Blowoff Thread: Silly Inventions [Y-not]

Here's a silly thread while we all sit, sans pants, waiting for the turkey to roast.

A couple of weeks ago I spotted this in our local Hobby Lobby:

There's a product for a problem I didn't know existed!

Reminded me of silly invention ideas. For example, an old boss of mine wanted to invent something called a Buffet Buddy to solve the very real problem of how to hold your plate, drink, and silverware while navigating through a buffet.

Here's another invention that Mr. Moxie came up with, inspired by the sight of so many abandoned and beater cars on the rural roads of our new state (and the assumed transportation needs of the owners of said cars):

The idea is that when you need a lift, this is what'll come to pick you up:

**UPDATED by request... Ellie May:

(There are some VERY unsettling pictures of an elderly "Ellie May" that pop up on Google, btw. You are warned!)**

Related: Here's a list of the 25 Strangest Patents Ever Filed. In light of Obamacare, I could envision HHS placing a bulk order for #18, can't you?

Also from The Daily Mail, a list of the wackiest inventions from WWI.

Open thread for silly topics.

Posted by: Open Blogger at 12:00 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Happy Thanksgiving all!

Posted by: Brave Sir Robin at November 26, 2015 11:56 AM (5buP8)

2 Another first

Posted by: Skip at November 26, 2015 11:56 AM (XRpjE)

3 Starting off right!! FIRST!!

Posted by: Brave Sir Robin at November 26, 2015 11:56 AM (5buP8)

4 Missed it by this [ ] much

Posted by: Skip at November 26, 2015 11:56 AM (XRpjE)

5 If by "first" you mean second...yeah.

Posted by: Brave Sir Robin at November 26, 2015 11:57 AM (5buP8)

6 Where's Ellie May?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 26, 2015 11:57 AM (LUgeY)

7 Oh my goodness, that IS an oversight.

Be back in a second...

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 11:58 AM (t5zYU)

8 Actually, the 'Goober' idea is a cute one. 'We promise to show up in a car that's nothing like anything you've ever been in before'.

Might be someone's Model A, might be someone's 200SX drift car. Just be prepared to be surprised.

Posted by: JEM at November 26, 2015 11:58 AM (o+SC1)

9 I was thinking about my sun visor while commuting yesterday. Not silly, but some guy invented it.

Posted by: fluffy at November 26, 2015 11:59 AM (AfsKp)

10 The socks are just about the stupidest things I have seen, save for what comes out of our government.

Posted by: Moki at November 26, 2015 11:59 AM (7q2ch)

11 Speaking of waiting for the Turkey to cook, everyone DID remember to remove that plastic bag from the cavity. You know the one with the neck, gizzards,etc. The one my wife left in the turkey, TWO different Thanksgivings.

Yeah, that one.

Posted by: Nip Sip at November 26, 2015 11:59 AM (jJRIy)

12 Keysocks. Turning up the crotchless pantyhose to 11.

Posted by: JEM at November 26, 2015 12:00 PM (o+SC1)

13 Yeah, I've noticed many women appear to operate as if it's against the law to wear anything between their shoes and their feet. Which strikes me as mildly amusing.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:01 PM (Dj0WE)

14 Speaking of waiting for the Turkey to cook, I wish a happy Thanksgiving (or however you spell it in Cyrillic) to the Russians serving in the Mideast...

Posted by: JEM at November 26, 2015 12:01 PM (o+SC1)

15 Speaking of waiting for the Turkey to cook, everyone DID remember to remove that plastic bag from the cavity. You know the one with the neck, gizzards,etc. The one my wife left in the turkey, TWO different Thanksgivings.

Yeah, that one.

Posted by: Nip Sip at November 26, 2015 11:59 AM (jJRIy)

Reminds me of the year I removed the innards bag, cooked el pavo, and then found the second innards bag. So mean of them.

Posted by: Snoodling World Champion 1997 at November 26, 2015 12:02 PM (k9qR4)

16 Just got back from the sweetest church service of the year: 1 hour of alternate hymn singing, w/praises and prayers from the congregation. Next: off to the oldest continuous high school football rivalry west of the Mississippi, the Kirkwood/Webster Thanksgiving Day game. GO KIRKWOOD PIONEERS!! Then consume mass quantities of food. Followed by spankings, then the...(insert bad sister Zoot quote here.)

Posted by: Brave Sir Robin at November 26, 2015 12:02 PM (5buP8)

17 And IIRC, Goober drove a tow truck.

Apropos.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 26, 2015 12:02 PM (LUgeY)

18 Thanksgiving miracle!

CMP is now allowed to sell 1911's to the public.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 26, 2015 12:03 PM (9jeGC)

19 Google Ellie May... and prepare to be unnerved by the number of pictures of an elderly gal in Ellie May get up.

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:03 PM (t5zYU)

20 @14

Portable bath solution looks speciously like masturbation kit.

Posted by: Nip Sip at November 26, 2015 12:03 PM (jJRIy)

21 Two things that do not appear to have been invented yet, and are related:

A competent book-holder for exercise equipment, and a discreet book-holder for hands-free reading in the bathroom.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:03 PM (Dj0WE)

22 I want number 9! Does it include gerbils?

Posted by: Richard Gere at November 26, 2015 12:04 PM (jJRIy)

23 >>>Buffet Buddy to solve the very real problem of how to hold your plate, drink, and silverware while navigating through a buffet.

I think I have a clever idea.

Posted by: zombie Tray vom Martin at November 26, 2015 12:05 PM (YQ7o1)

24 Also from The Daily Mail, a list of the wackiest inventions from WWI.

What? Mustard gas wasn't on the list? Hard to believe.

Posted by: rickl at November 26, 2015 12:05 PM (sdi6R)

25 A competent book-holder for exercise equipment, and a discreet book-holder for hands-free reading in the bathroom.
---

Good ideas.

Is there a good book light? I buy a new one every couple of years for reading in bed and am always disappointed.

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:05 PM (t5zYU)

26 I loved Ellie-May's voice. Southern. Comfort.

Posted by: Brave Sir Robin at November 26, 2015 12:06 PM (5buP8)

27 >> A competent book-holder for exercise equipment, and
>> a discreet book-holder for hands-free reading in the
>> bathroom.

If you're exercising aggressively enough for it to matter you're not going to be reading.

As for the other form of exertion...'hands-free' reading. Ahem.

Happy Thanksgiving. No avoiding the relatives by hiding out in the crapper, got it?

Posted by: JEM at November 26, 2015 12:06 PM (o+SC1)

28 CMP is now allowed to sell 1911's to the public.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 26, 2015 12:03 PM (9jeGC)

Huzzah!

Maybe we can convince Andy to do a gun thread devoted to the 1911!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at November 26, 2015 12:06 PM (Zu3d9)

29 Google Ellie May... and prepare to be unnerved by the number of pictures of an elderly gal in Ellie May get up.

Meh. I'll just rely on my imagination as usual.

It's nearly football time.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 26, 2015 12:07 PM (LUgeY)

30 Are you going to do elbows today, CBD?

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:07 PM (t5zYU)

31 ...Ellis Mae had her some sharp elbows...woooeedogies!

Posted by: billygoat at November 26, 2015 12:08 PM (p9Lqy)

32 A friend of mine told me he saw the actress who played Ellie May (Donna Douglas) on the 700 Club.

Douglas was a devout Christian.

After Beverly Hillbillies, she kept getting script offers, but pretty much all of them required her to get nekkid.

This she would not do.

So the offers eventually dried up.

Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:09 PM (SYNdO)

33 >> Is there a good book light? I buy a new one every
>> couple of years for reading in bed and am always disappointed.

Got a nice little clip-on LED thing that runs on 2 AAA cells, from Ikea, but my search-fu fails me right now in finding it on their website. As I recall it was cheap enough that you could throw three in the cart and hardly notice at checkout.

Posted by: JEM at November 26, 2015 12:09 PM (o+SC1)

34 Is there a good book light? I buy a new one every couple of years for reading in bed and am always disappointed.
Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:05 PM (t5zYU)

Alas, no there is not. In fact, there is a theme growing here. There is a "perfect" posture for reading, but not of our normal furniture is really designed to be that. Why is that? Every place I sit to read I'm having to adjust myself almost constantly.

I end up with a stiff neck or sleeping legs or sore back or I can't position the book at the right angle to hit the light or something or all of it.

Why is that? Are we not people? Is this not the 21st century???

WHERE IS MY FLYING CAR???!!!

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:09 PM (Dj0WE)

35 The sock thing is pure genius. Women get to experience the comfort of socks, and foot-guys like us get to imagine they are barefoot, sweaty bare feet in all their smelly, dirty, callused heeled glory! Oh, man.

Posted by: Quentin Tarantino and Rex Ryan at November 26, 2015 12:10 PM (YQ7o1)

36 NY Slime staff obviously on vacation. ONE story out of a hundred has a comment section

Posted by: Nip Sip at November 26, 2015 12:10 PM (jJRIy)

37 Thx for the tip, JEM.

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:10 PM (t5zYU)

38 (There are some VERY unsettling pictures of an elderly "Ellie May" that pop up on Google, btw. You are warned!)**

I instead ran the search for "Donna Douglas images" and had no difficulty.

Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:10 PM (SYNdO)

39 i loved ellie mae in the beverly hillbillies but she seemed to be stuck in that roll in real life...her hair style never really changed

Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel at November 26, 2015 12:10 PM (0O7c5)

40 I loved Ellie-May's voice. Southern. Comfort.

I'm still good friends with two sisters back home in Alabama whose voices and drawls are just as sweet as honey. Hope to see one of them down here around New Years. One of her grandkids will be in the halftime band during one of the bowl games.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 26, 2015 12:11 PM (LUgeY)

41 Rap/hiphop /'music'.

Posted by: Eromero at November 26, 2015 12:11 PM (b+df9)

42
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at November 26, 2015 12:06 PM (Zu3d9

Or the awesomeness of JMB in particular.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 26, 2015 12:11 PM (9jeGC)

43 and a discreet book-holder for hands-free reading in the bathroom.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:03 PM

And who exactly is your target market?

Posted by: olddog in mo at November 26, 2015 12:12 PM (c/3OG)

44 You are right, BurtTC.

I still read real books in bed. Always a struggle to prop myself on my tummy and get the pillow/book adjusted just right, then the light... Invariably once I'm settled, I have to get up to pee!

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:12 PM (t5zYU)

45 When I was a yute, I had a book of some 120 pages of weird patents. Water wings for horses, self-propelled bath-tubs, swing-operated waching machines, self tipping hats.

Posted by: Snoodling World Champion 1997 at November 26, 2015 12:12 PM (k9qR4)

46 those key socks look uncomfortable......

Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel at November 26, 2015 12:12 PM (0O7c5)

47 For a buffet buddy, there are plates with notches on them in one corner and you slip in your wine glass there. Then you hold your silverware in the hand that the plate is resting on.

So then you get all the good stuff before it runs out!

Eat well and be happy and thankful today to Ace and his horde!

Posted by: PJ at November 26, 2015 12:13 PM (cHuNI)

48 Elderly Ellie May:

http://tinyurl.com/ndrumu8

o.O

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:13 PM (t5zYU)

49 Willowed on the last thread:

The thing that probably bothers me the most is knowing what's going to happen to Ted's daughter, the state cop's wife. She's sweet, adorably cute, and obviously quite capable of handing all sorts of trouble. We know how this goes though, because season 1 took place... what, 20 or 30 years later?

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 11:50 AM (Dj0WE)

I wish they would give her character more to do. We see her chiefly as a cancer victim, but you know she's capable of a lot more.

And I'm not sure I understand the connection you're making between season 2 and season 1. Perhaps there's some details about season 1 I've forgotten.

Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:14 PM (SYNdO)

50 If you're exercising aggressively enough for it to matter you're not going to be reading.

As for the other form of exertion...'hands-free' reading. Ahem.

Happy Thanksgiving. No avoiding the relatives by hiding out in the crapper, got it?
Posted by: JEM at November 26, 2015 12:06 PM (o+SC1)

By exercising aggressively, do you mean jumping off mountains and bridges and all that sort of silly nonsense they show gen-xers doing on mountain dew and fitbit commercials?

Then no, not aggressively exercising. But sitting on a stationary bike, or walking on a treadmill... yes. I do both. No aggression required.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:14 PM (Dj0WE)

51 When you're in the mood for some serious inventions, call me.

Posted by: Clockboy at November 26, 2015 12:15 PM (YQ7o1)

52 I wish they would give her character more to do. We see her chiefly as a cancer victim, but you know she's capable of a lot more.

And I'm not sure I understand the connection you're making between season 2 and season 1. Perhaps there's some details about season 1 I've forgotten.
Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:14 PM (SYNdO)

The female cop in season 1 is her daughter.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:15 PM (Dj0WE)

53 Yeah, once the trench lines froze in the fall of 1914, both sides got real "inventive" trying to break the stalemate.

While both airplanes and submarines existed before the war, that was when they were really perfected, and assumed their modern roles that we still know today.

Posted by: rickl at November 26, 2015 12:15 PM (sdi6R)

54 Those would be "socculae", right?

Posted by: Kindltot at November 26, 2015 12:15 PM (q2o38)

55 Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:07 PM (t5zYU)

If I have some downtime.....yes. but have at it if you have a burning desire to navigate the fetid swamp of internet cheerleader photos.

I have to figure out how to find the balance points for two pork rib roasts. They are going on the rotisserie, and will make a mess if they aren't balanced.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at November 26, 2015 12:15 PM (Zu3d9)

56 I have a neighbor with a ratted-out Model-T truck. I say 'ratted-out', but it operates fine. Every time he comes rattling by, it warms my heart.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at November 26, 2015 12:16 PM (9mTYi)

57 It's all in the marketing.

You can crap in a paper bag, label it "Doo" and if you have a snazzy jingle, flashy lights and sexy women holding the bag in your tv commercial while Sam Jackson yells at the audience that they have to buy it, it would sell.

Posted by: Hairyback Guy at November 26, 2015 12:17 PM (ej1L0)

58 When you're in the mood for some serious inventions, call me.
Posted by: Clockboy
------------------

Sorry. Your fees are a bit high for me.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at November 26, 2015 12:17 PM (9mTYi)

59 48 Elderly Ellie May:

http://tinyurl.com/ndrumu8

Yes, Donna Douglas is quite elderly now, but I wouldn't say her appearance is "disturbing". To me, she just looks like a normal old person

Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:17 PM (SYNdO)

60 I have to figure out how to find the balance points for two pork rib roasts. They are going on the rotisserie, and will make a mess if they aren't balanced.
---

YUM!

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:17 PM (t5zYU)

61 I think the real question here, is WHY is Hobby Lobby selling socks?

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at November 26, 2015 12:17 PM (9mTYi)

62 I wanted gold iPad 64 GB & should've bought as soon as I woke up. I had to settle for silver from Target w/$150 gift card for accessories.
I could have bought gold one at Best Buy at $100 off but $50 is $50.

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 12:18 PM (sj3Ax)

63 I wish they would give her character more to do. We see her chiefly as a cancer victim, but you know she's capable of a lot more.

And I'm not sure I understand the connection you're making between season 2 and season 1. Perhaps there's some details about season 1 I've forgotten.
Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:14 PM (SYNdO)

The female cop in season 1 is her daughter.
Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:15 PM (Dj0WE)

Hopefully I won't spoil anything for those who haven't watched yet, but there were scenes in season 1 when she is talking to her dad, who works in a diner. Her father is obviously an ex-cop, and he makes references in season 1 to the events we get to see unfolding in season 2, some 20 or 30 years before the events of season 1.

I hope that makes sense. Or to those who haven't yet watched, that it doesn't and you can go in without ever knowing what the heck I'm talking about.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:18 PM (Dj0WE)

64 The female cop in season 1 is her daughter.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:15 PM (Dj0WE)

I did not know this. Did they mention this somewhere and I just missed it?

Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:18 PM (SYNdO)

65 Hopefully I won't spoil anything for those who haven't watched yet, but there were scenes in season 1 when she is talking to her dad, who works in a diner. Her father is obviously an ex-cop, and he makes references in season 1 to the events we get to see unfolding in season 2, some 20 or 30 years before the events of season 1.

Thank you for this explanation. I need to go back and watch this.

Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:20 PM (SYNdO)

66 I have to figure out how to find the balance points for two pork rib roasts. They are going on the rotisserie, and will make a mess if they aren't balanced.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at November 26, 2015 12:15 PM (Zu3d9)

Obviously somebody didn't heed the Good Reverand Sharpton's call to invite a muzzie into their home today.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 26, 2015 12:21 PM (9jeGC)

67 As for a reading light, get an LED headlamp that you can wear on your head. I bought one a few years ago during an extended power outage. I was able to navigate through the house, sit down and read books, and even heat up leftovers that were thawing in the freezer on the gas range that was unaffected. It's one of the best things I ever bought.

Posted by: rickl at November 26, 2015 12:22 PM (sdi6R)

68 Donna Douglas died Jan 1 this year. She was 82 years old. Of course she was no longer a young hottie and people should not expect it.

Posted by: Vic-we have no party at November 26, 2015 12:22 PM (t2KH5)

69 BurtTC & Oregon Muse,
Fargo! I didn't watch Season 1 & have no intention to pay for it. FX should put Season 1 on instead of same stupid movie all day again & again today.

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 12:22 PM (sj3Ax)

70
Yes, Donna Douglas is quite elderly now, but I wouldn't say her appearance is "disturbing". To me, she just looks like a normal old person

My ol' chum, sit down; I have bad news for you..

Posted by: Soothsayer the autoresponsebot at November 26, 2015 12:24 PM (S2LZH)

71 A "Jump To Conclusions" mat. You see, it would be this mat that you would put on the floor... and would have different CONCLUSIONS written on it that you could JUMP TO!

Posted by: Tom Smykowski at November 26, 2015 12:25 PM (zc3Db)

72 Best extraneous invention - The Bump Stock

Posted by: Kreplach at November 26, 2015 12:25 PM (C4y6D)

73
The female cop in season 1 is her daughter.

What show are you talking about?

Posted by: Soothsayer the autoresponsebot at November 26, 2015 12:25 PM (S2LZH)

74 The female cop in season 1 is her daughter.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:15 PM (Dj0WE)

I did not know this. Did they mention this somewhere and I just missed it?
Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:18 PM (SYNdO)

I don't pay attention to character names often enough, so while I'm sure one can piece it together from their names, I didn't notice. I read it somewhere before season 2 started, and so obviously they're not hiding the fact that this is a connection between the two seasons.

Sort of like when you see the Oliver Platt character in season 1, he's a big-time grocery store magnate, and at some point we get to see how he acquired the funds to start his business... which is a tie-in to the movie version of Fargo.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:25 PM (Dj0WE)

75 Happy Thanksgiving!

And an extremely belated high-five back to Y-Not from yesterday!

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at November 26, 2015 12:25 PM (bLnSU)

76 The female cop in season 1 is her daughter.

What show are you talking about?
Posted by: Soothsayer the autoresponsebot at November 26, 2015 12:25 PM (S2LZH)

Fargo

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:27 PM (Dj0WE)

77 Um, thanks Y-Not?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 26, 2015 12:27 PM (LUgeY)

78
Young Cuomo is a fascist. The posters hit too close to home for these Leftist Totalitarians. The tv show will give people ideas..

Remember V?
It began as obama's reign began. The similarities were uncanny (or canny, or whatever). Thus the popular series was abruptly canceled. That's what I believe, anyway.

Posted by: Soothsayer the autoresponsebot at November 26, 2015 12:28 PM (S2LZH)

79
Yes, Donna Douglas is quite elderly now, but I
wouldn't say her appearance is "disturbing". To me, she just looks like a
normal old person

Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:17 PM (SYNdO)

Yeah, but her tits rubbing on her knees has to hurt.

Posted by: Nip Sip at November 26, 2015 12:29 PM (jJRIy)

80 I think the real question here, is WHY is Hobby Lobby selling socks?

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at November 26, 2015 12:17 PM (9mTYi)

Right. Wearing socks isn't a hobby. It's a full-time damned job.

Posted by: Snoodling World Champion 1997 at November 26, 2015 12:29 PM (k9qR4)

81 Its too cold to go without pants today.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 12:30 PM (39g3+)

82 If you have nothing nice to say about ISIS, don't say anything at all.

Posted by: Joyce Carole Goats at November 26, 2015 12:30 PM (YQ7o1)

83
Oh Fargo. Yeah I liked the first season. Entertaining nonsense.

Right now I enjoy Bosch, Hand of God, Frankenstein Chronicles and Ash V Evil Dead, and soon I'll be watching Into the Badlands and The Expanse.

Posted by: Soothsayer the autoresponsebot at November 26, 2015 12:31 PM (S2LZH)

84 It's not easy being green
But are 6 -0 on Thanksgiving, it would be a shame to break that

Posted by: Skip at November 26, 2015 12:32 PM (XRpjE)

85
As much as I like Fargo this season, it isn't as good as the first go 'round. There was an underlying sense of pervasive evil in the first season's story that I don't get this time. This season, it's just gang war with funny midwestern accents that we don't normally associate with organized crime.

As to casting, Bokeem Woodbine is surprisingly good, probably the best performance of his career. But he's like a black Ted McGinley, he shows up for movies/TV that are about to jump the shark. Kind of like Harold Perrineau.

And we don't have Martin Freeman this time. He did "hapless evil" SOOOOOOO well.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 26, 2015 12:33 PM (o98Jz)

86 Into the Badlands isn't that the post apocalyptic show where everyone lost and forgot how to make all guns?

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 12:33 PM (39g3+)

87 Someone needs to invent an Ewok Proof trash can.

Posted by: Marco Rubio at November 26, 2015 12:34 PM (byoyc)

88 Anyone else notice that the soldier posing with Brewster Body Shield was carrying a percussion rifle, maybe a Martini? I should think that was totally obsolete by the time of the Great War.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 26, 2015 12:34 PM (7MWCL)

89 So with Rubio being the only guy who's managed to actually use congress to make a dent in Obamacare, time for a second look? Or is this being over played?

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 12:36 PM (39g3+)

90 That Patent list is is very incomplete.

I had a coworker at the Patent Office who had the canonical file of valid, but twisted patents.

I'd be examining a complicated chemical process application, and he'd come in and slap a mind-bending but published patent on my desk.

To say nothing of applications that never saw the light of day. Ah, if the files in Boyers, PA could speak. That's where all the abandoned applications are filed.

Let me see if I can find my list of "out-there", but valid, patents.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at November 26, 2015 12:37 PM (u82oZ)

91
HBO keeps running this stupid bio special on Kareem AbdulJabberJaw. The whole thing is about how great he is despite what he endured.

What did he endure, you ask? Being black in the USA the latter half of the 20th century. And a Celtics fan in Boston called Jabbar, according to Jabbar, the n-word.

A truly harrowing experience...

Some people I wish would just drop dead.

Posted by: Soothsayer the autoresponsebot at November 26, 2015 12:37 PM (S2LZH)

92 Happy Thanksgiving Horde!

Ellie May got me through many a night as a youngster....

Posted by: BunkerinTheBurbs at November 26, 2015 12:38 PM (bA+CL)

93
Into the Badlands isn't that the post apocalyptic show where everyone lost and forgot how to make all guns?

Thanks for the mega spoiler, bro!!

Posted by: Soothsayer the autoresponsebot at November 26, 2015 12:38 PM (S2LZH)

94 �Someone needs to invent an Ewok Proof trash can.

Posted by: Marco Rubio

---

Angry that ace is able to dig up the dirt on you? Greasy little snake.

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at November 26, 2015 12:38 PM (YQ7o1)

95 81
Its too cold to go without pants today.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 12:30 PM (39g3+)

Pussy.

Posted by: Greenbay Packer's fan at November 26, 2015 12:39 PM (jJRIy)

96 Soothsayer,
I saw part of that special too & turned it off.
Who cares?

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 12:40 PM (sj3Ax)

97 Heh Salon took the Ace Thanksplaining article seriously. I'm not joking:

Conservative blogger Ace of Spades wrhote an entire treatise on how to deal with the miscreant liberals in your family when they use any of these "Vox xplainer" talking points. It's very elaborate and very, very serious...

Salon basically trolls the internet for clicks these days, but this is just hilarious.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 12:41 PM (39g3+)

98
It's lousy around here on holy days.

It's like we're on the Island of Misfit Toys waiting for Ace [Santa] to come by. Maybe he will..maybe he won't...

Posted by: Soothsayer the autoresponsebot at November 26, 2015 12:42 PM (S2LZH)

99 get an LED headlamp that you can wear on your head.
---------------

Concur. I use one when camping. Frees up the hands.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at November 26, 2015 12:42 PM (9mTYi)

100
Heh Salon took the Ace Thanksplaining article seriously.

Ha!

Posted by: Soothsayer the autoresponsebot at November 26, 2015 12:43 PM (S2LZH)

101 Right. Wearing socks isn't a hobby. It's a full-time damned job.
Posted by: Snoodling
------------------

Not only that, it shouldn't be left to amateurs.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at November 26, 2015 12:43 PM (9mTYi)

102
Pussy.
Posted by: Greenbay Packer's fan at November 26, 2015 12:39 PM (jJRIy)

Always love those fans who when it's like 20 degrees out there have their shirts off.

"Son, all that alcohol in your body isn't keeping you as warm as you think".

Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 12:43 PM (DrCtv)

103 And what the hell is this Graze box?

Overpriced hipster lunchables?

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 26, 2015 12:44 PM (9jeGC)

104 Into the Badlands isn't that the post apocalyptic show where everyone lost and forgot how to make all guns?

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 12:33 PM (39g3+)

It's a remake. I wish I was kidding, though the predecessor I saw in the late 90s was only a pilot.

It was (and is) *purely* an excuse for people who took fencing in college alongside drama to have something to do without having special sets.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at November 26, 2015 12:44 PM (bLnSU)

105 This is kinda cool...

My daughter is cooking Thanksgiving dinner as my b-day gift.

Nice surprise indeed.

Posted by: SMFH at November 26, 2015 12:44 PM (ahx2/)

106 12 bucks a box.

Nope.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 26, 2015 12:45 PM (9jeGC)

107 Weird acoustic radar machines. I Iikes the Japanese war tubas near the bottom.

http://tinyurl.com/nckfpuh

Posted by: The Great White Snark at November 26, 2015 12:45 PM (Nwg0u)

108 Posted by: SMFH at November 26, 2015 12:44 PM (ahx2/)

Congrats!

Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 12:46 PM (DrCtv)

109 And what the hell is this Graze box?

Overpriced hipster lunchables?

--

Basically, yeah.

It's sort of Paint By Numbers for cooking.

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:46 PM (t5zYU)

110 Detroit should have to wear the Washington Generals unis when they play on Thanksgiving.

Posted by: Garrett at November 26, 2015 12:46 PM (byoyc)

111 My daughter is cooking Thanksgiving dinner as my b-day gift.

Poor girl, she has no clue what she's in for, does she?

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 12:47 PM (39g3+)

112 "It's sort of Paint By Numbers for cooking."

Actually, I guess that's more Blue Apron, come to think of it.

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:47 PM (t5zYU)

113 SMFH,
Happy Birthday & Happy Thanksgiving!

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 12:48 PM (sj3Ax)

114 92 Happy Thanksgiving Horde!

Ellie May got me through many a night as a youngster....
Posted by: BunkerinTheBurbs at November 26, 2015 12:38 PM (bA+CL)

Fixed.

Posted by: rickl at November 26, 2015 12:48 PM (sdi6R)

115 Salon basically trolls the internet for clicks these days, but this is just hilarious.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 12:41 PM (39g3+)

Well, they are writing to us from an alternate reality where Bush took Gore to court in 2000 instead of vice-versa, and where Mary Mapes didn't lie about her sources and where white liberals calling Jindal "inauthentic" isn't creepy authoritarian racism.

Great, now I'm in a *mood* again.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at November 26, 2015 12:48 PM (bLnSU)

116 Always love those fans who when it's like 20 degrees out there have their shirts off.

"Son, all that alcohol in your body isn't keeping you as warm as you think".

Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 12:43 PM (DrCtv)

We never remember.

Posted by: Greenbay Packer's fan at November 26, 2015 12:48 PM (jJRIy)

117 Into the Badlands isn't that the post apocalyptic show where everyone lost and forgot how to make all guns?

Mrs. Muse and I tried to watch ItB. About 20 minutes into the first episode, after the Matrix-ripoff fight scene, and the action had shifted to the bad guy's Fortress of Doom, we asked 'Do we care at all about any of these guys?' When both of us answered 'no', that was the end of ItB.

Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:48 PM (SYNdO)

118 Happy Thanksgiving to my moron family. Hope you all have a very blessed day.

Posted by: jewells45 at November 26, 2015 12:49 PM (5fvBZ)

119 Thanks Carol : )

Posted by: SMFH at November 26, 2015 12:50 PM (ahx2/)

120 I want some Keysocks...but I can't go to Hobby Lobby. Should I just dress like a guy and go anyway or sneak in? Oh what is a gurl to do?

Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at November 26, 2015 12:51 PM (nbCFi)

121
Anyone else notice that the soldier posing with Brewster Body Shield was carrying a percussion rifle, maybe a Martini? I should think that was totally obsolete by the time of the Great War.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 26, 2015 12:34 PM (7MWCL)

At first I thought it was a misattributed photo of Ned Kelly's armor.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 26, 2015 12:51 PM (o98Jz)

122 we asked 'Do we care at all about any of these guys?' When both of us answered 'no', that was the end of ItB.

That's how I felt about Jessica Jones. Do not care.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 12:51 PM (39g3+)

123 Well, back to Call of Duty..

Posted by: SMFH at November 26, 2015 12:52 PM (ahx2/)

124 Blow-what Thread?

Posted by: Charlie Sheen at November 26, 2015 12:53 PM (2WoCi)

125 Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:48 PM (SYNdO)

Yeah, I figured as much. The only series I watch is TWD, but seeing the ads for that just turned me off and decided to skip it.

Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 12:53 PM (DrCtv)

126 Happy birthday SMFH!

Happy Thanksgiving all.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 26, 2015 12:53 PM (9jeGC)

127 Mrs. Muse and I tried to watch ItB. About 20 minutes into the first episode, after the Matrix-ripoff fight scene, and the action had shifted to the bad guy's Fortress of Doom, we asked 'Do we care at all about any of these guys?' When both of us answered 'no', that was the end of ItB.
Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:48 PM (SYNdO)

My interest level never got past the previews. Scowly oriental guy, tuffgrrrl redhead chick, beardy baron dude... and drama involving the baron's kid sleeping with one of his father's wives, or future wives.

All I could think was "gosh, if I wanted this much silly melodrama, I would watch Empire."

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 12:53 PM (Dj0WE)

128 Weird ass Russkie tank of WWI.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wwRXONxlU1Q

Very steampunk.

Posted by: The Great White Snark at November 26, 2015 12:53 PM (Nwg0u)

129 Ok. Desserts are done.

Time for hockey.

Posted by: Garrett at November 26, 2015 12:55 PM (byoyc)

130 I think Into the Borderlands is Game of Thrones for people who claim they don't like fantasy.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 12:55 PM (39g3+)

131 117 Into the Badlands isn't that the post apocalyptic show where everyone lost and forgot how to make all guns?

Mrs. Muse and I tried to watch ItB. About 20 minutes into the first episode, after the Matrix-ripoff fight scene, and the action had shifted to the bad guy's Fortress of Doom, we asked 'Do we care at all about any of these guys?' When both of us answered 'no', that was the end of ItB.
Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 12:48 PM (SYNdO)

Eh, it's OK for mindless entertainment but not much else.

Posted by: Insomniac - Pale Horse/Death 2016 at November 26, 2015 12:56 PM (kpqmD)

132 ...damn.
No live hockey til 1.

Posted by: Garrett at November 26, 2015 12:57 PM (byoyc)

133
Oh, and that rifle is probably a Springfield trap-door 45-70. Still obsolete compared to other WWI arms.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 26, 2015 12:57 PM (o98Jz)

134 Well, if ace is on Salon's radar, good for him. And some of their readers may stop over hear. I've seen a lot of complaints recently about the low quality of trolls, so we should be welcoming of any large influx of regulars from Salon or Vox.

They're just like the Pilgrims on the Mayflower, I'm sure.

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at November 26, 2015 12:57 PM (YQ7o1)

135 Seems to me if there was a place that had no guns, learning how to use a bow and arrow or a crossbow would serve you a lot better than trying to learn sword fighting.

Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 12:59 PM (DrCtv)

136 C'mon Lions. Help Chip Kelly get closer to "retirement."

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:59 PM (t5zYU)

137 105 This is kinda cool...

My daughter is cooking Thanksgiving dinner as my b-day gift.

Nice surprise indeed.
Posted by: SMFH at November 26, 2015 12:44 PM (ahx2/)
---
Happy ThanksBirthday SMFH!

My mom's b-day was Tuesday and I made her lamb curry. Today I'm "helping" with the Thanksgiving feast.

I was politely asked to leave the kitchen.

Posted by: All Hail Eris at November 26, 2015 12:59 PM (8519N)

138 Well, if ace is on Salon's radar, good for him. And some of their readers may stop over hear.

That's what I figure. At the very least, we'll get a new and different batch of silly trolls to mock.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 12:59 PM (39g3+)

139 135 Seems to me if there was a place that had no guns, learning how to use a bow and arrow or a crossbow would serve you a lot better than trying to learn sword fighting.
Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 12:59 PM (DrCtv)
---
And let's not forget TREBUCHETS.

Posted by: All Hail Eris at November 26, 2015 01:00 PM (8519N)

140 There is always the National Dog Show, I guess.

Posted by: Garrett at November 26, 2015 01:00 PM (byoyc)

141 Perfect thread to give everyone an update on my "Pee Shield."

To hopefully stop the family dog, who is only 40 pounds, from destroying the lawn with his urine over the course of the long, Canadian winter, I've laid down several layers of leaves in the front yard, watered them and made a Pee Shield.

Theoretically, once snow arrives and I shovel just above the 'Pee Shield,' since that's the only place he's going to urinate, the urine should go through the snow and hopefully collect in the leaves and saving the nice, new grass I spent a month nurturing.

The shield has held up against a lot of wind so far and the dog actually seems to prefer going there rather than on the grass.

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 26, 2015 01:01 PM (AC0lD)

142 The Southerner (and Canadian) does have one easy answer to the "pilgrimz!" canard - the Pilgrims were proto-Yankees, so why care? Daniel Defoe wrote that they should have been clapped in irons and sent to Barbados.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at November 26, 2015 01:01 PM (J9qpF)

143 Well, they are writing to us from an alternate reality where Bush took Gore to court in 2000 instead of vice-versa, and where Mary Mapes didn't lie about her sources and where white liberals calling Jindal "inauthentic" isn't creepy authoritarian racism.

This is truly correct. The silly scrunt who wrote the Salon piece claims that the Democrat efforts to deal out Thanksgiving table talking points to their followers are 'jokes' while ace's satire is 'deadly serious.'

Good lord, that's weapons-grade clueless.

Posted by: OregonMuse at November 26, 2015 01:01 PM (SYNdO)

144
Posted by: SMFH at November 26, 2015 12:44 PM (ahx2/)

Happy Birthday SFMH!!

In my mind, you're always 28.....

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at November 26, 2015 01:01 PM (AC0lD)

145 I want some Keysocks...but I can't go to Hobby Lobby. Should I just dress like a guy and go anyway or sneak in? Oh what is a gurl to do?

Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner

---

I mean you can't try on socks in any case. Might as well order them online. You're not losing anything by doing that.

Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at November 26, 2015 01:02 PM (YQ7o1)

146 Lions score first. They're just trying to get my hopes up.

Screw it. I think I'll have a beer before I go to work.

Posted by: Blano at November 26, 2015 01:03 PM (C3E0x)

147 I bought myself a Christmas present. A Benjamin Titan Nitro Piston air rifle. Reg. $169 on sale for $100 and a $10 rebate.

Posted by: Ronster at November 26, 2015 01:03 PM (mUa7N)

148 >>And let's not forget TREBUCHETS
.

As the cow comes flying over the Castle wall.

"RUN AWAY"!!!

Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 01:03 PM (DrCtv)

149 I bought myself a Christmas present. A Benjamin Titan Nitro Piston air rifle.

Colonel Moran approves

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 01:04 PM (39g3+)

150 Ellie May had a double barreled slingshot.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at November 26, 2015 01:04 PM (FkBIv)

151 148 >>And let's not forget TREBUCHETS
.

As the cow comes flying over the Castle wall.

"RUN AWAY"!!!
Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 01:03 PM (DrCtv)

Fetchez la vache.

Qua?

Fetchez la vache!

Posted by: Insomniac - Pale Horse/Death 2016 at November 26, 2015 01:05 PM (kpqmD)

152
And let's not forget TREBUCHETS.

Posted by: All Hail Eris at November 26, 2015 01:00 PM (8519N)

Kind of hard to conceal carry a trebuchet.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 26, 2015 01:05 PM (o98Jz)

153 Seems to me if there was a place that had no guns, learning how to use a bow and arrow or a crossbow would serve you a lot better than trying to learn sword fighting.
Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 12:59 PM (DrCtv)

But but but... they bought all those wires and harnesses. And stompy boots for the redhead. And how are we going to get closeups of scowly oriental dude's back tattoos if everyone is shooting from a distance?

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 01:05 PM (Dj0WE)

154 Kind of hard to conceal carry a trebuchet.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 26, 2015 01:05 PM (o98Jz)
---
Constitutional carry!

Posted by: All Hail Eris at November 26, 2015 01:06 PM (8519N)

155 Happy Birfday SMFH and Happy Thanksgiving to teh Horde.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at November 26, 2015 01:06 PM (LUgeY)

156 128 Weird ass Russkie tank of WWI.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wwRXONxlU1Q

Very steampunk.
Posted by: The Great White Snark at November 26, 2015 12:53 PM (Nwg0u)

The next video looks even better, but I don't speak Russkiye so I have no frickin' clue what they're talking about.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tie0MnVUCE0

Posted by: rickl at November 26, 2015 01:06 PM (sdi6R)

157 >>Kind of hard to conceal carry a trebuchet.

Not Derringer's design.

Posted by: Garrett at November 26, 2015 01:07 PM (byoyc)

158 Wait what?

Did anybody hear of the mass shooting in LA on Sunday?

16 shot.

Didn't fit the narrative I guess.

Posted by: RWC- Team BOHICA at November 26, 2015 01:08 PM (9jeGC)

159 153 Seems to me if there was a place that had no guns, learning how to use a bow and arrow or a crossbow would serve you a lot better than trying to learn sword fighting.
Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 12:59 PM (DrCtv)

But but but... they bought all those wires and harnesses. And stompy boots for the redhead. And how are we going to get closeups of scowly oriental dude's back tattoos if everyone is shooting from a distance?

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 01:05 PM (Dj0WE)

The redhead with the stompy boots...yowza!

Posted by: Insomniac - Pale Horse/Death 2016 at November 26, 2015 01:08 PM (kpqmD)

160 Kind of hard to conceal carry a trebuchet.

Gonna be a challenge with that longbow, too

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at November 26, 2015 01:08 PM (39g3+)

161 Happy birthday SMFH from DFW, and Happy Thanksgiving to all.

Posted by: Blano at November 26, 2015 01:09 PM (C3E0x)

162 154 Kind of hard to conceal carry a trebuchet.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 26, 2015 01:05 PM (o98Jz)
---
Constitutional carry!
Posted by: All Hail Eris at November 26, 2015 01:06 PM (8519N)

Dragging it around behind your Ford F-350 is not very discreet.

Posted by: Insomniac - Pale Horse/Death 2016 at November 26, 2015 01:09 PM (kpqmD)

163 Almost ready to hit the road to daughter's house for the Big Eating. Like I said on a previous thread, I dressed myself nicely for the occasion. Then I remembered ! Green Bay plays the stupid Chicago Bears tonight, and my son-in-law is a Bears fan.

Off with the nice clothes. On with the Jordy Nelson jersey. Enough of this Missus Nice Guy business.

Posted by: grammie winger, watching the fig tree at November 26, 2015 01:12 PM (dFi94)

164 The redhead with the stompy boots...yowza!
Posted by: Insomniac - Pale Horse/Death 2016 at November 26, 2015 01:08 PM (kpqmD)

She's very yowza, but I'm pretty much done with the whole "she's just as tough as any man" act that plays out everywhere these days.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 01:13 PM (Dj0WE)

165 159 153 Seems to me if there was a place that had no guns, learning how to use a bow and arrow or a crossbow would serve you a lot better than trying to learn sword fighting.
Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 12:59 PM (DrCtv)

But but but... they bought all those wires and harnesses. And stompy boots for the redhead. And how are we going to get closeups of scowly oriental dude's back tattoos if everyone is shooting from a distance?

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 01:05 PM (Dj0WE)

The redhead with the stompy boots...yowza!
Posted by: Insomniac - Pale Horse/Death 2016 at November 26, 2015 01:08 PM (kpqmD)

I'm pretty sure that requires a link, per the AoSHQ ~~Rules of Engagement~~ Style Guide.

Posted by: rickl at November 26, 2015 01:13 PM (sdi6R)

166
at a lull in the cooking, so stopping by to say that one of the things I am thankful for is this blog, and all the people who inhabit it.

I get most of my news here, and I also get two crucial things whenever I'm down: a renewed sense of resolve, and a pantswetting good laugh.

Happy Thanksgiving, all! <3

Posted by: barbarausa at November 26, 2015 01:16 PM (DyGWm)

167 to solve the very real problem of how to hold your plate, drink, and silverware while navigating through a buffet.

I have such an invention, I call it....... a tray, if you want details it will cost you millions and millions of dollars, or a coupon for Taco Bell, whichever you have handy.

Posted by: All Teh Meh at November 26, 2015 01:17 PM (uaANl)

168 I'm pretty sure that requires a link, per the AoSHQ Rules of Engagement Style Guide.

Try this one:

http://tinyurl.com/qekscto

Posted by: Insomniac - Pale Horse/Death 2016 at November 26, 2015 01:18 PM (kpqmD)

169 Stop Sloot-shaming me!

Posted by: Oscar Pistorious at November 26, 2015 01:22 PM (YQ7o1)

170 Seriously- is Season One of Fargo worth buying DVD for $9.99? It's at Amazon.

Thanks!

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 01:22 PM (sj3Ax)

171 Happy Thanksgiving fellow gun and religion clingers!

Posted by: USA at November 26, 2015 01:22 PM (tfM+W)

172 Basketball ref socks are white tube socks dyed black on top, foot portion is white.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian, home is where the heart is, on the bus at November 26, 2015 01:23 PM (P4OkF)

173 168
Try this one:

http://tinyurl.com/qekscto
Posted by: Insomniac - Pale Horse/Death 2016 at November 26, 2015 01:18 PM (kpqmD)

I approve. Lord, do I approve.

Posted by: rickl at November 26, 2015 01:23 PM (sdi6R)

174 I'm pretty sure that requires a link, per the AoSHQ Rules of Engagement Style Guide.

Try this one:

http://tinyurl.com/qekscto
Posted by: Insomniac - Pale Horse/Death 2016 at November 26, 2015 01:18 PM (kpqmD)

Very good. Stupid google images search, it didn't matter how specific I got with my search terms never found this pic.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 01:23 PM (Dj0WE)

175 Oh, and that rifle is probably a Springfield trap-door 45-70. Still obsolete compared to other WWI arms.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 26, 2015 12:57 PM (o98Jz)

Thanks. Looked up the trap-door 45-70. So the external, side-mounted hammer, evidently a hold-over from percussion rifles, strikes a lever on a little bell crank which then drives the firing pin forward into the primer. Talk about a roundabout way of doing things.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 26, 2015 01:24 PM (7MWCL)

176 >>>I have such an invention, I call it....... a tray, if you want details it will cost you millions and millions of dollars, or a coupon for Taco Bell, whichever you have handy.

Yeah, @12. There must be something Y-not's left out. That doen't compute.

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at November 26, 2015 01:25 PM (YQ7o1)

177 I think a little snooze might be in order.

Posted by: MTF at November 26, 2015 01:27 PM (RkHvD)

178 Seriously- is Season One of Fargo worth buying DVD for $9.99? It's at Amazon.

Thanks!
Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 01:22 PM (sj3Ax)

Definitely! It's a great show, and manages to get the tone that existed in the movie right. Just enough weirdness, and bloodthirsty action to keep anyone interested, even if the plot wasn't very well-laid out, which it is.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 26, 2015 01:28 PM (Dj0WE)

179 Seems to me if there was a place that had no guns,
learning how to use a bow and arrow or a crossbow would serve you a lot
better than trying to learn sword fighting.

Posted by: HH at November 26, 2015 12:59 PM (DrCtv)

Seems to me the notion of "forgetting" how to make guns is just silly. If ones knows of the existence of something, and is determined to copy it, it can be done. There are gunsmiths in Pakistan who will hand-build you a copy of an AK-47. One constant with humanity is that it tends to hang onto efficient methods of killing off other members of the race.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at November 26, 2015 01:28 PM (7MWCL)

180 I think the idea behind the Buffet Buddy was for use in social settings where there's a buffet. I've never seen trays outside of institutional dining or certain buffet style restaurants, myself. Never at a party, anyway.

So it needs to be something that you can use one-handed - so you can shake hands/meet and greet at a party - and also be able to hold a wine glass w/o sloshing.

The plates with the notches are close, although I don't think they'd accommodate the napkins and silverware.

I can't remember if my old boss' idea involved something suspended from your neck or shoulders.

As I said, silly invention.

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 01:29 PM (t5zYU)

181 Well, my lazy ass just did a 4.9lb turkey breast in a pressure cooker. 20 min + slow cool down. And it was just right -- delicious. And no worries about not being moist.

With a big ass pressure cooker, which they make, you could do a small whole turkey.

Posted by: publius (not Breitbart publius) at November 26, 2015 01:29 PM (dvuhZ)

182 BurtTC,
Thank you!

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 01:30 PM (sj3Ax)

183 So, neighbor below moved out yesterday. In the middle of the night his smoke alarms all went off...

So, am thankful that the fire dept. came by to get in and turn them off (thankfully it was just a problem with the wiring...).

Posted by: The Alarming Hat at November 26, 2015 01:30 PM (vBeA5)

184 The Lions are lookin' pretty good.

Posted by: mrp at November 26, 2015 01:30 PM (JBggj)

185 Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Posted by: The Thanful Hat at November 26, 2015 01:31 PM (vBeA5)

186 Thanksgiving elbows?????????

Posted by: Diogenes at November 26, 2015 01:31 PM (VAVIJ)

187 During both wars, weren't there some senior British officerswhose job was to keep Winnie from annoying the engineers with hair rain schemes?

Posted by: Fox2! at November 26, 2015 01:32 PM (f4mjo)

188 It's so cold in here I have to wear pants. It is cold because every time the fire starts in the fire box, I turn the thermostat down two degrees. I turn the thermostat down because.....

and that is why I have to wear socks, because otherwise my feet get cold, and when my feet get cold, blood circulation to my feet stops, and when that happens for very long the evil doctors cut my feet off for the insurance money.

See?

Posted by: Vergil Honestly Jr at November 26, 2015 01:32 PM (jfTJ4)

189 18 ... I'm curious about when the 1911s will be offered, the price, and what their condition is. I assume they will, stupidly, have to go through an FFL instead of delivery to your door like with the Garands. Inquiring minds and all that.

Posted by: JTB at November 26, 2015 01:36 PM (FvdPb)

190 >>> During both wars, weren't there some senior British officerswhose job was to keep Winnie from annoying the engineers with hair rain schemes?

The man was always willing to entertain new fanged Nazi killing gizmos.

Posted by: fluffy at November 26, 2015 01:36 PM (AfsKp)

191 Trapdoor was the proposed conversion of the US rifle-musket that was adopted. There were ungodly numbers of them left after the Civil war, and the Army was cutting back in budget and did not want to get left behind.
Of course, first they reduced the caliber, twice, and then tried various modifications of bands and stock. After a while, the only original type fittings were the lock-plate, the cleaning rod and the butt-stock. Then they modified the rod and changed the lock-plate too.

As far as modifications go, it is a little more elegant a solution than the Werndl, the French Tabatier and the Snyder modifications.

Posted by: Kindltot at November 26, 2015 01:37 PM (q2o38)

192 BurtTC,
I ordered Fargo DVD. I had a few smaller items in my shopping cart I had forgotten about.

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 01:39 PM (sj3Ax)

193 Our Lenox gas furnace in the house has a fried motherboard. I ordered one ($272US) and it won't be here until early next week. Fortunately, the temp here in ETEX is 71 degrees and calling for rain, so not cold in house. I am cooking dressing in the travel trailer oven, sort of look forward to that tradition each Thanksgiving. No way I'm putting a second oven in the house to use once a year.

Posted by: Eromero at November 26, 2015 01:39 PM (b+df9)

194 Oh, and AOP, if you have the option of getting a trapdoor, they are a hoot to shoot. Easy to reload for, too.

Posted by: Kindltot at November 26, 2015 01:40 PM (q2o38)

195 wackiest invention of all time: marxism, now working on its second 100 million murdered!

Posted by: musical jolly chimp at November 26, 2015 01:42 PM (WTSFk)

196 Reminds me of the crotchless, boobless lingerie I bought my wife for Christmas 2 years ago.

Posted by: Vbjonny at November 26, 2015 01:42 PM (NX9H4)

197 I read Squanto story at WSJ. I usually skip the editorial page.

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 01:42 PM (sj3Ax)

198 I had an idea for an invention. Every Valentines Day, people send roses and flowers to their sweet heart. If I had money, and a lot of land, I would plant thorn bushes, Honey Locust Trees and Hawthorns. I would start a business to send a bouquet of thorns to your ex or anyone else who has done you wrong. Maybe even Poison Ivy. I am sure this is a recipe for some one to get rich.

Posted by: nannyhag at November 26, 2015 01:43 PM (Queum)

199 actually, islam might take the palm for looniest and most murderous invention. stay tuned...

Posted by: musical jolly chimp at November 26, 2015 01:44 PM (WTSFk)

200 Vergil Honesty,
I agree if your feet are cold, you're cold all over.

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 01:47 PM (sj3Ax)

201 Hey, are any of you getting the Lions/Eagles game broadcast in Spanish. Commercials are English everything else espanol'

Posted by: Wind Breaker at November 26, 2015 01:48 PM (8f5z5)

202 I must protest! I googled Elly May Clampett, and yes, pictures came up of her in later years. But unsettling? She looks healthy and smiling and like a lovely older woman. What's so unsettling? She passed away in January, 2015 at the age of 82. Rest in Peace, Donna Douglas. You entertained America and the world. God bless.

Posted by: Anonymous-9 at November 26, 2015 01:48 PM (vmHHv)

203
I'm on just glass of wine 2. I better get with it if I am going to invent something.

Or just drink with no purpose. Yeah, that's better.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at November 26, 2015 01:48 PM (ODxAs)

204 Thank you Carol. You are a very kind person to notice me. I hope your Thanksgiving is joyous, and your rose bushes glorious. I can imagine they are.

Posted by: Vergil Honestly Jr at November 26, 2015 01:50 PM (jfTJ4)

205 >>What's so unsettling?

The pictures I found featured her dressed pretty much like Ellie May, complete with wig. YMMV, of course.

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 01:51 PM (t5zYU)

206 Though it is nice not having to listen to Joe and Troy.

Posted by: Wind Breaker at November 26, 2015 01:52 PM (8f5z5)

207
Donna Dixon is dead?

Posted by: Soothsayer the autoresponsebot at November 26, 2015 01:52 PM (S2LZH)

208 Ellie May and Sky King's niece penny were 2 of my childhood fantasies.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 26, 2015 01:52 PM (DUoqb)

209 Reminds me of the crotchless, boobless lingerie I bought my wife for Christmas 2 years ago.

Posted by: Vbjonny at November 26, 2015 01:42 PM (NX9H4)

Pictureless revelations not allowed.

Posted by: Blano at November 26, 2015 01:53 PM (C3E0x)

210 Powers move towards 'grand coalition' against ISIS
France seeks cooperation with Russia against terror group, while Germany announces it will deploy personnel and equipment and the UK's Cameron says the time has come to join airstrikes in Syria.

Hum? Seems like someone is missing?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 26, 2015 01:54 PM (DUoqb)

211 >>206 Though it is nice not having to listen to Joe and Troy.

Where are you that you're getting the Spanish broadcast? Or did you maybe hit your Esp button on your tv remote?

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 01:54 PM (t5zYU)

212
Hardly a silly invention, but just finished installing the new oven that a big box store delivered yesterday.

Imagine my pleasure when the delivery guys informed me they were just delivering and not installing!

My favorite part of the instructions said "it is recommended that all electrical connections be made by a licensed, qualified electrical installer". Oh well, red to red, black to black, etc., right?

Threw the breaker back on and didn't smell any wires burning. Oven preheated fine. Success!

Good thing family doesn't arrive until tomorrow...

Posted by: Spun and Murky at November 26, 2015 01:54 PM (4DCSq)

213 IDF shoots firebomb terrorist dead in the act

IDF forces manage to shoot 19-year-old terrorist as he hurls lit firebomb at Israeli cars just north of Hevron, PA medics say he died.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 26, 2015 01:55 PM (DUoqb)

214 Vergil,
I'll let you know in the spring if my roses are glorious or more dead than alive! We've had two bad winters here in a row.

My favorite pink/white climbers were 10 years old & trained to the arbor. My best friend, because he's very tall, had to chop them off the arbor because they were dead. I finally had to cut back to below ankle level. They've recovered & aren't yet on arbor.

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 01:56 PM (sj3Ax)

215 I still read real books in bed. Always a struggle to prop myself on my tummy and get the pillow/book adjusted just right, then the light... Invariably once I'm settled, I have to get up to pee!
Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 12:12 PM (t5zYU)

funny, i am jealous, i had forgotten how wonderful sleeping or reading on my tummy, after many pregnancies and years of breastfeeding children.
i think tonight i'm going to try to arrange that.

Posted by: willow at November 26, 2015 01:57 PM (jOumW)

216 Obama: Syrian Refugees Are Like Pilgrims On The Mayflower

No, really theyre not.

Weasel Zippers

Syrian Refugees are to the Pilgrims like Fredo is to a Patriotic American

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 26, 2015 01:58 PM (DUoqb)

217 >>Posted by: Spun and Murky at November 26, 2015 01:54 PM

I'm impressed!

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 02:00 PM (t5zYU)

218 At mothers house. Yup, mom had the SAP on. It's next to the closed caption button. Thanks.

Posted by: Wind Breaker at November 26, 2015 02:00 PM (8f5z5)

219 Powers move towards 'grand coalition' against ISIS
France seeks cooperation with Russia against terror group, while Germany announces it will deploy personnel and equipment and the UK's Cameron says the time has come to join airstrikes in Syria.

Hum? Seems like someone is missing?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 26, 2015 01:54 PM (DUoqb)

For a JV team, they sure seem pretty powerful.

Has anybody wondered or written about why ISIS can hold their ground against all the world's great powers?

Posted by: Blano at November 26, 2015 02:01 PM (C3E0x)

220 Soothsayer,
Have you read Charlie Baker's new stand on Syrian refugees?
He still has no answers to vetting questions, but he's not going to stand in the way of them coming here!

Every Massachusetts resident call his office tomorrow
617-725-4005.

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 02:02 PM (sj3Ax)

221 These pieces of shit at Microsoft are trying to force download Windows 10.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 26, 2015 02:03 PM (4ErVI)

222 >>Yup, mom had the SAP on.

Yeah, well now you have to listen to Joe Buck... Let us know when you break and go back to Spanish!

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 02:03 PM (t5zYU)

223 Well, WW XXXV started 2 hours ago. I put the bird in at 7a then went to turkey fry at BIL's house. Wife not pleased 'coz I got oven time before her.

Posted by: olddog in mo at November 26, 2015 02:04 PM (c/3OG)

224 I am cooking dressing in the travel trailer oven, sort of look forward to that tradition each Thanksgiving. No way I'm putting a second oven in the house to use once a year.
-----------------
Ha! We have the same tradition. I had to move some beer out of the fridge in the camper (and into mih belly) to make room for casseroles last night, and we've been working the oven all day.

Cheers!

Posted by: BunkerinTheBurbs at November 26, 2015 02:04 PM (bA+CL)

225 Dack, i am unable to get mapquest anylonger and i can't find how to downlaod maps unless i upgrade to an approved program.

is that related to the windows 10 push?

Posted by: willow at November 26, 2015 02:05 PM (jOumW)

226 Willow,
I woke up one night in the middle of the night & started reading the ONT & read your daughter had been ill.
Is she fully recovered?
Happy Thanksgiving.

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 02:05 PM (sj3Ax)

227 I've been known to go sock commando.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at November 26, 2015 02:06 PM (kfcYC)

228 These pieces of shit at Microsoft are trying to force download Windows 10

Me being a dumbass voluntarily downloaded win 10. I have not installed it though. I keep getting reminded. Will not do so.

Posted by: Ronster at November 26, 2015 02:06 PM (mUa7N)

229 These pieces of shit at Microsoft are trying to force download Windows 10.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 26, 2015 02:03 PM (4ErVI)

I don't use windows any more, but does blocking all port 139 traffic at the firewall help?

Posted by: Snoodling World Champion 1997 at November 26, 2015 02:07 PM (k9qR4)

230 Yeah, just what I wanna hear at halftime....rap crap.

Guess I'll read for a few minutes.

Posted by: Blano at November 26, 2015 02:07 PM (C3E0x)

231 These pieces of shit at Microsoft are trying to force download Windows 10.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 26, 2015 02:03 PM (4ErVI)

the ONLY Windows computers I use have proprietary programs on them for my Dental Office and the Military and I have no idea how they might or might not work with Windows 10 so I am staying far far away from it like the plaque

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 26, 2015 02:07 PM (DUoqb)

232 225
Dack, i am unable to get mapquest anylonger and i can't find how to downlaod maps unless i upgrade to an approved program.

is that related to the windows 10 push?

Posted by: willow at November 26, 2015 02:05 PM (jOumW)

I'm not sure. I wasn't looking for anything out of the ordinary but these download screens keep opening.
I'm sure that it is happening on Thanksgiving is no mistake. They're thinking people have the computers on and aren't paying attention. Fuckers.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 26, 2015 02:08 PM (4ErVI)

233 Carol, she has to do mini chemo every 28 days, but after the last 2 years of evrything they shoved at her, this is mild, so while not totally free she is in remission, so we hope and pray . she is back in the nursing program so sheis moving forward .

ty happy thanksgiving to you and those of yours.

Posted by: willow at November 26, 2015 02:08 PM (jOumW)

234 These pieces of shit at Microsoft are trying to force download Windows 10

Me being a dumbass voluntarily downloaded win 10. I have not installed it though. I keep getting reminded. Will not do so.

Posted by: Ronster at November 26, 2015 02:06 PM (mUa7N)

I haven't downloaded it, but still get the reminders every day. And now the reminder box is bigger, and center screen unlike the priors.

Posted by: Blano at November 26, 2015 02:08 PM (C3E0x)

235
IDF shoots firebomb terrorist dead in the act

IDF forces manage to shoot 19-year-old terrorist as he hurls lit firebomb at Israeli cars just north of Hevron, PA medics say he died.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 26, 2015 01:55 PM (DUoqb)

From the bullet, or from being burned to death when he dropped the Molotov at his feet? Because that shit would be funny as hell.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 26, 2015 02:09 PM (o98Jz)

236 This rapper on the Detroit game sucks ass.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 26, 2015 02:09 PM (4ErVI)

237 resumed her clinicals*

Posted by: willow at November 26, 2015 02:10 PM (jOumW)

238 This rapper on the Detroit game sucks ass.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 26, 2015 02:09 PM (4ErVI)

Has he lapsed into Black Lives matter shit yet?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 26, 2015 02:10 PM (DUoqb)

239 This rapper on the Detroit game sucks ass.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 26, 2015 02:09 PM (4ErVI)

Has he lapsed into Black Lives matter shit yet?
Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 26, 2015 02:10 PM (DUoqb)

Is that music?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 26, 2015 02:11 PM (DUoqb)

240 Actually, the 'Goober' idea is a cute one. 'We promise to show up in a
car that's nothing like anything you've ever been in before'.

Win lotto, buy Bentley, surprise Uber customers.

Posted by: DaveA at November 26, 2015 02:12 PM (DL2i+)

241 236: Yes he does. My daughter says that's all they could get at short notice. He is the worst.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at November 26, 2015 02:12 PM (ucDmr)

242 I saw these in a store the other day. Seems to be the buffet buddy idea.

http://tinyurl.com/p7d6pcy.

Posted by: Aviator at November 26, 2015 02:12 PM (c7vUv)

243 Oh goodness, sorry to hear about your daughter, willow!

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 02:13 PM (t5zYU)

244

The 11-year-old Palestinian boy who stabbed a light rail guard with his cousin, 14, in Jerusalems Pisgat Zeev two weeks ago, told the Shin Bet (Israel Security Agency) that the duo were motivated by revenge to die a martyr, a transcript of his interrogation revealed.

They are taught these things at their mother's tit

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 26, 2015 02:13 PM (DUoqb)

245 It's music for low IQ idiots.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 26, 2015 02:13 PM (4ErVI)

246 I saw all the pee wee football players. They managed to find the last white kid playing football in Detroit.

Posted by: tu3031 at November 26, 2015 02:13 PM (EDYaR)

247 back out to finish prep work for incoming .

keep the peace fellow morons and ettes.

Posted by: willow at November 26, 2015 02:13 PM (jOumW)

248 THAT'S IT, Aviator!

The dream has been realized!!!

Posted by: Y-not at November 26, 2015 02:14 PM (t5zYU)

249 Willow,
That's The Best Thanksgiving you can have.

I'm so happy for you & your daughter & family.

Posted by: Carol at November 26, 2015 02:15 PM (sj3Ax)

250 Y-not
I took the turkey out of the Big Easy infra red cooker. It is resting for a bit while I have a drink or two. Looks great, hope it tastes as good as it looks. Have you further considered one of these?

Posted by: Aviator at November 26, 2015 02:15 PM (c7vUv)

251 39 i loved ellie mae in the beverly hillbillies but she seemed to be stuck in that roll in real life...her hair style never really changed

Posted by: phoenixgirl

She played a very small part in an Outer Limits (I think). She played the horribly disfigured hospital patient who gets her face-bandages removed at the end. She looked exactly a beautiful as real life, but get this........ everyone else was grotesque! I love all that old sci fi. It's a cookbook!!! It's earth!!! It's Adam and Eve!!!! All these cans and no can opener!!!

I've never see her in anything else.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at November 26, 2015 02:17 PM (kfcYC)

252 So we're at Moms, (Greek side of the family) and she rolls out the stuffed Grape Leaves and Greek Anti Pasti appetizers. I think I just died and went to heaven.

Posted by: Wind Breaker at November 26, 2015 02:18 PM (8f5z5)

253 21 Two things that do not appear to have been invented yet, and are related:

A competent book-holder for exercise equipment, and a discreet book-holder for hands-free reading in the bathroom.

Posted by: BurtTC

Can't your wife do anything right?

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at November 26, 2015 02:18 PM (kfcYC)

254 Oh Good Lord. Just took brined, smoked turkey out of smoker. resting now. Only 3.5 hours, @ c.280F. juices running clear. All systems 'Go' - initial taste test indicate total succulent success.

Posted by: goatexchange at November 26, 2015 02:18 PM (Nd4YY)

255 Windows released a pretty big update to 10 a couple weeks ago, it seems to have fixed a lot of problems, at least it has on my work laptop, finally upgraded for good, Bluetooth is still wonky but everything else seems solid. If you don't want it you should be able to turn off the reminders by right clicking on the taskbar, choose properties, click customize notification area, then find the windows symbol icon and choose don't show notification or icon, hopefully that will turn it off.

Posted by: All Teh Meh at November 26, 2015 02:21 PM (uaANl)

256 150 Ellie May had a double barreled slingshot.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr.

High Caliber, and probably a nice small bore.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at November 26, 2015 02:21 PM (kfcYC)

257 Is there anything stuffed that doesnt taste great?

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at November 26, 2015 02:22 PM (iQIUe)

258 Has anyone received any combat casualty reports from Jane's house yet?

I'm eagerly awaiting a report of the festivities.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 26, 2015 02:22 PM (4ErVI)

259 68 Donna Douglas died Jan 1 this year. She was 82 years old. Of course she was no longer a young hottie and people should not expect it.

Posted by: Vic-we have no party

I probably should give some serious consideration to taking her off my bucket list.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at November 26, 2015 02:25 PM (kfcYC)

260 My usual fix for windows problems:

dd if=/dev/zero of=/dev/ada0 bs=100m

Posted by: Snoodling World Champion 1997 at November 26, 2015 02:25 PM (k9qR4)

261 WHERE IS MY FLYING CAR
???!!!

Posted by: BurtTC

Any car can fly, once.

https://www.youtube.com/
watch?v=pdFXWZNIBVA

https://www.youtube.com/
watch?v=1bqSTjs1Ym4

Posted by: DaveA at November 26, 2015 02:28 PM (DL2i+)

262 Back to the Spanish Broadcast. Joe and Troy suck.

Posted by: Wind Breaker at November 26, 2015 02:29 PM (8f5z5)

263
All these cans and no can opener!!!

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at November 26, 2015 02:17 PM (kfcYC)

*sigh* All you need is a slab of concrete or a reasonably flat and abrasive rock.

Turn the can over so the crimped side of the can faces the concrete.

Scrub the can across the concrete until it breaks through the crimped sheet metal. Only takes about 30 seconds or so.

Turn the can over and carefully squeeze the can so it opens the gap enough to get a thumbnail underneath. Pry off the lid.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 26, 2015 02:30 PM (o98Jz)

264
I remember when morons were comparing Diana Riggs today to the Diana Riggs of the Avengers which was 50 years ago. Sheesh!

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at November 26, 2015 02:30 PM (iQIUe)

265 Salon writes about Ace's Thanksgivingmanship post:

http://tinyurl.com/od5sojk

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 26, 2015 02:31 PM (4ErVI)

266 I saw all the pee wee football players. They managed to find the last white kid playing football in Detroit.

Posted by: tu3031 at November 26, 2015 02:13 PM (EDYaR)

Token.

Posted by: Blano at November 26, 2015 02:31 PM (C3E0x)

267 Obviously somebody didn't heed the Good Reverand Sharpton's call to invite a muzzie into their home today.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 26, 2015 12:21 PM (9jeGC)

I hope his admonition included the warning not to play Jenga with him.

Posted by: Michael Rittenhouse at November 26, 2015 02:33 PM (EqERa)

268 Windows released a pretty big update to 10 a couple weeks ago, it seems to have fixed a lot of problems, at least it has on my work laptop, finally upgraded for good, Bluetooth is still wonky but everything else seems solid. If you don't want it you should be able to turn off the reminders by right clicking on the taskbar, choose properties, click customize notification area, then find the windows symbol icon and choose don't show notification or icon, hopefully that will turn it off.

Posted by: All Teh Meh at November 26, 2015 02:21 PM (uaANl)

Thank you!!

Posted by: Blano at November 26, 2015 02:35 PM (C3E0x)

269 All these cans and no can opener!!!

No P-38?

Posted by: BunkerinTheBurbs at November 26, 2015 02:39 PM (bA+CL)

270 263
All these cans and no can opener!!!

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at November 26, 2015 02:17 PM (kfcYC)

*sigh* All you need is a slab of concrete or a reasonably flat and abrasive rock.

Turn the can over so the crimped side of the can faces the concrete.

Scrub the can across the concrete until it breaks through the crimped sheet metal. Only takes about 30 seconds or so.

Turn the can over and carefully squeeze the can so it opens the gap enough to get a thumbnail underneath. Pry off the lid.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur

Your advice is excellent for someone on present-day earth with access to cans, concrete and thumbnails.

However: 'CANS' is set a thousand years from now on an alien world made of styrofoam and the human's had evolved to the point where they had no thumbnails. The first movie in the trilogy comes out summer of 2017.

Posted by: Dirks Strewn at November 26, 2015 02:41 PM (kfcYC)

271 Are the Eagles really this bad?

Posted by: Wind Breaker at November 26, 2015 02:42 PM (8f5z5)

272
I saw all the pee wee football players. They managed to find the last white kid playing football in Detroit.

Posted by: tu3031 at November 26, 2015 02:13 PM (EDYaR)

Token.

Posted by: Blano at November 26, 2015 02:31 PM (C3E0x)

*First day of basketball practice at the enlightened liberal academy the Punahou School in Hawaii*

"We need a ringer. Get the black kid, they all play basketball. You know, the stoner from Indonesia. Barry, I think his name is."

*watches Barry shoot free-throws*

"Okay, maybe he's having an off-day."

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 26, 2015 02:46 PM (o98Jz)

273 Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 26, 2015 02:46 PM (o98Jz)

I remember Barry. Skinny kid kept to himself. Mumbled a lot. But man no one warmed a bench like Barry! Seriously. They put a plaque on the bench to memoralize him.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at November 26, 2015 02:49 PM (4ErVI)

274 A cartoon-"The Last Thanksgiving"

http://iotwreport.com/byo/

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at November 26, 2015 02:49 PM (No/ki)

275
Are the Eagles really this bad?

Posted by: Wind Breaker at November 26, 2015 02:42 PM (8f5z5)

Hey, fuck you asshole!

Posted by: Don Henley at November 26, 2015 02:51 PM (o98Jz)

276 Hey, I always liked the Eagles. About the only ones I'd pay money to see, after Steely Dan of course. Goes without saying, that does. Well, on 3rd John Wayne movie of the day and just finished our Thanksgiving meal. Lordy! So much to be thankful for! Even if I don't live another day, this has been one for the record books. Back to work tomorrow.

Posted by: Eromero at November 26, 2015 03:20 PM (b+df9)

277 I was politely asked to leave the kitchen.

Posted by: All Hail Eris at November 26, 2015 12:59 PM (8519N)
HA. Memories. Every time I went into the kitchen when my mother was cooking she would look at me and ask "what are You doing in here?". RIP, I am still trying to make that somehow affectionate and accepting.

Posted by: gracepc at November 26, 2015 03:54 PM (OU4q6)

278 What about a rug labeled with answers to questIons printed on it. You could "Jump To Conclusions!"

I can't believe nobody's thought of this before.

Posted by: Rihar at November 26, 2015 04:46 PM (+ao6J)

279 The 11-year-old Palestinian boy who stabbed a light rail guard with his cousin,

A knife would have been more effective.

Posted by: Insomniac - Pale Horse/Death 2016 at November 26, 2015 05:08 PM (A6ryA)

280 whats up ace?

nice article bro

Posted by: AHFF Geoff at November 26, 2015 05:45 PM (07d4p)

281 An in-law of one of my best friends invented / patented the beer can chicken contraption after going on a duck hunt with our friends and they couldn't get the beer can to balance on the grill. The progression of the story from that day is pretty awesome. Only in America and he's a good guy so it makes it even better.

Posted by: Max Rockatansky at November 26, 2015 05:52 PM (/8r1I)

282 Is there anything stuffed that doesnt taste great?

Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at November 26, 2015 02:22 PM (iQIUe)

Got your hot stuffed but-load right here. Taste Great?

Posted by: Obamao at November 26, 2015 06:00 PM (T78UI)

283

Posted by: Burnt Toast at November 26, 2015 06:00 PM (T78UI)

284 So.

Kassich says Trump is Hitler?

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That at November 26, 2015 06:31 PM (Xo1Rt)

285 I look at those more recent Donna Douglas Pics and I see her still shining through.

*sniff*

RIP Elly Mae.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That at November 26, 2015 06:36 PM (Xo1Rt)

286 What? Everybody eating or something?

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That at November 26, 2015 06:37 PM (Xo1Rt)

287 OH. Dead thread. I thought I was at the top one.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That at November 26, 2015 06:37 PM (Xo1Rt)

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