Delftsman

December 11, 2009

It Doesn't Matter?!?

I got the following from my sister, and I have to say, it encapsulates everything wrong in our country today. The message is long, so I put it below the fold.

When important principles no longer "matter", than NOTHING matters and we are doomed as a nation. It is OUR fault that matters have come to this pass; we still have time to change this course to destruction that we're pursuing, we have ONEmore election as a free nation to change course, so WAKE UP, GET INVOLVED and

"VOTE THE BUMS OUT!

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 08:31 PM | Comments (212) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Get UP, America !

THIS is a message that should be broadcast LOUD and CLEAR all across America.

Yes, it just seems to be a string of cliches; but cliches are cliches for a reason, they usually are the TRUTH. Kimberly Alyn IS speaking TRUTH here.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 08:11 PM | Comments (17) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Random Thoughts for the Day:

My friend Catfish sent me these "random thoughts" today in an e-mail, I hope you enjoy them as much as I did. I certainly resemble these remarks !

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

There is great need for a sarcasm font.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

Was learning cursive really necessary?

Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

Bad decisions make good stories.

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this -- ever.

I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

I think the freezer deserves a light as well..

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 07:57 PM | Comments (249) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

December 07, 2009

Phone Calls

George Bush, Queen Elizabeth, and Vladimir Putin all die and go to hell. While there, they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth. Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes. When he was finished the devil informs him that the cost is a million dollars, so Putin writes him a check.

Next Queen Elizabeth calls England and talks for 30 minutes. When she was finished the devil informs her that cost is 6 million dollars, so Queen Elizabeth writes him a check.

Finally George Bush gets his turn and talks for 4 hours. When he was finished the devil informed him that there would be no charge for the call and feel free to call the USA anytime.

When Putin hears this he goes ballistic and asks the devil why Bush got to call the USA free. The devil replied, "Since Obama became president of the USA , the country has gone to hell, so it's a local call."

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 11:24 PM | Comments (22) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Surprise visit

Share this with everyone you know. This is what a leader of our country should be doing.

Down in Dothan , AL a man had a TV on in his office when the news of the military base shootings came on. The husband of one of his employees was stationed there. He called her into his office and the minute he told her what was going on, she got a text message from her husband saying, "I am okay." The cell phone started ringing right after that. It was an ER nurse. She said, "I'm the one who just sent you a text, not your husband." She thought the message would be comforting, but she immediately knew she had to let the wife know what was going on. She said, "I am sorry but your husband has been shot 4 times and he is in surgery."

The wife left Southern Clinic in Dothan and drove all night.

Miraculously, here is the photo I just received from my brother that was taken today in the hospital room. He is awake and will recover. His wife, who lives in Dothan , made it to Ft. Hood about the time he was waking up. Thought I'd share this great outcome.

Surprise, in the below picture!!!

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Posted by: Delftsman3 at 11:21 PM | Comments (158) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

December 05, 2009

One rightous rant

Alfonzo Rachel has a rant that "tells it like it is" abouit how we got to where we are right now as a nation; his main point? Liberalism is at the root of most of the problems. I agree 100% with this one.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 03:31 PM | Comments (12) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

The Black Bra (as told by a woman)

I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends.
One is engaged, one is a mistress, and I have been married for 20+ years.

We were chatting about our relationships and decided to amaze our men by greeting them at the door
wearing a black bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our eyes. We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes..

Here's how it all went.

My engaged friend:
The other night when my boyfriend came over he found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask.
He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my dreams.
I love you.' Then we made passionate love all nightlong.

The mistress:
Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing a raincoat, under it only the black bra, heels and
mask over my eyes. When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but he started to tremble and we had wild sex all night.

Then I had to share my story:
When my husband came home I was wearing the black bra,
black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes.
When he came in the door and saw me he said,


"What's for dinner, Batman?"

(wonder what caliber she used when she shot him?)

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 02:59 PM | Comments (11) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

December 04, 2009

Comment Of The Day

"I was heavily moved by President Obama's speech.
However I made it to the waste basket in time." -- GOC

To which I can only respond:

AMEN!

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 03:44 PM | Comments (10) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Lieutenant Colonel Allen West

I wish L.C. Allen West was running for Congress in MY district; he's the 180 degree opposite of the POS Rep. we currently have, Andre Carson.

His point that the Oath that all Service members take has NO statute of Limitations is one that I wish more politicians would take to heart.

For more informtion on Col. West's candidacy, go to: http://allenwestforcongress.com/ Even if you don't belong to his district, I would urge you to support him in whatever manner you can, we need as many like him that we can get in Washington.

H/T to GOC & Rurik for the heads up

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 03:24 PM | Comments (74) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

The Golfers Guide

Most people assume that Tiger Woods' wife randomly chose a club to allegedly beat him with. That's not so. In fact, she (allegedly) chose the perfect club to fit the crime. So to help all you married golfers out there, here's this handy guide.

Photobucket

H/T to Catfish

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 02:56 PM | Comments (535) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

December 03, 2009

Quote of the Day

"They are not to do anything they please to provide for the general welfare.... [G]iving a distinct and independent power to do any act they please which may be good for the Union, would render all the preceding and subsequent enumerations of power completely useless. It would reduce the whole instrument to a single phrase, that of instituting a Congress with power to do whatever would be for the good of the United States; and as they sole judges of the good or evil, it would be also a power to do whatever evil they please." --Thomas Jefferson

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 05:11 PM | Comments (22) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

A BEAUTIFUL MESSAGE ABOUT GROWING OLD


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Scroll below the fold.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 04:31 PM | Comments (19) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Garden snakes are dangerous!

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I didn't think twice about this tiny fellow on my baby boxwood until I got this letter:
GARDEN SNAKES CAN BE DANGEROUS...

Snakes also known as Garter Snakes (Thamnophissirtalis) can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes. Here's why.

A couple in Sweetwater , Texas , had a lot of potted plants. During a recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze.

It turned out that a little green garden grass snake was hidden in one of the plants. When it had warmed up, it slithered out and the wife saw it go under the sofa.

She let out a very loud scream.

The husband (who was taking a shower) ran out into the living room naked to see what the problem was. She told him there was a snake under the sofa.

He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it. About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him on the behind. He thought the snake had bitten him, so he screamed and fell over on the floor.

His wife thought he had had a heart attack, so she covered him up, told him to lie still and called an ambulance.

The attendants rushed in, would not listen to his protests, loaded him on the stretcher, and started carrying him out.

About that time, the snake came out from under the sofa and the Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the stretcher. That's when the man broke his leg and why he is still in the hospital.

The wife still had the problem of the snake in the house, so she called on a neighbor who volunteered to capture the snake. He armed himself with a rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the couch. Soon he decided it was gone and told the woman, who sat down on the sofa in relief.

But while relaxing, her hand dangled in between the cushions, where she felt the snake wriggling around. She screamed and fainted, the snake rushed back under the sofa.

The neighbor man, seeing her lying there passed out, tried to use CPR to revive her.

The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the grocery store, saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and slammed her husband in the back of the head with a bag of canned goods, knocking him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it needed stitches.

The noise woke the woman from her dead faint and she saw her neighbor lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed that the snake had bitten him. She went to the kitchen and got a small bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.

By now, the police had arrived.
Breathe here...

They saw the unconscious man, smelled the whiskey, and assumed that a drunken fight had occurred. They were about to arrest them all, when the women tried to explain how it all happened over a little garden snake!

The police called an ambulance, which took away the neighbor and his sobbing wife.

Now, the little snake again crawled out from under the sofa and one of the policemen drew his gun and fired at it. He missed the snake and hit the leg of the end table. The table fell over, the lamp on it shattered and, as the bulb broke, it started a fire in the drapes.

The other policeman tried to beat out the flames, and fell through the window into the yard on top of the family dog who, startled, jumped out and raced into the street, where an oncoming car swerved to avoid it and smashed into the parked police car.

Meanwhile, neighbors saw the burning drapes and called in the fire department. The firemen had started raising the fire ladder when they were halfway down the street. The rising ladder tore out the overhead wires, put out the power, and disconnected the telephones in a ten-square city block area (but they did get the house fire out).

Time passed! Both men were discharged from the hospital, the house was repaired, the dog came home, the police acquired a new car and all was right with their world.

A while later they were watching TV and the weatherman announced a cold snap for that night. The wife asked her husband if he thought they should bring in their plants for the night.

And that's when he shot her.

P.S. Its been a long time since I laughed that hard at an email! Hope you got a laugh out of it too!


Posted by: Delftsman3 at 04:16 PM | Comments (1183) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

December 02, 2009

A chilling letter

I got this in my e-mail this morning and thought it was worth sharing. I find that I agree with Mr. Pritchett's reasoning 100%...

Lou Pritchett, for nearly 40 years president of Proctor & Gamble did write this - it was ignored by the media, but has hundreds of thousands of hits on the net.

THE LAST SENTENCE IS THE MOST CHILLING

Lou Pritchett is one of corporate America 's true living legends- an acclaimed author, dynamic teacher and one of the world's highest rated speakers. Successful corporate executives everywhere recognize him as the foremost leader in change management. Lou changed the way America does business by creating an audacious concept that came to be known as "partnering." Pritchett rose from soap salesman to Vice-President, Sales and Customer Development for Procter and Gamble and over the course of 36 years, made corporate history.


AN OPEN LETTER TO
PRESIDENT OBAMA

Dear President Obama:

You are the thirteenth President under whom I have lived and unlike any of the others, you truly scare me.

You scare me because after months of exposure, I know nothing about you.

You scare me because I do not know how you paid for your expensive Ivy League education and your upscale lifestyle and housing with no visible signs of support.

You scare me because you did not spend the formative years of youth growing up in America and culturally you are not an American.

You scare me because you have never run a company or met a payroll.

You scare me because you have never had military experience, thus don't understand it at its core.

You scare me because you lack humility and 'class', always blaming others.

You scare me because for over half your life you have aligned yourself with radical extremists who hate America and you refuse to publicly denounce these radicals who wish to see America fail.

You scare me because you are a cheerleader for the 'blame America ' crowd and deliver this message abroad.

You scare me because you want to change America to a European style country where the government sector dominates instead of the private sector.

You scare me because you want to replace our health care system with a government controlled one.

You scare me because you prefer 'wind mills' to responsibly
capitalizing on our own vast oil, coal and shale reserves.

You scare me because you want to kill the American capitalist goose that lays the golden egg which provides the highest standard of living in the world.

You scare me because you have begun to use 'extortion' tactics against certain banks and corporations.

You scare me because your own political party shrinks from
challenging you on your wild and irresponsible spending proposals.

You scare me because you will not openly listen to or even consider opposing points of view from intelligent people.

You scare me because you falsely believe that you are both
omnipotent and omniscient.

You scare me because the media gives you a free pass on everything you do.

You scare me because you demonize and want to silence the
Limbaugh's, Hannitys, O'Reillys and Becks who offer opposing, conservative points of view.

You scare me because you prefer controlling over governing.

Finally, you scare me because if you serve a second term I will probably not feel safe in writing a similar letter in 8 years.

Lou Pritchett

TRUE - CHECK:http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/youscareme.asp


This letter was sent to the NY Times but they never acknowledged it.
Big surprise. Since it hit the internet, however, it has had over
500,000 hits. Keep it going. All that is necessary for evil to succeed
is that good men do nothing.. It's happening right now.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 08:05 PM | Comments (116) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Tiger Woods Humor

With the recent events in Tigers life, you KNOW they wouldn't let it pass without some jokes... For the record, I respect Mr. Woods immensely, for his athletic abilities and his (usually) levelheaded behavior under pressure.

That being said, public figures always risk the danger of being used as foils for humor. That is part and parcel of the conditions of notoriety.
Here are some of the latest quips:

1. Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.

2. What's the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.

3. Tiger Woods wasn't seriously injured in the crash, but he's still below par.

4. What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2.30 in the morning? They went clubbing.

5. Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree. He couldn't decide between a wood and an iron.

6. Perhaps Tiger should be using a driver?

7. This is the first time Tiger's ever failed to drive 300 yards.

8. Apparently, Tiger admitted this crash was the closest shave he's ever had. So Gillette has dropped his contract.

9. Apparently, the only person who can beat Tiger Woods with a golf club is his wife.

10. Ping just offered Elin Woods an endorsement contract pushing her own set of drivers. They said to named Elin Woods..."clubs you can beat Tiger with."

11. Word that Elin Woods was using a golf club as a "Rescue Club" now has been proved to be untrue as it now appears she was actually trying to knock the shit out of a Driver.

12. News travels fast. The Chinese are already making a movie about Tiger Woods' crash. They are calling it, "Scratching Swede, Lying Tiger.

13. What do Tiger Woods & baby seals have in common?
Both get clubbed by Scandanavians.

14. What's the difference between a car and golf ball?
Tiger can drive a golf ball 400 yards.

15. I heard that Tiger got dropped from the Ryder Cup Team due to history of being beaten by Europeans.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 07:24 PM | Comments (2730) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Invitation

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stolen borrowed from Grouchy Old Cripple

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 07:12 PM | Comments (79) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

December 01, 2009

Bearly Political

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Animals that were formerly self-sufficient are now showing signs of belonging to the Democrat Party, as they have apparently learned to just sit and wait for the government to step in and provide for their care and sustenance. This photo is of a Democrat black bear in Montana nicknamed Bearack Obearma. __Guy K

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 07:47 PM | Comments (309) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Rules of the Season

It's time again for "Rules to help you make it through the Holiday
Season".

Enjoy!

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet
table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see
carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum
balls.


2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. Like fine single-malt
scotch, it's rare. In fact, it's even rarer than single-malt scotch. You
can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares
that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to
turn into an eggnog-aholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have
one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!


3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of
gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of
your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.


4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or
whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports
car with an automatic transmission.


5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control
your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat
other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?


6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New
Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do.
This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the
buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of
eggnog.


7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like
frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position
yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before
becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of
shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.


8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or,
if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always
have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor
Day?


9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the
mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have
some standards.


10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party
or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Reread
tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.


Remember this motto to live by:


Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving
safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in
sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly
used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride"!

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 07:11 PM | Comments (522) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

Quote of the Day

"In disquisitions of every kind there are certain primary truths, or first principles, upon which all subsequent reasoning must depend." --Alexander Hamilton

We seem to have forgotten some of those "certain primary truths or first principles" in today's "situationaly ethical" political world, and until we rediscover those Truths and Principles, we will continue to flounder as a nation and fail to uphold our heritage. The time grows short to when we reach a point where we cannot regain our strength and promise without a violent civil uprising, I pray we can pull ourselves back from the precipice without that being the case, but it will take all of us to stop and examine just where we are heading before it's too late.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 06:55 PM | Comments (631) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

It's CHRISTMAS Season

With all the bustle and hustle trying to get ready for the parties, gifts, and general to-do surrounding this season; a lot of people have forgotten the reason for the season...

I'm not a religious person;I don't subscribe to any of the major religious traditions even though I was raised Catholic in my childhood days and attended a Protestant church all through my teens, these days I consider myself a Deist. I respect the beliefs of others as their own path to Deity (with the exception of the death cult that is Islam). I respect the ideas associated with Christmas without wanting to generally participate in the religious rituals associated with it.

The following video might help you to remember the REASON behind the Season..and folks, it AIN'T about who can afford the most expensive toys or throw the best party...

The PC crowd would have you celebrate a "Winter Holiday", lest those of (over)sensitive natures feel left out or somehow ignored...but the fact remains that the real reason for the season comes from a Christian belief tradition.
That doesn't mean you can't enjoy the holiday if you don't follow the same traditions; but you shouldn't forget that tradition either, or feel offended by those that do follow it.

Relax, and if nothing else, enjoy the spirit of goodwill and kindness that accompanies that tradition.

Posted by: Delftsman3 at 06:32 PM | Comments (134) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)

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