aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com
CBD:
cbd.aoshq at gee mail.com
Buck:
buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com
joe mannix:
mannix2024 at proton.me
MisHum:
petmorons at gee mail.com
J.J. Sefton:
sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com
Panic Strikes School When Child Overheard Asking for "Gun;" Red Alert Cancelled When It Is Determined He Asked for "Gum"
What a stupid time to be alive.
Comments
(Jump to bottom of comments)Posted by: Delurk Ergo Sum at October 15, 2015 06:31 PM (zetif)
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at October 15, 2015 06:31 PM (g0dZ5)
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at October 15, 2015 06:31 PM (g0dZ5)
Posted by: Anna Puma at October 15, 2015 06:31 PM (kVLm4)
Posted by: JackStraw at October 15, 2015 06:32 PM (/tuJf)
Posted by: Furious George at October 15, 2015 06:33 PM (UlJ3l)
Posted by: JackStraw at October 15, 2015 06:32 PM
Golf clap.
Posted by: RedMindBlueState at October 15, 2015 06:34 PM (KrAjA)
Oh Ace, you are so cynical. That's the kind of panic that saves imaginary lives from imaginary shootings.
You know, just like how making all kinds of New Rules on campus saves women from imaginary rapes.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 06:35 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: rickl at October 15, 2015 06:35 PM (sdi6R)
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 06:35 PM (LUgeY)
Posted by: An Inanimate Carbon Rod at October 15, 2015 06:35 PM (FohCt)
Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at October 15, 2015 06:35 PM (oVJmc)
Posted by: rickl at October 15, 2015 06:36 PM (sdi6R)
Posted by: donna at October 15, 2015 06:36 PM (/dSsq)
Posted by: Bigby's Knuckle Sandwich at October 15, 2015 06:36 PM (Cq0oW)
Posted by: Qoheleth at October 15, 2015 06:36 PM (iIzG7)
Posted by: JackStraw at October 15, 2015 06:36 PM (/tuJf)
Posted by: SMFH at it all at October 15, 2015 06:37 PM (zyIlW)
Posted by: chemjeff at October 15, 2015 06:37 PM (Aq/wC)
Posted by: Val Kilmer's Pendulous Moobs at October 15, 2015 06:37 PM (qjyQp)
Posted by: redenzo at October 15, 2015 06:37 PM (WCnJW)
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 06:37 PM (NOIQH)
We live in Make-Believe Times.
We make-believe that all these Progressive bullshit Rules actually accomplish what they purport to accomplish.
Just like how everyone is making believe that obamacare accomplished what it was supposed to instead of the exact opposite.
#allimaginarylivesmatter
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 06:38 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: se pa moron at October 15, 2015 06:38 PM (sI4OA)
Posted by: AE at October 15, 2015 06:38 PM (+ft6G)
Posted by: RedMindBlueState at October 15, 2015 06:38 PM (KrAjA)
Posted by: Mindless Idiots Everywhere at October 15, 2015 06:39 PM (SukjU)
Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 15, 2015 06:39 PM (ucDmr)
Posted by: Harry Reid at October 15, 2015 06:39 PM (o8n43)
Every time something this stupid makes the "news," Donald Trump's poll number go up.
People are so sick of this shit.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 06:39 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at October 15, 2015 06:39 PM (4ErVI)
I'd bet the # of male employees at that school is
Public schools are very feminine now.
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 06:39 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Modern Man at October 15, 2015 06:40 PM (1DH1V)
Posted by: Bigby's Knuckle Sandwich at October 15, 2015 06:40 PM (Cq0oW)
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at October 15, 2015 06:40 PM (g0dZ5)
All habits, good and bad, require #TwoWeeks to make or break. Keep on keeping on.
Posted by: se pa moron at October 15, 2015 06:40 PM (sI4OA)
Posted by: Chuck Yeager at October 15, 2015 06:40 PM (o8n43)
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 06:41 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: rebel flounder at October 15, 2015 06:41 PM (1DH1V)
The panic wasn't over fear of a gun.
The panic [or, rather, the faux-panic] was over the fact the child said a forbidden word.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 06:41 PM (Fv3UZ)
And let's not leave out the girls. After all, they're more special than boys, now.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 06:41 PM (FsuaD)
Posted by: Pug Mahon at October 15, 2015 06:42 PM (RwwCT)
-- Rick Delanty.
pg 636. Lucifer's Hammer. Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle.
Posted by: Anna Puma at October 15, 2015 06:42 PM (kVLm4)
Posted by: Fritz at October 15, 2015 06:42 PM (3tjn4)
Posted by: Colorado Alex at October 15, 2015 06:43 PM (fC9RO)
Posted by: huerfano at October 15, 2015 06:43 PM (O2jYw)
Also, fun story.
A few days ago I was checking the mail and saw the kid across the street (maybe 11 or 12?) loading a Scary Black Assault Rifle (or, as normal people know it, a hunting rifle) into the back of his family's car. I did not run inside to call the UN or the FBI. As I walked back, his dad was loading everyone else in the car, including a 3 year old girl wearing adorable camo.
Yes. It was a family going hunting. THE HORROR. THE HORROR.
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 06:43 PM (LzzEz)
Posted by: donna at October 15, 2015 06:43 PM (/dSsq)
17 Oh and ace, day 5 without cigarettes. The book was good but I still wouldn't mind choking a bitch.Posted by: JackStraw at October 15, 2015 06:36 PM (/tuJf)
All habits, good and bad, require #TwoWeeks to make or break. Keep on keeping on.
Posted by: se pa moron at October 15, 2015 06:40 PM (sI4OA)
Congrats! I am 2+ months in and the choke a bitch inclinations passed for me after about a week. Next week you get to look forward to the out of body feelings that nothing is right with you or the world (at least that is roughly how I remember it, cold-turkey-wise).
Posted by: rebel flounder at October 15, 2015 06:43 PM (1DH1V)
Posted by: himself at October 15, 2015 06:43 PM (8CdUx)
and people wonder why we're gonna have a reality show president. since 2003 the media has been making everything as dumb as possible. it's worked.
Posted by: x at October 15, 2015 06:43 PM (57fhp)
Posted by: Bigby's Knuckle Sandwich at October 15, 2015 06:43 PM (Cq0oW)
Posted by: acethepug at October 15, 2015 06:44 PM (RHPFv)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 06:44 PM (8HTq1)
Posted by: maddogg at October 15, 2015 06:44 PM (xWW96)
You jest, but all the schoold I went to super anti-gum nazis.
Holy cats, if you were caught chewing gum, you got a demerit!!
Honest to Christ, my junior high school equated chewing gum with vandalism, it was that serious of an offense.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: Blanco Basura at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (4WhSY)
Posted by: SMFH at it all at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (zyIlW)
Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (oVJmc)
http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2015/10/11/ oregon-8th-grader-suspended-from-school-for- wearing-patriotic-shirt-showing-gun/
Posted by: rebel flounder at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (1DH1V)
They are training the kids to fear and hate guns.
They've banned drawings of guns.
They've suspended a student for bringing in a water gun.
They've suspended a student for bringing in a Lego figure holding a teeny-tiny gun.
They've suspended a student for chewing a pop-tart into the shape of a gun.
They've suspended a student for pointing and shooting a finger gun during recess.
Now they created a lock-down panic at the (imaginary) mention of a gun.
This is intentional, this is brainwashing kids.
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: donna at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (/dSsq)
Posted by: rickl
---------------------
That backfired on me back in the seventies. Had enough for the entire class one day, but all I got was a trip to the principal's office.
Heh. It was worth it.
Posted by: Chi at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (ifloA)
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (LzzEz)
2003 the media has been making everything as dumb as possible. it's
worked..."
I'm not worried. After all, imagine how powerful we'll be, when the whole country has to turn to us to tell them why not to water the vegetables with Brawndo.
Posted by: Qoheleth at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (iIzG7)
Oh, no, they gum that up, too. Fortunately they have inmates they can force to clean it.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at October 15, 2015 06:46 PM (2lndx)
And you know what was the kicker?
I was in elementary school at the advent of Hubba Bubba and Bubblicious gum.
I mean, these new gums were AWESOME. So the temptation was tremendous.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 06:46 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: it will pass at October 15, 2015 06:46 PM (PGh+Q)
Oh and ace, day 5 without cigarettes. The book was good but I still wouldn't mind choking a bitch.
Posted by: JackStraw at October 15, 2015 06:36 PM (/tuJf)
I made it 20 days my first try until I succumbed to the lure during a rage fit. My second try begins on the 19th (next Tuesday). Good luck to you! It's supposed to get easier!
Posted by: kathysaysso at October 15, 2015 06:46 PM (fMQoG)
Posted by: Nevergiveup at October 15, 2015 06:46 PM (DUoqb)
Posted by: chavez the hugo at October 15, 2015 06:46 PM (ucDmr)
Posted by: se pa moron at October 15, 2015 06:38 PM (sI4OA)
It is not Zero Tolerance, It is Zero Intelligence. Most of these Education Professionals are to put it mildly, SHTUUUPID!!
Notce how they advance in their positions. It is by putting in time, and taking more college classes to get advanced degrees. Have you ever taken a University Education Department Class? Regurgitate the proper pablum and you get an "A"
They and their union will fight Tooth and Nail to never, ever take an Aptitude Test or a test on the subjects they teach. Because the few times those tests were required, a huge proportion of these credentialed cretins failed.
Posted by: Mindless Idiots Everywhere at October 15, 2015 06:46 PM (SukjU)
Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 15, 2015 06:46 PM (vl/xn)
Posted by: t-bird at October 15, 2015 06:47 PM (eeTCA)
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 06:47 PM (NOIQH)
Tried to explain Marine boot camp vs. what her Pajama Boy was "enduring" and she just didn't get it.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 06:48 PM (FsuaD)
Little Timmy's Schoolteacher: OMG, Timmy's asking for a Submarine-launched Ballistic Missile!
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 06:48 PM (VAsIq)
Posted by: Skip at October 15, 2015 06:48 PM (Ken0l)
Posted by: Weasel at October 15, 2015 06:48 PM (e3bId)
Posted by: Delurk Ergo Sum at October 15, 2015 06:48 PM (zetif)
They are training the kids to fear and hate guns.
They've banned drawings of guns.
They've suspended a student for bringing in a water gun.
They've suspended a student for bringing in a Lego figure holding a teeny-tiny gun.
They've suspended a student for chewing a pop-tart into the shape of a gun.
They've suspended a student for pointing and shooting a finger gun during recess.
Now they created a lock-down panic at the (imaginary) mention of a gun.
This is intentional, this is brainwashing kids.
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (NOIQH)
But if Fred wants to pee in the girls bathroom, no problem
Posted by: The Jackhole at October 15, 2015 06:48 PM (3mTyP)
Posted by: tu3031 at October 15, 2015 06:48 PM (YFFpo)
Posted by: donna at October 15, 2015 06:48 PM (/dSsq)
Soon they'll be sporting red neckerchiefs and turning their parents in to the authorities.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 15, 2015 06:49 PM (jR7Wy)
Posted by: Virgil Starkwell at October 15, 2015 06:49 PM (KUa85)
Posted by: t-bird at October 15, 2015 06:49 PM (eeTCA)
Posted by: maddogg at October 15, 2015 06:49 PM (xWW96)
Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at October 15, 2015 06:49 PM (oVJmc)
A lot of sane places have insane schools. They soak up the insanity at college, and some of them have such an excess they need to exude it back at the students.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at October 15, 2015 06:49 PM (2lndx)
Hays is just south of Austin. It's actually a sane area, in general.
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM
Yes, my brother lives just outside Wimberley and loves it. Except for all the Houston transplants.
Posted by: huerfano at October 15, 2015 06:49 PM (O2jYw)
(J/K)
Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at October 15, 2015 06:50 PM (vl/xn)
You can add t-shirts with pictures of guns to your list. Even ones depicting the Battlefield Cross.
Despicable, it is.
Posted by: Chi at October 15, 2015 06:50 PM (ifloA)
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at October 15, 2015 06:50 PM (9Fc79)
Well that should work out just peachy. Headed to Oz in the morning so nothing will be right with me or the world. But at least I will be locked in a can breathing other people's farts with not even a chance of smoking for 20 hours so I got that going for me.
Posted by: JackStraw at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (/tuJf)
Posted by: maddogg at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (xWW96)
Posted by: Black Lives Matter at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (jJRIy)
Posted by: Soothsayerwing Plover at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (Fv3UZ)
Been to a pediatrician's office lately?
Anti-gun posters and some of them apparently ask junior if there are guns at home during the check-up.
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (NOIQH)
Jack Ridley: Yeah, I think I got me a stick.
Chuck Yeager: Loan me some, will ya? I'll pay ya back later.
Jack Ridley: Fair enough.
Posted by: Edward Snowden at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (e8kgV)
They've suspended a student for bringing in a water gun.
They've suspended a student for bringing in a Lego figure holding a teeny-tiny gun.
They've suspended a student for chewing a pop-tart into the shape of a gun.
They've suspended a student for pointing and shooting a finger gun during recess.
Now they created a lock-down panic at the (imaginary) mention of a gun.
"
But take the guts of a clock and have your kid - your kid named Ahmed, no less - stuff it into a box to look like a bomb, and tote it to school, and you get an invite to 1600 Pennsylvania...
Posted by: Qoheleth at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (iIzG7)
Posted by: x at October 15, 2015 06:43 PM
I'd rather have a reality show President than the Second Coming of Evita Peron.
Posted by: Mindless Idiots Everywhere at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (SukjU)
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (jJRIy)
He'd be expelled in a day.
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (LzzEz)
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 06:52 PM (NOIQH)
remember MORT from Bazooka Joe who wears his shirt all the way up to his eyes?
Posted by: Soothsayerwing Plover at October 15, 2015 06:52 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: maddogg at October 15, 2015 06:53 PM (xWW96)
Posted by: Lizzy
----------------------
Yep. They were in their own front yard waiting for the bus. I forgot about that one.
Posted by: Chi at October 15, 2015 06:53 PM (ifloA)
This is intentional, this is brainwashing kids.
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 06:45 PM (NOIQH)
No question about it.
As Ayn Rand said, "Don't bother to examine a folly. Ask yourself only what it accomplishes."
Posted by: rickl at October 15, 2015 06:53 PM (sdi6R)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 06:48 PM (FsuaD)
---
Any time I hear parents whining about their whiny whiner bratlings I always "jokingly" suggest that they ship 'em off to Parris Island.
But I'm really thinking "Devil's Island".
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 15, 2015 06:53 PM (jR7Wy)
OK... since in the last few days they decided that a Penis is Equal to a gun...
this is Penis...
This is my GUM...
One is for chewing...
One is for FUN!
Posted by: BB Wolf at October 15, 2015 06:53 PM (qh617)
in the morning so nothing will be right with me or the world. But at
least I will be locked in a can breathing other people's farts with not
even a chance of smoking for 20 hours so I got that going for me.
Posted by: JackStraw at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (/tuJf)
You were smart to quit this far ahead of the election. If everything goes to chit next November you'll be less likely to start back up with over a year without them under your belt.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at October 15, 2015 06:53 PM (4ErVI)
Army basic 2001 was a shock to the system.
Army basic now is beyond a joke...especially with the changes they just made according to the Army Times.
Posted by: SMFH at it all at October 15, 2015 06:53 PM (zyIlW)
Posted by: bergerbilder at October 15, 2015 06:53 PM (djBqY)
Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at October 15, 2015 06:54 PM (oVJmc)
If we don't turn this ship around, we don't deserve to exist.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 06:55 PM (FsuaD)
LOL - they would FREAK.
My son was obsessed with drawing crime scenes (with police tape, ambulances, etc.) and CSI. Fortunately his private school was fine with it. In fact, at the class poetry reading his CSI poem didn't stick out much next to the other poems (by boys) about war video games, archery, etc.
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 06:55 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Barb the Evil Genius at October 15, 2015 06:55 PM (0MJkC)
Anti-gun posters and some of them apparently ask junior if there are guns at home during the check-up."
I was actually pleasantly surprised at the kids' check up today. The new doctor simply said "and if you have any guns at the home, make sure they are securely stored in a locked safe" while going down the list of things they have to say, and that was that.
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 06:55 PM (GZ6Pf)
Posted by: Fritz at October 15, 2015 06:56 PM (3tjn4)
Posted by: Bigby's Knuckle Sandwich at October 15, 2015 06:56 PM (Cq0oW)
Posted by: Northernlurker at October 15, 2015 06:56 PM (tMrac)
Posted by: GnuBreed at October 15, 2015 06:56 PM (gyKtp)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 06:56 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: Soothsayerwing Plover
Mort was from Occupy BubbleGum.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at October 15, 2015 06:56 PM (9Fc79)
remember the gum that SQIRTED IN YOUR MOUTH?
I forgot the name.
Posted by: Soothsayerwing Plover at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (Fv3UZ)
---
Freshen your breathe with Freshen Up
The gum that goes **squirt**
Can't remember the table of elements but that jingle is lodged firmly.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 15, 2015 06:56 PM (jR7Wy)
None of them lasted very long. They hate what schools are. They hate that they are required to do stupid, retarded crap that they know is, at best, ineffectual. They hate the bureaucracy that stymies creativity and learning.
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 06:56 PM (VAsIq)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 06:57 PM (Fv3UZ)
Good luck to you too. It actually isn't as bad as I thought and I have a lot of motivation but I don't care what the book or anyone else says, that first cup of coffee in the morning or that first beer .. yea, I want one.
Posted by: JackStraw at October 15, 2015 06:57 PM (/tuJf)
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at October 15, 2015 06:58 PM (8ZskC)
I thought Caitlyn was too old to join the Marines.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at October 15, 2015 06:58 PM (2lndx)
remember the gum that SQIRTED IN YOUR MOUTH?
I forgot the name.
Posted by: Soothsayerwing Plover at October 15, 2015 06:51 PM (Fv3UZ)
You misspelled gum.
Posted by: rebel flounder at October 15, 2015 06:58 PM (1DH1V)
Posted by: tcn in AK at October 15, 2015 06:58 PM (+YMhA)
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 06:59 PM (GZ6Pf)
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at October 15, 2015 06:59 PM (8ZskC)
Posted by: GnuBreed at October 15, 2015 06:59 PM (gyKtp)
Posted by: sherlock holmes at October 15, 2015 06:59 PM (m1pMI)
We had to call the Red Cross, and the chaplain told our son. My husband was allowed to speak to our broken-hearted son (he was the only grandchild of my parents) for about five minutes. And couldn't attend the funeral unless he started boot camp all over again.
We were like, Hell No. My mother would have died all over again thinking of putting the kid through that hell.
I didn't hear my son's voice the whole time he was at PI. We wrote letters, and that was it.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 06:59 PM (FsuaD)
Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at October 15, 2015 07:00 PM (HalrA)
The gum that goes **squirt**
Can't remember the table of elements but that jingle is lodged firmly.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag
We used to call it Cum Gum
Posted by: Bruce at October 15, 2015 07:00 PM (8ikIW)
Posted by: The janitor at October 15, 2015 07:00 PM (nSW/N)
Tried to explain Marine boot camp vs. what her Pajama Boy was "enduring" and she just didn't get it.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 06:48 PM (FsuaD)
A neighbor's son went to Lackland about two years ago.
Yeah. Pretty pathetic.
He ended up getting booted on a Medical. Stress fracture. I tried to impart on them that in actual Boot Camp, stress fracture simply meant the Drill Instructor never took his eyes off you so you wouldn't mess up the platoon during Drill Time on the grinder.
Blank stares with mouths agape.
Roam around the base? We never left the fuckin' squad bay, not in formation.
Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Staring at the Lake in the rain at October 15, 2015 07:01 PM (o8n43)
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at October 15, 2015 07:01 PM (9Fc79)
Posted by: Illiniwek at October 15, 2015 07:01 PM (dyyN5)
Yeah, so what? I still chew bubble gum and blow bubbles. Stop judging me.
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:01 PM (2x3L+)
Not a happy gal tonight.
Posted by: Russkilitlover at October 15, 2015 07:01 PM (WuE/x)
Yes, worse gum than that pinko Double Bubble garbage cheap people give out at Hallowe'en.
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:01 PM (VAsIq)
Posted by: Reggie1971 at October 15, 2015 07:01 PM (jEIZo)
So on the day they were rappelling in training, the DI says, "Hey, D'oh Boy, show the rest of these butt pirates how it's done."
I doubt they're even allowed to say that now.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 07:02 PM (FsuaD)
Not a happy gal tonight.
Posted by: Russkilitlover at October 15, 2015 07:01 PM (WuE/x)
Know that feeling, ma'am. I've had bad luck with cars lately myself. I recommend whiskey, it'll take the edge off the jangled nerves like nothing else.
Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at October 15, 2015 07:02 PM (HalrA)
The woman's body was discovered "near a fence line" in Chillicothe on Tuesday, police said in a news release.
Contractors working in the area believed the body was a decoration and went to remove it, Detective Bud Lytle, Chillicothe Police Department public information officer, told The Post.
When the mistake became clear, police were called to the scene, he said.
Posted by: Franklin Raines at October 15, 2015 07:02 PM (e8kgV)
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:03 PM (GZ6Pf)
Posted by: Colin at October 15, 2015 07:03 PM (Espnc)
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:03 PM (GZ6Pf)
Damn skippy. I used to go through that stuff by the boatload.
Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at October 15, 2015 07:03 PM (HalrA)
Gum ball machines...with gumballs in the baseball motif...
It was fun because they looked like little baseballs!
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:04 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 07:04 PM (LUgeY)
Posted by: Third Grader in handcuffs at October 15, 2015 07:04 PM (xudgf)
The worst gum? Zebra Fruit Striped Bubblegum. Lost its flavor in seconds
and, though billed as bubblegum, was the stickiest shit ever shat out
of a rubber tree.
Yes, worse gum than that pinko Double Bubble garbage cheap people give out at Hallowe'en.
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:01 PM (VAsIq)
I don't know about that. The "gum" they put in baseball card packs was awfully lame stuff.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at October 15, 2015 07:04 PM (4ErVI)
Look out, Watson! He has a bun!
Posted by: sherlock holmes at October 15, 2015 06:59 PM (m1pMI)
Never bring bun a to a pun fight.
Posted by: rebel flounder at October 15, 2015 07:05 PM (1DH1V)
Posted by: Nancy Pelosi at October 15, 2015 07:05 PM (e8kgV)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:06 PM (8HTq1)
This is triply stupid:
1) All based on something some child thought he heard.
2) So what if the kid had said "gun", anyway? Is that word the basis for a total lockdown, these days?
3) What is with the insane lowlifes running schools these days locking the place down every time the wind blows above 7 mph? Are they trying to turn the students into paranoid lunatics just like themselves? (Yeah, stupid question)
When I was in elementary school we used to sit waiting by the radio to hear our school number called while there was a foot of snow on the ground and more coming down ... to no avail. They wouldn't close school for snow unless it was some historic blizzard - truly historic. For my nephew's elementary school last winter, they closed the school at noon because there was a PREDICTION of a few inches of snow (which never came, BTW). Utterly insane.
They shouldn't call them "public schools" anymore. They should call them "Pussy Academies" - and not the good kind.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:06 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at October 15, 2015 07:04 PM (4ErVI)
I remember that. I remember trying one from a pack that was about 5 years old when I got it and broke a tooth on it. Granted, it was a baby tooth that was already loose, but still.
Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at October 15, 2015 07:06 PM (HalrA)
--------
You ain't kidding. What a disappointment. I could through a whole pack of those in less than 5 minutes. It seemed like it would be so good. The packaging and marketing really made it seem like it was gonna be your best gum experience ever. It was not.
Juicy Fruit was pretty good. The kind in the yellow pack.
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:07 PM (2x3L+)
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:07 PM (VAsIq)
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:07 PM (bYGAR)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:07 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 07:07 PM (FsuaD)
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:08 PM (VAsIq)
Problem is, they lock it down because some shit head burglar is on the run from the cops because someone saw him. Of course they don't want the kids leaving school because the criminal may be somewhere in the 10 mile radius of the school. So there they sit, with the doors locked.
Posted by: Bruce at October 15, 2015 07:08 PM (8ikIW)
I haven't chewed gum in years. I can't remember the last time.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 07:07 PM (FsuaD)
I had to stop when they started putting sorbitol in everything. Between that and my lack of a gallbladder, let's just say the results are explosive and leave it at that.
Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at October 15, 2015 07:08 PM (HalrA)
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:07 PM (bYGAR)
That was insulation, dear.
Posted by: Lauren's Mom at October 15, 2015 07:08 PM (8ZskC)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:08 PM (8HTq1)
Posted by: Lauren
Fruit by the Foot. That stuff was great.
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:08 PM (VAsIq)
What was that gum that came in the giant roll?
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:07 PM (bYGAR)
Bubble tape. Son1 loves that stuff.
Posted by: rebel flounder at October 15, 2015 07:08 PM (1DH1V)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:08 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: no good deed at October 15, 2015 07:09 PM (GgxVX)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:09 PM (2x3L+)
She had a dinner at her place in Chicago, and a friend's grown kid pulled his/her's gum out and placed it on the china plate.
Oprah was so freaked out, she threw away the plate after the dinner.\
And yet, she thrust Choom Boy on us, who famously chews nicotine gum, even at funerals.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 07:09 PM (FsuaD)
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at October 15, 2015 07:04 PM (4ErVI)
NASTY
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 07:09 PM (jJRIy)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:10 PM (8HTq1)
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:10 PM (VAsIq)
I am now the official "recess duty" supervisor, which means they pay me $20 to watch the kids while they eat lunch and run around, so the teachers can eat their lunches in peace. When the principal interviewed me, she asked what I would do if I saw two kids fighting.
My first response was, usually there aren't just two, once it gets started. But, be that as it may, it would be time to grab backs of collars and shipping each kid to a different corner.
She told me they prefer to not use "physical violence" to separate children.
Huh.
Well, I ain't taking a punch by stepping between them, so, collars it is.
There is a reason why cops "collar" suspects.
Honestly. The woman has no kids herself. Go figure.
Posted by: tcn in AK at October 15, 2015 07:10 PM (+YMhA)
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 07:11 PM (LUgeY)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:11 PM (8HTq1)
I had an unfortunate experience with a roll of sugar free mints I keep popping in my mouth. Let's just say that I learned my lesson.
Posted by: Tuna at October 15, 2015 07:11 PM (JSovD)
Posted by: Turd Ferguson
Under a Lincoln Chaffee administration, it would be Fruit by the Meter.
Posted by: Lincoln Chaffee at October 15, 2015 07:11 PM (8ZskC)
The kid was 20.
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:11 PM (VAsIq)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:11 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: First-Rate Political Hack at October 15, 2015 07:12 PM (J4OwT)
The urban legend was that Hubba Bubba(or Bubbleicious,I forget which) had spider eggs in it.
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:10 PM (8HTq1)
If you bought them from the Gas Station From Hell where I used to work, they damn sure might have. You had to go through the candy regularly because our supplier was indifferent about their warehousing practices, and occasionally creepy crawlies would lay their eggs on things. If you didn't catch 'em early, they'd chew through the wrappers and into the product.
Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at October 15, 2015 07:12 PM (HalrA)
Honestly. The woman has no kids herself. Go figure.
Posted by: tcn in AK at October 15, 2015 07:10 PM (+YMhA)
Sweep the leg, also an acceptable answer. Placing bets, however? Strongly discouraged.
Posted by: rebel flounder at October 15, 2015 07:12 PM (1DH1V)
---
Two go in, one comes out. Thunderdome!
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 15, 2015 07:12 PM (jR7Wy)
But I did go through a lot of that fruity gum as a kid.
Posted by: Chi at October 15, 2015 07:12 PM (ifloA)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:12 PM (2x3L+)
little wax "nip" bottles filled with candy liquid
You know, for alchie kids...
How else are you going to teach them about miniatures?
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 07:13 PM (LUgeY)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:13 PM (8HTq1)
Yeah, I remember when Mt. St. Helens blew it's top and it rained ash for a week. 2" of ash? No problem. Get your asses to school, boys and girls.
Posted by: Fritz at October 15, 2015 07:14 PM (3tjn4)
When I was in elementary school we used to sit waiting by the radio to hear our school number called while there was a foot of snow on the ground and more coming down ... to no avail. They wouldn't close school for snow unless it was some historic blizzard - truly historic. For my nephew's elementary school last winter, they closed the school at noon because there was a PREDICTION of a few inches of snow (which never came, BTW). Utterly insane.
They shouldn't call them "public schools" anymore. They should call them "Pussy Academies" - and not the good kind.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:06 PM (zc3Db)
Back in 1977 we got a new Suprintendent for the New Year. About January 10th and the fifth snowstorm of the year, he cancelled classes because of the storm. Two days later we are all at a school, and our teachers are all saying he made a mistake, because he was used to Michigan lake effect snow storms, and tell your parents to STOP CALLING!!!
Posted by: Mindless Idiots Everywhere at October 15, 2015 07:14 PM (SukjU)
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 07:14 PM (LUgeY)
Posted by: bergerbilder at October 15, 2015 07:14 PM (djBqY)
Thanks to Al Gore, Amazon, and the internet I can still buy it.
Posted by: se pa moron at October 15, 2015 07:14 PM (sI4OA)
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 15, 2015 07:12 PM (jR7Wy)
I considered saying that I would do exactly nothing until blood was drawn, but I determined that I probably would not get the job by saying so.
I also considered saying "knock their heads together," which was my mom's fave, but, once again, if you want the job....
Posted by: tcn in AK at October 15, 2015 07:14 PM (+YMhA)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:12 PM (2x3L+)
Junk, junk, junk, so-so.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:14 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: L, Elle
Fun Dip was wonderful. We used to snort pixy stix in elementary school. And smarties. But the pixy stix were better for snorting because they came in their own little tube, just right for little nostrils.
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:14 PM (VAsIq)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:14 PM (8HTq1)
The kid was 20.
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:11 PM (VAsIq)
--------
And you knows me how exactly?
jk
That's disgusting. I used to wait tables and hated having to scrape the gum off the bottom of tables. Such bad manners.
On second thought, maybe this kid is doing all waitresses a favor.
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:15 PM (2x3L+)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:15 PM (8HTq1)
it was like the most exciting thing I did with my mouth up until 9th grade
Posted by: Bigby's Knuckle Sandwich at October 15, 2015 07:15 PM (Cq0oW)
Anything that had dual usage always fascinated me.
A wax harmonica. A crayon box with a built-in crayon sharpener. A Twizzler used as a straw.
I was born quite the Utilitarian.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:16 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:16 PM (8HTq1)
I also considered saying "knock their heads together," which was my mom's fave, but, once again, if you want the job....
That's why God made ears.
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 07:16 PM (LUgeY)
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 15, 2015 07:12 PM (jR7Wy)
Best response ever. Seriously, you're awesome.
Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at October 15, 2015 07:16 PM (HalrA)
A place where I used to work, people used to bring leftover candy in after Hallowe'en. I opened a Tootsie roll to discover tiny bugs all over it.
Turns out, those were from the previous Hallowe'en.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at October 15, 2015 07:17 PM (2lndx)
Yep. That's it. We used to have contests to see how much of that we could shove in our mouths.
Children are awful.
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:17 PM (GZ6Pf)
I was born quite the Utilitarian.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:16 PM (Fv3UZ)
Boobies were a real hit, huh? Pillow, lunch, punching bag . . . .
Posted by: rebel flounder at October 15, 2015 07:17 PM (1DH1V)
Posted by: steevy
I remember Rodney Dangerfield telling a story about how he once came home late, after everyone was already asleep, so he kept the lights off as he smoked some weed to relax. Wandered into the kitchen for a snack and saw a cake on the counter. After eating about half the cake, he got up to refill his glass of milk and he saw something on the counter. Turns the lights on and sees that the remaining cake is being swarmed with ants.
Posted by: Prince Ludwig the #Problematic at October 15, 2015 07:17 PM (awspb)
Posted by: Snoodling World Champion 1997 at October 15, 2015 07:17 PM (k9qR4)
Posted by: tcn in AK at October 15, 2015 07:10 PM (+YMhA)
vi·o·lence
noun
behavior involving physical force intended to hurt, damage, or kill someone or something.
Either she doesn't know her own strength or the meaning of the word violence. Either way...
Posted by: First-Rate Political Hack at October 15, 2015 07:18 PM (J4OwT)
"Bubble tape."
Yep. That's it. We used to have contests to see how much of that we could shove in our mouths.
Children are
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:17 PM (GZ6Pf)
Posted by: rebel flounder at October 15, 2015 07:18 PM (1DH1V)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:18 PM (2x3L+)
Posted by: Joe Biden at October 15, 2015 07:18 PM (8ZskC)
It was a more innocent time.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 15, 2015 07:19 PM (jR7Wy)
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:19 PM (VAsIq)
We also learned science, mathematics, grammar, and real history, including memorization of things like names and dates and multiplication tables. We sat indian style, we played smear the queer on the playground, we used sleds with metal runners and went ice skating at lunch time, and we threw snowballs at one another. In high school, my truck had a full gun rack in the rear window.
Apparently, not one of those things happen at my son's school, or if they do, they involve suspensions and such. I'm pretty sure this is the result of letting all the nancy boys go to teachers college. I doubt many of the parents think any of this lightweight nonsense is the way to go.
Posted by: tcn in AK at October 15, 2015 07:19 PM (+YMhA)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:19 PM (Fv3UZ)
It was a more innocent time.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 15, 2015 07:19 PM (jR7Wy)
Did they let you demonstrate it? With the slow fat kid?
Posted by: tcn in AK at October 15, 2015 07:20 PM (+YMhA)
child: Worse? How can it get any worse! Gun! Assault rifle! Howitzer!
Cleese: If you say *gun* just one more time! ... [rest of class picks up heavy objects and hurls them at John Cleese] ...AAAAAARGGH!!!
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at October 15, 2015 07:20 PM (g0dZ5)
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 07:20 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Chi at October 15, 2015 07:20 PM (ifloA)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:18 PM (2x3L+)
---
Doctors should have a joke x-ray ready to show kids who chew gum. "See that baseball-sized blob there? We're gonna have to cut it out!"
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 15, 2015 07:21 PM (jR7Wy)
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:21 PM (GZ6Pf)
>>craziest gum was the Gatorade gum holy crap
YES!
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 07:20 PM (NOIQH)
THAT STUFF!
Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at October 15, 2015 07:21 PM (HalrA)
Posted by: Meremortal at October 15, 2015 07:21 PM (hTqVx)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:18 PM (2x3L+)
Nope. This too shall pass.
Posted by: tcn in AK at October 15, 2015 07:21 PM (+YMhA)
The kid was 20.
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:11 PM (VAsIq)
And today he's Vice President of the United States!
Posted by: rickl at October 15, 2015 07:22 PM (sdi6R)
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 07:22 PM (NOIQH)
I'm so old that we said "Just shoot me" in school all the time and no one paid the slightest attention.
Posted by: Meremortal at October 15, 2015 07:21 PM (hTqVx)
That was me about every 17 seconds in high school. Grunge era, so nobody paid it any mind...
Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at October 15, 2015 07:22 PM (HalrA)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:23 PM (2x3L+)
Posted by: chemjeff at October 15, 2015 07:23 PM (Aq/wC)
Posted by: Tuna at October 15, 2015 07:23 PM (JSovD)
It was a more innocent time.
Posted by: All Hail Eris
---------------------
I used to take a bottle of wine to Miss Wheeler when I was in sixth grade for her birthday, Christmas, etc.
Man did I have a crush on her... Every Dad in town did, too, I bet.
Yes, Mom actually bought wine for me to take to my teacher. And back then, it was considered "cute," not attempted rape.
Posted by: Chi at October 15, 2015 07:25 PM (ifloA)
The acronym is pronounced "fuck 'em."
Posted by: the littl shyning man at October 15, 2015 07:25 PM (U6f54)
I brought a real seppuku knife into school for Show and Tell, complete with gruesome war story.
It was a more innocent time.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 15, 2015 07:19 PM (jR7Wy)
That's awesome. I once brought a Nazi gun to school (in Germany) that my dad had. Everyone passed it around.
Imagine the vapors one of today's "teachers" would have.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 07:25 PM (FsuaD)
minister who lived across the street and we called Minister always had Blackjack gum and always gave it out.
which was kinda one of his jokes i think
Posted by: Bigby's Knuckle Sandwich at October 15, 2015 07:26 PM (Cq0oW)
To avoid being offensive, I'd suggest the AoS regulars start spelling 'gun' as 'gnu'.
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at October 15, 2015 07:26 PM (g0dZ5)
Posted by: Tuna
Beemans...Aids digestion
Also Black Jack, and Teaberry
Plus Chiclets
Posted by: Bruce at October 15, 2015 07:26 PM (8ikIW)
Posted by: Tuna at October 15, 2015 07:23 PM
-------
Vic might. Was that the preferred gum from the ancient world?
jk
Those brands must predate me.
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:26 PM (2x3L+)
Man, today you'd be arrested as a sexual predator and your parents arrested for serving a minor.
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 07:26 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Prince Ludwig the #Problematic at October 15, 2015 07:27 PM (awspb)
Posted by: tcn in AK at October 15, 2015 07:20 PM (+YMhA)
---
I did mime the correct left-to-right with bonus up-down crosscut pattern for committing hellokitty.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, self-aware douchebag at October 15, 2015 07:27 PM (jR7Wy)
Even Chuckie Shoom-Shoom.
Terrorist.
Posted by: the littl shyning man at October 15, 2015 07:27 PM (U6f54)
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 07:27 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: L, Elle
No, he'd sample several, but put them all back.
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:28 PM (VAsIq)
Posted by: chemjeff at October 15, 2015 07:28 PM (Aq/wC)
Posted by: Tuna at October 15, 2015 07:23 PM (JSovD)
Why yes, yes I do.
Posted by: Chuck Yaeger at October 15, 2015 07:32 PM (sdi6R)
I'm offended.
Posted by: sensitive wildebeest with expressive hooves at October 15, 2015 07:32 PM (dRE+S)
Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at October 15, 2015 07:33 PM (HalrA)
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at October 15, 2015 07:04 PM (4ErVI)
You got baseball cards when you could have gotten Rat Patrol cards. The gum was still crappy, but you could flip the cards over and make a big picture of a jeep with a 50. But some kids got baseball cards. The mind boggles.
Posted by: Delurk Ergo Sum at October 15, 2015 07:33 PM (zetif)
I had dunking Oreos down to a science. I would, literally, count the exact seconds it would take to make the Oreo semi-mushy.
I had no use for that Double Stuff stuff.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:33 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: Navycopjoe at October 15, 2015 07:34 PM (nWM2V)
Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel at October 15, 2015 07:35 PM (0O7c5)
Posted by: Prince Ludwig the #Problematic
----------------------
Yep. I never left the house without my Old Timer in my pocket as a kid. Starting at age 10 or so.
By the time I got to high school, there was a metal detector at the front door. Rumor was, it was the first school so equipped in the state.
Posted by: Chi at October 15, 2015 07:35 PM (ifloA)
what has become of our country?
Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel at October 15, 2015 07:35 PM (0O7c5)
My operating theory is that not enough idiots get the stupid smacked out of them. Smack an idiot today!
Posted by: Cato the Rebel Without a Party at October 15, 2015 07:35 PM (HalrA)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:35 PM (2x3L+)
Posted by: rickl at October 15, 2015 06:36 PM (sdi6R)
Now they're teaching our kids about dick-on-dicktion.
Posted by: Insomniac at October 15, 2015 07:37 PM (kpqmD)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:33 PM (Fv3UZ)
Blasphemer!
I would take apart Double stuffs and put the white sides together to make Quadruple stuffs. .... and it still wasn't enough!
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:37 PM (zc3Db)
But I can still get it up if you'e young and succulent.
I knew Feud back in the day. He was a perv. The worst sort. A**hole. Demented. Paranoid. PoS.
That said, a lot of this gun phobia is mild compared with that guy, all preoccupied with sex within the family.
Family sex, like Obama? Just burn the house down, and put 4 guys with 12-gauges on all sides to shoot the would-be escapees. In Ogabe's case, use bacalm (bacon + napalm).
Posted by: I knew Freud back in Austria at October 15, 2015 07:37 PM (d8VfW)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 07:38 PM (FsuaD)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:38 PM (Fv3UZ)
We called them quads
Posted by: Navycopjoe at October 15, 2015 07:38 PM (nWM2V)
You got baseball cards when you could have
gotten Rat Patrol cards. The gum was still crappy, but you could flip
the cards over and make a big picture of a jeep with a 50. But some
kids got baseball cards. The mind boggles.
Posted by: Delurk Ergo Sum at October 15, 2015 07:33 PM (zetif)
Some baseball cards but I always bought Wacky Packages. Anyone remember those? They were stickers that took a product and made fun of it. Cult 45 for Colt 45 and Gadzooka for Bazooka gum.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at October 15, 2015 07:39 PM (4ErVI)
I'd prefer to use a cattle prod, but I like your idea too.
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 07:39 PM (LUgeY)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:39 PM (2x3L+)
254. -_-
Stares at chemjeff
Posted by: Navycopjoe at October 15, 2015 07:34 PM (nWM2V)
Okay okay
Posted by: chemjeff at October 15, 2015 07:39 PM (Aq/wC)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:39 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: L, Elle
--------------------
The minute I read "mint oreos" I thought of him.
That was our last conversation...
Posted by: Chi at October 15, 2015 07:39 PM (ifloA)
Posted by: phoenixgirl, i was born a rebel at October 15, 2015 07:35 PM (0O7c5)
It's dead.
Posted by: Insomniac at October 15, 2015 07:39 PM (kpqmD)
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 15, 2015 07:39 PM (rwI+c)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:40 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:40 PM (8HTq1)
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis
Prolly not as good as Garbage Pail Kids....
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 07:40 PM (VAsIq)
They are. You just have to breech the coating with some judicious nibbling.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 15, 2015 07:40 PM (rwI+c)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 07:40 PM (FsuaD)
Anybody remember Clove Gum and Beeman's Gum ?
Posted by: Tuna at October 15, 2015 07:23 PM (JSovD)
Yeah, I think Amazon still sells it. Remember Sen Sen mouth fresher?
http://tinyurl.com/pjkbrpa
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 07:41 PM (jJRIy)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:23 PM (2x3L+)
Hmm. How old are you now?
Posted by: Fagin at October 15, 2015 07:41 PM (8ZskC)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:41 PM (2x3L+)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:41 PM (8HTq1)
Posted by: wth - what I learned today at AoS at October 15, 2015 07:41 PM (wAQA5)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 07:42 PM (FsuaD)
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 07:39 PM (LUgeY)
Like from the movie Casino, right? So who gets to be DeNiro and bust the fucker's hand up with a hammer?
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at October 15, 2015 07:42 PM (4ErVI)
You just have to breech the coating with some judicious nibbling.
Then you have to wonder if it's worth the effort.
Or do a cost-benefit analysis.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:42 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: Sharkman at October 15, 2015 07:42 PM (Uj5fT)
Concealed Cherry, Purple Grapeshot, Strawberrage, Peppermissle. etc.
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at October 15, 2015 07:42 PM (g0dZ5)
We called them quads
Posted by: Navycopjoe at October 15, 2015 07:38 PM (nWM2V)
Have you seen the new Thin Oreos? The first time I saw them I thought, "What sort of retard would buy those things?"
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:42 PM (zc3Db)
Anybody remember Clove Gum and Beeman's Gum ?
Posted by: Tuna at October 15, 2015 07:23 PM (JSovD)
Yeah, I think Amazon still sells it. Remember Sen Sen mouth fresher?
http://tinyurl.com/pjkbrpa
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 07:41 PM (jJRIy)
And bragging all about how you were to cover up your tell-tale breath with it?
Posted by: Insomniac at October 15, 2015 07:42 PM (kpqmD)
If you didn't mime pulling out your own bowels/entrails too, then you're a pussy and do the Emperor dishonour.
Posted by: andycanuck at October 15, 2015 07:43 PM (m1pMI)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 07:42 PM (FsuaD)
LOL. You beat me to it!
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:43 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: Insomniac at October 15, 2015 07:43 PM (kpqmD)
I ask for Gum every Sunday.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 15, 2015 07:39 PM (rwI+c)
Swallow?
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 07:44 PM (jJRIy)
Stella D'Oro breakfast treats for dipping in coffee.
Yeah, it's more of a necessity in this case.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:44 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:42 PM (zc3Db)
I like to mash 'em up in a big bowl with milk. Breakfast of tampons....err...champions!
Posted by: Joey Biden at October 15, 2015 07:44 PM (FsuaD)
Posted by: steevy at October 15, 2015 07:45 PM (8HTq1)
What are those half moon shaped really hard coffee cookies called? Crusty as all get out. But when you give them a good long soaking, they're quite tasty.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:45 PM (Fv3UZ)
I was thinking more like a smaller one, taser-sized but with a lot more oomph. Enough to make sure whichever imbecile I zap will fall away from me.
I don't want any imbecile cooties.
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 07:45 PM (LUgeY)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:45 PM (2x3L+)
Posted by: Chi at October 15, 2015 07:45 PM (ifloA)
got my kid hooked on those archway windmills
not great, no, but i prefer the traditions
Posted by: Bigby's Knuckle Sandwich at October 15, 2015 07:45 PM (Cq0oW)
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:46 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 07:46 PM (FsuaD)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:47 PM (2x3L+)
Nilla Wafers stink. Let's just admit it.
But when you dunk a Nilla Wafer in milk, it's a fine cookie treat.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:47 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 07:47 PM (FsuaD)
OK I am marinading some tip steak over night in Dales. Don't want to cook it till tomorrow night. Should I drain the marinade in the morning so it doesn't over marinade?
Or will it matter?
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 07:47 PM (jJRIy)
Yep! Grew up outside of Steamboat. We had one snow day ever. And it was a glorious, sunny day after about a week of blizzards. That was a great day on the mountain.
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:48 PM (LzzEz)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:48 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:48 PM (zc3Db)
But when you dunk a Nilla Wafer in milk, it's a fine cookie treat.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo
Or mix with bananas and vanilla pudding.
Posted by: Prince Ludwig the #Problematic at October 15, 2015 07:48 PM (awspb)
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at October 15, 2015 07:48 PM (9Fc79)
But when you dunk a Nilla Wafer in milk, it's a fine cookie treat.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo
Or mix with bananas and vanilla pudding.
Posted by: Prince Ludwig the #Problematic at October 15, 2015 07:48 PM (awspb)
Yeccch. I hate banana pudding!
Posted by: Insomniac at October 15, 2015 07:49 PM (kpqmD)
cookies called? Crusty as all get out. But when you give them a good
long soaking, they're quite tasty.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:45 PM (Fv3UZ)
Taste like anise? Biscotti?
The Italian cure for fragile teeth?
Posted by: Kindltot at October 15, 2015 07:49 PM (3pRHP)
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:49 PM (LzzEz)
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 07:50 PM (jJRIy)
If he does it right, his testosterone will go up so that you will have no peace if you don't like the rod.
If your ages are right, could be a new moron in the oven!
Posted by: I knew Freud back in Austria at October 15, 2015 07:50 PM (d8VfW)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:51 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:47 PM (Fv3UZ)
I love Nilla Wafers! They were long my favorites, dry or not.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:51 PM (zc3Db)
Also, Michelle Obama ruined them. They changed to whole wheat crap to appease the diet nazis that control the school menus.
How stupid.
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:51 PM (LzzEz)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:51 PM (Fv3UZ)
There was absolutely zero panic
The principal actually did a good job
Lawyers and the media make this look ridiculous since the school staff is required to act accordingly. Quit acting like a load of fuktards on a slow day.
Posted by: common sense at October 15, 2015 07:50 PM (LPHFE)
You ride the short bus, I see ...
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:52 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at October 15, 2015 07:53 PM (9Fc79)
I am trying to think of anything good that came out of Minneapolis.
Audio recording technology?
Honeywell's weapons?
Grasping here, help me?!?
Posted by: I knew Freud back in Austria at October 15, 2015 07:53 PM (d8VfW)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:51 PM (Fv3UZ)
Yeah. I always thought they were total shit.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:53 PM (zc3Db)
My hubby teases my son in all sorts of old school ways at home. Think he does it just so that the kid never develops oversensitivity to PC things --- and he has an excellent, subversive sense of humor because of it.
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 07:53 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 07:53 PM (jJRIy)
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 07:53 PM (zOTsN)
Posted by: Skip at October 15, 2015 07:53 PM (Ken0l)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo
Was it because they lacked enough chocolate? They could add more and rebrand as Famous Amos & Andy cookies.
Posted by: Prince Ludwig the #Problematic at October 15, 2015 07:53 PM (awspb)
Posted by: no good deed at October 15, 2015 07:54 PM (GgxVX)
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at October 15, 2015 07:54 PM (g0dZ5)
Posted by: I knew Freud back in Austria at October 15, 2015 07:53 PM (d8VfW)
The Mary Tyler Moore show?
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:54 PM (zc3Db)
I would like to take a moment to laugh online about the Bernie Sanders and Jim Webb supporters realizing that the media is biased against their cause.
Hahahahaha. Welcome to the Club. Hahahahahaha. How's it feel? Bwahhahahaha.
Ok. Thank you for your indulgence.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at October 15, 2015 07:55 PM (ODxAs)
The problem with Famous Amos was they had all bunch of crap in them and still tasted meh. And they were hard, like stale.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:55 PM (Fv3UZ)
Nonononono. I did that once and it was the worst mistake I ever made. Pull the steak out of it IMMEDIATELY and rinse it off well.
That is not how you use Dale's.
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 07:55 PM (LUgeY)
So, so yummy.
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 07:55 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 07:55 PM (jJRIy)
And Dutch Windmill cookies for tea because that is what Dad liked. Sometimes taste is not the most important thing.
Posted by: Delurk Ergo Sum at October 15, 2015 07:55 PM (zetif)
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at October 15, 2015 07:55 PM (9Fc79)
Posted by: common sense at October 15, 2015 07:54 PM (LPHFE)
LOL. They'd go total lockdown on school if someone heard you say that.
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:55 PM (zc3Db)
Posted by: Skip at October 15, 2015 07:56 PM (Ken0l)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 07:56 PM (Fv3UZ)
favorite college memory
at the lake
sitting at the end of the dock
toes in the water at dawn, drinking a Bud and eating a Pecan Sandie
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 07:56 PM (zOTsN)
Posted by: chemjeff at October 15, 2015 07:57 PM (Aq/wC)
-----
Oh man! You have got to be kidding. That is the only way to make Nilla Wafers worse. Who buys these Nilla Wafers anyway? They should be out of business by now. I think it's the white trash people and illegals.
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 07:57 PM (2x3L+)
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 07:57 PM (jJRIy)
Posted by: Weasel at October 15, 2015 07:58 PM (e3bId)
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at October 15, 2015 07:58 PM (9Fc79)
Posted by: chemjeff at October 15, 2015 07:58 PM (Aq/wC)
like crack they are
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 07:58 PM (zOTsN)
Chessmen cookies are the way to go for banana pudding. Paula Deen's Not Yo Momma's Banana Pudding recipe is sinful.
Posted by: no good deed at October 15, 2015 07:58 PM (GgxVX)
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (NOIQH)
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (LzzEz)
-------------------------
Morris Day and The Time.
Posted by: Chi at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (ifloA)
Have you seen the new Thin Oreos? The first time I saw them I thought, "What sort of retard would buy those things?"
Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 15, 2015 07:42 PM (zc3Db)
They go well with skinny jeans, I guess.
Posted by: Chuck Yaeger at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (sdi6R)
I'll just keep them in frig and shake some steak seasoning, Costcos which they stopped making, on them?
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (jJRIy)
Posted by: Buffalbob at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (Eo1Mo)
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (zOTsN)
The school staff is required to act ridiculous? Yes, that's the problem. Kudos to the media and lawyers for bringing attention to it, for a change.
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (g0dZ5)
Posted by: Skip at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (Ken0l)
So the rumor mill says Jeb is about drop out.
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (LzzEz)
yes please yes please yes please yes please yes
Posted by: chemjeff at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (Aq/wC)
Posted by: I knew Freud back in Austria at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (d8VfW)
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 15, 2015 08:00 PM (rwI+c)
I think the Keebler elves may be ghey.
Posted by: wth - what I learned today at AoS at October 15, 2015 08:00 PM (wAQA5)
Posted by: Turd Ferguson at October 15, 2015 08:00 PM (VAsIq)
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at October 15, 2015 08:01 PM (9Fc79)
Posted by: Skip at October 15, 2015 08:01 PM (Ken0l)
Posted by: Weasel
I concur. Your oeuvre is to be cherished. I laughed, I cried. How you didn't get the Oscar is beyond me.
Posted by: James Lipton at October 15, 2015 08:01 PM (awspb)
I never told anyone this before, but in Sophomore year, I put a rubber on the doorknob to the teacher's lav (bathroom).
You would've thought I planted a bomb. The entire faculty had a fit. There was talk of expulsion.
You know how I got caught?
I stood close by so's I could see the reaction of the first teacher to go for the doorknob. So...there I was...at the scene of the crime.
I'm much, much smarter today.
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 08:01 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: yobobbyb at October 15, 2015 08:01 PM (zdCuc)
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 15, 2015 08:01 PM (rwI+c)
Posted by: Bert and Ernie at October 15, 2015 08:01 PM (Aq/wC)
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 08:01 PM (zOTsN)
Posted by: Weasel at October 15, 2015 08:01 PM (e3bId)
I've been using it exclusively for a long, long time. When I moved down here, Publix didn't carry it. I talked the local store's manager into getting it (he'd never even heard of it) and within a few months, it was in every store here.
They're welcome.
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 08:02 PM (LUgeY)
Everybody has one. The important thing is- is that how they self-identify?
That was supposed to be at least a little funny. Oh well.
Posted by: Delurk Ergo Sum at October 15, 2015 08:02 PM (zetif)
My God, you just reminded me of Mint Brussels. Fortunately, Pepperidge Farm discontinued them, or I would need an extra-wide chair. They were the only packaged cookies I would go out of my way for.
Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at October 15, 2015 08:02 PM (2lndx)
Posted by: Virgil Starkwell
---
I loved that film. "Let's take a vote. Would you rather be robbed by us or by them?" How does he come up with that stuff?
Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at October 15, 2015 08:03 PM (g0dZ5)
Let's focus on what's important here. Who are the Cubs going to smack around?
Posted by: grammie winger, Isa al-Masih for muslims too at October 15, 2015 08:03 PM (dFi94)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 08:03 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (LzzEz)
Conservative Treehouse hardest hit.
Posted by: Chuck Yaeger at October 15, 2015 08:03 PM (sdi6R)
students council sold grapefruit to pay for some trip they wanted to take
so I bought the grapefruit
and lobbed it into the typing class over the partition
I cant believe I got away with that
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 08:03 PM (zOTsN)
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at October 15, 2015 08:03 PM (9Fc79)
The longer it sits there the more it expands. Impossible to move without it breaking.
Great fun for some asshole on the hall.
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 08:03 PM (jJRIy)
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 15, 2015 08:03 PM (rwI+c)
Posted by: Weasel at October 15, 2015 08:04 PM (e3bId)
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 08:04 PM (NOIQH)
They're gonna be all "self-defense" 'n' shit.
WTF?!?
Jus' sayin", is all.
https://youtu.be/4H-qOUmCrIU
Posted by: I knew Freud back in Austria at October 15, 2015 08:04 PM (d8VfW)
Posted by: grammie winger, Isa al-Masih for muslims too at October 15, 2015 08:04 PM (dFi94)
Posted by: Skip at October 15, 2015 08:04 PM (Ken0l)
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 08:04 PM (zOTsN)
Posted by: Joe Biden at October 15, 2015 08:05 PM (8ZskC)
360 So the rumor mill says Jeb is about drop out.
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 07:59 PM (LzzEz)
Well, things must be bad. He's driving around Iowa and staying cheap hotel. No more private jets.
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 08:05 PM (jJRIy)
Posted by: Hillary! Rodham-Rodham at October 15, 2015 08:05 PM (awspb)
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 08:05 PM (zOTsN)
Oh, the humanity!!!
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at October 15, 2015 08:06 PM (8ZskC)
Posted by: skzion at October 15, 2015 08:06 PM (ujzBf)
Posted by: Weasel at October 15, 2015 08:06 PM (e3bId)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 08:06 PM (2x3L+)
I did this for about a week straight and never got caught.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 15, 2015 08:06 PM (rwI+c)
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 08:06 PM (zOTsN)
Posted by: davidt at October 15, 2015 08:07 PM (Mz/Zg)
Posted by: Weasel at October 15, 2015 08:07 PM (e3bId)
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 15, 2015 08:07 PM (LUgeY)
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 08:07 PM (bYGAR)
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 15, 2015 08:07 PM (rwI+c)
Posted by: Mets/Dodgers Game 5 at October 15, 2015 08:07 PM (lqmAz)
Posted by: Eromero at October 15, 2015 08:07 PM (go5uR)
One day I put the stub of the cigarette on the floor, then put the fuse of a firecracker up by the filter.
That is a fantastic trick. It's too bad I learnt it after high school...
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 08:08 PM (Fv3UZ)
You ever consider adding a little more kick?
Posted by: Bill Ayers at October 15, 2015 08:08 PM (8ZskC)
Posted by: Nathen Filgrim at October 15, 2015 08:08 PM (dshZN)
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 15, 2015 08:08 PM (rwI+c)
Posted by: Weasel at October 15, 2015 08:09 PM (e3bId)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 08:10 PM (2x3L+)
I was in drivers' ed during the summer when the school had to be evacuated because some kid sprayed pepperspray into one of the big fans in the hall. The AC had gone out and it was hot as hell. That kid...was my little brother. He did get caught.
Posted by: no good deed at October 15, 2015 08:10 PM (GgxVX)
Oh no! If he drops out Heb will be hanging around the house and bothering me for the sex all the time.
Posted by: Columba at October 15, 2015 08:10 PM (c7vUv)
Posted by: Mets/Dodgers Game 5 at October 15, 2015 08:10 PM (lqmAz)
I learned it from Stalag 17.
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 15, 2015 08:10 PM (rwI+c)
And now you assholes are talking about cookies and pie.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 08:10 PM (FsuaD)
I like pie.
Posted by: Joe Biden
Not as much as I do!
Posted by: Hillary! Rodham-Rodham
...................
Meat pie doesn't count.
Posted by: wth - what I learned today at AoS at October 15, 2015 08:10 PM (wAQA5)
Come over here and sit down.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at October 15, 2015 08:11 PM (8ZskC)
Posted by: Weasel at October 15, 2015 08:11 PM (e3bId)
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 08:11 PM (NOIQH)
"staying cheap hotel. "
Slumming in a Holiday Inn Express?
Posted by: Lauren at October 15, 2015 08:07 PM (bYGAR)
Nah, he might learn something.
Posted by: Nip Sip at October 15, 2015 08:11 PM (jJRIy)
https://goo.gl/sOtoq5
Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at October 15, 2015 08:11 PM (iQIUe)
Posted by: Soothsayer, with arms akimbo at October 15, 2015 08:11 PM (Fv3UZ)
Posted by: Grump928(C) at October 15, 2015 08:11 PM (rwI+c)
Posted by: skzion at October 15, 2015 08:11 PM (ujzBf)
Posted by: Joe Biden
Not as much as I do!
Posted by: Hillary! Rodham-Rodham
Shaddap, the both o' youz!
Posted by: Chris Christie at October 15, 2015 08:12 PM (VAsIq)
Posted by: L, Elle at October 15, 2015 08:12 PM (2x3L+)
Just for the hell of it.
Bwahahahahahahaha!
Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 15, 2015 08:12 PM (FsuaD)
Posted by: Eromero
I thought that was going to be that Mickey Spillane quote.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at October 15, 2015 08:13 PM (9Fc79)
------------
Between the two of us, we saved America for settlers, Europe from the Huns, the entire Pacific from the Japs, and Earth from the alien horde * (the bad horde, not the good horde). The only group I don't ever remember shooting up was the Russians. I seem to have missed my chance.
But yeah, we turned out all right.
*We must have missed a few. Alien tentacle invaders are really messing with Japanese girls. It's on the interwebs so it must be true. Or so I've heard.
Posted by: Old Blue at October 15, 2015 08:13 PM (9iR5/)
They're destroy every historic site in the ME, aren't they?
Posted by: Lizzy at October 15, 2015 08:14 PM (NOIQH)
challenges regarding my comments on the "As Palestinians Butcher
Israelis in the Street" thread. I'd appreciate it if some who disagreed
(or agreed) with me would visit this and comment. Just go to 336.
Thanks.
Posted by: skzion at October 15, 2015 08:06 PM (ujzBf)
============================
I did go back and read it. Some of the information you included is new to me, so I will have to look at some other sources of Jewish/Israeli information that I have found to be trustworthy in the past. I appreciate the time you took to carefully lay out your point of view. Most of the time, readers here will tend to stay on the top-most thread, or perhaps the one just prior to it, so don't be disappointed if you get a low level of response. Thank you for the material you presented. I appreciate learning new things, new to me, at least.
Posted by: grammie winger, Isa al-Masih for muslims too at October 15, 2015 08:16 PM (dFi94)
Posted by: skzion at October 15, 2015 08:11 PM (ujzBf)
==========================
I think what happened is you copied and pasted from Word Document. Try using Notepad instead, and you won't wind up in the barrel.
Posted by: grammie winger, Isa al-Masih for muslims too at October 15, 2015 08:18 PM (dFi94)
Palestinian rioters set ablaze Joseph's Tomb in Nablus, a Jewish holy site.
https://goo.gl/sOtoq5
Posted by: Bruce With a Wang! at October 15, 2015 08:11 PM (iQIUe)
Why of course. This site is in what is erroneously called the "West Bank." (It is really Judea and Samaria.) Israel's elites want to sever, as much as possible, any significant Biblical ties with the Land. Judea and Samaria contain the lion's share of the most important sites. The Temple Mount is the most important site, and Jews neither run it nor can pray there.
Surely some of you have wondered about that.
Posted by: skzion at October 15, 2015 08:18 PM (ujzBf)
One day I put the stub of the cigarette on the floor, then put the fuse of a firecracker up by the filter.
---------
That is a fantastic trick. It's too bad I learnt it after high school...
Posted by: Soothsayer
--------------------------
We were doing that "time delay fuse" trick as tweeners. Fun stuff.
Remember smoke bombs? I was fascinated by them. I used to throw them everywhere. I once rolled half a dozen of them down the hallway in Jr high. Never got caught.
Posted by: Chi at October 15, 2015 08:18 PM (ifloA)
skion I appreciate your more thorough remarks
the settlements you refer to are sometimes apartment buildings across the highway in Jerusalem
those people are Jewish working class, not religious nuts
Israel is very dependant on foreign investment. Not loans, but business investment. They are petrified of the BDS movement, which compares Israel to South African apartheid and advocates economic isolation as the cure
this would destroy Israel's economy
I love your solution of removing all arabs from Israel. I think it is the only workable solution. However, no matter how much you or I like it, the rest of the world would destroy Israel's economy for it
and I am still not clear. Are you for or against the settlements and the settlers?
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 08:19 PM (zOTsN)
Word Document. Try using Notepad instead, and you won't wind up in the
barrel.
Posted by: grammie winger, Isa al-Masih for muslims too at October 15, 2015 08:18 PM (dFi94)
That is EXACTLY what I did (I used Word). Thanks for the suggestion. And thanks for reading!
Posted by: skzion at October 15, 2015 08:20 PM (ujzBf)
Posted by: skzion at October 15, 2015 08:18 PM (ujzBf)
==========================
Wouldn't severing the Biblical sites dramatically cut into their tourism industry?
Posted by: grammie winger, Isa al-Masih for muslims too at October 15, 2015 08:21 PM (dFi94)
Posted by: skzion at October 15, 2015 08:20 PM (ujzBf)
---------------------------
You are very welcome.
Posted by: grammie winger, Isa al-Masih for muslims too at October 15, 2015 08:21 PM (dFi94)
the temple mount is part of the temple complex and should never be surrendered
there should be no part of Israel a Jew cannot go
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 08:22 PM (zOTsN)
Posted by: rickl at October 15, 2015 08:24 PM (sdi6R)
is that right?
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 08:24 PM (zOTsN)
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 08:25 PM (zOTsN)
Posted by: rickl at October 15, 2015 08:27 PM (sdi6R)
. . . .
Israel is very dependant on foreign investment. Not loans, but
business investment. They are petrified of the BDS movement . . . .
I love your solution of removing all arabs from Israel. I think it
is the only workable solution. However, no matter how much you or I
like it, the rest of the world would destroy Israel's economy for it
and I am still not clear. Are you for or against the settlements and the settlers?
Posted by: ThunderB at October 15, 2015 08:19 PM (zOTsN)
I'm glad I've cleared some things up, ThunderB. First, I am strongly for the settlements. All of Eretz Israeli is Jewish Land. Second, regarding foreign investment and so forth, I see why you believe this is a main cause of elite behavior. The thing is, by allowing this problem to fester for decades while playing domestic political games, the whole BDS movement has been allowed to develop. Machiavelli tells us that if one is doing something unpleasant, do it quickly. If it must be done in stages, do it in rapid stages that will cause the Fakestinians to "self-deport." At least some of Israel's trade partners would not care one bit what Israel did with the Muslims. Oh, they might posture, briefly. I mean really: China? Russia? India?Yes, there will be screams. But I really do think the result is achievable.Finally, I maintain that elites really don't want a very Jewish Israel. That's why the Temple Mount is run the Muslims, and it's why the elites, whichever are in the ascendant at any given time, try to give that land away. They can scream about "US pressure" and "BDS," but I strongly believe that this concern is mainly a red herring.
Posted by: skzion at October 15, 2015 08:35 PM (ujzBf)
Posted by: grammie winger, Isa al-Masih for muslims too at October 15, 2015 08:21 PM (dFi94)"It already has in terms of Bethlehem, which has been controlled by the Palestinians Authority under Oslo. It used to be that Bethlehem was mainly a Christian town. After Oslo most Christians have fled (with reason). Some Christian tourists making a once-in-a-lifetime trip to Israel still go there, of course.Some of the most important Biblical sites are in such dangerous areas that tourism there is way down. But yes, tourism would go down much more, especially if any of Jerusalem were controlled by Muslims.
Posted by: skzion at October 15, 2015 08:42 PM (ujzBf)
Posted by: x at October 15, 2015 08:44 PM (57fhp)
Posted by: DFCtomm at October 16, 2015 04:08 AM (3sqYu)
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Real Clear Politics
Gallup
Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement
Integrity SAT's: Entrance Exam for Paul Anka's Band
AllahPundit's Paul Anka 45's Collection
AnkaPundit: Paul Anka Takes Over the Site for a Weekend (Continues through to Monday's postings)
George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an F*ckin' Hammer
Democratic Forays into Erotica
New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network
Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really Hate Potatoes
Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse
Signs You're at an Iraqi "Wedding Party"
Signs Your Clown Has Gone Bad
Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up
Signs of Hip-Hop Influence on John Kerry
NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom
Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?"
Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind
All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd
Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran
Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore
Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery
Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile
Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance
Collective Names for Groups of People
John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets
Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle
Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy
Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive"
Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments
John Edwards Campaign Excuses
John Kerry Pick-Up Lines
Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney
Torments in Dog-Hell
The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)