Robert Bork On The Martini [CBD]

[A letter he wrote to The Wall Street Journal in response to this.]

Martini's Founding Fathers: Original Intent Debatable
Eric Felten's essay on the dry martini is itself near-perfect (Don't Forget the Vermouth -- WSJ Leisure & Arts, Pursuits, Dec. 10). His allusion to constitutional jurisprudence is faulty, however, since neither in law nor martinis can we know the subjective "original intent" of the Founding Fathers. As to martinis, the intent may have been to ease man's passage through this vale of tears or, less admirably, to employ the tactic of "candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker."
What counts in mixology is the "original understanding" of the martini's essence by those who first consumed it. The essence remains unaltered but allows proportions to evolve as circumstances change. Mr. Felten's "near-perfect martini" is the same in principle as the "original-understanding martini" and therefore its legitimate descendant. Such latter-day travesties as the chocolate martini and the raspberry martini, on the other hand, are the work of activist bartenders.
Mr. Felten lapses into heresy only once. He prefers the olive to the lemon peel because the former is a "snack." Dropping a snack into a classic drink is like garnishing filet mignon with ketchup. The correct response when offered an olive is, "When I want a salad, I'll ask for it."
Robert H. Bork
The Hudson Institute
Washington

And...Open Drinking Thread (and use coasters!)

Posted by: Open Blogger at 08:25 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Hehehe...

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 08:23 PM (3kBFI)

2 Trans power!!!

Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at August 29, 2015 08:24 PM (P6Jv8)

3 shit

Posted by: Caitlyn Jenner at August 29, 2015 08:24 PM (P6Jv8)

4

You just pushed down a nood.

Ban yourself.

Posted by: Soothsayer, now with a low profile tip and ergonomical handle at August 29, 2015 08:24 PM (beqZz)

5 Shit, got a thunderstorm rolling in.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 08:25 PM (3kBFI)

6 The Swedish Chef

Posted by: Positive Waves at August 29, 2015 08:25 PM (MQEz6)

7 After last night's Manhattan-fest, I've moved onto something lighter.

Barefoot Refresh Crisp White...nice, light, dry and slightly bubbly. A nice summer evening drink.

Posted by: DangerGirl and her 1.21 gigawatt Hardline Sanity Prod at August 29, 2015 08:27 PM (q20+R)

8 Now that is true wit and erudition

Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 08:28 PM (JgpFm)

9 The correct response when offered an olive is, "When I want a salad, I'll ask for it."

That's what I say to lettuce and tomato on a hamburger.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at August 29, 2015 08:30 PM (W5DcG)

10 TRUMP!!!!

Posted by: ass at August 29, 2015 08:30 PM (M2xHI)

11 If he'd written more legal opinions like this, he might have won over Ted Kennedy.

Posted by: Pappy O'Daniel at August 29, 2015 08:31 PM (oVJmc)

12 Bulleitt Bourbon. Neat.

Posted by: tonight i'll have... at August 29, 2015 08:33 PM (ATbST)

13 I've only had a couple martinis my entire life. My favorite part was the olive. Might as well get a good gin and swig it from the bottle. That's the way I do most of my drinking anyway.

Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 08:33 PM (0qASP)

14 I stay away from martinis anymore. You can get really stupid drunk on those!

Yeah, unlike the quantities of red wine I've been consuming lately.

Posted by: Farmer at August 29, 2015 08:33 PM (o/90i)

15 I put cool whip on my fillay minyawn.

Posted by: Sheila Jackson-Lee at August 29, 2015 08:34 PM (P6Jv8)

16 I call it The Abomination:

Death's Door gin
Luxardo cherries
Diet Mountain Dew

It's what I had in the fridge.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta at August 29, 2015 08:34 PM (jR7Wy)

17 Guess I will not be invited to Y-not's new digs.

Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 08:36 PM (0qASP)

18 Vermouth is just nasty. It's clearly from a part of the world where they eat offal and claim it's ambrosia.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at August 29, 2015 08:38 PM (rwI+c)

19 I remember someone talking about Bork at a party 'dropping bon mots like the ash off his cigarette.'

Posted by: Grump928(C) at August 29, 2015 08:39 PM (rwI+c)

20 Oh, and for filet mingon, use BOTH the Heinz 57 AND A-1. The ketchup is for the fries.

Posted by: tonight i'll have... at August 29, 2015 08:40 PM (ATbST)

21 Tenni *hic* tennis, anyone *hic*?
Lick her is *hic* quicker.

Posted by: Martini Navratilova at August 29, 2015 08:41 PM (P6Jv8)

22 Redbull and vodka...the founding fathers would have approved. By the way, I have inadvertently purchased Mexican cornbread from the deli at Food City. Does this qualify me for in state tuition?

Posted by: Thurston Howell Trump at August 29, 2015 08:43 PM (R4vR0)

23 Dog hates thunder and lightning. Can't keep him outta my lap.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 08:44 PM (3kBFI)

24 I went to a friends house and he had me try a bit of Old Toms Gin. I liked the flavor on it's own.

Posted by: Bruce at August 29, 2015 08:45 PM (8ikIW)

25 Any martini that uses vodka instead of gin is not a real martini.

Posted by: logprof, now hawking on Amazon Kindle at August 29, 2015 08:46 PM (vsbNu)

26 Can't keep him outta my lap.
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 08:44 PM (3kBFI)

Hope it's not a great dane.

Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 08:46 PM (0qASP)

27 Hell on Wheels Season 5 finale coming up on AMC.

Posted by: logprof, now hawking on Amazon Kindle at August 29, 2015 08:46 PM (vsbNu)

28 Oh, and it's rum and diet coke for me. Shall switch to iced tea w/vodka shortly.

Posted by: logprof, now hawking on Amazon Kindle at August 29, 2015 08:47 PM (vsbNu)

29 I'm going to watch Dr. Pol tonight. Vet extraordinaire he is.

Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 08:48 PM (0qASP)

30 Sweet tea and Capt 100.

The usual.

Posted by: SMFH at it all at August 29, 2015 08:48 PM (zyIlW)

31 > now hawking on Amazon Kindle

Eew. Snot-gurgles, then hawks all over it!

Posted by: tonight i'll have... at August 29, 2015 08:48 PM (ATbST)

32 Took Mrs. E and Auntie to Posado's for early supper. Had a house margarita. Got home and puttered about for a couple hours, then had a Seagram's and Perrier. Don't laugh. Perfect for after mexican supper. Especially when taken with a zantac.

Posted by: Eromero at August 29, 2015 08:50 PM (go5uR)

33 Liquor!

I hardly even know her!

Posted by: Michael Scott at August 29, 2015 08:50 PM (vsbNu)

34 "Hope it's not a great dane. "

Heh, nah, he's a little sonny gun. But all knees and elbows.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 08:50 PM (3kBFI)

35 This is the truth:

https://twitter.com/SciFiJunkies/status/637408362917949440

Posted by: goon at August 29, 2015 08:51 PM (gy5kE)

36 "Posado's"

Just my favoritest ever Mexican place! Hope ya'll enjoyed.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 08:51 PM (3kBFI)

37 Tanqueray 10 with an onion. Sure it's a Gibson, but damn it's good. Or just chug out of the bottle.

Posted by: Tutu at August 29, 2015 08:53 PM (eew/b)

38 Red wine, brandy, or s scotch I'll be over.

Posted by: Skip at August 29, 2015 08:53 PM (nSbUf)

39 I just farted.

Posted by: Joey B. at August 29, 2015 08:54 PM (vsbNu)

40 All Hail Eris, Abomination? More like Death Wish.

Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 08:54 PM (JgpFm)

41 Is opening the HQ causing Firefox to crash for anyone else? I had to come in using Exploder.

Posted by: Country Singer at August 29, 2015 08:54 PM (nL0sw)

42 After 6 hours of yard work and garage cleaning, anything sounds good. Wife handed me a glass of red wine when I ended my labors, so that's what I'm drinking.

Posted by: PabloD at August 29, 2015 08:55 PM (3RNW8)

43 40 All Hail Eris, Abomination? More like Death Wish.
Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 08:54 PM (JgpFm)
---
Don't judge me! You deal with the booze situation as it is, not how you'd like it to be.

And it's actually quite tasty.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta at August 29, 2015 08:57 PM (jR7Wy)

44 I used to drink the Merlot, but it turned my tongue red and my dentist thought I was dying. I switched to Chardonnay.

Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 08:58 PM (0qASP)

45 "Don't judge me! You deal with the booze situation as it is, not how you'd like it to be. "

Wisdom. Drink it in.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 08:58 PM (3kBFI)

46 *serves All Hail Eris some Romulan Ale*

Vodka with Blue Ne-hi.

Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:00 PM (JgpFm)

47 "I switched to Chardonnay."

I like the chardonnay. Don't drink regular but ever so often I pick up a bottle.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:00 PM (3kBFI)

48 The Manhattan:

Martini for Men.

You even get the cherry.

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:00 PM (JvPqF)

49 Rivvid!!!!

*hic*

Posted by: John Boehner at August 29, 2015 09:01 PM (oZr5y)

50 I see CNN has something on about that famous Social Justice Warrior of the 70s and a man of the Left, Jim Jones.

Posted by: Puddleglum at August 29, 2015 09:02 PM (NGd+i)

51 Is an Open Drinking Thread the same thing as an open bar?

Posted by: logprof, now selling on Amazon at August 29, 2015 09:02 PM (vsbNu)

52 "Is opening the HQ causing Firefox to crash for anyone else? I had to come in using Exploder."

Using Pale Moon, the Firefox-derived variant that doesn't help fill the coffers of the lunatic lefty SJWs at the Mozilla Foundation. No problems to speak of in loading the HQ.

Posted by: torquewrench at August 29, 2015 09:03 PM (noWW6)

53 I used to drink the Merlot, but it turned my tongue red and my dentist thought I was dying. I switched to Chardonnay.
Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 08:58 PM (0qASP)

Red tongue at night, tomorrow's a fright.

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:03 PM (JvPqF)

54 That original article is a keeper, and he's right about the Bombay, but the Sapphire is better than he says. Can't get everything right all of the time, as Mr. Bork establishes via the olive error.

Posted by: goon at August 29, 2015 09:03 PM (gy5kE)

55 I find the offer of filet mignon to be a slap in the face. You have to grind it up yourself to make sloppy joe's! That's kind of like buying dirty clothes.

Posted by: t-bird at August 29, 2015 09:03 PM (FcR7P)

56 Gin martini, extra dry.

How dry?

Is the vermouth in the same room?

Whoaaaa! That's close enough!

Posted by: Sixkiller at August 29, 2015 09:04 PM (hRytD)

57 If I was at home, I'd be drinking my favorite merlot, Yuengling Amber Lager. :-)

Posted by: Puddleglum at August 29, 2015 09:04 PM (NGd+i)

58 "Is an Open Drinking Thread the same thing as an open bar?"

Don't cost nothing.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:04 PM (3kBFI)

59 Filbert: dang, now a Maker's Manhattan sounds good. And a cigar. The cigar will relegate me to the aforementioned clean garage...

Posted by: PabloD at August 29, 2015 09:05 PM (3RNW8)

60 I've only had a couple martinis my entire life. My favorite part was the olive. Might as well get a good gin and swig it from the bottle. That's the way I do most of my drinking anyway.
Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 08:33 PM (0qASP)

The perfect martini:

1: Really, really, really GOOD gin,
2: Three or four big olives (with pimentos, that's traditional)

Eat the olives. Drink the gin. Repeat as necessary.

Vermouth is for beginners.

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:05 PM (JvPqF)

61 [/]Red tongue at night, tomorrow's a fright.
Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:03 PM (JvPqF)

I'm guessing that is a take off of some sea story. I'm not well read.

Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 09:05 PM (0qASP)

62 Redbull and vodka...the founding fathers would have approved.
Posted by: Thurston Howell Trump at August 29, 2015 08:43 PM (R4vR0)

Thomas Paine would have drunk vodka and redbull.

Just my musings:
Ben Franklin-- Weed
Alexander Hamilton-- Bacardi 151

Posted by: Secundus at August 29, 2015 09:06 PM (Efu7U)

63 Gin martini, extra dry.

How dry?

Is the vermouth in the same room?

Whoaaaa! That's close enough!

Posted by: Sixkiller at August 29, 2015 09:04 PM (hRytD)

That's not a martini. That's gin in a glass.

Posted by: DangerGirl and her 1.21 gigawatt Hardline Sanity Prod at August 29, 2015 09:06 PM (q20+R)

64 He is totally wrong about olives (dirty martinis are the best) but his advice is sound otherwise.

Posted by: Evi L. Bloggerlady at August 29, 2015 09:06 PM (zzpgI)

65 RK - we had a sprinkle here earlier in the evening...would dearly love a full-blown rainstorm.

Posted by: Sixkiller at August 29, 2015 09:06 PM (hRytD)

66 Thomas Jefferson-- Johnny Walker Blue

Posted by: Secundus at August 29, 2015 09:06 PM (Efu7U)

67
With just enough vermouth to coat the ice cubes, drain, discard ice and add gin. Prepare for a morning full of pine needles.

Posted by: GBruno at August 29, 2015 09:07 PM (u49WF)

68 Red tongue at night, tomorrow's a fright.>>>

Red tongue in morning Sailors take warning.

Posted by: Willy J at August 29, 2015 09:07 PM (nAv2M)

69 That's not a martini. That's gin in a glass.

Posted by: DangerGirl and her 1.21 gigawatt Hardline Sanity Prod at August 29, 2015 09:06 PM (q20+R)

But it's a chilled glass.

Posted by: Sixkiller at August 29, 2015 09:07 PM (hRytD)

70 I was very fond of vodka gimlets at one time in the far past, but never got into martinis. Although my bro would bring back bottles of Tanqueray in his duty free bag whilst on missions in the Air Force that took him to England. Damn smooth stuff!

Southern Comfort Manhattans are more to my taste if I am getting a mixed drink.

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at August 29, 2015 09:07 PM (UpGcq)

71 Never mind, I found the issue. Had a screwed up extension running. Disabled it and now everything's fine.

Posted by: Country Singer at August 29, 2015 09:07 PM (nL0sw)

72 59 Filbert: dang, now a Maker's Manhattan sounds good. And a cigar. The cigar will relegate me to the aforementioned clean garage...
Posted by: PabloD at August 29, 2015 09:05 PM (3RNW

----
I have all these components, less the garage.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta at August 29, 2015 09:08 PM (jR7Wy)

73 Thomas Paine would have drunk vodka and redbull.

Just my musings:
Ben Franklin-- Weed
Alexander Hamilton-- Bacardi 151
Posted by: Secundus at August 29, 2015 09:06 PM (Efu7U)

I made Martha Washington's Rum Punch for my family's Independence Day get-together, it went over a treat.

I can easily see Ben Franklin getting happy on a few mugs of this bad boy:

4 oz. Simple Syrup
4 oz. Lemon Juice
4 oz. Fresh Orange Juice
3 oz. White Rum
3 oz. Dark Rum
3 oz. Orange Curacao
3 Lemons quartered
1 Orange quartered
� Tsp. Grated nutmeg
3 Cinnamon sticks (broken)
6 Cloves
12 oz. Boiling water

(some assembly required)

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:08 PM (JvPqF)

74
And to think Biden helped immensely in taking down Bork.

Posted by: GBruno at August 29, 2015 09:08 PM (u49WF)

75 Samuel Adams-- Tequila, maybe

Posted by: Secundus at August 29, 2015 09:08 PM (Efu7U)

76 Why drink gin when Pine-Sol is cheaper?

Posted by: PabloD at August 29, 2015 09:08 PM (3RNW8)

77 Aargh. Black Diamond in above recipe is a 1/2.

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:08 PM (JvPqF)

78 I was served a Manhattan at a swank eatery, and it was delish, but the cherry was stemless. This seems...wrong.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta at August 29, 2015 09:08 PM (jR7Wy)

79 Okay, this made me chuckle... from the 1911 Encyclopedia Britannica on Egypt.
---
The Egyptian Army.

The fellah soldier has been aptly likened to a bicycle, which
although incapable of standing up alone, is very useful while
under the control of a skilful master.

Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:09 PM (JgpFm)

80 We're 'seasonal drinkers' here: gin tonic during the summer months; switch to bourbon and/or scotch during what passes for winter here.

Posted by: Sixkiller at August 29, 2015 09:09 PM (hRytD)

81 Why drink gin when Pine-Sol is cheaper?

Posted by: PabloD at August 29, 2015 09:08 PM (3RNW

Listerine. Drunken AND a refreshing mint flavor!

Posted by: Secundus at August 29, 2015 09:10 PM (Efu7U)

82 "would dearly love a full-blown rainstorm."

Where at, six?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:10 PM (3kBFI)

83 Why drink gin when Pine-Sol is cheaper?
Posted by: PabloD at August 29, 2015 09:08 PM (3RNW

Because Pine-Sol can be used as a cleaner.

Gin has no function except as an inebriant.

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:11 PM (JvPqF)

84 I almost embarreled myself. Not good.

Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 09:11 PM (0qASP)

85 78 I was served a Manhattan at a swank eatery, and it was delish, but the cherry was stemless. This seems...wrong.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta at August 29, 2015

Fruit in a drink is wrong. Use a fork to stab that bastard the next time

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at August 29, 2015 09:12 PM (OMXTD)

86 I almost embarreled myself. Not good.
Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 09:11 PM (0qASP)

I hear with the "new tone" of the blog, the renovated the Barrel and put a brand new coat of scum on the inside.

I'm not eager to discover whether or not this is true.

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:13 PM (JvPqF)

87 Sitting here watching "The Hustler." God, I love a good pool game.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:13 PM (3kBFI)

88 Meet the new scum, same as the old scum; they're Democrats.

Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:13 PM (JgpFm)

89 I like my martinis filthy dirty with three olives and just a whisper of vermouth. Otherwise it's just a swig of gin.

I'm Baroque, not Classical. The more gilt and cherubs, the better.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta at August 29, 2015 09:13 PM (jR7Wy)

90 Has someone already mentioned the passage of Wrangler Jane?

Melody Patterson, RIP

http://tinyurl.com/oxbng6y

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at August 29, 2015 09:14 PM (VPLuQ)

91
69 That's not a martini. That's gin in a glass.

Posted by: DangerGirl and her 1.21 gigawatt Hardline Sanity Prod at August 29, 2015 09:06 PM (q20+R)

But it's a chilled glass.
Posted by: Sixkiller at August 29, 2015

Shaken not stirred

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at August 29, 2015 09:14 PM (OMXTD)

92 Just my musings:
Ben Franklin-- Weed
Posted by: Secundus at August 29, 2015 09:06 PM (Efu7U)

Little known fact, Ben was the inventor of the bong. And the first reggae bass line.

Posted by: East Bay Jay at August 29, 2015 09:15 PM (7v8o1)

93 Where at, six?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:10 PM (3kBFI)

Gatesville/Hamilton area.

Posted by: Sixkiller at August 29, 2015 09:16 PM (hRytD)

94 Benjamin Franklin: The first President of the United States (who was never President of the United States)

- ht Firesign Theatre

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:17 PM (JvPqF)

95 Didn't Washington have a substantial hemp crop on his plantation?

We need to incorporate hemp fibers into the one dollar bill.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta at August 29, 2015 09:17 PM (jR7Wy)

96 Loved that Churchill's face to face with FDR included martini's. Churchill commented that he couldn't understand how anyone could drink something so vile, and the brandy at the White House was sub par also.

Posted by: Ben Had at August 29, 2015 09:17 PM (iGw6m)

97 Oh hey, drinking thread.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ygASzZHyCE8

Posted by: HR trinken trinken trinken at August 29, 2015 09:18 PM (rHXGG)

98 This Bork martini thing is old, too bad it did not come out during his nomination, he might have made it.

Posted by: Evi L. Bloggerlady at August 29, 2015 09:18 PM (zzpgI)

99 I keep some Gin around just to save on those little wipes that I use for my reading glasses. Gin is way better at cleaning and the packaging is more convenient.

Posted by: goon at August 29, 2015 09:18 PM (gy5kE)

100 Pretentious wax coating that bloodies your fingers makes Maker's Mark undrinkable.

Posted by: Tutu at August 29, 2015 09:19 PM (eew/b)

101 Posted by: goon at August 29, 2015 09:18 PM (gy5kE)
---
"Gin spectacles" sounds much classier than "beer goggles".

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta at August 29, 2015 09:19 PM (jR7Wy)

102 Sitting here watching "The Hustler." God, I love a good pool game. Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:13 PM (3kBFI)

I love pool. They used to televise championships on TV. I played at one time. Never great, but could hold my own.

Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 09:19 PM (0qASP)

103 100 Pretentious wax coating that bloodies your fingers makes Maker's Mark undrinkable.
Posted by: Tutu at August 29, 2015 09:19 PM (eew/b)
---
That's why my manservant wears kid gloves.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta at August 29, 2015 09:20 PM (jR7Wy)

104 I need gin and a shot of heroin

Packers are falling like flies vs. Eagles

Cobb gone now we already lost Jordy Nelso

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at August 29, 2015 09:20 PM (OMXTD)

105 "I love pool. They used to televise championships on TV. I played at one time. Never great, but could hold my own. "

No shit. I remember watching pool on TV as a kid. ABC I think.

We ever meet up, we'll have to play us some pool.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:21 PM (3kBFI)

106 Your dog-robber wears gloves made from children???

Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:21 PM (JgpFm)

107 Whatever it is, it can't be called bourbon unless it comes from Kentucky

Posted by: The Hon. Mitch (The Turtle) McConnel, Whig, Kentucky at August 29, 2015 09:22 PM (oca9z)

108 98 This Bork martini thing is old, too bad it did not come out during his nomination, he might have made it.
Posted by: Evi L. Bloggerlady at August

Anti-freeze & tonic for Arlen Spector
Rot in hell

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at August 29, 2015 09:22 PM (OMXTD)

109 Cobb gone now we already lost Jordy Nelson

So you're saying I'm not going to be wearing a cheesehead to a sports bar in the middle of the night come February?

Posted by: HR trinken trinken trinken at August 29, 2015 09:22 PM (rHXGG)

110 "Packers are falling like flies vs. Eagles "

Pretty sure the Eagles are gonna suck this year, MH. GB doing the rehearsal starter thing?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:22 PM (3kBFI)

111 " I think I'll call it a Vesper"

Posted by: Ben Had at August 29, 2015 09:23 PM (iGw6m)

112 Some cocktails are interesting, even refreshing, such as a Sazerac. But none of them beat slow sipping of Wild Turkey Rare Breed, George Dickel number 12, or Lagavulin 16, neat.

Feel free to replace my choices with whatever you mistakenly believe is better.

(Ducks away from a hail of empty bottles.)

Posted by: JTB at August 29, 2015 09:23 PM (FvdPb)

113 "Gatesville/Hamilton area."

Ahhhh.....

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:24 PM (3kBFI)

114 Ah, found it. Appropriate picture for this thread.

http://www.ufunk.net/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/selection-du-weekend-155-69.jpg

Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:25 PM (JgpFm)

115 We ever meet up, we'll have to play us some pool.
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:21 PM (3kBFI)

Sounds great. You would eat me alive. Old, bifocals and dementia does not make a good pool player.

Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 09:26 PM (0qASP)

116 Appropriate picture for this thread.

Seems so.

Posted by: HR trinken trinken trinken at August 29, 2015 09:26 PM (rHXGG)

117 "http://www.ufunk.net/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/selection-du-weekend-155-69.jpg"

Rooftop Koreans......with a liquor store.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:27 PM (3kBFI)

118 Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:09 PM (JgpFm)

Pre-PC literature is always a pleasure to read!

Posted by: Hrothgar at August 29, 2015 09:27 PM (ftVQq)

119 Alexander Hamilton-- Bacardi 151
Posted by: Secundus at August 29, 2015 09:06 PM (Efu7U)
......
That could explain his aim!

Posted by: Thurston Howell Trump at August 29, 2015 09:27 PM (R4vR0)

120 Heather you can always wear a cheesehead in Packer territory

Riccardo. Packer defense is dress rehearsal.
Offense isn't started lots of 2nd stringers

32-14 at the moment

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at August 29, 2015 09:30 PM (OMXTD)

121 "Sounds great. You would eat me alive. "

Oh, I don't know. Half the fun is seeing just how bad a day you're having. After a few beers I think I'm pretty good.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:30 PM (3kBFI)

122 94 Benjamin Franklin: The first President of the United States (who was never President of the United States)

- ht Firesign Theatre
Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:17 PM (JvPqF)

--From The Office:

Michael Scott: Did you know that Ben Franklin was one of our horniest presidents?

Benjamin Franklin re-enactor: Ha ha, but *I* was never President!

Michael Scott [whispering]: Yes, you weren't, but the *real* Benjamin Franklin was.

Posted by: logprof, now selling on Amazon at August 29, 2015 09:31 PM (vsbNu)

123 This thread leaves me shaken but not stirred.

Posted by: Dave, exiled in RI at August 29, 2015 09:33 PM (sTarx)

124 loggy, pardon my ignorance, what do you sell on Amazon?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:33 PM (3kBFI)

125 - ht Firesign Theatre

Posted by: filbert

Our forefathers took drugs

Dogs flew spaceships

That's right.

Everything You Know is Wrong

Posted by: Bossy Conservative...a rube in America at August 29, 2015 09:33 PM (+1T7c)

126 123 This thread leaves me shaken but not stirred.
Posted by: Dave, exiled in RI at August 29, 2015 09:33 PM (sTarx)
...... lol, as many do!

Posted by: Thurston Howell Trump at August 29, 2015 09:33 PM (R4vR0)

127 Well, I'm going to watch the Donkeys get beat in a preseason game. I don't think Manning is going to play much this year.

Posted by: Ronster at August 29, 2015 09:34 PM (0qASP)

128 "Gin spectacles" sounds much classier than "beer goggles".
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta

A "gin monocle" would be uptown.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at August 29, 2015 09:34 PM (W5DcG)

129 Is opening the HQ causing Firefox to crash for anyone else? I had to come in using Exploder.
Posted by: Country Singer at August 29, 2015 08:54 PM

No, but it won't load beyond a certain point for me. The comment function is only working in Explorer and Safari. Is anyone else having that problem?

Oh...and finished with martinis and G&Ts. Moved on to a nice local dark rum. *raises glass to the Horde*

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at August 29, 2015 09:34 PM (KrAjA)

130 Vermouth matters. Dolin is good, but I recently discovered Carpano Dry, and whoa it is great!

Say, after reading the wise words of Robert Bork, now I want a Martini. Is having one after red wine a recipe for trouble? Probably. Well, it's Saturday. Bring on the trouble!

Posted by: Splunge at August 29, 2015 09:34 PM (iMxBJ)

131 The older I have gotten, I find myself not using the mixers anymore. I"ll call this my Vic syndrome. Straight with the stray ice cube or twist.

Posted by: Ben Had at August 29, 2015 09:34 PM (iGw6m)

132 127,

Works for us.

Posted by: Raider Nation at August 29, 2015 09:35 PM (zyIlW)

133 Everything You Know is Wrong
Posted by: Bossy Conservative...a rube in America at August 29, 2015 09:33 PM (+1T7c)

Tru dat.

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:36 PM (JvPqF)

134 Ah, found it. Appropriate picture for this thread.

http://www.ufunk.net/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/selection-du-weekend-155-69.jpg
Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:25 PM

Damn straight. *drinks*

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at August 29, 2015 09:36 PM (KrAjA)

135 I'm more an Old Fashioned man. Used to love Manhattans until one night when I drank far too many (at home, luckily), and regretted it the next morning.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at August 29, 2015 09:37 PM (fOBju)

136 124 loggy, pardon my ignorance, what do you sell on Amazon?
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:33 PM (3kBFI)

--A 20+ year old novella. More on it in the Book Thread tomorrow, but here's the linky that allows Ace to get his cut:

http://astore.amazon.com/aoshq-20/detail/B014EKK5CO

Posted by: logprof, now selling on Amazon at August 29, 2015 09:37 PM (vsbNu)

137 Was at the *adult candy store* earlier today-- saw Cucumber flavored vodka. Organic! All natural! From San Francisco!

Yeesh...

Posted by: JeanQ Flyover at August 29, 2015 09:39 PM (rhjQp)

138 Cucumber flavored vodka.

That just sounds gross.

Posted by: SMFH at it all at August 29, 2015 09:40 PM (zyIlW)

139 Hrothgar, you mean like this lovely snippet?

The efforts of 48 American officers, who under Gen. C. P. Stone
zealously served Ismail, had entirely failed to overcome Egyptian
venality and intrigue; and in spite of the military schools, with
a comprehensive syllabus, the only perceptible difference between
the Egyptian officer and private in 1879 consisted, according
to one of the Americans, in the fact that the first was the product
of the harem, and the second of the field.

Sound familiar to modern ears?

Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:40 PM (JgpFm)

140 Yeah, I expect the donkeys and raiders to be at the bottom this year again. I would really like to see the Raiders stomp the living shit out of the donkeys at least once this year.

Posted by: Infidel at August 29, 2015 09:40 PM (PfVjp)

141 Was at the *adult candy store* earlier today-- saw Cucumber flavored vodka. Organic! All natural! From San Francisco!

--

Since it's from SF, is cucumber a euphemism?

Posted by: @votermom at August 29, 2015 09:40 PM (cbfNE)

142 A gin monocle?

Would that be a ginocle?

Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:41 PM (JgpFm)

143 So would I, Infidel.

Very much so.

Posted by: SMFH at it all at August 29, 2015 09:41 PM (zyIlW)

144 saw Cucumber flavored vodka. Organic! All natural! From San Francisco!

Of course it was from San Francisco.

I tried a cucumber kolsch-style* beer earlier this summer from a local brewery that I used to respect...oh, Bast, so bad.

* Gotta be brewed in Koln to be Kolsch. /nerd

Posted by: HR trinken trinken trinken at August 29, 2015 09:41 PM (rHXGG)

145 140
Yeah, I expect the donkeys and raiders to be at the bottom this year
again. I would really like to see the Raiders stomp the living shit out
of the donkeys at least once this year.

Posted by: Infidel at August 29, 2015 09:40 PM (PfVjp)

So would I.

Posted by: Zombie Snake Stabler at August 29, 2015 09:42 PM (hRytD)

146 Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:40 PM (JgpFm)

Spot on!

Posted by: Hrothgar at August 29, 2015 09:42 PM (ftVQq)

147 I really don't care for cucumbers, anyway. Pickles are okay, but vodka?! Pass.

Posted by: JeanQ Flyover at August 29, 2015 09:42 PM (rhjQp)

148 Was at the *adult candy store* earlier today-- saw Cucumber flavored vodka. Organic! All natural! From San Francisco!

Yeesh...
Posted by: JeanQ Flyover at August 29, 2015 09:39 PM (rhjQp)

Flavored vodka is an abomination unto Dog . . .

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:44 PM (JvPqF)

149 The Hobbit is on tv.
After numerous viewings of LOTR & the Hobbit, I've come to realize that I don't really like Gandalf.

Posted by: @votermom at August 29, 2015 09:44 PM (cbfNE)

150 "Flavored vodka is an abomination unto Dog . . ."

Gragree. See the "whipped cream" vodka at the store and gag.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:46 PM (3kBFI)

151 The clerk and I wondered if cucumber vodka *might* be useful in a salad-drink like bloody mary or caesar.

Posted by: JeanQ Flyover at August 29, 2015 09:47 PM (rhjQp)

152 Flavored vodka is an abomination unto Dog . . .
Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:44 PM

Preach it, brother! Vodka. Ice cold. Neat.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at August 29, 2015 09:47 PM (KrAjA)

153 I don't like the Hobbits either. Back to the Shire with them.

Posted by: Sixkiller at August 29, 2015 09:47 PM (hRytD)

154 I always have trouble finding Krischwasser for my fondue. One of the few drawbacks of living in a fairly rural area.

Posted by: Infidel at August 29, 2015 09:47 PM (PfVjp)

155 144 I tried a cucumber kolsch-style* beer earlier this summer from a local brewery that I used to respect...oh, Bast, so bad.

* Gotta be brewed in Koln to be Kolsch. /nerd

You could make a reasonable Kolsch style, in theory. Never seen it done right, though. Probably one of the hardest styles in the world to get just so. Putting cucumbers in it is an admission that you can't make that, so you're making something else. Something horrible.

Posted by: Splunge at August 29, 2015 09:48 PM (iMxBJ)

156 Oh, rats. Still a bit more daylight and hubby wants help with a big branch in the yard.

bbl.

Posted by: JeanQ Flyover at August 29, 2015 09:48 PM (rhjQp)

157 Wish they had martinis here. All I get is squashed-grape pruno from my cellmate Bubba. That and 'salad'

Posted by: ray nagin at August 29, 2015 09:49 PM (AVEe1)

158 may I say, while watching Kix Brooks steakhouses of the country program, that I just saw a commercial for Kaboom bathroom cleaner. It lacked the clown faces, though, and I wish I had a steak.

Posted by: mallfly at August 29, 2015 09:50 PM (vcI3n)

159 148 Flavored vodka is an abomination unto Dog . . .
Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:44 PM (JvPqF)

Usually, yes. But taste through the whole Hangar One line, and St George's green chile vodka, before you render final judgement. Heck, gin is pretty much flavored vodka, isn't it? Absinthe, too.

Posted by: Splunge at August 29, 2015 09:50 PM (iMxBJ)

160 Robert Bork, renaissance man. What a terrible thing was done to him. It exemplified illiberalness. "Liberals" have destroyed both liberalness and the word itself.

Posted by: rrpjr at August 29, 2015 09:50 PM (s/yC1)

161 153 I don't like the Hobbits either. Back to the Shire with them.

--

How can you not like Pippin? Everyone loves Pippin.

Posted by: @votermom at August 29, 2015 09:50 PM (cbfNE)

162 BLM said I should only talk to white people abot the martini problem.

So I discussed it with Shaun King.

Posted by: Hillary Clinton at August 29, 2015 09:51 PM (P6Jv8)

163 If I have made you hate Gandalf, and hate Hobbits, then I have accomplished everything I set out to do.

Posted by: Peter Jackson at August 29, 2015 09:51 PM (iMxBJ)

164 That and 'salad'

Posted by: ray nagin

Tossed I hope.

Posted by: Infidel at August 29, 2015 09:53 PM (PfVjp)

165 128 "Gin spectacles" sounds much classier than "beer goggles".
Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta

A "gin monocle" would be uptown.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at August 29, 2015 09:34 PM (W5DcG)
---
That's when you go to bed with Eustace Tilley and wake up with Charlie McCarthy.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta at August 29, 2015 09:53 PM (jR7Wy)

166
Now that was being 'Borked'.
RIP Robert.

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 29, 2015 09:54 PM (9mTYi)

167 Ben Franklin was a horndog. Also on my favorite money.

Adams was the real first president.

Posted by: eleven at August 29, 2015 09:54 PM (MDgS8)

168 Drudge had a link today about Oprah starring in a forthcoming Richard Pryor "biopic."

I involuntarily pictured Oprah, her hair tamed down, with a bushy mustache, running down the road, her ether-saturated hair on fire, from cooking freebase.

Posted by: Splunge at August 29, 2015 09:54 PM (iMxBJ)

169 Well, I don't hate Gandslf, I just think he's a PITA.
He always sends people hither and yonder promising to meet up then he doesn't show. So unreliable.

Posted by: @votermom at August 29, 2015 09:54 PM (cbfNE)

170
Barbarous assholes, the lot of them

Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at August 29, 2015 09:55 PM (9mTYi)

171 Gandalf is dead?

Posted by: Bossy Conservative...a rube in America at August 29, 2015 09:55 PM (+1T7c)

172 169 Well, I don't hate Gandslf, I just think he's a PITA.
He always sends people hither and yonder promising to meet up then he doesn't show. So unreliable.

What part of "imprisoned by Sauruman" did I fail to make clear at the Council of Elrond?

Posted by: Gandalf at August 29, 2015 09:56 PM (iMxBJ)

173 135 I'm more an Old Fashioned man. Used to love Manhattans until one night when I drank far too many (at home, luckily), and regretted it the next morning.

Posted by: Colorado Alex at August 29, 2015 09:37

Well at one time in my life I regretted everything the following day

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at August 29, 2015 09:56 PM (OMXTD)

174 Preach it, brother! Vodka. Ice cold. Neat.
Posted by: RedMindBlueState at August 29, 2015 09:47 PM (KrAjA)

If ya wanna put shit in vodka, feel free.

Me . . . well, I have some dear friends, we have a tradition, where, the one or two times we get together, we do white russians: two shots vodka, two shots Kahlua, two shots heavy whipping cream.

Other than that, vodka seems to me kind of a waste of time. I mean, it doesn't really have any flavor to speak of. Rum is rummy, whisky is whisky-y, gin is ginny, etc., etc. Vodka is meh.

I get why marketers want to put flavors in vodka in order to sell more units, but come on, people! We've had this thing called a "cocktail" for years now, where you mix a liquor with some flavoring.

Usually the flavoring is a fraction of the price of the liquor.

You want lemon-flavored vodka? Go buy a bottle of lemon juice and season to taste! Plus you've got lemon juice on hand to make smoked salmon dip and all the other yummy things lemon juice goes into.

(Here endeth the rant)

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:56 PM (JvPqF)

175 For me the perfect drink is good bourbon on the rocks, splash of water (volume dependent on the proof).

If I fancy a cocktail, the dry manhattan fits the bill--bourbon without annoying sweetness. The recipe is bourbon, dry vermouth, bitters, and a lemon twist garnish.

Posted by: Hurricane LaFawnduh at August 29, 2015 09:57 PM (laMCB)

176 ONT ya bunch of booze hounds!

Posted by: All Hail Eris, Michigangsta at August 29, 2015 09:57 PM (jR7Wy)

177 Gawd, so love the old encyclopedia... by gosh they try and teach you how to read hieroglyphics.

Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:57 PM (JgpFm)

178 Gandalf is dead?
Posted by: Bossy Conservative...a rube in America at August 29, 2015 09:55 PM (+1T7c)
He got better.

Posted by: filbert at August 29, 2015 09:57 PM (JvPqF)

179 Damn, quite a cliffhanger ending for HoW. Damn, can't wait!

Posted by: logprof, now selling on Amazon at August 29, 2015 09:58 PM (vsbNu)

180 Hey, what are we talking about?

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at August 29, 2015 09:58 PM (3kBFI)

181 How can you not like Pippin? Everyone loves Pippin.

Nope.

Are you old enough to remember Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom?

During the intro to the show I always rooted for that snake to thrash Marlin Perkins in the surf, even though I knew he'd live to say stupid shit another day.

I was probably dropped on my head as a child.

Posted by: Sixkiller at August 29, 2015 09:58 PM (hRytD)

182 filbert,

*golf clap*

Well said.

Posted by: SMFH at it all at August 29, 2015 09:58 PM (zyIlW)

183 When I felch a martini out of Hillary, I call it a cunttail.

Posted by: Huma Abedin at August 29, 2015 09:59 PM (P6Jv8)

184 Yesterday after work, I stopped in the liquor store, to buy, get this, some liquor.

I saw a young woman who was absolutely stunning.

I kept glancing at her, (I could hardly help it), and she noticed and was not amused.

I wanted to say to her, "You are beautiful. No, i'm not trying to hit on you; I'm merely stating a fact", but I think she would have maced me before I got all that out.

Posted by: rickl at August 29, 2015 09:59 PM (sdi6R)

185 Hey, what are we talking about?

I have no idea but apparently there's a new thread.

I'm so done with this one.

Posted by: eleven at August 29, 2015 09:59 PM (MDgS8)

186 Three Olives has "Loopy" vodka, smells like fruit loops. Also "Cake" which smells like frosting. Nasty stuff only kids drink. And a Gibson is garnished with two onions as they represent the breastesses of the famous Gibson Girl.

Posted by: 1894fg at August 29, 2015 10:01 PM (JT2ZF)

187 two shots vodka, two shots Kahlua, two shots heavy whipping cream.

...I have these things in my refrigerator. *lightbulb*

If you like egg nog, try substituting that for the whipping cream next December.

Posted by: HR trinken trinken trinken at August 29, 2015 10:04 PM (rHXGG)

188 Posted by: Anna Puma at August 29, 2015 09:57 PM (JgpFm)

Once upon a time it was reasonable to expect encyclopedia readers to be interested in actually knowing how to do things!

Posted by: Hrothgar at August 29, 2015 10:13 PM (ftVQq)

189 174 --- filbert---

AMEN.
Preach it!

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at August 29, 2015 10:22 PM (cN9Sk)

190 "Give me something tall and cold and full of gin."

"You leave my wife out of this, sir."

--Witty bar banter overheard sometime in my youth

Posted by: Octopus at August 30, 2015 01:39 AM (gnD2y)

191 Big, giant, large Bombay martinis wet aND DIRTY AND SHAKEN TILL YOUR HANDS freeze to the shaker.

3 habanero olives and an oversized martini glass

best drink on the best nights

Posted by: Max Power at August 30, 2015 02:24 AM (QCc6B)

192 "Pretentious wax coating that bloodies your fingers makes Maker's Mark undrinkable."

Try some Woodford Reserve. No annoying red wax, just simply great sippin.

Posted by: Nick Ahragua at August 30, 2015 06:16 AM (YgK53)

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