First-World Problems...

Sure...that means something...right? But this particular brand of automobile is too special to allow the basic car code reader to make heads or tails out of it. That would be too easy!

So the reasonably competent service station to which I brought the car for a couple of maintenance issues and to read the codes called me to tell me that everything was all set, but the fault reported was a "General Steering Wheel Fault." That meant nothing to them, and even less to me, so I had to spend some time on the internet trying to figure it out.

So according to the internet it is a fault in the turn signal lever or the wiper lever. Oh! That helps tremendously! But both work fine. Neither one sticks, all of the settings work correctly, the lights operate correctly, etc.

And to make it even more helpful there is no way to turn off the "Check Engine" light without the proprietary software from the manufacturer. That is a much larger issue than it seems at first glance...just ask the thousands of farmers who own John Deere equipment and are forced to use factory mechanics to repair their stuff, because of proprietary software that runs their tractors and combines.

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 That's me

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 02:00 PM (k8B25)

2 2nd

Posted by: jwmiii at August 07, 2022 02:02 PM (LUFT6)

3 hopefully it is still under warranty. Is sous vide the cooking equivalent of an EV?

Posted by: Pete Bog at August 07, 2022 02:02 PM (Jzz++)

4
If a sensor light comes on, there's a 5% chance that the component the code refers to is bad and a 95% chance the component is fine but the sensor is bad.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:02 PM (1Nxff)

5 Hadrian has it.

Posted by: epador at August 07, 2022 02:04 PM (ns4uC)

6 I dodged a big headache this week, storm on Thursday brought down a chunk of a dead tree next to house, didn't hit nothing. But now with some scaffolding from work can get the rest down.

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 02:04 PM (k8B25)

7 My CEL went on. It was determined to be the " eyesight" feature. Still waiting on some part, but it's very drivable

Posted by: CN at August 07, 2022 02:05 PM (VuQO/)

8 The epitome for me was the pressure sensor in my right front wheel causing the leak in said tire.

Posted by: epador at August 07, 2022 02:05 PM (ns4uC)

9 Our 2013 Jeep Grand Cherokee used to throw the CEL about once a week. One of the two catalytic converters was going bad. $1000 to replace.

Or

Buy a $25 OBDC code reader with CEL reset and fugetaboutit.

Cleared all the codes when we traded it in. Sorry, not sorry.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 07, 2022 02:06 PM (BFigT)

10 First thing anybody should do when they get a check engine light is make sure the gas cap is tight.

Posted by: Mark1971 at August 07, 2022 02:06 PM (xPl2J)

11 Is sous vide the cooking equivalent of an EV?

Posted by: Pete Bog at August 07, 2022 02:02 PM (Jzz++)

Sous Vide is the cooking equivalent of a gorgeous 40-something, dressing appropriately and beautifully, walking in elegant heels (not too tall and not too short) smiling at you as she sashays by...!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 07, 2022 02:06 PM (XIJ/X)

12 Two cars ago, the check engine light was on for nearly the entire time I owned the vehicle. Mechanic told me it was due to a faulty sensor, and not worth fixing.

My previous car, the check engine light came on toward the end of my ownership. Mechanic told me it was something that would affect my smog check results, so it would need to be dealt with. But it was buried in the engine, and expensive to reach. I put it off... which proved fortunate when someone ran a red light and totaled my car.

Posted by: junior at August 07, 2022 02:07 PM (bu/hI)

13 When my starting sequence was going but intermittently took it and without it doing they had no idea ( they said) without it doing it. Of course when it catastrophic went they knew what it was and had the parts on hand.

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 02:07 PM (k8B25)

14
a.k.a. The Money Light

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 02:07 PM (bSn9B)

15 1 cent fix - Black tape.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at August 07, 2022 02:07 PM (hwoGt)

16 But it was buried in the engine, and expensive to reach. I put it off... which proved fortunate when someone ran a red light and totaled my car.
Posted by: junior

Cloud, see silver lining - right?

Posted by: Tonypete at August 07, 2022 02:07 PM (LsEU/)

17 Check Engine? I called J.J. Walker to check my zip code.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at August 07, 2022 02:08 PM (63Dwl)

18 1 cent fix - Black tape.
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy

Wish I thought of that. I've been doing it the hard way - I drove a screwdriver through the CEL.

Posted by: Tonypete at August 07, 2022 02:08 PM (LsEU/)

19 I have a data reader. It comes with a code book so you can interpret what the reader says. But, the most important thing it does?
Turns the damn warning light off.

Posted by: gourmand du jour, introspectively at August 07, 2022 02:08 PM (jTmQV)

20 My CEL is on for a penny ante thing that I don't care about, but Dodge makes me care because it disables remote start until the issue is fixed.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at August 07, 2022 02:09 PM (hwoGt)

21 Chicago Mayor's Plan to Sue Gang Members Goes Nowhere

-
I guess she'll have bring out the big guns and seek protection orders.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Now Is the Summer of Our Discontent n at August 07, 2022 02:09 PM (FVME7)

22 Last summer I had some body work done on my F150, on the side panel where the fuel door is. For weeks after my dash read CHECK FUEL CAP. Fuel cap was fine. I drove it like that til the next time I visited the mechanic. Cleared the code, code hasn't returned.

Posted by: DB at August 07, 2022 02:09 PM (geLO8)

23 Then DONT BUY JOHN FKN DEERE....

This idea Nanzi Piglozi is going to decide how each mfg creates and distributes is products is ABSURD.

We dont need a thing called the "Right to Repair." Govt will break everything.

Posted by: Fisht at August 07, 2022 02:10 PM (ZRarh)

24
The Check Engine light came on. Got told that the catalytic converter was bad. Did nothing about it. Car ran as before. A few months later the light went out just at the time the state inspection was due. Car passed inspection. Light came back on soon afterwards.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:10 PM (1Nxff)

25 It will only be a few months before incentives are offered or better yet prices come down.

I will purchase a new vehicle. One of the predicates will be fewer chip assisted devices or the ability to turn them off.

Posted by: Braenyard at August 07, 2022 02:10 PM (85PWb)

26
If a sensor light comes on, there's a 5% chance that the component the code refers to is bad and a 95% chance the component is fine but the sensor is bad.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

I'd say 95% it is a WIRE-related issue. Either a Short or an Open or a bad ground or a loose connection.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 02:10 PM (bSn9B)

27 duct tape comes in lots of pretty colors today

Posted by: john at August 07, 2022 02:10 PM (NeuXk)

28 A few months later the light went out just at the time the state inspection was due. Car passed inspection. Light came back on soon afterwards.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

You heard the heavenly choir singing at that moment, didn't you?

Posted by: Tonypete at August 07, 2022 02:11 PM (LsEU/)

29
Sous Vide is the cooking equivalent of a gorgeous 40-something, dressing appropriately and beautifully, walking in elegant heels (not too tall and not too short) smiling at you as she sashays by...!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 07, 2022 02:06 PM (XIJ/X)

_________

And says to you, "Can you introduce me to J.J. Sefton?"

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:11 PM (1Nxff)

30 Turns the damn warning light off.

Posted by: gourmand du jour, introspectively at August 07, 2022 02:08 PM (jTmQV)

Not on this car...

Which is really irritating.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 07, 2022 02:12 PM (XIJ/X)

31 You would think that with all of the computers and displays cars have that it could just tell you what the hell is wrong. No. It has to be a woman about it.

Check engine
What is wrong?
If you were paying attention you would know what is wrong.
No, just give me a hint?
Ok P1755
What?
See. This is what is wrong with our marriage.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at August 07, 2022 02:12 PM (hwoGt)

32 Here in California that check engine light means you cannot get your car smogged and/or registered until whatever is setting off the light is fixed. Doesn't matter if it has nothing to do with O2 sensors on your intake or exhaust/smog BS, you're screwed. Doesn't matter if you take it too a smog station and they check the codes and has nothing to do with exhaus/smog, you're screwed. They can reset it for you but whatever it is the check engine light cannot come back on for 150 miles. If it stays off you're golden, if not still screwed.

Posted by: JROD at August 07, 2022 02:12 PM (0jZnq)

33 I own and maintain a 2003 Volkswagen Passat. Most people don't realize it, but "passat" is actually the German word for "check engine light." As in, "I see your Passat is illuminated, that will likely be quite expensive. "

Posted by: Slowroll at August 07, 2022 02:12 PM (vAHT7)

34 Yep, check engine lights are a load of garbage. You can get one if your gas tank cap was not put on correctly.

Posted by: JustSo at August 07, 2022 02:13 PM (fdpot)

35 The Mazda used to give me overdrive off and would shift rough. So I rebooted the car. Take off the battery cable and let it sir five minutes. Put the cable back on and start the car.

Posted by: Notsothoreau at August 07, 2022 02:13 PM (9WSy4)

36 Just installed a new stereo in my Ford Focus and for the second vehicle in a row, cant get the steering wheel controls to work. I bought the proper harness (I think) and the Canbus module and the shit just refuses to work. Has anyone installed a stereo with SWC and got them to work?

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at August 07, 2022 02:13 PM (h1jJh)

37 Here in California that check engine light means you cannot get your car smogged and/or registered until whatever is setting off the light is fixed.. . . ..
Posted by: JROD

"Here in California"

I believe we have identified the problem.

jk but you already know all about your state.

Posted by: Tonypete at August 07, 2022 02:14 PM (LsEU/)

38 Which guy is Engine?

Posted by: Hanson Brother at August 07, 2022 02:14 PM (oTZbj)

39 Usta be that CEL meant check the engine/ emission system. Now it comes on if the rear seat fart sensor is bad.

Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at August 07, 2022 02:14 PM (hwoGt)

40
I'd say 95% it is a WIRE-related issue. Either a Short or an Open or a bad ground or a loose connection.
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 02:10 PM (bSn9B)

_________

Quite so, but the point remains, don't get a catalytic converter just because the code says so.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:15 PM (1Nxff)

41 33 I own and maintain a 2003 Volkswagen Passat. Most people don't realize it, but "passat" is actually the German word for "check engine light." As in, "I see your Passat is illuminated, that will likely be quite expensive. "

I used a bit of black tape to decorate my passat

Posted by: BlackOrchid at August 07, 2022 02:15 PM (w0NJk)

42
"Here in California"

I believe we have identified the problem.

jk but you already know all about your state.
Posted by: Tonypete at August 07, 2022 02:14 PM (LsEU/)

__________

Same in Texas.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:16 PM (1Nxff)

43 Idiot lights.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at August 07, 2022 02:16 PM (g8uGN)

44 11 Is sous vide the cooking equivalent of an EV?
Posted by: Pete Bog at August 07, 2022 02:02 PM (Jzz++)

Sous Vide is the cooking equivalent of a gorgeous 40-something, dressing appropriately and beautifully, walking in elegant heels (not too tall and not too short) smiling at you as she sashays by...!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 07, 2022 02:06 PM (XIJ/X)

...and you glance down and notice her bulging package.

Posted by: goozer at August 07, 2022 02:16 PM (PtK0Q)

45 I love my car except for the fact that I can't replace the driver side headlight without removing the damn battery, which means you have no means to check the alignment of the light until you put the damn battery back in, and if the alignment isn't so good, out comes the battery again...
It makes me have unkind thoughts.

Posted by: gourmand du jour, introspectively at August 07, 2022 02:16 PM (jTmQV)

46 I have one of those permanent engine codes in my Mazda right now. The relevant work was done long ago, yet the orange light remains...

Posted by: CppThis at August 07, 2022 02:17 PM (UewuT)

47 The registration issue is not just in California. It will be in any city that requires inspection prior to registration. If that is CBDs cars, and by the looks of the yard photos he posts, I think he will be required to have the check engine light off before next registration of the vehicle.

Posted by: David Prince at August 07, 2022 02:17 PM (WUxVt)

48 Who knew Blago was funny?

https://bit.ly/3PaVPxU

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Now Is the Summer of Our Discontent n at August 07, 2022 02:18 PM (FVME7)

49 Car passed inspection. Light came back on soon afterwards.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:10 PM (1Nxff)
------------

Cha-ching.

Mine came on, oh dread. Went to AutoZone, their reader said it was the thermostat. Really? My truck knows when the primitive, mechanical thermostat is going bad? Bah.

So, I replaced the thermostat and all the fluid. May as well replace all the fluid, it's a Ford. Lo and behold, it was the thermostat.

Posted by: Braenyard at August 07, 2022 02:18 PM (85PWb)

50 Last week at a electric fillup station posted there was a Porche and wondered what it costs, seems its a hybrid and runs $86,400

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 02:18 PM (k8B25)

51 Who knew Blago was funny?

https://bit.ly/3PaVPxU

I can't say I found him very funny as governor while I lived there.

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at August 07, 2022 02:19 PM (ZSK0i)

52
Quite so, but the point remains, don't get a catalytic converter just because the code says so.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh

Exactly.

A common code is for a O2 Sensor. It is almost NEVER a O2 sensor problem.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 02:20 PM (bSn9B)

53 Czeck engines blow chunks

Posted by: REDACTED at August 07, 2022 02:20 PM (us2H3)

54 I can't say I find the whole "check engine" paradigm amusing. These days, you have to assume it means your oil pump's failed when it might just be the gas cap.

Talk about crying wolf.

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent, STEM Guy at August 07, 2022 02:21 PM (ZSK0i)

55 Absolutely nailed what I've got going on. For some odd reason, the newer more expensive cars have decided to not let you know just WTF is going on, and prefers a /!\. So, my Lexus RC just flashed a little yellow exclamation point, the manual says take it to the dealership. Meanwhile, my ancient Infiniti M45 says shit like "oil maintenance" with a little picture of an oil can or oil filter. No doubt, that's what's up with the Lexus, but if I get the oil changed elsewhere and that's not it...

I can't even imagine the true horrors of a Tesla. Just saw a video of a guy who took his new (used) Tesla in for an "update" and they noticed his 90 battery should really be a 60, so they literally took away 30% of his range and told him they "fixed a problem". For $1400, they'll fix it even better and give him back what they took away.

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at August 07, 2022 02:22 PM (zB/T/)

56 I think there is a liquid from the auto parts store that, when poured into the gas tank, will clear up the catalytic problem for a short period of time.

Long enough to get past the inspection.

Posted by: Braenyard at August 07, 2022 02:22 PM (85PWb)

57 32 Here in California that check engine light means you cannot get your car smogged and/or registered until whatever is setting off the light is fixed. Doesn't matter if it has nothing to do with O2 sensors on your intake or exhaust/smog BS, you're screwed. Doesn't matter if you take it too a smog station and they check the codes and has nothing to do with exhaus/smog, you're screwed. They can reset it for you but whatever it is the check engine light cannot come back on for 150 miles. If it stays off you're golden, if not still screwed.
Posted by: JROD at August 07, 2022 02:12 PM (0jZnq)

The first three words in your comment is your main problem.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at August 07, 2022 02:23 PM (Qhnrt)

58 Not on this car...

Which is really irritating.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo
____________

Maybe this will help...

https://tinyurl.com/yvactpym

(Amazon)

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 07, 2022 02:23 PM (BFigT)

59
Check Engine!

"Well, it's still there."

*drops hood back down*

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:23 PM (1Nxff)

60 Teslas look like hostages with tape over their mouths.

Posted by: Braenyard at August 07, 2022 02:26 PM (85PWb)

61
Nothing will "erase" a code if the issue is not fixed.

You can "clear" a code, but only temporarily.
The ECU/ECM runs periodic systems checks for certain miles/drive cycles. That's why the light re-illuminates after a while.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 02:27 PM (bSn9B)

62 Here's my (sorta) FWP: I bought an office chair, and more recently a new workbench stool, and both sit too high.

Now I'm not short (over six feet), but my feet barely touch the floor with the office chair, and my knees cannot fit under the workbench on the workbench stool. (Both in the lowest position of the seat.)

Who the hell did the Chinese use for an ergonomic model? Yao Ming? They seem to think all Westerners are eight feet tall.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara - Impeach Joe Biden at August 07, 2022 02:28 PM (0A3LU)

63 @37 Tonypete-Yep, California. Haven't been able to get an address in another state to use to get out of atrocious registration fees like a lot of other people I know do.
I also thought(my next problem, thinking) that they just shoved that sensor thing in your tail pipe(car, not ass) and thats how they measured emissions. The year before last the smog station I went to did that and my vehicles are still fairly new. I guess it was just habit for the smog guy because that is only used on certain vintage of cars. I went a month ago to take care of my 4Runner that has had a re-occurring electrical problem that cannot seem to be fixed by Toyota. Doesn't matter. When they hook up the vehicle to their computer, it sends info straight to DMV and its DMV that says it's ok or not. Has nothing to do with smog guy so you can't even slip them pizza or a six pack of beer to look the other way.

Posted by: JROD at August 07, 2022 02:29 PM (0jZnq)

64 We have no vehicle inspections here in OK. Our legislature rightfully recognized them as criminal rackets.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at August 07, 2022 02:29 PM (Qhnrt)

65 I had new tires installed a couple of days ago. When I picked the car up, just at closing time of the shop, I couldn't start it.
Fortunately I have one of those mini boosters packs so I got it going only to find the check engine light and check vehicle stability control light on. I couldn't get them but the vehicle seemed fine.
Yesterday the vehicle stability control light was off, but the check engine light was on.
Today the check engine light was also off. Shakes head.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, there are chickens in my trench at August 07, 2022 02:29 PM (eGTCV)

66
What I did is join a Forum for all the idiots like myself who bought the same car as me. Then we have a place to commiserate and compare notes.

Hopefully another idiot on a car forum with the same car as you had this same issue resolved.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 02:31 PM (bSn9B)

67 I'm paying $1350 tomorrow to get rid of a airbag seatbelt warning on my car so it will pass safety inspection, so I feel you.

I've had the issue since May and theoretically, the airbags may or may not have been a problem without the sensor fixed...but I refused to pay in advance (b/c the $900 part is special order so it needs to be paid before work) til I had to...

Posted by: Nova local at August 07, 2022 02:32 PM (exHjb)

68 Taiwan's chink light is glowing red

Posted by: REDACTED at August 07, 2022 02:32 PM (us2H3)

69 Few weeks ago read a article that ECars have a much bigger return to dealer % than gasoline cars

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 02:32 PM (k8B25)

70 My FWP isn't a problem anymore. Finally got my coupons from J M Smuckers Co. for all the recalled Jiff peanut butter we turned in. Basically I got a twofer because I not only filled out the form at their web site, I also took the jars of peanut butter to Walmart and got reimbursed for them.

Was that wrong of me?

Posted by: That Guy What Always Says Yeah Buddy TM at August 07, 2022 02:32 PM (R5lpX)

71 This is why the Lone Ranger was worried about Tonto. His Check Injun light came on.

Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenko Solutions at August 07, 2022 02:33 PM (kPy0C)

72 adding to #20 above, the check engine light, which is really just an emission system error, is more infuriating nanny state bullshit, and is even worse than failing smog inspection. I was watching a car wizard video and he mentioned a couple examples where features in the car are disabled until *emissions* issue is fixed, e.g , chevy trucks disable ac, Subaru throws abs errors, etc. So we have carmakers actually fucking punishing us until we fix some bullshit fartgas issue.

Posted by: Drink Like Vikings at August 07, 2022 02:34 PM (uTvxb)

73 >>> 64 We have no vehicle inspections here in OK. Our legislature rightfully recognized them as criminal rackets.
Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at August 07, 2022 02:29 PM (Qhnrt)

This needs to be publicized so the SEEFTY!! Karens avoid driving through your state at all costs. Maybe put billboards up at the state borders facing the incoming lanes of all interstates, US and state highways. In fact I think we should do the same in TX.

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at August 07, 2022 02:35 PM (llON8)

74 I have a module that plugs into the port under the dash that reads the engine codes and displays them on my phone via blue tooth. There are many good apps you can download that are pretty useful. The good apps wont only tell you the code number but they will look it up and explain it in English. There is a ton of information stored on your cars CPU.

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at August 07, 2022 02:35 PM (h1jJh)

75
Today the check engine light was also off. Shakes head.
Posted by: N.L. Urker

They drained your battery, which is probably weak, anyway. Maybe they had your trunk or door open for a long time.

How old is your battery?

* a weak battery will sometime cause codes because voltage is too low.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 02:36 PM (bSn9B)

76 My CEL is on for a penny ante thing that I don't care about, but Dodge makes me care because it disables remote start until the issue is fixed.
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at August 07, 2022 02:09 PM (hwoGt)

At some point the CNC - Milling movement will start building aftermarket engines for cars built after 2000

Imagine a slant six for a Saab.

Posted by: Kindltot at August 07, 2022 02:36 PM (xhaym)

77 Subaru has proprietary domain of their AWD transmission parts & repairs. Only through licensed dealerships can Subaru parts be shipped and there are no aftermarket parts available. Discovered this when the tranny on my 2012 Outback started slipping just after 103,000 miles. Eventually reached a settlement with Subaru over the whole thing, got my trans fixed and later that year my (dealer maintained and paid-off) Outback was totaled by an F-250.

Posted by: BonHagar at August 07, 2022 02:36 PM (ELE8m)

78
Hopefully another idiot on a car forum with the same car as you had this same issue resolved.
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 02:31 PM (bSn9B)

___________

I hate trying to figure out online how to fix a problem and the only thing is forums. Having a problem with my computer? Answers on forums are something like: "Why would you do that?" "Download my product!" "Shoulda bought a Mac."

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:37 PM (1Nxff)

79 right, you can ignore that one.

Posted by: runner at August 07, 2022 02:38 PM (V13WU)

80 you can't bother yourself with every little light that goes on and off...and on and off

Posted by: runner at August 07, 2022 02:39 PM (V13WU)

81 There is a ton of information stored on your cars CPU.

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at August 07, 2022 02:35 PM (h1jJh)

And that right there should scare the shit out of everyone.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at August 07, 2022 02:39 PM (Qhnrt)

82
We have no vehicle inspections here in OK. Our legislature rightfully recognized them as criminal rackets.
Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at August 07, 2022 02:29 PM (Qhnrt)

_________

It would be one thing if the racket actually forced people to drive safe cars but the rolling wrecks I see on the roads here in TX tell me it's not just a racket but a useless racket.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:40 PM (1Nxff)

83
And that right there should scare the shit out of everyone.
Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at August 07, 2022 02:39 PM (Qhnrt)

_________

Code XW8936: Non-Spousal Female in Passenger Seat

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:41 PM (1Nxff)

84 A better safety precaution is not letting in illegals that have no ins, drive drunk, etc...

Posted by: Drink Like Vikings at August 07, 2022 02:43 PM (uTvxb)

85 Can never be too sure > Good enough for government work

Posted by: San Franpsycho at August 07, 2022 02:43 PM (EZebt)

86 And to make it even more helpful there is no way to turn off the "Check Engine" light without the proprietary software from the manufacturer. That is a much larger issue than it seems at first glance...just ask the thousands of farmers who own John Deere equipment and are forced to use factory mechanics to repair their stuff, because of proprietary software that runs their tractors and combines.

Posted by: CBD at 02:00 PM

Part and parcel of the "you'll own nothing and like it" philosophy.
Same thing with the "subscription" of features that are built into the car but which you have to pay ongoing fees for.

I'm a little suprised that outlaw mechanics aren't more popular and suspect it's only a matter of time before hacking of software becomes not only more common, but not frowned upon by the majority of people.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at August 07, 2022 02:43 PM (MFphb)

87 something is wrong with vehicle inspection in CO, because I see cars driving the streets with bumpers missing, saw a car with no engine hood once, and I've seen paper tags months and months past expiration date
I even see cars with no tags at all

Posted by: DB at August 07, 2022 02:43 PM (geLO8)

88 If a sensor light comes on, there's a 5% chance that the component the code refers to is bad and a 95% chance the component is fine but the sensor is bad.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:02 PM (1Nxff)

What we need are sensors to monitor the condition of the sensors, and possibly additional sensors to monitor those sensors.

Posted by: Sticky Wicket at August 07, 2022 02:43 PM (CCf67)

89 I occasionally rent a new car. The last one I rented overwhelmed me with all kinds of lights and sounds. I'm lucky I didn't kill us all coping with the various distractions...

Posted by: gourmand du jour, introspectively at August 07, 2022 02:43 PM (jTmQV)

90 CBD, try disconnecting you battery for a couple of minutes. Sometimes that will reset it.

Posted by: Hippopoonis at August 07, 2022 02:44 PM (JPVCx)

91 I even see cars with no tags at all
Posted by: DB at August 07, 2022 02:43 PM (geLO

_____________

That's a Baja California tag.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara - Impeach Joe Biden at August 07, 2022 02:44 PM (0A3LU)

92 My CEL came on so I took it to the dealer as it's still under warranty. Squirrels were building a nest in the engine compartment and chewing wires. Squirrel damage is not covered by the warranty.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at August 07, 2022 02:45 PM (u73oe)

93 My airbag light came on in my Wrangler. Intertubes tells me it's probably just a loose connection. Unfortunately you have to take the drivers seat out to get to it . One day I may have the motivation.

Posted by: Kilroy wasn't here at August 07, 2022 02:45 PM (BfhXc)

94
I've seen paper tags months and months past expiration date
I even see cars with no tags at all
Posted by: DB at August 07, 2022 02:43 PM (geLO

__________

I assume all paper plates are fake.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:45 PM (1Nxff)

95 I used a bit of black tape to decorate my passat
Posted by: BlackOrchid

woo-woo !

Posted by: JT at August 07, 2022 02:46 PM (T4tVD)

96 Sous Vide is the cooking equivalent of a gorgeous 40-something, dressing appropriately and beautifully, walking in elegant heels (not too tall and not too short) smiling at you as she sashays by...revealing a ghastly set of summer teeth. Summer there, some aren't!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 07, 2022 02:06 PM (XIJ/X)

fixed it for me.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at August 07, 2022 02:46 PM (MFphb)

97 I occasionally rent a new car. The last one I rented overwhelmed me with all kinds of lights and sounds. I'm lucky I didn't kill us all coping with the various distractions...
Posted by: gourmand du jour, introspectively at August 07, 2022 02:43 PM (jTmQV)
______________

It's a fad, much like websites that for a while used to have 17 overlays, pop-ups, and every other GD thing. Fortunately, that fad seems to have abated.

Pro tip derived from people going nuts with Powerpoint: just because you can do something doesn't mean you should.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara - Impeach Joe Biden at August 07, 2022 02:46 PM (0A3LU)

98 something is wrong with vehicle inspection in CO, because I see cars driving the streets with bumpers missing, saw a car with no engine hood once, and I've seen paper tags months and months past expiration date
I even see cars with no tags at all
Posted by: DB at August 07, 2022 02:43 PM (geLO

You just described Pennsylania....Land of Rusty Cars. I see the most amazing wrecks rolling around with up to date inspection stickers. Rust right through the body, all the way around, bald tires, cracked windshields, cracked exhaust pipes, (and thick white exhaust).

Posted by: Sticky Wicket at August 07, 2022 02:47 PM (CCf67)

99 Code XW8936: Non-Spousal Female in Passenger Seat
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:41 PM (1Nxff)

It's from the hoohah smell sensor imbedded in the upholstery.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at August 07, 2022 02:47 PM (Qhnrt)

100 Sous Vide is the cooking equivalent of a gorgeous 40-something, dressing appropriately and beautifully, walking in elegant heels (not too tall and not too short) smiling at you as she sashays by...!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 07, 2022 02:06 PM (XIJ/X)

Sous Vivid! You gave that some thought. I like to sous Vide but it doesn't hold a candle to a beautiful woman.

Posted by: Pete Bog at August 07, 2022 02:47 PM (Jzz++)

101 On my F-150, the brake light is on constantly. I don't pay attention to it because I happen to know that the problem is the sensor in the master cylinder and my mechanic from the Ford dealer told me it was ok to continue driving it.

Posted by: That Guy What Always Says Yeah Buddy TM at August 07, 2022 02:48 PM (R5lpX)

102 It's hard to fix when the problem is that the Check Engine light is what's wrong.

So our two grown adult in-town kids bought a pool for Milady and me. 12'x12' and a nice couple feet deep. Now all I have to do is lay down paving stones so you don't have to walk across the (burnt, dry) lawn, and run some electric line to the filter pump, and find a ladder so Milady and I don't kill ourselves getting in and out, and hook up an outdoor shower so one can rinse off after and...

Oh, yeah... what kinds of chemicals on what kind of schedule will we need?

Thanks, keeds.

Posted by: mindful webworker - ferts whirled plobrems at August 07, 2022 02:49 PM (+htsy)

103

I'd suck their brains out with a straw, sell the widows an orphans and go into South American zinc.

Posted by: City Gent at August 07, 2022 02:49 PM (q/5yl)

104 It's a fad, much like websites that for a while used to have 17 overlays, pop-ups, and every other GD thing. Fortunately, that fad seems to have abated.

Not for (I think) the Washington Examiner. When you open a link to one of their pages, you get flashing, strobing ads on the right hand side. They are so irritating, I immediately close the article as soon as I realize whose it is.

True, they get a click, but all of the people who paid to have an ad on that page lose out. Be better, Washington Examiner.

Posted by: Archimedes at August 07, 2022 02:50 PM (/NCI4)

105 >>On my F-150, the brake light is on constantly. I don't pay attention to it because ...

Posted by: That Guy What Always Says Yeah Buddy

yeah but the problem is that one day, you may have an actual brake system failure and you'll ignore it because you think it's a false alert

just sayin

Posted by: DB at August 07, 2022 02:52 PM (geLO8)

106 Come on CBD. There's a fuze for it somewhere. Just yank that bad boy.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 07, 2022 02:54 PM (anj39)

107 My advice is a piece of precisely cut black electrical tape.

Posted by: Yawrate at August 07, 2022 02:55 PM (518OI)

108 yeah but the problem is that one day, you may have an actual brake system failure and you'll ignore it because you think it's a false alert

just sayin
Posted by: DB at August 07, 2022 02:52 PM (geLO

**

Reckon I better hope they don't go out when I'm coming back down the mountain on those curvy roads.

Posted by: That Guy What Always Says Yeah Buddy TM at August 07, 2022 02:55 PM (R5lpX)

109
Speaking of Pennsylvania...

I was watching chimney/masonry videos yesterday and one guy was repairing a chimney in Pennsylvania where flues made of clay will disintegrate! And the mortar in the brick-joint also disintegrate.

And I thought Massachusetts was bad for destroying things...

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 02:55 PM (bSn9B)

110 Well, let's start with year, make, model, engine, trans, oh, and what code ?

Posted by: Edward Lunny at August 07, 2022 02:55 PM (NBpxa)

111 CBD, try disconnecting you battery for a couple of minutes. Sometimes that will reset it.
Posted by: Hippopoonis at August 07, 2022 02:44 PM (JPVCx)

The ECM/ECU scans all the sensors and if there IS an issue, the light will come back on. No getting around it.

Posted by: thatcrazyjerseyguy at August 07, 2022 02:55 PM (Zvtjl)

112
yeah but the problem is that one day, you may have an actual brake system failure and you'll ignore it because you think it's a false alert

just sayin
Posted by: DB

Yeah, but if your brake light comes on because you have no brakes, it's too late, anyway.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 02:56 PM (bSn9B)

113

I'm sorry CBD, I can't do that...

Posted by: ECM 9000 at August 07, 2022 02:57 PM (q/5yl)

114 anyway, I just had my F150 in the shop for oil change, new plugs, new plug wires, new fuel filter, new air filter, service the trans, transfer case, and cooling system

ready for the 2nd 100K miles
this is my last truck- runs great- at a stoplight @500rpm, you have to look at the tach to remind you it's running

Posted by: DB at August 07, 2022 02:57 PM (geLO8)

115 I'm betting its either an Audi VW or other VW based product which are notorious for having bad clock springs that are always on corporate backorder. They seldom fix the many VW flaws and that's just ducky with them. Also their side mirrors that fall off due to crappy tape...and rear springs that fail and break...and door harnesses that fail especially on the US only Atlases...and their faulty pcv valves also called oil separators...yup gotta be a VW product...drag it into an abandoned field and shoot it. Go buy Toyota or Honda.

Posted by: L e a zar at August 07, 2022 02:57 PM (XBlNH)

116 Old truck break line did go, luckily was going grocery store and turning in slow when it went.

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 02:57 PM (k8B25)

117 45 I love my car except for the fact that I can't replace the driver side headlight without removing the damn battery, which means you have no means to check the alignment of the light until you put the damn battery back in, and if the alignment isn't so good, out comes the battery again...
It makes me have unkind thoughts.

Posted by: gourmand du jour, introspectively at August 07, 2022 02:16 PM (jTmQV)
----
Take the battery out put it somewhere close and use jumper cables.

Posted by: Ciampino - you do have jumper cables right? at August 07, 2022 02:57 PM (qfLjt)

118 And says to you, "Can you introduce me to J.J. Sefton?"
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 02:11 PM (1Nxff)

Snort!

Posted by: Diogenes at August 07, 2022 02:58 PM (anj39)

119 I had a 1995 Geo Tracker that had the check engine light come on every 25,000 miles. No matter what I did it stayed on until I took it to the dealer. I tried disconnecting the battery and that did not fix it. Apparently it was programmed to do that and it would only go off after the dealer plugged their diagnostic tool into the jeep.

The service guy finally admitted that it was forcing me to go to the dealer every 25,000 miles for "service".

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at August 07, 2022 03:00 PM (bVYXr)

120 my pickup wouldn't start. Went from running perfectly fine last time driven to was not getting fuel and would not start. Thank heavens our wonderful neighbor is a diesel mechanic and has a buddy that is into that particular model and this didn't happen away from home. It needed a new fuel injector computer module. Much better than needing to replace fuel injectors but ugh. I really want to keep my pre DEF vehicle so I hope this is a one off issue.

Posted by: PaleRider is simply irredeemable at August 07, 2022 03:00 PM (3cGpq)

121 Oh, yeah... what kinds of chemicals on what kind of schedule will we need?

Thanks, keeds.
Posted by: mindful webworker - ferts whirled plobrems at August 07, 2022 02:49 PM (+htsy)
------------------------------
2 Ft deep? Unless you and the Mrs are midgets, you should be able to step easily into the pool. A ladder might present a greater fall risk.

As far as chemicals, first get yourself a test kit (I picked one up at Menard's). Just stick the test strip in the water for a second, then pull it out, wait 15 seconds, and compare to the chart included with the test.

Do this right after you fill the pool, to get a baseline. Odds are everything will be low, so you'll probably want to start with pool shock to get levels up. Then you're mostly going to be using chlorine tablets and soda ash. Soda ash will bring up the ph.

Once you get things at the right levels, check it periodically, maybe once a week, or after a storm or heavy use.

Posted by: No One of Consequence at August 07, 2022 03:02 PM (RFKzk)

122 I don't understand why they don't put a code reader in the new LCD odometers.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 07, 2022 03:03 PM (yQpMk)

123 Had a check engine light come on and the car went into "Limp Home" mode. Very limited power, no acceleration. The problem was a stuck valve in the intake manifold. Cost to replace the valve, about $3,000. Cost to bypass the sensor and fool the computer, $1.98 resistor.

Posted by: Javems at August 07, 2022 03:03 PM (8ufRF)

124 It your passat steering module thingy is what's wrong. I have one that I could send you. If that is truely what is wrong. I had a wagon with fance steering wheel volume buttons and the volume buttons wwhere bad. I bought the wrong part, so I have one.

Posted by: sTevo at August 07, 2022 03:03 PM (sh7Ef)

125 But then, I always thought a radar detector in your car stereo would be a good seller.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 07, 2022 03:03 PM (yQpMk)

126 Eventually reached a settlement with Subaru over the whole thing, got my trans fixed and later that year my (dealer maintained and paid-off) Outback was totaled by an F-250.
Posted by: BonHagar

Were YOU driving the F250? ;-D

Posted by: Joe Mama at August 07, 2022 03:04 PM (WmGrA)

127 Radio in my Jeep Wrangler just started having the volume cut out every five seconds with a “pop” sound. Power stays on. Does it on am, fm, sat radio, disc.
FWPs are always expensive.

Posted by: RI Red at August 07, 2022 03:04 PM (xtg8y)

128
I don't understand why they don't put a code reader in the new LCD odometers.
Posted by: G'rump

Some older Fords do display certain monitoring stats on their digital odometers. My old Navigator does.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:05 PM (bSn9B)

129 YOU TUBE ! Imput year,make,model and specific problem in search. 10 vids will pop up. View each ond as some are much better than others.. Peace be with you my son!

Posted by: Commentor What Got a Shirt at August 07, 2022 03:07 PM (5s/s5)

130 2000 Dodge Intrepid. Suddenly loud bang and car slows to a crawl. Doesn't care what gear I select, it's always 2nd (3-speed auto). I drove 80+ miles at 45mph, which is max for that gear. Turns out the output speed sensor in the transmission had gone bad - $10 part. Apparently Dodge defaults to 2nd when there's a problem. I was told Ford just stops. So because the computer isn't getting data it inconveniences me the boss, or so I thought.
Still have the car.

Posted by: Ciampino - the computer is the important entity at August 07, 2022 03:07 PM (qfLjt)

131 Every time I start my truck I get a check tire warning. A pain in the ass considering I walk around my vehicle every time I get into it. I'm not wasting my time with valve stem sensors.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at August 07, 2022 03:07 PM (WHt4f)

132 Scratch that offer. I gave that part to the guy I gave the car to. it was a 2007.

Posted by: sTevo at August 07, 2022 03:07 PM (sh7Ef)

133
In the olden days, with the advent of "codes," GM cars would display Codes via the Check Engine Light (CEL).

You would "cycle" the key on/off a certain number of times and this would prompt the CEL to blink whatever codes it had in store.

It would blink two times, then three times, for example, for a code "23."

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:08 PM (bSn9B)

134 On second thoughts I think it was 1st gear that it defaulted to when that happened.

Posted by: Ciampino - the @#(&* computer is the important entity at August 07, 2022 03:09 PM (qfLjt)

135 Um so you bought (got sucked in) one of those El Cheapo gizmos on TV. They blow chunks.. Just sayin..

Posted by: Commentor What Got a Shirt at August 07, 2022 03:09 PM (5s/s5)

136 Eff JD and the horse the rode in on. If you bought a John Deere without doing any research, you deserve those problems. Next time, don't buy a JD.

Posted by: Lump the Chump at August 07, 2022 03:10 PM (IuV0I)

137 Hold onto your used vehicles. Because these days youre driving a computer attached to a vehicle. With all the reliability that comes with things run by software.

Posted by: brak at August 07, 2022 03:11 PM (lO5WT)

138 133
In the olden days, with the advent of "codes," GM cars would display Codes via the Check Engine Light (CEL).

You would "cycle" the key on/off a certain number of times and this would prompt the CEL to blink whatever codes it had in store.

It would blink two times, then three times, for example, for a code "23."
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:08 PM (bSn9B)

----------------------------

I remember those days. No two car models did it the same. It was like a voodoo ritual to get those codes.

Posted by: No One of Consequence at August 07, 2022 03:12 PM (RFKzk)

139 Eff JD and the horse the rode in on. If you bought a John Deere without doing any research, you deserve those problems. Next time, don't buy a JD.
Posted by: Lump the Chump

Some friends that live in the boonies on the mountain have an old Alice Chalmers. He loves that thing.

Posted by: Infidel at August 07, 2022 03:12 PM (mn1Pi)

140 It's called "limp home" mode.

Posted by: Notsothoreau at August 07, 2022 03:13 PM (9WSy4)

141 Allis.

Posted by: Infidel at August 07, 2022 03:13 PM (mn1Pi)

142
Some friends that live in the boonies on the mountain have an old Alice Chalmers. He loves that thing.
Posted by: Infidel

lulz

Allis

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:13 PM (bSn9B)

143 I'm a fervent supporter of vehicle inspections--the SAFETY part. Emissions I don't give a damn about.

Been a vehicle inspector for nearly all my career and can't tell you all the various systems I've run across with failed or worn out parts. like brake hoses, suspension items (ball joints, tie rods etc) that pose a hazard to other people than just the driver.

More than a few cars didn't belong on the road in their condition, damn if I want to be driving in their vicinity, my family is too important.

Posted by: irongrampa at August 07, 2022 03:14 PM (KATBx)

144 FWPs are always expensive.
Posted by: RI Red at August 07, 2022 03:04 PM (xtg8y)

No kidding.
One of my water lines to the back yard faucet (and farthest from the water access point so the line runs the length of the house) buzzes like a pissed off hornet when I finish watering the grass. It buzzes for 5-10 seconds then stops. Then again a few minutes later. Only happens when I've been watering and goes on for hours after I'm done. Not when it's cloudy or in the winter.
Annoying as hell. No idea how to stop it but I bet it's expensive.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 07, 2022 03:14 PM (anj39)

145 Soothie, I'm a fck up. What can I say.

Posted by: Infidel at August 07, 2022 03:14 PM (mn1Pi)

146
It would blink two times, then three times, for example, for a code "23."
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:08 PM (

*sings* Blink three times on the dashboard if you looove me......

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at August 07, 2022 03:14 PM (Qhnrt)

147
Decades ago Fiat and Allis made some heavy equipment together.

Fiat-Allis.

So, naturally, people call them Fat Alice's.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:14 PM (bSn9B)

148 Tis reminded me have a low la in tire and been two weeks since checked it. I have a air compressor so it's no big thing to check.

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 03:15 PM (k8B25)

149
Damn. I just realized something.

I am now an "old timer."

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:15 PM (bSn9B)

150 Radio in my Jeep Wrangler just started having the volume cut out every five seconds with a “pop” sound. Power stays on. Does it on am, fm, sat radio, disc.
FWPs are always expensive

---

Sounds like the amp or the actual volume control. Does it have a knob for volume? Does it have a separate amp?

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at August 07, 2022 03:15 PM (h1jJh)

151 Alice in Chalmers had some good songs. I didn't know they made tractors too.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at August 07, 2022 03:16 PM (u73oe)

152 Sous Vide is the cooking equivalent of a gorgeous 40-something, dressing appropriately and beautifully, walking in elegant heels (not too tall and not too short) smiling at you as she sashays by...!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 07, 2022 02:06 PM (XIJ/X)

I just saw that there's a YouTube channel named SousVideEverything. Not sure where CBD finds the time...

Posted by: clutch cargo - processed in a facility that may contain lead at August 07, 2022 03:16 PM (zB/T/)

153 Drive them like you stole them.

Posted by: torabora at August 07, 2022 03:17 PM (6v4w6)

154
Yep, good call on the Amp.
That was my guess, too.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:17 PM (bSn9B)

155 Decades ago Fiat and Allis made some heavy equipment together.

Fiat-Allis.

So, naturally, people call them Fat Alice's.
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:14 PM (bSn9B)
***

Avoid the rental tractor rides...Uber-Allis.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 07, 2022 03:19 PM (anj39)

156 I never ever get a CEL on any of my vehicles.

Did have an Oldsmobile once than when it got cold out (below 32 degrees) the horn rely would connect and blow my horn. Killed my battery once in an airport parking lot. Damn horn must have been blowing for days.

Now when the CYAL comes on, look out.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at August 07, 2022 03:19 PM (R/m4+)

157 I think US companies like to partner up with Italian companies because the weather in Italy is very nice weather.

Posted by: torabora at August 07, 2022 03:19 PM (6v4w6)

158 Maybe the "check engine light" means you're do for a new vehicle. Like when the ashtrays are full, or you've run out of gas.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 07, 2022 03:19 PM (BFigT)

159 No kidding.
One of my water lines to the back yard faucet (and farthest from the water access point so the line runs the length of the house) buzzes like a pissed off hornet when I finish watering the grass. It buzzes for 5-10 seconds then stops. Then again a few minutes later. Only happens when I've been watering and goes on for hours after I'm done. Not when it's cloudy or in the winter.
Annoying as hell. No idea how to stop it but I bet it's expensive.
Posted by: Diogenes at August 07, 2022 03:14 PM (anj39)

**

I have a similar problem. Whenever I start a load in the washer, I hear a hammer sound coming from the area where the water line comes into the house by the water heater. I sure hope it's not serious because fixing that would mean pulling the toilet to get the panel out to get to the water heater.

Posted by: That Guy What Always Says Yeah Buddy TM at August 07, 2022 03:19 PM (R5lpX)

160 It's difficult to ignore an actual break system failure.

Posted by: Braenyard at August 07, 2022 03:20 PM (85PWb)

161 Some years ago I leased a new Cad CTS and then we went on a trip to the Wilds of Alabama. On the way the car started making siren sounds...think of a WW2 Destroyer about to drop depth charges. It was intermittent and only occured at highway speeds and after 20 miles. The computer knew something was wrong but wouldnt disclose what it was..brilliant engineering. After a week of tearing of hair and rending of garments, the mechanics figured out it was the yaw sensor which is under the drivers seat. This detects that the motor vehicle is going sideways and the solution is a warning signal. Reason #8346 to drink.

Posted by: SS at August 07, 2022 03:21 PM (xlrNs)

162 Are you ready for Road Warrior times fighting off monkeypox zombies? Coming in Fall of 2022

Posted by: Commentor What Got a Shirt at August 07, 2022 03:21 PM (5s/s5)

163 >>>Radio in my Jeep Wrangler just started having the volume cut out every five seconds with a “pop” sound. Power stays on. Does it on am, fm, sat radio, disc.
FWPs are always expensive

>My radio cuts in and out based on the temperature. I don't care, because I have a smartphone and portable bluetooth speakers. I could get these things fixed, but the truck 15 years old and I'm a cheap bastard.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at August 07, 2022 03:21 PM (WHt4f)

164 More than a few cars didn't belong on the road in their condition, damn if I want to be driving in their vicinity, my family is too important.
Posted by: irongrampa at August 07, 2022 03:14 PM (KATBx)

One sure why to fix that, make sure inflation remains high so no one can afford to buy a better car/truck.

Posted by: lowandslow at August 07, 2022 03:21 PM (qH6FZ)

165 It's difficult to ignore an actual break system failure.

Posted by: Braenyard at August 07, 2022 03:20 PM (85PWb)

Lamp posts. Not just for politicians.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 07, 2022 03:22 PM (anj39)

166 When watching car repair videos on YouTube, if the guy is wearing flip flops, move on to the next video.

The best videos are done with guys (and gals) that have their name on their shirt.

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at August 07, 2022 03:23 PM (h1jJh)

167 We have emissions testing in this crooked fvcking county and I have one coming up giving me anxieties from old cars passed. They'd put the back tires on rollers and ran up the rpms so high I thought they'd throw a rod. $500 minimum from a mechanic if it didn't pass.

Posted by: dartist at August 07, 2022 03:23 PM (+ya+t)

168 Yep it's an engine. Now what?

Posted by: Ray at August 07, 2022 03:24 PM (sw3xv)

169 Happy Sunday Horde! Off to mid-afternoon TLM. For no good reason I missed today's book thread (tolle lege) but I have 2 good books for next week.

Anyone have a good movie/series to recommend? I've run out (I do NOT recommend "uncoupled" which should be called Gay Sex in the City).

Posted by: LASue at August 07, 2022 03:24 PM (Ed8Zd)

170 The Junta members have set themselves up to be Alinskyed about the price of gas.

The Junta Clowns keep patting themselves on the back for gas prices going down continually since the peak in June. They proudly say gas price reductions help workers save money and have a little breathing room in this 'transition period" (one of their euphemisms for high inflation).

They should be asked, if gas price reductions are so good for the middle and lower classes, why isn't Brandon working to reduce gas prices as much as possible? Why not get them even lower than under the evil Trump? Why isn't Brandon drilling, drilling, drilling, to reduce gasoline and natural gas prices to rock bottom, helping his beloved middle class save more and more money on energy costs? Their talk about keeping fossil fuel energy costs artificially high to make renewables look good would bounce back at them, hard.

But no, the Media is too corrupt to do this.

Posted by: Gref at August 07, 2022 03:25 PM (AMIL/)

171
You hear hammering when you use the washer? Like every time the valve opens and closes to fill the machine with water, usually cold water?

They make "hammer arrestors" you can screw right on the washing machine. They work great. Hammering is not good for your pipes!

*these type of hammer arrestors don't last forever; the spring inside them goes weak after a while, maybe a year or so

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:25 PM (bSn9B)

172 169 Happy Sunday Horde! Off to mid-afternoon TLM. For no good reason I missed today's book thread (tolle lege) but I have 2 good books for next week.

Anyone have a good movie/series to recommend? I've run out (I do NOT recommend "uncoupled" which should be called Gay Sex in the City).
Posted by: LASue at August 07, 2022 03:24 PM (Ed8Zd)

-----------------------------

My wife really liked The Sandman (I didn't watch it much, but the parts I caught seemed good). Neither she nor I have read the source material, so I can't speak to how well it tracked.

Posted by: No One of Consequence at August 07, 2022 03:26 PM (RFKzk)

173 The John Deere issue is why I run Kubota tractors, the green paint ain't what it used to e.

Posted by: Indignacio Vindacatorem at August 07, 2022 03:27 PM (oWBc3)

174 Anyone have a good movie/series to recommend? I've run out (I do NOT recommend "uncoupled" which should be called Gay Sex in the City).
Posted by: LASue at August 07, 2022 03:24 PM (Ed8Zd)

Foyle's War.
Excellent police mystery series set in England at the start of the war. Well acted and beautiful period piece.
Easily the best series I've watched.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 07, 2022 03:27 PM (anj39)

175 . I sure hope it's not serious because fixing that would mean pulling the toilet to get the panel out to get to the water heater.
Posted by: That Guy What Always Says Yeah Buddy TM at August 07, 2022 03:19 PM (R5lpX

Geez. Did the Marquis de Sade build your home.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at August 07, 2022 03:28 PM (Qhnrt)

176 I remember the good old days when my buddies used to drive around with home stereo speakers in the back seat of their ghetto cruisers. Some things never change.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at August 07, 2022 03:28 PM (WHt4f)

177 This detects that the motor vehicle is going sideways and the solution is a warning signal. Reason #8346 to drink.

Posted by: SS at August 07

====

Back in rear wheel drive and V-8 days, we congratulated ourselves. No warning needed.

Posted by: 2009Refugee at August 07, 2022 03:29 PM (8AONa)

178 *these type of hammer arrestors don't last forever; the spring inside them goes weak after a while, maybe a year or so

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:25 PM (bSn9B)

**

Thanks!

Posted by: That Guy What Always Says Yeah Buddy TM at August 07, 2022 03:29 PM (R5lpX)

179 >>>And to make it even more helpful there is no way to turn off the "Check Engine" light

Maybe ... duct tape over it?

Posted by: m at August 07, 2022 03:30 PM (0ixKl)

180 I remember the good old days when my buddies used to drive around with home stereo speakers in the back seat of their ghetto cruisers. Some things never change.
Posted by: Dr. Bone at August 07, 2022 03:28 PM (WHt4f)

Ahhh.
Cruisin' with Bubba, Skooter, and their cousin Booger.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 07, 2022 03:30 PM (anj39)

181 I haven't had radio work in truck in year and half, it to started with loud pop, cut off, then worked fine. Did that couple months with increasing frequency then it died.
F-150. It's a common problem

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 03:31 PM (k8B25)

182 Been tempted to disconnect the wiring that links my Toyota to the company.

Just this week I climb in after stopping and eating sushi to find my car informing me that it has a recall notice for possible stalling.

This connectivity is for the birds.

P.S. My car was unaffected.

Posted by: Anna Puma at August 07, 2022 03:31 PM (YuymQ)

183
think US companies like to partner up with Italian companies because the weather in Italy is very nice weather.
Posted by: torabora at August 07, 2022 03:19 PM (6v4w6)

_________

"Yeah, nice." - Fifth Army GI, 1944.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at August 07, 2022 03:31 PM (1Nxff)

184 Maybe ... duct tape over it?
-----
My dad did that for an emissions test as a joke, lol. Got caught of course.

Posted by: dartist at August 07, 2022 03:32 PM (+ya+t)

185 I've got a OBD reader called BlueDriver. It was about $100 and it connects to an app on my phone.
It will read codes and allow you to clear codes.
I always clear the codes first, to see if they come back. Sometimes they don't come back. BlueDriver also reads the codes and links to the most common fixes for the code on your model vehicle. It's not perfect but more often than not it's a nice feature.

Posted by: Inogame at August 07, 2022 03:33 PM (ftVvF)

186 Geez. Did the Marquis de Sade build your home.
Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at August 07, 2022 03:28 PM (Qhnrt)

**

Unfortunately I was the dipshit who designed the cabin. There was a space behind the walk-in shower that I made into a closet. The water heater is in that closet under the bottom shelf...a 50 gallon behemoth.

Posted by: That Guy What Always Says Yeah Buddy TM at August 07, 2022 03:33 PM (R5lpX)

187 Sous Vide is the equivalent of start cooking on Monday what you want to eat on Friday.

Posted by: Ben Had at August 07, 2022 03:33 PM (zHRci)

188 A YouTube fix is get out the control board ( had dash half way apart then afraid couldn't get it back put it back.) Bake in oven for some minutes and put it back. Some kind of cold soldering trick.Now it wouldn't fly sticking it in the oven but have a heat gun so could try that if I get it out.

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 03:34 PM (k8B25)

189 Buy a $25 OBDC code reader with CEL reset and fugetaboutit.

Cleared all the codes when we traded it in. Sorry, not sorry.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at August 07, 2022 02:06 PM (BFigT)

Buy a vehicle pre-OBDII, and you only have to worry about low oil or high temperature. Problem solved.

Posted by: Comrade Flounder, Wrecker, Hoarder, Saboteur at August 07, 2022 03:35 PM (U3uv2)

190 184 Maybe ... duct tape over it?
-----
My dad did that for an emissions test as a joke, lol. Got caught of course.

Posted by: dartist at August 07, 2022 03:32 PM (+ya+t)

The computer you paid for as part of the vehicle is programmed to rat you out to The Authorities. A First World Problem, to the max.

Posted by: Gref at August 07, 2022 03:35 PM (AMIL/)

191
Anyone have a good movie/series to recommend?
Posted by: LASue

Jack Irish or Wire In The Blood, if you like mystery/detective shows.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:35 PM (bSn9B)

192 Been tempted to disconnect the wiring that links my Toyota to the company.

Just this week I climb in after stopping and eating sushi to find my car informing me that it has a recall notice for possible stalling.

This connectivity is for the birds.

P.S. My car was unaffected.
Posted by: Anna Puma at August 07, 2022 03:31 PM (YuymQ)
***
Good thing you didn't stop for tacos. The horn would sound like a Mariachi band and the car would hop up and down.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 07, 2022 03:35 PM (anj39)

193 My BMW light just says Checkbook!.
Pretty rude of it.

Posted by: Jimco Industries at August 07, 2022 03:35 PM (buTO7)

194 179 >>>And to make it even more helpful there is no way to turn off the "Check Engine" light

Maybe ... duct tape over it?
Posted by: m at August 07, 2022 03:30 PM (0ixKl)

LOL I see this has been suggested previously.

Posted by: m at August 07, 2022 03:35 PM (0ixKl)

195 Yesterday I experienced divine intervention. My 2006 F150 break line failed as I was tuning into my driveway. The line after the ABS to the rear wheel sprang a leak and the pedal would go to the floor.

I could pump them to get some stopping power but every push of the pedal was squirting fluid on the ground.

Looks like I'll be purchasing a double flare tool.

Posted by: sTevo at August 07, 2022 03:36 PM (sh7Ef)

196 I can hear the music coming from the hipster festival in Golden Gate Park on my deck.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at August 07, 2022 03:36 PM (EZebt)

197 193 My BMW light just says Checkbook!.
Pretty rude of it.
Posted by: Jimco Industries at August 07, 2022 03:35 PM (buTO7)

------------------------------

Sooner or later, it'll just deduct the amount from your bank account (and if you don't have enough, it'll just go into lockdown).

Posted by: No One of Consequence at August 07, 2022 03:37 PM (RFKzk)

198 Sous Vide is the cooking equivalent of a gorgeous 40-something, dressing appropriately and beautifully, walking in elegant heels (not too tall and not too short) smiling at you as she sashays by...!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 07, 2022 02:06 PM (XIJ/X)

Agreed. You gotta cook 'em low and slow.

Posted by: Jeffrey Dahmer at August 07, 2022 03:38 PM (U3uv2)

199 193 My BMW light just says Checkbook!.
Pretty rude of it.
Posted by: Jimco Industries at August 07, 2022 03:35 PM (buTO7)

For Fiats, I've heard "Fix It Again, Tony."

Posted by: m at August 07, 2022 03:39 PM (0ixKl)

200
My old grandmother used to say anything mechanical, give it a good bash. -- Colin Maud

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 07, 2022 03:39 PM (4akfh)

201 200!

Posted by: m at August 07, 2022 03:39 PM (0ixKl)

202 Way back in the day, not only did I drive until the air was dirty in my tires, I'd ride the brakes until I could hear metal to metal. That was back when choices were fixing tires/brakes or pay rent and have roof over head.

Posted by: That Guy What Always Says Yeah Buddy TM at August 07, 2022 03:40 PM (R5lpX)

203 sTevo my old truck was a 1997 that break lines went, had to get them replaced, wasn't too bad what I remember

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 03:40 PM (k8B25)

204 >>>Sous Vide is the equivalent of start cooking on Monday what you want to eat on Friday.

>Sous vide is a beautiful thing for lazy cooks who want to minimize cleanup. It's not for everything or everyone, but it's worth the expense.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at August 07, 2022 03:40 PM (WHt4f)

205 I can hear the music coming from the hipster festival in Golden Gate Park on my deck.
Posted by: San Franpsycho at August 07, 2022 03:36 PM (EZebt)
***
I got the Washington Midsummer Renaissance Faire in the big field at the end of my street. Gawd. Drunken dress up for adults.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 07, 2022 03:41 PM (anj39)

206 I have another pork loin on the smoker today. I can't hang around out there without drooling.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 07, 2022 03:41 PM (yQpMk)

207 Aren't all autos required to be OBD2 compliant?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 07, 2022 03:42 PM (LDM9d)

208 Just this week I climb in after stopping and eating sushi to find my car informing me that it has a recall notice for possible stalling.

Sounds fishy.

Posted by: N.L. Urker, there are chickens in my trench at August 07, 2022 03:42 PM (eGTCV)

209 Plus it is miserably hot and humid today.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 07, 2022 03:42 PM (yQpMk)

210 Looks like I'll be purchasing a double flare tool.
Posted by: sTevo at August 07, 2022 03:36 PM (sh7Ef)

The sell brake lines by the foot, don't really need to make your own anymore. And if you really want to make your own, they don't really need a double flare.

Posted by: lowandslow at August 07, 2022 03:42 PM (qH6FZ)

211 Yesterday I experienced divine intervention. My 2006 F150 break line failed as I was tuning into my driveway. The line after the ABS to the rear wheel sprang a leak and the pedal would go to the floor.

I could pump them to get some stopping power but every push of the pedal was squirting fluid on the ground.

Looks like I'll be purchasing a double flare tool.

Posted by: sTevo at August 07, 2022 03:36 PM (sh7Ef)

I had that happen with a master cylinder pinhole leak (in the casting) after a 500 trip towing a 16' trailer about a mile away from the house. I coasted in gingerly using compression/gearing to limp home.

Another time I just rolled into elk camp after some windy snowy mountain pass driving, with shear cliffs, parked it, and began saying hellos, and BAM! Torsion bar snapped due to a little nick in the coating allowing a corrosion crack to propagate across the torsion bar until it timely let go.

Posted by: Comrade Flounder, Wrecker, Hoarder, Saboteur at August 07, 2022 03:43 PM (U3uv2)

212 I had wifey step on the pedal and I could see the fluid squirting on the power steering sheave. So now the engine has a light coating of brake fluid on the drive side.

Posted by: sTevo at August 07, 2022 03:43 PM (sh7Ef)

213 203 cont
Filling brake fluid up and emergency brake might get you to where you need to get it fixed or parts.

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 03:43 PM (k8B25)

214 According to 'An Introduction to Modern Astrophysics" 2nd Ed, the mass of the sun is 2E30 kg. It loses mass as solar wind at a rate of 3E-14 solar masses per year. So I figure the sun gets lighter by 60 trillion metric tons per year just by the plasma crap it throws at us, and that's not even counting the annual mass lost by nuclear fusion ME conversion.

We're using up the sun too fast. If that isn't a first world problem, what is?

Posted by: In Case Of gp, Break Glass at August 07, 2022 03:44 PM (qpX6U)

215 They should be asked, if gas price reductions are so good for the middle and lower classes, why isn't Brandon working to reduce gas prices as much as possible? Why not get them even lower than under the evil Trump? Why isn't Brandon drilling, drilling, drilling, to reduce gasoline and natural gas prices to rock bottom, helping his beloved middle class save more and more money on energy costs? Their talk about keeping fossil fuel energy costs artificially high to make renewables look good would bounce back at them, hard.

But no, the Media is too corrupt to do this.

Posted by: Gref at August 07, 2022 03:25 PM

paul doocy from fox is asking the administration spokeshole lady every day about that very thing. She never has an answer.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at August 07, 2022 03:44 PM (bVYXr)

216 Early food... cooking a meatloaf tonight.

Posted by: That Guy What Always Says Yeah Buddy TM at August 07, 2022 03:46 PM (R5lpX)

217
Looks like I'll be purchasing a double flare tool.
Posted by: sTevo

Nickel-Copper brake line is what all the cool kids use, now. Corrosion-resistant and easy to bend.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:47 PM (bSn9B)

218 Factory trained Journeyman Mech here.
Proprietary software has been in use for years. I actually have to call Deere mechanics sometimes on machines I am factory certified on. These things aren't anywhere near your grandads IH tractor. They are more complex than you think. Just giving everyone that software would lead to some very expensive problems. As well as misdiagnosis galore. 10 years ago I could work off schematics with a multimeter and nail an issue within an hour or so. Those days are gone. It's all data now. You NEED to plug in. You can't read data without doing so. For this you can blame Baby Bush. He had a war to fund and signed for all this.
Modern machines are more like a small internet. You need people like Pixy, not the local yahoo fired from every shop in town who has opened his own.

Posted by: Reforger at August 07, 2022 03:47 PM (BBmhM)

219 My locale does not have inspections.
No safety, no emisisons, no nothing.
I know this is unhelpful, other than saying get a code reader, but here, I've driven cars for years with all the dash lights lit up like a trailer park on Christmas.

Posted by: LenNeal at August 07, 2022 03:48 PM (U11/V)

220 That reminds me. Gotta thaw out my pork loin this week.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at August 07, 2022 03:49 PM (89T5c)

221 Sous Vide is the cooking equivalent of a gorgeous 40-something, dressing appropriately and beautifully, walking in elegant heels (not too tall and not too short) smiling at you as she sashays by...!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at August 07, 2022 02:06 PM (XIJ/X)

Or...it could be a shambolic zombie walking slowly and inevitably towards a meal while calling out for someone, anyone who might have "brains"

Posted by: Boswell at August 07, 2022 03:49 PM (+Cgut)

222
paul doocy from fox is asking the administration spokeshole lady every day about that very thing. She never has an answer.
Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at August 07, 2022 03:44 PM (bVYXr)

We're not in a recession, we're in a period of transition. We should celebrate.

Posted by: Pork Chops & Bacons at August 07, 2022 03:49 PM (Qhnrt)

223 They can reset it for you but whatever it is the check engine light cannot come back on for 150 miles. If it stays off you're golden, if not still screwed.
Posted by: JROD at August 07, 2022 02:12 PM (0jZnq)

This is why one must have an el-cheapo code reader so you can shut off the CEL. Both my current Suburbans show a CEL all the time. The '08 sees a flaw in the Evap. Emissions system. Probably because the rig got rear-ended and the charcoal canister crushed. I mostly fixed it, but my repair isn't quite airtight. No effect on driveability. And the '99 Suburban has a flaky direct drive clutch in the torque converter. Once in a while, it will throw a hard shift. Mostly it runs just fine. I'll wait until I perceive a problem.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 07, 2022 03:49 PM (LDM9d)

224 218 Factory trained Journeyman Mech here.
Proprietary software has been in use for years. I actually have to call Deere mechanics sometimes on machines I am factory certified on. These things aren't anywhere near your grandads IH tractor. They are more complex than you think. Just giving everyone that software would lead to some very expensive problems. As well as misdiagnosis galore. 10 years ago I could work off schematics with a multimeter and nail an issue within an hour or so. Those days are gone. It's all data now. You NEED to plug in. You can't read data without doing so. For this you can blame Baby Bush. He had a war to fund and signed for all this.
Modern machines are more like a small internet. You need people like Pixy, not the local yahoo fired from every shop in town who has opened his own.
Posted by: Reforger at August 07, 2022 03:47 PM (BBmhM)

Not sure how old you are. Did you do pre-software mechanic work, too?

Posted by: m at August 07, 2022 03:50 PM (0ixKl)

225 Homey Depot and 1/4" reinforced plastic tubing

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 03:50 PM (k8B25)

226 The sell brake lines by the foot, don't really need to make your own anymore. And if you really want to make your own, they don't really need a double flare.
- - -

The line has a union under the bed and if it doesn't disconnect, then I will definitely be flaring a line. When I take the busted line out, I will see if I can by a set length line.

The double is required on brake lines. I tried it on my 68 dodge dart several decade ago and a single flare wont hold, and the angles ate all wrong. I tried and realized I didn't want to kill anybody do to a brake line fault.

Posted by: sTevo at August 07, 2022 03:50 PM (sh7Ef)

227 Or...it could be a shambolic zombie walking slowly and inevitably towards a meal while calling out for someone, anyone who might have "brains"
Posted by: Boswell at August 07, 2022 03:49 PM (+Cgut)

Hmmm. I'm guessing okra is involved.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 07, 2022 03:50 PM (anj39)

228 "Modern machines are more like a small internet."

If you told me 30 years ago that cars would have dozens of CPUs in them, I'd swear that they could never work reliably. Yet, somehow, this stuff functions most of the time.

Posted by: In Case Of gp, Break Glass at August 07, 2022 03:52 PM (qpX6U)

229 Or...it could be a shambolic zombie walking slowly and inevitably towards a meal while calling out for someone, anyone who might have "brains"

Posted by: Boswell at August 07, 2022 03:49 PM

We saw a woman exactly like that at the casino today. She was drunk off her ass stumbling all over the place but the staff didn't say a word because she would randomly walk by a slot machine and stick a $100 in it.

Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at August 07, 2022 03:52 PM (bVYXr)

230
Ah yes, they are about to dust off the "New Economy" bullshit, again?

When obama was ruining the economy 2009-2012, they kept telling us to get ready for the "New Economy."

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:52 PM (bSn9B)

231 We saw a woman exactly like that at the casino today. She was drunk off her ass stumbling all over the place but the staff didn't say a word because she would randomly walk by a slot machine and stick a $100 in it.
Posted by: Mister Scott (formerly GWS) at August 07, 2022 03:52 PM (bVYXr)

My kind of woman - drunk and carrying $100's

Posted by: Boswell at August 07, 2022 03:53 PM (+Cgut)

232 If someone steals your catalytic converter while you're parked somewhere can you start your car? If you can, does the CEL come on?

Posted by: N.L. Urker, there are chickens in my trench at August 07, 2022 03:53 PM (eGTCV)

233 166 When watching car repair videos on YouTube, if the guy is wearing flip flops, move on to the next video.

The best videos are done with guys (and gals) that have their name on their shirt.
Posted by: Lemmiwinks at August 07, 2022 03:23 PM (h1jJh)
- - -

I'll be sure to post photos of my fixing it wearing flip flops!

Posted by: sTevo at August 07, 2022 03:53 PM (sh7Ef)

234 So, naturally, people call them Fat Alice's.
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:14 PM (bSn9B)

Old truckers joke: Peterbuilt, Kenworth and Freightliner decided to merge. Name was Peter Worth Shakin.
(Freightliners were called Freight Shakers by some)

Posted by: Javems at August 07, 2022 03:54 PM (8ufRF)

235 Apparently NBC is having a FWP with the sun setting before its too dark to finish. Free golf tomorrow??

Posted by: NC Ref at August 07, 2022 03:55 PM (Yh3xC)

236 When watching car repair videos on YouTube, if the guy is wearing flip flops, move on to the next video.

I'm in the garage working on a motorcycle in my underwear and safety glasses.

It would make a disturbing YT.

Posted by: G'rump928(c) at August 07, 2022 03:55 PM (yQpMk)

237 They should use that check engine light on turn signals and brake lights. They never burn out.

Posted by: x-ray jeff at August 07, 2022 03:55 PM (iQfO7)

238

Based on TV today, stylish gay black guys on buttfuck drugs constitute 50% of the population...

Posted by: Shemp Smith at August 07, 2022 03:56 PM (7DYli)

239 Modern machines are more like a small internet."

If you told me 30 years ago that cars would have dozens of CPUs in them, I'd swear that they could never work reliably. Yet, somehow, this stuff functions most of the time.
Posted by: In Case Of gp, Break Glass at August 07, 2022 03:52 PM (qpX6U)

You must have avoided flying if you were worried they would work.

Posted by: Kilroy wasn't here at August 07, 2022 03:56 PM (BfhXc)

240
If someone steals your catalytic converter while you're parked somewhere can you start your car? If you can, does the CEL come on?
Posted by: N.L. Urker

Sure your car will start. And it will be really loud because your exhaust system has been disconnected.

And, yes, there will be Codes! The computer will know the Cat is unaccounted for.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:56 PM (bSn9B)

241
I'm in the garage working on a motorcycle in my underwear and safety glasses.

Why is a motorcycle wearing underwear and safety glasses?

Posted by: N.L. Urker, there are chickens in my trench at August 07, 2022 03:56 PM (eGTCV)

242 >>>Or...it could be a shambolic zombie walking slowly and inevitably towards a meal while calling out for someone, anyone who might have "brains"
Posted by: Boswell at August 07, 2022 03:49 PM (+Cgut)

>I've worked on hundreds of hydraulic power units and done hundreds of upgrades installing tank heaters. It never occurred to me to that I use a tank and tank heater to cook my food or I might have built one in the shop on the down low.

Posted by: Dr. Bone at August 07, 2022 03:58 PM (WHt4f)

243

I'm in the garage working on a motorcycle in my underwear and safety glasses.

It would make a disturbing YT.
Posted by: G'rump

Please tell me you're using an Oxy/Acetylene torch.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:58 PM (bSn9B)

244 Based on TV today, stylish gay black guys on buttfuck drugs constitute 50% of the population...
Posted by: Shemp Smith at August 07, 2022 03:56 PM (7DYl

And those that take and stay on this medication can have infection so low it can't be detected and cannot be spread through sex. ( this part makes me Hulk angry)

Posted by: Kilroy wasn't here at August 07, 2022 03:58 PM (BfhXc)

245 Posted by: Reforger at August 07, 2022 03:47 PM (BBmhM)

Is your nic a metal work reference or a trip to Germany.

Posted by: Javems at August 07, 2022 03:59 PM (8ufRF)

246 If someone steals your converter, you will know the second you hit the ignition.

Posted by: gourmand du jour, introspectively at August 07, 2022 03:59 PM (jTmQV)

247 The line has a union under the bed and if it doesn't disconnect, then I will definitely be flaring a line. When I take the busted line out, I will see if I can by a set length line.
The double is required on brake lines. I tried it on my 68 dodge dart several decade ago and a single flare wont hold, and the angles ate all wrong. I tried and realized I didn't want to kill anybody do to a brake line fault.
Posted by: sTevo at August 07, 2022 03:50 PM (sh7Ef)

I've never had a problem with a single flare but I'm not going to tell how to do it. I will give you some advice, don't be locked into using the factory set up. You can do/buy lots of different options, cut out the pin hole and use a compression fitting union or just a regular flare union, etc., etc.

Posted by: lowandslow at August 07, 2022 03:59 PM (qH6FZ)

248 Tape. Use tape to cover the light. I also use tape to fix my John Deere tractor!!

Posted by: Weasel at August 07, 2022 03:59 PM (0IeYL)

249 My car warns me if its less than 37 degrees out, but warns it like its an emergency, including putting the warning up on the windshield heads-up display in red. It wants to be safe AF.

Posted by: Jimco Industries at August 07, 2022 04:01 PM (buTO7)

250 OH DINNER IS CALLING

FOOD NOOD

Posted by: Skip at August 07, 2022 04:01 PM (k8B25)

251 Could be a cool business model. to make a hardened engine computer that only cares about fuel injection and spark timing. All other functions are optional.

Then when SMOD, or any other EMP threat from our neighboring terrorist tribal units hits, at least the car/truck will run!

Posted by: sTevo at August 07, 2022 04:01 PM (sh7Ef)

252 When I was dating my wife, she had a crappy little Nissan Sentra. In the summer it had a bad tendency to vapor lock. One day she calls me in a panic that the car stalled out in the boonies and she was stranded. I took off to rescue her. After a bit she called to say that a tow truck driver came along and took the car to his shop. When I get there, the car is on the lift and they are telling her that she needs a new computer and about $2000 for parts and labor. I told them the problem is a vapor lock. Since it's been sitting inside the garage out of the hot sun, it will start right up. Which it surely did.

I paid them for the tow, and we took the car to my mechanic who was an awesome guy and had been working on my cars for years. After I told him what happened and that they said the car needed a new computer he smile and said "that car doesn't have a computer."

Posted by: Eric at August 07, 2022 04:02 PM (a2F+C)

253 Not sure how old you are. Did you do pre-software mechanic work, too?
Posted by: m at August 07, 2022 03:50 PM (0ixKl)

53. Been in the industry since the 90's.

Hey though. The old "did you try turning it off and on again?" does apply now to cars and equiptment. Disconnect the battery, wait 15 or 20 minutes, reconnect and see what you get.

Posted by: Reforger at August 07, 2022 04:03 PM (BBmhM)

254 Please tell me you're using an Oxy/Acetylene torch.
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:58 PM (bSn9B)
===
Laughing so funny

Posted by: San Franpsycho at August 07, 2022 04:03 PM (EZebt)

255 Foxwell make a good reader.

And you can purchase the software for specific brands for deeper troubleshooting.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at August 07, 2022 04:03 PM (svdGq)

256
Just wait until you boomers lose your keys to your new fancy chinese-made junk car and you have get towed to the Dealership and spend $500 for a new key.

Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 04:08 PM (bSn9B)

257
Is your nic a metal work reference or a trip to Germany.
Posted by: Javems at August 07, 2022 03:59 PM (8ufRF)

Both.

Posted by: Reforger at August 07, 2022 04:09 PM (BBmhM)

258 255 Foxwell make a good reader.

And you can purchase the software for specific brands for deeper troubleshooting.
Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at August 07, 2022 04:03 PM (svdGq)
---
Thats the brand I had to get in order to replace the car battery. $250 for the battery, $200 for the scanner tool capable enough to tell the car it has a new battery. Unless you tell the car that its a new battery, it will treat it like the old battery and (somehow) screw it up.

Posted by: Jimco Industries at August 07, 2022 04:09 PM (buTO7)

259 In the olden days, with the advent of "codes," GM cars would display Codes via the Check Engine Light (CEL).

You would "cycle" the key on/off a certain number of times and this would prompt the CEL to blink whatever codes it had in store.

It would blink two times, then three times, for example, for a code "23."
Posted by: Soothsayer's Untrue But Accurate Tales at August 07, 2022 03:08 PM (bSn9B)

I would like to see an adoption of "OBD3". Make it backward-compatible with OBD2 scanners and code readers, but have it also display the trouble codes on the vehicle's "information center" screen, in plain English, and make the list of trouble codes exportable as a text file to almost any device via Bluetooth and a USB port.

I would plump for that to be included in any right-to-repair legislation.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 07, 2022 04:17 PM (pE21i)

260 If someone steals your catalytic converter while you're parked somewhere can you start your car? If you can, does the CEL come on?
Posted by: N.L. Urker, there are chickens in my trench at August 07, 2022 03:53 PM (eGTCV)

Probably willowed, but yes, you can start your car, and the CEL will come on, too. And the racket of the unmuffled engine will alert you to the problem about 0.5 seconds after the engine starts.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 07, 2022 04:28 PM (ejPaj)

261 I would plump for that to be included in any right-to-repair legislation.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 07, 2022 04:17 PM (pE21i)

All that crap is in cars due to legislation.
Every vehicle has an OBD2 plug in it.
They never legislated how it had to be wired though.

"Right to Repair" sounds like money in the bank to me. Problem is I hate cleanup work. I can take anything apart and repair it but being handed a bucket of parts and nuts bolts is hours more I can charge as I have no standard hours to go by when it comes to that sort of thing.

Posted by: Reforger at August 07, 2022 04:32 PM (zzEsG)

262 I hope all of the Stinger missiles that we sent to Ukraine have mandatory software updates that can only be provided by an authorized U.S. source. I worry about who is going to get those things next.

Posted by: Fenderbender at August 07, 2022 04:59 PM (r72iY)

263 Both.

Posted by: Reforger at August 07, 2022 04:09 PM (BBmhM)

I made the trip in 72.

Posted by: Javems at August 07, 2022 05:22 PM (8ufRF)

264 I'd bet $100 there's a dance you can do with the gas pedal to reset the ECU.

Posted by: insurgens ad opus at August 07, 2022 05:55 PM (Rx5M+)

265 My low tire pressure light was on for 3 months with no low tires. I fixed the light wit a piece of lack electrical tape.

Posted by: Robert W Smith (TrappedinDC) at August 07, 2022 07:08 PM (rguyU)

266 My next daily driver will be pre-1988 pickup.

Posted by: Kreskin at August 07, 2022 07:27 PM (y8wop)

267 There may be a way for someone who is stuck in Californication to avoid the inspection racket, but it depends on the exact wording of CA's vehicle registration and tax regime. You incorporate a holding corp in Wyoming or somewhere which has no inspection AND no sales/use tax craziness. Holdco buys a car and gets tags in Wyoming etc. then leases the car to you. As a leased car is continues to carry the original tags, even though it is being driven in another state.
Worked to avoid paying 8% sales tax in Ontario, by buying in Alberta... Probably a portable scheme. But you do have to carry the cost of keeping the corp. up do date. Otherwise you might actually escheat the car to the state!

Posted by: Dyspeptic Curmudgeon at August 08, 2022 01:07 AM (Kc1Sm)

268 Disconnect the battery, leave it for 5 minutes, reconnect.

Problem solved.

Posted by: chop at August 08, 2022 03:13 AM (xWstP)

269 I am making $92/hour telecommuting. I never imagined that it was honest to goodness yet my closest companion is earning $21 thousand a month by working on the connection, that was truly astounding for me, she prescribed me to attempt it simply. That is what I do... http://www.salarycash1.com

Posted by: Sarah at August 08, 2022 04:47 AM (kg+av)

270 Most states won't perform your emissions test if you have a "check engine" warning light. No emissions test= registration suspension.

Posted by: Not Fen at August 08, 2022 07:09 AM (OCYPv)

271 Subscriptions for basic automotive functions are all the rage.

Posted by: aelfheld at August 08, 2022 10:35 AM (Zy9Yy)

272 I will immediately grasp your rss as I can not find your
e-mail subscription hyperlink or newsletter service.
Do you've any? Please let me recognize so that I could subscribe.
Thanks.

Posted by: pragmatic play at August 14, 2022 02:17 PM (suHgX)

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