aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com
CBD:
cbd.aoshq at gee mail.com
Buck:
buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com
joe mannix:
mannix2024 at proton.me
MisHum:
petmorons at gee mail.com
J.J. Sefton:
sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com
Overnight Open Thread (12025-2014) - Christmas Day Edition
Mr Pierce then granted Monis and Droudis bail on the grounds that the case against them was "weak"."Are they a threat to other people? No they are not. If there was a threat it was to this woman who was murdered," Mr Pierce said.
-- Australian Magistrate William Pierce explaining why he he was granting bail to Sydney gunman, Man Monis, last year after he was charged with killing his ex-wife.
These stories about the killings of African-American men by police officers (or by a "neighborhood watch captain," in Trayvon Martin's case) are all what my long-time radio and podcast partner Brian Ward calls "stories of choice." They are plucked from a nearly endless supply of sad events that occur daily in a nation of 315 million, and are promoted because they further a political narrative. An unholy alliance of activists and newspaper reporters and editors tries to distort our perception of reality by giving undue emphasis to them. Then, of course, reality begins to catch up with perception, and we have riots, murders of police officers, and so on. But understand that the decision to promote these stories, in preference to others that are equally or more newsworthy, is a choice that is consciously made by people with a political agenda.
-- Powerline's John Hinderaker
Slate Admits that Kwanzaa is a Made-Up Holiday
Which reminds me that I haven't heard much about Kwanzaa in the last Christmas or two.
Or why do liberals hate Capra's It's Wonderful Life so much?
Vox's Matt Yglesias: Hey Let's Have a Second Christmas in the Spring
Believe it or not this is one of the lesser dumb ideas that the World's Dumbest Smart Man has had this year.
Thugs Win as NY Fire Department Forced to Abandon Station
How North Korea Trains Its Hacker Squads
Mirim University produces most of the hackers that get placed in Bureau 121. It's a highly competitive program, with each class accepting only about 100 students out of 5,000 applicants. They take six 90-minute classes every day, learning different coding languages and operating systems, from C to Linux. Jang says a lot of time was spent dissecting Microsoft programs, like the Windows operating system, and how to attack the overall computer IT systems of enemy countries like the US or South Korea.
But the core principle is to develop its own hacking programs and computer viruses without having to rely on programs already built in the outside world. Jang says he believes North Korean hackers are as good as the top programmers at Google or CIA, if not already better. "Especially in terms of coding, I'm confident they're better because they've invested in it for so long," he says.
China's manufacturing industry continues booming, which has led to the the town of Yiwu (a city of about 1.2m people in central Zhejiang province) being christened "China's Christmas village." The town has become the home of 600 factories that collectively churn out over 60% of all the world's Christmas decorations and accessories. The "elves" that staff these factories are mainly migrant labourers, working 12 hours a day for a maximum of £200 to £300 a month - and it turns out that all of them are not even entirely sure what Christmas is. Nevertheless, there are corridors lined with nothing but tinsel, streets throbbing with competing LED light shows, stockings of every size, plastic Christmas trees in blue and yellow and fluorescent pink, plastic pine cones in gold and silver. The complex of Yiwu International Trade Market was declared by the United Nations to be the "largest small commodity wholesale market in the world" and the scale of the operation necessitates a kind of urban plan, with this festival of commerce organised into five different districts, of which District Two is solely dedicated for Christmas stuff.
Self-Defense Tip: Don't Invite Hookers Over to Your House at 1am
Freedom Group on the Brink of Bankruptcy?
Yahoo group. That is all.
Come on be a smartie and join the yahoo group party! For the children.
And my lo-fi Twitter spew.
Tonight's post brought to you by the greatest gift ever:
Notice: Posted by permission of AceCorp LLC. Please e-mail overnight open thread tips plus $1 for S&H to maetenloch at gmail. Otherwise send your scraps to BizarroAce. Do not taunt happy-fun ball.
Comments
(Jump to bottom of comments)Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:30 PM (T1005)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:30 PM (A4oX7)
Posted by: Tmitsss at December 25, 2014 10:30 PM (Pa9vP)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 10:30 PM (16bOT)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 10:30 PM (16bOT)
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:31 PM (PqNKV)
Posted by: Mr. Natural at December 25, 2014 10:32 PM (/pOl7)
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:32 PM (PqNKV)
Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That at December 25, 2014 10:32 PM (RZzX3)
Posted by: Darth Randall at December 25, 2014 10:32 PM (KlVdw)
Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That at December 25, 2014 10:32 PM (RZzX3)
They should expand the map. I've been watching Brit and Aussie movies recently and have notice the 'dude' slipped in here and there.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 25, 2014 10:32 PM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:32 PM (doBIb)
-Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:32 PM (PqNKV)
They're filtering-in.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 10:33 PM (16bOT)
It happens to be one of my life long hot button issues.
I get into a lot of trouble when that button gets pushed.
Posted by: Skandia Recluse at December 25, 2014 10:33 PM (ootuS)
Slap! Mis! And the tentacled one! Is it just us here?
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:32 PM (PqNKV)
I haven't summoned the Corgis -- I just poured a beer. Did you summon Corgis?
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:33 PM (T1005)
Firing a 12 gauge in the house is a LOT louder than you'd think. Not so loud that the neighbors will call the cops, though.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:34 PM (PqNKV)
Firing a 12 gauge in the house is a LOT louder than you'd think. Not so loud that the neighbors will call the cops, though.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:34 PM (PqNKV)
Whoops.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:35 PM (doBIb)
-Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:33 PM (T1005)
Weft did and I reiterated it.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 10:35 PM (16bOT)
Nice job on a holiday Maet.
I never had a BB gun. I was given a .22 Marlin single shot and an H&R 20 gauge between 8-12 years of age
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:35 PM (A4oX7)
Posted by: NaCly Dog at December 25, 2014 10:35 PM (u82oZ)
Firing a 12 gauge in the house is a LOT louder than you'd think. Not so loud that the neighbors will call the cops, though."
-Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:34 PM (PqNKV)
The post, as delivered, deserves a... *HAH!*
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 10:36 PM (16bOT)
You know what I learned today?
Firing a 12 gauge in the house is a LOT louder than you'd think. Not so loud that the neighbors will call the cops, though.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:34 PM (PqNKV)
Oh, shit -- I take care to warn all the neighbors and do a preemptive call to the cops whenever I use a Ramset, I couldn't imagine the degree of alarm a 12-gauge would cause.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:36 PM (T1005)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 25, 2014 10:36 PM (QIrzm)
Posted by: Y-not on the phone at December 25, 2014 10:37 PM (9BRsg)
Really? You would admit this in writing. Are you that fucking stupid?
Well, yes and you voted for Obama.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 10:37 PM (0FSuD)
What did you have that you don't have anymore?
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:38 PM (T1005)
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 10:38 PM (KCxzN)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:38 PM (A4oX7)
I thought those things were reserved for flyover country.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:39 PM (PqNKV)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 25, 2014 10:39 PM (QIrzm)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 10:39 PM (16bOT)
I'm recovering from the turkey-coma, and the bird's carcass is now simmering in the 24 quart pot, well on the way to it's becoming a delicious, hearty and filling soup.
Truly, I wish I could make a couple hundred quarts of this soup, just to freeze into quart-sized containers, and send out to the Moronsphere.
It's that good. If any of you find yourself near to The Island in the next few days, let me know, and I'll heat up a bowl for you.
Barring that, though. I'll just pour a wee dram of bourbon, and raise my glass in a toast to.... The Horde!
*cheers!*
Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX
Posted by: Jim at December 25, 2014 10:40 PM (RzZOc)
Posted by: firefirefire at December 25, 2014 10:40 PM (E/XWt)
Posted by: kbdabear at December 25, 2014 10:40 PM (GrXXa)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:40 PM (doBIb)
Posted by: Darles Chickens at December 25, 2014 10:41 PM (Nzz0U)
Posted by: freaked at December 25, 2014 10:41 PM (JdEZJ)
Posted by: Kindltot at December 25, 2014 10:41 PM (t//F+)
NO ONE uses Dude in Central California... at least not in the Central Valley.
1. Its not Spanish...
2. Its a Coast phrase.... like Valley Girl type speech....
Posted by: Big Bad Wolf, Howling in the Woods. at December 25, 2014 10:41 PM (qh617)
They allow you to have Ramsets out there on the left coast?
I thought those things were reserved for flyover country.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:39 PM (PqNKV)
No, I've got one out in the garage. If you're nailing things to concrete, it's pretty much the preferred method.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:42 PM (T1005)
Posted by: bill-o at December 25, 2014 10:42 PM (AWwDY)
Posted by: freaked at December 25, 2014 10:42 PM (JdEZJ)
Posted by: eman at December 25, 2014 10:42 PM (MQEz6)
Posted by: Joe Biden at December 25, 2014 10:42 PM (4IFRz)
Posted by: Jinx the Cat at December 25, 2014 10:42 PM (l3vZN)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:43 PM (doBIb)
ohboyohboyohboyohboy
Posted by: ping at December 25, 2014 10:43 PM (JqAst)
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:34 PM
Yes. Also, firing a .357 Magnum out the passenger side window of your standard cab pick-up is frighteningly loud. The statute of limitations has expired, so I can tell that story now...
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 10:43 PM (KCxzN)
------------------
Nah - maybe I'll tell you privately.
And, no - I wasn't protecting anything, EC.
I was just mad at the world and I wanted to destroy something. Stupid. That's what it was.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:43 PM (PqNKV)
He welded the frame on last one into oblivion and replaced the front axle, (turninging his own threads), twice over the last two years.
The wheels were literally falling-off... lol.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 10:43 PM (16bOT)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 25, 2014 10:43 PM (QIrzm)
Firing a 12 gauge in the house is a LOT louder than you'd think. Not so loud that the neighbors will call the cops, though.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:34 PM (PqNKV)
Try 12 Gauges and M-14s, inside the superstructure of a ship... with no hearing protection on at all...
Posted by: Big Bad Wolf, Howling in the Woods. at December 25, 2014 10:44 PM (qh617)
Firing a 12 gauge in the house is a LOT louder than you'd think. Not so loud that the neighbors will call the cops, though.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:34 PM
Yes. Also, firing a .357 Magnum out the passenger side window of
your standard cab pick-up is frighteningly loud. The statute of
limitations has expired, so I can tell that story now...
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 10:43 PM (KCxzN)
Double-check the statute, first, and then we're all ears.....
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:44 PM (T1005)
Posted by: Big Bad Wolf
Nope. It was a regional thing until the 80's. It's spread far and wide.
Like I wrote above, I've heard it used in Brit and Aussie movies.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 25, 2014 10:44 PM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:44 PM (A4oX7)
Better idea would be to have Festivus start the day AFTER Christmas.
After the last couple of days, the wife needs a second Festivus this week.
Posted by: Ashley Judds Puffy Scamper at December 25, 2014 10:44 PM (+Fae7)
Firing it? I've always found that just waving it drunkenly out the driver's side window does the trick.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at December 25, 2014 10:44 PM (4IFRz)
Yeah, firing magnum anything is loud.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:45 PM (doBIb)
Firing a 12 gauge will wake people up.
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 25, 2014 10:39 PM (QIrzm)
And take a lot of sheet rock out of a room.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 10:45 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 25, 2014 10:46 PM (UVfht)
Posted by: Ashley Judds Puffy Scamper at December
I'm wishing my wife had one
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:46 PM (A4oX7)
WHAT?
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 25, 2014 10:46 PM (UVfht)
HUH?
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:47 PM (doBIb)
Second Christmas in the spring?
St John's Day, June 24th, is a holiday in South America.
I know this because it's my birthday and got stuck on the Bolivia border one year.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 10:47 PM (0FSuD)
-Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at December 25, 2014 10:44 PM (4IFRz)
I've found that an aluminum baseball bat can cause people to change lanes and exit a freeway wildly.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 10:47 PM (16bOT)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:47 PM (A4oX7)
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:43 PM (PqNKV)
I hope the TV survived. Mine usually went down like a Vietnamese hooker.
Posted by: Zombie Elvis Presley at December 25, 2014 10:47 PM (4IFRz)
Like I wrote above, I've heard it used in Brit and Aussie movies.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 25, 2014 10:44 PM (wr4LJ)
I work with a large cross section of both young and old here...
Have not heard it used for a long time...
Because it IS an 80s thing... and White...
Posted by: Big Bad Wolf, Howling in the Woods. at December 25, 2014 10:48 PM (qh617)
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 10:45 PM (0FSuD)
------------------
you don't say...
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:48 PM (PqNKV)
61 Yeah, firing magnum anything is loud.
WHAT?
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 25, 2014 10:46 PM (UVfht)
HUH?
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:47 PM (doBIb)
Speak up, damn it
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 10:48 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: Erowmero at December 25, 2014 10:48 PM (go5uR)
-Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:47 PM (doBIb)
I'm thinking that he "couldn't hear you". ...lol.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 10:49 PM (16bOT)
WHAT?
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 25, 2014 10:46 PM (UVfht)
HUH?
Posted by: EC at December 25
The ringing, it won't quit. Huh?,
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:49 PM (A4oX7)
He's been in the can for about two hours.
Some kid left him one of Mooch's school lunches near the tree.
Posted by: eman at December 25, 2014 10:49 PM (MQEz6)
And yes, I'm feeling much better. Can't say "normal", as that's a singularly unfamiliar state of being for me. ;-)
Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX
Posted by: Jim at December 25, 2014 10:49 PM (RzZOc)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 25, 2014 10:49 PM (QIrzm)
Posted by: EC
WHAT?
Posted by: Blanco Basura
HUH?
Posted by: EC
** flappy hands, flappy hands, flappy hands **
Posted by: Mandela Funeral Guy at December 25, 2014 10:49 PM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: Darth Randall at December 25, 2014 10:50 PM (KlVdw)
Posted by: Patrick from Ohio at December 25, 2014 10:50 PM (b6koZ)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:50 PM (A4oX7)
MY EARS ARE RINGING PRETTY BADLY, SO TYPE SLOWLY.
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 25, 2014 10:51 PM (UVfht)
Feliz Navidad from sunny Playa Del Carmen.
Woot!
If anybody is going for an all inclusive vacay, be sure to go with Iberostar. Our second, and they are tops.
Guess what?
Kids are spoiled n fight just as much when spending tons of money on them as when they're home. Can't raise 'em like I was raised tho or I'd be in jail.
Posted by: Justamom at December 25, 2014 10:51 PM (Wztg5)
Posted by: geezer der mensch at December 25, 2014 10:51 PM (1i/Fh)
Success!
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 10:51 PM (0FSuD)
If you are in to feeling sorry for yourself it might change your perspective.
Posted by: freaked at December 25, 2014 10:52 PM (JdEZJ)
Dude...
Dude!
Dude?
etc
Posted by: otho at December 25, 2014 10:52 PM (tBSrv)
Posted by:Nip Sipat December 25, 2014 10:45 PM (0FSuD)
------------------
you don't say...
Posted by: shredded chi at December
I know a half way decent insurance adjuster
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:52 PM (A4oX7)
https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/548325868515643392
https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/548326219008462849
https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/548326600375537664
https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/548326932207906816
Posted by: kbdabear at December 25, 2014 10:52 PM (GrXXa)
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:53 PM (T1005)
Posted by: Adriane the Pagan Holiday of Saturnalia Critic ... at December 25, 2014 10:53 PM (P+IZm)
Posted by: geezer der mensch at December 25, 2014 10:54 PM (1i/Fh)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 10:54 PM (16bOT)
69 And take a lot of sheet rock out of a room.
Posted by:Nip Sipat December 25, 2014 10:45 PM (0FSuD)
------------------
you don't say...
Posted by: shredded chi at December
I know a half way decent insurance adjuster
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:52 PM (A4oX7)
Chi laughs at sheetrock repairs -- "HA!", he says.
That's why I knew he'd know what a Ramset was.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:54 PM (T1005)
my gf is way, way loud when I fire off in a magnum condom
/sarc
Posted by: LIV in Baltimore at December 25, 2014 10:55 PM (sEUh+)
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:53 PM (T1005)
------------------
Don't panic, man...
and for the love of God, don't send the police here!
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:55 PM (PqNKV)
if any institution celbrates Kwanzaa , demand equal time for Festivus.
Posted by: avi at December 25, 2014 10:55 PM (viqX2)
What banker steals a deposit to fuck someone? Really a stretch and really anti capitalist.
So how does the poor small businessman get saved? Another rich guy wires him money, so maybe having rich friends is the key?
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 10:56 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:56 PM (T1005)
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:44 PM
Nothing illegal, just a bit of hyperbole on my part.
Twenty+ years ago I belonged to a gun club that had a "range". Ten-ish acres surrounded by double 10' tall barbed wire fences. They had plowed up a 30' berm as a back-drop, & had shooting stations out to 300 yards.
No range officer or any other supervision, so you could think up all sorts of "creative" shooting scenarios...like parking you truck on the 100 yard line, standing in the bed, leaning on the roof of the cab & shooting your SKS @ Hi-C juice cans. (doG, I miss that rifle. I think it sunk the fastest when the canoe over-turned)...or rolling your truck down the 25 yard line & shooting your Ruger Speed Six (what don't float, either) out the passenger side window...
Good times
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 10:56 PM (KCxzN)
Posted by: lowandslow at December 25, 2014 10:56 PM (BXkFh)
Thanks, for the note Chi. It was a nice surprise.
Posted by: Jinx the Cat at December 25, 2014 10:57 PM (l3vZN)
my Holiday ended sundown on Wednesday. Why the Happy Holidays Bullshit?
Posted by: avi at December 25, 2014 10:57 PM (viqX2)
Gave my hubby a couple of Brad Thor novels.
He never sits long enough to read and he can't hardly put these down. I knew plane and beach time was my best shot.
Books for all this year.
Hope everyone got something they like, and/or the satisfaction of being able to give something a loved one really likes.
Posted by: Justamom at December 25, 2014 10:57 PM (FHt5a)
What banker steals a deposit to fuck someone? Really a stretch and really anti capitalist.
So how does the poor small businessman get saved? Another rich guy wires him money, so maybe having rich friends is the key?
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 10:56 PM (0FSuD)
Crony capitalism
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:57 PM (A4oX7)
Fuck you, bigot.
Merry Christmas,
@qdpsteve
(although hopefully he's just another Twit-troll)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 10:58 PM (EvYMx)
Posted by: geezer der mensch at December 25, 2014 10:58 PM (1i/Fh)
Posted by: Adriane the Pagan Holiday of Saturnalia Critic ... at December 25, 2014 10:58 PM (P+IZm)
When those complain about Christmas, I ask them to thank us for giving them a nice holiday day off or double time if working.
Posted by: bossy barbara at December 25, 2014 10:58 PM (vPh3W)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 10:58 PM (EvYMx)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:59 PM (doBIb)
89 OK, chi -- you've got emails. One more urgent than the other.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:53 PM (T1005)
------------------
Don't panic, man...
and for the love of God, don't send the police here!
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 10:55 PM (PqNKV)
If they don't show up for gunfire, why should I expect them to show up for anything else?!?!?!?
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:59 PM (T1005)
Posted by: Justamom at December 25, 2014 11:00 PM (Wztg5)
------------------
Don't panic, man...
and for the love of God, don't send the police here!
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25
Why? You a cross dresser? That's just cray
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:00 PM (A4oX7)
I got a bottle of hand made small batch bourbon, two boxes of Federal .45 ACP 230gr FMJ, and the "American Sniper" novel.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:59 PM (doBIb)
And all I got was stuffed and drunk.
Shit.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:00 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: geezer der mensch at December 25, 2014 11:00 PM (1i/Fh)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:00 PM (EvYMx)
always leave drywall repairs to the pros - mine look like someone
smeared congealed sour cream on the wall, then painted over it...not
good
Posted by: geezer der mensch at December 25, 2014 10:58 PM (1i/Fh)
All that stuff looks like that. Our house was built in 1955 and remodeled or patched pretty much annually since then.....it's like a library of drywall techniques.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:02 PM (T1005)
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:56 PM (T1005)
But all those extra appendages should help when hanging the ceiling tiles by yourself
Posted by: PM Rich at December 25, 2014 11:02 PM (OxHMs)
Probably time to finish this wine and try to go back to bed an pass out again.
It's a dirty job, but damn it I can handle it.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:02 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:00 PM (EvYMx)
Yeah, it's a fellow moron.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:02 PM (doBIb)
And all I got was stuffed and drunk.
Shit.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014
Probably a slice of Kay Hagen pie to boot
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:03 PM (A4oX7)
-Posted by: geezer der mensch at December 25, 2014 10:58 PM (1i/Fh)
I was a "pro" within seventy-two hours of being ridden, chided, derided and shat-upon by a merciless Boss ...lol.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:03 PM (16bOT)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25
------------------
There's actually a (kinda) funny story behind that comment.
Maybe I'll tell it one drunken night
Yes, it involves me, Tucker, cthulhu and the police.
Doesn't sound so funny now that I think about it...
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:03 PM (PqNKV)
Sorry about my mean words above. For a few minutes I thought you were serious.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:03 PM (EvYMx)
Super duper ONT!
I'm printing the Red Rider pic when I get home.
Been without Internet for almost a week because I'm too cheap to pay an extra $50 per device to the resort.
Tonight's access must be some kind of Christmas Miracle.
Posted by: Justamom at December 25, 2014 11:03 PM (Wztg5)
98 Besides -- sheetrock repairs are easy. Even I can do 'em (though it is a mess to clean mud out of the tentacles).
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 10:56 PM (T1005)
But all those extra appendages should help when hanging the ceiling tiles by yourself
Posted by: PM Rich at December 25, 2014 11:02 PM (OxHMs)
I don't do ceiling tiles.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:04 PM (T1005)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:03 PM (A4oX7)
Trust me, she give an awful BJ, but she does like anal.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:04 PM (0FSuD)
Love & Joy unto you ...
and all their friends, too ...
Posted by: Adriane the Pagan Holiday of Saturnalia Critic ... at December 25, 2014 11:04 PM (P+IZm)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 10:46 PM (A4oX7)
Actually, she turned last night and today into Festivus II, but thank God it wasn't anything I had done.
Posted by: Ashley Judds Puffy Scamper at December 25, 2014 11:04 PM (+Fae7)
It does sound funny. As long as you are ok that's all that matters!
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:04 PM (A4oX7)
Posted by: PM Rich at December 25, 2014 11:05 PM (OxHMs)
Need some medical advice from the Horde. Any other men or women here, ever have issues with *always* feeling like you have to urinate? That's what I've had for about 36 hours now.
Tried cranberry juice and it's helped, but it seems to have come back somewhat. Hoping it's just a bladder or urethra infection and that if all else fails, some antibiotics will take care of it.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:05 PM (EvYMx)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:07 PM (16bOT)
You know, they sell these self adhesive mesh screen thingies in various sizes that actually make drywall repair a lot easier and better looking.
Not like I have a lot of experience with a lot of various size holes in my walls or anything...
Posted by: Justamom at December 25, 2014 11:07 PM (Wztg5)
Seriously, go see a urologist or pretend you're an illegal immigrant & go to ER
From experience nothing to fool around with
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:07 PM (A4oX7)
Posted by: geezer der mensch at December 25, 2014 11:07 PM (1i/Fh)
That is why the laments of the small-town leftists get voiced with such intemperance and desperation. As if those who voice them are fighting off the nagging thought: If the Republicans aren't particularly evil, then maybe I'm not particularly special.
That's ok. You're still a snowflake.
Posted by: t-bird at December 25, 2014 11:07 PM (FcR7P)
you have to urinate?
It's either diabetes or ebola.
Posted by: Wilford Brimley at December 25, 2014 11:08 PM (FGEvF)
Need some medical advice from the Horde. Any other men or women here, ever have issues with *always* feeling like you have to urinate? That's what I've had for about 36 hours now.
Tried cranberry juice and it's helped, but it seems to have come back somewhat. Hoping it's just a bladder or urethra infection and that if all else fails, some antibiotics will take care of it.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:05 PM (EvYMx)
Um, call your doctor.
That's my advise.
Posted by: eman at December 25, 2014 11:08 PM (MQEz6)
Time for a prostate-check, amigo.
...by a qualified M.D.
I've got better things to do.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:08 PM (16bOT)
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 25, 2014 11:09 PM (UVfht)
https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/548325868515643392
https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/548326219008462849
https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/548326600375537664
https://twitter.com/kbdabear/status/548326932207906816
Posted by: kbdabear at December 25, 2014 10:52 PM (GrXXa)
Thanks!
Now I can use the hand lotion and tissues that Santa brought me.
Posted by: Ashley Judds Puffy Scamper at December 25, 2014 11:09 PM (+Fae7)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:45 PM
Before the tragic boating accident (I was lucky to escape with my life), that was my secret happy. I'd go to the range & everyone would be going "Pew, Pew" with their 9MMs. I'd load up the Full-Blown MFer rounds in the .357 & light 3 or 4 of them up.
It was like someone had declared a cease fire. Everyone stopped shooting & stepped back out of their stalls & said WTF was THAT?
Then, there were the times when someone was shooting a Desert Eagle or a .44 Mag. I went back to .38+P those days.
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:09 PM (KCxzN)
Posted by: mallfly at December 25, 2014 11:09 PM (zjcTL)
plumbing be different for guys.
but, how much cranberry juice?
Posted by: Adriane the Pagan Holiday of Saturnalia Critic ... at December 25, 2014 11:10 PM (P+IZm)
Thanks.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:10 PM (EvYMx)
Posted by: PM Rich at December 25, 2014 11:10 PM (OxHMs)
Posted by: Patrick from Ohio at December 25, 2014 11:10 PM (b6koZ)
Don't mean to be TMI but...
Need some medical advice from the Horde. Any other men or women
here, ever have issues with *always* feeling like you have to urinate?
That's what I've had for about 36 hours now.
Tried cranberry juice and it's helped, but it seems to have come
back somewhat. Hoping it's just a bladder or urethra infection and that
if all else fails, some antibiotics will take care of it.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:05 PM (EvYMx)
That can be anything from diabetes to prostate cancer to several common and harmless infections to one of the more annoying side effects from a non-prescription drug that the TV announcer reads through at warp factor six. Treat it seriously.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:10 PM (T1005)
found out that there's a law in NYS that liquor stores must be closed
on Christmas.
Explains all the beer sales at Circle K today.
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 25, 2014 11:11 PM (UVfht)
And I admit I've had issues with not drinking enough water for years. I tend not to drink anything until I'm really thirsty, which I've found recently probably has a lot to do with my throat phlegm issues at least.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:11 PM (EvYMx)
What's the recoil like? I picture myself flying backwards through the air.
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 25, 2014 11:11 PM (+XMAD)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 10:45 PM
Just a matter of days and our new indoor range opens up.,should be interesting
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:11 PM (A4oX7)
you're old.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:11 PM (PqNKV)
Posted by: Islamic Rage Boy at December 25, 2014 11:12 PM (e8kgV)
Posted by: CM at December 25, 2014 11:12 PM (3eQnI)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:12 PM (EvYMx)
well imagine my surprise when I went out to get some sustenance and
found out that there's a law in NYS that liquor stores must be closed
on Christmas.
Posted by: mallfly at December 25, 2014 11:09 PM (zjcTL)
You've got to be kidding....NYS mandates that some folks will be in a killin' mood on Christmas?!?!?
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:13 PM (T1005)
Vic told me this weeks ago. Ha ha.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:13 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: Patrick from Ohio at December 25, 2014 11:10 PM (b6koZ)
They don't like Loogie, the Kwanza Hobo?
Why the heck not?
Posted by: eman at December 25, 2014 11:13 PM (MQEz6)
Back in college, friend of mine fired his .44 Mag to clear his apartment when one of his roommates got punched in the face. Everyone vanished like magic. Cops showed up in 5 minutes. I was an innocent bystander on the other side of the complex simply gawking at what was going on that I had no idea about.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:13 PM (doBIb)
Thanks.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December
At age 48 you should've been fingered fucked for the past 8 years by your Doc
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:14 PM (A4oX7)
Not quite, but you do need a firm grip.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:15 PM (doBIb)
"You'd need One-Hundred Jubbily-Jubbily, Boogity-Boogity, Ancient Asian Cure Caplets to equal ONE of our HorseShit Pills!1!!eleventy!1!"
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:15 PM (16bOT)
Probably time for another one. It's uncomfortable but beats dying.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:15 PM (EvYMx)
We all went immediately to bed. Never found the round she shot into the ceiling below my son's bedroom.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:16 PM (0FSuD)
Following along with your declaration of "TMI": have you had a colonoscopy?
Do it. Now. Best thirty minute nap you've ever had. It could explain away a few things.
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:16 PM (KCxzN)
Really.
I shouldn't have said anything. But I figured you all would understand. Sometimes yo just gotta bust a round off you know?
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:16 PM (PqNKV)
Posted by: Infidel at December 25, 2014 11:18 PM (du6mO)
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:18 PM (KCxzN)
Again, I'm not looking forward to it but considering the alternative... ;-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:18 PM (EvYMx)
Ok, UTI n phlegm, you want TMI?
People actually do get very ill and then recurring illness and death from UTI gone kidney infection.
Here's some super TMI, because I'm also a giver:
DO drink water.
DO not get dehydrated.
DO urinate after intercourse.
And for the grossest but very important-
DO pee a little bit as you are exiting water from a lake or river. Gross but the organisms that swim in are grosser.
DO
Posted by: Justamom at December 25, 2014 11:18 PM (FHt5a)
Really.
I shouldn't have said anything. But I figured you all would understand. Sometimes yo just gotta bust a round off you know?
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:16 PM (PqNKV)
Good thing you can pick up like-new HDTV's tomorrow!
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:18 PM (doBIb)
Probably time for another one. It's uncomfortable but beats dying.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:15 PM (EvYMx)
Pas tests are alright. Prostate exam ain't bad. I've had the biopsy that sucks.
Didn't know you were 48 figured you for much younger
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:18 PM (A4oX7)
MH, had *one* prostate check thus far. Came back okay.
Probably time for another one. It's uncomfortable but beats dying.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:15 PM (EvYMx)
There's also a blood test for PSA (Prostate-Specific Antigen) which is the next thing they do if the manual check comes back bad or inconclusive. If your insurance covers it, you can skip the manual check....which also gets you a baseline that can come in handy later.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:18 PM (T1005)
-Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:16 PM (PqNKV)
*HAH!*
Merry Christmas, Brother!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:18 PM (16bOT)
We think of it more like ... "Plan ahead on Christmas Eve for all you party needs!"
Posted by: Doc 'Nannystate' Holiday ... at December 25, 2014 11:19 PM (P+IZm)
Posted by: Patrick from Ohio at December 25, 2014 11:19 PM (b6koZ)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:20 PM (doBIb)
Going for another test next month. Most men will get prostate cancer, it usually doesn't kill them, unless it does.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:21 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:05 PM/i]
Following along with your declaration of "TMI": have you had a colonoscopy?
Do it. Now. Best thirty minute nap you've ever had. It could explain away a few things.
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:16 PM (KCxzN)
(1) The procedure ain't fun, but it isn't that bad -- I had mine without sedation (then, again, I've had two dental crowns done without anesthetic).
(2) The prep, by contrast, is that bad.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:21 PM (T1005)
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 25, 2014 10:40 PM
Are you in the Phoenix area? Sure sounds like it. The in-laws are now in Peoria.
Posted by: Farmer at December 25, 2014 11:21 PM (PzqA/)
And you didn't take her gun from her?
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:21 PM (doBIb)
And thanks to Justamom and cthulhu as well as everyone else for their advice. Yeah, I admit yesterday when I finally looked up my condition, I was bracing to see a giant blood-red "PROSTATE CANCER" banner across my monitor...
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:21 PM (EvYMx)
Posted by: shredded chi
*well, more legal than a Discharge w/i city limits.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 25, 2014 11:21 PM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:21 PM (doBIb)
Immediately, it was MY gun she was fucking with. DRUNK!
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:22 PM (0FSuD)
-Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:16 PM (PqNKV)
*HAH!*
Merry Christmas, Brother!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December
Yeah, but never in the house always outside
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:22 PM (A4oX7)
Posted by: Infidel at December 25, 2014 11:22 PM (du6mO)
Pyridium over the counter for pain but seriously, a doctor.
Posted by: Justamom at December 25, 2014 11:23 PM (Wztg5)
He was at least funny about it, including that he found things in his toilet he hadn't seen in years: a string of pearls, a disposable camera... ;-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:23 PM (EvYMx)
My online Korean newspaper has an article that says sex peaks on Christmas Day based on condom sales.
So for some of you, there's still half an hour to put on a Lynda Carter "Wonder Woman" DVD, some tights and seduce the ones you love.
Posted by: Stateless Infidel at December 25, 2014 11:24 PM (AC0lD)
Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX
Posted by: Jim at December 25, 2014 11:24 PM (RzZOc)
Posted by: OG Celtic-American at December 25, 2014 11:25 PM (Y2eQR)
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:21 PM (T1005)
Bad, fucking bad
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:25 PM (A4oX7)
Posted by: ThunderB at December 25, 2014 11:25 PM (zOTsN)
Tried cranberry juice and it's helped, but it seems to have come
back somewhat. Hoping it's just a bladder or urethra infection and that
if all else fails, some antibiotics will take care of it.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:05 PM (EvYMx)
Women are more prone to get urinary tract infections than men (easier for us to,er, get infected, I guess) and I've had a few. Not so much any more, but I know how awful they can be.
Until you see a doctor, cranberry juice helps somewhat - but they now have over the counter medicine which works better than juice. Can't remember the name of the stuff I used last time I had one (starts with an A), but picked it up at CVS for about $8. It doesn't cure the infection, but it alleviates the symptons nicely. The only side effect is it turn your pee a weird neon orange, it's practically glow in the dark piss. But as long as that awful sensation of having to go stops, I wouldn't have minded if I was peeing all the colors in a '60's Peter Max poster.
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 25, 2014 11:25 PM (+XMAD)
Also glad to be living in the center of a non-dude area.
Posted by: SpongeBobSaget at December 25, 2014 11:25 PM (zauWW)
This means that I will have to stop eating and drinking in about 30 minutes, and also that my triglycerides will be in the stratosphere since I was unwilling to curtail my drinking for the past few days.
Posted by: rickl at December 25, 2014 11:26 PM (sdi6R)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:26 PM (doBIb)
Male Feminist is AoSHQ regular Warden being snarky about so-called male feminists. It's a little creepy how close he gets to the tone though.
Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at December 25, 2014 11:26 PM (GDulk)
And thanks for the concern, folks.
Really.
I shouldn't have said anything. But I figured you all would understand. Sometimes yo just gotta bust a round off you know?
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:16 PM (PqNKV)
As is said in Ecclesiastes: "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven...."
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:27 PM (T1005)
No booze
No nookie
Shit.
Posted by: OG Celtic
So you are in your 3rd decade of marriage? Congrats
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:27 PM (A4oX7)
But yeah, it's probably time to see the doctor again. Good thing I have a good one. Too bad I don't see her as often as she'd like me to though...
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:28 PM (EvYMx)
This almost guarantees me some Boxing Day sex with 99.9999% certainty.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:28 PM (doBIb)
Christmas cards have arrived in Iowa mailboxes this season from at least five Republican possible presidential candidates: Mitt Romney, Ted Cruz, Chris Christie, Rand Paul and Marco Rubio, voters told The Des Moines Register.
Ho ho -- oy.
Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at December 25, 2014 11:28 PM (kdS6q)
Posted by: Infidel at December 25, 2014 11:28 PM (du6mO)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:29 PM (A4oX7)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:29 PM (A4oX7)
Well, at least there's a cure for that.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:30 PM (doBIb)
Again, I'm not looking forward to it but considering the alternative... ;-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:18 PM
Get it done, Steve. Not being funny here, but invest in a "trial pack" of Depends. Couple of bucks @ your local Walmart. By sundown on the second day of "cleansing", you will thank me.
It's not that bad, really. We frighten ourselves with horror stories, but it's like going to the dentist, but with prophafenal (sp?). It's all good.
Someone more sober than I should find Dave Barry's "Colonoscopy" post & put up the link
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:30 PM (KCxzN)
You gave a drunk a loaded gun?
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:26 PM (doBIb)
No, actually, I was showing it to her, a SW 38 Detective Special. I had taken the rounds out and she put them back in. She had no clue the gun had no safety.
Lucky she did shot me.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:31 PM (0FSuD)
Polliwog, Warden's doing a good job.
And Donna, thanks for that tip. Like you said, I could pee an actual leprechaun rainbow and as long as I feel *empty* aftewards, it'd be worth it. ;-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:31 PM (EvYMx)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:29 PM (A4oX7)
Well, at least there's a cure for that.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:30 PM (doBIb)
If you're a guy?
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:31 PM (A4oX7)
taken the rounds out and she put them back in. She had no clue the gun
had no safety.
So you gave a drunk a gun?
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:32 PM (doBIb)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:32 PM (EvYMx)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:28 PM (doBIb)
I hate a fucking, ha ha, braggart.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:32 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: Braille is Fun at December 25, 2014 11:32 PM (FGEvF)
No booze
No nookie
Shit."
-Posted by: OG Celtic-American at December 25, 2014 11:25 PM (Y2eQR)
I've got a Kohl's gift-card I can shove through the USB port, amigo.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:32 PM (16bOT)
have over the counter medicine which works better than juice.
Posted by: Donna V. (handing out sacks of
ampersands for Christmas) at December 25, 2014 11:25 PM (+XMAD)
My mom had a VERY serious kidney condition this year and FINALLY ended up in the provinces best hospital. In her follow up visit after fully healing, thank you God, she asked about Cranberry juice and he said that many of the juices out there are actually made up of mostly grape juice.
And because of all of the sugar, he didn't really recommend cranberry juice. For what it's worth, I'm just tossing that out there....
and all the best qdpsteve. There's nothing you can't handle and hopefully this is just a minor thing.
Posted by: Stateless Infidel at December 25, 2014 11:32 PM (AC0lD)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:32 PM (doBIb)
Read it doesn't actually knock you out, it just sends you to crazy fairy DNC-donor land for about a half hour.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:33 PM (EvYMx)
It's funny, I was expecting to feel a bit of discomfort for a few days, but didn't at all. No pains in the ass whatsoever. You'd think that having a probe snake through your innards would leave you a bit sore, but no - at least not in my case. Modern medicine. Miracle.
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 25, 2014 11:33 PM (+XMAD)
Posted by: Infidel at December 25, 2014 11:28 PM
Go to Victoria's Secret.
Fap.
Problem solved. I await the police report.
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:33 PM (KCxzN)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:32 PM (doBIb)
She picked it up off the table. I was not paying any attention, and I was, of course, completely sober myself.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:33 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:33 PM (16bOT)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:29 PM (A4oX7)
Well, at least there's a cure for that.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:30 PM (doBIb)
If you're a guy?
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:31 PM (A4oX7)
Just as an FYI....guys can get yeast infections.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:34 PM (T1005)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:34 PM (EvYMx)
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:33 PM (0FSuD)
Oh man, you're lucky you're not dead or someone else in your family is dead. Having guns out with drunks around is a bad move.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:34 PM (doBIb)
And I heard for the colonoscopy, they give you propofol-- the Michael Jackson stuff.
Read it doesn't actually knock you out, it just sends you to crazy fairy DNC-donor land for about a half hour.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:33 PM (EvYMx)
Yeah, it's good stuff. Don't start talking before the drip starts, cause you will tell shit you shouldn't tell.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:35 PM (0FSuD)
it's not quite 17 feet long...
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:35 PM (KCxzN)
I think?
Maybe?
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014
Leave it to a moron guy to come down with a yeast infection.
J/K QDP
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:35 PM (A4oX7)
There's also a blood test for PSA (Prostate-Specific Antigen) which is the next thing they do if the manual check comes back bad or inconclusive. If your insurance covers it, you can skip the manual check....which also gets you a baseline that can come in handy later.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:18 PM (T1005)
That was a very pleasant surprise at my annual checkup this year.
Doc even said no one has complained yet.
Posted by: Ashley Judds Puffy Scamper at December 25, 2014 11:35 PM (+Fae7)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:35 PM (doBIb)
Posted by: Infidel at December 25, 2014 11:35 PM (du6mO)
I also heard, if the docs find any growth during the colonoscopy, they just cut it out.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:35 PM (EvYMx)
Merry Christmas, 'Rons & 'Ettes. Hope Santa was good to you all this year!
Posted by: ALH at December 25, 2014 11:36 PM (btTLZ)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:36 PM (EvYMx)
(Thunder, thanks, but I'm good. Mad at the world, but good.)
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:36 PM (zeEqS)
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:34 PM (doBIb)
Yeah, you are right, AND I don't need the lecture. Bad fuck up. Why a woman would reload a pistol is beyond my comprehension.
Live and learn.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:37 PM (0FSuD)
There's a reason I don't store my leftover pizza dough between my legs anymore... ;-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:37 PM (EvYMx)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 25, 2014 11:37 PM (rsO9D)
Posted by: Barrel at December 25, 2014 11:37 PM (FGEvF)
Yes, that was me.
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:37 PM (KCxzN)
Fap.
Problem solved. I await the police report.
That would be a police report since I am of the female persuasion.
Posted by: Infidel at December 25, 2014 11:37 PM (du6mO)
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:37 PM (0FSuD)
The best thing about the colonoscopy? When you go home afterwards,
sleep a couple of hours and then get up and have yourself a big ribeye
because you're ravenously hungry at that point. That was the best steak
evah and after all that Go-Litely crap that empties you out, I felt I
deserved it.
It's funny, I was expecting to feel a bit of discomfort for a few
days, but didn't at all. No pains in the ass whatsoever. You'd think
that having a probe snake through your innards would leave you a bit
sore, but no - at least not in my case. Modern medicine. Miracle.
Posted by: Donna V. (handing out sacks of
ampersands for Christmas) at December 25, 2014 11:33 PM (+XMAD)
I felt oddly rearranged a the top right corner (there was some difficulty there) for a while, but that got better after about a week. Thing is, anatomy textbooks are wildly inaccurate about those areas -- that stuff is all slopped around in there and moves around constantly.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:37 PM (T1005)
Posted by: Infidel at December 25, 2014 11:37 PM (du6mO)
We're not supposed to judge anymore.
Posted by: EC at December 25, 2014 11:38 PM (doBIb)
If you need an extraction I can be there in about 40 minutes.
It's up to you to explain to the in-laws why you're drawing circles on their maps.
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 25, 2014 11:38 PM (UVfht)
I'd be dead about six times by now. ;-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:38 PM (EvYMx)
237 Moron Pro-Tip : DO NOT feed your 16 pound puppeh all the fat off the Christmas ham. OMG. I couldn't cut through the air in here with a machete...
(Thunder, thanks, but I'm good. Mad at the world, but good.)
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:36 PM (zeEqS)
All the fat?
Yikes
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:38 PM (A4oX7)
Posted by: RWC at December 25, 2014 11:38 PM (WlUIO)
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:39 PM (KCxzN)
And anyone else I might have missed, thanks to you guys too. Love the support that's available here. :-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:39 PM (EvYMx)
Donna, thanks for that tip too. Mmm, ribeye steak... ;-)
I also heard, if the docs find any growth during the colonoscopy, they just cut it out.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:35 PM (EvYMx)
I had something like five nips. No biggie. Worst part of recovery was at the upper right corner -- didn't even feel the nips when they happened.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:40 PM (T1005)
Christmas ham. OMG. I couldn't cut through the air in here with a
machete...
Well, wait. That shit you will be cleaning up will smell great.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:40 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: Infidel at December 25, 2014 11:37 PM
Go on....
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:41 PM (KCxzN)
that stuff is all slopped around in there and moves around constantly.
I'm always one step ahead of eviction!
Posted by: Tapeworm at December 25, 2014 11:41 PM (FGEvF)
Posted by: ThunderB at December 25, 2014 11:41 PM (zOTsN)
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:36 PM (zeEqS)
Yep. Brother brought his little Boston Terrier who got into the ham and pork scraps. Smelled like everybody walked through dog shit.
Posted by: RWC at December 25, 2014 11:41 PM (WlUIO)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:42 PM (16bOT)
In fairness, I can imagine that colon cleanse *has* to be pretty powerful stuff. After all, it's cleaning out *50 years worth* of leftover dung and God knows what else.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:42 PM (EvYMx)
Moron Pro-Tip : DO NOT feed your 16 pound puppeh all the fat off the
Christmas ham. OMG. I couldn't cut through the air in here with a
machete...
(Thunder, thanks, but I'm good. Mad at the world, but good.)
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:36 PM (zeEqS)
You didn't.
It's a good thing you fired off the 12-gauge earlier, 'cause if you'd've done it now, the methane explosion might've leveled your house.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:43 PM (T1005)
Pic's or it didn't happen, you know the rules.
Posted by: Nip Sip at December 25, 2014 11:43 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:40 PM (T1005)
Why you so racist gaijin Yankee Cthulhu.
Posted by: RWC at December 25, 2014 11:43 PM (WlUIO)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014 11:44 PM (A4oX7)
[/rimshot]
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:44 PM (EvYMx)
I got them a lot in my 20's and cranberry juice always seemed to do the trick and then 6 months ago I got one and at 2 am in the morning I got dressed and walked down the block to a 24/7 convenience store I was so miserable and desperate and I got a big bottle of Ocean Spray and drank it down. And it didn't do much of anything.
When I went to work the next day, a nurse advised me to get the over the counter meds to alleviate the discomfort instead of bothering with cranberry juice. And that worked. 25 years ago, I don't believe there were over the counter meds for it so you had to rely on the cranberry juice until you saw the doctor.
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 25, 2014 11:45 PM (+XMAD)
Posted by: PaleRider, click on my sig and vote for Lost Fantasy daily at December 25, 2014 11:46 PM (7w/kf)
Yikes
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 25, 2014
------------------
Maybe not ALL of it , but everything I cut off as I carved it.
Good grief, Charlie Brown. I didn't know something that was alive could stink this badly.
He seems happy, though. And oddly, proud of himself.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:47 PM (At6lQ)
*Then* if I have no serious relief, or another flare-up, hurry in to the office.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:48 PM (EvYMx)
Not trying to be a buzzkill, but this is Serious You Guys.
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:49 PM (KCxzN)
Moron Pro-Tip : DO NOT feed your 16 pound puppeh all the fat off the
Christmas ham. OMG. I couldn't cut through the air in here with a
machete...
(Thunder, thanks, but I'm good. Mad at the world, but good.)
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:36 PM (zeEqS)
You didn't.
It's a good thing you fired off the 12-gauge earlier, 'cause if you'd've done it now, the methane explosion might've leveled your house.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:43 PM (T1005)
I think after eating all of that, that pup's sphincter's power to hold back the impending crapalanche would be severely tested if a gun or other loud noise went off.
Posted by: Ashley Judds Puffy Scamper at December 25, 2014 11:49 PM (+Fae7)
-Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:47 PM (At6lQ)
I sincerely hope that your carpeting stays its original color. Dogs don't break-down fat like we do.
I HOPE this is the "End-Stage" for that bit of inconvenience!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:49 PM (16bOT)
Great. Hope that machine is well-oiled. I don't want you all to read about me getting "pinched to death" in the OR. ;-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:50 PM (EvYMx)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:51 PM (EvYMx)
265 RWC, consider cthulhu lucky. I'll be lucky if at my colonoscopy, the docs don't find an entire P.F. Chang's franchise.
[/rimshot]
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:44 PM (EvYMx
Ugh. When are you going? Sorry. Lazy to look upthread.
Posted by: RWC at December 25, 2014 11:52 PM (WlUIO)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:53 PM (16bOT)
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 25, 2014 11:53 PM (F2IAQ)
If you missed it: I've constantly felt like I have to urinate, for about 36 hours now.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:53 PM (EvYMx)
http://www.miamiherald.com/living/liv-columns-blogs/dave-barry/article1928847.html
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:53 PM (KCxzN)
Posted by: cthulhu
It's like a bad case of athlete's foot in the crotch. Burns like a bitch.
Posted by: rickb223 at December 25, 2014 11:54 PM (tJipK)
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:47 PM (At6lQ)
I know he's a puppeh, but that earns him honorary Moron status.
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 25, 2014 11:54 PM (+XMAD)
-Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 25, 2014 11:53 PM (F2IAQ)
God Bless It.
...it can't go fast enough!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:54 PM (16bOT)
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:55 PM (KCxzN)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:50 PM (EvYMx)
Either machine or the 4 million Dreamers.
Take you pick
Posted by: RWC at December 25, 2014 11:55 PM (WlUIO)
Posted by: Infidel at December 25, 2014 11:55 PM (du6mO)
Posted by: RWC at December 25, 2014 11:55 PM (WlUIO)
Posted by: Ralphie Parker at December 25, 2014 11:55 PM (W5DcG)
The old year hastens away...
Posted by: Mike Hammer
And the older you get, the faster they hasten........
Posted by: rickb223 at December 25, 2014 11:56 PM (tJipK)
-Posted by: cthulhu
Most won't notice until there's a painful loaf of pumpernickel.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:56 PM (16bOT)
Posted by: Ben Had at December 25, 2014 11:56 PM (kabzo)
Posted by: cthulhu at December 25, 2014 11:57 PM (T1005)
...it can't go fast enough!
Posted by: ColdBeer
----------------
Perhaps.
It seems that every past year becomes the 'Good Old Days'.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 25, 2014 11:57 PM (F2IAQ)
;-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:58 PM (EvYMx)
278 RWC, nowhere yet. Depends on what the doc has to say and find about my current condition.
If you missed it: I've constantly felt like I have to urinate, for about 36 hours now.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:53 PM (EvYMx)
Me personally I would wait it out for a bit more. But to be honest, I make dumb choices. Get in and get it checked.
Posted by: RWC at December 25, 2014 11:58 PM (WlUIO)
Plus, he has a doggy door & knows to use it.
*btw, "crapalanche" may be my new favorite word, AJPS.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:58 PM (VF2hp)
;-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:58 PM (EvYMx)
Good call.
Posted by: RWC at December 25, 2014 11:59 PM (WlUIO)
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 25, 2014 11:59 PM (F2IAQ)
-Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:55 PM (KCxzN)
Pro Tip:
-Add [ / i ], [ / b ], [ / u ], [ / s ] to your Nic.
You are the sort-of-dude who needs save-tags!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:59 PM (16bOT)
&&&
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 25, 2014 11:55 PM (KCxzN)
Well, that just warms my heart. &&&&&
Be careful with the buggers though. Ricardo ( I think it was Ricardo) blew up the last thread with ampersand abuse and had a brief stay in the Barrel.
Ampersands must be used judiciously.
&&
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 25, 2014 11:59 PM (+XMAD)
Posted by: Adriane the Pagan Holiday of Saturnalia Critic ... at December 26, 2014 12:00 AM (P+IZm)
Warsteiner. Because life's too short to drink cheap beer.
Dude! I gots that bumper-sticker on the side of my summer-time beer cooler
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 26, 2014 12:00 AM (KCxzN)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 26, 2014 12:00 AM (QIrzm)
Wish I new how to do a search. That would be a good read.
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 12:01 AM (du6mO)
All hardwood floors Slap.
Plus, he has a doggy door knows to use it.
*btw, "crapalanche" may be my new favorite word, AJPS.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:58 PM (VF2hp)
How did he react to the bangstick, BTW? Think you'll have him retrieving ducks any time soon?
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 12:02 AM (T1005)
Soon the urethra will overrule any reservations about a doctor visit.
Posted by: Raspy at December 26, 2014 12:02 AM (FGEvF)
It seems that every past year becomes the 'Good Old Days'."
-Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 25, 2014 11:57 PM (F2IAQ)
Two close losses and three suicides later?
I'm ready to round this out and move on to the "Next".
...and "No", I won't talk/dwell about it.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:02 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 25, 2014 11:59 PM
Not always, but I do live dangerously
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 26, 2014 12:03 AM (KCxzN)
Close. It was moi. And on Christmas! Better than New Year's Eve I guess.
Posted by: rickb223 at December 26, 2014 12:03 AM (tJipK)
Pale Rider, which Rescue?
Posted by: Adriane the Pagan Holiday of Saturnalia Critic ... at December 26, 2014 12:00 AM (P+IZm)
Lost Fantasy -- they're currently #8.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 12:04 AM (T1005)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 12:04 AM (du6mO)
Dude! I gots that bumper-sticker on the side of my summer-time beer cooler
-Posted by: AltonJackson at December 26, 2014 12:00 AM (KCxzN)
Nice!!! I LOVE that stuff!
*High-Five!*
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:04 AM (16bOT)
Raspy, I'm Italian. If *I* don't call the doctor, I've got body parts that will *do it for me.* ;-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:05 AM (EvYMx)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 26, 2014 12:05 AM (QIrzm)
-Posted by: AltonJackson at December 26, 2014 12:03 AM (KCxzN)
*HAH!*
Livin' on the Edge!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:05 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: rickb223 at December 26, 2014 12:03 AM (tJipK)
Opps. My short term memory don't work so good after a glass of Hennessy.
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 26, 2014 12:05 AM (+XMAD)
Posted by: Adolph at December 26, 2014 12:06 AM (KCxzN)
And, glad to hear it's only 2 liters of that nuclear colon cleanse. Think I'd explode after 4 liters of that stuff.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:06 AM (EvYMx)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise, , , at December 26, 2014 12:06 AM (rsO9D)
-Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 12:04 AM (du6mO)
Thank You, but...
...just Thank You!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:06 AM (16bOT)
"Perhaps.
It seems that every past year becomes the 'Good Old Days'."
-Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 25, 2014 11:57 PM (F2IAQ)
Two close losses and three suicides later?
I'm ready to round this out and move on to the "Next".
...and "No", I won't talk/dwell about it.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:02 AM (16bOT)
If I might suggest something that you could talk or dwell about.....did you ever get a less-blurry pic of this year's lights? You had me lookin' at the screen, lookin' at my glass, lookin' at the screen, lookin' at my glass.....
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 12:06 AM (T1005)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:08 AM (EvYMx)
Posted by: Adriane the Pagan Holiday of Saturnalia Critic ... at December 26, 2014 12:08 AM (P+IZm)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 12:08 AM (rsO9D)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 26, 2014 12:09 AM (RMo/a)
Read the Dave Barry column. Damn he's good. ;-)
And, glad to hear it's only 2 liters of that nuclear colon cleanse. Think I'd explode after 4 liters of that stuff.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:06 AM (EvYMx)
Dude, you explode after the first dose of that stuff....and the schedule says you keep taking more and more and more....
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 12:09 AM (T1005)
It would be great if Obama has developed Al Gore's Curse.
"Obama was unable to golf today at Palm Springs after a freak snowstorm hit..."
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 26, 2014 12:10 AM (+XMAD)
-Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 12:06 AM (T1005)
Nope. I've been quite busy, (as you can imagine), and the lights have been "out" in sections because of rain in N.E. Ohio.
Sure, I've had opportunities, but I need to haul a step-ladder out to the front lawn for stability on that camera.
...maybe tomorrow?
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:10 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:11 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 26, 2014 12:11 AM (QIrzm)
I imagine most folks literally spend the night before their procedure on the toilet.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:11 AM (EvYMx)
It's still Christmas here for a while more.
Whoo! *dances around room*
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 12:12 AM (T1005)
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 26, 2014 12:12 AM (+XMAD)
If you need an extraction I can be there in about 40 minutes.
It's up to you to explain to the in-laws why you're drawing circles on their maps.
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 25, 2014 11:38 PM
LOL, no extraction needed, but thanks for the offer. We left a bit ago for our hotel, wife has a flareup of sciatica and we have tired them out anyways.
Great buffet at noon at their new retirement place. Cheetos and leftovers for supper here, we were stuffed.
Posted by: Farmer at December 26, 2014 12:12 AM (PzqA/)
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 26, 2014 12:12 AM (F2IAQ)
Sorta like Wideawake Island?
Posted by: Ricardo
Sweet dreams, slides ambien thru port to the Rak
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 26, 2014 12:13 AM (RMo/a)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:13 AM (EvYMx)
It was stupid of me to schedule my annual checkup in the middle of the holiday festivities.
Posted by: rickl at December 26, 2014 12:13 AM (sdi6R)
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 26, 2014 12:13 AM (F2IAQ)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 12:13 AM (du6mO)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 26, 2014 12:13 AM (QIrzm)
Trade name: Golytely
Moron name: Colon Blow
Posted by: rickb223 at December 26, 2014 12:14 AM (tJipK)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 26, 2014 12:13 AM (QIrzm)
***
Higher elevations. Not unusual.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 12:15 AM (YNkME)
Posted by: Misanthropic
-------------
Whiner
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 26, 2014 12:12 AM (F2IAQ)
That's Mr. Whiner to you. 3 things on my Xmas list, I get one from the oldest. Pixy and the other 2 didn't come thei. Mrs. MH is a saint
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 26, 2014 12:15 AM (RMo/a)
Yeah. I love Christmas. It was (mostly) a good one this year.
I always felt bad for my cousin Charlie who was born on Christmas though. Tough on him as a kid, his birthday cake and presents were sort of an afterthought.
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 26, 2014 12:15 AM (+XMAD)
Never tried. Mind and body just runs 24/7. Hard to get it to shut down.
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 26, 2014 12:15 AM (QIrzm)
-Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 26, 2014 12:11 AM (QIrzm)
Thanks, Brother. It is All Good. I am truly Blessed.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:15 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 26, 2014 12:16 AM (RMo/a)
Posted by: Michael Mann at December 26, 2014 12:16 AM (F2IAQ)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 12:16 AM (YNkME)
Posted by: rickb223 at December 26, 2014 12:16 AM (tJipK)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:16 AM (16bOT)
cthulhu, yep, that's what I've heard.
I imagine most folks literally spend the night before their procedure on the toilet.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:11 AM (EvYMx)
Pretty much....and that had me punchy enough (from lack of sleep) that the procedure was still a blur, despite being unmedicated.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 12:17 AM (T1005)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:13 AM (EvYMx)
Please do, Steve.
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 26, 2014 12:17 AM (+XMAD)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 26, 2014 12:17 AM (QIrzm)
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 26, 2014 12:17 AM (F2IAQ)
And, glad to hear it's only 2 liters of that nuclear colon cleanse. Think I'd explode after 4 liters of that stuff.
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:06 AM
He is good. & the cleanse is not that bad.
Get it done, Steve. Best thirty minute nap you ever had. I crossed 52 yoa in October; statistically we're the same age. I had mine about three years ago; if you're showing symptoms do it now.
Posted by: Adolph at December 26, 2014 12:18 AM (KCxzN)
-Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 26, 2014 12:17 AM (F2IAQ)
*HAH!*
In the Eighties, we colloquially called that a "rip".
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:18 AM (16bOT)
"If I might suggest something that you could talk or dwell
about.....did you ever get a less-blurry pic of this year's lights? You
had me lookin' at the screen, lookin' at my glass, lookin' at the
screen, lookin' at my glass...."
-Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 12:06 AM (T1005)
Nope. I've been quite busy, (as you can imagine), and the lights have been "out" in sections because of rain in N.E. Ohio.
Sure, I've had opportunities, but I need to haul a step-ladder out to the front lawn for stability on that camera.
...maybe tomorrow?
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:10 AM (16bOT)
I would like to see 'em. It's a great display.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 12:19 AM (T1005)
Gotta get up in 6 so I can pay for those I have oppressed for 200+ years along with our new Dreamer neighbors.
Posted by: RWC at December 26, 2014 12:19 AM (WlUIO)
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 26, 2014 12:19 AM (KCxzN)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:20 AM (16bOT)
-Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 12:19 AM (T1005)
Thanks, Amigo!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:20 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 26, 2014 12:21 AM (RMo/a)
Snow is white,
Holly berries are red,
Time for me,
To go to bed ...
Hope everyone stays healthy.
We're rescheduling the gift giving until family members are better.
Posted by: Adriane the Pagan Holiday of Saturnalia Critic ... at December 26, 2014 12:21 AM (P+IZm)
Posted by: Michael Mann at December 26, 2014 12:16 AM (F2IAQ)
I liked your Earth Band version of Blinded By The Light.
Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at December 26, 2014 12:21 AM (W5DcG)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 12:21 AM (du6mO)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:21 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:22 AM (EvYMx)
Those who had "insider" tickets, please make your way to the window to pick up your winnings.
Posted by: rickb223 at December 26, 2014 12:22 AM (tJipK)
for our hotel, wife has a flareup of sciatica and we have tired them out
anyways.
Great buffet at noon at their new retirement place. Cheetos and leftovers for supper here, we were stuffed.
Good to hear that all is well.
Still, if you need anything, just go to the nearest post office and point to my picture on the wall. They'll know what to do.
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 26, 2014 12:22 AM (UVfht)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 26, 2014 12:23 AM (QIrzm)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 12:23 AM (du6mO)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:23 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at December 26, 2014 12:21 AM (RMo/a)
*Wearily raises hand*
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 12:24 AM (VHKLL)
My wife is. RHIP. Her boss pulled rank.
Posted by: rickb223 at December 26, 2014 12:24 AM (tJipK)
He seems happy, though. And oddly, proud of himself.
Posted by: shredded chi at December 25, 2014 11:47 PM (At6lQ)
When our RayRay gets dogwind, he scares himself with the sound of it. Most dogs do it silently and then act all smug, but not Ray. He blasts it out and then turns around fast to see who poked him in the ass.
Not the sharpest knife in the drawer, but perhaps the smelliest.
Posted by: tcn in AK, almost at December 26, 2014 12:24 AM (g+qqc)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 26, 2014 12:24 AM (QIrzm)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:24 AM (EvYMx)
Yo!
It will "working" from home, as I'll be waiting on the guy to show up and fix the furnace. But I will be logged in and ignoring emails.
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 26, 2014 12:24 AM (UVfht)
Posted by: Adriane the Pagan Holiday of Saturnalia Critic ... at December 26, 2014 12:25 AM (P+IZm)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 12:26 AM (du6mO)
Posted by: Misanthropic
-------------
Mrs. Hammer, back into retail Hell.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 26, 2014 12:26 AM (F2IAQ)
I round-off the number.
I simply know what I have to "do" and "replace" every season.
Merry Christmas!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:28 AM (16bOT)
I grew up in Pennsyltucky (Western PA) and I always wondered why I said 'dude' alot. The internet, what doesn't it know.
Posted by: puddleglum@work at December 26, 2014 12:30 AM (20X6f)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:30 AM (16bOT)
But I'm not planning on staying all day and I'm not going to wear work clothes. I want to be in and out of there as quickly as possible.
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 26, 2014 12:31 AM (+XMAD)
Posted by: Epobirs at December 26, 2014 12:32 AM (IdCqF)
Posted by: Donna &&&&&& V. (handing out sacks of ampersands for Christmas) at December 26, 2014 12:33 AM (+XMAD)
I LOVED the pay at Christmastime!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:33 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:33 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:34 AM (EvYMx)
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 26, 2014 12:36 AM (KCxzN)
http://tinyurl.com/qgxtuu3
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:30 AM (16bOT)
Dude, you missed a spot.
Posted by: tcn in AK, almost at December 26, 2014 12:37 AM (g+qqc)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 12:38 AM (YNkME)
-Posted by: tcn in AK, almost at December 26, 2014 12:37 AM (g+qqc)
*HAH!*
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:38 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 12:39 AM (du6mO)
-Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 12:38 AM (YNkME)
Attack that shit, Brother!!!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:41 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 25, 2014 11:05 PM (EvYMx)
Dude.
Seriously, get to the doc ASAP and if they believe it's a urinary tract infection make sure they do a culture. I almost died from a bladder infection in 2011 that turned into septic shock and put me in ICU for more than two weeks. Things can go south in a matter of hours.
The prep for an endoscopy isn't as horrible as it's often made out to be. The endoscopy itself is a piece of cake.
Posted by: Michael the Hobbit at December 26, 2014 12:43 AM (oWhIO)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 12:43 AM (du6mO)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:43 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:43 AM (16bOT)
I agree.
...and a restaurant-quality use of the word, "dude".
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:45 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: fly gal at December 26, 2014 12:48 AM (pq76f)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:41 AM (16bOT)
*******
Done and done, Slap. Now, just gotta deal with those in my firm that are missed because I, you know, did my job and sold shit, making them have to do all this work and shit over the Holidays.
This was tagged as a Whale target account, and MWNP bagged the freaking whale and took it to da house.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 12:48 AM (YNkME)
Posted by: shredded chi at December 26, 2014 12:52 AM (avC+E)
Those who had "insider" tickets, please make your way to the window to pick up your winnings.
Posted by: rickb223 at December 26, 2014 12:22 AM (tJipK)
Figured that after the emails. The emails were about Obama, something that would only embarass liberal Democrats in the US and would not be in the least scandalous to the rest of the world.
Wife won't be working, but she got laid off two weeks ago. I will be working, but since self employed, I can kind of keep around the house and do my work. Shit, my bidness phone is a cellphone so I'm even working when we go on vacation out of town.
Posted by: Ashley Judds Puffy Scamper at December 26, 2014 12:52 AM (+Fae7)
'Dude' - I blame it entirely on 'Fast Times at Ridgemont High'...., and Dell
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 26, 2014 12:52 AM (F2IAQ)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty
Good job.
It's Christmas everyday if you make it so.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 12:52 AM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: PaleRider, click on my sig and vote for Lost Fantasy daily at December 26, 2014 12:52 AM (7w/kf)
-Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 12:48 AM (YNkME)
*High-Freaking-Five!!!*
You know that I know that you know that I know what you are talking about!
*saves one Warsteiner for MWNP*
Get That Shit, Brother!!!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:52 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:54 AM (EvYMx)
-Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 26, 2014 12:52 AM (F2IAQ)
"Blame?"
...doood.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:54 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 12:54 AM (EvYMx)
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 12:52 AM (wr4LJ)
******
Thanks!
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 12:54 AM (VHKLL)
-Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 12:52 AM (wr4LJ)
*HAH!*
I'd hire you for the Sales-Force-Excellence of blasphemy alone!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:56 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:58 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: PaleRider, click on my sig and vote for Lost Fantasy daily at December 26, 2014 12:58 AM (7w/kf)
*saves one Warsteiner for MWNP*
Get That Shit, Brother!!!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 12:52 AM (16bOT)
*****
"And let me say that if you think you have understood anything I have said today, you are mistaken."
Pretty close to an Alan Greenspan testimony to Congress quote. Same kinda linguistics.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 12:58 AM (rsO9D)
Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 26, 2014 12:59 AM (UVfht)
Merry End of Christmas... ;-)
Posted by: qdpsteve at December 26, 2014 01:00 AM (EvYMx)
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:01 AM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 26, 2014 01:02 AM (KCxzN)
* scurries off to find quote *
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 26, 2014 01:03 AM (F2IAQ)
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:01 AM (wr4LJ)
*******
It's a fortune 100, so could be. I can tell you that this sale and others like it are a large part of MY retirement plan.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:04 AM (rsO9D)
Oh, it's much worse that that
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 26, 2014 01:05 AM (KCxzN)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty
How do we contact the Krampus again?
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:06 AM (wr4LJ)
"To-night!" cried Scrooge.
"To-night at midnight. Hark! The time is drawing near."
The chimes were ringing the three quarters past eleven at that moment.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 26, 2014 01:07 AM (F2IAQ)
Oh, it's much worse that that
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 26, 2014 01:05 AM (KCxzN)
******
Curious about this comment. Do tell.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:09 AM (VHKLL)
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:06 AM (wr4LJ)
*****
You way want to check the context for reasons comments are made just a leetle bit upthread. Or not. Your call.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:11 AM (rsO9D)
I am what I do, saying what I believe to be so at any given moment.
Henceforth, (knowing what I know), I believe you to understand the given facts and reality of such an event.
Far be it from me to explain the nuance of appreciation that you have for your craft.
Given what we know at this juncture, we are prepared to hold you accountable for not signing-up within our well-researched program.
Falling behind is something that everyone else does. We certainly make a note of it.
Being on-board doesn't make you a pioneer of excellence, but it gets you back in the game.
We here at Slapweasel Industries are at the forefront of Bullshit and all its known advantages. We've enjoyed Top-Notch notoriety for our advances in The Field.
Your decision takes you to the Next Level and we are here to advance that.
"Unknown Unknowns" are our specialty.
It was my great pleasure to have hosted your entire entourage. Our pleasure is --simply in satisfying our customers.
Having you aboard lends great credibility to my crew of hard-working individuals. That's what we strive for.
When our bullshit stops being plausible? Well, we've got a problem.
Until that point, we'll produce the sizzle to sell your steak.
We guarantee that here at Slapweasel Industries.
-That.
...Is What We Do.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:14 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty
It was a joke. Merry Christmas.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:15 AM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:16 AM (16bOT)
G'night all.
Posted by: Mike Hammer, etc., etc. at December 26, 2014 01:18 AM (F2IAQ)
-Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:15 AM (wr4LJ)
*HAH!*
Once again, someone mistakes weft cut-loop for a douchebag when he's clearly just being a dick!
*HAH!*
Love you, Brother!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:19 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:19 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:09 AM
OK. Hyperbole on my part. Guilty as charged, Your Honor. I just can't see a way out of this that does'nt see loss of life & massive property damage.
I hate to go all "Herman Wouk" on you peeps, but there it is.
Posted by: AltonJackson at December 26, 2014 01:20 AM (KCxzN)
Posted by: ColdBeer1
Peace on Earth and Goodwill toward all Mankind.
*Best of the Season to you and yours, Slappy.*
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:22 AM (wr4LJ)
-Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:06 AM (wr4LJ)
Like you haven't gotten your ass whooped by that sack-holding fiend.
I'm onto you, you know.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:23 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:15 AM (wr4LJ)
*******
Now understood. Thanks and a Merry Christmas back to you as well.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:24 AM (rsO9D)
-Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:22 AM (wr4LJ)
Disregard that last statement!
Wishing you All The Best, weft!
Stay Blessed and Brilliant!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:25 AM (16bOT)
I'm onto you, you know.
Posted by: ColdBeer1
No, I've never been held captive.
Except for that time in band camp ...
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:28 AM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: buzzion at December 26, 2014 01:29 AM (zt+N6)
We truly are all diverse and stuff.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:30 AM (YNkME)
Merry Christmas to you and yours. Sideways, with a gift-wrapped pineapple, of course!
/snark
Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX
Posted by: Jim at December 26, 2014 01:31 AM (RzZOc)
Posted by: buzzion at December 26, 2014 01:33 AM (zt+N6)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:33 AM (rsO9D)
There is a "craft beer" ingredients store near me that sells for about 90% of what they want for ingredients on Amazon.
I'd been drunkenly doing conversions from ml to oz and I'd given-up three hours ago.
My laziness seems to be your problem now.
*hic*
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:34 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: rabidfox at December 26, 2014 01:35 AM (COIkl)
Posted by: Jim
Bles'd art thou amoung us who see fit to repeat our names in posts.
And bles'd art thou amoung us who love pineapple to the point of a fetish.
Aaa~ aa~~~ menn*
*new catholic hymnal. Yeah, I know! Weird!
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:35 AM (wr4LJ)
*hic*
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:34 AM (16bOT)
*Stomps foot and points wildly!!!!!*
See? This is how we got where we are now! See?!
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:37 AM (VHKLL)
You shouldn't feed your dog fat. If not for the health, alone?
...for the fact that you'll be cleaning-up puddles of shit.
I'm talking about large amounts of fat during the Holidays. When that occurs most-often.
Don't do it.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:39 AM (16bOT)
-Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:37 AM (VHKLL)
Whut?
That's Retarded, Sir.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:40 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:42 AM (16bOT)
That's Retarded, Sir.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:40 AM (16bOT)
******
It was a joke riff on the FSA and......ehhh, never mind. If ya gotta explain it, it doesn't work. My bad.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:42 AM (YNkME)
-Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:42 AM (YNkME)
*HAH!*
C'mon...
Sincerely,
Racheal Jenteal
P.S.: Stop writing in cursive.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:44 AM (16bOT)
Wow, an ONT that ranges from talk about trouble peeing, urethras,
colonoscopies and prostate troubles to the age old fight between Sales
and Operations.
We truly are all diverse and stuff.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:30 AM (YNkME)
*Ahem*
And, weighing in from the beancounting brigade....salesmen are generally assholes -- but when they're landing the whales that make the place profitable, they're OUR assholes and shall be cherished and protected accordingly.
And, BTW, congrats. It sounds like you're giving the right kind of bother to the ops guys.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 01:45 AM (T1005)
Racheal Jenteal
P.S.: Stop writing in cursive.
Posted by: ColdBeer1
This calls for an Official Federal Joke License!
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:45 AM (wr4LJ)
This is A Thing, are you listenin'?
Who the hell, is Charlie Gibson?
Plush versus Hardwood
I'd say it's All Good
Bounding through Ace's Wonderland.
Gone away is the old Troll
'Cause we tore, him a new asshole
He sucks cock by choice
Just one of our Toys
Bouncin' 'round through Ace's Wonderland.
On the lake the canoe had a problem
Lost my Mossberg and AR 15
Horde will ask if everything's okay, man.
The Val-U-Rite will make a better scene.
Later on, we'll conspire
As the Progs start the fire
They think they have balls,
But they're first 'Gainst the Wall
Sloshin' 'round through Ace's Wonderland.
In the basement we can build a shelter.
Stock it full of goodies, guns and gold.
When all the shit goes fucking Helter-Skelter
The idiots will do as they are told.
But by our Faith, As God is Willing
There will be no more killing
We frolic and play; The Moron Horde Way
Enjoying...
Life in Ace's...
Wonder-laaaaaaaaaaand!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:46 AM (16bOT)
-Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:45 AM (wr4LJ)
Yup. Moar Federal.
*stamp*
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:47 AM (16bOT)
Hey... has anyone tried brewing their own beer? I've got a bead on a
"Mr. Beer" two-gallon kit that looks pretty cool for fifty bucks.
There is a "craft beer" ingredients store near me that sells for about 90% of what they want for ingredients on Amazon.
I'd been drunkenly doing conversions from ml to oz and I'd given-up three hours ago.
My laziness seems to be your problem now.
*hic*
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:34 AM (16bOT)
I have brewed my own beer on numerous occasions -- at BOP (Brew On Premises) shops. I'm setting up to do it at home, but keep getting interrupted.
The elephant in the room is portioning it out. Bottling is a huge pain-in-the-ass, and kegging requires a bit of investment up front and lots of customization. I'm going with kegging, but haven't gotten the parts to work right, yet.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 01:49 AM (T1005)
-Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 01:49 AM (T1005)
Roger That.
Thanks!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:50 AM (16bOT)
Wonder-laaaaaaaaaaand!
Posted by: ColdBeer1
The neighbors asked me to shut up after the first stanza ...
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:53 AM (wr4LJ)
"The elephant in the room is portioning it out. Bottling is a huge
pain-in-the-ass, and kegging requires a bit of investment up front and
lots of customization. I'm going with kegging, but haven't gotten the
parts to work right, yet."
-Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 01:49 AM (T1005)
Roger That.
Thanks!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:50 AM (16bOT)
There is a thing called a "Corney-keg" -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cornelius_keg -- that is an important part of understanding your options.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 01:53 AM (T1005)
-Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 01:53 AM (wr4LJ)
#1. They Suck.
#2. Close your windows.
#3. There is no Three.
#4. Enjoy!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 01:55 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 01:45 AM (T1005)
******
While I am mildly bothered by the most Salesmen are assholes characterization, Merry Christmas and all that. Is it because the ops and accounting hates our projects but loves them them their paychecks that stem from them and stuff, or what? The Chicken and the egg how does that all work?
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:55 AM (rsO9D)
*HAH!*
#1. Literally half of my life has been sales!
#2. Who said that you were an asshole?
#3. You are the chicken. You allow those fucking "eggs" to Get Laid.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:00 AM (16bOT)
I have brewed my own beer on numerous occasions -- at BOP (Brew On Premises) shops. I'm setting up to do it at home, but keep getting interrupted.
The elephant in the room is portioning it out. Bottling is a huge pain-in-the-ass, and kegging requires a bit of investment up front and lots of customization. I'm going with kegging, but haven't gotten the parts to work right, yet.
Posted by: cthulhu
Ok, i want to do a small batch: half-assed copper tubing to cool a boiled malt, or just dump two half-gallon, frozen water jugs into the cooling wort? Which is easier?
*I'm sure that makes no sense*
Can I ignore the stupid ass cooling methods if i just put a lid on everything?
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:01 AM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:01 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:02 AM (VHKLL)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:05 AM (YNkME)
-Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:01 AM (wr4LJ)
The original question was, "Is Mr. Beer worth fifty bucks?"
I can't find the damned link, now. I'm a little tipsy.
...okay. I'm wasted.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:08 AM (16bOT)
colonoscopies and prostate troubles to the age old fight between Sales
and Operations.
We truly are all diverse and stuff.
There's a vas deferens between the commenters here and those at other blogs.
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2014 02:09 AM (842Ha)
-Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:05 AM (YNkME)
*HAH!*
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:09 AM (16bOT)
-Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2014 02:09 AM (842Ha)
Piss and cum... hmmm...
Unbecoming characterization, my humble opinion beholds.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:11 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: garrett at December 26, 2014 02:09 AM (842Ha)
*****
I wouldn't know much about that, so I will bow to your experience in this area.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:11 AM (rsO9D)
Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:12 AM (AbfZY)
Posted by: andycanuck
Me thinks, Sirrah, you're just trolling the AoSHQ now. d
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:14 AM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:14 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:16 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:17 AM (AbfZY)
Holy shit, my new phone will not shut the fcuk up about the fact that,is
fully charged. Kinda like my Ex, but she meant our credit card."
OMG LOL
Posted by: Cowboy at December 26, 2014 02:18 AM (HHYLh)
Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:18 AM (AbfZY)
-Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:18 AM (AbfZY)
Unless you cram lube into your urethra and vas defrens?
-No.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:20 AM (16bOT)
"Fixed".
Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:17 AM (AbfZY)
****
I have no idea where you're going with this, but enjoy the ride.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:20 AM (VHKLL)
Posted by: andycanuck
Wow, eh. That's far beyond Molson drunk.
That's Canadian Pisk drunk.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:21 AM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:21 AM (16bOT)
-Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:20 AM (VHKLL)
"That's Canadian Pisk drunk."
-Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:21 AM (wr4LJ)
I'm quite drunk and I Agree.
..."X" gets the Square.
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:24 AM (16bOT)
-Posted by: andycanuck
You See Men where he's going ...
or coming
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:25 AM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: Cowboy at December 26, 2014 02:26 AM (HHYLh)
or coming."
-Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:25 AM (wr4LJ)
That horribly stupid "joke" is a "beatable" offense.
Stop falling into that pattern! Pull-Up! PULL... UP!!!
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:27 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: Cowboy
Apparently owned by the US Molson Coors Brewing Company.
Soory, eh.
Then again, just be glad it isn't owned by a Russian sub.
Yet.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:30 AM (wr4LJ)
Whatever happened to Moslon Golden? It was a great beer in the day,
but it just dropped off the map. Haven't had one in about 15 years. Used
to have them all the time. Memories!
Posted by: Cowboy
Apparently owned by the US Molson Coors Brewing Company.
Soory, eh.
Then again, just be glad it isn't owned by a Russian sub.
Yet.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:30 AM (wr4LJ)
===still in some stores where I am.
Posted by: jc at December 26, 2014 02:31 AM (iRJ+A)
Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:32 AM (CSXsy)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:32 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:32 AM (CSXsy)
-Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:32 AM (CSXsy)
(CDRnK)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:34 AM (16bOT)
And, BTW, congrats. It sounds like you're giving the right kind of bother to the ops guys.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 01:45 AM (T1005)
******
While I am mildly bothered by the most Salesmen are assholes
characterization, Merry Christmas and all that. Is it because the ops
and accounting hates our projects but loves them them their paychecks
that stem from them and stuff, or what? The Chicken and the egg how does
that all work?
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 01:55 AM (rsO9D)
Ah, let me count the ways.....
First, as a personal note, I have to acknowledge that I was quite hostile to you a while back but as you've been Moron-ing on about things I've been warming to you....which is why I'd be so frank.
Let's start with something easy -- a couple of years ago, someone did an analysis and found that there were 180 accounting rules to determine whether something could be claimed as revenue on a financial statement. Doubtless, there are more now. Many of these rules involve bundling or implied obligations which are not necessarily on POs or in revenue contracts, but have significant consequences regardless. And, here's the shiny part -- if subsequent events show that revenue was overstated, this is not called "whoopsie", it's called "accounting fraud."
So the world we live in has us bothering sales guys for nitpicking details about stuff that happened weeks ago.....which can lead to loss of employment, criminal charges, loss of reputation or certification, SEC sanctions, and other fun FOR US -- and we keep getting blown-off, lied-to, half-assed, and shitted-on for having the temerity to ask.
Sales guys want to stay sloppy to make the deal happen; accountants need to thread the needle to avoid being nuked.
And, then, from the ops side of things.....I actually ran the ops for company that did analog video transmission....and that's where this story comes from.
So, the decibel (db) is a logarithmic scale that doubles every 3 db. A 12 db siren is twice as loud as a 9 db siren.
So if you have a link that has 65 db signal-to-noise (A->B), then you put it into another link that has 65 db signal-to-noise (B->C), it is mathematically impossible that the total link (A->C) can be any better than 62 db signal-to-noise. You got some noise on the first link and some on the second, and twice the noise is 3 db.
So, just imagine everyone's dismay when a winning design bid included a 63 db two-hop link. Yay! We got the PO!!!
On the flip side of this, accounting and ops both recognize that you have to knock doors and get 'em slammed, look in the mirror every night after a day of refusals and go pitch some more in the morning. If we were up for the task, we'd probably be doing it -- it pays better.
But when it comes to staying on the straight-and-narrow or making the shit work, we generally get a ration of prima-donna crap. And that's the biggest half of why salesmen are considered assholes.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 02:34 AM (T1005)
Posted by: Cowboy at December 26, 2014 02:34 AM (HHYLh)
Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:32 AM (CSXsy)
******
Mine earlier was YnkMe. More of a taunt, really.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:35 AM (VHKLL)
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:37 AM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:37 AM (CSXsy)
Posted by: Cowboy at December 26, 2014 02:38 AM (HHYLh)
Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:38 AM (CSXsy)
I have brewed my own beer on numerous occasions -- at BOP (Brew On
Premises) shops. I'm setting up to do it at home, but keep getting
interrupted.
The elephant in the room is portioning it out. Bottling is a huge
pain-in-the-ass, and kegging requires a bit of investment up front and
lots of customization. I'm going with kegging, but haven't gotten the
parts to work right, yet.
Posted by: cthulhu
Ok, i want to do a small batch: half-assed copper tubing to cool a
boiled malt, or just dump two half-gallon, frozen water jugs into the
cooling wort? Which is easier?
*I'm sure that makes no sense*
Can I ignore the stupid ass cooling methods if i just put a lid on everything?
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:01 AM (wr4LJ)
My dad was doing batches of beer in a tarpaper shack in the early 50's. He did not own a wort-chiller. Beer is the oldest known beverage, predating wine -- the Assyrians didn't have wort-chillers, either. You just have to accept that a brew will go sour sometimes and keep going.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 02:38 AM (T1005)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:38 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:41 AM (wr4LJ)
straight-and-narrow or making the shit work, we generally get a ration
of prima-donna crap. And that's the biggest half of why salesmen are
considered assholes.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 02:34 AM (T1005)
===and yet, all members of your team are selling at all times. some are making positive sales, some are making neutral sales, and some are making negative sales.
Huh? If I call your accounts payable and get a ration of shit -- that's a negative sale. If your receptionist is an absolute ditz, that's a negative sale -- unless she is gorgeous and has big tits. In which case it is overruled by the big tits rule. You get the idea.
doctors who sell well are richer than doctors that don't -- and lawyers, and engineers, and accountants, and everybody else. sales skills always matter.
Posted by: jc at December 26, 2014 02:42 AM (iRJ+A)
Let me translate cthulhu's post for you: Salesmen Overpromise.
Posted by: Cowboy at December 26, 2014 02:38 AM (HHYLh)
Let me clarify slightly -- salesman can say shit that put other people's ass on the line.....then, when shit comes down, they get a free pass because the other folks should have been looking out for problems, 'cause, y'know -- salesmen are blameless amoral idiots.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 02:43 AM (T1005)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:43 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 02:34 AM (T1005)
*******
I have a different perspective, having until very recently acted as the Project Manager on every piece of business I sold. The reason the Whale died in this case is that the Hunter knew WTF he was talking about, and that said Hunter did not sell the dream in order that a group of someones may live the nightmare.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:43 AM (VHKLL)
Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:44 AM (CSXsy)
Posted by: ColdBeer1 (Slap) (T) at December 26, 2014 02:44 AM (16bOT)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 02:44 AM (du6mO)
Posted by: andycanuck at December 26, 2014 02:45 AM (CSXsy)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 02:46 AM (du6mO)
Posted by: Cowboy at December 26, 2014 02:47 AM (HHYLh)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 02:47 AM (du6mO)
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 02:43 AM (T1005)
********
Hasty generalizations are never a good idea. Here, you are covering yourself in them. If you want to relate specific experiences, cool. To dis an entire classification of people who make the sale to pay those such as you that then whine about those who are charged by job description with doing this, way not cool.
Shorter version...Without us, you wouldn't have a fucking job. Get over yourselves.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:51 AM (rsO9D)
Posted by: andycanuck
Bluegrass is supreme musicality.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at December 26, 2014 02:52 AM (wr4LJ)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 02:52 AM (du6mO)
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:51 AM (rsO9D)
*****
Just wanted to repeat that, as I am out. Gotta go make the cash that accounting will then hitch about us spending to make the cash.... Rinse and repeat. Enjoy the jobs we provide, and Merry Christmas. I am sure a response will be forthcoming when you are sure nobody will be awake to read it.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:59 AM (YNkME)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 03:00 AM (du6mO)
No doubt exists about the utility of a good salesman. My dad was one. He
was actually considered a legend in his field (contract furniture,
fwiw). Companies pay big money for a good one, and rightly so. But
that's only because the norm is so woeful. A good salesman is a couple
standard deviations above the rest, and you're just not likely to
encounter them much.
Posted by: Cowboy at December 26, 2014 02:47 AM (HHYLh)
Having performed several roles within operations and accounting and executive management....there are natural tensions. The fact that accounting eats-it when sales are misstated -- when most cases arise from undisclosed sales terms.....yeah, that's a big problem. The fact that accounting staff have to comply with a myriad of accounting and tax regulations with criminal consequences when sales-guys half-ass their expense reports....yeah, that's a problem.
But, seriously, there is all sorts of room to work together. Accounting departments leak like sieves -- if you're a sales guy, ask 'em how much profit you bring to the company....and bring that to your next annual review. Ask 'em which of your deals were most profitable, and highlight those. Ask 'em which issues their auditors are sniffing over, and resolve to make those squeaky-clean in future deals -- they'll love you.
Don't just throw a bunch of crap at 'em for expense reports -- organize it, and ask 'em for how well it was organized, and do better next time.....yours will start flying through.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 03:00 AM (T1005)
Shorter version...Without us, you wouldn't have a fucking job. Get over yourselves.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:51 AM (rsO9D)
*****
Just wanted to repeat that, as I am out. Gotta go make the cash that
accounting will then hitch about us spending to make the cash.... Rinse
and repeat. Enjoy the jobs we provide, and Merry Christmas. I am sure a
response will be forthcoming when you are sure nobody will be awake to
read it.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:59 AM (YNkME)
===before I thought Cooth was being unfair. Now, not so much. Now you do sound like the kind of an ass that gets other people's licenses yanked or worst case sent to prison.
Posted by: jc at December 26, 2014 03:03 AM (iRJ+A)
Let me clarify slightly -- salesman can say shit that put other people's
ass on the line.....then, when shit comes down, they get a free pass
because the other folks should have been looking out for problems,
'cause, y'know -- salesmen are blameless amoral idiots.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 02:43 AM (T1005)
********
Hasty generalizations are never a good idea. Here, you are covering
yourself in them. If you want to relate specific experiences, cool. To
dis an entire classification of people who make the sale to pay those
such as you that then whine about those who are charged by job
description with doing this, way not cool.
Shorter version...Without us, you wouldn't have a fucking job. Get over yourselves.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:51 AM (rsO9D)
There's nothing hasty about it. The first refuge of an asshole salesman is to say "without us, you wouldn't have a fucking job." Get over that. You had me half-convinced you could be better.
I don't want to hold you as a blameless amoral idiot.....but that's the way the rules go. How about you are an essential part of the process -- the same way the compliance guys and the delivery guys are essential parts of the process.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 03:08 AM (T1005)
My brother is thinking of collecting works by my favorite author, Ian V. Hogg.
Posted by: Ed Anger at December 26, 2014 03:08 AM (RcpcZ)
521
Shorter version...Without us, you wouldn't have a fucking job. Get over yourselves.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:51 AM (rsO9D)
*****
Just wanted to repeat that, as I am out. Gotta go make the cash that
accounting will then hitch about us spending to make the cash.... Rinse
and repeat. Enjoy the jobs we provide, and Merry Christmas. I am sure a
response will be forthcoming when you are sure nobody will be awake to
read it.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 02:59 AM (YNkME)
===before
I thought Cooth was being unfair. Now, not so much. Now you do sound
like the kind of an ass that gets other people's licenses yanked or
worst case sent to prison.
Posted by: jc at December 26, 2014 03:03 AM (iRJ+A)
You can tell when I start to respect you when I start being honest. I was starting to respect MWNP. That may have been a mistake.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 03:14 AM (T1005)
Nice shooting Ahab!
Posted by: bill-o at December 26, 2014 03:17 AM (AWwDY)
start being honest. I was starting to respect MWNP. That may have been a
mistake.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 03:14 AM (T1005)
---he's missing the most important point -- do the books for a while, and one usually finds that the real money is in repeat customers.
one pays great sales people to get 1st-time customers. one needs 1st-time customers to get repeat customers. but repeat customers only happen if the whole team gets it done.
Lying can get a 1st-time customer. Lying doesn't retain those customers -- performance does.
Posted by: jc at December 26, 2014 03:21 AM (iRJ+A)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 03:24 AM (du6mO)
This was tagged as a Whale target account, and MWNP bagged the freaking whale and took it to da house.
Nice shooting Ahab!
Posted by: bill-o at December 26, 2014 03:17 AM (AWwDY)
It's one thing to claim a whale....it's quite another to have it tied down so that your accounting staff can record it without going to jail themselves, and have it contractually obligated to pay if the laws of physics remain unbroken.
Posted by: cthulhu at December 26, 2014 03:24 AM (T1005)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 03:26 AM (du6mO)
http://tinyurl.com/qgxtuu3
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 03:26 AM (du6mO)
===
http://youtu.be/inWKw8nqQlI
Posted by: jc at December 26, 2014 03:32 AM (iRJ+A)
Posted by: jc at December 26, 2014 03:35 AM (iRJ+A)
Be well all you Morons.
Posted by: Farmer at December 26, 2014 03:37 AM (PzqA/)
http://tinyurl.com/qgxtuu3
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 03:26 AM (du6mO)
===
http://youtu.be/inWKw8nqQlI
A classic
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 03:39 AM (du6mO)
Posted by: Infidel at December 26, 2014 03:42 AM (du6mO)
1. Use a reputable site like Download.com (part of C/Net).
2. Always, always, always choose the custom install option. This how you get the opportunity to turn down offers to install various tool bars and other crap.
Posted by: Epobirs at December 26, 2014 03:50 AM (IdCqF)
missed because I, you know, did my job and sold shit, making them have
to do all this work and shit over the Holidays.
This was tagged as a Whale target account, and MWNP bagged the freaking whale and took it to da house.
Posted by: ManWithNoParty, unperson from Free Market Jesus Paradise at December 26, 2014 12:48 AM (YNkME)"
I've usually been on the other end of those transactions. This bit of classic movie fare sums it up pretty well, especially starting around the 3 minute mark.
http://youtu.be/FcsXC2xFis4
Posted by: Obnoxious A-Hole at December 26, 2014 03:59 AM (PD6iL)
one pays great sales people to get 1st-time customers. one needs 1st-time customers to get repeat customers. but repeat customers only happen if the whole team gets it done.
Lying can get a 1st-time customer. Lying doesn't retain those customers -- performance does.
Posted by: jc at December 26, 2014 03:21 AM (iRJ+A)
That is sooo fucking nuts on.
Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at December 26, 2014 04:00 AM (FMbng)
Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde, NC Chapter at December 26, 2014 04:36 AM (6fyGz)
Posted by: Tina at December 26, 2014 04:43 AM (nrjyf)
Posted by: bill-o at December 26, 2014 04:45 AM (AWwDY)
Putting on my prognostication hat I'd like to say that inevitably it will come up that a former employee did this and DPRK was used as a political and business expedient.
Issa ama GOP. Issa leet. Gundam army hack ussa. All ursa base belong to ussa.
Posted by: bestie21 at December 26, 2014 05:13 AM (rRNvn)
Posted by: bestie21 at December 26, 2014 05:15 AM (rRNvn)
Posted by: m at December 26, 2014 05:17 AM (G891H)
Yep. You need a big pot (I got a deal on a lobster pot) a carboy, and a 5 gallon bucket, a plug with a hole for the carboy, a lid with a hole for the bucket and one or more airlocks.
I did this for a while in an apartment no less so I'll give some free fucking advise.
Avoid glass. Glass just breaks. Get a plastic carboy or just use a water bottle from those office water coolers. I talked a secretary into just letting me take one. Plastic soda bottles are actually great beer bottles. Starting out you're very likely to bottle too soon. I made one hell of a mess one time with glass bottles when they exploded. Plastic PVC bottles will expand with the pressure. They are really hard to pop. If you drink a lot of soda or bottled water like I do then they are free and available.
Get some Oxyclean preferably without soap if you can find it. Sodium percarbonate is the main ingredient and is also a commercial grade cleaner used in the food industry. It's also what they'll sell you at a premium at the brewing store. I cleaned all my equipment in the bathtub. First removing all foreign matter. Then wash with a mild bleach solution. Finally with oxiclean and water. My ex actually loved it because the tub was sparkling clean and I never had a batch go lambic or fail to brew.
Stick to store bought malt until you get the hang of things. Sparging can be tricky. I made a water cooler lauter tun at one point. I had a couple of good batches making my own malt (after getting the basics down) but then had some stuck sparges. Stuck sparges suck and will turn you off to the whole thing if it happens before you get your confidence.
Posted by: bestie21 at December 26, 2014 05:46 AM (rRNvn)
"---he's missing the most important point -- do the books for a while, and one usually finds that the real money is in repeat customers."
Thats just crazy talk.
/sarc
As in most industries, ask the guys in accounting and they will tell you 30% of the customers usually drive 70-80% of annual sales. I find it amusing when the sales team promises 10% organic growth-- that is a rarity-- as most growth is done with old relationships or acquisitions.
Posted by: Buckeye Abroad at December 26, 2014 06:47 AM (wtMIn)
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 26, 2014 06:57 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 26, 2014 06:58 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: Stringer Davis at December 26, 2014 07:00 AM (xq1UY)
Well, I'll repeat this one about Talullah Bankhead: it seems she was giving a party (when wasn't she?) and one of the guests was Burgess Meredith, who was pleasantly surprised when the hostess greeted him at the door stark naked.
As the party went on, Meredith watched guests drink, indulge in illicit drugs and pair off to secluded bedrooms. At last, Bankhead approached him, confessing that she felt "the grand urge" herself, and woudn't he help a lady in distress?
Ever the gentleman, Meredith accompanied Bankhead to bed. They went at it hammer and tong and were having a wonderful time, when the climax of the encounter was near. . .
"For God's sake, don't come inside me!" Bankhead shouted. "I'm engaged!"
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 26, 2014 07:05 AM (zF6Iw)
Has anyone heard whether Choom Boy got his Christmas goose from Reggie?
Posted by: MrScribbler at December 26, 2014 07:11 AM (yAC3X)
Posted by: please dont squeeze the soothie at December 26, 2014 07:15 AM (XK/4h)
One of my faves is still the story of Sam Goldwyn walking on the beach with a friend. The friend looked up and said, "look at the gulls, Sam!" Whereupon Goldwyn replied, "how do you know they're not boys?"
Posted by: MrScribbler at December 26, 2014 07:17 AM (yAC3X)
Posted by: please dont squeeze the soothie at December 26, 2014 07:15 AM
I hope teh Vicmeister is saving his ammo for the new thread....
Perhaps someone knows how he's doing. Building up for the big reveal, so to speak....
Hope he's doing okay.
Posted by: MrScribbler at December 26, 2014 07:20 AM (yAC3X)
All the cob-loggers must have the day off.
Well,until the thread, here's today's Ziegfeld Girl, the limpid Dolores Costello:
http://goo.gl/G4yX8A
http://goo.gl/Tkyu0v
She was once known as "The Goddess of the Silent Screen," but is better known today as the grandmother of Drew Barrymore. She was also, as a teenager, the favorite model of the illustrator James Montgomery Flagg (he of the "Uncle Sam Needs You" poster).
While on the road tour of George White's Scandals of 1922 she and her sister Helene were offered movie contracts by Warner Brothers. A languid beauty, Costello generally played patrician beauties, such as Isabel in The Magnificent Ambersons]/i] and "Dearest" in Little Lord Fauntleroy. Her film career, sadly, was ruined by the caustic effects of early movie makeup, which ravaged her face too severely to disguise. Married to John Barrymore, the two were together for seven years before Barrymore's drinking and whoring ruined the couple's relationship.
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 26, 2014 07:27 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 26, 2014 07:28 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: Mama AJ at December 26, 2014 07:34 AM (0xTsz)
It's not officially "morning" 'til Vic says it is....
Hope you get a nice warm day when the sun comes up there. It's 41 here, which is Too Damn Cold.
The kind of day when I need Dolores Costello wrapped around me to ward off the chills.
Posted by: MrScribbler at December 26, 2014 07:40 AM (yAC3X)
Posted by: Grey Fox at December 26, 2014 07:40 AM (FG1UN)
Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 26, 2014 07:43 AM (JC1sv)
Hello from Way Down Here and Boxing Day is almost over for another year
In 15 minutes it will be just plain old Saturday....
Also today, Boxing Day, was the anniversary of the tsunami which killed over 250,000 people from Indonesia to Thailand to Sri Lanka...
http://goo.gl/d88SYs
Posted by: aussie at December 26, 2014 07:44 AM (b/1aA)
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 26, 2014 07:46 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: Ricardo Kill at December 26, 2014 07:46 AM (MMWhx)
It's 49 here. Our highs over the next week will range from 64 to 43. We might have thunderstorms for the Independence Bowl tomorrow.
And yes, of course the coldest day is when we have to get out early to go over the river and to the ENT.
('take the girl to the doc', I mean, but that doesn't sound as silly)
I'm wide awake not thanks to coffee but thanks to the cats who knocked over a LEGO box and made it sound like the Vikings were invading.
Posted by: Mama AJ at December 26, 2014 07:47 AM (0xTsz)
I like being able to actually read what you folks have to say without straining to do it.
Posted by: teej says go K-State at December 26, 2014 07:48 AM (jGqoT)
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 26, 2014 07:50 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: teej says go K-State at December 26, 2014 07:48 AM
Have you tried Dulcolax?
Posted by: MrScribbler at December 26, 2014 07:50 AM (yAC3X)
What do you do for Boxing Day?
>>In 15 minutes it will be just plain old Saturday....
Well, you can be the first to start celebrating my daughter's birthday!
Posted by: Mama AJ at December 26, 2014 07:50 AM (0xTsz)
Posted by: teej says go K-State at December 26, 2014 07:52 AM (jGqoT)
Rephrasing thanks to Twitter that doesn't want me to copy and paste.
https://twitter.com/rsmccain/status/548261201705455616
Nerf World.
I like that.
And if one were to use it to describe feminists, they would probably be upset about the male shooty-ness* on top of it.
*to use the technical term
Posted by: Mama AJ at December 26, 2014 07:54 AM (0xTsz)
Posted by: teej says go K-State at December 26, 2014 07:54 AM (jGqoT)
Posted by: teej says go K-State at December 26, 2014 07:52 AM
It's early. What do you expect? I think there's a federal law against laughing before 8 AM.
Posted by: MrScribbler at December 26, 2014 07:55 AM (yAC3X)
570 Mama AJ
Hi there, and we spent Boxing Day lying around doing nothing but watching the cricket and the start of the Sydney to Hobart yacht race, and tonight having a few drinkies or three/four/five....
Of course, the place is a mess - because we stayed elsewhere for Christmas Day I haven't unpacked or moved the presents scattered around
One of the kitties is sleeping inside a Santa sack which was just dumped on the floor
Happy Birthday to your dear daughter! Aussie greetings to her from far away...
Posted by: aussie at December 26, 2014 07:56 AM (b/1aA)
http://tinyurl.com/l7gtu6p
To spend time with friends.
After soul-searching, he says.
Posted by: Mama AJ at December 26, 2014 07:57 AM (0xTsz)
Dude doesn't want to be a stage prop for Choom Boy and Mooooo-chelle? Refreshing; I wish Congress and all the regular invitees for the SotU would take the hint and do likewise.
Personally, I could not sit there and listen to the Mocha Messiah running his lying mouth. Can't even watch him to the teevee.
Posted by: MrScribbler at December 26, 2014 08:03 AM (yAC3X)
90% of our clients are Canadian. And Canada is closed today.
The moose out front should have told my bosses.
Posted by: Citizen X-mas at December 26, 2014 08:05 AM (7ObY1)
>>Now, with oil nowhere in sight of returning to $100+ highs, the country's ability to repay foreign debts is coming under serious doubt. Standard & Poor's recently said there is a 50% chance it would downgrade Russian bonds to "junk" status. Even Peru and Botswana have higher credit ratings than that.
LegalInsurrection.com
Posted by: Mama AJ at December 26, 2014 08:06 AM (0xTsz)
Pity he couldn't say, "I'll wait until an American is C-in-C," but military code and all of that.
Still, he's got a whopper of an IRS audit coming his way.
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 26, 2014 08:06 AM (zF6Iw)
>>Now, with oil nowhere in sight of returning to $100+ highs, the country's ability to repay foreign debts is coming under serious doubt. Standard & Poor's recently said there is a 50% chance it would downgrade Russian bonds to "junk" status. Even Peru and Botswana have higher credit ratings than that.
Looks like Vlad should have been diversifying the economic base rather than leveraging it for empire.
Posted by: --- at December 26, 2014 08:08 AM (MMC8r)
Thank you! She'll think that's pretty cool.
>>One of the kitties is sleeping inside a Santa sack which was just dumped on the floor
I put a pic up on twitter of one of our cats involved in some Christmas bird watching.
https://twitter.com/MamaAJ123/status/548200005107220480
Posted by: Mama AJ at December 26, 2014 08:09 AM (0xTsz)
doubt. Standard Poor's recently said there is a 50% chance it
would downgrade Russian bonds to "junk" status. Even Peru and Botswana
have higher credit ratings than that.
If S ampersand P was blinded by Choom Love, they could say the same about the U.S.
I have no love for Russia, but in many respects their situation is really no worse than ours. We just hide it better....
Posted by: MrScribbler at December 26, 2014 08:11 AM (yAC3X)
http://goo.gl/cGdsvV
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 26, 2014 08:11 AM (zF6Iw)
Mitch Daniels has cut costs at Perdue
>>Daniels achieved the tuition freeze in part by postponing raises for some administrators, and some faculty members volunteered to forgo raises as well. Information-technology consolidation, bulk purchasing, eliminating off-campus storage, disposing of surplus property, and improving cash management also contribute--all techniques from Daniels's playbook as governor. The former Indiana governor's efforts to control costs have attracted national attention.
What a concept!
Posted by: Mama AJ at December 26, 2014 08:12 AM (0xTsz)
Posted by: MrScribbler at December 26, 2014 08:14 AM (yAC3X)
It's a bright medium yellow, kind of like slightly watered-down Limoncello in color.
The taste is more like a strong liqueur than a wine. And I do mean strong. One glass gives you a buzz. Two and you're getting toasted. So, pretty powerful for wine.
It's not at all bitter. Just kind of fruity with a strong liqueur-ish taste, that's the best way I can describe it.
We used Euell Gibbons' recipe from his classic wild-foods book "Stalking the Wild Asparagus."
All in all, I enjoyed making it, and I will enjoy drinking it this winter. Every glass is like a little taste of summer in the winter.
Posted by: Citizen X-mas at December 26, 2014 08:14 AM (7ObY1)
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 26, 2014 08:15 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: dogfish at December 26, 2014 08:16 AM (BZOhi)
+ Me. Hoping to see some golfers after the pitiful December weather we've had. Forecast high of 61 and clear today.
Posted by: Golfman in NC at December 26, 2014 08:19 AM (8ufJT)
Posted by: Grey Fox at December 26, 2014 08:19 AM (FG1UN)
Posted by: dogfish at December 26, 2014 08:20 AM (BZOhi)
I foresee many form letters being generated today.
Posted by: Kindltot at December 26, 2014 08:20 AM (t//F+)
Old Martin and a Mandolin
Daddy made it through the big one
Home in 45
A photograph of momma
Is what he swore kept him alive
A purple heart and an old guitar
Givin' by a dieing friend
Daddy promised him he'd play it
If he made it to the end
My father bought that mandolin
From a neighbor up the road
Who headed home to Oklahoma
He'd blown in with that dust bowl
Daddy kept both instruments
In the corner by his bed
Orville Gibson, C.F. Martin
And the music in his head
chorus
Daddy moaned Hank Williams, to a Dixie melody
Little Jimmy Dickens, would take a waltz to Tennessee
Then he'd sing Amazing grace, wash away my sin
On a flat top Martin and that old Gibson mandolin
A battered Martin D18
Mahogany and spruce
It was a wooden work of art
From 42
A sunburst Gibson mandolin
It was a classic Model A
Two voices straight from heaven
When my dad would sit and play
chorus
Daddy moaned Hank Williams...
I go to see my father now
His memory almost gone
His mind is tired
But his body carries on
I sit and strum my guitar
And he holds that mandolin
And sometimes, for a few songs
My dad comes back again
chorus and end
Gary's dad left quite a legacy. A doctor, a nurse and a chemist among them.
I am honored to call them friends.
Posted by: teej says go K-State at December 26, 2014 08:21 AM (jGqoT)
Posted by: Golfman in NC at December 26, 2014 08:21 AM (8ufJT)
Posted by: Dollar Store Sock at December 26, 2014 08:22 AM (c+gwp)
Posted by: --- at December 26, 2014 08:25 AM (MMC8r)
No hookers at 1AM? that's gonna put a dent in my "hookers and blow" lifestyle.
Wut? the blow is for the hookers, they can consider it a tip.
Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie at December 26, 2014 09:47 AM (VvOZ5)
Yes, I said it. I hate the "holiday" and I am not very impressed with those so ethnocentric that they would celebrate something so race-based and so obviously intended to distract from Christmas.
Posted by: WannabeAnglican at December 26, 2014 08:10 PM (CW6pW)
Posted by: Tina at December 28, 2014 03:46 AM (WprBO)
Posted by: Fr. John Whiteford at December 28, 2014 06:50 AM (z95BI)
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Real Clear Politics
Gallup
Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement
Integrity SAT's: Entrance Exam for Paul Anka's Band
AllahPundit's Paul Anka 45's Collection
AnkaPundit: Paul Anka Takes Over the Site for a Weekend (Continues through to Monday's postings)
George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an F*ckin' Hammer
Democratic Forays into Erotica
New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network
Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really Hate Potatoes
Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse
Signs You're at an Iraqi "Wedding Party"
Signs Your Clown Has Gone Bad
Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up
Signs of Hip-Hop Influence on John Kerry
NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom
Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?"
Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind
All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd
Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran
Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore
Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery
Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile
Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance
Collective Names for Groups of People
John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets
Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle
Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy
Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive"
Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments
John Edwards Campaign Excuses
John Kerry Pick-Up Lines
Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney
Torments in Dog-Hell
The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)