Soylo: A Soy Wars Soyry Will Be Disney's Lowest-Earning Soy Wars Entry Yet

Headline thanks to Comics Artist Pro Secrets. If the headline is indecipherable to you, Ethan Van Sciver says that Disney is producing "soy-based entertainment" -- cucked-out movies where all the women are bad-ass and decisive and all the men are ineffectual Pajama Boys and pansexuals -- and he calls their new movie "Solo: A Star Wars Story" "Soylo: A Soy Wars Soyry."

Which I think is pretty funny.

They're expecting Soylo: A Soy Wars Soyry to earn the least money of any Disney Soy-based entertainment.

The industry had been expecting, I thin, a $170 million domestic haul over the four-day Memorial Day Weekend (five, really, given that it opened Thursday night), but that had then be reduced to $150 million, and then to $130-$150 million, and then reduced again to $120 million.

Some thought that the $120 million was low-balling by Disney so that they could then beat the (lowered) expectations and claim success.

If so, that's not going to work: Soylo opened poorly last night and is now on track to make between $105 to $115 million its opening four (five) day weekend.

They had hoped it could at least take the title for "Biggest Memorial Day Opening." Memorial Day openings actually aren't all that big, and it's easy to score the record. Pirates of the Caribbean 3: The World's End set the record in 2007, I think, with around $138 million.

But they won't claim that prize.

Some are calling this fan revolt a "Soycott." (Which I also find amusing.) And it looks like the Soycott is real.

Soy Wars has not been popular in China. But Soylo just bombed worst than most in its opening night in China -- only $120,000 for midnight screenings in all of China, a nation of a billion and a half, according to a Chinese film industry analyst.

So the worldwide take isn't looking that great, either.

Soylo's Rotten Tomato score is at 69% (63% among Top Critics), and falling. (Update: It actually rose a point to 70% overnight. But the Top Critics score fell to 62%.)

Bear in mind, Disney arranges for a lot of shill internet "Geek Culture" reviewers to see these movies early to pad the Rotten Tomato ratings with Easy Lay reviews. But as the ratio of shill reviewers to nonshill reviewers declines, the Rotten Tomatoes score goes down.

How bad is the movie? It's this bad : Kathleen Kennedy actually dropped the "bombshell" news that she'd hired James Mangold to direct a stand-alone Soy Wars movie Boba Fett on the day that Soylo is premiered.

Why would she drop that headline when Soylo is supposed to be the headline? Because she wants to change the headline, obviously. She knows Soylo is bad news and I think she knows for the first time her job is in peril. So she drops this bait to get the shills to squawk about the possibility that a Boba Fett movie coming out three years from now (allegedly) instead of the movie she just dropped in a plop.

Here are some reviews:

As I already mentioned, Emergency Awesome -- a "geek culture" website you'd expect to be a soft, gentle reviewer for Soy Wars movie -- can only say the film is "just fine," and ranks it among Soy Wars movies lower than any movie except The Phantom Menace.

Mr. Sunday Movies, who generally is a lay-up review for Soy Wars movies (he loves The Last Jedi, for example), calls it "unnecessary," "paint by numbers," and "just flat." He ranks it, among Star Wars movies, only above the prequels, and he's not sure it's better than Revenge of the Sith, either.

Beyond the Trailer says it's just bad, and features a horribly annoying pure-Social Justice Warrior robot. Just what we needed! And even a female critic is put-off by Kathleen Kennedy's insistence of loading every Soy Wars movies with 90 pound girls who are Super Bad-Ass and can Kick Every Grown Man's ass but have absolutely no personality or memorability.

Those two reviews are spoiler-free, but Ethan Van Sciver's does have spoilers. He says it's a disaster and will result in future Soy Wars movie plans being changed/cancelled. Per his review, it's horrible enough that you shouldn't care about spoilers.

You can't really spoil a garbage fire. You kinda know how a garbage fire goes.

He also notes the "bitchy feminazi SJW robot." He says it's Soy Wars' worst, most SJW, most annoying character yet, beating out Rose Tico for that honor.

He also says this is the worst Soy Wars movie apart from The Last Jedi (which he hated).

Kathleen Kennedy really has no idea what she's doing. She spent most of her career as an assistant to Steven Spielberg. Now in charge, the only idea she has is to make every 90 pound girl a UFC champion-level badass and make random characters gay (or "pansexual").

She doesn't view these as products meant to entertain an audience, so much as to educate them in the mysterious Ways of The Feminist Force:

_dx7VB8xv6FtVNRQ_MOOVh9XDcaw-vdapmnZJGCyzSo.jpg

We'll see how much longer The Force is Female once Soylo gets done sharting box office failure all over the back of the toilet.

Note: Real news below. But I want to put this up before everyone blows home for the day.

Posted by: Ace of Spades at 04:04 PM




Comments

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1 First

Posted by: Buzzsaw at May 25, 2018 03:59 PM (aVYsC)

2 Everything has a certain slant to it.....

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, TX at May 25, 2018 04:00 PM (uDcBt)

3 2nd from the left - nice tits

Posted by: Rick in SK at May 25, 2018 04:00 PM (FZYNt)

4 Ahhh, no.

Posted by: RI Red at May 25, 2018 04:01 PM (zkOmb)

5 >>>3 2nd from the left - nice tits

good eyes. I missed them. They're sneaky like ninjas.

Posted by: ace at May 25, 2018 04:01 PM (8rNrN)

6 Foursome material.

Posted by: Under Fire at May 25, 2018 04:02 PM (r9UYA)

7 I may vomit.

Posted by: Jeanne del norte at May 25, 2018 04:02 PM (efMXe)

8 Well, thats good by me but John Podhoretz tweeted that he wants to know if all those women are glad for their husbands health insurance.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, coffee drinker at May 25, 2018 04:02 PM (NVmJr)

9 Hope Ace likes it inside the barrel - it's a three-day weekend.

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, TX at May 25, 2018 04:02 PM (uDcBt)

10 It was only a matter of time before they beat all my childhood heroes into the ground.

Posted by: Iblis at May 25, 2018 04:02 PM (9221z)

11 1-1-0-0

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 25, 2018 04:02 PM (89T5c)

12 I will take the two on the left. Nice forces.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, coffee drinker at May 25, 2018 04:03 PM (NVmJr)

13 Good.

They killed Star Wars, now they're reaping the results.

Posted by: What's a Seawolf? at May 25, 2018 04:03 PM (72PAC)

14 I thought The Force was gender-neutral.

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, TX at May 25, 2018 04:04 PM (uDcBt)

15 Babylon Bee

Fans call for more Common Sense Star Wars Control.

https://tinyurl.com/yb2sp98g

Posted by: buzzion at May 25, 2018 04:04 PM (lKs2v)

16 woke broke and done

Posted by: rod of correction at May 25, 2018 04:04 PM (WX+x0)

17 4 Ahhh, no.
Posted by: RI Red at May 25, 2018 04:01 PM (zkOmb)


Who are you trying to kid?

Every moron here would hit any one of them without even thinking about it. Even the "ettes.

That's just who we are.

Posted by: Jwest at May 25, 2018 04:05 PM (/roJx)

18 >>He also notes the "bitchy feminazi SJW robot." He says it's Soy Wars' worst, most SJW, most annoying character yet, beating out Rose Tico for that honor.


Jar Jar Binks blows a big ol' kiss to Kathleen Kennedy!

Posted by: Lizzy at May 25, 2018 04:05 PM (W+vEI)

19 Spolier:The SJW robot talks about Lando fucking it.It also blathers on about "droid rights" in every scene and claims Lando flirts with Solo.Solo winds up giving up his first big haul after setting the record on the Kessel run to an asskicking female who is.....starting the Rebellion.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:05 PM (LiyEm)

20 They are DC Universing Star Wars

Posted by: buzzion at May 25, 2018 04:06 PM (lKs2v)

21 How long before someone wakes up a Disney and says Money over Politics?

Posted by: Iblis at May 25, 2018 04:06 PM (9221z)

22 In fairness, the one on right was probably a 1 at one time. Her buddy to the left- not so much.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 25, 2018 04:06 PM (89T5c)

23 Dear Disney:

I decided to catch your new Star Wars movie while I was waiting for my uterus to be detailed. I noticed some kind of odd creatures in the background - they were almost human, but didn't appear to be women. What are they? Why are they not all in Bad People Prison?

Please advise,
-hogmartin

Posted by: hogmartin at May 25, 2018 04:07 PM (y87Qq)

24 Also according to one guy the Chewbacca character arc takes like 2 minutes,Han speaks Wookie to him and just like that they become friends for life.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:07 PM (LiyEm)

25 22 In fairness, the one on right was probably a 1 at one time. Her buddy to the left- not so much.
Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory

#3 is the ugly chick you pal around with to make you look hotter

Posted by: Rick in SK at May 25, 2018 04:07 PM (FZYNt)

26 I don't know....it would take a lot to be a worse character than Rose Tico.

Posted by: T at May 25, 2018 04:08 PM (Vgw1E)

27 Folks, I saw it today and enjoyed it, FWIW (I went in with low expectations). It was just a straight up action flick and I thought Ehrenreich and Glover captured the essence of the characters.

Come on, the planetary alignment of young Harrison Ford and young Billy D. Williams only comes around once a century. These two weren't bad at all.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at May 25, 2018 04:08 PM (qJtVm)

28 So that picture was evidently taken at a high school...

Posted by: William J Clinton at May 25, 2018 04:08 PM (wx6iv)

29 good eyes. I missed them. They're sneaky like ninjas.
Posted by: ace

I have a gift....

Posted by: Rick in SK at May 25, 2018 04:08 PM (FZYNt)

30 Kathleen Kennedy was George Lucas's secretary from what I understand.She has no artistic vision other than girl power is great and men suck.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:08 PM (LiyEm)

31 24 Also according to one guy the Chewbacca character arc takes like 2 minutes,Han speaks Wookie to him and just like that they become friends for life.
Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:07 PM (LiyEm)


That is such crap. Talk about just ignoring the entire backstory of Han and Chewie and the Wookiee life-debt.

Posted by: buzzion at May 25, 2018 04:09 PM (lKs2v)

32 25: it worked.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 25, 2018 04:09 PM (89T5c)

33 The casting of Han Solo is bad.


Sorry, that guy just stinks of friendzone beta boyishness.

And yet another petite, brunette Brit girl that could be a twin of Wray and Jyn.

Posted by: Lizzy at May 25, 2018 04:09 PM (W+vEI)

34 33 One reviewer said he is noticeably too short for the part.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:10 PM (LiyEm)

35 2, 4, 1,3. In that order.

Posted by: Mailman at May 25, 2018 04:10 PM (q3k4w)

36 >>>And yet another petite, brunette Brit girl that could be a twin of Wray and Jyn.


also carrie fischer had a british accent, most of the time, at least.

Grace Randolph points out that by featuring a leia clone, this kinda cheapens the Han-Leia relationship by making Leia just a girl who looked like a girl he dated when he was younger.

Posted by: ace at May 25, 2018 04:11 PM (8rNrN)

37 #2 has tits that stop traffic, #3 has a face that's stopped a Mack truck

Posted by: Rick in SK at May 25, 2018 04:12 PM (FZYNt)

38 The Force can make me a sandwich.

Posted by: JackStraw at May 25, 2018 04:12 PM (/tuJf)

39 >>Grace Randolph points out that by featuring a leia clone, this kinda cheapens the Han-Leia relationship by making Leia just a girl who looked like a girl he dated when he was younger.


Ugh, yeah, they are all clones of Leia, but with 21st century Buffy TVS realness!

Posted by: Lizzy at May 25, 2018 04:13 PM (W+vEI)

40 The Force Is Female.

Until a spider needs squishing.

Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 04:13 PM (3oX+R)

41 also carrie fischer had a british accent, most of the time, at least.
---
I would call it the classic Hollywood mid-Atlantic accent.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at May 25, 2018 04:13 PM (qJtVm)

42 Oh hey, another Disney mashup that I won't see...

Posted by: kraken at May 25, 2018 04:13 PM (zSVEm)

43 I read the spoilers.

They fucked up and minimized the meeting of Han and Chewbacca.

Star Wars is dead. No hope. Not even a New one.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, AKA VA GOP Sucks at May 25, 2018 04:13 PM (G8hDY)

44 I quit watching after I walked out in disgust during the second of the prequels. But that, I sort of get - they were children's movies at that time. I saw the first of the new movies with a friend at his house and despised it.

The review up there says this new installment is "flat" and "paint by numbers" but the reviewer is usually enthusiastic. I described the first of the new series I saw as "a boring, paint-by-numbers, off-the-rack affair with way too much girl power thrown in." I can't imagine how bad this one will be. I won't be seeing it.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 25, 2018 04:13 PM (I2dne)

45 was unaware The Force had monthly visitors

Posted by: Rick in SK at May 25, 2018 04:14 PM (FZYNt)

46 It would be fantastic if SJW Ep IX bombed as well.

Then Disney would be in full blown panic mode.

Posted by: What's a Seawolf? at May 25, 2018 04:14 PM (72PAC)

47 On SJW robots: I am all for it, if it means we no longer have SJW people. You can shut off a robot.

Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 25, 2018 04:14 PM (I2dne)

48 Screw you, round-eyes!

Posted by: margaret chobot at May 25, 2018 04:14 PM (Evws/)

49 Of course, I am not the demographic that Disney is putting on the Red Dress for.....

Posted by: kraken at May 25, 2018 04:14 PM (zSVEm)

50 >>>46 It would be fantastic if SJW Ep IX bombed as well.

Then Disney would be in full blown panic mode.

...

I think they're in panic mode right now.

Posted by: ace at May 25, 2018 04:15 PM (8rNrN)

51 Leia was tough but believable tough.They had to make Jyn beat Stormtroopers hand to hand.As for Rey,forget about it.Barely trained at all yet she is better than everybody at anything.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:15 PM (LiyEm)

52 11
1-1-0-0

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 25, 2018 04:02 PM (89T5c)


LOL!!
1-1-1(with beer)-1
It takes a lot to be a Zero.

Posted by: anchorbabe fashion cop at May 25, 2018 04:15 PM (8iiMU)

53 >>The Force can make me a sandwich.


*wipes screen*

THAT needs to on a T.

Posted by: Lizzy at May 25, 2018 04:15 PM (W+vEI)

54 Leia was hot.... these feminists are not....

Posted by: kraken at May 25, 2018 04:15 PM (zSVEm)

55 They get the moon of Endor curse.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at May 25, 2018 04:16 PM (89T5c)

56 Black guys should be real annoyed they took the real smooth cool black character,the only one from the original trilogy,and made him a fruitcake.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:16 PM (LiyEm)

57 They should remake Fantastic Voyage where Anderson Cooper, Don Lemon, and Shep Smith get shrunk down and injected into a body and explore the rectum.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at May 25, 2018 04:16 PM (4ErVI)

58 apparently this one has a kick-ass SJW female robot, a kick-ass love interest with a ninja sword, and a kick-ass teenage girl.

Plus another kick-ass woman.

And a kick-ass female alien crime-lord.

Every woman kicks ass. Meanwhile, Lando's fucking a robot.

Posted by: ace at May 25, 2018 04:16 PM (8rNrN)

59 "I got a bad feeling about this."

THERE. FAN SERVICE!

Posted by: Ron Howard at May 25, 2018 04:16 PM (CPfoe)

60 57 They should remake Fantastic Voyage where Anderson Cooper, Don Lemon, and Shep Smith get shrunk down and injected into a body and explore the rectum.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at May 25, 2018 04:16 PM (4ErVI)


Ah, the Lemmiwinks gambit....

Posted by: kraken at May 25, 2018 04:17 PM (zSVEm)

61 Too bad we couldn't have a Sabine Wren movie, minus the bad haircut. Female, but at least a semi interesting character.

Posted by: Thing From Snowy Mountain at May 25, 2018 04:17 PM (87ijN)

62 >>Leia was tough but believable tough.They had to make Jyn beat Stormtroopers hand to hand.As for Rey,forget about it.Barely trained at all yet she is better than everybody at anything.



Hey now, Rey had to kinda sorta close her eyes and breath deep a few times before being able to fully summon her stronger-than-Luke-trained Jedi mindtricks!

Posted by: Lizzy at May 25, 2018 04:17 PM (W+vEI)

63 >>>We'll see how much longer The Force is Female once Soylo gets done sharting box office failure all over the back of the toilet.

WHAT HAS DISNEY DONE WITH MY PENIS? Maybe I should change my name to the Receptivity.

Posted by: the Force at May 25, 2018 04:17 PM (/qEW2)

64 I think they're in panic mode right now.

Posted by: ace at May 25, 2018 04:15 PM (8rNrN)

They might be, but as much as a disaster as TLJ was in terms of the image and prestige of Star Wars, it still made them a nice profit. Not as much as expected, but in the green.

This disaster can be spun as just a spinoff fail and hey, we still have the Ep IX finale big money maker coming.

If THAT bombs (say under 1 bil,) and there are no bright spots on the horizon, then heads will roll.

Posted by: What's a Seawolf? at May 25, 2018 04:17 PM (72PAC)

65 Disney must be shitting bricks trying to figure out how to save its dying $4 billion franchise.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at May 25, 2018 04:18 PM (CPfoe)

66 50 >>>46 It would be fantastic if SJW Ep IX bombed as well.

Then Disney would be in full blown panic mode.

...

I think they're in panic mode right now.

Posted by: ace at May 25, 2018 04:15 PM (8rNrN)



I was severely disappointed in Abrams being named the director again. He was ok for The Force Awakens to wash the prequels taste out of everyone's mouth. But "better than the prequels" isn't sufficient going forward after that. And he's demonstrated with Star Trek and TFA that he has really no fucking clue on the concept of Space and Time.

Posted by: buzzion at May 25, 2018 04:18 PM (lKs2v)

67 >>>59 "I got a bad feeling about this."

THERE. FAN SERVICE!

...

they changed the line to "I've got a GREAT feeling about this," and I imagine they changed it because they really did have a bad feeling about this, and they didn't want to shine a light on that.

Posted by: ace at May 25, 2018 04:18 PM (8rNrN)

68 Every movie,every video game,every comic ,every tv show with the ass kicking females.Give it a fucking rest already.Even that Navy SEALs show on the History Channel they now added a female ass kicking CIA agent.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:18 PM (LiyEm)

69 >>good eyes. I missed them. They're sneaky like ninjas.


These are not the Jugs you are looking for.

But, they are some nice ones.

Posted by: garrett at May 25, 2018 04:18 PM (di+2x)

70 Don't care what they look like. To be fair, I wouldn't care if they were men in their 20-40's who were workers on the "Solo" movie either, Saw "2 Star Wars" movies. That was it. I assume the oldest one is Kathleen Kennedy? Who are the others?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 04:18 PM (vw6r3)

71 Thanks for covering this ace. I know it's not of interest to some of the news junkies here, but I find it fascinating. Culture is important. This particular story is very amusing to me.

Posted by: Max Power at May 25, 2018 04:18 PM (Hucnr)

72 How bad is this movie: Senator Harris demanded to know if the CIA was forcing detainees to watch this movie as a form of enhanced interrogation.

Posted by: Mallamutt at May 25, 2018 04:19 PM (/HC6x)

73 I just hope they put that dwarf Asian gnome chick in this one.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at May 25, 2018 04:19 PM (CPfoe)

74 The Original Leia was hot, for clarification....

Posted by: kraken at May 25, 2018 04:19 PM (zSVEm)

75 Those grrrlzzzz are not 90 pounds

Just saying

Posted by: LASue at May 25, 2018 04:19 PM (tChmn)

76 Three out of four are Ones. That's not bad.

Posted by: rickl at May 25, 2018 04:19 PM (xjiRE)

77 We'll see how much longer The Force is Female once Soylo gets done sharting box office failure all over the back of the toilet.




Disney is full on SJW. It doesn't matter how bad it bombs they'll keep cranking out lefty crap

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 25, 2018 04:19 PM (SiINZ)

78 75 Those grrrlzzzz are not 90 pounds

Just saying
Posted by: LASue at May 25, 2018 04:19 PM (tChmn)

But they identify as 90 pounds.

Posted by: What's a Seawolf? at May 25, 2018 04:19 PM (72PAC)

79 Disney just lost $186 million with SJW Orca Winfrey's latest bomb, 'A Wrinkle in Time'.

Us and worldwide gross was just a paltry $127 million.

Disney needs to get back to its roots - Disney Gay programming on ABC television.

Posted by: Surf & Turf at May 25, 2018 04:20 PM (pzRC2)

80 >>These are not the Jugs you are looking for.

>>But, they are some nice ones.

They'd be better if they were coming at chest height and not stomach height.

Gravity and time will not be kind to her.

Posted by: JackStraw at May 25, 2018 04:20 PM (/tuJf)

81 When I was a little manPlay-Doh came in a little canI was Star Wars' biggest fanBut now I'm stuck without a plan.
G.I. Joe was an Action ManShaggy drove the Mystery VanDevo was my favorite bandTake me back to my happy land.

Posted by: Stu Podaso at May 25, 2018 04:20 PM (9LIpg)

82 Disney has sure gone downhill since Little Mermaid. All for trying to get PC BS. I'm sure Walt is rolling over in his grave. Movies are for entertainment.

Posted by: Vic We Have No Party at May 25, 2018 04:20 PM (mpXpK)

83 61 Too bad we couldn't have a Sabine Wren movie, minus the bad haircut. Female, but at least a semi interesting character.
Posted by: Thing From Snowy Mountain at May 25, 2018 04:17 PM (87ijN)


Yeah, but then they'd have to figure out how to ret-con Ezra Bridger back into the mix.
Yeah they got him lost in Space with Thrawn but still.

The sad thing is they had so many good stories written, and they didn't even try to use any of them.

Posted by: Iblis at May 25, 2018 04:21 PM (9221z)

84 Three out of four are Ones. That's not bad.

Posted by: rickl at May 25, 2018 04:19 PM (xjiRE)



Only if the scale is 1 out of 100.

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 25, 2018 04:21 PM (SiINZ)

85 Disney is all in on the Obama Doctrine ( Communist), of " Fundamentally Transforming America"....

Posted by: kraken at May 25, 2018 04:21 PM (zSVEm)

86 71 Thanks for covering this ace. I know it's not of interest to some of the news junkies here, but I find it fascinating. Culture is important. This particular story is very amusing to me.
Posted by: Max Power at May 25, 2018 04:18 PM (Hucnr)

Yep, all battles are important. It's going to take time to reduce the liberal stench of pop culture, but movies like this and TLJ's huge negative reception are a great sign.

Posted by: What's a Seawolf? at May 25, 2018 04:21 PM (72PAC)

87 Well,one reviewer said they didn't make the girls better than Han.That the first 90 minutes are pretty good (aside from the robot and Lando stuff)but in the last 40 minutes it is revealed that the super tough person they had run ins with is a petite female under the armor.Than they reveal that she is staring the Rebellion.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:21 PM (LiyEm)

88 >>Gravity and time will not be kind to her.


'A flower only blooms once, my dear. And you are running out of sunlight.' - Shit Grandma said to my Sister Vol I

Posted by: garrett at May 25, 2018 04:22 PM (di+2x)

89 Gravity and time will not be kind to her.
Posted by: JackStraw at May 25, 2018 04:20 PM (/tuJf)

Gravity and time are usually not kind to anyone unless you spend a lot of time at the gym and also have a lot of plastic surgery.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 04:22 PM (vw6r3)

90 We'll see how much longer The Force is Female once Soylo gets done sharting box office failure all over the back of the toilet.

WHAT HAS DISNEY DONE WITH MY PENIS? Maybe I should change my name to the Receptivity David Hogg.

Posted by: the Force


FIFY

Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 04:22 PM (3oX+R)

91 >>>Soy Wars has not been popular in China.

Soy actually explains a lot of what is extant in China and Thailand.

Posted by: the Force at May 25, 2018 04:22 PM (/qEW2)

92 "Soy Wars has not been popular in China."
They love Trump and especially The Goddess Ivanka. One Chinese man said that he couldn't understand why Trump is not popular in the US: "You used to love successful men." Of course the media leads him to believe no one admires that, but still.
So why would they love this SJW crap?

Posted by: PJ at May 25, 2018 04:22 PM (qlTN9)

93 Ah, well, serves them right. Saw the horrid audience reviews for Last Jedi and went to see it anyhow. And it sucked COMPLETELY.

If the audience reviews for this were decent, I'd see it, but they are, again, horrid. Currently 54% on RT and if you do a quick survey yourself, you'll quickly see that it's only that high because RT is manipulating the numbers. They claim it counts as a "like" if you rate it 3.5 stars or better. Go count for yourself. Rarely do the reviews on one page add up to even 50%. Yet, somehow, when you aggregate them together, you get 54%.

Not sure how dumb they think people are. I'll wait and then, the day it comes out on BR, I'll torrent that sucker just to see how bad it really is. Not one red cent goes to Disney for this treachery

Posted by: deadrody at May 25, 2018 04:22 PM (jsGbO)

94 Than they reveal that she is staring the Rebellion.

Stare mean, or stare curious?

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at May 25, 2018 04:22 PM (CPfoe)

95 That pic would be SOO much better were them broads topless.

Posted by: Sponge at May 25, 2018 04:22 PM (F4u7C)

96 " Politics is downstream of a dumpster fire"... or something...

Posted by: kraken at May 25, 2018 04:22 PM (zSVEm)

97 After early previews Kathleen Kennedy announced that a Lando solo movie would be "next"

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:23 PM (LiyEm)

98 ace some reviews are listed TWICE on RT because the publish on multiple platforms, 70 percent is a fake rating. Also be aware that Rotten Roommates screens out the lowest ratings, so for instance the actual audience rating for Last Jedi is actually 24 percent. I have Solo two stars just to make sure my review counted.

Posted by: Max Power at May 25, 2018 04:23 PM (Hucnr)

99 >>'A flower only blooms once, my dear. And you are running out of sunlight.' - Shit Grandma said to my Sister Vol I

I like Grandma.

Posted by: JackStraw at May 25, 2018 04:23 PM (/tuJf)

100 >>They'd be better if they were coming at chest height and not stomach height.


Poor girl has a goofy body. Really short torso with HUGE CANS. HUGE. She needs jeans that ride lower.

Maybe some tanlines.

Also, a nose job.

Posted by: garrett at May 25, 2018 04:23 PM (di+2x)

101 94 Starting wise guy

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:23 PM (LiyEm)

102 >>Meanwhile, Lando's fucking a robot.




And in Rogue One they had the ancient practitioners of The Force be akin to being a couple of Buddhist monks, with a little bromance vibes.

Posted by: Lizzy at May 25, 2018 04:23 PM (W+vEI)

103 95 That pic would be SOO much better were them broads topless.
Posted by: Sponge at May 25, 2018 04:22 PM (F4u7C)

...get us an Episode X script by Monday.

Posted by: Desperate Disney Execs in Two Years at May 25, 2018 04:23 PM (72PAC)

104 "most annoying character yet, beating out Rose Tico for that honor."==========Meeso thank goodness!

Posted by: Jar Jar Binks at May 25, 2018 04:23 PM (0/B0s)

105 Star Wars must die.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at May 25, 2018 04:24 PM (Y9uH4)

106 I thought The Force was gender-neutral.
Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, TX at May 25, 2018 04:04 PM (uDcBt)



Midichlorians are kind of like yeast infections, IIRC.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at May 25, 2018 04:24 PM (CPfoe)

107 If it took $300 million to make and they spend another $300 million marketing it, then after its estimated $700 million in worldwide revenues it will only lose $$400 million.

Hollywood math!

Posted by: Huck Follywood, coffee drinker at May 25, 2018 04:24 PM (NVmJr)

108

O/T - No little Hoggenfuhrer protestors at my local Publix. It was bidness as usual. No dead bodies.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy likes lobster at May 25, 2018 04:24 PM (GdWl+)

109 98 EVS found one critics review that was actually of Deadpool 2

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:24 PM (LiyEm)

110 I hate fucking robots.

Posted by: C3PO at May 25, 2018 04:24 PM (CPfoe)

111 107 Because they caved.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:24 PM (LiyEm)

112 seems this movie mostly just fucked the dog.

Posted by: Boulder t'hobo at May 25, 2018 04:24 PM (gMim2)

113 They gendered the Force? Cis-hets!

Posted by: joncelli, providing the traditional responses at May 25, 2018 04:25 PM (RD7QR)

114 104 I rewatched Phantom Menace and Jar Jar made me chuckle a few times.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:25 PM (LiyEm)

115
Looks like the Force could stand to go on a diet and to devote some serious time to shaping up in the gym.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 25, 2018 04:26 PM (NoLse)

116 From left to right...2,...1... tequila, 3

Posted by: Minnfidel at May 25, 2018 04:26 PM (3c1uO)

117 they changed the line to "I've got a GREAT feeling about this," and I imagine they changed it because they really did have a bad feeling about this, and they didn't want to shine a light on that.

Posted by: ace at May 25, 2018 04:18 PM (8rNrN)



Meh. They could have gone all in. "I've got a GREAT feeling about this, AND YOU WILL TOO!"

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at May 25, 2018 04:26 PM (CPfoe)

118 Ethan Van Sciver, by the way, has declared that he can beat any 16 year old girl's ass, and he will fight any 16 year old girl who challenges him to prove this.

Posted by: ace at May 25, 2018 04:26 PM (8rNrN)

119 Plinkett has said it all about Star Wars...

Posted by: kraken at May 25, 2018 04:26 PM (zSVEm)

120 I remember a time when I might have cared about this.

But now I don't care, and I'm not even gonna watch it when it's free on cable in 6 month, like all the suk movies are.

Posted by: Tom Servo at May 25, 2018 04:26 PM (k1TUh)

121 Yeah, but then they'd have to figure out how to ret-con Ezra Bridger back into the mix.
Yeah they got him lost in Space with Thrawn but still.

The sad thing is they had so many good stories written, and they didn't even try to use any of them.


It really makes me think about the ending of Rebels. They went through all of this stuff, killing off Canan and sending Ezra and Thrawn out into the nether regions of the galaxy, to Protect Luke's Place in the Narrative... just in time for Rian Johnson to come along with The Last Jedi and destroy Luke's Place in the Narrative.

Posted by: Thing From Snowy Mountain at May 25, 2018 04:26 PM (87ijN)

122 In Episode VL, Tom Cruise will star as L. Rin Hubbard and he will clear all the robots.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, coffee drinker at May 25, 2018 04:26 PM (NVmJr)

123
Tofu tough guys!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 25, 2018 04:27 PM (NoLse)

124 Houston police chief says he is "watching" Dana Loesch.She torches him(now THERE is a kick ass female)

https://pjmedia.com/instapundit/297786/

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:27 PM (LiyEm)

125
Poor girl has a goofy body. Really short torso with HUGE CANS. HUGE. She needs jeans that ride lower.

Maybe some tanlines.

Also, a nose job.

Posted by: garrett

and bent over a table wearing a maid's outfit

Posted by: Rick in SK at May 25, 2018 04:27 PM (FZYNt)

126
I could barely make it through the Farce Awakens and watched about 10 minutes of the Last SJW Jedi. Justin Trudeau Jr and Mary Sue Jedi are just watchable. They have completely ruined what was once a fun movie series. Actually that only goes for the first three movies. The prequels were crap, but not SJW crap from what I remember.

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 25, 2018 04:27 PM (SiINZ)

127 124 Houston police chief says he is "watching" Dana Loesch.She torches him(now THERE is a kick ass female)

https://pjmedia.com/instapundit/297786/
Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:27 PM (LiyEm)

How very Stasi of him.....

Posted by: kraken at May 25, 2018 04:27 PM (zSVEm)

128 O/T - No little Hoggenfuhrer protestors at my local Publix. It was bidness as usual. No dead bodies.
Posted by: BackwardsBoy likes lobster at May 25, 2018 04:24 PM (GdWl+)


They cancelled it because Pubix caved.....

Posted by: Sponge at May 25, 2018 04:28 PM (F4u7C)

129 Little Jump Rope, some Makeup and a Vo5 Hot Oil Treatment and the one on the left could pass for a not quite young anymore Marcia Brady.

Posted by: garrett at May 25, 2018 04:28 PM (di+2x)

130 118 Shades of Andy Kaufman....

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:28 PM (LiyEm)

131 I rewatched Phantom Menace and Jar Jar made me chuckle a few times.
Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:25 PM (LiyEm)


I rewatched it and Jar Jar is now totally ignorable but I wanted someone to punt that kid so hard.

Posted by: hogmartin at May 25, 2018 04:28 PM (y87Qq)

132 I don't care about these movies. I just want SJW Disney, the Axis of Evil, to fail.

Posted by: ace at May 25, 2018 04:28 PM (8rNrN)

133 I proudly wore my official "Soylo" shirt to work today.

Posted by: antisocial justice beatnik at May 25, 2018 04:28 PM (NL6wI)

134
Soy Wars has not been popular in China.


Not even after adding that entirely gratuitous waster of oxygen female sack of suet with raisin eyes in The Least Jethead?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 25, 2018 04:29 PM (NoLse)

135 131 Yep,the kid is way worse than Jar Jar.I believe his life has been a train wreck since as well...

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:29 PM (LiyEm)

136 ." She needs jeans that ride lower."


Like off?

Posted by: Minnfidel at May 25, 2018 04:29 PM (3c1uO)

137 ...or, maybe try our Low Cal, No Carb alternative?

Posted by: Force Salesman at May 25, 2018 04:29 PM (di+2x)

138 You guys keep dissin Kathleen Kennedy's looks (no.3) and she is a no talent SWJ hack who hates fanbois and wants to destroy an historic male-centric franchise.

But she's really a 100,000,000 or more where her bank account is concerned. You can pick up all sorts of hot chicks with the credit card she gives you in your birthday present Ferrari.

Posted by: Keith at May 25, 2018 04:29 PM (USf3s)

139 Well, if that red carpet picture is accurate the force may be female but it is also fat.

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 04:30 PM (MTjB1)

140 >>I don't care about these movies.


I only care about the tits.

Posted by: garrett at May 25, 2018 04:30 PM (di+2x)

141 The best Han Solo standalone stories I've read were written by Brian Daley shortly after Star Wars came out.

This Soylo crap...is insulting.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, AKA VA GOP Sucks at May 25, 2018 04:30 PM (G8hDY)

142 But she's really a 100,000,000 or more where her bank account is concerned. You can pick up all sorts of hot chicks with the credit card she gives you in your birthday present Ferrari.
Posted by: Keith at May




how do you know her net worth?

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 04:30 PM (MTjB1)

143 >>Ethan Van Sciver, by the way, has declared that he can beat any 16 year old girl's ass, and he will fight any 16 year old girl who challenges him to prove this.



His contempt for Rose Tico is amusing.

On a fashion blog covering the various dresses worn at The Last Jedi openings many Asian commenters were saying, "WTF, Disney? Why do we not get a pretty Asian character, we just get a homely girl for 'comedic' side stories?" So, Disney probably isn't pleasing the demographic the way they had hoped.

Posted by: Lizzy at May 25, 2018 04:30 PM (W+vEI)

144 This is the most expensive Star Wars movie ever made, BTW.

Posted by: Max Power at May 25, 2018 04:30 PM (Hucnr)

145 The Force is Fat.... that would be an interesting Tshirt....

Posted by: kraken at May 25, 2018 04:31 PM (zSVEm)

146 Well, if that red carpet picture is accurate the force may be female but it is also fat.
Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 04:30 PM (MTjB1)


Tough crowd.....

Posted by: Sponge at May 25, 2018 04:31 PM (F4u7C)

147 But she's really a 100,000,000 or more where her bank account is concerned. You can pick up all sorts of hot chicks with the credit card she gives you in your birthday present Ferrari.


Okay. I'll date her.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at May 25, 2018 04:31 PM (CPfoe)

148 Just from an arc standpoint it makes no sense.

Han in the original films is in his early 30's, this story set s Han in his mid twenties, so we are to believe that Han became this notorious and galaxy spanning pirate/smuggler in less than a decade?

Makes no fucking sense.

It would have made more sense if Han was shanghied into a world of smuggling and piracy at very early age and brought up into that world before he decided he had enough and wanted to go his own way.

But as usual, Hollywood has zero imagination.

Posted by: Kreplach at May 25, 2018 04:31 PM (UfMVm)

149 Let it die.

Disney killing Star Wars would be an awesome fulfillment of Leftist Corruption as destiny.

Throwing all that money away destroying the biggest franchise in history in pursuit of Leftist Identity Politics would be like a pop culture (and corporate) version of Venezuela. Maybe THIS would get through the jellybrains of some people.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 25, 2018 04:31 PM (oVJmc)

150 Kathleen Kennedy really has no idea what she's doing. She spent most of her career as an assistant to Steven Spielberg. Now in charge, the only idea she has is to make every 90 pound girl a UFC champion-level badass and make random characters gay (or "pansexual").



Sounds like a receipt for success on putting out good movies

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 25, 2018 04:31 PM (SiINZ)

151 They should remake Fantastic Voyage where Anderson Cooper, Don Lemon,
and Shep Smith get shrunk down and injected into a body and explore the
rectum.

They can call it Fabulous Voyage...

Posted by: tu3031 at May 25, 2018 04:31 PM (O5Q3r)

152 Ever see a chick wearing boxing gloves flailing away ineffectually at a heavy bag?
Then you've seen 99.999% of women in a "kickbox" class.

Posted by: xnycpeasant at May 25, 2018 04:31 PM (koNhm)

153 The Force is no excuse for not getting in a little Cardio now and then, Ladies.

Posted by: garrett at May 25, 2018 04:32 PM (di+2x)

154 >>I don't care about these movies.

I only care about the tits.
Posted by: garrett at May 25, 2018 04:30 PM (di+2x)


And this ashtray... and this paddle game. Just the tits, the ashtray, and the paddle game...

Posted by: hogmartin at May 25, 2018 04:32 PM (y87Qq)

155 On a fashion blog covering the various dresses worn at The Last Jedi openings many Asian commenters were saying, "WTF, Disney? Why do we not get a pretty Asian character, we just get a homely girl for 'comedic' side stories?" So, Disney probably isn't pleasing the demographic the way they had hoped.


Well, that's $18 in merchandise sales that Disney left on the table.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at May 25, 2018 04:32 PM (CPfoe)

156 Those chicks in the picture are half-right - the force isn't female but it is gay as hell.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at May 25, 2018 04:32 PM (RPXrN)

157 Poor girl has a goofy body. Really short torso with HUGE CANS. HUGE. She needs jeans that ride lower.

Maybe some tanlines.

---


AtC??

Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 04:32 PM (3oX+R)

158 Wow,one of my first comments was almost exactly what ace said in the piece.Probably should have read it first...

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:32 PM (LiyEm)

159 Happy Hour waits for no man.

Posted by: JackStraw at May 25, 2018 04:32 PM (/tuJf)

160 My 14 year old daughter loves the Star Wars series, I'll go with her because it's something she still wants to do with me as my cool factor decreases weekly. I have to take every chance I can get to be with her.

Posted by: Minnfidel at May 25, 2018 04:32 PM (3c1uO)

161 Yes, the Force is Female...

Which is why the Male Jedi Masters keep ending up living in Hovels... in swamps and Deserts... with no real Possessions....

Because the Force got it all in the Divorce...

Posted by: Obi Don Quixote at May 25, 2018 04:32 PM (NgKpN)

162 I soy-led myself.

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at May 25, 2018 04:33 PM (ATVNj)

163 151 They should remake Fantastic Voyage where Anderson Cooper, Don Lemon,
and Shep Smith get shrunk down and injected into a body and explore the
rectum.

They can call it Fabulous Voyage...
Posted by: tu3031 at May 25, 2018 04:31 PM (O5Q3r)

Makes me kind of want to see a Lost in Space version with Bill Kristol and fellow cucks after a cruise gone wrong.

They'd be dead in an episode, but it'd be one hell of an episode.

Posted by: What's a Seawolf? at May 25, 2018 04:33 PM (72PAC)

164 how do you know her net worth?
Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 04:30 PM (MTjB1)

Pillow talk, while I'm filing down her corns for some afterplay

Posted by: Keith at May 25, 2018 04:33 PM (USf3s)

165 Next project is a remake of Die Hard.

In this version, Holly beats up and kills 13 terrorists, lead by a billionaire capitalist playboy nazi named Ronsald Dump. While John broods to his fellow hostages about racial discrimination at chain coffee shops, the subtle tyranny of the bourgeoise class, and the political viewpoints of midsize supermarkets, Holly singlehandedly throws Rons off of Dump Tower with her signature catch phrase "Yippee metoo-ki-yay, Pussygrabber".

After they get out of the building, instead of ickily punching Deputy Chief Robinson, John shits on a random cop car.

Victory for the proletariat! The smash hit of the Summer!

Posted by: Mega at May 25, 2018 04:33 PM (rv0Fo)

166 Ever see a chick wearing boxing gloves flailing away ineffectually at a heavy bag?


Actually, I'm picturing Bill Kristol.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at May 25, 2018 04:33 PM (CPfoe)

167 Note: Real news below. But I want to put this up before everyone blows home for the day.

thanks. i actually get off work just before the showtime for the last 3d matinee and drive by the theater on my way home.

appreciate you thinking of me.

Posted by: Anachronda at May 25, 2018 04:33 PM (v3pYe)

168 This story would have made me angry 20 years ago as Solo had been my favorite character in the Star Wars story line.

10 years ago it would have made me slightly sad as it would me that the franchise was in danger of dying and would take the extended universe novels with it.

Now? I wish I could be happy that Disney has shit the bed with this.

I saw the first movie more then 30 times in 1977. I was a huge fan.

I think for the franchise it is even worse that I care more about the weather in San Francisco last Thursday then I care about how any Star Wars movie does. They are irrelevant.

Posted by: Big V at May 25, 2018 04:33 PM (ZvLtE)

169 In the future, smashing into cars and missing the sidewalk by a mile will be considered "good parking."
True fact.

Posted by: xnycpeasant at May 25, 2018 04:33 PM (koNhm)

170 IMO The root problem with Solo is that the premise is lazy shit. Look, a bunch of remarks made in Star Wars and Empire that give name to some of Solo's past and make him interesting does not make a compelling case for filling in the details with a movie of its own. We already knew Solo won the Falcon from Lando - the minutiae was not just unnecessary, but doesn't live up to one's own imagination.
Anyways, Star Wars was dead to me when the idiots decided it was a good idea to use three movies and nearly 8 hours of screen time to tell the Darth Vader origin story. *facepalm*

Posted by: Darth Chipmunk at May 25, 2018 04:34 PM (0/B0s)

171
Antibiotic-resistant midichlamydia will be the ruin of all space bordelos between here and Alderan!

You have been warned!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 25, 2018 04:34 PM (NoLse)

172 But as usual, Hollywood has zero imagination.

And no respect for REAL writing.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 25, 2018 04:34 PM (oVJmc)

173 It's not that I don't want to be a fan of Star Wars. Disney doesn't want me to be a fan of Star Wars.

Posted by: Stu Podaso at May 25, 2018 04:34 PM (9LIpg)

174 I don't care about these movies.

I only care about the tits.
Posted by: garrett at May 25, 2018 04:30 PM (di+2x)

And this ashtray... and this paddle game. Just the tits, the ashtray, and the paddle game...
Posted by: hogmartin


And jerky. Tits, ashtray, paddle game & jerky.

Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 04:34 PM (3oX+R)

175 Ever see a chick wearing boxing gloves flailing away ineffectually at a heavy bag?

The really sad part is that they usually have them on upside down.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at May 25, 2018 04:34 PM (RPXrN)

176 Folks, I saw it today and enjoyed it, FWIW (I went in with low expectations). It was just a straight up action flick and I thought Ehrenreich and Glover captured the essence of the characters.

Straight up? So there were actually straight characters in it?

And was the eponymous character actually the main character of the flick? Or did it devolve into annoying PC bullshit distractions? Just because they throw in some action doesn't mean it's a "straight up action flick". Are the annoying PC distractions enough to ruin the flick for someone who just wants an entertaining action flick?

Posted by: the Force at May 25, 2018 04:35 PM (/qEW2)

177 Houston police chief says he is "watching" Dana Loesch.She torches him(now THERE is a kick ass female)

https://pjmedia.com/instapundit/297786/
Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:27 PM (LiyEm)



Has she gotten a restraining order against the wanker?

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 25, 2018 04:35 PM (SiINZ)

178 >>The really sad part is that they usually have them on upside down.


Well, it's confusing.

They have to put them on Front to Back.

Posted by: garrett at May 25, 2018 04:36 PM (di+2x)

179 Doesn't Disney also do the Marvel movies?

The meeting of Han and Chewie seems to mirror the meeting of Thor and Hulk in Thor Ragnorok.


They are so out of ideas they even have to recycle them between franchises.

Posted by: WitchDoktor, AKA VA GOP Sucks at May 25, 2018 04:36 PM (G8hDY)

180 ut as usual, Hollywood has zero imagination.

And no respect for REAL writing.


Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 25, 2018 04:34 PM (oVJmc)

But what about Iron Man 8 or Fast and Furious 10? Certainly those are better than Casablanca or Dr. Zhivago amirite?

Posted by: Quint at May 25, 2018 04:36 PM (n13/j)

181 >>It would have made more sense if Han was shanghied into a world of smuggling and piracy at very early age and brought up into that world before he decided he had enough and wanted to go his own way.

But as usual, Hollywood has zero imagination.





I wouldn't say that....

Posted by: Peter Quill a/k/a Star Lord at May 25, 2018 04:36 PM (W+vEI)

182 Titties and beer. And the occasional vodka or whisky.

Posted by: Sponge at May 25, 2018 04:36 PM (F4u7C)

183 Any bets on how long it will take before the force is transgender?

Posted by: Concerned People's Front at May 25, 2018 04:37 PM (rdl6o)

184 114 104 I rewatched Phantom Menace and Jar Jar made me chuckle a few times."

Especially when I think about how much he reminds me of Obama.

Posted by: Tom Servo at May 25, 2018 04:37 PM (k1TUh)

185 Boba Fett, the Gay Blade.
Summer 2020.

Posted by: wooga at May 25, 2018 04:37 PM (CBwKQ)

186 Soy Wars has not been popular in China. But Soylo just bombed worst than most in its opening night in China -- only $120,000 for midnight screenings in all of China, a nation of a billion and a half, according to a Chinese film industry analyst


This is key. Overseas box office revenues are a yuuge thing for the movie industry these days. For these big budget blockbuster films, the Chinese audience can make or break it. Kind of ironic if Red China succeeds at getting Red Hollywood to tone down the SJW leftist propagandizing.

Posted by: Hands at May 25, 2018 04:37 PM (EzdLW)

187 179 Doesn't Disney also do the Marvel movies?

- - - -

Disney owns Marvel now, but as far as I know, Kevin Feige and the crew that have been running the MCU are still relatively autonomous.

Posted by: What's a Seawolf? at May 25, 2018 04:37 PM (72PAC)

188

Next movie will by Hogg Wars! Watch brave David Hogg attempt to confiscate blasters across the galaxy

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 25, 2018 04:37 PM (SiINZ)

189 What about that slave dancer in Return of the Jedi? Doesn't SHE rate a movie too????

Posted by: WitchDoktor, AKA VA GOP Sucks at May 25, 2018 04:38 PM (G8hDY)

190
Yes, the Force is Female...

Which is why the Male Jedi Masters keep ending up living in Hovels... in swamps and Deserts... with no real Possessions....

Because the Force got it all in the Divorce...

Posted by: Obi Don Quixote at May 25, 2018 04:32 PM (NgKpN)






*snort*

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at May 25, 2018 04:38 PM (XWkhW)

191


Poor girl has a goofy body. Really short torso with HUGE CANS.


HE HATES THESE CANS!

STAY AWAY FROM THE CANS!

Posted by: Navin Johnson at May 25, 2018 04:38 PM (oVJmc)

192 184LOL true,he even makes it to the Senate...

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:38 PM (LiyEm)

193 I'm saving my money for Leia: The Puberty Years

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at May 25, 2018 04:38 PM (CPfoe)

194 145 The Force is Fat.... that would be an interesting Tshirt....

all the more midichlorians to force choke you with.

Posted by: Anachronda at May 25, 2018 04:39 PM (v3pYe)

195 Haven't watched a Star Wars flick since they ran that Jar Jar Binks clown at me.

Way to ruin a franchise.

Idiots.

Posted by: Bea Arthur's Dick at May 25, 2018 04:39 PM (jWe5r)

196 I think Marvel is going to fuck it up too.They will start adding the SJW versions of the characters.They can't help themselves.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:39 PM (LiyEm)

197 The force is gay for pay.

Posted by: wooga at May 25, 2018 04:40 PM (CBwKQ)

198 "This is key. Overseas box office revenues are a yuuge thing for the movie industry these days. "


Not always. Orca's "A Wrinkle in Time" only brought in $31 million globally.


"Globally, not just here in North America, but worldwide, Wrinkle grossed just $127 million. After tanking out at $96 million domestically, a Disney movie starring Oprah Winfrey was only able to gross an additional $31 million in 20-plus other countries."

Posted by: Surf & Turf at May 25, 2018 04:40 PM (pzRC2)

199 BTW just flat left a non political sports blog I have been frequenting for years because they decided to do a poltical post against the new NFL policy.No comment,no nothing just deleted it from my bookmarks.

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:41 PM (LiyEm)

200 195

Haven't watched a Star Wars flick since they ran that Jar Jar Binks clown at me.

Way to ruin a franchise.

Idiots.
Posted by: Bea Arthur's Dick at May 25, 2018 04:39 PM (jWe5r)

I watched that crapfest, with the snot nosed kid and the frog people.... oh, and the robots, always with the robots.... what a joke of a movie...

Posted by: kraken at May 25, 2018 04:41 PM (zSVEm)

201
145 The Force is Fat.... that would be an interesting Tshirt....


The Force is Bitchy and Retaining Water - Are You Not Entertained?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 25, 2018 04:41 PM (NoLse)

202 STAY AWAY FROM THE CANS!
Posted by: Navin Johnson at May 25, 2018 04:38 PM (oVJmc)


Let's see if we can get more The Jerk quotes than Star Wars quotes in this here Star Wars thread, people. We can make this happen. Godspeed.

Posted by: hogmartin at May 25, 2018 04:41 PM (y87Qq)

203 150 Kathleen Kennedy really has no idea what she's doing. She spent most of her career as an assistant to Steven Spielberg. Now in charge, the only idea she has is to make every 90 pound girl a UFC champion-level badass and make random characters gay (or "pansexual").



Sounds like a receipt for success on putting out good movies
Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 25, 2018 04:31 PM (SiINZ)

Just had a great one happen in the Sword Fighting community...

Guy who was a National Champion a few years ago, was in a 'fun' tournament... and was matched against a female fencer.

She made some comment about how 'his sword was longer'....

So.... he dropped his sword... picked up a dagger... to even things out and make it more of a challenge. He then proceeded to 'kill' her.. and then go on to win the Tourney...

Instead of learning from the situation... she proceeded to bitch in a Female only fencing forum about how 'he was arrogant, and she felt slighted'...


You can't win with these folks... if you treat them as equals they bitch... if you give them a chance they bitch... and if you don't let them play... they bitch...

Posted by: Obi Don Quixote at May 25, 2018 04:41 PM (NgKpN)

204 What about that slave dancer in Return of the Jedi? Doesn't SHE rate a movie too????


"A promising career in vaudeville, tragically interrupted when she was kidnapped by a giant slug"

Yeah. It could work.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at May 25, 2018 04:42 PM (CPfoe)

205 196 I think Marvel is going to fuck it up too.They will start adding the SJW versions of the characters.They can't help themselves.
Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:39 PM (LiyEm)

Unfortunately I think you're correct.

I love the MCU, and it's basically replaced Star Wars for me, but they won't be able to resist the BS for long.

Avengers 4 might be it for me, go out on a high note.

Posted by: What's a Seawolf? at May 25, 2018 04:42 PM (72PAC)

206 Han and Chewy in the shower?

We're talking butt stuff, yes?

Posted by: Megyn Kelly at May 25, 2018 04:42 PM (DuAZ5)

207 "Sharting box office failure all over the back of the toilet"...

LMAO.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at May 25, 2018 04:42 PM (DdV1P)

208 Even EA/Dice have ruined Star Wars games.

Posted by: CDR M at May 25, 2018 04:43 PM (b888X)

209 I hope that Solo is better than I expect it to be, but by now I think everyone knows that Disney doesn't know how to handle the Star Wars product. They're ruining the brand.

They will start adding the SJW versions of the characters.They can't help themselves.

According to Feige, they're already looking at doing so with Muslim Ms Marvel, one of their lowest-selling titles.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 25, 2018 04:44 PM (39g3+)

210 The Force gets bitchy one week a month?

Posted by: Laughing in Texas at May 25, 2018 04:44 PM (xQfPr)

211 And I don't need one other thing, except my dog.

[Jar Jar growls at me]


I don't need my dog.

Posted by: Darth Chipmunk at May 25, 2018 04:45 PM (0/B0s)

212 Han blew his wad first!

Posted by: margaret chobot at May 25, 2018 04:46 PM (Evws/)

213 I just had a thought, ace. Isn't the "coercion" tactic from yesterday's post the game that Republicans have been running on us for years?

Be thieving liberal bastards but every fifth time or so give us a taste of red meat so we keep coming back "just in case" and it "beats the alternative"? Dunno maybe that's just Pavlov.

Posted by: Mega at May 25, 2018 04:47 PM (rv0Fo)

214 @57 They should remake Fantastic Voyage where Anderson Cooper, Don Lemon, and Shep Smith get shrunk down and injected into a body and explore the rectum.
---------------------

If you're feeling like it hasn't been long enough since you needed brain bleach, and if you're not at work, then go to YouTube and search for ' South Park Stick of Truth Snuke'.

Absolutely, positively NSFW! Also not safe for your sanity!

You have been warned!

Posted by: junior at May 25, 2018 04:47 PM (zOFlX)

215 You think those red carpet jedis could maybe use a light saber for some body sculpting? Would that work?

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 04:47 PM (MTjB1)

216 The Rag be with you.

Posted by: margaret chobot at May 25, 2018 04:47 PM (Evws/)

217 Even EA/Dice have ruined Star Wars games.
Posted by: CDR M at May 25, 2018 04:43 PM (b888X)


Not until they break into my house and steal my xbox and copy of Knights of the Old Republic.

Posted by: hogmartin at May 25, 2018 04:47 PM (y87Qq)

218 I know this was mentioned earlier but it belongs in a Soyboy thread.:The most unexpected (and welcome) guest at your next cookout:Carrot Dogs

https://pjmedia.com/instapundit/297759/

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 04:48 PM (LiyEm)

219 210 The Force gets bitchy one week a month?

Posted by: Laughing in Texas at May 25, 2018 04:44 PM (xQfPr)

They argue until they cry, make up, and then they all jump on one and stab her to death.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at May 25, 2018 04:48 PM (DdV1P)

220 only $120,000 for midnight screenings in all of China, a nation of a billion and a half

Well, 90% of China doesn't go to the movies at all; the smog makes it hard to see the screen.

Posted by: mikeski at May 25, 2018 04:49 PM (JGBbg)

221 Muslim woman superhero?

I would think wearing a hijab would be sort of dangerous for a superheroine. Wouldn't it make the evil characters more likely to strangle her with it?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 04:49 PM (vw6r3)

222 How do you get midi-chlorians out of a blue dress?

Posted by: Princess Monica Lewinski Organa at May 25, 2018 04:51 PM (ATVNj)

223
I know this was mentioned earlier but it belongs in a Soyboy thread.:The
most unexpected (and welcome) guest at your next cookout:Carrot Dogs

It figures that the Washington Fucking Post would think this was a good idea.

Posted by: tu3031 at May 25, 2018 04:52 PM (O5Q3r)

224 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook

The failed presidential candidate said that the social media platform is the largest source of news in the world, and she'd like to be in charge of it.

... and I want to do an even better job of destroying the Earth

Posted by: undocumented illegal SMOD at May 25, 2018 04:52 PM (e8kgV)

225 "Han blew his wad first!"

and so it began

Posted by: Human Wookie Hybrid at May 25, 2018 04:53 PM (Tnijr)

226 On SJW robots: I am all for it, if it means we no longer have SJW people. You can shut off a robot.
Posted by: Joe Mannix (Not a cop!) at May 25, 2018 04:14 PM (I2dne)
----
Well, it's actually pretty easy to turn off people, too.

Turning 'em back on is the hard part. Christians say it's been done once, though.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at May 25, 2018 04:53 PM (UiRxW)

227 @217
Not until they break into my house and steal my xbox and copy of Knights of the Old Republic.
---------------------

I'm guessng you don't want to hear about what they've been doing with The Old Republic.

Posted by: junior at May 25, 2018 04:54 PM (zOFlX)

228 225 "Han blew his wad first!"

and so it began
_______________________________

Han job?

Posted by: Princess Monica Lewinski Organa at May 25, 2018 04:54 PM (ATVNj)

229 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook

Is the Clinton Crime family going to bump off Marky Z.?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 04:54 PM (vw6r3)

230 Instead of learning from the situation... she proceeded to bitch in a Female only fencing forum about how 'he was arrogant, and she felt slighted'...

I imagine he "felt slighted" by having an opponent who didn't belong in the tournament and was wasting his and the entire tourney's time.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 25, 2018 04:54 PM (39g3+)

231 When do I get my backstory?

Posted by: Kyle Lowrent at May 25, 2018 04:54 PM (Tnijr)

232 So the next movie is Soyba Fett?

Posted by: Anna Puma at May 25, 2018 04:55 PM (jDqdz)

233 I thought this brand was ruined like 5 or so movies ago. I guess I am not their demo. Saw a bumper sticker the other day it said "Support the Troops" and pictured a line of Storm Troopers. I guess that guy is their demo.

Posted by: Quint at May 25, 2018 04:55 PM (n13/j)

234 IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE SAYING THE FORCE DOES THINGS THAT WOMEN STEREOTYPICALLY DO ALSO I HAVE DISCARDED MY FLESH CARCASS AND TRANSCENDED BOTH TIME AND SPACE AND CEASED TO BE MERELY HUMAN

Posted by: ɹǝƃɹǝqsıןɥʇǝoɹ uǝq at May 25, 2018 04:55 PM (y87Qq)

235 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook



Is the Clinton Crime family going to bump off Marky Z.?

Yeah? Well I ain't no bandleader!

Posted by: Marky Z at May 25, 2018 04:55 PM (O5Q3r)

236 And was the eponymous character actually the main character of the flick? Or did it devolve into annoying PC bullshit distractions? Just because they throw in
some action doesn't mean it's a "straight up action flick". Are the annoying PC distractions enough to ruin the flick for someone who just wants an entertaining action flick?
Posted by: the Force at May 25, 2018 04:35 PM (/qEW2)
----
I personally didn't feel it was PC. Q'ira was not a kickazz chick. Lando did not fuk the robot. I could have done without the freckle-faced waif rebel leader at the end, but I hate earnest do-gooders because I'm an awful person.

If you want to be angry at a movie you haven't seen, then go right ahead.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at May 25, 2018 04:55 PM (qJtVm)

237 ...once Soylo gets done sharting box office failure all over the back of the toilet.

You're never too far from poetry at AoS...

Posted by: t-bird at May 25, 2018 04:56 PM (w1zJX)

238 @221
I would think wearing a hijab would be sort of dangerous for a superheroine. Wouldn't it make the evil characters more likely to strangle her with it
------------------

NO HIJABS!

Posted by: Edna Mode at May 25, 2018 04:56 PM (zOFlX)

239 235 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook
______________________________________

In charge of cybersecurity?

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at May 25, 2018 04:56 PM (ATVNj)

240 They still make star wars movies? I thought the last one was in the early '80s.

Posted by: Fritz at May 25, 2018 04:56 PM (J7XgW)

241 I'm guessng you don't want to hear about what they've been doing with The Old Republic.
Posted by: junior at May 25, 2018 04:54 PM (zOFlX)


If it's anything worse than KotOR II being slightly garbage, then nah, I'm good not knowing.

Posted by: hogmartin at May 25, 2018 04:57 PM (y87Qq)

242 Are my eyes really getting that bad or is Ben upside down?

Posted by: f'd at May 25, 2018 04:57 PM (Tnijr)

243 102 And in Rogue One they had the ancient practitioners of The Force be akin to being a couple of Buddhist monks, with a little bromance vibes.

hmm. i was under the impression that they were the ones who didn't quite make the grade, but hung around the temple anyway doing grunt work like running the projectors and guarding the doors.

Posted by: Anachronda at May 25, 2018 04:57 PM (v3pYe)

244 I'm in my early 80s.

Posted by: Harrison Ford at May 25, 2018 04:57 PM (ATVNj)

245 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook

Yeah, you wanted to be President, too.

Posted by: Mark Zuckleberry at May 25, 2018 04:57 PM (w1zJX)

246 I don't know why anyone would make prequels. Audience members, going into the theatre, know that none of the characters are in any real danger, since they're in the original movie.

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at May 25, 2018 04:58 PM (l9m7l)

247 Without the helmet, D. Vader looked like Uncle Fester.

Posted by: Burger Chef at May 25, 2018 04:58 PM (RuIsu)

248 the left ruins everything.



ruining hollywood is like a snake eating its tail.

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 04:58 PM (MTjB1)

249 Shouldn't it be "The Force Is Feminine"? Cause "the Force" isn't actually a person. Lucas is way too West Coast Cool for that.

Posted by: Caliban at May 25, 2018 04:58 PM (QE8X6)

250 234 you owe me a dry keyboard

Posted by: the Butcher at May 25, 2018 04:58 PM (DIosY)

251 I don't see it talked about much, but they alienated a lot of fans even before they started this empowerment bullshit by discarding the entire Extended Universe library so they could toss in their agenda. Some of the Aaron Alston, Stackhouse, even the Denning stuff was pretty good...and actually made sense when attached to the original trilogy. Some of the books were extremely good (I, Jedi). Some sucked, but at least were entertaining. And Lando didn't fuck lizards or buckets or whatever a pansexual sticks it in.

Posted by: Orson at May 25, 2018 04:58 PM (gYUPt)

252 >>>I think Marvel is going to fuck it up too.They will start adding the SJW versions of the characters.They can't help themselves.

steevy, Kevin Fegie knows this, that's why he's wrapping up the first 10 years of Marvel with a symbolic "ending" in the form of Avengers 3 and 4.

Posted by: Lando Calrisian officially at May 25, 2018 04:59 PM (q177U)

253 ALSO I HAVE DISCARDED MY FLESH CARCASS AND TRANSCENDED BOTH TIME AND SPACE AND CEASED TO BE MERELY HUMAN
----
Amazing. Lol x2.

Posted by: Yudhishthira's Dice at May 25, 2018 04:59 PM (UiRxW)

254 the force has penis envy.

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 04:59 PM (MTjB1)

255 This is the best Star Wars film this year!
This is the finest Stars film since Last Jedi! (seriously, Rotten Tomatoes actually has that as a headline)
This is the best Star Wars film starring Alden Ehrenreich!

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 25, 2018 04:59 PM (39g3+)

256 The woke robot is the very worst part. The franchise can't help itself at this point.

I found it diverting and forgettable ... less PC than The Last Jedi for sure ... but also unnecessary.

Posted by: Christian Toto at May 25, 2018 04:59 PM (GppXG)

257 Without the helmet, D. Vader looked like Uncle Fester.
-------

https://tinyurl.com/ybpfmg46

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at May 25, 2018 05:00 PM (qJtVm)

258 BIGGS: the story of Biggs Darklighter, real hero of A New Hope, coming in 2021!

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at May 25, 2018 05:00 PM (39g3+)

259 The force is for pussies. Real men use blasters.

Posted by: Hans Olo at May 25, 2018 05:00 PM (Tnijr)

260 Lando did not fuk the robot.
--------
I'm "fully functional" IYKWIM... I'll peg Shep the next time he makes landfall.

Posted by: margaret chobot at May 25, 2018 05:01 PM (Evws/)

261 Took the kids 16 17 to it last night. Fortunately it was at a Cinemark theatre with leather recliners and a full bar. Way too long. OK movie but the actor who plays Solo is a Tom Cruise-esque midget. Looks tiny next to the towering 5'10" Woody.

I hated spending the money but it is a tradition with the High School age kids. Did I mention it was too freakin' long. 9:40 movie 3 miles away and we got home at 12:40 AM. Most likely my final payment to the Disney dynasty as the kids will be in college for the next abomination and they can go without me.

Posted by: Timon at May 25, 2018 05:01 PM (NTM5E)

262 >>Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook


That is just so perfect. Of course she says Facebook, because she would have all that real-time surveillance, all that personal data to mine, all those user she could bombard with her preferred narratives, and then use it to get more power, make more money.

Posted by: Lizzy at May 25, 2018 05:02 PM (W+vEI)

263 Shouldn't it be "The Force Is Feminine"?

Wrong time of the month for that shit, buddy!

Posted by: The Female Force at May 25, 2018 05:02 PM (QxXRY)

264 The star wars universe won't be complete with Morgan Freeman and Tom Hanks in supporting roles.

Posted by: Fritz at May 25, 2018 05:02 PM (J7XgW)

265 Those grrrlzzzz are not 90 pounds

Just saying

Posted by: LASue


The second one is.

In her bra!

Posted by: Jim Carrey, as Fletcher Reede at May 25, 2018 05:03 PM (JGBbg)

266 originally the woke robot was supposed to have a threesome with c3pio and r2d2.

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:03 PM (MTjB1)

267 der. with = without

Posted by: Fritz at May 25, 2018 05:03 PM (J7XgW)

268 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook





That is just so perfect. Of course she says Facebook, because she
would have all that real-time surveillance, all that personal data to
mine, all those user she could bombard with her preferred narratives,
and then use it to get more power, make more money.

Posted by: Lizzy at May 25, 2018 05:02 PM (W+vEI)

And still many conservatives would stick with the platform as essential.

Posted by: Quint at May 25, 2018 05:04 PM (n13/j)

269 originally the woke robot was supposed to have a threesome with c3pio and r2d2.
Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:03 PM (MTjB1)

I C what you did there. But C+ wanted more action so he added one more.

Posted by: Lando Calrisian officially at May 25, 2018 05:05 PM (q177U)

270
215 You think those red carpet jedis could maybe use a light saber for some body sculpting? Would that work?

a heavy saber might be more appropriate.

i denounce myself.

Posted by: Anachronda at May 25, 2018 05:05 PM (v3pYe)

271 I don't know why anyone would make prequels. Audience members, going into the theatre, know that none of the characters are in any real danger, since they're in the original movie.
Posted by: BeckoningChasm


Same.

Prequels have strikes against them going in; there's no mystery, no danger. Part of what makes genre films fun is that anything could happen, but not with a prequel.

The writer is stuck on a track and isn't ever going to be able to go outside of it.

And it kind of violates Hemingway's story principle; 90% of good story is 'under the water' - not explicitly told.

It's not really making the story more interesting, you're just revealing more of what really didn't need to be told.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at May 25, 2018 05:05 PM (LNPd9)

272 I would think wearing a hijab would be sort of
dangerous for a superheroine. Wouldn't it make the evil characters more
likely to strangle her with it?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 04:49 PM (vw6r3)

NO HAJIB!!

Posted by: Edna Mode at May 25, 2018 05:06 PM (NTM5E)

273
224 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook

The failed presidential candidate said that the social media platform is the largest source of news in the world, and she'd like to be in charge of it.


Trump should buy it and freeze her out of the opportunity.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at May 25, 2018 05:06 PM (NoLse)

274 Even Kennedys who aren't "The Kennedys" just suck.

Posted by: josephistan at May 25, 2018 05:07 PM (ANIFC)

275 "Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook "

She wanted to be President of the United States too.

Posted by: f'd at May 25, 2018 05:08 PM (Tnijr)

276 I'm nestling my testicles in the Force at this very moment.

Posted by: Han Soylo at May 25, 2018 05:08 PM (J7XgW)

277 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook
------

And I want world peace. I don't think either of us is going to get what we want.

Posted by: bluebell at May 25, 2018 05:08 PM (oMtOd)

278 All the original Star Wars characters are dead or the actors who played them are.

What they're trying to sell is a completely 'new' set of characters or to rehash a few like Soylo with new actors.

But the emotional ties there with the longtime fans? Gone.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 25, 2018 05:09 PM (oVJmc)

279 originally the woke robot was supposed to have a threesome with c3pio and r2d2.
------
Like I'd touch one of those penisbots!

Posted by: margaret chobot at May 25, 2018 05:09 PM (Evws/)

280 Star Wars is only Mystery School religion wrapped up in a story. It's always been overrated (the original trilogy) and now it's pure propaganda and social engineering.

And now they killed the best characters in Han and Chewy because of course they did.

And who gives a shit about a Boba Fett movie.

Die Disney, Die.

Posted by: Monk at May 25, 2018 05:10 PM (9acFt)

281 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook


The only thing Hillary has ever run well is her pantyhose.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 25, 2018 05:10 PM (oVJmc)

282

Sorry to be the OT boy today:

Today, the Borzoi Club of America awarded Her Majesty their 2018 AKC Outstanding Sportsmanship Medallion.

"This award honors those individuals who deserve special recognition that have made a difference in the sport of purebred dogs, embodied the AKC Code of Sportsmanship, and have been an active and valued member of an AKC member club."

Can't imagine a more worthy recipient.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 25, 2018 05:10 PM (Qk7Tb)

283 90-pound bad-ass female all-conquering warriors doesn't seem so strange in a franchise that features "light sabers" when guys can shoot each other from miles away with their photon blasters. It was always just a way to get sword-fighting into the movies like the beloved swashbucklers of old. Although Mark Hamill isn't exactly Errol Flynn.

Posted by: Caliban at May 25, 2018 05:10 PM (QE8X6)

284 Like I'd touch one of those penisbots!
Posted by: margaret chobot at May




well, before margaret cho was lesbian she apparently was known for being very amenable to providing favors.

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:11 PM (MTjB1)

285 And who gives a shit about a Boba Fett movie.

Boba Fett isn't a character, he's a costume.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 25, 2018 05:11 PM (oVJmc)

286 Killary as Fakebook CEO would be classic.

"And I'll sell your information, and yours and yours. You go girl.

Posted by: Ben Had at May 25, 2018 05:11 PM (LH8Hn)

287 280 Chewy is alive but kind of pathetic without Han

Posted by: steevy at May 25, 2018 05:11 PM (LiyEm)

288 Let the Wookie have the Loofa.

Posted by: Lando at May 25, 2018 05:12 PM (axuXF)

289 >>> Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook

This has to be Fake News. Right?

Posted by: Monk at May 25, 2018 05:12 PM (9acFt)

290 The failed presidential candidate said that the social media platform is the largest source of news in the world, and she'd like to be in charge of it.

Here's our chance to be rid of Facebook.

Posted by: t-bird at May 25, 2018 05:13 PM (nBBdT)

291
The nice thing about Soylo is that he'll fondle our balls

without us having to go thru that lame dog competition stuff.


Posted by: Show Dogs at May 25, 2018 05:13 PM (9q7Dl)

292 >> Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook


Macedonian Content Farmville

Posted by: Lando at May 25, 2018 05:13 PM (axuXF)

293 Wow, Hadrian! Congrats to your wife. That's wonderful.

Posted by: bluebell at May 25, 2018 05:15 PM (oMtOd)

294 >>>Boba Fett isn't a character, he's a costume.<<<
They plan on make Boba Fetta the first transplatform AI with bidirectional exhaust manifold.

Posted by: Han Soylo at May 25, 2018 05:15 PM (J7XgW)

295 They made the Tampax run in 8 parsexs.

Posted by: Minnfidel at May 25, 2018 05:15 PM (3c1uO)

296 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook

I bet she does. Just imagine what she could do with all that data and personal information on a billion people.

Posted by: rickl at May 25, 2018 05:15 PM (xjiRE)

297 known for being very amenable to providing favors.
------
That's for the prequel.

Posted by: margaret chobot at May 25, 2018 05:15 PM (Evws/)

298 OT but I finally got to meet a moron!! NaCly and his sweet wife came by my event today! Any Kansas City area morons, if you don't have much going on tomorrow come by and see me!!! Now I have met one I want to meet more!

Posted by: Jewells45 at May 25, 2018 05:15 PM (dUJdY)

299
What is it that makes the force female? boobs or vag.

Either way, you feel the force. Feel it.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 25, 2018 05:15 PM (r+sAi)

300 @278

It's even more sinister than that.

The are using the Star Wars stories to slipstream their SJW bullshit into the culture Trojan Horse style.

They did the same shit with Mad Max.

Nobody is going to see an Imperator Furiosa flick but people will see a new Mad Max and then BAM you get a supine disposable Max and a kickass world beater chick.

These people are evil.

Posted by: Kreplach at May 25, 2018 05:16 PM (UfMVm)

301 And who gives a shit about a Boba Fett movie.

Posted by: Monk

Unless it stars MC Chris, it will suck bantha cock by choice.

Posted by: Prince Ludwig the Deplorable at May 25, 2018 05:16 PM (f3MDZ)

302 http://bit.ly/2LuReaf
===
Michael Sheridan on Twitter: "INCOMING!!!! More Halper Contract Info! Last Payment September 2016"

Posted by: Internet Tough Guy at May 25, 2018 05:16 PM (y3aQB)

303 I suposed Hillary could find some way to do some ever so subtle threatening of Mark Zuckerberg (Give me a high position at your company or I'll get you killed!) but I don't think he'd hand over being CEO to her.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 05:16 PM (vw6r3)

304 Jewells, that's great! Salty is one of the few Morons I've met. Isn't he a sweety? Wish I had met Mrs. Salty but she wasn't here.

Posted by: bluebell at May 25, 2018 05:16 PM (oMtOd)

305 Saw TLJ on an airplane. After about an hour, I caught myself looking at the Emergency Exit and wondering how much force it would take to throw that handle...

Posted by: Gridlock at May 25, 2018 05:17 PM (VCSKZ)

306 Hadrian, Congratulations! Can't wait to hear how Finn does.

Posted by: Ben Had at May 25, 2018 05:17 PM (LH8Hn)

307 What is it that makes the force female? boobs or vag.

Either way, you feel the force. Feel it.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk

If you have enough midiclorians, the Force will let you grab it by the pussy.

Posted by: Donny Wan Trumpnobi at May 25, 2018 05:17 PM (f3MDZ)

308 They made the Tampax run in 8 parsexs.
-------
I was leaking oil all over!

Posted by: margaret chobot at May 25, 2018 05:17 PM (Evws/)

309 I suposed Hillary could find some way to do some ever so subtle threatening of Mark Zuckerberg (Give me a high position at your company or I'll get you killed!) but I don't think he'd hand over being CEO to her.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 05:16 PM

Nah, her style is more like. Make a big donation to my "charity" cough cough, or I'll have you disappeared.

Posted by: Minnfidel at May 25, 2018 05:18 PM (3c1uO)

310 Salty is one of the few Morons I've met.

Posted by: bluebell at May 25, 2018 05:16 PM (oMtOd)

You're a Red Sox fan.

I'm sure you have met lots of morons.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 25, 2018 05:18 PM (wYseH)

311 Yes he is bluebell and he mentioned he had met you. Had only nice things to say

Posted by: Jewells45 at May 25, 2018 05:18 PM (dUJdY)

312 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook

I want to be the closer for the Red Sox.

Posted by: tu3031 at May 25, 2018 05:19 PM (O5Q3r)

313 282---
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 25, 2018 05:10 PM (Qk7Tb)
-----------------------
That is really a nice award. Actually means something.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at May 25, 2018 05:19 PM (0jtPF)

314 290 The failed presidential candidate said that the social media platform is the largest source of news in the world, and she'd like to be in charge of it.

Here's our chance to be rid of Facebook.
Posted by: t-bird at May 25, 2018 05:13 PM (nBBdT)

The Unprotected class needs to hurry up and wake the fuck up so she and her ilk can serve out their remaining days on GITMO in a padded cell to premvent this nightmare from happening.

Posted by: Monk at May 25, 2018 05:19 PM (9acFt)

315 Second from the left has a lot more force than the others in that pic.

Posted by: Make Katy Perry Stop Murdering Nuns! at May 25, 2018 05:19 PM (yNlrm)

316 I'm sure you have met lots of morons.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 25, 2018 05:18 PM (wYseH)
----------

Hey! That's not true. I've never met a single Yankees fan.

At least, none that would admit to it.

Posted by: bluebell at May 25, 2018 05:19 PM (oMtOd)

317 The Force is female.

And if you have a lot of midichlorians, the Force lets you grab it by the p***y.

Posted by: mikeski at May 25, 2018 05:19 PM (JGBbg)

318 >>>232 So the next movie is Soyba Fett?

Boba Fetch

Posted by: wooga at May 25, 2018 05:20 PM (CBwKQ)

319 Bobba Fett was born female but had the transformation operation. He forgot to mention that when they picked him to be cloned. That's why all those Storm Troopers shoot like girls.

Posted by: Ha Snowlo at May 25, 2018 05:20 PM (Tnijr)

320 Great, kid! Please get cocky. By all means, please get cocky!

Posted by: Han Soylo at May 25, 2018 05:20 PM (J7XgW)

321 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook


Yea well you also wanted to be President sweetie. Poop in one hand, wish in the other. keep whining though ya' crooked hag.

Posted by: Minnfidel at May 25, 2018 05:20 PM (3c1uO)

322 Posted by: Donny Wan Trumpnobi at May 25, 2018 05:17 PM (f3MDZ)

High-Five!

Posted by: mikeski at May 25, 2018 05:21 PM (JGBbg)

323 The Force is Into Butt Stuff

Posted by: wooga at May 25, 2018 05:21 PM (CBwKQ)

324 Hope they go broke.

Posted by: katya the designated driver at May 25, 2018 05:22 PM (2ZUTy)

325 Yea well you also wanted to be President sweetie. Poop in one hand, wish in the other.
Posted by: Minnfidel at May 25, 2018 05:20 PM (3c1uO)


This, but without the "wish in the other" part.

Posted by: hogmartin at May 25, 2018 05:22 PM (y87Qq)

326 Oh, just shut the fuck up Mark Meadows, you're terrible.

Either impeach Rosenstein and Sessions or shut the fuck up, now you're just performing a bit of failure theater.

Posted by: Kreplach at May 25, 2018 05:22 PM (UfMVm)

327 296 Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook

I bet she does. Just imagine what she could do with all that data and personal information on a billion people.
Posted by: rickl at May 25, 2018 05:15 PM (xjiRE)

Make the Geogia GuideStones a reality on earth.

Posted by: Monk at May 25, 2018 05:22 PM (9acFt)

328 With Consent, The Force is unnecessary.

Posted by: garrett at May 25, 2018 05:22 PM (axuXF)

329 282---
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 25, 2018 05:10 PM (Qk7Tb)

Congratulations to your wife and you. Seems to me it's a shared honor since she couldn't do what she does without all your hard work.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 05:22 PM (vw6r3)

330
fact: too much soy give boys man-boobies. soy has estrogen.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at May 25, 2018 05:22 PM (r+sAi)

331
Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook

They could change the name to Felonbook

Posted by: Flawless Male Logic at May 25, 2018 05:23 PM (10vO4)

332 ***BREAKING***

Impressed with Hogg's extortion of cash from Publix, Hillary (who you would think could not be impressed by anyone's criminal acts) has adopted the blackmail approach, and announced she wants Zuckerberg's CEO slot at Facebook. She is already picking out office furniture.

Zuck, thinking his position as founder and controlling shareholder makes his job secure, responded by sending her a membership in Daily Vodka Delivery (a new Facebook service created just for Hillz) and laughing with his board over the whole thing.

They, sadly, weren't laughing back. I wonder if he noticed?

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Vigilance Committee supporter at May 25, 2018 05:23 PM (QEXYi)

333 The Force is Into Butt Stuff

Bad force. Naughty naughty bad force

Posted by: Hans Golo at May 25, 2018 05:24 PM (Tnijr)

334 fact: too much soy give boys man-boobies. soy has estrogen.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk

It also results in poor sexual performance, giving the wife/girlfriend the need to seek out The Paolo.

Posted by: Prince Ludwig the Deplorable at May 25, 2018 05:24 PM (f3MDZ)

335 My youngest had never seen the original. So we watched it a few weeks back. A few things stuck out. It was pretty well done considering the time, the special effects were pretty damn good. There was some cheesy stuff, but it holds up. I forgot what a smoke show Carrie Fisher was.

Posted by: Minnfidel at May 25, 2018 05:24 PM (3c1uO)

336 >>Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook

LOL. We should all be for it. Make Obama Chairman of the Board and Facebook would be out of business in 18 months.

On the plus side she does have ll of that bathroom server IT experience. She really managed that well.

Posted by: Keith at May 25, 2018 05:24 PM (USf3s)

337 should have known the horde already had the Hillary news. That's what I get for being slow.

Posted by: Huck Follywood, Vigilance Committee supporter at May 25, 2018 05:25 PM (QEXYi)

338 >>>258 BIGGS: the story of Biggs Darklighter, real hero of A New Hope, coming in 2021!

Suck it biggs.

Posted by: Wedge Antilles at May 25, 2018 05:25 PM (CBwKQ)

339 fact: too much soy give boys man-boobies. soy has estrogen.

I'm just hoping to unlock "multi-orgasmic" before they get to C-cups.

Posted by: David Hogg at May 25, 2018 05:25 PM (JGBbg)

340 The Chick Force. We'll off you with our headlights!

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at May 25, 2018 05:26 PM (DdV1P)

341 "...cucked-out movies where all the women are bad-ass and decisive and all the men are ineffectual Pajama Boys and pansexuals..."

So, basically, a cinematic version of a cough syrup commercial, where only the mom knows that cough syrup is what coughing kids need, but dad doesn't even know where the spoons are.

We've had decades of programming.

Posted by: RKae at May 25, 2018 05:26 PM (IYUKP)

342 Hope Solo: A Sarlaac Pit Story

Posted by: wooga at May 25, 2018 05:26 PM (CBwKQ)

343 328 With Consent, The Force is unnecessary.
Posted by: garrett at May 25, 2018 05:22 PM (axuXF)

Consent can be revoked the next day or week or year. You may want to rethink that strategy in The Current Year.

Posted by: Monk at May 25, 2018 05:26 PM (9acFt)

344 Congratulations to your wife and you. Seems to me it's a shared honor since she couldn't do what she does without all your hard work.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 05:22 PM (vw6r3)
---------

I thought the very same thing but you put it into words, perfectly.

Posted by: bluebell at May 25, 2018 05:27 PM (oMtOd)

345 Obi Wan: I sence a great disturbance in the Force.
Luke: What is it?
Obi Wan: I don't know. If you ask it, it says "if you don't know, I'm not telling you."

Posted by: Prince Ludwig the Deplorable at May 25, 2018 05:27 PM (f3MDZ)

346
Saw "Black Panther".
So what was the box office hype all about?
I found it the weakest of the Marvel universe movies.
I give it a meh rating.

Posted by: YIKES! at May 25, 2018 05:27 PM (t6XCL)

347 So, basically, a cinematic version of a cough syrup commercial, where only the mom knows that cough syrup is what coughing kids need, but dad doesn't even know where the spoons are.

We've had decades of programming.
Posted by: RKae at May 25, 2018 05:26 PM

Yep. Every commercial, sitcom etc.

Posted by: Minnfidel at May 25, 2018 05:27 PM (3c1uO)

348 With Consent, The Force is unnecessary.
Posted by: garrett


Use The Force to choke a bitch out and go to jail.

Unless you're Christian Gray. Then it's all high fives and squeals of delight.

Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 05:28 PM (3oX+R)

349 ...before everyone blows home for the day.

---

We still doing phrasing?

Posted by: SMH - Get right or get left at May 25, 2018 05:29 PM (7qyhD)

350 Saw it, Meh.
No real excitement. You really didn't want to root for anyone or against anyone. Everyone was pretty much an ass and you did not care what happened to them.
I did not mind the Robot Rights Droid because it was up front and honest about it...and it did lead to one of the funnier scenes when it caused a robot revolt.
Like the Last Jedi, there was a ship trick introduced that makes you go. "If that works, why don't people do that all the time?"

On my personal movie scale, I am not upset at the $6.50 I paid and the two hours and change it took to watch it. I would watch it again if it came on TV but I will not be buying a DVD of it.

Posted by: JB1000 at May 25, 2018 05:29 PM (ECkAC)

351 276 I'm nestling my testicles in the Force at this very moment.

the force? you're nestling in it!

Posted by: Madge at May 25, 2018 05:29 PM (sGtp+)

352 I want my star wars movies filled with empowering female characters really badly!

Posted by: Comey's wife at May 25, 2018 05:29 PM (RbV5J)

353 The Robot Chicken Boba Fett pieces were better than anything Disney could ever do with the character. (Boba in the Sarlec, for example)

Posted by: Tom Servo at May 25, 2018 05:29 PM (k1TUh)

354 Obi Wan: I don't know. If you ask it, it says "if you don't know, I'm not telling you."
Posted by: Prince Ludwig the Deplorable at May 25, 2018 05:27 PM (f3MDZ)


*turns away, angrily adjusts hair scrunchie*

Posted by: The Force at May 25, 2018 05:30 PM (y87Qq)

355 The force is female. Harumpf. How binary of them. Why isn't the force genderfluid?

Posted by: Social Justice Wars at May 25, 2018 05:30 PM (qcrxS)

356 348 With Consent, The Force is unnecessary.
Posted by: garrett


Use The Force to choke a bitch out and go to jail.

Unless you're Christian Gray. Then it's all high fives and squeals of delight.
Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 05:28 PM (3oX+R)

Even that is changing. Nobody is safe. False allegations have zero consequences.

Posted by: Monk at May 25, 2018 05:30 PM (9acFt)

357 The Chick Force. We'll off you with our headlights!
Posted by: Cannibal Bob


The Chick-fil A force: Makes you drive a hundred miles for a H8 shake.

Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 05:30 PM (3oX+R)

358

Congratulations to your wife and you. Seems to me it's a shared honor since she couldn't do what she does without all your hard work.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 05:22 PM (vw6r3)


Thank you, Fen. Someday I will put up a Monument of the Unknown Show Husband, except that's a redundancy. Her Majesty is the brains of the operation. And a babe.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at May 25, 2018 05:30 PM (pawu0)

359 Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 05:28 PM (3oX+R)

To be fair, I think there were millions and millions of women who had no interest in reading that "Shades of Grey" dreck or in seeing the movies. I was one of them, nor did I or anyone I know read see the movies.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 05:31 PM (vw6r3)

360 So, the Force can't kill its own spiders?

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 25, 2018 05:31 PM (oVJmc)

361 >>Hillary Clinton Wants to Be CEO of Facebook

---

Lord...

Please let this happen.

Amen.

Posted by: SMH - Get right or get left at May 25, 2018 05:31 PM (7qyhD)

362 359-Meant "see the movies".

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 05:32 PM (vw6r3)

363 To be fair, I think there were millions and millions of women who had no interest in reading that "Shades of Grey" dreck or in seeing the movies. I was one of them, nor did I or anyone I know read see the movies.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 05:31 PM (vw6r3)

---

*fistbump*

Not even my daughters read that dreck.

Posted by: SMH - Get right or get left at May 25, 2018 05:32 PM (7qyhD)

364
The Force - Does this light saber make me look fat?

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 25, 2018 05:33 PM (SiINZ)

365 Prolapse IV: A New Hope Soylo

Posted by: Han Soylo at May 25, 2018 05:33 PM (J7XgW)

366 Pics of Hillary at GP.

The one looks like she is a body just dropped into a mechanized shell. Some huge protrusion at her shoulders/back.

Another of her walking, and you can just see the stiffened, doddering gait. Notice the hands too.

https://preview.tinyurl.com/y8tznxj2

Posted by: Bicentennialguy at May 25, 2018 05:33 PM (nILVB)

367 Fen..never read the book, never saw the movies. Absolutely no interest to.

Posted by: Jewells45 at May 25, 2018 05:33 PM (dUJdY)

368 To be fair, I think there were millions and millions of women who had no interest in reading that "Shades of Grey" dreck or in seeing the movies. I was one of them, nor did I or anyone I know read see the movies.
Posted by: FenelonSpoke

I don't think there were many men in that 80 million sales figure for the book.

Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 05:33 PM (3oX+R)

369 I've nothing further to add.

Posted by: NALNAMSAM - not as lean, not as mean, but still a Marine at May 25, 2018 05:33 PM (YPXVU)

370

So when Obi Wan told Luke to "use the force" was that a #MeToo moment?

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 25, 2018 05:34 PM (SiINZ)

371 We're going to need a Spaceballs remake, now. The Schwartz vs. whatever they call the new female version.

(Chance of anything like that coming out of today's Hollyweird, though? zero.)

Posted by: mikeski at May 25, 2018 05:34 PM (JGBbg)

372 Meeso embarrassed now for Star Wars franchise.

Posted by: Jar Jar Binks at May 25, 2018 05:34 PM (H8S+R)

373 357 The Chick Force. We'll off you with our headlights!
Posted by: Cannibal Bob


The Chick-fil A force: Makes you drive a hundred miles for a H8 shake.
Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 05:30 PM (3oX+R)

Ete mor chikin, Luke.

Posted by: Cows Everywhere at May 25, 2018 05:34 PM (7PQBV)

374 SMH, wandering around thru the ONT, saw you made mention of coming for the MoMee?

I can but hope.

Posted by: Ben Had at May 25, 2018 05:34 PM (LH8Hn)

375 Fen..never read the book, never saw the movies. Absolutely no interest to.
Posted by: Jewells45 at May 25, 2018 05:33 PM (dUJdY)
--------

Same, same and same.

Posted by: bluebell at May 25, 2018 05:34 PM (oMtOd)

376 The one looks like she is a body just dropped into a mechanized shell. Some huge protrusion at her shoulders/back.
----
Her leathery wings are tucked under the exoskeleton.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at May 25, 2018 05:35 PM (qJtVm)

377 Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 05:33 PM (3oX+R)

No, of course not. My point was there are probably 80 million or more women who didn't see it or buy the books.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 05:35 PM (vw6r3)

378 Pics of Hillary at GP.


Imagine what her health would be like after 18 months of a Presidential schedule.


Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 25, 2018 05:35 PM (oVJmc)

379 Wait, how can the Force be female? Lightsabers never change colors; shouldn't they automatically coordinate with the wielder's outfit?

Posted by: mikeski at May 25, 2018 05:36 PM (JGBbg)

380 366 Pics of Hillary at GP.

The one looks like she is a body just dropped into a mechanized shell. Some huge protrusion at her shoulders/back.

Another of her walking, and you can just see the stiffened, doddering gait. Notice the hands too.

https://preview.tinyurl.com/y8tznxj2
Posted by: Bicentennialguy at May 25, 2018 05:33 PM (nILVB)

---

The ex-ex said, when either Yale or Harvard called her a transformer, "Must be a Decepticon."

More than meets the eye, indeed.

Posted by: SMH - Get right or get left at May 25, 2018 05:36 PM (7qyhD)

381 hope someone does some porn version of this soon.

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:36 PM (MTjB1)

382 We're going to need a Spaceballs remake, now. The Schwartz vs. whatever they call the new female version.

(Chance of anything like that coming out of today's Hollyweird, though? zero.)
Posted by: mikeski


Mel Brooks doesn't need Hollywood's money to make it.

Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 05:36 PM (3oX+R)

383 Wait, how can the Force be female? Lightsabers never change colors; shouldn't they automatically coordinate with the wielder's outfit?
Posted by: mikeski at May 25, 2018 05:36 PM (JGBbg)
--------

Don't be silly. Everyone knows that if you buy them in a neutral color, they'll go with everything.

Posted by: bluebell at May 25, 2018 05:37 PM (oMtOd)

384 374 SMH, wandering around thru the ONT, saw you made mention of coming for the MoMee?

I can but hope.
Posted by: Ben Had at May 25, 2018 05:34 PM (LH8Hn)

---

Looking like 70-30 right now

Posted by: SMH - Get right or get left at May 25, 2018 05:37 PM (7qyhD)

385 (Chance of anything like that coming out of today's Hollyweird, though? zero.)
Posted by: mikeski

Mel Brooks was planning on doing a Spaceballs sequel a while back but canned the idea when Gene Wilder died.

Posted by: Prince Ludwig the Deplorable at May 25, 2018 05:37 PM (f3MDZ)

386 so, since the force is female is there going to be an easy bake oven light saber mashup?


who is handling the cross-merchandising with light saber dildo?

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:38 PM (MTjB1)

387 ...depends on how much the left wants to push this trainwreck...

Posted by: SMH - Get right or get left at May 25, 2018 05:38 PM (7qyhD)

388 Still waiting for the Jar Jar Binks musical.

Posted by: Richard Parker at May 25, 2018 05:39 PM (bPcat)

389


Mel Brooks was planning on doing a Spaceballs sequel a while back but canned the idea when Gene Wilder died.


?

Wilder wasn't in it.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 25, 2018 05:39 PM (oVJmc)

390 "Pics of Hillary at GP."

Hillary will soon look like Star Trek's Captain Christopher Pike after the radiation. Do they make scarves large enough to cover mobile life-support systems?

Posted by: AnonyBotymousDrivel at May 25, 2018 05:40 PM (H8S+R)

391 the same misogynist fuckers that ruined the ghostbusters reboot are going to ruin this too.

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:40 PM (MTjB1)

392 Mel Brooks was planning on doing a Spaceballs sequel a while back but canned the idea when Gene Wilder died.
Posted by: Prince Ludwig the Deplorable


Still waiting for History of the World Part II.

Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 05:40 PM (3oX+R)

393 who is handling the cross-merchandising with light saber dildo?
Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:38 PM (MTjB1)


I don't even have to do a web search for that to know that Rules 34 and 36 are in effect.

Posted by: hogmartin at May 25, 2018 05:40 PM (y87Qq)

394 this is what happens when you do not have guys like harvey weinstein doing the casting.

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:41 PM (MTjB1)

395 "The Force is Female"

So the Force is a man, without reason and accountability.

Posted by: Melvin Udall at May 25, 2018 05:41 PM (7A4qQ)

396 Wilder wasn't in it.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles

He was Brooks' long time friend and helped him write a lot of his material.

Posted by: Prince Ludwig the Deplorable at May 25, 2018 05:42 PM (f3MDZ)

397 368---I don't think there were many men in that 80 million sales figure for the book.
Posted by: rickb223 at May 25, 2018 05:33 PM (3oX+R)
-------------------------
Undoubtedly true, which is why it's fair enough to associate the book with a female audience.
That being said, it's only a pretty small minority of women who have shown interest in it.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at May 25, 2018 05:42 PM (0jtPF)

398 390.
Dalek Clinton 2020

OBFUSCATE! INTOXICATE!

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Slavic Customer Service Rep. at May 25, 2018 05:42 PM (fA1SL)

399 Even the "ettes.

That's just who we are.
Posted by: Jwest at May 25, 2018 04:05 PM (/roJx)
nope . I like my women like I like my men: Men.

Posted by: NaughtyPine at May 25, 2018 05:42 PM (/+bwe)

400 I don't even have to do a web search for that to know that Rules 34 and 36 are in effect.
Posted by: hogmartin at May 25, 2018 05:40 PM (y87Qq)
---
Is one of those rules "It's already a band name"?

But yeah, it's a....thing:

https://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/star-wars-lightsaber-dildo/

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at May 25, 2018 05:42 PM (qJtVm)

401 Test of Hillbot exoskeleton:

https://youtu.be/VTlV0Y5yAww?t=50

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at May 25, 2018 05:42 PM (oVJmc)

402 Imagine the quality of beefcake those four broads are working over on the casting couch.

Posted by: Han Soylo at May 25, 2018 05:43 PM (J7XgW)

403 I only watch these new SW movies with Rifftrax commentary now. The directors seem to be seized by Debunk Fever, where *everything* that we thought was great has to be degraded in front of our eyes. They got so carried away with it, in The Last Jedi the director started debunking stuff that had just been established one movie earlier! So characters we'd learned to like, like Finn and Poe, were belittled and humiliated by the know-it-all chicks.

When Admiral Purple-Hair took over and was ignoring our former hero, Poe, I noticed that she was studying a map with not 1, not 2, but *3* other Important Women! Not a male in sight; they were probably all scurrying around in the background, fetching coffee for the Mizzes.

I'm thoroughly tired of the phony Hen Power plot devices these movies now rely on.

Posted by: Dr. Mabuse at May 25, 2018 05:43 PM (fL4WD)

404 All True Conservatives should see this film!

Posted by: Bill Kristolmeth at May 25, 2018 05:43 PM (7PQBV)

405 105
Star Wars must die.

Posted by: Jak Sucio at May 25, 2018 04:24 PM (Y9uH4)

Also, the apes must die.

Posted by: Eric Braeden at May 25, 2018 05:44 PM (8iiMU)

406 NEWS FLASH-
Juan Williams is still dumber than a box of rocks.

Posted by: Farmer at May 25, 2018 05:44 PM (yJ1e6)

407 I don't even have to do a web search for that to know that Rules 34 and 36 are in effect.
Posted by: hogmartin at May 25, 2018 05:40 PM (y87Qq)
---
Is one of those rules "It's already a band name"?

But yeah, it's a....thing:

https://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/star-wars-lightsaber-dildo/
Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at May









The product description is priceless:

Experience the force in new ways with this lightsaber dildo. Available in a Luke green or Vader crimson, this silicone dildo is the ultimate way to introduce the Light Side to your Dark Side. Complement it with some light force choking, for added pleasure.



do you think it makes the light saber sound?

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:44 PM (MTjB1)

Posted by: Eric Braeden at May 25, 2018 05:44 PM (8iiMU)

409 Mr. Peebles: "Imagine what her health would be like after 18 months of a Presidential schedule."

Thank God Hillary will never be POTUS.

Posted by: Hillary's Liver at May 25, 2018 05:44 PM (H8S+R)

410 magine the quality of beefcake bulldyke those four broads are working over on the casting couch.
Posted by: Han Soylo

FIFY

Posted by: Prince Ludwig the Deplorable at May 25, 2018 05:45 PM (f3MDZ)

411 One must wonder how many people would use Facebook were it nationalised and made a federal agency? (Not that I'm advocating that... Maybe it already is for all intents and purposes! I don't know, but it would surprise me in the least...

Posted by: Zettai Roshia-no Supai at May 25, 2018 05:45 PM (e9G8E)

412
James Caan - We're in a Strange Place Men Can't Hit on Women Anymore

He's suggesting that the rules of the road when it comes to men and women have changed, and he thinks it defies natural instinct.



Caan is right. The left has always been about destroying the normal and traditional and replacing it with the freak show

Posted by: TheQuietMan at May 25, 2018 05:45 PM (SiINZ)

413 do you think it makes the light saber sound?
Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:44 PM (MTjB1)
---

Y5, I love that you dove in unafraid.

But yeah, it had better make that Wuuuwwwuuuuuuwuuubzzzzt sound.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at May 25, 2018 05:46 PM (qJtVm)

414 do you think it makes the light saber sound?
Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:44 PM (MTjB1)


Surely the user is expected to make the sound?

Because obviously they will be anyway. How could they not?

Posted by: hogmartin at May 25, 2018 05:46 PM (y87Qq)

415 2:55 here and my give-o-sh*t meter is at Zero.

Brew time I believe.

Posted by: Diogenes at May 25, 2018 05:46 PM (neVEe)

416 I think that's probably the reason why both men and women found Hans Solo an attractive character. In the original movie, he was strong, no nonsense and had a good verbal sparring with attraction in dealing with Leia. It reminded me of some of the interaction between men and woman in movies from the 30's and 40's.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 05:47 PM (vw6r3)

417 Nood. Tables.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at May 25, 2018 05:47 PM (7C3D2)

418 Dr. Mabuse: "I noticed that she was studying a map with not 1, not 2, but *3* other Important Women!"

They were trying to figure out which way was North. Or trying to find out from whom to ask directions.

I denounce my misogynistic self.

Posted by: AnonyBotymousDrivel at May 25, 2018 05:48 PM (H8S+R)

419 FIFY
Posted by: Prince Ludwig the Deplorable at May 25, 2018 05:45 PM (f3MDZ)

Why assume that that they'e all lesbians?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at May 25, 2018 05:48 PM (vw6r3)

420 Speaking of pointless movies, they're remaking "Papillon." Why? The original was a great movie.

Posted by: josephistan at May 25, 2018 05:49 PM (ANIFC)

421 Y5, I love that you dove in unafraid.

But yeah, it had better make that Wuuuwwwuuuuuuwuuubzzzzt sound.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at May




well, there is a lot of material there.

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:52 PM (MTjB1)

422 Surely the user is expected to make the sound?

Because obviously they will be anyway. How could they not?
Posted by: hogmartin at May




lol

Posted by: yankeefifth at May 25, 2018 05:52 PM (MTjB1)

423 Hate to say this but HA HA!!! I a Generation Xer. Star Wars is the cultural marker for my generation. I have seen everyone movie, not counting the cartoon, at the theatre. But I have zero interest in this one from the beginning. I could not help but ask WHY??? Then Disney announced it will be doing a Boba Fett movie for freakin' secondary character. What is next Young Jar Jar Binks??? I want originality like "Rogue One". Notice the best of the Disney releases was the one without any original characters except for cameos by Darth Vader and a CGI Grand Moff Tarkin. What everyone said when Disney bought the franchise has come true. Disney and Kathleen Kennedy appears to be running the franchise into the ground to squeeze every last cent.

Posted by: Michael J at May 25, 2018 06:02 PM (ZUWeV)

424 I understand Nazi Captain America crosses over from the MCU to kill Rey in the next movie.

Posted by: Richard McEnroe at May 25, 2018 06:04 PM (G/6B6)

425 do you think it makes the light saber sound?

The "Darth Vader Crimson" one breathes heavily.

Posted by: mikeski at May 25, 2018 06:16 PM (JGBbg)

426 >>>141 The best Han Solo standalone stories I've read were written by Brian Daley shortly after Star Wars came out.


Han Solo at Star's End was amazing. Read it as a kid, and many times since.

Posted by: Wyatt at May 25, 2018 06:23 PM (kFnmp)

427 The force is cellulite.

Posted by: Jim at May 25, 2018 07:35 PM (wnFFv)

428 I didn't see any comments about this, but the hillarious thing about that $120,000 China figure is that not only did they open the movie at the same time to avoid audience reviews to damage sales (TLJ lagged by several weeks and thus reviews were blamed for its poor showing), but it was titled simply "Ranger Solo" in hopes that Chinese audiences wouldn't know it was a Star Wars movie.

Which they apparently figured out

Posted by: Methos at May 25, 2018 08:25 PM (XQvuQ)

429 ALL star wars movies suck. Why should this be different?

Posted by: doug at May 25, 2018 08:44 PM (7DhQU)

430 So, "Soi", or "Soy", is the replacement for "Gay", right?

Posted by: Joe Bar at May 25, 2018 08:55 PM (wexIo)

431 My 16-year old son is giving this a hard pass, the first Star Wars film he has declined to see.

Posted by: Mutnodjmet at May 25, 2018 09:46 PM (hzdhb)

432 Eh, Star Wars ceased to exist for me with the Return of the Jedi

https://bit.ly/2J4MtFV

Posted by: Trigger Warning at May 26, 2018 02:29 AM (YRXy3)

433 For those of you unused to industries where the manufacturer has contempt verging on hatred for their own customers, gamers have had this situation since around 2011.

We'll be seeing more and more things made for the kind of customers a company wished it had and not for those it actually has

Posted by: dw at May 26, 2018 06:06 AM (stPAM)

434 Kathleen Kennedy actually dropped the "bombshell" news that she'd hired James Mangold to direct a stand-alone Soy Wars movie Boba Fett on the day that Soylo is premiered.
280
And who gives a shit about a Boba Fett movie.
Die Disney, Die.
Posted by: Monk at May 25, 2018 05:10 PM (9acFt)


Even an ex-fanboy like me realized at 12 years old that Boba Fett was one of the lamest characters, and lamest villain, in the original Star Wars pantheon.

Accidentally knocked into the saarlaac pit by the blind guy ten minutes into the movie after little more than standing around for two features? Fcukin' samurai-level epic, George....

Posted by: BuddyPC at May 26, 2018 11:18 AM (KP19E)

435 as long as the force is between their legs I'm all for it.

Posted by: bob at May 26, 2018 07:55 PM (XtFhA)

436 Lando Calrissian is hardly a random character, IMO. I know finding another Billy Dee would be an exercise, but not impossible. Unlike the EU, there are thousands of hunky, masculine black actors here standing around twiddling their thumbs or sometimes even working. Just off the top of my head, Shemar Moore, for example. The commies ruin everything.

Posted by: Anna Mac at May 26, 2018 08:50 PM (rj4Yf)

437 About 1 out of 6 movies are worth watching. The problem is, most don't figure that out before they have bought 12 or 13 tickets.

Posted by: WarEagle82 at May 26, 2018 09:32 PM (xUc0d)

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