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Rand Paul Told To Expect Federal Charges Against His Leftist Attacker

Yesterday, Rand Paul tweeted out two stories suggesting that his attacker's lawyer's claim that this was just a dispute about grass clippings -- which, by the way, the media really pushed hard as if it served as a rebuttal to the idea that one of their own had once again gone Progressive Postal -- was total bullshit:





He also tweeted out that his injuries were more serious than previously thought, aka "More serious than a class 4 misdemeanor."



Why push the claim about grass-clippings? Because it's a federal offense to threaten or assault a federal officer (which a Senator is). So the Postal Prog's lawyer is trying to push the claim that this had nothing to do with Paul's status as a federal officer. Just about grass clippings, you know.

And now, Rand Paul has been told to expect federal charges to be laid against the Postal Prog:



Posted by: Ace at 05:20 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of page)

1 McRib!

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:19 PM (mbhDw)

2 Well that's a relief.

Because it seems like the left is ratcheting up the violence.

Posted by: Kreplach at November 09, 2017 05:19 PM (2JcMg)

3 You lucky bastard.

Posted by: sniffybigtoe at November 09, 2017 05:19 PM (1ISKN)

4
I'll get the others.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:19 PM (mbhDw)

5 Also, Postal Prog is a member of the Resistance.

The Morning Joe "salon" just laughed this off the other day. Said Rand probably threw a twig on the guy's yard.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (PY9jH)

6

He needs to go to jail or this sh*t won't stop.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (fceHP)

7 I saw Pleural Effusion open for the Cramps at the Dollhouse in 85.

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy - Nostrildamus at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (p+B3w)

8 Good. This dicklick is going to have to plea just to keep the sentence under 5 years.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (QQ+il)

9
I thought I saw some a-hole media liar say Rand deserved it.

Prick.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (mbhDw)

10 "....six broken ribs & new X-ray shows a pleural effusion"


That has to painful AF!

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (Enq6K)

11 I dated a 30yo when I was 18.

Posted by: lin-duh at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (kufk0)

12 Pants-shitting paranoia, to even entertain the idea if politically-motivated violence by the left against the right. And full on Alex Jones madness to claim that there's widespread support - most tacit, some explicit - for same.
There is no cultural revolution in progress. There is not a cold civil war.

Posted by: Apple Fritters While Rome Burns at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (fA1SL)

13 Political violence against our enemies is a good thing, and here's why...

Posted by: Vox at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (oVJmc)

14 I'd like to read what Tapper & co would be tweeting if it was Schumer's neighbor.

How long til this story disappears down the Menendez trail?

Posted by: Shopgirl: Wearing her 2015 WS t-shirt at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (DLjGR)

15 I still don't understand why Rand was mowing his own lawn. Don't they have a guy for that??? Like, someone who's kids we are already supporting, cradle to grave?

Posted by: Peaches at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (14URa)

16 At least there was no masturbation involved. Except, perhaps, on Shep's part.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:22 PM (PY9jH)

17 Fucking Nazis

Posted by: Walter at November 09, 2017 05:22 PM (lELxn)

18 Based on what you posted the other day, Ace, no motive is required. The act itself invokes the law.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at November 09, 2017 05:22 PM (QQ+il)

19 So much for the claim that there would never be federal charges brought.

Posted by: JackStraw at November 09, 2017 05:22 PM (/tuJf)

20 Good. Give it to him good and hard.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at November 09, 2017 05:22 PM (tbOMB)

21 Let one of us attack a sitting Senator and see how fast you are in federal custody with the guards crapping on your breakfast and pissing in your tea.

Posted by: tentotwo at November 09, 2017 05:22 PM (yhf6w)

22

I saw someone mention the guys social media was political.

I have yet to see what they meant. I haven't seen a fb page or twitter account.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 09, 2017 05:22 PM (fceHP)

23 i wonder what some Obola appointee will plead this down to?

Posted by: redc1c4 at November 09, 2017 05:22 PM (P8FeH)

24 So, the doc will lose his license, right?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:23 PM (PY9jH)

25 Six broken ribs and a pleural effusion? I wonder if he has to drink Smoothies?

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy - Nostrildamus at November 09, 2017 05:23 PM (p+B3w)

26 Rand Paul's lawn is white privilege and why his neighbor was right to attack him for it.

Posted by: Salon at November 09, 2017 05:23 PM (eIQHF)

27 So,attacking someone for grass clippings is allowed?

Posted by: steevy at November 09, 2017 05:23 PM (LiyEm)

28 I report. You decide.

Posted by: Shep!, now with more Shep at November 09, 2017 05:23 PM (ctuyM)

29 So much for the claim that there would never be federal charges brought.

I invoke the Comey Standard!

Posted by: The Douchebag's Lawyer at November 09, 2017 05:23 PM (oVJmc)

30 14 I'd like to read what Tapper & co would be tweeting if it was Schumer's neighbor.

How long til this story disappears down the Menendez trail?
Posted by: Shopgirl: Wearing her 2015 WS t-shirt at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (DLjGR)


Many years ago on a very early Saturday or Sunday morning, I was on a deserted street in Brooklyn Heights when, lo and behold, Cuck Schemer approached and walked past me.

Oddly enough, I was in a gym locker room with no one around except Al Sharptone.

You do not know the meaning of temptation until...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:24 PM (mbhDw)

31 He likes to mow his lawn he says it is therapeutic.

Posted by: Talulah Jane at November 09, 2017 05:24 PM (jhRW+)

32 I know I'm repeating folks from before, but I am pleasantly surprised that Rand Paul cuts his own lawn.


His neighbor needs to spend some years in a Federal PMITA prison.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at November 09, 2017 05:24 PM (xJa6I)

33 >>>with the guards crapping on your breakfast and pissing in your tea.

Pro tip: stay away from the chipped beef.

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy - Nostrildamus at November 09, 2017 05:24 PM (p+B3w)

34 Maybe Rand wanted to date the neighbor's 14 yo daughter.

I keed.

Posted by: RI Red - under barrel covfefe thrower at November 09, 2017 05:24 PM (0HbCx)

35 Because it seems like the left is ratcheting up the violence.

Posted by: Kreplach at November 09, 2017 05:19 PM (2JcMg)


And Rand Paul was on the softball field when Steve Scalise was shot, AND riding a tractor on his own lawn when he was attacked.

In his case, it's not only getting *close* to home... it's actually home.

I want that asshole who assaulted him in jail for a decade.

Grass clippings, my ass.

Posted by: Ace Tractor Seat Supply at November 09, 2017 05:24 PM (ajiE5)

36 28 I report. You decide.
Posted by: Shep!, now with more Shep at November 09, 2017 05:23 PM (ctuyM)

I report. And decide for you...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:24 PM (mbhDw)

37 Sen. Pauls' vicious attacker once convicted should be given the Captain Kidd punishment as a warning to others who are murderously thinking of turning their evil fantasies into reality.

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (XMCWD)

38 We had a neighbor that lived behind us who had pavement and he got pissed every time my dad cut the grass because of the clippings.My dad didn't give a shit and the old geezer never tackled him.

Posted by: steevy at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (LiyEm)

39 This is my shocked face.

Posted by: Caliban at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (QE8X6)

40 Now the anesthesiologist gets to concoct a story about how mentally ill he is and has been for many, many years. While practicing anesthesiology.

Posted by: Lester at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (LfJIn)

41 We need to make Progressive Postal a thing.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (4ErVI)

42 Also I kinda like McRibs...

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (xJa6I)

43 I'd say that soft treatment of assault against elected officials is not a standard they want to set right now.

I guess this neighbor is surprised that his Antifa buddies didn't mean all that tough talk after all.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (oVJmc)

44 31 He likes to mow his lawn he says it is therapeutic.
Posted by: Talulah Jane at November 09, 2017 05:24 PM (jhRW+)


Mowing the lawn. Is that what they call it, Huma?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (mbhDw)

45 I wish there would be some more attention paid to a wave of increasing incidents of violence by lunatic lefties.

Its been a lot of incidents just the past year, and it seems to be accelerating.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (39g3+)

46 He was oppressing the dandelions!

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (ATVNj)

47 You know what else is relaxing?

Posted by: Aqua Buddha at November 09, 2017 05:26 PM (lELxn)

48 I've heard a lot of anesthesiologists have drug problems. Just sayin'.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:26 PM (PY9jH)

49 So my neighbor did not put his recycle bin out after sunset for morning pick up. I shot him, castle law and all that sh!t.

Posted by: rhennigantx at November 09, 2017 05:26 PM (bmkS9)

50 Mowing the lawn can be enjoyable in a zen way.

Not when it's farking hot out though.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 05:26 PM (4ErVI)

51 I'm shocked!!

Posted by: SOMEASSHOLESTOLEMYPEN at November 09, 2017 05:26 PM (nQHw/)

52 Jeff Sessions stopped by Rand Paul's house today.

He fell asleep on the lawn.

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at November 09, 2017 05:26 PM (ATVNj)

53 45 I wish there would be some more attention paid to a wave of increasing incidents of violence by lunatic lefties.

Its been a lot of incidents just the past year, and it seems to be accelerating.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (39g3+)

Agreed. This will come to a head. The Commie protests/riots were an early sign. Now the assaults are getting more personal and lethal.

Carry on and carry extra mags.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at November 09, 2017 05:27 PM (xJa6I)

54 If one of those ribs had punctured a lung, it could have been an assassination.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 09, 2017 05:27 PM (oVJmc)

55
Notice how not one other Republican colleague seems to give a shit?

Democrats would be howling mad right now.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 05:27 PM (yXCUX)

56 I wonder how many lawyers are culling through the patients list to see how many were injured or killed by this guy.

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at November 09, 2017 05:27 PM (XMCWD)

57 10 "....six broken ribs & new X-ray shows a pleural effusion"


That has to painful AF!
Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 05:21 PM (Enq6K)


I have a healed broken rib...for years now. But I swear it still hurts at times. Like right now. I don't know if it is phantom pain or what, but it never felt quite right again.

I really feel for Rand. He's gotta be in a world of hurt. This stuff is really, really painful.

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:27 PM (hLB6Q)

58 I have chosen to live as a gay man.

Posted by: Rene Albert Boucher at November 09, 2017 05:27 PM (QQ+il)

59 I mean we've had two church shootings, a country music concert shooting, and two Republican congressmen attacked this year alone. Then there were the cop shootings last year, all the beatings and attacks by antiFirstAmendment people...

The common theme here is pretty clear: all are hard left radicals. Maybe all this rhetoric is kind of dangerous to keep stirring people up?

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:28 PM (39g3+)

60 this is your anesthesiologist on #NeverTrump

Posted by: x at November 09, 2017 05:28 PM (nFwvY)

61 55 Notice how not one other Republican colleague seems to give a shit?

Democrats would be howling mad right now.
Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 05:27 PM (yXCUX)


They're too busy taking down Roy Moore and giving us a phony tax bill McCain will vote no on anyway.

Priorities, yo.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:28 PM (mbhDw)

62 He likes to mow his lawn he says it is therapeutic.
Posted by: Talulah Jane at November 09, 2017 05:24 PM (jhRW+)


it is

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 09, 2017 05:28 PM (fceHP)

63 Has John McCain expressed any concern? Or is everything all about him?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:28 PM (PY9jH)

64 JJ - you've done it now

Posted by: Talulah Jane at November 09, 2017 05:28 PM (jhRW+)

65 Sorry Rene, you ain't fabulous enough.

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at November 09, 2017 05:28 PM (XMCWD)

66 try him; convict him; lock him in a cage for ten years


pour discourager les autres...



Posted by: Harry Dexter White at November 09, 2017 05:28 PM (Co9e8)

67
Speaking of ribs...

someone mentioned in the Food Thread they're doing RIBS for Thanksgiving.

At Costco yesterday I saw they sell cooked Short Ribs that look really good. I think this might be for me this year.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 05:28 PM (yXCUX)

68 Combine these attacks with all the "accidental" releases of conservative and right-leaning politician and pundit personal information. It just feels awfully deliberate to me.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:29 PM (39g3+)

69 Broken / Fractured Ribs suck.

Take a long time to heal up, too.

Posted by: garrett at November 09, 2017 05:29 PM (lELxn)

70 my 1100 lb. horse kicked a guy with both back feet in his ribs. guy ended up in the hospital with broken ribs and perfectly outlined horseshoe bruises. it was a windy day and whiskey was friskey.

this neighbor is seriously deranged to have caused such harm.

Posted by: concrete girl at November 09, 2017 05:29 PM (MF4DY)

71 Wait'll the dude finds out there are rules against masturbating in prison.

Posted by: OJ at November 09, 2017 05:29 PM (HgMAr)

72 I fell out of a tree once while operating a chain saw.

I didn't break any ribs, but I wasn't right for about 6 months. Bruised ribs and muscles take forever to heal.

Sneezing or coughing was like hell.

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at November 09, 2017 05:29 PM (ATVNj)

73 I have chosen to live as an attack helicopter.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at November 09, 2017 05:29 PM (xJa6I)

74 I have a healed broken rib...for years now. But I swear it still hurts at times. Like right now. I don't know if it is phantom pain or what, but it never felt quite right again.

I really feel for Rand. He's gotta be in a world of hurt. This stuff is really, really painful.

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:27 PM (hLB6Q)

Maybe it didn't set quite right.

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 05:29 PM (Enq6K)

75 Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (39g3+)

I feel like November 8 last year was some kind of point where there was a universe split, but instead of it splitting perfectly it split imperfectly. Two realities are running concurrently. The leftists' brains think honestly that they're in the universe where Hillary won but like a severely delusional person become violent when their perception is challenged.

We live in the true reality. Anyway, that's how I like to think about it. The real truth is that liberalism is a mental disorder.

Posted by: The Deplorable Mr. Trumpkin at November 09, 2017 05:29 PM (wwd4n)

76 If that guy that assaulted him listens to his lawyer, he will go on an all Smoothie diet and show up in court in a suit 2 sizes too big and try to look as weak and decrepit as possible.

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy - Nostrildamus at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (p+B3w)

77 I've heard a lot of anesthesiologists have drug problems. Just sayin'.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:26 PM (PY9jH)


This is true. Sampling the wares too often, so to speak. They are pretty much the lowest rung in the pecking order too.

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (hLB6Q)

78
I enjoy cutting my own lawn. I had a service for years. They were complete screw ups. Fast, but nasty. Now I put my ear protection on, like Rand Paul, and zone out.

Couple hours later I'm done. Exactly the way it should be done. Rollered, striped, man-a-cured.

Posted by: Ace Tractor Seat Supply at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (ajiE5)

79 He likes to mow his lawn he says it is therapeutic.

It is.

Posted by: Harvey Weinstein at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (oVJmc)

80 Jesse Watters is feeling really sorry for the women involved in the Roy Moore story. He thinks Moore should step down.

All righty then. Let's just give another one up to the Dems.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (PY9jH)

81 67
Speaking of ribs...

someone mentioned in the Food Thread they're doing RIBS for Thanksgiving.

At Costco yesterday I saw they sell cooked Short Ribs that look really good. I think this might be for me this year.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 05:28 PM (yXCUX)

I'm probably getting a Costco chicken. The last couple of years the turkey has been a disappointment.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (4ErVI)

82 I cracked my sternum while knee boarding. It hurt to breathe.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (QQ+il)

83 80 Jesse Watters is feeling really sorry for the women involved in the Roy Moore story. He thinks Moore should step down.

All righty then. Let's just give another one up to the Dems.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (PY9jH)

Hell with that.

War.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at November 09, 2017 05:31 PM (xJa6I)

84 Uh, your honor, what is a senator?

Posted by: Future Juror at Rene Boucher Trial at November 09, 2017 05:31 PM (j+dfT)

85 77 I've heard a lot of anesthesiologists have drug problems. Just sayin'.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:26 PM (PY9jH)


This is true. Sampling the wares too often, so to speak. They are pretty much the lowest rung in the pecking order too.

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (hLB6Q)


I had one for my colonoscopy about 10 years ago who was defrocked for reusing needles. Had to take all sorts of tests and sweated bullets until they all came back negative.

Wanted to kill that fucker.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:31 PM (mbhDw)

86 Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:27 PM (hLB6Q)


I once slipped and fell down the stairs when moving back up to college from my parents' place one year. Slipped and jammed my pinkie toe into the banister as my 240 lb ass went flying down the stairs. Foot turned black and I swear it was broken though I never went and saw a doctor because I was lazy. It recovered fully but hurt on and off for 2-3 years after that.

Posted by: The Deplorable Mr. Trumpkin at November 09, 2017 05:31 PM (wwd4n)

87 Grass clippings, my ass.

Posted by: Ace Tractor Seat Supply at November 09, 2017 05:24 PM (ajiE5)



Everyone has mulching mowers these days. No clippings. They could probably disprove this by that alone.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 09, 2017 05:31 PM (fceHP)

88 This just cries out for an FBI INVESTIGATION!

Oh, you don't want it swept under the rug? Well never mind then.

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at November 09, 2017 05:31 PM (398bZ)

89 >>my 1100 lb. horse kicked a guy


That's why you never trust those things.

Posted by: garrett at November 09, 2017 05:32 PM (lELxn)

90 War!

What is it good for!

Making your enemies beg for mercy.

Posted by: Anna Puma (HQCaR) at November 09, 2017 05:32 PM (XMCWD)

91 84 Uh, your honor, what is a senator?
Posted by: Future Juror at Rene Boucher Trial at November 09, 2017 05:31 PM (j+dfT)


Thread winner. LOL but crying on the inside for my country.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:32 PM (mbhDw)

92 >>All righty then. Let's just give another one up to the Dems.

Hey, we've got a 2 seat majority if you include Collins, McCain and the coke head so what's the problem?

Posted by: JackStraw at November 09, 2017 05:32 PM (/tuJf)

93 Thank goodness we got that "this was just about lawn clippings" meme out there before the real news hit - which we can now embargo. Pshew . . it is hard cranking out the narrative instead of the truth all the time .

24-7 job my friend.

Well - gotta go - gotta find some random Alabama Democrat women to claim they were molested by Judge Moore when they were in utero. Then there's that brunch date in hell with Goebbels. Busy, busy, busy!

See ya!

Posted by: Your MSM Betters at November 09, 2017 05:32 PM (Fb9aZ)

94 I confused...charges? against a progressive? when the victim is a neo-hitler worse than trump conservative (i.e., a normal)?

no, you must have misread this story. Maybe Paul's going to be charged with collusion to violate the emoulluments clause?

Posted by: Witwickian Sage (muh IP=BooBs) at November 09, 2017 05:33 PM (RDd1I)

95 the law doesn't work that way, ace.

Posted by: Witwickian Sage (muh IP=BooBs) at November 09, 2017 05:33 PM (RDd1I)

96 Sneezing or coughing was like hell.



I wince whenever I think about that part. It really was one of the worst parts. Every time I felt a sneeze coming on I felt like I was trying to stop a runaway train coming right at me. Just the worst.

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:33 PM (hLB6Q)

97 81The last couple of years the turkey has been a disappointment.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (4ErVI)



Alton Brown brined turkey recipe. Never fails to be delicious and juicy.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at November 09, 2017 05:33 PM (tbOMB)

98 I told you the sexual assault mob would spill over and try to bring down people on the Right.

Posted by: Roc Ingersol at November 09, 2017 05:33 PM (Z4z/q)

99 The sweet thing about Federal Charges is that there is No Parole. Never, None, Nada. You get 10 years, you do 10 years. (which happens to be what I think the sentence will be in this case, which means the perp will be a useless old invalid when, and if, he makes it out)

Posted by: Tom Servo at November 09, 2017 05:33 PM (k1TUh)

100 Rand Paul aggravates neighbor, alleges injuries from incident

Posted by: The NYT at November 09, 2017 05:34 PM (QC/4S)

101 At age 14, I too was molested by Dinty Moore.

Posted by: Kathy Griffen at November 09, 2017 05:34 PM (mFx4k)

102 excess fluid in the fluid space around the lungs ... pleural effusion.

*yeah I looked it up, had no clue

six broken ribs ... man ... sounds like he really could have killed Rand, sheesh

Posted by: illiniwek at November 09, 2017 05:34 PM (/aIFg)

103 He likes to mow his lawn he says it is therapeutic.

I think so. Its very peaceful to me and it feels nice to turn that ragged lawn into a nice even one.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:34 PM (39g3+)

104 Conservative Republican Rene Albert Boucher

Posted by: AoSHQ Stylebook at November 09, 2017 05:34 PM (QQ+il)

105 If I didn't have to worry about anything, ever, I would just cut grass all day. Very relaxing.

Posted by: Country Boy - 2017 GNAMM and CenTexMoMee survivor at November 09, 2017 05:34 PM (v7d6i)

106 "Jesse Watters is feeling really sorry for the women involved in the Roy Moore story. He thinks Moore should step down."

If the GOPe hung around with their constituents instead of Democrats, they wouldn't assume he's guilty.

Posted by: Rob Crawford at November 09, 2017 05:34 PM (9zKsP)

107 Rand Paul's right wing extremist views lead to domestic incident

Posted by: The NYT at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (QC/4S)

108 When I was dating D'oh, the phone was ringing and I was in the middle of reading a recipe that I was preparing for our dinner. I hustled toward the phone and rammed the cookbook in my right rib cage, breaking a rib. Hurt like hell for a long time. I felt like an idiot, but I did manage to make dinner. Went to the doctor the next day.

You might say I "powered through."

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (PY9jH)

109 I have a healed broken rib...for years now. But I swear it still hurts at times. Like right now. I don't know if it is phantom pain or what, but it never felt quite right again.

I really feel for Rand. He's gotta be in a world of hurt. This stuff is really, really painful.

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:27 PM (hLB6Q)


I feel sorry for him too.

He will never be the same.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (fceHP)

110 Bannon was a huge Moore booster. Assuming Moore is being smeared, as I do, he should hold a rally and announce a multi million dollar libel suit against Bezos.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (mbhDw)

111 did paul ever date a teenager? huhhh? WaPo is going to be going through every GOP'ers prom photos to make sure there's no consensual legal shit going on.

Posted by: Witwickian Sage (muh IP=BooBs) at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (RDd1I)

112 Dinty Moore was my favorite Bond.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (4ErVI)

113 >>The last couple of years the turkey has been a disappointment.


Yeah. I'm with you on that.

Every time I whip it out and get a good stroke going the Turkey walks out of the room.

The chicken just sits there. Like a filthy little bitch. So fowl.

Posted by: Louis CK at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (lELxn)

114 89 >>my 1100 lb. horse kicked a guy


That's why you never trust those things.


True story: I have a grand uncle who was killed when a horse kicked him in the head. Grandma used to tell the story when we were little.

My sister is still terrified of horses.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (xJa6I)

115 With a name like Rene Albert Boucher, I'm surprised he's not a mass murder.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (QQ+il)

116 107 Rand Paul's right wing extremist views lead to domestic incident
Posted by: The NYT at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (QC/4S)


Jews Responsible for Air Pollution Over Southern Poland...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (mbhDw)

117 Anesthesiologists are now becoming pain management doctors or as I call them, legal drug dealers.

Posted by: Roc Ingersol at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (Z4z/q)

118 He's got a purdy mouf.

Posted by: Federal Inmate 678 at November 09, 2017 05:36 PM (mcI77)

119 >>If I didn't have to worry about anything, ever, I would just cut grass all day.

Forrest?

Posted by: JackStraw at November 09, 2017 05:36 PM (/tuJf)

120 Rand Paul's nazi positions lead neighbor to respond

Posted by: The NYT at November 09, 2017 05:36 PM (QC/4S)

121 I read what the people at the hospital had said about the guy days ago. So when the lawn clippings thing came out I just dismissed it. Couldn't figure out why the media gave it such importance.

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:36 PM (hLB6Q)

122 112 Dinty Moore was my favorite Bond.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (4ErVI)

Terry Moore was one hot MILF.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:36 PM (mbhDw)

123 also, did anyone ever give a teenager a beer? that's like child endangerment, duddes. collusion too?

Posted by: Witwickian Sage (muh IP=BooBs) at November 09, 2017 05:36 PM (RDd1I)

124 117 Anesthesiologists are now becoming pain management doctors or as I call them, legal drug dealers.
Posted by: Roc Ingersol at November 09, 2017 05:35 PM (Z4z/q)


Something about a national opiod crisis? Wha...?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:37 PM (mbhDw)

125 What did this guy do to cause 6 broken ribs? Did he body slammed him on the concrete driveway?

Posted by: dantesed at November 09, 2017 05:37 PM (88xKn)

126 97 81The last couple of years the turkey has been a disappointment.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (4ErVI)



Alton Brown brined turkey recipe. Never fails to be delicious and juicy.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at November 09, 2017 05:33 PM (tbOMB)


I brined my turkey for several years until I decided...meh... it makes the meat wet. And no gravy drippings.

After making turkeys for 38 years, roasted, brined, fried, spatchcocked, I cooked one in one of those turkey bags last year. OMG...one of the best I've ever made. Doing it again this year.

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 05:37 PM (Enq6K)

127 Here's the way to shut down even the bullshit landscaping excuse:

So what? So you jump a guy and bust up his ribs over a landscaping dispute?

----------

That's a really good way to get shot in my yard.

Posted by: Bea Arthur's Dick at November 09, 2017 05:37 PM (jWe5r)

128 I thought this was a Shep-free zone.

Posted by: Charles the Simple at November 09, 2017 05:37 PM (w7U7L)

129 Uh, your honor, what is a senator?
Posted by: Future Juror at Rene Boucher Trial at November 09, 2017 05:31 PM (j+dfT)

Winner!!

Posted by: golfman at November 09, 2017 05:37 PM (48QDY)

130
Everyone has mulching mowers these days. No clippings. They could probably disprove this by that alone.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 09, 2017 05:31 PM (fceHP)


I just got a new tractor. 18 freaking horsepower. It came without mulching blades, probably next year I'll change over. But when I run up the gutters in my street, blowing the leaves out of my gutters, I fill my neighbors up. Twenty feet away.

They're on the left politically so I try to care, but don't.

I'm a bad person in need of six broken ribs, I guess.

Posted by: Ace Tractor Seat Supply at November 09, 2017 05:37 PM (ajiE5)

131 I know a guy who got kicked in the head by his horse.

He's got a dent in his head that you could put a cup of coffee on/in.

I call him Dent Head.

Really, though. It's like a recessed shelf. In his forehead.

Posted by: garrett at November 09, 2017 05:37 PM (lELxn)

132 Rand Paul Fails to Moderate Extremist Views, Gets Into Confrontation with Neighbor

Posted by: The NYT at November 09, 2017 05:37 PM (QC/4S)

133 I brined my turkey for several years until I decided...meh... it makes the meat wet. And no gravy drippings.

After making turkeys for 38 years, roasted, brined, fried, spatchcocked, I cooked one in one of those turkey bags last year. OMG...one of the best I've ever made. Doing it again this year.
Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 05:37 PM (Enq6K)


You like the turkey dry?

Posted by: The Deplorable Mr. Trumpkin at November 09, 2017 05:38 PM (wwd4n)

134 he was one of the best horses i've ever owned.
...but yes, gotta always 'watch your top knot' around them.

Posted by: concrete girl at November 09, 2017 05:38 PM (MF4DY)

135 I'm sick right now with something like bronchitis and sinus infection. When I have to cough, I have to stop and brace myself because it makes my head feel like exploding. Luckily I only have to cough about once or twice an hour. My neck is all kinds of messed up too from falling asleep sitting up...

Posted by: lin-duh at November 09, 2017 05:38 PM (kufk0)

136 I think so. Its very peaceful to me and it feels nice to turn that ragged lawn into a nice even one.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:34 PM (39g3+)


also, aromatherapy

smells great

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 09, 2017 05:38 PM (fceHP)

137 +1 on the turkey bag.

We're just paying Gobble in Woodinville to make our dinner for us. It's just two people this year, so no point in getting fancy.

I will have to put pants on to pick it up. Which is a downside.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at November 09, 2017 05:38 PM (xJa6I)

138 lawn clippings, that's just so ridiculous. Who blindsides a guy so bad he shatters six ribs over grass clippings? Either he's a raging lunatic or the story was just stupid.

But I guess having two hard left antifa-supporting Trump haters violently attacking people on the same day had to be smoothed over somehow.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:38 PM (39g3+)

139 Wait, JJ got a McRib? Somethin' not right there...

Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at November 09, 2017 05:38 PM (AM1GF)

140 >>True story: I have a grand uncle who was killed when a horse kicked him in the head. Grandma used to tell the story when we were little.

I've been kicked, bit, head butted and thrown by horses. One clipped my sisters head with a shod hoof and knocked her cold and my mother got a compound fracture of one of her thighs from a horse trying to kick fly away.

And I spent a good amount of my yute rebuilding stalls that horses had demolished by kicking them.

I'm all set with horses.

Posted by: JackStraw at November 09, 2017 05:38 PM (/tuJf)

141 Alton Brown brined turkey recipe. Never fails to be delicious and juicy.
Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at November 09, 2017 05:33 PM (tbOMB)

Definitely not Golfman's wife.

Too much salt.

One night...

Posted by: golfman at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (48QDY)

142 131 I know a guy who got kicked in the head by his horse.

He's got a dent in his head that you could put a cup of coffee on/in.

I call him Dent Head.

Really, though. It's like a recessed shelf. In his forehead.
Posted by: garrett at November 09, 2017 05:37 PM (lELxn)


Nicho in pueblo architecture. Very convenient. Doesn't have to ask anyone to hold his beer.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (mbhDw)

143 46 He was oppressing the dandelions!
Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at November 09, 2017 05:25 PM (ATVNj)


He probably shovels his walk in the winter, too, and oppresses all the snowflakes.

Posted by: LCMS Rulz! at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (3NjrP)

144 also, aromatherapy

Yes it smells wonderful. Cut lawn should be a scent for men. And its almost always a really nice day when you mow the lawn. I never minded doing it.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (39g3+)

145 Six broken ribs? Unless Paul has osteogenesis imperfecta, that took some work on the part of the attacker.

Posted by: Insomniac at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (NWiLs)

146 It sounds like they have some not for publication info on this guy.

Posted by: Under Fire at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (mcI77)

147 someone mentioned in the Food Thread they're doing RIBS for Thanksgiving.

At Costco yesterday I saw they sell cooked Short Ribs that look really good. I think this might be for me this year.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 05:28 PM (yXCUX)

I'm probably getting a Costco chicken. The last couple of years the turkey has been a disappointment.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis


WinStar World Casino Buffet. Ribeyes, prime rib, turkey, etc.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (vVRlw)

148 I think Trey Gowdy is behind the attack on Rand.

It's a hair thing......fetish maybe.

There can be only one.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (nUkMr)

149 "also, aromatherapy

smells great"

Right up until the point that the blade runs into the big pile of dog doo that the guy down the street lets his rottweiler sneak into my yard when he walks it.

Posted by: Tom Servo at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (k1TUh)

150 I read what the people at the hospital had said about the guy days ago. So when the lawn clippings thing came out I just dismissed it. Couldn't figure out why the media gave it such importance.
Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:36 PM (hLB6Q)

Yet, Roy Moore undressed...

Posted by: golfman at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (48QDY)

151 When we lived up north, we had a yuge corner lot, and I loved mowing that yard. It was relaxing. I also liked edging it and blowing off the driveway and sidewalks.

My husband also enjoyed mowing and messing in the yard, but our yard is too large, everything grows back overnight down here, and he just couldn't run a business and keep it up. We're on our second landscape management company, and I'm not pleased.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:40 PM (PY9jH)

152 What did this guy do to cause 6 broken ribs?

Kicked or stomped him after blindsiding Rand to the ground.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at November 09, 2017 05:40 PM (QQ+il)

153 These thugs cannot be allowed to get away with this. Boucher needs to be tried and put away for a very, very long time (20 years max, if I recall the statute correctly that was linked a few days ago). As this pattern is becoming more common, ie. trying to intimidate lawmakers, I would be OK with putting this asshole up before a firing squad. These cowardly shits need a deterrent they can understand. Or they need to be culled. They are secular jihadis raised up in our public madrassas.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at November 09, 2017 05:40 PM (/qEW2)

154 I am not a big fan of Rand Paul but I do feel for him and his crazy ass neighbor should be locked up. And I am not buying the Moore allegations - all rubbish they are throwing out when PDT is out of the country. I hope he kicks McTurtles ass so hard he needs to poop in a bag for the next six month.

Posted by: IC at November 09, 2017 05:40 PM (a0IVu)

155 144 also, aromatherapy

Yes it smells wonderful. Cut lawn should be a scent for men. And its almost always a really nice day when you mow the lawn. I never minded doing it.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (39g3+)

The smell of cut grass makes me nauseous. Especially if it's wet.

Posted by: Insomniac at November 09, 2017 05:40 PM (NWiLs)

156 Shep reports: Multiple sources tell Fox that the Senator Rand Paul has been told to expect federal charges to be filed against his attacker.

When I first heard him say this, I thought Paul was being charged. Never heard of the victim being told. Think Shep wanted to go off the cliff and turned back at the last minute

Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 05:40 PM (4u7kU)

157 Several important Republicans, who asked not to be named when I manufactured quotes to attribute to them, said today,

"This sounds like wild over-charging to me. But what can you expect from a weaponized Department of Justice?"

Posted by: Jake Trapper at November 09, 2017 05:40 PM (ylUqT)

158 140 >>True story: I have a grand uncle who was killed when a horse kicked him in the head. Grandma used to tell the story when we were little.

I've been kicked, bit, head butted and thrown by horses. One clipped my sisters head with a shod hoof and knocked her cold and my mother got a compound fracture of one of her thighs from a horse trying to kick fly away.

And I spent a good amount of my yute rebuilding stalls that horses had demolished by kicking them.

I'm all set with horses.
Posted by: JackStraw at November 09, 2017 05:38 PM (/tuJf)

Jeez, maybe my sister is on to something...

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at November 09, 2017 05:40 PM (xJa6I)

159 This is why they clamor for gun control - because none of them have the self control to not lose their shit and spaz out whenever they get sideways, and they just assume everyone else would act the same way.

Posted by: Burnett at November 09, 2017 05:40 PM (j88mS)

160 Rachel Madcow and Tingles Matthews are going to be butt hurt if the Feds file charges against this Bernie Bro.

Posted by: Comanche Voter at November 09, 2017 05:40 PM (Sda6L)

161 >>Nicho in pueblo architecture. Very convenient. Doesn't have to ask anyone to hold his beer.


I buy him little knick knacks for it all the time.

Like those tiny turtles with the spring loaded head.

Posted by: garrett at November 09, 2017 05:41 PM (lELxn)

162 70 my 1100 lb. horse kicked a guy with both back feet in his ribs. guy ended up in the hospital with broken ribs and perfectly outlined horseshoe bruises. it was a windy day and whiskey was friskey.

this neighbor is seriously deranged to have caused such harm.
Posted by: concrete girl at November 09, 2017 05:29 PM (MF4DY)

I would have thought that a horse kick like that would kill him. Ouch

Posted by: F.N.G. at November 09, 2017 05:41 PM (kiSdp)

163
I still sneak a peak at football games. Three hundred pound guys hitting three hundred pound guys with all the force they can muster.

But I'll be damned if I can recall any football player who ever left the game and later had half a dozen broken ribs.

I still think a baseball bat was involved.

Posted by: Ace Tractor Seat Supply at November 09, 2017 05:41 PM (ajiE5)

164 He probably shovels his walk in the winter, too, and oppresses all the snowflakes.
Posted by: LCMS Rulz! at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (3NjrP)

Nice.

Posted by: golfman at November 09, 2017 05:41 PM (48QDY)

165 145 Six broken ribs? Unless Paul has osteogenesis imperfecta, that took some work on the part of the attacker.
Posted by: Insomniac at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (NWiLs)


My thoughts exactly. He must have had some heavy duty weapon. Not like Rand Paul would have just stood still & not fought back. That is serious damage. And a doctor would know that...which is what I find scary.

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:41 PM (hLB6Q)

166 I think Trey Gowdy is behind the attack on Rand.



It's a hair thing......fetish maybe.



There can be only one.


They're all just Trafficant wannabes.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 09, 2017 05:41 PM (oVJmc)

167 >>Jeez, maybe my sister is on to something...

They are ridiculously strong. Fragile but strong.

Posted by: JackStraw at November 09, 2017 05:42 PM (/tuJf)

168 You like the turkey dry?

Posted by: The Deplorable Mr. Trumpkin at November 09, 2017 05:38 PM (wwd4n)

No, but I don't like the meat so wet it's mushy.

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 05:42 PM (Enq6K)

169 "also, aromatherapy

smells great"

We had a patch of "volunteer" mint in the yard when I was a kid. Best part of mowing the lawn.

Posted by: Rob Crawford at November 09, 2017 05:42 PM (9zKsP)

170 Walk on my newly seeded lawn and I'll roundhouse your ass!

Posted by: Cheri at November 09, 2017 05:42 PM (oiNtH)

171 Yes it smells wonderful. Cut lawn should be a scent for men. And its almost always a really nice day when you mow the lawn. I never minded doing it.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (39g3+)

I got 7 acres of grass with your name on it. Knock yourself out, no charge

Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 05:42 PM (4u7kU)

172 Notice how not one other Republican colleague seems to give a shit?

Democrats would be howling mad right now.
Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 05:27 PM (yXCUX)


That right there is a big difference between the Dems and the GOP. If a Dem makes a misstep or gets accused of something, they circle the wagons big time and launch a nasty counter-attack toward the accusers.

The GOP, on the other hand, run away as fast as they can.

Posted by: LCMS Rulz! at November 09, 2017 05:42 PM (3NjrP)

173 I can think of about a thousand things I would rather be doing then yard work. Get a guy.

Posted by: Under Fire at November 09, 2017 05:42 PM (mcI77)

174 >> I can think of about a thousand things I would rather be doing then yard work. Get a guy.


I can think of one.

Posted by: Louis CK at November 09, 2017 05:43 PM (lELxn)

175 173 I can think of about a thousand things I would rather be doing then yard work. Get a guy.
Posted by: Under Fire at November 09, 2017 05:42 PM (mcI77)

And we wonder about illegal aliens...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:43 PM (mbhDw)

176 I never liked cutting the grass, but I always loved seeding.

Posted by: Harvey Weinstein at November 09, 2017 05:44 PM (lELxn)

177 I'm surprised Ace isn't all over this today, but there's a big kerfluffle on Twitter about 'verified' (blue check mark) accounts. Apparently the usual suspects have discovered that some people they hate have a blue check mark and that is simply not to be allowed.

Further, several guys are going on about how you're more "legitimate" if you have that blue check. Twitter put out a statement talking about how the blue check gives people the impression that someone with that is "more important" than others and that they are examining policy to address this.

Possibly if Twitter had not announced official policy to ban people who say mean things to check marks (and not others) that might not be the impression people get.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:44 PM (39g3+)

178 i used to do the anesthesia trays for the OR and Labor/Delivery suites at a hospital here in Lost Angels... and did the audits and reconciliation on the narcs used (box record vs anesthesia chart).

same docs were always off, and always off on the same meds. even found partially used vials hidden/left behind in various rooms, to include their on-call rooms where they could nap between procedures.

no one ever made them rectify the errors, and no one ever did anything about the found meds.

also, i woke up half way through my colonoscopy at the VA last year, and remember all the details, even though they supposedly gave me 5mg of midazolam and 125mcg of fentanyl.

they don't know it yet, but this year, they are drawing that shit up right in front of me, and Resident 3vil will be there too, one way or another.

Posted by: redc1c4 at November 09, 2017 05:44 PM (P8FeH)

179 166
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 09, 2017 05:41 PM (oVJmc)

"Pfft!"

- - Flaming Skull Blagojevich

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:44 PM (mbhDw)

180 I would have thought that a horse kick like that would kill him. Ouch

Posted by: F.N.G. at November 09, 2017 05:41 PM (kiSdp)


Horse shoes or hooves make executing the five point palm exploding heart technique exceedingly difficult.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at November 09, 2017 05:44 PM (tbOMB)

181 9
I thought I saw some a-hole media liar say Rand deserved it.

Prick.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton


So, condoning violent assault.

Posted by: nerdygirl at November 09, 2017 05:44 PM (+lVUW)

182 >>>Like those tiny turtles with the spring loaded head.

i have one of those.

a pet rock would work too.

Posted by: concrete girl at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (MF4DY)

183 What did this guy do to cause 6 broken ribs?

Kicked or stomped him after blindsiding Rand to the ground.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at November 09, 2017 05:40 PM (QQ+il)


Grump, is this fact or a guess?

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (hLB6Q)

184 I got 7 acres of grass with your name on it. Knock yourself out, no charge
Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 05:42 PM (4u7kU)


You need a robomow.

https://usa.robomow.com/

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (fceHP)

185 My twitter account is suspended. I've never posted. Ever.

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (398bZ)

186 off topic, but I saw on the yahoo main page that "Samantha Bee Says Ivanka Trump Will Be America's First Woman President"

well, I could think of worse possibilities.

Posted by: mallfly the Peach of Hoboken at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (ILitO)

187 7 acres? who are you, Moo Moo?

Posted by: dantesed at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (88xKn)

188 This nutjob lefty needs to have the book thrown at him and be punished to the limit of what the law allows. And I would say the same thing if some right wing wacko attacked say, Chuck Schumer.

Posted by: RM at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (U3LtS)

189 "But I'll be damned if I can recall any football player who ever left the game and later had half a dozen broken ribs."

there's a reason they wear so many pads. That stuff is like body armor - even down their backs now, which you can see when the jersey get yanked.

And just ask Tony Romo what drove him out of the game.

Posted by: Tom Servo at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (k1TUh)

190 I once went head to head with a goat, a very small one. I swear he laughed out loud before he bumped me into next week.

i think the horse thing reminded me so I'm not off topic yo.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (7CM5W)

191 Leavenworth is so beautiful in the spring

Posted by: Former mass resident at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (vJFfv)

192 Now The Five are weighing in on Postal Prog.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:46 PM (PY9jH)

193 186 off topic, but I saw on the yahoo main page that "Samantha Bee Says Ivanka Trump Will Be America's First Woman President"

well, I could think of worse possibilities.

Posted by: mallfly the Peach of Hoboken at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (ILitO)


Someone who actually loves America is at least 66% of the game.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:46 PM (mbhDw)

194 At least there was no masturbation involved. Except, perhaps, on Shep's part.

Yeah, about that still pic of Sheppy-poo above. He looks like he's about to tell Anderson Cooper underneath the desk to slow down a bit, they're going live in 5...4...3...

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 09, 2017 05:46 PM (tRaq7)

195 Grump, is this fact or a guess?

It's my guess.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at November 09, 2017 05:47 PM (QQ+il)

196 >>I once went head to head with a goat, a very small one.


Who went first?

Posted by: garrett at November 09, 2017 05:47 PM (lELxn)

197 Assaulting a man while he's operatin' his lawnmower? That's an affront to God, I tell you what.

Posted by: Hank Hill at November 09, 2017 05:47 PM (oiItG)

198 171
Yes it smells wonderful. Cut lawn should be a scent for men. And its almost always a really nice day when you mow the lawn. I never minded doing it.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (39g3+)



I got 7 acres of grass with your name on it. Knock yourself out, no charge

Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 05:42 PM (4u7kU)



You got any settees with large cushions?

Posted by: Couch Fucker at November 09, 2017 05:48 PM (tbOMB)

199 Yeah, about that still pic of Sheppy-poo above. He
looks like he's about to tell Anderson Cooper underneath the desk to
slow down a bit, they're going live in 5...4...3...

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 09, 2017 05:46 PM (tRaq7)


GAH! *snort*

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:48 PM (PY9jH)

200 187 7 acres? who are you, Moo Moo?
Posted by: dantesed at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (88xKn)

No, a putz that should have stopped at 2

Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 05:48 PM (4u7kU)

201 Cut Clawn -a scent for Men. Get yours in time for Christmas, at your finer Department stores.

Posted by: Calvin Klein at November 09, 2017 05:48 PM (QC/4S)

202 Horses are a lot of contradictions. They are really big and strong, but really timid. They are really freaking idiotic, but very clever in some ways. They are very tough but very brittle. There's no way I'd own a horse. So expensive and so much care.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:48 PM (39g3+)

203 I once went head to head with a goat, a very small one.

...

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (7CM5W)


========

You're doing it wrong. Should be the other way round.

Posted by: Mohammed Mahmoud Muhammad at November 09, 2017 05:49 PM (/qEW2)

204 There can be only one.
They're all just Trafficant wannabes.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 09, 2017 05:41 PM (oVJmc)

Yup....in their small sad world of House HairDoos, Jim is a God to them.

No one will ever come close.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at November 09, 2017 05:49 PM (nUkMr)

205 I've heard a lot of anesthesiologists have drug problems. Just sayin'.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 05:26 PM (PY9jH)


This is true. Sampling the wares too often, so to speak. They are pretty much the lowest rung in the pecking order too.

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (hLB6Q)

uh-huh.

Posted by: Podiatrists. We're not even MDs. at November 09, 2017 05:49 PM (ihzOe)

206 Because it's a federal offense to threaten or assault a federal officer (which a Senator is).
---
And that's what happened, he assaulted a federal officer.

But INTENT is the new standard---for progs only, of course.

Posted by: Axeman at November 09, 2017 05:49 PM (2mC6G)

207 >>"Samantha Bee Says Ivanka Trump Will Be America's First Woman President"



That's about 1.65 Milli-Kohns of stupid, there.

Posted by: garrett at November 09, 2017 05:49 PM (lELxn)

208 >>>I would have thought that a horse kick like that would kill him. Ouch

he sustained a collapsed lung too.
and suffered from the pain forever more.

it's why i brought it up.
rand suffered a really big beatdown.

Posted by: concrete girl at November 09, 2017 05:49 PM (MF4DY)

209 I have had broken ribs one at a time. They hurt. I bet six at a time hurts a whole bunch.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at November 09, 2017 05:49 PM (gIRsn)

210 Crabgrass always drives me to felony assault too.

Posted by: a lurker at November 09, 2017 05:50 PM (xcsDN)

211 Luther Strange declines to say whether he'll run as a write-in candidate against Roy Moore.

http://tinyurl.com/y75ajtgh

Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at November 09, 2017 05:50 PM (398bZ)

212 If I were to hit a guy who is 5'5" from behind, putting my shoulder to his ribs and driving him into the ground, especially if I was able to get a running start and get my feet off the ground as we went down - I would expect several of his ribs to be fractured, and I would expect him not to be getting back up off the ground without help.

Little guys are fragile.

Posted by: Tom Servo at November 09, 2017 05:50 PM (k1TUh)

213 81 I'm probably getting a Costco chicken. The last couple of years the turkey has been a disappointment.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM (4ErVI)


I had a chicken back at Costco earlier this week for the first time in a couple of years during a tire rotation. It was awful--hollow, dry, and burnt. Nothing but massive amounts of bread with a few shreds of chicken. I should have actually taken it back to the counter and asked for a couple of slices of pizza.

#neveragain

Posted by: antisocial justice beatnik at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (5sQ8t)

214 My daughter use to ride horse, English. Never got kicked but did take a header off one once.


She had a woman who was her coach. She was older and had been around horses her whole life. At a show one time the coach was walking past a horse from behind and put her hand on the horse to let it know she was there. At that exact moment a bee or wasp stung the horse. She took a kick right to the face. Rushed to the hospital and had to have emergency plastic surgery. Saw her a few weeks later...surgeon did an excellent job.

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (Enq6K)

215 209 I have had broken ribs one at a time. They hurt. I bet six at a time hurts a whole bunch.
Posted by: Bandersnatch at November 09, 2017 05:49 PM (gIRsn)


I can't imagine what heart surgery patients go through since you can't get there without cracking some ribs.

Thinking back on my poor dad 14 years ago, this week in fact, when he had his bypasses.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (mbhDw)

216 Neighbor is 5 ft 8 and 166 lbs. something does not add up here.

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy - Nostrildamus at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (p+B3w)

217 chicken back -> chicken bake

Posted by: antisocial justice beatnik at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (5sQ8t)

218 With broken ribs there is nothing you can do but to remain immobile and let it heal right? And take lots of pain killers?

Posted by: IC at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (a0IVu)

219 For the person who was trying to remember a name in the last thread - Andrew WR, I think.

If I had more time and fewer kids I'd tell you about my research into why zebras were never domesticated. But the younger one is hungry.

Posted by: Mrs. Peel at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (JPRju)

220 Luther Strange declines to say whether he'll run as a write-in candidate against Roy Moore.

Thad Cochran Redux. A McConnell Classic.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (oVJmc)

221 I got 7 acres of grass with your name on it. Knock yourself out, no charge

We had about 3 acres of lawn to mow when I was a teenager. Took a while to get all that done but it was enjoyable. We probably should have had a rider, though, that's an awful lot to push around.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (39g3+)

222
Does it matter the motive if you attack an elected federal politician, grass clippings or political?

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (r+sAi)

223 I report. You decide.
Posted by: Shep!, now with more Shep at November 09, 2017 05:23 PM (ctuyM)
---
You can report, but we decide everything.

Posted by: Asshole Judges at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (2mC6G)

224 Yes it smells wonderful. Cut lawn should be a scent for men. And its almost always a really nice day when you mow the lawn. I never minded doing it.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:39 PM (39g3+)



I got 7 acres of grass with your name on it. Knock yourself out, no charge



Goats. End of season? Cabrito.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 09, 2017 05:52 PM (vVRlw)

225 This is great news. I've had my differences with Rand Paul but he's a good man and I have nothing but respect for him.

Posted by: WhatWhatWhat? at November 09, 2017 05:52 PM (ul9CR)

226 211 Luther Strange declines to say whether he'll run as a write-in candidate against Roy Moore.

http://tinyurl.com/y75ajtgh
Posted by: Cloyd Freud, Unemployed at November 09, 2017 05:50 PM (398bZ)


I smell a giant McConnell-sized rat here. I think these charges are going nowhere and that bastard is going to sabotage Moore and give the Dems a senate seat.

WAR.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:52 PM (mbhDw)

227 I have had broken ribs one at a time. They hurt. I bet six at a time hurts a whole bunch.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at November 09, 2017 05:49 PM (gIRsn)


* Attempts to multiply 1 broken rib by 6 times. Gives up in frustration. *

Don't you know the rule?

Posted by: Ace Tractor Seat Supply at November 09, 2017 05:52 PM (ajiE5)

228 >>>If I were to hit a guy who is 5'5" from behind, putting my shoulder to his ribs and driving him into the ground, especially if I was able to get a running start and get my feet off the ground as we went down - I would expect several of his ribs to be fractured, and I would expect him not to be getting back up off the ground without help.

Are you 5-8 and 166 pounds?

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy - Nostrildamus at November 09, 2017 05:52 PM (p+B3w)

229 "My twitter account is suspended. I've never posted. Ever."

But you were THINKING about it, weren't you?

Posted by: goodluckduck at November 09, 2017 05:52 PM (yqvys)

230 Does it matter the motive if you attack an elected federal politician, grass clippings or political?

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at November 09, 2017 05:51 PM (r+sAi)
---
It shouldn't. But we live in the post-Hatecrime laws days.

Posted by: Axeman at November 09, 2017 05:52 PM (2mC6G)

231 Ace previously linked this statute

https://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/text/18/115

Posted by: Grump928(C) at November 09, 2017 05:53 PM (QQ+il)

232 Btw, I blame the media for a lot of this crap.

Condoning violence against Congressmen, and republicans in general, makes them complicit.

Not reporting on Hollywood sexual assaults but passing or prohibiting the stories, makes them complicit.

Turning the country into one big, daily clusterfuck of fake news, propaganda and hate...right on their doorstep.

I don't know what circle of Dante's hell they'll be in, but I hope it's a fiery one.

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:53 PM (hLB6Q)

233 Alton Brown brined turkey recipe. Never fails to be delicious and juicy.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner
at November 09, 2017 05:33 PM (tbOMB)


I use a citrus brine, I like it better than Alton's; but I use his cooking method (500 for 1/2 hour, 350 until done, with "turkey triangle" over the breasts) and it works fantastic. I make giblet stock to use with turkey gravy packets. Yum.

Posted by: Jeff Weimer at November 09, 2017 05:53 PM (Bl5Zt)

234 216. What doesn't add up?

Posted by: Apple Fritters While Rome Burns at November 09, 2017 05:53 PM (fA1SL)

235 >>>Luther Strange declines to say whether he'll run as a write-in candidate against Roy Moore.

***Bannon stops drinking Smoothie***

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy - Nostrildamus at November 09, 2017 05:53 PM (p+B3w)

236 Have details been released about the nature of the attack? What exactly did this leftwing lunatic do?

Posted by: Northernlurker, the lurkingest lurker of the north. Still proudly lurking. at November 09, 2017 05:53 PM (nBr1j)

237 "Are you 5-8 and 166 pounds?"

No. I hadn't seen the 160's in - well lets just call it decades.

Posted by: Tom Servo at November 09, 2017 05:54 PM (k1TUh)

238 but seriously, do neighbors really get angry about grass clippings? What are they mad about?

Posted by: IC at November 09, 2017 05:54 PM (a0IVu)

239 This nutjob lefty needs to have the book thrown at him and be punished to the limit of what the law allows. And I would say the same thing if some right wing wacko attacked say, Chuck Schumer.

Posted by: RM at November 09, 2017 05:45 PM (U3LtS)


========

Exactly. But we do not roll that way. The Democrats have an unfair advantage in that they are allowed to fight dirty.

Posted by: Mohammed Mahmoud Muhammad at November 09, 2017 05:54 PM (/qEW2)

240 Can't say Rand is my problem but hope his attacker looses his shirt.

Posted by: Skip at November 09, 2017 05:54 PM (aC6Sd)

241 196 >>I once went head to head with a goat, a very small one.

Who went first?

Posted by: garrett at November 09, 2017 05:47 PM (lELxn)

So we're at a petting zoo at the Phoenix fair, and I'll do anything to embarrass Heidi and I love goats (oh just shut up) i think they are just hilarious. So there's a few small ones with nubs for horns and I get down on all four pet him and put my forehead against his. Big mistake. (They have a very bony head btw). Yeah, he pushes a little and I push back. I didnt see it coming. He didn't even back up. just lowered his head and brought it up fast and hard. knocked me stupid and I had to listen to Heidi laugh and tell evryone why I had those two red welts on my forehead. Do not do this.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 05:54 PM (7CM5W)

242 Goats are good at clearing brush and cropping grass, but you get chocolate Kix everywhere. Its pretty dry though and good for the grass.

Sheep will chew it down to the roots, they are terrible for lawns.

We had geese when I was at the farm house. They are amazing watchdogs, incredibly keen senses. But they crap everywhere. "Crap through a goose" is not just a saying. They're like a poop hose. The lawn was super green and lush but not fun to walk around on in bare feet.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:54 PM (39g3+)

243 I smell a giant McConnell-sized rat here. I think these charges are going nowhere and that bastard is going to sabotage Moore and give the Dems a senate seat.

WAR.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:52 PM (mbhDw)

That would make McLame's vote so much more swingy.

Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 05:55 PM (4u7kU)

244 I like goats, they are friendly

Posted by: Abdullah Abdullah at November 09, 2017 05:55 PM (QC/4S)

245 I have 10 acres. When I moved in about 3 were lawn and 7 I rent out for somebody else to grow crops. I had the farmer who rents plow under another 1 1/2 acres of lawn for crops after mowing it for a year.

Posted by: X-ray at November 09, 2017 05:55 PM (qCyRm)

246 241, Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 05:54 PM (7CM5W)

That's what you get for trying to embarrass the wife in public.

Posted by: IC at November 09, 2017 05:55 PM (a0IVu)

247 >>>190 I once went head to head with a goat, a very small one. I swear he laughed out loud before he bumped me into next week

we had a huge wether named trouble. the biggest and meanest sheep to everybody but me. he would trot up to people who deserved it and duck his head and push them back. very protective, like a good dog.

Posted by: concrete girl at November 09, 2017 05:55 PM (MF4DY)

248
To all you people who had broken ribs,


this jack-off's for you!

...

You can watch....I don't mind.



Really, it's better that way.



Think of it as spirit healing.

Posted by: Louis C.K. at November 09, 2017 05:55 PM (NyJwR)

249
Oh right, there is certainly a huge personal lawsuit awaiting for this slime ball too. Good.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at November 09, 2017 05:55 PM (r+sAi)

250 242 Goats are good at clearing brush and cropping grass, but you get chocolate Kix everywhere. Its pretty dry though and good for the grass.

Goats smell something awful

Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 05:56 PM (4u7kU)

251 Rand Paul claims 5-7 and 157.
Neighbor is 5-8 and 166.
:::scratches head:::
Imma gonna need the crime scene diorama for this.

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy - Nostrildamus at November 09, 2017 05:56 PM (p+B3w)

252 I don't mind the smell, they don't mind mine either

Posted by: Abdullah Abdullah at November 09, 2017 05:56 PM (QC/4S)

253 242 Goats are good at clearing brush and cropping grass, but you get chocolate Kix everywhere. Its pretty dry though and good for the grass.

Sheep will chew it down to the roots, they are terrible for lawns.

We had geese when I was at the farm house. They are amazing watchdogs, incredibly keen senses. But they crap everywhere. "Crap through a goose" is not just a saying. They're like a poop hose. The lawn was super green and lush but not fun to walk around on in bare feet.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:54 PM (39g3+)


When I was in Norway, they have grass roofs and goats get on top to graze and keep them trimmed.

As for crap through a goose, look up Errol Flynn "duck necklace."

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:56 PM (mbhDw)

254 Goats are really nice critters, they are like dogs that don't bark or slobber on you. The billy goats do stink though. And they are kind of aggressive.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 05:56 PM (39g3+)

255 He didn't even back up. just lowered his head and brought it up fast and hard. knocked me stupid and I had to listen to Heidi laugh and tell evryone why I had those two red welts on my forehead. Do not do this.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 05:54 PM (7CM5W)


I am LOLing!

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 05:56 PM (Enq6K)

256 This will make you sick to your stomach
www.frontpagemag.com/fpm/268367/when-clinton-donors-prosecute-and-judge-trump-daniel-greenfield

Posted by: Skip at November 09, 2017 05:57 PM (aC6Sd)

257 Six broken ribs pretty much means it wasn't just a tackle.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 09, 2017 05:57 PM (oVJmc)

258 256 This will make you sick to your stomach
www.frontpagemag.com/fpm/268367/when-clinton-donors-prosecute-and-judge-trump-daniel-greenfield
Posted by: Skip at November 09, 2017 05:57 PM (aC6Sd)


Yup. Linked in the morning roundup.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 05:58 PM (mbhDw)

259 The media is trying to dismiss this but "fake news" amounted to a death threat against them.

Posted by: Northernlurker, the lurkingest lurker of the north. Still proudly lurking. at November 09, 2017 05:58 PM (nBr1j)

260 251 Rand Paul claims 5-7 and 157.
Neighbor is 5-8 and 166.
:::scratches head:::
Imma gonna need the crime scene diorama for this.

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy - Nostrildamus at November 09, 2017 05:56 PM (p+B3w)

I suspect the element of surprise and some type of 'weapon' was used.

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 05:58 PM (Enq6K)

261 246 241, Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 05:54 PM (7CM5W)

That's what you get for trying to embarrass the wife in public.

Posted by: IC at November 09, 2017 05:55 PM (a0IVu)

Lol. Yeah, there's been a few that have backfired. She just walks away now and pretends she doesn't know me.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 05:58 PM (7CM5W)

262 Rand Paul breaks ribs, blames neighbor

Posted by: The NYT at November 09, 2017 05:58 PM (QC/4S)

263 Senator injured in fall.

Posted by: Washington Post at November 09, 2017 05:59 PM (QQ+il)

264 >>>Six broken ribs pretty much means it wasn't just a tackle.

Arrest warrant says tackling. Nothing else.
Maybe time for a calcium supplement?

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy - Nostrildamus at November 09, 2017 05:59 PM (p+B3w)

265 >>> Imma gonna need the crime scene diorama for this.

Yep. Some guy 160 breaking six ribs with just a tackle? I'm thinking there were a couple follow up kicks.

Posted by: fluffy at November 09, 2017 05:59 PM (cHbmY)

266 PDT needs to take McTurtle to the woodshed for pulling this shit. Fire his ugly wife as well.

Posted by: Under Fire at November 09, 2017 06:00 PM (mcI77)

267 A quarrel about lawn care boundaries does not result in 5 fractured ribs! Doctor Knockout meant to do some damage. Since he is up for a Federal offense, he can go to federal prison with terrorists, drug lords, and other guys who have done much worse than break some bones.



Posted by: exdem13 at November 09, 2017 06:00 PM (wZznc)

268 A blind side full run and shoulder hit will do damage, hasn't been mention of any weapons but wonder ( chain saw bayonet maybe)

Posted by: Skip at November 09, 2017 06:00 PM (aC6Sd)

269 Maybe he was tackled and fell onto the mower

Posted by: NCKate at November 09, 2017 06:00 PM (uMNKJ)

270 Rand Paul claims 5-7 and 157.
Neighbor is 5-8 and 166.



Midget on midget violence. Rand is probably the only guy the neighbor knows whom he can tackle.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at November 09, 2017 06:00 PM (gIRsn)

271 Why call it "going Progressive Postal"? Just call it "going Progressive".

Posted by: George LeS at November 09, 2017 06:00 PM (+TcCF)

272 If you get a run on someone and catch them totally by surprise, I could see some pretty bad damage. But we'll know more later. I mean Rand is in his 50s, he's not exactly a spring chicken. I would guess mowing the lawn is pretty much the extent of his exercise.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 06:00 PM (39g3+)

273 How much for just one rib?

Posted by: Chris Rock at November 09, 2017 06:01 PM (bc2Lc)

274 I can't imagine what heart surgery patients go through since you can't get there without cracking some ribs.


They saw your sternum in half. I can still feel the wires holding mine together while it healed. 3 of them. Have the X-ray image too.

They gave me a nice heart-shaped pillow to grab every time I sat up, rolled over or basically had to do any movement with my upper body. They also told me not to raise my hands above my shoulders for a few weeks afterwards.

The incision still itches occasionally and they clipped a nerve in my leg when they harvested one of the veins for one of my vessel bypasses, so that feels sorta funny still.

Lots and lots of fun that takes a few years to fully recover from. Beats the alternative, though.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 09, 2017 06:01 PM (tRaq7)

275 250 242 Goats are good at clearing brush and cropping grass, but you get chocolate Kix everywhere. Its pretty dry though and good for the grass.

Goats smell something awful

Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 05:56 PM (4u7kU)

Really? Well i havent been around a lot of them but petted a few. No more than a wet lab. IMHO.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 06:01 PM (7CM5W)

276 Thing is, if you are not in great shape and you blast someone that hard? You're going down for a while, too.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 06:01 PM (39g3+)

277 Oh, it's 5 pm. Wonder what I'm making for dinner?

Might be an egg dinner night...

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 06:01 PM (Enq6K)

278 I read that garden psycho ran into Paul and Paul's ribs hit the handle of hit lawn mower. Plausible?

Posted by: Under Fire at November 09, 2017 06:01 PM (mcI77)

279 >.The Morning Joe "salon" just laughed this off the other day. Said Rand probably threw a twig on the guy's yard.




These are the same people who get physically ill over a Trump tweet, right?

Like, Mika gets shaken to her core over words, but 6 broken ribs and internal injuries - giggles? Disgusting.

Posted by: Lizzy at November 09, 2017 06:01 PM (W+vEI)

280 Before he is locked up for the rest of his life, I would really like to hear this asshole's confession.

What did he think Paul had done wrong and why? He obviously has strong emotions linked to really stupid ideas, like all liberals, but knowing the specifics will allow us to correct the educational system better, if we ever get that opportunity. Knowing why he thought this was justified would be a help in deprogramming libtards.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at November 09, 2017 06:02 PM (/qEW2)

281 Trump should Tweet he deserves to go to Gitmo just to shut up Leftists.

Posted by: Skip at November 09, 2017 06:02 PM (aC6Sd)

282 "Sheep will chew it down to the roots, they are terrible for lawns."

I think this is why all of those ranchers wanted to drive the sheep people out in the movies?

Posted by: goodluckduck at November 09, 2017 06:02 PM (yqvys)

283 What NCKate said - maybe he fell on the mower?

Also - are any details public about the whole incident? Specifically how did the attack get stopped? Doesn't sound like Paul would be in great shape to defend himself against a continued pummeling. Did someone intervene? Lazy, curious minds want to know.

Posted by: rhomboid at November 09, 2017 06:02 PM (QDnY+)

284 Goats smell something awful

Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 05:56 PM (4u7kU)

Really? Well i havent been around a lot of them but petted a few. No more than a wet lab.


The nanny goats don't smell bad. The billy goats do. They reek. I think they whiz on themselves for extra pheramone goodness.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 06:02 PM (39g3+)

285 277 Oh, it's 5 pm. Wonder what I'm making for dinner?

Might be an egg dinner night...
Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 06:01 PM (Enq6K)


Shrimp and chorizo with leftover spaghetti garlic and oil. And a big salad and wine.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:03 PM (mbhDw)

286 "Imma gonna need the crime scene diorama for this."

Who wants to knock this idiot to the ground? And how much will you pay to put the boot in? One swing per ticket, please!

Posted by: Rob Crawford at November 09, 2017 06:03 PM (9zKsP)

287 267 A quarrel about lawn care boundaries does not result in 5 fractured ribs! Doctor Knockout meant to do some damage. Since he is up for a Federal offense, he can go to federal prison with terrorists, drug lords, and other guys who have done much worse than break some bones.



Posted by: exdem13 at November 09, 2017 06:00 PM (wZznc)


That would be federal "pound me in the ass" prison.

Posted by: Jeff Weimer at November 09, 2017 06:03 PM (Bl5Zt)

288 I think this is why all of those ranchers wanted to drive the sheep people out in the movies?

That and they muddy up water really bad, they don't stand at the edge and sip as neatly as cattle. Mostly it was just "I hate sheep cause they ain't cows" though.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 06:03 PM (39g3+)

289 Story I read was Rand was bent over picking up a branch, had ear protection on so didn't hear, most likely engine of mower was still running.

Posted by: Skip at November 09, 2017 06:03 PM (aC6Sd)

290

Billy goats can be great fun. Not in the Jihadi way, you idiots.

My father and his brothers got this damned billy goat trained to fight. They had great fun butting heads so to speak.

Well, one time my grandmother was out in the garden, bent over weeding, and that goat charged her and knocked her into next week.

That was the end of that goat.

And as a teenager, a buddy of mine who had some goats and I had similar fun. A goat enjoys a challenge to a dual.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at November 09, 2017 06:04 PM (8O3HH)

291 283. Hit & run?

Posted by: Apple Fritters While Rome Burns at November 09, 2017 06:04 PM (fA1SL)

292 garden psycho ran into Paul and Paul's ribs hit the handle of hit lawn mower.


===
Witness confirms, Rand Paul suffers lawn mower accident

Posted by: The NYT at November 09, 2017 06:04 PM (QC/4S)

293 281 Trump should Tweet he deserves to go to Gitmo just to shut up Leftists.

Posted by: Skip at November 09, 2017 06:02 PM (aC6Sd)

Perfect.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 06:04 PM (7CM5W)

294
That would be federal "pound me in the ass" prison.
Posted by: Jeff Weimer at November 09, 2017 06:03 PM (Bl5Zt)


Shouldn't that be "pound YOU in the ass" prison?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:05 PM (mbhDw)

295 Shrimp and chorizo with leftover spaghetti garlic and oil. And a big salad and wine.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:03 PM (mbhDw)

Don't I wish!

I can't eat shrimp and hubby can't eat chorizo.

Yeah, we suck. Totally agree.

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 06:05 PM (Enq6K)

296 >Goats smell something awful


It's the carrots in the chili.

Posted by: garrett at November 09, 2017 06:05 PM (lELxn)

297 Really? Well i havent been around a lot of them but petted a few. No more than a wet lab. IMHO.
Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 06:01 PM (7CM5W)

Pet a billy after he's rolled around in his piss and stuff. I dunno, you might find that delightful. Nothing amazes me anymore

Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 06:05 PM (4u7kU)

298 Arrest warrant says tackling. Nothing else.
Maybe time for a calcium supplement?


Who knows what they landed on. Hitting something hard with the weight of another person on you can do some pretty good damage.

Posted by: no good deed at November 09, 2017 06:05 PM (eIQHF)

299 Rand Paul and his attacker were quite petite...like garden gnomes.

Posted by: IC at November 09, 2017 06:05 PM (a0IVu)

300 The nanny goats don't smell bad. The billy goats do. They reek. I think they whiz on themselves for extra pheramone goodness.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at November 09, 2017 06:02 PM (39g3+)

So chicks like that? Asking for a friend.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 06:06 PM (7CM5W)

301
Witness confirms, Rand Paul suffers lawn mower accident
Posted by: The NYT at November 09, 2017 06:04 PM (QC/4S)

Sub-headline: Strong Smell of Alcohol Detected

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:06 PM (mbhDw)

302 Shrimp and chorizo with leftover spaghetti garlic and oil. And a big salad and wine.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:03 PM (mbhDw)


oh, wine, nice idea

potato gnocchi here, with tomato and pesto sauce
salad

and now wine!

must go and get all of this started

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 09, 2017 06:06 PM (fceHP)

303
I'm beginning to suspect that Democrats don't make the best of neighbors. Didn't use to have any.

Now I have one. Major pain in the ass. Clueless fvcks.

Posted by: Ace Tractor Seat Supply at November 09, 2017 06:06 PM (ajiE5)

304 This is why you need gazing balls in the garden. To see who's sneaking up on you.

Posted by: Under Fire at November 09, 2017 06:06 PM (mcI77)

305 Rand Paul gets in the way of neighbor, suffers fall

Posted by: The NYT at November 09, 2017 06:06 PM (QC/4S)

306 It's the carrots in the chili.
Posted by: garrett at November 09, 2017 06:05 PM (lELxn)

That's an automatic disqualification

Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 06:06 PM (4u7kU)

307 Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:05 PM (mbhDw)

Office Space joke.

Posted by: Jeff Weimer at November 09, 2017 06:06 PM (Bl5Zt)

308 299 Rand Paul and his attacker were quite petite...like garden gnomes.
Posted by: IC at November 09, 2017 06:05 PM (a0IVu)


Sky Lo Lo vs Lord Beaverbrook? (not Max, the actual midget).

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:06 PM (mbhDw)

309
Yep, billy goats piss on their "beards" under their chin all the time.

Posted by: publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear at November 09, 2017 06:07 PM (8O3HH)

310 Pet a billy after he's rolled around in his piss and stuff. I dunno, you might find that delightful. Nothing amazes me anymore

Posted by: sofa saver at November 09, 2017 06:05 PM (4u7kU

What's with guys and that?

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 06:07 PM (7CM5W)

311 Oh, it's 5 pm. Wonder what I'm making for dinner?



Might be an egg dinner night...

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 06:01

Heh, I was wondering the same thing. Have been trying to use up everything in the fridge. I have eggs, butter, ham and english muffins. So I'm doing eggs benedict.

Posted by: Infidel at November 09, 2017 06:07 PM (4ZKcy)

312 A tackle on a defenseless guy, any halfway competent version of driving him into the ground with your shoulder, will break a half dozen of his ribs.

Posted by: Bandersnatch at November 09, 2017 06:07 PM (gIRsn)

313 304 This is why you need gazing balls in the garden. To see who's sneaking up on you.
Posted by: Under Fire at November 09, 2017 06:06 PM (mcI77)


Gazing balls. Is that Shep being wistful?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:08 PM (mbhDw)

314
Pee on your beard?

50 dollars.

Posted by: Russian Escort at November 09, 2017 06:08 PM (8O3HH)

315 311 Oh, it's 5 pm. Wonder what I'm making for dinner?



Might be an egg dinner night...

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 06:01

Heh, I was wondering the same thing. Have been trying to use up everything in the fridge. I have eggs, butter, ham and english muffins. So I'm doing eggs benedict.
Posted by: Infidel at November 09, 2017 06:07 PM (4ZKcy)


If you have spaghetti, bacon, some cream and parmesan or pecorino romano, you could do pasta carbonara

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:09 PM (mbhDw)

316 304
This is why you need gazing balls in the garden. To see who's sneaking up on you.



Posted by: Under Fire at November 09, 2017 06:06 PM (mcI77)



Pro Tip: Do not gaze into the balls.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at November 09, 2017 06:09 PM (tbOMB)

317 horses? I worked with horses for six months in Colorado decades ago. Got to train them a little, learned to trim hooves a little, rode out in the big BLM a little. Little snow that winter, even Crested Butte was closed part of the season for lack of snow. So my job was largely prying from horse hockies off the pasture, since there was no snow. But it was gorgeous ...

Best ride of my life ... a horse renamed Jerry, used to be called Geronimo because it would run off ... a thoroughbred. It took off on me and I just let it run, across a mountain ridge for a half mile ... nice smooth ride ... like flying. Never got kicked or bit.

Posted by: illiniwek at November 09, 2017 06:10 PM (/aIFg)

318 316
Pro Tip: Do not gaze into the balls.
Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at November 09, 2017 06:09 PM (tbOMB)


"Killjoy."

- - Kevin Spacey, Louis CK, Harvey, Bill, Harry...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:10 PM (mbhDw)

319 So if you take all the actual violence visited upon Republicans in office, add to that the actual violence done to those who support Republicans ( I'm counting Trump, so add MAGA hats ), and then add violence done to whites by non-whites merely for the suspicion of being a racisty racist who voted for Trump, and put all that on one side.

Then, take all the hate crimes that were laid at the feet of Trump and supporters by the media, only to be found as hoaxes (retractions by msm not forthcoming) and no punishment of the actual perpetrators in sight.
Put that on the other side.

See? It all balances out! Nothing wrong in this country that a little perspective can't work out.

Posted by: OneEyedJack at November 09, 2017 06:10 PM (z79tQ)

320 Husband is away tonight, so something simple for me. Salad maybe.

I've actually enjoyed him being away this week. I've finally been able to get off my foot and let it try to heal.

Gotta get it well so I can do Thanksgiving here.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 06:10 PM (PY9jH)

321 313. We called them 'witch balls,' growing up. Only the old folks had them.

I hear from others who've overheard conversations between ne'er-do-wells that it takes a good, solid hit from a fishing sinker fired outta a slingshot to break one.

Posted by: Apple Fritters While Rome Burns at November 09, 2017 06:10 PM (fA1SL)

322 Pro Tip: Do not gaze into the balls.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at November 09, 2017 06:09 PM (tbOMB)

Especially a goats balls.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 06:10 PM (7CM5W)

323 'ettes should be commenting on Melania's latest - her Chinese-inspired get-up worn to the state dinner (apparently).

Surely, smart coastal/urban Americans can only shake their heads and sigh, mortified, that after 8 years of elegance and strength from FLOTUS, we now have this .......

Or, then again, maybe not. Maybe not at all. (she looked great, as usual)


Posted by: rhomboid at November 09, 2017 06:10 PM (QDnY+)

324 Assaulting a man on his lawn tractor? I'd open up a can of Alamo and a case of whoop ass!

Posted by: Hank Hill at November 09, 2017 06:10 PM (bc2Lc)

325 If you have spaghetti, bacon, some cream and parmesan or pecorino romano, you could do pasta carbonara

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:09 PM (mbhDw)


Just so y'all feel sorry for me. Husband can't eat beef or pork. Well, he could...then we'd just drive to the ER and wait until he blowed up real good.

Oh and he's paleo.

Yeah, FML.

I might just throw the eggs at him when he comes in.

Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 06:10 PM (Enq6K)

326 317 Posted by: illiniwek at November 09, 2017 06:10 PM (/aIFg)


Makes me think of "Chestnut Mare." One of my fave songs.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:11 PM (mbhDw)

327 A-hole had it coming, he whipped his dick out and started jerkin' it.

Posted by: Rand Paul's neighbor at November 09, 2017 06:11 PM (6n332)

328 Doesn't Trump know some mafia guys in NYC?

They can take Yertle to a warehouse and twist his nuts in a vise until he screams himself to death.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 06:11 PM (4ErVI)

329 216
Neighbor is 5 ft 8 and 166 lbs. something does not add up here.
----
That is because a tackle does not break ribs. A tackle only breaks ribs if The Undertaker tackles you through the top of the cage at Wrestlemania. Doctor Knockout put Rand Paul on the ground, then put the boot in. Some vigourous heel stomps will do the trick. "Fourth degree misdemeanor" my hairy caucasian tushie, he meant to do damage. The FBI agrees with me, I think.

Posted by: exdem13 at November 09, 2017 06:12 PM (wZznc)

330 106 "Jesse Watters is feeling really sorry for the women involved in the Roy Moore story. He thinks Moore should step down."

If the GOPe hung around with their constituents instead of Democrats, they wouldn't assume he's guilty.
Posted by: Rob Crawford at November 09, 2017 05:34 PM (9zKsP)



Mike Pence isn't looking so stupid now, is he?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 09, 2017 06:12 PM (gLfJd)

331 KC detective ends interview after suspect answers question with 'loud fart'


http://tinyurl.com/y8cq5kjd

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 09, 2017 06:12 PM (oVJmc)

332 This is true. Sampling the wares too often, so to speak. They are pretty much the lowest rung in the pecking order too.
Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 05:30 PM


It ain't easy being a gas passer.


Posted by: Your local anesthesiologist at November 09, 2017 06:12 PM (ctuyM)

333
Nothing but massive amounts of bread with a few shreds of chicken.

Where'd you get it from, that food counter?
Dack is talking about the cooked roasted whole chicken in the back of the store at the meat dept.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 06:12 PM (yXCUX)

334 320 Husband is away tonight, so something simple for me. Salad maybe.

I've actually enjoyed him being away this week. I've finally been able to get off my foot and let it try to heal.

Gotta get it well so I can do Thanksgiving here.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 09, 2017 06:10 PM (PY9jH)

Yeah I'll bet limping around on that foot getting him sammiches and beers is rough.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob at November 09, 2017 06:12 PM (7CM5W)

335 328 Doesn't Trump know some mafia guys in NYC?

They can take Yertle to a warehouse and twist his nuts in a vise until he screams himself to death.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 06:11 PM (4ErVI)


There is no mafia. And if you keep saying there is I'll have your ribs broken.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:12 PM (mbhDw)

336 282 "Sheep will chew it down to the roots, they are terrible for lawns."

I think this is why all of those ranchers wanted to drive the sheep people out in the movies?
Posted by: goodluckduck at November 09, 2017 06:02 PM (yqvys)
---------------------------------
That and all the fences blocking pasture and cattle drive routes.
I think a cow wrote "Don't Fence Me In."

Posted by: Margarita,voyaging to the edge of crisp at November 09, 2017 06:12 PM (0jtPF)

337
You wan' gazing ball, Yankee boy?

Five dolla.

Posted by: "Miss" Pul Mai Kok, Thai Escort at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (8O3HH)

338
How is Costco's food, anyway?

I never even *thought* about eating there because all I want to do is get the hell outta that hive of scum of villainy and stupid old people.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (yXCUX)

339 331 KC detective ends interview after suspect answers question with 'loud fart'


http://tinyurl.com/y8cq5kjd
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 09, 2017 06:12 PM (oVJmc)


Hands up, don't... ?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (mbhDw)

340 I thought I read that there was some sort of property line dispute? That Paul's kids kept playing on what this asshole thinks is his property?

Also, who is filing the charges? Why would Paul have to be told what to expect? Wouldn't he be the one filing?!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (irQk/)

341 No shit!

Posted by: KentAllard at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (TQw9b)

342
What do they sell at Costco, anyway, hot dogs and stuff?

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (yXCUX)

343 In August McConnell's favorable numbers in Kentucky were 18%.

I can't find anything more recent, but 18% is on par with flaming whale shit.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (4ErVI)

344 A tackle only breaks ribs if The Undertaker tackles
you through the top of the cage at Wrestlemania.
Posted by: exdem13 at November 09, 2017 06:12 PM


What am I, chopped liver?

Posted by: The Big Show at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (ctuyM)

345 fake news is all we got

Posted by: CNN at November 09, 2017 06:14 PM (6dFYM)

346 338
How is Costco's food, anyway?

I never even *thought* about eating there because all I want to do is get the hell outta that hive of scum of villainy and stupid old people.
Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (yXCUX)


Used to buy from them when I lived in LA 20 years ago and the food was very good and relatively cheap.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:14 PM (mbhDw)

347 338
How is Costco's food, anyway?

I never even *thought* about eating there because all I want to do is get the hell outta that hive of scum of villainy and stupid old people.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (yXCUX)

The chickens are really good.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 06:14 PM (4ErVI)

348 >>Jesse Watters is feeling really sorry for the women involved in the Roy Moore story. He thinks Moore should step down."

Waters gig is fucking stale. I can't believe he's still around after O'Fucktard got canned.

Posted by: Under Fire at November 09, 2017 06:14 PM (mcI77)

349 343 In August McConnell's favorable numbers in Kentucky were 18%.

I can't find anything more recent, but 18% is on par with flaming whale shit.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (4ErVI)


Worse than Ed Gillespie.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:15 PM (mbhDw)

350 Doesn't Trump know some mafia guys in NYC?
...
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 06:11 PM (4ErVI)

Who the f'ck told you about that ? We don't know no "Trump".

Posted by: Rocco Genovese at November 09, 2017 06:15 PM (QC/4S)

351 Execute the fucker

Posted by: james the deplorable disciple of kek at November 09, 2017 06:15 PM (jxw6R)

352 Mike Pence isn't looking so stupid now, is he?
---
You think that if someone made up a story about Pence, WaPo wouldn't run with it?

Posted by: Methos at November 09, 2017 06:15 PM (XQvuQ)

353 Remember what you were saying about people in the burbs, Art, people like Skip, people who mow their lawn for the 800th time, and then SNAP?

Guy was probably a big Tom Hanks fan.

Posted by: Archer at November 09, 2017 06:15 PM (gbWkA)

354
No, I mean the food counter at Costco.

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 06:16 PM (yXCUX)

355 What's difference between Sen. McConnell and a road kill skunk?

Posted by: torabora at November 09, 2017 06:16 PM (6dFYM)

356 329 216
Neighbor is 5 ft 8 and 166 lbs. something does not add up here.
----
That is because a tackle does not break ribs. A tackle only breaks ribs if The Undertaker tackles you through the top of the cage at Wrestlemania. Doctor Knockout put Rand Paul on the ground, then put the boot in. Some vigourous heel stomps will do the trick. "Fourth degree misdemeanor" my hairy caucasian tushie, he meant to do damage. The FBI agrees with me, I think.
Posted by: exdem13 at November 09, 2017 06:12 PM (wZznc)


This.

I had exactly the same thought: football players do not often break ribs (the only exception being the occasional QB who gets pounded by 300 lb. D-linemen). Even then, it's usually a floating rib that gets broken, and shoulder pads only protect the upper part of the rib cage, not the floating ribs or the lowest non-floating ribs.

To break SIX ribs - meaning at least two non-floating ribs - I suspect you'd pretty much have to stomp someone and/or elbow drop him. That was no incidental love tap that did that.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 09, 2017 06:16 PM (gLfJd)

357 The mechanical engineer part of me wants to do the calculations for a 5'7" tall, 160lb guy running at about 3 MPH towards a few 1" dia pieces of floating bone tenuously attached to a spine just to see how much energy was involved in that attack.

Then I want to be on the jury that sends the progtarded attacker to a Federal PHITA prison for a few years on a terrorism charge.

Physical attacks that could effect a political outcome is the definition of terror. Not having Paul in place to vote as a result of an assault certainly qualifies.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 09, 2017 06:16 PM (tRaq7)

358 You wan' gazing ball, Yankee boy? Five dolla. You Red Sox boy, free.
Posted by: "Miss" Pul Mai Kok, Thai Escort at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM


FIFY.

Posted by: B. Ruth at November 09, 2017 06:17 PM (ctuyM)

359 352 Mike Pence isn't looking so stupid now, is he?
---
You think that if someone made up a story about Pence, WaPo wouldn't run with it?
Posted by: Methos at November 09, 2017 06:15 PM (XQvuQ)



Well, you raise a good point. "We're just asking questions here (i.e., so don't sue us for libel), but ...."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 09, 2017 06:17 PM (gLfJd)

360 Costco is anti-2A. They can go have knowledge with themselves as far as I'm concerned. A neighbor works in their HQ and she is the typical liberal asshole.

Posted by: Under Fire at November 09, 2017 06:17 PM (mcI77)

361

I told you: He broke ribs getting slammed against the handle of the lawn mower. (I'm guessing)

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 06:17 PM (yXCUX)

362
What's difference between Sen. McConnell and a road kill skunk?
Posted by: torabora at November 09, 2017 06:16 PM (6dFYM)


The skunk has skid marks in front of it

Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic at November 09, 2017 06:18 PM (lKyWE)

363
Costco is anti-2A. They can go have knowledge with themselves as far as I'm concerned. A neighbor works in their HQ and she is the typical liberal asshole.

So do they have good Hot Dogs?

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 06:18 PM (yXCUX)

364
nood

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 06:18 PM (yXCUX)

365 144
also, aromatherapy



Yes it smells wonderful. Cut lawn should be a scent for men.

===

It is. It's called Polo.

Posted by: Corona at November 09, 2017 06:19 PM (OqTGG)

366 >>I had exactly the same thought: football players do not often break ribs (the only exception being the occasional QB who gets pounded by 300 lb. D-linemen). Even then, it's usually a floating rib that gets broken, and shoulder pads only protect the upper part of the rib cage, not the floating ribs or the lowest non-floating ribs.

They don't break them as often these days because most skill players, the guys who get hit in the ribs a lot and particularly QBs, wear flack jackets.

Rib injuries used to be pretty common in football.

Posted by: JackStraw at November 09, 2017 06:19 PM (/tuJf)

367 357 The mechanical engineer part of me wants to do the calculations for a 5'7" tall, 160lb guy running at about 3 MPH towards a few 1" dia pieces of floating bone tenuously attached to a spine just to see how much energy was involved in that attack.

Then I want to be on the jury that sends the progtarded attacker to a Federal PHITA prison for a few years on a terrorism charge.

Physical attacks that could effect a political outcome is the definition of terror. Not having Paul in place to vote as a result of an assault certainly qualifies.
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 09, 2017 06:16 PM (tRaq7)



3 MPH is low; that's very slow jogging speed (20 minute mile), but your point remains: if Boucher broke six ribs on someone just by tackling him, he should be in the NFL.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 09, 2017 06:19 PM (gLfJd)

368 343 In August McConnell's favorable numbers in Kentucky were 18%.

I can't find anything more recent, but 18% is on par with flaming whale shit.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 06:13 PM (4ErVI)
----------------------------
Ah. As bad as Jeff Flake's popularity in AZ.
According to polls.
Polls never once mentioned by Flake or his slobbering MSM apologists when he retired for reasons of "principle."

Posted by: Margarita,voyaging to the edge of crisp at November 09, 2017 06:19 PM (0jtPF)

369 >>355 What's difference between Sen. McConnell and a road kill skunk?

One has a yellow streak down its back, the other a white one?

Posted by: Under Fire at November 09, 2017 06:19 PM (mcI77)

370 363


Costco is anti-2A. They can go have knowledge with themselves as far as I'm concerned. A neighbor works in their HQ and she is the typical liberal asshole.



So do they have good Hot Dogs?

Posted by: Soothsayer -- Fake Commenter at November 09, 2017 06:18 PM (yXCUX)


Hot dogs are all beef and decent. Pizza is pretty good for cheap. I got my boys and I lunch after swimming yesterday for about $6. It's good enough AND cheap.

Posted by: flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner at November 09, 2017 06:19 PM (tbOMB)

371 #356 - Yea but. They are old guys

Posted by: Archer at November 09, 2017 06:19 PM (gbWkA)

372 Enstompening. Noods.

Posted by: SteveOReno at November 09, 2017 06:20 PM (2sCft)

373 Rib injuries used to be pretty common in football.
Posted by: JackStraw at November 09, 2017 06:19 PM (/tuJf)


Yes, but bruised ribs, not usually broken ribs. That's why QBs could continue to play if they wore a flak jacket. If they'd broken the ribs - again, especially the floating ones - I suspect a subsequent injury could be life-threatening, and no quack on earth would let him play like that.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 09, 2017 06:20 PM (gLfJd)

374 371 #356 - Yea but. They are old guys
Posted by: Archer at November 09, 2017 06:19 PM (gbWkA)


Yeah, but what were Boucher's injuries? Nada, right? You'd think a hard tackle that broke ribs would probably break his collar bone too, right?

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 09, 2017 06:22 PM (gLfJd)

375 355 What's difference between Sen. McConnell and a road kill skunk?

Posted by: torabora at November 09, 2017 06:16 PM (6dFYM)

The skunk doesn't have a look on his face like he just shit his pants?

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 09, 2017 06:22 PM (4ErVI)

376 "To break SIX ribs - meaning at least two non-floating ribs - I suspect you'd pretty much have to stomp someone and/or elbow drop him."

Or swing a hard object into them.

Posted by: goodluckduck at November 09, 2017 06:22 PM (yqvys)

377 This guy was a doc, knew anatomy, so serious injury was intentional.

I've read too many versions of this story. I would like to know the truth. How are the facts not out there? Is there not a local paper or news station?

Posted by: professor chaos is glum gumdrop gorilla at November 09, 2017 06:23 PM (hLB6Q)

378 "Sheep will chew it down to the roots,
............

But only if you ask for teeth.

Posted by: Shep at November 09, 2017 06:23 PM (HgMAr)

379 >>Yes, but bruised ribs, not usually broken ribs. That's why QBs could continue to play if they wore a flak jacket. If they'd broken the ribs - again, especially the floating ones - I suspect a subsequent injury could be life-threatening, and no quack on earth would let him play like that.

Ben Rothelisberger, the real one, almost had his career ended by a rib injury that caused a rib to start pressing on an aorta. Hell, it could have killed him. Jordie Nelson was knocked out of the playoffs last January when he took a hit to the ribs against the Giants and had to be carted to the locker room because he couldn't walk with the pain.

I had a few broken ribs playing in college and I was usually the hitter not the hittee. Ribs break pretty easily if you hit somebody right.

Posted by: JackStraw at November 09, 2017 06:24 PM (/tuJf)

380 Physical attacks that could effect a political
outcome is the definition of terror. Not having Paul in place to vote as
a result of an assault certainly qualifies.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 09, 2017 06:16 PM (tRaq7)


I really think this should be updated with the new technology we have. I have scheduled a deposition of a man with not long to live via video. They are sworn in by the court reporter.Same with out of town depositions where parties are in different states. This shit should be a no-brainer.

Posted by: Infidel at November 09, 2017 06:24 PM (4ZKcy)

381 Oh, it's 5 pm. Wonder what I'm making for dinner?

Might be an egg dinner night...
Posted by: Tami at November 09, 2017 06:01 PM (Enq6K)


Shrimp and chorizo with leftover spaghetti garlic and oil. And a big salad and wine.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 09, 2017 06:03 PM (mbhDw)

Chicken Marsala and carmelized Brussels Sprouts. (Doing low carb for gainzzzzz.)

Posted by: SandyCheeks at November 09, 2017 06:24 PM (ihzOe)

382 On my car radio a clip from ABC describing Steve Scalise's return to Congress after "The Republican baseball attack."

So obviously crafted to Serve The Narrative With Plausible Deniability (TM). At a minimum buries the lead of an attempted political assassination of Republicans by an MSNBC -ista, and at worst subliminally imprints that "Republicans attack." But if called on it they can say: "See, we identified that Republicans were attacked, what more do you want?""

Must everything and absolutely everything serve The Narrative? Jesus FC.

Posted by: xnycpeasant at November 09, 2017 06:28 PM (BsGS1)

383
I've read too many versions of this story. I would like to know the truth.

What happened in Las Vegas?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at November 09, 2017 06:28 PM (IqV8l)

384 I had an uncle who had goats on his farm. He kept them most of the time in an enclosure built out of crossties up and down, and horizontal pieces just as heavy. (don't know why it was built so strong, it was old, and it was just there) So my brother and I got in trouble for antagonizing the goats - we'd go in and start hitting the goats on their heads with both hands together - that makes 'em mad, makes want to butt.

So then you just make sure you're standing in front of one of those upright crossties, and when he charges you jump out of the way and WHAM. And the goat wobbles around thinking "damn that dude was a lot harder than I though he was gonna be".

for some reason the adults didn't think that was as funny as we did. They let us know about it.

Posted by: Tom Servo at November 09, 2017 06:29 PM (k1TUh)

385 287
267 A quarrel about lawn care boundaries does not result in 5
fractured ribs! Doctor Knockout meant to do some damage. Since he is up
for a Federal offense, he can go to federal prison with terrorists, drug
lords, and other guys who have done much worse than break some bones.







Posted by: exdem13 at November 09, 2017 06:00 PM (wZznc)



That would be federal "pound me in the ass" prison.
====
Federal prison comes in two kinds,
1. Fenced-in no-frills hotel for white-collar crimes like cleaning out Enron,not filing taxes for 20 years, or hacking the Pentagon.
2. Heavy-duty kennels for bipedal animals who have done more evil in 1 day than King Ahab did in his entire reign.
Guess which one Doctor Knockout is likely going to? Guess which one will involve him getting soap dropped at his feet a lot?

Posted by: exdem13 at November 09, 2017 06:31 PM (wZznc)

386 Right in the dick.

Posted by: President Richard Punch at November 09, 2017 06:37 PM (7+qdf)

387 353
Remember what you were saying about people in the burbs, Art, people
like Skip, people who mow their lawn for the 800th time, and then SNAP?



Guy was probably a big Tom Hanks fan.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVM2WLnIJ3E

Posted by: exdem13 at November 09, 2017 06:37 PM (wZznc)

388 When WHEN will we start fighting back? Not at the ballot box. Not figuratively. Literally, as in, beating the shit out if these people who have inserted violence into politics?

Posted by: Eli Cash at November 09, 2017 06:41 PM (K3M55)

389 Eli Cash

#two weeks.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at November 09, 2017 06:56 PM (hyuyC)

390 Not since Preston Brooks beat the ever living shit out of Charles Sumner or perhaps that congressman who died at Jonestown, have we seen this level of violence visited upon our elected representatives vis--vis Steve Scalise and rand Paul.

Posted by: JB at November 09, 2017 07:02 PM (ch+GK)

391 18 U.S.C. 351(e) makes this a real doozy for the neighbor. It's a federal offense with up to 10 years imprisonment since an injury resulted. No need to prove it was connected to federal job either.

Posted by: Son of Aqua Buddha at November 09, 2017 07:09 PM (Ecphn)

392 Good.

Posted by: Alana at November 09, 2017 07:12 PM (o3d0j)

393 145 Six broken ribs? Unless Paul has osteogenesis imperfecta, that took some work on the part of the attacker.

But, but, was there "intent"? That is the issue.

Posted by: arieswoman at November 09, 2017 07:16 PM (fwWWI)

394 Rule for all lefties-Get off my lawn, and stay off!

Posted by: Cranky Clint Eastwood at November 09, 2017 07:21 PM (zCyNd)

395 Senator loses his mind and attacks his own lawn mower while his caring neighbor tries to rescue him; 6 ribs broken.

The lawn mower has been taken into custody for interrogation.


Posted by: The NY Times at November 09, 2017 08:13 PM (UsCnO)

396 Next to commit suicide with a bullet to the back of the head: John Deere

Posted by: JB at November 09, 2017 08:16 PM (wqja2)

397 Politically motivated? That's what I thought too, until he said yard trimmings. You gotta learn to listen, Lou.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fStW8WtLZwM

Posted by: AndyN at November 10, 2017 01:11 AM (KrJpn)

398 The right are such pussies

Posted by: Trump voters not getting laid much at November 10, 2017 01:53 AM (/hPHx)

399 Donnie 2 scoops is in the picture with Vlad in Vietnam on Drudge. Ear to ear grin.

Posted by: torabora at November 10, 2017 02:17 PM (6dFYM)

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Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat