Mid-Morning Art Thread

The Paralytic
Jean-Baptiste Greuze

Posted by: CBD at 09:30 AM

Comments

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1 first

Posted by: blaster at December 05, 2022 09:29 AM (pwExq)

2 I don't see his granddaughter Navy in that picture.

Posted by: fd at December 05, 2022 09:29 AM (sn5EN)

3 maskless? Is this allowed?

Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 05, 2022 09:30 AM (YuWXU)

4 I didn't know that the WH Press Secretary was also an artist.

Posted by: blaster at December 05, 2022 09:30 AM (pwExq)

5 the dog in the lower right hand corner is named "Meghan"

Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 05, 2022 09:30 AM (YuWXU)

6 Nice detail; and the dog, no doubt, is included to display loyalty?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at December 05, 2022 09:31 AM (J2vNu)

7 Did he get better?

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at December 05, 2022 09:31 AM (AXxfu)

8 Guy is dying and dog just wants a treat

Very well done and detailed

Posted by: Skip's phone at December 05, 2022 09:31 AM (iTmlc)

9 "I have to clean up his shit?"

Posted by: kneeling boy at December 05, 2022 09:32 AM (MTcmR)

10 Everybody and their dog was there.

Posted by: huerfano at December 05, 2022 09:32 AM (dTFZY)

11 Just wave that golden ticket to the Wonka factory under his nose, then you'll see how paralyzed he is.

Posted by: Blanco Basura - moronhorde.com - Email for morons. at December 05, 2022 09:32 AM (Bd6X8)

12 Oddly enough, I find this painting moving.

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 09:33 AM (ykeLU)

13 This is sad.
Would not hang... even if it does have a dog.

Posted by: redridinghood at December 05, 2022 09:33 AM (NpAcC)

14 Stand up for us Pierre

--Joe Biden

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at December 05, 2022 09:33 AM (AXxfu)

15 Nice teats!

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:33 AM (Vwz3I)

16 A few minutes later, while everyone was watching the old guy, the doggie nabbed the chicken

Posted by: fd at December 05, 2022 09:34 AM (sn5EN)

17 What a pathetic subject.

Looks more like a weekend at the Bidens in Delaware.

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at December 05, 2022 09:34 AM (lf83v)

18 Paralytic: I don't want to go on the cart!

All those people sitting around: Oh don't be such a baby!

It's like I don't even know you people.

Posted by: blaster at December 05, 2022 09:34 AM (pwExq)

19 All of them are there to pay respects to the greatest college football they ever saw, out of gratitude for him forsaking a career in the bigs to pursue a life of public service.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 05, 2022 09:34 AM (oINRc)

20 He's faking it for the attention.

Posted by: Psychologist at December 05, 2022 09:34 AM (JCZqz)

21 Greuze was a master at scenes of pathos.

Posted by: Ziba at December 05, 2022 09:34 AM (4h9M3)

22 So, when are we gonna have the reading of the will, Grandpa?

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 09:35 AM (27fX8)

23 Empty grandpa's drool-cup, Sebastien.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:35 AM (Vwz3I)

24 The Paralytic

Y'all better run like MF'ers when this shit wears off!

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 09:35 AM (9uCBG)

25 Seems pretty dark and foreboding. Everyone there is dependent on that guy, and they know when he's gone they're gonna lose their meal ticket. The dog gets it. Hey. Hey. you gonna eat all that?

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at December 05, 2022 09:35 AM (tBR6g)

26 Paralytic also can mean severely drunk.

YMMV

Posted by: Martini Farmer at December 05, 2022 09:35 AM (Q4IgG)

27 12 not odd, it is moving. Art is supposed to move you. I am not sure I would hang it, though. I feel the emotions from it, and those emotions are heavy.

Posted by: Piper at December 05, 2022 09:35 AM (ZdaMQ)

28 21 Greuze was a master at scenes of pathos.
Posted by: Ziba at December 05, 2022 09:34 AM (4h9M3)

A whole career devoted to just one of the Musketeers?

Posted by: blaster at December 05, 2022 09:35 AM (pwExq)

29 So, the dude is paralyzed, but he is wearing shoes.

Now, that's optimism.

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at December 05, 2022 09:35 AM (lf83v)

30 It would have been worse if he wasn't vaccinated.

Posted by: fd at December 05, 2022 09:35 AM (sn5EN)

31 A bit gloomy, no?

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 09:36 AM (4eKPg)

32 Good morning everyone.

Empty grandpa's drool-cup, Sebastien.
Posted by: andycanuck

I thought that was Miles Cowperthwaite's job.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:36 AM (qoGsy)

33 That's probably what it will be like when I die. Except instead of people there will be a shitload of cats.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 05, 2022 09:36 AM (UuD2k)

34 The little pup is nursing on its mom.

Posted by: redridinghood at December 05, 2022 09:36 AM (NpAcC)

35 "While everybody is preoccupied with the dying dude, I'm gonna steal that fucking chicken!"

Posted by: The Dog at December 05, 2022 09:36 AM (MTcmR)

36 I think he's faking it. Lazy asshole.

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 09:36 AM (4eKPg)

37 17 What a pathetic subject.

Looks more like a weekend at the Bidens in Delaware.
Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at December 05, 2022 09:34 AM

Lol. Alternate title- Biden on the Campaign Trail?
Biden Saving Democracy?
70 Million Votes?

Posted by: Moron Analyst at December 05, 2022 09:36 AM (JCZqz)

38 A caring family.

Posted by: Tuna at December 05, 2022 09:36 AM (gLRfa)

39 The guy trying to give the old geezer some beans:

"I'm still in your will, right grandpa?"

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 09:37 AM (9uCBG)

40 Is this the grandfather from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory?

Posted by: Quilter's Irish Death at December 05, 2022 09:37 AM (OgrpQ)

41 Someone needs to call Theodoric of York, Medieval Barber.

Nothing a few leeches couldn't cure.

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at December 05, 2022 09:38 AM (lf83v)

42 So, the dude is paralyzed, but he is wearing shoes.

Now, that's optimism.
Posted by: Adirondack Patriot

Optimism is buying green bananas.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 09:38 AM (9uCBG)

43 Well painted. Life was hard in the past.

Thank goodness for modern medicine. Health care has come a long way from the dark days of the past.

Well, except for that oopsie on mRNA technology. And in Canada, he would definitely be completely dead.

Posted by: NaCly Dog (u82oZ) at December 05, 2022 09:38 AM (u82oZ)

44 That's probably what it will be like when I die. Except instead of people there will be a shitload of cats.

Well, at least they'll be well fed when you leave.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at December 05, 2022 09:38 AM (tBR6g)

45
Paralysis Analysis - a limerick

There once was a doctor named Maury
Who paralyzed a patient. "So sorry!!
But gosh darn it, Bill
If you just can't hold still
I'll have t' shoot you up with curare!"

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 09:38 AM (ykeLU)

46 "Bring out yer dead!"

Posted by: observer at December 05, 2022 09:38 AM (MTcmR)

47 I thought that was Miles Cowperthwaite's job.
------------------
Grandma is 'comforting' him, upstairs.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:38 AM (Vwz3I)

48 If it's just his legs that are paralyzed, he can still grab a boobie before he goes, right?

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at December 05, 2022 09:38 AM (AXxfu)

49 Well painted. Life was hard in the past.

Thank goodness for modern medicine. Health care has come a long way from the dark days of the past.

Well, except for that oopsie on mRNA technology.

And psychiatry.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 09:39 AM (9uCBG)

50 I've never thought of decorating my living room with sail and tackle.

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 09:39 AM (4eKPg)

51 You may not like this painting at first, but it Greuze on you.

I'll see myself out...

Posted by: PabloD at December 05, 2022 09:39 AM (pqRYr)

52 Very good individual portraits.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:40 AM (Vwz3I)

53 Someone shoulda moved the toddler before they sat gramps down there.

Posted by: She Hobbit at December 05, 2022 09:40 AM (ftFVW)

54 The Layabout's Lair...otherwise called "A Federal Employee At Work".

Would Hang.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at December 05, 2022 09:40 AM (0ZEfs)

55 44 That's probably what it will be like when I die. Except instead of people there will be a shitload of cats.

Well, at least they'll be well fed when you leave.
Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at December 05, 2022 09:38 AM (tBR6g)

LOL!!! Cheeks and tongue first haha

Posted by: observer at December 05, 2022 09:40 AM (MTcmR)

56 I've never thought of decorating my living room with sail and tackle.
Posted by: Puddinhead

But parachutes and macrame candle cradles were totes okay during college.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:40 AM (qoGsy)

57 Where are the armed IRS agents?

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 09:41 AM (4eKPg)

58 44 I was waiting for this comment. Speaking of well fed, I am going to get some coffee, a piece of fruit and get the school day / normal day started.

Posted by: Piper at December 05, 2022 09:41 AM (ZdaMQ)

59
Well, except for that oopsie on mRNA technology.

And psychiatry.
Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 09:39 AM (9uCBG)

We're just a few years out from claiming sodomy cures cancer and if you don't do it you're a public health threat.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 05, 2022 09:41 AM (oINRc)

60 So the guy works as an assistant to lytics?

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 09:41 AM (27fX8)

61 56 I've never thought of decorating my living room with sail and tackle.
Posted by: Puddinhead

But parachutes and macrame candle cradles were totes okay during college.
-------------------
I fear that grand dad soiled the linen.

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 09:42 AM (4eKPg)

62 Also painted The Naughty Laundress...

https://tinyurl.com/yvkvk52j

Safe for work.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:42 AM (Vwz3I)

63 Why is that boy feeling grandpa's knee?

Is that therapeutic?

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at December 05, 2022 09:42 AM (lf83v)

64 Doggo's thinking: "If he goes, who'll sneak me beggin' strips?"

Posted by: red speck at December 05, 2022 09:42 AM (gS3OW)

65 Is that Fauci on the right next to the dog?

Posted by: dantesed at December 05, 2022 09:42 AM (88xKn)

66
It's medically proven that MAGAts are Russians and also, their skulls contain a large nugget of gold.

Posted by: CDC in 2028 at December 05, 2022 09:42 AM (oINRc)

67 We're just a few years out from claiming sodomy cures cancer and if you don't do it you're a public health threat.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice

The Paolo has, how you say, just the thing for sore throats.

Posted by: The Paolo at December 05, 2022 09:42 AM (qoGsy)

68 48 If it's just his legs that are paralyzed, he can still grab a boobie before he goes, right?
Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at December 05, 2022 09:38 AM

Son...have the maid in the corner come over here and change my neckerchief. Have her reach across and lean WAYYY over, and you'll help me "stand" once more in my final moments, if you know what I mean...

Posted by: Old "Paralyzed" Grandpa at December 05, 2022 09:43 AM (JCZqz)

69 62 Also painted The Naughty Laundress...

Oh I bet she is. Say no more, say no more!

Posted by: blaster at December 05, 2022 09:43 AM (pwExq)

70 I didn’t know that Moliere wrote “Who’s Life Is It, Anyway.”

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 09:44 AM (27fX8)

71 Also painted The Naughty Laundress...

https://tinyurl.com/yvkvk52j

Safe for work.
Posted by: andycanuck

Naughty? I think not. Wouldn't even rate her as coquettish.

Posted by: She Hobbit at December 05, 2022 09:44 AM (ftFVW)

72 Also painted The Naughty Laundress...
---------------
Note the Freudian slips in the top right-hand corner.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:44 AM (Vwz3I)

73 No upright bass.

Not really art.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 05, 2022 09:44 AM (1n+EO)

74 Also painted The Naughty Laundress...

https://tinyurl.com/yvkvk52j

Safe for work.
Posted by: andycanuck

Naughty? I think not. Wouldn't even rate her as coquettish.
Posted by: She Hobbit

She's taking a dump in that bucket!! Ewwwww.

Posted by: The Paolo at December 05, 2022 09:44 AM (qoGsy)

75 Judging by the painting it looks like a full house beats a pair o' lytics.

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 09:45 AM (ykeLU)

76 Not so grope-y now, are you, you lecherous old bastard.

Posted by: winsome scullery maid on the left at December 05, 2022 09:45 AM (h5TKJ)

77 Alas, tryest thou this magic potion from the Far East?

Marco Polo has named it fentanyl.

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at December 05, 2022 09:46 AM (lf83v)

78 Her life is ova!

https://tinyurl.com/58sxpxxw

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:46 AM (Vwz3I)

79 " Not so grope-y now, are you, you lecherous old bastard.
Posted by: winsome scullery maid"

You poisoned him, didn't you?

Posted by: fd at December 05, 2022 09:47 AM (sn5EN)

80 "Which is easier: to say, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Get up and walk’? But I want you to know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins.” So he said to the paralyzed man, “Get up, take your mat and go home.” Then the man got up and went home.

Posted by: red speck at December 05, 2022 09:47 AM (gS3OW)

81
Dog, therefore Art.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 05, 2022 09:47 AM (MoZTd)

82 Are all those people parasitic on the paralytic?

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 09:47 AM (27fX8)

83 Greuzesome scene.

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 09:48 AM (27fX8)

84 Village Idiot's Apprentice

Top o ta mornin to ya, gov'nor.

Posted by: NaCly Dog (u82oZ) at December 05, 2022 09:48 AM (u82oZ)

85
Needs a wife, "Are you just going to lie around all day when there's things to be done? The lawn needs mowing. And when is the garbage going to get taken out?.."

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 05, 2022 09:48 AM (MoZTd)

86 Guy on the right needs to xyz.

Posted by: nurse ratched at December 05, 2022 09:48 AM (U2p+3)

87
Paralytic Blues - a limerick

While facing the sum of all fears
His wife speaks out through her tears
"Please don't take him away,
I would like him to stay
He hasn't been this stiff in year!"

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 09:49 AM (ykeLU)

88 Keep on pluckin'

https://tinyurl.com/3nfrd8jc

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:49 AM (Vwz3I)

89 Guy on the right needs to xyz.
Posted by: nurse ratched

The dog noticed that too!

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:49 AM (qoGsy)

90 Poor guy just had too much gueuze.

Let him sleep it off

Posted by: Warai-otoko at December 05, 2022 09:49 AM (cdHi3)

91 78 Her life is ova!

https://tinyurl.com/58sxpxxw
______

Shouldna put all her eggs in one basket

Posted by: Chuck Martel at December 05, 2022 09:49 AM (fs1hN)

92 This is a lovely, moving scene of familial piety. I like how Grueze included the dog family too, to emphasize loyalty and duty to family.

Posted by: Kris at December 05, 2022 09:50 AM (OyyDO)

93 years, dammit

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 09:50 AM (ykeLU)

94 Guy on the right holding a cup.... His fly is open.

Posted by: Madamemayhem (uppity wench) at December 05, 2022 09:50 AM (Wy1BU)

95 Guy feeding him looks like a young Isaac Newton

Posted by: Warai-otoko at December 05, 2022 09:50 AM (cdHi3)

96 I like how each figure reacts to the ailing patriarch: different positions (appropriate to their age), different expressions, different dress appropriate to the ages of the family. But all dealing with the care needed for the ailing old man. The colors are subdued and rather dark as you might expect from the scene with brightness that emphasizes the faces and their varied expressions. The composition with the old man just off center and all the others facing him is very effective.

It's an evocative, emotional image that tells several stories.

Posted by: JTB at December 05, 2022 09:51 AM (7EjX1)

97 Guy feeding him looks like a young Isaac Newton
Posted by: Warai-otoko

Isaac there is gonna dump the saucer on him in furtherance of testing his gravity theories.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:51 AM (qoGsy)

98 71 Also painted The Naughty Laundress...

https://tinyurl.com/yvkvk52j

Safe for work.
Posted by: andycanuck

Not safe for work.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJSUWdLudOQ

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 05, 2022 09:51 AM (Y5qcH)

99 It's an evocative, emotional image that tells several stories.
Posted by: JTB at December 05, 2022 09:51 AM (7EjX1)

I read the post three times already and I still don't get the joke.

Posted by: blaster at December 05, 2022 09:52 AM (pwExq)

100 96 an evocative, emotional image

Yeah, but how many puns and boob jokes can we get out of it?

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 09:53 AM (27fX8)

101 Morning.

I don't know how I feel about this piece. I can't say I dislike any part of it but none of it comes together for me.

Would not hang.

Posted by: Robert - Metallica, 72 Seasons, out 4/14 at December 05, 2022 09:53 AM (1Yy3c)

102 The Bidet Crime Family recontextualized

Posted by: Anna Puma at December 05, 2022 09:53 AM (ymkqy)

103 If I am near death, the last thing I want is a room full of long faces staring at me.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:53 AM (qoGsy)

104
"Papa, before it's too late: where's the treasure buried?"

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 05, 2022 09:53 AM (MoZTd)

105 Like sands through the hourglass

Posted by: nurse ratched at December 05, 2022 09:54 AM (U2p+3)

106 52 Very good individual portraits.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:40 AM (Vwz3I)

Yes, but which one is the paralytic? Am I supposed to have a biology degree to understand this Whitey art?

Posted by: KBJ (don't confuse me KJP!) at December 05, 2022 09:54 AM (AMIL/)

107 Several of his dramatic, story-telling paintings at this blog although I don't know about some of the title translations...
https://tinyurl.com/29rbyz63

Also includes two new dogs.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:54 AM (Vwz3I)

108 he U.S. is at a pivotal point with China and will need military strength to ensure that American values, not Beijing’s, set global norms in the 21st century, Defense Secretary Lloyd Austin said Saturday.

Yeah? Then I guess it's to bad a dope like you is in charge ha?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 05, 2022 09:54 AM (dO/0d)

109
If I am near death, the last thing I want is a room full of long faces staring at me.
Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:53 AM (qoGsy)

In my case, they'll be celebrating.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 05, 2022 09:54 AM (MoZTd)

110 My dad's bro was paralyzed...you did not want him to grab you...strongest grip I've ever seen.

Posted by: BignJames at December 05, 2022 09:54 AM (AwYPR)

111 Yeah, but how many puns and boob jokes can we get out of it?
Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 09:53 AM (27fX

A picture is worth ten thousand boob jokes.

Posted by: Robert - Metallica, 72 Seasons, out 4/14 at December 05, 2022 09:54 AM (1Yy3c)

112 Darth Lloyd wants to make the vaccine mandate stick

Posted by: Anna Puma at December 05, 2022 09:55 AM (ymkqy)

113 96 I like how each figure reacts to the ailing patriarch: different positions (appropriate to their age), different expressions, different dress appropriate to the ages of the family. But all dealing with the care needed for the ailing old man. The colors are subdued and rather dark as you might expect from the scene with brightness that emphasizes the faces and their varied expressions. The composition with the old man just off center and all the others facing him is very effective.

It's an evocative, emotional image that tells several stories.

Posted by: JTB at December 05, 2022 09:51 AM (7EjX1)

The girl on the far left is very interesting to me. She is in shadow and not really grouped with the rest. She seems excluded or removed. She reminds me of the jealous sister from Greuze's "Village Bride".

https://tinyurl.com/rbuvxrf3

Posted by: Kris at December 05, 2022 09:55 AM (OyyDO)

114 Guy feeding him looks like a young Isaac Newton
------------
Is feeding grandpa some apple-sauce.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:55 AM (Vwz3I)

115 If I am near death, the last thing I want is a room full of long faces staring at me.
Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:53 AM (qoGsy)

When I go, I wanna go like rosie

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 05, 2022 09:55 AM (dO/0d)

116 If I am near death, the last thing I want is a room full of long faces staring at me.
Posted by: Tonypete

In my case, they'll be celebrating.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

The wife and I decided long ago there is to be no life insurance and we are spending our $$ down to pert near nothing.

We want it to be a sad day for everyone when we go.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:56 AM (qoGsy)

117 If I am near death, the last thing I want is a room full of long faces staring at me.
Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:53 AM (qoGsy)

*Makes note, no horses to be invited to TonyPete's funeral*

Posted by: Robert - Metallica, 72 Seasons, out 4/14 at December 05, 2022 09:56 AM (1Yy3c)

118 Pictured: Democrat vote harvesters waiting for him to cough up the location of his ballot.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at December 05, 2022 09:57 AM (L1lfF)

119 Hugs CBD. Clearly, this Monday is not being kind to him.

Posted by: creeper at December 05, 2022 09:57 AM (cTCuP)

120 Adoration of the Palsi.

Posted by: Tarbash, The Egyptian Magician at December 05, 2022 09:57 AM (toX1Y)

121
The wife and I decided long ago there is to be no life insurance and we are spending our $$ down to pert near nothing.

"We found a cure! You'll live another 50 years!"

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 05, 2022 09:57 AM (MoZTd)

122 *Makes note, no horses to be invited to TonyPete's funeral*

I wouldn't invite Jean Francois Cary or Sarah Jessica Parker to my funeral... nyah

Posted by: Anna Puma at December 05, 2022 09:57 AM (ymkqy)

123 Salty!

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 05, 2022 09:57 AM (1n+EO)

124 *Makes note, no horses to be invited to TonyPete's funeral*
Posted by: Robert

Or Julia Roberts or Sarah Jessica Parker. birm

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:57 AM (qoGsy)

125 Paralytic Blues - a limerick

While facing the sum of all fears
His wife speaks out through her tears
"Please don't take him away,
I would like him to stay
He hasn't been this stiff in year!"
Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 09:49 AM (ykeLU)

You naughty naughty boy

Posted by: observer at December 05, 2022 09:58 AM (MTcmR)

126 The wife and I decided long ago there is to be no life insurance and we are spending our $$ down to pert near nothing.

We want it to be a sad day for everyone when we go.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:56 AM (qoGsy)

I hope my parents leave us nothing. I want them to enjoy their lives and spend it all on themselves. They gave up a lot to take care of us.

Posted by: Kris at December 05, 2022 09:58 AM (OyyDO)

127 She seems excluded or removed.
----------
I assumed she's a servant.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 09:58 AM (Vwz3I)

128 The wife and I decided long ago there is to be no life insurance and we are spending our $$ down to pert near nothing.

We want it to be a sad day for everyone when we go.

A burial with a simple graveside service is $20,000+ now, so you might try and leave *something*. But I get the sentiment.

Posted by: Ian S. at December 05, 2022 09:58 AM (ZGrMX)

129 If I am near death, the last thing I want is a room full of long faces staring at me.
Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 09:53 AM (qoGsy)

I hope I don't have a fatal heart attack while in a hall of mirrors!

Posted by: John Kerry at December 05, 2022 09:58 AM (S9e7i)

130 POV: You're the sniper. Whom do you target first?

Posted by: Bandersnatch at December 05, 2022 09:58 AM (e+csY)

131 The serving girl in the background is sneaking away with the family fortune.

Posted by: Anna Puma at December 05, 2022 09:59 AM (ymkqy)

132 Not pictured: Charlie Bucket with the Golden Ticket. He'll get Grampa Joe walking in no time!

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at December 05, 2022 09:59 AM (YIVH2)

133 had to replace all the paralytic capacitors in my trs-80 model i the other day.

Posted by: anachronda at December 05, 2022 10:00 AM (Txkoe)

134 *tosses to Professor Squirrel an Everlasting Gobstopper*

Posted by: Anna Puma at December 05, 2022 10:00 AM (ymkqy)

135 had to replace all the paralytic capacitors in my trs-80 model i the other day.
Posted by: anachronda

Out of sync with the panametric grammeters?

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 10:01 AM (qoGsy)

136 FIRST!!!!!

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden at December 05, 2022 10:01 AM (Zz0t1)

137 Looks like a scene from a Monty Python movie.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden at December 05, 2022 10:02 AM (Zz0t1)

138 Looks like a scene from a Monty Python movie.
Posted by: Sponge

Just needs a giant stompy foot coming down on it.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 10:02 AM (qoGsy)

139 *turns to page 513 of last will and testament*

“And to my great grand-niece’s mother-in-law’s live-in lover’s dog I leave…”

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:03 AM (27fX8)

140 34 *tosses to Professor Squirrel an Everlasting Gobstopper*

*******

No need to go all wonkish.

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:03 AM (ykeLU)

141 I left my body to science. When they're done with me they'll cremate me and send my ashes back.

At no charge.

Posted by: creeper at December 05, 2022 10:03 AM (cTCuP)

142 Hugs CBD. Clearly, this Monday is not being kind to him.
Posted by: creeper

Is he still at the all-you-can-eat wafflefest ?

Posted by: JT at December 05, 2022 10:03 AM (T4tVD)

143 In Days of Yore, before streaming services:

"We'll have a nice dinner first and maybe later we'll go over a stare at the gimp for a while."

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at December 05, 2022 10:03 AM (Qzn2/)

144 "By the 1780s Neoclassicism had risen to popularity in France and Greuze’s work went out of fashion; his productivity and skill in decline, he died in poverty and relative obscurity."

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:04 AM (Vwz3I)

145 *tosses to Professor Squirrel an Everlasting Gobstopper*

*******

No need to go all wonkish.
Posted by: Muldoon

The Oompa Loompas set back respect for midgets 50 years.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 10:04 AM (qoGsy)

146 Like sands through the hourglass
Posted by: nurse ratched

These Are The Bidens Of Our Time

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:04 AM (9uCBG)

147 Hey? Where did everybody go?!

Posted by: Jason's Furniture at December 05, 2022 10:04 AM (toX1Y)

148 106 Yes, but which one is the paralytic? Am I supposed to have a biology degree to understand this Whitey art?

in the end, isn't the real paralytic the friends we made along the way?

Posted by: anachronda at December 05, 2022 10:04 AM (Txkoe)

149 “It’s Charlie Bouquet.”

— The new owner of the Chocolate Factory

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:05 AM (27fX8)

150 That pup should be weaned, already.

Posted by: BignJames at December 05, 2022 10:05 AM (AwYPR)

151 I hope I don't have a fatal heart attack while in a hall of mirrors!
Posted by: John Kerry at December 05, 2022 09:58 AM (S9e7i)

"Their cavalry has me surrounded!"

Posted by: Warai-otoko at December 05, 2022 10:05 AM (/EuRN)

152 LOL...Hiya, JT.

Posted by: creeper at December 05, 2022 10:05 AM (cTCuP)

153 Praying for Christopher R. Taylor.

Posted by: That NLurker guy where's my Irene Adler? at December 05, 2022 10:05 AM (eGTCV)

154 POV: You're the sniper. Whom do you target first?
Posted by: Bandersnatch

The serving girl in the background is sneaking away with the family fortune.
Posted by: Anna Puma

I think we have an answer!

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:06 AM (9uCBG)

155 I left my body to science.

*******

Hope you are okay with some blue-haired Diversitymed student in the anatomy lab. drawing a Hitler mustache on you with a Sharpie to protest the patriarchy...

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:06 AM (ykeLU)

156 144 "By the 1780s Neoclassicism had risen to popularity in France and Greuze’s work went out of fashion; his productivity and skill in decline, he died in poverty and relative obscurity."
Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:04 AM (Vwz3I)

-----------

When you're in vogue, it's all fancy green breeches and fast horses and you think it will never end.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at December 05, 2022 10:06 AM (Qzn2/)

157 I left my body to science. When they're done with me they'll cremate me and send my ashes back.

At no charge.
Posted by: creeper at December 05, 2022 10:03 AM (cTCuP)

Hope they don't send you to UTenn. "body farm".

Posted by: BignJames at December 05, 2022 10:07 AM (AwYPR)

158 Praying for Christopher R. Taylor.
Posted by: That NLurker

Thank you for the reminder. Prayers up.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 10:07 AM (qoGsy)

159 Hiya creeper !

Posted by: JT at December 05, 2022 10:07 AM (T4tVD)

160 I left my body to science.

*******

Hope you are okay with some blue-haired Diversitymed student in the anatomy lab. drawing a Hitler mustache on you with a Sharpie to protest the patriarchy...
Posted by: Muldoon

Just like Frat Christmas Party 1986!

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:07 AM (9uCBG)

161 144 "By the 1780s Neoclassicism had risen to popularity in France and Greuze’s work went out of fashion; his productivity and skill in decline, he died in poverty and relative obscurity."
---------------
He should have invested in tulips.

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 10:08 AM (HTCOy)

162 Hey, kid in the blue coat: You can’t feel a pulse in the knee!

Jeesh, I’m not even a doctor and even I know that.

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:10 AM (27fX8)

163 If only he could have had robot legs.

Posted by: XTC at December 05, 2022 10:10 AM (UnA8+)

164 Several of his dramatic, story-telling paintings at this blog although I don't know about some of the title translations...
https://tinyurl.com/29rbyz63

Interesting ... I recognize The Father's Curse, which was in one of the Childcraft kid's encyclopedia books we had, despite not seeing it for, uh, 29 years.

Posted by: spindrift at December 05, 2022 10:10 AM (h5TKJ)

165 From Kris's link, I like Hogarth's satirical "The [Marriage] Settlement" too:

https://tinyurl.com/5dx3e66w

Reminds me of Tom Jones and similar movies.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:11 AM (Vwz3I)

166 Praying for Christopher R. Taylor.
Posted by: That NLurker guy where's my Irene Adler? at December 05, 2022 10:05 AM (eGTCV)

What happened? Is he okay?

Posted by: Robert - Metallica, 72 Seasons, out 4/14 at December 05, 2022 10:11 AM (1Yy3c)

167 Praying for Christopher R. Taylor.
Posted by: That NLurker

Thank you for the reminder. Prayers up.
Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 10:07 AM (qoGsy)

What'd I miss?

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden at December 05, 2022 10:11 AM (Zz0t1)

168 “We can rebuild him. We can make him better, stronger, faster…”

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:11 AM (27fX8)

169 Christopher R. Taylor's brother died unexpectedly yesterday. They were very close and CRT is bereft.

Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 10:12 AM (qoGsy)

170 “And to my great grand-niece’s mother-in-law’s live-in lover’s dog I leave…”
------------
"...all of my estate and overseas properties. I was only pretending to be hard of hearing!"

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:12 AM (Vwz3I)

171 163 If only he could have had robot legs.
Posted by: XTC at December 05, 2022 10:10 AM (UnA8+)

-----------

We'd have the old coot doing backflips in no time.

Posted by: Boston Dynamics at December 05, 2022 10:12 AM (Qzn2/)

172 Paul Fahrenheit said he was registered democrat because it is easier to turn one side woke non-woke, than it is to the other side get people to want to win.

This is either a red pill, black pill, or untrue.

Posted by: Bourbonchicken at December 05, 2022 10:12 AM (44ww/)

173 From Kris's link, I like Hogarth's satirical "The [Marriage] Settlement" too:

-------

I read that as Hrothgar's.

Posted by: ShainS -- The Humiliation is Part of the Kink at December 05, 2022 10:13 AM (5ewfc)

174 Christopher R. Taylor's brother died unexpectedly yesterday. They were very close and CRT is bereft.
Posted by: Tonypete

Aww crap. 😢

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:13 AM (9uCBG)

175 >168 “We can rebuild him. We can make him better, stronger, faster…”

wonder what the 6-million-dollar man would cost in today's dollars?

Posted by: Fool Otto at December 05, 2022 10:13 AM (DB16e)

176 Hey, kid in the blue coat: You can’t feel a pulse in the knee! Jeesh, I’m not even a doctor and even I know that.
Posted by: Bulgaroctonus

*******

cough*popliteal artery* cough

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:13 AM (ykeLU)

177 I hope my parents leave us nothing. I want them to enjoy their lives and spend it all on themselves. They gave up a lot to take care of us.
Posted by: Kris at December 05, 2022 09:58 AM (OyyDO)

When my dad sold his house and went into assisted living he was sort of apologetic telling me he likely had enough savings to see both him and mom throughout their remaining days but there would not be much left for an inheritance. I had to tell him in no uncertain terms that it was his money, not mine, and I was pleased as could be that it was being spent keeping him and mom comfortable and with the services they needed. I don't get that mindset that what you earned over the course of your life somehow belongs to your kids - no it doesn't.

Posted by: moon_over_vermont at December 05, 2022 10:13 AM (87ngM)

178 Something to consider is that future generations are going to be much poorer than the current one because we have essentially sailed beyond the debt horizon.

College, even state universities are now nearly 10k per year for just tuition and fees. Health care expenses are exploding along with the coming deluge of vaxx induced illness. Housing, cost of transportation, and taxes are escalating for working folk that because of work, spouses, and children cannot easily relocate to lower tax areas.

Family, even if you are not religious, is about the only true legacy that one leaves on Earth when they depart. Something to think about.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:13 AM (bDjBG)

179 Hope you are okay with some blue-haired Diversitymed student in the anatomy lab. drawing a Hitler mustache on you with a Sharpie to protest the patriarchy...
Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:06 AM (ykeLU)

Actually, I am. I harbor the delusion that some day that Diversitymed student will be able to use what she learned from my carcass to help others.

And I console myself with the thought of $20k that didn't get siphoned out of my estate.

Posted by: creeper at December 05, 2022 10:13 AM (cTCuP)

180 Christopher R. Taylor's brother died unexpectedly yesterday. They were very close and CRT is bereft.
Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 10:12 AM (qoGsy)

Oh no....that's terrible. Having had a scare with my brother over Thanksgiving, I can empathize.

My deepest condolences and prayers for he and his family for comfort during this difficult time.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden at December 05, 2022 10:14 AM (Zz0t1)

181 Paul Fahrenheit? He only cast 451 votes.

But he’s quite mercurial.

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:14 AM (27fX8)

182 When you're in vogue, it's all fancy green breeches and fast horses and you think it will never end.
----------------
It's later than you think...

a lesson for us all.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:14 AM (Vwz3I)

183 169 I am so sorry to hear this! I will pray for him and his family. The only comfort in times like these comes from the Lord.

Posted by: Piper at December 05, 2022 10:14 AM (ZdaMQ)

184
wonder what the 6-million-dollar man would cost in today's dollars?
Posted by: Fool Otto at December 05, 2022 10:13 AM (DB16e)

4 million in parts, 37.8 billion in graft.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden at December 05, 2022 10:14 AM (Zz0t1)

185 175 >168 “We can rebuild him. We can make him better, stronger, faster…”

wonder what the 6-million-dollar man would cost in today's dollars?
Posted by: Fool Otto at December 05, 2022 10:13 AM (DB16e)

-----------

If you want government grant money, the six million won't even cover The Big Guy's ten percent.

Posted by: Boston Dynamics at December 05, 2022 10:15 AM (Qzn2/)

186 165 From Kris's link, I like Hogarth's satirical "The [Marriage] Settlement" too:

https://tinyurl.com/5dx3e66w

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:11 AM (Vwz3I)

That work is one of a series of six that satirizes the shallow and destructive lifestyles of British aristocrats. Spoiler: the young girl crying on the left? She dies in poverty of syphilis at the end while her "friends" rob her of what's left.

Posted by: Kris at December 05, 2022 10:15 AM (OyyDO)

187 What happened to Christopher Taylor? I missed most of the threads this weekend.

Posted by: Sasquatch, the Original Trans-Wookie at December 05, 2022 10:16 AM (xxG/v)

188 Condolences to Christopher R. Taylor, that's very sad.

Posted by: Erik In Texas at December 05, 2022 10:16 AM (z0DEK)

189 Forsooth, I sense this is an event of great significance, Elizabeth. I will be coming to join you anon.

Posted by: Fred G. Sanford at December 05, 2022 10:16 AM (FJYfm)

190 169 Christopher R. Taylor's brother died unexpectedly yesterday. They were very close and CRT is bereft.
Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 10:12 AM (qoGsy)

********

I'm very sorry to hear this. Prayers sent.

Posted by: Sasquatch, the Original Trans-Wookie at December 05, 2022 10:16 AM (xxG/v)

191 I left my body to science. When they're done with me they'll cremate me and send my ashes back.

At no charge.
Posted by: creeper at December 05, 2022 10:03 AM (cTCuP)

A few years ago I had read an article that Insty linked to about a science experiment involving cadavers left in a field somewhere to see...I think what the local wildlife would do? Something.

All that happened was a feral cat came by a few nights in a row and chewed on some dead woman's armpit.

You leave your body to science thinking they'll do all sorts of shit hopefully leading to cures for cancer. What they do is leave you out to get chewed on by cats.

Screw that. When I die I want to be set on fire while beautiful young women sing and dance naked around the flames. Like Burning Man.

Posted by: Robert - Metallica, 72 Seasons, out 4/14 at December 05, 2022 10:17 AM (1Yy3c)

192
Ah man, CRT... I know they were close. Lived together, I believe, if memory serves. So sad. Prayin' for ya, buddy.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 05, 2022 10:17 AM (oINRc)

193 176 OK, I guess I should’ve written “kneecap” instead of “knee.” Because you can’t feel a pulse in the kneecap, right, Muldoon? It’s cartilage, isn’t it?

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:17 AM (27fX8)

194 Paul Fahrenheit? He only cast 451 votes.

But he’s quite mercurial.

******

Only to a degree.

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:18 AM (ykeLU)

195 Here are the UK climate goals.
https://tinyurl.com/muvk9v5v

Posted by: CN at December 05, 2022 10:18 AM (Zzbjj)

196 So, the dude is paralyzed, but he is wearing shoes.

Now, that's optimism.
Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at December 05, 2022

***
Or maybe it's just cold. He seems to be fully dressed and there's a blanket across his legs.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at December 05, 2022 10:18 AM (J2vNu)

197 The Rake's Progress series is excellent too. I'll have to see the others in the female version now then too.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:19 AM (Vwz3I)

198 Christopher R. Taylor's brother died unexpectedly yesterday
------------------------
:-(

Posted by: Puddleglum at December 05, 2022 10:19 AM (sAmhv)

199 It’s cartilage, isn’t it?

******

Kneecap is bone.

Remember the first rule of holes.

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:19 AM (ykeLU)

200 I just found out one of the guys I work with died of a heart attack last night. He was 61. Gee.

Posted by: Archer at December 05, 2022 10:20 AM (gmo/4)

201 > Out of sync with the panametric grammeters?
Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 10:01 AM (qoGsy)

A lot of side-fumbling going on in this picture, to be sure.

Posted by: Rodrigo Borgia at December 05, 2022 10:20 AM (bW8dp)

202 Christopher R. Taylor's brother died unexpectedly yesterday. They were very close and CRT is bereft.
Posted by: Tonypete at December 05, 2022 10:12 AM (qoGsy)

That's terrible! I'm really sorry to hear that. He has my deepest condolences.

Posted by: Robert - Metallica, 72 Seasons, out 4/14 at December 05, 2022 10:21 AM (1Yy3c)

203 >
194 Paul Fahrenheit? He only cast 451 votes.

But he’s quite mercurial.

******

Only to a degree.
Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:18 AM (ykeLU)

That's hot.

Posted by: Paris Hilton-Kelvin at December 05, 2022 10:22 AM (bW8dp)

204 Sorry to hear of Christopher Taylor's brother. I enjoy Chris's comments here. They are the comments of someone with an open mind and concern for all.

Posted by: Wally at December 05, 2022 10:22 AM (FJYfm)

205 Remember the first rule of holes.
Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:19 AM (ykeLU)

Don't stick your dick into crazy?

Posted by: Robert - Metallica, 72 Seasons, out 4/14 at December 05, 2022 10:22 AM (1Yy3c)

206 191 There is actually a field called “forensic etymology,” I think, where they can tell approximately how long a corpse has been dead based on what kinds of bugs are decomposing it. I think there is actually some research facility somewhere where they do leave out corpses in various conditions so that they can study the decomposition process.

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:22 AM (27fX8)

207 Just saw the trailer for Violent Night. That looks awesome. I find it interesting that for the last few years the new Christmas movies have Santa as a badass.

Posted by: Madamemayhem (uppity wench) at December 05, 2022 10:23 AM (Wy1BU)

208 "...all of my estate and overseas properties. I was only pretending to be hard of hearing!"
Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022

***
The tradition among fishermen is to claim to be hard of herring.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at December 05, 2022 10:23 AM (J2vNu)

209 Remember the first rule of holes.

Hi. You must be new here.

Posted by: Oddbob at December 05, 2022 10:23 AM (nfrXX)

210 I don't get that mindset that what you earned over the course of your life somehow belongs to your kids - no it doesn't.
Posted by: moon_over_vermont

No one is saying that one should go without care. But, remember, prior to these last two generations, most care was done at home and primarily by women who were not compensated in any way.

But, no generation stands on its own two feet, there was always a previous generation that sacrificed etc. to get the current generation where it stands today. It is always wise to be humble because telling your kids that you are going to spend all your money on frivolities and leave a mess behind for others to clean up is not exactly conducive to fond memories of the departed.

I don't think you can find a single example of where children asked to be born and viewing them as a burden is why our rate of childbearing is below the rate of regeneration which essentially is ruining society and a mark of decivilization.

The question is never whether something can be done but should it be done.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:24 AM (bDjBG)

211 191 There is actually a field called “forensic etymology,” I think, where they can tell approximately how long a corpse has been dead based on what kinds of bugs are decomposing it. I think there is actually some research facility somewhere where they do leave out corpses in various conditions so that they can study the decomposition process.
Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:22 AM (27fX

Composing was hard, but decomposing is mostly just laying around.

Posted by: Beethoven at December 05, 2022 10:24 AM (FJYfm)

212 Interesting ... I recognize The Father's Curse, which was in one of the Childcraft kid's encyclopedia books we had, despite not seeing it for, uh, 29 years.
-------------
That is interesting. I've had that happen to me too or even seeing a painting in the background at a British mansion in movie, TV, or documentary and saying, "I've seen that one before!"

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:24 AM (Vwz3I)

213 Just saw the trailer for Violent Night. That looks awesome. I find it interesting that for the last few years the new Christmas movies have Santa as a badass.
Posted by: Madamemayhem (uppity wench) at December 05, 2022

***
I really liked the Mel Gibson flick, Fat Man, a couple of years ago.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at December 05, 2022 10:24 AM (J2vNu)

214 Muldoon, next you’ll be telling me that I shouldn’t be undergoing periodic bleedings to rebalance my humors. Jeesh.

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:24 AM (27fX8)

215 197 The Rake's Progress series is excellent too. I'll have to see the others in the female version now then too.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:19 AM (Vwz3I)

Yeah. Rake's Progress is good too. I like the card game scene and the insane asylum scene.

Posted by: Kris at December 05, 2022 10:24 AM (OyyDO)

216 Screw that. When I die I want to be set on fire while beautiful young women sing and dance naked around the flames. Like Burning Man.
Posted by: Robert
---------------------
It is the Body Farm at the University of Tennessee.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:25 AM (bDjBG)

217 108 he U.S. is at a pivotal point with China and will need military strength to ensure that American values, not Beijing’s, set global norms in the 21st century, Defense Secretary Lloyd Austin said Saturday.

Yeah? Then I guess it's to bad a dope like you is in charge ha?
Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 05, 2022 09:54 AM (dO/0d)

This is nothing but whoring out the Defense Authorization bill for the nothing-to-do-with national defense bullshit that Chuck Schumer and his ally Mitch McConnell are loading it up with; legalized pot among them. I know a lot of y'all are probably okay with pot - but you might not work in places where you actually have to (a) show up, (b) care about things, and (c) not get your hands chopped off in machinery that's as unflinching as January in Siberia.

Posted by: Erik In Texas at December 05, 2022 10:25 AM (aGGj6)

218 177 I feel this way, too. My parents are divorced and both remarried; both are very comfortable. But it’s their money, not mine. J’s mother is very wealthy, he is an only child. His mother was actually concerned with me until she was telling me how at this stage of her life she isn’t going to scrimp on quality anything. I told her she shouldn’t, take a vacation every other week, buy those shoes! He kicked me under the table. 😂 I have life insurance with my middle daughter as the beneficiary. She will end up being the one to make sure her little sister (autistic) is fine, and I know she will give her older sister money for needs. My oldest would just spend it until it was gone on stupid things.

Posted by: Piper at December 05, 2022 10:25 AM (ZdaMQ)

219 So, the dude is paralyzed, but he is wearing shoes.

Now, that's optimism.

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at December 05, 2022

---------

Saw a old guy being wheeled in on an ambulance stretcher by paramedics into the VA Medical Center ER this morning ... and he was wearing a cowboy hat.

Just cracked me up for some reason ...

Posted by: ShainS -- The Humiliation is Part of the Kink at December 05, 2022 10:25 AM (tYETB)

220 The Santa in Rudolph was an a**hole.

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:26 AM (27fX8)

221 . I think there is actually some research facility somewhere where they do leave out corpses in various conditions so that they can study the decomposition process.

********

Colorado Mesa University in Grand Junction has a "body farm" for exactly that sort of forensics study

https://tinyurl.com/yrnyxbsk

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:26 AM (ykeLU)

222 Actually, I am. I harbor the delusion that some day that Diversitymed student will be able to use what she learned from my carcass to help others.

These days you'll be lucky if she doesn't perform a posthumous trans on you.

Posted by: Ian S. at December 05, 2022 10:26 AM (ZGrMX)

223 But, you really can’t feel the pulse in the kneecap, right?

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:27 AM (27fX8)

224 81
Dog, therefore Art.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 05, 2022 09:47 AM (MoZTd)

No cards, no poker chips.

Art status: Undetermined

Posted by: CZ=FNG, Free Republic of Florida at December 05, 2022 10:28 AM (MkuC5)

225 221 Yay! I got something right!

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:28 AM (27fX8)

226 > All that happened was a feral cat came by a few nights in a row and chewed on some dead woman's armpit.

The late Governor of Alaska, Jay Hammond, told a story in his autobiography from his days as a State Trooper, back in the dog sled days.

Some bush rat came into "town" and happened to mention that he hadn't seen his "neighbor" from 35 miles away, Old Charlie, for, oh, say, 3 or 4 months.

Hammond went out to check on Old Charlie, and sure enough he'd joined the invisible choir. He collected a semi-feral cat that was on the property and threw it inside to keep Old Charlie from being eaten by shrews any worse than he already was, then left, resolving to come back with some help to bury him.

Things Happened and he didn't get back out there for a while.

By then the cat had pretty much eaten Old Charlie down to the bones.

Posted by: Paris Hilton-Kelvin at December 05, 2022 10:28 AM (bW8dp)

227 The Santa in Rudolph was an a**hole.
Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:26 AM (27fX

It really wasn't the red nose that caused Santa to shun Rudolph. It was the fact that Rudolph was having clandestine rendezvous with the homosexual wanna-be dentist, Hermy.

Posted by: Wally at December 05, 2022 10:28 AM (FJYfm)

228 Colorado Mesa University in Grand Junction has a "body farm" for exactly that sort of forensics study

https://tinyurl.com/yrnyxbsk
Posted by: Muldoon

If you believe tv, CSI in Vegas has one.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:30 AM (9uCBG)

229 Is he sitting on that kid?

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy, Set the Earth to fire and reshape it closer to the heart's desire at December 05, 2022 10:30 AM (t3/qz)

230 Yeah. Rake's Progress is good too. I like the card game scene and the insane asylum scene.

Posted by: Kris at December 05, 2022 10:24 AM (OyyDO)

Ya know what? That whole series is good. The look on the rake's face when he has to marry the crone is great. You can feel his distaste, but he has no guilt or introspection as to how he got himself into that situation. He just dislikes the woman and only wants her money.

Posted by: Kris at December 05, 2022 10:30 AM (OyyDO)

231 All that happened was a feral cat came by a few nights in a row and chewed on some dead woman's armpit.

You leave your body to science thinking they'll do all sorts of shit hopefully leading to cures for cancer. What they do is leave you out to get chewed on by cats.

I am failing to see the problem.

Posted by: Feral cat at December 05, 2022 10:30 AM (pwExq)

232 Hmmm. I wonder how much altitude affects decomposition.

Posted by: nurse ratched at December 05, 2022 10:31 AM (Z9wrD)

233 His reaction to "elf practice" is awesome.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy, Set the Earth to fire and reshape it closer to the heart's desire at December 05, 2022 10:31 AM (t3/qz)

234 I can never quite figure this out: Is elf in Rudolph named “Hermy” or “Herbie?” Seems like they pronounce it both ways in the show.

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:31 AM (27fX8)

235 > If you believe tv, CSI in Vegas has one.

If you believe tv, any picture can be magnified and clarified indefinitely just by yelling "Enhance" at the screen a few times.

Posted by: Paris Hilton-Kelvin at December 05, 2022 10:31 AM (bW8dp)

236 Kneecap can be either a noun or a verb. Beware.

Posted by: Heino Fan Club #52, Hamburg at December 05, 2022 10:32 AM (dXilO)

237 I can never quite figure this out: Is elf in Rudolph named “Hermy” or “Herbie?” Seems like they pronounce it both ways in the show.
Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:31 AM (27fX

Herpes. It was the gift that no one wanted, but the Elves gave it to us anyway.

Posted by: Wally at December 05, 2022 10:32 AM (FJYfm)

238 Dog, therefore Art.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 05, 2022 09:47 AM (MoZTd)

No cards, no poker chips.

Art status: Undetermined
Posted by: CZ=FNG, Free Republic of Florida at December 05, 2022 10:28 AM (MkuC5)
---
Also, no mention of velvet and blacklight.

Posted by: Axeman at December 05, 2022 10:33 AM (krQz2)

239 I mean heat and humidity and exposure to sunlight, sure. But does altitude change anything?

Posted by: nurse ratched at December 05, 2022 10:33 AM (Z9wrD)

240 That is skinny santa. He doesn't become jolly until he gets fat. Then he adopts a pseudo jolly attitude to hide his feeling of shame. He is really unhappy because he is far, and fat because he is unhappy. It is a viscous cycle.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy, Set the Earth to fire and reshape it closer to the heart's desire at December 05, 2022 10:33 AM (t3/qz)

241 177 When my dad sold his house and went into assisted living he was sort of apologetic telling me he likely had enough savings to see both him and mom throughout their remaining days but there would not be much left for an inheritance. I had to tell him in no uncertain terms that it was his money, not mine, and I was pleased as could be that it was being spent keeping him and mom comfortable and with the services they needed. I don't get that mindset that what you earned over the course of your life somehow belongs to your kids - no it doesn't.
Posted by: moon_over_vermont at December 05, 2022 10:13 AM (87ngM)

I mean hell, my father has flat out said he plans on making sure he leaves me with debts that I have to pay on his behalf, because I "need to learn a lesson about being financially responsible for other people".

Posted by: XTC at December 05, 2022 10:34 AM (UnA8+)

242 > 234 I can never quite figure this out: Is elf in Rudolph named “Hermy” or “Herbie?” Seems like they pronounce it both ways in the show.
Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:31 AM (27fX

imdb.com says "Hermey". Played by Paul Soles, who did a lot of voice acting. Apparently no relation to '70s-'80s Bad Girl P.J. Soles.

Posted by: Paris Hilton-Kelvin at December 05, 2022 10:34 AM (bW8dp)

243 Hogarth's Marriage a la Mode series...

https://tinyurl.com/53k8acw7

Although I think Kris meant A Harlot's Progress:

https://tinyurl.com/589dbdyp

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:34 AM (Vwz3I)

244 If you believe tv, any picture can be magnified and clarified indefinitely just by yelling "Enhance" at the screen a few times.
Posted by: Paris Hilton-Kelvin at December 05, 2022 10:31 AM (bW8dp)

*Blinks*

They can't do that?

Posted by: Robert - Metallica, 72 Seasons, out 4/14 at December 05, 2022 10:35 AM (1Yy3c)

245 Nice.

Posted by: Peppermint Patti at December 05, 2022 10:35 AM (47YPS)

246 /off peanuts sock

Posted by: Aetius451AD Laptop, Doomscroller at December 05, 2022 10:35 AM (47YPS)

247 Hmmm. I wonder how much altitude affects decomposition.
Posted by: nurse ratched

Depends on what you define as "altitude".
There's perfectly saved mummies all up & down Mt. Everest.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:36 AM (9uCBG)

248 The Paolo does not need to yell “Enhance” to be, how you say, “magnified and clarified.”

Posted by: The Paolo at December 05, 2022 10:36 AM (27fX8)

249 > I mean hell, my father has flat out said he plans on making sure he leaves me with debts that I have to pay on his behalf

You are not, in general, legally required to pay debts incurred by your parents.

If your father dies in debt, that's the creditor's tough luck.

You personally don't owe them shit.

Posted by: Paris Hilton-Kelvin at December 05, 2022 10:36 AM (bW8dp)

250 Do old people decompose faster than young people? How about fat v skinny? Do alcoholics have a little staying power?

Posted by: nurse ratched at December 05, 2022 10:36 AM (Z9wrD)

251 Apparently no relation to '70s-'80s Bad Girl P.J. Soles.
Posted by: Paris Hilton-Kelvin at December 05, 2022

***
Who, strangely enough, has no listing on Wikifeet! A crime!

Posted by: Q. Tarantino at December 05, 2022 10:36 AM (J2vNu)

252 I mean hell, my father has flat out said he plans on making sure he leaves me with debts that I have to pay on his behalf, because I "need to learn a lesson about being financially responsible for other people".
Posted by: XTC at December 05, 2022 10:34 AM (UnA8

We, on the other hand, age 65 and 81, are giving the kids large gifts now, to decrease the amount the government can steal.

Posted by: CN at December 05, 2022 10:37 AM (Zzbjj)

253 Depends on what you define as "altitude".
There's perfectly saved mummies all up & down Mt. Everest.
Posted by: rickb223 at

I would
Think that's more due to temperature.

Posted by: nurse ratched at December 05, 2022 10:37 AM (Z9wrD)

254 > P.J. Soles.

Wikipedia says her maiden name was "Hardon".

Indeed.

Posted by: Rodrigo Borgia at December 05, 2022 10:37 AM (bW8dp)

255 Do alcoholics have a little staying power?
Posted by: nurse ratched at December 05, 2022 10:36 AM (Z9wrD)

*hic*

Posted by: Hillary Clinton giving you the side eye at December 05, 2022 10:38 AM (1Yy3c)

256 250 Do old people decompose faster than young people? How about fat v skinny? Do alcoholics have a little staying power?
Posted by: nurse ratched at December 05, 2022 10:36 AM (Z9wrD)

Self mummification is illegal in Japan.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 05, 2022 10:38 AM (UuD2k)

257 There's perfectly saved mummies all up & down Mt. Everest.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:36 AM (9uCBG)

freeze dried

Posted by: BignJames at December 05, 2022 10:38 AM (AwYPR)

258 Hmmm. I wonder how much altitude affects decomposition.

*******

Altitude in and of itself, not much, but colder temps at higher altitudes may influence things.

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:38 AM (ykeLU)

259 253 Depends on what you define as "altitude".
There's perfectly saved mummies all up & down Mt. Everest.
Posted by: rickb223 at

I would
Think that's more due to temperature.
Posted by: nurse ratched at December 05, 2022 10:37 AM (Z9wrD)

'Cold', very dry air. The ice sublimates and the body desiccates.

Ice Mummy Truckers

Posted by: Aetius451AD Laptop, Doomscroller at December 05, 2022 10:39 AM (47YPS)

260 I was wondering why there were only etchings of the Harlot's Progress but...

||The original paintings were destroyed in a fire at Fonthill House in 1755, the country house of William Beckford (1709–1770), a politician and father of William Thomas Beckford (1 October 1760 – 2 May 1844) builder of Fonthill Abbey in Wiltshire. The original plates survived, and were sold by Hogarth's widow, Jane, to John Boydell in 1789; by him to Baldwin, Cradock and Joy in 1818; and then to Henry Bohn in 1835. Each produced further copies.||

Wiki: https://tinyurl.com/2p8fee2b

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:39 AM (Vwz3I)

261 Self mummification is illegal in Japan.
Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 05, 2022 10:38 AM (UuD2k)

Where have our freedoms gone!
-average Japanese weebo

Posted by: Aetius451AD Laptop, Doomscroller at December 05, 2022 10:39 AM (47YPS)

262 I mean hell, my father has flat out said he plans on making sure he leaves me with debts that I have to pay on his behalf, because I "need to learn a lesson about being financially responsible for other people".
Posted by: XTC

First, consult a lawyer now to protect yourself--states can and do vary on debts laws. Second, I would consider not cosigning any debts especially medical, second, I would advice do not recognize any post mortem by paying them yourself. You also do not have to be an executor even if named in a will as such. Everything should go through via the estate and its assets if any, not yours. Thus, any lawsuits would be against the estate and if that estate has no assets, you do not want to be next in line for collections so again protect yourself now by getting legal advice. It is cheaper now than later to avoid legal traps.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:39 AM (bDjBG)

263 Are there blowflies and mortuary flies at 14K elevation?

Posted by: Heino Fan Club #52, Hamburg at December 05, 2022 10:40 AM (dXilO)

264 I mean hell, my father has flat out said he plans on making sure he leaves me with debts that I have to pay on his behalf, because I "need to learn a lesson about being financially responsible for other people".
Posted by: XTC at December 05, 2022 10:34 AM (UnA8+)

I'm sorry.

Posted by: Bourbonchicken at December 05, 2022 10:40 AM (44ww/)

265 Interesting, but wouldn't hang.

The artist's concept for the painting wasn't a great reach since Jesus was also to have healed the paralytic at Capernaum.

There also seems very little possibility the reclining gentleman would rise & walk again. He clearly had too damn many well-fed dependents, appearing to be not unhappily awaiting his passing, including the kneeling lad who would likely be the main inheriter.

Posted by: Lola at December 05, 2022 10:40 AM (NIYa7)

266 We, on the other hand, age 65 and 81, are giving the kids large gifts now, to decrease the amount the government can steal. Posted by: CN

-------------------------
Nice to bless your children that way.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:41 AM (bDjBG)

267 My gosh! I am so sorry to hear about Christopher Taylor's brother. What a shock for his family and friends. Here is a prayer iif someone who is in touch with him cares to send it along:

God of us all, we thank you for God's grace through which people who know Christopher in person and on this board. A life they love has been torn from them. Expectations the years once held have vanished. The mystery of death has stricken them. O, God you know the lives we live and the deaths we die-woven so strangely of purpose and of chance, of reason and the irrational, of strength and fragility, of happiness and of pain. Into your hands the soul of Christopher's brother. No mortal life you made is without eternal meaning. No earthly fate is beyond your redeeming. Through your grace that can do far more than we can think or imagine, fulfill in Christopher's brother your purpose that reaches beyond time or death. Lead him from strength to strength and fit him for love and service in your heavenly kingdom. You alone, God, make us to dwell here. Whom, finally, have we on earth or heaven but you? Lighten those in darkness with your love.

In Jesus' name. Amen

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 05, 2022 10:41 AM (6teN/)

268 Plus, Santa’s got that Harridan wife who’s trying to fatten him up so that he’ll keel over and die from complications of diabetes, while she takes little trips over to the Island of Misfit Toys for some action with King Moonracer.

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:41 AM (27fX8)

269 You are not, in general, legally required to pay debts incurred by your parents.

If your father dies in debt, that's the creditor's tough luck.

You personally don't owe them shit.
Posted by: Paris Hilton-Kelvin at December 05, 2022

***
Back when we had newspapers and "Personals" columns, people would often take out a notice: "Not responsible for any debts but my own." Was that a sort of legal disclaimer of those days?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at December 05, 2022 10:41 AM (J2vNu)

270 My cousin discovered our aunt and uncle died. He went in 2021 and she in 2022. We don't have any details as they had decided not to take our phone calls. Pretty sad.

Posted by: Notsothoreau at December 05, 2022 10:41 AM (uz3Px)

271 I mean heat and humidity and exposure to sunlight, sure. But does altitude change anything?

Posted by: nurse ratched

Less oxygen at altitude, so it should slow things down. But, temperatures are also lower, so people who die at high altitude are often mummified by that. There are several bodies near the summit of Mt Everest that have been there for decades - too dangerous to try and bring them down.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at December 05, 2022 10:42 AM (lTGtQ)

272 234 I can never quite figure this out: Is elf in Rudolph named “Hermy” or “Herbie?” Seems like they pronounce it both ways in the show.
Posted by: Bulgaroctonus

----------------
Original draft had him named Herpes. The writers compromised some going with Hermy and others as Herbie.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:42 AM (bDjBG)

273 When I die, needn't bury me at all
Just pickle these old bones in alcohol
Don't be sad
Just think about the good ole' times we had

Posted by: Common Tater at December 05, 2022 10:43 AM (hSyuk)

274 Sometimes the most interesting thing about this place is the unexpected directions that a thread can take. And finding out who holds what obscure bit of knowledge.

Posted by: Oddbob at December 05, 2022 10:43 AM (nfrXX)

275 Prayer not my own but adapted from our Book of Worship. I appreciate the way they phrase things at difficult times.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 05, 2022 10:43 AM (6teN/)

276 My kidney stone condition is still worse than when I went in for the procedure on Friday. I guess the warnings of what negatives could happen have happened. I have call in to the doctor to give me direction on what he wants me to do. I'm trying to avoid going to the ER but it may be unavoidable. In hindsight should have just let the asymptomatic stones alone.

It's what I call my Schleprock luck for those familiar with the Flintstones.

Posted by: polynikes at December 05, 2022 10:43 AM (l4ZPt)

277 Interesting situation with my wife, the co-executor of her mother's estate, and the other co-executor of her executor of her estate, Jackie the daughter of my MIL's second husband. Seems after the estate has been basically settled my MIL's long lost cousin died and left my MIL and/or her children $60K. Since the estate was for all the children the question is does the $60 get divided by the three blood relations or the total blood plus inlaw children of eight. We are of the opinion that it only includes the blood relatives not those of a separate marriage. But lawyers like things easy. Since the estate spent $24K for my MIL's second husband's funeral while her funeral cost around $8k added to the fact that we did not contest the inlaws claim to their father's massive collection of stuff we figure the $60k should be divided by 3 instead of 8. Opinions welcomed

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 10:43 AM (HTCOy)

278 Depends on what you define as "altitude".
There's perfectly saved mummies all up & down Mt. Everest.
Posted by: rickb223 at

I would
Think that's more due to temperature.
Posted by: nurse ratched

That's just it. Higher you go, the colder it gets. I think it would have more to do with temperature than solely elevation. Heck the Donner party in July would have decomposed faster in July than January in the same place.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:44 AM (9uCBG)

279 > people would often take out a notice: "Not responsible for any debts but my own." Was that a sort of legal disclaimer of those days?

I think those were mainly from couples who had separated.

No idea if it had any legal effect, but I remember you could keep pretty good tabs of which couples were on the outs in my (small) town by watching for those.

Posted by: Rodrigo Borgia at December 05, 2022 10:44 AM (bW8dp)

280 Back when we had newspapers and "Personals" columns, people would often take out a notice: "Not responsible for any debts but my own." Was that a sort of legal disclaimer of those days?
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius

You would see that post divorce, post emancipation of a child, or after death of a parent and legal notice used to be required in a paper of record. Dunno about today.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:44 AM (bDjBG)

281 Sometimes the most interesting thing about this place is the unexpected directions that a thread can take. And finding out who holds what obscure bit of knowledge.

No reference is too obscure for the Horde. It's great.

Posted by: Ian S. at December 05, 2022 10:44 AM (ZGrMX)

282 From Marriage a la Mode I'm sensing a theme...

||Scene 6: The Lady’s Death: The final scene takes place in the house of the Countess’s father. She has taken poison on learning that her lover has been hanged for the murder of the Earl, reported in the broadsheet at her feet. Her child, deformed and crippled by congenital syphilis, embraces her and her father takes a ring from her finger. An apothecary scolds the servant whom he accuses of obtaining the poison.||

Maybe the family can sue modern Native Americans for compensation??

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:44 AM (Vwz3I)

283 Fen, thank you for the prayer on behalf of CRT. I desperately wanted to do that but couldn't find the words.

Posted by: creeper at December 05, 2022 10:44 AM (cTCuP)

284 So the thread evolved from paralysis to rigor mortis. Not that far of a deviation for nearly 300 comments.

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:44 AM (ykeLU)

285 When I die, needn't bury me at all
Just pickle these old bones in alcohol
Don't be sad
Just think about the good ole' times we had
Posted by: Common Tater at December 05, 2022

***
I woke up still not dead again today.
The Internet said that I had passed away.
If I died I wasn't dead to stay --
And I woke up still not dead again today!

Posted by: Willie Nelson at December 05, 2022 10:45 AM (J2vNu)

286 240 That is skinny santa. He doesn't become jolly until he gets fat. Then he adopts a pseudo jolly attitude to hide his feeling of shame. He is really unhappy because he is far, and fat because he is unhappy. It is a viscous cycle.
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy, Set the Earth to fire and reshape it closer to the heart's desire at December 05, 2022 10:33 AM (t3/qz)

He'd be skinny again if people just bullied him harder.

Posted by: XTC at December 05, 2022 10:45 AM (UnA8+)

287 A piece published in a major liberal publication funded by leftist billionaire George Soros is projecting global economic disaster.

The Soros-funded Project Syndicate released a Dec. 2 column by New York University Professor Emeritus of Economics Nouriel Roubini headlined: “The Unavoidable Crash.” Roubini wrote that years of frivolous fiscal, monetary and credit policies compounded by major negative supply shocks have significantly damaged the world economy, including the U.S.: “Stagflationary pressures are now putting the squeeze on a massive mountain of public- and private-sector debt.” Roubini didn’t mince words. “The mother of all economic crises looms, and there will be little that policymakers can do about it,” he wrote.

Posted by: SMOD at December 05, 2022 10:45 AM (RHGPo)

288 Then there was those Himalayan climbers who decided to freeze spelling out the letters Y-M-C-A.

Wacky.

Posted by: Bourbonchicken at December 05, 2022 10:45 AM (44ww/)

289 Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:39 AM (bDjBG)

Sound advice. My husband and I were asked to be the 96yo cousin's "executors", we turned it down for exactly this reason.

Posted by: CN at December 05, 2022 10:46 AM (Zzbjj)

290 Less oxygen at altitude, so it should slow things down. But, temperatures are also lower, so people who die at high altitude are often mummified by that. There are several bodies near the summit of Mt Everest that have been there for decades - too dangerous to try and bring them down.
Posted by: Thomas Paine

There are mummies in Peru because they "bury" them in caves in the Andes. Cold, dry air with low oxygen. But mostly cold.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:46 AM (9uCBG)

291 Then there was those Himalayan climbers who decided to freeze spelling out the letters Y-M-C-A.

Wacky.
Posted by: Bourbonchicken at December 05, 2022 10:45 AM (44ww/)

That's dedication to trolling, right there. Winners. All of them.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden at December 05, 2022 10:46 AM (Zz0t1)

292 . . . He is really unhappy because he is far, and fat because he is unhappy. It is a viscous cycle.
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy, Set the Earth to fire and reshape it closer to the heart's desire at December 05, 2022

***
A sticky situation, no doubt.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at December 05, 2022 10:47 AM (J2vNu)

293 Altitude plays a role in cellular decomposition. Probably mostly the lack of humidity. Freeze drying is done by placing frozen food in a vacuum chamber and applying radiant heat. This causes the moisture to sublimate, that is, pass from ice to vapor, without an intermediate stage. This causes less damage to the cells, so foods retain more of their texture.

Several mummies found in caves, very high in the mountains, attest to that. They are quite ancient.

Drying meat - jerky - is a similar process, but it does not ever become tender again, no matter how long you soak it or simmer, will not soften its leathery soul.

Posted by: Common Tater at December 05, 2022 10:48 AM (hSyuk)

294 Since the estate spent $24K for my MIL's second husband's funeral while her funeral cost around $8k added to the fact that we did not contest the inlaws claim to their father's massive collection of stuff we figure the $60k should be divided by 3 instead of 8. Opinions welcomed
Posted by: Puddinhead

Depends on state law there. It gets sticky with second marriages and depends on how the assets were held. Legal claims are often not the same as moral claims. Morally, given the circumstances, I would argue that you would be correct but legally if the assets were held in common in the marriage absent a will's provisions, then you get wonky legal results without valuing the assets of the step father in law including whatever massive collection exists.

Consult a lawyer that specializes in estates now as they can outline your options in a state given your specific circumstances.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:48 AM (bDjBG)

295 Sometimes the most interesting thing about this place is the unexpected directions that a thread can take. And finding out who holds what obscure bit of knowledge.

No reference is too obscure for the Horde. It's great.
Posted by: Ian S.

I've said it for years. The breadth and depth of knowledge here is downright scary at times. You think you've found some new hobby or activity, only to find six Morons have been doing it for a decade.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:49 AM (9uCBG)

296 I wake up each morning, I dust off my wits,
I open the paper, and I read the obits.
If I’m not there, I know I’m not dead,
So I eat a good breakfast and go back to bed.

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:49 AM (27fX8)

297 Mmm. Incan mummies.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:49 AM (Vwz3I)

298 Do old people decompose faster than young people? How about fat v skinny? Do alcoholics have a little staying power?

When I'm gone, light my toe on fire. You'll be able to read by the light of my corpse for a week.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at December 05, 2022 10:49 AM (e+csY)

299 Walter Goggins was the only part of Fat Man that was really funny, but I liked watching Santa turn into Odin.

Posted by: Bourbonchicken at December 05, 2022 10:49 AM (44ww/)

300 That is skinny santa. He doesn't become jolly until he gets fat. Then he adopts a pseudo jolly attitude to hide his feeling of shame. He is really unhappy because he is far, and fat because he is unhappy. It is a viscous cycle.
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy, Set the Earth to

Santa is a terrorist. He's a fat, judgmental asshole who thinks he has the moral right to decide which kids are good and which ones are bad. That show Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer proves that Santa hates kids. Look at the misfit toys...
Charlie in the box.. A sentient jack in the box that announced its name? That needs a flame thrower!
Dolly? Can't see anything obviously wrong with her. Internet search tells me she has emotional issues. Great psycho doll drops in and murders everyone before the dessert! Nope!
A bird that swims? The elf that threw toys out of the sleigh didn't give it an umbrella! Kids are gonna wake up to a bird splattered all over the living room!
Merry fucking Christmas!

Posted by: Madamemayhem (uppity wench) at December 05, 2022 10:49 AM (Wy1BU)

301 I've said it for years. The breadth and depth of knowledge here is downright scary at times. You think you've found some new hobby or activity, only to find six Morons have been doing it for a decade.
Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:49 AM (9uCBG)

Not to brag or anything, but I've watched a lot of TV.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 05, 2022 10:50 AM (UuD2k)

302 Drying meat - jerky - is a similar process,

but it does not ever become tender again, no matter how long you soak it or simmer, will not soften its leathery soul.
Posted by: Common Tater

Just like Nancy Pelosi!

Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:50 AM (9uCBG)

303 277. What are the state's intestate succession laws?

Posted by: Lola at December 05, 2022 10:51 AM (NIYa7)

304 Mmm. Incan mummies.

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:49 AM (Vwz3I)

"That's a good lookin' mummy."

-Bill Clinton-

Posted by: BignJames at December 05, 2022 10:51 AM (AwYPR)

305 Sound advice. My husband and I were asked to be the 96yo cousin's "executors", we turned it down for exactly this reason.
Posted by: CN

Being an executor is often being a pinata for the disputing parties to blame for any settlement of the estate. Best way for parents to ensure wishes is to use alternative means to bypass probate if possible such as beneficiary deeds to real property and the like. Probate is essentially a built up set of relatively inflexible provisions in order to protect each descendant's rights and derived from various attempts by heirs to cheat each other. Under such a system, being an executor is often a thankless task especially for a penniless estate.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:51 AM (bDjBG)

306 Consult a lawyer that specializes in estates now as they can outline your options in a state given your specific circumstances.
------------------
Yeah, I agree, but my wife has the check writing privileges between the two executors. The will of the long lost cousin specifies the money to offspring of her relatives. The terms c/o Care of deligates her three offspring, making no mention of the inlaws.

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 10:51 AM (HTCOy)

307 Oh yes, I like the painting. The painter did a lot of interior scenes. I think he was from the 1720-1740s or so but somebody has probably already said, and I can't be sure without looking it up.

The reminds me of Saint which RefMindBlueState brought up to me. St Nektrios of Aegina. He was a Greek Orthodox priest and monk and Bishop and died about 1920. There is a movie about him, "Man of God". This credited with a miracle after he died because when they went to prepare his body in the hospital they threw his cloak or robe on the bed of a paralytic in the next bed and he immediately was healed. That saint wasn't around for the guy in the picture:

tinyurl.com/2826fx4y

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 05, 2022 10:52 AM (vH/6k)

308 Is Incan Pie as good as Pecan Pie?

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 10:53 AM (HTCOy)

309 I've said it for years. The breadth and depth of knowledge here is downright scary at times. You think you've found some new hobby or activity, only to find six Morons have been doing it for a decade.
Posted by: rickb223 at December 05, 2022 10:49 AM (9uCBG)

-----------

Take sex with toasters, for instance.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at December 05, 2022 10:53 AM (Qzn2/)

310 267
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 05, 2022 10:41 AM (6teN/)

Fenelon -Once again you step up to be the Horde's spiritual advisor and chaplain. I'm sure I speak for all here - THANK YOU for what you do, for the witness and example you provide, and for your prayers. God Bless you.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at December 05, 2022 10:53 AM (N39Ws)

311 What if the NC electric system sabotage is in memory of George Floyd?

That will make it okay, right?

Posted by: blaster at December 05, 2022 10:54 AM (pwExq)

312 "Not responsible for any debts but my own"

Remember, up until the 1830s or thereabouts, the heir to an estate also inherited whatever debts had accrued as well as any assets. Debtors prisons were common, too.

SO - after the estate was settled, you could find yourself on the hook for thousands. That blurb in the newspaper was probably related to that legal reality, or distinguishing between those who were and weren't subject to those provisions. I suppose there was a cutoff date.

Posted by: Common Tater at December 05, 2022 10:54 AM (hSyuk)

313 Is Incan Pie as good as Pecan Pie?

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 10:53 AM (HTCOy)

I prefer Eskimo Pie.

Posted by: BignJames at December 05, 2022 10:54 AM (AwYPR)

314 Pies that come in boxes are better than those that come incans.

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:54 AM (27fX8)

315 The real Saint Nicholas was actually a very interesting man. The only connection with the caricature was that they were both supposedly generous. The feast day of St Nicholas is tomorrow.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 05, 2022 10:54 AM (vH/6k)

316 Then there was those Himalayan climbers who decided to freeze spelling out the letters Y-M-C-A.
______________

We will never make to the top of Mt. Everest with Paralyzed Grandpa, what with Himalayan around such.

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at December 05, 2022 10:55 AM (lf83v)

317 Is Incan Pie as good as Pecan Pie?

It's pronounced EIN-kan.

Posted by: Oddbob at December 05, 2022 10:55 AM (nfrXX)

318 In-cahn pie or Ink-an pie??

Posted by: andycanuck (Vwz3I) at December 05, 2022 10:55 AM (Vwz3I)

319
Remember, up until the 1830s or thereabouts, the heir to an estate also inherited whatever debts had accrued as well as any assets. Debtors prisons were common, too.

------

This is still of drug dealers, etc., in many cases. Pay your debts, or else, you know, the thing... and your family will still owe.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 05, 2022 10:55 AM (oINRc)

320 Roubini didn’t mince words. “The mother of all economic crises looms, and there will be little that policymakers can do about it,” he wrote.
________

All iz going egzactly to ze plan. *steeples fingers*
-Soros

Posted by: Chuck Martel at December 05, 2022 10:55 AM (fs1hN)

321 Is Incan Pie as good as Pecan Pie?
Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 10:53 AM (HTCOy)

Now you've opened the discussion about pronouncing it ING-can, or ing-CAN, or IN-can.

Posted by: Wally at December 05, 2022 10:55 AM (FJYfm)

322 Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:51 AM (bDjBG)

At this point, her remaining assets are objects in her apartment, some jewelry, some art, some expensive furnishings and silver. We know that she has promised these to multiple people, who all probably have emails to that effect. We do not want to get in the middle of these arguments, nor do we want the responsibility of shipping large items or storing them for when it's settled. She was pissed, but who cares.

Posted by: CN at December 05, 2022 10:55 AM (Zzbjj)

323 The Soros-funded Project Syndicate released a Dec. 2 column by New York University Professor Emeritus of Economics Nouriel Roubini headlined: “The Unavoidable Crash.” Roubini wrote that years of frivolous fiscal, monetary and credit policies compounded by major negative supply shocks have significantly damaged the world economy, including the U.S.: “Stagflationary pressures are now putting the squeeze on a massive mountain of public- and private-sector debt.” Roubini didn’t mince words. “The mother of all economic crises looms, and there will be little that policymakers can do about it,” he wrote.
Posted by: SMOD at December 05, 2022 10:45 AM (RHGPo

Well, they don’t call him Doctor Doom due to his cheerful personality.

Posted by: Tofer732 at December 05, 2022 10:56 AM (fatpD)

324 Now you've opened the discussion about pronouncing it ING-can, or ing-CAN, or IN-can.
Posted by: Wally at December 05, 2022 10:55 AM (FJYfm)

Not to mention the proper pronunciation of pecan.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at December 05, 2022 10:56 AM (N39Ws)

325 Don't tell me what's in an Incan Pie. I don't want to know.

Posted by: Chuck Martel at December 05, 2022 10:56 AM (fs1hN)

326 Wakes up
Scratches
Looks around
Dang. Late again. Oh well.
Goes looking for coffee.

Posted by: Diogenes at December 05, 2022 10:56 AM (anj39)

327 Weren't we also supposed to have run out food by now?

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at December 05, 2022 10:56 AM (lf83v)

328 The feast day of St Nicholas is tomorrow.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 05, 2022 10:54 AM (vH/6k)

I'll bring the potato salad.

Posted by: Hillary Clinton giving you the side eye at December 05, 2022 10:56 AM (1Yy3c)

329 311 What if the NC electric system sabotage is in memory of George Floyd?
--------------------
Did you notice how flakey the reporting on this has been? The subject is about a shot up electrial equipment and not about looting the gun stores. Methinks we have a new slave revolt on our hands. If it isn't Indians killing us its the slaves. Seems Kalorama and Black Lesbian Mayors are up to something again.

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 10:56 AM (HTCOy)

330 ... what with Himalayan around such.
Posted by: Adirondack Patriot

*******

Snort!!

Posted by: Muldoon at December 05, 2022 10:56 AM (ykeLU)

331 303 277. What are the state's intestate succession laws?
Posted by: Lola

Lola, one of the reasons to consult a lawyer is that the statutory law is interpreted by court decisions. The statutes are easy enough nowadays to find online for free but the case law that serves judges in applying that statutory law to your circumstances requires a lawyer experienced with estate law to cut through the thicket.

Far too many people try to cheap out by using Uncle Freddie who does some other unrelated law for advice or reading the plain letter of the statute and figuring that is it. Hire an estate lawyer even if expensive at the time for both estate planning for yourself (and spouse) and for probate advice inheritances.

Pay the freight for the specialist or risk losing what you want in court. Good legal advice prior to any court action is best so you can avoid traps in the law.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:57 AM (bDjBG)

332 Not to mention the proper pronunciation of pecan.
Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at December 05, 2022 10:56 AM (N39Ws)

Pfft. Everyone knows its peekin pie.

Posted by: blaster at December 05, 2022 10:57 AM (pwExq)

333 Not to mention the proper pronunciation of pecan.
Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at December 05, 2022 10:56 AM (N39Ws)

Trick to remembering that is a pee can is the thing you leave under the bed, not what you put in pies.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 05, 2022 10:57 AM (UuD2k)

334 Posted by: creeper at December 05, 2022 10:44 AM (cTCuP

Creeper- it's what in your heart that matters and you have a kindly heart and prayerful spirit for your brother in Christ here on the AOS board.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 05, 2022 10:57 AM (vH/6k)

335 Shit is getting dicey in Brazil 🇧🇷 military whacked some Red Command cartel leaders that supported Lula.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at December 05, 2022 10:57 AM (0ZuC6)

336
Better than being frozen acting out a scene from "Brokeback Mountin' II: Him-A-Layin' Rodeo," but not by much.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 05, 2022 10:57 AM (oINRc)

337 I prefer to pronounce it “Inca-dinca-doo.”

— Jimmy Durante

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 10:58 AM (27fX8)

338 Off drunken whore sock!

Posted by: Robert - Metallica, 72 Seasons, out 4/14 at December 05, 2022 10:58 AM (1Yy3c)

339 314 Pies that come in boxes are better than those that come incans.
--------------
Incan boxes are bit too dry.

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 10:59 AM (HTCOy)

340 At this point, her remaining assets are objects in her apartment, some jewelry, some art, some expensive furnishings and silver. We know that she has promised these to multiple people, who all probably have emails to that effect. We do not want to get in the middle of these arguments, nor do we want the responsibility of shipping large items or storing them for when it's settled. She was pissed, but who cares.
Posted by: CN

People often get more bent out of shape over a piece of jewelry, some ancestor's picture, or some other bric a brac than money. Probate court is where dirty laundry and character of each potential heir are revealed. In your case, you would literally be the pinata that whatever decision you made, would piss off other family members. Not a good place to be.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:59 AM (bDjBG)

341 What if the NC electric system sabotage is in memory of George Floyd?

That will make it okay, right?

The reporting's been really spotty on that, probably to feed the many BlueAnon conspiracy theories about it.

Posted by: Ian S. at December 05, 2022 10:59 AM (ZGrMX)

342 335 Shit is getting dicey in Brazil 🇧🇷 military whacked some Red Command cartel leaders that supported Lula.
-----------------
Good. Too bad our militias are not up to the job.

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 11:00 AM (HTCOy)

343 Shit is getting dicey in Brazil 🇧🇷 military whacked some Red Command cartel leaders that supported Lula.

Oh, that's interesting.

Posted by: Ian S. at December 05, 2022 11:00 AM (ZGrMX)

344 NOOD.

Posted by: Bulgaroctonus at December 05, 2022 11:00 AM (27fX8)

345 Nood Buck sans monkey.

Posted by: Robert - Metallica, 72 Seasons, out 4/14 at December 05, 2022 11:01 AM (1Yy3c)

346 Trick to remembering that is a pee can is the thing you leave under the bed, not what you put in pies.
-----------------
Pee-cans are known as honey pots.

Posted by: Puddinhead at December 05, 2022 11:01 AM (HTCOy)

347 I saw Rudolf on TV last week. It seems someone has remastered it. The detail is breathtaking.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at December 05, 2022 11:02 AM (e+csY)

348 Yeah, I agree, but my wife has the check writing privileges between the two executors. The will of the long lost cousin specifies the money to offspring of her relatives. The terms c/o Care of deligates her three offspring, making no mention of the inlaws. Posted by: Puddinhead
------------------------------
Wow. Complicated stuff. I think you have a moral claim but the inlaws may try to make a claim on the assets so be prepared for a legal fight. Consult an experienced estate lawyer now because when a court challenge exists, the rates usually increase for the lawyer as they are also preparing for litigation. Often a warning letter from a lawyer representing you might forestall a legal action from them because it will outline what the lawyer believes the law is and tend to fend off challenges by other lawyers if it is a fair summary of the law.
Make sure though you consult a lawyer in the state where the will is to be probated though if it differs and it does not hurt to consult a lawyer in the county/jurisdiction of the court where the will is to be probated as well. Lawyers have tight knit legal communities based on jurisdictions that outsiders often find at a cost.

Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 11:06 AM (bDjBG)

349 Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at December 05, 2022 10:53 AM (N39Ws

Thanks. I just feel badly for people in this position. It's a bit easier when death is expected and a relief but in these situations it's just agonizing. And it's nice if you to call me the chaplain here. It's not a mantle I have ever assumed to take here even when I coordinated the prayer list, and some people have told me "Your not my minister or chaplain /priest and/or I don't need one." Ok that's fine. Undetstandable It just that after being in pastoral ministry for so long,trying to find some words that
fit when one is speechless can be helpful.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 05, 2022 11:06 AM (vH/6k)

350 Not a good place to be.
Posted by: whig at December 05, 2022 10:59 AM (bDjBG)

This is our thought. And most of the stuff was promised to several different people, including her late husband's relatives in Spain. No thanks.

Posted by: CN at December 05, 2022 11:07 AM (Zzbjj)

351 Less oxygen at altitude,

Posted by: Thomas Paine
---
Fewer

Posted by: Guy Who Thinks Its Always Fewer at December 05, 2022 11:08 AM (krQz2)

352 We watched Rudolf last night. On the DVD extras was one of the original promo spots - "Watch Rudolf on Sunday, December 4!"

Well, we did.

Posted by: Thomas Paine at December 05, 2022 11:08 AM (lTGtQ)

353 Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at December 05, 2022 10:53 AM (N39Ws

And God bless you too, dear one.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 05, 2022 11:14 AM (d1x9z)

354 The dog thinks, 'he better get on with it, I've got to get back to the poker game.'

Posted by: Jinx the Cat at December 05, 2022 11:16 AM (An9Yz)

355 Shit is getting dicey in Brazil 🇧🇷 military whacked some Red Command cartel leaders that supported Lula.
Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at December 05, 2022 10:57 AM (0ZuC6)

Well, that's a good start.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 05, 2022 11:22 AM (tkR6S)

356 I appreciate the update, polynokes although I am sorry that the procedure from your kidney stones are still causing problems. Will pray some more re. This latest setback.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 05, 2022 11:24 AM (ExP60)

357 331. Thank you. Yes, indeed, to your response; you're absolutely right. And not being a licensed attorney, I would not offer a legal opinion. (I was educated on that hazard.)

I was only responding to, Since the estate was for all the children the question is does the $60 get divided by the three blood relations or the total blood plus inlaw children of eight. We are of the opinion that it only includes the blood relatives not those of a separate marriage. But lawyers like things easy.
-----
Some lawyers do like things easy & allow families to fight it out for sometime before distribution is agreed upon & made, especially where estates that are not huge, only seeking additional time from the state for the family to resolve issues on its own. (By the time a 60K in $ estate is dragged through court, it's much less I imagine.) I guess it boils down to how spiteful and determined some 'concerned parties' may be.

Posted by: Lola at December 05, 2022 11:27 AM (NIYa7)

358 Making money online is more than $15k just by doing simple work from home. I received $18376 last month. It's an easy and simple job to do and its earnings are much better than regular office jobs and even a little child can do this and earn money. Everybody must try this job by just use the info on this page..... www.richsalaries.com

Posted by: Maria Harris at December 05, 2022 01:16 PM (sDrJY)

359 Sleeping Pills works better then bonking them on the head

Posted by: Tamaa the Drongo Bird at December 05, 2022 03:49 PM (FLiOE)

360 Praying for Christopher R. Taylor.
Posted by: That NLurker guy where's my Irene Adler? at December 05, 2022 10:05

What's up w/ Christopher, I missed the news.

Posted by: Farmer at December 05, 2022 08:59 PM (55Qr6)

361
Making money online is more than $15k just by doing simple work from home. I received $18376 last month. It's an easy and simple job to do and its earnings are much better than regular office jobs and even a little child can do this and earn money. Everybody must try this job by just use the info on this page..... www.worksful.com

Posted by: Erica Bryant at December 06, 2022 01:19 AM (xWbAr)

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