Mid-Morning Art Thread

Cupid Chastised
Bartolomeo Manfredi

Good old Bart is considered one of the many Caravaggisti, and it is obvious that he embraced Caravaggio's style, and quite well!

From the Getty Museum website:

Bartolomeo Manfredi was known throughout Italy and beyond as Caravaggio's closest follower. More than simply copying Caravaggio's style, Manfredi reinterpreted his subjects and rendered new ones, while drawing upon and propagating Caravaggesque naturalism and dramatic use of chiaroscuro.

Posted by: CBD at 09:30 AM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 Sponge!

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 09:34 AM (xbf8A)

2 FIRST!!!!!

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:35 AM (Zz0t1)

3 Whoopin dat azz!

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 09:35 AM (xbf8A)

4 Who could bring himself to chastise that little cherub???

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:36 AM (wzUl9)

5 Itty bitty titty

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:36 AM (Zz0t1)

6 dramatic use of chiaroscuro.

-
I prefer chiaroscuro to marinara on my spaghetti.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Fat, Dumb, and Happy at June 03, 2026 09:36 AM (ndZc7)

7 Cheeky.

Posted by: Debby Doberman Schultz at June 03, 2026 09:36 AM (0nHVk)

8 Somebody's getting a spanking.

Posted by: Tuna at June 03, 2026 09:36 AM (lJ0H4)

9 The Faustian brown is great!

Posted by: Oglebay at June 03, 2026 09:36 AM (w8dnx)

10 Cupid had it coming.

Posted by: Winston AKA Pops at June 03, 2026 09:36 AM (faK3k)

11 Chastised? Seems a whoopin' goin' on.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:36 AM (Zz0t1)

12 Beat on the brat

Posted by: Delurker at June 03, 2026 09:36 AM (gtcuf)

13 He's gonna get a spankin'!

Posted by: Pawl at June 03, 2026 09:37 AM (VPPBF)

14 Mars was angry that day, my friends.

Posted by: George Costanza at June 03, 2026 09:37 AM (2Ez/1)

15 That seems as if there's a little more than just chastising going on there.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at June 03, 2026 09:37 AM (bFu5X)

16 Oh dear, can appreciate the skill, but not my cup of tea?

Posted by: Lizzy at June 03, 2026 09:37 AM (X8xt3)

17 Posted by: Paul at June 03, 2026 09:36 AM (59BGO)

You DICK!!!!

Posted by: Jeff Spicoli at June 03, 2026 09:37 AM (Zz0t1)

18 chiaroscuro

That's good ham.

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at June 03, 2026 09:37 AM (Kt19C)

19 He effed around and he found out.

Posted by: Zombie Robbo the Llama Butcher, phoning it in at June 03, 2026 09:37 AM (jYxaI)

20 Wow. Powerful stuff. Unusual for the time in presentation and subject, I would bet.

Posted by: Huck Follywood at June 03, 2026 09:37 AM (3rR55)

21 Free the nipple!

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at June 03, 2026 09:37 AM (D1E+2)

22 From artic.edu:

"Cupid Chastised depicts a moment of high drama: Mars, the god of war, violently whips the young boy, Cupid, as punishment for embroiling the god in an affair with the boy’s mother, Venus, the goddess of love. Venus tries in vain to stop the beating. Surrounded by darkness, the three ﬁgures are boldly illuminated from the left, intensifying the composition’s dynamism and impact. The physicality of the ﬁgures conveys the violent discord of the scene: the crouching, wide-eyed Venus; the furious, muscular Mars; and Cupid, whose naked ﬂesh and recumbent position render him particularly vulnerable. On one level a tale of interpersonal conﬂict, the story also symbolizes the eternal conﬂict between love and war."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:37 AM (wzUl9)

23 Whether you're more a tits guy, or an ass man, this piece has you covered.

When I first saw the image, I thought of Caravaggio, but the red especially wasn't quite right....not deep enough shadows, I think, and the color isn't quite deep/rich enough. "Caravaggio with better ambient lighting."

Posted by: Admiral Ackbar at June 03, 2026 09:38 AM (JCZqz)

24 She's trying to distract him with tits. It's not working.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:38 AM (Zz0t1)

25 She needs to fire her seamstress.

Posted by: redridinghood at June 03, 2026 09:38 AM (NpAcC)

26 Paul says "gay" and he would certainly know...

Posted by: Huck Follywood at June 03, 2026 09:38 AM (3rR55)

27 Open can of WhoopAss just out of frame.

Posted by: Quarter Twenty at June 03, 2026 09:39 AM (2Ez/1)

28 Yo Venus - you're boob hangin' out your toga.

I would've thought Venus would be a bit more busty.

Posted by: Delurker at June 03, 2026 09:39 AM (gtcuf)

29 I can give Cupid a pass, as he's supposed to appear young, so some baby fat is okay. Venus looks like she could afford to hit the gym.

Mars looks like he's having some 'roid rage.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:39 AM (wzUl9)

30 chiaroscuro

That's good ham.
Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at June 03, 2026 09:37 AM (Kt19C)

I thought that was that greasy ass Mexican sausage stuff.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:39 AM (Zz0t1)

31 Chastised? Seems a whoopin' goin' on.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer

Only thing missing is the hot wheel track.

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 09:39 AM (xbf8A)

32 Somebody's getting a spanking.
Posted by: Tuna
__________

Three blocks away, Cupid was getting his.

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at June 03, 2026 09:39 AM (XvL8K)

33 Whether you're more a tits guy, or an ass man, this piece has you covered.

The latter? Only if you work at the Lincoln Project.

Posted by: gKWVE at June 03, 2026 09:40 AM (gKWVE)

34 I take it lead poisoning or copious amounts of intoxicating liquids were at play in the conception and production of the painting.

It's masterful nonetheless.

Posted by: Thomas Bender at June 03, 2026 09:40 AM (XV/Pl)

35 This reminds me of a line from the movie Sweet Smell of Success:

"Come here, Sidney, I want to chastise you."

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing (aka Eloquent Depression) at June 03, 2026 09:40 AM (qRla/)

36
Only thing missing is the hot wheel track.

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 09:39 AM (xbf8A)

Mom used a well worn in, thick leather belt.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:41 AM (Zz0t1)

37 Art in the style of Henry Nowak's demise

Posted by: SMOD at June 03, 2026 09:41 AM (RHGPo)

38 Eat My Shorts.
LIB'd out Logic: Thank you sir may I have another.

https://tinyurl.com/forWARd-LIBdOutLogic
https://tinyurl.com/forWARd-PressWithBothHands
https://tinyurl.com/forWARd-SaveDaWorldTakeTheGun

Posted by: MANFRED the Heat Seeking OBOE at June 03, 2026 09:41 AM (UwGbz)

39 We're outta here!

Posted by: The white doves at June 03, 2026 09:41 AM (2Ez/1)

40 Every once in a while, I'd have to take a beating. But by then, I didn't care. The way I saw it, everybody takes a beating sometime.

Posted by: Henry Hill at June 03, 2026 09:41 AM (NgqoH)

41 No, Mars! Work the body! Or the face! Leave his ass alone!

Posted by: Lindsey Graham at June 03, 2026 09:41 AM (BI5O2)

42 That is exactly how we interview interns here at Lincoln Project!

Posted by: Rick Wilson, Proud Seccessionist at June 03, 2026 09:42 AM (3rR55)

43 Just shit all over the 100 comment rule......

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:42 AM (Zz0t1)

44 It might be my imagination but Mars seems to have a hint of mustache. Maybe Mercury challenged him to grow one, and it's not coming in very well.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:42 AM (wzUl9)

45 Now whip it into shape
Shape it up, get straight
Go forward, move ahead
Try to detect it, it's not too late
To whip it, whip it good.

Posted by: Devo at June 03, 2026 09:42 AM (sUTO1)

46 The medieval-style helmet and Mars' breastplate look a bit anachronistic....

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 03, 2026 09:42 AM (gnNyN)

47 pubhist.com

"Cupid Chastised" is a painting by Bartolomeo Manfredi, created in 1613, depicting the Roman god of war, Mars, punishing Cupid, the god of love, for his illicit affair with Venus, the goddess of beauty. The artwork is known for its dramatic use of light and shadow, characteristic of the Baroque period, and is part of the collection at the Art Institute of Chicago."

Posted by: redridinghood at June 03, 2026 09:43 AM (NpAcC)

48 This is like a still photograph from an action scene. Energy galore.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:43 AM (wzUl9)

49 The lesser-known cat-o-two-tails, developed for chastising children and cherubs.

Posted by: Delurker at June 03, 2026 09:44 AM (gtcuf)

50 Whether you're more a tits guy, or an ass man, this piece has you covered.

The latter? Only if you work at the Lincoln Project.
Posted by: gKWVE at June 03, 2026

***
If Mars were "chastising" one of those hot little wood nymphs . . .

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:44 AM (wzUl9)

51 Cupid has a big butt

Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 09:44 AM (FtULh)

52 I thought that Mars was supposed to be Cupid’s father. So how could Cupid have “embroiled” him in the affair with his mother?

Posted by: Bulg at June 03, 2026 09:44 AM (77rzZ)

53 Of all the things I was whipped with as a yute, a rope was not one.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:45 AM (Zz0t1)

54
Rope is weak. Get a knout, Greek homos.

Posted by: Cossacks at June 03, 2026 09:46 AM (BI5O2)

55 The medieval-style helmet and Mars' breastplate look a bit anachronistic....
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 03, 2026

***
It really *was* the fashion at the time -- to depict the past, or mythic times, in the clothing of the painter's present.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:46 AM (wzUl9)

56 That does it.

I'm calling CPS.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 03, 2026 09:46 AM (RIvkX)

57 >53 Of all the things I was whipped with as a yute, a rope was not one.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:45 AM (Zz0t1)

Wooden spoon - my Babci's favorite weapon of choice to keep Mini Meta in line.

Posted by: Heavy Meta at June 03, 2026 09:46 AM (NgqoH)

58 Cupid has a big butt
Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 09:44 AM (FtULh)

Suggested edit - Cupid got a big ol' butt.

Then everyone says "Oh yeah!"

Posted by: Doof at June 03, 2026 09:46 AM (90oZi)

59 What is Venus clutching in her right hand, next to her big Ana Navarro peasant foot?

Posted by: Delurker at June 03, 2026 09:46 AM (gtcuf)

60
Wooden spoon - my Babci's favorite weapon of choice to keep Mini Meta in line.
Posted by: Heavy Meta at June 03, 2026 09:46 AM (NgqoH)

Usually a belt. Did crack me on the head with a 2x4 once.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:47 AM (Zz0t1)

61 I thought that Mars was supposed to be Cupid’s father. So how could Cupid have “embroiled” him in the affair with his mother?
Posted by: Bulg at June 03, 2026 09:44 AM (77rzZ)
----
Were Mars and Venus married?

Maybe they had a falling out and Cupid tried to get his parents back together and Mars wasn't having any of that because he wanted to play the field.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 03, 2026 09:48 AM (gnNyN)

62 What is Venus clutching in her right hand, next to her big Ana Navarro peasant foot?
Posted by: Delurker at June 03, 2026 09:46 AM (gtcuf)

Cupid's arrows.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:48 AM (Zz0t1)

63 Yes. Yes, you must give us all a good spanking!

Posted by: Monty Python at June 03, 2026 09:48 AM (2Ez/1)

64 Mars and Venus were in conjugation? Astronomic!

"…On one level a tale of interpersonal conﬂict, the story also symbolizes the eternal conﬂict between love and war."
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius

What? Nothing about the birdies leaving the scene?

Posted by: mindful webworker - conjugate, conjugate, inflect to the muuusic at June 03, 2026 09:48 AM (kU8xu)

65 People in NYC pay good money for that

Posted by: Inspector Lestrade at June 03, 2026 09:48 AM (baPXJ)

66 Weird left forearm on the itty-bitty-titty woman. All puffy.

Posted by: one hour sober at June 03, 2026 09:48 AM (J4Dwc)

67 What is Venus clutching in her right hand, next to her big Ana Navarro peasant foot?
Posted by: Delurker at June 03, 2026

***
Some of Cupid's fallen arrows. A bunch have spilled out of his quiver.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:48 AM (wzUl9)

68 Oh, she's clutching some of Cupid's arrows, duh. I had to embiggen it.

Posted by: Delurker at June 03, 2026 09:48 AM (gtcuf)

69 Alternate Title:

Trump Kicking Iran's Ass While Democrats Plead for Mercy

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 03, 2026 09:48 AM (RIvkX)

70 It really *was* the fashion at the time -- to depict the past, or mythic times, in the clothing of the painter's present.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:46 AM (wzUl9)\
----
Then Mars needs an onion tied to his belt...

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 03, 2026 09:49 AM (gnNyN)

71 You know that oral sex you were gonna have, honey?... ever?

Posted by: Aphrodite at June 03, 2026 09:49 AM (gKWVE)

72 This picture made me quiver.

Posted by: Delurker at June 03, 2026 09:49 AM (gtcuf)

73 Mama's boy.

Posted by: No Name Today at June 03, 2026 09:49 AM (8mulE)

74 ----
Then Mars needs an onion tied to his belt...
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 03, 2026 09:49 AM (gnNyN)

Garlic. To ward off the vampires.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 09:49 AM (Zz0t1)

75 Cupid, just now; "stop, my ass is on fire!"

Posted by: Martini Farmer at June 03, 2026 09:50 AM (jehhT)

76 The red of Mars's tunic (appropriate for a god of war, where blood would be shed) and the blue of Cupid's broken quiver strap really make the scene pop.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:51 AM (wzUl9)

77 What is Venus clutching in her right hand?r

Additional arrows. They were hoping to give Mars a booster shot.

Posted by: t-bird at June 03, 2026 09:52 AM (moGJJ)

78 Good thing it's Cupid, and not a mammal of the infraorder Simiiformes (also known as simians). Traditionally, all animals in the group now known as simians are counted as monkeys except the apes. Thus monkeys, in that sense, constitute an incomplete paraphyletic grouping.

If it were a Simiiform, t'would be the monkey getting spanked.

Posted by: Wesley Crusher at June 03, 2026 09:52 AM (0sNs1)

79 So, a blindfold, cosplay angel wings, and spanking a minor?

Yeah, let's call CPS.

Posted by: Casual observer at June 03, 2026 09:52 AM (2Ez/1)

80 42 That is exactly how we interview interns here at Lincoln Project!
Posted by: Rick Wilson

Except the exposed tits would also be on men.

Posted by: Admiral Ackbar at June 03, 2026 09:52 AM (JCZqz)

81 Wakes up
Scratches
Looks around
Dang. Today's art is fascinating. I like it.
I think.
Goes looking for coffee.

Posted by: Diogenes at June 03, 2026 09:52 AM (2WIwB)

82 Painted three years before Shakespeare died.

Posted by: Delurker at June 03, 2026 09:52 AM (gtcuf)

83 Call CPS!

Posted by: vmom deport deport deport at June 03, 2026 09:53 AM (dE3DB)

84 44 It might be my imagination but Mars seems to have a hint of mustache. Maybe Mercury challenged him to grow one, and it's not coming in very well.

Freddy Mercury? He did have a hell of a stache

Posted by: C.D. Bales at June 03, 2026 09:53 AM (HcoTw)

85 So, a blindfold, cosplay angel wings, and spanking a minor?

Yeah, let's call CPS.
Posted by: Casual observer at June 03, 2026

***
Yeah, the blindfold is odd. Is it that Cupid, "love," is supposed to be blind? How does he control those arrows? And what does Justice have to say about this?

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:54 AM (wzUl9)

86 No dog. Can this truly be art?

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 09:54 AM (0sNs1)

87 The Dems asked Graham Platner if there was ANYTHING else they needed to worry about.

GP: Nah. Well, maybe one thing. Here, I'll demonstrate.

Posted by: Archimedes at June 03, 2026 09:55 AM (Riz8t)

88 I'm surprised there isn't a cat looking on and smirking.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:55 AM (wzUl9)

89 Platner loves his bottom stung by Daddy...

Posted by: Another Platner Scandal at June 03, 2026 09:56 AM (IqKsT)

90 Does Cupid have a carry license for that bow and those arrows? Let's see some ID, kid.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:56 AM (wzUl9)

91 Don’t nock Cupid’s archery skills.

Posted by: Bulg at June 03, 2026 09:56 AM (77rzZ)

92 >Yeah, the blindfold is odd. Is it that Cupid, "love," is supposed to be blind?

Love stinks...

Posted by: J. Geils at June 03, 2026 09:56 AM (NgqoH)

93 The doves are getting right out.

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 09:56 AM (xbf8A)

94 86 No dog. Can this truly be art?
Posted by: Duncanthrax

Maybe Cupid accidentally hit a woman and her pit bull last night, and that's why he's in trouble

Posted by: gKWVE at June 03, 2026 09:56 AM (gKWVE)

95
Mars was beating Cupid's fat ass
Venus said, "Mars, give him a pass!"
Vulcan sauntered by
With a gleam in his eye
Said, "Mars broke Cupid's tushie it's cracked!"

Posted by: SCTV at June 03, 2026 09:57 AM (iJfKG)

96 Quiver me timbers! Not one tattoo in the whole group.

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at June 03, 2026 09:57 AM (D1E+2)

97 91 Don’t nock Cupid’s archery skills.

He has a point

Posted by: C.D. Bales at June 03, 2026 09:57 AM (HcoTw)

98 92 Is it that Cupid, "love," is supposed to be blind?

Yes.

Posted by: Delurker at June 03, 2026 09:57 AM (gtcuf)

99 Maybe Cupid accidentally hit a woman and her pit bull last night, and that's why he's in trouble
Posted by: gKWVE

Mars: Now I've got to go down there and separate those two!

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 09:58 AM (xbf8A)

100 BAD Cupid! Bad! I TOLD you to leave Mommy alone … !

Posted by: Dr_No at June 03, 2026 09:58 AM (ayRl+)

101
Off Second City nick!

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 09:58 AM (iJfKG)

102 Painted three years before Shakespeare died.
Posted by: Delurker at June 03, 2026

***
Did ol' Bill ever have the Greek or Roman gods show up in one of his plays? Coriolanus, for instance?

[After checking]: No, that play looks to be all about terrestrial war and politics, not about Olympus.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:58 AM (wzUl9)

103 does a monoboob count?

Posted by: DanMan at June 03, 2026 09:59 AM (8uzBS)

104 Cupid had it coming.
Posted by: Winston

**********

Always Know What's Beyond Your Target - a limerick

He shot an arrow into the air
It fell to earth he knew not where
But to his great chagrin
It landed right within
The fleshy part of Mars' derriere!

Posted by: muldoon at June 03, 2026 09:59 AM (qgHp7)

105 The casual observer might think Venus is trying to ask Mars to stop spanking Cupid, but actually she's asking to be next.

Posted by: The ghost of Larry Flynt at June 03, 2026 10:00 AM (2Ez/1)

106 When Mars was alone with Venus in her boudoir, eros to the occasion.

Posted by: Bulg at June 03, 2026 10:00 AM (77rzZ)

107 I'd love to sharpen my comment skills chatting about Cupid's arrows, but I have to head over to the eyeglasses place for an exam. The Interstate signs are getting a little blurry while I'm driving, and I have to assume it's me. Later, folken!

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 10:00 AM (wzUl9)

108 When Mars was alone with Venus in her boudoir, eros to the occasion.

At which point, Cupid muttered "Coitus, foiled again".

Posted by: Archimedes at June 03, 2026 10:01 AM (Riz8t)

109 "Come here, Sidney, I want to chastise you."
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing (aka Eloquent Depression) at June 03, 2026 09:40 AM

*snort*

S'up, MP4? Are we going to see you in NoVa this month?

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at June 03, 2026 10:01 AM (bFu5X)

110 So, why is Cupid being chastised? Was it something he said or did?

Posted by: dantesed at June 03, 2026 10:01 AM (Oy/m2)

111 Posted by: muldoon at June 03, 2026 09:59 AM

*ponders adding this to the MoMe safety briefing*

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at June 03, 2026 10:02 AM (bFu5X)

112
*ponders adding this to the MoMe safety briefing*
Posted by: RedMindBlueState at June 03, 2026 10:02 AM (bFu5X)

I mean, shooting straight up is not recommended.......

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:03 AM (Zz0t1)

113 110 So, why is Cupid being chastised? Was it something he said or did?
Posted by: dantesed
------
He knows what he did.

Posted by: Karen Venus at June 03, 2026 10:04 AM (2Ez/1)

114 Hey, MP4, you teased a story yesterday about Sophia Loren having dinner at Audrey Hepburn’s house. Care to follow up?

Posted by: Bulg at June 03, 2026 10:04 AM (77rzZ)

115 Excellent question:

Sincere question because I honestly just want to see something:

Has there ever been a time when a Republican was behind and a bunch of late mail-in ballots pushed him or her into the lead?

If not, why aren’t Republicans ready to burn the ships over this?

https://tinyurl.com/35f95esm

FWIW, Steve Hilton is still in first place in CA.

Posted by: Archimedes at June 03, 2026 10:04 AM (Riz8t)

116 The chick popping her tit out wasn't enough to stop tantrum man.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 03, 2026 10:05 AM (snZF9)

117 Did ol' Bill ever have the Greek or Roman gods show up in one of his plays? Coriolanus, for instance?

[After checking]: No, that play looks to be all about terrestrial war and politics, not about Olympus.
Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere at June 03, 2026 09:58 AM (wzUl9)

Fairies were about as close as Ol' Shakey got to gods.

As in-

"A Midsummer' Night's Dream'

and

"The Tempest"

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 10:06 AM (iJfKG)

118 Seriously good painter.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 03, 2026 10:06 AM (snZF9)

119 bulg

I believe MP4 was referring to the famous black and white photo of those two

Posted by: one hour sober at June 03, 2026 10:06 AM (J4Dwc)

120 Hit me, hurt me, make me write bad checks -- Cupid

Posted by: Deplorable Ian Galt at June 03, 2026 10:07 AM (ufFY8)

121 What is the black thing in the bottom left corner? Is it th chastiser's helmet, maybe? I thought there might be a crow in there, but now I don't think so. It's just too dark to see any real shape in it, IMO.

Also, Why would he be chastising Cupid? Looks like he got a hottie for his wife (IMO).

Posted by: GWB at June 03, 2026 10:07 AM (kU0PQ)

122 Wait, I got my tits mixed up. That was Jayne Mansfield.

Posted by: one hour sober at June 03, 2026 10:08 AM (J4Dwc)

123 Cory’s Ol’ Anus?

Shakespeare wrote a play about Sen. Booker’s sex life?

Posted by: Bulg at June 03, 2026 10:08 AM (77rzZ)

124 It appears Naked, Coed Twister got a bit out of hand.

Posted by: Tonypete at June 03, 2026 10:08 AM (CIjhx)

125 Also...

A lot of broken arrows on the ground there. Mars went nuclear on Cupid.

IYKYK

Posted by: GWB at June 03, 2026 10:09 AM (kU0PQ)

126 Paw-Paw always made me go out back and cut a switch from the thicket for my beating.

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at June 03, 2026 10:10 AM (D1E+2)

127
It appears Naked, Coed Twister got a bit out of hand.
Posted by: Tonypete at June 03, 2026 10:08 AM (CIjhx)

Well, to be fair...Venus bought the S&M Expansion Pack.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 10:10 AM (iJfKG)

128 The chick popping her tit out wasn't enough to stop tantrum man.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 03, 2026 10:05 AM (snZF9)

I've actually been in a situation at one time in my life where this was actually attempted.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:12 AM (Zz0t1)

129 Venus was married to Vulcan, blacksmith of the gods. Venus and Mars were a couple, but not married.

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at June 03, 2026 10:13 AM (ZVgZ4)

130 129 Venus was married to Vulcan, blacksmith of the gods. Venus and Mars were a couple, but not married.

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at June 03, 2026 10:13 AM (ZVgZ4)

=====

Well, now one less person is wrong on the Internet.

All is well.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:14 AM (KbEzc)

131 Anatomy? You Hardly Know Me! - a limerick

Here's the question now, strictly between us
Are men from Mars? Women from Venus?
That's no longer the case
In women's spirts these days
Half of the women have a penis!

Posted by: muldoon at June 03, 2026 10:14 AM (qgHp7)

132
Jayne Mansfield?

https://youtu.be/LaW4MBwGhF0&t=37s

Posted by: Obligatory Seinfeld reference at June 03, 2026 10:15 AM (2Ez/1)

133
Caption Bible Above Mars' head-

"Why you little bastard! you made me fall in love with the Goddess of Love, who knows all the ways to please a man, I mean she knows all the ways. Even The Chinese Bumbershoot Triple Flex! And every Friday is Steak and Blowjob Day...and...and...uh...what was I doing here? I forgot...."

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 10:16 AM (iJfKG)

134 Venus was a hoe.

Posted by: ballistic at June 03, 2026 10:16 AM (oqH4h)

135 Oh, humans and their mythologies.

Hey look, a baby with wings. Hey look, a dude with wings. A horse with wings! A lion with wings! Wow!

....always slapping a pair of wings on their fake beings like it's special.

Ain't nobody was ever running around saying "hey look a pigeon what ain't got no wings. Wow, a chicken with just drumsticks. Oooooh, spiritual, Bumbles the Wingless Duck is really teaching me lessons about how to live, man."

Silly humans.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at June 03, 2026 10:17 AM (Ot/FD)

136 W the ever-loving F?!

Posted by: Weasel at June 03, 2026 10:17 AM (GNqmQ)

137 I cannot rest: there is someone wrong on the internet!

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at June 03, 2026 10:18 AM (ZVgZ4)

138 W the ever-loving F?!
Posted by: Weasel at June 03, 2026 10:17 AM

Venus has you covered, Weasel-san. She is both procuring more ammo, AND exhorting Mars to discipline with a purpose, not just plink.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 10:20 AM (0sNs1)

139 Wow, a chicken with just drumsticks. Oooooh, spiritual, Bumbles the Wingless Duck is really teaching me lessons about how to live, man."

Silly humans.
Posted by: Warai-otoko

Wanna talk about silly humans? Take a package of chicken legs up to a 16 yr old cashier and ask them if they are front legs or back legs.

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:21 AM (xbf8A)

140 116 The chick popping her tit out wasn't enough to stop tantrum man.
Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division

He would stop for THESE cannons!

Posted by: Lorna Hajdini at June 03, 2026 10:21 AM (JCZqz)

141 Venus was a hoe.
Posted by: ballistic

304 on the calculator from last thread.

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:22 AM (xbf8A)

142 Nobody wearing headbands these days.

Posted by: Ted Torgerson at June 03, 2026 10:22 AM (wGerL)

143 Venus has you covered, Weasel-san. She is both procuring more ammo, AND exhorting Mars to discipline with a purpose, not just plink.
Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 10:20 AM (0sNs1)
----
Well.... ok then.

Posted by: Weasel at June 03, 2026 10:22 AM (GNqmQ)

144 26 Paw-Paw always made me go out back and cut a switch from the thicket for my beating.
Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at June 03, 2026 10:10 AM (D1E+2)

My gramma, a willow tree, same purpose.

Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at June 03, 2026 10:22 AM (g8Ew8)

145 "No, Mars. You must break his arm. The lesson will last longer than just marks on his rear."

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:22 AM (KbEzc)

146 Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing (aka Eloquent Depression) at June 03, 2026 09:40 AM

You said yesterday to remind you to tell us a story. I don't remember who about, just that I was disappointed you didn't tell it at the time.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at June 03, 2026 10:23 AM (lFFaq)

147 Hot! Would hang!

Posted by: Graham Platner at June 03, 2026 10:24 AM (Fi81e)

148 134 Venus was a hoe.
Posted by: ballistic

Why you care so much about my body count? My past is my past, let's focus on the present. A real man isn't so insecure that he has to worry about my past. Sure, I've slept with thousands of dudes, but they all knew I was a hoe and it didn't stop them, so body count don't matter.

Posted by: Venus at June 03, 2026 10:24 AM (JCZqz)

149 Paw-Paw always made me go out back and cut a switch from the thicket for my beating.
Posted by: Rev. Wishbone

My gramma, a willow tree, same purpose.
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons

And woe be unto you if it wasn't big enough.

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:25 AM (xbf8A)

150 149 Paw-Paw always made me go out back and cut a switch from the thicket for my beating.
Posted by: Rev. Wishbone

My gramma, a willow tree, same purpose.
Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons

And woe be unto you if it wasn't big enough.

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:25 AM (xbf8A)

=====

"That's a paddlin'."

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:26 AM (KbEzc)

151 I've actually been in a situation at one time in my life where this was actually attempted.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer

But, did it work?

Posted by: Moron Analyst at June 03, 2026 10:26 AM (JCZqz)

152 Venus only exists because Zeus banged a sea scallop, or something.

Olympus was just Reality TV for toga people.

Posted by: Warai-otoko at June 03, 2026 10:26 AM (Ot/FD)

153 Today's art is a lot like my golf game yesterday. After the round I felt like I'd been flogged.
Horrible.

Posted by: Diogenes at June 03, 2026 10:26 AM (2WIwB)

154 I've actually been in a situation at one time in my life where this was actually attempted.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:12 AM (Zz0t1)

How'd it turn out?

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at June 03, 2026 10:27 AM (lFFaq)

155 153 Today's art is a lot like my golf game yesterday. After the round I felt like I'd been flogged.
Horrible.

Posted by: Diogenes at June 03, 2026 10:26 AM (2WIwB)

=====

Yeah, but you still might have done better than the other geezers.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:27 AM (KbEzc)

156 Reality TV for toga people.

Them old greek homos.

Posted by: Commissar of plenty and festive little hats at June 03, 2026 10:27 AM (Kt19C)

157 Well this is violent!

Posted by: Piper at June 03, 2026 10:28 AM (PRqXW)

158 154 I've actually been in a situation at one time in my life where this was actually attempted.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:12 AM (Zz0t1)

How'd it turn out?

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at June 03, 2026 10:27 AM (lFFaq)

======

Susan: D’you know what? I am gonna do this. I’m gonna do this just to show you how low, pathetic, and desperate you’ve all become!
Jeff: Result! *patrick pumps a fist*
Susan: But I want you to remember. I intend this breast satyrically.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:28 AM (KbEzc)

159 Posted by: Diogenes at June 03, 2026 10:26 AM (2WIwB)

Did Geezer Golf go the geezers' way this time?

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at June 03, 2026 10:29 AM (lFFaq)

160 Iran is utilizing "a clandestine shadow fleet to transport hundreds of millions of barrels of crude to China daily... a covert pipeline serving as a vital economic pipeline effectively bypassing US sanctions."
Posted by: Ordinary American at June 03, 2026 09:19 AM (fZiTB)

Sweet summer child. Reports that Iran has somehow been sending tankers (shadow fleet) through the Strait while avoiding detection is laughable.

NRO/Space Force satellites in geo-stationary orbit over the Persian Gulf and Gulf of Oman provide real-time surveillance feeds to CENTCOM identifying possible interlopers.

Match that with P-8 Poseidon aircraft flying around-the-clock ISR missions to investigate suspected targets means nothing is getting past the blockade unless one or more tankers are intentionally being allowed to pass.

Posted by: one hour sober at June 03, 2026 10:29 AM (J4Dwc)

161 129 Venus was married to Vulcan, blacksmith of the gods. Venus and Mars were a couple, but not married.

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at June 03, 2026 10:13 AM (ZVgZ4)

=====

Well, now one less person is wrong on the Internet.

All is well.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:14 AM (KbEzc)
--
Then if anything, VULCAN should be the one flogging Cupid for breaking up Vulcan's relationship with Venus.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 03, 2026 10:30 AM (gnNyN)

162 160 Sweet summer child. Reports that Iran has somehow been sending tankers (shadow fleet) through the Strait while avoiding detection is laughable.

NRO/Space Force satellites in geo-stationary orbit over the Persian Gulf and Gulf of Oman provide real-time surveillance feeds to CENTCOM identifying possible interlopers.

Match that with P-8 Poseidon aircraft flying around-the-clock ISR missions to investigate suspected targets means nothing is getting past the blockade unless one or more tankers are intentionally being allowed to pass.

Posted by: one hour sober at June 03, 2026 10:29 AM (J4Dwc)

========

"The US Navy won't have anything to counter turning off AIS!"
-apparently

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:30 AM (KbEzc)

163 Looks like Venus could use some gym time.

Posted by: Axeman at June 03, 2026 10:30 AM (Fi81e)

164 161 Then if anything, VULCAN should be the one flogging Cupid for breaking up Vulcan's relationship with Venus.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 03, 2026 10:30 AM (gnNyN)

======

Speaking of Oliver Reed...

His early career was filled with small parts in Hammer Film productions.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:31 AM (KbEzc)

165 Venus was married to Vulcan, blacksmith of the gods.

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at June 03, 2026 10:13 AM (ZVgZ4)
---
That doesn't sound logical.

Posted by: Axeman at June 03, 2026 10:31 AM (Fi81e)

166 165 Venus was married to Vulcan, blacksmith of the gods.

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at June 03, 2026 10:13 AM (ZVgZ4)
---
That doesn't sound logical.

Posted by: Axeman at June 03, 2026 10:31 AM (Fi81e)

======

Greeks weren't big into logic.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:32 AM (KbEzc)

167 Looks like Cupid did not deserve a Mars bar.

Posted by: Axeman at June 03, 2026 10:33 AM (Fi81e)

168 Reed was the lead in that one Hammer werewolf flick.

Posted by: Bulg at June 03, 2026 10:33 AM (77rzZ)

169 Speaking of Oliver Reed...

His early career was filled with small parts in Hammer Film productions.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:31 AM (KbEzc

With Uma Thurman as Venus... Time Bandits..

Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 10:33 AM (M52P1)

170 Vulcan made himself some fembots. He'll be fine.

Posted by: gKWVE at June 03, 2026 10:34 AM (gKWVE)

171 169 Speaking of Oliver Reed...

His early career was filled with small parts in Hammer Film productions.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:31 AM (KbEzc

With Uma Thurman as Venus... Time Bandits..
Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 10:33 AM (M52P1)

Nope .... That was Baron Munchausen...

Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 10:34 AM (M52P1)

172 171 With Uma Thurman as Venus... Time Bandits..
Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 10:33 AM (M52P1)

Nope .... That was Baron Munchausen...

Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 10:34 AM (M52P1)

======

Yeah, donna. Listen to donna.

Donna knows what she's talking about.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:34 AM (KbEzc)

173 Sweet summer child. Reports that Iran has somehow been sending tankers (shadow fleet) through the Strait while avoiding detection is laughable.

They've fallen for the Western media lies and bait. They didn't sink our fleet...they were all converted to submarines to sneak oil through the embargo. Check and mate, Trumplicans!!!

Posted by: IRGC at June 03, 2026 10:35 AM (JCZqz)

174 Yeah, donna. Listen to donna.

Donna knows what she's talking about.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:34 AM (KbEzc)

After I initially said it was Time Bandits

Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 10:35 AM (M52P1)

175 Warai-otoko: "Wings, wings, wings..."

**********

"Hewwwo?"

Posted by: muldoon at June 03, 2026 10:35 AM (qgHp7)

176 "Venus. The goddess. *My* wife."

- Vulcan

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at June 03, 2026 10:36 AM (bFu5X)

177 173 They've fallen for the Western media lies and bait. They didn't sink our fleet...they were all converted to submarines to sneak oil through the embargo. Check and mate, Trumplicans!!!

Posted by: IRGC at June 03, 2026 10:35 AM (JCZqz)

======

Which is proven by the massive demand destruction China!

That just means that China is getting the oil and storing it!

Nevermind the story of China discovering that it's purported 1.2 billion barrel strategic supply is actually just water.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:36 AM (KbEzc)

178 Greeks weren't big into logic.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:32 AM

Because they hadn't stolen it from the Africans yet?

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 10:36 AM (0sNs1)

179 Venus was married to Vulcan, blacksmith of the gods.

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at June 03, 2026 10:13 AM (ZVgZ4)
---
That doesn't sound logical.

Posted by: Axeman at June 03, 2026 10:31 AM (Fi81e)

======

Greeks weren't big into logic.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:32 AM (KbEzc)
---
Nah, it was probably the Pon Farr

(In which Axeman earns his Geek Achievement badge.)

Posted by: Axeman at June 03, 2026 10:38 AM (Fi81e)

180 179 Nah, it was probably the Pon Farr

(In which Axeman earns his Geek Achievement badge.)

Posted by: Axeman at June 03, 2026 10:38 AM (Fi81e)

======

Star Trek hearts have been broken.

So, Tuvix...

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:39 AM (KbEzc)

181 Iran is utilizing "a clandestine shadow fleet to transport hundreds of millions of barrels of crude to China daily... a covert pipeline serving as a vital economic pipeline effectively bypassing US sanctions."
Posted by: Ordinary American
_________

China imports about 12 million barrels per day. But now they're getting hundreds of millions of barrels per day from Iran alone?

Posted by: Biff Pocoroba at June 03, 2026 10:40 AM (XvL8K)

182 103 does a monoboob count?

one

Posted by: anachronda at June 03, 2026 10:40 AM (sGtp+)

183 >>>"Venus. The goddess. *My* wife."

- Vulcan

Posted by: RedMindBlueState

>Vulcan was cucked and Aries was the bull?

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at June 03, 2026 10:41 AM (D1E+2)

184 one
Posted by: anachronda at June 03, 2026 10:40 AM

The loneliest number.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 10:42 AM (0sNs1)

185 Iran is utilizing "a clandestine shadow fleet to transport hundreds of millions of barrels of crude to China daily... a covert pipeline serving as a vital economic pipeline effectively bypassing US sanctions."
Posted by: Ordinary American
_________

China imports about 12 million barrels per day. But now they're getting hundreds of millions of barrels per day from Iran alone?
Posted by: Biff Pocoroba

There isn't a boat in the Strait that the US Navy doesn't know about. Much less a "shadow fleet".

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:42 AM (xbf8A)

186 43 Just shit all over the 100 comment rule......
Posted by: Sponge

CBD punishing a rule violator while Sponge begs him to stop is what I get out of the painting.

Posted by: Auspex at June 03, 2026 10:42 AM (Y8DZL)

187 185
There isn't a boat in the Strait that the US Navy doesn't know about. Much less a "shadow fleet".

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:42 AM (xbf8A)

=======

The American Navy hasn't advanced since WWI.

All the smart people operate under this assumption.

You're smart, aren't you? So, you must accept this assumption.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:42 AM (KbEzc)

188 Speaking of Iran... Trump admitted in an interview that he called Bibi F'ing crazy and all the other stuff.. Evidently he was mad Israel was blowing up whole apartment buildings to kill one Hezbollah..

Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 10:45 AM (M52P1)

189 Thankful to be done with the non-stop TV ads from the foreign Maoist running for Congress.

The pedo Marxist who won barely ran any.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 03, 2026 10:45 AM (RIvkX)

190 The American Navy hasn't advanced since WWI.

All the smart people operate under this assumption.

You're smart, aren't you? So, you must accept this assumption.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison

FINALLY! Someone called me smart! Suck it, bitchez!

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:46 AM (xbf8A)

191 Greeks weren't big into logic.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:32 AM

Because they hadn't stolen it from the Africans yet?
Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 10:36 AM (0sNs1)

For example-

The painting above is a world famous African mythological story stolen and almost distorted beyond recognition...

The Story of how Kumakuma the Warthog God whipped Dombaba the Crocodile with Uluhulu the Gaboon Viper God for stealing a Goochootalum Berry Pie from Balongachu the Earth Mother of All Hippopotami.

And now, finally, you know the true story!

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 10:46 AM (iJfKG)

192 IIRC, the other Olympians decided to give Venus to Vulcan because he was lame and ugly, as a recompense.

Posted by: Bulg at June 03, 2026 10:46 AM (77rzZ)

193 Iran is utilizing "a clandestine shadow fleet to transport hundreds of millions of barrels of crude to China daily... a covert pipeline serving as a vital economic pipeline effectively bypassing US sanctions."
Posted by: Ordinary American at June 03, 2026 09:19 AM (fZiTB)

A secret pipeline, huh? And exactly how do YOU know about this?

Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at June 03, 2026 10:46 AM (g8Ew8)

194 189 Thankful to be done with the non-stop TV ads from the foreign Maoist running for Congress.

The pedo Marxist who won barely ran any.
Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 03, 2026 10:45 AM (RIvkX)

The weird faggy guy running for SanFranNan's seat ?

Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 10:46 AM (M52P1)

195 Thankful to be done with the non-stop TV ads from the foreign Maoist running for Congress.

Yeah. I was tired of seeing Cornyn's mug.

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:46 AM (xbf8A)

196 Uma Thurman?

https://youtu.be/38Y16I7sB-Y

Posted by: Obligatory Seinfeld reference at June 03, 2026 10:46 AM (2Ez/1)

197 >>There isn't a boat in the Strait that the US Navy doesn't know about.

Which was also the case in 1987 during Operation Earnest Will. And that was while deploying ISR-mission aircraft employing 1980s technology.

Posted by: one hour sober at June 03, 2026 10:47 AM (J4Dwc)

198 Iran is utilizing "a clandestine shadow fleet to transport hundreds of millions of barrels of crude to China daily... a covert pipeline serving as a vital economic pipeline effectively bypassing US sanctions."
Posted by: Ordinary American

While oil tankers can vary significantly in capacity, with Very Large Crude Carriers (VLCCs) typically able to carry about 2 million barrels of crude oil, while Ultra Large Crude Carriers (ULCCs) can hold up to 3.7 million barrels. Smaller more common tankers, like Aframax, usually carry between 500,000 to 750,000 barrels.

Assuming a spherical cow, how many ships would it take to deliver hundreds of millions of barrels of oil a day to China? (Hint: remember to factor in transit time, as well as the return trip into your answer.)

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 10:47 AM (0sNs1)

199 The weird faggy guy running for SanFranNan's seat ?
Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 10:46 AM (M52P1)
====

Scott Weiner, the next Congressman.

Step aside Tom Lantos.
Step aside John Burton.
Step aside Nancy Pelosi.
It's Pedo Time!

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 03, 2026 10:48 AM (RIvkX)

200 198 While oil tankers can vary significantly in capacity, with Very Large Crude Carriers (VLCCs) typically able to carry about 2 million barrels of crude oil, while Ultra Large Crude Carriers (ULCCs) can hold up to 3.7 million barrels. Smaller more common tankers, like Aframax, usually carry between 500,000 to 750,000 barrels.

Assuming a spherical cow, how many ships would it take to deliver hundreds of millions of barrels of oil a day to China? (Hint: remember to factor in transit time, as well as the return trip into your answer.)

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 10:47 AM (0sNs1)

======

Normal traffic should take 9-10 days.

That's roughly 40 super tankers constantly moving through the Gulf of Oman, past American naval vessels looking for large cargo vessels.

I wonder if anyone could name any of these super sekrit super tankers keeping Iran afloat financially.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:49 AM (KbEzc)

201 Yeah. I was tired of seeing Cornyn's mug.
Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:46 AM (xbf8A)
======

Sure, go ahead. Mock my misery.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 03, 2026 10:49 AM (RIvkX)

202 Vulcan introduces Baron Munchausen to his wife, the goddess Venus (as played by a very young Uma Thurman):

https://m.youtube.com/
watch?v=7Zi-bP8MinQ&ra=m

(Copy and remove spaces to use URL).

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at June 03, 2026 10:49 AM (ZVgZ4)

203 Scott Weiner, the next Congressman.

Step aside Tom Lantos.
Step aside John Burton.
Step aside Nancy Pelosi.
It's Pedo Time!
Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 03, 2026 10:48 AM (RIvkX)

Really creepy

Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 10:50 AM (M52P1)

204 202 (Copy and remove spaces to use URL).

Posted by: NemoMeImpuneLacessit at June 03, 2026 10:49 AM (ZVgZ4)

======

YOU'RE NOT MY SUPERVISOR!

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:50 AM (KbEzc)

205 "The Baron is dancing with your wiiiiife....."

- Little shit who grew up to be a commie radical

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at June 03, 2026 10:50 AM (bFu5X)

206
Iran is utilizing "a clandestine shadow fleet to transport hundreds of millions of barrels of crude to China daily... a covert pipeline serving as a vital economic pipeline effectively bypassing US sanctions."
Posted by: Ordinary American

Yes, of course.

The Iranians outsmarted Trump by running a secret pipeline through the Secret Jungle inside the Hollow Earth.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 10:50 AM (iJfKG)

207 China imports about 12 million barrels per day. But now they're getting hundreds of millions of barrels per day from Iran alone?
---
The Strait of Hormuz is both narrow enough that Iran can control it via a few speedboats launched from the coast ...
but also vast enough that the entire US military, with the most advanced detection capabilities in the world, still cannot detect hundreds of supertankers passing through.

It's "The Science" you retards.

Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at June 03, 2026 10:51 AM (73/SM)

208 While oil tankers can vary significantly in capacity, with Very Large Crude Carriers (VLCCs) typically able to carry about 2 million barrels of crude oil, while Ultra Large Crude Carriers (ULCCs) can hold up to 3.7 million barrels. Smaller more common tankers, like Aframax, usually carry between 500,000 to 750,000 barrels.

Assuming a spherical cow, how many ships would it take to deliver hundreds of millions of barrels of oil a day to China? (Hint: remember to factor in transit time, as well as the return trip into your answer.)
Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 10:47 AM (0sNs1)

This is suspiciously sounding like math.

Posted by: Dr. Pork Chops & Bacons at June 03, 2026 10:51 AM (g8Ew8)

209 I've never seen a spherical cow
I hope to never see one.
But I can tell you anyhow
I'd rather see than be one.

Posted by: Young Ogden at June 03, 2026 10:51 AM (2Ez/1)

210 The Strait of Hormuz is both narrow enough that Iran can control it via a few speedboats launched from the coast ...
but also vast enough that the entire US military, with the most advanced detection capabilities in the world, still cannot detect hundreds of supertankers passing through.

It's "The Science" you retards.
Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at June 03, 2026 10:51 AM (73/SM)
----
Yes! Exactly! This guy GETS IT!

Posted by: The Media at June 03, 2026 10:52 AM (gnNyN)

211 The Iranians outsmarted Trump by running a secret pipeline through the Secret Jungle inside the Hollow Earth.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 10:50 AM

Hoover Dam! They're onto us. Smile and wave, boys, smile and wave....

- The Penguins

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at June 03, 2026 10:52 AM (bFu5X)

212
But, did it work?
Posted by: Moron Analyst at June 03, 2026 10:26 AM (JCZqz)

Sort of, but not really. It still took a bit for things to calm down.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:52 AM (Zz0t1)

213 Here comes the cheat. See if you can spot the problem.

>>@data_republican
·
2h
>>This IS IMPOSSIBLE, and yet, the Senate will not pass the Save America Act.

>>39.3% vote in…
Karen Bass had 117,579
Spencer Pratt had 86,323

>>42.4% vote in…
Karen Bass 130,429
Spencer Pratt 86,323

Posted by: JackStraw at June 03, 2026 10:53 AM (viF8m)

214 But, did it work?
Posted by: Moron Analyst at June 03, 2026 10:26 AM (JCZqz)

Sort of, but not really. It still took a bit for things to calm down.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:52 AM

Not succulent enough?

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 10:53 AM (0sNs1)

215 213 Here comes the cheat. See if you can spot the problem.

>>@data_republican
·
2h
>>This IS IMPOSSIBLE, and yet, the Senate will not pass the Save America Act.

>>39.3% vote in…
Karen Bass had 117,579
Spencer Pratt had 86,323

>>42.4% vote in…
Karen Bass 130,429
Spencer Pratt 86,323

Posted by: JackStraw at June 03, 2026 10:53 AM (viF8m)

======

SAVE act wouldn't apply to local elections.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:53 AM (KbEzc)

216 Step aside Tom Lantos.
Step aside John Burton.
Step aside Nancy Pelosi.
It's Pedo Time!
Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 03, 2026 10:48 AM (RIvkX)

....is convinced everyone in California is on dope.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:54 AM (Zz0t1)

217 Iran is utilizing "a clandestine shadow fleet to transport hundreds of millions of barrels of crude to China daily... a covert pipeline serving as a vital economic pipeline effectively bypassing US sanctions."
Posted by: Ordinary American
_________

China imports about 12 million barrels per day. But now they're getting hundreds of millions of barrels per day from Iran alone?

Forget it. He's rolling.

Posted by: Archimedes at June 03, 2026 10:54 AM (Riz8t)

218
Not succulent enough?
Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 10:53 AM (0sNs1)

Actually, similar size to the painting, funny enough.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:54 AM (Zz0t1)

219 217 Forget it. He's rolling.

Posted by: Archimedes at June 03, 2026 10:54 AM (Riz8t)

=======

I thought he was pre-Med.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:54 AM (KbEzc)

220 China imports about 12 million barrels per day. But now they're getting hundreds of millions of barrels per day from Iran alone?
---
The Strait of Hormuz is both narrow enough that Iran can control it via a few speedboats launched from the coast ...
but also vast enough that the entire US military, with the most advanced detection capabilities in the world, still cannot detect hundreds of supertankers passing through.

It's "The Science" you retards.
Posted by: People's Hippo Voice

Sounds more like retarded science.

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:54 AM (xbf8A)

221 Step aside Tom Lantos.
Step aside John Burton.
Step aside Nancy Pelosi.
It's Pedo Time!
Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 03, 2026 10:48 AM (RIvkX)

....is convinced everyone in California is on dope.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:54 AM (Zz0t1)

CALIFORNIA

This Is Your State On Dope!

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 10:55 AM (iJfKG)

222 I'm at a loss as to what is happening in Iran now. I was giving it to June 1 to see. I still don't see. I don't think I have enough info to judge but it's not looking good.

Posted by: ... at June 03, 2026 10:55 AM (vQBGy)

223
Sounds more like retarded science.
Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:54 AM (xbf8A)

You've blinded me with Science....

Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 10:55 AM (M52P1)

224 ....is convinced everyone in California is on dope.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer

The fact that Bass leads tells me they want the pain.

Posted by: rickb223 at June 03, 2026 10:55 AM (xbf8A)

225 Not succulent enough?
+++
Used to date her.

Posted by: But we broke up at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (2Ez/1)

226 ....is convinced everyone in California is on dope.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:54 AM

I warned you people!

Posted by: Mr. Hand at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (bFu5X)

227 212 So her tits weren’t calmed?

Posted by: Bulg at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (77rzZ)

228 >>SAVE act wouldn't apply to local elections.

And you think they're only doing this in local elections?

Posted by: JackStraw at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (viF8m)

229 ....is convinced everyone in California is on dope.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:54 AM

Have you considered that some (many?) of them may be just dopes, and of those who are on dope would be dope-dopes?

Venn diagrams are wonderful!

Posted by: Kamala! 2028! 2032! at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (0sNs1)

230 Holy shit.

Cow worker storms in. I say good morning. He lays into me about how some guy in a MAGA hat was harassing his trans friend last night and how he doesn’t want to speak to anyone associated with that movement.

So I got that going for me.

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (W2Pud)

231 222 I'm at a loss as to what is happening in Iran now. I was giving it to June 1 to see. I still don't see. I don't think I have enough info to judge but it's not looking good.

Posted by: ... at June 03, 2026 10:55 AM (vQBGy)

======

Iran is starving and destroying its economy because the leadership values its nuclear stockpile (which might not exist anymore) over leadership of its own nation.

All while oil finds a way.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (KbEzc)

232 Hot Stuff

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 03, 2026 10:57 AM (e0ARE)

233
CBD punishing a rule violator while Sponge begs him to stop is what I get out of the painting.
Posted by: Auspex at June 03, 2026 10:42 AM (Y8DZL)

I support the 100 comment rule. Punish away.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:57 AM (Zz0t1)

234 228 >>SAVE act wouldn't apply to local elections.

And you think they're only doing this in local elections?

Posted by: JackStraw at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (viF8m)

======

Why would you make that logical leap?

The post was about how the SAVE act would stop this in...local and state elections.

Passing the SAVE act at the federal level...would do nothing to stop this from happening in CA at the state and local level.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:57 AM (KbEzc)

235 The chick popping her tit out wasn't enough to stop tantrum man.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 03, 2026 10:05 AM (snZF9)

I've actually been in a situation at one time in my life where this was actually attempted.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:12 AM (Zz0t1)

Thats a story I want to hear. lol

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 03, 2026 10:57 AM (snZF9)

236 230 Holy shit.

Cow worker storms in. I say good morning. He lays into me about how some guy in a MAGA hat was harassing his trans friend last night and how he doesn’t want to speak to anyone associated with that movement.

So I got that going for me.

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (W2Pud)

======

Seattle is MAGA country.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:58 AM (KbEzc)

237 He lays into me about how some guy in a MAGA hat was harassing his trans friend last night and how he doesn’t want to speak to anyone associated with that movement.

So I got that going for me.

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (W2Pud)

You should remind him that if we're doing Guilt By Association, his trans friend is likely to be a mass shooter, and you're worried about your cow worker's safety.

Posted by: Washington Nearsider: Gotterdammerung, DURING PRIDE MONTH IS EVIL! at June 03, 2026 10:58 AM (Kdi1r)

238 Iran is starving and destroying its economy because the leadership values its nuclear stockpile (which might not exist anymore) over leadership of its own nation.

All while oil finds a way.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (KbEzc)

OIL

The Most Intelligent and Sneaky Of All Minerals!

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 10:58 AM (iJfKG)

239 238
OIL

The Most Intelligent and Sneaky Of All Minerals!

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 10:58 AM (iJfKG)

=======

Markets find ways around disruption.

It's a thing.

So weird. If only people had written books about it!

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:59 AM (KbEzc)

240
Cow worker storms in. I say good morning. He lays into me about how some guy in a MAGA hat was harassing his trans friend last night and how he doesn’t want to speak to anyone associated with that movement.

So I got that going for me.
Posted by: nurse ratched at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (W2Pud)

This did not happen to that guy.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:59 AM (Zz0t1)

241 I used to draw a lot of cow workers.

Posted by: Ghost of Gary Larson at June 03, 2026 10:59 AM (2Ez/1)

242 >>Why would you make that logical leap?

Becuase that is obviously what data_republican was suggesting. Democrats cheat in elections, local and federal. She is using that as an example.

It's not a logical leap. It's a very clear indication that this is what Democrat have always done and we all know it.

Posted by: JackStraw at June 03, 2026 10:59 AM (viF8m)

243 240
Cow worker storms in. I say good morning. He lays into me about how some guy in a MAGA hat was harassing his trans friend last night and how he doesn’t want to speak to anyone associated with that movement.

So I got that going for me.
Posted by: nurse ratched at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (W2Pud)

This did not happen to that guy.
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:59 AM (Zz0t1)

Right... What person would be crazy enough to wear a MAGA hat in Seattle ?

Posted by: It's me donna at June 03, 2026 11:00 AM (M52P1)

244 241 Gary Larson is still with us.

Posted by: Bulg at June 03, 2026 11:01 AM (77rzZ)

245 Try, try again.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 03, 2026 11:01 AM (e0ARE)

246 Cow worker storms in. I say good morning. He...

Wouldn't that be a bull worker?

Posted by: Button-Pushing-Monkey at June 03, 2026 11:01 AM (EcHpA)

247 Oops. Sorry about that.

Posted by: Ghost of Gary Larson at June 03, 2026 11:01 AM (2Ez/1)

248 242 >>Why would you make that logical leap?

Becuase that is obviously what data_republican was suggesting. Democrats cheat in elections, local and federal. She is using that as an example.

It's not a logical leap. It's a very clear indication that this is what Democrat have always done and we all know it.

Posted by: JackStraw at June 03, 2026 10:59 AM (viF8m)

======

It's honestly a bad example because she's saying the SAVE Act would prevent this. And the SAVE Act won't prevent this.

Think critically.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 11:02 AM (KbEzc)

249 OIL

The Most Intelligent and Sneaky Of All Minerals!

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 10:58 AM (iJfKG)

=======

Markets find ways around disruption.

It's a thing.

So weird. If only people had written books about it!
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 10:59 AM (KbEzc)

They have those books are shelved right next to the books on How Jokes Work at your local library.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 11:02 AM (iJfKG)

250 Cow worker storms in. I say good morning. He lays into me about how some guy in a MAGA hat was harassing his trans friend last night and how he doesn’t want to speak to anyone associated with that movement.

So I got that going for me.
Posted by: nurse ratched at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM

Happy Hump Day, nurse!

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at June 03, 2026 11:02 AM (bFu5X)

251 Remember:
90% of those in the media who write about the Strait of Hormuz have built their entire understanding on the size of bodies of water from crossing the Brooklyn Bridge.

Another 5% are informed by a visit to the Golden Gate.

Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at June 03, 2026 11:02 AM (73/SM)

252 249 They have those books are shelved right next to the books on How Jokes Work at your local library.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 11:02 AM (iJfKG)

=======

I wasn't correcting you. I was adding to the absurdity.

But, I'm an illiterate asshole, so it came off poorly.

Mea culpa.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 11:02 AM (KbEzc)

253

Cow Orker > Cow Worker

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 11:03 AM (iJfKG)

254 U nas yest’ NOOD.

Posted by: Bulg at June 03, 2026 11:03 AM (77rzZ)

255 235 The chick popping her tit out wasn't enough to stop tantrum man.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 03, 2026 10:05 AM (snZF9)

I've actually been in a situation at one time in my life where this was actually attempted.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 10:12 AM (Zz0t1)

Thats a story I want to hear. lol

pretty sure they're talking about an episode of coupling

Posted by: anachronda at June 03, 2026 11:03 AM (sGtp+)

256 Right... What person would be crazy enough to wear a MAGA hat in Seattle ?
--
We are legion.
/s/ MAGA Country, Chicago Chapter

Posted by: People's Hippo Voice at June 03, 2026 11:04 AM (73/SM)

257 Think critically.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 11:02 AM

And yet, we still don't have our definitive ranking of the films of Russ Meyer.

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 11:04 AM (0sNs1)

258
Thats a story I want to hear. lol
Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 03, 2026 10:57 AM (snZF9)

IF I remember it correctly, there was a party at my parents house, no parents, and a girl, high school age, was drinking heavily, but also a diabetic or some such. I wanted her gone because yeah, no. Her cousin was attempting to get her to leave, but another girl was pissing at me telling me it wasn't my house because my name wasn't on the deed. Others finally got those 2 idiots to head towards the door and one guy's girlfriend decided that whipping the tits out was a good way to get things moving.

I will admit a momentary distraction, but I'd seen them before, they were small, and the twat that was not heeding my demands to get the f*ck out of MY house and take her stupid ass friend with her before shit got real regained my attention.

They did finally leave.

Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 11:05 AM (Zz0t1)

259 They have those books are shelved right next to the books on How Jokes Work at your local library.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 11:02 AM (iJfKG)

=======

I wasn't correcting you. I was adding to the absurdity.

But, I'm an illiterate asshole, so it came off poorly.

Mea culpa.
Posted by: TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films at June 03, 2026 11:02 AM (KbEzc)

I wasn't sure.

Forgive my persnickety attitude.

Posted by: naturalfake at June 03, 2026 11:05 AM (iJfKG)

260 Munkey Nood.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at June 03, 2026 11:05 AM (bFu5X)

261 Right... What person would be crazy enough to wear a MAGA hat in Seattle ?
Posted by: It's me donna
---

Prolly a pot smoker. →

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 03, 2026 11:06 AM (e0ARE)

262 What person would be crazy enough to wear a MAGA hat in Seattle ?

Posted by: It's me donna

Crazy?

Nope. Just armed.

Posted by: Washington Nearsider: Gotterdammerung, DURING PRIDE MONTH IS EVIL! at June 03, 2026 11:07 AM (Kdi1r)

263 Posted by: nurse ratched at June 03, 2026 10:56 AM (W2Pud)

Well there's a story you're not getting the entirety of.

No doubt they had something to say to him about his hat before the "harassment" started.

Posted by: ... at June 03, 2026 11:07 AM (vQBGy)

264 but I'd seen them before
Posted by: Sponge - F*ck Cancer at June 03, 2026 11:05 AM

Yeah? What was the Montgomery's tubercles count?

Posted by: Duncanthrax at June 03, 2026 11:07 AM (0sNs1)

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