First-World Problems...

This is a catastrophe of biblical proportions.

All right-thinking people know that burger toppings go...ON THE TOP!. Why else would they be called "toppings?" Sure, I guess it's allowed to put condiments on the bottom bun. But that is flirting with disaster and is a weak-willed accommodation to the revanchists in the toppings-on-the-bottom camp. They know that they have lost, but are clever, with their subtle subterfuge and propaganda.

Do we need a purge?

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 the reclusive French inventor of the sandal was Philippe Philoppe ?

Posted by: Ciampino - Computers can never replace human stupidity at October 27, 2024 02:00 PM (i0xsb)

2 One I want

Posted by: Skip at October 27, 2024 02:00 PM (fwDg9)

3
Condiment, white? Mayonnaise?

Sure, mayonnaise!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at October 27, 2024 02:02 PM (xG4kz)

4 I am making hoagie for lunch this week, hardly matters what order it goes in

Posted by: Skip at October 27, 2024 02:02 PM (fwDg9)

5 And as we all know from Sheldon Cooper, one never introduces the water-based condiments next to the bun. You might as well drag it through a car wash.

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:02 PM (xCA6C)

6 Where da fuk is the bacon?

Posted by: Tonypete at October 27, 2024 02:03 PM (WXNFJ)

7
Do we need a purge?

Could we have an upgrade to a horsewhipping?

Pleeeeeeeze!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at October 27, 2024 02:03 PM (xG4kz)

8 I have a biting problem so that something built like that means e bunch of stuff, usually including the tomato slice and also onion, end up dangling from my lips. Too much lubrication!

Posted by: Ciampino - Computers can never replace human stupidity, right at October 27, 2024 02:03 PM (i0xsb)

9 Bun bottom - burger- cheese -bacon- ketchup - salt and pepper - bun top. That's quite enough

Posted by: Smell the Glove at October 27, 2024 02:04 PM (aRslG)

10 Should the maple syrup be poured on the plate before setting the flapjack down? Or syrup poured on top of the stack? I say both!! I’m a revolutionary…

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at October 27, 2024 02:04 PM (ANuwa)

11 When I looked at the diagram, I shrugged and thought: well, chalk up another failure for moi.

Posted by: kallisto at October 27, 2024 02:04 PM (3ecIm)

12 Um nowhere in the Samich Blurprint do I read the word Angus!!!

Posted by: I'm Gumby Damn It! at October 27, 2024 02:04 PM (fzujD)

13 And as we all know from Sheldon Cooper, one never introduces the water-based condiments next to the bun. You might as well drag it through a car wash.

The cheese comes between the condiments and the bun so as to form a moisture-proof barrier. Come on, people, it's not that complicated.

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:04 PM (xCA6C)

14 I do not put lettuce on my burgers. Not because I do not like lettuce, but because it tends to make the experience messier as it slides around. Everything else should be above the burger and cheese.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Balding American at October 27, 2024 02:05 PM (Ad8y9)

15 This is a catastrophe of biblical proportions.

All right-thinking people know that burger toppings go...ON THE TOP!. Why else would they be called "toppings?"

These are the same people who think that TP should be loaded in the dispenser with the fresh squares in the back rather than the front.

Posted by: Darrell Harris at October 27, 2024 02:05 PM (FLsS9)

16 First of all, lettuce on a burger is wrong

my burger is, from the bottom up:

bun
mustard/relish
onion slice
beef patty
melted cheese slice
ketchup
bun

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 02:05 PM (/7KEl)

17 Too much lubrication!

You're right!

Posted by: Said Pete Butigieg, never. at October 27, 2024 02:05 PM (xCA6C)

18 I am making hoagie for lunch this week, hardly matters what order it goes in
Posted by: Skip

Whatever you do, don't make grinders, subs, heros, po' boys, torpedos or wedges.

Posted by: Tonypete at October 27, 2024 02:06 PM (WXNFJ)

19 Pickel slices on burgers blow..
-Dill spears and chips

Posted by: I'm Gumby Damn It! at October 27, 2024 02:06 PM (fzujD)

20 These are the same people who think that TP should be loaded in the dispenser with the fresh squares in the back rather than the front.

My wife is one. I'm considering divorcing her.

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:06 PM (xCA6C)

21 I guess we know what that bottom "condiment" is.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:06 PM (GtZ7X)

22 Just to be clear, will the food thread include a discussion of drywall?

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:07 PM (xCA6C)

23 I have a biting problem . . too much lubrication.
Posted by: Ciampino

There's the wind up, and the pitch!

Posted by: Tonypete at October 27, 2024 02:07 PM (WXNFJ)

24 the onion slice should be 1/4" thick.

the cheese should be American yellow- melts nicely

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 02:08 PM (/7KEl)

25 Never ketchup, that's reserved for the fries, depending on personal tastes (I do like the very hot ketchup on fries as a dip). If the meat is so bad that you need a condiment then blue cheese or ranch is great.

Posted by: Ciampino - Computers can lie like the best of them at October 27, 2024 02:09 PM (i0xsb)

26 the cheese should be American yellow- melts nicely

So does gallium, but I don't put it on my food.

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:09 PM (xCA6C)

27 I do not put lettuce on my burgers. Not because I do not like lettuce, but because it tends to make the experience messier as it slides around. Everything else should be above the burger and cheese.
Posted by: Pug Mahon, Balding American at October 27, 2024 02:05 PM (Ad8y9)

That's fair. I would prefer a single leaf of romaine, but most restaurants don't seem to know that romaine lettuce exists.

Me, I'm not a pickle guy, on any sammich. It's just too overpowering. I like pickles just fine, and don't tend to ask for places NOT to put them on burgers, but once the burger arrives, I take out the pickles and eat them separately.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:09 PM (GtZ7X)

28 In my experience, condiments on the top and bottom of a sandwich leads to a slippery mess with no structural integrity. This doesn't apply when using a split roll, and maybe doesn't apply to burgers, though
I'm skeptical.

Posted by: Grudge Harbor at October 27, 2024 02:09 PM (hCzfy)

29 Have you consulted with Schumer on this?

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at October 27, 2024 02:09 PM (3Y5XB)

30 I do not put lettuce on my burgers. Not because I do not like lettuce, but because it tends to make the experience messier as it slides around.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Balding American at October 27, 2024 02:05 PM (Ad8y9)

And to you point your pinky up at a rakish angle when you eat a burger?

There is a strong correlation between the messiness of the burger and the total enjoyment of the experience.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 02:10 PM (d9fT1)

31 Burger patty
Another burger patty
cheese
Fried egg
Onion ring
NO BUN

Posted by: vmom stabby stabby stabby stabby stabamillion at October 27, 2024 02:10 PM (6U1c2)

32 Butter is the only acceptable thing between the bottom bun and the burger, provided it goes onto a grilled or toasted bun.

Posted by: haffhowershower at October 27, 2024 02:10 PM (NMT5x)

33 Some moron left off the bacon.

Posted by: Eromero at October 27, 2024 02:10 PM (LHPAg)

34 I supposed instead of "toppings" they should be referred to as "interleavings" then.

Posted by: Kindltot at October 27, 2024 02:10 PM (D7oie)

35 I do not put lettuce on my burgers. Not because I do not like lettuce, but because it tends to make the experience messier as it slides around.

Do you deny them your essence?

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:10 PM (xCA6C)

36 will the food thread include a discussion of drywall?

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:07 PM (xCA6C)

Food imported from China?

Certainly!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 02:11 PM (d9fT1)

37
The Walk Away Self Locking car. Locks itself without using the remote. Randomly. So that when my keys are inside and I need something in it, it's locked.

It can't be changed or deactivated. "Oh no, it's a great feature. You definitely need it." No, I don't.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at October 27, 2024 02:11 PM (EsZUh)

38

Anyone who puts toppings on the bottom is a bottom.

Posted by: Elderly Git at October 27, 2024 02:11 PM (YdEcD)

39 These are the same people who think that TP should be loaded in the dispenser with the fresh squares in the back rather than the front.
Posted by: Darrell Harris at October 27, 2024 02:05 PM (FLsS9)

You wipe?

Gay!

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:11 PM (GtZ7X)

40 Food thread before the Food Thread. Gluttony

Posted by: Braenyard at October 27, 2024 02:12 PM (Dng1D)

41 Making hamburgers I limit it to onion, pickles, cheese and ketchup, of course a hamburger out will have all the above and that's fine, just don't do that for myself.

Posted by: Skip at October 27, 2024 02:12 PM (fwDg9)

42 Also, no pickle, no tomato.

And whichever layer you put them in (I am on top of the cheese on the burger man myself) they have to be together so the flavors compliment one another and hit at the same time.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:12 PM (y31cs)

43 I usually put lettuce on the bun, then condiments, so the bun doesn't get soggy.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:12 PM (kpS4V)

44
Please to replace all non-burger patty ingredients except bun with burger patties.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at October 27, 2024 02:12 PM (EsZUh)

45 Anyone who puts toppings on the bottom is a bottom.

Posted by: Elderly Git

Thoughts on powerful toppings, like jalapeños?

Posted by: Grudge Harbor at October 27, 2024 02:13 PM (hCzfy)

46

Being married to a Filipina I have learned to use spicy Banana Ketchup. Very tasty. Read it's history, very interesting.

Posted by: My Pimp Shot My Dealer at October 27, 2024 02:13 PM (YdEcD)

47 Or
Burger patty
Cheese
Sliced steak
More cheese
Caramelized onion

Posted by: vmom stabby stabby stabby stabby stabamillion at October 27, 2024 02:13 PM (6U1c2)

48 Mayo kind of demands lettuce. It feels... wrong somehow to put mayo on a burger without it. Like you are some sort of greasy commie.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:14 PM (y31cs)

49 The Walk Away Self Locking car. Locks itself without using the remote. Randomly. So that when my keys are inside and I need something in it, it's locked.

It can't be changed or deactivated. "Oh no, it's a great feature. You definitely need it." No, I don't.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at October 27, 2024 02:11 PM (EsZUh)

Hmmm, I'd have to test it, but I'm sure my vehicle will NOT lock with the keys in it, except by hitting the button on the door. Unless the vehicle is moving, then it self locks after it hits something like 9 MPH.

Why 9 and not 10? Dunno, maybe because it's Japanese, and they use some sort of ancient Asian secret numbering system.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:14 PM (GtZ7X)

50 39 These are the same people who think that TP should be loaded in the dispenser with the fresh squares in the back rather than the front.
Posted by: Darrell Harris
------------

Women load the roll with the squares to the back.
Men load the roll with the squares to the front.
_Science

Posted by: Braenyard at October 27, 2024 02:14 PM (Dng1D)

51 47 Or
Burger patty
Cheese
Sliced steak
More cheese
Caramelized onion
Posted by: vmom stabby stabby stabby stabby stabamillion at October 27, 2024 02:13 PM (6U1c2)

If you are going from bottom to top, I'll agree.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:15 PM (y31cs)

52 Jersey Shore Summertime Burger
#1 bakery kaiser roll
#2 Angus beef patty cooked on a charcoal BBQ grill
#3 Special blend marinade applied with a brush (A-1, Lee and Perrins, Sweet Baby Rays with a squirt of Ketchup)
#4 real cheddar cheese slice
#5 Bermuda or (red onion) slice
#^ Lettuce optional
#7 Kaiser roll hat toasted lightly on said grill

Posted by: I'm Gumby Damn It! at October 27, 2024 02:15 PM (fzujD)

53 I usually put lettuce on the bun, then condiments, so the bun doesn't get soggy.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:12 PM (kpS4V)

If you eat fast enough the bun never gets soggy.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:15 PM (GtZ7X)

54 The Walk Away Self Locking car. Locks itself without using the remote. Randomly. So that when my keys are inside and I need something in it, it's locked.

It can't be changed or deactivated. "Oh no, it's a great feature. You definitely need it." No, I don't.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at October 27, 2024 02:11 PM (EsZUh)

There is a Youtbue channel dedicated to rebuilding a Mini into a rally car that involves rebuilding the instrument cluster, which requires fabbing a replacement circuit board.

At some point this is going to be the new "classic car shop" deal to keep those MPV mini-vans and Ford Rangers running for another 20 years

Posted by: Kindltot at October 27, 2024 02:16 PM (D7oie)

55 I put the bottom bun on top of the cheese, then flip it over and put the condiments on top. That way your bun doesn’t stick to the cheese and make a sticky mess.

Posted by: Marty at October 27, 2024 02:16 PM (ELmyf)

56 20 These are the same people who think that TP should be loaded in the dispenser with the fresh squares in the back rather than the front.

My wife is one. I'm considering divorcing her.

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:06 PM (xCA6C)
----
The alternative to divorce is get a cat. On second thoughts, get several cats.
After they are done using that ginormous pack of TP you bought, as a scratching post, you put one of those semi-shredded rolls in use with the tatters hanging in front. The next time you visit the boghole your roll is in a messed up pile on the floor. Sometimes the culprit gets a claw stuck in that hanging sheet and then runs away, unraveling the whole roll as it streaks by you.

Posted by: Ciampino - Computers you can't live with them ... at October 27, 2024 02:16 PM (i0xsb)

57 If you eat fast enough the bun never gets soggy.
Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:15 PM (GtZ7X)

Ignore the bun, order the funnel and a rammer?

Posted by: Kindltot at October 27, 2024 02:16 PM (D7oie)

58 Trying to think of a 1WP, it occurs to me I'm pretty fortunate, all things considered

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 02:16 PM (/7KEl)

59 I like burgers lots, but it is easy or maybe easier to brown the burger and make some sort of hoosh or casserole, SOS, Chili, or just pour a can of baked-beans in with onions and doctor it up. "Salisbury steak" w/ mashed taters and gravy, etc.

Posted by: Common Tater at October 27, 2024 02:17 PM (0fei9)

60 My FWP was my own fogey brain. When I rented a car in Texas, a Hyundai Sonata, I was flummoxed trying to find the gear shift. It ended up being this little flat box on the right side of the steering column that you tilt up for Drive, down for Reverse, and push in for Park. I got used to it after a day and genuinely like driving the Sonata, but what a ridiculous design! Who okayed this Fisher-Price shit?

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:17 PM (kpS4V)

61 37
The Walk Away Self Locking car. Locks itself without using the remote. Randomly. So that when my keys are inside and I need something in it, it's locked.

It can't be changed or deactivated. "Oh no, it's a great feature. You definitely need it." No, I don't.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at October 27, 2024 02:11 PM (EsZUh)

-AAA has entered the chat

Posted by: I'm Gumby Damn It! at October 27, 2024 02:17 PM (fzujD)

62 Lettuce and mayo under the burger keep the bottom bun from getting soaked, but the tomatoes should be on top.

Posted by: Rob Crawford at October 27, 2024 02:17 PM (UJJWg)

63 I just found out from my grandson that there is a “secret menu” at In’n’Out burger. The Dutchman allows you to get a burger with either top bun or both buns replaced by a large grilled onion slice. And then there are the animal fries.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 27, 2024 02:17 PM (S6gqv)

64 I am going to throw this out here because I am feeling spicy today!

Ozery Bakery multi grain thins, homemade veggie burger, grilled onions, lettuce.

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:18 PM (p4NUW)

65 Speaking of FWP, anyone in a drive through lane, who asks them to remove/replace items on your burger (or whatever) should be shot, and have a magnet come from above, and pull their useless vehicle from the line.

If you want them to go off menu GO INSIDE YOU COMMUNIST PIECE OF SHIT MAGGOT!

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:18 PM (GtZ7X)

66 There is a strong correlation between the messiness of the burger and the total enjoyment of the experience.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 02:10 PM (d9fT1)

Marcel Ledbetter always got mustard sauce in his eyebrows when he ate mustard sardines.
- J. Clower PBUH

Posted by: Eromero at October 27, 2024 02:19 PM (LHPAg)

67 I'm also not down with keyless cars. I'm clinging to my 2018 Lesbaru because it has the right percentage of old school to new tech.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:19 PM (kpS4V)

68 Hmmm, I'd have to test it, but I'm sure my vehicle will NOT lock with the keys in it, except by hitting the button on the door. Unless the vehicle is moving, then it self locks after it hits something like 9 MPH.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:14 PM (GtZ7X)
-

Mine will only lock from the outside when I press the FOB button. It will NOT lock if I press the door button.

So either someone is in the car with the inside key or someone else has a key on the outside.

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at October 27, 2024 02:20 PM (3Y5XB)

69 60 My FWP was my own fogey brain. When I rented a car in Texas, a Hyundai Sonata, I was flummoxed trying to find the gear shift. It ended up being this little flat box on the right side of the steering column that you tilt up for Drive, down for Reverse, and push in for Park. I got used to it after a day and genuinely like driving the Sonata, but what a ridiculous design! Who okayed this Fisher-Price shit?
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:17 PM (kpS4V)

Paddle shift and even the Edsel's push button transmission are better than that.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:20 PM (y31cs)

70 Blue cheese, bacon and chipotle mayo.

Makes Homer noises

Posted by: JackStraw at October 27, 2024 02:20 PM (LkLld)

71 I got used to it after a day and genuinely like driving the Sonata, but what a ridiculous design! Who okayed this Fisher-Price shit?

My daughter now has kids, and she's getting e-mails from FP saying "you loved us as a kid, and we're still here". They're obviously playing on nostalgia to get you to but their stuff. It's a bit creepy, but probably a solid marketing ploy to sell toys. It may be less efficient for cars.

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:21 PM (xCA6C)

72 Kindlot - the use of Electrolytic capacitors with cars and trucks, a whole cottage industry of getting a "rebuilt" ECU or magic box is predicated on this. Anything built after about 1985 is going to have this problem sooner or later.

They are easy and inexpensive to replace, and anyone that knows how to solder can save hundreds or even thousands by replacing these. Ordinarily 10 years would be the expected lifespan of an electrolytic capacitor, unless it was made to Mil-spec standards. All these proprietary boards and sensors and gee-gaws need to have clean filtered DC power.

Posted by: Common Tater at October 27, 2024 02:21 PM (0fei9)

73 50 39 These are the same people who think that TP should be loaded in the dispenser with the fresh squares in the back rather than the front.
Posted by: Darrell Harris
------------

Women load the roll with the squares to the back.
Men load the roll with the squares to the front.
_Science

Posted by: Braenyard at October 27, 2024 02:14 PM (Dng1D)
----
See #56
Cats prefer the way Men do it.

Posted by: Ciampino - Computers you can't live without them ... at October 27, 2024 02:21 PM (i0xsb)

74 I kinda wonder if all of us realize just how much we are blessed to be afflicted by "first world problems"? The people who post here obviously are, it's everyone else I'm curious about.

Posted by: IRONGRAMPA at October 27, 2024 02:21 PM (hKoQL)

75 64 I am going to throw this out here because I am feeling spicy today!

Ozery Bakery multi grain thins, homemade veggie burger, grilled onions, lettuce.
Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:18 PM (p4NUW)

'Veggie burger'

*single tears rolls down God's cheek*

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:22 PM (y31cs)

76 Double meat, double cheese with pickle and tomato. Mayo for the condiment.

Posted by: Ben Had at October 27, 2024 02:22 PM (t8vHj)

77 If you eat fast enough the bun never gets soggy.
Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:15 PM (GtZ7X)

Ignore the bun, order the funnel and a rammer?
Posted by: Kindltot at October 27, 2024 02:16 PM (D7oie)

There's a Dr. Steve Brule "For Your Health" segment, where he recommends getting a second stomach installed, where you can eat all the bad food you want, and have it come out a flap, so you never have to deal with the calories and other bad content.

I want one of those.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:22 PM (GtZ7X)

78 Top to bottom

Bun
Mayo
Lettuce
Tomato
Pickles
Onion
Bacon
Cheese
Meat
Mustard
Bun

Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 02:22 PM (1wZKM)

79 > I'm clinging to my 2018 Lesbaru because it has the right percentage of old school to new tech.
---

that's why I keep my '04 F150
it's got a heater and a cigarette lighter
spared no expense

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 02:23 PM (/7KEl)

80 Women load the roll with the squares to the back.
Men load the roll with the squares to the front.
_Science
Posted by: Braenyard at October 27, 2024 02:14 PM (Dng1D)

This is a lie. My grandmothers, aunts, and mother all pit it the correct way.

Moms who put it the wrong way are trying to avoid the occasional cascade of TP caused by small hands rolling too much. They "choose their battles" by not insisting their spawn re-roll the paper.

And thus is civilization destroyed.

😉

Posted by: NaughtyPine at October 27, 2024 02:23 PM (UtssP)

81 Putting some spread on the bottom bun is perfectly acceptable. Mustard or mayo on the bottom and catsup on top works very nicely. Also, a bed of lettuce on the bottom is not a problem. But clearly piling up tomatoes on the bottom is an obvious no go. They make for too uneven of a surface for building the rest of the burger.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 27, 2024 02:23 PM (klJTj)

82 The mayonnaise goes on the bottom bun along with the diced onion, the ketchup on the top, surmounting the lettuce, tomato, and sliced onion. Cheese melted onto however many patties you got.

The more varieties of onion the better. Even fried onion rings.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:23 PM (aD39U)

83
Supposedly a 5pm appearance for the president at MSG, but Elon will be on stage before that. And others.

Posted by: Soothsayer at October 27, 2024 02:23 PM (xTbNp)

84 Pug Mahon, Balding American at October 27, 2024 02:05 PM (Ad8y9)

And to you point your pinky up at a rakish angle when you eat a burger?

There is a strong correlation between the messiness of the burger and the total enjoyment of the experience.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 02:10 PM (d9fT1)
--
No, but I have a rather shaggy beard, and no dog to lick my face after I eat. And at a restaurant it's even more problematic.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Balding American at October 27, 2024 02:23 PM (Ad8y9)

85 If you add am over easy egg, top or bottom?

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:24 PM (aD39U)

86 >Ozery Bakery multi grain thins, homemade veggie burger, grilled onions, lettuce.
Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:18 PM (p4NUW)

---

sounds kinda girly

oh wait

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 02:24 PM (/7KEl)

87 Lettuce, which serves no other purpose as it has almost no nutrients and is essentially slow water, goes on the bottom to collect the meat juices so that the bottom bun doesn't get soggy. The rest of the construction is up to you, but lettuce--bottom.

Might as well put the tomatoes do there too, unless the weight helps to support your other toppings, and for the same reasons. The American Beefsteak tomato travels well but it has no damn flavor. If you got a better varietal, feature that fucker near the top to remind the eaters what tomatoes should taste like.

It goes without saying that anyone ordering an burger using the word "well" should be ejected from the event as politely as possible and as violently as necessary. Even if they live there.

Posted by: bittergeek at October 27, 2024 02:24 PM (3SsGZ)

88 The only condiment I'd put on the bottom is the mayo, to act as a moisture barrier for the bottom bun so it doesn't get soggy and fall apart.

All the rest go on top as the good Lord intended.

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at October 27, 2024 02:24 PM (/HDaX)

89 I got a Camry as a loaner while my truck was in the shop getting a new clutch. I think it took me a good ten minutes to figure out that I had to put my foot on the brake to start it.

Posted by: Halfhand at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (fSRpP)

90 Putting some spread on the bottom bun is perfectly acceptable. Mustard or mayo on the bottom and catsup on top works very nicely.

*side-eyes person who says "catsup" instead of "ketchup", looking for indications of homosexuality*

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (xCA6C)

91 I'm also not down with keyless cars. I'm clinging to my 2018 Lesbaru because it has the right percentage of old school to new tech.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:19 PM (kpS4V)

I am clinging to my 1999 Ford Ranger pickup because it still runs, in spite of its current creeping electronic ataxia.

At this point, almost every time I put it in reverse, the driver's side window spontaneously rolls down a half inch. A month ago, I discovered that to get the windshield wipers to run, I had to turn the car off, and then back on again.

I suspect this is what living on the Russian Mir station was like.

Posted by: Kindltot at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (D7oie)

92 And ALWAYS

cut the burger in half before eating.

Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (1wZKM)

93 Never should you ever stack any wet element on cheese unless you like having a slimy mess on your cheeseburger. Gives me shivers just to think about it.

Posted by: huerfano at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (VGOMa)

94 Mine will only lock from the outside when I press the FOB button. It will NOT lock if I press the door button.

So either someone is in the car with the inside key or someone else has a key on the outside.
Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at October 27, 2024 02:20 PM (3Y5XB)

During my last move, I was packing boxes in the trunk of my car, and when I tried to close the trunk, it wouldn't! I kept checking to see if something was blocking the latch or a sensor or something, or if I had to drive the thing off a cliff and get a new one.

Turns out in one of the boxes I had my spare key packed away. So the trunk KNEW that, and wouldn't close.

Smart trunk!

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (GtZ7X)

95 In my house it's easy. My wife NEVER loads the TP. Just puts it on the counter. So it's my call; the proper overhand fashion.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Balding American at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (Ad8y9)

96 Putting fried potatoes on a burger is an abomination before the Lord.

I believe that is in Deuteronomy.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (aD39U)

97 Sorry for jumping the 100 comment rule but this Harris supporter SCREAMING IN THE FACE OF A TODDLER has had my blood boiling since last night (link to X)

https://twtr.to/djqGi

Out greatest enemy is not China or Iran. It is a 25 year old liberal white girl whose Prozac prescription has run out.

Posted by: Candidus at October 27, 2024 02:26 PM (eqAj8)

98 89 I got a Camry as a loaner while my truck was in the shop getting a new clutch. I think it took me a good ten minutes to figure out that I had to put my foot on the brake to start it.
Posted by: Halfhand at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (fSRpP)

Huh. Kind of like pushing in the clutch.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:26 PM (y31cs)

99 Might as well put the tomatoes do there too, unless the weight helps to support your other toppings, and for the same reasons.

Ah, the hamburger center-of-gravity argument.

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:26 PM (xCA6C)

100 92 And ALWAYS

cut the burger in half before eating.
Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (1wZKM)

Subs, yes. Burgers... sorry my mind is rebooting at the thought.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:27 PM (y31cs)

101 Huh. Kind of like pushing in the clutch.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:26 PM (y31cs)

I hate that interlock. Sometimes you need the starter motor to drag your old dead truck off the road onto the shoulder.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:27 PM (aD39U)

102 75 64 I am going to throw this out here because I am feeling spicy today!

Ozery Bakery multi grain thins, homemade veggie burger, grilled onions, lettuce.
Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:18 PM (p4NUW)

'Veggie burger'

*single tears rolls down God's cheek*
Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27

If it wasn’t so easy to hide a body on CHQ’s ranch, I would bring some to the next MoMe. If I could get people to try the homemade ones, they would realize how yummy they are. Not enough to forgo cheeseburgers entirely, but they are good!

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:27 PM (p4NUW)

103 36 will the food thread include a discussion of drywall?

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:07 PM (xCA6C)

Food imported from China?

Certainly!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 02:11 PM (d9fT1)
----
I'll throw in some melamine as well if you like. Protein you know (well, just nitrogen but the analyzer doesn't differentiate).

Posted by: Ciampino - See canned catfood from China at October 27, 2024 02:28 PM (i0xsb)

104 78 Top to bottom

Bun
Mayo
Lettuce
Tomato
Pickles
Onion
Bacon
Cheese
Meat
Mustard
Bun
Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 02:22 PM (1wZKM
Special sauce. You forgot. Hey Willie!
- Special K

Posted by: Eromero at October 27, 2024 02:28 PM (LHPAg)

105 92 And ALWAYS

cut the burger in half before eating.

Nonsense. Whether to cut or not clearly depends on the height to width ratio. Cutting very tall burgers results in an impossibly unstable configuration.

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:28 PM (xCA6C)

106
At this point, almost every time I put it in reverse, the driver's side window spontaneously rolls down a half inch. A month ago, I discovered that to get the windshield wipers to run, I had to turn the car off, and then back on again.

Posted by: Kindltot

Sounds like you have corroded wires/terminals.
Does the windshield leak? Is the carpet damp after it rains?

Posted by: Soothsayer at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (xTbNp)

107 And ladies, I love you all sexually, but you really don't get a say in any of this.

A burger can be... and perhaps SHOULD be messy eating. If you don't get some on your hands, you've done it wrong. If you don't get some of it dripping on your shirt, you might be gay.

Or female. Which, when it comes to burgers, is pretty much the same thing.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (GtZ7X)

108 >>I got a Camry as a loaner while my truck was in the shop getting a new clutch. I think it took me a good ten minutes to figure out that I had to put my foot on the brake to start it.

I rent cars frequently when I travel for business. It seems like they are going out of their way to make them a pain in the ass to figure out these days. Even figuring out how to open gas tank flap can be a workout.

Posted by: JackStraw at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (LkLld)

109 *single tears rolls down God's cheek*
Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27

If it wasn’t so easy to hide a body on CHQ’s ranch, I would bring some to the next MoMe. If I could get people to try the homemade ones, they would realize how yummy they are. Not enough to forgo cheeseburgers entirely, but they are good!
Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:27 PM (p4NUW)

And this is why we fail.

Posted by: Yoda at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (y31cs)

110 Mmmm. Having crinkle-cut sweet potato fries with smoky chipotle ketchup.

Had to bake them to make room in the freezer, see....

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (kpS4V)

111 Always been more concerned if there's paper, rather than which way it came off the roll.

Posted by: IRONGRAMPA at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (hKoQL)

112 I think that people who cut the burger in half are the same people who wedge their grilled cheese sandwiches.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (aD39U)

113 Didn’t McDonald’s offer a burger years ago delivered to you in two compartments… the hot side hot and the cold side cold? I forget the name… the Mc-something….

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at October 27, 2024 02:31 PM (ZtAny)

114
Sorry, typed too fast. Meant, when my keys are inside the house.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at October 27, 2024 02:31 PM (EsZUh)

115 *checks Piper's MoMe invitation for even mentioning veggie burger*

Posted by: Ben Had at October 27, 2024 02:31 PM (t8vHj)

116 Turns out in one of the boxes I had my spare key packed away. So the trunk KNEW that, and wouldn't close.

Smart trunk!
Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (GtZ7X)
-

If a key's in the car, my trunk will close but not lock. Same as with the doors. Again, anyone with another key can lock/unlock everything using another FOB key.

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at October 27, 2024 02:31 PM (3Y5XB)

117 wedge their grilled cheese sandwiches.
Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (aD39U)

I do that: one wedge on either dies of my bowl of tomato soup.

Hmm. Might be a good dinner this evening.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Balding American at October 27, 2024 02:31 PM (Ad8y9)

118 I got a Camry as a loaner while my truck was in the shop getting a new clutch. I think it took me a good ten minutes to figure out that I had to put my foot on the brake to start it.
Posted by: Halfhand at October 27, 2024 02:25 PM (fSRpP)

Huh. Kind of like pushing in the clutch.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:26 PM (y31cs)

My last stick, you had to do both clutch and brake.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (GtZ7X)

119 One of my pet peeves is that Mrs928 always buys the smaller burger buns. I like the large ones.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (aD39U)

120 I think it took me a good ten minutes to figure out that I had to put my foot on the brake to start it.
----

Yup. And there was no driver's manual, because only Olds read books. Thank God for YouTube.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (kpS4V)

121 107

And ladies, I love you all sexually, but

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (GtZ7X)

Burt, I view you as one of my grey box big brothers, or maybe little brother depending on which side of 29 you are, so now I need a bleach cleanse.

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (p4NUW)

122 I do that: one wedge on either dies of my bowl of tomato soup.

I think you meant your tomato opus.

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (xCA6C)

123 "The Walk Away Self Locking car."

Hadrian, that happened to my husband at the self-service car wash. With his phone AND keys in the car. He had to borrow a cell phone from a tiny little Asian grandma to call me. (He's a very large and potentially scary person so I am grateful she also realized he's a sweetheart.)

I had to drive 10 miles to unlock everything for him. Lesson learned.

Posted by: Art Rondelet of Malmsey at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (FEVMW)

124
Every morning (when it is still dark out), without fail, there's always at least one dunce I see on my commute with no lights on.

Oh, but this dunce *thinks* his/her lights are on because the dash lights are on and the DRL's are on. But, no taillights illuminated.

DRL = daytime running lamps, for "safety"

Posted by: Soothsayer at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (xTbNp)

125 >>One of my pet peeves is that Mrs928 always buys the smaller burger buns. I like the large ones.

You like big buns?

Posted by: JackStraw at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (LkLld)

126 There is a strong correlation between the messiness of the burger and the total enjoyment of the experience.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

Ergo your limitations on 'toppings' is counter to total enjoyment.

You need to add to the possible toppings.
Whole green peppers
Grilled onions
Sauteed mushrooms
Bacon
Avocado slices
The above are, of course, in addition to the staid toppings used by those with less culinary imagination: cheese (preferably pepper jack or ghost pepper jack), lettuce, tomato, pickle, and mustard and mayo.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at October 27, 2024 02:33 PM (Iq0J2)

127 wedge their grilled cheese sandwiches.
Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (aD39U)

This is the only way to cut grilled cheese. All other ways are wrong.

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:33 PM (p4NUW)

128 112 I think that people who cut the burger in half are the same people who wedge their grilled cheese sandwiches.
Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (aD39U)

Cutting a burger in half is of the Devil.

Cutting a grilled cheese sandwich into a triangle is of God. Mammaw always did that. Somehow it always tasted better. Cheapest government cheese and bread, but her grilled cheese were amazing. I would love to eat one again, just once.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:33 PM (y31cs)

129 I think you meant your tomato opus.
Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (xCA6C)

Opus's mom's last name was Bougm.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Balding American at October 27, 2024 02:33 PM (Ad8y9)

130 Piper,
Love ya, lady, but you're seriously pushing it.

Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 02:33 PM (1wZKM)

131 Mmmm. Having crinkle-cut sweet potato fries with smoky chipotle ketchup.

Had to bake them to make room in the freezer, see....
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (kpS4V)

Sufficient justification in my book. Use it all the time.

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at October 27, 2024 02:33 PM (/HDaX)

132 I worked at Whataburger and the 1970s, and yes you put the mustard or Mayo or ketchup on the top bun then you put lettuce then onions, then tomatoes and then pickles. The Patty with cheese goes next and then the bottom bun.

Posted by: Happy at October 27, 2024 02:34 PM (V8q1L)

133 125
You like big buns?
Posted by: JackStraw

And he cannot lie

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:34 PM (p4NUW)

134 I’m having hot links, catfish, chicken livers, peppers, and chocolate pie.

Posted by: Eromero at October 27, 2024 02:34 PM (LHPAg)

135 FWP - a newer euro car with a heads-up display that occasionally starts up in euro mode, detecting/displaying speed signs with their red-ringed equivalent. Definitely a software issue. Dealer can't fix it.

It used to cause the whole infotainment system to reboot after a few minutes, but now it just corrects itself after several seconds.

Posted by: Grudge Harbor at October 27, 2024 02:34 PM (hCzfy)

136 One of my pet peeves is that Mrs928 always buys the smaller burger buns. I like the large ones.

My wife used to buy the cheap packs of little, thin buns. As soon as you built a burger on them, they turned into a white, gloppy, 2-dimensional disk. I finally prevailed on her to get the larger brioche buns and find that my life is now much more fulfilling.

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:34 PM (xCA6C)

137 I'm Big Tent when it comes to burgers. IDIC and all that. 🖖🏻

Beef, turkey, lamb, veggie, even grilled portobello caps!

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:34 PM (kpS4V)

138 this Harris supporter SCREAMING IN THE FACE OF A TODDLER has had my blood boiling

Yeah, nice rack and ass though.

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in Solidarity with the Struggle at October 27, 2024 02:34 PM (xKEhr)

139 My FWP. My 2003 pickup needs repair. It was sickly when I last used it but got the BAT and horses home. Now it will not even start. Sigh, my sister said I should buy a new one. Maybe I will consider getting a new to me used one. I'd sure like to stick with a model old enough to not have the DEF feature. And I have to find a mobile mechanic or get the pickup towed now. Le sigh.

Posted by: PaleRider at October 27, 2024 02:35 PM (CKOCg)

140
A Ford pickup, for example, is set by the factory to flash the lights and beep the blasted horn EVERY time the door opens/closes.

Stupid.

So, if you go out to your stupid truck at 10pm because you forgot your tampons, you just woke the neighbors and all the dogs are barking.

Posted by: Soothsayer at October 27, 2024 02:35 PM (xTbNp)

141 >I think it took me a good ten minutes to figure out that I had to put my foot on the brake to start it.
---

like a school bus
cool

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 02:35 PM (/7KEl)

142 If a key's in the car, my trunk will close but not lock. Same as with the doors. Again, anyone with another key can lock/unlock everything using another FOB key.
Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at October 27, 2024 02:31 PM (3Y5XB)

I had a car years ago, I started it on a cold winter's day, went inside to let it warm up, and get the kids out the door.

The damn thing locked itself (with the key in the ignition) after a while, and even with the spare key (which I had to hunt down), it wouldn't unlock. Had to get a locksmith to come out and get it open.

On the bright side, it was nice and warm when we finally got in.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:35 PM (GtZ7X)

143 Sounds like you have corroded wires/terminals.
Does the windshield leak? Is the carpet damp after it rains?
Posted by: Soothsayer at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (xTbNp)

The instrument cluster doesn't light up, so I suspect it is a fault in there, though it may be in the driver side door. It could be in with one of the fuse boxes, or a worn wires in the wiring harness that got pinched when some conduit got snagged too. It is a nice pickup that got parked for a long time after the 4x4 got roached into jagged metal and I got it for less than what the repair cost me. It eats the hills and dirt roads like an RC car.
It doesn't leak as far as I can tell, and I had it parked unused for two years trying to figure out what to do about it.

Posted by: Kindltot at October 27, 2024 02:35 PM (D7oie)

144 My last stick, you had to do both clutch and brake.
Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (GtZ7X)

That is just a silly idea.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:35 PM (y31cs)

145 >>One of my pet peeves is that Mrs928 always buys the smaller burger buns. I like the large ones.

You like big buns?
Posted by: JackStraw at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (LkLld)

Like Ross and Rachel’s daughter… all about the butt (Friends reference). I like big butts and I cannot lie….

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at October 27, 2024 02:35 PM (ZtAny)

146 130 Piper,
Love ya, lady, but you're seriously pushing it.
Posted by: nurse ratched at

I told you I was in a mood today! This is why we should live closer you know I am not a drinker, but this is one of those days I would grab a bottle of wine and show up at your door.

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:35 PM (p4NUW)

147 Learn to share, Eromero.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:36 PM (kpS4V)

148 My last stick, you had to do both clutch and brake.
Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (GtZ7X)

Come to think of it, my last two sticks (96 Corolla DX and 2002 Corolla S) were that way.

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at October 27, 2024 02:36 PM (/HDaX)

149 One word: Autoclosing trunks.

True story, my mother bought a Caddy that had the trunk that you close, and then it mechanically pulls down to seal up tight. She discovered this when she closed the trunk at the grocery store and it didn't go all the way down so she tried to raise it back up, just as the motor started grinding it down, trapping and squeezing the fingers of her left hand. In her shock and pain she dropped the car keys just out of reach. She had to holler until another customer in the parking lot came to her aid.

Luckily he didn't just take her purse.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:36 PM (aD39U)

150 Piper,
Love ya, lady, but you're seriously pushing it.
Posted by: nurse ratched

CATFIGHT!!

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in Solidarity with the Struggle at October 27, 2024 02:37 PM (xKEhr)

151 Brioche burger buns.

Posted by: JackStraw at October 27, 2024 02:37 PM (LkLld)

152 137 I'm Big Tent when it comes to burgers. IDIC and all that. 🖖🏻

Beef, turkey, lamb, veggie, even grilled portobello caps!
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:34 PM (kpS4V)

There can be no compromise with veggie evil.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:38 PM (y31cs)

153 Cutting a burger in half is of the Devil.

This is correct.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory, red heifer owner at October 27, 2024 02:38 PM (dR6yv)

154 I told you I was in a mood today! This is why we should live closer you know I am not a drinker, but this is one of those days I would grab a bottle of wine and show up at your door.
Posted by: Piper

I just made a pot of chili and some cornbread. #1 son and I will watch the Seahawks lose to the Bills.

Bring Mexican beer and lime.

Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 02:38 PM (1wZKM)

155 150 Piper,
Love ya, lady, but you're seriously pushing it.
Posted by: nurse ratched

CATFIGHT!!
Posted by: Commissar of

No way in hades, you have no idea how much I love Nurse and her spirit.

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:38 PM (p4NUW)

156 128 112 I think that people who cut the burger in half are the same people who wedge their grilled cheese sandwiches.
Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (aD39U)

Cutting a burger in half is of the Devil.

Cutting a grilled cheese sandwich into a triangle is of God. Mammaw always did that. Somehow it always tasted better. Cheapest government cheese and bread, but her grilled cheese were amazing. I would love to eat one again, just once.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:33 PM (y31cs)
I believe Mammaw will meet you with a sandwich in her kitchen right inside the gate, and she’ll might have tomato soup too!

Posted by: Eromero at October 27, 2024 02:38 PM (LHPAg)

157 The Art of Manliness?

A Web site devoted to the paintings of Tim Walz?

Posted by: NPR-listening NPC who walks among you at October 27, 2024 02:38 PM (PiwSw)

158 Pretzel burger buns.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:38 PM (kpS4V)

159 LHPAg)

105 92 And ALWAYS

cut the burger in half before eating“

The best thing about those little burgers called sliders is that you can put the whole thing in your mouth and eat it in one bite.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 27, 2024 02:39 PM (cV2we)

160 You know who else was fond of Kaiser rolls?

Posted by: General Burkhalter at October 27, 2024 02:39 PM (nS6qG)

161 A Philly cheese steak turns into a California cheese steak just by adding mayonnaise.

-San Fransico stock yard wrangler

Posted by: I'm Gumby Damn It! at October 27, 2024 02:39 PM (fzujD)

162 And ladies, I love you all sexually, but

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:29 PM (GtZ7X)

Burt, I view you as one of my grey box big brothers, or maybe little brother depending on which side of 29 you are, so now I need a bleach cleanse.
Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (p4NUW)

Hah! Sorry 'bout that.

Funny thing is, in real life meat space, I don't tend to think of any of the women I admire (but am not in a position to date) in a truly sexual way. It's weird, I work with some good looking women, but it's just... it just doesn't come up that way (pun intended).

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:39 PM (GtZ7X)

163 The new toilet in my downstairs bathroom is an auto closer

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 02:39 PM (/7KEl)

164 I'm surprised "The Art of Manliness" hasn't been canceled yet.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at October 27, 2024 02:40 PM (Q4IgG)

165 1) RCP betting sites avg now up to Trump +23.6-- This is a NEW high for Team Orange (since Biden withdrew). The gamblers clearly think he's going to win.

2) Kornacki on NBC today: "Small but potentially significant movement toward Trump" in 4 recent national polls.

3) It's one thing to read about "crowds waiting outside MSG for Trump rally," and another thing to SEE these crowds. Yiminy Crickets.

Posted by: K.C. Wolf (mnw) at October 27, 2024 02:41 PM (NLIak)

166 Pretzel burger buns.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:38 PM (kpS4V)

Agreed. The ones I get are not salted, and they should be.

Otherwise.....

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:41 PM (GtZ7X)

167 Put some Worchestershire sauce in the melted butter for your grilled cheese.

When we bought my new car, the dealer told me the code for the door. "Oh, I can remember that!" I said.
"How?" said Mr S.
"It's T's birth year and month and the year S graduated from HS."
"Yeah, no. Write it down for me."

Posted by: sal, who watches way too much TCM at October 27, 2024 02:41 PM (f+FmA)

168 Bwahahahaha.

Adventures in leftist autophagy: media lefties are now turning on each other because they're, you know, to easy on Trump and too hard on Kamala.

You can tell Donald Trump is winning and Kamala Harris is losing when Washington Post columnists like Eugene Robinson are lashing out at the liberal media, like they have failed to cover Donald Trump viciously enough, that they somehow haven't played up former Trump aides calling him a fascist enough.

https://tinyurl.com/2y4cdrbv

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 02:42 PM (xCA6C)

169 160 You know who else was fond of Kaiser rolls?
Posted by: General Burkhalter at October 27, 2024 02:39 PM (nS6qG)
-Kaiser Wilhem II ?

Posted by: I'm Gumby Damn It! at October 27, 2024 02:42 PM (fzujD)

170 Nothing betwixt the patty and bottom bun!!!!

Posted by: Weasel at October 27, 2024 02:42 PM (WQkJR)

171 The damn thing locked itself (with the key in the ignition) after a while, and even with the spare key (which I had to hunt down), it wouldn't unlock. Had to get a locksmith to come out and get it open.

On the bright side, it was nice and warm when we finally got in.
Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:35 PM (GtZ7X)

I miss my old car. Even for it's day, it was low tech - it didn't even have power windows or locks. No "key FOB", or anything like that.

FOB cost a fortune to replace, and with power windows I worry about possibly not being able to climb out a window, in case of emergency.

It's also just nasty if you want to sit inside the car while the driver (with the key) has to go do something. The AC isn't on, and you can't open the windows.

That was even before all the electronic gadgets you see today - which I assume cost an absolute fortune to fix when it breaks.

Posted by: MrExcitement at October 27, 2024 02:43 PM (hOOi9)

172 170 Nothing betwixt the patty and bottom bun!!!!
Posted by: Weasel at October 27, 2024 02:42 PM (WQkJR)

I tend to agree with this one.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:43 PM (y31cs)

173 Well I was going to go work out but J took my car. I really hate driving his.

For someone who made fun of my little matchbox car, he sure does steal it a lot.

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:43 PM (p4NUW)

174 My last stick, you had to do both clutch and brake.
Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:32 PM (GtZ7X)

That is just a silly idea.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:35 PM (y31cs)

You get used to it. My current vehicle, I sometimes find myself reaching for the clutch that is not there. Like an amputee who tries to pick their nose, but can't.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:44 PM (GtZ7X)

175 I hate that auto lock feature. Mrs fd insists that it be turned on in her car. Hate it. Everytime I go to open the door it's f'n locked.

Posted by: fd at October 27, 2024 02:44 PM (vFG9F)

176 147 Learn to share, Eromero.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Cat Slave at October 27, 2024 02:36 PM (kpS4V)
Mrs.E just wanted one chicken liver, yourpeen bread and butter, and chocolate pie. Picky.

Posted by: Eromero at October 27, 2024 02:44 PM (LHPAg)

177

McD.L.T.

https://youtu.be/vVcVXTeHTLI

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at October 27, 2024 02:44 PM (63Dwl)

178 Y'all are in for a surprise next time you shop. When Israel was dropping the first bomb on Iran Friday night, I went from store to store buying up ALL the toilet paper. From now on, if you wanna wipe, you gotta go through me.

Posted by: Thinking Ahead at October 27, 2024 02:45 PM (nS6qG)

179 I own a Jeep Grand Cherokee Limited
The car unlocks automatically b y me just carrying a FOB in my pocket.

Is that a FOB in yer pocket or are you just happy to see me
-Dalmer Chrysler

Posted by: I'm Gumby Damn It! at October 27, 2024 02:47 PM (fzujD)

180 That was even before all the electronic gadgets you see today - which I assume cost an absolute fortune to fix when it breaks.
Posted by: MrExcitement at October 27, 2024 02:43 PM (hOOi9)

Back when I had to drive a vehicle for work, all their cars were from Government Motors. One time I put it in park, to let someone out of the car, and when I tried to put it back into drive, it wouldn't.

Everything I tried wouldn't work, and when I called for assistance, they couldn't figure it out either. Had to have the damn thing towed, after having it blocking the front of the building, it was quite embarrassing.

Turned out to be a loose wire that controls the gear shift.

Stupid Government Motors.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:47 PM (GtZ7X)

181 139 My FWP. My 2003 pickup needs repair. It was sickly when I last used it but got the BAT and horses home. Now it will not even start. Sigh, my sister said I should buy a new one. Maybe I will consider getting a new to me used one. I'd sure like to stick with a model old enough to not have the DEF feature. And I have to find a mobile mechanic or get the pickup towed now. Le sigh.
Posted by: PaleRider
======
Good luck. Pickups, due to the price, are usually well worth restoring to former glory unless rusted out body or blown engine.

Posted by: whig at October 27, 2024 02:47 PM (ctrM5)

182 168

If only the DEMs had let more people know how much they hate Trump, it all coulda been different.

They just didn't have a big enough megaphone. Too few people knew.

Posted by: K.C. Wolf (mnw) at October 27, 2024 02:47 PM (NLIak)

183 F**k pickles.

Posted by: Pupster at October 27, 2024 02:48 PM (DuqHK)

184 161 A Philly cheese steak turns into a California cheese steak just by adding mayonnaise.

-San Fransico stock yard wrangler
Posted by: I'm Gumby Damn It! at October 27, 2024 02:39 PM (fzujD)

I think that’s called a California Tube Steak.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 27, 2024 02:49 PM (cV2we)

185 183 F**k pickles.
Posted by: Pupster at October 27, 2024 02:48 PM (DuqHK)

Exception: pickles on White Castles. I pick them off, but I like them having been there.

It is a texture thing rather than a taste thing.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at October 27, 2024 02:50 PM (y31cs)

186
I admit, I like bluetooth capability in my car because it's nice to hear audio over my car's speakers.

But, a 12v cigarette lighter + a $10 bluetooth adapter from Amazon = Bluetooth in any car

Posted by: Soothsayer at October 27, 2024 02:50 PM (xTbNp)

187 163 The new toilet in my downstairs bathroom is an auto closer
Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 02:39 PM (/7KEl)
Good idea. Don’t want that stuff crawling out of there.

Posted by: Eromero at October 27, 2024 02:50 PM (LHPAg)

188 Make no mistake. War is coming!
Michelle Oblowme was dressed in her militant camo uniform yesterday at her Harris speech..

-White Men are cowards Eric Holder 2013

Posted by: I'm Gumby Damn It! at October 27, 2024 02:51 PM (fzujD)

189 132 I worked at Whataburger and the 1970s, and yes you put the mustard or Mayo or ketchup on the top bun then you put lettuce then onions, then tomatoes and then pickles. The Patty with cheese goes next and then the bottom bun.
Posted by: Happy at October 27, 2024 02:34 PM (V8q1L)

I would make a case for putting something on the bottom bun, before the burger patty. The juice from the burger would get soaked up by the bottom bun, making it too moist and ready to fall apart after a couple of bites. It shouldn't be lettuce, but something else, like mayo, that serves as a moisture guard for the bun.

Posted by: Darrell Harris at October 27, 2024 02:51 PM (FLsS9)

190 183 F**k pickles.
Posted by: Pupster

BTDT. Mighty Fine.

Posted by: Peter Bootyjuice at October 27, 2024 02:51 PM (YdEcD)

191 The new toilet in my downstairs bathroom is an auto closer
Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 02:39 PM (/7KEl)
Good idea. Don’t want that stuff crawling out of there.

Fine. You come down here with us and see how YOU like it.

Posted by: Small gators at October 27, 2024 02:51 PM (xCA6C)

192 "The car unlocks automatically b y me just carrying a FOB in my pocket."

What if you don't want it to unlock every time you walk by?

I'm spoiled here and never lock my cars at the house. Some I leave the keys in all the time. Those are standard shift though so have inherent theft protection.

Posted by: fd at October 27, 2024 02:52 PM (vFG9F)

193 For me the pickle gotta be touching the tomato

Posted by: Rodney Smith at October 27, 2024 02:53 PM (D86sc)

194 All of the condiments go on both top and bottom. The pickles and onion can go either. The lettuce and tomato MUST go on top.

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 02:54 PM (+H2BX)

195 Went to a burger place where you could order one with the top and bottom buns replaced with grilled cheese sandwiches.

Heart attack on a plate....but friggin' worth it.

Posted by: Stu Podaso at October 27, 2024 02:54 PM (fQmeC)

196 When we bought my new car, the dealer told me the code for the door. "Oh, I can remember that!" I said.
"How?" said Mr S.
"It's T's birth year and month and the year S graduated from HS."
"Yeah, no. Write it down for me."
Posted by: sal, who watches way too much TCM at October 27, 2024 02:41 PM (f+FmA)

I used to remember number codes by who won the World Series that year. So if it's six or eight digits: 68493281, that's Tigers (boo!), Yankees, Yankees, Dodgers.

Of course, one problem is, Yankees won a lot of them, so you better remember which one is which. If you have an odd number, that's easy, whatever number it is, think of some player whose jersey was that number. Seven is easy, that's Mantle, Four is Gehrig, Three is Ruth (it helps to remember the Yankees players, all the single digits are HOFers).

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:54 PM (GtZ7X)

197 I've lived here for 36 years and have never locked my car doors. If I had a car that locked automatically, I would pull that fuse. My 4 vehicles are a combined 180 years old.

Posted by: Larry the Luddite at October 27, 2024 02:55 PM (nS6qG)

198 From bottom to top:
Tosted bun
Burger
Melted cheese (Not Kraft singles)
MmmmBacon
Shredded lettuce
Dill pickle chips
3 to 1 yellow mustard to ketchup ratio
Toasted top bun
Eat around perimeter, leaving last three bites of perfection.

Posted by: scampydog at October 27, 2024 02:55 PM (OgCTU)

199 Hamburger dill slices? Just love them.

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 02:56 PM (+H2BX)

200 Nothing betwixt the patty and bottom bun!!!!

Posted by: Weasel at October 27, 2024 02:42 PM (WQkJR)

How do you feel about a slice of cheese on the bottom bun? I have toyed with that, just to increase the total amount of cheese and spread it out.

I think a better plan would be to make a double patty burger and put cheese on the top and between the patties.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 02:56 PM (d9fT1)

201 I don't see bacon on that picture....

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, Texas - Ace of Spades Ladies' Brigade plucky comic relief at October 27, 2024 02:56 PM (SRRAx)

202 A whole thread on burgers and nobody mentioned BBQ sauce?
It's like I don't know you people.

Posted by: sal, who watches way too much TCM at October 27, 2024 02:56 PM (f+FmA)

203 >For me the pickle gotta be touching the tomato
---

red can't touch green
red can't touch green
red can't touch green

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 02:57 PM (/7KEl)

204 CBD, yep, double meat, double cheese.

Posted by: Ben Had at October 27, 2024 02:57 PM (t8vHj)

205 A whole thread on burgers and nobody mentioned BBQ sauce?
It's like I don't know you people.
Posted by: sal

BBQ sauce is too sweet for a burger, you might as well use ketchup.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at October 27, 2024 02:58 PM (Iq0J2)

206 Just saw the Trump ad during the bengals eagles game.

It's really good. Too bad he didn't start this blitz in august.

Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 02:58 PM (r6f6k)

207 >>> 146 130 Piper,
Love ya, lady, but you're seriously pushing it.
Posted by: nurse ratched at

I told you I was in a mood today! This is why we should live closer you know I am not a drinker, but this is one of those days I would grab a bottle of wine and show up at your door.
Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 02:35 PM (p4NUW)

*checks map*

A little over 7 hours from me. You could visit the calves! ;P

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at October 27, 2024 02:58 PM (FnneF)

208 I don't see bacon on that picture....
Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, Texas - Ace of Spades Ladies' Brigade plucky comic relief at October 27, 2024 02:56 PM (SRRAx)

Whoa.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at October 27, 2024 02:58 PM (aD39U)

209 "My 4 vehicles are a combined 180 years old.
Posted by: Larry the Luddite"

A man after my own heart. What do you want to bet those cars outlast any new Kia or Hyundai?

Posted by: fd at October 27, 2024 02:58 PM (vFG9F)

210 Nothing betwixt the patty and bottom bun!!!!

Posted by: Weasel at October 27, 2024 02:42 PM (WQkJR)

How do you feel about a slice of cheese on the bottom bun? I have toyed with that, just to increase the total amount of cheese and spread it out.

I think a better plan would be to make a double patty burger and put cheese on the top and between the patties.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 02:56 PM (d9fT1)

I have accidentally put the patty (with cheese) on the top bun, only to realize with horror my mistake, after it was too late.

It can be fixed, but it's almost at that point that one throws the whole thing away and goes out to eat.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 02:59 PM (GtZ7X)

211 {{{{Teresa}}}}
Lit a candle for you this morning.

Posted by: sal, who watches way too much TCM at October 27, 2024 02:59 PM (f+FmA)

212 We have a tricked out Explorer that has electrical gremlins. Something, sometimes will stay on, or a circuit stays open and drains the battery. It's not throwing any code that can be read. It's sitting in our driveway, immobile, while the battery tender trickle charges it.

I've finally convinced my wife to give it up.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at October 27, 2024 02:59 PM (Q4IgG)

213 Old joke:

A group of kids were taking a school field trip by bus to see a live showing of Big Bird and Elmo. There were two heavyset kids named Patricia and Patrick, a mentally handicapped kid named Ross, and a nerdy boy named Lester Meese who couldn't stop messing with his feet. On the way they began to sing this song:

♪ ♫ ♪

Two obese Patty's, special Ross, Lester Meese picking bunions on the Sesame Street bus...

Posted by: muldoon at October 27, 2024 02:59 PM (uCfKO)

214 Condiment #1 and pickle belong on the bottom. Only bacon, onion or mushroom belong on top.

Savages. The Stack is very important. Some of these burger joints slap that shit on like makeup, a combination only rarely seen on a streetwise harlot.

This is science, not some routine, weekly bootycall.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at October 27, 2024 03:00 PM (z+0uZ)

215 Now I want a burger.

Posted by: mindful webworker - hungry like to wolfe at October 27, 2024 03:00 PM (zg1wV)

216 So many references to BACON. The Horde knows stuff.

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at October 27, 2024 03:00 PM (FnneF)

217 If you have tomatoes, ketchup is superfluous.

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:00 PM (+H2BX)

218 A man after my own heart. What do you want to bet those cars outlast any new Kia or Hyundai?
Posted by: fd at October 27, 2024 02:58 PM (vFG9F)

Hyundai makes decent cars, even with their weird quirks.

Now, if you said outlive newer Frods and Chitveys, that I would agree with.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 03:00 PM (GtZ7X)

219 Bottom bun
Mustard (yellow or brown) or A-1 sauce if available
Burger patty
Cheese (Cheddar or Swiss preferred, never American)
Bacon
Onion
Pickles (Dill only)
Tomato
Lettuce
Mayo
Top Bun

Posted by: Stu Podaso at October 27, 2024 03:01 PM (fQmeC)

220 207 *checks map*

A little over 7 hours from me. You could visit the calves! ;P
Posted by: Helena Handbasket at October

Yes! Did you name them? Cheeseburger and Filet?

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 03:01 PM (p4NUW)

221 220 207 *checks map*

A little over 7 hours from me. You could visit the calves! ;P
Posted by: Helena Handbasket at October

Yes! Did you name them? Cheeseburger and Filet?
Posted by: Piper

Rib roast and BBQ?

Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 03:02 PM (r6f6k)

222 Whatever

*puts ketchup on a hotdog*

Posted by: Lizzy at October 27, 2024 03:03 PM (scDBq)

223 BBQ sauce is too sweet for a burger, you might as well use ketchup.
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at October 27, 2024 02:58 PM (Iq0J2)

Bun
Patty
BBQ sauce
chopped or grilled onion
Bun

I was led astray by the Hickory Burger at Jim's in my youth.

Posted by: sal, who watches way too much TCM at October 27, 2024 03:03 PM (f+FmA)

224 BBQ sauce is too sweet for a burger, you might as well use ketchup.
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at October 27, 2024 02:58 PM (Iq0J2)

There are many varieties of BBQ sauce, and I definitely prefer the non-sweet ones.

A BBQ burger would feature cheddar, onion rings, and of course bacon.

If you put bleu cheese on there, I will disown you.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 03:03 PM (GtZ7X)

225 Sautéd mushrooms onions and mootz
Top and bottom and bun of course

Posted by: kactus at October 27, 2024 03:04 PM (twS2i)

226 Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 02:56 PM (d9fT1)
-----
Nothing. Nothing betwixt the patty and bottom bun. To do otherwise is inviting communism.

Posted by: Weasel at October 27, 2024 03:04 PM (9p1tT)

227 Cars nowadays are disposable. In general, when the computers, engines, or transmissions fail after 100k they are not worth fixing. The average person is going to go lease something else.

Posted by: fd at October 27, 2024 03:05 PM (vFG9F)

228 *puts ketchup on a hotdog*

savage

Posted by: JackStraw at October 27, 2024 03:05 PM (LkLld)

229 Non-food related MSG!!

And so it begins!

https://is.gd/8Ecm5i
27 seconds; end of the singing of the National Anthem and intro.

[A good "And so it begins" and not a pessimistic one!]

Posted by: andycanuck (hovnC) at October 27, 2024 03:05 PM (hovnC)

230 Apropos of nothing, the wife and I dressed up as Princess Buttercup and the Dread Pirate Roberts for a party last night. Yes, I was Roberts. Good costumes, if I say so myself, and I do.

Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 03:06 PM (xCA6C)

231 Hyundai makes decent cars, even with their weird quirks.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 03:00 PM (GtZ7X)
-

Very happy with our 7 year old Hyundai hybrid. Cannot think of any weird quirks. Remains in great shape, mechanically as well as the interior and exterior materials.

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at October 27, 2024 03:06 PM (3Y5XB)

232 >>> 221 220 207 *checks map*

A little over 7 hours from me. You could visit the calves! ;P
Posted by: Helena Handbasket at October

Yes! Did you name them? Cheeseburger and Filet?
Posted by: Piper

Rib roast and BBQ?
Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 03:02 PM (r6f6k)

HA!

One is a girl so she's expected to make more calves eventually. I might end up getting a few more steers though, so multiple names are good.

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at October 27, 2024 03:06 PM (FnneF)

233 No fried egg!?
Commie bastards!

Posted by: Paul B at October 27, 2024 03:06 PM (XlYoV)

234 >>> 226 Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 02:56 PM (d9fT1)
-----
Nothing. Nothing betwixt the patty and bottom bun. To do otherwise is inviting communism.
Posted by: Weasel at October 27, 2024 03:04 PM (9p1tT)

If you do that The Terrorists Have Won!!!

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at October 27, 2024 03:07 PM (FnneF)

235 226 Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 02:56 PM (d9fT1)
-----
Nothing. Nothing betwixt the patty and bottom bun. To do otherwise is inviting communism.
Posted by: Weasel at October 27, 2024 03:04 PM (9p1tT
Structural failure, possible injury, litigation.

Posted by: Eromero at October 27, 2024 03:07 PM (LHPAg)

236 A 65 Impala is a car someone will keep for 50 years. A Hyundai Elantra? Nah.

Posted by: fd at October 27, 2024 03:07 PM (vFG9F)

237 Ketchup- yes
Mayo- yes
Mustard- no
Pickles-no
Bacon - yes
Cheese - yes
Grilled Onions - yes
Tomato- yes
Melted butter brushed on burger - yes
Bed of lettuce on bottom- yes
Toasted bun- yes

Posted by: redridinghood at October 27, 2024 03:08 PM (NpAcC)

238 >>> 230 Apropos of nothing, the wife and I dressed up as Princess Buttercup and the Dread Pirate Roberts for a party last night. Yes, I was Roberts. Good costumes, if I say so myself, and I do.
Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 03:06 PM (xCA6C)

Anybody want a peanut?

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at October 27, 2024 03:08 PM (FnneF)

239 We like our Elantra, but yeah, they will never be collector car.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, punching the iPad screen like a chimp at October 27, 2024 03:09 PM (Ad8y9)

240 I think a better plan would be to make a double patty burger and put cheese on the top and between the patties.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

That's what I was doing!
~C. Schumer

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at October 27, 2024 03:09 PM (Iq0J2)

241 Free the Condiments!

Posted by: Pete Bog at October 27, 2024 03:09 PM (b25k9)

242 196 — 7! Mickey Mantle’s number. So not only is it a great name, but it’s also an all around tribute. — George Costanza

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at October 27, 2024 03:09 PM (i5Vkf)

243 113 Didn’t McDonald’s offer a burger years ago delivered to you in two compartments… the hot side hot and the cold side cold? I forget the name… the Mc-something….

Posted by: LinusVanPelt at October 27, 2024 02:31 PM (ZtAny)
++++

McDLT.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 27, 2024 03:10 PM (klJTj)

244 >>> Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 02:56 PM (d9fT1)
-----
Nothing. Nothing betwixt the patty and bottom bun. To do otherwise is inviting communism.

Posted by: Weasel

>This is how a man of character makes a chili burger. Cheese, onion, mustard, and whatever. On the top.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at October 27, 2024 03:10 PM (z+0uZ)

245 I can grind a pork loin($1.99 /lb). A bun, some BBQ sauce and boom, a bbq pork sandwich. I do fry the port patty in bacon grease.

I think the hamburger dill slices would be good.

No cheese is necessary.

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:10 PM (+H2BX)

246 230 Apropos of nothing, the wife and I dressed up as Princess Buttercup and the Dread Pirate Roberts for a party last night. Yes, I was Roberts. Good costumes, if I say so myself, and I do.
Posted by: Archimedes at October 27, 2024 03:06 PM (xCA6C)

I made youngest d's best friend the riding habit one year.
That may have been the year youngest d was Carmen Sandiego, so I made a trench coat and the hat.
I'm a swell person.

Posted by: sal, who watches way too much TCM at October 27, 2024 03:10 PM (f+FmA)

247 My fad used to go to the VFW to pick up lunch and bring it to my house. Every Tuesday. He always got the greater tenderloin that was three times the size of the bun and got a cheeseburger for me. He knew that I love dill pickles so he made sure there was mustard and pickles on my burger. Unfortunately, the VFW here put bread and butter pickles on their sandwich. I can't stand bread and butter pickles. Loathe them. Dad didn't realize that was the kind of pickles they used so I had to pick the nasty things off. Luckily, Pappymayhem loved that kind of pickle and ate them. I miss our Tuesday lunches.

This is not an attack on anyone who likes bread and butter pickles. It is just a statement about my own preference.

Posted by: Madame Mayhem (uppity wench) at October 27, 2024 03:10 PM (4XwPj)

248 Fetterman on truck nuts.

Eric Abbenante
@EricAbbenante
John Fetterman explains what truck nuts are to a New York Times reporter:
John Fetterman: "I live directly across the street from a Steel Mill. I asked the union president
'Hey where are we on Trump?'
'Half or 2/3rds are voting for him'
That sucks.
Immediately there was a guy getting off, and he had a truck. He had truck nuts on it. Do you know what truck nuts are?"
Lulu Garcia-Navarro: "Do I look like I know what truck nuts are?"
Fetterman: "It's balls hung on the hitch of a truck. He honked and he was like 'Go Trump!' as he went by.
We're in trouble. It's undeniable."
Democrats: 'Truck nuts are barbaric. We'd rather chop off the body parts of young boys instead.'

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I've Been Through the Desert On a Horse With No Shame at October 27, 2024 03:10 PM (L/fGl)

249 All this meat talk reminded me of Sentient Meat:

https://is.gd/g1BpiU (text)
https://is.gd/kOm5zZ (video)

Posted by: Ciampino - See canned meat at October 27, 2024 03:11 PM (i0xsb)

250
Two obese Patty's, special Ross, Lester Meese picking bunions on the Sesame Street bus...

Come for the smart military blog, stay for the poetry.

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in Solidarity with the Struggle at October 27, 2024 03:11 PM (xKEhr)

251 Why are you saying bottoms like it's a bad thing?

Posted by: Barry Soetoro at October 27, 2024 03:11 PM (a3Q+t)

252 Cars nowadays are disposable. In general, when the computers, engines, or transmissions fail after 100k they are not worth fixing. The average person is going to go lease something else.
Posted by: fd

Looks out at Betterhalf's 2013 Santa Fe with 190,000 miles on it and smiles.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at October 27, 2024 03:11 PM (Iq0J2)

253 Ketchup has no place on a burger. It's place is for dipping fries. Unless, of course, you prefer Ranch as a dip. Or a Frosty.

Curry ketchup is also appropriate.

Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 03:11 PM (1wZKM)

254 A man of character? Weasel?

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:11 PM (+H2BX)

255 Hyundai makes decent cars, even with their weird quirks.

Posted by: BurtTC

I had a 2016 Hyundai Sonata...had. Some kids found out how to not only unlock the doors, but also start the engine with a bump key, and took it for a joy ride. After they were done, they dumped it and set it on fire, burning it to the ground. Good car...easy to steal.

Posted by: Stu Podaso at October 27, 2024 03:11 PM (fQmeC)

256 "Do we need a purge?"

Yes.

Posted by: The Eradicator at October 27, 2024 03:12 PM (zPjZn)

257 My wife claims that I am strange.

I always flip over a burger or sandwich so that the most preferred flavor is on the bottom ... and therefore the primary flavor on my taste buds.

Bacon-topped cheese burger - eat it upside down so you get bacon flavor within a medley of the other flavors.

A sandwich topped with very tasty expensive cheese - eat that sammich upside down.

This is all very simple "Moron science"!

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at October 27, 2024 03:12 PM (HlyYF)

258 Toyota. 300k or bust.

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:12 PM (+H2BX)

259 Sentient Meat:

Used to date her.

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in Solidarity with the Struggle at October 27, 2024 03:12 PM (xKEhr)

260 The savages who populate this place slather mayo on everything.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at October 27, 2024 03:13 PM (RIvkX)

261 mayo is great with fries

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 03:14 PM (/7KEl)

262 >>>>Maybe I will consider getting a new to me used one. I'd sure like to stick with a model old enough to not have the DEF feature. And I have to find a mobile mechanic or get the pickup towed now. Le sigh.
Posted by: PaleRider
*********
Just my $0.02, Do Not get rid of that truck. I’m sure it is difficult, but you can figure it out. Get a garage to that can give you jump. Take it somewhere they can test your electric/battery system. Not a big deal. I’m having the same problem with my 2017 diesel.

Posted by: Rufus T. Firefly at October 27, 2024 03:14 PM (oSCuC)

263 Only Dukes.

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:14 PM (+H2BX)

264 253 Ketchup has no place on a burger. It's place is for dipping fries. Unless, of course, you prefer Ranch as a dip. Or a Frosty.

Curry ketchup is also appropriate.
Posted by: nurse ratched at

A salty fry in a frosty is so good. I am not a ketchup fan. Or mayo, unless homemade and who wants to go through all that!

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 03:14 PM (p4NUW)

265 Happy at October 27, WhatABurger knows best.

Posted by: Braenyard at October 27, 2024 03:15 PM (Dng1D)

266 14 I do not put lettuce on my burgers. Not because I do not like lettuce, but because it tends to make the experience messier as it slides around. Everything else should be above the burger and cheese.
Posted by: Pug Mahon, Balding American at October 27, 2024 02:05 PM (Ad8y9)

This is probably why McDonald's uses shredded lettuce on the Big Mac. (Not that it prevents the Big Mac from being the messiest burger commercially available.)

Posted by: The Eradicator at October 27, 2024 03:15 PM (zPjZn)

267 If there's enough blood in your poop Dracula will eat it.

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in Solidarity with the Struggle at October 27, 2024 03:15 PM (xKEhr)

268 258 Toyota. 300k or bust.

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:12 PM

That was our plan. Daughter hit a huge 8-point buck. Repair bill was just under the figure for totaling the car.

I sure hope it can still reach the 300k mark.

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at October 27, 2024 03:16 PM (HlyYF)

269 This is not an attack on anyone who likes bread and butter pickles. It is just a statement about my own preference.
Posted by: Madame Mayhem (uppity wench) at October 27, 2024 03:10 PM (4XwPj)
===

So, you're saying I hate America. Got it.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at October 27, 2024 03:16 PM (RIvkX)

270 We got 400,000 miles out of our Camry. The day it turned over, I was contemplating how soon we should start working on replacing it. On the way home, a left-turning person totaled the car for us so we didn't have to contemplate that issue for very long.

Posted by: Emmie at October 27, 2024 03:16 PM (5kCS7)

271 I wonder what my wife will want to replace her Explorer? It's a huge vehicle and only once has the 3rd row seen passengers. Most of the time it's just the two of us.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at October 27, 2024 03:16 PM (Q4IgG)

272 249
Slightly different video for Sentient Meat
https://youtu.be/R6ZALERKBPA

Posted by: Ciampino - It's alive I tell you at October 27, 2024 03:17 PM (i0xsb)

273 If there's enough blood in your poop Dracula will eat it.
Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in Solidarity with the Struggle at October 27, 2024 03:15 PM (xKEhr)

On that note... Gotta get my thirty minutes walk done. Laters!

Posted by: Madame Mayhem (uppity wench) at October 27, 2024 03:17 PM (4XwPj)

274 Let's turn that frown upside down, Mr Vulcan!

Posted by: Neelix at October 27, 2024 03:17 PM (hovnC)

275 >> mayo is great with fries

Used to be pub around here that made killer bacon and blue cheese burgers with hand cut fries.

They had a killer chipotle mayo on the burger and always gave extra for dipping the fries. I miss that place.

Posted by: JackStraw at October 27, 2024 03:18 PM (LkLld)

276 "Looks out at Betterhalf's 2013 Santa Fe with 190,000 miles on it and smiles.
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron"

That's the way to do it. Keep it until it fails. Drive the wheels off, some might say. If the engine goes though, will you replace it? Rebuilding is probably not an financially smart option. A used engine might be, but a lot of folks are going to scrap it by 200k.

Posted by: fd at October 27, 2024 03:18 PM (vFG9F)

277 273
On that note... Gotta get my thirty minutes walk done. Laters!
Posted by: Madame Mayhem (uppity

Ha! also, go you!

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 03:18 PM (p4NUW)

278 and onion rings

Posted by: mindful webworker - you wouldn't like me when I'm hangry at October 27, 2024 03:18 PM (zg1wV)

279 260 The savages who populate this place slather mayo on everything.
Posted by: San Franpsycho at October 27, 2024 03:13 PM (RIvkX)

White people. Sheesh.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 27, 2024 03:18 PM (S6gqv)

280 >>>A man of character? Weasel?

Posted by: no one of any consequence

>Shh. Humor the old todger. He still has vision in his shooting eye.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at October 27, 2024 03:19 PM (z+0uZ)

281 Back in the day, Detroit wanted to sell you a new car every 3 years. Toyota, Datsun (Nissan) and Honda ate their lunch with cars that would last 100k+.

It was comical how long the idiots took to learn this.

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:19 PM (+H2BX)

282 Take a Z, then a Q throw in a couple other consonants, another Z and maybe a X, and add a vowel and the mandatory Y. Now mix them together, call it a new wonder drug to fix some obscure thing we've never heard of, and make the most annoying ad you can think of.
This is more than a FWP. It is a clear sign of the decline of civilization.

Posted by: Diogenes at October 27, 2024 03:20 PM (W/lyH)

283 Sorry that I missed BurtTC making passionate love to all the 'Ettes. Would have been a nice change of pace from corporations attempting to screw me.

I may have a FWP because I pulled put my HO printer to use. It's prompting me to download software. I have been warned the HP developed a new policy of freezing the printer if I don't use certified cartridges.

On the one hand, my printer is old and maybe I won't really need to update it.

On the other hand...

Posted by: NaughtyPine at October 27, 2024 03:20 PM (UtssP)

284
I suppose the real question is -

Which of you godless barbarian mix stuff into your hamburger meat so that you're cooking meatloaf,

instead of a pure ground beef patty seasoned on the outside with salt, pepper, and whatever else you'd like as God intended in the Bible?

Posted by: naturalfake at October 27, 2024 03:20 PM (eDfFs)

285 Car manufacturers still want to turn cars, but it's a longer cycle now. They want to get you into 7-8 year lease payments.

Posted by: fd at October 27, 2024 03:21 PM (vFG9F)

286 A man of character? Weasel?
Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:11 PM

He's an Honorary Texan, so I would say so.

One must, of course, humor his watch size peccadillo.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at October 27, 2024 03:22 PM (a3Q+t)

287 I worked with a guy whose father the worked for GM. The warranty was designed to run out the day before the MTBF (Mean time before failure)

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:22 PM (+H2BX)

288 No, no. Never!

Zoltan? Maybe.

Posted by: Dracula at October 27, 2024 03:23 PM (hCzfy)

289 My '04 F150 is 20 years old (math!) but only has 103K miles on it

I figure it owes me another 100k
it's my last vehicle

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 03:23 PM (/7KEl)

290 I’m having hot links, catfish, chicken livers, peppers, and chocolate pie.
**********
You enjoy yourself today Mr. E, for tomorrow and thereafter you will be the chief chef for Mrs E.

Posted by: Grateful, the range bag lady at October 27, 2024 03:23 PM (IQ6Gq)

291 Meatloaf? Day old bread, toasted and cut into chunks. Is there any other way?

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:24 PM (+H2BX)

292 How can the Jets spend so much money and still suck?

Posted by: JackStraw at October 27, 2024 03:24 PM (LkLld)

293 I think it's funny that burgers are now topped with things we used to call "sides"

Like-- french fries, onion rings, and the like.

Here's an idea: Put jalapeno poppers on a burger! Of course it has already been done *somewhere* right?

Posted by: JQ at October 27, 2024 03:24 PM (njWTi)

294 From my deep well of experience of having worked as a graveyard-shift fry cook during college, I can state authoritatively that the proper order, from bottom to top, is: bottom bun, condiment, lettuce, onion slice, burger, cheese, bacon, pickles, tomato, condiment, top bun. The onion slice compresses the lettuce into the bottom condiment, thereby minimizing slippage. The tomato overlaps the pickles and is held in place by the cheese, ensuring that the pickles don't drop out, and the top condiment provides an insulating layer so that the tomato does not make the top bun soggy.

I am the science.

Posted by: Pennsyltucky at October 27, 2024 03:24 PM (QdGJh)

295 Hyundai makes decent cars, even with their weird quirks.

Posted by: BurtTC

I had a 2016 Hyundai Sonata...had. Some kids found out how to not only unlock the doors, but also start the engine with a bump key, and took it for a joy ride. After they were done, they dumped it and set it on fire, burning it to the ground. Good car...easy to steal.
Posted by: Stu Podaso at October 27, 2024 03:11 PM (fQmeC)

That would definitely qualify as a quirk!

The one I had, in order to replace the headlight bulb, you had to take out the battery, and it had this little clip on it, that you had to think backwards to get on and off.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 03:25 PM (GtZ7X)

296 Be like Harry Callahan: carry a yuuge madel 29 antd load it with light specials formore control than a 357 with wadcutters.

Posted by: 80's music fan at October 27, 2024 03:26 PM (QSrLX)

297 we need a Purge.
Also bacon
and an extra beef patty

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo, food, water at October 27, 2024 03:26 PM (xcxpd)

298 "Car manufacturers still want to turn cars, but it's a longer cycle now. They want to get you into 7-8 year lease payments"

all while Toyota will sell you a car are good for 15 years.

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:27 PM (+H2BX)

299 The tomato must touch the mayonnaise in any sandwich!

Posted by: Janet Roesler at October 27, 2024 03:27 PM (V62VE)

300 I can seethe utility of placing the lettuce and tomato on bottom, as to keep them from slipping out, but I usually put them up top. And hold the pickles.

Posted by: javems at October 27, 2024 03:27 PM (8I4hW)

301
2013 Honda Odyssey: 325,000 miles and still doing great.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at October 27, 2024 03:27 PM (EsZUh)

302 296 Be like Harry Callahan: carry a yuuge madel 29 antd load it with light specials formore control than a 357 with wadcutters.
Posted by: 80's music fan at October 27, 2024 03:26 PM (QSrLX)

Nonsense.
240 gr is the start.
If you're going to carry a .44, go full magnum. Buffalo Bore hardcase. Fucking crack an engine block with your EDC

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo, food, water at October 27, 2024 03:27 PM (xcxpd)

303 From bottom to top:
Tosted bun
Burger
Melted cheese (Not Kraft singles)
MmmmBacon
Shredded lettuce
Dill pickle chips
3 to 1 yellow mustard to ketchup ratio
Toasted top bun
Eat around perimeter, leaving last three bites of perfection.
Posted by: scampydog

You forgot pickle relish, A1 sauce and horseradish sauce. I like a burger with everything on it. I'll sacrifice the bacon for all the other stuff.

Posted by: Tuna at October 27, 2024 03:28 PM (oaGWv)

304 Seems like certain condiments on the bottom bun might keep juices from soaking in and making the bun soggy. Like mayo might make the bun more moisture-resistant. Maybe a thin layer of butter or cream cheese.

Posted by: Emmie at October 27, 2024 03:28 PM (5kCS7)

305 AOC and Walz are playing Madden on Twitch the same time Trump is at MSG.

Whoever is running the Harris campaign is one of us in secret.

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 03:28 PM (p4NUW)

306 301
2013 Honda Odyssey: 325,000 miles and still doing great.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at October 27, 2024 03:27 PM (EsZUh)

I hear it Fucks Hard

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo, food, water at October 27, 2024 03:28 PM (xcxpd)

307 Bunch of bullies here. I’ll eat my burgers as I see fit!

With a knife and fork!

Posted by: Pete Bog at October 27, 2024 03:28 PM (b25k9)

308 Sorry folks, too much Wild Turkey 101.

I'll try to behave

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo, food, water at October 27, 2024 03:28 PM (xcxpd)

309 Cheese goes under the meat to protect the bottom bun from falling apart from the 'juices'.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at October 27, 2024 03:28 PM (/lPRQ)

310 >>I think it's funny that burgers are now topped with things we used to call "sides"

Like-- french fries, onion rings, and the like.

Can blame Instagram for that?

Posted by: Lizzy at October 27, 2024 03:28 PM (scDBq)

311 133 125
You like big buns?
Posted by: JackStraw

And he cannot lie
Posted by: Piper
------------

There is an ideal ratio of bun to meat. McDonald's has too much bun for the burger and the meat doesn't come near the edge of the bun. Jack in the box is OK and they've increased the amount of meat, it hangs out the bun. WhatABurger is the ideal ratio. Better veggies too.

Posted by: Braenyard at October 27, 2024 03:29 PM (Dng1D)

312 Be like Harry Callahan: carry a yuuge madel 29 antd load it with light specials formore control than a 357 with wadcutters.
Posted by: 80's music fan at October 27, 2024 03:26 PM

In at least two of the DH movies, he carried a Model 57, because the DH-induced demand for Model 29s exceeded supply.

The Model 57 is chambered in the best handgun cartridge ever, according to several sources.

Posted by: Wesley Crusher at October 27, 2024 03:29 PM (a3Q+t)

313 304 Maybe a thin layer of butter or cream cheese.
Posted by: Emmie

Europeans love butter on their sandwiches. It makes me gag, it’s a texture thing I guess.

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 03:29 PM (p4NUW)

314 Sorry that I missed BurtTC making passionate love to all the 'Ettes. Would have been a nice change of pace from corporations attempting to screw me.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at October 27, 2024 03:20 PM (UtssP)

Just an expression of affection, I wasn't expecting anyone to take me up on it.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 03:29 PM (GtZ7X)

315 I do prefer grilled onions or fresh. Top or bottom, I don't care.

Posted by: no one of any consequence at October 27, 2024 03:30 PM (+H2BX)

316 Backyard Burger made an awesome burger topped with BBQ sauce and cole slaw. Yum!

Posted by: Emmie at October 27, 2024 03:30 PM (5kCS7)

317 instead of a pure ground beef patty seasoned on the outside with salt, pepper, and whatever else you'd like as God intended in the Bible?

Posted by: naturalfake at October 27, 2024 03:20 PM (eDfFs)

Pepper?

Heathen!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 03:30 PM (d9fT1)

318 294 From my deep well of experience of having worked as a graveyard-shift fry cook during college, I can state authoritatively that the proper order, from bottom to top, is: bottom bun, condiment, lettuce, onion slice, burger, cheese, bacon, pickles, tomato, condiment, top bun. The onion slice compresses the lettuce into the bottom condiment, thereby minimizing slippage. The tomato overlaps the pickles and is held in place by the cheese, ensuring that the pickles don't drop out, and the top condiment provides an insulating layer so that the tomato does not make the top bun soggy.

I am the science.
Posted by: Pennsyltucky at October 27, 2024 03:24 PM (QdGJh)

I am prepared to accept this wisdom.

Lettuce on the bottom certainly can contain juicies. Normally I have to flip a burger halfway through eating it.

Also, if you're on Hwy 2. please try Bubba's Roadhouse in Sultan. Fucking burger is the size of my meaty face.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo, food, water at October 27, 2024 03:32 PM (xcxpd)

319 Pepper?

Heathen!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 03:30 PM

I kind of liked her.

Posted by: Tony Stark at October 27, 2024 03:32 PM (a3Q+t)

320 Sorry that I missed BurtTC making passionate love to all the 'Ettes. Would have been a nice change of pace from corporations attempting to screw me.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at October 27, 2024 03:20 PM (UtssP)

Just an expression of affection, I wasn't expecting anyone to take me up on it.
Posted by: BurtTC at October 27, 2024 03:29 PM

I gathered that. Your comment and Piper's respnse made me laugh pretty hard!

Posted by: NaughtyPine at October 27, 2024 03:33 PM (UtssP)

321 305 AOC and Walz are playing Madden on Twitch the same time Trump is at MSG.

Whoever is running the Harris campaign is one of us in secret.
Posted by: Piper
--------------

Harris and Beyonce bombed in Houston. They expected a Beyonce concert but they received commentary. Then she exited. Unhappy crowd.

Posted by: Braenyard at October 27, 2024 03:33 PM (Dng1D)

322 Mayonnaise should never be on a hamburger

There I said it and not taking it back

Posted by: Yo! Ultra MAGA at October 27, 2024 03:33 PM (xZ7Ly)

323 >>AOC and Walz are playing Madden on Twitch the same time Trump is at MSG.

Wtf?
"Hello, fellow young people gamers!"

This morning saw a clip on X of the Penn State champion Wrestling team on stage with Trump one of his rallies.
Looks like a lot of Gen Z has had enough of the "cool" Democrats like AOC.

Posted by: Lizzy at October 27, 2024 03:33 PM (scDBq)

324 319 Pepper?

Heathen!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 27, 2024 03:30 PM

I kind of liked her.
Posted by: Tony Stark at October 27, 2024 03:32 PM (a3Q+t)

#DoBetter

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo, food, water at October 27, 2024 03:33 PM (xcxpd)

325 >>> 305 AOC and Walz are playing Madden on Twitch the same time Trump is at MSG.

Whoever is running the Harris campaign is one of us in secret.
Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 03:28 PM (p4NUW)

I bet it's not even really those two idiots playing, but a couple ringers.

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at October 27, 2024 03:33 PM (FnneF)

326 Mayonnaise should never be on a hamburger

There I said it and not taking it back
Posted by: Yo! Ultra MAGA

Miracle Whip only.

Posted by: Tuna at October 27, 2024 03:34 PM (oaGWv)

327 Harris and Beyonce bombed in Houston. They expected a Beyonce concert but they received commentary. Then she exited. Unhappy crowd.

Kamala is now being heckled at every campaign stop.

Posted by: The ARC of History! at October 27, 2024 03:34 PM (uxCna)

328 That was our plan. Daughter hit a huge 8-point buck. .
Posted by: Pillage Idiot at October 27, 2024 03:16 PM (HlyYF)

Euro mount or full shoulder? Your neck of the woods probably a whitetail?

Posted by: Pete Bog at October 27, 2024 03:34 PM (b25k9)

329 >>> 305 AOC and Walz are playing Madden on Twitch the same time Trump is at MSG.

Whoever is running the Harris campaign is one of us in secret.
Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 03:28 PM (p4NUW)

I bet it's not even really those two idiots playing, but a couple ringers.
Posted by: Helena Handbasket

No!
It's too early for the bell ringers to start annoying us!

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at October 27, 2024 03:34 PM (Iq0J2)

330 322 Mayonnaise should never be on a hamburger

There I said it and not taking it back
Posted by: Yo! Ultra MAGA at October 27, 2024 03:33 PM (xZ7Ly)

Mayo and ketchup together on a burger do dirty, sexy things.

I approve.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo, food, water at October 27, 2024 03:34 PM (xcxpd)

331 One must master the art of the deluxe cheeseburger before one can move on to other endeavors.

Condiment, pickles, lettuce, tomato, onions and cheeseburger. Secret sauce on top.

We are not barbarians. Make your deluxe moves from there, Maestro.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at October 27, 2024 03:35 PM (z+0uZ)

332 Proper paper wrapper protects from juices. Only mustard between the bottom bun and the meat.

Posted by: Braenyard at October 27, 2024 03:36 PM (Dng1D)

333 Test

Posted by: grammie's iPad at October 27, 2024 03:37 PM (SfhV1)

334 325
I bet it's not even really those two idiots playing, but a couple ringers.
Posted by: Helena Handbasket at

And me being stupid, I just realized Scott Pressler is gay. I think what confused me was his tucking his jeans in cowboy boots. Gay men should have better fashion sense! You only do this when you are actually working on a muddy farm, not to walk around town.

Posted by: Piper at October 27, 2024 03:37 PM (p4NUW)

335 330 Mayo and ketchup together on a burger do dirty, sexy things.

it's called "fry sauce"

Posted by: anachronda has lived in utah at October 27, 2024 03:37 PM (edU/H)

336 282 Take a Z, then a Q throw in a couple other consonants, another Z and maybe a X, and add a vowel and the mandatory Y. Now mix them together, call it a new wonder drug to fix some obscure thing we've never heard of, and make the most annoying ad you can think of.
This is more than a FWP. It is a clear sign of the decline of civilization.
Posted by: Diogenes at October 27, 2024 03:20 PM (W/lyH
Naming new drugs. That’s where the money is.
Try Protrix with molecular action. Gets you moving without the irritation and burning. Pet-safe and does not require refrigeration. Do not use in the eyes. Never the eyes.

Posted by: Eromero at October 27, 2024 03:37 PM (LHPAg)

337 I'm in the market for a new fridge, so if anyone has made a recent purchase and has a recommendation, I'm listening

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 03:38 PM (/7KEl)

338 Was napping time, Mexico Grand Prix starting soon

Posted by: Skip at October 27, 2024 03:38 PM (fwDg9)

339 The key to a proper cheeseburger is to microplane the cheese.

Posted by: JackStraw at October 27, 2024 03:38 PM (LkLld)

340 Also if at restaurant that puts condiments on the side, immediately flip burger over so bottom bun doest get soggy, quickly building burger out and returning to original orientation.

Posted by: scampydog at October 27, 2024 03:39 PM (OgCTU)

341 Woof.

The eagles have just turned the game into a rout.

I hate the eagles.

Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 03:39 PM (Fd5YO)

342 Toppings are for ice cream, not burgers. That's a discussion for another thread.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at October 27, 2024 03:40 PM (z+0uZ)

343 No one has mentioned a grilled pineapple ring and a fried egg on their burger.

For shame.

Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 03:41 PM (Fd5YO)

344 Demonrats' 1st world problem:

Went to a Beyouncay concert, but got to hear Willie Nelson (and some incoherent, cackling idiot) instead

Posted by: JQ at October 27, 2024 03:41 PM (njWTi)

345 I always put water-based condiments on the bun. That helps the bun taste better.

Posted by: Sasquatch, the Original Trans-Wookie at October 27, 2024 03:42 PM (5vE86)

346 Also, if you're on Hwy 2. please try Bubba's Roadhouse in Sultan. Fucking burger is the size of my meaty face.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo, food, water at October 27, 2024 03:32 PM (xcxpd)

Oooo!
I had a real Huck Finn childhood in Sultan! Great little town to be a kid.

Posted by: Diogenes at October 27, 2024 03:42 PM (W/lyH)

347 I started using Pepperidge Farm mini buns several years ago. Really like 'em. The big buns were too filling.

Posted by: olddog in mo at October 27, 2024 03:43 PM (hoCmQ)

348 French fries have no business in a burger or burrito. Side, ok, inside, no.

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in Solidarity with the Struggle at October 27, 2024 03:44 PM (xKEhr)

349 Pineapple has no rights being on a hamburger or pizza

Posted by: Skip at October 27, 2024 03:44 PM (fwDg9)

350 My folks got new car last spring.
Driving it home they hit a wild turkey... Took it back to dealer.
Dealer put it on flatbed to go to a bodyshop. Once bodyshop ws done with it, back on the flatbed to dealer.
Before it got to dealer they hit... Another wild turkey.

Wild turkey season should be a good one in southern Michigan.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at October 27, 2024 03:44 PM (/lPRQ)

351 Oh my pickups starter is working. If it was a dead battery, or starter just does not work I'd not be so blue about it. It was sickly, like there was a problem with the fuel, fuel pump, or computer that feeds the injectors when I was driving it, its an automatic but you can override and put in 1, 2, or 3. I had to use the override to get up Vail pass on the way home.

It refused to start a couple years ago with good battery and that was the computer, but its possible this is just a fuel pump which would be not be bad to repair other than not being able to drive it to a repair shop. The computer possibility would suck because that would be the second failure of the same thing in two years.

Posted by: PaleRider at October 27, 2024 03:44 PM (CKOCg)

352 That burger as shown is a travesty of epic proportions. First of all, it only has one patty, not enough cheese and ketchup and mayo? Good God. Every right minded man knows its mustard only.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at October 27, 2024 03:45 PM (Aoykm)

353 No one has mentioned a grilled pineapple ring and a fried egg on their burger.

For shame.
Posted by: nurse ratched
------------------

Love either, but never had them together.

Posted by: olddog in mo at October 27, 2024 03:45 PM (hoCmQ)

354 Detroit taking the Titans to the loo

Posted by: Boulder Terlit Hobo at October 27, 2024 03:46 PM (Jb/LK)

355 He's an Honorary Texan, so I would say so.

One must, of course, humor his watch size peccadillo.
Posted by: Duncanthrax at October 27, 2024 03:22 PM (a3Q+t)

My peccadillo is much larger than a watch.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) takes pride at October 27, 2024 03:46 PM (aD39U)

356
Got Ruth, Sonny, Finn and Diana bathed this afternoon. 10 dogs in 2 days. I hurt all over.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at October 27, 2024 03:46 PM (EsZUh)

357 Oklahoma onion burger. Fried onions, burger mashed into onions, flipped, mashed again. Crispy on the edges served with plain mustard (anything else gets you shot) on cheap white bread (depression heritage).

Posted by: bill in arkansas, not gonna comply with nuttin, waiting for the 0300 knock on the door at October 27, 2024 03:46 PM (gm9Sb)

358 Didn't KFC offer a sandwich with fried chicken as top and bottom buns with fried chicken in-between ?

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in Solidarity with the Struggle at October 27, 2024 03:47 PM (xKEhr)

359 Started making Hawaiian burgers on 4th of July cookouts. Burger, grilled pineapple, sweet bbq sauce.

Posted by: olddog in mo at October 27, 2024 03:47 PM (hoCmQ)

360 Voted today in blue NJ, the second day of early voting here, and the line was around the building.

Things are really looking good for us!

Posted by: IrishEi at October 27, 2024 03:47 PM (3ImbR)

361 343 No one has mentioned a grilled pineapple ring and a fried egg on their burger.

For shame.

Posted by: nurse ratched at October 27, 2024 03:41 PM (Fd5YO)
----
Fried egg is great. Please keep fruit away from my main course. Serve it later with ice cream or something else sweet.

Posted by: Ciampino - It's those Hawaiians trying to sell it at October 27, 2024 03:47 PM (i0xsb)

362 >>>I started using Pepperidge Farm mini buns several years ago. Really like 'em. The big buns were too filling.

Posted by: olddog in mo

>I'm with you on the mini "breads." Seems like nowadays all buns are as big as a fucking loaf. I could make four sandwiches with that bun! I like bread but Jeez!

Posted by: Dr. Bone at October 27, 2024 03:48 PM (z+0uZ)

363 Posted by: PaleRider at October 27, 2024 03:44 PM (CKOCg)

Cut a hole in your bed and change the fuel pump that way. Better than crawling under, unstrapping the tank and filling your head with road dust.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at October 27, 2024 03:48 PM (Aoykm)

364 Mayonnaise should never be on a hamburger

There I said it and not taking it back
Posted by: Yo! Ultra MAGA
---

A bunch of sliced green olives with just enough mayo to stick them together works well on the bottom bun.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at October 27, 2024 03:48 PM (/lPRQ)

365 We grew Brandywine tomatoes one year... oh, heaven on burgers! The fruits were yuge, like couple pounds each, and slices were bigger than the buns.

Half-inch thick 'mater slices, quarter-inch thick onion slices, all the other usual trimmings... everybody build their own. Mmmm.

Posted by: JQ at October 27, 2024 03:49 PM (njWTi)

366 363 Posted by: PaleRider at October 27, 2024 03:44 PM (CKOCg)

Cut a hole in your bed and change the fuel pump that way. Better than crawling under, unstrapping the tank and filling your head with road dust.
Posted by: Jak Sucio at October 27, 2024 03:48 PM (Aoykm
I pulled the bed off old mudtruck 88 Tacoma to get at the tank/filter/lines.

Posted by: Eromero at October 27, 2024 03:50 PM (LHPAg)

367 356
Got Ruth, Sonny, Finn and Diana bathed this afternoon. 10 dogs in 2 days. I hurt all over.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at October 27, 2024 03:46 PM (EsZUh)
----
If those were cats you'd hurt all over AND need a transfusion.

Posted by: Ciampino - Do they still smell after a bath? at October 27, 2024 03:51 PM (i0xsb)

368 A big fat burger served between two toaster waffles with a layer of pimento cheese spread is good and helps young cardiologists pay off student loans without federal help.

Posted by: bill in arkansas, not gonna comply with nuttin, waiting for the 0300 knock on the door at October 27, 2024 03:51 PM (gm9Sb)

369 Unburdened by what was posted before, we had a bunch of volunteer tomato plants this year, apparently fermented into viability in the compost pile.

It looks like we get a single tomato from the entire lot.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) takes pride at October 27, 2024 03:51 PM (aD39U)

370 Eagles are pimp-slapping the Bengals

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 03:51 PM (/7KEl)

371 Palerider, change the fuel filter if you have not. Also, how long after the last fill-up before you had problems?

Posted by: fd at October 27, 2024 03:51 PM (vFG9F)

372 Hawaiian burger with charred pineapple ring and sweet teriyaki sauce is yes subversive but worth it.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at October 27, 2024 03:51 PM (RIvkX)

373 Skip the carb-loading bun and have a bigger burger.

Posted by: SFGoth at October 27, 2024 03:52 PM (KAi1n)

374 >>>The computer possibility would suck because that would be the second failure of the same thing in two years.
Posted by: PaleRider
-----------

Electronics are a wonder when they work. Fuel pump on my F-150 was a mystery problem for me until it was identified.

Posted by: Braenyard at October 27, 2024 03:52 PM (Dng1D)

375 LOL. Jak. That sounds like an awful design to have the fuel pump so inaccessible. But no way are my mechanical abilities at the level to do that anyway. And my trailer hitch is on a steel plate bolted to the frame through the bed, so that would probably interfere with cutting a hole in the pickup bed.

Posted by: PaleRider at October 27, 2024 03:53 PM (CKOCg)

376 Also had brunch earlier at a local pub. Got a BELT (BLT with a fried egg) on rye toast. Loaded with bacon and it included bottomless Bloody Marys or Mimosas. $10.35

Not a typo. $10.35

Posted by: IrishEi at October 27, 2024 03:53 PM (3ImbR)

377 Got Ruth, Sonny, Finn and Diana bathed this afternoon. 10 dogs in 2 days. I hurt all over.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

The Three Stooges had an automated, assembly line style dog wash. I think it was in the short-"Calling All Curs".

Posted by: Modern Marvels at October 27, 2024 03:54 PM (nS6qG)

378 Na, I like big bun and oversized hamburger

Posted by: Skip at October 27, 2024 03:54 PM (fwDg9)

379 Posted by: Eromero at October 27, 2024 03:50 PM (LHPAg)

Roger that. But of you can’t pull the bed, it makes it much easier, Then you can just tack the cut piece back on. If its the fuel pump.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at October 27, 2024 03:55 PM (Aoykm)

380
If those were cats you'd hurt all over AND need a transfusion.
Posted by: Ciampino - Do they still smell after a bath? at October 27, 2024 03:51 PM (i0xsb)

_______

The older dogs are accustomed to it, but even the puppies behaved well. Still, it meant lifting lardasses like 120-pound Sonny into the tub. And nobody likes their nails ground.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at October 27, 2024 03:55 PM (EsZUh)

381 An English muffin is only 130 cal and can easily hold a burger of any size.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at October 27, 2024 03:55 PM (RIvkX)

382 Posted by: PaleRider at October 27, 2024 03:44 PM (CKOCg)

Cut a hole in your bed and change the fuel pump that way. Better than crawling under, unstrapping the tank and filling your head with road dust.
Posted by: Jak Sucio

AOP bought a Jeep Cherokee that someone had added sugar to the gas and did that to replace the fuel pump.
Welding the bed back up is also part of that job in case you missed that requirement.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at October 27, 2024 03:55 PM (Iq0J2)

383 337 I'm in the market for a new fridge, so if anyone has made a recent purchase and has a recommendation, I'm listening
Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 03:38 PM (/7KEl)

We're having good luck with our LG-made Kenmore Elite. Must be at least ten years old now. I really like the bottom drawer freezer and the icemaker makes trapezoidal prism-shaped ice cubes. These ice cubes don't send your drink around outside of your lips like the half-moon ones do. Also, they are not heated to cause them to release from the mold like half-moons are. Half-moons freeze together in clumps because they are wet when they release and re-freeze.

We do not have any dispensers in the door. I don't know anyone who has one that works reliably. I'm perfectly content with scooping ice from the freezer bin.

Posted by: Emmie at October 27, 2024 03:55 PM (5kCS7)

384

Mai Green Curry prawns last night was spectacular, but it is a little bit frisky on the way out today!

Posted by: Ouch! at October 27, 2024 03:55 PM (YdEcD)

385 French fries have no business in a burger or burrito. Side, ok, inside, no.
Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in Solidarity with the Struggle at October 27, 2024 03:44 PM (xKEhr)
~~~~~

But what about White Castles?!!?!

Posted by: IrishEi at October 27, 2024 03:56 PM (3ImbR)

386 Posted by: PaleRider at October 27, 2024 03:53 PM (CKOCg)

Mist fuel pumps on trucks past 92-95 are in the top of the gas tank.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at October 27, 2024 03:56 PM (Aoykm)

387 As it happens I have a lunch date for burgers tomorrow at Louie's Original on Potrero Hill.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at October 27, 2024 03:56 PM (RIvkX)

388 >>I'm in the market for a new fridge, so if anyone has made a recent purchase and has a recommendation, I'm listening

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk

A few years back bought an almost new house that came with a Samsung. Real piece of garbage. Have had a couple of GE recently that were decent price / features and reliable.

Posted by: Aviator at October 27, 2024 03:57 PM (HQ9Sl)

389 I had a FWP, but this burger discussion is so entertaining, it can wait.

BTW:
Crown
Grilled mushrooms
Swiss cheese
Burger patty
Bottom

If a traditional burger, just keep the catsup separated from the tomato slices.

Posted by: Weak Geek at October 27, 2024 03:57 PM (p/isN)

390 Loaded with bacon and it included bottomless Bloody Marys or Mimosas. $10.35

Not a typo. $10.35
Posted by: IrishEi

Where do you live again?

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at October 27, 2024 03:57 PM (Iq0J2)

391 Loaded with bacon and it included bottomless Bloody Marys or Mimosas. $10.35

Not a typo. $10.35
Posted by: IrishEi
------
Is that a typo?

Posted by: Weasel at October 27, 2024 03:59 PM (oYVkg)

392 >Have had a couple of GE recently that were decent price / features and reliable.

Posted by: Aviator
---
current fridge is a GE
it was here when I moved in, long ago, so might be as old as the building (1985)
works great, looks like hell

Posted by: Don Black, now with twice the funk at October 27, 2024 03:59 PM (/7KEl)

393 FOODIE NOODIE TIME

Posted by: Skip at October 27, 2024 04:00 PM (fwDg9)

394 Recently, I have been ordering my burgers without the lettuce and tomato. Almost all tomatos other than garden grown are tasteless and the lettuce is usually overdone and often tastes like preservatives. I've gotten it down to pickle, onion and mustard, and of course cheese. Unless they offer green chilies, and they generally don't.

Posted by: Pod Hamp at October 27, 2024 04:00 PM (WSqve)

395 I'm in the market for a new fridge, so if anyone has made a recent purchase and has a recommendation, I'm listening
~~~~~

I loved my counter-depth LG but it started having major problems after just 3 years. Went to buy a new fridge at Home Depot and told the guy I would never buy an LG again. He said everyone says the same thing about their old fridge no matter the brand. Suggested I get the HD extended warranty, which I did. Very reasonable price.

Anyway, got a GE which works fine but has much less interior room and isn't nearly as well lit. I hate it and wish it would break down so I can get my LG back.

Posted by: IrishEi at October 27, 2024 04:01 PM (3ImbR)

396 Question:Biden said today that Elon came here illegally thirty years ago. That he came here on a student visa and did not enroll in grad school but went on to start a company that he sold later for $300M. Sneering that Elon dare talk about illegals. So what is the real story?

Posted by: Jen the original at October 27, 2024 04:02 PM (mbSzY)

397 392 The ex and I had a round top (not with monitor) GE fridge that my Mom and Dad bought new in the fifties. It eventually made its way to the basement as a beer fridge,and when we sold the house the new owners got it. Stopped by on a whim about 2010 and it was still going strong. Young guy that bought the house said they had gone through two new ones in the kitchen (bad luck).

Posted by: bill in arkansas, not gonna comply with nuttin, waiting for the 0300 knock on the door at October 27, 2024 04:03 PM (gm9Sb)

398 Where do you live again?
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at October 27, 2024 03:57 PM (Iq0J2)
~~~~~

God's country.

Where the big tomatoes grow.

Posted by: IrishEi at October 27, 2024 04:03 PM (3ImbR)

399 God's country.

Where the big tomatoes grow.
Posted by: IrishEi at October 27, 2024 04:03 PM

Call me.

Posted by: Russ Meyer at October 27, 2024 04:08 PM (a3Q+t)

400 Bun
Mayo
Tomato
Pickles
Onion
Bacon
Cheese
Meat
Mustard
Lettuce
Bun

Lettuce on the bottom to keep the bottom bun from getting soggy.

Posted by: zonedar at October 27, 2024 04:33 PM (Slp/3)

401 The heathens of North Carolina put cole slaw on their hamburger. Fine for vinegar BBQ, but hamburger or hot dog?
Sorry, Ace, there is a bigger problem in this world. People who don't know the difference between a side and a topping.
Ahura Mazda will bring a cleansing fire to this world.

Posted by: jimmymcnulty at October 27, 2024 04:33 PM (pw1S1)

402 @349 --

Draw!

Posted by: Weak Geek at October 27, 2024 04:35 PM (p/isN)

403 Nope. The bottom bun goes in the trash with the onion.

Posted by: Marooned at October 27, 2024 04:43 PM (kt8QE)

404 I'm actually not fond of cheese on my burger anymore. I used to love it, but just lost my taste for it. But, I actually think that it might make sense to put the chees on the bottom to act as a moisture barrier. That way the burger juice won't soak the bottom bun. Then the meat, then any condiments, then veggies to taste. But, it would look weird.

Posted by: doug at October 27, 2024 05:05 PM (eWTLq)

405 Everybody knows that the lettuce goes on top, like a little security blanket to ensure none of the other toppings can slide out.

Posted by: PMRich at October 27, 2024 05:55 PM (eh5ud)

406 Way willowed as usual, but don't ever buy an in-the-door icemaker! We have a new LG fridge that is otherwise great, but the icemaker sucks! We have to buy bags of ice because the ITD icemaker is so slow.

Posted by: jayhawkone at October 27, 2024 06:07 PM (mqA4E)

407 396 Question:Biden said today that Elon came here illegally thirty years ago.
Posted by: Jen the original

It can be fun! I think even Pelosi has at least one relative who married into the family & had a few kids prior. And Hunter's wife...perhaps worthy of exploring.

The bottom line, don't start crap if you don't know where it'll land, something Joey has never been able to keep in mind.

Posted by: L - If they'll do it with you...(cell) at October 27, 2024 06:40 PM (NFX2v)

408 BAN THE TOMATO! It destroys the structural integrity of the burger and is the number one cause of slippage. It results in the sandalanche and your lunch ends up on your lap. BAN THE TOMATO. It's why ketchup exists.

Posted by: sherlockzz at October 28, 2024 10:44 AM (fAOGR)

409 I despise vegetables on the bottom. Mayo on top bun withe lettuce, sliced cherry tomatoes, pickles, onion, melted cheese, burger, mustard then bottom bun. No ketchup on burgers - save it for fries or (better) onion rings.

Mustard anywhere but next to the meat is just retarded.

Posted by: The Guy at October 28, 2024 01:04 PM (CEKnM)

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to say that I've really enjoyed ѕurfing around your bloց posts.
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Posted by: jeremy at October 31, 2024 05:56 PM (3qTtc)

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