First World Problems...

Power in but no power out suggests to even the most incompetent homeowner that the controller is shot. And that requires a replacement! The fancy new one in the photo even has a humidity gauge, so the attic vent fan will turn on when the mice up there are uncomfortable, not just hot!

But attics tend to be at the top of most houses...up a flight of stairs and some sort of magic carpet to get into the attic itself. And breaker panels tend to be in basements (at least around here), and basements tend to be at the bottom of most houses... DOWN a flight of stairs.

Yes, that adds up to two flights plus a ladder and an awkward climb into the attic.

And it gets worse! Most electricians and sane people suggest turning off the power before working with household power. Supposedly 120 volts AC at 60 Hz and a bunch of amps does not play well with the human body, in particular the bunch of small muscles called the heart.

Probably just a bunch of internet know-it-alls, but they might be on to something.

So how to figure out which breaker controls the fan? What? No, they are not labeled. At least not well enough. So I can buy a circuit breaker finder, which means I can clip it onto the power feeding the fan, then check each breaker until the magic wand goes beep. Or ... and this is less exciting ... I can go back and forth and up and down 27 times, turning off one unidentified breaker at a time until I stumble on the correct one.

I am confident that I will never use the circuit breaker finder after this little project, but if I don't buy it, there will be a project in the next two weeks that will require it.

That is a fine example of Schrodinger's Homeowner's Paradox. The repair both exists and doesn't exist. But I will be in existential OCD agony until I find out!

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 I am confident that I will never use the circuit breaker finder after this little project, but if I don't buy it, there will be a project in the next two weeks that will require it.

Can you rent one at Home Depot or someplace?

Posted by: weft cut-loop at August 23, 2026 02:03 PM (diia5)

2 Can you rent one at Home Depot or someplace?

Posted by: weft cut-loop at August 23, 2026 02:03 PM (diia5)

It's not really expensive (maybe $65), and I wouldn't trust a rental.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 23, 2026 02:04 PM (k5CNB)

3 If you have another person you can have them watch one end while you flip breakers.

Note: the right one will be one or two *after* you power cycle something *really* important that doesn't like being power cycled.

Posted by: KCSteve at August 23, 2026 02:09 PM (2+WvJ)

4 Oooh! I feel ya! When we had the generator installed, we had the original box rewired with new CBs and updated with some extra circuits added for the garden, and a dedicated circuit for the hot tub. Just bite the bullet and pay for it CBD. The peace of mind alone is worth it.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 23, 2026 02:09 PM (3Ope8)

5 If the box is actually unlabelled?

Getting it labelled is your first priority, IMO. Call the Mrs on the cellphone, have her find where the lights/outlets go out when you flip a breaker (be prepared, if you have an older house, for it to take 1-5 minutes for an LED bulb to lose enough power to turn off).

Then, your breaker box properly OCD'd, you can replace the controller.

Drives me nuts when a breaker box is poorly or unlabelled.

Posted by: RandomDave (if you can spare a bit, please click) at August 23, 2026 02:09 PM (aJQbY)

6 Forty five bucks or so, a buck and a half per flight. Buy the tester.

Posted by: From about That Time at August 23, 2026 02:10 PM (sl73Y)

7 Electric is not my strong suit

Posted by: Skip at August 23, 2026 02:10 PM (Ia/+0)

8 Or get some to help and shout back and forth.

Posted by: From about That Time at August 23, 2026 02:11 PM (sl73Y)

9 I'd start banging around in there with a big screwdriver.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at August 23, 2026 02:14 PM (fkE/s)

10 (1) Plug a radio into the fan circuit.
(2) Turn radio up loud enough to hear at the breaker box.
(3) Turn off breakers one-by-one until the radio goes silent.
(4) Label the breaker.

Posted by: a.moron at August 23, 2026 02:16 PM (X5Jzz)

11 There is another way. Wife in Attic, you at panel. Yell at the top of your lungs. Pick phrases that are easily misunderstood or better yet misconstrued.

Marita bliss ensues.

Posted by: Pete Bog at August 23, 2026 02:22 PM (T35sK)

12 On the topic of FWPs, I completed switching out my 10 year-old home desktop for a factory fresh model with a 14-core CPU and a 1-TB SSD.

The process was surprisingly glitch-free and the new rig is a speed monster.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at August 23, 2026 02:23 PM (4xTFE)

13 Ok, this reminds me of installing the new doorbell cam a few weeks ago. After about 7 trips up and down from the basement, I stationed 2 of the young-uns. One to ring the existing doorbell. The other to pass messages up/down from the basement where I was tripping the breakers. Eventually found the RIGHT breaker after abour 20 minutes of trial and error. For some UNHOLY reason, the breaker for the front door doorbell was also the breaker for the SECOND FLOOR TV room.

-SLV

Posted by: Shy Lurking Voter at August 23, 2026 02:23 PM (7kJyR)

14 Cell phones beat old Nextel walky-talky

Posted by: Skip at August 23, 2026 02:28 PM (Ia/+0)

15 Short to ground is the best circuit breaker finder.

Posted by: Roy at August 23, 2026 02:28 PM (zhWvq)

16 FWP

The specialty grocery store I go to did not have the raspberry jam I like, so I had to settle for blueberry jam.

Posted by: Savage Henry at August 23, 2026 02:29 PM (ZxPkt)

17 It's about 108 outside. Sitting on the patio under the fan after doing lawn work is pretty uncomfortable but that crawl in the attic silliness ain't happening.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 23, 2026 02:29 PM (3Ope8)

18 Or get some to help and shout back and forth.

Posted by: From about That Time at August 23, 2026 02:11 PM (sl73Y)
-

In the first world, we do not shout back and forth!

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at August 23, 2026 02:30 PM (vUecY)

19 14 Cell phones beat old Nextel walky-talky
Posted by: Skip at August 23, 2026 02:28 PM (Ia/+0)

That assumes you have cell (or wifi) connection in the basment where the breaker is... Mine is an abyssal blackhole that devours even light.

-SLV

Posted by: Shy Lurking Voter at August 23, 2026 02:30 PM (7kJyR)

20 Whatever amount of money you’re saving by not calling an electrician is not worth it.

Posted by: Sandy Cocazio Ortez at August 23, 2026 02:30 PM (bXsD6)

21 Note: the right one will be one or two *after* you power cycle something *really* important that doesn't like being power cycled.

There are little numbers on the CB like "15" and "20". I'm guessing anything going to the attic is of the "15" variety. Important stuff is probably 240 and a double breaker. And if some of them are labeled, the attic is likely to be the unlabeled one.

Or just accept the whole problem, put on a headlamp, throw the whole house breaker and git 'er done.

Posted by: Community Notes at August 23, 2026 02:33 PM (a4flb)

22 Short to ground is the best circuit breaker finder.

And practically every cheap circuit tester has one.

Posted by: Community Notes at August 23, 2026 02:34 PM (a4flb)

23 Another mother kills her own children:

https://tinyurl.com/54neazvw

Will there be a tsunami of these?

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at August 23, 2026 02:35 PM (vUecY)

24 Drives me nuts when a breaker box is poorly or unlabelled.

I have a print of the house, every outlet and switch has a breaker number attached to it. So if an outlet needs some attention, I know exactly what breaker to throw and red tag.

Posted by: Community Notes at August 23, 2026 02:37 PM (a4flb)

25 Buy the tool! You know you want to...

*ruhruhruh*

Posted by: Tim 'The Tool Man' Taylor at August 23, 2026 02:38 PM (rdVOm)

26 Don’t know much, but this I’m sure of, don’t stick your flat screwdriver in anything but straight screwheads. Same for phillips screwdrivers and phillips head screws. A little electrical birds ‘n bees for you.

Posted by: Eromero at August 23, 2026 02:38 PM (LHPAg)

27 I moved into a century-old house and faced the problem of not knowing which breaker most of the outlets were on. So I spent one Saturday trudging up and down the stairs (my breaker box is in the basement) and confirming what breaker controlled which outlet (of which there were dozens). However, I made a spreadsheet that recorded the mapping of breakers to outlets, then printed a copy and hung it on the wall next to the breaker box. So I and whoever lives in this house after me will not have to do that nonsense again.

Posted by: Nemo at August 23, 2026 02:38 PM (4RPgu)

28 Two cell phones...video chat...
Have fan on with one cell phone camera pointed at it, while you're with the other down with the breakers, switching off and on the breakers one at a time...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 02:42 PM (l3cgK)

29 Find a neighbor or friend with small children and borrow a baby monitor so you can tell when the fan has turned off - just like you use a loud radio to identify if you've turned off power to the outlet in question.
I suppose you could also accomplish the same thing with two cell phones.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at August 23, 2026 02:42 PM (2Ez/1)

30 My FWP is a garage door spring went so only have 1 of the pair working. Wrenched my back opening it.

And Mgid only messes with my phone, not my tablet

Posted by: Skip at August 23, 2026 02:43 PM (Ia/+0)

31 connect a very long extension cord to the circuit, run it down to the basement, connect a lamp to it...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 02:45 PM (l3cgK)

32 Another mother kills her own children:

https://tinyurl.com/54neazvw

Will there be a tsunami of these?
Posted by: Biden's Dog
------

I think that Magda Goebbels set the standard. For those not familiar:

She left a letter, excerpt:
On May 1, 1945, Joseph and Magda Goebbels poisoned their six children in the bunker under the Berlin Reich Chancellery and then committed suicide. In a farewell letter to her son Harald Quandt (the son of her first husband), Magda explained that the Goebbels children could not grow up in a society without National Socialism.

My emphasis.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 23, 2026 02:46 PM (XeU6L)

33 She left a letter, excerpt:
On May 1, 1945, Joseph and Magda Goebbels poisoned their six children in the bunker under the Berlin Reich Chancellery and then committed suicide. In a farewell letter to her son Harald Quandt (the son of her first husband), Magda explained that the Goebbels children could not grow up in a society without National Socialism.

My emphasis.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 23, 2026 02:46 PM (XeU6L)

Not could not, would not, and she made damn sure of it.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 02:51 PM (l3cgK)

34 Verily, those who label individual circuit breakers as to function will have their reward in Heaven.
-----
previous: Naptha is commonly known as "Coleman stove and lantern fuel", and has done a moon shot in price, around 17 bucks a gallon, and is becoming harder to find as LED lanterns and propane, butane, have largely supplanted gasoline fired camping equipment. It's also known as "Lighter fluid" and purchased in that form and packaging is probably closer to a C note per gallon. If you're a fan of Zippo lighters, a gallon can should keep you set for some time.

It is a first distillate of gasoline, without any octane, or about 50 octane. The chief advantage in stoves or lanterns is it does not sour or spoil in stove or lantern fount. You can drag a campstove out of the garage 20 years from now and it will fire right up no problem. Ordinary gasoline will have turned to a stinky goo, and the appliance ruined for all practical purposes.

Historically when gasoline was 2 bucks naphtha was about 5 or 6, I'm not sure why it is so expensive. Shipping and Handling in the case of Coleman fuel, maybe hazmat. Less demand, ironically maybe. Why does Japan need it, might be a question.

Posted by: Common Tater at August 23, 2026 02:52 PM (3ErUN)

35 Brings to mind the three light switches puzzle: Three switches outside a room lit with an incadescent bulb. One goes to the light, other two are dead. How can you determine which works with only one chance to go in the room and check results of your flip switching?

I whiffed on this 40 years ago in a practical reasoning class.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at August 23, 2026 02:53 PM (XvL8K)

36 I'd start banging around in there with a big screwdriver
----
This guy gets it. Also useful for troubleshooting around in the back of old school Cathode Ray tube Televisions. Mark of a professional!

Posted by: Common Tater at August 23, 2026 02:55 PM (3ErUN)

37
Fauci's lawyers launch a fundraiser to raise money for his legal defense.

FauciLegalDefense.com

Doesn't the evil weasel have enough money to pay for this??

Posted by: four seasons at August 23, 2026 02:56 PM (/QHx4)

38 Biff,

Right, that's the one where you have to assume you have the time (patience) to wait for the bulb to heat up... and that there are no circuit issues... and that the switch doesn't control anything else... and that any of the switches at all are valid.

Posted by: RandomDave (if you can spare a bit, please click) at August 23, 2026 02:56 PM (aJQbY)

39 As an aside, working out the wiring for a circuit with two-way switches. I had to draw it out. It is essentally an Exclusive Nor gate.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 23, 2026 02:57 PM (XeU6L)

40 four seasons,

Wish we could redirect that nonsense to some of our brethren and sistren in need!

Posted by: RandomDave (if you can spare a bit, please click) at August 23, 2026 02:58 PM (aJQbY)

41
RandomDave,

Yep

Posted by: four seasons at August 23, 2026 02:58 PM (/QHx4)

42 Or get some to help and shout back and forth.
Posted by: From about That Time

Yup that's what hubby and I did. Easy peasy.

Posted by: Tuna at August 23, 2026 02:58 PM (lJ0H4)

43 Thats Leftism, help your superiors defend themselves, while they lounge by the pool

Posted by: Skip at August 23, 2026 02:59 PM (Ia/+0)

44 FWP

The specialty grocery store I go to did not have the raspberry jam I like, so I had to settle for blueberry jam.
Posted by: Savage Henry

Damn. That's a tough one. Condolences.

Posted by: Tuna at August 23, 2026 03:01 PM (lJ0H4)

45 RandomDave,

Yep
Posted by: four seasons
______

I missed on the test because the heat issue didnt even occur to me.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at August 23, 2026 03:01 PM (XvL8K)

46 Historically when gasoline was 2 bucks naphtha was about 5 or 6, I'm not sure why it is so expensive.

Another reason to blame and hate Trump—naphtha by the shipload load is being sent to VZ for their heavy crude processing.

Posted by: Community Notes at August 23, 2026 03:03 PM (a4flb)

47 This weeks FWP:
I hate tv shows where the character's cell phone rings and it sounds just like mine.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 23, 2026 03:03 PM (2WIwB)

48 Fauci's lawyers launch a fundraiser to raise money for his legal defense.

FauciLegalDefense.com

Doesn't the evil weasel have enough money to pay for this??

Posted by: four seasons

Using someone else's money is always better.

Posted by: Tuna at August 23, 2026 03:03 PM (lJ0H4)

49 ...so I had to settle for blueberry jam.

Posted by: Savage Henry at August 23, 2026 02:29 PM (ZxPkt)

What the hell were you thinking? That's crossing the streams...tearing the fabric of the universe!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 23, 2026 03:04 PM (k5CNB)

50 Savage Henry,

Not Strawberry or Blackberry?!

Biff,

I only know the answer cuz I saw it on one of those brain teaser vids on u-tube.

Posted by: RandomDave (if you can spare a bit, please click) at August 23, 2026 03:07 PM (aJQbY)

51 50 Savage Henry,

Not Strawberry or Blackberry?!

Biff,

I only know the answer cuz I saw it on one of those brain teaser vids on u-tube.

Posted by: RandomDave (if you can spare a bit, please click) at August 23, 2026 03:07 PM (aJQbY)

I'm fine with almost all jams, except toe jam...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:08 PM (l3cgK)

52 47 This weeks FWP:
I hate tv shows where the character's cell phone rings and it sounds just like mine.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 23, 2026 03:03 PM (2WIwB)

I hate radio commercials with car horns honking.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:08 PM (l3cgK)

53 I hate tv shows where the character's cell phone rings and it sounds just like mine.
Posted by: Diogenes at August 23, 2026 03:03 PM (2WIwB)
___

lol

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:10 PM (YlYJ8)

54
Raspberry is the best.

Posted by: four seasons at August 23, 2026 03:11 PM (/QHx4)

55 Biff,

I only know the answer cuz I saw it on one of those brain teaser vids on u-tube.

Posted by: RandomDave
_________

What makes it more infuriating is that I then lost $20 bucks betting a buddy that he couldn't figure it out within ten minutes. It took him less than five.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at August 23, 2026 03:12 PM (XvL8K)

56 Honestly, would rather have pie than jam...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:13 PM (l3cgK)

57 Heat waves suck.

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at August 23, 2026 03:13 PM (/HWjm)

58 Outside reading and failing asleep

Posted by: Skip at August 23, 2026 03:14 PM (Ia/+0)

59 I'm laid up on the couch after a bug of some sort bit me on the leg while I was asleep, and now said leg has swollen up considerably from my knee to my toes.

It hurts like hell when I walk on it, but the benadryl is helping with the itching, so there's that.

Though I am a bit loopy at the moment.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:14 PM (YlYJ8)

60 I had a 3 story house at one time with an attic fan on the top level. Large fan. Louvers that opened when the fan turned on... with a switch, no thermostat.

Loudest thing I've ever had operate in any house I've owned. Moved a massive amount of air, but ran at about 200 decibels. No speeds. Just loud, or off.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 23, 2026 03:15 PM (2Cry5)

61 59 I'm laid up on the couch after a bug of some sort bit me on the leg while I was asleep, and now said leg has swollen up considerably from my knee to my toes.

It hurts like hell when I walk on it, but the benadryl is helping with the itching, so there's that.

Though I am a bit loopy at the moment.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:14 PM (YlYJ

I hope it wasn't venomous...like a black widow...
swelling is not good. You might want to have it looked it.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:15 PM (l3cgK)

62 60 I had a 3 story house at one time with an attic fan on the top level. Large fan. Louvers that opened when the fan turned on... with a switch, no thermostat.

Loudest thing I've ever had operate in any house I've owned. Moved a massive amount of air, but ran at about 200 decibels. No speeds. Just loud, or off.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 23, 2026 03:15 PM (2Cry5)

And you ain't deef yet?

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:16 PM (l3cgK)

63 What makes it more infuriating is that I then lost $20 bucks betting a buddy that he couldn't figure it out within ten minutes. It took him less than five.

Doesn't work so well in the LED age and a hot attic.

Posted by: Community Notes at August 23, 2026 03:16 PM (a4flb)

64 I hope it wasn't venomous...like a black widow...
swelling is not good. You might want to have it looked it.
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:15 PM (l3cgK)
___

If it was a black widow, I would have gone into shock.

This was either a mosquito or whatever flying bugs they got here in the Ozarks.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:19 PM (YlYJ8)

65 This week's FWP.

Largest branch from neighbor's 160 year-old oak tree fell down during a storm on my garage. (I don't think two Morons could join hands around the trunk.)

Decking and obsolete clay tiles destroyed in droves. Hip rafter also shattered.

Their insurance company is already gearing up to fight against covering the damage.

I don't mind the insurance model where we pay premiums and they pay damages. I am much less fond of the model where we pay premiums and they never pay out any losses!

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at August 23, 2026 03:20 PM (HlyYF)

66 Loudest thing I've ever had operate in any house I've owned. Moved a massive amount of air, but ran at about 200 decibels. No speeds. Just loud, or off.
Posted by: Martini Farmer
_________

I have one of those and barely use it for that reason. Growing up, we had one of those double fan exhaust window inserts that was even louder.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at August 23, 2026 03:20 PM (XvL8K)

67 64 I hope it wasn't venomous...like a black widow...
swelling is not good. You might want to have it looked it.
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:15 PM (l3cgK)
___

If it was a black widow, I would have gone into shock.

This was either a mosquito or whatever flying bugs they got here in the Ozarks.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:19 PM (YlYJ

Mosquito swells your entire lower leg?

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:20 PM (l3cgK)

68 You know you need the stair work to for it.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 23, 2026 03:20 PM (UdHDF)

69 My immune system goes into overdrive when it comes to mosquito or ant bites.

Not enough for me to stop breathing, just enough that area bitten swells up, I get a fever, and I feel like crap for a day or two.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:21 PM (YlYJ8)

70 I don't mind the insurance model where we pay premiums and they pay damages. I am much less fond of the model where we pay premiums and they never pay out any losses!

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at August 23, 2026 03:20 PM (HlyYF)

Some insurance companies will fight you tooth and nail, even if they're in the wrong.
I've hears some auto insurance companies are like that. And God help you if you're ever hit by an San Diego Police car...the f'n city will fight tooth and nail against you...using your tax dollars they way it was intended, certainly.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:22 PM (l3cgK)

71 52 47 This weeks FWP:
I hate tv shows where the character's cell phone rings and it sounds just like mine.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 23, 2026 03:03 PM (2WIwB)

I hate radio commercials with car horns honking.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:08 PM

I hate the ones with a siren in the background.

My response while driving is to tap the brakes and then head on a swivel to spot the emergency vehicle.

I always end up turning off my radio - just to confirm.

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at August 23, 2026 03:22 PM (HlyYF)

72 Mosquito swells your entire lower leg?
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:20 PM (l3cgK)
___

Crazy, isn't it.

I'm deathly allergic to bee venom, and I'm very sensitive to pretty much any insect venom, including mosquitos, biting flies, and ants.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:23 PM (YlYJ8)

73 How do you know the tree is 160 years old?

Posted by: I gotta ask at August 23, 2026 03:24 PM (2Ez/1)

74 59 I'm laid up on the couch after a bug of some sort bit me on the leg while I was asleep, and now said leg has swollen up considerably from my knee to my toes.

It hurts like hell when I walk on it, but the benadryl is helping with the itching, so there's that.

Though I am a bit loopy at the moment.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:14 PM

Sorry SMH.

A baggie of ice is also good "medication" for a massive histamine response, and it does NOT have any negative side effects.

I bet Ex-Ex would be a dear for you.

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at August 23, 2026 03:25 PM (HlyYF)

75 Now Canada is getting cut off, any chance they might send a carrier strike force and bomb Pearl Harbor?

Posted by: Skip at August 23, 2026 03:27 PM (Ia/+0)

76 73 How do you know the tree is 160 years old?

Posted by: I gotta ask at August 23, 2026 03:24 PM (2Ez/1)

That gets to the core of the question...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:28 PM (l3cgK)

77 Oh. Not 'one'-th, then … ?

Posted by: Dr_No at August 23, 2026 03:28 PM (ayRl+)

78 72 Mosquito swells your entire lower leg?
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:20 PM (l3cgK)
___

Crazy, isn't it.

I'm deathly allergic to bee venom, and I'm very sensitive to pretty much any insect venom, including mosquitos, biting flies, and ants.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:23 PM (YlYJ

That's awful.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:28 PM (l3cgK)

79 A baggie of ice is also good "medication" for a massive histamine response, and it does NOT have any negative side effects.

I bet Ex-Ex would be a dear for you.
Posted by: Pillage Idiot at August 23, 2026 03:25 PM (HlyYF)
___

I have been using my ice pack, ALOT the past 24 hours.

Since I was asleep, whatever bit me had plenty of time to feed before my immune system went all "Oh hell no, not today Satan!" and proceeded to make my leg a battleground.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:28 PM (YlYJ8)

80 I have about $4K worth of multimeters and probes, - you can borrow one of mine. If you want me to do it, it will cost you.

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at August 23, 2026 03:30 PM (FR9Sb)

81 One of my lineman swelled up like a balloon after getting tore up by flying ants.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at August 23, 2026 03:30 PM (ZLygy)

82 Ex-Ex has been an absolute darling of a husband, and I thank God that he was sent to me.

But I know how I am when I'm not in the best of moods, and so I also thank God that he has a separate work building to escape to.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:31 PM (YlYJ8)

83 How do you know the tree is 160 years old?

Posted by: I gotta ask at August 23, 2026 03:24 PM (2Ez/1)

That gets to the core of the question...
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:28 PM (l3cgK)

My insurance company could run rings around this case.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 23, 2026 03:31 PM (2WIwB)

84 One of my lineman swelled up like a balloon after getting tore up by flying ants.
Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at August 23, 2026 03:30 PM (ZLygy)
___

*shudders*
That's why I have an epipen 24/7...just in case.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:32 PM (YlYJ8)

85 73 How do you know the tree is 160 years old?

Posted by: I gotta ask at August 23, 2026 03:24 PM

Good question.

They have a massive English Oak. My house has a massive Bur Oak.

County extension agent estimated they were both around 140 years old (twenty years ago).

The original farmhouse in the area was built in 1866, so I figured they planted both trees about the time they moved in.

(I hope this doesn't violate the AOS Style Guide regarding math posts.)

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at August 23, 2026 03:32 PM (HlyYF)

86 83 How do you know the tree is 160 years old?

Posted by: I gotta ask at August 23, 2026 03:24 PM (2Ez/1)

That gets to the core of the question...
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:28 PM (l3cgK)

My insurance company could run rings around this case.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 23, 2026 03:31 PM (2WIwB)

I wouldn't want to go out on a limb on their response, however.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:33 PM (l3cgK)

87 85 73 How do you know the tree is 160 years old?

Posted by: I gotta ask at August 23, 2026 03:24 PM

Good question.

They have a massive English Oak. My house has a massive Bur Oak.

County extension agent estimated they were both around 140 years old (twenty years ago).

The original farmhouse in the area was built in 1866, so I figured they planted both trees about the time they moved in.

(I hope this doesn't violate the AOS Style Guide regarding math posts.)

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at August 23, 2026 03:32 PM (HlyYF)

if you can't count it on your fingers and toes (or fingers, toes, and pants down), it's too much math...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:34 PM (l3cgK)

88 letter to her son Harald Quandt (the son of her first husband),

The Quandt family owns BMW now.

Posted by: free tibet at August 23, 2026 03:36 PM (iNp3L)

89 .
Attic vent fans ALWAYS wear out, so remember to not forget to modify the Romex going to the unit, (huh huh, huh huh,) with something like:
.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrRxOTovmjA
.
Use your imagination.

Posted by: Marooned at August 23, 2026 03:36 PM (W2rvL)

90 75 Now Canada is getting cut off, any chance they might send a carrier strike force and bomb Pearl Harbor?
Posted by: Skip at August 23, 2026 03:27 PM (Ia/+0)

Not sure Canada could even send a Coast Guard Cutter, but believe they are still in better shape than the UK Navy. Rule Brittania,...*snort laugh*

-SLV

Posted by: Shy Lurking Voter at August 23, 2026 03:36 PM (7kJyR)

91 That's awful.
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:28 PM (l3cgK)
___

My youngest daughter is allergic to poison ivy but not insect bites.

I'm the opposite. Poison ivy doesn't affect me, but I swell up if a mosquito looks at me sideways.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:36 PM (YlYJ8)

92 Be happy that a family of nasty little mice didn't crawl up in you gear and make a nest and have babies. Don't mess with the hantavirus.

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at August 23, 2026 03:36 PM (FR9Sb)

93 I love trees, just not by the house. Let your neighbors have the wonderful Sugar Maples, you've got a better view of the fall colors than they do anyhow. Since the Karens outlawed leaf burning, a relaxing fall ritual is now a huge fucking pain in the ass, too.

Trees are just trouble in the yard, I discovered. They also cost a small fortune to have removed properly. Shade is nice, no doubt about that. But since everyone wants quick shade, they planted what are essentially weed species. Moisture seeking roots foul sewer lines, water mains, buckle sidewalks, and drop shit on your car and roof in ice and windstorms. I'm looking at you, Silver Maple.

Posted by: Common Tater at August 23, 2026 03:36 PM (3ErUN)

94 Some insurance companies will fight you tooth and nail, even if they're in the wrong.
------

Progressive. Their policy owner rammed my truck. In spite of police report, eye witness, they refused to settle for the damage. 'Sue the owner' they said. I'm not getting into that.

Then, Liberty Mutual cancelled my home owners insurance after hurricane Hellene.

We tend to forget that insurers are only in the game for profits, not for protecting their policy holders.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 23, 2026 03:37 PM (XeU6L)

95 82 Ex-Ex has been an absolute darling of a husband, and I thank God that he was sent to me.

But I know how I am when I'm not in the best of moods, and so I also thank God that he has a separate work building to escape to.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:31 PM

It took a few years of marriage, but I am now smart enough to know (mostly) when Bride of PI wants me nearby ... and when she doesn't.

And that right there is a very valuable piece of knowledge!

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at August 23, 2026 03:37 PM (HlyYF)

96 My daughter makes an amazing bug repellent, but I usually apply it before I go outside, not before I go to bed.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:37 PM (YlYJ8)

97 (I hope this doesn't violate the AOS Style Guide regarding math posts.)
----
That's Arithmetic. Should be fine.

Posted by: Common Tater at August 23, 2026 03:38 PM (3ErUN)

98 96 My daughter makes an amazing bug repellent, but I usually apply it before I go outside, not before I go to bed.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:37 PM (YlYJ

Your daughter is a bug repellent?

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:39 PM (l3cgK)

99 Progressive. Their policy owner rammed my truck. In spite of police report, eye witness, they refused to settle for the damage. 'Sue the owner' they said. I'm not getting into that.

Posted by: Mike Hammer
___________

Threaten a bad faith suit. That usually gets their attention.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at August 23, 2026 03:39 PM (XvL8K)

100 if you can't count it on your fingers and toes (or fingers, toes, and pants down), it's too much math...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:34 PM

One of my daughters has rescued several polydactyl cats.

Among her six cats, they can almost count to 160!

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at August 23, 2026 03:39 PM (HlyYF)

101 #34 was napha also known as white gas?

Posted by: From about That Time at August 23, 2026 03:39 PM (sl73Y)

102 My youngest daughter is allergic to poison ivy but not insect bites.

I'm the opposite. Poison ivy doesn't affect me, but I swell up if a mosquito looks at me sideways.
Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:36 PM (YlYJ

Mosquitos don't bother me, but if I get within 20 feet of poison ivy, I'll be daubing calamine for the next week. Love the *fabulous pink* color of calamine (HATE IT, BUT DAMN IF IT DOESN'T WORK).

My other weakness CHIGGERS (redbugs)!

-SLV

Posted by: Shy Lurking Voter at August 23, 2026 03:40 PM (7kJyR)

103 101 #34 was napha also known as white gas?

Posted by: From about That Time at August 23, 2026 03:39 PM (sl73Y)

Dat's Rayciiist!!

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:40 PM (l3cgK)

104 Worst-est / 'Most Embarrassing' bite I've had was a Brown Recluse bite … on the right ass-cheek. Yeah. Try taking a pic of that with your iPhone in the right hand and a mirror reflecting what's in the wall mirror to line up the shot correctly. When I finally went to the walk-in clinic, the Indian 'tech' just started laughing … so much for 'medical care', eh?

Posted by: Dr_No at August 23, 2026 03:41 PM (ayRl+)

105 Your daughter is a bug repellent?
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:39 PM (l3cgK)
___

lol, she actually made me a jar of concentrate, that I dilute in some water in a spray bottle.

It works very well keeping flies, fleas, ticks, mosquitoes and other bugs away.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:41 PM (YlYJ8)

106 Progressive. Their policy owner rammed my truck. In spite of police report, eye witness, they refused to settle for the damage. 'Sue the owner' they said. I'm not getting into that.

Posted by: Mike Hammer
Send info to your state insurance commissioner. Let Progressive know that.

Posted by: free tibet at August 23, 2026 03:44 PM (iNp3L)

107 > But since everyone wants quick shade, they planted what are essentially weed species.

This is about us, isn't it?

Posted by: Tulip Poplars at August 23, 2026 03:45 PM (2Ez/1)

108 Pair of walkie-talkies, plus helper. Or use cell phones: "call me when the fan stops".

Besides, isn't that the back side of a Yugo radio?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 23, 2026 03:45 PM (1z8ji)

109 104 Worst-est / 'Most Embarrassing' bite I've had was a Brown Recluse bite … on the right ass-cheek. Yeah. Try taking a pic of that with your iPhone in the right hand and a mirror reflecting what's in the wall mirror to line up the shot correctly. When I finally went to the walk-in clinic, the Indian 'tech' just started laughing … so much for 'medical care', eh?

Posted by: Dr_No at August 23, 2026 03:41 PM (ayRl+)

Had a date palm front thorn go through a welding glove, through my finger, and get stopped by the other side of the welding glove.
In the end, I took a pair of pliers, pulled out the damn thorn, pulled my hand out. Yup, all the way through the joint of the finger, but amazingly no bleeding. Cleaned it well, got a tetanus shot.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:45 PM (l3cgK)

110 #34 was naptha also known as white gas?
----
Pretty much. Coleman stoves and lanterns operate just fine on automotive gasoline, there is no need or desire to use high octane premium. Eventually after long use the generator will clog with tar and carbon. Even those can be cleaned. The chief advantage to Naptha is for emergency or stand-by use. It doesn't spoil. Neat stuff.

The emergency responders used to keep Coleman fuel in the gas tank for "Jaws of Life" use, because of this reason. It isn't going to work in a high compression 4 stroke engine. I mixed up a gallon of Coleman fuel and 2-stroke oil for the LawnBoy a couple times back in the day when I ran out of car gas. It ran fine, got the job done. I wouldn't do it now, not at 17 bucks a gallon.

Posted by: Common Tater at August 23, 2026 03:46 PM (3ErUN)

111 @ 105 Your daughter is a bug repellent?
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:39 PM (l3cgK) ___ lol, she actually made me a jar of concentrate, that I dilute in some water in a spray bottle. It works very well keeping flies, fleas, ticks, mosquitoes and other bugs away.
Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:41 PM (YlYJ
______________________________________

Bug spray? Rinse out an empty Clorox bathroom cleaner spray bottle. Fill it with 1/2 and 1/2 water and 91% isopropyl alcohol. It sprays out in a large cloud of tiny droplets and freezes the little bastards mid-flight. Works great on flies, too …

Posted by: Dr_No at August 23, 2026 03:47 PM (ayRl+)

112 > This week's FWP.

Largest branch from neighbor's 160 year-old oak tree fell down during a storm on my garage. (I don't think two Morons could join hands around the trunk.)

Decking and obsolete clay tiles destroyed in droves. Hip rafter also shattered.
--------------
A massive tree fell behind our daughter's house (a mobile home) this past March when a tornado (EF-1) passed over it. Most of the damage was cosmetic, but there were two holes punched in the roof from branches. And much of the siding was pitted by debris hitting it, two busted windows and of course a new roof.

$34,875 I still have the invoice. It's my house, they just live there.

Insurance covered all but the deductible.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 23, 2026 03:48 PM (2Cry5)

113 Key to working the garden in this heat is plenty of ice water and 15 minutes in the sun, followed by a cold beer.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 23, 2026 03:48 PM (3Ope8)

114
Golden Willow trees are a pain.

Last owner planted several in the backyard. They don't provide shade and privacy. All they do is shed branches.

Posted by: four seasons at August 23, 2026 03:49 PM (/QHx4)

115 Going to the walk-in clinic nowadays feels like you're paying someone $40 to Google your symptoms.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at August 23, 2026 03:50 PM (2Ez/1)

116 An insurance policy is no more than a license to argue with the insurance company. YMMV.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 23, 2026 03:50 PM (XeU6L)

117 MULBERRY TREES!!!!!
Branches spread and drop everywhere!
Birds eat the berries, spread and DROP everywhere!

-SLV

Posted by: Shy Lurking Voter at August 23, 2026 03:51 PM (7kJyR)

118 Leaded-gasoline was removed from automobile use about 1985, that stuff was no good for stoves or lanterns in particular.

I think Chevron or somebody like that offered Lead-free gasoline all along. It wasn't really until the 1950s that it became a think, known as Ethyl, because engines became larger and more powerful, higher compression, and so a better octane was needed. Aircraft or aviation gasoline was a huge deal during the War, because there was a limited amount that could be extracted from a barrel of crude using the refining processes of the day. That's where "cracking" and similar came into the fore. The ability to get more or different refinery products from a barrel of crude than previously possible.

Posted by: Common Tater at August 23, 2026 03:51 PM (3ErUN)

119 You know you need the stair work to for it.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 23, 2026 03:20 PM (UdHDF)

I AM NOT FAT!

I am simply short for my weight!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 23, 2026 03:52 PM (k5CNB)

120
Insurance covered all but the deductible.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 23, 2026 03:48 PM (2Cry5)

That's because they couldn't argue with God about it.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:53 PM (l3cgK)

121 Going to the walk-in clinic nowadays feels like you're paying someone $40 to Google your symptoms.
Posted by: Quarter Twenty
---------

Perhaps. A friend while recently visiting the doc, the doc simply recorded their conversation, the report/diagnosis was provided by AI.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 23, 2026 03:54 PM (XeU6L)

122 $34,875 I still have the invoice. It's my house, they just live there.

Insurance covered all but the deductible.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 23, 2026 03:48 PM

That is about what I am expecting.

Only problem, I have recently been shaking my sofa quite a bit for loose change to make the family budget.

Pretty sure there is NOT $35,000 left in that old sofa if insurance isn't going to pay.

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at August 23, 2026 03:54 PM (HlyYF)

123 117 MULBERRY TREES!!!!!
Branches spread and drop everywhere!
Birds eat the berries, spread and DROP everywhere!

-SLV

Posted by: Shy Lurking Voter at August 23, 2026 03:51 PM (7kJyR)

this is true. Fortunately the birds in my neighborhood don't do that to the blackberries...instead, they pick at them where they are, like they do to the guavas...then there are the damnable crows, crushing my nuts on my roof...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:55 PM (l3cgK)

124 I had a huge dead branch taken off of a sugar maple and cut into sections for the fireplace. It's real bitch splitting sugar maple.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at August 23, 2026 03:55 PM (XvL8K)

125 Speaking of beer, isn't it almost beverage time?

Posted by: Skip at August 23, 2026 03:56 PM (Ia/+0)

126 then there are the damnable crows, crushing my nuts on my roof...
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:55 PM (l3cgK)

OUCH!!!! Sounds painful!!!

-SLV

Posted by: Shy Lurking Voter at August 23, 2026 03:56 PM (7kJyR)

127 125 Speaking of beer, isn't it almost beverage time?

Posted by: Skip at August 23, 2026 03:56 PM (Ia/+0)

Somewhere in the world, it's beer time...
But I don't drink, so not for me.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:58 PM (l3cgK)

128 124 I had a huge dead branch taken off of a sugar maple and cut into sections for the fireplace. It's real bitch splitting sugar maple.
Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at August 23, 2026 03:55 PM (XvL8K)

I learned something when I was in Alaska, ANY wood will split (MUCH) easier after it has frozen once.

-SLV

Posted by: Shy Lurking Voter at August 23, 2026 03:58 PM (7kJyR)

129 Bug spray? Rinse out an empty Clorox bathroom cleaner spray bottle. Fill it with 1/2 and 1/2 water and 91% isopropyl alcohol. It sprays out in a large cloud of tiny droplets and freezes the little bastards mid-flight. Works great on flies, too …
Posted by: Dr_No at August 23, 2026 03:47 PM (ayRl+)
___

I use that to keep the flies at bay on the porch.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at August 23, 2026 03:59 PM (YlYJ8)

130 As an aside, working out the wiring for a circuit with two-way switches. I had to draw it out. It is essentally an Exclusive Nor gate.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 23, 2026 02:57 PM (XeU6L)

"Electrician speak" is a pet peeve of mine. A "three-way" switch has only two positions, toggle up, or toggle down. There is no "third way", Mussolini notwithstanding. In the real world, they are known as "single pole, double-throw" switches. In the real world, such switches may have a center "off" position, but not necessarily. Household wiring switches never have that option, AFAIK. And a "4-way" switch is just a double-pole, double throw switch, in which the toggle has only two positions.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 23, 2026 03:59 PM (1z8ji)

131 Another reason to blame and hate Trump—naphtha by the shipload load is being sent to VZ for their heavy crude processing.
Posted by: Community Notes at August 23, 2026 03:03 PM (a4flb)

And it comes right back in the crude shipped from VZ, and is recovered at the refinery. It is a circular trade.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 23, 2026 04:01 PM (1z8ji)

132 Get cleaned up and upstairs.
FOOD NOOD

Posted by: Skip at August 23, 2026 04:01 PM (Ia/+0)

133 I have large fig bush in the back, next to the pond. Between the squirrels, jays, mockingbird birds and rats, I never get more than a handful for myself.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 23, 2026 04:02 PM (3Ope8)

134 Cut down a monster holly ~~bush~~ tree this afternoon. I mean a 20' monster. The wood is soft enough to handle easily but wow, is it heavy. Of course the damn leaves want to poke the shit out of you.

Posted by: Tonypete at August 23, 2026 04:02 PM (he2p7)

135 How do you know the tree is 160 years old?
Posted by: I gotta ask at August 23, 2026 03:24 PM (2Ez/1)

Taylor Lorenz made a diary entry when she planted it.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 23, 2026 04:04 PM (1z8ji)

136 > Insurance covered all but the deductible.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 23, 2026 03:48 PM (2Cry5)

That's because they couldn't argue with God about it.
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at August 23, 2026 03:53 PM (l3cgK)
----------
True. But there was widespread damage from that storm. Easily 10 - 20 million. Whole farms had every structure and outbuilding wiped out. We were a drop in the proverbial bucket.

Homeowner's insurance is higher now, of course. But not outrageously so.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 23, 2026 04:07 PM (2Cry5)

137 I feel for you figuring out the circuit breakers. A owner was stupid, so my breakers had helpful labels like "radio" and "diner corner". I generally turn on lights and hit breakers until the right one goes off.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at August 23, 2026 04:09 PM (xR1cG)

138 I learned something when I was in Alaska, ANY wood will split (MUCH) easier after it has frozen once.

-SLV

Posted by: Shy Lurking Voter at August 23, 2026 03:58 PM

I like to split it when it still has frost on it.

At that point, the round is actually trying to expand (and wants to split).

Also, I can swing a splitting maul a lot more times in the cold wearing a thin flannel shirt than I can swing it when it is hot outside!

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at August 23, 2026 04:34 PM (HlyYF)

139 My garage has the screw in type fuses, but I've saved a bundle using pennies instead.

Posted by: Thrifty Ted at August 23, 2026 04:35 PM (JM9I6)

140 Turn off the main breaker, replace the controller, then turn it back on, viola!

Posted by: Strung Out at August 23, 2026 04:38 PM (JM9I6)

141 Also, I can swing a splitting maul a lot more times in the cold wearing a thin flannel shirt than I can swing it when it is hot outside!
Posted by: Pillage Idiot

Who knew PI was a lumberjack?

Posted by: And He's OK! at August 23, 2026 04:40 PM (JM9I6)

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