Overnight Open Thread [06/01/2026]

It is tempting to assume that the physical beauty of America is dominated by its magnificent mountains and deserts and coasts. But a trip through the heartland reveals the quiet beauty of our rich agricultural tradition, and the subtle glories of American farmland and prairie. Or the gentle rolling hills of Texas or the steeper ones of New Hampshire. Or the endless forests of the mid-Atlantic. It's all wonderful!

Before all else, be armed.

-- Niccolo Machiavelli

It is far better to be alone, than to be in bad company.

-- George Washington

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.

-- Winston Churchill

Liberty does not exist in the absence of morality.

-- Edmund Burke

Virtue is more to be feared than vice, because its excesses are not subject to the regulation of conscience.

-- Adam Smith

******
Here's Richie Havens playing Going Back To My Roots. Good music by an underrated singer.
******

[HatTip: TC]

******
Whistleblower claims CIA used DNA data from Ancestry and 23andMe customers in search for aliens

Jorjani claimed that he was alerted to this bug-hunting initiative by army veteran Lyn Buchanan, who claims he was a “psychic spy” with the CIA’s remote viewing program — which investigated whether individuals could use extrasensory perception to conduct recon on distant objects, events or people.
Jorjani. 3
“They live in like small towns in the [Colorado] Rockies, and they pass because they look like tall Scandinavian people,” remarked Jorjani (pictured). YouTube/@jessemichels
Jorjani said Buchanan had informed him that former CIA analyst and UAP specialist Christopher “Kit” Green had devised a backdoor way of accessing 23andMe and Ancestry — uber-popular sites that break down users’ family trees — to screen users for a specific “genetic variance” linked to nonhuman beings.
Green was notably part of the Remote Viewing Program in the 1970s, but left the intelligence agency long before the founding of the DNA detective sites.
Buchanan reportedly learned of this so-called campaign after being approached at a diner by three individuals claiming to be Nordics — tall, blue-eyed, blond visitors from beyond that are said to be living covertly among us.

******
Great movie lines! There are thousands, and these popped into my head in a matter of seconds. Have at it with your own favorites, although be warned, YouTube doesn't have all of them neatly cut out of the movies. One of my favorites is nowhere to be found: "Words...just words!" Identify it first and you get a Balsa Membership with Troll-B-Gon add-on.
*
How dare you show your back to me!
*
I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit
*

Two days ago I saw a vehicle that'd haul that tanker
*
It's just a flesh wound
******

The French Note

Glen took a dream vacation to Paris. He saw the Eiffel Tower, toured the Louvre and took a boat ride down the Seine. He definitely wanted to have some haute French cuisine, so he picked out the nicest restaurant he could afford. He was waiting for his table at the bar when the beautiful bartender dropped a note in front of him. It was in French, which he couldn’t read. When he was seated, he asked his waiter if he could tell him what it said. The waiter said, “Yes, of course, let me see it.” Upon reading it, the waiter had Glen forcibly removed from the restaurant.
Now Glen was sitting on the curb outside the restaurant, trying to figure out what just happened. A police officer came by and asked what he was doing. Glen explained “Well, I came to take my dream vacation to Paris. I saw the Eiffel Tower, toured the Louvre and took a boat ride down the Seine. I definitely wanted to have some haute French cuisine, so I picked out the nicest restaurant I could afford. I was waiting for my table at the bar when a beautiful bartender dropped a note in front of me. It was in French, which I can’t read. When I was seated, I asked my waiter if he could tell me what it said. The waiter said of course, but upon reading it, the waiter had me forcibly removed from the restaurant.”
“Hhmmmm…” said the police officer “You better let me see this note.” So Glen gave note to the police officer. Upon reading the note the officer put Glen under arrest.
Glen was brought before a magistrate, where he protested “Your honor, I have done nothing wrong, I don’t know why I’m here. See I came to take my dream vacation to Paris. I saw the Eiffel Tower, toured the Louvre and took a boat ride down the Seine. I definitely wanted to have some haute French cuisine, so I picked out the nicest restaurant I could afford. I was waiting for my table at the bar when a beautiful bartender dropped a note in front of me. It was in French, which I can’t read. When I was seated, I asked my waiter if he could tell me what it said. The waiter said of course, but upon reading it, he had me forcibly removed from the restaurant. Then I was sitting on the curb outside the restaurant when a police officer came by, and after I let him see the note he put me under arrest.”
“Bring this note forward.” Ordered the judge. Glen gave the note to the judge. Upon reading the note the judge ordered Glen to be exiled from France.
Glen soon found himself on an airplane out of France back to America, which annoyed him as he still had several days left in his trip. A French businessman seated next Glen asked him, “So what’s your story?”
Glen took a deep breath and then said “It started when I came to take my dream vacation to Paris. I saw the Eiffel Tower, toured the Louvre and took a boat ride down the Seine. I definitely wanted to have some haute French cuisine, so I picked out the nicest restaurant I could afford. I was waiting for my table at the bar when a beautiful bartender dropped a note in front of me. It was in French, which I can’t read. When I was seated, I asked my waiter if he could tell me what it said. The waiter said of course, but upon reading it, the waiter had me forcibly removed from the restaurant. Then I was sitting on the curb outside the restaurant when a police officer came by, and after I let him see the note he put me under arrest. I was subsequently brought before a judge, and when he saw the note, he ordered me to be exiled from France. And I still don’t even know what it says.”
“That’s quite a tale.” Remarked the businessman. “Do you still have this note?” Glen did and he gave it to the businessman. Except, instead of telling Glen what it said, he paged a flight attendant over. The flight attendant read the note and then went to talk to the pilot. Upon reading the note, the pilot personally threw Glen out of the plane.
Now the pilot wasn’t completely heartless, he did give Glen a parachute first. Glen didn’t see that it mattered too much one way or the other, as they were over the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. However, as it happened, a ship was passing by and Glen was able to land right on it. Naturally Glen was brought before the captain, who wanted to know how Glen came to be on his ship. Glen explained “My story starts with what I thought would be my dream vacation to Paris. I saw the Eiffel Tower, toured the Louvre and took a boat ride down the Seine. I definitely wanted to have some haute French cuisine, so I picked out the nicest restaurant I could afford. I was waiting for my table at the bar when a beautiful bartender dropped a note in front of me. It was in French, which I can’t read. When I was seated, I asked my waiter if he could tell me what it said. The waiter said of course, but upon reading it, the waiter had me forcibly removed from the restaurant. Then I was sitting on the curb outside the restaurant when a police officer came by, and after I let him see the note he put me under arrest. I was subsequently brought before a judge, and when he saw the note, he ordered me to be exiled from France. And I still couldn’t believe it when the pilot of my plane found out what the note said he had me thrown out of the plane.”
“Wow. That must be some note.” exclaimed the captain. “You must let me read it, I speak French.”
“No,” replied Glen “I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to show it to anyone else.” Everyone was disappointed, but Glen was firm that no one would get to see this note. They found a bunk for Glen to stay in for the week-long trip to America. It was a cargo ship, and everyone else was working, so Glen thought that he ought to work as well even though no one asked him to. He helped prep food, serve and clean up in the mess hall. Everyone agreed that they were better off having Glen make the coffee. He was even offered a permanent position upon the ship.
Of course people kept pestering Glen to see this famous note, but he kept it a secret. Towards the end of the journey, as he felt that he had gotten to know everyone and bonded with them, he decided that it would be ok to show the captain the note.
Glen was immediately thrown overboard.
He was close enough at this point that he could swim ashore to his home state of New Jersey. After getting home and cleaning himself up, Glen called his girlfriend.
“Glen!” She cried “You weren’t on your return flight, I made so many phone calls, I had no idea what had happened, I thought you were dead!”
Glen took a deep breath and began explaining. “As you know I went off on what I thought would be my dream vacation to Paris. I saw the Eiffel Tower, toured the Louvre and took a boat ride down the Seine. I definitely wanted to have some haute French cuisine, so I picked out the nicest restaurant I could afford. I was waiting for my table at the bar when a rather unattractive bartender dropped a note in front of me. It was in French, which I can’t read. When I was seated, I asked my waiter if he could tell me what it said. The waiter said of course, but upon reading it, the waiter had me forcibly removed from the restaurant. Then I was sitting on the curb outside the restaurant when a police officer came by, and after I let him see the note he put me under arrest. I was subsequently brought before a judge, and when he saw the note, he ordered me to be exiled from France. And I still couldn’t believe it when the pilot of my plane found out what the note said he had me thrown out of the plane. I wouldn’t have survived except I had the luck to land on a passing ship. I didn’t want to show them the note, you understand, but for a week they badgered me to see it, and I still had no idea what it said, so I eventually let them see it. Inevitably once they saw it they threw me overboard. I still have the damn note--the paper is very good quality--and the mystery is killing me.”
Glen’s girlfriend had some doubts about this story, but instead of directly calling Glen out about it, she offered “My uncle speaks French, we could ask him what it says.”
So the two of them met and headed over to the uncle’s house. Glen told his story to the uncle--which we will omit here in the interest of time--and checked that there were no firearms in the house before handing over the note.
The uncle said, “I can translate this for you, just let me get my reading glasses.” The uncle put the note down on the coffee table and went to get his glasses. Just then a gust of wind came through and blew the note out the window, and it was never to be seen again.

******

******

The Far Side

******
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Posted by: CBD at 09:56 PM

Comments

(Jump to bottom of comments)

1 hello, hello, hello

Posted by: IS Roth at June 01, 2026 09:58 PM (jOiUM)

2 Vienna calling

Posted by: IS Roth at June 01, 2026 09:59 PM (jOiUM)

3 I'm just bolled over by the top pic.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at June 01, 2026 10:00 PM (1Ff7Z)

4 1st

Posted by: JohnFNotKerry at June 01, 2026 10:00 PM (g14+z)

5 Corgis summoned

Posted by: SciVo at June 01, 2026 10:00 PM (Sy6m/)

6 Evening.

Posted by: ballistic at June 01, 2026 10:00 PM (oqH4h)

7 dang it now for the content

Posted by: JohnFNotKerry at June 01, 2026 10:00 PM (g14+z)

8 Good evening morons und danke CBD

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 01, 2026 10:00 PM (RIvkX)

9 Roustabout

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 10:01 PM (M4gnG)

10 "Words...just words" is from Star Trek II.

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at June 01, 2026 10:01 PM (CHHv1)

11 Why would aliens submit their DNS to a human website?

Don't they know where they come from?

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at June 01, 2026 10:02 PM (CHHv1)

12 Meow

Posted by: Lurking Cheshirecat at June 01, 2026 10:02 PM (w3u3d)

13
Oh, when those cotton bolls get rotten,
You can't pick very much cotton

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at June 01, 2026 10:02 PM (ixS3i)

14 Jorjani said Buchanan had informed him that former CIA analyst and UAP specialist Christopher “Kit” Green had devised a backdoor way of accessing 23andMe and Ancestry — uber-popular sites that break down users’ family trees — to screen users for a specific “genetic variance” linked to nonhuman beings.
====
State of California sued 23andMe last week for data security breaches.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 01, 2026 10:02 PM (RIvkX)

15 I don't know where the first quote came from. I know the rest of them.

Posted by: polynikes at June 01, 2026 10:02 PM (WNOcj)

16
It is far better to be alone, then to be in bad company.

-- George Washington

____________

*looks around ONT*

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 01, 2026 10:03 PM (O0L8i)

17 "Words...just words" is from Star Trek II.

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at June 01, 2026 10:01 PM (CHHv1)

That guess is so shitty I am demoting you to a wet cardboard membership.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 01, 2026 10:03 PM (iERP6)

18 That french thing was cruel.

Posted by: IS Roth at June 01, 2026 10:03 PM (jOiUM)

19 [redacted because San Franpsycho ruined a good joke!][CBD]
=====

And then the murders began.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 01, 2026 10:04 PM (RIvkX)

20
Why would aliens submit their DNS to a human website?

Because they want to connect to the internet?

(It's an acronym joke)

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at June 01, 2026 10:04 PM (ixS3i)

21 Words just words is related to one of the other quotes

Posted by: polynikes at June 01, 2026 10:04 PM (WNOcj)

22 It was down in Louisiana, just about a mile from Tex - Arkansas ...

Posted by: Adriane the Leadbelly Critic . . . at June 01, 2026 10:04 PM (3ZUWJ)

23
...sued 23andMe last week for data security breaches.

Well, slap my ass and call me, "Sally"!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at June 01, 2026 10:05 PM (ixS3i)

24 Here's Richie Havens ...

San Francisco Bay is my favorite.

youtube.com/watch?v=uqMUlR23EWY

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 10:06 PM (M4gnG)

25
Texarkana

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at June 01, 2026 10:06 PM (ixS3i)

26 My dad said If I Had a Boat by Lyle Lovett was the stupidest song he had ever heard. I've always kind of liked it.

Posted by: huerfano at June 01, 2026 10:06 PM (VJX5o)

27 "They live in like small towns in the [Colorado] Rockies..."

I've long been suspicious of many of the new "citizens" moving here...🤔

Good evening all!

Posted by: COMountainMarie at June 01, 2026 10:07 PM (uTEOj)

28 "Go to Hell." Start Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country

https://youtu.be/fg58_DDLvhw?t=60

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at June 01, 2026 10:07 PM (qx7Zg)

29
It's just a flesh wound

Most anything with Ron Jeremy ...

just sayin'

Posted by: Adriane the Leadbelly Critic . . . at June 01, 2026 10:07 PM (3ZUWJ)

30 Alright, we'll call it a draw.

Posted by: The Black Knight at June 01, 2026 10:07 PM (/HDaX)

31 I want my 2 dollars !!

Posted by: polynikes at June 01, 2026 10:07 PM (WNOcj)

32 Richie Havens sounds like JJ is singing.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 01, 2026 10:08 PM (RIvkX)

33 "Man, it's a real shame when folks be throwin' away a perfectly good white boy like that."

Posted by: JohnFNotKerry at June 01, 2026 10:09 PM (g14+z)

34 THIS. IS. ~~SPARTA!~~ THE ONT!

(Fixed for accuracy)

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 01, 2026 10:09 PM (gnNyN)

35

Ain't gonna make a cotton picker outta me

https://youtu.be/K0GB3CnULEg

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at June 01, 2026 10:09 PM (Cqx++)

36 a backdoor way of accessing 23andMe and Ancestry — uber-popular sites that break down users’ family trees — to screen users for a specific “genetic variance” linked to nonhuman beings.
=
Any undercover alien wouldn't be using 23 & Me, unless it was trolling us.

Posted by: Methos at June 01, 2026 10:09 PM (vSvIl)

37 Evenin'

Posted by: Puddleglum, Greetings from Amish Country at June 01, 2026 10:09 PM (bfy6w)

38 Glen needs to learn about Google translate.

Posted by: Heroq at June 01, 2026 10:10 PM (Tpp9k)

39 Evenin'
Posted by: Puddleglum, Greetings from Amish Country

Well, how-dee-do ...

Posted by: Adriane the Leadbelly Critic . . . at June 01, 2026 10:11 PM (3ZUWJ)

40 Luther Campbell?

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent at June 01, 2026 10:11 PM (/HDaX)

41 > Whistleblower claims CIA used DNA data from Ancestry and 23andMe customers in search for aliens
---------------
State of California sued 23andMe last week for data security breaches.
========
We already know California is full of aliens.... what's the big deal?

Posted by: Martini Farmer at June 01, 2026 10:11 PM (jehhT)

42 >>Here's Richie Havens playing

My ex's sister was a friend of Richies.

We're going to have a conversation someday about your music taste. Right after we discuss why you blow off oyster festivals while pretending English cooking is good.

Posted by: JackStraw at June 01, 2026 10:11 PM (viF8m)

43 Tina, you fat lard, come get some dinner.

Tina, eat the food.

-Napoleon Dynamite.

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 01, 2026 10:11 PM (TbUYH)

44 That alien story is the TV show Resident Alien. Also takes place in a small Colorado town.

Posted by: Heroq at June 01, 2026 10:12 PM (Tpp9k)

45 Wow...I am a CCR fan, but not familiar with that tune...so thanks!

Posted by: The Grateful at June 01, 2026 10:12 PM (wR7HR)

46 I was on a plane once with a bunch of very tall, very blonde people who spoke a language that sounded odd to my American ears. They were definitely aliens. They'd been to Lake Powell on vacation, from Sweden, I think.

Posted by: huerfano at June 01, 2026 10:12 PM (VJX5o)

47 We're supposed to supply quotes?

And somebody ought to belt you in the mouth. But I won't. I won't. The hell I won't.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at June 01, 2026 10:12 PM (1Ff7Z)

48 Just then a gust of wind came through and blew the note out the window, and it was never to be seen again.

Well obviously - the note said "the carrier of this letter is a suspected Bonapartist!" So no self respecting Frenchman would have anything to do with him.

The regular Frenchmen don't like him either.

Posted by: Adriane the Count of Monte Cristo Critic . . . at June 01, 2026 10:13 PM (3ZUWJ)

49 Language Lessons. Inspiring words from a man who knows how to ski.

Posted by: Fritz (not Fritz) at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (ohyUf)

50 That's a Norm McDonald joke, isn't it?

Evening, Horde.

Posted by: RandomDave at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (aJQbY)

51 Jorjani claimed that he was alerted to this bug-hunting initiative by army veteran Lyn Buchanan, who claims he was a “psychic spy” with the CIA’s remote viewing program — which investigated whether individuals could use extrasensory perception to conduct recon on distant objects, events or people.
Jorjani. 3

***

Sweet Jesus Lord!
Will we never be rid of all that remote viewing bullsh*t? I knew many of the players back in the day. A complete crock of crap.

Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (2WIwB)

52 The French Note could have been better.

Needed about another 6 or 7 paragraphs . . . . . .

Posted by: LRob in OK at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (Jr+re)

53 It WAS somewhat naive of Cameron to predict that Skynet would become selfaware on Windows 95 and Pentium servers.

Posted by: gKWVE 1997 at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (gKWVE)

54 Thanks for the ONT.

Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (zZu0s)

55 Well, this is some bullshit!

Posted by: Harry Vanderspeigle at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (/HDaX)

56 ====
State of California sued 23andMe last week for data security breaches.
Posted by: San Franpsycho
---

PO'd they didn't get the information first?

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 10:15 PM (M4gnG)

57 The French Note could have been better.

Needed about another 6 or 7 paragraphs . . . . . .
Posted by: LRob in OK at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (Jr+re)

It was a mistake.

Posted by: Buddy at June 01, 2026 10:15 PM (1Ff7Z)

58 CCR bringing it!
Great selection.

Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 10:16 PM (2WIwB)

59 I love how AI is going to be Terminator and it’s all one giant scam that is about to crash and burn.

Posted by: Heroq at June 01, 2026 10:16 PM (Tpp9k)

60 "I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate."

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 01, 2026 10:16 PM (gnNyN)

61
Brewers are beating up the Giants. Now 16-2.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 01, 2026 10:16 PM (O0L8i)

62 If you never spent time around the cotton fields in the Mississippi Delta, bring some bug spray. I've been to Rosedale. My beloved grew up nearby. Have family buried there. And living there. Didn't meet the devil, but it is a hellhole with third world poverty. If you haven't seen it, you don't know.

Still, it has a je ne sai quote
https://tinyurl.com/nbpk5kwf

Posted by: BarelyScaryMary at June 01, 2026 10:16 PM (icdz0)

63 Seen online...

Three men are on the run after raiding a fancy dress shop that specialises in 80's pop groups.

The owners are hoping that they'll turn themselves into The Police.

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at June 01, 2026 10:16 PM (qx7Zg)

64 In my younger days, I would have been concerned with the Adam Smith quote. Not now. The side chosen, either vice or virtue, seems to result in lying or at least dimming of true purpose.

Posted by: LRob in OK at June 01, 2026 10:16 PM (Jr+re)

65 Will we never be rid of all that remote viewing bullsh*t? I knew many of the players back in the day. A complete crock of crap.
Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (2WIwB)
====

It's very 70s culty EST TM TV movie.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 01, 2026 10:16 PM (RIvkX)

66 It was a mistake.
Posted by: Buddy

*** POW ***

Posted by: Mangy Cowboy at June 01, 2026 10:17 PM (3ZUWJ)

67 The Far Side comic is interesting though. Also ahead of its time. The guy could be using a rationed cellphone in the Starlink era.
He's still fucked.

Posted by: gKWVE 1997 at June 01, 2026 10:17 PM (gKWVE)

68
King Cotton

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 10:17 PM (M4gnG)

69 The French Note could have been better.

Needed about another 6 or 7 paragraphs . . . . . .
Posted by: LRob in OK at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (Jr+re)

Still.
That's four minutes of my life I'm not getting back.

Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 10:18 PM (2WIwB)

70 Thanks for the ONT, CBD!

That joke about the trip to France was great! Surely novels will be written about what the note said...

Posted by: Legally Sufficient at June 01, 2026 10:18 PM (D/6p1)

71 The Far Side comic is interesting though. Also ahead of its time. The guy could be using a rationed cellphone in the Starlink era.
He's still fucked.
Posted by: gKWVE 1997 at June 01, 2026 10:17 PM (gKWVE)
-----
His life raft is made of Chinesium.

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 01, 2026 10:18 PM (gnNyN)

72
"I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate."

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel

"No, not that one -- the gay one."

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at June 01, 2026 10:18 PM (ixS3i)

73 Glen needs to learn about Google translate.
Posted by: Heroq at June 01, 2026 10:10 PM (Tpp9k)

Or a French-English Dictionary.

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at June 01, 2026 10:18 PM (qx7Zg)

74 It was a mistake.
Posted by: Buddy

*** POW ***
Posted by: Mangy Cowboy at June 01, 2026 10:17 PM (3ZUWJ)

He hit Buddy! Come on girls!

Posted by: Faggots at June 01, 2026 10:18 PM (1Ff7Z)

75 Mets in town this week.

Beautiful evening for baseball.

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 01, 2026 10:18 PM (TbUYH)

76 I'm just bolled over by the top pic.
Posted by: OrangeEnt at June 01, 2026 10:00 PM (1Ff7Z)
* * * *
*SNORT*

Posted by: Legally Sufficient at June 01, 2026 10:18 PM (D/6p1)

77 That's bullshit. You're a white suburban punk just like me.

Posted by: 2009Refugee at June 01, 2026 10:19 PM (gpQ8/)

78 Thanks for the ONT, CBD!

Posted by: LRob in OK at June 01, 2026 10:19 PM (Jr+re)

79 Win ahh wuzz a little bitty baby
Mah mamma would a-rock me in da cradle
In them old cotton fields back home

*Thangya verra much*

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at June 01, 2026 10:20 PM (u/oMr)

80 Liberty does not exist in the absence of morality.
-- Edmund Burke

Or the absence of responsibility.

Posted by: GWB at June 01, 2026 10:20 PM (kU0PQ)

81 "It's good to be the King."

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 01, 2026 10:21 PM (gnNyN)

82 60 "I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate."
Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 01, 2026 10:16 PM (gnNyN)

"I knew it! I'm surrounded by Assholes!"

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at June 01, 2026 10:21 PM (qx7Zg)

83 65 Will we never be rid of all that remote viewing bullsh*t? I knew many of the players back in the day. A complete crock of crap.
Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (2WIwB)
====

Paging, doctor Richard Alpert PhD. Richard Alpert to the red phone we have an emergency situation @ station PNW.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 10:21 PM (M4gnG)

84 My dad said If I Had a Boat by Lyle Lovett was the stupidest song he had ever heard. I've always kind of liked it.

Posted by: huerfano at June 01, 2026 10:06 PM (VJX5o)

I always liked Bears. That was a cool song.

https://tinyurl.com/ufk59d9j

Posted by: BarelyScaryMary at June 01, 2026 10:21 PM (icdz0)

85 That french thing was cruel.
Posted by: IS Roth at June 01, 2026 10:03 PM (jOiUM)
====

The ending could have been worse, with the note being consumed by a shaggy dog.

Posted by: mrp at June 01, 2026 10:22 PM (rj6Yv)

86 It's very 70s culty EST TM TV movie.
Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 01, 2026 10:16 PM (RIvkX)

Along with the "psychic" spoon-bending crap from a certain brigadier general I knew back then. It was hard enough being an army intelligence officer back then tracking Russians without having to live down that hocus-pocus horseshit.

Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 10:23 PM (2WIwB)

87 Favorite movie line will always be delivered by the Duke:

"I'm not gonna hit ya. I'm not gonna hit ya. The hell I'm not." *WHACK*

=McLintock!

Posted by: Orson at June 01, 2026 10:23 PM (dIske)

88
Unfortunately, shaggy-dog stories sorely try my patience. Especially since there's no payoff.

Posted by: Hadrian the Seventh at June 01, 2026 10:23 PM (O0L8i)

89 If I had a boat
I'd listen to Yacht Music

Posted by: wth at June 01, 2026 10:23 PM (oq9dX)

90 King Biscuit Flower Hour > King Cotton

Posted by: Martini Farmer at June 01, 2026 10:23 PM (jehhT)

91 "Hey, do you know the way to Shell Beach?"

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 01, 2026 10:23 PM (gnNyN)

92 89 If I had a boat
I'd listen to Yacht Music

---------

Trust me, it's a burden.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at June 01, 2026 10:24 PM (u/oMr)

93 CCR has always been in my top three bands.
One of the best things to come out of California.

Posted by: Case at June 01, 2026 10:24 PM (8XBuM)

94
Ed Dames, "remote viewer" of Art Bell fame, died recently, I remember. March, I think.

Posted by: publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb) at June 01, 2026 10:24 PM (w6EFb)

95 Along with the "psychic" spoon-bending crap from a certain brigadier general I knew back then. It was hard enough being an army intelligence officer back then tracking Russians without having to live down that hocus-pocus horseshit.
Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 10:23 PM (2WIwB)
=====

Aaaahh Uri Geller?

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 01, 2026 10:24 PM (RIvkX)

96 No, thats just what they'll be expecting us to do.'

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:24 PM (zZu0s)

97 Yesterday I discovered that one of my plum trees broke a branch because it had too many green plums on it. There is not much use for unripe plums, so I decided to pick them off the branch and turn them into "olives"
The first step is to soak them in brine for a week, then rinse and soak in brine for two months, and then pickle them in a vinegar pickle for a couple of days.
You have the choice of keeping them in olive oil after that, or leave them in the pickle.

Posted by: Kindltot at June 01, 2026 10:24 PM (rbvCR)

98 Now we know where ABBA really came from.

Posted by: davidt at June 01, 2026 10:25 PM (Q+gd/)

99 "You remind me of the babe. What babe? Babe with the power. What power? The power of voodoo."

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 01, 2026 10:26 PM (gnNyN)

100 >>Wow...I am a CCR fan, but not familiar with that tune...so thanks!

I used to travel constantly for work. I always played this before I left. Good luck charm.

https://tinyurl.com/bdzdtkvs

Posted by: JackStraw at June 01, 2026 10:26 PM (viF8m)

101 Hopper didnt disappear- he was skinned alive!

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:27 PM (zZu0s)

102 “Madness!”

From Bridge on that river I can’t spell

Posted by: Javems at June 01, 2026 10:27 PM (zFsEm)

103 Kwai?

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:27 PM (zZu0s)

104
Kwai

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at June 01, 2026 10:28 PM (ixS3i)

105 >>>The French Note

That's the kind of story that makes me want to punch the author.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at June 01, 2026 10:28 PM (syz1S)

106 Elvis is not dead- he just went home.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:28 PM (zZu0s)

107 It is far better to be alone, then to be in bad company.

---------

And being in Bad Company is far better than being in Mott the Hoople.

Posted by: Mick Ralphs at June 01, 2026 10:29 PM (u/oMr)

108 Hello, Horde! I posted this downstairs, but I am reposting it here:

In medical news, I had my CT Scan this morning, then saw the oncology surgeon this afternoon.

Everything looks good/stable - no new tumors, and the ones that are there have pretty much stayed the same or shrunk ever so slightly (so much so that it could just be user interpretation). No metastises seen, so that is good, too.

Apparently I CAN stay on this protocol more than 6 months at a time, so we are going to continue to do fills with the medication, alternating with "placebo" fills every other 2 weeks as before.

I will say that the doctor seemed QUITE pleased with my progress; I am not sure that when he first saw me 20 months ago that he thought that I would still be kickin' it all these months later. I have apparently responded EXTREMELY well to these protocols. Honestly, it's just luck of the draw - many others have been on these same meds and not had good results.

Those prayers are working, folks! We are extremely grateful for each and every one of them.

So good news all around! 😊♥️

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, Texas, AoSHQ's Plucky Wee One - Eat the Cheesecake, Buy the Yarn. at June 01, 2026 10:29 PM (SRRAx)

109 You see we started a game we never got to finish 'play for blood'? And this time, it's legal.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:29 PM (zZu0s)

110 That's Right, You're Not From Texas

youtu.be/fLU_IYflUkQ&t=30

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 10:29 PM (M4gnG)

111 Favorite movie line will always be delivered by the Duke:
"I'm not gonna hit ya. I'm not gonna hit ya.

"I guess you think I'm kickin' ya, Bob..."

Posted by: gKWVE 1991 at June 01, 2026 10:29 PM (gKWVE)

112 You can't dust for vomit.

Posted by: Count de Monet at June 01, 2026 10:30 PM (wVcYX)

113 CCR has always been in my top three bands.
One of the best things to come out of California.
Posted by: Case
......

I always thought they were born on the bayou.

Posted by: wth at June 01, 2026 10:30 PM (oq9dX)

114 Paging, doctor Richard Alpert PhD. Richard Alpert to the red phone we have an emergency situation @ station PNW.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 10:21 PM (M4gnG)

***

Him and that cocksucker Leary. Had an excellent troop in my platoon in Germany. Got a call one night. The kid wigged out. Sat straight up in bed and was gonzo. Had to medivac him back to the states. His buddy in high school years before had slipped him some LSD. He was fine for years then wham! Flashback.

Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 10:30 PM (2WIwB)

115 "HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO SUCK MY BALLS, MR. GARRISON?"

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 01, 2026 10:30 PM (gnNyN)

116 I suppose I should have mentioned to him that for whatever reason my body has always demonstrated an incredible will to live.

There has been more than one occasion when I should not have survived, but I was always blissfully unaware until long after the fact that I shouldn't have walked out of the hospital.

I know the odds with this beast, but I think that I just want to stick around and keep the Bucket List Party going 😂😂😂 (Paul has clipped my wings a bit on that, but there aren't any blowout trips planned in the foreseeable future - just a couple of local concerts and shows where we won't be flying or staying in hotels)

Can't blow through the kids' inheritance if I'm not here to spend the money, amiright? 🥳🥳🥳

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, Texas, AoSHQ's Plucky Wee One - Eat the Cheesecake, Buy the Yarn. at June 01, 2026 10:30 PM (SRRAx)

117 I thought it was common knowledge that the ten lost tribes were aliens and that DNA tests were superfluous.

Posted by: Rev. Wishbone at June 01, 2026 10:30 PM (D1E+2)

118 I always thought they were born on the bayou.
Posted by: wth at June 01, 2026 10:30 PM (oq9dX)

--------

Nope. Berkeley-based.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at June 01, 2026 10:31 PM (u/oMr)

119 Aaaahh Uri Geller?
Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 01, 2026 10:24 PM (RIvkX)

Stubblebine.

Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 10:32 PM (2WIwB)

120
Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, Texas, AoSHQ's Plucky Wee One - Eat the Cheesecake, Buy the Yarn. at June 01, 2026 10:29 PM (SRRAx)
====
b"h for good health.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 01, 2026 10:32 PM (RIvkX)

121 Hello. Thanks for a nice ONT smorgasbord, CBD
Haaalllp. I watched a 'strange, dark, and mysterious' video on YuteOob, then another, and my sidebar of suggestions is overflowing with them. And by strange dark and mysterious, I mostly mean artificial slop, bogus, and inconclusive.

The only 'real' one was "Remains of missing Taos woman Melissa Casias found in Carson National Forest."

Admiral Byrd Aired One TV Interview in 1954
What He Said About the Old World on Camera

The Bells They Keep Finding in Coal Seams —
Every One Is Made of the Same Alloy That Shouldn't Exist

Mysterious Things Captured by Airport Security Cameras

and so on.

It's aliens. Nordics, naturally.

Posted by: mindful webworker - Rudy and Mae - what a team-up at June 01, 2026 10:33 PM (kU8xu)

122 'A man's got to know his limitations'.

Since Clint Eastwood came up earlier.

Posted by: Puddleglum, Greetings from Amish Country at June 01, 2026 10:33 PM (bfy6w)

123 God Bless you, Teresa! May you have many fun bucket list adventures ahead. ❤️

Posted by: BarelyScaryMary at June 01, 2026 10:33 PM (icdz0)

124 Those prayers are working, folks! We are extremely grateful for each and every one of them.

So good news all around! 😊♥️
Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, Texas,
----

👍

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 10:34 PM (M4gnG)

125 Oh, How ordinawy

Posted by: Bilwis Devourer of Innocent Souls, I'm starvin' over here at June 01, 2026 10:34 PM (w/O5Q)

126 So that's what a Berkeley accent sounds like.

Posted by: wth at June 01, 2026 10:35 PM (oq9dX)

127
It's aliens. Nordics, naturally.

Posted by: mindful webworker - Rudy and Mae - what a team-up

Filthy Scandis

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at June 01, 2026 10:36 PM (ixS3i)

128
“Madness!”

From Bridge on that river I can’t spell
Posted by: Javems

With or without parachute?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at June 01, 2026 10:36 PM (Cqx++)

129 > Can't blow through the kids' inheritance if I'm not here to spend the money, amiright? 🥳🥳🥳
Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, Texas, AoSHQ's Plucky Wee One - Eat the Cheesecake, Buy the Yarn.
-------
My reason for living. 😉

Posted by: Martini Farmer at June 01, 2026 10:36 PM (jehhT)

130 Uri Gellar was part of Stargate, for a while.

Posted by: Kindltot at June 01, 2026 10:37 PM (rbvCR)

131 I think Ancient Aliens had an episode or two on how aliens would come to Earth to bang some Terrans.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at June 01, 2026 10:37 PM (/lPRQ)

132 CCR did a lot of great covers.

Posted by: Don Black at June 01, 2026 10:37 PM (ZxPkt)

133 That pointless story about the French note was already ancient when I heard it in high school in the 1950s. The oldest known version is an 1896 story "The Mysterious Card" by Cleveland Moffett which can be read e.g. at Project Gutenberg or Wikisource. (Moffett wrote a sequel, "The Mysterious Card Unveiled", which purports to explain it.) A later (1937) story with the same theme is "The Most Maddening Story in the World" by Ralph Straus, which can be read at Project Gutenberg Australia. I don't know if I can post links here but these stories are discussed and links provided at scifi.stackexchange.com in answer to question 95027, "Short Story: Man has a Letter he can't read and nobody will translate it for him".

Posted by: bof at June 01, 2026 10:38 PM (wQY1T)

134 @NEWSMAX
·
3h
A federal judge on Monday ordered the National Park Service to allow a liberal advocacy group to display an "86-47" flag near the National Mall, ruling that the message is protected political speech and does not constitute a threat against President Donald Trump.

Posted by: Don Black at June 01, 2026 10:38 PM (ZxPkt)

135 Haven't thought of Lyle Lovett in forever as I did not like to look at him. Maybe his music is good as I won't know. I did remember his brief marriage to big mouth Julia Roberts, which grossed me out at the time.

Then I remembered Renee Zelweger and Kenny Chesney's even briefer marriage. I didn't listen to him, either, because I also didn't like looking at him. He may have some good music as well.

I have always wondered for a nanosecond per decade about these couples.

These are my thoughts for June 1st.

I am glad the Colorado aliens are blonde with blue eyes vs Somolian.

I almost feel normal again after family virus/trip/exhaustion and vast irritation that I missed most of May.

I remain irritated by the weird spring and my roses being as confused as I am about my world. I am unsure what this is going to mean for the rest of the year, but it's a sign.

Thanks for the ONT and my source in this blog for normal people.

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at June 01, 2026 10:38 PM (WONhk)

136 Right after we discuss why you blow off oyster festivals while pretending English cooking is good.

Posted by: JackStraw at June 01, 2026 10:11 PM (viF8m)

Circumstances my dear boy... circumstances!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 01, 2026 10:39 PM (iERP6)

137 Do you like movies about Gladiators?

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 10:39 PM (/+uur)

138 TiFW,

You rock on, girl! So glad the prayers are helping and please know they will continue!

Posted by: Legally Sufficient at June 01, 2026 10:39 PM (D/6p1)

139 I said I would kill you last...

You did. You did.

I lied.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:39 PM (zZu0s)

140 >>> 127
It's aliens. Nordics, naturally.

Posted by: mindful webworker - Rudy and Mae - what a team-up

Filthy Scandis
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at June 01, 2026 10:36 PM (ixS3i)

Icebacks!

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at June 01, 2026 10:39 PM (R+iUD)

141 Aliens want to bang Texans?
Well that should be interesting.

Posted by: wth at June 01, 2026 10:40 PM (oq9dX)

142 >>>slipped him some LSD. He was fine for years then wham! Flashback.
Posted by: Diogenes
---

They are redoing research using it for resolving PTSD and homosexuality illusions.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 10:40 PM (M4gnG)

143 I didnt kill my wife!

I don't care!

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:40 PM (zZu0s)

144 130 Uri Gellar was part of Stargate, for a while.
Posted by: Kindltot at June 01, 2026 10:37 PM (rbvCR)

Project Stargate. You had me worried Gellar was part of the SG-1 series.

Posted by: gKWVE 1998 at June 01, 2026 10:40 PM (gKWVE)

145 141 Aliens want to bang Texans?
Well that should be interesting.

---------

Come for the Devils Tower made out of mashed potatoes

Stay for the anal probing

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at June 01, 2026 10:41 PM (u/oMr)

146 CCR did a lot of great covers.
Posted by: Don Black

But CRC solved a lot more homework ...

Posted by: Adriane the Monday Critic on Monday . . . at June 01, 2026 10:41 PM (3ZUWJ)

147 You see, Madam, how i make everything new?

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:41 PM (zZu0s)

148 141 Aliens want to bang Texans?
Well that should be interesting.
Posted by: wth at June 01, 2026 10:40 PM (oq9dX)

Hank
I got 2 greys and a lizard.

Posted by: Wilbur T Texan at June 01, 2026 10:41 PM (/+uur)

149 The French Note - Should have known. A tale with that much winding build-up could only be a shaggy dog tale.

Strange, dark, an mysterious.

Posted by: mindful webworker - it was the handwriting at June 01, 2026 10:41 PM (kU8xu)

150 > Can't blow through the kids' inheritance if I'm not here to spend the money, amiright? 🥳🥳🥳
Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, Texas, AoSHQ's Plucky Wee One - Eat the Cheesecake, Buy the Yarn

---

As an only daughter of people with an inheritance they can blow through. I've always lived frugally. To their embarrassment at times.
But I would rather have my folks than their money.

Posted by: BarelyScaryMary at June 01, 2026 10:42 PM (icdz0)

151
That quote is a memorable moment from the classic sci-fi action film Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior (1981).
It happens during the scene where the refinery community's leader, Pappagallo, is trying to convince his people to make a dangerous break for the coast using the fuel tanker. A cynical member of the community named Big Rebecca shuts down his inspirational speech by telling him:
"Words, just words. You're going to die for a pipe-dream."
Immediately after she says it, the Warrior Woman speaks up to defend the plan, and Max (Mel Gibson) quietly starts prepping his shotgun, showing he's ready to drive the rig.

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 10:42 PM (QVmho)

152 Teresa,
Great news! So happy to hear that you are stable and sticking around! You are an inspiration!!
Tell Paul not to be such a party pooper. What else is on your bucket list? Remember, no regerts!!!

Posted by: lin-duh is offended at June 01, 2026 10:42 PM (VCgbV)

153 And Paul should really hope the aliens who find us aren't horny, because he stands to be rejected not just by every woman on Earth but also in a 30-light-year radius.

Posted by: gKWVE at June 01, 2026 10:43 PM (gKWVE)

154 The establishment really really hates Trump

this judge is trying to hamstring the case against Comey

Posted by: Don Black at June 01, 2026 10:43 PM (ZxPkt)

155 Zed's dead, baby.

Posted by: wth at June 01, 2026 10:43 PM (oq9dX)

156 >>> 149 The French Note - Should have known. A tale with that much winding build-up could only be a shaggy dog tale.

Strange, dark, an mysterious.
Posted by: mindful webworker - it was the handwriting at June 01, 2026 10:41 PM (kU8xu)

Not always.

Posted by: stayed lions at June 01, 2026 10:43 PM (R+iUD)

157 Teresa, you are amazing. Keep firing on all cylinders, sweet lady.

We saw Seinfeld over a decade ago and worth the money. He was funny and a clean show.

So glad you are kickin' that bucket list!

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at June 01, 2026 10:43 PM (WONhk)

158 ...uh, I mean the troll Paul (or Sid), not this other Paul

Posted by: gKWVE cursing the timing at June 01, 2026 10:43 PM (gKWVE)

159 They ought to give me Wurlitzer prize

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 10:43 PM (/+uur)

160 slipped him some LSD. He was fine for years then wham! Flashback.
Posted by: Diogenes
---

They are redoing research using it for resolving PTSD and homosexuality illusions.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 10:40 PM (M4gnG)

***

What's old is new again. Sure, ptsd research gives it an acceptable cover. I wonder how many kids they'll fuck up this time?

Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 10:44 PM (2WIwB)

161
“Madness!”

From Bridge on that river I can’t spell
Posted by: Javems

How could the same senior British officer be imprisoned simultaneously in Thailand and Germany? ("The Bridge Over the River Kwai" and "The Great Escape". respectively.)

Something tells me that those were not WWII documentary films after all.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at June 01, 2026 10:44 PM (ixS3i)

162 50 That's a Norm McDonald joke, isn't it?

Evening, Horde.
Posted by: RandomDave at June 01, 2026 10:14 PM (aJQbY)

My favorite:

A frog goes into a bank to get a loan.
https://youtu.be/kKvOjjZ4EaA

Posted by: SciVo at June 01, 2026 10:45 PM (Sy6m/)

163 Buttercup was born on a small farm in the country of Florin. Isn't that a wonderful beginning?

Yeah, it's really good.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:46 PM (zZu0s)

164 "There ain't no iguanas."

Posted by: davidt at June 01, 2026 10:46 PM (Q+gd/)

165 >> two on how aliens would come to Earth to bang some Terrans.

That's a big part of a lot of that lore. There's a bunch of different strains of that lore. But the classic Sitchin Anunnaki version has of course, the Anunnaki creating humans by genetic engineering. And they were a bunch of horn dogs (The "sons of God" and "daughters of men"). Also, the female Anunnaki dug the human Paolos big time, too.

And the Nordic/Tall-White (Pleiades/Lyra) females are basically some sci-fi horny nerd type of fantasy. Think Natasha Henstridge or Syndey Sweeny playing tall hot she-aliens.

Posted by: publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb) at June 01, 2026 10:46 PM (w6EFb)

166 The French Note
CBD is as cruel as ace

Posted by: vmom deport deport deport at June 01, 2026 10:46 PM (6U1c2)

167 People in the South embraced CCR as our own, still do.
You may hear them at any time come blasting over the radio.
I heard "It Came Out Of The Sky" just the other day. Love that song, it's funny.

Posted by: Case at June 01, 2026 10:46 PM (8XBuM)

168 Kwai sounds right. On my phone so I can’ credit

Posted by: Javems at June 01, 2026 10:46 PM (zFsEm)

169 Come for the Devils Tower made out of mashed potatoes

Stay for the anal probing
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at June 01, 2026 10:41 PM (u/oMr)
===

Say what now?

Posted by: Richard Dreyfus at June 01, 2026 10:46 PM (RIvkX)

170 Napoleon Dunamite>>>>>Mystic Pizza.

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 01, 2026 10:46 PM (A5RD0)

171
But CRC solved a lot more homework ...

Posted by: Adriane the Monday Critic

There's a call back to the fusty and musty past!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at June 01, 2026 10:46 PM (ixS3i)

172 @43. "I caught you a delicious bass"

"Do the chickens have large talons?"

"Don't be mad cuz I've been chatting with babes online all day"

"Bow to your Sensai... BOW TO YOUR SENSAI!"

Posted by: Matthew Kant Cipher at June 01, 2026 10:47 PM (kOluj)

173
Forgot to sock Wesley Crusher.

Dangit.

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 10:47 PM (QVmho)

174 How about a nice game of chess?

Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 10:47 PM (2WIwB)

175 Well, the start was wonderfully lyrical and true.

By the end I didn't know what to think.

So, this ONT fits right in with the rest of my life right now.

Kudos, I suppose.

Posted by: jocon307 at June 01, 2026 10:48 PM (EuROc)

176 Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 10:42 PM (QVmho)

Ah...a scholar of great movies!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 01, 2026 10:49 PM (iERP6)

177 "I don't want to be a pie! I don't like gravy."

Posted by: "Perfessor" Squirrel at June 01, 2026 10:50 PM (gnNyN)

178 The establishment really really hates Trump

this judge is trying to hamstring the case against Comey
Posted by: Don Black

Wonder what the judge would think if somebody put "86 Da Judge" on his house?

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at June 01, 2026 10:50 PM (/lPRQ)

179 One man one boat!

Posted by: Elbridge Gerry at June 01, 2026 10:50 PM (rgnea)

180 Her favorite pasttimes were riding her horse and tormenting the farm boy who worked there. His name was Wesley- but she never called him that.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:51 PM (zZu0s)

181 I think Ancient Aliens had an episode or two on how aliens would come to Earth to bang some Terrans.

Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at June 01, 2026 10:37 PM (/lPRQ)

If their females look like Seven of Nine I'll leave the light on for them.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 01, 2026 10:51 PM (snZF9)

182 I need to find the bar of soap in the London hotel story...

So old I read it on a usernet ...

Posted by: Adriane the Monday Critic on Monday . . . at June 01, 2026 10:51 PM (3ZUWJ)

183
And you lot let TJM troll you...
Pigman: "Gene Hackman and Michael Caine in the same movie. A Bridge Too Far. With this, my thesis is complete. I can now turn off the TV... and go to sleep."
Gutter: "Man, you've been in those pajamas for three semesters."
Pigman: "That's okay. I'm going to sleep for four."

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 10:51 PM (QVmho)

184 >> If their females look like Seven of Nine I'll leave the light on for them.

That's what the female Nordics are supposed to look like, of course. And quite tall.

Posted by: publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb) at June 01, 2026 10:52 PM (w6EFb)

185 I was driving the spawn to the range this afternoon and while we were driving I notice some movement near the bottom of my dash... there was a small garter snake under my hood and it decided to peep out and see what was going on. I pulled over when I could and popped my hood to find the little guy but I couldn't find it. I hope he found a good place to drop to the ground and he's ok.

Posted by: lin-duh is offended at June 01, 2026 10:52 PM (VCgbV)

186 Straits cover of Middle Age Crazy is damn nice

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 10:52 PM (/+uur)

187 One man takes the rifle. The other waits. When the man with the rifle is killed, the other man picks up the rifle.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:52 PM (zZu0s)

188 Can’t see either

Posted by: Javems at June 01, 2026 10:54 PM (zFsEm)

189 Non!

Posted by: OrangeEnt at June 01, 2026 10:54 PM (1Ff7Z)

190 Mah mamma would a-rock me in da cradle
In them old cotton fields back home

*Thangya verra much*
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at June 01, 2026 10:20 PM (u/oMr)
*******************
Dat should be "dem" old cotton fields
*Resident Redneck and Ebonics Translator

I found a little tiny spiral bound notebook from 4th grade that I think should be published in all the weirdness of my then mindset.

It has pages of "foreign" auto plates invading our neighborhood. A brief spy week or two with my brother.

A mention of a birthday party and I was NOT inviting Carol Ross (whoever she was and unsure what she did to me).

Plus drawings of various Barbie type women with bullet boobies. One of a RN in a cap holding a baby (I was a newborn nurse decades later but did not wear my cap with scrubs...a foretelling).

The entire lyrics of My Old Kentucky Home appear for reasons unknown. That made me laugh as well.

I am saving it for my sons to find after I blast off to heaven someday. I was one weird little girl and one of my granddaughters may be a lot like me in spirit and looks, which should scare people.

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at June 01, 2026 10:54 PM (WONhk)

191 >> If their females look like Seven of Nine I'll leave the light on for them.

That's what the female Nordics are supposed to look like, of course. And quite tall.

Posted by: publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb) at June 01, 2026 10:52 PM (w6EFb)

My electric bill is going to take a hit. lol

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 01, 2026 10:54 PM (snZF9)

192
Marcia Lucas, the woman who saved "Star Wars", passed away on May 27.

I bet ol' George still feels a sting that she earned an Oscar for her work on that film and he did not.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM) Imprison! Imprison! Imprison! at June 01, 2026 10:55 PM (ixS3i)

193
One man takes the rifle. The other waits. When the man with the rifle is killed, the other man picks up the rifle.
Posted by: Aetius451AD

Enemy at the gates. Shouted through a megaphone by a Soviet zampolit who is distributing weapons to the troops

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 10:56 PM (QVmho)

194 Bilbo Baggins! Do not think me a conjurer of cheap tricks! I am not trying to rob you!

I'm trying to help you.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 10:57 PM (zZu0s)

195 I took Kyle B death quite hard.

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 10:57 PM (/+uur)

196 I couldn't find it. I hope he found a good place to drop to the ground and he's ok.
Posted by: lin-duh is offended at June 01, 2026 10:52 PM (VCgbV)

*************************
Very nice of you.

I would have screamed, possibly wrecked the car, or if I lived would make sure I ran over it several times.

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at June 01, 2026 10:57 PM (WONhk)

197 I think Ancient Aliens had an episode or two on how aliens would come to Earth to bang some Terrans.
Posted by: Itinerant Alley Butcher at June 01, 2026 10:37 PM (/lPRQ)

"Earth Girls Are Easy"

Posted by: Idaho Spudboy at June 01, 2026 10:57 PM (UNIfT)

198 ChristyBlinkyTheGreat,
lol! 😂

Posted by: lin-duh is offended at June 01, 2026 10:58 PM (VCgbV)

199 "Most people get off the train at regularly scheduled stops. That's why they're called 'Stops'. They don't throw themselves from the train." - Charles Grodin, Midnight Run

Posted by: Norrin Radd, sojourner of the spaceways at June 01, 2026 11:00 PM (tRYqg)

200 Very nice of you.

I would have screamed, possibly wrecked the car, or if I lived would make sure I ran over it several times.

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at June 01, 2026 10:57 PM (WONhk)

They had guns in the car. I would have shot it before and after I ran it over. lol

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 01, 2026 11:00 PM (snZF9)

201 Virtue is more to be feared than vice, because its excesses are not subject to the regulation of conscience.
-- Adam Smith

CSL

“Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies.

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:00 PM (/+uur)

202 164 "There ain't no iguanas."
Posted by: davidt
---

Is it an iguana tale or an iguana tail.
What would they do?

https://tinyurl.com/247b8nnv

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 11:01 PM (M4gnG)

203 There's a bunch of different strains of that lore. But the classic Sitchin Anunnaki version has of course, the Anunnaki creating humans by genetic engineering. And they were a bunch of horn dogs (The "sons of God" and "daughters of men"). Also, the female Anunnaki dug the human Paolos big time, too.
-
I think it's worth a reminder that the Biblical take on those events is rather less positive about that interaction than most of the ancient cultures.

Posted by: Methos at June 01, 2026 11:01 PM (vSvIl)

204 "Fat drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son"

"They can't do that to our pledges.... only we can do that to our pledges"

"I gotta work on my game". "No, don't think of it as work... the whole idea is just to relax and have fun"

"Have a beer.... don't cost nothin'"

Posted by: Matthew Kant Cipher at June 01, 2026 11:01 PM (kOluj)

205
"Most people get off the train at regularly scheduled stops. That's why they're called 'Stops'. They don't throw themselves from the train." - Charles Grodin, Midnight Run
Posted by: Norrin Radd, sojourner of the spaceways

Love that movie, too bad it has thatdamned commie Diniro* in it.
*deliberate misspelling to micro agress that asshole

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:02 PM (QVmho)

206 Cop: Where would you like to go, fella?
Grover Muldoon: Well--I left my Jag in Kansas City.

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:02 PM (/+uur)

207 Muldoon

hahahahahaha

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:02 PM (/+uur)

208 It is far better to be alone, then to be in bad company.
-- George Washington

Than. Than. Than.

"Then" makes this statement much different.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, back from the road trip at June 01, 2026 11:03 PM (0aYVJ)

209 What would you say you do around here?

Laden or unladen?

Yeah, I'm going to need you to come in on Saturday...

Posted by: lin-duh is offended at June 01, 2026 11:03 PM (VCgbV)

210 >>Circumstances my dear boy... circumstances!

https://tinyurl.com/2mj97dxk

Posted by: JackStraw at June 01, 2026 11:04 PM (viF8m)

211 I haven't even told my father about the scholarship I didn't get. I'm gonna end up working in a lumberyard the rest of my life.
What's wrong with lumber? I own two lumberyards.
I notice you don't spend too much time there.
I'm not quite sure where they are.

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:04 PM (/+uur)

212 Alien and Monty Python something something Holy Grail. What would have saved beeeeelions of dollars, "What kind of a load do you use in that .44?" "Its a light Special. In this size pf a gun it gives me more control and less recoil than a .357 Magnum with wadcutters."

Posted by: Hokey Pokey at June 01, 2026 11:05 PM (YlWIZ)

213 Well obviously - the note said "the carrier of this letter is a suspected Bonapartist!"

No, see, 'cause then that would be a DUMAS joke.
And we do Dumas jokes all the time.

Posted by: Way, Way Downriver at June 01, 2026 11:05 PM (zdLoL)

214 I haven't even told my father about the scholarship I didn't get. I'm gonna end up working in a lumberyard the rest of my life.
What's wrong with lumber? I own two lumberyards.
I notice you don't spend too much time there.
I'm not quite sure where they are.

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:04 PM (/+uur)

Caddyshack was great.

Posted by: Berserker-Dragonheads Division at June 01, 2026 11:05 PM (snZF9)

215
"Fat drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son"
"They can't do that to our pledges.... only we can do that to our pledges"
"I gotta work on my game". "No, don't think of it as work... the whole idea is just to relax and have fun"
"Have a beer.... don't cost nothin'"
Posted by: Matthew Kant Cipher

Dean John Wormer (played by John Vernon)
Eric "Otter" Stratton (played by Tim Matheson)
Danny Noonan (Michael O'Keefe) and Ty Webb (Chevy Chase)
Stan (played by John Cazale)

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:05 PM (QVmho)

216 208 It is far better to be alone, then to be in bad company.
-- George Washington

Than. Than. Than.

"Then" makes this statement much different.
Posted by: Pug Mahon, back from the road trip at June 01, 2026 11:03 PM (0aYVJ)

IHOP
Breakfast Anytime

OK Ill have the French Waffles in the War of the Roses.

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:06 PM (/+uur)

217 Theresa in Fort Worth! Yea!!! Great news!! So happy to hear!

Posted by: Iris at June 01, 2026 11:06 PM (286+n)

218 "Deserves got nothing to to with it."

And perhaps someone will indulge me. I seem to recall Higgins saying to Magnum in the original series something like "Do try to keep up Magnum" I sure can't find anything like that searching the web.

Posted by: PaleRider at June 01, 2026 11:07 PM (PV+Zw)

219 Stan (played by John Cazale)
Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:05 PM (QVmho)

----------

Last one was Blutarsky (Belushi) - when they walked into the toga party

Posted by: Matthew Kant Cipher at June 01, 2026 11:07 PM (kOluj)

220 No, see, 'cause then that would be a DUMAS joke.
And we do Dumas jokes all the time.

Posted by: Way, Way Downriver

Ah well. Like father, like son ...
: -))

Posted by: Adriane the Monday Critic on Monday . . . at June 01, 2026 11:07 PM (3ZUWJ)

221
What would you say you do around here?
Laden or unladen?
Yeah, I'm going to need you to come in on Saturday...
Posted by: lin-duh is offended

Bob Slydell (played by John C. McGinley)
King Arthur (played by Graham Chapman)
Bill Lumbergh (played by Gary Cole)

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:08 PM (QVmho)

222 "Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?"

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:09 PM (/+uur)

223 I specifically asked for no salt.

Posted by: Helena Handbasket at June 01, 2026 11:09 PM (R+iUD)

224 Max (Mel Gibson) quietly starts prepping his shotgun, showing he's ready to drive the rig.
Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 10:42 PM (QVmho)
************************
I fell in love with young Mel and love that movie. Old Mel ain't so bad either, altho I don't like his beard (he didn't ask me).

He's still high on my list. By all accounts he's much fun with his female costars. I love a wicked man with blue eyes. Also my wicked blonde husband with green eyes.

Tonight he examined the remains of my cooking chicken with ligonberry sauce for his highness.I screwed up and did not saute the chicken breasts in the same pan as the veg. So I had to use two pans to brown the chicken and it left a breaded mess and I poured water in that to lessen the ordeal later of clean up.

At first he thought I'd had an episode and the 1" water was oil. He was very calm about it all, wondering briefly of disposal, and I had to laugh. I've been weird for weeks post near cholera but not THAT weird to brown chicken in an inch of oil.

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at June 01, 2026 11:09 PM (WONhk)

225 >>"Fat drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son"

One of the guys I used to race with got the nickname in college FID. He was the rep for a beer company on campus. He partied a lot. Dean of Students called him fat, ignorant and drunk, FID.

He was very thin. Good sailboat racer too.

Posted by: JackStraw at June 01, 2026 11:11 PM (viF8m)

226 Just because we're holding hands doesn't mean we'll be taking warm showers together until the wee hours of the morning.

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:11 PM (/+uur)

227
Last one was Blutarsky (Belushi) - when they walked into the toga party

Posted by: Matthew Kant Cipher

Can't be right all the time. Gotta maintain that troll-ish persona.

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:12 PM (QVmho)

228
That's what the female Nordics are supposed to look like, of course. And quite tall.
Posted by: publius

Julie Newmar

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at June 01, 2026 11:12 PM (Cqx++)

229 Confound it! The batteries are dead!

Posted by: OrangeEnt at June 01, 2026 11:13 PM (1Ff7Z)

230 is it a movie quote thread? If so, I have failed to read the room.

Posted by: Don Black at June 01, 2026 11:13 PM (ZxPkt)

231 Do you like movies about Gladiators?
You ever seen a gown man naked?

Posted by: Graham Platner at June 01, 2026 11:13 PM (/+uur)

232 Seriously late to this party…
But my favorite movie line goes something like this:
“Great! I’ve got a Trig final tomorrow, and we’re being chased by Guido the killer pimp!”
Or something along those lines. Classic, no matter what the iteration…

Posted by: Gunslinger at June 01, 2026 11:13 PM (HZfH/)

233
I vaguely remembered something (probably from Art Bell/Coast-to-Coast AM stuff) about a supposed photo of a female Nordic. And it was more, well, alien and otherwordly than the sex fantasy versions. Well, I found this example:

t.ly/p8xZf

Posted by: publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb) at June 01, 2026 11:14 PM (w6EFb)

234 From the same somewhat obscure movie:

"What's THAT for? Date night in the barrio? Daddy would've got me an Uzi."

"It's been 3 days and he hasn't made a pass at either one of us. He's either a gentleman or a fag. What are the odds?"

Posted by: mnw at June 01, 2026 11:15 PM (RCjYY)

235 So many great movies, so many great lines but only a few come to mind:

"You know how to whistle, don't you? You just put your lips together and blow" - scandalized movie audiences in the 1940's

"My mama didn't raise me to be makin no guesses in front of any yankee officers" (might be off a little)

"Shoot - feller could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all this"

Same movie and character as above:

"I been to two state fairs and a rodeo and I ain't never heard anything that crazy"

Same actor, different movie:

"Somebody go back and get us a s***load a dimes"

From the same movie frequently quoted here at AoS Hq:

"Where de white wimmin at?"

Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK's Phone) at June 01, 2026 11:16 PM (QGaXH)

236
Just because we're holding hands doesn't mean we'll be taking warm showers together until the wee hours of the morning.
Posted by: r hennigantx

Gunnery Sergeant Tom Highway (played by Clint Eastwood).

On the beer don't cost nothing.... didn't Pauli say that in Rocky?

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:16 PM (QVmho)

237 183
And you lot let TJM troll you...
Pigman: "Gene Hackman and Michael Caine in the same movie. A Bridge Too Far. With this, my thesis is complete. I can now turn off the TV... and go to sleep."
Gutter: "Man, you've been in those pajamas for three semesters."
Pigman: "That's okay. I'm going to sleep for four."
Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 10:51 PM (QVmho)

Shower Scene

Posted by: Bilwis Devourer of Innocent Souls, I'm starvin' over here at June 01, 2026 11:16 PM (w/O5Q)

238 "My mama didn't raise me to be makin no guesses in front of any yankee officers" (might be off a little)

Horse Soldiers?

Posted by: OrangeEnt at June 01, 2026 11:18 PM (1Ff7Z)

239 We have very little choice about our life. The only thing really left us is a choice about our death. And mine will be... glorious!

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:18 PM (/+uur)

240
"What's THAT for? Date night in the barrio? Daddy would've got me an Uzi."
It's been 3 days and he hasn't made a pass at either one of us. He's either a gentleman or a fag. What are the odds?"
Posted by: mnw

Night of the comets, and the fag was Janeway's #1 in one of the shitty ST spin off series. Chacote?

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:19 PM (QVmho)

241 On the beer don't cost nothing.... didn't Pauli say that in Rocky?
Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:16 PM (QVmho)

Bluto
Aminal House

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:19 PM (/+uur)

242 From a film, but I can only give you the punchline, because the setup is un-printable, even here:

"Then I'll just have a Coke."

Posted by: mnw at June 01, 2026 11:19 PM (RCjYY)

243

Shower Scene
Posted by: Bilwis Devourer of Innocent Souls

Porky's?

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:19 PM (QVmho)

244 Just one more:

"I can eat fifty eggs...."

Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK's Phone) at June 01, 2026 11:19 PM (QGaXH)

245
Throw the third switch!

Not the third switch!

Posted by: 13times at June 01, 2026 11:19 PM (cZPj9)

246 Its ok Taggert
They're just hanging a man and his horse

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:20 PM (/+uur)

247 It's 6:50 AM in Tehran, no bombing tonight, sigh.
Maybe next weekend.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 11:21 PM (M4gnG)

248
We have very little choice about our life. The only thing really left us is a choice about our death. And mine will be... glorious!
Posted by: r hennigantx

The Purifier (played by Linus Roache).

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:21 PM (QVmho)

249 Belushi was great in Animal House. I loved that movie. They were all great. I may have to watch it again this summer. Gone too soon.

Our Saturday night date was the original years of SNL with the best cast (in my opinion). We named our first puppy Gilda. We worked weekends.

I would give the 11-7 charge RN report from my shift, then we'd blast off to our house to make sure we were loaded up for the first of the show.

I LOVED THEM! Perfection!

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at June 01, 2026 11:22 PM (WONhk)

250 Norm McDonald shaggy dog jokes are better. Or worse, depending on how you look at that kind of thing.

Posted by: Tom Servo at June 01, 2026 11:22 PM (edUvp)

251
From a film, but I can only give you the punchline, because the setup is un-printable, even here:
"Then I'll just have a Coke."
Posted by: mnw

The Boondock Saints.
The joke is told by Rocco (played by David Della Rocco)

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:23 PM (QVmho)

252 Posted by: Pug Mahon, back from the road trip at June 01, 2026 11:03 PM (0aYVJ)

Good catch! I cut and pasted it (I think) and I should have caught that!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at June 01, 2026 11:23 PM (iERP6)

253 240

Correct. ("Night of the Comet")

I think you win the movie quote contest, Bif.

Do you do anything else besides watch movies?

Posted by: mnw at June 01, 2026 11:23 PM (RCjYY)

254 The note held a knock-knock joke.

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Gestapo. We will ask the questions!

Posted by: Hour of the Wolf at June 01, 2026 11:23 PM (qx7Zg)

255 251

Correctr again.

You should turn pro, Bif!

Posted by: mnw at June 01, 2026 11:24 PM (RCjYY)

256 It's 6:50 AM in Tehran, no bombing tonight, sigh.
Maybe next weekend.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 11:21 PM (M4gnG)
=====

What if they gave a war but no one came?

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 01, 2026 11:24 PM (RIvkX)

257 We have very little choice about our life. The only thing really left us is a choice about our death. And mine will be... glorious!
Posted by: r hennigantx

Although not many realize it, that's the actual theme of Bubba Hotep. It's well hidden, but it jumps out at the end.

Posted by: Tom Servo at June 01, 2026 11:24 PM (edUvp)

258 Now youse can't leave.

Posted by: JackStraw at June 01, 2026 11:25 PM (viF8m)

259 The Purifier (played by Linus Roache).
Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:21 PM (QVmho)

close Evil Knevil

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:25 PM (/+uur)

260 158 ...uh, I mean the troll Paul (or Sid), not this other Paul
Posted by: gKWVE cursing the timing at June 01, 2026 10:43 PM (gKWVE)

The walrus is Paul

Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK's Phone) at June 01, 2026 11:26 PM (QGaXH)

261 Although not many realize it, that's the actual theme of Bubba Hotep. It's well hidden, but it jumps out at the end.
Posted by: Tom Servo at June 01, 2026 11:24 PM (edUvp)

I was just quoting Evil

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:26 PM (/+uur)

262
Do you do anything else besides watch movies?
Posted by: mnw

Until 2004, when Junior-ette showed up to two married for twenty years 40 year olds with spare entertainment cash flow? Nope, that's damned near all we did. She was our 20th anniversary surprise and put a screeching halt to a movie every weekend. Little turd tapper took all the entertainment budget too.

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:26 PM (QVmho)

263 I took LDS-25 63 years ago.
Make of that what you will.

Something which may explain the difference - I was a lab guinea pig and what I was given was pure Sandoz (the Swiss Lab that invented the stuff. Lots of the streets hit was exactly that - shit. It contained a lot of unintended analog, and other chemicals.
DMT, DOM (STP), MDA... there are all sorts of psychoactive sold on the street, some accidentally adulterated, some deliberately.

I have no doubt that some people are fucked up.from using psychoactives, but I'm a counterexample for the "it's all terrible" claims.

Posted by: buddhaha at June 01, 2026 11:26 PM (PC+XL)

264 One of my all time favorite movie lines, which seems kinda topical right now, is "Anybody else wanna negotiate?"

best one word movie line is
"EVERYONE!!!!!"

Posted by: Tom Servo at June 01, 2026 11:27 PM (edUvp)

265 Night of the Comet was fun. Chakote. One of the chicks was on Ryan's Hope.

I don't do movie quotes. We are on the front porch shooting nuisance raccoons.

Posted by: BarelyScaryMary at June 01, 2026 11:27 PM (icdz0)

266 256

What if they gave a war and nobody came?

What if they gave a war, and the other side showed up, but we didn't?

Posted by: mnw at June 01, 2026 11:28 PM (RCjYY)

267
You should turn pro, Bif!
Posted by: mnw

We were barred from trivial pursuit at the bars.

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:28 PM (QVmho)

268 Seriously late to this party…
But my favorite movie line goes something like this:
“Great! I’ve got a Trig final tomorrow, and we’re being chased by Guido the killer pimp!”
Or something along those lines. Classic, no matter what the iteration…
Posted by: Gunslinger at June 01

Adventures in Babysitting?

Posted by: LASue at June 01, 2026 11:28 PM (lCppi)

269 I took LDS-25 63 years ago."

Did that make you grow a beard and start quoting Brigham Young?

Posted by: Tom Servo at June 01, 2026 11:28 PM (edUvp)

270 *wacks guitar against stairwell*

Sorry

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:29 PM (/+uur)

271 I don't do movie quotes. We are on the front porch shooting nuisance raccoons.

Ooh. Need company?
I can bring beer…

Posted by: Gunslinger at June 01, 2026 11:29 PM (HZfH/)

272 My girlfriend sucked 36 cocks!

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 11:29 PM (zZu0s)

273 One of my all time favorite movie lines, which seems kinda topical right now, is "Anybody else wanna negotiate?"

best one word movie line is
"EVERYONE!!!!!"

Posted by: Tom Servo

Didn't the fith element use a branch of that?

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:30 PM (QVmho)

274 “Great! I’ve got a Trig final tomorrow, and we’re being chased by Guido the killer pimp!”

The Freshman ???

Posted by: Adriane the Monday Critic on Monday . . . at June 01, 2026 11:30 PM (3ZUWJ)

275 243

Shower Scene
Posted by: Bilwis Devourer of Innocent Souls

Porky's?
Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:19 PM (QVmho)

I prefer the shower scene in American History X.

Posted by: Graham Platner at June 01, 2026 11:30 PM (yfRPb)

276 Adventures in Babysitting?

No, Risky Business!

Posted by: Gunslinger at June 01, 2026 11:30 PM (HZfH/)

277 Nuisance Raccoons opened for the Animals at the Cow Palace 1971.

Posted by: the concert dude at June 01, 2026 11:31 PM (cZPj9)

278 Every line in Stupopia

But Brawndo's got what plants crave. It's got electrolytes.

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:31 PM (/+uur)

279 "Slice off a cut loaf ain' t missed, mate"

"How are your eyes, sergeant?"
"Very poor, sir!"

Posted by: rhomboid at June 01, 2026 11:31 PM (U/Byj)

280 256 It's 6:50 AM in Tehran, no bombing tonight, sigh.
Maybe next weekend.

Posted by: Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ at June 01, 2026 11:21 PM (M4gnG)
**************************
I think Trump is playing with them, showing the world how diplomatic he is and he tried, but you can't deal with terrorists and then BOOMS.

Maybe the special stealth ones from space and they won't know what hit them til the nuke dust and shreds of turbans settle.

That's what I hope for at any rate. It ain't over.
Tousi was off today.

Last weekend I thought he was waiting for the Sauds to quit pacing the rock of Mecca for Eid or a goat eating holiday to go home. It sounds dreadful, the circles of where germs originate for the next virus explosions. I am sure it is very stinky and nasty.

Posted by: ChristyBlinkyTheGreat at June 01, 2026 11:31 PM (WONhk)

281 Ooh. Need company?
I can bring beer…

Posted by: Gunslinger at June 01, 2026 11:29 PM (HZfH/)

*fistbump*

They don't spook too easy, but don't show up all noisy and such.

Posted by: BarelyScaryMary at June 01, 2026 11:31 PM (icdz0)

282
“Great! I’ve got a Trig final tomorrow, and we’re being chased by Guido the killer pimp!”
Posted by: Gunslinger

Adventures in Babysitting?

Posted by: LASue

Risky Business!
Character: Miles Dalby (played by Curtis Armstrong, who went on to play Booger in Revenge of the Nerds).

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:32 PM (QVmho)

283 Didn't the fith element use a branch of that?
Posted by: BifBewalski - at Jun

The top one is fifth element. Bottom one is Gary Goldman in Leon or The Proffessional.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 11:32 PM (zZu0s)

284 'Lighten up Francis!"

Posted by: profligatewaste at June 01, 2026 11:32 PM (6nLUO)

285 Didn't the fith element use a branch of that?
Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:30 PM (QVmho)

Gary Oldman's Zorg is one of the most entertaining villains of all time.

Posted by: Tom Servo at June 01, 2026 11:32 PM (edUvp)

286 258

I remember that movie quite well, but I can't think of the name of it.

"Now youse can't leave" IS a memorable line.

Posted by: mnw at June 01, 2026 11:33 PM (RCjYY)

287 "Woof"

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero43) at June 01, 2026 11:33 PM (u/oMr)

288 Until 2004, when Junior-ette showed up to two married for twenty years 40 year olds with spare entertainment cash flow? Nope, that's damned near all we did. She was our 20th anniversary surprise and put a screeching halt to a movie every weekend. Little turd tapper took all the entertainment budget too.
Posted by: BifBewalski
----
In my family, that's referred to as the "September Surprise". I have a cousin who is 17 years younger than her sister, and 19 year younger than her brother.

Posted by: buddhaha at June 01, 2026 11:33 PM (PC+XL)

289 First time I dropped acid I had a corporate finance class the next morning and flashbacks throughout. The classroom had those newfangled whiteboard things and the professor was drawing curves and equations in colors. It most stimulating.

Posted by: San Franpsycho at June 01, 2026 11:33 PM (RIvkX)

290 You're under arrest, Joe.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 11:33 PM (zZu0s)

291 277 Nuisance Raccoons opened for the Animals at the Cow Palace 1971.
Posted by: the concert dude at June 01, 2026 11:31 PM (cZPj9)

Best band eva as no one know there identities

Posted by: r hennigantx at June 01, 2026 11:33 PM (/+uur)

292 They mostly come at night. Mostly.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 11:34 PM (zZu0s)

293

Bed time for Bif. Y'all behave and don't make CBD swing Mjolnir

Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:35 PM (QVmho)

294 238 "My mama didn't raise me to be makin no guesses in front of any yankee officers" (might be off a little)

Horse Soldiers?
Posted by: OrangeEnt at June 01, 2026 11:18 PM (1Ff7Z)

'She Wore a Yellow Ribbon'

Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK's Phone) at June 01, 2026 11:35 PM (QGaXH)

295 279

"...cut loaf"

Breaker Morant, I believe.

Posted by: mnw at June 01, 2026 11:35 PM (RCjYY)

296 You're new on Harry's team, aren't you?

Yes. Yes, sir.

So in what way do you think the... slack i cut him in any way extends to you? *gestures with knife*

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 11:36 PM (zZu0s)

297 Shower Scene
Posted by: Bilwis Devourer of Innocent Souls

Porky's?
Posted by: BifBewalski - at June 01, 2026 11:19 PM (QVmho)

I prefer the shower scene in American History X.
Posted by: Graham Platner at June 01, 2026 11:30 PM (yfRPb)

***

Starship Troopers

Posted by: Diogenes at June 01, 2026 11:36 PM (2WIwB)

298 Correct, mnw. Both of the lines I put up.

Bryan Brown had most of the great lines of the many in that movie. Which I highly recommend to those who've never seen it. A small, quiet masterpiece of sorts.

Posted by: rhomboid at June 01, 2026 11:36 PM (U/Byj)

299 I didnt realize we were supposed to be guessing, I just thought we were quoting.

Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 11:37 PM (zZu0s)

300 Did that make you grow a beard and start quoting Brigham Young?
Posted by: Tom Servo
------
I've had a beard for about 45 years, and I'm surrounded by Mormons here in N AZ, but B. Young of the 56 Wives is not a source I use.

Posted by: buddhaha at June 01, 2026 11:39 PM (PC+XL)

301 Gary Oldman's Zorg is one of the most entertaining villains of all time.

Posted by: Tom Servo at June 01, 2026 11:32 PM (edUvp)

Gary Oldman is my favorite actor. He has been in some crap movies. He's been in so-so movies. He's been in some fuckin' great movies. He was always magnetic. Sigh.

Posted by: BarelyScaryMary at June 01, 2026 11:39 PM (icdz0)

302 Don't recall the actors names or the real-life equivalents' names, but the senior British officers in The Great Escape and Bridge on the River Kwai were not the same actors (well, I remember Alec Guiness as that character).

Both movies depicted real events, to a point. Escape was much closer to the history, though still modified for movie purposes.

There was a bridge on the river Kwai in Thailand, but it wasn't like the one portrayed in the movie, IIRC. It was a low, partly steel bridge with cement piers. Thailand (I believe) actually renamed a stretch of a river Kwai to sort of match up the movie and real history. A fascinating true story involves one of the Japanese army overseers and a British officer captive. The Brit officer testified at the Japanese officer's post-war tribunal, to support clemency. Don't recall the details but it was one of those "where do we find such people?" events.

Posted by: rhomboid at June 01, 2026 11:41 PM (U/Byj)

303 286 258

I remember that movie quite well, but I can't think of the name of it.

"Now youse can't leave" IS a memorable line.
Posted by: mnw at June 01, 2026 11:33 PM (RCjYY)

A Bronx Tale

Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK's Phone) at June 01, 2026 11:41 PM (QGaXH)

304 Where are we going?

Planet TEN!

When?

REAL
SOON!!

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 01, 2026 11:41 PM (O7rK+)

305

put
the candle
back

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at June 01, 2026 11:43 PM (Cqx++)

306 This was fun!

Thank you for ONT CBD.

Good Night from California Everyone

Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK's Phone) at June 01, 2026 11:44 PM (QGaXH)

307 'She Wore a Yellow Ribbon'
Posted by: Anonymous Rogue in Kalifornistan (ARiK's Phone) at June 01, 2026 11:35 PM (QGaXH)

Ah. I was thinking it was the two deserters in THS.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at June 01, 2026 11:44 PM (1Ff7Z)

308 "Heil me. Heil me!!"

Posted by: LASue at June 01, 2026 11:45 PM (lCppi)

309 Now youse can't leave.
Posted by: JackStraw at June 01, 2026 11:25 PM (viF8m)

Spiderman? The cage match?

The best response that comes to mind is "I'm not locked in here with you, you're locked in here with me"

Posted by: Methos at June 01, 2026 11:45 PM (vSvIl)

310
Don't recall the actors names or the real-life equivalents' names, but the senior British officers in The Great Escape and Bridge on the River Kwai were not the same actors (well, I remember Alec Guiness as that character).

James Donald was a British officer in both movies.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at June 01, 2026 11:45 PM (Cqx++)

311 I didnt realize we were supposed to be guessing, I just thought we were quoting.
Posted by: Aetius451AD work phone at June 01, 2026 11:37 PM (zZu0s)

Wasn't sure either. Mine were easy but no one tried guessing.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at June 01, 2026 11:45 PM (1Ff7Z)

312 One of my favorite Lyle Lovett songs (written by Townes vanZandt:

https://tinyurl.com/IfINeededYouLyleLovett

*********

Movie lines:

If you weren't all those things, do you think Vic would be out this afternoon getting you a gun permit?

A gun permit? I don't need a gun permit!

You have to have one if you're going to be carrying a gun.

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, AoSHQ's Plucky Wee One - Eat the Cheesecake, Buy the Yarn. at June 01, 2026 11:46 PM (SRRAx)

313 301 BSM

Gary Oldman was fantastic in a a small, largely forgotten film called "The Firm." If you're a big Oldman fan I think you'd enjoy it-- if you can find it. He made it before he got famous. Be warned, though: it's about soccer hooligans.

(Not to be confused with a big Hollywood cast iron turkey of the same name, about an evil law firm.)

Posted by: mnw at June 01, 2026 11:46 PM (RCjYY)

314 I got threes and a gun

Evil Roy Slade.

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 01, 2026 11:46 PM (O7rK+)

315 It would be unbecoming if I did not supply some of the best quotes from Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans, where I used shock collars and veterinary supplies to force Nick Cage to deliver lines like these.

Terence (Cage): Shoot them again!
Deshun: What for?
Terence: Their souls are still dancing!

Posted by: Werner Herzog Has Opinions at June 01, 2026 11:48 PM (3SVXD)

316 We’re gonna need a shitload of dimes.

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 01, 2026 11:48 PM (O7rK+)

317 I got threes and a gun

Evil Roy Slade.
Posted by: nurse ratched at June 01, 2026 11:46 PM (O7rK+)

It's Flossie!

Posted by: OrangeEnt at June 01, 2026 11:48 PM (1Ff7Z)

318 We're going to Jersey?

Posted by: Don Black at June 01, 2026 11:48 PM (ZxPkt)

319 That’s no moon.

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 01, 2026 11:48 PM (O7rK+)

320 Evening, CBD and ONT Horde. Back home at Peon Manor. Cat cuddle interfering with typing.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at June 01, 2026 11:48 PM (1z8ji)

321
Evil Roy Slade.
Posted by: nurse ratched

Don't let him sell you any shoes.

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at June 01, 2026 11:48 PM (Cqx++)

322 Well, that's just dumb and stupid.

Posted by: OrangeEnt at June 01, 2026 11:49 PM (1Ff7Z)

323 AOP!

Sweet kitty. Give scratches from me.

Posted by: nurse ratched at June 01, 2026 11:50 PM (O7rK+)

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