Overnight Open Thread (11-23-2015)

Quote of the Day I

Why is the goose-step not used in England? There are, heaven knows, plenty of army officers who would be only too glad to introduce some such thing. It is not used because the people in the street would laugh. Beyond a certain point, military display is only possible in countries where the common people dare not laugh at the army.

-- George Orwell, 1941

Quote of the Day II

An important lesson, worth remembering amid our current cluster in the Middle East.  There are times when unwavering, over-whelming force is required, with the realization that bombs sometimes go astray and collateral damage occurs.  It may be hard to transpose the lessons of a tactical engagement in Bosnia to an air campaign in Syria, but in warfare, it's sometimes necessary to put the JAGs (and politicians) on a leash and relentlessly pound your enemy.  Especially when you're fighting savages who long for the good ol' days of the 7th Century and understand nothing but the business end of a JDAM or SDB. 

By the way, the Serbs stayed quiet around Tuzla for many weeks after that October engagement.  Few lessons are as clear--or brutal--as a 105 round landing in your sniper's nest.  

-- Nate Hale in The Lawyer's War

Quote of the Day III

"When you have an axe to grind with 5yr old boys, maybe you shouldn't teach kindergarten."

-- from the story of the Kindergarten teacher who denies Legos to boys because 'gender equity.'

Quote of the Day IV

America is in the grip of a crisis, namely a shortage of normal people. Evidence indicates that the population of kooks and freaks is rapidly increasing, and there are simply not enough sane people to keep the weirdos under control. Especially among the under-30 demographic, the United States is struggling to cope with the proliferation of dangerous perverts, drug addicts, psychotics and Ivy League liberal arts majors.

-- Robert S. McCain in Is Your Kid a Weirdo?

Quote of the Day V

"If you read Vox on how to survive Thanksgiving, you are the person your family is trying to survive."

Larry Correia: Some Thoughts on Paris

Some of the most clarifying writing on the war with IS I've read yet. Read the whole thing.

Welcome to the Age of the Microcomplaint

Bellyaching for sympathy is not new behavior. But on social media, in an era in which everyone, as per Tony Soprano, is "crying and confessing and complaining," it is being legitimized and rewarded in ways we have never seen. Gary Cooper probably would not have grumbled about the Starbucks barista misspelling his name in order to gain points.

"Never tell your problems to anyone," the legendary football coach Lou Holtz said. "Twenty percent don't care, and the other 80 percent are glad you have them."

Those numbers may need some revision.

Prince Charles: Global Warming Caused the Syrian War

Question: Why Does Global Warming Only Turn Muslims Into Terrorists?

NY Daily News Shills For 'Anti-Terrorist' Gun Control Law, Shamelessly Demonizes the NRA

The problem with the law in question is that it would deny gun rights to anyone on the no-fly list or even on a terrorism 'watch-list' and there is no legal process for determining if you're on these lists much less getting off of them nor any criteria for being put on them in the first place. So all it would take is the next Lois Lerner to secretly decide that the members of a Tea Party group constitute a terrorism threat and boom all your NICS checks come back with a denied result and there's nothing you can do about it. As written the law is simply way too open for abuse. And probably unconstitutional. And sponsored by Chuck Schumer BIRM.

And of course Donald Trump fully supports this law.

dailyrefuse

Columbia Student Says She Is Traumatized After Being Forced To Read About White People In Class

So traumatized that she's now on track to take 6 years to graduate. Damn that white patriarchy.

Dartmouth Dean Inge-Lise Ameer Apologizes For Saying Conservatives Are 'Not Nice People'

She's lying of course.

Men Are Not Monsters

"Most males do not hurt females or other males, or even dogs and cats. Yet they're all treated as potential perpetrators, and our boys feel the weight of this prejudice."

And I don't blame her son from walking out of the assembly. The problem I've always had with the mantra that a man should never hit a women is that it's wrong. There are in fact times when it's okay (and even necessary) to hit a woman - to wit: when she's harming others, harming herself and in your own self defense.

Now I understand that this is simplified down to never-hit-a-woman for the younger and/or dimmer bulbs among the XY set but by the time they're 16 or so,  it should be possible to have a more nuanced conversation in which it's made clear that one should never hit a woman except in a few rather exceptional circumstances - and if you do, you better be damn sure those circumstances apply or there will be hell to pay. The problem with mantras is that they tend to replace actual moral reasoning with arbitrary unthinking rules.

Predicting Your Child's Intelligence With a Raisin

The raisin test and the classic marshmallow test have proven remarkably effective at predicting a child's future success. Which isn't that surprising since the tests measure a child's self-control and ability to plan for the future - both key factors in life success. And in surviving the Gom Jabbar.

marshmallowtest

Things to Ponder:

1. Only two people born in the 1800s are still alive today.

2. You won't live to see the final Star Wars movie.

FAA To Drone Owners: Get Ready To Register

17 Backstories To Why Actors And Actresses Were Written Out Of TV Shows

Dissing Rhea Perlman, early onset MPB, and giant boobs oh my.

angelheartoTK1yv2

Genius: Whisky and Bourbon Advent Calendars

the-whisky-advent-calendar

The Yahoo AoSHQ group - it's got electrolytes and shit.

And my twitter thang.

Tonight's post brought to you by everyday special effects:

funny_pictures_of_the_day_216

Notice: Posted by permission of AceCorp LLC. Please remain in place and still while you are scanned. Okay you are free to go, human.

Posted by: Maetenloch at 10:45 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of page)

1 night all

Posted by: Kindltot at November 23, 2015 10:48 PM (q2o38)

2 Well, I'll be!

Posted by: mindful webworker - okay at November 23, 2015 10:49 PM (ACs58)

3 At least I didn't say furst.

Posted by: mindful webworker - oh, well at November 23, 2015 10:49 PM (ACs58)

4 Most men are not pedophiles, but all men are suspected of being pedophiles.

Posted by: THDeering at November 23, 2015 10:51 PM (clvMJ)

5 Kindergarten. Funny word. Sounds German. Probably is German. Those Germans love putting people in schools. Schools and camps. But not the good kind of camps, where you put your sleeping bunkmate's hand in a glass of warm water at two in the morning. What kind of jerk does that? Funny, though.

Posted by: not Donald Trump at November 23, 2015 10:52 PM (me1tS)

6 Maet thank you for the ONT
happy birthday everyone

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 10:52 PM (uZNvH)

7 'Lo, 'rons...

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 10:53 PM (EzgxV)

8 I don't know if it'll work, but in my nic is one of my favorite websites.

Ol Remus and the Woodpile Report is back after a hiatus.
This little site only publishes Tuesdays (or near thereof), and offers more food for thought per page than most.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at November 23, 2015 10:54 PM (kKHcp)

9 Ok, the is my cue, adios nightstalkers. Keep the fires burning.

Posted by: dogfish at November 23, 2015 10:55 PM (0O2Lr)

10 At least we're done with Monday.

Posted by: Beth M at November 23, 2015 10:55 PM (kiy9d)

11 Well I'll be, it worked.
Thanks, whoever taught me that.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at November 23, 2015 10:56 PM (kKHcp)

12 Furst.

Posted by: Stephen Furst at November 23, 2015 10:56 PM (RU5ki)

13 Great ONT! Thanks for all you o!

Posted by: ALH at November 23, 2015 10:57 PM (Z56vq)

14 That seventeen reasons article was almost kinda interesting.

Posted by: THDeering at November 23, 2015 10:57 PM (clvMJ)

15 >>>Tonight's post brought to you by everyday special effects:<<<



That's how they faked the moon landing!!!

Posted by: guy in tinfoil hat at November 23, 2015 10:58 PM (REdlt)

16 evening all

The kindergarten teacher. I have no words for that monster. She should teacher of the year award, when hell freezes over. That's when she should be allowed to teach in any school, for a paycheck, as well.

Posted by: Moki at November 23, 2015 10:59 PM (7q2ch)

17 Anyone ever deal with FMLA paperwork?.mYou have a doctor hassling a terminally person with trivial bullshit and creatint unneccessary stress and confusion for an already sick, confused and worried disoriented person. Democrats and businesses who fight democrats and doctors caught in the middle can all kiss my ass. What fucking typical democrat do gooder terrible muther fu kung law. Ill never forget or forgive the heartlessness of the whole process. They can all stick this piece of shit law up their ass. That is all.

Posted by: Duck at November 23, 2015 10:59 PM (9wcSE)

18 "When you have an axe to grind with 5yr old boys, maybe you shouldn't teach kindergarten."





She should be fired on the spot

Posted by: TheQuietMan at November 23, 2015 10:59 PM (45oDG)

19 I never liked marshmallows and being clever got me beat up a lot.

So I don't get it.

Posted by: THDeering at November 23, 2015 11:00 PM (clvMJ)

20 Prince Charles was once a genius and talented artist. Alas, anthropogenic global climate chaos destroyed this fine young man's abilities and left him the wretched casualty we know today.

Global worming - is there anything it can't do!

Posted by: mindful webworker - true lie at November 23, 2015 11:01 PM (ACs58)

21 I downloaded Larry's first Monster Hunter book which was free and am looking forward to reading it.



They should probably be in every school library.

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 23, 2015 11:03 PM (AC0lD)

22 Furst.
Posted by: Stephen Furst


I hallucinated that.

Posted by: Jeffrey Sinclair at November 23, 2015 11:05 PM (FkBIv)

23 "the United States is struggling to cope with the proliferation of dangerous perverts, drug addicts, psychotics and, worst of all, Ivy League liberal arts majors."

Fixed for accuracy.


Posted by: Ostral B Heretic at November 23, 2015 11:06 PM (5zyvn)

24 Public Service Announcement for all College Men

More: http://politicalhat.com/?p=10217

Posted by: The Political Hat at November 23, 2015 11:06 PM (vBeA5)

25 So Lisa Bonet was kicked off the Cosby show because she did a top-less spread, eh?

This might be sick to think about, but given Cosby's proclivities, maybe he attempted something with Bonet later in her life?

Posted by: Thrawn at November 23, 2015 11:07 PM (wZ2hu)

26 17 Backstories To Why Actors And Actresses Were Written Out Of TV Shows

I still would like to have been the next guy to get sick of Shannen Doherty c. 1995.

Posted by: to the DeLorean! at November 23, 2015 11:08 PM (me1tS)

27 Holy crap, what does it take to post around here?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:08 PM (PgUZC)

28 Ricardo Kill I don't know

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:08 PM (uZNvH)

29 Wurst!

Posted by: Knockwurst at November 23, 2015 11:09 PM (+1T7c)

30 I didn't have the patience to read either the raisin or marshmallow articles.

What were they about?

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 23, 2015 11:09 PM (T78UI)

31 Never, ever make eye contact with crazy people.

Posted by: THDeering at November 23, 2015 11:09 PM (clvMJ)

32 Speaking of being written out of shows reminds me of

Chuck Cunningham Syndrome
TV Tropes
http://bit.ly/1SgEv7u

And, swapping actors in a role mid-stream always seemed disturbing. We're supposed to believe Samantha just wiggled her nose and altered her husband's person?

Posted by: mindful webworker - exit, stage up at November 23, 2015 11:09 PM (ACs58)

33 " At least we're done with Monday."



There will be another.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:10 PM (PgUZC)

34 Holy crap, what does it take to post around here?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:08 PM (PgUZC)

An upgraded membership, or maybe alcohol.

Posted by: Blano at November 23, 2015 11:10 PM (C3E0x)

35 Damn, Larry's article was great.



I never went to school in the States, but American kids should recite Larry's article word for word everyday in every school in America after the Pledge of Allegiance.

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 23, 2015 11:10 PM (AC0lD)

36 27 Holy crap, what does it take to post around here?

---------

Background check, fingerprints, current Safe Commenting certificate and an 8-day waiting period.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at November 23, 2015 11:11 PM (RU5ki)

37 Durst!

Posted by: Fred at November 23, 2015 11:11 PM (REdlt)

38 Evening all!

A have an update to last night's ONT Bad Client Saga.

Said bad client (who let his employees bitch slap me publicly --which the boss just ignored-- when in fact, I was doing him a favor; this is a very expurgated version of events) was supposed to call me today to talk things out. It was his idea.

Never happened.

Totally blew me off. No call, no email, no text.

Which does indeed confirm that he and his partner - who is the only I work with 98% of the time- apparently can't be bothered with the issue of me leaving.

Says a lot, doesn't it?

However, I am taking Maet's advice. Better clients, more money, less work and happier. That is my plan.

Posted by: shibumi who is awash in existential dread at November 23, 2015 11:11 PM (9JJgN)

39 27
Holy crap, what does it take to post around here?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:08 PM (PgUZC)


Charlie Sheen can post around here. He EARNED that privilege.

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 23, 2015 11:12 PM (AC0lD)

40 Speaking of being written out of shows reminds me of

Chuck Cunningham Syndrome


Chester on Gunsmoke.
Get off my lawn.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at November 23, 2015 11:12 PM (FkBIv)

41 25 So Lisa Bonet was kicked off the Cosby show because she did a top-less spread, eh?

This might be sick to think about, but given Cosby's proclivities, maybe he attempted something with Bonet later in her life?
Posted by: Thrawn at November 23, 2015 11:07 PM (wZ2hu)

Could he have possibly tried something with her then, and when she said no/reported it he had her fired?

I hate to think he did all those horrible things-he was an actor I truly admired-but with all these different women coming forward, it's really hard to believe he did nothing.

Posted by: Moki at November 23, 2015 11:12 PM (7q2ch)

42 However, I am taking Maet's advice. Better clients, more money, less work and happier. That is my plan.


Posted by: shibumi who is awash in existential dread at November 23, 2015 11:11 PM (9JJgN)


Good for you. Life's too short.

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 23, 2015 11:12 PM (AC0lD)

43 Ok, now see? That Chuck Cunningham Syndrome was interesting.

Kudos and huzzas to Mindful.

Posted by: THDeering at November 23, 2015 11:13 PM (clvMJ)

44 I still would like to have been the next guy to get sick of Shannen Doherty c. 1995.
Posted by: to the DeLorean! at November 23, 2015 11:08 PM (me1tS)


Me too. Sure she was/is a PITA bitch, but I'd be willing to sign the waivers and go in with my eyes wide open.

Posted by: Maetenloch at November 23, 2015 11:13 PM (pAlYe)

45 "Ricardo Kill I don't know"


Is it just me? What a fcuking mess.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:13 PM (HAVy1)

46 Oh yeah. Tip o' the ol' topper to Maet for another fine post. I noticed Ace was stealing from you today!

Been a day. Now for a night.

Good night, Gracies!

Posted by: mindful webworker - exit, laughing at November 23, 2015 11:13 PM (ACs58)

47 Holy crap, what does it take to post around here?

ONT loophole.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at November 23, 2015 11:14 PM (FkBIv)

48 shibumi sounds like things are looking up maybe?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:14 PM (uZNvH)

49 22 Furst.
Posted by: Stephen Furst

I hallucinated that.

Posted by: Jeffrey Sinclair at November 23, 2015 11:05 PM (FkBIv)


I only became aware of Michael O'Hare's schizophrenia a few weeks ago. Some B5 fan *I* am.

/continues to seeth at Vivendi for cancelling "Into the Fire" flight sim

Posted by: antisocial justice beatnik at November 23, 2015 11:14 PM (EHU9F)

50 Accursed!

Posted by: Job at November 23, 2015 11:14 PM (RU5ki)

51 "or maybe alcohol."


Taken care of. Not that.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:15 PM (DmsIN)

52 wow shibumi. that is pretty crappy of the client/boss. I wish you far greater success with better people.

Posted by: Moki at November 23, 2015 11:16 PM (7q2ch)

53 Unless waiting will provide you additional information, I don't see how delaying making a decision until the last second is the proper action.

Posted by: Max Rockatansky at November 23, 2015 11:17 PM (FCAbp)

54 Well, so much for The Undertaker.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:17 PM (7swd+)

55 Submersed!

Posted by: Capt. Nemo and The Nautilus at November 23, 2015 11:17 PM (REdlt)

56 America is in the grip of a crisis, namely a shortage of normal people

Ain't that the truth.

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:19 PM (rjtGa)

57 There are in fact times when it's okay (and even necessary) to hit a woman - to wit: when she's harming others, harming herself and in your own self defense.

So if she's harming herself you have to figure, "What the hell? She's doing it ..." and smack her around a little to get in on the fun.

Also, if she undercooks the scrambled eggs and tries to feed you this runny, snot-like shit, a mild beating usually stops that in the future.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:20 PM (zc3Db)

58 44 I still would like to have been the next guy to get sick of Shannen Doherty c. 1995.
Posted by: to the DeLorean! at November 23, 2015 11:08 PM (me1tS)

Me too. Sure she was/is a PITA bitch, but I'd be willing to sign the waivers and go in with my eyes wide open.
Posted by: Maetenloch at November 23, 2015 11:13 PM (pAlYe)


I would teach her the meaning of the word "respect".

Posted by: Carl Spackler, Asst. Greenskeeper at November 23, 2015 11:21 PM (Z7G74)

59 "Chester on Gunsmoke."


Yeah, Chester and his curdled biscuits. But Festus had his thing.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:21 PM (7swd+)

60 Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:20 PM (zc3Db)

oh please tell me you're joking

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:22 PM (uZNvH)

61 Also, if she undercooks the scrambled eggs and tries to feed you this
runny, snot-like shit, a mild beating usually stops that in the future.



Because how hard is it to poach a goddamn egg?!?

Posted by: Sterling Archer at November 23, 2015 11:22 PM (dcCJA)

62 Speaking of characters written out... whatever happened to Spearchucker Jones in M*A*S*H? His name alone should have kept him a role for the duration of the series, maybe even a spinoff.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 23, 2015 11:22 PM (T78UI)

63 "I would teach her the meaning of the word "respect".


I'm curious, Carl. You weren't exactly "normal" yourself?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:23 PM (7swd+)

64 It's actually not that easy to poach an egg, I think

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:23 PM (uZNvH)

65 Also, if she undercooks the scrambled eggs and tries to feed you this runny, snot-like shit, a mild beating usually stops that in the future.

--------------

Runny eggs. I hadn't considered that one. Thanks.

Posted by: Ike Turner at November 23, 2015 11:23 PM (RU5ki)

66 hey, anyone know where berserker is these days?

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 23, 2015 11:25 PM (vb33c)

67 Damn Maet! Thank you for the great ONT. I'm still getting through it.

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 23, 2015 11:25 PM (AC0lD)

68 "It's actually not that easy to poach an egg, I think"


Crack an egg into boiling water, no?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:26 PM (iCHcT)

69 52
wow shibumi. that is pretty crappy of the client/boss. I wish you far greater success with better people.
---

Thank you Moki. My current rationalization is "it's them, not me." They generally get a bit insane at this time of year, and for the past two years at this time, I've almost quit. Have almost quit at least five times in a little over three years. That can't be a good sign. Funny thing is, the whole episode involves the guy I rarely work with who I have an excellent relationship with. LOL. He beat the odds!

Lesson to all moron supervisors?

When someone tells you that they are ending their business relationship via email and then lets you know that they will be sending a final invoice on Monday, you should not respond "Uh, OK" if you want to continue the relationship.

Just sayin'

Posted by: shibumi who is awash in existential dread at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (9JJgN)

70 It's actually not that easy to poach an egg, I think


Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:23 PM (uZNvH)
Doing it old-school, in steaming chicken broth, is a PITA.However, now that I got myself some backyard chickens and fresh eggs I need to try it again (the white are much thicker/cohesive than store bought).

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (T78UI)

71 I would have fixed Shannon.



I would. And then we would make sweet sweet love.

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (rjtGa)

72 57 Also, if she undercooks the scrambled eggs and tries to feed you this runny, snot-like shit, a mild beating usually stops that in the future.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:20 PM (zc3Db)


A mild thumping upon the forehead with a yolk-covered fork generally suffices.

Posted by: antisocial justice beatnik at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (EHU9F)

73 and in your own self defense.

NOW you tell me...

Posted by: Rhonda Rousey at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (yddCj)

74 So, for Arbalest when he gets here -- here's why I don't think it's his ignition key switch -- https://youtu.be/UAREADz7BMA (first two minutes). Here's the vid that finally told me where the damned PGM-FI thing was -- https://youtu.be/38DQ5IVQQ68 .

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (EzgxV)

75
Crack an egg into boiling water, no?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:26 PM (iCHcT)

Alton Brown says it shouldn't be boiling
And how long do you cook it for?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (uZNvH)

76 Crack an egg into boiling water, no?

You make it sound so easy.

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (rjtGa)

77 Spare the spatula, spoil the bitch.

Posted by: Ike Turner at November 23, 2015 11:28 PM (RU5ki)

78 The Chinese news animators on ClockMed...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=At29FfoMQ7E&feature=youtu.be

Posted by: andycanuck at November 23, 2015 11:28 PM (xodPA)

79 Lisa Bonet was written off of the Cosby Show for 'creative differences', but in reality it was because she was in Angel Heart and had done a topless spread in a magazine. It didn't fit with Cosby's vision so she was fired.

It wasn't that Bonet had been nude and topless that bothered Cosby, but that she was conscious at the time. If there's anything Cosby won't abide is a conscious naked woman.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:29 PM (zc3Db)

80 Scarlett Pomers that the mention from the Reba show was on Star Trek: Voyager. She played the little girl and had a lot of great scenes with Seven of Nine.



I hope she's doing better now.

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 23, 2015 11:30 PM (AC0lD)

81 Evening horde.

Set your DVR! Rove is in Fox!

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 23, 2015 11:30 PM (9jeGC)

82 >>>>Also, if she undercooks the scrambled eggs and tries to feed you this
runny, snot-like shit, a mild beating usually stops that in the future.



Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:20 PM (zc3Db) <<<






This is an absolutely horrible thing to joke about!



She shouldn't be wasting her efforts on eggs, she should be making a sammich.

Posted by: grunting primitive in his mancave at November 23, 2015 11:31 PM (REdlt)

83 This is going to get out of hand, and we'll be lucky to live through it...

Posted by: Last at November 23, 2015 11:33 PM (8HiDF)

84 I don't know, I think poached eggs are still probably kinda challenging

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:33 PM (uZNvH)

85 And how long do you cook it for?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (uZNvH)


Until you don't get beaten when you serve it!

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:34 PM (zc3Db)

86 Eggs Benedict.
I used to go into a place that had them on the menu, and I would almost always get that menu item.

Eventually the waitress mentioned the cook hated the dish because he couldn't get the eggs right.

I didn't care, and kept ordering it. They were good enough for me.

Posted by: THDeering at November 23, 2015 11:34 PM (clvMJ)

87 Damn. ONT under 100 comments.

Holiday weeks suck.

My iPad is glitchy as hell.

Yay! Monday.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 23, 2015 11:35 PM (9jeGC)

88 Maet,

The correct rule is: Never hit a lady!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at November 23, 2015 11:35 PM (Zu3d9)

89 Never tried to poach an egg. Wondered how the contents would stay together in boiling water. But people apparently do it.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:35 PM (zh83O)

90 Oh, In the short lived TV series "Dead Like Me" there was a bit where Rube is doing the cooking and can't get the poached eggs right.

Posted by: THDeering at November 23, 2015 11:36 PM (clvMJ)

91 And how long do you cook it for?


Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (uZNvH)
Just like everything else, until it is done just the way you like it. Myself, soft yolk... now I have to make some eggs benedict this weekend, hawaiian or filipino style .

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 23, 2015 11:36 PM (T78UI)

92 Holiday weeks suck.

My iPad is glitchy as hell.

Yay! Monday.


Is that a Haiku or a Trumpism?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at November 23, 2015 11:37 PM (FkBIv)

93 I won't live to see the last Star Wars movie?

I got some breaking news for you...I will live to not see the very next one.

In fact I will live long enough to never see any of them ever again. Happily.

Shove that up you exhaust portal.

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:37 PM (rjtGa)

94 Evenin' everyone.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 23, 2015 11:38 PM (YJmuy)

95 Juan Williams looks high as hell.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 23, 2015 11:38 PM (9jeGC)

96 " Eggs Benedict. "


Have had exactly one time. The eggs were runny but the sauce was good. Didn't kill me.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:39 PM (IWgMg)

97 The correct rule is: Never hit a lady!

Specifically a "lady"?

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:39 PM (rjtGa)

98 Never tried to poach an egg. Wondered how the contents would stay together in boiling water. But people apparently do it.
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:35 PM (zh83O)

******

Uummmm.....you put them in individual egg cups that go above a pan with boiling water under it.

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at November 23, 2015 11:39 PM (xNYi9)

99 89 Never tried to poach an egg. Wondered how the contents would stay together in boiling water. But people apparently do it.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:35 PM (zh83O)



It's not boiling water, it's simmering water. And you can cheat -- http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B014GXMLC6 .

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:39 PM (EzgxV)

100 One man's lady is another man's person.

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:39 PM (rjtGa)

101 Chrome on iPad absolutely sucks for commenting.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at November 23, 2015 11:40 PM (RU5ki)

102 Never tried to poach an egg. Wondered how the contents would stay together in boiling water. But people apparently do it.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:35 PM (zh83O)
Crack it into a large spoon and then carefully slide it into the steaming water/broth. If the water is boiling the convection currents (roiling) will tear it apart and you end up with lumpy egg drop soup. Also, older eggs have softer whites that wash away leaving not much white around the yolk.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 23, 2015 11:40 PM (T78UI)

103 Uummmm.....you put them in individual egg cups that go above a pan with boiling water under it.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty


That's the way Mom did them. Dad liked them on toast.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at November 23, 2015 11:40 PM (FkBIv)

104 Uummmm.....you put them in individual egg cups that go above a pan with boiling water under it.

That was not in the manual.

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:41 PM (rjtGa)

105 97 The correct rule is: Never hit a lady!

Specifically a "lady"?

---------

I smell a loophole.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at November 23, 2015 11:41 PM (RU5ki)

106 Never tried to poach an egg. Wondered how the contents would stay together in boiling water. But people apparently do it.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:35 PM (zh83O)


The only time I ever poach an egg is when I'm looking to soft boil them and drop one in the pot too quickly and the shell cracks on the bottom. Then it comes out poached perfectly ... but I wanted it soft-boiled ...

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:42 PM (zc3Db)

107 How does the chicken get all the egg stuff in the shell and then close up the shell?

Posted by: eman at November 23, 2015 11:42 PM (MQEz6)

108 Look just put the butter in the pan at medium and crack the eggs in the pan 45 seconds later voila delicious fried eggs.

No cups no boiling no confusion nothing.

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM (rjtGa)

109 Is that a Haiku or a Trumpism

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at November 23, 2015 11:37 PM (FkBIv)

Failure on both parts. Just rambling.

And damn this is pissing me off. Type about 30 characters and have to wait for it to catch up.


And did I get abused as a child? I thought poached eggs were eggs broken open into boiling water and then placed in toast?

Any lawyers around?

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM (9jeGC)

110 On toast.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM (9jeGC)

111 You can buy these Teflon egg-poacher scoop things, which work pretty well. They tell you to add vinegar to the water, though. Then you have slightly-vinegary eggs. Who wants that? There's gotta be a better way.

Maybe CBD can learn us all on a weekend Food Thread sometime.

Posted by: barbecue poached eggs? at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM (me1tS)

112 90
Oh, In the short lived TV series "Dead Like Me" there was a bit where
Rube is doing the cooking and can't get the poached eggs right.





Posted by: THDeering at November 23, 2015 11:36 PM (clvMJ)


I LOVED that show. I discovered it when the Sci Fi channel in Ohio played it. Bought the DVDs. Watched some of them with my god-daughter who loved it too.

They brought it back. I think they were trying to rekindle interest. But Rube wasn't in it.



And to tie up tonight's ONT into a nice little bow.....

-the police officer on 'Dead Like Me' was hot Jasmine from 'A Different World.'
-Yes, 'A Different World' with Lisa Bonet mentioned above - damn she was hot....
-And Dwayne Wayne from 'A Different World' is back on television, he's unrecognizable except for his name and plays the father on Disney's "K.C. Undercover." The show's cute and stars 19 year old Zendaya who's very hot, gorgeous hair and plays a spy. She's often in sexy fight scenes wearing tight outfits. I was channel flipping, saw her in a thigh revealing skirt kicking ass and thought "Hmmm, I should watch Disney channel more..."


Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM (AC0lD)

113 Never tried to poach an egg. Wondered how the contents would stay together in boiling water. But people apparently do it.

Put 1/2 cup water in a one cup, cup. Crack an egg into it. Put it into the microwave for 55 seconds with a cover over it. Fish it out with slotted spoon and adjust up or down to taste.

Posted by: dartist at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM (/tTDo)

114 Me too. Sure she was/is a PITA bitch, but I'd be willing to sign the waivers and go in with my eyes wide open.
I'm sorry but you'll have to wear these safety glasses for that.

Posted by: los angeles dept of porn production at November 23, 2015 11:44 PM (xodPA)

115 That is way too much work for eggs
Much easier to do scrambled eggs

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:44 PM (uZNvH)

116 I was watching Emeril Lagasse on Food Network and he was cooking up a specialty dish. Made his own sausage on camera, grinding the meat, mixing it up, making a pattie. Did a sauce, I forget the details.

Poached an egg, put it on an English Muffin (don't remember if he made the muffin or not. It's a lot of work to make an English Muffin from scratch.)

And served the dish to a lady, on camera. She said, "It's just like Eggs Benedict"

Emeril gave her a look that would have killed a normal human.

Posted by: THDeering at November 23, 2015 11:45 PM (clvMJ)

117 On toast.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM (9jeGC)


"In" toast are one-eyed Egyptians. One of the best egg dishes around.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:45 PM (zc3Db)

118 Tomorrow the ONT will be dedicated to really great oatmeal.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at November 23, 2015 11:45 PM (RU5ki)

119 Hey everybody.

Gotta hope Mackenzie Phillips is in that story about actors who were written out of their hit shows. OMG she was a trainwreck from what I recall.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 23, 2015 11:46 PM (ntObR)

120 Can I punch Ronda Rousey if she gives me lip?

Posted by: Max Rockatansky at November 23, 2015 11:46 PM (FCAbp)

121 Cooking tips are awesome.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:46 PM (lAHOS)

122 Put 1/2 cup water in a one cup, cup. Crack an egg into it. Put it into the microwave for 55 seconds with a cover over it. Fish it out with slotted spoon and adjust up or down to taste.

That's a pretty radical theory. This could get ugly.

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:46 PM (rjtGa)

123 And did I get abused as a child? I thought poached eggs were eggs broken open into boiling water and then placed in toast?



On toast.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM (9jeGC)


"Man in the Boat" is where you make a hole in a piece of bread, put in the frying pan, and break an egg into the hole. You can probably sex it up by using french toast.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 23, 2015 11:47 PM (T78UI)

124 Those egg rings are also helpful for making an egg for a bagel or English Muffin breakfast sammich.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:47 PM (EzgxV)

125
huhuhuh uh huhuh... "grinding the meat"... huhuhuhuh

Posted by: butthead at November 23, 2015 11:47 PM (EWg9n)

126 And served the dish to a lady, on camera. She said, "It's just like Eggs Benedict"

Emeril gave her a look that would have killed a normal human.

Posted by: THDeering at November 23, 2015 11:45 PM (clvMJ)


She really wanted to say "Egg McMuffin"!

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:47 PM (zc3Db)

127 The tricky part of poaching an egg is keeping the white from going everywhere after you drop it in, if you swirl the water in a circular motion before putting the egg in, the swirling motion usually hold the white together, also crack the egg into a bowl first so you can slowly ease it into the water.

Posted by: All Teh Meh at November 23, 2015 11:47 PM (nithJ)

128 Evening everyone. Hired a girl to watch my dad from 10 to 6 am tonight and if it were up to me she'd be back home already. Looks like I'll be up awhile walking guard duty.

Posted by: dartist at November 23, 2015 11:48 PM (/tTDo)

129 I still need to know what kind of pan I should get for a glass top stove that will work for cooking a steak, evidently cast iron doesn't work

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:48 PM (uZNvH)

130 Wondered how the contents would stay together in boiling water.

Just say they're contained. Works every time!

Posted by: Barack Hussein Obama at November 23, 2015 11:48 PM (yddCj)

131 I smell a loophole.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at November 23, 2015 11:41 PM (RU5ki)


it's a trick, there is no loophole.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 23, 2015 11:48 PM (vb33c)

132 "That is way too much work for eggs
Much easier to do scrambled eggs"



Generally fry 'em omelot style. Had an egg sammich for supper.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:49 PM (2VGCr)

133 "keeping the white from going everywhere after you drop it in"


huhuhuh uh huhuhuh

Posted by: butthead at November 23, 2015 11:49 PM (EWg9n)

134 110 On toast.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM (9jeGC)


I'm not certain why this is all so difficult to comprehend.

Posted by: CPT Oveur at November 23, 2015 11:49 PM (EHU9F)

135 Put 1/2 cup water in a one cup, cup. Crack an egg
into it. Put it into the microwave for 55 seconds with a cover over it.
Fish it out with slotted spoon and adjust up or down to taste.


Posted by: dartist at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM (/tTDo)

That is brilliant

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:49 PM (uZNvH)

136 One Eyed Egyptian - that just sounds so weird...

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 23, 2015 11:49 PM (T78UI)

137 129 I still need to know what kind of pan I should get for a glass top stove that will work for cooking a steak, evidently cast iron doesn't work

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:48 PM (uZNvH)



Is it induction or just electric?

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:49 PM (EzgxV)

138 Tomorrow the ONT will be dedicated to really great oatmeal.

In this theoretical "really great oatmeal " universe ,everything would be really great.

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:49 PM (rjtGa)

139 "Man in the Boat" is where you make a hole in a piece of bread, put in the frying pan, and break an egg into the hole. You can probably sex it up by using french toast.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 23, 2015 11:47 PM (T78UI)


I like our name more. And you forgot the 3 pounds of butter.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:49 PM (zc3Db)

140 128
Evening everyone. Hired a girl to watch my dad from 10 to 6 am tonight
and if it were up to me she'd be back home already. Looks like I'll be
up awhile walking guard duty.


Posted by: dartist at November 23, 2015 11:48 PM (/tTDo)


I hope everything goes well

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:50 PM (uZNvH)

141 You make it sound so easy.
1. 1 1/2 in. of salted water in a frying pan.
2. Bring to boil and turn down heat.
3. When simmering, crack one or two or three eggs and gently plop into pan.
4. Spoon water over yolks unless you like sunny-side up.
5. When whites are done, remove with slotted spoon and serve on on toasted english muffin halves.

The entire process takes five minutes tops.

Posted by: Mickey and Sylvia at November 23, 2015 11:50 PM (QP2lF)

142 The tricky part of poaching an egg is keeping the white from going
everywhere after you drop it in, if you swirl the water in a circular
motion before putting the egg in, the swirling motion usually hold the
white together, also crack the egg into a bowl first so you can slowly
ease it into the water.

Check out 113. The secret is in the one cup, cup.

Posted by: dartist at November 23, 2015 11:50 PM (/tTDo)

143 "Man in the Boat" is where you make a hole in a piece of bread, put in the frying pan, and break an egg into the hole

That was my favorite when I was a kid, we called it egg in the basket.

Posted by: All Teh Meh at November 23, 2015 11:51 PM (nithJ)

144 Is it induction or just electric?

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:49 PM (EzgxV)

I think it is electric

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:51 PM (uZNvH)

145 128 Evening everyone. Hired a girl to watch my dad from 10 to 6 am tonight and if it were up to me she'd be back home already. Looks like I'll be up awhile walking guard duty.

Posted by: dartist at November 23, 2015 11:48 PM (/tTDo)



What, is he flirting with her?

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:51 PM (EzgxV)

146 She really wanted to say "Egg McMuffin"!

Now that you mention it, that might have been what she said!

Posted by: THDeering at November 23, 2015 11:51 PM (clvMJ)

147 " Those egg rings are also helpful for making an egg for a bagel or English Muffin breakfast sammich."


Heh. Looked for those things.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:51 PM (yQyvL)

148 "In" toast are one-eyed Egyptians. One of the best egg dishes around.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:45 PM (zc3Db)

I feel this needs to be crybullied!

*where did I put my safe space

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 23, 2015 11:52 PM (9jeGC)

149 Eggs Benedict is my most favorite breakfast on the rare occasion I eat breakfast. Mostly reserved for holiday brunches. Hollandaise sauce is a bitch to make correctly. It takes a lot of patience and time.

Posted by: L, Elle at November 23, 2015 11:52 PM (2x3L+)

150 After I left Marshall Dillon, I got my gimpy leg fixed, and ended up riding horses through traffic in New York City.

Posted by: Chester at November 23, 2015 11:52 PM (OG7NC)

151 Posted by: barbecue poached eggs? at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM (me1tS)

I have never barbequed an egg!

There is a cute trick to poaching eggs, but only works for one at a time.

In a small pot or saucepan, boil water and then add a few drops of vinegar...less than half a teaspoon. Crack an egg into a small glass or ramekin, then swirl the water so that it is moving as fast as you can get it. Slide the egg into the water, and the rotation of the water will tighten the egg so that it is a nice blob, rather than a spread out mess.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at November 23, 2015 11:52 PM (Zu3d9)

152 we called it egg in the basket.

Yep, egg in a basket. And get that bread covered with butter and toasted.

Posted by: t-bird at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (yddCj)

153 10-0.

Suck it Goodell.

Posted by: Darth Hoodie at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (REdlt)

154 144 Is it induction or just electric?

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:49 PM (EzgxV)
I think it is electric

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:51 PM (uZNvH)



If you turn a burner on, does it get hot if there's nothing on it? (that would indicate electric).

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (EzgxV)

155 How do you BBQ an egg? Maybe with a flamethrower?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (uZNvH)

156 Poached:
Yep, AllTehMeh has it. Stir up the simmering water gently with a spoon before sliding the egg into it from a smooth shallow dish.

Scrambled:
Non-stick pan, mebbe 8". Scramble the eggs, into the pan on low heat, stirring constantly with a silicon spatula. Move away from heat if it starts clotting up too fast.

low and slow is the key.

Once it's starting to resemble scrambled eggs, season, and add herbs, cream, shredded cheese etc .

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (9YDUz)

157 They brought it back. I think they were trying to rekindle interest. But Rube wasn't in it.
That was the feature movie. It wasn't very good mainly due to Rube not being in it and how the plot put his replacement in the show. And I loved the series too and have the DVD set too.

I also want to contact Patinkin and see if he could talk the Homeland writers into doing a scene between him and Carrie where he gets angry at her (that's happened often enough!) and says to her something like, "You're really beginning to frost my pumpkins, Peanut!"

Posted by: andycanuck at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (xodPA)

158
If you turn a burner on, does it get hot if there's nothing on it? (that would indicate electric).

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (EzgxV)


Yes

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (uZNvH)

159 Posted by: dartist at November 23, 2015 11:50 PM (/tTDo)

Ahh, I've never tried that, I'll have to give it a go next time.

Posted by: All Teh Meh at November 23, 2015 11:54 PM (nithJ)

160 What, is he flirting with her?

I'd buy them both a bottle of something nice if that were the case. He's 91 and his legs quit working.

Posted by: dartist at November 23, 2015 11:54 PM (/tTDo)

161 Er... Not yet.

Refs crowning themselves in glory again...

Posted by: Darth Hoodie at November 23, 2015 11:54 PM (REdlt)

162 Egg McMuffins are yummy.

Screw Emiril.

They're basically the ONE thing McDonald's does really well.

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:54 PM (rjtGa)

163 The best egg and sandwich maker I ever bought was the Ronco Russian Bride.

Act now and they will throw in a matching Ronco Russian Bride for shipping and handling.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 23, 2015 11:54 PM (9jeGC)

164 All, right, buenos.

Hasta.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at November 23, 2015 11:55 PM (yQyvL)

165 We always had egg poachers. A regular pot of water, with a little rack with 6 small tins where each egg was poached and a lid. Put the eggs in, cover, boil. Easy, peasy...



I loved poached eggs bloody....partially cooked....so the yolks would run when you punctured them with a fork. You'd use bread to mop up the yolks. Fantastic....

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 23, 2015 11:55 PM (AC0lD)

166 eleven, once you get an egg ring, Egg McMuffins are ridonkulously easy to make at home.

I like mine with pepper jack cheese, Tabasco mayo and double or triple Canadian bacon.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 23, 2015 11:56 PM (ntObR)

167 158
If you turn a burner on, does it get hot if there's nothing on it? (that would indicate electric).

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (EzgxV)

Yes

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (uZNvH)



That should work with cast iron -- but you have to have the burners at max with the empty pan for a while before you put the steak in -- most electric cooktop elements are pretty weak-ass, but if you can get the pan hot enough, it'll store up enough heat.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:57 PM (EzgxV)

168 Also, medium soft boiled eggs. I still can't figure out the timing for that. It's always hit or miss when I try to do that.

They sell pans at Williams Sonoma for poaching eggs that make it easier.

Seriously, eggs Benedict worth the effort.

Posted by: L, Elle at November 23, 2015 11:57 PM (2x3L+)

169 Ahh, I've never tried that, I'll have to give it a go next time.

Guarantee it works. Just pick something to put on top that won't seal or the egg jumps out every now and again. Try it.

Posted by: dartist at November 23, 2015 11:57 PM (/tTDo)

170 Ok. Now it's over.

Posted by: Darth Hoodie at November 23, 2015 11:57 PM (REdlt)

171 We called it "egg in the hole".

And my mom had a poacher thing with 6 to 8 (can't recall which) of removable poaching cups that she often used for our schooldays' breakfasts. I recall she wiped the egg cups with butter before cracking the eggs in them.

Posted by: andycanuck at November 23, 2015 11:58 PM (xodPA)

172 If you turn a burner on, does it get hot if there's nothing on it? (that would indicate electric).

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (EzgxV)


Touch it and see ... LOL.

You can always do the pacemaker test to see if it's induction, too. That's a hoot.

I have to say that I love my induction plate. It's like magic.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 23, 2015 11:58 PM (zc3Db)

173 eleven, once you get an egg ring, Egg McMuffins are ridonkulously easy to make at home.

I like mine with pepper jack cheese, Tabasco mayo and double or triple Canadian bacon.


Egg ring. Cool. Thanks Steve.

Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:58 PM (rjtGa)

174 Posted by: andycanuck at November 23, 2015 11:53 PM (xodPA)



I thought I read he was hard to work with. He was on Criminal Minds, I don't watch it, for a while I think before leaving. Good actor. Doesn't seem to want to stay around long....

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 23, 2015 11:58 PM (AC0lD)

175 .so the yolks would run when you punctured them with a fork. You'd use bread to mop up the yolks.

I don't know why I find this so satisfying, but I do. Warm, slightly-toasted bread, crispy on the outside, ready to soak up eggs on the inside ...

Now I can't wait for breakfast.

Posted by: goddamn you Horde at November 23, 2015 11:59 PM (me1tS)

176
That should work with cast iron -- but you have
to have the burners at max with the empty pan for a while before you put
the steak in -- most electric cooktop elements are pretty weak-ass, but
if you can get the pan hot enough, it'll store up enough heat.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:57 PM (EzgxV)

But I have read that taking the hot pan from the oven and putting it on the stove can crack the stove top and I don't want that

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:59 PM (uZNvH)

177 How do you BBQ an egg? Maybe with a flamethrower?
Posted by: chemjeff


That's how the Chinese do it.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at November 23, 2015 11:59 PM (FkBIv)

178 Well enough egg talk.



No one tell the gun thread about this....

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 24, 2015 12:00 AM (AC0lD)

179 #165 That's what we had and I tried to describe in #171, Stateless Infidel.

Posted by: andycanuck at November 24, 2015 12:00 AM (xodPA)

180 Evening, all.

I have nothing to add about poaching eggs.

I did catch a poacher in my son's tree stand. He was trying to make himself very skinny to hide behind the trunk.

Posted by: Jinx the Cat at November 24, 2015 12:00 AM (l3vZN)

181 Next thing to master in the deep fryer: Texas egg rolls.

Whodathunk cream cheese and jalapeno bits could be so incredibly tasty together.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:00 AM (ntObR)

182 I loved poached eggs bloody....partially cooked....so the yolks would run when you punctured them with a fork. You'd use bread to mop up the yolks. Fantastic....

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 23, 2015 11:55 PM (AC0lD)


That's how I like my eggs - hard white, soft yoke - but just soft boil them and don't bother with poaching. 5:15 in boiling water and done. Then crush a few handfuls of saltines (matzah during passover) in them and you're good to go.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 12:01 AM (zc3Db)

183 Well I was thinking about making a fancy breakfast for my family when they came and visited for thanksgiving but it turns out they might not be coming after all and they have asked me at this late date if I can visit them on Thursday instead. ugh.

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:01 AM (uZNvH)

184 Also, medium soft boiled eggs. I still can't figure out the timing for that. It's always hit or miss when I try to do that.
Posted by: L, Elle


Julia Child's Six Minute Egg
Bring water to a simmer. Add eggs, cook for 6 min. Remove and let cool until you can pick 'em up in your hand.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 12:02 AM (9YDUz)

185 I only ever have scrambled eggs or omelets, I think

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:02 AM (uZNvH)

186 179
#165 That's what we had and I tried to describe in #171, Stateless Infidel.

Posted by: andycanuck at November 24, 2015 12:00 AM (xodPA)


It can't be that rare!!..?? I thought it was a basic cooking thing everyone had but after reading the thread, I guess not.

Maybe it's a Canadian thing....?

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 24, 2015 12:02 AM (AC0lD)

187 Do you want to go, chemjeff? That's really last minute and inconsiderate to make such a request this late.

Posted by: L, Elle at November 24, 2015 12:03 AM (2x3L+)

188 My next thing is the stove top smoker. It got good reviews but I know it can't match the one outdoors. I hope I didn't piss away another $50 but I miss smoked food in the winter.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:04 AM (/tTDo)

189 Roald Dahl wrote a nice story which included poaching pheasants.

You didn't cook them in simmering water, though, you got them wasted on alcohol-soaked raisins, then you scooped the tipsy bastards up as they fell out of the trees.

That's all I remember.

Posted by: poaching at November 24, 2015 12:04 AM (me1tS)

190 187
Do you want to go, chemjeff? That's really last minute and inconsiderate to make such a request this late.

Posted by: L, Elle at November 24, 2015 12:03 AM (2x3L+)

Well it is only a day's drive

I kinda have to say yes I think although I'm a little peeved

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:04 AM (uZNvH)

191 176
That should work with cast iron -- but you have
to have the burners at max with the empty pan for a while before you put
the steak in -- most electric cooktop elements are pretty weak-ass, but
if you can get the pan hot enough, it'll store up enough heat.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:57 PM (EzgxV)
But I have read that taking the hot pan from the oven and putting it on the stove can crack the stove top and I don't want that

Posted by: chemjeff at November 23, 2015 11:59 PM (uZNvH)




It's not thermal shock if they heat together. Taking a pan that's been in the oven and putting it on a cold cooktop can very much crack the cooktop -- as can putting a block of ice on a hot cooktop. But putting a room temperature pan on the heating element and heating it with the element until the pan is hot will not. And the trick to getting a good sear is to either have enough heating capacity that you don't lose temperature, or having enough thermal mass so that you don't lose temperature.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 12:05 AM (EzgxV)

192 You've only got to poach eggs when they're out of season, right?



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at November 24, 2015 12:05 AM (McRlu)

193 Anyway I thought I might practice cooking a ribeye steak

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:05 AM (uZNvH)

194 Thanks, weft. I cut and pasted that comment and will try it out soonly.

Posted by: L, Elle at November 24, 2015 12:06 AM (2x3L+)

195 Saw Rove on CBS morning show. What a jerk. Why anyone would listen to a word he says is beyond me.

Posted by: Notsothoreau at November 24, 2015 12:06 AM (Lqy/e)

196
It's not thermal shock if they heat together.
Taking a pan that's been in the oven and putting it on a cold cooktop
can very much crack the cooktop -- as can putting a block of ice on a
hot cooktop. But putting a room temperature pan on the heating element
and heating it with the element until the pan is hot will not. And the
trick to getting a good sear is to either have enough heating capacity
that you don't lose temperature, or having enough thermal mass so that
you don't lose temperature.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 12:05 AM (EzgxV)

But I thought I had to put the pan in the 500 degree oven first and then put the hot pan on the stovetop?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:07 AM (uZNvH)

197 It's not thermal shock if they heat together. Taking a pan that's been
in the oven and putting it on a cold cooktop can very much crack the
cooktop -- as can putting a block of ice on a hot cooktop. But putting a
room temperature pan on the heating element and heating it with the
element until the pan is hot will not. And the trick to getting a good
sear is to either have enough heating capacity that you don't lose
temperature, or having enough thermal mass so that you don't lose
temperature.

Why even pull the pan out of the oven? I heat the cast iron under the broiler for 10 minutes or so and slap a steak into it for 2 and 1/2 minutes on each side. Can't use bare hands though, and don't ask me how I know.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:09 AM (/tTDo)

198 Well it is only a day's drive

I kinda have to say yes I think although I'm a little peeved
Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:04 AM (uZNvH)

*****

My answer would be a resounding no at this stage of the game. YMMV.

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at November 24, 2015 12:09 AM (xNYi9)

199 We're talking about eggs on the ONT.
A little weird.

Posted by: L, Elle at November 24, 2015 12:09 AM (2x3L+)

200 Q: How tough are the AOS Horde Men??

A: They can remove pans from their ovens without even putting on an Ove Glove.

;-)

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:10 AM (ntObR)

201 Can't use bare hands though, and don't ask me how I know.
Posted by: dartist


Use an Ove Glove.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at November 24, 2015 12:11 AM (FkBIv)

202 "We're talking about eggs on the ONT.
A little weird."

Ok, how about goats? We could talk about goats again. That was fun the last time. Or did we wear the goats out?

Posted by: THDeering at November 24, 2015 12:11 AM (clvMJ)

203 Or goat eggs.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at November 24, 2015 12:12 AM (FkBIv)

204 Thankful for SCIENCE! ONT Compliance Pics

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/668891304881967105

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/668891443470159872

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/668891572344373253

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/668891721816793088

Posted by: kbdabear at November 24, 2015 12:12 AM (WIUBe)

205 "We're talking about eggs on the ONT.
A little weird."


Anybody else remember L'eggs pantyhose??
;-)

Posted by: qdp "leg man" steve at November 24, 2015 12:12 AM (ntObR)

206 If they are eggs suffering Jihad Syndrome - break them.

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:12 AM (7MJMR)

207 Well, the yolks on me.

Posted by: Jinx the Cat at November 24, 2015 12:12 AM (l3vZN)

208 We're talking about eggs on the ONT.
A little weird.

Posted by: L, Elle at November 24, 2015 12:09 AM (2x3L+)


It's the fault of that wench who tried to serve me runny eggs. Should I beat her some more for steering the ONT off line?

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 12:12 AM (zc3Db)

209 You want to start a gruff sex thread?

Posted by: andycanuck at November 24, 2015 12:12 AM (xodPA)

210 That was fun the last time. Or did we wear the goats out?

Posted by: THDeering at November 24, 2015 12:11 AM (clvMJ)

Is goat, not soap, not wear out.

Posted by: Jihadi at November 24, 2015 12:12 AM (T78UI)

211 I thought sure someone would say 'eff the goats' and we would be off and running.

Posted by: THDeering at November 24, 2015 12:13 AM (clvMJ)

212 >>>> Ok, how about goats? We could talk about goats again. That was fun the last time. Or did we wear the goats out?
Posted by: THDeering at November 24, 2015 12:11 AM
------
Haha. I think the Muzzies wore the goats out.

Posted by: L, Elle at November 24, 2015 12:13 AM (2x3L+)

213 If SMFH shows up, tell her am writing a script.

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:13 AM (7MJMR)

214 If they are eggs suffering Jihad Syndrome - break them.

Posted by: Anna Puma


I must break you.

Posted by: Ivan Drago at November 24, 2015 12:13 AM (9YDUz)

215 Why even pull the pan out of the oven? I heat the
cast iron under the broiler for 10 minutes or so and slap a steak into
it for 2 and 1/2 minutes on each side. Can't use bare hands though, and
don't ask me how I know.


Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:09 AM (/tTDo)

Okay so why can't I use a normal cookie sheet?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:14 AM (uZNvH)

216 We're talking about eggs on the ONT.

There are no rules on the ONT.

It's like Thunderdome, except with kitchen ranges, toast, and Shannen Doherty.

Posted by: 28th-century archaeologists will scratch their heads at November 24, 2015 12:14 AM (me1tS)

217 Thankful for SCIENCE! ONT Compliance Pics - 2

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/668892192052748288

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/668892425864261633

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/668892568281858052

https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/668892696040312833

Posted by: kbdabear at November 24, 2015 12:14 AM (WIUBe)

218 I finally catch a break!

Posted by: the chicken at November 24, 2015 12:14 AM (xodPA)

219 kbdabear thank you for science babes

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:15 AM (uZNvH)

220 It may seem to untrained eyes, that chemjeff isn't much of a cook but I predict he will be the first moron to come out with a best selling AOSHQ cook book.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:15 AM (/tTDo)

221 Prince Charles The Imbecile In Waiting is a perfect example of why cousin fucking over a few centuries is a baaaaad idea.

See also Muslims, inbreeding.

Posted by: GnuBreed at November 24, 2015 12:16 AM (gyKtp)

222 I came out with a cookbook of my fave recipes once. Unfortunately all the copies were seized by the FDA.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:16 AM (ntObR)

223 220
It may seem to untrained eyes, that chemjeff isn't much of a cook but I
predict he will be the first moron to come out with a best selling AOSHQ
cook book.


Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:15 AM (/tTDo)


Before CBD? oh I sincerely doubt that

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:16 AM (uZNvH)

224 The Helen Keller Cookbook???

Posted by: andycanuck at November 24, 2015 12:16 AM (xodPA)

225 Okay so why can't I use a normal cookie sheet?

Because it won't get as hot as a cast iron pan under the broiler without fucking it up.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:17 AM (/tTDo)

226 So, lent an addict 500 a couple of weeks ago.

This won't end well.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 24, 2015 12:17 AM (9jeGC)

227 I really have no idea what we're talking about now. I think eggs or goats or the muzzies or rough sex.

Who is responsible for this confluence of subjects?

Posted by: L, Elle at November 24, 2015 12:18 AM (2x3L+)

228 Q: Which came first, the Chicken or the Egg?

A: Don't know offhand, but I'd kind of watch to see who rolls over first to light a cigarette?



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at November 24, 2015 12:18 AM (McRlu)

229 225
Okay so why can't I use a normal cookie sheet?

Because it won't get as hot as a cast iron pan under the broiler without fucking it up.


Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:17 AM (/tTDo)

Even if I set the oven to 500?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:19 AM (uZNvH)

230 So, lent an addict 500 a couple of weeks ago.

This won't end well.
Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 24, 2015 12:17 AM (9jeGC)




iyou never lend an addict money unless you also get them to agree to wear a gopro until they return the money. you will more than make your money back on the vids.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 24, 2015 12:19 AM (vb33c)

231 226
So, lent an addict 500 a couple of weeks ago.



This won't end well.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 24, 2015 12:17 AM (9jeGC)


Lending money to an addict is basically making a donation to their suppliers. Never do that. Even if they're family.

Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at November 24, 2015 12:19 AM (HalrA)

232 The Helen Keller Cookbook???


Posted by: andycanuck

She burned her fingers trying to read a waffle iron.

Posted by: Bossy Conservative...a rube in America at November 24, 2015 12:20 AM (+1T7c)

233 So, lent an addict 500 a couple of weeks ago.



This won't end well.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 24, 2015 12:17 AM (9jeGC)


I am so sorry

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:20 AM (uZNvH)

234 Test.

Stupid blog.

Posted by: L, Elle at November 24, 2015 12:20 AM (2x3L+)

235 Heat shock.

What retired people from the north do getting to their car in the summer when they move to Arizona? Vs The cold shock in the winter they do now in the winter?

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 12:20 AM (wHX4r)

236 So, for Arbalest when he gets here -- here's why I
don't think it's his ignition key switch -- https://youtu.be/UAREADz7BMA
(first two minutes). Here's the vid that finally told me where the
damned PGM-FI thing was -- https://youtu.be/38DQ5IVQQ68 .





Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (EzgxV)


So, did the Chariot of the Elder God get fixed?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 12:21 AM (7MWCL)

237
See also Muslims, inbreeding.
--

The classy thing to say is "consanguinity"

Posted by: shibumi who is awash in existential dread at November 24, 2015 12:21 AM (9JJgN)

238 Even if I set the oven to 500?

Posted by: chemjeff


Just remember many ovens start to smoke at about 500. So get ready to open the winder's and der's. Also clean the oven before hand with vinegar and good scrub sponge.

Posted by: Ivan Drago at November 24, 2015 12:21 AM (9YDUz)

239 Cookbooks previously published by AOS readers:

"I Love the Smell of Napalm in the Morning: The Apocalypse Now Cookbook"

"Wrap Your Wife in Bacon the Easy Way"

"How to Smoke Meat with a Flamethrower"

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:23 AM (ntObR)

240 I'm liking the music choices in Fargo tonight.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 12:23 AM (wHX4r)

241 I did catch a poacher in my son's tree stand. He was trying to make himself very skinny to hide behind the trunk.

Welll.....

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 12:23 AM (rjtGa)

242 @L,Elle. Medium soft boiled eggs: have your eggs at room temperature, that's key. Place into boiling water for 6 minutes. Then put directly into an ice water bath for a couple minutes, and peel. Perfect everytime. Of course you have to think ahead so they're at room temp.

Posted by: keena at November 24, 2015 12:25 AM (RiTnx)

243 The classy thing to say is "consanguinity"


Posted by: shibumi who is awash in existential dread

Flashing your "know -it-all" education I see.

No wonder your clients are mad. Show off.

Posted by: Bossy Conservative...a rube in America at November 24, 2015 12:25 AM (+1T7c)

244 193 Anyway I thought I might practice cooking a ribeye steak

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:05 AM (uZNvH)




Some people swear by ribeyes, but I'm the sort that trims out fat and they tend to be a lot of work to eat. http://www.trollvstroll.com/ribeye/ribeye-steak/



Top sirloins or New York (AKA top loin) steaks are much easier to deal with -- http://www.quia.com/files/quia/users/ dstraube/MeatCDE/BeefMeatCuts /Loin_Top_Sirloin_Steak,_Bnls_2.jpg .

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 12:25 AM (EzgxV)

245 Okay so why can't I use a normal cookie sheet?

Because it won't get as hot as a cast iron pan under the broiler without fucking it up.




Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:17 AM (/tTDo)
Even if I set the oven to 500?


Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:19 AM (uZNvH)

No thermal mass. You want a big chunk of metal with a high heat capacity.A cast iron pan or griddle heated up to 500 in the oven will do it. You can get either with cast in grills too if you like the lines seared in like the steak was grilled. You don't want to use it on a glass stove top because you'll scratch the stove top.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 12:25 AM (T78UI)

246 $500 RWC?

There are many Moron writers who really could use that kind of moolah to hire an editor or a cover artist.

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:25 AM (7MJMR)

247 Even if I set the oven to 500?

What do you think I am, a chemist? Just kiddin man. I think the broiler from above gets hotter than 500. I use one of those Lodge pans with ribs in it and pre heat the hell out of it on the highest shelf. I'm sure there are a million ways to do it but that works for me. Then there is the salt technique.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:26 AM (/tTDo)

248 L, Elle...

Whatever you're testing try Chrome.

This site is a bitch with pretty much anything else I've tried.

Pixy hates everything.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 12:26 AM (rjtGa)

249 >>>Cookbooks previously published by AOS readers:

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:23 AM (ntObR)<<<




"Better Hobos and Gardens Cookbook"

Posted by: Moron gourmand at November 24, 2015 12:26 AM (REdlt)

250 From a Drudge headline: Head cheerleader is banned for a silly tweet. The article says that this is what got her pom-poms taken away:

"When only 10 percent of Revere votes for mayor cause the other 90 percent isn't legal," Godino said in the tweet.

I don't see what could possibly be wrong with that (other than confusing eligible voters and illegals ... but it's the thought that counts, really). That article continues,

But after other students complained, the school stepped in. Revere Superintendent Dianne Kelly says the district believes in freedom of speech, but cannot support what she calls insensitive language.

WTFFFFFF?!?! These administrators REALLY need to start feeling some serious sort of punishment for their tuyrannical, retarded insanity. Either they need to lose their jobs and be left on the streets, eating out of trash cans ... or informally run out of town on a rail, or something. They never suffer for their abuse and stupidity, even when the student is finally freed from their insane sanctions. They have to be made to suffer. Really.
*shaking head in dismay*

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 12:26 AM (zc3Db)

251 Can you cook a rib-eye with a phased plasma rifle in the 40W range?

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:27 AM (7MJMR)

252 So how do I cook a ribeye with a glass top stove and no cast iron pan?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:27 AM (uZNvH)

253 196
It's not thermal shock if they heat together.
Taking a pan that's been in the oven and putting it on a cold cooktop
can very much crack the cooktop -- as can putting a block of ice on a
hot cooktop. But putting a room temperature pan on the heating element
and heating it with the element until the pan is hot will not. And the
trick to getting a good sear is to either have enough heating capacity
that you don't lose temperature, or having enough thermal mass so that
you don't lose temperature.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 12:05 AM (EzgxV)
But I thought I had to put the pan in the 500 degree oven first and then put the hot pan on the stovetop?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:07 AM (uZNvH)




If your cooktop can get it to 500 degrees, why even turn the oven on? If your cooktop can't get it to 500 degrees, why even bother with the cooktop? -- see dartist @197.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 12:27 AM (EzgxV)

254 Moron gourmand, shoulda thought of that one. ;-)

"Hobo: The *Other* Other White Meat"

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:28 AM (ntObR)

255 "Getting a Great Sandwich: Understanding Positive and Negative Incentives"

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at November 24, 2015 12:28 AM (RU5ki)

256
If your cooktop can get it to 500 degrees, why
even turn the oven on? If your cooktop can't get it to 500 degrees, why
even bother with the cooktop? -- see dartist @197.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 12:27 AM (EzgxV)

I don't know, I thought the recipe called for putting the pan in the 500 degree oven then taking it out and putting it on the stove and cooking the steak in it and then putting it back in the oven
is that wrong?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:29 AM (uZNvH)

257 Can you cook a rib-eye with a phased plasma rifle in the 40W range?>>>

It cooks fine but kinda crappy eating.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 12:29 AM (wHX4r)

258 So how do I cook a ribeye with a glass top stove and no cast iron pan?

Dude. WTF?

You broil a steak. C'mon now.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 12:30 AM (rjtGa)

259 "The Joy of Roasting Democrats on a Spit"

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:30 AM (ntObR)

260 I listened to the Mark Steyn music video. All the way to the end, due to a certain person's suggestion that I do so.

I used to wish I could sing. After the video, I wish that Mark could.

Posted by: GnuBreed at November 24, 2015 12:30 AM (gyKtp)

261 Speaking of characters written out... whatever happened to Spearchucker Jones in M*A*S*H? His name alone should have kept him a role for the duration of the series, maybe even a spinoff.
Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 23, 2015 11:22 PM

Now that made me laugh. I remember the character. Try naming a character that today!

Posted by: Farmer at November 24, 2015 12:30 AM (o/90i)

262 She burned her fingers trying to read a waffle iron.
Subtitled Cooking for Dumbies.

Posted by: andycanuck at November 24, 2015 12:30 AM (xodPA)

263 So how do I cook a ribeye with a glass top stove and no cast iron pan?


Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:27 AM (uZNvH)

Heavy aluminum black anodized pan. Shop around you should find one about 1/4" thick.Sam's Club, other shopping clubs, food service outlets (Gordan's is one) will sell the same stuff restaurants use by the piece.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 12:31 AM (T78UI)

264
So how do I cook a ribeye with a glass top stove and no cast iron pan?>>>

Over a fucking fire outside like meat was meant to be cooked.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 12:32 AM (wHX4r)

265 So how do I cook a ribeye with a glass top stove and no cast iron pan?

Do you have stainless steel pans? It may be time to visit a resale shop for old, smooth cast iron.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:32 AM (/tTDo)

266 So how do I cook a ribeye with a glass top stove and no cast iron pan?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:27 AM (uZNvH)


Just turn the burner on, throw your rib-eye in and flip it a few times as you check to see how done it is. Use medium heat and you can't go wrong.

It ain't rocket science, jeff ... just a slab of meat.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 12:32 AM (zc3Db)

267 246 $500 RWC?

There are many Moron writers who really could use that kind of moolah to hire an editor or a cover artist.

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:25 AM (7MJMR)

Shameless . Post the link to the horde authors again.
Christmas shopping.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 24, 2015 12:32 AM (9jeGC)

268 Willy J., talk about going paleo. :-)

Another super old-fashioned recipe:

Meat. Sun. Rock. Some assembly required.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:33 AM (ntObR)

269 Over a fucking fire outside like meat was meant to be cooked.

Also a good idea.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:33 AM (/tTDo)

270
Mmm, cooking thread/ONT!

Only at the HQ. Never know if we'll be dissecting the forensic intricacies of finding deleted top secret emails, re-fighting Iraq, diagnosing auto repair issues, or mastering poached eggs.

Damn, I'm almost hungry now.

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 12:33 AM (QDnY+)

271 Over a fucking fire outside like meat was meant to be cooked.

--------

Ogg know never to use fucking fire for cooking.

Posted by: Ogg at November 24, 2015 12:33 AM (RU5ki)

272 "Cooking With the E-wok: Ace's Electrifying Chinese Cuisine"

Posted by: Moron gourmand at November 24, 2015 12:34 AM (REdlt)

273 >> So how do I cook a ribeye with a glass top stove and no cast iron pan?

Bunsen burner. All the finest chemists cook that way.

Posted by: GnuBreed at November 24, 2015 12:34 AM (gyKtp)

274 229 225
Okay so why can't I use a normal cookie sheet?

Because it won't get as hot as a cast iron pan under the broiler without fucking it up.


Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:17 AM (/tTDo)
Even if I set the oven to 500?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:19 AM (uZNvH)



The broiler acts like an upside-down barbecue -- all the heat is at the top. The differential heating in your cookie sheet would have it warp, badly. You're talking about using the oven at 500, which heats the whole oven. The sort of thing I might do is to cook beef with the whole oven at 500, and on a cookie sheet, but on a little rack so it doesn't wallow around in its juices -- but that's a different method than what dartist is talking about, it's more like a roast.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 12:34 AM (EzgxV)

275 So how do I cook a ribeye with a glass top stove and no cast iron pan?

Walk him and pitch to the rhino.

Posted by: always a good suggestion at November 24, 2015 12:34 AM (me1tS)

276 I like how Jay Thomas got fired from Cheers for saying he got combat pay for kissing Carla. LOL!

Posted by: keena at November 24, 2015 12:35 AM (RiTnx)

277 Another super old-fashioned recipe:

Meat. Sun. Rock. Some assembly required.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:33 AM (ntObR)


There's also the meat-saddle method popular with the Mongols. You not only prepare your meat but it provides you cushioned riding, too.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 12:35 AM (zc3Db)

278 Note to motorists:

It is illegal to "split" lanes in Arizona.

More so if you're approaching a red light.

Triply so when you're not riding a motorcycle, but are instead driving a late model Chevy Impala.

That is all.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 24, 2015 12:35 AM (YJmuy)

279 keena, true except that Jay Thomas has since proven himself a really hateful loudmouth liberal.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:36 AM (ntObR)

280 Do not try fucking fire!

Posted by: Mogg the Heavily Singed at November 24, 2015 12:36 AM (me1tS)

281 I liked the Damon Wayans getting fired anecdote too. Well done, Mr Wayans! Kick them in the balls.

Posted by: andycanuck at November 24, 2015 12:36 AM (xodPA)

282 Primordial, I imagine that recipe provided some interesting marination as well. :-P

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:36 AM (ntObR)

283 qdpsteve, sure but in the context of the show, that's funny.

Posted by: keena at November 24, 2015 12:36 AM (RiTnx)

284 There is also the Korea method - super fricken hot rock meets meat.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 12:37 AM (T78UI)

285 Just turn the burner on, throw your rib-eye in and
flip it a few times as you check to see how done it is. Use medium heat
and you can't go wrong.



It ain't rocket science, jeff ... just a slab of meat.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 12:32 AM (zc3Db)

Well I don't want to waste expensive meat nor set my kitchen on fire nor destroy my range, that is why I ask

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:37 AM (uZNvH)

286 So how do I cook a ribeye with a glass top stove and no cast iron pan?
Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:27 AM (uZNvH)

*****

On a grill, outside of the kitchen. Good grief.

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at November 24, 2015 12:38 AM (xNYi9)

287 236 So, for Arbalest when he gets here -- here's why I
don't think it's his ignition key switch -- https://youtu.be/UAREADz7BMA
(first two minutes). Here's the vid that finally told me where the
damned PGM-FI thing was -- https://youtu.be/38DQ5IVQQ68 .





Posted by: cthulhu at November 23, 2015 11:27 PM (EzgxV)


So, did the Chariot of the Elder God get fixed?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 12:21 AM (7MWCL) ....maybe.....



The fiancee picked up the parts on the way home from work (after dark). I was going to change one out first thing tomorrow, but she said that it's supposed to rain. Being that getting to the damned part involves wallowing around with my knee on the street and my head twisted around by the gas pedal, which doesn't sound too fun in the rain, I ran out and plugged in the part.



There are too many tools and dash parts all over the front seat to do anything else right now, but I will be able to check to see if it's fixed tomorrow.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 12:38 AM (EzgxV)

288 Look just put the butter in the pan at medium and crack the eggs in the pan 45 seconds later voila delicious fried eggs.
No cups no boiling no confusion nothing.
Posted by: eleven at November 23, 2015 11:43 PM

Damn you, now I'm gonna hafta make fried eggs before I go to bed.

Posted by: Farmer at November 24, 2015 12:38 AM (o/90i)

289 Burnt, I've read that really high-end kitchens these days actually have what could effectively be called stone-topped skillets.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:38 AM (ntObR)

290 Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 24, 2015 12:17 AM (9jeGC)

I am so sorry
Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:20 AM (uZNvH)

Don't be. My stupidity. Thought he turned his life around. Apparently not.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 24, 2015 12:38 AM (9jeGC)

291 Later, taters.

Posted by: andycanuck at November 24, 2015 12:39 AM (xodPA)

292 Actually Ogg did use fire for cooking. And herbs and spices and everything.

And cavemen don't live in caves anymore because they invented houses.

And then farms and then electricity and then air conditioning and indoor plumbing and Lady Propane.

And the internet. Cavemen were pretty clever that way.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 12:39 AM (rjtGa)

293 1. Christopher Taylor's book.

http://astore.amazon.com/aoshq-20/detail/B014TKK4RU

2. Muldoon's.

http://astore.amazon.com/aoshq-20/detail/B017AKV03I

3. Lauren's story.

http://astore.amazon.com/aoshq-20/detail/B00PRBME38

4. Logprof's novella.

http://astore.amazon.com/aoshq-20/detail/B014EKK5CO

5. And my book.

http://astore.amazon.com/aoshq-20/detail/B014BTSEYO

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:40 AM (7MJMR)

294 Muslims invented fire.

Posted by: NASA at November 24, 2015 12:40 AM (RU5ki)

295 Anna, thanks for that handy resource.

Hope to join the list someday, we'll see I guess.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:40 AM (ntObR)

296 Look just put the butter in the pan at medium and crack the eggs in the pan 45 seconds later voila delicious fried eggs.

No cups no boiling no confusion nothing.

Bacon, what about the bacon for God's sake?

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:41 AM (/tTDo)

297 Being that getting to the damned part involves wallowing around with my knee on the street and my head twisted around by the gas pedal, which
doesn't sound too fun in the rain, I ran out and plugged in the part.


Dude, nothing lasts forever, not even cold November rain.

Posted by: Axl Rose at November 24, 2015 12:41 AM (me1tS)

298 Electrifying or Eclectic?

See the Ewok and decide.

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:41 AM (7MJMR)

299 Chem,

You can probably buy a charcoal hibachi grill at walmart for like $20. With charcoal you can get great heat, enough to do a couple of steaks at a time.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 12:42 AM (9YDUz)

300 Happy-ish Monday Evening, all y'all -

Posted by: Adriane the Medical Critic ... at November 24, 2015 12:42 AM (jnAIZ)

301 Well I don't want to waste expensive meat

You'll have to excuse me. I treat all meat like same. To me, it's all just meat. I don't like it prepared in any fancy way, just cooked well - very well.

nor set my kitchen on fire nor destroy my range, that is why I ask

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:37 AM (uZNvH)


I have never set a kitchen on fire nor destroyed any ranges. I'm not even sure how one would go about doing either.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 12:42 AM (zc3Db)

302 qdpsteve, well have now written 11 pages of script. Just about 80 to 100 more pages. And will have a movie.

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:42 AM (7MJMR)

303
Well since I thinkthat *alone* among idiotic and unconstitutional ideas, the gun control ones in Congress stand no chance, not gonna fret too much about Schumer's latest stupid stunt, or Teh Donald's "position" on it (which would be unlikely to survive one meeting with knowledgeable people).

On the other hand, the oven died recently (well, probably a $3 part in the control board/ERC died, but as it's 25 years old, the very savvy old salt at the appliance component place told me I was out of luck). So appliance wisdom is suddenly useful.

Features, shmeatures. An oven (double oven actually) that does what the old did would be fine. Never used the convection - though maybe I should have - in any case they all come with some sort of convection now, it seems. Rolling racks on the bottom - nice, will like it, but whatever.

Service life and quality are really all that matter. So any brand advice? Worth it to spend more for Dacor, vs. KitchenAid? Or is even KitchenAid not worth the price?

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 12:42 AM (QDnY+)

304 In the end you can achieve a decent steak with sub par equipment but it will take longer. Get the aluminum pan smoking hot on the glass top stove. Drop the steak to sear. Pull the steak back off. Get the pan smokin hot again to sear other side. And cook to rare.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 12:42 AM (wHX4r)

305 keena, true except that Jay Thomas has since proven himself a really hateful loudmouth liberal.


Posted by: qdpsteve

Jay Thomas, Rhea Perlman, and a host of others.

Really, you can't swing a cat in Hollywood without hitting some know-it-all actor who is a loudmouth a-hole.

Posted by: Bossy Conservative...a rube in America at November 24, 2015 12:42 AM (+1T7c)

306 Moron Gourmand, also a good addition. :-)

And of course, don't forget that your handy dandy .45 is a pro at turning your leftover mozzarella or jack cheese into Swiss. Dare your dining guests to tell the difference!! ;-)

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:43 AM (ntObR)

307 Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:40 AM (7MJMR

Thanks.

*opens wallet..


Yeah, thanks.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 24, 2015 12:43 AM (9jeGC)

308 Anna, please keep me posted. :-)

And btw, just watched "Ex Machina" last night. Was considerably better than I expected it to be.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:44 AM (ntObR)

309 RWC, if you clicked on my nic. GoFundMe is also available.... *grin*

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:44 AM (7MJMR)

310 Bossy, true.

REALLY hoping Adele doesn't suddenly have to say something nasty about Sarah Palin to save her career.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:44 AM (ntObR)

311 Watch Appleseed XIII. Just ignore the sometimes bad computer animation. And let me know what you think.

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:45 AM (7MJMR)

312 Kitchen AIDS?

Is that what happened to Charlie Sheen?

Posted by: Bossy Conservative...a rube in America at November 24, 2015 12:46 AM (+1T7c)

313 Bacon, what about the bacon for God's sake?

The bacon just comes with the eggs.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 12:46 AM (rjtGa)

314 304
In the end you can achieve a decent steak with sub par equipment but it
will take longer. Get the aluminum pan smoking hot on the glass top
stove. Drop the steak to sear. Pull the steak back off. Get the pan
smokin hot again to sear other side. And cook to rare.


Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 12:42 AM (wHX4r)

Okay I think this is closer to my abilities. What do you mean by "smoking hot" and how can I cook to something more than rare

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:46 AM (uZNvH)

315
Muslims invented fire.

Posted by: NASA at November 24, 2015 12:40 AM (RU5ki)


Kind of tough to burn libraries without it.

And speaking of steaks; just finished eating a steak of some kind (forgot to read the label, sirloin, I think) cooked on the propane grill, along with a baked potato that had been pre-nuked in the microwave for 6 minutes. Both turned out pretty well. Salad beforehand, too. Weather has become cold, with a brisk North wind supplanting the wild (but warm) Chinook wind out of the West. A little snow has fallen, less than a quarter-inch. Seasonable weather for the Peace Country.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 12:46 AM (7MWCL)

316 299 Chem,
You can probably buy a charcoal hibachi grill at walmart for like $20. With charcoal you can get great heat, enough to do a couple of steaks at a time.

-------

Yeah, if you don't have an outdoor cooking complex with a 48" stainless grill and smoker and full complement of appliances, one of those $20 hibachi thingies might work.

Posted by: Mr. Poo Poo at November 24, 2015 12:46 AM (RU5ki)

317 >>>See the Ewok and decide.


Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:41 AM (7MJMR)<<<

I'm mad that once again the white man stole from my people, ripping off our "Pow Wow Chow" cookbook and creating one titled "Yub Nub Grub"

Posted by: Lieawatha Warren at November 24, 2015 12:47 AM (REdlt)

318 Mmm, cooking thread/ONT!
Only at the HQ. Never know if we'll be dissecting the forensic intricacies of finding deleted top secret emails, re-fighting Iraq, diagnosing auto repair issues, or mastering poached eggs.
Damn, I'm almost hungry now.
Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 12:33 AM

Rhomboid you say a lot of what I've been thinking. You reading muh mind?

Posted by: Farmer at November 24, 2015 12:47 AM (o/90i)

319 Kitchen AIDS - When Charlie Sheen fails to properly apply the Aunt Jemimah Treatment?

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:47 AM (7MJMR)

320 Also, cooking is like anything in life, you have to fail a certain amount to get it right.

So practice on cheap cuts like london broil, hanger steak, or tri-tip (if on sale).

Those cuts only need to be brought up to near-room temperature and seared almost to charring and they are done.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 12:47 AM (9YDUz)

321 Will this pan work on a glass top stove?

http://tinyurl.com/nwuxe6g

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:47 AM (uZNvH)

322 The Ex Machina chick looked more voluptuous in her robo-suit than in the altogether.

Posted by: Hollywood's lies at November 24, 2015 12:47 AM (me1tS)

323 F it. iPad is wonky as hell. I'll order the books tomorrow.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 24, 2015 12:47 AM (9jeGC)

324 Well I don't want to waste expensive meat nor set my kitchen on fire nor destroy my range, that is why I ask


Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:37 AM (uZNvH)

Do yo have a proper exhaust hood over your stove? Say, 600 cfm, not those 'builder special' 150- cfm pieces of crap that blow air in your face, one that actually sends the smoke and fumes outside? If you do, fire no problem, just keep a bucket of baking soda or an extinguisher (ABC type) nearby. As a sidenote - I put a 1200 cfm exhaust in my last house, still need to update this one to gas this winter and get a serious exhaust hood...
Don't worry the 'thermal stress' on your glasstop. It can handle moving a scorching hot pan on one burner to a dead cold burner no problem. I'd worry more about scratching it with rough cast iron (though the hardness of modern glasstops may exceed cast iron these days).Getting a heavy cast iron pan and heating it to 500 in the oven is probably the best way if you get rained out and cannot use your outdoor grill. A heavy aluminum pan on the stovetop is the other way, but I don't go that way. Some of the steak houses do broil, but they may be at 1000 F. Not going to get there at home.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 12:47 AM (T78UI)

325 Anna, whatever you do, NEVER ask Charlie Sheen to "stuff your turkey."

I learned the hard way...

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:48 AM (ntObR)

326 You'll have to excuse me. I treat all meat like same. To me, it's all just meat. I don't like it prepared in any fancy way, just cooked well - very well.


For the love of the god of steak ignore everything this person just said.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 12:49 AM (rjtGa)

327 Hollywood's lies, yup.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:49 AM (ntObR)

328 Anna, whatever you do, NEVER ask Charlie Sheen to "stuff your turkey."

I learned the hard way...


He gave you the bird and now you have chirpees?

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 24, 2015 12:49 AM (YJmuy)

329 Burnt, I've read that really high-end kitchens these days actually have what could effectively be called stone-topped skillets.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:38 AM (ntObR)
I have had that in two houses, gas range center burner, never used them.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 12:49 AM (T78UI)

330 chemjeff, the only time I knew of a kitchen fire happened about this time of year when I lived in an apartment.

Downstairs neighbor returned from Christmas shopping. Put a pot of water to boil on the electric stove. Took a phone call. Fell asleep. And at 3am the stove top was afire and she was freaking.

Luckily it was only the stove area that was scorched.

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:50 AM (7MJMR)

331 Yeah, if you don't have an outdoor cooking complex with a 48" stainless grill and smoker and full complement of appliances, one of those $20 hibachi thingies might work.
Posted by: Mr. Poo Poo


Rather, Mr. Hawaiian Dress would never cook anything by hand. That's what servants are for, my dear.
*beats gimp with Holland and Holland shotgun butt*

Posted by: Mr. Hawaiian Dress at November 24, 2015 12:50 AM (9YDUz)

332 Blanco, bird flu.

*ba-dum-bump*

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:51 AM (ntObR)

333 Burnt Toast, you seem like a guy fairly learned in the ways of cooking technology. Any recommendations, stern warnings, or rumors on best wall oven brands? Medium-high end (not Wolf or Viking).

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 12:52 AM (QDnY+)

334 326 You'll have to excuse me. I treat all meat like same. To me, it's all just meat.

-----------

Yup. After a while, it all tastes the same.

Posted by: Charlie Sheen at November 24, 2015 12:52 AM (RU5ki)

335 Thanks for the laughs. Back to writing. Maybe the NaNoWriMo story supposed to be working on.

Have a good evening.

And RWC, thank you.

Posted by: Anna Puma at November 24, 2015 12:52 AM (7MJMR)

336 good luck Anna Puma
let me know when you are done and I can share my story idea with you

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:53 AM (uZNvH)

337 Thanks eleven and keena. Good advice. That I will follow.

Posted by: L, Elle at November 24, 2015 12:54 AM (2x3L+)

338 Will this pan work on a glass top stove?

http://tinyurl.com/nwuxe6g


Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:47 AM (uZNvH)


I am sure it would. Here is a possibly stupid idea: if you have a solid glass (Pyrex) cooktop, why bother with a pan to cook a steak? Just melt a little butter onto the cooktop, and fry your steak right on the Pyrex. After all, you used to be able to buy Pyrex cookware. My mother had some.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 12:54 AM (7MWCL)

339 I am sorry. I am just very insecure about cooking, especially cooking expensive things. I don't mind trying different pasta casseroles because it's just pasta but cooking meat is different, it is expensive and I am very bad at it other than ground beef. so my apologies

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:54 AM (uZNvH)

340 Heh. Re the Starbucks barista misspelling your name to make points.

I am in a Starbucks maybe once a month. Not more, really. I can see why someone at HQ did the name-on-cup thing. It's more personal than a number, better than at MickeyD's when they yell out FOUR EIGHTY SIX!!!!!

But I can see the occasional wise-ass hipster douchebag grinds-worker looking to riff on your name just to needle the old dude.

Which is why, if I am asked, I say "One." Eyebrows go up, and I say, "Yeah, One," and hold up one finger. I don't care if they spell it Oh-Enn-EE on the cup or just the number 1. They really can't fuck it up, and what has happened, is that I fucked with them, rather than let them fuck with me.

They might think that I'm a douche for doing this, and they probably do, but they have NEVER said, "Hey, that's not really your name, izzit?"

So many weird names for people today, hey, they've learned not to question it, but accept.

Whatever.

Posted by: the littl shyning man at November 24, 2015 12:54 AM (U6f54)

341 Note to motorists:
It is illegal to "split" lanes in Arizona.
More so if you're approaching a red light.
Triply so when you're not riding a motorcycle, but are instead driving a late model Chevy Impala.
That is all.
Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 24, 2015 12:35

TY for the tips on AZ driving laws, we visit her folks there.

*psst, what happened? It'll only be between us.*

Posted by: Farmer at November 24, 2015 12:55 AM (o/90i)

342 What do you mean by "smoking hot"

Just follow some of kbdabear's links ...

Posted by: Adriane the Ethnic Cuisine Critic ... at November 24, 2015 12:56 AM (jnAIZ)

343
I am sure it would. Here is a possibly stupid
idea: if you have a solid glass (Pyrex) cooktop, why bother with a pan
to cook a steak? Just melt a little butter onto the cooktop, and fry
your steak right on the Pyrex. After all, you used to be able to buy
Pyrex cookware. My mother had some.


Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 12:54 AM (7MWCL)

so should I get one of those aluminum pans and fry a ribeye steak with butter on my glass top stove?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:57 AM (uZNvH)

344 Will this pan work on a glass top stove?

http://tinyurl.com/nwuxe6g


Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:47 AM (uZNvH)

Yes, Kolh's is actually pretty good for mostly clothes store. You might find a heavier pan at a lower price if you go to the store. Personally, I'd go the flatter pan they had on the same page (at least the page that opened for me).

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 12:57 AM (T78UI)

345 Kohl's is the new Mervyns.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 12:59 AM (ntObR)

346 No cups no boiling no confusion nothing.

Bacon, what about the bacon for God's sake?
Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 12:41 AM

Oh F*@# dartist. Now I'm have to cook bacon w/ my fried eggs! And we've got some great thick bacon from our trip back thru MO.

Posted by: Farmer at November 24, 2015 01:01 AM (o/90i)

347 Okay I think this is closer to my abilities. What do you mean by "smoking hot" and how can I cook to something more than rare>>>

To go from rare spend more time on the first smoking hot run. And this will be totally dependent on thickness. ~1" run 4 minutes first burn wait till pan gets hot again and 2 minutes second burn.

Running 4 minutes first burn will take away from crispiness/char on the first side slightly.

And smoking hot is where you cant hold your hand 4" from the surface of the pan far more than a couple seconds.

If you mix it up some and remove and repeat flipping one more time after getting to smoking hot you kinda regain the char on the first side.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 01:01 AM (wHX4r)

348 Just melt a little butter onto the cooktop, and fry
your steak right on the Pyrex. After all, you used to be able to buy Pyrex cookware. My mother had some.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon


Except it may not be level and any juices or oil will slide off into the sides of the unit and generally fuck things up.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 01:01 AM (9YDUz)

349 *psst, what happened? It'll only be between us.*

Freakazoid did just what I posted to a friend.

I ended having to play rescue ranger and shuttle said friend and child around a bit this afternoon, as her little Scion xB appears to have at least a bent rear axle and crushed rear quarter panel.

She's hoping to get the car back, I'm thinking with a bent rear axle on that cheap little econobox its probably a total loss.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 24, 2015 01:02 AM (YJmuy)

350 292 Actually Ogg did use fire for cooking. And herbs and spices and everything.

And cavemen don't live in caves anymore because they invented houses.

And then farms and then electricity and then air conditioning and indoor plumbing and Lady Propane.

And the internet. Cavemen were pretty clever that way.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 12:39 AM (rjtGa)



But still laugh when their buddies take a shot in the nuts.

Posted by: buzzion at November 24, 2015 01:02 AM (zt+N6)

351 17 Backstories To Why Actors And Actresses Were Written Out Of TV Shows

If I was hell-bent on hitting crazy, Shannen Doherty would be in the top five.

Posted by: rickl at November 24, 2015 01:03 AM (sdi6R)

352 Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 12:54 AM (7MWCL)
so should I get one of those aluminum pans and fry a ribeye steak with butter on my glass top stove?


Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:57 AM (uZNvH)

At home, I am without a range right now, waiting to put a gas range in, so my meat cooking is limited to the gas grill, and a Teflon-coated aluminum skillet on a 120 volt electric hot plate. Normally, I use the grill, but if the wind is howling, as it tends to do in Alberta, you can't cook for shit on it. So the steak goes in the skillet on the hot plate. And it tastes just fine, too. Butter, of course. If a coated aluminum skillet works fine on the little hot plate, it will work fine on your Pyrex cooktop.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 01:03 AM (7MWCL)

353 Willy J that is too subjective. OMFG how can I cook a steak

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:03 AM (uZNvH)

354 so should I get one of those aluminum pans and fry a ribeye steak with butter on my glass top stove?
Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:57 AM (uZNvH)

*****

No, damnit. Get a little Smokey Joe Weber grill and cook the damn thing over fire, as meat was intended to be prepared.

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at November 24, 2015 01:04 AM (xNYi9)

355 Burnt Toast, you seem like a guy fairly learned in
the ways of cooking technology. Any recommendations, stern warnings, or
rumors on best wall oven brands? Medium-high end (not Wolf or Viking).

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 12:52 AM (QDnY+)

Honestly, never had looked into wall ovens. I have thrown some money at relatively expensive exhausts because I want to be able make the most out of my otherwise modest kitchen space. I have worked as baker and cook in previous lives, and built a few commercial kitchens in this life, never saw a use for wall ovens. Mostly a residential thing, probably a must if one has a bad back.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 01:05 AM (T78UI)

356 They might think that I'm a douche for doing this, and they probably do, but they have NEVER said, "Hey, that's not really your name, izzit?"

So many weird names for people today, hey, they've learned not to question it, but accept.

Whatever.
Posted by: the littl shyning man


I have a friend who used to say a male pr0n actor's name just to see if people started laughing when it was called out.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 01:05 AM (9YDUz)

357 256
If your cooktop can get it to 500 degrees, why
even turn the oven on? If your cooktop can't get it to 500 degrees, why
even bother with the cooktop? -- see dartist @197.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 12:27 AM (EzgxV)
I don't know, I thought the recipe called for putting the pan in the 500 degree oven then taking it out and putting it on the stove and cooking the steak in it and then putting it back in the oven
is that wrong?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:29 AM (uZNvH)



OK, so here's the deal -- with a steak, you want to rapidly heat the outside to an extreme level to get a "sear" -- my mom, who was in serious contention for The World's Worst Cook, would consistently serve steak that was just grey. No sear at all. And grey all the way through, as well. And chewy. I never knew people would actually look forward to having steak until I went away to college.



To continue -- the inside need not be heated to such an extent -- if you like steak "medium", it should be pink but warm.




To get that combination, extreme heat needs to be brought to the steak's surface. With a broiler, this means exposing the meat to flame or very hot heating elements from about 2" away. When you use a broiler, it typically doesn't have a temperature setting as such. When you pan-fry, you want a very hot pan touching the steak and not being cooled down by contact. This means that the pan must either have some thermal mass (like cast iron), or have some serious heating on its other side (I've got a 12,000 BTU burner on my cooktop -- I can pan-fry in cheap Walmart skillets). You can actually get nearly the same effect if an oven is about 500 degrees and the steak is exposed to that temperature on all sides (as in a convection oven). But broiling and pan-frying give a better sear because they are heating the surface to *more* than 500 degrees.



Your recipe is trying to be too tricky. It's trying to get double-duty out of the oven by having it pre-heat the pan as it pre-heats the oven. You are correct to note that this risks cracking the cooktop in the process. And if you're not using something with some thermal mass, you're just wasting your time. (BTW, thermal mass is largely correlated with regular mass -- do you own a skillet with some heft that isn't cast-iron?) Furthermore, you can't really use a plastic-handled skillet under a broiler.



I'm thinking that the recipe you have is wrong for you and the equipment you have.




Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 01:05 AM (EzgxV)

358 But still laugh when their buddies take a shot in the nuts.

Some truths are universal.

Posted by: the SJWs at google are wanking themselves silly over austrolopithecus, for some reason at November 24, 2015 01:05 AM (me1tS)

359 Crud. That'll teach me to think about things on an ONT. I'm a hundred comments behind!!!!

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 01:05 AM (EzgxV)

360 I am sorry. I am just very insecure about cooking, especially cooking
expensive things. I don't mind trying different pasta casseroles because
it's just pasta but cooking meat is different, it is expensive and I am
very bad at it other than ground beef. so my apologies

It ain't that big a deal jeff. I live alone too so I hear ya. One non-stick pan for eggs, ground beef, etc. that doesn't require high heat. A 2 quart sauce pan for soups and such and a cast iron pan will feed you fine. A slow cooker is good for bigger chunks of beast and you can't make a mistake with those.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 01:06 AM (/tTDo)

361 I am sure it would. Here is a possibly stupid idea:
if you have a solid glass (Pyrex) cooktop, why bother with a pan to cook
a steak? Just melt a little butter onto the cooktop, and fry your steak
right on the Pyrex. After all, you used to be able to buy Pyrex
cookware. My mother had some.


Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 12:54 AM (7MWCL)

Haven't thought of that... We'd cook certain things directly on the grates when we had a gas stove (nothing greasy)... with a glasstop one might be able to sear a steak on it (I get kind of hung up on the faux grill lines)

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 01:08 AM (T78UI)

362 Okay so how do I cook a steak, any steak, to a temperature of at least medium well, without a charcoal grill, without a cast iron pan, and with a glass topped stove

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:09 AM (uZNvH)

363 FFS:

Walmart
Backyard Grill 12" Portable Charcoal Grill
$9.98

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 01:09 AM (9YDUz)

364 (I get kind of hung up on the faux grill lines)

You could just draw those on with a sharpie.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 24, 2015 01:09 AM (YJmuy)

365 Shit, they even have a mini-Weber for $30.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 01:10 AM (9YDUz)

366 Almost forgot, saw a guy cruising around in the grocery store on one of these earlier tonight http://youtu.be/9G4yiO1Cmv4

Posted by: All Teh Meh at November 24, 2015 01:11 AM (nithJ)

367 Chemjeff letting the steak get to room temp before cooking will help a lot in cooking it to medium. Regardless of equipment. Practice makes perfect though.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 01:12 AM (wHX4r)

368 Fuckers are making me hungry and I just ate.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 01:13 AM (/tTDo)

369 Okay so how do I cook a steak, any steak, to a temperature of at least medium well, without a charcoal grill, without a cast iron pan, and with a glass topped stove
Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:09 AM (uZNvH)

******

You are way overthinking this whole thing. Spend $20 on a grill, $5 on charcoal and be done with it. Jesus!

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at November 24, 2015 01:13 AM (xNYi9)

370 I'm not going to get a charcoal grill, I am not going to use a charcoal grill in January when there is snow everywhere

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:13 AM (uZNvH)

371 Besides I am no better cooking with a grill than I am cooking over a stove

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:14 AM (uZNvH)

372 Don't over-think the steak cooking business. A steak is a good cut of meat, and it is hard to completely ruin it, short of cremating it. Fry it, grill it, broil it, whatever, and as long as you get it to your desired degree of doneness, and don't dry it out, it will taste fine, even if it isn't done in the precise way that meat sobs proclaim to be the best.


My gas grill ran out of propane part way through cooking a steak once, and I finished the damn thing in the microwave, and it tasted fine to me.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 01:15 AM (7MWCL)

373 But WHAT DO I PUT THE FUCKING STEAK IN?

An aluminum pan? With butter? Is that it? Is that all?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:15 AM (uZNvH)

374 Okay so how do I cook a steak, any steak, to a temperature of at least
medium well, without a charcoal grill, without a cast iron pan, and with
a glass topped stove>>>
Get Sous-vide equipment and then char each side.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 01:16 AM (wHX4r)

375 Lord, I cook steaks (expensive ribeyes which I get only upon occasion, now) on a el-cheapo electric fry pan. I like it a little better than pan frying because of the temp control. I just set the temp at about 400F, and cook 'em, shooting for about a medium.

It's more than good enough for me. Ain't anything fancy, but they taste great.

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 24, 2015 01:17 AM (dvuhZ)

376
Burnt Toast, thanks. No back problems, but the double wall oven really is nice. Last year got into making pie dough from scratch and the sweet potato pie and tourtiere (Quebec meat pie) and chicken pot pies were so good I couldn't believe it.

chemjeff, no apologies - a man wants to be able to prepare his own steak, and at one point everyone had to learn how to do it.

It all depends on your situation, but I'd second MWNP's suggestion: small outdoor grill. If you can swing that arrangement in your living situation, it's the best idea. Probably charcoal if it's small, but gas is fine too. Very simple to cook steak to your liking on a grill. Learn by doing, eat your homework, it all works out in the end and grilling a steak will be second nature to you.

Also, on a related topic, very strongly second dartist's comment about a slow cooker. If you don't have one, get one, seriously. They are less than $30, FFS, and you would not believe the great stuff you can do. With, almost, zero "cooking" involved. Stews, chili, soups, pulled pork, on and on. Lots of recipes where you do 10 min. of prep (chopping veggies, adding spices), put everything in, andcome back 8 hours later to a great finished one-dish meal, with lots of leftovers.

For the novice cook, a slow cooker is near magic, even for a cooking geek, they are great.

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 01:17 AM (QDnY+)

377 I'm not going to get a charcoal grill, I am not going to use a charcoal grill in January when there is snow everywhere
Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:13 AM (uZNvH)

******

Oh, FFS, then search the web. The constant shoot down of suggestions you get here is getting old.

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at November 24, 2015 01:17 AM (xNYi9)

378 And in case you were wondering no I have not cooked a steak before.

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:18 AM (uZNvH)

379 303
Well since I thinkthat *alone* among idiotic and unconstitutional ideas, the gun control ones in Congress stand no chance, not gonna fret too much about Schumer's latest stupid stunt, or Teh Donald's "position" on it (which would be unlikely to survive one meeting with knowledgeable people).

On the other hand, the oven died recently (well, probably a $3 part in the control board/ERC died, but as it's 25 years old, the very savvy old salt at the appliance component place told me I was out of luck). So appliance wisdom is suddenly useful.

Features, shmeatures. An oven (double oven actually) that does what the old did would be fine. Never used the convection - though maybe I should have - in any case they all come with some sort of convection now, it seems. Rolling racks on the bottom - nice, will like it, but whatever.

Service life and quality are really all that matter. So any brand advice? Worth it to spend more for Dacor, vs. KitchenAid? Or is even KitchenAid not worth the price?

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 12:42 AM (QDnY+)




About 12 years ago, we and the fiancee's sister both redid our kitchens. We got a Thermador double oven -- CM302 -- which is an amazing piece of hardware that can do just about anything an oven can do -- proof, dehydrate, roast, cook to a probe temperature, broil at different levels, convection-bake with microwave boost so you can pretend you're a cooking show -- put stuff in, tell a couple of jokes, and pull it out cooked. Fiancee's sister got a Jenn-Air.



99% of the time, we're doing much the same thing and the Jenn-Air is just about as good.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 01:18 AM (EzgxV)

380 That Larry Correia link is awesome.

A very content-rich ONT. I dozed off for awhile, then woke up and read some of the links. I'll be going back to sleep again soon.

Posted by: rickl at November 24, 2015 01:18 AM (sdi6R)

381 And in case you were wondering no I have not cooked a steak before.
Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:18 AM (uZNvH)

*****

Yeah. We kinda grocked that.

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at November 24, 2015 01:19 AM (xNYi9)

382 My gas grill ran out of propane part way through cooking a steak once, and I finished the damn thing in the microwave, and it tasted fine to me.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 01:15 AM (7MWCL)


I cook hamburgers in the microwave all the time. 4 minutes on medium in a covered dish. Turn it over. 4 minutes on high. Done. Nice and well (depending on how many, of course).

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 01:19 AM (zc3Db)

383 "101 Pudding Recipes That'll Set Your Hair On Fire"

Posted by: Moron gourmand at November 24, 2015 01:19 AM (REdlt)

384 Okay so how do I cook a steak, any steak, to a temperature of at least medium well, without a charcoal grill, without a cast iron pan, and with a glass topped stove
Posted by: chemjeff


Get a cheap cut like london broil, cut it in half, and now you have two trial pieces. Salt them, and leave them out of the fridge for 20 min or so.

Cookie sheet, clean it well and leave no residue. Put it on the cold stove-top across two burners and fire both up as hot as they get. The pan needs to get hot as possible.

Take a 'steak' and oil it up with canola oil or other high temp oil, and slap them on the cookie sheet directly over one of the elements.

Don't touch it for three minutes.

Using an oven mitt or heavy kitchen towel, gently slide the pan back and forth. If the steak slides around, aka 'releases', it's time to flip the 'steak' to the area over other element. Season the top. Wait another three and shake the pan. Once it releases, it's done.

Rest the steak on a rack for 3 - 5 minutes and eat.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 01:20 AM (9YDUz)

385 I rediscovered pressure cookers a couple years ago. I've got three of 'em now, and use 'em all the time. And I've had all three going on the stove at once more than a few times.

I even tried some ribeyes in that just to see. It wasn't bad, but mushy. But it is great for roasts. 45 min and it's tender and nearly pulls apart.

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 24, 2015 01:21 AM (dvuhZ)

386
But still laugh when their buddies take a shot in the nuts.


oh yeah....Ogg is still in there.

We are Ogg.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 01:21 AM (rjtGa)

387 "101 Steak Recipes That'll Set Your City On Fire"

Posted by: Step 1 - Optain a surplus Saturn V at November 24, 2015 01:22 AM (me1tS)

388 I rediscovered pressure cookers a couple years ago. I've got three of 'em now,

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 24, 2015 01:21 AM (dvuhZ)


We know. We've got our eye on you. We really need to institute background checks for pressure cookers.

Posted by: Department of Homeland Insecurity at November 24, 2015 01:24 AM (zc3Db)

389
I'm not going to get a charcoal grill, I am not going to use a charcoal grill in January when there is snow everywhere

I have this one but you might check amazon or elsewhere for cheaper. You can use the lid as a frying pan or to cover the deeper pan and the whole thing can go in any temp oven. If you season them and not let them rust you can cook anything with them.


http://tinyurl.com/m6wzxk4

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 01:24 AM (/tTDo)

390 384
Okay so how do I cook a steak, any steak, to a temperature of at
least medium well, without a charcoal grill, without a cast iron pan,
and with a glass topped stove

Posted by: chemjeff



Get a cheap cut like london broil, cut it in half, and now you have
two trial pieces. Salt them, and leave them out of the fridge for 20 min
or so.



Cookie sheet, clean it well and leave no residue. Put it on the cold
stove-top across two burners and fire both up as hot as they get. The
pan needs to get hot as possible.



Take a 'steak' and oil it up with canola oil or other high temp oil,
and slap them on the cookie sheet directly over one of the elements.



Don't touch it for three minutes.



Using an oven mitt or heavy kitchen towel, gently slide the pan back
and forth. If the steak slides around, aka 'releases', it's time to
flip the 'steak' to the area over other element. Season the top. Wait
another three and shake the pan. Once it releases, it's done.



Rest the steak on a rack for 3 - 5 minutes and eat.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 01:20 AM (9YDUz)

thank you. I am sorry for my outburst. your suggestion sounds like one that I can try. I will give it a go tomorrow for dinner.

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:24 AM (uZNvH)

391
Thanks cooth. Funny, the oven that died is a Jenn-Air. Probably top of the line 25 years ago - the design, controls, features really resemble contemporary ovens. As you may know there has been ferocious gobbling up of brands and companies by one another in that field over the years, so that there are actually very few mother companies of all those different names.

I know I'm going to have to do a 0-60 smartening up here, sip from that firehose, on ovens. Just want one that will last. I'll pay for longevity in tools I use frequently - very definition of value to me.

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 01:24 AM (QDnY+)

392 "Beat That Meat Like It Owes You Money: How To Show That Steak Who's Boss"

Posted by: Moron gourmand at November 24, 2015 01:25 AM (REdlt)

393 "101 Fried Turkey Recipes that'll Set You, your Entire Family, your Home and Everything you Love on Fire and Still Let your Insurance Company say that Nothing's Covered"

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 01:25 AM (ntObR)

394 373 But WHAT DO I PUT THE FUCKING STEAK IN?

An aluminum pan? With butter? Is that it? Is that all?
Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:15 AM (uZNvH)


Stainless steel is better. I bought some All-Clad cookware a couple of years ago and I'm happy with it. Expensive as hell, but they will last forever unless I somehow manage to run over them with the car.

Posted by: rickl at November 24, 2015 01:26 AM (sdi6R)

395 You know what, eff it. Eat the steak rare.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 01:26 AM (ntObR)

396 Second the slow cooker and electric fry pan suggestions. I have both. In fact, the slow cooker is slated to do a pot roast tomorrow. Hunk of beef shoulder, vacuum-packed in marinade, what could go wrong? Baby potatoes, baby carrots, a 'mater, cut up, and a half an onion. Plus water and some onion soup mix for the stock.


I have had some stuff from the slow cooker turn out exceedingly bland, but never nasty, spoiled, or burnt. And the bland was due to lack of prep work on my part, I guess. And it's easy to clean up, afterward.


Go to the thrift shop. Slow cookers, skillets, electric frypans, toaster ovens, and suchlike abound. And most have hard, slick surfaces on the parts that contact food, so cleaning them is no hardship. Five or ten bucks will get you a slow cooker; which is probably less than the beef roast you put in it.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 01:26 AM (7MWCL)

397 true story - my parents gave me a convection oven for Christmas as a gift, I never used it because I did not have any recipes for it, and then when I moved I just donated it

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:26 AM (uZNvH)

398 Moron Gourmand, that last one is the one that got Charlie Sheen in big trouble.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 01:27 AM (ntObR)

399
weft-cut with the decisive recommendation. Well done (uh, no Muldoon intended).

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 01:28 AM (QDnY+)

400 Burnt Toast, thanks. No back problems, but the
double wall oven really is nice. Last year got into making pie dough
from scratch and the sweet potato pie and tourtiere (Quebec meat pie)
and chicken pot pies were so good I couldn't believe it.

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 01:17 AM (QDnY+)

Crap, I overlooked that somebody who really, Really likes to bake might want a wall oven.

/forehead smack

When I worked as a baker the ovens wouldn't fit in a two stall garage, but the working height of the doors was just right and the same as a residential wall oven.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 01:29 AM (T78UI)

401 And in case you were wondering no I have not cooked a steak before.

Turn the knob on the oven setting to broil.

Put some foil in a metal or Pyrex (TM) pan.

Put the steak in the pan. Let the oven heat up for 5 minutes. Put the pan in the oven.

After 4 minutes take the pan out (using oven mitt or towel) and turn the steak with a fork. Put back in oven.

After 4 minutes take pan out and turn steak again.

Put back in for 2 more minutes.

Take out of oven and let sit for 8 minutes.

Turn off oven.

Done.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 01:29 AM (rjtGa)

402 I've got a fool neighbor that has cooked steaks with a damn blowtorch. I don't mean some pussy little propane torch, I mean the big "rosebud" heating tip on an O/A rig. This is what you would use to heat a big piece of steel up red hot to bend easily, amongst other uses. He gets a real good sear with that. And very cooking time, too.

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 24, 2015 01:30 AM (dvuhZ)

403 >>>Moron Gourmand, that last one is the one that got Charlie Sheen in big trouble.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 01:27 AM (ntObR)<<<

Thought it was this one -- "Learning to Love Spam -- How To Enjoy That Bad Meat in the Can"

Posted by: Moron gourmand at November 24, 2015 01:30 AM (REdlt)

404 You know what, eff it. Eat the steak rare.

Leave it on the cow & have a chocolate milkshake!

Posted by: Adriane the Ethnic Cuisine Critic ... at November 24, 2015 01:31 AM (jnAIZ)

405 "It's actually not that easy to poach an egg, I think"

You can't be serious!

Step one: Boil some water
Step two: Crack an egg and drop it in the boiling water.
Step three: Remove cooked egg from the water with a draining spatula, after about 90 seconds.

Posted by: navybrat at November 24, 2015 01:31 AM (Xodlv)

406 publius, LOL. Wait 'til something goes wrong.

"Hey, how'd that last steak turn out?"
"Everything's burning... burning... [sob]"

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 01:31 AM (ntObR)

407 Come, come, Mr. Chemjeff, I'd like a vodka martini, shaken, but not stirred.

...

Oh and if you have some spare Britt Ekblund, mix that in as well, there's a good chap.

Posted by: the man with the solar gun at November 24, 2015 01:32 AM (me1tS)

408 chemjeff, just keep asking, trying and asking. There are some good cooks in here and ignore the pricks. I have high hopes for that AOSHQ cook book.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 01:32 AM (/tTDo)

409 If you find these instructions confusing go to nearest fast food establishment and say "number one meal supersize".

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 01:32 AM (rjtGa)

410 "The Joy of Meatpacking in San Francisco"

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 01:32 AM (ntObR)

411 After 4 minutes take the pan out (using oven mitt or towel) and turn the steak with a fork. Put back in oven.


Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 01:29 AM (rjtGa)


"But, what kind of fork? One with three tines or four? A salad fork? Can I use s spoon, instead? What if I drop my fork as I'm reaching for the oven? Can I hand wash it or do I have to put it in the dishwasher and wait for it to finish? ..."

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 01:33 AM (zc3Db)

412 Slight correction for clarity's sake:

Take a 'steak' and oil it up with canola oil or other high temp oil,
and slap them it on the cookie sheet directly over one of the elements.


Just to be clear, Do one 'steak' at a time.

Also, you don't need apologize Chem, just know that like anything in life you have to be willing to potentially make mistakes. If you overcook $5 worth of meat means you've learn $5 worth of cooking skills.

Keep a journal if you're OCD and you'll know what to do the next time.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 01:33 AM (9YDUz)

413 Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 01:29 AM (rjtGa)


thank you for that. are those times for medium rare, or medium, or well done, or what?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:33 AM (uZNvH)

414 They are semi-automatic assault pressure cookers with the thing on the handle that goes up and jiggles, too. You will pry them from cold -- well, broiled dead fingers.

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 24, 2015 01:33 AM (dvuhZ)

415 I'm not going to get a charcoal grill, I am not going to use a charcoal grill in January when there is snow everywhere

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:13 AM (uZNvH)


Try searching Alton Brown's webpages and videos, I am sure he has had more than one video/article on how to make a chopshop steak at home using basic tools (I know he has one on how to 'dry age' a porterhouse). I haven't watched him lately but he has very good shit and gets into the 'food chemistry' to understand what is being done (nothing weird, what is dry aging, mayo type emulsions and how they work, what does kneading dough do...).

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 01:34 AM (T78UI)

416 About 12 years ago, we and the fiancee's sister both
redid our kitchens. We got a Thermador double oven -- CM302 -- which is
an amazing piece of hardware that can do just about anything an oven
can do -- proof, dehydrate, roast, cook to a probe temperature, broil at
different levels, convection-bake with microwave boost so you can
pretend you're a cooking show -- put stuff in, tell a couple of jokes,
and pull it out cooked. Fiancee's sister got a Jenn-Air.







99% of the time, we're doing much the same thing and the Jenn-Air is just about as good.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 01:18 AM (EzgxV)


Thermador? That old Vogue motorhome I am gutting out had a Thermador microwave/"infrared" unit above the 3-way fridge. Heavy sucker, too. Mice didn't get into it. I plugged it in, and both modes work, but the analog timer is stuck. That is probably fixable. The microwave doesn't seem to be super-powerful. After a full minute, a 12-ounce water bottle was warm, but nowhere near hot.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 24, 2015 01:34 AM (7MWCL)

417 I had spiced pear macaroons from the bakery yesterday...

Posted by: Adriane the Ethnic Cuisine Critic ... at November 24, 2015 01:35 AM (jnAIZ)

418 NO PYREX UNDER A BROILER

Posted by: Emmie at November 24, 2015 01:36 AM (PiNvr)

419 418
NO PYREX UNDER A BROILER

Posted by: Emmie at November 24, 2015 01:36 AM (PiNvr)

why not? will it crack?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:37 AM (uZNvH)

420 There might not have been any Muslim celebrating 911 in New Jersey but they where in front of Louis Farrakhan and Rev Jeremiah Wright. The whole sermon of not God Bless America, G D American. The Chickens are coming home to roost was about 911 and the victims of the evil AmeriKKKa are coming back to attack. To attack Trump the media is no praising Bush as if he was so great that no one would celebrate a wounded America with Bush in charge. Even before the towers fell truthers were blaming him both for not stopping it and for doing it. Some at the same time.

Posted by: TJ at November 24, 2015 01:38 AM (6cDf/)

421 thank you for that. are those times for medium rare, or medium, or well done, or what?

That should give you a rare steak if it's more than an inch thick or a rare/medium rare steak if it's one inch or less.


Good eatin. You don't want to cook a quality steak Medium or Well. You're just wasting money if you do.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 01:39 AM (rjtGa)

422 Posted by: TJ at November 24, 2015 01:38 AM (6cDf/)

The Fakestinians were handing out candy in the street. They scrubbed that from the broadcasts pretty quickly.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 01:40 AM (zc3Db)

423 NO PYREX UNDER A BROILER

Or touching a metal pan full of ribs in the oven. Lol, my buddy's wife almost threw water on that one. Freaked out girls are funny sometimes.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 01:40 AM (/tTDo)

424
Toast thanks for reminding me to look up Alton Brown's stuff online. He used to have that Food Channel show where he focused on the chemistry/physics/etc. of cooking, it was very good. I admit I haven't checked thoroughly, but now it seems he mostly just does these lame cooking competition shows.

He's also a gun nut. Came across that on some gun forum years ago. An Evil Black Rifle enthusiast with a sassy 2nd Amendment mouth - though of course he probably keeps that tuned down while amongst TV and NYC sorts.

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 01:41 AM (QDnY+)

425 Also, don't lick a metal flag pole in International Falls in the month of January.

Posted by: navybrat at November 24, 2015 01:41 AM (Xodlv)

426 why not? will it crack?

Shatter.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 24, 2015 01:41 AM (YJmuy)

427 339 I am sorry. I am just very insecure about cooking, especially cooking expensive things. I don't mind trying different pasta casseroles because it's just pasta but cooking meat is different, it is expensive and I am very bad at it other than ground beef. so my apologies

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 12:54 AM (uZNvH)



Don't fret it. So, one little bit of fun is to take a cheap well-trimmed steak (that has an area with no fat on a side), then heat a pan up pretty good (a water droplet should immediately start boiling away nearly as soon as it hits the pan -- if you use drops of soy sauce, later cooking will mop 'em up). When the pan is good and hot, slap it with a little bit of cooking oil (about 1 Tablespoon of peanut or EVOO), count to 10, then lay your steak in it.



Walk to the farthest corner of your place away from the kitchen, touch the wall, then walk back. What you should then observe, on that side with no fat, is that your steak has a little grey band on the bottom, and still looks raw at the top. If you take a pair of heat-safe and nonstick-safe kitchen tongs and lift your steak out of the pan, you should see that it is seared around the edges on the cooked side, but that it has bowed away from the heat and the middle is just grey. Take your time doing the inspecting, because you're also hoping the pan is reheating.




Lay it back in the pan with the raw side down, then walk to the furthest point in your house from the kitchen, touch the wall, and walk back. Looking at your little window into the cooking process, you should see both surfaces have grey layers and the middle is still pink. Swoosh the steak around in the pan to find hot spots (and soak up your testing soy sauce). You'll find that this side also got seared better than the first side, because it couldn't arch-up in the middle as well.



As was suggested upthread, if your pan is ever "wet", it isn't getting hot enough -- and you should put the steak aside on a plate until any puddles bubble off and you start getting sizzle again. If it weeps liquid while set aside, that's a perfect liquid to test to see if it is hot enough.



Get good sear on each side and alternate. When the grey layers meet at the edge, the steak will likely be about medium in the middle. You can always slice it in half on its resting plate and check. Just keep trying this on cheaper steaks until you're comfortable with it, then move up to better cuts of meat....or different types of preparation.




After a while, you'll see someone asking questions on the ONT and think, "it's like riding a bicycle.....you don't read a book."

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 01:42 AM (EzgxV)

428 Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 01:39 AM (rjtGa)

thank you. I would rather overcook a steak than undercook a steak.

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:42 AM (uZNvH)

429 G'night everyone.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 24, 2015 01:43 AM (YJmuy)

430 418

NO PYREX UNDER A BROILER



Posted by: Emmie at November 24, 2015 01:36 AM (PiNvr)
why not? will it crack?


Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:37 AM (uZNvH)


Because says so right on it.
At least if it is the pyrex that says right on it not to use under the broiler.
Rather like just about every plastic packaging bag one gets these days has a little notice not to put your baby in it.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 01:44 AM (T78UI)

431 340 Heh. Re the Starbucks barista misspelling your name to make points.

I am in a Starbucks maybe once a month. Not more, really. I can see why someone at HQ did the name-on-cup thing. It's more personal than a number, better than at MickeyD's when they yell out FOUR EIGHTY SIX!!!!!

But I can see the occasional wise-ass hipster douchebag grinds-worker looking to riff on your name just to needle the old dude.

Which is why, if I am asked, I say "One." Eyebrows go up, and I say, "Yeah, One," and hold up one finger. I don't care if they spell it Oh-Enn-EE on the cup or just the number 1. They really can't fuck it up, and what has happened, is that I fucked with them, rather than let them fuck with me.

They might think that I'm a douche for doing this, and they probably do, but they have NEVER said, "Hey, that's not really your name, izzit?"

So many weird names for people today, hey, they've learned not to question it, but accept.

Whatever.

Posted by: the littl shyning man at November 24, 2015 12:54 AM (U6f54)




I don't do Starbucks, but I've found that other establishments look at me funny when I say, "cthulhu".



Of course, they look at me funny when I use the name on my driver's license, too.....so "cthulhu" it is.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 01:44 AM (EzgxV)

432 why not? will it crack?

Corning Glass will always save your ungrateful hide as you plummet earthward from orbit, fearful space peon!

Just don't scratch the Teflon, that shit is weird.

Posted by: so I can use a wooden utensil on this space-age polymer, but not one fashioned from plastic at November 24, 2015 01:45 AM (me1tS)

433 thank you. I would rather overcook a steak than undercook a steak.>>>

I felt kinda bad for you until that comment.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 01:45 AM (wHX4r)

434 thank you. I would rather overcook a steak than undercook a steak.

Then do 4/4/4. Or 5/4/4. Rather than 4/4/2.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 01:46 AM (rjtGa)

435
dartist that reminds me, last year I finally got some decent oven-ready skillets, so I started doing fritattas in that oven that just died. As I'd ever before done that (i.e. skillets in an oven), I just defaulted to opening the oven door and .... grabbing the handle (!). Well, *started* to grab the handle. Holy Tariq Aziz in a fire trench, was that sucker hot - duh. Gave myself little almost-1st-degree area burns on the hand (this happened at least twice!).

Learned to put oven mitts/pot holders next to the oven to remind myself.

And ooh - frittatas. Just a big omelette with even less care or effort, great for using up odds and ends (both veggie and meat) in the frig, and they do come out nicely, lighter than omelettes.

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 01:48 AM (QDnY+)

436 cthulhu is right, and if the beast is too raw for you a few seconds in a microwave will bring it to where you like it, especially if you're reheating leftovers.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 01:48 AM (/tTDo)

437 I've never had a Pyrex crack or anything in a broiler in about 200 broils.

Don't have any idea what y'all are talking about.

???

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 01:49 AM (rjtGa)

438 364 (I get kind of hung up on the faux grill lines)

You could just draw those on with a sharpie.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 24, 2015 01:09 AM (YJmuy)



OK, that got a giggle.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 01:49 AM (EzgxV)

439 thank you very much cthulhu.
I will try that out.

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:49 AM (uZNvH)

440 I felt kinda bad for you until that comment.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 01:45 AM (wHX4r)


LOL. The dirty looks I get from people when I order a steak well done ... make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 01:49 AM (zc3Db)

441 At a Chinese restaurant, we are just "Smith." Anything else is too complicated.

Posted by: tcn in AK at November 24, 2015 01:49 AM (+YMhA)

442 I am sorry to occupy so much of your time when it comes to cooking steaks.
But if you actually do google searches you will see that people are either presuming that you have a cast iron skillet or that you already know what you are doing, or both. I don't have either so I appreciate the advice here.

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:52 AM (uZNvH)

443 391
Thanks cooth. Funny, the oven that died is a Jenn-Air. Probably top of the line 25 years ago - the design, controls, features really resemble contemporary ovens. As you may know there has been ferocious gobbling up of brands and companies by one another in that field over the years, so that there are actually very few mother companies of all those different names.

I know I'm going to have to do a 0-60 smartening up here, sip from that firehose, on ovens. Just want one that will last. I'll pay for longevity in tools I use frequently - very definition of value to me.

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 01:24 AM (QDnY+)




You're going to be putting out some $$$, also check Consumer Reports.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 01:52 AM (EzgxV)

444 cthulhu so just to be clear, your recipe does not require a cast iron skillet?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:53 AM (uZNvH)

445 LOL. The dirty looks I get from people when I order a steak well done ... make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside >>>

If you want well done there aint no need for instruction is there? You like it that way no skin off my nose. I even cook them that way for company.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 01:54 AM (wHX4r)

446 Well, *started* to grab the handle. Holy Tariq Aziz in a fire trench, was that sucker hot - duh. Gave myself little almost-1st-degree area burns on the hand (this happened at least twice!).

Learned to put oven mitts/pot holders next to the oven to remind myself.

Posted by: rhomboid


Indeed. You'll never forget the one time you do that. It's the worst burn you can experience outside of a laboratory.

Also, don't be imbibing while doing skillet roasting. Just don't.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 01:54 AM (9YDUz)

447 rhomboid at November 24, 2015 01:48 AM (QDnY+)

Oh man I do love frittatas, especially with garden tomatoes. I had to look awhile to find a pan that would withstand the oven. I know full well that a pan in the oven is hot but damned if I don't have to re-learn that one from time to time.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 01:55 AM (/tTDo)

448
This thing of giving a fake funny name for the baristas to call out might have potential. I think it's worthy of a day time thread. Pool the Horde's humor capacities and come up with some good ones.

"Fire" could be one. "Fire! Fire?! Soy vanilla skim latte?"

"Gun"

"Pyezda" (russki for the c-word, oughta be a hit in certain urban markets, Brighton Beach in NYC, Richmond district in SF)

It's late. I'm hungry from reading about steak for a fucking hour. Cut me some slack.

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 01:55 AM (QDnY+)

449 why not? will it crack?

Corning Glass will always save your ungrateful hide as you plummet earthward from orbit, fearful space peon!

Just don't scratch the Teflon, that shit is weird.

Posted by: so I can use a wooden utensil on this space-age polymer, but not one fashioned from plastic at November 24, 2015 01:45 AM (me1tS)


Those ceramic pans are actually quite nice to cook with. Heats well and cleans easy.

Posted by: The Ceramic Hat at November 24, 2015 01:56 AM (vBeA5)

450 Goodnight everybody. Thanks for the great chat.

Posted by: qdpsteve at November 24, 2015 01:56 AM (ntObR)

451
419 418
NO PYREX UNDER A BROILER

Posted by: Emmie at November 24, 2015 01:36 AM (PiNvr)
why not? will it crack?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:37 AM (uZNvH)



Worse. If it's not vintage Pyrex, it could even explode -- while you're handling it (they went from borosilicate to soda glass).

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 01:56 AM (EzgxV)

452 You like it that way no skin off my nose. I even cook them that way for company.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 01:54 AM (wHX4r)


You are a very gracious host.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 01:57 AM (zc3Db)

453 Learned to put oven mitts/pot holders next to the oven to remind myself.

I
bought some great world-class silicon-Kevlar and whatever oven mitts ... work
like a charm. You pull that sizzling tray of fiery chicken wings out
from the devil's oven with nary a care.

Then at the last second you
realize you're Michael Jacksoning this operation, as your naked left hand
almost grips the volcanic metal which your well-guarded right hand has
been giving no fucks about.

Posted by: Charlie Sheen says wrap it all up at November 24, 2015 01:57 AM (me1tS)

454 I have actually seen an exploding Pyrex dish before. I tried to cook London Broil once and I put the pan in the sink and it exploded.

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:58 AM (uZNvH)

455 Well it is not my birthday anymore, oh well.
Guess I had better finish up this beer then.

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:58 AM (uZNvH)

456 About the 'Why characters left the show' link. Here's one you won't hear about otherwise. Howard McNear, who played Floyd The Barber on the Andy Griffith Show:

"He was cast as the vague, chatty barber Floyd Lawson on The Andy Griffith Show. During the show's run, McNear suffered a stroke that rendered the left side of his body nearly paralyzed. McNear left the series for nearly a year and a half to recover. Andy Griffith later asked McNear to return to the series. McNear agreed but was unable to walk or stand. The effect on the character was noticeable. Floyd spoke more slowly, usually drawing out words or phrases which, unexpectedly, made the character funnier and more endearing. The production crew accommodated his disability and McNear was usually seen seated or standing with the support of a stand. Many scenes were shot with him sitting on a bench outside the barber shop, as opposed to actively trimming hair as before. According to Jack Dodson (who played Howard Sprague on Andy Griffith), McNear began having difficulty remembering his lines and became anxious and frustrated. He left the series in 1967.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at November 24, 2015 01:59 AM (9mTYi)

457 This thing of giving a fake funny name for the baristas to call out might have potential. I think it's worthy of a day time thread. Pool the Horde's humor capacities and come up with some good ones.
Posted by: rhomboid


Bradley.
Cooper.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 01:59 AM (9YDUz)

458 goddammit pixy, this is the last straw!

Posted by: not really the last straw, who can stay angry at a wide-eyed Kiwi? at November 24, 2015 02:00 AM (me1tS)

459 Worse. If it's not vintage Pyrex, it could even explode -- while you're handling it (they went from borosilicate to soda glass).

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 01:56 AM (EzgxV)


I've done glass blowing and high temperature experiments with both borosilicate and soda glass, and heating up to 500 deg F isn't the problem... it's the sudden temperature change.

Pure silica can go much higher (it's quite solid at temperature that will vaporize many metals).

Posted by: The Silica hat at November 24, 2015 02:00 AM (vBeA5)

460
Exploding Pyrex?

*ISIS brain trust furiously scribbles notes on possible new means of conducting jihad*

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 02:00 AM (QDnY+)

461 Well it is not my birthday anymore, oh well.
Guess I had better finish up this beer then.

Hey, Happy belated Birthday friend. Hope you had a good one.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 02:01 AM (/tTDo)

462 To cook, you've got to just dive in and do it. That's how you learn. You'll fuck up every now and then and then learn not do that particular thing again.

Me, I don't know anything about cooking, so I'm not hindered by knowing what I'm not supposed to do.

You want a decent steak? Go to a grocery store and get a nice ribeye, then stop and get a Presto electric fry pan from Wally World or wherever. Hell, the grocery store may have one.

Turn it up to 400F. Wash the damn steak and then beat it a little bit tot tender it up. Slap it on. Let it stay for about 5 - 6 minutes for 1" thick of so. About halfway through, put the lid on and let it steam (helps cook inside better). Take lid off, flip over and cook for another 4 minutes or so. Put the lid on again with about 2 -1 minute left.

How much lid on and off is something you experiment with. YOu don't want too much liquid water to form in there. You get browning with the lid off, and cooking inside in the steam bath.

Now, for me, that makes a helluva good steak. It's nothing fancy, and simple as hell.

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 24, 2015 02:01 AM (dvuhZ)

463 >>>
NO PYREX UNDER A BROILER

Posted by: Emmie at November 24, 2015 01:36 AM (PiNvr)
why not? will it crack?
Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:37 AM (uZNvH)
---
Quite possibly. Broiling blasts high heat at the food and different parts of the Pyrex dish may reach different temperatures at different times. As one part expands more than other parts, it may crack.

The instructions for Pyrex say to not use under a broiler. It's okay for baking because the oven temp is more uniform.

Posted by: Emmie at November 24, 2015 02:02 AM (PiNvr)

464 Has anyone seen Misanthropic around in the last few days?

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at November 24, 2015 02:02 AM (9mTYi)

465 You are a very gracious host.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair>>>

I even eat them well done by accident since steak is a rarity at my house. And I am not all that great a cook. I like what a I like but if I get Steak I feel lucky.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 02:02 AM (wHX4r)

466 I have actually seen an exploding Pyrex dish before.
I tried to cook London Broil once and I put the pan in the sink and it
exploded.


Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:58 AM (uZNvH)

Lab safety works in the kitchen too.

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 02:03 AM (T78UI)

467 Who is up for Dutch Babies?

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 24, 2015 02:03 AM (T78UI)

468 I have actually seen an exploding Pyrex dish before. I tried to cook London Broil once and I put the pan in the sink and it exploded.

Dude.....CHEMjeff. Chem as in chemistry?

Seriously?

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 02:03 AM (rjtGa)

469 While I sit here craving steak - cooked in any imaginable fashion, though that industrial blow torch thing mentioned above has kinda captured my fancy - I marvel at the river of knowledge here. Andy Griffith Show trivia (interesting stuff), and expert commentary on the peformance of silica at high temperatures.

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 02:05 AM (QDnY+)

470 Of course, I've held silica with had one end at about 2100 deg F and the other at negative 250 deg F... less than a foot apart. It's the the temperature or even the temperature differential... it's the sudden change in temperature.

Posted by: The Silica hat at November 24, 2015 02:05 AM (vBeA5)

471 eleven yeah

ruined a perfectly good dish

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 02:06 AM (uZNvH)

472 >>>This thing of giving a fake funny name for the
baristas to call out might have potential. I think it's worthy of a day
time thread. Pool the Horde's humor capacities and come up with some
good ones.
Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 01:55 AM (QDnY+)<<<




Damn. Sorry I missed this.

Posted by: zombie Dick Trickle at November 24, 2015 02:07 AM (REdlt)

473 Has anyone seen Misanthropic around in the last few days?

I think he has a cabin he goes to on the weekends to fish and paint but I'm not on as much lately.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 02:07 AM (/tTDo)

474 Well ....if chem doesn't mean chemistry...

You can't touch a hot Pyrex to something cool. Yes then it will fail possibly catastrophically.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 02:08 AM (rjtGa)

475 Of course, I've held silica with had one end at about 2100 deg F and the other at negative 250 deg F... less than a foot apart.

Posted by: The Silica hat at November 24, 2015 02:05 AM (vBeA5)


Where were you, standing on the horizon line of Mercury?

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at November 24, 2015 02:08 AM (zc3Db)

476 yes, chem means chemistry
no, it doesn't mean chemistry in the kitchen

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 02:08 AM (uZNvH)

477 You guys don't want to know how many racks of ribs I've fucked up.

I still can't get it to the point where i'd serve a friend.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 02:08 AM (9YDUz)

478 Chemjeff, if you have the time and interest, you might enjoy the instructional videos from America's Test Kitchen. They have a TV show. If you sign up for emails, they'll send you links so you can watch selected episodes for free. I get an email every Monday with links in it. They also offer a membership for a fee that gives you more access.

Posted by: Emmie at November 24, 2015 02:09 AM (PiNvr)

479 it doesn't mean chemistry in the bedroom either, for that matter

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 02:09 AM (uZNvH)

480 The one time I exploded Pyrex. Was trying to make gravy from the drippings of a baked chicken. Mom always just used the metal tray for gravy why not the Pyrex dish? Apparently the gas burner was not even enough under the glass pan. Fun cleaning gravy from behind a stove ensued.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 02:09 AM (wHX4r)

481 But I could still have fun with the Starbucks idiots.

Posted by: Dick Armey at November 24, 2015 02:09 AM (REdlt)

482 I've had a bad day. I'm pissed off that dr? W/0 bedside manner, office I've been going to since August 2005- finally listened when I told her again, since July, that I want blood test for rheumotoid arthritis & I do have it.
She doesn't listen.
I do have RA factor & next step is RA Doctor. I'm going to neck pain dr ( a great doctor) & called my hand surgeon's office to tell him that I do ave it.

I asked them to give me recommendations for rheumatologist. I'm sure I'd be worse if I hadn't been on NSAID since 1999.


She is an idiot & I can't find dr. Near here& none are taking new patients.

My semi retired dentist's son pay more attention to what I say than thie R's office I've been going to since August 2005?

V

Posted by: Carol at November 24, 2015 02:10 AM (sj3Ax)

483 Just use a metal pan.

Put the foil in it either way. It makes cleaning far easier.


Sheesh.....

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 02:10 AM (rjtGa)

484 it's the sudden change in temperature

You'd figure between Yes, Floyd, and Rush, one of those weirdos would've written a stunning single about this back in the '70s.

Posted by: get on with the fascination at November 24, 2015 02:10 AM (me1tS)

485 I have to get up early & better go to bed.
good Night!

Posted by: Carol at November 24, 2015 02:12 AM (sj3Ax)

486 Good night, Carol!

Posted by: Emmie at November 24, 2015 02:13 AM (PiNvr)

487
Only two people born in the 1800s are still alive today.

Los Angeles, New York, Washington, D.C., Atlanta
GERONTOLOGY RESEARCH GROUP

Numbers of Living Supercentenarians as of Last Update
Last Updated On: Nov 21 2015

Females - 51
Males - 1
------------
Total 52


FML......

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at November 24, 2015 02:13 AM (kdS6q)

488 Night Carol, hope you have a better day tomorrow.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 02:14 AM (/tTDo)

489 Getting up early is for low-energy steaks!

Posted by: a sizzling late-night rib-eye at November 24, 2015 02:14 AM (me1tS)

490 469: If you deign to try that, the rosebud tip puts out some serious BTUs. You'll burn up a piece of meat in no time, I mean nothing but carbon quickly. Just sort of give it a few licks with the flame at a time until you get the hang of how much heat you're putting in. It's basically just a stunt to brag about.

I got into a little plumbing job many years ago, and was doing some serious copper pipe soldering. I got sick of waiting for the little propane torch to heat it, so I got the bright idea of using my O/A rig. I just used the cutting tip (on the pre-heat, no O2 lever, of course)

I hit the joint for what I thought was a very short period of time and it was already so hot the solder melted and ran like water. I had to redo the joint because I got it too hot.

The difference in heat output is amazing, and a big rosebud bulk heating tip is even more.

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 24, 2015 02:14 AM (dvuhZ)

491 good night Carol!
see you tomorrow I hope

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 02:14 AM (uZNvH)

492 chemjeff ...

http://www.amazon.com/Harold-McGee/e/
B000APD9MQ/ref=sr_tc_2_0?qid=1448349621&sr=1-2-ent

extra space before the B000

Posted by: Adriane the Ethnic Cuisine Critic ... at November 24, 2015 02:16 AM (jnAIZ)

493 489
Getting up early is for low-energy steaks!


Posted by: a sizzling late-night rib-eye at November 24, 2015 02:14 AM (me1tS)

oh lol

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 02:16 AM (uZNvH)

494 444 cthulhu so just to be clear, your recipe does not require a cast iron skillet?

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 01:53 AM (uZNvH)



It's not a recipe, it's observations. No special equipment required (besides the tongs). You could use the baking sheet on your cooktop if you wanted to get crazy with it.




I can do this quickly and easily with a $12 Walmart skillet, 'cause I've got gas burners that make each cycle very quick -- but the process should work with anything. You know the old expression, "you sell the sizzle, not the steak?" -- the trick is to get the sear, and the trick to that is a pan hot enough that water just boils away.



I should also note that it wouldn't hurt to have a box of baking soda nearby. If I get little flames in the skillet*, I just roll with it -- and I actually doubt that you can get them with an underpowered electric range -- but cutting the power and dumping a box of baking soda over anything you're worried about will almost certainly render it harmless......and you can actually wash everything off and start again and still eat the food.



*Under certain temperature conditions, the meat will "sweat" a combination of water-based liquids and fats, they will layer, and -- if the pan is the correct temperature for a sizzle -- the water will boil and propel the fats into an aerosol. If a cloud of aerosolized fats is exposed to open flame (like a gas burner), it can flash. I never had it happen before we rebuilt the kitchen in 2004, and I used to see it in cooking shows, but it still spooked me the first few times.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 02:16 AM (EzgxV)

495
oh publius I was just joking, of course, about the blow torch cooking method - I'm not even familiar with the rig you referred to (just know that it's not, um, optimized for cooking applications)

Posted by: rhomboid at November 24, 2015 02:17 AM (QDnY+)

496 482: I've got RA, had it for going on 15 years now. If you want to sound off, have at it, if the others cans stand misery loving company.

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 24, 2015 02:17 AM (dvuhZ)

497 okay I think I am going to bed now.
I will report back tomorrow with my steak cooking triumph I hope.
good night all

Posted by: chemjeff at November 24, 2015 02:19 AM (uZNvH)

498 Goodnight, Carol.

Posted by: Herr Wick Rilson at November 24, 2015 02:19 AM (Vljfb)

499 Chemjeff...hang in there bro....

We're all in this together.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 02:20 AM (rjtGa)

500 Night chemjeff, good luck roasting beasts.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 02:22 AM (/tTDo)

501 500

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 02:23 AM (rjtGa)

502 derk

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 02:23 AM (rjtGa)

503 501 500
Posted by: eleven


You're just this close to 5150.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 24, 2015 02:24 AM (9YDUz)

504 496 482: I've got RA, had it for going on 15 years now. If you want to sound off, have at it, if the others cans stand misery loving company.

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 24, 2015 02:17 AM (dvuhZ)



I've known folks who got hit bad. Y'all have my deepest sympathy.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 02:24 AM (EzgxV)

505 The worst thing I've had happen in the kitchen was a flash boil event of some sort. I was warming up something in the pan, it was meat with fat and a little water. Somehow, there was superheat event, or perhaps some moisture condensed and then dripped back down. Anyway, it lifted the lid off and sprayed emulsion all around. That might have got fire with open flame.

Oil/fat floating on top of water can do that. The higher boiling point material is floating on top of the lower.

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 24, 2015 02:24 AM (dvuhZ)

506 Be the beef.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 02:24 AM (rjtGa)

507 Tomorrow is my last day of paid work for the week. Then I get to start the work week of family. Fixing the dinner for T day, Fixing the kids car, Fixing my old truck and doing final prep for winter on a couple houses. The last part would have been forced to be done by mother nature before now so I should not whine.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 02:25 AM (wHX4r)

508 You're just this close to 5150.

Bittersweet.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 02:25 AM (rjtGa)

509 All the "steak" talk is very triggering.

I need to go find a safe space.

Posted by: Count Dracula at November 24, 2015 02:26 AM (REdlt)

510 You're just this close to 5150.

I guess I missed 420 again dammit.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 02:30 AM (/tTDo)

511
All the "steak" talk is very triggering.

I need to go find a safe space.>>>

Go to a Golden Coral. They are pretty empty about now.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 02:30 AM (wHX4r)

512 505 The worst thing I've had happen in the kitchen was a flash boil event of some sort. I was warming up something in the pan, it was meat with fat and a little water. Somehow, there was superheat event, or perhaps some moisture condensed and then dripped back down. Anyway, it lifted the lid off and sprayed emulsion all around. That might have got fire with open flame.

Oil/fat floating on top of water can do that. The higher boiling point material is floating on top of the lower.

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 24, 2015 02:24 AM (dvuhZ)



Part if it was that I'd done my homework -- we have a 36" cooktop with a 42" stainless backsplash and 42" hood, and I can throw a paper towel into the upper half of the area between the cooktop and hood when the hood's on max and have it sucked upward into the hood. I could do flambes on my cooktop with no worries.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 02:33 AM (EzgxV)

513 Dam It's got late this last day of work is likely to suck tomorrow.

Good night all.

Posted by: Willy J. at November 24, 2015 02:34 AM (wHX4r)

514 Since we're in a cooking mode, how about this bullshit?

http://tinyurl.com/nw5n4p9

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 02:35 AM (/tTDo)

515 514 Since we're in a cooking mode, how about this bullshit?

http://tinyurl.com/nw5n4p9

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 02:35 AM (/tTDo)



Let me out of this fucking state.....

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 02:39 AM (EzgxV)

516 Be the beef.

Posted by: eleven


You just don't know what it's like. To be meef.

Posted by: Shia at November 24, 2015 02:42 AM (9YDUz)

517 I'd like out of mine as well but unfortunately I have to stand and fight. It's hard to fight something you can't see or touch.

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 02:44 AM (/tTDo)

518 Shia relax...you are a creature on Earth where you belong.

You were born of Earth and you are a natural being that is where it should be.

And everyone hates you.

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 02:50 AM (rjtGa)

519 Shia relax...you are a creature on Earth where you belong.



You were born of Earth and you are a natural being that is where it should be.



And everyone hates you because you fart too much and you're fucking up the atmosphere.

FIFU

Posted by: dartist at November 24, 2015 02:54 AM (/tTDo)

520 *swallows own hand*

Posted by: Shia at November 24, 2015 02:55 AM (9YDUz)

521 *swallows own hand*

Which is a perfectly normal thing to do.

Now....how does that make you.... *feel*?

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 03:03 AM (rjtGa)

522 A variation on the theme: The writers on 'Cheers' soon came to hate Shelly Long due to her constant objections and demands for changes. When Kelsey Grammer was brought on for the role of Fraser Crane, he was only supposed to appear in three episodes and be done with the character.

It was noticed that Shelly Long really didn't like Kelsey Grammer and soon realized that Fraser was exactly what the show needed to add some diversity to the barflies. So Fraser was made a regular character who lasted long than Diane on the series and went on to star in the spinoff show that became one of the most successful sitcoms in TV history.

So unless your name is also the name of the show, it's a good idea to be on friendly terms with the writers.

Posted by: Epobirs at November 24, 2015 03:04 AM (IdCqF)

523 And, now, for something completely different.....




I'm thinking of getting a 12x20 laser engraver/cutter. It's 2/3 of the cost of the car I had before this one, though less than half the cost of its Epilog equivalent. The company is in Las Vegas. I could get one for less than half the cost, but evidently the software and support would then be in Chinese.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 03:05 AM (EzgxV)

524 Now....how does that make you.... *feel*?

Posted by: eleven


hurk

*(fat)

Posted by: Shia at November 24, 2015 03:06 AM (9YDUz)

525 >>>Men Are Not Monsters

They are, but there is a cure.

Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at November 24, 2015 03:07 AM (ZdSzs)

526 Shia relax...you are a creature on Earth where you belong

You were born of Earth and you are a natural being that is where it should be.

And everyone hates you.

Posted by: eleven

---

Hear, hear!

Posted by: Sunni LeBeouf at November 24, 2015 03:13 AM (ZdSzs)

527 *watches self again*

Posted by: Shia at November 24, 2015 03:15 AM (9YDUz)

528 Oh yeah, I at big sporting event. Heah photo ub me in stadium. I have season ticky. No ticky, no watchy.

Posted by: Saving face at November 24, 2015 03:20 AM (ZdSzs)

529 Its hump day sort of, suspect i have to work Friday but have't had to very often in my life.
Good morning horde

Posted by: Skip at November 24, 2015 03:29 AM (KSdzX)

530 The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the stuffing of mattresses.

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at November 24, 2015 03:31 AM (ZdSzs)

531 One of the ideas I have for using the laser cutter might be patentable -- but is way too easy to cheat on or get around -- so I'll throw it out here to get a timestamped "prior art" against any asshole who wants to litigate it.



A lot of what you get from laser cutting has a distinctive char to it. So, what if you flood the workspace with a low-oxygen atmosphere? The laser cutter units frequently have a compressed air line to blow smoke away from the cutting lens -- what if you hook that up to an inert gas? You should be able to cut/engrave a bunch of materials with substantially reduced char.




I'm throwin' this out there -- have at it. And it should put a stick in the spokes of anyone trying to patent it later.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 03:31 AM (EzgxV)

532 Sorry to hear it, Carol. You *know* I completely sympathize about dealing with useless doctors.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at November 24, 2015 03:32 AM (bLnSU)

533 532 Sorry to hear it, Carol. You *know* I completely sympathize about dealing with useless doctors.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at November 24, 2015 03:32 AM (bLnSU)




Hey, Mero -- how are you doing? I wish I weren't so scrambled and I could get up there again soon.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 03:35 AM (EzgxV)

534 The problem is when lefty teachers get caught they back track every time and go on the misunderstanding route. The never get hauled out and busted. One baker gets purposely trapped into not making a cake for someone and their life is ruined.

Posted by: Skip at November 24, 2015 03:40 AM (KSdzX)

535 Any chance Anna Puma is still around?

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 03:45 AM (EzgxV)

536 Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Chores and other stuff
Still left to do ...

Posted by: Adriane the Ethnic Cuisine Critic ... at November 24, 2015 03:46 AM (jnAIZ)

537 Turkish paper: Turkey downs Russian fighter jet near Syrian border after violation of airspace

http://preview.tinyurl.com/nzavvsc

Looking for confirmation now.

Posted by: The Political Fez at November 24, 2015 03:47 AM (vBeA5)

538 Turkey shoots down military jet over Syrian border - local media report plane is Russian

http://preview.tinyurl.com/ocogmrs

Posted by: The Political Fez at November 24, 2015 03:48 AM (vBeA5)

539 Everybody wants to rule the world. Someday, instead of the Roman and Byzantine empires, we'll have the Pajamaboy and the Clockboy empires.

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at November 24, 2015 03:50 AM (ZdSzs)

540 This Gavin McInnes link in the sidebar led me to articles about "replication crisis" which is across the board in the sciences. IOW, they can replicate only about a third of the time and probably less, the result of the left's infiltration.

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at November 24, 2015 03:51 AM (iQIUe)

541 Turkey shoots down military jet over Syrian border - local media report plane is Russian

What does this mean? Is Russia adventuring into NATO airspace?

Is Russia attacking ISIS and being shot down by Turkey?

WTF is going on?

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 03:59 AM (rjtGa)

542 >>>There are in fact times when it's okay (and even necessary) to hit a woman


I prefer the more generic term 'strike'.

Posted by: Holly Holm at November 24, 2015 04:03 AM (ZdSzs)

543 Turkey shoots down military jet over Syrian border - local media report plane is Russian

What does this mean? Is Russia adventuring into NATO airspace?

Is Russia attacking ISIS and being shot down by Turkey?

WTF is going on?
Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 03:59 AM (rjtGa)


Turkey shot dow a Russian jet. Conflicting reports on whether the jet was in Turkish airspace.

At this very moment, Obama is probably picking up and then immediatly slamming down his phone.

Posted by: The Political Fez at November 24, 2015 04:04 AM (vBeA5)

544 Also, a shooting at a Minneapolis #BlackLivesMatter protest. Claims it was a White Supremacist.

Posted by: The Political Fez at November 24, 2015 04:07 AM (vBeA5)

545 I hate Thanksgivivg. It's the time of year when Ingrid Newkirk keeps pestering me to change the name of my country to Tofurky.

Posted by: Tayyip Erdogan at November 24, 2015 04:08 AM (ZdSzs)

546 "Turkey shot dow a Russian jet. Conflicting reports on whether the jet was in Turkish airspace."

Turkey trying to jinn up a Article V incident? Vlad the Invader will demand his .41 Kilo of Flesh. Sooner or Later.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Old and Unimproved. at November 24, 2015 04:14 AM (WVsWD)

547
#Justice4jamar protesters attack and profile people then get shot

https://goo.gl/NpBNd2

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at November 24, 2015 04:27 AM (iQIUe)

548 From the last thread:
She says the way to combat this is beat ISIS on the ground to show they are not invincible, increase electronic surveillance, and treat Islam like a "normal" religion to take away their feeling of Victimhood and drive to be heroic.

 I think this is the thinking in academic circles and therefore the White House. Having no religious life of their own, the cannot fathom that religion could be a motivator for others. They do not want a war of ideas. They do not want to declare western values are superior, or that Islam is fatally flawed

Posted by: ThunderB at November 23, 2015 09:58 PM (zOTsN)

---

Another problem with this "solution" is that it is similar to appeasement. You deal with the lawless by stopping them. You do not coerce lawful people into changing their behavior in the hopes that lawless sociopaths will like you better. It doesn't even work from a pragmatic, let alone moral, perspective.

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at November 24, 2015 04:29 AM (ZdSzs)

549 Hey, Mero -- how are you doing? I wish I weren't so scrambled and I could get up there again soon.

Posted by: cthulhu at November 24, 2015 03:35 AM (EzgxV)


Not having great luck with medicine, and even my distractions (video games) are pissing me off.

So, you know, same old same old.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at November 24, 2015 04:37 AM (bLnSU)

550 Claims that these White prople from last Friday were the same ones to night... though other accounts indicate at least on Asian amongst them...

http://bit.ly/1Lx7ApH

Posted by: The Political Hat at November 24, 2015 04:37 AM (vBeA5)

551 Looking for confirmation now.

Posted by: The Political Fez at November 24, 2015 03:47 AM (vBeA5)


Just about the same thing was reported right after Russia moved into Syria, but was never confirmed.

It may be this time, but something is hinkey with that video (could be post-processing, though).

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at November 24, 2015 04:40 AM (bLnSU)

552 Some shoot-down footage, and some Allahu Akbar. Those people are really something. They just poked a bear with a stick. Idiots.
http://tinyurl.com/ocogmrs

Posted by: goon at November 24, 2015 04:41 AM (gy5kE)

553 Posted by: Bruce Boehner at November 24, 2015 04:29 AM (ZdSzs)

For some reason some people believe they can impose their will on others and just "make them" change their attitudes or behaviors. As if that were a plan instead of a wish.

If your "plan" is to "make people stop fighting" or "make governments spend money better," you don't have a plan at all, you have a wish.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at November 24, 2015 04:44 AM (bLnSU)

554
Confirmed:

Turkey Shoots Down Russian Warplane Near Border With Syria NBCNews.com

Footage from Turkish Haberturk TV showed a warplane going down in flames in a woodland area with a long plume of smoke trailing behind it.

Citing the Kremlin's Defense Ministry, Russian state-run RIA Novosti news agency also reported that a Su-24 had been downed in Turkey near the border with Syria, but said it had been shot down by ground fire. The plane was flying above Syrian territory and not Turkey, according to that report.

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at November 24, 2015 04:44 AM (kdS6q)

555 All I hear is Alah akbar.

Who's side are these goat punchers on?

Posted by: eleven at November 24, 2015 04:45 AM (rjtGa)

556 @550, how trustworthy is that news source? As you know the MSM isn't above creating fictional bogeymen. And as the BLMers morph into a new Klan, I'd find it hard to care if someone actually did respond to them in kind.

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at November 24, 2015 04:46 AM (ZdSzs)

557 We are now stuck in an age when you have to question every news item, because the purveyors lie so much.

There isn't a universally trusted source - and the sources don't reliably check each other. And that's extremely dangerous.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at November 24, 2015 04:49 AM (bLnSU)

558 @550, how trustworthy is that news source? As you know the MSM isn't above creating fictional bogeymen. And as the BLMers morph into a new Klan, I'd find it hard to care if someone actually did respond to them in kind.

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at November 24, 2015 04:46 AM (ZdSzs)


Considering that one of the individuals involved in "White supremacy" are indicated as being Asian, I am skeptical.

https://twitter.com/mrsirbatty/status/669080290346803201

Posted by: The Political Hat at November 24, 2015 04:51 AM (vBeA5)

559 All news sources are suspect. But

You have the blm protesters acting like violent assholes a few days ago.

You have a video of 2 white guys in a car with a gun looking for trouble at least 3 days old.

You have a video of 2 blms describing what happened, i.e., 4 white guys with face covered, videotaping BLMs, attacked, chased, and then white guys fired.

So, bottomline did shooters fire in self defense? Looks like it.

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at November 24, 2015 04:52 AM (iQIUe)

560 #BringBackOurRefugees

Posted by: Bashar al-Assad at November 24, 2015 04:53 AM (ZdSzs)

561 If your "plan" is to "make people stop fighting" or "make governments spend money better," you don't have a plan at all, you have a wish.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith
---
Yes, just like Bill and Hillary's detailed 'solutions':

http://acecomments.mu.nu/?post=360180

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at November 24, 2015 05:02 AM (ZdSzs)

562 WTF is Russia doing. The Turkoman areas of Syria have been a flashpoint with Turkey for 50+ years. I had not heard there was any ISIS activity in that area, and while they might have been anti-Assad; I doubt they were much of a threat to Damascus and would likely have stayed put in their own region.

Does Russia want a division of Turkish troops in Syria on their flank? That's a whole different kind of fight then killing ISIS.

Posted by: Jean at November 24, 2015 05:09 AM (fBkaR)

563 Outstanding article at The New Yorker" Telling the Truth About Raqqa"

http://preview.tinyurl.com/ptg4v79

Actual journalism, Ladies and Gents. Such a rarity these days. And food for thought for the "Level Raqqa because even the ones who aren't ISIS are sympathetic to ISIS" crowd.

Don't get me wrong, I wish it was true and we COULD level Raqqa. But not after reading this.

Posted by: WhatWhatWhat? at November 24, 2015 05:29 AM (HMt16)

564 Reading more, I guess al-Nursa was in the area. I guess Assad/Putin has decided to clean up the little guys before dealing with ISIS.

Posted by: Jean at November 24, 2015 05:29 AM (fBkaR)

565 G'morning, all.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at November 24, 2015 05:47 AM (ptqRm)

566 G'morning VIA, and the rest of the Daywalkers stumbling around in search of that first cup of coffee.

I have come to the inevitable conclusion I need a new IP address.

I still wake up in time to hop into afternoon threads but its not much fun if you can't comment. Kind of like a Mini DrudgeReport that goes into depth.

While its all good I still get tweaked that I can't post.

Posted by: Gmac - Waiting on Columbus at November 24, 2015 06:12 AM (4pjhs)

567
Oh, Ivwon't live to see the final SW movie?

Who. Gives. A. Shit.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at November 24, 2015 06:14 AM (BK3ZS)

568 Hi Gmac,

So how does one about purchasing a new IP address?

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at November 24, 2015 06:15 AM (ptqRm)

569 > I have come to the inevitable conclusion I need a new IP address.

Have you tried rebooting your router? Maybe shutdown for a while to give your provider a chance to hand off the old IP to someone else.

Posted by: fluffy at November 24, 2015 06:15 AM (AfsKp)

570 Locked into a two year contract with the cable company right now and a single IP address just so I can post here is not economically possible.

Posted by: Gmac - Waiting on Columbus at November 24, 2015 06:20 AM (4pjhs)

571 I've done everything under the sun Fluffy, nothing worked mainly because it's the cable company's IP.

Posted by: Gmac - Waiting on Columbus at November 24, 2015 06:22 AM (4pjhs)

572 539 Everybody wants to rule the world. Someday, instead of the Roman and Byzantine empires, we'll have the Pajamaboy and the Clockboy empires.
Posted by: Bruce Boehner



So one empire worship's violence and mayhem, destroying and raping there enemies. The other would rather be cuckolded and cries alot. I think I prefer a zombie future.

Posted by: Puddleglum at November 24, 2015 06:28 AM (ptuLX)

573 Larry Correia: Some Thoughts on Paris

Read the whole thing. Well stated. Good morning everyone...who is awake.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at November 24, 2015 06:32 AM (+bVzV)

574 "2. You won't live to see the final Star Wars movie."

This is undeniably true. It's not a great loss, though, because within the next 20 years all movies will become variations on "Ow My Balls."

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at November 24, 2015 06:33 AM (u5gzz)

575 Jaysus people. IP masquerading. TOR is actually relatively safe if you're not its target market (pirates, criminals, revolutionaries, wannabe revolutionaries, etc).

You may have to try more than one to get a working IP.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at November 24, 2015 06:33 AM (bLnSU)

576 The only problem I have with war between Turkey and Russia is that eventually one of them will win.

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at November 24, 2015 06:36 AM (u5gzz)

577 Fuck the fucking Turks, fuck NATO, and fuck Article V.

Posted by: schizoid at November 24, 2015 06:38 AM (j9HEQ)

578
From the comments for the traumatized Columbia student article -

Canada is Americas lumber yard. The hell do they need schools for?

There's a Platinum AoSHQ membership awaiting the moron or 'ette who can document that they posted this comment.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at November 24, 2015 06:50 AM (BK3ZS)

579 575
Jaysus people. IP masquerading. TOR is actually relatively safe if
you're not its target market (pirates, criminals, revolutionaries,
wannabe revolutionaries, etc).



You may have to try more than one to get a working IP.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith

See that word 'relatively'?
My job rides on the fact that its absolutely not associated with TOR...

Posted by: Gmac - Waiting on Columbus at November 24, 2015 07:01 AM (4pjhs)

580 "Why Does Global Warming Only Turn Muslims Into Terrorists"

I dunno. It seems to turn college students into idiots.

Posted by: Isophorone at November 24, 2015 08:38 AM (JZaLb)

581 I read Vox for Thanksgiving survival tips. Vox Day.

Posted by: Ronsonic at November 24, 2015 09:15 AM (yIVBh)

582 Coming up, Mongo's review of "Rocky 5 .... thousand"!!!!!

Posted by: Russ at November 24, 2015 09:18 AM (pSoT7)

583 If global warming is good for terrorism, why are the IRA and the Red Army Faction in a downward trajectory?

Posted by: Wendy at November 24, 2015 10:13 AM (bpemY)

584 "There are in fact times when it's okay (and even necessary) to hit a woman - to wit: when she's harming others, harming herself and in your own self defense."

Or when she burns the roast.

Posted by: DemosthenesGame at November 24, 2015 10:23 AM (thXAK)

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