aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com
CBD:
cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com
Buck:
buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com
joe mannix:
mannix2024 at proton.me
MisHum:
petmorons at gee mail.com
J.J. Sefton:
sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com
20th Anniversary Repost: "You're Fired": Donald Trump Grills the Dems on Why They Lost Their "Task"
The blog will be 20 years old on Thursday. Until the end of the week I'll be posting some best-of stuff, stuff you've probably read before and maybe even a couple of times.
But what am I gonna do. This post was written in the first year of the blog. I started the blog December 28, 2003, and wrote this the day after the 2004 elections. I've finally made some corrections to this that have bothered me for years: I corrected the name of Trump's wife and the name of his Florida estate. I didn't know those at the time I wrote this, and just guessed. Everyone knows them now, so I left in my original misspellings, people might think I was trying to make a joke. I wasn't. It's just that I only heard of "Mar-a-Lago" and "Melania" from The Apprentice and never saw either in print before at that time. I used to watch The Apprentice a lot. This one was super-fun to write. I was up till like 4am. Jokes just kept popping into my head. I was actually laughing. And I can't believe I've known many of you for 20 years now.SCENE: A corporate boardroom. Four nervous-looking candidates take their seats at a big table. DONALD TRUMP enters, flanked by his two corporate lieutenants. He sits across from the candidates. TRUMP: All right. I gave you all a task to perform. It was a difficult task, but you lost. You had to organize a political campaign, bring your message to the public, energize your base, win over independent voters, and then prevail in the most hotly-contested presidential campaign in fifty years. You lost. What went wrong?
JOHN KERRY: Well, as a Vietnam veteran, who served in Vietnam fighting with the Vietnamese against the North Vietnamese-- TRUMP: Hold on, before we get started, I should introduce my assistants. Carolyn you all know. (Carolyn nods icily.) TRUMP: Now George is away on business again, so this week he was replaced by... who did we get this week, Carolyn? CAROLYN: Blackie Lawless, lead singer of W.A.S.P. BLACKIE LAWLESS: 'ello, 'ello!!! TRUMP: I gotta be honest, I have no idea who the hell you are. BLACKIE: I was on the original Disciples of Darkness tour with Ronnie James Dio and Glen Danzig. TRUMP: That really helps me not at all. Anyway, John. You lost. You were the project manager. Do you deserve to be fired? KERRY: Absolutely not. As a Vietnam veteran, I know what it takes to make tough decisions. And also how to not make tough decisions, and how to avoid decisions while sounding tough. That is the lesson of Vietnam. As a young man I defended this country-- TRUMP: John. KERRY: Hm? TRUMP: I'm going to stop you there, John, before you go any further. The whole Vietnam thing. It's all you ever talk about. It was thirty years ago, John. KERRY: It's seared-- seared -- into my memory. TRUMP: John, at this point your Vietnam experience is seared into my memory. I have to tell you. It's just one bullet-point on your resume. A lot of men have been in Vietnam. I was in Vietnam. Tell him about my tour in Vietnam, Carolyn. CAROLYN: Uhhh, I don't think you ever fought in Vietnam, Mr. Trump. TRUMP: Well I've seen movies. Tell him about the Vietnam movies I watch. CAROLYN: Um, which one? TRUMP: You know. The one I like. Where they're living in a house right on the Pacific Ocean, and they've got a speedboat and a bunch of cool cars, and they have this little nerdy friend who has a little robot pal he calls "Roboz." CAROLYN: That's not a Vietnam movie. I think you mean the mid-eighties action series "Riptide." TRUMP: That's the one. It was a living hell. Thank God Nixon got us out of there when he did.
(adjusts tie; turns to another candidate)
You. You're quiet in all this. What do you have to say for yourself? Should you be fired for this loss?
MICHAEL MOORE: I don't think so.
TRUMP: Why not? What did you contribute to the team? MOORE: I wrote, directed, and starred in the highest-grossing documentary of all time, a film that bravely exposed the corruption and incompetence of the Bush Administration. I won the Palm d'Or at Cannes, I swept the balloting at the Golden Globes, I won the-- TRUMP: Can I ask you a question? MOORE: Yes. TRUMP: While you were winning all these awards, did you ever think to yourself, hey, maybe I should shave once in a while? Maybe, you know, tuck my shirt in? Maybe I could afford to drop a couple dozen pounds? Appearances count in business, Mike. MOORE: I dress as what I am. I'm a proud son of blue collar parents, a lifetime resident of Flint, Michigan-- TRUMP: Mike, you live in one of my buildings. You pay me rent every month. I know, because you're always trying to pay me in buffalo wings. MOORE: But my primary residence-- TRUMP: Is a half mile away from my breathtaking Mar-a-Largo estate in Palm Beach. We belong to the same country club. You practically live at the aromatherapy spa. So, you know, knock it off with the working class hero crap. And, quite frankly, working class doesn't mean obese and unkempt.(unsure; turns to Carolyn)
It doesn't, does it? CAROLYN: It's not required, no. TRUMP: That's what I thought. Because I know I see a lot of working class women that are in pretty damn good shape. Not as beautiful as my beautiful fiance Melania, of course. But still-- they put themselves together pretty nice. I'd take a run at them, I'll tell you that. BLACKIE LAWLESS: I have a question for Mike, Mr. Trump. TRUMP: Shoot. BLACKIE LAWLESS: ARE YOU -- READY -- TO -- ROOOOCKKKK?!!? (Mike seems stunned and frightened) TRUMP: Well, are you, Mike? Are you ready to rock? MIKE: I, uh, don't know. I don't think so. TRUMP: Does that answer your question, Blackie? BLACKIE: I have nothing further. TRUMP: And that's a key to success in business, Mike. If someone asks you if you are ready to rock, you have to be prepared without a moment's hesitation to say, "Yes sir, I am ready to rock. And rock hard." But you don't rock. You're a schlub, Mike. And that documentary you made, Mike? What was that all about? That turned people off, Mike. MIKE: I won the New York Critic's Circle award for-- TRUMP: Mike, it was a bad documentary. Half of what you said wasn't true and the other half was just you walking around in your big-and-tall-man's jeans and annoying the crap out of people on the street. A good documentary presents a compelling factual narrative, moving people to take interest in a worthy cause. Like that documentary I like. What's that documentary I like, Carolyn? CAROLYN: I'm afraid I need more information. TRUMP: You know, the one where they live in a beach house in Malibu and solve crimes by driving around speedboats and clowning around with their little robotic chum. CAROLYN: Ummm... do you mean Riptide again, Mr. Trump? TRUMP: Riptide, that's it. Chilling stuff. Powerful. Moved me to actual tears.
(beat)
All right. Outstanding. Now we're really getting to the heart of this fiasco. Now, you. You over there. Who are you again? JOHN EDWARDS: I'm Senator John Edwards of North Carolina, Mr. Trump. TRUMP: I can't have two Johns in the boardroom. It's too confusing. I'm just going to call you Tina. Now, Tina, where the hell were you when all of this was going on? I don't remember you doing anything to bring this task to a successful conclusion. "TINA": I gave my media-approved "Two Americas" speech at many rallies, I -- TRUMP: Yeah, but what the hell did you actually do, Tina? Talking is one thing. But business is about doing. "TINA": I, well, I did what I was asked to do. If I was underutilized, then that's the project manager's fault. JOHN KERRY: I didn't underutilize you. In Vietnam I learned-- TRUMP: Save it, Sergeant Rock. I'm talking to Tina. Business is about being a self-starter, Tina, and going where the action is. But you just sat around and looked pretty. And I admit you are pretty. You're like a clean-cut Shaun Cassidy. Or like that one, the youngest brother of the Bee Gees, the one with the beautiful hair. You know the one, Carolyn. CAROLYN: Andy Gibb. TRUMP: No, not Andy Gibb. You know, the youngest brother of the Bee Gees, the good-looking one, the one who drove around a Corvette and helicopter and solved crimes as part of a beachfront detective agency. CAROLYN (cocking head like a serpent): Uhhhh... you mean, um, Perry King, star of Riptide? TRUMP: Exactly. Perry King. It's too bad he died so young. I think he had another Shadow Dancing in him. He will be missed.
(beat)
So, anyway, Tina. I like you. I think you're pretty. I'd love to take you to my beautiful mansion in the Hamptons some time and dress you up in Christian Dior originals. But I really don't think you added anything to this team.
(looks around the table)
And I guess that leaves you. Now you-- you really screwed up. Blackie tells me he was embarrassed for you, and he's a fifty year old man wearing assless chaps. DAN RATHER: Mr. Trump, I went above and beyond the call of duty to bring this project to a successful conclusion. TRUMP: Right. You put those forgeries on the air. Kind of ended up hurting the cause, didn't it? DAN RATHER: I did my best. I'm a Texas newsman, Mr. Trump, and I go to where the story is, no matter who might be angry about. Not the White House, not political partisans on the Internet-- TRUMP: Dan, I've gotta be honest. Those were some really bad forgeries. They were ridiculous. RATHER: We put them through the most intense fact-checking possible-- TRUMP: Dan, one of them was scribbled on the front of a Taco Bell tray-liner. It said that George Bush was to be suspended for flying for failing to complete a required gordita. And it gave the name of his Air National Guard unit as "Extra Spicy." I've seen better work, Dan. RATHER: I've had forty years in the business-- TRUMP: Do you think maybe you've had ten years too many, Dan? Be honest. It didn't take much to prove you were wrong. It just took those, what do you call them-- CAROLYN: Internet bloggers. TRUMP: Right. It just took a bunch of unpaid, untrained internet bloggers to show that your documents were hoaxes. They just had to do a little bit of research, then drive around in Corvettes while sending their little robot friend out to collect clues and then they were back at the beachhouse drinking beer within an hour. Like on that show. CAROLYN: Riptide. TRUMP: No, that's not the one I'm thinking of. The one with Nell Carter. Gimme a Break. That's it. She had sass.
(beat)
Anyway, you embarassed your team, Dan. You made your team look foolish in front of the public. And that's an unforgiveable sin in business. (thinks; then sums up) TRUMP: So I don't know here. It's a tough call. I've got one guy who thinks it's still 1969 and Inna Gada Da Vida is still tracking on the Billboard charts. I have another guy who apparently works in a donut shop and takes his work home with him. I've got "Tina," who quite frankly I'd like to date after I divorce my lovely fiance Melanea, which I think will probably be sometime next spring, but who contributes nothing except a dazzling smile and a killer set of gams. And then I've got this sad old buffoon peddling cheap hoaxes on national television, making a complete jackass out of himself and an entire news organization. (music rises, tensely) TRUMP: But in the end I think there's only one decision possible.
(points quickly, but vaguely)
You're fired. (silence) JOHN KERRY: Ummm... who's fired? Which one? TRUMP: All of you. You're all fired. You've all been incompetent, useless, vicious, dishonest or outright corrupt from start to finish. You're all fired, and I don't want to ever see any of you in public life again. You can leave now. Out. (slowly and sadly, the stunned candidates exit the boardroom) (Trump ponders his decision, then discusses it with his aides) TRUMP: I think I did the right thing. CAROLYN: You had to do it. It was an easy call. BLACKIE LAWLESS: None of them are qualified to run one of your companies, Mr. Trump. Or a network news division. And certainly not the United States of America, the greatest country on the face of God's earth. TRUMP: That's very well put, whoever the hell you are. And what do you think? ROBOT BUDDY: It was the logical outcome. Keeping any of them would not have computed. TRUMP: Thank you, Roboz. You know how much I depend on your counsel. Now, let's get back to the beach house and track down those counterfeiters. CAROLYN: I'll prep the chopper. TRUMP: You do that. Team, it's time to rip it. (end scene as they all dash towards a speedboat)
Comments
(Jump to bottom of comments)Posted by: pkudude99 at December 26, 2023 04:40 PM (Q+TxG)
Posted by: Stumbo at December 26, 2023 04:40 PM (+s/+g)
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at December 26, 2023 04:42 PM (BpYfr)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 04:42 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: wth at December 26, 2023 04:42 PM (v0R5T)
Can I call 'em or what?
Posted by: Archimedes at December 26, 2023 04:43 PM (CsUN+)
There was a lot of good humor on this side of the net back in the day.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 04:43 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, anti-Marxist, buy ammo and keep your rifle by your side at December 26, 2023 04:44 PM (xcxpd)
Posted by: Archer at December 26, 2023 04:44 PM (gmo/4)
Posted by: San Franpsycho at December 26, 2023 04:45 PM (RIvkX)
Posted by: Ace's mom at December 26, 2023 04:46 PM (RIvkX)
Posted by: Archimedes at December 26, 2023 04:46 PM (CsUN+)
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 04:46 PM (tT6L1)
Posted by: Archimedes at December 26, 2023 04:46 PM (CsUN+)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 04:47 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: NR Pax at December 26, 2023 04:48 PM (5+9sG)
I'm blind in Texas, the cowboys have taken my eyes"
Posted by: Dr. Bone at December 26, 2023 04:48 PM (J3ryZ)
Posted by: San Franpsycho at December 26, 2023 04:48 PM (RIvkX)
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 04:48 PM (n+5ul)
Posted by: NR Pax at December 26, 2023 04:48 PM (5+9sG)
Posted by: XTC at December 26, 2023 04:48 PM (sm6Pk)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 04:49 PM (x42Y3)
Razorfists's Metal Mythos of W.A.S.P - leading off with Blackie Lawless
https://youtu.be/YVjYs_NDoV8
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, anti-Marxist, buy ammo and keep your rifle by your side at December 26, 2023 04:49 PM (xcxpd)
Posted by: macbrooks at December 26, 2023 04:49 PM (sWzaJ)
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 26, 2023 04:50 PM (MoZTd)
Posted by: Archimedes at December 26, 2023 04:50 PM (CsUN+)
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 04:50 PM (n+5ul)
Ace of Spades blog today!
Ace of Spades blog today!
Ace of Spades blog today!
Now let me introduce you you! The one and only Dummy Lamont!
(Refrain)
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 04:50 PM (tT6L1)
Most revered blog award going on 20 years now.
Posted by: Mark in SC at December 26, 2023 04:50 PM (ue/3w)
Posted by: Duncanthrax at December 26, 2023 04:51 PM (a3Q+t)
Posted by: Matthew Kant Cipher at December 26, 2023 04:51 PM (kOluj)
Posted by: L - They don't have to outrun the bear, they only need to outrun us - for now at December 26, 2023 04:51 PM (GshMh)
Posted by: neverenoughcaffeine at December 26, 2023 04:51 PM (2NHgQ)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 04:51 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: nckate at December 26, 2023 04:52 PM (/Qr3T)
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at December 26, 2023 04:52 PM (Gsmsg)
Posted by: San Franpsycho at December 26, 2023 04:52 PM (RIvkX)
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 26, 2023 04:52 PM (MoZTd)
The astonishing thing is that Rather's STILL trying to rehabilitate himself. Not gonna happen, Danny boy.
Posted by: Archimedes at December 26, 2023 04:52 PM (CsUN+)
Posted by: Archimedes at December 26, 2023 04:52 PM (CsUN+)
Posted by: Wesley Crusher at December 26, 2023 04:53 PM (a3Q+t)
So very glad I stumbled into this place, though I have lurked most of the time.
Thank you, sir.....
Posted by: Appycay at December 26, 2023 04:53 PM (EdYR/)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 04:53 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: morigu at December 26, 2023 04:53 PM (32Vy5)
A lot like Pete Rose his redemption will require his expiration.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 04:53 PM (X0I7i)
As I recently found some lint-covered coins in my couch cushions, maybe you could tell us all how to contribute?
That paypal link seems outdated.....
Posted by: goatexchange at December 26, 2023 04:53 PM (hyS0X)
Posted by: Question Authority bumper sticker at December 26, 2023 04:53 PM (Rbu5d)
Don't tell Ace. It's supposed to be a secret.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at December 26, 2023 04:54 PM (Gsmsg)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 04:54 PM (FQmDC)
I think I stumbled on to it in early 2004 or thereabouts. Been required daily reading ever since.
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at December 26, 2023 04:54 PM (BpYfr)
Posted by: The Barrel at December 26, 2023 04:54 PM (a3Q+t)
Posted by: Archimedes at December 26, 2023 04:54 PM (CsUN+)
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 26, 2023 04:55 PM (MoZTd)
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 04:55 PM (tT6L1)
Posted by: San Franpsycho at December 26, 2023 04:55 PM (RIvkX)
* beckons *
I dance on the rim but I never fall in.
Posted by: Archimedes at December 26, 2023 04:55 PM (CsUN+)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 04:55 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: Notorious BFD at December 26, 2023 04:55 PM (V8he0)
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at December 26, 2023 04:56 PM (66s2O)
Posted by: Archimedes at December 26, 2023 04:56 PM (CsUN+)
Posted by: dantesed at December 26, 2023 04:56 PM (193FS)
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 26, 2023 04:55 PM (MoZTd)
I don't know, but I heard that at the exact moment they're going to drop a bucket of paint on Times Square.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at December 26, 2023 04:56 PM (Gsmsg)
Also, augury, or even adumbratey.
Posted by: Archimedes
.......
and cromulent.
Posted by: wth at December 26, 2023 04:56 PM (v0R5T)
Posted by: Smell the Glove at December 26, 2023 04:57 PM (iYJk7)
Posted by: morigu at December 26, 2023 04:58 PM (32Vy5)
Posted by: neverenoughcaffeine at December 26, 2023 04:58 PM (2NHgQ)
Well the linking from LGF and IP to here helped...
hell Ace got linked at Matrixgames, and even Ed Popping Fresh's "Captain's Quarters" and then Tepid Err....
first argument for gateway drugs that made sense.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 04:58 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Count de Monet at December 26, 2023 04:58 PM (4I/2K)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 04:58 PM (FQmDC)
Posted by: Tuna at December 26, 2023 04:58 PM (oaGWv)
It would elevate the show to a higher plane of thought.
Posted by: Evil Incarnate at December 26, 2023 04:58 PM (klYmV)
I ask one thing of you all here... Please remember who funds the anti-Trump movement; many of them recently gave a communist pig(Xi) a standing ovation in San Fran a few weeks ago.
Many of us served when communism was still a thing in East Germany and then when many of our 'leaders' favored Chinese communists(Bush Family).
Love to all,
Posted by: Danimal28 at December 26, 2023 04:59 PM (ryUqI)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 04:59 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: JackStraw at December 26, 2023 04:59 PM (ZLI7S)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 04:58 PM (FQmDC)
This comment is an excellent example of the intense topical focus we see here every day at the HQ.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at December 26, 2023 05:00 PM (Gsmsg)
Posted by: Skip at December 26, 2023 05:00 PM (fwDg9)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 05:01 PM (FQmDC)
Quite, watching the slow rise of "Stasi Style" here has been illuminating....
if you have not watched it check out Deutschland 83.
https://youtu.be/cTVl53_j-vg?si=fnVZs0ux5NVfGljI
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:01 PM (X0I7i)
Happy birthday, AOSHQ.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at December 26, 2023 05:01 PM (olroh)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:01 PM (X0I7i)
Thanks Ace.
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at December 26, 2023 05:01 PM (66s2O)
Quite amazing.
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:01 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 05:02 PM (n+5ul)
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at December 26, 2023 05:02 PM (Gsmsg)
Posted by: dantesed at December 26, 2023 05:02 PM (193FS)
But I couldn't help myself. Rielle was just so hot.
Posted by: John Edwards at December 26, 2023 05:02 PM (klYmV)
Posted by: Skip at December 26, 2023 05:02 PM (fwDg9)
Posted by: pawn at December 26, 2023 05:02 PM (QB+5g)
I missed this one the first time around, Ace. Thanks! I look forward to more looks back this week.
Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at December 26, 2023 05:02 PM (OX9vb)
The Rousters I believe which chronicled the misfit adventures of one the Earp descendants....
https://youtu.be/ixyZqR2gGOk?si=g_vtB9f-oF-TUmgo
Jim Varney
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:02 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 05:02 PM (FQmDC)
Posted by: JT at December 26, 2023 05:02 PM (T4tVD)
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:03 PM (tT6L1)
Posted by: ace at December 26, 2023 05:03 PM (KRtlO)
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at December 26, 2023 05:04 PM (BdMk6)
Posted by: dantesed at December 26, 2023 05:02 PM (193FS)
I thought that was Johnny Dollar's job.
Posted by: XTC at December 26, 2023 05:04 PM (sm6Pk)
I'm pretty sure that it initiates the 7th sign of the Apocalypse and Lena Dunam sits on you after a whole bag of 20 year old Doritos (which in case it is lost on you contained Olestra and caused anal leakage).
Posted by: Orson at December 26, 2023 05:04 PM (dIske)
But I couldn't help myself. Rielle was just so hot.
Posted by: John Edwards
And she was a Hunter.
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at December 26, 2023 05:04 PM (66s2O)
also possible that my sense of humor has atrophied over the years
Posted by: sock_rat_eez - these lying bastardi e stronzi have been lying for decades at December 26, 2023 05:04 PM (kc18b)
Some of the Rather stuff and/or the ode to Kaboom my dear man.
Hope the New Year finds you well.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:04 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at December 26, 2023 05:04 PM (BdMk6)
The classics are never not funny.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at December 26, 2023 05:05 PM (Gsmsg)
Posted by: goatexchange at December 26, 2023 04:53 PM (hyS0X)
--------
I used it just now with no issue - maybe try a different browser?
Posted by: Matthew Kant Cipher at December 26, 2023 05:05 PM (kOluj)
20 tears?
Is there anything left of his rectum to stitch back together?!
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 05:05 PM (n+5ul)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:05 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 26, 2023 05:06 PM (NYzgN)
Posted by: sock_rat_eez - these lying bastardi e stronzi have been lying for decades at December 26, 2023 05:06 PM (kc18b)
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:06 PM (tT6L1)
Posted by: Isolden at December 26, 2023 05:06 PM (dB99g)
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at December 26, 2023 05:06 PM (olroh)
Posted by: look whats not at December 26, 2023 05:06 PM (nakGR)
8 Actually.
It was up on the fridge for a good 6 months before we got him a computer.
Posted by: Ace's Mom at December 26, 2023 05:06 PM (n+5ul)
He gets stabbed in the chest by a bicycle wielded by none other than Alice Cooper. Though Cooper was not wearing assless chaps, as far as I can recall...
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at December 26, 2023 05:07 PM (BpYfr)
There must be dozens to choose from. There were some very funny stuff you stole from Jonah Goldberg back then.
Posted by: JackStraw at December 26, 2023 05:07 PM (ZLI7S)
I'm in love with Ace's mom
Posted by: The Fountains of Wayne at December 26, 2023 05:07 PM (Gsmsg)
Hunter?
Hunter was on ABC and the one chick's tits may have been in the 10 o'clock slot back then even shod as it were.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:07 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 05:08 PM (FQmDC)
Posted by: It's me donna at December 26, 2023 05:08 PM (n2vyf)
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at December 26, 2023 04:54 PM (BpYfr)
Sometime in 2004 for me, also. Sucked in for life.
Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at December 26, 2023 05:08 PM (OX9vb)
Trump is running for President again.
Blackie Lawless is a Christian.
Michael Moore was last seen eating leftover chicken wings and pizza outside a frat house in Lansing.
Posted by: Puddleglum, observer of meaningless bowl games at December 26, 2023 05:08 PM (sAmhv)
Posted by: sock_rat_eez - these lying bastardi e stronzi have been lying for decades at December 26, 2023 05:04 PM
Cold water can do that.
Posted by: George Constanza at December 26, 2023 05:08 PM (a3Q+t)
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 26, 2023 05:09 PM (NYzgN)
Posted by: Dr. Bone at December 26, 2023 05:09 PM (J3ryZ)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 05:09 PM (FQmDC)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:09 PM (X0I7i)
And to think, when this was written some of those Mannix girls weren't even born yet.
Posted by: Diogenes at December 26, 2023 05:09 PM (W/lyH)
Posted by: MAGA_Ken at December 26, 2023 05:09 PM (cMXNt)
Posted by: Question Authority bumper sticker at December 26, 2023 05:09 PM (Rbu5d)
SOVEREIGN CITIZEN MOORISH AMERICAN GETS DENIED ACCESS TO A PUBLIC RESTROOM IN STARBUCKS ON HIS LAND
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:10 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:10 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 05:10 PM (n+5ul)
This is the funniest thing I've read in ages. Ace, if you'd ended it with trump wondering whether he'd just have to do the job himself, we'd have to say Life Imitates Ace instead of Life Imitates the Simpsons.
Posted by: Blonde Morticia's phone at December 26, 2023 05:11 PM (n7rxJ)
9/11 bypassed his sensible Soc Sec reform....
I think the Clinton impeachment and the donk rage at it coupled with 9/11 will be looked back at as the beginning of the end.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:11 PM (X0I7i)
https://youtu.be/BNA1FLUBoTg
The year matches up with the house I remember watching it in, which we only lived in from 1984-1985.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at December 26, 2023 05:11 PM (olroh)
Posted by: Cat Ass Trophy at December 26, 2023 05:06 PM (NYzgN)
He was a destined child.
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at December 26, 2023 05:12 PM (BdMk6)
For what it's worth, Lawless is a born-again Christian these days. He says that he can perform such classic s as "Animal (F**k Like A Beast) with a clear conscience, because he's using backing vocal tracks and not actually singing them.
Posted by: Mr. FAFO at December 26, 2023 05:12 PM (phEsr)
Posted by: Skip at December 26, 2023 05:12 PM (fwDg9)
Remington Steele just seemed like Cannell....
I really did not like like Fred Dyer as an actor.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:12 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Question Authority bumper sticker at December 26, 2023 05:12 PM (Rbu5d)
Posted by: Cheri at December 26, 2023 05:13 PM (oiNtH)
Dayum.
Posted by: Montec at December 26, 2023 05:13 PM (bWsRe)
Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at December 26, 2023 05:14 PM (yWvc2)
http://tinyurl.com/36xp6vep
Posted by: Duncanthrax at December 26, 2023 05:14 PM (a3Q+t)
Posted by: goatexchange at December 26, 2023 04:53 PM (hyS0X)
Use the widget/icon, and not the link underneath it.
Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at December 26, 2023 05:14 PM (OX9vb)
20 years on, who would have thought that Instapundit would be a shell of itself, coblogged by NeverTrumpers and a commenteriat half of whom are insane.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 26, 2023 05:14 PM (MoZTd)
I don’t remember how I found it, but I do remember where I came from. The Kevin Smith View Askew forums, which for a short period had a great group of people to hang out with.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at December 26, 2023 05:14 PM (olroh)
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 26, 2023 05:15 PM (0FoWg)
Posted by: goatexchange at December 26, 2023 05:16 PM (hyS0X)
Eh Glenn is chasing immortality, Greene was a good pundit once upon a time and Ed "the other dumbass named Ed" Driscoll is well Ed Driscoll.
The "insane" commentariat is largely the psyops campaign waged on any influential PJ Media linked commentary by either DOJ assets or contractors working for favored non-profs.
Johnny and JCC make the place damn near unreadable.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:16 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:17 PM (tT6L1)
Imagine if he took off the Messenger Bag and traded the Vespa in for a Harley!
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 05:17 PM (n+5ul)
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 26, 2023 05:15 PM
So, BC.
(Before Crocs)
Posted by: Duncanthrax at December 26, 2023 05:17 PM (a3Q+t)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:17 PM (x42Y3)
If The Apprentice was half this fun, I regret not watching it.
Posted by: Blonde Morticia's phone at December 26, 2023 05:17 PM (n7rxJ)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 05:09 PM (FQmDC)
Ace was one of Chucky's links at the time. I flounced from there when that prick threatened to ban me for disagreeing with his opinion on how schools should pick their classroom books.
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at December 26, 2023 05:18 PM (BdMk6)
Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in solidarity with the struggle to maintain Moron standards at December 26, 2023 05:18 PM (VLtO5)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:16 PM (X0I7i)
----
Yeah, they're obviously paid disruptors.
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:18 PM (tT6L1)
Maet left back in the run up or aftermath of the Trump wars...
I miss Monty and DOOM!
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:18 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Hairyback Guy at December 26, 2023 05:19 PM (R/m4+)
"It's a blog."
"OK...what blog?"
"It's called Ace of Spades."
Posted by: Diogenes at December 26, 2023 05:19 PM (W/lyH)
Posted by: Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in solidarity with the struggle to maintain Moron standards at December 26, 2023 05:18 PM (VLtO5)
And what is it if it's temporary?
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at December 26, 2023 05:19 PM (Gsmsg)
20 years on, who would have thought that Instapundit would be a shell of itself, coblogged by NeverTrumpers and a commenteriat half of whom are insane.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh
================
To say nothing of Little Green Footballs.
Posted by: Blonde Morticia's phone at December 26, 2023 05:19 PM (n7rxJ)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:18 PM (X0I7i)
----
Laura W and CDRM
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:19 PM (tT6L1)
>Holy crap. I've known John Bush from Armored Saint for more years than I have read this blog.
Posted by: Dr. Bone at December 26, 2023 05:19 PM (J3ryZ)
Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea, Radioactive Knight at December 26, 2023 05:20 PM (ScR16)
Posted by: AZ Hi Desert (Gringo fuertemente armado-Tempus belli) at December 26, 2023 05:20 PM (l7Kbv)
(Seriously, it's been one of the parts of the last 14 years I would repeat in a heartbeat. May it last another 20 at least...)
Posted by: Brother Tim sez Max Headroom for President! at December 26, 2023 05:20 PM (OUMaO)
One of the most rewarding things in my cruising the web are when sub 10,000 post idiots take the fact that I walked away from the group in 2016 to be my "being a newb" at Insty's....
Like I said to one fool, "Glenn has been one of my followers on the net since 2005."
The Jazz Flautist at LGF is confused why he doesn't matter anymore, but he has his lunatics and donkey hangers on to keep him going.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:21 PM (X0I7i)
I remember the story that *almost* got Ace on Fox News. I'll say no more except glad he's had a success here and my discomfiture about ending up on the 'wall of shame' last week.
I actually need to find a way to say less. Better pithy.
Posted by: Divide by Zero at December 26, 2023 05:21 PM (enJYY)
Posted by: Tuna at December 26, 2023 05:21 PM (oaGWv)
I do remember thinking that back in the day.
And while I didn’t watch it regularly, I do remember occasionally enjoying Hardcastle & McCormick.
But Brian Keith will always be Mitch Evers to me.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at December 26, 2023 05:21 PM (olroh)
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:21 PM (u82oZ)
I even miss Drew some days....
I do not miss Mabriel.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:21 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:22 PM (x42Y3)
Especially a second Allahpundit who is, somehow, against all odds, a worse writer with an even more banal worldview.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 26, 2023 05:22 PM (0FoWg)
What's better, being first and flaming out, or keeping it up for two decades?
I stand in awe of the AOS brand. Take it from the most unforgiving critic you will ever meet: you're not doing it wrong.
Posted by: Tom Perry at December 26, 2023 05:22 PM (MX0bI)
Posted by: washrivergal at December 26, 2023 05:22 PM (CmpAD)
SOVEREIGN CITIZEN MOORISH AMERICAN GETS DENIED ACCESS TO A PUBLIC RESTROOM IN STARBUCKS ON HIS LAND
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:10 PM (X0I7i)
He's just hangry because he doesn't know how to use indoor plumbing.
It frightens and confuses him.
Posted by: Hairyback Guy at December 26, 2023 05:23 PM (R/m4+)
I came over here when a bunch of Morons came over to Villainous Company to have a cross-blog discussion.
Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at December 26, 2023 05:23 PM (OX9vb)
Posted by: qmark at December 26, 2023 05:23 PM (+t9Oi)
Posted by: No Shirt Shylock at December 26, 2023 05:23 PM (PWI4f)
*sighs*
Posted by: Dr. T at December 26, 2023 05:23 PM (jGGMD)
The infiltration and rise of Anal Pundit and friends there signaled that the right media is largely "kept."
Jazz "Hands" Shaw was my "really this is the best you can do Slay'em?" moment.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:24 PM (X0I7i)
Didn't we raid NRO at one point? It was right around the time of the Peace Blimp, I think.
Back when we would take the Horde on the road.
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 05:24 PM (n+5ul)
Posted by: No Shirt Shylock
There's been a lot of that...I'm on my 3rd nic...
Posted by: Brother Tim sez Max Headroom for President! at December 26, 2023 05:24 PM (OUMaO)
Posted by: spongeworthy at December 26, 2023 05:25 PM (DWqKI)
I was thinking about link that, but I can't find the old post.
Posted by: ace at December 26, 2023 05:25 PM (KRtlO)
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here at December 26, 2023 05:25 PM (FVME7)
http://tinyurl.com/36xp6vep
Posted by: Duncanthrax
That explains a lot.
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at December 26, 2023 05:25 PM (66s2O)
Posted by: Joe Biden at December 26, 2023 05:25 PM (63Dwl)
Posted by: Count de Monet at December 26, 2023 05:25 PM (4I/2K)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:24 PM (X0I7i)
Never could stand that closet queen either. Never saw a badge that didn't send him into asstrus.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 26, 2023 05:25 PM (0FoWg)
I used to go to Hot Air to get the humpbot. It had a good community, but not as good as here.
I reported the 9/12/2009 March on Washington on Hot Air. Allahpundit and Ed went crazy later, but I was already here. Only 14 years.
I'm a baby compared to the old sweets.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:26 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 26, 2023 05:15 PM (0FoWg)
I found it in 2010 via HotAir. Clicked because the title seemed interesting, busted a gut laughing at all the Ewok memes, and that was that.
Posted by: Dr. T at December 26, 2023 05:26 PM (jGGMD)
LOL. I remember humpbot.
Posted by: Tuna at December 26, 2023 05:27 PM (oaGWv)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:27 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:27 PM (u82oZ)
I was thinking about link that, but I can't find the old post.
Posted by: ace
You know it's linked on the front page of your blog, right?
http://ace-o-spades.blogspot.com/2004_01_01_
ace-o-spades_archive.html#107342255738179485
Posted by: Brother Tim sez Max Headroom for President! at December 26, 2023 05:28 PM (OUMaO)
Posted by: Smell the Glove at December 26, 2023 05:28 PM (iYJk7)
Maybe occasionally before that.
Posted by: wth at December 26, 2023 05:28 PM (v0R5T)
Posted by: Tom Servo at December 26, 2023 05:28 PM (S6gqv)
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here at December 26, 2023 05:28 PM (FVME7)
You could see them flipping by April of 08....
and yeah a lot of us tend to run in a pack at several places on the circuit.
I was shocked thinking back on who Patterico once was versus who he is now.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (u82oZ)
That was a hell of a 3 bank shot.
Posted by: JackStraw at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (ZLI7S)
Next up: Rice vs. Texas State.
Posted by: Puddleglum, observer of meaningless bowl games at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (sAmhv)
love it! do not remember it
but then again I used to have a brain and stuff, way back then
I hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas! mine is still ongoing so I just wanted to pop in and say hey
hey!
Posted by: BlackOrchid, I meant to say at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (AcWfM)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:27 PM (x42Y3)
No. That Berenstein Bears story was just an urban legend.
Posted by: Dr. T at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (jGGMD)
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (tkR6S)
Posted by: washrivergal at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (CmpAD)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:22 PM (x42Y3)
Yes. Nigel von Spades.
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (BdMk6)
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:26 PM (u82oZ)
----
I want to say I've been here about 8 years.
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:30 PM (tT6L1)
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at December 26, 2023 05:30 PM (olroh)
ChemJeff is Esoteric or Assoteric CD on twatter yeah?
I have lost track in the last five years was he the chemist who debauched students or the other one?
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:30 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Dr. Bone at December 26, 2023 05:30 PM (J3ryZ)
Ace rebuked me once for doubting his shelving install progress. "My shelves are bomb-proof."
Needed more than ever in NYC.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:30 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: Puddleglum, observer of meaningless bowl games at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (sAmhv)
Don't throw it to Stone Hands!
Posted by: Coach Riggs at December 26, 2023 05:31 PM (4I/2K)
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here at December 26, 2023 05:28 PM (FVME7)
You get us someting nice, prease!
Posted by: China at December 26, 2023 05:31 PM (jGGMD)
The other one. He should be up for tenure soon. I keep track of him, as he is at a University in the wider region.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:31 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: No Shirt Shylock at December 26, 2023 05:32 PM (PWI4f)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (X0I7i)
-----
Yeah, he went off the rails almost as quickly as LGF.
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:32 PM (tT6L1)
Posted by: Puddleglum, observer of meaningless bowl games at December 26, 2023 05:32 PM (sAmhv)
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here at December 26, 2023 05:32 PM (FVME7)
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:27 PM (u82oZ)
LOL Yes he is.
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at December 26, 2023 05:32 PM (BdMk6)
Posted by: Archimedes at December 26, 2023 04:46 PM (CsUN+)
Gawd you make me feel old.
Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at December 26, 2023 05:33 PM (Mzdiz)
Carry on, Ace.
Posted by: Don Black at December 26, 2023 05:33 PM (geLO8)
No, but I have made a lot of snazzy comments on Twitter. That's basically the same thing, right?
Posted by: Dr. T at December 26, 2023 05:33 PM (jGGMD)
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at December 26, 2023 05:33 PM (BdMk6)
Please accept my heartfelt thanks for you, your CoBs, the open bloggers, and your community.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:33 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: Ben Had at December 26, 2023 05:34 PM (PKEqY)
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 05:34 PM (n+5ul)
Then there was Mau Mau and his wife or the electric car or his wife the electric car who hated AR-15s....
man there have been a lot of people here.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:34 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:34 PM (x42Y3)
Jeff B is the one in Chicago with the wife and the kid who is facing school problems driven by the people he elected right?
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:34 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 05:35 PM (n+5ul)
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair
When Dick Cheney or someone posted I thought, "Holy shit! He posts here?"
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here at December 26, 2023 05:35 PM (FVME7)
Posted by: Formerly Arson Welles at December 26, 2023 05:35 PM (vxWW4)
Posted by: Humphreyrobot at December 26, 2023 05:35 PM (J8LnB)
I have lost track in the last five years was he the chemist who debauched students or the other one?
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:30 PM (X0I7i)
----
I want to say ChemJeff was back for about a minute before Jim New Sunk got tired of him and panted him for all to see.
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:35 PM (tT6L1)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:34 PM (x42Y3)
++++
I don't know, but only one of those has banned himself.
Posted by: washrivergal at December 26, 2023 05:35 PM (CmpAD)
I remember when ace was pissed at us for being us and giving us a stern lecture which we no doubt deserved. WP was going on about something completely oblivious to the lecture and ace was getting increasingly angry. You could practically see his head popping off.
Dave in Texas and I were laughing our asses off.
Posted by: JackStraw at December 26, 2023 05:35 PM (ZLI7S)
EOJ, DL, MP4 being scarceish compared to the old days....
of course I post about 1/10th my peak.
I miss a lot of people.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:36 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:34 PM (x42Y3)
ace. He's a bad mutherf..... (hush your mouf!)
I was talkin' 'bout ace! He once banned all of us.
Posted by: Count de Monet at December 26, 2023 05:36 PM (4I/2K)
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:36 PM (tT6L1)
Posted by: andycanuck (2yu8s) at December 26, 2023 05:36 PM (2yu8s)
Please accept my heartfelt thanks for you, your CoBs, the open bloggers, and your community.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:33 PM (u82oZ)
229 Thank you, ace. The great commentary, laugh until you cry humor and the wonderful friends I have met through this site are beyond words.
Posted by: Ben Had at December 26, 2023 05:34 PM (PKEqY)
Both of these, can't be said enough. Thanks Ace, and community.
Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at December 26, 2023 05:37 PM (OX9vb)
Jim is awesome, so is AOP.
There are so many awesome rons and ettes on the ONT I am not needed anymore.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:37 PM (X0I7i)
And I also have to thank Allahpundit, for linking to you from time to time. I guess I've been reading the blog for over 15 years, even if I was mostly lurking.
Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at December 26, 2023 05:37 PM (Mzdiz)
The library and University President wants Overhead money. This is known.
Maybe it is more cut throat in the sciences. I published ahead of a German chemist who had been working on synthesizing a molecule for 4 years. I beat him by 3 months, and he got no credit.
I wanted to use my group duties as keeping the 3 solvent stills water and oxygen free for a NEH grant called - Still Life -. My boss was not amused.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:38 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: andycanuck (2yu8s) at December 26, 2023 05:38 PM (2yu8s)
I want to say ChemJeff was back for about a minute before Jim New Sunk got tired of him and panted him for all to see.
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:35 PM
Would've been almost exactly two years ago. I remember it vividly because I was reading it in a hospital room. Hilarious. Brutal.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 26, 2023 05:38 PM (0FoWg)
This was probably around 2007 or 2008.
That sh*t was funny.
Posted by: Thomas Bender at December 26, 2023 05:38 PM (XV/Pl)
Posted by: Diogenes at December 26, 2023 05:38 PM (W/lyH)
and himself...
then there was the time the blog looked like it would blink out of existence and we went to the backup place that has a better GUI and happily "less paper trail."
Those were the days.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:38 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:29 PM (X0I7i)
I can't speak for others, but a big reason I keep coming back is because of how consistent Ace has been--that is, his specific positions have changed on a lot of things, but never in a way that feels like a sellout to the Left, and that's generally true of the co-bloggers and most commenters as well. Which can't be said for a lot of blogs, when you think about it.
It's a much-needed reassurance that I'm not going crazy.
Posted by: Dr. T at December 26, 2023 05:38 PM (jGGMD)
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 26, 2023 05:15 PM (0FoWg)
~~~~~
Malkin sold Hot Air in 2010. I remember coming here from Hot Air long before that, and I left Hot Air not long after she sold. Heh. Back then I used to check Drudge from my work computer.
Took me a long time to comment though, and one of the first encounters I had in the comment section was with Nevergiveup, who was arguing with me about Trump and eminent domain.
Posted by: IrishEi at December 26, 2023 05:39 PM (OqZFJ)
/sarc
Posted by: Marcus T at December 26, 2023 05:39 PM (XYrRT)
Since that time, my wifey's cell phone feed is AoS-adjacent, as Ace stuff pops up about a half-hour before hers. Ace is indeed a global Media Empire now.
Posted by: goatexchange at December 26, 2023 05:39 PM (hyS0X)
Your Grace, may you continue to be blessed with your new life. I still remember your comments looking out at a parking lot, and wanting something better.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:39 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:39 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: Halfhand at December 26, 2023 05:39 PM (o5xaO)
Being a pretnetious asshammer to the point they have had enough of his shit the three times I checked....
JeffB making friends everywhere he goes.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:39 PM (X0I7i)
I think I came across a link for here from B5 or from Instapundit (I'd been following Insty since 9-11). It was a long, long time before I had the guts to actually comment in the little gray boxes though.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, anti-Marxist, buy ammo and keep your rifle by your side at December 26, 2023 05:40 PM (xcxpd)
Because it was listed above American Greatness, American Spectator and American Thinker, I thought it must be a sane source for news & political commentary. Never did I imagine years of entertainment featuring wit, humor, spontaneity, knowledge, and even occasional kindness. Thanks.
Posted by: L - They don't have to outrun the bear, they only need to outrun us - for now at December 26, 2023 05:40 PM (GshMh)
Carry on, Ace.
Posted by: Don Black at December 26, 2023 05:33 PM (geLO
So, are ya gonna tell us your old nic so we can recognize it?
Posted by: Emmie at December 26, 2023 05:40 PM (Sf2cq)
* Wistful sigh *
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:40 PM (u82oZ)
So I suppose I've been making boring comments for 2/3s of the blogs span. But it was a big sanity aid for me to find out that no I wasn't some weirdo for not finding Barky at all mesmerizing.
Posted by: PaleRider at December 26, 2023 05:41 PM (3cGpq)
Posted by: Truck Monkey Report at December 26, 2023 05:41 PM (ZV+pB)
Posted by: R2D2 at December 26, 2023 05:41 PM (JM96T)
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 05:41 PM (n+5ul)
A lot of the right is under constant bombardment morally in their workplace and have to be "socially acceptable."
I think Drew and Patterico are "kept right" but as lawyers I can understand why they have to be.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:41 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at December 26, 2023 05:41 PM (olroh)
Posted by: Tom Servo at December 26, 2023 05:42 PM (S6gqv)
And a tip of the hat to your stalwart husband.
His Cadillac CD is a sure-fire popular gift.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:42 PM (u82oZ)
It's been a long time lurking for me.
Congrats Ace. You are truly a national treasure.
Posted by: Bosk of Port Kar at December 26, 2023 05:42 PM (XMkZw)
-
Ahh. The great hipster slap fight post.
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here at December 26, 2023 05:42 PM (FVME7)
Posted by: Diogenes at December 26, 2023 05:42 PM (W/lyH)
Posted by: Don Black at December 26, 2023 05:42 PM (geLO8)
Glad you are here. I had left before the purge. Lost of good people were screwed over.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:43 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: No Shirt Shylock
It works if you take out the carriage return. Here's a simpler one:
https://is.gd/fD7ThG
Posted by: Brother Tim sez Max Headroom for President! at December 26, 2023 05:43 PM (OUMaO)
Your Grace, may you continue to be blessed with your new life. I still remember your comments looking out at a parking lot, and wanting something better.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:39 PM (u82oZ)
Thank you, {{{Salty}}}. Blessings upon you, too.
My life has changed since the times when I watched millennials trying to parallel park from my 4th story balcony.
There was a pool view, anyway...
Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at December 26, 2023 05:43 PM (Mzdiz)
Posted by: Marcus T at December 26, 2023 05:43 PM (XYrRT)
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 05:41 PM (n+5ul)
Nah, the autocorrect function would suggest "longbows" or "shelving" for everything.
Posted by: Dr. T at December 26, 2023 05:43 PM (jGGMD)
It's a lot like EMOS vs GOTHS no matter who wins our school dignity loses!
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:43 PM (X0I7i)
It's the boat. Which does make more sense.
Posted by: DaveA at December 26, 2023 05:43 PM (FhXTo)
Posted by: Don Black at December 26, 2023 05:44 PM (geLO8)
They've been always in a style
And they're guaranteed to raise a smile
So let me introduce to you
The site you've known all these years
Sgt. Ace's Lovely Morons Club Band
Posted by: Archer at December 26, 2023 05:44 PM (gmo/4)
Posted by: Formerly Arson Welles at December 26, 2023 05:44 PM (vxWW4)
Posted by: Emmie at December 26, 2023 05:40 PM (Sf2cq)
~~~~~
DB
Posted by: IrishEi at December 26, 2023 05:45 PM (OqZFJ)
Posted by: grammie winger - I don't belong here at December 26, 2023 05:45 PM (SfhV1)
I’ve been reading this blog for 18 years. It’s changed my life and outlook. The humor also is unmatched.
Posted by: Redenzo at December 26, 2023 05:45 PM (V/pbu)
I'm no Phlebologist, but when I saw the Georgia and Alabama cheer squads, I thought of the elbows.
But mostly, I had one thought., Just one thought.
Is her grandmother widowed?
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:45 PM (u82oZ)
His Cadillac CD is a sure-fire popular gift.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:42 PM (u82oZ)
{{{NaCly}}}
I will pass along your greetings to my husband. I'll give him a hug from you as well, if you'd like.
Posted by: Emmie at December 26, 2023 05:45 PM (Sf2cq)
This was probably around 2007 or 2008.
That sh*t was funny.
Posted by: Thomas Bender at December 26, 2023 05:38 PM (XV/Pl)
One of the funniest threads ever since I've been here was the infamous slap-fight video.
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at December 26, 2023 05:46 PM (BdMk6)
Posted by: Miley, okravangelist at December 26, 2023 05:46 PM (Mzdiz)
I can't believe this place is 20 years old.
Posted by: CaliGirl at December 26, 2023 05:46 PM (QuqX7)
Posted by: Truck Monkey Report at December 26, 2023 05:41 PM (ZV+pB)
Same
Posted by: grammie winger - I don't belong here at December 26, 2023 05:46 PM (SfhV1)
Bwahaha
Hey the 2d time I was banned I thanked the banner.
Not sarcastically and not manipulatively....my wife had just been rocketed the week prior and I was getting by on 14 hours sleep a week.
Getting banned here may have saved my life.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:46 PM (X0I7i)
In a funny way, you introduced me to Jordie Nelson. His entire clan is absolutely thriving.
We have a good donut place in Aggieville, if you send the Rev out for more bread. We could pal around if he makes it here.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:47 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea, Radioactive Knight at December 26, 2023 05:47 PM (ScR16)
my fav piece is still linked on the main page- Michael Moore Manhattan Death Spree or something
Posted by: Don Black at December 26, 2023 05:47 PM (geLO8)
Hipster Slapfight
We hardly even got going and then...gone.
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2023 05:47 PM (n+5ul)
I wanted to use my group duties as keeping the 3 solvent stills water and oxygen free for a NEH grant called - Still Life -. My boss was not amused.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:38 PM (u82oZ)
I can't exactly say I'm thankful for being employed at a community college, but there is a distinct lack of the "publish or perish" mentality. I don't know how the folks at an R1 institution stay sane...oh wait, they don't.
Posted by: Dr. T at December 26, 2023 05:47 PM (jGGMD)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:47 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 26, 2023 05:47 PM (di6C2)
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:47 PM (u82oZ)
Aw geez that'd be fun!
Posted by: grammie winger - I don't belong here at December 26, 2023 05:48 PM (SfhV1)
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:48 PM (tT6L1)
Posted by: grammie winger - I don't belong here at December 26, 2023 05:46 PM (SfhV1)
Me too. You were Mama Winger back then, too, IIRC.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 26, 2023 05:48 PM (tkR6S)
Posted by: grammie winger - I don't belong here at December 26, 2023 05:48 PM (SfhV1)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 05:48 PM (FQmDC)
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here at December 26, 2023 05:49 PM (FVME7)
Posted by: Formerly Arson Welles at December 26, 2023 05:44 PM (vxWW4)
Well... about that...
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 26, 2023 05:49 PM (di6C2)
Sure. Go hug him. But I aver your hugs are more therapeutics than his. Well to me, at least.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:49 PM (u82oZ)
But mostly, I had one thought., Just one thought.
Is her grandmother widowed?
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:45 PM (u82oZ)
***
I always have an excuse to visit campus at the University where I don't teach any more, except for when I need beer money, during Mom's Weekend. Several moms have mad it...worthwhile. And a few granny's too.
Posted by: Diogenes at December 26, 2023 05:49 PM (W/lyH)
Posted by: Don Black at December 26, 2023 05:44 PM (geLO
I almost got banned on one occasion for unwittingly blowing out the margins. However, ace forgave me, probably because of my DeSantis support.
Posted by: Dr. T at December 26, 2023 05:50 PM (jGGMD)
Posted by: Don Black at December 26, 2023 05:50 PM (geLO8)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:50 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 05:50 PM (FQmDC)
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:50 PM (tT6L1)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 05:50 PM (x42Y3)
When I turned 29 and the grands started popping out.
Posted by: grammie winger - I don't belong here at December 26, 2023 05:51 PM (SfhV1)
Thanks for doing what you do, Ace. This place has often saved me.
Posted by: Marcus T at December 26, 2023 05:51 PM (XYrRT)
http://ace-o-spades.blogspot.com/ 2004_01_01_ace-o-spades_archive.html?m=1# 107342255738179485
Dunno if it'll let me post.
It didn't.
Remove spaces. I'm on my phone and Tiny dosn't work.
Posted by: Reforger at December 26, 2023 05:51 PM (peekw)
I miss you, I would like to thank you and the 'ettes for helping keep me anchored back in the 2008-2011 era...
my wife was deployed more than 1/2 the time and the horde kept me grounded enough to do my work and take care of our son.
In my darkest hours I wanted to abandon my world and just vanish from fear.
Caring about the gang back then let me see through the hard work we faced.
Thanks again.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:51 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: DenverGregg at December 26, 2023 05:51 PM (ccqW3)
Posted by: grammie winger - I don't belong here at December 26, 2023 05:51 PM (SfhV1)
Posted by: Ben Had at December 26, 2023 05:52 PM (PKEqY)
Long Cat on ONT
Posted by: Skip at December 26, 2023 05:52 PM (fwDg9)
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 26, 2023 05:48 PM (tkR6S)
~~~~~
Yep. I remember Mama Winger from L/G/F too.
Posted by: IrishEi at December 26, 2023 05:52 PM (OqZFJ)
That was before the fate of the Clinton Cartel presented itself.
Posted by: Dr. Bone at December 26, 2023 05:52 PM (J3ryZ)
I’ve been reading this blog for 18 years. It’s changed my life and outlook. The humor also is unmatched.
Posted by: Claudine Gay at December 26, 2023 05:52 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: Blake - semi lurker at large at December 26, 2023 05:53 PM (tT6L1)
Posted by: Skip at December 26, 2023 05:53 PM (fwDg9)
Thank you for that update on Jane D'Oh. She has been through so much! I will worry less now.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:54 PM (u82oZ)
As far as this post, guess that case of Trump envy/hate goes back a long time.
Posted by: Teej at December 26, 2023 05:54 PM (spJU8)
Posted by: IrishEi at December 26, 2023 05:54 PM (OqZFJ)
Posted by: DenverGregg at December 26, 2023 05:51 PM (ccqW3)
I still remember the "loaf of ungrateful bread" post Ace made about Gabe Malor. I was reading it on a computer in the university library and crying from the effort to stifle my laughter.
Posted by: Dr. T at December 26, 2023 05:54 PM (jGGMD)
Posted by: Marcus T at December 26, 2023 05:54 PM (XYrRT)
Posted by: Minuteman at December 26, 2023 05:54 PM (LaNzR)
read for well over a decade. Ace you've had
me laughing in tears and seething with rage.
Thanks for your voice of clarity in turbulent
times. Also, your BS detector has no
equal.
Posted by: Official Lurker TM at December 26, 2023 05:54 PM (vgBPF)
Posted by: Don Black at December 26, 2023 05:55 PM (geLO8)
Google exec, "what happened?"
Google IT wanker, "We fed the AI every post of some obscure smart military blog called Ace of Spades."
Posted by: Anna Puma at December 26, 2023 05:55 PM (HFJUU)
Rum....
BBBD
The whole ONT gang.
It was a different world we lived in then.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:55 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 26, 2023 05:56 PM (di6C2)
Posted by: troyriser at December 26, 2023 05:56 PM (7Cx1V)
>>Because this is starting to sound like a tribute thread. 😐
** Holds up lighter, and waves it from side to side.
Posted by: Thomas Bender at December 26, 2023 05:57 PM (XV/Pl)
Posted by: Archer at December 26, 2023 05:57 PM (gmo/4)
>>Because this is starting to sound like a tribute thread. 😐
** Holds up lighter, and waves it from side to side.
Posted by: Thomas Bender at December 26, 2023 05:57 PM (XV/Pl)
*yells*
Anka!!!
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 26, 2023 05:57 PM (di6C2)
He wanted the commentariat...
Like I said to my son when he was mocking Benny Shapiro the other day....
"Son I mocked Benny when you were 6." (He is 24)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:57 PM (X0I7i)
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
http://tinyurl.com/mzrt52te
2:19 minutes
8.5k ReTruths 27.3k Likes
Dec 25, 2023, 12:13 AM [Presidential speeches compilation]
"For Christians this is a very holy season..."
====
Christmas card photo:
http://tinyurl.com/bdh4jxux
Posted by: andycanuck (2yu8s) at December 26, 2023 05:58 PM (2yu8s)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 05:58 PM (FQmDC)
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 05:58 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: Anna Puma at December 26, 2023 05:58 PM (HFJUU)
Posted by: Archer at December 26, 2023 05:57 PM (gmo/4)
No shit. EVERYONE had a blog roll. TONS of blogs. Hell I think there were dead links to blogs on drudge even then.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 26, 2023 05:58 PM (di6C2)
Posted by: Thomas Bender at December 26, 2023 05:57 PM (XV/Pl)
FREEBIRD!!!
Posted by: Archer at December 26, 2023 05:58 PM (gmo/4)
Only one has survived.
Posted by: Reforger at December 26, 2023 05:58 PM (peekw)
What is this? Rocky Horror?
Posted by: Anna Puma at December 26, 2023 05:58 PM (HFJUU)
3.2% less gay.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 26, 2023 05:59 PM (di6C2)
Posted by: Dr. T at December 26, 2023 05:50 PM (jGGMD)
I got banned for slashing through the envelope and tap-dancing on the other side. I deserved it.
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at December 26, 2023 05:59 PM (BdMk6)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 05:59 PM (FQmDC)
there was a Cambrian Explosion of blogs back then, many of which went extinct
this one survives
thanks for never getting a real job, Ace
Posted by: Don Black at December 26, 2023 05:59 PM (geLO8)
>>What is this? Rocky Horror?
** Rifles through bag... roll of toilet paper, pack of frankfurters, umbrella...
Yep, got everything.
Posted by: Thomas Bender at December 26, 2023 05:59 PM (XV/Pl)
I don't remember how I got here.
Probably from somewhere I shouldn't have been at from work.
Posted by: DaveA at December 26, 2023 06:00 PM (FhXTo)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 06:00 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 05:59 PM (FQmDC)
That car may not have been what it was made out to be, but it was cool.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 26, 2023 06:00 PM (di6C2)
Posted by: Marcus T at December 26, 2023 06:00 PM (XYrRT)
** Throws rice and artisanal toast at you. **
I'm going to reread Golden Isis this winter. The book is in one of my bookshelves, protected.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 06:00 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: mrp at December 26, 2023 06:00 PM (rj6Yv)
thank you Ace, cob-loggers, Horde, no better folks anywhere!
Posted by: sock_rat_eez - these lying bastardi e stronzi have been lying for decades at December 26, 2023 06:01 PM (kc18b)
Posted by: steevy at December 26, 2023 06:01 PM (FQmDC)
Thanks for doing what you do, Ace. This place has often saved me.
Posted by: Marcus T at December 26, 2023 05:51 PM (XYrRT)
+++++
Very well said.
Posted by: washrivergal at December 26, 2023 06:02 PM (CmpAD)
http://annapuna.blogspot.com/
Posted by: Anna Puma at December 26, 2023 06:02 PM (HFJUU)
“And I will make justice the line, and righteousness the plumb line; and hail will sweep away the refuge of lies, and waters will overwhelm the shelter.”
Guy had a sense of style and I liked his posts as well. Comments were not as brutal or as quick as here, but were lively.
Posted by: Aetius451AD at December 26, 2023 06:02 PM (di6C2)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 06:02 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Northernlurker at December 26, 2023 06:02 PM (x42Y3)
Posted by: Anna Puma at December 26, 2023 06:03 PM (HFJUU)
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 26, 2023 06:04 PM (tkR6S)
Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at December 26, 2023 06:04 PM (66s2O)
Do you need a Go Fund me effort.
I remember with sadness your travail after her death.
But the trip to the Philippines and that local, tall, bar-maid seemed to help.
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 06:05 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 06:00 PM (X0I7i)
I often wonder what happened to Rusty and Darth Odie and everyone else.
Posted by: Reforger at December 26, 2023 06:05 PM (peekw)
Posted by: Marcus T at December 26, 2023 06:05 PM (XYrRT)
Posted by: Anna Puma at December 26, 2023 06:06 PM (HFJUU)
Posted by: banana Dream at December 26, 2023 06:07 PM (yn1eg)
I got banned at LGF post Katrina and was at GPC for a while before here. Can't really recall how long though. A fella can get addicted.
Posted by: Javems at December 26, 2023 06:09 PM (8I4hW)
AK went through job change and, I think maybe, ph# change.
My ph same-same but email change since.
Posted by: Teej at December 26, 2023 06:09 PM (spJU8)
Wall of shame indeed, if they programmed AI with my ONT posts for an 8 year gap it would be banned by international treaty.
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 06:10 PM (X0I7i)
Posted by: Ciampino - What a Birthday Ace at December 26, 2023 06:12 PM (qfLjt)
==
Me too..different nicks over the years.
Lot of water under the bridge.
Posted by: Simplemind at December 26, 2023 06:12 PM (hU6In)
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 26, 2023 06:13 PM (u82oZ)
Posted by: NR Pax at December 26, 2023 06:15 PM (5+9sG)
Posted by: sock_rat_eez - these lying bastardi e stronzi have been lying for decades at December 26, 2023 06:18 PM (kc18b)
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Posted by: TexasDan at December 26, 2023 06:24 PM (X7yt5)
Posted by: sven at December 26, 2023 05:16 PM (X0I7i)
Mega-dittos.
Posted by: lurk at December 26, 2023 06:28 PM (Cq8oj)
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Posted by: Farad3000 at December 26, 2023 07:32 PM (scHBT)
Posted by: Chairman LMAO, Bird Law Expert at December 26, 2023 07:38 PM (F5SKq)
Posted by: BeckoningChasm at December 26, 2023 08:12 PM (CHHv1)
Posted by: Jane at December 26, 2023 09:47 PM (EcD5Y)
Posted by: Lothar of the Keolu Hill People at December 27, 2023 12:54 AM (Gx2Uf)
We owe you the world for saving our sanity by bringing so many together who share the same outlook on the insane world around us.
Been with you since the beginning, from LGF or Insty or Hot Air when Michelle ran the place.
Have rarely missed a day, even though usually as a night owl, from the Left Coast, so I’m always way behind everyone and usually a thread killer!
Posted by: Jimmy Doolittle at December 27, 2023 01:47 AM (U8Hxf)
I'm having some minor security issues with my latest sіte and I'd like to find
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Posted by: mater at December 30, 2023 04:55 PM (4B3oa)
setup? I'm assuming having a blog like yours would cost a pretty
penny? I'm not very ingernet savvy so I'm not 100% certain. Any tips or advice would be greaatly
appreciated. Thank you
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Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement
Integrity SAT's: Entrance Exam for Paul Anka's Band
AllahPundit's Paul Anka 45's Collection
AnkaPundit: Paul Anka Takes Over the Site for a Weekend (Continues through to Monday's postings)
George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an F*ckin' Hammer
Democratic Forays into Erotica
New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network
Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really Hate Potatoes
Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse
Signs You're at an Iraqi "Wedding Party"
Signs Your Clown Has Gone Bad
Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up
Signs of Hip-Hop Influence on John Kerry
NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom
Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?"
Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind
All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd
Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran
Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore
Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery
Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile
Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance
Collective Names for Groups of People
John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets
Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle
Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy
Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive"
Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments
John Edwards Campaign Excuses
John Kerry Pick-Up Lines
Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney
Torments in Dog-Hell
The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)