First World Problems...

That's the spring end of a pair of kitchen tongs that I use probably every day. They are of course made in China, but shockingly, the "stainless steel" is actually stainless steel, and the design, though simple, is excellent. That is my third pair of them, and I use them so often that I have two pairs in rotation.

But...and there is always a "but"... the spring is a pathetic piece of junk that is the failure point on every pair. Why not pop for the extra 10 cents and use a stainless steel spring?

Obviously the entire kitchen needs to be redone...maybe mid-century Scandinavian?

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Good afternoon good people.

*click click!*

Posted by: Tonypete at January 11, 2026 02:01 PM (cYBz/)

2 Why not pop for the extra 10 cents and use a stainless steel spring?

How often do you replace the tongs? What do they cost?

There's your answer.

Posted by: I used to have a different nic at January 11, 2026 02:02 PM (ExV1e)

3 The feedlips look bent.

Posted by: toby928(c) at January 11, 2026 02:03 PM (jc0TO)

4 The feedlips look bent.
Posted by: toby928(c)

I didn't go to Medical School but I'd be happy to take a look at it for you.

Posted by: Tonypete at January 11, 2026 02:05 PM (cYBz/)

5 Don't stainless steel thongs chafe? And I hate to ask what the spring action is all about!

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at January 11, 2026 02:05 PM (EtDTo)

6 That's the spring end of a pair of kitchen tongs that I use probably every day.

Meh. Just use a fork or a big spoon or a goldfish net (new and unused, of course).

Obviously the entire kitchen needs to be redone...maybe mid-century Scandinavian?

That actually sounds intriguing. If you go that route, we will, naturally, need to see photos.

Posted by: Paco at January 11, 2026 02:06 PM (2L+MU)

7 buy Edlund brand tongs

Posted by: mildy citrusy at January 11, 2026 02:06 PM (vrfYG)

8 Does it pass the click test?
If so no problem.

Posted by: Reforger at January 11, 2026 02:06 PM (v8m2L)

9 I hate how often things like that happen. I bought a small desktop retro fan, all metal, the old all metal fans never broke. Worked for a couple years, it broke, I was mad so I took it apart to see why. Of course in this all metal fan there was one stupid plastic part on the inside that sheared off, that was why it failed. Probably saved them 10 cents, as you say.

Posted by: Tom Servo at January 11, 2026 02:06 PM (FvUgT)

10 I don't know how but I am sure that fire is in some way the correct answer.

Posted by: toby928(c) at January 11, 2026 02:07 PM (jc0TO)

11 Obviously the entire kitchen needs to be redone...maybe mid-century Scandinavian?

---------

Mid-century Scandi? I'd sooner do my kitchen in 7th century Somali. Which they call "modern."

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at January 11, 2026 02:08 PM (+z8ms)

12 Tongs are designed to have a very finite number of uses. Each time you pick them up and click them twice, you've taken up two uses.

Posted by: BifBewalski - at January 11, 2026 02:08 PM (QVmho)

13 Probably saved them 10 cents, as you say.
Posted by: Tom Servo at January 11, 2026 02:06 PM (FvUgT)

$.10 over a million products is... umm... like... a fuckton of dimes.

Posted by: Reforger at January 11, 2026 02:09 PM (v8m2L)

14 Stainless steel is typically not used for springs. Spring steel is usually a high carbon steel that is heat treated and rusts.

Probably not necessary for kitchen utensils.

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at January 11, 2026 02:09 PM (BSdIE)

15 I bought a small desktop retro fan, all metal, the old all metal fans never broke. Worked for a couple years, it broke, I was mad so I took it apart to see why. Of course in this all metal fan there was one stupid plastic part on the inside that sheared off, that was why it failed. Probably saved them 10 cents, as you say.
Posted by: Tom Servo at January 11, 2026 02:06 PM (FvUgT)

It wasn't about saving them 10 cents. It was about having something you expected to not break, break. Planned obsolescence.

Posted by: I used to have a different nic at January 11, 2026 02:09 PM (ExV1e)

16 from edlund.com
• Replaceable stainless steel spring
• Made in U.S.A

Posted by: mildy citrusy at January 11, 2026 02:09 PM (vrfYG)

17 Tongs are designed to have a very finite number of uses. Each time you pick them up and click them twice, you've taken up two uses.
Posted by: BifBewalski - at January 11, 2026 02:08 PM

Put tongs in my hands and you will think they are castanets. I can't help myself.

Posted by: toby928(c) at January 11, 2026 02:10 PM (jc0TO)

18 We've been trying to reach you about your kitchen tong warranty, which is about to expire.

Posted by: Your Last 10 Voicemails at January 11, 2026 02:10 PM (+z8ms)

19 A stainless steel spring just is too much quality

Posted by: Skip at January 11, 2026 02:10 PM (Ia/+0)

20 Tongs are designed to have a very finite number of uses. Each time you pick them up and click them twice, you've taken up two uses.
Posted by: BifBewalski - at January 11, 2026 02:08 PM

Put tongs in my hands and you will think they are castanets. I can't help myself.
Posted by: toby928(c) at January 11, 2026 02:10 PM (jc0TO)

According to the handbook... one of you is a man and the other is questionable.

Posted by: I used to have a different nic at January 11, 2026 02:11 PM (ExV1e)

21 What am I looking at? It looks like a stack of mini onion rings caught between steel fittings.

Now I gotta go to Culvers.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at January 11, 2026 02:11 PM (qwx/I)

22 $.10 over a million products is... umm... like... a fuckton of dimes.

----------

And somebody's gonna have to ride back and get 'em.

Posted by: Taggart at January 11, 2026 02:12 PM (+z8ms)

23 Spring broke on my 2020 GE French door fridge flapper. Part should cost about $6, but GE does not sell then spring, you have to buy a whole new flapper for $170.

Bought GE because supposed to buy America, easy to get parts.

Instead had for buy a China spring from Amazon and bend, cut and jerryrig.

Posted by: Field Marshal Zhukov at January 11, 2026 02:13 PM (wBaIH)

24 I only use pneumatic tongs. The good ones have wifi and Bluetooth.

Posted by: fd at January 11, 2026 02:13 PM (vFG9F)

25 Tongs are designed to have a very finite number of uses. Each time you pick them up and click them twice, you've taken up two uses.
Posted by: BifBewalski

But if you don't click them twice, everything on the grill burns.
Same with strapping things down. If you don't pluck the straps and say, "that's not going anywhere", you'll lose your load.

I don't make the rules. The universe does.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 11, 2026 02:14 PM (u/kd+)

26 12 Tongs are designed to have a very finite number of uses. Each time you pick them up and click them twice, you've taken up two uses.
Posted by: BifBewalski - at January 11, 2026 02:08 PM (QVmho)

It's three clicks and it's a test. The manual wouldn't lie to me.

Posted by: Reforger at January 11, 2026 02:14 PM (v8m2L)

27 We don't make things to last anymore. Everything is cheap, disposable junk. Making things that last means one purchase. And besides, we need to have near-slaves in a totalitarian state make junk so that Americans can be on welfare and do drugs instead of working. I'm probably not explaining this well, but my Indian H1-B visa replacement will
do better. We need skilled foreigners to take over commenting. Americans, like me, are too idle and stupid. Back to eating lead paint chips and rubbing asbestos on my genitals!

Posted by: Fungible Idiot at January 11, 2026 02:14 PM (sn6yz)

28 You, very obviously, did not lubricate the gonkagizzler and add improvall fluid... per design

Posted by: Truck Monkey at January 11, 2026 02:15 PM (Bo9Yf)

29 This doesn't get us any closer to establishing a Palestinian state.

I'd like to give them Connecticut.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at January 11, 2026 02:15 PM (qwx/I)

30 I see you have failed to implement a routine tong-spring maintenance and lubrication schedule.

Posted by: Weasel at January 11, 2026 02:15 PM (VgJ79)

31 Combination FWP/Food Thread:

I like using the bags of pre-cooked Bacon Crumbles (don't judge me!) and opened up a new package. Fortunately, before I plunged my hand into it, I looked inside. Instead of red bacon there was a grey fuzzy lump.

I checked the expiration date and it was still good. Opened up my backup bag of bacon, as one does, with an identical date, and it looked okay.

This is the first time I have seen this happen. I assume the bag was punctured at some point and air got in. Not feeling like exposing myself to unknown toxic beasties, I quickly tossed the bag.

Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at January 11, 2026 02:16 PM (P/woT)

32 Combination FWP/Food Thread:

I like using the bags of pre-cooked Bacon Crumbles (don't judge me!) and opened up a new package. Fortunately, before I plunged my hand into it, I looked inside. Instead of red bacon there was a grey fuzzy lump.

I checked the expiration date and it was still good. Opened up my backup bag of bacon, as one does, with an identical date, and it looked okay.

This is the first time I have seen this happen. I assume the bag was punctured at some point and air got in. Not feeling like exposing myself to unknown toxic beasties, I quickly tossed the bag.
Posted by: Idaho Spudboy

That sucks.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 11, 2026 02:18 PM (u/kd+)

33 You people needing springs should call me. I have springs and more springs. Literally a horde of springs.

Posted by: fd at January 11, 2026 02:18 PM (vFG9F)

34 Mr. Dildo, you have failed to maintain your tongs.
Clean. Dry. Oil.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at January 11, 2026 02:18 PM (/lPRQ)

35 maybe mid-century Scandinavian?

Posted by CBD

Is Finland close enough?
IKEA!

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at January 11, 2026 02:18 PM (L0VNL)

36 Rolling pin. Nope. According to packaging it's a Movable Stick.

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at January 11, 2026 02:19 PM (Kt19C)

37 OT, but...
The government subsidized day care centers are empty.
The government subsidized health care programs are riddled with fraud.
The ballot drop boxes are un-monitored and stuffed.
The ballot counting is unsupervised.
The illegal immigrants are unvetted.
The Covid jabs are untested.
The cities are becoming crime-ridden and depopulated.
Congressional stock trades are unexamined.
University tuition is grossly expensive and grades are obscenely inflated.
Government construction projects are routinely enormously over budget and years behind schedule.
Our nation has become dangerously dysfunctional and rife with fraud & corruption.
And it's only now coming to light....

Posted by: proudvastrightwingguy at January 11, 2026 02:19 PM (MNCvZ)

38 The American Indian had no stainless steel. He made his tongs from two sharpened sticks, bound together at one end by tree bark. He used his tongs in harmony with nature, tonging only what he needed, and no more.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at January 11, 2026 02:19 PM (+z8ms)

39 Maybe it medicinal bacon?

Uncle Jeb's Penicillin & Pork.

It'll cure what ails you. Or not.

Posted by: Fungible Idiot at January 11, 2026 02:20 PM (sn6yz)

40 It looks bent to me.
Maybe it's the picture.

Posted by: redridinghood at January 11, 2026 02:20 PM (NpAcC)

41 "I see you have failed to implement a routine tong-spring maintenance and lubrication schedule.
Posted by: Weasel"

This really is the problem. It's a "disposable" mentality. Those tongs should be passed on to future generations.

Posted by: fd at January 11, 2026 02:21 PM (vFG9F)

42 30 I see you have failed to implement a routine tong-spring maintenance and lubrication schedule.
Posted by: Weasel at January 11, 2026 02:15 PM (VgJ79)

Fundamentals.

Posted by: Reforger at January 11, 2026 02:22 PM (v8m2L)

43 Thanks to your curse CBD. Last Monday the spring in my double door handle broke. Replaced the handle with a unlike kind for now. No idea if the spring can be replaced. Have it apart already.

Posted by: Skip at January 11, 2026 02:22 PM (Ia/+0)

44 My FWP is that I spilled a bottle of water into my notebook and it took a shit on me. Won't charge, battery dead. I had to go out and drop a grand for a new one. Pain in the ass, with all of the usernames, passwords, installs, facial recognition, etc.

The NSA now has an image of my face and corresponding fingerprint. Smartphone GPS and other tracking methods, it's all on your permanent record.

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at January 11, 2026 02:23 PM (BSdIE)

45 You people needing springs should call me. I have springs and more springs. Literally a horde of springs.
Posted by: fd at January 11, 2026 02:18 PM

Would you say that you have a plethora of springs?

Posted by: toby928(c) at January 11, 2026 02:23 PM (jc0TO)

46 Fuzzy Bacon Lump was the garage band name for the artist who eventually decided to call himself Meatloaf.

Posted by: Music nerd at January 11, 2026 02:23 PM (2Ez/1)

47 When in doubt, lubricate.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:23 PM (zZu0s)

48 "Would you say that you have a plethora of springs?
Posted by: toby928(c) "

Is that more than a buttload?

Posted by: fd at January 11, 2026 02:24 PM (vFG9F)

49 Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at January 11, 2026 02:23 PM (BSdIE)

Lol. It took me a sec. My first thought was, well, it's a mess, but the pages will dry...

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:24 PM (zZu0s)

50 I quickly tossed the bag.

Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at January 11, 2026 02:16 PM (P/woT)

It could have been delicious!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at January 11, 2026 02:24 PM (n9ltV)

51 I get my tongs from Harbor Freight.
Buy five, take four back.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at January 11, 2026 02:24 PM (2Ez/1)

52 It looks bent to me.
Maybe it's the picture.
Posted by: redridinghood at January 11, 2026 02:20 PM (NpAcC)

***

Oh it's bent alright...

Posted by: Juanita Broderick at January 11, 2026 02:25 PM (Bo9Yf)

53 Send the tongs to Alberta Oil Peon. I bet he has a box of replacement tong springs that he salvaged over the years, stashed in the trunk of a 1958 Studebaker.

Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at January 11, 2026 02:25 PM (P/woT)

54 Is that more than a buttload?
Posted by: fd at January 11, 2026 02:24 PM (vFG9F)

Less that one metric assload.
-Metrologist

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:25 PM (zZu0s)

55 Hell, some grease could work better, CBD.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:26 PM (zZu0s)

56 Less that one metric assload.
-Metrologist
Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:25 PM

Real men have Imperial Assloads.

Posted by: toby928(c) at January 11, 2026 02:26 PM (jc0TO)

57 I know a a certain company having critical safety equipment manufactured in China. When they received the first prototype, it was missing some key components in a circuit board and did not function properly. When asked why they left the components out, they said, "It's cheaper."

Posted by: Don in SoCo at January 11, 2026 02:26 PM (Teie1)

58

Dildos can get bent from overuse.

Oh tongs, lol.

Posted by: fourseasons at January 11, 2026 02:26 PM (3ek7K)

59 "It could have been delicious!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

They probably eat that stuff in France.

Posted by: fd at January 11, 2026 02:27 PM (vFG9F)

60 Aerator in my Moen faucet snapped off while cleaning it. Instead of a standard plastic aerator, it's some weird metal piece that requires replacing the faucet head. Hard to find and $42 + t/s from Moen.

Entire faucet assembly was $135 on Amazon, and I can replace the body and handles covered in hard water scale. I went with the total replacement, including this stupidly designed piece, because the rest of the damned hardware in this bathroom matches that faucet.

Posted by: Grudge Harbor at January 11, 2026 02:27 PM (yFLFB)

61 It could have been delicious!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at January 11, 2026 02:24 PM (n9ltV)

Sous vide'd with snails, smothered in a white wine, garlic, and butter sauce, the way the French do!

Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at January 11, 2026 02:27 PM (P/woT)

62 Why not pop for the extra 10 cents and use a stainless steel spring?
-------
But, this way they sell more tongs.

OTOH,"Hope springs eternal..."

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 11, 2026 02:28 PM (XeU6L)

63 Hadrian sure delivered some imperial assloads.

Posted by: gKWVE at January 11, 2026 02:28 PM (gKWVE)

64 The spring in the lock is kind of a watch spring, flat. Coil and inside point is 90 degrees bent inward

Posted by: Skip at January 11, 2026 02:28 PM (Ia/+0)

65 The reason bacon is made from pigs into bacon is so that it will keep. That is strange.

Its like all the uncured bacon and sausage I see. So it's just pork, right?

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:28 PM (zZu0s)

66 3 The feedlips look bent.
Posted by: toby928(c) at January 11, 2026 02:03 PM (jc0TO)

This is now a gynecology thread?

Posted by: Speculumative fiction at January 11, 2026 02:29 PM (TbWk/)

67 What am I looking at? Why am I not seeing duct tape covering that which is unsightly?

Posted by: t-bird at January 11, 2026 02:30 PM (rTiUi)

68 This is now a gynecology thread?

Posted by: Speculumative fiction at January 11, 2026 02:29 PM (TbWk/)

Guns!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at January 11, 2026 02:30 PM (n9ltV)

69 The feedlips look bent.
Posted by: toby928(c) at January 11, 2026 02:03 PM (jc0TO)

This is now a gynecology thread?
Posted by: Speculumative fiction at January 11, 2026 02:29 PM (TbWk/)

Gub Thread!

Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at January 11, 2026 02:30 PM (P/woT)

70 The reason bacon is made from pigs into bacon is so that it will keep. That is strange.

Its like all the uncured bacon and sausage I see. So it's just pork, right?
Posted by: Aetius451AD

What's weird? Raw bacon left on a counter? It spoils. Lard doesn't.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 11, 2026 02:31 PM (u/kd+)

71 Perhaps Ronco's handy home galvanization kit.

Posted by: DaveA at January 11, 2026 02:31 PM (FhXTo)

72 And fartclams.

Posted by: The scissoring sisters at January 11, 2026 02:31 PM (2Ez/1)

73 Hate to tell you CBD, but a spring made of CRES is much more than 10 cents.

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable and Totally Unserious at January 11, 2026 02:32 PM (xvV+O)

74 Spring broke on my 2020 GE French door fridge flapper.
--------

*?*

What is a 'door fridge flapper?

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 11, 2026 02:32 PM (XeU6L)

75 This is now a gynecology thread?

Posted by: Speculumative fiction at January 11, 2026 02:29 PM (TbWk/)

Guns!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

NFA tax is now gone. Still have to send fingerprints to FBI. Why? You have a copy from my original CHL application. They haven't changed.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 11, 2026 02:32 PM (u/kd+)

76 *What is a 'door fridge flapper?*

Twenty bucks. Same as the Lowe's employee break room.

Posted by: The scissoring sisters at January 11, 2026 02:33 PM (2Ez/1)

77 Cause stainless steel springs is hard, yo.

Posted by: Eromero at January 11, 2026 02:33 PM (o2ZRX)

78 What is a 'door fridge flapper?
Posted by: Mike Hammer

On side by sides, it covers the seam between the two doors from the inside.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 11, 2026 02:33 PM (u/kd+)

79 On side by sides, it covers the seam between the two doors from the inside.
Posted by: rickb223
--------

Ah.Thanks.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 11, 2026 02:35 PM (XeU6L)

80 70 The reason bacon is made from pigs into bacon is so that it will keep. That is strange.
_-_
'cause the little b@$!@#ds keep gettin' out of the pen, that's why. Otherwise, nothin' fresher than still rootin'.

Posted by: Don in SoCo at January 11, 2026 02:35 PM (Teie1)

81 Flapper? I just met her!

Posted by: Rimshot at January 11, 2026 02:37 PM (2Ez/1)

82 Sauteed the rice in butter from the Rice-A-Roni box. Snipped open the seasoning packet to add. Envelop, although sealed on all sides, was empty. Had to improvise flavoring up the rice. It came out pretty decent, but still...

Posted by: washrivergal at January 11, 2026 02:37 PM (1tnYn)

83 The reason bacon is made from pigs into bacon is so that it will keep. That is strange.
----

Keeps 'em from flying away.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 11, 2026 02:37 PM (XeU6L)

84 Why did most flappers seem to be built like 12 year old boys?

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:39 PM (zZu0s)

85 A good pig will do that.

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable and Totally Unserious at January 11, 2026 02:39 PM (xvV+O)

86 I’ve never understood the desire for Scandinavian design. It’s just cold and barren, to me.

Posted by: RebeccaH at January 11, 2026 02:39 PM (VFung)

87 Uncured bacon is an abomination against God and man.

Posted by: Delurker at January 11, 2026 02:39 PM (gtcuf)

88 Salt. Nitrates.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:40 PM (zZu0s)

89 My PITA busted spring is the return spring on the push to engage handle of the Toro lawn mower. It'd require disassembling the entire handle to replace. Fixed with bungee cord and hiring a lawn service.

Posted by: DaveA at January 11, 2026 02:40 PM (FhXTo)

90 83 The reason bacon is made from pigs into bacon is so that it will keep. That is strange.
----
Keeps 'em from flying away.

_-_
There's a song about that:
http://tinyurl.com/bdd36syj

Posted by: Don in SoCo at January 11, 2026 02:41 PM (Teie1)

91 86 I’ve never understood the desire for Scandinavian design. It’s just cold and barren, to me.

Posted by: RebeccaH at January 11, 2026 02:39 PM (VFung)

++++

I don't like it either and I'm half Norwegian. It always looks bleak and cold. You'd think they'd go for a warm and cozy environment to off-set all the snow and ice they live in.

Posted by: washrivergal at January 11, 2026 02:42 PM (1tnYn)

92 A chef I know used to use tongs to cook fish. He switched to a large fork. Sharp, easy, worked every time. He would hold it up to show it and declare these were the tines that fried men's soles.

Posted by: Diogenes at January 11, 2026 02:42 PM (2WIwB)

93 I think it was at the Dollar General that my wife found a set of 3 "stainless" tongs for about $3. They're small, but basically, disposable.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at January 11, 2026 02:42 PM (NwnyJ)

94 84 Why did most flappers seem to be built like 12 year old boys?
Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:39 PM (zZu0s)

They used binders

Posted by: night lifted at January 11, 2026 02:42 PM (kJmLc)

95 butter from the Rice-A-Roni box.

Box-A-Buttah

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at January 11, 2026 02:43 PM (Kt19C)

96 My FWP was installing a new range in my kitchen. I don't have a proper 4-prong receptacle, so I had to hardwire directly into my house wiring.

Not as difficult as I expected.

Setting the clock on the range was harder. Took me three days to figure it out.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at January 11, 2026 02:43 PM (ESVrU)

97 Ah, but have you ever tried Turkey bacon? Mmm, mmm, tastes like hospital.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at January 11, 2026 02:43 PM (qwx/I)

98 Why not pop for the extra 10 cents and use a stainless steel spring?

How often do you replace the tongs? What do they cost?

There's your answer.
Posted by: I used to have a different nic at January 11, 2026 02:02 PM (ExV1e)

Hard to make good springs from stainless steel. Carbon steel is the traditional choice for springs for good reason.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at January 11, 2026 02:44 PM (8zz6B)

99 Although springs abound at the hardware store they are often proprietary. One cannot casually replace the necessary spring.

One does not appreciate the physics that are involved in the use of the correct spring until it becomes necessary.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at January 11, 2026 02:44 PM (slo2K)

100 I went into Wally World to get a Johnsonville summer sausage. Despite the sealed plastic, one end was covered with blue mold. So, I left it in the display with the blue mold end sticking up

Posted by: Accomack at January 11, 2026 02:45 PM (T8bqm)

101 86 I’ve never understood the desire for Scandinavian design. It’s just cold and barren, to me.

Posted by: RebeccaH at January 11, 2026 02:39 PM (VFung)

Not my favorite either, I'd go with Italian Provincial. My better half likes the white washed look prevalent today.

Posted by: night lifted at January 11, 2026 02:45 PM (kJmLc)

102 440C is Chevy spring steel

Posted by: Accomack at January 11, 2026 02:45 PM (T8bqm)

103 RebeccaH- I think you just answered why

Posted by: Skip at January 11, 2026 02:46 PM (Ia/+0)

104 95 butter from the Rice-A-Roni box.

Box-A-Buttah

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at January 11, 2026 02:43 PM (Kt19C)

++++

Okay, Mr. Niggler. I sauteed in butter the rice from a Rice-A-Roni box.

Posted by: washrivergal at January 11, 2026 02:46 PM (1tnYn)

105 Lips and flaps? I'm in.

Posted by: Les Bos at January 11, 2026 02:47 PM (nPp6w)

106
I’ve never understood the desire for Scandinavian design. It’s just cold and barren, to me.

Posted by: RebeccaH

===========

When I was in college I visited a professor's house that was furnished with something like colorless lawn chairs and picnic tables. I figured professors must be as broke as students. I later saw that house advertised for summer rental with "Swedish Modern furniture." First time I knew that was a thing.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at January 11, 2026 02:47 PM (Jxa0O)

107 They used binders
Posted by: night lifted at January 11, 2026 02:42 PM (kJmLc)

Like Mutt Rombley?

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:47 PM (zZu0s)

108 All this spring talk has me recoiling.

Posted by: scampydog at January 11, 2026 02:48 PM (41CYW)

109 My biggest 1st world problem is my computer sending all my searches to X and FB. If I'm looking up growths on dogs, for example, FB will bombard me with photos, heartbreaking stories, and outright quackery (give your dog grass and bacon grease). I think it also listens to me.

Posted by: night lifted at January 11, 2026 02:48 PM (kJmLc)

110 Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at January 11, 2026 02:43 PM (Kt19C)

++++

Okay, Mr. Niggler. I sauteed in butter the rice from a Rice-A-Roni box.
Posted by: washrivergal at January 11, 2026 02:46 PM (1tnYn)

Damn!

Oh. 'Niggler'. Nvm.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:49 PM (zZu0s)

111 Send the tongs to Alberta Oil Peon. I bet he has a box of replacement tong springs that he salvaged over the years, stashed in the trunk of a 1958 Studebaker.
Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at January 11, 2026 02:25 PM (P/woT)

Heh. I am sure i would have a spring that would work. I do have several boxes of springs, crudely sorted.

I have a set or two of '58 Studebaker wheel covers. The only year that Studebaker used 14" wheels, you know.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at January 11, 2026 02:49 PM (8zz6B)

112 I’ve never understood the desire for Scandinavian design. It’s just cold and barren, to me.
Posted by: RebeccaH
-------
'Sterile' is the word that I use.

Architects, industrial designers like to use the word 'elegant'.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 11, 2026 02:49 PM (XeU6L)

113 Kitchen tongs? What? I think that's a man card-loss offense!

What can you do with kitchen tongs that you can't do with a fork or two? Or just your fingers!

Did Achilles use kitchen tongs? Attila the Hun? Gengis Kahn? Daniel Boone? Randolph Scott?

Posted by: Gref at January 11, 2026 02:49 PM (5rh/l)

114 When preparing Rice A Roni it's best to read the directions from the box while it's sitting in the trash can.

Posted by: Follow me for more bachelor cooking tips at January 11, 2026 02:50 PM (2Ez/1)

115 When preparing Rice A Roni it's best to read the directions from the box while it's sitting in the trash can.
Posted by: Follow me for more bachelor cooking tips at January 1

LOL! Its funny because it's true!

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:51 PM (zZu0s)

116 97 Ah, but have you ever tried Turkey bacon? Mmm, mmm, tastes like hospital.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at January 11, 2026 02:43 PM (qwx/I)

++++

I've never been tempted to try turkey bacon, doesn't even sound rational or reasonable.

Posted by: washrivergal at January 11, 2026 02:51 PM (1tnYn)

117 Did Achilles use kitchen tongs? Attila the Hun? Gengis Kahn? Daniel Boone? Randolph Scott?
Posted by: Gref at January 11, 2026 02:49 PM (5rh/l)

Randolph Scott!
(stands up, removes hat, places it over heart.)

Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at January 11, 2026 02:51 PM (P/woT)

118 All this spring talk has me recoiling.

Posted by: scampydog at January 11, 2026 02:48 PM (41CYW)

You'll bounce back.

Posted by: Roger at January 11, 2026 02:52 PM (nPp6w)

119 Bacon does not come from turkeys.

Posted by: fd at January 11, 2026 02:52 PM (vFG9F)

120 The fridge door flapper is aka a mullion. It creates a seal between the two door. I did not use the term mullion because I was afraid it would encourage pervert comments.

Oh well.

Posted by: Field Marshal Zhukov at January 11, 2026 02:52 PM (wBaIH)

121 I think it also listens to me.
Posted by: night lifted at January 11, 2026 02:48 PM (kJmLc)

Me: Siri, what is the temperature outside?
ALEXA: Diogenes, who is Siri?
Me: Sorry, Alexa, what is the temperature outside?
ALEXA: Why don't you ask Siri! That bitch is everywhere!

Posted by: Diogenes at January 11, 2026 02:52 PM (2WIwB)

122 Randolph Scott!
(stands up, removes hat, places it over heart.)
Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at January 11, 2026 02:51 PM (P/woT)

Spudboy Johnson is right!

Posted by: Aetius451AD Johnson's work phone at January 11, 2026 02:53 PM (zZu0s)

123 Randolph Scott?
What ever happened to him, anyway?

Posted by: The Statler Brothers at January 11, 2026 02:54 PM (2Ez/1)

124 114 When preparing Rice A Roni it's best to read the directions from the box while it's sitting in the trash can.
Posted by: Follow me for more bachelor cooking tips at January 11, 2026 02:50 PM (

So , I'm not alone

Posted by: night lifted at January 11, 2026 02:54 PM (kJmLc)

125 Did Achilles use kitchen tongs? Attila the Hun? Gengis Kahn? Daniel Boone? Randolph Scott?
Posted by: Gref at January 11, 2026 02:49 PM (5rh/l)
---
Achilles, Attila, and Genghis had proper bacon wenches to do their tonging for them.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at January 11, 2026 02:54 PM (ESVrU)

126
Springs should be premium quality.

Gun springs from Wolff, Lee Springs for everything else.

Pricy, but quality costs.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at January 11, 2026 02:54 PM (y9nCu)

127 Hard to make good springs from stainless steel. Carbon steel is the traditional choice for springs for good reason.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon
---------

Recently replaced the keyboard on this laptop. Taking the old one apart, my hoarder instinct compelled me to save the SS torsion springs under the keys. So, great, now another little bit of accumulated stuff.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 11, 2026 02:55 PM (XeU6L)

128 Rice-a-Roni is not the same as rhe Knorr (used to be Lipton?) Rice side dishes.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Johnson's work phone at January 11, 2026 02:55 PM (zZu0s)

129 The fridge door flapper is aka a mullion. It creates a seal between the two door. I did not use the term mullion because I was afraid it would encourage pervert comments.

Oh well.
Posted by: Field Marshal Zhukov at January 11, 2026 02:52 PM (wBaIH)

Mullion. Cue the fish puns? What do you get when you cross a mullet with a grunion?

Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at January 11, 2026 02:55 PM (P/woT)

130 Oh my! That opening is a MAJESTIC piece of Snittery … well played, CBD!

Posted by: Dr_No at January 11, 2026 02:56 PM (ayRl+)

131 Fish punz? We've got a mullion of them.

Posted by: Oh, no... at January 11, 2026 02:57 PM (2Ez/1)

132 Mullion. Cue the fish puns? What do you get when you cross a mullet with a grunion?
Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at January 11, 2026 02:55 PM (P/woT)

A grullet?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at January 11, 2026 02:57 PM (8zz6B)

133 131 Fish punz? We've got a mullion of them.
Posted by: Oh, no... at January 11, 2026 02:57 PM (2Ez/1)

Nobody better carp about it either

Posted by: night lifted at January 11, 2026 02:58 PM (kJmLc)

134 In light of FWP in Minnesota:

"My light is green,
Your hair is blue,
Look out Cupcake,
I'M COMING THROUGH!"

Posted by: rickb223 at January 11, 2026 02:59 PM (u/kd+)

135 When preparing Rice A Roni it's best to read the directions from the box while it's sitting in the trash can.
-------

Due to some recent post-surgical difficulties, I have been having Cream Of Rice for some meals. Probably the worst thing I have ever eaten. Tastes like wet plaster smells. Rice will never be the same for me.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 11, 2026 02:59 PM (XeU6L)

136 Is it just me, or is Amazon deliberately omitting country of origin these days? Hunting for new poultry shears for someone who wants to complain if I don't buy good ones.

Posted by: night lifted at January 11, 2026 02:59 PM (kJmLc)

137 Beach blanket party!

Posted by: rickb223 at January 11, 2026 02:59 PM (u/kd+)

138 Gotta be careful there, Normie.
Ya don't want to mix your mullions in with yer muntins.
That would be bad.

Posted by: Cliff Clavin at January 11, 2026 03:00 PM (2Ez/1)

139 Is it just me, or is Amazon deliberately omitting country of origin these days? Hunting for new poultry shears for someone who wants to complain if I don't buy good ones.
Posted by: night lifted

They are slso ommitting Amazon Prime and two day shipping and using fucking USPS to deliver.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 11, 2026 03:00 PM (u/kd+)

140 On side by sides, it covers the seam between the two doors from the inside.
Posted by: rickb223
-------

Heh. Those things present a 1WP on their own.

My little nephew broke one of the plastic hinges on my fridge, because the flapper didn't fold back when he (slowly, quietly, while being sneaky) opened the door-- and then repeatedly *slammed* it, trying to get door to close. So much for sneaking, LOL.

Posted by: JQ at January 11, 2026 03:01 PM (rdVOm)

141 Here's a real 1st World Problem:

https://x.com/LucyTCWife/status/20103136350219

06142

Go ahead and laugh. It's okay!

Posted by: naturalfake at January 11, 2026 03:01 PM (iJfKG)

142 Due to some recent post-surgical difficulties, I have been having Cream Of Rice for some meals. Probably the worst thing I have ever eaten. Tastes like wet plaster smells. Rice will never be the same for me.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 11, 2026 02:59 PM (XeU6L)

You could always go with real rice and add whatever you need , ex. raisins, spice, etc. It remains cereal.

Posted by: night lifted at January 11, 2026 03:02 PM (kJmLc)

143 All this spring talk has me recoiling.

Posted by: scampydog at January 11, 2026 02:48 PM (41CYW)

You'll bounce back.
Posted by: Roger at January 11, 2026 02:52 PM (nPp6w)

The key is to remain flexible.
Posted by: Sham Wower
------

Don't get wound up about it.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 11, 2026 03:02 PM (XeU6L)

144 They are slso ommitting Amazon Prime and two day shipping and using fucking USPS to deliver.
Posted by: rickb223 at January 11, 2026 03:00 PM (u/kd+)

Indeed they are, and it takes quite a while for a package to move 10 miles.

Posted by: night lifted at January 11, 2026 03:03 PM (kJmLc)

145 @ 119 Bacon does not come from turkeys.
______________________________________

You left the job unfinished. Now tell us where it DOES come from.

Posted by: Dr_No at January 11, 2026 03:04 PM (ayRl+)

146 There's nothing worse than chumming for fish puns.

Troll out front should have told you that.

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at January 11, 2026 03:04 PM (BSdIE)

147 Combination FWP/Food Thread:

I like using the bags of pre-cooked Bacon Crumbles (don't judge me!) and opened up a new package. Fortunately, before I plunged my hand into it, I looked inside. Instead of red bacon there was a grey fuzzy lump.

I checked the expiration date and it was still good. Opened up my backup bag of bacon, as one does, with an identical date, and it looked okay.

This is the first time I have seen this happen. I assume the bag was punctured at some point and air got in. Not feeling like exposing myself to unknown toxic beasties, I quickly tossed the bag.
Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at January 11, 2026 02:16 PM (P/woT)

You missed out on eating "Roquefort Bacon", a French delicacy!

Posted by: naturalfake at January 11, 2026 03:05 PM (iJfKG)

148 There's nothing worse than chumming for fish puns.

Troll out front should have told you that.
Posted by: Rev. Wishbone

You mean the troll perched on the bottom step?

Posted by: Tuna at January 11, 2026 03:07 PM (lJ0H4)

149 This is how we're gonna weasel out of our promise to help-

US military warns Trump it needs more time to prepare for Iran strikes - report
Senior US defense officials warned President Donald Trump that more time is needed to prepare for potential strikes on Iran, according to reports.

https://tinyurl.com/5ecnvhy4

Posted by: Don Black at January 11, 2026 03:07 PM (ZxPkt)

150 Spring talk can create tension.

Posted by: Just need to uncoil at January 11, 2026 03:07 PM (w8uSE)

151
You missed out on eating "Roquefort Bacon", a French delicacy!
Posted by: naturalfake at January 11, 2026 03:05 PM (iJfKG)

Delicacy: "Pull something out of the trash, Ong. Put it on a plate and let's see if the round-eye eats it."

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at January 11, 2026 03:08 PM (y9nCu)

152 I trend pretty far to the right in most things politically and I'm no 'environmentalist tree hugger' but if I were king one thing I'd want to do is stop the flow of material into landfills. That would include a ban on plastics and biohazards that can't either be 'unzipped' or repurposed or incinerated in incinerators that prevent toxics from reaching the atmosphere.

Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK) at January 11, 2026 03:08 PM (QGaXH)

153 Got very windy here

Posted by: Skip at January 11, 2026 03:09 PM (Ia/+0)

154 @ 150 Spring talk can create tension.
_________________________________

… unlike Winter Talk, yes?

Posted by: Dr_No at January 11, 2026 03:09 PM (ayRl+)

155 I took my favorite tongs to my shop & put a ss flat spring in after the spring broke, probably 30yrs ago. Have done it to all that I have now.

Posted by: Bob at January 11, 2026 03:11 PM (hWhmF)

156 Landfills are our gifts to future generations. One day they will figure out how to make robots to mine them.

Posted by: fd at January 11, 2026 03:12 PM (vFG9F)

157 149 This is how we're gonna weasel out of our promise to help-

US military warns Trump it needs more time to prepare for Iran strikes - report
Senior US defense officials warned President Donald Trump that more time is needed to prepare for potential strikes on Iran, according to reports.

https://tinyurl.com/5ecnvhy4
Posted by: Don Black at January 11, 2026 03:07 PM (ZxPkt)

We were never going to help.

Posted by: Hungary '56 at January 11, 2026 03:12 PM (EfxsC)

158 I'm just beside myself over this delay. Maybe there are things happening unseen, that I have no way to know. All I know is we could end the Islamic Republic with one big shove, and wtf are we waiting for.

Sorry if this counts as a threadjack.

Posted by: Don Black at January 11, 2026 03:12 PM (ZxPkt)

159 US military warns Trump it needs more time to prepare for Iran strikes - report
Senior US defense officials warned President Donald Trump that more time is needed to prepare for potential strikes on Iran, according to reports.

https://tinyurl.com/5ecnvhy4
Posted by: Don Black at January 11, 2026 03:07 PM (ZxPkt)

Sounds like McClellan is back in charge.

Posted by: Tom Servo at January 11, 2026 03:13 PM (FvUgT)

160 What Kind of icemen are you?

Show me your tongs!

Posted by: Julius Marx at January 11, 2026 03:14 PM (oftw2)

161 My FWP was a push broom that I purchased from Home Depot. The head snapped off from the handle after maybe five uses. All plastic. I might be able to thread a large wood screw from the head into the handle. The fact that I shouldn't have to is entirely beside the point, but serves to remind me why I'm done with Home Depot...

Posted by: Joe Kidd at January 11, 2026 03:15 PM (nbLIj)

162 Wow, I just dropped in and suddenly everything is black pill and Trump's not doing what he said. That was quick.

Posted by: Archimedes at January 11, 2026 03:16 PM (Riz8t)

163 It could be a dodge.

My thought still stands for me that thr less we do to help a new regime, the better. Although, if a toppling does happen, maybe have 'accidents' happen to all the IRGC commanders.

Would be a horrible coincidence, but they are a bunch of terror fuckwads.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Johnson's work phone at January 11, 2026 03:16 PM (zZu0s)

164 That was quick.
Posted by: Archimedes at January 11, 2026 03:16 PM (Riz8t)

The black anise filled bastard jellybean will always be with us.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Johnson's work phone at January 11, 2026 03:17 PM (zZu0s)

165 Or it could be a Ram.

Posted by: With a Hemi at January 11, 2026 03:17 PM (2Ez/1)

166 very windy here

As in van nuys ca.

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at January 11, 2026 03:17 PM (Kt19C)

167 A compassionate person concerned about others and the community at large would ditch the tongs and hire an out-of-work-single-Mom-lobster.

Posted by: Workin' Hard For the Money at January 11, 2026 03:18 PM (oftw2)

168 Spring talk can create tension.
Posted by: Just need to uncoil at January 11, 2026 03:07 PM (w8uSE)

Try not to get too torqued over it...

Posted by: Joe Kidd at January 11, 2026 03:18 PM (nbLIj)

169 https://www.youtube.com/live/99_POM2-mLI?si=7IsOxx3Tt7Cb4U1-

I really like this guy. He is live-streaming every day with updates on the situation in Iran.

Posted by: NancyB at January 11, 2026 03:18 PM (Z7pmY)

170 12 Tongs are designed to have a very finite number of uses. Each time you pick them up and click them twice, you've taken up two uses.
Posted by: BifBewalski - at January 11, 2026 02:08 PM (QVmho)

Tongs are one of those kitchen utensils that I can neither have too many of them lying around, nor find enough uses for them. Tongs and spatulas are the unsung kitchen heroes.

Posted by: Darrell Harris at January 11, 2026 03:19 PM (0CU3H)

171 I wonder if the rusted spring in the tongs is a stainless grade that wasn't passivated properly or at all....

Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK) at January 11, 2026 03:19 PM (QGaXH)

172 If you are sick you may have a coat on your tong.

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at January 11, 2026 03:19 PM (Kt19C)

173 When I lived in France, there was a family I met from the south who made the most magnificent garbure. Big chunks of soft cooked pork, etc. I would love to learn how to make it that good.

Posted by: Marcus T at January 11, 2026 03:20 PM (EWq0C)

174 150 Spring talk can create tension.
Posted by: Just need to uncoil at January 11, 2026 03:07 PM (w8uSE)

It's too early for spring, we're barely into winter - though you wouldn't know it around there, very mild 'winter' so far even by Southern California standards.

Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK) at January 11, 2026 03:21 PM (QGaXH)

175 148 There's nothing worse than chumming for fish puns.

Troll out front should have told you that.
Posted by: Rev. Wishbone

You mean the troll perched on the bottom step?
Posted by: Tuna at January 11, 2026 03:07 PM (lJ0H4)

IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE TUNA'S NIC IS A FISH PUN.

Posted by: BEN ROETHLISBERGER at January 11, 2026 03:22 PM (PiwSw)

176 Capt. Picard would say "There are FOUR tongs!" …

Posted by: Dr_No at January 11, 2026 03:22 PM (ayRl+)

177 My FWP is that New York Times' Nicholas Kristof is really bad at memes.

https://is.gd/yDfCeu

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Like Shakespeare Except More Betterer at January 11, 2026 03:22 PM (L/fGl)

178 No tong.

Posted by: Madeline Kahn at January 11, 2026 03:22 PM (PiwSw)

179 Yeah I may be black-pilled on this issue. Comes with all my other problems. Those have their own pills,

Posted by: Don Black at January 11, 2026 03:22 PM (ZxPkt)

180 153 Got very windy here.
_-_
Was it something you ate?

Posted by: Don in SoCo at January 11, 2026 03:23 PM (Teie1)

181 OT: re our convo last night about AiC and Unplugged.

https://youtu.be/jUahBnEkIw8?
si=a_ZnMGpHhIGFYge0

Staley looks stoned out of his gourd. Still had an interesting singing voice.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Johnson's work phone at January 11, 2026 03:23 PM (zZu0s)

182 Delicacy: "Pull something out of the trash, Ong. Put it on a plate and let's see if the round-eye eats it."
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at January 11, 2026 03:08 PM (y9nCu)

Reminds me of this Korean sushi place I used to go to. My friend and I were always the only round-eyes in the place. After a few visits, they would put things in front of us and one or two guys would come out of the kitchen and watch us scarf it down. All top-notch stuff, but we often wondered if maybe they were dumping some old inventory onto us...

Posted by: Joe Kidd at January 11, 2026 03:24 PM (nbLIj)

183 My other FWP is that Ted Lieu is real, real stupid.

https://is.gd/JWV2zG

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Like Shakespeare Except More Betterer at January 11, 2026 03:24 PM (L/fGl)

184 very mild 'winter' so far even by Southern California standards.
Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK) at January 11, 2026 03:21 PM (QGaXH)

Mild for Kentucky as well. I am not complaining.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Johnson's work phone at January 11, 2026 03:24 PM (zZu0s)

185 It is South Texas cold today. So, I have a beef stew in the oven. It smells like heaven in my house.

Posted by: nogooddeed at January 11, 2026 03:26 PM (4Af9R)

186 Friends don't let friends snow shovel. GRAPHIC.

https://is.gd/QL5r6B

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Like Shakespeare Except More Betterer at January 11, 2026 03:27 PM (L/fGl)

187 148 There's nothing worse than chumming for fish puns.

Troll out front should have told you that.
Posted by: Rev. Wishbone

You mean the troll perched on the bottom step?

This is giving me a haddock

Posted by: Roger at January 11, 2026 03:27 PM (nPp6w)

188 Fixed this before; scrub the spring, douse it in WD40, wipe off, machine screw with counterlocking nuts. Robert's your fathers brother.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at January 11, 2026 03:27 PM (mlg/3)

189 Why not pop for the extra 10 cents and use a stainless steel spring?

---
The next pair you buy with the steel spring, hand wash them and oil the spring with cooking oil to keep it from rusting. Dish washers get the water really hot which dissolves all oils and promotes rust.

Stainless is terrible for springs cuz its not springy. Chrome plated steel springs are actually a good choice if the manufacturer is worried about rust.

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at January 11, 2026 03:28 PM (qtBQt)

190 Maybe Trump is consulting with Congress.
He has to sober up half of them, takes a little time.
AOC is probably getting her nails done.

Posted by: Case at January 11, 2026 03:28 PM (4rWc3)

191 This is giving me a haddock.

That hurt me to my sole.

Posted by: nogooddeed at January 11, 2026 03:29 PM (4Af9R)

192 Are Tong Wars still a thing?

Posted by: Chinee Fire Drill at January 11, 2026 03:30 PM (oftw2)

193 Gaming headset companies always use cheap AF plastic on the bits that receive the most wear and tear. Gotta be deliberate.

Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at January 11, 2026 03:31 PM (f0sNM)

194 All this spring talk has me recoiling.

Posted by: scampydog at January 11, 2026 02:48 PM (41CYW)

You'll bounce back.
Posted by: Roger at January 11, 2026 02:52 PM (nPp6w)

The key is to remain flexible.
Posted by: Sham Wower
------

Don't get wound up about it.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 11, 2026 03:02 PM (XeU6L)
***

On day you will be sprung from this semantic prison.

Posted by: Diogenes at January 11, 2026 03:32 PM (2WIwB)

195 This is how we're gonna weasel out of our promise to help-

US military warns Trump it needs more time to prepare for Iran strikes - report
Senior US defense officials warned President Donald Trump that more time is needed to prepare for potential strikes on Iran, according to reports.

https://tinyurl.com/5ecnvhy4
Posted by: Don Black

But Trump said we were locked and loaded and ready to go....

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at January 11, 2026 03:32 PM (/lPRQ)

196 Gaming headset companies always use cheap AF plastic on the bits that receive the most wear and tear. Gotta be deliberate.
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at January 11, 2026 03:31 PM (f0sNM)

Earbud might be the way to go.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Johnson's work phone at January 11, 2026 03:32 PM (zZu0s)

197 Checked all eight of my tongs.
No rust at all.
A drop of olive oil will do ya

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at January 11, 2026 03:33 PM (/lPRQ)

198 The next pair you buy with the steel spring, hand wash them and oil the spring with cooking oil to keep it from rusting. Dish washers get the water really hot which dissolves all oils and promotes rust.

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at January 11, 2026 03:28 PM (qtBQt)

I never put kitchen tools in the dishwasher for this reason...

Posted by: Joe Kidd at January 11, 2026 03:33 PM (nbLIj)

199 At the risk of posting text that is too long, I'm going to to introduce some AI levity into this subject.

"Give me a description of a rusted spring in a pair of kitchen tongs in the style of William Faulkner."

In the dim light of the well-worn kitchen, laden with the scent of memory and the echo of laughter that once danced freely, there lay a pair of kitchen tongs, their metallic gleam dulled by the relentless march of time. Draped over the edge of the countertop, they were more than mere utensils; they embodied a history steeped in the countless meals prepared and the familial bonds forged over the clinking of plates and the warmth of shared laughter.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at January 11, 2026 03:34 PM (2Ez/1)

200 162 Wow, I just dropped in and suddenly everything is black pill and Trump's not doing what he said. That was quick.
Posted by: Archimedes at January 11, 2026 03:16 PM (Riz8t)

No black pill here. I just don't think we were ever going to help (not in any significant way). This works out for us either way: the mullahs get ousted or they get weakened and embarrassed. Both are good outcomes when you consider we're not risking blood or treasure for either. It's no knock on Trump. He feints and encourages like any president would/should. Sometimes it's more bully pulpit than bully. And that's fine. Iranians got themselves into this, and they'll have to get themselves out if it (a tall order, I know), if they're going to have any chance of long-term success.

What do people really want done anyway? Bombing key units? Sustained air operations? Targeted assassinations?

Posted by: Hungary '56 at January 11, 2026 03:34 PM (EfxsC)

201 This is how we're gonna weasel out of our promise to help-

US military warns Trump it needs more time to prepare for Iran strikes - report
Senior US defense officials warned President Donald Trump that more time is needed to prepare for potential strikes on Iran, according to reports.

https://tinyurl.com/5ecnvhy4
Posted by: Don Black

***

There are many ways to help. But right now the situation on the ground is a mess. Confusion, multiple reports, multiple cities. Any application of American power needs to be precise and supportive.

Posted by: Diogenes at January 11, 2026 03:35 PM (2WIwB)

202 The Rusted Spring
Yet it was the spring, a solitary, rusted coil, that revealed a tale of decay and neglect, a forgotten hero in this theater of domesticity. Once a vibrant, taut promise of functionality, it had succumbed to the insidious embrace of time. The rust, a mottled tapestry of orange and brown, spoke of wet season storms that dribbled through the cracks of the old wooden house, seeping into the very bones of its contents.

This forlorn spring, now curving with a languid surrender, not unlike the way an old man might yield to the weight of years, whispered softly of the culinary adventures it had once sprung into action for—lifting, grasping, and serving sustenance to nourished souls. It seemed to sigh, muffled and weary, a rust-laden witness to the life that ebbed around it, each squeak of its joints a protest against the years of disuse, a reminder that even the most mundane of objects held the memory of a thousand stories, each a thread in the fabric of a shared existence now faded into the fabric of the mundane.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at January 11, 2026 03:35 PM (2Ez/1)

203 >But Trump said we were locked and loaded and ready to go....
----

He says a lot of things.

Posted by: Don Black at January 11, 2026 03:35 PM (ZxPkt)

204
In its dereliction lay a beauty stark and poignant, as if to suggest that even in abandonment, even as it lay there, a mere shadow of its former self, it was still part of a continuum—a fragile link in a chain that bound yesterday to the twilight of a forgotten promise, echoing through the very air that once vibrated with the sounds of life and love.

fin

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at January 11, 2026 03:36 PM (2Ez/1)

205 NO SPRINGS!!!!

HAHAHAHA!

Posted by: Coily at January 11, 2026 03:36 PM (0aYVJ)

206 191 This is giving me a haddock.

That hurt me to my sole.

I've got a cure for that. Drop me a line.

Posted by: Roger at January 11, 2026 03:37 PM (nPp6w)

207 I never put kitchen tools in the dishwasher for this reason...
Posted by: Joe Kidd

It's called sanitizing for a reason. Washing stuff in lukewarm water will lead to illness and Death. Don't take chances.

A three compartment commercial sink, the last compartment is for water of 180 degrees. State, County inspectors insist on it.

Posted by: Better to Replace Tongs, Than Die A Painful Death!! at January 11, 2026 03:39 PM (oftw2)

208 They were tongs.
They were kitchen tongs.
They were rusty kitchen tongs.

Oh...
You said Faulkner.
My bad.

Posted by: Diogenes at January 11, 2026 03:40 PM (2WIwB)

209 What do people really want done anyway? Bombing key units? Sustained air operations? Targeted assassinations?
Posted by: Hungary '56 at January 11, 2026 03:34 PM (EfxsC)

I want us to clear the airspace enough to be able to land a couple of C-17’s in Tehran, packed full of rifles and ammo.

Posted by: Tom Servo at January 11, 2026 03:41 PM (FvUgT)

210 buy Edlund brand tongs
Posted by: mildy citrusy at January 11, 2026 02:06 PM

^^^ This.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at January 11, 2026 03:42 PM (svRCg)

211 In some ways Iran is like Tsarist Russia at the end.

Posted by: tubal at January 11, 2026 03:43 PM (pDt9x)

212 I should stop looking at X for a while. Come down off the ledge.

Posted by: Don Black at January 11, 2026 03:44 PM (ZxPkt)

213 Nice!

Went upstairs to put my laundry away, looked out the window and a beautiful rainbow, almost entirely visible end to end over the water.

God still loves us. Even though we suck.

Posted by: nurse ratched at January 11, 2026 03:44 PM (IhIKR)

214
CBD, you're gonna call me a cheap bastard. Just take an old used hacksaw blade, cut about a four inch section, bend it carefully around a broom handle until it's in a rough "u" shape. Press the ends together enough to insert into the end of the springless tongs. Push all the way down until the inside of the new hacksaw spring is seated on the hinge.

Now you got a new spring in yer tongs.

Posted by: BifBewalski - at January 11, 2026 03:44 PM (QVmho)

215 Buffalo defense is completely trash.

Posted by: Accomack at January 11, 2026 03:46 PM (8jVAy)

216 Buy the cheapest tongs possible? Throw them away when they give out? Repeat. This is heresy, I know.

Posted by: tubal at January 11, 2026 03:46 PM (pDt9x)

217 My first-world problem with pairs of tongs is ..... why are they called that? If you took them apart, would there be any use for a single tong? Would you even call it that? Why isn't the whole assembly referred to in the singular?

See also pairs of pliers, scissors, pants..... I guess a one-legged person could use a single pant.

Posted by: mikeski at January 11, 2026 03:46 PM (nhCoE)

218 No Springs!

Posted by: Coily the spring sprite at January 11, 2026 03:48 PM (pkeXY)

219 The feedlips look bent.
Posted by: toby928(c) at January 11, 2026 02:03 PM

This is why disciples of the Gub Thread have 5, and better 10, magazines for every hand cannon to accompany it to its watery grave.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at January 11, 2026 03:48 PM (9Oj10)

220 Bob Dole thinks Bob Dole would like to get a new spring in Bob Dole's tongs, if you know what Bob Dole's saying.

Posted by: The ghost of Bob Dole at January 11, 2026 03:48 PM (2Ez/1)

221
149 This is how we're gonna weasel out of our promise to help-

US military warns Trump it needs more time to prepare for Iran strikes - report
Senior US defense officials warned President Donald Trump that more time is needed to prepare for potential strikes on Iran, according to reports.

https://tinyurl.com/5ecnvhy4
Posted by: Don Black at January 11, 2026 03:07 PM

----------

I can't know what to make of this. Wouldn't this be a secret? Maybe misdirection.

And weaseling out is weaseling out. As far as general perception, it doesn't matter if there's an excuse.

Posted by: Semi-Literate Thug at January 11, 2026 03:49 PM (VWtfl)

222 Buffalo defense is completely trash.
Posted by: Accomack at January 11, 2026 03:46 PM

What about the bison defense?

Posted by: Duncanthrax at January 11, 2026 03:49 PM (9Oj10)

223 I watched some of the Amazon Prime sponsored football game last night. Third quarter in I realized that I don’t care about football at all anymore. Switched over to Person of Interest series instead.

Posted by: tubal at January 11, 2026 03:50 PM (pDt9x)

224 201 This is how we're gonna weasel out of our promise to help-

US military warns Trump it needs more time to prepare for Iran strikes - report
Senior US defense officials warned President Donald Trump that more time is needed to prepare for potential strikes on Iran, according to reports.

https://tinyurl.com/5ecnvhy4
Posted by: Don Black

Like we'd say were going in in 5 hours if we were ? Who were these Senior Defense Officials

Posted by: It's me donna at January 11, 2026 03:50 PM (VE6XX)

225 All this spring talk has me recoiling.
Posted by: scampydog

You'll bounce back.
Posted by: Roger

The key is to remain flexible.
Posted by: Sham Wower

Don't get wound up about it.
Posted by: Mike Hammer

On day you will be sprung from this semantic prison.
Posted by: Diogenes

Only if the Morons learn to leaf well enough alone.

Posted by: mikeski at January 11, 2026 03:50 PM (nhCoE)

226 fin

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at January 11, 2026 03:36 PM (2Ez/1)

++++

I felt bad enough tossing the Christmas tree that we had so much fun decorating, now you're making me feel morose about throwing out kitchen utensils. Will the guilt ever end?

Posted by: washrivergal at January 11, 2026 03:50 PM (1tnYn)

227 Will no one ever discuss the Tong Wars … ? They're … they're … well, kinda-sorta 'historical' … aren't they? Or is there some kinda 'anti-Chinkoiserie' stuff taking place … ?

Posted by: Dr_No at January 11, 2026 03:51 PM (ayRl+)

228 I felt bad enough tossing the Christmas tree that we had so much fun decorating, now you're making me feel morose about throwing out kitchen utensils. Will the guilt ever end?
Posted by: washrivergal at January 11, 2026 03:50 PM (1tnYn)

Our tree was gone on Dec. 26th along with all decorations

Posted by: It's me donna at January 11, 2026 03:51 PM (VE6XX)

229 I can't know what to make of this. Wouldn't this be a secret? Maybe misdirection.

And weaseling out is weaseling out. As far as general perception, it doesn't matter if there's an excuse.
Posted by: Semi-Literate Thug at January 11, 2026 03:49 PM (VWtfl)

There may not be much taste for invading Iran. I mean, outside of the neocons in Congress.

Posted by: Kindltot at January 11, 2026 03:52 PM (rbvCR)

230 Bison are very docile. You don’t need to defend against them.

Posted by: Accomack at January 11, 2026 03:53 PM (T8bqm)

231
Gaming headset companies always use cheap AF plastic on the bits that receive the most wear and tear. Gotta be deliberate.
Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at January 11, 2026 03:31 PM (f0sNM)

*whistles absently*

Posted by: Ford Motor Company at January 11, 2026 03:53 PM (y9nCu)

232 Iran >>> Eileen

Posted by: Duncanthrax at January 11, 2026 03:53 PM (9Oj10)

233 Anyone here want to invade Iran???

Posted by: tubal at January 11, 2026 03:54 PM (pDt9x)

234 Our tree was gone on Dec. 26th along with all decorations
Posted by: It's me donna at January 11, 2026 03:51 PM (VE6XX)

Yeah. I didn't feel like undecorating either. Whole thing straight into the pile.

Posted by: Reforger at January 11, 2026 03:54 PM (v8m2L)

235 All this spring talk has me recoiling.
Posted by: scampydog

You'll bounce back.
Posted by: Roger

The key is to remain flexible.
Posted by: Sham Wower

Don't get wound up about it.
Posted by: Mike Hammer

On day you will be sprung from this semantic prison.
Posted by: Diogenes

Only if the Morons learn to leaf well enough alone.
Posted by: mikeski at January 11, 2026 03:50 PM

Ask not for whom the Belleville toll. It vill toll for you.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at January 11, 2026 03:55 PM (svRCg)

236 Bison are very docile. You don’t need to defend against them.
Posted by: Accomack at January 11, 2026 03:53 PM

True. You can get a bison to do anything it wants to do.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at January 11, 2026 03:55 PM (9Oj10)

237
Yeah. I didn't feel like undecorating either. Whole thing straight into the pile.
Posted by: Reforger at January 11, 2026 03:54 PM (v8m2L)

Tree was tossed.. Decorations put away

Posted by: It's me donna at January 11, 2026 03:55 PM (VE6XX)

238
OT: Totally metal Lollipop Guild

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/0Sfwql9FLw4

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at January 11, 2026 03:55 PM (y9nCu)

239 Our tree was gone on Dec. 26th along with all decorations
Posted by: It's me donna

Utter madness!

Posted by: My Lights Still On!! at January 11, 2026 03:56 PM (oftw2)

240 Another meme on Marco Rubio latest job

https://tinyurl.com/42y2dxk9

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at January 11, 2026 03:56 PM (Nx5jP)

241 Bison bulls weigh a ton. Even docilely that could turn you into puree. Don’t pester the bison.

Posted by: tubal at January 11, 2026 03:56 PM (pDt9x)

242 Hawaiian Judges orders Trump fire Secretary Noem and replace her with a Dual leadership position in HLS with Mayorkas and Rep. Omar immediately.

This way Terrorists of Color will be protected from Donald "666" Trump and his evil plan to exterminate the "Mostly Peaceful" Islam Terrorists in the USA.

Posted by: CNN Breaking News at January 11, 2026 03:58 PM (J9q9v)

243 Try some Messer Meisters. No rust on my spring.

Posted by: Boss Moss at January 11, 2026 03:58 PM (r5QMG)

244 Oh, loook how fuzzy he is! Let me honk my horn!,

Posted by: Accomack Karen at January 11, 2026 03:58 PM (T8bqm)

245 It's called sanitizing for a reason. Washing stuff in lukewarm water will lead to illness and Death. Don't take chances.

A three compartment commercial sink, the last compartment is for water of 180 degrees. State, County inspectors insist on it.
Posted by: Better to Replace Tongs, Than Die A Painful Death!! at January 11, 2026 03:39 PM (oftw2)

Oh, illness and death. I'll remember that when I mark my 66th lap around the sun later this year. I like my chances so far....

Posted by: I got your state and county inspectors right here at January 11, 2026 03:59 PM (nbLIj)

246 Complete this sentence: "I once had a … "

Posted by: Dr_No at January 11, 2026 04:00 PM (ayRl+)

247 Everyone knows you should autoclave all utensils and flatware after every use.

Posted by: Aetius451AD Johnson's work phone at January 11, 2026 04:00 PM (zZu0s)

248 Deena Winter, the Minneapolis reporter accused of doxxing the ICE agent who shot Saint Renee looks exactly like you would expect her to look

https://tinyurl.com/3zzj8u2v

Posted by: Huck Follywood at January 11, 2026 04:00 PM (//n4s)

249 The Bison Defense Council was trapped North of the Tans-Contenental railroad when the final spike was driven. They declared that there are some lines they will not cross, froze to death the following winter and the defenseless Bison were soon nearly extinct.

Posted by: Reforger at January 11, 2026 04:00 PM (v8m2L)

250 Like the old saying “ That which does not kill us gives us bad diarrhea”

Posted by: tubal at January 11, 2026 04:01 PM (pDt9x)

251 FOOD NOOD

Posted by: Skip at January 11, 2026 04:01 PM (Ia/+0)

252 Little bit of Iron Oxide never hurt anyone....

Nude Fude

Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK) at January 11, 2026 04:01 PM (QGaXH)

253 That's a shame. A stainless steel spring doesn't cost much.

Posted by: Boss Moss at January 11, 2026 04:02 PM (r5QMG)

254 >>>All this spring talk has me recoiling.
Posted by: scampydog

You'll bounce back.
Posted by: Roger

The key is to remain flexible.
Posted by: Sham Wower

Don't get wound up about it.
Posted by: Mike Hammer

On day you will be sprung from this semantic prison.
Posted by: Diogenes

Only if the Morons learn to leaf well enough alone.
Posted by: mikeski at January 11, 2026 03:50 PM

Ask not for whom the Belleville toll. It vill toll for you.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState

>All of this spring talk is torquing my patience. Your slinky puns are loose shit.

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at January 11, 2026 04:06 PM (BSdIE)

255 209 What do people really want done anyway? Bombing key units? Sustained air operations? Targeted assassinations?
Posted by: Hungary '56 at January 11, 2026 03:34 PM (EfxsC)

I want us to clear the airspace enough to be able to land a couple of C-17’s in Tehran, packed full of rifles and ammo.
Posted by: Tom Servo at January 11, 2026 03:41 PM (FvUgT)

I'd think that controlling an airstrip would require both boots on the ground, in some number, and well-organized Iranian allies on the ground. I could be wrong. But I'm skeptical that air interdiction alone can make that possible in any kind of reliable way.

Posted by: Hungary '56 at January 11, 2026 04:10 PM (EfxsC)

256 We have satellites that can read a license plate we (Mil Intel) (Deltafors Donaltrum) know what's going on in Iran.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at January 11, 2026 04:10 PM (vPNoP)

257 255 209 What do people really want done anyway?
---

I want a good woman, a Tesla Optimus and a self driving car.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at January 11, 2026 04:12 PM (vPNoP)

258 later this year. I like my chances so far....
Posted by: I got your state and county inspectors right here

It's your funeral!

Posted by: Goodbury and Graves, Ltd. at January 11, 2026 04:13 PM (oftw2)

259 Amateur.

Posted by: Grendel at January 11, 2026 04:17 PM (oRAJ/)

260 Food?

Posted by: Accomack at January 11, 2026 04:25 PM (/Chlc)

261 >>> 84 Why did most flappers seem to be built like 12 year old boys?
Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at January 11, 2026 02:39 PM (zZu0s)

One of my fave parts of the movie Thoroughly Modern Millie with Julie Andrews is the opening montage where she gets all modernized, but struggles because her flapper beads can't hang straight! Because she has boobs.

Posted by: LizLem at January 11, 2026 04:29 PM (gWBY1)

262 A parting comment, familiar to vintage car fans, rust never sleeps.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at January 11, 2026 05:05 PM (XeU6L)

263 Whether we or/and Israel were on the ground the appearance, world wide, of them overcoming the evil empire themselves would be superior.

And whether we or/and Israel are there the Iranians are the one's getting killed, they are the one's taking it to the streets, they are the one's bringing down the Ayatollah.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at January 11, 2026 05:18 PM (vPNoP)

264 We have satellites that can read a license plate

They figured out how to overcome physics?

Posted by: Unknown Drip Under Pressure at January 11, 2026 05:44 PM (+4Cf6)

265 Whether we or/and Israel were on the ground the appearance, world wide, of them overcoming the evil empire themselves would be superior.

And whether we or/and Israel are there the Iranians are the one's getting killed, they are the one's taking it to the streets, they are the one's bringing down the Ayatollah.

Posted by: Braenyard

I'd expect Green Beanies to be there, possibly coming in from the Kurdish AOs.
One of their primary missions is using indigenous forces and weapons. Comms blackout is to their advantage.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at January 11, 2026 05:49 PM (/lPRQ)

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