Awful Candidate Now Faking Awful Southern Accent to Appeal to Awful, Stupid Voters Who Don't Know She's a New York Girl Who Was Born in Illinois

It's not a thick fake southern accent. Just a subtle fake southern accent.

She's droppin' a lot of g's, soundin' like she's a-fixin' to some yelin' and scoldin'.

We can only hope we'll hear a return of the fake black accent.

Posted by: Ace at 07:12 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 1st

Posted by: eureka! is troubled these days at October 19, 2015 07:13 PM (g1MTt)

2 Hah! Been a while.
...
So the corrupt harridan is lyin' as opposed to her usual lying?

Posted by: eureka! is troubled these days at October 19, 2015 07:14 PM (g1MTt)

3 She ain't no way tarred.

Posted by: Old Blue at October 19, 2015 07:15 PM (9iR5/)

4 She truly is "tard".

Posted by: Bosk at October 19, 2015 07:16 PM (n2K+4)

5 I'd fake a Yankee accent, but I don't know how.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 19, 2015 07:16 PM (LUgeY)

6 Lying liars who lie!

Posted by: Killerdog at October 19, 2015 07:16 PM (tvdXm)

7 Hopefully Slow Joe gets in so we get the southern version of 'put y'all back in chains!!!'

Posted by: Doom Rider at October 19, 2015 07:16 PM (ImLO6)

8 Y'all come back real soon.

Posted by: Mister Ghost at October 19, 2015 07:17 PM (aCCKJ)

9 I'd like to see her tarred. And feathered.

Posted by: rickl at October 19, 2015 07:17 PM (sdi6R)

10 She didn't break out into Swing Low, Sweet Chariot, did she?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 19, 2015 07:17 PM (LUgeY)

11 Is Hillary! going to get her face ironed? It's getting mighty wrinkly.

Posted by: Killerdog at October 19, 2015 07:17 PM (tvdXm)

12 Y'all know there are vast, shadowy forces movin against poor ole ma.

Posted by: Hikary at October 19, 2015 07:18 PM (LYCUN)

13 "Awful Candidate Now Faking Awful Southern Accent to Appeal to Awful, Stupid Voters"

... or as some people call it , "Monday!".

Posted by: Optimizer at October 19, 2015 07:18 PM (/q6+P)

14 So, is the Hildebeest going with a Chicago drug/thug black accent, or a Southern black accent? Will she use the N word?

Posted by: Old Blue at October 19, 2015 07:19 PM (9iR5/)

15 Opening now - Shrillary playing:

Redneck Weeble

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 19, 2015 07:19 PM (zc3Db)

16 How much money would it take to make this worthless hag go away?

Posted by: Northernlurker at October 19, 2015 07:19 PM (tMrac)

17 I was askeerd to look cause I heard there was nood cankles here.

Posted by: freaked at October 19, 2015 07:20 PM (BO/km)

18 HOW CAN ANYONE FALL FOR THIS SHIT? What if I were to slap them and say, "You're being played by this 3rd rate, vaudevillian condescension. Have you no dignity???"

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at October 19, 2015 07:20 PM (VJ3W8)

19 She didn't break out into Swing Low, Sweet Chariot, did she?

>>>

Is that you Lyle? What did I tell you about jumping around like a bunch of Kansas City faggots?

Posted by: Taggart at October 19, 2015 07:20 PM (JO9+V)

20 17
I was askeerd to look cause I heard there was nood cankles here.

Posted by: freaked at October 19, 2015 07:20 PM (BO/km)
-------------As well you should be. There is not enough eye bleach in the world to fix that.

Posted by: Old Blue at October 19, 2015 07:20 PM (9iR5/)

21 The only good thing about a Biden run would be we may get to hear a little more of the Delaware Destroyers.

She's been doing this shit for years, not like it's news. But I know, at least someone's mentioning it.

Posted by: Chupacabra at October 19, 2015 07:21 PM (QFjNO)

22 Maybe she can get arrested for that?

Posted by: Iblis at October 19, 2015 07:22 PM (9221z)

23 Fake accents for fake people.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 19, 2015 07:22 PM (LUgeY)

24 I have the mixed blessing of being born in Massachusetts and being raised in North Carolina - and now I live in Southern California. I have to tell you, you never really lose a proper Southern accent; it fades in and out, sometimes based on how tired I am, how angry I am (very few things in this world are more menacing than an slow redneck growl, I've learned), or whether I've recently watched a rerun of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour. I have to tell you, it wasn't until I was eight years old that I realized "damn Yankees" was two words, because I always heard them used together.

HAVING SAID ALL THAT, Hillary's pretended Southern-fried manner of speech is about as legitimate as my doctorate. I've heard Southern accents that were less fake tuning in to Steel Magnolias. No one down in God's Country are going to be fooled by her affectations.

Bless her black little heart.

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:22 PM (iIzG7)

25 10 She didn't break out into Swing Low, Sweet Chariot, did she?

She's all about the base

Posted by: Lone Starr at October 19, 2015 07:23 PM (BO/km)

26 Hillary is ALL ways taaaard!

Why do Democrats do this?

Obama does this when talking to a black audience - he gets all sing-songey Southern preacher.

Even Biden did it with his "They wanna put y'all in chainzzzzz" claim in 2012.

Posted by: Lizzy at October 19, 2015 07:23 PM (NOIQH)

27 I hope she does a series of "You Just Might Be A Redneck" jokes.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at October 19, 2015 07:23 PM (NeFrd)

28 Oh lord, please let the BLM clowns go after her for using black tongue; like black face, but of the voice? I know, reaching.

Posted by: Chupacabra at October 19, 2015 07:24 PM (QFjNO)

29 16 How much money would it take to make this worthless hag go away?
Posted by: Northernlurker at October 19, 2015 07:19 PM (tMrac)

___________________________

She's got more money than she'll ever need. This pant suited harpy wants POWER!

Posted by: CozMark at October 19, 2015 07:24 PM (CbGSW)

30 She's going to open her testimony later this week with a soul-stirring rendition of...

Nobody Knows Da Trouble I've Seen

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at October 19, 2015 07:25 PM (NeFrd)

31 The fact that nobody threw rotten fruit at TFG for singing at a funeral, I'm resigned to the fact that you can't be too racist when you're a Democrat.

Posted by: Chupacabra at October 19, 2015 07:25 PM (QFjNO)

32 Kinda subtle. But, then again, she sounds like the same screechy, lying bitch she always sounds like.

Posted by: tu3031 at October 19, 2015 07:25 PM (YFFpo)

33 Shrillary is a light-skinned American with no Southern accent ... unless she wanted to have one.

And she doesn't smell like the visitors in the Senate, though it might be the alcohol she spills all over herself that hides it.

Posted by: Hairy Reed at October 19, 2015 07:25 PM (zc3Db)

34 How much money would it take to make this worthless hag go away?
Posted by: Northernlurker
---
I have plenty of money. I crave the power and the adoration.

I will pluck you like the defenseless chicken that you are. And bedraggled, cold, hungry, naked you will feebly nestle up against my canckle, begging me to have pity upon you! Hahahahahah!!!

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at October 19, 2015 07:25 PM (VJ3W8)

35 "How much money would it take to make this worthless hag go away?

Better: how many times do I have to flush before that turd goes away for good?

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:25 PM (iIzG7)

36 HAVING SAID ALL THAT, Hillary's pretended
Southern-fried manner of speech is about as legitimate as my doctorate.
I've heard Southern accents that were less fake tuning in to Steel
Magnolias. No one down in God's Country are going to be fooled by her
affectations.

Bless her black little heart.

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:22 PM (iIzG7)

Indeed!

Posted by: Count de Monet at October 19, 2015 07:25 PM (JO9+V)

37 I'll have you know there's two l's in "yellin'"!

Posted by: J Yellen at October 19, 2015 07:25 PM (ftVQq)

38 Cue "Gone with the Wind" theme.

Posted by: eman at October 19, 2015 07:26 PM (/h6TI)

39 She's got more money than she'll ever need. This pant suited harpy wants POWER!

WTF's up wif dat? Hell, if I had her bazillions, I'd go buy Ginger Island, populate it with gingers and nobody'd ever see my ass again.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 19, 2015 07:27 PM (LUgeY)

40 >>>We can only hope we'll hear a return of the fake black accent.<<<

#BlackAccentsMatter

Posted by: a subsidiary of BLM at October 19, 2015 07:28 PM (lqmAz)

41 >>I hope she does a series of "You Just Might Be A Redneck" jokes.

"You just might be a criminal..."

...If you "find a batch of FBI files on your political foes in your private residence.

...you would rather risk a foreign hack attack than make your emails available for FOIA requests.

...if your favorite saying is "I do not recall"

Posted by: Lizzy at October 19, 2015 07:28 PM (NOIQH)

42 Laws-a-mercy, Miss Scarlet! I don't knows nuthin' 'bout ~~birthin' no babies~~ wipin' no servers!

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at October 19, 2015 07:28 PM (NeFrd)

43 Y'all come back real soon.
Posted by: Mister Ghost

Takey yer shoes off.

Posted by: Uncle Jed at October 19, 2015 07:28 PM (9Fc79)

44 Fly, monkeys, FLY!!!

Posted by: Hillary! at October 19, 2015 07:28 PM (YFFpo)

45 I bet you can squeal like a pig. Weeeeeeee!

Posted by: 2 toothes at October 19, 2015 07:28 PM (0O2Lr)

46 She ain't no ways tarred, yet.

Posted by: Grump928(C) owns stock in Feather and Rail Company Ltd. at October 19, 2015 07:29 PM (rwI+c)

47 I don't no nuttin' 'bout securing no email servers!

Posted by: Prissy Clinton at October 19, 2015 07:29 PM (JO9+V)

48 You know, I don't like this candidate as much as the last.

Too heavy a negro dialect.

Posted by: Harry Reid at October 19, 2015 07:29 PM (lqmAz)

49 34 How much money would it take to make this worthless hag go away?
Posted by: Northernlurker
---
I have plenty of money. I crave the power and the adoration.

I will pluck you like the defenseless chicken that you are. And bedraggled, cold, hungry, naked you will feebly nestle up against my canckle, begging me to have pity upon you! Hahahahahah!!!
Posted by: Hillary Clinton at October 19, 2015 07:25 PM (VJ3W

Thanks--no sleep for me tonight.

Posted by: Northernlurker at October 19, 2015 07:29 PM (tMrac)

50 If I have to lie, steal, cheat or kill. As God is my witness, I'll never be hungry again!

Posted by: Scarlet O'Hillary at October 19, 2015 07:30 PM (9Fc79)

51 Well, bless her hear---- uh, check that -- does she have a heart or just a heart-shaped cavern in her chest?

Posted by: Lizzy at October 19, 2015 07:30 PM (NOIQH)

52 I get no kick from champagne! Mere alcohol, doesn't thrill me at all ...

Posted by: Hillary! at October 19, 2015 07:30 PM (rwI+c)

53 If you claim to be flat broke while running a multi-billion dollar international foundation...

...you just might be a criminal.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at October 19, 2015 07:30 PM (NeFrd)

54 She's like a mobster: you never put your money or property in your own name.

So, she's still "broke".

Posted by: Chupacabra at October 19, 2015 07:30 PM (QFjNO)

55
She got religion kneeling on the astroturf in the back of an El Camino.

Posted by: Bent Bill at October 19, 2015 07:31 PM (q4hvt)

56 I don't ever want to have to hear that harridan speechifying in public again, until it comes after the words "do you have anything you wish to say in your defense before I pronounce your sentence?"

And dear God, let her keep it short.

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:31 PM (iIzG7)

57 >>>She's droppin' a lot of g's, soundin' like she's a-fixin' to some yelin' and scoldin'.

I was for DOMA before I were agin' it.

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at October 19, 2015 07:31 PM (VJ3W8)

58 She will be prezzie.

Posted by: Monsieur Mew Mew at October 19, 2015 07:31 PM (0LHZx)

59 Up against the wall Redneck Muther

Posted by: Jerry Jeff at October 19, 2015 07:32 PM (0O2Lr)

60 Thou shalt not covet

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin, Model Citizen at October 19, 2015 07:32 PM (Oy0zJ)

61 Nembutal numbs it all, but I prefer alcohol.

Posted by: The Clash at October 19, 2015 07:32 PM (tMrac)

62 She's really laying the "Obama, how great thou art" on thickly, isn't she? She actually thinks that will prevent Obama from putting a torpedo in her amidships. Protip Hillary, it won't. And no, I don't mean a pink torpedo. That goes without saying.

Posted by: pep at October 19, 2015 07:32 PM (LAe3v)

63 does she have a heart or just a heart-shaped cavern in her chest?

Posted by: Lizzy at October 19, 2015 07:30 PM (NOIQH)
------------Just the nearest approximation of a black hole to be found on the planet.

Posted by: Old Blue at October 19, 2015 07:32 PM (9iR5/)

64 Whichever contractor bid to construct Hillary's linguistics chip, my hat is off to you, sirs.

Posted by: Fritz at October 19, 2015 07:33 PM (3tjn4)

65 Hillary has the heart of a 10 year old girl, in a jar, in her carry-on..

Posted by: Grump928(C) beating memes to death since 2006 at October 19, 2015 07:33 PM (rwI+c)

66 >>------------Just the nearest approximation of a black hole to be found on the planet.

...that must be fed the souls of others. Often.

Posted by: Lizzy at October 19, 2015 07:34 PM (NOIQH)

67 Pat Woodell, one of the girls of Petticoat Junction passed away at 71.

That's why Uncle Joe was always waiting underneath the water tower to drink some of the water after they got through swimming.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 19, 2015 07:34 PM (LUgeY)

68 Well, bless her hear---- uh, check that -- does she have a heart or just a heart-shaped cavern in her chest?

Posted by: Lizzy at October 19, 2015 07:30 PM (NOIQH)

Put it this way, I wouldn't waste the time cutting a dry hole.

Posted by: Aztec Priest at October 19, 2015 07:34 PM (zc3Db)

69 "Just the nearest approximation of a black hole to be found on the planet."

That heart-shaped crater in her thorax is proof positive that Nature does NOT, in fact, abhor a vacuum.

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:34 PM (iIzG7)

70 I can't wait for her to bust out in an imitation of Karl Childers, the guy from Slingblade.

Or perhaps the ever-popular "I was born a poor black child".

Posted by: pep at October 19, 2015 07:35 PM (LAe3v)

71 She WAS born a poor, black sharecropper's daughter, wasn't she?

Or was she born a coal miner's daughter in Butcher's Hollow?

Posted by: stuiec at October 19, 2015 07:35 PM (eetvJ)

72 This can be fixed!

Moses supposes his toeses are roses...

Posted by: Man from Wazzustan at October 19, 2015 07:36 PM (uPxUo)

73 When language will she be speaking when she, at long last, summons Chtulthu, and I don't mean the AOSHQ commentator.

Posted by: Northernlurker at October 19, 2015 07:36 PM (tMrac)

74 I ain't no ways heartless. Planned Parenthood sent me a complimentary jar stuffed full of 'em! Haw haw haw!!!

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at October 19, 2015 07:37 PM (VJ3W8)

75 Well, I was born a gold miner's daughter.

Posted by: Scarlet O'Hillary at October 19, 2015 07:37 PM (9Fc79)

76 That heart-shaped crater in her thorax is proof positive that Nature does NOT, in fact, abhor a vacuum.

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:34 PM (iIzG7)
But Planned Parenthood will vacuum a ... wait, what?

Posted by: stuiec at October 19, 2015 07:37 PM (eetvJ)

77 I was born a poor black child. I remember the days, sittin' on the porch with my family, singin' and dancin' down in Mississippi...

Posted by: The Jerk. No really, THE Jerk at October 19, 2015 07:37 PM (0O2Lr)

78 This is nothing. Wait until Shrillary hits the city and pulls out her dope raps for the urban crowd.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 19, 2015 07:37 PM (zc3Db)

79 Posted by: Northernlurker at October 19, 2015 07:36 PM (tMrac)

________________________________

They have their own language only they know. Like twins.

Posted by: CozMark at October 19, 2015 07:38 PM (CbGSW)

80 Still waiting for the Yooper accent and the fish boil to appeal to Upper Midwest rubes.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 19, 2015 07:38 PM (jR7Wy)

81 a subtle fake southern accent.

That module passed certification and is authenticated before each use, so I'm not sure what you're referring to.

Posted by: Hillbot 5.1 at October 19, 2015 07:38 PM (Z58Xa)

82 Stupid is as stupid does.

Posted by: Hillary Gump at October 19, 2015 07:38 PM (0O2Lr)

83 70: I reckon I'll have some a dem french fried potaters.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 19, 2015 07:38 PM (ucDmr)

84 up 2 on the twang ... You are go for drawl.

Posted by: Hillary! Mission Control at October 19, 2015 07:39 PM (rwI+c)

85 Somebody feed her some biscuits.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 19, 2015 07:39 PM (LUgeY)

86 Still waiting for the Yooper accent and the fish boil to appeal to Upper Midwest rubes.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag

Not enough electoral college votes to bother with.

Posted by: Scarlet O'Hillary at October 19, 2015 07:39 PM (9Fc79)

87 So I'm wondering, does horseface Kerry ever give speeches in an Equine accent?

Posted by: Northernlurker at October 19, 2015 07:40 PM (tMrac)

88 how about a Kickstarter to pay Hillary to leave the country and never return? I bet it could crack a few billion$ easily

Posted by: x at October 19, 2015 07:40 PM (57fhp)

89 Well, Mrs. Clinton, I for one and I'm sure all fair minded, right thinking people appreciate your attempt to relate to all peoples of all backgrounds be they useless red necked cracker racists or oppressed ghetto dwelling homeboys kept down by 'The Man". That the Right Wing Hate Machine sees this as pandering instead of an attempt to relate to your audience does not surprise me in the least as they again try to use any situation that they can foist upon the American public in their continuing attempt to sabotage your history making attempt to become America's first woman president!

Posted by: Real Everyday American at October 19, 2015 07:40 PM (YFFpo)

90 I was born a poor black child. I remember the days, sittin' on the porch with my family, singin' and dancin' down in Mississippi...

Posted by: The Jerk. No really, THE Jerk at October 19, 2015 07:37 PM (0O2Lr)

Well ... Shrillary certainly has no "special purpose".

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 19, 2015 07:40 PM (zc3Db)

91 I'm waiting to hear her Mexican.

Posted by: Jeb at October 19, 2015 07:40 PM (0O2Lr)

92 So I'm wondering, does horseface Kerry ever give speeches in an Equine accent?

****

Only whinnie feels like it.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at October 19, 2015 07:40 PM (NeFrd)

93 So I'm wondering, does horseface Kerry ever give speeches in an Equine accent?

Naaaay!

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 19, 2015 07:41 PM (LUgeY)

94 Is this where I get me a huntin' license?

Posted by: Scarlet O'Hillary at October 19, 2015 07:41 PM (9Fc79)

95 Bless her heart.

Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 19, 2015 07:41 PM (ucDmr)

96
Hillary's accent is as fake as her dick.

Posted by: Reset da Button at October 19, 2015 07:41 PM (q4hvt)

97 88
how about a Kickstarter to pay Hillary to leave the ~~country~~ planet and never return? I bet it could crack a few billion$ easily

Posted by: x

FIFY

Posted by: pep at October 19, 2015 07:41 PM (LAe3v)

98 89 Well, Mrs. Clinton, I for one and I'm sure all fair minded, right thinking people appreciate your attempt to relate to all peoples of all backgrounds be they useless red necked cracker racists or oppressed ghetto dwelling homeboys kept down by 'The Man". That the Right Wing Hate Machine sees this as pandering instead of an attempt to relate to your audience does not surprise me in the least as they again try to use any situation that they can foist upon the American public in their continuing attempt to sabotage your history making attempt to become America's first woman president!
Posted by: Real Everyday American at October 19, 2015 07:40 PM (YFFpo)

__________________________________

homo

Posted by: CozMark at October 19, 2015 07:41 PM (CbGSW)

99 There was a Torchwood mini-series where there were aliens that visited earth every 30 (?) and demanded humanity pay a tribute to hold off invasion, in the form of 70 kids. Later you discover that they don't exactly consume them --- well, not in a single meal. The kids are enslaved sort of like in the Matrix except they are attached to a giant alien who feeds off their life force for the next 30 years. Really, really twisted.

So...this is what I imagine Hillary doing; living off the lives of babies she so happily ensures are served up to the Satanists at PP. The babies can be a stand-in for the government/croney influence selling teat.

Posted by: Lizzy at October 19, 2015 07:41 PM (NOIQH)

100 >>>So I'm wondering, does horseface Kerry ever give speeches in an Equine accent?

Posted by: Northernlurker at October 19, 2015 07:40 PM (tMrac)<<<

Neigh.

Posted by: Secretartiat of State Lurch at October 19, 2015 07:42 PM (lqmAz)

101 I be doin tha gangsta lingo, yo, when I be chillin in tha inna cities. I be rockin tha bling.

I be quite conversint wid tha thug life persona, yo!

I cap Snoop Diddy in the ass he try to cop a feel! I Huma-dog's shorty. She my bitch, yo.

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at October 19, 2015 07:42 PM (VJ3W8)

102 "I'm waiting to hear her Mexican."

"Maria, put down the laundry and come to the living room; there's someone here who wants to hear you talk..."

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:42 PM (iIzG7)

103 I know a little German.

Posted by: Scarlet O'Hillary at October 19, 2015 07:42 PM (9Fc79)

104 up 2 on the twang ... You are go for drawl.
Posted by: Hillary! Mission Control

Chuckle!

Posted by: dogfish at October 19, 2015 07:42 PM (0O2Lr)

105 97 88
how about a Kickstarter to pay Hillary to leave the country planet and never return? I bet it could crack a few billion$ easily

Posted by: x

FIFY
Posted by: pep

I was trying to keep their servers from being overloaded with contributions

Posted by: x at October 19, 2015 07:42 PM (57fhp)

106 Every time I look at Kerry, I can't help thinking "Please don't beat me Wilbur!"

Posted by: Old Blue at October 19, 2015 07:42 PM (9iR5/)

107 Grannybot's green couch blouse looks like something out of a 1970s fraternity common area.

Posted by: Fritz at October 19, 2015 07:43 PM (3tjn4)

108 91
I'm waiting to hear her Mexican.

Posted by: Jeb

Ay ay yiyay
I am the Frito Bandito!
I love Fritos corn cheeps
I love them I do
I love Fritos corn chips
I'll get them from you.......

Posted by: Hillary at October 19, 2015 07:43 PM (LAe3v)

109 "Mrs. Clinton, our research shows that the voters crave more authenticity from their candidates."

"More authenticity, eh? Well, then, why don't I break out my authentic Southern drawl, perfected over decades in the Governor's mansion in Little Rock?"

"Um...."

Posted by: stuiec at October 19, 2015 07:44 PM (eetvJ)

110 Grannybot's green couch blouse looks like something out of a 1970s fraternity common area.

Posted by: Fritz at October 19, 2015 07:43 PM (3tjn4)

And it has the vomit stains, too.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 19, 2015 07:44 PM (zc3Db)

111 108 91
I'm waiting to hear her Mexican.

Posted by: Jeb

Ay ay yiyay
I am the Frito Bandito!
I love Fritos corn cheeps
I love them I do
I love Fritos corn chips
I'll get them from you.......
Posted by: Hillary at October 19, 2015 07:43 PM (LAe3v)

Now I'm picturing her do a Charo style bootie shake. Thanks for another sleepless night.

Posted by: Northernlurker at October 19, 2015 07:44 PM (tMrac)

112 @106 when I see Kerry I think he should run into a hockey stick again and again and again.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin, Model Citizen at October 19, 2015 07:45 PM (7uC+4)

113 "... the voters crave more authenticity..."

Authenticity is critical. Once you learn to fake that, everything else falls into place by itself.

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:45 PM (iIzG7)

114 Every time I look at Kerry, I can't help thinking "Please don't beat me Wilbur!"

Posted by: Old Blue at October 19, 2015 07:42 PM (9iR5/)

Just before he walks up to the podium, they give him a big spoonful of peanut butter.

Posted by: stuiec at October 19, 2015 07:45 PM (eetvJ)

115 "... the voters crave more authenticity..."

You misspelt "free shit."

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:46 PM (iIzG7)

116
New York girl who was born in Illinois
.........................

You mean built in Illinois, right?

Posted by: wth at October 19, 2015 07:46 PM (wAQA5)

117 Don't know but this post reminded me of another of Obama's genius statements. During the primary he was downplaying the race in Kentucky and said Hillary has a better chance since Arkansas was closer to Kentucky than Illinois. I guess he forgot Illinois borders part of Kentucky whereas Arkansas does not.

Posted by: Max Rockatansky at October 19, 2015 07:46 PM (oOYbM)

118 It's a fake lesbo Arkansas accent. The pubs in your teeth give it that edge.

Posted by: Good ole Bill Clinton, feminst hero and rapist. at October 19, 2015 07:46 PM (jJRIy)

119 Just goes to show how dumb she thinks my cousins back home in Alabama are.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 19, 2015 07:46 PM (LUgeY)

120 how about a Kickstarter to pay Hillary to leave the country and never return?

If we just gave each newly-elected Democrat one billion dollars from the Treasury to fuck off, we could save a ton of money.

Posted by: t-bird at October 19, 2015 07:46 PM (Z58Xa)

121 Sincerity - if you can fake that, you've got it made

Posted by: Scarlet O'Hillary at October 19, 2015 07:47 PM (9Fc79)

122 Dese meshuggahs make me so verklempt!

Posted by: Hilly in Hymietown at October 19, 2015 07:48 PM (oVJmc)

123 @117 Obama minored in geography

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin, Model Citizen at October 19, 2015 07:48 PM (MwNIp)

124 I know a little German.

Who you calling little?

Posted by: Angela Merkel at October 19, 2015 07:48 PM (Z58Xa)

125 Now I'm picturing her do a Charo style bootie shake. Thanks for another sleepless night.
Posted by: Northernlurker

Thanks for sharing your nightmare to the rest of us. *rocking in the corner*

Posted by: dogfish at October 19, 2015 07:48 PM (0O2Lr)

126 The one thing about Kerry that sticks in my mind is that video of him, inexplicably, attempting to windsurf.

It was just so forced. "Sure I'm in the middle of a presidential race. But, I think I'll go windsurfing today."

It's like Dukakis riding in the tank, looked like a mosquitoe.

Hillary! and her many accents she uses to relate to the humans.

Posted by: CozMark at October 19, 2015 07:48 PM (CbGSW)

127 We're not the only ones up sh*t creek. "Austrian town of 1,600 Drowns in Migrant Feces and Garbage":

http://tinyurl.com/pcxw48o

Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 19, 2015 07:49 PM (jR7Wy)

128 "How about a Kickstarter to pay Hillary to leave the country and never return?"

I read that as drop-kicking her out of the country.

Well, I can dream, can't I?

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:49 PM (iIzG7)

129 Now I'm picturing her do a Charo style bootie shake. Thanks for another sleepless night.

Coochie coochie.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 19, 2015 07:49 PM (LUgeY)

130 She has a 'Dick Van Dyke in Mary Poppins' quality.

Mostly on the 'Dyke.'

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at October 19, 2015 07:50 PM (oVJmc)

131 Can I join in with you ladies in singin' some songs? I just love how you people sing and dance with such joy!

Posted by: Hillary! to the Camptown Ladies Antioch Church Choir at October 19, 2015 07:51 PM (JO9+V)

132
We get corns and bunions too, jes like ya'all.

Posted by: Hillary!s feet at October 19, 2015 07:51 PM (wAQA5)

133 One things Southerners really like is for senators from New York to tell them gun confiscation is a cool thing.

Posted by: stace at October 19, 2015 07:52 PM (CoX6k)

134 Q: Madame Secretary, what was your biggest accomplishment while holding the office of Secretary of State?

A: Dindu nuffin.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at October 19, 2015 07:53 PM (8ZskC)

135 Love the dyed burlap sack she is wearing.

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at October 19, 2015 07:53 PM (9jeGC)

136 We're not the only ones up sh*t creek. "Austrian town of 1,600 Drowns in Migrant Feces and Garbage"

Somebody's doing the pooping!

Posted by: Trumpy at October 19, 2015 07:53 PM (9Fc79)

137 We get corns and bunions too, jes like ya'all.

Posted by: Hillary!s feet

*****

Not to mention the grits.

Posted by: Hillary's nether regions at October 19, 2015 07:53 PM (NeFrd)

138 90 and 120

Posted by: Hillary's nether regions at October 19, 2015 07:54 PM (NeFrd)

139 If she turns up in a pantsuit made from green curtains she's carried this bullshit way too far.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at October 19, 2015 07:54 PM (8ZskC)

140 Just before he walks up to the podium, they give him a big spoonful of peanut butter.
Posted by: stuiec
---
If Hillary can joke about being a robot, Kerry should arrange to do an interview in which he eats sugar cubes directly off the the palm of the interviewer's hand and nuzzles him afterwards.

It would show he has a sense of humor about himself.

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at October 19, 2015 07:55 PM (VJ3W8)

141 Man, you should hear her speak Ebonics. At home it gets Huma wet.

Posted by: Good ole Bill Clinton, feminst hero and rapist. at October 19, 2015 07:55 PM (jJRIy)

142 Where kin ahh git me wunna them huntin' licenses?

Posted by: Sir Hillary Edmund Rodham Butler Clinton at October 19, 2015 07:55 PM (8ZskC)

143 "If she turns up in a pantsuit made from green curtains she's carried this bullshit way too far."

Cicero, that's the funniest thing I've read all day. I bow your superior wit.

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:55 PM (iIzG7)

144 Once again she proves what a cunning linguist she is.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at October 19, 2015 07:57 PM (oVJmc)

145 112
@106 when I see Kerry I think he should run into a hockey stick again and again and again.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarin, Model Citizen at October 19, 2015 07:45 PM

~~~

His plastic surgeon used a hockey stick instead of a scalpel.

Posted by: IrishEi at October 19, 2015 07:57 PM (E6RIJ)

146 If she turns up in a pantsuit made from green curtains she's carried this bullshit way too far.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero)

I Saw It In The Window, And I Just Couldn't Resist It

Posted by: Scarlet O'Hillary at October 19, 2015 07:58 PM (9Fc79)

147 What's the difference between a Yankee and a damn Yankee?

Posted by: dogfish at October 19, 2015 07:58 PM (0O2Lr)

148 Scarlet O'Harridan

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at October 19, 2015 07:58 PM (oVJmc)

149 Now I want to attend one of her rallies somewhere and hear her uncork that phony accent, just so I could shout "frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn."

Posted by: Qoheleth at October 19, 2015 07:58 PM (iIzG7)

150 "Frankly my dear, what does it matter?

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at October 19, 2015 07:59 PM (NeFrd)

151 "What's the difference between a Yankee and a damn Yankee?"

Us Yankees are poor white folk who live out in the sticks making a living off the land.

damn yankees are from the cities like Bah-stahn and Naw York.

Posted by: Tim in Illinois. Old and unimproved. at October 19, 2015 08:01 PM (kLrYQ)

152 "What's the difference between a Yankee and a damn Yankee?"

A pregnant daughter.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at October 19, 2015 08:02 PM (oVJmc)

153 The kids are enslaved sort of like in the Matrix except they are
attached to a giant alien who feeds off their life force for the next 30
years.

The kids were a painkiller. More Capaldi.

Posted by: DaveA at October 19, 2015 08:02 PM (DL2i+)

154 147
What's the difference between a Yankee and a damn Yankee?

Posted by: dogfish at October 19, 2015 07:58 PM (0O2Lr)
---------About that >< much

Posted by: Old Blue at October 19, 2015 08:02 PM (9iR5/)

155 Cicero, that's the funniest thing I've read all day. I bow your superior wit.

*curtsies*

*giggles girlishly*

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at October 19, 2015 08:03 PM (8ZskC)

156 152
"What's the difference between a Yankee and a damn Yankee?"

Like hemorrhoids, a good Yankee goes back up, a bad one stays down

Posted by: Nip Sip at October 19, 2015 08:05 PM (jJRIy)

157 153 The kids are enslaved sort of like in the Matrix except they are
attached to a giant alien who feeds off their life force for the next 30
years.

The kids were a painkiller. More Capaldi.
Posted by: DaveA at October 19, 2015 08:02 PM (DL2i+)

_______________________________

Don't mean to quibble but the kids were actually a recreational drug. The kids hormones got them high.

Posted by: CozMark at October 19, 2015 08:05 PM (CbGSW)

158 Well, here's a comparison. My sister has been out of the country since 1972-married to an Englishman and living in England since the 1980's. When I talk to her on the phone she has picked up a kind of an English accent , but when she visits me for a while she starts to sound a little more like she's from NJ (and no, we don't all sound like we could be on the cast on "Jersey Shore". ;^). She's not faking anything. She just lapses into the accent she had naturally for 18 years. Hillary was raised in IL and went to a Northern college. It's possible that having been married to Bill Clinton for such a long time she could have picked up part of his Arkansas accent. However, she was also a Senator from NY and spent years in DC. so as the article indicates she's probably putting an accent on for the people in Alabama-who don't sound like they're from Arkansas either. I wonder what she sounds like when she goes to Chicago It's too bad she has to patronize them in that way in order to make it seems like she's one of them..

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at October 19, 2015 08:05 PM (GERXL)

159 damn yankees are from the cities like Bah-stahn and Naw York.
Posted by: Tim in Illinois
---
You misspelled Noo Yawk. I left dere and retoined to lawn guylind when DeBlasio gots elected.

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at October 19, 2015 08:06 PM (VJ3W8)

160 One of the Bloom County gems...

http://tinyurl.com/ohhzamt

Posted by: dogfish at October 19, 2015 08:06 PM (0O2Lr)

161 Posted by: dogfish at October 19, 2015 08:06 PM (0O2Lr)
--------
Awesome!

Posted by: Old Blue at October 19, 2015 08:09 PM (9iR5/)

162 Don't mean to quibble but the kids were actually a recreational drug.

Ooops, you're right.

Would you rather listen to HRC or evil aliens slinging green shit at the wall?

Posted by: DaveA at October 19, 2015 08:12 PM (DL2i+)

163 if she goes to new England does she speak Mainah?

Posted by: Bigby's Knuckle Sandwich at October 19, 2015 08:14 PM (Cq0oW)

164 Webb considering Independent Run

http://tinyurl.com/o2nzhrq

(Yahoo)

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at October 19, 2015 08:14 PM (oVJmc)

165 Or, just go see the nood.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at October 19, 2015 08:15 PM (oVJmc)

166 @158

This is true. I lived in NJ in HS and had a Jersey accent, when I returned South, I regained my native accent, When I go to NYC and start getting the BS you are a hick because of your accent, my Jersey accent will resurface to blister the asshole.

It sort of shocks them that I can talk redneck Jersey.

Posted by: Nip Sip at October 19, 2015 08:15 PM (jJRIy)

167 Would you rather listen to HRC or evil aliens slinging green shit at the wall?
----------
Ack! Ack ack ack ack! Ackack ack ack!
*Fires ray gun at the Hilldog.*

Posted by: Old Blue at October 19, 2015 08:16 PM (9iR5/)

168 It's possible that having been married to Bill Clinton for such a long time she could have picked up part of his Arkansas accent. However, she was also a Senator from NY and spent years in DC. so as the article indicates she's probably putting an accent on for the people in Alabama-who don't sound like they're from Arkansas either. I wonder what she sounds like when she goes to Chicago It's too bad she has to patronize them in that way in order to make it seems like she's one of them..Posted by: FenelonSpoke
---
That seems a bit unrealistically optimistic. We have the counterexample of acyors who fake accents intentionally. Is it even probable this sociopath (who I'd wager is nothing like your sister) would do anything accidentally when the power she craves is on the line.

And it's not too bad she has to patronize them. It's great that her positions are so obviously fake and harmful that she has to resort to this silly trickery. Makes it more likely people will see through her in time.

I've stopped thinking of Dems as merely my neighbor. They are dangerous assailants.

Posted by: Bruce Boehner at October 19, 2015 08:21 PM (VJ3W8)

169 Hillary ain't no ways a tard...

Posted by: Richard McEnroe at October 19, 2015 10:35 PM (Kucy5)

170 The Light Worker in Chief is also a serial "g" dropper, and often slips into his "jus folks" locutions but gets a pass because he's (1/2) black, because, you (fellow Democrats) know, they all talk like that.

Posted by: Ex NYC Peasant at October 20, 2015 09:06 AM (k8tEg)

171 I get no kicks from champagne....

Posted by: Best Movie on Race Evah at October 20, 2015 09:08 AM (k8tEg)

172 I want to see her in blackface. Come on, Hill, the NAACP would love it.

Posted by: Abby Normal at October 20, 2015 08:27 PM (WfnlB)

Processing 0.02, elapsed 0.0282 seconds.
15 queries taking 0.0114 seconds, 181 records returned.
Page size 84 kb.
Powered by Minx 0.8 beta.