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Colorado Trail-Runner Attacked From Behind by Mountain Lion;
Kills It With His Bare Hands, Strangling It

The story's been out since February 4, but the guy finally sat down for a interview and told his story.

Audio at the link. Here's some of the story.

He's officially 0% soy.


The 31-year-old -- at 5 feet, 10 inches tall and 150 pounds -- skipped the earbuds on this run, opting instead for the sound of his own footsteps. A quarter-mile into his descent from Towers, he heard pine needles rustling on the trail behind him.

"I stopped and turned," he said. "And it's one of those situations where sometimes I turn, sometimes I don't. But in the back of my mind I always wonder if it's something dangerous like a bear or a bobcat or a mountain lion, and in this case it was in fact a mountain lion.

"So I remember seeing that and just having my gut feel the full impact of the situation."

The approximately 80-pound juvenile cougar barreled toward him. Kauffman put up his arms and screamed in an attempt to scare the cat away.

"Unfortunately, it kept running," he said.

The cat leapt at Kauffman's face. He raised his arms in a defensive motion to blunt the initial attack. Its mouth locked around his wrist. One tooth sunk into the meaty part of his thumb, another dug into the top of his wrist.

The mountain lion hugged Kauffman's body, digging its front claws into his back. Its back legs thrashed at his thighs. He tried to throw it off. But with its mouth clamped around his wrist, the two ended up tumbling more than 20 feet off the trail into a gully.

"But during that fall, the cat ended up on its back and it still had my wrist this whole time in its mouth," Kauffman said.

With the leverage of being on top of the cougar, Kauffman used one of his legs to pin the animal's hindquarters to the ground, and then searched for a way to fight back. He grabbed sticks, but they were rotted, and crumbled when he tried to use them against the cat. With his free hand, he found a rock and began hitting its head. The angle was awkward and Kauffman let the cat's legs slip out from under him.

...

He was able to repin the mountain lion's legs with his left leg and swung the other around to the cat's throat.

"I got my right foot onto its neck," he said. "And then I was able to get some weight onto its windpipe and that's what eventually suffocated it."

Only when the cat was dead did it release Kauffman's wrist from its mouth.

The whole battle lasted about ten minutes.

There's a little more to this story, as a Twitter source reports:



Posted by: Ace of Spades at 02:02 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Badass

Posted by: Golfman at February 15, 2019 01:58 PM (aEyji)

2 Pish posh. I kill mountain lions for fun.

Posted by: Ruthie B at February 15, 2019 01:58 PM (Ttdys)

3 It's dead Jim

Posted by: Bones McCoy at February 15, 2019 01:58 PM (idlY2)

4 LOL at the tweet

Posted by: votermom pimping NEW Moron-authored books! at February 15, 2019 01:58 PM (BJlbN)

5 Stone bad ass, I'd say.

Posted by: Redenzo at February 15, 2019 01:58 PM (14qvS)

6 He was wearing a red MAGA hat! It was horrible!

Posted by: Zombie Cougar at February 15, 2019 01:59 PM (RD7QR)

7 Whoa.

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, Texas at February 15, 2019 01:59 PM (uDcBt)

8 If only this were a metaphor for Trump's dealings with the Republican Senate.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at February 15, 2019 01:59 PM (yQpMk)

9 Very large stones.

Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 01:59 PM (/tuJf)

10 BertG tried killing the margins with his bare hands.

He lost.

Posted by: Walter Freeman at February 15, 2019 01:59 PM (I/iGu)

11 A search of the mountain lion's den revealed a red hat, bleach, and some magazines next to a pair of scissors.

Posted by: Broseidon - New Work Computer, Same Work Ethic at February 15, 2019 01:59 PM (oZ6kz)

12 Toxic masculinity people!

Posted by: Max Power at February 15, 2019 01:59 PM (q177U)

13 Hear that? That's the sound of thousands of women suddenly and simultaneously ovulating.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 15, 2019 02:00 PM (NWiLs)

14 Did the lion scream "MAGA!"?

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at February 15, 2019 02:00 PM (oVJmc)

15 But I mean seriously
No Go Pro.
/disgust

Posted by: Total Control Racist at February 15, 2019 02:00 PM (idlY2)

16
Colorado Trail-Runner Attacked From Behind by Mountain Lion;Kills It With His Bare Hands, Strangling It


Toxic masculinity

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at February 15, 2019 02:00 PM (TAmPV)

17 Evidently I wasn't the only person who thought "RBG" when seeing this headline.

It's why I love this place.

Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (NYS7S)

18 Lions often carry bleach. Gotta watch out for those in particular.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, it's cofefve time at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (Z216Q)

19 Shit.

I promise I will read the comment before smart-assing, in a complete break from AoSHQ Policy.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (oVJmc)

20 Maybe it's a bad idea to go jogging by yourself in places that are known to have mountain lions unless you have some kind of weapon with you?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (AllCR)

21 Seriously though, I would have gone into a fetal ball if a mountain lion had attacked me. And probably would have bled to death. So I tip my cap to this guy's toxic masculinity.

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (RD7QR)

22 Holy shit.

Wow.

Posted by: Deplorable Ian Galt at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (8iiMU)

23
Millenials be like:

Oh... killed a COUGAR..... like the mountain lion. I get it now.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (vIjh1)

24 That is some primal stuff right there.

Posted by: Akex #11 at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (VSIhW)

25 Nigerians have been known to take out fully-grown lions.

Posted by: Jussie N. Casey at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (m6qV1)

26 Wake me when he's ready to meet in the octagon.

Posted by: Ruthie B at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (Ttdys)

27 Enunciate and project!

Posted by: 80's music fan at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (tQkRb)

28 Moral of the story: Don't get involved with cougars.

Posted by: SteveOReno, I proudly self-identify as a Moron at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (2sCft)

29 Lion was wearing a MAGA hat - tried to pour bleach on him.

Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (37IEG)

30 Freaking Mike Emmanel and Dana Perino don't have a brain between them. They have zero understanding of how national emergencies work under 50 U.S.C. 1621, 1622 and the fact that Congress can overturn that reprogramming if both the House and Senate pass resolutions. The Senate won't so they're dissembling into the tyrant and precedent lies. Pure willful ignorance and very frustrating to watch. Fox should be embarrassed.

Posted by: Maccus T at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (VpIIl)

31 I think Kauffman is the one that at the end raised his hands to the sky and yelled "MAGA!"
Or "Crom!"
Pretty much the same thing.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Get Twitter - The Electronic Valu-Rite at The Outrage Outlet and Reduce Your IQ and Soul at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (hLRSq)

32 Scottsdale cougars are not to be messed with.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (DMUuz)

33 off, foul sock!

Posted by: OregonMuse. AoSHQ Thought Leader & Pants Monitor at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (aGFaW)

34 Toxic masculinity people!

Well, he was toxic to the mountain lion.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (AllCR)

35 The deadliest animal on the planet, by far: humans.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (u82oZ)

36 He suffocated it with his foot?

Dude.

Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude.

I'll, er, brb.

Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (GbPPJ)

37 But was it an assault mountain lion, with the downward facing thing?

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (xfb67)

38 What? I couldn't hear you over the clanging sound of this guy's enormous brass balls.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (p+Wdc)

39
ack

Posted by: Bill the Montain Lion at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (dJtVf)

40 But was it an assault mountain lion, with the downward facing thing?


A pecker?

Posted by: Grump928(C) at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (yQpMk)

41 I punched out a horse.

Posted by: Mongo at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (aKsyK)

42 ya but did the lion call him the 'N'-word?

Posted by: Retard Strength Trumps Smart Power at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (RKQ/v)

43 I call that "Tuesday".

Posted by: Dick Cheney at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (wCmLp)

44 Hear that? That's the sound of thousands of women suddenly and simultaneously ovulating. Posted by: Insomniac at February 15, 2019 02:00 PM (NWiLs)


Well, killing a mountain lion with your bare hands is sexy.

Posted by: G. Gnome, GNOMCO Home Defense System and Turkey Fryer Salesman at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (al6UK)

45 I heard he had bleach with him, but he forgot the noose

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (39g3+)

46 37
But was it an assault mountain lion, with the downward facing thing?

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (xfb67)
Had a magazine full of calibers too!

Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (37IEG)

47 Maybe it's a bad idea to go jogging by yourself in places that are known to have mountain lions unless you have some kind of weapon with you?
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM (AllCR)

------

In Missouri it used to be expressly forbidden to carry a firearm during archery deer season, even if you are a concealed carry permit holder.

On more than one walk to the stand in the morning.... it occurred to me all I have are essentially pointy sticks if a cougar shows up.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (vIjh1)

48
Unfortunately the cat was an undocumented juvenile migrant from Mexico and the guy is now facing the death penalty...

Posted by: In Vino Veritits at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (UFLLM)

49 My son has a buddy who participates in a running league of sorts in Colorado. They run trail races at very high elevations. During the summer people fly in from all over the country to participate. I wonder how many of those guys are prepared to fight off hungry lions during their runs?

Posted by: Huck Follywood, it's cofefve time at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (Z216Q)

50 So did the cat throw bleach on him, and put a noose around his neck?

Posted by: Tom Servo at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (Kpl3J)

51 Props.

Lessons there, die trying and you may not die.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (bcbK8)

52 Pffff. Did he use it as a condom?

Posted by: Dick Cheney at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (oVJmc)

53 Maybe it's a bad idea to go jogging by yourself in places that are known to have mountain lions unless you have some kind of weapon with you?

***

He was asking for It! Going out dressed like that!

Posted by: Mountain lion at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (idlY2)

54 36 He suffocated it with his foot?

Dude.

Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude.

I'll, er, brb.
Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (GbPPJ)

Did the lights just dim?

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (RD7QR)

55 40 But was it an assault mountain lion, with the downward facing thing?


A pecker?
Posted by: Grump928(C) at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (yQpMk)

--------

A chainsaw attachment?

Posted by: 29Victor at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (BJKQV)

56 It was a juvenile cougar, so, what, a 27 year old hawt female?

Posted by: anchorbabe fashion cop at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (8iiMU)

57 So he actually choked it to death. I assumed he held its mouth shut and covered the nostrils, which is how I would do it.

bold move to try to choke an animal who may have a super thick neck.

Posted by: Wizards! At the bottom of it all! at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (9AcAx)

58 In New York, he could have just said he aborted the juvenile beast

Posted by: Roman Maroni at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (vCA4F)

59 It's always the juvenile male lions that attack. Well, the vast majority of the time, anyway. The older ones know to avoid the humans. Cats that don't figure that out end up dead sooner than later.

But when they're out for their first couple of years on their own they can be cocky.

And that's a good thing, because adult males are much bigger than this one. Like, twice as big. And if they're in a salubrious area (say Hilldale Pines, CO, for instance) the adult males can and do get up over 200lbs. You have no chance if that fucker attacks.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (AzW6q)

60 Yikes, 10 minutes is a long time to be struggling against a wild animal.

Posted by: Lizzy at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (W+vEI)

61 50 So did the cat throw bleach on him, and put a noose around his neck?
Posted by: Tom Servo at February 15, 2019 02:03 PM (Kpl3J)

I think he pointed things out and DESTROYED him with FACTS and LOGIC.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (bcbK8)

62 #MountainLionsLivesMatter

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (Cd7oE)

63 I promise I will read the comment before smart-assing, in a complete break from AoSHQ Policy.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at February 15, 2019 02:01 PM


Don't do it! This business will get out of control! It will get out of control and we'll be lucky to live through it!

Posted by: Adm. Painter at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (DMUuz)

64 We are assuming the Mountain Lion identifies as such.

Maybe it felt like a groundhog.

Posted by: ILikeMyMenMachoandStrongand FullOfToxicTestosterone at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (J9wxX)

65 bold move to try to choke an animal who may have a super thick neck.
Posted by: Wizards! At the bottom of it all! at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (9AcAx)

--------

He pinned the cat's throat with his foot.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (AzW6q)

66 Twitter Locks Account Of Journalist Who Asked Why Ocasio-Cortez's Boyfriend Is Listed As 'Staff' With House Email

Posted by: SMOD at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (QkjLD)

67 JFC - 10 minutes?!

Posted by: Dark Helmet at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (PafRH)

68 Pretty bold,. but if it was me, every photo would have to be me stretched out like George Costanza on my new cat skinned rug.

Posted by: Gentlemen, this is democracy manifest at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (LWu6U)

69 This guy should go jogging in Congress.


Posted by: LeftCoast Dawg at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (sy5kK)

70
How dare he kill a magnificent creature of the forest. Why, he should have donated his flesh to the wild animal and to Gaia in general.

Posted by: Sphynx at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (rXie1)

71 Ban trail jogging in wildlife habitats. Running or jogging sets off every predatory instinct these animals have. Common freaking sense.

Posted by: Maccus T at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (VpIIl)

72 seriously this is why you need some kind of thingy that will work as a weapon of you insist on traipsing around deserted areas by yourself

Posted by: votermom pimping NEW Moron-authored books! at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (BJlbN)

73
Sam Midkiff
@TomTraversIII
Replying to
@toddschnitt
and
@JoeSilverman7
A real MAGA cat wouldn't just attack. It would pounce.

-----

Heh.

Posted by: 29Victor at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (BJKQV)

74 Back in the 90s there was a surge of mountain lion activity/intrusion into populated areas in SoCal. Biologists could not explain it.


One poor woman did a very dumb thing, went running on a remote mountain trail in east San Diego County - at dawn. !!!!! She got kilt.


There were a few other attacks. Amazingly, a proposition was put on the state ballot to reauthorize regulated (issuance of a very few annual licenses) hunting of mountain lions. It was defeated. (at the time, don't know about today, CA had 2-3 bounty hunters on contract to intervene in cases of troublesome/dangerous cats, otherwise hunting was forbidden)


And there was a fatal attack on a mountain biker up in Orange County, I think, at dusk, and some non-fatal incidents also, in the same general area (county park, visible from the I-5/405 interchange (the "Orange Crush").


Just some boring CA mountain lion trivia.

Posted by: rhomboid at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (QDnY+)

75 I wonder if he gets to keep the pelt.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (xfb67)

76

Thankfully it was just a yearling, less than 100 pounds. Still, nearly 100 POUNDS!!?!?!

Posted by: imp at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (w+Z9D)

77 54 36 He suffocated it with his foot?

Dude.

Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude.

I'll, er, brb.
Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (GbPPJ)

Did the lights just dim?
Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM (RD7QR)

The entire southeastern United States is now experiencing a brownout.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (NWiLs)

78 Well, *I'm* turned on.

I was over at Ask a Manager yesterday, and someone had written in saying her workplace was in a really unsafe area and she wanted tips for her ten-minute walk to the bus stop. (I was pretty sure that "buy a gun, learn how to use it" would not be a welcome suggestion, so I didn't make it.) She also mentioned that her husband could drop her off and pick her up to save her the walk if she adjusted her working hours a bit. That comment started a thread of people up in arms because "Your husband is NOT your bodyguard!!!!!" And I just thought, that is sad. Yes, my husband damn well IS my protector. That's part of his job.

Posted by: Mrs. Peel at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (rWZ8Y)

79
The lion must have identified as Chihuahua.

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at February 15, 2019 02:06 PM (TAmPV)

80 Jim Acosta Asks Trump If He Is 'Manufacturing A Crisis' At The Border. Trump Simply Tells The Angel Moms To Stand Up

Posted by: SMOD at February 15, 2019 02:06 PM (QkjLD)

81 Jussie's character family name in Empire is Lyon.

I feel like some of you are missing obvious puns here.

Posted by: Walter Freeman at February 15, 2019 02:06 PM (I/iGu)

82 67 JFC - 10 minutes?!
Posted by: Dark Helmet at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (PafRH)


Probably just seemed like ten minutes. I doubt it literally was ten minutes.

Not a criticism, just an observation.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:06 PM (Cd7oE)

83 I like this guy! Let's get him on our team.

Posted by: Lord Humongus at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (QLvwG)

84 It sucks carrying anything extra while jogging but at least an air horn or pepper spray would have been wise.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (39g3+)

85 In Colorado, pussy eats you.

Posted by: Yakov Smirnov at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (knKQ1)

86 I wonder if he gets to keep the pelt.
Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (xfb67)



I'm sure he'll have no trouble finding any pelt if he wants it.

Posted by: Dick Cheney at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (wCmLp)

87 Ban trail jogging in wildlife habitats.

----------

All of Colorado above about 6000' is a lion habitat.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (AzW6q)

88 my local news reported this, but they never said the guy killed it.

weird.

Posted by: trapper's girl at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (VzI4f)

89 FVCK me, I could've sold tickets!

Posted by: Commodus at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (NWiLs)

90
The entire southeastern United States is now experiencing a brownout.
Posted by: Insomniac at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (NWiLs)



This is probable.

Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (GbPPJ)

91 You stand up to large cats and black bears, fetal position for Grizzlies, and kiss yo ass goodbye for polar bears. Jury out on Bigfoot

Assuming you are not heavily armed which I always am through experience.

Posted by: Embarrassing Stain at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (7C1eL)

92 don't fuck with the cougars.

you make love to them

Posted by: nurse ratched at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (d7Ww2)

93 71 Ban trail jogging in wildlife habitats. Running or jogging sets off every predatory instinct these animals have. Common freaking sense.
Posted by: Maccus T at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (VpIIl)

Nah. Let them run and post signs about the risk.

Nature wants to kill you. Folks need to be reminded of that fact.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (bcbK8)

94 PETA: "You'll be hearing from our lawyers! Murderer!"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (Cd7oE)

95 FIRST!!!!!

Posted by: Sponge at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (IXZGh)

96 Fuck Nature! That shit needs to die.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (0ogxh)

97 The Colorado jogger who was attacked by the mountain lion said the cat yelled, "this is #MAGA country."

That shit's funny right there.....

Posted by: Sponge at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (IXZGh)

98 92 don't fuck with the cougars.

you make love to them
Posted by: nurse ratched at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (d7Ww2)

Depends on if she's been drinking or not.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (bcbK8)

99 Related.
Man kills attacking wolf with knife, axe, and big giant balls.

https://tinyurl.com/y5jyaw2s

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (t6MX/)

100 Re: shouldn't be jogging where there are mountain lions - That is life in Colorado, and it's not just mountain lions. The dog park I used almost every day, that was 1 block from my home, had it's own resident coyote pack. It was multi-use park next to a golf course, and it contained 5 soccer fields as well as the dog park with open meadows dividing them.


You have to be on guard and have a plan.

Posted by: Lizzy at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (W+vEI)

101 Man Shot To Extreme Death At Naval Air Station-Corpus Christi After Crashing Stolen SUV Into Gate, Engaging Security In Firefight

Posted by: SMOD at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (QkjLD)

102 91
You stand up to large cats and black bears, fetal position for
Grizzlies, and kiss yo ass goodbye for polar bears. Jury out on Bigfoot



Assuming you are not heavily armed which I always am through experience.

Posted by: Embarrassing Stain at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (7C1eL)


Irrumatio Bigfoot.

Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (37IEG)

103 MAGA tweet is funny.


I thought I saw a story today that said it was a 40 lb. lion, not 80. Not to say that killing one barehanded isn't badass, but there's a difference.

Now, mountain lion, cougar, puma, catamount? Fight!

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (fuK7c)

104 >>He suffocated it with his foot?

Pfft. John Wick killed a guy with a pencil.

A pencil!

Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (/tuJf)

105 Told dad he wasn't the cat's meow

Posted by: Mountain lions big brother at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (RZ6R1)

106 Bad kitteh!

Posted by: DaveA at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (FhXTo)

107 Nature wants to kill you. Folks need to be reminded of that fact.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (bcbK


Man is SUPPOSED to be top of the food chain. This is the reminder that the battle for supremacy rages on.

Posted by: Sponge at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (IXZGh)

108
Jussie's character family name in Empire is Lyon.

I feel like some of you are missing obvious puns here.

Posted by: Walter Freeman at February 15, 2019 02:06 PM (I/iGu)


Perfect. Meanwhile, the cat's den has been discovered.

Yep. MAGA hat inside.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (ptqGC)

109 Yikes, 10 minutes is a long time to be struggling against a wild animal.
Posted by: Lizzy at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM



Tell me about it, sister.

Posted by: Huma at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (786Ro)

110 Tough to get a cat to commit to anything for ten minutes, unless its sleep. Even when they fight each other its mostly staring at each other growling

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (39g3+)

111 Don't think cats cant be dangerous? Reminds me of this poor guy.

https://youtu.be/Ebdpw-qGG4E

Posted by: Golfman at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (aEyji)

112 I hope he got to keep the pelt. I know I would have that thing stuffed and mounted after that ordeal.

"Oh that stuffed mountain lion? That's my Man Card."

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Get Twitter - The Electronic Valu-Rite at The Outrage Outlet and Reduce Your IQ and Soul at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (hLRSq)

113 Gillibrand supports removing existing barriers.

Posted by: Ha at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (MAstk)

114 Nature wants to kill you. Folks need to be reminded of that fact.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (bcbK


Yep. People - OK, dull-witted people - suffer from Fluffy Bunny Syndrome after watching too many Disney movies.

My favorite story: the woman who smeared honey on her kid's face in Yellowstone (IIRC) to get a photo of a bear licking the honey off.

Darwin was wrong.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (Cd7oE)

115 Man isn't on the top of the food chain.

Man with gun is on the top of the food chain.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (xfb67)

116 911 Call Reports Bear Hanging From Trash Truck Driving On NC Highway

Posted by: SMOD at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (QkjLD)

117 This reminds me of my own fight for survival.

Posted by: Michelle Fields at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (Ttdys)

118 Fake news!! He used a shod foot to choke the cat, not his bare hands!

Posted by: No One of Consequence at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (8g9zh)

119 *ponders how to get Beto to jog in lion territory*

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (ptqGC)

120 Hunting of mountain lions makes perfect sense. If you run or hike a defensive handgun is a must.

Posted by: USNtakim profoundly deplorable. at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (0OmEj)

121 101 Man Shot To Extreme Death At Naval Air Station-Corpus Christi After Crashing Stolen SUV Into Gate, Engaging Security In Firefight
Posted by: SMOD at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (QkjLD)

Good. Nice to have a happy ending.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (bcbK8)

122 Would you believe, I first saw this on Facebook the other day, and there were a ton of sad and angry emojis underneath from people upset that he had killed the poor kitty.

Actually yes--I'm sure you would believe that.

Posted by: Dr. T at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (PXKj8)

123 don't fuck with the cougars.

you make love to them
Posted by: nurse ratched at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (d7Ww2)

-----

Ummmm..... I think its great you and Insom meet up here.


But..... the rest rest of us can hear everything you two say.....

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (vIjh1)

124 101 Man Shot To Extreme Death At Naval Air Station-Corpus Christi After Crashing Stolen SUV Into Gate, Engaging Security In Firefight

So basically he was killed by blunt trauma caused by the impact of the SUV into the gate and the rain of fast-moving projectiles into what was left of his body - but mostly the rain of fast moving projectiles. Right?

Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (NYS7S)

125 Damn. 10 minutes?
I wonder if the fight really lasted that long, or if it just felt that way. Adrenaline really screws up your sense of time...

Posted by: Tex Lovera at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (wtvvX)

126 Cougars 2, Humans 1

I believe two people have recently been killed by cougars. I suspect this will be the exception.

Posted by: Maccus T at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (VpIIl)

127 This happens all the time!

Posted by: Red Dead Redemption at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (QLvwG)

128 119
*ponders how to get Beto to jog in lion territory*


Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (ptqGC)
I'll volunteer to help build the skateboard course for him.

Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (37IEG)

129 Now, mountain lion, cougar, puma, catamount? Fight!
Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (fuK7c)



Late term mountain lion

Posted by: Coonman at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (RZ6R1)

130 120 Hunting of mountain lions makes perfect sense. If you run or hike a defensive handgun is a must.
Posted by: USNtakim profoundly deplorable. at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (0OmEj)

Jah. Laws or not, your life is in YOUR hands.

Travel Strapped.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (bcbK8)

131 Now, mountain lion, cougar, puma, catamount? Fight!

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (fuK7c)

Did someone say catamite?

Posted by: Shep! at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (8iiMU)

132 I'd hate to be the next guy who starts bragging about the deer they shot to this guy.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (xfb67)

133
Gillibrand supports removing existing barriers.

Posted by: Ha at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (MAstk)


Good. So when will she be removing the front door from her house?

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at February 15, 2019 02:10 PM (TAmPV)

134 A while back, there was a story of a cougar eating a xer who was mountain biking with xer partner.


Do not go into nature unprepared to come out alive.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at February 15, 2019 02:11 PM (t6MX/)

135 I thought I saw a story today that said it was a 40 lb. lion.

-------

I kind of doubt that - a 40lb. lion is usually still with mom, or it's badly undernourished. Though if it was starving, that might explain this.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:11 PM (AzW6q)

136
Kilt him a bar when he was only 3

Posted by: Sphynx at February 15, 2019 02:11 PM (rXie1)

137 So will this guy be arrested for killing nature?

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:11 PM (2LelM)

138 @133: "Good. So when will she be removing the front door from her house?"

As soon as you wrestle the hair dye from her cold, dead hands.

Posted by: Walter Freeman at February 15, 2019 02:12 PM (I/iGu)

139 136
Kilt him a bar when he was only 3
Posted by: Sphynx at February 15, 2019 02:11 PM (rXie1)

Yeah. This guy needs to get 'King of the Wild Frontier' tattooed on his chest.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:12 PM (bcbK8)

140

66 Twitter Locks Account Of Journalist Who Asked Why Ocasio-Cortez's Boyfriend Is Listed As 'Staff' With House Email
Posted by: SMOD


I wanted that to be a scandal caused by her arrogance, but it turns out he gets a .gov email address to get calendar access. Damn it!

Posted by: imp at February 15, 2019 02:12 PM (w+Z9D)

141 Lots of mountain lions in the news these days. I wonder who does their PR.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:12 PM (xfb67)

142 One Year After Parkland Shooting, Student And Teachers Still Dead, Almost Nobody Has Been Held Accountable

Posted by: SMOD at February 15, 2019 02:12 PM (QkjLD)

143 Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude.

I'll, er, brb.
Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (GbPPJ)

Did the lights just dim?

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at February 15, 2019 02:04 PM


LOL.

Posted by: Minnfidel at February 15, 2019 02:12 PM (Dc+hm)

144 Wow - that alternate dimension guy - amazing he can disappear so fast.

It's nice

Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:12 PM (37IEG)

145 my local news reported this, but they never said the guy killed it.

weird.
Posted by: trapper's girl at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM



We have to wait until the mountain lion's next-of-kin have been informed. Journalism matters! Stop making fun of us!

Posted by: MSM not learning to code at February 15, 2019 02:12 PM (786Ro)

146 Not too shabby. Try a bear next.

Posted by: Daniel Boone at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (QLvwG)

147 104 >>He suffocated it with his foot?

Pfft. John Wick killed a guy with a pencil.

A pencil!
Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (/tuJf)

Three men in a bar. With a fucking pencil.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (NWiLs)

148 My experience with cougars has been much more mellow.

Oh, never mind.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (YslsA)

149 Think this guy will buy a pistol for his runs?

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (2LelM)

150 Why do people go outside? And how?

Posted by: literally serious at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (MwiFE)

151
Nature wants to kill you. Folks need to be reminded of that fact.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (bcbK

----------

Took my kids to an indoor water park/hotel and the entertainment was and animatronic play about a kid getting lost in the woods and all of the animals & trees helping him out.

The main song was "There's nothing to be scared of here. Trust in Mother Nature." I had to deprogram my kids afterward.

Posted by: 29Victor at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (BJKQV)

152
The entire southeastern United States is now experiencing a brownout.
Posted by: Insomniac at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM


The Hitachi Magic Wand comes in portable, battery operated sizes you know. For long boring legislative sessions.

If I grind my dentures hard enough it drowns out the sound of the vibration.

Posted by: Nancy Pelosi Galore at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (jYje5)

153 The bad news is he is under arrest. The lion was on Endangered Species list.

Posted by: nip at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (DfGpI)

154 10 minutes!?!

That's a hell of a long time to be fighting for your life, and there's a reason boxing rounds are 3 minutes long.

Adrenaline don't last that long. On the other hand runner, so his cardio was up to the task.

I'd have tried to put my finger through its eyes, but keyboard bullshit versus this dude actually did it so.

Kudos to a survivor.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (z79tQ)

155 @134: "A while back, there was a story of a cougar eating a xer who was mountain biking with xer partner."

I'm kinda surprised that more intersectional millennials haven't been killed by their house cats.

Posted by: Walter Freeman at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (I/iGu)

156 He suffocated it with his foot?


https://www.walgreens.com/store/c/
odor-eaters-spray-powder/ID=
prod6118276-product

Posted by: DaveA at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (FhXTo)

157 Expected a Flaming Skull thread for the emergency wall building.

Posted by: Skip. Finish the Wall at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (/rm4P)

158 37
But was it an assault mountain lion, with the downward facing thing?

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:02 PM (xfb67)

No, but it did have an assault smirk.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (t6MX/)

159 My experience with cougars has been much more mellow.

Oh, never mind.
Posted by: Vashta Nerada at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (YslsA)


Still choked a few?

Posted by: Dick Cheney at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (wCmLp)

160 I'm impressed as hell.

but I have loved some of the comments on the story by adult female cougars asking if he wants to choke anything else...

Posted by: SturmToddler at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (8D42x)

161 Family members of the mountain lion tell NBC News that the mountain lion was an aspiring rapper who was turning his life around.

Posted by: NBC News at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (Ttdys)

162 john wick also violated the neutrality rules of that hotel, so he's dead to me

Posted by: Wizards! At the bottom of it all! at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (9AcAx)

163 Judging my his scars, I think it was a terrific battle, but I have seen several places including the link you provided that this juvenile mountain lion was 40 lbs not 80 lbs. Near the bottom of the story it says:
"Kauffman received more than two dozen stitches on his face, a brace for
his wrist and an antibiotic regimen. A necropsy on the mountain lion
showed no signs of rabies. Investigators could not determine the
animal's sex, but estimated its weight to be 35 to 40 pounds"
Now if it was 80 lbs that is quite a feat. Still a good feat if 40 lbs. Thank god it wasnt an adult male. Full size mountain lions are:
Adult Male 110-180 lbsAdult Female 80-130 lbs
If this had been a very large male, i dont think at 150 lb human without any weapon would have survived a similar or larger sized mountain lion that is all teeth, claws and muscle.

Posted by: Fustigator at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (+0mVj)

164
Thanks, ace. I needed the levity.

Posted by: Cold Civil War at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (Z2PYk)

165 >>> They have zero understanding of how national emergencies work under 50 U.S.C. 1621, 1622 and the fact that Congress can overturn that reprogramming if both the House and Senate pass resolutions. The Senate won't so they're dissembling into the tyrant and precedent lies.

almost all democrats will vote in the senate to stop the use of emergency funds. You really think Democrats can't pick up 3 or 4 R votes from Cory Gardner, Marco Rubio, Susan Collins, Lisa Murkowski?

Even Rand Paul -- libertarians are VERY hostile to any "emergency declaration" stuff. See all the FEMA paranoia.

Posted by: ace at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (PbpT7)

166 DaveA at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (FhXTo)

Playing with fire with that link.

Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (/tuJf)

167 To be fair, many guys think they lasted ten minutes in bed, so I'm not so sure we should just take his word.

Posted by: Walter Freeman at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (I/iGu)

168 The guy should've banged a peace drum in the mountain lion's face.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (Cd7oE)

169 Bwaaahahahahahahah - whoever keeps nailing Ttim (mirror), keep up the good work!

Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (37IEG)

170 Family members of the mountain lion tell NBC News that the mountain lion was an aspiring rapper who was turning his life around.

--

I heard he was a good boy who didn't even do nothing, he was just getting some iced tea

Posted by: Wizards! At the bottom of it all! at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (9AcAx)

171 He was lucky his hand was in the cat's mouth from the get go.

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM (2LelM)

172 When life gives you lemons, wrestle predatory megafauna and choke it to death.

Posted by: hogmartin at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM (IqOTP)

173 Think this guy will buy a pistol for his runs?
Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (2LelM)

--------

Hopefully. My mom hikes all the time, and she carries a .357, just for the lions.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM (AzW6q)

174 My conspiracy antenna says this is a cover. He was in a torrid gay love affair with the cat and killed it out of jealousy.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM (xfb67)

175 Some idiot brought a cougar to a party......

Posted by: Doorman in Ghostbusters at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM (IXZGh)

176 142 One Year After Parkland Shooting, Student And Teachers Still Dead, Almost Nobody Has Been Held Accountable
Posted by: SMOD at February 15, 2019 02:12 PM (QkjLD)

'Almost'...

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM (bcbK8)

177 148 My experience with cougars has been much more mellow.

Oh, never mind.
Posted by: Vashta Nerada at February 15, 2019 02:13 PM (YslsA)

-------

Yeah, when it turns put the cougar was a 4 foot tall 50 year old woman this story is going to take on a whole new dimension.

Posted by: 29Victor at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM (BJKQV)

178 I thought I saw a story today that said it was a 40
lb. lion, not 80. Not to say that killing one barehanded isn't badass,
but there's a difference.



Now, mountain lion, cougar, puma, catamount? Fight!

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (fuK7c)

40 lbs does not sound right. Male cougars can get to be 180 lbs. Any juvenile that is old enough to actually hunt on his own would be bigger that 40 lbs.

Posted by: redbanzai the Southerner at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM (AmZyC)

179 I go out to CO every summer to do 2 or 3 14ers. We have bears and wolves where I live. They really don't freak me out. We've had a few cougars spotted here but it's rare. Those things give me the willy's . Because at least a bear or wolf is going to give you some kind of warning. A mountain lion will just jump on you from a ledge or branch and the next thing you know it's trying to chew on your spleen.

Posted by: Minnfidel at February 15, 2019 02:16 PM (Dc+hm)

180 Nature will kill you. Folks need to be reminded of that fact.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:07 PM (bcbK


There ya go, FIFY

Posted by: NATURE at February 15, 2019 02:16 PM (RZ6R1)

181 Its exactly because of people who say "poor kitty" that the hunting of these predators has been so restricted and we keep hearing more and more about attacks. People killed large predators like wolves, lions, etc from civilized locations for very good reasons. They are dangerous to us and to our domesticated herds. There ain't enough room in this town for the both of us.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:16 PM (39g3+)

182 10 minutes?! That must have felt like eternity. 80 pound cat is still a big animal. This guy is a certified badass. 10 minutes...damn...

Posted by: turambar at February 15, 2019 02:16 PM (s2J6c)

183 Investigators could not determine the animal's sex

Let me see the body. I can tell.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:16 PM (Cd7oE)

184 Even Rand Paul -- libertarians are VERY hostile to any "emergency declaration" stuff. See all the FEMA paranoia.

Posted by: ace

---

well, trump's SOTU speech only received 72% support, so it's controversial and it's time to sign whatever bill pelosi hands him because it's over. That's what smart wharton business guys do.

Posted by: Wizards! At the bottom of it all! at February 15, 2019 02:16 PM (9AcAx)

185 bobcats around here, but I've only seen them on trail cams. A few real cougars have wandered over this far. If they were prevalent I'd carry a gun. Can't really imagine jogging in mountain lion country with no weapon, or pepper spray at least. (or is even that illegal out there?) ... anyway ... glad the good guy won that battle.

I'd heard digging a thumb in the eye can be useful, but not having rolled down a mountain with a lion's mouth clenched on my arm, I won't be too persnickety about his form.

Posted by: illiniwek at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (Cus5s)

186 Geez, I'm such a wuss.

Posted by: Rep. Dan Crenshaw at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (TpAxy)

187 This is about me isn't it.

Posted by: Detroit Lions at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (7C1eL)

188 I've seen bobcats here in the Angeles National Forest, but the sound of the engine on the dual-sport bike scares them off.

Posted by: Eisenhorn at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (uGHnY)

189 What, no mention of beating it to death with a meatball sub?

Do I know you people any more?

Posted by: Aetius451AD at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (ycWCI)

190 It was a huge story here in Fort Collins. People are still talking about it. My buddy's wife works in the ER where he was taken, she was on duty when he came in.

Posted by: Sodom Chamber of Commerce at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (talIc)

191 175 Some idiot brought a cougar to a party......
Posted by: Doorman in Ghostbusters at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM (IXZGh)

-------

Too bad he didn't have a milk bone.

Posted by: 29Victor at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (BJKQV)

192 Why doesn't the administration have a case ready to go, say in Texas, challenging their positions in a friendlier place than the 9th Circus? Then when the 9th gets done spewing clownsauce it can go straight to SCOTUS for the expedited appeal.

Posted by: Dick Cheney at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (oVJmc)

193 Rand's just jealous that he didn't think to go all emergency declaration on his neighbor before the attack.

Posted by: Walter Freeman at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (I/iGu)

194 186 Geez, I'm such a wuss.
Posted by: Rep. Dan Crenshaw



Wanna get some soymilk? **sobs**

Posted by: Chuck Norris at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (TpAxy)

195 78 Well, *I'm* turned on.

I was over at Ask a Manager yesterday, and someone had written in saying her workplace was in a really unsafe area and she wanted tips for her ten-minute walk to the bus stop. (I was pretty sure that "buy a gun, learn how to use it" would not be a welcome suggestion, so I didn't make it.) She also mentioned that her husband could drop her off and pick her up to save her the walk if she adjusted her working hours a bit. That comment started a thread of people up in arms because "Your husband is NOT your bodyguard!!!!!" And I just thought, that is sad. Yes, my husband damn well IS my protector. That's part of his job.
Posted by: Mrs. Peel at February 15, 2019 02:05 PM (rWZ8Y)

I'd hazard a guess that 90% of the women reacting that way know that their husbands (if they have them) would leave them in the dust if things got legitimately dangerous.

Posted by: joe, living dangerously at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (KUaJL)

196 Let me see the body. I can tell.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:16 PM (Cd7oE)

OK , whada think ??

Posted by: Nude Shep at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (RZ6R1)

197 Male cougars can get to be 180 lbs.

--------

That's about right.

But in the right environment, they can go bigger. I've seen it. There's an area in the Front Range (Hilldale Pines) that's very... cat-friendly. I've seen some true monster cats back there.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (AzW6q)

198 Before the capitalists, corporations and Whitey ruined this great land you typically wouldn't see that sore of behavior in a big cat.

Posted by: Michael Moore at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (4e+hS)

199 If this had been a very large male, i dont think at 150 lb human without any weapon would have survived a similar or larger sized mountain lion that is all teeth, claws and muscle.

Not with the fight as described, an adult would have bit the hand off, then gone for the rest. Although there was a martial artist who beat the crap out of a cougar and chased it away.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (39g3+)

200 This is about me isn't it.
Posted by: Detroit Lions

---

"um, wait until we get big dick nick, then you'll see some serious pussy in action" - Jacksonville Jaguars

Posted by: Wizards! At the bottom of it all! at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (9AcAx)

201 This wasn't a Nigerian cougar, by any chance?

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (YslsA)

202 This just in Washington State mascot killed in hunting accident.

Posted by: Embarrassing Stain at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (7C1eL)

203 Did the guy show up with a noose around his neck?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (Cd7oE)

204 This just in, Trump is inviting the Congressional Democrat leadership to join with him on a little hike in Colorado. For safety's sake he is offering to paint them with his patented "Trump Lion Repellent", made from deer blood.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, it's cofefve time at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (Z216Q)

205
40 lbs does not sound right. Male cougars can get to be 180 lbs. Any juvenile that is old enough to actually hunt on his own would be bigger that 40 lbs.


Posted by: redbanzai the Southerner at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM (AmZyC)

There are house cats that weigh 40lbs.

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (TAmPV)

206 197 Male cougars can get to be 180 lbs.

--------

That's about right.

But in the right environment, they can go bigger. I've seen it. There's an area in the Front Range (Hilldale Pines) that's very... cat-friendly. I've seen some true monster cats back there.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (AzW6q)

Hold up. I thought only females could be cougars...

Posted by: Insomniac at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (NWiLs)

207 There is a peace rally scheduled for Saturday in Fort Collins in remembrance of the juvenile mountain lion. Al Sharpton and Benjamin Crump are expected to speak.

Posted by: NBC News at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (Ttdys)

208 202
This just in Washington State mascot killed in hunting accident.

Posted by: Embarrassing Stain at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (7C1eL)
No more canned cheese? noooooooooooooooooo!

Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (37IEG)

209 Taking nothing away from this dude- he did the best with what he had. Took lion, made lion-ade.

However, I keep thinking: Wouldn't a firearm have been a handy thing to have?

Posted by: Aetius451AD at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (ycWCI)

210 One Year After Parkland Shooting, Student And Teachers Still Dead, Almost Nobody Has Been Held Accountable
Posted by: SMOD at February 15, 2019 02:12 PM (QkjLD)

'Almost'...
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM


The only one that's been held accountable is the NRA, and they're by no means accountable for that.

Oh, and the sissy panzy ass that was fired.

Posted by: Sponge at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (IXZGh)

211 True story. A guy I work with thought he saw a cougar once, so he went on the internet to learn more about them and got in trouble with HR.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (xfb67)

212 Took my kids to an indoor water park/hotel and the entertainment was and animatronic play about a kid getting lost in the woods and all of the animals & trees helping him out.


There is a hilarious Gary Larsen (Farside) book called "There's a Hair in my Dirt". It's about a child worm complaining about the dirt he's eating having a hair in it.

Father worm then tells him the whole tale of how that worm got there and it's all due to the Disneyfied understanding of nature that led to the death of the girl whose hair it was.

It's hilarious.

https://bit.ly/2BBGXpe *



*(note the judicious use of bit.ly)

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (fuK7c)

213 Here is a similar story
https://tinyurl.com/y3f2bux4

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (r+sAi)

214 So have they charged him with killing an endangered species yet?

Posted by: andycanuck at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (Evws/)

215 Twitter restored my "privileges" after I deleted my "#TearnToCode" tweets. I think it was using the hashtag that got me.

Posted by: Dr Spank at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (4e+hS)

216 113 Gillibrand supports removing existing barriers.
Posted by: Ha at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (MAstk)

Run on this, DemonRats. Run on it for all you're worth.

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (RD7QR)

217 I've hiked Horsetooth Mountain many times...Will make sure I always have a gun in the future.

Posted by: Sodom Chamber of Commerce at February 15, 2019 02:20 PM (talIc)

218
I'm guessing it was 140 lbs.

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at February 15, 2019 02:20 PM (TAmPV)

219 Mountain men used to say cougar was the best eating in the mountains but... they were kind of crazy and probably after doing without meat for a long time anything tasted like bacon.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:20 PM (39g3+)

220
However, I keep thinking: Wouldn't a firearm have been a handy thing to have?



The cougar would have taken it from him and raped him.

Posted by: Dick Cheney at February 15, 2019 02:20 PM (oVJmc)

221 Big deal.

Posted by: Davey Crockett at February 15, 2019 02:20 PM (m1xkc)

222 I've seen bobcats here in the Angeles National Forest, but the sound of the engine on the dual-sport bike scares them off.
Posted by: Eisenhorn

But when the engine quits, or you get a flat, a .45 in the tank bag is reassuring to have until you can get going again.

Posted by: Joe Mama at February 15, 2019 02:20 PM (knKQ1)

223 My cat Scruffy what lives under my porch is pushing forty pounds. Has a head like a shovel. Everyday I spare with him.

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:20 PM (2LelM)

224 No more canned cheese? noooooooooooooooooo!
Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (37IEG)

------
That stuff is amazing

Posted by: 29Victor at February 15, 2019 02:20 PM (BJKQV)

225


The prevalence of cougars in the news is because its winter. The juvenile males get kicked from the group because they are little shits, like all juvenile males, and some of them can't quite hunt yet. The get hungry and ornery around this time of year, and will go after the only things walking around in their areas---exercising humans. There was a juvenile a month or two ago that was walking around the main street block of Evergreen, CO (small mountain town) in the afternoon. In front of God and everyone. They killed that dumb, starving cat quick.

Posted by: imp at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (w+Z9D)

226 113 Gillibrand supports removing existing barriers.
Posted by: Ha at February 15, 2019 02:09 PM (MAstk)

A remark tweeted from behind the locked doors in her gated-community McMansion, no doubt.

Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (NYS7S)

227
Wait a minute. A bottle of bleach, some clothes, and a red hat were recovered from the lion's den.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (13CQC)

228
This just in Washington State mascot killed in hunting accident.

That's a shame he made great cheese.

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (TAmPV)

229 210 One Year After Parkland Shooting, Student And Teachers Still Dead, Almost Nobody Has Been Held Accountable
Posted by: SMOD at February 15, 2019 02:12 PM (QkjLD)

'Almost'...
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM

The only one that's been held accountable is the NRA, and they're by no means accountable for that.

Oh, and the sissy panzy ass that was fired.
Posted by: Sponge at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (IXZGh)

So the shooter is out there, running around free?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (bcbK8)

230 Thing about cats is they are all muscles, there are times I am amazed how strong my house cat is and she is under 10 pounds.

Posted by: Skip. Finish the Wall at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (/rm4P)

231 Puma choked by a Puma

Posted by: PUMA Advertising agency at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (RZ6R1)

232 I smell a douchebag in the thread.

Posted by: Sponge at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (IXZGh)

233

*diddiditdadititdadadit
"Breaking News!


This just in from our Colorado desk: a man who said he killed a lion while out jogging has just admitted he lied about the whole thing!

Here are his own words: "It's weird being considered a celebrity for just surviving, which is a
weird way to achieve a certain degree of notoriety,"
Kauffman said. "For
the most part I tend to lie
under the radar a little bit."


He has been identified as a Republican voter who loves wearing his blood-red MAGA hat while out on runs, looking for his victims and as practice running away from the police.

Film at 11."
from CNNABDNBCCBSHEADLINENEWSFOXNEWS

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (HaL55)

234
Wait a minute. A bottle of bleach, some clothes, and a red hat were recovered from the lion's den.
Posted by: Blonde Morticia at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (13CQC

====


Oh woops, that was comment #11. Hey, Bro!

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (13CQC)

235 227
Wait a minute. A bottle of bleach, some clothes, and a red hat were recovered from the lion's den.
Posted by: Blonde Morticia at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (13CQC)

And some clothesline.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (NWiLs)

236 202
This just in Washington State mascot killed in hunting accident.

Posted by: Embarrassing Stain at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (7C1eL)
No more canned cheese? noooooooooooooooooo!
Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (37IEG)

---------------------------------

There will, however, be a limited run of canned mystery meat.

Posted by: No One of Consequence at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (8g9zh)

237 I remembering aTV episode or movie of Tarzan where Tarzan had killed a lion but his adversary had killed a leopard which supposedly was more difficult.




Posted by: Can't resist temptation at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (a4/Ug)

238 PB&J time.

BBL.

Carry, on.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (bcbK8)

239 .....and then without warning, he grabbed the back of my head and forced his hand into my mouth, holding it there for 10 minutes, pinning me down with his weight m and trying to choke me as I struggled to get away.

It wasn't rape rape, but he basically fisted my mouth without my consent.

Posted by: Believe All Cougars at February 15, 2019 02:22 PM (YA914)

240 So have they charged him with killing an endangered species yet?
Posted by: andycanuck at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM (Evws/)

---------

Mountain lions are far from endangered. DOW sees to that. They require a lot of range because of their mating habits, so tags/lots are pretty scarce for them, and killing a lion outside of self-defense is a serious crime.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:22 PM (AzW6q)

241 http://bit.ly/2BEAYjy
********
Whitaker remains at Justice Dept. but in different role | Tacoma News Tribune

Posted by: Ralph(COONMAN0Northam at February 15, 2019 02:22 PM (BqBId)

242 But when the engine quits, or you get a flat, a .45 in the tank bag is reassuring to have until you can get going again.
I carry a great many things in the backpack.

Posted by: Eisenhorn at February 15, 2019 02:22 PM (uGHnY)

243 The prevalence of cougars in the news is because its winter.

Yeah but winter has always been with us, while the stories of cougar attacks are increasing. Its a hunting/wildlife management problem. They aren't allowing the cats to be managed enough because they are so pretty and people feel emotionally attached. Nobody gives a damn how many sea cucumbers you kill.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:22 PM (39g3+)

244 Funny how more people bitch about the NRA re: Parkland rather than the asshole they actually arrested and have in jail.

Posted by: Dick Cheney at February 15, 2019 02:22 PM (oVJmc)

245 Before the capitalists, corporations and Whitey ruined this great land you typically wouldn't see that sore of behavior in a big cat.
Posted by: Michael Moore at February 15, 2019 02:18 PM (4e+hS)

-----

yeah..... cuz The Lakota People didnt jog...

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:22 PM (vIjh1)

246 238 PB&J time.

BBL.

Carry, on.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (bcbK

With a baseball bat?

Posted by: Insomniac at February 15, 2019 02:22 PM (NWiLs)

247 Really, cats are just murder machines. My cat used to line in wait for birds and spring up in the air to snag them when they would dive bomb him. Just crazy fast movement.

Posted by: turambar at February 15, 2019 02:23 PM (s2J6c)

248 So the shooter is out there, running around free?
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM


Well, no...he's getting what he wanted.

I'm leaning toward all the fucks that SHOULD be held accountable for leaving that piece of shit out there to do this in the first place.

But you keep nitpicking. It's what you do.

Posted by: Sponge at February 15, 2019 02:23 PM (IXZGh)

249 Was the Cougar wearing a MAGA hat?

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:23 PM (2LelM)

250 >>That comment started a thread of people up in arms because "Your husband is NOT your bodyguard!!!!!" And I just thought, that is sad. Yes, my husband damn well IS my protector. That's part of his job.


Idiots.
I'm guessing those commenters were either unmarried, or married to soyboys whom they've never considered capable of providing them protection (so the whole idea was foreign),

Posted by: Lizzy at February 15, 2019 02:23 PM (W+vEI)

251 Dr Spank at February 15, 2019 02:19 PM

#LearnToCryptographize, FTW

Posted by: Adriane the Thesaurus Critic ... at February 15, 2019 02:23 PM (LPnfS)

252 I see plenty of cougar attacks in DC. Usually, they're drunk and tend to be very aggressive in attacking young males

Posted by: Wizards! At the bottom of it all! at February 15, 2019 02:23 PM (9AcAx)

253 This is about me isn't it.

Posted by: Detroit Lions at February 15, 2019 02:17 PM (7C1eL)


The last time you put up a fight was when?

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Get Twitter - The Electronic Valu-Rite at The Outrage Outlet and Reduce Your IQ and Soul at February 15, 2019 02:24 PM (hLRSq)

254 I took my oldest and did a short hike in wolf country a few weeks back. Saw plenty of wolf track trailing deer tracks in the foot deep snow.


Of course we stuck together and I was armed.


Choking out a wolf with bare hands? Ain't nobody got time for that.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at February 15, 2019 02:24 PM (t6MX/)

255 40 lbs does not sound right. Male cougars can get to be 180 lbs. Any juvenile that is old enough to actually hunt on his own would be bigger that 40 lbs.
Posted by: redbanzai the Southerner at February 15, 2019 02:15 PM (AmZyC)

Yeah.
I have a 25 lb (not fat) house cat. He's bigger than the dog and can jump 12 feet straight up, but if he were 15 lbs bigger, still wouldn't be big enough to wrestle.

Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 02:24 PM (nRWPy)

256 I am one of those weird people who kind of feel sorry for the cougar . He was just going what cougars do.

Posted by: Can't resist temptation at February 15, 2019 02:24 PM (a4/Ug)

257 There's an increase because we stopped carrying weapons in the wilderness and we stopped shooting shit that could kill us, our families and our livestock.

Not that hard to understand this.

We're all "Awwwwwwwww, Charlie the lonesome Cougar!" thanks to Uncle Walt.

And which one of you bastards shot Bambi's mom?

Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:24 PM (37IEG)

258 He should have just peed or vomited on it.

Posted by: ... at February 15, 2019 02:24 PM (igQcG)

259 Really, cats are just murder machines.

Yeah they are pointy on five of six ends, as Hobbes noted. When they aren't sleeping they are thinking about killing or actually doing killing.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:24 PM (39g3+)

260 Acosta referred to the Angel Moms as having children "allegedly" killed by illegal immigrants. What a lowly piece of shit. I don't know why the president calls on that guy.

Posted by: Maccus T at February 15, 2019 02:25 PM (VpIIl)

261 Just got a great idea for a new ride guys

Posted by: WALT at February 15, 2019 02:25 PM (RZ6R1)

262 The best cougars are the ones driving Jaguars.

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:25 PM (2LelM)

263 Mountain lions are far from endangered. DOW sees to that. They require a lot of range because of their mating habits, so tags/lots are pretty scarce for them, and killing a lion outside of self-defense is a serious crime.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:22 PM (AzW6q)


But killing an American citizen is no biggie, if you're an illegal alien.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:25 PM (Cd7oE)

264 And which one of you bastards shot Bambi's mom?
Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:24 PM (37IEG)

Probably the same guy who's campfire burned-down the whole freaking forest.

Yeah, that's for that too, Uncle Walt.

Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:25 PM (NYS7S)

265 Yeah, I don't stand a chance against a mountain lion, the only thing I'm choking out with my bare hands is.....never mind.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:25 PM (xfb67)

266 We've investigated and can find no motive for the lion's attack. It's a mystery.

Posted by: LVPD/FBI Task Force at February 15, 2019 02:26 PM (Ttdys)

267 That mountain lion had the spark of divinity. He was no animal. And rocks are immoral.

Posted by: Nancy Pelosi at February 15, 2019 02:26 PM (igQcG)

268 And which one of you bastards shot Bambi's mom?


She had a knife.

Posted by: Baltimore PD at February 15, 2019 02:26 PM (oVJmc)

269 If he had played dead he could have avoided all the fighting. A soon as the cougar was feasting on his liver he could have run away.

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:26 PM (2LelM)

270 Funny how more people bitch about the NRA re: Parkland rather than the asshole they actually arrested and have in jail.

Or the sheriff's department that sat around waiting until the guy was done murdering children.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:26 PM (39g3+)

271 As a kid I was all over the woods nearby and as a Boy Scout we'd hare off on trails, etc. all day. Never armed. Sod that noise now. I know better. Of course here in Stafford they've never met a tree they don't want to cut down to make room for more subdivisions. The deer are all over now.

Posted by: turambar at February 15, 2019 02:26 PM (s2J6c)

272 There was a juvenile a month or two ago that was walking around the main street block of Evergreen, CO (small mountain town) in the afternoon.

----------

Evergreen is extra stupid about wildlife... very hippy-dippy, no one's allowed to hunt the precious creatures.

So, the highways are badly overrun with deer and elk. And the entire is literally crawling with foxes, everywhere. Not allowed to kill foxes. But lions sure like eating them. Yay.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:26 PM (AzW6q)

273 One thing I never do when taking a walk or hike is have earbuds in my ears. You're just giving up your situational awareness in the event of an attacker or in this case a wild animal. Besides, shouldn't the sounds of nature be your music outside?

Posted by: Augustine at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (BDZWU)

274 Acosta referred to the Angel Moms as having children "allegedly" killed by illegal immigrants. What a lowly piece of shit. I don't know why the president calls on that guy.


Posted by: Maccus T at February 15, 2019 02:25 PM (VpIIl)


He's the perfect foil for Trump. You want to make the media look like imbeciles? Okay, here is Imbecile-in-Chief Jim Acosta.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Get Twitter - The Electronic Valu-Rite at The Outrage Outlet and Reduce Your IQ and Soul at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (hLRSq)

275 I carry a great many things in the backpack.
Posted by: Eisenhorn

I used to put mine in the backpack, but hitting whoopdies slammed it against my back. Tank bag is easier to access quickly, less impact.

YMMV.

Posted by: Joe Mama at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (knKQ1)

276 "Your husband is NOT your bodyguard!!!!!"


Um.

Yeah, and my grown sons are too and my dad and my brothers and my nephews and any other Un-soyed in the area who isn't a bad guy.

Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (nRWPy)

277 I took my oldest and did a short hike in wolf country a few weeks back. Saw plenty of wolf track trailing deer tracks in the foot deep snow.


Of course we stuck together and I was armed.


Choking out a wolf with bare hands? Ain't nobody got time for that.
Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at February 15, 2019 02:24 PM (t6MX/)

-------------------------

'Specially since you're never dealing with just one wolf.

Posted by: No One of Consequence at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (8g9zh)

278 But killing an American citizen is no biggie, if you're an illegal alien.

"I was aiming at a sea lion, honest!"

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (39g3+)

279 I'm having my 2nd cup of coffee from this morning, I forgot about it.

Posted by: Skip. Finish the Wall at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (/rm4P)

280 Runner was 5'10" and a buck-fifty? Mountain lion was not a good judge of tasty eating. Too stringy and lean.

Posted by: Count de Monet at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (QLvwG)

281 almost all democrats will vote in the senate to stop the use of emergency funds. You really think Democrats can't pick up 3 or 4 R votes from Cory Gardner, Marco Rubio, Susan Collins, Lisa Murkowski?

Even Rand Paul -- libertarians are VERY hostile to any "emergency declaration" stuff. See all the FEMA paranoia.

Posted by: ace at February 15, 2019 02:14 PM (PbpT7)



Remember those blissful days when Marco Rubio did not felch goats?

Good times, good times.

Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (GbPPJ)

282 And yet Mitt persists.

He's like, a fart - one second he's stinking up the place and then

Gone.

Bwaaahahahahahahahaha

Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (37IEG)

283 I'm hoping this thread is just a break before Ace unleashes his wrath on the Make America Guatemala Again CR bill that Pelosi + McConnell just forced PDT to sign.

Posted by: Hands at February 15, 2019 02:28 PM (786Ro)

284 >>Wait a minute. A bottle of bleach, some clothes, and a red hat were recovered from the lion's den.


Huh. I heard they recovered from the lion's den a candy dish, a Joan Crawford postcard, mascara and a bottle of Perrier. Oh, the humanity!

Posted by: Lizzy at February 15, 2019 02:28 PM (W+vEI)

285 if you're stupid enough to enter cougar territory alone and without proper protection, you WILL be noticed.

Posted by: nurse ratched at February 15, 2019 02:28 PM (d7Ww2)

286 267 That mountain lion had the spark of divinity. He was no animal. And rocks are immoral.
Posted by: Nancy Pelosi at February 15, 2019 02:26 PM (igQcG)
===

Psssh. It was just a cluster of cells undergoing a very late post-abortion.

Posted by: Augustine at February 15, 2019 02:28 PM (BDZWU)

287 265 Yeah, I don't stand a chance against a mountain lion, the only thing I'm choking out with my bare hands is.....never mind.

.....

You don't have to spell it out.

The reason I cross the road is because you are always trying to choke me.

Posted by: The Chicken at February 15, 2019 02:28 PM (YA914)

288 We have coyotes and bears who now make appearances. I have one neighbor who refuses to lock up his trash and leaves it open in the back of his house because he's lazy. I expect one day that black bear is going to eat his ass. I told him as much.I also told him I'd be watching with buttered popcorn. WE can't risk discharging a firearm. Oh yeah, he's anti Second Amendment too

Posted by: Marcus T at February 15, 2019 02:28 PM (VpIIl)

289 Rubio actually voted against it.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:29 PM (xfb67)

290 Acosta referred to the Angel Moms as having children "allegedly" killed by illegal immigrants. What a lowly piece of shit. I don't know why the president calls on that guy.
Posted by: Maccus T at February 15, 2019 02:25 PM (VpIIl)


Ah, the ONE WORD that no news media ever mentions with regards to the Smolette case.....

Posted by: Sponge at February 15, 2019 02:29 PM (IXZGh)

291 Evergreen is extra stupid about wildlife... very hippy-dippy, no one's allowed to hunt the precious creatures.

So, the highways are badly overrun with deer and elk. And the entire is literally crawling with foxes, everywhere. Not allowed to kill foxes. But lions sure like eating them. Yay.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:26 PM (AzW6q)

------

I was walking the dog early one morning about a month ago. Watch a coyote chase somebodies little fluffy cat across the street and into the park.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:29 PM (vIjh1)

292 There was a juvenile a month or two ago that was walking around the main street block of Evergreen, CO (small mountain town) in the afternoon.

Which is astounding because cougars are typically very shy and avoid people and noise.

And yes, people who take electronic stuff along with them hiking are imbeciles who need to turn in their $120 alloy walking stick

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:29 PM (39g3+)

293 283 I'm hoping this thread is just a break before Ace unleashes his wrath on the Make America Guatemala Again CR bill that Pelosi + McConnell just forced PDT to sign.
---------------------
As someone pointed out above, if the Pubbies have a false flag lawsuit filed in Texas come Tuesday, they can get the ruling they want and start building.

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:29 PM (2LelM)

294 I do this shit in my sleep.

Posted by: Brian Williams at February 15, 2019 02:29 PM (igQcG)

295 285 if you're stupid enough to enter cougar territory alone and without proper protection, you WILL be noticed.
Posted by: nurse ratched at February 15, 2019 02:28 PM (d7Ww2)
===

And you're just asking for a BAD TIME brah.

Posted by: Super Cool Ski Instructor at February 15, 2019 02:29 PM (BDZWU)

296 Acosta referred to the Angel Moms as having children "allegedly" killed by illegal immigrants. What a lowly piece of shit. I don't know why the president calls on that guy.
Posted by: Maccus T at February 15, 2019 02:25 PM



I wish the Angel Moms would ignore the MSM and focus their attention on members of Congress. Surround Acosta? Pffft. They should surround McConnell.

Posted by: Hands at February 15, 2019 02:29 PM (786Ro)

297


Yeah but winter has always been with us, while the stories of cougar attacks are increasing. Its a hunting/wildlife management problem. They aren't allowing the cats to be managed enough because they are so pretty and people feel emotionally attached. Nobody gives a damn how many sea cucumbers you kill.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor


The one in Oregon near the Sandy was probably a management problem. In Colorado, the cats are simply endemic in the mountains. They live there, and if people want to, they live around cats. Again, in Evergreen, there's not a huge population of them (mostly the elk and mulies) but there are a few around, and when one goes, another one moves in.

The mountain towns in CO are a lot like the outskirts of Bend, but spread out over miles. That kind of low-density, but consistent occupation by people will force anything with a large range into contact with people, in time.

Posted by: imp at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (w+Z9D)

298 He should have had sex with the cougar and called it an Uber.

Posted by: literally serious at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (MwiFE)

299 Can't you jog with a CCW handgun in Colorado?

Posted by: Marcus T at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (VpIIl)

300 We've got cougars (the genuine, biological "puma concolor" kind) and they stalk kids in local playgrounds - like a block from our house - and in general are like what this guy encountered, as opposed to the environmentalist fantasy kind.

Posted by: Skookumchuk at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (k3g2v)

301 "I was aiming at a sea lion, honest!"
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (39g3+)


And if the a-hole had hit the sea lion he'd have been in more trouble than murdering the girl.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (Cd7oE)

302 I'm having my 2nd cup of coffee from this morning, I forgot about it.
Posted by: Skip. Finish the Wall at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (/rm4P)


That's funny. Jim NEVER has a second cup of coffee at home......

Posted by: Wife in Airplane! at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (IXZGh)

303 If a mountain lion attacks me on the campaign trail, I will put him down in 9 minutes or less.

Posted by: Bill Weld - My running mate is testosterone at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (iys0/)

304 80 pound mountain lion not such a big deal.


Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (MTjB1)

305 The juvenile mountain lion had just joined a gang. He was supposed to kill the man to gain a full gang membership. And a tattoo of a tear under his right eye.

Posted by: JAS at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (3HNOQ)

306 Has anyone determined if the guy made a condom out of his cougar? If not, #fail.

Posted by: Dr Spank at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (4e+hS)

307 Posted by: Augustine at February 15, 2019 02:27 PM (BDZWU)

Even in urban commieland here, I only use one bud. I need to hear what's going on around me. Picked up that habit when the kids were little and I needed adult stuff going in one ear to relieve the intense boredom of the playground lefty mommy circuit. I still shop with one earbud in to relieve the monotony.

Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (nRWPy)

308 299 Can't you jog with a CCW handgun in Colorado?

CO is rapidly becoming East California, so I suspect if you could not too long ago you probably can't now.

Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (NYS7S)

309 Exit . . . . Stage left!

Posted by: Snaggletooth at February 15, 2019 02:31 PM (QLvwG)

310 I do this shit in my sleep.
Posted by: Brian Williams at February 15, 2019 02:29 PM (igQcG)


Yes, because you're only accomplished in your dreams, fucker.

Posted by: Sponge at February 15, 2019 02:31 PM (IXZGh)

311 I was walking the dog early one morning about a month ago. Watch a coyote chase somebodies little fluffy cat across the street and into the park.
Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:29 PM (vIjh1)

"...right into the trap the other cats had set for it."

Posted by: hogmartin at February 15, 2019 02:31 PM (IqOTP)

312 I remain bitter that this mountain lion did not act as nature intended.

https://youtu.be/tuL3AYR5eP0


Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 02:31 PM (GbPPJ)

313 I do this shit in my sleep.
Posted by: Brian Williams


Well other than the "do this" part, he's right

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:31 PM (39g3+)

314 Remember when Rick Perry was jogging and shot a coyote and the Left had a fit?

Posted by: Can't resist temptation at February 15, 2019 02:31 PM (a4/Ug)

315 We've got cougars (the genuine, biological "puma concolor" kind) and they stalk kids in local playgrounds - like a block from our house - and in general are like what this guy encountered, as opposed to the environmentalist fantasy kind.
Posted by: Skookumchuk at February 15, 2019 02:30 PM (k3g2v)


The Ralph Northam kind?

Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 02:32 PM (nRWPy)

316 I get a kick out of the people who go swimming in the ocean near seals. They are just begging to get bitten by a shark.

And yet they do it year after year.

Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:32 PM (/tuJf)

317 If I jogged (yeah, right) I'd never use earbuds on a trail or out in the wild. I never use them anyway especially when I was working/commuting up to DC. The metro is full of wild life.

Posted by: turambar at February 15, 2019 02:32 PM (s2J6c)

318 I have friends in Alaska who cover each other on garbage day. Honestly, I don't know how they do it.

Posted by: Marcus T at February 15, 2019 02:32 PM (VpIIl)

319 Remember when Rick Perry was jogging and shot a coyote and the Left had a fit?
Posted by: Can't resist temptation at February 15, 2019 02:31 PM (a4/Ug)


Was it at n***er rock?

Posted by: Sponge at February 15, 2019 02:32 PM (IXZGh)

320 I'm moving to CO if the pussy is this aggressive.

Posted by: REDACTED at February 15, 2019 02:33 PM (RZ6R1)

321 LOL. I left California for a job in Colorado in 1981. There were already "Don't Californicate Colorado" bumper stickers then.

Posted by: JAS at February 15, 2019 02:33 PM (3HNOQ)

322 101 Man Shot To Extreme Death At Naval Air Station-Corpus Christi After Crashing Stolen SUV Into Gate, Engaging Security In Firefight

Posted by: SMOD at February 15, 2019 02:08 PM (QkjLD)

Wow, I lived there until 2016.

Posted by: Jordan61 at February 15, 2019 02:33 PM (QBy2Q)

323 There is some concern where a future Socalist President might take this emergency spending but President Trump isn't the first so its not new.

Posted by: Skip. Finish the Wall at February 15, 2019 02:33 PM (/rm4P)

324 lol, those guys that swim outside of cages with sharks deserve to get eaten.

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:33 PM (MTjB1)

325 I would have patted this beautiful creature of nature and calmed it's hostility to the Trump agenda that is causing Global Warming and upsetting it's natural habitat to the point where it considers man it's enemy!

Some day I will leave the city and see the trees and mountains!

Posted by: Sierra Club Apartment Dweller at February 15, 2019 02:33 PM (37IEG)

326 I have friends in Alaska who cover each other on garbage day. Honestly, I don't know how they do it.
Posted by: Marcus T at F



bs

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:34 PM (MTjB1)

327 I only use earbuds on the trails in town. So I can pretend I don't hear the weedos trying to bum smokes and the hobos talking to themselves.

We've reached our limit of hobos, weedos and Californians in CO.


Posted by: Sodom Chamber of Commerce at February 15, 2019 02:34 PM (talIc)

328 lol, those guys that swim outside of cages with sharks deserve to get eaten.


Yet they never show it. Pisses me off. I quit watching that tease.

Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 02:34 PM (nRWPy)

329 The one in Oregon near the Sandy was probably a management problem.

We're seeing MTN Lions now in the Willamette valley. A couple of sittings in the past few months. One in a nearby park where I go with the grandkids.

Posted by: Embarrassing Stain at February 15, 2019 02:34 PM (7C1eL)

330 Yeah, any of the commenters on that site who are actually married to individuals with a Y chromosome are, I guarantee you, married to soyboys.

In related news, I was wearing a Star Wars shirt yesterday, and the little shit at the grocery store asked me if I REALLY liked Star Wars or if I was "just wearing" that shirt. (Note: I have half a shelf of Expanded Universe novels. That's *after* I got rid of the ones that didn't spark joy.) I said yes, but the originals, not the new stuff. The bagger asked me if I saw Solo, and I said, "You mean Soylo? Yeah, no thanks."

So, I feel like I did my part to spread toxic masculinity yesterday.

Posted by: Mrs. Peel at February 15, 2019 02:34 PM (rWZ8Y)

331 316 or go swimming out to "pet the dolphins/fluffy sea animals, etc."

Just begging to get eaten. Nature IS scary and does what it does. Another reason to avoid Australia where everything kills you there.

Posted by: turambar at February 15, 2019 02:34 PM (s2J6c)

332 I have friends in Alaska who cover each other on garbage day. Honestly, I don't know how they do it.
Posted by: Marcus T at F


Sarah Palin didn't and the fucking media dug through it every time.

Posted by: Sponge at February 15, 2019 02:34 PM (IXZGh)

333 Extreme Death - is there a Slight/Marginal Death classification?

Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:35 PM (37IEG)

334 Marcus T, that sweet, sweet oil money.

Ever watch "Life below zero?" None of these folks pay a dine in income taxes.

They laugh at us. I am sitting in the South on a 68 degree day laughing at them. They work so hard to live poorly.

Posted by: JAS at February 15, 2019 02:35 PM (3HNOQ)

335 I'm surprised Fish and Game hasn't prosecuted him for killing an animal without a license.

Posted by: LGoPs at February 15, 2019 02:35 PM (vFUiw)

336 I never use them anyway especially when I was working/commuting up to DC. The metro is full of wild life.

--------

LOL. When I walk in the G-dless Sodom of Denver's downtown area, I wear headphones with nothing playing. This allows me to maintain awareness while pretending that I can't hear/notice the hordes of homeless people talking/approaching me about cigarettes or money...

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:35 PM (AzW6q)

337 He's only slightly dead.

Posted by: Miracle Max at February 15, 2019 02:35 PM (3HNOQ)

338

Can't you jog with a CCW handgun in Colorado?
Posted by: Marcus T


Sure, but the typical avid runner in Colorado probably is fairly on the lib side. I never go in the woods without one, but to each their own.

Unfortunately it is becoming a bit of Cal East, but it's also a lot of Texas West, so it balances.

Posted by: imp at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (w+Z9D)

339 I get a kick out of the people who go swimming in the ocean near seals. They are just begging to get bitten by a shark.

And yet they do it year after year.
Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:32 PM (/tuJf)

There's a pov video of a diver coming up to his kayak from a night dive, and a seal rockets out of the water into the boat. He just scratches its head. "Hey there, you little scamp, why so excited?"

Get out of the water, you f'ng idiot.

Posted by: hogmartin at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (IqOTP)

340 Prager pointed out Leftists move from high tax states and the over bearing rules, move to a red state then vote for Leftists again.

Posted by: Skip. Finish the Wall at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (/rm4P)

341 Just glanced at the sidebar - looks like ace may have given BertG a reprieve

Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (NYS7S)

342 335 I'm surprised Fish and Game hasn't prosecuted him for killing an animal without a license.

You can still kill them in self-defense. We're not fully Californicated yet.

Posted by: Sodom Chamber of Commerce at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (talIc)

343 Slight/Marginal Death classification?


Ginsberged

Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (nRWPy)

344 Was the lion black?

Posted by: Asking for Jesse Jackson at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (vFUiw)

345 Unless you have a firearm or a knife, the only thing you have to your advantage is your body weight and opposable thumbs.

I've often thought about how I would deal with this sort of situation and Crushing the Windpipe is the only way to go.

...if you're lucky.

Sounds easy, but it ain't simple. I'll probably be attacked by a pack of cuyotes for making this post. You may possibly read my obituary because Nature doesn't give a shit about tactics.

Posted by: The One Who Knocks at February 15, 2019 02:37 PM (Ckg4U)

346 the article says the corrected weight was 35-40 pounds. That is still a lot of cougar .... I don't see why it is not enough for a juvenile to attack, but a quick search didn't turn up any experts. The pics I saw though, looks plenty big enough to attack a 150 pound man.

Posted by: illiniwek at February 15, 2019 02:37 PM (Cus5s)

347 316 I get a kick out of the people who go swimming in the ocean near seals. They are just begging to get bitten by a shark.

And yet they do it year after year.
Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:32 PM (/tuJf)


I was body-surfing once here in SoCal, in a place that has had a number of shark attacks in the past, treading water when I saw a dark shadow passing underneath me. I almost messed myself, and then the shadow surfaced near me. It was a sea lion. I was weak with relief, but got out of the water anyway, for just the reason you mentioned.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:37 PM (Cd7oE)

348 This allows me to maintain awareness while pretending that I can't hear/notice the hordes of homeless people talking/approaching me about cigarettes or money...
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:35 PM (AzW6q)

Yep, same. I know it's far, far worse in Denver but that's getting to be bad in FoCo now too.

Posted by: Sodom Chamber of Commerce at February 15, 2019 02:37 PM (talIc)

349 What about poin-ted sticks!

Posted by: DamnedYankee at February 15, 2019 02:38 PM (37IEG)

350 I hate sea lions.

Posted by: Boulder terlit hobo at February 15, 2019 02:38 PM (AsTU5)

351 When I walk in the G-dless Sodom of Denver's downtown area, I wear headphones with nothing playing.

I do that on airplanes. Leave me the hell alone, I do not want to talk.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:38 PM (39g3+)

352 Betoff.

My substitute for sock off

Posted by: LGoPs at February 15, 2019 02:38 PM (vFUiw)

353 LOL. When I walk in the G-dless Sodom of Denver's downtown area, I wear headphones with nothing playing. This allows me to maintain awareness while pretending that I can't hear/notice the hordes of homeless people talking/approaching me about cigarettes or money...
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:35 PM (AzW6q)


I was reading a book that had a character that was deaf who walked around with headphones on. He was asked why and he said that way people assumed he was an asshole who had his music up and that's why he ignored them as opposed to having to do the sorry I'm deaf every time.

Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 02:38 PM (GbPPJ)

354 Sweet little seals aren't so sweet when you see them hunting and eating penguins. It is all relative I suppose, but I would not want to be swimming in the same vicinity of a gathering of seals for a number of reasons.

Posted by: washrivergal at February 15, 2019 02:38 PM (Kcf2u)

355 Several (10+) years ago a 56 year old woman was killed by a mountain lion in Cuyamaca Rancho State Park in San Diego County. Stupid idiot mistook it for Balboa Park.

Posted by: JAS at February 15, 2019 02:39 PM (3HNOQ)

356 I tried to strangle the bear but he laughed at me in that annoying bear laugh. I can't believe I loved those bastards at one time.

Posted by: Zombie Timothy Treadwell. at February 15, 2019 02:39 PM (a4/Ug)

357 Exit . . . . Stage left!


Posted by: Snaggletooth at February 15, 2019 02:31 PM


Heavens to mergatroid even...Looking back now, Snaggletooh was ghey.

Posted by: Minnfidel at February 15, 2019 02:39 PM (Dc+hm)

358 I hate sea lions.
Posted by: Boulder terlit hobo at February 15, 2019 02:38 PM (AsTU5)

Well you should stop fu-

Oh. Very clever.

Posted by: hogmartin at February 15, 2019 02:39 PM (IqOTP)

359 There's a pov video of a diver coming up to his kayak from a night dive, and a seal rockets out of the water into the boat. He just scratches its head. "Hey there, you little scamp, why so excited?"

Get out of the water, you f'ng idiot.
Posted by: hogmartin at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (IqOTP)


A night dive?? In a wetsuit, perchance? Did he leave a suicide note behind?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:39 PM (Cd7oE)

360 I am wondering if it was in Leftifonia what would happen to the guy.

Posted by: Skip. Finish the Wall at February 15, 2019 02:39 PM (/rm4P)

361 how many people here have an 80 pound dog? 80 pounds of teeth and claws can fuck you up but if you keep your wits about you it should be at least an even match, especially when you have an extra 100 lbs on them.

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:39 PM (MTjB1)

362
Rubio actually voted against it.
Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:29 PM (xfb67

====

He's running in 2024.

Posted by: Blonde Morticia at February 15, 2019 02:39 PM (13CQC)

363 341
Just glanced at the sidebar - looks like ace may have given BertG a reprieve

Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (NYS7S)

Saw the same. I hope so. Point made.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at February 15, 2019 02:40 PM (t6MX/)

364 More people are killed in those parks by serial killers than cougars.

Posted by: Zombie Timothy Treadwell. at February 15, 2019 02:40 PM (a4/Ug)

365 Sounds easy, but it ain't simple. I'll probably be attacked by a pack of cuyotes for making this post. You may possibly read my obituary because Nature doesn't give a shit about tactics.

Well cougar has been training since birth to kill you, and you're just a guy with thumbs. The theory is strong but when its clawing your intestines out in slimy piles with its rear legs, things change character a bit.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:40 PM (39g3+)

366 >>There's a pov video of a diver coming up to his kayak from a night dive, and a seal rockets out of the water into the boat. He just scratches its head. "Hey there, you little scamp, why so excited?"

>>Get out of the water, you f'ng idiot.

We used to do a lot of night dives when I was working in PR. The only time I felt a bit of pucker was getting out of the water.

We'd see sharks when we were diving but they never bothered us. But on the surface it's a whole different story. Get. In. The. Boat.

Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:40 PM (/tuJf)

367 those "native" stickers in colorado are shorthand for "loser."

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:40 PM (MTjB1)

368 "Several (10+) years ago a 56 year old woman was killed by a mountain lion in Cuyamaca Rancho State Park in San Diego County. Stupid idiot mistook it for Balboa Park."
-Posted by: JAS at February 15, 2019 02:39 PM (3HNOQ)

Mountain lions are terrible with their sense of direction.

Posted by: The One Who Knocks at February 15, 2019 02:40 PM (Ckg4U)

369 I'll delurk for this. You can open carry in Colorado. Colorado is a shall issue state as far as CCW goes. I see many people in the mountains carry, and this is in Boulder County.

Posted by: charles w at February 15, 2019 02:40 PM (U6TH0)

370 I skeert a possum last night going into the garage. Does that count?

Posted by: weft cut-loop at February 15, 2019 02:41 PM (0ogxh)

371 It'd be fun to release some cougars on light rail and see what happens.

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:41 PM (2LelM)

372 Saw a picture in a magazine of a kayaker off the coast of Australia (Great Barrier Reef). A biologist who specialized in sharks. Anyway, there is a picture of him in his kayak being followed by a Great White Shark. The shark was longer than the kayak. Kayak's are not small. He claimed that the shark was just 'curious'. Yes, 'curious'. Sure.

Posted by: Puddleglum at February 15, 2019 02:41 PM (ztA14)

373 House Dems (shocker) already filing a bill to "repeal" Trump's emergency declaration, which will pass the House.

I'm guessing the reason PDJT eventually signs the POS CR he had dumped in his lap was that was the price Cocaine Mitch required to make sure that "repeal" never sees the light of day in the Senate.

Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:41 PM (NYS7S)

374 I learned to love cougars.

Posted by: Ricky Bobby at February 15, 2019 02:41 PM (a4/Ug)

375 Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 02:38 PM (GbPPJ)

---------

Yup. If you look in any way approachable in Denver for the several miles radiating outward from Capitol Hill, you will have to speak to dozens of bums in a couple of blocks. Not an exaggeration. Dozens. Just have the headphones, remain stonefaced. Look straight ahead, and use your peripheral vision to keep an eye on things. Otherwise, it's a total bitch.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:41 PM (AzW6q)

376 We used to do a lot of night dives when I was working in PR. The only time I felt a bit of pucker was getting out of the water.

We'd see sharks when we were diving but they never bothered us. But on the surface it's a whole different story. Get. In. The. Boat.
Posted by: JackStraw at F



that is always the scariest part, waiting to get into the boat

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:42 PM (MTjB1)

377 AOC learning to find the ways of theft and graft from congress in a hurry.


https://tinyurl.com/yy4b58t7

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at February 15, 2019 02:42 PM (r+sAi)

378
Ace - I figured out a workaround for the posting issue. There already is a test performed for 'long strings of text can be annoying' which does a character count for number of consecutive characters without a break.

Let's say it is currently 80 characters. Too many, especially if upper case letters. Makes a mess on cell phones.

Change that code down to something like 55 characters. There aren't any words that long, and it will force the miscreants to fix their own shit, or else it won't post.

Pass this along to Pixy. It's an easy fix.

Posted by: Nancy Pelosi Galore at February 15, 2019 02:42 PM (jYje5)

379 We'd see sharks when we were diving but they never bothered us. But on the surface it's a whole different story. Get. In. The. Boat.
Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:40 PM (/tuJf)

Yep. When you're underwater, they can get a handle on what you're not. On the surface, they get curious. Especially at night.

Posted by: hogmartin at February 15, 2019 02:42 PM (IqOTP)

380 Wow... 80 lbs isn't actually small.

0% soy.

And also the joke there about MAGA country is funny.

Posted by: Synova (reversion to pseudonymous) at February 15, 2019 02:42 PM (BD/yx)

381

I'll delurk for this. You can open carry in Colorado. Colorado is a shall issue state as far as CCW goes. I see many people in the mountains carry, and this is in Boulder County.
Posted by: charles w


JeffCo has a no open carry rule on their trails. They can't say squat about legal concealed.

Posted by: imp at February 15, 2019 02:42 PM (w+Z9D)

382 So did Bezos send dick pixs to AOC?

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (2LelM)

383 I'll delurk for this. You can open carry in Colorado. Colorado is a shall issue state as far as CCW goes. I see many people in the mountains carry, and this is in Boulder County.
Posted by: charles w at F



that won't last. that has to be next on their list of things to do.

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (MTjB1)

384
sock off

Posted by: Newest Nic at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (jYje5)

385 Why would I abandon Trump? Look at the alternatives.... Anybody that says that had it with Trump is a not a real Trump voter/ supporter. Just trying to drive his numbers down. Do they want Warren, Harris, and those other clowns declaring their campaign for POTUS.

Posted by: El Cid Flyboy at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (qM84C)

386 Sweet little seals aren't so sweet when you see them hunting and eating penguins

Yeah they look all cute and huggable until they open up that gigantic maw full of sharp teeth to chomp on something.

https://youtu.be/QQc0KecACcM

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (39g3+)

387 how many people here have an 80 pound dog?

One of mine is 75 pounds. He's really shy and gentle. But I'm confident that if he was not, he could be a real problem in a fight. He's hit me at speed in the backyard, playing, and it was something else.

Posted by: Bill Weld - My running mate is testosterone at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (iys0/)

388 "I skeert a possum last night going into the garage. Does that count?"
-Posted by: weft cut-loop at February 15, 2019 02:41 PM (0ogxh)

I almost shit myself when picking-up a Baby Raccoon when it hissed at me.

I award you Two Points.

Posted by: The One Who Knocks at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (Ckg4U)

389 372 Yeah, I saw "Jaws" opening weekend and ever since I don't like the ocean. Nope, nope, nope. I freak out when something crosses my foot. If I can't see my feet, I ain't going in now. No way. I KNOW what lurks in the deep waters. I don't want to get eaten, stung, etc. while having fun or trying to escape the madness for a little while.

And nature shows only reinforces that for me. I watch and laugh and always say "One more reason to stay out of the water".

Posted by: turambar at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (s2J6c)

390 Get off me, Bill Weld.

Posted by: bear with asymmetrical balls at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (iys0/)

391 Yep. When you're underwater, they can get a handle on what you're not. On the surface, they get curious. Especially at night.
Posted by: hogmartin at February 15, 2019 02:42 PM (IqOTP)

On the surface you look like a seal. Especially surfers.

Posted by: Ricky Bobby at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (a4/Ug)

392 Just glanced at the sidebar - looks like ace may have given BertG a reprieve
Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (NYS7S)

-----

Is that anything like a swirlie??? or a wedgie????

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (vIjh1)

393 Yup. If you look in any way approachable in Denver for the several miles radiating outward from Capitol Hill, you will have to speak to dozens of bums in a couple of blocks. Not an exaggeration. Dozens. Just have the headphones, remain stonefaced. Look straight ahead, and use your peripheral vision to keep an eye on things. Otherwise, it's a total bitch.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice

Downtown Denver has been a no-go zone for me for at least the last five years. Not worth the time and risk.

Posted by: Joe Mama at February 15, 2019 02:44 PM (knKQ1)

394 A night dive? He was poaching Abalone.

A related story: My best friend were in college and we when snorking near Windandsea in the morning. A Fish and Game asshole was convinced we were taking stuff out of the ocean. Wanna search the car? Go right ahead. We had nothing. Geez. In hindsight, I doubt he had probable cause for the search.

Posted by: JAS at February 15, 2019 02:44 PM (3HNOQ)

395
There's a pov video of a diver coming up to his kayak from a night dive, and a seal rockets out of the water into the boat. He just scratches its head. "Hey there, you little scamp, why so excited?"

Get out of the water, you f'ng idiot.
Posted by: hogmartin at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (IqOTP)


There was a Shark Week show where the crew was filming a Great White attacking a seal and the seal was doing the zoom zoom loop look you may be bigger but I'm more maneuverable thing.

Then the seal made a beeline for the boat the camera crew was on and jumped right up on deck. There was the shark coming right at the boat. Cue the crew freaking the hell out.

I swear the one guy was about to punt the seal back in the water when the shark dove under the boat. Seal was all neener neener neener I'm just going to sit here and let the shark eat you.

Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 02:44 PM (GbPPJ)

396 We used to do a lot of night dives when I was working in PR. The only time I felt a bit of pucker was getting out of the water.

We'd see sharks when we were diving but they never bothered us. But on the surface it's a whole different story. Get. In. The. Boat.
Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:40 PM (/tuJf)


My wife and I were skin-diving from a boat off the Great Barrier Reef when we saw a big effing shark off in the distance. That was some serious pucker. It ignored us, but I confess I was especially nervous because of course we had to surface periodically for air as we made our way back to the boat.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:44 PM (Cd7oE)

397 When does AOC become Alexandria Fiasco?

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:44 PM (2LelM)

398 The cat may not have been a racist homophobe. Cats are just crazy.

Posted by: Kate Winslet's boobs at February 15, 2019 02:44 PM (VmjCw)

399 that won't last. that has to be next on their list of things to do.
Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (MTjB1)

--------

They're already promising a red flag law - once they cross that Rubicon, all gun rights go.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:44 PM (AzW6q)

400 315, dagny - and those too.

Posted by: Skookumchuk at February 15, 2019 02:45 PM (k3g2v)

401 I said skin-diving. I meant "snorkeling."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:45 PM (Cd7oE)

402 Seals started showing up on Cape Cod twenty five years ago. They were cute. There were two small colonies and a seal watching industry sprouted to take tourists out to one of them.

Yeah, now they're a fecking pestilence. There are easily 50,000 animals and they have attracted the white sharks. After years of fears but no encounters there was the first fatal white shark attack on a human this summer.

We need to end the protection of animals based on cute. We need more white sharks, orcas, Canadians, and Esquimeaux to deal with the seal menace.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 15, 2019 02:45 PM (fuK7c)

403 Just glanced at the sidebar - looks like ace may have given BertG a reprieve
Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (NYS7S)

-----

Is that anything like a swirlie??? or a wedgie????
Posted by: fixerupper at F




so is bertg known for his irrumatio or fellatio technique?

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:46 PM (MTjB1)

404 I skeert a possum last night going into the garage.


It did not have rabies.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 15, 2019 02:46 PM (fuK7c)

405 403 so is bertg known for his irrumatio or fellatio technique?

yes

Posted by: Anachronda at February 15, 2019 02:46 PM (sGtp+)

406 I was in the Bahamas taking a ride on one of those banana inflatables the speed boats pull and was the last one thrown off so the last one to be picked up. As I was treading water all I could hear in my head was the theme to Jaws.

Posted by: Ricky Bobby at February 15, 2019 02:47 PM (a4/Ug)

407 boulder is some of the most over priced real estate in nation.

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:47 PM (MTjB1)

408 I swear the one guy was about to punt the seal back in the water when the shark dove under the boat. Seal was all neener neener neener I'm just going to sit here and let the shark eat you.


Heh!! Sneaky seal.

Posted by: Puddleglum at February 15, 2019 02:47 PM (ztA14)

409 Around here it's black bears. Not seen a live one near my house yet but I have spotted tracks in the field about a mile away.

I have seen dead ones near the highway. Logging truck meets bears ends poorly for the bear.

Posted by: Big V at February 15, 2019 02:47 PM (sN665)

410 Well, you can't eat the seals, I've had some and it's disgusting. So is whale.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:48 PM (xfb67)

411
We'd see sharks when we were diving but they never bothered us. But on the surface it's a whole different story. Get. In. The. Boat.
Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:40 PM


I remember drifting in the water off an inlet with my kids in big truck tire tubes. We had brought the boat up bayside and walked to the ocean. A jetty off a couple hundred feet. A two foot tall fin broke the surface ten feet behind my daughter.

Fvckers on the jetty were chumming.

Don't get off the fvcking boat.

Posted by: Newest Nic at February 15, 2019 02:48 PM (jYje5)

412 Off semi funny sock.

Posted by: Can't resist temptation at February 15, 2019 02:48 PM (a4/Ug)

413 I'm not dead yet!

Posted by: Mountain Lion at February 15, 2019 02:48 PM (t6MX/)

414 Theory is sharks feed at dawn and dusk, cats eat when hungry or just to fk with you.

Posted by: Skip. Finish the Wall at February 15, 2019 02:48 PM (/rm4P)

415 >>My wife and I were skin-diving from a boat off the Great Barrier Reef when we saw a big effing shark off in the distance. That was some serious pucker. It ignored us, but I confess I was especially nervous because of course we had to surface periodically for air as we made our way back to the boat.

Australia might be the only place where you aren't any safer on land. My business partner lives just south of Sydney, a couple blocks from the beach. He's lived in that area all his life and is a life long surfer.

I always tell him that it was just convicts that were sent to Australia it was every vile creature God could think up. Even the kangaroos will fuck you up.

Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:48 PM (/tuJf)

416 A Fish and Game asshole was convinced we were taking stuff out of the ocean. Wanna search the car? Go right ahead. We had nothing. Geez. In hindsight, I doubt he had probable cause for the search.
Posted by: JAS at February 15, 2019 02:44 PM (3HNOQ)

-----

Fish and game officers dont need warrants nor probable cause. They're allowed to trespass and dont have to read you your rights.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:48 PM (vIjh1)

417 I've got a coon that visits regularly. I am amazed at its chutzpah. He has no fear of humans and will walk straight up to you. The scary part is he is really quiet about it. I think I'm gonna change his name from Rocky to Northam.

Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:49 PM (2LelM)

418 don't go into the ocean unless you have to. risk management 101.

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:49 PM (MTjB1)

419 Choking out a wolf with bare hands? Ain't nobody got time for that.
Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at February 15, 2019 02:24 PM (t6MX/)

If you are in a grapple with a wolf, you can bet his buddy is right behind you looking for the best time to bite.

As scary as big cats can or could be, wolves are worse because they are both smart and travel in gangs.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at February 15, 2019 02:49 PM (ycWCI)

420 372 Yeah, I saw "Jaws" opening weekend and ever since I don't like the ocean.

Same here. I worked in the labs during summer at college, and used to body-surfing after work. When the surf was flat I used to swim around the pier there.

Come autumn, the school newspaper has a story about the 16' hammerhead shark that had been hanging around the end of the pier all summer because the oceanography idiots had been feeding it.

Thanks, guys.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:49 PM (Cd7oE)

421 Raccoons are nature's racists. Every damn one is in blackface.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:49 PM (xfb67)

422 so is bertg known for his irrumatio or fellatio technique?
Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:46 PM (MTjB1)

----

well..... he is now.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:49 PM (vIjh1)

423 Just remember people, to wild animal predators, we are just big pigs.

Posted by: Aetius451AD at February 15, 2019 02:49 PM (ycWCI)

424 Meanwhile the cat peed on the sofa%^*(

Posted by: DaveA at February 15, 2019 02:50 PM (FhXTo)

425 Not All Cougars!!!

Posted by: Animal Rights person who thinks they are all fluffy kittehs at February 15, 2019 02:50 PM (hvf9s)

426 Downtown Denver has been a no-go zone for me for at least the last five years. Not worth the time and risk.
Posted by: Joe Mama at February 15, 2019 02:44 PM (knKQ1)

-------

I try to avoid it whenever possible. And I do tell people that under no circumstances should they use light-rail stations north of 16th after dark. Avoid, avoid, avoid. There are criminals who specifically target those stations because the police chief won't do enforcement there, because reasons.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:50 PM (AzW6q)

427 > that won't last. that has to be next on their list of things to do.

History indicates otherwise:

https://tinyurl.com/y3tlmpl8

Posted by: Rodrigo Borgia at February 15, 2019 02:50 PM (0OWcv)

428 not so sure about the mountain lion story, kind of reminds you of some farifax date gone wrong.

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:51 PM (MTjB1)

429 Just glanced at the sidebar - looks like ace may have given BertG a reprieve

Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:36 PM (NYS7S)


He is doomed to a life of indentured shelfitude.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at February 15, 2019 02:51 PM (t6MX/)

430 Wild pigs are a heck of a lot tougher to kill than us. We are more like veal calfs.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:51 PM (xfb67)

431 It was a BYU Coug and not a WSU Coug.

Posted by: Diogenes at February 15, 2019 02:51 PM (0tfLf)

432 Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:43 PM (39g3+)

+++Yeah. No thank you very much! Not swimmin' with the seals.

Posted by: washrivergal at February 15, 2019 02:51 PM (Kcf2u)

433 Sadly, we don't have anything exotic out here - just coyotes, black bear, and the occasional cougar. Oh - and eagles that get in to mid-air fights and drop salmon in our neighbor's driveway.

Posted by: Skookumchuk at February 15, 2019 02:51 PM (k3g2v)

434 Ace says he kills it with his bare hands.

Article says feet.

Fake Nooz!

Posted by: Baltimore PD at February 15, 2019 02:51 PM (oVJmc)

435 I bet this guy voted for Trump.

Posted by: Mike at February 15, 2019 02:52 PM (swJ7s)

436 I always tell him that it was just convicts that were sent to Australia it was every vile creature God could think up. Even the kangaroos will fuck you up.
Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:48 PM (/tuJf)


Ahhh, Australia. Where the sharks walk: https://youtu.be/hdlHMMsP_ZI

Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 02:52 PM (GbPPJ)

437 "juvenile cougar"

So, like Jenny McCarthy?

Posted by: Methos at February 15, 2019 02:52 PM (kOpft)

438 426 Downtown Denver has been a no-go zone for me for at least the last five years. Not worth the time and risk.
Posted by: Joe Mama at February 15, 2019 02:44 PM (knKQ1)

-------

I try to avoid it whenever possible. And I do tell people that under no circumstances should they use light-rail stations north of 16th after dark. Avoid, avoid, avoid. There are criminals who specifically target those stations because the police chief won't do enforcement there, because reasons.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:50 PM (AzW6q)


Liberals working their policy magic again.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:52 PM (Cd7oE)

439 Australia might be the only place where you aren't any safer on land.

Pretty much everything on the god-forsaken rock is trying to kill you.

Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:52 PM (NYS7S)

440 I always tell him that it was just convicts that were sent to Australia it was every vile creature God could think up. Even the kangaroos will fuck you up.
Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:48 PM (/tuJf)

Possums are the exception to the law of Australian wildlife murderifficness, and scientists still don't understand why.

https://stoatnet.org/dowhatyoumust.jpg

Posted by: hogmartin at February 15, 2019 02:52 PM (IqOTP)

441 bert g's aos amazon account shows large purchases chapstik and lube.

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 02:52 PM (MTjB1)

442 He signed the bill.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:52 PM (xfb67)

443 Hunted down that mountain lion like a dog!

Posted by: Mad Maxine at February 15, 2019 02:53 PM (koNhm)

444 We need to end the protection of animals based on cute.


Including Paul Ryan

Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 02:53 PM (nRWPy)

445 The only seal joke I know:

A seal waddles into a bar and the bartender says "Say pal, what'll it be?"

The seal says "Anything but a Canadian Club on the rocks."

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at February 15, 2019 02:53 PM (YA914)

446 Obviously the mountain lion was attracted to the sound of big brass balls going "clunk! clunk! clunk!" as he ran.

Posted by: Blanco Basura - It's OK, I'm with the banned at February 15, 2019 02:53 PM (Gx0uM)

447 Raccoons are pretty cool but like all living things the more you know them the less you like them. I used to like squirrels before they started doing square dances and chewing things on the roof over my head at 3 in the morning. I used to think ants were cool until the house go infested with them.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:53 PM (39g3+)

448
I skeert a possum last night going into the garage.

And his fur was perfect.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at February 15, 2019 02:53 PM (aKsyK)

449 SCOTUS granted cert on the census citizenship question case. Oral argument 2nd week of April.

Posted by: Revenant at February 15, 2019 02:53 PM (NUNXH)

450 Australia might be the only place where you aren't any safer on land.

Pretty much everything on the god-forsaken rock is trying to kill you.
Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:52 PM (NYS7S)

------

Every indigenous species of snake is poisonous.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:53 PM (vIjh1)

451 History indicates otherwise:

https://tinyurl.com/y3tlmpl8
Posted by: Rodrigo Borgia at February 15, 2019 02:50 PM (0OWcv)

---------

Nah. Y5 is right. It's difficult to emphasize how hard left we've turned. It was gradual at first, then all at once. 2018 was seismic. Not just Dems, but the hard left completely ran the table in CO - we're Bolshevik now, and we ain't going back.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:53 PM (AzW6q)

452 It was a BYU Coug and not a WSU Coug.
Posted by: Diogenes at February 15, 2019 02:51 PM


Freshman or RM?

Posted by: Arthur, King of the Britons at February 15, 2019 02:54 PM (DMUuz)

453 Ahhh, Australia. Where the sharks walk: https://youtu.be/hdlHMMsP_ZI


David Attenborough is wearing Crocs.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 15, 2019 02:54 PM (fuK7c)

454 95 FIRST!!!!!

I got to admit this made me laugh

Posted by: Fox at February 15, 2019 02:54 PM (pRgbd)

455 Possums are the exception to the law of Australian wildlife murderifficness

Surprised the Australian version doesn't have like a scorpion tail or something. I think God made the duckbill playtpus just to baffle people. Watch this!...

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 02:54 PM (39g3+)

456 449 SCOTUS granted cert on the census citizenship question case. Oral argument 2nd week of April.
Posted by: Revenant at February 15, 2019 02:53 PM (NUNXH)


It's amazing, and a trenchant commentary on the times, that that is even an issue.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:55 PM (Cd7oE)

457 Freshman or RM?

Posted by: Arthur, King of the Britons at February 15, 2019 02:54 PM (DMUuz)

Somebody say fresh men?

Posted by: Shep at February 15, 2019 02:55 PM (t6MX/)

458
"Yeah, I kicked its ass."

- - Brian "McBragg" Williams

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 15, 2019 02:55 PM (zBaqJ)

459 >>> I wonder if he gets to keep the pelt.

If he does, he should wear it proudly like Hercules wore his lion pelt. Unless that much masculinity is banned in public now.

And I got to visit a house of an avid hunter, with a collection that would give the Morons here a hardon during the entire visit. Really impressive specimens she and her hubby had hunted and killed from all over the world. They said cougar meat is really amazing, was one of their fave meats to eat. Made me want to try it.

Posted by: LizLem at February 15, 2019 02:55 PM (hvf9s)

460 @451: "We're Bolshevik now, and we ain't going back."

I have faith things will turn back to the middle eventually, but I also have faith that things need to get worse before they'll get better, and things are gonna get worse way quicker than anyone expects, but maybes that's just optimistic me!

Posted by: Walter Freeman at February 15, 2019 02:55 PM (I/iGu)

461 > They're already promising a red flag law - once they cross that Rubicon, all gun rights go.

District of Columbia v. Heller and McDonald v. Chicago are still the law of the land.

Note that John Roberts was on the Court for both of those, and voted with the majority in both of those.

Since then, Kennedy has been replaced with Kavanaugh.

Posted by: Rodrigo Borgia at February 15, 2019 02:55 PM (0OWcv)

462 Raccoons are pretty cool but like all living things the more you know them the less you like them.

____

Try to pet a willd raccoon.

You'll be going to the ER to reattach your arm.

Worse case of deceptive packaging in all of nature.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:56 PM (vIjh1)

463 Fun fact: Raccoons have a perpetual schadenboner, due to their baculus.

Posted by: Arthur, King of the Britons at February 15, 2019 02:56 PM (DMUuz)

464 > It's difficult to emphasize how hard left we've turned.

Nonsense. Stop believing the fake news propaganda.



Posted by: Rodrigo Borgia at February 15, 2019 02:56 PM (0OWcv)

465 454 95 FIRST!!!!!

I got to admit this made me laugh


Posted by: Fox at February 15, 2019 02:54 PM (pRgbd)

Sponge does that all the time and it cracks me up every time. So does Maxine Waters' Hair EM-[word of the day] FOADDY FIGH.

Posted by: Jordan61 at February 15, 2019 02:56 PM (QBy2Q)

466 I'm more scared of the things I can't see more than any of wildlife. I don't want no bot fly or any other creatures getting inside me. It's not the piranhas in the Amazon that scar me it's that little fish that crawls up inside your rig.

Posted by: Can't resist temptation at February 15, 2019 02:57 PM (a4/Ug)

467 >>Every indigenous species of snake is poisonous.

Box jellyfish. I don't want to go out from a jellyfish sting. That would be humiliating.

Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:57 PM (/tuJf)

468 I remember as a kid a movie, maybe a Disney production, of a kid who had a raccoon as a pet. Even then I knew that was a bad idea. It was all cute and funny and curious but still, nature. Wild animal inside. Bad idea.

Posted by: turambar at February 15, 2019 02:57 PM (s2J6c)

469 Posted by: Walter Freeman at February 15, 2019 02:55 PM (I/iGu)

--------

Yeah, I'm hopeful that on the whole as a nation, by one means or another, we can turn things around. But CO is gone. It'll turn back to the center/right around the same time as CA or NY, so not in this lifetime.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:57 PM (AzW6q)

470 369 I'll delurk for this. You can open carry in Colorado. Colorado is a shall issue state as far as CCW goes. I see many people in the mountains carry, and this is in Boulder County.
Posted by: charles w at February 15, 2019 02:40 PM (U6TH0)
-----------------------------
Yeah, this is a thing.

I know more than a few lefties in CO, including 3 in Boulder itself, and they are not gun-control freaks.
MOST of them, I mean.
I even know a full-blown moonbat, sufficiently brain damaged to believe every word out of Rachel Maddow's mouth, who (gasp!) hunts.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at February 15, 2019 02:57 PM (Rxduq)

471 So the shooter is out there, running around free?
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at February 15, 2019 02:21 PM (bcbK

Still wasting oxygen, on the taxpayers' dime.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 15, 2019 02:57 PM (nPGq2)

472 Over at Insty:

TRUMP'S NATIONAL EMERGENCY ORDER TEXT

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 02:57 PM (Cd7oE)

473 >>Every indigenous species of snake is poisonous.

....

Are they poisonous or venomous?

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at February 15, 2019 02:58 PM (b7H40)

474 Well, it was only one mountain lion...

Posted by: jwest at February 15, 2019 02:58 PM (/roJx)

475 449 SCOTUS granted cert on the census citizenship question case. Oral argument 2nd week of April.

RBG is prepared to ask the all important legal question:

"Argle-bargle cackle-snort?"

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at February 15, 2019 02:58 PM (vbJig)

476 That's a man, baby.

I hope he skinned the cougar and now wearing the skull as a hat with the cougar skin as a cape.

"Oh? This? Yeah, I killed it with my bare hands."

Posted by: naturalfake at February 15, 2019 02:59 PM (9X624)

477 That cougar had voting rights in California!

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at February 15, 2019 02:59 PM (oVJmc)

478 Box jellyfish. I don't want to go out from a jellyfish sting. That would be humiliating.
Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 02:57 PM (/tuJf)

It would be kinda like dying from injuries sustained after getting hit by a Prius.

Posted by: DocJ at February 15, 2019 02:59 PM (NYS7S)

479
Are they poisonous or venomous?
Posted by: Bitter Clinger at February 15, 2019 02:58 PM (b7H40)


------

*stink-eye*

Well.... theyre not pedantic.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 02:59 PM (vIjh1)

480 Rackons = rabies

Posted by: Can't resist temptation at February 15, 2019 02:59 PM (a4/Ug)

481 Well, it was only one mountain lion...

His father beat a mountain lion to death with another mountain lion.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (oVJmc)

482 not sure what is wrong with colorado, don't really care because we are moving, but it has the feel of some hybrid between a third world south american shithole and resettlement camp for people from blue states.

unbelievable number of license plates from new york, illinois, massachusetts, california.

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (MTjB1)

483 If you google most sources said it weighed 40 pounds, not 80!

Posted by: JudyJet at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (o393p)

484 Look up the smaller Irukandji jellyfish. You get the pain and psychological effects.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (xfb67)

485 468 I remember as a kid a movie, maybe a Disney production, of a kid who had a raccoon as a pet. Even then I knew that was a bad idea. It was all cute and funny and curious but still, nature. Wild animal inside. Bad idea.
Posted by: turambar at February 15, 2019 02:57 PM (s2J6c)


When our kids were little a neighbor invited us over to "see the raccoons." We lived on the edge of a nature preserve, and it turns out that he'd taken to feeding the damned things. We were inside watching them on the desk outside, and literally several DOZEN of them showed up. Our neighbor was delighted, and asked if we wanted our kids to go outside to feed them.

NO!!!!

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (Cd7oE)

486 I know more than a few lefties in CO, including 3 in Boulder itself, and they are not gun-control freaks.

------

By and large, even liberal Coloradans are not for gun control.

But everyone they just elected is, and they control the whole government. And it will not be an issue that lib voters throw people out of office over - those days are over.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (AzW6q)

487 >>> I remember as a kid a movie, maybe a Disney production, of a kid who had a raccoon as a pet.

Want to screw with a raccoon, give them a marshmallow or a sugar lump. when they try to wash it, it disappears and confuses the crap out of them.

And I think I remember the same movie! I think they made us read the book in school it was based on, but the name escapes me.

Posted by: LizLem at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (hvf9s)

488 How does auto correct even do that .

Raccoons

Posted by: Can't resist temptation at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (a4/Ug)

489 RBG is prepared to ask the all important legal question

Ruth: *fffffffffffffffffffffttt* *shhhhhhhhh* *fffffffffffffffffffffttt* *shhhhhhhhh* *drool*

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (39g3+)

490 OMG the comments. Or, at least a few of the comments. Uff da.

Posted by: Synova (reversion to pseudonymous) at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (BD/yx)

491 456: I think the legal challenge is based on administrative procedure (i.e there needed to be a notice and comment period under the APA prior to including the question).
The left doesn't want the question on the census. But the legal challenge isnt that the question cant be on the census per se, but rather that procedural flaws in the process of adding the question dont allow it to be included now.

Posted by: Revenant at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (NUNXH)

492 442 He signed the bill.
Posted by: sniffybigtoe at February 15, 2019 02:52 PM (xfb67)

Gotta pay the bills and defense of foreign countries.

Posted by: literally serious at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (MwiFE)

493 482 not sure what is wrong with colorado, don't really care because we are moving, but it has the feel of some hybrid between a third world south american shithole and resettlement camp for people from blue states.

unbelievable number of license plates from new york, illinois, massachusetts, california.
Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 03:00 PM (MTjB1)


Ah. Retracing California's trajectory from the 70s, I see.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 03:01 PM (Cd7oE)

494 All of this is fine: https://youtu.be/y6n-FboVHdk

And I would have had a heart attack and died:
https://youtu.be/RJra0fcMsVU

Posted by: alexthechick - Superelite Ragebunny. Hopping all around. at February 15, 2019 03:01 PM (GbPPJ)

495

Nah. Y5 is right. It's difficult to emphasize how hard left we've turned. It was gradual at first, then all at once. 2018 was seismic. Not just Dems, but the hard left completely ran the table in CO - we're Bolshevik now, and we ain't going back.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice


You have never lived under "hard left" my friend. The Dems here outside of the metro area are still reasonable, even if they vote for the lefty leaders. Try living under the situation where Boulder Dems are considered "moderates". Look at half the laws from the west coast over the last 5 years and remember that none of those would pass in CO. If the red flag thing goes through, you'll see recalls again. Not to mention the school perversion training. The real worry is the popular vote, since if the perversion bill gets put on as a ballot measure after passing, the right might actually sweep Colorado in 2020. Except the electoral votes would go to the Dem, most likely.

Posted by: imp at February 15, 2019 03:01 PM (w+Z9D)

496 487 yes! That was the book/movie too!

Posted by: turambar at February 15, 2019 03:01 PM (s2J6c)

497 That dude is badass. He can come fishing with us in Canada any time.

Posted by: Muad'dib at February 15, 2019 03:01 PM (sjdRT)

498 *stink-eye*

Well.... theyre not pedantic.
____________________________________

No. They have four feet. so they're quadripedantic.

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at February 15, 2019 03:01 PM (vbJig)

499 unbelievable number of license plates from new york, illinois, massachusetts, california.

I think as more states legalize weed that will reduce again.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 03:01 PM (39g3+)

500 not sure what is wrong with colorado, don't really care because we are moving

--------

#MeToo. Sometime in the next couple years. Have to re-arrange my life first.

It breaks my heart - I love this place. But it's time to GTFO.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 03:01 PM (AzW6q)

501 "FIRST!!!!!"

"I got to admit this made me laugh."
Posted by: Fox at February 15, 2019 02:54 PM (pRgbd)

When I actually get the first post on the Overnight Thread, people hate me for it. I've stopped doing it.

No more *Planting of Flags* for This Guy. It has lost its luster, I suppose.

Posted by: Slapweasel at February 15, 2019 03:02 PM (Ckg4U)

502 We need to end the protection of animals based on cute.





Including Paul Ryan

Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 02:53 PM (nRWPy)

He looks like a grown up Eddie Munster... I do not find him cute at all.

Posted by: redbanzai the Southerner at February 15, 2019 03:02 PM (AmZyC)

503 > But everyone they just elected is, and they control the whole government.

They don't control the Supreme Court of the United States, and that's what matters in this context.

Posted by: Rodrigo Borgia at February 15, 2019 03:02 PM (0OWcv)

504 When my youngest kid was about 8, we went up to Mt. Storm WV. My little princess "I don't want to get my feet wet" 17 lb dog examined the habits of the rabbits for a day, then with the kid standing right there slaughtered one, then another 2 feet from him. He was sorta stunned at nature gone bloody in about 2 seconds. My husband said that I shouldn't have laughed at his shocked face, and should have comforted him. I did comfort him, I said, "Where do you think meat comes from? LOL." That's comforting, right?

Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 03:03 PM (nRWPy)

505 417---I think I'm gonna change his name from Rocky to Northam.
Posted by: Puddin Head at February 15, 2019 02:49 PM (2LelM)
----------------------------
Go with Ralph Northam and call him Ralph.
Ralph is an excellent name for a raccoon!

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at February 15, 2019 03:03 PM (Rxduq)

506 Your mom's a cougar.

Posted by: Kip at February 15, 2019 03:03 PM (BJKQV)

507 *stink-eye*

Well.... theyre not pedantic.
____________________________________

No. They have four feet. so they're quadripedantic.
Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at February 15, 2019 03:01 PM (vbJig)

-----

So they cant move their arms or legs??? Poor babies.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 03:03 PM (vIjh1)

508 Ruth: *fffffffffffffffffffffttt* *shhhhhhhhh* *fffffffffffffffffffffttt* *shhhhhhhhh* *drool*

Chris, don't jump the gun. Those are questions for the case involving the unconstitutional declaration of emergency. Scheduled for June. After she recovers from April's Boston Marathon win.

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at February 15, 2019 03:03 PM (vbJig)

509 Posted by: redbanzai the Southerner at February 15, 2019 03:02 PM (AmZyC)

Not the face.

Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM (nRWPy)

510 You know how to tell if the Trump administration has done well?

When the FBI swat teams bust down the doors of McCabe, Rosenstein, Comey, Blumenthal, and about a half dozen others at 5:00am.

Wake me up then.

Posted by: jwest at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM (/roJx)

511 >>not sure what is wrong with colorado, don't really care because we are moving, but it has the feel of some hybrid between a third world south american shithole and resettlement camp for people from blue states.

not just south American shithole with all of the ME refugees. Lotta burkas in Aurora Walmart and King Soopers.

Posted by: Lizzy at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM (W+vEI)

512 @504
Wow. Did you tell him Santa isn't coming anymore because you shot him?

Posted by: Mad Maxine at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM (koNhm)

513 Once a upon a time, I found Paul Ryan's blue eyes so attractive.

Posted by: IC at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM (LJUs+)

514 No more *Planting of Flags* for This Guy. It has lost its luster, I suppose.
Posted by: Slapweasel at February 15, 2019 03:02 PM (Ckg4U)

----

Yeah. Low T sucks, huh.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM (vIjh1)

515 unbelievable number of license plates from new york, illinois, massachusetts, california.

I think as more states legalize weed that will reduce again.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at F



was wondering whether or not that would happen but I don't think it is going to. when you look at the cars the plates are attached to lots of them are six figure cars. don't think they moved for the weed.

there are some good things about colorado, mountains, unbelievable amounts of sunshine, very moderate weather.

easy to maintain a large bunch of losers and stoners.

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM (MTjB1)

516

Rascal the raccoon

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0064875/

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at February 15, 2019 03:05 PM (aKsyK)

517

Look at all the Colorado morons there are. Whoda guessed?

Posted by: imp at February 15, 2019 03:05 PM (w+Z9D)

518 TONIGHT ON TUCKER: COUGAR CARAVANS!!

Posted by: Bruno Vecchia at February 15, 2019 03:05 PM (fYfkW)

519 I remember as a kid a movie, maybe a Disney production, of a kid who had a raccoon as a pet.


The book was "Rascal" by Sterling North. My first favorite book. It's a tale of the innocence of life in 1918 Minnesota. Our protagonist finds an orphaned raccoon kit and takes it in and has a year's worth of adventures with it.

The point of the story -- the story has a point -- is that the raccoon, Rascal, grew up over the course of the year and was in fact wild and could no longer be kept. Wistful tears all around as Sterling lets Rascal go and then Rascal stops by one month later for a last goodbye.

Then in the 70s Japan made a cartoon movie of the book. All of Japan fell in love with raccoons. Japan did not get the point -- the story has a point -- of the story, so they started importing raccoons as pets.

Guess which island nation in Asia which is home to no natural raccoon predators is now overrun with raccoons?

Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 15, 2019 03:05 PM (fuK7c)

520 The Paolo.

He knows how aggressive these Cougars can be.

Posted by: Paolo at February 15, 2019 03:05 PM (1fJ/v)

521 "Yeah. Low T sucks, huh."
-Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM (vIjh1)

Right? I should have watched more football.

Posted by: Slapweasel at February 15, 2019 03:06 PM (Ckg4U)

522 Chris, don't jump the gun. Those are questions for the case involving
the unconstitutional declaration of emergency. Scheduled for June.
After she recovers from April's Boston Marathon win.


She'll probably have cancer three or four more times before then.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at February 15, 2019 03:06 PM (oVJmc)

523 506 Your mom's a cougar.
Posted by: Kip

you say that like it's a bad thing

Posted by: nurse ratched at February 15, 2019 03:06 PM (d7Ww2)

524 was wondering whether or not that would happen but I don't think it is going to. when you look at the cars the plates are attached to lots of them are six figure cars. don't think they moved for the weed.

there are some good things about colorado, mountains, unbelievable amounts of sunshine, very moderate weather.

easy to maintain a large bunch of losers and stoners.
Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM (MTjB1)


All sounds very familiar. It begins with the wealthy, and the educated, and ends up with the losers, the stoners, the wetbacks, and the guys crapping in between parked cars.

Ask me how I know.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at February 15, 2019 03:06 PM (Cd7oE)

525 ...Bra-a-a-a-a-a-i-i-i-i-n-n-n-n-ns!!!!

BRA-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-I-I-I-I-I-I-N-N-N-N-N-S-S-S-S-!!!

BRA-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-I-I-I-I-I-N-N-N-N-S-S!!!


BRA-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-I-I-I-I-I-N-N-N-N-S-S!!!!

Posted by: Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg Opinion on the next 50 cases before the Supreme Court at February 15, 2019 03:06 PM (9X624)

526 One cool animal from Australia, quokkas.

http://tinyurl.com/yxkwhfcy

Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 03:06 PM (/tuJf)

527 516, 519 Yep, that's the one. I remember that so well, too. Thanks for that!

Posted by: turambar at February 15, 2019 03:07 PM (s2J6c)

528 Some Racoons come equipped with a gun.




Posted by: 29Victor at February 15, 2019 03:07 PM (BJKQV)

529 >>It breaks my heart - I love this place. But it's time to GTFO.



It *is* heartbreaking. We moved to a blue state (for reasons beyond my control) and it's surprisingly OK because I didn't have to watch my new state become that way, see it destroyed as has happened to CO.

Posted by: Lizzy at February 15, 2019 03:07 PM (W+vEI)

530 When my youngest kid was about 8, we went up to Mt. Storm WV. My little princess "I don't want to get my feet wet" 17 lb dog examined the habits of the rabbits for a day, then with the kid standing right there slaughtered one, then another 2 feet from him. He was sorta stunned at nature gone bloody in about 2 seconds. My husband said that I shouldn't have laughed at his shocked face, and should have comforted him. I did comfort him, I said, "Where do you think meat comes from? LOL." That's comforting, right?
Posted by: dagny at F



lol. when I was in elementary school I was walking out pet beagle on a 20 foot leash. out of nowhere he bolts to the right, nearly taking my arm off, and grabs a rabbit. was standing there stunned. then he started eating the rabbit.

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 03:07 PM (MTjB1)

531 When Ruthie eventually passes on, say in another 100 years or so, scientists need to isolate her longevity gene.

Posted by: IC at February 15, 2019 03:07 PM (LJUs+)

532 when you look at the cars the plates are attached to lots of them are six figure cars. don't think they moved for the weed.

--------

Yep refugees from CA/NY, etc. Come here for the "low" cost of living. A lot of them are trust-funders who DO come for the weed, but then never leave. Because daddy'll airlift them a new Xterra and a pallet of cash if they run short of funds before this year's totally dope snowboarding trip.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 03:07 PM (AzW6q)

533 Some Racoons come equipped with a gun.

----


I love you trash panda.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 15, 2019 03:07 PM (vIjh1)

534 Guess which island nation in Asia which is home to no natural raccoon predators is now overrun with raccoons?
Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 15, 2019 03:05 PM (fuK7c)

Right, and they already had tanuki, which is like a raccoon only not terrible. But they had to have raccoons.

Posted by: hogmartin at February 15, 2019 03:07 PM (IqOTP)

535 Funny that most of the current national emergency declarations start ' blocking property.....'

Trump's declaration could in theory just be those two words.

Posted by: Can't resist temptation at February 15, 2019 03:07 PM (a4/Ug)

536 WA, you can eff off with the snow already.

Posted by: Jordan61 at February 15, 2019 03:08 PM (Tsw6S)

537 He was sorta stunned at nature gone bloody in about 2 seconds. My husband said that I shouldn't have laughed at his shocked face, and should have comforted him. I did comfort him, I said, "Where do you think meat comes from? LOL." That's comforting, right?
Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 03:03 PM (nRWPy)

The kids and I found a baby turtle shell when they were just about old enough to comprehend the idea of "dead" and realize that it had been alive and start to get really sad about it. I said, "sad for the turtle, happy for the seagull." They thought about it a bit and nodded.

Posted by: Synova (reversion to pseudonymous) at February 15, 2019 03:08 PM (BD/yx)

538 Donkey Chompers Good

Posted by: Skip. Finish the Wall at February 15, 2019 03:08 PM (/rm4P)

539 530 My dog was a blue tick beagle - a rabbit dog. She would love to chase down rabbits and then look at me once she caught the damn thing. I'd just tell her "You caught it, you eat it" and let her enjoy her lunch/dinner. She would pull your arm off when I was walking her around in the woods or just the subdivision.


And she slept on top of her doghouse just like Snoopy. So funny. Great dog. My constant companion growing up. I'd sit outside in the sun and talk to her all day.

Posted by: turambar at February 15, 2019 03:09 PM (s2J6c)

540 513 Once a upon a time, I found Paul Ryan's blue eyes so attractive.
Posted by: IC at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM (LJUs+)


Yeah, I thought about fucking him too...

Then I remembered I'm a straight guy.

Posted by: jwest at February 15, 2019 03:10 PM (/roJx)

541 Some Racoons come equipped with a gun.

.....

For what purpose?

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at February 15, 2019 03:10 PM (b7H40)

542 Guess which island nation in Asia which is home to no natural raccoon predators is now overrun with raccoons?

Japan has a problem with being fixated on cute. Its nice to look at but I couldn't handle being in the midst of that for very long.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 03:10 PM (39g3+)

543 Trump: the President who turns Texas blue. Genius!

Posted by: Bruno Vecchia at February 15, 2019 03:10 PM (fYfkW)

544 469----Yeah, I'm hopeful that on the whole as a nation, by one means or another, we can turn things around. But CO is gone. It'll turn back to the center/right around the same time as CA or NY, so not in this lifetime.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 02:57 PM (AzW6q)
-----------------------------
I don't get this.
If CO is permanently gone, as far gone as CA, I don't see why you would think the nation as a whole can turn things around.

(I'm not so much questioning your pessimism about CO as your optimism about the US.)

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at February 15, 2019 03:10 PM (Rxduq)

545 On FB someone had a story that the mountain lion was so juvenile it was *only* 50 pounds and kind of "poor baby lion getting killed" There is a point there, it was probably shoved into a populated area rather than killed outright by an older male, then quite possibly the state DoW relocated to a different wild area and it ducked that boss cat and headed close to another urban unclaimed area, was not real good at hunting yet and human looked like easy prey.

Posted by: paleRider is simply irredeemable at February 15, 2019 03:11 PM (eASYU)

546 >>I thought about fucking him too...

>>Then I took off the Crocs
Posted by: jwest at February 15, 2019 03:10 PM (/roJx)


Posted by: garrett at February 15, 2019 03:11 PM (1fJ/v)

547 nood breakfast club evita's bf has an official congressional email address

Posted by: nurse ratched at February 15, 2019 03:11 PM (d7Ww2)

548 I hunger for the D. I can't get enough of it. It's a disease, really. Dudes, dogs, whatever. Any port in a storm.

Posted by: Bruno Vecchia at February 15, 2019 03:11 PM (AzW6q)

549 I said, "sad for the turtle, happy for the seagull." They thought about it a bit and nodded.

Sooner or later everyone has to learn the lesson that for every winner, there is at least one loser.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at February 15, 2019 03:11 PM (39g3+)

550
You know how to tell if the Trump administration has done well?
When the FBI swat teams bust down the doors of McCabe, Rosenstein, Comey, Blumenthal, and about a half dozen others at 5:00am.
Wake me up then.
Posted by: jwest at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM


There's some stuff been done under the Deep States watch that I hope to hell there's some sort of karma involved and all of these fvckers die of stage 4 ass cancer. Go to work every day with a bag hanging from their waist. Never get laid ever again because of the boner-killing shame of having a bag of shit hanging from your middle section.

But I'm not hanging the blame on Trump. I just wish there were more patriotic Americans who knew how to put some people who completely deserve it... let's end it there.

Posted by: Newest Nic at February 15, 2019 03:12 PM (jYje5)

551 our biggest complaint with colorado is really the climate. drier than hillary clinton's mouth after being ordered to irrumatio and fallatio in a homeless shelter.

you never really notice the climate when you come out here for a week of skiing. it is sunny, a lot warmer than where we are coming from and you are surrounded by snow covered mountains. when you are outside the mountains you notice that the dominant color is brown.

have been going through chapstick like occasio cortez at a hole in the wall fundraiser.

Posted by: yankeefifth at February 15, 2019 03:12 PM (MTjB1)

552 I'm not so much questioning your pessimism about CO as your optimism about the US.

--------

B/C it was not a natural progression in CO. We soaked up a shit-ton of leftoids from other states who threw everything out of balance. Unless they suddenly go back where they came from, it stays this way.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at February 15, 2019 03:13 PM (AzW6q)

553 526 One cool animal from Australia, quokkas.

http://tinyurl.com/yxkwhfcy
Posted by: JackStraw at February 15, 2019 03:06 PM (/tuJf)

--------

Don't be fooled. They can be more dangerous than raccoons.

http://i.___ur.com/1AoKFof.jpg

Posted by: 29Victor at February 15, 2019 03:13 PM (BJKQV)

554 "Trump: the President who turns Texas blue. Genius!"
-Posted by: Bruno Vecchia at February 15, 2019 03:10 PM (fYfkW)

I don't believe the research on this topic will turn-up your suggested premise.

*Please Deposit Another Quarter*

Posted by: Slapweasel at February 15, 2019 03:13 PM (Ckg4U)

555 >>have been going through chapstick like occasio cortez at a hole in the wall fundraiser.



There's your problem. Never put that shit on your lips.

Posted by: garrett at February 15, 2019 03:13 PM (1fJ/v)

556 Troll is there and then he b gone... This makes me happy.

Posted by: USNtakim profoundly deplorable. at February 15, 2019 03:14 PM (0OmEj)

557 Trumpaloon in Good Standing YD unintentionally reveals his obsessions. A study in psychopathology...

Posted by: Bruno Vecchia at February 15, 2019 03:15 PM (fYfkW)

558 >>in CO. We soaked up a shit-ton of leftoids from other states who threw everything out of balance. Unless they suddenly go back where they came from, it stays this way.


It's gonna get much, much worse.

Posted by: garrett at February 15, 2019 03:15 PM (1fJ/v)

559 Guess which island nation in Asia which is home to no natural raccoon predators is now overrun with raccoons?
Posted by: Bandersnatch at February 15, 2019 03:05 PM (fuK7c)
----------
Lol - first time we went to Maui it was weird seeing all these mongoose scampering along the side of the road. Genius move importing them.

Posted by: jhawk90 at February 15, 2019 03:15 PM (Xvo1a)

560 Let's try that again...

Quokka- Australlian and therefore deadly.

https://tinyurl.com/y2dtokfq

Posted by: 29Victor at February 15, 2019 03:15 PM (BJKQV)

561 Lol - first time we went to Maui it was weird seeing all these mongoose scampering along the side of the road. Genius move importing them.
Posted by: jhawk90 at February 15, 2019 03:15 PM (Xvo1a)

I wonder what mongoose tastes like?

Posted by: Surfperch at February 15, 2019 03:18 PM (QSdIk)

562 I'll delurk for this. You can open carry in Colorado. Colorado is a shall issue state as far as CCW goes. I see many people in the mountains carry, and this is in Boulder County.
Posted by: charles w

JeffCo has a no open carry rule on their trails. They can't say squat about legal concealed.
Posted by: imp at February 15, 2019 02:42 PM (w+Z9D)

OK, hypothetical: suppose this dude was carrying a holstered handgun on his right hip. The cat attacks him in the manner described, and gets its jaw locked on his right hand, and is kicking with its back legs trying to gut him. Can he even reach the gun with his left hand, and bring it to bear on the cat?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 15, 2019 03:18 PM (nPGq2)

563 "I stopped and turned," he said. "And it's one of those situations where sometimes I turn, sometimes I don't. But in the back of my mind I always wonder if it's something dangerous like a communist or a socialist or a Democrat, and in this case it was in fact all three.

"So I remember seeing those donkey chompers and just having my gut feel the full impact of the situation."

The approximately 120-pound juvenile Congress woman barreled toward him. Kauffman put up his arms and screamed in an attempt to scare the socialist away.

"Unfortunately, it kept running," he said.

The Congress woman leapt at Kauffman's face. He raised his arms in a defensive motion to blunt the initial attack. Its mouth locked around his wrist. Rows of donkey teeth sunk into the meaty part of his thumb, another dug into the top of his wrist.

"As soon as it realized I had no money or wallet, it retreated to it's den of rabid leftists"

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at February 15, 2019 03:21 PM (vbJig)

564 Obese cuck declares National Emergency Seriously You Guys, promptly flies to MarALago to go golfing...

Posted by: Bruno Vecchia at February 15, 2019 03:23 PM (fYfkW)

565 Posted by: redbanzai the Southerner at February 15, 2019 03:02 PM (AmZyC)



Not the face.

Posted by: dagny at February 15, 2019 03:04 PM (nRWPy)

Well OK... If you bag up his face, you may be on to something:-P

Posted by: redbanzai the Southerner at February 15, 2019 03:25 PM (AmZyC)

566 "Show no fear." - Reese Bobby. "Talladega Nights."

Posted by: Titus Justus at February 15, 2019 03:43 PM (k6X1s)

567 There's a young adult novel entitled "Yellow Eyes," about the life and survival of a young cougar.

Read it. You'll be on the cat's side all the way.

I read it when I was a pre-teen. One of the best books I ever read.

Posted by: Bill Maher's Nose at February 15, 2019 03:50 PM (xZjSg)

568 The young man did what he had to, but it's a shame about the juvenile mountain lion. Who only weighed about 35 pounds, not 80, when they found his remains. And probably didn't have mature hunting skills yet and was probably pretty hungry to try to take on a 150 lb human.

Still, that is mother nature, red in tooth and claw.

Posted by: Beverly at February 15, 2019 03:51 PM (DgiIZ)

569 Impossible for this to happen twice, so I bet he at least carries a side-knife from now on.

Posted by: vrf at February 15, 2019 04:24 PM (34e7d)

570 Working all day trying to gain entry into 90% tax bracket. Laughed my ass off at #magacountry

Posted by: ajlfour at February 15, 2019 05:48 PM (Cvr6u)

571 586 - agree, that cat was hungry or ill. Where was mama?

Posted by: TS, The Kid, Tyrone at February 15, 2019 06:38 PM (k+QMp)

572 ..
An undocumented diner.

Posted by: Mongo at February 16, 2019 01:46 PM (BD7Qt)

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