First-World Problems...

20 years of large SUVs thumping down from the garage floor to the black top of the driveway! It wasn't much of a drop at first, but of course over the years the black top has compressed, which increased the drop which increased the force which increased the drop....

The worst part is that those depressions collect water, which delightfully freezes and I have a tiny little skating rink unless I am diligent about getting rid of water and snow during the winter.

A small part of me wants a concrete apron. A smaller part of me wants a concrete apron with heating elements embedded.

The stress is nearly intolerable!

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Howdy, CBD !

Posted by: Duke Lowell at August 27, 2023 02:00 PM (u73oe)

2 You need young labor

Posted by: Skip at August 27, 2023 02:00 PM (MOY79)

3 It's caused by climate change!

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 27, 2023 02:02 PM (K+1Pw)

4 Time to sell.

Posted by: Always the default answer at August 27, 2023 02:02 PM (NBVIP)

5 Try top coating seal, might keep water

Posted by: Skip at August 27, 2023 02:02 PM (MOY79)

6 Go to Lowe’s and get a couple of bags of asphalt repair. Fill it in and tamp it down. Voila, all better.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at August 27, 2023 02:02 PM (u73oe)

7 Fetched the others.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 27, 2023 02:02 PM (K+1Pw)

8 There are some guys in town who had a partial load of blacktop that they had left over from another job, it's all paid for, I bet they could do a nice patch for you for just the cost of labor and a bit extra!

Posted by: Kindltot at August 27, 2023 02:03 PM (xhaym)

9 It's caused by climate change!
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 27, 2023 02:02 PM (K+1Pw)

Ahem.

Posted by: Climate Chaos at August 27, 2023 02:05 PM (aD39U)

10 Chuck some gravel there.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 27, 2023 02:05 PM (Q4IgG)

11 This is a good thing - keeps out wind driven rain.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at August 27, 2023 02:06 PM (ga8qR)

12 Why in the world wasn't the driveway matched to the garage floor level or at least have a 1/4 inch lip for drainage?

Posted by: Beartooth at August 27, 2023 02:06 PM (azYCi)

13 My first house in Colorado, I think I shoveled the driveway/sidewalk exactly twice. I hated the lip from the street to the driveway, but it was designed that way.

I do not understand why this is a thing. It's worse in some parts here in Arizona, with it being impossible not to scrape the front of the car when going from parking lot to street.

Obviously these things were designed for big honkin' SUVs and pickups. Assuming the world doesn't fall apart between now and then, I'll replace my little sedan with a pickup, so it won't be a problem for me anymore.

Posted by: BurtTC at August 27, 2023 02:07 PM (N5ek4)

14 I think the WEF has some ideas on how to eliminate all first-world problems for us.

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:07 PM (F5SKq)

15 Ahem.
Posted by: Climate Chaos

You're not that impressive.
~Ian Fleming

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 27, 2023 02:08 PM (K+1Pw)

16 Go to Lowe’s and get a couple of bags of asphalt repair. Fill it in and tamp it down. Voila, all better.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at August 27, 2023 02:02 PM (u73oe)

That sounds suspiciously like work...and the purchase of new tools!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 02:08 PM (lQONO)

17 and the purchase of new tools!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

Think of them as cooking utensils and you'll do fine.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 27, 2023 02:09 PM (K+1Pw)

18 @12 could the first 3-4 feet of asphalt in front of the garage be replaced with reinforced concrete?

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:09 PM (F5SKq)

19 Why in the world wasn't the driveway matched to the garage floor level or at least have a 1/4 inch lip for drainage?

Posted by: Beartooth at August 27, 2023 02:06 PM (azYCi)

It was...at first. But there is an additional issue, and that is that there is red rock underneath part of the house and part of the rest of the property, and that sh*t is just terrible for foundations for anything.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 02:10 PM (lQONO)

20 I agree with Beartooth, get patch blacktop a fraction of inch from concrete and taper it out a couple feet.

Posted by: Skip at August 27, 2023 02:10 PM (MOY79)

21 Everything is heading for the river.
That'll be sixty MILLION dollars.

Posted by: Hokey Pokey at August 27, 2023 02:10 PM (glGDV)

22 could the first 3-4 feet of asphalt in front of the garage be replaced with reinforced concrete?

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:09 PM (F5SKq)

Sort of like what I suggested in the last part of the post?

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 02:11 PM (lQONO)

23 That sounds suspiciously like work...and the purchase of new tools!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 02:08 PM (lQONO)

—————-

Grab a couple illegals from the parking lot to do it for you. Cash only, amigo.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at August 27, 2023 02:11 PM (u73oe)

24 18 @12 could the first 3-4 feet of asphalt in front of the garage be replaced with reinforced concrete?
Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:09 PM (F5SKq)
---
and add a metal grate for drainage.

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:11 PM (F5SKq)

25 there is red rock underneath part of the house and part of the rest of the property, and sh*t is just terrible for foundations for anything.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

Maybe it is time to move to a red State after all.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 27, 2023 02:11 PM (K+1Pw)

26 Just drive over the patch a few times, create a new depression, refill and driver over it again.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at August 27, 2023 02:11 PM (Angsy)

27 @22 I didn't know that was called an "apron".. first-world lingo I guess.

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:12 PM (F5SKq)

28 The glowball warming will eliminate freezing.

Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at August 27, 2023 02:13 PM (Mzdiz)

29 My FWP today is the weather won't be in the triple digits, and so the AC is working optimally. This condition leads to the tiny pups in my lap to keep everyone warm and I can't disturb them to get to the olives and coppa.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 27, 2023 02:13 PM (YRsIm)

30 I think CBD should replace the driveway with pavers. Perhaps the ones that have hollow centers that grass can grow through.

Posted by: Beartooth at August 27, 2023 02:14 PM (azYCi)

31 So, what you're saying is that your "curtains don't match your drapes" here.

Got it. Get help.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 27, 2023 02:14 PM (Q4IgG)

32 My driveway is gravel. I wish I had your first world problems. I must be living in the Stone Age compared to you.

Posted by: 4thewin at August 27, 2023 02:14 PM (AWzld)

33 30 I think CBD should replace the driveway with pavers. Perhaps the ones that have hollow centers that grass can grow through.
Posted by: Beartooth at August 27, 2023 02:14 PM (azYCi)
----
and small shrubs!

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:14 PM (F5SKq)

34 The glowball warming will eliminate freezing.
Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at August 27, 2023 02:13 PM (Mzdiz)

Which would be a disaster, what with all the fresh fruit and veggies that could be grown year round in wide swaths of continental U.S.

Posted by: BurtTC at August 27, 2023 02:14 PM (N5ek4)

35 Maybe it is time to move to a red State after all.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 27, 2023 02:11 PM (K+1Pw)

The obvious solution. It rarely freezes for any length of time down here in SC. We just have gravel, not paying for a paved drive maybe 700 feet long.

Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at August 27, 2023 02:14 PM (Mzdiz)

36 Which would be a disaster, what with all the fresh fruit and veggies that could be grown year round in wide swaths of continental U.S.

Posted by: BurtTC at August 27, 2023 02:14 PM (N5ek4)

I know, right? All of that fresh non-processed food.

Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at August 27, 2023 02:15 PM (Mzdiz)

37 and add a metal grate for drainage.
Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:11 PM (F5SKq)

Actually, putting in a drainage channel there instead, and bridging it with a grate or a perforated plate would be a good solution, it would even out the drop, give drainage for the entry of the garage, and solve the problem of needing to somehow fix the eternally re-spawning pot-hole problem.

Posted by: Kindltot at August 27, 2023 02:16 PM (xhaym)

38 Stop parking in the garage. You're just taking up workshop space.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 27, 2023 02:16 PM (YRsIm)

39 I haz gravel.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 27, 2023 02:17 PM (mBgPb)

40 I think CBD should replace the driveway with pavers. Perhaps the ones that have hollow centers that grass can grow through.

Posted by: Beartooth at August 27, 2023 02:14 PM (azYCi)

We don't tolerate hillbilly solutions here.

Posted by: CBD's HOA at August 27, 2023 02:18 PM (Mzdiz)

41 > My driveway is gravel. I wish I had your first world problems. I must be living in the Stone Age compared to you.
_____________

Mine too. 1/4 mile to the road/mailbox/trash bin.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 27, 2023 02:18 PM (Q4IgG)

42 My driveway is gravel. I wish I had your first world problems. I must be living in the Stone Age compared to you.
Posted by: 4thewin at August 27, 2023 02:14 PM (AWzld)

I love gravel driveways, they give more drainage options and leaking oil gets caught and digested by bacteria right there instead of being run off to pollute a storm drain

Posted by: Kindltot at August 27, 2023 02:18 PM (xhaym)

43 Stop parking in the garage. You're just taking up workshop space.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 27, 2023 02:16 PM (YRsIm)

This!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 02:19 PM (lQONO)

44 Sure, dig it up and concrete away
But your back to my first suggestion

Posted by: Skip at August 27, 2023 02:20 PM (MOY79)

45 Stop parking in the garage. You're just taking up workshop space.
Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 27, 2023 02:16 PM (YRsIm)

If one lives in a snowy region, nothing divides people more than those driving to work in the morning, with their hoods and roofs clean, versus those with snow cleared enough to see the road.

Posted by: BurtTC at August 27, 2023 02:20 PM (N5ek4)

46 My driveway is a mess. One section near the sidewalk has a depression about 6 feet in diameter and about 8 inches deep. Previous owner parked his semi truck cab there and then vehicle weight caused the depression.

The other issue is the same owner accidentally dropped a 70 foot spruce across the front lawn and middle of the driveway cause some cracks which I have to seal every few years.

Posted by: Beartooth at August 27, 2023 02:20 PM (azYCi)

47 I love gravel driveways, they give more drainage options...

Posted by: Kindltot at August 27, 2023 02:18 PM (xhaym)

There are large grates that can be installed over grass that will support cars, but can be mowed over. I think that is the ideal solution.

I saw them at the military cemetery at Omaha Beach. They looked great!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 02:20 PM (lQONO)

48
Last day stewarding for the Toy Dog club. I'm convinced most dogs are smarter than their handlers. I can announce in my deep, booming voice that we'll be having Best Puppy competition after Best of Breed and if you win a puppy class to please wait until then. Comes the time and they've all wandered off.

Got finished and fled before I could be asked to handle the groups. No point waiting two hours to take care ofioi something any idiot can do.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 27, 2023 02:21 PM (MoZTd)

49 When England was the whore of the world
Margaret was her madam
And the future looked as bright and as clear as
The black tarmacadam…

Posted by: Elvis Costello, Leftist Running Dog at August 27, 2023 02:23 PM (R/m4+)

50 large stones with gravel compacted between the rocks...will last for 2 thousand years...

Posted by: runner at August 27, 2023 02:23 PM (V13WU)

51 A Neil Armstrong quote comes to mind.

Posted by: Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, at August 27, 2023 02:24 PM (adINt)

52 A small part of me wants a concrete apron. A smaller part of me wants a concrete apron with heating elements embedded.

u kids and ur euphemisms

Posted by: REDACTED at August 27, 2023 02:25 PM (us2H3)

53 Had a gravel driveway once. Hated it.

Posted by: Notorious BFD at August 27, 2023 02:25 PM (Xrfse)

54 Posted by: BurtTC at August 27, 2023 02:20 PM (N5ek4)

We lived in Brighton for the last 7 years. I completely understand.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 27, 2023 02:25 PM (YRsIm)

55 We have little streams flowing down our driveway. We'll probably be dumping gravel and smoothing it for the next few years until we figure that out.

The water drains from the other side of the road. That guy gets a pond in his yard every time there's a substantial rain.

Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at August 27, 2023 02:26 PM (Mzdiz)

56 Get a propane powered weed burner. They do a good job of melting and evaporating frozen water in small areas. Save you the hassle of cutting and pouring new concrete, and then paying for the unreliable power to keep it warm so it melts the ice. Better hurry or Bidumb will ban them also.

Posted by: StephanA at August 27, 2023 02:26 PM (Pd4Md)

57 When England was the whore of the world
Margaret was her madam
And the future looked as bright and as clear as
The black tarmacadam…
Posted by: Elvis Costello, Leftist Running Dog at August 27, 2023 02:23 PM (R/m4+)

Nothing pleased me more, than with the release of Spike, I could hate Elvis Costello, and not ever have to pay any attention to him ever again.

Posted by: BurtTC at August 27, 2023 02:26 PM (N5ek4)

58
I tried an apron on my garage

Posted by: Nina Hartley at August 27, 2023 02:27 PM (us2H3)

59 Move to Florida, problem solved.

Posted by: Montec at August 27, 2023 02:27 PM (nQppb)

60 It's obvious the only solution is to burn the whole house down and start from scratch.

Posted by: nurse ratched, otter 841 superfan at August 27, 2023 02:27 PM (U2p+3)

61 Got finished and fled before I could be asked to handle the groups.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

Glad to hear you escaped relatively unscathed.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 27, 2023 02:28 PM (K+1Pw)

62 59 Move to Florida, problem solved.
Posted by: Montec at August 27, 2023 02:27 PM (nQppb)
-----

I would think all the middle-class-affordable homes have been snapped up by now.

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:29 PM (F5SKq)

63 Get a propane powered weed burner. They do a good job of melting and evaporating frozen water in small areas. Save you the hassle of cutting and pouring new concrete, and then paying for the unreliable power to keep it warm so it melts the ice. Better hurry or Bidumb will ban them also.
Posted by: StephanA at August 27, 2023 02:26 PM (Pd4Md)

The bastards will just tax the Hell out of propane. Twenty bucks to fill the cylinder, plus eighty bucks for the carbon credits to be allowed to burn it.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 27, 2023 02:29 PM (mBgPb)

64 Ignore the depression and when water freezes there in the winter, wear spiked golf shoes.

Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at August 27, 2023 02:30 PM (BdMk6)

65
Glad to hear you escaped relatively unscathed.
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 27, 2023 02:28 PM (K+1Pw)

___________

Also to thaw out. It's 100+ degrees outside and the ballroom might just as well have been a refrigerator.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 27, 2023 02:31 PM (MoZTd)

66 your problem is that the asphalt substrate was poor and improperly compacted

should have french drain underneath the joint

Posted by: REDACTED at August 27, 2023 02:31 PM (us2H3)

67 @63 I guess we will need to start making our own natural gas *spit*

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:31 PM (F5SKq)

68 My driveway and garage is in the alley behind the house. The driveway looks like shit and falling apart. But it’s out of sight, out of mind. We only put the cars in the garage in winter. And then awd and snow tires so unless it’s more than 7,8 inches of snow, we don’t even bother plowing.

Posted by: Montec at August 27, 2023 02:32 PM (nQppb)

69 >>> 67 @63 I guess we will need to start making our own natural gas *spit*
Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:31 PM (F5SKq)

You misspelled propane.

Posted by: Hank Hill at August 27, 2023 02:33 PM (llON8)

70 We have little streams flowing down our driveway. We'll probably be dumping gravel and smoothing it for the next few years until we figure that out.

The water drains from the other side of the road. That guy gets a pond in his yard every time there's a substantial rain.
Posted by: Miley

The property above ours had a drain that clogged so all the water spread out over his yard and then into our yard and driveway. Scoured about 6 inches of soil from the yard and then took even more from the dirt and pea gravel driveway.
We bought and spread 120yards of 3/8ths minus decomposed granite to get fix the problem and improve the drive.
(there are 2 3ft culverts under the driveway from 2 different ditches that are supposed to handle the storm runoff. Oh, and the county prohibits redirecting the runoff ditches.)

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 27, 2023 02:34 PM (K+1Pw)

71 67 @63 I guess we will need to start making our own natural gas *spit*
Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:31 PM (F5SKq)

I am knowing of where one may get much natural gas, comrade.

But how are we of getting it there, that is problem.

Posted by: V Pootin at August 27, 2023 02:34 PM (N5ek4)

72 Miley, if you can, get the road humped up in the middle and put in shallow, broad ditches on the side to help run-off. It is a pain to do but it is worth it. Shallow and broad ditches can be mowed.

Posted by: Kindltot at August 27, 2023 02:34 PM (xhaym)

73 If properly designed and installed, a paved drive can function as a giant drain path

I have an 800 ft paved drive and it drains like whore's bank account

Posted by: REDACTED at August 27, 2023 02:34 PM (us2H3)

74 We have a concrete driveway on a slope that's slowly breaking apart. We'll need to repour it in a few years. I have looked at those pavers that interlock and allow grass to grow in them. I am seriously considering them.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 27, 2023 02:35 PM (YRsIm)

75 We have a concrete driveway on a slope that's slowly breaking apart. We'll need to repour it in a few years. I have looked at those pavers that interlock and allow grass to grow in them. I am seriously considering them.
Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 27, 2023 02:35 PM (YRsIm)

Marston mat.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 27, 2023 02:38 PM (mBgPb)

76 @75 for parking aircraft?

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:40 PM (F5SKq)

77 The builder had to excavate to install the garage frost wall and footing. Ideally they used good fill, properly compacted, inside the garage below the slab. Undoubtedly they just filled against the outside of the frost wall with whatever soil they dug out of the excavation and no compaction. It is likely not the asphalt compressing but rather the uncompacted backfill settling. Apron slab is a good idea but you'll need to insist they dig out soil and replace with structural fill properly compacted. May also want to consider pinning the apron slab to the frost wall with steel dowels. Depending on your soil conditions you may just move the problem to the edge of the apron slab so be warned.

With the cancer raging inside me that I'm afraid will be the sum total of my consulting work this month.

Posted by: moon_over_vermont at August 27, 2023 02:40 PM (xt1W3)

78 Kindltot, Publius has been mulling over that issue. He just doesn't want to spend a lot of money. It's more of a cosmetic problem than a functional one.

Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at August 27, 2023 02:40 PM (Mzdiz)

79 Yeah, Marston Mat. The house is atop a bill so if I could camo the driveway so it looked like a continuous lawn from the street, that'd be nice.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 27, 2023 02:41 PM (YRsIm)

80 Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 27, 2023 02:35 PM (YRsIm)

Marston mat.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon

Good idea. Hey Jarhead, got any Seabee friends that install it?

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at August 27, 2023 02:41 PM (K+1Pw)

81 If you intend to stay in that house for some time adding heating elements might be worth it. Heck if you can afford it do the entire driveway. Shoveling snow might be a thing of the past.

And no, not because of "Climate Change", but a flip of the switch might save your back. :-)

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 02:42 PM (fe7in)

82 There's a house out in the sticks around here, on a hill with a steep driveway. A year or two I noticed there was no ice or snow on it during a snowstorm.

It's heated.

On closer inspection I could see the etchings where the elements were strung. I presume low voltage. Probably only has to warm to 33-35F.

Gravel has the advantage of providing traction. Only several inches of ice will keep me from getting any grip. At that point leaving the house is a questionable endeavor.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 27, 2023 02:43 PM (Q4IgG)

83 Flexible asphalt crack filler and then (full) driveway spray sealant. (IDK, might extend the life of the driveway by at least a handful of years.)

Posted by: L - Practice makes perfect. They know their enemy. at August 27, 2023 02:44 PM (GshMh)

84 58
I tried an apron on my garage
Posted by: Nina Hartley at August 27, 2023 02:27 PM (us2H3)

Was that the time you lubed your rear end.

Posted by: Roy at August 27, 2023 02:45 PM (rqgpJ)

85 More like geo textile. Marston mat is what we had in the desert. I think NDS makes the former.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 27, 2023 02:47 PM (YRsIm)

86 84 58
I tried an apron on my garage
Posted by: Nina Hartley at August 27, 2023 02:27 PM (us2H3)

Was that the time you lubed your rear end.
Posted by: Roy at August 27, 2023 02:45 PM (rqgpJ)
----
2 car garage

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:47 PM (F5SKq)

87 With the cancer raging inside me that I'm afraid will be the sum total of my consulting work this month.

Oh, man. Prayers up for you.

Posted by: Notorious BFD at August 27, 2023 02:48 PM (Xrfse)

88 What you want is concrete galoshes!

Posted by: Scotty at August 27, 2023 02:49 PM (KAi1n)

89 38 Stop parking in the garage. You're just taking up workshop space.
Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at August 27, 2023 02:16 PM (YRsIm)

Or model railroad layout space.

Posted by: Fox2! at August 27, 2023 02:49 PM (Tm48r)

90 When CBD says "SUV" he means "Escalade"

Posted by: San Franpsycho at August 27, 2023 02:54 PM (RIvkX)

91 All heat trace cable in your concrete will do is make your concrete spall. Before the cables break because of the combination of expansion and contraction of your slab, plus exposure to concrete.

I'd urge you to not do it. But do what you want to do.

Posted by: Listen at August 27, 2023 02:54 PM (5TEj8)

92 Roman concrete never compessed.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at August 27, 2023 02:55 PM (bQKgA)

93 20 years of large SUVs thumping down from the garage floor.

Plural. That's a shame.

Fox News, Mar. '23 - Electric cargo bike aims to replace your SUV

Posted by: L - Practice makes perfect. They know their enemy. at August 27, 2023 02:57 PM (GshMh)

94 90 When CBD says "SUV" he means "Escalade"
Posted by: San Franpsycho at August 27, 2023 02:54 PM (RIvkX)

-----------

Pfft. All the cool kids are driving Levantes or Bentaygas.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at August 27, 2023 02:57 PM (bQKgA)

95 I tried an apron on my garage
Posted by: Nina Hartley at August 27, 2023 02:27 PM (us2H3)

Was that the time you lubed your rear end.
Posted by: Roy at August 27,

I got the reference.

Posted by: That Northernlurker what lurkd at August 27, 2023 02:58 PM (VdGjU)

96 My driveway is an 8 foot length of sidewalk.

You commence with the poop jokes.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at August 27, 2023 02:59 PM (RIvkX)

97 My driveway slopes to the northeast, so in winter the bottom gets no sun. Any snow plowed on the bottom from road crews must be moved or wait until April.
Thankfully last year no snow, and in my lifetime have neve rd saw that even in England and Virginia.
I do now have a snowblower so I am in better shape this coming winter.

Posted by: Skip at August 27, 2023 03:01 PM (MOY79)

98 Thankfully last year no snow, and in my lifetime have neve rd saw that even in England and Virginia.

----------

Global Warming has entered the chat.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at August 27, 2023 03:03 PM (bQKgA)

99 Oooh, look at mr fancy pants with his paved driveway!

Posted by: Weasel at August 27, 2023 03:04 PM (RG6z4)

100 Pfft. All the cool kids are driving Levantes or Bentaygas.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at August 27, 2023 02:57 PM (bQKgA)
====
I'm too cool to even know what those are.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at August 27, 2023 03:06 PM (RIvkX)

101 I see an outline of a dog in the asphalt. It's a psychological test!

Posted by: m at August 27, 2023 03:06 PM (30MvH)

102 My driveway appears as a road on some GPS systems. From the road you cannot see my house at the foot of my driveway, even in winter.

Once, several years ago, some fool came barreling up the driveway doing about 40MPH only to realize there's a house at the end of this "road."

Did a slide job in the front yard to turn around.

Punks.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 27, 2023 03:07 PM (Q4IgG)

103 2 car garage
Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:47 PM (F5SKq)

Two in the garage, two more on the driveway.

Posted by: V Pootin at August 27, 2023 03:07 PM (xTzp3)

104 11 This is a good thing - keeps out wind driven rain.
Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at August 27, 2023 02:06 PM (ga8qR)

True!

Posted by: m at August 27, 2023 03:08 PM (30MvH)

105 My first world problem is looking at train schedules for next months trip to Europe. Home ---> Paris ---> Caen ---> Paris --->Eindhoven --->Tilburg --->Eindhoven --->Amsterdam --->Home.

Let's hope I do not lose my phone to a pickpocket the last time I was there.

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 03:10 PM (fe7in)

106 Here's a first world problem - going through TSA with an overly large penis. https://tinyurl.com/4dcc6rbj

Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at August 27, 2023 03:11 PM (Mzdiz)

107 Hard to believe I am the first to say: slap hot iron to it.

Posted by: m at August 27, 2023 03:12 PM (30MvH)

108 hiya

Posted by: JT at August 27, 2023 03:12 PM (T4tVD)

109 Go away, leader of the free world.

Posted by: BurtTC at August 27, 2023 03:12 PM (xTzp3)

110 Joe the Plumber is mort

pancreatic cancer

Posted by: Mark1971 at August 27, 2023 03:13 PM (xPl2J)

111 The stress is nearly intolerable!

-------
And yet you soldier on. You're an inspiration to us all!

Thanks for the FWP thread, CBD.

Posted by: 496 at August 27, 2023 03:13 PM (szbbg)

112 Scuba Dude have fun, brush up on your Arabic, could save your life.

Posted by: Skip at August 27, 2023 03:13 PM (MOY79)

113 Joe the Plumber is mort

pancreatic cancer
Posted by: Mark1971 at August 27, 2023 03:13 PM (xPl2J)

In some ways a proto-J6 martyr. RIP.

Posted by: BurtTC at August 27, 2023 03:14 PM (xTzp3)

114 You need a backhoe and a dumptruck.

Posted by: Eromero at August 27, 2023 03:16 PM (NxC5+)

115 37 and add a metal grate for drainage.
Posted by: Chairman LMAO at August 27, 2023 02:11 PM (F5SKq)

Actually, putting in a drainage channel there instead, and bridging it with a grate or a perforated plate would be a good solution, it would even out the drop, give drainage for the entry of the garage, and solve the problem of needing to somehow fix the eternally re-spawning pot-hole problem.
Posted by: Kindltot at August 27, 2023 02:16 PM (xhaym)

A hospital entrance near me has a setup like that, and sometimes every car that rolls over it goes KLA-DUNK! KLA-DUNK! (front tires; back tires). Then it stops-I dunno; somebody tightens up some screws? the weather changes? and it's quiet for a while.

Posted by: m at August 27, 2023 03:20 PM (30MvH)

116 Moon_over_vermont - I was sorry to read your prayer request... you have certainly been in a lot of prayers. I hope you're doing ok. Hang in there.

Posted by: 496 at August 27, 2023 03:20 PM (szbbg)

117 111 Joe the Plumber is mort

pancreatic cancer
Posted by: Mark1971 at August 27, 2023 03:13 PM (xPl2J)

////

The media tried their best to do him in.

Posted by: JM in Fla/Ill - Behold the Manchurian Candidate at August 27, 2023 03:21 PM (wUiWo)

118 Scuba Dude-

Safe travels !

Posted by: JT at August 27, 2023 03:22 PM (T4tVD)

119 A two-by-four. Top side planed at an oblique angle. Superglue it to the surface. Done.

Posted by: m at August 27, 2023 03:25 PM (30MvH)

120 I am watching yesterday's Navy game and it is not interesting. ND is kicking Navy's ass.

You guys could have warned me to watch South Carolina State vs Jackson State instead.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 27, 2023 03:25 PM (aD39U)

121 Joe the Plumber is mort

pancreatic cancer
Posted by: Mark1971 at August 27, 2023 03:13 PM (xPl2J)

////

And he was jus 49. Pancreatic cancer is a tough way to go. RIP

Posted by: JM in Fla/Ill - Behold the Manchurian Candidate at August 27, 2023 03:25 PM (wUiWo)

122 And he was jus 49. Pancreatic cancer is a tough way to go. RIP
Posted by: JM in Fla/Ill - Behold the Manchurian Candidate at August 27, 2023 03:25 PM (wUiWo)

It's quick though.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 27, 2023 03:26 PM (aD39U)

123 I would think a decent concrete ramp maybe a foot long with a drainage channel embedded in the foot...

Posted by: JEM at August 27, 2023 03:26 PM (8erNz)

124 you should just move

Posted by: lurks at August 27, 2023 03:26 PM (wrYdi)

125 you should just move

Posted by: lurks at August 27, 2023 03:26 PM (wrYdi)

Or dust off and nuke it from orbit...

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 03:28 PM (lQONO)

126 Or dust off and nuke it from orbit...
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 03:28 PM (lQONO)

We got seven canisters of CN-20. I say we roll them in there and nerve gas the whole fucking nest.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 27, 2023 03:29 PM (aD39U)

127 107 Here's a first world problem - going through TSA with an overly large penis. https://tinyurl.com/4dcc6rbj
Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at August 27, 2023 03:11 PM (Mzdiz)

///

So, that's why they stopped me last time I flew. The X-Ray machine literally had a red dot right THERE. Not kidding. Another reason I detest flying -- and I'm a private pilot.

Posted by: JM in Fla/Ill - Behold the Manchurian Candidate at August 27, 2023 03:29 PM (wUiWo)

128 Here's a first world problem - going through TSA with an overly large penis. https://tinyurl.com/4dcc6rbj
Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at August 27, 2023 03:11 PM (Mzdiz)

///

So, that's why they stopped me last time I flew. The X-Ray machine literally had a red dot right THERE. Not kidding. Another reason I detest flying -- and I'm a private pilot.
Posted by: JM in Fla/Ill - Behold the Manchurian Candidate at August 27, 2023 03:29 PM (wUiWo)

Should we call you Two Gun?

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 27, 2023 03:30 PM (aD39U)

129 Two gun?

Nope. Old and shriveled.

Posted by: JM in Fla/Ill - Behold the Manchurian Candidate at August 27, 2023 03:31 PM (wUiWo)

130 And yet you soldier on. You're an inspiration to us all!

Posted by: 496 at August 27, 2023 03:13 PM (szbbg)

Sometimes I wonder why, but then I realize that I am an inspiration to spoiled people everywhere.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 03:31 PM (lQONO)

131 Just buy your servants some new sandals so when they carry your litter there's no risk of slipping on the golden causeway.

Chop, chop!

Posted by: Dr. Bone at August 27, 2023 03:33 PM (KVGVf)

132 Do the cheapest driveway fix possible, save cash to install Acorn Stairlift.

Posted by: Doctrine of Inevitable Decline at August 27, 2023 03:34 PM (83IzV)

133 87 With the cancer raging inside me that I'm afraid will be the sum total of my consulting work this month.

///

Adding my prayers. May G-d be with you.

Posted by: JM in Fla/Ill - Behold the Manchurian Candidate at August 27, 2023 03:35 PM (wUiWo)

134 Caulking. Lots and lots of caulking.

Posted by: m at August 27, 2023 03:37 PM (30MvH)

135 Hmmmm, do I shell out the extra $917 to upgrade from Economy Plus to Business Class on my flight to Paris?

Naah, maybe another time.

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 03:37 PM (fe7in)

136 Hmmmm, do I shell out the extra $917 to upgrade from Economy Plus to Business Class on my flight to Paris?

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 03:37 PM (fe7in)

What airline?

Economy Plus can be quite good.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 03:39 PM (lQONO)

137 Hmmmm, do I shell out the extra $917 to upgrade from Economy Plus to Business Class on my flight to Paris?

That's an incredible deal. On trips to Europe, a Business Class ticket will run you six to eight times the fare to ride the same flight in Coach.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at August 27, 2023 03:39 PM (bQKgA)

138 Hmmmm, do I shell out the extra $917 to upgrade from Economy Plus to Business Class on my flight to Paris?

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 03:37 PM (fe7in)

You will make up the difference on drinks alone.

Not to mention the almonds.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 27, 2023 03:40 PM (aD39U)

139 136 What airline?

Economy Plus can be quite good.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 03:39 PM

Flying out on United direct to Paris. Return trip is Amsterdam to Frankfurt to Newark. Combo of United/Lufthansa

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 03:41 PM (fe7in)

140 Not to mention the almonds.

You can pretend they are filets.

Posted by: Notorious BFD at August 27, 2023 03:42 PM (Xrfse)

141 Flying out on United direct to Paris. Return trip is Amsterdam to Frankfurt to Newark. Combo of United/Lufthansa

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 03:41 PM (fe7in)

$917 to upgrade both ways?

Yes.

One way?

Nope. Economy Plus on United is good enough.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 03:42 PM (lQONO)

142 Nope. Economy Plus on United is good enough.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 03:42 PM (lQONO)

Luxury. We traveled KLM or tramp steamer.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 27, 2023 03:44 PM (aD39U)

143 137 Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at August 27, 2023 03:39 PM

Tempted, but just cannot justify adding that much onto my debt. Maybe next year, thinking of visiting Italy.

138 You will make up the difference on drinks alone.
Not to mention the almonds.
Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 27, 2023 03:40 PM

Nah, I'm a cheap date. Really do not drink that much. The almonds on the other hand......

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 03:44 PM (fe7in)

144 77 With the cancer raging inside me that I'm afraid will be the sum total of my consulting work this month.
Posted by: moon_over_vermont at August 27, 2023 02:40 PM (xt1W3)

Very sorry. Glad you were up for some spirited kibitzing!

Posted by: m at August 27, 2023 03:46 PM (30MvH)

145 Greta would have a chartered sailboat to get her across the Atlantic

Posted by: Skip at August 27, 2023 03:46 PM (MOY79)

146 My driveway needs replacing too along with [part of] the garage floor.

No problem with puddles forming ice as for CBD but the unevenness of it makes it a PITA to shovel in winter.

Posted by: andycanuck (krqg6) at August 27, 2023 03:47 PM (krqg6)

147 Oh but she wouldn't be paying

Posted by: Skip at August 27, 2023 03:47 PM (MOY79)

148 141 Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 03:42 PM

It was just one way, Newark to Paris.

To upgrade the Frankfurt to Newark to business class would be an additional $7,000 which is a big HELL NO!!!!

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 03:47 PM (fe7in)

149 145 Greta would have a chartered sailboat to get her across the Atlantic

Posted by: Skip at August 27, 2023 03:46 PM

Let her. And when she runs into a storm she cannot handle the world will have one less whiny scrunt.

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 03:49 PM (fe7in)

150 Let her. And when she runs into a storm she cannot handle the world will have one less whiny scrunt.

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 03:49 PM (fe7in)

--------
How dare you?

Posted by: 496 at August 27, 2023 03:49 PM (nxjyx)

151 150 How dare you?

Posted by: 496 at August 27, 2023 03:49 PM

Heh heh heh Shouldn't that be a !!!! and not a ? ;-)

Posted by: Scuba_Dude at August 27, 2023 03:51 PM (fe7in)

152 Say Bonjour to Mary Ann in Paris. She is at the Hotel Pierre.

Posted by: Mr Babbel at August 27, 2023 03:53 PM (83IzV)

153 That garage floor looks indestructible.

Posted by: m at August 27, 2023 03:54 PM (30MvH)

154 Breaking911 @Breaking911 23m
SHERIFF T.K. WATERS: "The story is always about guns — people are bad — this guy's a bad guy. If I could take my gun off right now, and I lay it on this counter, nothing will happen. It'll sit there — but as soon as wicked person grabs ahold of that handgun and starts shooting people with it — there's the problem."

"The problem is the individual."

[BTW, he's an older black man.]

Breaking911 @Breaking911 36m
NEW: Pres. Biden issues statement on Jacksonville shooting

"We must refuse to live in a country where Black families going to the store or Black students going to school live in fear of being gunned down because of the color of their skin. Hate must have no safe harbor. Silence is complicity and we must not remain silent.
=====
BTW, seven blacks shot at Jamaican event yesterday in MA; black gangbangers shot five at OK high school football game; and three shot in Chicago Sox stadium from stray gangbanger shots fired from outside.

Posted by: andycanuck (krqg6) at August 27, 2023 03:57 PM (krqg6)

155 The suggestions about the grass driveway with the grids are genius level. They also look great on two-track, but if you have a long driveway, two track looks great no matter how you do it.

Posted by: Oglebay at August 27, 2023 03:57 PM (ogTiX)

156 That garage floor looks indestructible.

Posted by: m at August 27, 2023 03:54 PM (30MvH)

It is. It's fantastic!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 04:01 PM (lQONO)

157 Breaking911 @Breaking911 1h
BREAKING: Video Released Of Mass Shooting At Jacksonville Dollar General Store; Shooter ID'ed As Ryan Palmeter [see sock link]

In the replies:
Fire Captain @FireCap89644600 1h Replying to @Breaking911
Last month, 4 old white people were gunned down and killed in Hampton, GA

You didn’t hear about this story because it doesn’t fit with the narrative

Posted by: andycanuck (krqg6) at August 27, 2023 04:01 PM (krqg6)

158 Wash up and get upstairs
FOODIE NOODIE

Posted by: Skip at August 27, 2023 04:02 PM (MOY79)

159 Posted by: andycanuck (krqg6) at August 27, 2023 03:57 PM (krqg6)

Obviously the black face of white supremacy.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 04:02 PM (lQONO)

160 EAT NOW

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at August 27, 2023 04:04 PM (llON8)

161 154 BTW, seven blacks shot at Jamaican event yesterday in MA; black gangbangers shot five at OK high school football game; and three shot in Chicago Sox stadium from stray gangbanger shots fired from outside.
Posted by: andycanuck (krqg6) at August 27, 2023 03:57 PM (krqg6)

Nice reporting, andycanuck!

Posted by: m at August 27, 2023 04:04 PM (30MvH)

162 That garage floor looks indestructible.

Posted by: m at August 27, 2023 03:54 PM (30MvH)

It is. It's fantastic!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 27, 2023 04:01 PM (lQONO)

Is that an epoxy coating?

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 27, 2023 04:05 PM (aD39U)

163 From Heavy:
||The Sheriff said that there was a previous 2016 domestic call in Clay County involving the suspect, but it did not result in an arrest. He did not provide additional details but said in the later news conference that the call involved the suspect and his brother.

The suspect also was previously subjected to the Baker Act in 2017, Waters said. “The Baker Act is a Florida law that enables families and loved ones to provide emergency mental health services and temporary detention for people who are impaired because of their mental illness, and who are unable to determine their needs for treatment,” according to UF Health. He was only 15 at the time.||

Mom is a Dem working for Medicare [retired now?]; dad hates MAGA and J6ers -- a Farcebook profile photo of them shows them both dressed as hippies [although no date given].

Posted by: andycanuck (krqg6) at August 27, 2023 04:14 PM (krqg6)

164 Granite curbs

Posted by: L - Practice makes perfect. They know their enemy at August 27, 2023 04:41 PM (GshMh)

165 Well unlike most of us these days in the clutches of BIDENOMICS...

so glad you have that kind of disposable income to consider those options.

If I were you...go with stone substrate.. thinking # 3 (with proper drainage) imbed the PEG looped heating system and lay over pavers on top.

That should work just fine through many winters.

Posted by: Nightwatch at August 27, 2023 11:31 PM (UsQA1)

166 I'm making $90 an hour working from home. I never imagined that it was honest to goodness yet my closest companion is earning 16,000 US dollars a month by working on the connection, that was truly astounding for me, she prescribed for me to attempt it simply. Everybody must try this job now by just using this website... www.Salary49.com

Posted by: www.Payathome7.com at August 28, 2023 02:03 PM (Sa6Mz)

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