Mid-Morning Art Thread

Friar Pedro Shoots El Maragato as His Horse Runs Off
Francisco José de Goya y Lucientes

Posted by: CBD at 09:30 AM

Comments

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1 FIRST!!!!!

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:30 AM (X0axn)

2 Straight up aiming for the bunghole.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:30 AM (X0axn)

3 Good thing he's facing the other way.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:31 AM (X0axn)

4 I shoot-a you in-a you ass.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 04, 2026 09:31 AM (snZF9)

5 Nooded.

Posted by: Nazdar at June 04, 2026 09:31 AM (NcvvS)

6 Esponja!

Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at June 04, 2026 09:31 AM (nY0m2)

7 Nooded.
Posted by: Nazdar at June 04, 2026 09:31 AM (NcvvS)

Thanks for that.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:31 AM (X0axn)

8 That's gay

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at June 04, 2026 09:31 AM (Kt19C)

9 this is how we treat horse rustlers 'round here

Posted by: Otto Penn at June 04, 2026 09:32 AM (sJHOI)

10
Horse, therefore art.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 04, 2026 09:32 AM (O0L8i)

11 Hands up, don't shoot!

Posted by: Debby Doberman Schultz at June 04, 2026 09:32 AM (0nHVk)

12 "But Christians are supposed to always be peaceful!"

Posted by: NR Pax at June 04, 2026 09:32 AM (svLOV)

13 Shot him right in the ass, too. That'll teach him.

Posted by: From about That Time at June 04, 2026 09:32 AM (sl73Y)

14 It would help to know the story behind this painting.

*goes looking*

Posted by: Tuna at June 04, 2026 09:32 AM (lJ0H4)

15 A flintlock.

Hope he doesn't miss. It takes a minute to reload.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:32 AM (X0axn)

16 Horse is all, "f*ck this sh!t"

Posted by: Otto Penn at June 04, 2026 09:33 AM (sJHOI)

17 In the summer of 1806 in Spain, on the run after a prison escape, the dreaded bandit El Maragato overtook a family in their home and held them hostage. Among the family members was Pedro de Zaldivia, a lay Franciscan brother who stopped by the house to beg for alms. The humble monk ended up turning the tables on his captor, seizing El Maragato’s riﬂe and shooting him in the thigh to subdue him before he could grab another gun from his horse. The story of the heroic friar swept through Spain, not only via reports in newspapers and pamphlets but also in ballads and prints.

Although at the time Francisco Goya was chief painter to the Spanish king, he was interested in the range of human experience, including current events, and the tale of Zaldivia and El Maragato evidently captured his imagination

Posted by: 18-1 at June 04, 2026 09:33 AM (sKqQm)

18 The guy was a horse botherer.
--Friar Pedro

Posted by: No Name Today at June 04, 2026 09:33 AM (8mulE)

19 Friar Pete apparently has not been appraised of the disposal of just war theory.

Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at June 04, 2026 09:33 AM (nY0m2)

20 that's a cool friar right there

used to shoot horse thieves! should bring that back (the analogue is car thieves)

Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:33 AM (j+aD2)

21 "Say 'ello to my little frien!'"

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:33 AM (X0axn)

22 >>Thanks for that.

My pleasure, and congratulations on the FIRST!

Posted by: Nazdar at June 04, 2026 09:33 AM (NcvvS)

23
General Küster: He ran off with a small friar.

Professor Fate: Leslie ran off with a chicken?

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 04, 2026 09:34 AM (O0L8i)

24 Dude's got a Dan Marino ass, if you miss that you should have your weapon confiscated

Posted by: Otto Penn at June 04, 2026 09:34 AM (sJHOI)

25 Goya is tied for my favorite painter ever

this is a great pick! lots to discuss

Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:34 AM (j+aD2)

26 Musta tried to drink the holy water.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:35 AM (X0axn)

27 ‘the dreaded bandit El Maragato‘ looks about as tall and fearsome as El Chapo

Posted by: Elric the Blade at June 04, 2026 09:35 AM (Biz1s)

28
Frito bandito!

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 04, 2026 09:35 AM (O0L8i)

29 Domo Maragato. Domo. Domo.

Posted by: Delurker at June 04, 2026 09:35 AM (gtcuf)

30 About the history behind the painting:

https://tinyurl.com/3uwz9twr

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at June 04, 2026 09:35 AM (OYsYV)

31 ...little bastard shot me in the ass!

Posted by: The Waco Kid at June 04, 2026 09:35 AM (oqH4h)

32 I figured it was Mexico,

Posted by: Otto Penn at June 04, 2026 09:35 AM (sJHOI)

33 I'll have to admit. All the time spent watching the NFL over the years, I never really paid all that much attention to Dan Marino's ass.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:36 AM (X0axn)

34
So this is the Gun Thread?

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 04, 2026 09:36 AM (O0L8i)

35 13 Shot him right in the ass, too. That'll teach him.

Posted by: From about That Time at June 04, 2026 09:32 AM (sl73Y)

Is he the man with two ass holes now?

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 09:36 AM (l3cgK)

36 Rifle packing Friar > Air Fryer > Normal Friar

Posted by: 18-1 at June 04, 2026 09:36 AM (sKqQm)

37 Hands up, don't shoot

Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 09:37 AM (oknh1)

38 Friars didn't play back then.

Posted by: Drunken Yoda at June 04, 2026 09:37 AM (lBlv7)

39 Not so fast, El Guapo! Or I'll pump you so full of lead you'll be using your dick for a pencil!

Posted by: Lucky Day at June 04, 2026 09:37 AM (wVcYX)

40 My pleasure, and congratulations on the FIRST!
Posted by: Nazdar at June 04, 2026 09:33 AM (NcvvS)

*fistbump*

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:37 AM (X0axn)

41 I'll have to admit. All the time spent watching the NFL over the years, I never really paid all that much attention to Dan Marino's ass.

I always check their pants...you know...in case there are some fashion ideas for Reggie or I since we are both manly men as well

Posted by: Barack Obama at June 04, 2026 09:37 AM (sKqQm)

42 Action scenes this week!

Nice detail of the powder flash as the gun fires. The friar looks rather casual about it, as if he does this sort of thing often. "It's Thursday, another bandit. Oh well."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 04, 2026 09:37 AM (wzUl9)

43 Not only was he a great painter, but his beans are really good, too.

Posted by: Bulg at June 04, 2026 09:37 AM (77rzZ)

44 17 In the summer of 1806 in Spain, on the run after a prison escape, the dreaded bandit El Maragato overtook a family in their home and held them hostage. Among the family members was Pedro de Zaldivia, a lay Franciscan brother who stopped by the house to beg for alms. The humble monk ended up turning the tables on his captor, seizing El Maragato’s riﬂe and shooting him in the thigh to subdue him before he could grab another gun from his horse. The story of the heroic friar swept through Spain, not only via reports in newspapers and pamphlets but also in ballads and prints.

Although at the time Francisco Goya was chief painter to the Spanish king, he was interested in the range of human experience, including current events, and the tale of Zaldivia and El Maragato evidently captured his imagination

Posted by: 18-1 at June 04, 2026 09:33 AM (sKqQm)

It's one in a series of 6 paintings on the event...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 09:38 AM (l3cgK)

45 Fen that article was super weird

was that AI generated or just dummy-generated?!?!

sorry not to pick on you the Internet just sucks now

Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:38 AM (j+aD2)

46 Fasting gives you an itchy trigger finger

Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 09:38 AM (oknh1)

47 Did the bandit die of his wound, or did he go to the gallows?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at June 04, 2026 09:39 AM (1z8ji)

48 Friar Pedro was angry that day, my friends.

Posted by: George Costanza at June 04, 2026 09:39 AM (2Ez/1)

49 Goya is tied for my favorite painter ever"

And their Frijoles negros are pretty decent for canned goods...

Posted by: man at June 04, 2026 09:39 AM (XuXeR)

50 Tuco's brother finally had enough of his shit.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at June 04, 2026 09:39 AM (XvL8K)

51
For A Few Pesos More

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 04, 2026 09:39 AM (O0L8i)

52 Oh good. I can just repurpose yesterday's limertick

Always Know What's Beyond Your Target - a limerick

The friar shot a bullet into the air
It fell to earth he knew not where
But to his great chagrin
It landed right within
The fleshy part of Maragato's derriere!

Posted by: muldoon at June 04, 2026 09:39 AM (qgHp7)

53 Is he the man with two ass holes now?
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026

***
Yeah, Rob Reiner's sequel to his father's The Man With Two Brains never got out of development.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 04, 2026 09:40 AM (wzUl9)

54 I shoot-a you in-a you ass.
Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 04, 2026 09:31 AM (snZF9)

My dad bought me my first car from a guy that sounded EXACTLY like Father Guido Sarducci.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:40 AM (X0axn)

55 47 Did the bandit die of his wound, or did he go to the gallows?

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at June 04, 2026 09:39 AM (1z8ji)

Whatever happened, the bandit didn't take it sitting down!

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 09:40 AM (l3cgK)

56 Violent week, huh, CBD?

Posted by: Lizzy at June 04, 2026 09:41 AM (X8xt3)

57 Esponja!
Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at June 04, 2026 09:31 AM (nY0m2)

*fistbump*

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:41 AM (X0axn)

58 Painting needs a sound track by Ennio Morricone.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at June 04, 2026 09:41 AM (1z8ji)

59
Now, time for Vespers.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 04, 2026 09:41 AM (O0L8i)

60 Wow- I wish I owned this one. I'd hang it in my office at home, just for inspiration.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at June 04, 2026 09:41 AM (tKFiK)

61 Did the bandit die of his wound, or did he go to the gallows?
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at June 04, 2026

***]
A tossup. In 1806 there was no penicillin. He might have had to get the leg amputated if gangrene set in, or the gangrene might have killed him.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 04, 2026 09:41 AM (wzUl9)

62
"Have Gun, Will Shoot Dicks" was the worst western cowboy show of 1960s TV.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 04, 2026 09:42 AM (iJfKG)

63 Friar? More like Fry Him, amirite?

Posted by: Delurker at June 04, 2026 09:42 AM (gtcuf)

64 How could you possibly miss at that range?

Posted by: Martini Farmer at June 04, 2026 09:43 AM (jehhT)

65 The Friar was upset that the British "Justice system" had repeatedly released Maragato, and so he took justice into his own hands.

Posted by: Wally at June 04, 2026 09:43 AM (dMKlf)

66 Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:38 AM (j+aD2)

I think it was by a real person. His website talks about his background in the church and that he had been a hospital chaplain.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at June 04, 2026 09:43 AM (OYsYV)

67 Aim small, miss small.

Posted by: Friar Pedro at June 04, 2026 09:43 AM (wVcYX)

68 Buy a shotgun! Buy a shotgun!

Posted by: Creepy Joe at June 04, 2026 09:43 AM (2Ez/1)

69 Ready, aim, friar!

I'll show myself out. Thank you, CBD

Posted by: callsign claymore at June 04, 2026 09:43 AM (/6r4m)

70 Straight up aiming for the bunghole.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:30 AM (X0axn)

https://youtu.be/Diq0aDJM8K4

Posted by: I used to have a different nic at June 04, 2026 09:43 AM (ExV1e)

71 He got shot in the butt-ocks.

Posted by: Forrest Gump at June 04, 2026 09:43 AM (HyJZu)

72 Looks more like a 'shoot 'im in the ass' than anything else … but I could be wrong, yes … ? And he's not shooting even close to the horse - but then, why would he? The horse is innocent and pure, and is only looking for lonely female horses to romp with over the meadows … and a bit of 'other stuff' that makes 'em whinny …

Posted by: Dr_No at June 04, 2026 09:43 AM (ayRl+)

73 >>My dad bought me my first car from a guy that sounded EXACTLY like Father Guido Sarducci.

Heh, so funny!

Posted by: Lizzy at June 04, 2026 09:44 AM (X8xt3)

74 I hope we're not making a habit of friar paintings. I'm not cowl with that.

Posted by: Delurker at June 04, 2026 09:44 AM (gtcuf)

75 64 How could you possibly miss at that range?
Posted by: Martini Farmer at June 04, 2026 09:43 AM (jehhT)

Pffft.

Posted by: Any given Imperial Storm Trooper at June 04, 2026 09:44 AM (HyJZu)

76 The prior friar shot higher.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at June 04, 2026 09:44 AM (1z8ji)

77 Painting needs a sound track by Ennio Morricone."

By the Ukulele Orchestra?

Posted by: man at June 04, 2026 09:44 AM (XuXeR)

78 "Have Gun, Will Shoot Dicks" was the worst western cowboy show of 1960s TV.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 04, 2026

***
"Tonight, on Have Gun -- Will Travel, Paladin (Richard Boone) shoots a bandit (Vito Scotti) in the leg, then teaches him to live with his crutches."

Doesn't sound quite right. . . .

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 04, 2026 09:44 AM (wzUl9)

79 Execution: Following his capture, Pedro Piñero was taken to Madrid. He was hanged and dismembered on August 18, 1806, with pieces of his body displayed along the roads to deter other outlaws

Posted by: 18-1 at June 04, 2026 09:45 AM (sKqQm)

80 He was just a person experiencing horselessness.

Posted by: Karen McAwfl at June 04, 2026 09:45 AM (2Ez/1)

81

On April 26, 1806, Pedro Pifiero, a notorious and much feared bandit, escaped over a 44-foot wall from the Spanish arsenal of Cartagena, where he had been held originally under sentence of death. Roaming the countryside and once again stealing from both the rich and the poor, this el Maragato, as he was called after his birthplace in the mountains of the Maragatexia, turned up on June 10 at the home of a forest worker in the Verdugal. Holding him, his wife and three children, and two other men at gunpoint, he calmly helped himself to the family's dinner. Having eaten "very slowly and with much coolness and serenity of mind," the bandit then ordered the worker to saddle a fresh horse, which he loaded with two guns he had acquired in previous robberies...(cont)

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 09:45 AM (l3cgK)

82 A third gun he kept trained on the worker to herd him back into the house where the others were cowering in fear. What the bandit's intentions were, however, remains unknown, for at that moment, Friar Pedro Zaldivia, a Franciscan lay brother of the Barefoot Order of San Pedro de Aleantara, came begging for his monastery, the Convento del Rosario in nearby Oropesa. Soon, however, he, too, was one of the captives. But for all his appearance of meekness and humility, the young monk had no intentions of remaining a victim. Instead, he became the hero of a morality play that soon would be celebrated all over Spain, from court to countryside...(cont)

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 09:46 AM (l3cgK)

83 Do I hear a voice calling out 'Mister Taggett! Mister Taggett!'? Mel Brooks has surreptitiously entered the image field …

Posted by: Dr_No at June 04, 2026 09:46 AM (ayRl+)

84 Execution: Following his capture, Pedro Piñero was taken to Madrid. He was hanged and dismembered on August 18, 1806, with pieces of his body displayed along the roads to deter other outlaws
Posted by: 18-1 at June 04, 2026

***
Somebody knew his ancient Roman history!

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 04, 2026 09:46 AM (wzUl9)

85 Maragato, whose boots had become worn during his wanderings around the countryside, ordered one of the men in the room to give him his. Friar Pedro, however, told Maragato that he had a far better pair among the alms he had collected for the poor. With Maragato's gun trained on him, Friar Pedro rummaged in the saddlebags he carried on his shoulders and finally produced the boots. He did not give them to Maragato, however, but tricked him into reaching out his left hand to take them. When Maragato did so Pedro grabbed the barrel of the gun and, after a struggle, succeeded in wresting it from the bandit. Maragato dashed to his horse for his other two guns, but again Friar Pedro was too clever. "Accidentally" bumping the horse, he frightened it and it ran away. Maragato also ran, but Friar Pedro was determined that he should be brought to justice. Taking careful aim at his legs so as not to kill him, he fired a charge of a bullet, two lead pieces, and some birdshot. His aim was a little high, and the charge lodged in Maragato's right buttock...(cont)

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 09:46 AM (l3cgK)

86 Monk ain't no punk

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 09:46 AM (WNOcj)

87 Article was date stamped 2005 Orchid. Not that that means anything but it's a clue. I actually miss the way the internet was when it was THAT kind of dumb.

Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 09:46 AM (oknh1)

88 Finding a cord that "Providence had supplied" (perhaps the cincture he wore around his waist with its three special knots to signify his vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience), Friar Pedro bound Maragato's hands and feet. Later, when he discovered how heavily his prisoner was bleeding, he loosed them. Dragging Maragato into the shade where he could escape the noonday heat, he protected him from the wrath of the others, who, having previously stood by and watched, now wished to beat up the bandit when he was safely tied and harmless. Meanwhile, word of the bandit's capture spread quickly and an angry crowd gathered. Maragato begged the friar to finish him off so that he would not have to return to jail and almost certainly the gallows but Friar Pedro refused. That was God's domain, he said. Finally, at 11 o'clock that night, the police arrived and the bandit and the friar returned to Oropesa, one to jail, the other to his monastery.

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 09:46 AM (l3cgK)

89
Heh, so funny!
Posted by: Lizzy at June 04, 2026 09:44 AM (X8xt3)

Once I pointed it out to my dad, he couldn't unhear it and had to hold himself back from laughing the rest of the transaction.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:46 AM (X0axn)

90
The role of Friar Pedro will be played by Clint Eastwood.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 04, 2026 09:46 AM (O0L8i)

91 87 Article was date stamped 2005 Orchid. Not that that means anything but it's a clue. I actually miss the way the internet was when it was THAT kind of dumb.

lol good point!

Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:47 AM (j+aD2)

92 Execution: Following his capture, Pedro Piñero was taken to Madrid. He was hanged and dismembered on August 18, 1806, with pieces of his body displayed along the roads to deter other outlaws
Posted by: 18-1 at June 04, 2026 09:45 AM (sKqQm)

The old ways were best ways. Before we became so civilized.

Posted by: Count de Monet at June 04, 2026 09:47 AM (wVcYX)

93 I guess the "neighbor with a penis" was happy to be shot in the ass instead.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:47 AM (X0axn)

94 15 A flintlock.

Hope he doesn't miss. It takes a minute to reload.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:32 AM (X0axn)

Apparently he clubbed him with the stock after the bandit was down.

https://tinyurl.com/yzut2pnm

Posted by: Martbell at June 04, 2026 09:47 AM (RV7qC)

95 I’m tonsure how I feel about friar puns.

Posted by: Bulg at June 04, 2026 09:47 AM (77rzZ)

96 The role of Friar Pedro will be played by Clint Eastwood.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 04, 2026 09:46 AM (O0L8i)

"Preacher!!!! PREACHER!!!!"

- - - - - - Horny 14 year old

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 09:48 AM (X0axn)

97 A bullet, two lead pieces, and some birdshot walk into a bar.

Posted by: Delurker at June 04, 2026 09:48 AM (gtcuf)

98 The trouble with the Spanish is, when they go crazy they REALLY go crazy. Worse than Italians!

but from this comes truly great art

next maybe a look at Velasquez? Very different than Goya but with the same fire burning

Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:49 AM (j+aD2)

99
Family Feud - a limerick

It's Festus Hagan, bless his ol' heart
The feud was on right from the start
His cousin came and shot him
Right in his saggy bottom...

...but only the "hangy down" part

IYKYK

Posted by: muldoon at June 04, 2026 09:49 AM (qgHp7)

100 Somebody knew his ancient Roman history!
Them old greek homos

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at June 04, 2026 09:49 AM (Kt19C)

101 Spain seems like a lazy country.

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 09:49 AM (WNOcj)

102 Not what I expected from a Goya painting. The scene is obviously known to his audience, a true event. Compared to the portraits of the Spanish royal family and other works, this looks crude, almost cartoonish, like something from a western dime novel. It wouldn't get noticed if it wasn't for the artist. Perhaps it's silly, but the friar's foot on the left of the image is at an odd angle and that annoyed me. At least the rifle is correct for the period.

Have to believe that Frederick Remington would have done a better job of the scene.

Posted by: JTB at June 04, 2026 09:50 AM (yTvNw)

103
The shooting of El Maragato set off widespread demonstrations. Public health experts said that these were justified despite the cholera epidemic quarantine.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 04, 2026 09:50 AM (O0L8i)

104 Do I like this art? Ehh, it's a crapshoot.

Posted by: gKWVE at June 04, 2026 09:50 AM (gKWVE)

105 The role of Friar Pedro will be played by Clint Eastwood.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 04, 2026

***
"Get away from my mission!"

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 04, 2026 09:50 AM (wzUl9)

106 Pedro Piñero was hanged and dismembered on August 18, 1806, with pieces of his body displayed along the roads to deter other outlaws.

Now, normally a man dies after all that, but Pedro was displayed in a plce

Posted by: callsign claymore at June 04, 2026 09:50 AM (/6r4m)

107 ooh it's after 100!

you guys have to watch Widows Bay

Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:51 AM (j+aD2)

108 >>The shooting of El Maragato set off widespread demonstrations. Public health experts said that these were justified despite the cholera epidemic quarantine.

There was no love in the time of cholera?

Posted by: Lizzy at June 04, 2026 09:51 AM (X8xt3)

109 Might hang it in a hunting lodge.

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 09:52 AM (WNOcj)

110 oh and also before my calls ... there's this weird thing going around about minifigs and bricks or something and a YouTube and I can't understand it at all

certainly not well enough to pick a side. but the story is interesting? also has a mormon angle

Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:52 AM (j+aD2)

111 The trouble with the Spanish is, when they go crazy they REALLY go crazy. Worse than Italians!
...

Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:49 AM (j+aD2)

They say the ladies are insane there,
and they sure know how to use it.

Posted by: Count de Monet at June 04, 2026 09:52 AM (wVcYX)

112 But he was running away!

Posted by: Smooth Brined Spanish lefty, 1806 at June 04, 2026 09:52 AM (IqKsT)

113 The article Fen linked says the bandit was hanged, and the monk got a pension from the king.
Sometimes things work out.

Posted by: From about That Time at June 04, 2026 09:52 AM (sl73Y)

114 112 But he was running away!

and his IQ was only 77!!!

Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:53 AM (j+aD2)

115 This painting showed up on that other more vibrant *ahem* Art Thread last week headlined "The Hot Air Friar".

Posted by: muldoon at June 04, 2026 09:53 AM (qgHp7)

116 103
The shooting of El Maragato set off widespread demonstrations. Public health experts said that these were justified despite the cholera epidemic quarantine.
Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 04, 2026 09:50 AM (O0L8i)

Bandits who only robbed the rich were more likely to become folk heroes. (Class envy goes waaaay back). This El Maragato robbed rich and poor alike and so no one was sad to see him hang.

Posted by: Martbell at June 04, 2026 09:53 AM (RV7qC)

117 >>Might hang it in a hunting lodge.

"Would hang"
"Hang who?"

Posted by: Lizzy at June 04, 2026 09:53 AM (X8xt3)

118 where the ground was ... sour.

Posted by: callsign claymore at June 04, 2026 09:54 AM (/6r4m)

119 Domo Maragato Mr. Got Shot-o

Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 09:54 AM (oknh1)

120 Posted by: muldoon at June 04, 2026 09:53 AM (qgHp7)

You got a twofer out of that pun.

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 09:54 AM (WNOcj)

121 If that beggar got on horseback he'd ride to hell. So I shot him. - Friar

Posted by: Rex B at June 04, 2026 09:55 AM (rgnea)

122 10/10 would hang.

Would also hang the painting

Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 09:55 AM (oknh1)

123 Dang it. One early "enter" and the Pet Sematary line was blown.

Posted by: callsign claymore at June 04, 2026 09:55 AM (/6r4m)

124 This painting showed up on that other more vibrant *ahem* Art Thread last week headlined "The Hot Air Friar".
Posted by: muldoon at June 04, 2026 09:53 AM (qgHp7)

That's deep

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 09:55 AM (WNOcj)

125 >>Domo Maragato Mr. Got Shot-o

Heh.

The jig is up, the news is out
They finally found me
The renegade who had it made
Retrieved for a bounty
Nevermore to go astray
This'll be the end today of the wanted man

Posted by: Lizzy at June 04, 2026 09:55 AM (X8xt3)

126 Pedro Piñero was hanged and dismembered on August 18, 1806, with pieces of his body displayed along the roads to deter other outlaws.

*********

Rest in Pieces...

Posted by: muldoon at June 04, 2026 09:56 AM (qgHp7)

127 Di-rectly in the buttocks.

Posted by: Forrest Gump at June 04, 2026 09:56 AM (2Ez/1)

128 holy sheep. the lady who wrote/illustrated Persepolis killed herself. only 56 years old.

tragic wtf

Marjane Satrapi

Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:57 AM (j+aD2)

129 Were all the friars named Pedro?

Posted by: dantesed at June 04, 2026 09:57 AM (Oy/m2)

130 Retrieved for a bounty

Looks more like he got retrieved by the booty

Posted by: gKWVE at June 04, 2026 09:57 AM (gKWVE)

131 Goya turned a bit insane later on. I think Stan got a hold of him.

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 09:58 AM (WNOcj)

132 But they didn't burn his entrails and privates before his eyes, before hanging him, cutting him down, hanging him again, dragging him through the streets behind a horse, drawing and quartering him, and displaying his head on a pike on London Bridge?

Pikers.

Posted by: The Brits, when they had bollocks at June 04, 2026 09:58 AM (gtcuf)

133 You’d think they would have come up with a better treatment for hemorrhoids.

Posted by: Bulg at June 04, 2026 09:58 AM (77rzZ)

134 "I was born the son of a lawless man --
Always spoke my mind with a gun in my hand --"
( -- Pedro the Bandit, RIP)

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 04, 2026 09:58 AM (wzUl9)

135 Oh no! I saw the Persepolis cartoon and the (better) Voices.
Satrapi did have a host of Issues as you can tell from both.

Posted by: gKWVE at June 04, 2026 09:59 AM (gKWVE)

136 "Accused and tried and told to hang;
I was nowhere in sight when the church bells rang.
Never was the kind to do as I was told;
Gonna ride like the wind before I get old . . ."

No more riding for you, Pedro, my son!

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 04, 2026 10:00 AM (wzUl9)

137 Did this happen in Reno?
Did he just want to see him die?

Posted by: The Man In Black at June 04, 2026 10:00 AM (2Ez/1)

138 Posted by: Black Orchid (j+aD2) at June 04, 2026 09:57 AM (j+aD2)

So brutal for anyone who loves you.

Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 10:01 AM (oknh1)

139 Did he just want to see him die?
Posted by: The Man In Black at June 04, 2026 10:00 AM (2Ez

Maybe to see him limp.

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:02 AM (WNOcj)

140 he fired a charge of a bullet, two lead pieces, and some birdshot

This type of load is known as 'buck and ball'.

For more fascinating information like this, join us every Sunday evening on the Gun Thread. CBD is often there, and is slowly learning to embrace .45 ACP and all things JMB (PBUH); you can too!

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 04, 2026 10:03 AM (0sNs1)

141
"You shot me in the back!"
Raylan: "If you wanted me to shoot you in the front, you should have run toward me."

Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 10:04 AM (oknh1)

142 Maybe to see him limp.
Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:02 AM (WNOcj)

You will never see the Paolo limp.

Posted by: The Paolo at June 04, 2026 10:04 AM (1z8ji)

143 "It's one in a series of 6 paintings on the event..."

The paintings are in the Art Institute of Chicago. Each one is small, perhaps a square foot in area, and Goya dashed them off in response to the event which was widely talked about. Together, depict the incident serially, much like a comic strip: The bandit brandishes his gun; the friar arrives; the friar and the bandit struggle over the gun; the friar disarms the bandit; the friar shoots the bandit; and the friar ties the hands of the bleeding bandit.

Posted by: Nemo at June 04, 2026 10:04 AM (4RPgu)

144 Many burros have been named Pedro.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 04, 2026 10:04 AM (0sNs1)

145 “Instead of standing there and teaching a cop, when there’s an unarmed person coming at them with a knife or something, you shoot them in the leg instead of in the heart is a very different thing. There’s a lot of different things that could change,” Biden said in a meeting with community leaders at Bethel AME Church in Wilmington, Del.

Posted by: Way back in 2020 at June 04, 2026 10:05 AM (2Ez/1)

146 There it is. Put a gun in the painting and we will talk about it for ALL of the comments.

Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 10:06 AM (oknh1)

147
*sings*

Well, I shot a man in Reno
Shot him in the ass
When you hear that whistle blowin'
That's just him passin' gas

Posted by: naturalfake at June 04, 2026 10:06 AM (iJfKG)

148 This is a proudly masculine friar, unlike that Tuck guy.

Posted by: Bulg at June 04, 2026 10:06 AM (77rzZ)

149 Maybe this is a shoutout to the Chinese store owner that shot the thieving black yute in the back for robbing his store discussed in the J J Morning Report.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:07 AM (X0axn)

150 Is he the man with two ass holes now?
Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026

Now he has dual exhaust.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 04, 2026 10:07 AM (snZF9)

151 This painting hits me, considering current challenges in our country. The friar rescued a family from being held hostage. I feel like there are those attempting to hold freedom-lovers hostage. I want to see effective resistance against the enslavers. We don't even have to shoot -- just don't go along with their evil plans.

Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at June 04, 2026 10:07 AM (FMtrg)

152 We don't even have to shoot -- just don't go along with their evil plans.

Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at June 04, 2026 10:07 AM (FMtrg)

Don't be so hasty.

Posted by: Comrade Flounder, Disinformation Demon at June 04, 2026 10:08 AM (dK+Kv)

153 106 Pedro Piñero was hanged and dismembered on August 18, 1806, with pieces of his body displayed along the roads to deter other outlaws.

Now, normally a man dies after all that, but Pedro was displayed in a plce
Posted by: callsign claymore at June 04, 2026 09:50 AM (/6r4m)
--
A man's got to know his limitations.

Posted by: Squintin Clint at June 04, 2026 10:09 AM (cWLG3)

154 Friar Karen enforcing the local HOA ordinances.

Posted by: Roy at June 04, 2026 10:09 AM (qwype)

155 “Instead of standing there and teaching a cop, when there’s an unarmed person coming at them with a knife or something, you shoot them in the leg instead of in the heart is a very different thing. There’s a lot of different things that could change,” Biden said in a meeting with community leaders at Bethel AME Church in Wilmington, Del.
Posted by: Way back in 2020 at June 04, 2026 10:05 AM (2Ez/1)

We all know Biden is a damned idiot, but "an unarmed person coming at them with a knife" is not unarmed. He is armed with a knife, and potentially deadly if within 20 feet.

Posted by: The Paolo at June 04, 2026 10:09 AM (1z8ji)

156 I want to see effective resistance against the enslavers. We don't even have to shoot -- just don't go along with their evil plans.

Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at June 04, 2026 10:07 AM (FMtrg)

You might have no interest in their evil plans, but their evil plans have an interest in you.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 04, 2026 10:09 AM (snZF9)

157 146 There it is. Put a gun in the painting and we will talk about it for ALL of the comments.
Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 10:06 AM (oknh1

I wonder how that compares to boobs in a painting.

Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at June 04, 2026 10:09 AM (FMtrg)

158 WASHINGTON (AP) — Vice President Joe Biden said Tuesday that Americans don’t need semi-automatic weapons to protect their homes because a couple of blasts from a shotgun will scare off intruders.

“Buy a shotgun, buy a shotgun,” the vice president encouraged those worried about defending themselves. He was speaking in an online video as part of a Facebook town hall hosted by Parents Magazine on the administration’s strategy for reducing gun violence, which he has led at the direction of President Barack Obama.

Biden said he keeps two shotguns and shells locked up at home and he’s told his wife, Jill, to use them if she needs protection. He presumably was speaking about before he became vice president, a position that gives the couple full-time Secret Service protection.

“I said, ‘Jill, if there’s ever a problem, just walk out on the balcony ... take that double-barrel shotgun and fire two blasts outside the house,’” Biden said. “You don’t need an AR-15. It’s harder to aim, it’s harder to use and in fact, you don’t need 30 rounds to protect yourself.”

Posted by: Way back in 2013 at June 04, 2026 10:10 AM (2Ez/1)

159 The store owner shot him in back because he believed he was pointing gun at his son. I think that was the key in the not guilty verdict. Now how does he get his three years back?

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:10 AM (WNOcj)

160 Posted by: Comrade Flounder, Disinformation Demon at June 04, 2026 10:08 AM (dK+Kv)

Mother f'er I was just queuing up one of those. I already forgot my wording - it might have literally been that

Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 10:10 AM (oknh1)

161
"When you have to shoot, shoot. Don't talk."
-- Tuco

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 04, 2026 10:10 AM (0sNs1)

162 Off, Paolo sock.

Looks like someone has run afoul of the autoban?

Posted by: The Paolo at June 04, 2026 10:10 AM (1z8ji)

163

Now he has dual exhaust.
Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 04, 2026 10:07 AM (snZF9)

The Spanish 442

4 eyes (glasses)
4 skin
2 asshole

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:11 AM (X0axn)

164 Heh. The Paolo talking about brandishing something at a distance of 20 feet.

Posted by: Bulg at June 04, 2026 10:12 AM (77rzZ)

165 Damned sticky sock!

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at June 04, 2026 10:12 AM (1z8ji)

166 The jig is up
That's racist

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at June 04, 2026 10:12 AM (Kt19C)

167 Too soon!!!!!

Posted by: Zombie Cyrus Carmack-Belton at June 04, 2026 10:12 AM (JCZqz)

168 'Go with God, my son.'

Posted by: Aetius451AD at June 04, 2026 10:12 AM (bss/y)

169 said, ‘Jill, if there’s ever a problem, just walk out on the balcony ... take that double-barrel shotgun and fire two blasts outside the house,’” Biden said. “You don’t need an AR-15. It’s harder to aim, it’s harder to use and in fact, you don’t need 30 rounds to protect yourself.”
Posted by: Way back in 2013 at June 04, 2026 10:10 AM (2Ez/1

Seems if this was true all the mass shooters would use shotguns. ( the Aurora shooter did when his his AR magazine malfunctioned)

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:12 AM (WNOcj)

170 Mother f'er I was just queuing up one of those. I already forgot my wording - it might have literally been that

Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 10:10 AM (oknh1)

People like to have options, is all.

Posted by: Comrade Flounder, Disinformation Demon at June 04, 2026 10:12 AM (dK+Kv)

171 Friar Pedro Shoots El Maragato as His Horse Runs Off
Francisco José de Goya y Lucientes

I didn't read all above to see if anyone quoted the ending of the piece so it's here:

This narrative series stands in marked contrast to the portraits of royalty and nobility that make up much of Goya’s painted works. His other small-format paintings similarly treat traditional pastimes, superstitions, and scenes from daily life with a popular realism that is often darkly comic in tone. Goya may have created the El Maragato series for his own amusement rather than as a commission, since they were still listed among his possessions in an 1812 inventory.

And as above, (44. It's one in a series of 6 paintings on the event... Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia), it is and all six in the series can be viewed on Art Institute Chicago artworks website in the 'Friar Pedro Shoots El Maragato as His Horse Runs Off' link.

Don't know if I'd hang all in the series or even this one lone painting, but it's an interesting & fun lesson in art.
thanks

Posted by: L - No nic, another fine day at June 04, 2026 10:13 AM (NFX2v)

172 There it is. Put a gun in the painting and we will talk about it for ALL of the comments.
Posted by: ... at June 04, 2026 10:06 AM (oknh1

I wonder how that compares to boobs in a painting.
Posted by: Emmie -- be strong and courageous! at June 04, 2026 10:09 AM

There's no reason the beauty, the power, the majesty of And can't be invoked here. Along with some happy little bushes, of course.

Posted by: zombie Bob Ross at June 04, 2026 10:13 AM (0sNs1)

173 There's no reason the beauty, the power, the majesty of And can't be invoked here. Along with some happy little bushes, of course.

Posted by: zombie Bob Ross at June 04, 2026 10:13 AM (0sNs1)

Or hardwood, if that strikes your fancy.

Posted by: Comrade Flounder, Disinformation Demon at June 04, 2026 10:14 AM (dK+Kv)

174 The fact that a monk shot him reminded me of the story of St Gabriel Possenti, who scared off a band of Italian redshirts from his village with his marksmanship , though he supposedly only shot a lizard.

Posted by: frankie at June 04, 2026 10:14 AM (a16Yj)

175 You will never see the Paolo limp.
Posted by: The Paolo at June 04, 2026 10:04 AM (1z8ji)

You're welcome.

Posted by: Big Pharma at June 04, 2026 10:15 AM (n9eFH)

176 174 The fact that a monk shot him reminded me of the story of St Gabriel Possenti, who scared off a band of Italian redshirts from his village with his marksmanship , though he supposedly only shot a lizard.
Posted by: frankie at June 04, 2026 10:14 AM (a16Yj)
- - - - - - - - - - -
Alternative ending to Rango that made it into a short, rather than a full-length animated movie.

Posted by: Another Anon at June 04, 2026 10:17 AM (4h45B)

177 "A dog limps into a bar and growls, "I'm lookin' for the man what shot my ass!"

This first draft of the joke did not test well in pre-release focus groups and subsequently underwent several revisions before becoming a classic.

Posted by: muldoon at June 04, 2026 10:19 AM (qgHp7)

178 Talking about Eastwood being the Monk reminded me of Two Mules for Sister Sarah. Haven't decided whether I like that one or not.

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:19 AM (WNOcj)

179
Or hardwood, if that strikes your fancy.
Posted by: Comrade Flounder, Disinformation Demon at June 04, 2026 10:14 AM (dK+Kv)

Nothing beats a good piece of hickory.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:19 AM (X0axn)

180 dog limps into a bar and growls, "I'm lookin' for the man what shot my ass!"

And the bartender says 'what's a dog doing riding a donkey?'

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:20 AM (WNOcj)

181 A Buddhist monk, a Catholic priest, and a rabbit walk into a bar...
The rabbit says "I think I'm a typo"

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at June 04, 2026 10:23 AM (2Ez/1)

182 Nothing beats like a good piece of hickory.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:19 AM (X0axn)

Fixed.

Posted by: Thin Blue LIne at June 04, 2026 10:23 AM (dK+Kv)

183 He shot him in the dick!

Posted by: torabora at June 04, 2026 10:24 AM (ddl1m)

184 One of my uncles always wanted to be a monk.
But he never got the chants.

Posted by: Oh, no... at June 04, 2026 10:24 AM (2Ez/1)

185 178 I thought that Shirley McClain in that movie was more attractive as the nun than as the hooker. She was demure and cute in that habit.

Posted by: Bulg at June 04, 2026 10:24 AM (77rzZ)

186 "Stand still while the flint gets struck and the spark makes its way into the chamber!"

I like this. A little bit of silliness. The painting doesn't take itself so seriously.

Posted by: t-bird at June 04, 2026 10:24 AM (egaJw)

187 One of you go back to town and get a shitload of dimes.

Posted by: Taggart at June 04, 2026 10:25 AM (7oSfg)

188 185 As opposed to let it all hang out as the hooker.

Posted by: Bulg at June 04, 2026 10:26 AM (77rzZ)

189 "Forgive me Padre for I have sinned. It has been 3 years since my last ass-shooting..."

Posted by: muldoon at June 04, 2026 10:26 AM (qgHp7)

190 "That's so, even a tramp like me, no matter what happens, I know there's a brother who won't refuse me a bowl of soup"

Maybe not.

Posted by: Halfhand at June 04, 2026 10:27 AM (JsZm/)

191 Title checks out, assuming the guy on the right is El Maragato.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at June 04, 2026 10:27 AM (6/7Fs)

192 People are using the term rifle for the firearm. For the style and period and a likely buck and ball charge, it should be a smoothbore, not rifled.

Thus endeth the unnecessary and unasked for lesson.

Posted by: JTB at June 04, 2026 10:27 AM (yTvNw)

193 Jocularity!

Posted by: Father John Patrick Francis McManus McTeigle McCloud Mulcahey at June 04, 2026 10:27 AM (n9eFH)

194 "...Shirley McClain in that movie was more attractive as the nun than as the hooker. She was demure and cute in that habit."
----
Mother superior, we discovered a case of chlamydia in the convent.

Oh, thank goodness! I've gotten so sick of the Chardonnay.

Posted by: Obligatory Nunnery Joke at June 04, 2026 10:28 AM (2Ez/1)

195 Talking about Eastwood being the Monk reminded me of Two Mules for Sister Sarah. Haven't decided whether I like that one or not.
Posted by: polynikes

You just need the right lens to see it through. Shirley MacLaine was described by the director as "It's hard to feel any great warmth to her. She's too unfeminine and has too much balls. She's very, very hard." Sounds like the perfect candidate for a "modern audience" remake. Especially during Pride month! Is Elliot Page available!?!?!

Posted by: Admiral Ackbar at June 04, 2026 10:28 AM (JCZqz)

196 Wakes up
Scratches
Looks around
Dang. What's the point of the painting if the title tells the whole story?
Goes looking for coffee.

Posted by: Diogenes at June 04, 2026 10:29 AM (2WIwB)

197 Is Elliot Page available!?!?!
Posted by: Admiral Ackbar at June 04, 2026 10:28 AM (JCZqz)

Last time I saw that thing, it looked like it was going to blow away in a breeze. It can't be much longer for this world.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:30 AM (X0axn)

198 Mark Wahlberg's new movie By Any Means is The Green Book on steroids. It's definitely a revenge fantasy movie like Tarantino makes. Great time to dredge up shit again for the agitators. /s

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:31 AM (WNOcj)

199 Talking about Eastwood being the Monk reminded me of Two Mules for Sister Sarah. Haven't decided whether I like that one or not.
Posted by: polynikes
========
I've always been a big fan of Lilies of the Field with Sidney Poitier.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at June 04, 2026 10:31 AM (2Ez/1)

200 Francisco José de Goya y Lucientes con Leche y Santa Maria

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at June 04, 2026 10:32 AM (6/7Fs)

201 Morning.

Man, what the fuck is going on here? The Friar can't aim for shit.

Posted by: Robert at June 04, 2026 10:34 AM (dpXJq)

202 >>>A Buddhist monk, a Catholic priest, and a rabbit walk into a bar...
The rabbit says "I think I'm a typo"
Posted by: Quarter Twenty at June 04, 2026 10:23 AM (2Ez/1)
****
Should have used a "blood bank" instead of a bar.

Posted by: Rufus T. Firefly at June 04, 2026 10:34 AM (0qeuY)

203
CBD,

Since the Art Thread is in Spain...

let's have a cool bullfighting painting tomorrow.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 04, 2026 10:36 AM (iJfKG)

204 Wow... Big surprise.. Both Pratt and Hilton have dropped hugely in the last ballot drop.... They look like they are headed for third place....

Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:37 AM (gmEzm)

205
Since the Art Thread is in Spain...

let's have a cool bullfighting painting tomorrow.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 04, 2026 10:36 AM (iJfKG)

I thought he was in Boston?

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:38 AM (X0axn)

206 Bullfighting? Yes, please!
— David French

Posted by: Bulg at June 04, 2026 10:38 AM (77rzZ)

207 Wow... Big surprise.. Both Pratt and Hilton have dropped hugely in the last ballot drop.... They look like they are headed for third place....
Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:37 AM (gmEzm)

No fraud there. Nope. None. No way.

Cali is f*cked.......

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:38 AM (X0axn)

208 OWWWWW YOU MUTHA FUCKA!!!!
You shot me in the ASS!!!
*lights up a Kool*

Posted by: Alonso "El Maragato" Harris at June 04, 2026 10:39 AM (TbWk/)

209 Francisco José de Goya y Lucientes con Leche y Santa Maria"

gesundheit

Posted by: man at June 04, 2026 10:39 AM (XuXeR)

210
"Hungry"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ei7PxNH1AZI

This might be a fun watch,

Word is though, that they don't concentrate on bloody, rampaging hippo attacks enough.

For all they're cute, puffy, fatty looks hippos are supposed to be incredibly vicious, territorial assholes.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 04, 2026 10:39 AM (iJfKG)

211 201 Morning.

Man, what the fuck is going on here? The Friar can't aim for shit.
Posted by: Robert at June 04, 2026 10:34 AM (dpXJq)

Shoot him in the taint. Can't tourniquet that.

Posted by: Our Country is Screwed at June 04, 2026 10:39 AM (N39Ws)

212 The Hot Air Primary Results page still has it

Karen Bass *
NPA 183,701 35%
Spencer Pratt
NPA 157,116 29.9%
Nithya Raman
NPA 119,809 22.8%

Updated just now, but saying 0% reporting, so........

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:41 AM (X0axn)

213 210 I’ve read that hippos kill more people than crocodiles.

Posted by: Bulg at June 04, 2026 10:41 AM (77rzZ)

214 For all they're cute, puffy, fatty looks hippos are supposed to be incredibly vicious, territorial assholes.
Posted by: naturalfake at June 04, 2026 10:39 AM (iJfKG)

For short distances, they can outrun and outswim a man, so the only way to beat a hippo in the Triathalon is on the bike...

Posted by: Just the punchine at June 04, 2026 10:41 AM (n9eFH)

215 Both Pratt and Hilton have dropped hugely in the last ballot drop.... They look like they are headed for third place...."

"hey, let's not get too carried away. Gotta stretch this out"

/votecounters

Posted by: man at June 04, 2026 10:42 AM (XuXeR)

216 If Pratt falls to third , if that isn't a wake up call for those that voted for him to move out of CA nothing will.

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:42 AM (WNOcj)

217 213 210 I’ve read that hippos kill more people than crocodiles.

--------

That's because crocodiles stay out of the way of hippos.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at June 04, 2026 10:42 AM (6/7Fs)

218 213 210 I’ve read that hippos kill more people than crocodiles.
Posted by: Bulg at June 04, 2026 10:41 AM (77rzZ)

Pretty sure they are the #1 killer of humans among large land animals in Africa.

Posted by: Stomp you flat. Or bite you to death. at June 04, 2026 10:43 AM (TbWk/)

219 216 If Pratt falls to third , if that isn't a wake up call for those that voted for him to move out of CA nothing will.
Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:42 AM (WNOc

Trump has already called for an investigation... Fact chance of that

Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:43 AM (gmEzm)

220 215 Both Pratt and Hilton have dropped hugely in the last ballot drop.... They look like they are headed for third place...."

"hey, let's not get too carried away. Gotta stretch this out"

/votecounters

Posted by: man at June 04, 2026 10:42 AM (XuXeR)

да

Posted by: Josef Stalin's Ghost at June 04, 2026 10:44 AM (l3cgK)

221 Updated just now, but saying 0% reporting, so........
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:41 AM (X0axn)

I'm not going to do the math because don't have all the candidates numbers but I bet that 29.9 percent is really 30% but they didn't want to report that .

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:44 AM (WNOcj)

222 Wow... Big surprise.. Both Pratt and Hilton have dropped hugely in the last ballot drop.... They look like they are headed for third place....
Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:37 AM (gmEzm)

No fraud there. Nope. None. No way.

Cali is f*cked.......
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:38 AM (X0axn)

The DOJ needs to sue California to end their so-called "jungle primary" system, at least for Federal offices. The Constitution grants Congress the authority to set the date for Federal elections. This "jungle primary" might be a primary in name but in practice it's the actual election while the November election is turned into a run-off.

Now this wouldn't affect state and municipal elections but this would be a freakin' start.

Posted by: Robert at June 04, 2026 10:45 AM (dpXJq)

223 Trump has already called for an investigation... Fact chance of that
Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:43 AM (gmEzm)

Declare California to be in a state of insurrection. Send Federal troops in, shoot all the Democrats.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at June 04, 2026 10:45 AM (1z8ji)

224 If Pratt falls to third , if that isn't a wake up call for those that voted for him to move out of CA nothing will.

If Pratt falls to third, IF, it's a wake up call for Thune. Yeah, yeah, state elections, municipal elections...doesn't matter. If they'll cheat there, they'll cheat anywhere. It's up to you, John Thune, John THUNE!

Posted by: Archimedes at June 04, 2026 10:46 AM (Riz8t)

225 223 Trump has already called for an investigation... Fact chance of that
Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:43 AM (gmEzm)

Declare California to be in a state of insurrection. Send Federal troops in, shoot all the Democrats.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at June 04, 2026 10:45 AM (1z8ji)

You know, maybe as recently as 10-15 years ago I would have dismissed that as crazy and reactionary. Now I'm thinking "yeah, that's a pretty reasonable response."

Posted by: The time for restrain has passed at June 04, 2026 10:47 AM (TbWk/)

226 Whenever I see the name John Thune, I think somebody is lisping...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 10:47 AM (l3cgK)

227 I have to LOL. Bass is a literal Karen...

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 10:48 AM (l3cgK)

228 I thought it was odd that Bass gave a victory speech early on in the evening when Pratt was only a few points behind.... She knows the fix is in...

Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:48 AM (gmEzm)

229 He shoots him in the ass so he can't run off. Now the perp has to listen to the sermon. The long version.

Posted by: Bonecrusher at June 04, 2026 10:49 AM (JNTt1)

230 I thought it was odd that Bass gave a victory speech early on in the evening when Pratt was only a few points behind.... She knows the fix is in...
Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:48 AM (gmEzm)

Democrats know they'll never be stopped.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:49 AM (X0axn)

231 Badass.

Posted by: Axeman at June 04, 2026 10:50 AM (Fi81e)

232 And Bass's claims of success are straight out of 1984. Don't believe your lying eyes .

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:50 AM (WNOcj)

233 228 I thought it was odd that Bass gave a victory speech early on in the evening when Pratt was only a few points behind.... She knows the fix is in...

Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:48 AM (gmEzm)

The FIXX is in!
https://youtu.be/pIe-Cj071l0

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 10:50 AM (l3cgK)

234 She knows the fix is in..."

A blind fool knows this result...

Posted by: man at June 04, 2026 10:50 AM (XuXeR)

235 I said DANCE tenderfoot!

Posted by: Archer at June 04, 2026 10:50 AM (wvc0i)

236 Democrats know they'll never be punched in the face. Hard.

FIFY

Posted by: man at June 04, 2026 10:51 AM (XuXeR)

237 Hilton was on Laura last night and he was cautiously optimistic but you'd could tell he knew it wasn't gonna be good...

Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:52 AM (gmEzm)

238 From @shipwreckedcrew:

...the main “dumps” averaged 38 Bass, 32 Ramen, and 19 Pratt...

If that margin holds with 400,000 ballots left, she (Ramen) will catch him (Pratt).

Posted by: IrishEi ?! at June 04, 2026 10:54 AM (3ImbR)

239
Shot in the ass
And you're to blame.
You give monks
A bad name.

Posted by: Axeman at June 04, 2026 10:54 AM (Fi81e)

240 238 From @shipwreckedcrew:

...the main “dumps” averaged 38 Bass, 32 Ramen, and 19 Pratt...

If that margin holds with 400,000 ballots left, she (Ramen) will catch him (Pratt).
Posted by: IrishEi ?! at June 04, 2026 10:54 AM (3Im

Same with Hilton... Steyer moved up

Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:54 AM (gmEzm)

241 A blind fool knows this result...
Posted by: man at June 04, 2026 10:50 AM (XuXeR)
---
I new the result 3 weeks ago.

Posted by: Axeman at June 04, 2026 10:55 AM (Fi81e)

242 The FIXX is in!
https://youtu.be/pIe-Cj071l0

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 10:50 AM (l3cgK)

Well played, sir. Well played.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 10:55 AM (X0axn)

243 241 A blind fool knows this result...
Posted by: man at June 04, 2026 10:50 AM (XuXeR)
---
I new the result 3 weeks ago.
Posted by: Axeman at June 04, 2026 10:55 AM (Fi81e)

I guess they had to make it look like it was competitive at first and now the "real" numbers are being dropped....

Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:56 AM (gmEzm)

244 The FIXX is in!
https://youtu.be/pIe-Cj071l0

Posted by: jim (in Kalifornia) at June 04, 2026 10:50 AM (l3cgK)
---
You're welcome.

Posted by: Zero at June 04, 2026 10:56 AM (Fi81e)

245 Wow... Big surprise.. Both Pratt and Hilton have dropped hugely in the last ballot drop.... They look like they are headed for third place....
Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:37 AM (gmEzm)

Who could have seen this coming?

Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at June 04, 2026 10:56 AM (g8Ew8)

246 I do feel bad for those that want to leave CA but for whatever reason can't because of obligations and responsibilities that trap them there.

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:57 AM (WNOcj)

247 Not in love with this guy's fundamentals.
Posted by: Weasel at June 04, 2026 10:56 AM (KVm/I)

He shot the perp in the fundament. Results matter.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at June 04, 2026 10:57 AM (1z8ji)

248 At The Times: "I love pubs, says William as he pulls pud in Peckham"

Oh wait. He was pulling 'pints.' My bad.

Posted by: gp at June 04, 2026 10:57 AM (Wq24h)

249 246 I do feel bad for those that want to leave CA but for whatever reason can't because of obligations and responsibilities that trap them there.
Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:57 AM (WNOcj)

For Us it's age and Family.. If we were younger we would be out of here....

Posted by: It's me donna at June 04, 2026 10:57 AM (gmEzm)

250 178 Talking about Eastwood being the Monk reminded me of Two Mules for Sister Sarah. Haven't decided whether I like that one or not.

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 10:19 AM (WNOcj)

Heh, same thing happened to me.

Posted by: farquad at June 04, 2026 10:58 AM (CFMhl)

251 Painting: I suggest that the friar wear safety glasses when firing that infernal boomstick.

Posted by: gp at June 04, 2026 10:58 AM (Wq24h)

252 Not in love with this guy's fundamentals.
Posted by: Weasel at June 04, 2026 10:56 AM (KVm/I)

He shot the perp in the fundament. Results matter.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at June 04, 2026 10:57 AM (1z8ji)
---
The monk's a fundamentalist.

Posted by: Axeman at June 04, 2026 10:59 AM (Fi81e)

253 Painting: I suggest that the friar wear safety glasses when firing that infernal boomstick.
Posted by: gp at June 04, 2026 10:58 AM (Wq24h)
---
We're shutting it down.

Posted by: OSHA at June 04, 2026 11:00 AM (Fi81e)

254 BLAM BLAM BLMA!

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 04, 2026 11:00 AM (W2Pud)

255 A Buddhist monk, a Catholic priest, and a rabbit walk into a bar...
The rabbit says "I think I'm a typo"
Posted by: Quarter Twenty at June 04, 2026 10:23 AM (2Ez/1)
==========

The bartender replies "Are you positive?"

Posted by: mrp at June 04, 2026 11:00 AM (rj6Yv)

256 .
NOODUS Rantus

Posted by: Hillary's seventh replacement liver at June 04, 2026 11:01 AM (O7YUW)

257 NOODlum.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 04, 2026 11:01 AM (X0axn)

258 Posted by: farquad at June 04, 2026 10:58 AM (CFMhl)

I must be a kid at heart because I didn't learn until recently that was a pun for the adults watching Shrek.

Posted by: polynikes at June 04, 2026 11:01 AM (WNOcj)

259 WTF?!? Is he trying to kneecap the lad? Why? Did he steal his brew? Weird subject badly painted. Would not hang.

Posted by: The Man from Athens at June 04, 2026 11:02 AM (icmmM)

260 Democrats know they'll never be stopped.
Posted by: Sponge

They'll definitely catch the Roadrunner this time.

Posted by: t-bird at June 04, 2026 11:02 AM (egaJw)

261 As far as the insurrection in CA goes, the Senate majority leader will tackle it Thoon enough.

Posted by: Bonecrusher at June 04, 2026 11:14 AM (JNTt1)

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