Tucker Carlson: Algebra Is a Jewish Plot to Confuse the Goys by Sticking Letters Into Math

Tucker Carlson used to posture as an intellectual. An intellectual who was not so far up his ass that he couldn't see practical reality or the real problems of citizens, but an intellectual nonetheless.

He never actually was an intellectual. But he did pose as one.

He's decided that Real Nationalist Socialism Populism requires its agitators to be dumb as Hasan Piker and now declares that nobody -- including engineers, pilots, ship captains, etc. -- really needs algebra.

It's a scam created by Jews to distract the goys while the Jews rule the world (without algebra, we assume).

Tucker Carlson has found a new hill to die on. Not only does he hate the Jews and blame Israel for every terrible thing that's happened on Earth, but he's now perplexed by the presence of letters in basic algebra.
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In an interview released Monday, Carlson spent two hours talking to Jess Elofson, an artist, potter/ceramicist, welder, and Ford collector who lives on a farm in South Dakota. Why he deserved an interview is unclear, but the pair discussed art, beauty, politics, and, of course, why "You're good little goy slaves" if you think algebra has any real-world application. How did they come to that conclusion? Because Elofson claimed to have never used it in constructing a wood-fired kiln.
"Why does algebra put letters into numbers?" Carlson asked.
"I think just to f**k with you," Elofson said.
"So you deal with math in your job every day. You've already, I think, demonstrated your grasp of math is high"
"I mean, functional math. Yeah, yeah, for sure."
"Well, if you can build a wood-fired kiln, you understand math," Carlson said. "But you didn't add letters to numbers in the process of doing that?"
"That's the weirdest thing," Elofson replied. "Nowhere did I find any letters in my math to calculate the size and structural integrity of a cantonary arch. Isn't that weird? Oh, that was weird. Because every math teacher was always like, you need to know some algebra. I've yet to encounter a single person in my life that uses algebra."
"Actually?" Carlson asked.
"Have you?"
"Yeah, but I mean, I live in a fake world," the former Fox News host said.
"That's why you use fake math with letters. Congratulations to everybody out there in the matrix. Good job. You're good little goy slaves," Elofson said.
"That's amazing."
Of course, this is the man who claims to have the best interests of conservatism at heart, although he doesn't identify as one anymore, except when it's convenient.

Tucker Carlson asks why algebra puts letters into numbers.

Jess Elofson explains: "I think just to fuck with you."

They discuss how they've never met anyone in their life who uses algebra, which is "fake math" for people "in the matrix."

They conclude that caring about algebra… pic.twitter.com/p6VKLrgrLd
— Max 📟 (@MaxNordau) September 7, 2026

Actually algebra was not invented by the Jews but by Tuq'r's fellow Muslims.

Tucker Carlson (1.9 GPA at Trinity) says that Ben Shapiro (UCLA summa cum laude at 20, Harvard Law cum laude at 23) is low IQ and couldn't have possibly been admitted on merit—so it MUST have been a conspiracy.

He also calls Shapiro "hyper-aggressive, selfish, small-minded,… https://t.co/bprlmBi1VA pic.twitter.com/sdZS97tMZ4
— Max 📟 (@MaxNordau) September 7, 2026

Tucker Carlson COMPLETELY CONTRADICTING HIMSELF over and over again for 4 and a 1/2 minutes.

Tucker Carlson: "I try to be transparent so I don't have to keep track of different storylines or lies."

Also Tucker Carlson: pic.twitter.com/Ppt7tfyVmE
— Nathan Livingstone (MilkBarTV) (@TheMilkBarTV) September 8, 2026

Posted by: Disinformation Expert Ace at 04:30 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 1st

Posted by: GF at September 08, 2026 04:31 PM (v3Cf2)

2 Math h8er?
New look at Tucker?

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 04:31 PM (odBC9)

3 I haven't watched Tucker in years. Is he Absolutely Looney Tunes?

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 04:33 PM (odBC9)

4 Math is racist!

Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at September 08, 2026 04:33 PM (I43vL)

5 What does this have to do with Nicolas Cages' porta-potty?

Posted by: wth at September 08, 2026 04:33 PM (UjdFS)

6 "if you can build a wood-fired kiln, you understand math"

I don't get it.

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 04:33 PM (Jr5Lq)

7 I still like him though. He’s a good bro.
- JD Vance

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:34 PM (U1NLK)

8 Tucker is truly impressive. The best actor cannot go up on stage or do as many interviews as he did, extemporaneously, as well as he did posing as a conservative.

What kind of brain can be so believably deceptive?

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 04:34 PM (AJWch)

9 Brain tumor. I'm calling it. Carlson has a brain tumor.

Posted by: Orson at September 08, 2026 04:34 PM (dIske)

10 I have to take a Tucker and wipe my Carlson.

Posted by: Uranus at September 08, 2026 04:34 PM (Z8Kuq)

11 Geometry is where it's at.

Posted by: Abigail Shapiro, probably at September 08, 2026 04:34 PM (wVcYX)

12 α and ω, tucker!! (Letters used in algebra.)

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 04:34 PM (odBC9)

13
Isn't this pretty close to what Gabby Giffords's nutjob shooter claimed? Grammar is a conspiracy?

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 08, 2026 04:34 PM (XJ22o)

14 I was right about algebra. I never used it after school (that I'm aware of).

Posted by: hobbitopoly at September 08, 2026 04:35 PM (ZgwKJ)

15 Now ace, don't join the mob mau-mauing poor Tucker just because he's an idiot who has shown just how clueless he is. It will drive away the high quality guests who would otherwise do his show. He only had a brief period of adequacy because of the utter wasteland that is mainstream "media". Imagine actually interviewing the Capitol Police chief about January 6 (something the bogus committee "investigating" it didn't do, incredibly). And so on.

But once he stopped letting his better guests just talk, well. That Vance is a friend with such a fucking cretin is no surprise, but still damning.

Posted by: rhomboid at September 08, 2026 04:35 PM (U/Byj)

16 "You're good little goy slaves," Elofson said."

They aren't even trying to hide it any longer. We are fast approaching levels of public Jew hatred from the mid 1930s in germany.

Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at September 08, 2026 04:35 PM (I43vL)

17 Talking about math on the blog is a way to normalize math on the blog.

We approve.

* wing flaps in unison *

Posted by: Big Penguin at September 08, 2026 04:35 PM (0sNs1)

18 Wait - - first they tell me that algebra was invented by Muslims -- and now they tell me that it's a Jewish plot?

MAKE UP YOUR MINDS.

Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2026 04:35 PM (Av6i5)

19 Guess Tucker is living proof about the horseshoe theory of politics.

Posted by: Thrawn at September 08, 2026 04:36 PM (oPFtC)

20 Trump posted his presidential greatness chart and the thing I find interesting his failures list is mostly recent presidents:

Biden, Obama, Shrub, Harding, Carter, Hoover

I would move Shrub up to "below average" and move LBJ and Buchanan to Failure

But...we've certainly had more bad president in the last 100 years then in the first 150

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:36 PM (sKqQm)

21 Math is hard!

Posted by: Barbie 5'9", 36-18-33, 32E, Waist-Hip Ratio 0.55, Inseam 36", BMI 16.24 at September 08, 2026 04:36 PM (wVcYX)

22 They use arithmetic.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at September 08, 2026 04:36 PM (Cqx++)

23 7 I still like him though. He’s a good bro.
- JD Vance
Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:34 PM (U1NLK)

Well, me, myself, I wouldn't want JD to turn on a dime on long-time friends. Also: Tucker would LOVE that.

#me

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 04:36 PM (odBC9)

24 That's hilarious.

I guess Tucker's more a spell 'BOOBIES' on the calculator type of guy.

Posted by: Stateless - keeping 15 year Ralphy happy and alive. Puppy at heart at September 08, 2026 04:36 PM (Sco7b)

25 > Nowhere did I find any letters in my math to calculate the size and structural integrity of a cantonary arch.

You didn't calculate the span, rise, and radius of the arch? You didn't calculate the sum of horizontal and vertical forces on the support blocks? You didn't calculate the compressive stress vs the allowable stress of the materials?

I have doubts you calculated the size and structural integrity of the arch if you didn't do those things.

Posted by: bonhomme at September 08, 2026 04:36 PM (mkw2N)

26 I use algebra on a regular basis.

I use geometry rarely

And I don't think I've used trig since I left formal schooling.

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:37 PM (sKqQm)

27 Has Tucker interviewed Roger Waters yet? They're in the same 'neighborhood' now. Him and RW can go to the Troof of 9/11 conference. Apparently that's a thing and it's happening this week. Not sure where. Probably NYC. That terrorist fan boy muslim mayor will probably go to that, if its in NYC.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at September 08, 2026 04:37 PM (sAmhv)

28 So the unknowns should be represented by what, numbers rather than words?

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at September 08, 2026 04:37 PM (XvL8K)

29 Just wait until Tuqur finds out about calculus.

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:37 PM (U1NLK)

30 Why does TuCa do what he does? Here's the reason:

"The Tucker Carlson Show averages roughly 56.8 million views per episode across combined podcast and social media platforms, placing it among the top-tier digital media programs in the country"

What he does, it gets clicks.

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 04:37 PM (Jr5Lq)

31 Guess Tucker is living proof about the horseshoe theory of politics.
Posted by: Thrawn at September 08, 2026 04:36 PM (oPFtC)

Yeah you get kicked by one too many times it affects your brain.

Posted by: Oldcat at September 08, 2026 04:38 PM (uhVAy)

32 A lot of conspiracy theories sound crazy. This is just stupid.

Posted by: Biergood at September 08, 2026 04:38 PM (PwgSL)

33 C'mon, Algibber, this is no place for you.

Posted by: Stymie Beard at September 08, 2026 04:38 PM (Fn+3X)

34 It's not a TOOMAH !

Posted by: Tuckernegger at September 08, 2026 04:38 PM (UjdFS)

35 There's ignorance, and then there's hyper-ignorance.

Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2026 04:38 PM (Av6i5)

36 a squared + b squared = c squared

that is useful math when squaring a foundation.

Posted by: illiniwek at September 08, 2026 04:38 PM (vbXSk)

37 Why does TuCa do what he does? Here's the reason:

"The Tucker Carlson Show averages roughly 56.8 million views per episode across combined podcast and social media platforms, placing it among the top-tier digital media programs in the country"

What he does, it gets clicks.
Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 04:37 PM (Jr5Lq)

From Oman and Pakistan, sure.

Posted by: Oldcat at September 08, 2026 04:38 PM (uhVAy)

38 Tuqur Al-Gebra

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:38 PM (U1NLK)

39 21 Math is hard!
Posted by: Barbie 5'9", 36-18-33, 32E, Waist-Hip Ratio 0.55, Inseam 36", BMI 16.24 at September 08, 2026 04:36 PM (wVcYX)

haha!

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 04:38 PM (odBC9)

40 Geometry is where it's at.
Posted by: Abigail Shapiro,

Volume of a cone = 1/3*h*3.14*( r )squared.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at September 08, 2026 04:39 PM (mqudn)

41 You can't appreciate properly young B-cup or larger ladies walking or jogging free without partial-differential equations.

Posted by: Wesley Crusher at September 08, 2026 04:39 PM (0sNs1)

42 Ok Tucker you can get 3 juices for $1 or 4 for $1.5. Without using algebra which one do you pick?

Tucker: I don't want any juice in my house.

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:39 PM (sKqQm)

43 Hoo boy, am I tired of Tucker Carlson.

Posted by: Tuna at September 08, 2026 04:39 PM (lJ0H4)

44 His line is that meritocracy is a Hebrew plot to exclude Christian Men from achievement.

Posted by: runner at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (AKptf)

45 A lot of modern historians are saying that Algebra was probably invented by Indians and swiped by Arabs. I would not call them "Muslims" in any case, they were about as Muslim as Bill Nye is a Christian: they were in a place culturally and officially a certain religion.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (K32Fz)

46 He lost his mind when he wrestled with the demon. I know it sounds like I’m kidding…. I’m not

BTW…. I assume the no-maths rule of the blog is temporarily suspended for this post?

To infinity… and beyond!

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (gkBVP)

47 I honestly have to think that demonic possession slowly eats away at your brain at this point.

Posted by: Formerly Virginian at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (N1tpc)

48 You know who else hated algebra?

Posted by: Duke Lowell at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (u73oe)

49 Brain tumor. I'm calling it. Carlson has a brain tumor.
Posted by: Orson at September 08, 2026 04:34 PM (dIske)

-----------------

Could it be a brain worm like RFK Jr had?

Posted by: Decaf at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (ZNpJk)

50 Jumped the shark, he has.

Posted by: nurse ratched at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (W2Pud)

51 Uh... just about ANY math equation used in the real world has variables you replace with real world numbers...

Thus taking the Letter, and replacing it with a number...

And yes, as an Electronics guy? E= I R.. used a bunch.

Posted by: Romeo13 at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (mP0Kj)

52 Isn't this pretty close to what Gabby Giffords's nutjob shooter claimed? Grammar is a conspiracy?
Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 08, 2026 04:34 PM (XJ22o)
______________________________

Oh, wow...I remember that crap. I fell down a rabbithole reading about it. There is some theory "quantum grammer" that the Govt. uses grammar to progress mind control. The guy's solution was to use your own grammar to thwart the government's plan.

I remember telling on of my friends, who had a few drinks in him, so for the rest of the evening he was purposefully using bad grammar and following every purposeful mis-use with "YOU WON'T CONTROL ME, ASSHOLE!!!"

We were drinking, so it was funny.

Posted by: Orson at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (dIske)

53 traded in his extra common sense for absolute fiction and ability to hold a straight face while speaking absolute BS

Posted by: gov't here to help at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (cqrFc)

54 Let x = stupid goyim

Let y = clever Jews

If x > y, then why is Tucker Carlson so retarded?

Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2026 04:41 PM (Av6i5)

55 He lost his mind when he wrestled with the demon. I know it sounds like I’m kidding…. I’m not

Out: We are legion

In: We are Barbie

/MATH IS HARD!

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:41 PM (sKqQm)

56 One, two, many.

Posted by: Piraha peoples of the Amazon at September 08, 2026 04:41 PM (wVcYX)

57 43 Ok Tucker you can get 3 juices for $1 or 4 for $1.5. Without using algebra which one do you pick?

Tucker: I don't want any juice in my house.
Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:39 PM (sKqQm)

He has Swanson F-you money. He don't care.

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 04:41 PM (odBC9)

58 And yes, as an Electronics guy? E= I R.. used a bunch.
Posted by: Romeo13 at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (mP0Kj)

Is that you, Ohm?

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at September 08, 2026 04:42 PM (gkBVP)

59 >>>That Vance is a friend with such a fucking cretin is no surprise, but still damning.

Posted by: rhomboid
---

I don't understand.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 04:42 PM (AJWch)

60 Maybe he should go back to the "bow-tie"? Pretty sure Tucker just wants a paycheck. Terrorists banging on his door, while he wasn't there scared him.

Posted by: pahound at September 08, 2026 04:42 PM (AjR4+)

61 31 Why does TuCa do what he does? Here's the reason:

"The Tucker Carlson Show averages roughly 56.8 million views per episode across combined podcast and social media platforms, placing it among the top-tier digital media programs in the country"

What he does, it gets clicks.
Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 04:37 PM (Jr5Lq)

I think it's time to validate who is clicking what...

Would be very easy to get a bot farm to make something seem way more popular, then it really is.

Posted by: Romeo13 at September 08, 2026 04:42 PM (mP0Kj)

62 I haven't watched Tucker in years. Is he Absolutely Looney Tunes?

All the clips I have seen indicate that. I have never watched any of his shows but I have seen a lot of clips over the years going back to watching Eichenwald with his hilarious binder "full of answers" he never used.

Funny how that dude just disappeared. Wonder what happened to him behind the scenes.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 04:42 PM (K32Fz)

63 35 It's not a TOOMAH !
Posted by: Tuckernegger at September 08, 2026 04:38 PM (UjdFS)

2mah, mathily.

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 04:42 PM (odBC9)

64 And I don't think I've used trig since I left formal schooling.

I used trig a lot back when I used to do ray-traced images with POVRay. Also when putting in the flooring on the stairs in my house around corners. If you want to know distances and/or angles, it’s extremely useful.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at September 08, 2026 04:43 PM (VJ1er)

65 To get from one side of the room to the other you have to go 1/2 way across the room. Then 1/2 way from there. The 1/2 way and so on and so on.

It’s an infinite number of 1/2 ways. So how can you ever reach the other side?

Calculus solved that. Or as Tuqur would say, the Jews control the room

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:43 PM (U1NLK)

66 Solving differential equations, or even doing basic algebra is probably beyond me at this point. And the average man doesn't need that math much, so I'll leave it to the engineers to 'splain to me how they are used. I know relativity is pretty important to understand in practical space missions ....

Posted by: illiniwek at September 08, 2026 04:43 PM (vbXSk)

67 There is a theory that language does constrain the way we think about the world the Sapir–Whorf hypothesis. Its a plot point in the movie Arrival.

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:43 PM (sKqQm)

68 You know who else hated algebra?

I heard he especially hated the μs.

Posted by: Archimedes at September 08, 2026 04:43 PM (Riz8t)

69 I'm confident with algebra, but, god help me, I never could figure out how to actuarially increase a joint and contingent annuity.

Posted by: Oglebay at September 08, 2026 04:43 PM (2ap+5)

70 Pssst -- don't even mention Minkowski Inequalities. I think Tuq'r's head would explode.

Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2026 04:43 PM (Av6i5)

71 Even if all the views Tuqur gets are bots from Pakistan he still gets paid.

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:43 PM (U1NLK)

72 In Nancy Pelosi's battle against Young's Modulus, Young's Modulus is winning.

Posted by: Wesley Crusher at September 08, 2026 04:44 PM (0sNs1)

73 "Nowhere did I find any letters in my math to calculate the size and structural integrity of a cantonary arch.

Shouldn't that be catenary arch?

You didn't calculate the span, rise, and radius of the arch? You didn't calculate the sum of horizontal and vertical forces on the support blocks? You didn't calculate the compressive stress vs the allowable stress of the materials?

I have doubts you calculated the size and structural integrity of the arch if you didn't do those things.
Posted by: bonhomme

Casting my mind back into the mists of architecture school, I think you can get the proper structural shape for catenary arches by draping chains, rather than calculation.

Posted by: FeatherBlade at September 08, 2026 04:44 PM (vJrRc)

74 He has Swanson F-you money. He don't care.

THE JOKE IS JUICE SOUNDS LIKE JEWS

Posted by: Big Ben at September 08, 2026 04:44 PM (sKqQm)

75 47 To infinity… and beyond!
Posted by: LinusVanPelt at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (gkBVP)

∞ +

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 04:44 PM (odBC9)

76 What he does, it gets clicks.

But 90% of those clicks are from Pakistan and places like Iran. I don't know if they still are but Iranian state TV was running Tucker stuff back to back a few weeks ago. He doesn't really have much of a fan base in the US. He goes where the money is, like Milo.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 04:44 PM (K32Fz)

77 truthsocial.com @CitizenFreePress
TheTaliban's haul of American military hardware 5 years on

https://tinyurl.com/3we6vpma

2 minutes report

Posted by: Skip at September 08, 2026 04:44 PM (Ia/+0)

78 Speaking of NANC Pelosi she will go down as one of the worst speakers we've had but one of the top stock traders in the history of the world...

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:45 PM (sKqQm)

79 Let X be the number of times that Tucker is just asking questions. Let Y be the number of retarded guests. Then it follows that X > Y and dX/dt > 0…. Furthermore, as t —> /inf, Tucker’s brain converges to porridge. QED.

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at September 08, 2026 04:45 PM (gkBVP)

80 Well, me, myself, I wouldn't want JD to turn on a dime on long-time friends.

==

I want to address this , since Vance used it to dodge the real issue, does Vance think that Carlson belongs in the Conservative, MAGA movement and does he think his good friend's ideas belong in the movement. Somebody should ask him. In fact, I think it's time JD Vance accepted Ben Shapiro's invite to interview him. He's been avoiding that particular interview for some reason.

Posted by: runner at September 08, 2026 04:45 PM (AKptf)

81 I used trig in the machine shop. Sometimes we set cutting tools off-center to reduce chatter. When you do that, the depth of cut is shallower than what you dialed in. With trig, I gave them the formula to calculate the correct dial depth setting.

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 04:45 PM (Jr5Lq)

82 This is what I have been missing?

Posted by: Hokey Pokey at September 08, 2026 04:45 PM (wxsGM)

83 I never could figure out how to actuarially increase a joint and contingent annuity.

I’m guessing that the reason financial equations were built into calculators almost from the start, despite practically no one needing them, is because the few who needed those functions, couldn’t figure it out either.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at September 08, 2026 04:46 PM (VJ1er)

84 T'qur is a lunatic

Posted by: Skip at September 08, 2026 04:46 PM (Ia/+0)

85 Looks like Canada is about to bring some serious pain onto the US, thanks to Trump. Enacting retaliatory tariffs and partnering with China instead of the US are power moves. The world order is changing.

Posted by: Sid at September 08, 2026 04:46 PM (2J5h1)

86 Irony would be a crazed leftist taking out Tucker because he thinks Tucker is some kind of conservative hero

Posted by: Smell the Glove at September 08, 2026 04:46 PM (v6vok)

87 69 You know who else hated algebra?

I heard he especially hated the μs.
Posted by: Archimedes at September 08, 2026 04:43 PM (Riz8t)

mu's?

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 04:46 PM (odBC9)

88 Solving differential equations, or even doing basic algebra is probably beyond me at this point. And the average man doesn't need that math much, so I'll leave it to the engineers to 'splain to me how they are used. I know relativity is pretty important to understand in practical space missions ....

It is true that most people won't use much of the math they learn in school, but there are reasons to study it anyway.

1) Train your brain for rigor. Few things make you think harder.
2) As a society, we need an educational filter for intelligence, and math is a good one. You should learn early on whether you're suited to STEM or something else.
3) Any successful modern society requires math competence in a portion of the population.

Posted by: Archimedes at September 08, 2026 04:47 PM (Riz8t)

89 Tucker Carlson is an imbecile. Thatisall.

Posted by: Brother Tim is tired at September 08, 2026 04:47 PM (OUMaO)

90 70 I'm confident with algebra, but, god help me, I never could figure out how to actuarially increase a joint and contingent annuity.
Posted by: Oglebay at September 08, 2026 04:43 PM (2ap+5)

Now the math is getting scary.

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 04:47 PM (odBC9)

91 Irony would be a crazed leftist taking out Tucker because he thinks Tucker is some kind of conservative hero
Posted by: Smell the Glove at September 08, 2026 04:46 PM (v6vok)

They know he is one of them! He keeps supporting their candidates!

Posted by: runner at September 08, 2026 04:47 PM (AKptf)

92 I think Nick Cage has more discretion about what he does for money than Tucker Carlson.

(SWIDT? I crossed the streams!!)

Posted by: Egon at September 08, 2026 04:47 PM (anL5R)

93 Every carpenter uses algebra every day.

Posted by: ballistic at September 08, 2026 04:47 PM (oqH4h)

94 I hated all math. I only took as much in high school that allowed me to get into college.

Posted by: Tuna at September 08, 2026 04:47 PM (lJ0H4)

95 When trying to determine the height of something you're standing a known distance away from, knowledge of trigonometry is central, not merely tangent, to the solution.

Posted by: Wesley Crusher at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM (0sNs1)

96 I thought moose limbs created algebra.

To have an 1.9 average is pathetic. His IQ is in the double digits. He also looks dumb, so there's that.

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM (hzuYO)

97 I axed Gemini "How much of Tucker's traffic is bot-generated?"

He gave me a looong answer that boils down to 'it's anybody's guess.' Gee, thanks, Mr Smarty Pants AI!

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM (Jr5Lq)

98 42 You can't appreciate properly young B-cup or larger ladies walking or jogging free without partial-differential equations.
Posted by: Wesley Crusher at September 08, 2026 04:39 PM (0sNs1)

In case it still needs to be said ...

SHUT UP WESLEY !!!

Posted by: browndog says woof at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM (oCio0)

99 It is amazing to see the site pest cheering on Canuckistan tanking their economy MORE and partnering with China. But at least China doesn't stop the government from paying for tranny surgeries for kids...oh wait...it does.

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM (sKqQm)

100 Jewish mathematicians: Revolutionize physics, cosmology, and engineering. bringing mankind from the Dark Ages to an unimaginable future.

Tucker Carlson: Dohhhh, math too hard, me no like.

Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM (Av6i5)

101 I have no idea what 'goy' means. I keep seeing it being used against Jews by the usual suspects of loons.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM (sAmhv)

102 Canada is a pimple on America’s ass Sid.
You’re too gullible to Chinese propaganda to know any better. Canada could disappear tomorrow and nobody would notice. But they’ll inflict pain. lol.

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM (U1NLK)

103 OMG the troll doesn't come her for the hunting does it.

Posted by: Egon at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM (anL5R)

104 75 He has Swanson F-you money. He don't care.

THE JOKE IS JUICE SOUNDS LIKE JEWS
Posted by: Big Ben at September 08, 2026 04:44 PM (sKqQm)

Ah.

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 04:49 PM (odBC9)

105 I was right about algebra. I never used it after school (that I'm aware of).
Posted by: hobbitopoly at September 08, 2026 04:35 PM (ZgwKJ)

.... you've never had to figure out dimensions for something you're building when you only have part of the measurements?

I mean, people who do engineering and architecture and chemistry and physics and pharmacy and (insert other math intensive professions) will use it more (I do statistics and analysis at times, so I use it as well), but if you do even something as relatively simple as landscaping, you will likely be using it.

Posted by: Formerly Virginian at September 08, 2026 04:49 PM (N1tpc)

106 'scuse me while I do this Laplace Transform

Posted by: ballistic at September 08, 2026 04:49 PM (oqH4h)

107 Tucker is approaching Peak Stupid at Ludicrous Speed.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at September 08, 2026 04:49 PM (9iRTe)

108 In Nancy Pelosi's battle against Young's Modulus, Young's Modulus is winning.
Posted by: Wesley Crusher at September 08, 2026 04:44 PM (0sNs1)

Ptosis, even.

Posted by: Count de Monet at September 08, 2026 04:49 PM (wVcYX)

109 …but there are reasons to study it anyway.

Also, a lot of them, you don’t need to know them, just that they exist. When you need them, you can look them up, or realize that it’s worthwhile to call a friend who might remember how to do them.

And so that you don’t think it’s joo magic when someone else does use it.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at September 08, 2026 04:49 PM (VJ1er)

110 You can't appreciate properly young B-cup or larger ladies walking or jogging free without partial-differential equations.

The algorithm gave me a video of a young woman who shuffle dances and pretty clearly isn't wearing a bra. Her top parts move more and faster then her legs...

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:49 PM (sKqQm)

111 Guess Tucker is living proof about the ~~horseshoe~~ horse's ass theory of politics.

Suggested edit.

Posted by: Oddbob at September 08, 2026 04:49 PM (vTZFs)

112 I only took as much in high school that allowed me to get into college.
Posted by: Tuna at September 08, 2026 04:47 PM (lJ0H4)

LOL, I purposefully chose a major (advertising) that would not require that I take calculus, algebra, trig, etc. Unfortunately, it did require statistics which I had to take twice.

Posted by: hobbitopoly at September 08, 2026 04:50 PM (ZgwKJ)

113 If you want to know whether a corner is square, just remember 3-4-5!

Posted by: Oglebay at September 08, 2026 04:50 PM (2ap+5)

114 Watch that link to get your blood boiling

Posted by: Skip at September 08, 2026 04:50 PM (Ia/+0)

115 I have no idea what 'goy' means. I keep seeing it being used against Jews by the usual suspects of loons.

Its like Haole or Gaijin or Gwailo, etc. Its "not one of us" in a semi-pejorative sense. The thing is, I see non-Jews using it a lot more than Jews.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 04:50 PM (K32Fz)

116 Our political landscape is a total mess.

Posted by: Unkaren at September 08, 2026 04:50 PM (wBxGS)

117 Tucker having 1.9 isn’t shocking. Rich kid alcoholic who didn’t care about grades knowing he’d never have to apply for a job in his life.

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:50 PM (U1NLK)

118 It is funny watching the left complain about sekret JOO conspiracies and the need to ethnically cleanse the middle east all while calling everyone they don't like a NAZI

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:50 PM (sKqQm)

119 > Casting my mind back into the mists of architecture school, I think you can get the proper structural shape for catenary arches by draping chains, rather than calculation.

Assuming that's true, and I believe you, that's a heuristic, not a calculation. It doesn't verify the structural integrity. If the heuristic is generally reliable, you can probably assume to a reasonable degree that it's structurally sound, but the math is more reliable.

Posted by: bonhomme at September 08, 2026 04:50 PM (mkw2N)

120 Yeah, Sid, we should just continue to let Canada to be the CCP's laundromat for their industrial dumping.

And "serious pain"? Please.

Posted by: Thrawn at September 08, 2026 04:51 PM (oPFtC)

121 Solving differential equations, or even doing basic algebra is probably beyond me at this point. And the average man doesn't need that math much, so I'll leave it to the engineers to 'splain to me how they are used. I know relativity is pretty important to understand in practical space missions ....
Posted by: illiniwek at September 08, 2026 04:43 PM (vbXSk)

If you need to change the number of people you make a recipe for, you are using algebra. If you want to know how many six packs you need at the game party with the bros, same.

Posted by: Oldcat at September 08, 2026 04:51 PM (uhVAy)

122 I have no idea what 'goy' means. I keep seeing it being used against Jews by the usual suspects of loons.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come

The term basically means non-Jews (gentiles). I think there's an implication of some level of subservience, intentional or not.

Posted by: Brother Tim is tired at September 08, 2026 04:51 PM (OUMaO)

123 Anthropologists discovered a tribe in the South Pacific that was so primitive that they had a grand total of four numerals:

One
Two
Three
Many.

They hadn't even progressed to the level of counting all the fingers on one hand yet.

Tucker did Ancestry.com and it said both his parents came from that tribe.

Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2026 04:51 PM (Av6i5)

124 The algorithm gave me a video of a young woman who shuffle dances and pretty clearly isn't wearing a bra. Her top parts move more and faster then her legs...
==
the algo knows you very well

Posted by: Hey Now at September 08, 2026 04:51 PM (anL5R)

125 Tucker is rather derivative.

Posted by: Tex Lovera at September 08, 2026 04:51 PM (wtvvX)

126 3) Any successful modern society requires math competence in a portion of the population.
Posted by: Archimedes at September 08, 2026 04:47 PM

Naw, man. Disallowing innumeracy is a cispatriarcal way of stopping equality and diversity!

Posted by: L'Quisha Jones at September 08, 2026 04:51 PM (0sNs1)

127 I have no idea what 'goy' means. I keep seeing it being used against Jews by the usual suspects of loons.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM

It's an anti semitic slur.

Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at September 08, 2026 04:51 PM (I43vL)

128 Sid isn’t just retarded. He’s CNN watcher retarded.

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:52 PM (U1NLK)

129 If you want to know how many six packs you need at the game party with the bros, same.

If you want to know how long it takes to go sixty miles when you’re going sixty miles an hour…

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at September 08, 2026 04:52 PM (VJ1er)

130 "Train your brain for rigor."

I do about ten chess puzzles a day. And yes, I have a book of algebra brain-teasers right on my desktop. Last time I solved a set was ... June 18 2026. Gotta get back on that horse.

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 04:52 PM (Jr5Lq)

131 Germany did the most infamous own-goal by kicking out all their top scientists prior to World War II.

England was most accommodating and encouraged them to emigrate there. Would they do the same thing today, is a question.

The U.S.A. poached a bunch of top flight theoretical physicists as well, many of them Jews. Later, somebody asked a top German official how the scientific community was getting along. "It isn't" was the reply. Oops.

Posted by: Spring In My Step at September 08, 2026 04:52 PM (+/Ezd)

132 102 I have no idea what 'goy' means. I keep seeing it being used against Jews by the usual suspects of loons.
Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM (sAmhv)
----

I think in the literal 'goy' just means a non-Jew.

But now it's being deployed so that goyxxxxxxxx just means "anything The Jews feed to the non-Jews so that The Jews stay in control and everyone else just accepts that The Jews run the world.

It's fucking retarded.

Posted by: ballistic at September 08, 2026 04:52 PM (oqH4h)

133 you've never had to figure out dimensions for something you're building when you only have part of the measurements?

Yeah people use algebra quite often, they just don't see it in terms of formulae. They see it in practice, where it makes sense.

Math's biggest advantage isn't the way you'll use it later on, its that it forces you to think in an orderly, systematic manner: it teaches logic

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 04:53 PM (K32Fz)

134 3x+4y=12 is a Jewish plot??

Posted by: dantesed at September 08, 2026 04:53 PM (p3pWU)

135 Every farmer uses algebra. And geometry.

Posted by: runner at September 08, 2026 04:53 PM (AKptf)

136 But it's totes OK that he's JD Vance's BFF, you guys.

Posted by: Delurker at September 08, 2026 04:53 PM (2Drhq)

137 "You can't appreciate properly young B-cup or larger ladies walking or jogging free without partial-differential equations."

My inner Hatemonger is coming out... "Boobies...are evil! We musn't look at boobies!".

Posted by: Thrawn at September 08, 2026 04:53 PM (oPFtC)

138 Goy - i think for orthodox, they can't do any work on sabbath, they need someone who can - simple things, take out the garbage, flush the toilet, stuff like that. At least that's what some guy who lived in NYC an age ago said he got paid to do for a local orthodox family. He was the goy.

Posted by: Hey Now at September 08, 2026 04:53 PM (anL5R)

139 As x approaches 0, Sid’s retardation approaches infinity.

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:54 PM (U1NLK)

140 Looks like Canada is about to bring some serious pain onto the US, thanks to Trump. Enacting retaliatory tariffs and partnering with China instead of the US are power moves. The world order is changing.
Posted by: Sid at September 08, 2026 04:46 PM (2J5h1)

Putting Canada and "power moves" together.

LOL

Posted by: Formerly Virginian at September 08, 2026 04:54 PM (N1tpc)

141 My inner Hatemonger is coming out... "Boobies...are evil! We musn't look at boobies!".

Did you see Space King 5? Hatemonger was already my favorite character but in that episode...wow.

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:54 PM (sKqQm)

142 59 And yes, as an Electronics guy? E= I R.. used a bunch.
Posted by: Romeo13 at September 08, 2026 04:40 PM (mP0Kj)

Is that you, Ohm?

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at September 08, 2026 04:42 PM (gkBVP)

ELI the ICEman!!!

Posted by: Tex Lovera at September 08, 2026 04:54 PM (wtvvX)

143 LOL, I purposefully chose a major (advertising) that would not require that I take calculus, algebra, trig, etc. Unfortunately, it did require statistics which I had to take twice.
Posted by: hobbitopoly

The joke was on me. Unfortunately even history majors were required to do two quarters of math when I went to college.

Posted by: Tuna at September 08, 2026 04:54 PM (lJ0H4)

144 This doesn't add up.

Posted by: Ted Torgerson at September 08, 2026 04:54 PM (wGerL)

145 This guy seems to believe some weird stuff.

Posted by: Zombie Art Bell at September 08, 2026 04:55 PM (do6//)

146 Just two hateful retards chattering away. I've seen deeper intellects on The View. Okay, I have heard tell of them.

Posted by: AMartel at September 08, 2026 04:55 PM (EyAQh)

147
He has Swanson F-you money. He don't care.

Posted by: m
---

He's suing the Swanson family for his cut.
Swanson says he's not blood, he's and ad-on
never was part of the, nuts and bolts family,
and gets no cut.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 04:55 PM (AJWch)

148 Here's a contrived but somewhat realistic use for algebra that even Tucker could understand.

Say you're a shop owner who sells fruit. You have a cart you take to a nearby town to pick up your fruit.

Based on past experience, you know your cart can hold 500 bananas and 30 watermelons.
Also based on past experience, you know your cart can hold 300 bananas and 40 watermelons.

You find a pretty good deal on bananas and watermelons this time.

You want to buy 400 bananas and as many watermelons as you can.

Without breaking your cart, and without wasting your money by buying too few watermelons to fill your cart or so many you break your cart or are force to abandon some, how many can you buy?

Posted by: bonhomme at September 08, 2026 04:55 PM (mkw2N)

149 123 I have no idea what 'goy' means. I keep seeing it being used against Jews by the usual suspects of loons.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come

The term basically means non-Jews (gentiles). I think there's an implication of some level of subservience, intentional or not.
Posted by: Brother Tim is tired

Oh. That's lame. Whatever. the Bible Study I go to on Tuesday nights kicks off again tonight. They break over the summer. We're studying Numbers tonight. I've never studied it. Read it but never studied. Hope Algebra isn't involved.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at September 08, 2026 04:55 PM (sAmhv)

150 You can't appreciate properly young B-cup or larger ladies walking or jogging free without partial-differential equations.
>>>
The algorithm gave me a video of a young woman who shuffle dances and pretty clearly isn't wearing a bra. Her top parts move more and faster then her legs...
Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:49 PM (sKqQm)

The Hang On Sloopy dancing girl?

Posted by: Count de Monet at September 08, 2026 04:55 PM (wVcYX)

151 126 Tucker is rather derivative.
Posted by: Tex Lovera at September 08, 2026 04:51 PM (wtvvX)

The truth will out.

It appears ol' Tuck has been and continues to be something of a twat, isn't he?

Posted by: tcn in AK at September 08, 2026 04:55 PM (H9BGx)

152 Goy - i think for orthodox, they can't do any work on sabbath, they need someone who can - simple things, take out the garbage, flush the toilet, stuff like that. At least that's what some guy who lived in NYC an age ago said he got paid to do for a local orthodox family. He was the goy.

Posted by: Hey Now

"Shabbat Goyim", literally "sabbath goy" or basically the dude they pay to do what they aren't allowed to Friday night/Saturday daylight. Not sure how common it is any longer.

Posted by: Brother Tim is tired at September 08, 2026 04:55 PM (OUMaO)

153 What an idiot. They created differential equations to f’k with people. Algebra is for children.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at September 08, 2026 04:56 PM (4aa1M)

154 Tuqur saw how many views Candy Owens got with insane Jewish conspiracies and saw an opportunity. As with all things follow the money. I really doubt he believes 10% of the shit he spews. But he knows his viewers do.

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:56 PM (U1NLK)

155 I am really good at math that is concrete and relatable in my head. Algebra and Trig 100% click for me. College Calculus whipped my ass and I was never able to understand it even with tutoring and living with Engineering majors.

Posted by: ballistic at September 08, 2026 04:56 PM (oqH4h)

156 He's suing the Swanson family for his cut.
Swanson says he's not blood, he's and ad-on
never was part of the, nuts and bolts family,
and gets no cut.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 04:55 PM (AJWch)

Also, he's an asshole.

Posted by: tcn in AK at September 08, 2026 04:56 PM (H9BGx)

157 I used to play a game called Crossmath that was kind of like a crossword puzzle but with numbers. It was challenging and fun (and was a lot of logic and algebra on the fly). But the programs all started to put in ads and interruptions and annoyances, so I deleted them.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 04:57 PM (K32Fz)

158 Did you see Space King 5? Hatemonger was already my favorite character but in that episode...wow.

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:54 PM (sKqQm)

Hehehe, yes, I did! His battle prayer during the end fight, ooh...

"With their many eyes, THEY SHALL WEEP.
With their many limbs, THEY WILL CRAWL.
In their many tongues, THEY SHALL PLEAD.
In their many forms, THEY WILL FALL.
SO SAYETH SPACE KING!"

Posted by: Thrawn at September 08, 2026 04:57 PM (oPFtC)

159 The only thing I am remembering about differential equations is synthetic division. I don't remember what those words mean, I just remember the words.

Posted by: Oglebay at September 08, 2026 04:57 PM (2ap+5)

160 The Hang On Sloopy dancing girl?

I'm going to have to get a link to tell

For science. Great bouncy science

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 04:58 PM (sKqQm)

161 The algebra, I do not speak it.

Posted by: Eromero at September 08, 2026 04:58 PM (LHPAg)

162
Its like Haole or Gaijin or Gwailo, etc. Its "not one of us" in a semi-pejorative sense. The thing is, I see non-Jews using it a lot more than Jews.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 04:50 PM (K32Fz)

Haole and Gaijin are generally "foreign person we don't like", but Gwailo is more "foreign non-human cockroach who we have a duty to cheat before crushing their bodies under our sandals".

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 08, 2026 04:58 PM (y9nCu)

163 >>>
Without breaking your cart, and without wasting your money by buying too few watermelons to fill your cart or so many you break your cart or are force to abandon some, how many can you buy?

Posted by: bonhomme
---

That's some kinda puzzle idn't it?

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 04:59 PM (AJWch)

164 How are we to factor apples and oranges without algebra?

Posted by: Kittens! at September 08, 2026 04:59 PM (jrgJz)

165 Am I supposed to know who Jeff Elofson is?

Posted by: nooneyouknowyouknow at September 08, 2026 04:59 PM (Iwv3U)

166 "If you need to change the number of people you make a recipe for, you are using algebra. If you want to know how many six packs you need at the game party with the bros, same." Posted by: Oldcat

I was thinking "algebra" is more about
x^2 + 8xy + 3y^2= 100 ... solved for x and y
or there is probably another equation needed ... heh.

But solving for six packs is just
10 people X 6 beers/person = 60 beers. common math?

Posted by: illiniwek at September 08, 2026 04:59 PM (vbXSk)

167 It's an anti semitic slur.
Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at September 08, 2026 04:51 PM (I43vL)

It is used to describe a non-Jewish person. Usually in a negative connotation.

Posted by: A Gentile at September 08, 2026 05:00 PM (Z8Kuq)

168
Hehehe, yes, I did! His battle prayer during the end fight, ooh...

Yep. His squad mostly annoys me - the leader is a retard. The guy with the cybernetic eye is a slightly more amusing retard. Chestnut is kind of annoying.

But Hatemonger? He is the perfect Warhammer parody and makes everything work.

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 05:00 PM (sKqQm)

169 Integration by parts…. Now there’s something that’ll blow your mind. Or how about infinite series….

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at September 08, 2026 05:01 PM (gkBVP)

170 Haole and Gaijin are generally "foreign person we don't like", but Gwailo is more "foreign non-human cockroach who we have a duty to cheat before crushing their bodies under our sandals".

The Chinese still struggle with, despite all evidence to the contrary, thinking they are the greatest people on earth. Like most of the Native American tribes in the US who thought they were just "the people" and everyone else was not people.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:01 PM (K32Fz)

171
We were drinking, so it was funny.
Posted by: Orson

===============

Lol, that does sound funny.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at September 08, 2026 05:01 PM (XJ22o)

172 Magnets, how do they work?

Posted by: PG at September 08, 2026 05:01 PM (X+9ka)

173 former carpenter; 3 4 5 rule-down 9", over 12"' angle tape measure should be 15". 90 degrees.

Posted by: pahound at September 08, 2026 05:01 PM (AjR4+)

174 102 I have no idea what 'goy' means. I keep seeing it being used against Jews by the usual suspects of loons.
Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at September 08, 2026 04:48 PM (sAmhv)

goy
noun (plural goyim) or (plural goys)
sometimes derogatory
a term used by Jewish people for a non-Jewish person.

origin
early 19th century: from Hebrew gōy 'people, nation'

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 05:01 PM (odBC9)

175 10 people X 6 beers/person = 60 beers. common math?

There are six beers in a pack. Each of your friends will drink six beers. You have ten friends. How many packs do you need?

This is algebra, although because your friends are drunks, very simple algebra.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at September 08, 2026 05:02 PM (VJ1er)

176 Daily Mail has an exclusive - an interview with the 3 AWFL jurors in the Clancy case, including the forewoman. They look and speak exactly like you'd expect:

https://tinyurl.com/zj42rab2

Posted by: beckster at September 08, 2026 05:02 PM (kX27y)

177 It's Calculus that basically never has any real world application outside of engineering yet is widely required as a math course.

Algebra though is used all the time.

Posted by: Leupold at September 08, 2026 05:02 PM (eIzlH)

178 Weasel will so disappointed in y’all. He does a fairly advanced math class several times a year and all y’all seem to get some of what he says.

Posted by: nurse ratched at September 08, 2026 05:02 PM (W2Pud)

179 102 I have no idea what 'goy' means. I keep seeing it being used against Jews by the usual suspects of loons.
Posted by: Puddleglum

"Goy" (plural "goyim") was the words used in Yiddish-speaking communities from the Middle Ages up[ through the 19th century to refer to anyone who wasn't Jewish. It wasn't originally derogatory, just a descriptive term to distinguish locals from outsiders. Every ethnicity and langauage groups has some kind of similar term. A good example of a similar terms was how Native Americans would refer to any outsider as "paleface."

But once the word "goy" arrived (along witht he rest of Yiddish) into an urban environment (specifically 19th century New York), and non-Jews heard it for the first time, they kind of took offense, feeling the term was exclusionary and demeaning. (Exactly how whites took offense at the originally non-derogatory term "paleface.")

Eventually, the word was burdened with negative connotations, such that anytime a Yiddish-speaker used it, it was deemed insulting.

Fast forward to the post-10/7 world, and now it is an adjective which means, "Inferior cultural artifacts devised by sneaky Jews to waste non-Jew's time."

Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2026 05:02 PM (Av6i5)

180 "They discuss how they've never met anyone in their life who uses algebra, which is "fake math" for people "in the matrix."

Sure, sure. Hey, do you guys like to play cards? Y'ever play for money? It's a lot of fun.

Posted by: Bilwis - Wizard of Clwyd at September 08, 2026 05:03 PM (r7+Q7)

181 2 + 2 = 5

Posted by: Cucker Tarlson at September 08, 2026 05:03 PM (deNAM)

182 If I were that man, I think I would have gotten violent with the 'ladies.'
---------------------
Speaking with NBC10 Boston, the three women detailed the arguments they had with the one male juror who would not acquit.

One of the women, known only as juror two, told the outlet: 'He, I think got up to the cart [with the exhibits] once and then went back to his seat.

'He would not interact with us and try to understand. We read to him the definition of reasonable doubt.

'He said one day "why don't we have the judge read it again?", and we were like no we have it in front of us.'

One woman, the jury's foreperson, told the outlet: 'He had reasonable doubt. He admitted he had reasonable doubt.

'I started filling out the forms, I was so excited. There were three forms I had to fill out, and then he said "but I'm still not going to say she's not guilty."'

According to the trio, they argued so much with the man that the alternate jurors could hear them through a wall.

Posted by: beckster at September 08, 2026 05:03 PM (kX27y)

183 Well, the algebraic geometrist Alexander Grothendieck had an anarchist, Hasidic Jewish father and a Protestant German mother, but in the end, he ended up choosing to live in seclusion eating dandelion soup, but according to Tuq'r, he's just the sort to inflict Jewish math upon the world.

As for Abel and Galois, I don't know of any Jewish connection. What about the other algebraicists?

Posted by: Sasquatch, the Original Trans-Wookie at September 08, 2026 05:04 PM (zSq3q)

184 Tuqur saw how many views Candy Owens got with insane Jewish conspiracies and saw an opportunity. As with all things follow the money. I really doubt he believes 10% of the shit he spews. But he knows his viewers do.
Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 04:56 PM (U1NLK)

Not sure if the order of these events was accurate. Tucker has been veering off course for a while now.

Posted by: Oldcat at September 08, 2026 05:04 PM (uhVAy)

185 Tucker Carlson: Algebra Is a Jewish Plot to Confuse the Goys by Sticking Letters Into Math

wait wait wait

I thought AoSHQ was supposed to be a No Math Zone.

Posted by: Darrell Harris at September 08, 2026 05:04 PM (0CU3H)

186 Am I supposed to know who Jeff Elofson is?

I know its "cool" and "edgy" to say WHO? About people who pop up in the news but... increasingly I have no idea who these people are. Like Jelly Roll I think it was in the news last week? Never heard of him before this came up. No idea who these people are.

Gossip is like "Poppy Torque and Aleena Corkscrew went to the Nebbta last week and got engaged!"

What the hell are you even talking about?

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:04 PM (K32Fz)

187 "It's Calculus that basically never has any real world application outside of engineering"

It's in every car driver's dashboard. Odometer for integration, speedometer for differentiation.

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 05:04 PM (Jr5Lq)

188 Does Barbra wish she was goy?
Is George really a boy?
Is filthy ever divine?
It's all subjective

Posted by: Billy and the Boingers at September 08, 2026 05:05 PM (X+NGn)

189 You use algebra all the time- you just do not realize it.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at September 08, 2026 05:06 PM (zZu0s)

190 It's Calculus that basically never has any real world application outside of engineering yet is widely required as a math course.

Algebra though is used all the time.
Posted by: Leupold at September 08, 2026 05:02 PM (eIzlH)

Area of material under a curve has lots of applications.

Posted by: Oldcat at September 08, 2026 05:06 PM (uhVAy)

191 The Five - the DSA are meeting in Chicago to plot takeover.
First you get the power, then you get the women

CNN - Tapper Supreme Court and mail-in ballots

MSNow - more Americans are identifying as Dems! Including the dead, those that don't exist and those who exist in multiple voting areas at the same time.

CBC - Canada strikes back. Good luck with that.

Posted by: Stateless - keeping 15 year Ralphy happy and alive. Puppy at heart at September 08, 2026 05:06 PM (Sco7b)

192 "Germany did the most infamous own-goal by kicking out all their top scientists prior to World War II.
England was most accommodating and encouraged them to emigrate there. Would they do the same thing today, is a question."

England now has imported the top Muslim pedophiles, who have taught the England elite the best methods for grooming and raping young girls. Not quite as useful as the top scientists, but fun for the elites (for now).

Posted by: illiniwek at September 08, 2026 05:07 PM (vbXSk)

193 'I started filling out the forms, I was so excited. There were three forms I had to fill out, and then he said "but I'm still not going to say she's not guilty."'

EXCITED to find her not guilty?!?

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 05:07 PM (sKqQm)

194 I forgot about the wrestling demons thing. Is it a nightly occurrence?

Posted by: Classy Freddie Blassie at September 08, 2026 05:07 PM (Fn+3X)

195 'He would not interact with us and try to understand.

Meaning: he kept using logic and facts instead of feeling the way we wanted him to

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:07 PM (K32Fz)

196 Like most of the Native American tribes in the US who thought they were just "the people" and everyone else was not people.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:01 PM (K32Fz)

Still does mean that. Mary Peltola runs a campaign ad with an old Yupik grandma saying that Mary will serve The People. Meaning, Natives.

Posted by: tcn in AK at September 08, 2026 05:07 PM (H9BGx)

197 Do you really have to "really know math" to make a kiln?

Posted by: 29Victor at September 08, 2026 05:08 PM (0MjtC)

198 148
He has Swanson F-you money. He don't care.

Posted by: m
---

He's suing the Swanson family for his cut.
Swanson says he's not blood, he's and ad-on
never was part of the, nuts and bolts family,
and gets no cut.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 04:55 PM (AJWch)

Huh! Maybe this is why he's gotten all twisted.

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 05:08 PM (odBC9)

199 Calculus that basically never has any real world application outside of engineering yet is widely required as a math course.

—

Finance is all calculus.

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at September 08, 2026 05:08 PM (U1NLK)

200 Don't mess with my Saturday side gig.

Posted by: Shabbos Goy at September 08, 2026 05:08 PM (Fn+3X)

201 "Do you really have to "really know math" to make a kiln?"

If you don't, you might end up with an irrational kiln.

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 05:08 PM (Jr5Lq)

202 Area of material under a curve has lots of applications.
Posted by: Oldcat at September 08, 2026 05:06 PM (uhVAy)

Can't do Civil Engineering without it.

Posted by: tcn in AK at September 08, 2026 05:09 PM (H9BGx)

203 I forgot about the wrestling demons thing. Is it a nightly occurrence?

Just the once that I know of. To me it sounds like his dog tried to get on the bed and Tucker freaked out because he was half awake. LOOK SCRATCHES!

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:09 PM (K32Fz)

204 198 Do you really have to "really know math" to make a kiln?
Posted by: 29Victor at September 08, 2026 05:08 PM (0MjtC)

Well, let's see, pottery has been around for about 10,000 years, most of that kiln fired....

Posted by: tcn in AK at September 08, 2026 05:10 PM (H9BGx)

205 EXCITED to find her not guilty?!?
Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 05:07 PM (sKqQm)

Sick.

Posted by: beckster at September 08, 2026 05:10 PM (kX27y)

206 I wrestled all night myself.

Posted by: Jacob at September 08, 2026 05:11 PM (Fn+3X)

207 So, I guess the Jews would have to follow a modified Grothendieck strategy to control the world, Tuq'r fashion. First, master algebra like Grothendieck did. Then produce work in the field in such a stunning manner that mathematicians speak reverently of you. Then go into seclusion where you live eating only dandelion soup. After this, somehow conquer the world.

It can be done, apparently. Just don't ask me how the last step is done.

Posted by: Sasquatch, the Original Trans-Wookie at September 08, 2026 05:11 PM (zSq3q)

208 204 I forgot about the wrestling demons thing. Is it a nightly occurrence?

Just the once that I know of. To me it sounds like his dog tried to get on the bed and Tucker freaked out because he was half awake. LOOK SCRATCHES!
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:09 PM (K32Fz)

I suspect the demons have already bagged him and can't be bothered any more.

Posted by: tcn in AK at September 08, 2026 05:11 PM (H9BGx)

209 The square root of a negative number is called an "imaginary number," represented by the letter "i."

Starting today, the square root of "i" is dubbed "a carlson," and is represented by a doo-doo emoji.

Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2026 05:11 PM (Av6i5)

210 198 Do you really have to "really know math" to make a kiln?
Posted by: 29Victor at September 08, 2026 05:08 PM (0MjtC)

Well, let's see, pottery has been around for about 10,000 years, most of that kiln fired....
Posted by: tcn in AK at September 08, 2026 05:10 PM (H9BGx)

Well if you don't get enough bricks to cover the roof, its gonna use a lot of wood.

Posted by: Oldcat at September 08, 2026 05:11 PM (uhVAy)

211 EXCITED to find her not guilty?!?

The most positive spin would be "excited to finally get this over with and go home" but I suspect they were gleeful about making sure she didn't go to jail.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:11 PM (K32Fz)

212 How soon before Tucker goes over the Protocols of Zion and screams and hollers that it is a blueprint for world Jewish domination?

Posted by: Zombie Henry Ford at September 08, 2026 05:11 PM (Z8Kuq)

213 1. Become popular rightwing commentator
2. Build up a bunch of organic energy behind you by talking about real issues.
3. Pivot
4. Blame the Jews for everything you've previously mentioned.
5. Hate Da Joos so much that you start simping for Islam (and taking money from Qatar).
6. You now talk about working with the Left, even if that means throwing your old base under the bus.
7. Promote a bunch of increasingly retarded conspiracy theories.
Congratulations, all the energy you harnessed has been successfully neutralized, demoralizing your former audience.

Posted by: The Tucker Carlson Method at September 08, 2026 05:13 PM (deNAM)

214 "The square root of a negative number is called an "imaginary number," represented by the letter "i." "

EEs use 'j', because they can.

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 05:13 PM (Jr5Lq)

215 How soon before Tucker goes over the Protocols of Zion and screams and hollers that it is a blueprint for world Jewish domination?
Posted by: Zombie Henry Ford at September 08, 2026 05:11 PM (Z8Kuq)

You'd think they'd come up with a new forgery by now, that one's a bit old.

Posted by: Oldcat at September 08, 2026 05:13 PM (uhVAy)

216 I wrestled all night myself.

Muslims have recently read that tale and are gleefully crowing about how weak Yahweh must be, because Jacob beat him in a wrestling match.

You can always tell who has had kids and who has not. Like God asking "where are you?" to Adam and Eve. Its not about ignorance, its about giving the kids a chance to do the right thing before you take the belt off.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:13 PM (K32Fz)

217 These days, the word 'celebrity' means less and less.

Posted by: Stateless - keeping 15 year Ralphy happy and alive. Puppy at heart at September 08, 2026 05:13 PM (Sco7b)

218 " You have 2000 Jewish people. If 1400 of them control the world banking system, how many are left to control the weather?"

- Tucker math

Posted by: Cheerful Reprobate at September 08, 2026 05:13 PM (IwlG/)

219 You are trying to estimate the area under a curve so you divide the area up into rectangles. To check the quality of the measurement, you do your calculations again with somewhat smaller rectangles. Then you check that one. Before long, you are doing calculus.

Posted by: Oglebay at September 08, 2026 05:14 PM (2ap+5)

220 'i' is actually sqrt(-1). To get an imaginary number generally, use a+bi.

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 05:14 PM (Jr5Lq)

221 Do you really have to "really know math" to make a kiln?
Posted by: 29Victor at September 08, 2026 05:08 PM (0MjtC)

It might have helped in safely using one.

Posted by: Zombie Fawn Leibowitz at September 08, 2026 05:14 PM (wVcYX)

222 Gossip is like "Poppy Torque and Aleena Corkscrew went to the Nebbta last week and got engaged!"

What the hell are you even talking about?
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:04 PM (K32Fz)

News Desks are now run by the advertising department.

So it is all about visibility of who they wish to promote.

Posted by: Romeo13 at September 08, 2026 05:14 PM (mP0Kj)

223 Or precisely, a complex number, I guess.

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 05:14 PM (Jr5Lq)

224
Art Garfunkel considering leaving US over Trump.

Bye asshole!

Posted by: four seasons at September 08, 2026 05:14 PM (/QHx4)

225 length x width = Area
interest = principal x rate x time
pay = hours worked x hourly rate

Most people have used at least one of these equations in a practical way at some point in their life.

Posted by: TheITGuy2 at September 08, 2026 05:15 PM (v9ncW)

226 I sort of understood why I needed algebra for nursing. Not really, but I had to take it.

I remain in the dark why I needed physics. And at some point, for reasons unknown, I took and passed and hated zoology. I also took geology and don't remember why and liked it. I like rocks, fossils and stuff I find on beaches.

I had a lot of ology classes. Biology, anatomy and physiology obviously made sense with chemistry and organic chemistry for nursing.

The classes I hated the most were psych and I had at least 3 of those horrors.

I may use algebra and trig without knowing it but I consciously avoid them. Got into trig and made an A. It might have been from a concussion from basketball.

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at September 08, 2026 05:15 PM (hzuYO)

227 I used to wrestle in my sleep too.

Posted by: Iron Mike Sharpe at September 08, 2026 05:15 PM (Fn+3X)

228 Finance is all calculus.
Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez

===

Not really, just unique esoteric parts.

Maybe for a quant fund

Posted by: Leupold at September 08, 2026 05:15 PM (eIzlH)

229 The Natives living along the Yukon used to say there were three kinds of white men: White Men, Black White Men, and Swedes.

Make of it what you will.

Posted by: tcn in AK at September 08, 2026 05:15 PM (H9BGx)

230 a squared + b squared = c squared
that is useful math when squaring a foundation.

A pedant might explicate that this is geometry, not algebra.
But you really need to know that hillbillies call this
"Three-four-fivin' it." And I have watched it done in the field.

Le Bourgeois gentilhomme was surprised to find
that he had been speaking prose.

Posted by: Way, Way Downriver at September 08, 2026 05:15 PM (zdLoL)

231
Oh yeah? Tell me who 'we' scarred.

--------------
Scott Jennings
@ScottJenningsKY
·
5h
you just knew this was coming at some point.
Quote

Bobby LaValley
@Bobby_LaVallley
·
6h
🚨 Abdul El-Sayed in unearthed audio:

"9/11 scarred our country in profound ways, but what we did after 9/11 scarred millions of other people."

Posted by: beckster at September 08, 2026 05:15 PM (kX27y)

232 'i' is actually sqrt(-1)

My calculator says ERROR when I try that, not I

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:16 PM (K32Fz)

233 198 Do you really have to "really know math" to make a kiln?
Posted by: 29Victor at September 08, 2026 05:08 PM (0MjtC)

For the love of God, YES!

Posted by: Fawn Liebowitz at September 08, 2026 05:16 PM (r7+Q7)

234 219 " You have 2000 Jewish people. If 1400 of them control the world banking system, how many are left to control the weather?"

- Tucker math
Posted by: Cheerful Reprobate at September 08, 2026 05:13 PM (IwlG/)

Ha!

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 05:16 PM (odBC9)

235 EEs use 'j', because they can.

“An ingenious writer has discovered, in the name of Thomas Jefferson, the Anagram ‘Host of man is free.’”—The Missouri Republican, November 16, 1826

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at September 08, 2026 05:16 PM (VJ1er)

236 If Tucker x 5 = 10, what does Tucker equal?

Jello

Posted by: Elric the Blade at September 08, 2026 05:16 PM (v/qpK)

237 233 Your calculator has no imagination.

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 05:17 PM (Jr5Lq)

238 Either Tucker has gone insane, or this is a cry for help.

Posted by: Al in St. Louis at September 08, 2026 05:17 PM (pKne7)

239 2 + 2 = 5

For sufficiently large values of 2.
-- old physics joke

Posted by: Oddbob at September 08, 2026 05:17 PM (vTZFs)

240 Variables, Tuck. They're called variables.
Conversations with innumerate people are pointless.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at September 08, 2026 05:17 PM (2Ez/1)

241
College Calculus whipped my ass and I was never able to understand it even with tutoring and living with Engineering majors.
Posted by: ballistic at September 08, 2026 04:56 PM (oqH4h)

I knew an Afghan guy in college who drank beer like he lived in Green Bay, was the grandson of a rather famous Indian mohammedan lawyer who did a Koran translation that was the official Saudi translation to English for many years, and he used to do calculus for fun with a couple of other engineering students at beer parties.

Shit. I had problems with Introductory Algebra.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 08, 2026 05:17 PM (y9nCu)

242 212 EXCITED to find her not guilty?!?

The most positive spin would be "excited to finally get this over with and go home" but I suspect they were gleeful about making sure she didn't go to jail.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:11 PM (K32Fz)

16 There are six things the Lord hates,
seven that are detestable to him:
17 haughty eyes,
a lying tongue,
hands that shed innocent blood,
18 a heart that devises wicked schemes,
feet that are quick to rush into evil,
19 a false witness who pours out lies
and a person who stirs up conflict in the community.

Wow... batting 1000...

Posted by: Romeo13 at September 08, 2026 05:17 PM (mP0Kj)

243 The Natives living along the Yukon used to say there were three kinds of white men: White Men, Black White Men, and Swedes.

Even they understood the untrustworthy nature of the snowbillies

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:17 PM (K32Fz)

244 We're Jews out in space
We're zooming along protecting the Hebrew race
We're Jews out in space
If trouble appears we put it right back in its place

When goyim attack us
We give 'em a smack
We'll slap them right back in the face

We're Jews out in space
We're zooming along protecting the Hebrew race

Posted by: Mel Brooks at September 08, 2026 05:18 PM (wVcYX)

245 110 …but there are reasons to study it anyway.

Also, a lot of them, you don’t need to know them, just that they exist. When you need them, you can look them up, or realize that it’s worthwhile to call a friend who might remember how to do them.

And so that you don’t think it’s joo magic when someone else does use it.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at September 08, 2026 04:49 PM (VJ1er)

Yes. Like most general undergraduate courses.

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 05:18 PM (odBC9)

246 My calculator says ERROR when I try that, not I"

Mine says 8008...

Posted by: man at September 08, 2026 05:18 PM (XuXeR)

247 It works....

Posted by: pahound at September 08, 2026 05:18 PM (AjR4+)

248 When trying to determine the height of something you're standing a known distance away from, knowledge of trigonometry is central, not merely tangent, to the solution.
-----

I could solve that with geometry. Why would I need trigonometry?

Posted by: Crusader at September 08, 2026 05:18 PM (TN0g+)

249 i^2 = -1

This little critter can be used to solve electrical circuit problems with capacitors and inductors… good stuff

Not to mention Euler’s sublime e^i*pi + 1 = 0

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at September 08, 2026 05:18 PM (gkBVP)

250 You can bet your sweet ass Tucker uses algebra all the time.

$37 million from a Soros cutout divided by 20 podcasts = X dollars per podcast.

X dollars per podcast - Y production costs - Z for staff salary = P dollars per podcast for me.

Posted by: Gref at September 08, 2026 05:19 PM (5rh/l)

251 240 2 + 2 = 5

For sufficiently large values of 2.
-- old physics joke
Posted by: Oddbob at September 08, 2026 05:17 PM (vTZFs)

; )

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 05:19 PM (odBC9)

252 Art Garfunkel considering leaving US over Trump.

Bye asshole!

Art Garfunkel is still alive? Huh. (And I'm a big fan of the earlier S&G stuff.)

Posted by: Oddbob at September 08, 2026 05:19 PM (vTZFs)

253 Tcn, from what can we glean from these arbitrary distinctions? Were the Swedes considered especially scrofulous or something?

Posted by: Common Tater at September 08, 2026 05:20 PM (+/Ezd)

254 Honey, I'm Ohm!

Posted by: Draft resistor at September 08, 2026 05:20 PM (Cqx++)

255 "9/11 scarred our country in profound ways, but what we did after 9/11 scarred millions of other people."
Posted by: beckster at September 08, 2026 05:15 PM (kX27y)

If it wasn't Billions I want my money back. Pour encourager les autres.

Posted by: Bilwis - Wizard of Clwyd at September 08, 2026 05:20 PM (r7+Q7)

256 Mine says 8008

You need a better calculator, the advanced one says 5318008

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:20 PM (K32Fz)

257 Simon and Garfunkle was maybe sorta kinda OK, but listening to it had the disconcerting effect of causing one's testicles to retract into the abdomen. Usually cured by frequent applications of Canned Heat, Deep Purple, or Led Zeppelin.

Posted by: Common Tater at September 08, 2026 05:21 PM (+/Ezd)

258 255 Honey, I'm Ohm!
Posted by: Draft resistor

Ouch, that pun hertz.

Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2026 05:21 PM (Av6i5)

259 253 Art Garfunkel considering leaving US over Trump.

Bye asshole!

Art Garfunkel is still alive? Huh. (And I'm a big fan of the earlier S&G stuff.)
Posted by: Oddbob at September 08, 2026 05:19 PM (vTZFs)

In the immortal words of that great Thespian, Businessman, and 2nd Amendment Advocate... Curly Bill Brocius...

Well.... Bye...

Posted by: Romeo13 at September 08, 2026 05:22 PM (mP0Kj)

260 I could solve that with geometry. Why would I need trigonometry?

"How else could you plot a course from The Lizard to Jamaica?"
--Captain Aubrey

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:22 PM (K32Fz)

261 180: Thanks zombie! You're pretty knowledgeable for the undead!

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at September 08, 2026 05:22 PM (sAmhv)

262
Tcn, from what can we glean from these arbitrary distinctions? Were the Swedes considered especially scrofulous or something?
Posted by: Common Tater at September 08, 2026 05:20 PM (+/Ezd)

Teh Horde has long been the Cassandra of the intertubes sounding the alarm over the Vast Scandi Lutefisk Conspiracy

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 08, 2026 05:22 PM (y9nCu)

263 Tcn, from what can we glean from these arbitrary distinctions? Were the Swedes considered especially scrofulous or something?

Just a comment on the filthy icebacks

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:22 PM (K32Fz)

264 Artie is probably getting a bit long in the tooth anyway. He's just putting out his virtue signaling virtues, to signal.

Eat a dick, buddy.

Posted by: Common Tater at September 08, 2026 05:23 PM (+/Ezd)

265 256 "9/11 scarred our country in profound ways, but what we did after 9/11 scarred millions of other people."
Posted by: beckster at September 08, 2026 05:15 PM (kX27y)

If it wasn't Billions I want my money back. Pour encourager les autres.
Posted by: Bilwis - Wizard of Clwyd at September 08, 2026 05:20 PM (r7+Q7)

Yup... why the hell do we pay for all this Military if those who ATTACK US are not scared?

Posted by: Romeo13 at September 08, 2026 05:23 PM (mP0Kj)

266 From Deadline.

Our societal betters felating each other.

French filmmaker Florian Zeller has returned with a new feature, Bunker, starring Penélope Cruz and Javier Bardem, which earned a 16-minute ovation this evening after its debut screening at the Venice Film Festival.

There was a very enthusiastic response to the movie in the room, with Cruz and Bardem sharing hugs during the applause and woos from the crowd. The 16-minute 30 second ovation takes it beyond the 14-minute ovation scored by Wild Horse Nine earlier in the festival and makes it one of the longest ever at the Venice Film Festival.

Posted by: Stateless - keeping 15 year Ralphy happy and alive. Puppy at heart at September 08, 2026 05:23 PM (Sco7b)

267 I was dismayed to learn that our rock bottom public school district has 'geometry' classes that don't require proofs. WTF?

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 05:24 PM (Jr5Lq)

268 Posted by: Archimedes at September 08, 2026 04:36 PM (Riz8t)

Use a url shortening app for links, or dont use links.

Is this too complicated for you?

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at September 08, 2026 05:24 PM (k5CNB)

269 Want your mind blown? Look up the square root of i

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at September 08, 2026 05:24 PM (gkBVP)

270 The Jew enslaves with his math!

Posted by: Joseph Goyballs at September 08, 2026 05:24 PM (jJhtM)

271 240 2 + 2 = 5

For sufficiently large values of 2.
-- old physics joke
Posted by: Oddbob at September 08, 2026 05:17 PM (vTZFs)

Here I am!

Posted by: Abigail Shapiro, probably at September 08, 2026 05:24 PM (wVcYX)

272 > Do you really have to "really know math" to make a kiln?

No. But you're going to need a lot of trial and error. Or access to the result of other people's trial and error. You're also likely to have an overbuilt or underbuilt system and you won't know its limits without a more trial and error.

Posted by: bonhomme at September 08, 2026 05:24 PM (mkw2N)

273 262 180: Thanks zombie! You're pretty knowledgeable for the undead!
Posted by: Puddleglum

Since time has no meaning for me, I have lots of it to study every topic ever imagined.

Posted by: zombie at September 08, 2026 05:25 PM (Av6i5)

274 The actor Terrence Howard thought that any number multiplied by zero producing zero made no sense because it made something disappear. Representing something be hard

Posted by: Smell the Glove at September 08, 2026 05:25 PM (v6vok)

275 But you're going to need a lot of trial and error.

yeah you can do all the stuff math does without it, you'll just take 29 times as long

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:25 PM (K32Fz)

276 When trying to determine the height of something you're standing a known distance away from, knowledge of trigonometry is central, not merely tangent, to the solution.
-----

I could solve that with geometry. Why would I need trigonometry?
Posted by: Crusader at September 08, 2026 05:18 PM (TN0g+)
——

You’d both be using the same equations, which straddle the line between geo and trig. You’d be calculating the height as the unknown leg of a geometric triangle with 90 degrees at the base, the known distance of another leg, and the angle of the incline of the last leg that goes straight to the top of the height object.

Posted by: Elric the Blade at September 08, 2026 05:26 PM (v/qpK)

277 Proofless Geometry
Week 1: How does this triangle make you feel?
Week 2: Is it fair that squares have 4 corners, but triangles only 3?
Week 3: How would you call out a racist quadrilateral?

Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 05:26 PM (Jr5Lq)

278 225
Art Garfunkel considering leaving US over Trump.

Bye asshole!

Posted by: four seasons

Bottom story of the day. Also, must have some new music he wants to promote so he's got to say something to remind people he's not dead.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at September 08, 2026 05:26 PM (sAmhv)

279
4+A*(Good Time) = 8675309

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 08, 2026 05:26 PM (y9nCu)

280 According to the trio, they argued so much with the man that the alternate jurors could hear them through a wall.
Posted by: beckster at September 08, 2026 05:03 PM (kX27y)
*******
That poor man is a hero to me.

I simply want her locked up with her tubes tied to never, ever be near a child again.

Unsure if prison would give her care as the nut house does. The fact that she picks and chooses what she eats shows a thought process. Is she paranoid or the food is not good enough? Apparently very little hygiene til they haul her off to the shower room. I guess she sits in her misery.

I don't want her out of the life she made for herself. She deserves nothing but having to be trapped in her own misery til her last breath.

I don't understand the mercy towards her when she showed none for her own children.

If she was that psycho her little self admission to a psych unit would have become her home for awhile. She manipulated them as well, I am positive of this,to be discharged after 5dys.

I hope there is not a trial but keeping her locked up for life. I am tired of seeing photos of her scowling profile as she creeps me out. So does her attorney...she picked someone just like her.

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at September 08, 2026 05:27 PM (hzuYO)

281
The Engineer Guy
Building a Cathedral without Science or Mathematics: The Engineering Method Explained

https://youtu.be/_ivqWN4L3zU

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at September 08, 2026 05:27 PM (2Ez/1)

282 Now on Tucker... If we can fart from our ass then why can't we breathe through it? Why do Jews insist we have lungs? I don't know. I have never seen a lung, have you? My next guest will prove we have been lied to by talking out of his ass.

Posted by: Thatch at September 08, 2026 05:27 PM (S6YCM)

283 Week 3: How would you call out a racist quadrilateral?
Posted by: gp at September 08, 2026 05:26 PM (Jr5Lq)

Simple... call it a square!

Posted by: Romeo13 at September 08, 2026 05:27 PM (mP0Kj)

284 advanced one says 5318008"

That's ok, I guess. 71077345 anyone?

Posted by: man at September 08, 2026 05:27 PM (XuXeR)

285 Just when you think he can't say anything more idiotic, he scores a mother load of imbecility. Congratulations, T'Qur

Posted by: Chicago Vota at September 08, 2026 05:27 PM (7hNt2)

286 Bunker: Premise

An architect's marriage is tested after he accepts a project to build a bunker for a billionaire.

Let me guess its Elon Musk as an evvvillll billionaire that has Bardem's company build him a sex dungeon or something

Posted by: 18-1 at September 08, 2026 05:27 PM (sKqQm)

287 Don’t think me unkind
Words are hard to find
They’re only cheques I’ve left unsigned
From the banks of chaos in my mind

And when their eloquence escapes me
Their logic ties me up and rapes me

De joo joo joo de da da da
Is all I want to say to you

Posted by: Trucker Cralson at September 08, 2026 05:28 PM (NtVYv)

288 Also, must have some new music he wants to promote so he's got to say something to remind people he's not dead.

Like Elliot Page whining that she gets no more parts. Yeah well... there are no roles for 5'1 ugly dudes, so you mangled yourself right out of your roles. A short cute girl who is pretty good at acting: plenty of work.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:28 PM (K32Fz)

289 Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at September 08, 2026 05:27 PM (hzuYO)

I want the Defense Attorney to have to use HER for all his child care needs.

Posted by: Romeo13 at September 08, 2026 05:28 PM (mP0Kj)

290 The answer is always …

304

Posted by: Elric the Blade at September 08, 2026 05:28 PM (v/qpK)

291 Babylon Bee: Senate Approves Mitch McConnell Working Remotely From Grave.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at September 08, 2026 05:29 PM (XvL8K)

292 Simon and Garfunkle was maybe sorta kinda OK, but listening to it had the disconcerting effect of causing one's testicles to retract into the abdomen. "

Feeling groovy?

Posted by: man at September 08, 2026 05:29 PM (XuXeR)

293 4+A*(Good Time) = 8675309
-----

*golf clap*

Posted by: Crusader at September 08, 2026 05:29 PM (TN0g+)

294 That's ok, I guess. 71077345 anyone?

I always put a decimal point after 710 to break it up

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at September 08, 2026 05:30 PM (K32Fz)

295 281
The Engineer Guy
Building a Cathedral without Science or Mathematics: The Engineering Method Explained

https://youtu.be/_ivqWN4L3zU
Posted by: Quarter Twenty at September 08, 2026 05:27 PM (2Ez/1)

The Cathedral builders had plenty of math. They weren't just spitballin'.

Posted by: tcn in AK at September 08, 2026 05:30 PM (H9BGx)

296
Yup... why the hell do we pay for all this Military if those who ATTACK US are not scared?
Posted by: Romeo13 at September 08, 2026 05:23 PM (mP0Kj)

Nicky Machiavelli said it best: Let them hate. So long as they fear.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 08, 2026 05:30 PM (y9nCu)

297 According to the trio, they argued so much with the man that the alternate jurors could hear them through a wall.

Posted by: beckster
---

Harassing a juror.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 05:30 PM (AJWch)

298 Money is only morally right if you inherit it or are given it by Arabs for no reason whatsoever.

Posted by: T'Qatar Carlson at September 08, 2026 05:31 PM (TU5Q9)

299 In addition to being the foundation of numerous other areas of practical mathematic & science (physics, chemistry, et. al.) applications -- algebra teaches students abstract thinking.

Clearly, something in which Cucker Qatarlson is lacking ...

Posted by: ShainS at September 08, 2026 05:31 PM (EeAvm)

300 Do you really have to "really know math" to make a kiln?
-------
No. But you're going to need a lot of trial and error. Or access to the result of other people's trial and error.

And it's not as if building a kiln is the epitome of human achievement. People have done it for probably tens of thousands of years. If that's the most complex thing you'll ever want or need to do, sure, you can probably make a serviceable kiln without too much math. If you want to build something a bit more complex, like say a telephone system or a digital computing device, or a friggin' rocket ship, you're definitely going to need some advanced math. So enjoy your little wood-fired kiln while you depend on other people to bring you electricity and clean water so you don't die horribly like most of humanity throughout history.

Posted by: Oddbob at September 08, 2026 05:31 PM (vTZFs)

301 4+A*(Good Time) = 8675309
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 08, 2026 05:26 PM (y9nCu)
——

Good reference. I always thought the song was creepy as hell tho …

Posted by: Elric the Blade at September 08, 2026 05:31 PM (v/qpK)

302 290 The answer is always …

304
Posted by: Elric the Blade at September 08, 2026 05:28 PM (v/qpK)

Nope. 42.

Posted by: tcn in AK at September 08, 2026 05:31 PM (H9BGx)

303 > The actor Terrence Howard thought that any number multiplied by zero producing zero made no sense because it made something disappear.

3 groups of 5 is 15
2 groups of 5 is 10
1 group of 5 is 5
How many is 0 groups of 5?

When you consider 0 groups of 5, have you made the five disappear?

Posted by: bonhomme at September 08, 2026 05:31 PM (mkw2N)

304
4+A*(Good Time) = 8675309
-----

*golf clap*
Posted by: Crusader at September 08, 2026 05:29 PM (TN0g+)

*bows extravagantly*

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 08, 2026 05:32 PM (y9nCu)

305 I thought the Ehrabs invented the Algebra ?

Posted by: Hatari somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 08, 2026 05:32 PM (NtVYv)

306 I think we have pretty clear circumstantial evidence that T'qur Qtarlson both ate the yellow snow and the brown acid. I believe that the cheese done slid offa his cracker.

Posted by: Bonecrusher at September 08, 2026 05:32 PM (7aGEe)

307 always put a decimal point after 710 to break it up"

Break it up? NOOOOOO!

/heh

Posted by: man at September 08, 2026 05:32 PM (XuXeR)

308 225 length x width = Area
interest = principal x rate x time
pay = hours worked x hourly rate

Most people have used at least one of these equations in a practical way at some point in their life.
---

Is math

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 05:32 PM (AJWch)

309 Jewish letters (or are they Greek?), and Arabic numerals.
It's obviously a more vast conspiracy than Tucker and his guest ever suspected, encompassing the entire eastern Mediterranean.

I have a gut feeling that Turkey and the Syrians are also involved.

Posted by: SpeakingOf at September 08, 2026 05:32 PM (6ydKt)

310 >>>Algebra Is a Jewish Plot to Confuse the Goys by Sticking Letters Into Math

Those fiends! Just think how much easier life would be if we never had to solve for x.

Posted by: No Name Today at September 08, 2026 05:33 PM (8mulE)

311 Feeling groovy?

To be fair, it's a much better song if you are unaware of the Liberace version.

Posted by: Oddbob at September 08, 2026 05:33 PM (vTZFs)

312 297 According to the trio, they argued so much with the man that the alternate jurors could hear them through a wall.

Posted by: beckster
---

Harassing a juror.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 05:30 PM (AJWch)

Probably considered perfectly normal by the ghouls who think this bitch needs to be exonerated because she has a vagina and used it.

"Respect mah authoritah!"

Posted by: tcn in AK at September 08, 2026 05:33 PM (H9BGx)

313 Fucking sumerians

Posted by: Hatari somewhere on Ventura Highway at September 08, 2026 05:33 PM (NtVYv)

314 306 I think we have pretty clear circumstantial evidence that T'qur Qtarlson both ate the yellow snow and the brown acid. I believe that the cheese done slid offa his cracker.

Posted by: Bonecrusher
---

Something happened.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 05:33 PM (AJWch)

315 Level, plumb, and square.

That's the way, uh-huh, uh-huh
We like it!

Posted by: Freemasons at September 08, 2026 05:33 PM (wVcYX)

316 The first book of algebra was written by a Muslim and titled "al Jabr." Tuquer is indeed using that as his words are all jabber.

Posted by: Durak Kazyol at September 08, 2026 05:34 PM (3jvch)

317 When you consider 0 groups of 5, have you made the five disappear?"

Woah.

Dave's not here, man ...

Posted by: man at September 08, 2026 05:34 PM (XuXeR)

318 Why does the Jenny Song have "876-5309" as the choris? I mean, who dances to numbers? I'm just asking questions here, but couldn't the song be coded, or a Jewish plot?

Posted by: T'Qatar Carlson at September 08, 2026 05:34 PM (TU5Q9)

319 To be fair, it's a much better song if you are unaware of the Liberace version."

Who among us is not aware?

Posted by: man at September 08, 2026 05:35 PM (XuXeR)

320 The answer is always …

304

Posted by: Elric the Blade at September 08, 2026 05:28 PM (v/qpK)

----------------

Or when using "letters" that spells "LUPUS."

/BTW, nobody tell Cucker that Hebrew traditionally uses its 22 alphabet letters to represent numbers in a system similar to Roman numerals. This method, known as Gematria, assigns specific numeric values to each letter, which are then combined to form larger numbers.

Posted by: ShainS at September 08, 2026 05:35 PM (EeAvm)

321 We lost Fern Liebowitz due to a terrible Kiln explosion. Was algebra to blame? I think not.

Posted by: Common Tater at September 08, 2026 05:35 PM (+/Ezd)

322
I think we have pretty clear circumstantial evidence that T'qur Qtarlson both ate the yellow snow and the brown acid. I believe that the cheese done slid offa his cracker.

Posted by: Bonecrusher
---

Something happened.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 05:33 PM (AJWch)

The Qatari check cleared.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at September 08, 2026 05:35 PM (y9nCu)

323 313 Fucking sumerians

Posted by: Hatari somewhere on Ventura Highway
--

Better than the winterians.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 05:36 PM (AJWch)

324 197 Do you really have to "really know math" to make a kiln?
Posted by: 29Victor at September 08, 2026 05:08 PM (0MjtC)

Uhhh ... yeah !!!

Ask me how I know ?

Posted by: zombie Fawn Leibowicz at September 08, 2026 05:36 PM (oCio0)

325 I think Carlson suffers from Hippie-envy. He was a tassel-loafered (no socks, of course) bourgeoisie kid who envied the Jerry Garcia types but didn't have the sand to forsake all that affluence and privilege. Now he's trying to make up for lost counter-cultural cred. But self-hate and anti-Zionist zeal have broken his mind.

Posted by: Ordinary American at September 08, 2026 05:36 PM (7s9Qe)

326 317 When you consider 0 groups of 5, have you made the five disappear?"

Woah.

Dave's not here, man ...
Posted by: man at September 08, 2026 05:34 PM (XuXeR)

Well, yes! Say you start with 2 groups of 5, and they're sitting over there. And now, 5 groups of 5, maybe in a little cluster. And now 0 groups of

*BOOM*!

Posted by: m at September 08, 2026 05:37 PM (odBC9)

327 Nothin from nothin leaves nothin.

Posted by: Billy Preston at September 08, 2026 05:37 PM (Fn+3X)

328 Remember The Rural Juror?

Nobody can say it.

Posted by: Count de Monet at September 08, 2026 05:37 PM (wVcYX)

329 Banach-Tarski paradox, anyone? I need a bigger sphere….

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at September 08, 2026 05:37 PM (gkBVP)

330 Deep Thought: the answer is 42

Posted by: Smell the Glove at September 08, 2026 05:38 PM (v6vok)

331 314 306 I think we have pretty clear circumstantial evidence that T'qur Qtarlson both ate the yellow snow and the brown acid. I believe that the cheese done slid offa his cracker.

Posted by: Bonecrusher
---

Something happened.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 05:33 PM (AJWch)
*******
It all started with either the demon visit or the anal probing of the alien. I am unsure which came first. Har.

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at September 08, 2026 05:38 PM (hzuYO)

332 Nothin from nothin leaves nothin.
Posted by: Billy Preston

This guy gets it.

Posted by: Jayne Cobb at September 08, 2026 05:38 PM (vTZFs)

333 To be fair, it's a much better song if you are unaware of the Liberace version."
>>>
Who among us is not aware?
Posted by: man at September 08, 2026 05:35 PM (XuXeR)

*raises hand*

Posted by: Count de Monet at September 08, 2026 05:39 PM (wVcYX)

334 SciVo's Law: All grifters eventually end up sounding alike.

SciVo's Corollary: All grifters eventually end up blaming Jews.

It isn't even politics, let alone horseshoe theory. It's just scammers doing whatever works. It's the postmodern "nihilistic lying" of neither knowing nor caring whether their words are true, so long as they're effective.

Posted by: SciVo at September 08, 2026 05:39 PM (ke3zm)

335
/BTW, nobody tell Cucker that Hebrew traditionally uses its 22 alphabet letters to represent numbers in a system similar to Roman numerals. This method, known as Gematria, assigns specific numeric values to each letter, which are then combined to form larger numbers.

Posted by: ShainS
---

Numerology, I knew it!
_Tucker

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at September 08, 2026 05:39 PM (AJWch)

336 nood

Posted by: Gref at September 08, 2026 05:39 PM (5rh/l)

337 Pookette needs to never see this clip. She just started algebra, and has been pestering me on why it's always random letters. I have been trying for years to get her to use the fraction to percentage shortcut, but that involves algebra, and therefore is suspect.

Posted by: pookysgirl, talking to a brick wall at September 08, 2026 05:40 PM (Wt5PA)

338 Nood, Quick Hits

Posted by: SciVo at September 08, 2026 05:41 PM (ke3zm)

339 preemptive desock

Posted by: Oddbob at September 08, 2026 05:41 PM (vTZFs)

340 The actor Terrence Howard thought that any number multiplied by zero producing zero made no sense because it made something disappear. Representing something be hard
Posted by: Smell the Glove at September 08, 2026 05:25 PM (v6vok)

odd. Depending on your order it is either 2 nothings or no 2's. In both cases the answer of 0 is obvious.

Posted by: Oldcat at September 08, 2026 05:44 PM (uhVAy)

341 Those of us who actually listen to his interviews know you are lying just like the “Nazis are very fine people” and “Iran war will last a week, max” liars lied. Keep lying cause it’s definitely working!

Posted by: Jumpininhere at September 08, 2026 05:48 PM (LGV74)

342 Find x

This is how I wanted to answer all of the algebra quizzes from HS through college.

With the added twist of why do you care because I don't? Let x remain free!

I was an unruly student at times. On my first nursing psych quiz, and I hated it, I made an A. After a lot of moaning to anyone in the class, the professor and my bf/husband who'd try to explain it to me.

The professor smirked and announced I made the top grade and my classmates snarled at me. I continued to say I did not understand. The professor, who was also head of the nursing program, said, "That's because you are in a fugue state." I said I reckon so.

I hated clinicals the most. Totally worthless for me to pretend to do the bare minimum of nursing vs give me an infected incision to clean. Or post-op heart surgery. That I understood. I was nice but hopeless in psych nursing.

We had to go to a chronic nursing home for a month where the men fought over cig butts and the sad women rocked baby dolls.

We were supposed to figure out a "care plan." The best I could come up with, which we did not present to the instructor, was to divide the men into teams to see how many cig butts were won.

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at September 08, 2026 05:55 PM (hzuYO)

343 Nothin from nothin leaves nothin.

Nothin’ divided by nothin’ means everythin’.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at September 08, 2026 05:56 PM (VJ1er)

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