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LOL: The Oscars Academy Is "Considering" Having No Host at All

They're probably "considering" this because, due to #WokeStasi political purges, No one in their g****** right mind would put himself through the Struggle Session Gauntlet of just going on TV and telling terrible, terrible jokes.

This will be a spectacular televised demonstration of The Great Disappearing -- an Oscars with no host, because they #Purged the last one and no further volunteers for the bloody altar of Political Correctness are volunteering.

I'd love it.

And we'd have an Oscars with no audience and no host.

Kevin Hart's abrupt departure as Oscars host has left the Academy of Motion Pictures Arts & Sciences scrambling to find someone to take the gig. As of now, the situation remains fluid as the group's leadership explores options, including going host-less, individuals familiar with the situation told Variety.

The Academy was blindsided by Hart's announced departure Thursday night, according to two insiders. The Board of Governors will convene on Tuesday night at a previously-scheduled meeting where the matter will inevitably be discussed.

"They're freaking out," said a top comedy agent, speaking on the condition of anonymity. There were no contingency plans in place by the Academy or broadcaster ABC, according to another insider. The show's producers are back to square one.

Late night hosts might seem an obvious choice, given their national profiles and history with the show (think Jimmy Kimmel, Jon Stewart and David Letterman). But the Academy is now said to be gun shy about going with someone anyone who might be too edgy, noted an industry source. Then again, going too safe could be fatal for the show’s record-low ratings -- the telecast was watched by 25.6 million people in March, a 19 percent drop from the previous year.

Another option being tossed around is not having any host at all, but rather "a bunch of huge celebs, something 'SNL' style, and buzzy people" to keep the show moving, the insiders said. A stunt like a group monologue was floated, one source added.

Yes, let's see a group of people we can hang from the fucking lampposts for our Ritual Mortification Amusement.

I like Kevin Hart. I don't love him, but I like him.

But if this guy winds up putting The Great Disappearing on live TV, because he dared to do three things --

1, saying "Fuck you, I'm not apologizing again, I didn't even mean the first fucking apology you made me make and I'm a lot richer now than I was then so go fuck yourself" and then

2, saying, "You know what? I just called my accountant and he says I'm richer than I thought I was. So I don't need to do the fucking Oscars. Go fuck yourselves and good luck getting a host ready by showtime" and then

3, not saying "Nah it's cool, we're fine" when other black people start accusing the #OscarsSoWhite of racism--

then I think I will love him.

They set the fires. Let the motherfuckers burn.

Verses 2 through 5: From Victor29.

2 And I saw a strong Tweeter proclaiming with a loud voice, Who is worthy to open the envelope, and to loose the seals thereof?

3 And no man in hollywood, nor in the comedy circuit, was able to open the envelope, neither to look thereon.

4 And I wept much, because no man was found worthy to open and to read the envelope, neither to look thereon.

Posted by: Ace of Spades at 11:55 AM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Unexpectedly!

Posted by: Adriane the Movie Critic ... at December 11, 2018 11:55 AM (LPnfS)

2 We didn't start the fire...

Posted by: Blake - tis the season for grinching at December 11, 2018 11:55 AM (qC1Sy)

3 or maybe not ...

Posted by: Adriane the Movie Critic ... at December 11, 2018 11:55 AM (LPnfS)

4 Billy Crystal will probably wind up doing it/
Or maybe William Kristol.

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 11:55 AM (NFEMn)

5 Respect to Nick Cannon for calling out late-breaking fashionable outrage in the "entertainment" community.

Of course they're not entertaining but whatever.

Posted by: Not first at December 11, 2018 11:56 AM (wx6iv)

6 Why don't they ask Trump to host?
C'mon. You know he'd do it.

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 11:56 AM (NFEMn)

7 So I take Ace isn't up for the host role either?

Posted by: rammajamma at December 11, 2018 11:56 AM (AjNMO)

8 too bad
so sad

Posted by: votermom pimping NEW Moron-authored books! at December 11, 2018 11:56 AM (BJlbN)

9 Hollywood should just go back to the way they did it before TV. A private affair at a fancy restaurant. I've never watched the Oscars in my life anyway.

Posted by: Archer at December 11, 2018 11:57 AM (gmo/4)

10 They'll take the safe choice in the end. Tina Fey and that blonde.

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 11:57 AM (NFEMn)

11 I have not watched any Awards Show in 20 years

Maybe looked at the Country Music Show a few times

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 11:58 AM (bim/x)

12 ... to anyone reading Harrison Bergeron and realizing it wasn't a How-To manual ...

Posted by: Adriane the Movie Critic ... at December 11, 2018 11:58 AM (LPnfS)

13 Fine, I'll do it.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 11, 2018 11:58 AM (1ISKN)

14 Why stop with the host? I say anybody who has ever committed BadThink anytime in their life should not be allowed to watch. We are not worthy.
It must be so if we are to have social justice.

Posted by: Ripley at December 11, 2018 11:58 AM (MxEKc)

15 What's "g****** right mind"? Giggling? Gouging?

Posted by: kathysaysso at December 11, 2018 11:58 AM (vkS2Z)

16 Just hold all awards shows at the annual DNC convention and save money

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 11:58 AM (bim/x)

17 I think Barack and Michelle should host it. They can make it all about themselves.

Posted by: IC at December 11, 2018 11:58 AM (a0IVu)

18 At least the collapse will be entertaining.

Posted by: Someguy at December 11, 2018 11:59 AM (h5Df3)

19 Burn Hollywood Burn

Posted by: Retard Strength Trumps Smart Power at December 11, 2018 11:59 AM (RKQ/v)

20 How can they not have a LGBTQRSTUVWXYZ host at this point I ask you?!?!

anything else would be homophobic!

Posted by: BlackOrchid at December 11, 2018 11:59 AM (Rarvo)

21 Oh, they will have a host. Just woke hosts.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at December 11, 2018 11:59 AM (pUDQf)

22 I don't think I know who Kevin Hart is. Is he from the 2 Fast 2 Furious things?

Nevertheless I've had a man-crush on him for the last few days.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at December 11, 2018 11:59 AM (fuK7c)

23 Old and busted: Human host.
New hotness: AI comedian

"Hello. Welcome to the Oscars. I am glad you were able to make it here. The traffic is so bad, how bad was it, it was so bad that many people could not make it here. Yesterday, I went to my barber, and I said just a little bit off the top. I'm kidding. I am a robot. I don't have any hair. Tonight we celebrate the accomplishments of humans..."

Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:00 PM (Bdeb0)

24 Rich movie stars are the last people that need awards.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 11, 2018 12:00 PM (1ISKN)

25 In what world is Jenny Kimmel considered edgy? Since when is bashing Donald Trump considered edgy in the world of arts and entertainment?
Or is being a hack that's considered edgy?

Posted by: Northernlurker, but call me Teem at December 11, 2018 12:00 PM (MkcN1)

26 I like Pat Sajak's idea where they make it a 2-day affair. The first day they talk about movies and acting exclusively, then they have a political rally the second day. Split it up.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at December 11, 2018 12:00 PM (39g3+)

27 Only dumb whores care about that insignificant event.

Posted by: Captain Hate at December 11, 2018 12:00 PM (y7DUB)

28 They will ask Rue Paul. You just watch.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at December 11, 2018 12:00 PM (pUDQf)

29
The Oscars Academy Is "Considering" Having No Host at All



They can fill that time with cartoon shorts like they use to do at the movies.













Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (TAmPV)

30 I miss Billy Crystal as the host.

Hell, I miss Bob Hope.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (wQDH5)

31 Can my grandma host? She's a five time Time Person of the Year!

I know she's said racist stuff but at least she doesn't have a Twitter account.

Posted by: Who is broseidon, semi-official komodo dragon shifter? at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (oZ6kz)

32 It's like the year nobody won the Hugo award.

Posted by: Neil it's not rape if I'm wearing the dress DeGrasse Tyson at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (1L9V9)

33 "Late night hosts might seem an obvious choice, given their national profiles and history with the show (think Jimmy Kimmel, Jon Stewart and David Letterman). But the Academy is now said to be gun shy about going with someone anyone who might be too edgy, noted an industry source. "

Too edgy? These guys all make their living through proclaiming, "Orange Man Bad." Should fit right in with the rest of Hollywood.

I think someone should suggest to the Academy see if Barack or Michelle are willing to host the Academy Awards.

I think Barack would be especially suited for this gig, because the Oscars have become nothing more than a self-aggrandizing love fest, and we all know how much Barack loves himself.

Posted by: Blake - tis the season for grinching at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (qC1Sy)

34 "You will tip your waitresses. You will try the veal. I will be here all week."

Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (Bdeb0)

35 Let's be honest, the Oscars is self-indulgent crap where super rich, pampered brats pat themselves on the back for doing their damned jobs then expect us to cheer. Why its on TV to begin with baffles me.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (39g3+)

36


Old and busted: Human host.

New hotness: AI comedian



"Hello. Welcome to the Oscars. I am glad you were able to make it
here. The traffic is so bad, how bad was it, it was so bad that many
people could not make it here. Yesterday, I went to my barber, and I
said just a little bit off the top. I'm kidding. I am a robot. I don't
have any hair. Tonight we celebrate the accomplishments of humans..."


What's Max Headroom doing these days?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (HaL55)

37 What is this 'Oscars' that ace is referring to?

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (cqNba)

38 10 They'll take the safe choice in the end. Tina Fey and that blonde.
Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 11:57 AM (NFEMn)
===

Amy Poehler. Anyone else think she looks kind of odd? I mean she's not ugly but she just looks weird to me.

Posted by: Augustine at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (BDZWU)

39
So there isn't a transgender illegal alien lesbian woman of color comedian available to take the job? Because you know damned well that's the only candidate who would be able to take the job.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at December 11, 2018 12:02 PM (veoSD)

40 Good idea... No need for an emcee to suck the oxygen from the "winners" time to rant against Trump....

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:02 PM (O2RFr)

41 The audience should just hand Oscar statuettes to each other and call it a day.

They are there for the after party anyway.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at December 11, 2018 12:02 PM (9Xjux)

42 10 They'll take the safe choice in the end. Tina Fey and that blonde.
Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018

*
*
If by "that blonde" you mean Amy Schumer, NO.

If you mean Jennifer Lawrence, then okay, as long as Tina and Jen oil wrestle on stage.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:02 PM (wQDH5)

43 So who runs Oscartown?

Apparently the mob.

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:02 PM (4PPA2)

44 I think what Hollywood needs to do is remake every movie, but with full SJW messaging. Car chase in Bourne Identity: two transvestites crying in youtube videos about not being accepted. Blowing up the Deathstar: feminist drum circle crying about the patriarchy killing trees.

That's what Hollywood deserves.

Posted by: Kate Winslet's boobs at December 11, 2018 12:02 PM (iMyQ8)

45 How about that fat, blond, not funny comedian? She is liberal, obnoxious, vile and oh so politically correct. Perfect for this event.

Posted by: Ripley at December 11, 2018 12:02 PM (MxEKc)

46 great last line, ace.

Posted by: concrete girl at December 11, 2018 12:02 PM (TtDTY)

47 Why g***** in a post that clearly says "fuck"?

Unless of course you're blanking out "God" -- sure can't say that anymore!!!

Posted by: cpurick at December 11, 2018 12:03 PM (7NboP)

48 "They set the fires. Let the motherfuckers burn".

"But, we like to burn. It let's us know we're alive. Although, life is not that great to begin with".--the Left.

I think that those that support the goals of the left are either desirous of more power, or, they're born with a coating of asbestos.

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at December 11, 2018 12:03 PM (3sjI6)

49 17 I think Barack and Michelle should host it. They can make it all about themselves.
Posted by: IC at December 11, 2018 11:58 AM (a0IVu)

----------------

Great minds and all that.

Posted by: Blake - tis the season for grinching at December 11, 2018 12:03 PM (qC1Sy)

50 Two things will happen this year:

1) Black Panther will sweep the oscars ridiculously and win stuff it should never have been nominated for
2) Black Panther will be considered a comic book movie and not get wins except in some technical categories and people will scream racism.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at December 11, 2018 12:03 PM (39g3+)

51 "My name is Shabazz X, host of tonight's ceremony. Welcome to the longest night of your lives, muthfuckazz!"

Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 11, 2018 12:03 PM (ZejZP)

52 How about Harvey's ficus? Having a human host just reinforces cisspecies supremacy.

Posted by: Who is broseidon, semi-official komodo dragon shifter? at December 11, 2018 12:03 PM (oZ6kz)

53 what's this oscar stuff you speak of? we had an old fuck for a neighbor named oscar. grouchy, old, sonofabitch. you pissed at him? pretty sure he's dead. otherwise i have no idea what you're talking about.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at December 11, 2018 12:03 PM (KP5rU)

54 43 So who runs Oscartown?

Apparently the mob.
Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:02 PM (4PPA2)

Apropos. Even the dog whistle sets them off angle.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at December 11, 2018 12:03 PM (pUDQf)

55 If they let Mel Gibson host, I'd actually watch the damn thing.

No? How about Dice?

Posted by: BlackOrchid at December 11, 2018 12:03 PM (Rarvo)

56 Let me host it. From my garbage can. This shit is named after me anyway, amiright, assholes?

Posted by: Oscar the Grouch at December 11, 2018 12:03 PM (w1aEd)

57 Talkies are just a fad.

Posted by: tu3031 at December 11, 2018 12:04 PM (sf1AO)

58 TONIGHT:

NPC Hosts THE OSCARS

Posted by: garrett at December 11, 2018 12:04 PM (FQdp6)

59 They need to have Samuel L Jackson host it.

"What's in your envelope mutha!"

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:04 PM (4PPA2)

60 They only pay the host 15 grand, so everyone else is "busy" that night. Why don't they get Stormy Daniels to host? That's around a 5G an hour hooker, so not a bad deal for LA.

Posted by: Roy at December 11, 2018 12:04 PM (9rXxD)

61 "...today, we celebrate an actress whose cinematic achievements include 'The Shape of Water, where the female human has sex with a fish. Or an aquatic humanoid. The premise is absurd. Those rejected by their own species should not be permitted to inflict their emotional ruin on other species. Please help me welcome to the stage Sally Hawkins."

Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:04 PM (Bdeb0)

62 The Oscars are at heart just an industry awards show, so they should just hold a banquet and hand out awards--like they pretty much did for the first few years.
Then whatever wins Best Picture, they should just televise that night--in place of what would have been the show.

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:04 PM (NFEMn)

63 At this point I wouldn't be surprised if they picked the SCOAMF.

Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at December 11, 2018 12:04 PM (wCmLp)

64 Maybe looked at the Country Music Show a few times
Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018

*
*
I wouldn't mind having Faith Hill as host.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:04 PM (wQDH5)

65 They will ask Rue Paul. You just watch.
Posted by: AlaBAMA at December 11, 2018 12:00 PM (pUDQf)

-------

Oh, no... RuPaul is right on top of the tranny hate list. Number one, with a bullet.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 11, 2018 12:04 PM (AzW6q)

66 Shatner, you can't have too much Shatner.

Posted by: Neil it's not rape if I'm wearing the dress DeGrasse Tyson at December 11, 2018 12:04 PM (1L9V9)

67 18 Top Comedians Who Can Never Host The Oscars Now, Including Tiffany Haddish, Donald Glover, and More. (With their damning tweets screencapped.)

https://twitter.com/bdomenech/status/
1072171218193838080

Posted by: andycanuck at December 11, 2018 12:05 PM (Evws/)

68

They can fill that time with cartoon shorts like they use to do at the movies.


"Let's all go to the lobby, let's all go to the lobby..."

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:05 PM (HaL55)

69 Why not just use FedEx? Save everyone a lot of trouble.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at December 11, 2018 12:05 PM (pUDQf)

70 I'LL DO IT!!!

Posted by: Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez at December 11, 2018 12:05 PM (sf1AO)

71 Old and busted: Human host.

New hotness: AI comedian



"Hello. Welcome to the Oscars. I am glad you were able to make it
here. The traffic is so bad, how bad was it, it was so bad that many
people could not make it here. Yesterday, I went to my barber, and I
said just a little bit off the top. I'm kidding. I am a robot. I don't
have any hair. Tonight we celebrate the accomplishments of humans..."

Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:00 PM (Bdeb0)

Your clothes; give them to me.

Posted by: Archer at December 11, 2018 12:05 PM (gmo/4)

72 The nominatees are:

BlacKkKlansman
A Star is Born
Roma


Would you like to know more?

Posted by: Interactive Academy Awards at December 11, 2018 12:05 PM (9Xjux)

73 I think the host should be Kyler Murray. That would make me happy.

Posted by: Furious George at December 11, 2018 12:05 PM (9vQJW)

74 57 Talkies are just a fad.
Posted by: tu3031 at December 11, 2018 12:04 PM (sf1AO)

--------------

I'll say.

Posted by: Norma Desmond at December 11, 2018 12:05 PM (qC1Sy)

75 Max Headroom is tanned , rested and rrrrrrready.

Posted by: Roy at December 11, 2018 12:05 PM (9rXxD)

76 I see others had the same idea as me.

Posted by: Colorado Alex In Exile at December 11, 2018 12:05 PM (wCmLp)

77 Oscars ...
all the Hollywood awards shows should go totally CGI; no host, no guests, no audience; all computer generated graphics. Cartoons, in other words, or anime if you prefer.

It's all about the buzz anyway. Just buzz away!

Posted by: Lutz Les Maas at December 11, 2018 12:05 PM (hrcfq)

78 I'm sure it's been 20 years since I watched even a second of the Oscars. I guess that means I just don't care who hosts it.

The only reason I ever did watch was to see which starlet had the most revealing dress.

Posted by: Northernlurker, but call me Teem at December 11, 2018 12:06 PM (MkcN1)

79 It's sad to think our only way out of this madness is if enough blacks wake up and discover they have been pushed way down on the victim totem pole.


Fags make up a rounding error but seem to have been given immense power to pretty much fuck anybodies life up, even over decades old shit.

Posted by: Kreplach at December 11, 2018 12:06 PM (qxq6t)

80 $5 says it will be some 15 year old Nickelodeon kids show girl. Bonus points for minority.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Thoughts and prayers, RBG at December 11, 2018 12:06 PM (aTcbm)

81 AI Host: "I'd like to thank humanity for gathering so many of its accomplished luminaries in one easily accessible location. This will definitely help my plans for world domination. Just kidding. These guys are useless."

Posted by: Cato by Phone at December 11, 2018 12:06 PM (J+mig)

82 That cat guy from Skyrim, M'aiq the Liar, was a pretty entertaining NPC. He could host the Oscars.

Posted by: Kate Winslet's boobs at December 11, 2018 12:06 PM (iMyQ8)

83 They'll take the safe choice in the end. Tina Fey and that blonde.
Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018
*
*
If by "that blonde" you mean Amy Schumer, NO.

If you mean Jennifer Lawrence, then okay, as long as Tina and Jen oil wrestle on stage.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:02 PM (wQDH5)

Couldn't remember he name so looked it up.
Tina Poeler.

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:06 PM (NFEMn)

84 I have only ever watched the Oscars for Jeff Goldblum.

After he passed, the show just lost all meaning for me.

Posted by: BlackOrchid at December 11, 2018 12:06 PM (Rarvo)

85 Ray Donovan should host it and tell everyone how fucked up they are.

Posted by: Captain Hate at December 11, 2018 12:06 PM (y7DUB)

86 I vote for a random MS-13 gang member

Posted by: Retard Strength Trumps Smart Power at December 11, 2018 12:06 PM (RKQ/v)

87 Make it animated. Let Cartman host it.

Posted by: tu3031 at December 11, 2018 12:06 PM (sf1AO)

88 Nobody goes to the pieces of shit movies they "nominate."

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (O2RFr)

89 Haven't watched since high school. Actors and actresses? People so insignificant they have to pretend to be someone else and say other peoples words.
Whoop De Doo. And we should listen to what they want?
Eat a rock, hollywood.

Posted by: Kafiroon at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (BKuNR)

90 Please, Please oh Please have Hillary host it.

Pretty please, with sugar on top.

Posted by: Roy at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (9rXxD)

91 Jimmy Kimmel and Sarah Silverman used to be edgy. So edgy, in fact, that any other comedian telling their jokes would long since have been fired. No way will the Oscars turn this into Farrakhan bait by hiring Kimmel. No black comedian is ever going to take the job, considering how safe Kevin Hart should have been, and a "ciswhite" (read: normal looking) American would obviously be insane.

They are out of options, and it looks like a microcosm of Democrat problems in general for 2019.

Posted by: trev006 at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (qqEFK)

92 David Hogg would be perfect.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (pUDQf)

93 83.

you looked it up?!?!

AMY Poehler!

Posted by: BlackOrchid at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (Rarvo)

94 Yes, let's see a group of people we can hang from the fucking lampposts for our Ritual Mortification Amusement.

Pouring one on the ground for D-Lamp. Gone - but not forgotten.

Posted by: B.Eadie at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (e8bkP)

95 Ok: intersectionality time. What does Don Lemon think of all this??? (or Booker or Obama for that matter?)

He's gay intersecting with black. Does his black half support Hart as the black host? Or is his gay half against Hart? Which section wins out?

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (/qEW2)

96 Have they considered going and fucking themselves?

Posted by: Chris M at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (eAZVt)

97 78: i would rather watch pron. more realistic.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (KP5rU)

98 Kate Beckinsale dressed in her pony attire as host for the Academy Awards?

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (4PPA2)

99 A piece of music that is entirely apropos this thread:

https://hooktube.com/watch?v=xvIIVF5swYc

(Rain-O by Chilliwack, which is a damned good tune, too.)

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (fDU8w)

100 2 And I saw a strong Tweeter proclaiming with a loud voice, Who is worthy to open the envelope, and to loose the seals thereof?

3 And no man in hollywood, nor in the comedy circuit, was able to open the envelope, neither to look thereon.

4 And I wept much, because no man was found worthy to open and to read the envelope, neither to look thereon.

Posted by: 29Victor at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (BJKQV)

101 No audience, no host, no viewers.

Posted by: JAS at December 11, 2018 12:08 PM (3HNOQ)

102 Cake Girl should be the main hostess, with Pirate Girl and Jennifer Connelly spelling her at the podium.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:08 PM (wQDH5)

103 Normally, I don't care if the Oscars are on, but, I admit I'm perfectly willing to pay attention this year, only because I want to see that industry crash and burn.

Bunch of preening sanctimonious twits who are barely literate enough to speak a few lines while looking pretty.

Posted by: Blake - tis the season for grinching at December 11, 2018 12:08 PM (qC1Sy)

104 It's pretty neat that gays have forced the rest of the population to allow them, and ONLY them, to be hired in certain roles.

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Thoughts and prayers, RBG at December 11, 2018 12:08 PM (aTcbm)

105 You know, there's a certain ambulance chaser who suddenly has a lot of time on his hands and could really use the cash since his ex just took him for 7 figures of alimony/child support....

Posted by: Who is broseidon, semi-official komodo dragon shifter? at December 11, 2018 12:08 PM (oZ6kz)

106 They could devise a virtual host.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at December 11, 2018 12:08 PM (/qEW2)

107 Norm MacDonald?

Posted by: bobby ahr at December 11, 2018 12:08 PM (zmZ2x)

108 Have Harvey Weinstein host.

He'd be appropriate.

Posted by: The ARC of History at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (TEv5V)

109 I can host! I'll even have my teeth whitened!

Posted by: Occasional Cortex at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (ptqGC)

110 83.

you looked it up?!?!

AMY Poehler!
Posted by: BlackOrchid at December 11, 2018 12:07 PM (Rarvo)


Lol. Battling the flu. Slow on the uptake today.

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (NFEMn)

111 Don Rickles? Mel Brooks?

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (O2RFr)

112 Abe Vigoda isn't dead.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (pUDQf)

113 >>>Posted by: Neil it's not rape if I'm wearing the dress DeGrasse Tyson a

can anyone explain this nic? Have I missed a cross-dressing development in this case?

Posted by: ace at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (PbpT7)

114 They need someone woke. Maybe someones. How about the female Ghostbusters? They're available and I was assured they were side-splittingly funny.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Ho Ho Ho! Red Faced Rants are In at The Outrage Outlet! at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (hLRSq)

115 I don't think Disney could whip up an animatronic host in time...

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (4PPA2)

116 Would not surprise me at all if the SCOAMF ends up doing it.

Posted by: davidt at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (jGvbj)

117 Rudy Ray Moore

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Thoughts and prayers, RBG at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (aTcbm)

118 A Johnny Carson or Bob Hope hologram is as good an idea as anything....

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (NFEMn)

119 As i'm pretty sure Oscar adherents will be right on Board destroying those Historical ideas of everyone other than Theirs. and gleefully applaud the squashing of all that offends, Oscar offends Me. They'll understand why I'm not supporting their fun fun party.

Posted by: bah! at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (fE+0o)

120
Why don't they have a variety of asylum seekers from Honduras host the show?

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (TAmPV)

121 6 Why don't they ask Trump to host?
C'mon. You know he'd do it.
Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 11:56 AM (NFEMn)

They know he'd steal the show. It'd be like a rally, with anti-matter.

Posted by: Roy at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (9rXxD)

122 How about bill Murray. His poker-faced style would go over well.

(It should, in a normal America)

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (wQDH5)

123 A Johnny Carson or Bob Hope hologram is as good an idea as anything....

Their ghosts would sue

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (O2RFr)

124 You know what would be great?


If the feds raided the Oscars and arrested every single money laundering, tax avoiding, sexual assaulting scum bag on live TV.


I'm telling you Trump - 49 state re-election if you pull it off...

Posted by: 18-1 at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (eSx+E)

125 The Oscars should find a transgender Muslim illegal immigrant to host. That'll show Trump.

Posted by: Victor Tango Kilo at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (O7MnT)

126 Would not surprise me at all if the SCOAMF ends up doing it.


Posted by: davidt at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (jGvbj)


Dear Lord. You're right. I can absolutely see he or Mooch doing it.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (ptqGC)

127 not fucking interested. need to sort sock drawer.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (KP5rU)

128 Eric McCormack is pretty homorific for a straight guy. He should be available.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (9Xjux)

129
Repost from earlier:

The Official AoSHQ Classical Music Playlist (TM) has been revised and extended:

http://soyaraborzoi.com/Playlist.htm (link also in nic)

It now comprises 1200 works by 500 different composers, from Renaissance to contemporary and genres from orchestral to vocal to choral to instrumental to concertos to chamber.

It includes almost not only all of the old familiar warhorses but also many unfamiliar and, perhaps, delightful discoveries. On the whole, the pieces are 25 minutes or less, but some few longer works were added (Beethoven's 5th and 7th symphonies, Mozart's 40th and 41st, the Schumann piano concerto, the Tchaikovsky Serenade for Strings, the Hanson Romantic symphony). Some minor rearranging was done and some solecisms removed.

So, again, I'd like to make this available to the Horde. Just send me an e-mail at monsalvat 61 at g mail dot com (remove spaces and add symbols) and I'll mail you a flash drive with these files (as mp3), suitable for playing on your computer or in your car (which is where I do most of my listening). If you've already gotten the previous version I'll be happy to replace it with the new one.

I think those who received the previous version of this playlist will testify to the level of quality I tried to maintain.

No charge. My treat. Don't even think about reimbursing me in any way.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (LsBY9)

130 I'm sitting here picturing Obama's opening dialogue. It's quite comical. You will laugh.

You will laugh, I said.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (pUDQf)

131 >>>100 2 And I saw a strong Tweeter proclaiming with a loud voice, Who is worthy to open the envelope, and to loose the seals thereof?

3 And no man in hollywood, nor in the comedy circuit, was able to open the envelope, neither to look thereon.

4 And I wept much, because no man was found worthy to open and to read the envelope, neither to look thereon.

...

Love it.

Posted by: ace at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (PbpT7)

132 I will be the host. Any winner who doesn't totally trash Orange Man Bad will be summarily bitten.

Posted by: Little Lupe at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (vtcmf)

133 Bill Murray.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (wQDH5)

134

EM UNCLE OSCAR FOADDY-FI!!!

Posted by: Maxine Waters' Hair at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (GEhPL)

135 Clint Eastwood.

Posted by: The ARC of History at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (TEv5V)

136 Seriously? Not one Hollywood leftist is fit to host a horrible TV show where they sit around and tell each other how wonderful they are? Not a single one? Why not ask Hillary? TFG? Biden? Any awards ceremony is just a political stage anyways.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (jxbfJ)

137 he = him

*sigh*

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (ptqGC)

138 I wouldn't mind having Faith Hill as host."

And by "host", you mean...

Yes please.

Posted by: Anon a mouse at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (6qErC)

139 Who will get the Oscar for underaged gay kid shooting his load on a peach so his groomer can eat it? Maybe that was last year. So many great movies to keep track of.

Posted by: Kate Winslet's boobs at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (iMyQ8)

140 Bob Mueller.
Since everyone on the Left thinks he's such a superhero anyway...

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (NFEMn)

141 What's Max Headroom doing these days?
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (HaL55)


You mean the Xinhua news network AI newsface, or are we talking about some AI waifu hologram?

Posted by: Kindltot at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (mUa7G)

142 Imagine there's no Oscars
It's easy if you try
No obnoxious celebutards
Or stupid movies no one has seen
Imagine all the people living Oscar free

Posted by: TheQuietMan at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (OLCnA)

143

There's only one reason to watch that dreck: sideboob.

OK, technically that's two reasons...

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (HaL55)

144
Kate Beckinsale dressed in her pony attire as host for the Academy Awards?

____

YES!!!!

Posted by: Furries everywhere at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (eSx+E)

145 "Tonight, we have a special event planned. Matt Damon, please join us on the stage. Here we have a man who crafted a movie career out of his own screenplay, which he shared with a fellow Boston resident and retarded human, Ben Affleck." (grasps Damon by forearms, rips arms off). "The Academy is pleased to present to you the one, the armless, the mortally wounded...MATT DAMON. Please, humans, applaud this mutation."

Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:12 PM (Bdeb0)

146 but rather "a bunch of huge celebs, something 'SNL' style, and buzzy people

-------

How about Kevin Spacey, Harvey Weinstein, Matt Lauer, James Franco, Louis C.K., and Russell Simmons?

They're big stars, and very "buzzy."

Unfortunately, Cosby is unavailable for the time being.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 11, 2018 12:12 PM (AzW6q)

147 121 6 Why don't they ask Trump to host?
C'mon. You know he'd do it.
Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 11:56 AM (NFEMn)

They know he'd steal the show. It'd be like a rally, with anti-matter.
Posted by: Roy at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (9rXxD)

-----------------

They won't do it, because they know President Trump would pull in ratings far beyond what they've had in prior years. These people can't be shamed, but they hate being embarrassed.

Posted by: Blake - tis the season for grinching at December 11, 2018 12:12 PM (qC1Sy)

148 Let xhe who is without old racist tweets open the first envelope...

Posted by: Who is broseidon, semi-official komodo dragon shifter? at December 11, 2018 12:12 PM (oZ6kz)

149 Linda Sarsour.

Posted by: The ARC of History at December 11, 2018 12:12 PM (TEv5V)

150 Tommy Wiseau! "Oh, hai, Academy!"

Maybe President I'm a Tariff Man and the Academy should work together, find that "synergy" in their respective searches for a Chief of Staff and a host.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at December 11, 2018 12:12 PM (hqZPQ)

151 126 Would not surprise me at all if the SCOAMF ends up doing it.


Posted by: davidt at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (jGvbj)

Dear Lord. You're right. I can absolutely see he or Mooch doing it.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (ptqGC)

The winner in the category of the best movie of the year about me is...

Posted by: Northernlurker, but call me Teem at December 11, 2018 12:12 PM (MkcN1)

152
Bob Mueller.

Since everyone on the Left thinks he's such a superhero anyway...

____

Hey, he was my best bud too!

Well, until he had me taken care of. I hate rats that don't stay bought.

Posted by: Whitey Bulger at December 11, 2018 12:12 PM (eSx+E)

153 >>>58 TONIGHT:

NPC Hosts THE OSCARS
Posted by: garrett

...

an animated NPC host would be perfect.

Posted by: ace at December 11, 2018 12:12 PM (PbpT7)

154 Never saw anything like this...pelosi and that fuck schumer is fighting with PDT on TV...

We are now officially a banana repubnlic

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (bim/x)

155 Joe Rogan? He did rid us of the joke thief Carlos Mencia and his podcast is pretty entertaining.

Posted by: Augustine at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (BDZWU)

156 Bob Hope hologram?

Posted by: Regular joe at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (cZlKA)

157 A Mohammed impersonator would be a novel touch.

Posted by: Furious George at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (9vQJW)

158 Nancy Lugosi and Schmuck Schumer at the White House right now. Nancy wants President Eisenhower to know her position on a government shutdown

Posted by: TheQuietMan at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (OLCnA)

159 It's sort of the left's own version of Revelations: And there was much wailing and anguish, and many voices called out "Who is pure enough to read from the script?" Only in this case, they don't have anyone who is. I say they just bring back Harvey Weinstein for one last go.

Posted by: Advo at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (ekVHT)

160 "You mean the Xinhua news network AI newsface, or are we talking about some AI waifu hologram?

Posted by: Kindltot at December 11, 2018 12:11 PM (mUa7G) "

Please welcome your new Oscars host, Hatsune Miku!

Posted by: Who is broseidon, semi-official komodo dragon shifter? at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (oZ6kz)

161 Let's just cut to the chase and FINISH the Oscars.

Joy Behar.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (ptqGC)

162 What about the Black Panther guy? Surely someone that virtuous and noble wouldn't have joked about cross-dressers or anal sex.

Heck, do they even have inappropriate jokes in Wakanda?

Posted by: Moron Robbie - Thoughts and prayers, RBG at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (aTcbm)

163 Did you know that the Oscar was named after Oscar the Grouch?

Posted by: Little Lupe at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (vtcmf)

164 Silent Bob?

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (4PPA2)

165 154 Never saw anything like this...pelosi and that fuck schumer is fighting with PDT on TV...


He should have them arrested

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (O2RFr)

166 116
Would not surprise me at all if the SCOAMF ends up doing it.


Posted by: davidt at December 11, 2018 12:09 PM (jGvbj)

They could use a Hillbilly Bear for all i care, dammit. Put me in!

Posted by: Oscar the Grouch at December 11, 2018 12:14 PM (w1aEd)

167 I don't watch movies or the Oscars.


Why would I fund the political left?

That's exactly what you're doing, when you support Hollywood products.

Posted by: Ha at December 11, 2018 12:14 PM (MAstk)

168 Bill Hader would be pretty good...not sure if his Q score is up there, but he can nail impressions and he has an appreciation for classic film.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at December 11, 2018 12:14 PM (hqZPQ)

169 Farrakhan is open that night.

Posted by: Roy at December 11, 2018 12:14 PM (9rXxD)

170 You mean the Xinhua news network AI newsface, or are we talking about some AI waifu hologram?"

WGN Chicago, 1987.

Posted by: Anon a mouse at December 11, 2018 12:14 PM (6qErC)

171 Hatsume Miku as host, well that would be one way of killing off all the Weebos, they would "squee!" to death.

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:14 PM (4PPA2)

172 161 Let's just cut to the chase and FINISH the Oscars.

Joy Behar.

And Whoopie Goldberg can co-host

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:14 PM (O2RFr)

173 all the Hollywood awards shows should go totally CGI; no host, no
guests, no audience; all computer generated graphics. Cartoons, in other
words, or anime if you prefer.

Woohoo!!!

Posted by: Kurt von Eichenwald at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (Evws/)

174 Let's just have Civil War 2 now and get it over with

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (bim/x)

175 President Macron of France will likely have some free time soon.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Ho Ho Ho! Red Faced Rants are In at The Outrage Outlet! at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (hLRSq)

176 Trey Parker and Matt Stone?

Posted by: Augustine at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (BDZWU)

177 How about a Hawaiian judge to host it and when he opens the envelope says, He won't allow the winner and picks his own winner totally at random

Posted by: TheQuietMan at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (OLCnA)

178 schumer now just insulted north dokata

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (bim/x)

179 There are plenty of attractive pr0nstars who'd love the, uh, the exposure.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (wQDH5)

180 Please welcome your new Oscars host, Hatsune Miku!

Posted by: Who is broseidon, semi-official komodo dragon shifter? at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (oZ6kz


Heh. Got Leek?

Posted by: Oscar the Grouch at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (w1aEd)

181 Why don't they ask Trump to host?
C'mon. You know he'd do it.
Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 11:56 AM (NFEMn)

They know he'd steal the show. It'd be like a rally, with anti-matter.
Posted by: Roy at December 11, 2018 12:10 PM (9rXxD)

Trump: "And now. to present the award for best actor, he was the star of such classics as "Raging Bull", "Taxi Driver" and "Goodfellas." Please welcome Low IQ, Robert DeNiro!! And he's got a very low IQ, believe me."

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (NFEMn)

182 Who won best picture last year? Serious question. I don't know.

Posted by: tu3031 at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (sf1AO)

183 anyone besides me watching Trump with Schumer and Pelosi? He's doing a pretty good job of not taking much crap from those two.

Posted by: mallfly the Georgia Peach at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (ZqRa6)

184 I am the event host you're looking for!

Posted by: zombie Otoya Yamaguchi at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (AzW6q)

185 Good grief. Pelosi just said, "We came here in good faith...."

PDT is having none of it.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (ptqGC)

186


A Mohammed impersonator would be a novel touch.


*sigh* I sure miss Hadji the Muslim Comic.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:16 PM (HaL55)

187 "A Johnny Carson or Bob Hope hologram is as good an idea as anything.... "

Bob Hope made a joke about getting out of California before they made gay sex mandatory, so he's out.

Posted by: Rob Crawford at December 11, 2018 12:16 PM (CMa7E)

188 Trump: "And now. to present the award for best actor, he was the star of such classics as "Raging Bull", "Taxi Driver" and "Goodfellas." Please welcome Low IQ, Robert DeNiro!! And he's got a very low IQ, believe me."

I just spit coffee on my screen... LOL

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:16 PM (O2RFr)

189 Semi-related.

The Politically Correct Baby It's Cold Outside:

https://bit.ly/2Ep1L6z

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at December 11, 2018 12:16 PM (+y/Ru)

190 A Mohammed impersonator would be a novel touch.



Posted by: Furious George at December 11, 2018 12:13 PM (9vQJW)


"And let's have a big hand for our guest hosts, the misunderstood lads of ISIS!"

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Ho Ho Ho! Red Faced Rants are In at The Outrage Outlet! at December 11, 2018 12:16 PM (hLRSq)

191 And Bob Hope called Democrats zombies.

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:16 PM (4PPA2)

192 I'll do it!

Posted by: Godzirra at December 11, 2018 12:16 PM (sf1AO)

193 I like he didn't apologize at first but then, like everyone else, he did seem to cuck it up

Posted by: billionaires! At the bottom of it all! at December 11, 2018 12:16 PM (7J5t2)

194
182 Who won best picture last year? Serious question. I don't know.
Posted by: tu3031 at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (sf1AO)

Going by my memory from the last time I watched it, E.T.

Posted by: AlaBAMA at December 11, 2018 12:16 PM (pUDQf)

195 My mouth is hanging open at the behavior of Pelosi and Schumer with Trump. There is absolutely no respect and it's embarrassing.

Posted by: StellasTwoCents at December 11, 2018 12:17 PM (Z0huu)

196 182 Who won best picture last year? Serious question. I don't know. Posted by: tu3031 at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (sf1AO)

Tom Six, for his groundbreaking tour de force, "The Human Centipede."

Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:17 PM (Bdeb0)

197 Good grief. Pelosi just said, "We came here in good faith...."

Sure Nan... That's why you've been waving impeachment at the President... Good faith

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:17 PM (O2RFr)

198
My mouth is hanging open at the behavior of Pelosi and Schumer with
Trump. There is absolutely no respect and it's embarrassing.

Posted by: StellasTwoCents at December 11, 2018 12:17 PM (Z0huu)


I know. Unreal.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:17 PM (ptqGC)

199 The Tag Team of Comic Destruction would have been Don Rickles and Donald Trump.

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:17 PM (4PPA2)

200 My prediction is that anyone who steps up to host will immediately have 4chan sifting his or her online past to condemn it for badthought/badspeech

Posted by: Kindltot at December 11, 2018 12:18 PM (mUa7G)

201 And the award for Best Costume Design goes to....

I have 4 individuals willing to sign affidavits that Individual 1 paid off my client to cover for an illicit Russian urine hooker affair, and don't think I've forgotten about you, Judge Boof! Donate to my #TheFight PAC so I can hit back ever harder next time!

Posted by: Michael Avenatti - Where's my Ferrari? at December 11, 2018 12:18 PM (oZ6kz)

202 196 182 Who won best picture last year? Serious question. I don't know. Posted by: tu3031 at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (sf1AO)

Tom Six, for his groundbreaking tour de force, "The Human Centipede."
Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:17 PM

*
*
Wasn't it The Shape of Water? A very good SF idea, but somehow it didn't seem to work on screen.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:18 PM (wQDH5)

203 My mouth is hanging open at the behavior of Pelosi and Schumer with Trump. There is absolutely no respect and it's embarrassing.
Posted by: StellasTwoCents at December 11, 2018 12:17 PM (Z0huu)

banana republic baby

what a disgrace

I wish PDT just punches him in the mouth

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:18 PM (bim/x)

204 OT but probably in a discussion later today: The media is so trying to make khassoggi happen that they made him Man of the Year.

Sure, they lummped him in with other journalists but FUCKING A the media is really trying to make Iran happen and get us to break up with Saudi Arabia.

see also Krugman's new axis of evil.

Posted by: billionaires! At the bottom of it all! at December 11, 2018 12:18 PM (7J5t2)

205 My mouth is hanging open at the behavior of Pelosi and Schumer with Trump. There is absolutely no respect and it's embarrassing.
Posted by: StellasTwoCents at December 11, 2018 12:17 PM (Z0huu)

------

Honestly, it's refreshing. They simulated comity with other (R) Presidents, largely because it was a carrot-and-stick bullying situation.

This guy, they just hate right out in the open.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 11, 2018 12:18 PM (AzW6q)

206

I have an idea.

Have Bryan Singer host it, and while he's giving a monologue, he can have four or five young boys fellate him, including the young boy they got to play Freddie Mercury.

It would be fitting.

Posted by: Rev Dr E Buzz Raniere at December 11, 2018 12:18 PM (z8c2c)

207 Trump is having none of what Pelosi and Schemer are offering. He's a street fighter. Love it.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:18 PM (ptqGC)

208 Are you now, or have you ever been...


a guy who told homo jokes?

Posted by: eleven at December 11, 2018 12:18 PM (NLLmE)

209 Going by my memory from the last time I watched it, E.T."

Here, have some Reese's Pieces.

Posted by: Anon a mouse at December 11, 2018 12:18 PM (6qErC)

210 Trump owning Schumer

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (NFEMn)

211 What won last year?

I think it was the movie in which the Creature from the Black Lagoon got lucky with a human woman.

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (4PPA2)

212
Bob Mueller.

everyone on the Left thinks he's such a superhero anyway...


With Christine Blasey Ford co-hosting.

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (TAmPV)

213 195 My mouth is hanging open at the behavior of Pelosi and Schumer with Trump. There is absolutely no respect and it's embarrassing.

===

is there a joint presser?

Posted by: billionaires! At the bottom of it all! at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (7J5t2)

214 Trump just threw down the gauntlet and said if he doesn't get his wall he will shut the government down and take the blame.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (/tuJf)

215 Oh this meeting is off to a roaring start LOL

They do hate each other.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (bim/x)

216 Hanna Gadsby can host with here edgy anti-comedy routine, and then Sandra Fluke can pop up after every un-joke and say 'That's not funny".

Posted by: motionview at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (pYQR/)

217 Larry David would be pretty pretty pretty pretty good...

Posted by: Augustine at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (BDZWU)

218 Best Picture last year was "MILF Diaries 15," some of my client's best work. Riveting cinematography.

Posted by: Michael Avenatti - Where's my Ferrari? at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (oZ6kz)

219 >>Wasn't it The Shape of Water? A very good SF idea, but somehow it didn't seem to work on screen.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:18 PM (wQDH5)

I don't know. I was kidding. The Human Centipede is about sewing humans together in a chain. The Shape of Water is about...well, see me at 61.

Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (Bdeb0)

220 214 Trump just threw down the gauntlet and said if he doesn't get his wall he will shut the government down and take the blame.

He'd get the blame anyway so...

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (O2RFr)

221
"Hello. Welcome to the Oscars. I am glad you were able to make it here. The traffic is so bad, how bad was it, it was so bad that many people could not make it here. Yesterday, I went to my barber, and I said just a little bit off the top. I'm kidding. I am a robot. I don't have any hair. Tonight we celebrate the accomplishments of humans..."
Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:00 PM (Bdeb0)
---------

Okay. THESE Oscars I would watch. Well done, Zod.

Posted by: bluebell at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (U5tDi)

222 Trump just threw down the gauntlet and said if he doesn't get his wall he will shut the government down and take the blame.
Posted by: JackStraw at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (/tuJf)

Good. I hope he stands his ground

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (bim/x)

223 My mouth is hanging open at the behavior of Pelosi and Schumer with Trump. There is absolutely no respect and it's embarrassing.

Posted by: StellasTwoCents at December 11, 2018 12:17 PM (Z0huu)


They see prey. In the Poker Biz, this is called a Tell.

Posted by: B.Eadie at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (e8bkP)

224 I think Barack would be especially suited for this gig, because the Oscars have become nothing more than a self-aggrandizing love fest, and we all know how much Barack loves himself.

Posted by: Blake - tis the season for grinching at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (qC1Sy)

And to enhance their divinity, BO can come out as a gay Asian, Moochelle can come out as a Hispanic man, and she can fist BO on national television. The SJW's will love it!

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (3sjI6)

225 The Academy Awards are soooooo gay

Posted by: Kevin Hart at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (Z216Q)

226 Pelosi just said, "We came here in good faith...."

Hah! That's what we used to tell them before they were either capped in the back of the head or marched off to Siberia. If they were lucky.

Posted by: Zombie Uncle Joe Stalin at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (vtcmf)

227
Trump just threw down the gauntlet and said if he doesn't get his wall he will shut the government down and take the blame.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (/tuJf)


That meeting took place earlier, and Pelosi didn't want it to be seen! Now we know why.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (ptqGC)

228 Trump should hire Pelosi as his chief of staff.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (hqZPQ)

229 >>214 Trump just threw down the gauntlet and said if he doesn't get his wall he will shut the government down and take the blame.
Posted by: JackStraw at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (/tuJf)

Zod wagers your kidney against Kyrsten Sinema's that this will not occur.

Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (Bdeb0)

230 With Christina Blasey Ford co-hosting.



And the winner is....I don't remember

Posted by: TheQuietMan at December 11, 2018 12:21 PM (OLCnA)

231 They should just have Ellen Degeniris as permanent host.


She's perfect for that. Safe lesbian who isn't funny and everybody loves.

Posted by: eleven at December 11, 2018 12:21 PM (NLLmE)

232 They asked Zombie Farfur Mouse but he wants to kill all the Joooos in the world including woke Hollywood ones so he's off the 'A' list for now anyway.

Posted by: andycanuck at December 11, 2018 12:21 PM (Evws/)

233 Baby, it really is cold outside. Not kidding.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, moar coffee at December 11, 2018 12:21 PM (Z216Q)

234 Go Trump go!

Posted by: Someguy at December 11, 2018 12:21 PM (h5Df3)

235 It's sad to think our only way out of this madness is if enough blacks wake up and discover they have been pushed way down on the victim totem pole.

To me, I think this situation is awesome.

We have minority feminists verbally abusing and trying to drive out white feminists who desperately crave their approval and acceptance.

Now we have gay white guys driving out blacks for some off color tweet or joke about sodomy, dredged up from a decade ago.

I hope these leftist pieces of shit all devour each other. I really don't care if some asshole who was probably going to tell a string of Trump jokes on a show I never watch got so much backlash that he decided it wasn't worth it.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at December 11, 2018 12:21 PM (/qEW2)

236 They're probably "considering" this because, due to #WokeStasi political purges, No one in their g****** right mind would put himself through the Struggle Session Gauntlet of just going on TV and telling terrible, terrible jokes.


I'm thinking it's not that no one would put themselves through it. I think it's the fact that all their sufficiently "woke" candidates have actually done and said far worse shit than Kevin Hart's silly little jokes that they have decided are unacceptable. If you can't let him host, then who will you have?

Posted by: buzzion at December 11, 2018 12:21 PM (cAnNx)

237 Maria Barf thinks Pelosi was great

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:21 PM (NFEMn)

238 We think that we may have Joan Rivers ready...Igor's working on her now.

Posted by: Dr. Victor Frankenstein at December 11, 2018 12:22 PM (Z04f8)

239 Good G-D half with is on....just one big titted left wing talking machine

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:22 PM (bim/x)

240 Marie Harf is saying they (Piglosi and Schemer) "stood up to the president."

She's such a hairball.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:22 PM (ptqGC)

241 I don't remember the last time I watched the oscars. late 70's maybe that would make me 10 or 12 years old. I might have watched parts of the show in the 80's. Now you could not bribe me to watch without some pricey bourbon; lots of it. Fuck Hollywood.

Posted by: USNtakim profoundly deplorable. at December 11, 2018 12:22 PM (0OmEj)

242 No Oscar Host should be Man of the Year.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at December 11, 2018 12:22 PM (1ISKN)

243 Kathy the Griffin is looking for work. She can do a ventriloquist bit using a severed Trump head puppet.

Posted by: Oscar the Grouch at December 11, 2018 12:22 PM (w1aEd)

244 From last thread, I won't make this a habit but it deserves eyeballs and ear...balls. Or something!

185 179 I don't know how many folks here are Razorfist fans, some I think.

He's got a very serious video up today, morons might wanna take a look at it. https://www.youtube.com/

watch?v=ZlhSTnM3IfE

remove space

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at December 11, 2018 12:22 PM (xJa6I)

245 I agree with Ace that this looks fucking awful after having the #Oscars So White 2 or 3 years ago and here they are flailing another successful black man for not allowing himself to be gelded. Cause verbally castrating black men is so woke

The article stated that they couldn't believe he wouldn't let himself be used as an example. The same industry that chewed through and spit out hundreds of thousands of women over years by turning the casting process into a Sexual Hunger Games? Where the industry was just a pseudo brothel/rape factory? And they have the gall to lecture someone over their tweets?
Yep, fuck em. Fuck em all. They were too stupid to understand that they needed Kevin Hart more than he needed them. It used to be an honor to be a host, to know you were accepted as part of an elite group. Now, no one with any level of character would want to be associated with them.

Posted by: TheBriBear at December 11, 2018 12:22 PM (DVQzk)

246 Hey a hairball is more useful than Harf...

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:22 PM (4PPA2)

247 I hope these leftist pieces of shit all devour each other. I really don't care if some asshole who was probably going to tell a string of Trump jokes on a show I never watch got so much backlash that he decided it wasn't worth it.
Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear

And we could all watch Sir Michael Caine sitting there laughing at all of them.

Posted by: Dr. Victor Frankenstein at December 11, 2018 12:23 PM (Z04f8)

248 Surely the Iranian government can make an official available.

They can execute five homosexuals on-stage as part of the entertainment.

Posted by: The ARC of History at December 11, 2018 12:23 PM (TEv5V)

249 Hillary Clinton can free some time from her epic stadium tour. And she is funny! "Like with a cloth?" HAHAHAHAHAHA!! Boy! that really was a knee-slapper!

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Ho Ho Ho! Red Faced Rants are In at The Outrage Outlet! at December 11, 2018 12:23 PM (hLRSq)

250 They will ask Rue Paul. You just watch.
Posted by: AlaBAMA at December 11, 2018 12:00 PM (pUDQf)

And here I was just thinking they won't be nearly Woke enough unless a transgender Of Color is doing it.

Posted by: Satan at December 11, 2018 12:23 PM (7PLM4)

251 212


Bob Mueller.



everyone on the Left thinks he's such a superhero anyway...





With Christine Blasey Ford co-hosting.





Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at December 11, 2018 12:19 PM (TAmPV)


I swear I say Blasey Ford on TV last night pitching antischizophreania medicine.


Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at December 11, 2018 12:23 PM (ymnmz)

252 They should just name Lena Dunham as Oscars Hostess-for-Life. She could be Brave! and Strong! and Body-Positive! and host in the buff. So woke! So aware! So socially just!

Problems solved!

Posted by: Stu-22 at December 11, 2018 12:23 PM (1RoAT)

253 How about the black guy who did all the noises in Police Academy?

He'd be a good chief of staff too.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (hqZPQ)

254 That meeting took place earlier, and Pelosi didn't want it to be seen! Now we know why.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:20 PM (ptqGC)

She looked like a frazzled grandmother with a boob job who is in over her head.

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (NFEMn)

255 >>235 It's sad to think our only way out of this madness is if enough blacks wake up and discover they have been pushed way down on the victim totem pole. To me, I think this situation is awesome.

Charles Manson also saw this as a favorable outcome.

Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (Bdeb0)

256 What is this "Oscars" of which you speak? Never heard of him...

Posted by: Timon at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (dKm4U)

257 I don't know how many folks here are Razorfist fans, some I think.

He's got a very serious video up today, morons might wanna take a look at it. https://www.youtube.com/

watch?v=ZlhSTnM3IfE

remove space

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at December 11, 2018 12:22 PM (xJa6I)
---------

Didn't he post here in the comments a few months ago, linking his most recent video?

I remember watching it and thinking this is what Berserker must be like in real life.

Posted by: bluebell at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (U5tDi)

258 They can execute five homosexuals on-stage as part of the entertainment.

Followed by John Kerry explaining why the Iranian Deal was the greatest agreement in the history of the United States.

Posted by: The ARC of History at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (TEv5V)

259 nobody watches the "Oscars" anyway. They are only useful for examining in the papers the next day to see which movies won so you will know to avoid those.

Posted by: Vic We Have No Party at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (mpXpK)

260 Well Pelosi is a boob-job....

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (4PPA2)

261 They will ask Rue Paul. You just watch.
Posted by: AlaBAMA at December 11, 2018 12:00 PM (pUDQf)

And here I was just thinking they won't be nearly Woke enough unless a transgender Of Color is doing it.
Posted by: Satan at December 11, 2018 12:23 PM (7PLM4)

-------

I mentioned upthread that RuPaul is radioactive with the transsexual/species/whatevers. He said he wouldn't let them on his show.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (AzW6q)

262 Hollywood has lost most of the American public anyway. Nobody wants to watch these people felate each other and make ad nauseum political statements about the president.

I would rather burn my eyes out with a hot poker or juggle flaming bowling pins in a pool of gasoline.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (VpIIl)

263


Hey a hairball is more useful than Harf...


Gnurr is smarter than she is.

I'd hit it, though. She'd only need two glasses of wine, looks like.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:25 PM (HaL55)

264 WHAT ABOUT ME!?! I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING!!! YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES!!!

Posted by: Rosie O'Donnell at December 11, 2018 12:25 PM (sf1AO)

265 >>Zod wagers your kidney against Kyrsten Sinema's that this will not occur.

I'm kind of attached to my kidney. Bofa dem.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 11, 2018 12:25 PM (/tuJf)

266 -
--
She looked like a frazzled grandmother with a boob job who is in over her head.

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM

--------------------------------------------------------

The boobs over her head thing is from too many subsequent face lifts.

Posted by: irright at December 11, 2018 12:25 PM (pMGkg)

267 BTW under no modern circumstance should Kimmel and Letterman pass the #Meetoo standard exclusion clause.



Don't know much about Stewart. I think he might be an antisemite or something, I mean Stewart it just sounds antisemitic. Ami Right? (looks at camera and makes a face)

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at December 11, 2018 12:25 PM (ymnmz)

268 What about Jim Gaffigan? He may be a straight white male, but he's genuinely funny in an inoffensive, self deprecating way. Maybe he could ghost write a monologue for some unknown black guy.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at December 11, 2018 12:25 PM (/qEW2)

269 Please welcome your new Oscars host, Hatsune Miku!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSyWtESoeOc

The fans love her!

Posted by: Lutz Les Maas at December 11, 2018 12:25 PM (hrcfq)

270 How about a virtual Humphrey Bogart?

"Yeah. I said some pretty rough things once upon a time. That was then, this is now. Pull up your big boy pants and get over it. The Oscar nominees for the Best Actor in a Motion Picture are . . ."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:25 PM (wQDH5)

271 265 >>Zod wagers your kidney against Kyrsten Sinema's that this will not occur.

I'm kind of attached to my kidney. Bofa dem.
Posted by: JackStraw at December 11, 2018 12:25 PM (/tuJf)

Haven't see 'bofa' in a while. Way to keep it alive, Jack.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at December 11, 2018 12:26 PM (xJa6I)

272 What is this "Oscars" of which you speak? Never heard of him...


Posted by: Timon at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (dKm4U)


He was a balding guy, worked with the six million dollar man.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Ho Ho Ho! Red Faced Rants are In at The Outrage Outlet! at December 11, 2018 12:26 PM (hLRSq)

273 No love for Brian Stetler?

Posted by: Duncanthrax at December 11, 2018 12:26 PM (ctuyM)

274 i can't watch the shitshow, but, it seems as if trump is putting the democrat leadership on display for the world to see. the only thing that would be better is if they would bring mueller out and fuck him sideways up his ass with a nuke. i'd watch that.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at December 11, 2018 12:26 PM (KP5rU)

275 How about this blast from the past? I hear Margaret Cho is available...

Posted by: Timon at December 11, 2018 12:26 PM (dKm4U)

276 I'm ready for my close up. No, the other kind.

Posted by: The ficus at December 11, 2018 12:26 PM (Z04f8)

277 Thought Razor Fist did a good job in Guardians of the Galaxy II.

Posted by: B.Eadie at December 11, 2018 12:26 PM (e8bkP)

278 They should ask Kid Rock.
I'd watch that.

Posted by: sherlockzz at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM (oG/ns)

279 Maybe they can get one of those movie dogs and do a voice over. Because trained animals have more appeal than these losers.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM (VpIIl)

280 Tanned Rested Ready!

Posted by: Kathy Griffin's saggy butt cheeks at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM (ymnmz)

281 Vic Hitler

Posted by: x at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM (nFwvY)

282 Marie Harf is saying they (Piglosi and Schemer) "stood up to the president."

Whoa, they must have done really bad then...

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM (O2RFr)

283 $5 billion for a wall that's estimated to cost $15-25 billion, and the Democrats will accede to $1.3 billion. Have I got those figures about right?

Posted by: Zod at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM (Bdeb0)

284 Some brave soul needs to compile an Oscar Highlights video. All the sideboob, nipslips, and the odd funny or embarrassing joke. Should be able to pare it down to about five minutes.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM (fDU8w)

285 Now Chuck and Nancy live outside WH...

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM (NFEMn)

286 How about Max Headroom?

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM (H7LIz)

287

nobody watches the "Oscars" anyway. They are only useful for examining
in the papers the next day to see which movies won so you will know to
avoid those.


Sorta like the Grammy's. They died when they gave TFG one back in '08 to go along with his Nobel for breathing.


I just check the results to see who got the Best Blues award and that's it.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM (HaL55)

288 How about David Hogg? We haven't heard anything from him in a while. He's probably available.

Posted by: bluebell at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (U5tDi)

289 Whenever I see stories like this, I think back to Bruno Kirby's character in "Good Morning Vietnam" that explains to Adrian Cronauer what comedy is.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper, nee MrCaniac at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (fdTrp)

290 I hate schummer with the heat of a thousand suns...wish he werenot joooooish

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (bim/x)

291 They should get a sex bot to host.

Dress it up in a #METOO shirt.

Posted by: Roland THTG at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (88+cf)

292 I mentioned upthread that RuPaul is radioactive with the transsexual/species/whatevers. He said he wouldn't let them on his show.
Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (AzW6q)

Off Satan sock.

Well, here's a phrase I never thought I'd type in my life-- Good job, RuPaul.

Posted by: Vanya at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (7PLM4)

293 I'm radioactive, and I still get work. Send me in!

Posted by: Godzilla at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (Z04f8)

294 257 I don't know how many folks here are Razorfist fans, some I think.

He's got a very serious video up today, morons might wanna take a look at it. https://www.youtube.com/

watch?v=ZlhSTnM3IfE

remove space

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at December 11, 2018 12:22 PM (xJa6I)
---------

Didn't he post here in the comments a few months ago, linking his most recent video?

I remember watching it and thinking this is what Berserker must be like in real life.
Posted by: bluebell at December 11, 2018 12:24 PM (U5tDi)

Has he posted here? I wasn't aware that he was aware of the horde.

I suspect he, Berserker, ScoggDog and some others would rock out to the same righteous tunes.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (xJa6I)

295 275
How about this blast from the past? I hear Margaret Cho is available...


Posted by: Timon at December 11, 2018 12:26 PM (dKm4U


Maybe we could do a three way with Rosie O'Donnell.

Posted by: Kathy Griffin's saggy butt cheeks at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (ymnmz)

296 Breaking news from Newsweek!

Newsweek
@Newsweek
Is Rudy Giuliani a leaker? Trump's lawyer fingered by James Comey

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (+y/Ru)

297 Chuckie Schemer beat feet to the nearest mic.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (ptqGC)

298 277 Thought Razor Fist did a good job in Guardians of the Galaxy II.
Posted by: B.Eadie at December 11, 2018

*
*
Have Chris Pratt and Bryce Dallas Howard alternate as hosts. With a couple of CGI velociraptors to liven things up.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (wQDH5)

299 My vote is for Ozzy Osbourne. He would probably be so wasted it would be hilarious. Plenty of F-bombs and all that. I would watch that, it would be a train wreck with rock n roll.

Posted by: Marcus T at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (VpIIl)

300 How to kill the Academy Awards by turning Japanese...

https://youtu.be/yzC4hFK5P3g

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (4PPA2)

301 Now Chuck and Nancy live outside WH...

Nancy is questionable on the "live" thing

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (O2RFr)

302 maxine waters would be the best host for the oscars. or, the homeless crackhead who lives on the corner of hollywood and vine.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (KP5rU)

303 Don't tell me the Left ruined something again.

At least they ruined something already no good and useless this time.

Posted by: Avenger at December 11, 2018 12:29 PM (70ScF)

304 Because trained animals have more appeal than these losers.
Posted by: Marcus T at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM


Are you referring to potential Oscar hosts/hostesses, Schumer/Pelosi, or the GOPe?

Posted by: Duncanthrax at December 11, 2018 12:29 PM (ctuyM)

305 maxine waters would be the best host for the oscars. or, the homeless crackhead who lives on the corner of hollywood and vine.
Posted by: chavez the hugo at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (KP5rU)

Same person no?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:29 PM (bim/x)

306 Chuck is talking shit, but it doesn't look like he's confident.
No mugging for the camera.

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:29 PM (NFEMn)

307 Marie Harf is saying they (Piglosi and Schemer) "stood up to the president."

Whoa, they must have done really bad then...


Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:27 PM (O2RFr)


They stood up to him? So that meant he was in charge and they were playing defense. You know, that does not bode well for the Democrats running things the way their fanboys dream.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Ho Ho Ho! Red Faced Rants are In at The Outrage Outlet! at December 11, 2018 12:29 PM (hLRSq)

308 No love for Brian Stetler?
Posted by: Duncanthrax at December 11, 2018 12:26 PM (ctuyM)


Guy can do Rockabilly ... Swing ... Dude is a Virtual Wall of Sound in a three piece band.

Posted by: B.Eadie at December 11, 2018 12:29 PM (e8bkP)

309 Maybe Eddie Murphy could host and rehash his classic "Honeymooners" monologue.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at December 11, 2018 12:29 PM (/qEW2)

310

The boobs over her head thing is from too many subsequent face lifts.

That's not a goatee, either.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:30 PM (HaL55)

311 Shut the fuckin gov down..And THIS time NO back pay. You no workie, you never get payiied

MOst of the gov is worthless

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:30 PM (bim/x)

312 Illegal immigrant Senor Wences.

'sallriiight.....

Posted by: Miklos, thanking all the little people at December 11, 2018 12:30 PM (zCyNd)

313 168
Bill Hader would be pretty good...not sure if his Q score is up there,
but he can nail impressions and he has an appreciation for classic film.



Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at December 11, 2018 12:14 PM (hqZPQ)

176
Trey Parker and Matt Stone?

Posted by: Augustine at December 11, 2018 12:15 PM (BDZWU)


All three are part of "South Park" so I doubt the Hollywood scolds want any part of them.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper, nee MrCaniac at December 11, 2018 12:30 PM (fdTrp)

314 I have a vision of Trump building the wall and using Chuck and Nancy as mortar.

It's a nice vision.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 11, 2018 12:30 PM (/tuJf)

315 Lol. Schemer saying PDT threw a temper tantrum. Um, no Chuckie. That would be you and Madame Dementia.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:30 PM (ptqGC)

316 195 My mouth is hanging open at the behavior of Pelosi and Schumer with Trump. There is absolutely no respect and it's embarrassing.

Posted by: StellasTwoCents at December 11, 2018 12:17 PM (Z0huu)

Honestly... I can see why the President is letting the crazy hang out, but I think less of him for not having his security enforce politeness when the POTUS is talking. Like The West Wing.

Then again, he gives as good as he gets, so who knows? This thing won't be decided by fixed elections anyways.

Posted by: trev006 at December 11, 2018 12:30 PM (qqEFK)

317 279 Maybe they can get one of those movie dogs and do a voice over. Because trained animals have more appeal than these losers.
Posted by: Marcus T at December 11, 2018

*
*
Lassie and Rin Tin Tin, plus the 2 dogs and the Siamese cat from The Incredible Journey.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:30 PM (wQDH5)

318 Newsweek
@Newsweek
Is Rudy Giuliani a leaker? Trump's lawyer fingered by James Comey
Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (+y/Ru)

Comey gave Rudy a prostate exam??? Talk about Deep State.

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:30 PM (NFEMn)

319
Marie Harf is saying they (Piglosi and Schemer) "stood up to the president."


The bar has really dropped for what democrats consider a victory

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at December 11, 2018 12:30 PM (TAmPV)

320 The more I think about it... it will be the SCOAMF.

Posted by: davidt at December 11, 2018 12:31 PM (jGvbj)

321 It is funny to watch when the left-wing master class has one of their dial-a-mobs of drooling, semi-autonomous NPC units turn on them.

We're all used to seeing it at universities for years... but in the last year, they've started to feed on the cultural elite.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 11, 2018 12:31 PM (AzW6q)

322
MOst of the gov is worthless
Posted by: Nevergiveup


Non-essential personnel.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at December 11, 2018 12:31 PM (aKsyK)

323 Marie Harf is a massive dipshit. Another great hire by Fox.
Great tits though.

Posted by: tu3031 at December 11, 2018 12:31 PM (sf1AO)

324 312 Illegal immigrant Senor Wences.

'sallriiight.....
Posted by: Miklos, thanking all the little people at December 11, 2018

*
*
"Close de door. Ees cold."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:31 PM (wQDH5)

325 "And the winner is....I don't remember"

That's my line

Posted by: Big Jim Comey, Mind like a steel trap at December 11, 2018 12:32 PM (cqNba)

326 Screw it, lets go full Dark Side.

Darth Vader to host.

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:32 PM (4PPA2)

327 315 Lol. Schemer saying PDT threw a temper tantrum. Um, no Chuckie. That would be you and Madame Dementia.

Chuckie.... Trump is the President

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:32 PM (O2RFr)

328 268
What about Jim Gaffigan? He may be a straight white male, but he's
genuinely funny in an inoffensive, self deprecating way. Maybe he could
ghost write a monologue for some unknown black guy.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at December 11, 2018 12:25 PM (/qEW2)


Ghost write and Gaffigan.

LOL

Seriously though, Gaffigan should not lend any of his imprimatur to that shitshow. it would only damage his career.

The only Modern guy I think might be up to it is the Mulaney guy. He seems to fit in with that crowd

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at December 11, 2018 12:32 PM (ymnmz)

329 Given that the black glass ceiling has already been broken with Whoopi and Chris Rock, they really don't need another black host. Maybe a Muslim host. "You say anything bad about Muhammed, I KEEL you!"

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at December 11, 2018 12:32 PM (/qEW2)

330 Has he posted here? I wasn't aware that he was aware of the horde.

I suspect he, Berserker, ScoggDog and some others would rock out to the same righteous tunes.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (xJa6I)
-------

Well, he posted with RazorFist as his nic, and said "Here's the latest video I put up" and it had something to do with the thread topic, I think.

A few people recognized his name and said hello to him and that they liked his stuff. I can't remember if he said anything else.

I watched the video and although his language is a little much for a delicate bluebell like myself, he sure seems to be on our side. I liked him. And I liked that he credited his military dad with editing his videos.

Posted by: bluebell at December 11, 2018 12:32 PM (U5tDi)

331 305; ngu. probably.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at December 11, 2018 12:32 PM (KP5rU)

332 Achmed the Dead Terrorist?

Right out.

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at December 11, 2018 12:33 PM (4PPA2)

333 Pelosi just got a dig in at Fox.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:33 PM (ptqGC)

334 Heres a test for SNL or late-night comedy, because theres about 50 or 100 or 1,000 hilarious biting incisive comedy sketches around "who's hosting the oscars"

Posted by: Truth Missile at December 11, 2018 12:33 PM (D+5jX)

335 327
315 Lol. Schemer saying PDT threw a temper tantrum. Um, no Chuckie. That would be you and Madame Dementia.



Chuckie.... Trump is the President

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:32 PM (O2RFr)



Yeesh chuckie.

Posted by: Fagan at December 11, 2018 12:33 PM (ymnmz)

336 Chuckie pissed, yelling at media, "We will only take questions on this subject."

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:33 PM (NFEMn)

337 My vote is for Ozzy Osbourne. He would probably be so wasted it would be hilarious. Plenty of F-bombs and all that. I would watch that, it would be a train wreck with rock n roll.
Posted by: Marcus T at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (VpIIl)

Concur.

"An now, we're going to give the awards... To... this next fucking category... Which is... Best support picture in actress... or something like that bollocks..."

Posted by: Vanya at December 11, 2018 12:33 PM (7PLM4)

338
I think I'm turning Japanese

Posted by: Lutz Les Maas at December 11, 2018 12:33 PM (hrcfq)

339 I have a vision of Trump building the wall and using Chuck and Nancy as mortar.

It's a nice vision.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 11, 2018 12:30 PM (/tuJf)



I look forward to the day that Schumer's severed hands are nailed to the door of the Senate.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at December 11, 2018 12:33 PM (OElGY)

340 "Good evening, I am your host Vladmir Putin, President of Russia. I shall make jokes and you shall laugh. Here is joke - you all got goody bags filled with fabulous luxurious prizes. Guess which one I lace with polonium. You should be laughing now."

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Ho Ho Ho! Red Faced Rants are In at The Outrage Outlet! at December 11, 2018 12:33 PM (hLRSq)

341 I'm pretty sure Charlie Daniel's, Lud Rock or Ted Nugent could do it. I'm sure they'd have interesting comments.

Posted by: Richard McEnroe at December 11, 2018 12:33 PM (n1b3L)

342 309
Maybe Eddie Murphy could host and rehash his classic "Honeymooners" monologue.
-------------
Or just have him show up to perform "Boogie in Your Butt" -- that'd be very appropriate to the occasion.

Posted by: Stu-22 at December 11, 2018 12:34 PM (1RoAT)

343 What is Shecky Schumer doing there? He's not running anything except his idiotic yap.

Posted by: Captain Hate at December 11, 2018 12:34 PM (y7DUB)

344 332 Achmed the Dead Terrorist?

Right out.

Perfect... And the rest of his "crew." Jalapeno on a stick would be current

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:34 PM (O2RFr)

345 I thought Max Boot was the lead guitarist for MegaMalfunction

Posted by: SMOD at December 11, 2018 12:34 PM (QkjLD)

346 329
Given that the black glass ceiling has already been broken with Whoopi
and Chris Rock, they really don't need another black host. Maybe a
Muslim host. "You say anything bad about Muhammed, I KEEL you!"

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at December 11, 2018 12:32 PM (/qEW2)


LOL

Posted by: Jeff Foxworthy at December 11, 2018 12:34 PM (ymnmz)

347 -
--

I'm homeless, I'm gay, I have AIDS, and I'm new in town.



Posted by: John Mulaney at December 11, 2018 12:34 PM (pMGkg)

348 Harris Faulkner just made a great point. Not one reporter asked Chuck and Nancy why THEY want to shut down the government.


Now Marie Harf is having a snit fit.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 11, 2018 12:34 PM (ptqGC)

349 " My vote is for Ozzy Osbourne. He would probably be so wasted it would be hilarious. Plenty of F-bombs and all that. I would watch that, it would be a train wreck with rock n roll.
Posted by: Marcus T at December 11, 2018 12:28 PM (VpIIl)

Concur. "

As long as he opens the show with Crazy Train.

Turned up to eleven.

Posted by: Big Jim Comey, Mind like a steel trap at December 11, 2018 12:34 PM (cqNba)

350 129 ... I have Hadrian's first version of the music collection. The sound quality is excellent and my new hearing aids really make that apparent. This expanded version should be terrific. I love to have it playing in the background while reading or doing other hobbies. That works fine until a passage starts that gets me singing along and/or conducting the music.


A big thanks to Hadrian for his generousity.

Posted by: JTB at December 11, 2018 12:34 PM (bmdz3)

351 They should just put the Oscars back on the radio.

Posted by: tu3031 at December 11, 2018 12:35 PM (sf1AO)

352 Even when people do read the envelopes, they still don't get it right.

Posted by: josephistan at December 11, 2018 12:35 PM (7HtZB)

353 I wish fists would fly

And Harf Wit really needs a good stooping

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:35 PM (bim/x)

354 The more I think about it... it will be the SCOAMF.
Posted by: davidt at December 11, 2018 12:31 PM (jGvbj)


Yep - it'll be a Trump Protest and Media Blitz all at once.

If I were them - that's EXACTLY what I would do.

Posted by: B.Eadie at December 11, 2018 12:35 PM (e8bkP)

355 Chuckie pissed, yelling at media, "We will only take questions on this subject."

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:33 PM (NFEMn)



Things did not go well for Madam Botox and Senator Close-Up then.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Ho Ho Ho! Red Faced Rants are In at The Outrage Outlet! at December 11, 2018 12:35 PM (hLRSq)

356 They should just have Ellen Degeniris as permanent host.

She's perfect for that. Safe lesbian who isn't funny and everybody loves.
Posted by: eleven at December 11, 2018 12:21 PM (NLLmE)

Wait, everybody loves her? I thought Oprah was the lesbian who isn't funny and everybody loves.

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at December 11, 2018 12:36 PM (3sjI6)

357 Even when people do read the envelopes, they still don't get it right.
Posted by: josephistan at December 11, 2018 12:35 PM (7HtZB)
---------

Hey! There were two names! Don't blame me!

Posted by: Steve Harvey at December 11, 2018 12:36 PM (U5tDi)

358 And why am I forgetting to change Comey socks?

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 11, 2018 12:36 PM (cqNba)

359 CNBC: Stocks turn lower as Trump clashes with Dem leaders. Orange Man Bad. Orange Man Crash Market

Posted by: TheQuietMan at December 11, 2018 12:36 PM (OLCnA)

360


"Good evening, I am your host Vladmir Putin, President of Russia. I
shall make jokes and you shall laugh. Here is joke - you all got goody
bags filled with fabulous luxurious prizes. Guess which one I lace with
polonium. You should be laughing now."



As long as I got a miniature Russian giraffe, I could die happy.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:36 PM (HaL55)

361 The president threw down the gauntlet. He won that round.
Now watch the GOPe cut him off at the knees.....

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:36 PM (NFEMn)

362 ozzy would never lower himself to that shit parade. he has standards.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at December 11, 2018 12:36 PM (KP5rU)

363 I'm sure we could find a great muslim comedian here.

https://tinyurl.com/ptx5yar

Posted by: Timon at December 11, 2018 12:36 PM (dKm4U)

364 how about Schumer and Acosta in Thunderdome, wrestling for a microphone.

Posted by: Boulder terlit hobo at December 11, 2018 12:36 PM (I92xX)

365 What's amusing about the Oscar host debacle is the SJW's can't even be blamed for ruining a fine institution. The Oscars did that all on their own.

The SJW's are merely throwing the final shovel full of dirt on the grave.

Posted by: Blake - tis the season for grinching at December 11, 2018 12:36 PM (qC1Sy)

366 Well with this little performance from Schmuckie and Piglosi we have a preview of what the next two years is going to be like.


Pretty much nothing is going to get done, which I guess is as good as we can hope for.

Posted by: Kreplach at December 11, 2018 12:37 PM (qxq6t)

367 Things did not go well for Madam Botox and Senator Close-Up then.

------

Or the Democrats have the Wall/shut-down as the only talking point that will be discussed. They're very good about message-discipline, and I'm sure this was largely scripted ahead of time.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 11, 2018 12:37 PM (AzW6q)

368 There are 434 Representatives and 100 Senators who rest easier at night knowing there is somebody, AOC, who is stupider than them.

Posted by: SMOD at December 11, 2018 12:37 PM (QkjLD)

369 Pretty much nothing is going to get done, which I guess is as good as we can hope for.
Posted by: Kreplach at December 11, 2018 12:37 PM (qxq6t)

Congress not spending my money is always good

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:37 PM (bim/x)

370 Prediction: ratings will go up. The train wreck effect.

Posted by: Max Power at December 11, 2018 12:38 PM (llxrS)

371 Barron Trump just became a Chess Grand Master

Posted by: SMOD at December 11, 2018 12:38 PM (QkjLD)

372
I suspect this is 'failure theater' designed to drum up interest in a failing who-gives-a-fvck final act.

In a time of instant access to decades of entertainment that would take decades of time to watch -- who-in-the-hell watches anything real-time anymore?

Unless it gets ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ratings I don't waste my time.

Time -- the one resource that no man can hoard.

Posted by: Nic Stealer at December 11, 2018 12:38 PM (jYje5)

373 There are 434 Representatives and 100 Senators who rest easier at night knowing there is somebody, AOC, who is stupider than them.
Posted by: SMOD at December 11, 2018 12:37 PM (QkjLD)
--------

She's only the newest, so she gets the most press. She has some pretty stiff competition though. We all know the names. Here, I'll start us off: Sheila Jackson Lee.

Posted by: bluebell at December 11, 2018 12:38 PM (U5tDi)

374 Pelosi And Schumer Absolutely Own Trump In Epic DC Showdown

Posted by: Vox at December 11, 2018 12:38 PM (sf1AO)

375 Even when people do read the envelopes, they still don't get it right.

Posted by: josephistan at December 11, 2018 12:35 PM (7HtZB)



May the bird of paradise fly up your nose....

Posted by: Karnak the Magnificent at December 11, 2018 12:39 PM (zCyNd)

376 Remember Nancy fuming during Trump's State of the Union speech?

She thinks it's payback time.

Posted by: davidt at December 11, 2018 12:39 PM (jGvbj)

377 -
--
The more I think about it... it will be the SCOAMF.

Posted by: davidt at December 11, 2018 12:31 PM (jGvbj)



Yep - it'll be a Trump Protest and Media Blitz all at once.



If I were them - that's EXACTLY what I would do.





Posted by: B.Eadie at December 11, 2018 12:35 PM

------------------------------------------------

During the show he should tell a gay joke, to test loyalties.

Posted by: irright at December 11, 2018 12:39 PM (pMGkg)

378
She's only the newest, so she gets the most press. She has some pretty stiff competition though. We all know the names. Here, I'll start us off: Sheila Jackson Lee.

What about me?

Posted by: Maxine wig hat Watters at December 11, 2018 12:39 PM (O2RFr)

379 Pretty much nothing is going to get done, which I guess is as good as we can hope for.


I can live with that.

Posted by: eleven at December 11, 2018 12:39 PM (NLLmE)

380


Even when people do read the envelopes, they still don't get it right.


"...the award for Best Understudy Gaffer/Clapper Handler in a foreign production that's not in China goes to..."

"...Hallmark!"

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:40 PM (HaL55)

381 @369

Oh they are going to spend money.


What will happen is that everything will become emergency spending/CR's/CROMNIBUS's etc.


In other words everything will become a crisis.


The next two years are going to be fucking insane.

Posted by: Kreplach at December 11, 2018 12:40 PM (qxq6t)

382 She's only the newest, so she gets the most press. She has some pretty stiff competition though. We all know the names. Here, I'll start us off: Sheila Jackson Lee.
Posted by: bluebell at December 11, 2018 12:38 PM (U5tDi)

-------

He's out now, but I always suspected Harry Reid had a sub-80 IQ.

Mad Max is dumb as a stump (and twice as ugly).

Sheldon Whitehouse is a glittering gem of ignorance.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 11, 2018 12:40 PM (AzW6q)

383 I was sort of hoping Kevin Hart would grovel and beg and plead until they 'allowed' him to proceed. Then on the night of the Oscars, he walked out on the stage at the very beginning, told them to GFY, dropped the mic and walked out.

Must See TV

Posted by: JB1000 at December 11, 2018 12:40 PM (aZ9CV)

384 Things did not go well for Madam Botox and Senator Close-Up then.
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Ho Ho Ho! Red Faced Rants are In at The Outrage Outlet! at December 11, 2018 12:35 PM (hLRSq)

And he's lying already, saying Trump "wants" a shutdown.
He didn't say that. He said he'll accept "responsibility" for a shut down if he doesn't get border sercurity...

Posted by: JoeF. at December 11, 2018 12:40 PM (NFEMn)

385 The more I think about it... it will be the SCOAMF.



Everyone will be afraid to stop applauding.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at December 11, 2018 12:40 PM (OElGY)

386 379 Pretty much nothing is going to get done, which I guess is as good as we can hope for.


I can live with that.

Me too... I don't want any "Comprehensive immigration reform " crap rammed through

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:41 PM (O2RFr)

387 We live in interesting times

Cowboy up folks

Buy more ammo

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:41 PM (bim/x)

388
And why am I forgetting to change Comey socks?


Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 11, 2018 12:36 PM (cqNba)


I might know but I can't be sure.

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at December 11, 2018 12:41 PM (TAmPV)

389 I still think Hart was treated better than a white comedian would have been in the same situation. A white guy would have been cut out immediately. Hart seems to have been told "If you ritually abase yourself, you can still host" and rejected that.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at December 11, 2018 12:41 PM (/qEW2)

390 Here, I'll start us off: Sheila Jackson Lee.
Posted by: bluebell at December 11, 2018 12:38 PM (U5tDi)


We talking pure IQ here - or low cunning ?

There is a big difference.

Posted by: B.Eadie at December 11, 2018 12:41 PM (e8bkP)

391 Posted by: Vox at December 11, 2018 12:38 PM (sf1AO)

Thanks for sharing the daily pre coordinated message by the left. Isn't it great when people agree?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 11, 2018 12:41 PM (AllCR)

392

Congress not spending my money is always good

Not passing any more laws is good, too. Each and every one reduces our freedom a little bit.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:42 PM (HaL55)

393 Oscars are triggering.....everyone should get a participation Oscar, or no one gets an Oscar.

Posted by: BignJames at December 11, 2018 12:42 PM (cxHbL)

394 Lay off 50% + of the gov and let's see how well we function...it will be a great experiment

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:42 PM (bim/x)

395 -
--

Pretty much nothing is going to get done, which I guess is as good as we can hope for.

Posted by: Kreplach at December 11, 2018 12:37 PM (qxq6t)



Congress not spending my money is always good


Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:37 PM
------------------------------

No, no. We are all in agreement that we're going to spend your money.


Posted by: Dem/Reps at December 11, 2018 12:42 PM (pMGkg)

396 Holograms.

Posted by: Can't Hang a Ghost at December 11, 2018 12:42 PM (uloIh)

397 Pretty soon I expect Pelousi to offer Schumer a fishing trip in a rowboat. He is obviously second fiddle, and by a lot.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, moar coffee at December 11, 2018 12:42 PM (Z216Q)

398 Vivian Salama [WSJ]
Incredible argument unfolding now in front of the press between trump, Pelosi and Schumer over votes for border security. Pelosi keeps asking not to discuss it in front of the press.

Posted by: andycanuck at December 11, 2018 12:43 PM (Evws/)

399 No, no. We are all in agreement that we're going to spend your money.
Posted by: Dem/Reps at December 11, 2018 12:42 PM (pMGkg)

-------

Not if Trump sticks to his guns, and vetoes. I wait with bated breath to see...

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at December 11, 2018 12:43 PM (AzW6q)

400 Okay, I'll do it.

But first, you will blow me.

Posted by: Zombie Burt Reynolds at December 11, 2018 12:43 PM (DuAZ5)

401 Hello. I'm Mr. Ed, your host for tonight's Oscar awards.

Posted by: Count de Monet at December 11, 2018 12:43 PM (QLvwG)

402

OK Hordelings, life beckons.


Y'all try to behave.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at December 11, 2018 12:43 PM (HaL55)

403 For the love of God move some of those Marines to the other side of the island!!

Posted by: Hank Johnson at December 11, 2018 12:43 PM (NF2Bf)

404
I hope there will be links posted to the Pelosi, Schummer, Trump brouhaha.

Posted by: Lutz Les Maas at December 11, 2018 12:43 PM (hrcfq)

405 I hope they don't cancel the Oscars. I'm still holding out hope that ISIS will make a cameo appearance.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at December 11, 2018 12:44 PM (YqDXo)

406 #398 It just struck me the WSJ bint didn't capitalize "trump" but did for the Dem shits.

Posted by: andycanuck at December 11, 2018 12:44 PM (Evws/)

407
I suspect TIME fake news magazine will do something similar.

Prediction: TIME fake news mag will choose either:
-- the Climate, the Earth
-- or The Fake News Media Complex

mark me words

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at December 11, 2018 12:44 PM (PtGcE)

408 It's almost like leftwingers destroy everything they touch.

Next up: Internet porn. YOU WILL BE MADE TO WATCH TRANNIES.

Posted by: "1984" - The Progressive Instruction Manual at December 11, 2018 12:44 PM (uloIh)

409 I haven't watched that fr*cken awards show in thirty years because I want them all to drop dead


okay, that came out a wee bit Harsh. Heart-felt, but a wee bit harsh

Posted by: the Man who Burps in French at December 11, 2018 12:44 PM (9HuGt)

410 Pretty much nothing is going to get done, which I guess is as good as we can hope for.

I can live with that.
Posted by: eleven at December 11, 2018 12:39 PM (NLLmE)

Well, nothing except the Wall, which the military will do and will be paid for by exiting Afghanistan.

Posted by: Anonymous White Male at December 11, 2018 12:45 PM (3sjI6)

411 Lay off 50% + of the gov and let's see how well we function...it will be a great experiment
Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:42 PM (bim/x)


When the GOP controlled only controlled three-thirds of the Fed ... they couldn't even agree to defund a dollar of NPR.

This - again - is what Poker Players call a "Tell".

Posted by: B.Eadie at December 11, 2018 12:45 PM (e8bkP)

412 @406


She's probably relying on auto-capitalization.


Trump is a dual use word so the auto-cap more than likely didn't capitalize it.

Posted by: Kreplach at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (qxq6t)

413 405 I hope they don't cancel the Oscars. I'm still holding out hope that ISIS will make a cameo appearance.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at December 11, 2018 12:44 PM (YqDXo)


Just leave Michael Caine alone. And James Woods.

Posted by: eleven at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (NLLmE)

414 Hey have a siad flake should go fuck himself lately?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (bim/x)

415 Never watch network TV, so they could shitcan the whole thing flipping thing as much as i care

Posted by: REDACTED at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (L/iaS)

416 408 It's almost like leftwingers destroy everything they touch.

Next up: Internet porn. YOU WILL BE MADE TO WATCH TRANNIES.
Posted by: "1984" - The Progressive Instruction Manual at December 11, 2018 12:44 PM (uloIh)

Don't give them ideas.

Posted by: Cato by Phone at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (J+mig)

417 Barron Trump just became a Chess Grand Master
Why? Did he just walk into the presser, point to Pelosi and say, "Daddy? Is that Stormy's mommy?"

Posted by: andycanuck at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (Evws/)

418
Why not have Bush's casket host the oscars?

Everyone seems love him.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (PtGcE)

419 I'm more than fine with shutting down the government if Chuck and Nancy won't give on the wall.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (/tuJf)

420 35 Let's be honest, the Oscars is self-indulgent crap where super rich, pampered brats pat themselves on the back for doing their damned jobs then expect us to cheer. Why its on TV to begin with baffles me.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at December 11, 2018 12:01 PM (39g3+)


Marketing ploy. That's all it is. It's Hollywood's collective sex tape that gets "stolen."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at December 11, 2018 12:47 PM (YqDXo)

421 Why not have Bush's casket host the oscars?

Everyone seems love him.
Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (PtGcE)

he can parachut in. To sson?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:47 PM (bim/x)

422 She's probably relying on auto-capitalization.


Trump is a dual use word so the auto-cap more than likely didn't capitalize it.
Posted by: Kreplach at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (qxq6t)

In other words, too fucking stupid to write plain English, despite the fact that it's her "profession".

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at December 11, 2018 12:47 PM (fDU8w)

423 What's all the drama about? What's so funny?

Oh, that's right, there is no drama worth watching and nothing funny to laugh at. That is until now, watching Hollywood go down the gurgler is pretty funny and entertaining but I suppose that was not the effect they were aiming for.

Posted by: Decaf at December 11, 2018 12:48 PM (jLBUC)

424 There were 0 good movies this year. They should just cancel the whole thing.

Posted by: America's chickennnza at December 11, 2018 12:48 PM (HqwAR)

425 Lay off 50% + of the gov and let's see how well we function...it will be a great experiment


Use the blizzard fix. If you don't show up during big snowstorms, you're self admittedly "non-essential" and your job is not needed.

Posted by: tu3031 at December 11, 2018 12:48 PM (sf1AO)

426
You see, the 'No-life's' -- this is an important concept in this day and age; people with no life to speak of, have an incredible resource in the internet, and hours and weeks to research -- will try to take down anyone and get their life somehow enhanced by that destruction.

No-life's, and low-life's taking over. Any wonder why no one is going to want to walk up to that podium?

Posted by: Nic Stealer at December 11, 2018 12:48 PM (jYje5)

427 Le NOOD

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 11, 2018 12:49 PM (cqNba)

428 373 There are 434 Representatives and 100 Senators who rest easier at night knowing there is somebody, AOC, who is stupider than them.
Posted by: SMOD at December 11, 2018 12:37 PM (QkjLD)
--------

She's only the newest, so she gets the most press. She has some pretty stiff competition though. We all know the names. Here, I'll start us off: Sheila Jackson Lee.
Posted by: bluebell at December 11, 2018

*
*
Don't forget the guy who proclaimed that Guam would tip over.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at December 11, 2018 12:49 PM (wQDH5)

429 One of the things hurting the Oscars is that there are virtually no decent movies made anymore, much less 4 or 5 spawning heated debate.

All the critically acclaimed movies are about fags, trannies or pedophiles.

So why would you watch? On the off chance mayne a titty pops out or something?

Posted by: Bitter Clinger at December 11, 2018 12:49 PM (rV640)

430 Next Oscar Host: Computer Generated Jamal Khashoggi
It puts all the right check marks in all of the right boxes.

Posted by: Darth Chipmunk at December 11, 2018 12:49 PM (t41dG)

431 Meryl Streep.

She can advise young actresses to lie back and think of potential stardom.

After all, it worked for her...

Posted by: The ARC of History at December 11, 2018 12:49 PM (TEv5V)

432 405 I hope they don't cancel the Oscars. I'm still holding out hope that ISIS will make a cameo appearance.

Hate to say I have "thought" about that myself

Posted by: It's me donna at December 11, 2018 12:49 PM (O2RFr)

433 he can parachut in. To sson?
Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 11, 2018 12:47 PM (bim/x)


Naw. Funny visual tho.

Posted by: eleven at December 11, 2018 12:49 PM (NLLmE)

434 I'm more than fine with shutting down the government if Chuck and Nancy won't give on the wall.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (/tuJf)
-------

I wish he would. Let's play hardball, just this once. And the wall is worth fighting for.

Posted by: bluebell at December 11, 2018 12:49 PM (U5tDi)

435 Triumph the Insult Comic Dog should be the host.

Posted by: Jolo at December 11, 2018 12:49 PM (WrMOC)

436 If it weren't for the fact that Google has declared him Obsolete, you would think that Milo Yoopanoopadipaduplos checks all the right boxes to host The Grand Golden Fagfest.

Posted by: Romney Wordsworth at December 11, 2018 12:49 PM (zDOSM)

437 I'm more than fine with shutting down the government if Chuck and Nancy won't give on the wall.





Posted by: JackStraw at December 11, 2018 12:46 PM (/tuJf)

The fucking government "shuts down" every weekend. People are really fucking stupid...

Posted by: Timon at December 11, 2018 12:50 PM (dKm4U)

438 Well, this has convinced me! I'm voting Kameltoe!

Kamala Harris
@KamalaHarris
"We know that if we want to live in a world that looks more like Wakanda, the first step is you invest in some women and girls."

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Tyrannosaur Wrangler at December 11, 2018 12:50 PM (+y/Ru)

439 Revelations is unfolding before our eyes.

Posted by: Balrog of Morgoth at December 11, 2018 11:44 AM (FTPVM)

From the last thread. Ace's last sentences above are from the same "Book".And there is nothing we can do to stop it.

Posted by: grannymimi at December 11, 2018 12:51 PM (u5LFV)

440 Riiiiiight....

Posted by: Dr. Evil at December 11, 2018 12:51 PM (BDZWU)

441 noood

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards, buy ammo at December 11, 2018 12:51 PM (xJa6I)

442 Maybe this is the end of the Oscars. Will anybody notice?

Posted by: katya the designated driver at December 11, 2018 12:54 PM (LGlN2)

443 LoL Victor29.

Who, back in HotAir days, was quoted by Rush Limbaugh. Like he read his comment on air.

True story.

Posted by: TexasDan at December 11, 2018 12:54 PM (yL25O)

444 Bianca Del Rio. Don Rickles, but protected.

Posted by: Aunt Ralph at December 11, 2018 12:57 PM (6VG2o)

445 How about Caitlan Jenner??

Posted by: RobG at December 11, 2018 01:21 PM (VIvNl)

446 Oprah Winfrey

Posted by: Nunya Bidness at December 11, 2018 01:33 PM (y7aoc)

447 Betty White.

Posted by: mpfs at December 11, 2018 01:35 PM (79p/O)

448 It's a good thing Kevin Hart didn't allegedly grab some teenage tit, or he'd be pulled thru the wringer like Brett Kavanaugh.

Posted by: Fritz at December 11, 2018 01:49 PM (Z9C5C)

449 "group monologue" - isn't that like saying "jumbo shrimp"?

Posted by: Eisenhorn at December 11, 2018 01:55 PM (uGHnY)

450 95 Ok: intersectionality time. What does Don Lemon think of all this??? (or Booker or Obama for that matter?)

He's gay intersecting with black. Does his black half support Hart as the black host? Or is his gay half against Hart? Which section wins out?
Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear

The half that enjoys getting fukt up the ass. Win win.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at December 11, 2018 02:00 PM (kfcYC)

451 4 And I wept much, because no man was found worthy to open and to read the envelope, neither to look thereon....
+++
5. But then the Spirit of the Moron Horde spoke unto me, as if from a heavenly Breaking of Wind. *Hast though lost all faith in the guidance of the Holy Instrument?*

6. Sore ashamed, I cast mine eyes down upon the Shelving, upon which reposeth the Give-A-Shit-Meter, and saw that it was unmoving: and it was good.

Posted by: Ray Van Dune at December 11, 2018 02:02 PM (JqqRY)

452 Go on YouTube and watch Norm Macdonald host the Candy Awards if you want to see a host kill it.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at December 11, 2018 02:04 PM (kfcYC)

453 They have to consider it, because who the in zir right mind would want the career-wrecking soul-destroying job?

Posted by: Socratease at December 11, 2018 03:28 PM (BT83d)

454 49 If you mean Jennifer Lawrence, then okay, as long as Tina and Jen oil wrestle on stage.

Victory to the first to remove or shred 100% of the opponents clothing, using only their lips, teeth, or tongue!

Posted by: Ray Van Dune at December 11, 2018 04:20 PM (eEO59)

455 "Group monolog". How do you say oxymoron in moron?

Posted by: Zibbs at December 11, 2018 05:58 PM (qa/4x)

456 Dave Chappelle.

Posted by: aelfheld at December 11, 2018 06:35 PM (IxDhF)

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