millennials don't like driving
Posted by: BlackOrchid

Tees up with a big, juicy, fat Ping driver:

"Fuck millennials"

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:35 AM (LHT0w)

162 No one appreciates the art of rapper names.

Posted by: OG Busta Phartamus at March 13, 2019 11:35 AM (hjaPQ)

163 Self Driving cars hit black people.

-
Well, at least Edgar Winter will be OK.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 11:35 AM (+y/Ru)

164 But...a sailing team???
A sailing team???!!!

They have a sailing team??? WTF!!!! "

If LSU has a sailing team, I'd expect the Captain to be able to race while standing with each foot on an alligator, the reins in his teeth while he holds a Confederate Flag overhead to catch the breeze.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:35 AM (Kpl3J)

165
I want a self-driving car with a self-leaning horn.
Posted by: Muldoon

With self-eating beans and self-reading porn.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at March 13, 2019 11:35 AM (aKsyK)

166 138 Has anyone ever asked the pertinent question? Why the fuck do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?
Posted by: JoeF. at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (NFEMn)

___

I'll ask Alexa.

Posted by: Lurking Lurker at March 13, 2019 11:35 AM (eZuvF)

167
Why the fuck do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?

So that women can get places.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM

* Hold envelope to forehead *

The #1 answer, parallel park.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:35 AM (jYje5)

168 We need self driving cars so they can charge more for cars.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (xfb67)

169 154 If it weren't for her father, she would've been at the bottom of the barrel in terms of the beautiful women who paraded through Hollywood in that era.
Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun

I watched the end of The Big Sleep yesterday, the one with Lauren Bacall. Woman couldn't act her way out of a paper bag, but my, she was fine to look at.
Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (TpAxy)

Depends on who you're asking her to portray. She was fine in the 'horse racing' scene with Bogart. And she was amazing in 'To Have and Have Not'. She didn't have a lot of range but she could deliver.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (bcbK8)

170 Well, then Uber and Tesla need to get cracking on the armored turret add-ons. Ball's going up any day now.

Let's see, you get into your Model 3 and press and hold the up-button on the left side of the steering wheel while tapping the down-button on the right side three times, wiggle the turn signal left-right-left-left.

That enables Ghetto Mode, which no one is supposed to know about.

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (8erNz)

171 "Studies show dying the underarm hair may lead to skin cancer."
Posted by: mindful webworker

Never mess with the underarms.
That way leads to lymph nodes and bad juju.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (LHT0w)

172 Has anyone ever asked the pertinent question? Why the fuck do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?
Posted by: JoeF. at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (NFEMn)

Because people are stupid. They can't figure out how to drive a car without using their cell phone, fixing their eye makeup, facebooking, watching movies and getting high.

It's for the greater good.

I still think that if we let the Darwin Awards steady along, the WORLD will be better off.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (9gDA7)

173 Jacqueline Bissett blows Jane Fonda out of the water.

Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (JoUsr)

I agree, but we didn't get Bissett....see?

Posted by: BignJames at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (ykq7q)

174 While doing laundry, I had a brain fart and decided to check out The View for giggles.

The hags (including Ana Navarro and Meggie Mac) were celebrating Mitten's birthday. Because of course.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (ptqGC)

175 145 Has anyone ever asked the pertinent question? Why ... do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?

Millennials don't like driving

I don't like driving while commuting, and would gladly have my car do it automatically.

Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (TpAxy)

176 Does the porn come before or after the beans?

Seems like before would be a safer bet.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (pUDQf)

177
Self Driving cars hit black people.
-
Well, at least Edgar Winter will be OK.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler

Cars will turn around when they see him.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at March 13, 2019 11:37 AM (aKsyK)

178 Millennials don't like driving

Posted by: BlackOrchid at March 13, 2019 11:32 AM

This.
When I'm teaching, I always make a reference to a four barrel Holley pumping a 396 hemi, with a 4 speed Hearst shifter.

Maybe one kid gets it.

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:37 AM (0tfLf)

179 We should dye Ace Green for St. Patrick's Day.

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 11:37 AM (aYkrr)

180 Why the fuck do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?

So that women can get places.

********

Although, to be fair, a self-parallel-parking car would probably suffice.

**ducks**

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 11:38 AM (m45I2)

181 173 Jacqueline Bissett blows Jane Fonda out of the water.

Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (JoUsr)

I agree, but we didn't get Bissett....see?
Posted by: BignJames at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (ykq7q)

Can....can I get some video of Jacqueline Bissett blowing Jane Fonda?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:38 AM (bcbK8)

182 This.
When I'm teaching, I always make a reference to a four barrel Holley pumping a 396 hemi, with a 4 speed Hearst shifter.

Maybe one kid gets it.
Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:37 AM (0tfLf)

If you're lucky, one might remember the stupid ad campaign with the two trailer trash dudes running around in the bbq stained shirts yelling "IT'S GOT A HEMI!!!!"

and that would be the extent of the knowledge.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:38 AM (9gDA7)

183 We should dye Ace Green for St. Patrick's Day.

How do you know he's not already green?

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 11:38 AM (fuK7c)

184 I wonder if you can just get wasted at the bar and have the autonomous car drive you home.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 11:39 AM (gCzjH)

185 It's for the greater good.

I still think that if we let the Darwin Awards steady along, the WORLD will be better off.
Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (9gDA7)

...the greater good...

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:39 AM (bcbK8)

186 Hanoi Jane really was a beautiful girl, before she got stoopid.

See her at her nubile best in Tall Story, a dumb movie she starred in alongside Anthony Perkins.

Posted by: Forheremenaremen at March 13, 2019 11:39 AM (aJkQ0)

187 Jacqueline Bissett blows Jane Fonda out of the water.

-
The movie, The Deep, sucked donkey dongs but she appeared in a bikini.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 11:39 AM (+y/Ru)

188 This.
When I'm teaching, I always make a reference to a four barrel Holley pumping a 396 hemi, with a 4 speed Hearst shifter.

Maybe one kid gets it.
Posted by: Diogenes

Redneck kids know: three-on-the-tree, four on the floor, & a fifth under the seat.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:39 AM (LHT0w)

189 Self driving cars started out as self driving trucks meant to replace the human component of long haul trucking.

Computers don't need sleep. Stuff gets where it's going faster.

There will never be self driving cars as long as there are lawyers.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at March 13, 2019 11:39 AM (pUDQf)

190 My goodness Jane Fonda was fuckable back in the day.

Posted by: monkey at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (FTPVM)

191 Ah, Jane Fonda. Nicest set of hind paws in Hollywood, in her day.

Posted by: Heel and Arch Fanciers, Inc. at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (elsTe)

192 I like driving. Nay, I love driving. I have a couple of fun, fast, impractical cars that I drive the hell out of.

But I'm in a very small minority. Most people view cars as appliances. Make those appliances self-operating and the masses will be more than happy to buy one.

Posted by: Lurking Lurker at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (eZuvF)

193 The movie, The Deep, sucked donkey dongs but she appeared in a bikini.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 11:39 AM (+y/Ru)

And a wet tee-shirt

Posted by: JoeF. at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (NFEMn)

194 >>Millennials don't like driving

I had to threaten my 14 year old nephew with a slap down if he didn't get in the truck and drive it to the other side of the ranch for me!

He all but refused. "I don't want to.".

'I don't fucking care. Get in that truck. Put on your seatlbelt ...and if I beat you over there with the tractor, you are still getting a beating!'

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (aYkrr)

195 They have never been conservatives and let's make sure that they are never allowed to put their masks back on.

Make sure to point, laugh, and say "you're a special kind of stupid aren't you."

Trust me when I say that they really hate when someone does that.

Posted by: NALNAMSAM at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (YkEgi)

196
Never mess with the underarms.
That way leads to lymph nodes and bad juju.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM

Some cute little chick works at a local hardware store. She's proud of her tats and was telling my wife and I we were still young enough to get them. Which I immediately interrupted as she wanting to fvck me. But then I told her about how the ink migrates to the lymph nodes over time and that can be a very bad thing.

She didn't seem happy about that. I don't think she wanted to fvck me anymore. Stab me, yes.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (jYje5)

197 "Self-driving cars may be likelier to hit black people than White people."

I'm thinking that maybe if black people smiled more at night, the cars could detect them and take appropriate corrections to run over them.

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (3sjI6)

198 175 145 Has anyone ever asked the pertinent question? Why ... do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?

Millennials don't like driving

I don't like driving while commuting, and would gladly have my car do it automatically.
Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (TpAxy)

Yes, this. I want self-driving as an option so I can resume my zombie-like status on my looooong commute. I'm definitely not a morning person. But I would like to do it manually for short errands. The problem is that we'll eventually have only self-driving because our bureaucratic masters are fascists, and have I ranted about decimating the bureaucracy recently?

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (RD7QR)

199 The movie, The Deep, sucked donkey dongs but she appeared in a bikini.

That was not the highlight.

Posted by: Wet T-Shirt at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (fuK7c)

200 "Take me to 'Whole Foods'"

"I can't do that Dave."

Posted by: JAS at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (KOCKb)

201 396 hemi,

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:37 AM (0tfLf)

Chevy made a hemi?

Posted by: BignJames at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (ykq7q)

202 Will self driving cars come with interior splash guards for the windows?

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable and Profoundly Unserious at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (pw+jk)

203 152 Before she became Hanoi Jane, she was just a well-connected, pudgy faced ingenue.
********

There's a 1962 Tennessee Williams movie, "Period of Adjustment" which sometimes plays around Christmas. It was made when Jane Fonda was only 25 years old, and I think it's one of her best performances. She had real talent, right from the start. It's worth seeing if you get the chance, one of the happier Tennessee Williams scripts. (I suspect the photo on top of this thread comes from about this timeframe)

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:41 AM (Kpl3J)

204 Hanoi Jane's Bareboobarellas were the first I ever saw on the big screen. Zero-G striptease was pretty good sfx for the day. Only thing I ever saw her in.

I really began to realize our country's problems when she returned from the Viet Cong Admiration Tour and was not charged with treason. Whaaaa?

Posted by: mindful webworker - not fonda the way things went at March 13, 2019 11:41 AM (jMD9L)

205 >>How do you know he's not already green?

He's a Mottled Brown with one white band on his left, hind paw.

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 11:41 AM (aYkrr)

206 Looks like Fredo's Judge berman is gonna stick to manafort but good.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 13, 2019 11:41 AM (Y+V3r)

207 Will self driving cars come with interior splash guards for the windows?
Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable and Profoundly Unserious at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (pw+jk)

I'd settle for a cattle pusher.......

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:41 AM (9gDA7)

208 73: The male pic is of Cody Walker.

89: Yes! Congrats, you're the first.

Not according to GQ. They seem to think it's Paul Himself.

https://tinyurl.com/y2o5mv2r

Scroll to the bottom of the article.

Posted by: WisdomLover at March 13, 2019 11:41 AM (/69ZC)

209 But honestly? They are on top of every detail regarding every recruit.

They missed all this?!?

And this was the ONLY nonprofit company profiting off of abusing Title IX's gender balance reading? REALLY?
Posted by: BlackOrchid at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (Rarvo)

The NCAA isn't on top of every recruit. The individual member schools have compliance departments that are required to monitor all recruiting and all interactions with student athletes The schools will self report compliance issues to the NCAA and their correction of those issues and the NCAA then decides if that correction was adequate or if additional sanctions from the NCAA is required. The only way the NCAA initiates an investigation is if they get a report filed directly to them accusing a school or player of wrongdoing. Anyone can file a report, including you or I. Otherwise, they have to rely on the member schools doing the reporting( there are serious penalties for not reporting, the dreaded "loss of institutional control", which has resulted in many a school losing scholarships, championships, bowl bids, etc.)

The NCAA is made up of hundreds of small, medium and large colleges and universities who are represented to the NCAA by single individuals. Those individuals sit on committees, etc. And they are who actually determine punishments, rules, regulations, etc. There are student athlete reps there also.
The administration for the NCAA is actually rather small and the compliance/investigative section is small. People don't realize the NCAA can't subpoena people, they can't demand private records, phone calls, etc. they have to rely on investigations by law enforcement for those records and information.

But they will most certainly be involved in what happens now with their member schools violating the NCAA rules and regs, which will be info they get from the DOJ. The DOJ would be able to get information on compliance records, etc. sent to the NCAA from these schools as part of their investigation.

Posted by: Jen the original at March 13, 2019 11:42 AM (nInlj)

210 Never mess with the underarms.
That way leads to lymph nodes and bad juju.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM

See. Even the Africans hated the Joo Joos.

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at March 13, 2019 11:42 AM (3sjI6)

211 And yet, Roger Vadim still wasn't satisfied with her.

Posted by: JAS at March 13, 2019 11:42 AM (KOCKb)

212 Unicorn and armpits should never go together ever.

Nuke with fire this stupidity.

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 13, 2019 11:42 AM (TJ9+R)

213 200 "Take me to 'Whole Foods'"

"I can't do that Dave."

Posted by: JAS at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (KOCKb)

____

Thing is now Whole Foods comes to you. The need for a car is not what it once used to be. If every business delivers to your front door, and 90% of your life is spent staring at a computer screen, what's the point of owning a car?

And no I'm not saying ban cars so don't jump on me. I'm saying, I can see the appeal of not owning a car for a segment of the population.

Posted by: Lurking Lurker at March 13, 2019 11:42 AM (eZuvF)

214 176
Does the porn come before or after the beans?

Seems like before would be a safer bet.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at March 13, 2019 11:36 AM (pUDQf)

Gotta look out for those ATM withdrawals.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (jxbfJ)

215 Redneck kids know: three-on-the-tree, four on the floor, & a fifth under the seat.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:39 AM

*********

Any decent pickup doesn't run well until there is half a fifth rolling around under the bench seat.

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (0tfLf)

216

All fraudulent, the Yale soccer player had never played a single competitive game of soccer in her life.

*loooong sigh*

I really miss honesty.

And merit.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy says #PurgeProgressivism at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (HaL55)

217

Fuck Jane Fonda and the syphilitic chicken her diseased horse rode in on.

Posted by: irongrampa at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (S/hVx)

218 More like 'Take me to Wendy's'

I can't do that Dave. The analysis of your sweat shows elevated sodium content. Your current weight is 227 pounds, 30 pounds above your healthy target.

Consuming Wendy's would increase your danger score and you would be penalized with higher government insurance costs.'

' I meant Wendy my sister, you asshole.'

Posted by: AlaBAMA at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (pUDQf)

219 * Hold envelope to forehead *

The #1 answer, parallel park.

Americans think their car is three feet wider than it really is, while the Italians think their car is 20cm or so narrower than it really is.

You're coming down some residential street with plenty of room for two Suburbans to clear one another and the Honda Fit coming the other way goes into full panic, pulls hard to the right and creeps along...

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (8erNz)

220 There's a 1962 Tennessee Williams movie, "Period of Adjustment" which sometimes plays around Christmas. It was made when Jane Fonda was only 25 years old, and I think it's one of her best performances. She had real talent, right from the start.
Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:41 AM (Kpl3J)

Well, compared to Peter, she was a fucking genius as an actor.

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (3sjI6)

221 There's a non-zero probability that the ketchup will get on the steak.

It's a very short step from that to ketchup on hot dogs.

Forewarned is forearmed.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (t2D+9)

222 Well, then Uber and Tesla need to get cracking on the armored turret add-ons. Ball's going up any day now.
Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (RD7QR)

I have always wanted a Supercharged Pontiac JJ - but now the company is gone.

(Alas I cannot find the story that is from, I am convinced it was Larry Niven.)

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 11:44 AM (9VeU0)

223 I really miss honesty.

And merit.
Posted by: BackwardsBoy says #PurgeProgressivism at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (HaL55)

___

Checking with my SJW sources.....yes, confirmed. You are a racist.

Posted by: Lurking Lurker at March 13, 2019 11:44 AM (eZuvF)

224 Well, compared to Peter, she was a fucking genius as an actor.
Posted by: Anonymous White Male at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (3sjI6)

Talk about white bread

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 13, 2019 11:44 AM (Y+V3r)

225 184 I wonder if you can just get wasted at the bar and have the autonomous car drive you home.
Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 11:39 AM (gCzjH)

That's one of the selling points. "Oh, if we only have self-driving vehicles then people can drink and get stoned as much as they want!" Although it's not usually phrased that way.

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:44 AM (RD7QR)

226 More like 'Take me to Wendy's'

I can't do that Dave. The analysis of your sweat shows elevated sodium content. Your current weight is 227 pounds, 30 pounds above your healthy target.

Consuming Wendy's would increase your danger score and you would be penalized with higher government insurance costs.'

' I meant Wendy my sister, you asshole.'
Posted by: AlaBAMA at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (pUDQf)

Seriously, I think this is in OwebamaCare. They just haven't figured out how to convince every Dr to install the interface in every patient.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:45 AM (9gDA7)

227 200 "Take me to 'Whole Foods'"

"I can't do that Dave."

Posted by: JAS at March 13, 2019 11:40 AM (KOCKb)

--

Heh.

Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun at March 13, 2019 11:45 AM (JoUsr)

228 I couldn't wait to get driving. Went to the DMV on my exact birthday to take the driving test. Also I couldn't wait to get out of the parent's house. Left the summer after graduating.

Millennials are fucked in the head.

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable and Profoundly Unserious at March 13, 2019 11:45 AM (pw+jk)

229 222 Well, then Uber and Tesla need to get cracking on the armored turret add-ons. Ball's going up any day now.
Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (RD7QR)

I have always wanted a Supercharged Pontiac JJ - but now the company is gone.

(Alas I cannot find the story that is from, I am convinced it was Larry Niven.)
Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 11:44 AM (9VeU0)

Harlan Ellison did an armored death car story once, IIRC.

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:45 AM (RD7QR)

230 Jacqueline Bissett blows Jane Fonda out of the water.

===============

I well remember my brother owned a movie poster of Bissett in "The Deep". Very memorable poster, though I have no idea what the movie was about.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Raise you! at March 13, 2019 11:45 AM (LISuA)

231 45 Has anyone ever asked the pertinent question? Why ... do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?

They will be a real boon for the elderly.

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 11:45 AM (9VeU0)

232
I have always wanted a Supercharged Pontiac JJ - but now the company is gone.

(Alas I cannot find the story that is from, I am convinced it was Larry Niven.)
Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 11:44 AM (9VeU0)

Owebama forced GM to cancel Pontiac because he didn't like the acronym.......

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:45 AM (9gDA7)

233 I parallel parked at the pharmacy the other day, and an old gent came up to me and praised me on my skillz. And he wasn't being sarcastic.

Back up cameras for the win.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at March 13, 2019 11:46 AM (ptqGC)

234 Well, compared to Peter, she was a fucking genius as an actor.

--

You must've missed his dynamic role in 'Race with the Devil.'

Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun at March 13, 2019 11:46 AM (JoUsr)

235 The push for self driving cars also is economical. If you can have robot cars driving 24/7 (with just enough down time to gas up or recharge), then it would be much more efficient than having cars sitting 95% of the time in a driveway or parking garage. Would need a lot less space for all that parking too.

It is an appealing idea. You need a ride, you hail a robot cars, get to your destination. Rinse and repeat.

Posted by: Lurking Lurker at March 13, 2019 11:47 AM (eZuvF)

236 Car Wars anyone?

Posted by: Anna Puma at March 13, 2019 11:47 AM (TJ9+R)

237 I parallel parked at the pharmacy the other day, and an old gent came up to me and praised me on my skillz. And he wasn't being sarcastic.

Back up cameras for the win.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at March 13, 2019 11:46 AM (ptqGC)

You didn't call him a chauvinist and piss on his shoe?

That wasn't very feminist of you.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:47 AM (9gDA7)

238 Since my comment on the ONT didn't attract even a yawn, I musta put it in the wrong place. Wait -- This is Morning Rant! *said in a library voice*

Drudge blurb sez -- Gavin Newsome to stop death penalty in CA

Might as well. They haven't had an execution since 2006, and a grand total of 13 since the death penalty was reinstated in 1972 or 73. And yet

California rejected two initiatives to repeal the death penalty by popular vote in 2012 and 2016, and it adopted in 2016 another proposal to expedite its appeal process. Wiki

Gavin overrules CA voters like a Hawaiian judge.

Posted by: GnuBreed at March 12, 2019 11:18 PM (Z4rgH)

Posted by: GnuBreed at March 13, 2019 11:47 AM (Z4rgH)

239 "The Deep". Very memorable poster, though I have no idea what the movie was about.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Raise you! at March 13, 2019 11:45 AM (LISuA)

It had a plot?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 13, 2019 11:47 AM (Y+V3r)

240 You're coming down some residential street with plenty of room for two Suburbans to clear one another and the Honda Fit coming the other way goes into full panic, pulls hard to the right and creeps along...
Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (8erNz)

===

Unkess you are in San Francisco where the Honda Fit driver takes his half of the road from the center.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at March 13, 2019 11:48 AM (qdLxg)

241 >>I couldn't wait to get driving. Went to the DMV on my exact birthday to take the driving test.

Gramps and my Uncles used to make me drive all the time. From the time I was 13 or so.

Go get the dumptruck and drive it up to the diesel tanks...Go get my Truck and take it to Chooch's and fill the tanks...Go get my Van and drive it to the shop and clean it out and get it organized for tomorrow...

It was great. My driving test was a breeze.

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 11:48 AM (aYkrr)

242 When a journalist claims a bizarre new trend, it means:

A. Here's what some of my friends are doing
B. Here's what I'm being paid to promote by someone who will make money off of the trend
C. He's a trend I desperately want to start!
D. I'm out of ideas and I need clickbait now, stat!
E. I'm bored, let's see if I can make 'fetch' happen
E. Several/all of the above

Implied: It's all BS and this is about as tired a journalistic habit as the evening local news teaser that says "This one thing in your [house, car, make-up kit, lunch, OTC medicine, etc.] may kill you!"

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 11:48 AM (W+vEI)

243 Jane sure was a looker for many years. Shame about her.
Isn't the dude Thor's little brother?

Posted by: Oedipus at March 13, 2019 11:48 AM (CXLVd)

244
But...a sailing team???
A sailing team???!!!

They have a sailing team??? WTF!!!!
Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:27 AM

I would wager Stanford probably has a chess team too

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 11:48 AM (uSoVh)

245 Well, compared to Peter, she was a fucking genius as an actor.

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (3sjI6)

One of the most amusing stories about Peter Fonda (maybe in the end what he'll be most remembered for) came from John Lennon. He said in an interview that he and the other Beatles were at a party somewhere and Peter Fonda was there, dropping acid. Fonda walked up to them and said "I know what it's like to be dead!" which then got turned into a famous lyric in "She said, She said."

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:48 AM (Kpl3J)

246 It is an appealing idea. You need a ride, you hail a robot cars, get to your destination. Rinse and repeat.
Posted by: Lurking Lurker at March 13, 2019 11:47 AM (eZuvF)

--------------------

It is also an ideal way to track every movement of the citizens.

Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (ffYR/)

247 Gavin overrules CA voters like a Hawaiian judge.

======
Shut up Newsome explained to the majority of Californians.

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable and Profoundly Unserious at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (pw+jk)

248 >> But...a sailing team???
A sailing team???!!!

I have a bunch of friends who sailed competitively in college. Many of them have made their careers in the industry and done very, very well.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (/tuJf)

249 They will be a real boon for the elderly.

....

And for businesses that pay people to drive.

I have no idea what all those Somalis in NYC are going to do for a living after autonomous cabs.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (gCzjH)

250 Demolition Derby > Car Wars.

And what ever happened to Demolition Derby? And ice skaters jumping over barrels? And log rolling?

Wide World of Sports led me to believe that they were all important sports.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (fuK7c)

251 So . . . how do self-driving cars do with white pedestrians when it's snowing?

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (W+vEI)

252 I remember that the story contained the phrases "we regret to inform you..." and "routine lane change engagement."

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (9VeU0)

253 You didn't call him a chauvinist and piss on his shoe?

That wasn't very feminist of you.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:47 AM (9gDA7)

Dang it. I forgot to.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (ptqGC)

254 239 "The Deep". Very memorable poster, though I have no idea what the movie was about.
_______________

The movie was about Bissett in a wet t-shirt. And a wet suit. And a swimsuit. But mainly a wet t-shirt.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (fqUgw)

255 Jacqueline Bissett blows Jane Fonda out of the water.

*******

Lets face it, any sentence that begins with "Jacquline Bissett blows..." is going to get read.

But still, FTW, Ursula Andress.

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (0tfLf)

256 It was great. My driving test was a breeze.
Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 11:48 AM (aYkrr)

My FiL lives way out East Texas. My 14 year old wants to drive a vehicle the next time we're out there.

Warmed me up a bit.

Most millennial's have no desire to learn to drive.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (9gDA7)

257 How would driverless cars do in bad weather? Could they handle snowy roads? Could a driverless car get you out of a snow drift?
Honest questions.

Posted by: N. L. Urker at March 13, 2019 11:50 AM (JgA4k)

258
I have no idea what all those Somalis in NYC are going to do for a living after autonomous cabs.
_____________

They'll have to learn to code.

Posted by: TrivialPursuer at March 13, 2019 11:50 AM (fqUgw)

259 I'll tell everyone that has the desire/means to relocate: Huntsville, Alabama is Boomtown, USA and it ain't going anywhere.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at March 13, 2019 11:50 AM (B+qrE)

260 Mmm-mmm-good! This is one of the few cases where I don't go fries-with-ketchup, as the juices from the stake add more than enough flavoring to make a proper carnivore happy.

Posted by: Brother Cavil at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (AM1GF)

261 Sometimes I don't get through the prayer list. Today I did. Oh, Lord, hear them all. No need too great, no need too small, if it matters to folks' spiritual health.
____________

Mark 9:23-24

Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth.

And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.

Posted by: mindful webworker - what that guy said! at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (jMD9L)

262 Gavin overrules CA voters like a Hawaiian judge.

Posted by: GnuBreed at March 12, 2019 11:18 PM (Z4rgH)

===

He did the same thing with gay marriage, except that was voted down by the state's voters twice.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (qdLxg)

263 You need a ride, you hail a robot cars, get to your destination.

********

Something tells me that during my typical home project that the robot car would balk at my fourth or fifth trip back to Home Depot.

Maybe someone could invent a self-improving house.

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (m45I2)

264 239 "The Deep". Very memorable poster, though I have no idea what the movie was about.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Raise you! at March 13, 2019 11:45 AM (LISuA)

It had a plot?"

Heh - use a zoom on that poster and you'll see EXACTLY what it's about!

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (Kpl3J)

265 I have no idea what all those Somalis in NYC are going to do for a living after autonomous cabs.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (gCzjH)

==
And we have our next white racist meme coming out tomorrow. Well played.

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable and Profoundly Unserious at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (pw+jk)

266 the Snowbomb Cyclone has hit this town. fortunately i am at home.

Posted by: boulder t'hobo at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (ykYG2)

267

I'm probably going to get booed for this one, but dang, she does photograph well

Boo. I don't give a fck what she looks like. She's an unrepentant communist bitch. The only picture I want to see of her is laying dead against a wall after the firing squad did its job

Posted by: TheQuietMan at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (OLCnA)

268 >>My FiL lives way out East Texas. My 14 year old wants to drive a vehicle the next time we're out there.

Hells yeah!

Let's go run down some Coyotes, kid!

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (aYkrr)

269
Back up cameras for the win.

I have to keep reminding my wife that she's looking at an expensive ticket if she relies on the rear camera alone to back up. Some cop sees her she's toast.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (jYje5)

270 I would be a buyer for a car that would drive itself when I want it to, or turn off so I could drive myself if I wanted.

I figure I sit in traffic twice a day, and it's generally because people see congestion and one person slows down a little, then the person behind him slows down a LOT, and blocks the whole damn road. Something to override this human tendency would be valuable, but there seems to be the utility to be able to come and go on my schedule and not the Metro's.

If it could self-parallel-park my ex-wife would buy one too.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, as if you give a damn at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (PFy0L)

271 How would driverless cars do in bad weather? Could they handle snowy roads? Could a driverless car get you out of a snow drift?
Honest questions.
Posted by: N. L. Urker at March 13, 2019 11:50 AM (JgA4k)

Self Drive ON!!!!!!!! SELF - DRIVE!!!!!!

Posted by: John Spartan at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (9gDA7)

272 AOC: Sir, why did you beat your wife?
Witness: I'm not married.
AOC [shuffling papers]: Then who did you beat?
Witness: I have never beaten anyone.
AOC [whispers with aide]: Well, then, hypothetically, if you were married and you, like, beat your wife, why did you do it?
Witness: Ask her?

Posted by: Alexandria Occasio-Cortez (Dimwit -NY) at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (4Eo4+)

273 Well Janes best role was in Barberella... Just like Sarandons best role was Rocky Horror Picture show... Well it is for me anyway...

Posted by: It's me donna at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (O2RFr)

274 self driving cars =Deathrace 2000

Posted by: notsothoreau at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (JKNZq)

275 >>It is an appealing idea. You need a ride, you hail a robot cars, get to your destination. Rinse and repeat.
--------------------
>>It is also an ideal way to track every movement of the citizens.

Now consider that Apple and google are doing this --- and how they like to deplatform based on ideology. Do you want *those guys* deciding whether or not you will get driven to your destination?

Example: "Car, take me to the shooting range." "I'm sorry, that destination in no longer available."

Reliance on tech enables the Chinese social credit system concept to be implemented in some manner here.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (W+vEI)

276 259 I'll tell everyone that has the desire/means to relocate: Huntsville, Alabama is Boomtown, USA and it ain't going anywhere.
Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at March 13, 2019 11:50 AM (B+qrE)

What are the big industries there?

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (RD7QR)

277 Owebama forced GM to cancel Pontiac because he didn't like the acronym.......

Touche' or something like that.

But the reality is that by the '80s they WERE Cadillacs, and so were Chevys, Buicks, and everything else.

GM ate itself.

Back in the '30s Sloan wrote that GM was careful to (a) maintain price-point separation between its brands and (b) price its brands at the top end of each segment.

But the managers he hired and promoted destroyed that after the war, and by the '80s there was basically no distinction, either in material quality or in price, between a Caprice and a Sedan De Ville. It'd become a race to the bottom, Chevy managers wanted an upscale car and Cadillac wanted volume and so they all met at the lower-middle end of the market and there was no room in that narrow niche for all GM's brands.

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (8erNz)

278 Oh, Paul Walker. Never heard of him. Good lookin dude, tho (nohomo).
For a future picture for the 'ettes, may I suggest Andy Whitfield, OM?

Posted by: Oedipus at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (CXLVd)

279 >>It had a plot?"

Drug smuggling and an exploding lighthouse. Some of the diving scenes for the movie were done in the BVI.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (/tuJf)

280 Hells yeah!

Let's go run down some Coyotes, kid!

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (aYkrr)

We've got about 50 acres out there that I'd have no issues throwing her loose in for a while......

Posted by: John Spartan at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (9gDA7)

281 You need a ride, you hail a robot cars, get to your destination. Rinse and repeat.

***

They ain't gonna rinse themselves, that's for sure

Posted by: Total Control Racist at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (liEAR)

282 Here in GA, in order to renew your license you need a copy of your birth certificate or a passport, your actual Social Security card or something showing it, and proof of residency (such as a utility bill). I have to renew this summer, and I Can't Wait to deal with the local DMV.

Yet, Stacey Abrams and the rest of the mouth-breathing progs don't want anyone to have to show ID to vote. And Stacey takes it another step and wants illegals to vote.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (ptqGC)

283
Autonomous cars work well on a closed route that eliminates variables to the degree possible.

Not so well in the real world, and they never WILL work efficiently.

Posted by: irongrampa at March 13, 2019 11:53 AM (S/hVx)

284 DAMN you sock....

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:53 AM (9gDA7)

285 I couldn't wait to get driving. Went to the DMV on my exact birthday to take the driving test. Also I couldn't wait to get out of the parent's house. Left the summer after graduating.

Millennials are fucked in the head.
Posted by: Jukin

Did your parents helicopter over you and pay for your every want and need?

I had the best parents ever, but they didn't.
So, like you, I was ready to go when it was time.

Kids these days? Pfffft.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:54 AM (LHT0w)

286
He said in an interview that he and the other Beatles were at a party somewhere and Peter Fonda was there, dropping acid. Fonda walked up to them and said "I know what it's like to be dead!" which then got turned into a famous lyric in "She said, She said."

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:48 AM

A member of the Moody Blues was telling a story of a party they had that the Beatles attended. The Moodies had rented a home out in the 'burbs to escape from fans, but still they had discovered the location. In fact, they told the Beatles, one fan had come in through the bathroom window.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:54 AM (jYje5)

287 271 How would driverless cars do in bad weather? Could they handle snowy roads? Could a driverless car get you out of a snow drift?
Honest questions.
Posted by: N. L. Urker at March 13, 2019 11:50 AM (JgA4k)

Self Drive ON!!!!!!!! SELF - DRIVE!!!!!!
Posted by: John Spartan at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (9gDA7)

That's why I think self-driving mode has to be, at most, optional. I can do all those things but I'm not confident a self-driving car could.

Posted by: N. L. Urker at March 13, 2019 11:54 AM (JgA4k)

288
But the managers he hired and promoted destroyed that after the war, and by the '80s there was basically no distinction, either in material quality or in price, between a Caprice and a Sedan De Ville. It'd become a race to the bottom, Chevy managers wanted an upscale car and Cadillac wanted volume and so they all met at the lower-middle end of the market and there was no room in that narrow niche for all GM's brands.
Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (8erNz)

GM as a conglomerate has ALWAYS been a piece of shit destined to fail.

They rarely innovate anything, steal every idea and build largely lower average quality vehicles.

They can go away any time and I wouldn't shed a tear.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:55 AM (9gDA7)

289 I would wager Stanford probably has a chess team too

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 11:48 AM

********

Reminds me of a great Saturday Night Live skit with Jon Belushi playing the Chess Coach. He's kicking chairs and screaming at his player, "You call that a castling???!!!"

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:55 AM (0tfLf)

290 Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:49 AM (9gDA7)

......

14 year olds are Gen Z, not millennials.

They will be superior to millenials, IMO. They will be a rational generation, I think.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 11:55 AM (gCzjH)

291 Jane Fonda really was beautiful. Horrible voice, though. Squawky, piercing. You could always plug your ears to watch Barbarella, though.

Posted by: red speck at March 13, 2019 11:55 AM (6Krd7)

292 Gary Busey's acting lessons consisted of watching Nick Nolte in The Deep 200 times.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:55 AM (Kpl3J)

293 Red headline on Drudge: STORMY DANIELS: TRUMP COULD WIN AGAIN!

-
Yeah, I always refer my deeper questions to Sloppy.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 11:55 AM (+y/Ru)

294 >>GM as a conglomerate has ALWAYS been a piece of shit destined to fail.

>>They rarely innovate anything, steal every idea and build largely lower average quality vehicles.

Yep. Steal it from another manufacturer, change it just enough to escape the Patent.

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 11:56 AM (aYkrr)

295 273 Well Janes best role was in Barberella... Just like Sarandons best role was Rocky Horror Picture show... Well it is for me anyway...
Posted by: It's me donna at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (O2RFr)

If your only redeeming features as a human being are in front of your rib cage....

Posted by: Warai-otoko at March 13, 2019 11:56 AM (Ct55T)

296 276 259 I'll tell everyone that has the desire/means to relocate: Huntsville, Alabama is Boomtown, USA and it ain't going anywhere.
Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at March 13, 2019 11:50 AM (B+qrE)

What are the big industries there?
Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (RD7QR)

Aerospace for one. I've been tempted but I truly love the PNW

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:56 AM (bcbK8)

297 When did "unicorn" mean "rainbow"? I missed a step somewhere in that linguistic evolution. Does it have to do with Bronys?

Posted by: mindful webworker - grayscaley at March 13, 2019 11:57 AM (jMD9L)

298 So . . . how do self-driving cars do with white pedestrians when it's snowing?
=====

How do self-driving cars do with lane markers when it's snowing?

Posted by: mustbequantum at March 13, 2019 11:57 AM (MIKMs)

299 14 year olds are Gen Z, not millennials.

They will be superior to millenials, IMO. They will be a rational generation, I think.
Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 11:55 AM (gCzjH)

So far, she's doing well.

Loved it a while back when she was having a discussion with friends in school about something, someone fired "Did YOU just GENDER ASSIGN ME?!?" to which my daughter responded "Oh, that's right. It's 2018, you can be a toaster if you want to......."

Made me proud.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:57 AM (9gDA7)

300 Judge in Manafort's case has stated that there is nothing about Russia collusion in his case, period.

And a million NPCs cried out in horror.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 13, 2019 11:57 AM (/tuJf)

301 I'd move to Alabama...

but, my sister is not my type.

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 11:57 AM (aYkrr)

302 *real* women have unicorn mustaches.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at March 13, 2019 11:57 AM (Ct55T)

303 I think cross-country driverless cars make more sense.

Start laying sensors on the left lane of all interstate highways.

Rent a car in Chicago and hit the road for wherever! But it turns into a regular driving vehicle when off the highway.. and you are all rested.

It seems with Uber and Lyft available everywhere nowadays, that the need (if there ever was one) for a driverless car is greatly diminished.

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:58 AM (so+oy)

304 211 And yet, Roger Vadim still wasn't satisfied with her.
Posted by: JAS at March 13, 2019 11:42 AM (KOCKb)

For every pretty girl in Hollywood, there is a guy who is tired of having sex with her.

Believe it.

Or not.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 11:58 AM (h1Jye)

305 Did your parents helicopter over you and pay for your every want and need?

I had the best parents ever, but they didn't.

So, like you, I was ready to go when it was time.

Kids these days? Pfffft.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 11:54 AM (LHT0w)

=====
I was a latch key kid. Summer time I left the apartment at 8:00 and didn't come back until I heard mom yell Jimmy dinner. No organized sports, we did that our selves. I walked, rode my bike, or took the bus everywhere I wanted to go. No helicoptering. I suspect you are correct about parents doing the worst to their kids. by doing everything for them.

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable and Profoundly Unserious at March 13, 2019 11:58 AM (pw+jk)

306 Here are some thoughts of prayer by E.M. Bounds,a minister who lived in the 1800's and wrote extensively on prayer:

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at March 13, 2019 11:58 AM (AllCR)

307 I don't have sisters but I got some cousins. I guess that means I'd have to move to Pakistan

Posted by: boulder t'hobo at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (ykYG2)

308 I'll tell everyone that has the desire/means to relocate: Huntsville, Alabama is Boomtown, USA and it ain't going anywhere.
Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at March 13, 2019 11:50 AM (B+qrE)

What are the big industries there?
Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (RD7QR)

Aerospace for one. I've been tempted but I truly love the PNW
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:56 AM (bcbK

-------------------------

As a by product of the Aerospace in the area, they have gotten pretty big into Tech there over the years.

Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (ffYR/)

309 *real* women have unicorn mustaches.
Posted by: Warai-otoko
............

but.. do the cuffs and collars match???

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (so+oy)

310 260 Mmm-mmm-good! This is one of the few cases where I don't go fries-with-ketchup, as the juices from the stake add more than enough flavoring to make a proper carnivore happy.
Posted by: Brother Cavil at March 13, 2019 11:51 AM (AM1GF)

Endorsed

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (bcbK8)

311 GM as a conglomerate has ALWAYS been a piece of shit destined to fail.

They rarely innovate anything, steal every idea and build largely lower average quality vehicles.

They can go away any time and I wouldn't shed a tear.

Oddly, they have some of the very few cars on the market now I'd actually buy. A CTS-V suits me just fine (checks NASDAQ) okay maybe next week.

Ford's become a bit of a joke, FiatMopar has a couple (but buying an Alfa Giulia would be sticking your dick in the most beautiful crazy there is), US automakers just want to build trucks and while I've got two I don't want to drive them all the time.

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (8erNz)

312 Aerospace for one. I've been tempted but I truly love the PNW

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:56 AM

********

Ditto.
Huntsville is nice with a huge Defense and Aerospace industrial base. Good weather but too humid for my tastes.
I'll stick to the PNW but am considering heading over to the East side. The rain is getting me down.

Hear that Californians...rain. Lots of RAIN. In Washington State.
Stay away!!!!

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (0tfLf)

313 They will be superior to millenials, IMO. They will be a rational generation, I think.
Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 11:55 AM (gCzjH)

--------

I think so too.

My new year's resolution has been to start teaching kids in this generation to shoot, to prepare them for when when we all have to take out the Lamest Generation.

I've got a couple interested so far

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (hkrxT)

314 Quick comment:

Been watching a lot of 1950s European movies recently, and the rather ubiquitous existence of female armpit hair is surprising.

Harriet Anderson: Beautiful young (in the 50s) Swedish woman, but as soon as she lifts her arms...

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, Read Some Movie Thoughts at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (XSSCs)

315 Muldoon has competition.

https://twitter.com/Limericking/status/1105598123345412097

Posted by: Brother Cavil at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (AM1GF)

316 Judge in Manafort's case has stated that there is nothing about Russia collusion in his case, period.

And a million NPCs cried out in horror.
Posted by: JackStraw at March 13, 2019 11:57 AM (/tuJf)

There's never been any in any part of the Mueller investigation. Period.

Anyone that's been interviewed or tried had nothing to do with Russia......

It's the biggest sham ever pulled over on the American public in US History.

Mueller should be tried for treason and shot for this.......

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (9gDA7)

317 Why the fuck do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?

So that women can get places.

That's SEXIST!!!

It's because Asians are increasingly moving to the suburbs

Posted by: kbdabear at March 13, 2019 12:00 PM (0Ntuf)

318 272 AOC: Sir, why did you beat your wife?
Witness: I'm not married.
AOC [shuffling papers]: Then who did you beat?
Witness: I have never beaten anyone.
AOC [whispers with aide]: Well, then, hypothetically, if you were married and you, like, beat your wife, why did you do it?
Witness: Ask her?
Posted by: Alexandria Occasio-Cortez (Dimwit -NY) at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (4Eo4+)
--------

I wish this was an exaggeration.

Posted by: WisRich at March 13, 2019 12:00 PM (G0vdT)

319 >>Been watching a lot of 1950s European movies recently, and the rather ubiquitous existence of female armpit hair is surprising.

I had No Problem with Nena's pits.

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 12:00 PM (aYkrr)

320 308
As a by product of the Aerospace in the area, they have gotten pretty big into Tech there over the years.
Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (ffYR/)

===========

My father-in-law is a contractor with the federal government. He's a line worker that helps build things (like trucks in Afghanistan). He lives in Huntsville and has made quite a decent living for himself there.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, Read Some Movie Thoughts at March 13, 2019 12:00 PM (XSSCs)

321 Ford's become a bit of a joke,

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:59 AM (8erNz)

Please explain......

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (9gDA7)

322 Ya know, J Fonda was a cutie when young and got the parental help to get into movies, but she looks like a lot of other young things. I thought it was a young Mariette Hartley (hairline and gingery).

Posted by: mustbequantum at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (MIKMs)

323

CHICAGO - "Empire" actor Jussie Smollett's legal team said Tuesday that they "welcome" cameras in the courtroom as prosecutors present their case that the actor staged an attack that made him look like the victim of a vicious hate crime.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (aKsyK)

324 14 year olds are Gen Z, not millennials.

They will be superior to millenials, IMO. They will be a rational generation, I think.
Posted by: Bitter Clinger

We need consistency in nomenclature.

Boomers - baby boom generation after the war. NOT when they came of age. Because they came of age during the 60's into Disco.

To me? Millennials = born on or around the millennium, NOT when they came of age. THAT'S your millennials.

Otherwise you need to call Boomers "the Free Love" generation.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (LHT0w)

325
It seems with Uber and Lyft available everywhere nowadays, that the need (if there ever was one) for a driverless car is greatly diminished.

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:58 AM

I doubt the need, or desire, by the car-buying public is, or ever was there. I think this has always been a government desire for the cars to be created, then chipped, so the government could control them and control traffic. Some utopian vision of perfectly streamlined traffic flow. Prioritized for certain members of the elite.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (jYje5)

326 317 Why the fuck do we even NEED self-driving cars? Why?

....

I take it that you haven't been to Ohio before.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (gCzjH)

327 Harriet Anderson: Beautiful young (in the 50s) Swedish woman, but as soon as she lifts her arms...

That was still a norm through the 90s. An aversion to pit hair on girls is easily overcome if you're in Europe and want to get laid.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (fuK7c)

328 the unicorn is supposedly the symbol of the "trans" movement, because the unicorn has no sex. So that might by why it is now popularized?

(according to gemma in Ireland, who thinks the unicorn is now the rage because of that agenda. But Gemma is also concerned about 5G as a globalist "weapon" ... so many theories)
http://tinyurl.com/y5mgfohe

Posted by: illiniwek at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (Cus5s)

329 291 Jane Fonda really was beautiful. Horrible voice, though. Squawky, piercing. You could always plug your ears to watch Barbarella, though.
Posted by: red speck at March 13, 2019 11:55 AM (6Krd7)

I tried to watch Barbarella a few years back. Ugh. What a colossal bore.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (h1Jye)

330 The thought of self-driving cars makes me think of the "Wide World of Sports" and the demolition derbies.

Posted by: Caliban at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (qEujL)

331

Detroit from 55 through 58 produced some truly memorable cars.

It wasn't until the 70's that they really went downhill.

Posted by: irongrampa at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (S/hVx)

332

Seriously, I think this is in OwebamaCare. They just haven't figured
out how to convince every Dr to install the interface in every patient.
Here's an Oldie but Goodie: Ordering Pizza in the Future.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNJl9EEcsoE

Posted by: BackwardsBoy says #PurgeProgressivism at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (HaL55)

333 It's because Asians are increasingly moving to the suburbs

Posted by: kbdabear at March 13, 2019 12:00 PM

**********

HA!

DWA means two different things depending on which coast you live.
Out West, its Asians.
East coast if Arabs.

Dangerous drivers.

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (0tfLf)

334 295 273 Well Janes best role was in Barberella... Just like Sarandons best role was Rocky Horror Picture show... Well it is for me anyway...
Posted by: It's me donna at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (O2RFr)

If your only redeeming features as a human being are in front of your rib cage....

I was being sarcastic of course... Chose those cause I know those two regret making them

Posted by: It's me donna at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (O2RFr)

335 But the managers he hired and promoted destroyed that after the war, and by the '80s there was basically no distinction, either in material quality or in price, between a Caprice and a Sedan De Ville. It'd become a race to the bottom, Chevy managers wanted an upscale car and Cadillac wanted volume and so they all met at the lower-middle end of the market and there was no room in that narrow niche for all GM's brands.

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 11:52 AM (8erNz)

The abomination known as the Cadillac Cimarron marked the absolute Bottom of the Barrel.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (Kpl3J)

336 I think self-driving cars could be useful for morning and evening rush hour commutes and for long-distance highway driving.

Posted by: N. L. Urker at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (JgA4k)

337 >>Detroit from 55 through 69 produced some truly memorable cars.

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (aYkrr)

338 There's carpet and drapes, as in "do they match?"

So what's armpit hair?

Posted by: mindful webworker - flug? at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (jMD9L)

339 Here in GA, in order to renew your license you need a copy of your birth certificate or a passport, your actual Social Security card or something showing it, and proof of residency (such as a utility bill). I have to renew this summer, and I Can't Wait to deal with the local DMV.

--

SC has that, too. It's called RealID or something. It's optional now, but I think it becomes mandatory in a few years. You have to bring in everything but the kitchen sink to get it.

Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun at March 13, 2019 12:03 PM (JoUsr)

340 I'd move to Alabama...

but, my sister is not my type.

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 11:57 AM (aYkrr)

Not sure the context of this comment (I read up, not down), but I get a kick out of the fact that Alabama is doing as well as it is these days, and if you could find a whiny folk singer, I bet someone could do a version that contains the line:

"California, you have the rest of the union to help you along... what's going wrong?"

Posted by: BurtTC at March 13, 2019 12:03 PM (a2xio)

341 229 222 Well, then Uber and Tesla need to get cracking on the armored turret add-ons. Ball's going up any day now.
Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:31 AM (RD7QR)

I have always wanted a Supercharged Pontiac JJ - but now the company is gone.

(Alas I cannot find the story that is from, I am convinced it was Larry Niven.)
Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 11:44 AM (9VeU0)

Harlan Ellison did an armored death car story once, IIRC.
Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:45 AM (RD7QR)

Great short story by Alan Dean Foster about armed sedans auto dueling on the LA Freeway. It's in one of his short story collections, either 'With Friends Like These' or 'Who Needs Enemies'.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:03 PM (bcbK8)

342 The abomination known as the Cadillac Cimarron marked the absolute Bottom of the Barrel.
Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (Kpl3J)

Also known as the Cadillac Cavalier.

Just like Lexus when they released the SC series, I think, where it was just a Corolla with wood trim.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 12:03 PM (9gDA7)

343 327 Harriet Anderson: Beautiful young (in the 50s) Swedish woman, but as soon as she lifts her arms...

That was still a norm through the 90s. An aversion to pit hair on girls is easily overcome if you're in Europe and want to get laid.
Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (fuK7c)

==========

I understand that, but still. It's a bit of a shock when not expecting it.

The beginning of La Dolce Vita:

A helicopter is flying over Rome with a statue of Jesus hanging from below (the movie's kinda weird). The helicopter flies over an apartment building with five beautiful women sunbathing. Our main character, a paparazzo, leans out of the helicopter and tries to pick up the women, despite the sounds of the flying machine drowning everything out. All five of the women are waving and having a good time, and exposing those armpit hairs...

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, Read Some Movie Thoughts at March 13, 2019 12:03 PM (XSSCs)

344 Muldoon has competition.

*******

They rhyme, sure. Most of them have a fair meter.

But none of them have a f**king punch line. Hacks.

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:04 PM (m45I2)

345 Cars = freedom

Driverless cars = dependence, control

It's that simple.
If you don't have control of your car, is it really yours? Not just its destination, but the activation of features, such as the cameras. One driverless car CEO promoted driverless car cameras because they could be activated when there's an amber alert. Yeah, name some other times someone other that the car's owner/passenger can activate cameras (and other features - audio?), bub, because that's kinda important.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:04 PM (W+vEI)

346 250 Demolition Derby > Car Wars.

And what ever happened to Demolition Derby? And ice skaters jumping over barrels? And log rolling?

Wide World of Sports led me to believe that they were all important sports.

'round here there are a couple of demolition derbies every year.

like you, however, i was led to belive swamp buggy racing was an important sport.

Posted by: Anachronda at March 13, 2019 12:04 PM (sGtp+)

347 CHICAGO - "Empire" actor Jussie Smollett's legal team said Tuesday that they "welcome" cameras in the courtroom as prosecutors present their case that the actor staged an attack that made him look like the victim of a vicious hate crime.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (aKsyK)

So, they're going with the OJ defense, i.e. turning the trial into a media circus.

Which only works if you get Lawrence Ito as your judge.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:04 PM (h1Jye)

348 345 Cars = freedom

Driverless cars = dependence, control

It's that simple.
If you don't have control of your car, is it really yours? Not just its destination, but the activation of features, such as the cameras. One driverless car CEO promoted driverless car cameras because they could be activated when there's an amber alert. Yeah, name some other times someone other that the car's owner/passenger can activate cameras (and other features - audio?), bub, because that's kinda important.
Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:04 PM (W+vEI)

============

Freedom from choice! The new freedom!

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, Read Some Movie Thoughts at March 13, 2019 12:05 PM (XSSCs)

349 I had No Problem with Nena's pits.
Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 12:00 PM (aYkrr)

-------

The anti-American, anti-war crap, on the other hand...

Fun fact: they filmed the video for 99 Luftballoons on a NATO base because one of her bandmates' daddy was an officer there with the pull to get it done.

The day they shot, they were testing (inert) chemical bombs.

The whole band started actually crying because of the savagery of war on display.

There was a time when an explosive chemical charge going off would give a German a boner.

No more. Sad!

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at March 13, 2019 12:05 PM (hkrxT)

350 I like Gulf Shores.
I am pretty sure it gets crazy there on spring break.
Maybe more reason to like it.

Posted by: navybrat, sometime commentater at March 13, 2019 12:05 PM (w7KSn)

351 347
CHICAGO - "Empire" actor Jussie Smollett's legal team said Tuesday
that they "welcome" cameras in the courtroom as prosecutors present
their case that the actor staged an attack that made him look like the
victim of a vicious hate crime.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (aKsyK)

So, they're going with the OJ defense, i.e. turning the trial into a media circus.

Which only works if you get Lawrence Ito as your judge.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:04 PM (h1Jye)
And Marcia as your prosecutor.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 12:05 PM (jxbfJ)

352 So, they're going with the OJ defense, i.e. turning the trial into a media circus.

Which only works if you get Lawrence Ito as your judge.
Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:04 PM (h1Jye)

Ole black OJ had a white wife.

Lookie Lookie here.....

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 12:05 PM (9gDA7)

353 Driverless cars = dependence, control

My Niece has a Tesla and I went for a ride in it... Eerily quiet. When she showed me the self driving thing, it was unnerving... Dang thing went too close to the center line for my taste

Posted by: It's me donna at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (O2RFr)

354 >>The anti-American, anti-war crap, on the other hand...

Pro Tip : Just pretend to listen to what women say.

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (aYkrr)

355 The abomination known as the Cadillac Cimarron marked the absolute Bottom of the Barrel.
Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (Kpl3J)

--------------------------

I worked in the Service Dept. of a Caddy dealer from '81 - '84. Tell me about it. All of Detroit was junk then.

Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (ffYR/)

356 Ok, I'm late to the party as usual but a number of posters in the Morning Report thread were asking how to pronounce foreign words like "cocchi".

I've found that www.forvo.com is the cat's pajamas for this stuff. The site has speakers of various languages record the pronunciations of a large number of words, including cocchi.

Very handy...

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM guy at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (7s3Gx)

357 329 291 Jane Fonda really was beautiful. Horrible voice, though. Squawky, piercing. You could always plug your ears to watch Barbarella, though.
Posted by: red speck at March 13, 2019 11:55 AM (6Krd7)

I tried to watch Barbarella a few years back. Ugh. What a colossal bore.
Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:02 PM (h1Jye)

You didn't have the sound ON did you???

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (bcbK8)

358 Manafort getting roughly 7 years with some running concurrently with his previous sentence.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (/tuJf)

359 I heard a radio interview with the authors of this book and they reaised some alrming concerns about how tech is effectively ending ownership (and privacy).

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (W+vEI)

360 352
So, they're going with the OJ defense, i.e. turning the trial into a media circus.

Which only works if you get Lawrence Ito as your judge.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:04 PM (h1Jye)

Ole black OJ had a white wife.

Lookie Lookie here.....

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 12:05 PM (9gDA7)
Jussie better fire up his Grinder and find him a white boyfriend.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (jxbfJ)

361

Pixy, please feed you hamsters. This "getting rejected because of too many spaces" when there aren't too many spaces is a gigantic PIA.
Please fix.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy says #PurgeProgressivism at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (HaL55)

362 I tried to watch Barbarella a few years back. Ugh. What a colossal bore."

I saw it again last year - the sets are fun, 60's psycho-sexual kink, and it's full of moments like "Oh, THAT'S where Duran-Duran came from!"

But everyone just stumbles through their parts, looking confused (I'm sure they were) and the story is an absolutely horrible story - at the end, everyone she came to help dies pointlessly, and she and the Head Evil character fly off together, smiling. The End.

(well it was made by The French, waddya expect)

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (Kpl3J)

363 This book:

"The End of Ownership: Personal Property in the Digital Economy (Information Society Series)"

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:07 PM (W+vEI)

364 Found Mission Impossible: Fallout on 4K for cheap.

Still haven't seen it. Thought, why the hell not?

Now it's sitting here in front of me, begging for me to watch it as soon as I get home.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, Read Some Movie Thoughts at March 13, 2019 12:07 PM (XSSCs)

365 One of Richard Pryor's wife:

"[Marlon] Brando used to go cha-cha dancing with us. He could dance his ass off," Jones told Marchese. "He was the most charming motherfucker you ever met. He'd fuck anything. Anything! He'd fuck a mailbox. James Baldwin. Richard Pryor. Marvin Gaye."

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:07 PM (+y/Ru)

366 345 One driverless car CEO promoted driverless car cameras because they could be activated when there's an amber alert.

had a humorous amber alert the other day. message on cell phone said "AMBER ALERT! for more information go to http://..."

so apparently i'm supposed to be surfing the web while driving for the children.

Posted by: Anachronda at March 13, 2019 12:07 PM (sGtp+)

367
Muldoon senses rivals.
Poets are pressing his game.
But no punchline. Hacks!

Posted by: fixerupper at March 13, 2019 12:07 PM (8XRCm)

368 Great short story by Alan Dean Foster about armed sedans auto dueling on the LA Freeway. It's in one of his short story collections, either 'With Friends Like These' or 'Who Needs Enemies'.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:03 PM (bcbK

That actually sounds like the one Harlan Ellison wrote: Idiot salesman driving with his wife, gets cut off, goes into road rage and it turns out the the guy he challenges to fight it out is one of the top duellists in the country. Zany hijinks ensue.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:08 PM (h1Jye)

369 358 Manafort getting roughly 7 years with some running concurrently with his previous sentence.

On top of the 4 ?

Posted by: It's me donna at March 13, 2019 12:08 PM (O2RFr)

370 Was that a Haiku?

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at March 13, 2019 12:09 PM (xfb67)

371 One driverless car CEO promoted driverless car cameras because they could be activated when there's an amber alert.

------

1-877-Kars-For-Kids

K A R S

Kars for Kids

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at March 13, 2019 12:09 PM (hkrxT)

372 >>On top of the 4 ?

Supposedly some of it is concurrent but the details are still being worked out.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 13, 2019 12:09 PM (/tuJf)

373 1-877-Kars-For-Kids

K A R S

Kars for Kids

Damn you to hell

Posted by: It's me donna at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (O2RFr)

374 Sierra used to have a PC game called Auto Duel. You drove from town to town through the wastelands doing jobs for money to build up your car, weapons to be able to build your empire.

I spent HOURS playing that damn game.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (9gDA7)

375 The anti-American, anti-war crap, on the other hand...

What anti-American stuff did Nena do?

Here she is in body paint, to be gratuitous:

https://bit.ly/2Hwl2DQ

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (fuK7c)

376 Thank God for concurrent sentences, am I right?

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (xfb67)

377 Which only works if you get Lawrence Ito as your judge.
Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:04 PM (h1Jye)

Well after all he is.....

Hawaiian.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (Ct55T)

378 Wide World of Sports led me to believe that they were all important sports.

.....

'round here there are a couple of demolition derbies every year.

like you, however, i was led to belive swamp buggy racing was an important sport.

.......

I mean to be fair, I think swamp buggy racing, log rolling, Demo Derby and barrel jumping would still be enjoyable watching.

Unfortunately, the sports channels have opted for 4-8 hours every day of two or three idiots arguing about Lebron James, Colin Kaepernick and the Cowboys.

I'd wager more people would watch and enjoy junked out station wagons smashing into each other. That's when men were men and liability waivers were binding.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (gCzjH)

379 Would love to see self-driving cars on the Saw Mill, say on that bridge going northbound near the Pleasantville exit where there's barely enough room for two SUVs side by side. Or on some of the entrance "ramps."

Posted by: Caliban at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (qEujL)

380 Kars for Kids

Damn you to hell
Posted by: It's me donna at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (O2RFr)

I've never understood the butchering of the English language to sell goods and services......

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (9gDA7)

381 Was that a Haiku?

More of a Low-ku.

Posted by: mikeyG at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (LL1Be)

382 Manafort getting roughly 7 years with some running concurrently with his previous sentence.
Posted by: JackStraw at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (/tuJf)

--------------------------

With his health going South as fast as it seems to be, might as well be a life sentence.

Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (ffYR/)

383 SC has that, too. It's called RealID or something. It's optional now, but I think it becomes mandatory in a few years. You have to bring in everything but the kitchen sink to get it.
Posted by: Lady in Black - Death to the Man Bun at March 13, 2019 12:03 PM (JoUsr)

I hate to recommend people get ear tagged like cows but if you need to get a RealID, do it now. If you have any *children*... do it now. There is nothing more messed up than trying to get a kid their ID figured out after they've turned 18. Trust me, I know. Been there. Don't ever want to do that.

Posted by: Synova (reversion to pseudonymous) at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (BD/yx)

384 Yuck, the rain turned to snow two hours earlier than the weather guessers had predicted yesterday. I'll be relieved when dad gets back from taking stupid dog to the vet. Stupid dog got a couple of small cuts. Probably didn't pay attention going through barbwire fence chasing a rabbit.

Posted by: PaleRider is simply irredeemable at March 13, 2019 12:11 PM (jUcoH)

385 Is Manafort consecutive or concurrent? None of the idiot news people have a clue

Posted by: Marcus T at March 13, 2019 12:11 PM (VpIIl)

386
Oh sniffybigtoe
You Ask obvious questions
What do you think, dude.

Posted by: fixerupper at March 13, 2019 12:11 PM (8XRCm)

387 I prefer not knowing who my kids are.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at March 13, 2019 12:11 PM (xfb67)

388 374 Sierra used to have a PC game called Auto Duel. You drove from town to town through the wastelands doing jobs for money to build up your car, weapons to be able to build your empire.

I spent HOURS playing that damn game.
Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (9gDA7)

Heh.

Yep, me too. Based on the Steve Jackson board game. Wasted a LOT of time on both.

Something about driving makes me want to mount machine guns, rocket launchers and recoiless rifles on my car.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:11 PM (bcbK8)

389 Well, compared to Peter, she was a fucking genius as an actor.

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at March 13, 2019 11:43 AM (3sjI6)

One of the most amusing stories about Peter Fonda (maybe in the end what he'll be most remembered for) came from John Lennon. He said in an interview that he and the other Beatles were at a party somewhere and Peter Fonda was there, dropping acid. Fonda walked up to them and said "I know what it's like to be dead!" which then got turned into a famous lyric in "She said, She said."
Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 11:48 AM (Kpl3J)

I'm familiar with the story. And yet, now in 2019, Lennon would be chastised for questioning someone identifying as dead.

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at March 13, 2019 12:12 PM (3sjI6)

390 372 >>On top of the 4 ?

Supposedly some of it is concurrent but the details are still being worked out.

Guy will die in prison for more or less "exaggerating" his worth for a loan and cheating on taxes.... But mostly for being associated with Trump... meanwhile Hillary, Comey, Strock, and McCabe all roam free...

Posted by: It's me donna at March 13, 2019 12:12 PM (O2RFr)

391 I have always wanted a Supercharged Pontiac JJ - but now the company is gone.

(Alas I cannot find the story that is from, I am convinced it was Larry Niven.)

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 **He didn't often write stories with regular 20th century cars in them. Do you recall the title of it?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at March 13, 2019 12:12 PM (elsTe)

392 What anti-American stuff did Nena do?

------

TBF, her anti-war, anti-nuclear criticism was pointed at both the US and USSR.

But that sort of ignores the fact that we were imperilling all of earth, including on our own lives, on behalf her dainty little Kraut self.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at March 13, 2019 12:12 PM (hkrxT)

393 >>Would love to see self-driving cars on the Saw Mill, say on that bridge going northbound near the Pleasantville exit where there's barely enough room for two SUVs side by side. Or on some of the entrance "ramps."

Right by the Reader's Digest Offices?

The Saw Mill and Taconic were crazy. 65+ MPH with crossraods and Curbs!

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 12:12 PM (aYkrr)

394 the unicorn has no sex
Posted by: illiniwek at March 13, 2019 12:01 PM (Cus5s)

Stupid question then,where have all the little unicorns I see running around come from? Can we blame this one on science? Just wondering

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 12:12 PM (uSoVh)

395 An absent heart
Isaiah 29:13

Devotion engages the heart in prayer. It is not an easy task for the lips to pray while the heart is absent from it. The very essence of prayer is the spirit of devotion.

Without devotion, prayer is empty, a vain round of words. Sad to say, much of this prayer prevails n the church today. This is a busy age, bustling and active, and this bustling spirit has invaded the church of God. Its religious performances are many.

True worship finds congeniality in the heart and spirit of devotion.

Prayer by E.M. Bounds:

Lord, I want to engage all of me when I come to you in prayer. Please give me a heart and spirit of devotion so that I can truly worship you.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at March 13, 2019 12:12 PM (AllCR)

396 I prefer not knowing who my kids are.
Posted by: sniffybigtoe at March 13, 2019 12:11 PM (xfb67)

What it IS my brovva.....

Posted by: Tyrone at March 13, 2019 12:13 PM (9gDA7)

397 385 Is Manafort consecutive or concurrent? None of the idiot news people have a clue
Posted by: Marcus T at March 13, 2019 12:11 PM (VpIIl)
--------

Yes.

I'm reading 60 months, 30 of which concurrent. There's additional 14 months for something.

Posted by: WisRich at March 13, 2019 12:13 PM (G0vdT)

398 Manafort getting roughly 7 years with some running concurrently with his previous sentence.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (/tuJf)

--------------------------

With his health going South as fast as it seems to be, might as well be a life sentence.

Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 12:10 PM (ffYR/)

I think I speak for the average normal American who doesn't obsess for hours and hours over this political legal witchhunt nonsense, when I say I have no idea what this guy is supposed to have done, or why whatever it is he HAS done is considered a crime.

Crimes are things like stealing and killing and hurting and otherwise being a general menace to society.

These guys playing political games, it's about on the same level of rational application of the law as Game of Thrones, and the fact that people are not chopping off each others' heads yet is a matter of custom, and not demeanor.

Posted by: BurtTC at March 13, 2019 12:13 PM (a2xio)

399 Looks like someone was experimenting with the A1 again!

Posted by: Fritz at March 13, 2019 12:14 PM (2Mnv1)

400 >>SC has that, too. It's called RealID or something. It's optional now, but I think it becomes mandatory in a few years. You have to bring in everything but the kitchen sink to get it.

I did this last year --- I think it becomes mandatory sometime in 2020. Wasn't that hard, just had to bring ~ double what one normally has to provide to get a drivers license - current bank statemen, utility bill, birth certificate, marriage license/SS#, that sort of thing.

I have been putting off getting my passport renewed, which will be unpleasant because it expired AND I lost in in a recent move. Argh!

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:14 PM (W+vEI)

401 I mean to be fair, I think swamp buggy racing, log rolling, Demo Derby and barrel jumping would still be enjoyable watching.

Unfortunately, the sports channels have opted for 4-8 hours every day of two or three idiots arguing about Lebron James, Colin Kaepernick and the Cowboys.

I'd wager more people would watch and enjoy junked out station wagons smashing into each other. That's when men were men and liability waivers were binding."

I absolutely loved Diamond-P sports - remember them??? I can't believe nobody is doing that, I could not give a shit about all of this yackety yack yack yack they put on supposed sports channels today.

of course the best sports show of all time was Takeshi's Castle.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:14 PM (Kpl3J)

402 OMG. My life has become recursive.

I am trying to google the short story I am talking about, get nowhere so i go to duckduckgo and I get this link:

27 My secret shame. Sometimes when I'm driving, I pretend I have some fixed forward machine guns and fire at other cars as they come around curves.

Larry Niven had a short story, can't recall the name. It was a letter written to a family, a regret to inform you that your son was killed in a routine lane change engagement. And it told the story. I remember there was a supercharged Pontiac JJ.

Posted by: blaster at December 03, 2016 11:03 AM (stTTh)

And then further down in the comments:

44 Holy crap I googled Larry Niven routine lane change engagement and Google has already indexed the comment here.

Posted by: blaster at December 03, 2016 11:09 AM (stTTh)

And then further down:

Got all of Niven's stuff and that isn't ringing a bell. OTOH, it sounds like a good match to Harlan Ellison's short story, "Along the Scenic Route" in the collection "Car Sinister".

"The blood-red Mercury with the twin-mounted 7.6 mm Spandaus cut George off as he was shifting lanes..."
Posted by: Additional Blond Agent at December 03, 2016 01:36 PM (UUFoE)

But, more googling, turns out the story was "Why Johnny Can't Speed" by Alan Dean Foster.

DEAR MR. AND MRS. MERWIN:

IT IS MY PAINFUL DUTY TO HAVE TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR SON, ROBERT L. MERWIN, WAS KILLED IN COMMUTER ACTION ON THE SOUTHBOUND SAN DIEGO FREEWAY IN THE VICINITY OF THE SECOND IRVINE RANCH TURNOFF, ORANGE COUNTY.
FROM WHAT OUR EVALUATORS HAVE BEEN ABLE TO RECONSTRUCT, YOUNG ROBERT APPARENTLY DISPUTED A LANE CHANGE WITH A BLACK GM CADDY MARAUDER. NO VIOLATION OF THE NORTH AMERICAN TRAFFIC CODE HAS COME TO
MY NOTICE, BUT I WILL KEEP YOU INFORMED SHOULD ANY SUCH COME TO LIGHT. NORMAL INVESTIGATIONS ARE PROCEEDING. THE OTHER VEHICLE INVOLVED IS KNOWN TO ORANGE COUNTY POLICE. ITS OWNER WAS QUESTIONED BUT NOT DETAINED. DETAILS AND PARTICULARS ARE ENCLOSED. PLEASE ACCEPT MY PERSONAL CONDOLENCES.

YOURS SINCERELY,
GEORGE WILSON ANGEL
CHIEF, SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA DIVISION
CALIFORNIA DISTRICT HIGHWAY PATROL
ENCL: 1 RPT. ACCID.
1 RPT. CORONER

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 12:14 PM (9VeU0)

403 Right by the Reader's Digest Offices?

The Saw Mill and Taconic were crazy. 65+ MPH with crossraods and Curbs!
Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 12:12 PM (aYkrr)

The one before that one. Then there's the exit that comes right after it, which is like trying to go into a hole in the wall at 65 MPH.

Posted by: Caliban at March 13, 2019 12:14 PM (qEujL)

404 368 Great short story by Alan Dean Foster about armed sedans auto dueling on the LA Freeway. It's in one of his short story collections, either 'With Friends Like These' or 'Who Needs Enemies'.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:03 PM (bcbK

That actually sounds like the one Harlan Ellison wrote: Idiot salesman driving with his wife, gets cut off, goes into road rage and it turns out the the guy he challenges to fight it out is one of the top duellists in the country. Zany hijinks ensue.
Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:08 PM (h1Jye)

Very similar.

Foster's is about a father avenging his son who challenged a better-armed driver. He guns up and hunts down the Caddy driver who killed his boy.

Good stuff.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:14 PM (bcbK8)

405 But, more googling, turns out the story was "Why Johnny Can't Speed" by Alan Dean Foster.

-------

I always loved that one.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at March 13, 2019 12:15 PM (hkrxT)

406 But that sort of ignores the fact that we were imperilling all of earth, including on our own lives, on behalf her dainty little Kraut self.

To be fair, if the US and USSR had wanted a Practice Annihilation we would have chosen an away game and it would have been on top of her dainty Kraut self.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 12:15 PM (fuK7c)

407 Stupid question then,where have all the little unicorns I see running around come from? Can we blame this one on science? Just wondering
Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 12:12 PM (uSoVh)

You see, when there's a momma horse, and a daddy horse, and one of them gets *really* horny....

Posted by: Warai-otoko at March 13, 2019 12:16 PM (Ct55T)

408 Or if not a punch line, how about a simple double entendré? Would that be too much to ask.

Or as the Italian buggerer said, some innuendo!

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:16 PM (m45I2)

409

OK Hordelings, life beckons.

Y'all try to behave.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy says #PurgeProgressivism at March 13, 2019 12:16 PM (HaL55)

410 of course the best sports show of all time was Takeshi's Castle.
Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:14 PM (Kpl3J)

Most Extreme Elimination Challenge!

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:16 PM (bcbK8)

411 @368 "Why Johnny Can't Speed."

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at March 13, 2019 12:16 PM (AB9tT)

412 This excerpt:

He activated the roof turret, an expensive option, but one which had proven its worth time and again. Myrtle had opted for the big grenade launcher, but Frank and the GM salesman bad convinced her that while showiness might be fine for impressing the neighbors, on the road it was performance that counted. The twin fifties in the turret commenced hammering away at the Cad, nicking big chips of
armorglass and battle sheathing from its front.

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (9VeU0)

413 Howdy y'all!

Hope y'all are behaving and keeping the real
World together.

Smooches!

Posted by: nurse ratched at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (NMwvZ)

414 >>The one before that one. Then there's the exit that comes right after it, which is like trying to go into a hole in the wall at 65 MPH.

I lived in Bedford for a long time.

Used to work at the Ticketmaster in the Toys R Us just off the Bedford North Exit.

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (aYkrr)

415 Re: Who dis?

Hanoi-ing Jane was a cutie. A pity she was dropped on her head when she was born.

But I still liked her in the opening credits of Barbarella.

Posted by: TXNick77 at March 13, 2019 12:18 PM (mYjhh)

416 "Mission Impossible: Fallout on 4K for cheap."

yeah, it was $2.49, and I had $2 credit for foregoing the 2 day Amazon delivery (takes a few extra days, order each item separately, get $1 credit for each).

I commented on it the other day, the theme of "save your friend, give up the plutonium and kill millions". Ace disagreed with me, saying it was not a political message, I was too late to see that to respond then.

But if you watch it, see if you think it is not the most serious "meme" deliberately delivered in the movie. I thought it reflected the Obama theme of "if we can save one illegal child, we should surrender the nation".

Whether political or not, it seemed odd to me that both his higher ups praised him for that attitude in the beginning , then at the end. And it was supported in the middle with a deliberate scene with the cute French cop, to reinforce the point, imo. Except for the end scene with the ex, it was probably the most deliberate messaging in the movie. But it was a real enjoyable movie, in any case.

Posted by: illiniwek at March 13, 2019 12:18 PM (Cus5s)

417
Pixy, please feed you hamsters. This "getting rejected because of too many spaces" when there aren't too many spaces is a gigantic PIA.
Please fix.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy says #PurgeProgressivism at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM

There are certain words that will bring up that message. Some of them include:

blaz*r
ni&gga
*blue-blood*d (that one I can't figure out)

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 12:18 PM (jYje5)

418 So- basically Manafort is a political prisoner who got put in prison for tax evasion, and being associated with Trump. Mostly, being associated with Trump.

Most people pay a fine and move on with their lives.

A lot of people lauding this today, will be sorry in the future when this boomerangs around.

Posted by: Marcus T at March 13, 2019 12:18 PM (VpIIl)

419 413 Howdy y'all!

Hope y'all are behaving and keeping the real
World together.

Smooches!
Posted by: nurse ratched at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (NMwvZ)

Super Nurse!

How are you and Insom?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:18 PM (bcbK8)

420 That actually sounds like the one Harlan Ellison wrote: Idiot salesman
driving with his wife, gets cut off, goes into road rage and it turns
out the the guy he challenges to fight it out is one of the top
duellists in the country. Zany hijinks ensue.

Yep, that one was Ellison. "Along the Scenic Route".

I don't know if it was published elsewhere but I have it as part of a collection, "Car Sinister", edited by Robert Silverberg, Martin harry Greenberg and Joseph D. Olander, Avon, July 1979.

Unfortunately, the paperback's getting a bit yellow. It does have one of my favorite auto-related quotes: "Any grampa with his mind on his dyspepsia ought to be able to score six car lengths per block"...

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM guy at March 13, 2019 12:18 PM (7s3Gx)

421
Smooches!
Posted by: nurse ratched at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (NMwvZ)

SO!???

How was the weekend??!!???

Posted by: Tyrone at March 13, 2019 12:19 PM (9gDA7)

422 re: Autoduel

391 I have always wanted a Supercharged Pontiac JJ - but now the company is gone.

(Alas I cannot find the story that is from, I am convinced it was Larry Niven.)

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 **He didn't often write stories with regular 20th century cars in them. Do you recall the title of it?

That was a short story by Alan Dean Foster in one of his compilations, IIRC. "If Johny Can't Drive" or something like that.

The Pontiac JJ (dad) took out a Cadillac "Marauder" (who took out the son's VW bug).

Posted by: s_tenhoff at March 13, 2019 12:19 PM (NmR1a)

423
The appearance of this stupid new 'Bulwark' thing is useful insofar as it tells you that the only thing many conservatives think is worth conserving is their own paycheck.

The Bulwark is simply first among equals on the island of defrocked thought leaders.

"Someday, someday, we'll be back in charge and THEN you'll see some wicked retribution, proles!"

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at March 13, 2019 12:19 PM (pNxlR)

424 DAMN you sock.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 12:19 PM (9gDA7)

425 To be fair, if the US and USSR had wanted a Practice Annihilation we would have chosen an away game and it would have been on top of her dainty Kraut self.
Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 12:15 PM (fuK7c)

-------

Eh. We did our practice runs in deserts and at sea. Any exchange of nuclear arms would have been "game on."

And we did that to protect the free world, so that people like her wouldn't have to live like the ones a couple of miles away, past that wall.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at March 13, 2019 12:19 PM (hkrxT)

426 >>How was the weekend??!!???

Sticky.

Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 12:19 PM (aYkrr)

427 The short story ended, "be careful, drive offensively" or something like that.

Posted by: s_tenhoff at March 13, 2019 12:20 PM (NmR1a)

428 Smooches!
Posted by: nurse ratched at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (NMwvZ)

SO!???

How was the weekend??!!???
Posted by: Tyrone at March 13, 2019 12:19 PM (9gDA7)

----------------------------

Sounds like it was planned to be more like a week than just a weekend.

Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 12:21 PM (ffYR/)

429
Sticky.
Posted by: garrett at March 13, 2019 12:19 PM (aYkrr)

KY can get that way.......I've heard.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 12:21 PM (9gDA7)

430 CBS staff panic as they look at $100 million in cuts.

http://tinyurl.com/y5pj7yss

Posted by: Ha at March 13, 2019 12:22 PM (MAstk)

431 Warai-otoko horses I get had 3 of the hay burners for years, Unicorns are beyond my comprehension

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 12:22 PM (uSoVh)

432 CBS staff panic as they look at $100 million in cuts.
=========

Awwww. That's too bad.

Posted by: bicentennialguy at March 13, 2019 12:23 PM (vg8iE)

433 Heh, both "Along the Scenic Route" and "Why Johnny Can't Speed" sound entertaining.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:23 PM (W+vEI)

434 I remember for a brief time there was a dashboard mounted machine gun toy that would make a satisfying "PEW PEW PEW!" sound that you could press when you were in traffic. It was cool.

now that the Anti-Gun warriors dominate everything, that kind of thing has been disappeared completely.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:23 PM (Kpl3J)

435 419 413 Howdy y'all!

Hope y'all are behaving and keeping the real
World together.

Smooches!
Posted by: nurse ratched at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (NMwvZ)

Super Nurse!

How are you and Insom?
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:18 PM (bcbK

We're great! Quick question...what's the closest non-extradition country? There was a bit of an incident involving roast bald eagle and forgetting to separate the recyclables.

Posted by: Insomniac at March 13, 2019 12:23 PM (NMwvZ)

436 371
One driverless car CEO promoted driverless car cameras because they could be activated when there's an amber alert.

------

1-877-Kars-For-Kids

K A R S

Kars for Kids

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at March 13, 2019 12:09 PM (hkrxT)

Or turned off when the Government wants you to stay put.

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 12:24 PM (ymnmz)

437 Quick question...what's the closest non-extradition country? There was a bit of an incident involving roast bald eagle and forgetting to separate the recyclables.
Posted by: Insomniac

One of the African shitholes.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 12:24 PM (LHT0w)

438 CBS staff panic as they look at $100 million in cuts.

http://tinyurl.com/y5pj7yss

Posted by: Ha at March 13, 2019 12:22 PM

************

Bwahahahahahaa!!!!!!!!

I'm thinking someone's kids are not getting into Harvard.

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 12:25 PM (0tfLf)

439 >>CBS staff panic as they look at $100 million in cuts.

So maybe just fire a few of their top-tier on-air talent?

I'm thinking of how much NBC (unintentionally?) saved by firing Lauer and MeAgain Kelley.. .

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:25 PM (W+vEI)

440 431
CBS staff panic as they look at $100 million in cuts.

http://tinyurl.com/y5pj7yss

Posted by: Ha at March 13, 2019 12:22 PM (MAstk)

Stiffer than a fourth grade buss ride.

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 12:25 PM (ymnmz)

441 I remember for a brief time there was a dashboard mounted machine gun toy that would make a satisfying "PEW PEW PEW!" sound that you could press when you were in traffic. It was cool.

now that the Anti-Gun warriors dominate everything, that kind of thing has been disappeared completely.
Posted by: Tom Servo

Check Spencer's Gifts in a mall.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 12:25 PM (LHT0w)

442 Around here the Mercedes version of Onstar (COMAND) was used in a carjacking that took a kid off in the backseat. The cops turned it on and listened. They caught the guys and saved the kid.

This was YEARS ago.

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 12:25 PM (9VeU0)

443 what's the closest non-extradition country?

*********

Peruvia, if you bring cash.

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:25 PM (m45I2)

444 And we did that to protect the free world, so that people like her wouldn't have to live like the ones a couple of miles away, past that wall.

I'm aware of that and thrilled that we won the Cold War and that Wall is a distant memory. Yay us!

And I'm just pedantic enough to point out that 99 Luftballons wasn't about a bipolar war.

"99 War Ministers, a match and a gasoline can, thought themselves clever people, got a scent of war bounty..."

It's generally anti-war and about how a simple misunderstanding (unrecognized balloons coming over the horizon) can lead to the unfathomable.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 12:26 PM (fuK7c)

445 I absolutely loved Diamond-P sports - remember them??? I can't believe nobody is doing that, I could not give a shit about all of this yackety yack yack yack they put on supposed sports channels today.

of course the best sports show of all time was Takeshi's Castle.
Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:14 PM (Kpl3J)

Has anyone else noticed the disproportionate amount of black hosts on the sports channels? I think the purpose is to impose their presence on White people to rub in the fact that they are being demographically dispossessed. But, I think the logic among those that don't see this is, "Well, blacks are more prevalent in high visibility sports ball franchises, so, it's only fair that they are more prevalent in reporting and commenting about such shit!" Of course, blacks must be numerically superior in fields they dominate, but Whites must provide them set-asides in areas they don't. Hey, it's only fair!

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at March 13, 2019 12:26 PM (3sjI6)

446 404
368 Great short story by Alan Dean Foster about armed sedans auto
dueling on the LA Freeway. It's in one of his short story collections,
either 'With Friends Like These' or 'Who Needs Enemies'.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:03 PM (bcbK

That actually sounds like the one Harlan Ellison wrote: Idiot
salesman driving with his wife, gets cut off, goes into road rage and it
turns out the the guy he challenges to fight it out is one of the top
duellists in the country. Zany hijinks ensue.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:08 PM (h1Jye)

Very similar.

Foster's is about a father avenging his son who challenged a
better-armed driver. He guns up and hunts down the Caddy driver who
killed his boy.

Good stuff.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019
*
*
. . .
Ah. I often confuse Foster with Larry Niven, partly because of writing style, and because he adapted many of the Star Trek: Animated episodes into novels/novelettes. And one of them, "The Slaver Weapon," was written by Niven based on his own early short story. (Very good ST script, by the way. Spock, Sulu, and Uhura vs. the catlike aliens the kzinti.)

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at March 13, 2019 12:27 PM (elsTe)

447 >How was the weekend??!!???

Sticky.
Posted by: garrett

I was thinking more sweaty.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:27 PM (gLMhO)

448 We would be so much better off if America would just mind it's own business, and let those determined to suffer have at it.

Posted by: The Artist Formerly Known as SD at March 13, 2019 12:22 PM (HOye3

-------

Oh yeah. Those nerds didn't deserve or respect our help. But we had to draw a line somewhere to protect our own shit, and that line was the Fulda Gap.

The Western Europeans were our buffer, and benefitted hugely from that. They got to prance around in blissful ignorance of things like self-defense and national responsibility as a result. It's not been great for them or us.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at March 13, 2019 12:28 PM (hkrxT)

449
My current car has enough of the gadgets. It's stimulus overload. Steering wheel covered with up and down arrow options. Touch screen display has thousands of options, some nestled 10 levels deep. It came with something like six manuals to study. One manual is about 800 pages long.

I may never buy a new car again. The recent time change on the display took five minutes of searching to discover. I'm getting too old to learn a new car.

Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 12:28 PM (jYje5)

450 The Pepsi Generation will save us.

Thought I read that GM was doing away with all internal combustion cars, according to the new ECOCEO

Posted by: NOT THAT GUY at March 13, 2019 12:28 PM (09siJ)

451 412
This excerpt:

He activated the roof turret, an expensive option, but one which
had proven its worth time and again. Myrtle had opted for the big
grenade launcher, but Frank and the GM salesman bad convinced her that
while showiness might be fine for impressing the neighbors, on the road
it was performance that counted. The twin fifties in the turret
commenced hammering away at the Cad, nicking big chips of

armorglass and battle sheathing from its front.

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (9VeU0)

Loved the oil slick options

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 12:28 PM (ymnmz)

452 insomniac, tell me roasting bald eagle is a metaphor!?

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:29 PM (gLMhO)

453 CBS staff panic as they look at $100 million in cuts.
=========

The death by a 100
million cuts! Ah, financial Lingchi for MSM is a good thing, Grasshopper.

"Lingchi... translated variously as the slow process, the lingering death, or slow slicing, and also known as death by a thousand cuts, was a form of torture and execution used in China from roughly 900 CE until it was banned in 1905....

Lingchi was reserved for crimes viewed as especially severe, such as treason. Some Westerners were executed in this manner. Even after the practice was outlawed, the concept itself has still appeared across many types of media."

-- Wikipedia

Posted by: Hands at March 13, 2019 12:29 PM (786Ro)

454 442
I remember for a brief time there was a dashboard mounted machine gun
toy that would make a satisfying "PEW PEW PEW!" sound that you could
press when you were in traffic. It was cool.

now that the Anti-Gun warriors dominate everything, that kind of thing has been disappeared completely.

Posted by: Tom Servo

Check Spencer's Gifts in a mall.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 12:25 PM (LHT0w)
Spencer's is easy to find. It is like the only store left in any mall.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 12:29 PM (jxbfJ)

455
Stephanie Myers @_StephanieMyers
1h
Judge Amy Berman Jackson said today's sentencing in the Paul Manafort case "will not incriminate anyone" in the ongoing investigation.

Posted by: AOCD at March 13, 2019 12:29 PM (BqBId)

456 452 412
This excerpt:

He activated the roof turret, an expensive option, but one which
had proven its worth time and again. Myrtle had opted for the big
grenade launcher, but Frank and the GM salesman bad convinced her that
while showiness might be fine for impressing the neighbors, on the road
it was performance that counted. The twin fifties in the turret
commenced hammering away at the Cad, nicking big chips of

armorglass and battle sheathing from its front.

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (9VeU0)

Loved the oil slick options
Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 12:28 PM (ymnmz)

I'm a caltrops man myself but you light that oil slick on fire, you got something.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:29 PM (bcbK8)

457 443 Around here the Mercedes version of Onstar (COMAND) was used in a carjacking that took a kid off in the backseat. The cops turned it on and listened. They caught the guys and saved the kid.

told mrs. chronda last night that the dna databases will get *really* interesting when bill collectors start using them to find relatives of the folks that owe them money.

she was skeptical, but i think it's inevitable.

Posted by: Anachronda at March 13, 2019 12:30 PM (sGtp+)

458 The FBI says actress Lori Loughlin (LAWK'-lin) has been taken into custody in connection with a scheme in which wealthy parents paid bribes to get their children into top colleges.

FBI spokeswoman Laura Eimiller says Loughlin is in custody Wednesday morning in Los Angeles. She is scheduled to appear in court there in the afternoon.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:30 PM (+y/Ru)

459 (not even forgiving the nurse and insomniac for roasting a bald eagle)

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:30 PM (gLMhO)

460 451 The Pepsi Generation will save us.

Thought I read that GM was doing away with all internal combustion cars, according to the new ECOCEO
Posted by: NOT THAT GUY at March 13, 2019 12:28 PM (09siJ)

Well, I think it's more "we'll do away with internal combustion cars by 20mumble, although that's a self-imposed deadline and mumble mumble." I doubt anybody is going to hold them to that.

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 12:30 PM (RD7QR)

461 Insomniac !

You're alive !

Posted by: JT at March 13, 2019 12:30 PM (nubzz)

462 CBS staff panic as they look at $100 million in cuts.

http://tinyurl.com/y5pj7yss
Posted by: Ha at March 13, 2019 12:22 PM (MAstk)

That post made my day. The only thing better would be NBC. As a side comment I had read somewhere that Zirinsky, the new President of the news division has been refereed to as the wine maker. She loves crushing grapes

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 12:31 PM (uSoVh)

463 JT, currently, i'm waiting on the roasted bald eagle story.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:31 PM (gLMhO)

464 maybe the bald eagle is a type of fish?

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:32 PM (gLMhO)

465 465 maybe the bald eagle is a type of fish?

not a weasel? *checks AoS style guide*

Posted by: Anachronda at March 13, 2019 12:32 PM (sGtp+)

466 nope eagles eat fish tho.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:32 PM (gLMhO)

467 436 419 413 Howdy y'all!

Hope y'all are behaving and keeping the real
World together.

Smooches!
Posted by: nurse ratched at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (NMwvZ)

Super Nurse!

How are you and Insom?
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:18 PM (bcbK

We're great! Quick question...what's the closest non-extradition country? There was a bit of an incident involving roast bald eagle and forgetting to separate the recyclables.
Posted by: Insomniac at March 13, 2019 12:23 PM (NMwvZ)

Well for recycling crimes, you gotta go to Mexico. Canada gives the death penalty for not sorting.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:32 PM (bcbK8)

468 I doubt it would be a good idea to look up "roasted the bald eagle" on the Urban Dictionary.

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM (RD7QR)

469 The inside word when they picked up ST

for a third season was that it would be with a massive budget cut.Fuck CBS and its employees.

Posted by: steevy at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM (BXMxN)

470 Anacronda, never do that!

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM (gLMhO)

471 JT, currently, i'm waiting on the roasted bald eagle story.

Maybe it was a celebrity roast.

Posted by: JT at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM (nubzz)

472 464 JT, currently, i'm waiting on the roasted bald eagle ~~story~~ recipe.

Posted by: willow

fixt

Posted by: Anachronda at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM (sGtp+)

473 i'm waiting on the roasted bald eagle story

It was divine, with snail darter ceviche and a whooping crane reduction.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM (fuK7c)

474 Loved the oil slick options
Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless

Cannibalize a windshield washer reservoir from a junk car. Hook it up under your back bumper with the nozzles pointing out & upward.

Fill with clean motor oil.

First car that tailgates/chases you, hit a couple of sprays.

When they go to use the wipers....

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM (LHT0w)

475 Blaster, what are you doing?

"The blood-red Mercury with the twin-mounted 7.6 mm Spandaus cut George off as he was shifting lanes..."

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent at December 03, 2016 01:36 PM (UUFoE)

You credited text to me I didn't write at a time not yet reached in this thread and that isn't my hash...

Careful with the attributions, please.

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM guy at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM (7s3Gx)

476 Posted by: nurse ratched at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (NMwvZ)

Posted by: Insomniac at March 13, 2019 12:23 PM (NMwvZ)

*********

Aww, how cute! Matching hashes.

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM (m45I2)

477 Thought I read that GM was doing away with all internal combustion cars, according to the new ECOCEO

-
And Dick's will stop selling all guns. Both brilliant business plans.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM (+y/Ru)

478 Re the college admissions scandal -

Can someone please explain what laws the parents are alleged to have broken? What they did is definitely slimey, but I guess I was unaware that there are criminal laws against lying on college applications. Or did they do more than lie on the applications?

Posted by: biancaneve at March 13, 2019 12:34 PM (hkMx0)

479 joncelli, internet has wrecked our minds.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:34 PM (gLMhO)

480 Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (jYje5)

Yoga and Aerobics does wonders for MILFs

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (bcbK
Just one more reason to go to the gym.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 11:27 AM (jxbfJ)

Well that and never really having to work a day in your life.

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 12:34 PM (ymnmz)

481 Muldoon, I hope one of them didn't killthe other hash and taking over their essence.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:34 PM (gLMhO)

482 458 The FBI says actress Lori Loughlin (LAWK'-lin) has been taken into custody in connection with a scheme in which wealthy parents paid bribes to get their children into top colleges.

FBI spokeswoman Laura Eimiller says Loughlin is in custody Wednesday morning in Los Angeles. She is scheduled to appear in court there in the afternoon.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:30 PM (+y/Ru)

Oh to be a fly on the wall during the body cavity search.

*bites lip*

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:35 PM (bcbK8)

483 478 Re the college admissions scandal -

Can someone please explain what laws the parents are alleged to have broken? What they did is definitely slimey, but I guess I was unaware that there are criminal laws against lying on college applications. Or did they do more than lie on the applications?
Posted by: biancaneve at March 13, 2019 12:34 PM (hkMx0)

There was bribery too.

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 12:35 PM (RD7QR)

484 Mark admit it you want to do the cavity search.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:35 PM (gLMhO)

485 480 Posted by: Newest Nic at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (jYje5)

Yoga and Aerobics does wonders for MILFs

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:26 AM (bcbK
Just one more reason to go to the gym.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 11:27 AM (jxbfJ)

Well that and never really having to work a day in your life.
Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 12:34 PM (ymnmz)

True, time and money help too. But they still have to be willing to put in the sweat equity.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:35 PM (bcbK8)

486 484 Mark admit it you want to do the cavity search.
Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:35 PM (gLMhO)

I do. I'll be gentle, nibble at her neck, lots of eye contact and I'll hold her afterwards.

But I REALLY want to do that body cavity search

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:36 PM (bcbK8)

487 Can someone please explain what laws the parents are alleged to have broken? What they did is definitely slimey, but I guess I was unaware that there are criminal laws against lying on college applications. Or did they do more than lie on the applications?
Posted by: biancaneve at March 13, 2019 12:34 PM (hkMx0)

There was bribery too.
Posted by: joncelli,

Conspiracy. Racketeering. Mail Fraud.

Posted by: rickb223 at March 13, 2019 12:36 PM (LHT0w)

488 biana, I think they were also paying others to take the entrance exams.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:36 PM (gLMhO)

489 >>Can someone please explain what laws the parents are alleged to have broken? What they did is definitely slimey, but I guess I was unaware that there are criminal laws against lying on college applications. Or did they do more than lie on the applications?

Thought I saw something about mail fraud?

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:37 PM (W+vEI)

490 My son thinks all cars should come with an exploding headrest. It would be triggered by calling the license plate number by cell phone. Only certain people, like him, would have the proper phones.

Posted by: NOT THAT GUY at March 13, 2019 12:37 PM (09siJ)

491 slaps Mark for Lori.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:37 PM (gLMhO)

492 "horses I get had 3 of the hay burners for years, Unicorns are beyond my comprehension"Posted by: Sock monkey wanted

ha, good term. My one uncles thought it kinda crazy for people to keep horses, since we have tractors. They knew how much work it was to keep them ... still is.

One friend, kept her horse for like 35 years, mostly just retired for the last ten, and she paid for a nice stable and pasture. Very expensive indeed ... that is love and commitment.

Posted by: illiniwek at March 13, 2019 12:37 PM (Cus5s)

493 Can someone please explain what laws the parents are
alleged to have broken? What they did is definitely slimey, but I
guess I was unaware that there are criminal laws against lying on
college applications. Or did they do more than lie on the applications?

Posted by: biancaneve at March 13, 2019 12:34 PM (hkMx0)

---

I'm kind of curious about this, too. Do college applications carry the weight of a sworn statement or something?

Now I can see how the colleges should be paying millions in fines and have administrators going to jail, but I'm not clear on the FBI level stuff the parents were doing.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Gaze upon my twerks, ye mighty. And despair. at March 13, 2019 12:37 PM (xyung)

494 458
The FBI says actress Lori Loughlin (LAWK'-lin) has been taken into
custody in connection with a scheme in which wealthy parents paid bribes
to get their children into top colleges.

FBI spokeswoman Laura Eimiller says Loughlin is in custody Wednesday
morning in Los Angeles. She is scheduled to appear in court there in
the afternoon.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:30 PM (+y/Ru)

Is she the only one in custody or did all 33 get to visit the Greybar Hotel, for mughots at least?

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 12:37 PM (ymnmz)

495 Also taking tax deductions for fake charities i.e. the bribes?

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:38 PM (W+vEI)

496 Seems to me, of the photographed, the wrong one is dead.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 11:32 AM (9gDA7)

nah, steak is best dead. but not cooked more than medium.

otherwise that's a hanging offence.

Posted by: SturmToddler at March 13, 2019 12:38 PM (8D42x)

497 writes a list in case I want to be a criminal,
never write a check
never use snail mail, or any mail don't even text

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:38 PM (gLMhO)

498 Ow. Willow...

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:39 PM (bcbK8)

499 Illegal Alien Bernie Sanders Aide Apologizes After Questioning If Jews Have Dual Loyalties

-
I knew about the anti-Jewish posts but didn't know it was illegal alien. That's some mighty fine leadership there, Bernie.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:39 PM (+y/Ru)

500 serves you right.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:39 PM (gLMhO)

501 nah, steak is best dead.

Almost dead is close enough.

The herbed butter is a great addition.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at March 13, 2019 12:39 PM (fuK7c)

502 491
My son thinks all cars should come with an exploding headrest. It would
be triggered by calling the license plate number by cell phone. Only
certain people, like him, would have the proper phones.

Posted by: NOT THAT GUY at March 13, 2019 12:37 PM (09siJ)

LOL Sounds like every socialist plan I have ever heard of.
Everyone has to put their nuts in the vice, BUT I, and I alone get to turn the handle.

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 12:39 PM (ymnmz)

503 REFORGER was before my time - but man, did the NCOs have stories about what a cluster that was going to be.

If
the supposedly declassified shit I've read is true - hoo boy. Nobody
was going to survive. Widespread tactical nukes - the USSR willing to
sacrifice an entire first wave of infantry to radiation sickness. That
entire continent was going to be wiped.

Posted by: The Artist Formerly Known as SD at March 13, 2019 12:35 PM (L97Gl)
-------------------

I participated in REFORGER 1972. It was every pit of the cluster fuck you could imagine.

Posted by: NOT THAT GUY at March 13, 2019 12:40 PM (09siJ)

504 447 >How was the weekend??!!???
Sticky.

Posted by: garrett

I was thinking more sweaty.
Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:27 PM (gLMhO)

Hey! I'm EATING here!

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:40 PM (h1Jye)

505 so anyway hopw long or shallow is this frauding , at least these people were willing to shell out cash for their kids unlike others, and not like Lizzy warren.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:40 PM (gLMhO)

506 About the need for self driving cars...... The disabled among us that do not drive because it would put us and others in danger would dearly love to have our freedom back. We really really hate not driving.

Posted by: USNtakim profoundly deplorable. at March 13, 2019 12:40 PM (0OmEj)

507 Fonda wasn't too bad in Cat Ballou.

Posted by: davidt at March 13, 2019 12:40 PM (Pp8LH)

508 477 Thought I read that GM was doing away with all internal combustion cars, according to the new ECOCEO
-
And Dick's will stop selling all guns. Both brilliant business plans.

As has been said of some other companies, GM is fast turning into a Pension Plan that happens to make a few cars.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:40 PM (Kpl3J)

509 Also taking tax deductions for fake charities i.e. the bribes?
Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:38 PM (W+vEI)

-------------------

Yep. They stepped into a whole raft of charges in the name of getting their little darlings a good start on life, which has also now been wrecked.

Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 12:40 PM (ffYR/)

510 Now I can see how the colleges should be paying millions in fines and have administrators going to jail, but I'm not clear on the FBI level stuff the parents were doing.
Posted by: Moron Robbie - Gaze upon my twerks, ye mighty. And despair. at March 13, 2019 12:37 PM

The Feds luuuuvvvvvv those high-profile arrests.

Posted by: Hands at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM (786Ro)

511 And Dick's will stop selling all guns. Both brilliant business plans.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM (+y/Ru)
--------

Not all, just 125 locations where sales are going down probably in liberal areas.

But hears the thing. If Dick's they'll satisfy the anti-gun crowd, they're kidding themselves. The beast continually needs to be fed.

Posted by: WisRich at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM (G0vdT)

512 Regardless of their knowledge of the fraud, every single one of these students must be expelled forthwith, on principle. They are in school as a result of criminal fraud. It really doesn't matter if they knew or not. They can't be allowed to continue to benefit from a crime.

Posted by: Rusty Nail at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM (ju9gW)

513 Willow is certainly feisty this morning.

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM (h1Jye)

514 Oregon, what's the matte you can't do two things at once?

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM (gLMhO)

515 "My son thinks all cars should come with an exploding headrest."

those are in the new models, but as with the NSA collecting everything, they think it best not to tell us. (don't worry, they have the switch and would never use it on citizens, just like they would never spy on , or"wiretap" Trump Tower ... even though that is how Mueller gets all his intel on his "friends of Trump" enemies list)

Posted by: illiniwek at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM (Cus5s)

516 Oregon, I am, forgive me! I call it my friday!

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM (gLMhO)

517 Fonda wasn't too bad in Cat Ballou.

-
Cat Ballou is a good movie. There. I said it.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:42 PM (+y/Ru)

518 You credited text to me I didn't write at a time not yet reached in this thread and that isn't my hash...

Careful with the attributions, please.
Posted by: Additional Blond Agent

*********

Loosen your waistband. You checked the timestamp but apparently didn't check the date. Those quotes were from December 2016.

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:42 PM (m45I2)

519 509
Also taking tax deductions for fake charities i.e. the bribes?

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:38 PM (W+vEI)

-------------------

Yep. They stepped into a whole raft of charges in the name of
getting their little darlings a good start on life, which has also now
been wrecked.

Posted by: Calm Mentor at March 13, 2019 12:40 PM (ffYR/)
Perpetrated by people who stood up for #equality. The irony is delicious.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 12:43 PM (jxbfJ)

520 do not make me stop this car.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:43 PM (gLMhO)

521 But hears the thing. If Dick's they'll satisfy the
anti-gun crowd, they're kidding themselves. The beast continually needs
to be fed.

Posted by: WisRich at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM

The PETA people will come for Dick's fishing rods next. Let's watch them fold again.

Posted by: Rusty Nail at March 13, 2019 12:43 PM (ju9gW)

522 Some young idiot, clearly born after 9/11, suggested in the Vox Populi section of our fish wrap today, this:

"Forget the dumb wall. Abolish the department of Homeland Security."

Proving once again, we aren't anywhere near approaching Peak Stupidity.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at March 13, 2019 11:34 AM (ptqGC)

tbh, I do agree with that sentiment, but for entirely different reasons.

Posted by: SturmToddler at March 13, 2019 12:43 PM (8D42x)

523 479 joncelli, internet has wrecked our minds.
Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:34 PM (gLMhO)

Well, mine came pre-wrecked but the internet definitely doesn't help.

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 12:44 PM (RD7QR)

524 521
But hears the thing. If Dick's they'll satisfy the

anti-gun crowd, they're kidding themselves. The beast continually needs

to be fed.

Posted by: WisRich at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM

The PETA people will come for Dick's fishing rods next. Let's watch them fold again.

Posted by: Rusty Nail at March 13, 2019 12:43 PM (ju9gW)
Hopefully people will stop buying firearms at these big box retailers. Visit the locally owned shops. So much more knowledgeable, some may even have a range to try the firearm out.Now, I'll go to Wallyworld and buy range ammo because it is cheap.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 12:45 PM (jxbfJ)

525 512
Regardless of their knowledge of the fraud, every single one of these
students must be expelled forthwith, on principle. They are in school as
a result of criminal fraud. It really doesn't matter if they knew or
not. They can't be allowed to continue to benefit from a crime.

Posted by: Rusty Nail at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM (ju9gW)

Give em all workstudy jobs for the remainder of their time there. Cleaning toilets in the dorms and sling hash in the cafeteria's

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 12:45 PM (ymnmz)

526 As long as you're posting commie traitor pictures, I hear that Ethel Rosenberg was quite the looker.
Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM (TpAxy)

Her last engagement was as a conductor.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 12:45 PM (nPGq2)

527 516 Oregon, I am, forgive me! I call it my friday!
Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM (gLMhO)

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:45 PM (h1Jye)

528 From the Babylon Bee:

Politics

Make-A-Wish Foundation Grants Terminally Ill Child Chance To View Mueller Report Before She Passes

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:46 PM (+y/Ru)

529 joncelli, pshh, never admit that, it's the internet, and aces, but mainly the internet, and maybe you, but why blame yourself, when there is so many of us to blame?

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:46 PM (gLMhO)

530 527 516 Oregon, I am, forgive me! I call it my friday!
Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:41 PM (gLMhO)

You get to have Friday on Wednesday?

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:46 PM (h1Jye)

531 >>About the need for self driving cars...... The disabled among us that do not drive because it would put us and others in danger would dearly love to have our freedom back. We really really hate not driving.

Ugh, yes! Good point - That's where they would mean freedom.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:46 PM (W+vEI)

532 Oregon, I am, forgive me! I call it my friday!
Posted by: willow

When you set yer clock ahead, you don't mess around !

Posted by: JT at March 13, 2019 12:47 PM (nubzz)

533 526
As long as you're posting commie traitor pictures, I hear that Ethel Rosenberg was quite the looker.

Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM (TpAxy)

Her last engagement was as a conductor.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 12:45 PM (nPGq2)

Shocking!

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 12:47 PM (jxbfJ)

534 @475 note the quote is from 2016!

Posted by: blaster at March 13, 2019 12:47 PM (v+fx/)

535 526 As long as you're posting commie traitor pictures, I hear that Ethel Rosenberg was quite the looker.
Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM (TpAxy)

Her last engagement was as a conductor.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 12:45 PM (nPGq2)

And try the veal!

Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 12:47 PM (RD7QR)

536 Just refreshed the page to find I'm now about 45min behind, not quite 200 comments.

Ace's self-driving chariot should be arriving any moment.

The rain has stopped and I have stuff I oughttado.

Like go back and read the Morning Report.

In case I'm gone after this, G'day, y'all.

Posted by: mindful webworker - click for self-driving car toon series at March 13, 2019 12:47 PM (jMD9L)

537 uh oh spouse is looking over my shoulder now, I must have snickered out loud.

folds hands in lap.

Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:47 PM (gLMhO)

538 Her last engagement was as a conductor.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon

*********

Heh-

Viva l' Resistance!

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:47 PM (m45I2)

539 Jane Fonda is living proof that you don't have to like a girl to want to fuck her.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM (bcbK

That photo probably predates her becoming a traitor, as did her fine work in Barbarella, IIRC.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 12:47 PM (nPGq2)

540 As long as you're posting commie traitor pictures, I hear that Ethel Rosenberg was quite the looker.
Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM

=====

Her last engagement was as a conductor.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 12:45 PM

I heard she'd joined the resistance.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at March 13, 2019 12:48 PM (/29pe)

541 The admissions scandal - lying isn't necessarily against the law, but when you combine lying with a lot of money changing hands, that is where a whole bunch of laws start to come into play. Mail Fraud, Wire Fraud, Racketeering, and Conspiracy to Commit all three.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:48 PM (Kpl3J)

542 I heard she'd joined the resistance.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at March 13, 2019 12:48 PM

She broke every law but Ohm's.

Posted by: Rusty Nail at March 13, 2019 12:49 PM (ju9gW)

543 Yes it is very courageous apparently for boys pretending to be girls to be dominating girls sports...

https://pjmedia.com/instapundit/324245/

Posted by: steevy at March 13, 2019 12:49 PM (BXMxN)

544 531
>>About the need for self driving cars...... The disabled among us
that do not drive because it would put us and others in danger would
dearly love to have our freedom back. We really really hate not driving.

Ugh, yes! Good point - That's where they would mean freedom.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:46 PM (W+vEI)

They aren't self driving cars. They are government driven cars. It wouldn't mean freedom, it would mean begging permission from someone to go somewhere. Remember, AOC will be deciding how far you can roam and if its a "useful" energy consumption.

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 12:49 PM (ymnmz)

545 Scarlett Johansson and John Malkovich.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at March 13, 2019 12:49 PM (/qEW2)

546 Watt's so funny about that?

Posted by: Zombie Ethel R at March 13, 2019 12:49 PM (Pp8LH)

547 The PETA people will come for Dick's fishing rods next. Let's watch them fold again.

Women's Jockstraps. It will be a thing.

That sidebar piece on the basketball teams is illustrative. The LGBTQWERTY tribe is going to chase women out of sports. The upside of this is that no one is going to pay to watch trannies play each other, so the "women's" leagues will go bankrupt.

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 12:49 PM (8erNz)

548 The admissions scandal - lying isn't necessarily against the law, but when you combine lying with a lot of money changing hands, that is where a whole bunch of laws start to come into play. Mail Fraud, Wire Fraud, Racketeering, and Conspiracy to Commit all three.
Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:48 PM (Kpl3J)

That's great, but with all the corruption in Government right now and MASSIVE crimes committed unpunished, I really seriously give a flying fuck about rich people stupidly spending too much money to get their kids further indoctrinated as there are MUCH bigger fish to fry.

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 12:50 PM (9gDA7)

549 Her last engagement was as a conductor.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 12:45 PM

I heard she'd joined the resistance.
Posted by: Duncanthrax

********

Wow, you guys are really up on current events.

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:50 PM (m45I2)

550 Her last engagement was as a conductor.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 12:45 PM

I heard she'd joined the resistance.
Posted by: Duncanthrax at March 13, 2019 12:48 PM (/29pe)

She inducted herself!

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at March 13, 2019 12:50 PM (h1Jye)

551 Fenelon this one is for you. A little bit of good old (kinda, sorta) praise the gospel which speaks a bit to your last post

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ACJt5wwrDdI

Posted by: Sock monkey wanted: organ grinder, willing to train at March 13, 2019 12:51 PM (uSoVh)

552 The upside of this is that no one is going to pay to watch trannies play each other, so the "women's" leagues will go bankrupt.

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 12:49 PM

Not trying to piss anyone off here, but who is paying to watch women's sports right now? Outside of tennis and ice skating, anyway.

Posted by: Rusty Nail at March 13, 2019 12:51 PM (ju9gW)

553 As long as you're posting commie traitor pictures, I hear that Ethel Rosenberg was quite the looker.
Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM (TpAxy)

Her last engagement was as a conductor.

-
Smokin' hot!

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:51 PM (+y/Ru)

554 She broke every law but Ohm's.
Posted by: Rusty Nail at March 13, 2019 12:49 PM (ju9gW)

Bad
Boys
Rape
Young
Girls
But
Violet
Gives
Willingly

Posted by: Sponge at March 13, 2019 12:51 PM (9gDA7)

555 The upside of this is that no one is going to pay to watch trannies play each other, so the "women's" leagues will go bankrupt.
Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 12:49 PM

You will be made to watch, Comrade!

Posted by: AOC at March 13, 2019 12:52 PM (g4Ywf)

556 One good thing about the admissions scandal is that it hits the big shots' social status.

Posted by: davidt at March 13, 2019 12:52 PM (Pp8LH)

557
That's great, but with all the corruption in Government right now and MASSIVE crimes committed unpunished, I really seriously give a flying fuck about rich people stupidly spending too much money to get their kids further indoctrinated as there are MUCH bigger fish to fry."

Next you'll say that it was stupid for the Feds to worry so much about a group of people who had odd religious idea who lived out in the countryside near Waco, and who never bothered anybody, just mostly kept to themselves.

Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:52 PM (Kpl3J)

558 Read a funny twitter thread likening these kids to "Dreamers" who were dragged into these schools illegally by their parents, and it's not really "fair" that they should have to leave --- they have dreams of being doctors and such!

Yes, to those Lefties upset by these kids: why is their illegal invasion of USC and Yale so much worse than Dreamers? And don;t say financial privilege, because the kids who got to college legitimately have "academic privilege," right?

Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:53 PM (W+vEI)

559 So if you were being electrocuted would it be better not to resist?

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:53 PM (m45I2)

560 Posted by: nurse ratched at March 13, 2019 12:17 PM (NMwvZ)

Posted by: Insomniac at March 13, 2019 12:23 PM (NMwvZ)

*********

Aww, how cute! Matching hashes.

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:33 PM

*******

True l'amour!

Posted by: Diogenes at March 13, 2019 12:53 PM (0tfLf)

561 Not trying to piss anyone off here, but who is paying to watch women's sports right now? Outside of tennis and ice skating, anyway.

Valid point but the end result will be that you'll have not only no spectators but no PARTICIPANTS that aren't swinging dick.

Women will be barefoot, pregnant, and in the kitchen.

Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 12:54 PM (8erNz)

562 If you're deemed not worthy to go to Finishing School (college), you shall be post-birth aborted upon High School graduation.

Posted by: Hikaru at March 13, 2019 12:54 PM (UnA8+)

563 559
So if you were being electrocuted would it be better not to resist?

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:53 PM (m45I2)

I had a buddy once tell me that if you keep one hand in your pocket while working on a live wire, you could not get electrocuted.

So far, so good!

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at March 13, 2019 12:54 PM (ymnmz)

564 Jonathan Walker Lindh.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at March 13, 2019 12:55 PM (/qEW2)

565 Psst!! Hey lady! Wanna buy some credentials?

/Guy on a Hollywood street corner in a trench coat.

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:55 PM (m45I2)

566 I learned it as "Bad Beer Rots Our Young Guts But Vodka Goes Well".

Posted by: Rusty Nail at March 13, 2019 12:55 PM (ju9gW)

567 Nood. Open thread.

Posted by: Brunnhilde at March 13, 2019 12:55 PM (aW5/6)

568 517 Fonda wasn't too bad in Cat Ballou.

-
Cat Ballou is a good movie. There. I said it.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:42 PM (+y/Ru)

It's no 'The Man Who Loved Cat Dancing'

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 12:55 PM (bcbK8)

569 558 Read a funny twitter thread likening these kids to "Dreamers" who were dragged into these schools illegally by their parents, and it's not really "fair" that they should have to leave --- they have dreams of being doctors and such!

Yes, to those Lefties upset by these kids: why is their illegal invasion of USC and Yale so much worse than Dreamers? And don;t say financial privilege, because the kids who got to college legitimately have "academic privilege," right?
Posted by: Lizzy at March 13, 2019 12:53 PM (W+vEI)

Because English is their native language and they can't be used to Tower of Babel us apart.

Posted by: Hikaru at March 13, 2019 12:55 PM (UnA8+)

570 The only Niven story with a car being driven that I recall was "Deadlier Weapon" or something like that. Guy gets carjacked, convinces car jacker he's willing to slide the car, passenger-side first, into a bridge abutment at 100mph...

Posted by: Rob Crawford at March 13, 2019 12:55 PM (bhiqh)

571 That sidebar piece on the basketball teams is illustrative. The LGBTQWERTY tribe is going to chase women out of sports. The upside of this is that no one is going to pay to watch trannies play each other, so the "women's" leagues will go bankrupt.
Posted by: JEM at March 13, 2019 12:49 PM (8erNz)

Well, they might score more points and make it exciting.

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at March 13, 2019 12:56 PM (3sjI6)

572 486
But we had to draw a line somewhere to protect our own shit, and that line was the Fulda Gap.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at March 13, 2019 12:28 PM (hkrxT)

REFORGER was before my time - but man, did the NCOs have stories about what a cluster that was going to be.
If
the supposedly declassified shit I've read is true - hoo boy. Nobody
was going to survive. Widespread tactical nukes - the USSR willing to
sacrifice an entire first wave of infantry to radiation sickness. That
entire continent was going to be wiped.
Posted by: The Artist Formerly Known as SD

I used to man one of those tactical nuke sites...that shiz was scary as hell while the cold war luke-warm.

Posted by: BifBewalski - sofa king we Todd did at March 13, 2019 12:56 PM (td8Ta)

573 my morning rant...if i give to your organization....and then you bombard me weekly with requests for more money....i'm never giving to you again.....stop trying to guilt me into giving by sending me gifts i don't want.

Posted by: phoenixgirl at March 13, 2019 12:56 PM (0O7c5)

574 A friend of mine says he loves to watch women's curling because he can yell, "Faster! Sweep faster!"

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:57 PM (+y/Ru)

575 When I watch curling I always expect someone to end up in the fetal position.

Posted by: Muldoon at March 13, 2019 12:59 PM (m45I2)

576 553
As long as you're posting commie traitor pictures, I hear that Ethel Rosenberg was quite the looker.

Posted by: pep at March 13, 2019 11:13 AM (TpAxy)

Her last engagement was as a conductor.

-

Smokin' hot!

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at March 13, 2019 12:51 PM (+y/Ru)

With a very grounded personality. Though she was quite amped up at her last public appearance.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at March 13, 2019 12:59 PM (jxbfJ)

577 A woman with unicorn armpit hair has no cause to complain when a guy wears a shirt covered with hula girls or Female Boob Inspector on it.

Posted by: Kate Winslet's boobs at March 13, 2019 12:59 PM (ODqVx)

578 And the accident killed both? Yes? Please?

I love happy endings...
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at March 13, 2019 11:22 AM (bcbK

No, just the hobo woman, who though clearly a loser, did not deserve to die that way. Car was barely damaged. The driver had a criminal record, and Uber should never had hired it. The road really wasn't a four-lane "highway", just an arterial road with traffic lights, and maybe a 40 mph speed limit, in downtown Tempe.

Hobo's family is suing Uber for a bundle of money, and I hope they win.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 01:00 PM (nPGq2)

579 Step 1: Get loud and aggressive with far left talking points. Attack anyone at any time. GET ATTENTION. Facts don't matter.

Step 2: Get far left dimwits to give lots and lots of money to you.

Step 3: Keep the money.

Posted by: Alexandria Occasio-Cortez ($$$ - NY) at March 13, 2019 01:01 PM (4Eo4+)

580 self driving cars ... make sure your Google social credit score doesn't put you in the NSA file as a target. The net giants can defund you and shadow ban, but there are other subtle ways to eff with you.

Maybe the headrest doesn't explode, but a chip in your fridge suddenly causes problems, or any number of connected devices "act up". Or GPS takes you down an ally where you get SethRiched. Or that headrest emits some sonic heart attack wave, so sad. Or your plane suddenly goes into a dive ...

Posted by: illiniwek at March 13, 2019 01:01 PM (Cus5s)

581 Jimmy Walker.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at March 13, 2019 01:03 PM (/qEW2)

582 And.. I think black people are taught never to cross a street at the light or the corner..

Anyone else ever noticed that?

I don't think it is racist.. just an observation..
Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 13, 2019 11:24 AM (so+oy)

And one other thing: people with dark skin, wearing dark-colored clothing, are simply harder to see at night, period. Because less light reflects off them, no more, no less.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 01:04 PM (nPGq2)

583
I participated in REFORGER 1972. It was every pit of the cluster fuck you could imagine.
Posted by: NOT THAT GUY at March 13, 2019 12:40 PM (09siJ)

The Germans got rich with Reforger. The damage compensations to German property was ludicrous.

Posted by: Sooner at March 13, 2019 01:04 PM (Fs5vw)

584 Anti-American dummies are often attractive. Look how thin Rachel Corrie was.

Posted by: Kate Winslet's boobs at March 13, 2019 01:05 PM (ODqVx)

585 542
I heard she'd joined the resistance.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at March 13, 2019 12:48 PM

She broke every law but Ohm's.

Posted by: Rusty Nail at March 13, 2019
*
*
. . .

By the famous definition of "genius," Ethel was one. She had an infinite capacitance for taking pains.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at March 13, 2019 01:06 PM (elsTe)

586 Could have added: ".. and it is the business of lazy-ass conservatives is make sure that Twitter stays relevant by constantly linking to it like digital rowers chained in the hold of high tech triremes.""

Posted by: Born Free at March 13, 2019 01:06 PM (BglpJ)

587 American Red Cross marketing handbook:
1. Harass everyone who has ever given blood. Daily phone calls, texts, emails. Even if they just made an appointment, don't let up. Even if they just gave blood and can't give for a while, don't let up.
2. When they show up for their donation, treat them like cattle. Let them know that the volunteers taking their blood are the real heroes. Make them wait, over and over again, at all stages of the process. Their time is not valuable. Keep asking them what their name is. Then when they're done, force them to wait 15 minutes while a 92 year old volunteer with dementia plys them with pretzels and fruit juice.

Posted by: Red Cross - Department of Motor Vehicles, LLC at March 13, 2019 01:12 PM (4Eo4+)

588 That's one of the selling points. "Oh, if we only have self-driving vehicles then people can drink and get stoned as much as they want!" Although it's not usually phrased that way.
Posted by: joncelli, because somebody had to at March 13, 2019 11:44 AM (RD7QR)

Well, unless the laws are changed, it wouldn't help, anyway. You could be charged with "having care and control of a motor vehicle while intoxicated".

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 01:25 PM (nPGq2)

589 I have no idea what all those Somalis in NYC are going to do for a living after autonomous cabs.
_____________

They'll have to learn to code.
Posted by: TrivialPursuer at March 13, 2019 11:50 AM (fqUgw)

Or simply work more hours in their side gig, crime.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 01:29 PM (nPGq2)

590 I suppose the comic is the Democrats male outreach. I can just see the PP commercial...

"Tired of child support payments? Ask your doctor about fortieth trimester abortions..."

Posted by: Karen at March 13, 2019 01:44 PM (+pMUw)

591 But everyone just stumbles through their parts, looking confused (I'm sure they were) and the story is an absolutely horrible story - at the end, everyone she came to help dies pointlessly, and she and the Head Evil character fly off together, smiling. The End.

(well it was made by The French, waddya expect)
Posted by: Tom Servo at March 13, 2019 12:06 PM (Kpl3J)

You don't watch Barbarella for the story. You watch it for Jane Fonda's tits.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 01:45 PM (nPGq2)

592 had a humorous amber alert the other day. message on cell phone said "AMBER ALERT! for more information go to http://..."

so apparently i'm supposed to be surfing the web while driving for the children.
Posted by: Anachronda at March 13, 2019 12:07 PM (sGtp+)

I hate those amber alerts. I have them turned off in my phone, yet somehow one got through a couple of weeks ago. I just don't notice children much. Not a parent. If I see a child in the company of an adult, my default assumption is that the adult is a parent or is otherwise legally acting as a guardian.

If I were ever to witness what appears to be the actual kidnapping of a child, sure I will call the cops.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 01:55 PM (nPGq2)

593 "It also reminds me of the old adage that the modern world has divided itself into conservatives and progressives. The business of progressives is to go on screwing things up. And it is the business of conservatives to make sure that the screw-ups never occur."

FIFY (GKC would have wanted it that way)

Posted by: DynamiteDan at March 13, 2019 02:03 PM (MqzWH)

594 And.. I think black people are taught never to cross a street at the light or the corner..

it does seem so
Posted by: BlackOrchid at March 13, 2019 11:25 AM (Rarvo)

In Michigan it's called Ghetto Lottery. We have a substantial fund that evidently lawyers have tapped into to reward all jaywalkers. It's why our insurance is higher than any other state! Winning!

Posted by: Chillin the most at March 13, 2019 02:09 PM (lonOK)

595 nope eagles eat fish tho.
Posted by: willow at March 13, 2019 12:32 PM (gLMhO)

And even when roasted, they still taste like seagull.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at March 13, 2019 02:09 PM (nPGq2)

596 HANOI JANE? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?

There's a very attractive picture of Guevera available, too. You might have seen it on flags and t-shirts?

That doesn't mean that we want to see it...

Don't put your () in crazy, or evil. At what point will men finally figure this out?

Posted by: RobM1981 at March 13, 2019 02:30 PM (d2D5e)

597 Self-driving cars may be likelier to hit black people than white people?
That's easy to correct, program them to hit some extra white people until the number is right.

Posted by: PG at March 13, 2019 04:31 PM (iqCkn)

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