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The Morning Rant

talking ape.jpg
"You know what bothers me most about this Google memo story is how virtually every single media outlet completely f*ed it up. 'He hates women', one reporter said, or 'The memo claims women are biologically unsuited for computer science'. That's not what the guy wrote. The media coverage is so bad, I can find no evidence that any reporter actually read the memo."

The Babylon Bee always brings teh funny: New Google Technology Autocorrects Users’ Thoughts:

“Let’s say you start thinking there may be some kind of inherent biological difference between men and women,” Google employee Ryan Vo said in a live demo of the new tech. “Immediately, the thought suggestion program in any nearby Google device, app, or service will scrub the idea of inherent gender differences and replace them with the sure knowledge that there are at least three hundred different genders in existence, and always has been.”

Screw The Onion. The Babylon Bee is the best humor site on the web.

Screen shot:

google 1984 slogans.jpg


Marketing:



By Request

Monday:

Lena Dunham...or a nylon stocking full of lard?

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at August 07, 2017 12:34 PM (6t8+a)

Couldn't find the lard, but I did find this:

lena dunham or bag of mashed potatoes.jpg

I was going add the code so you can click on the pic for a larger version, but I don't think anybody wants that.

This was kind of cruel (but I laughed):


This Never Gets Old:

best part of waking up.jpg

Posted by: OregonMuse at 11:17 AM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of page)

1 Hello world.

Posted by: RioBravo at August 09, 2017 11:19 AM (SsblQ)

2 You can always cover mashed potatoes with gravy

Posted by: Roy at August 09, 2017 11:21 AM (7n4KQ)

3 LOL toy Yoda

Posted by: steevy at August 09, 2017 11:22 AM (rmVvL)

4 The Vice article was written by "Sirin" and the Daily Caller one by "Amanda." Goofy names are a SJW tell.

Posted by: josephistan at August 09, 2017 11:23 AM (7HtZB)

5 I read the content, studied the pictures, read the twit chain, so just how far down the list am I?

Posted by: Skandia Recluse at August 09, 2017 11:23 AM (m9X4Y)

6 Yay Gorilla Pundit!

Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at August 09, 2017 11:25 AM (AM1GF)

7 Could someone with photoshop skills put Lena Dunham on one of those Chinese made community owned bicycles for the collective? The ones that Washington, D. C. is going to get, some one said earlier today.

Posted by: Skandia Recluse at August 09, 2017 11:25 AM (m9X4Y)

8 Is that a shadow or does that Lena person have a thigh tattoo on her shoulder?

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 11:25 AM (+fLLK)

9 ".... First!!!..... No!! We do not speak its' name.. it is " You know What... Sheesh..

Posted by: kraken at August 09, 2017 11:25 AM (zSVEm)

10 I...studied the pictures...
Posted by: Skandia Recluse at August 09, 2017 11:23 AM (m9X4Y)
-----------------The Dunham thing is best left unstudied.

Posted by: RioBravo at August 09, 2017 11:25 AM (SsblQ)

11 Toy Yoda.

Snort.

Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 11:25 AM (U76Nz)

12 8 Is that a shadow or does that Lena person have a thigh tattoo on her shoulder?


That is mold.

Posted by: Roy at August 09, 2017 11:26 AM (7n4KQ)

13 The Toy Yoda prank is as bad as the fake scratch off lottery ticket prank. Not funny. just mean.

Posted by: Jack Sock at August 09, 2017 11:26 AM (no/Pv)

14
Remember that song 'She has Betty Davis eyes'?

How about 'She has Lena Dunham thighs.'

Posted by: Skandia Recluse at August 09, 2017 11:26 AM (m9X4Y)

15
While we were all sleeping, the FBI raided Paul Manafort's home.

Mr. President, for the love of all that is good and right, fire that asshole and halt this insanity.

Now.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:26 AM (mbhDw)

16 I remember a similar story about 20 years ago where the "winner " was promised a "Car Phone." What they got was a landline phone in the shape of a car....

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:27 AM (7uYFy)

17

SIOUX CITY, Iowa (AP) — Authorities say a man who tried to deposit what he presented as a $1 million bill has been charged with drug possession in Iowa.

A criminal complaint says Sioux City police officers were called to a Northwest Bank branch Thursday to talk to a man who tried to deposit the bill into his account. The officers asked 33-year-old Dennis Strickland whether he had any more of the bills and that a baggie fell out when he emptied a pocket. The complaint says the baggie contained methamphetamine.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at August 09, 2017 11:27 AM (IqV8l)

18
Wait, that chick in the photo works for Hooters? She doesn't exactly look, er, "qualified," IYKWIM.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:27 AM (mbhDw)

19 Dunham is so... distasteful.. difficult to even think about that.

Posted by: kraken at August 09, 2017 11:27 AM (zSVEm)

20 While we were all sleeping, the FBI raided Paul Manafort's home.



On July 26.

Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 11:28 AM (U76Nz)

21 IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE THE FORMER HOOTER'S EMPLOYEE DOES NOT HAVE ANY HOOTERS.

Posted by: BEN ROETHLISBERGER at August 09, 2017 11:28 AM (mcI77)

22 mmmm...love me some leftover mashed potatoes turned into pancakes..

Posted by: IP at August 09, 2017 11:28 AM (UmSfZ)

23 16 I remember a similar story about 20 years ago where the "winner " was promised a "Car Phone." What they got was a landline phone in the shape of a car....
Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:27 AM (7uYFy)


I give you the Alice Cooper album cover art for "Muscle of Love."

"Wrestle Live Nude Female!!!!"

It was a gorilla.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:29 AM (mbhDw)

24 How about winning a trip to Israel, only to find out you're spending the week at some guy named Izzy's home?

Posted by: josephistan at August 09, 2017 11:29 AM (7HtZB)

25 20 While we were all sleeping, the FBI raided Paul Manafort's home.



On July 26.
Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 11:28 AM (U76Nz)

Yeah.. kind of sleazy clickbait there..

Posted by: kraken at August 09, 2017 11:29 AM (zSVEm)

26 22 mmmm...love me some leftover mashed potatoes turned into pancakes..
Posted by: IP at August 09, 2017 11:28 AM (UmSfZ)


Lena latke.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:29 AM (mbhDw)

27 fuck google with a flaming 6" diameter sewer pipe packed with c4 right in the squeakhole. for eternity.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 11:29 AM (KP5rU)

28 Wait, that chick in the photo works for Hooters? She doesn't exactly look, er, "qualified," IYKWIM.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:27 AM (mbhDw)


Actually, I was noticing the same thing.

( *wink wink* )
( *nudge nudge* )

Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 11:29 AM (+7xUe)

29 She may not have hooters but she was a hell of a beer salesperson. Maybe she was handsie.

Posted by: Jack Sock at August 09, 2017 11:29 AM (no/Pv)

30 The media coverage is so bad, I can find no evidence that any reporter actually read the memo."


I propose a new saying: "You lie like a journalist."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at August 09, 2017 11:29 AM (SRKgf)

31 In that picture, Jordee Berry looks like she is painfully recounting all the flirting she had to do with beer-soaked losers in order to "win" that Toy Yoda. She might even have given out her phone number to more than a few....

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:30 AM (7uYFy)

32 24 How about winning a trip to Israel, only to find out you're spending the week at some guy named Izzy's home?
Posted by: josephistan at August 09, 2017 11:29 AM (7HtZB)



Jamaica! .... Queens.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:30 AM (mbhDw)

33
I give you the Alice Cooper album cover art for "Muscle of Love."

"Wrestle Live Nude Female!!!!"

It was a gorilla.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:29 AM (mbhDw)

Best day of my life!

Posted by: GorillaPundit at August 09, 2017 11:30 AM (7HtZB)

34 Yeah, it's interesting that we have collusion between Lynch and Bill Clinton, clear violations of handling classified information with Hillary and the Paki IT guys, yet the only real investigation we get is a raid on Manafort. He's the only one of those I mentioned that has been handing over documents and cooperating. This is BS and Rosenstein needs to rein Mueller in.

Posted by: notsothoreau at August 09, 2017 11:30 AM (JKNZq)

35 One guy once bought his soon-to-be-ex-wife a Chevelle for Christmas. It was for chevelling snow.

Posted by: Roy at August 09, 2017 11:30 AM (7n4KQ)

36 That "toy Yoda" piece was fascinating. Apparently she won the lawsuit she brought against the company and was able to go buy a $60K+ Land Cruiser with her lottery winnings.

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 11:30 AM (+fLLK)

37 I've seen that Toy Yoda pic before but it never occurred to me that she might be so upset because of HOW she won the beer sales contest.

Posted by: most deplorable Ghost of kari - certified sidebar at August 09, 2017 11:30 AM (nXCp4)

38 fuck google with a flaming 6" diameter sewer pipe packed with c4 right in the squeakhole. for eternity.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 11:29 AM (KP5rU)


Nicely done. lol

Posted by: Berserker- Dragonheads Division at August 09, 2017 11:30 AM (aMlLZ)

39 Lena latke.


and now, in a flash, the food of my childhood has been robbed of me

Posted by: IP at August 09, 2017 11:30 AM (UmSfZ)

40 Well duh. "A Toyota" is a palindrome. "A Toy Yoda" isn't.

Posted by: Duke of Righteous WTF? at August 09, 2017 11:31 AM (T71PA)

41 Authorities say a man who tried to deposit what he presented as a $1
million bill has been charged with drug possession in Iowa.



----------------------------------------

They can seize the million and then get that needed maintenance done on the department MRAP.

(Commenters Note: No, I don't know if the local police department has an MRAP.)

Posted by: RioBravo at August 09, 2017 11:31 AM (SsblQ)

42 what's the Yoda funneh? Hard for me to see.

Posted by: kallisto at August 09, 2017 11:31 AM (g+Dix)

43 She may not have hooters but she was a hell of a beer salesperson. Maybe she was handsie.



Rub & tug for every twelve pack bought!

Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 11:31 AM (U76Nz)

44 FWIW: the founder of Toyota was actually named Toyoda. As I said, FWIW.

Posted by: Northernlurker, Phillips screwdriver of the gods at August 09, 2017 11:32 AM (nBr1j)

45
Manhattan! .... Kansas.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:32 AM (mbhDw)

46 38; thanks. sometimes i get lucky.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 11:32 AM (KP5rU)

47 HHHHMMMM....won cheap toy you did.
Automobile not.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:33 AM (0tfLf)

48
Oh what a feeling.... oh wait a second....

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:33 AM (mbhDw)

49 You want a Lexus

You'll settle for a Toyota

You'll get a toy Yoda

Posted by: josephistan at August 09, 2017 11:33 AM (7HtZB)

50 My wise ass brother bought a car once after promising the guy "Forty- ONE HUNDRED dollar bills. When he went to pick it up and tried to give the guy $4000 in one-hundred dollar bills, the guy insisted on $4100....

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:33 AM (7uYFy)

51 When will a reporter be held accountable for lying?

Posted by: Northernlurker, Phillips screwdriver of the gods at August 09, 2017 11:33 AM (nBr1j)

52 >>31
In that picture, Jordee Berry looks like she is painfully recounting
all the flirting she had to do with beer-soaked losers in order to
"win" that Toy Yoda. She might even have given out her phone number to
more than a few....Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:30 AM (7uYFy)

Jodee: Do not trust the promises that the Hooters assistant night manager will make to you at closing.

Posted by: Zod at August 09, 2017 11:33 AM (Bdeb0)

53 51 When will a reporter be held accountable for lying?
Posted by: Northernlurker, Phillips screwdriver of the gods at August 09, 2017 11:33 AM (nBr1j)


Like Dinesh Deniro?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:34 AM (mbhDw)

54 Apparently she won the lawsuit she brought against the company and was able to go buy a $60K+ Land Cruiser with her lottery winnings.
Posted by: Moron Robbie


-Be Hooters waitress
-Can't get ahead in life.
-Get clowned on by management with 'Toy Yoda' gag.
-Decide enough is enough, you have RIGHTS damnit, and you deserve better than to have your chain yanked by a Hooters manager.
-Win lawsuit worth sixty grand.
-Spend it all on a car.

-Be Hooters waitress.

Posted by: most deplorable Ghost of kari - certified sidebar at August 09, 2017 11:34 AM (nXCp4)

55
Or James O'Keefe and the Planned Parenthood expose producer?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:34 AM (mbhDw)

56 lenas' bicycle has no seat. also it rides on hard, airless tires. you can figure out what she uses for a "seat."

Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 11:34 AM (KP5rU)

57 If they offered her a Corolla would Adam Carolla show up?

Posted by: Jack Sock at August 09, 2017 11:34 AM (no/Pv)

58 Actually, the correct spelling of name of the guy who founded the company was "Toyoda."

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (7uYFy)

59 Knish Dunham.

Posted by: Zod at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (Bdeb0)

60 If she doesn't want the toy Yoda, I'll take it.

Please clap.

Posted by: El Gobernador Jeb Bush at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (PXj2C)

61 Babylon Bee is hilarious. John MacArthur giving a flying elbow drop to Joel Osteen was hysterical.

Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (0mRoj)

62
Levin calls Kerry "mashed potato face."

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (mbhDw)

63 Manhattan! .... Kansas.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton



Free trip for two.
See the City of Lights! Paris!....Texas

Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (U76Nz)

64
54 Apparently she won the lawsuit she brought against the company and was able to go buy a $60K+ Land Cruiser with her lottery winnings.
Posted by: Moron Robbie

-Be Hooters waitress
-Can't get ahead in life.
-Get clowned on by management with 'Toy Yoda' gag.
-Decide enough is enough, you have RIGHTS damnit, and you deserve better than to have your chain yanked by a Hooters manager.
-Win lawsuit worth sixty grand.
-Spend it all on a car.

-Be Hooters waitress.

Posted by: most deplorable Ghost of kari - certified sidebar at August 09, 2017 11:34 AM



ahhh...the circle of life.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (0tfLf)

65 When will a reporter be held accountable for lying?
Posted by: Northernlurker, Phillips screwdriver of the gods at August 09, 2017 11:33 AM (nBr1j)

Accountable? Hell, they'll be given a promotion.

Posted by: Duke of Righteous WTF? at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (T71PA)

66 If she won a Corona, would it have been the Mexican beer?

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:36 AM (7uYFy)

67 Is that brown gravy I see on those mashed potatoes?

Posted by: Under Fire at August 09, 2017 11:36 AM (mcI77)

68 Actually, the correct spelling of name of the guy who founded the company was "Toyoda."


Bosh. I suppose next you'll be telling us that the guy who started Apple was really named Apfel.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at August 09, 2017 11:36 AM (PXj2C)

69 My wise ass brother bought a car once after promising the guy "Forty- ONE HUNDRED dollar bills. When he went to pick it up and tried to give the guy $4000 in one-hundred dollar bills, the guy insisted on $4100....
Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:33 AM (7uYFy)
---------
Please tell me your brother went back with 4100 one-dollar bills.

Posted by: bluebell at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (UoSKV)

70 The whole Google doc is ordinary fucking common sense. Rot the puritans.

Posted by: Alcoholic Asshole Shut In at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (CPk08)

71 The Hooters/Toyota girl truly, honestly believed she was going to get a $20K+ car for one month of selling beer.

Assuming $1 profit on each beer, and an 8 hour shift, and 30 days in the month of April...

That poor, poor girl.

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (+fLLK)

72 Actually, the correct spelling of name of the guy who founded the company was "Toyoda."

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (7uYFy)
------------------
In Japan you save two strokes every time you use Toyota instead. And there was born the Toyota Way of efficiency.

Posted by: RioBravo at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (SsblQ)

73 FWIW: the founder of Toyota was actually named Toyoda. As I said, FWIW.

Yep, and I think they were originally in the loom/weaving business.

As for Google, is there anything out there on How To Use Their Products While Costing Them Money?

Strap their prick CEO prone on the bed of a CNC router, hit his ass with the liquid N2 to freeze it, then carve in "Don't be Evil". I could knock out the g-code for that in about five minutes...

Posted by: JEM at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (TppKb)

74 54 Well,all she wanted was th car...

Posted by: steevy at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (rmVvL)

75 rhat jodee looks like she may be transitioning. maybe a career at fox news?

Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (KP5rU)

76 Actually, the correct spelling of name of the guy who founded the company was "Toyoda."


And the guy who started General Motors wasn't even a lieutenant.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (PXj2C)

77 Posted by: most deplorable Ghost of kari - certified sidebar at August 09, 2017 11:34 AM


ahhh...the circle of life.
Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (0tfLf)

AYAAAAAAAA BAWEMBAAAA
BIDDLYBOOMBIDDLYBA

Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 11:38 AM (0mRoj)

78 So, lately we have seen coined; 'Goolag', 'Googlethink', 'Googlespeak'. Any others?

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 09, 2017 11:38 AM (kusha)

79 75 rhat jodee looks like she may be transitioning. maybe a career at fox news?
Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (KP5rU)


Looks like she's transitioning to Yoda or ET. Freaky looking dame.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:38 AM (mbhDw)

80 Is money won in a lawsuit taxable income?

Posted by: joe, living dangerously at August 09, 2017 11:38 AM (KUaJL)

81 4100 dollar bills,a guy could have a great weekend at a titty bar with that...

Posted by: steevy at August 09, 2017 11:39 AM (rmVvL)

82 The Hooters/Toyota girl truly, honestly believed she was going to get a $20K+ car for one month of selling beer.

Assuming $1 profit on each beer, and an 8 hour shift, and 30 days in the month of April...

That poor, poor girl.
Posted by: Moron Robbie



Was the contest ever in writing or was it all just verbal, word of mouth?
If it was in writing, can she spell?

Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 11:39 AM (U76Nz)

83 69 My wise ass brother bought a car once after promising the guy "Forty- ONE HUNDRED dollar bills. When he went to pick it up and tried to give the guy $4000 in one-hundred dollar bills, the guy insisted on $4100....
Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:33 AM (7uYFy)
---------
Please tell me your brother went back with 4100 one-dollar bills.

Posted by: bluebell at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (UoSKV)

Or 410,000 pennies.

Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 11:39 AM (0mRoj)

84 80 Is money won in a lawsuit taxable income?
Posted by: joe, living dangerously at August 09, 2017 11:38 AM (KUaJL)


"Try us."

- - The IRS

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:39 AM (mbhDw)

85 Strap their prick CEO prone on the bed of a CNC router, hit his ass with the liquid N2 to freeze it, then carve in "Don't be Evil". I could knock out the g-code for that in about five minutes...

Oh, and take back their airport.

Posted by: JEM at August 09, 2017 11:39 AM (TppKb)

86 Hooters got the last laugh though. The Toy Yoda that waitress rejected is one of the rarest Star Wars toys and is going for $66,000 on eBay.....

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:39 AM (7uYFy)

87 77 Posted by: most deplorable Ghost of kari - certified sidebar at August 09, 2017 11:34 AM


ahhh...the circle of life.
Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (0tfLf)

AYAAAAAAAA BAWEMBAAAA
BIDDLYBOOMBIDDLYBA

Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 11:38 AM



Cocks head to side...hears drums in distance...

Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:39 AM (0tfLf)

88 79 75 rhat jodee looks like she may be transitioning. maybe a career at fox news?
Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (KP5rU)


Looks like she's transitioning to Yoda or ET. Freaky looking dame.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:38 AM (mbhDw)

Early Sexbot model... but her eyes... they were dead... like a dolls eyes...

Posted by: kraken at August 09, 2017 11:40 AM (zSVEm)

89 In Japan you save two strokes every time you use Toyota instead. And there was born the Toyota Way of efficiency.
Posted by: RioBravo
-----------

I had no idea that Toyota ever made two strokes. Interesting.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 09, 2017 11:40 AM (kusha)

90 79; kinda like shep. the hr dude at that hooters had to be sight challenged. or, she give a good handy.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 11:41 AM (KP5rU)

91 Early Sexbot model... but her eyes... they were dead... like a dolls eyes...

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0073747/

Posted by: JEM at August 09, 2017 11:41 AM (TppKb)

92 Is money won in a lawsuit taxable income?

It depends on what the judgment is for. A judgment for lost income is taxable as income. A judgment for personal injury is considered reimbursement and is not taxable income.

Since Missy Hooters would have been taxed on winning a Toyota, she'll be taxed on a judgment for fraud based on being cheated out of a Toyota.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at August 09, 2017 11:41 AM (PXj2C)

93
Actually, she sort of looks like Paul Stanley of KISS at about age 13.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:41 AM (mbhDw)

94 what's the Yoda funneh? Hard for me to see.
Posted by: kallisto at August 09, 2017 11:31 AM (g+Dix)


She was promised a "toyota" for winning a contest and got a "toy Yoda".

It's a cruel prank.

Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 11:41 AM (+7xUe)

95 ahhh...the circle of life.
Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:35 AM (0tfLf)

AYAAAAAAAA BAWEMBAAAA
BIDDLYBOOMBIDDLYBA

Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 11:38 AM


Cocks head to side...hears drums in distance...
Posted by: Diogenes



Ahhh weem away! Ahhh weem away!

Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 11:41 AM (U76Nz)

96 I had no idea that Toyota ever made two strokes. Interesting.

The smell of castor oil...

Posted by: JEM at August 09, 2017 11:42 AM (TppKb)

97 I'm not feeling alright today
I'm not feeling that great
I'm not catching on fire today
Love has started to fade
I'm not going to smile today
I'm not gonna laugh
You're out living it up today
I've got dues to pay


I have this song stuck in my head. Thought I'd share.

Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 11:42 AM (0mRoj)

98 79 75 rhat jodee looks like she may be transitioning. maybe a career at fox news?
Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 11:37 AM (KP5rU)

She's wearing the same face my date at the Junior Prom wore all night long....

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:42 AM (7uYFy)

99 If Fully Interactive Sexbot 1.0 looked like this Hooters Toy Yoda girl, face and all, would you spend the cost of a new Camry on it?

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 11:42 AM (+fLLK)

100 Jodee looks perfectly cute to me, she's just upset because
1. She got bamboozled by the promise of a Star Wars action figure and
2. The reporter taking the picture is laughing.

Posted by: most deplorable Ghost of kari - certified sidebar at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (nXCp4)

101 Reporting from Cali: we are not glowing, yet. Fat Kim must be fiddling with the range knobs.

Posted by: IC at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (a0IVu)

102 The smell of castor oil...
Posted by: JEM
----------

Perfume, to me. Ambrosia.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (OdK9v)

103 98
She's wearing the same face my date at the Junior Prom wore all night long....
Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:42 AM (7uYFy)


"You can take your thumb out of my ass any time, Joe."

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (mbhDw)

104 Remember when the FBI raided the Clintons house in the early dawn when it was revealed she had a secret server stashed away with classified information?


Me neither

Posted by: Maritime at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (VDVsF)

105 Saab Sonetts were where it was at.

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (+fLLK)

106 So assless chaps aren't considered to be business attire. The more you know....

Posted by: joncelli, Ray of Freakin' Sunshine at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (RD7QR)

107 Nobody's said it yet, so I will--
I'd hit it....

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (7uYFy)

108 94 what's the Yoda funneh? Hard for me to see.
Posted by: kallisto at August 09, 2017 11:31 AM (g+Dix)

She was promised a "toyota" for winning a contest and got a "toy Yoda".

It's a cruel prank.
Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 11:41 AM (+7xUe)

It's pretty dickish.

Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (0mRoj)

109 Ahhh weem away! Ahhh weem away!

And for anyone who's never read it, go wimoweh to Steyn:

https://www.steynonline.com/6003/the-lion-sleeps-tonight

Posted by: JEM at August 09, 2017 11:44 AM (TppKb)

110 81 4100 dollar bills,a guy could have a great weekend at a titty bar with that...
Posted by: steevy at August 09, 2017 11:39 AM (rmVvL)

Make it precipitate up in here!!

Posted by: Jack Sock at August 09, 2017 11:44 AM (no/Pv)

111 101 Reporting from Cali: we are not glowing, yet. Fat Kim must be fiddling with the range knobs.
Posted by: IC at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (a0IVu)


"Ooh! Rooky! Ladal Lange flom Amana!"

- - Phat Phuck

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:44 AM (mbhDw)

112 Gorilla: "hey I feel for that waitress. I got all excited about 'Bananarama' until some joker told me it was just a couple English bints. Not my concept of bananarama!!!"

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at August 09, 2017 11:44 AM (dueIV)

113 She was promised a "toyota" for winning a contest and got a "toy Yoda".

It's a cruel prank.
Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 11:41 AM (+7xUe)

It's pretty dickish.
Posted by: Insomniac



Only works if the whole joke is verbal only.

Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 11:45 AM (U76Nz)

114 I wonder if Toy Yoda girl sold $4100 worth of beer?

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 11:45 AM (+fLLK)

115 "You can take your thumb out of my ass any time, Joe."

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (mbhDw)

She was gorgeous though. She was the sister of my friend's girlfriend and had just broken up with her boyfriend. I needed a date, and well....

We became good friends later on...

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:45 AM (7uYFy)

116 113 Only works if the whole joke is verbal only.
Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 11:45 AM (U76Nz)

And if everyone else in the restaurant was in on it.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (mbhDw)

117 111 101 Reporting from Cali: we are not glowing, yet. Fat Kim must be fiddling with the range knobs.
Posted by: IC at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (a0IVu)


"Ooh! Rooky! Ladal Lange flom Amana!"

- - Phat Phuck

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:44 AM



I'm thinking a short round hitting Seattle would finally fix the fuvking traffic around here.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (0tfLf)

118 the fbi is a world wide fucking embarrassment. bought off suckers of cock. as bad as the irs.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (KP5rU)

119 Oh, Hello GorillaPundit...

I know at least three people, including the wife, who have a toy Yoda in their Toyota.

I feel bad for the Hooters girl. I'd console her but I'm short on one dollar bills.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (3OIiX)

120 "Ooh! Rooky! Ladal Lange flom Amana!"

- - Phat Phuck
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:44 AM (mbhDw)


That lacist.

Posted by: Alcoholic Asshole Shut In at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (CPk08)

121 Saab Sonetts were where it was at.
Posted by: Moron Robbie
---------

There's nothing like the ring-ding and puff of smoke from a column-shifted two-stroke to stir the blood of a car guy.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (OdK9v)

122 It depends on what the judgment is for. A judgment for lost income is taxable as income. A judgment for personal injury is considered reimbursement and is not taxable income.

Since Missy Hooters would have been taxed on winning a Toyota, she'll be taxed on a judgment for fraud based on being cheated out of a Toyota.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at August 09, 2017 11:41 AM (PXj2C)

That makes sense. Thanks.

Posted by: joe, living dangerously at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (KUaJL)

123 I wonder if Toy Yoda girl sold $4100 worth of beer?
Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 11:45 AM (+fLLK)

She sold forty-one hundred dollar bottles of beer....

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:47 AM (7uYFy)

124 105 Saab Sonetts were where it was at.
Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 11:43 AM (+fLLK)

Instead of a car, you win a poem about fighter jets.

Posted by: josephistan at August 09, 2017 11:47 AM (7HtZB)

125 117
I'm thinking a short round hitting Seattle would finally fix the fuvking traffic around here.
Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (0tfLf)


Fight for 15.... roentgens.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:47 AM (mbhDw)

126
I'm thinking a short round hitting Seattle would finally fix the fuvking traffic around here.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (0tfLf)


You ain't seen nothing yet.

Posted by: SDOT at August 09, 2017 11:48 AM (mcI77)

127 124
Instead of a car, you win a poem about fighter jets.
Posted by: josephistan at August 09, 2017 11:47 AM (7HtZB)


I wandered lonely as a FW-190....

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:48 AM (mbhDw)

128 >>It's a cruel prank.

So is Hooters.

Posted by: JackStraw at August 09, 2017 11:48 AM (/tuJf)

129 How would you feel if you scratched off a winning lottery ticket for 50,000 and went through you're celebration dance in front of your family and friends only to be told it was a prank?

Posted by: Jack Sock at August 09, 2017 11:49 AM (no/Pv)

130 did someone mention Toyotas?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYvt4I52wgQ

Posted by: redc1c4 at August 09, 2017 11:49 AM (Ro2Dk)

131 Instead of a car, you win a poem about fighter jets.
Posted by: josephistan at August 09, 2017 11:47 AM (7HtZB)


I wandered lonely as a FW-190....
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:48 AM (mbhDw)

LOL

Nice

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at August 09, 2017 11:49 AM (3OIiX)

132 128 >>It's a cruel prank.

So is Hooters.
Posted by: JackStraw at August 09, 2017 11:48 AM (/tuJf)


True. I mean, honestly, if people really expect to get some kepi with a basket of wings and curly fries....

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:49 AM (mbhDw)

133 105 Saab Sonetts were where it was at.

The Saab Sonett car had a V4 engine.

Posted by: Under Fire at August 09, 2017 11:49 AM (mcI77)

134
Hooters got the last laugh though. The Toy Yoda that waitress rejected is one of the rarest Star Wars toys and is going for $66,000 on eBay.....
Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:39 AM


But has it gone for $66,000?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at August 09, 2017 11:49 AM (IqV8l)

135 the fbi is an agenda driven organization. a political and enforcement tool of the democratic party.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 11:50 AM (KP5rU)

136 73 FWIW: the founder of Toyota was actually named Toyoda. As I said, FWIW.

Yep, and I think they were originally in the loom/weaving business.

As for Google, is there anything out there on How To Use Their Products While Costing Them Money?

Strap their prick CEO prone on the bed of a CNC router, hit his ass with the liquid N2 to freeze it, then carve in "Don't be Evil". I could knock out the g-code for that in about five minutes...
Posted by: JEM


1. Make new google account
2. Find a large file
3. Encrypt with absurdly long key
4. Upload to google drive
5. If not at 15 GB free storage limit, goto Step 1

Step 3 is needed, as Google uses a "single instance storage" scheme, meaning additional copies of something do not consume additional space. THe encryption makes sure what you upload looks different to google

Posted by: Iron Mike Golf at August 09, 2017 11:50 AM (di1hb)

137 125 117
I'm thinking a short round hitting Seattle would finally fix the fuvking traffic around here.
Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (0tfLf)


Fight for 15.... roentgens.


Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:47 AM



Damnit! I just cleaned this keyboard!!!

Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:50 AM (0tfLf)

138 I'm thinking a short round hitting Seattle would finally fix the fuvking traffic around here.
Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (0tfLf)


If the wife didn't work downtown, I'd cheer it on.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at August 09, 2017 11:50 AM (3OIiX)

139 >>It's a cruel prank.

So is Hooters.
Posted by: JackStraw at August 09, 2017 11:48 AM (/tuJf)

Trainer to flirt to increase beer sales.
I have no problem if a bar maid or waitress comes to that conclusion on her own...but to train waitresses for that, it's unseemly....

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:50 AM (7uYFy)

140 How would you feel if you scratched off a winning lottery ticket for 50,000 and went through you're celebration dance in front of your family and friends only to be told it was a prank?

Posted by: Jack Sock
---------

Dammit! How the hell did you hear about that?

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 09, 2017 11:51 AM (OdK9v)

141 I...studied the pictures...
Posted by: Skandia Recluse at August 09, 2017 11:23 AM (m9X4Y)
-----------------The Dunham thing is best left unstudied.

Posted by: RioBravo at August 09, 2017 11:25 AM (SsblQ)

Dunwich Horror>>Dunham Horror.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 09, 2017 11:51 AM (iPbwM)

142 There seemed to be a disturbance in the force.

Posted by: RioBravo at August 09, 2017 11:51 AM (SsblQ)

143 "Ooh! Rooky! Ladal Lange flom Amana!"

- - Phat Phuck


Good thing I gave up the diet pepsi in the morning.

Posted by: JEM at August 09, 2017 11:52 AM (TppKb)

144 She was gorgeous though. She was the sister of my friend's girlfriend and had just broken up with her boyfriend. I needed a date, and well....

We became good friends later on...

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:45 AM (7uYFy)


That's exactly how I met the wife. The sister of my friend's girlfriend, and she had just broken up with her boyfriend, and I had tossed the bitch on wheels I was dating. Neither of us were looking, but my friend and her sister pushed us together. A semi blind date really.

Posted by: Berserker- Dragonheads Division at August 09, 2017 11:52 AM (aMlLZ)

145 117

I'm thinking a short round hitting Seattle would finally fix the fuvking traffic around here.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (0tfLf)


I hear ya; when I get stuck on the 101 or 405 in LA, I tend to pray for a quick death.

Posted by: IC at August 09, 2017 11:52 AM (a0IVu)

146 I practical jokes like that are shitty. The worst is when parents do it to their kids and upload video of them sobbing to YouTube.

Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 11:52 AM (0mRoj)

147 138 I'm thinking a short round hitting Seattle would finally fix the fuvking traffic around here.
Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:46 AM (0tfLf)


If the wife didn't work downtown, I'd cheer it on.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at August 09, 2017 11:50 AM



OK...Renton works too.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 11:53 AM (0tfLf)

148 True. I mean, honestly, if people really expect to get some kepi with a basket of wings and curly fries....
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 11:49 AM (mbhDw)

I agree. And yet...it happens. I know three guys who dated strippers--they were customers first--- and two got married to them. One is still married --they have three kids--and she is the the president of the PTA in their kids school district.

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:53 AM (7uYFy)

149 I *think* practical jokes like that are shitty. What is wrong with me today?

Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 11:53 AM (0mRoj)

150 Damnit! I just cleaned this keyboard!!!

Yeah, JJ's hell on the bubble-contacts today.

Posted by: JEM at August 09, 2017 11:53 AM (TppKb)

151 It's a cruel prank.

So is Hooters.
Posted by: JackStraw at August 09, 2017 11:48 AM (/tuJf)

Trainer to flirt to increase beer sales.
I have no problem if a bar maid or waitress comes to that conclusion on her own...but to train waitresses for that, it's unseemly....
Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:50 AM (7uYFy)

Eh. You know what you're getting into at Hooters. It's just food and scenery. Hell, I like it when cute girls flirt with me. Being nice to your customers is a winning formula.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at August 09, 2017 11:54 AM (3OIiX)

152 108. I don't care if it IS fake or, if real, a phoney baloney lawsuit.

That's some good shit, right there.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine. All Honor & Glory to Kekistan! at August 09, 2017 11:54 AM (fA1SL)

153 94 . Thanks OM. She does look rather crestfallen. I hope she got a Kinkade painting consolation prize.

Posted by: kallisto at August 09, 2017 11:55 AM (g+Dix)

154 if people really expect to get some kepi with a basket of wings and curly fries....
----------------------------------------------

Why would anyone expect a hat on wings and fries?

Posted by: RioBravo at August 09, 2017 11:55 AM (SsblQ)

155 37.4220° N, 122.0841° W

All Baby Kim needs to know.

Posted by: JEM at August 09, 2017 11:55 AM (TppKb)

156 If Fully Interactive Sexbot 1.0 looked like this Hooters Toy Yoda girl, face and all, would you spend the cost of a new Camry on it?

If I could have a fully interactive sexbot, I wouldn't give a fuck if it looked like Lena Dunham.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at August 09, 2017 11:55 AM (X6fMO)

157 148. She live in Harper Valley, by any chance?

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine. All Honor & Glory to Kekistan! at August 09, 2017 11:56 AM (fA1SL)

158 That's exactly how I met the wife. The sister of my friend's girlfriend, and she had just broken up with her boyfriend, and I had tossed the bitch on wheels I was dating. Neither of us were looking, but my friend and her sister pushed us together. A semi blind date really.
Posted by: Berserker- Dragonheads Division at August 09, 2017 11:52 AM (aMlLZ)

It would have been nice, but in my case, she was still-stuck on the loser who dumped her, and she was unwilling--or I was unable to convince her otherwise. What I knew about women in 1979 was essentially nothing.
She still looks good---but she has had a really rough life.

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 11:57 AM (7uYFy)

159 I wouldn't give a fuck if it looked like Lena Dunham.

I wouldn't either, mainly because I could never get it up for that.

But just think about the opportunities for fully customizable sexbots? You want Godzilla with a flashing red pinball-game bunghole? Okay, 20% upcharge, but you're on.

Posted by: JEM at August 09, 2017 11:58 AM (TppKb)

160 129 How would you feel if you scratched off a winning lottery ticket for 50,000 and went through you're celebration dance in front of your family and friends only to be told it was a prank?

Posted by: Jack Sock at August 09, 2017 11:49 AM (no/Pv)


I heard a story some years ago about a guy who won the lottery prize of $10 million (or whatever it was, big enough to retire on), went down to his place of employment, mooned his boss, said "fuck you" to upper management, and waltzed out.

So he went down to the lottery office, handed in his ticket, and was handed $80. What, no, where's my $10 million, he shrieked? Clerk pointed out he only matched 5, not 6.

( *sad trombone* )

Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 11:58 AM (+7xUe)

161 She live in Harper Valley, by any chance?



Does she look like Barbara Eden?

Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 11:58 AM (U76Nz)

162 FBN has Col. David Hunt (Ret.) on. Haven't seen him on any Fox channel in ages.


Doesn't sound like he's a fan of a NK strike.....

Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 11:59 AM (Enq6K)

163 Yoda.

I remember a timeshare giveaway. One of the smallest prizes was a Winnebago.

What it was was a sleeping bag with Winne-BAG-o on it.

Posted by: Bruce at August 09, 2017 11:59 AM (8ikIW)

164 >>The media coverage is so bad, I can find no evidence that any reporter actually read the memo.



Nah, some of them read it and realized they really needed to kill the conversation because it messed with the narrative.

Stefan Molyneux interviewed him:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TN1vEfqHGro

Posted by: Lizzy at August 09, 2017 11:59 AM (NOIQH)

165 162 FBN has Col. David Hunt (Ret.) on. Haven't seen him on any Fox channel in ages.

Doesn't sound like he's a fan of a NK strike.....
Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 11:59 AM (Enq6K)


Nor am I. But that doesn't mean it doesn't need to happen.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:00 PM (mbhDw)

166 I heard a story some years ago about a guy who won the lottery prize of $10 million (or whatever it was, big enough to retire on), went down to his place of employment, mooned his boss, said "fuck you" to upper management, and waltzed out.

So he went down to the lottery office, handed in his ticket, and was handed $80. What, no, where's my $10 million, he shrieked? Clerk pointed out he only matched 5, not 6.

( *sad trombone* )

*
*
Believe me, I'd check that six ways from Sunday, and wait until I had the first installment in hand, before I burned my bridges like that. But having that kind of mind means I don't play the lottery -- which has been called "a tax on dumb people."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at August 09, 2017 12:00 PM (PoXBp)

167 It's a cruel prank.

So is Hooters.
Posted by: JackStraw


True. I mean, honestly, if people really expect to get some kepi with a basket of wings and curly fries....

Posted by: J.J. Sefton


Food isn't even that great. And when we had a location here, the ladies weren't all that. I rate one push-up bra out of five.

Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at August 09, 2017 12:00 PM (AM1GF)

168 163 Yoda.

I remember a timeshare giveaway. One of the smallest prizes was a Winnebago.

What it was was a sleeping bag with Winne-BAG-o on it.
Posted by: Bruce at August 09, 2017 11:59 AM (8ikIW)


I thought they were going to give you a bagel with lox and cream cheese as a prize.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:01 PM (mbhDw)

169 She live in Harper Valley, by any chance?



Does she look like Barbara Eden?
Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 11:58 AM (U76Nz)

No, but --and I'm being TOTALLY honest--the sister looked like Barbara Eden. My date looked like a cross between a young Florence Henderson and Michelle Pfeiffer...

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 12:01 PM (7uYFy)

170 This will wake you up - watch to the end.

https://twitter.com/OnlineMagazin/status/893775582445674496

***If you don't like spiders do not watch***

Posted by: Lizzy at August 09, 2017 12:01 PM (NOIQH)

171 161 She live in Harper Valley, by any chance?


Does she look like Barbara Eden?
Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017

*
*
Mr. Harper stayed too long at Kelly's Bar again . . .

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at August 09, 2017 12:01 PM (PoXBp)

172 I thought they were going to give you a bagel with lox and cream cheese as a prize.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton

That I would have signed up for.

Posted by: Bruce at August 09, 2017 12:01 PM (8ikIW)

173 Believe me, I'd check that six ways from Sunday, and wait until I had the first installment in hand, before I burned my bridges like that. But having that kind of mind means I don't play the lottery -- which has been called "a tax on dumb people."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius


I pick up a ticket when I'm in Georgia, which is maybe two or three times a year at most anymore. Never expect to win, though it would be a lovely surprise in a life increasingly dominated by unpleasant developments.

Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at August 09, 2017 12:02 PM (AM1GF)

174 149 I *think* practical jokes like that are shitty.
Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 11:53 AM (0mRoj)


I actually do, too, and the owners are certainly dickheads, but something about winning a "toy Yoda" made me giggle.

Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 12:02 PM (+7xUe)

175 Ok, staff, listen up. I've posted the new schedule, it's in the break room. Make sure you have coverage if you can't make it to work on any given day you are scheduled. It is YOUR responsibility to find a replacement for your shift!

Otherwise of note, we have Employee of the Month honors on the line. You girls are really putting forth the effort this month. In the running right now, Tiffany is in the lead, Amber is second, Britney is third. There's a whole bunch of you between four and 12, but keep up the good work! There's still plenty of time for you to catch up and win this thing.

Except for you, Scowly McFlatchest. I'm sorry, I mean Ms. Berry. I'm afraid you are out of the running.

Posted by: Hooters Manager at August 09, 2017 12:02 PM (TOk1P)

176 Nor am I. But that doesn't mean it doesn't need to happen.





Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:00 PM (mbhDw)

He was talking "millions of civilian casualties" and "our missile defense system is 50% accurate at best."
He was a Debbie downer.

Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 12:04 PM (Enq6K)

177
The best part of waking up... is waking up.

Posted by: Phat Boi With Nuke ICBM at August 09, 2017 12:04 PM (EgwCt)

178 DEMOCRATS GOP Punish 6.5 Million Middle Class and Working Americans with Obamacare Fine
-GP

Posted by: Under Fire at August 09, 2017 12:05 PM (mcI77)

179 Fucking Mets have an afternoon game and I can't listen to Rush....what's he saying?

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 12:05 PM (7uYFy)

180 Is Gorilla Pundit related to Johnny ColdCuts?

Posted by: Kreplach at August 09, 2017 12:06 PM (9A6UB)

181 176 He was talking "millions of civilian casualties" and "our missile defense system is 50% accurate at best."
He was a Debbie downer.
Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 12:04 PM (Enq6K)


"I'm not saying we won't get our hair mussed...."

- - Buck Turgidson

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:06 PM (mbhDw)

182 Food isn't even that great. And when we had a location here, the ladies weren't all that. I rate one push-up bra out of five.

Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at August 09, 2017 12:00 PM (AM1GF)


Hooters shares the same mentality, to me, as a strip club. There's no point in going, since you're not going to get lucky, you're throwing your money down a rat hole and you'll come out just as or even more depressed than you were when you went in. You might as well stay home cruising for porn, except that's a depressing activity as well.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at August 09, 2017 12:06 PM (X6fMO)

183 169. So begins the Hotties We've Dated thread.

Posted by: kallisto at August 09, 2017 12:06 PM (g+Dix)

184 It's a year into this Russian Hoax and the FBI is just getting around to searching Manafort's home?

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 12:06 PM (7uYFy)

185 The quality of food and trim at Hooters does vary a lot.

It used to be a way to make mega tip money for the girls, many of whom were/are dancers or the like. This way they get to keep their clothes on.

Dated one, briefly. Stunny, busty and blonde but it didn't go anywhere. Hell, I didn't know what I was doing with women at the time anyway, so probably my fault for not having game.

Still like eating there, though. Good chicken sandwiches. I like the burgers with baked beans too.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at August 09, 2017 12:06 PM (3OIiX)

186 I vaguely recall one of my brothers typing up a letter and mailing it indicating my other brother had won a car or somesuch, as he'd made a big production about some essay contest or something. It worked. "I won!"

An early Sony desktop owned had a text to speech application, I used that to spoof a roommate with an early Saturday morning phone call from the nonexistant "United States Army Automated Information System"; prompting him to press in his social security # on the phonepad, etc etc had him going for quite a while.

Posted by: Common Tater at August 09, 2017 12:06 PM (EVPPG)

187 I *think* practical jokes like that are shitty.
Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 11:53 AM (0mRoj)

I actually do, too, and the owners are certainly dickheads, but something about winning a "toy Yoda" made me giggle.
Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 12:02 PM (+7xUe)


Yeah, I'm sorry, but anyone on this planet between 1977 and now should know what "toy yoda" means. If somebody says they're going to give you a toy yoda, there should be no doubt.

If it's not a law on the books, it should be.

Right in the statues next to the Mike Hunt law.

Posted by: BurtTC at August 09, 2017 12:07 PM (TOk1P)

188 179 Fucking Mets have an afternoon game and I can't listen to Rush....what's he saying?
Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 12:05 PM (7uYFy)


Dude. Listen on line. Started off talking about the Manafort raid.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:07 PM (mbhDw)

189
The Saab Sonett car had a V4 engine.

Posted by: Under Fire at August 09, 2017 11:49 AM (mcI77)

---

Two stroke 3 cylinder.

Lawn. Off it.

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 12:07 PM (psH+N)

190 Although I'll concede that the V4 came later.

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 12:07 PM (psH+N)

191 the hooters here lasted about a year. they couldn't nuke the chicken grease off the walls. tore it down. it's a tire and oil change place now.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 12:08 PM (KP5rU)

192 Hooters shares the same mentality, to me, as a strip club. There's no point in going, since you're not going to get lucky, you're throwing your money down a rat hole and you'll come out just as or even more depressed than you were when you went in. You might as well stay home cruising for porn, except that's a depressing activity as well.
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at August 09, 2017 12:06 PM (X6fMO)


Biggest difference is, some strip clubs it's possible they actually serve decent food.

Posted by: BurtTC at August 09, 2017 12:08 PM (TOk1P)

193 With my luck, my multi-million dollar lottery prize would be followed by a complete currency collapse leaving my large account balances worthless. But at least I would comparatively better off with more worthless than most.

Posted by: RioBravo at August 09, 2017 12:08 PM (SsblQ)

194 As for Google, is there anything out there on How To Use Their Products While Costing Them Money?

Strap their prick CEO prone on the bed of a CNC router, hit his ass with the liquid N2 to freeze it, then carve in "Don't be Evil". I could knock out the g-code for that in about five minutes...
Posted by: JEM

_________

Don't pay for advertising through them and use an adblocker like "Ublock".

The previous, widely used adblocker (can't remember name)was supposedly bought out by them by some shell company and now it lets a lot of ads slip through

Posted by: Maritime at August 09, 2017 12:09 PM (VDVsF)

195 Why wasn't the FBI raid a news item the next day?

Oh well it's two weeks ago I guess there's no point in getting angry about it? Fuck that.

This isn't going to be the Wisconsin. It must not.

Posted by: BourbonChicken at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (rnAwa)

196 180 Is Gorilla Pundit related to Johnny ColdCuts?
Posted by: Kreplach at August 09, 2017 12:06 PM (9A6UB)


Johnny Coldcuts? I crap bigger'n he does.

--GorillaPundit

Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (+7xUe)

197 Dude. Listen on line. Started off talking about the Manafort raid.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:07 PM (mbhDw)

The computer I'm using at work has a shitty sound card and I'm hard of hearing anyway---so it's basically no use.

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (7uYFy)

198
159 I wouldn't give a fuck if it looked like Lena Dunham.

I wouldn't either, mainly because I could never get it up for that.

But just think about the opportunities for fully customizable sexbots? You want Godzilla with a flashing red pinball-game bunghole? Okay, 20% upcharge, but you're on.

Posted by: JEM at August 09, 2017 11:58 AM (TppKb)








I think I saw that listing on AliExpress last weekend.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (veoSD)

199 The media coverage is so bad, I can find no evidence that any reporter actually read the memo."




And have the facts get in the way of the agenda? That's crazy talk

Posted by: TheQuietMan at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (493sH)

200 Gorilla: "hey, there are gorillas with weird nips too. The difference is we kill those baloney-nippled freaks when they're young. That's why all you see in zoos and nature docs are sweet perky gorilla nips."

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (dueIV)

201 Biggest difference is, some strip clubs it's possible they actually serve decent food.
Posted by: BurtTC



If there's 3 or 4 clubs close to each other, the 5 pm "all you can eat" buffet wars get serious. They have to to draw people in.

Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (U76Nz)

202 FBN is reporting that Disney will pull it's content from Netflix and start it's own streaming service.

Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (Enq6K)

203
If it's not a law on the books, it should be.

Right in the statues next to the Mike Hunt law.
Posted by: BurtTC at August 09, 2017

*
*
Tell me about it.

Posted by: Lloyd Bridges of "Sea Hunt" at August 09, 2017 12:11 PM (PoXBp)

204 Once the fembot can cook and clean and do the basic 101 positions? I'm cashing in my 401K and getting one.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at August 09, 2017 12:11 PM (3OIiX)

205 If the Manafort raid was two weeks ago and nothing has leaked about it thus far, what incriminating evidence could they have found?

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 12:11 PM (7uYFy)

206 Ad nausem browser plug in clicks EVERY link on a page. Makes your personal interests worthless and meaningless, and neuters Google selling your info. Google even banned it from their browser apparently.

Thanks shibumi for mentioning it iirc.

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (psH+N)

207 I'm getting sick and tired of listening to all these pearl clutchers talking about Trump's response to Kim. This little dwarf has been threatening us and our allies repeatedly with nuclear attack and people are criticizing Trump for telling them we will respond with fire and fury?

Maybe if Obama or Bush and especially Clinton had actually done something to stop this freak years ago we wouldn't be in this position, you bedwetting babies.

Posted by: JackStraw at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (/tuJf)

208 I don't play the lottery -- which has been called "a tax on dumb people."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at August 09, 2017 12:00 PM (PoXBp)


To be fair, you're only dumb if you buy lots of tickets thinking that will substantially improve your chances of winning. Statistically, the first ticket you buy increases your odds of winning from precisely zero to something greater than zero; buying more does not yield the same incremental benefit, percentage-wise. And one ticket, even per week, is actually a pretty cheap and harmless form of entertainment.

Posted by: HTL at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (0l8E+)

209 Ad nausem PLUG IN, not browser. Sorry.

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (psH+N)

210 202 FBN is reporting that Disney will pull it's content from Netflix and start it's own streaming service.
Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (Enq6K)

Well, fuck them in the Mickey Mouse ear. I won't be subscribing to it.

Posted by: Insomniac at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (0mRoj)

211 197 Dude. Listen on line. Started off talking about the Manafort raid.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:07 PM (mbhDw)

The computer I'm using at work has a shitty sound card and I'm hard of hearing anyway---so it's basically no use.
Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (7uYFy)


Listen to the recap on YouTube. Look up the channel for "Tish Dixon." Somehow, she's able to post the shows commercial free.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (mbhDw)

212 FBN is reporting that Disney will pull it's content from Netflix and start it's own streaming service.

Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (Enq6K)



Yup they're going to do the same for ESPN. Not that anyone will care about that

Posted by: TheQuietMan at August 09, 2017 12:13 PM (493sH)

213 205 If the Manafort raid was two weeks ago and nothing has leaked about it thus far, what incriminating evidence could they have found?
Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 12:11 PM (7uYFy)


They're looking for anything that can be used as a process crime like they did to Martha Stewart and Scooter Libby.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:13 PM (mbhDw)

214 As for Google, is there anything out there on How To Use Their Products While Costing Them Money?

---

There's this handy little program, recommended by 4chan:

https://adnauseam.io/

Posted by: shibumi at August 09, 2017 12:13 PM (aT+Bx)

215 202: that's great news. fuck disney. evil personified.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at August 09, 2017 12:13 PM (KP5rU)

216 And one ticket, even per week, is actually a pretty cheap and harmless form of entertainment.



And it's voluntary. Unlike another school tax.

Posted by: rickb223 at August 09, 2017 12:13 PM (U76Nz)

217 bleah. I'm no gym bunny, but I'm a bigger right wing asshole tban anyone here. I can't post half the shit that occurs to me because I'd get banned.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at August 09, 2017 12:14 PM (RMoQQ)

218 LOL. I didn't notice that ad naseum was noted ealier.

/yeah, I should read more..

Posted by: shibumi at August 09, 2017 12:14 PM (aT+Bx)

219 They probably found nothing,so they leaked that the raid happen to generate chatter.

Posted by: steevy at August 09, 2017 12:14 PM (rmVvL)

220 FBN is reporting that Disney will pull it's content from Netflix and start it's own streaming service.
Posted by: Tami

_________


I see Netflix stock crashing in the coming years, but I've been wrong before.

They have a huge amount of subscribers but they continually are bleeding money. Something like $20 billion in debt.

At some point when lots of similar services start rolling out, investors are going to want to see a plan to make money and not just look at the innovation of the business.

Posted by: Maritime at August 09, 2017 12:14 PM (VDVsF)

221 Not a coffee drinker, but could not agree more that Hilary is the President is a thought that can lighten a bad mood over other news at any time.

Posted by: RM at August 09, 2017 12:14 PM (U3LtS)

222 207 I'm getting sick and tired of listening to all these pearl clutchers talking about Trump's response to Kim. This little dwarf has been threatening us and our allies repeatedly with nuclear attack and people are criticizing Trump for telling them we will respond with fire and fury?

Maybe if Obama or Bush and especially Clinton had actually done something to stop this freak years ago we wouldn't be in this position, you bedwetting babies.
Posted by: JackStraw at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (/tuJf)


Check out my link to Allen West's response from this morning.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:15 PM (mbhDw)

223 And one ticket, even per week, is actually a pretty cheap and harmless form of entertainment.
Posted by: HTL at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (0l8E+)


Eons ago, I had a thing for a gal who worked at a local convenience store. So I would go in there as many days as I could, but a soda or coffee, and grab a scratch-off ticket from her.

Called her my good luck charm, or some other such nonsense.

Yeah... I didn't get lucky, either way.

Posted by: BurtTC at August 09, 2017 12:15 PM (TOk1P)

224 FBN is reporting that Disney will pull it's content from Netflix and start it's own streaming service.

Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (Enq6K)


Good luck with that. I've been streaming for about three years and saw ONE Disney movie in that time. 'Invincible' -- a story about a Philadelphia native that tried out and won a position on the Eagles.

They're not getting a dime from me.

Posted by: Slippery Slope Salesman at August 09, 2017 12:15 PM (EgwCt)

225 I'm getting sick and tired of listening to all these pearl clutchers talking about Trump's response to Kim. This little dwarf has been threatening us and our allies repeatedly with nuclear attack and people are criticizing Trump for telling them we will respond with fire and fury?

Maybe if Obama or Bush and especially Clinton had actually done something to stop this freak years ago we wouldn't be in this position, you bedwetting babies.
Posted by: JackStraw at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (/tuJf)

It basically comes down to ignorance of the actual facts about what has been going on and pure unadulterated Trump hatred. We laugh, but the lefties who actually think Trump and Kim are both unhinged losers with bad haircuts and small penises are not taunting us. THEY BELIEVE IT.

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 12:15 PM (7uYFy)

226 Yup they're going to do the same for ESPN. Not that anyone will care about that

Posted by: TheQuietMan at August 09, 2017 12:13 PM (493sH)

Yeah, I left that out of my post because don't give a....

Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 12:15 PM (Enq6K)

227 Maybe if Obama or Bush and especially Clinton had
actually done something to stop this freak years ago we wouldn't be in
this position, you bedwetting babies.

Posted by: JackStraw at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (/tuJf)
------------------------------------------
Clinton and Bush would have been stopping the other Fat Kim freak. il contra con un.

Posted by: RioBravo at August 09, 2017 12:15 PM (SsblQ)

228 The whole reason I was against this recusal was they have to come back with somebody's scalp. Like they did with Libby.

I will say this, I think Manafort is probably dirty which is why Trump got rid of his ASAP when these conflicts of interest came to light. Guy was his campaign manager like a week.

Posted by: Maritime at August 09, 2017 12:16 PM (VDVsF)

229 Maybe if Obama or Bush and especially Clinton had actually done something to stop this freak years ago we wouldn't be in this position, you bedwetting babies.
Posted by: JackStraw at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (/tuJf)


Don't blame Clinton, he did something. Gave the Norks four billion dollars.

Posted by: Slippery Slope Salesman at August 09, 2017 12:16 PM (EgwCt)

230
Oh my...Madison Gesiotto is on Fox Business.

Posted by: TheQuietMan at August 09, 2017 12:17 PM (493sH)

231 The Norks......

Say it with me: 'General MacArthur did nothing wrong.'

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine. All Honor & Glory to Kekistan! at August 09, 2017 12:17 PM (fA1SL)

232
My dad loved playing Lotto and when it was just 5 numbers without the Mega number, picked 4 out of the 5 and missed winning $7 million by picking 27 instead of 28.

He was thrilled that he won that and in fact let me and my brother split the winnings.

Miss that guy terribly.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:17 PM (mbhDw)

233 >>Clinton and Bush would have been stopping the other Fat Kim freak. il contra con un.

They also would have been stopping his father before his son got nukes.

Bubba actually bragged that his team of negotiators, including the worthless social worker turned international weapons negotiator (not kidding) Wendy Sherman, the same scrunt who was on the Iran nuke negotiating team, prevented North Korea from getting nukes.

Our betters would rather politicians lie to them than stand up for America.

Posted by: JackStraw at August 09, 2017 12:18 PM (/tuJf)

234 she's lucky she wasn't blindfolded and led to a room and got yoda'd in her mouth

Posted by: Rick in SK at August 09, 2017 12:18 PM (FZYNt)

235 Believe me, I'd check that six ways from Sunday, and wait until I had the first installment in hand, before I burned my bridges like that. But having that kind of mind means I don't play the lottery -- which has been called "a tax on dumb people."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at August 09, 2017 12:00 PM (PoXBp)

All through college, it completely baffled me how people would spend money on the lottery. You might as well have struck a match and burned your money in a pile on the floor with as much chance as you had at winning anything substantial.

But now that I'm working full time, with student loans to pay off and a recent mortgage, I see that stupid power ball figure up on a billboard on the way to work. $300M. $325M. $400M. And I start thinking how nice it would be to have that much money and how far it would go.

Now that I'm a working adult with bills and responsibilities and debt, I suddenly understand how tempting it is to play the lottery.

Posted by: joe, living dangerously at August 09, 2017 12:18 PM (KUaJL)

236
By the way, the same people telling us that we cannot use military force against North Korea are the same ones that kept telling us that we have to broker peace deals in the Middle East.

Top. Men.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:19 PM (mbhDw)

237 Over at Gateway Pundit, Universal War Monger John McCain doesn't like the tone Trump is taking with North Korea.

My God. What a tool.

McCain seems to Support War No Matter What, yet when Trump says anything, he's Mr. Pacifist?

/he's really pissed HE's not President, and will do EVERYTHING he can to eff Trump and punish him for winning.

Posted by: shibumi at August 09, 2017 12:19 PM (aT+Bx)

238 My dad loved playing Lotto and when it was just 5 numbers without the Mega number, picked 4 out of the 5 and missed winning $7 million by picking 27 instead of 28.

He was thrilled that he won that and in fact let me and my brother split the winnings.

Miss that guy terribly.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton

_______

Your dad had a very healthy attitude, I would probably be bitter for the rest of my life.

Posted by: Maritime at August 09, 2017 12:19 PM (VDVsF)

239
I see Netflix stock crashing in the coming years, but I've been wrong before.



They have a huge amount of subscribers but they continually are bleeding money. Something like $20 billion in debt.



At some point when lots of similar services start rolling out,
investors are going to want to see a plan to make money and not just
look at the innovation of the business.

Posted by: Maritime at August 09, 2017 12:14 PM (VDVsF)

As someone here said yesterday....they really only have 3 subscribers....everyone else just uses those sign ins.

I'm not saying I do that....but I'm not saying I don't either.

Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 12:19 PM (Enq6K)

240 I used to like eating mashed potatoes

thanks for ruining that

Posted by: Rick in SK at August 09, 2017 12:19 PM (FZYNt)

241 >>Maybe if Obama or Bush and especially Clinton had
actually done something to stop this freak years ago we wouldn't be in
this position, you bedwetting babies. Posted by: JackStraw at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (/tuJf)

Host him for a round at Trump National. Let him sit at George H.W. Bush's favorite table at Peking Duck. Give him an X-Box and Jodee Berry. Send him home all smiles. Easy-peasy.

Posted by: Zod at August 09, 2017 12:19 PM (Bdeb0)

242 232. Heh....when the state lottery came to his state, my grandfather refused to stop playing the numbahs with the entrepreneurs of his acquaintance. 'They're more honest, and they pay out better.'

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine. All Honor & Glory to Kekistan! at August 09, 2017 12:20 PM (fA1SL)

243 Madison Gesiotto
-----------------------------

I'd...

Posted by: RioBravo at August 09, 2017 12:20 PM (SsblQ)

244 My dad loved playing Lotto and when it was just 5 numbers without the Mega number, picked 4 out of the 5 and missed winning $7 million by picking 27 instead of 28.

He was thrilled that he won that and in fact let me and my brother split the winnings.

Miss that guy terribly.

I had 4 out of the 5 numbers without the ball--and this was when it was up to 500 million a couple years ago.
I won $150 bucks.
My sister's friends's father won a million dollars twice on New Jersey's Cash 5 about ten years ago a few months apart...

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 12:20 PM (7uYFy)

245 Over at Gateway Pundit, Universal War Monger John McCain doesn't like the tone Trump is taking with North Korea.

My God. What a tool.

McCain seems to Support War No Matter What, yet when Trump says anything, he's Mr. Pacifist?



Posted by: shibumi
_________
You mean
"Bomb Bomb Bomb, Bomb Bomb Iran" McCain thinks Trump was unpresidential?

Posted by: Maritime at August 09, 2017 12:20 PM (VDVsF)

246 There is a new thread, and it is all about me!

Posted by: Open Borders Marco at August 09, 2017 12:21 PM (aFfY+)

247 Although I'll concede that the V4 came later.

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 12:07 PM (psH+N)


I think the Sonett V4 (the up-engined version of the Sonett II) was a nice looking car, although the ones I still see running around are usually Sonett III's with the pop-up headlights and that squared-off Italian design.

Still miss my 1985 Saab 4-door. Top Gear did a nice in memoriam on the brand, and its quirky engineering, back in 2012.

Posted by: HTL at August 09, 2017 12:21 PM (0l8E+)

248 241 Posted by: Zod at August 09, 2017 12:19 PM (Bdeb0)


Any hot women named Eck? Tell him he can have Eck's box!

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 09, 2017 12:21 PM (mbhDw)

249 As someone here said yesterday....they really only have 3 subscribers....everyone else just uses those sign ins.
I'm not saying I do that....but I'm not saying I don't either.
Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 12:19 PM (Enq6K)
_______


IPspouse says that the best way to reach the kids isn't by texting, it's to change our netflix password.

Posted by: IP at August 09, 2017 12:21 PM (UmSfZ)

250 Now we do have a Twin Peaks here now. Oddly, it's in one of our upscale shopping areas. The food is pretty good there. Management priorities? Eh.

The ladies still didn't seem all that. Maybe it's just me, or maybe I outgrew that stuff, I don't know anymore.

Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at August 09, 2017 12:22 PM (AM1GF)

251 They're looking for anything that can be used as a process crime like they did to Martha Stewart and Scooter Libby.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton
---------

And Berger, don't forget Sandy Berger. Oh...wait...

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 09, 2017 12:22 PM (kusha)

252 But now that I'm working full time, with student loans to pay off and a recent mortgage, I see that stupid power ball figure up on a billboard on the way to work. $300M. $325M. $400M. And I start thinking how nice it would be to have that much money and how far it would go.

Now that I'm a working adult with bills and responsibilities and debt, I suddenly understand how tempting it is to play the lottery.
Posted by: joe, living dangerously at August 09, 2017

*
*
I tell people that if I won the lottery, something big like $300M, on Saturday, on Tuesday you'd hear my tires squealing as I got out of town.

Well, maybe one ticket every week or two wouldn't be too bad. After all, if you don't buy any ticket at all, you have 100% chance of not winning.

Posted by: Lloyd Bridges of at August 09, 2017 12:23 PM (PoXBp)

253 Over at Gateway Pundit, Universal War Monger John McCain doesn't like the tone Trump is taking with North Korea.

My God. What a tool.

McCain seems to Support War No Matter What, yet when Trump says anything, he's Mr. Pacifist?

/he's really pissed HE's not President, and will do EVERYTHING he can to eff Trump and punish him for winning.

Posted by: shibumi at August 09, 2017 12:19 PM (aT+Bx)

Yeah. If there was any doubt-- and around here there isn't--- it evaporated with that comment. He's an asshole.

Posted by: JoeF. at August 09, 2017 12:23 PM (7uYFy)

254 IPspouse says that the best way to reach the kids isn't by texting, it's to change our netflix password.


Posted by: IP at August 09, 2017 12:21 PM (UmSfZ)

LOL! IPspouse is wise.

Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 12:24 PM (Enq6K)

255 I see Netflix stock crashing in the coming years, but I've been wrong before.

They have a huge amount of subscribers but they continually are bleeding money. Something like $20 billion in debt.

At some point when lots of similar services start rolling out,
investors are going to want to see a plan to make money and not just
look at the innovation of the business.

Posted by: Maritime


Disney just announced they're starting their own platform and taking their stuff off Netflix, which had just got an exclusive deal with them.

Can't be good for Netflix.

Posted by: Brother Cavil, Abbot of St. Costello-on-the-Hurlingbone at August 09, 2017 12:24 PM (AM1GF)

256 Wait, that chick in the photo works for Hooters? She doesn't exactly look, er, "qualified," IYKWIM.

At Hooters..things are not what they appear to be...**waving hands like Bruce Lee**

Posted by: Paladin at August 09, 2017 12:24 PM (WujO7)

257 So he went down to the lottery office, handed in his ticket, and was handed $80. What, no, where's my $10 million, he shrieked? Clerk pointed out he only matched 5, not 6.

( *sad trombone* )

Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 11:58 AM (+7xUe)

Memo to self: in case of loto win, cash ticket first.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 09, 2017 12:25 PM (iPbwM)

258 I credit Saab for having a genuine Emergency brake, rather than a parking brake.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 09, 2017 12:25 PM (OdK9v)

259 202 FBN is reporting that Disney will pull it's content from Netflix and start it's own streaming service.
Posted by: Tami at August 09, 2017 12:10 PM (Enq6K)


Starting in 2018, I hear.

Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 12:25 PM (+7xUe)

260 One of the important remaining mysteries of the Bush era was the sudden - and never really explained - abandonment of actions that were really biting on the Norks, and making them scream. I believe it was mostly a war on their finances and ability to conduct business outside their borders.

It was all part of the Proliferation Security Initiative, which targeted many different countries and continued, but the key NoKo-related elements were dropped, without inter-agency review and suddenly, leading to the resignation of the top person involved in day-to-day management of the efforts, the asst. sec. of State for Political-Military Affairs (think I have recall these details correctly).

All this occurring when adults, many of the older school, were in power, there was no press conference, no preening resignation book tour, etc. The guy just quit and said nothing - his top aides were the only ones to let the inquiring press know what happened.

And pffft. Nothing. Of course these were the days when the War on Terror was paramount, and the Norks had been pushed off the front pages for quite some time. But it was remarkable. A major policy, whose successes had in fact received some attention (the Norks were going beserk about it), just dropped, without review, without any statement of any kind from the administration.

Anyway - just a footnote. It does not fit the (quite inaccurate) AOS comment section BDS profile, like many actual facts about those years, but there it's interesting.

Posted by: rhomboid at August 09, 2017 12:25 PM (QDnY+)

261 221 Not a coffee drinker, but could not agree more that Hilary is the President is a thought that can lighten a bad mood over other news at any time.
Posted by: RM at August 09, 2017 12:14 PM (U3LtS)


I assume you meant "Hillary not being President" can lighten up a bad mood.

Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 12:27 PM (+7xUe)

262 "And one ticket, even per week, is actually a pretty cheap and harmless form of entertainment."

Handing money over to government sponsored grifters for nothing never entertained me.

The entire concept is a cynical play upon the most people's beliefs that they are "special" or "lucky". You're not special, and there is no such thing as luck. And if you think God is looking for a way to help you out, He can do it in some way that doesn't involve consistently stripping money from the poorest and most desperate segment of the population.

Posted by: Tom Servo at August 09, 2017 12:27 PM (k1TUh)

263 Still miss my 1985 Saab 4-door. Top Gear did a nice in memoriam on the brand, and its quirky engineering, back in 2012.

Posted by: HTL at August 09, 2017 12:21 PM (0l8E+)

---

Yeah, I'm a sucker for them, too. They were interesting (weird) in a way no other car ever really was, which isn't easy to do.

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 12:27 PM (+fLLK)

264 251 They're looking for anything that can be used as a process crime like they did to Martha Stewart and Scooter Libby.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton
---------

And Berger, don't forget Sandy Berger. Oh...wait...

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 09, 2017 12:22 PM



Hey Sandy...you happy to see me or is that a Top Secret document in your pants?

Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 12:27 PM (0tfLf)

265 Not a coffee drinker, but could not agree more that Hilary is the President is a thought that can lighten a bad mood over other news at any time.
Posted by: RM
------------

So can vodka.

Posted by: Hillary at August 09, 2017 12:28 PM (OdK9v)

266 I like well thought out practical jokes, but am not a fan of stuff like the ToyYoda joke. It does not take a brainiac to realize it has the potential to engender some ill will.

There was a story on Undercover Boss early on where a Hooters manager had waitresses eat messy food without using their hands in some sort of bizarre competition. When the manager was confronted about it, he sort of doubled down on what he did.

Posted by: RM at August 09, 2017 12:29 PM (U3LtS)

267 "I assume you meant "Hillary not being President" can lighten up a bad mood."

__________________________________
__________________________________

Oops! I think maybe I should become a coffee drinker to get the brain cells moving.

Posted by: RM at August 09, 2017 12:31 PM (U3LtS)

268 he sort of doubled down on what he did.
Posted by: RM at August 09, 2017 12:29 PM (U3LtS)
_______


and was fired.

Posted by: IP at August 09, 2017 12:31 PM (UmSfZ)

269 nood ace

Posted by: OregonMuse, AoSHQ Thought Leader at August 09, 2017 12:32 PM (+7xUe)

270 Yeah, I'm a sucker for them, too. They were interesting (weird) in a way no other car ever really was, which isn't easy to do.

Posted by: Moron Robbie, Not Quite as Low-IQ as Michael Obama, But Not as Smart as Some Birds at August 09, 2017 12:27 PM (+fLLK)


In particular, I remember (fondly) the odd sound of the engine, and the fact that you had to put it into reverse to get the key out, and the ignition being in the center console. And Mark Lenard doing the voice-over for the commercials.

For a while, Volvo's motto was "the safest car in Sweden". Which led to one of my friends asking if I enjoyed driving THE MOST DANGEROUS CAR IN SWEDEN. I laughed. Also, I'm not sure that was true...the Saab was a pretty solid piece of engineering.

Occasionally I look at various sites to see if I can find an '85 Saab in decent condition, without having to pay through the nose for something in concours condition. So far, no luck.

Posted by: HTL at August 09, 2017 12:34 PM (0l8E+)

271 To be fair, you're only dumb if you buy lots of tickets thinking that will substantially improve your chances of winning. Statistically, the first ticket you buy increases your odds of winning from precisely zero to something greater than zero; buying more does not yield the same incremental benefit, percentage-wise. And one ticket, even per week, is actually a pretty cheap and harmless form of entertainment.

Posted by: HTL at August 09, 2017 12:12 PM (0l8E+)

This.

Here in Canada, we have two draws a week for Loto 6/49, and I will buy ONE ticket per drawing if the prize pool exceeds seven million dollars.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at August 09, 2017 12:34 PM (iPbwM)

272 192 Hooters shares the same mentality, to me, as a strip club. There's no point in going, since you're not going to get lucky, you're throwing your money down a rat hole and you'll come out just as or even more depressed than you were when you went in. You might as well stay home cruising for porn, except that's a depressing activity as well.
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at August 09, 2017 12:06 PM (X6fMO)

-----------

Never had a problem with picking up the dancers at strip clubs. My problem was that it was easy picking up dancers at strip clubs.

Posted by: Soona at August 09, 2017 12:35 PM (Fmupd)

273 "And Berger, don't forget Sandy Berger. Oh...wait..."

Not the same thing. Sandy the Democrat is just "sloppy". No bad intent.

Posted by: RM at August 09, 2017 12:37 PM (U3LtS)

274 192 Hooters shares the same mentality, to me, as a strip club. There's no point in going, since you're not going to get lucky, you're throwing your money down a rat hole and you'll come out just as or even more depressed than you were when you went in. You might as well stay home cruising for porn, except that's a depressing activity as well.
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at August 09, 2017 12:06 PM (X6fMO)



I don't normally go to a Hooter's...but...the one near my place serves the best hot ham and cheese sammich I have ever found.
Call BS on this if you like, but it is worth it to go at least once for this one menu item.

Posted by: Diogenes at August 09, 2017 12:43 PM (0tfLf)

275 HTL: While the lottery may well be a tax on stupid people, *somebody* wins it every so often, and I wouldn't mind being that somebody. A former girlfriend in Chicago got 5 of 6 for ten grand a few years ago... As to the odds vs tickets purchased, the first ticket obviously brings one's odds of winning from zero to something better than zero. The second ticket doubles one's odds (from one in a zillion to two in a zillion), but every additional ticket has a diminishing return on investment. I figure a hundred bucks a year spent on the "Redneck IRA" on the odd chance of winning is affordable enough.

Posted by: Cowboyneal at August 09, 2017 12:47 PM (IOuCY)

276 "Google is evil" is trending upward on Google (for searches in the United States, not worldwide).

https://trends.google.com/trends/explore?geo=USq=google%20is%20evil

Posted by: SamuelClemensSocks at August 09, 2017 12:47 PM (h8PtN)

277 Babylon Bee: 'Religion Is A Parasite,' Says Guy Living In Mom's Basement
---
"Religion is a destructive leech that feeds on others' resource," wrote the man who has lived off his religious mother's good will for the entirety of his life. "If we can only show people the evils of all those freeloading religious institutions, our society can be free to truly flourish and progress."

"Can you believe that religious organizations don't pay any tax, while we common people struggle to pay Uncle Sam each year?" added the man whom his mother claims as a dependent on her tax returns, and who further has never paid a dime of income taxes in his life.

At publishing time, Wendler had called religion "the opiate of the masses" before firing up a massive bong in his mom's car.
---
Love it.

Posted by: Axeman at August 09, 2017 12:56 PM (2mC6G)

278 ...And if you think God...

1 Corinthians 3:16
Don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in your midst?

Mark 11:24
I tell you, you can pray for anything, and if you believe that you've received it, it will be yours.

Posted by: Mudd at August 09, 2017 12:59 PM (cfHE9)

279 ...How would you feel if you scratched off a winning lottery ticket for 50,000 and went through you're celebration dance in front of your family and friends only to be told it was a prank...

You can buy a ticket similar if not exactly like that. At least one Americas Funniest Videos. I didn't think it was funny.

Entire section of videos on youtube.

Posted by: Mudd at August 09, 2017 01:05 PM (cfHE9)

280 Easy question. I hate mashed potatoes; my absolute least favorite food. But I my life depended on it, I could eat the bag.

Posted by: George LeS at August 09, 2017 01:26 PM (+TcCF)

281 Mark 11:24
I tell you, you can pray for anything, and if you believe that you've received it, it will be yours.

IF it's God's will and you have completely submitted yourself to God and wish to know and and do and love his will, A "gimme" list that we be wealthy because of "name it and claim it" theology-well that's rank materialism and not Christianity.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at August 09, 2017 01:26 PM (iVOAv)

282 I had three different Saab 900's and one 9000 turbo. Absolutely great, fun cars. Built like tanks. Ford killed 'em.

Posted by: free tibet with purchase of equal or great value tibet at August 09, 2017 01:30 PM (U4PcL)

283 The lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes and the pride of life have all been Christianized" (not by the liberal, mind you, but by the evangelicals) and are now being offered along with Christ to everyone who will believe."... the very values Christ scorned are now being used to attract people to the gospel.

A. W Tozer


The Pastor writer A.W. TozerTozer warned of this decades ago, Now it's standard with the "Gab it and grab it" folks

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at August 09, 2017 01:30 PM (iVOAv)

284 You go, gorilla.

Posted by: wth at August 09, 2017 03:09 PM (HgMAr)

285 I remember the Hooters waitress story. She won her lawsuit and they had to buy her a real Toyota car. Don't remember if they had to go brand new or not tho.

Posted by: Mitchell at August 09, 2017 04:07 PM (BvNzB)

286 last

Posted by: Cuthbert the Witless at August 09, 2017 04:29 PM (ymnmz)

287 Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at August 09, 2017 12:11 PM (3OIiX)

Exactly. If women have been debased into narcissistic assholes, fuck 'em. We can manufacture simulacrii.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at August 10, 2017 08:52 AM (RMoQQ)

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