Glorifying A Dictatorship? The Onion Has Nothing On Cosmo

Starvation has been in the socialist toolkit for a very long time. Of course Stalin used to it to great effect, although we cannot discount Mao and Pol Pot and our current socialist hell-hole in Venezuela as strong competitors. But maniacal, homicidal despots killing their serfs is one thing....clueless "content directors" at Cosmo who ignorantly gloss over the human catastrophe that is socialism is something entirely different. Why Cosmo loves the 'Cuban diet', written by that famous political economist Rosie Mullender

Between 1990 and 1995, thanks to the collapse of the Soviet Union, Cuban people were forced to alter their entire lifestyles. They couldn't afford petrol, so the government provided them with bicycles. People started walking everywhere. Food was also in shorter supply - there were no supermarket aisles stuffed with junk food or wallets stuffed with money with which to buy it.
In short, Cubans could no longer afford to be fat. In that five-year period, they lost an average of around five kilos per person, which is over 11lbs. As a result of people getting slimmer, they also started living longer, with fewer Cubans dying of diabetes and heart disease.
All of which is fantastic - except it didn't last. When the crisis ended, people started eating more and moving less and putting all that weight back on until, in the mid 2000s, they were right back where they started.

What this clueless wonder doesn't seem to understand is that when whole populations can't get enough food, the one's on the margin die. I have to assume that she is simply an ignorant idiot and not a willing participant in the Left's campaign to resurrect International Socialism. Based on her other cutting edge analyses like "15 bikini struggles girls with big boobs will FEEL," and "Why you'll get over your break-up faster than he will. So ha," I'm betting on stupidity.

Next up? "Want Great Abs? Move To North Korea!"

[H/T Elizabeth N. Brown]

Addendum Cosmo seems to have shit-canned the article. I wonder why? If anyone can dig up an archived copy somewhere I will be eternally in your debt.

And fixed thanks to commenter Stephen Price Blair!

Posted by: CBD at 11:45 AM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 The left is insane.

Posted by: PAgirlinNC at April 19, 2017 11:38 AM (/5WQL)

2 If there's one thing that's wrong with the world, it's people having more than enough to eat.

We must fix this, comrades!

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 11:39 AM (mC1ZI)

3 In Cuba, no part of the chicken goes to waste.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 19, 2017 11:39 AM (8bm9h)

4 Cubans positively eschew wasteful consumer culture.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 19, 2017 11:40 AM (8bm9h)

5 Add her to that putz, I think he is from England, and how North Korea totally has a handle on the whole obesity thing. These people...

Posted by: deplorable Jewells45 at April 19, 2017 11:41 AM (zRZaJ)

6 Constipated? Move to North Korea today!

Posted by: Under Fire at April 19, 2017 11:41 AM (nN3W/)

7 Cuban diet? So go eat a rat, you clueless fucking bitch.

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 11:41 AM (8b+oT)

8 My oldest SiL has been to Cuba twice with her husband.

She loves to brag that she's been able to "experience" the country before capitalism "ruins" it.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:42 AM (PY9jH)

9 This is the same mage who just published an article about how men wanting to please women in bed is the horrid patriarchy, yes?

Whatever they're sniffing/smoking/mainlining, they need to stop. Serious 'dain bramage' is happening there...

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 11:43 AM (NOIQH)

10 Nobody was fat in Demolition Man's sewers, either.

Evil and stupid are hard to tell apart, sometimes.

Posted by: Chupacabra at April 19, 2017 11:43 AM (WFzg2)

11 ...and when there was no meat, we ate fowl, and when there was no fowl, we ate crawdad. And when there was no crawdad to be found, we ate sand.

Posted by: Raising AriZodna at April 19, 2017 11:43 AM (Bdeb0)

12 8 My oldest SiL has been to Cuba twice with her husband.

She loves to brag that she's been able to "experience" the country before capitalism "ruins" it.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:42 AM (PY9jH)

==============

Sounds like a peach.

You should suggest that she move there.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 11:43 AM (mC1ZI)

13 Not remotely surprising. Lefties sincerely worry about Cuba being "ruined" by overdevelopment, symbolized by McDonald's. God forbid the little people live above subsistence levels.

Posted by: gewa76 at April 19, 2017 11:43 AM (f4GSC)

14 Stalin was merely putting Ukrainians on a diet.

Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2017 11:43 AM (r/0kC)

15 Enjoy dysentery!

Posted by: RioBravo at April 19, 2017 11:43 AM (OmhcY)

16 Only one man in N Korea gets plenty to eat, bet you can't guess who that might be...

Posted by: Colin at April 19, 2017 11:44 AM (wFJmU)

17 14 Stalin was merely putting Ukrainians on a diet.
Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2017 11:43 AM (r/0kC)

=================

So did Mao. And Hitler in those fitness camps.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 11:44 AM (mC1ZI)

18 Yeah, I'd rather not go on the Holodomor diet, thanks.

Posted by: joncelli, Longbow Afficianado and Phalangist at April 19, 2017 11:44 AM (RD7QR)

19 You'll be amazed at the exfoliating properties of a vigorous flogging!

Posted by: Muldoon at April 19, 2017 11:44 AM (lHb9q)

20 Sounds like a peach.

You should suggest that she move there.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 11:43 AM (mC1ZI)

How I wish she would.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:44 AM (PY9jH)

21 Buena Vista Social and Weight Watchers Club

Posted by: scottst at April 19, 2017 11:44 AM (idA6q)

22 The author should live in a Soviet gulag for at least a year. Love to gauge his/her opinion at the end of the year.

Posted by: Locke Common at April 19, 2017 11:44 AM (OvHr4)

23 16 Only one man in N Korea gets plenty to eat, bet you can't guess who that might be...
Posted by: Colin at April 19, 2017 11:44 AM (wFJmU)

===============

Bob, the guy who sits in the hotel lobby of that huge empty hotel?

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 11:45 AM (mC1ZI)

24 >>What this clueless wonder doesn't seem to understand is that when whole
populations can't get enough food, the one's on the margin die.

Sadly, I think that in addition to her stupidity, killing off parts of the population is just not that horrifying a thought to a lot of progressives.
Abortion, assisted suicide, withholding meds from seniors because they've already lived their lives - these are all now acceptable positions on the Left.

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 11:45 AM (NOIQH)

25 The starvation will continue until your GAINZZ improve.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:45 AM (PY9jH)

26 So that's all we need to combat obesity here... A Dictator! Wait, we had one for 8 years...

Posted by: It's Me donna at April 19, 2017 11:45 AM (O2RFr)

27 People who rail about Cuba being ruined are the same ones who hand-wave away the deaths that could have been prevented if DDT hadn't been banned.

Posted by: Chupacabra at April 19, 2017 11:45 AM (WFzg2)

28 There is a pretty large portion of western culture that believes looking hot and getting laid is the entire purpose of human existence. They have no higher goals, and indeed are unable to imagine any.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 19, 2017 11:46 AM (39g3+)

29 24 To be fair,they have been acceptable positions to the left for a long time.

Posted by: steevy at April 19, 2017 11:46 AM (r/0kC)

30 Scurvy is no longer your grandads
blessing when you're in North Korea.

Posted by: Vogue at April 19, 2017 11:46 AM (nN3W/)

31 They couldn't afford petrol, so the government provided them with bicycles. People started walking everywhere. Food was also in shorter supply - there were no supermarket aisles stuffed with junk food or wallets stuffed with money with which to buy it.

---

Luxury!

Posted by: Yorkshire socialist at April 19, 2017 11:46 AM (oGRue)

32 Liquidate those pounds like a Kulak, comrades!

Posted by: joncelli, Longbow Afficianado and Phalangist at April 19, 2017 11:46 AM (RD7QR)

33 Poverty envy.

It's such a weird thing.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 11:46 AM (mC1ZI)

34 What, no Pol Pot fitness plan?

We can start at year zero.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at April 19, 2017 11:46 AM (IaeYB)

35 Are we sure the writer isn't Mooch?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:46 AM (PY9jH)

36 Why are all the women at these publications telling women how to look beautiful, so fucking ugly?

That Rosie is a real dog. And I only say that because fuck you.

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 11:47 AM (8b+oT)

37 "Overweight? Determined to get that weight off fast? Join Club Holodomor and watch the pounds melt away!"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2017 11:47 AM (SRKgf)

38 Do you know what also gets rid of that stubborn 30 pounds you've been carrying since Freshman year?

Cancer.

Thanks Cosmo...

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 11:47 AM (zsHGH)

39 Lose weight the Cambodian way! Ask me how!

Posted by: Zombie Pol Pot at April 19, 2017 11:47 AM (qJhUV)

40 Poverty envy.

We can take care of that for you

Posted by: The Democrats at April 19, 2017 11:47 AM (O2RFr)

41 Linky no worky.

Bet someone with half a brain told them the article was bad idea.

Posted by: McLurkerson at April 19, 2017 11:47 AM (35/F6)

42 38 Do you know what also gets rid of that stubborn 30 pounds you've been carrying since Freshman year?

Cancer.

Thanks Cosmo...
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 11:47 AM (zsHGH)

===============

That's nothing. You should try AIDS.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 11:47 AM (mC1ZI)

43 As a result of people getting slimmer, they also started living longer, with fewer Cubans dying of diabetes and heart disease.

---

It's a true fast

Posted by: Hungry Commie Statistician at April 19, 2017 11:47 AM (oGRue)

44 Boy, every time you think they've scraped as deep into the bottom of the barrel as they can go, they pull another rabbit out of the hat.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Doctor of Thinkology at April 19, 2017 11:48 AM (Nwg0u)

45 A Second Look at Bulimia

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at April 19, 2017 11:48 AM (4ErVI)

46 "The Gulag Arugulapelago"

Posted by: Muldoon at April 19, 2017 11:48 AM (lHb9q)

47 43 As a result of people getting slimmer, they also started living longer, with fewer Cubans dying of diabetes and heart disease.

---

It's a true fast
Posted by: Hungry Commie Statistician at April 19, 2017 11:47 AM (oGRue)

===============

"You should visit our hospitals, too."

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 11:48 AM (mC1ZI)

48 20 Sounds like a peach.

You should suggest that she move there.

---

they'll just eat her up

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 19, 2017 11:48 AM (oGRue)

49 Are we sure the writer isn't Mooch?

Why ? Is she munching on some ribs?

Posted by: It's Me donna at April 19, 2017 11:48 AM (O2RFr)

50 >>As a result of people getting slimmer, they also started living longer, with fewer Cubans dying of diabetes and heart disease.

Right. Which is great, since they probably weren't too aggressive in treating heart disease and diabetes with their socialized medicine.

Would love to see what the heights were of these survivors, as we've seen in places where people don't get a lot of protein, the population gets shorter as well as skinnier.

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 11:48 AM (NOIQH)

51 We all know how Michael Moore thinks their healthcare is the best in the world.

He should move there and maybe lose that fat ass of his.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:49 AM (PY9jH)

52 @TheJamesMadison

The Hi 5 that never leaves you hanging, huh?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 11:49 AM (zsHGH)

53 The Cosmo and Teen Vogue writers aren't just dumb, but stubbornly so.

Seeing them get their asses handed to them on the talk show or online is instructive.

Posted by: Chupacabra at April 19, 2017 11:49 AM (WFzg2)

54 "What this clueless wonder doesn't seem to understand is that when whole populations can't get enough food, the one's on the margin die. "

Exactly. How many died of malnutrition-related issues instead? Or didn't die of diabetes and heart disease because they had *already* died of something preventable in a functioning economy?

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 19, 2017 11:49 AM (sEDyY)

55 Cuban sandwich > Reuben sandwich

That's all I got.

Posted by: Lance McCormick at April 19, 2017 11:49 AM (u0s1P)

56 For the barely-human hedonist, being fat is worse than being unfaithful. Having excess body hair is a sin worse than theft. Age is worse than selfishness. Their entire worldview is around being young and healthy and having as much sex as possible so you can string enough orgasms together between drugs to avoid thinking about how empty and meaningless your existence is.

And when you start to get old, you freak out and grasp at any anti-aging nonsense, cosmetic surgery, HGH, and anything else you can to avoid being dignified, graceful, and wise.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 19, 2017 11:49 AM (39g3+)

57
Cosmo's May issue is about How To Get A Flat Tummy For Bikini Season!

Cosmo suggests....

Cancer.

Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 11:49 AM (/MtvT)

58 Now I want a Cuban sammich.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:49 AM (PY9jH)

59 I said it before, and I shall say it again:

Make me president. For one day.

Every nickelfucker who praises a socialist / communist / dictatorial hellhole over the US because of their "healthy lifestyle," "education," "health care" or any other currently-en vogue phrase is immediately swept up by a SWAT team, placed in a cargo jet and deported post haste to whatever country they have finished fellating.

You will be tossed off (parachute provided) and left there. The US embassy (if any) will be instructed that you are not to be assisted or sheltered in any way. You are now a permanent resident of that shithole you so recently praised.

And if they don't want you? This president does not care. Your passport has been revoked. You are no longer a citizen of the United States. If you try to return and are caught, you are deported again. If you are caught a second time, you are executed.

So let it be written, so let it be done.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (X6fMO)

60 So Cosmo will have no problems when Trump opens the camps? Think of the weight loss opportunities!! Even Sally Kohn will be impressed with her new bikini bod!

Posted by: tu3031 at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (qJhUV)

61
No, not really.

Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (/MtvT)

62 >>Do you know what also gets rid of that stubborn 30 pounds you've been carrying since Freshman year?
Cancer.

"And you know how to get rid of the last 8 lbs or so in one swing?"
--- ISIS

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (NOIQH)

63 The tapeworms!!!

Posted by: PETA at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (nN3W/)

64 I'm reading a biography of Gen. Sherman and in it, the author talks about how 'in shape' the soldiers of the March to the Sea were.

Yeah, war is also a great weight loss regimen.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (zsHGH)

65 "I'm the gonk-collecting, cheese-nibbling, novel-writing, burrito-blogging, mag-reading, Twitter-loving, gym-going, gin-drinking, pasta-making, puppy-stalking, man-chasing, fast-knitting, fruit-and-veg-shunning Features Editor of Cosmo. Prick me, and I bleed pizza."

Prick her? Not a chance.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (SRKgf)

66 Poverty envy.

It's such a weird thing.
-----
For them it's kind of like looking a puppies. The impoverished are sooo adorable and helpless. Traveling to Cuba and seeing the poverty reminds them how absolutely superior they are.

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (8b+oT)

67 38 Do you know what also gets rid of that stubborn 30 pounds you've been carrying since Freshman year?

---

swimming the Florida Strait?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (oGRue)

68 Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:42 AM (PY9jH)

And you've managed not to injure her? Running for sainthood.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (sEDyY)

69 Travel shows are disturbing about Cuba as well. Look at all these wonderful classic cars! Look at the charming architecture!

Yeah, they have crap cars because nobody can afford anything better and have to make due with old, restoring it with cardboard and tin cans to try to keep it running. The "Charming" architecture is vintage shanty with a new paint job for that part of town you're allowed into.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 19, 2017 11:51 AM (39g3+)

70 There is a pretty large portion of western culture that believes looking hot and getting laid is the entire purpose of human existence. They have no higher goals, and indeed are unable to imagine any.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 19, 2017 11:46 AM (39g3+)

At this point, I'll settle for just "getting laid," thank you.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 19, 2017 11:51 AM (X6fMO)

71 For the barely-human hedonist, being fat is worse than being unfaithful. Having excess body hair is a sin worse than theft. Age is worse than selfishness. Their entire worldview is around being young and healthy and having as much sex as possible so you can string enough orgasms together between drugs to avoid thinking about how empty and meaningless your existence is.

And when you start to get old, you freak out and grasp at any anti-aging nonsense, cosmetic surgery, HGH, and anything else you can to avoid being dignified, graceful, and wise.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 19, 2017 11:49 AM (39g3+)

You're not wrong...

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 11:51 AM (zsHGH)

72 I thought Cosmo was just about new sex positions. I guess they have expanded into the diet and fitness.

Posted by: Picric at April 19, 2017 11:52 AM (s0VSd)

73 Cosmo's May issue is about How To Get A Flat Tummy For Bikini Season!

Cosmo suggests....

Cancer.
Posted by: Soothsayer 45 at April 19, 2017 11:49 AM (/MtvT)

The Advocate suggests ...

AIDS.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2017 11:52 AM (SRKgf)

74 You know what you never hear anymore? A society is judged by how it treats its most vulnerable.

Posted by: I had a name, but I forgot at April 19, 2017 11:52 AM (g+p/6)

75 These are the idiots Bruno was spoofing.
"Darfur is so over. What's the next big thing? What's Darfive?"

Posted by: gewa76 at April 19, 2017 11:52 AM (f4GSC)

76 >>> Every nickelfucker who praises a socialist / communist / dictatorial hellhole over the US because of their "healthy lifestyle," "education," "health care" or any other currently-en vogue phrase is immediately swept up by a SWAT team, placed in a cargo jet and deported post haste to whatever country they have finished fellating.

Cut, jib, newsletter, etc

Posted by: fluffy at April 19, 2017 11:52 AM (jw2Xw)

77 In the end, all the Left cares about is being able to come up to you and tell you that they've just ordered your death.

Posted by: Hikaru at April 19, 2017 11:52 AM (CMbMd)

78 Exactly. How many died of malnutrition-related issues instead? Or didn't die of diabetes and heart disease because they had *already* died of something preventable in a functioning economy?

---

these un-persons can be assumed to not exist and it does wonders for our life expectancy tables

Posted by: Hungry Commie Statistician at April 19, 2017 11:52 AM (oGRue)

79 @Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing

$300 and Backpage will solve that problem. Not risk free, but just sayin'

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 11:53 AM (zsHGH)

80 This is where the Vox writers went?

"The social benefits of anorexia nervosa"

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2017 11:53 AM (7ZVPa)

81 55 Cuban sandwich > Reuben sandwich

That's all I got.

---

Mark Cuban---you----????

Posted by: Hungry Commie Statistician at April 19, 2017 11:53 AM (oGRue)

82 19 You'll be amazed at the exfoliating properties of a vigorous flogging!
Posted by: Muldoon at April 19, 2017 11:44 AM (lHb9q)
*
*
Wish you were taller? Try The Rack, the latest thing from North Korea's Bureau of Thought Corrections! (Longer pants and new knee and back joints sold separately)

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 19, 2017 11:54 AM (W1BJy)

83 The life expectancy of Cuba is ten times that of the USA, and we have 250% literacy! Foolish capitalist running dogs and your freedoms!

Posted by: Raoul Castro at April 19, 2017 11:54 AM (39g3+)

84 Meanwhile, on a mega yacht in the South Pacific, Mooch and Barry are chowing down with Orca, Hanks, and Springsteen.

Typical Progs.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:54 AM (PY9jH)

85 As a result of people getting slimmer, they also started living longer, with fewer Cubans dying of diabetes and heart disease.

Probably dying from infectious diseases they're too weak to fight off.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2017 11:54 AM (SRKgf)

86 O/T - O'Reilly out at Fox. Next on the chopping block: Hannity, Tucker. So long, "conservative" media.

Bwahahahahaha!

Posted by: The Murdoch Bros. at April 19, 2017 11:54 AM (joFoi)

87 In other news, Donald Trump devastates America by dramatically reducing funployment! Fight Drumpf so you too can have time to live the good life in your parents basement!

Posted by: Cosmo at April 19, 2017 11:54 AM (eSx+E)

88 64 I'm reading a biography of Gen. Sherman and in it, the author talks about how 'in shape' the soldiers of the March to the Sea were.

Yeah, war is also a great weight loss regimen.

---

word

Posted by: Battling Bastards of Bataan at April 19, 2017 11:54 AM (oGRue)

89 And when you start to get old, you freak out and grasp at any anti-aging nonsense, cosmetic surgery, HGH, and anything else you can to avoid being dignified, graceful, and wise.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor

--

And, send money to their advertisers.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 19, 2017 11:54 AM (7ZVPa)

90 Next Issue: Why are Cubans so much better at recycling than Americans? Just look how long they keep the same car.

Posted by: Cosmo at April 19, 2017 11:55 AM (VHt7K)

91 "I'm the gonk-collecting, cheese-nibbling, novel-writing, burrito-blogging, mag-reading, Twitter-loving, gym-going, gin-drinking, pasta-making, puppy-stalking, man-chasing, fast-knitting, fruit-and-veg-shunning Features Editor of Cosmo. Prick me, and I bleed pizza."

Prick her? Not a chance.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (SRKgf)

I was actually intrigued right up until 'Features Editor of Cosmo'.

Major turn off.
I can't even.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 11:55 AM (zsHGH)

92 Abuse of apostrophe's drive's me up the wall's.

Posted by: WhatWhatWhat? at April 19, 2017 11:56 AM (ul9CR)

93 There was an interesting wrinkle in the Cuban nutrition statistics that brings the validity into question. It seems that a large number of malnourished individuals slipped through the cracks.

Posted by: Muldoon at April 19, 2017 11:56 AM (lHb9q)

94 Number of SJWs emigrating to Cuba: 0.

Number of SJWs visiting Cuba to use their Yanqui dollars to buy stuff cheap (including underage girls) > 0

Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 11:56 AM (eSx+E)

95 Of course no one is stopping this asshole from moving to Cooba...but of course she must first give up all her assests and worldly goods to the poor here and live like a real cooban in a communist dictatorship? Or is she just a limo liberal? LOL

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 19, 2017 11:56 AM (SjImc)

96 O/T LOL. Don Lemon compared Jon Tossoff to Barack Obama.

I guess in Don's mind, Tossoff is half-black. Or something.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:57 AM (PY9jH)

97 OMG - COMO ESTA GAINZZZZZZ!

Posted by: Fox at April 19, 2017 11:57 AM (DVC2D)

98 Like just about everyone else said above, if a person can't afford purchase/acquire enough food to meet minimum dietary requirements, they can't afford quality health care, either.

And bicycles? I guess the spare parts market for the 1951 Studebaker has finally collapsed.

Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 11:57 AM (Pqytn)

99 At some point, if Cuba gets McDonald's and they don't want them, they will go out of business and there will be no more McDonald's in Cuba.

Example 327 of how the left hates it when everyone doesn't agree with them.

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 11:57 AM (8b+oT)

100 Hell, I know I can't look at concentration camp photos without thinking "Man, look at those slim bodies - so jealous!"

If only my country loved me enough to forcibly starve me into that perfect beach bod.

Posted by: broseidon being a capitalist pigdog (yknow, working) at April 19, 2017 11:58 AM (oZ6kz)

101 8 My oldest SiL has been to Cuba twice with her husband.

She loves to brag that she's been able to "experience" the country before capitalism "ruins" it.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:42 AM (PY9jH)

OOH OOH OOH! This is where I get to re-link the hilarious Millennial review of the trip he and his friends took to "unspoiled" Cuba, in which they complain about the food, their nonexistent AirBnB, and how expensive everything is.

https://twitter.com/nowhere_nh/status/817047151217934336

You'll laugh so hard, you'll cry.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 11:58 AM (4df7R)

102 Don Lemon has a broken heart.

'He Sounded Like Barack Obama!' Don Lemon Notes Jon Ossoff's Rhetorical Style

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Doctor of Thinkology at April 19, 2017 11:58 AM (Nwg0u)

103 Not one to want to defend a Kardashian, but Kim K is catching hell on twitter for joking that having the flu is a great way to lose weight, but those detractors are the same people who support insane shit like this.

Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2017 11:58 AM (7HtZB)

104 O/T - O'Reilly out at Fox. Next on the chopping block: Hannity, Tucker. So long, "conservative" media.

Bwahahahahaha!
***
That's like cutting out carbs in your diet by starting with flank steak. And yes Bill is an ass.

Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 11:58 AM (eSx+E)

105 The article is gone.

I would ask if there were any editors there but apparently the writer *is* the editor, which is probably why no one stopped it.

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 11:58 AM (NOIQH)

106 PLEASE, DONALD! OPEN THE CAMPS!! I HAVE TO GET RID OF MY WINTER WEIGHT!!! I'M NOT A STUPID FUCKING LUNATIC LIKE EVERYBODY SAYS!!!

Posted by: The Hysterical Sally Kohn at April 19, 2017 11:58 AM (qJhUV)

107
For the barely-human hedonist, being fat is worse than being unfaithful.
Having excess body hair is a sin worse than theft. Age is worse than
selfishness.
=====

Smoking is worse than all.

Posted by: mustbequantum at April 19, 2017 11:58 AM (MIKMs)

108
In Cuba, no part of the chicken goes to waste.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero)

You're telling me!!

Posted by: The Chicken at April 19, 2017 11:58 AM (IqV8l)

109 Tucker should get BillO's slot.

Posted by: WhatWhatWhat? at April 19, 2017 11:59 AM (ul9CR)

110 $300 and Backpage will solve that problem. Not risk free, but just sayin'

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 11:53 AM (zsHGH)

You laugh, but the thought has often crossed my mind. The problem is, of course, that just sex in itself isn't going to make me feel any better. It's akin to why I won't go to a "gentleman's club," either; I feel lousy enough as it is, why go someplace only to walk out and look for the nearest suicide booth?

Hey, how about a picture of Donna Reed?

http://tinyurl.com/kqtomou

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 19, 2017 11:59 AM (X6fMO)

111 "I'm the gonk-collecting, cheese-nibbling, novel-writing,
burrito-blogging, mag-reading, Twitter-loving, gym-going, gin-drinking,
pasta-making, puppy-stalking, man-chasing, fast-knitting,
fruit-and-veg-shunning Features Editor of Cosmo. Prick me, and I bleed
pizza."
-----
She writes like a high school yearbook editor.

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 11:59 AM (8b+oT)

112 Beth!

Posted by: fluffy at April 19, 2017 11:59 AM (jw2Xw)

113 Having excess body hair is a sin worse than theft.
***
Have you seen the average SJW? Male or female?

Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 12:00 PM (eSx+E)

114 Not one to want to defend a Kardashian, but Kim K is catching hell on twitter for joking that having the flu is a great way to lose weight, but those detractors are the same people who support insane shit like this.
Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2017 11:58 AM (7HtZB)

Yeah, no foul there. I've made the same joke myself.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 12:00 PM (zsHGH)

115 "I'm the gonk-collecting, cheese-nibbling, novel-writing, burrito-blogging, mag-reading, Twitter-loving, gym-going, gin-drinking, pasta-making, puppy-stalking, man-chasing, fast-knitting, fruit-and-veg-shunning Features Editor of Cosmo. Prick me, and I bleed pizza."

Lots of food talk from this advocate of starving people.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2017 12:00 PM (SRKgf)

116 "I'm the gonk-collecting..."

Oh, nice. Kids in Cuba go their entire lives without seeing a gonk in a zoo, much less in the wild, and here's Ms. Fancypants collecting gonks like they're baseball cards. She probably has a whole warehouse full of gonks on shelves, luxuriates in a bath of gonk nightly, and meanwhile people are dying in street protests for their government allotment of gonk. Do you think she cares? Of course not. She's sitting pretty on a pile of gonk, gonking it up gonk-style.

Posted by: hogmartin at April 19, 2017 12:01 PM (8nWyX)

117 on the plus side, all Cuban girls swallow

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 19, 2017 12:01 PM (oGRue)

118 I couldn't find the Cosmo article, but found the 2013 "UA" article it was lifted from. It's short on analysis and follow up. While diagnosis of heart disease deaths and diabetes went down in the short term, with no widespread starvation and war, it doesn't address any related issues, like malnutrition. Fluff.

Posted by: LASue at April 19, 2017 12:01 PM (CLKfs)

119 malnourished individuals slipped through the cracks.

I think when Slapweasel sees what you did there, he's going to want to fight you.

Posted by: Sporkatus at April 19, 2017 12:01 PM (eXSOZ)

120 Did they remove the article? I cannot find it at the link provided.

Posted by: Inogame at April 19, 2017 12:01 PM (ySZHT)

121 113 Having excess body hair is a sin worse than theft.
***
Have you seen the average SJW? Male or female?
Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 12:00 PM (eSx+E)

This is about me, isn't it?

Posted by: Moldylocks at April 19, 2017 12:01 PM (SRKgf)

122 OOH OOH OOH! This is where I get to re-link the
hilarious Millennial review of the trip he and his friends took to
"unspoiled" Cuba, in which they complain about the food, their
nonexistent AirBnB, and how expensive everything is.

https://twitter.com/nowhere_nh/status/817047151217934336

You'll laugh so hard, you'll cry.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 11:58 AM (4df7R)================================

Good grief. That could have been written by one of my husband's sibs. So much stupid crammed into one pointy little head.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 12:01 PM (PY9jH)

123 Cuba! Live longer. Hate life more.

Posted by: What's my name? Suck it, , that's my name at April 19, 2017 12:02 PM (7YZyt)

124 Jesus H. can we talk about how incredibly stupid Don Lemon is? I want to throat punch that asshole.

Posted by: deplorable Jewells45 at April 19, 2017 12:02 PM (zRZaJ)

125 Want to be a long-distance walker and get your legs in shape?

Move to Syria.

Posted by: Refugee at April 19, 2017 12:02 PM (yxVpR)

126 124
Jesus H. can we talk about how incredibly stupid Don Lemon is? I want to throat punch that asshole.

Posted by: deplorable Jewells45 at April 19, 2017 12:02 PM (zRZaJ)

It is ALWAYS acceptable to talk about the desire to throat punch Don Lemon. It's almost a civic duty.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 12:02 PM (4df7R)

127 $300 and Backpage will solve that problem. Not risk free, but just sayin'

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 11:53 AM (zsHGH)

You laugh, but the thought has often crossed my mind. The problem is, of course, that just sex in itself isn't going to make me feel any better. It's akin to why I won't go to a "gentleman's club," either; I feel lousy enough as it is, why go someplace only to walk out and look for the nearest suicide booth?

Hey, how about a picture of Donna Reed?

http://tinyurl.com/kqtomou
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 19, 2017 11:59 AM (X6fMO)

Awww, she's cute!

Yeah, I hear ya. Most escorts can't help with emotional needs. A few can, but that's like striking oil when you're digging...you know, never mind the metaphor.

Having been there, before and after marriage, I suggest you find women you can be friends with (salsa dancing classes or yoga work well) and hire escorts occasionally to deal with physical needs/fun.

But that's just what I would do.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 12:03 PM (zsHGH)

128 "I'm the gonk-collecting, cheese-nibbling, novel-writing, burrito-blogging, mag-reading, Twitter-loving, gym-going, gin-drinking, pasta-making, puppy-stalking, man-chasing, fast-knitting, fruit-and-veg-shunning Features Editor of Cosmo. Prick me, and I bleed pizza."

------

Big girl? Roomy in the hips?

Posted by: Hannibal Lecter at April 19, 2017 12:03 PM (7HtZB)

129 "She writes like a high school yearbook editor.

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 11:59 AM (8b+oT) "

I guess there was a 50 for 1 sale on hyphens at the shitty writing store.

Posted by: broseidon being a capitalist pigdog (yknow, working) at April 19, 2017 12:03 PM (oZ6kz)

130 You left out our boy Kim Jong Un's daddy. It's estimated that several million Nork's starved to death during the late 90's. I've also read that 64 years after the signing of the armistice, the average South Korean is a full 6" taller than the average North Korean. It ain't genetics.

Posted by: Pendejo at April 19, 2017 12:03 PM (yKJ+U)

131 10 miles from the Hiroshima blast is great for a super fast tan!

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 12:04 PM (8b+oT)

132 128 "Prick me, and I bleed pizza."

------

Big girl? Roomy in the hips?
Posted by: Hannibal Lecter at April 19, 2017 12:03 PM (7HtZB)

===============

What part of that description would lead you to believe that?

And are you asking for a friend? Say a Buffalo Bill?

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 12:04 PM (mC1ZI)

133 Sick, evil, demented... bet she is pro"choice" too. Poverty is good for a body. SPIT!

Posted by: USNtakim at April 19, 2017 12:04 PM (hMqvx)

134 @hogmartin

What is the love that dare not speak its name?

Gonk love.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 12:04 PM (zsHGH)

135 Really Comrade, what is a few tens of thousands of deaths in the search for the communist utopia and a rocking beach bod?

Priorities, man.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 19, 2017 12:04 PM (9CkBG)

136 "She writes like a high school yearbook editor.

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 11:59 AM (8b+oT) "

I guess there was a 50 for 1 sale on hyphens at the shitty writing store.

Posted by: broseidon

******

I think we can conclude that her hyphen is intact.

Posted by: Muldoon at April 19, 2017 12:04 PM (lHb9q)

137 10 miles from the Hiroshima blast is great for a super fast tan!

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 12:04 PM (8b+oT)

Heh.

Posted by: golfman at April 19, 2017 12:04 PM (yxVpR)

138 As soon as you see the word "petrol", you should know that it's time to move on.

Posted by: tu3031 at April 19, 2017 12:04 PM (qJhUV)

139 Oh and OT:
Drudge has an article link to a beaver 'herding' cattle. Yes, in Canada. Why do you ask?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 12:05 PM (zsHGH)

140 Good grief. That could have been written by one of my husband's sibs. So much stupid crammed into one pointy little head.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 12:01 PM (PY9jH)

I go back and read it sometimes, just to remind myself that yes, it's real. Someone actually wrote it. Unironically.

This is probably the line that really encapsulates the idiocy. Remember, he's saying this about CUBA, a place that they deliberately wanted to visit before it's ruined by eeeeevil capitalism:
I didn't know this at the time but most of these restaurants and places are government owned.
People ask, "What are they TEACHING kids in schools these days?"

And my answer is, "Absolutely nothing."

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 12:05 PM (4df7R)

141 10 miles from the Hiroshima blast is great for a super fast tan!

Posted by: Dang

*****

You can literally watch the pounds melt away!

Posted by: Muldoon at April 19, 2017 12:05 PM (lHb9q)

142
Um.... So what's this about bikinis and big boobs again?

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 19, 2017 12:05 PM (ODxAs)

143 She writes like a high school yearbook editor.

Its probably uncharitable but that's probably the zenith of her intellectual maturation.

Posted by: Raoul Castro at April 19, 2017 12:05 PM (39g3+)

144 I hate O'Reilly and will not miss him but as I said yesterday I am sorry the left has another scalp.

But O'Reilly will be laughing all the way to the Bank

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 19, 2017 12:05 PM (SjImc)

145 I've also read that 64 years after the signing of the armistice, the
average South Korean is a full 6" taller than the average North Korean.
It ain't genetics.
***
Ever notice how the people running communist states always get it wrong...but don't worry the ones here in the US will get it right this time!

Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 12:06 PM (eSx+E)

146 Do you know what also gets rid of that stubborn 30 pounds you've been carrying since Freshman year?

---

ISIS vest

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at April 19, 2017 12:06 PM (oGRue)

147 139 Oh and OT:
Drudge has an article link to a beaver 'herding' cattle. Yes, in Canada. Why do you ask?

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 12:05 PM (zsHGH)

How is that news? Women leading men around wherever they want isn't exactly a recent phenomenon.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 19, 2017 12:06 PM (9CkBG)

148 145 I've also read that 64 years after the signing of the armistice, the
average South Korean is a full 6" taller than the average North Korean.
It ain't genetics.
***
Ever notice how the people running communist states always get it wrong...but don't worry the ones here in the US will get it right this time!
Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 12:06 PM (eSx+E)

================

"I have never noticed that at all."
-Very smart college student who's struggling with their core classes but acing that gender studies course

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 12:07 PM (mC1ZI)

149 That article is so rage inducing

Posted by: @votermom @vm at April 19, 2017 12:07 PM (hMwEB)

150 OMG.

Am I in the same thread as THE MWR Tea Party Hobbit?????

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 19, 2017 12:07 PM (9CkBG)

151 You don't choose the gonk life, man, - the gonk life chooses you.

Posted by: broseidon being a capitalist pigdog (yknow, working) at April 19, 2017 12:07 PM (oZ6kz)

152 Yes, I remember seeing all those fantastic pictures of the results that the personal trainers at Auschwitz-Birkenau had on the folks who when there to work off a few pounds. Soviet, Khmer Rouge, and Chinese personal trainers were able to duplicate their results too.

Posted by: Strobe at April 19, 2017 12:08 PM (gbWkA)

153 Wait I thought it was the less expensive carb food products that cause our poor to become fat in the alleged food deserts.

And Cuba was no paradise of full grocery items prior to 1990 and the collapse of the Soviet Union,

Posted by: Jack Sock at April 19, 2017 12:08 PM (39cXK)

154 yes, the left is insane. and they're driving the rest of us insane.

almost as many Americans died of drug overdose in 2015 as died in 12 years of Vietnam, according to the DHS.

Reminds me of the over 90% alcoholism rate in the USSR. don't know what it is now.

Gotta go to work and make my 65 dollars. (gross.)

at least Hillary Clinton is not the POTUS!

Posted by: booknlass at April 19, 2017 12:08 PM (8mO0Q)

155 That's nothing. You should try AIDS.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 11:47 AM (mC1ZI)

Lose weight with AYDS? Now there was a marketing campaign, not to mention a tasty dietary supplement.

Posted by: cornbred at April 19, 2017 12:08 PM (1MXcp)

156 People ask, "What are they TEACHING kids in schools these days?"

Well at least I do. Harrumph.

Posted by: Professor Digory Kirke at April 19, 2017 12:08 PM (eXSOZ)

157 >>>"Want Great Abs? Move To North Korea!"

Yeah, a British athlete pretty much said that exact thing.

http://tinyurl.com/kebn38x

Posted by: V the K at April 19, 2017 12:08 PM (O7MnT)

158 Through the benign benevolence of communism, the Cuban people have thrived on weevil rice for decades.

Posted by: Rosie Moleander at April 19, 2017 12:08 PM (vtcmf)

159 She's so far off, she's not even wrong.

http://www.tradingeconomics.com/cuba/death-rate-crude-per-1-000-people-wb-data.html

Looks like the death rate was much lower back in the fully-Soviet-subsidized late 70s than in her idyllic impoverished 1990s, assuming you trust Cuban statistics.

By comparison, the recent accelerated death rate may be related to an aging population. Back in the halcyon 70's, 65+ oldsters were only 6% of the population, while in 2000, they were 10% and are now over 14%. Demographic crunch, anyone?

Posted by: Grouchy Dino at April 19, 2017 12:09 PM (dEnig)

160 lol BC.

Posted by: deplorable Jewells45 at April 19, 2017 12:09 PM (zRZaJ)

161 150
OMG.

Am I in the same thread as THE MWR Tea Party Hobbit?????

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 19, 2017 12:07 PM (9CkBG)

*primp* Why yes. Yes you are.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 12:09 PM (4df7R)

162 That's nothing. You should try AIDS.
___
You know that just might work.

Posted by: Jared from Subway at April 19, 2017 12:09 PM (eSx+E)

163 153 Wait I thought it was the less expensive carb food products that cause our poor to become fat in the alleged food deserts.

And Cuba was no paradise of full grocery items prior to 1990 and the collapse of the Soviet Union,
Posted by: Jack Sock at April 19, 2017 12:08 PM (39cXK)

=================

Bread makes you fat.

Can't get wheat because of disastrous government policy? Well, you won't get fat.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 12:09 PM (mC1ZI)

164 >>She writes like a high school yearbook editor.

"And????"

---Wellesley Journal Editors

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 12:09 PM (NOIQH)

165
64 I'm reading a biography of Gen. Sherman and in it, the author talks about how 'in shape' the soldiers of the March to the Sea were.

Sherman's army ate very well on the march to the sea by picking the surrounding countryside clean of anything edible along the way.It was the people who lived it's path that saw tremendous GAINZZZ in weight loss

Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic at April 19, 2017 12:09 PM (lKyWE)

166 Cosmo also recently did an article about how this woman had an amaaaazzziiinnnggg trick to lose 44 pounds and be her thinnest ever!

She got cancer.

Could I make that up? I could not make that up.

Posted by: alexthechick - rrraaawwwrrr at April 19, 2017 12:09 PM (mf5HN)

167 IMHO, this is a libtard snowflake trying to be "clever" and "edgy."

As per some earlier comments, I think she should take the idea further, and talk to AIDS patients and those undergoing cancer treatment about THEIR weight loss.

Perhaps the key to weight loss is to have healthy people receive radiation and chemotherapy.

As for "walking" to "stay fit" let's just outlaw cars, buses, planes and trains! We'd also crack down on terrorism that way! It's a win all around!

Posted by: shibumi at April 19, 2017 12:10 PM (FkAXz)

168 So what's the big deal about this? It's not like they're spray painting swastickers in the streets!

Posted by: The Incredibly Stupid Sarah Silverman at April 19, 2017 12:10 PM (qJhUV)

169 OT but I swear I've become invisible and inaudible to prospective employers. It's like I don't even exist from the jump or I cease to exist after some initial contact. What the hell is going on? What the hell is so wrong with me?

Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:10 PM (0mRoj)

170 *primp* Why yes. Yes you are.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 12:09 PM (4df7R)

Delivered any good rants lately? Dropped any boxers?

*snicker*

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (9CkBG)

171 The helper we hired in Indonesia lost two children to dysentery before we met her.

Both died within 24-48 hours of getting sick.

I have some fairly unchristian things to say to this writer who has zero idea of what it is like to live life in a permanent state of being 24 hours worth of calories away from starvation.

The poorest Indonesian, and I bet this is true everywhere in the third world, knows the signs of starvation in children. I sure didn't before I moved there, and I bet most Americans don't know them either. Indonesians get something like 70% of the protein in their diet, nationally, from soy. They can't afford meat, period.

So hooray for walking everywhere and being rail thin. I hear heroin addiction is a great way to achieve that look too.

Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (yL25O)

172 I've also read that 64 years after the signing of the armistice, the

average South Korean is a full 6" taller than the average North Korean.

It ain't genetics.

Have you ever looked at pictures of the Nork military? The uniforms are all baggy and ill-fitting. They're made for taller, fitter people.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (4df7R)

173 I can remember when some of the shy 'Ettes first ventured a mild comment. FF to now and it is gratifying to see them wish painful, lingering violence on the enemy. My, my how you have grown...

Posted by: Dave at Buffalo Roam at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (Eyx+b)

174 We have a great program to help you infidels lose about 11 pounds in just one session. More if you have a lot of hair on your head! Sign up now!

Posted by: ISIS at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (eSx+E)

175 Wait, is being fat bad again?

Posted by: goodluckduck at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (yqvys)

176 96: Not a bad comparison! Another inexperienced, skinny twit who lies about his positions to get elected, "learned" at the feet of an idiot and games the system for his own purposes. His ears are smaller though.

Posted by: LASue at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (CLKfs)

177 Had a friend who vacationed in Mexico and got skinny after the trip thanks to salmonella poisoning. Doc said she probably ate dogmeat, which emotionally crushed her because she was such a dog lover.

Maybe I should send that tip along to Cosmo...?

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (NOIQH)

178 Poverty envy.

It's such a weird thing.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 11:46 AM (mC1ZI)
-----------

Like people that complain they have too many choices.

I get that it can be difficult to choose sometimes, but I'd never want less of them.

Posted by: Moron Pundit at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (xeeHA)

179 You should post a Clip of that jerk from sky news that said Cuba and North Korea don't have an obesity problem.

Posted by: Patrick From Ohio at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (dKiJG)

180 Well at least I do. Harrumph.

Posted by: Professor Digory Kirke at April 19, 2017 12:08 PM (eXSOZ)

I WANT A MAGIC WARDROBE PLEASE.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 12:12 PM (4df7R)

181 She got cancer.

Could I make that up? I could not make that up.

Posted by: alexthechick - rrraaawwwrrr at April 19, 2017 12:09 PM (mf5HN)

Well????? Did she fit into the bikini for the summer? Don't leave us hanging...

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 19, 2017 12:12 PM (9CkBG)

182 So . . .can we send Lena Dunham to Cuba? I mean justifiably even from her point of view? amirite?

Posted by: Publius Redux at April 19, 2017 12:12 PM (Fb9aZ)

183 Does Odumbo's daughter intern there? If not, she should. Right in her wheel-house.

Posted by: Strobe at April 19, 2017 12:12 PM (gbWkA)

184 There is a pretty large portion of western culture that believes looking hot and getting laid is the entire purpose of human existence. They have no higher goals, and indeed are unable to imagine any.

Posted by: Christopher R Taylor

It's as if they think Sex and the City is the blueprint for utopia...

Wonder what it says about those people...

(I know I risk starting THAT fight, but sometimes, you gotta.)

Posted by: Brother Cavil, keeper of the Deplorable Unicode Character at April 19, 2017 12:12 PM (9krrF)

185 This is what the Left has in store for us if they ever get back in power. We have too many choices at the supermarket. We need to learn to be content with what the government "gives" us.

Posted by: rickl at April 19, 2017 12:13 PM (xjiRE)

186 Tree bark soup actually prevents tapeworms.

Posted by: Rosie Moleander at April 19, 2017 12:13 PM (vtcmf)

187 Bread makes you fat.
Can't get wheat because of disastrous governmnt policy? Well, you won't get fat.
=====

Let them eat cake.

Posted by: mustbequantum at April 19, 2017 12:13 PM (MIKMs)

188 Wait, is being fat bad again?
--

Being fat is cool if you're an ugly liberal woman who is in entertainment.

Also, if you're an ugly liberal female snowflake in college, it's cool as well.

But for everyone else, fat is bad. Most especially for conservative women.

Posted by: shibumi at April 19, 2017 12:13 PM (FkAXz)

189 @BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk

LOL

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 12:13 PM (zsHGH)

190 Delivered any good rants lately? Dropped any boxers?

*snicker*

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (9CkBG)

1) Rants? No, unfortunately. At least, not here at the HQ.
2) *SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK KICK SMACK*

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 12:13 PM (4df7R)

191 Hognose at Weaponsman has passed. If you are one of his blog readers, please stop by and post a note. A great loss.

Posted by: Uncle Si at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (XHh1P)

192 "Number of SJWs visiting Cuba to use their Yanqui dollars to buy stuff cheap (including underage girls) > 0"

I know a fun place to hang out.

Posted by: Johnny Ola at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (OD2ni)

193 It's like I don't even exist from the jump or I cease to exist after some initial contact
***
Depending on your career, they might have MANY other candidates in the loop. Remember the economy isn't going to recover from Obama for years yet....if we are lucky.

It took me about 6 months before I found my current job (thanks Obama!)

Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (eSx+E)

194 Tree bark soup actually prevents tapeworms.

Also malaria!

Posted by: some cinchona at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (+INtM)

195 169 OT but I swear I've become invisible and inaudible to prospective employers. It's like I don't even exist from the jump or I cease to exist after some initial contact. What the hell is going on? What the hell is so wrong with me?
Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:10 PM (0mRoj)

Insomniac, there are lists of key words that HR departments use to scan resumes. If your resume doesn't have enough of those key words, it never makes it to a human.

You can find lists of relevant key words for your job search and make sure they are included in your resume.

It's an idiotic way to have to do things, but it pays to go along in this instance.

Apologies if I'm telling you stuff you already know, and my prayers for you in your search. I was long term unemployed for pretty much all of 2009-2010. It's hell.

Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (yL25O)

196 My Kulaks, we have nothing to fear with ~~Barack Obama~~ Ioseph Stalin in the White House

Posted by: John Cosmo McCain at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (DpOmP)

197 North Korean, South Korean, American soldiers at the DMZ.

The iconic image:

LINK: http://___ur.com/gallery/aHsayNH

Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (Pqytn)

198 My late BFF died from lung cancer that spread to her spine and brain. And no, she wasn't a smoker.

When she finally died, she was literally skeletal. I've never seen anyone suffer the way she did.

Fuck cancer.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (PY9jH)

199 Insomniac, I hear you, and feel that way right now about the universe. Remember, and you know it's true. you are loved.

I'll be Bach.

(You be Beethoven.)

Posted by: booknlass at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (8mO0Q)

200 What is the love that dare not speak its name?

Gonk love.

I don't know what in blazes a "gonk" is, nor why you would collect it. All I can think of is the Hogan's Heroes episode "Klink vs The Gonculator."

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (X6fMO)

201 Fat is bad!

Stop fatshaming!

Doublethink in action, folks.

Posted by: josephistan at April 19, 2017 12:15 PM (7HtZB)

202 2) *SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK KICK SMACK*

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 12:13 PM (4df7R)

It will always always always ALWAYS be worth it.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 19, 2017 12:15 PM (9CkBG)

203 178
Like people that complain they have too many choices.

I get that it can be difficult to choose sometimes, but I'd never want less of them.
Posted by: Moron Pundit at April 19, 2017 12:11 PM (xeeHA)

=============

Sure that wall of 25 different orange juice varieties can be an eyesore, but at least I know that I can get orange juice.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 12:15 PM (mC1ZI)

204 I am highly amused by the implication that Cuban stores in the Soviet era were chock full of "junk food" and goodies and the people were stuffing their faces,
Nope. Ordinary Cubans were on strict rations and malnutrition was rampant even back then.
It just got worse after the Ruskis pulled their billions.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2017 12:15 PM (0jtPF)

205 So many great apartments opened up in Moscow once the enemies of the state started disappearing.
Thanks Stalin!

Posted by: Hamilton at April 19, 2017 12:15 PM (sCjDS)

206 We need to learn to be content with what the government "gives" us.
---
So for Ms Obama let's see we have 20 lbs of ribs and 13 boxes of hohos.

Oh you Mr Working Class White Male? You get tofu and rice. Enjoy.

Posted by: A future supermarket at April 19, 2017 12:16 PM (eSx+E)

207 16 Only one man in N Korea gets plenty to eat, bet you can't guess who that might be...
Posted by: Colin

The dogs that are used to "execute" people in North Korea are doing okay.

Posted by: nerdygirl at April 19, 2017 12:16 PM (+lVUW)

208 So O' Reilly is out..I guess his next book will be Killing Bill...

Posted by: It's Me donna at April 19, 2017 12:16 PM (O2RFr)

209 Sounds like it was written by Chelsea Clinton. Airhead Communism is such a great idea? No. Just no.

Posted by: Ooolala at April 19, 2017 12:16 PM (6D6ZN)

210 Like people that complain they have too many choices.
--

There are people out there that HATE making decisions. Making any kind of decision, no matter how small, is stressful to them. Basically, they want mommy/wife/boss/ uncle sam to tell them what to do.

Lack of choice is awesome for them, since no decisions are involved.

These people do well in cults, hate freedom and are typically democrats.

Posted by: shibumi at April 19, 2017 12:16 PM (FkAXz)

211 56 For the barely-human hedonist, being fat is worse than being unfaithful. Having excess body hair is a sin worse than theft. Age is worse than selfishness. Their entire worldview is around being young and healthy and having as much sex as possible so you can string enough orgasms together between drugs to avoid thinking about how empty and meaningless your existence is.

And when you start to get old, you freak out and grasp at any anti-aging nonsense, cosmetic surgery, HGH, and anything else you can to avoid being dignified, graceful, and wise.
Posted by: Christopher R Taylor at April 19, 2017 11:49 AM (39g3+)

Sounds an awful lot like the society depicted in Brave New World.

Posted by: rickl at April 19, 2017 12:16 PM (xjiRE)

212 Now the Left Media is going bat shit crazy that we don't announce the exact location of our Carriers? LMAO

But Russia Russia Russia

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (SjImc)

213 One upside of malnourishment-

It's easier to fit into your tiny house.

Posted by: Muldoon, looking on the sunny side at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (lHb9q)

214 I looked up Rosie Mullender, and I did find one pretty good article she wrote, well at least it was fun to read -"15 bikini struggles girls with big boobs will FEEL"

I imagine that's her true area of expertise, probably the reason she's gotten any job she's ever held, and she should stick to what she knows. (It also fits in quite well at Cosmo, of course)

Posted by: President Black Jesus at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (KeRkT)

215 Do a search on the URL in google.com, and then hit the arrow next to the result; "cache" should be an option. That will bring you to the cached version.

Link in URL.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (2lndx)

216 169 OT but I swear I've become invisible and inaudible to prospective employers. It's like I don't even exist from the jump or I cease to exist after some initial contact. What the hell is going on? What the hell is so wrong with me?
Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:10 PM (0mRoj)

You are not young...

Most modern businesses have no idea about how experience can help their business.

And don't even get me started on what happens if you have more experience than the MANAGERS.....

Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (NgKpN)

217 Like people that complain they have too many choices.

"HOW MANY DEODORANTS DO PEOPLE REALLY NEED TO CHOOSE FROM ANYWAY?"

-Bernie Sanders

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (4df7R)

218 In the USSR, weren't there long lines for the handful of items available BEFORE the collapse? She might have investigated why that was the case and what led to the collapse. That doesn't fit the narrative, of course. So no need to look into that.

Posted by: Ed gibbon at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (ZaJM+)

219 I've been using Venezuela as an example to teach the Igno-Daughter of the realities of Communism. To get her attention, I predicted there'd be cannibalism. They've already stolen and eaten animals from the zoo.

Posted by: Ignoramus at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (SIY7D)

220 195 Insomniac, there are lists of key words that HR departments use to scan resumes. If your resume doesn't have enough of those key words, it never makes it to a human.

You can find lists of relevant key words for your job search and make sure they are included in your resume.

It's an idiotic way to have to do things, but it pays to go along in this instance.

Apologies if I'm telling you stuff you already know, and my prayers for you in your search. I was long term unemployed for pretty much all of 2009-2010. It's hell.
Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (yL25O)

================

One trick I heard:

Copy the entire job description in the posting, paste it in white text at the bottom of your resume in tiny font so it doesn't actually add any room.

A computer program that scans the resume will find every key word the employer is most likely looking for.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (mC1ZI)

221 *Sheepishly raises hand*

Um, what the hell is a gonk and why would you want one?

Posted by: joncelli, Longbow Afficianado and Phalangist at April 19, 2017 12:18 PM (RD7QR)

222 OT but I swear I've become invisible and inaudible to prospective employers. It's like I don't even exist from the jump or I cease to exist after some initial contact. What the hell is going on? What the hell is so wrong with me?
Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:10 PM (0mRoj)

It's not always you.

Most companies are never is as big a hurry to hire someone as we are to GET hired. A lot of time the hiring manager is doing other stuff or is not good at delegating or awaiting feedback reports, etc.

Give any prospect two weeks or so, then ping them again. Just a casual-sounding, short email.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 12:18 PM (zsHGH)

223 President Reuven Rivlin described the plight of Christians in the Middle East as a stain on humanity, during a meeting with the head of the Latin Patriarchate in Jerusalem and the Greek Orthodox Patriarch on Wednesday morning in honor of Easter.

The president noted the recent terror attacks against Coptic Christians in Egypt as well as the persecution of Syrian Christians by ISIS and other extremist Islamist groups, and said that Israel would continue to protect its Christian population.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 19, 2017 12:18 PM (SjImc)

224 "HOW MANY DEODORANTS DO PEOPLE REALLY NEED TO CHOOSE FROM ANYWAY?"

-Bernie Sanders
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (4df7R)

"HOW MANY LAKE HOMES DOES ONE NEED ANYWAY???

OH. AT LEAST ONE MORE, I GUESS."

-Bernie

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 19, 2017 12:19 PM (9CkBG)

225 >>So for Ms Obama let's see we have 20 lbs of ribs and 13 boxes of hohos.
Oh you Mr Working Class White Male? You get tofu and rice. Enjoy.

You joke, but Michelle cribbed her school lunch program from Soros' Center for American Progress, and I have no doubt that the significant reduction in protein, and the 3rd world-like recipes for stews (where you're not sure what you're getting vs. American fare with distinct components like cheese slices, meat patties) was intentional. Make the next generation not as big and strong.

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 12:19 PM (NOIQH)

226 Christ, that whole Cosmo website is click bait central.

Posted by: tu3031 at April 19, 2017 12:19 PM (qJhUV)

227 Now the Left Media is concerned the President may not meet with the Pope?

Who gives a fuck

But Russia Russia Russia

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 19, 2017 12:19 PM (SjImc)

228 204/. So true.

Posted by: LASue at April 19, 2017 12:19 PM (CLKfs)

229
Do a search on the URL in google.com, and then hit the arrow next to the
result; "cache" should be an option. That will bring you to the cached
version.

Link in URL.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (2lndx)

Ah-HA! So it was from 2013! Meaning that this whole idea of "communism = weight loss", as so recently espoused by that British twit RE: North Korea, has been a talking point for YEARS.
Wow. Fricking WOW.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit & Vaginassassin, aka Beth at April 19, 2017 12:19 PM (4df7R)

230 There are some choices in life that have a lot of impact, and it makes sense to analyze them heavily.

For the most part though, the choices the average American faces are pretty minor. One thing I try to do now is really consider how important the differences between the options I face are, and if they are small just pick on because you can't go wrong.

Car A and Car B are both rated about the same between different sites and magazines? Pick the one you like to sit in more. Don't know if you should buy this smart phone or that one? Flip a coin...etc.

Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 12:20 PM (eSx+E)

231 These people are the same people who brought you ObamaCare, and they clearly view The Logan's Run Carousel as a goal, not a cautionary tale

Posted by: Michael York at April 19, 2017 12:20 PM (DpOmP)

232 Um, what the hell is a gonk and why would you want one?

Posted by: joncelli, Longbow Afficianado and Phalangist at April 19, 2017 12:18 PM (RD7QR)

RULE #1 OF THE HQ!!!!!!!

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 19, 2017 12:20 PM (9CkBG)

233 Lose weight with AYDS? Now there was a marketing campaign, not to mention a tasty dietary supplement.

Posted by: cornbred
-----

I remember that stuff! Here's the tv spot...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBkVuT5pw1g

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 12:20 PM (8b+oT)

234 Thank G_d nobody is talking about the Hillary diet.

Posted by: Fritz at April 19, 2017 12:20 PM (2Mnv1)

235 OK. So a "gonk," apparently, is an "egg-shaped or spherical furry novelty toy with googly eyes and sometimes small arms and legs."

Ace, in other words.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 19, 2017 12:21 PM (X6fMO)

236 the one's on the margin die.

So. There are actual numerals on the Cuban's margins? Intriguing.

Posted by: Feldwebel Franz, Grammar Nazi at April 19, 2017 12:21 PM (GB7iC)

237 I'm going to walk out of here a Lean, Mean, Fightin' Machine! Ha ha ha ha!

Posted by: Dewey Oxburger, US Army at April 19, 2017 12:21 PM (gbWkA)

238 I do believe that everything OUR Government tells us about nutrition, ends up being wrong though.

Remember when they were pushing Carbs?

Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2017 12:21 PM (NgKpN)

239 >>>Why Cosmo loves the 'Cuban diet', written by that famous political economist Rosie Mullender

I imagine a dystopian future.

Lena Dunham: I'm so glad the Democrats won in 2020!

Rosie Mullender, Nutrition Czar: Lena, honey, I think you need to be exiled to Cuba for a few years. For your own good.

Lena: *sobs*

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at April 19, 2017 12:21 PM (YfK5r)

240 She got cancer.

Could I make that up? I could not make that up.

-----

Now i've got weight loss eyes!

Posted by: Mitt Romeny at April 19, 2017 12:22 PM (oGRue)

241 OT: Jason Chaffetz not seeking reelection in 2018.

Posted by: Independent George at April 19, 2017 12:22 PM (BDZWU)

242 234

And the hot sauce...

Posted by: Ed gibbon at April 19, 2017 12:22 PM (ZaJM+)

243 Want some extra right mish? Plan a trip to Bangkok a test drive a 5 year old girl.

Posted by: Salon at April 19, 2017 12:22 PM (uEeHt)

244 Bye bye stubborn belly fat!!

Posted by: Maria Osmonda-Gonzalez at April 19, 2017 12:22 PM (cCTfp)

245 Rosie Mullender, Nutrition Czar: Lena, honey, I think you need to be exiled to a happy fun camp for a year or so counting global warming flakes in Alaska.

FTFY

Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 12:23 PM (eSx+E)

246 One more of the questions we can no longer answer in the affirmative - Is the Pope Catholic?

Posted by: Strobe at April 19, 2017 12:23 PM (gbWkA)

247 159 She's so far off, she's not even wrong.

http://www.tradingeconomics.com/cuba/death-rate-crude-per-1-000-people-wb-data.html

Looks like the death rate was much lower back in the fully-Soviet-subsidized late 70s than in her idyllic impoverished 1990s, assuming you trust Cuban statistics.

By comparison, the recent accelerated death rate may be related to an aging population. Back in the halcyon 70's, 65+ oldsters were only 6% of the population, while in 2000, they were 10% and are now over 14%. Demographic crunch, anyone?
Posted by: Grouchy Dino at April 19, 2017 12:09 PM (dEnig)
-------------------------------------
Yes.

Also, the Soviets were in charge of the earlier statistics, seeing as they were the experts at disinformation.

And of course they never counted the tens of thousands of deaths in the camps.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 19, 2017 12:24 PM (0jtPF)

248 Ladies, look no further than the Congo for sexual escape and pleasures.

Posted by: Cosmo at April 19, 2017 12:24 PM (uEeHt)

249 OT but I swear I've become invisible and inaudible to prospective employers. It's like I don't even exist from the jump or I cease to exist after some initial contact. What the hell is going on? What the hell is so wrong with me?

---

Can we hear about your diet plan?

Posted by: Cosmo at April 19, 2017 12:24 PM (oGRue)

250 Like people that complain they have too many choices.

"HOW MANY DEODORANTS DO PEOPLE REALLY NEED TO CHOOSE FROM ANYWAY?"

-Bernie Sanders

-----
Here, old codger. Use this one. Now STEP THE FUCK ASIDE!

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 12:24 PM (8b+oT)

251 OK. So a "gonk," apparently, is an "egg-shaped or spherical furry novelty toy with googly eyes and sometimes small arms and legs."

Ace, in other words.
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 19, 2017 12:21 PM (X6fMO)

Literally LOL, and I don't use either term unless it's true.

Posted by: hogmartin at April 19, 2017 12:24 PM (8nWyX)

252 218 In the USSR, weren't there long lines for the handful of items available BEFORE the collapse? She might have investigated why that was the case and what led to the collapse. That doesn't fit the narrative, of course. So no need to look into that.

Reminds me of that old joke that's just heard again on "The Americans"...

I guy walks into a Moscow food store and asks, "Is this the store that doesn't have any meat?"

The proprietor says "No. This is the store that doesn't have any fish. The store that doesn't have any meat is across the street."

Posted by: LASue at April 19, 2017 12:24 PM (CLKfs)

253 You know what worked even better?...the Jap POW Camp diet. Man, those guys shed pounds like crazy.

/disgusted sarc

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2017 12:24 PM (ZO497)

254 >>I do believe that everything OUR Government tells us about nutrition, ends up being wrong though.

IIRC, Obama made a vegan activist (the kind that thinks livestock farts are killing the planet) the head of the group that creates the USDA nutritional guidelines. A vegan telling Americans what they should and shouldn't eat. Sure.

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 12:25 PM (NOIQH)

255 Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:42 AM (PY9jH) ,

Does this genius understand that her participation in "tourism" is going to end up changing Cuba? If she considers what tourism does to a nation bad, then she's part of the problem not the solution.

Posted by: nerdygirl at April 19, 2017 12:25 PM (+lVUW)

256 click bait

expect more of these transparent shit-bombs.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 19, 2017 12:25 PM (GgzGa)

257 It's still in google's cache :

https://tinyurl.com/mwt4p5q

Posted by: corndog at April 19, 2017 12:25 PM (p3eEq)

258 "Not remotely surprising. Lefties sincerely worry
about Cuba being "ruined" by overdevelopment, symbolized by McDonald's.
God forbid the little people live above subsistence levels.

Posted by: gewa76"

Reminds me of when I was in the Peace Corps listening to all the mostly lib volunteers yap about how wonderful the simple life of the rural locals were (i.e. endless backbreaking labor to eke a life of utter poverty and deprivation) It was all so charming seeing a family of six live in straw hut and spend their day washing clothes by hand, hauling water from a stream, planting and harvesting crops manually and eating rice beans, and eggs three times a day! I quickly realized after a few days that their existence was hellish, they would escape it if they could and they were not props for my Third World Adventure. Most of the f**ing clueless libs never figured it out.

Posted by: Ripley at April 19, 2017 12:25 PM (1BQGO)

259 I do believe that everything OUR Government tells us about nutrition, ends up being wrong though.

Milk is bad for you. Butter is bad for you.

Screw that. I like full-strength fresh milk from the local dairy. They make ice cream and butter, too.

And a nice, thick steak, rare, just as God intended.

With a cigar. And scotch.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 19, 2017 12:25 PM (X6fMO)

260 Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at April 19, 2017 12:17 PM (2lndx)

Thanks.

And thanks for explaining how to do it.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 19, 2017 12:26 PM (rF0hx)

261 Yeah, war is also a great weight loss regimen.
Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 11:50 AM (zsHGH)

---

After three tours in Iraq, yes, yes it is.

Posted by: SMFH at April 19, 2017 12:26 PM (jwPAV)

262 A vegan telling Americans what they should and shouldn't eat. Sure.
***
In the 50s Americans ate butter and beef and were pretty thin.

In the 10s they eat pasta and candy and are fat.

Its almost like their is a connection here.

Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 12:26 PM (eSx+E)

263 Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (PY9jH)

Exactly. Thanks to cancer my husband lost those last 5-10 ponds he'd been trying to lose. No. Wait. He *is* 5-10 pounds (it's not like I weighed the ashes after the cremation). Thanks cancer!/s

I wonder if the people who write/say these things have never experienced the death of a loved one. I hope that it is "just" ignorance and immaturity because otherwise they are monsters.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 19, 2017 12:26 PM (sEDyY)

264 You know what worked even better?...the Jap POW Camp diet. Man, those guys shed pounds like crazy.

Be happy in your work!

Posted by: Sessue Hayakawa at April 19, 2017 12:27 PM (qJhUV)

265 Perhaps it's time for The Tapeworm Diet to make a comeback.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at April 19, 2017 12:27 PM (DMUuz)

266 They may have shit-canned the Cuban Diet article, but look what pops up when you put 'Cuba' in their search bar.

"It's (sic) isn't just Beyonce and Jay Z who love Cuba. Cosmo loves it too! Go behind-the-scenes with Cosmo's fashion team on location in sunny Cuba"

http://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/fashion/ a19447/ Cosmo-fashion-team-shoot-in-Havana-Cuba-for-April-issue/

Posted by: V the K at April 19, 2017 12:27 PM (O7MnT)

267
Set Diet Advice to "Smug"

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2017 12:28 PM (v1g1+)

268 expect more of these transparent shit-bombs.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 19, 2017 12:25 PM (GgzGa)

Transparent shit bomb? That would have been welcome when I was wearing that white pantsuit.

:hic:

Posted by: Hilary! at April 19, 2017 12:28 PM (7HtZB)

269 So Bill O'Reilly's really out?

Posted by: squeakywheel at April 19, 2017 12:28 PM (V2tdK)

270 I think those who do hiring and everyone else do a great disservice to job-seekers by telling them they've got a chance at getting a job due to a resume. (although for big corps I guess that's true, although I would guess that even they only start looking at resumes when every other option is exhausted) Every job I ever got that was worth having, I got because of someone I knew who could put my name in. After that, the resume was just the icing that sealed the deal, but it's main function was to not get me kicked out after I'd already made the contacts.

I feel very sorry for most younger people who have grown up never knowing why social organizations and things like belonging to a church with people you actually socialized with was important. This new model of job seeking is lies piled on lies piled on more lies.

Posted by: Tom Servo at April 19, 2017 12:28 PM (KeRkT)

271 OK. So a "gonk," apparently, is an "egg-shaped or spherical furry novelty toy with googly eyes and sometimes small arms and legs."
=====

Evan McMullin, o/k/a Egg McMuffin?

Posted by: mustbequantum at April 19, 2017 12:28 PM (MIKMs)

272 Totalitarian dictatorships have at least one good unintended consequence: weight loss. therefore totalitarian dictatorships are desirable.

Totalitarian dictators know better than the stupid proles what is best for them, therefore totalitarian dictatorships are desirable.

Posted by: Rosie Mullender at April 19, 2017 12:28 PM (YfK5r)

273 Lack of choice is awesome for them, since no decisions are involved.

These people do well in cults, hate freedom and are typically democrats.

---

Two political parties is just too confusing for the serfs

Posted by: buzzsaw90 at April 19, 2017 12:28 PM (oGRue)

274 259 I do believe that everything OUR Government tells us about nutrition, ends up being wrong though.

Milk is bad for you. Butter is bad for you.

Screw that. I like full-strength fresh milk from the local dairy. They make ice cream and butter, too.

And a nice, thick steak, rare, just as God intended.

With a cigar. And scotch.
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 19, 2017 12:25 PM (X6fMO)

Yup.... if God or Evolution didn't want us to eat meat, then why is it so tasty!

Tasty.... tasty.... natural... MEAT....

Its what's for Dinner (TriTip night at the Don's Hacienda).

Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2017 12:29 PM (NgKpN)

275 Could someone kindly explain what the daft bint means by "choosing Daddy over chips?"

Posted by: V the K at April 19, 2017 12:29 PM (O7MnT)

276 What the hell is so wrong with me?
Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:10 PM (0mRoj)

There is nothing wrong with you. At least not that isn't wrong with the rest of us, too.

It was very helpful to me to be a part of some job-seeker groups. Didn't help me find a job at all. Helped a whole lot to know I wasn't crazy. And to keep me getting out of the house, basic grooming, etc.

Nobody will understand you as well as those who are fighting the same fight as you, at the same time. It's a comfort, and you need it when you experience the daily rejection of a long job search. Grace to you.

Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 12:29 PM (yL25O)

277
Is Cosmo indirectly fat shaming?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2017 12:29 PM (v1g1+)

278 So Bill O'Reilly's really out?
Posted by: squeakywheel at April 19, 2017 12:28 PM (V2tdK)

Yeah out...with a 50 million payout...I wish I were out like that?

Sigh

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 19, 2017 12:29 PM (SjImc)

279 I do believe that everything OUR Government tells us about nutrition, ends up being wrong though.

I spent years trying to make the official USDA-approved dietary guidelines work. I was overweight and felt like crap.

I started following GAINZZZZZ HFLC back in July 2016 thanks to Ace, and lost that weight in the space of five months. More energy, felt a lot better, and my heart/blood pressure rebounded to be the best it's been since I was in my twenties.

I ignore the government dietary crap now.

Posted by: Witchdoktor, AKA VA GOP Sucks at April 19, 2017 12:30 PM (tVWQB)

280 wow. O'Reilly out. Hard to believe.

Posted by: deplorable Jewells45 at April 19, 2017 12:30 PM (zRZaJ)

281 They love to praise Cuba for it's single-payer health care.

But never want to talk about how they solved their AIDS crisis.

Posted by: RoyalOil at April 19, 2017 12:30 PM (ZQpd0)

282 @275 - She'd rather have her daddy in her mouth than chips?

I wouldn't be surprised with these sick fucks.

Posted by: Bicentennialguy at April 19, 2017 12:30 PM (cCTfp)

283 222 OT but I swear I've become invisible and inaudible to prospective employers. It's like I don't even exist from the jump or I cease to exist after some initial contact. What the hell is going on? What the hell is so wrong with me?
Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:10 PM (0mRoj)

The HR logjam is almost impossible to break. HR departments are masters of turning state and federal regulations into impenetrable rule-mazes full of flaming hoops to jump through. HR folks mean well but will choke off nearly all hiring and firing if given free reign. Your best bet is to find out who the hiring manager is (if possible) and contact them directly.

Posted by: cornbred at April 19, 2017 12:30 PM (1MXcp)

284 ...fell thru the cracks?
Stop stepping all over my schtick.

Posted by: Ethiopian Jokes from the '80s at April 19, 2017 12:30 PM (Ircze)

285
269 So Bill O'Reilly's really out?
Posted by: squeakywheel at April 19, 2017 12:28 PM (V2tdK)

As what, "questioning"?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) at April 19, 2017 12:31 PM (v1g1+)

286 And Cuba was no paradise of full grocery items prior to 1990 and the collapse of the Soviet Union,
Posted by: Jack Sock at April 19, 2017 12:08 PM (39cXK)

-----------

Yup. That was the part that made me laugh.

Posted by: Soona at April 19, 2017 12:31 PM (Fmupd)

287 >>Could someone kindly explain what the daft bint means by "choosing Daddy over chips?"

Yeah, that one confused me, too.
Maybe it's not using food as an emotional crutch? But I still don't get a grown woman "choosing Daddy"....

Posted by: Lizzy at April 19, 2017 12:31 PM (NOIQH)

288 Meanwhile, on a mega yacht in the South Pacific, Mooch and Barry are chowing down with Orca, Hanks, and Springsteen.

Typical Progs.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at April 19, 2017 11:54 AM (PY9jH)

Why is there never a U-boat when you need one?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at April 19, 2017 12:31 PM (0deF2)

289
276 What the hell is so wrong with me?
Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:10 PM (0mRoj)

There is nothing wrong with you. At least not that isn't wrong with the rest of us, too.

Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 12:29 PM (yL25O)

Please. After all, we ARE Morons.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 19, 2017 12:32 PM (XWkhW)

290 Cosmo had to take down the article to make room for the new one: "Relax! How multicultural rape can be a good thing."

Posted by: Hopped Up On Something at April 19, 2017 12:32 PM (fo0go)

291 Those Chinese have done wonderful things with family planning!

Posted by: Planned Parenthood at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (rUIbB)

292 #278

Yeah out...with a 50 million payout...I wish I were out like that?

Sigh

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 19, 2017 12:29 PM (SjImc)
=================

Does that agreement include a no-competition clause?

Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (Pqytn)

293
OK. So a "gonk," apparently, is an "egg-shaped or spherical furry novelty toy with googly eyes and sometimes small arms and legs."=====

I thought he's a tight end for the Patriots

Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (lKyWE)

294
282 @275 - She'd rather have her daddy in her mouth than chips?

I wouldn't be surprised with these sick fucks.
Posted by: Bicentennialguy at April 19, 2017 12:30 PM (cCTfp)

"You be Pebbles and I'll be Bam-Bam!"

Posted by: The Collected Wisdom of Lena Dunham, Volume I at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (v1g1+)

295 281 They love to praise Cuba for it's single-payer health care.

But never want to talk about how they solved their AIDS crisis.
Posted by: RoyalOil at April 19, 2017 12:30 PM (ZQpd0)

================

Was it through hugs?

I bet it was through hugs.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (mC1ZI)

296 I'm thinking the Conan Tree of Woe diet would keep things interesting. A little buzzard meat now and again would be good for morale.

Posted by: Fritz at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (2Mnv1)

297 289
276 What the hell is so wrong with me?
Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:10 PM (0mRoj)

There is nothing wrong with you. At least not that isn't wrong with the rest of us, too.

Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 12:29 PM (yL25O)

Please. After all, we ARE Morons.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 19, 2017 12:32 PM (XWkhW)

In Soviet Amerika, you don't go Galt.... Galt goes YOU!

Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (NgKpN)

298 An article from The Atlantic on same subject: http://theatln.tc/2osx2cx Did she take from them or di they take from her. This is from April 2013 same time frame as the Cosmo article.

Posted by: Ken James at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (7Te2t)

299 do believe that everything OUR Government tells us about nutrition, ends up being wrong though.

I spent years trying to make the official USDA-approved dietary guidelines work. I was overweight and felt like crap.

I started following GAINZZZZZ HFLC back in July 2016 thanks to Ace, and lost that weight in the space of five months. More energy, felt a lot better, and my heart/blood pressure rebounded to be the best it's been since I was in my twenties.

I ignore the government dietary crap now.

I have always went with "what has worked over the last 10,000 years vs what the government says over the last 50 years."

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (vZ0KM)

300 OK. So a "gonk," apparently, is an "egg-shaped or spherical furry novelty toy with googly eyes and sometimes small arms and legs."=====

I thought he's a tight end for the Patriots

Isn't a gonk that boxy-looking droid in Star Wars....?

Posted by: Witchdoktor, AKA VA GOP Sucks at April 19, 2017 12:34 PM (tVWQB)

301 Don't worry. There are millions of PolPot commies in training in universities right now. This dumb bitch is just the tip of the spear.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 19, 2017 12:34 PM (hRiw+)

302 And bicycles? I guess the spare parts market for the 1951 Studebaker has finally collapsed.

Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 11:57 AM (Pqytn)

Heck no. But American parts suppliers can't ship to Cuba, and Cubans don't have dollars.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at April 19, 2017 12:34 PM (0deF2)

303 For the most part though, the choices the average American faces are pretty minor. One thing I try to do now is really consider how important the differences between the options I face are, and if they are small just pick on because you can't go wrong.

Car A and Car B are both rated about the same between different sites and magazines? Pick the one you like to sit in more. Don't know if you should buy this smart phone or that one? Flip a coin...etc.
Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 12:20 PM (eSx+E)

In a quirk of psychology, people agonize over dead heat decisions, apparently not realizing that if there's rational basis for choosing one over the other, then it doesn't matter which one you choose.

Posted by: Moldylocks at April 19, 2017 12:34 PM (SRKgf)

304 moldy sock off

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at April 19, 2017 12:35 PM (SRKgf)

305 Yeah out...with a 50 million payout...I wish I were out like that?

Sigh

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 19, 2017 12:29 PM (SjImc)
=================

Does that agreement include a no-competition clause?
Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (Pqytn)

For 50 million, the only thing I'd compete against is a warm beach, a cold drink, and a pretty women. But shit, that's just me

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 19, 2017 12:35 PM (SjImc)

306 OK. So a "gonk," apparently, is an "egg-shaped or spherical furry novelty toy with googly eyes and sometimes small arms and legs."=====

I thought he's a tight end for the Patriots
Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic

I thought a gonk was a 24k gold dildo.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 12:35 PM (vZ0KM)

307 299
I have always went with "what has worked over the last 10,000 years vs what the government says over the last 50 years."
Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (vZ0KM)

===============

"But how are you supposed to even survive without experts telling you new and exciting ways to make your life better?

I bet that you'd say that their advice on dieting is probably as good as their advice on how to alleviate poverty, too.

Backwoods, no-nothing..."
-Very smart college student who's struggling with their core classes but acing that gender studies course

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 12:35 PM (mC1ZI)

308 Isn't a gonk that boxy-looking droid in Star Wars....?
Yep. GNK "gonk" droid. Seen briefly in the Lars compound in IV, originally, but made more appearances in the prequels.

Posted by: Sporkatus at April 19, 2017 12:36 PM (eXSOZ)

309 Heck no. But American parts suppliers can't ship to Cuba, and Cubans don't have dollars.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at April 19, 2017 12:34 PM (0deF2)
=============

Edit: "I guess the LOCAL spare parts market [...]"

Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 12:36 PM (Pqytn)

310 I feel very sorry for most younger people who have grown up never knowing why social organizations and things like belonging to a church with people you actually socialized with was important. This new model of job seeking is lies piled on lies piled on more lies.
Posted by: Tom Servo
----------

It's called 'Social Capital', and it is what lends society stability and cohesion.

And, we have almost lost it. The social/fraternal organizations are dying, the bowling leagues, softball leagues, VFW, etc., the things that made a community a Community are slipping away.

In my neighborhood, families come and go after only 5 or years or so. They feel no commitment to the town or the neighbors.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2017 12:36 PM (ZO497)

311 They love to praise Cuba for it's single-payer health care.

But never want to talk about how they solved their AIDS crisis.
Posted by: RoyalOil at April 19, 2017 12:30 PM (ZQpd0)

================

Was it through hugs?

I bet it was through hugs.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (mC1ZI)

Careful with those hugs, chum. When it comes to hugs, geography is important.

Don't for example, be hugging the duodenum. It causes more harm than good. Trust me on this.

Posted by: BurtTC at April 19, 2017 12:36 PM (TOk1P)

312 That tv show you're watching is so inane
*changes channel*

That painting is so bougeoisie, it's no Rothko.
*destroys painting*

Smores??? That's bad for gainz!
*throws out smores*

Political thriller novel? That's not real literature.
*tosses novel in garbage*

Posted by: Rosie Mullender, sauntering through your house at April 19, 2017 12:37 PM (YfK5r)

313 230 There are some choices in life that have a lot of impact, and it makes sense to analyze them heavily.

For the most part though, the choices the average American faces are pretty minor. One thing I try to do now is really consider how important the differences between the options I face are, and if they are small just pick on because you can't go wrong.

Car A and Car B are both rated about the same between different sites and magazines? Pick the one you like to sit in more. Don't know if you should buy this smart phone or that one? Flip a coin...etc.
Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 12:20 PM (eSx+E)

==============

I realized this about smartphones when I worked at T-Mobile.

The $600 Android was as good as the other $600 Android and was just as good as the iPhone. It really came down to a matter of preference on certain aesthetic things.

Once I left the company, I stopped paying any attention to phone news and just buy a generation old top of the line phone. You save a few hundred bucks and have a phone that was considered the absolute best a grand 9 months ago.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at April 19, 2017 12:37 PM (mC1ZI)

314 Also a "gonk" as used in anime fandom refers to small chubby nerdy people, I think.

Posted by: Sporkatus at April 19, 2017 12:38 PM (eXSOZ)

315 OK. So a "gonk," apparently, is an "egg-shaped or spherical furry novelty toy with googly eyes and sometimes small arms and legs."

Ace, in other words.

Posted by: Mary Poppin's Practically Perfect Piercing at April 19, 2017 12:21 PM

A novelty?

Does this mean Ace is, uh, used for 'other' purposes, and comes in a plain brown wrapper?

Posted by: Duncanthrax at April 19, 2017 12:38 PM (DMUuz)

316 I think those who do hiring and everyone else do a great disservice to job-seekers by telling them they've got a chance at getting a job due to a resume. (although for big corps I guess that's true, although I would guess that even they only start looking at resumes when every other option is exhausted) Every job I ever got that was worth having, I got because of someone I knew who could put my name in. After that, the resume was just the icing that sealed the deal, but it's main function was to not get me kicked out after I'd already made the contacts.

I feel very sorry for most younger people who have grown up never knowing why social organizations and things like belonging to a church with people you actually socialized with was important. This new model of job seeking is lies piled on lies piled on more lies.
Posted by: Tom Servo at April 19, 2017 12:28 PM (KeRkT)

A really good resume only helps you get an interview.

Then you have to kick ass in the interview.

But, yeah, most jobs go to people you know. The Tech industry in Seattle can be a surprisingly small town in ways. And you may well bump into the same people time and again.

For Tech work, contract/vendor work is one of the best ways to get experience and make those job connections for future employment.

Hopefully that also works for you in Florida, Insomniac.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at April 19, 2017 12:38 PM (zsHGH)

317
You know who else put his countrymen on a healthier, albeit restricted calorie diet? That's right.

Posted by: you know you know at April 19, 2017 12:38 PM (v1g1+)

318 Guees Bill O is out at Fox. Per Drudge.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at April 19, 2017 12:38 PM (hRiw+)

319 >>Could someone kindly explain what the daft bint means by "choosing Daddy over chips?"
-----
Potato chips or chocolate chips? Choosing to have Daddy sit on a tube of cookie dough? Why? So you won't want to eat it?

WHY WRITE YOU SO SHIT?!?!

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 12:38 PM (8b+oT)

320 this all makes perfect sense. to a fucking zombie. they don't need money or food either. brain diarrhea.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at April 19, 2017 12:39 PM (xlfIr)

321 Back at #197, the miracle of cut-paste screwed up the url. It's an ___ur.com link.

I love that pic. I can imagine how the American and the South Korean set that up.

Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 12:39 PM (Pqytn)

322 Nothing like a Studie powered by a Russian tractor engine to evoke a sense of nostalgia.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at April 19, 2017 12:39 PM (ZO497)

323 Having excess body hair is a sin worse than theft.
***
Have you seen the average SJW? Male or female?

Posted by: 18-1 at April 19, 2017 12:00 PM (eSx+E)

Heh. Hey, Moldylocks! Pick up the white courtesy phone.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at April 19, 2017 12:39 PM (0deF2)

324 An article from The Atlantic on same subject: http://theatln.tc/2osx2cx Did she take from them or did they take from her? This is from April 2013 same time frame as the Cosmo article.

Posted by: Ken James at April 19, 2017 12:40 PM (7Te2t)

325 Ouch. Or maybe that's a no-go link. In that case, sorry.

Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 12:40 PM (Pqytn)

326 Does this mean Ace is, uh, used for 'other' purposes, and comes in a plain brown wrapper?

When there's no jerk sock around, sure, I guess.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 19, 2017 12:40 PM (X6fMO)

327 George Soros should take a holiday in Venezuela. He could stand to lose a few.

Posted by: Rosie Mullender at April 19, 2017 12:40 PM (YfK5r)

328 318; something tells me ole billy will be back. somewhere. the blowhard has his peeps. the "folks" love that tool.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at April 19, 2017 12:41 PM (xlfIr)

329 Been to Cuba. It is about as socialist as Las Vegas now. Everybody's hawking something (cigars, rum, sex, etc). You can't even use the men's room without paying. It is basically a dictatorship funded by American and European hard currency.

Curiously there are very few public pictures or representations of Raul "Shemp" Castro. Every picture or mural is Che or Fidel (and even those aren't as common as you'd think.

Posted by: Ernie McCracken at April 19, 2017 12:41 PM (DKoTx)

330 You know who else put his countrymen on a healthier, albeit restricted calorie diet? That's right.

At least FDR allowed them Victory Gardens.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 12:42 PM (vZ0KM)

331 195 169 OT but I swear I've become invisible and inaudible to prospective employers. It's like I don't even exist from the jump or I cease to exist after some initial contact. What the hell is going on? What the hell is so wrong with me?
Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:10 PM (0mRoj)

Insomniac, there are lists of key words that HR departments use to scan resumes. If your resume doesn't have enough of those key words, it never makes it to a human.

You can find lists of relevant key words for your job search and make sure they are included in your resume.

It's an idiotic way to have to do things, but it pays to go along in this instance.

Apologies if I'm telling you stuff you already know, and my prayers for you in your search. I was long term unemployed for pretty much all of 2009-2010. It's hell.
Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (yL25O)

It's fine. I had my r�sum� professionally revamped just for that keyword bullshit and it still isn't getting me anywhere. And fact the economy is still shit doesn't help. Thanks for the prayers. You know firsthand how shitty this all is.

Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:42 PM (0mRoj)

332 Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 12:39 PM (Pqytn)

Pixy hates the first three letters of that site in lower case, so it wasn't any of your doing.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 19, 2017 12:42 PM (sEDyY)

333 The Left is in love with ignorance, misery, and fascism. They have never met a dictator or 3rd world hellhole that they cannot wax rhapsodical about for hours without end.

For example:

* Palestine, where they sit around and nurse their grievances and foment terror and mayhem is wonderful, while productive and fairly egalitarian Israel is anathema.
* Venezuela, where socialism/fascism is bought with petro-dollars. Now normally, petro dollars are the ickiest things on the planet UNLESS they fund a socialist dictatorship or a brutal theocracy.
* Cuba, they love them some Cuba even with Uncle Fidel dead. Thank goodness they still have Uncle Raul to worship.

etc.

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes, who is now luxuriating in vast pools of winning! at April 19, 2017 12:42 PM (kXoT0)

334 249 OT but I swear I've become invisible and inaudible to prospective employers. It's like I don't even exist from the jump or I cease to exist after some initial contact. What the hell is going on? What the hell is so wrong with me?

----------------

Perhaps you're aiming too high for a starting position. Perhaps your skills aren't that much in demand and you need to develop new ones. Perhaps you need to move where jobs are more available. Any number of things are under your direct personal control.

Posted by: Soona at April 19, 2017 12:42 PM (Fmupd)

335 I buy clothes at the "Stork&Hippo" and the salesmen there are always considerate when you drop a size. They said it happens due to ill health a lot more than it does due to health improvement.
"I'm on the cancer diet" is just fine black humor if you're going through it. To seriously present that as a positive shows a sickness much worse than cancer.

Posted by: Ethiopian Jokes from the '80s at April 19, 2017 12:43 PM (Ircze)

336 >>That tv show you're watching is so inane

But I like 'The 100.'

Posted by: V the K at April 19, 2017 12:43 PM (O7MnT)

337 You can find lists of relevant key words for your job search and make sure they are included in your resume.

It's an idiotic way to have to do things, but it pays to go along in this instance.

Apologies if I'm telling you stuff you already know, and my prayers for you in your search. I was long term unemployed for pretty much all of 2009-2010. It's hell.
Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 12:14 PM (yL25O)

================

One trick I heard:

Copy the entire job description in the posting, paste it in white text at the bottom of your resume in tiny font so it doesn't actually add any room.

A computer program that scans the resume will find every key word the employer is most likely looking for.
---

These are both excellent ideas

Posted by: shibumi at April 19, 2017 12:43 PM (FkAXz)

338 An article from The Atlantic on same subject:
http://theatln.tc/2osx2cx Did she take from them or did they take from
her? This is from April 2013 same time frame as the Cosmo article.

Posted by: Ken James
----
Add plagiarizing to her obnoxious list of things she's really into.

Posted by: Dang at April 19, 2017 12:43 PM (8b+oT)

339 249 OT but I swear I've become invisible and inaudible to prospective employers. It's like I don't even exist from the jump or I cease to exist after some initial contact. What the hell is going on? What the hell is so wrong with me?

---

Can we hear about your diet plan?
Posted by: Cosmo at April 19, 2017 12:24 PM (oGRue)

I barely eat. Lost 30 pounds.

Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:43 PM (0mRoj)

340 #332

Thanks, Polli.

Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 12:44 PM (Pqytn)

341 I buy clothes at the "Stork&Hippo" and the salesmen there are always considerate when you drop a size. They said it happens due to ill health a lot more than it does due to health improvement.
"I'm on the cancer diet" is just fine black humor if you're going through it. To seriously present that as a positive shows a sickness much worse than cancer.
Posted by: Ethiopian Jokes

Meth Diet, (loss of teeth), is another one they are quite fond of.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 19, 2017 12:45 PM (vZ0KM)

342 Noob

Posted by: CSMBigBird at April 19, 2017 12:46 PM (jsWA8)

343 All media reads like The Onion to me these days.

Posted by: sock_rat_eez, they are gaslighting us 24/7 at April 19, 2017 12:46 PM (KGH7Z)

344 I feel very sorry for most younger people who have grown up never knowing why social organizations and things like belonging to a church with people you actually socialized with was important. This new model of job seeking is lies piled on lies piled on more lies.
Posted by: Tom Servo at April 19, 2017 12:28 PM (KeRkT)

I'm GenX and it's still been lie after lie. Go to college! Go to law school! Keep your head down and work hard, and everything works out!

Bull. Shit.

Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:46 PM (0mRoj)

345 Having excess body hair is a sin worse than theft.
=====

Unironically, one of the signs of malnutrition or anorexia is body hair.

Posted by: mustbequantum at April 19, 2017 12:46 PM (MIKMs)

346 Meth Diet, (loss of teeth), is another one they are quite fond of.
==============

I've heard oral surgeons refer to rows of rotten teeth as "Mountain Dew Mouth".

Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 12:47 PM (Pqytn)

347
Does that agreement include a no-competition clause?
Posted by: mrp at April 19, 2017 12:33 PM (Pqytn)

For 50 million, the only thing I'd compete against is a warm beach, a cold drink, and a pretty women. But shit, that's just me
Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 19, 2017 12:35 PM (SjImc)

Shit..... a couple of Russian or Ukrainian Hot Women... good contracts so no being sued later...

and then.... live the life of... Riley?

Posted by: Don Q. at April 19, 2017 12:47 PM (NgKpN)

348 It was very helpful to me to be a part of some job-seeker groups. Didn't help me find a job at all. Helped a whole lot to know I wasn't crazy. And to keep me getting out of the house, basic grooming, etc.

How do I find such a group? I'm not much of a joiner but I'm also increasingly desperate.

Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:48 PM (0mRoj)

349 The NKs have created a new race of people in the last 60 years. Men in NK are about 4" shorter and 40 lbs lighters than average South Korean

Posted by: rhennigan at April 19, 2017 12:49 PM (bmkS9)

350 How do I find such a group? I'm not much of a joiner but I'm also increasingly desperate.
Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:48 PM (0mRoj)

Try your library.

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Stiletto Corsettes, who is now luxuriating in vast pools of winning! at April 19, 2017 12:49 PM (kXoT0)

351 I just figure out what disturbed me about Rosie Mullender's comment. Privation is the main argument for domestic entitlements, foreign aid, and immigration.

But Rosie is arguing that privation is good. Therefore, we shouldn't be doing anything to stop it.

Liberals make me dizzy.

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at April 19, 2017 12:52 PM (YfK5r)

352 I just *figured* gah

Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at April 19, 2017 12:53 PM (YfK5r)

353 How do I find such a group? I'm not much of a joiner but I'm also increasingly desperate.
Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:48 PM (0mRoj)

Several churches in my area had them at the height of the downturn in 2010. Not sure if they are as prevalent anymore.

Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 12:54 PM (yL25O)

354 353 How do I find such a group? I'm not much of a joiner but I'm also increasingly desperate.
Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 12:48 PM (0mRoj)

Several churches in my area had them at the height of the downturn in 2010. Not sure if they are as prevalent anymore.
Posted by: TexasDan at April 19, 2017 12:54 PM (yL25O)

To the Internetz!

Posted by: Insomniac at April 19, 2017 01:04 PM (0mRoj)

355 google cache of article:

https://goo.gl/SwB75p

Posted by: mickj at April 19, 2017 01:07 PM (2Uz4B)

356 It's nice to see the Chavezistas engaged in such an ambitious fitness program, with a half million armed "trainers" dedicated to helping "Make Venezuela thin again!"

Posted by: Kasper Hauser at April 19, 2017 01:12 PM (HqpV0)

357 I think someone should open up a fat farm for rich progressives modeled on the Cuban diet and average NK working day. They could pick rice all day (but couldn't eat it) and then they would get with a roasted rat and water soup (nicely seasoned with Cuban spices) for dinner. No AC of course, so they could sweat off more fat trying to sleep at night.

It would melt the weight off in no time.

Posted by: Donna and V. (sans ampersands at the present time) at April 19, 2017 02:00 PM (s7vJs)

358 Can't tell you how much my awesome wife is raging over this shit.
She grew up under communism, Polish style, and says "yeah, it's called malnutrition, assholes." All the things kids, especially, deal with on the commie diet... dentists today who ask her about indentations in her teeth where there are no cavities, and she explains that childhood malnutrition from not having food other than bread and butter for a week at a time, over and over again....
Cuck Fosmo.

Posted by: malaking baboy at April 19, 2017 03:34 PM (RivyF)

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