First-World Problems...

Oh, it looks idyllic...positively peaceful and delicious! But lurking just a few seconds away is the inexorable upward push of those bubbles on the straw, and the horrid, wet, messy thump of the straw hitting the table.

Straw designs have not kept up with carbonation technology, and that is simply unacceptable in today's technologically advanced world.

Maybe the straw should be weighted. Maybe there should be a velcro attachment. Maybe there should be a tether on the lip of the glass.

I don't know, because I am not a straw engineer!

THIS SHALL NOT STAND!

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Being 1st

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 02:00 PM (fwDg9)

2 Amazon has metal straws

Posted by: Don Black at May 12, 2024 02:01 PM (/7KEl)

3 One word: stainless steel straws.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea, Radioactive Knight at May 12, 2024 02:02 PM (Be/+i)

4 Metal straws are good as long as they aren't made in West Taiwan.

Posted by: NR Pax at May 12, 2024 02:02 PM (CX+i4)

5 here

https://tinyurl.com/t36nbuh4

Posted by: Don Black at May 12, 2024 02:02 PM (/7KEl)

6 Real men don't use straws except for milkshakes.

Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:03 PM (vFG9F)

7 OK we solved that one

Posted by: Don Black at May 12, 2024 02:03 PM (/7KEl)

8 Amazon has metal straws

Posted by: Don Black at May 12, 2024 02:01 PM (/7KEl)

Straws are plastic. It is known.

Anyone who uses a hipster metal straw is in thrall to the Global Warming loons.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 12, 2024 02:03 PM (d9fT1)

9 My 1WP is motivating myself to replace bathroom ceiling fan, nothing hard about it just getting up in above ceiling crawl space and no doubt multiple trips in and out to replace it.

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 02:03 PM (fwDg9)

10 Ice. Jeez.

Posted by: Disgusted at May 12, 2024 02:03 PM (Z8Yh2)

11 I couldn't tell you lat time I had a straw, probably take out at a drive through

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 02:04 PM (fwDg9)

12 I bet a nice stainless steel straw would stay put.

Posted by: Jamaica at May 12, 2024 02:05 PM (IG7T0)

13 Simple one-ounce fish weight super glued to the straw ends all strife. Plus adds minerals to the beverage.

Posted by: Lead Pipe Cinch at May 12, 2024 02:05 PM (V5BDR)

14 I don't think the bean-counters at disposable straw manufacturer, sales, and purchaser companies care a darn about the problem you describe, CBD. Another reason you should be Emperor Of The USA - to force bean-counters everywhere to listen to engineers and consumers!

Posted by: Gref at May 12, 2024 02:05 PM (5fDan)

15 The difference between a 2016 and 2017 Q7 is astonishing.

Posted by: Jamaica at May 12, 2024 02:06 PM (IG7T0)

16 My mom always told me straws give you wrinkles around the mouth.

Posted by: redridinghood at May 12, 2024 02:06 PM (NpAcC)

17 Carbonated beverage? Fizzies? What, are you nine years old?

Posted by: Adulting Is Hard, I Guess at May 12, 2024 02:07 PM (V5BDR)

18 10 Ice. Jeez.
Posted by: Disgusted at May 12, 2024 02:03 PM (Z8Yh2)

That's my main complaint. If I wanted to drink a cup of ice, that is what I would order. Just keep the liquid cold and go from there!

Posted by: NR Pax at May 12, 2024 02:08 PM (CX+i4)

19 Can't tell ya the last time I used a straw.

Maybe when I was 7 or 8.

See no need for 'em.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at May 12, 2024 02:08 PM (R/m4+)

20 16 My mom always told me straws give you wrinkles around the mouth.

Sure, look at Kamala.

Posted by: Staubsauger at May 12, 2024 02:08 PM (V5BDR)

21 The solution to this is the same solution that I have applied in a number of other situations.

Posted by: Kamala at May 12, 2024 02:08 PM (a3Q+t)

22 You can use a paper straw and watch it disintegrate.

Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2024 02:09 PM (pZEOD)

23 We went to a place last week that didn't have straws because right next door was a Turtle Rehab center. I am not making that up. Every other place on the island we went to had straws.

Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:09 PM (vFG9F)

24 12 I bet a nice stainless steel straw would stay put.

Posted by: Jamaica at May 12, 2024 02:05 PM (IG7T0)

Ensure no one bumps your glass hard while one end of your stainless steel straw sits at the bottom of the glass and the other end is in your mouth...

Posted by: Gref at May 12, 2024 02:11 PM (5fDan)

25 I figure they didn't want to give the turtles in rehab easy access to straws to facilitate their addiction.

Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:11 PM (vFG9F)

26 If you ever get your teeth whitened and want to keep them that way, use a straw to avoid staining.

Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2024 02:11 PM (pZEOD)

27 Something MUST be done!

Posted by: Notorious BFD at May 12, 2024 02:11 PM (mH6SG)

28 Straws are a Yankee thing. Probably due to hygiene issues.

Posted by: Puddinhead at May 12, 2024 02:11 PM (/UtnQ)

29 Have you tried straightening your straw?

Posted by: wcgreen at May 12, 2024 02:13 PM (jQSQV)

30 Can’t wait to read TJMs review of Roger Corman’s body of work.

Posted by: Puddinhead at May 12, 2024 02:13 PM (/UtnQ)

31 29 Have you tried straightening your straw?
Posted by: wcgreen at May 12, 2024 02:13 PM (jQSQV)

Bob Dole can help with that ...

Posted by: zombie Bob Dole at May 12, 2024 02:13 PM (TTAGa)

32 Too much ice? No such animal.
Although I was first on the chopping block during the $7.00 per hour minimum wage war.
Now the customers do my job.

Posted by: Soda Jerk at May 12, 2024 02:14 PM (B705c)

33 I asked Mrs fd if she knew the story about turtles and straws and she said no and she didn't want to either.

Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:14 PM (vFG9F)

34 Barely remember as a kid cups with built in straws

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 02:15 PM (fwDg9)

35 Straw info you can use:

Freddie's Steakburgers has the best straws in the fast food businees. They give you this big bore/heavy walled one for shakes...I get misty just thining about it.

Posted by: Disgusted at May 12, 2024 02:15 PM (Z8Yh2)

36 So, is this the last straw?

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at May 12, 2024 02:16 PM (MEM6T)

37 BTW, I used a straw yesterday to drink a chocolate milk shake.

Posted by: Puddinhead at May 12, 2024 02:16 PM (/UtnQ)

38 Oh certainly except a slushy drink too much ice is a possibility

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 02:16 PM (fwDg9)

39 I asked Mrs fd if she knew the story about turtles and straws and she said no and she didn't want to either.
Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:14 PM

To be fair, neither do the voters of Kentucky.

Posted by: Mitch at May 12, 2024 02:17 PM (a3Q+t)

40 We still have a few long stem silver spoon straws to eat and drink up a float. They sure stay down!

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at May 12, 2024 02:17 PM (MEM6T)

41 Mcdonalds straws are also good for making quick reloaders for tube fed .22lr rifles.

Posted by: Reforger at May 12, 2024 02:18 PM (B705c)

42 *thinking not thining

Posted by: Disgusted at May 12, 2024 02:18 PM (Z8Yh2)

43 There is a Freddy Steakburger near me, never tried it.

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 02:18 PM (fwDg9)

44 For metal straw proponents:

Woman Dies After Being Impaled by Reusable Metal Straw

The woman... was carrying a glass with a 10-inch-long stainless-steel straw when she fell and the straw impaled her eye, causing fatal brain injuries

https://is.gd/metal_straw_death

Posted by: olddog in mo at May 12, 2024 02:18 PM (ju2Fy)

45 Barely remember as a kid cups with built in straws
Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 02:15 PM (fwDg9)
-

Still readily available.

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at May 12, 2024 02:19 PM (MEM6T)

46 The last Soda Jerk was killed by.....

...... Quick Straw McGraw.

Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at May 12, 2024 02:19 PM (e6UQI)

47 Jim

Groan.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at May 12, 2024 02:19 PM (u82oZ)

48 Massive wildfires in Alberta. I hope it's not a problem for AOP. Is Canada a first world country anyway?

Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:20 PM (vFG9F)

49 I don't know, because I am not a straw engineer!

THIS SHALL NOT STAND!

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM

You may not be a straw engineer, but you may be a straw man!

Posted by: tbodie, Lurker. Unless you are reading this at May 12, 2024 02:20 PM (ofCHO)

50 Straws are for fags.

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 12, 2024 02:20 PM (4IYrQ)

51 Freddies fries take some getting used to. Smaller cut, I struggle to shove enough into my maw.

Posted by: Disgusted at May 12, 2024 02:21 PM (Z8Yh2)

52 "Straws are for fags.
Posted by: nurse ratched"

How do you handle milkshakes?

Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:21 PM (vFG9F)

53 My usual go to for fast food is Wendy's, should try others newly moved into my area

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 02:24 PM (fwDg9)

54 Spoon.

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 12, 2024 02:24 PM (XESzo)

55 How do you handle milkshakes?
Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:21 PM (vFG9F)

With a mustache and an ice cream headache.

Posted by: Reforger at May 12, 2024 02:25 PM (B705c)

56 Milk shakes are a must with a straw

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 02:25 PM (fwDg9)

57 Afternoon.

Posted by: Robert at May 12, 2024 02:25 PM (1Yy3c)

58 Those reusable straws are disgusting. There's no way to really get them clean wothout a lot of effort.

And anyone using a straw to drink a cocktail gets shot.

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 12, 2024 02:25 PM (XESzo)

59 Contemplate the left's rationalizing a paper straw in a plastic wrapper, dispensed from a plastic container.

All of it eventually going into the same trashcan.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at May 12, 2024 02:27 PM (Q4IgG)

60 Straws are for fags.
Posted by: nurse ratched at May 12, 2024 02:20 PM (4IYrQ)

And kids with their upper lip stitched back together. I split my lip when I was seven or so and couldn't drink out of a cup for a week.

Posted by: Kindltot at May 12, 2024 02:27 PM (D7oie)

61 Can the crazystraw of my youth actually be cleaned?

I say no, no it can't.

Posted by: Disgusted at May 12, 2024 02:28 PM (Z8Yh2)

62 Hello nurse, glad to hear you're doing well. It was reported that your physician is a .45 ACP shooter, so our prayers were answered.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at May 12, 2024 02:28 PM (a3Q+t)

63 "Spoon.
Posted by: nurse ratched"

Might as well have ice cream then.

Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:29 PM (vFG9F)

64 This is not a democracy, this is ANARCHY!

Posted by: straw warrior at May 12, 2024 02:29 PM (Y03KH)

65

Straws are just cocks by proxy. Suck it, bitches!

Posted by: Just Sayin at May 12, 2024 02:29 PM (W6cgv)

66 Spoon.
Posted by: nurse ratched at May 12, 2024 02:24 PM (XESzo)

I was catching up on the ONT and saw that you had an emergency appendectomy. Bummer. Sucks that it spoiled your date and Momma's Day but I'm glad you're doing well.

Couple of questions.

Since you're a nurse did you assist in the procedure while also lying on the table? That would be kinda freakin' metal, bruh.

Can you post pictures of the scar for us?

Posted by: Robert at May 12, 2024 02:30 PM (1Yy3c)

67 Those reusable straws are disgusting. There's no way to really get them clean wothout a lot of effort.

And anyone using a straw to drink a cocktail gets shot.
Posted by: nurse ratched at May 12, 2024 02:25 PM (XESzo)

How are you feeling, Nurse?

Just getting set to lock up the house here in AJ, and put the Suburban in going-home gear.

Going to head out back and turn the water and some of the power off, and then I will come back in here, and power down the computer, lock the doors, and hit the tarmac.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 12, 2024 02:30 PM (8zz6B)

68 True fact: Straws contribute to brain freeze.

Posted by: olddog in mo at May 12, 2024 02:30 PM (ju2Fy)

69 Oh, and was your doctor handsome with strong yet gentle hands like I prayed for for you?

Posted by: Robert at May 12, 2024 02:31 PM (1Yy3c)

70 My wife got us Boba tea. (for those of you not in the know, it is traditionally a cold milky tea with tapioca pearls in it. Very Asian.) It comes with a really broad, heavy-duty straw to suck the tapioca pearls up with the tea.

I didn't like mine too much, so since my wife was driving and we hit the state highway, I started shooting the tapioca pearls at the road signs as we went past.

then I noticed she was slowing down as each sign got close so I could have a better shot . . .

Posted by: Kindltot at May 12, 2024 02:32 PM (D7oie)

71 5 here

https://tinyurl.com/t36nbuh4
Posted by: Don Black
-------------------------------

And if necessary, you can stab someone with it.
I mean push come to shove, you know.

Posted by: Braenyard at May 12, 2024 02:32 PM (lCWOD)

72 The left had a meltdown when Jesse Watters showed a picture of Biden drinking with a straw and declared manly men shouldn't drink through a straw.

Posted by: redridinghood at May 12, 2024 02:33 PM (NpAcC)

73 58 Those reusable straws are disgusting. There's no way to really get them clean wothout a lot of effort.

And anyone using a straw to drink a cocktail gets shot.

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 12, 2024 02:25 PM (XESzo)

ATTENTION Non-Horde guests of TxMoMe attendees!

Posted by: Gref at May 12, 2024 02:33 PM (5fDan)

74 then I noticed she was slowing down as each sign got close so I could have a better shot . . .
Posted by: Kindltot at May 12, 2024 02:32 PM (D7oie)

If there's a useful definition of love it's that right there.

Posted by: Robert at May 12, 2024 02:33 PM (1Yy3c)

75 Most people think of straws as a modern invention. In fact, the first straws were invented by the Aztecs. They found that hollow femurs made drinking from their enemy's skulls much easier and neater.

Posted by: Straw Facts at May 12, 2024 02:33 PM (vFG9F)

76 A brain freeze will stop a migraine headache in its tracks.

And Robert, I got general anesthesia. So no audience participation.

I have three scars. All pretty small. I'm at the beach right now soaking in some sunshine. I am pretty darn sore though.

Posted by: nurse ratched at May 12, 2024 02:33 PM (XESzo)

77 Since you're a nurse did you assist in the procedure while also lying on the table? That would be kinda freakin' metal, bruh.
----------
Stephen Maturin operating on himself comes to mind.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea, Radioactive Knight at May 12, 2024 02:34 PM (Be/+i)

78 76 Most people think of straws as a modern invention. In fact, the first straws were invented by the Aztecs. They found that hollow femurs made drinking from their enemy's skulls much easier and neater.
Posted by: Straw Facts at May 12, 2024 02:33 PM (vFG9F)

I'll wait for ZOD to confirm that ...

Posted by: brownodg with head tilted at May 12, 2024 02:34 PM (TTAGa)

79 I like to use a straw on the (infrequent, these days) times I have a milkshake/malted. Brings back simpler days of youth.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea, Radioactive Knight at May 12, 2024 02:36 PM (Be/+i)

80 Okay, this is as good a place as any to ask. I may be buying a teardrop trailer. And there's a good possibility I'll be buying from a private party, probably in another state. What is the best way to go about this?

Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 02:36 PM (yeEu9)

81 76 Most people think of straws as a modern invention. In fact, the first straws were invented by the Aztecs. They found that hollow femurs made drinking from their enemy's skulls much easier and neater.

Posted by: Straw Facts at May 12, 2024 02:33 PM (vFG9F)

We never get any respect!

Posted by: Ancient Egyptian Irrigation Engineers at May 12, 2024 02:38 PM (5fDan)

82 Straws like smoking will wrinkle your upper libs.
Of course if you've used straws and/or smokes your whole life you already have the wrinkles so suck away.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at May 12, 2024 02:38 PM (ACqXF)

83 Off to the Great White North!

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 12, 2024 02:38 PM (8zz6B)

84 I dunno, Nurse, with Robert praying like that, it should have helped.

Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 02:39 PM (yeEu9)

85 Most people think of straws as a modern invention. In fact, the first straws were invented by the Aztecs. They found that hollow femurs made drinking from their enemy's skulls much easier and neater.

Posted by: Straw Facts at May 12, 2024 02:33 PM (vFG9F)

We never get any respect!
Posted by: Ancient Egyptian Irrigation Engineers at May 12, 2024 02:38 PM (5fDan)
----------
Screw you guys!

Posted by: Chimpanzees at May 12, 2024 02:39 PM (Be/+i)

86 Off to the Great White North!
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at May 12, 2024 02:38 PM (8zz6B)

Safe travels.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Come Sail Away with me, You guys at May 12, 2024 02:39 PM (l+fvR)

87 "Straws are a Yankee thing."

'Fraid not. The only places that routinely give you straws here in central Texas are Mexican restaurants.

Posted by: Art Rondelet of Malmsey at May 12, 2024 02:39 PM (FEVMW)

88 So...is it time to rethink sippy-cup lids?

Posted by: Diogenes at May 12, 2024 02:39 PM (W/lyH)

89 So...is it time to rethink sippy-cup lids?
Posted by: Diogenes at May 12, 2024 02:39 PM (W/lyH)
----------
Only if you're sid.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea, Radioactive Knight at May 12, 2024 02:40 PM (Be/+i)

90 Stupid paper straws.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 12, 2024 02:41 PM (Ds3Rc)

91 Paper straws had to be invented by a Communist bureaucrat

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 02:44 PM (fwDg9)

92 Okay, this is as good a place as any to ask. I may be buying a teardrop trailer. And there's a good possibility I'll be buying from a private party, probably in another state. What is the best way to go about this?
Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 02:36 PM (yeEu9)

Probably take it to a shop and have them look at the frame and running gear to make sure it isn't rusted out or they didn't haul it over giant rocks. The shop can take a look at the electrics as well. Maybe run it through a carwash to look for leaks.
Most of the rest is fixible.

Posted by: Kindltot at May 12, 2024 02:44 PM (D7oie)

93 Not So Thorough - Insurance. Talk to your agent about this. Unlikely to have trouble, but the consequences can be large.

Hitch height. Make sure a brake controller is working on the tow vehicle if required. The seller will be skittery about good funds payment. You should be skittery about a valid title.

How old are the tires? Lots of potential gotchas, should go great but I purchased locally because I didn’t want the hassles.

Posted by: Common Tater at May 12, 2024 02:46 PM (aPa7n)

94 Oh, also check the code on the tires, they are date coded, and even if it was a garage queen the tires get old and fragile.

Posted by: Kindltot at May 12, 2024 02:46 PM (D7oie)

95 58

And anyone using a straw to drink a cocktail gets shot.
Posted by: nurse ratched

May I apply for an exception to avoid teeth staining?

Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2024 02:46 PM (p4NUW)

96 17 Carbonated beverage? Fizzies? What, are you nine years old?

Posted by: Adulting Is Hard, I Guess at May 12, 2024 02:07 PM (V5BDR)
----
So 9 year olds are beer drinkers?

You don't drink beer?

Posted by: Ciampino - loose leaves sink mowers!? at May 12, 2024 02:46 PM (qfLjt)

97 Men should never drink from a straw. It just looks femmy.
(Exceptions made if you are hospitalized and your jaw is wired shut.)

Posted by: gourmand du jour at May 12, 2024 02:46 PM (MeG8a)

98 I only drink beer through a straw.

Posted by: Charlie Sykes at May 12, 2024 02:47 PM (Y8lzz)

99 May I apply for an exception to avoid teeth staining?
Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2024 02:46 PM (p4NUW)
----------
?

Do you drink a lot of creme de menthe?

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea, Radioactive Knight at May 12, 2024 02:47 PM (Be/+i)

100 That straw was clearly not designed in Australia.

Why?

Because Oz never did give nothing to the straw man that he didn't...didn't already have.

Posted by: Muldoon at May 12, 2024 02:48 PM (991eG)

101 With these trailers, I'm not as worried about the frame handling it. Most of the models are designed for boondocking and it will be a fairly new one

It's the paying for it and transfering title part that I'm not sure about. I know I could get a trip permit if I need it.Do I take big rolls of cash with me? Set up the deal, leave a down oayment and drive back out with a cashier's check?

Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 02:48 PM (yeEu9)

102 82 you already have the wrinkles so suck away.

this is about me, isn't it?

Posted by: mamala at May 12, 2024 02:48 PM (edU/H)

103 May I apply for an exception to avoid teeth staining?
Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2024 02:46 PM (p4NUW)

a nasogastric tube works just as well . . .

Posted by: Kindltot at May 12, 2024 02:49 PM (D7oie)

104 99

Do you drink a lot of creme de menthe?
Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the

Red wine. Anything with coke. Iced tea. Cranberry juice. Coffee.

Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2024 02:49 PM (p4NUW)

105
Massive wildfires in Alberta. I hope it's not a problem for AOP. Is Canada a first world country anyway?

Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:20 PM

Not again for crying out loud. The air here in SE PA last year was so foul and thick with smoke it was disgusting.

I think the leftist climate folks are setting these fires on purpose.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at May 12, 2024 02:50 PM (RKVpM)

106 I have a large, stainless tumbler with a plastic lid and straw.

It's a must for pool side refreshments that are non-alcoholic. No (or very little) spillage into the pool.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at May 12, 2024 02:50 PM (Q4IgG)

107 Whatever the solution, make sure it still slides easily into a sea turtle's nostril.

Posted by: Jinx the Cat at May 12, 2024 02:52 PM (MLHNM)

108

If you can suck a marble through a metal straw, please submit your name and number.

Posted by: Velvet Ginourmous, Social Facilitator at May 12, 2024 02:52 PM (W6cgv)

109
Yup, you can see from the air quality map the Canadian wildfire effecting air quality in the USA already:

https://www.ventusky.com/?p=51.9;-103.7;3&l=pm25

Posted by: Divide by Zero at May 12, 2024 02:52 PM (RKVpM)

110 I have a good brake controller on the car. These are lightweight with minimal systems. Some do have solar. I'm on a FB group to get an idea about known issues. I did think about insurance and I'd likely upgrade my AAA.

Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 02:52 PM (yeEu9)

111 How do you handle milkshakes?
Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:21 PM (vFG9F)

She claims her milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. Or was that someone else?

Posted by: Pete Bog at May 12, 2024 02:53 PM (BHL6B)

112 36 So, is this the last straw?

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at May 12, 2024 02:16 PM (MEM6T)
----
No, just the one that broke the ~~camel's~~ dromedary's back.

Posted by: Ciampino - eats leaves and shoots at May 12, 2024 02:53 PM (qfLjt)

113 It's hard for me to get the metal straw jammed up into my nostril.

Posted by: Your friendly neighborhood tortoise at May 12, 2024 02:54 PM (dg+HA)

114 "I don't know, because I am not a straw engineer!"
This is a straw man argument.

Posted by: PG at May 12, 2024 02:55 PM (gQbO4)

115
The difference between a 2016 and 2017 Q7 is astonishing.

Posted by: Jamaica at May 12, 2024 02:06 PM

Most economists agree with me that the 7th quarter of the year is most challenging for the economy.

Posted by: Barack O at May 12, 2024 02:56 PM (RKVpM)

116 It's the paying for it and transfering title part that I'm not sure about. I know I could get a trip permit if I need it.Do I take big rolls of cash with me? Set up the deal, leave a down oayment and drive back out with a cashier's check?
Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 02:48 PM (yeEu9)

I am a guy, I used to buy $1.000 cars in cash. I did that because I like to dicker. If you have a settled price and a cashiers' check or money order the seller might be more relaxed. I wouldn't do it at midnight in a closed KMart parking lot.

I can't tell you the process where you are, but the DMV can.
In Oregon you take the trailer to the DMV for a bored clerk to glance at the vin and then copy it off your paperwork instead, then pay for the new plates if it is from out of state.
Make sure the person selling the trailer is the legal owner, otherwise you have to go through a lost title process. His name should be on the paperwork and be the one signing it over to you. the title transfer makes life much easier.

(we recently got a trailer for my sister and she also wanted me to buy her a cheap car without a valid owner and I said no)

Posted by: Kindltot at May 12, 2024 02:56 PM (D7oie)

117 One straw a month ought to be enough for anybody.

Posted by: AWFL Karen down the street at May 12, 2024 02:58 PM (dg+HA)

118 I think the question was more to the legal aspects from out of state private party - Lawyers anyone?

Otherwise, my two cents:
First, I look at the front line of the body where it sits on the two tongue parts. If there has been damage/water/rot there will be dents/impressions/creases where the body is sitting on the tongue.
Second, is the front of the roof and the seams where the roof and the sides come together.
Third, is any wrinkles in the interior ceiling
Fourth, what does it look like around the A/C
Fifth, water damage in the bath

Posted by: Braenyard at May 12, 2024 02:58 PM (lCWOD)

119 100 That straw was clearly not designed in Australia.

Why?

Because Oz never did give nothing to the straw man that he didn't...didn't already have.

Posted by: Muldoon at May 12, 2024 02:48 PM (991eG)
----
Straws made for the Southern Hemisphere have to be used the other way round or else will blow bubbles instead of sucking. Honest.

Posted by: Ciampino - Koala eats leaves and shoots at May 12, 2024 02:59 PM (qfLjt)

120 "metal straw jammed up into my nostril."

Rejected lines from Metallica's Master of Puppets.

Posted by: Reforger at May 12, 2024 02:59 PM (B705c)

121 "Set up the deal, leave a down oayment and drive back out with a cashier's check?
Posted by: Notsothoreau"

Personal check for the down payment. No cash or cashier check untill you close the deal and are ready to drive off.

Posted by: Straw Facts at May 12, 2024 03:00 PM (vFG9F)

122 And anyone using a straw to drink a cocktail gets shot.
Posted by: nurse ratched at May 12, 2024 02:25 PM (XESzo)

Clearly the surgery left her bile duct intact.

Posted by: Pete Bog at May 12, 2024 03:00 PM (BHL6B)

123 CBD, have you tried drinking your fizzies in zero gravity?

Posted by: Ciampino - Koala eats leaves and shoots! at May 12, 2024 03:00 PM (qfLjt)

124 Looks like a Sprite!

May I have some of your tasty beverage to wash this down?

Posted by: Jules at May 12, 2024 03:00 PM (8sMut)

125 The Bee’s headline proclaimed, “Uighur Slaves Struggling to Keep Up with Demand for Palestinian Headscarves.”

Posted by: pawn at May 12, 2024 03:01 PM (QB+5g)

126 Barky certainly set up more than his fair share of straw men

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 03:01 PM (fwDg9)

127 Yeah, I know about the no title thing. Husband wound up with a neat old truck and the guy just couldn't find the title that day. Then stopped returning calls. It would be easier if I bought some place closer to home, and could easily get a cashiers check and go back to pick it up. But this is all still in the future so I've got time to see what turns up.

Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 03:01 PM (yeEu9)

128 116 It's the paying for it and transfering title part that I'm not sure about. I know I could get a trip permit if I need it.Do I take big rolls of cash with me? Set up the deal, leave a down oayment and drive back out with a cashier's check?
Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 02:48 PM (yeEu9)

I am a guy, I used to buy $1.000 cars in cash. I did that because I like to dicker. If you have a settled price and a cashiers' check or money order the seller might be more relaxed. I wouldn't do it at midnight in a closed KMart parking lot.
-------------------------------------------------

Take a friend with you. -- NaCl

Posted by: Braenyard at May 12, 2024 03:02 PM (lCWOD)

129 I’m cooking spagetti/meatballs. After awhile gonna try sipping Dripping Springs vodka. Through a straw.

Posted by: Eromero at May 12, 2024 03:02 PM (NxC5+)

130 Most economists agree with me that the 7th quarter of the year is most challenging for the economy.
Posted by: Barack O at May 12, 2024 02:56 PM (RKVpM)

Your keen eye is the astrolabe of the substantive sun. Your truth discerning heart is the celestial observatory of attributes. Can you tell us, is it hard being as perfect as you are?

Posted by: U.S. Media at May 12, 2024 03:03 PM (8sMut)

131 On a related note, I've heard they're putting pickles in Dr. Pepper in Texas. Are y'all alright down there?

[bzzzzt FLASH! a man steps out of a portal] You there sir, Sir! Are giraffes green and also can they fly?

no and no

[looks around] Ok, the sky is blue and up while grass is green and down, that's good,... Hey you again has most of Europe been overthrown by a cult of evil unicyclists that worship a brazen statue of Pauly Shore? ANSWER ME!

What? No man.

Maybe I did it... I'm back. It's been so long. A thousand universes... I'm... I'M HOME!

Dude are you ok, here have a drink, It's Dr. Pepper.

Oh,... thanks, I remember now, always liked Dr. Pepper... hmmm... There's something floating in it?

Oh yeah, everyone puts pickles in their Dr. Pep...

AHHHHHHGGGGGGG!
[fade to black]

Posted by: banana Dream at May 12, 2024 03:04 PM (Y6IkP)

132

'Historical Black' Howard University riots during nursing collage graduation.

Can we just give them Louisiana and Mississippi and wall the goddamn place off to save the rest of the country?

Posted by: The Poopyhead at May 12, 2024 03:05 PM (W6cgv)

133 Do I take big rolls of cash with me? Set up the deal, leave a down oayment and drive back out with a cashier's check?
Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 02:48 PM (yeEu9)

Not sure how fully you’ve embraced payment technology or the dollars involved but this seems like a perfect PayPal or Venmo solution.

Posted by: Pete Bog at May 12, 2024 03:05 PM (BHL6B)

134 "I am a guy, I used to buy $1.000 cars in cash."

I've done plenty of those. Hard cold cash can close the deal in your favor. I don't offer that until all other bargaining is done though.

Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 03:05 PM (vFG9F)

135 129 I’m cooking spagetti/meatballs. After awhile gonna try sipping Dripping Springs vodka. Through a straw.
Posted by: Eromero at May 12, 2024 03:02 PM (NxC5+)

Well we got us a spegetti western on 36
I like spegetti westerns
I like the way the boots are all reverbed out
Walking across the hardwood floors
In fact, everything's got
That big reverb sound
Well what'll I do now?
Go to sleep
Pull the pud
We need new pornos
Well, I guess I'm still writing

Posted by: Primus at May 12, 2024 03:05 PM (8sMut)

136 Your keen eye is the astrolabe of the substantive sun. Your truth discerning heart is the celestial observatory of attributes. Can you tell us, is it hard being as perfect as you are?
Posted by: U.S. Media at May 12, 2024 03:03 PM (8sMut)
====
The media never treat us fairly!
/the left

Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 12, 2024 03:05 PM (RIvkX)

137 The Jews infiltrated the Duke commencement!

Watch: Anti-Israel protesters walked out of Duke graduation commencement because they invited a Jewish speaker ... Jerry Seinfeld.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I've Been Through the Desert On a Horse With No Shame at May 12, 2024 03:06 PM (L/fGl)

138 127 Yeah, I know about the no title thing. Husband wound up with a neat old truck and the guy just couldn't find the title that day. Then stopped returning calls. It would be easier if I bought some place closer to home, and could easily get a cashiers check and go back to pick it up. But this is all still in the future so I've got time to see what turns up.
Posted by: Notsothoreau at May

Hopefully he can just order a lost title from his DMV, assuming he calls you back. If the vehicle is more than 35 years old (20 for a trailer), you don’t even need a title. If this is applicable, maybe you have something similar in your state?

Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2024 03:07 PM (BgmlQ)

139 It's too bad Jack Straw isn't here to defend the family name.

Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, what just woke up from a nap at May 12, 2024 03:07 PM (PiwSw)

140 It's the paying for it and transfering title part that I'm not sure about. I know I could get a trip permit if I need it.Do I take big rolls of cash with me? Set up the deal, leave a down oayment and drive back out with a cashier's check?
Posted by: Notsothoreau

Last time I bought a motorcycle out of State I went to the sellers bank and wrote a check, the bank put a 'lock' on the funds at my credit union. No problems at all.

2 month ago I rented a Nucamp 320 css, before I could pick it up I had to put in an electric brake controller. I bought an installed a Redact Tow Pro Liberty. We really like how it worked, we didn't even know the trailer was there while towing.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at May 12, 2024 03:07 PM (ACqXF)

141 No bath in these. Outside clamshell kitchen with small water tank. They do have AC. From what I've found out, the design on these has a good record of preventing water damage. I've read that the weatherstriping around the windows sometimes need to be redone. I'm thinking that a preCovid trailer might be a better choice than a newer one. I know they depreciate like crazy, but these seem to hold their value pretty well.

Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 03:09 PM (yeEu9)

142 109
Yup, you can see from the air quality map the Canadian wildfire effecting air quality in the USA already:

https://www.ventusky.com/?p=51.9;-103.7;3&l=pm25
Posted by: Divide by Zero at May 12, 2024 02:52 PM (RKVpM)

Not a good time to be driving the ALCAN.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 12, 2024 03:09 PM (8sMut)

143 131
Oh yeah, everyone puts pickles in their Dr. Pep...

AHHHHHHGGGGGGG!
[fade to black]
Posted by: banana Dream at May

How many Celsius have you had today? 😂

Wasn’t there some peanuts in coke thing, too? Both sound gross. You know what isn’t gross? Fried pickles. They are yummy.

Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2024 03:09 PM (BgmlQ)

144 >>My mom always told me straws give you wrinkles around the mouth.

It's true.

Posted by: JackStraw at May 12, 2024 03:09 PM (LkLld)

145 >>> Wasn’t there some peanuts in coke thing, too? Both sound gross. You know what isn’t gross? Fried pickles. They are yummy.
Posted by: Piper at May 12, 2024 03:09 PM (BgmlQ)

Oh I'm with you on the fried pickles. Zaxby's around here has those as a side and I'm always gonna choose them.

Posted by: banana Dream at May 12, 2024 03:11 PM (Y6IkP)

146 132

'Historical Black' Howard University riots during nursing collage graduation.

Can we just give them Louisiana and Mississippi and wall the goddamn place off to save the rest of the country?
Posted by: The Poopyhead at May 12, 2024 03:05 PM (W6cgv)

Rioting might have woken me up from the ones I endured.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 12, 2024 03:12 PM (8sMut)

147 Watch: Anti-Israel protesters walked out of Duke graduation commencement because they invited a Jewish speaker ... Jerry Seinfeld.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, I've Been Through the Desert On a Horse With No Shame at May 12, 2024 03:06 PM (L/fGl)
===

Bye, Felicia.

Felicias.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at May 12, 2024 03:12 PM (RIvkX)

148 The "bile duct" line was a good one.

Posted by: Disgusted at May 12, 2024 03:13 PM (Z8Yh2)

149 75 Most people think of straws as a modern invention. In fact, the first straws were invented by the Aztecs. They found that hollow femurs made drinking from their enemy's skulls much easier and neater.

Posted by: Straw Facts at May 12, 2024 02:33 PM (vFG9F)
----
Well yes, when they tried hollow plant straws (to save the Erf) they kept blocking as the blood coagulated. Spoons were called for then.

Posted by: Ciampino - Koala eats, shoots and leaves at May 12, 2024 03:14 PM (qfLjt)

150 Doh! Redarc!

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at May 12, 2024 03:14 PM (ACqXF)

151 If you use a straw backwards you'll get warts.

Posted by: Muldoon at May 12, 2024 03:14 PM (991eG)

152 I want a NuCamp T@g. It's lighterweight than the 320 T@b. When I had the brake controller put in, at a trailer place, the guy told me it was actually for trailers heavier than I can pull. It worked great with the utility trailer.

Nearest dealers are in CO, MO and OK. I'm just trying to think through how this would work.

Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 03:14 PM (yeEu9)

153 Straws? you will have have to settle for a Straw Commissar from Newsomfornia, Comrade.

Posted by: Charles Martel at May 12, 2024 03:14 PM (EBbHR)

154
Watch: Anti-Israel protesters walked out of Duke graduation commencement because they invited a Jewish speaker ... Jerry Seinfeld.

Jerry: "That's a shame."
Elaine: "Get out of here."

Posted by: Barack O at May 12, 2024 03:15 PM (RKVpM)

155 I hope these hamas groupies wake to see their doctor’s name is Goldstein, just like happens to them in Israel.

Posted by: Eromero at May 12, 2024 03:16 PM (NxC5+)

156 Didn't you get the memo? Only haters of Gaia use straws.

Posted by: Halfhand at May 12, 2024 03:16 PM (7XQ/q)

157 Oh yeah, everyone puts pickles in their Dr. Pep...

AHHHHHHGGGGGGG!
[fade to black]
Posted by: banana Dream at May

I read that and immediately wondered how Rod Serling would have narrated the ending?

Posted by: Diogenes at May 12, 2024 03:18 PM (W/lyH)

158 I think I remember a Jonny Quest episode where he escaped from some 3rd world savages by using bamboo as a snorkel to swim by silently underwater.

Then he threw the bamboo away and said only fags use straws.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at May 12, 2024 03:19 PM (R/m4+)

159 I want a NuCamp T@g. It's lighterweight than the 320 T@b. When I had the brake controller put in, at a trailer place, the guy told me it was actually for trailers heavier than I can pull. It worked great with the utility trailer.

Nearest dealers are in CO, MO and OK. I'm just trying to think through how this would work.
Posted by: Notsothoreau

We've rented a t@g, nice unit.
We rented the t@b; internal bathroom for night visits the last time.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at May 12, 2024 03:20 PM (ACqXF)

160
What the hell is it with Canada and wildfires? I couldn't set the forest I live under on fire with anything short of a massive amount of accelerant. Even at that it would fizzle out after a quarter mile.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at May 12, 2024 03:21 PM (RKVpM)

161 Your vehicle can handle a camper big enough for a bath with no problem.

Posted by: Braenyard at May 12, 2024 03:21 PM (lCWOD)

162 A cigarette is a paper straw for smoking tobacco.
AKA Fag.

Posted by: Reforger at May 12, 2024 03:23 PM (B705c)

163 129 I’m cooking spagetti/meatballs. After awhile gonna try sipping Dripping Springs vodka. Through a straw.

Posted by: Eromero at May 12, 2024 03:02 PM (NxC5+)
----
Better watchout for Nurse. She's sore and mean today and wants to shoot straw users. While I'm here: it's spaghetti.

Posted by: The Strawman & Grammar Police at May 12, 2024 03:23 PM (qfLjt)

164 What the hell is it with Canada and wildfires? I couldn't set the forest I live under on fire with anything short of a massive amount of accelerant. Even at that it would fizzle out after a quarter mile.
Posted by: Divide by Zero

California coastal range vegetation is called 'climax vegetation' it *expects* to be burned off every 7 to 25 years.
In some areas of CA it has been 75 years since it burned off. CA where they help fires be all they can be.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at May 12, 2024 03:24 PM (ACqXF)

165 I like to dicker

To be fair, how you say, don't we all?

Posted by: Paolo at May 12, 2024 03:25 PM (a3Q+t)

166 Are mentally ill men in dresses demanding attention on Mother's Day?

Posted by: Northernlurker at May 12, 2024 03:26 PM (zRKQy)

167 I had a 20' four wheel, don't remember the brand, trailer w/full bath, four burner stove/oven. Furnace heat and roof air.
I pulled it with a 6.2 diesel Suburban and also with a 350-V8 Suburban - no problem. It's gross weight was over 5K.

Posted by: Braenyard at May 12, 2024 03:26 PM (lCWOD)

168 Is this the same fire that was burning last year?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 12, 2024 03:26 PM (63Dwl)

169 I anxiously await the satelite images of four fires starting at the same time, as happened recently.

At this point it could be the US Space Force starting these things.

Posted by: Disgusted at May 12, 2024 03:27 PM (Z8Yh2)

170 Better watchout for Nurse. She's sore and mean today and wants to shoot straw users.
Posted by: The Strawman & Grammar Police at May 12, 2024 03:23 PM

Not to mention she's seen the light and is now a .45 ACP-only shooter.

Posted by: Paolo at May 12, 2024 03:27 PM (a3Q+t)

171 I think I remember a Jonny Quest episode where he escaped from some 3rd world savages by using bamboo as a snorkel to swim by silently underwater.

*******

When using bamboo as a snorkel to escape savages it is essential to ensure that the bamboo is long enough to reach the surface, while simultaneously not being so long that its internal volume exceeds your average tidal volume.

Rebreathing your expired CO2 is bad for your health. As is breathing water.

Posted by: Muldoon at May 12, 2024 03:28 PM (991eG)

172 At this point it could be the US Space Force starting these things.
Posted by: Disgusted at May 12, 2024 03:27 PM (Z8Yh2)

Assuming the government is competent.

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 12, 2024 03:30 PM (8sMut)

173 Tidal volume is the volume of air moved into or out of the lungs in one breath.

Posted by: Muldoon at May 12, 2024 03:30 PM (991eG)

174 When using bamboo as a snorkel to escape savages it is essential to ensure that the bamboo is long enough to reach the surface, while simultaneously not being so long that its internal volume exceeds your average tidal volume.

Rebreathing your expired CO2 is bad for your health. As is breathing water.

Posted by: Muldoon at May 12, 2024 03:28 PM (991eG)

How do you tell the direction on a bamboo straw. I don't want to get warts.

Posted by: Reforger at May 12, 2024 03:31 PM (B705c)

175 Not to mention she's seen the light and is now a .45 ACP-only shooter.
Posted by: Paolo at May 12, 2024 03:27 PM (a3Q+t)

Funny how the .45 snobs will not step in front of a 9mm.

: o )

Posted by: Catch Thirty-Thr33 at May 12, 2024 03:31 PM (8sMut)

176 6 Real men
Posted by: fd at May 12, 2024 02:03 PM (vFG9F)

One of the last places on the internet where this can still be said.

Posted by: m at May 12, 2024 03:32 PM (o3SCB)

177 My local pizza shop has a sign that says, "Straws only given upon request" right above a huge box of plastic straws.

Posted by: IrishEi at May 12, 2024 03:32 PM (3ImbR)

178
We, briefly, had a trailer. Her Majesty didn't like it. She loves her Class C RV. I don't. Like being in a coffin.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 12, 2024 03:32 PM (MoZTd)

179 Whatever did we do before straws?

Posted by: Jak Sucio at May 12, 2024 03:34 PM (Aoykm)

180 151 If you use a straw backwards you'll get warts.

Posted by: Muldoon at May 12, 2024 03:14 PM (991eG)
----
Where?

Posted by: Ciampino - Koala eats shoots and leaves!! at May 12, 2024 03:35 PM (qfLjt)

181 For gods sake get one of those metal straws.

This isn’t a a first world problem. This is a non-problem.

Shove it in again. After the first surge of bubbles it no longer has any buoyancy force and it’s done.

Posted by: Justin Pinochet Castreau at May 12, 2024 03:35 PM (V8yYW)

182 Just remembered I have used a straw to drink draught beer after dentist visit and novocaine hadn't worn off. .

Posted by: olddog in mo at May 12, 2024 03:35 PM (ju2Fy)

183 36 So, is this the last straw?
Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at May 12, 2024 02:16 PM (MEM6T)

heh

Posted by: m at May 12, 2024 03:35 PM (o3SCB)

184 www.today.com/health/health/metal-straw-

punctures-throat-artery-brain-rcna45635

Posted by: Justin Pinochet Castreau at May 12, 2024 03:36 PM (V8yYW)

185 When using bamboo as a snorkel to escape savages it is essential to ensure that the bamboo is long enough to reach the surface, while simultaneously not being so long that its internal volume exceeds your average tidal volume.

Rebreathing your expired CO2 is bad for your health. As is breathing water.

Posted by: Muldoon

Now do whole face snorkeling masks: there have been a bunch of people who died while using them for the same reason.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at May 12, 2024 03:36 PM (ACqXF)

186
Is this the same fire that was burning last year?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at May 12, 2024 03:26 PM

I don't think so. I've looked at the air quality map at Ventusky a couple of times this past winter and there was nothing to be seen in Canada.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at May 12, 2024 03:36 PM (RKVpM)

187 www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-

news/woman-dies-metal-straw-elena-struthers-

gardner-inquest-coroner-a8996431.html

Posted by: Justin Pinochet Castreau at May 12, 2024 03:37 PM (V8yYW)

188 The Tabs didn't all have bathrooms. There's one in easy driving distance that doesn't. I do have a shower tent and have no issues with getting a cassette toilet. I want something really simple to camp in.

One of the boat guys had a homemade teardrop and just took it everywhere. It just seems like an easy way to go.

Posted by: Notsothoreau at May 12, 2024 03:38 PM (yeEu9)

189 Ugh, speaking of reusable straws, who is the idiot that decided reusable water bottles should be designed with plastic straw - and will not work without that dang straw? (like this: https://tinyurl.com/ynn64ud3)
Someone who doesn't have kids, I'm guessing...

Posted by: Lizzy at May 12, 2024 03:38 PM (cCVOS)

190 When using bamboo as a snorkel to escape savages it is essential to ensure that the bamboo is long enough to reach the surface, while simultaneously not being so long that its internal volume exceeds your average tidal volume.
Posted by: Muldoon at May 12, 2024 03:28 PM

I only wish I'd known this sooner.

Posted by: zombie Ambrose J. Finnegan, Jr. at May 12, 2024 03:38 PM (a3Q+t)

191 Here’s a true first world problem….

“Death by Metal Straw Is a New Thing to Be Paranoid About”

www.thecut.com/2019/07/woman-dies-impaled-metal-straw.html

Posted by: Justin Pinochet Castreau at May 12, 2024 03:38 PM (V8yYW)

192 179 Whatever did we do before straws?
Posted by: Jak Sucio at May 12, 2024 03:34 PM (Aoykm
Bamboo. Or glass.

Posted by: Eromero at May 12, 2024 03:39 PM (NxC5+)

193 Last week I saw the solution: a cup with a built-in straw AND snack tray on top. It was beautiful. Forgot to ask the kid where he got it.

A Canadian friend had a FWP because of a TWP living next door. Here's a little report on it.

https://tinyurl.com/57m995dt

Posted by: NaughtyPine at May 12, 2024 03:39 PM (xD3od)

194 Yes, early T@bs had a no-bath option.

The 'shower-tent' bath/bathroom is a good plan for a tent or T@g camping.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at May 12, 2024 03:40 PM (ACqXF)

195 Binder clip! LOL

Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at May 12, 2024 03:40 PM (w6EFb)

196 I know Mexico and Central America burn off their fiefs at this time every year and it's been hazy for a week now. Jimi Hendrix would be proud.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at May 12, 2024 03:41 PM (Aoykm)

197 March 1, was the beginning of Canadian fire season.
This is not a new thing for them and if last year was as
dry as some parts of US then that area is a tinder box.

Posted by: Braenyard at May 12, 2024 03:41 PM (lCWOD)

198 What are ze showers of which you speak?

Posted by: The French at May 12, 2024 03:41 PM (a3Q+t)

199 Posted by: Eromero at May 12, 2024 03:39 PM (NxC5+)

You can't say " bottoms up" with a straw though.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at May 12, 2024 03:42 PM (Aoykm)

200 >>> Rebreathing your expired CO2 is bad for your health. As is breathing water.

Posted by: Muldoon

Now do whole face snorkeling masks: there have been a bunch of people who died while using them for the same reason.
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at May 12, 2024 03:36 PM (ACqXF)

I've read online something sciencey where amphibians like frogs can capture a store of oxygen rich air in their butts and use it over time, absorbing oxygen through their butthole skin to increase their time submerged. Could human divers use a similar technique to eek out a few more minutes? Only Science! knows.

Posted by: banana Dream at May 12, 2024 03:43 PM (Y6IkP)

201 What the hell is it with Canada and wildfires? I couldn't set the forest I live under on fire with anything short of a massive amount of accelerant. Even at that it would fizzle out after a quarter mile.
Posted by: Divide by Zero at May 12, 2024 03:21 PM

There were two in Michigan last year. Dry underbrush, wind, and lightning. My family managed to drive past before the highway was closed.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at May 12, 2024 03:43 PM (xD3od)

202 Could human divers use a similar technique to eek out a few more minutes? Only Science! knows.
Posted by: banana Dream

You'll have to ask the Secretary of Trans.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at May 12, 2024 03:44 PM (ACqXF)

203 165 I like to dicker

Look pal. It's 20 bucks. Same as in town. This is known.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at May 12, 2024 03:44 PM (Aoykm)

204 >>March 1, was the beginning of Canadian fire season.
This is not a new thing for them and if last year was as
dry as some parts of US then that area is a tinder box.

Many of the fires in Canada last year were arson.

Posted by: JackStraw at May 12, 2024 03:44 PM (LkLld)

205 I'd say the rivers and reeds thing would play into the straw debate.
Straws are as old as reeds so the answer to what we did before straws is..
Flung poo at those still licking dew off the leaves in the trees.

Posted by: Reforger at May 12, 2024 03:44 PM (B705c)

206 I took my tumbler with a plastic straw on the Tractor numerous times... until I went to take a drink, hit a rut and jammed the straw into the roof of my mouth.

Bloody mess. Hurt like hell. But healed up pretty quick.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at May 12, 2024 03:45 PM (Q4IgG)

207 >>> Someone who doesn't have kids, I'm guessing...
Posted by: Lizzy at May 12, 2024 03:38 PM (cCVOS)

Even if you don't lose them and wash them regularly the straw part seems to get nasty in no time.

Posted by: banana Dream at May 12, 2024 03:45 PM (Y6IkP)

208
You can't say " bottoms up" with a straw though.

I love that phrase. It means some good or service is soon going to be transported to a willing consumer.

Posted by: Pete Buttigieg at May 12, 2024 03:45 PM (RKVpM)

209 've read online something sciencey where amphibians like frogs can capture a store of oxygen rich air in their butts and use it over time, absorbing oxygen through their butthole skin to increase their time submerged.

Technically, those are cloacae, not 'butts' as butt is defined for mammals.

Posted by: Wesley Crusher at May 12, 2024 03:45 PM (a3Q+t)

210 I saw Frog Butthole Oxygen Experience do a cover version of "Tiny Bubbles" at a small club in Schenectady in aught seven.

What a gas, man!

Posted by: Muldoon at May 12, 2024 03:47 PM (991eG)

211 >>> Technically, those are cloacae, not 'butts' as butt is defined for mammals.
Posted by: Wesley Crusher at May 12, 2024 03:45 PM (a3Q+t)

A+ perfect use of sock.

Posted by: banana Dream at May 12, 2024 03:48 PM (Y6IkP)

212 Let’s make the weights of lead, shall we? Think of the cafeterias…of the children!

Posted by: Don Draper at May 12, 2024 03:48 PM (SpDH3)

213 I saw Frog Butthole Oxygen Experience do a cover version of "Tiny Bubbles" at a small club in Schenectady in aught seven.
----------
Guess there wasn't much else going on in Schenectady.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea, Radioactive Knight at May 12, 2024 03:48 PM (Be/+i)

214 Easy tiger. Only real men can use that phrase.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at May 12, 2024 03:49 PM (Aoykm)

215 Only Science! knows.

Posted by: banana Dream at May 12, 2024 03:43 PM (Y6IkP)

Here um this one goes in your mouth and this one goes in your butt... No, wait. Pull those out. This one goes in your mouth and this one goes in your butt.

Posted by: Reforger at May 12, 2024 03:49 PM (B705c)

216 Whatever did we do before straws?
Posted by: Jak Sucio at May 12, 2024 03:34 PM (Aoykm
Bamboo. Or glass.
Posted by: Eromero

Trachea from small animals.
We used to use the whole animal.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 12, 2024 03:51 PM (cOq4q)

217 215
Good one Reforger!

Posted by: Ciampino - Koala eats shoots and leaves!!! at May 12, 2024 03:51 PM (qfLjt)

218 I read an entire article about some bizarre phenomenon in the Keys that is causing fish to swim in circles and die.
It did not mention climate change one time.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at May 12, 2024 03:51 PM (P9xGM)

219 Strah????
Oh...you mean a Sissy Stick?
Don't want that frothed with sprinkles Kumquat Mimosa messing up your mustache???
Whaaaat? you say you don't even HAVE a Mustache???
I guess that explains...

a lot.

Posted by: birdog at May 12, 2024 03:52 PM (+Fkyb)

220 Is this the butt thread?

Posted by: Hope's Rolo at May 12, 2024 03:53 PM (mH6SG)

221 "Happy Mother's Day. At the Biden campaign, we are asking Americans to do the moms in their lives a favor. Stop Trump," the Biden campaign wrote in a press release.

In the video, the Biden campaign claims that "On Mother’s Day, a reminder: Donald Trump stands only for himself – and not mothers across America and their families."

tinyurl.com/5y4dczvz

Posted by: redridinghood at May 12, 2024 03:55 PM (NpAcC)

222 Whaaaat? you say you don't even HAVE a Mustache???
I guess that explains...

a lot.
Posted by: birdog at May 12, 2024 03:52 PM (+Fkyb)
----------
What if this guy shaves with a straight razor? Does that cancel out?

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea, Radioactive Knight at May 12, 2024 03:55 PM (Be/+i)

223 That floating straw problem.
I know!
Buy a soda in a can, keep the can, wash it and pour your bottled fizzy stuff into it. Now you can use the keep-straw-down tab built-in the can. No more nasty glasses.

Posted by: Ciampino - Koala eats, shoots and leaves!!! at May 12, 2024 03:56 PM (qfLjt)

224 Technically, those are cloacae, not 'butts' as butt is defined for mammals.
Posted by: Wesley Crusher

Now do "head butt" Wesley.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 12, 2024 03:56 PM (cOq4q)

225 216 Whatever did we do before straws?
Posted by: Jak Sucio at May 12, 2024 03:34 PM (Aoykm
Bamboo. Or glass.
Posted by: Eromero

Trachea from small animals.
We used to use the whole animal.
Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at May 12, 2024 03:51 PM (cOq4q)
Did they get the idea for curly straws from pig f---ers?

Posted by: Eromero at May 12, 2024 03:56 PM (NxC5+)

226 Going to go have dinner with my parents in a bit, that will be nice

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 03:57 PM (fwDg9)

227 Nothing says Mother's Day than full term abortion

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 03:58 PM (fwDg9)

228 In the video, the Biden campaign claims that "On Mother’s Day, a reminder: Donald Trump stands only for himself – and not mothers across America and their families."

Say the guy who showers with his granddaughter (or is it his niece)....fuck that guy in particular.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at May 12, 2024 03:59 PM (YRsIm)

229 222
Is there a curved razor for shaving?

Posted by: Ciampino - Koala eats, shoots, and leaves!!! at May 12, 2024 03:59 PM (qfLjt)

230 Pretty sure there is evidence of straw mining in ancient Mesopotamia.

Posted by: Reforger at May 12, 2024 04:00 PM (B705c)

231 FOODIE NOODIE TIME

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 04:01 PM (fwDg9)

232 Any number of plant and animal hollow viscera could be used to transport liquid and semisolid foodstuffs from one place to another for human consumption.

Tracheae, cloacae, small intestines, large intestines, Fallopian tubes, femurs, Eustachian tubes, tear ducts, lacrimal ducts, salivary ducts, aortae, venae cava. The list is seemingly endless.

And that's just fauna. Don't even get me started on flora.

Posted by: Muldoon at May 12, 2024 04:01 PM (991eG)

233 I knew a guy that refused to use straws, mean german hillbilly who hated the very idea of straws. He'd curse them and always hit you with the line, "first and last thing I ever sucked was my momma's tit".

Just bringing things back to Mother's day for everyone.

Posted by: banana Dream at May 12, 2024 04:02 PM (Y6IkP)

234 227 Nothing says Mother's Day than full term abortion

Posted by: Skip at May 12, 2024 03:58 PM (fwDg9)
----
See, now if your had aborted you then who would you lunch with? Eh!

(Have a great time with your Mum, Skip)

Posted by: Ciampino - Koala eats, shoots, and leaves!! at May 12, 2024 04:03 PM (qfLjt)

235 Taking a cue from above searched 'shower-tent' at YouGuessedIt.
Several were illustrated with an image of an attractive female. The odd thing was the disproportionately large...hands. Scary hands, some of them. They're probably using CGI.

Posted by: Braenyard at May 12, 2024 04:07 PM (lCWOD)

236 Let’s make the weights of lead, shall we? Think of the cafeterias…of the children!

Posted by: Don Draper at May 12, 2024 03:48 PM (SpDH3)

No - a ring of silver shot to slip over the bottom!

Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at May 12, 2024 04:08 PM (w6EFb)

237 "Massive wildfires in Alberta. I hope it's not a problem for AOP. Is Canada a first world country anyway?"
The fires up there...100% Natural, no human involvement of any kind.
They never went out over the winter, even with record snows they smoulder under the snow and Ice until they can catch back up in the spring.
Same in Siberia, Manchuria, the MOST remote, roadless, and unpopulated regions of the planet, not even any navigable waterways to get there.
But look at Mexico, central America and central Africa...hell nearly 1/2 of Madagascar is burning.

https://firms.modaps.eosdis.nasa.gov/map/

Posted by: birdog at May 12, 2024 04:08 PM (+Fkyb)

238 birdog, If he could get to that wood a fella sure could make a profit.

Posted by: Braenyard at May 12, 2024 04:14 PM (lCWOD)

239 Second thoughts, all of these de-carbonizationists should be focusing on all these wildfires across the world. That would lower the carbon footprint significantly.

Posted by: Braenyard at May 12, 2024 04:18 PM (lCWOD)

240 I was shocked to discover that clerks in convenience stores which sell ice, don't even know where the ice comes from.

Isn't there a law about this? Isn't ice supposed to be responsibly sourced?

Not one of those clerks could answer basic questions about refrigeration technology. It's as though the whole ice industry is corrupt.

Posted by: Tom Perry at May 12, 2024 04:27 PM (MX0bI)

241 The pop tab on a can of soda holds the straw from coming out.

Posted by: Kenneth King Neil at May 12, 2024 04:45 PM (/g9JB)

242 Stainless Steel Straw. Easy to sterilize. Especially helpful if your name is John Wick. Or epador.

Posted by: epador at May 12, 2024 05:24 PM (seACy)

243 "birdog, If he could get to that wood a fella sure could make a profit"
Getting TO the wood is not where the profit lies...it is getting the wood TO the buyers.

Helos drones and blimps...young man, Helos drones and blimps.

If delivered downwind somewhere...even more Eco....nomical.
Even just being able to drop it into one of the great lakes, or any body of water where mechanized transport can be accessed

Posted by: birdog at May 12, 2024 05:44 PM (+Fkyb)

244 The people who buy into the turtle/plastic straw claims dance like certain denizens of Kansas City.

Posted by: Erebus- ex-killer whale at May 12, 2024 06:04 PM (Yvjtq)

245 Jerry Seinfeld’s Commencement Address Sparks Walkout by Antisemites at Duke University.

Do you think Jerry Seinfeld might be up for a tour of Ivy League schools ?

Seinfeld could become as mythic as St Patrick who drove the snakes out of Ireland

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