Archprog Steven Colbert Makes Fun of Mike Pence's Invocation of Faith By Making a Really Hack, Really Cheap Gay Joke

Mike Pence says it's good to spend time on one's knees -- praying for wisdom, obviously -- and super-funny, super-innovative Stephen Colbert immediately makes a gay joke unworthy of a 7th grade class clown.

Listen: Political correctness is not about what can be said and what can't be said.

It is and always has been about who can say something, and who cannot.

It's not about outlawing words: It's about outlawing people.

Posted by: Ace at 07:12 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 oh no

Posted by: micky at October 05, 2016 07:14 PM (o5vMc)

2 And make no mistake, we are the ones being outlawed.

Posted by: the deplorable sock_rat_eez, stay calm and carry on at October 05, 2016 07:14 PM (Z8DIA)

3 I AM COCKSUCKER

Posted by: ACE'S SISTER at October 05, 2016 07:15 PM (XzRw1)

4 To make things worse:

Colbert is supposed to be a devoit Catholic. He's putting partisan politics above his supposed actual religion in favor of his real religion: progressivism.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at October 05, 2016 07:16 PM (Cqj/H)

5 "Gay marriage" is not really marriage....or a family unit...

And there are only 2 genders...

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at October 05, 2016 07:16 PM (n7ncP)

6 Fuck Steven Colbert . . . .

. . . .

in the ass.

Posted by: Sharkman at October 05, 2016 07:17 PM (GMhwZ)

7 Colbert is not funny. Never has been.

Posted by: Joe Mama at October 05, 2016 07:18 PM (yPugS)

8 *Devout

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at October 05, 2016 07:18 PM (Cqj/H)

9 So I come back and see there's a new thread. I go back to the main page and sure enough.
Only it wasn't this one. It was the last one.
Only two comments here when I started typing this.
The over/under on how many theft is now?
Mmmm, 27.

Posted by: teej at October 05, 2016 07:18 PM (qjzL4)

10 Colbert is proof liberals are not cool at all.

Clapter comedy is for tightassed scolds.

Posted by: eleven at October 05, 2016 07:19 PM (qUNWi)

11 If That Colbert guy was ever funny in his entire career, I must have missed it.

He tries for the smug, in-crowd non-humor that relies on the audience needing to show each other that they "get it." Jon Stewart was famous for this shtick, but Colbert just comes off like a self-impressed douche.

Posted by: Cicero -- Profoundly Deplorable But Pretty Dependable at October 05, 2016 07:19 PM (8ZskC)

12 That's NOT funny.

Posted by: Fizbo the Clown at October 05, 2016 07:19 PM (HgMAr)

13 Hooting apes show their approval.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at October 05, 2016 07:19 PM (IqV8l)

14 The next generation will be known as the "Owmyballs" generation.

Posted by: freaked at October 05, 2016 07:19 PM (BO/km)

15 Whoa. Did no one tell the others?

Posted by: teej at October 05, 2016 07:19 PM (qjzL4)

16 Catholics (and I am one) are becoming one of my least favorites.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at October 05, 2016 07:20 PM (ODkrH)

17 Meh. The joke was funny. I don't see anything wrong with it. Do people want to try to press PC totalitarianism on Colbert as some sort of defense of free speech?

And this tweet from this polimath guy is kind of stupid:

Watch @StephenAtHome mock a Muslim politician for "getting on his knees" 5 times a day to audience guffaws
I feel sick thinking about it

muzzies don't get on their knees 5 times a day, they bury their face in the dirt 5 times a day ... and that is certainly something that should be mocked, because it shows what islam is all about - making an individual realize that he isn't worth shit and that his only value is throwing his life away in a mad pursuit of muslim state power everywhere and control over everyone.

I really don't like when people try to be overly PC against lefties as some sort of attack on PC. That's just a race to the bottom ... and the bottom is exactly where the left wants to drag us all, to begin with.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 05, 2016 07:20 PM (zc3Db)

18 It's not about outlawing words: It's about outlawing people.

Posted by: Ace at 07:12 PM

And naughty green cartoon frogs.

*sniff*

Posted by: Pepe, The Irredeemable at October 05, 2016 07:20 PM (xTFXi)

19 Colbert is not even CLOSE to funny. Ever.

He's got that "please kick me up the ass" or "shoe me in the nuts" look about him.

Posted by: melodicmetal at October 05, 2016 07:21 PM (ficNf)

20 I would watch Ow My Balls.

Stupid people in pain amuses me.

Posted by: eleven at October 05, 2016 07:21 PM (qUNWi)

21

"ya gotta know when to hold'm"
"Know when to blow them"
"Know when to turn away"
"Know when to run."

Posted by: Hobart at October 05, 2016 07:21 PM (7vFaV)

22 Colbert sucks cocks by choice.

Posted by: Insomniac - Irredeemably Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:22 PM (0mRoj)

23 Colbert is Catholic like Nancy Pelosi is Catholic: it's apparently nothing more than a cudgel to use when you want to assert moral authority for a progressive cause.

Posted by: Kensington at October 05, 2016 07:22 PM (7Kbxu)

24 colbert is a salad tosser. about as funny as a rampant yeast infection on a twenty dollar hooker.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 05, 2016 07:23 PM (KP5rU)

25 Can we make jokes now about guys who have deformed ears?

Just checking.

Colbert looks like some schoolyard bully jerked his prissy ass around a time or three by That One Ear.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:23 PM (1ZOkK)

26 No doubt Colbert has spent plenty of time on his knees.

Posted by: freaked, buns up and waiting at October 05, 2016 07:24 PM (BO/km)

27 What can I say...homo jokes are funny.

Posted by: Steven Colbert at October 05, 2016 07:24 PM (wcSGs)

28 Back in your basket, let your cultural betters dictate the conversation.

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at October 05, 2016 07:24 PM (7N6ox)

29 Jane are you riden the storm out?

Posted by: freaked, buns up and waiting at October 05, 2016 07:24 PM (BO/km)

30 Steven Colbert? Never heard of him.

Did he make a similar joke about mohammedians prostrating themselves five times a day? No? Well, I guess none of them are running for Veep, so that's ok.

F*ck that guy.

Posted by: the deplorable chiefjaybob, who hates everyone at October 05, 2016 07:25 PM (G2Sc9)

31 25 Can we make jokes now about guys who have deformed ears?

Go right ahead. Just be ready for an IRS audit.

Posted by: TFG at October 05, 2016 07:25 PM (0mRoj)

32
It is and always has been about who can say something, and who cannot.

It's not about outlawing words: It's about outlawing people.
============================================

That's a very good way to put it, ace.

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 07:25 PM (dFi94)

33 Colbert is about as funny as Amy Schumer, Not

Posted by: The Jackhole at October 05, 2016 07:25 PM (M+Lyo)

34 4 To make things worse:

Colbert is supposed to be a devoit Catholic. He's putting partisan politics above his supposed actual religion in favor of his real religion: progressivism.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at October 05, 2016 07:16 PM (Cqj/H)

Usually Progrssivism is the first and strongest religion for Libs. Being Catholic is not even a close second.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'it all tastes like chicken' at October 05, 2016 07:25 PM (B+MYz)

35 Hmmm.

Posted by: Amy Schumer at October 05, 2016 07:25 PM (GX63o)

36 I don't find Colbert at all funny,

But if he happened to get the living shit kicked out of him, I'd probably laugh.

Posted by: seamrog at October 05, 2016 07:26 PM (OsjI9)

37 Not far from being told that Liberals can't be haters!

Posted by: its all good at October 05, 2016 07:26 PM (bsDXW)

38 I can make fag jokes because my audience and I really love and respect fags. That's what makes us so superior to knuckle-dragging conservatives.

Posted by: Steven Colbert at October 05, 2016 07:26 PM (8ZskC)

39 Colbert.....not funny.

Don Rickles....funny.

How or why that idiot is still on TV is one of life's bigger mysteries.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at October 05, 2016 07:26 PM (ej1L0)

40 I remember the good ole days when Hollywood funny people would kill themselves much more regularly....good times....

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at October 05, 2016 07:26 PM (n7ncP)

41 Listen: Political correctness is not about what can be said and what can't be said.

It is and always has been about who can say something, and who cannot.

It's not about outlawing words: It's about outlawing people.

Correctamundo.

Posted by: Insomniac - Irredeemably Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:26 PM (0mRoj)

42 4 To make things worse:

Colbert is supposed to be a devoit Catholic. He's putting partisan politics above his supposed actual religion in favor of his real religion: progressivism.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison at October 05, 2016 07:16 PM (Cqj/H)

Anyone who claims he is "devout" Catholic, or any other denomination, is guilty of pride, so they're not devout.

Posted by: josephistan at October 05, 2016 07:27 PM (7qAYi)

43 Jane are you riden the storm out?

Posted by: freaked, buns up and waiting at October 05, 2016 07:24 PM (BO/km)

So far. Husband is bringing home his company generator tomorrow (to keep the refrigerators and freezers running.)

Things may get sportier than Hermine, and if so, we're prepared to move slightly inland.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:27 PM (1ZOkK)

44 What's crumpled, distorted , misshapen and totally fkd up looking?

Steven Colbert's ear!

HAHAHA

HAHAHA

HAHA

HA

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:27 PM (zu88C)

45 if colbert mumbles something on the late show does it make a sound? and, to whom?

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 05, 2016 07:27 PM (KP5rU)

46 Outlaw this mother fucker

*grabs brain*

You thought I was going to grab my Dick didn't you?

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at October 05, 2016 07:27 PM (6Ll1u)

47 Well, it's time:

Cool Facts About Mike Pence:

The locals in Tijuana recount a time when a man came in, paid approximately the amount asked for, and acted with decorum. Mike Pence called it "Family Vacation: 2013"

Dogs Fear Vacuum Cleaners. Mike Pence can repair vacuum cleaners. And work with dogs on positive reinforcement for behavioral issues.

Every year for the past 30 years Mike Pence has said grace before eating the turkey that was pardoned by the President but killed by Dick Cheney.

Mike Pence's immune system is not vestigial, but he takes extra Vitamin C.

Mike Pence once wore out a rug praying for his enemies. He paid for the reweaving.

Mike Pence wipes his shoes both front to back and side to side on the doormat before entering a home.

His handshake is firm, but not too firm, and is neither clammy or overheated. Nor does it last too long.

Mike Pence is comfortable hugging women in greeting, and only marginally less so hugging men.

Mike Pence knows the difference between an aperitif and a digestif

Mike Pence once caught himself as he began pandering to a crowd. He promptly apologized and restated his deeply held position.

-

Posted by: BumperStickerist at October 05, 2016 07:27 PM (uhftQ)

48 42 4 To make things worse:

Colbert is supposed to be a devoit Catholic. He's putting partisan politics above his supposed actual religion in favor of his real religion: progressivism.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison at October 05, 2016 07:16 PM (Cqj/H)

Anyone who claims he is "devout" Catholic, or any other denomination, is guilty of pride, so they're not devout.
Posted by: josephistan at October 05, 2016 07:27 PM (7qAYi)

Nancy "partial birth abortion is sacred ground" Pelosi.

Posted by: Insomniac - Irredeemably Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:27 PM (0mRoj)

49 You're not allowed to make a gay joke. But he is. See he's a good little progressive and actually thinks the right way so he can say "Fags and queers!" and use it as an insult joke because of that.

Posted by: buzzion at October 05, 2016 07:27 PM (z/Ubi)

50 20 I would watch Ow My Balls.

Stupid people in pain amuses me.
Posted by: eleven at October 05, 2016 07:21 PM (qUNWi)

Can we start with Colbert?

Posted by: josephistan at October 05, 2016 07:28 PM (7qAYi)

51 He said what?

Posted by: Barbed Cock of Satan at October 05, 2016 07:28 PM (B+MYz)

52 Colbert is Catholic like Nancy Pelosi is Catholic:
it's apparently nothing more than a cudgel to use when you want to
assert moral authority for a progressive cause.

Posted by: Kensington at October 05, 2016 07:22 PM

And Tim Kaine, Joe Biden, John Kerry, Kathleen Sebelius...

Posted by: huerfano at October 05, 2016 07:28 PM (jkkMG)

53 Remember how Colbert was supposed to stop this stuff when going to CBS and appeal to all Americans and not just his hardcore liberal clappter fans.

Posted by: buzzion at October 05, 2016 07:29 PM (z/Ubi)

54 Well good luck Jane. Hopefully it will just be a lot of rain. But be careful.

Posted by: freaked, buns up and waiting at October 05, 2016 07:29 PM (BO/km)

55 "To make things worse:

Colbert is supposed to be a devoit Catholic. He's putting partisan politics above his supposed actual religion in favor of his real religion: progressivism."

-------

He's a Catholic the same way he is a conservative - ironically.

No devout Catholic comedian would have behaved as he did and does. It is possible to be both but the jokes would be completely different and the targets of them different.

Posted by: Decaf at October 05, 2016 07:30 PM (8zHLN)

56 I'm sure these "good Catholics" will be able to answer the last time they prayed the rosary. Or when to confession. Or even went to Mass.

Posted by: Colorado Alex in Exile at October 05, 2016 07:30 PM (hzV0p)

57 crass joke uttered by an ass.

Posted by: concrete girl at October 05, 2016 07:30 PM (Yntgb)

58 I hate time on my knees because it's quickly followed by a face-plant!

Posted by: Hillary! at October 05, 2016 07:30 PM (J3phO)

59 Why would a devout Catholic mock someone for praying? I don't get it.

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 07:31 PM (dFi94)

60 Liberalism, for the Left, always triumphs over everything else--religion, morality, honesty, the lot. This should surprise no one.

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at October 05, 2016 07:31 PM (AroJD)

61 Steven, that's not even a decent cauliflower ear.
It's an oyster ear!

Posted by: Fizbo the Clown at October 05, 2016 07:31 PM (HgMAr)

62 the laughter is taped, there is no way anyone whould laugh at that flat, stupid thing

Posted by: runner at October 05, 2016 07:31 PM (c6/9Q)

63
Well good luck Jane. Hopefully it will just be a lot of rain. But be careful.

Posted by: freaked, buns up and waiting at October 05, 2016 07:29 PM (BO/km)

Well, we're going to have at least TS force winds, and more likely hurricane force winds of up to 60. Concern is the drenching rain an storm surge.

Prayers, please. We're very well prepared and husband is talking with people Who Know Things. Forget the racist idiots in our county commission.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:31 PM (1ZOkK)

64 who does this mewling quim have pictures of?

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 05, 2016 07:32 PM (KP5rU)

65 just another coward liberal hiding behind "edgy humor".

Posted by: seamrog at October 05, 2016 07:32 PM (OsjI9)

66 Colbert looks like some schoolyard bully jerked his prissy ass around a time or three by That One Ear.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable

That bully knew how to hold his licker.

Posted by: Joe Mama at October 05, 2016 07:32 PM (yPugS)

67 Next he'll be making fun of the darkies.

Posted by: Fizbo the Clown at October 05, 2016 07:33 PM (HgMAr)

68 "Catholics (and I am one) are becoming one of my least favorites.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at October 05, 2016 07:20 PM (ODkrH)"

---------

Same here. It seems every public Catholic is a heretic and a blasphemer. Their cynical use of the faith is downright evil.

Posted by: Decaf at October 05, 2016 07:33 PM (8zHLN)

69 I'm waiting for Colbert to make jokes about clowns.

And the violent backlash.

Pies everywhere.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:34 PM (1ZOkK)

70 The man's show is 5th among the three late night shows. The two late-late shows have more viewers.

Posted by: josephistan at October 05, 2016 07:34 PM (7qAYi)

71 The man's show is 5th among the three late night shows. The two late-late shows have more viewers.

Posted by: josephistan at October 05, 2016 07:34 PM (7qAYi)

What does he care? They're still paying him like $10 million a year.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 05, 2016 07:35 PM (zc3Db)

72
No devout Catholic comedian would have behaved as he did and does.

He's probably of the liberation theology type.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at October 05, 2016 07:35 PM (IqV8l)

73 Nice one Jane...

Posted by: Cannibal Bob "wife gave him the cold shouder' at October 05, 2016 07:36 PM (B+MYz)

74
I'm waiting for Colbert to make jokes about clowns.
And the violent backlash.
Pies everywhere.
Posted by: Jane D'oh

They'd cream the guy!

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at October 05, 2016 07:37 PM (IqV8l)

75 Colbert is about as funny as Amy Schumer, Not.

Booyah! Nailed it!

Wait...what?

Posted by: Amy Schumer at October 05, 2016 07:37 PM (/kYMn)

76 Shouder? Wtf?

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:37 PM (B+MYz)

77 Clown sighting: Colbert.

Posted by: Unsure if deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:37 PM (Eynls)

78 I'm waiting for Colbert to make jokes about clowns.
And the violent backlash.
Pies everywhere.
Posted by: Jane D'oh

They'd cream the guy!
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at October 05, 2016 07:37 PM (IqV8l)

No, I just blew a seal.

Posted by: Just the Punchline at October 05, 2016 07:38 PM (7qAYi)

79 It seems every public Catholic is a heretic and a blasphemer. Their cynical use of the faith is downright evil.

Posted by: Decaf at October 05, 2016 07:33 PM (8zHLN)
============================================

Yeah, there's some bad stuff going on in the spiritual realm. Sobering to think that people who once had faith have subverted it or turned their back on it for - a laugh? a place at the table?

Gird your loins.

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 07:38 PM (dFi94)

80 Colbert is the political "comedy" equivalent of a minstrel show.
Look at me ! Look at me! I'm a dorky, white, conservative-looking guy! But I'm not really a conservative! But I sure am a dorky conservative-looking white guy! Yuk yuk yuk.
They will look back on Ow My Balls as Shakespeare.

Posted by: Xnycpeasant at October 05, 2016 07:38 PM (ZAlOu)

81 I think Pence threw that line out there knowing exactly what the late night douches would do with it.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at October 05, 2016 07:39 PM (ODkrH)

82 These assholes will be lucky if they only get the snot beat out of them.

Posted by: Eromero at October 05, 2016 07:39 PM (zLDYs)

83 Oh boy....Punchline...And deep too.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:39 PM (B+MYz)

84 "Anyone who claims he is "devout" Catholic, or any other denomination, is guilty of pride, so they're not devout."

-------

Yes, that sort of declaration is very pharisaic, see how holy I am.

Posted by: Decaf at October 05, 2016 07:39 PM (8zHLN)

85 Just so you guys won't be shocked, I've supplied our home with babies I harvested from a local daycare.

If we run low on food during the hurricane.....

Someone tell Shep.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:40 PM (1ZOkK)

86 I'll bet Colbert and Tim Kaine are yucking it up about this joke, while they're waiting in line for the confessional.

Posted by: dissent555 at October 05, 2016 07:40 PM (GdgAM)

87 Maybe evolution has occurred and no one has noticed.

Liberal democrats are actually a separate species.

homo infantes.

Posted by: seamrog at October 05, 2016 07:40 PM (OsjI9)

88 Trump should run an ad with a sad gay teen looking in a mirror with Colbert's joke playing in the background. Not that I'm advocating political correctness, just "make the other side live up to its own rules".

Posted by: Yuimetal at October 05, 2016 07:41 PM (Pby3z)

89 Jane, brilliant. They should stay fattened up for a few days.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:41 PM (B+MYz)

90 Yes, that sort of declaration is very pharisaic, see how holy I am.

Why don't you CARE about the ENVIRONMENT like I DO!!

Posted by: Church of Environtologist at October 05, 2016 07:42 PM (/kYMn)

91 Yeah, "Granny" Cankles still loves her some late term abortion. So does "devout" Catholic "Squint" Kaine.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:42 PM (1ZOkK)

92 "Every year for the past 30 years Mike Pence has said grace before eating the turkey that was pardoned by the President but killed by Dick Cheney."

------

I laughed at that one.

Posted by: Decaf at October 05, 2016 07:42 PM (8zHLN)

93 My new business venture is a water pipeline to the southwest from the east where they get more than they need. The envrionmentalists will look stupid trying to stop it like they do for oil and gas pipeline. Oh my gosh!! There's a leak, that water is going destroy the environment.

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at October 05, 2016 07:42 PM (6Ll1u)

94 Jane, keep them penned. Don't let the burn calories.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:42 PM (B+MYz)

95 I'll bet Colbert and Tim Kaine are yucking it up about this joke, while they're waiting in line for the confessional.

Posted by: dissent555 at October 05, 2016 07:40 PM (GdgAM)
..............

Is Timmah going to 'fess up about his night "debate" watching with his LGBT buddies?

Posted by: wth at October 05, 2016 07:43 PM (HgMAr)

96 84 "Anyone who claims he is "devout" Catholic, or any other denomination, is guilty of pride, so they're not devout."

Yep. If someone announces he or she is "devout" or a "good Catholic" keep your hand on your wallet.

Posted by: Donna&&&&V.deplorably brandishing ampersands&&&&so there at October 05, 2016 07:43 PM (P8951)

97
Jane, keep them penned. Don't let the burn calories.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:42 PM (B+MYz)

Will do. The good news is, they won't get raped before we eat them.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:43 PM (1ZOkK)

98 Colbert is #31 on my list of People I Will Punch In The Face. It's a comprehensive list.

Posted by: Dave at Buffalo Roam at October 05, 2016 07:44 PM (B7Fsl)

99 97
Jane, keep them penned. Don't let the burn calories.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:42 PM (B+MYz)

Will do. The good news is, they won't get raped before we eat them.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:43 PM (1ZOkK)

I love this place.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:46 PM (B+MYz)

100 Colberts a fag and his sh*t is all f*cked up.

Posted by: Bosk at October 05, 2016 07:47 PM (n2K+4)

101 I asked my sister in Jupiter FL. If they were ready and she gave me a list of all the booze they bought. Including Tenessee moonshine. Gees.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:49 PM (B+MYz)

102 I asked my sister in Jupiter FL. If they were ready and she gave me a list of all the booze they bought. Including Tenessee moonshine. Gees.

Ahhh..a moronette of the first order.

Posted by: eleven at October 05, 2016 07:49 PM (qUNWi)

103 Jane, remember the whole Horde is rooting and/or praying for your safety & survival .... please stop by as frequently as you can (consistent with all the preparation required) and keep us updated on conditions and your well-being !

Posted by: the deplorable sock_rat_eez, stay calm and carry on at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (Z8DIA)

104 Prayers please, for my miserable self.

As I mentioned in the thread below, one of the BP meds I've been given to take in the a.m., has caused my ankles and legs to swell up to Hillary cankles proportion.

I've never had swollen limbs in my life, even while pregnant.

I'm already on a No Sodium diet. My pharmacist said I probably need to have my med totally changed.

Called the doc today, and his nurse informed me: "You just need to LIE DOWN FIVE TIMES A DAY WITH YOUR FEET ELEVATED ABOVE YOUR HEART FOR 15-20 MINUTES PER DAY.

I am gobsmacked. As soon as Matthew has done its worst and passed, I'm going to have a conversation with condescending MD.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (1ZOkK)

105 Did someone mention babies? The other-other-white meat!

Posted by: Fat B*stard at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (hVdx9)

106 Jane, keep them penned. Don't let the burn calories.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:42 PM (B+MYz)

But free-range babies are less fattening.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (o9m/V)

107 There is no such thing as, "political correctness."

There is only, "the left decides what is acceptable."

Maybe someone can come up with a better, more pithy (or pissy, if you'd prefer) phrase.

Posted by: OldDominionMom at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (GzDYP)

108 Yes she is eleven...yes she is. Can spin a yarn too.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:51 PM (B+MYz)

109 >>>Colbert is supposed to be a devoit Catholic.

I take it that means he goes to Mass every week? But he's a liberal. What the heck does "devout" even mean if you participate in the ceremonies in a shallow, mechanical fashion, but have contempt for all the beliefs that underlie them?

Posted by: Yuimetal at October 05, 2016 07:51 PM (Pby3z)

110 I would bet money that Steven Colbert is not unfamiliar with the taste of penis.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 05, 2016 07:51 PM (rwI+c)

111 Clinton Foundation refiles 3 years of tax forms to include 'forgotten' donors. See the sock link.

Posted by: andycanuck at October 05, 2016 07:52 PM (LdMbv)

112 110 I would bet money that Steven Colbert is not unfamiliar with the taste of penis.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 05, 2016 07:51 PM (rwI+c)

And probably does more than just a tasteful sip.

Posted by: buzzion at October 05, 2016 07:53 PM (z/Ubi)

113
I am gobsmacked. As soon as Matthew has done its worst and passed, I'm going to have a conversation with condescending MD.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (1ZOkK)

I think you need a new doctor....and prayers for your safety!

Posted by: Tami...Powering through being a depolorable at October 05, 2016 07:53 PM (Enq6K)

114 104 Prayers please, for my miserable self.

As I mentioned in the thread below, one of the BP meds I've been given to take in the a.m., has caused my ankles and legs to swell up to Hillary cankles proportion.

I've never had swollen limbs in my life, even while pregnant.

I'm already on a No Sodium diet. My pharmacist said I probably need to have my med totally changed.

Called the doc today, and his nurse informed me: "You just need to LIE DOWN FIVE TIMES A DAY WITH YOUR FEET ELEVATED ABOVE YOUR HEART FOR 15-20 MINUTES PER DAY.

I am gobsmacked. As soon as Matthew has done its worst and passed, I'm going to have a conversation with condescending MD.
Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (1ZOkK)

Gees. Prayers Jane (not Colbert prayers either). And I have volunteered to come down there and dick punch that nurse. What a dunce.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:53 PM (B+MYz)

115 I watched Colbert one time. I was amazed by the fact that he was so unfunny. I was hypnotized by it, as it was so unbelievable.

Posted by: washrivergal madly and deeply deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:54 PM (CFc5L)

116 97 Will do. The good news is, they won't get raped before we eat them.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:43 PM (1ZOkK)

Why not do both simultaneously?

Posted by: Oderus Urungus, Efficiency Consultant (deceased, etc) at October 05, 2016 07:54 PM (CrZjR)

117 Prayers, Jane, that you are safe from the storm and that you are healthy.

Posted by: Votermom the deplorable @vm on gab at October 05, 2016 07:55 PM (Om16U)

118 My wife just got a new doc, because the last one said 'well you ARE getting older'...yikes. Did I say he has a death wish?

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:55 PM (B+MYz)

119 Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (1ZOkK)

My then 78 year old mother was in the hospital for a long time and had swollen legs when she got out. I believe they prescribed her 'water pills' but she doesn't recall that. Another alternative was going to be special socks that help the swelling.

But honestly, whenever, they have negative side effects to medication, they just go to the doctor and have different pills prescribed. It's not like there's a shortage of BP medications.

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at October 05, 2016 07:55 PM (n7ncP)

120 be careful Jane - stay above water and don't let those kiddies get waterlogged!

Posted by: geezer der mensch at October 05, 2016 07:55 PM (VHGGJ)

121
very Amanda Marcotte-ish of him

Posted by: M Magoo at October 05, 2016 07:55 PM (c5Esc)

122 Jane, keep them penned. Don't let the burn calories.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:42 PM (B+MYz)

But free-range babies are less fattening.
=====

And they squirm less when you dickpunch them.

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:56 PM (zu88C)

123 Sweaty babies are not salt-free.

Posted by: Votermom the deplorable @vm on gab at October 05, 2016 07:56 PM (Om16U)

124
But free-range babies are less fattening.

Head 'em up
Move 'em out

Crawlin', crawlin' crawlin'
Keep them kids from bawlin'

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at October 05, 2016 07:56 PM (IqV8l)

125 I got back home this morning after spending the last week in Albuquerque at Moms house. I went to watch the Balloon Festival, and eat massive amounts of food. I may have come up with a fun way to get govt criminals to confess or quit.

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at October 05, 2016 07:56 PM (6Ll1u)

126 I would bet money that Steven Colbert is not unfamiliar with the taste of penis.

Only on Fridays.

Posted by: Stephanie Colbert at October 05, 2016 07:57 PM (Tyii7)

127 104 Prayers please, for my miserable self.

As I mentioned in the thread below, one of the BP meds I've been given to take in the a.m., has caused my ankles and legs to swell up to Hillary cankles proportion.

I've never had swollen limbs in my life, even while pregnant.

I'm already on a No Sodium diet. My pharmacist said I probably need to have my med totally changed.

Called the doc today, and his nurse informed me: "You just need to LIE DOWN FIVE TIMES A DAY WITH YOUR FEET ELEVATED ABOVE YOUR HEART FOR 15-20 MINUTES PER DAY.

I am gobsmacked. As soon as Matthew has done its worst and passed, I'm going to have a conversation with condescending MD.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (1ZOkK)

And those free range are pretty hardy. hard to kill them with one dick punch.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:57 PM (B+MYz)

128 Called the doc today, and his nurse informed me: "You just need to LIE DOWN FIVE TIMES A DAY WITH YOUR FEET ELEVATED ABOVE YOUR HEART FOR 15-20 MINUTES PER DAY.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (1ZOkK)

Jane, that doesn't sound like the best medical advice, does it? Dang, this had to happen now?

May the force be with you. To help keep the winds at bay & of course, to help with the levitation.

Posted by: OldDominionMom at October 05, 2016 07:58 PM (GzDYP)

129 124
But free-range babies are less fattening.

Head 'em up
Move 'em out

Crawlin', crawlin' crawlin'
Keep them kids from bawlin'
Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at October 05, 2016 07:56 PM (IqV8l)

Very clever BCJ...on the fly...nice.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:58 PM (B+MYz)

130 Praying for you Jane and your loved ones. Also, any of the horde who may be in the line of this monster.

Posted by: washrivergal madly and deeply deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:59 PM (CFc5L)

131 As soon as this storm has passed (prayers we don't lose our home), I'm going back to smug, idiot doc and demand that he adjust the morning med.

Even my pharmacist told me this afternoon, that what I'm dealing with is reall extreme, and there are other meds idiot doc can prescribe me.

Meanwhile, I have last year's foreign student staying with us (son's university totally evacuated) and I have a lot of stress on me.

Prayers, please.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:59 PM (1ZOkK)

132 104 As I mentioned in the thread below, one of the BP meds I've been given to take in the a.m., has caused my ankles and legs to swell up to Hillary cankles proportion.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (1ZOkK)

Greetings, fellow displaced Southron. If I may ask, what is it you're being prescribed for BP? I'm on the usual lisinopril/HCTZ mix. I quickly became acclimated to it but haven't experienced anything you've described.

Posted by: antisocial displaced beatnik at October 05, 2016 08:01 PM (CrZjR)

133 131 As soon as this storm has passed (prayers we don't lose our home), I'm going back to smug, idiot doc and demand that he adjust the morning med.

Even my pharmacist told me this afternoon, that what I'm dealing with is reall extreme, and there are other meds idiot doc can prescribe me.

Meanwhile, I have last year's foreign student staying with us (son's university totally evacuated) and I have a lot of stress on me.

Prayers, please.
Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:59 PM (1ZOkK)

When you go off on your doctor I hope you throw in something about prescribing something that will work rather than what some cheap skank of a pharmaceutical rep sold him while he dreamed about banging her.

Posted by: buzzion at October 05, 2016 08:02 PM (z/Ubi)

134 Colbert is #31 on my list of People I Will Punch In The Face. It's a comprehensive list.

I have Letterman penciled in at both 27 and 12.

Colbert doesn't even get mentioned.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 05, 2016 08:02 PM (rwI+c)

135 Leftists are the most racist, sexists, bigoted bunch, they are and assume everyone else is.

Posted by: Skip at October 05, 2016 08:02 PM (sWbjH)

136 When you go off on your doctor I hope you throw in something about prescribing something that will work rather than what some cheap skank of a pharmaceutical rep sold him while he dreamed about banging her.
Posted by: buzzion at October 05, 2016 08:02 PM (z/U

Damn you Buzzion. Cleans screen.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 08:03 PM (B+MYz)

137 may as well join the limerick parade:

There once was an asshole named steven

who faked like he was believin'

made fun of Mike Pence

and everyday hence

has been bicuspid retrievin'.

Posted by: seamrog at October 05, 2016 08:03 PM (OsjI9)

138
Jane, keep them penned. Don't let the burn calories.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:42 PM (B+MYz)

I'm on Triamterene-hctz. Each morning. Doc just doubled the dose a couple of weeks ago

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:03 PM (1ZOkK)

139 Jane D'oh, prayers ascending you you, yours, and the rest of the Horde in harms way.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at October 05, 2016 08:04 PM (u82oZ)

140 There used to be money, real money, in staging rowing events.

And wood chopping events.

Any sport can die out, and if it happens to football, I'll be happy.

And this time, the only they'll be able to say is: Big Black Men, hardest hurt.

Posted by: Jack at October 05, 2016 08:04 PM (YX9fV)

141 Praying for you Jane.

Posted by: Skip at October 05, 2016 08:05 PM (sWbjH)

142 Progs like Colbert and the rest of the Scummywood cool kidz make it really, really difficult to practice basic Christian charity and not wish horrible, awful things to befall them.

Mark me, the USA elects, or "elects", The Witch and there will be blood in the streets and bullets flying before Thanksgiving 2017, and that's even if the economy doesn't poop the bed before then.

Posted by: DocJ at October 05, 2016 08:05 PM (5Nr9V)

143 I'm on Triamterene-hctz. Each morning. Doc just doubled the dose a couple of weeks ago

-----

Diuretics. Trying to get you to pee off the cankle water.

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:05 PM (zu88C)

144 If my health was just okay, it would be possibly evacuating easier.

Nurse "warned" me about driving for several hours in an evacuation.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:06 PM (1ZOkK)

145 Please. do not insult 7th grade class clowns with comparison to Colbert

Posted by: talgus at October 05, 2016 08:06 PM (fJQAI)

146 Leftists are the most racist, sexists, bigoted bunch, they are and assume everyone else is.

Posted by: Skip
****

They project all those tendencies onto others.
They are completely unaware of this and are pretty much incapable of ever seeing their own flaws.
Two major traits of the far left: Narcissism (hence the projection and lack of self awareness) and pathological denial of reality (which is why they try the same things over and over).

Posted by: Fat B*stard at October 05, 2016 08:06 PM (hVdx9)

147 I need a life hack. Is there a trick to getting the seal off a new jar of peanut butter all in one piece? I always have to pick little remnant strips of foilish stuff off.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 05, 2016 08:06 PM (rwI+c)

148 Diuretics. Trying to get you to pee off the cankle water.

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:05 PM (zu88C)

I know. It's not working. I drink a cup of coffee in the morning, and water (glasses and glasses) throughout the day.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:07 PM (1ZOkK)

149 Progs like Colbert and the rest of the Scummywood cool kidz make it really, really difficult to practice basic Christian charity and not wish horrible, awful things to befall them.

Mark me, the USA elects, or "elects", The Witch and there will be blood in the streets and bullets flying before Thanksgiving 2017, and that's even if the economy doesn't poop the bed before then.

Posted by: DocJ
*****

Makes me glad I'm agnostic.

Posted by: Fat B*stard at October 05, 2016 08:07 PM (hVdx9)

150 Get steel teeth installed. They won't dare make you get on your knees.

Posted by: Jaws at October 05, 2016 08:07 PM (Pby3z)

151 If there is, I sure haven't found it.

Posted by: the deplorable sock_rat_eez, stay calm and carry on at October 05, 2016 08:07 PM (Z8DIA)

152 I'm already on a No Sodium diet. My pharmacist said I probably need to have my med totally changed.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (1ZOkK)

As someone who has spent the last six and a half years up to my ears in the Medical System, I think you need a new *doctor*.

Unfortunately, finding one who doesn't just work off of industry lists is nearly impossible.

It sounds like they don't have the faintest clue what the problem is and are throwing random crap at you and hoping it doesn't kill you.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at October 05, 2016 08:08 PM (wB8Tg)

153 You'd think the "comedians" would be hoping for a Trump win as for the last eight years they have been dry on material, as The One was off-limits and so is Cankles.

Posted by: washrivergal madly and deeply deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:08 PM (CFc5L)

154 I'm on Triamterene-hctz. Each morning. Doc just doubled the dose a couple of weeks ago
Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:03 PM (1ZOkK)

******

You may want to ask them about Lisinopril-HCTZ. I have taken 20-12.5 once a day for years with no issues.

Posted by: GrampyB at October 05, 2016 08:08 PM (zbbdN)

155 I could help with a pickle jar.

Posted by: H-Roid at October 05, 2016 08:09 PM (HgMAr)

156 Wait, he's still on TV? What ever network he's on is that desperate for programming they have to leave him on the air? A test pattern would get higher ratings

Posted by: TheQuietMan at October 05, 2016 08:09 PM (auHtY)

157 The peanut butter seals have these three little tabs hanging off, implying that you could use them to peel the seal cleanly but, they lie.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 05, 2016 08:09 PM (rwI+c)

158 No Sodium Diet?! Hmmph. Bet he loves his statins, too.

Posted by: t-bird at October 05, 2016 08:10 PM (J3phO)

159 I need a life hack. Is there a trick to getting the
seal off a new jar of peanut butter all in one piece? I always have to
pick little remnant strips of foilish stuff off.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 05, 2016 08:06 PM (rwI+c)

Get Hillary to open the jar. She's an expert, with lots of experience. (horks peanut crunch chunk into waste basket)

Posted by: Huma at October 05, 2016 08:11 PM (o9m/V)

160 So who else can say that they can watch a debate between Obama's favorite AG and some other person for the privilege of taking Barbara Boxers Senate seat here in Cali? We just call her *The Hot AG*. I'll probably watch with the sound off.

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at October 05, 2016 08:12 PM (6Ll1u)

161 Doesn't Colbert make some claim to serious religious faith himself? Isn't he a deacon or something?

He's a bad man and I hope bad things happen to him. With a razor.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at October 05, 2016 08:12 PM (UHLlC)

162 138
Jane, keep them penned. Don't let the burn calories.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 07:42 PM (B+

I'm on Triamterene-hctz. Each morning. Doc just doubled the dose a couple of weeks ago
Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:03 PM (1ZOkK)

Gees Jane, sounds like they are just experimenting. New doc

Posted by: Cannibal Bob 'wife gave him the cold shoulder' at October 05, 2016 08:12 PM (B+MYz)

163 colbert is supposedly a practicing catholic.....

Posted by: phoenixgirl, deplorable is better than despicable at October 05, 2016 08:12 PM (0O7c5)

164 Thanks, guys, for all your advice. The mere fact that asshole doctor thinks I should live the rest of my life lying down five times a day with my legs raised above my heart, fifteen minutes per "session" is incredible to me.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:12 PM (1ZOkK)

165 I've been known to wrangle a rump, or two.

Posted by: Stephanie Colbert at October 05, 2016 08:12 PM (Tyii7)

166 Leftists are the most racist, sexists, bigoted bunch, they are and assume everyone else is.

Posted by: Skip at October 05, 2016 08:02 PM (sWbjH)

Yes. They put every person into a classification of the left's creation and declare with certainty, what is in that person's heart. As if they are mind readers. It's insane & childish.

Posted by: OldDominionMom at October 05, 2016 08:12 PM (GzDYP)

167 Interesting fact about Stephen Colbert:

It's impossible to dickpunch him.

Posted by: Unsure if deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:13 PM (Eynls)

168 Who names their kid Buster Posey?

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 08:13 PM (dFi94)

169
I take it that means he goes to Mass every week? But he's a liberal. What the heck does "devout" even mean if you participate in the ceremonies in a shallow, mechanical fashion, but have contempt for all the beliefs that underlie them?

++++

yanno. i could take a stab at this but you wouldn't get it and it'd start an argument.

Posted by: Bigby's Ouija Board at October 05, 2016 08:13 PM (U0lQa)

170 It is and always has been about who can say something, and who cannot.

And who may laugh!

Posted by: His Barking Seals and Hooting Chimps at October 05, 2016 08:13 PM (J3phO)

171 Who names their kid Buster Posey?

I don't understand the problem?

Posted by: Buster Hyman at October 05, 2016 08:14 PM (rwI+c)

172 Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:12 PM (1ZOkK)

It is to me too. I've never heard of such lousy advice.

Posted by: washrivergal madly and deeply deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:14 PM (CFc5L)

173 Jane do you exercise? Sweating can be helpful with retained water .

I know some women hate to sweat. Not saying that's you.

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:14 PM (zu88C)

174 #3 needs to be swatted away.

Colbert is an insignificant twat.

Posted by: Cheri at October 05, 2016 08:14 PM (TmVQX)

175 168
Who names their kid Buster Posey?

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 08:13 PM (dFi94)

he's awesome and i love his nick name...real name is gerald

Posted by: phoenixgirl, deplorable is better than despicable at October 05, 2016 08:14 PM (0O7c5)

176 Jane, you're not supposed to take Triamterene when you're on a low-sodium diet. It causes low blood sodium. Hyponatremia is no joke.

Is your blood being tested regularly?

I suspect these doctors are just warming seats.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at October 05, 2016 08:14 PM (wB8Tg)

177
Speaking of names....

The last name "McSwiggin" is a real last name. I shit you not.

McSwiggin.

There are, or were, people with this name.

Posted by: M Magoo at October 05, 2016 08:14 PM (pY5jh)

178 I hate the Mets. Where's JackStraw?

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 08:15 PM (dFi94)

179 Not a 7th grade class clown.

A 7th grade assclown.

Posted by: Hank at October 05, 2016 08:15 PM (t5fxX)

180 Jane D'oh- please, please find a new doctor or I can come down and "talk" to yours. I am known to all of my docs as the patient that doesn't take any s�=the. My husband told me I have a big "D" for difficult on all of my charts.

Posted by: Peggy at October 05, 2016 08:15 PM (HBU7W)

181 Who names their kid Buster Posey?

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 08:13 PM (dFi94)

*****

Why do you ask?

Posted by: Great Grandpa and Grandma Keaton at October 05, 2016 08:16 PM (zbbdN)

182 I more than appreciate ya'll's prayers for FL, GA and SC.

We will evacuate if things get hairy here. Husband has a best friend who is also in charge of security for a certain place where large, floaty things come in, discharge stuff, and reload and head back out to sea.

Friend is in constant contact with our governor.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:16 PM (1ZOkK)

183 After watching one of our shows Monday night, I came in for the ONT. Wife was in the living room reading and left the tv on for noise. Colbert came on and in his monologue started making fun of the Jewish New Year. I was so enraged at this stupid fuck that the wife had to stop me from throwing something heavy through the tv. I was furious and it took me an hour and a couple of beers to calm down.

Posted by: Deplorable Old Blue at October 05, 2016 08:16 PM (9iR5/)

184 Grump if you can get a opening in the foil work a butter knife around from there.

Posted by: Skip at October 05, 2016 08:16 PM (sWbjH)

185
And who names their kid Two Dogs F***ing?

Indians, that's who.

Posted by: M Magoo at October 05, 2016 08:17 PM (pY5jh)

186 jane...you need a new doctor.....is there a mayo clinic near you? if not find the top heart hospital in your area and get the top doctor there.

Posted by: phoenixgirl, deplorable is better than despicable at October 05, 2016 08:17 PM (0O7c5)

187 i love his nick name...real name is gerald

Posted by: phoenixgirl, deplorable is better than despicable at October 05, 2016 08:14 PM (0O7c5)
============================================

Yeah that could explain it. Buster > Gerald. I had an uncle named Harold. Everyone called him Bud from the day he was born. Apparently not even his own parents liked his real name.

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 08:17 PM (dFi94)

188 I would like to purchase some outrage from the Outlet but I have a problem. I have heard the name before but I could not tell anyone who this Colbert fella is.

Is there any good reason why I should learn more?

Posted by: Tim in Illinois at October 05, 2016 08:17 PM (d76uN)

189 Next week's debate's opening question:

Mr. Trump, recently you appeared on Saturday Night Live, dressed up as Alec Baldwin, and said that Secretary Clinton's mouth looked like a "little butthole". Secretary Clinton, you have twenty minutes to tell us how that made you feel.

Posted by: Stu Podaso at October 05, 2016 08:17 PM (DUg/L)

190 if he pisses you off so much why do you watch?

Posted by: Bigby's Ouija Board at October 05, 2016 08:17 PM (U0lQa)

191 Thanks, guys, for all your advice. The mere fact
that asshole doctor thinks I should live the rest of my life lying down
five times a day with my legs raised above my heart, fifteen minutes per
"session" is incredible to me.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:12 PM (1ZOkK)

That posture has always been very lucrative for me.

Posted by: Crystal Meth, skank ho' emeritus at October 05, 2016 08:18 PM (o9m/V)

192 Bye bye, sock.

Posted by: GrampyB at October 05, 2016 08:18 PM (zbbdN)

193 Swiggy McSwiggin, went to school with him.

Posted by: Skip at October 05, 2016 08:18 PM (sWbjH)

194 I'm already on a No Sodium diet. My pharmacist said I probably need to have my med totally changed.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 07:50 PM (1ZOkK)

Jane, do you know that you need to avoid excess potassium when you are on any -hctz drug? Most low-sodium prepared foods ("healthy soups" frex) have added potassium, as well as salt-substitutes.

Also I thought sodium avoidance is rarely indicated anymore.

I think you need a new doctor.

Posted by: Votermom the deplorable @vm on gab at October 05, 2016 08:19 PM (Om16U)

195 Husband has a best friend who is also in charge of security for a
certain place where large, floaty things come in, discharge stuff, and
reload and head back out to sea.
======

Is he hiring?

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:19 PM (zu88C)

196
Let's start a nood thing here at AoS and call our socks "hosiery."

Posted by: M Magoo at October 05, 2016 08:19 PM (pY5jh)

197 We have MANY great doctors in the area. Unfortunately, the good ones aren't taking new patients.

Meanwhile, I'm focused on surviving the TS, hurricane on Friday.

My idiot doc is our (R) state senator.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:19 PM (1ZOkK)

198 Yeah that could explain it. Buster > Gerald. I had an uncle named Harold. Everyone called him Bud from the day he was born. Apparently not even his own parents liked his real name.
Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 08:17 PM (dFi94)

*****
A friend of mine's full name is Harold K. Johnson. Strangely, he goes by Keith.

Posted by: GrampyB at October 05, 2016 08:20 PM (zbbdN)

199 Is he hiring?

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:19 PM (zu88C)

He's hiring people with degrees in criminal justice and/or military service (preferable combat).

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:20 PM (1ZOkK)

200 Is he hiring?

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:19 PM (zu88C)

You really want to work at a whale brothel?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at October 05, 2016 08:21 PM (o9m/V)

201 My idiot doc is our (R) state senator.
Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:19 PM (1ZOkK)

O_o

Posted by: Votermom the deplorable @vm on gab at October 05, 2016 08:21 PM (Om16U)

202 Odd. In a lot of media profiles of Colbert, the writers make a big deal of Stephen Colbert's Christian faith, he teaches Sunday school, etc. Yet here's this supposedly devout Christian clowning on Pence's declaration of faith. It's not just a hacky joke; it's a joke that seems more likely to come from a very crude atheist rather than a strong practicing Christian.

It's almost like Colbert's actual religion is Latter-Day Progressivism rather than Christianity.

Posted by: JimDelRey at October 05, 2016 08:21 PM (Hlh7B)

203 He's hiring people with degrees in criminal justice and/or military service (preferable combat).

=====

Oh really...

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:22 PM (zu88C)

204 Every ten seconds in America, a baby gets its dick punched. By Donald Trump. Elect me and help me to put this monster behind bars where he belongs.

Posted by: I am Hillary Clinton and I approve this message at October 05, 2016 08:23 PM (Pby3z)

205 Try running warm water on the seal to soften the adhesive before opening?

Posted by: Sort-of-Mad Max at October 05, 2016 08:23 PM (nd1zx)

206 Buthter Dougleth ith dead?

Posted by: Mike Tyson at October 05, 2016 08:23 PM (Tyii7)

207 >>>198 A friend of mine's full name is Harold K. Johnson. Strangely, he goes by Keith.
Posted by: GrampyB at October 05, 2016 08:20 PM (zbbdN)

Good book about a guy named Harold K Johnson called Honorable Warrior.

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at October 05, 2016 08:23 PM (WZXpb)

208 I have never understood why people who clearly do not believe in the tenets of a faith, continue to hang out at the church they don't believe in.

I mean, it's not like the Unitarians went bankrupt, right?

Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 05, 2016 08:23 PM (rwI+c)

209 I love the name Buster Posey. It's a great baseball name. I'm not a Giants fan - but he looks like the All American Boy.

Posted by: Donna&&&&V.deplorably brandishing ampersands&&&&so there at October 05, 2016 08:24 PM (P8951)

210 I more than appreciate ya'll's prayers for FL, GA and SC.

?!?! Are there golf courses at risk?

Posted by: Barack Hussein Obama at October 05, 2016 08:24 PM (J3phO)

211 It's long past time for some prominent "right winger" to openly mock that jackwagon.
I miss Lee Atwater...

Posted by: Anon a mouse... at October 05, 2016 08:24 PM (C9pBZ)

212 You really want to work at a whale brothel?

=======

I prefer 'big-boned'.

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:24 PM (zu88C)

213 Husband, son, and foreign student went to dinner tonight with the promise to bring me some F*cking Awesome Eggplant Parm.

I haven't consumed any sodium in Two Days.

Son saw my ankles and legs and said, "Jeeze mom, you have Hillary cankles"

Kill Me Now.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:25 PM (1ZOkK)

214 It's been 10 years since a Cat 3 hurricane hit the US. That storm drought broke all known records, there is nothing global warming can't do. 4,000 days. Prayers to all in the path, remember, there is no such thing as being too safe.

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at October 05, 2016 08:25 PM (6Ll1u)

215 Whale brothel?
Hmm. I thought it was Baytown...

Posted by: Anon a mouse... at October 05, 2016 08:25 PM (C9pBZ)

216 Well its said many Jewish people are lefists first, I'm sure there are many Christians who are in the same boat.

Posted by: Skip at October 05, 2016 08:25 PM (sWbjH)

217 My idiot doc is our (R) state senator.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:19 PM (1ZOkK)

Seriously, THERE IS ANOTHER DOC SOMEWHERE. Someone is accepting patients, or can be convinced to. I'm lucky/unlucky to have two large medical groups here, there's lots of competition but they also cut corners.

Your *normal* fulltime doc is basically part-time in how much time they spend on a patient, I would not even *consider* an *actual* part-timer.

I'm not kidding, it sounds like this doctor is not paying attention.

It's called "medical misadventure," you can look it up, but shouldn't, because you have high blood pressure.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at October 05, 2016 08:25 PM (wB8Tg)

218 I've fired like 15-16 doctors. After the first few it's no big deal.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at October 05, 2016 08:26 PM (wB8Tg)

219 Son saw my ankles and legs and said, "Jeeze mom, you have Hillary cankles"
===============================================

Yeah, that's a grounding. I don't care how old he is. Grounded.

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 08:26 PM (dFi94)

220 Harold K. Johnson is right!

Posted by: Olsen Johnson at October 05, 2016 08:26 PM (IqV8l)

221 I wanted to say something snarky about the speedo and bikini hike in the sidebar, but I can't top "Harrison Bergeron".

Maybe reverse Darwinism. Denial of the fittest?

Posted by: Bandersnatch at October 05, 2016 08:26 PM (mgbwf)

222 Have no fear, as soon as this hurricane passes, I'm back to looking for other doctors.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:26 PM (1ZOkK)

223 >>>In a lot of media profiles of Colbert, the writers make a big deal of Stephen Colbert's Christian faith, he teaches Sunday school, etc.

Jimmah also teaches Sunday school. Doesn't mean diddly.

Posted by: Yuimetal at October 05, 2016 08:27 PM (Pby3z)

224 jane....are you drinking enough water?

Posted by: phoenixgirl, deplorable is better than despicable at October 05, 2016 08:27 PM (0O7c5)

225 Jimmah also teaches Sunday school. Doesn't mean diddly.

Posted by: Yuimetal at October 05, 2016 08:27 PM (Pby3z)
============================================

I would have liked to have sat in on one of his classes.

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 08:28 PM (dFi94)

226 jane....are you drinking enough water?

Posted by: phoenixgirl, deplorable is better than despicable at October 05, 2016 08:27 PM (0O7c5)

CONSTANTLY. I have a cup of coffee in the morning, and drink loads of water all day.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:29 PM (1ZOkK)

227 Jimmah also teaches Sunday school. Doesn't mean diddly.

Posted by: Yuimetal at October 05, 2016 08:27 PM (Pby3z)

"Today, kids, we are going to learn how Jesus redistributed the loaves and the fishes, in an ecologically sound fashion,"

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at October 05, 2016 08:29 PM (o9m/V)

228 Jane, I concur with the Morons here and suggest finding another doctor. Something just doesn't smell right.

Anyway, my parents (and their kittehs, and doggeh, and ferrets) in FL are now in a hurricane warning zone as of some time during my transit from SC to GA. I (and my kittehs) should be good through through Sunday, at least. One day at a time.

Posted by: antisocial displaced beatnik at October 05, 2016 08:29 PM (CrZjR)

229 Have no fear, as soon as this hurricane passes, I'm back to looking for other doctors.
Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:26 PM (1ZOkK)

*****

I would be tempted to split pills while monitoring blood pressure several times daily until you can find a decent Doc.

Posted by: GrampyB at October 05, 2016 08:29 PM (zbbdN)

230 Since my recent disengagement from the workforce you squares are so hopelessly trapped in ( *sob*) , I have been researching alternative (cheap!) medicine.

There are a couple of decent medicine men around with sweat lodges, but I am still a little iffy on peyote.

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:29 PM (zu88C)

231 You guys are great with your advice. Considering all of it.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:30 PM (1ZOkK)

232 There are a couple of decent medicine men around with sweat lodges, but I am still a little iffy on peyote.

Posted by: Mortimer, deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:29 PM (zu88C)

You can't spell "pot" without pee-oh-tee. Vote for me! Pot in every chicken.

Posted by: Gary Johnson at October 05, 2016 08:32 PM (o9m/V)

233 How is a 4-0 West Virginia ranked 8 spots behind a 3-2 Ole Miss?

Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 05, 2016 08:32 PM (rwI+c)

234 CONSTANTLY. I have a cup of coffee in the morning, and drink loads of water all day.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:29 PM (1ZOkK)

You don't want to run dry, but too much strips sodium from you (and magnesium and potassium etc).

Diuretics are kind of a vicious cycle.

Basically once you start that cycle you have to monitor it, and it sounds like they're not.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at October 05, 2016 08:32 PM (wB8Tg)

235 There are a couple of decent medicine men around with sweat lodges, but I am still a little iffy on peyote.

Pick out the little white nodules first. Your stomach will thank you.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 05, 2016 08:33 PM (rwI+c)

236 Who names their kids Buster Hymen?

Posted by: Hank at October 05, 2016 08:33 PM (t5fxX)

237 I tell the kinds in my Sunday School class that Adam and Eve were bi-curious.

Posted by: Stephanie Colbert at October 05, 2016 08:34 PM (Tyii7)

238 Even the Bible must fit the narrative.

Posted by: Stephanie Colbert at October 05, 2016 08:35 PM (Tyii7)

239 I am kind of shocked so few hurricane-built houses have been made. I'm sure it's expensive, but at least the reinforced-poured concrete version is not that bad.

I don't know if their record is not that good, but that would seem to be a solvable problem.

I am just surprised that the East coast of Florida isn't at least dotted with concrete dome houses. I would think not losing everything would be more important than a traditional look.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at October 05, 2016 08:36 PM (wB8Tg)

240 Well, I'm off to lie down for another 5-20 minutes or so, for my suddenly freakishly swollen ankles and legs to "go down."

Jeebus.

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:37 PM (1ZOkK)

241 15 or 20

Yeesh

Posted by: Jane D'oh, Proud Deplorable at October 05, 2016 08:37 PM (1ZOkK)

242 Trumpeting Colbert's supposed faith sounds liks an attempt to con orthodox Christians. "See? You can be disrepectful, profane, diss the tenets of your faith, and STILL be devout and pious, just like Colbert." It's an exercise in manipulation.

Posted by: Yuimetal at October 05, 2016 08:38 PM (Pby3z)

243 always thought ankles were related to circulation problems

Posted by: Bigby's Ouija Board at October 05, 2016 08:39 PM (U0lQa)

244 My favorite is when a leftist tries to show you from the Bible (which he doesn't believe in) that Jesus (who he doesn't believe in) was a total socialist.

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 08:40 PM (dFi94)

245 i killed it

Posted by: grammie winger, waiting for the trumpets at October 05, 2016 08:43 PM (dFi94)

246 There is a nood

Posted by: Votermom the deplorable @vm on gab at October 05, 2016 08:47 PM (Om16U)

247 writers make a big deal of Stephen Colbert's Christian faith

Obama is a Christian, too, ya know.
And very much an American.

Posted by: Writers at October 05, 2016 08:48 PM (J3phO)

248 Mike Pence says it's good to spend time on one's knees -- praying for
wisdom, obviously -- and super-funny, super-innovative Stephen Colbert
immediately thinks of sucking cock.

did anybody else read it that way at first?

Posted by: Burnt Toast at October 05, 2016 08:53 PM (P/kVC)

249 ugh

Posted by: phoenixgirl, deplorable is better than despicable at October 05, 2016 08:58 PM (0O7c5)

250 he was safe

Posted by: phoenixgirl, deplorable is better than despicable at October 05, 2016 08:59 PM (0O7c5)

251 Making idiotic faces is the ultimate form of comedy.

Posted by: Titanium at October 05, 2016 09:56 PM (u9UgT)

252 When they go low we go high... Oops never mind

Posted by: Michelle Obama at October 06, 2016 12:48 PM (2+lTc)

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