April 22, 2008
Going Green
I just thought that our lloyal llama readers would like to know that, in honor of Earth Day, so far today I have a) not cut down the mightiest tree in the forest (with or without a herring); b) kept my slaughter of whales to an even dozen instead of my more usual baker's dozen; and c) refrained from jetting all over the world to scold people about jetting all over the world. Also, despite massive opposition from the family, I insisted that we turn off all the taps and spigots at Orgle Manor, which we usually leave running in order to create a pleasant "waterfall effect" all around the house. It's tough, but hey - sometimes you just have to take one for your Mother.
Furthermore, I intend to stick with these limitations all day. I had thought of calling in this morning and saying that in order to reduce my carbon footprint, I wouldn't be coming to work. But I reckoned that the response would be that in order to save paper, I wouldn't be getting a paycheck. UPDATE: Uh, oh! It isn't going to matter anyway. An apparent glitch in the normal rate of sunspot activity is about to throw another spanner into Earth's climate workings. But Dee Cee isn't going to sink into the Chesapeake as a result. No sir, it's going to be buried under one hundred feet of ice! We're dooooomed!Posted by: Robert at 08:54 AM | Comments (31) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
April 21, 2008
Useful idiot watch . . .
brings you Jimmy Carter. Hamas offers a ten year truce if Israel withdraws to its 1967 borders but will never recognize the Jewish state. This is a non-starter if there ever was one but watch for the fools who will call on Israel to respond with some concession or another to show "good faith."
Posted by: LMC at 01:21 PM | Comments (28) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Gratuitous Domestic Posting (TM) - "Homer Sighs" Division
Muse, speak to me now of that resourceful manNo, of course I'm no Odysseus. However, I am embarking on what might prove to be a very long and arduous journey, indeed. You see, the storm drainage ditch that runs along the road out in front of Orgle Manor is basically....non-existent. The result is that every time we have heavy rains (like we did yesterday and today), sheets of water and mud come down the driveway, overwhelming my field drain, ponding on the drive, sweeping through my front garden, flooding the garage and leaking into the basement. And the problem gets worse as time goes on. I had a landscaper out on Friday to discuss a different matter. While he was there, I asked if he could do anything about the ditch. He refused point-blank because it is county property and he's been burned before for undertaking such projects without proper clearance. Preliminary investigation indicates that I am probably going to spend a lot of time sailing between the Scylla of Fairfax County and the Charybdis of the Virginia Dept. of Transportation. I figure that even if I can finally track down somebody and get them to do something, I'm going to feel pretty much like history's most famous shifty Ithican before I'm done.
who wandered far and wide after ravaging
the sacred citadel of Troy. He came to see
many people's cities, where he learned their customs,
while on the sea his spirit suffered many torments,
as he fought to save his life and lead his comrades home.
But though he wanted to, he could not rescue them—
they all died from their own stupidity, the fools.
They feasted on the cattle of Hyperion,
god of the sun—that's why he snatched away their chance
of getting home someday. So now, daughter of Zeus,
tell us his story, starting anywhere you wish.
Posted by: Robert at 11:25 AM | Comments (27) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Random Culinary Observation
At a party last evening, in the spirit of broad-mindedness I tried some raspberry flavored salsa.
I'm sorry, but some things just ain't right.Posted by: Robert at 10:21 AM | Comments (28) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Ye Doom Is Ycomme True***
This morning:
"Dad? Can I go bungee-jumping?" Um, no. "Well, can I just tie a rope around my leg and pretend to bungee-jump?" Ah, no. "Well, can I climb on the roof and just jump off without a rope?" Good Lord, no! And no, LMC, it was not the six year old swashbuckler who asked, but the eight year old, the one who is all sweetness and light and collects stuffed animals. I suppose I ought to be grateful that she actually asked before proceeding to try and break her neck.*** Spot the quote. UPDATE: Seeing as nobody has tried to nail the quote yet, I'll give you a hint: The rest of the line reads "Oh, go tell the Lacedaemonians to damn the torpedoes!"
Posted by: Robert at 09:59 AM | Comments (25) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Happy Birthday, Your Majesty!
Posted by: Robert at 09:45 AM | Comments (30) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
April 20, 2008
Editorial Note on "Premature Detonation"
Faithful readers, I took down the "Premature detonation" clip after reading the comments and watching the tape again, especially the last few lines of audio. Babs, it was not Coalition soldiers who got zapped. Sous, it is confusing, but it looks more like the casualties were more likely Iraqi volunteers who have come out of the woodwork in recent months to help the ISF and Coalition forces hunt the bad guys. If I am correct, the clip better illustrates what not to do when dealing with unexploded ordinance than anything else. It is bad enough when the bad guys take the good guys out, it is worse when the good guys inadvertently take themselves off the board. Thanks for asking the questions--they help keep this blog one of the best out there.
Posted by: LMC at 07:43 PM | Comments (28) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Surf over to the Cake-eater Pad
and offer a few words of encouragement. Kathy is feeling a little under the weather.
Posted by: LMC at 01:37 PM | Comments (25) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Hysteria on Al-Sadr
There has been a lot of blather in the MSM about Al-Sadr's latest threat to declare "open war" on Coalition forces and end for good the truce declared last August. At the risk of pointing out the obvious, here are two observations: (1) The "truce" was unilateral and we never agreed to stop operations against anyone with hostile intent against us, including the criminal elements of Jaish Al Mahdi and JAM Special Groups. (2) Al-Sadr went on the defensive last summer for the usual reasons: to consolidate and reorganize, and, if necessary, set the conditions for future offensive operations. The Sadrist movement fractured into several competing elements which are fighting each other as much as rival Shia militias, Coalition forces, and the Sunnis.
Posted by: LMC at 01:32 PM | Comments (29) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
For all the Ashley Judd fans,
all the pics you can handle in honor of her 40th birthday which was yesterday.
Posted by: LMC at 01:14 PM | Comments (27) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
I bet she gets lots of dates . . .
you figure out why. Via Special Agent Bedhead.
Posted by: LMC at 01:11 PM | Comments (24) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
April 18, 2008
A Dime's Worth Of Difference?
There are a lot of registered Republicans who didn't vote for John McCain as their nominee. Of course, a majority of them did. And McCain is the Republican nominee for President. It's no longer a matter of preference. It's a done deal.
And some of those who profess angst about his nomination like to say that there's little difference between the AZ Senator and the two Democrats beating each other to a pulp to win their party's nomination. I say it's time to put aside personal grudges and consider the following. This passage is from pages 254-255 of John McCain's "Faith of my Fathers". As part of his account of his time as a prisoner of war at the Hanoi Hilton, McCain describes the process of truly understanding the lessons of his father and grandfather about service to country.During the long pause between bombing campaigns in the North, while the months and years dragged on, it was hard to take our interrogators’ ridicule of our conviction that our loyalty to America was returned, measure for measure, by our distant compatriots. But we clung to our belief, each one encouraging the other, not with overexuberant hopes that our day of liberation was close at hand, but with a steady resolve that our honor was the extension of a great nation’s honor, and that both prisoner and country would do what honor asked of us. In prison, I fell in love with my country. I had loved her before then, but like most young people, my affection was little more than a simple appreciation for the comforts and privileges most Americans enjoyed and took for granted. It wasn’t until I had lost America for a time that I realized how much I loved her. I loved what I missed most from my life at home: my family and friends; the sights and sounds of my country; the hustle and purposefulness of Americans; their fervid independence; sports; music; information – all the attractive qualities of American life. But though I longed for the things at home I cherished the most, I still shared the ideals of America. And since those ideals were all that I possessed of my country, they became all the more important to me. It was what freedom conferred on America that I loved the most – the distinction of being the last, best hope of humanity; the advocate for all who believed in the Rights of Man. Freedom is America’s honor, and all honor comes with obligations. We have the obligation to use our freedom wisely, to select well from all the choices freedom offers. We can accept or reject the obligation, but if we are to preserve our freedom, our honor, we must choose well. I was no longer the boy to whom liberty meant simply that I could do as I pleased, and who, in my vanity, used my freedom to polish my image as an I-don’t-give-a-damn nonconformist. That’s not to say that I had shed myself entirely of that attribute. I had not, and have not yet. But I no longer located my self-respect in that distinction. In prison, where my cherished independence was mocked and assaulted, I found my self-respect in a shared fidelity to my country. All honor comes with obligations. I and the men with whom I served had accepted ours, and we were grateful for the privilege.Compare this to a candidate whose wife just recently became "proud" of her country or to a candidate whose candidacy is more about the acquisition of personal power than anything else (power so seducing that a simple concept like truth could never stand in the way of its pursuit). No difference? Perhaps Sen. McCain is more like a Democrat on some specific issues, but in the recognition of what this country represents and for a true understanding of why it is so great there is no contest.
Posted by: Gary at 03:36 PM | Comments (27) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Where's Robbo? Friday This N' That Edition
A much-needed day away from the office today. All the windows at Orgle Manor are wide open and I plan to spend the afternoon weedin' n' feedin' out in the shrubbery.
****Went off to the vet this morning to get the ol' Llama physical. I'm happy to say (touching wood) that I am an extremely boring patient. And I certainly hope to keep it that way. (I'm also happy to say that I never made a wiser decision than settling on a woman internist with thin fingers, if ya knowwhutImean and I think ya do.) ****Tomorrow morning we will be faced with the interesting logistical problems of three soccer games at exactly the same time. Fortunately, two of them are in the same general complex, but I am still either going to have to choose one game to watch or else spend most of my time hoofing back and forth between fields a couple hundred yards apart. ****While it's wonderful to see my beloved Washington Nationals involved in so many sweeps, it's a real pity that they always seem to be at the wrong end of the broomstick. Last night's third straight loss to the Mets was particularly vexacious, given that the two Mets mostly responsible for the win - Brian Schneider and Ryan Church - played for the Nats last year. Gary must be grinning ear to ear. ****After having tried unsuccessfully several times over the past ten years, I have finally gotten well in to Gibbon's Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire. I used to get bogged down in the first book, but this time I've gotten on past the Battle of Hadrionople and the death of the Western Emperor Gratian already and am confident that I can finally make it all the way through the entire work. ****Many people have asked how the post-Tiber crossing' ecumenical thing is working out in the Llama Household. Well, so far, so good. Indeed, because the Missus has to go out of town Sunday night, I will be taking the Llama-ettes off to a pot-luck supper for my old Palie church alone. And as I was telling Father M the other night, I still enjoy going to services with the family since it allows me to sing the hymns full-bore without feeling like a moron. Funnily enough, my activity in this area has persuaded my R.C. sponsor, whose own wife also attends my old church, to become more active himself, with the result that he is going to come out with his family to the Diocesan retreat at Shrine Mont this year. I told him we can stand around on the porch together Friday night complaining about the absence of fish from the menu. ****The eldest Llama-ette told me this morning that her musick teacher at St. Marie of the Blessed Educational Method had told the class that she was going to teach them a rap song, upon which the gel reportedly replied, "I'm sorry, but my Dad won't allow me to learn rap." That's me gel! ****And yes, I chose the word "shrubbery" deliberately just to set up the closer. Here ya go:Posted by: Robert at 11:37 AM | Comments (29) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
April 17, 2008
Fun with Pshop
Johnny Virgil at 15 Minute Lunch gets a lot of humor mileage out of his sp*m folder using Pshop.
Enjoy!Posted by: Chai-Rista at 04:03 PM | Comments (30) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
A Cuppa-Cuppa-Cuppa-Cuppa-Cup
Created by OnePlusYou
Posted by: Robert at 08:31 AM | Comments (32) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
April 16, 2008
Leave Barry Obama Alone!
OK, this is pretty good (as far as parody goes):
Posted by: Gary at 09:51 PM | Comments (27) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Guess what?
According to the The Journal of Neuroscience, injecting neurotoxins into your face = bad idea!
Posted by: Chai-Rista at 04:01 PM | Comments (31) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Jump!
The Missus is after me again about buying a trampoline for the Llama-ettes. I had thought that I had successfully quashed this idea last fall, but it appears to have, ah, bounced back.
The horrible thing? I can feel myself weakening this time around. (I only admit that because the Missus swears she never reads the blog anymore.) And it doesn't have anything to do with the merits of the case. No, instead it's because the she's using her wiles on me instead of hectoring me. (I hate it when they do that!) So, please: Write in again about all the terrible things associated with trampolines! Be scary! Be gloomy! Send anecdotes about how some kid's teeth all got knocked out or the neighbors sued or the grass all died or a burglar used the thing to launch himself to an unlocked second-story window! Help me, Obi-wan Kenobi! You're my only hope!Posted by: Robert at 10:53 AM | Comments (34) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
I'm Robbo the Llama And I May Be Going To Hell
The WaPo Blog had a brief article yesterday on how Dee Cee's Nationals Park is being readied for Benedict's celebration of Mass there tomorrow:
As explained by Archbishop of Washington Donald W. Wuerl yesterday afternoon, the pontiff will enter the park via right field, and, at 9:30 a.m., do a lap of the field in the popemobile. Then he'll exit, change into vestments for the Mass and re-emerge. This afternoon, workers were covering the field and starting to erect the stage, which is in the centerfield area. (In other words, if you ended up with tickets behind home plate, you're kind of far away from the action, unlike a Nats' game.) Wuerl vows that everything will be ready. Advertising (even the big stuff flanking the jumbotron) will be covered up and, no, of course they won't be selling beer on Thursday. Those with the closest seats are the two sections flanking the stage. Stage right will be the choirs and stage left will be high school and college students. There are also about 5,000 seats on the field. (Warning: if you know you have a seat on the field, eat a huge breakfast. You won't have access to the snack bars and the little snack they're going to give you when you arrive won't go very far). "When the Mass starts, I think we're going to recognize that we have been successful at taking this venue and making it a holy space--a sacred space," said a beaming Wuerl. He spent yesterday afternoon touring the site. "I think you are going to see that Nationals Park became a church--if only for one day." But before that are lots of logistics. Wuerl pledges that they can get 46,000 people through Communion in less than 20 minutes. Three-hundred deacons will be stationed around the park, so Catholics won't have to leave their section to receive the body and blood of Christ.Emphasis added. In fact, I've been idly wondering over the past few days just how the heck the Host could be distributed to 46,000 people, especially people stacked up in stadium seating, in anything under about five hours. And for some reason, I keep having visions of squads of deacons armed with those tee-shirt cannons they use during games:
"Cardinal Smithers! Some more shots down the left field line!" I kid. I KID! St. Vitus, ora pro nobis! No, btw, I won't be going. However, I know some people who are, and whom I am sure will tell you all about it.
Posted by: Robert at 10:26 AM | Comments (36) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
Cast Away
This afternoon the eight year old gets the cast removed from her (now presumably healed) wrist fracture.
The last couple weeks she's been playing soccer with her cast wrapped up in bubble-wrap. This, I am told, is mandated by law here in the Commonwealth of Ol' Virginny. At first I assumed that this requirement had to do with protecting the injury of the cast-bound player, but having been on the receiving end of the thing a couple times myself, I suddenly realized that it was, in fact, for the benefit of the others on the field. (Ouch!) So while I naturally recoil at the officious busy-bodiness of Richmond in making such a measure a legal requirement, I also see the underlying good sense in taking such a precaution. After last Saturday's game, the gel ripped the bubble-wrap off and invited her team-mates to help her pop it all. It was the best example of team work I saw all day.Posted by: Robert at 08:40 AM | Comments (25) | Add Comment | Trackbacks (Suck)
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