Overnight Open Thread (1 Apr 2016)

Looks like winter isn't done yet as April snow to coat northeastern US this weekend. Man, I just got my pool water up to snuff i.e. no longer green. Now it's gonna be a tad chilly to take a dip.

Violent Cities

Revisiting the world's most violent cities. Hmmm, many are south of us and we aren't enforcing the border and democrats insist on taking away our 2nd Amendment rights. Eff that.

ISIS Bag Handlers

At least 50 ISIS supporters are working as baggage handlers, cleaners and catering staff at Brussels airport. I wonder how many are working as bag handlers here in the US? It's happened before, this one recently.

Greatest One-Liners Before The Kill

Thermite Launcher

Homemade thermite cannon. Just a tad dangerous. Needs more range though.

NFL Combine Question

A strange question to ask but perfect for an ONT. If you wanted to kill a guy, would you kill him with a gun or a knife? The answer the LSU safety gave was weird though. Knifing is for fun? Also, if you have to continuously stab someone you're trying to kill, you are doing it wrong.

Sword Names Or 80's Metal Band?

Cold In July

I caught this movie the other day and it was pretty good. The story is about a homeowner who kills an intruder in his house and then having to deal with the vengeful father of the intruder. It stars Sam Shepard, Michael C. Hall (from the Showtime series Dexter), and Don Johnson. I loved the soundtrack. Very 80's synth, almost John Carpenter like, and it even included a track from Dynatron (Cosmo Black).

April Fools' Day

Heh. 4 Far-out space hoaxes for April Fools' Day.

The morning of April 1, 1976, Moore announced on a BBC radio station that at 9:47 am, Pluto would pass behind Jupiter, creating the Jovian-Plutonian Gravitational Effect. These planets would pull at the Earth, temporarily decreasing its gravity. Moore instructed his audience that if they jumped into the air at exactly 9:47, they’d be able to feel it.

When the time came, Moore instructed his listeners to "Jump, now!" Afterwards, many listeners called in to report that they'd floated.

Oh Oh

This isn't good for Texas in the long run. Number of Californians moving to Texas hits highest level in nearly a decade. Look at what happened to Colorado and Nevada. Unless these newcomers change their voting patterns, they're going to be electing folks that will implement policies that they have been fleeing. Eventually, they won't have any place to flee to.

Car Headlights

Glad to know it wasn't my imagination when I noted on my new car that the headlights seemed to be dimmer. IIHS says lots of new car headlights in the U.S. are garbage.

Dog Video

Tonight's ONT brought to you by pictures that prove you have a dirty mind:

Top dog image via

Notice: Posted by permission of AceCorp LLC. Please e-mail overnight open thread tips to maet or CDR M. Otherwise send tips to Ace.

Posted by: CDR M at 10:24 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of page)

1 Top 10 and wishing I had something wise, witty or intelligent to say.

Don't though.

Posted by: Northernlurker at April 01, 2016 10:24 PM (4rzL1)

2 Aloha!

Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 10:24 PM (EzgxV)

3 Sword Names Or 80's Metal Band

heh

Dog Video

double heh

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 01, 2016 10:25 PM (A/3fN)

4 fav april fools gag: bbc documentary on spaghetti harvest. actually believed by some english viewers. can be found on youtube. lotta fun.

Posted by: musical jolly chimp at April 01, 2016 10:26 PM (WTSFk)

5 Baltimore and St Louis - did Barky take much interest in either?

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 01, 2016 10:27 PM (T78UI)

6 Sword Names Or 80's Metal Band?

Oh, wait a sec. Now HBO is asking for help in supporting the invasion by jihadis?

Ugg.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 01, 2016 10:27 PM (A/3fN)

7 How things change.

Sarah Palin was a rockstar here in Wisconsin only a few years ago during the ACT 10 battles. Tonight as DT's representative at the Milwaukee/Waukesha GOP DINNER She got a very cool reception and tepid applause to say the least.

Guess we hit 15 minutes 1 second finally...

Posted by: H Badger at April 01, 2016 10:27 PM (dPROI)

8 Great - all those murderers are slipping into the US, across our open border.

Posted by: Lizzy at April 01, 2016 10:28 PM (NOIQH)

9 Don't Californicate Texas!

Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at April 01, 2016 10:29 PM (1ijHg)

10 Nice ONT

Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:30 PM (nbrY/)

11 Thanks, Ace.

Donny, heres a couple pamphelets you might wanna review then get back to us.

Posted by: DM at April 01, 2016 10:31 PM (5iLYn)

12 BREAKING NEWS!

Hillary and Bill Clinton have been indicted for fraud. The Clinton Global Initiative is NOT a Charity.


Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at April 01, 2016 10:31 PM (1ijHg)

13 I just want to say that Synder's new Cinnamon Sugar Pretzel Poppers are friggin' awesome.

Posted by: CDR M at April 01, 2016 10:31 PM (McoS+)

14 9 Don't Californicate Texas!
Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at April 01, 2016 10:29 PM (1ijHg)

Everything needs to be Californicated.

btw, did you know we live in California? Just in case that wasn't clear.

Posted by: Red Hot Chili Peppers at April 01, 2016 10:32 PM (s87AC)

15 Cause the original salty, dried-out, pretzels were shit.


Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at April 01, 2016 10:33 PM (1ijHg)

16 Fornicate all you want. Abort all you want. The Caliphate awaits to behead you.


Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at April 01, 2016 10:35 PM (1ijHg)

17 Thermite Launcher

Homemade thermite cannon. Just a tad dangerous. Needs more range though.

...

NFL Combine Question

A strange question to ask but perfect for an ONT. If you wanted to kill a guy, would you kill him with a gun or a knife? The answer the LSU safety gave was weird though. Knifing is for fun? Also, if you have to continuously stab someone you're trying to kill, you are doing it wrong.


The choice is obvious...

Posted by: The Thermite Hat at April 01, 2016 10:35 PM (vBeA5)

18 Dang locusts headed for Texas.

Posted by: Emmie at April 01, 2016 10:36 PM (rRHdN)

19 Thermite cannon!

Thermite cannon!

Thermite cannon!

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 10:36 PM (lutOX)

20 Friday Night ONT Compliance Pics

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715929626036543488

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715929759876820992

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715929905637134337

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715930095832207364

Posted by: kbdabear at April 01, 2016 10:36 PM (RdWVy)

21 In Forged In Fire both of the finalists' claymores (not Highland broadswords) sucked. Sucked real bad.

Posted by: andycanuck at April 01, 2016 10:36 PM (ioqGj)

22 12 BREAKING NEWS!

Hillary and Bill Clinton have been indicted for fraud. The Clinton Global Initiative is NOT a Charity.


Posted by: Grampa Jumbo at April 01, 2016 10:31 PM (1ijHg)

---

*looks at clock*

Yep. Still April 1st.

Posted by: SMFH while circling the drain... at April 01, 2016 10:36 PM (rlfds)

23 Good evening.
Should I purchase a Samsung Galaxy 7Edge?

Posted by: mpfs at April 01, 2016 10:37 PM (z7QI2)

24 Case law. The six marked pages only.

Bill of rights. First ten only.

Mayflower pact. Broke original agreement.

Magna Carta. Skip around.

Posted by: DM at April 01, 2016 10:38 PM (5iLYn)

25 More Friday Night ONT Compliance Pics

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715930387558572033

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715930717318942720

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715979184577843200

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715979378379857920

Posted by: kbdabear at April 01, 2016 10:38 PM (RdWVy)

26 I'd like to have sex with 68% of the game of thrones cast.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 10:39 PM (pUDQf)

27 Even More Friday Night ONT Compliance Pics

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715979557002743808

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715979725462708224

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715979877380448257

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/715980014278221824

Posted by: kbdabear at April 01, 2016 10:40 PM (RdWVy)

28 4 Far-out space hoaxes for April Fools' Day.

Rand Simberg had a good one today.

http://www.transterrestrial.com/?p=64018

Posted by: rickl at April 01, 2016 10:40 PM (sdi6R)

29 kbdabear,

Now who is being exploited? Those pretty girls or the horny men, such as myself?


Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at April 01, 2016 10:41 PM (1ijHg)

30 Thermite cannon!


Puts me in mind of my favorite WWI incendiary - yes, I have one - daisite.

Thermite bound with sulfur. The stuff burned explosively, blasting white-hot metal all over the place.

Good times, good times.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 10:42 PM (lutOX)

31 Anyone else watching the Bret Baier special?

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 10:42 PM (yddCj)

32 >

It's never to cold to dip Copenhagen!

Posted by: Walt Garrison at April 01, 2016 10:43 PM (1JnAL)

33 Friggin' Californians. They've been moving up to Seattle for years turning it into a third world crap-hole.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 01, 2016 10:43 PM (08Znv)

34
I'd like to have sex with 68% of the game of thrones cast.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 10:39 PM (pUDQf)

Even the women?

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 01, 2016 10:43 PM (T78UI)

35 Good ONT

Posted by: Randolph Bismuth at April 01, 2016 10:44 PM (ZEyrs)

36 Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 10:42 PM (yddCj)

It's Friday night. What the hell is wrong with you, compadre?

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 10:44 PM (pUDQf)

37 17 Thermite Launcher

Homemade thermite cannon. Just a tad dangerous. Needs more range though.

...

NFL Combine Question

A strange question to ask but perfect for an ONT. If you wanted to kill a guy, would you kill him with a gun or a knife? The answer the LSU safety gave was weird though. Knifing is for fun? Also, if you have to continuously stab someone you're trying to kill, you are doing it wrong.

The choice is obvious...

Posted by: The Thermite Hat at April 01, 2016 10:35 PM (vBeA5)



Why the limitation?

Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 10:45 PM (EzgxV)

38 Those Californians are moving to Austin, TX.
They won't change voting demographics.

Keep Austin Weird, that's the city motto.

Posted by: Ralph at April 01, 2016 10:45 PM (AHcCm)

39 Hey cooth.

Posted by: SMFH while circling the drain... at April 01, 2016 10:45 PM (rlfds)

40 "Now it's gonna be a tad chilly to take a dip."

"It's never to cold to dip Copenhagen!
Posted by: Walt Garrison at April 01, 2016 10:43 PM"


Skoal, brother.

Posted by: Earl Campbell at April 01, 2016 10:45 PM (1JnAL)

41 HAPPY MOTHERFUCKING FRI....

*checks calendar*


YES, MULTIPLE SOURCES HAVE CONFIRMED IT IS IN FACT FRIDAY

Posted by: DC in River City at April 01, 2016 10:45 PM (e+1S5)

42 Once you've had green
you'll never want the queen!

Posted by: a dragon at April 01, 2016 10:46 PM (ioqGj)

43 38 Those Californians are moving to Austin, TX.
They won't change voting demographics.

Keep Austin Weird, that's the city motto.


Posted by: Ralph at April 01, 2016 10:45 PM (AHcCm)


Used to call Boulder "Eastern California"...

Posted by: Don Q at April 01, 2016 10:46 PM (qf6WZ)

44 Good Lord! I THOUGHT the headlights on the Camry I bought last summer weren't very good compared to my old car, but thought surely that was in my imagination.

Turns out the score not good, not acceptable, but marginal. At least that's one step above poor.

Good grief! Is there anything one can replace to fix this? It's especially not good with older eyes.

Posted by: Alana at April 01, 2016 10:46 PM (DI+ph)

45 Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 01, 2016 10:43 PM (T78UI)

I am a lesbian, so yeah.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 10:47 PM (pUDQf)

46 Posted by: The Thermite Hat at April 01, 2016 10:35 PM (vBeA5)

Thermite Hat?

Well... that's one way to keep your ears warm I guess....

Posted by: Don Q at April 01, 2016 10:48 PM (qf6WZ)

47 Friggin' Californians. They've been moving up to Seattle for years turning it into a third world crap-hole.
Posted by: Diogenes


There are very few native Californians. Most are transplants from the East coast. So if you have a hard-on for assigning blame to the purple-ization of the West, look East, young man.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 01, 2016 10:48 PM (A/3fN)

48 Holy crap, Brazil!

I didn't even know you had 32 cities!

Posted by: average biped at April 01, 2016 10:48 PM (6tGoF)

49 Knife vs gun
The classic answer that knife is for personal motives, for rage, or pleasure etc.
Gun is for business.
Obviously there are exceptions. Shooting a guy in the nuts = personal.
Slitting throat from behind, business.
Not that I've given this a lot of thought or anything.

Then there are those who can kill with a typo.

Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:49 PM (nbrY/)

50 Friggin' Californians. They've been moving up to Seattle for years turning it into a third world crap-hole.
Posted by: Diogenes

There are very few native Californians. Most are transplants from the East coast. So if you have a hard-on for assigning blame to the purple-ization of the West, look East, young man.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 01, 2016 10:48 PM (A/3fN)



If the left tends to not reproduce as much then where in the hell do they keep coming from to take over state after state? Is it invasion of the body snatchers?

Posted by: TheQuietMan at April 01, 2016 10:50 PM (45oDG)

51 Thermite-schmermite.
Nothing beats a couple foogas traps on your parimeter.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 01, 2016 10:50 PM (08Znv)

52 Woot woot ONT baby

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin at April 01, 2016 10:51 PM (voOPb)

53 Nice ONT. Thanks, Cdr M.

Posted by: ALH at April 01, 2016 10:51 PM (Z56vq)

54 That line from X-Men about toads is not one of the greatest anythings. It's one of the dumbest all-time lines.

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at April 01, 2016 10:51 PM (AroJD)

55 51 Thermite-schmermite.
Nothing beats a couple foogas traps on your parimeter.
Posted by: Diogenes at April 01, 2016 10:50 PM (08Znv)
***
Flame, shrapnel, or both?

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 10:51 PM (lutOX)

56 TheQuietMan, the people who breed put their spawn through indoctrination centers.

Posted by: Emmie at April 01, 2016 10:52 PM (rRHdN)

57 It's Friday night. What the hell is wrong with you, compadre?
Posted by: AlaBAMA
-------------

Well-documented special regarding Obama foreign policy and American military preparedness. Powerful, powerful stuff. I'm hoping DVD's will be available.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 10:52 PM (yddCj)

58
49 Knife vs gun
The classic answer that knife is for personal motives, for rage, or pleasure etc.
Gun is for business.
Obviously there are exceptions. Shooting a guy in the nuts = personal.
Slitting throat from behind, business.
Not that I've given this a lot of thought or anything.

Then there are those who can kill with a typo.
Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:49 PM (nbrY/)

Pretty much spot on. Knives are close contact weapons. Whether by choice or not.

Biggest issue with knives is people not knowing what's a kill shot vs what will leave someone pissed off. Arteries, people!

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 10:53 PM (pUDQf)

59 Btw can ceramic knives get thru airport x-rays?

Just curious.

Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:53 PM (nbrY/)

60 Then there are those who can kill with a typo.



Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:49 PM (nbrY/)

*Frantically searches for the typo in her comment***As a grammar Nazi and holder of an English degree dutifully finds some*****Body hits the floor***

Posted by: average biped at April 01, 2016 10:53 PM (6tGoF)

61 Can i get a gun that shoots knives?


asking for a friend...

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 10:54 PM (o7Ufw)

62 Hooooooorde!

We're drinking, right? Right. Excellent.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 10:54 PM (GEICT)

63 49 Knife vs gun
The classic answer that knife is for personal motives, for rage, or pleasure etc.
Gun is for business.
Obviously there are exceptions. Shooting a guy in the nuts = personal.
Slitting throat from behind, business.
Not that I've given this a lot of thought or anything.

Then there are those who can kill with a typo.
Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:49 PM (nbrY/)
***
I recall vividly the time I had to talk my mother out of a killing.

She'd made up her mind, and formulated a very practical, workable plan. She was going to set the back of their house on fire, and shoot them as they came out the front. They'd be backlit, confused, and panicked, making them easy targets.

Rage is a hell of a drug.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 10:55 PM (lutOX)

64
60 Btw can ceramic knives get thru airport x-rays?

Just curious.
Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:53 PM (nbrY/)

Nope. Don't even try.

X-rays are density. Not metal vs ceramic.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 10:55 PM (pUDQf)

65 Famous one liners before the kill

"So what is your position on abortion Mr. Trump"? ' C. Mathews

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 10:55 PM (o7Ufw)

66 If the left tends to not reproduce as much then where in the hell do they keep coming from to take over state after state? Is it invasion of the body snatchers?
Posted by: TheQuietMan


They reproduced just fine 50 years ago.

... You know, I'd almost put money on a guess that the reduction in birth-rate is actually equivalent between the left and right in the US.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 01, 2016 10:55 PM (A/3fN)

67 62
Can i get a gun that shoots knives?





asking for a friend...

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 10:54 PM (o7Ufw)

You're looking for Final Fantasy VIII. Gunblades.

Posted by: average biped at April 01, 2016 10:55 PM (6tGoF)

68 Of course there are few native Californians, anchor babies excluded of course. Fully a third of my neighborhood is from Cali. Who cares if these jack holes started from Maryland, Conn or Mass?

Posted by: Diogenes at April 01, 2016 10:55 PM (08Znv)

69 Holy carp. If mine eyes do not deceive me, 32 of the world's 50 most homicidal cities are in Brazil.
Yikes.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 01, 2016 10:55 PM (T/5A0)

70 Can i get a gun that shoots knives?
------------

Okay, ambiguous antecedent.

Posted by: The Ambiguous Antecedent Police at April 01, 2016 10:56 PM (yddCj)

71 Biggest issue with knives is people not knowing what's a kill shot vs what will leave someone pissed off. Arteries, people!

--

Classics are always best.
Although, from behind, if you can get it right into the kidney,that would be fatal and excruciating, yes?

Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:56 PM (nbrY/)

72 Slitting throat from behind, business.

---

says you

Posted by: Orenthal J.S. at April 01, 2016 10:56 PM (o7Ufw)

73 Once you've felt scale,
You'll never want pale!

Posted by: a dragon at April 01, 2016 10:56 PM (ioqGj)

74 I wonder if an ice dagger would make it through security. The density of ice isn't that dense.


Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at April 01, 2016 10:57 PM (1ijHg)

75 60
Btw can ceramic knives get thru airport x-rays?



Just curious.

Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:53 PM (nbrY/)
what about those plastic knives not the picnic ones....the kitchen ones...

Posted by: phoenixgirl at April 01, 2016 10:58 PM (0O7c5)

76 No Mister Bond, I expect you to die.

Posted by: whatmeworry? at April 01, 2016 10:58 PM (dZGNV)

77
Classics are always best.
Although, from behind, if you can get it right into the kidney,that would be fatal and excruciating, yes?
Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:56 PM (


If you have someone from behind, the base of the skull is a better bet for instant flop.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 10:58 PM (pUDQf)

78 Classics are always best.
Although, from behind, if you can get it right into the kidney,that would be fatal and excruciating, yes?
Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:56 PM (nbrY/)
***
Downward, through the clavicle.

Up, toward the kidney or the liver.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 10:58 PM (lutOX)

79 Btw can ceramic knives get thru airport x-rays?

Just curious.
Posted by: @votermom


Well, if it looks like a knife under any kind of scan, they probably won't be enthused about letting it pass.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 01, 2016 10:58 PM (A/3fN)

80 Of course there are few native Californians, anchor babies excluded of course. Fully a third of my neighborhood is from Cali. Who cares if these jack holes started from Maryland, Conn or Mass?
Posted by: Diogenes
---------------

We have a tacit understanding in our neighborhood, no political signs.

Couple moved in fron CA. First election after they got here, their lawn sprouted half a dozen signs, all for Leftys. They've been doing it ever since.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 10:59 PM (yddCj)

81 If you have someone from behind, the base of the skull is a better bet for instant flop.
Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 10:58 PM (pUDQf)
***
yep. Keep it simple.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 10:59 PM (lutOX)

82 My hometown (Pacific Beach) was overrun by baby-boom assholes from Chicago and New York. By the time I graduated college, forget it. too expensive.




Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at April 01, 2016 10:59 PM (1ijHg)

83 "The storms could rise to G2 level on a five-step scale, which would mean the Northern Lights might be seen in New York and some electrical transformers could be damaged."

---

Those of you that rely on GPS, better buy a map this weekend.

http://tinyurl.com/h47xcwl

Posted by: SMFH while circling the drain... at April 01, 2016 10:59 PM (rlfds)

84 So, George Carlin was the only guy who had the balls to speak the truth. Sh-t ,pis-, fuc- , cun-, cocksuc- r, mfer, and tit-*. The 7 words you can't say. Or can you? I miss that. Or did I?.

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at April 01, 2016 10:59 PM (EDJH7)

85 >>>We're drinking, right?

Nah, homie. I quit. That demon rum is bad for your health.

Posted by: DC in River City at April 01, 2016 11:00 PM (e+1S5)

86 Famous one liners before the kill

"I do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States." - H Rodham

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:00 PM (o7Ufw)

87 Fully a third of my neighborhood is from Cali. Who cares if these jack holes started from Maryland, Conn or Mass?
Posted by: Diogenes


Why blame California when ML, CN, and/or MS is the origin of your woes?

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 01, 2016 11:00 PM (A/3fN)

88 Nah, homie. I quit. That demon rum is bad for your health.

Posted by: DC in River City at April 01, 2016 11:00 PM (e+1S5)



I don't care what day it is, no one is buying that.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:01 PM (GEICT)

89 METAL URETHRA

---

Game of thrones sword?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:01 PM (o7Ufw)

90 "That demon rum is bad for your health."

---

News to me.

Posted by: SMFH while circling the drain... at April 01, 2016 11:01 PM (rlfds)

91 45
I am a lesbian, so yeah.
Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 10:47 PM (pUDQf)


A "lesbian-lesbian" or a "lesbian in a man's body"? Inquiring minds want to know.

Posted by: rickl at April 01, 2016 11:01 PM (sdi6R)

92 Famous one liners before the kill:

Just the tip, just for a second, to see how it feels

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:02 PM (GEICT)

93 80s Bands or GoT Sword:
Stanis Baratheon's old sailor gives great advice IRL too.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 01, 2016 11:02 PM (VdICR)

94 Famous one liners before the kill:

---

"I do" - A Hitler

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:03 PM (o7Ufw)

95 Famous one liners before the kill:

You don't need that. I'm on the pill.

- Your Mom


Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:05 PM (GEICT)

96 82 Of course there are few native Californians, anchor babies excluded of course. Fully a third of my neighborhood is from Cali. Who cares if these jack holes started from Maryland, Conn or Mass?
Posted by: Diogenes
---------------

We have a tacit understanding in our neighborhood, no political signs.

Couple moved in fron CA. First election after they got here, their lawn sprouted half a dozen signs, all for Leftys. They've been doing it ever since.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 10:59 PM (yddCj)

Toby the Cat has a diabolical job to do, remove signs in the dead of night

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin at April 01, 2016 11:05 PM (voOPb)

97 93 45
I am a lesbian, so yeah.
Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 10:47 PM (pUDQf)

A "lesbian-lesbian" or a "lesbian in a man's body"? Inquiring minds want to know.
Posted by: rickl at April 01, 2016 11:01 PM (sdi6R)

There are two PT Barnum quotes that come to mind in regards to your inquiry. I'll let you quests which.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 11:05 PM (pUDQf)

98 yes we're drinking

Posted by: ghost of hallelujah at April 01, 2016 11:06 PM (dBmVV)

99 Aloha!
Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 10:24 PM

Hey Cooth. Now that the finance is more amenable to moving out of CA, plans are going better?

Posted by: Farmer at April 01, 2016 11:06 PM (o/90i)

100 >>>Although, from behind, if you can get it right into the kidney,that would be fatal and excruciating, yes?

Sure, it's fatal. Eventually.

But getting stabbed is painful, and most people react to pain by flopping about and making noise. And some people will recognize that a stab wound means there is an aggressor nearby, and will attempt to react with superior violence in response to the threat.

So, base of the skull, above the ear, or up through the soft palette are your best targets if working from behind with a blade. But it's probably better not to get within bad breath distance if it can be helped.

Posted by: DC in River City at April 01, 2016 11:06 PM (e+1S5)

101
Well-documented special regarding Obama foreign policy and American military preparedness. Powerful, powerful stuff. I'm hoping DVD's will be available.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 10:52 PM
This will repeated two times tomorrow, I think 6&8pm EST, but don't quote me on that, check your local listing, and it should be repeated more than that actually. Very good. Evening all.

Posted by: Bebe Dahl at April 01, 2016 11:06 PM (yNyJy)

102 I recall vividly the time I had to talk my mother out of a killing.

She'd made up her mind, and formulated a very practical, workable plan. She was going to set the back of their house on fire, and shoot them as they came out the front. They'd be backlit, confused, and panicked, making them easy targets.

Rage is a hell of a drug.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants

What?

Posted by: mpfs at April 01, 2016 11:07 PM (z7QI2)

103 97 Famous one liners before the kill:

You don't need that. I'm on the pill.

- Your Mom


Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:05 PM (GEICT)


Fatality!

LOL.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 11:07 PM (pUDQf)

104 Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 11:05 PM (pUDQf)

I apologize for rickl's....obtuseness.

The only appropriate comment is:

"Pictures or it didn't happen."

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 01, 2016 11:08 PM (Zu3d9)

105 Can i get a gun that shoots knives?

How about a knife that shoots bullets?

http://tinyurl.com/h5uqzsy

Posted by: Josephistan at April 01, 2016 11:08 PM (7qAYi)

106 Famous one liner

Indians? What fucking indians
General George A. Custer

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin at April 01, 2016 11:08 PM (voOPb)

107 "This isn't good for Texas..."

It's happening in Tennessee also.

Posted by: Great Reagan's Ghost at April 01, 2016 11:08 PM (kfoLf)

108 Toby the Cat has a diabolical job to do, remove signs in the dead of night
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin
-------------

IF he was unleashed on the neighborhood, terrible would be the slaughter. The horror, the horror...

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 11:08 PM (yddCj)

109 Famous one liners before the kill:

"If Virginia beats Syracuse, i will have picked the final four and be a finalist to win $500 in my NCAA pool" - me

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:08 PM (o7Ufw)

110 >>>97 Famous one liners before the kill:

You don't need that. I'm on the pill.

- Your Mom


Actual fucking lol

Posted by: DC in River City at April 01, 2016 11:08 PM (e+1S5)

111 I know an EMT who says people survive an amazing number of stab wounds, a dozen or more.
Placement matters, I guess.

Posted by: navybrat at April 01, 2016 11:09 PM (8QGte)

112 Baltimore and St Louis - did Barky take much interest in either?
Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 01, 2016 10:27 PM (T78UI)


For what it's worth, St. Louis city and Baltimore are fairly unique, in that they are independent cities (not part of a county), and very densely populated because of their small geographic size.


So in a sense, they have bad reputations because they are nowhere near as widely spread out as other large cities in the U.S. So their crimes stats are not as "diluted" as places like LA, Houston, Detroit, etc.

Posted by: BurtTC at April 01, 2016 11:10 PM (Dj0WE)

113 Synder's new Cinnamon Sugar Pretzel Poppers are friggin' awesome.
------
Better than the mustard & onion ones CDR M?

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin at April 01, 2016 11:10 PM (voOPb)

114 Evening.....

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 01, 2016 11:10 PM (9ym/8)

115 What?
Posted by: mpfs at April 01, 2016 11:07 PM (z7QI2)
***
Yep. She almost went feral.

Not saying the intended didn't have it coming, but her plan was unsatisfactory, as it would have endangered neighbors and exposed her to almost certain legal complications.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:10 PM (lutOX)

116 Famous one liners before the kill:

"If anything goes wrong, we'll just blame it on something on youtube" - H R C

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:10 PM (o7Ufw)

117 Knife vs gun
The classic answer that knife is for personal motives, for rage, or pleasure etc.
Gun is for business.
Obviously there are exceptions. Shooting a guy in the nuts = personal.
Slitting throat from behind, business.
Not that I've given this a lot of thought or anything.

Then there are those who can kill with a typo.


Posted by: @votermom
****

A knife within it's range is deadlier than a handgun.
Very few people (if any) have been decapitated or disemboweled by a handgun. The "ammo capacity" of a knife is greater. I'd rather be shot than stabbed, provided I have such a choice.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 01, 2016 11:11 PM (hVdx9)

118 The knife reportedly found at the former home of O.J. Simpson is not connected to the 1994 slayings of his ex-wife Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman, Los Angeles police confirmed Friday.

The Los Angeles Police Department performed a variety of forensic tests on the rusty 5-inch fixed blade knife and compared it with the wounds inflicted on the victims before ruling it out as the murder weapon, two sources familiar with the investigation said.

Posted by: James T Kirk at April 01, 2016 11:12 PM (e8kgV)

119 Famous one liners before the kill:

"That Jeb guy, he's so low energy"

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:12 PM (o7Ufw)

120 So you think you got a cringe inducing president now. (You do of course) but check out this desperate little man behind his big desk telling you his failure is your fault. http://tinyurl.com/hrpontc

Posted by: simplemind at April 01, 2016 11:12 PM (BTnAK)

121 70 Holy carp. If mine eyes do not deceive me, 32 of the world's 50 most homicidal cities are in Brazil.
Yikes.
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 01, 2016 10:55 PM (T/5A0)

In Brazil, they're nuts about the polka (and murder).

And let's not forget that Brazil is in the midst of a bad economic contraction and corruption at the very top; they're currently contemplating impeaching the Brazilian President.

Top this off with the planning for the Olympics for the summer of this year and the Zika scare, Brazil's pretty much in the lurch right now.

Posted by: Thrawn at April 01, 2016 11:12 PM (s87AC)

122 Trump just named Rosie O'Donnell as his VP pick.

Posted by: Bebe Dahl at April 01, 2016 11:12 PM (yNyJy)

123 "There are very few native Californians. Most are transplants from the East coast."

Nancy Pelosi is originally from Bowel-timore.

Posted by: torquewrench at April 01, 2016 11:12 PM (noWW6)

124 117

Holy shit.
Wow.
I'd never want to piss her off.

Posted by: mpfs at April 01, 2016 11:12 PM (z7QI2)

125 Watching a documentary on the very first execution done by electric chair, William Kemmler, the poor soul/Guinea pig said, "Take it easy, do it properly. I'm in no hurry."

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 11:12 PM (pUDQf)

126 The scene from Fury, with the WP round to the building...

And the blockhouse scene duringx the landing in Saving Private Ryan....

Both show being ignited by whichever modern weapon is a decidedly excellent way to eliminate the enemy.

Keep em in the inventory and hope to never be on the receiving end.

Evening Horde, I trust the proper libations are being consumed.

Posted by: Hillbillyking at April 01, 2016 11:13 PM (wkqRz)

127 121 Famous one liners before the kill:

"That Jeb guy, he's so low energy"
Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:12 PM (o7Ufw)


Poor Jeb didn't even know he needed Bactine.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 11:13 PM (pUDQf)

128 My husband is a 3rd generation native Californian. We now live in PA.

Posted by: mpfs at April 01, 2016 11:14 PM (z7QI2)

129 126 117

Holy shit.
Wow.
I'd never want to piss her off.
Posted by: mpfs at April 01, 2016 11:12 PM (z7QI2)
***
Jew-billy matriarchs are not to be crossed. But she's mellowed a bit, with age.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:15 PM (lutOX)

130 We're drinking, right? Right. Excellent.
Posted by: BCochran1981 -
Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 10:54 PM

I'm thinking there's a shot of tequila around here.

Posted by: Farmer at April 01, 2016 11:15 PM (o/90i)

131 I'm thinking there's a shot of tequila around here.

Posted by: Farmer at April 01, 2016 11:15 PM (o/90i)



Now it's a party.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:16 PM (GEICT)

132 Famous one liners before the kill:

"Maybe this Ted McGinley guy is just the shot in the arm this show needs."

Posted by: Josephistan at April 01, 2016 11:16 PM (7qAYi)

133 Posted by: James T Kirk at April 01, 2016 11:12 PM (e8kgV)
Even if the knife could be the same knife, it was tossed around at parties for years as possibly THE knife. Could anything be gleamed from it as far as forensics? Not being snide, I really want to know, can they lift any info after that much handling?

Posted by: Bebe Dahl at April 01, 2016 11:16 PM (yNyJy)

134 A knife within it's range is deadlier than a handgun.
Very few people (if any) have been decapitated or disemboweled by a handgun. The "ammo capacity" of a knife is greater. I'd rather be shot than stabbed, provided I have such a choice.


Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 01, 2016 11:11 PM (hVdx9)


I've been doing Historical Fencing for 25 years...

I'd MUCH rather face someone with a knife, than a gun...

Posted by: Don Q at April 01, 2016 11:17 PM (qf6WZ)

135 I know an EMT who says people survive an amazing number of stab wounds, a dozen or more.
Placement matters, I guess.
Posted by: navybrat
-------------------

Proximity of EMT's plays a role also.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 11:17 PM (yddCj)

136 Farmer, have a shot for me!

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin at April 01, 2016 11:17 PM (voOPb)

137 OK, chilling some wine. i blame you all

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:19 PM (o7Ufw)

138 Six beers/four hours =

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 11:21 PM (pUDQf)

139 Glad to know it wasn't my imagination when I noted on my new car that the headlights seemed to be dimmer.

Too bad the institute didn't test turn signals. I'm noticing that more than a few of the new model vehicles have nearly invisible rear signals, and that *is* when they're on.

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent at April 01, 2016 11:21 PM (LUlyE)

140 Farmer, have a shot for me!
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin at April 01, 2016 11:17 PM

Will do MH. We are headed up to Milwaukee for a Meat Loaf concert Sun. Jules is a big fan and this should be fun.

Posted by: Farmer at April 01, 2016 11:22 PM (o/90i)

141 Howdy, howdy!!!! Sorry for the delay -- was cooking dinner.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 11:22 PM (EzgxV)

142 Famous one liners before the kill:



"If anything goes wrong, we'll just blame it on something on youtube" - H R C

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:10 PM (o7Ufw)

"I did not leave four to die. I left forty to die. That takes real leadership." - H R C

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 01, 2016 11:22 PM (T78UI)

143 123: Top this off with the planning for the Olympics for the summer of this year and the Zika scare, Brazil's pretty much in the lurch right now.


So Bob Costas has contracting Zika and getting raped by a tranny and then robbed to look forward too. That will be more entertaining than the Olympics.

A good movie about Brazil is City of God. It makes The Wire seem upbeat by comparison

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0317248/

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 01, 2016 11:23 PM (syGA0)

144 The latest statistics this week from Pennsylvania's elections bureau show about 245,000 registered voters have switched this year, or 3 percent of the state's 8.2 million registered voters.

Posted by: James T Kirk at April 01, 2016 11:23 PM (e8kgV)

145 So I've started watching the Daredevil series on Netflix. Not bad. Not bad. Soooooooo much better than that abomination Ben Affleck coughed up.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 11:23 PM (pUDQf)

146 Famous one liners before the kill:

"the plot will revolve around a trade federation plot. The kids will LOVE it" G Lucas

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:23 PM (o7Ufw)

147 Not to sound like Otto from "Strangers on a Train," but let's horde-source a 'perfect' murder.

Touch of Evil - strangulation with a thin cord is held out as nearly ideal, and there are many advocates of the garrotte, 'tis true.

Poison is almost always detected. Gunshots are messy, and tend to be loud.

What say you, my morbid colleagues?

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:24 PM (lutOX)

148 Best April Fools joke ever - Shrillary screaming mental about the fossil fuel question from Greenapeace activist, with Shrill calling Sanders campaign liars. Classic!

Posted by: Bebe Dahl at April 01, 2016 11:24 PM (yNyJy)

149 Uncle Palpatine. Excellent link about the cosmonauts.

Remarkable on numerous levels.

Thanks for linking that.

Posted by: Hillbillyking at April 01, 2016 11:24 PM (wkqRz)

150 I'd rather be shot than stabbed.

I'm currently drinking Maker's.

I got accepted to Cal Lutherans grad school for quantitative economics.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 01, 2016 11:25 PM (mbSny)

151 Soooooooo much better than that abomination Ben Affleck coughed up.
Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 11:23 PM (pUDQf)


*mute*

*fast forward to scenes with Garner in the Elektra costume*

Ahhhh...that's better.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:25 PM (GEICT)

152 Famous one liners before the kill:

'Did you watch Regis this morning?' - Sterling Archer

Posted by: garrett at April 01, 2016 11:25 PM (F3ax6)

153 Not to sound like Otto from "Strangers on a Train," but let's horde-source a 'perfect' murder.

Touch of Evil - strangulation with a thin cord is held out as nearly ideal, and there are many advocates of the garrotte, 'tis true.

Poison is almost always detected. Gunshots are messy, and tend to be loud.

What say you, my morbid colleagues?

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine
****

Garrotte is a bad idea. Too much opportunity for "transfer". Plus you have to be very close. Expect a victim to fight vigorously.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 01, 2016 11:26 PM (hVdx9)

154 Looks as if Obama is trolling Trump.

Orange Julius doesn't do well when there's no #winning and no polls to talk about, and Obama is taking advantage of the lull between primaries.

Like, hey Donald, you don't know much about nuclear strategy, and as far as that goes, you don't know much about the world, either.

You know what this does, right? Trump will respond with blunt force speech, and his supporters will love it.

Obama wants to ensure that Orange Julius gets the nomination and goes up against Cankles. He wants to savor that huge win she'll get.

He wants to bury the GOP. Forever.

Posted by: the littl shyning man at April 01, 2016 11:26 PM (U6f54)

155 What say you, my morbid colleagues?

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:24 PM (lutOX)



Depends on the situation and prospective victim. You'd use an entirely different method for someone who was sick and in the hospital vs someone who is a well known celebrity.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:26 PM (GEICT)

156 151 Uncle Palpatine. Excellent link about the cosmonauts.

Remarkable on numerous levels.

Thanks for linking that.
Posted by: Hillbillyking at April 01, 2016 11:24 PM (wkqRz)
***
Poor, brave bastards.

There's a charming tradition of cosmonauts pissing on one of the tires of the bus that takes them to the launch-pad, because Yuri Gagarin did that before his first flight. Supposedly, even the lady cosmonauts will carry a small bottle of their own urine to pour on the tire.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:27 PM (lutOX)

157 >>I'd rather be shot than stabbed.


I worked doing roofing with a guy who was shot and stabbed (twice) while he worked on our crew.

He always claimed he would rather be shot twice than stabbed, once.

Posted by: garrett at April 01, 2016 11:27 PM (F3ax6)

158 Sadly this is not an April Fools joke.

You all know there are suicide prevention hotlines? A bill in California would establish a tax-payer funded suicide hotline to help you kill yourself:

http://preview.tinyurl.com/howp9a8

Posted by: The Fools Golden Hat at April 01, 2016 11:27 PM (vBeA5)

159 Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:25 PM (GEICT)

The credits to the Elecktra movie were a better watch than Affleck's Daredevil.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 11:27 PM (pUDQf)

160 Nancy Pelosi is originally from Bowel-timore.

Posted by: torquewrench


And Bawbwa Boxer, the perennial runner up to stupidest Rep in Congress, is from New Jerk City, New Jerk.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 01, 2016 11:28 PM (A/3fN)

161 If the left tends to not reproduce as much then where in the hell do they keep coming from to take over state after state? Is it invasion of the body snatchers?
Posted by: TheQuietMan at April 01, 2016 10:50 PM (45oDG)


The portion of the left known as The Free Shit Army is reproducing like gangbusters.

Posted by: nerdygirl at April 01, 2016 11:28 PM (+lVUW)

162 >>"There are very few native Californians. Most are transplants from the East coast."


Fuck you, esse.

Posted by: La Raza at April 01, 2016 11:28 PM (F3ax6)

163 He wants to bury the GOP. Forever.


To be fair, its not going to take that much effort. They don't call them the Stupid Party for nothing.

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 01, 2016 11:28 PM (syGA0)

164 Depends on the situation and prospective victim. You'd use an entirely different method for someone who was sick and in the hospital vs someone who is a well known celebrity.
Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:26 PM (GEICT)
***
True. So let's go with the Stranger on a Train scenario - a more or less normal and healthy person who's close to you.

Otto was onto something with the criss-cross idea, because it eliminates motive.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:29 PM (lutOX)

165 Have fun at the concert Farmer

We're headed to Appleton tomorrow for jethro Tull,concert

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin at April 01, 2016 11:29 PM (voOPb)

166 I worked doing roofing with a guy who was shot and stabbed (twice) while he worked on our crew.

He always claimed he would rather be shot twice than stabbed, once.

Posted by: garrett
****

I'd rather associate with those that would do neither, but that is me.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 01, 2016 11:29 PM (hVdx9)

167 160:A bill in California would establish a tax-payer funded suicide hotline to help you kill yourself:


So Suicide Booths, like in Futurama??

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 01, 2016 11:30 PM (syGA0)

168 Garrotte is a bad idea. Too much opportunity for "transfer". Plus you have to be very close. Expect a victim to fight vigorously.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 01, 2016 11:26 PM (hVdx9)
***
Also true, and yet, it is used. Tends to be personal, I'd think.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:30 PM (lutOX)

169 What say you, my morbid colleagues?

Rip their arm off and let them bleed out through their brachial artery. Tried and true method for icing reporters.

Posted by: Insomniac at April 01, 2016 11:30 PM (0mRoj)

170 101 Aloha!
Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 10:24 PM

Hey Cooth. Now that the finance is more amenable to moving out of CA, plans are going better?

Posted by: Farmer at April 01, 2016 11:06 PM (o/90i)



Plans from 3+ years ago are getting the input that was sought and denied.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 11:31 PM (EzgxV)

171 BC - suggestion for a name for the podcast

"Millennial Falcons"

How's that for awful?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:31 PM (o7Ufw)

172 no bad people!1

Posted by: long bow at April 01, 2016 11:31 PM (AG7GB)

173 Meat Loaf is not a sword.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 01, 2016 11:31 PM (VdICR)

174 >>I worked doing roofing with a guy who was shot and stabbed (twice) while he worked on our crew.
-------
I take he was just a poor misunderstood individual

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin at April 01, 2016 11:31 PM (voOPb)

175 "Trump just named Rosie O'Donnell as his VP pick."


*snort*

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 01, 2016 11:31 PM (9ym/8)

176 If the left tends to not reproduce as much then where in the hell do they keep coming from to take over state after state? Is it invasion of the body snatchers?
Posted by: TheQuietMan
****

They are like the cuckoo bird. They indoctrinate the children of others.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 01, 2016 11:31 PM (hVdx9)

177 Rip their arm off and let them bleed out through their brachial artery. Tried and true method for icing reporters.
That's not funny!

Posted by: michelle fields at April 01, 2016 11:32 PM (ioqGj)

178 What say you, my morbid colleagues?

Death by snoo snoo... from Lena Dunham

Posted by: The Morbid Hat at April 01, 2016 11:32 PM (vBeA5)

179 175 Meat Loaf is not a sword.
Posted by: BourbonChicken at April 01, 2016 11:31 PM (VdICR)

It can be a means of dispatch, depending on who made it.

Posted by: Insomniac at April 01, 2016 11:32 PM (0mRoj)

180 Just an image from another Moron I found so cool...great grandma enjoying....

https://www.dropbox.com/s/t9hzdd2q8ccgg5y/P1060744.JPG?dl=0

Best to you J and your wife.

Posted by: Farmer at April 01, 2016 11:32 PM (o/90i)

181 Posted by: The Fools Golden Hat at April 01, 2016 11:27 PM (vBeA5)

Damn tin foil hat wearing idiots! There is no evil plan afoot. Nonsense. Pure nonsense.

Other than that, of course. And that other thing. And that thing there. Oh, and that thing last week. But other than that, wait..forget March. But other than March, we are not trying to destroy America. Ignore 2015. Shit, and 2104.

As a matter of fact, just fuck off and forget we talked.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 11:32 PM (pUDQf)

182 What say you, my morbid colleagues?


Cancer Rays

Posted by: M Romney at April 01, 2016 11:32 PM (o7Ufw)

183 I know damned well that I would not want to get shot with a Broadhead tipped Arrow.

Posted by: garrett at April 01, 2016 11:32 PM (F3ax6)

184 Otto was onto something with the criss-cross idea, because it eliminates motive.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:29 PM (lutOX)


Any plan involving another person is bound to get fucked up.

As for me, grind an ambien up in their drink, when they're asleep I give them a massive dose of insulin. (I'm a type 1 diabetic, so obv I have plenty at hand)

Ambien in the system is no big deal. Insulin is metabolized very quickly and leaves no trace. Insulin needles are incredibly fine, most are 31G, so the odds of finding the puncture mark are incredibly small as well.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:33 PM (GEICT)

185 Arrow to the knee. The depression from no longer being an adventurer like you will kill them.

Posted by: Insomniac at April 01, 2016 11:34 PM (0mRoj)

186 49 Knife vs gun
The classic answer that knife is for personal motives, for rage, or pleasure etc.
Gun is for business.
Obviously there are exceptions. Shooting a guy in the nuts = personal.
Slitting throat from behind, business.
Not that I've given this a lot of thought or anything.

Then there are those who can kill with a typo.
Posted by: @votermom at April 01, 2016 10:49 PM (nbrY/)


There are two true crime networks that I sometimes watch. Justice Network and ID. Judging by these shows a lot of family members are killing each other. And, yes, when police find a knifed victim who has been stabbed 20 times, they know that someone is really pissed off at their spouse.

Posted by: nerdygirl at April 01, 2016 11:34 PM (+lVUW)

187 165
He wants to bury the GOP. Forever.




To be fair, its not going to take that much effort. They don't call them the Stupid Party for nothing.

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 01, 2016 11:28 PM (syGA0)

Truf.

Posted by: average biped at April 01, 2016 11:34 PM (6tGoF)

188 113 I know an EMT who says people survive an amazing number of stab wounds, a dozen or more.
Placement matters, I guess.

Posted by: navybrat at April 01, 2016 11:09 PM (8QG



There was a guy I met in accounting class at the University of Casual Sun Bathing. Had been in the Secret Service (which, besides protecting worthless assholes, also chases counterfeiters). He informed me that it was better to be shot than stabbed because you could feel it going in when you were stabbed (had experience with both).

Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 11:34 PM (EzgxV)

189 Kill them, then play the race card at the trial.

Posted by: O J at April 01, 2016 11:35 PM (7qAYi)

190 "Millennial Falcons"

How's that for awful?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 01, 2016 11:31 PM (o7Ufw)



Hahahahahahha. Well played, sir.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:35 PM (GEICT)

191 This isn't good for Texas in the long run. Number of Californians moving to Texas hits highest level in nearly a decade. Look at what happened to Colorado and Nevada. Unless these newcomers change their voting patterns, they're going to be electing folks that will implement policies that they have been fleeing. Eventually, they won't have any place to flee to.

Texas is completely and utterly doomed. Between the refugees from California and the illegals, it will flip Democrat, and probably sooner rather than later. Any Texan who thinks otherwise is in denial.

This, of course, is a key goal of the Left.

Posted by: rickl at April 01, 2016 11:35 PM (sdi6R)

192 Colorado Alex congrats on the schooling thing! Sounds like quite the challenge

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin at April 01, 2016 11:35 PM (voOPb)

193 In the interests of inclusiveness, we demand that only non-male/white/straight/Christian/Americans be granted admission!

Hey, where'd everybody go?

Posted by: Stanford's Finest Snowflakes at April 01, 2016 11:35 PM (RrDm2)

194 Knives are an indispensable everyday carry item.

Karambits, in particular, can be incredibly effective.

Anatomy is anatomy is anatomy. whether they be 6 fot 6 250, or 5 foot 6 150.... cut certain things and the body don't work too well.

Posted by: Hillbillyking at April 01, 2016 11:35 PM (wkqRz)

195 >>I take he was just a poor misunderstood individual


Dude was a good laborer. When he wasn't in a Recovery Room.



Posted by: garrett at April 01, 2016 11:36 PM (F3ax6)

196 >>>I'm thinking there's a shot of tequila around here.

Ok, I'm in. When I said I quit earlier, that wasn't a lie. I did quit. Now I'm starting back up.

Posted by: DC in River City at April 01, 2016 11:36 PM (e+1S5)

197 I just received word that chemjeff has not, in reality, been posting from or living anywhere near a college campus for the last month. His employer is looking for him and police found hundreds of bags of marshmallows in his home in various states of melt.

Posted by: Iforgot at April 01, 2016 11:36 PM (NHQQx)

198 Thanks. It's nice to be moving forward with my life.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 01, 2016 11:36 PM (mbSny)

199 The folks my mother wanted to snuff were exposed to certain occupational hazards attendant upon their chosen profession. I doubt very much it would have been looked into too deeply had they ended up dead.

But the problem was her plan was too good - it showed a level of attention to detail that would not escape notice, and would, in fact, cause LE to dig and dig and dig.

From what I can tell, most killings are sort of simple, almost spontaneous affairs; it's when the investigators see signs of forethought and planning that they really get curious.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:36 PM (lutOX)

200 "I know damned well that I would not want to get shot with a Broadhead tipped Arrow."


Nope. Just shoot me with a gun.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 01, 2016 11:36 PM (9ym/8)

201 North Carolina, Chicago Won't Take Your Trans 'Intolerance,' Rahm Say

http://dnain.fo/22X98s0

Sure, we have skyrocketing crime, the highest homicide rate in the country, punitive taxes, daily protests. But we have weird sexual perverts in ladies bathroom so come on out!

Posted by: CrustyB at April 01, 2016 11:37 PM (Hnglq)

202 Have fun at the concert Farmer
We're headed to Appleton tomorrow for jethro Tull,concert
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin at April 01, 2016 11:29 PM

Enjoy, we'd like that too. Last saw them well, many yrs ago.

Posted by: Farmer at April 01, 2016 11:37 PM (o/90i)

203 Also true, and yet, it is used. Tends to be personal, I'd think.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine
****

Well you said perfect crime. The garrotte is far less than perfect. In this day and age, I would argue that video surveillance is your biggest enemy.
Even if you leave behind no evidence at the crime scene, video evidence can be enough to convict you.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 01, 2016 11:37 PM (hVdx9)

204 Insulin needles are incredibly fine, most are 31G, so the odds of finding the puncture mark are incredibly small as well.
Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:33 PM (GEICT)
***
That you, Klaus von Bulow?

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:38 PM (lutOX)

205 Fees them foods containing non-Moochelle-approved amounts of sugar and salt. That'll fix 'em real good.

Posted by: Insomniac at April 01, 2016 11:38 PM (0mRoj)

206 Here we go. Daughter in Law is in the hospital. They induced labor because she is over a week overdue. Now waiting for my grand daughter Lily to be born. Plus daughter the elder told me yesterday she is pregnant again. Grandson is only 7 month old, but daughter is almost 40, so she has to hurry up. Daughter the younger, right now deployed in Afghanistan has no intentions right now to follow in footsteps of siblings

Posted by: GrandMa Bell at April 01, 2016 11:38 PM (RLdcX)

207 "Between the refugees from California and the illegals, it will flip Democrat, and probably sooner rather than later. Any Texan who thinks otherwise is in denial. "


Probably so. We've been holding them back fairly well for a while now but it's probably in the cards.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 01, 2016 11:38 PM (9ym/8)

208 The Medical Procedure for repairing a stab wound sounds like less fun than the stabbing, itself.

Posted by: garrett at April 01, 2016 11:38 PM (F3ax6)

209 Being stabbed sucks.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at April 01, 2016 11:38 PM (pUDQf)

210
I just received word that chemjeff has not, in reality, been posting
from or living anywhere near a college campus for the last month. His
employer is looking for him and police found hundreds of bags of
marshmallows in his home in various states of melt.

Posted by: Iforgot at April 01, 2016 11:36 PM (NHQQx)

If by "melt" you mean carbonized, unverified but plausible.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 01, 2016 11:40 PM (T78UI)

211 150 I'd rather be shot than stabbed.

I'm currently drinking Maker's.

I got accepted to Cal Lutherans grad school for quantitative economics.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 01, 2016 11:25 PM (mbSny)



My sister went to Cal Lu. Are you Lutheran already?

Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 11:40 PM (EzgxV)

212 I got accepted to Cal Lutherans grad school for quantitative economics.
Posted by: Colorado Alex
---------

Heh.
John Derbyshire is a Quant. Congratulations! And, you're in good company.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 11:40 PM (yddCj)

213 If you like the theater, and you like stabbing, then the song sung by the ladies in prison is for you.

"He walked in to my knife. 26 times!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrrz54UtkCc

Posted by: navybrat at April 01, 2016 11:40 PM (8QGte)

214 Congrats Alex.

Posted by: garrett at April 01, 2016 11:41 PM (F3ax6)

215 Congrats, Alex!

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:41 PM (GEICT)

216 Cthulu, I'm a filthy papist.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 01, 2016 11:42 PM (mbSny)

217 Yes. Congrats, Alex.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 01, 2016 11:43 PM (9ym/8)

218 216 Cthulu, I'm a filthy papist.
Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 01, 2016 11:42 PM (mbSny)

You have up hygiene for Lent?

Posted by: Insomniac at April 01, 2016 11:43 PM (0mRoj)

219 My EDC is a kukri.

I also carry a couple of heavy books/ledgers and a mil spec laptop in my backpack to form a sort of improvised bullet-proof vest.

I would have no problem taking an attacker out with a blade. None at all.

I plan on adding a pistol to the mix in the next year. .40 caliber Smith & Wesson, I think.

Posted by: An Poc ar Buile at April 01, 2016 11:43 PM (1zS3A)

220 Gave not have. Damn iPhone.

Posted by: Insomniac at April 01, 2016 11:44 PM (0mRoj)

221 Insomniac, just hot showers.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 01, 2016 11:44 PM (mbSny)

222 Poor Me on your newsstands now.

Link in nic.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 01, 2016 11:44 PM (T78UI)

223 Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:33 PM (GEICT)
You really thought this through.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 01, 2016 11:45 PM (egOGm)

224 That's not funny, Burnt Toast!

Posted by: michelle fields at April 01, 2016 11:46 PM (ioqGj)

225 North Carolina, Chicago Won't Take Your Trans 'Intolerance,' Rahm Say

http://dnain.fo/22X98s0
------------------

The article is bullshit. It's ALL bullshit. The only thing the law says is that entities can not be COMPELLED by city or county statute to allow mixed sex use of restrooms, showers, changing rooms, and etc.

ANYONE who WANTS to have their facilities unrestricted is perfectly free to do so.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 11:46 PM (yddCj)

226 184 Otto was onto something with the criss-cross idea, because it eliminates motive.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:29 PM (lutOX)

Any plan involving another person is bound to get fucked up.

As for me, grind an ambien up in their drink, when they're asleep I give them a massive dose of insulin. (I'm a type 1 diabetic, so obv I have plenty at hand)

Ambien in the system is no big deal. Insulin is metabolized very quickly and leaves no trace. Insulin needles are incredibly fine, most are 31G, so the odds of finding the puncture mark are incredibly small as well.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:33 PM (GEICT)



A good choice -- especially if the injection site is covered by hair and/or is semi-internal (e.g. mucous membranes).

Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 11:46 PM (EzgxV)

227 Famous one liners before the kill:


"Hand over my goddamn car keys, I can drive, no problem"

Teddy Kennedy

Posted by: Donna&&&&V (a white) (whitely brandishing ampersand privilege ) at April 01, 2016 11:47 PM (P8951)

228 you ny

people are weak!

Posted by: ace of mace at April 01, 2016 11:47 PM (AG7GB)

229 I got shot once - a .22, ND from a friend I was hunting with.

Got me right in the upper leg - thank god it was there.

Didn't feel a thing for a few seconds. I think the time I drove a chisel into my palm was more painful.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:48 PM (lutOX)

230 You really thought this through.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 01, 2016 11:45 PM (egOGm)



Sorta. I mean, I've been diabetic for close to 30 years, so I've long been aware of insulin and it's risks and the nefarious use to which it could be put.

The hard part is administering. How do you give someone a shot without them knowing?

The ambien thing I just came up with real quick once he asked.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:48 PM (GEICT)

231 I plan on adding a pistol to the mix in the next year. .40 caliber Smith & Wesson, I think.

Posted by: An Poc ar Buile
------------

You have seen the thermite cannon, right?

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 11:48 PM (yddCj)

232 Drive by a gas station? You're picked up on camera.
Drive by a bank? On camera.
Drive by a grocery store, parking lot cameras see you.
It's hard out there for a would be murderer.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 01, 2016 11:48 PM (hVdx9)

233 or tin.

Posted by: copper at April 01, 2016 11:48 PM (AG7GB)

234 Evenin' everyone.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at April 01, 2016 11:48 PM (YJmuy)

235 Fuck the fog. I know what I'm doing.
Mmm. Good chowdah!

Posted by: zombie john-john junior kennedy at April 01, 2016 11:49 PM (ioqGj)

236 I just want to be the 97th person to say Congrats Alex

Posted by: DC in River City at April 01, 2016 11:49 PM (e+1S5)

237 225: Yea, but that would require to actually READ the law. Its much more fun to demagogue and preen like a peacock. Getting your self righteous smug on is quite the rush apparently.

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 01, 2016 11:49 PM (syGA0)

238 bronze.

Posted by: fag at April 01, 2016 11:49 PM (AG7GB)

239 236 I just want to be the 97th person to say Congrats Alex

Posted by: DC in River City at April 01, 2016 11:49 PM (e+1S5)



Well you fucked it up. You're the 98th.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:50 PM (GEICT)

240 When you have to shoot...shoot, don't talk.

Posted by: Tuco at April 01, 2016 11:50 PM (FkBIv)

241 Sure! Put me out of a job!

Posted by: Flint Arrow-head Knappers Assoc. at April 01, 2016 11:50 PM (ioqGj)

242 for the sack of the kingdom/

Posted by: tin me............ at April 01, 2016 11:50 PM (AG7GB)

243 Posted by: GrandMa Bell at April 01, 2016 11:38 PM (RLdcX)

Whoa! Lots of little blessings on the way! May all of your future grandbabies enter the world safe and sound and may their moms have relatively easy labors.

Posted by: Donna&&&&V (a white) (whitely brandishing ampersand privilege ) at April 01, 2016 11:50 PM (P8951)

244 Evening horde. How goes it this fine summer eve.


Wait...not summer. Sure as hell feels like it.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at April 01, 2016 11:50 PM (hlMPp)

245 @ 156,

Uncle P.....Brave is Brave, regardless of ideology. True courage transends.

I've had the pleasure to talk to a fellow who piloted a Challenger Mission in 1984.

Uniquley Keen gentleman. I reckon thats just par for being one of 549 people who REALLY know what the world looks like.


Posted by: Hillbillyking at April 01, 2016 11:51 PM (wkqRz)

246 Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:48 PM (GEICT)
***
Good stuff, sir.

Sorta-kinda working on a novel/short story. There's no killing in it, but these things are useful exercises.

And if any group of people would know how to do it right, I knew it'd be the Horde.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 01, 2016 11:51 PM (lutOX)

247 Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 01, 2016 11:48 PM (GE
Or you could get them wasted first till they pass out cold, then the injection.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 01, 2016 11:52 PM (egOGm)

248 How about mercury fulminate?

Posted by: zombie walter white at April 01, 2016 11:52 PM (ioqGj)

249 " When you have to shoot...shoot, don't talk.
Posted by: Tuco "


And bribe the other guy to take the fall for the gun.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 01, 2016 11:52 PM (9ym/8)

250 any dog owner.
owns a cat.

what a funny person.

Posted by: the cat at April 01, 2016 11:52 PM (AG7GB)

251 Last April Fool's joke - Bill O'Reilly's plaid suit & pink tie he wore when he interviewed prof. Beer Summit, Jr.

Posted by: Bebe Dahl at April 01, 2016 11:53 PM (yNyJy)

252 Congrats Alex!

Now study hard, come out the top of your class, start a business, employ a bunch of 'rons and ettes.....

Then wonder where it went wrong

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at April 01, 2016 11:53 PM (hlMPp)

253 216 Cthulu, I'm a filthy papist.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 01, 2016 11:42 PM (mbSny)




For now.



And, BTW, the 'rents and myself are more "relaxed agnostics" than anything else -- if we get a phone call and the Caller ID reads "Jehovah", we'll think about it. But the sister now has two in-laws in the clergy and is raising Lutheran kids.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 11:54 PM (EzgxV)

254 Rahm can't let a crisis go to waste when his city is flowing in blood

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at April 01, 2016 11:54 PM (voOPb)

255 Yea, but that would require to actually READ the law. Its much more fun to demagogue and preen like a peacock. Getting your self righteous smug on is quite the rush apparently.
Posted by: Puddleglum
-------------

Yeah, the reaction has been much, much stupid on display. Major corporations threatening to leave, etc., as though some major change has occurred. In point of fact, everything the day after the bill was signed was the same as the day before.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 11:54 PM (yddCj)

256 Alex, congrats and just carry a jello salad with you on campus and tell the Lutherans you're invited to a potluck after class. You'll pass, unless you wear rosary beads around your neck or something.

Posted by: Donna&&&&V (a white) (whitely brandishing ampersand privilege ) at April 01, 2016 11:55 PM (P8951)

257 Congrats Alex

Posted by: The Political Hat at April 01, 2016 11:55 PM (vBeA5)

258 >>>Well you fucked it up. You're the 98th.

Eh. Story of my life.

Posted by: DC in River City at April 01, 2016 11:55 PM (e+1S5)

259 Last April Fool's joke - Bill O'Reilly's plaid suit & pink tie he wore when he interviewed prof. Beer Summit, Jr.
Posted by: Bebe Dahl
-------

I saw that. Plaid. Maybe his flunkies are afraid to say anything.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 11:56 PM (yddCj)

260 That dog is really working his meat flaps.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at April 01, 2016 11:56 PM (R+30W)

261 I just received word that chemjeff has not, in reality, been posting
from or living anywhere near a college campus for the last month. His
employer is looking for him and police found hundreds of bags of
marshmallows in his home in various states of melt.



Maybe the Muslims got him.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at April 01, 2016 11:57 PM (oKE6c)

262 So walked into 7-11 before coming home and overheard 'damn, you leakin'

"Is it bad?"


Always comforting to hear.


On the plus side, I got to use my seemingly 5000+ piece med kit in my trunk.

Dude just has a split eyebrow but damn head wounds bleed like hell.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at April 01, 2016 11:58 PM (hlMPp)

263 So, what's up with velociman? He's a good dude, but went off blogging into tweeting and I haven't kept up.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 11:58 PM (EzgxV)

264 And Bawbwa Boxer, the perennial runner up to stupidest Rep in Congress, is from New Jerk City, New Jerk.



Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 01, 2016 11:28 PM (A/3fN)

Now that's not fair. She's always in the mix for stupidest legislator in Congress. It just hasn't been here time yet, that's all.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at April 02, 2016 12:02 AM (oKE6c)

265 An interesting article about murder-by-insulin:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2235920/

Seems concealing the injection site would be essential.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:03 AM (lutOX)

266 Or you could get them wasted first till they pass out cold, then the injection.
Posted by: CaliGirl at April 01, 2016 11:52 PM (egOGm)



Alcohol is a variant. You can't make them drink. There's no pure way to tell how drunk they are in relation to passing out and staying passed out.

You crush up an ambien or two and they drink that? Nighty fucking night.

Easy to explain.

"Omg. She/he had been complaining about headaches and that he/she couldn't sleep. Asked if he/she could have one of mine, I have a prescription, to try and get some rest. I didn't think it was a problem. OMG...did I? Did...is that what...? No. Don't tell me that's what caused this?!?!"

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 02, 2016 12:03 AM (GEICT)

267 that black doggeh, er kitteh at the top has some long
whiskers... or is that a buck dear?
heh

go Cruz

Posted by: micky at April 02, 2016 12:03 AM (o5vMc)

268 >>>This isn't good for Texas in the long run. Number of Californians moving to Texas hits highest level in nearly a decade.

I don't imagine all those new voters moving in from Mexico will help either.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at April 02, 2016 12:03 AM (R+30W)

269 So Obama is about to find something out. He did Hillary a giant political favor by making her Secretary of State, and then she used it to set up fabulous deals for the Chelsea Legacy Foundation without cutting him in on anything and without helping him out politically. He did her this favor and she sneaked off and abused it to advance the interests of only herself, clearly with an eye to having a more influential and powerful presidency than his. I don't think the Godfather is going to like that. I think he'll crown his lesser, duller servant who worshipped at his feet and never even had the wit to take secret advantage of his largesse.

Posted by: Iforgot at April 02, 2016 12:04 AM (sdPF/)

270 Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 02, 2016 12:03 AM (GEICT)

Where did this conversation start?

*pulls out notepad

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at April 02, 2016 12:04 AM (hlMPp)

271 The article is bullshit. It's ALL bullshit. The only
thing the law says is that entities can not be COMPELLED by city or
county statute to allow mixed sex use of restrooms, showers, changing
rooms, and etc.



ANYONE who WANTS to have their facilities unrestricted is perfectly free to do so.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 01, 2016 11:46 PM (yddCj)

Building Codes typically have minimal requirements for restroom facilities.

Years ago I sat on a board where they were pushing a mandate for waterless urinals 'for the environment'. I suggested if they are concerned about 'the environment' that they consider unisex restrooms with a single slit trench constructed of tile down the center of the room and once a day it would be flushed from the high end - saves 'the environment' by eliminating a door, no partitions, no porcelain, and only one flush device.

Didn't go over so well as they really weren't that concerned about 'the environment' if they were impacted.BTW, the men didn't see a problem.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 12:04 AM (T78UI)

272 Seems concealing the injection site would be essential.
Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:03 AM (lutOX)

******

Beneath the tongue seems like it would be ideal.

Posted by: Tim in GA at April 02, 2016 12:06 AM (YLidQ)

273 263 So, what's up with velociman? He's a good dude, but went off blogging into tweeting and I haven't kept up.
Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 11:58 PM (EzgxV)


His brother posted yesterday evening that he was in bad shape and had to be transported to the hospital via EMS.

Facebook back and forth with his sister. Earlier today she said he was really weak, but was getting good care at the hospital. Their brother was on his way to the hospital and they were waiting on test results that had been run overnight.

She updated me again an hour or so ago with: "He is still going through some tests but he ate a little and was feeling better today."

I don't know the exact nature of what's wrong and family isn't volunteering, so it's not my business/place to go nosing around.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 02, 2016 12:06 AM (GEICT)

274 Wonderful content in the ONT!

Posted by: sinmi at April 02, 2016 12:06 AM (sVNKh)

275 Never mind. Followed the breadcrumbs and read upthread.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at April 02, 2016 12:07 AM (hlMPp)

276
An interesting article about murder-by-insulin:

There was a Quincy, M.E. episode where they did that.
Probably other shows as well.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at April 02, 2016 12:07 AM (FkBIv)

277 Some number of the Californians fleeing to Texas are business owners, however. They know whereof they flee.

Posted by: Iforgot at April 02, 2016 12:08 AM (sdPF/)

278 Thanks, everyone.

I was also accepted to San Diego State University as well, so I have to decide which way to go. Cal Lu is only a year, and the classes are in the evening, but my company has a large presence in San Diego, which means an easier time finding work with the company.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 02, 2016 12:08 AM (kqIMj)

279 April 1st? Well, someone has to do it.

Here bygynneth the Book of the Tales of Caunterbury


Whan that Aprill, with his shoures soote
The droghte of March hath perced to the roote
And bathed every veyne in swich licour,
Of which vertu engendred is the flour;
5 Whan Zephirus eek with his sweete breeth
Inspired hath in every holt and heeth
The tendre croppes, and the yonge sonne
Hath in the Ram his halfe cours yronne,
And smale foweles maken melodye,
10 That slepen al the nyght with open eye-
(So priketh hem Nature in hir corages);
Thanne longen folk to goon on pilgrimages
And palmeres for to seken straunge strondes
To ferne halwes, kowthe in sondry londes;
15 And specially from every shires ende
Of Engelond, to Caunterbury they wende,
The hooly blisful martir for to seke
That hem hath holpen, whan that they were seeke.

Posted by: Chaucer at April 02, 2016 12:09 AM (yddCj)

280 Maybe the Muslims got him.


Posted by: Jay Guevara at April 01, 2016 11:57 PM (oKE6c)

The initiation hazing make teh gey college frat boy stuff seem sedate.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 12:09 AM (T78UI)

281 Beneath the tongue seems like it would be ideal.
Posted by: Tim in GA at April 02, 2016 12:06 AM (YLidQ)
***
better hope like Hell the intended is unconscious....ouch.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:09 AM (lutOX)

282 All the CA folks I know who talk of moving to TX are of the scary right-wing death beast variety, without exception. Motivated by the predictable things. Also know people actually moving to AZ, soon, for the same reasons.


Unscientific sample, FWIW.


Posted by: rhomboid at April 02, 2016 12:10 AM (QDnY+)

283 Diogenes at April 01, 2016 10:55 PM (08Znv)
Fifth generation Californian here, by way of Virginia and Texas.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:11 AM (egOGm)

284 272 Seems concealing the injection site would be essential.
Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:03 AM (lutOX)

******

Beneath the tongue seems like it would be ideal.

Posted by: Tim in GA at April 02, 2016 12:06 AM (YLidQ)



Up the crapper behind a turd is even more subtle.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 12:11 AM (EzgxV)

285 You crush up an ambien or two and they drink that? Nighty fucking night.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 02, 2016 12:03 AM (GEICT)
***
I recall a terrible bout of insomnia - my PD medications cause that sometimes - that the Future Empress offered to end by giving me one of her Ambien.

Holy shit.....like a sledgehammer.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:11 AM (lutOX)

286 Barry Eislers John Rain books are pretty fuckin good.

Given the discussion of mean's and methods, some of the Horde will probably enjoy them.

Posted by: Hillbillyking at April 02, 2016 12:12 AM (wkqRz)

287 Or you could get them wasted first till they pass out cold, then the injection.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 01, 2016 11:52 PM (egOGm)


File a missing person - S/he/it isn't here anymore, took overnight bag and wallet, no note. End of story.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 12:12 AM (T78UI)

288 "Here bygynneth the Book of the Tales of Caunterbury "


Remember that from high school. About every third word makes any sense.

Ye Olde English were verily enfarkenated.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 12:12 AM (9ym/8)

289 282 All the CA folks I know who talk of moving to TX are of the scary right-wing death beast variety, without exception. Motivated by the predictable things. Also know people actually moving to AZ, soon, for the same reasons.
Unscientific sample, FWIW.
Posted by: rhomboid at April 02, 2016 12:10 AM (QDnY+)



Count Famiglia Guevara in that sample.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at April 02, 2016 12:12 AM (oKE6c)

290 Grad school in a year?

Figures my youngest decides to go to a 3 year program

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at April 02, 2016 12:13 AM (voOPb)

291 "Fifth generation Californian here, by way of Virginia and Texas."


I knew there was something "right" with you, cg.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 12:15 AM (9ym/8)

292 >>Ye Olde English were verily enfarkenated.

Farking Shakespeare

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at April 02, 2016 12:15 AM (voOPb)

293 273 263 So, what's up with velociman? He's a good dude, but went off blogging into tweeting and I haven't kept up.
Posted by: cthulhu at April 01, 2016 11:58 PM (EzgxV)

His brother posted yesterday evening that he was in bad shape and had to be transported to the hospital via EMS.

Facebook back and forth with his sister. Earlier today she said he was really weak, but was getting good care at the hospital. Their brother was on his way to the hospital and they were waiting on test results that had been run overnight.

She updated me again an hour or so ago with: "He is still going through some tests but he ate a little and was feeling better today."

I don't know the exact nature of what's wrong and family isn't volunteering, so it's not my business/place to go nosing around.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 02, 2016 12:06 AM (GEICT)



There's enough to pray for a full recovery and support for his state of mind, rather than mercy and comfort to his family. I tend to be persnickety about understanding what to pray for.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 12:15 AM (EzgxV)

294 Remember that from high school. About every third word makes any sense.

Ye Olde English were verily enfarkenated.
Posted by: Ricardo Kill
-------------
Yeah, we had to memorize it. I can still do the first verse in passable Middle English, if I have been drinking.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 02, 2016 12:16 AM (yddCj)

295 Burnt toast
No body, no murder. Do a breaking bad and dissolve the body in a plastic tub of was it acid? Just don't use the bathtub.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:16 AM (egOGm)

296 Man, I just got my pool water up to snuff i.e. no longer green. Now it's gonna be a tad chilly to take a dip.


Get yourself a heater CDR, it'll add at least two months swim time, well worth it.

Posted by: All Teh Meh at April 02, 2016 12:17 AM (hQ4EJ)

297 265 An interesting article about murder-by-insulin:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2235920/

Seems concealing the injection site would be essential.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:03 AM (lutOX)



Ah. See, his problem was this: Had he left her in her bed, she might well have been dead in the morning, or at least have suffered irreversible brain damage, and all of the insulin he had injected would have been absorbed into her bloodstream and destroyed. There would have been no 'smoking gun' for the pathologists and toxicologists to find, and there would have been no case against him.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 02, 2016 12:17 AM (GEICT)

298 CO Alex, SDSU? Still Drunk, Still Uneducated, as the current nickname goes?


You probably know already, but SD is still much more livable than most of the greater LA area (though the traffic seems to get worse by the month). Depending on your particular likes/dislikes/interests, of course. I just mean size, crowds, traffic, density.


Probably not material to the decision, of course, and I don't know Cal Lutheran at all, but the "student body" at SDSU is, um ..... wow. Youngsters, of course.


In high school, a regular event was to go "watch registration" at State in August. Oh my.



Posted by: rhomboid at April 02, 2016 12:18 AM (QDnY+)

299 little bilk

Posted by: the cat at April 02, 2016 12:18 AM (AG7GB)

300 >>memorize it. I can still do the first verse in passable Middle English, if I have been drinking.

---------
We will make sure you're lubricated Mike

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at April 02, 2016 12:18 AM (voOPb)

301 Geoffery Chaucer hath a blog:

I read this many years ago, and the guy's genius, and certainly a moron in good standing:

http://houseoffame.blogspot.com/

Don't miss his "Lynnes of Picke-Vppe":

-Shulle we maken the cindreblokke to synge?

-Woldstow haue me shyfte thyne voweles?

-Were thou yn my seisin, ich wolde nevir escheat on thee.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:18 AM (lutOX)

302 Ambien is highly addictive. John Stamos recently went thru rehab & said the alcohol detox was really tough but the Ambien and Dannon yogurt withdrawals were his real bugaboo.

Posted by: Bebe Dahl at April 02, 2016 12:18 AM (yNyJy)

303 There's enough to pray for a full recovery and support for his state of mind, rather than mercy and comfort to his family. I tend to be persnickety about understanding what to pray for.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 12:15 AM (EzgxV)



Yup. Same here. The more specific a prayer I can offer, the better I feel about it.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 02, 2016 12:18 AM (GEICT)

304 No body, no murder. Do a breaking bad and dissolve the body in a plastic tub of was it acid? Just don't use the bathtub.

Posted by: CaliGirl
****

Mythbusters showed how that doesn't exactly work.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 02, 2016 12:19 AM (hVdx9)

305 We will make sure you're lubricated Mike

That's more than I ever get.

Posted by: the chicken at April 02, 2016 12:19 AM (6FqZa)

306 Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 12:15 AM (9ym/
My mother's ancestors arrived in Virginia aboard the Nassau in 1701.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:19 AM (egOGm)

307 Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 02, 2016 12:17 AM (GEICT)
***
I saw that. Dude got impatient.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:20 AM (lutOX)

308 306: Big deal. I arrived in Virginia in a 94' Chevy Cavalier and you don't see me bragging about it.

;-)

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 02, 2016 12:21 AM (syGA0)

309 Eisler lists his sources at the end of his books.

A treasure trove of USEFUL info. Gotta Love an author who includes information that can educate his readers.

I don't agree with his personal opinions on a number of subjects......but as long as he writes good books, fuck it.

Posted by: Hillbillyking at April 02, 2016 12:21 AM (wkqRz)

310 MH - I can do 'The Shooting of Dan McGrew' as an encore, "A bunch of the boys were whooping it up in the Malamute saloon..."

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 02, 2016 12:21 AM (yddCj)

311 If by "melt" you mean carbonized, unverified but plausible.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 01, 2016 11:40 PM (T78UI)
-------------------------

I'm just going by the police report.

Posted by: iforgot at April 02, 2016 12:21 AM (5o5ek)

312 Ye Olde English were verily enfarkenated.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 12:12 AM (9ym/


It is Middle English.

Þis is Old English:

Fæder ūre þū þe eart on heofonum, Sī þīn nama ġehālgod. Tōbecume þīn rīċe, ġewurþe þīn willa, on eorðan swā swā on heofonum. Ūre ġedæġhwāmlīcan hlāf syle ūs tō dæġ, and forġyf ūs ūre gyltas, swā swā wē forġyfað ūrum gyltendum. And ne ġelǣd þū ūs on costnunge, ac ālȳs ūs of yfel e.Sōþlīċe.

Posted by: Se Léodweardprætt Hæt at April 02, 2016 12:22 AM (vBeA5)

313 test

Posted by: Se Léodweardprætt Hæt at April 02, 2016 12:22 AM (vBeA5)

314 I just realized season six of Justified is free on Prime now, so...bye.

Posted by: DC in River City at April 02, 2016 12:23 AM (e+1S5)

315 F**k you Pixy's hamsters.

Posted by: Se Léodweardprætt Hæt at April 02, 2016 12:23 AM (vBeA5)

316
Not to sound like Otto from "Strangers on a Train," but let's horde-source a 'perfect' murder.

Touch of Evil - strangulation with a thin cord is held out as nearly ideal, and there are many advocates of the garrotte, 'tis true.

Poison is almost always detected. Gunshots are messy, and tend to be loud.

What say you, my morbid colleagues?Posted by: Your Decidely Devious Uncle Palpatine at April 01,

---
Insulin. I imagine somewhere between 100 and 150 units.
It occurs naturally in the body and I don't believe they test for it in a tox screen.

Posted by: Darth Randall at April 02, 2016 12:23 AM (KlVdw)

317 One more Chaucer Lynne of Picke-Vppe:

--By my soule, thou art a verye mappe of helle. For thy face lyk the rivere Styx wil make me swere oothes neuer to be fforsworn, and thy embrace lyk the Lethe shal make me foryet al else, and lyk vnto the Flegeton thyn arse ys ON FYRE!

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:23 AM (lutOX)

318 Hulu had a real good April Fools promo. Huludatr. It's a dating service that creates perfect matches based on people's television viewing preferences. It shows all these happy couples just sitting on the couch watching Columbo or some dumb old thing and testifying that they've never been so happy and they've met the guy/girl of their dreams.

Posted by: iforgot at April 02, 2016 12:24 AM (5o5ek)

319 Amend,

Signed, hampers

Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 12:24 AM (OC+TJ)

320 Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 02, 2016 12:19 AM (hVdx9)
I have a hard time imagining murdering someone. If I had to defend myself, I would shoot them, then call my lawyer.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:24 AM (egOGm)

321 Hmm. An outbreak of red diamonds. This can't be good.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 02, 2016 12:25 AM (yddCj)

322 "... swere oothes neuer to be fforsworn..."

Heh.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 02, 2016 12:26 AM (yddCj)

323 "I arrived in Virginia in a 94' Chevy Cavalier "

Well, nobody's saying there's anything wrong with a '94 Cavalier but.....

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 12:28 AM (9ym/8)

324
If you can get close enough, isn't smothering someone in their sleep an undetectable murder method? It would help if they were dead drunk.

Posted by: iforgot at April 02, 2016 12:29 AM (5o5ek)

325 Well, nobody's saying there's anything wrong with a '94 Cavalier but.....
Posted by: Ricardo Kill
--------------

I will.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 02, 2016 12:29 AM (yddCj)

326 leaves marks

Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 12:30 AM (OC+TJ)

327 I have a hard time imagining murdering someone. If I had to defend myself, I would shoot them, then call my lawyer.
Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:24 AM (egOGm)
***
Well, I'm much the same. I think most people are.

But, as an intellectual exercise, it is interesting to try to figure out how to do it and get away with it.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:30 AM (lutOX)

328 If you can get close enough, isn't smothering someone in their sleep an undetectable murder method? It would help if they were dead drunk.

Posted by: iforgot at April 02, 2016 12:29 AM (5o5ek)


I believe that many times this results in bruising around the mouth and nose. Plus it's possible that fabric/feathers/etc can end up in the mouth/throat/lungs.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 02, 2016 12:30 AM (GEICT)

329 Today was opening day for trout in NY.

Not much better eating than Brook Trout split and broiled with lemon butter and a dash of salt and pepper.

Just proves that life,more often than not, is good.

Posted by: irongrampa at April 02, 2016 12:30 AM (P/8aq)

330 Ah, I seem insulin has already been suggested. I wouldadd that if one does it, they shouldn't leave the used syringes lying around to clue the police into what happened, unless the victim was already a diabetic. Then they might assume accidental overdose. I've seen a couple of those.

Posted by: Darth Randall at April 02, 2016 12:30 AM (KlVdw)

331 "It is Middle English. "



Pardon me.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 12:31 AM (9ym/8)

332 It came up because I'd been watching Hitchcock movies, and this is the [mumbles] anniversary of the night I talked my mother out of homicide.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:31 AM (lutOX)

333 Posted by: Puddleglum at April 02, 2016 12:21 AM (syGA0)
You should hold your head high and brag. I would if I moved away from here.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:32 AM (egOGm)

334 " and lyk vnto the Flegeton thyn arse ys ON FYRE!"


Ah, the classics. Timeless.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 12:32 AM (9ym/8)

335 I would not bet on insulin overdose going undetected. If they are a type 1 it would be harder to confirm.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 02, 2016 12:32 AM (hVdx9)

336 If you can get close enough, isn't smothering someone in their sleep an undetectable murder method? It would help if they were dead drunk.
Posted by: iforgot at April 02, 2016 12:29 AM (5o5ek)

****

They can diagnose this via the blood vessels in the eyes (purpura, I think).

Posted by: Tim in GA at April 02, 2016 12:32 AM (kvZfk)

337 Burnt toast

No body, no murder. Do a breaking bad and dissolve the body in a plastic tub of was it acid? Just don't use the bathtub.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:16 AM (egOGm)

None of the above - crazy ex was trying force me out of the apartment I was paying for, s/he/it finally went I figured I'd let the police let me know the whereabouts for filing divorce papers - Cops said, "gone with personal effects? Obviously left on their own. Bye."
Took two years to get that mess cleared up - finally went with public notice to appear in divorce court in local paper.
Crazy ex did reappear a few years later when new spouse called being s/he/it in jail after getting stabby and found my name in personal effects. Laughed my ass off, stabby, yeah, been there, done subjected to that, why didn't you just take the knife, hah ha ha... No, take the knife with your hand, not your gut, ha ha... anyway, told the newest victim where the divorce decree was filed and never heard anything since.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 12:32 AM (T78UI)

338 I'm thinking more and more that the 'perfect murder' would resemble 'a robbery gone wrong.'

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:32 AM (lutOX)

339 have a hard time imagining murdering someone. If I had to defend myself, I would shoot them, then call my lawyer.

Posted by: CaliGirl
****

Yes. Big difference between killing and murdering.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 02, 2016 12:33 AM (hVdx9)

340 Ambien is highly addictive. John Stamos recently
went thru rehab said the alcohol detox was really tough but the
Ambien and Dannon yogurt withdrawals were his real bugaboo.

Posted by: Bebe Dahl at April 02, 2016 12:18 AM (yNyJy)


I heard he was sucking dick off the freeway for the price of a cup of greek yogurt.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 02, 2016 12:33 AM (kqIMj)

341 278 Thanks, everyone.

I was also accepted to San Diego State University as well, so I have to decide which way to go. Cal Lu is only a year, and the classes are in the evening, but my company has a large presence in San Diego, which means an easier time finding work with the company.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 02, 2016 12:08 AM (kqIMj)




My gramps had a semi-honorary degree from San Diego State. He was the chief engineer for their TV station for a while before they discovered his paper credentials ended at 8th grade.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 12:33 AM (EzgxV)

342 Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:30 AM (lutOX)
Well, I think trying to make it look like an accidental OD would work. Too much alcohol mixed with pills.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:34 AM (egOGm)

343 But, as an intellectual exercise, it is interesting to try to figure out how to do it and get away with it.
Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine
------------

Yes. But it is a slippery slope:

If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing, and from robbing he next comes to drinking and Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination.
— -- Thomas De Quincey

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 02, 2016 12:35 AM (yddCj)

344 Next idea for a perfect murder. Become a Clinton.

Posted by: Darth Randall at April 02, 2016 12:37 AM (KlVdw)

345 Well, I think trying to make it look like an accidental OD would work. Too much alcohol mixed with pills.
Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:34 AM (egOGm)
***
For practical purposes, I think killers slip up when they try to make a murder or killing look like something else.

Cops see everything every day - your average killer is an amateur when it comes to death. Cops know a hinky set-up when they see one.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:37 AM (lutOX)

346 325 Well, nobody's saying there's anything wrong with a '94 Cavalier but.....
Posted by: Ricardo Kill
--------------

I will.
Posted by: Mike Hammer



I had that car 13 years and only started having problems with it at year 12. Solid car, for me anyway.

Posted by: Puddleglum at April 02, 2016 12:37 AM (syGA0)

347 'Night horde. Have a blessed Saturday.

*back to trolling American horror story FB page....lot of nutters there

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at April 02, 2016 12:38 AM (hlMPp)

348 CO Alex, SDSU? Still Drunk, Still Uneducated, as the current nickname goes?





You probably know already, but SD is still much more livable than
most of the greater LA area (though the traffic seems to get worse by
the month). Depending on your particular likes/dislikes/interests, of
course. I just mean size, crowds, traffic, density.





Probably not material to the decision, of course, and I don't know
Cal Lutheran at all, but the "student body" at SDSU is, um ..... wow.
Youngsters, of course.





In high school, a regular event was to go "watch registration" at State in August. Oh my.









Posted by: rhomboid at April 02, 2016 12:18 AM (QDnY+)


I hadn't heard that one. I've heard stories about the women in San Diego. But ultimately it's a question of which school better fits my work schedule/opportunities and when I can graduate and get the hell out of dodge.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 02, 2016 12:38 AM (kqIMj)

349 "If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing, and from robbing he next comes to drinking and Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination. "


Holy crap. I drink. I procrastinate. I will work on a Sunday to make up for it.


Might as well lock me up now.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 12:39 AM (9ym/8)

350 What say you, my morbid colleagues?
Posted by: . . . Palpatine . . . at April 01, 2016 11:24 PM (lutOX)


Try a Little Priest.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryF2rt0hQiM

Posted by: Kindltot at April 02, 2016 12:39 AM (aKchR)

351 I had that car 13 years and only started having problems with it at year 12. Solid car, for me anyway.
Posted by: Puddleglum
--------------

Well, that would be my point, it would now be 22 years old.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 02, 2016 12:39 AM (yddCj)

352 My gramps had a semi-honorary degree from San Diego
State. He was the chief engineer for their TV station for a while before
they discovered his paper credentials ended at 8th grade.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 12:33 AM (EzgxV)


Basically my undergrad GPA isn't great, and the masters I'm looking at is mostly about getting the paper and some exposure to the more quantitative aspects. I'm not too worried about the reputation of the school, since I can make sure that my classes make me competitive.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 02, 2016 12:41 AM (kqIMj)

353 It always amazes me how many murderers who do a rather good job of the killing itself blow it all by failing to stick the landing, so to speak.

Do your Ambien/insulin thing, your fake suicide, your home invasion, but remember that style points matter.

A few tips, especially for spouses:
-When you "discover" the body, be sure to call 911 before you call anyone else, including your lawyer.
-Do not call the life insurance company before the body is buried.
-Do not, I repeat, do NOT hit on cute chicks at the funeral.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 02, 2016 12:42 AM (T/5A0)

354 Tim in GA
I think that's called petechia.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:42 AM (egOGm)

355 Thomas De Quincey

that fucker should have installed some CO detectors in his house before he crossed me

Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 12:42 AM (OC+TJ)

356 "I had that car 13 years and only started having problems with it at year 12. "


Man, that's impressive.

Posted by: Chevy Volt at April 02, 2016 12:42 AM (9ym/8)

357 My daily driver is a second-hand '95 S-10.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 02, 2016 12:44 AM (yddCj)

358 Tim in GA
I think that's called petechia.
Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:42 AM (egOGm)

******

I do believe you are correct.

Posted by: Tim in GA at April 02, 2016 12:44 AM (BqAWU)

359 357 My daily driver is a second-hand '95 S-10.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 02, 2016 12:44 AM (yddCj)
***
'97 Corolla.

Chick-magnet.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:45 AM (lutOX)

360 Burnt toast,
You are lucky you got out of that situation. Oh my!

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:45 AM (egOGm)

361 There was one mystery I saw where the guy was done-in through nicotine-saturated toilet paper.



(1) Makes for a classic "locked-room" mystery; and



(2) People normally think about naturally occurring substances that "contain" nicotine. Pure nicotine is hell-on-a-ramjet. And,



(3) It absorbs readily and rapidly through mucous membranes.



IIRC, the guy swiped his ass and then clawed through his clothes and his chest using his fingers, leaving a spreading pool of blood that seeped out of the stall. I guess there were reports that people felt their skin was on fire and they had to get it off.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 12:47 AM (EzgxV)

362 353 It always amazes me how many murderers who do a rather good job of the killing itself blow it all by failing to stick the landing, so to speak.

Do your Ambien/insulin thing, your fake suicide, your home invasion, but remember that style points matter.

A few tips, especially for spouses:
-When you "discover" the body, be sure to call 911 before you call anyone else, including your lawyer.
-Do not call the life insurance company before the body is buried.
-Do not, I repeat, do NOT hit on cute chicks at the funeral.
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 02, 2016 12:42 AM (T/5A0)
***
But who doesn't want and need:

Legal counsel
Cash money in-hand
Sympathy-tail

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:48 AM (lutOX)

363 "'97 Corolla.

Chick-magnet."


Oozes practicality, understated-ness, and, value all at the same time.

Perfect.


Posted by: Chevy Volt at April 02, 2016 12:48 AM (9ym/8)

364 I'm curious to read all of your perfect murder plans in the morning.
goodnight everyone. Happy weekend.

Posted by: CaliGirl at April 02, 2016 12:49 AM (egOGm)

365
IIRC, the guy swiped his ass and then clawed through his clothes and his chest using his fingers, leaving a spreading pool of blood that seeped out of the stall. I guess there were reports that people felt their skin was on fire and they had to get it off.
Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 12:47 AM (EzgxV)
***
Blackleaf 40 or something, it was called. a 40% nicotine pesticide.

Nasty....

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:49 AM (lutOX)

366 Niters all.

Posted by: Bebe Dahl at April 02, 2016 12:51 AM (yNyJy)

367
Oh gawd and another Hulu April Fools Day joke: trailer for the upcoming show, "Cooking with Hannibal."

Posted by: iforgot at April 02, 2016 12:51 AM (5o5ek)

368 Oozes practicality, understated-ness, and, value all at the same time.

Perfect.

Posted by: Chevy Volt at April 02, 2016 12:48 AM (9ym/
***
My angel, the Future Empress, thinks it's appalling that I drive such a machine. She's got five cars, herself, and rotates among them.

My dream-car, I'm still waiting for. I want a mid-70's mercedes diesel again. had one a few years ago, and loved it.

Fritz, I called him.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:52 AM (lutOX)

369
352 My gramps had a semi-honorary degree from San Diego
State. He was the chief engineer for their TV station for a while before
they discovered his paper credentials ended at 8th grade.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 12:33 AM (EzgxV)


Basically my undergrad GPA isn't great, and the masters I'm looking at is mostly about getting the paper and some exposure to the more quantitative aspects. I'm not too worried about the reputation of the school, since I can make sure that my classes make me competitive.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 02, 2016 12:41 AM (kqIMj)



They're both good schools, and have some family connection. Chief diff is that Cal Lu is a private, religious school; and SDSU is a public university in the third California Public College system. There'd be a yuge difference in cost if you were a resident.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 12:54 AM (EzgxV)

370 If you are into writing murder mysteries, visit your local college with a criminal justice program and get a copy of the "Forensics Handbook".



Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 12:55 AM (T78UI)

371 Well hell, from reading this thread it seems like it's pretty hard to kill someone and get away with it.

Unless you're a Clinton, of course. Then have at it. Law, schmaw.

Posted by: rickl at April 02, 2016 12:56 AM (sdi6R)

372 Time for the old folk. Fishing with grandkids tomorrow, always fun.


Remember, y'all, that we are Americans, so the head is held HIGH--most especially during these times.

Goodnite, good people. Stay safe.

Posted by: irongrampa at April 02, 2016 12:56 AM (P/8aq)

373 That one liner video was especially great.

Posted by: thathalfrican - be water my friend at April 02, 2016 12:57 AM (R5HRU)

374 370 If you are into writing murder mysteries, visit your local college with a criminal justice program and get a copy of the "Forensics Handbook".

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 12:55 AM (T78UI)
***
Figure getting to know a homicide detective would be more interesting, for a writer.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:58 AM (lutOX)

375
My dream-car, I'm still waiting for. I want a mid-70's mercedes diesel again. had one a few years ago, and loved it.
Fritz, I called him.
Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine


Better Fritz than Brad.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at April 02, 2016 12:58 AM (FkBIv)

376 362---But who doesn't want and need:

Legal counsel
Cash money in-hand
Sympathy-tail
Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 12:48 AM (lutOX)
----------------
LOL.
I guess that's why such obvious blunders are so commonly made!

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 02, 2016 12:58 AM (T/5A0)

377 Yep. Loved it.

Fritz, the diesel death-snail.

A real, live german diesel sedan. no turbo or any of that lame shit....

had 250,000 miles on him when i got him - barely broken in, really. Put 100K miles on it, then sold it for as much as I'd paid for the thing.

I regret that....

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:00 AM (lutOX)

378 I guess that's why such obvious blunders are so commonly made!
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 02, 2016 12:58 AM (T/5A0)
***
yep.

If you do it, it has to be in cold blood, and completely detached.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:01 AM (lutOX)

379 I guess that's why such obvious blunders are so commonly made!
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 02, 2016 12:58 AM (T/5A0)
**
Betcha it's the cash and the tail that gets most caught.

Amateurs....

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:02 AM (lutOX)

380 Have a heart and don't rain on the thrill-kill parade

Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:03 AM (OC+TJ)

381 380 Have a heart and don't rain on the thrill-kill parade
Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:03 AM (OC+TJ)
***
See, a thrill-kill is different. There is no connection between killer and victim. Much harder to investigate, I'd think.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:05 AM (lutOX)

382 Snuff a hobo, and do it right, and there'd be no real investigation, would there? Same with a felon or drug dealer or what-have-you.

But a regular, "normal" person? That would invite attention.

Murder is not so simple as people seem to think.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:09 AM (lutOX)

383 CDR M if you are still around we were on same page, I see about 2 links from your ONT that I had planed for an odd news link Sat. Morning dump. I will leave them as I won't have time to find replacements

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at April 02, 2016 01:10 AM (voOPb)

384 Cold In July

I caught this movie the other day and it was pretty good.


I saw that movie and have to say that I didn't like it one bit. I'm a bit hazy on it but, just when I thought it might be good the plot shifted and it got awful.

At least, that's my recollection of it.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:15 AM (zc3Db)

385
But the problem was her plan was too good - it
showed a level of attention to detail that would not escape notice, and
would, in fact, cause LE to dig and dig and dig.



From what I can tell, most killings are sort of simple, almost
spontaneous affairs; it's when the investigators see signs of
forethought and planning that they really get curious.
Posted by: [Palpatine] at April 01, 2016 11:36 PM (lutOX)


The thing is, I am told, is that your average investigator gets into a sort of investigation-haze. You pull a file, you review the facts, do a couple of interviews, put two and two together, make a reference to a database, write a determination, pull the next file . . . and so on.

You have amazing tools, access to databases, the education and the honed nose and a dedication to being a really nosy bastard, and you are doing stuff that almost be done by a properly crafted macro.

Then, you get something that smells off, you can almost feel the pattern, and you start digging, researching tide-tables and sunrise-sunset times, business registries, property ownerships, prime contractors, restaurant inspection scores.
In short, start flexing your muscles all because otherwise you will be bored and be as boring as the guy who does Sudoko in pencil and erases it when he is done because he wants to let other people have the same amount of fun that he has.

Posted by: Kindltot at April 02, 2016 01:15 AM (aKchR)

Posted by: Kindltot at April 02, 2016 01:15 AM (aKchR)

387 stupid barrel.

Posted by: Kindltot at April 02, 2016 01:16 AM (aKchR)

388 ***

Figure getting to know a homicide detective would be more interesting, for a writer.

Posted by: at April 02, 2016 12:58 AM (lutOX)

Homicide detective opens the writer up to what has occurred, both solved and unsolved. The handbook opens up what is plausible, real or imaginary. Two different perspectives of the same storyline.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 01:18 AM (T78UI)

389 I took a forensics course in college. The prof was a career cop. His final exam "project" was for students to come up with the perfect murder. He said no one ever got a hundred percent.You always take something with you to the scene and you always take something from the scene with you.

Posted by: Wolfish Grin at April 02, 2016 01:18 AM (qPJBi)

390 Betcha it's the cash and the tail that gets most caught.

Amateurs....

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine
****

The life insurance most of the time. At least that is what gets things rolling investigation wise according to the real life forensics shows.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 02, 2016 01:19 AM (hVdx9)

391 In short, start flexing your muscles all because otherwise you will be bored and be as boring as the guy who does Sudoko in pencil and erases it when he is done because he wants to let other people have the same amount of fun that he has.

Posted by: Kindltot at April 02, 2016 01:15 AM (aKchR)
***
Bingo.

The cop does what he does for a living, The killer is a rank amateur, and generally it's his first rodeo.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:20 AM (lutOX)

392 stupid barrel.


Posted by: Kindltot
****

(Pees in barrel and runs off giggling)

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 02, 2016 01:21 AM (hVdx9)

393 I see no reason at all why McDonald's wouldn't replace their cashiers with video kiosks -- initially targeting US states without idiotic minimum-wage laws.



*walks into California Mickey-D's* "Hello, sir -- how can I help you?"




"Where are you, really?" "Iowa, sir -- are you ready to be served, or would you like a minute or two?" "I'm ready for a quarter-pounder deluxe and a large fry -- should come to $8.35." "Indeed it does, sir, please swipe a card or insert cash into the designated slot."

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 01:21 AM (EzgxV)

394 Nite morons
Be well

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at April 02, 2016 01:21 AM (voOPb)

395 The life insurance most of the time. At least that is what gets things rolling investigation wise according to the real life forensics shows.
Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 02, 2016 01:19 AM (hVdx9)
***
Edward G. Robinson's 'little man,' eh?

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:22 AM (lutOX)

396 In the one-liner video, from what movies were the following:

"It's garbage day!" [pulls out pistol and fires]

"Dad's last words were, 'careful, son, that gun's loaded!'"

Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:22 AM (OC+TJ)

397 I took a forensics course in college. The prof was a career cop. His final exam "project" was for students to come up with the perfect murder. He said no one ever got a hundred percent.You always take something with you to the scene and you always take something from the scene with you.

Posted by: Wolfish Grin at April 02, 2016 01:18 AM (qPJBi)


Yeah ... that's what they say, but I find that really hard to believe. Not all murders even have "a scene" that you were at, really.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:22 AM (zc3Db)

398 My idea was CO poisoning induced via a leak in the exhaust/emissions from the victim's car. CO builds up in the bloodstream over time. One long trip on the highway, they just nod off at high speed...bam. He didn't even blink as he rattled off three ways I'd get caught with that one.

Posted by: Wolfish Grin at April 02, 2016 01:23 AM (qPJBi)

399 I took a forensics course in college. The prof was a
career cop. His final exam "project" was for students to come up with
the perfect murder. He said no one ever got a hundred percent.You always
take something with you to the scene and you always take something from
the scene with you.

Posted by: Wolfish Grin at April 02, 2016 01:18 AM (qPJBi)

If nothing else, you always take the memory.
Even if you were not there when you did it.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 01:23 AM (T78UI)

400 I see no reason at all why McDonald's wouldn't replace their cashiers with video kiosks -- initially targeting US states without idiotic minimum-wage laws.

Walmart, and other stores, are already forcing us into "self check out" machines and we don't even get a 2% discount for taking up the job of their cashiers. I kind of hope lots of people steal from them in those lines because the whole thing is pretty obnoxious.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:25 AM (zc3Db)

401 The life insurance most of the time. At least that is what gets things rolling investigation wise according to the real life forensics shows.
Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 02, 2016 01:19 AM (hVdx9)
***
Edward G. Robinson's 'little man,' eh?

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine
****
Bingo. Sometimes it's easy tho.
They take out a policy 6 months or less before the death, or they bump it up big time before they die.
Major red flags.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 02, 2016 01:26 AM (hVdx9)

402 One long trip on the highway, they just nod off at high speed...bam.

The victim would recognize nausea and dizziness each time on short trips

Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:26 AM (OC+TJ)

403 I see no reason at all why McDonald's wouldn't
replace their cashiers with video kiosks -- initially targeting US
states without idiotic minimum-wage laws.




...

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 01:21 AM (EzgxV)

What I miss most about McD's - walking in and seeing what burgers they had under the red light - give me two of those, just put the phucking things in my hand...
Now they pretend to make it to order.
Give me back my AutoMat (~1900).

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 01:27 AM (T78UI)

404 My mother's scheme would have been pretty good, except for the danger to the neighbors.

Her other idea, not so much. She proposed walking up to the house of the intended, knocking on the door, and then throwing a bucket of gasoline on him before striking and throwing a flare.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:27 AM (lutOX)

405 The victim would recognize nausea and dizziness each time on short trips

Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:26 AM (OC+TJ)


You hypnotize him to ignore the symptoms.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:28 AM (zc3Db)

406 400 I see no reason at all why McDonald's wouldn't replace their cashiers with video kiosks -- initially targeting US states without idiotic minimum-wage laws.

Walmart, and other stores, are already forcing us into "self check out" machines and we don't even get a 2% discount for taking up the job of their cashiers. I kind of hope lots of people steal from them in those lines because the whole thing is pretty obnoxious.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:25 AM (zc3Db)



The funny thing is how many shoppers prefer self-checkout to the surly unionized checkers previously shoved down their throat.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 01:28 AM (EzgxV)

407 >The victim would recognize nausea and dizziness each time on short trips

That was one. The other two were indentifiable tool marks where the hole was made and that the vic was more likely to pass out in stop and go traffic and get taken to an ER.

Posted by: Wolfish Grin at April 02, 2016 01:29 AM (qPJBi)

408 Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 02, 2016 01:26 AM (hVdx9)
***
Somebody's got a connection to the business, or has seen "Double Indemnity," or both.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:29 AM (lutOX)

409
Walmart, and other stores, are already forcing us into "self check out" machines

They don't force me. I prefer it.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at April 02, 2016 01:29 AM (FkBIv)

410 402 One long trip on the highway, they just nod off at high speed...bam.

The victim would recognize nausea and dizziness each time on short trips

Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:26 AM (OC+TJ)



Wait -- other people don't have nausea and dizziness on short trips?!?

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 01:30 AM (EzgxV)

411 That's a honey of an anklet, confined-to-home convict

Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:32 AM (OC+TJ)

412 This was in a TX panhandle town with a meat packing plant nearby. Nausea on short trips might be common, when the wind was just right, but the dizziness not so much.

Posted by: Wolfish Grin at April 02, 2016 01:33 AM (qPJBi)

413 The victim would recognize nausea and dizziness each time on short trips
Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:26 AM (OC+TJ)


See, you rig his CD player to repeat Royals, by Lorde and he can't get it out or turn it off.

Posted by: Kindltot at April 02, 2016 01:33 AM (aKchR)

414 404 My mother's scheme would have been pretty good, except for the danger to the neighbors.

Her other idea, not so much. She proposed walking up to the house of the intended, knocking on the door, and then throwing a bucket of gasoline on him before striking and throwing a flare.
Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:27 AM (lutOX)

Wasn't your folks West Virginians? They don't screw around.

Posted by: Hanoverfist at April 02, 2016 01:34 AM (vUuJ6)

415 >See, you rig his CD player to repeat Royals, by Lorde and he can't get it out or turn it off.

Worse than actual murder...

Posted by: Wolfish Grin at April 02, 2016 01:35 AM (qPJBi)

416 Walmart, and other stores, are already forcing us into "self check out" machines...
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:25 AM (zc3Db)
***
Me? it depends on the time of day, my mood, and whether there are any cute girls working the register.

For a cute check-out girl, and the chance to be pleasant and amiable and make her blush, I'll stand in line.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:35 AM (lutOX)

417 Somebody's got a connection to the business, or has seen "Double Indemnity," or both.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine
****

Saw the movie years ago. I also watched a lot of the forensics shows.

Posted by: Tilikum Armored Killer Assault Whale at April 02, 2016 01:36 AM (hVdx9)

418 411 That's a honey of an anklet, confined-to-home convict
Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:32 AM (OC+TJ)
***
Yep.

I wonder if some rum would make this get up on its legs...

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:37 AM (lutOX)

419 411 That's a honey of an anklet, confined-to-home convict
Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:32 AM (OC+TJ)
***
Yepo. Mountaineers, through and through. German/Jewish and Polish/Jewish, but we went native two generations back.

Vicious and clannish to a degree....

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:38 AM (lutOX)

420 Her other idea, not so much. She proposed walking up
to the house of the intended, knocking on the door, and then throwing a
bucket of gasoline on him before striking and throwing a flare.


Now that is the sort of direct thinking that is rare in the world.

Posted by: Kindltot at April 02, 2016 01:39 AM (aKchR)

421 Just checking in on the murder thread. Pretend you never saw me.

Posted by: Orenthal James at April 02, 2016 01:39 AM (mxCgt)

422 Wasn't your folks West Virginians? They don't screw around.
Posted by: Hanoverfist at April 02, 2016 01:34 AM (vUuJ6)
***
pasting error.

Yes, WV.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:39 AM (lutOX)

423
For a cute check-out girl, and the chance to be pleasant and amiable and make her blush, I'll stand in line.
Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine


She'd have to give me money in order for me to willingly stand in line.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at April 02, 2016 01:40 AM (FkBIv)

424 Hey, where all da white wimmenz at?

Posted by: Sheriff Bart at April 02, 2016 01:40 AM (sl+zA)

425 Costochondritis...but Sam's Club may work too

Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:40 AM (OC+TJ)

426 The funny thing is how many shoppers prefer self-checkout to the surly unionized checkers previously shoved down their throat.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 01:28 AM (EzgxV)


The Walmart cashiers around me are nice enough. They just refuse to put enough on.

They don't force me. I prefer it.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at April 02, 2016 01:29 AM (FkBIv)


Okay, but you should still get a small discount for doing the job of cashier, yourself.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:41 AM (zc3Db)

427 400
Walmart, and other stores, are already forcing us into "self check out" machines and we don't even get a 2% discount for taking up the job of their cashiers. I kind of hope lots of people steal from them in those lines because the whole thing is pretty obnoxious.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:25 AM (zc3Db)


I always use the self-checkout line at the supermarket. That way I don't get stuck behind some doofus who wants to carry on a conversation with the cashier while she's checking out, while I'm standing there waiting with my six items and just want to get out of there and go home.

Posted by: rickl at April 02, 2016 01:41 AM (sdi6R)

428
Okay, but you should still get a small discount for doing the job of cashier, yourself.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair


My discount is not having to stand behind others and wait.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at April 02, 2016 01:42 AM (FkBIv)

429 420 Her other idea, not so much. She proposed walking up
to the house of the intended, knocking on the door, and then throwing a
bucket of gasoline on him before striking and throwing a flare.

Now that is the sort of direct thinking that is rare in the world.
Posted by: Kindltot at April 02, 2016 01:39 AM (aKchR)
***
She's always had a fondness, a proclivity, for fire to punish her enemies.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:43 AM (lutOX)

430 eman no like self check-out

eman go to store to shop not to work

plus check-out babe make woody

carry bag in front

Posted by: eman at April 02, 2016 01:44 AM (MQEz6)

431 When you can take the 750l bottle of Valu-Rite through self-check without waiting for some zombie to show up with a key code, I'm all in.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 02, 2016 01:44 AM (sl+zA)

432 She'd have to give me money in order for me to willingly stand in line.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at April 02, 2016 01:40 AM (FkBIv)


At the Walmart I go to the self checkout line can snake around the corners. It's still a shorter wait than the cashier lines, but it gets long. Very long.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:44 AM (zc3Db)

433 I always use the self-checkout line at the supermarket. That way I don't get stuck behind some doofus who wants to carry on a conversation with the cashier while she's checking out, while I'm standing there waiting with my six items and just want to get out of there and go home.

Posted by: rickl at April 02, 2016 01:41 AM (sdi6R)


LOL! Ain't that the truth.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:45 AM (zc3Db)

434 "plus check-out babe make woody

carry bag in front"



Somebody needs to get out more.

Posted by: Chevy Volt at April 02, 2016 01:47 AM (9ym/8)

435 Get away, Chevy Volt!

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 01:47 AM (9ym/8)

436 When you can take the 750l bottle of Valu-Rite through self-check without waiting for some zombie to show up with a key code, I'm all in.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 02, 2016 01:44 AM (sl+zA)


Or glue. Or spray paint. Or any number of items that have me scratching my head.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:47 AM (zc3Db)

437 When you can take the 750l bottle of Valu-Rite
through self-check without waiting for some zombie to show up with a key
code, I'm all in.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 02, 2016 01:44 AM (sl+zA)

That will only require an identification chip to be embedded into the base of your skull.Beta program will be introduced soon.Care to participate?

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 01:49 AM (T78UI)

438 Before I was willowed earlier this evening, I posted that I have been reporting ISIS accounts on twitter. There are hundreds of them. You find one and then just look at their timeline and see the others. Some, probably all, post really violent videos and photos. And by really violent, I mean really really really violent. If you are on twitter, please report this guy:

https://twitter.com/Marry_isnl

Not only are his photos/videos extremely violent, he is threatening the people of Brussels and Germany.

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at April 02, 2016 01:49 AM (iQIUe)

439 G'evening Horde.


So uh... do we just stuff the bodies in the Barrel?

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at April 02, 2016 01:50 AM (1D4Ef)

440 Judging by these twitter accounts, Germany really is going to get hit by ISIS>

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at April 02, 2016 01:51 AM (iQIUe)

441 I always use the self-checkout line at the supermarket. That way I don't get stuck behind some doofus

Man, I don't know. Our doofuses prefer self-checkout.

Posted by: t-bird at April 02, 2016 01:52 AM (Z58Xa)

442 "So uh... do we just stuff the bodies in the Barrel?"


Who's gonna say anything? Just powder generously with lime and keep your trap shut.


I didn't see nuthin'.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 01:52 AM (9ym/8)

443 I prefer a human cashier, and, by me, they're almst always cute young girls.

Two nights ago, I threw a 12 pack of condoms, two bottles of sake, and a tube of KY on the conveyor.

The checkout girl - a very cute tex-mex chica - blushed as she rang me up.

They always ask if you need stamps or ice. Told her I didn't need ice, not yet, and Lord but she went red....

I'm gonna give her my number next week.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:53 AM (lutOX)

444 I'm gonna give her my number next week


------------

As your legal counsel I strongly recommend against this.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 02, 2016 01:55 AM (sl+zA)

445 Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:53 AM (lutOX)

LOL.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 01:56 AM (zc3Db)

446 444 I'm gonna give her my number next week


------------

As your legal counsel I strongly recommend against this.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 02, 2016 01:55 AM (sl+zA)
***
If you ain't Samoan, or from Kerala - the homeland of my counselor - I can't hear you.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:58 AM (lutOX)

447 It's Morphy's Law, a checkout girl is receptive to or initiates flirting at the worst possible times

Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:58 AM (OC+TJ)

448 443 I prefer a human cashier, and, by me, they're almst always cute young girls.

Two nights ago, I threw a 12 pack of condoms, two bottles of sake, and a tube of KY on the conveyor.

The checkout girl - a very cute tex-mex chica - blushed as she rang me up.

They always ask if you need stamps or ice. Told her I didn't need ice, not yet, and Lord but she went red....

I'm gonna give her my number next week.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:53 AM (lutOX)



Make sure to encourage her to use stamps.

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 02:01 AM (EzgxV)

449 "As your legal counsel I strongly recommend against this."


I'm curious as to your advise. What legal problems do "propositioning" produce as a defendant?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 02:01 AM (9ym/8)

450 447 It's Morphy's Law, a checkout girl is receptive to or initiates flirting at the worst possible times
Posted by: derit at April 02, 2016 01:58 AM (OC+TJ)
***
I disgaree.

It's always best to build up the

antici










pation.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 02:01 AM (lutOX)

451 The checkout girl - a very cute tex-mex chica - blushed as she rang me up.



They always ask if you need stamps or ice. Told her I didn't need ice, not yet, and Lord but she went red....



I'm gonna give her my number next week.

Posted by: at April 02, 2016 01:53 AM (lutOX)


Suggest you buy your cucumbers, binder twine, and bicycle pump elsewhere.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:01 AM (T78UI)

452 Make sure to encourage her to use stamps.
Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 02:01 AM (EzgxV)
***
You're a sick, sick man.

I salute you, sir.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 02:02 AM (lutOX)

453
#IslamicState Releases INFOGRAHIC Shows Total Of 112 Suicide Attacks In March 2016 In #Iraq & #Syria.

===========

So, they found 112 suckers to kill themselves. Most of these appear to be in Iraq. Wonder if every suicide bomber is a volunteer.

https://goo.gl/RxGgVI

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at April 02, 2016 02:04 AM (iQIUe)

454 See, I'm far too clueless to pick up that sort of thing in real time.

There was this time I gave a speech at a Toastmaster contest, and the MC was a high school daughter of the hosting club.

She's interviewing each of the speakers, but when she got to me, she started giggling and stumbling over her interview questions.

At the time, I thought, "sheesh, you were doing fine interviewing the previous contestants!".


*woosh*

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at April 02, 2016 02:04 AM (1D4Ef)

455 Suggest you buy your cucumbers, binder twine, and bicycle pump elsewhere.
Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:01 AM (T78UI)
***
That's what Walmart is for.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 02:05 AM (lutOX)

456 443 I prefer a human cashier, and, by me, they're almst always cute young girls.
Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 01:53 AM (lutOX)


Yeah, there are some cute girls at my supermarket. Meh.

Two problems with that:

1. They're almost certainly Obama and/or Sanders voters.
2. They wouldn't piss on me if I was on fire.

So, meh. I'll use the self-checkout and see my own way out.

Posted by: rickl at April 02, 2016 02:07 AM (sdi6R)

457 "At the time, I thought, "sheesh, you were doing fine interviewing the previous contestants!".


*woosh*"


Ya gotta get over yourself.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 02:07 AM (9ym/8)

458 At the time, I thought, "sheesh, you were doing fine interviewing the previous contestants!".


*woosh*
Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at April 02, 2016 02:04 AM (1D4Ef)
***
Yep.

right over your head, it went.

Explains the bald patch, doesn't it?

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 02:08 AM (lutOX)

459 I just spent 2 minutes watching NASA's tribble cam.

I am an idiot.

Posted by: Kindltot at April 02, 2016 02:08 AM (aKchR)

460 That's what Walmart is for.

Posted by: at April 02, 2016 02:05 AM (lutOX)

Oh, not at Walmart. Good.
They always give a stink-eye when swinging by to pick up another wheel barrow, blue plastic tarp, duct tape, shotgun shells, chain saw, lime, fifth of cheap whiskey, rope, what ever late night pick ups.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:09 AM (T78UI)

461 Two problems with that:

1. They're almost certainly Obama and/or Sanders voters.
2. They wouldn't piss on me if I was on fire.

So, meh. I'll use the self-checkout and see my own way out.
Posted by: rickl at April 02, 2016 02:07 AM (sdi6R)
***
The former, nothing can be done about, not should it bother you. The latter - you under-estimate the appeal of a confident older man.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 02:10 AM (lutOX)

462 "2. They wouldn't piss on me if I was on fire. "

Word. You ain't gonna get a ripe young tart if you're 40 and don't have money.

Nature. Fight against all you want.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 02:10 AM (9ym/8)

463 ..."They always give a stink-eye when swinging by to pick up another wheel barrow, blue plastic tarp, duct tape, shotgun shells, chain saw, lime, fifth of cheap whiskey, rope, what ever late night pick ups."
-Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:09 AM (T78UI)

What do they have against "Thursdays"?

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at April 02, 2016 02:12 AM (OQ9R7)

464 She's interviewing each of the speakers, but when
she got to me, she started giggling and stumbling over her interview
questions.



At the time, I thought, "sheesh, you were doing fine interviewing the previous contestants!".





*woosh*

Posted by: at April 02, 2016 02:04 AM (1D4Ef)

Your socks did not match, that or your moose knuckles where busting out.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:12 AM (T78UI)

465 "you under-estimate the appeal of a confident older man."


Who drives a '97 Corolla?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 02:12 AM (9ym/8)

466
Oh, not at Walmart. Good.
They always give a stink-eye when swinging by to pick up another wheel barrow, blue plastic tarp, duct tape, shotgun shells, chain saw, lime, fifth of cheap whiskey, rope, what ever late night pick ups.
Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:09 AM (T78UI)
***
just smile and make the clerk 'squirmy,' and all's well.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 02:12 AM (lutOX)

467 459 I just spent 2 minutes watching NASA's tribble cam.

I am an idiot.
Posted by: Kindltot at April 02, 2016 02:08 AM (aKchR)


Where's that? I got 2 minutes to waste.

Posted by: rickl at April 02, 2016 02:14 AM (sdi6R)

468 465 "you under-estimate the appeal of a confident older man."


Who drives a '97 Corolla?
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 02:12 AM (9ym/
***
you;d damn sure better be confident if that's your ride.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 02:15 AM (lutOX)

469 The former, nothing can be done about, not should it bother you. The latter - you under-estimate the appeal of a confident older man.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 02:10 AM (lutOX)


Or the appeal by some for "golden showers"...

Posted by: The [REDACTED] Hat at April 02, 2016 02:16 AM (vBeA5)

470 "you;d damn sure better be confident if that's your ride."


He.

Hehe.


Hehehehe.


Good answer, muchacho.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 02:17 AM (9ym/8)

471 463 ..."They always give a stink-eye when swinging by to pick up another wheel barrow, blue plastic tarp, duct tape, shotgun shells, chain saw, lime, fifth of cheap whiskey, rope, what ever late night pick ups."
-Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:09 AM (T78UI)

What do they have against "Thursdays"?

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at April 02, 2016 02:12 AM (OQ9R7)



Hey, Slap -- I'd been wondering where you were keeping yourself...

Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 02:18 AM (EzgxV)

472 Good answer, muchacho.
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 02:17 AM (9ym/
***
It;s worked so far.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at April 02, 2016 02:19 AM (lutOX)

473 So are the good or the crappy headlights the ones that blind me at night? Worst are the bright white jobs on newer cars.
Stoopid cataracts.

Posted by: Headless Body of Agnew at April 02, 2016 02:20 AM (FtrY1)

474 "Hey, Slap -- I'd been wondering where you were keeping yourself..."
-Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 02:18 AM (EzgxV)

Combination of unintentionally busy and intentionally staying away.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at April 02, 2016 02:21 AM (OQ9R7)

475 I had a '91 Corolla wagon for 15 years. That I bought used. I finally had to give it up when it was rusted all to hell. The engine was good for another 100,000 miles, I'm sure.

Loved that car. It wasn't a chick magnet, though.

Posted by: rickl at April 02, 2016 02:23 AM (sdi6R)

476 ...plus I've been preparing for my fantasy baseball draft tomorrow. Lots of stats to go over and strategy to game-plan.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at April 02, 2016 02:23 AM (OQ9R7)

477 " ...plus I've been preparing for my fantasy baseball draft tomorrow. "


That's how I knew you were.........

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 02:26 AM (9ym/8)

478 "Hey, Slap -- I'd been wondering where you were keeping yourself..."

-Posted by: cthulhu at April 02, 2016 02:18 AM (EzgxV)



Combination of unintentionally busy and intentionally staying away.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at April 02, 2016 02:21 AM (OQ9R7)

Would it not hurt if Ace does a daily two-hour hate every day at five...Let everybody work out the bile and address the other later post topics with a bit more levity...At the risk of total ban-nation, I may suggest it.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:28 AM (T78UI)

479 "That's how I knew you were........."
-Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 02:26 AM (9ym/

...A winner? Yup. That's a vote of confidence, coming from you, ol' pal!

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at April 02, 2016 02:28 AM (OQ9R7)

480 I've become convinced of Intelligent Design!
I'm sure that it's a fact and not a rumor.
Nose-hair is the proof, Inarguable Sign:
Intelligent, with Moron sense of humor.


____________
Weary Blues - Madeleine Peyroux
https://youtu.be/4w5i2WPTd2w

Ta!

Posted by: mindless wharrgarblr at April 02, 2016 02:31 AM (LtSaI)

481 "A winner? Yup. That's a vote of confidence, coming from you, ol' pal!"


Exactly. I would not question your baseball skills.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 02:32 AM (9ym/8)

482 ..."At the risk of total ban-nation, I may suggest it."
-Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:28 AM (T78UI)

I would have been banned a thousand-times over, had I in-artfully added to certain conversations. I have skipped-over reading some threads to avoid the punching of walls and pigeonholing of some members.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at April 02, 2016 02:34 AM (OQ9R7)

483 So, uh, 1:35 AM CST, so I'll just mosey on off now.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 02, 2016 02:35 AM (9ym/8)

484 G'Night, Ricardo.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at April 02, 2016 02:37 AM (OQ9R7)

485 What do they have against "Thursdays"?

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at April 02, 2016 02:12 AM (OQ9R7)


Lack of þe letter Þ?

Posted by: Þe Political Hat at April 02, 2016 02:37 AM (vBeA5)

486 I took a forensics course in college. The prof was a career cop. His final exam "project" was for students to come up with the perfect murder. He said no one ever got a hundred percent.You always take something with you to the scene and you always take something from the scene with you.

Posted by: Wolfish Grin


I've thought about this, and here is my scenario for a perfect murder:

First, put on a weird hat and some kind of absurd disguise, and go to a public library at least 50 miles from your house. Wear gloves. At this library, use their public computers and go on Craigslist and search for someone selling a cheap-ass obsolete laptop computer. Create a throwaway email address on the library's computer, and contact the seller, and make an appointment to go buy it.

Further altering your disguise, go meet the guy, and pay with cash (bills you have only ever handled with gloves). Needless to say, use a fake name. I recommend "Pat."

Phew! First step complete -- now you own a computer that cannot be traced to you.

Never again visit that library or use that throwaway email address. Ever.

Next, scout out (in some town that's not your hometown) cafes that have a free and strong wifi signal -- independent cafes only. Using this stranger's computer which you now own, DON'T actually go into the cafe but find some nearby location not visible by eye (or surveillance camera) from the cafe, but is still within its wifi cloud. Best would be somewhere "behind" the cafe's back wall, so you're not even in the same social space. Sneaky.

Log on to the wifi signal. Boom -- now you're on the internet through a signal that cannot be associated with you using a computer that cannot be traced to you.

Once online, go BACK to craigslist and this time search for used drones for sale. Find biggest bestest drone with the longest range, pilotable by the drone's on-board camera, purchased by the original owner way prior to the new Fed "drone registration" requirement.

Different disguise this time, again with gloved cash and fake name, go buy it.

For the rest of the steps, only ever touch the drone with gloves, in a "clean room" with minimized dust and particles.

Wipe all pre-existing fingerprints off the drone, thoroughly. Gouge out, very very deeply, any registration numbers or other identifying info.

Again in disguise, go to some farm supply store (or wherever) and buy some castor beans with cash -- a very modest amount of beans, no more than you need.

Then process the castor beans into ricin using instructions you find in a physical paper book at a distant library -- a book that you look at in the stacks and never actually check out. Needless to say, never look up ricin recipes on your computer, even your untraceable computer.

Then using a hypodermic needle inject the ricin into a small lightbulb that has thin delicate glass. Seal the small hole carefully.

Attach the ricin-bulb to the servo mechanism of the drone in such a way that if the camera is tilted in a certain direction, it will crush the bulb (and release the ricin, obviously). Test the technique on normal bulbs until you get it perfect.

Also: remove any memory chip from the drone which could record what it "sees" with its on-board camera.

Then scope out your victim, whoever it may be -- someone unknown to you is best, such as a celebrity, a random stranger, a politician, or whatever -- and when you learn ahead of time that they will definitely be in a specific outdoor urban location at a specific time, you scout out the situation ahead of time and position yourself way way out of any direct line of sight of the victim's upcoming location, and also unseen by passersby. Inside a room (with a window through which the drone could launch) would be best.

When the moment arrives, you pilot your drone via the onboard camera (beaming its image to your remote control's screen, as the high-end drones do), and (as you've surely guessed by now) fly the drone directly at your victim, and in the final moments rotate the servo mechanism to break the bulb as close as possible to your victim (bumping into him with the drone is OK too).

Ricin releases, victim dies, murder accomplished.

If the drone is still undamaged, uncaptured and functioning, you then continue to fly it further and further directly away from your actual location and land it or crash it into the most oddball location possible (which you also had previously scoped out) -- best spots would be where teenage nogoodniks hang about (skate parks, high schools, etc.), because they will most definitely "steal" any wayward drone that landed amongst them, and never turn it over to the cops.

Or into a lake. Or onto a highway where it would get run over. Etc.

But that's not even necessary -- because the drone is untraceable to you anyway, due to all the steps outlined above. Even if the drone falls into the hands of law enforcement, it wouldn't do them any good.

After the drone has finally stopped flying, you casually put the piloting remote control console in your backpack, walk the opposite direction from the incident (which you should be at least a half mile distant from anyway), and later utterly destroy the controller in an incinerator or other melt-into-slag scenario. Remove the computer's hard drive and chips, pulverize them personally with a sledgehammer in the wilderness, then smash up the computer too, take all the aforementioned parts, melt the whole thing in the same incinerator, then collect the slag of the remote control, computer and hard drive, go on a whale-watching trip, and throw the slag overboard in the deepest part of the ocean on the trip. Marvel at the whales, so you don't seem suspicious.

Never brag about the crime or mention it to anyone. Ever.

OK, Sherlocks: Where is the flaw in this plan? Why would I not earn a 100% score on that forensics final?

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 02:39 AM (jBuUi)

487 If Texas just tied voting rights to doing something productive they'd be fine. Men with businesses move and drag along the liberal wifey who votes for the socialist crap to ease her vague feelings of guilt for having such an easy life. No offense to ettes who are home schooling or whatever, I'm talking soely about the liberal guilt twits who feel badly that they have it easier than some folks but instead of donating time or money to improve things for folks they feel badly for they just vote for the socialist who says they'll tax the rich to help the needy.

Posted by: PaleRider at April 02, 2016 02:42 AM (3kUGE)

488 I would have been banned a thousand-times over, had I
in-artfully added to certain conversations. I have skipped-over
reading some threads to avoid the punching of walls and pigeonholing of
some members.

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at April 02, 2016 02:34 AM (OQ9R7)

Punching walls is a great stress reliever if you don't mind busted knuckles and fixing walls. I have tired of it myself.
Pro or con, it isn't worth spending an hour to fact check (and, key, reference) a comment that maybe twenty people may read.
Generally I skip any post that has 'T' or 'C' in the headline.The rest is good as it ever was.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:48 AM (T78UI)

489 Okay... eyes are bleary from reading stats and screens. Must hit the ol' hay, Ladies and Gentlemen.

G'Night, Ev'ry-Buddy!

*static*

Posted by: Slapweasel, (Cold1), (T) at April 02, 2016 02:49 AM (OQ9R7)

490 Phew! First step complete -- now you own a computer that cannot be traced to you.

Never again visit that library or use that throwaway email address. Ever.


I read that far and knew without a doubt that it was zombie.

Posted by: rickl at April 02, 2016 02:50 AM (sdi6R)

491 I am going to ASSuME Test the technique on normal bulbs until you get it perfect.

One of the ways they find bomb makers is looking for people coming into the ER with unusual burns & missing digits.

Somewhere there is a lot of broken glass & while the drone may be gone the broken glass was not by the victim is not...

Posted by: Adriane the DIY Critic ... at April 02, 2016 02:53 AM (AoK0a)

492 OK, Sherlocks: Where is the flaw in this plan? Why would I not earn a 100% score on that forensics final?

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 02:39 AM (jBuUi)

Or you could just go to a low working class bar for a while and bad mouth your idiot boss with all his money waving and gold rings and s/he lives here... and let nature take its course.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:53 AM (T78UI)

493 zombie, are you driving your own car to buy the goods (laptop, drone)? If not, are you walking past surveillance cameras, ATMs etc? Did anyone see you on practice runs? If so, disguise has to be really believable. How did you determine the specific outdoor location of the victim, was it just in the papers or did you search it anonymously somehow? Also, in case they find the room you piloted the drone from, you will want to lose the clothes you were wearing and the shoes (carpet fibers).

Posted by: Wolfish Grin at April 02, 2016 02:54 AM (qPJBi)

494 If Texas just tied voting rights to doing something productive they'd be fine.

Posted by: PaleRider at April 02, 2016 02:42 AM (3kUGE)


They's loose Congressional representation per the 14th Amendment...

Posted by: The Hat of Amendment at April 02, 2016 02:55 AM (vBeA5)

495 One of the ways they find bomb makers is looking for people coming into the ER with unusual burns missing digits.



...
Posted by: Adriane the DIY Critic ... at April 02, 2016 02:53 AM (AoK0a)

Amateurs.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at April 02, 2016 02:57 AM (T78UI)

496 Great Podcast this week guys!

You had me laughing out loud on a bunch of occasions.

Truly enjoyed all 2 & 1/2 hours.....listened to it twice actually.

Thanks for taking the time.

Posted by: Alec j at April 02, 2016 02:58 AM (fq7l4)

497 486
OK, Sherlocks: Where is the flaw in this plan? Why would I not earn a 100% score on that forensics final?
Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 02:39 AM (jBuUi)


Don't you have to actually inject ricin into the victim, rather than just spray him with it?

Posted by: rickl at April 02, 2016 02:58 AM (sdi6R)

498 I like self checkout.

One time I was waiting in line for a woman to find her CHECKBOOK(who the hell uses checks anymore?), and I'm sure the look on my face gave away my disgust, so a woman in line says, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" And I said, "Not unless you're thinking I need a blow job right about now!"
You have to know your audience. Everyone around me was a woman, so I immediately knew what I said wasn't going to be taken a a humorous retort. It got the line moving again!

Posted by: Hadoop at April 02, 2016 02:58 AM (2X7pN)

499 It's too late to get willowed, right?

Posted by: Hadoop at April 02, 2016 03:00 AM (2X7pN)

500 Wasted one of my best stories.

Posted by: Hadoop at April 02, 2016 03:01 AM (2X7pN)

501 Don't you have to actually inject ricin into the victim, rather than just spray him with it?
Posted by: rickl


Nope -- it can be inhaled too, with deadly results.

A minor refinement of the plan would be to devise some way to make a very small "explosion" when the bulb breaks, to aerosolize the ricin.

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 03:04 AM (jBuUi)

502 Somewhere there is a lot of broken glass & while the drone may be gone the broken glass was not by the victim is not...
Posted by: Adriane the DIY Critic


All glass from the bulb experiments would be punctiliously swept up and disposed of, obviously. Better yet, conduct the experiments in the woods.

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 03:05 AM (jBuUi)

503 I read that far and knew without a doubt that it was zombie.
Posted by: rickl


I thought the giveaway was that the plan involved whale-watching, juvenile delinquent skateboarders, farm supply stores, incinerators, and "a weird hat."

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 03:08 AM (jBuUi)

504 They'd lose Congressional representation per the 14th Amendment...

Posted by: The Hat of Amendment at April 02, 2016 02:55 AM (vBeA5)


Actually, the 26th is supposed to take away even that choice for the states ... but I really can't make heads or tails of the 26th:

Section 1.

The right of citizens of the United States, who are eighteen years of age or older, to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of age.


This amendment was written by a retard.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 03:09 AM (zc3Db)

505 Posted by: Hadoop at April 02, 2016 02:58 AM (2X7pN)

That was even funnier than Palpatine's!

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 03:10 AM (zc3Db)

506 493 zombie, are you driving your own car to buy the goods (laptop, drone)? If not, are you walking past surveillance cameras, ATMs etc? Did anyone see you on practice runs? If so, disguise has to be really believable. How did you determine the specific outdoor location of the victim, was it just in the papers or did you search it anonymously somehow? Also, in case they find the room you piloted the drone from, you will want to lose the clothes you were wearing and the shoes (carpet fibers).
Posted by: Wolfish Grin


All goods purchased in disguise. Never drive one's own car on purchases. Practice runs done in the deep woods. Victim's location publicized widely ("Celebrity X will appear at the ribbon-cutting ceremony!" etc.). All clothes worn during the entire process, beginning to end, burnt to ash, ashes scattered hither and thither.

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 03:12 AM (jBuUi)

507 Don't you have to actually inject ricin into the victim, rather than just spray him with it?
Posted by: rickl

Nope -- it can be inhaled too, with deadly results.

A minor refinement of the plan would be to devise some way to make a very small "explosion" when the bulb breaks, to aerosolize the ricin.

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 03:04 AM (jBuUi)


DMSO is your friend...

Posted by: The Chemical Hat at April 02, 2016 03:14 AM (vBeA5)

508 All goods purchased in disguise. Never drive one's own car on purchases. Practice runs done in the deep woods. Victim's location publicized widely ("Celebrity X will appear at the ribbon-cutting ceremony!" etc.). All clothes worn during the entire process, beginning to end, burnt to ash, ashes scattered hither and thither.
Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 03:12 AM (jBuUi)


Best advice: Do it over a term of decades.

Posted by: The Temporal Hat at April 02, 2016 03:15 AM (vBeA5)

509 All goods purchased in disguise.

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 03:12 AM (jBuUi)


From Four Lions:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqJJfBeuxUE

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 03:15 AM (zc3Db)

510 The downside of my plan is now that some lunatic will read my comment and use that very scheme to murder someone, and the cops will subpoena Ace, who will be forced to give up my IP, and I'll end up being convicted of a crime I didn't even commit -- simply because I described it in such precise detail ahead of time!

Sigh.

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 03:16 AM (jBuUi)

511 simply because I described it in such precise detail ahead of time!

Sigh.

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 03:16 AM (jBuUi)


Should have claimed to be by your nick "Boaty McBoatface"....

Posted by: Boaty McBoatface at April 02, 2016 03:18 AM (vBeA5)

512 DMSO is your friend...

Posted by: The Chemical Hat at April 02, 2016 03:14 AM (vBeA5)


I remember when all the athletes were going crazy over that to take drugs in through their skin. Back in the 70s, I think. I remember something about it leaving a fish taste in your mouth.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 03:19 AM (zc3Db)

513 From Four Lions:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqJJfBeuxUE
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair


That movie was WAY funnier than I expected it to be.

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 03:20 AM (jBuUi)

514 They'd lose Congressional representation per the 14th Amendment...

Posted by: The Hat of Amendment at April 02, 2016 02:55 AM (vBeA5)


I've been thinking about it and I guess I was wrong in my comment to you. Losing a little representation in the House is a small price to pay to preserve a state's character and possibly save it from oblivion.

And I don't see how the 26th changes anything about the 14th's application only to male voters in this assessment of House representation.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 03:23 AM (zc3Db)

515 DMSO is your friend...

Posted by: The Chemical Hat at April 02, 2016 03:14 AM (vBeA5)

I remember when all the athletes were going crazy over that to take drugs in through their skin. Back in the 70s, I think. I remember something about it leaving a fish taste in your mouth.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 03:19 AM (zc3Db)


DMSO in and of itself is relatively innocuous. The thing is that anything dissolved in it will be taken fully and totally into your bloodstream. It is the equivalent of a direct needle injection.

Posted by: The Di-Methoxy Hat at April 02, 2016 03:24 AM (vBeA5)

516 That movie was WAY funnier than I expected it to be.

Posted by: zombie at April 02, 2016 03:20 AM (jBuUi)


It's one of my all-time favorites. And the movie is amazing in that it doesn't water anything down towards the end, even as it's getting funnier and funnier. It is totally raw and totally hysterical.

It took me a couple of viewings to catch all the actual dialogue. I even saw one version where they subtitled it in English! I must have watched it five times before I could really hear that Waj was saying "rubber dinghy rapids", though I knew that it was something along those lines, anyway.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 03:27 AM (zc3Db)

517 I've been thinking about it and I guess I was wrong in my comment to you. Losing a little representation in the House is a small price to pay to preserve a state's character and possibly save it from oblivion.

And I don't see how the 26th changes anything about the 14th's application only to male voters in this assessment of House representation.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 03:23 AM (zc3Db)


Frankly, I think SCOTUS was wrong to deny the state's the right to have their upper house constituated differently from their lower house, specifically when it came to distribution of state Senate seats by county.

If that were still allowed, than California, if it followed its last "Federal Plan" for its state Senate, would have a GOP majority. In Nevada, the Libertarians and Independent American Party would have more state Senators than the Democrats.

Posted by: The Federal Plan Hat at April 02, 2016 03:27 AM (vBeA5)

518 It made me laugh when I read about tradecraft for physical disguises and one of them was about making a bum leg so you wouldn't fuck up while on camera. Everything has to be consistent, so the advice was to bind up a leg to limit mobility and put a small object in your shoe.

With the abundance of cctv cameras out there, you can't be seen changing your walk. Keep your head down. Wear oversize glasses.


Or be a homeless person, they're invisible.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at April 02, 2016 03:31 AM (kKHcp)

519 There are a surprising variety of covers of "Can You Please Crawl Out Your Window?" on YouTube.

Just saying.

Posted by: rickl at April 02, 2016 03:39 AM (sdi6R)

520 The question of "the perfect murder" can't be that difficult. The median rate of unsolved murders among the states is north of 20% with the highest murder rate states boasting unsolved murder rates much higher than that. And those are murders done by people who often don't care about planning them out in any way.

Shit, the SEIU thug bit that Town Haller's finger off and was caught on camera ... but they could never seem to find him ...

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 03:51 AM (zc3Db)

521 Frankly, I think SCOTUS was wrong to deny the state's the right to have their upper house constituated differently from their lower house, specifically when it came to distribution of state Senate seats by county.

Posted by: The Federal Plan Hat at April 02, 2016 03:27 AM (vBeA5)


Which decision is that, because that sounds totally insane - though nothing out of the SCOTUS really surprises me. All the feral government is charged with is insuring a Republican form of government for the states (which the feral government actively worked AGAINST when Barky supported the Wisconsin flea-baggers).

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 03:55 AM (zc3Db)

522 I don't think there is such a thing as a perfect murder.
The closer the person is to you, the tougher it is to get away with it.
The more motive you have, the tougher it is to get away with it.
The more you hate the person, the tougher it is to get away with it.

There's a reason serial killers are so tough to find, and that is because it is cold blooded sport, and seemingly random for quite a while.

The rest is luck, or bad luck.

My advice would be Don't Do It. Stay healthy long enough to piss on their grave.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at April 02, 2016 04:00 AM (kKHcp)

523 Which decision is that, because that sounds totally insane - though nothing out of the SCOTUS really surprises me. All the feral government is charged with is insuring a Republican form of government for the states (which the feral government actively worked AGAINST when Barky supported the Wisconsin flea-baggers).

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 03:55 AM (zc3Db)


Reynolds v. Sims

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reynolds_v._Sims

Wesberry v. Sanders

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wesberry_v._Sanders

The entire of having a bicameral legislature is to have one House constituated differntly than the other!

Posted by: The Bicameral Hat at April 02, 2016 04:03 AM (vBeA5)

524 Good news:

Kurdish Muslims abandoning Islam for Zoroastrianism in Disgust at ISIS/ Daesh

http://tinyurl.com/z79onsg

Posted by: The Political Hat at April 02, 2016 04:05 AM (vBeA5)

525 Oy ...

Good Night all.

Serious yard work in the morning ...

Posted by: Adriane the DIY Critic ... at April 02, 2016 04:06 AM (AoK0a)

526 Reynolds v. Sims

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reynolds_v._Sims

Posted by: The Bicameral Hat at April 02, 2016 04:03 AM (vBeA5)


Wow. Just .... fucking ... wow.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 02, 2016 04:08 AM (zc3Db)

527 The entire of having a bicameral legislature is to have one House constituated differntly than the other!
Posted by: The Bicameral Hat at April 02, 2016 04:03 AM (vBeA5)


But on the other hand, you gotta keep in mind what a guy in a black robe feels is fair.

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at April 02, 2016 04:08 AM (1D4Ef)

528 /sigh

Maybe someone'll clean up the troll droppings on the morrow.

Posted by: ReactionaryMonster Bravely supporting kittens at April 02, 2016 04:09 AM (1D4Ef)

529 528 Oy ...

Good Night all.

Serious yard work in the morning ...
Posted by: Adriane the DIY Critic ... at April 02, 2016 04:06 AM (AoK0a)


I'm trying to forget about that.

I saw the first spider of the year tonight.

Winter can't come soon enough.

Posted by: rickl at April 02, 2016 04:11 AM (sdi6R)

530 Posted by: Testy Stoic Trumpublican at April 02, 2016 04:15 AM (AhiRu)

Just because it is late doesn't mean you can skip around the ONT ban on primary politics.

Posted by: The Political Hat at April 02, 2016 04:16 AM (vBeA5)

531 Good Morning all



"Just because it is late doesn't mean you can skip around the ONT ban on primary politics."

As far as I know, that is Maet's ban. Don't think CDR M has the same policy in place. Maybe someone could ask him?

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. What evs at April 02, 2016 04:25 AM (WVsWD)

532 As far as I know, that is Maet's ban. Don't think CDR M has the same policy in place. Maybe someone could ask him?

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. What evs at April 02, 2016 04:25 AM (WVsWD)


Why can't we just share a hobo-hunting Val-U-Rite infused night of [CENSORED]?

Posted by: The Political Hat, hoping... at April 02, 2016 04:28 AM (vBeA5)

533 "Why can't we just share a hobo-hunting Val-U-Rite infused night of [CENSORED]?"

I has a sadz. I'm diabetic. I have to watch my booze consumption closely. My booze stash consists of one Bottle of Hard Root Beer. That will take me a few days to consume but for you drink away.

I wonder if there is a Valurite brand of Root Beer Schnapps?

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. What evs at April 02, 2016 04:33 AM (WVsWD)

534 Interesting. Starting price for SW VII digital is only $17.95.

Why so low?

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. What evs at April 02, 2016 04:35 AM (WVsWD)

535 Tempted. I am.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Who's up for a trip to Dagobah? at April 02, 2016 04:35 AM (WVsWD)

536 Night all.

Here is a cover of Pink Floyd's Syd Barrett era "Lucifer Sam" by The Well:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qdk5IlmfX8U

Posted by: The Political Hat at April 02, 2016 04:39 AM (vBeA5)

537 Also, bonus The Well:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QuTqV2U7Fto

Posted by: The Political Hat at April 02, 2016 04:41 AM (vBeA5)

538 It's legal to kill your kid, isn't it? Please tell me that it is.

Gingy, Litle and I have been on vacation for the past three days. Big stayed at our house and watched the dog. Gingy, Little and I got less sleep than usual in hotel beds. We got home tonight at 6, exhausted. I had to run out and meet with a client, and then I was home. While I was out working, Gingy took all of Big's stuff to his house. Big texted me and asked me if his pills were taken to his house (Big has issues, but we've finally got a handle on them and his medication is key. He's finally working enough to support himself, and I CANT BEGIN TO EXPRESS HOW HAPPY AND PROUD OF HIM I AM(seriously)). I looked and they weren't, so I told him so. Big was at his job, working until 3AM. "Do you want to come here to spend the night, or go to your house?" "I want to go to my house, I miss my pets". "Do you need your pills tonight, or can we get them to you in the morning?" "I need them tonight".

OK, I say, I'll put them in the mailbox, come by and get them on the way home. Then I, desperately weary me, doze downstairs, inside but close to the mailbox, just to make sure he's got what he needs, because he's told me he HAS to take his pill. I'd like to be in bed, I'm really tired.

So just a few minutes ago I get a text-"I can't find the pills". Turns out he went home and looked in HIS mailbox for the pills. When I tell him they are in MY mailbox, he says, and I quote, "Minor miscommunication then, I'll get them tomorrow. I always keep a weeks worth stashed in my desk"

So now I'm sitting here with sandy eyelids, angrily awake because I dozed earlier and now I can't sleep, contemplating filicide. No jury would convict me, right?

Posted by: Weirddave at April 02, 2016 04:53 AM (N8hFs)

539 "No jury would convict me, right?"

Are you dependent on any meds to keep you normal? I am. I am insulin dependent and I always have a months supply extra. That doesn't mean I want to use it when I have more available.

Sorry, I'm siding with Big and would send you to chair.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Who's up for a trip to Dagobah? at April 02, 2016 04:59 AM (WVsWD)

540 Good morning horde
Bahrain Grand Prix qualifying later on today, they didn't change it from the disaster that happened in Australia so hopefully it will be a repeat and then they will change it.

Posted by: Skip at April 02, 2016 05:41 AM (1J6E6)

541 It's a pretty safe bet that in today's pc climate, if you kill a thug to protect yourself/family/home you will have to deal with unpleasant aftermath. Not talking about legal hassle or clean-up. Talking about thug 'culture' and the left's butthurt.

Posted by: Eromero at April 02, 2016 05:48 AM (zLDYs)

542 Global warming: it's only unseasonably cold where you are, wherever you happen to be. But everywhere else it's much, MUCH hotter. The hottest month ever recorded. It's bleaching the coral reefs and killing birds. Trust us.

I feel like I'm being followed around by the Jon Lovitz pathological liar character, and he doesn't realize I'm onto him, and he keeps talking and talking. I'm going to lose it someday.

Posted by: angela urkel at April 02, 2016 05:51 AM (vhTN7)

543 How much faith does anyone put into anecdotal evidence? For example, people who say they are going to something, intending to just get along with the crowd, and then do the exact opposite?

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Who's up for a trip to Dagobah? at April 02, 2016 05:54 AM (WVsWD)

544 Are you dependent on any meds to keep you normal? I am. I am insulin
dependent and I always have a months supply extra. That doesn't mean I
want to use it when I have more available.



Sorry, I'm siding with Big and would send you to chair.


Point was "Oh, I have meds in my desk, nevermind". That's what I wanted to kill him for

Posted by: Weirddave at April 02, 2016 05:56 AM (N8hFs)

545 "Point was "Oh, I have meds in my desk, nevermind". That's what I wanted to kill him for"

I'm still siding with Big on this. Especially if it is a med that modifies behavior. When you are not thinking right, your memory suffers.

I will however lighten your sentence to time served and having to read every single comment at The Blaze for the next two weeks.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Who's up for a trip to Dagobah? at April 02, 2016 06:01 AM (WVsWD)

546 545 "Point was "Oh, I have meds in my desk, nevermind". That's what I wanted to kill him for"

I'm still siding with Big on this. Especially if it is a med that modifies behavior. When you are not thinking right, your memory suffers.

I will however lighten your sentence to time served and having to read every single comment at The Blaze for the next two weeks.
Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Who's up for a trip to Dagobah? at April 02, 2016 06:01 AM (WVsWD)


The Blaze!?


Oh The Huge Manatee!

Posted by: Bitter Jamie Farr at April 02, 2016 06:03 AM (qYDgA)

547 Talk about cruel and inhumane.

Posted by: Hanoverfist at April 02, 2016 06:24 AM (vUuJ6)

548 [no classified stuff]

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at April 02, 2016 06:49 AM (vhTN7)

549 The CornHub porn parody was not at all what I expected. It was actually funny, and almost made me wonder if I've been judging men too harshly.

Almost.

Posted by: Spellcheck at April 02, 2016 04:23 PM (HKBpI)

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