Woke Hasbro/Wizards of the Coast to Replace Half-Elf and Half-Orc Races in Dungeons and Dragons... Claiming That "Half" Races are "Inherently Racist"

D&D's rules are being revised for a new cashgrab, I mean a new set of rules which will be almost unchanged since the last set, but just changed enough to require that D&D players spend $100+ per person to have the slightly revised rules.

Among Hasbro's/Wizards of the Coast's highest priorities? Making the psuedo-Dark-Ages world of D&D Woke AF. Making sure that everyone in this blood-soaked game about murdering monsters and taking their stuff has the exalted levels of sensitivity of DEI enforcement officers at San Francisco State University.

I can't wait to Roll for My Gender Identity in the upcoming game, and then going into the dungeon to find magical +2 Pronouns of Privilege.

'Dungeons & Dragons' To Remove Half-Species From Player's Handbook, Claims The Entire Idea Is "Inherently Racist"
Spencer Baculi

In their latest step forward on their long march to lost profits, Wizards of the Coast has revealed that they will be removing the concept of 'Half-' species from the Dungeons & Dragons Player's Handbook on the grounds that they are "not comfortable" including an "inherently racist" concept in the game.

This forthcoming update was first announced publicly at the recent D&D Creator Summit, an event wherein Wizards of the Coast gathered a number of notable personalities ranging from game developers to content creators and provided them with a sneak peek at Dungeons & Dragons' upcoming releases.

By the way, they're also removing the word "Race" from the game, because I guess the word "race" is itself racist. They're replacing that word with "Species," which... yeah doesn't sound like a word that people in a pre-industrial society would use.

Eventually, the post-demo Q&A turned to the topic of WotC's ongoing efforts to sanitize D&D, beginning with a question about how exactly the publisher makes use of their sensitivity readers.
"We don't send everything to the same people all the time," Crawford explained of their content review process (per a summary of the event posted to the EN World forum by user brimmels and a recap provided by content creator Daniel Kwan). "Different reviewers have different areas of expertise and experience. Everything gets sent to at least 2 people, sometimes more. The old inclusion review process had holes in it because they would only send out what they thought would be a problem. Now EVERYTHING is sent out so we aren't guessing what might be a problem."

"Our team are game designers and storytellers, we're not experts in culture and inclusion," he added. "So we're focused on what damage should this creature do. That's why everything goes through inclusion review now so everything in our game brings out delight. Even reprints are going through inclusion review. That's why some older books are changing, too."

To this end, Crawford then confirmed that due to the game now having four elf variants for players to choose from when creating a character -- standard Elves, high Elves, Wolf Elves, and the Drow -- the Player's Handbook would soon be revised to do away with 'half-' species.
"Frankly, we are not comfortable, and haven't been for years with any of the options that start with 'half'," he explained of this decision. "The half construction is inherently racist so we simply aren't going to include it in the new Player's Handbook."

They later clarified -- or clarilied, amirite? -- that they were not removing the concept of half-species altogther, but just wanted to change the terminology to something more PC, like "Children of Different Humanoid Kinds."

The currently-being-tested adjustments, as seen in the publisher's official materials, will apparently see the existence of Half-species replaced with a new system known as "Children of Different Humanoid Kinds:.

So it's one of those PC language-vandalism things, like where they demand everyone stop saying "the blind" and start saying "People Without Sight." It won't be "Half-Elves," it will be People Who Just Happen to Have an Elf Parent and a Human Parent and There's Nothing Wrong with That.

Oh, boy, this is gonna be great! Did I mention that this game is supposed to take place during a time of barbarism and superstition, but every character will now specify its Preferred Pronouns?

These new Woke AF game "improvements" were announced at a "Creator Summit," in which major independent creators and D&D commentators were flown to WotC's corporate campus to be turned into Advertising Vectors to promote The New Improved D&D.

To their credit, the guests didn't go along with that corporate buy-off-the-influencers plan, and spent their time roasting WotC for its predatory business tactics.

Indestructoboy, one of the major whistleblowers responsible for revealing the OGL controversy with Dungeons and Dragons, was one of these voices at the summit. As the event progressed, it played out more like a press release than a summit, causing content creators to become irritated. According to Indestructoboy, Wizards of the Coast executive producer Kyle Brink gave evasive, dismissive answers to questions raised by the audience. This came to a head during the VTT demonstration, where the presentation fully devolved into a lengthy Q&A segment where content creators grilled Wizards of the Coast on its business practices.
Firmly on its back foot, Wizards of the Coast tried to bring an end to the Q&A after a tense half-hour discussion. However, the Dungeons and Dragons content creators at the summit unanimously voted to continue the conversation--even at the risk of missing out on some of the exclusive reveals Wizards of the Coast had planned. The session continued well past the allotted time, and pushed the summit itself to last nearly three hours longer than it was supposed to.

Via Clownfish TV. I mention all this nerdy as a preamble to this point: the box office of the Dungeons & Dragons movie, which was weak out of the gate, fell 60% in its second weekend, falling not to second place behind the Mario Bros. movie, but to third place behind that film and John Wick 4, which had been released the week before D&D.

Its worldwide global box office is under $100 million and it will struggle mightily to break even. The movie cost $150 million. There was likely $100-150 million spent on advertising, and as always, remember only about 60% of ticket sales go to the studios. The rest is split with the theaters actually exhibiting the movie.

Oh, and Clownfish reveals further that the movie was originally supposed to feature the D&D novel's closest thing to a major star, the Drow ranger Drzzt DoUrden, but they replaced him with the black paladin because... Drow, or "Dark Elves," are black, like ebony-black, and so any depiction of them would be accused of being "blackface."

Oh no, so problematic!

I have mixed feelings on the complete Woke Failure of this film, because it's a decent movie and, just on its own merits, it deserves better.

But we're not just looking at its own merits, but a toxic Woke Corporate Culture which is alienating its core audience.

And so I do have give a partial cheer for this movie bombing, just to reinforce the motto of the original D&D boxed set:

Get woke, go broke.

Okay that's not what the game ever said but if Hasbro can "update" the game to include modern woke buzzwords, I can retroactively make the game into an anti-woke teaching aid.

If you think I'm kidding about the blackface thing -- nope. Professor Chang dressed like a "Dark Elf" in Community's D&D episode, and the entire left wing set itself on fire, screaming THIS IS NOT OKAY!

This episode -- one of the show's three or four most famous episodes -- was removed from streaming services.

So Netflix ditched Chang as a Drow.
One of the best episodes in the whole series!

Such a Pierce thing to do. #community pic.twitter.com/c4dvUOepZl
— ⚔️ David J. West ⚔️ (@David_JWest) June 29, 2020

Posted by: Ace at 04:30 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 st

Posted by: Chainsaw at April 11, 2023 04:31 PM (p7g/X)

2 Ummm, I play a half-elf in my current DnD campaign...

Posted by: Nova Local at April 11, 2023 04:33 PM (exHjb)

3 NERDS!

Posted by: mikeski at April 11, 2023 04:33 PM (n8che)

4 Incels hardest hit.

Posted by: Peaches at April 11, 2023 04:34 PM (14URa)

5 so

does the Succubus have a cock or not?

Do I need to make a second saving throw?

or can I enjoy failing the first one?

Posted by: BumperStickerist at April 11, 2023 04:36 PM (2llsH)

6 These motherfuckers will not rest until they've wokified, fagified, and trannyfied every single last fucking industry and brand. Fuck them right up the ass with a Sword of Wounding +4.

Posted by: Get the fuck out of my movies, games and beer at April 11, 2023 04:37 PM (V6LRK)

7 I nooded.

Posted by: Darrell Harris at April 11, 2023 04:37 PM (/iWhV)

8 1st Edition AD&D is best edition!

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 04:37 PM (YIVH2)

9 I have to admit I've had 40 years to get into dnd and never bothered.

Posted by: JEM at April 11, 2023 04:37 PM (8erNz)

10 These motherfuckers will not rest until they've wokified, fagified, and trannyfied every single last fucking industry and brand. Fuck them right up the ass with a Sword of Wounding +4.
Posted by: Get the fuck out of my movies, games and beer at April 11, 2023 04:37 PM (V6LRK)
---
Where's a vorpal blade when you really need it?

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 04:38 PM (YIVH2)

11 >>>NERDS!
Posted by: mikeski

We nerds are better at sex than jocks, because jocks just think about sports, and nerds just think about sex.

Posted by: Robert Carrdine from Revenge of the Nerds at April 11, 2023 04:38 PM (iHBZj)

12 Half brain = half profit. Maybe

Posted by: scampydog at April 11, 2023 04:38 PM (2bFN5)

13 So, you're telling me Hollywood is totally fucked?

Posted by: Huck Follywood at April 11, 2023 04:38 PM (fA91Z)

14 Fuck them right up the ass with a Sword of Wounding +4.

**********

you have a newsletter?

Posted by: The Unvaxxed and Unmasked Ranger - America is Dead - National Divorce NOW at April 11, 2023 04:38 PM (VTu1l)

15 I found some pocket lint.

So anyway...

Posted by: Martini Farmer at April 11, 2023 04:38 PM (Q4IgG)

16 i guess the movie will be coming to VOD sooner than expected

Posted by: ace at April 11, 2023 04:39 PM (iHBZj)

17
So we're down to just white folks bein' the bad dudes, right?

"cause I'm ok with that as long as they be clearly identified as not Democrats.

Posted by: Auspex at April 11, 2023 04:39 PM (j4U/Z)

18 Yes. I need a bunch of stupid frivolous assholes on the left coast to police my fantasy games for me.
This has been the missing piece of the puzzle all along.

Posted by: Dr. Claw at April 11, 2023 04:39 PM (Hszs6)

19 TBF there was this computer game, that nerds modified HEAVILY. Skyrim The nerds made it so you can change the appearance of characters and NPCs. They made it so you can have Rap Video Ho's wearing nothing, or almost nothing. Its almost ridiculous. No it is ridiculous. No, its ridiculous and jiggly, but totally player dependent. It freaked out a lot of feminists.

Posted by: Its a free country and sometimes people have fun in an unapproved way at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM (yWzMP)

20 Sword of Wounding +4.

How many damage points does the Barbed Cock of Satan get?

Posted by: JEM at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM (8erNz)

21 Then: Conan throwing the scantily clad princess over his shoulder is he stabs the dragon in its throat with his +3 against dragons sword.

Now: Dylan puts on the diaphanous princess dress while the dragon breaks out its +3 "lube of warming"

Posted by: 18-1 at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM (lc5cP)

22 6 These motherfuckers will not rest until they've wokified, fagified, and trannyfied every single last fucking industry and brand. Fuck them right up the ass with a Sword of Wounding +4.
Posted by: Get the fuck out of my movies, games and beer at April 11, 2023 04:37 PM (V6LRK)

********

Need to add Flaming, Burning Acid to the powers of that Sword of Wounding.

Posted by: Sasquatch, the Original Trans-Wookie at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM (xxG/v)

23 If Hasbeen/Wokesters of the Coast want to fail, let them.

Posted by: Grumpy and Recalcitrant at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM (nRMeC)

24 Half races gone? That is gonna leave a mark with the player base.

Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM (ncXxy)

25 Claiming That "Half" Races are "Inherently Racist"

Barack Obama and Colin Kapernick hardest hit.

Posted by: The ARC of History! at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM (2tUFv)

26 I have to admit I've had 40 years to get into dnd and never bothered.

************

Ditto, mostly because I found the game satanic and stupid and ghey, but mostly satanic

and also ridiculously hyped up magical fads turn me off, which is why I never got into Harry Potter either

Posted by: The Unvaxxed and Unmasked Ranger - America is Dead - National Divorce NOW at April 11, 2023 04:41 PM (VTu1l)

27 I supported Baldur's Gate III over a year ago and will play the game on full release, but that's the end of WotC support from me.
Sad.
A DM from 30 years ago used to brutalize my half-orc. I was lucky if I could sleep in a barn while the rest of the party pinched wenches butts and drank ale at the local inn.

Posted by: Fool Otto at April 11, 2023 04:41 PM (DB16e)

28 Never was big into D&D.
My current game of choice is Twilight Struggle, usually against the computer.

Posted by: PabloD at April 11, 2023 04:41 PM (ChmlL)

29 Roll to save vs. Woke: 4 D6. 24-18 You are still a rock-ribbed Warrior (Slice offending NPC into tiny, quivering gobbets of smelly flesh. +6 on all attacks). 17-12 You stare blankly at the NPC, wondering what in the world was just said (Stunned 2 rounds) 11-4 You begin to think that the NPC is somehow making sense. Other members of your Party begin to re-assess your value to the enterprise. (Roll to save vs. Ostracism 2 D

Posted by: Brewingfrog at April 11, 2023 04:41 PM (c7Cz0)

30 Well. Good thing I have Community on DVD. Except for the gas leak year.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Southpaw at April 11, 2023 04:41 PM (xPJvm)

31 25 Claiming That "Half" Races are "Inherently Racist"

Barack Obama and Colin Kapernick hardest hit.
Posted by: The ARC of History! at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM (2tUFv)

If only there was a theme song

Posted by: Cher at April 11, 2023 04:42 PM (2bFN5)

32 I'm waiting for the geniuses to declare playing humans and demi-humans is bigoted and to mandate you can only play humanoids.

Posted by: sven at April 11, 2023 04:42 PM (Lzpvj)

33 sorry if this is boring to some of you. I try to slip in an entertainment/fun kind of post at 4pm just for a break. this is what I had for today.

Posted by: ace at April 11, 2023 04:42 PM (iHBZj)

34 Woke pushes Cultural crap, how can anyone be racist against Elves when there isn't one on the whole freaking planet?

Posted by: Skip at April 11, 2023 04:42 PM (xhxe8)

35 I say good. Let Hasbro and WoTC alienate its customer base.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls - an election is simply a festival for the majority at April 11, 2023 04:42 PM (ppBhU)

36 Haven't a clue about any of this. Have fun and see y'all later this evening.

Posted by: Notorious BFD at April 11, 2023 04:42 PM (Xrfse)

37 All I know about these games is what I saw on Reno 911.

Lightning bolt, lightning bolt!

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 11, 2023 04:43 PM (lTGtQ)

38 "By the way, they're also removing the word "Race" from the game, because I guess the word "race" is itself racist."

It's right there in the word!

Posted by: L. Ron Hoover at April 11, 2023 04:43 PM (iayUP)

39 I played the gold box games on PC and Baldurs Gate series. Never pnp

Posted by: A dude in MI at April 11, 2023 04:43 PM (/6GbT)

40 If Hasbeen/Wokesters of the Coast want to fail, let them.

Posted by: Grumpy and Recalcitrant at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM

Unless they start fvcking around with Magic the Gathering card game, they will be 100% fine. If they chose to mess up that game with woke garbage then they will die.

Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at April 11, 2023 04:43 PM (ncXxy)

41 It's a nerd game for nerds, and not important. But the overall thrust of this argument is.

In an age of virulent, essentialist racism, where does that leave the mixed kids? Is my daughter white, or black? I suppose she'll have to choose. I hope she can have the clarity of mind to identify as black and publicly denounce me and excoriate me for my whiteness, but secretly still love me when nobody else is looking and judging.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (oINRc)

42 8 Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 04:37 PM (YIVH2)

Probably, although the skills system in 2d edition was not bad and you could do interesting things with Player's Options Skills and Powers.

You knew the hill was downward when they removed the assassin class.

Posted by: sven at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (Lzpvj)

43 20 Sword of Wounding +4.

How many damage points does the Barbed Cock of Satan get?

Posted by: JEM at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM (8erNz)

6d9

Posted by: Simple Stevo at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (NFaWv)

44 I cannot wait for these unimaginative untalented mediocre half wits to be standing in the unemployment line along with Anheuser-Busch employees.

Wizards of the Coast makes Kathleen Kennedy and her crew of retards at Disney look like the Manhattan project.

Posted by: Azathoth at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (wb1YC)

45 Wind's picking up out thar. Overcast, looks like rain.

Posted by: JT at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (T4tVD)

46 I liked the "setting up worlds" aspect of D&D, but the game itself bored me most of the time.

I dislike games in general. I have a very short attention spa...

Ooh! Found some trail mix.

What was I saying?

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Southpaw at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (xPJvm)

47 Are there 50 year olds who have been playing this stuff for 40 odd years? At some point, you would think they would have to grow up.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (lTGtQ)

48 No mixed races?

I'm guessing my proposed spinoff Melungeons and Dragons will not be green-lighted.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (vXKrL)

49 Jim Jordan publicity-grabs his latest fifteen minutes by sending a meaningless subpoena to Alvin Bragg, so Bragg today retaliates with a lawsuit against Jordan.

These guys should just get a room. No one believed the Jordan potemkin hearings bullshit, and everyone knows Bragg is in return abusing the court system for his share of more publicity.

A match made in heaven, these two.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (2Ywua)

50 What happened to halflings? Are they a "half" race or not?

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (YIVH2)

51 this is all so incredibly gay

Posted by: the Spin Doctors at April 11, 2023 04:45 PM (w0NJk)

52 >>>
Unless they start fvcking around with Magic the Gathering card game, they will be 100% fine. If they chose to mess up that game with woke garbage then they will die.

i think they already have. At the very least, they angered the MtG base by pumping out expansion after expansion with low quality control, just to milk their cows to the breaking point

Posted by: ace at April 11, 2023 04:45 PM (iHBZj)

53 Enchanted Dagger of Transing. While in the player's possession he must make a savings throw vs magic every 24 hours, or he will fall into a trance and use the dagger to cut off his own cock and balls.

Posted by: New D&D items at April 11, 2023 04:45 PM (V6LRK)

54 41 Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (oINRc)

She would be well served to pretend to be the blackest child on Earth if Colon Kaspernaski is any indication.

Of all the reasons I hate Obama the main one is he was sold as the guy who was gonna end this shit and our generation could have.

Posted by: sven at April 11, 2023 04:45 PM (Lzpvj)

55 Wizards of the Coast:

"We demand to be taken seriously."

Posted by: A Concerned Citizen at April 11, 2023 04:45 PM (zcPgo)

56 Unless they start fvcking around with Magic the Gathering card game, they will be 100% fine. If they chose to mess up that game with woke garbage then they will die.
Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at April 11, 2023 04:43 PM (ncXxy)
----
Uh, you are a few years late for that...MTG has been woke for even longer than D&D

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 04:46 PM (YIVH2)

57 *looks at Drizzt art*

Hey, I think we own that book!

Posted by: pookysgirl switched to Pathfinder ages ago at April 11, 2023 04:46 PM (dtlDP)

58 "Children of Different Humanoid Kinds" was an underrated follow up album to "Tales from Topographic Oceans"

Posted by: Chuck C at April 11, 2023 04:46 PM (dAv7M)

59 "We will be ready for the D and D movie."

Tubi and Vudo

Posted by: Blanco at April 11, 2023 04:46 PM (F0+HC)

60 50 What happened to halflings? Are they a "half" race or not?
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (YIVH2)

Probably got renamed to little people.

Posted by: Red Turban Someguy - The Republic is already dead! at April 11, 2023 04:47 PM (eYoxG)

61 Are there 50 year olds who have been playing this stuff for 40 odd years? At some point, you would think they would have to grow up.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM

I am 29+ and I still play Army men. I play bolt Action, Flames of War and Team Yankee all military miniatures games.

Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at April 11, 2023 04:47 PM (ncXxy)

62 They couldn’t get rid of the entire concept of halflings because the wokies making TV commercials insist every family is mixed race.

Posted by: Ian S. at April 11, 2023 04:47 PM (3cXfB)

63 Are there 50 year olds who have been playing this stuff for 40 odd years?

********************

In fairness who the fuck wants to be an adult in today's gay assed 500 pronouned world?

Posted by: The Unvaxxed and Unmasked Ranger - America is Dead - National Divorce NOW at April 11, 2023 04:47 PM (VTu1l)

64 I kid about Tubi, that's actually a pretty decent streaming service and lots of cult movies on there

Posted by: Blanco at April 11, 2023 04:47 PM (F0+HC)

65 In the new version of Axis and Allies, the US had to give Ukraine 25% of it's production every round.

Posted by: fd at April 11, 2023 04:47 PM (iayUP)

66 As they said in Boston, “There goes the neighborhood.”

Posted by: Hokey Pokey at April 11, 2023 04:47 PM (glGDV)

67 >>"Half" Races are "Inherently Racist"

I can't argue.

Posted by: Barack Hussein Obama at April 11, 2023 04:47 PM (SIRiz)

68 The point of all this is to make all entertainment woke.

So yes they'll woke-ify D&D first but their goal is to do that to ALL fantasy genres.

Hell by the time they are done Slaanesh will be the good guy in Warhammer and we'll be talking about reparations for Orcs in Lord of the Rings....

Posted by: 18-1 at April 11, 2023 04:47 PM (lc5cP)

69 Meanwhile, WholeFoods closes yet another San Francisco grocery store, citing street crime and general anarchy.

America's future, since the Democrats want to sub in Grusome Newsome for President Poopy Pants, or so claims Tucker Carlson.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at April 11, 2023 04:48 PM (2Ywua)

70 65 Posted by: fd at April 11, 2023 04:47 PM (iayUP)

also the US player has to reduce his production potential 25% each turn or face expulsion from office.

Posted by: sven at April 11, 2023 04:48 PM (Lzpvj)

71 They couldn’t get rid of the entire concept of halflings because the wokies making TV commercials insist every family is mixed race.

*****************

and its always black guy/white girl couples too

motherfucka gangsta BLM shitbirds, taking all our sistas

Posted by: The Unvaxxed and Unmasked Ranger - America is Dead - National Divorce NOW at April 11, 2023 04:48 PM (VTu1l)

72
33 sorry if this is boring to some of you. I try to slip in an entertainment/fun kind of post at 4pm just for a break. this is what I had for today.
Posted by: ace at April 11, 2023 04:42 PM (iHBZj)

Dude, just staring at the rich pelt of Ewok fur is mesmerizing.

Don't ever change or worry what morons are trying to think about.

Posted by: Auspex at April 11, 2023 04:48 PM (j4U/Z)

73 Meanwhile, WholeFoods closes yet another San Francisco grocery store, citing street crime and general anarchy.

Wanting to be safe from crime is...racist!

Posted by: 18-1 at April 11, 2023 04:48 PM (lc5cP)

74 Gay? You mean feces, fatal disease and suicide?

Posted by: Hokey Pokey at April 11, 2023 04:49 PM (glGDV)

75 The Girdle of Femininity/Masculinity used to be a cursed magic item.

I suppose they will now make that the most powerful, desirable artifact in the game.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 04:49 PM (YIVH2)

76 Well.
I half give a damn.
But only half.
The other half laughs derisively.

Posted by: Diogenes at April 11, 2023 04:49 PM (anj39)

77 "also the US player has to reduce his production potential 25% each turn or face expulsion from office.
Posted by: sven"

They should have called it "Fisk".

Posted by: fd at April 11, 2023 04:49 PM (iayUP)

78 Fortunately for me, they can't really make solitaire woke.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 11, 2023 04:49 PM (lTGtQ)

79 Wow.
I've been reading nerds and dweebs all this time!
Had. No. Idea.
Heh

Posted by: MkY at April 11, 2023 04:49 PM (cPGH3)

80 >>>75 The Girdle of Femininity/Masculinity used to be a cursed magic item.
I suppose they will now make that the most powerful, desirable artifact in the game.

lol

Posted by: ace at April 11, 2023 04:49 PM (iHBZj)

81 A problem for my stepdaughter - she's not mixed- will be that she's a based AF black girl. Zero tolerance for Marxist bullshit. So she's a flat-out race traitor.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 04:50 PM (oINRc)

82 sorry if this is boring to some of you. I try to slip in an entertainment/fun kind of post at 4pm just for a break. this is what I had for today.

**********

Lamont would never apologize for his content

Posted by: The Unvaxxed and Unmasked Ranger - America is Dead - National Divorce NOW at April 11, 2023 04:50 PM (VTu1l)

83 52 >>>
Unless they start fvcking around with Magic the Gathering card game, they will be 100% fine. If they chose to mess up that game with woke garbage then they will die.

i think they already have. At the very least, they angered the MtG base by pumping out expansion after expansion with low quality control, just to milk their cows to the breaking point
Posted by: ace at April 11, 2023 04:45 PM (iHBZj)

It's strange that companies keep on trying to go after new audiences or adopt hostile monetization practices instead of just selling ancillary products to customers.

Has no one noticed you can sell a fan on more than the base product(which should remain high quality to avoid losing customers)?

Posted by: Red Turban Someguy - The Republic is already dead! at April 11, 2023 04:50 PM (eYoxG)

84 >>*looks at Drizzt art*

Heroic character.

Can't have him being black now, can we?

Posted by: garrett at April 11, 2023 04:50 PM (SIRiz)

85 Are there 50 year olds who have been playing this stuff for 40 odd years? At some point, you would think they would have to grow up.

I'll stop right after you homos stop watching sports, and stop playing games of any kind, and just agree to get cancer and die from smoking unfiltered Luckies in your wood shop like all real men are supposed to do apparently.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls - an election is simply a festival for the majority at April 11, 2023 04:50 PM (ppBhU)

86 To prove my nerdness...

The reason I play a half-elf is b/c my character, a modern day Ebenezer Scrooge wild magic sorcerer, needed to be able to de-age and not look his full age and yet still pass as the "what you've seen on tv" character. B/c I play him from living in Dickens' time to nebulous today so he's 247ish years old, but he's de-aged quite a few times with magic.

And that's how you nerd out...and get to still play the smart, weak, cranky guy who can take out his whole team if you piss him off and who carries the whole team's important stuff b/c he's got "the magic bag" with weight not a worry...and the old guy is still the guy in Christmas morning, so he won't screw you over...unless you do it to him 1st...

Posted by: Nova Local at April 11, 2023 04:50 PM (exHjb)

87 Universities are solving racism with segregated events and facilities, and now the entertainment biz solves it by way of anti-miscegenation.

I guess I've been thinking about this whole racism thing backwards...

Posted by: Simple Stevo at April 11, 2023 04:50 PM (NFaWv)

88 >>>Don't ever change or worry what morons are trying to think about.

thanks man, but I do realize this is a niche thing. But I do like the four o'clock follies midday palate cleanser.

Posted by: ace at April 11, 2023 04:50 PM (iHBZj)

89 Does it come with Bud Lite?

Posted by: Rick Wilson at April 11, 2023 04:51 PM (DMyTF)

90 Woke Hasbro/Wizards of the Coast to Replace Half-Elf and Half-Orc Races in Dungeons and Dragons... Claiming That "Half" Races are "Inherently Racist"

OK, we can put Hasbro down as in favor of segregation and against interracial marriage.

Posted by: Blanco Basura - Z28.310 at April 11, 2023 04:51 PM (Bd6X8)

91 I used to play a dwarf that smelled so bad it could stun.

Posted by: fd at April 11, 2023 04:51 PM (iayUP)

92 I used to play a dwarf that smelled so bad it could stun.

See, I knew you people were h8ters!

Posted by: Robert Reich at April 11, 2023 04:51 PM (lc5cP)

93 Fortunately for me, they can't really make solitaire woke.

***************

https://mymodernmet.com/gsb-playing-cards/

You were saying?

Posted by: The Unvaxxed and Unmasked Ranger - America is Dead - National Divorce NOW at April 11, 2023 04:51 PM (VTu1l)

94 Woke Hasbro/Wizards of the Coast to Replace Half-Elf and Half-Orc Races in Dungeons and Dragons... Claiming That "Half" Races are "Inherently Racist"
---
Them boys ain't Orc! They ain't Orc.

They's miscegenated!!!

Posted by: Orc Homer Stokes at April 11, 2023 04:51 PM (krQz2)

95 >>WholeFoods closes yet another San Francisco grocery store, citing street crime and general anarchy.

For a Food Desert...

you'd think there would be LESS shit on the sidewalks?

Posted by: garrett at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (SIRiz)

96 88 Posted by: ace at April 11, 2023 04:50 PM (iHBZj)

It's not as niche as people think, and believe it or not I think RPG tables are where the freako fucksticks first got humored enough on "trigger warnings" and the bullshit to go full woketard nazi over the decades.

The fight in the D ampersand D community had been going on to whatever degree for the last 40 years.

Posted by: sven at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (Lzpvj)

97 Children of Different Humanoid Kinds

Aren't there non-humanoid races in DnD that get together? Birds, frogs, turtles, and bunnies are the ones that come to mind. Although a cross between a turtle and a hare would be hilarious.

"I'm gonna win this race! No, I want to take a nap! I'M GONNA WIN THIS RACE!"

Posted by: pookysgirl, snickering just thinking about it at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (dtlDP)

98 Woke Gen. Milley is Stepping Down.

Posted by: SMOD at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (RHGPo)

99 I used to play a dwarf that smelled so bad it could stun.

There was an H1B guy at one job that had the same power.

Posted by: Blanco Basura - Z28.310 at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (Bd6X8)

100 A problem for my stepdaughter - she's not mixed- will be that she's a based AF black girl. Zero tolerance for Marxist bullshit. So she's a flat-out race traitor.

Maybe, she'll go full 4chan and decide her old man doesn't even qualify as white. Then you can be hated by your children for diverse reasons, an it's the diversity that ultimately makes the hate so rewarding.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls - an election is simply a festival for the majority at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (ppBhU)

101 I used to play a dwarf that smelled so bad it could stun.
Posted by: fd at April 11, 2023 04:51 PM (iayUP)

I met a hobo like that in Austria. Otherworldly stank.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (oINRc)

102 Related. You know how it's cultural appropriation for white actors to play blacks or Asians or Indians or whatever? Well, if that's true, why are Robert DeNiro, Alec Baldwin, Whoopi etc. allowed to play smart people?

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? at April 11, 2023 04:53 PM (FVME7)

103 Who had 2023 as the year that mixing races became "racists" in the pool?!

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 04:53 PM (krQz2)

104 At least we don't have orctaroons.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at April 11, 2023 04:53 PM (9UlRk)

105 I can't wait for Hollywood to start limiting their audience explicitly based on race. "People Of Color" nights, and POC Only seating ssections. Maybe even water fountains will become POC Only water fountains, and busses will have POC Only seats.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at April 11, 2023 04:53 PM (2Ywua)

106 In their latest step forward on their long march to lost profits, Wizards of the Coast has revealed that they will be removing the concept of 'Half-' species from the Dungeons & Dragons Player's Handbook on the grounds that they are "not comfortable" including an "inherently racist" concept in the game.
++++
No, they're "not comfortable" with something that makes the intersectional stack harder to calculate or acknowledges how brain-dead their ideology is. Mixed-race people are a problem for the intersectionalists because you have to group them somewhere. You can group them together - but then you have to decide whether they're higher or lower. It cannot work. The mixed-race problem is a fatal problem for the intersectionalists.

This plays out on a daily basis in South Africa, where there are three meta-races: whites, blacks and coloreds. The "coloreds" are the mixed-race, and they're a pawn in the overall drama.

Mixed-race people (or characters in a game) are problematic *only* if your fixation and the anchor of your ideology is relative race positioning. "Race X is greater than Race Y." If you have *any* other anchor, mixed-race people are no problem at all.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at April 11, 2023 04:53 PM (t0OGg)

107 If this trend continues, San Francisco will spawn new term.

Theft Deserts.

When black people don't have reasonable access to shit to steal.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at April 11, 2023 04:53 PM (vXKrL)

108 92 I used to play a dwarf that smelled so bad it could stun.

See, I knew you people were h8ters!
Posted by: Robert Reich at April 11, 2023 04:51 PM (lc5cP)

So, did his team use Vaseline or petroleum jelly to be around him?

Posted by: Nova Local at April 11, 2023 04:53 PM (exHjb)

109 75 The Girdle of Femininity/Masculinity used to be a cursed magic item.
I suppose they will now make that the most powerful, desirable artifact in the game.

lol
Posted by: ace at April 11, 2023 04:49 PM (iHBZj)
---
One of my characters once got suckered into putting one on. He transformed from "Renfru" to "Renfrida".

But basically the same character more or less since his/her stats were not exceptional. Only Strength would be most affected in first edition rules.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 04:54 PM (YIVH2)

110 Woke Gen. Milley is Stepping Down.

Posted by: SMOD at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (RHGPo)

And right into a defense contractor high paying job, no doubt.

Posted by: Archer at April 11, 2023 04:54 PM (gmo/4)

111 63 Are there 50 year olds who have been playing this stuff for 40 odd years?

********************

In fairness who the fuck wants to be an adult in today's gay assed 500 pronouned world?
Posted by: The Unvaxxed and Unmasked Ranger - America is Dead - National Divorce NOW at April 11, 2023 04:47 PM (VTu1l)

Being an "adult" fucking sucks balls anyway. You give up your hopes, dreams, hobbies, interests, and identity to be tax cattle for the government, an ATM to a spendthrift ungrateful wife, have no friends, give yourself stress-related illnesses from long hours, malnutrition, and lack of sleep, and wear gay-ass polo shirts with a sport coat to networking events and make small talk with self-absorbed retards. It's nothing but a slow, soul-killing, painful slide toward the sweet release of death

Posted by: Fuck "growing up" at April 11, 2023 04:54 PM (V6LRK)

112 I used to play a dwarf that smelled so bad it could stun.
Posted by: fd at April 11, 2023 04:51 PM (iayUP)
---
My race ain't your costume, boyo!

Posted by: Stock Woke Dwarf at April 11, 2023 04:54 PM (krQz2)

113 Isn't this the Voldemort-Slytherin position, getting rid of all half breeds?

Species, btw, was used, but really just mean any subgroup, including man as a species of animal, but also of rational. Galleys would be a species of ship. It meant a specific group, as opposed to a general one.

Posted by: Eeyore at April 11, 2023 04:54 PM (TgBWG)

114 Wow.
I've been reading nerds and dweebs all this time!
Had. No. Idea.
Heh
Posted by: MkY at April 11, 2023 04:49 PM

NERDS!!!!!

Posted by: Ogre (you asshole) at April 11, 2023 04:54 PM (Wnv9h)

115 Black and Tan

Posted by: Yuengling at April 11, 2023 04:55 PM (63Dwl)

116 Speaking as someone who is 1/2 Irish and 1/2 German, I can totally testify that "half" race language is very, very inherently racist and that I am totally racist against myself from each direction and that it is very hurtful and makes me cry myself to sleep each night.

Posted by: Lazarus + Anti-Matter Lazarus at April 11, 2023 04:55 PM (VsUo2)

117 Last I heard was that One D&D was dead as a project because of overwhelming fan rejection and mockery.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 11, 2023 04:55 PM (0hOvj)

118 A friend told me they used to make X-rated playing cards.

Posted by: Maj. Healey at April 11, 2023 04:55 PM (DMyTF)

119 Being an "adult" fucking sucks balls anyway. You give up your hopes, dreams, hobbies, interests, and identity to be tax cattle for the government, an ATM to a spendthrift ungrateful wife, have no friends, give yourself stress-related illnesses from long hours, malnutrition, and lack of sleep, and wear gay-ass polo shirts with a sport coat to networking events and make small talk with self-absorbed retards. It's nothing but a slow, soul-killing, painful slide toward the sweet release of death
Posted by: Fuck "growing up" at April 11, 2023 04:54 PM

Have a Snickers.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at April 11, 2023 04:55 PM (Wnv9h)

120 >>>Wow.
I've been reading nerds and dweebs all this time!
Had. No. Idea.
Heh

it's not like anyone was hiding it

Posted by: ace at April 11, 2023 04:55 PM (iHBZj)

121 Woke Gen. Milley is Stepping Down.

Posted by: SMOD at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (RHGPo)
---
They'll need some other DC Catholic in there to reject practicing Catholics as recruits.

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 04:55 PM (krQz2)

122 DM: An ogre stands guard at the entrance of the dungeon.

Paladin: What kind of weapons does he have?

DM: Upon assuming the ogre's gender, you lose all of your paladin abilities as your alignment changes from Lawful Good to Chaotic Evil.

Cleric: I pull out my +1 Mace of Gender Detection

DM: The ogre warrior identifies as a beautiful elven maiden.

Posted by: Cave Johnson at April 11, 2023 04:56 PM (9bp5t)

123 What about the "One Drop of Orc Blood" rule makes you orc.

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable a Clear and Present Danger at April 11, 2023 04:56 PM (17s+e)

124 it's not like anyone was hiding it

Posted by: ace at April 11, 2023 04:55 PM (iHBZj)
---
Ace is out and proud!

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 04:56 PM (krQz2)

125 There goes my weekly Bud Lite/DampersandD night.

Oh, and obligatory: https://tinyurl.com/8nn7dswp

Posted by: Stu Podaso at April 11, 2023 04:56 PM (yc31Q)

126 81 Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 04:50 PM (oINRc)

I had a dark-skinned African-American protege in my job, before he left I explained any time he was in contract or contact with the feds to act like he was the craziest Antifa he could think of and he would never be fireable.

Posted by: sven at April 11, 2023 04:56 PM (Lzpvj)

127 DM: An ogre stands guard at the entrance of the dungeon.

Paladin: What kind of weapons does he have?

DM: Upon assuming the ogre's gender, you lose all of your paladin abilities as your alignment changes from Lawful Good to Chaotic Evil.

Cleric: I pull out my +1 Mace of Gender Detection

DM: The ogre warrior identifies as a beautiful elven maiden.
Posted by: Cave Johnson at April 11, 2023 04:56 PM

*vomits*

Posted by: A Grue at April 11, 2023 04:56 PM (Wnv9h)

128 All Progressives: No Race mixing is allowed.

We will even disappear the mixed races. Sure it is only fantasy today, but tomorrow we progressives will make it real.

Posted by: anon at April 11, 2023 04:57 PM (Z32m1)

129 And the loafers, Jesus fucking Christ, the loafers.

Posted by: Fuck "growing up" at April 11, 2023 04:57 PM (V6LRK)

130 "So, did his team use Vaseline or petroleum jelly to be around him?
Posted by: Nova Local"

He slept separate from the party. By choice. Being repulsive can be useful at times, but it also makes it hard to hide.

Posted by: fd at April 11, 2023 04:57 PM (iayUP)

131 I met a hobo like that in Austria. Otherworldly stank.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (oINRc)
=================
In another lifetime, I worked at 49th and Park in Manhhattan. Every time the Israeli PM came to town he stayed at the Waldorf, across the street, and the Hasidim would come out by the thousands to protest something or other. I think they refuse to take baths or something, and those guys smell to high heaven. When they gather together for blocks of angry arm-raised fist shaking, the stank is unreal.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at April 11, 2023 04:57 PM (2Ywua)

132 Being an "adult" fucking sucks balls anyway. You give up your hopes, dreams, hobbies, interests, and identity to be tax cattle for the government, an ATM to a spendthrift ungrateful wife, have no friends, give yourself stress-related illnesses from long hours, malnutrition, and lack of sleep, and wear gay-ass polo shirts with a sport coat to networking events and make small talk with self-absorbed retards. It's nothing but a slow, soul-killing, painful slide toward the sweet release of death
Posted by: Fuck "growing up" at April 11, 2023 04:54 PM (V6LRK)
---
Someone should make an RPG around this concept.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 04:57 PM (YIVH2)

133
*rolls dice*

C'moooooon, Tranny Dogboy Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff!

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 04:57 PM (oINRc)

134 Last I heard was that One D&D was dead as a project because of overwhelming fan rejection and mockery.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 11, 2023 04:55 PM (0hOvj)
---
It's not like it was the Hero System or something.

Posted by: That Guy at April 11, 2023 04:57 PM (krQz2)

135 Is it "Gay Wizards of the Coast" or "Wizards of the Gay Coast"?

I forget.

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 04:58 PM (krQz2)

136 >>133
*rolls dice*

C'moooooon, Tranny Dogboy Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff!
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice

It must be a POC.

Posted by: Maj. Healey at April 11, 2023 04:58 PM (DMyTF)

137 DM: The ogre warrior identifies as a beautiful elven maiden.

Also, as a elven woman handball player

Posted by: Hannah Mouncey at April 11, 2023 04:58 PM (lc5cP)

138 130 "So, did his team use Vaseline or petroleum jelly to be around him?
Posted by: Nova Local"

He slept separate from the party. By choice. Being repulsive can be useful at times, but it also makes it hard to hide.
Posted by: fd at April 11, 2023 04:57 PM (iayUP)

Yeah, we have a shiny armored Paladin who just stomps into every room...I make sure my character is very far away from him at all times! He does make a good "soaker" for damage...

Posted by: Nova Local at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (exHjb)

139 Gandalf the Gay? Say it ain't so!

Posted by: Eeyore at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (TgBWG)

140 Being an "adult" fucking sucks balls anyway. You give up your hopes, dreams, hobbies, interests, and identity to be tax cattle for the government, an ATM to a spendthrift ungrateful wife, have no friends, give yourself stress-related illnesses from long hours, malnutrition, and lack of sleep, and wear gay-ass polo shirts with a sport coat to networking events and make small talk with self-absorbed retards. It's nothing but a slow, soul-killing, painful slide toward the sweet release of death
Posted by: Fuck "growing up"

So you're saying that you're a "half-glass empty" kind of guy?

Posted by: only look on the bright side of life" at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (VsUo2)

141 The world of fictitious make-believe is a prime target for the trans/perv/woke crowd. It's right in their wheelhouse.

Posted by: Roy at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (7pSAY)

142
At least we don't have orctaroons.

Mmmmm, good cookie. Good cookie.

Posted by: Andy Taylor at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (63Dwl)

143 Posted by: Fuck "growing up" at April 11, 2023 04:54 PM

Oh, look- a former poster under yet another nic change.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (loYas)

144 Woke Gen. Milley is Stepping Down.

Posted by: SMOD at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (RHGPo)
==================
I predict he is in a dress by month end and featured on a Bid Light can shortly thereafter.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (2Ywua)

145 It must be a POC.
Posted by: Maj. Healey at April 11, 2023 04:58 PM (DMyTF)

He can identify as a black lab.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (oINRc)

146 White men have a maximum strength of 0.

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (krQz2)

147 134 Last I heard was that One D&D was dead as a project because of overwhelming fan rejection and mockery.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 11, 2023 04:55 PM (0hOvj)
---
It's not like it was the Hero System or something.
Posted by: That Guy at April 11, 2023 04:57 PM (krQz2)

My kids, who are in that fandom community, had told me it was pretty resoundingly mocked...

That said, we are going to cheap Tuesday next week to see the movie b/c we are nerds and it's supposed to be good, so I'll give them $5/piece...since I already paid Mario and the youngest wanted this as his movie pass movie...

Posted by: Nova Local at April 11, 2023 05:00 PM (exHjb)

148 Ha, the libs are opposed to "race mixing". David Duke would be proud.

Posted by: ... at April 11, 2023 05:00 PM (BXxcV)

149 Posted by: Fuck "growing up"

So you're saying that you're a "half-glass empty" kind of guy?

Posted by: only look on the bright side of life" at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (VsUo2)
---
*Snort!*

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 05:00 PM (krQz2)

150 Speaking as someone who is 1/2 Irish and 1/2 German, I can totally testify that "half" race language is very, very inherently racist and that I am totally racist against myself from each direction and that it is very hurtful and makes me cry myself to sleep each night.
Posted by: Lazarus + Anti-Matter Lazarus

Don't know whether to get drunk and beat up tour wife or get drunk and invade Poland?

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? at April 11, 2023 05:01 PM (FVME7)

151 He can identify as a black lab.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (oINRc)
---
That is RPC black face!

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 05:01 PM (krQz2)

152 Everything is rooted in white supremacy.
So sick of these whiners... they give me a headache.

Posted by: redridinghood at April 11, 2023 05:01 PM (NpAcC)

153 The fight in the D ampersand D community had been going on to whatever degree for the last 40 years

***

D&D started having problems when a certain demographic insisted that it was not about having fun but was instead of form of free mental health treatment.

"Here's the backstory on my character for the next hour and 15 minutes and it's a complete coincidence that all of the weird s*** that's happened to them mirrors exactly what's happened in my life!"

Posted by: Azathoth at April 11, 2023 05:01 PM (wb1YC)

154 Someone should make an RPG around this concept.

I recall there being a cartoon in the 1E DMG of fantasy characters sitting around the table playing Papers & Paychecks.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls - an election is simply a festival for the majority at April 11, 2023 05:01 PM (ppBhU)

155 Ha, the libs are opposed to "race mixing". David Duke would be proud.

David Duke spent the early 00s arguing against the WoT for Arab news outlets.

Amusingly the left developed a strange love for him...

Posted by: 18-1 at April 11, 2023 05:02 PM (lc5cP)

156 Well, I had a pretty solid post written up describing a counterpoint on some of the rules changes, but the system is flagging it as spam (let's just assume I've already heard your joke on that, ok?).

TL;DR version: rules changes leaving decisions to setting designers rather than part of the core rule set are a god thing, actually.

Posted by: can of spam at April 11, 2023 05:02 PM (7oNMO)

157 I was watching the bird feeder video, which is linked on the sidebar. It reminded me of the videos featuring bears raiding birdfeeders from peoples' decks or climbing trees to acquire the seeds.

Posted by: mrp at April 11, 2023 05:02 PM (rj6Yv)

158 Tostesterone! tostesterone! tostesterone!

It just doesn't have the same pizzazz as lightening bolt.

Posted by: Bosk at April 11, 2023 05:02 PM (VMFAF)

159 Ah the libs think different races are actually different species.

David Duke and Margaret Sanger would be proud.

Posted by: ... at April 11, 2023 05:02 PM (BXxcV)

160 Are there 50 year olds who have been playing this stuff for 40 odd years? At some point, you would think they would have to grow up.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM

Well, I started when in 74... almost 50 years ago, and yes, I know people my age who still play. Heck, I got one old friend who uses one of my old characters as an NPC in his ongoing campaign, and periodically asks me what he would do in certain situations.

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 11, 2023 05:02 PM (oHd/0)

161 Don't know whether to get drunk and beat up tour wife or get drunk and invade Poland?
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? at April 11, 2023 05:01 PM (FVME7)

You marry a polish woman, have a baby that looks like a root vegetable, and beat them up instead.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at April 11, 2023 05:02 PM (9UlRk)

162 Half-races in D&D are already woke, and removing them is racist. Half-races mean that characters from differing races — and in some cases wildly differing races — can meet, fall in love, and procreate. Eliminating them serves only concepts of racial purity and that one race shouldn’t be spoiled by joining with another. As usual, liberals are so fucking dumb.

Posted by: Elric Blade at April 11, 2023 05:03 PM (KjR/v)

163 Isn’t there an “Open D and D” ?

Posted by: SMOD at April 11, 2023 05:03 PM (RHGPo)

164 EXCLUSIVE: It's a (blended) family affair! Fox News stars Sean Hannity and Ainsley Earhardt are seen up close and personal in first photos as a couple - as it's revealed they're together in domestic bliss along with her 7-year-old daughter

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/

Please don't have children.

Posted by: Maj. Healey at April 11, 2023 05:04 PM (DMyTF)

165 You marry a polish woman, have a baby that looks like a root vegetable, and beat them up instead.
Posted by: Warai-otoko at April 11, 2023 05:02 PM (9UlRk)

Don't you mean "beet"?

Posted by: Something better might turnip at April 11, 2023 05:04 PM (V6LRK)

166 I recall there being a cartoon in the 1E DMG of fantasy characters sitting around the table playing Papers & Paychecks.
Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls - an election is simply a festival for the majority at April 11, 2023 05:01 PM (ppBhU)
---
Heh. As it happens, I'm looking at the PDF of the 1E DMG right now!

A warrior, a wizard and a cleric are around a table. The cleric is reading the rulebook for "Papers and Paychecks" while the wizard is explaining the game to an onlooker:

"It's a great new fantasy role-playing game. We pretend we're workers and students in an industrialized and technological society.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 05:04 PM (YIVH2)

167 You'd think they'd love to put Drow front and center in a movie. A Matriarchal society dedicated to evil and death with a preference toward androgyny. It basically sums up the leftist utopia of today.

Posted by: Flyguy at April 11, 2023 05:04 PM (VrVjC)

168 Please don't have children.
Posted by: Maj. Healey at April 11, 2023 05:04 PM (DMyTF)

Speaking of root vegetables...

Posted by: Warai-otoko at April 11, 2023 05:04 PM (9UlRk)

169 Dr.Doomcock is reporting that Indy 5 has been extensively changed resulting in Fleabag, Indiana Jones' god daughter, role being rewritten so she doesn't end up wiping out old Indy through sexual reassignment surgery via time travel. It still sounds like the movie's going to suck balls but it's not going to result in Indy's balls being chopped off. Short version: fuck Disney. We, the peasants, ain't putting up with this BS.

https://youtu.be/AiXKaWv4Gk8

Posted by: Lost In Space at April 11, 2023 05:05 PM (RustQ)

170 "Half-races mean that characters from differing races — and in some cases wildly differing races — can meet, fall in love, and procreate. "

Papa was a rollin' stone.

Posted by: A half Orc at April 11, 2023 05:05 PM (iayUP)

171 When questioned by a reporter as to what the underlying crime the indictment fails to name is, Bragg replied in New York State, he does not have to.

"The indictment doesn't specify it because the law does not so require," he told the journalist.

On "Hannity," Fox News legal analyst Gregg Jarrett forcefully dismissed Bragg's claim, saying he likely violated Trump's right to know what he is specifically being accused of.

"He does [have to name it, via] the Sixth Amendment," Jarrett said. "[The indictment] is therefore facially defective. It is deficient on its face and it would be susceptible to a motion-to-dismiss."

Posted by: SMOD at April 11, 2023 05:05 PM (RHGPo)

172 TL;DR version: rules changes leaving decisions to setting designers rather than part of the core rule set are a god thing, actually.
Posted by: can of spam at April 11, 2023 05:02 PM (7oNMO)

Main thing that killed playing for me was the rules became very linear, making it almost impossible to use house rules without Rules Lawyers constantly arguing with the DM.

Hell, in the early 80's we had a whole sets of 'house rules' for both Magic, and Combat.

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 11, 2023 05:05 PM (oHd/0)

173 Breaking:

Pentagon secures against future intelligence leaks by installing ring doorbell.

The Bee.

Posted by: Archer at April 11, 2023 05:05 PM (gmo/4)

174 NO racist fighting against a different species--except everybody can attack White Men.

White Men are not allowed to defend.

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 05:05 PM (krQz2)

175 {132} Someone should make an RPG around this concept.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 04:57 PM (YIVH2)

We're soaking in it.

Posted by: Madge at April 11, 2023 05:06 PM (nRMeC)

176 153 Posted by: Azathoth at April 11, 2023 05:01 PM (wb1YC)

QFT quoted for Truth.....

had an abused glee ganger on that rampage across 5 game systems...

1) d ampersand d
2) top secret
3) star frontiers
4) paranoia
5) star trek

Posted by: sven at April 11, 2023 05:06 PM (Lzpvj)

177 Dragon Magazine had a one panel cartoon of monsters playing a game about playing in an office, cannot remember which issue. It was pretty early on.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 11, 2023 05:06 PM (0hOvj)

178 LOL, this is the first I have heard of this movie.

Posted by: Diesel Jones, Biologist at April 11, 2023 05:06 PM (Vu7A1)

179 White men are also not allowed to dodge or otherwise avoid the damage ~~that they deserve~~dealt.

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 05:06 PM (krQz2)

180 You marry a polish woman, have a baby that looks like a root vegetable, and beat them up instead.
Posted by: Warai-otoko at April 11, 2023 05:02 PM (9UlRk)

Polish women ain't no walk-over. In fact, they can be pretty damn fierce when provoked or drunk.

Posted by: mrp at April 11, 2023 05:06 PM (rj6Yv)

181 "Half-races mean that characters from differing races — and in some cases wildly differing races — can meet, fall in love, and procreate. "

This is the most delightfully optimistic account of Half-Orcs I've ever seen.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls - an election is simply a festival for the majority at April 11, 2023 05:06 PM (ppBhU)

182 You'd think they'd love to put Drow front and center in a movie. A Matriarchal society dedicated to evil and death with a preference toward androgyny. It basically sums up the leftist utopia of today.

I think Warhammer Drow would sell more tickets. http://dailycosplay.com/2015/May/22c.jpg

Posted by: 18-1 at April 11, 2023 05:07 PM (lc5cP)

183 Now: Dylan puts on the diaphanous princess dress while the dragon breaks out its +3 "lube of warming"
Posted by: 18-1 at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM (lc5cP)

Definitely don't look up Dragon Dildos unless you want to have a Pol Pot level of vengefulness against fat nerd girls.

Posted by: trev006 at April 11, 2023 05:07 PM (DTm0P)

184 163 Isn’t there an “Open D and D” ?
Posted by: SMOD at April 11, 2023 05:03 PM (RHGPo)

--

3rd edition rules were published under the OGL so large portions of the system were open, and many derivations off of that still exist, such as Pathfinder.

1st edition rules have been reverse engineered as OSRIC

Posted by: can of spam at April 11, 2023 05:07 PM (7oNMO)

185 The Left have a Strange New Respect for racial purity. Why I never would have guessed.

Say, can anyone think of a thing they have been consistent on for the last 25 years? I can't...

War - no
Police - no
Crime - no
Gays - no
Corruption - no
Dignity of the presidency - no

Maybe killing babies at the moment of birth but I swear they used to lie about that too

Posted by: ... at April 11, 2023 05:07 PM (BXxcV)

186 1) d ampersand d
2) top secret
3) star frontiers
4) paranoia
5) star trek
Posted by: sven at April 11, 2023 05:06 PM (Lzpvj)
---
You short on ampersands? I can lend you some:

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 05:07 PM (krQz2)

187 Freaks. All of them.

I could use the term "species" too.

Posted by: artisanal ette at April 11, 2023 05:07 PM (uQPen)

188 rules changes leaving decisions to setting designers rather than part of the core rule set are a god thing, actually.

Yes and no. Yes, in that it allows total creativity and control over your game, which is what I always did. No in that it hurts sales and popularity because there's no pre-made setting and campaign to just start playing in, you have to buy everything and make it yourself.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 11, 2023 05:08 PM (0hOvj)

189 You'd think they'd love to put Drow front and center in a movie. A Matriarchal society dedicated to evil and death with a preference toward androgyny. It basically sums up the leftist utopia of today.
Posted by: Flyguy at April 11, 2023 05:04 PM (VrVjC)
---
They were also A-OK with post-birth abortions, as they are only allowed to have 2 sons. If they give birth to a thirdson, that one is sacrificed to Lolth.

Drizzt's life was spared when he was about to be sacrificed because his middle brother killed the eldest brother at that exact moment, making Drizzt the new "secondson."

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 05:08 PM (YIVH2)

190 the good news is, everyone will keep the old books and character races anyway. so no big deal.

Posted by: SturmToddler at April 11, 2023 05:08 PM (nXhwP)

191 Kind of like "rodents of unusual size" from the Princess Bride.

Posted by: InZona at April 11, 2023 05:08 PM (6cWxW)

192 If she terminates the pregnancy is it an aborschtion?

Posted by: I denounce myself at April 11, 2023 05:08 PM (V6LRK)

193 I'm of German and Slavic ancestry. I usually just end up attacking myself.

Posted by: Archer at April 11, 2023 05:08 PM (gmo/4)

194 "Half-races mean that characters from differing races — and in some cases wildly differing races — can meet, fall in love, and procreate. "
---
Sounds racist!

Posted by: Rote Follower at April 11, 2023 05:09 PM (krQz2)

195 Well, I guess that settles it.

Insane, retarded people are now in charge of ALL the things.

Sigh.

Posted by: Sharkman at April 11, 2023 05:09 PM (GuhUk)

196 "He does [have to name it, via] the Sixth Amendment," Jarrett said. "[The indictment] is therefore facially defective. It is deficient on its face and it would be susceptible to a motion-to-dismiss."
Posted by: SMOD at April 11, 2023 05:05 PM (RHGPo)

except that somehow, the same Judge who oversaw two other Anti Trump type of cases, is now assigned this case.

What a co ink ki dink!

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 11, 2023 05:09 PM (oHd/0)

197 Leftist twinks corrupt everything they touch.

Posted by: mrp at April 11, 2023 05:09 PM (rj6Yv)

198 I have to admit, I certainly didn't have "Leftists come out against race mixing" on my bingo card for 2023.

Posted by: Azathoth at April 11, 2023 05:10 PM (wb1YC)

199 the good news is, everyone will keep the old books and character races anyway. so no big deal.
Posted by: SturmToddler at April 11, 2023 05:08 PM (nXhwP)
----
Yep. And anyone who wants to use the old, awesome rules can do so. PDFs are readily available.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 05:11 PM (YIVH2)

200 *invokes the "5 o'clock somewhere" clause*

L'chaim!
Confusion to our enemies!

Posted by: sock_rat_eez - we are being gaslighted 24/365 at April 11, 2023 05:11 PM (KGlll)

201 Hah!

nerds.

Posted by: Star Trek at April 11, 2023 05:11 PM (iziT8)

202 Time for a second look at Communism?

Posted by: Zombie Robert Byrd at April 11, 2023 05:11 PM (rj6Yv)

203 5 decades ago I made a half hearted attempt to get into D&D with some friends that played.

There is simply not enough weed to make that game worthwhile. It's hours upon hours of bitching and arguing about spells, die rolls and Doritos.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at April 11, 2023 05:12 PM (Q4IgG)

204 188 Yes and no. Yes, in that it allows total creativity and control over your game, which is what I always did. No in that it hurts sales and popularity because there's no pre-made setting and campaign to just start playing in, you have to buy everything and make it yourself.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 11, 2023 05:08 PM (0hOvj)

---

This wasn't to imply that Hasbro would publish their own settings, including a system "default" setting. I'm just saying core rules and setting decisions should be separate.

Ditching specific rules for half-elves and half-orcs in favor of "how to determine racial characteristics for descendants of two different races" still ALLOWS you to create half-elves and half-orcs, but also allows, for example, a dwarf/gnome hybrid which didn't exist under the old rules; it'd have to be a houserule.

Posted by: can of spam at April 11, 2023 05:12 PM (7oNMO)

205 156 Well, I had a pretty solid post written up describing a counterpoint on some of the rules changes, but the system is flagging it as spam (let's just assume I've already heard your joke on that, ok?).

TL;DR version: rules changes leaving decisions to setting designers rather than part of the core rule set are a god thing, actually.
Posted by: can of spam at April 11, 2023 05:02 PM (7oNMO)

If you have to homebrew everything, what is the point of their product exactly? Rulebooks exist so you don't have to write your own.

Posted by: Red Turban Someguy - The Republic is already dead! at April 11, 2023 05:12 PM (eYoxG)

206 I don't get this. We had a President who was half Kenyan Marxist and half Kansan airhead, and we have a VP now who's half upper-caste Indian.

Posted by: JEM at April 11, 2023 05:12 PM (8erNz)

207 " Fuck them right up the ass with a Sword of Wounding +4. "

Post of the year.

Posted by: Star Trek at April 11, 2023 05:13 PM (iziT8)

208 Mixed race is racist? Quick tell every single TV commercial on now. Every single couple is mixed race... unless they are homo or lesbo.

Posted by: Jukin the Deplorable a Clear and Present Danger at April 11, 2023 05:13 PM (17s+e)

209 These Lefties are such childish vandals of culture. The word "race" was used in the late 19th to early 20th century to describe nationality of different peoples of the same Caucasian race (I seem to recall G.K. Chesterton referring to the "Irish race" in one of his books).

The Roman empire was pretty diverse in its makeup. I don't think Romans cared about skin color (there were lots of swarthy folks ringing the Mediterranean), but they did pay attention to place of birth and religion.

Posted by: Retired Buckeye Cop is now an engineer at April 11, 2023 05:13 PM (pJWtt)

210 Ditching specific rules for half-elves and half-orcs in favor of "how to determine racial characteristics for descendants of two different races" still ALLOWS you to create half-elves and half-orcs, but also allows, for example, a dwarf/gnome hybrid which didn't exist under the old rules; it'd have to be a houserule.
Posted by: can of spam at April 11, 2023 05:12 PM (7oNMO)

Arduin Grimoire... Half DEMONS... good times.

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 11, 2023 05:13 PM (oHd/0)

211 My oldest son gets together with a few of his buddies and they play D& D with the old 80s books and maps that belonged to his father. I think it's great. They do everything on paper and use the old figurines and everything.

No pot smoking though. A couple of them can be drug tested at their place Of employment.

Posted by: nurse ratched at April 11, 2023 05:13 PM (NBGQS)

212 They later clarified -- or clarilied, amirite? -- that they were not removing the concept of half-species altogther, but just wanted to change the terminology to something more PC, like "Children of Different Humanoid Kinds."
---
I actually guessed this would probably be the case.

"Half" is "racist" because people have used it as an epithet.

Then just call it "Mixed species".

The ironic thing is that a "species" is defined by what it can mate with. So, they're exactly stupid.

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 05:14 PM (krQz2)

213 207 " Fuck them right up the ass with a Sword of Wounding +4. "

Post of the year.
Posted by: Star Trek at April 11, 2023 05:13 PM (iziT

Old and Busted: Vorpal Sword which takes your head.
New Hotness: Rectal Sword...

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 11, 2023 05:15 PM (oHd/0)

214 Nah they need a clue beaten into them.

A Mace of Maiming +4 vs Stupidity might work.

Posted by: Anna Puma at April 11, 2023 05:15 PM (gWRQ1)

215
What of Centaurs, Minotaurs, and Girffins?

Posted by: Soothsayer, the HQ's Most Respected Commenter at April 11, 2023 05:15 PM (ILtSa)

216 Redneck Rampage is still my all time favorite video game.

Fun, goofy and winnable, with the best music, too (Mojo Nixon).

Posted by: Sharkman at April 11, 2023 05:15 PM (GuhUk)

217 Pop star Lizzo shares nude selfie to ‘change the conversation about beauty standards’

https://bit.ly/3o7E3nf
-
I'm pretty sure she's half human, half blimp. Maybe 1/4 human, 3/4 blimp.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? at April 11, 2023 05:15 PM (FVME7)

218
Griffins

Posted by: Soothsayer, the HQ's Most Respected Commenter at April 11, 2023 05:15 PM (ILtSa)

219 Despite playing and owning the original D&D set and playing through the AD&D first and second editions back in the day, the fact that the left is desecrating a corpse in creativity leaves me unbothered. Just as pro sports bent a knee as well as most modern entertainment. Even a non-woke Indy movie would most likely suck just like the 4th one did. Ditto for Star Whores or Star Dreck.

Sorry for the fans but wargaming is probably a better pursuit right now for this time and place than fantasy gaming. If you use historical ones, at least you will know the placenames of the places you will be conscripted to go and fight.

Posted by: whig at April 11, 2023 05:15 PM (bVz3B)

220 Dwarf is problematic. Like midgets.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 11, 2023 05:15 PM (WzJYQ)

221 Livin' and lovin' my half-race life!

Posted by: Heinrich Von O'Sullivan at April 11, 2023 05:15 PM (VsUo2)

222 The cool thing about progress is it never ends.

Posted by: Max Power at April 11, 2023 05:16 PM (Hucnr)

223 They should make a Mulvaney character who is so overpowered that zhe wins automatically. Just walks in and splatters every player with flesh-eating monkeypox.

And they could pay Mulvaney $100b for likeness rights and muh justicez, and get D&D named the Official Strategy Game of the US Armed Forces by the Joint Chiefs of Staff's Historic First Atomic Tranny Dogboy Chairman.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 05:16 PM (oINRc)

224 So Spock will get cancelled next.

Posted by: Anna Puma at April 11, 2023 05:16 PM (gWRQ1)

225 only PureBloods™ will be tolerated here

Posted by: joe fingerblaster at April 11, 2023 05:16 PM (3TalN)

226 Wolf Elves?

Wendy and Richard Pini from the great ElfQuest comics should sue for plagarism.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:17 PM (eoQWY)

227 the good news is, everyone will keep the old books and character races anyway. so no big deal.

***

That's what Wzards of the Coast and Hasbro don't seem to understand and why all of this cash grab flexing was so retarded. Especially in a market where there's been dozens of options for decades. From a marketing standpoint, the OGL reversal was the equivalent of catching your scrotum in your pants zipper. And then jumping up and down.

All of this stuff escaped into the wild decades ago. Hell, I I have a massive amount of print and pdf copies of most of what TSR published including reprints and all of the books going back to the original white box. I'm hardly alone in all of this and anything I don't have I can guarantee you I can find online somewhere.

Posted by: Azathoth at April 11, 2023 05:18 PM (wb1YC)

228 Sorry for the fans but wargaming is probably a better pursuit right now for this time and place than fantasy gaming. If you use historical ones, at least you will know the placenames of the places you will be conscripted to go and fight.
Posted by: whig at April 11, 2023 05:15 PM (bVz3B)

Damn, wonder if I still have that set of 'Lame Duck Troopers' rules we came up with...

Used Howard the Duck in Space Armor Miniatures... probably impossible to find now.

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 11, 2023 05:18 PM (oHd/0)

229 So a wolf elf is a half-wolf/ half-elf?

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 11, 2023 05:18 PM (WzJYQ)

230 Fuck off, fatzzo. My standards of beauty are mine. Yours are yours. Find someone who finds you beautiful and shut your fat stupid mouth.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at April 11, 2023 05:18 PM (9UlRk)

231 Everything around Cultural Marxism depends on race, probably why they even use it on fiction stories

Posted by: Skip at April 11, 2023 05:18 PM (xhxe8)

232 "He does [have to name it, via] the Sixth Amendment," Jarrett said. "[The indictment] is therefore facially defective. It is deficient on its face and it would be susceptible to a motion-to-dismiss."
Posted by: SMOD at April 11, 2023 05:05 PM

Sounds like towards the end of WWII in Germany.....Am I permitted to know what the charges are against me? BLAM!!!!!

Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at April 11, 2023 05:18 PM (ncXxy)

233 The currently-being-tested adjustments, as seen in the publisher's official materials, will apparently see the existence of Half-species replaced with a new system known as "Children of Different Humanoid Kinds"
---
What if I want to play a mixed character but not a child?!

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 05:19 PM (krQz2)

234 Sounds like towards the end of WWII in Germany.....Am I permitted to know what the charges are against me? BLAM!!!!!
Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at April 11, 2023 05:18 PM (ncXxy)
---
DC is cribbing from Kafka these days.

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 05:19 PM (krQz2)

235 Never was big into D&D.
My current game of choice is Twilight Struggle, usually against the computer.
Posted by: PabloD at April 11, 2023 04:41 PM (ChmlL)

hell I only wanted to live through the Cold War once, not every day.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:19 PM (eoQWY)

236 > Redneck Rampage is still my all time favorite video game.
___________

Carmageddon.

I'm a bad father. Let the kids play it when they were pre-teens. Same with the original Unreal Tournament. We'd have LAN parties with the 3 of us against all comers on our hosted server.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (Q4IgG)

237 I'm hoping for one of those games where if the player dies in the game he dies in real life. Dungeons and Trannies would be good.

Posted by: Smell the Glove at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (+MtKE)

238 "Half" is "racist" because people have used it as an epithet.

-
"Half assed" is definitely racist.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (FVME7)

239 224 So Spock will get cancelled next.

Posted by: Anna Puma at April 11, 2023 05:16 PM (gWRQ1)

Logical. I estimate the odds at 99.99%.

Posted by: Spock at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (SYTee)

240 Ditching specific rules for half-elves and half-orcs in favor of "how to determine racial characteristics for descendants of two different races" still ALLOWS you to create half-elves and half-orcs, but also allows, for example, a dwarf/gnome hybrid which didn't exist under the old rules; it'd have to be a houserule.
Posted by: can of spam at April 11, 2023 05:12 PM (7oNMO)

This works until that one guy min/maxes a minotaur-halfling and breaks both the system and his fellow players minds.

Posted by: Flyguy at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (VrVjC)

241 Pop star Lizzo shares nude selfie to ‘change the conversation about beauty standards’

***

Best comment to this article on Twitter:

"The last time I saw something like that Carrie Fisher was chained to it."

Posted by: Azathoth at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (wb1YC)

242 So a wolf elf is a half-wolf/ half-elf?

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 11, 2023 05:18 PM (WzJYQ)
---
NO WOLF FOR YOU!!

Posted by: Gary Gygax at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (krQz2)

243 >>Pop star Lizzo shares nude selfie to ‘change the conversation about beauty standards’

Do you have one in White?

Posted by: Capt. Ahab at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (SIRiz)

244 225 only PureBloods™ will be tolerated here
Posted by: joe fingerblaster at April 11, 2023 05:16 PM (3TalN)

LOL, just started playing Crusader Kings 3 recently.. and one trait you can get?

PureBlood... needless to say I use a cheat code to always give that one to my charcters.

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (oHd/0)

245 Lemonade?
Please!
How deliteful!

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (WzJYQ)

246 just to comment on the old thread, wow...is this the first time Biden lied about a (cough cough afghan withdrawal) military assessment?

Posted by: sockamster, gator at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (MLrvz)

247 I guess "octoroon" and "quadroon" are right out.

Posted by: a.moron at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (tu3iY)

248 Pop star Lizzo shares nude selfie to ‘change the conversation about beauty standards’
---
Yeeeeeahh...

That's not what that did.....

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 05:21 PM (krQz2)

249 242 So a wolf elf is a half-wolf/ half-elf?

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 11, 2023 05:18 PM (WzJYQ)
---
NO WOLF FOR YOU!!
Posted by: Gary Gygax at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (krQz2)

/points to the Furry Convention next door.

Posted by: Dave Arnson at April 11, 2023 05:21 PM (oHd/0)

250 Ron Weasley had no problems getting some "Muggle Fuggle," if you know what I mean and I think you do.

Posted by: Harry Potter & The Chamber of Secretions at April 11, 2023 05:21 PM (VsUo2)

251 Honestly D and D was/maybe still will get bigger, but not because of anything WoTC did. They had the opportunity to be selling the same thing that a lots of really creative people were using online. The combination of Youtube and twitch being able to broadcast a 2 hour episode of Critical Roll, and the creativity of many D &D shows coupled with lots of Down time during Covid.

This droping half Orc /Half Elf will be back in the next book. More sales for Volo's extra special guide to Monsters. But WoTC/Hasbo needs to understand they had a good game in 5e, not too clunky like 4e, and were able to capitalize on streamers/youtube creators. The One Licensing
Push back was a warning, evidently they did not listen.

Posted by: Picric at April 11, 2023 05:21 PM (HzuMl)

252 If Hasbeen/Wokesters of the Coast want to fail, let them.

Posted by: Grumpy and Recalcitrant at April 11, 2023 04:40 PM

Unless they start fvcking around with Magic the Gathering card game, they will be 100% fine. If they chose to mess up that game with woke garbage then they will die.
Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at April 11, 2023 04:43 PM (ncXxy)

Already done from the little I hear - I get echos of the uproar but yes Magic is being cleansed.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:21 PM (eoQWY)

253 It would be tough to do away with haflings since they're so hobbit-forming.

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at April 11, 2023 05:22 PM (N3zMI)

254 She can change the conversation about alternative emetics.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 05:22 PM (oINRc)

255 The covid emergency is officially over.

No more EUA, right FDA?

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 11, 2023 05:22 PM (WzJYQ)

256 Eff them. I LOVED D&D back in the day, grew up playing it, a 1st edition baby all the way. Screw WOTC for destroying this game.

Once TSR was gone, it stopped being D&D/AD&D (all IMHO).

Posted by: acethepug at April 11, 2023 05:23 PM (+jAqb)

257
Half races are racist.

So, okay. Beal & Loki >>>>>>>>> Obama

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 11, 2023 05:23 PM (x0n13)

258 It would be tough to do away with haflings since they're so hobbit-forming.[/i

Stick that in your pipe and smoke it!

Posted by: Gandalf at April 11, 2023 05:23 PM (lc5cP)

259 the good news is, everyone will keep the old books and character races anyway. so no big deal.

Posted by: SturmToddler at April 11, 2023 05:08 PM (nXhwP)

Fahrenheit 451

Posted by: ... at April 11, 2023 05:23 PM (BXxcV)

260 Probably, although the skills system in 2d edition was not bad and you could do interesting things with Player's Options Skills and Powers.

You knew the hill was downward when they removed the assassin class.
Posted by: sven at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (Lzpvj)

I remember in College our DM had the assassin's hands cut off (he was incognito) because he wasn't killing enough people.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:23 PM (eoQWY)

261 Whole pallets of unused Magic cards found in landfills points to weakness there.

Posted by: Anna Puma at April 11, 2023 05:24 PM (gWRQ1)

262 Who ever heard of such behavior? Even amongst the colored? Or, mulattos, maybe - I suspect some miscegnation in their heritage. How else you going to explain it?

Posted by: Homer Stokes at April 11, 2023 05:24 PM (gmo/4)

263 What happened to halflings? Are they a "half" race or not?
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 04:44 PM (YIVH2)

They are legally distinct from hobbits, that's all we are saying about that.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:24 PM (eoQWY)

264 259 the good news is, everyone will keep the old books and character races anyway. so no big deal.

Posted by: SturmToddler at April 11, 2023 05:08 PM (nXhwP)

Fahrenheit 451
Posted by: ... at April 11, 2023 05:23 PM (BXxcV)

"Kiss my Heinrich Heine!"

- - Goe-balls (had no balls at all)

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 11, 2023 05:24 PM (x0n13)

265 I remember in College our DM had the assassin's hands cut off (he was incognito) because he wasn't killing enough people.
Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:23 PM (eoQWY)

One campaign we all took Semi Humanoid Monsters... and attacked the City State of the Invincible Overlord.

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 11, 2023 05:25 PM (oHd/0)

266

Uh...fault of the Nazgul?

Posted by: Gandalf at April 11, 2023 05:25 PM (lc5cP)

267 Gary Gygax weeps

Posted by: mrs. allardyce at April 11, 2023 05:26 PM (H/3l8)

268 Lol. So Alvin Bragg is taking time off from trying to find his feet and suing Jim Jordan to stop Congressional "interfering".

Ok....

Posted by: Azathoth at April 11, 2023 05:26 PM (wb1YC)

269 266

Uh...fault of the Nazgul?
Posted by: Gandalf at April 11, 2023 05:25 PM (lc5cP)

Calling us Black Riders is downright Racist!

Posted by: King of the Nazgul at April 11, 2023 05:26 PM (oHd/0)

270 Once TSR was gone, it stopped being D&D/AD&D (all IMHO).
Posted by: acethepug at April 11, 2023 05:23 PM (+jAqb)
---
So is it "Gay Wizards of the Coast" or "Wizards of the Gay Coast"?

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 05:26 PM (krQz2)

271 Playing D-n-D, drinking Bud Light, asking other players about their colors and preferred pronouns because that's the way the die rolled. Bizarro world.

Posted by: mrp at April 11, 2023 05:27 PM (rj6Yv)

272 Ron Weasley had no problems getting some "Muggle Fuggle," if you know what I mean and I think you do.
Posted by: Harry Potter & The Chamber of Secretions

Of course. Hoppy Beer.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 11, 2023 05:27 PM (jzzG8)

273 Only Polly Purebred will be tolerated.

Posted by: Underdog at April 11, 2023 05:27 PM (63Dwl)

274 Posted by: Fuck "growing up" at April 11, 2023 04:54 PM

Oh, look- a former poster under yet another nic change.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 11, 2023 04:59 PM (loYas)

You are not nearly as smart as you think you are. And this isn't the first time you've shown it.

Posted by: Trader Vics at April 11, 2023 05:28 PM (ojZfe)

275 Children of Different Humanoid Kinds

Aren't there non-humanoid races in DnD that get together? Birds, frogs, turtles, and bunnies are the ones that come to mind. Although a cross between a turtle and a hare would be hilarious.

"I'm gonna win this race! No, I want to take a nap! I'M GONNA WIN THIS RACE!"
Posted by: pookysgirl, snickering just thinking about it at April 11, 2023 04:52 PM (dtlDP)

There is an RPG out there where you play various talking animals in a charming village working out how to make biscuits for next weeks tea. Its like a sanitized Beatrix Potter, which is a lot more rough and tumble than people remember.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:28 PM (eoQWY)

276 Bragg accused Jordan and the committee of launching an “intimidation, retaliation, and obstruction” campaign against a state prosecution process in violation of federalism. The subpoena, the lawsuit said, was an “unprecedently brazen and unconstitutional attack by members of Congress.”

***

It's a wonder they don't send somebody around twice a week to water this dude.

Posted by: Azathoth at April 11, 2023 05:28 PM (wb1YC)

277 273 Only Polly Purebred will be tolerated.
Posted by: Underdog at April 11, 2023 05:27 PM (63Dwl)

Uh... isn't she only Half Dog?

Posted by: Romeo13 at April 11, 2023 05:28 PM (oHd/0)

278 I care about D&D like I care about Bud Light. If the wokies stayed in their lane and stfu, they can have their cheap, piss-tasting beer and fantasy card games.

Posted by: SMFH at April 11, 2023 05:28 PM (L7Tc9)

279 Maybe I should have gotten into D&D. But by 13, I was have too much fun chasing girls.

They were the ultimate cause of my academic and sports downfall.

Posted by: Archer at April 11, 2023 05:28 PM (gmo/4)

280 The Magicians' Alliance >>>> Wizards of the Coast

We demand to be taken seriously.

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at April 11, 2023 05:28 PM (N3zMI)

281 If half races are racist, does that make me racist if I am half white half Asian? Is Halfrican racist?

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 11, 2023 05:29 PM (WzJYQ)

282 Advanced Dungeons and Dragons version 1 is all I've ever played and all I ever will. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

Posted by: SFGoth at April 11, 2023 05:30 PM (KAi1n)

283 Half is math.

Math is racist.

Ergo half is racist.

Posted by: the dandy at April 11, 2023 05:30 PM (JqGnL)

284 Already done from the little I hear - I get echos of the uproar but yes Magic is being cleansed.
Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:21 PM (eoQWY)

Then what the hell will I do with this expensive wand I just bought?

Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at April 11, 2023 05:30 PM (BdMk6)

285 I have mixed feelings on the complete Woke Failure of this film, because it's a decent movie and, just on its own merits, it deserves better.
---
So do I. My son and I enjoyed that movie quite a bit.

We even got over the Only-girls-can-fight thing pretty quickly.

Posted by: Axeman at April 11, 2023 05:30 PM (krQz2)

286 They just didn't want to admit that the the most likely way to get half-orcs is that a savage orc raiding party rapes all the human women in the settlement the orcs just slaughtered and burned.

Because the Left thinks orcs are black or something.

... though given how all in the Left is on "reparations" you'd think they think that is all justice-y and such.

Posted by: FeatherBlade at April 11, 2023 05:30 PM (ou9hh)

287 I used to play a dwarf that smelled so bad it could stun.

So, Gamma World, then?

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at April 11, 2023 05:30 PM (EXyHK)

288 Lol. So Alvin Bragg is taking time off from trying to find his feet and suing Jim Jordan to stop Congressional "interfering".

Ok....
Posted by: Azathoth at April 11, 2023 05:26 PM (wb1YC)

Suing Jim Jordan over what? His indictments, his "case"? What's the "case"? Does the "case" have merit? Hmm .. one would think that the last thing Alvin would want is scrutiny of his "case" by the federal judiciary.

Posted by: mrp at April 11, 2023 05:31 PM (rj6Yv)

289 Half is math.

Math is racist.

Ergo half is racist.

Posted by: the dandy at April 11, 2023 05:30 PM (JqGnL)

ooooowheee! That some fine ciphering, there, boy!

- Uncle Jed

Posted by: Archer at April 11, 2023 05:31 PM (gmo/4)

290 Pardon me, stewardess, I speak Black Speech.

Posted by: Barbara Bilingsly(Tolkien Fan) at April 11, 2023 05:32 PM (SYTee)

291 WOTC went full Gollum over OGL.

Reap what you sowed you greedy goblins.

Posted by: Anna Puma at April 11, 2023 05:33 PM (gWRQ1)

292 I wonder if part of D&D's steep decline in ticket sales is due to the speed with which movies seem to be leaving theaters now. I thought about seeing D&D this past weekend and the theater I was considering had already reduced John Wick 4 to a single screening after all of 3 weeks. Guess I'll wait for streaming if this is how movies are going to go now.

Posted by: Octochicken at April 11, 2023 05:33 PM (oCS0o)

293 In D&D, no half-breeds are allowed

Posted by: PG at April 11, 2023 05:33 PM (84jHt)

294 When will dictionaries stop defining all of these horrible words like blind, woman and man?

When you ban words and thoughts, how will we communicate accurately?

Pretty soon no one will fee safe saying anything.

We will just grunt and nod.

Posted by: Czech Chick at April 11, 2023 05:33 PM (6Tc2R)

295 286 Posted by: FeatherBlade at April 11, 2023 05:30 PM (ou9hh)

I did a gag on a player who wanted to play a 1/2 Orc Paladin....

told him he was raised by his single-father human rape survivor who had endured an orcish priestess having her way with him while herding unicorns....

Guy's name was Mortimer J Beauretard, and he was one of the best comedy characters I ever DM'd.

Posted by: sven at April 11, 2023 05:34 PM (Lzpvj)

296 Yep. And anyone who wants to use the old, awesome rules can do so. PDFs are readily available.
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at April 11, 2023 05:11 PM (YIVH2)

Probably still in a trunk or box in the garage, the original rules in the small books and ADnD

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:34 PM (eoQWY)

297 "WOTC went full Gollum over OGL."

The long mustache is against the wall.

Posted by: Star Trek at April 11, 2023 05:34 PM (iziT8)

298 Everyone is getting into increasing customer base or support by alienating one or both, it seems.

What a stunning tactic, it's one that's been proven effective over time.

Posted by: irongrampa at April 11, 2023 05:34 PM (KATBx)

299
So Alvin Bragg is taking time off from trying to find his feet and suing Jim Jordan to stop Congressional "interfering".

Ok....

Posted by: Azathoth at April 11, 2023 05:26 PM

Apparently Bragg is getting all kinds of hate and threats against himself. Okay, not cool... perhaps.

But... if you could go back in time and threaten Adolf H and make him fear for his life and save your family from a rail trip to Treblinka, would you?

A time for choosing.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at April 11, 2023 05:34 PM (enJYY)

300 I'm of German and Slavic ancestry. I usually just end up attacking myself.

Posted by: Archer at April 11, 2023 05:08 PM (gmo/4)

German - Irish - English - Swedish.

About a thousand or more years of internal conflict in there.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:35 PM (eoQWY)

301 And anyone who wants to use the old, awesome rules can do so. PDFs are readily available.

And there are a ton of clones out there, too. As well as a ton of house-rule-filled semi-clones.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at April 11, 2023 05:36 PM (EXyHK)

302 Czech Chick

Just saw in Wally World the dumbest saying on a t-shirt - "We all communicate differently."

Posted by: Anna Puma at April 11, 2023 05:36 PM (gWRQ1)

303 Sad to say I go all the way back to Gary Gygax's three booklet box set. What I really liked was a sort of related booklet called Swords and Spells, which was a ruleset for large scale battles of armies. I had hundreds of hand painted lead figurines.

But I gave up all that stuff last year -- when I was 28, because now I'm 29.

Posted by: tommylotto at April 11, 2023 05:36 PM (6QQM8)

304 We will just grunt and nod.
Posted by: Czech Chick at April 11, 2023 05:33 PM (6Tc2R)

Heh. You just reminded me of a joke about marines.

Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at April 11, 2023 05:36 PM (BdMk6)

305 "We will just grunt and nod. "

I'm already there. But that's just plain misanthropy.

Posted by: Star Trek at April 11, 2023 05:36 PM (iziT8)

306 "The world of fictitious make-believe is a prime target for the trans/perv/woke crowd. It's right in their wheelhouse."

On the plus side, if another person's character does something really objectionable to yours you ~can~ kill the offender and no one bats an eye!

Posted by: FeatherBlade at April 11, 2023 05:36 PM (ou9hh)

307 LOL, just started playing Crusader Kings 3 recently.. and one trait you can get?

PureBlood... needless to say I use a cheat code to always give that one to my charcters.
Posted by: Romeo13 at April 11, 2023 05:20 PM (oHd/0)

In CK2 you could turn your bloodline into horses and have horse rulers. Not sure if that can be done in CK3

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:37 PM (eoQWY)

308 "We will just grunt and nod. "

Micro-aggressions! Micro-aggressions!!!!

REEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher at April 11, 2023 05:37 PM (N3zMI)

309 Once TSR was gone, it stopped being D&D/AD&D (all IMHO).
Posted by: acethepug at April 11, 2023 05:23 PM

Gary Gygex is spinning in his grave rolling multiple D100's.

Posted by: Mister Scott (Formerly GWS) at April 11, 2023 05:37 PM (ncXxy)

310 Libs of TikTok@libsoftiktok
A “family-friendly” pride event this weekend in Florida featured a dildo ring toss game for kids.
A school principal sits on the board of the organization that hosted the dildo ring toss booth.

-
I assume the name of the game is Cockring.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? at April 11, 2023 05:38 PM (FVME7)

311 I can't believe they took an episode of Community from us. You run through the series and realize you need more. I wonder the forbidden episode's on a dvd set or something

Posted by: sockamster, gator at April 11, 2023 05:38 PM (MLrvz)

312 Alvin Bragg is taking time off from trying to find his feet and suing Jim Jordan to stop Congressional "interfering".

//////

what a legal enormity

Posted by: sockamster, gator at April 11, 2023 05:39 PM (MLrvz)

313 Alvin Bragg is the Neal DeGrase Tyson of the legal community.

Posted by: Anna Puma at April 11, 2023 05:40 PM (gWRQ1)

314 NERDS!!

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at April 11, 2023 05:40 PM (yQpMk)

315 The Redneck Rampage immortality/unlimited ammo code is "RDElvis".

Naturally.

Posted by: Sharkman at April 11, 2023 05:40 PM (GuhUk)

316 I'm of German and Slavic ancestry. I usually just end up attacking myself.

Posted by: Archer

Self abuse?!!!

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? at April 11, 2023 05:41 PM (FVME7)

317 If Gygax is rolling a Zocchi D100, that will take awhile to stop rolling.

Posted by: Anna Puma at April 11, 2023 05:42 PM (gWRQ1)

318
To me, the last time that Alvin Bragg set the fork down and pushed the plate away Manhattan was in an Ice Age.

Posted by: Divide by Zero at April 11, 2023 05:42 PM (enJYY)

319 So a wolf elf is a half-wolf/ half-elf?
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at April 11, 2023 05:18 PM (WzJYQ)

In the Elfquest story, you follow the Wolfriders a clan of Elves who live in a forest bonded to a pack of wolves. 10 generations back their founder shapeshifted into a wolf form to feed the tribe - elves had arrived from another world and lost their tech and were having troubles adjusting and in wolf form had a half wolf kid who became Chief. Being part of the world he was better suited for living here, and also mortal though long lived. Eventually the tribe all became touched with wolf blood.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:43 PM (eoQWY)

320 Ok guys. This thread is so dorky that Ace needs to put a flaming pocket protector up top.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at April 11, 2023 05:45 PM (oINRc)

321 Interesting 30 minute video on why Hitler started WWII. Includes many concepts discussed here.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=PQGMjDQ-TJ8&t=940s

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? at April 11, 2023 05:46 PM (FVME7)

322 nood TX pardon

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at April 11, 2023 05:46 PM (Vwz3I)

323 Because the Left thinks orcs are black or something.

... though given how all in the Left is on "reparations" you'd think they think that is all justice-y and such.
Posted by: FeatherBlade at April 11, 2023 05:30 PM (ou9hh)

Funny how when someone creates an evil, uncouth race the liberals think 'black!'

In Guild Wars 2 MMO there is a blind, mole race who all appear to be communists. They even have a Moletariat.

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:47 PM (eoQWY)

324 I remember in College our DM had the assassin's hands cut off (he was incognito) because he wasn't killing enough people.
Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:23 PM (eoQWY)

One campaign we all took Semi Humanoid Monsters... and attacked the City State of the Invincible Overlord.
Posted by: Romeo13 at April 11, 2023 05:25 PM (oHd/0)

If he's so invincible, why does he just rule a pukey city-state?

Posted by: Oldcat at April 11, 2023 05:50 PM (eoQWY)

325 To me, the last time that Alvin Bragg set the fork down and pushed the plate away Manhattan was in an Ice Age.

Posted by: Divide by Zero

Technically, duh Erf has been in an interglacial period in the Quaternary Ice Age that started about 2 million years ago, for about 11K years. Duh Erf's natural state being a ball of ice. 12K years ago the CO2 level was so low almost all plantlife, and thus all life, was very close to extinction.

But I do get your point about Alvin "Porkins" Bragg.

Posted by: Sharkman at April 11, 2023 05:50 PM (GuhUk)

326 We saw D&D the day before yesterday.

Both the lovely and perceptive Mrs naturalfake and I enjoyed the movie a lot. And would definitely be in for D&D2 only that does not appear it will happen cuz pitiful BO.(box office)

Since the dumbasses who made D&D made sure they described and advertised it in a way that made sure to minimize their own BO. I guess I don't care.

The only thing that might save this is if Hasbro made sure it hit every streaming service possible for a very low and/or free price.

But, again, they shot themselves in the head, so what're you gonna do?

Posted by: naturalfake at April 11, 2023 05:52 PM (RJQ8g)

327 313 Alvin Bragg is the Neal DeGrase Tyson of the legal community.
Posted by: Anna Puma at April 11, 2023 05:40 PM (gWRQ1)

Do you even Law, bro?

Posted by: Simple Stevo at April 11, 2023 06:01 PM (R5JlW)

328 I'm pretty sure the hardcore gaming nerds are still using their rule books from back in the 80s (you know when it was a Satanic Plot) and they're probably picking and choosing what they want to use from the newer stuff while ignoring the bullshit woke stuff. If it's anything like Advanced Squad Leader, there's a buttload of user created aftermarket stuff (yeah my nerd creds are strong)

Posted by: Stacy0311 at April 11, 2023 06:22 PM (VfLe7)

329 ~ By the way, they're also removing the word "Race" from the game, because I guess the word "race" is itself racist. They're replacing that word with "Species," which... yeah doesn't sound like a word that people in a pre-industrial society would use.

====
No clearer evidence that:
a. they are eating their own ,first in word, then in deed.
b. this whole woke mess the work of the spiritual powers that hide in darkness.

Posted by: Paul in Texas at April 11, 2023 06:30 PM (EG5bh)

330 Is my daughter white, or black?

Depends on whether she votes for Biden.

Posted by: PG at April 11, 2023 06:32 PM (84jHt)

331 There is a serious movement to change the drow elves from black to dark purple, because Racism.

The theory goes that certain races from D&D were "coded as black", and "everyone knew" that drow (and orcs) really represent black people. It's a dog whistle that only racists and liberals can hear, apparently.

It's problematic for the drow to be black because people might think real people with African ancestry live in underground caves, tending mushroom farms and having infrared vision. Well, that might not be the reason, I can't claim I really understand it.

With a quick Google search I found this: In some LARP groups the rules are now that you can't make your skin black when playing a Drow, because Blackface. You also can't make your skin black if portraying a Shadow or any other black creature.

https://bit.ly/3KRNwYU

I thought the problem with blackface is that it was used for mocking black-skinned folks. Now I guess it can't be used for any purpose at all because it will remind people of mocking black-skinned folks.

Posted by: mr_jack at April 11, 2023 07:13 PM (LNPSJ)

332 I will say that the old D&D rules had an overly-simplistic view of reality in one way: all orcs were "evil", all drow were "evil", full stop.

The old rules were so crazy that there was a language called "Neutral Evil" that Neutral Evil people and monsters could speak, and so on for all the "alignments". This was an evolution of the original "three books" D&D rules, which said there were three alignments (Chaotic, Neutral, Lawful) and those three had languages. When AD&D introduced the 3x3 matrix (Chaotic, Neutral, and Lawful combined with Evil, Neutral, and Good) they extended this crazy languages idea.

https://bit.ly/3GAMbDt

It should be possible to have a story of an orc who was raised separate from the orc tribes and has the same values as the human family that raised him. It should be possible to have a story of a drow who flees the caverns, being tired of everyone scheming and poisoning everyone else, and converting to Thor worship or whatever and becoming good.

And while I'm fine with "hack-and-slash" gaming if that's what you like, I think it would be an improvement if all players didn't murder every goblin they meet on sight, because "all goblins are Evil."

Posted by: mr_jack at April 11, 2023 07:24 PM (LNPSJ)

333 Here's the thing: D&D is not what you remember. It's long since been unmoored from its sword & sorcery origins and most current players are aping the isekai anime they consume by the dumpster load. I doubt any of the current players would even notice the loss of half-elves and half-orcs; they're playing sexy dragonkin and catgirl tabaxi and wtfever other furry-inspired thing TikTok has injected into their brains.

The movie was never going to do well. Despite "nerd culture" there actually aren't that many people interested in watching a movie that's just D&D in-jokes.

Posted by: Daniel Ream at April 11, 2023 07:37 PM (KTmDq)

334 Half-Elfs were my favorite race. I could always play them so well. Attributes of Human and Elves, but leveled out quicker. Played them as a Fighter-Magic User. Fellow players dumped on my choice, but I was pretty damn useful in a Campaign. Sigh. Wish I knew then what I know now back in the 80s.

Posted by: The Guy at April 11, 2023 07:37 PM (4cEdi)

335 So whats Tannis Half-elven new last name?

Posted by: hurricane567 at April 11, 2023 08:06 PM (U66GC)

336 I'm making $100 an hour working from home. i was greatly surprised at the same time as my neighbour advised me she changed into averaging $100 however I see the way it works now. I experience mass freedom now that I'm my non-public boss.
I highly recommend everyone to apply… www.Payathome7.com

Posted by: www.Payathome7.com at April 11, 2023 11:58 PM (qEHbV)

337 The concept of race as it was defined in the 16 century would have been known to pre industrial peoples.

"race (n.2)
[people of common descent] 1560s, "people descended from a common ancestor, class of persons allied by common ancestry," from French race, earlier razza "race, breed, lineage, family" (16c.)"
https://www.etymonline.com/word/race

However the modern meaning of race is based on the evolutionary movements of the 19th century and would be unknown to pre-industrial peoples.

Posted by: Fred4D at April 12, 2023 07:30 AM (y8M19)

338 D&D is for fags. Real men play Warhammer RPG version 2.

Posted by: rechill at April 12, 2023 10:05 AM (Q1LXu)

339 For what it's worth, my family went to see Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves and greatly enjoyed it.

The black paladin was deliciously annoying and ridiculously overpowered.

Posted by: Rick67 at April 12, 2023 12:48 PM (aG9PT)

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