Hollywood: Shit or Garbage?

The Odyssey is every bit as woke and gay as we were fearing.

First of all, it's based on a revisionist translation of Homer's text, by a radical feminist who used the tale to critique masculinity, "the patriarchy," and to center female voices.

You know, like the 3,000 year old war and adventure tale The Odyssey was always meant to be.

Jon Root
@JonnyRoot_
3h
Christopher Nolan's The Odyssey movie was doomed from the start...
It's rumored that the screenplay is based on a woke, feminist retelling of the story by Emily Wilson*
1. The language is dumbed down (modernized)
2. It downplays masculinity & male hierarchy.
3. It shames violence/war
4. Odysseus is emasculated & less of an inspirational hero. He's more "complicated" (vulnerable, arrogant, manipulative)
5. Woman are made more prominent & impactful at the expense of male characters.
This retelling infuses modern, liberal ideology into the story, turning the epic into political propaganda.
This movie will no doubt have elements of identity politics throughout.
*Nolan has mentioned Wilson's version in interviews.

This is why Odysseus' son says "My dad is coming home," too. She translates ancient Greek for (say it with me) The Modern Audience.

Nolan is not using the standard cinematic music for epics, the orchestral score, saying that the orchestra did not exist in ancient Greece and so the movie shouldn't have an orchestral score.

DiscussingFilm
@DiscussingFilm
May 12
Christopher Nolan instructed Ludwig Göransson not to use an orchestra for 'THE ODYSSEY' score.
"It's not like the orchestra existed back then. It was a challenge and also an opening to try to make something unique."

So, you may think: Oh he's using period-accurate music for the film.* He just wants to make the most period-accurate epic of ancient mythic Greece ever made.

But then... Why this?

Christopher Nolan says he cast rapper Travis Scott in #TheOdyssey as a “nod“ to the tradition of oral poetry:

“I cast him because I wanted to nod towards the idea that this story has been handed down as oral poetry, which is analogous to rap.” (via Time)… pic.twitter.com/gvgwo20YHC
— Variety (@Variety) May 12, 2026

He plays "a bard." You know, those famous African bards of ancient Greece.

Did they have rap in ancient mythic Greece?

Two of his beancounting casting choices -- complying with the Academy's demand for precise levels of overrepresentation of actors from Marginalized Groups in any movie in order to be eligible for an Oscar -- are now confirmed.

Variety:

The all-star cast is rounded out by Tom Holland as Telemachus, Robert Pattinson as Antinous, Lupita Nyong'o as Helen of Troy, Zendaya as Athena, Charlize Theron as Calypso, Jon Bernthal as Menelaus, and Benny Safdie as Agamemnon.

Note that Nolan is selling his race-swap-crazy feminist take on The Odyssey as hyper-accurate.

Anyone who's been following Nolan's career knows the British filmmaker is painstaking when it comes to accuracy. On "Interstellar," he hired a team of scientists to get the physics to be as accurate as possible. He took a similar approach to "The Odyssey."
"For 'Interstellar,' you're looking at, 'What is the best speculation of the future?' When you're looking at the ancient past, it's actually the same thing," Nolan said. "'What is the best speculation and how can I use that to create a world?'"
He added, "Hopefully they'll enjoy the film, even if they don't agree with everything. We had a lot of scientists complain about 'Interstellar.' But you just don't want people to think that you took it on frivolously."

I care less about the race-swap of Athena. She's a "goddess" and I guess can take whatever form she likes. I don't see much wisdom in Zendaya's blank eyes, though.

But Lupito Nyong'o as Helen of Troy?

Helen of Troy was born in... Sparta.

Does Lupito Nyong'o have that classic Spartan look?

Is this the most accurate speculation about what the ancient Greek world looked like?

Lupita Nyong’o will play both Helen of Troy and her sister, Clytemnestra, in Christopher Nolan’s ‘THE ODYSSEY.’

(https://t.co/wG33R7UAQs) pic.twitter.com/Mn8e5sG1RA
— Pop Base (@PopBase) May 12, 2026

So he ostentatiously avoids orchestral score for the sake of "accuracy" and "realism and immersion," and then relocates Sparta to sub-Saharan Africa?

Why?

And of course it's now essentially confirmed that Achilles, greatest warrior in Greek legend, the ideal of hypermasculinity, will be played by Ellen "Elliot" Page because of course, this is a realistic and immersive retelling of the Odyssey which gets all the details right.

The claim he'll make is that she (and she is a she, even if she did lop off her tits) is playing the shade of Achilles, bedraggled and enfeebled in Hell, but... come on, Hell does not change your sex in any myth or religiion. Give me a break, this is casting to fulfill the Academy's race/gay/trans beancounting.

Industry-shill captured paper Variety is shocked and horrified that Elon Musk said two accurate things about the casting in this woke piece of shit:

Elon Musk is bashing Christopher Nolan for #TheOdyssey casting, alleging the director cast Lupita Nyong’o as Helen of Troy because he “wants the awards.”

In additional X posts, Musk re-tweeted posts that mocked Elliot Page’s masculinity and claimed that Nolan was stomping all… pic.twitter.com/rhMoaZNCXM
— Variety (@Variety) May 13, 2026

Which one of those statements by Musk is a lie, Variety? Do you certify, with all of your "journalistic" authority, that Lupito Nyong'o is an accurate depiction of a Spartan woman so beautiful that she launched a thousand ships to re-take her, or that Ellen "Elliot" Page is a good representation of idealized Greek Heroic masculinity?

Or that Nolan is doing this to comport with Academy racial and sexual bean-counting?

FUUUUUUUCK this guy and FUUUUUUUCK this movie.

I'll watch Troy again. Sean Bean is my Odysseus.

* The first time I heard "well they didn't have orchestral music back then either" was from the writer/director of A Knight's Tale, explaining why it's no big deal that his 14th-century jousting movie contained music by David Bowie and Queen. It's no more anachronistic, he argued, that a medieval-set film should feature "Low Rider" and "We Will Rock You" than it would to feature an orchestral score.

I mean... okay whatever that was a good movie and those music inclusions were fun so I'll let it stand.

Posted by: Disinformation Expert Ace at 04:33 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Yeet!

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 13, 2026 04:33 PM (xSO/X)

2 Hiya ace. Hope you are well. Hollyweird needs to burn in hell.

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 13, 2026 04:34 PM (xSO/X)

3 Embrace the power of And

Posted by: Skip at May 13, 2026 04:34 PM (Ia/+0)

4 Nolan has the smuggest face that ever smugged

Posted by: Greenland Polar Bears at May 13, 2026 04:35 PM (j+aD2)

5 Imma cut a bitch.
-- Zombie Homer

Posted by: Bulg at May 13, 2026 04:35 PM (77rzZ)

6 She doesn't look Greek to me
Nice looking woman, just not very European

Posted by: Skip at May 13, 2026 04:36 PM (Ia/+0)

7 He would rather get awards than profits for the investors.

Posted by: no one of any consequense at May 13, 2026 04:36 PM (qFwJc)

8 also Mr Authenticity totally went wild with the military garb - completely anachronistic

why pretend to care about accuracy, Chris?

Posted by: Greenland Polar Bears at May 13, 2026 04:36 PM (j+aD2)

9 I'll watch Troy again. Sean Bean is my Odysseus.

They did Menelaus so dirty in that movie and I hate them for it.

Posted by: FeatherBlade at May 13, 2026 04:36 PM (vJrRc)

10 I have a theory on what Nolan is doing with The Odyssey.

I don't know if anyone saw it, but there was an in-theater only teaser last Christmas. In it, Menelaus invites tales of Odysseus to be told.

We've also found out that Travis Scott is in the film, and the one photo of him from the movie is him obviously in Ithaca.

The Odyssey was also told by Homer orally, meaning it's part of the oral tradition.

So...the story of Odysseus is going to be told by the people in Ithaca as they wait for Penelope to tell them who she's going to marry. And Scott will tell of the end of the Trojan War when Helen was there.

And because Scott is black, his telling of Helen will be black.

If that's the case, I think it's a clever way to get in diversity hires and actually make it make sense.

======

I said this last thread, but I think the stunt casting is going to be less obnoxious in the film than feared.

But, no one's seen it. I could be all wrong. So who knows?

It's gonna break a billion dollars at the box office no matter what.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at May 13, 2026 04:36 PM (rJ5No)

11 Zendaya!

Actually I liked her in K.C. Undercover where she played a girl from a family of spies. Cute show.

Don't forget Ellen Page....I thought she's in this too. You need a tranny to really get the Oscar buzz going.

Posted by: Stateless - He ain't heavy, he's my dog at May 13, 2026 04:37 PM (Sco7b)

12 There is a really cool version if The Illiad on YouTube sung in Greek as it would have been performed.

Posted by: steevy at May 13, 2026 04:37 PM (YwEeS)

13 The new Tolkien rip off will be the same

Posted by: Skip at May 13, 2026 04:37 PM (Ia/+0)

14 She doesn't look Greek to me
Nice looking woman, just not very European
Posted by: Skip at May 13, 2026 04:36 PM (Ia/+0)

Now they will be sued by Greece for cultural crimes.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 04:37 PM (8avO+)

15 Zzzzz.

Hollywood is dead, except for chomos.

F them in they ear.

Posted by: Comrade Flounder, Disinformation Demon at May 13, 2026 04:37 PM (D71P7)

16 I read most of the content...really..

It's just so easy to pass by Ellen Page and not notice her.

Posted by: Stateless - He ain't heavy, he's my dog at May 13, 2026 04:38 PM (Sco7b)

17 300 is a more accurate Greek epic than this catastrophe.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at May 13, 2026 04:39 PM (gnNyN)

18 “I cast him because I wanted to nod towards the idea that this story has been handed down as oral poetry, which is analogous to rap.”

If you are having to defend casting decisions on your multi million dollar movie flop before the movie comes out you have a problem.

Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at May 13, 2026 04:39 PM (0N4FZ)

19 What am I, chopped liver??? When will it be MY turn?!?

Posted by: Dylan Mulvaney, veteran beverage spokesmodel at May 13, 2026 04:39 PM (U/s6V)

20 This is just sad, pathetic and gay.

Lame left town.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at May 13, 2026 04:39 PM (zZu0s)

21 Actually I liked her in K.C. Undercover where she played a girl from a family of spies. Cute show.

Don't forget Ellen Page....I thought she's in this too. You need a tranny to really get the Oscar buzz going.
Posted by: Stateless - He ain't heavy, he's my dog at May 13, 2026 04:37 PM (Sco7b)

I suppose with would need god-touched armor and weapons for anyone to buy that she has won duels against Hector.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 04:40 PM (8avO+)

22 "Odysseus is emasculated & less of an inspirational hero."

So this is going be pretty much the same film as Ridley Scott's "Napoleon the Cuckhold."

Posted by: Alteria Pilgram - My President has convictions at May 13, 2026 04:40 PM (glnUu)

23 Afternoon, all,

I now officially have zero interest in this movie.

Charlize Theron as Helen (though she's a bit old for the role), or as goddess Athena or Aphrodite? Sure. A Kenyan or whatever she is? NO.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at May 13, 2026 04:40 PM (wzUl9)

24 Ought to be renamed The Odioussey

Posted by: Bulg at May 13, 2026 04:40 PM (77rzZ)

25 The new Tolkien rip off will be the same
Posted by: Skip at May 13, 2026 04:37 PM (Ia/+0)
----
Making a Tolkien epic even lamer and gayer than Amazon's Rings of Power is a tough challenge, but I'm sure what's-his-name (Stephen Colbert?) is up to the task.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at May 13, 2026 04:40 PM (gnNyN)

26 17 300 is a more accurate Greek epic than this catastrophe.
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at May 13, 2026 04:39 PM (gnNyN)

Shut up you- back to your crunches!

Bryan Singer will be by in 15 with the baby oil.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (zZu0s)

27 I had to look up Lupito Nyong'o's photo, because I have no idea who she is. And after looking at her, I still don't.

She is a pleasant looking woman, but there are many better looking actresses available, and even if Nolan was fixated on Helen being black (which he obviously was) there are many better looking black actresses.

Maybe she launched a drone flown by a 12-year-old boy while she was skinny-dipping in her backyard pool. But a thousand ships? Nope.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (iERP6)

28 Hollywood has become so lazy they don’t even bother taking original stories and developing them.

Creativity is dead.

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (chFFn)

29 A shame because I always felt like Nolan seemed like he might at the very least be "not liberal".

His take on Batman seemed to have a center-right message of corrupt politicians turning a blind eye to crime and skewering Occupy Wall Street type movements as inherently evil.

Posted by: Leupold at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (eIzlH)

30 MATT DAMON!

Posted by: MATT DAMON! at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (1wjle)

31 “I cast him because I wanted to nod towards the idea that this story has been handed down as oral poetry, which is analogous to rap.”

If you are having to defend casting decisions on your multi million dollar movie flop before the movie comes out you have a problem.
Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at May 13, 2026 04:39 PM (0N4FZ)

analogous hardly means 'absolutely nothing like' Ridley.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (8avO+)

32 Nolan and his tedious and pedantic movies are absurdly overrated because of the dearth of talent in Hollywood.

Posted by: Field Marshal Zhukov at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (wBaIH)

33 7 He would rather get awards than profits for the investors.
Posted by: no one of any consequense at May 13, 2026 04:36 PM (qFwJc)

Funny enough, he won't win b/c Dune 3 probably will. So, he emasculated himself for...nothing...just the chance for the nomination (which you can't receive without a DEI enough cast)...

Posted by: Nova Local at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (tOcjL)

34 So this is going be pretty much the same film as Ridley Scott's "Napoleon the Cuckhold."
Posted by: Alteria Pilgram - My President has convictions at May 13, 2026 04:40 PM (glnUu)

Thats a good comparison.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (zZu0s)

35 f*** doug lymon for making MATT DAMON! an action hero

Posted by: ace at May 13, 2026 04:42 PM (1wjle)

36 It's garbage.

Posted by: Guy who always says "It's garbage" at May 13, 2026 04:42 PM (vFG9F)

37 I like big Greeks and I don't lie.

Posted by: Rappin' Ho Mer at May 13, 2026 04:42 PM (Cqx++)

38 Making a Tolkien epic even lamer and gayer than Amazon's Rings of Power is a tough challenge, but I'm sure what's-his-name (Stephen Colbert?) is up to the task.
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel

Andy Serkis the guy that made animal farm anti-capitalist gets the first crack.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 13, 2026 04:42 PM (YZ0Fo)

39 My notion in 23 that this Lupita lady is Kenyan? Half right. "Lupita Nyong'o is a Kenyan-Mexican actress[.]"

Hideous distortion of one of the central myths of our culture.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at May 13, 2026 04:42 PM (wzUl9)

40 It's gonna break a billion dollars at the box office no matter what.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at May 13, 2026 04:36 PM (rJ5No)

But it won't if it gets rejected. Nolan hasn't really had a rejected film...Spielberg didn't either...til he did.

This may be Nolan's reject...

Posted by: Nova Local at May 13, 2026 04:42 PM (tOcjL)

41 >>>A shame because I always felt like Nolan seemed like he might at the very least be "not liberal".

His take on Batman seemed to have a center-right message of corrupt politicians turning a blind eye to crime and skewering Occupy Wall Street type movements as inherently evil.

yeah he's been tagged as possibly "cryptoconservative." I guess this is his way of signalling he's part of the communist monoculture.

Posted by: ace at May 13, 2026 04:43 PM (1wjle)

42 Hollyweird needs to burn in hell.
Posted by: nurse ratched

Way to give away my re-election campaign slogan.

Posted by: Karen Bass at May 13, 2026 04:43 PM (ZgXGt)

43 Yeah...I think I see why Hollyweird doesn't like Jews now...it's because they reined in feldercarb like this in the old days in favor of things audiences would pay money to watch. Y'know. Like they were tryin' to run a business here.

Kinda obvious when you think about it.

Posted by: Brother Tim (102mm/W59), Keeper of the Tim Continuum at May 13, 2026 04:44 PM (OUMaO)

44 40
But it won't if it gets rejected. Nolan hasn't really had a rejected film...Spielberg didn't either...til he did.

This may be Nolan's reject...
Posted by: Nova Local at May 13, 2026 04:42 PM

====

Tracking is sky high and history shows the larger public doesn't give a shit about stuff like this.

Im sure when it opens big everyone will just say fake numbers, though.

Posted by: TJM's phone at May 13, 2026 04:44 PM (rJ5No)

45 Hell does not change your sex in any myth or religiion.
--
Can confirm

Posted by: Kratos, frequent participant in the afterlives at May 13, 2026 04:44 PM (vSvIl)

46 Too many see its woke BS they won't go

Posted by: Skip at May 13, 2026 04:44 PM (Ia/+0)

47 So this is going be pretty much the same film as Ridley Scott's "Napoleon the Cuckhold."
Posted by: Alteria Pilgram - My President has convictions at May 13, 2026 04:40 PM (glnUu)

Thats a good comparison.
Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (zZu0s)

I was watching a takedown of it just yesterday and the fortifications around Toulon looked a lot more like the Walls of Troy than anything build in a Gunpowder age. Real Nappy could have blown those down with artillery in a snap.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 04:44 PM (8avO+)

48 I don't mind the race confusion stuff so much -- I mean, if someone is a good actor then let them play whatever role they are good at.

I don't know if this ngyo'b,!e8ya person is a good actor, and that name shit is annoying, but, whatever.

That Page person should be in an fucking mental institution and not acting in any role.

But my main problem with this modern stuff is not the actors, but the acting. The gay, the trans, the feminine men, the black invented everything, blah blah blah. someone should do an "authentic historic black movie" of a bunch of stone age fools banging on rocks with sticks..

Posted by: bob (moron inbobnitus) at May 13, 2026 04:45 PM (HBms5)

49 Will they cast an acutal one eyed actor as Polyphemus?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 13, 2026 04:45 PM (Cqx++)

50 They're gonna "Hamilton" everything, aren't they.

Posted by: Kareem of Wheat at May 13, 2026 04:45 PM (Cjger)

51 If does not have a Gay Sex Scenes with Transgenders, then I am not wasting my time to view it....

Posted by: Franklin Stein at May 13, 2026 04:46 PM (5l41Z)

52 “I don't see much wisdom in Zendaya's blank eyes, though.”

Maybe she’s not squinting enough.

Posted by: Clay at May 13, 2026 04:46 PM (meATp)

53 First of all, it's based on a revisionist translation of Homer's text

Mmmmmmmmm, beer.

Posted by: rickb223 at May 13, 2026 04:46 PM (MwdeY)

54 I was never gonna see this anyway.

1. I think the Odyssey is boring.

2. I think Nolan is overrated.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 13, 2026 04:46 PM (GcWsw)

55 Trojans can't read. Do most people thumb type on touchscreens?

Posted by: Boss Moss at May 13, 2026 04:46 PM (+Vmst)

56 I'll say it again, with Ellen Page as Achilles

Sorry Hector, Achilles can't fight today his penis fell off

Posted by: Smell the Glove at May 13, 2026 04:46 PM (gu0hJ)

57 BOOOOOOOONG

Posted by: That sound from Inception at May 13, 2026 04:46 PM (U/s6V)

58 I don't mind the race confusion stuff so much -- I mean, if someone is a good actor then let them play whatever role they are good at.

When a people are being erased from their own culture, vile things are afoot.

Posted by: Brother Tim (102mm/W59), Keeper of the Tim Continuum at May 13, 2026 04:46 PM (OUMaO)

59
I don't know if this ngyo'b,!e8ya person is a good actor

Hey, that's my banking password!

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (Cqx++)

60 A box of paper clips is smarter than Christopher Nolan.

Posted by: dantesed at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (Oy/m2)

61 >>>48 I don't mind the race confusion stuff so much -- I mean, if someone is a good actor then let them play whatever role they are good at.

I've seen her in a few things and was never impressed.

Posted by: ace at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (1wjle)

62 Will they cast an acutal one eyed actor as Polyphemus?
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 13, 2026 04:45 PM (Cqx++)

What woman will be on the voyage to come up with the clever ideas Odysseus has? Can't be a man.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (8avO+)

63 You want the hottest white actress available to play Helen of Troy. Or at least the prettiest -- remember she had "the face that launched a thousand ships," not "the boobs that launched a thousand ships."

But, I'm guessin' ol' Helen had a splendiferous rack as well. So prettiest face and biggest boobs available.

Posted by: Bulg at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (77rzZ)

64 "period-accurate music for the film"

Pan flutes played by satyrs with giant erections.

Posted by: fd at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (vFG9F)

65 His take on Batman seemed to have a center-right message of corrupt politicians turning a blind eye to crime and skewering Occupy Wall Street type movements as inherently evil.

yeah he's been tagged as possibly "cryptoconservative." I guess this is his way of signalling he's part of the communist monoculture.

Posted by: ace at May 13, 2026 04:43 PM (1wjle)

Or he doesn't want to be disinvited from the cocktail parties. He heard about Dunkirk being "too white" from his peers, and couldn't live with it again. He didn't want to be rejected from the industry.

So, I have lost respect for him...

Posted by: Nova Local at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (tOcjL)

66 I don't know if this ngyo'b,!e8ya person is a good actor

Hey, that's my banking password!

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr.

Upgraded from "12345", didja...

Posted by: Brother Tim (102mm/W59), Keeper of the Tim Continuum at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (OUMaO)

67 It's gonna break a billion dollars at the box office no matter what.
-
This year?

I wouldn't count on it.

Big opening weekend maybe, but then word of mouth takes over and it can't hide behind Nolan's reputation.

Posted by: Methos at May 13, 2026 04:48 PM (vSvIl)

68 you know, it looks like Neil Gaiman is actually innocent of the perv stuff

they can get back to making Anansi Boys and there will be plenty of fantastic diverse roles in that!

I'm hopeful this WILL happen. the chick who went after him was utterly full of it and her cases have all been dismissed. (the other ones were just glommers-onners)

Posted by: Greenland Polar Bears at May 13, 2026 04:48 PM (j+aD2)

69 Next movie Remake will be of the World War 11 Classic....

"Battle of the Crotch Bulge" starring Gav Newsome.

Posted by: Franklin Stein at May 13, 2026 04:48 PM (5l41Z)

70 The race swaps don't really bother me (although annoying) it's a fictional world and its not like everyone is Greek for accuracy.

It would be the feminist nonsense. The Mary Sue stuff bothers me the most maybe of any Hollywood trope. Always needs to make the female "hero" absurdly overpowered, way smarter, cooler, etc than their male counterparts.

Posted by: Leupold at May 13, 2026 04:48 PM (eIzlH)

71 Hollywood: Shit or Garbage?
—Disinformation Expert Ace
---
The answer is Yes.

Posted by: Magic 8-Ball at May 13, 2026 04:48 PM (Fi81e)

72 Troy wasn't great but it was watchable. Pitt was good as was Brian Cox. Always liked Wolfgang Peterson as a director . Triy was a solid attempt at an epic

Posted by: Smell the Glove at May 13, 2026 04:49 PM (gu0hJ)

73 I'll rewatch "O Brother Where Art Thou", the best and most accurate telling of the Odyssey.

Posted by: Little Larry Sellers at May 13, 2026 04:49 PM (RW1OD)

74 You know, they didn't have movies back then either.

Posted by: fd at May 13, 2026 04:49 PM (vFG9F)

75 I was never gonna see this anyway.

1. I think the Odyssey is boring.

2. I think Nolan is overrated.
Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 13, 2026 04:46 PM (GcWsw)

I remember a cartoon saying that the Odyssey is half tales you tell your buddies about the gals you screwed and half is what you tell your wife about why you were late getting back home.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 04:49 PM (8avO+)

76 anyway I prefer the Iliad so I think I'll rewatch Troy, which was a good film. if I wanted to watch the Odyssey the Return is good. I don't need this.

Posted by: Greenland Polar Bears at May 13, 2026 04:49 PM (j+aD2)

77 Upgraded from "12345", didja...
Posted by: Brother Tim (102mm/W59), Keeper of the Tim Continuum at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (OUMaO)

Hey, that's MY password!

Posted by: John Podesta at May 13, 2026 04:49 PM (U/s6V)

78 Zendaya as Athena
......

Was Karen Bass unavailable?

Posted by: wth at May 13, 2026 04:49 PM (UjdFS)

79
Odysseus is the smartest, wisest, craftiest of the Greeks. And he's being played by....

*retard voice*

MAAAATT DAMON!

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at May 13, 2026 04:50 PM (y9nCu)

80 If you take a shit in a garbage can, which is it? Shit or garbage? I guess only the trashman knows.

Posted by: Ex Rex Reeder at May 13, 2026 04:50 PM (QaH55)

81 I remember a cartoon saying that the Odyssey is half tales you tell your buddies about the gals you screwed and half is what you tell your wife about why you were late getting back home.

lol that's perfect!

oh and yes, O Brother is a great version, we didn't need Nolan's take

Posted by: Greenland Polar Bears at May 13, 2026 04:50 PM (j+aD2)

82 The Epitaph of Sekeilos had better be in there:

https://youtu.be/IqQwbeVgkJA

Posted by: pookysgirl loves the oldest melody in the world at May 13, 2026 04:50 PM (Wt5PA)

83
Might as well have Pauly Shore or Pedro Pascal play Achilles.

Posted by: YIKES! at May 13, 2026 04:50 PM (OgWfa)

84 Greece should ban this shitshow. As the rest of normal people.

Posted by: runner at May 13, 2026 04:50 PM (GD0B3)

85 Or he doesn't want to be disinvited from the cocktail parties. He heard about Dunkirk being "too white" from his peers, and couldn't live with it again. He didn't want to be rejected from the industry.

So, I have lost respect for him...
Posted by: Nova Local at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (tOcjL)

They could have just moved the beach from Dunkirk to one in Sierra Leone no problem.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 04:50 PM (8avO+)

86 The best Oddessy was the Coen Bros. version. They have more talent in their little finger than Nolan has in his body. Even with his over coat on. (Classical Laurel & Hardy reference)

Posted by: Field Marshal Zhukov at May 13, 2026 04:50 PM (wBaIH)

87
Don't forget Ellen Page....I thought she's in this too. You need a tranny to really get the Oscar buzz going.
Posted by: Stateless

=============

Go back over the post. Ellen is now Elliot.

Posted by: Blonde Mortixtl at May 13, 2026 04:50 PM (XJ22o)

88 Why would they go to war over an ugly bitch?

Posted by: Boss Moss at May 13, 2026 04:50 PM (+Vmst)

89 so sick of:

Zendaya

Pedro Pascal

Timothy Chalomet

That massive chick from Lasso or GoT, either one

Posted by: Greenland Polar Bears at May 13, 2026 04:50 PM (j+aD2)

90 Just remember, them Greek homos stole algebra from us.

Posted by: Big Al S. at May 13, 2026 04:51 PM (0sNs1)

91 I heard the next Playboy XXXL centerfold will be...

Whoopie Goldberg in a Tiny String Bikini to show off her/its/they/them Bootylious Hippo Body...........

Posted by: Franklin Stein at May 13, 2026 04:51 PM (5l41Z)

92 > And of course it's now essentially confirmed that Achilles, greatest warrior in Greek legend, the ideal of hypermasculinity, will be played by Ellen "Elliot" Page...

So stupid. Page is a 5'1" female hulking out with the artificial testosterone levels of a 70 year old man. She isn't even a good example of athleticism among women. 42 year old Jessie Graff is naturally more athletic than Page pumped full of artificial hormones.

Posted by: bonhomme at May 13, 2026 04:51 PM (mkw2N)

93 The only thing that knocks down "Ladyhawke" is the synth music. Otherwise its an A+ film for me!

Posted by: MAGA_Ken at May 13, 2026 04:51 PM (bKTDW)

94 As Evil Bloggerlady said, if Nolan had cast Sydney Sweeney as Helen of Troy, it would be a billion-dollar bonanza of a movie.

Ah well.

Posted by: Dr. T at May 13, 2026 04:51 PM (lHPJf)

95 Did they have rap in ancient mythic Greece?
---
They didn't. But they were very racist.

Posted by: Axeman at May 13, 2026 04:51 PM (Fi81e)

96
I'll rewatch "O Brother Where Art Thou", the best and most accurate telling of the Odyssey.
Posted by: Little Larry Sellers

Lassie Come Home

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 13, 2026 04:52 PM (Cqx++)

97 Nolan is one of the few filmmakers who is in a position to spurn the Oscars' ridiculous diversity requirements by making a blockbuster with best-picture buzz, so his decision to fall in line feels like a betrayal.

It's also one more move in a baffling series of decisions for this flick -- all-Imax cameras but muted cinematography to capture artless modern dialogue spoken in a plain American accent: on-location sets with inaccurate props; and now gross miscasting.

I haven't seen every Nolan movie, but this looks like the first to actively avoid.

Posted by: Bubba at May 13, 2026 04:52 PM (7Rxrs)

98 It’ll win 11 Oscars.
‘Tis the world we live in.

Posted by: Heroq at May 13, 2026 04:52 PM (S+xAM)

99 At least Pascal can pull it off, he did a good job playing Oberyn Martell. Unlike Lupita playing Helen of Troy. Her face might launch a thousand ships...in the other direction.

Posted by: runner at May 13, 2026 04:52 PM (GD0B3)

100 I'll rewatch "O Brother Where Art Thou", the best and most accurate telling of the Odyssey.
Posted by: Little Larry Sellers

Lassie Come Home
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 13, 2026 04:52 PM (Cqx++)

Lassie was always played by a male Collie because the hair is better.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 04:52 PM (8avO+)

101 Oral poetry, or as it used to be known as, a bunch of horseshit. Does Odysseus join a drum circle?

Posted by: ... at May 13, 2026 04:53 PM (QV+TG)

102 I enjoyed Troy. I won't watch this new POS movie, no matter if it's directed by Nolan. I'm deeply disappointed in him. This movie looks to be (and will be) a deserved flop.

Posted by: Tracy at May 13, 2026 04:53 PM (T5UBx)

103 As Evil Bloggerlady said, if Nolan had cast Sydney Sweeney as Helen of Troy, it would be a billion-dollar bonanza of a movie.

Ah well.
Posted by: Dr. T at May 13, 2026 04:51 PM (lHPJf)
---
It's not The Tits that Launched a Thousand Ships, though.

Posted by: Axeman at May 13, 2026 04:53 PM (Fi81e)

104 Pedro Pascal should have played Helen of Troy.

Posted by: Boss Moss at May 13, 2026 04:53 PM (+Vmst)

105 It’ll win 11 Oscars.
‘Tis the world we live in.
Posted by: Heroq at May 13, 2026 04:52 PM (S+xAM)

I'd win tons of awards if I gave them to me.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 04:53 PM (8avO+)

106 AI can't come fast enough.

Posted by: ... at May 13, 2026 04:53 PM (QV+TG)

107 As Evil Bloggerlady said, if Nolan had cast Sydney Sweeney as Helen of Troy, it would be a billion-dollar bonanza of a movie.

Ah well.
Posted by: Dr. T

===

100%

You would think some liberals would at least be willing to set aside a little ideology for the greenbacks, but not Hollywood liberals. They will go down with the ship every time.

What their peers think is the most important thing on Earth.

Posted by: Leupold at May 13, 2026 04:53 PM (eIzlH)

108 Ace, Jon Root's comment about Odysseus being incorrectly written as "vulnerable, arrogant, manipulative" is mostly wrong.

He is correct about him not being vulnerable...the dude was a hard-ass, and didn't much care about most other people. But he was absolutely arrogant and manipulative.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 13, 2026 04:53 PM (iERP6)

109 omg did you guys see the AI thing where the dude went thru Game of Thrones fixing everything?

so funny

Posted by: Greenland Polar Bears at May 13, 2026 04:54 PM (j+aD2)

110 I'll rewatch "O Brother Where Art Thou", the best and most accurate telling of the Odyssey.
Posted by: Little Larry Sellers

When my son's HS English class was reading The Odyssey, the teacher showed that movie. And this was in Fairfax, County, Virginia.

Posted by: Bulg at May 13, 2026 04:54 PM (77rzZ)

111 I saw Matt Dameon in "The Great Wall" which should be accurately named "Movie Whoring for Chinese Money."

It is dumb.

And Bruce Willis with an earpiece was less wooden.

It also has that dick-sipper Hispanical fellow, what the one that dates trannies.
Or whatever.

Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at May 13, 2026 04:54 PM (MtSIY)

112 It's not The Tits that Launched a Thousand Ships, though.
Posted by: Axeman at May 13, 2026 04:53 PM (Fi81e)

Tits that Launched a Thousand Triremes

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 04:54 PM (8avO+)

113 Odysseus himself is why I don't like The Odyssey as much as The Iliad. yeah he's a dick.

Posted by: Greenland Polar Bears at May 13, 2026 04:54 PM (j+aD2)

114 Well, Sean Bean is bad casting for Odysseus on account he doesn't get brutally killed

Posted by: gKWVE at May 13, 2026 04:54 PM (gKWVE)

115 91 I heard the next Playboy XXXL centerfold will be...

Whoopie Goldberg in a Tiny String Bikini to show off her/its/they/them Bootylious Hippo Body...........

I am Creaming in my pants just thinking about the centerfold, but do not tell Hilderbeast.....

Posted by: Bill Clinton at May 13, 2026 04:54 PM (j6UWQ)

116 Hollywood: shitted out this garbage.

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at May 13, 2026 04:54 PM (cWLG3)

117 The amount of beauty required to launch a ship is known as a milliHelen.

Posted by: The More You Know at May 13, 2026 04:54 PM (2Ez/1)

118 What happens when Hollywood remakes “Roots” with a bunch of Lily white Scandinavians.

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 13, 2026 04:55 PM (K639x)

119 There was a good 2-part miniseries back in the '90s with Armand Assante as Odysseus and Greta Scacchi as Penelope. It's still free on Amazon Prime.

Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, the Housekeeper at May 13, 2026 04:55 PM (U/s6V)

120 I thought Oppenheimer was overrated and now this. Hollywood is lost.

Posted by: Dr Spank at May 13, 2026 04:55 PM (VY8b0)

121 I was really looking forward to Nolan's Dunkirk, but I was seriously disappointed. Couldn't understand what he was trying to say. The evacuation of Dunkirk was done once and it was pretty good, but a good retelling could be awesome. Nolan's wasn't

Posted by: Smell the Glove at May 13, 2026 04:55 PM (gu0hJ)

122 Or he doesn't want to be disinvited from the cocktail parties. He heard about Dunkirk being "too white" from his peers, and couldn't live with it again. He didn't want to be rejected from the industry.

So, I have lost respect for him...
Posted by: Nova Local at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (tOcjL)

Frankly, I didn't think Dunkirk was all that good either. The overlapping timelines shtick really got away from him there, in my opinion. That plus Oppenheimer did it for me with Nolan.

Posted by: Dr. T at May 13, 2026 04:55 PM (lHPJf)

123 It’ll win 11 Oscars.
‘Tis the world we live in.
---
And not a single quotable line.
Just like Sinners.
Just like Obama.

Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at May 13, 2026 04:55 PM (MtSIY)

124 >>>93 The only thing that knocks down "Ladyhawke" is the synth music. Otherwise its an A+ film for me!

I think about watching that every once in a while. I remember the synth score being odd, but interesting and moody.

Posted by: ace at May 13, 2026 04:55 PM (1wjle)

125
Still want to see a bitchin' blood-soaked Adaptation of Anabasis.

The Warriors is interesting and cool, but frankly it's dated, and Walter Hill kinda missed the point of the original story.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at May 13, 2026 04:55 PM (y9nCu)

126 I thought Nolan had an independent streak. What a loser.

Posted by: ... at May 13, 2026 04:55 PM (QV+TG)

127 here's the GoT thing (on x)

x.com/rixhabh__/status/2054163881807986732

Posted by: Greenland Polar Bears at May 13, 2026 04:56 PM (j+aD2)

128 LET'S GO!!!

Posted by: Period-Authentic Odysseus at May 13, 2026 04:56 PM (cWLG3)

129 Hollywood is Gay.

Posted by: garrett at May 13, 2026 04:56 PM (xkXS7)

130
If you want to play the game, you could charge Nolan with insensitively failing to cast Greek actors and actresses. As it is, this is like casting Hispanic actors to play Charlie Chan and Fu Manchu.

Posted by: Blonde Mortixtl at May 13, 2026 04:56 PM (XJ22o)

131 Nolan should go full woke. In for a penny...

Cast Hillzabub as Priam and Kamala as Hector.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at May 13, 2026 04:57 PM (9C7ml)

132 It probably wasn't even filmed on Lesbos.

Posted by: Boss Moss at May 13, 2026 04:57 PM (+Vmst)

133 Ellen Paige is not a tranny, she’s a sick girl who went from being a hottie to looking like a soyboy dying from cancer

Posted by: The Unvaxed and Unmasked Ranger - Where Are My Keto Cheetos at May 13, 2026 04:57 PM (fapp/)

134 122 Or he doesn't want to be disinvited from the cocktail parties. He heard about Dunkirk being "too white" from his peers, and couldn't live with it again. He didn't want to be rejected from the industry.

So, I have lost respect for him...
Posted by: Nova Local at May 13, 2026 04:47 PM (tOcjL)

Frankly, I didn't think Dunkirk was all that good either. The overlapping timelines shtick really got away from him there, in my opinion. That plus Oppenheimer did it for me with Nolan.
Posted by: Dr. T at May 13, 2026 04:55 PM (lHPJf)

I also didn't really like Dunkirk...

Like M Night, it seems Nolan's best work was early (I love Memento)...

Posted by: Nova Local at May 13, 2026 04:57 PM (tOcjL)

135 Nollan is just jealous of the big bomb Oppenheimer made.

Posted by: Field Marshal Zhukov at May 13, 2026 04:57 PM (wBaIH)

136 I thought Nolan had an independent streak. What a loser.
Posted by: ...

==

probably did, but once they get to be the establishment, they want their seat at the table.

There's a long list of people that have done this over the years and they all seem to eventually sell out or get pushed out.

Posted by: Leupold at May 13, 2026 04:57 PM (eIzlH)

137 It's not The Tits that Launched a Thousand Ships, though.
Posted by: Axeman at May 13, 2026 04:53 PM (Fi81e)

Yeah, I'm sure Paris carried Helen away just because of her *face*.

Posted by: Dr. T at May 13, 2026 04:58 PM (lHPJf)

138 All his movies have been bloated bores in my opinion. Why would this be any different?

Posted by: Ordinary American at May 13, 2026 04:58 PM (fZiTB)

139 Might want to confirm this but,
On x just now.

Georgia Freedom Caucus
@FreedomCaucusGA
🚨BREAKING!

Georgia Governor Brian Kemp has called for a special session to redraw Georgia’s congressional and legislative maps.
Furthermore, the proclamation allows for the enactment of much-needed election law reform.

We must not let this opportunity go to waste.

The time is NOW to scrap the machines and go to paper ballots. The time is NOW to end racial gerrymandering and provide Georgians with fair electoral maps.

Posted by: whig at May 13, 2026 04:58 PM (E4rtv)

140 We enjoyed Project Hail Mary, which makes 2 fun movies I’ve seen in theaters in the last 10 years, the other being Top Gun Maverick.

I grew up loving movies but I’m not sure it’s worth caring about anymore.

Posted by: Jack Squat Bupkis at May 13, 2026 04:59 PM (GD2xa)

141 Sweeney would have been like 28 when they were filming. So, taken to Troy at 17 or 18 which is reasonable for the culture back then.
Sweeney would have been a perfect Helen of Troy. You could still see her and think... yeah. They'd have launched a navy for that one.
Terry Pratchett did a joke version of Faust called "Eric" where Helen was 35 years old, pudgy, and sporting a faint moustache. It was funny but with a contemporary English understanding which was not the Archaic Greek understanding.

Posted by: gKWVE at May 13, 2026 04:59 PM (gKWVE)

142 The only movie I liked with Nolan’s name on it was Batman Begins

A movie so awesome not even Katie Holmes could ruin it

His other movies range from meh to dicklessweenishly retarded

Posted by: The Unvaxed and Unmasked Ranger - Where Are My Keto Cheetos at May 13, 2026 04:59 PM (fapp/)

143 What is also creepy about the Ellen Page thing is the effort made to rewrite all her film credits to "fix" her pronouns.

Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, the Housekeeper at May 13, 2026 04:59 PM (U/s6V)

144 Actual proclamation here which specifically mentions redistricting.

https://tinyurl.com/Kemp-proclamation

Posted by: whig at May 13, 2026 05:00 PM (E4rtv)

145 Georgia Governor Brian Kemp has called for a special session to redraw Georgia’s congressional and legislative maps.
Furthermore, the proclamation allows for the enactment of much-needed election law reform.

We must not let this opportunity go to waste.

The time is NOW to scrap the machines and go to paper ballots. The time is NOW to end racial gerrymandering and provide Georgians with fair electoral maps.
Posted by: whig at May 13, 2026 04:58 PM (E4rtv)

It's Gerrymandered to put Fulton Co. in no district at all.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 05:00 PM (8avO+)

146 > Ellen Paige is not a tranny

She cut off her boobs. She's a tranny.

She's not a man. She'll never be a man. She's definitely a tranny.

Posted by: bonhomme at May 13, 2026 05:00 PM (mkw2N)

147 Achilles then: First I put on this brilliant armor, then I kill your Hectors, then I bang your priestesses, and twinks, and well, anything with a hole

Achilles now: Uh, I lost my penis somewhere...let me go find it. Armor? I can't carry that stuff, don't you have a fuzzy sweater I can wear?

Posted by: 18-1 at May 13, 2026 05:00 PM (sKqQm)

148 I'm trying to think of a race swap that didn't suck. I don't know, it's hard.

Posted by: bob (moron inbobnitus) at May 13, 2026 05:00 PM (HBms5)

149 "The time is NOW to end racial gerrymandering and provide Georgians with fair electoral maps.
Posted by: whig"

Well the time was 30 years ago but ok, let's go. My district is ridiculously racially manipulated.

Posted by: fd at May 13, 2026 05:00 PM (vFG9F)

150 140 We enjoyed Project Hail Mary, which makes 2 fun movies I’ve seen in theaters in the last 10 years, the other being Top Gun Maverick.

I grew up loving movies but I’m not sure it’s worth caring about anymore.
Posted by: Jack Squat Bupkis
=======
Got an announcement yesterday that Project Hail Mary is on youtube with commercials now. From google.

Posted by: whig at May 13, 2026 05:01 PM (E4rtv)

151 The modern music in a Knight's Tale was stupid and terrible. Totally broke immersion.

I have no plans to see this version of the Odyssey, but then again I scarcely ever watch modern movies anyway.

Hail Mary Project was good.

Posted by: Martbell at May 13, 2026 05:01 PM (RV7qC)

152
so sick of:

Zendaya

Posted by: Greenland Polar Bears

==============

As omnipresent as Zendaya is, I can't even tell whether she's a good actress. I haven't seen her in a movie with decent dialog or character development. She can recite her lines, but so could AI.

So I'm sick of her, too.

Posted by: Blonde Mortixtl at May 13, 2026 05:01 PM (XJ22o)

153 A Knight's Tale

Wasn’t that the one with Heath Ledger?
With the light-skinned black actress playing a Middle Ages princess in England?

Thats’s like the prototype woke movie made for the modern audience, I believe.

At least it was an original story so they could play loose with it.

Posted by: SpeakingOf at May 13, 2026 05:01 PM (6ydKt)

154 Kemp is such a cuck he's not going to gerrymander the Congressional maps. He might redraw the local Senate/ House maps for Georgia, but only if it can get his RiNO polycule into the legislature.
That said, it'll be nice if somehow some Republican can slip election-integrity into the package.

Posted by: gKWVE at May 13, 2026 05:01 PM (gKWVE)

155 All of the fake states in New England need to be reunified.

Posted by: Boss Moss at May 13, 2026 05:01 PM (+Vmst)

156
This week's movies:

The Sheep Detectives-

Old-fashioned family style movie about sheep who solve their shepherd's murder. Some good laughs, very leisurely time at the movies. Feel good ending. Very small children may be bored.

Hokum

I can't go into a lot of details without spoilers. Depressed writer who's working on the ending to his long-awaited final book in a popular trilogy. Is depressed. He goes to a hotel in Ireland where his parents had their happiest days to leave their ashes. Mysteries occur including mention of some supernatural goings on within the hotel.
Hijinks ensue.
I like the way this one comes together and it wants to make you feel uneasy rather than out right frighten you.
Made by the same guy who did "Caveat" and "Oddity"- so you know what to expect if you seen those...a slow burn, intelligently written scary movie.

BONUS! We watched the series "The Chestnut Man" on Netflix. Very good throwback to the serial killer thrillers of the 90's. There's 2 seasons with two different mysteries...worth your time.

Posted by: naturalfake at May 13, 2026 05:01 PM (iJfKG)

157 27 I had to look up Lupito Nyong'o's photo, because I have no idea who she is. And after looking at her, I still don't.

She is a pleasant looking woman, but there are many better looking actresses available, and even if Nolan was fixated on Helen being black (which he obviously was) there are many better looking black actresses.

Maybe she launched a drone flown by a 12-year-old boy while she was skinny-dipping in her backyard pool. But a thousand ships? Nope.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (iERP6)
---
Leila Arcieri still launches my ship, if you know what I mean.

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at May 13, 2026 05:02 PM (cWLG3)

158 Willowed from the last thread, and somewhat on topic:

i want to blow off some steam about something that happened earlier today. At the office, not here, lol.

I'm a tech for a printer company. I go to different firms and office scattered around the Philly region. Today, I was at a site where all of the workers were minorities. I was the only white person there. Most of the time, there's no issue, everyone gets along. Today, however, they were playing the local hip-hop station on the radio. The "music" is bad enough, but in between songs, the DJ's and host were ripping Trump, SCOTUS, the South, etc. For some reason, they were really dumping on Scott Jennings. Not just boilerplate lefty hate, some of the stuff was risible. I'm wondering if I should complain about it and put a target on my back (everyone would know it was me), or just shake my head and marvel at the ignorance. I mean, if I came in and started blasting Sirius Patriot or some other RW talk show, I'd be sent to HR in a heartbeat. I don't want to argue about this shit in a corporate setting.

Posted by: Kareem of Wheat at May 13, 2026 05:02 PM (Cjger)

159 It's Gerrymandered to put Fulton Co. in no district at all.
Posted by: Oldcat
======
They should.

Posted by: whig at May 13, 2026 05:02 PM (E4rtv)

160 I'm trying to think of a race swap that didn't suck. I don't know, it's hard

***********

Morgan Freeman as Red in the Shawshank Redemption

The original Red from the novel was a pasty white Irish with red hair

Freeman made it work though, as unlike today’s dei shitfucks, he can actually act

Posted by: The Unvaxed and Unmasked Ranger - Where Are My Keto Cheetos at May 13, 2026 05:03 PM (fapp/)

161 I really liked “Ladyhawke”

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 13, 2026 05:03 PM (YRXS4)

162 If he wanted a "different" and "female centric" take make the movie about Odysseus time with Circe and make her the protagonist - some Greek asshole shows up on her island to cause trouble and she and he eventually fall in love but eventually he has to leave...

Posted by: 18-1 at May 13, 2026 05:03 PM (sKqQm)

163 E. Jean Carroll - You get NOTHING

Posted by: Willy Womka at May 13, 2026 05:03 PM (gtcuf)

164 154 Kemp is such a cuck he's not going to gerrymander the Congressional maps. He might redraw the local Senate/ House maps for Georgia, but only if it can get his RiNO polycule into the legislature.
That said, it'll be nice if somehow some Republican can slip election-integrity into the package.
Posted by: gKWVE
========
Congressional districts are included in the call for the special session. See the proclamation.

Kemp may be trying to save his own ass with what is coming regarding voter fraud in 2020.

Posted by: whig at May 13, 2026 05:03 PM (E4rtv)

165 Funny enough, he won't win b/c Dune 3 probably will. So, he emasculated himself for...nothing...just the chance for the nomination (which you can't receive without a DEI enough cast)...
Posted by: Nova Local at May 13, 2026 04:41 PM (tOcjL)

Funny, that, 'cause I stopped watching Dune 1 when the gender-swapped girlboss Liet-Kynes showed up.

They just want to ruin everything, don't they?

Posted by: Not Enough Lampposts at May 13, 2026 05:04 PM (JcF+m)

166 As omnipresent as Zendaya is, I can't even tell whether she's a good actress. I haven't seen her in a movie with decent dialog or character development. She can recite her lines, but so could AI.

So I'm sick of her, too.
Posted by: Blonde Mortixtl

==

She's a terrible actress, I'm embarrassed to admit I've watched a few episodes of her in Euphoria.

If she was all white, she'd be an absolute nobody.

Trying not to sound terrible here, but she's basically pretty for a black woman (because she has white features) but gets the check box for the half black skin.

Posted by: Leupold at May 13, 2026 05:04 PM (eIzlH)

167 I'm sticking with my Don't Buy from People Who Hate Me policy, which means I won't be watching Nolan's take on The Odyssey.

Such a shame. As a kid--I mean as a really young kid who learned to read early--I was enraptured by Edith Hamilton's collection of Greek myths, 'Timeless Tales of Gods and Heroes'. I would have loved to see a big budget Hollywood epic faithful to its source material. But no. Instead, we get this.

Another thing, too. Based on the recent Animal Farm debacle, I get the sense these people are deliberately attempting to corrupt and destroy classics of Western civilization by replacing them in the public mind with Woke agitprop. It sickens me.

Posted by: troyriser at May 13, 2026 05:04 PM (DPeYO)

168 I didn't think Dunkirk was all that good either.
[.]
That plus Oppenheimer did it for me with Nolan.

Posted by: Dr. T at May 13, 2026 04:55 PM (lHPJf)

Dunkirk was...okay. I thought Oppenheimer was quite good, if overlong and too aware of itself.

I love the Iliad and the Odyssey, and it really pisses me off that a director who could do anything he wanted with the books has chosen to make a crapfest that will be forgotten soon, even if it makes some money.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 13, 2026 05:04 PM (iERP6)

169 Sweeney would have been like 28 when they were filming. So, taken to Troy at 17 or 18 which is reasonable for the culture back then.
Sweeney would have been a perfect Helen of Troy. You could still see her and think... yeah. They'd have launched a navy for that one.
Terry Pratchett did a joke version of Faust called "Eric" where Helen was 35 years old, pudgy, and sporting a faint moustache. It was funny but with a contemporary English understanding which was not the Archaic Greek understanding.
Posted by: gKWVE at May 13, 2026 04:59 PM (gKWVE)

Not an expert on this timeline, but Helen had the competition for marriage then was married to Menelaus for a while before Paris got involved with the three Goddesses in a bitchfight. So she doesn't have to be hugely young, myths say she had one daughter with him and possibly 2 sons, but before or after going off to Troy for 10 years isn't stated.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 05:05 PM (8avO+)

170 "The "music" is bad enough, but in between songs, the DJ's and host were ripping Trump, SCOTUS, the South, etc."

Was it the "Black Radio Network (BIN) "? I am not making that up, there is such a thing.

Posted by: fd at May 13, 2026 05:05 PM (vFG9F)

171 I'm surprised they didn't make Helen of Troy a man and call him Troy of Helen.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 13, 2026 05:05 PM (n5tGW)

172 So Achilles was a Trannie all along

Posted by: Skip at May 13, 2026 05:05 PM (Ia/+0)

173 Would Nolan have made these changes if the Oscars didn’t require a certain number of minorities to qualify for a nomination?

I doubt it.

We might have seen Sydney as Helen of Troy if it wasn’t for Hollywood forcing everybody to bow at the altar of intersectional allyship.

Posted by: SpeakingOf at May 13, 2026 05:05 PM (6ydKt)

174 Zendaya is a mediocre actress and while not ugly a mediocre looker.

She must have incredible casting couch game.

Watching her in Dune was like watching Cruise in Valkyrie but at least Cruise was in that to get funding...

Posted by: 18-1 at May 13, 2026 05:06 PM (sKqQm)

175 She's not a man. She'll never be a man. She's definitely a tranny.

*****************

Trannies like to call themselves trannies which is why I don’t call them trannies

I will however refer to Ellen Paige as a boobie cutter offer

Posted by: The Unvaxed and Unmasked Ranger - Where Are My Keto Cheetos at May 13, 2026 05:06 PM (fapp/)

176 Black Information Network. I have stumbled across that.

Posted by: fd at May 13, 2026 05:07 PM (vFG9F)

177 The Odyssey will be released in the Odious Odeum by Odo the Shapeshifter

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at May 13, 2026 05:07 PM (qx7Zg)

178 169 Sweeney would have been like 28 when they were filming. So, taken to Troy at 17 or 18 which is reasonable for the culture back then.
Sweeney would have been a perfect Helen of Troy. You could still see her and think... yeah. They'd have launched a navy for that one.
Terry Pratchett did a joke version of Faust called "Eric" where Helen was 35 years old, pudgy, and sporting a faint moustache. It was funny but with a contemporary English understanding which was not the Archaic Greek understanding.
Posted by: gKWVE at May 13, 2026 04:59 PM (gKWVE)

Not an expert on this timeline, but Helen had the competition for marriage then was married to Menelaus for a while before Paris got involved with the three Goddesses in a bitchfight. So she doesn't have to be hugely young, myths say she had one daughter with him and possibly 2 sons, but before or after going off to Troy for 10 years isn't stated.
Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 05:05 PM (8avO+)
---
Did Aphrodite have a hand in making Paris fall for Helen? I remember she supported Troy in the war (what good did that do, right 🙄

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at May 13, 2026 05:07 PM (cWLG3)

179 I can think of *one* gender swap that worked. Joss Whedon's Much Ado About Nothing, making Conrade a female.

And yes, Joss Whedon is an asshole of the highest order and I loathe him. But, that was a total winner of a film.

And Conrade just worked as a female, and with only a very few pronoun swaps in the script. I daresay The Bard himself might have made Conrade a woman had he had available more actors that could play women.

Posted by: Delurker at May 13, 2026 05:07 PM (gtcuf)

180 Leila Arcieri still launches my ship, if you know what I mean.

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at May 13, 2026 05:02 PM (cWLG3)

Oh yes. Gorgeous, and very sexy.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 13, 2026 05:07 PM (iERP6)

181
I'll rewatch "O Brother Where Art Thou", the best and most accurate telling of the Odyssey.
Posted by: Little Larry Sellers at May 13, 2026 04:49 PM (RW1OD)

Tell me that you've never read the Odyssey without telling me that you've never read the Odyssey.

OBWAT is a fun bit of fluff that swerves occasionally into Odyssey's neighborhood but it is in no way an accurate retelling of the Odyssey.

Posted by: naturalfake at May 13, 2026 05:08 PM (iJfKG)

182 Lupita Nyong'o is not bad looking, but not 'face that launches a thousand ships" good looking. Maybe could launch a few dinghies, though. To be fair, Sydney Sweeney also doesn't have the face for the role.

Posted by: Chuck Martel at May 13, 2026 05:08 PM (wUvwL)

183 The Academy Awards should have Male, Female and Best Trannie awards

Posted by: Skip at May 13, 2026 05:08 PM (Ia/+0)

184 172 So Achilles was a Trannie all along
Posted by: Skip at May 13, 2026 05:05 PM (Ia/+0)
---
Hades had his dick removed and made him 5'1". Pretty dang harsh if you ask me.

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at May 13, 2026 05:08 PM (cWLG3)

185 BTW there is a tablet we have between a Hittite ruler and a Greek ruler. It mentions a conflict at Wilusa (Troy).

The one surprising thing in it? Priam was a greek adventurer himself.

Posted by: 18-1 at May 13, 2026 05:09 PM (sKqQm)

186 the orchestra did not exist in ancient Greece and so the movie shouldn't have an orchestral score.

Nor did English.

Posted by: t-bird at May 13, 2026 05:09 PM (E/qck)

187 Since her boobs were cut and now she's Achilles, can we start referring to boobs as Achilles' Heels? Cuz they kinda are for me.

Posted by: Wally at May 13, 2026 05:09 PM (0e5Te)

188 173 Would Nolan have made these changes if the Oscars didn’t require a certain number of minorities to qualify for a nomination?

I doubt it.

We might have seen Sydney as Helen of Troy if it wasn’t for Hollywood forcing everybody to bow at the altar of intersectional allyship.
Posted by: SpeakingOf at May 13, 2026 05:05 PM (6ydKt)

But he didn't NEED to...he just wanted a gold star from his peers...

Posted by: Nova Local at May 13, 2026 05:09 PM (tOcjL)

189 @181 THANK YOU!

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at May 13, 2026 05:09 PM (cWLG3)

190 Joss Whedon is kind of a funny guy because while he can make entertaining movies he has no idea how he does it and you can see the conscious mind spewing a bunch of BS unrelated to what he actually did when he was making good movies/shows.

Posted by: 18-1 at May 13, 2026 05:10 PM (sKqQm)

191 the most period-accurate epic of ancient mythic Greece ever

Them old greek homos

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at May 13, 2026 05:10 PM (Kt19C)

192 I consider most of Nolan’s movies to be guilty pleasures.

They worked when they conveyed emotion, like Prestige, Inception and Interstellar, even if you thought about them later and said, wait a minute, that was stupid!

Dunkirk and Tenet were incoherent and emotionless, delivered with a shrug.

The Batman movies stand alone. I didn’t like them, mostly, but I’ve forgotten why.

Didn’t and won’t see Oppenheimer.

Posted by: Jack Squat Bupkis at May 13, 2026 05:10 PM (GD2xa)

193 Did Aphrodite have a hand in making Paris fall for Helen? I remember she supported Troy in the war (what good did that do, right 🙄.
Posted by: Chairman LMAO at May 13, 2026 05:07 PM (cWLG3)

All three goddesses (Athena, Aphrodite and Hera) tried to bribe him to give them the apple of discord tossed into Pelius and Thetis' marriage feast labelled 'for the fairest'. They went all the way to Troy to Paris herding sheep and he took the bribe of the prettiest wife over the other two.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 05:10 PM (8avO+)

194 Rome is more fun anyway.

Posted by: Boss Moss at May 13, 2026 05:11 PM (+Vmst)

195 Can I put in an unsolicited plug for "The Sheep Detectives?" It's not an "important" ~~movie~~ film like "The Odyssey" but it's enjoyable and charming. Sort of like an extended episode of "Murder, She Wrote" but with talking sheep. Also with enough heartstring-tugging to make Ol' Yeller go "Really?" but that's part of the charm. Not particularly woke. One black character who is not a hero and one Asian character who is also not a hero but is sympathetic.

Posted by: Oddbob at May 13, 2026 05:11 PM (vTZFs)

196 She's not a man. She'll never be a man. She's definitely a tranny.

Posted by: bonhomme at May 13, 2026 05:00 PM (mkw2N)

Or...we discard their word for it and call Page what she is: a deeply disturbed woman -- probably psychotic -- who needs comprehensive psychotherapy, drug therapy, and some reconstructive surgery to repair the damage she has done to herself.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 13, 2026 05:11 PM (iERP6)

197 Would anyone be surprised to see Kemp try and give the Dems more seats?

Posted by: Smell the Glove at May 13, 2026 05:11 PM (gu0hJ)

198 Odyssey's neighborhood but it is in no way an accurate retelling of the Odyssey.

**************

I don’t know John Goodman struck me as a very credible Polyphemus

Posted by: The Unvaxed and Unmasked Ranger - Where Are My Keto Cheetos at May 13, 2026 05:12 PM (fapp/)

199 >>She's not a man. She'll never be a man. She's definitely a tranny.

She's a mental patient. A sad failure of society and our medical profession. It shames our society that she is out in public.

Posted by: bob (moron inbobnitus) at May 13, 2026 05:12 PM (HBms5)

200 Kemp was a damn hero on Covid. Him and DeSantis. GA and FL opening up and flourishing made it impossible for the Dem-MSM complex to continue the ruse.

On nearly everything else, Kemp is a disappointment.

Posted by: Delurker at May 13, 2026 05:13 PM (gtcuf)

201 He has the Beavis look down pat. Or maybe it's Butthead.

Posted by: t-bird at May 13, 2026 05:13 PM (E/qck)

202 Did Aphrodite have a hand in making Paris fall for Helen? I remember she supported Troy in the war (what good did that do, right 🙄.
Posted by: Chairman LMAO at May 13, 2026 05:07 PM (cWLG3)

It was funny when she got too close and someone wounded her with a spear (with Athena's help I think). Dinner time at Olympus must have been a blast.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 05:13 PM (8avO+)

203 In it, Menelaus invites tales of Odysseus to be told.

So...the story of Odysseus is going to be told by the people in Ithaca as they wait for Penelope to tell them who she's going to marry.

Not gonna lie, that makes no damn sense.

Why would Menelaus be in Ithaca? And why would any of these people know what Odysseus is doing while he's still on the journey to get where they are?

Posted by: FeatherBlade at May 13, 2026 05:13 PM (vJrRc)

204 >>Lupita Nyong'o is not bad looking

Her tiny ears freak me out.

Posted by: garrett at May 13, 2026 05:14 PM (xkXS7)

205 But he didn't NEED to...he just wanted a gold star from his peers...
Posted by: Nova Local at May 13, 2026 05:09 PM (tOcjL)

No he didn’t need to.

But getting a Best Picture Oscar is guaranteed to make more money these days in our fractured media market.

I can see why he did it, and he may have been told to do it by the people writing the checks.

Until the Oscars changes the rules all potentially award-winning films will have to meet the quotas.

Posted by: SpeakingOf at May 13, 2026 05:14 PM (6ydKt)

206 I, too, enjoyed The Sheep Detectives. The nudity was essential to the plot, and my sexual gratification.
The humans were OK too, I guess.

Posted by: Montana Rancher at May 13, 2026 05:14 PM (0e5Te)

207 Yeah, "The Ten Commandments" was great until they had a soundtrack instead of a rapper. Same with "Quest for Fire", "Troy" and "Jason and the Argonauts."

They all could have been great, but they played music instead of Snoop Dog.

Posted by: Orson at May 13, 2026 05:14 PM (dIske)

208 This went from the movie I was most interested in seeing that would actually get me to a theater to I wouldn't watch it if it was the only thing left in the world after a nuclear apocalypse.

Congratulations Nolan. You ruined a classic European epic to satisfy the leftist desire to deconstruct all of Western Civilization and destroy reality.

Posted by: EasilyBored at May 13, 2026 05:15 PM (83jOt)

209 OBWAT is a fun bit of fluff that swerves occasionally into Odyssey's neighborhood but it is in no way an accurate retelling of the Odyssey.

Posted by: naturalfake

--------------

You mean Odysseus did *not* leave the wedding ring in the chiffonier?

Posted by: bob (moron inbobnitus) at May 13, 2026 05:15 PM (HBms5)

210 Nolan obviously grew a vagina, and now loves to receive anal.

Posted by: Jellybowl at May 13, 2026 05:15 PM (BBiil)

211 Everything Zendya touches, turns to shit. Only the insane hotness of Sydney Sweeny naked keeps Euphoria alive.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at May 13, 2026 05:15 PM (xcxpd)

212 On the plus side, after this bombs, Nolan can give us all the 'Prometheus 2' movie we all deserve.

Posted by: Stateless - He ain't heavy, he's my dog at May 13, 2026 05:15 PM (Sco7b)

213 >>>At least it was an original story so they could play loose with it.

also it was a comedy and comedy allows you a lot of leeway to be silly.

Posted by: ace at May 13, 2026 05:16 PM (1wjle)

214 Did Aphrodite have a hand in making Paris fall for Helen? I remember she supported Troy in the war (what good did that do, right 🙄.
Posted by: Chairman LMAO

Aphrodite promised Paris that he would have the most beautiful woman in the world if he awarded her the golden apple that Eris (chaos goddess) had chucked into the middle of a gods-gathering with the label "to the fairest" on it.

Posted by: FeatherBlade at May 13, 2026 05:16 PM (vJrRc)

215 Not gonna lie, that makes no damn sense.

Why would Menelaus be in Ithaca? And why would any of these people know what Odysseus is doing while he's still on the journey to get where they are?
Posted by: FeatherBlade at May 13, 2026 05:13 PM (vJrRc)

He wasn't when Odysseus came home, only the nasty suitors were. He would have been home in Sparta, and there's even a part where O's son goes and visits him there looking for clues where he was.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 05:16 PM (8avO+)

216 Incidentally, I thought the consensus was that that Page girl was lined up to play Hermes (a sort of androgenous deity).

Posted by: Orson at May 13, 2026 05:17 PM (dIske)

217
Has the orchestra lyres made using tortoise shells?

Authenticity, mofo!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at May 13, 2026 05:17 PM (6NHCw)

218 Didn’t and won’t see Oppenheimer.

Posted by: Jack Squat Bupkis at May 13, 2026 05:10 PM (GD2xa)
---
Also didn't, and probably won't bother to see it.

I paid for Super Mario Galaxy to help out my brother in Christ, Chris Pratt.

I was glad I watched Hail Mary Project because it was fun.

Posted by: Axeman at May 13, 2026 05:17 PM (Fi81e)

219 I was a Dapper Dan man.

Posted by: Odysseus at May 13, 2026 05:17 PM (0e5Te)

220 "Lupita Nyong'o as Helen of Troy"

Proof that Hollywood hates you.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at May 13, 2026 05:17 PM (xcxpd)

221 I cast him because I wanted to nod towards the idea that this story has been handed down as oral poetry, which is analogous to rap.

There are classic rap songs that have been handed down for twenty years! Just like ancient Greek literature.

Posted by: t-bird at May 13, 2026 05:18 PM (E/qck)

222
It was funny when she got too close and someone wounded her with a spear (with Athena's help I think). Dinner time at Olympus must have been a blast.
Posted by: Oldcat

YOU BITCH!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at May 13, 2026 05:18 PM (6NHCw)

223 Seriously though, the Page-borg plays Achilles?

One of Greece's mightiest warriors, and she probably can't even parry an average male swinging a sword.

Posted by: Axeman at May 13, 2026 05:19 PM (Fi81e)

224 Incidentally, I thought the consensus was that that Page girl was lined up to play Hermes (a sort of androgenous deity).
Posted by: Orson at May 13, 2026 05:17 PM (dIske)

androgenous? he had adventures and invented the lyre when he was a little baby god.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 05:19 PM (8avO+)

225 Elliot Page as Achilles? Good grief!

If Nolan wanted accuracy, he needed to see how ancient Greeks envisioned Achilles. All he had to do was look at some authentic ancient Greek pottery. Here is a piece showing Achilles killing the Amazon Queen Penthesilea. Dated to 540–530 B.C., a black-figured amphora (wine-jar), signed by Exekias as potter and attributed to him as painter.

https://tinyurl.com/3v3h5z54

Posted by: Gref at May 13, 2026 05:19 PM (5rh/l)

226 So every day, when I take Dubby for his walkies, I carry a little roll of baggies. After he does his bizness, I bag it up and toss it in the nearest receptacle. So I guess my point is, both.

Posted by: Farmer Bob at May 13, 2026 05:20 PM (IX8iX)

227 These arguments about not having good orchestral scores because it isn't period appropriate are garbage. A good orchestral score is timeless.

They also didn't have electricity, artificial lighting, or fucking film back then. You're telling a STORY, no re-enacting history.

This shit gets me literally enraged.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at May 13, 2026 05:21 PM (xcxpd)

228 I was a Dapper Dan man.

Posted by: Odysseus at May 13, 2026 05:17 PM (0e5Te)
---
Who remains "unaffiliated".

Posted by: Axeman at May 13, 2026 05:21 PM (Fi81e)

229 Hey guys,

We have a launch in about 65 minutes.

SpaceX - Falcon 9 - CRS SpX-34
SLC-40 - Cape Canaveral SFS - Space Affairs Live
Launch Date: May 13, 2026 (EDT)
Launch Time: 6:50 p.m. EDT (2250 UTC (May 14, 00:50 CEST)

https://youtu.be/J4iAX4BDmuA

Posted by: Joyenz at May 13, 2026 05:21 PM (2F0/Y)

230
Lupita Nyong'o

Sound effects are taking actors' roles? Fookin' AI!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at May 13, 2026 05:22 PM (6NHCw)

231 Do you know how they separate the men from the boys in Greece?

Me neither.

Posted by: Ellen "Playboy (get it?)" Page at May 13, 2026 05:22 PM (47/pr)

232 Things Ellen Page/Achilles couldn't do:

Lift a shield
Use a spear
Have PIV with Briseis
Have PIB with Patroclus.

Posted by: 18-1 at May 13, 2026 05:22 PM (sKqQm)

233 They commin' to attacks us
We all see 'um
We poppin' caps in they ass
at the Colisuem.

It's inscribed on the tablet.

Posted by: Gunslinger at May 13, 2026 05:22 PM (R2gO3)

234 BTW there is a tablet we have between a Hittite ruler and a Greek ruler. It mentions a conflict at Wilusa (Troy).

The one surprising thing in it? Priam was a greek adventurer himself.
Posted by: 18-1 at May 13, 2026 05:09 PM (sKqQm)

It would be an explanation of why Troy was so heavily contested. It was a major port for Western Anatolia, which was not consolidated by Hattusha, and exposed to the Greeks who had rolled up the Cretan trading routes. Once one Greek adventurer captured it, all the others would want it too, especially since it would not be able to call for help from the other Anatolian city states.

Posted by: Kindltot at May 13, 2026 05:22 PM (rbvCR)

235 So instead of the heel, Achilles will get shot in the vagina?

Posted by: wth at May 13, 2026 05:22 PM (UjdFS)

236 219 I was a Dapper Dan man.
Posted by: Odysseus at May 13, 2026 05:17 PM (0e5Te)

---------

But did you ever get paid to sing into a can?

Posted by: bob (moron inbobnitus) at May 13, 2026 05:23 PM (HBms5)

237 Elliot Page as Achilles? Good grief!

If Nolan wanted accuracy, he needed to see how ancient Greeks envisioned Achilles. All he had to do was look at some authentic ancient Greek pottery. Here is a piece showing Achilles killing the Amazon Queen Penthesilea. Dated to 540–530 B.C., a black-figured amphora (wine-jar), signed by Exekias as potter and attributed to him as painter.

https://tinyurl.com/3v3h5z54
Posted by: Gref at May 13, 2026 05:19 PM (5rh/l)
---
That's what I'm saying. Achilles needs to be a badass, not some scrawny girl pumping herself with T so she can manage lean muscle.

Posted by: Axeman at May 13, 2026 05:23 PM (Fi81e)

238 t would be an explanation of why Troy was so heavily contested. It was a major port for Western Anatolia, which was not consolidated by Hattusha, and exposed to the Greeks who had rolled up the Cretan trading routes. Once one Greek adventurer captured it, all the others would want it too, especially since it would not be able to call for help from the other Anatolian city states.
Posted by: Kindltot at May 13, 2026 05:22 PM (rbvCR)

Well in the story Troy did get help from a number of places in Anatolia and the Black Sea area, just not enough when all the heroes were there.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 05:24 PM (8avO+)

239 Do you know how they separate the men from the boys in Greece?

Me neither.
Posted by: Ellen "Playboy (get it?)" Page
......

With a fire hose.

Posted by: wth at May 13, 2026 05:25 PM (UjdFS)

240 Who remains "unaffiliated".
Posted by: Axeman

He's bonafied

Posted by: bob (moron inbobnitus) at May 13, 2026 05:25 PM (HBms5)

241 Well ain't AoSHQ a geographical oddity. #twoweeks from everywhere!

Posted by: Ulysses Everett McGill at May 13, 2026 05:25 PM (Q6P2R)

242
I'm mass communicatin'!

-- Menelaus "Pappy" O'Daniel

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at May 13, 2026 05:25 PM (6NHCw)

243 Do you know how they separate the men from the boys in Greece?

Me neither.
Posted by: Ellen "Playboy (get it?)" Page
......

With a fire hose.
Posted by: wth at May 13, 2026 05:25 PM (UjdFS)
---
I heard "crow bar".

Posted by: Axeman at May 13, 2026 05:25 PM (Fi81e)

244
I'm trying to think of a race swap that didn't suck. I don't know, it's hard.
Posted by: bob (moron inbobnitus) at May 13, 2026 05:00 PM (HBms5)

Toshiro Mifune in Throne of Blood (Kurosawa's version of Macbeth)

Denzel in The Tragedy of Macbeth

Anything other than a Shakespeare adaptation? Bill S is so frickin' awesome that even a race-swap really has to work at it to fuck it up totally.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at May 13, 2026 05:25 PM (y9nCu)

245 In lieu of an orchestra, there will be a Greek chorus of AWFLs.

Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at May 13, 2026 05:25 PM (w6EFb)

246 Since the thread will be replaced soon, I liked the first 3 Hellraiser movies. They were entertaining, not really scary but entertaining.

Amazing effects for decades ago. Terry Farrell from DS9 was the star of the third film.

Number 4 takes place well into the future aboard a spaceship. Not promising.

I have a lot of computer work to do so I may have a lot of these later ones in the background.

Posted by: Stateless - He ain't heavy, he's my dog at May 13, 2026 05:26 PM (Sco7b)

247
Mrs. Hogwlop done R U N N O F T

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at May 13, 2026 05:26 PM (6NHCw)

248 The Return, I thought was interesting where Odysseus is broken and suffering from PTSD from the journey when he returns home.

Posted by: Patrick From Ohio at May 13, 2026 05:26 PM (ubCxQ)

249 Oh boy, another chance to save money!

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at May 13, 2026 05:27 PM (CHHv1)

250
We are the Karens and we agree!
We agree! We agree! We agree!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at May 13, 2026 05:27 PM (6NHCw)

251 Brad Pitt looked like Greeks would have imagined Achilles.

Not sure what young action stars there are now but you'd want something:

Good looking
Tall
Buff
Blonde
And dripping arrogance.

Posted by: 18-1 at May 13, 2026 05:27 PM (sKqQm)

252 216 Incidentally, I thought the consensus was that that Page girl was lined up to play Hermes (a sort of androgenous deity).
______

I liked Hermes as the elf who wanted to be a dentist and did shenanigans with an odd reindeer who had a nose that lit up like a red brake light bulb.

Posted by: Chuck Martel at May 13, 2026 05:27 PM (wUvwL)

253 213 >>>At least it was an original story so they could play loose with it.

also it was a comedy and comedy allows you a lot of leeway to be silly.
Posted by: ace at May 13, 2026 05:16 PM (1wjle)

True.
It was also very different from the usual so it was a novelty at the time.

If they made it today it would fit right in the Netflix library and be quite unremarkable.

Posted by: SpeakingOf at May 13, 2026 05:28 PM (6ydKt)

254 Good looking
Tall
Buff
Blonde
And dripping arrogance.
Posted by: 18-1 at May 13, 2026 05:27 PM (sKqQm)
---
Chris Hemsworth might be a little too old, now.

Posted by: Axeman at May 13, 2026 05:28 PM (Fi81e)

255 Well in the story Troy did get help from a number of places in Anatolia and the Black Sea area, just not enough when all the heroes were there.

The theory would be a number of cities didn't want a Greek army there and so helped. But not the Hittites as a whole because...screw that guy Priam...

Also, Priam being Greek explains why the Trojans had Greek gods...

Posted by: 18-1 at May 13, 2026 05:29 PM (sKqQm)

256
It mentions a conflict at Wilusa (Troy).

Maybe that's Troy.

And maybe it ain't.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at May 13, 2026 05:29 PM (6NHCw)

257
How good could her face had looked after launching a thousand ships, though?!

Posted by: Axeman at May 13, 2026 05:29 PM (Fi81e)

258 How is rap analogous to ancient greek poetry?

Posted by: Chuck Martel at May 13, 2026 05:29 PM (wUvwL)

259 Good looking
Tall
Buff
Blonde
And dripping arrogance.
Posted by: 18-1 at May 13, 2026 05:27 PM (sKqQm)

So Chris Hemsworth?

Posted by: SpeakingOf at May 13, 2026 05:30 PM (6ydKt)

260
Bye, Buddy! Hope you find your Dad!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at May 13, 2026 05:30 PM (6NHCw)

261 Axeman and I are on the same wavelength today.

Posted by: SpeakingOf at May 13, 2026 05:31 PM (6ydKt)

262
How is rap analogous to ancient greek poetry?
Posted by: Chuck Martel

Butt stuff. This is known.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at May 13, 2026 05:31 PM (6NHCw)

263 Nood.

Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, the Housekeeper at May 13, 2026 05:31 PM (U/s6V)

264 248 The Return, I thought was interesting where Odysseus is broken and suffering from PTSD from the journey when he returns home.
Posted by: Patrick From Ohi

--
Yeah
I would have hated it as blesk and dreary when I was younger but as a 29+ er I appreciated that adaptation.

Posted by: vmom deport deport deport at May 13, 2026 05:32 PM (07SM3)

265 Kemp’s a RINO. I expect his move to be so awful as to discredit the entire process of redistricting.

Posted by: Accomack at May 13, 2026 05:32 PM (8jVAy)

266 140 We enjoyed Project Hail Mary, which makes 2 fun movies I’ve seen in theaters in the last 10 years, the other being Top Gun Maverick.

I grew up loving movies but I’m not sure it’s worth caring about anymore.
Posted by: Jack Squat Bupkis at May 13, 2026 04:59 PM (GD2xa)

Finally a Movie I can take my son to. I love this movie so much, really want a sequel on Rocky and Grace, it was just soo good

Posted by: Patrick From Ohio at May 13, 2026 05:32 PM (ubCxQ)

267 Oh, THERE'S a movie I'm going to cheerfully skip. I might go see the Sheep Detectives though.

Posted by: Nancy@7000ft at May 13, 2026 05:33 PM (4qIhJ)

268 This has nothing to do with the thread, but I feel it necessary to comment on after skipping around in YouTube looking for information on this film.

We live in a world of parasitic retards. There have to be thousands of YouTube commenters whose singular purpose is to...."react" to something that someone else accomplished. I don't know what's more disturbing. The fact that people seem to have made a career out of this, or that a wealth of other individuals somehow give it value. People eating cupcakes, people reacting to movies (not critiquing...but, reacting), people reacting to music (not critiquing....reacting). There is no credibility, expertise, or objective value. Just some lump eating a bag of chips (eating into a microphone is gross in the first place) and responding with something like. "Oh, I like these." What service, vocation, or value is being provide. You leave knowing the lump liked the chips. Stop the world. I want to get off.

Posted by: Orson at May 13, 2026 05:33 PM (dIske)

269 248 The Return, I thought was interesting where Odysseus is broken and suffering from PTSD from the journey when he returns home.
Posted by: Patrick From Ohi

--
Yeah
I would have hated it as blesk and dreary when I was younger but as a 29+ er I appreciated that adaptation.
Posted by: vmom deport deport deport at May 13, 2026 05:32 PM (07SM3)

The 7-9 years spent on an island with a sorceress might have led to some recovery.

Posted by: Oldcat at May 13, 2026 05:33 PM (8avO+)

270 Movie thread - I watched the dvd of Dracula: A Love Tale
It's not horror, more of a mannered satire. Fun in its own way.

Posted by: vmom deport deport deport at May 13, 2026 05:34 PM (07SM3)

271 How sad and predictable.

Every story is going to be retold with Zendaya as the lead, eh?

And I think I read that her fey husband is in it as well. He exudes masculinity , you guys!

Posted by: Lizzy at May 13, 2026 05:35 PM (K00qy)

272 Okay Elon, time to step up. You've got more money than anybody, finance a decent version of the Odyssey. Come on, you know you want to. Don't leave out the archery scene near the end.

Posted by: Nancy@7000ft at May 13, 2026 05:36 PM (4qIhJ)

273 There are classic rap songs that have been handed down for twenty years! Just like ancient Greek literature.
Posted by: t-bird at May 13, 2026 05:18 PM (E/qck)

"Sometimes it makes me wonder
How I keep from going under."

- Lil Ulysses rapping to the Sirens while lashed to the mast of his ship.

Posted by: Africa Bambata. Word at May 13, 2026 05:37 PM (47/pr)

274 My favorite part of The Odyssey is when Odysseus got nicked by an arrow and Eurylochus says, "You're bleedin man!" Then Odysseus replied, " I aint got time to bleed!"

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at May 13, 2026 05:38 PM (cWLG3)

275 Ironically Ellen Page would be a natural as an Amazon.

Posted by: Minuteman at May 13, 2026 05:42 PM (47/pr)

276 5. Woman are made more prominent & impactful at the expense of male characters.

Let's see - the reason Odysseus is on this Odyssey at all is because Hera is pissed at him. The reason it took him 20 years to get home was because Circe held him captive for that long. The reason behind his arrival to Ithaca was because of the Phoenician princess' aide. The only reason he got home at all was because Athena liked him.

Sheesh - the whole story revolves around prominent & impactful women.

Posted by: LCMS Rulz! at May 13, 2026 05:44 PM (bufu1)

277 Lupita Nyong'o

Sound effects are taking actors' roles? Fookin' AI!
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at May 13, 2026 05:22 PM (6NHCw

We are no longer the knights who say "Nee!!" We are now the knights who say "Lupita Nyong'o!"

Posted by: The Knights who formerly said "Nee!!" at May 13, 2026 05:46 PM (47/pr)

278 30 MATT DAMON!
Posted by: MATT DAMON!

They guaranteed my non-attendance by this bit of casting alone.

Hollywood is suicidal, along with the rest of the left.

Posted by: Auspex at May 13, 2026 05:50 PM (Y8DZL)

279 He needs Ellen Page to explain the part of the movie where he engages in time travel in a dream.

Posted by: MikeN at May 13, 2026 05:51 PM (9AF3K)

280 Sheesh - the whole story revolves around prominent & impactful women.
Posted by: LCMS Rulz!

Goddesses. But the point is well made, the original was about the deities messing with humans, which was what Greek mythology was all about.

Posted by: Auspex at May 13, 2026 05:55 PM (Y8DZL)

281 Ancient Greek idols depicted the gods and goddesses as blonde. I wonder if Nolan knows that?

Posted by: Avi at May 13, 2026 05:59 PM (ieodf)

282 Every single person mentioned in this post, involved with this film, is a one-eye cultist illuminati Satanist.

Why even consider watching it.

Posted by: Taq, Rickrolled by Jesus at May 13, 2026 05:59 PM (IhL8c)

283 Even the way 5th c. B.C. Greeks don’t follow Homer. Homer describes helmets made of boars’ tusks not bronze.

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at May 13, 2026 06:01 PM (ZVgZ4)

284 Cretans from up in the hills are still blonde, to this very day. The darker more Mediterrranean Greek is an admixture from elsewhere.

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at May 13, 2026 06:03 PM (ZVgZ4)

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