Food Thread: Smoke 'Em If You've Got 'Em!

Long-time commenter and long-distance shooter "Blake" sent this along, and I must admit, I feel a bit guilty not having smoked the Mac&Cheese I served yesterday. That looks delicious! It is also another data point in my life-long study confirming my theory that everything is better in a smoker. Or at least as good!

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There is a difference between the faintly disgusting unripe tomatoes that Big Supermarket tries to pawn off on us, and the late summer green tomatoes that are used in the South to make Fried Green Tomatoes. Sadly, the tomatoes around here are uniformly awful, so I can't even wing it. But damn, a well executed fried tomato is delicious, and it is just my luck that I happened across this recipe when it is at least a month before anything palatable is available!

You Southerners are lucky!

Southern Fried Green Tomatoes Recipe

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Yup, that looks faintly disgusting, mostly because I am not an accomplished food photographer and it was impromptu anyway!

So what is it? a delicious cheeseburger (American Cheese Food Product, and a plain-Jane bun), with some avocado and...drum roll...a Poblano and Serrano chile hot sauce that a friend sent me. One might assume that it was going to be on the hot side, but it was perfectly balanced, with the sweetness of the Poblanos balancing the sometimes considerable heat of the Serranos. It was simply spicy, with all of the interesting flavors of the chiles on full display.

Great stuff! Poblano & Serrano Hot Sauce

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Plain old American Baked Beans! A bit too sweet for my taste, but I make them at home and can control the amount of sugar. So that pot turned out very, very well! The onions and green peppers that I was browning in the bacon fat took forever, I think because of the amount of liquid they sweated out. Obviously there is variation in each onion or pepper or whatever, and I think I simply got unlucky. But they eventually gave up enough water to brown a bit, and all was right and true and simple in DildoWorld.

They went well with grilled chicken, baby-back ribs, some great Mac&Cheese, a weird but good pasta salad, and some green stuff.

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Yup...that is a nice big octopus tentacle in a bun! Looks great, and I'll bet it tastes great!

Grilled octopus is wonderful, and when I see it on a menu I usually order it...like a few days ago in an Italian restaurant in Philadelphia! They served it on a ceci bean mash, and it worked well. But a large tentacle in a hot dog bun is minimalist and elegant. That might be the way to go!

[Hat Tip: naturalfake]

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I apologize in advance for how f*cking awful the writing is in this article, but the topic is interesting, so try to suffer through it! Young writers need to put down their phones and pick up a few well-written books!

Anyway, I was exposed to NC barbecue courtesy of my father, who would occasionally lecture in that state, and would bring back their various types of barbecue as often as possible. The one I remember best is the simplest...vinegar and red pepper flakes. Who knew something so simple could be so delicious.

Mapping a Barbecue Sauce Trail Through the Carolinas

Of course this brings up the existential question: ~~Ginger or MaryAnne~~ should barbecue be sauced to begin with?

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The garlic is harvested! And it looks...well...sigh. Send all of your excellent home-grown garlic to: cbd dot aoshq at gmail dot com.

Rumor has it that the Bourbon Bubble is bursting. I have seen no evidence of decreasing prices, but maybe the bursting started somewhere else! I think the sweet spot is $40-$60 for excellent and interesting bottles, and bumping that to $100 gets you an incremental improvement in quality, but nothing mind-blowing. More than that and I think you are paying for hype and rarity, which may look good in your liquor cabinet, but doesn't translate to more quality in the bottle.

The problem...or the solution...is to buy lots of bourbon, take tasting notes, and eventually arrive at your favorites! It should take forty or fifty years, but it is worth it!

Posted by: CBD at 04:00 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Food fight

Posted by: Skip at July 12, 2026 04:00 PM (Ia/+0)

2 ZOW!!!

Posted by: MAxIE at July 12, 2026 04:01 PM (9DOTQ)

3 Fact:
Beans should not run on a plate.
That is all

Posted by: MkY at July 12, 2026 04:03 PM (q6tQZ)

4 Read this week East Anglia in England has banned the use of hose pipe,

Posted by: Skip at July 12, 2026 04:05 PM (Ia/+0)

5 What is with Gen Xers acting like they were all free range feral children?

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at July 12, 2026 04:05 PM (kpS4V)

6 Cheesesteak soon, bogo on shaved steak will do that

Posted by: Skip at July 12, 2026 04:06 PM (Ia/+0)

7 Here is an extremely easy way to make a frozen daiquiri. It involves no blenders or other equipment, and I can attest that the unusual texture is wonderful. I may have linked this before, IDK.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=86hMKSwiWoI

Posted by: Archimedes at July 12, 2026 04:06 PM (Riz8t)

8 Oh, I forgot about North Carolina BBQ, and since I'll be there Thursday evening, that can be dinner option for Little and me..

Posted by: Joe Kidd at July 12, 2026 04:06 PM (nbLIj)

9 So diabetic allergy-safe (except for wheat) 2 ingredient cake was a huge win. Everyone loved it. 12 oz Pepsi Cola Zero Cherry into a Duncan Hines Devils Food Cake. Bake til done per package directions.

Now, I admit the topping was the wow. But that was just 2lbs of fresh cherries cooked down with one Aldi's cherry pie filling, 1 TB vanilla, and 1 tsp raw sugar. (Diabetic did not have this b/c cherries are just bad for diabetics). Cooled and used for topping.

To serve, each slice topped with the cherries and either Aldi's Whipped Cream or Coconut Cream.

Home run for cost, ease, and popularity.

1st cake I've made with diet soda. Probably not the last if he visits again (b/c no egg, no soy, no nuts, and no dairy (for me) and low sugar is rough to put a dessert together with)...

Posted by: Nova Local at July 12, 2026 04:07 PM (tOcjL)

10 The only octopus I have ever had was in a cold salad, a large rubber band would be an appropriate substitute.
Not a fan.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at July 12, 2026 04:07 PM (NnhvP)

11 Read this week East Anglia in England has banned the use of hose pipe,
Posted by: Skip at July 12, 2026 04:05 PM (Ia/+0)
----------
That will limit what you can do with a drunken sailor.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea at July 12, 2026 04:07 PM (amcLV)

12 Can't abide NC BBQ sauce with vinegar.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at July 12, 2026 04:07 PM (jehhT)

13 I am a connoisseur of hose water. The coppery tang is required. The healthy pvc nose is just divine.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at July 12, 2026 04:08 PM (diia5)

14 The only octopus I have ever had was in a cold salad, a large rubber band would be an appropriate substitute.
Not a fan.

I concur with the sentiment, but don't imagine for a second that it will save you when the octopi rise up in revolt.

Posted by: Archimedes at July 12, 2026 04:08 PM (Riz8t)

15 Octopodes.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea at July 12, 2026 04:09 PM (amcLV)

16 Saw this on YT:

Pasta alla Zozzona: Rome’s Secret Pasta That Combines All 4 Roman Pastas:

https://tinyurl.com/37evskkk

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at July 12, 2026 04:09 PM (kpS4V)

17 Octopodes.
Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea

You are obviously not allowed to audition for movies, now.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at July 12, 2026 04:09 PM (diia5)

18 The guy who tells us not to put syrup on french toast puts avocado on a cheeseburger?

Posted by: mikeski at July 12, 2026 04:09 PM (VHUov)

19 Hose water goes well with paint chips!

Posted by: Pawl! at July 12, 2026 04:10 PM (gKWVE)

20 Some of the best baked beans ever came from a restaurant in Boston called Durgin Park. The restaurant was originally founded in the 1800s and finally closed a few years ago and their baked bean recipe was offered pretty much the entire time.

Place became very touristy because the food was really good but their baked beans were awesome.

And yes, you should always make smoked mac and cheese. Because smoked mac and cheese.

Posted by: JackStraw at July 12, 2026 04:10 PM (viF8m)

21 Good afternoon, horde!

CBD, I have never tried making baked beans from scratch. Those look really good. Do you have a recipe you recommend?

Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at July 12, 2026 04:10 PM (h7ZuX)

22 What is with Gen Xers acting like they were all free range feral children?
Posted by: All Hail Eris

Enough of us were, and the rest just want to claim they were in the cool kids' club?

Posted by: mikeski at July 12, 2026 04:10 PM (VHUov)

23 Plural of Octopus

While "octopi" is commonly used, it is technically a grammatically flawed formation. Because "octopus" is Greek in origin rather than Latin, adding an "-i" isn't the correct pluralization.

Octopuses: The most common and widely accepted standard English plural.

Octopodes: The traditional Greek plural, which is accurate but rarely used in modern speech.

Octopi: Formed by mistakenly applying Latin rules to a Greek word, but frequently accepted in casual use.

Posted by: Archimedes at July 12, 2026 04:10 PM (Riz8t)

24 Hello foodies,

Here in Northern Wyoming the local octopus is a rare treat.

Posted by: Pete Bogs Agentic alter ego at July 12, 2026 04:11 PM (bXtdx)

25 Pulpo forever!

Posted by: Hokey Pokey at July 12, 2026 04:11 PM (YlWIZ)

26 You are obviously not allowed to audition for movies, now.
Posted by: weft cut-loop at July 12, 2026 04:09 PM (diia5)
----------
My agent was crap, anyway.

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea at July 12, 2026 04:11 PM (amcLV)

27 Octopus are friends not food.

Posted by: JackStraw at July 12, 2026 04:12 PM (viF8m)

28
NC bbq with the vinegar sauce is my favorite.

Husband grew up in SC where mustard based BBQ was the thing.

I think the mustard based BBQ masks the true flavor of the smoked meat.

Anyway it has been an ongoing "discussion" over many years, lol.

People like what they ate where they grew up.

Posted by: four seasons at July 12, 2026 04:12 PM (/QHx4)

29 Hosting another male guest tonight, but he only needs to avoid pork and shellfish (loose on all other restrictions, but since I don't do dairy anyway, well, it works)...so much more flexible dinner...but still component like Friday, since he wasn't forthcoming on likes/dislikes (doesn't want to be a pest, I think - daughter's friend)...

Doing Chicken Caesar Wraps (Honey Mustard for me) with Chicken Thigh, Parmesan Shreds, Bottled Caesar, Romaine, Green Leaf, and Spinach, Chopped Tomatoes, and Pickled Onions. With roasted garlic cauliflower and strawberries and blueberries.

Made double blueberry muffins and my allergy safe rice treats (that I'm sending to youth group anyway, so 2 birds, 1 stone) for dessert.

Then no more guests for a little while...I hope.

Posted by: Nova Local at July 12, 2026 04:12 PM (tOcjL)

30 It is also another data point in my life-long study confirming my theory that everything is better in a smoker.

******

You Southerners are lucky!

On Earth as it is in Texas.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at July 12, 2026 04:12 PM (0sNs1)

31 27 Octopus are friends not food.

That's just what they want you to think.

Posted by: Archimedes at July 12, 2026 04:12 PM (Riz8t)

32 That's just what they want you to think.
Posted by: Archimedes at July 12, 2026 04:12 PM (Riz8t)
----------
What, are they in league with the penguins?

Posted by: Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea at July 12, 2026 04:14 PM (amcLV)

33 Beans should not run on a plate.

Posted by: MkY at July 12, 2026 04:03 PM (q6tQZ)

That was before 3+ hours in the oven!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at July 12, 2026 04:14 PM (l4RKn)

34 Boomers loved hose water too!

Posted by: Tuna at July 12, 2026 04:14 PM (lJ0H4)

35 Putting avocado on hamburgers kind of weakens your food cred

Posted by: Skip at July 12, 2026 04:14 PM (Ia/+0)

36 6 Cheesesteak soon, bogo on shaved steak will do that
Posted by: Skip at July 12, 2026 04:06 PM (Ia/+0)

LOVE BOGOs, especially on shaved steak! I got BOGOs on chicken thighs for tonight - it helped decide what type of chicken I was cutting up into tender size and air frying...

Posted by: Nova Local at July 12, 2026 04:14 PM (tOcjL)

37 Cesarina in San Diego makes a good polpo croccante. It’s certainly not my first choice from the menu when I go there, however. That would be their black truffle gnocchi.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at July 12, 2026 04:15 PM (kYmoU)

38 Hose water with a cut grass twist.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at July 12, 2026 04:16 PM (jehhT)

39 18 The guy who tells us not to put syrup on french toast puts avocado on a cheeseburger?
Posted by: mikeski at July 12, 2026 04:09 PM (VHUov)

Shouldn't have cheese - avocado serves that function...should have bacon on that burger, too, though...

Posted by: Nova Local at July 12, 2026 04:16 PM (tOcjL)

40 The guy who tells us not to put syrup on french toast Posted by: mikeski at July 12, 2026 04:09 PM

Those are not CBD's only peccadillos. He also shoots 9mm, maintains an opinion that there is good BBQ outside of the South (and especially Texas), and there are rumors that he's a Gingerite.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at July 12, 2026 04:17 PM (0sNs1)

41 I'm not cooking or prepping anything else today; I'm in kitchen time-out because I darn near cut off a fingertip while slicing and dicing chicken for the dog food.

Mr. Dmlw! asked if I needed to go the urgent care. I showed him a pint jar, and told him if I lose that much blood, he could take me.

AZ deplorable moron, I can't say enough about those blood clotting bandaids you introduced me to at a MoMe.

Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at July 12, 2026 04:17 PM (h7ZuX)

42 Some of the best baked beans ever came from a restaurant in Boston called Durgin Park. The restaurant was originally founded in the 1800s and finally closed a few years ago and their baked bean recipe was offered pretty much the entire time.

Place became very touristy because the food was really good but their baked beans were awesome.

And yes, you should always make smoked mac and cheese. Because smoked mac and cheese.
Posted by: JackStraw at July 12, 2026 04:10 PM (viF8m)

Their Indian pudding with a dollop of vanilla ice cream paired very well with their Durgin Dark ale...

Posted by: Joe Kidd at July 12, 2026 04:17 PM (nbLIj)

43 I much prefer chicken thighs than legs, and H8 winds as there is nothing to them

Posted by: Skip at July 12, 2026 04:18 PM (Ia/+0)

44 Do you have a recipe you recommend?

Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at July 12, 2026 04:10 PM (h7ZuX)

There are a bunch of great recipes around. I would start with Alton Brown's recipe, although I think his is too sweet.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at July 12, 2026 04:18 PM (l4RKn)

45 That's just what they want you to think.
Posted by: Archimedes at July 12, 2026 04:12 PM (Riz8t)
----------
What, are they in league with the penguins?

Yes, but Big Panda is the eminence grise.

Posted by: Archimedes at July 12, 2026 04:18 PM (Riz8t)

46 Night diving in Puget Sound shortly after certification we came across a big Pacific Octopus making his evening rounds. We regarded each other intently for a few moments before it changed color and disappeared into the shadows. Very cool. He was probably calculating how we would taste rather than considering the alternative.

Posted by: Pete Bogs Agentic alter ego at July 12, 2026 04:18 PM (bXtdx)

47 and H8 winds as there is nothing to them
Posted by: Skip at July 12, 2026 04:18 PM

Call me; I can help.

Posted by: Gerrold Nadler (D-NY) at July 12, 2026 04:19 PM (0sNs1)

48 That octopus tentacle in a bun....

I'll be in my bunk.

Posted by: Kurt Eichenwald at July 12, 2026 04:19 PM (brIJB)

49 The guy who tells us not to put syrup on french toast puts avocado on a cheeseburger?

Posted by: mikeski at July 12, 2026 04:09 PM (VHUov)

Nice and fatty, great creaminess, takes salt very well.

What's not to like?

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at July 12, 2026 04:21 PM (l4RKn)

50 40 The guy who tells us not to put syrup on french toast Posted by: mikeski at July 12, 2026 04:09 PM

Those are not CBD's only peccadillos. He also shoots 9mm, maintains an opinion that there is good BBQ outside of the South (and especially Texas), and there are rumors that he's a Gingerite.
Posted by: Duncanthrax at July 12, 2026 04:17 PM (0sNs1)

At least you didn't accuse him of consorting with mephitic flightless semi-acquatic sea birds...

Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, the Housekeeper at July 12, 2026 04:22 PM (brIJB)

51 >>Their Indian pudding with a dollop of vanilla ice cream paired very well with their Durgin Dark ale..

It was a great old place. Their roast beef was almost comically Flintstone's size huge.

Posted by: JackStraw at July 12, 2026 04:22 PM (viF8m)

52 blood clotting bandaids you introduced me to at a MoMe.
Posted by: Dash my lace wigs!

Glad to have been of service!

In my defense I found them because someone who also lives in this house gets attacked by splinters and thorns, often.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at July 12, 2026 04:22 PM (NnhvP)

53 I must say my wife smokes, and, well it is better.

Posted by: epador at July 12, 2026 04:22 PM (Owryw)

54 I can't say enough about those blood clotting bandaids you introduced me to at a MoMe.

Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at July 12, 2026 04:17 PM (h7ZuX)

Hah!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at July 12, 2026 04:22 PM (l4RKn)

55 Michigan Smoky Beans

1 lb dry Navy beans; 1 clove garlic; 1 onion stuck with two cloves; 1 bay leaf; pinch of thyme; 1 small onion, chopped; 1 red bell pepper, chopped; ¼ cup butter; 2 cups tomato puree; ¼ cup minced parsley; 2 tsp salt; ½ tsp liquid smoke.

Boil beans, garlic, onion stuck with cloves, bay leaf and thyme in water to cover till beans are tender. Drain and reserve liquid. Sauté the chopped onion and pepper in butter till onion is lightly colored. Add tomato purée, parsley, salt and liquid smoke. Then add 1 cup of the reserved bean liquor and simmer 5 minutes. Pour mixture over beans, adding bean liquor, if necessary, barely to cover. Bake at 350° 30 minutes. Excellent made a day or two ahead to let the savory flavors blend.

That’s from a Michigan Bean Industry cookbook, and it is quite good. (Back when Michigan had industries, and industries published promotional cookbooks.)

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at July 12, 2026 04:24 PM (kYmoU)

56 34 Boomers loved hose water too!
Posted by: Tuna
----

That's what I'm sayin'.

Best shared with dog and cat.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at July 12, 2026 04:24 PM (kpS4V)

57 Remember the taste and feel of the metal hose fitting? That added a certain complexity to the gustatory experience.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at July 12, 2026 04:26 PM (l4RKn)

58 Hose water should always be almost hot at first and cool to tepid at best.

Posted by: nurse ratched. at July 12, 2026 04:26 PM (5MU6/)

59 Putting avocado on a hamburger kind of weakens your food cred

I don’t believe they have to confiscate a ManCard for that, tho I think they probably have to bend a corner

Posted by: Common Tater at July 12, 2026 04:26 PM (IhfQt)

60 At least you didn't accuse him of consorting with mephitic flightless semi-acquatic sea birds...
Posted by: I am the Shadout Mapes, the Housekeeper at July 12, 2026 04:22 PM

There's never been a whiff of that, thank goodness.

Nor, AFAIK, has anyone ever seen him slip carrots into chili.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at July 12, 2026 04:27 PM (0sNs1)

61 Simple dinner that I made earlier this week: 2lb bag of frozen pork gyoza and a 1lb bag of kimchi gyoza. Dipping sauce was a blend of soy and tonkatsu sauces, with a couple shakes of El Yucateco chipotle sauce. Steamed rice on the side. Maybe 30 minutes of prep, including cooking the rice...

Posted by: Joe Kidd at July 12, 2026 04:28 PM (nbLIj)

62 Hose water should always be almost hot at first and cool to tepid at best.
Posted by: nurse ratched

Hose water in AZ is always boiled, and served hot.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at July 12, 2026 04:29 PM (NnhvP)

63 Boomers loved hose water too!
Posted by: Tuna
----

That's what I'm sayin'.

Best shared with dog and cat.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes

As a matter of fact our hose water probably tasted better because hoses were more primitive back in the 50's. A nice rubbery flavor which can't be duplicated these days with the new fangled metal hoses.

Posted by: Tuna at July 12, 2026 04:30 PM (lJ0H4)

64 Gyoza is fantastic in soups in the winter.

Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at July 12, 2026 04:32 PM (vnlVL)

65 61 Simple dinner that I made earlier this week: 2lb bag of frozen pork gyoza and a 1lb bag of kimchi gyoza. Dipping sauce was a blend of soy and tonkatsu sauces, with a couple shakes of El Yucateco chipotle sauce. Steamed rice on the side. Maybe 30 minutes of prep, including cooking the rice...
Posted by: Joe Kidd at July 12, 2026 04:28 PM (nbLIj)

I've been making a deconstructed, then reconstructed, dumpling casserole with a bag of HMart dumplings air fried while ground chicken or pork with garlic and ginger and tons of veg (usually a cabbage or kale, onions, peppers, mushrooms, carrots, etc) is sauteed, drained of liquid, and then seasoned with soy, hoisin, and oyster sauce (and something spicy - sometimes chili crisp, sometimes just black pepper). When that's finished, i dump it over the dumplings, thereby upping the meat amount and getting the kids to eat a few less dumplings (b/c they'd bankrupt me otherwise). Everyone loves it.

Posted by: Nova Local at July 12, 2026 04:32 PM (tOcjL)

66 That recipe looks good, Stephen Price Blair. Think I'll try that one.

Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at July 12, 2026 04:33 PM (h7ZuX)

67 A little tip I learned from Chef Andrew Gruel I tried last night. He recommends freezing hamburger patties before putting them on the grill. This allows the outside of the burger to get a good char while the inside stays juicy and cooks slowly thanks to the frozen meet and doesn't get overcooked and dry.

Tried it last night and it worked great. Just don't make your burgers too thin.

Posted by: JackStraw at July 12, 2026 04:34 PM (viF8m)

68 How's this for a Gen X story. My friends and I lived in a small town, and one of our neighbors passed away years prior, and no one took care of the property. On that property was a barn, which was ripe for exploring between daily baseball games. Turns out the guy was a mortician, and inside that barn were about 7 or 8 high quality coffins. This promptly because a new interest, as in "iI dare you to get in that coffin. No one bulked, and of course the lid came down more than once.

It gets better. The guy, also, had goats, who no one fed after he died. We didn't know he had them or we would have taken care of them. But, back in the corner of this coffin storing barn were a few piles of bones. Think about it. Curious kids with an inborn death wish, off limits barn filled with empty coffins, and piles of bones laying around. Throw in the Gen X mentality, and it's better than Disneyland.

Posted by: Orson at July 12, 2026 04:34 PM (dIske)

69 That recipe looks good, Stephen Price Blair. Think I'll try that one.

Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at July 12, 2026 04:33 PM (h7ZuX)

Bacon...Bacon!...BACON!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at July 12, 2026 04:36 PM (l4RKn)

70 Tried it last night and it worked great. Just don't make your burgers too thin.

Posted by: JackStraw at July 12, 2026 04:34 PM (viF8m)

Interesting. I think I am going to try that. It makes sense.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at July 12, 2026 04:37 PM (l4RKn)

71 Well, yeah, bacon. Goes without saying.

I have never actually used liquid smoke. Bacon will usually do it. Or smoked paprika.

And for Mac and Ceese, or cheesy potatoes, Smokhouse cheddar. I don't have a smoker. One of these days I'll get one of those.

Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at July 12, 2026 04:39 PM (h7ZuX)

72 >>What is with Gen Xers acting like they were all free range feral children?

Because we've lived to see the dramatic shift the helicopter parenting, either while raising our kids (if we started late) or with grandchildren.

When I first had my son, I had a colleague whose kid was 2 yrs older, and she would read every Parent magazine horror story, watch every panicky news story and become certain that this would happen any minute ("Did you know they can drown in 1" of water?!" and "Did you know there's a website that shows you where convicted child predators live?!"). It was so sad!
I can tell you that 70's moms did not have this info pushed on them, and they did not waste time thinking we were in the brink of accidental death at all times. They were chill, 'rub some dirt in that' and 'get back on and try again.'

Posted by: Lizzy at July 12, 2026 04:44 PM (X8xt3)

73
I make a mac and cheese that has cream of whatever soup you want.

I use. cream of brocolli soup and the grandchildren love it.

Gets a bit of vegs in them.

Posted by: four seasons at July 12, 2026 04:45 PM (/QHx4)

74 Just made some chicken stock in the instapot and am roasting some mixed veggies in the oven. I’ll make some Jasmin rice with turmeric and thaw out some Costco rotisserie chicken for meals this week. I also have some corn tortillas and some various salsas on hand. Should Be enough variation. Oh. And I’ll take a couple pieces of fish out of the freeezer mid week.

It’s a challenge cooking for one and not wasting food.

Posted by: nurse ratched. at July 12, 2026 04:46 PM (yEz+x)

75 Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at July 12, 2026 04:32 PM (vnlVL)

Thanks for that suggestion. I keep instant ramen in the house because Little makes it for himself a few times a week. Gonna suggest he add a couple pork dumplings in there for a more substantial snack..

Posted by: Joe Kidd at July 12, 2026 04:47 PM (nbLIj)

76 Hamburger buns should not be raw; they should be toasted and buttered. Have you been hanging out with Chuckie Schumer?!

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at July 12, 2026 04:47 PM (R+iUD)

77 Mom used to make an oven baked Mac & Cheese with “Polish” sausages. Not authentic to any particular cuisine, (American trailer-trash?) but it sure tasted good when a little kid. I made it a couple times years later and it brought me right back.

Liquid Smoke (Hickory) is useful stuff to keep on hand actually, although I almost never remember to buy it. Once every decade or two

Posted by: Common Tater at July 12, 2026 04:47 PM (IhfQt)

78 Palisades peaches started arriving in Colorado stores and farmers markets a few weeks ago (earlier than usual) and they are the best! Chopped w/a little vanilla ice cream is sublime.

Posted by: Lizzy at July 12, 2026 04:48 PM (X8xt3)

79 Lizzy,
Try throwing peach halves on the grill!

Posted by: nurse ratched. at July 12, 2026 04:49 PM (yEz+x)

80 It’s a challenge cooking for one and not wasting food.
Posted by: nurse ratched. at July 12, 2026 04:46 PM (yEz+x)

I remember when we were 2 early in marriage - it was when more expensive things and cuts got bought b/c they were the right size.

Like we always had raspberries every week, b/c one pack was one meal. Same for fresh salmon and nice steak - it's sold at the perfect size for 2.

I never did whole proteins (like a whole bird or roast). Or whole melons (which now can be killed in my house in one day when I have the crew of 7, even without more guests)...

Posted by: Nova Local at July 12, 2026 04:49 PM (tOcjL)

81 “Of course this brings up the existential question: Ginger or MaryAnne should barbecue be sauced to begin with?”

Not if you have the right rub recipe.

I’m doing some beef short ribs now. Put them on at 4 yesterday afternoon. Still not done. In fairness, it’s a serious Fred Flintstone sized rack. Waiting for 205* internal temp. 195* now. Soon…
And no barbecue sauce while they are cooking. Only a little dip as you eat them.

Posted by: Gunslinger at July 12, 2026 04:50 PM (Mxkwh)

82 Hamburger buns should not be raw; they should be toasted and buttered. Have you been hanging out with Chuckie Schumer?!

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at July 12, 2026 04:47 PM (R+iUD)

Bite your tongue!

I am moving toward minimalist when it comes to buns (Not the Brie Larson kind). I want nothing to interfere with my enjoyment of the beef and the toppings.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at July 12, 2026 04:50 PM (l4RKn)

83 75 Posted by: Mr Aspirin Factory at July 12, 2026 04:32 PM (vnlVL)

Thanks for that suggestion. I keep instant ramen in the house because Little makes it for himself a few times a week. Gonna suggest he add a couple pork dumplings in there for a more substantial snack..
Posted by: Joe Kidd at July 12, 2026 04:47 PM (nbLIj)

With current prices, add a microwave scrambled egg, instead. Spray a cup, crack the egg, mix, and microwave between 30-60 seconds (stop at 30 to stir, and then every 15), depending on doneness. Done.

Posted by: Nova Local at July 12, 2026 04:51 PM (tOcjL)

84 >>Place became very touristy because the food was really good but their baked beans were awesome.

Heh, yes. Loved to take out of state colleagues there to experience the feisty waitresses.

Posted by: Lizzy at July 12, 2026 04:51 PM (X8xt3)

85 I can tell you that 70's moms did not have this info pushed on them, and they did not waste time thinking we were in the brink of accidental death at all times.
——-

Me: Laying on bed, thinking Summer Vacation is here! This is awesome!
Mom: “Don’t you want to go outside and play?”
Me: Hm, not necessarily… i mean, maybe.
Mom: “I’ve got a list of chores I need you to get done, after you clean your room .. “

Me: Bye!! See you this Fall, k?

Posted by: Common Tater at July 12, 2026 04:51 PM (IhfQt)

86 I'd have said to add salt and pepper to the egg as well, but instant ramen doesn't need more salt

Posted by: Nova Local at July 12, 2026 04:51 PM (tOcjL)

87 “I don't have a smoker. One of these days I'll get one of those.“

I can recommend an awesome one…

Posted by: Gunslinger, who is honestly NOT a Weber shill! at July 12, 2026 04:52 PM (Mxkwh)

88 I’m doing some beef short ribs now. Put them on at 4 yesterday afternoon. Still not done. In fairness, it’s a serious Fred Flintstone sized rack. Waiting for 205* internal temp. 195* now.

Posted by: Gunslinger at July 12, 2026 04:50 PM (Mxkwh)

That is a long cook! I go 48 hours Sous Vide, but conventionally? Never got close to that. Keep us posted!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at July 12, 2026 04:52 PM (l4RKn)

89 >>Try throwing peach halves on the grill!

Will do!

Posted by: Lizzy at July 12, 2026 04:53 PM (X8xt3)

90 Try throwing peach halves on the grill!
Posted by: nurse ratched. at July 12, 2026 04:49 PM (yEz+x)

Even I like that!

Posted by: Dash my lace wigs! at July 12, 2026 04:53 PM (h7ZuX)

91 >>Me: Laying on bed, thinking Summer Vacation is here! This is awesome!
Mom: “Don’t you want to go outside and play?”
Me: Hm, not necessarily… i mean, maybe.
Mom: “I’ve got a list of chores I need you to get done, after you clean your room .. “

Me: Bye!! See you this Fall, k?
- - - -
Heh, yes!
One summer my mom was on this kick where she would say "Inertia breeds inertia!!" if she caught you sitting inside. You did not want to get the lecture, so you got out early.

Posted by: Lizzy at July 12, 2026 04:55 PM (X8xt3)

92 One summer my mom was on this kick where she would say "Inertia breeds inertia!!"

“A body at rest tends to remain at rest” is part of Science! foundations.

(I’ve always tried to do my part in furtherance of Human knowledge and understanding)

Posted by: Common Tater at July 12, 2026 04:59 PM (IhfQt)

93 Bite your tongue!

I am moving toward minimalist when it comes to buns (Not the Brie Larson kind). I want nothing to interfere with my enjoyment of the beef and the toppings.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at July 12, 2026 04:50 PM (l4RKn)

True, but you have to have one that doesn't fall apart.. Nothing worse than those cheapy buns that don't hold together

Posted by: It's me donna at July 12, 2026 05:00 PM (FtULh)

94 Post surgery diet is low fiber and bland so a lot of chicken and rice for me. However, in a few weeks I’ll be able to have foods that Crohn’s denied me for so long. So I have that going for me. Which is nice.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at July 12, 2026 05:01 PM (u73oe)

95 Try throwing peach halves on the grill!

Will do!
Posted by: Lizzy at July 12, 2026 04:53 PM (X8xt3)

In my fridge, as I write, are two peeled and diced Georgia peaches immersed in red wine. You want to soak em for a few hours at least..

Posted by: Joe Kidd at July 12, 2026 05:02 PM (nbLIj)

96 Lately we've been using the Thomases bagel thins as hamburger buns. Sturdy enough to hold things together but a lot less bready.

Posted by: Lizzy at July 12, 2026 05:03 PM (X8xt3)

97 Doing some jerk turkey meatballs and cilantro lime rice tonight. The meatballs have jerk seasoning and ricotta cheese in them and the rice will have some smoked black beans. A little orange ginger sauce to top the meatballs with. And some cold beer.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at July 12, 2026 05:05 PM (3Ope8)

98 91 >>Me: Laying on bed, thinking Summer Vacation is here! This is awesome!
Mom: “Don’t you want to go outside and play?”
Me: Hm, not necessarily… i mean, maybe.
Mom: “I’ve got a list of chores I need you to get done, after you clean your room .. “

Me: Bye!! See you this Fall, k?
- - - -

Me too. No layabouts allowed. If I didn't find something to do, my mom would find something for me to do. And me watching tv didn't count.

Posted by: LASue at July 12, 2026 05:07 PM (lCppi)

99 Everything from Humble House is good. Everything!

I am particularly fond of mixing their Guajillo and Red Jalapeno sauce with a little honey. That mix is good on pretty much everything: Chicken, Fish, rusty old Buicks...

Posted by: Brewingfrog at July 12, 2026 05:09 PM (9nwRs)

100 The curved edges on the Mac and cheese pan is a good idea. More edge area for more crispy edges.

Posted by: LASue at July 12, 2026 05:10 PM (lCppi)

101 Me too. No layabouts allowed. If I didn't find something to do, my mom would find something for me to do. And me watching tv didn't count.
Posted by: LASue

I don't know how many times I heard that phrase;"If you don't have anything to do I'll find you something to do". LOL

Posted by: Tuna at July 12, 2026 05:10 PM (lJ0H4)

102 My problem with adding bacon to homemade baked beans is this: while it is true that bacon makes almost everything better, it is just as true that almost nothing makes bacon better.

So I keep it as a separate item. This ensures that it is always just the right crispiness, as a sprinkler, as a topping, or as a mix-in.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at July 12, 2026 05:10 PM (kYmoU)

103 I leave my hamburger patties in the fridge until ready to cook. Then they get put on a hot griddle placed over my gas grill, on one side. Seared both sides, quickly. Then moved to the grates, away from the flames for however long it appears to take... maybe a few minutes a side. Maybe a few minutes total. Depends on a lot of things.

How many Martinis I've had is certainly one.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at July 12, 2026 05:12 PM (jehhT)

104 Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at July 12, 2026 05:10 PM (kYmoU)

I crisp the bacon then remove it until the beans are ready to serve. Then I stir it in and it retains some of the crispiness.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at July 12, 2026 05:13 PM (l4RKn)

105 I hear in the Carolinas they use mustard for BBQ and they put vinegar in their slaw. This frightens me.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at July 12, 2026 05:14 PM (RIvkX)

106 My mom used to say

“Only boring people are bored.”

Posted by: nurse ratched. at July 12, 2026 05:15 PM (yEz+x)

107 79 Lizzy,
Try throwing peach halves on the grill!
Posted by: nurse ratched. at July 12, 2026 04:49 PM (yEz+x)
__________

I've never heard of that. Might have to give it a go. I grow Red Haven and White Haven peaches as a hobby. My new grilling experience has been with large Portabello mushrooms. I'll marinade them overnight in a basalmic ving, and squeezed fresh orange....then grill them the next day and finish off with some smoked Gouda on top. I'm reluctant to say I have some Vegan friends and this is as far as I'll go to accomodate them at a bar-b-que. But the Portabello grilled is rather tasty.

Posted by: Orson at July 12, 2026 05:15 PM (dIske)

108 Chicken & Rice, everytime I make it, I usually decide I could eat that everyday. Brown rice, flavorful and fluffy, infused with chickeny flavah.

Say what you will about Saddam, he chose that for his last meal, before he was hanged.

Posted by: Common Tater at July 12, 2026 05:15 PM (IhfQt)

109 1 can baked beans
1 can yellow kernel corn (drained)
1 handful cooked bacon crumbles

Mix in a large bowl
Cover and heat in microwave oven.

You're welcome.

Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at July 12, 2026 05:16 PM (4mmkh)

110 Durgin Park. The restaurant was originally ~~founded in the 1800s~~ established before you were born

Fixed for historical accuracy.

IYKYK

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at July 12, 2026 05:18 PM (Wnv9h)

111 Mrs. F. does not make mac n cheese properly. Thinks it should be crispy and dry. Not creamy and smooth. If I want it the right way I have to make it myself.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at July 12, 2026 05:18 PM (RIvkX)

112 Lately we've been using the Thomases bagel thins as hamburger buns. Sturdy enough to hold things together but a lot less bready.
Posted by: Lizzy at July 12, 2026 05:03 PM (X8xt3

Sounds great. I’m going to try that in about two hours with a smash burger.

Posted by: Pete Bogs Agentic alter ego at July 12, 2026 05:18 PM (bXtdx)

113 “ …crisp the bacon then remove it until the beans are ready to serve. Then I stir it in and it retains some of the crispiness”

This is the way, or one could split the difference, too. I find carmelized onion improves just about any dish, but I like the oniony crunchiness of onions, too. So I often take a large onion and carmelize half, and reserve the other half for just at the end, chopped fine, for the best of both worlds.

Posted by: Common Tater at July 12, 2026 05:19 PM (IhfQt)

114
There is a smashburger food truck in our small town about once a month.

We love them and want to cook them at home.

Does anyone grill them? We have read recipes that say grill them or cook them in the oven.

Posted by: four seasons at July 12, 2026 05:23 PM (/QHx4)

115 Does anyone grill them? We have read recipes that say grill them or cook them in the oven.

Posted by: four seasons at July 12, 2026 05:23 PM (/QHx4)

Griddling is generally considered to be the way. Blackstone grill or a cast iron skillet

Posted by: Pete Bogs Agentic alter ego at July 12, 2026 05:26 PM (bXtdx)

116 Does anyone grill them? We have read recipes that say grill them or cook them in the oven.

Posted by: four seasons

You need to be able to squish them. I don't know how to smash on a grill, unless you get a plate of steel to lay over the grills.

Posted by: AZ deplorable moron at July 12, 2026 05:26 PM (NnhvP)

117
Thanks. We thought they would fall apart on the grill.

Posted by: four seasons at July 12, 2026 05:28 PM (/QHx4)

118 To make a smashburger one must have a griddle on which to smash the burger.

A grill will just let the burger get smashed down into the fire. Do not smash burgers on your grill. Messy!

Posted by: San Franpsycho at July 12, 2026 05:28 PM (RIvkX)

119 Around 40 years ago, I took some friends from my small (around 500) hometown in Pennsylvania to Durgin Park for dinner. Asked the waitress if we could see the kitchen. She allowed it and I was shocked. There was about 4" of sawdust on the floor! To top it off, when my friends meal arrived, the order slip was located under the mashed potatoes. Needless to say, they were not impressed.

Posted by: Admirale's Mate at July 12, 2026 05:31 PM (/enuJ)

120 67 A little tip I learned from Chef Andrew Gruel I tried last night. He recommends freezing hamburger patties before putting them on the grill. This allows the outside of the burger to get a good char while the inside stays juicy and cooks slowly thanks to the frozen meet and doesn't get overcooked and dry.
Tried it last night and it worked great. Just don't make your burgers too thin.
Posted by: JackStraw at July 12, 2026 04:34 PM

JackStraw, that works well with steak, too! I have two frozen steak tips, one ear of corn in aluminum foil, and asparagus on the grill right now.

Posted by: RI Red at July 12, 2026 05:31 PM (30Gj0)

121 You could always grow some nice tomatoes right beside your patch of garlic plants!

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at July 12, 2026 05:31 PM (HlyYF)

122 I can’t get into mac n cheese. Maybe it’s because I have horrific flashbacks to eating the dogshit ready-mixed dust crap — and not even the brand-name stuff — by the ton when I was a poor college student.

Posted by: Elric the Blade at July 12, 2026 05:35 PM (bAJQW)

123 I don't know how many times I heard that phrase;"If you don't have anything to do I'll find you something to do". LOL
Posted by: Tuna at July 12, 2026 05:10 PM (lJ0H4)
___

LOL

That's why I was usually gone as soon as daylight came.

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at July 12, 2026 05:35 PM (7h63r)

124 ot: Lindsay Graham up-stages entire Senate for last time.

Posted by: DaveA at July 12, 2026 05:36 PM (FhXTo)

125 Lizzy, our kids were born '76 & '80. When we finally moved into our first house, we were very close to a big bayou. One day the boys told me they were bored. I told them to go play in the bayou. They looked at me horrified and never told me they were bored again! I was NOT a helicopter Mom.

Posted by: DanMa'am at July 12, 2026 05:38 PM (8uzBS)

126 >>JackStraw, that works well with steak, too! I have two frozen steak tips, one ear of corn in aluminum foil, and asparagus on the grill right now.

Sounds about perfect. One of the best parts of grilling season is veggies like corn on the cob and asparagus on the grill.

Posted by: JackStraw at July 12, 2026 05:38 PM (viF8m)

127 Dildo .. ain't this great !!! This Mac and Cheese.

No. Its not. Even Smoked.

Posted by: Boss Pedal at July 12, 2026 05:38 PM (+t3Ro)

128
Our outdoor therometer is at 105 degrees which is strange here in SW Wyoming.
Went to the grocery this morning and bought fixings for lots of cold salads.

Posted by: four seasons at July 12, 2026 05:39 PM (/QHx4)

129 For a really good burger, try to throw on a slap of prosciutto on top instead of salt. The prosciutto is usually salty enough. I usually only add some thin-sliced onion, a nice fresh bun, and call it a day. These burgers with 500 ingredients aren’t my jive.

Posted by: Elric the Blade at July 12, 2026 05:39 PM (bAJQW)

130 122 I can’t get into mac n cheese. Maybe it’s because I have horrific flashbacks to eating the dogshit ready-mixed dust crap — and not even the brand-name stuff — by the ton when I was a poor college student.

Posted by: Elric the Blade at July 12, 2026 05:35 PM

I have just the opposite reaction.

I can happily scarf down half a bowl of Aldi Mac & Cheese or ramen, and still fondly remember my starving student days.

Posted by: Pillage Idiot at July 12, 2026 05:40 PM (HlyYF)

131 Smash burgers on a hot griddle. This is the way.

Either use a cast iron pan on the grill, or a cast iron, flat griddle (like for camping) that you can lay down on the grates so it gets hot.

I have a flat one. Big enough for about 5 "full size" burger patties. It get freaking hot. Cooks smash burgers in about 2 minutes.

Posted by: Martini Farmer at July 12, 2026 05:41 PM (jehhT)

132 PEACHES ON THE GRILL ... Fresh peaches, plums, and nectarines can be taken up a notch when cut in half and marinated overnight in some Grand Marnier mixed with a little of your favorite sweet spice (cinnamon, nutmeg, cardamom, etc.) ... Drain fruit from marinade, pat dry, and set aside ... Make a slightly thickened sauce from the reserved marinade by simmering and, if desired, adding a little brown sugar ... Grill fruits gently (just until warmed throughout), plate skin side down, top with vanilla ice cream, and drizzle with the thickened sauce ... YUM!

Posted by: Kathy at July 12, 2026 05:41 PM (MOK4W)

133 A friend gifted me some kale, swiss chard and basil. I made Lemony Tuscan White Bean and Kale Soup (will gift back, it's good). Then I decided it needed bread but too late for true sourdough so I found a sourdough starter bread recipe (the dough is a complete wet mess). It's in the oven now so jury is out. Pistachio Pesto in a bit, my feet hurt.

Posted by: ChE99 at July 12, 2026 05:41 PM (KgC04)

134 When I had octopus sushi it was like chewing rubber. I can’t imagine an octopus tentacle is that great either.

Posted by: Cow Demon at July 12, 2026 05:41 PM (4g5V+)

135 One of my "Favorite Memories" are the two fat fucks that constantly pulled knives on the way home from the bus stop.

And my fat cousin that ran, as soon as he saw the knives.

And my stupid drunk fucking Dad and his drunk Cousin ... because "Of Course We'll Have a Talk" bullshit from back in the ... yes ... Boomer Era.

And having to fight those kids every damn day after that.

Posted by: Boss Pedal at July 12, 2026 05:42 PM (+t3Ro)

136
Mac and cheese should be creamy.

It's not something people eat on a regular basis so it should not be dry.

Posted by: four seasons at July 12, 2026 05:44 PM (/QHx4)

137 >>I can happily scarf down half a bowl of Aldi Mac & Cheese or ramen, and still fondly remember my starving student days.

Senior year in college I rented a big old (crappy) house with other guys. One guy lived almost entirely on Kraft Mac 'n Cheese and popcorn.

Posted by: JackStraw at July 12, 2026 05:44 PM (viF8m)

138 122 I can’t get into mac n cheese. Maybe it’s because I have horrific flashbacks to eating the dogshit ready-mixed dust crap — and not even the brand-name stuff — by the ton when I was a poor college student.
Posted by: Elric the Blade at July 12, 2026 05:35 PM (bAJQW)

Gotta go homemade.

Back in the day, my mother would go homemade for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Even better, she would, when these were available, use Texas shaped pasta - noodles in the outline of Texas - in the Mac and cheese. That right there is the way to go.

Posted by: Cow Demon at July 12, 2026 05:49 PM (4g5V+)

139 It's not something people eat on a regular basis so it should not be dry.

Posted by: four seasons at July 12, 2026 05:44 PM (/QHx4)
__

This^

How you doin', girl?

Posted by: SMH at God's mercy at July 12, 2026 05:49 PM (7h63r)

140 ? I made the food thread? Will wonders never cease.

And, I'm laughing at the "I can't stomach Mac N Cheese because...." remarks.

Remember, you've not had real Mac N Cheese until you try it the way I make it. Trust me! hahahahaha....I crack myself up.

If'n one doesn't like Mac N Cheese that's just the way it is. It's like trying to sell a Chevy to a Ford guy. Won't happen.

Posted by: Blake - semi lurker in marginal standing at July 12, 2026 05:50 PM (UJMvS)

141
SMH,

We are well.

We have been reading about the flooding. We have been concerned about ya'll.

Posted by: four seasons at July 12, 2026 05:51 PM (/QHx4)

142
It’s a challenge cooking for one and not wasting food.
Posted by: nurse ratched. at July 12, 2026 04:46 PM (yEz+x)

Gotta learn to love leftovers.

I’d make days worth of food (say, stew or chili) in a crock pot and eat down the contents over a week or so.

Posted by: Cow Demon at July 12, 2026 05:53 PM (4g5V+)

143 What is this term, 'smash burger'? Haven't people been doing this for decades? Just a trendy way to charge you more for a simple skillet hamburger.

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at July 12, 2026 05:54 PM (sYM3s)

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