Tuesday Overnight Open Thread - May 12, 2026 [Doof]

Greetings Hordelings! The Tuesday ONT is here, and so are you. Open thread, as always. Come on in!

***

Tuesday night humor

While golfing, a guy accidentally overturns his golf cart in a tremendous crash.

A very attractive female golfer, who lives in a townhome overlooking the golf course, hears the crash and calls out, "Are you okay?"

"I'm okay, thanks," says the guy, as he pulls himself from the twisted golf cart wreck.

She says, "Come up to my home, you can recover for a bit, and I'll help you with the golf cart up later."

Even being a bit dizzy, the guy couldn’t help but notice that her bathrobe was partially open, revealing what appeared to be an amazing figure.

"That's mighty nice of you," he answers, "but I really don't think my wife would approve"

"Oh, come on now." she insists.

She was so pretty, so very persuasive, and the guy was so relatively dazed!

"Well okay, but I'm quite sure my wife won't be happy with me"

After a couple of gin and tonics, he thanks her and says, "I feel a lot better, and know that my wife is going to be really upset, so I'd best leave now."

"Don't be silly!" she said with a coquettish smile, letting her robe fall even slightly more open. "Stay for a while. She won't know a thing, we can have another drink” then she asks, by the way, “where is she, anyway?"

The guy replies, "Probably still under the cart, if I were to bet"

-----

Accuracy level is high

The mental illness of Democrats explained pic.twitter.com/vwyi9odR6M
— Karli Bonne’ 🇺🇸 (@KarluskaP) May 8, 2026

-----

Definitely not a sandwich

How to cook dozens of hotdogs at once without a grill.

Follow me for more life hacks. pic.twitter.com/vJnxzO0tdU
— Planet Of Memes (@PlanetOfMemes) May 12, 2026

-----

***

DJ Doof - SDL (Stuff Doof Likes) Edition

***

Weekly commenter stats for week of 05-10-2026

AoSHQ Commenter Statistics:
Number of posts: 84
Number of comments: 20454
Number of unique hashes: 1605

Top 10 commenters:
1 [490 comments] 'Sponge - F*ck Cancer' [69.62 posts/day]
2 [477 comments] 'TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films'
3 [344 comments] 'ShainS '
4 [297 comments] '...'
5 [275 comments] 'Bulg'
6 [274 comments] 'whig'
7 [261 comments] 'FenelonSpoke'
8 [242 comments] 'rickb223 '
9 [239 comments] '18-1'
10 [238 comments] 'Smell the Glove'

Top 10 sockpuppeteers:
1 [132 names] 'Quarter Twenty ' [18.75 unique names/day]
2 [116 names] 'Some off the cuff death metal lyrics'
3 [113 names] 'Homely Troll'
4 [43 names] 'pookysgirl, wrestling Lil Pooky for the keyboard'
5 [41 names] 'Count de Monet'
6 [38 names] 'mikeski'
7 [35 names] 'Duncanthrax'
8 [33 names] 'mindful webworker - mountaining'
9 [29 names] 'mindful webworker - gosh darn'
10 [28 names] 'fd'

***

Tonight's ONT brought to you by the Macho Man

***

Your feedback may or may not be very important to Doof Enterprises. Follow Mr. Doof on X @doof2112 or do the email thing – doof2112 at proton dot me.

Posted by: Open Blogger at 10:14 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 That one mitten is giving someone the middle finger.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 12, 2026 10:14 PM (1Ff7Z)

2 1st?

Posted by: davidt at May 12, 2026 10:15 PM (Q+gd/)

3 nope

Posted by: davidt at May 12, 2026 10:15 PM (Q+gd/)

4
Yay!

Thank you Doof.

Posted by: four seasons at May 12, 2026 10:15 PM (3ek7K)

5
*sets lit cigar on end table*

Good evening, Hordians.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 12, 2026 10:16 PM (HdYcL)

6 Hey, Food.

Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 10:16 PM (77rzZ)

7 Sorry for being annoying, Doof!

Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2026 10:16 PM (Wmg4n)

8 Tuesday night humor

Hah!

I didn't see that coming.

Posted by: mikeski at May 12, 2026 10:18 PM (VHUov)

9 Hey, Food.
Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 10:16 PM (77rzZ)

What happened to your nic?

Posted by: Doof at May 12, 2026 10:18 PM (QMAsf)

10 We could try the hotdog thing right before my dishwasher is replaced. Except no one here will eat them. 🤣

Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2026 10:18 PM (OoFl2)

11
Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2026 10:16 PM (Wmg4n)

__________

*embarrassed cough*

Are Soup and Saijo two different dogs or different names for the same one? I can't even keep our own dogs' names straight.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 12, 2026 10:18 PM (HdYcL)

12 Was he sponsored by Goodyear?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 12, 2026 10:18 PM (Cqx++)

13 Top Pic: There is always a tailgater, even with miles of open highway.

Posted by: Joemarine at May 12, 2026 10:18 PM (y171U)

14 Sorry for being annoying, Doof!
Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2026 10:16 PM (Wmg4n)

Checking on me is definitely not annoying!

Posted by: Doof at May 12, 2026 10:18 PM (QMAsf)

15 How to cook dozens of hotdogs at once without a grill.

Still more appetizing than gas-station roller dogs.

Posted by: mikeski at May 12, 2026 10:19 PM (VHUov)

16 Yay!

Thank you Doof.
Posted by: four seasons at May 12, 2026 10:15 PM (3ek7K)

You're welcome

Posted by: Doof at May 12, 2026 10:19 PM (QMAsf)

17 Good evening good people.

Posted by: Tonypete at May 12, 2026 10:19 PM (Kyh8Y)

18 *embarrassed cough*

Are Soup and Saijo two different dogs or different names for the same one? I can't even keep our own dogs' names straight.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 12, 2026 10:18 PM (HdYcL)

They are the same dog. Anna Puma gave him the nickname Soup because I wanted to name him Miso. So he is Saijo “Soup” Shiba (insert last name here).

Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2026 10:21 PM (OoFl2)

19 Was he sponsored by Goodyear?
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 12, 2026 10:18 PM (Cqx++)

Oo Yea!

Posted by: Macho Man, whose catchphrase was always Oo Yea! at May 12, 2026 10:21 PM (1Ff7Z)

20 Good evening Tonypete anyway!

Posted by: gKWVE at May 12, 2026 10:21 PM (gKWVE)

21 Love the macho man. Ooohhhh yeah!

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:22 PM (YZ0Fo)

22 Put it on the ash tray, not my end table, please.

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at May 12, 2026 10:22 PM (ZVgZ4)

23 Hey, Food.
Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 10:16 PM (77rzZ)

What happened to your nic?
Posted by: Doof at May 12, 2026 10:18 PM (QMAsf)

He's very clearly Aztec.

Posted by: I used to have a different nic at May 12, 2026 10:22 PM (ExV1e)

24 Good evening morons ותודה דיסקו!

Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 12, 2026 10:22 PM (RIvkX)

25 RIP Donald "Ogre" Gibb.

Posted by: NEEEERRRRDDDS at May 12, 2026 10:22 PM (gKWVE)

26 Evenin'

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 12, 2026 10:23 PM (sAmhv)

27 9 I decided, based on discussion in an earlier thread, that I really liked the Nahuatl word ending “-tl.” I’ll probably remove it at some point, and go back to the old nick, but for now I’m rolling with it.

Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 10:23 PM (77rzZ)

28 Still more appetizing than gas-station roller dogs.
Posted by: mikeski

It's no accident of naming that Sheetz has roller dogs.

Circle K and Quick Trip (QT) have pretty good ones honestly. Nice condiments too!

Posted by: Tonypete at May 12, 2026 10:23 PM (Kyh8Y)

29 You can steam fish in the dishwasher too. It actually works.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:23 PM (YZ0Fo)

30 The guy replies, "Probably still under the cart, if I were to bet"

I snorted out loud.

Posted by: toby928(c) at May 12, 2026 10:23 PM (4NO2D)

31 Hot dogs? Rinse agent is on the menu.

Posted by: Hokey Pokey at May 12, 2026 10:24 PM (YlWIZ)

32 Factory-recommended roller time for a fresh hot dog runs anywhere from 20 minutes to seven days.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at May 12, 2026 10:25 PM (JkO4W)

33 RIP Donald "Ogre" Gibb.
Posted by: NEEEERRRRDDDS at May 12, 2026 10:22 PM (gKWVE)

The football player character? Met him once. He seemed happy I knew who he was.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 12, 2026 10:25 PM (1Ff7Z)

34 If I decide to steam some hot dogs in my dishwasher, what type detergent should be used? Or could I substitute BBQ sauce or mustard?

Posted by: LRob in OK at May 12, 2026 10:25 PM (Jr+re)

35 Which cycle do you do the hotdogs on?

Just curious. Not curious enough to try it, but... still.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at May 12, 2026 10:25 PM (jehhT)

36 I snorted out loud.
Posted by: toby928(c) at May 12, 2026 10:23 PM (4NO2D)

I chuckled, the wife didn't. Maybe she didn't get the joke.

Posted by: I used to have a different nic at May 12, 2026 10:25 PM (ExV1e)

37 Circle K and Quick Trip (QT) have pretty good ones honestly. Nice condiments too!
Posted by: Tonypete at

Things are a foot at the Circle K.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:25 PM (YZ0Fo)

38 One statement in the video explaining the mental illness of the Left sums it up.

These leftist non-producers think they are smarter than anyone else.

That's one reason that for any Leftist movement they will eventually turn on each other.

Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 10:25 PM (qrzX6)

39 Top Pic: There is always a tailgater, even with miles of open highway.
Posted by: Joemarine at May 12, 2026 10:18 PM (y171U)

I'm wondering what rock makes up that pale outcrop in the middle distance? Maybe some Cretaceous or Tertiary shale deposited on the more ancient sandstones that make up the buttes?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 12, 2026 10:26 PM (95Ab8)

40 “Soup” is a great dog name.

Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 10:26 PM (77rzZ)

41 Circle K and Quick Trip (QT) have pretty good ones honestly. Nice condiments too!
Posted by: Tonypete at May 12, 2026 10:23 PM (Kyh8Y)

I never use Circle K or QT condiments. They always break. It's embarrassing when she starts swelling.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 12, 2026 10:26 PM (1Ff7Z)

42 Aaaaand, could I slice some onions and steam them in the little silverware holders?

Posted by: LRob in OK at May 12, 2026 10:26 PM (Jr+re)

43 The "Schiff is an actual Benedict Arnold Traitor" story today is still mind-blowing.

Posted by: LASue at May 12, 2026 10:26 PM (lCppi)

44 Things are a foot at the Circle K.
Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:25 PM (YZ0Fo)

-----------

And that foot, is me.

Posted by: Dean Wormer at May 12, 2026 10:26 PM (JkO4W)

45 Yay, ONT!

Posted by: Blanco Basura - Z28.310 at May 12, 2026 10:27 PM (+9wcF)

46 This was worth waiting for. Doof deserves all the accolades and brickbats we can bestow. Well-rounded, balanced, humorous, it's really ideal. The weekly Scorecard of Shame(s) is always appreciated. This will be reflected in your annual review.

Posted by: Keeping Score at May 12, 2026 10:27 PM (oftw2)

47
RIP Donald "Ogre" Gibb.
Posted by: NEEEERRRRDDDS

Was he one of the Bee Gees?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 12, 2026 10:27 PM (Cqx++)

48 You can steam fish in the dishwasher too. It actually works.
Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:23 PM (YZ0Fo)

But it doesn't scale well.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 12, 2026 10:28 PM (95Ab8)

49 Aaaaand, could I slice some onions and steam them in the little silverware holders?
Posted by: LRob in OK

You put the peppers and onions on the top rack. They stay a lil crisp that way.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:29 PM (YZ0Fo)

50 Maybe some Cretaceous or Tertiary shale deposited on the more ancient sandstones that make up the buttes?
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 12, 2026 10:26 PM (95Ab

I used to know, but can't remember much of geology class. I do know that those buttes are hard as rock. Like a girl fitness instructor.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 12, 2026 10:29 PM (1Ff7Z)

51
Sabres made a major contribution to national security by defeating Montreal 3-2 and tying the series at 2 games apiece.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 12, 2026 10:29 PM (HdYcL)

52 Does Homely Troll ever post under his/her own nic? Don't think I've ever seen it.

Posted by: LRob in OK at May 12, 2026 10:29 PM (Jr+re)

53 RIP Donald "Ogre" Gibb.
Posted by: NEEEERRRRDDDS

Noooooooooooo!!!

What if C-A-T really spelled dog?

Posted by: Dark Litigator at May 12, 2026 10:30 PM (W5mpo)

54 You can steam fish in the dishwasher too. It actually works.
Posted by: BruceWayne

But it doesn't scale well.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon

So I pulled into a Shell station
They said I'd blown a seal
I said, "Fix the damn thing
And leave my private life out of it
Okay pal?"

Posted by: Tonypete at May 12, 2026 10:30 PM (Kyh8Y)

55 NERDS!!

Posted by: toby928(c) honors Gibbs at May 12, 2026 10:30 PM (4NO2D)

56 I am off to bed, but sad I will miss the remainder of cooking in the dishwasher. 😊

Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2026 10:30 PM (OoFl2)

57 I used to know, but can't remember much of geology class. I do know that those buttes are hard as rock. Like a girl fitness instructor.

---------

Explaining the phrase, "ain't that arse a butte."

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at May 12, 2026 10:31 PM (JkO4W)

58 Or -

Looks like you've blown a seal.

Nah, it was the ice cream!

Posted by: LRob in OK at May 12, 2026 10:31 PM (Jr+re)

59
"Barnashev" sounds like a 1960s shaving cream.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 12, 2026 10:31 PM (HdYcL)

60 Which cycle do you do the hotdogs on?
Posted by: Martini Farmer

Normal cycle for regular dogs, I think.

"Pots and Pans" for bratwurst.

"China/Crystal" for Vienna sausages.

Posted by: mikeski at May 12, 2026 10:32 PM (VHUov)

61
Barbashev. Maybe I should just go to bed and try again tomorrow.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 12, 2026 10:32 PM (HdYcL)

62 "Barnashev" sounds like a 1960s shaving cream.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

And good enough used to dance at the Bolshoi Theater.

Posted by: Tonypete at May 12, 2026 10:33 PM (Kyh8Y)

63 By the way, my new, possibly temporary, nic, is to be pronounced “BULG-tull,”

Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 10:33 PM (77rzZ)

64 Good evening Horde. Thanks Disco!

Posted by: TRex - dishwasher safe dino at May 12, 2026 10:33 PM (Gk7QD)

65 You can steam fish in the dishwasher too. It actually works.
Posted by: BruceWayne

You can use it to clean the lane oil off your bowling ball, too.

Think I'll stick to washing dishes in mine.

Posted by: mikeski at May 12, 2026 10:33 PM (VHUov)

66 Thanks for the swell Tuesday Night ONT, Doof!

That joke was a hoot. Did not see that one coming!

Posted by: Legally Sufficient at May 12, 2026 10:33 PM (vrNzf)

67 RIP Frederick

Posted by: Bilwis Devourer of Innocent Souls, I'm starvin' over here at May 12, 2026 10:34 PM (w/O5Q)

68 I saw Tertiary Shale open for Mountain at Red Rocks Amphitheater in '78.

Posted by: Rockin' Mel Slirrup at May 12, 2026 10:34 PM (oftw2)

69 Think I'll stick to washing dishes in mine.
Posted by: mikeski at

Luddite

/s

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:34 PM (YZ0Fo)

70 By the way, my new, possibly temporary, nic, is to be pronounced “BULG-tull,”
Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 10:33 PM (77rzZ)

Lut-glub it is then. Thanks!

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 12, 2026 10:34 PM (95Ab8)

71 I spent 45 mins fucking around with all the sprinklers. I have it just right. No wasted water on the sidewalk. No water touching the house. All grass and plants getting covered evenly.

Ahhhhhhh. Beer time now.

Posted by: Heroq at May 12, 2026 10:35 PM (f2WBH)

72 The photo of Monument Valley is amazingly accurate, except that it is missing the tourists standing in the middle of the road as if there is no better view from there.

Looks like rain clouds on the horizon too. Must be a summer photo.

Posted by: Legally Sufficient at May 12, 2026 10:35 PM (vrNzf)

73 The "Schiff is an actual Benedict Arnold Traitor" story today is still mind-blowing.
Posted by: LASue at May 12, 2026 10:26 PM (lCppi)

They even look alike!

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at May 12, 2026 10:35 PM (qx7Zg)

74 Sleep well, Piper.

Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 10:35 PM (77rzZ)

75 I saw a pheasant on the roadside coming home from gassing the car up in town.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 12, 2026 10:36 PM (95Ab8)

76 Here's hoping President Trump out-negotiates Xi the Pooh in Peking.

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at May 12, 2026 10:36 PM (qx7Zg)

77 Sabres made a major contribution to national security by defeating Montreal 3-2 and tying the series at 2 games apiece.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

Tkachuk bros had a hilarious story on their pod today about how they were all trying to sneak beers into the village and Tage Thompson just had a case on his shoulder and put it through the X-ray machine. Said they knew they were gonna win the gold after that.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:37 PM (YZ0Fo)

78 I saw a pheasant on the roadside coming home from gassing the car up in town.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 12, 2026 10:36 PM (95Ab

Couldn't it have flown instead of driving?

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 12, 2026 10:37 PM (1Ff7Z)

79 By the way, my new, possibly temporary, nic, is to be pronounced “BULG-tull,”
Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 10:33 PM (77rzZ)

You've taken up the flute, like Ian Anderson?

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at May 12, 2026 10:37 PM (qx7Zg)

80 70 AOP, LOL.

Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 10:37 PM (77rzZ)

81 Doof -

I realize you aren't a fan but if you're wondering how some of us are and how a guitar sold for $11.5 million this is a pretty good example. Jerry had just received Tiger a couple months prior and you can tell he loved it.

I recommend turning it to 11.

https://tinyurl.com/2mj97dxk

Posted by: JackStraw at May 12, 2026 10:38 PM (viF8m)

82 Dishwashers are amazing. You can go from doing dishes, to cleaning gun and car parts, to making boiled dinner in it.

The "energy saver" function most modern dishwashers have makes it difficult to do all three in one day though... really long cycles.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 12, 2026 10:38 PM (/lPRQ)

83 75 I saw a pheasant on the roadside coming home from gassing the car up in town.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 12, 2026 10:36 PM (95Ab

The pheasant must have gotten some bad gas if he was stuck on the side of the road in his car.

Posted by: a.moron at May 12, 2026 10:38 PM (X5Jzz)

84 Enguerrand VII de Coucy
@ingelramdecoucy
EXCLUSIVE: Chilling accounts out of Israel of the IDF training sharks to come onto land to devour Palestinians in their homes, often gaining access by posing as innocuous candygram or pizza deliverers

So far I’ve got 14 sources confirming this, working to lock down more
1:22 PM · May 12, 2026
======

OMG!!

Posted by: Nicholas Kristof at May 12, 2026 10:39 PM (RIvkX)

85 > RIP Donald "Ogre" Gibb.
----
aw man...

Posted by: Don Blackopocat�petl at May 12, 2026 10:39 PM (ZxPkt)

86 39 I'm wondering what rock makes up that pale outcrop in the middle distance? Maybe some Cretaceous or Tertiary shale deposited on the more ancient sandstones that make up the buttes?
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 12, 2026 10:26 PM (95Ab

I travelled that road many years ago, don't remember the pale rock.

Posted by: Joemarine at May 12, 2026 10:39 PM (y171U)

87 Does Homely Troll ever post under his/her own nic? Don't think I've ever seen it.
Posted by: LRob in OK

I assume the unfamiliar names near the top of the sock list every week are (oftw2) and (TbWk/) , neither of whom seems to have a regular nickname. New joke sockpuppet for every comment.

I wouldn't have that kind of dedication to the bit.

*nods*

Respect.

Posted by: mikeski at May 12, 2026 10:39 PM (VHUov)

88 Cascade dish soap gives them extra flavor.

Posted by: wth at May 12, 2026 10:40 PM (oq9dX)

89 I travelled that road many years ago, don't remember the pale rock.
Posted by: Joemarine at May 12, 2026 10:39 PM (y171U)

What about his brother, Falling Rock? I keep seeing signs telling me to watch for him.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 12, 2026 10:40 PM (1Ff7Z)

90 photo at top is odd

Posted by: Don Black at May 12, 2026 10:40 PM (ZxPkt)

91 Enguerrand VII de Coucy
@ingelramdecoucy
EXCLUSIVE: Chilling accounts out of Israel of the IDF training sharks to come onto land to devour Palestinians in their homes, often gaining access by posing as innocuous candygram or pizza deliverers

So far I’ve got 14 sources confirming this, working to lock down more
1:22 PM · May 12, 2026
======

OMG!!
Posted by: Nicholas Kristof

But did they have fricken lasers on their fricken heads?

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:41 PM (YZ0Fo)

92 I spent 45 mins fucking around with all the sprinklers. I have it just right. No wasted water on the sidewalk. No water touching the house. All grass and plants getting covered evenly.

Ahhhhhhh. Beer time now.

Posted by: Heroq at May 12, 2026 10:35 PM (f2WBH)
====

Tee hee!

Posted by: Garden Gremlins and their henchmen, the Raccoons at May 12, 2026 10:41 PM (RIvkX)

93 Hello everyone. Hope you all had a great Tuesday.

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at May 12, 2026 10:41 PM (CHHv1)

94 Cascade dish soap gives them extra flavor.

But does it keep the filter clean?

(Been watching way too much TV lately.)

Posted by: LRob in OK at May 12, 2026 10:41 PM (Jr+re)

95 84 Enguerrand VII de Coucy
@ingelramdecoucy
EXCLUSIVE: Chilling accounts out of Israel of the IDF training sharks to come onto land to devour Palestinians in their homes, often gaining access by posing as innocuous candygram or pizza deliverers

So far I’ve got 14 sources confirming this, working to lock down more
1:22 PM · May 12, 2026
======

OMG!!

Posted by: Nicholas Kristof at May 12, 2026 10:39 PM (RIvkX)

Does this mean the Jooo weather machine creates Sharknados?

Posted by: a.moron at May 12, 2026 10:41 PM (X5Jzz)

96 Dishwashers are amazing. You can go from doing dishes, to cleaning gun and car parts, to making boiled dinner in it.

The "energy saver" function most modern dishwashers have makes it difficult to do all three in one day though... really long cycles.
Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher

Low and slow. 👍

Posted by: mikeski at May 12, 2026 10:41 PM (VHUov)

97 JET COVER-UP China KNEW pilot deliberately crashed Boeing 737 into mountain at 350mph killing 132 for four years, US probe reveals
https://t.co/i4M3Fq9VhP
China Eastern Airlines Flight 5735 smashed into a mountain at 350mph in Guangxi after the captain intentionally brought down the aircraft, newly surfaced data reveals.
Chinese authorities have known for four years that a pilot deliberately crashed, US authorities claim...took place after one of the three airmen on board shut down both engines & turned off auto-pilot...
Suppressive Chinese authorities claimed last year that releasing information related to the disaster could “endanger national security & social stability”.
...Intentionally crashing has proved to be one of the leading causes of plane disasters in recent years, reports say. It was the second most common cause of plane deaths from 2011 to 2020, Bloomberg reported.

Posted by: BetaCuck4Lyfe at May 12, 2026 10:41 PM (9aVck)

98 Doof, if someone has put together the content for an ONT, who should it get sent to?

I have one that could be used as a filler for most weekdays. You know, when life gets really busy and the content search time isn't there.

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at May 12, 2026 10:42 PM (qx7Zg)

99 Does Cascade come in different flavors?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 12, 2026 10:42 PM (Cqx++)

100 Low and slow. 👍
Posted by: mikeski at

That is the tempo.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:42 PM (YZ0Fo)

101 Does Cascade come in different flavors?
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr.

Just regular and lemon, I think.

Posted by: mikeski at May 12, 2026 10:43 PM (VHUov)

102 *Puts on hat*

Posted by: Perry the Platapus at May 12, 2026 10:44 PM (+0Wk3)

103 Speaking of spies, that Chinese mayor who admitted to spying? Behold the power of filters.

What you think she looks like:

https://tinyurl.com/4zz5kfbz

What she really looks like:

https://tinyurl.com/bdefeuy5

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 12, 2026 10:44 PM (1Ff7Z)

104 Top pic could be a 1500 piece jigsaw puzzle.

Posted by: Count de Monetl at May 12, 2026 10:44 PM (wVcYX)

105 So I pulled into a Shell station
They said I'd blown a seal
I said, "Fix the damn thing
And leave my private life out of it
Okay pal?"
Posted by: Tonypete

I wouldn't tell people about that. PETA is going to come after you for animal abuse.

Posted by: nerdygirl at May 12, 2026 10:44 PM (0Htd1)

106 Just don't put the buns in there too.

Posted by: wth at May 12, 2026 10:45 PM (oq9dX)

107 Now this is a really good gag that's been running for 50+ years on approach to Milwaukee's airport.

https://youtu.be/eKlOY5wPS9U

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at May 12, 2026 10:46 PM (qx7Zg)

108 Doof -

I realize you aren't a fan but if you're wondering how some of us are and how a guitar sold for $11.5 million this is a pretty good example. Jerry had just received Tiger a couple months prior and you can tell he loved it.

I recommend turning it to 11.

https://tinyurl.com/2mj97dxk
Posted by: JackStraw at May 12, 2026 10:38 PM (viF8m)

I will certainly give it an open minded listen!

Posted by: Doof at May 12, 2026 10:46 PM (QMAsf)

109 photo at top is odd
Posted by: Don Black

It's actually uphill all the way as far as you can see.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 12, 2026 10:47 PM (/lPRQ)

110 Dishwashers are amazing.

They prefer to be called ladies.

Show some respect.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at May 12, 2026 10:47 PM (s522d)

111 Triumph! They had a string of great albums in the late 70s & into the 80s. Emmet had a hell of a voice. Great band.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 12, 2026 10:47 PM (sAmhv)

112
Grilled hotdogs are the best.

Leftovers, chop up the weiners and make beanie weinies.

Posted by: four seasons at May 12, 2026 10:48 PM (3ek7K)

113 hypothetically speaking, if US is to kinetically negotiate with Iran upon Trump's return from Chi-na.....does "Operation Sledgehammer" for such an effort sound cool, or what ?

Posted by: runner at May 12, 2026 10:48 PM (GD0B3)

114 Dishwashers are amazing.

They prefer to be called ladies.

Show some respect.
Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls

Reminds me of a joke

Why are wedding dresses white?

So she'll match the other appliances.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:48 PM (YZ0Fo)

115 Where is Forest Gump in that photo?

Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 10:48 PM (qrzX6)

116 Ring-necked Pheasants are non-native, or invasive, if you will. First brought from Asia around 1880 for hunting. They are very successful and are the State Bird of South Dakota. The place I saw the most pheasants at once was Riverdale in the Bronx in several parks with a lot of underbrush leading down to the Hudson. I'd walk a neighbors dog and she would flush out sometimes 8 or 9 per walk. They would skitter through the brush until the doggie got close.

Posted by: Pheasant Dreams at May 12, 2026 10:48 PM (oftw2)

117 Doof, if someone has put together the content for an ONT, who should it get sent to?

I have one that could be used as a filler for most weekdays. You know, when life gets really busy and the content search time isn't there.
Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at May 12, 2026 10:42 PM (qx7Zg)

You can send it to me at the email I list at the end of every ONT. I'll make sure it gets to the proper authorities!

Posted by: Doof at May 12, 2026 10:48 PM (QMAsf)

118 100 Low and slow. 👍
Posted by: mikeski at

That is the tempo.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:42 PM
***
I suppose now you're going to tell me that White Castle fries only come in one size.

Posted by: TRex - MC dino at May 12, 2026 10:50 PM (Gk7QD)

119 Every hotdog I've made in the last decade have been in the microwave.

Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 10:50 PM (qrzX6)

120 ...Intentionally crashing has proved to be one of the leading causes of plane disasters in recent years, reports say. It was the second most common cause of plane deaths from 2011 to 2020, Bloomberg reported.
Posted by: BetaCuck4Lyfe

===

They could go back to 2001, or earlier and have ever more profound results.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 12, 2026 10:51 PM (/lPRQ)

121 100 Low and slow. 👍
Posted by: mikeski at

That is the tempo.
Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:42 PM (YZ0Fo)

*Looks through Beastie Boys albums*

Posted by: Perry the Platapus at May 12, 2026 10:51 PM (+0Wk3)

122
Speaking of spies, that Chinese mayor who admitted to spying? Behold the power of filters.

What you think she looks like:

____________

https://tinyurl.com/mpjn2cak

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 12, 2026 10:51 PM (HdYcL)

123 US is to kinetically negotiate with Iran upon Trump's return from Chi-na.....does "Operation Sledgehammer" for such an effort sound cool, or what ?
Posted by: runner at May 12, 2026 10:48 PM (GD0B3)

Trust him, he knows what he's doing.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 12, 2026 10:51 PM (1Ff7Z)

124 I chuckled, the wife didn't. Maybe she didn't get the joke.

Posted by: I used to have a different nic at May 12, 2026 10:25 PM (ExV1e)
--------
Same here.

Posted by: 496 at May 12, 2026 10:51 PM (sOtuf)

125 Top 10 sockpuppeteers…
8 [33 names] 'mindful webworker - mountaining'
9 [29 names] 'mindful webworker - gosh darn'

Well, this is odd. Someone else using my nic! Which one am I?? It's a virtual existential delemmer.

Butt serially, if you add 'em up, I'd be up at #4. Which I think may be as high up on the sockpuppet list as I've ever registered.

The program that counts nics obviously has a bug. But understandable, as it might be hard to differentiate names v just adding up hashtags.

Mostly, though, the program owes an apology to whomever was #11.

Posted by: mindful webworker - but, who's counting, eh? at May 12, 2026 10:51 PM (tlr+e)

126 You can steam fish in the dishwasher too. It actually works.
Posted by: BruceWayne

You can use it to clean the lane oil off your bowling ball, too.

Think I'll stick to washing dishes in mine.
Posted by: mikeski at May 12, 2026 10:33 PM (VHUov)

Clean your dishwasher-safe sex toys too, I'm led to understand.

Posted by: Count de Monetl at May 12, 2026 10:52 PM (wVcYX)

127 Does this mean the Jooo weather machine creates Sharknados?
Posted by: a.moron at May 12, 2026 10:41 PM (X5Jzz)
=====

TBH there may or may not be weather machines.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 12, 2026 10:52 PM (RIvkX)

128 Speaking of spies, that Chinese mayor who admitted to spying? Behold the power of filters.

What you think she looks like:
https://tinyurl.com/4zz5kfbz
What she really looks like:
https://tinyurl.com/bdefeuy5
Posted by: OrangeEnt
===

It's like computerized Beer Goggles.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 12, 2026 10:53 PM (/lPRQ)

129
I chuckled, the wife didn't. Maybe she didn't get the joke.

__________

Her Majesty would clang a cast-iron frying pan off my cranium.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 12, 2026 10:53 PM (HdYcL)

130 75 I saw a pheasant on the roadside coming home from gassing the car up in town.

And how the pheasant gassed the car up I'll never know

Posted by: Groucho Azjaeger at May 12, 2026 10:53 PM (3/XaG)

131 111 Triumph! They had a string of great albums in the late 70s & into...
---

Fast motorcycles too.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at May 12, 2026 10:53 PM (nBZd4)

132 100 Low and slow. 👍
Posted by: mikeski at

That's what she said

Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 10:54 PM (qrzX6)

133 Clean your dishwasher-safe sex toys too, I'm led to understand.
Posted by: Count de Monet

The ones that plug in doesn't work so well.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:54 PM (YZ0Fo)

134 >>> 125
==
Mostly, though, the program owes an apology to whomever was #11.
Posted by: mindful webworker - but, who's counting, eh? at May 12, 2026 10:51 PM (tlr+e)

What's wrong with 11?

Posted by: Nigel Tufnel at May 12, 2026 10:54 PM (Ra+Eb)

135 It's like computerized Beer Goggles.
Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 12, 2026 10:53 PM (/lPRQ)

And she certainly doesn't look like what Hadrian posted!

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 12, 2026 10:54 PM (1Ff7Z)

136 Every hotdog I've made in the last decade have been in the microwave.
Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 10:50 PM (qrzX6)
====
Do you live in North Korea?

Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 12, 2026 10:56 PM (RIvkX)

137 If I decide to steam some hot dogs in my dishwasher, what type detergent should be used?
Posted by: LRob in OK

Be sure to add that rinse stuff that leaves wieners spotless.

Posted by: mindful webworker - follow for more dangerous suggestions at May 12, 2026 10:57 PM (tlr+e)

138 .131 111 Triumph! They had a string of great albums in the late 70s & into...
---

Fast motorcycles too.

And a good run as a TV insult dog puppet comic

Posted by: Groucho Azjaeger at May 12, 2026 10:57 PM (3/XaG)

139 Clean your dishwasher-safe sex toys too, I'm led to understand.
Posted by: Count de Monet

The ones that plug in doesn't work so well.
Posted by: BruceWayne

I haven't done any market research but sex toys unsafe in wet locations is prolly asking for a lawsuit.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 12, 2026 10:57 PM (/lPRQ)

140
Spotted dick is dangerous.

Posted by: four seasons at May 12, 2026 10:57 PM (3ek7K)

141 I've never listened to Rage Against the Machine but I guess one of their guys was featured at an anti-ICE protest in NYC.

Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 10:58 PM (qrzX6)

142 Triumph! They had a string of great albums in the late 70s & into...
---

Fast motorcycles too.

Posted by: Braenyard
------

I find my R/S 955 very satisfactory.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at May 12, 2026 10:58 PM (XeU6L)

143 Former congresswoman and unattractive female ditches USA for Costa Rica and tries to act like her bete noir, President Trump, but just seems a pathetic name caller.

https://tinyurl.com/mrm6tbbf

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 12, 2026 10:58 PM (1Ff7Z)

144
So do you put them in the top rack? Or on end in the utensil basket?

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 12, 2026 10:58 PM (HdYcL)

145 I think Triumph is actually out there playing again.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at May 12, 2026 10:59 PM (snZF9)

146 "They can be catastrophically wrong, but still keep their careers."

That is a great line summing up leftist "thinkers."

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Not Exactly Streets Ahead at May 12, 2026 10:59 PM (0aYVJ)

147 I've never listened to Rage Against the Machine but I guess one of their guys was featured at an anti-ICE protest in NYC.
Posted by: Harry Vandenburg

They are forever to be known as Rage for the Machine

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:59 PM (YZ0Fo)

148 You can warm the buns in the clothes dryer.

Posted by: wth at May 12, 2026 10:59 PM (oq9dX)

149
Hadrian,

Women know where to put them.

Posted by: four seasons at May 12, 2026 10:59 PM (3ek7K)

150 Posted by: Bulgtl
Posted by: Don Blackopocat�petl
Posted by: Count de Monetl

I'm feeling left out.

But now my name looks like mike-skittle. I don't even like Skittles that much.

Posted by: mikeskitl at May 12, 2026 10:59 PM (VHUov)

151 Do you live in North Korea?
Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 12, 2026 10:56 PM (

If I did I would be a king. They wish they had hot dogs.

Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 11:00 PM (qrzX6)

152 An old friend of mine, now deceased, was always a 4-H kind of guy, even though we grew up in northern suburbs of NYC. He had an incubator and was always hatching weird foul, ducks, geese, guinea fowl, etc. He also hatched and kept Golden Pheasants and had a bunch of them. We released about 20 of them in a couple hundred acre park with a swamp, lake, grasslands. It became a thriving community.
There are many feral tribes of these birds all over the US, most escapes, though many from other nuts like my friend John. They are a striking looking bird.

Posted by: RIP John Capuano 1957-2010 at May 12, 2026 11:00 PM (oftw2)

153 So do you put them in the top rack? Or on end in the utensil basket?
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

Woulda assume it depends on the size.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:00 PM (YZ0Fo)

154 They may keep their careers but they would lose their heads pretty fast should their compatriots ever have enough power.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 12, 2026 11:00 PM (RIvkX)

155 The 4 Corners area is spectacular and unique, with the possible exception of Mars.

Fiendishly hot in the summer months tho. I’ve always been appreciative of Injuns and settlers and pioneers who scratched out a living in such inhospitable places without benefit of modern technology and creature comforts and the rest of it. They were tough SOBs, they had to be.

Posted by: Common Tater at May 12, 2026 11:01 PM (/4VRy)

156 141 I've never listened to Rage Against the Machine but I guess one of their guys was featured at an anti-ICE protest in NYC.
Posted by: Harry Vandenburg

Rage For the Machine.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 12, 2026 11:01 PM (sAmhv)

157 119 Every hotdog I've made in the last decade have been in the microwave.
Posted by: Harry Vandenburg

I also do corn on the cob in the microwave. Grilling or boiling corn on the cob is too much bother for one cob.

Posted by: nerdygirl at May 12, 2026 11:02 PM (0Htd1)

158 I guess I'd better pick up some hot dogs next trip to grocery store . . . . . the things I learn here!

Posted by: LRob in OK at May 12, 2026 11:03 PM (Jr+re)

159 Damn, now I want a hot dog. With mustard.

Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 11:03 PM (77rzZ)

160 also do corn on the cob in the microwave. Grilling or boiling corn on the cob is too much bother for one cob.
Posted by: nerdygirl at

Air fryer.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:03 PM (YZ0Fo)

161 I've never listened to Rage Against the Machine but I guess one of their guys was featured at an anti-ICE protest in NYC.
Posted by: Harry Vandenburg

They are forever to be known as Rage for the Machine

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:59 PM (YZ0Fo)

I don't listen to those jerkoffs. Probably wouldn't recognize a single song.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at May 12, 2026 11:03 PM (snZF9)

162 You can send it to me at the email I list at the end of every ONT. I'll make sure it gets to the proper authorities!
Posted by: Doof at May 12, 2026 10:48 PM (QMAsf)

I'll send it tomorrow. I'm on the wrong device right now.

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at May 12, 2026 11:03 PM (qx7Zg)

163 Top 10 sockpuppeteers…
8 [33 names] 'mindful webworker - mountaining'
9 [29 names] 'mindful webworker - gosh darn'

Well, this is odd. Someone else using my nic! Which one am I?? It's a virtual existential delemmer.

You're beside yourself!

Butt serially,

.....said Pete Bootygig.....

if you add 'em up, I'd be up at #4. Which I think may be as high up on the sockpuppet list as I've ever registered.

The program that counts nics obviously has a bug. But understandable, as it might be hard to differentiate names v just adding up hashtags.

This was discussed a while back. That is what it does; counts posts from a particular hash, and assigns the most-frequently-used nickname to it.

Mostly, though, the program owes an apology to whomever was #11.
Posted by: mindful webworker

Ninth or tenth loser doesn't really matter, does it?

Posted by: mikeskitl, fifth loser at May 12, 2026 11:03 PM (VHUov)

164 >>Rage For the Machine.

Potato - Carrots

Posted by: JackStraw at May 12, 2026 11:04 PM (viF8m)

165 Microwave ovens are a wretched device. Tongue burning rubber food generator. OK for re-heating a cup of coffee.

Posted by: Common Tater at May 12, 2026 11:04 PM (/4VRy)

166 145 I think Triumph is actually out there playing again.
Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division

They are. I did a search and its there 50th anniversary so they're touring. Rick Emmet is still lead singer too. Wonder if his pipes have survived. He could belt out songs with the best of them when he was younger.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 12, 2026 11:04 PM (sAmhv)

167 Johnny Somali Update

His lawyer has quit so now the nuisance streamer has to depend upon a public defender.

Posted by: Anna Puma at May 12, 2026 11:04 PM (2GVsD)

168 You could probably cook corned beef and cabbage in the microwave, but it might take ten cycles.

Posted by: Potatoes, Too at May 12, 2026 11:05 PM (oftw2)

169 I don't listen to those jerkoffs. Probably wouldn't recognize a single song.
Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division

I'd bet you'd at least recognize killing in the name of or people of the Sun.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:05 PM (YZ0Fo)

170 ...and the manager of the pheasant ranch told the young pregnant woman, "Yes, Darren did use to work for us. He was a pheasant plucker."

"He certainly was", she sighed.

Posted by: just the punchline at May 12, 2026 11:05 PM (95Ab8)

171 The ones that plug in doesn't work so well.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:54 PM (YZ0Fo)
------
Gas-powered ones are right out!

Posted by: 496 at May 12, 2026 11:05 PM (sOtuf)

172 Reminds me of a joke

Why are wedding dresses white?

So she'll match the other appliances.
Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 10:48 PM (YZ0Fo)

Aaaaand there ended their sex life entirely.

Posted by: tcn in AK at May 12, 2026 11:05 PM (DwqWV)

173 Adding itl makes my nic sound like a pharmaceutical product.

"Take two doses of trexitl twice a day to treat short arm syndrome. Results may vary."

Posted by: Trexitl at May 12, 2026 11:06 PM (Gk7QD)

174 Hubby onced washed his baseball caps in the dishwasher, top rack.
I was so freaked out when I opened the dishwasher in the morning.

Posted by: vmom deport deport deport at May 12, 2026 11:06 PM (fE6HJ)

175 Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me
Unless you're a big government bureaucrat

Posted by: Home, home on the rage at May 12, 2026 11:06 PM (s522d)

176 Thanks Doof!
Always enjoy the musical interludes. They coax me out of my “80s rock is the best” box.
Now do Inside Out by XYZ.
They arrived very late, but were awesome. Grunge stole all of the oxygen out of the room, so they never got traction. Sad!
And “What keeps me loving you” is one of their best, and a hidden gem.

Posted by: Gunslinger at May 12, 2026 11:07 PM (HZfH/)

177 Johnny Somali Update

His lawyer has quit so now the nuisance streamer has to depend upon a public defender.
Posted by: Anna Puma

Dang, and I sent the world's smallest violin in to get re-strung.

Posted by: mikeskitl at May 12, 2026 11:07 PM (VHUov)

178 Fuck you I won't do what you tell me
Fuck you, do what I tell you

Posted by: Rage 'against' the Machine at May 12, 2026 11:08 PM (gKWVE)

179 Hubby onced washed his baseball caps in the dishwasher, top rack.
I was so freaked out when I opened the dishwasher in the morning.
Posted by: vmom deport deport deport

I tried that in hs. It ruins the hats. Just wear em dirty til they disintegrate.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:08 PM (YZ0Fo)

180 Hubby onced washed his baseball caps in the dishwasher, top rack.
I was so freaked out when I opened the dishwasher in the morning.
Posted by: vmom

"The heads shrunk so much they washed down the drain?!?"

Posted by: mikeskitl at May 12, 2026 11:08 PM (VHUov)

181 They were tough SOBs, they had to be.

Posted by: Common Tater at May 12, 2026 11:01 PM (/4VRy)
-------
I often wonder how the hell they did it.

Even more so, I wonder WHY they did it. If I had it that rough I think I'd just end it all

Posted by: 496 at May 12, 2026 11:08 PM (sOtuf)

182 Didn't Rage Against The Machine make COVID vaccine ads, or am I thinking of some other suck-ups?

Posted by: Potatoes, Too at May 12, 2026 11:09 PM (oftw2)

183 Back to our usual programming...

Posted by: TRex - OG dino at May 12, 2026 11:10 PM (Gk7QD)

184 One of those RATM clowns did something amazing during the last fascist, worst than Hitler GOP administration, GWBush. He was decrying Heir Bush at some news conference and on either side of him were huge pictures of Mao and Lenin. It was perfect!

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 12, 2026 11:10 PM (sAmhv)

185 Fuck you I won't do what you tell me
Fuck you, do what I tell you
Posted by: Rage 'against' the Machine

I won't work on tom loads ranch no more.
Unless the president tells me.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:10 PM (YZ0Fo)

186
73 The "Schiff is an actual Benedict Arnold Traitor" story today is still mind-blowing.
Posted by: LASue at May 12, 2026 10:26 PM (lCppi)

They even look alike!
Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at May 12, 2026 10:35 PM

---------

From all surviving accounts, Benedict Arnold was not a bug-eyed pencil neck.

Posted by: Semi-Literate Thug at May 12, 2026 11:10 PM (VWtfl)

187 I'd bet you'd at least recognize killing in the name of or people of the Sun.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:05 PM (YZ0Fo)

Probably not. I don't listen to radio.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at May 12, 2026 11:11 PM (snZF9)

188 One of those RATM clowns did something amazing during the last fascist, worst than Hitler GOP administration, GWBush. He was decrying Heir Bush at some news conference and on either side of him were huge pictures of Mao and Lenin. It was perfect!
Posted by: Puddleglum,

They were always communist nepo babies.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:11 PM (YZ0Fo)

189 Just pulled up some Rage Against the Machine songs. Are they a Beastie Boys cover band?

Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 11:11 PM (qrzX6)

190 Meteorologist
Economist
Politicians
Teachers

They are allowed to be wrong for
EVER
Missed that storm
Kids cannot read
Road to nowhere

We will do better next time

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Posted by: r hennigantx at May 12, 2026 11:11 PM (/+uur)

191 Thanks Doof!
Always enjoy the musical interludes. They coax me out of my “80s rock is the best” box.
Now do Inside Out by XYZ.
They arrived very late, but were awesome. Grunge stole all of the oxygen out of the room, so they never got traction. Sad!
And “What keeps me loving you” is one of their best, and a hidden gem.
Posted by: Gunslinger at May 12, 2026 11:07 PM (HZfH/)

I will check out XYZ. Thanks!

Posted by: Doof at May 12, 2026 11:12 PM (QMAsf)

192 [First day as a museum tour guide]
Kid: how can we tell how old a dinosaur is
Me: you must first ask yourself, "does that dinosaur have 3 butts?"
Kid: umm no
Me: then we can rule out the Triassic Period

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at May 12, 2026 11:12 PM (qx7Zg)

193 Air fryer.
Posted by: BruceWayne

Oh, yeah. That's that thing sitting on my counter.

Posted by: nerdygirl at May 12, 2026 11:12 PM (0Htd1)

194 Just pulled up some Rage Against the Machine songs. Are they a Beastie Boys cover band?
Posted by: Harry Vandenburg

No they were mid 90s "metal" commie nepo babies.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:13 PM (YZ0Fo)

195 Oh, yeah. That's that thing sitting on my counter.
Posted by: nerdygirl

Do it. Like 6-8 min comes out perfect.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:13 PM (YZ0Fo)

196 Tom Morello is an insufferable marxist a***ole and wildly overrated.

Posted by: Thomas Bender at May 12, 2026 11:13 PM (XV/Pl)

197 182 Didn't Rage Against The Machine make COVID vaccine ads, or am I thinking of some other suck-ups?
Posted by: Potatoes, Too at May 12, 2026 11:09 PM (oftw2)

They would not allow people in without the card and mask

Dues es machina

Posted by: r hennigantx at May 12, 2026 11:14 PM (/+uur)

198 Hubby onced washed his baseball caps in the dishwasher, top rack.
I was so freaked out when I opened the dishwasher in the morning.
Posted by: vmom deport deport deport

I tried that in hs. It ruins the hats. Just wear em dirty til they disintegrate.
Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:08 PM (YZ0Fo)

Take an old toothbrush and some laundry detergent to it under the shower. Let it air dry on the faucet handle for several hours / overnight. Do it BEFORE seeing any sweat rings.

Posted by: Doof at May 12, 2026 11:14 PM (QMAsf)

199 Just pulled up some Rage Against the Machine songs. Are they a Beastie Boys cover band?
Posted by: Harry Vandenburg

No they were mid 90s "metal" commie nepo babies.
Posted by: BruceWayne

They then broke up and the entire group teamed up with Chris Cornell to make audioslave. Who made some great music.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:15 PM (YZ0Fo)

200 From all surviving accounts, Benedict Arnold was not a bug-eyed pencil neck.
Posted by: Semi-Literate Thug

Neither did he have a cock-shaped mouf, nor give off the vibe of a pedo.

Posted by: Drink Like Vikings at May 12, 2026 11:15 PM (vRHNu)

201 Why would anyone wash headgear? Hats and caps are supposed to get worn and weathered.

Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 11:15 PM (77rzZ)

202 Take an old toothbrush and some laundry detergent to it under the shower. Let it air dry on the faucet handle for several hours / overnight. Do it BEFORE seeing any sweat rings.
Posted by: Doof at

But then what's the point if the hat doesn't have swear rings?

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:16 PM (YZ0Fo)

203 Hubby onced washed his baseball caps in the dishwasher, top rack.
I was so freaked out when I opened the dishwasher in the morning.
Posted by: vmom deport deport deport at May 12, 2026 11:06 PM (fE6HJ)

It's an old Arizona trick, tho' I've heard of people doing it as far north as Nebraska.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at May 12, 2026 11:16 PM (1Ff7Z)

204 Not a rap fan but Beastie Boys 'Sabotage' is a great song! Probably the only rap I like. The music video is perfect. They all looked like they were having fun spoofing early 70s cop movies.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 12, 2026 11:16 PM (sAmhv)

205 >>Hubby onced washed his baseball caps in the dishwasher, top rack.
I was so freaked out when I opened the dishwasher in the morning.

I'm a bit freaked out just reading that. Run them under a hot tap with some soap.

They aren't a biohazard.

Posted by: JackStraw at May 12, 2026 11:17 PM (viF8m)

206 I wash my caps with a hose outside and hang them on hooks to dry. I must have at least 30 caps I rotate to wear for tennis and golf.

Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 11:18 PM (qrzX6)

207 I'm a bit freaked out just reading that. Run them under a hot tap with some soap.

They aren't a biohazard.
Posted by: JackStraw

In the mid late 90s the made hat savers that you used to was them in the dishwasher. It turned out awful.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:18 PM (YZ0Fo)

208
I'm getting in on the Aztec fun.

Posted by: Blonde Mortixtl at May 12, 2026 11:18 PM (XJ22o)

209 Take an old toothbrush and some laundry detergent to it under the shower. Let it air dry on the faucet handle for several hours / overnight. Do it BEFORE seeing any sweat rings.
Posted by: Doof at May 12, 2026 11:14 PM (QMAsf)

I threw a very dirty ball cap into the washer. Turned out fine, but some of the interlining of the sweat band disintegrated. I'm thinking a line of hot glue will fix it.

Posted by: just the punchline at May 12, 2026 11:19 PM (95Ab8)

210 a bit freaked out just reading that. Run them under a hot tap with some soap.

They aren't a biohazard.
Posted by: JackStraw

In the mid late 90s the made hat savers that you used to was them in the dishwasher. It turned out awful.
Posted by: BruceWayne

Also the hats I wore playing baseball would disagree.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:19 PM (YZ0Fo)

211 I suppose because they didn’t know anything else, it was all they were used to. If you carry that logic forward, people in the future will probably marvel at all the bullshit we have to put up with now.

Posted by: Common Tater at May 12, 2026 11:19 PM (/4VRy)

212
The economy is great!!

Throw away the dirty caps and buy new ones.

Follow my advice. My car has a flat tire and I'm gonna trade it in tomorrow.

Posted by: four seasons at May 12, 2026 11:19 PM (3ek7K)

213 Not a rap fan but Beastie Boys 'Sabotage' is a great song! Probably the only rap I like. The music video is perfect. They all looked like they were having fun spoofing early 70s cop movies.
Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 12, 2026 11:16 PM (sAmhv)

I was snarking of course but RATM did remind me of an angrier Beastie Boys style.

Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 11:20 PM (qrzX6)

214 208 LOL

Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 11:20 PM (77rzZ)

215
Meteorologists deserve a break, I think. They know and admit that forecasting weather is inexact and that they speak in probabilities.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 12, 2026 11:21 PM (HdYcL)

216 196 Tom Morello is an insufferable marxist a***ole and wildly overrated.
Posted by: Thomas Bender

That's the guy. He's the one who did that news conference, with Mao and Lenin portraits on either side of him, decrying McChimpyBushHitler. Again, it was perfect!

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 12, 2026 11:21 PM (sAmhv)

217 Throw away the dirty caps and buy new ones.

Follow my advice. My car has a flat tire and I'm gonna trade it in tomorrow.

Posted by: four seasons

Never you earn that dirty hat. It has stories.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:21 PM (YZ0Fo)

218 Real men wear hats, with brims. Not ballcaps.

Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 11:22 PM (77rzZ)

219 SpaceX Starship launch planned for May 19. 5:30pm CT

Posted by: TRex - orbital dino at May 12, 2026 11:23 PM (Gk7QD)

220 199:Chris Cornell could sing. He improved most bands that way.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 12, 2026 11:23 PM (sAmhv)

221
If you wash your balls in the dishwasher remember to cancel the drying cycle.

Posted by: four seasons at May 12, 2026 11:23 PM (3ek7K)

222 Decent caps ain't cheap any more.

Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 11:23 PM (qrzX6)

223 >>Also the hats I wore playing baseball would disagree.

I grew up playing baseball. And teaching diving and fishing and sailing. I've gone through a ton of hats.

It's just sweat and dirt. I don't throw out pants or shirts when they get dirty and sweaty, I wash them.

But not in the dishwasher. I'm not an animal. Not completely anyway.

Posted by: JackStraw at May 12, 2026 11:23 PM (viF8m)

224 Nathan Hale was hanged as a spy by the British. As he was being led to the gallows, he said “I regret that I have but one life to give for my country”.

Major Andre, the turncoat, thought he deserved a firing squad because he was an officer, and not the gibbet, but they hanged him.

Posted by: Common Tater at May 12, 2026 11:24 PM (/4VRy)

225 Never you earn that dirty hat. It has stories.
Posted by: BruceWayne

Too cheap to buy a new hat.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 12, 2026 11:24 PM (/lPRQ)

226 I figured May 12-13 was an ambitious target for Starship. 19 is fine.

Posted by: gKWVE at May 12, 2026 11:25 PM (gKWVE)

227 grew up playing baseball. And teaching diving and fishing and sailing. I've gone through a ton of hats.

It's just sweat and dirt. I don't throw out pants or shirts when they get dirty and sweaty, I wash them.

But not in the dishwasher. I'm not an animal. Not completely anyway.
Posted by: JackStraw

I never gave up a hat for a team even if played with them for 4 years. Superstition and I also hate new hats. Gotta break em in.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:25 PM (YZ0Fo)

228 The Beastie Boys are what the promise of rap held, Paul's Boutique is a stellar album.

Posted by: Thomas Bender at May 12, 2026 11:25 PM (XV/Pl)

229 Attention gamers

May 27th, 1986, was the release date for Dragon Quest in Japan.

Posted by: Anna Puma at May 12, 2026 11:25 PM (2GVsD)

230 I'd love to see one of the Starship tests pop out a couple of warp-like nacelles, just to freak out the rest of the world.

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at May 12, 2026 11:26 PM (qx7Zg)

231
JackStraw,

I'm so disappointed you aren't an animal.

My fantasies just went out the window.

Posted by: four seasons at May 12, 2026 11:26 PM (3ek7K)

232 But then what's the point if the hat doesn't have swear rings?
Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:16 PM (YZ0Fo)

None of my hats has a swear ring. I think they charge extra for that.

Posted by: tcn in AK at May 12, 2026 11:26 PM (DwqWV)

233 One, Two, 1, 2, 3, 4

www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBKk2EVvcJc

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at May 12, 2026 11:26 PM (aU1YS)

234 I'm getting in on the Aztec fun.
Posted by: Blonde Mortixtl

Posted by: Dark Lihuixtzichatl at May 12, 2026 11:27 PM (W5mpo)

235 None of my hats has a swear ring. I think they charge extra for that.
Posted by: tcn in AK

Maybe you swear less than me. It starts to soak in.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:27 PM (YZ0Fo)

236 When they say “60% chance of rain”, the idea is, it’s gonna rain, over 60% of the forecast area. If it doesn’t rain where you happen to be, that doesn’t mean they were wrong.

Posted by: Common Tater at May 12, 2026 11:27 PM (/4VRy)

237 Headgear is washed by leaving it out in the rain and then air drying.

Article in the Seattle Times about how an ICE arrest at a Latin food store was having a chilling effect on regulars coming in. Excellent! Get the names of the regulars and have ICE pay them visits! Citizens have nothing to fear.

Posted by: The Man from Athens at May 12, 2026 11:28 PM (k0Wyd)

238 Posted by: Common Tater at May 12, 2026 11:24 PM (/4VRy)

You reminded me of one of my top five movie scenes. Not a good movie IMO but the scene in the Patriot where Mel Gibson goes to rescue his son captured by the British to be hung was awesome.

Aim small, miss small.

Posted by: Harry Vandenburg at May 12, 2026 11:28 PM (qrzX6)

239 They then broke up and the entire group teamed up with Chris Cornell to make audioslave. Who made some great music.
Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:15 PM (YZ0Fo)

Rage Against the Garden.

Posted by: Reforger at May 12, 2026 11:28 PM (ZFqKB)

240

Take an old toothbrush and some laundry detergent to it under the shower. Let it air dry on the faucet handle for several hours / overnight. Do it BEFORE seeing any sweat rings.
Posted by: Doof

Are we still talking about hot dogs?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 12, 2026 11:28 PM (Cqx++)

241 If you wash your balls in the dishwasher remember to cancel the drying cycle.
Posted by: four seasons

Seems like the door seal would be rather pinchy.

Also overkill, unless your balls are Trump-sized.

Posted by: mikeskitl at May 12, 2026 11:28 PM (VHUov)

242 Hey!
Having been run over by a golf cart once, that joke wasn't all that funny.
Well. Okay. It was. But getting run over was no fun. He'll alcohol wasn't even involved...yet.

Posted by: Diogenes at May 12, 2026 11:28 PM (2WIwB)

243 Air fryer.
Posted by: BruceWayne

Oh, yeah. That's that thing sitting on my counter.
Posted by: nerdygirl
......

They're great for re-gifting.

Posted by: wth at May 12, 2026 11:29 PM (oq9dX)

244 236 When they say “60% chance of rain”, the idea is, it’s gonna rain, over 60% of the forecast area. If it doesn’t rain where you happen to be, that doesn’t mean they were wrong.
Posted by: Common Tater at May 12, 2026 11:27 PM (/4VRy)

When they say "scattered showers," that means, "wherever DH is holding a softball bat."

Posted by: tcn in AK at May 12, 2026 11:29 PM (DwqWV)

245 High school football coach, ex-pro, wore the same tennis shoes he wore to work out as a pro to all his kids games (superstition). He had to sew parts of the shoes together.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at May 12, 2026 11:30 PM (aU1YS)

246 Hey!
Having been run over by a golf cart once, that joke wasn't all that funny.
Well. Okay. It was. But getting run over was no fun. He'll alcohol wasn't even involved...yet.
Posted by: Diogenes at

I wasn't run over. But lost one in a course pond. Yes alcohol was involved in that.

Posted by: BruceWayne at May 12, 2026 11:30 PM (YZ0Fo)

247 They are. I did a search and its there 50th anniversary so they're touring. Rick Emmet is still lead singer too. Wonder if his pipes have survived. He could belt out songs with the best of them when he was younger.

Posted by: Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come at May 12, 2026 11:04 PM (sAmhv)

I think they are somewhat pretty intact...somewhat. I saw some recent rehearsal or show vid, which is why I was thinking they're out there again. Back in the day though, yeah he was the complete package, could sing like a motherfucker and could play as good too while singing.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at May 12, 2026 11:30 PM (snZF9)

248 Mariners win!

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 12, 2026 11:30 PM (A5RD0)

249 When they say “60% chance of rain”, the idea is, it’s gonna rain, over 60% of the forecast area. If it doesn’t rain where you happen to be, that doesn’t mean they were wrong.
Posted by: Common Tater

That's for microclimates.

In MN, that's "a 40% chance of nothing happening anywhere, and a 60% chance of a three-hundred-mile-long wall of clouds drowning all the frogs."

Posted by: mikeskitl at May 12, 2026 11:30 PM (VHUov)

250 DH's mom just left to go back to WI. She was here for a bit over a week. The visit was just long enough, I guess.

She believes that the government is rounding up all the brown and black skinned people and locking them up until they prove they are citizens.

I wish she would stop watching CBS News.

Posted by: tcn in AK at May 12, 2026 11:32 PM (DwqWV)

251 >>JackStraw,

>>I'm so disappointed

If I had a dollar for every time I've heard that I would have a lot of dollars.

Posted by: JackStraw at May 12, 2026 11:32 PM (viF8m)

252 221 If you wash your balls in the dishwasher remember to cancel the drying cycle.

Air drying works wonders. Careful with the door.

Posted by: The Man from Athens at May 12, 2026 11:33 PM (k0Wyd)

253
The best way to gauge your weather is to look out the windows in the morning.

Of course the weather will change in an hour.

Posted by: four seasons at May 12, 2026 11:33 PM (3ek7K)

254 248 Mariners win!
Posted by: nurse ratched at May 12, 2026 11:30 PM (A5RD0)

Woot!

I wish we could watch more of those games. MLB considers Alaska and Hawaii "in market" for the Mariners. Like I'm gonna just get in the car and head out to the game. So they don't let us watch them.

Posted by: tcn in AK at May 12, 2026 11:33 PM (DwqWV)

255 the colorado rockies look like they're probably not making the world series this year

Posted by: gKWVE at May 12, 2026 11:34 PM (gKWVE)

256 Thanks for the ONT.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at May 12, 2026 11:34 PM (bss/y)

257 WTH is a “swear ring?”

Posted by: Bulgtl at May 12, 2026 11:34 PM (77rzZ)

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